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neteyamsilly · 1 year

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i will soften every edge, hold the world to its best | 3

summary ;; Sullys stick together. You learn the hard way what happens when you don't. PART 2 | PART 4 pairings ;; dad!jake sully x reader, mom!neytiri x reader, sully family x reader genre ;; pure angst and family feels notes / explanations ;; descriptions of blood and violence incoming, beware! shout out to the ppl who predicted the stuff in this chapter LMAO so um... i couldnt tag everybody who asked when i said i would... there's apparently a limit to how many people you can tag. please forgive me 😭 im not taking any tagging requests anymore since i cant do it. so sorry about that,,,, seriously also, thank you so much for 1160 followers! i still cant fucking believe it... daddy issues solidarity 🤙🏻🤙🏻

“Hi there Corporal, you hear me? Yeah, I know you do. As much as I’m charmed by the fatherly love I could give you a big old sloppy wet kiss, we have unfinished business.”

Rain covered the rustling of clothes and the click-clacks of readjusted weapons as concentrated silence hung in the air, thick and heavy like the morning mist swallowing up the forest.

No answer.

What face could your parents be making right now? Heartbeat in your ears, you tried to hide your shame by looking down, but a jerk on your queue set you straight. the avatar holding you digging his gun sharper in your neck.

“What, cat got your tongue all of a sudden?” The leader’s stare found yours. “Let me give you a quick remedy.”

They’d linked your device into another for the sound to be relayed outside and the voice detection range could be wider, in other words, they wanted your father to hear what was happening to you. Your braid was yanked as if the one pulling it wanted to snap it right off your skull, no amount of training could stop the scream torn out of you — all the show just for him.

The line was deadly still, save for some rustling, crackling static that you could have easily mistaken for hissing.

A ghost of a smile shadowed the man’s face, he extended his rifle to tip your chin up. “Guess we’re gonna have to be louder than that to wake daddy up sweetheart.”

“Stop!” Father yelled, the unexpected timing of it made you jump. That earned him a group chuckle from the avatars around you. “Stop.”

He talked. He didn’t leave you to fend for yourself in this. Thank Eywa!

“That was fast,” the captor behind you said.

“Thought you’d have forgotten English by now, playing native.”

“...Quaritch?”

Quaritch. That awful, awful man from the stories your mother killed? Spider’s father? But… But he was dead. How could sky people know how to cheat death?

“In the flesh.”

Father’s voice wavered, you’d think he was scared if you didn’t know any better. “That’s impossible.”

“Back from the grave just for you, Jake.”

“Then I’ll just have to put you right back where you belong.”

The squad of avatars openly laughed at that, boisterous, confident, arrogant.

This was Toruk Makto they were openly mocking. None of them would last for one minute in front of him and yet—

“Quite the teary lovers reunion we’re havin’ here, but you got busy while I was gone, huh?” He looked down at you again, yellow eyes filled with mirth. “I have this tiny bird here we plucked right out of the air. Imagine my surprise to learn she’s yours. Is this the only one, or you got yourself a litter now?”

Silence again.

“What do you want?”

“Straight to the point as always.” The smug smile momentarily twitched into an unamused, withheld resentment. This man was nearing the end of his capacity to keep taunting. “I don’t think I’ll tell yet. You know I love to be a tease.”

Your ears rotated upwards in treacherous hope at your father's next words. “If you touch one hair on my daughter’s head I swear to god—”

“You exchanged your god for this shithole, Jake. Let’s not kid ourselves now.” Any hint of playing around was gone, now, eyes fixated on something on the ground ahead. “Your daughter will be my guest for a while. Think of it as summer vacation. Don’t worry, unlike the Na’vi, we’re very hospitable.” His thumb brushed over a button. “Until next time.”

“Fucking bastard—”

With one beep, the call was over. Quaritch was touching the band around his neck this time. “Iron Sky, Blue on Actual. We are standing by for extract, over.”

You began to tussle against the avatar behind your back. “No! No! Let me go!”

“Be advised. We're bringing in a high value prisoner.”

“Dad’s really gonna flay her alive this time, I can’t wait.” Lo’ak, positioned just behind the flap of the tent to not be seen from the outside as he peeked with one eyeball just in case, was watching his parents vehemently yell at each other in whispers that started out loud, but got hushed probably to not reach him and his siblings. Aggressive limb gestures were flying in the air, and at one point, his mom had tried to run off somewhere and was forcefully stopped.

Dad was currently pacing around like a wild animal with one hand permanently stuck rubbing his face, and mom turned away from him, holding her forehead. “They’re really going at it, huh?

Kiri was not amused with his insistence to breach their privacy. “What’s so interesting about watching this kind of thing?”

“Catharsis?” He remarked in English, feeling sophisticated. “You remember Spider talking about it? Purification and emotional cleansing through relief that you’re not going through the horrible tragedy, the character on stage is.”

“You’re normally so dumb.” Lo’ak bore his fangs at her matter-of-fact tone of voice. “Your brain only comes back on when it’s about chaos.”

“I’m petty, and what about it?” A tilt of his head to dare Kiri to ask for her point, then his attention was thwarted by an incomprehensible cry from his mother. She was pushing dad from his arms, furious like Lo’ak had never seen before as the upset man tried to hold her more. “Look at mom and dad breathing fire at each other! You think they’re discussing how to punish her?”

“Stop spying already skxawng, mom will be angry if she sees you. We’re supposed to be in bed.”

“Shut up, I’m trying to listen here!” His ears were tilting at every angle to make out any words that reached to him as nothing but a cluster of broken sounds. “Why did they have to go far?”

“Because they wanted to be away from peeping toms like you?”

“And you’re still here too, so?” Lo’ak gave his sister a meaningful look. “I know you wanna see too.”

“Ugh!” Kiri shoved out her tongue at him, eyes dead. “And it’s not funny, by the way! They are fighting. Stop being happy about it.”

He knew they were fighting about his older sister, and that she’d get all the heat and fallout from it the moment she was back. Lo’ak’s head was full of what he could get out of it, or what to ask her for in return for helping her out in her detention. So satisfying to be the sibling who wasn’t in trouble. He should do it more, actually. “It is funny when it’s not about me.”

“You’re sick for taking joy in another’s suffering.”

“Oh, I’m doomed, then.” Kiri took whatever fat was on his thin arm between her thumb and forefinger, and twisted. Lo’ak had to blink away the tears that rushed to his eyes, snatching his limb away from the displeased girl and pushing her away in return — he was annoyed at how much that hurt, why was that so damaging for no reason? “Yeouch! What the hell?”

“Will it kill you to practice mindfulness once in a while?”

He raised his voice’s pitch to mock the wobbly, ear-scratching whine of yours, and exaggerated his body movements to match, too. “I hate you!”

“Gross.” She tried to shove him, he caught her hands in the air, pushing her back and getting the spiteful annoyance of his sister as a result. “Dad was actually hurt by that.” Lo’ak’s eyes could roll down the hills by themselves the way that sounded, but Kiri, as always, was bothered so inexplicably. “I don’t like this. I have a bad feeling.”

That bad feeling was the herald of dad’s upcoming cranky ill-temper and what would follow after you inevitably had to come crawling back home with tail between your legs, Neteyam dragging you from the scruff of your neck. Lo’ak was refusing to sleep so he could enjoy the fight.

“Me personally, am over the moon, ikran duty is so gonna be off my hands. For months.” He halted at the idea that just went off in his head, tail swishing with the hype. “I wanna tell Spider. I’ll go get him.”

“Absolutely not. You sneak off now and they’ll laser-focus all the anger on you!” Kiri was pointing a warning hand at him, but slowly lowered it, one corner of her mouth twitching up. She was holding back amusement. “Hey, you know what? Nevermind, you can go. I want you to go. I have to see this.”

“Ha-ha.” Lo’ak’s tail stuttered, losing enthusiasm. “Attempted murder, much?”

“Guys, what’s going on…”

Upon the unexpected voice that wobbled its way into their conversation, they both looked down to see Tuk gripping her weaved blanket with one hand and dragging it on the floor as she made her way to them, the other rubbing her eyes one by one so sleep dripping from them would fly away.

“See, you woke her up! What do we do now?”

“You woke her up by yelling, why is it my fault now?”

“I didn’t, you—”

“Did too.”

“Did not.”

“Did too.”

“Did n—”

“Guys…” Tuk pulled on Kiri’s hand, and the foreign object she was clutching the whole time distracted Lo’ak. It must have dug into the older one’s skin that she carefully picked it up to inspect. The ear pieces they took off before they went to sleep. This one was Kiri’s. “Neteyam’s calling. You didn’t hear…”

Grinning, Lo’ak snatched it up and skipped backwards and put it in his own ear, ignoring Kiri’s hushed yells to give it back now and the groans about ruining it with his stinky, cheesy earwax. He had to keep bouncing around, the girl was chasing him around the tent. “Bro! Tell her she’s sooo dead. Dad’s literally keeping guard in front of the tent—”

“Lo’ak, quit it.” Neteyam’s tremulous answer was harsh. Lo’ak’s smile wavered as he dodged Kiri’s arm and jumped over discarded cups on the floor, knocking over wooden spoons. “I need you to tell me what’s happening over there.”

“Aw, baby’s so scared to come back she needs to make a game plan first?” He laughed, slapping Kiri’s hands away. “I’ll only tell if she gives back my karambit knife.”

His older brother sighed, a bit too exasperated.

“Yeah, I’m not letting that one go and I’m also making it your problem—”

“Lo’ak, she isn’t here.”

He stopped dead in his tracks. “What?”

“She isn’t here. I couldn’t find her.” Kiri bumped into him, unable to stop herself at the right time to hit the brakes due to how abruptly Lo’ak had stilled. They’d almost tumbled over. “Dad told me to wait until he contacts her and I’ve been waiting for minutes. Now tell me what’s going on over there.”

“Bro, you’re serious?”

“Why wouldn’t I be serious, skxawng!”

He turned to Kiri in disgusted discomfort, who had damn-near glued her own ear to his to hear better. “Forget months, I’ll be free for years. Dad’s not gonna let her take one step off the camp anymore.”

The girl would stomp her foot if she was a couple years younger. “What’s this about?”

And Neteyam would shake Lo’ak from the neck for ignoring him this long while he was fussing. “Tell me already you—!”

“They’re having a fight bro.” He leaned better to peep outside the tent. “Yeah.”

“She came back? Why didn’t you tell me?”

It was uncommon for Neteyam to completely disregard the previous input he’d been given. Lo’ak didn’t understand this level of anxiety. “Are you having a brain fart? Would we be having this conversation if she was here? It’s mom and dad who are fighting.”

It wasn’t that serious — on the contrary, his sister was quite simple to understand. She didn’t want to be found and had changed her place of hiding. End of story. The golden boy’s worrywart nature was keeping him from reasoning.

“Don’t be a smartass.” Lo’ak practically felt Neteyam’s want to land a loud smack on his back. “Were they only able to reach her, then? Is that why they’re fighting?”

“You’re asking me?—”

The older boy began to grumble under his breath. “This is why I called Kiri.”

Said girl’s ears perked up over picking her name from the static-surrounded line. Lo’ak snorted. “Ouch, bro.”

Kiri shook him from the elbow. “Me? What about me?”

“Great title for your autobiography.”

Kiri raised her arms to give him a beating and Lo’ak was already bolting away from anywhere near her vicinity. The siblings didn’t even take notice of the line with Neteyam going dark as they focused on their own play-scuffle for a while.

