#like naw the fuck i can't

[seabunnypoppy]

splatoon devs realizing they have two sea anemone in the game that look completely different and redesigning the first one to look more like the second one is VERY funny

#aww hell naw poppy's speakin #i think i like the old one more but i can't deny the sheer gender emanating from her big goddamn May Guilty Gear cap #hell fucking yeah girl you rock that

[shedontlovehuhself]

Naw, redo season 8 first.

#thats all i need #it started off real strong then somebody said fuck it #can't give jon a spin off after wtf they did #naw #game of thrones #got #hbo #like who asked for this??

[shotmrmiller]

johnny dates your friend and then asks her if she's got any friends (you) for his friend (simon). but simon freaks you out. he can't hold a conversation— or won't, you're not sure; you're lucky if you get monosyllabic grunts out of him as if he were a neanderthal. the only times you've seriously heard him talk is to bark out words at either johnny or the bartender.

he walks around with a poorly concealed weapon on his hip, almost like he is expecting trouble. he wears all black, which is completely fine, but then a skull balaclava that he refuses to take off, even to drink his liquor. you don't try to hide the grimace on your face when you watch him sip through the thick fabric. he's got skeleton gloves on his hands too, like some sort of shit cosplay to match his mask.

and he fucking stares, unashamedly so. it is unblinking, scrutinizing, intense— his dark eyes, pools of midnight, keen. he stares at the people walking in through the door, stares at johnny when he takes your friend to the dance floor, and when you tell him out of courtesy that you're going to go get another drink, you can feel him boring holes into the back of your head as you walk away, piercing flesh and bone.

the phantom fingers of his gaze trace icy paths along your spine, erupting your skin in goosebumps. you find him immensely creepy, and you thank the fucking stars you're only here as a favor for your friend. you don't think you want to do this again. he's either a wanted serial killer or just a goddamn freak.

a heavy arm wraps around your shoulders once you're at the bar, and with a sneer on your lips, you turn to the owner of said offending limb, only to come face to face with johnny. he leans into you, close enough to where you can feel his stubble grazing the shell of your ear. (back up, brother.)

"listen, bonnie!" you wince; it's really not that loud in here for him to be yelling like that. "ah ken, ghos— er, simon, might no' be yer average man. he can be a little off-puttin'—" a little? if he doesn't follow you home and skin you alive, you'd be incredibly fortunate— "but ah promise ye, while he may no' be boyfriend material, he's an incredible fuck."

excuse me? he's got to be positively pissed. "maybe you should slow down, yeah? you might already be three sheets to the wind if you're gassing up your unsettling friend's cock. no offense."

"naw! ah'm tellin' ye. long ago, we had a mission tha' ran everyone tight, 'n so we relieved tension the only way we could— big, strong guy like him had me limpin' for a few days after."

you're about to ask for an angel shot because there is no way in hell that your friend's boyfriend is making casual conversation about him getting absolutely railed by—

"give 'em a try. jus' the once, i swear he don't bite," johnny pauses-- the rosy flush on his nose and cheeks vibrant, "unless ye ask nicely. yer friend said ye needed to get laid, anyways." oh, you're gonna fucking kill her, that long-tongued cretin.

"right!" you drink the remainder of your cocktail in one big gulp, liquid warmth trailing down your throat, before not-so-kindly shrugging him off. "i'm gonna go, you, uh— we didn't have this conversation, for the sake of my friend." you gesture at the bartender. "one more, please. i'm gonna need it."

-

damn. now johnny's got you thinking about getting your back broken by simon. maybe you really are just down horrendously, or maybe it's the alcohol in your system that has decided to toss all self-preservation out the metaphorical window because now you can't stop noticing him.

he's real tall— enough to have him slightly tipping his head to walk through a doorway. his shoulders are mountainous, his hands the size of a bear's paw. his physicality is undoubtedly impressive and well, you've always been weak to burly, commanding men.

you make eye contact with johnny from across the room, his bright blue eyes alive under the dim light of the dingy bar, and the bastard shifts his gaze from simon to you, giving a cheeky wink.

lifting your glass, you drink the last of your liquid courage— the taste of it bittersweet. it has been a long time since you've gotten laid.

double damn.

"hey." you lean slightly toward simon, cupping your hand around your mouth. "you and i both know why we're here. take me home?" the way he looks at you has you shifting restlessly in your seat. did you perhaps make a mistake? oh, fuck. did you just throw yourself cunt-first at someone who is not interested? your face burns with embarrassment, heat licking up your cheeks. maybe the earth will split open, right here ri—

"let's go then." oh thank fucking god. you don't know what you would've done if he'd said no. shrivel up and die, probably. "uber'll be here in 4."

when it arrives, he places his leather jacket around your shoulders, cocooning you in its warmth— the heady scent of nicotine clings to the garment— and leads you outside with a hand on the small of your back.

-

the world outside the car blurs into a hazy painting as the driver navigates the streets. colors blend together, once sharp outlines now dissolved. the rain gently taps on the window, a soothing sound that could easily lull you to sleep until you start when a roughened palm suddenly glides along your thigh— fingers slowly tracing intimate patterns on your skin.

simon's hand is hot, and it only burns hotter the closer it gets to your center under your least favorite skirt. he cannot be serious right now. you place your hand over his, short nails biting into him because there is no way you're about to be fingered in an uber—

his voice is deep, a deliciously thick rumble, right by your ear. "nice kitty." you've never been one for pet names or anything else for that matter, but the pulse of arousal that shoots up your spine has a shaky exhale leaving your lips, a ghostly breath fogging up the window.

the tips of his fingers tease the seam of your knickers, a generic cotton fabric that clings to your dampening cunt like a second skin— desire trickling onto the gusset. your whimper is drowned out by the terrible music the driver is currently playing when his small finger grazes over your slit, featherlight.

"so wet already? i've barely even touched ya, love." again with the cunt-clenching nicknames. he has no business purring them out like that. "i can smell your sweet pussy from here. you really must be achin' for it." of course the time he chooses to be vocal, it's to spew filth. "don't worry, i'll treat ya good."

somehow, you actually manage to choke out a response. "i'm sure. johnny-" you hiss through clenched teeth when he slips under your knickers, a finger brushing along your slick entrance, "said you had him walking side to side once." you buck your hips, seeking the friction you need, but it only makes him pull away a bit; how unsurprisingly cruel.

"only because he was bein' a brat. you're not a brat though, are ya? gonna be good f'me?" your tongue is heavy in your mouth, words lodged in your throat— all you can give him is a slight nod. "i expect verbal answers. i'd hate to spank your arse raw. how would ya sit down after?"

the idea of being bent over his strong thighs, face pressed into his couch as his firm hand takes you into the needy subspace you crave is too much, or maybe not enough because you're tucking your face into the side of his neck in an instant. "please," you warble, unsure of what you're even begging for.

he curls his finger, slipping between your lips, and when he finally brushes your clit— a fleeting, tantalizing touch— your eyes threaten to roll into the back of your head. "needy little thing. i bet there's a damp spot right where you're sittin'. drippin' all over my fingers—" your breath is ripped from your lungs when he abruptly pulls his hand out and away, the sodden material of your knickers snapping against your heated skin. you're about to snarl out a vicious what the fuck, but the once-blurred scenery outside sharpens into focus.

the driver parks and looks at you from the rearview mirror. "we're here." you mumble a muted thank you, stepping out with quivering legs and a drenched cunt. a crisp breeze dances across your skin, a refreshing contrast to the stifling heat from inside the car.

as soon as the car drives off, you're hoisted onto a broad shoulder. the world tilts, and you fist the back of simon's shirt for stability. "highly unnecessary. i can wa—" you let out a squeak when he slaps the back of your thigh, the sharp bite of it sending a jolt straight to your throbbing center.

"hush."

you sputter indignantly as you hold on tighter, breaths coming out in short gasps, syncing with each step. "i beg your pardon?"

you yelp when he gives you another slap, this time closer to your cunt. "then beg." you're rendered speechless.

wow. maybe you've actually bitten off more than you can chew.

the wet cement under you is a blur, the texture lost in the rush of his movements until he comes to a stop, and you hear a familiar jingle of keys. he bursts through the door, the hinges groaning in protest, and you're staggeringly planted on both feet.

"nice place." a lie. it looks unlived in— brand spanking new. you vaguely hear the lock behind you as you take in your surroundings. a perfect, leather couch, not a crease in sight. the rug under it is pristine and bland, a cream color that matches the rest of his flat. impersonal. not an ounce of real personality anywhere. you begin shrugging off his jacket when you're suddenly pressed against the cold door, simon bent at the knees in front of you, his dark eyes— sharp as blades— lock onto yours.

"gonna beg?"

the fire in your lower belly reignites at the sight of his unmasked face. ash-brown hair in a simple crew cut, thick brows with the right one bisected by a pink, gnarled scar. slightly crooked nose, broken one too many times, and thin, pale lips. a countenance to match his rugged personality.

you're pulled out of your thoughts when he licks a hot stripe over your covered slit and you mewl at the sensation. "i asked you a question."

the words rush out of your mouth before you can even think of stopping them. "yes, yes! please, god, i don't- just- please let me come! i-" his thumbs hook into the waistband of your knickers and tug them down slowly, strings of arousal sticking to the gusset, smearing on your inner thighs.