Until Lo’ak bumped into someone.

It wasn’t Tuk.

Shoulders pulled into himself, he turned around torturously freaked out to find dad standing there like a ghost, his tactical vest packed to the brim and gun hanging from his back the way they wore their bows.

The blue of his skin had faded into an ashier tone, amber eyes wide and bloodshot, the veins on the normally put together Olo’eyktan’s forehead were bulging, even a socially clueless person would pick up something was seriously wrong. He commanded cold authority of the battlefield simply by the way he stood, immediately triggering Lo’ak into soldier mode.

He took a few steps back, chin hanging low at the lightless, unblinking stare his father pushed down on him. “Sir.”

All the sleepiness that had Tuk unresponsive and nodding off through Lo’ak and Kiri’s push-and-pull was knocked out of her at the sight, she was now unnerved and frightened. “Dad?”

The man’s intensity was somehow eased by his youngest’s reaction, but he held back from taking her in his arms like he normally would to comfort her, didn’t even care to remark on how they were supposed to be sleeping — how they’d woken their little sister up, instead focusing on Lo’ak. “I want you all to listen well. Your mother and I are heading out for a minute and your grandmother will be with you soon — Neteyam is Oscar-Mike to come back here. Stay put and don’t go anywhere, understand?” His finger pointed accusingly at him. “Don’t cause trouble. Looking at you boy, what I’m saying here is Marine proof. I’m at the end of my wits here, don’t even think about slipping a tail out of this tent.”

The potent severity of whatever the hell was making him this agitated to the point of a voice so hoarse it was unrecognizable got the wheels in Lo’ak’s head whirring. “What’s happening, dad?”

“One child!” The thundering shout came down on him with the force of a falling mountain, making Lo’ak jump out of his skin. “I need one child of mine to listen to me without asking any questions today!” Dad’s voice broke when Tuk whined, he shut his eyes as if he was in physical pain, and flexed his jaw, shaking his head and pulling the girl in from her shoulders to soothe her. Still no direct hugging. “Jesus Christ.”

“I’m sorry sir,” Lo’ak said immediately, distraught by the over-the-top reaction, hands unknowingly curling into fists by his sides. Whenever that sky people word ‘Jesus’ slipped from dad not having any control between the border of his two languages, the boy knew it was demanding gravitas. “I heard you CFB.”

“Good.” He thinned his lips. “Kiri, please.”

Lo’ak frowned at dad basically asking for her to play her brother’s keeper in Neteyam’s absence in two simple words.

She nodded. “I know dad.”

He caught a glimpse of his mother running in the distance, her father’s bow in her hand.

Just what was happening? What had you done?

Eywa, it had to be sky people.

Dad saw the realization in his face. “Stay,” he emphasized, one final time before he was also gone with the wind.

Lo’ak wouldn’t have obeyed if it wasn’t for his grandmother arriving just in time, keeping them busy with a story about the arrival of a wounded ikran with no rider.

You realized the gunshot wound puncturing your upper abdomen was there the whole time when the avatars put first aid and later slapped a rectangular sky people bandage on it that helped clotting or whatever it was called, the pain simply not being there had played a big factor in it with the body running on pure adrenaline.

(Crouching close to you, Quaritch had bragged, “We aren’t so bad after all, huh, sweetheart? It’s called civilization. Your daddy ever taught you about that?”

Civilization, your ass. They needed you. There was nothing well-meaning about what they were doing.

And the nickname had ticked you off, sullying the good memories of father, your head slammed into his nose in full power after a hiss.

“Now my daddy taught me that!” you spat in English as other avatars had tackled you. The man claiming to be Quaritch was smiling as he wiped away the blood trickling down his nose.

What was the point in trying to patch you up if they were going to do this, then?)

You were now a part of an elaborate trap to lure your father in. Bait. The worst position to be in. This was the kind of trouble Lo’ak would get himself in. It was too late to go back now, the mess you’d gotten yourself into had made itself known.

Think, think! How could you get out of this?

Within the unsleeping forest’s nightly noises chirping all around you, a specific call in the air halted your train of thought.

It was mom.

Your parents were here. But how? How did they know where you were, exactly? Dread and expectation pooled in your heart, coexisting in a nauseating mix.

Father must be thinking that you already caused so much trouble, they couldn’t know you were also hurt, you’d never hear the end of it.

But there was no time to think, the pain you should have been feeling was ebbing its way into your body, and she was calling in the night to inform you to get ready.

All hell broke loose when the man who held you tight from your queue was shot right from the back of his head with an arrow, collapsing right on top of you.

You couldn’t get away in time to not be crushed by his dead body and promptly got squished between the mossy soil and him, his gun was hurting you, the wound on your stomach getting in the way of you using your core to push the body off.

How many minutes had passed with you struggling to get him off as a hurricane of bullets roared, you didn’t know (it hurt, pain was climbing towards the threshold) — mom was able to break free from the weight of a whole AMP suit, as you’d heard as a child, a Na’vi was naturally strong, but you couldn’t even crawl out. Panic was a rope tightening around your ribcage as your breathing picked up

All of a sudden, the weight was gone, and the only remaining thing from it was the big gun left from the avatar you found yourself hugging for dear life, eyes wide as saucers. Before you could see whoever had done that, you got hoisted up right back on your feet and tried to run, only to be held tighter and pulled behind the trunk of a tree.

“Hey, it’s me, it’s me!” Clumsy, overwrought hands were cupping your cheeks and — and oh, it was your father.

You didn’t know whether to be afraid or cry from happiness.

Once he was sure you registered it was him by staring intently in your eyes with that edge of the softness you’d missed so much, his hold shifted to your neck and around your shoulders, and he gave you a look-over, checking for any wounds. Too bad what he was searching for was behind the gun you were holding. “Are you hurt?” He shook you when you were too stunned to answer. “Are you hurt at all?”

“No,” you shook your head automatically, it was weak against the explosions of bullets raining down all around you, but father had picked it up regardless, only focusing on you for the moment.

In the darkness, nobody could see the blood running down your body, that bandage had come out at one point.

“On my mark, we’re gonna run, okay?” He nodded to you, tomahawk axe in hand coated in a dark substance, commanding your full attention. “Follow me. Ready? Ready?”

You weren’t ready at all, stomach feeling like it was being stabbed at every heartbeat, but you couldn’t tell him that.

Instead, you ran like hell, moored by father’s taut clutch on your forearm pulling you forward to match his incredible speed dodging roots, bushes and branches.

Things stopped moving only when you were enveloped in mom’s embrace, consciousness almost flying off from the relief that washed over you. Kisses were peppered along your hairline and forehead, her mumbling your name in gratitude blending with your panting. Tears burned bitter in your eyes, but you couldn’t cry, not when father was looking at you like that, chest rising and falling. You instantaneously remembered why you were holding that gun at the intensity he was radiating, tail escaping between your legs and letting mom hold you.

At least this way he wasn’t able to objurgate you.

Over her shoulder, you saw three ikrans instead of two. Heart soaring, you were skipping towards him in pure astonishment in a heartbeat. “Hey buddy!”

His head lowered down towards you in bird-like movements. In this angle, it looked like he was giving you a razor sharp-toothed big grin.

“He brought us here,” your mother said. The hand you were going to pet the ikran with stopped midway at her dejected tone. “You have passed Iknimaya, I take it. On your own.”

You didn’t know what to say, feeling immense guilt at having made her this disappointed over it. If this was any normal situation, any normal fight at all, you would have shot back with, ‘Well father told me to do it.’

But you were tired.

Your pain threshold was being threatened, and you needed to get to your grandmother before any of your parents saw the situation you were in and this escalated into the worst fight you were going to get into in your entire life.

Father’s only response was a dead cold, “C’mon, we gotta get outta here.”

He didn’t talk to you after that. Not one word.

Squatting on an ikran’s back on a flight with an abdominal gunshot wound you were trying to hide was not an option unless you wanted to pass out midair and was looking for a free dive, so you were all but hugging the poor thing’s neck like a monkey, trusting him to follow your parents while you concentrated on mentally fighting to level out the pain.

Nonsensical as it was to believe the gun stuck between your ikran’s neck and your stomach was acting as a tampon to lessen the bleeding, you were concerned with how dumb it must have looked to father and mom, how incompetent they must think of you that their daughter didn’t even know how to ride right.

Got an ikran for nothing.

Would they be less proud of you seeing how funny it appeared, nevermind that it was to contain your pain all the while not trying to faint?

But no words were exchanged about it.

Father clamping up right after he’d made sure you weren’t hurt (yikes) had resulted in this awkward trip succumbing in total silence. They had sandwiched you between them, only necessary space for the ikrans to beat their wings freely left, so close that you could discern the scariest look on father yet, deepening the lines of age in his face while simultaneously expressing his barely contained desire to kill someone.

A ticking time bomb.

Forget speaking at all, but not only did he never address you until now, he didn’t even look in your direction for once. You knew because staring at him for five minutes straight for him to just acknowledge your existence had proven to be unfruitful.

And the tears involuntarily streamed down your cheeks with how utterly worthless and alone that made you feel, trapped in this agony you couldn’t help but hide because he’d think you didn’t deserve to complain after bringing it upon yourself. You would rather bite your tongue and bear the pain than stay dreading his reaction.

Yeah, no, he couldn’t know.

Mom was looking over at you every one minute to make sure you were okay after her ears picked up on your sniffles, arrows of worry shot from her side sinking down your skin every single time, and you hated to make her this way.

Your ikran kept comforting you through tsaheylu until you landed.

Father had promptly jumped down, agile and making haste away somewhere, passing you by and giving the cold shoulder. You all but slid off your own ikran, managing to make the gun stay where it should be, as you couldn’t help but weakly call out to him for one drop of consolation. “Father…”

He didn’t stop for you, quickening his steps, but his ears twitched, the tail beating the air ferociously halting and lowering before it returned to the previous motions, and those were the only indications that he’d heard it Lima Charlie.

The man just didn’t want to talk to you.

And you had to make yourself believe it wasn’t the emotional devastation that had you falling down, but the wound sucking out all your energy now that you had gotten to safety.

“Ma’ite?” Mom rushed to you. “Ma’ite, what’s wrong? What is it?”

“I’m okay, mom, it’s okay.” You were sitting on the floor, cross-legged. Thank goodness you still had the unbreakable willpower (and not the fear of Eywa put into you by father) to hold your shit together. “I’m okay. Just tired. My knees buckled. Weak, you know?” You swallowed, smiling. “I’m just… Just resting.”

Her gaze full of concern studied you, zeroing in on the gun you clung on for dear life against your stomach. Her hands lovingly brushed your hair, gripped your shoulders and elbows even though you were disgustingly clammy all over. It was grounding, anchoring within the ocean of pain washing over you in waves.

“Oh, why are you sweating so much? You’re freezing.” You clutched the gun harder in a panic when she grasped it, most likely to put it away. It was the wrong reaction to have, but you weren’t exactly in the position to function healthily.

Mom, as any other person would, got suspicious from it, her eyes flying up to your owlish ones — blanked out like a frightened animal. “You’re fine now,” she whispered, thankfully attributing it to how disturbed you must be, still not out of survival mode. “You are safe, my daughter. Mom is here.” She cupped your cheek, but every touch to your body hurt now, even when it was away from the gaping wound, still gushing blood, trickling down your hips and getting you scared that it’d be discovered once you stood up. “I’m here.” She searched your soul to know just why you were grimacing at her attempts of comforting. “I will take this now, you do not need it anymore.”

You snapped out of the gradually darkening gray haze mom’s lulling was laying you down gingerly into. “No, please don’t,” your breathing hitched. She was going to see. She couldn’t see. You had to avoid this somehow, as long as you could. Grandmother’s tent. You would make it, you had to. “I’ll… I’ll just sit here for a while, okay? I need to just… take a small break, and then I’ll… Can you go back? I’ll follow later. Father is angry, I don’t—”

“Nonsense.” Incredulous and enraged suddenly about something you couldn’t put a finger on, and before you could stop her, she tried to haul you up with her by gripping your upper arms — colors exploded behind your eyelids, getting you you to lose consciousness for two seconds, your vision flooding back in a starry kaleidoscope. When mom’s voice reached your ears, it was in staccato exclaims your ears were ringing too much to discern. She was shaking you.

You weren’t able to sit up straight anymore, leaning forward — mom had caught you, utterly confused and panicked at the same time. And then your head was lying on the crook of her elbow resting on her legs she’d tucked under herself. The moment you’d switched from sitting to straight up lying down was missing from your memories.

A baby being cradled. Yes, this is exactly what it was like. Gentle arms surrounded you amidst the pulsating sea of agony.

Your body was letting go, but your arms were vices around the gun, still holding that last line. Don’t let go. Don’t let go. They can’t know. Father will be so mad if he learns. “‘m okay… ‘st restin’…”

When your eyes cleared enough for the surroundings to be only a bit blurry, your mom was looking at the hand she’d just tried to take away the gun with, caked with your blood that had stained it, out of it and perplexed like she didn’t want to believe it.

Her gut-wrenchingly stunned numbness sent the misery clawing its way inside into overdrive, pulling your consciousness down to the earth from the clouds it was ascending to. “Not mine,” you forced out, but it came out as begging. Everything was falling apart. The plan was so simple, why couldn’t you do anything right? “Not mine. Please. Mom, it’s okay.”

“No…” Mumbling, she started sharply swaying back and forth, and with one brutally vigorous attack, she ripped the gun away from your arms, and hurled it away — then it was over. Your sob wasn’t due to the motion hurting you, it was all entirely for the broken wail of your mother at seeing the bloodied mess, tears spilling from her eyes as she reached down to press down at the pouring liquid. “No! No! Oh Great Mother! Why did you hide this! Oh, my daughter!”

“No, mom, I’m fine, it’s nothing. Not my blood. Not my blood, okay?” You reached up weakly and wiped at her cheeks with trembling fingers, your heart got crushed worse than the pain could beat you down at her grief — lungs constricting. Where was all the air? “I’ll get up. I’ll go to grandmother, don’t cry. Just resting.”

Frantically looking around, she yelled, “Jake!—” but her voice didn’t quite come out, breathy as if she’d been punched in the ribcage seconds prior.

A heartbeat’s worth of nothingness, after which you were full-on freaking out. Only one thought: Father will be angry.

“No!” You shrieked, and blood swelled in one strong pump against mom’s fingers. She looked down at you in anguish, pupils blown wide, arm tightening around you as if you were a flailing bird. “Don’t tell him! Don’t tell father! He’ll really kill me for this—”

“No, no no no,” she shook her head, frenzied, tone cracked from beginning to end. “Do not say that. Don’t you ever say that—”

But you were struggling in her arms, wanting nothing but to crawl away into a hole, no reason registering whatsoever, only instinct. “He’ll be so angry,” you begged, pleading, pink spit bubbling at the corners of your mouth. The sound of gurgling accompanying the words you forced your whole body to form. “You can’t tell him — you can’t! He already hates me!”

The more you thrashed around and kicked your legs, the more you bled.

“Please, Great Mother!” The more mom lost her mind, hissing and howling hysterically, crazed, hugging you tighter and rocking. “Jake! Jake! Ma’Jake!” She put her temple against yours. “Not my daughter, please, Eywa…”

Why was she being like this? It wasn’t that serious! You were okay!

Delirium claimed you hot as she kept calling his name and her unbreakable hold on you kept you in a cage of a mother’s despair. In your feverish mind, a threat to your life was coming. Weakness spread like wildfire around your body and chipped away at the pain, slowly picking it apart to replace it with drowsiness. “Don’t call ‘im,” you continued to repeat, over and over again. “I’m just taking a break. Don’t call him over. He’s gonna be angry. He’ll hate me. He hates me. Please, mom.”

The sentences slurred together, shortened, wilted away pitifully, your voice died down, tongue deteriorating into only echoing, “He hates me.” A withered away, old flute.

Your ikran was bellowing in the distance and you looked. The torches on cave walls were illuminating him and finally revealing to you his beautiful color scheme.

And then your father was here, falling to his knees right beside you, his glistening wide eyes flying everywhere around your body — tracing all the blood, hands hovering above you as if he didn’t know where to start piecing a shattered vase back together.

It was over.

Fully expecting the chastising you were about to receive to shake the floating mountains so bad the enemy would be able to spot you, you began to apologize — pride be damned, this battle be lost, you’d failed anyway. “Please don’t be mad,” you shuddered, meek and unsteady, tunnel vision flickering at the edges only perceiving him. “It’s my fault—I’m sorry—please don’t be angry—”

“Stop talking,” he ordered, rough and harsh, eyebrows knitted tightly, and out of breath — probably because of how hard he was trying to hold the anger back. You knew. That had to be it. “Don’t speak.”

Ah of course. This was only natural when he had refused to utter a single word at you the whole way, denying you the temporary comfort of a simple glance.

Even the hand he pressed down so ruthlessly firm on your stomach it might as well be a boulder pinning you down was meant to be punishment, the whines your unbreathing lungs couldn’t stop turned into yowls — you hadn’t even noticed your hands were wrapped around father’s wrist in an effort to push him away, scratching him, but he only added his other hand on top of the other in return.

“Hang on, sweetheart, I got you, please hang on a little longer,” he pleaded, but you were already too far gone, Eywa was cruel to have plugged your ears to the endearment you’d been dying to hear from him for so long, making the last things you were aware father said to you the fact that he didn’t even want to hear you talking.

And you fulfilled his wish.

taglist: @ihonestlydontknowwhattonamethis@alohastitch0626 @jackiehollanderr @lucciera @qvrcll @iloveavatar @velvtcherie @ssc7514 @goldenmoonbeam @neteyamforlife @itsluludoll @jakesullys-bitch @blubrryy @sully-stick-together @arminsgfloll @alice121804 @noname2246 @justthingzsblog @eywamygoddess @m-1234 @ellabellabus07 @hellok1ttycake @dakotali @bluefire12348 @abbersreads @yellooaaa @aimsro @octavias-next-meat-bite @nikqdn @nao-cchi @spicycloudsalad @yeosxxx @heybiatchz @winxschester @elegantkidfansoul @eichenhouseproperty @kakimakiloh @dueiosy @liyahsocorro @dimplesxx @tigresslily @n8ivatar @strnqer @lillybbyy @jakesullyssluttt @r3dc4ndy @myheartfollower @gcldtom @bunnyrose01 @aceofheartzzz @ghoulbli @slasherfcker505 @ducks118 @megsthings @graykageyama @gwolf92

#dad!jake x daughter!reader #dad!jake sully x reader #dad!jake sully x daughter!reader #jake sully x reader #jake sully x daughter!reader #sully family x reader #mom!neytiri x reader #neteyam x sister!reader #neytiri x daughter!reader #lo'ak x sister!reader #kiri x sister!reader #irma: 📝#📖: light

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hg-aneh · 4 months

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Yo, I don't know if you know this but your work is being posted on Pinterest

I sort of knew but never really cared about it until now-?

-lots of angry feed up whining below... and a bit of a breakdown-

Just a few hours ago I saw the comments on some of them and holy shit tiktok children are some of the most braindead individuals i have ever seen

I'm fine with reposts, and if I wasn't, I know I wouldn't be able to stop them

What's pissing me off rn is that my stuff is getting attention from *that* crowd, the booger eating snot nosed mocosos de mierda who are so privileged their main problems are "what's skrimblo skromblo doing now? omg is it problematic??? omg theyre like so evil 💀💀"

I- they're still fucking going with the Crowriel thing- How cool, how fun, totally not making me want to disappear again bc of all the trauma from that particular mess, nope, not at all

And the angel crowley x demon crowley thing- i swear to fucking god i- they're so dumb- they're so stupid- how is it incest you- they're the same person🙉🙉🙉🙉🙉🙉🙉🙉

I even saw some little shit saying "omg i used to like that artist until i found out they draw nsfw" ... WHAT IS HAPPENIGNJDNGKDBG??????¿?¿¿????¿

I swear I'm going insane, I wish I could take my shit away from those people, they're so-??????

Like I'm legit about to enter another joker era, I can't believe this is what fandom spaces are now, what is wrong with people

Sorry I'm using this as a vent post or whatever but honestly I'm tired of being subservient when it comes to these fucking people, at one point a bitch has gotta explode

"Why do you care so much about what ppl say abt you online"

Because I have Seen what happens when you shut up about it. You either address it indirectly or become tiktoklovr103892's punching bag, there's no in between. Each second of silence is an admission of guilt for these motherfuckers

And I know that at the end of the day it doesn't matter but bro just allow me to be emotional over having an online space where I can have fun and take a break from life, be riddled with people who I've seen talking like they're praying for my downfall

Seriously what the fuck

What. the fuck.

Now if you'll excuse me

#rant #vent #i fucking hate what fandom has become #aneh answers #aneh wont shut up #sorry again #this poor anon skgnkdhm

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number1jeonginstan · 5 months

Note

can you write about an au where when ppl meet/see their s/o they instantly feel like they need to consummate their bond? and seungmin meets y/n? (its fine if not tho)

A/N: Thank you for your request and sorry for it taking so long :( I really hope you enjoyed it! While writing this, I started getting an idea of making this into a series, so one for each member meeting their soulmate and stuff. I thought it would be neat, but I don’t really know if you guys want that or not, if you do, please tell me! ALSO, I told you guys I will be back on that writing grind (I always keep my promises!!)

WC: 2.6k

Minors don't interact, 18+

Pairing: College Student!Seungmin x afab! Reader

Warnings: kinda public sex, but not, unprotected sex (are we surprised?), cumming inside of op even though it was their first time, idk what else to add…

The air was thick outside, a light drizzle was hitting the ground as Jeongin and Seungmin were eating their lunch.

“Did you guys fuck?” Seungmin asked bluntly, dipping another fry in the ketchup in front of him. “You know we have to as soon as we touch, it’s so embarrassing though” Jeongin groaned. “How is it embarrassing? She now knows what your dick looks like and you guys can live happily ever after!” he chuckled as Jeongin took a sip of his milkshake.

“Dude, I don’t understand why we have to have sex as soon as we see our soulmate, the world is a twisted place. Like hypothetically, what if the dude is a virgin and the girl isn’t, or the dude has a micro? Even worse if they are both virgins, like imagine losing it to someone you don’t even know and then having to spend your entire life with them”

Seungmin just nodded along as Jeongin continued to go on and on. “Like think about it if I didn’t have sex with them, I would have a painful ass boner until we are either 100 miles apart or until I fuck her, not to mention, I can only have sex with them for the rest of our lives and we barely know each other.”

“I think you are reading too much into it, was she at least nice?”