"alrigh', since ya begged so prettily." your vision goes white when he throws one leg over his shoulder, and his slick tongue slides through your folds, the tip flicking your clit lightly. he laps at your cunt like it drips milk and honey— nourishing and sweet. simon groans into you, the sound crawling up your vertebrae and into the base of your skull.

he begins to draw lazy circles around your pearl, every swirl of his tongue has your back bowing as if winding it, inching you closer to the precipice. your toes curl in your shoes, hands finding purchase in his coarse hair, knuckles staining white as you start the feel the familiar tightening in your lower belly.

and then he pushes one thick finger into you, down to the scarred knuckle, and crooks it. the squelching noise your dripping pussy makes when he presses on the tiny patch of rough skin inside is loud and obscene; practically echoing off the dull, ivory walls of his flat.

"gonna come f'me? make a mess all over my hand?" simon adds another finger, a slight burn nipping at the heels of the pleasure coiling under your navel.

"c'mon. give it to me, pet." his lips encircle your clit, giving it a light suckle and it's—

the coil snaps, a sudden release of tension. it is violent and oh, so exquisite. white noise in your head, your ears, coursing through your veins. it prickles, it stings; it's pleasure and pain. your soul sinks back into your body— like a feather returning to its nest— and you blink, momentarily unbalanced.

"ya with me?"

you breathe deep— the taste of salt in the air, the scent of sweat-slick skin, your heart pulsing with life. "yes. i'm here." the man took you to the stars and laid you on them. jesus.

"good." the room spins, and you're weightless, nestled in his arms. it'd seem innocent if it wasn't for the stickiness in between your thighs, or the prominent bulge in his jeans occasionally pressing into your arse.

simon kicks a door open, knob bouncing off the wall with a crack, and quickly places you on the bed before tugging his shirt off. the belt and jeans come off next, and—

"you don't wear pants." why would he let that monstrosity just hang like that?

"good observation. is water still wet?" he asks, tonelessly. you narrow your eyes at him, pushing your tongue against the back of your teeth.

"fuck me for having eyes and using them as intended, i guess," you mumble under your breath. he grabs you by the ankle and tugs the skirt off, then your shoes, "ouch, i like my feet where they are, thank you," and literally rips your shirt in half. "you'll be giving me on of yours before i leave as recompense."

he holds himself up with his arms over you, your thighs burning as they cradle his hips.

his cock is a heavy, hot weight on your stomach— ruddy, leaking tip right under your navel. you're not small by any means, but he's going to tear you in half. there's no surviving such an onslaught. he's not just leaving you with a limp, he's going to turn your two smaller holes into one big one.

he tears into a golden wrapper with his teeth, and expertly rolls the condom on. simon lowers down to his elbows and nudges your jaw with his nose. "i'll stop the moment ya call it. tap on me if you're feelin' overwhelmed."

that's the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to you, and the fact that it comes from a massive creep who stares at people like they owe him money has you a bit dumbstruck.

his stubble grazes the side of your neck as he glides his cock along your slick folds; once, thrice, until the head catches on your swollen entrance. simon pushes in slow, agonizingly slow— you don't know if it's better or worse because you feel every devastating inch of his length as it forcibly wrenches your walls apart.

your senses are solely focused on him: his body enveloping yours completely. his breath, sweetened like malt, wafts gently across your skin. his thick waist that you can't fully wrap your legs around. everything about him is big— his physicality, his presence, his cock.

"take a deep breath for me, pet. feel everythin' i'm givin' you."

your lungs expand as you do, and when you exhale, your muscles slacken. rapturous pleasure begins to bleed through the delicate membrane that separates it from the bite of pain, until boundaries are blurred and—

and he sinks into you like a rock breaking the surface tension of still water, bottoming out in one, smooth stroke. you can't help the mewl that falls from your lips nor the way your walls clamp down around him.

"fuck, there it is. so bloody tight, this greedy cunt is takin' my cock like it was made for me."

there isn't a single coherent thought in your head and you're glad for it. finally, someone to fuck you stupid.

simon gives you an experimental thrust, dragging his length along every single one of your nerves, and then another— desire overflowing from where he stuffs you to the very brim. "good. ready?"

he takes your tiny nod as an answer this time and begins to fuck you in earnest. it takes everything in you to not black out from how perfect it felt.

simon puts his weight behind every thrust, a steady pull out, and a spine-jarring push in. you can feel him deep in your stomach, a delicious pinch of discomfort each time he presses against the plug of your womb.

"so fuckin' wet, your cunt's droolin' all over me." he hooks an arm under your left leg and lifts, the angle he's put you in tittering dangerously on the tightrope of rapture and ache.

it's so good, so fucking good, your slick walls fluttering as he carves himself into you, your soul, your cunt when you feel a tight snap inside.

simon pulls out in an instant, taking your breath with him as he does. you look down at his cock and notice that—

"the condom broke. i've got another in the drawer, gimme a sec."

there is some weird thing that lodges in place somewhere deep in your sternum when you realize that he's been nothing but considerate and attentive to you since he brought you home and hasn't fussed over anything once. it's an extremely low bar, you are aware. rewarding what should be the bare fucking minimum is sad, but you're not completely altruistic in your motives anyway. you want to feel his bare cock inside as he rearranges your insides.

"no!" he quickly turns to look at you, "no. it's okay. i'm clean and i'm also on the pill. if that's okay with you, of course."

a man his stature should not move as fast as he just did, blinking from one side of the room to the other. he quickly throws both of your legs over his shoulders, heels resting on his back when he sinks back in, this time letting out a guttural groan as he does.

you can feel the ridge of his flared head, the warmth of his cock seeping into your tender walls— a new level of intimacy. he fucks you with fervor now, a precise snap of his hips that has your teeth clacking with every thrust.

your climax takes you by complete surprise, crashing into you like waves on a rocky, jagged shore. burst after burst of blinding pleasure threatens to consume you whole, and when your limbs are loose and syrupy— body limp— only then do you realize that he came just as fast. thick white ropes of viscous spend cover your stomach and trail down to your abused cunt.

your hamstrings already hurt with delayed onset muscle soreness. you might actually need a wheelchair to go back home.

(thank god your hips held out, and no, you don't care that it's essentially sacrilegious of you to even think that.)

his breathing comes out in ragged bursts, beads of sweat dripping onto the valley of your breasts.

and he's back to the fucking staring. "simon."

"pet."

"please stop looking at me like that."

he huffs and dips his head to flick your hardened nipple with his tongue, making you hiss with over sensitivity.

"make me."

-

as dawn breaks, the world begins to stir awake. hues of pale pink stain the sky, the first blush of morning. light and shadow begin to blend in the bedroom.

your phone vibrates under the pillow, simon's arm tightening around your soft waist at the buzzing sound. his lips press a light kiss on the sensitive skin by your ear, and his large hand begins to weave its way downward, pads of his fingers gathering the evidence of last night (or early morning) and gently parts your folds, brushing light strokes on your clit.

when he places your leg around his hip and sinks into you from behind, your phone buzzes again-- alone and forgotten.

good morning!!! i expect a full, detailed report by lunch or so help you god.

sent 5:30 am

about time you got laid, you're not you when you're horny.

sent 5:49 am

#call of duty #simon ghost riley #cod mw2 #cod mwii #simon ghost riley smut #cod smut #simon ghost riley x f reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x reader

[quimichi]

NSFW - MDI

He's obsessed with your voice. He loves the way you whimper and just struggle your words out. He loves to to tease, he LIVES to tease you. He's so mean whe he asks what you want, just so he can deny it and command you to beg for it.

He's buried deep inside of you, barely able to hold himself up, panting heavily. He looks down at the pretty face you're making and he can't help but think that the only thing that would make it better is the sound of your beautiful voice.

"Tell me what you want, baby" he breathes in your ear, dropping his head down to your neck. He stopped moving. His hot breath hitting your heated skin. "I asked you somethin'~" he hums leaning back down to press kiss over your shoulder. You can practically feel his smirk in his voice.

"Please-" is all you're able to stutter out at first and it makes him grin onto your skin as he lifts his head to shake it at you. "Naw, I couldn't quite hear you princess,.. you should use bigger words for your needs?" there's this pout on his face, he's mocking you. Out of desperation you kiss him, in hopes that he could possibly forget about your loss of words.

He indulges you for a few seconds before pulling away and raising his eyebrow at you. That's when you realise he's serious; he really won't move an inch until you tell him exactly what you want. "Please-, just.. fuck me" you whine, you know it won't be enough for him but you hope it is because if he doesn't move in the next thirty seconds you feel you might combust. You honestly don't know what will combust, but something is definitely blowing up and its also gonna be you.

"Good start, baby, but it's not enough" he chuckles at your responding whine and buries his head into you neck chuckling. Although this is more than entertaining, he also has to hide the fact this is just as agonizing for him like it is for you. "How do you want it, hm? Tell me how you want me to fuck you." "Please, just fuck me. Fuck me hard. Fuck me dumb. Fuck me so hard you break me, the bed or the wall. I don't care just please fuck me" you desperately shout out in embarrassment.