“Yeah” Jeongin scratched the back of his neck “she was super sweet, I’m actually going to her place after this for a movie date”

“Awww, Innie is finally getting play, even though it is forceful”

Jeongin just rolled his eyes, popping another fry in his mouth. “I better get going, I don’t want to be late”

Seungmin watched him get out of their shared booth, only to almost run into someone and apologize. Seungmin just chuckled, knowing how clumsy his friend was, only to look up and see you.

He knew you from a few classes, you were also taking photography, but he didn’t believe it was your major seeing as you were only taking the required classes with him.

Jeongin profusely began apologizing, telling you he really didn’t mean it, you just giggled, telling him that everything was okay and it wasn’t your fault. As you turned around, you spotted Seungmin, and you stopped and looked at him for a second.

“You are Seungmin from my photography class right?” Seungmin was confused, he didn’t think that you knew him, let alone knew his name. “Oh um, yeah Professor Lee right?” he asked, trying to make it seem like he didn’t know exactly who you were.

“Yeah, I just wanted to say I love your work. When you showed us your portfolio, I was genuinely blown away. Like seriously, the way you capture the essence of everything around you is breathtaking.”

Seungmin could feel his ears getting redder, blushing slightly at the way you described his photos. No one had ever admired them the way you were describing them at that moment. “Thank you so much” he stuttered slightly, still a bit embarrassed.

“That actually leads me to my question,” you said, picking at your nails slightly. “Oh? What’s your question?” He asked, placing his chin in the palm of his hands, trying to show to you that you had his full attention.

“I’m a Journalism major, and I’m trying to work on my photography so I can better capture the essence of what’s going on at that moment in time. That’s why I’m minoring in it, but I feel like I’m just not there. Like sure, I have the camera and everything, but I feel like I’m not conveying the feeling or emotions of the event like you do, so I was going to ask if you could help me?”

You rocked back and forth on your heels waiting for his response, and he simply nodded “Yeah, I would love to help you”

You grinned “Um, do you want to give me your number, or I can give you mine so we can figure out a time if that’s okay, or if you don’t want to give me yours we can always meet up after class” you continued to ramble on.

“Give me your phone, I’ll put in my number and just text me right now so I can make sure it went through”

You simply nodded, handing him your phone. He put in his number, sending a text from your phone to his.

“See, I got it,” he said, holding up his own phone. “Why don’t I text you when I’m free and we can coordinate from there!”

“Thank you so much Seungmin, like seriously, I really appreciate it!”

Just before he could reply, your friend that you were with called you over to your booth, causing you to wave him goodbye and run over to her.

“Who was that?” she asked you, looking over the menu in front of her.

“He’s this really cute dude from my photography class, he said he would help me so I can take better pictures” You grinned to yourself, you had finally got the boy's number you had been fawning over for the semester.

10:21 PM

Hey, it’s Seungmin Wait, you already know that You know what, ignore the first two texts And that one And that one Shit. Ummm I just wanted to say that I am free tomorrow at 2 pm if that works with you. If not, that’s totally fine, we can find another time Anyway, have a good night!

You giggled at the texts he had just sent you, something about him being flustered over text made you so happy.

Seungmin rolled around in anguish waiting for your text, he wanted to know your thoughts. Maybe you thought he was crazy sending all those texts and ghosted him or no longer wanted his help. He was about to give up and go to sleep until he got your text.

10:34 PM

Oh hey Seungmin! Yeah, I think 2 works for me! I’ll bring my camera and stuff, and I’ll text you a good location Also, text me your coffee order, I’ll bring you some

He felt like a schoolgirl with a crush. You were so cute, asking for his coffee order, he just wanted to pinch your cheeks, but that would be weird, right? You guys barely knew each other, he would just watch over you in class and that’s all.

It was the afternoon and you had set up your camera. You had found this abandoned field a few months ago while just walking around listening to music. You thought it was the perfect spot to practice taking pictures with more emotion.

You had placed a picnic blanket in the grass big enough to fit 4 people as well as a blanket since it was getting cooler and you didn’t know how long you guys would be there.

You were waiting for Seungmin, the ice in his Americano slowly melting, the condensation slowly making the cup wetter. When your phone finally showed 2:05, Seungmin showed up. While you were wearing jeans, a white blouse, and a sweater with apples all over it, he was dressed in jeans, a white t-shirt, and a flannel.

“Sorry I’m a little late, I was trying to find this place,” he said, placing his camera bag onto the blanket. He took a step back, fully looking around taking in the view. “How did you find this place? It’s secluded, but absolutely stunning”

“I was just walking around one day and stumbled over this spot”

You handed him his iced americano, and he took it from your hands graciously. “So, I was thinking that we should practice different emotions, but the same scene, so why don’t we do that?” He took a sip of his drink and then placed it back on the grass.

You simply nodded, getting your camera, and waiting for his instructions. He turned to you and pointed in front of him. It was just some dandelions, it was nothing special, but he went on to explain.

“Dandelions are one of the very few plants that can grow anywhere and everywhere. Some might see them as a weed, but others may see them as a beautiful flowers that can withstand thousands of weather conditions. Now, think about what you want it to look like as you take the picture”

You did as he said, trying to fully understand the flower in front of you. You took the picture with the intent you had in mind, and you did it. The flower looked bright and powerful compared to the grass that surrounded it.

“Seungmin I did it!” you jumped up and down, showing him the hug. Before he could react, you gave him a hug, trying to express your gratitude. As you pulled away, it was like a switch had flipped in you.

For some reason, you could feel yourself get wetter. It was something you had never felt before, it felt uncomfortable, and the only thing you could feel was lust. The same was for Seungmin, all he could feel himself get hard the second you touched him. It wasn’t even just a random hard-on, but it felt so painful like he had to cum that second or else he would die.

“Seungmin, do you also feel that way?” You asked, feeling a bit scared, but your entire body was tingling like there was no other sensation. You could feel your wetness slowly drip down your thighs and there was no stopping it. “Yeah, fuck, I think it does”

“Can I please?” he groaned, he couldn’t bear the feeling of not being next to you, on top of you, inside of you. It’s like he could smell your wetness and had to indulge himself in it or else he would die. “Wait, I don’t have a condom, I don’t think we should”

Before he could even continue speaking, you stopped him, shutting him up by kissing his lips. “If you don’t fuck me right now, I think I might just explode”

You continued to kiss him, taking off your own sweater and pants, leaving you just in your blouse and underwear as he took off his flannel and pants. “But, what if?”

You stopped him, “I’m clean and am on birth control, if you are clean too then what’s stopping us? The only way this sensation will stop is if we are a hundred miles away from each other and that will take hours, so please just fuck me”

He groaned, going back to attacking your lips. He laid you on the picnic blanket you had brought, thanking your prior self for bringing it. He moved down to your neck, to the curve of your breasts as he continued to kiss them, pulling down the strap of your bra and blouse in one tug to give him access to your breast.

He began to tease your nipple, pinching it with his finger as he began to bite marks on your neck, claiming you as his. “Seungmin please stop teasing, I need to feel you in me right now”

That was all he needed, he pulled his shirt off, throwing it somewhere in the distance as well as his boxers. His cock was long, slightly thick, with two veins at the underside of it. You could feel your mouth water as he began to smear the pre-cum leaking from his tip onto the rest of his throbbing cock.

“Fuck baby, look at what you did to me just with a hug” he groaned. “I could say the same for me,” you said, pulling down your underwear to show your soaked core.

He looked at your pussy in awe, you were so wet he could easily slip in with no prep. “Fuck, so wet just for me”

You just nodded, playing with your clit, trying to give yourself some sort of stimulation. “Please Minnie, need your cock so bad” you pleaded, your doe eyes looking up at him. Before he could even register what he was doing, he aligned the tip of his cock, with your hole, slowly putting his cock inside of you.

You moaned at the sensation, you had never felt so full in your life. Once he had fully sheathed his cock inside of you, he let out a long and sultry moan. “Fuck baby, this pussy is everything”

Before you could moan in response, he began to fuck you like there was no tomorrow. Your legs wrapped around him, wanting to feel him hit that spot inside of you. “Fuck baby, fuck Minnie you feel so good” you moaned.

He lifted your hips slightly, causing him to hit that one spot inside of you. “Oh fuck, fuck, fuuuuuck” you babbled, feeling so close.

He could feel your walls tighten around his cock, he could tell you were close, so he brought his hand down to your clit, slowly circling it in tandem with his thrusts. That was all you needed to cum.

You came screaming his name, your legs wrapping tighter around him, not wanting him to stop thrusting into you. “Fuck baby, if you keep doing that, I’m going to cum inside, please let me go” he whined.

You didn’t budge, feeling slightly overstimulated, but that didn’t stop you from begging him to cum inside of you, to fill you with his cum. That was all he needed to reach his peak, his load shooting inside of you, causing you to cum once again, your walls milking him dry.

He slowly pulled out of you, covering you with the blanket you had brought and wrapping his arms around you.

You were both covered by the second blanket you had brought. You were thankful for it, it was shielding the both of you from the cool air that would be nipping your skin if you didn’t.

“Who would have thought the dude I was looking at all of class for the past semester was actually my soulmate?” You said out loud, your head buried into his chest.

He cocked his head slightly to look at you. “What do you mean, I was looking at you in class all the time, I never saw you looking at me?”

You turned your head up to look at him “So we are both idiots who could have done this earlier if we actually talked to one another?” You asked, giggling a bit about how stupid the two of you were.

“Yeah, I guess so” he chuckled back, placing a kiss on your head. “Shit, my friends are going to tease me relentlessly for this, fucking my soulmate in the middle of a field” He groaned out loud.

“You guys tell each other when you meet your soulmate?” you asked, a bit confused

“Yeah, we have a group chat, Jeongin was the first to find his and now I’m second, I wonder how the rest of them are going to find theirs”

“You should invite me to them,” you said, kissing his lips once again.

“Baby, if I didn’t they would have kidnapped you and introduced themselves to you”

You just laughed, running your fingers along his face. “Now that we have gotten over the whole “need to fuck like bunnies” how about we do this again?”

Before Seungmin could even realize what you meant, you slowly moved on top of him, slipping his already-hardened cock into your soaking pussy.

“Fuck baby, I’m always ready for round two,” He said, groaning at the way your walls clenched his cock, you were made for him.

#stray kids #skz #straykids x reader #skz smut #ju <3 answers #straykids smut #ju <3 writes #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids smut #seungmin #seungmin skz #seungmin x reader smut #seungmin x reader #seungmin smut #ju's <3 anons

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naneun-no · 3 months

Text

From my drafts so it’s late but:

Today’s delulu thought is that Standing Next to You has too many lyrical coincidences to not be about Jimin.

🫣 I SAID IT WAS DELUSIONAL OKAY

You are free to disagree. You probably should 🤣

I mean we know it wasn’t written by Jung Kook but obviously the version he recorded was arranged with and for JK, and “leave your body golden” can’t be a coincidence right? Like it’s the whole ass album name, plus a word that carries connotations of JK himself, which the ppl who worked with him on Seven must have known.

So if that wasn’t a coincidence… then what about:

1. “How we left and right is something we control” — a callback to both Left and Right by CP feat JK, but also a nod to Butter, a massive BTS hit and a song that he performs alongside his boyfie bestie JM.

2. “When it’s deep like DNA, something they can’t take away” — a callback to another massive BTS hit, interesting. And *delulu warning* also reminds me of JM and JK’s extreme similarities that they themselves have referred to before?? They’re wired the same, they have the same sense of humor, they live and breathe for the same shit and even though they have some very key differences, they really do seem like twin flames (even if you just see it as platonic). They are similar in ways that seem braided into the fibers of their being. Like, in their DNA 🧬 some may say. *delulu warning #2* I’m also reminded of Jimin’s Letter lyrics: “After all this time has passed will we still be the same? Just like we were when we first met.”

Also, “something they can’t take away” is an interesting turn of phrase… more on that later.

3. Okay the real meaty part:

Screaming I’ll testify that we'll survive the test of time, they can't deny our love. They can't divide us, we'll survive the test of time I promise I'll be right here

[I seriously can’t believe how closeted-couple-coded this song is]

First off, again with the Letter lyrics mirrored here with the “test of time.” Then it’s got all this drama about being ripped apart and how it won’t happen and how they’ll be next to each other no matter what and that they have “something they can’t take away.”

Not only does all that line up with other Letter lyrics, but it is so goddamn dramatic and for what?

Be for real, what straight couple in this day and age would have this much working against them?? The only possible explanations are: 1) within the fantasy world of a song I suppose this could be some sort of Romeo and Juliet/West Side Story motif, and to be fair the music video did have a kind of rival gang/crime family look to it? Sort of? With the men fighting below the stage? Idk. Or it could be 2) the fact that idols do in fact often have to hide even their straight relationships, which is wild to me. But I know it’s a thing, so. I suppose there’s that. JK doesn’t seem the type though honestly. I think he’d be even more open about it than V.

On the other hand, the lyrics seem SO fit for a couple who are a) queer, b) closeted, c) currently in/about to be in a legislatively homophobic military and country (am I saying that right? Lol) and d) internationally famous pop idols in the SAME BAND who are both widely regarded as heterosexual sex symbols and would be shunned by many people in their homeland AND internationally if their queerness were to be revealed, much less if they were truly an item and THAT news broke.

Whew. That was a lot but like… that would be a real example of a relationship that would be VERY threatened by outside forces plotting against them and trying to separate them. Not JK and a hot blonde model, not him and a Korean actress, not basically any other scenario but a queer relationship.

Idk I know he didn’t write it but like ??? What the hell is that theme? I’m dying to get inside the mind of the people who DID write it, because are they or are they jikookers at this point like?!

4. Just for fun I’ll also point out the “leave your body golden like the sun and moon” 😏 like. Okay. At this point the songwriters are watching Jikook compilations, drooling over @slaaverin edits like convince me they’re not. CONVINCE ME.

5. “Deeper than the rain”?! “The pain”?! Alright I’m not even serious at this point but ??? Rainy day fight 🌧️?!?! 🤣🤣

6. “Standing next to you” oh you mean like… for 18 months? In a companion enlistment program? Like that?

Alright alright I’m done but you get my point. What even is this song if not an anthem of jikookery?! It’s more on-the-nose than Letter, more sneaky than Still With You. It wasn’t written by JK but at this point I’m calling that the songwriters are as delulu as me.

Hope y’all are well. If you made it to the end of this thank you for donning your tinfoil hat with me and I hope you at least got a giggle.

✌️

#jikook #kookmin #jimin and jungkook #jikook theories #delulu time

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fuwaprince · 4 months

Text

👉👈 Hi friends! I have a long, serious post made just for you(!) that isn't full of spoilers, smut or mooning lawn gnomes. Please read if you can, this is a 💥 mutual aid request 💥

It has been a horribly painful and long while as most people following/keeping up with me know. and in a few days I'm going to be down $1500, which is basically all my fucking $

I can't afford Christmas for anybody, which sucks and I'm very sorry. I can't even take care of myself and haven't been, which also sucks and I'm very sorry

Landlords spontaneously raised rent on me more than halfway through this month as punishment for not getting to my house chores and not communicating, to be totally honest with you. I feel ashamed and awful about it but I didn't want to clean the place while multiple ppl living here had tested positive for COVID and kept walking around unmasked... I am not fully vaxxed because I've been too depressed to get any kind of necessary medical care done and I didn't want to catch COVID in the middle of my finals week for the semester. I woke up to being angrily and rudely bitched at first thing after the last of my finals (I passed at least). It wasn't a humanizing text. Fuck the mistreatment though. Rent is now almost doubled and it won't be lowered

There was no room for negotiation and I truly believe they've resorted to pricing me out of living here because the group of renters psychologically tormenting me wasn't effective (actually- putting a picture of my rapist on the fridge rly was super effective in getting me to isolate myself in my room all day and so was outing me as trans to the transphobic ass neighbors.... But I didn't and still don't have any place better to move out to, like the way they were hoping I would. Yes, I have looked and BEGGED btw)

I want out of here NOW, but I can't leave. I tried and had to come back because it was the best option. I can't afford to stay in a motel/hotel/BnB just to get away from them for a day or two during Christmas. I don't have any friends who I can spend the holiday with either. During the semester, I resorted to convincing classmates with keys to locked buildings to let me crash in them while they worked at night and I would leave before anybody showed up. Now that school is out, I can't do that. I don't have any family I can reach out to for support or friends who I can depend on for immediate help. I have been crying day in and day out for weeks. I have records of it posted throughout my blog. Literally crying for days on end. I'm being so fucking transparent

All that lump of text is to explain to whoever is out there, who might be listening and willing and able, to please consider helping me, if and ONLY IF able. I know times are tough and if you'd rather use your $ for other reasons or just don't have any to spare, don't sweat it and take care! 🫂

I've thought about what I could do for a long time and have helped myself how I can. It isn't enough. I've applied for so much assistance. Been approved and been sabotaged by my inhumane mom (who does not love me) via stealing my legal documents and letters and hiding them for months. My mind jumps to grim places but I'm clinging for dear life to whatever hope I have left that says things will get better. I wish I knew somebody with a business that I could work for. Part of me feels so fucking terrible for asking for help because I feel like a waste of all your resources. I feel like I shouldn't ask, like I really do not fucking deserve help, but there are friends online who care, who I know mentioned being interested in helping in whatever ways they can

So to the people who care to seriously me, I'm ready to accept it: please send me nice words to get through this and feel less alone. It feels pathetic to ask but I would love a nice letter. A nice card even. Kind words of any kind would go a long way. It means more to me than food. I have felt so broken and every day feels like a test to figure out how badly I actually want to live

I'm also leaving my cash app and paypal here in case anybody would like to do more than what I'm comfortable asking but probably very likely will inevitably need very very soon. I will be left with fucking nothing and I will have no idea what to do once rent is paid

Thank you to those of you who have sent love, offered to listen and heard me out. I really wish it wasn't so hard to survive. I'm trying to feel better knowing there are people out there who are also without help and hoping the best, but it doesn't make me feel any better or comforted tbh. I just wish the help was there for us. I wish there was a place to go for spare love, care, compassion, empathy, kindness, humanity, generosity... I need that more than I need $. Call me stupid but that's what I live for. I don't live for paying to survive in terrible conditions. I live for love and to smile with friends

I hope to write back to the friends who have already been so kind as to message me soon btw. I'm sorry for not replying sooner. Your overwhelming support is sincerely sweet and sometimes I cry because I can't believe people are so nice (to me???). It'll give me something to do that doesn't make me feel like dying! :') so thank you thank you thank you *fist bump*

Hope you're all doing as well as you can and that somehow things get better. Hope anybody else struggling like me doesn't make the mistake of isolating like a sick and dying animal. You deserve love. You deserve support. Don't be like me. Have the courage to reach out to the people who care about you for help as early on into your emergency as possible. Don't let your situation snowball because you spend so long trying to figure out if you're worth it!!! This Random Tumblr user is here to tell you that YOU ARE. Sending my infinite everlasting unconditional love. Be nice to yourselves. Be nice to each other. Fuck the hateful assholes who wish I would just kill myself already. Tell your friends you love them. Happy Holidays!!!

And here's a single picture of a mooning lawn gnome at the very end, as a treat! I told you this post wasn't full of it.... It just ended with it 👉👉

#i decided i rather write a help post rather than a suicide note or my own obituary #sorry to ask for your attention AGAIN #mutual aid #important #help #i'm very sorry #mutuals can all kick my ass once for not abandoning me during these times #i wish i had a $ goal but i do not as of now #I'm taking it a day at a time #doing my very best and trying so damn fucking hard.. please help #i rly would just like to escape and have my own tiny place one day.... some place i can live and love happily in #i was on the steets earlier this year and living out of my ex's car. i do not want to go back to that out of desperation #i have been through so much just trying to survive in place where i don't feel like i belong or welcomes me #i need help #babbling

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poisonedprose · 11 months

Note

ellie who can’t stand to see her pretty girl cry :(

she, of all ppl, knows how difficult life is like this and she wishes so badly that she could take away every ounce of pain wracking your brain. but she can’t. you both know that. all she can do is love you the best she knows how. hug you and listen to you and kiss the tears off your face <3 and she hopes to god that it’s enough. that she’s enough.

i didn’t mean to make this so sad i just love her

₊˚✧ go ahead and cry little girl

ellie williams x fem!reader

warnings: 1k words, death/murder talk, established relationship, cursing, crying obvi, hurt/comfort, pet names (babe, pretty girl, honey, sweet girl)

masterlists

It wasn't often that you cried, choosing to hold a strong persona in front of people. You being the one that people went to for comfort, never the other way around. You were fine and content with that. Truthfully, that's the ideal situation for you.

You struggled with your emotions, never being brought up where feelings were a good thing. Even though you were surrounded by people who practically preached how feelings were good, you still stayed in your shell. Choosing to not be a so-called 'burden.'

But when Joel yelled at you for being so reckless on patrol you couldn't help but excuse yourself quickly to seek shelter in the comfort of your bed. It was an accident, but Joel took things like this seriously. You weren't dumb, you knew every time someone fucked up someone else's life was on the line. And today, it was Ellie's life that just so happened to be on the line.

You had overlooked a certain part of the area you were exploring, giving Ellie the okay to talk normally again. Unfortunately, you overlooked one silent clicker that seemed to come out of nowhere. It probably would have ripped Ellie's head off if Joel hadn't arrived just in time. It's not that you didn't try to help, you did. Your gun was out of ammo and you were trying your quickest to reload it as soon as possible, but your hands were just too shaky from the fright of your girlfriend possibly being eaten alive.

It seemed like it was just one mistake after another. Ellie was quick to forgive you, admitting it was just an honest mistake and it could have easily been her in your situation. Joel, on the other hand, was fuming. You had honestly never seen him so mad. You didn't say anything but an apology, knowing he was probably just as scared as you were.

It didn't mean, it didn't hurt though. You knew you deserved it, but you still couldn't help the burning feeling in the back of your throat and the way your lip trembled ever so slightly. You excused yourself quietly, Joel muttered something about how you were taking the easy way out followed by Ellie telling him to lay off.

The wind was cold on your face in contrast to the hot, salty tears that began to stain your face. Your arms were stuffed close to your chest, crossed with your hands under your armpits. You tried your best to keep your sobs quiet as to not alert anyone. Most of the people who resided in Jackson were at the movie night that was being held, so you didn't have to worry about many people seeing you.

You could feel your heart drop when you heard your name being called in the distance. You quickly untuck your arms and rubbed the tears off your face with whatever you could, your hands, your sleeves, whatever. "Hey, babe, don't listen to Joel. He's just angry." Ellie spoke as she came up behind you, waiting for you to turn around, but you never did. "Babe?" She stepped to the side of you, trying to look at your face and it didn't take a genius to notice you were crying.