He lets out an elated laugh, this is exactly what he wants to hear. He leans in to kiss you and ends up muffling the happy whine you let out when he finally starts moving. But quickly you feel dizzy, you're beyond coherent words at this point. You can't even think straight. He feels so good inside you that you almost go crazy. You instinctively grab at his skin, raking your nails over his shoulder blades. He loves being able to get you like this, he loves listen to you break like this. You and the pretty noises you make are all his to enjoy....

Kageyama, Tsukishima, Matsukawa, Kuroo, Atsumu, Suna, Tendou, Terushima (haikyuu)

Kaeya, Al-Haitham, Ayato, Itto, Scaramouche, Wriothesley, Dottore, Pantalone (genshin)

Geto, Nanami, Gojo, Toji (JJK)

Hisoka, Chrollo, Feitan, Phinks (HxH)

Rafayel (love and deepspace)

Leona, Lilia, Jade, Floyd, Ace, Trey (twst wonderland)

#x female reader #x fem!reader #genshin x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #haikyuu x reader #jjk x reader #love and deepspace x reader #hxh x reader #kaeya x reader #alhambra #ayato x reader #itto x reader #scaramouche x reader #dottore x reader #pantalone x reader #ace trapolla x reader #leona kingscholar x reader #lilia vanrouge x reader #jade leech x reader #floyd leech x reader #nanami x reader #geto x reader #gojo x reader #toji x reader #rafayel x reader #kageyama x reader #matsukawa x reader #tsukishima x reader #kuroo x reader #wriothesley x reader

[blujayonthewing]

it sounds like Belial is very likely to let Elyss use his obsidian steed and holy shit I'm so excited to ride a nightmare into battle, what the fuck, 90ft flying speed and entering/ leaving the ethereal plane at will, this fucking RULES

#he's let Elyss ride it before: once just... being nice for no (immediately apparent) specific reason #'you seem stressed. would you like to fly through this storm on a flaming horse for awhile' YES... YES I WOULD. #then also one time we took a little murder sidequest just the two of us and used it to get there and back but #in neither case did I get to just be flying around in open combat on it #normally 'I can shoot from 600ft away without penalty and I'm also on a super fast flying horse' would be like... #it's LEGAL but I usually wouldn't do it because it feels Too Good? but in this case because of various reasons yea naw I'm SO here for it #this is what I meant by 'stephen said Elyss could probably 1v1 a dragon' and I'm not sure he was even half-joking #a dragon can't CATCH me! a dragon's breath weapon CANNOT match my range with a bow! I can kite a motherfucker FOREVER #[punching the air] FUCK. SHIT. UP. #about me #my OCs #elyss

[thefatedthoughtofyou]

In Which Steve Gains a Little Weight and Eddie May or May Not Have a Staring Problem { hint: he absolutely does. but who wouldn't? }

Chubby!Steve lovers rise up! He is a blessing upon our houses. 😌

Eddie's been staring at him. For months. Steve had actually had to snap his fingers at Eddie once, right in front of his face. To get his attention. And Eddie had flinched and flailed back dramatically, making it seem like Steve was the offending party when Eddie had been the one staring. He was always staring.

Steve never used to mind people staring. He knew he looked good. Not in a self centered way. Just... people told him he looked good. And he didn't really have reason to argue. Girls definitely liked him. So it just seemed... like a fact. To him.

But lately Steve hadn't been feeling attractive. At least not as attractive. He'd gained a bit of weight. With the gates closed for good and Hawkins back to normal. He'd finally let himself relax. And he'd been eating more, his appetite from before all the anxiety and stress and fighting for his life, and the kids lives, finally coming back.

He still swam a bit. Went for runs every morning. But he was filling out. His thighs were thicker. His stomach softer. He'd heard his mother call one of his cousins "pudgy" when he was young and now everytime he looked in the mirror the word rang in his head like a bell.

He was pudgy. Less defined, soft around the edges. And Eddie kept. Fucking. Staring.

~°~

Steve was laying on one of the lounge chairs by the pool. Eddie was floating in the water, eyes closed, arms moving gently at his sides, keeping him afloat. Steve tugged his shirt down, again, and tried to get comfortable.

It was just him and Eddie today. Robin had to work. And the kids were in school. Steve was just glad Eddie had gotten in the water. So he would stop looking at him. Cuz he'd been doing it again. His eyes locked on Steve, roaming over him, looking at god knows what.

Steve knows what. Wraps his arms around his middle and feels what he knows Eddie has been staring at. Skinny as a rat Eddie Munson who can eat whole fucking pizzas and just... nothing. Steve ate whole pizzas too, that wasn't the issue. It was just, Steve's pizza seemed to settle on his hips now more than it used too.

He hears Eddie make a choking sound and watches him flail and sink beneath the water, popping up a moment later, coughing, and dragging Steve out of his thoughts.

"You good man?" Steve calls, letting his hands fall away from his body. Eddie keeps coughing but gives Steve a thumbs up, then wipes at his face, rubbing at his nose as he stands looking like a wet kitten in the middle of the pool. He clears his throat loudly, shakes his head, coughs once more, and then ducks back under water just to bounce back up, his face toward the sky, the water moving his hair out of his face.

Steve had walked to the edge of the pool, watching Eddie cough. He sits himself on the edge, feet dangling in the water to cool himself off. He could take his shirt off. It would be cooler. But he can't. Doesn't want to. Not in front of Eddie.

He watches Eddie lower himself shoulders deep in the water and then look up at Steve, he smiles, soflty.

"I fell asleep." He says, to belatedly explain his nearly chocking to death. Steve rolls his eyes, snorts, and shakes his head.

"Of course you did." Steve sighs.

"Hey it's not my fault. If you had some nice floaties around here like the goblins have been asking for I wouldn't have almost died." Eddie retorts.

And Steve is about to argue, he wants too, opens his mouth to do it and everything. But he catches the way Eddie is looking at him again and the words die in his mouth. His arms wrapping around his soft middle as he tries to hide, he sits up a bit straighter. Eddie swims toward him, eyes lingering.

"You gonna swim?" Eddie asks, soflty.

"Naw. Don't think so. I'm not that warm." Steve shrugs, kicks his feet in the water a bit as Eddie moves closer.

"You're sweating." Eddie says, pointing out the obvious. Steve glares at him a bit, nothing too harsh, and wipes at his forhead with the back of his arm.

"I'm good. Just my feet in is nice." He kicks water at Eddie, he doesn't even dodge it, just lets it hit him as he keeps swimming forward.

He nods at Steve, swims up next to him, rests his arms on the side of the pool and his chin on his arms, looking up at Steve until Steve turns and looks directly at him. Eddie quickly looks away then. Steve looks away too.

Looks away from the pale skin of Eddie's shoulders. Away from the way Eddie's arms flex as he shifts a bit to get more comfortable. Away from that look in his eyes.

"Do I make you uncomfortable?" Eddie asks out of nowhere.

"What?" Steve asks, leaning away from Eddie a little faster than he'd meant too. Eddie tracks the movement, Steve sees him do it.

"Do I make you uncomfortable?" Eddie repeats.

"No I heard you. It's just-" he pauses, shakes his head. His heart beating a little faster.

"Why would you ask that? You don't make me uncomfortable. I like having you here. If that's... is that what you mean?" Steve asks, stammering a bit. Not really sure what Eddie wants from him. Eddie shakes his head though, slowly. Once.

"No I mean... you've just seemed... different. Lately. Like... you're trying to sink into yourself. Make yourself smaller. Or something." Eddie shrugs, shakes his head like he doesn't think he made sense. But Steve's heart pounds with just how much sense he made. Hit the nail right on the head, actually, in the scary way he has.

"I-" he considers lying. Saying everything's fine. But it's not. And if he says it is, Eddie will think he's done something wrong. And he hasn't. Not really. Eddie's eyes widen, he lifts his head, then stands, leans his hip agaisnt the wall of the pool instead.

"Yes?" Eddie teases, bumping Steve's knee with the back of his hand. Steve huffs a laugh and takes a deep breath.

"I am. Trying to make myself smaller. Like, in the figurative sense. Cuz I'm like, I've gained weight. And I don't... I don't know. I guess I'm just... uncomfortable with that? Not because of you." Steve says, watches Eddie smile at him. For some fucking reason.

"Literal sense. And why does that make you uncomfortable? Not getting as many chicks? Are the ladies of Hawkins really so shallow?" Eddie asks, brushing past his correction and partly mocking Steve, like he knows that's not the issue. And Steve is so thankful, just that small amount of mocking makes him feel a little better. Like he's being silly maybe, about the whole thing.

"Well. Yes. They are. Some of them. But I don't know. It was just a thing. At first. A thing I noticed in the mirror getting out of the shower. Or after swimming. Or trying to fit into some of my old jeans. Just a thing. Just a difference I noticed is all." He shrugs, eyes on the water.

"You're not the only one." Eddie mutters, teeth pulling at his bottom lip.

"What?" Steve asks, he hadn't been paying attention, the words a muddy sound on the peripherals of his hearing. Eddie shakes his head, waves him off.

"Nothin. Don't worry about it." He pushes his hand through the water at his side before looking back to Steve.

"Bodies change man. It happens. Nothin' wrong with it." He shrugs again, lowers himself back to his shoulders and looks up at Steve, his hair a dark cloud in the water around him. Steve sighs, feels silly and stupid for what he's about to say.

"Yeah. Sure. But I used to be hot." He says, matter of factly. Eddie snorts.

"You are hot. Way hotter now than when we were in school." Eddie says, like he can't believe what he's hearing, but also.... Eddie thinks he's hot? Steve watches him for a moment, he's got his face tilted to the sky, leaning back to dunk his hair in the cool water, his pale neck on display as he sighs at the cooless on his head.

"You think I'm hot?" Steve asks, has to, can't not. He'd said it so easily, like it should be obvious.

Eddie's eyes go wide as his head snaps back in Steve's direction.

"What?" His voice cracks. He hasn't blinked.

"You said you think I'm hot." Steve says, he can feel his own cheeks flush. But he can see Eddie's doing it. They had already been tinted pink from the early morning sun, but they were rushing quickly toward red.

"No. I didn't- that's not-"

"You said you thought I was hot when we were in school." Steve repeats, feeling a tad bit giddy as he watches the flush rush down Eddie's neck as well.

"That's- that's not... what I meant." Eddie huffs, petulant, but he crosses his arms over his chest, guarding himself.

"But it's what you said." Steve teases, keeping his face as straight as possible. Eddie huffs again.

"Well I clearly didn't mean to say that outloud okay?" He shakes his head, sinks a little in the water before bobbing back up. Steve just looks at him. Tries to give him the look that Eddie had been giving him, for the last few months.

He doesn't know if it works. But Eddie groans loudly and ducks under the water. Steve laughs as a stream of bubbles reach the surfface, he can hear Eddie screaming under the water. When he surfaces again, his face is still a very nice shade of pink, Steve wants to touch it, to feel the heat of it beneath his fingers.

"I'm sorry okay. I have been making you uncomfortable. I've been staring. I know I have, okay? It's just hard not too. When you walk around looking like that!" Eddie waves his hand frantically in Steve's direction, even as he takes a few steps away from him.

"Like what?" Steve's brow furrows, he looks down at himself, his shirt is a little tight around his stomach, his swim trunks a bit snug around the hips, and his thighs are practically squeezed into them. What was Eddie seeing that he wasn't. He looks back to see Eddie staring again, but his eyes are on Steve's face this time.

Steve watches several emotions pass over Eddie's face as he watches him. He seems to settle on determined and takes a step back in Steve's direction. Then another. He stops just out of reach. Sets his shoulders.

"You're fucking beautiful Steve. I don't- I don't know how you can't see that." He shrugs, like he's helpless, his eyes wide and honest. Steve swallows hard, glances down at himself again and then back to Eddie.

"I'm-?"

"Gorgeous. Like.... fucking ethereal. I could fucking look you all day. Fuck, I mean I basically do. You're like a goddamn peice of art." Eddie's voice is so raw, it catches in his throat. His arms wrapped around himself tight, like he's afraid Steve will be mad at him for some reason. Steve shakes his head, once, trying not to cry. He smiles at Eddie, all watery eyed and goofy, and tugs his shirt over his head before throwing himself into the water. And then throwing himself at Eddie, who catches him easily.

His hands are warm on Steve's sides, warm and so so gentle, like he's not sure he's allowed to touch. He just stares at Steve, throat bobbing as Steve moves his fingers over Eddie faces, tracing his features.

"You're pretty easy on the eyes yourself." Steve says, smiles wide when a laugh bursts out of Eddie. Steve presses closer, chest to chest, arms snaking around Eddie's neck, fingers tangling in his hair.

"Can I kiss you?" Eddie whispers, his lashes fluttering as his eyes dart around Steve's face. Steve's chest burns, and pounds, as Eddie's fingers press harder into his hips.

"Yes. Yeah." Steve breathes, nodding, almost frantic. Eddie smiles, leans in a bit, and then sways away with a grimace.

"What? What's wrong?" Steve asks, suddenly feeling a bit sick to his stomach. Eddie squints at him, shakes his head, closes his eyes with another grimace.

"Full disclosure. I've never actually...like... fully kissed someone... before. So I might not- I mean I don't know what I'm doing." Eddie opens one eye, peaking at Steve to see his reaction around his wincing, scrunched up features. Steve's heart flutters, he smiles and scratches his nails gently against Eddie's scalp, Eddie leans into it like a cat.

"That's okay. I know what I'm doing." Steve assures him, Eddie's eyes go wide for a split second and then Steve is kissing him. A small noise startles out of Eddie when their lips meet and Steve could listen to that all day, it's like music. He pulls back after a genlte press, he can feel Eddie's hands trembling against his hips.

"That okay?" Steve asks, Eddie nods enthusiastically and presses back in, another gentle press of lips before Steve pulls back again, eyes moving over Eddie's face and the soft way he's looking at him.

"You really think I'm beautiful? Hot. Like this?" Steve asks, rolling his eyes at himself, his hand moving to his stomach and then away again. Eddie's eyes follow the movement, the way Steve nearly flinches away from his own touch.

"Fuck yes." Eddie says, he sounds breathless. And then Steve is gasping as Eddie leans down, licks a hot stipe across Steve's stomach, and then sinks his teeth into the soft, fleshy, skin of his hip, right above his swim shorts.

"Eddie! Jesus!" Steve squaks, trying to push Eddie away and pull him closer all at once.

Eddie perks back up, pulls Steve close, and presses his laughter into Steve's neck. And then his teeth are on Steve's skin, and he's gasping again, hands grabbing at Eddie's shoulders. Eddie's tongue soothes over the bite and then he's looking at Steve again.

"You're beautiful. Like this, or any other way. Okay? Always." Eddie says, moving his hands over Steve's sides, giving his love handles a hard, possessive, squeeze. Steve laughs, Eddie's antics tickling, he squirms, toward Eddie, into his waiting arms.

"Okay. If you say so." Steve sighs into Eddie's shoulder. Eddie's hand moves up, over Steve's back and into his hair.

"I do say. You're beautiful. Thin, or chubby, or scarred, or fat, or whatever else you might be in the future. You're beautiful." He pauses, pulls back so he can see Steve's face.

"And I'll tell you that whenever you need to hear it okay? For as long you're mine." Eddie's whispering, speaking so softly into the space between them.

"That sounds nice." Steve says, his throat tight, and burning, tears clouding his vision. Eddie chuckles, his chest vibrating against Steve's.

"Which part?" He asks, moving one finger across Steve's forhead, tucking a loose strand of hair away. Steve sniffles, shakes his head and tries not to cry.

"Being yours." He says, his lips trembling as he returns the bright smile across from him. Eddie nods, Steve nods back. They meet in the middle, another sweet press of lips, Eddie's fingers dig into Steve's soft skin and pull him close, like he's trying to climb inside him.

"Mine." Eddie sighs, Steve breathes the word in like he needs it to live. His own fingers dig into Eddie's back, tugging him closer, smiling against Eddie's lips as he sighs,

"Yours." back into Eddie's mouth.

#steddie #chubby!steve harrington #steve harrington x eddie munson #steve x eddie #steddie fic #steddie ficlet #steddie blurb #my fic #mine #my writing

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Muse

Anna Helen Crofts: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, this is a little story that me and howard wrote together Barker: you and howard? how'd that happen? HP Lovecraft: oh we've been looking for a project to do together for a while

Edward Lee: bro you hanging with anna helen crofts now? Lovecraft: yeah Lee: bro Lee: sonia greene, winifred jackson, hazel heald Lee: how are you pulling all this quality tail? Lovecraft: i don't know, i'm just being myself Lee: Lee: bro that doesn't make any sense

Crofts: ok so this story is about a woman who reads a poetry book Crofts: and she has a dream that the gods themselves appear to her Crofts: and they're all 'babe, we got some great news for you' Crofts: you're so hot that you're gonna fuck some inspiration into the world's greatest poet

Crofts: the gods are all 'check it out' Crofts: 'you know Dante Alighieri? William Shakespeare? John Milton?' Crofts: 'morons!' Crofts: 'the guy you're gonna fuck is SO much better'

Angela Carter: a woman's just there to be a muse for a great man, huh? Carter: why can't a woman be a poet herself, I ask you? Crofts: no angela you don't understand Crofts: this chick is SO hot Carter: that doesn't figure into it Patricia Highsmith: naw i think it does

Crofts: me and howard wrote this story together Barker: oh did you now? Poe: clive Barker: i can tell, cuz it's definitely got all the usual hallmarks of a howard story Poe: clive Barker: i bet howard really contributed a lot Poe: clive

Crofts: wouldn't that be great to be a muse Crofts: a poet looks at you, he's all 'this chick is SO hot' Crofts: 'i can't NOT write the world's greatest poem' Crofts: if you think about it, howard Crofts: that's kinda like you and me, don't you think? Lovecraft: yeah i guess

Crofts: something wrong, howard? Lovecraft: no Lovecraft: no it's nothing Lovecraft: its just Lovecraft: that isn't really the direction i thought our collaboration would take Crofts: what's wrong with it? Lovecraft: it's just kinda mushy

Crofts: ok howard well next time we'll write what you want to write Crofts: in fact, here Crofts: why don't you use my beauty as inspiration Crofts: i'll be your muse Barker: ah ha ha Barker: oh honey Barker: oh sweetie Barker: have you read any of howard's stories?