To be honest, Ellie didn't know what to do. She'd comforted a bunch of people before. Dina, Cat, Jesse (believe it or not), and even Joel, but never you. Hearing your small sniffles was enough to break her heart. "Hey," Her voice was soft but not patronizing. She wrapped her arms around you, offering a hug for comfort. She rested her chin on the top of your head and your tears just flowed more.

You tried to stop yourself, you tried telling yourself that Joel was just upset and that he didn't mean his harsh words even if you might have deserved them, but now it was about more than just Joel. It was Joel's words, it was Ellie almost dying, it was everything that you said that wasn't a big deal but it was.

"Shhh. You're okay." Her hand stroked your hair, trying to offer you any comfort that she could. "I'm okay, everyone's okay. Okay?" She swallowed thickly as she listened to the sound of your wretched sobs. "Come on, pretty girl, stop crying." She kissed the top of your head a few times before gently pushing you off her chest so she could look at you.

"'M sorry." You hiccuped as she wiped away the tears that continued to fall with her thumbs. "Don't apologize." She shook her head, almost annoyed that those words even made it out of your mouth for having a human reaction. You shook your head in return, knowing that she didn't quite get what you meant.

"'M sorry that I didn't see the clicker." Still, Ellie just shook her head as she held your face in her hands, and a new crack in her heart formed with every tear that fell. "Honey, it's not your fault, okay? The only reason you should be apologizing is if that was just an elaborate plan to get rid of me and it didn't work." She felt relieved once she heard your sweet laugh.

She knew you were going to be okay, that you were strong enough to pick yourself up if you needed to but she was glad she was here. She was glad she could wipe the tears off your face as she told you dumb jokes to make you laugh. "You okay, sweet girl?" She whispered as she kissed your cheeks, or as she would call it, kissing the tears off your face.

"I will be if you're here." She rolled her eyes at the cheesiness but there was a relieved feeling in her chest that she was actually helping you feel even the slightest bit better. "Cringe." She whispered before leaning down to kiss your salty, tear-stained lips with her hands snaking around your waist. "You love it, Williams." You returned the kiss, tasting the saltiness on your lips. "Yeah, I guess I do, huh."

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎┊ㅤㅤ 🌾 ㅤㅤ ﾟㅤㅤ ┊

#! ☢ ₊˚✧ tlou .#I LOVE THIS REQ #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #the last of us #the last of us x reader #tlou #tlou x reader

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personasintro · 1 year

Text

One Time Thing | 01

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; what are you going to do when your best friend asks you to have sex with her boyfriend?

⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jimin x reader

⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: best friend's boyfriend au, angst, fluff, smut

⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language, oral sex (f.), protected sex, breast play

⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫�� 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7k+

𝐚/𝐧: I've decided to rewrite and repost this entire series. It's one of my first series on this blog, have been put on-hold for the longest time ever. It still is... not gonna lie, rewriting this story brought me mixed feelings about this. I'm not sure if it's worth posting and writing – so please if you like this story let me know! The future of this story depends on you (literally) because I've been thinking about deleting it. I'm just not sure if ppl will like it, so if you do please let me know. Don't ask me how I came up with this story idea lmao I don't even know but I always come out with the weirdest ideas ever.

𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢ (links to be added)

“What?!”

The scream rips out of your throat, loud enough to make your best friend cringe at the loudness of your tone. But you don't care. You don't seem to focus enough to care. No other words leaving your mouth while you stare completely shocked at her. You just can't seem to believe what she just said. Your rapidly beating heart says it all.

No, you must've heard her wrong. She definitely didn't say it and you misunderstood her. That's right. But then she speaks again, repeating her once said words that make you stop breathing.

“I want you to sleep with my boyfriend.” she says like it's nothing. She makes it sound as if she’s asking you to water her plants or some other dumb request.

“What the fuck?!” Horrified by her words, you scream again. “Oh my god. I know what’s happening.” you say with a hand over your chest, where you can feel every beat your heart makes.

“You know?” she asks, genuinely surprised with her eyebrows raised.

You nod. “You’re pranking me, aren’t you? It’s because I gave you vodka instead of water you asked for that one time. You’re pranking me back.” you laugh as you shake your head.

She looks at you dumbfounded looking at your crazy state. You're laughing like a maniac, wiping your non-existed tears as she only stares.

“Woah, you almost got me!”

“I’m not pranking you, Y/N. I’m serious.” she says with an absolutely serious face expression.

Your smile drops as you check her face. There's a beat of silence. You've never been more confused than you're now. Nevertheless, you still wait for her abrupt laugh, telling I got you or anything that could prove her prank worked. But she doesn’t. In fact, she doesn't do anything as her features twist into a slight worry. She isn’t the type to prank anyone anyway. Staring right back at her, you find nothing but seriousness and that's when you know.

She’s telling the truth. This is no prank.

“W-wait... are you serious?”

“Hundred percent yes. Let me explain this to you. I know it sounds crazy.”

“You think? This is the craziest shit you’ve ever said and you said a ton of it.” you deadpan, ignoring her silent laugh.

“I know this sounds really crazy and you’re probably thinking what the fuck did I just tell you...” she trails off but then suddenly laughs once she has a perfect view of your wide eyes and open mouth. What the hell is she on? Has she been doing drugs?

“I-I don’t get it.”

“Well, the thing is.. me and Jimin haven’t been really sexually active.” she starts explaining, your head shaking in a shock.

“I still don’t get it.” you interrupt her, causing her to roll her eyes while silently telling you to shut up with her expression.

“If you would just shut up and listen to me.”

“Okay I’m really curious how you’ll explain this.” you remark.

“We haven’t had sex for like months. Since I’m on birth control, I don’t know why but I don’t really want to have sex. The thing is I get horny but not to the point I want to act on it. I already tried to consult with my gynecologist but she just told me it’s completely normal for me to feel this way and that it has something to do with hormones or whatever,” she explains, not forgetting to roll her eyes as she sighs before continuing.

“She told me it’ll stop eventually. I already tried different birth controls. Jimin suggested I should stop using it but I don’t want to get knocked up. I feel much safer with birth control. But lately... we’ve been having these arguments about it. I kind of lashed out at him telling him he can fuck whoever he wants and I wouldn’t care. I’d just get so annoyed everytime he wanted to have sex. And I feel so bad because it’s not Jimin’s fault. I should be able to please him but blowjobs don't cut it this time. It’s just not enough.”

You blink, trying to let her words sink in. Once you get yourself together, at least enough to process her words, you lick your lips.

“But sex isn’t everything. You love each other so much and your relationship shouldn’t be based on sex.” you say truthfully while looking at her saddened face.

Now that the shock is fading away, you realize she's absolutely serious and this goes much deeper than you thought. All of this makes her frustrated.

“I know. Jimin is the kindest person I know. He told me that it’s okay and we don’t have to have sex but I know how much sexually frustrated he is. I feel like I’m such a bad girlfriend. After our argument we had this long conversation about it and then I was kind of thinking about you,” she says, her eyes nervously flicking to yours as you blink at her with a terrified look. “ You haven’t gotten laid in a long time always complaining how you’re not interested in having sex with a complete stranger. And I know you mentioned Jimin’s hot in the past so..”

“So what? You want me to have sex with him just because I said he’s hot? I said that about tons of men already.” And she doesn't see you having sex with all of them.

“Yeah but he thinks you’re hot as well.”

“What?”

What did she say? She has shocked you already too much today. You swear you're about to have a heart attack.

“He told me before we got into a relationship.”

That’s right. Mina and Jimin started as friends with benefits. They still slept with other people but after some time they became exclusive. After that they started dating and here they are. In a relationship completely in love.

“The thing is I know that you’re one of the kindest people I know. You always had my back and helped me with everything and I’m so grateful for you! And I know that you’ll not catch any feelings for Jimin.”

“I’m not that sexually frustrated that I need to have sex with your boyfriend. That’s ridiculous.” you say, sounding almost offended. “I barely know him.”

It's true. There are a few occasions where you and him see each other. Most of them happen at Mina's place and he happened to come there while you were there as well. It's not like you and him haven't talked. You do talk – casually but that's it. Nothing more. Plus, you're already busy with school and the only person you get to hang out in your free time is Mina. And Mina only. Well, there's Yoongi too – your other very close friend.

You could probably count on your fingers how many conversations you've had with Jimin. Not many, that's for sure. Most of the stuff you know about him is from Mina anyway. It's not like Jimin shares his personal life with you.

“That’s why it wouldn’t be so weird.” she says and you look at her completely dumbfounded by her words. Is she high? “I know it doesn’t make any sense right now.”

“I’m still shocked this isn't a prank.” you admit while you play with your nails. “Won’t you be jealous knowing me and Jimin are having sex?” The sudden thought crosses your mind. Not that you're seriously considering this stupid plan of hers!

“It’s just a one time thing. And no. I already told you how desperate I am. I need your help but I know how weird of me it is to ask you of this. You don’t have to do it. I’ll completely understand you. But you’re the only person I trust with Jimin.”

“B-but what about him? Isn’t this weird for him too?”

“Actually he had a pretty much similar reaction to yours when I first proposed this. He was hesitating about this but then he agreed to it.”

“I-I don’t know what to say to be honest.”

“Here, drink this.” she says, giving you your cup of tea she made for you. “I know you probably need something stronger than tea.” She tries to joke.

“Damn right. I could use a bottle of vodka right now.” you mumble before you take a few sips of your tea which by the way – doesn't calm your nerves. Not even one bit.

It feels like your head is about to blow up. Never in a million years you've imagined Mina would come for help about something like this. You do appreciate that she shares such a personal matter with you. But you're still not quite sure why she wants you to help. Sure, she explained herself and you're not dumb to not notice how much this truly frustrates you. But still. This has to be the dumbest ask of help you've ever experienced.

Averting your gaze elsewhere, your mind goes spiral and your thoughts wander to the mentioned man.

Jimin is handsome. There’s no secret in that.

You remember the first time you saw him. It was at a party and your mouth dropped once you were met at his sharp jaw, black hair and thick lips. All of these features make him mesmerizing and unique. After the party, you saw him in your art class but you've never talked to each other during it. He remained this mysterious guy everyone was looking and drooling at. Only if you would've known him a little bit more, you could've said you had a tiny crush on him. But can you say you had it? You didn't even know his full name back then.

And then Mina met him.

Somehow they bumped into each other and soon enough, they started to have this weird friends-with-benefits relationship. You've never drooled at him anymore. It didn't feel appropriate. Not when your best friend was having sex with him at any opportunity. It felt weird to think about him that way. Of course, he never stopped being a hot piece of man – you're not blind. You've blocked every nearly inappropriate thought of him.

Mina's voice cuts off your thoughts of her boyfriend.

“I don’t want you to feel like you have to do this. Not at all. I’m okay with whatever answer you’ll give me. I just had to try this with you because I’m so desperate. It’s been months since we had sex.” Her eyes turn glossy, sounding just as desperate as she says she is.

Knowing your best friend you're aware that this is something deep. This really must’ve bothered her when she came with this to you. She wouldn’t ask this of anyone else. Not when she’s completely in love with Jimin.

Have you ever imagined having sex with Jimin? Yes.

But do you still want it when he’s your best friend’s boyfriend? Not so sure anymore.

That sounds completely fucked up. Even if she seems to be okay with it.

Even when you don't want to admit it – Mina was right. You haven’t had sex for couple of months as well. You just didn’t want to hook up with someone you don't know, even if there were many opportunities for you to do so. You've always been picky about your taste and sex partners.

The last time you had sex was with your ex and that’s it. You've never had sex with someone who you weren’t dating with. It just wasn’t your thing. Still isn't.

What should you do? The decision is up to you. You could simply tell her no and then you would never have to talk about this again. But the desperation filling her face and the lack of sex in your life beg to differ. There's seriously something wrong with you because you catch yourself considering this. As if it already wasn't enough, Jimin's plump lips make their way into your brain. Argh! There's undeniable guilt pinching deep inside your chest because you're thinking about his lips when he's Mina's boyfriend. You can't help it.

Just the thought of seeing Jimin naked and feeling his skin against yours makes your skin hot already. Mina has opened the closed door now. Under different circumstances, you would've never dared to think of Jimin like this. Not anymore.

The lack of excitement and lust in your busy life is the cause of this. You suddenly start to imagine how this one time thing can be beneficial to all three of you.

Much to your surprise, you shock yourself and Mina when you mutter; “Okay, I’ll do it.”

Mina throws herself at you, clutching you to her body while you stay frozen, not being able to react in any way. You've no idea how this is going to go.

You are hoping you won’t regret your decision. This sounds already fucked up.

It takes only two days for Mina to set up a meeting with Jimin. You hate how businessy that sounds. Mina's idea consists of you and Jimin meeting somewhere alone, right before you jump straight to it. You're not sure if there's a point of getting to know each other a little bit better. However, she does have a point in making you two talk and make sure this is what you both want. You're not opposed to that. You definitely want to hear Jimin's opinion about this. Plus, Mina has never failed to remind you that you can back out whenever you want.

Even though you've tried to calm down your nerves and tried to tell yourself that this doesn't have to be any more awkward and weird than it already is – you just can't seem to shake off the nervosity flowing through your body. You're supposed to meet your best friend's boyfriend, talking about potentially hooking up together.

Mina gave Jimin your number which resulted in him texting you first. You don't think you could've made the first step. Not that it's required of you. It's them, well Mina, who came to you for help. As much as you'll get something out of this, potentially, they're the first ones who need help. It's not like you need one. All of this could be beneficial to you too.

Besides, you'll see how you and Jimin will get along and how the entire conversation will go.

You've agreed to meet at a local coffee shop, trying to keep it as casual as possible.

You wouldn't lie if you said you haven't considered backing out before even meeting Jimin. You're still not sure if you can face him and act all casual about this. In the end, you decide to keep your cool and at least try to see where all of this is going. Plus, you would feel bad for standing up Jimin. Or anyone who would be in his place.

Still, you nervously swallow as soon as you find Jimin sitting at a table, waiting for you. His phone is in his hand as he browses through it for a moment, just before he puts it back on the table and looks up. Your eyes lock shortly after and you realize there's no backing out now. You have to get there and meet him.

Maybe Jimin can sense your nervous state, or sees the way you hesitate but then he sends you a wide smile, waving you over. Gosh, you feel so weird. Not trying to block the entrance, you walk up to the table where he sits before you plop on the opposite side of him.

Seeing him this closer causes a lump to create in your throat. You're aware of his eyes on you as you pull out your phone out of the pocket of your jeans, trying to busy yourself before you have to truly face him. But all of this takes seconds and you're forced to lift your eyes up.

Brown hair parted in the middle, his eyes crinkle at the ends as he speaks softly; “Hi.”

It's been a while since you've heard him. Damn, you haven't seen him for weeks. That's if you don't count the art class you share. But even there, you barely paid any attention to each other.

“Hey,” you gulp, swallowing down the nervosity.

Before you can say anything more, the waitress comes to your table to take your orders. You order the first thing that crosses your mind which is a cherry tea. Jimin orders the exact same order looking slightly nervous. He doesn’t even look at the menu automatically saying 'same as her’.

“So,” he starts, chuckling and for the first time, you notice he's nervous too. “I don’t even know how to start. This is so weird.” he admits.

That makes you crack a grin.

“Tell me something about it. I thought I would run away as soon as I came here.” you laugh at yourself. Jimin joins your laughter, his top teeth sinking into his bottom juicy lip. God dammit.

“I’m going to be honest with you. I already know what my answer is and I’m not gonna change it. But if you feel like you want to back out you always can. I don’t want you to think this is something you have to do. Not for me or Mina. That’s our shit we pulled you into.” he says almost the exact same words as Mina. They both wanted you to know you don’t have to do this. And you know. God, you know - but you still want to do it.

“I know,” you smile at his caring gaze he is giving you. “But is this really something you want to do?” you ask just to be sure.

He smiles a little bit at your question. “I’m not going to lie. When Mina came to me with this idea I freaked out. But then it sounded kinda… good in some weirdest way possible. I love Mina but this is something we both agreed on.”

“Yeah, but like... I’m her best friend. Isn’t that weird?”

“It is. But I don’t really know you that much, no offense. I know you’re her best friend. She never shuts up about you but at the same time I don’t know you. No offense.” he says again, checking your reaction as if he's waiting for you to get offended.

“None taken.” you chuckle when he protectively puts his hands in front of him.

“So do you want to do this?” he asks, tone dropping lower as he stares into your eyes.

You bite your lip and without thinking you nod.

“Words. I need words Y/N.” Your name from his lips already sounds addicting.

“I do. I want this.” you speak softly, giving him the exact answer he wanted. He smirks a little bit, his sweet behavior changing to a cocky one for a bit.

You shake yourself out of the daze before it can erupt as you find your voice again.

“This is just a one time thing, right?”

“Of course.” he immediately agrees.

What kind of mess did you get yourself into?

It’s the D-day.

That sounds awful.

It’s time for you to have sex with Jimin. That sounds even more awful. You feel completely nauseous and nervous. But not in the way that makes you want to turn around. It probably sounds ridiculous and considering the situation and relationship between all three of you – you trust Jimin. You might not know him well enough, but he's familiar. He's no stranger. And from Mina's words back from the days they only hooked up, there is something to be excited for.

Which reminds you that Mina is working her shift, aware of you and Jimin hooking up today. You still can't believe she's fine with all of this and after numerous questions of whether she's sure of this or not, she has finally managed to convince you that yes, she is more than fine.

Since they relationship has started with sex, there's a chance that it's not important to their relationship that much anymore. You're not sure how they'll solve this in the future. Will Jimin fuck other girls?

Before you can burden your already ready-to-burst brain, you knock on Jimin's front door. Your jeans work as the best surface for you to wipe your sweaty hands against.

Why the hell are you constantly so nervous? Is it because you're about to have a sex for the first time in a while? Or is it because it's with Jimin out of all people? You're not sure.

The door opens and reveals Jimin.

He's wearing jeans with a black belt, with a matching black shirt tucked into them. He runs his fingers through his dark hair, exposing his forehead and brows to you as he shoots you a polite smile. “Hey.”

“Hi,” you almost stutter, but still give yourself a mental high-five for not stuttering.

Jimin eyes stay on your for a moment. He can probably see your nervous state. Hell, you aren’t even hiding it. You can’t but you wish you could.

“Please come in.” he says politely instead, moving to the side as he gives you a space for you to come in.

The moment you step inside, Jimin closing the door softly behind you, you note the scent of wood and something sweet. You can't put a finger on what it is, but it smells really nice.

Understandably, you've never been to his place. There wasn't any need to – let alone the opportunity. As you take off your shoes and let Jimin guide you deeper into his place, you silently take it in. You will give him points for a good taste in furniture and decoration. You're not sure what you've expected – not that you thought about what his place looks like – it still takes you by surprise. It's quite surprising seeing his home so beautiful. It's definitely modern with a personal touch of Jimin. Most men's homes are usually a big mess.

“Do you live alone?” you ask behind him, slowly following him.

“Yeah.”

“Don’t you feel alone here all by yourself?” you ask curiously once you stop in the living room. Jimin motions for you to sit on the white couch and you obey, seating yourself on the soft mattress.

“Mina is here most of the time, so no.” he answers.

Your movements stop for a moment at the mention of your best friend.

“Oh, sorry. I should not mention her right now.” he awkwardly scratches the back of his head as he gives you an apologetic look. He sits on the other end of the couch, looking more comfortable with his arm stretched over the headrest.

“Why not? She’s your girlfriend after all.” you say, shrugging your shoulders. You assure him that it's okay and there's no need for him to act like Mina is not existing. However, it is weird no matter what. The last thing you want to be reminded of before having sex is Mina. You already feel so fucking weird about this and him talking about your best friend doesn’t really help.

“She is but due to our circumstances it’s not fair to you,” he says, “Do you want anything to drink? Water, coffee? Maybe some alcohol?”

He wants you to feel as comfortable as you can. If giving you some alcohol would help, then so be it. You kindly shake your head though. “Nah, I’m good.”

He nods as awkward silence surrounds you. You both look at each other and suddenly start to laugh. “This is so awkward. Are we supposed to jump right into it?” you ask laughing at how ridiculous this situation is.

“I mean.. we could. I don’t mind.” he surprises you with his words. Especially how simply they fall out of his lips.

Staring at each other, something stirs deeply inside your stomach and you recognize the little excitement. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you smile. “I suppose we could.”

He offers you his hand which you gladly take. His hands clasps around yours without interweaving your fingers. He leads you into his bedroom which is even more beautiful than the living room. He has a massive bed at the end of his room. Two night tables on each side. Big closet with mirror opposite of it. You can see some art decorating his walls but it still looks minimal.

“A-are we.. you know.. in here?” Great, you've stuttered.

“You know. You can say it straight away you don’t have to sugarcoat it.” he chuckles a little bit while closing the door behind you.

“Fine. Are we gonna fuck here?” you ask straight away and look his way.

He has a little smirk on his plump lips which he licks.

“That’s how I like it,” he mumbles more to himself. “We could move to the living room or any place you’d like.” he suggests while your cheeks burn. Did he just implied you could fuck perhaps in the kitchen if you wanted to? He absolutely did.

“No, this is fine.” you say after a while. You are more fine with this actually. You just feel weird thinking this is where he and Mina sleep together.

“I know what you’re thinking. Me and Mina haven’t had sex for so long. But you already know that.”

How is he able to read you so well when he barely knows you? “That’s why I’m here.” you say quietly walking to his bed. You touch his silky sheets which must’ve cost fortune.

“Do you want to back out?” he asks suddenly. You turn around finding him staring at you with his dark eyes. His stare changes. He isn’t looking at you innocently and friendly like a few minutes ago. You can see one thing you were sure of. Lust.

You bite your lower lip shaking your head.

“Words, Y/N.” he speaks sternly. You immediately remember the day when you met at the coffee shop. He wants you to say it out loud.

“Fuck me, Jimin.” you speak loud enough for him to quickly walk up to you.

Grabbing your face he presses your lips together. Other than being in complete awe that Park Jimin is kissing you now, you hold yourself back from moaning when his delicious soft lips taste way better than you've ever imagined. Mina is damn lucky. Your lips melt together so fast and you can’t breathe. The build up frustration of the lack of sex – on both parts – seem to get the best of you. Once Jimin pulls away to catch his breath, you both breathe heavily as he doesn't move away, pressing his forehead to yours instead. Your breath catches in your throat from the close proximity. You can smell his aftershave and fragrance that practically oozes from him. Not just that but the raunchy sex appeal as well. His lips taste like a cherry lip balm and there are traces of mouthwash on his tongue.