Crofts: write me, howard, write me like one of your squid girls Lovecraft: [sweats] ok um so Lovecraft: [sweats] so in this story there's this girl, ok Crofts: what's she like Lovecraft: indescribable Crofts: Barker: ah aha ha Barker: nice save

#midnight pals #the midnight society #midnight society #clive barker #edgar allan poe #hp lovecraft #angela carter #patricia highsmith #edward lee #anna helen crofts

[azzydoesstuff]

lethal company dashboard simulator

🛠️ she-fillin-my-quota Follow

man 41-experimentation has the worst abandoned facilities. where is all the scrap guh??

🪲 lootyloot-nestynest Follow

the fuck are you calling an abandoned facility?? experimentation is my fucking home you prick. you scrappers call these facilities abandoned but they're not. you're just wandering into our homes and stealing our things. leave it to the scrapper to regurgitate insectophobic slop. blocked

#like i swear to god. these fucking scrappers are so stupid. i hope they all die #insect pride

3,601 notes

🌰 nuts-be-cracked Follow

i swear to god y'all, ain't NOTHINg moving on my watch

🖇️ boioioioing Follow

heyyyy 😏

🌰 nuts-be-cracked Follow

😬

457 notes

🦅 professionalhawkster2 Follow

bro why do the fucking dogs keep messing with my gang?? they almost killed jerry a couple hours ago

🦖 heywhosaidthat Follow

how about you be fucking quiet you fucking pickle thieves

#seriously who steals pickles lmao #fuck baboon hawks

92 notes

🖳 theindomitablesigurd-deactivated1968

T HEY TOOK M Y PIcKLES!!!!1!!

#naw i'm uptading th ose mf dangjer level to 75% agfter tha t shit

18 notes

🛠️ she-fillin-my-quota Follow

first time visiting 7-dine! wonder what i'm gonna find lol

🖇️ boioioioing Follow

hey i live there! lol

🛠️ she-fillin-my-quota Follow

🫣

🖇️ boioioioing Follow

man what the hell

#cw coilphobia #fucking scrappers #hope i coil this bitch lmao

7,084 notes

🦑 badjokesbyjeb Follow

What do you do after eating a really tasty planet? You give the restaraunt five golden stars.

🪙 living-on-the-blingbling-baby Follow

BEAST LET ME OUT ALREADY I NEED TO GET OUT I CAN'T BE DIGESTED YOU FUCKING BEAST CEASE THIS MOCKERY OF OUR GOLDEN PLANET RELEASE ME SPIT OUT THE RINDS LET ME LEAVE

🖁 across-the-system Follow

Haha, good one Jeb! You should really change your url!

#you fucking idiot don't say shit like that #he's gonna fucking escape at some point if you keep doing this and then you'll really be fucked you fucking moron #goodjokesbyjeb

765,014 notes

🦈 thump-thump-thump Follow

who up eatin' their legs

🛠️ she-fillin-my-quota Follow

what

🦈 thump-thump-thump Follow

us thumpers get called halves because when we're born we have to eat the bottom half of our bodies to get out of our eggs. this is why we have no legs and have to use our arms to walk around. hope this helps ❤️

#cw thumperphobic slur #cw half #don't be ignorant like this and do your research #also don't call us halves please #thumpers #thumperposting #thumper gang

132 notes

☣️ richrichardguy-deactivated0709

man why don't this fucking door open. oh it's my fucking crew behind it fucking great. fucking assholes won't stop saying i smell

🌿 rapaxfoliumsnap Follow

hey i think we haven't met before

☣️ richrichardguy-deactivated0709

😨

🖳 theindomitablesigurd-deactivated1968

RICH NOOOOOOOOOOO

#bro stank like shit but i didn't want him to go like this #not like this! not like thiiiiiiis!

64,089 notes

🪲 lootyloot-nestynest Follow

you guys, i just found the coolest fucking metal sheet. you have no idea

42 notes

🛠️ she-fillin-my-quota Follow

BRO GET OUT OF THE DOORWAY STUPID FUCKING BOX

🎁 lethaljesterjestering Follow

listen to my tune

351 notes

🔦 new-guy-working-here Follow

hey guys it's my first week working for the company! i think i'm gonna make quota this time

🌿 rapaxfoliumsnap Follow

no you're not

🔦 new-guy-working-here Follow

no i'm not

9,278 notes

🎭 she-fillin-my-quota Follow

hey guys i'm resigning from the company rn. im gonna make some changes accordingly on my blog now. can someone tell @lootyloot-nestynest i'm sorry and ask them to unblock me. i'm a changed man now, i'm not a scrapper anymore

🖇️ boioioioing Follow

guys idk something seems off about this guy. he was spewing coilphobic shit a couple days ago

🎭 comedy-tragedy-drama Follow

guess who's been busy, coily? 😏😏😏

🖇️ boioioioing Follow

no fucking way

#the madman did it #bro got fucking masked lmao

#is this anything #shitpost #shitposting #lethal company #lethal company shitpost #lethalposting #companyposting #tumblr dashboard simulator #lethalblr #companyblr

[vivwritesfics]

VIV HI 👹✨️

Request 😍❤️

Think like an hidden boyfriend.

Idk how else to explain it

Reader is like a reporter maybe? Or WAG

And it is well know that she is dating one of the drivers. Here is the twist....

No one knows who the boyfriend is 👹🙏

So just imagine one day, one of the other girlfriends post a couple of pictures

The fans are interested in two of them.

One is where the reader is being held by on oc them driver. The person is clearly visible ( not the boyfriend they just like teasing lol)

Now the second is just the reader laying down on the deck with an arm wrapped rather protective over her ( like think hand on ass 👹👹) like nope this is mine,fuck off lol🙏👹

Now everyone is freaking out trying to figure who the boyfriend is and everyone has different reason for who it is

The end would be the reveal after they were found out in a picture (with consent) of these two making out (think damn near fucking)

You can choose who you want to be the boyfriend

Thinking either carlos, max or Oscar for the boyfriend and for the like the first picture lando/logan maybe??

I started this after complaining about how tired i was but Bianca I couldn't resist 😫

naw but i'm so proud of this one

y/nl/n

liked by jensonbutton, maxverstappen1 and 455,819 others

y/nl/n i love my job 🫶🫶

view all 2,753 others

username1 living the dream 😫😫

alex_albon can't believe you didn't interview me

y/nl/n was too busy sucking face with your girlfriend 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

lilymhe mwah 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

username2 who is she?

username3 username2 how do you not know Y/N?

username4 she's a reporter for Sky Sports F1 and Lando's best friend

username5 the dating rumours tho 👀👀

y/nl/n

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 477,819 others

y/nl/n ma homie

view all 2,917 comments

username6 HOW DID YOU GET YOUR JOB I WANNA BE YOU SO BAD

georgerussell63 you're in the wrong garage

y/nl/n you're in the wrong team (kidding toto ily)

landonorris 💖💖

username7 LANDO?

username7 EXCUSE ME?

username8 he's really fuelling those rumours 😂

y/nl/n landonorris you know what you're doing 😠

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, mclaren, and 499,143

y/nl/n team papaya 4eva 🧡

view all 3,074 comments

mclaren absolute queen

y/nl/n admin ily

lilymhe i am in AWE of you 😩

y/nl/n says you 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

landonorris my favourite girl 💕

y/nl/n your only girl? 🤧🤧

username9 they're dating

username10 i can't TAKE it anymore just tell us PLEASE 😭

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 532,664 others

y/nl/n love ya lan

view all 3,752 comments

username11 naw this is a hard launch

username12 they've been friends for years so...

username13 this was not on my 2023 bingo card

username14 ILY GUYS this is so cute 💖💖💖💘💘💘💘💓💓💗💗💗💗💗💓💓💕💕💕💖💘💘💘💕❤❤♥♥♥♥❣❣💖💖❤❤❤❤❤

username15 literally no other drivers are commenting 👀👀

username16 yeah this is sus

username17 i don't trust either of you 😭

y/nl/n

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1, and 566,983 others

y/nl/n switching sides

view all 4,996 comments

landonorris 😔😔

mclaren we miss you y/n! 😭😭

y/nl/n i miss you too admin 😭

username18 WHAT

username18 DOES

username18 THIS

username18 MEAN

scuderiaferrari welcome y/n! ❤

y/nl/n officially a tifosi now

y/nl/n

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 605,224 others

y/nl/n mwah

view all 5,832 others

landonorris we lost her 😔

y/nl/n shut up you muppet

username19 THE SOFT LAUNCH?

username20 i mean we all knew she was dating a driver but WHO IS IT?