You wonder if this isn’t weird for Jimin. Kissing you while his girlfriend is away and she knows about this. This is so fucking weird but you can’t help yourself and kiss him again despite the lack of your oxygen. You don't know what gets to you. It's probably desperation. You don't want to talk about who he truly is. You don't want to think about Mina. You're doing this to enjoy this. You will treat him as he's just a normal guy, with no attachments to you or anyone you know.

Pushing him against his chest, he lets you push him down onto the mattress. He smirks at the dominance. You're trying to stay unaffected as you climb onto his lap. He lets you, hands hovering over your hips before he holds you there. The moment you sit down, your mouth opens once you can tell his cock is hardening. The bulge in his jeans is not that hard to notice now.

It's not like you're not wet. Fuck, you're dripping wet – you can already tell the discomfort between your legs. What you find ridiculous though, is the fact that you're not sure you've ever been this aroused and wet for your ex boyfriend.

He's barely touching you and your whole body is on fire, desperate to tear his clothes off to see what he's hiding beneath them. Jimin stares up at you, the little smirk still playing on his lips as he squeezes your hips. You start kissing his jaw and neck, inhaling secretly his scent again while you're careful not to leave any marks. A visible proof of what you're about to do – what you're already doing – is not something Mina should see. Even if she knows. You would feel like a complete idiot if she had to see Jimin and find any marks on her boyfriend.

Going back to his face and lps, you connect them again in a heated kiss even though you don’t want to kiss too much. Well, not that you don't want to but you're not sure if it seems right. After all – kissing is too intimate but you can’t help it. His lips are so addicting you always have to dive for another taste.

Your body screams for more, so you slowly grind yourself against his bulge. Throwing your head back at the sudden friction and slight relief it brings, you can't believe you're fucking doing this. Jimin is not unaffected either, he grunts as he squeezes your hips tighter, all while he helps you grind against him. He puts more pressure, leaving both of you gasping.

“Fucking hell.” he moans loudly, embarrassed how quickly out of control he is.

But you're too oblivious to his inner embarrassment, having no idea what he's been through despite Mina letting you the main problem. The truth is, his hand doesn't do its job anymore. Jerking off in the mornings or in the shower is not thrilling anymore. Not when he has a beautiful girlfriend, whom he has wanted to touch everytime she just laid beside him only in her underwear. He knows the lack of sex has made his hormones go crazy. That's understandable. It's not like he sees her as a sexual object, not at all. He was completely fine with the occasional blowjobs or handjobs (when she didn't want to mess up her make-up). But the truth is, sex might not be the most important part or thing in their relationship, it's still a key to a healthy relationship in some way.

And he did touch her. Sometimes. But it was more of him waiting for her to lash out at him. He is walking on eggshells when it comes to her. That eventually made both of them frustrated in their own ways.

He wanted to fuck his girlfriend so many times, but she was never in the mood.

But here you are. Grinding on his cock, looking like a perfect mixture of angel and devil at the same time. All of a sudden, he halts your movements and is met with your confused eyes.

“Okay you had your fun.” he chuckles deeply, biting harshly on his lower lip when he feels his hard cock poking you at your clothed entrance. You look just as fucked out, but you still find yourself to ask.

“Do you want to stop?”

“Fuck no,” he replies immediately. You are ready to laugh at that, but the only sound leaving your lips is yelping when he turns you over. He smirks when he sees your surprised stare by the sudden movement and how easily he has managed to flip you over. “My turn.” he rasps, diving his head to your neck.

Jimin mimics your movements from earlier. You suddenly feel him sucking your skin, too fucked out to tell him to stop. You don’t mind it. You find it so hot. You find him so hot.

“Is it okay for me to undress you?” he asks with a soft tone and gaze.

“Go ahead.” you nod at him.

You see his sweet smile before his fingers work on your button and zipper. You help him undress your jeans leaving you in your shirt and white underwear. You see him biting his lower lip again before he continues to take off your shirt. You are left in your underwear in seconds. The white bralette is complimenting your breasts and Jimin feels like salivating at the pure sight. Fuck, he needs to get himself together.

Jimin is unaware that you've picked your best underwear set you have in your closet. As much as he's not aware how guilty you feel for trying for him. You wanted to look good for him. It’s not like you want to seduce him. You just wanted to look your best. You still don’t understand what Jimin sees in you, or more accurately, why he had agreed to do this with you.

It seems like he wants to say something but he stops himself before pulling your panties down to your ankles. He tosses them on the floor not caring where they’re going to end. His gaze is locked up at your spread legs. Insecurity is already crawling through your whole body. You are about to clasp your legs when he stops you. Giving you a small smile seconds before he opens his mouth.

“Can I go down on you?” he asks suddenly. You lift your head and look at him surprisingly.

He wants to eat you out? Well damn, you're shocked again. You thought you’ll just have sex and that’s it. No foreplay. Not that you're complaining.

“Yes.” The answer comes immediately. And then you feel hot breath where you most need him.

He licks your pussy, having a taste of you. You moan loudly, throwing your head back in pleasure. You arch your back wanting nothing more than to touch him. But you know better and grab silky sheets instead.

“Oh my god!” you moan when you feel his tongue at your hole before he presses further. “Fuck Jimin!” You feel yourself clenching around his tongue.

He fucks you with his tongue, his two fingers pressing against your clit. He has experience, that's for sure. All this time you've craved someone else's touch and now you're getting it. You're way more sensitive which makes your orgasm approach faster than ever. You don't want it to end. Grabbing Jimin's hair and pulling onto them gently, still careful not to hurt him, you give him a silent plea of stopping. But he still keeps going, feeling you getting close.

“Stop, Jimin.” you moan and he immediately pulls away.

Mouth drenched in your wetness, his worried eyes are on you just as you breathe heavily, ignoring the feeling of disappointment your body feels. Your walls clench around nothing.

“Just fuck me. I can’t wait any longer.” you breathe, trying to calm down yourself. He immediately relaxes, something you notice just as he sits back on his knees.

“So greedy.” Chuckling he undresses himself.

You're watching his every movement while he watches your lustful gaze. He feel his chock twitching at your already fuck out state. You watch him pull his boxers off revealing his cock. You don’t know what you were expecting but damn is he thick. Knowing it's been a while since you've had sex, you wonder if he's going to fit.

“You mentioned you’re clean, right?” he asks, suddenly stroking his cock casually. You remember your conversation you had in the coffee shop. You both got tested and you’re both clean.

“Are you ready?” he asks for the last time.

You're about to nod, noticing the way he lifts up his brow as if he knew what you're about to do. Clearing your throat, you remember he wants to hear you.

“Yes.”

He chuckles at this knowing exactly what was going on inside your head.

He leans over you as he opens a drawer of his night stand. He pulls out a condom already ripping off the package. He gets back into his previous spot – he moves between your spread legs and puts the head of his cock at your entrance. “God, you’re so wet.” he says, almost fascinated.

You cringe at yourself when you find yourself almost saying just for you. He gathers some of the wetness onto his cock. He is about to tease you but god, you make it so hard for him. Spreaded in front of him like this completely naked. He says to himself little fuck it and slowly enters you. You want to squeeze your eyes shut but you don’t. You look at him through your hooded eyes. His eyes are closed and pleasure written all over his face.

“How are you this tight?” he grunts when he fills you to the brim. God, he's so thick. The words make you clench around him automatically. “You good? Can I move?” he almost begs but still stops to make sure you’re okay with this.

“Yeah, move. Please.” you whimper - the feeling of pain and pleasure becoming too much for you. You need him to move.

“As you wish, princess.” he suddenly says completely surprising you with the pet name. He probably got lost in the pleasure, you guess. And he does as he says.

He starts slowly but it feels like he can’t keep going slow as he fastens up his pace. His left hand grabs your hips so you wouldn’t move too much. His other hand takes one of your breasts, squeezing gently as his thumb brushes over your nipple.

“Have you been fucked like this?” He grunts, keeping his rapid pace. Moans escaping your lips. “I asked you something.” he growls pinching your nipple causing you to arch your back moaning loudly.

“No. No one fucked me like this.” You answer between moans grabbing his hand that's on your breast. You stare at the veiny hand, enough to make your eyes roll back. What a fucking sight.

“I’ll fuck you properly. Don’t worry.” he smirks and starts to go even rougher and faster. You don’t think that was even possible.

“Fuck.” you moan, aware of the loudness and momentarily, you think of his neighbors hearing you. All of it is gone when Jimin speaks through clenched teeth.

“Moan my name.” he gasps.

You hesitate, not sure what to do. But his hand leaves your hip and instead comes around your neck. Your eyes widen, walls tightening when he squeezes slightly. Not too much – you barely feel it.

“I said, moan my name Y/N.” he growls like some beast having you moan his name again and again. You feel your orgasm approaching still not wanting to cum. It’s too soon for you. You could go for hours like this. As much as embarrassing it is to admit.

“Cum for me, princess. Cum around my cock.” he keeps grunting from above you and the blissful sound of his moans makes you squeeze him tight. The knot suddenly rips and you're cumming around him, your entire body feeling light.

You feel him twitch inside you, giving you a few firm thrusts before his moves become sloppy. Big fuck leaving his lips as he spills inside the condom. Once he's done, every drop of his cum inside the condom, he lays beside you while you both breathe heavily. You close your eyes for a bit trying to catch a breath.

Moments later, you feel the mattress dip as he moves. Opening your eyes, you see him standing up. He throws the condom into the bin that sits in the corner of his room. Sitting up, now that the moment is over you feel the weird feeling coming back.

You've never been in this situation before. What are you supposed to do? You should probably get the hell out of here. Jimin's eyes are on you, watching you and your naked figure as you quickly get to the edge of his bed, grabbing your shirt.

“I, uh, I should probably go.” you mutter awkwardly, quickly putting on your shirt followed by your panties. You don't bother to put the bra on, silently showing how quickly you want to get out of here.

“You can take a shower if you want.” he offers while putting his boxers back on.

You look at him stopping all your movements debating what to do. “Look, I don’t want to make this weird. Go take a shower, I’ll wait and then you can go home, okay? You don’t have to feel like escaping.” he says softly, but his eyes are nothing but serious.

As much as you want to leave, you kind of don’t. But the sound of shower and the thought of wiping the sweat and smell of sex sounds good. The whole bedroom reeks of sex.

“Okay.” you reply, picking up jeans from the floor.

“The first door on the right.” he tells you and with soft thank you you scurry into the bathroom.

His bathroom has a nice shower but also a bathtub on the opposite side. You quickly clean yourself thinking of how good Jimin’s touch felt. It’s too good and it’s all you can think about. You slowly shake your head thinking it’s from the adrenaline you feel right now. When you dress your clothes back on you slowly walk into the kitchen where Jimin is standing.

He turns around when he hears your footsteps. “Are you okay?” he asks you once his eyes find yours.

You nod despite feeling a big ache between your legs. He really fucked you roughly. “Do you want something to drink or eat?”

His behavior makes you a little bit surprised. He acts like nothing happened while you’re freaking out inside. “No, thanks. I should probably go.” you say awkwardly.

He escorts you to the front door where you quickly put your shoes and jacket on. When you are about to leave, his soft voice calling your name stops you. “Thank you.”

“For what? That’s what we all agreed on.” you laugh nervously. He simply nods, opening the door for you.

“I’ll see you.” he says with a little smile.

“Bye, Jimin.” you smile and quickly turn around to hide your red face.

When you hear the soft thud of a closed door, you exhale heavily.

Holy shit, you just slept with your best friend’s boyfriend. And it was fucking great.

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