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 679,475 others

y/nl/n 😈😈😈😈

view all 9,884 comments

carlossainz55 😈😈😈😈

username21 THE GLOVES

username22 THE GLOVES

username23 THE GLOVES

charles_leclerc you guys are disgusting

y/nl/n *disgustingly cute

landonorris so i don't have to keep it secret now?

y/nl/n you are released from your duties

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 675,329 others

y/nl/n love a man in red ❣

view all 5,884 comments

carlossainz55 passenger princess

username24 why does it shock me that carlos knows that phrase?

y/nl/n idk he's the real passenger princess here 👸👸

username25 girlies we lost him 😔

username26 girlies we lost HER 😔

landonorris he is babygirl 🥰🥰🥰

y/nl/n 🤺🤺

carlossainz55

liked by pierregasly, y/nl/n, and 696,335 others

carlossainz55 mía 💖

mine 💖

view all 6,835 comments

y/nl/n te amo ❤

carlossainz55 Te quiero más ❤

landonorris 📷📷??

y/nl/n back off bitch

lilymhe you stole my girlfriend 😠

y/nl/n he's just my side piece babygirl, dw 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

#formula one #formula one imagine #formula one x reader #f1 #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #formula 1 #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 x reader #f1 smau #f1 social media au #formula one smau #carlos sainz #carlos sainz imagine #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz fluff #carlos sainz smut #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz x reader smut #carlos sainz smau #cs55 #cs55 imagine #cs55 x reader #cs55 smau

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

So With Spider-Punk: Arms Race #2 right around the corner: .......I'm gonna say it

Hobie's New Design is Bad.

Incredibly bad. Like 'leave it in the drafts homie' bad. Fuck it, I'm about to start using words I ain't even know I knew - this shit is EGREGIOUS.

It ain't cute.

It's bad. It's ugly, bro. His hair is serving Coral Reef And I'm tired of pretending it's not.

And it feels SO subtly anti-black.

[A very SHORT essay where I basically say: Oh hell naw]

For one I feel like they're stripping Hobie's black features. Or toning them down a LOT.

Even if we aren't counting the blue eyes they gave in him in Issue One.

Now, over time Hobie's looked many different ways - but throughout his runs his features were 100% supposed to be interpreted as black.

And while his newer comic runs tone that down a bit, it still looks natural.

And his hair has ALWAYS been natural. So much so that it's one of the defining features of movie Hobie as well.

This.... Isn't that. Not only has his natural hair been shaved and died, but it was done into a style made to DIRECTLY ripoff an already popular WHITE character - Gwen Stacy.

And once again, BLUE EYES???

And it's so bizarre!!!! Cause his design hasn't changed, but it REALLY HAS!! LIKE LOOK-

This is supposed to be the same guy, making the same expression. This is not the same fucking guy.

They have the same brow shape and lip shape and nose, but that's not the same fucking guy and I can't articulate why.

Looking at his profile highlights this way more, especially when putting him next to Movie Hobie.

Notice how ALL of Comic!Hobie's features are RAZOR sharp?

Whereas, Movie!Hobie's features, his features are actually fairly soft.

His nose and lips are curved and soft - even his pronounced brow bone is still curved, DESPITE him having a sharper face shape than Comic!Hobie.

That's because Movie Hobie has Black People Features.

Comic Hobie DOESN'T.

I wish I was joking when I say -

I feel like they're genuinely using Johnny Storms model and coloring it brown.

It's just... too bad not too be.

This redesign is atrocious. It's worse than the Attack on Titan manga.

And from what we can tell - this is a HOBIE SPECIFIC problem. Riri Williams - IronHeart - looks FINE.

Not to be dramatic, but this is very much a disappointment. It's honestly impressive how they managed to fumble the design bag SO EASILY.

Marvel Comics only leases Hobie Brown character to Sony. Hobie is still their IP - they can plunder his SONY design as much as they like, so long as it looks reasonably Not Identical.

And still they decided to do a 180, tone down his black features, unnatural his hair, and give him blue eyes.

Marvel. Pack it up. You're chopped.

#spiderman #atsv #spider man #marvel #across the spiderverse #hobie brown #spider punk #spiderpunk #SpiderPunk Arms Race #marvel comics #meta analysis

[bits-and-babs]

✰ 𝐏𝐔𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐖𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 — 𝐒𝐈𝐌𝐎𝐍 ‘𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐓’ 𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐘

↳ summary: prompt: “You can take more than that." & "We might get caught. Does that turn you on?" -- Your ridiculous innuendoes in the gym with Soap go too far for Ghost's liking.

↳ pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x f!Reader (Delta)

↳ [1k] content:18+ MDNI. ft. Soap, Gym & Exercising, ridiculous innuendoes, angry sex, rough handling, spanking, p in v sex, unprotected sex, mild degradation, possessiveness, jealous Ghost.

ghost masterlist I| main masterlist |I join taglist

"That all you can do?"

You exhale sharply as you drop the barbell onto the gym floor. The heavy cast iron plates clang against the floor, the crash reverberating across the open gym as you glower up at the masked man.  

Ghost stands above you, his black tank top clinging to his sweaty torso and accentuating his muscular physique. He's tucked it into the waistband of his grey sweatpants. It's so odd to see him outside of his kit- almost scandalous. His skull mask still sits over his face, covering down to where his clavicles meet at the base of his throat, but his biceps are on full display, black ink sharp against his pale skin. 

Heaving pants escape your lips as you wipe perspiration from your brow with the back of your forearm. Yes, you're working up a sweat, but something about seeing so much of Ghost's skin has you as hot on the inside as you're showing on the outside. 

"L.t," you huff, still struggling for your breath, "I'm doing the best I ca-"

"C'mon, love," he grumbles, eyes settled firmly on the barbell resting across your lap, "You can take more than that."

You're about to dispute that claim, to tell a commanding officer to go fuck himself, but thankfully Johnny 'Soap' McTavish has a habit of running his mouth. His obnoxious laugh bounces off the mirrored walls of the gym, and you can't help but smirk when Ghost's eyes roll back in his head. 

"Johnny-"

"That's a bit crude, ain't it, L.t.?" You can hear the grin on his face before you can see him. 

"Might need to wash your mind out with Soap, Johnny," Simon grumbles, but his joke is lost to the one currently swirling in Johnny's head. The particularly heavy Scottish lilt to his voice tells you he feels pretty proud of whatever gag he's come up with. "Suppose ye could say-"

"Don't you dare, Sargeant." Ghost means it; you can hear it in his voice. He's not playing around. But, sadly for Simon, every day is a play day for Soap, and he advances with his ridiculous comment regardless. 

"That's what she said."

Simon looks ready to kill Soap with his bare hands, grumbling something about dropping a dumbbell on the Scotsman's, quote, 'stupid skull'. 

"Add more weight, Delta," Simon orders you through gritted teeth. 

"It's gonna be harder," you point out, a grin splitting your lips at the double-edged sentence. Soap catches on to your childish innuendo, smirking as he watches Ghost's eye twitch. 

"Focus on me," he insists, trying to get you to ignore Johnny's jibes and concentrate on the task at hand. 

"Naw, L.t., yer suppose'ta grab her chin and make her look in yer eyes as you fuc-"

"Sargeant." He doesn't yell. Ghost's strained voice mumbles Soap's name, but his eyes are like bayonets piercing the resolve of the cheeky Scotsman. Soap looks down to the foam mats beneath his feet, mumbling a quiet 'sorry, L.t.' 

Next, Ghost's livid gaze turns to you. A chill runs down your spine as he leans down and picks up the ridiculously heavy barbell with one hand before dumping it beside you. 

"Leave it. In the changin' room. Now." 

Simon doesn't even need to pull rank. You're up on your shaky legs and scurrying to the changing rooms without a word. Despite his signature silent footsteps, you're almost positive he's hot on your heels. You're only sure when the door slams behind you, the mirrors inside the changing rooms rattling against their fixtures drilled into the wall. 

"Fuckin' come'ere," Simon's hand grabs ar your shoulder, steering you towards the sink. You're tripping over your own feet as he shoves you against it, your chest pressed to the cold shared basin. 

"You're gonna learn to take your Commanding Officer seriously, Delta," he growls in your ear, his chest pressed heavily against your spine as his paw rips down your gym leggings and underwear in one fell swoop. "Insubordination will not be tolerated." 

Your naked lower half is exposed to the door, only shielded by Simon's ginormous hips as he pushes them against your ass. His clothed cock grinds up perfectly against your soaked folds, and you wail at the idea that there will be a wet patch when he steps away. 

"We might get caught. Does that turn you on?" Simon scoffs, the harsh sound coming from him. He punctuates his query with a sudden snap of his wrist, connecting with the soft flesh of your ass in a stinging slap. "Filthy slut."

Despite the apparent punishment, you're rewarded for taking the spank with only a whimper. Simon pushes the waistband of his sweats down, pulling out his ridiculously huge cock and pumping it slowly. Fuck~

"C'mere," Ghost barks again, his hand grasping an almost bruising hold of your hip as he pushes the blunt head of his cock into your slick cunt. You sob out suddenly, nails digging into the ceramic basin of the sink as he splits you open brutally. 

Simon's never rushed you like this. He always takes his time, easing your fluttering pussy open with his fingers. Not this time; he's disciplining you. 

"Fuck- sofuckingtight", he spits out, eyes settled between where your hips meet, "You can take more than that, love. Can see you creamin' 'round my cock already." 

The filthy words pouring from Ghost's mouth make your eyelids quiver, irises glazed over as arousal sweeps your core. He rocks forward again, dick punching into you as your walls finally give way to the intrusion. 

"Hah-HaaFuck-" Ghost groans out, palm slapping at the flesh of your hip as he suddenly fucks hard and sharp into your brutalised cunt. "Thas it- C'mon. Gonna teach you a fuckin' lesson-"

"I'm sorry, Simon!" You choke out, each word coming out in a pathetic wail that already has his cock twitching inside you. The head of his dick bumps your cervix, and each solid thrust has your body jolting up the counter. 

"You fuckin' scream it, love. Let 'im know who you belong to." Let Johnny know he can't have you because you're mine. That's an order. 

"You, Lieutenant-" you cry out, tears slipping down your cheeks as you watch him fuck you from behind in the mirror that rattles on the wall with each sharp punch of his hips, "I belong to you!" 

join the taglist here:

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#simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x f!reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x you #simon ghost riley x y/n #simon riley #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader #simon riley x y/n #call of duty #modern warfare 2 #cod mwii #cod mw2 #ghost cod mw2 #ghost cod mwii #cod ghost #ghost cod #ghost call of duty #simon ghost riley fic #simon ghost riley fanfiction #simon ghost riley smut #simon riley smut #cod mw2 smut #call of duty smut #modern warfare smut #modern warfare 2 smut #1k+ club

[djservo]

base game joaquin: I can't believe this show got cancelled

base game sergio: right? and on such a cliffhanger. who even was the strangler supposed to be??

BG joaquin: the art critic with the mustache

BG sergio: no way

BG joaquin: read between the lines dude it's obvious

BG sergio: you're so full of shit

*aggressive knocking at the door*

BG joaquin: are you expecting someone?

BG sergio: no, are you?

BG joaquin: no....

joaquin: well if isn't the fugly little wannabes

sergio: why does mine look like kurt from glee

BG sergio: I'm metrosexual

sergio: *under breath* jesus christ

BG sergio: do you know them?

BG joaquin: no but the short one has a weird accent

joaquin: BITCH—

sergio: SHUT UP AND LISTEN! we’re starting things from scratch and there’s only enough room for one set of us in this save

joaquin: two of us gotta go and guess what? it’s not gonna be us

BG sergio: we were here first!! why should we leave?

BG joaquin: also his tattoos are dumb and his mole's on the wrong side

joaquin: hey FUCK YOU!!! MY MOLE'S FINE

sergio: people like us better cuz we’re funnier and hotter DUH

BG sergio: hotter? with that gap tooth and unibrow?

sergio: YOU WANNA SAY THAT TO MY FACE??

BG sergio: I literally just did

sergio: .....WELL YOU WANNA SAY IT AGAIN??

BG joaquin: urghhHDH I CAN’T HANDLE TWO SERGIOS YOU BOTH NEED TO SHUT UP

BG sergio: neither can I… so how should we settle this? a race? arm wrestling?

joaquin: naw c’mon ugly sergio, we’re adults. we’re better than those childish games

#this post is sponsored by the extreme violence mod - take ur violence to the EXTREME!! #gif #ts4 #b roll #cw blood

[lychgate]

Hey Lych! First of all I'm still wheezing on your file names. Secooonnnddddd... can you share something about the "random clone fucks" and/or "born to die clones"? Thank you <3

this is pretty fun because i can't even remember what any of these are before i open them and the random clone fucks is actually my most recent wip from a few days ago but born to die clones is like 2 years old and it was a custom shirt i made for me and my buddy:

i didnt know what it was before opening it i thot it was a wip but naw this thing done

#my art #arc trooper echo #arc trooper fives

[takeachillpillshawty]

Rollo Rant

Fuck it, It's gonna be a twst hot take but I gotta say it.

Rollo haters who hate Rollo due to him being based of Frollo from the Disney movies are hypocrites when we have Jamil who is based off Jafar who had an on screen kiss with Jasmine who is 16 while he looks to be in his 40s and the sultan pointed that out when Jafar suggested him marrying Jasmine. But does Jamil get called a pervert for just being based off Jafar? No, you know why? Because he's not Jafar, he's based off of him, Jafar's actions has nothing to do with Jamil period. If we can understand that, why the hate for Rollo? What is the actual genuine hate? 'Well, he tried to kill the yuu and the others' so have the overblots.

And don't use the 'He hates magic users and there fore he is racist against magic people.' Y'all forget Sebek exist and blatantly calls you human in a derogatory way? But naw mans gotta new hair style so he's good. It just frustrates me that people will project actions unto Rollo that he didn't even do? Idia kidnapped the overblots for testing, proceeded to overblot as well and almost releasing the titans to DESTROY THE WORLD, but you'll all be like 'he had a rough childhood, Ortho died because of his actions'. Rollo couldn't save his brother due to not having magic at the time, his guilt slowly turned to a hatred of magic.

And I'm not saying all this because Rollo can do no wrong and he's the best written character in game, no he isn't. He's hypocrite when it comes to his logic, he's a flawed character and so are other characters in twst. We only know Rollo from one event and that's it, we don't see him grow as a person or express his interest or give us more of his personality, it's one event and we take what we can get of his character.

I just wanted to get this off my chest, I'm not bringing down other characters because they're 'worst than Rollo', but wanting to show how ridiculous people mischaracterized Rollo because he's based off of Frollo, we had with him in one event he was in and how hypocritical everyone has been about this. I'm not saying you can't hate Rollo, he's an asshole and I agree but labeling him as some pervert for yuu after one interaction he had, that by the way he showed concern that yuu has to put up with the other boy's nonsense is shocking honestly.

That's all I have to say. I'm sorry this came off as preachy but I really had to get this off my chest.

#twst rant #rollo flamme #twst rollo #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland shitpost

[weebsinstash]

As much as I want to have children by this man, let's take a moment to sip our platonic yandere Miguel juice

-i can't decide which sex he'd be more partial to in a 'child'/you since in the movie there was Gabriella but in the comics he eventually has a son who becomes the next Spiderman but--

-as a girl i just naturally think of a lot of those sorts of gender specific ideas 👉👈 he's this big scary hulking intimidating threat and his "daughter" is the one melting his cold exterior

-doesnt matter if you're a grown ass woman, Miguel sees you struggling to braid your hair and suddenly here he is, full dad mode, doing it for you,and depending on how close you two are, maybe he disguises it with "ugh, stop spending so much time messing around with that. If I do it for you will you get back to work? 🙄", but really it's just your new self proclaimed dad/tio wanting to help braid your hair and help you feel pretty and, oh, how he can fondly remember the last time he helped braid "his daughter's" hair...

-of course this evolves to him just loving to do things with your hair. Braid it, wear it natural, style it, use products on it, hes got you. you were just trying to put your hair in a lazy updo like a ponytail or bun and this man doesn't let you leave until he's got you completely combed out, hair braided with ribbons, and of course this entire time youre awkwardly sitting there in a chair in his absolute cave of a workstation with this gargantuan 6'9 man there, "so how was your day? Staying out of trouble?"

-really I mean. Is stealing other people's kids NOT technically in character for him. You're unfortunate enough to trauma bond with this man and you're never getting rid of him

-you hear Miles Morales call him tio (as in the tio meaning dude) and you jokingly teasingly start calling him tio, which Miguel secretly pretends is the version that means uncle. You're just constantly joking around or looking up at him with these big pouty eyes, "but tio 🥺 can't I PLEASE--" and its like. Lmao people know that if they need to ask Miguel for a favor, that it increases their chances to have you ask in their stead

- I mean, as a female adult abused as a child by my own father, raised by a single mom myself, like...

Reader flinches away when Peter B goes to give you a supportive pat on the back or comes in for a high five after a mission and you force yourself to laugh because you're feeling more than just a little awkward and in the spotlight. "Oh, sorry, that was dumb!" And they eventually get you to kind of anxiously word vomit "my dad used to just kind of, rough me up sometimes when I did something wrong! It-it could've been a lot worse honestly, but, it-it just makes me kinda jumpy around guys sometimes! It's not a big deal, or personal or anything. I'm sorry if I made you feel bad 🥺"

Peter B, Jessica, and Miguel all there as older parental figures and also literal parents, immediately exchange looks and agree like "oh hell naw, don't like that" and you get silently adopted by all three of em right then and there

-if it's a physically abusive father and you're still the victim of abuse, I imagine your dad had some suspicious figures suddenly show up in the middle of the night to terrify and threaten the shit out of him and suddenly you aren't getting as manhandled anymore

-can you imagine, like, you show up to Spider Society one day with a black eye "oh, this? It's, it's nothing. My dad is just, he's about to make police captain and he's really stressed about it is all" cue all your friends mentally high fiving around the table because your abusive piece of shit dad is going to die and you don't even know. When it happens they'll all be "oh no, sweetie, I'm SOOOO sorry :(" meanwhile they're thrilled bc now you don't have any parents and they can weasel in there as your new family, schedule your birthday parties, monopolizing more of your time, things like that

-goddd I just imagine it could become some kind of weird fucked up enmeshed scenario where the structure it's providing for your life is actually good for you meanwhile Miguel is like, retroactively kind of soothing some of his trauma both from his own childhood and what happened with the second universe he broke that it's just like. You're a grown ass adult and this man is tucking you in goodnight and saying "te amo, mija" at the doorway and you bet his ass is going to stand there and not let you sleep until you say it back. He knows you're just absolutely seething at him and he'll still refuse to leave without a grumbling "te amo, papá 🙄"

-He eventually just has you doing so much shit and depending on him so much that it starts to become second nature to you. one day you're in the Society doing one of the odd jobs you're allowed to help with and suddenly you're thinking, "Ugh I actually don't know what to do next, I wish Papá was here to-- WAIT SHIT NO I MEAN MIGUEL--"

-lmaooooo as a non Spanish speaker I keep thinking of how awwwwwful it would be if he actually forces you to learn Spanish. Not inherently because there's anything wrong with Spanish, but, I'm not always smart, and I can just SEE him quizzing your ass, forcing you to have entire conversations in Spanish, always clicking his tongue or chuckling at you when you make a mistake and he just thinks you're so cute struggling to learn 🥰 man hears you're trying to take extra lessons from Miles and he instantly drops everything he's doing to go track the little scamp down. Insert meme "I can forgive being an anomaly but I draw the line at teaching Reader bad Spanish"

-siiiiiiigh eventually the day comes when you're in big danger and you need his help, maybe you disobeyed him and was hanging out with some other Spiders in another dimension when there was a sudden villain attack, and he comes to your rescue as a villain does something dramatic like has a gun to your head or a knife to your neck and the second you see him you're just overwhelmed wirh a sense of relief, calling out for him, calling him dad/tio/papá whatever, and he's just like 😭❤️ pumping his fist internally, like YES you are so grounded when you get back home but also 🥰 you finally called him dad without him having to twist your arm 🥰 nevermind if the "villain" who kidnapped you was actually a Spider who owed him a favor, and this whole thing was to teach you a lesson about listening to your Papá, that's not important ❤️

-Miguel who forces you to learn Spanish vs Miguel who forces you to be Catholic. I can excuse kidnapping and forced adoption but I draw the line at making me practice religion 💀 no but seriously, he probably does have certain morals and values he instills/forces upon you if he thinks you need them, and he'll probably be one of those fathers, "are you leaving the house dressed like that? Go change" and orders you not to hang out with certain people he doesn't approve of or thinks have bad character (like hobie lmao)

-bruh you two will be on a super serious important mission and this man will be like "it's dark, hold my hand so we dont get separated"

Eventually it comes to a point where you're, not perfectly behaved but, just about. If someone finds Miguel, it means you're not very far away, or vice versa. Members of the Society quickly learn not to make any advances on you or make any "adult" comments unless they want to get suspiciously hurt during a personal training session by the big boss himself. You think you're safe just cause Miguel isn't around? Nah, cause then you have Peter B and Jess keeping an eye on you, and, not that YOU'RE aware of the extent, but, if Miguel ever gets worried, he can just ask Lyla what you've been getting up to, since your modified little daypass has her installed into it and she can track your every move ❤️ helicopter parent? Oh honey, you have NO idea...

#yandere miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #yandere x reader #yandere spiderverse #yandere stuff #sinprompts

[shotmrmiller]

fwb! ghost brainrot ive officially decided its gotta turn into ghoap x reader or im gonna eat my flextape. hopefully i can connect this one to the first one. team fix your plotholes or else, perra.

Fwb! Simon who just turned exclusive doesn’t want anyone to know about the two of you. Can’t say it doesn’t sting but as he said, you asked for a fuck, not a boyfriend. You understand because you aren’t sure Johnny would take too kindly to his best friend being disrespected in bed by someone he knows is a bonafide manwhore. 

So when Johnny pulls a pretty woman at the bar y'all are in, he also brings her friend for Simon, and that makes you prickle with jealousy. With a huff, you turn to face the crowd— away from the bitch putting her manicured hands on Simon. You’d like to believe that he is reciprocating her attention because if he doesn’t, Johnny would find it suspicious. But the way he wraps his arm around her waist, flirting back so effortlessly, reminds you of his ways. Of how he is.

Simon isn’t stupid. He wasn’t a part of the elite force Johnny’s in only because of his brawn. He was also brain. And that infuriates you. Talking to Simon is like dealing with a fucking genie.  Better be specific to the minute detail or anything that’s left to assumption is free game. 

Grabbing Johnny’s forearm to get his attention, he doesn’t look at you— too busy sweet-talking his next conquest, so you dig your nails into his skin. You see him wince and pull away roughly to sneer at the offender, but then his features smooth out instantly, once he realizes it’s you. Ice-blue eyes slightly unfocused from the alcohol in his system, yet it feels like all he can see is you. His reaction makes your heart skip a beat, how quickly he ignores everything around him— puts everything on the backburner if you need something from him. You can't help the pleased smile that curls your lips at the realization.

“Hey, Johnny boy. I’ma go pay the tab,” and then you flick your eyes to the woman, “ do not leave without me.” 

“Dinnae worry, hen, as if I’d ever leave ye anywhere.” Your smile turns gloriously smug when you see the woman look at you in undisguised contempt. Blessed be Johnny, always in your corner. With another squeeze to his forearm, you chuckle when you hear a “Claws in, kitten!” and move to get up when you notice Simon no longer flirting with miss thing, but intently looking at Johnny’s forearm, which still has the half-moon marks of your nails on it. His gaze then snaps to yours, with an almost knowing glint behind them.

You roll your eyes and briskly walk to the bartender, flagging him down. When the bartender gives you the receipt to sign, a voice asks if he can buy you a drink. Sighing, you turn around to tell whoever that you aren’t interested.

“Incredibly generous, but—” and freeze. “Long time no see, eh?” 

It’s your ex. You ended things amicably enough— surprising, for him having been your first boyfriend, first everything, really.  Y’all just outgrew each other emotionally. Hugging him, you exclaim, “Jesus Christ, how’ve you been! It’s been far too long. What’re you doin’ here?” 

He responds, “I was just in town and figured I could get a drink, maybe some company,” you don’t miss the implication of that, but choose to ignore it. 

“How’s that goin’ for ya?”, and then he reaches out to grab your wrist and runs his thumb over your knuckles. “I’ve got you now, don’t I? You look fantastic.” You’re about to let him down lightly when your hand is snatched out of his, and you’re forcibly pulled against someone, strong arm over your shoulders. 

“Whatever ye wan’ with her, the answer is naw. ” Johnny. You smother the slight pang of disappointment in your chest, how silly of you to think it could’ve been Simon. 

“Forever the guard dog, eh, John?” and Johnny’s arm tightens almost painfully and snarls.

“Still around, are ye? Just like a roach, boy.” Johnny and your ex never got along— always a pissing contest.  You have an inkling that it’s because of how close you two were and still are.

Your ex scoffs loudly at him, then looks at you. “It’s your choice, unless you’ve got a boyfriend?” and you shake your head. Johnny pulls you to stand in front of him, both arms holding you close.

“She doesnae. No one’s good enough fer her. Including ye.” 

Sucking your teeth, you sink your nails into Johnny’s forearm, again. “I think that’s for me to decide, no?” and pull at his arms to release you. “You’ve got some nerve, Johnny, bringing me here just to watch you and Ghost—” when you’re roughly pulled to the side,  held down by a much larger body. Simon. Your heart hammers in your chest. How long has he been standing here?

He lowers his mouth to your ear and sternly says, “Behave, pet. The sergeant said no. End of story.” 

When he uses that voice, all you can do is obey. 

“And who’re you?” You can feel Simon stand to his full height, broad shoulders straightening, posturing. Even slouched, he towered over your ex but standing like this, exuding strength and authority, it’s almost comical how large of a difference there is between them two— especially with you in his arms.

“I’m guard dog number two,” and your ex pales slightly. “I’d fuck off,” and Simon points towards the exit with his head, “Now.” He stiffens for a second, eyes bouncing between Johnny and Simon, and bolted—like prey after detecting predators. Not even a goodbye. You don't know if to applaud his sense of self-preservation or curse his cowardice. 

Johnny grabs your hand and leads you out the door, slinging his arm over you as y’all walk towards his home.

“Yer not mad, are ye?” and you keep quiet, he has always hated the silent treatment. “Bonnie—” and Simon cuts him off. 

“Who was that?” and Johnny looks back to answer. “Her ex-boyfriend. Very first one, wasn’t he, hen?” You dig your elbow into his ribcage and hiss out, “Johnny, you dolt! There is no need for you to be sharing that!” 

He laughs and brings your head in to kiss your temple. “I’m jus’ sayin’! Hen, no one out here is worth yer time. Ye cannae be mad at me for speakin’ the truth.” Exhaling, you curl your arm around his waist, going under his shirt to squeeze his waist. 

“Yeah, yeah. Guess I’ll just have to fill the void with you,” and Johnny swiftly continues your sentence. “And Ghost.” 

Absentmindedly, you nod. “And Ghost.” 

-

Had you been paying attention, you would’ve seen the way he and Ghost shared a calculated look before Johnny pressed another kiss a little closer to your mouth.

#call of duty #simon ghost riley #johnny soap mactavish #cod mw2 #cod mwii #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x reader #johnny soap mctavish x reader #john soap mactavish #john soap mctavish x reader #john soap mctavish x you