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welcometothejianghu · 5 months

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Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 少年歌行/The Blood of Youth

The Blood of Youth is a 2022 live-action adaptation of the tale of a deposed, disabled, and incredibly cunty prince who's on his way back to settle the score with his asshole father, and the rag-tag band of weirdos he accumulates along the way, including Spear Girl, Bad Monk, and Fire Puppy (pictured above).

I hope you like shounen anime, because this is the most shounen anime something is allowed to be without actually being based on something running weekly in Shounen Jump. What if Nirvana in Fire were also Naruto? It would be the Blood of Youth.

This show is an underrated gem of action-packed fun that not nearly enough people in English-speaking fandom have seen. In an attempt to correct that -- and ahead of an announced second season and prequel in progress -- I'm here with five reasons you should try it out.

1. Zero thoughts head empty

You do not have to pay an enormous amount of attention to this show to understand what's going on. The show itself does not always know what's going on. It got distracted by a shiny object over there, and now we're all gearing up to go punch the shiny object. We'll get back to the main plot when we're done with the punching.

It has a million billion plot threads going on at any given moment. Bad guys roll in from sects you've never heard of before, using superpowers with stupid names, only to get kicked into next week. There's approximately eleventy thousand characters -- so many, in fact, that I ran into problems several times while making this rec post, because there aren't readily available photos of everyone I want to talk about. Just look at the DramaWiki cast list. See how it goes on for like fifty screens? That's a little what the show feels like.

Except I'm not saying that like it's a bad thing, because the show knows it's doing this, and it acts accordingly. It telegraphs pretty well who's important and who isn't (and then it goes out of its way to color-code the latter, which is handy). What you're left with is absolutely a manga-style plot, complete with training arcs and semi-relevant sidequests, all working up to the final boss match.

It is an extremely self-aware show. On multiple occasions, something would happen, I would crack a joke about it, and then a beat later the show itself would make the exact same joke. I wouldn't call it an outright comedy, but it's still very funny, and on purpose. It has no illusions about being some kind of profound, meaningful epic. Mostly it's just here for a good time.

Yet this lightheartedness is what makes the powerful emotional parts really powerful by contrast. The show is not stupid; it's just goofing around most of the time. When it knuckles down, it can be devastating. And you know what? It does wind up being profound and meaningful about some stuff. How about that.

So yeah, if you're up for something that bops merrily right along and only occasionally rips your heart out, here you go!

2. Putting the poly in polycule

Bisexuals, rejoice! It's representin' time!

Here you go, I made a relationship chart of about 40% of the show's potential and canonical ships. I could have included so many more, but I only had so much space on the image, so I had to leave out some amazing ones, like the sword hedgehog who's real into this one cougar who could easily wipe the floor with him, or the rich nerd who thinks he has a chance with the aforementioned hot butch, or the fancy MILF who cheated on the emperor with a dreamy jianghu man and is trying not to cheat on him again with a different, slightly less dreamy jianghu man. See? There's just so much.

I would also say these are not exclusive ships. They are extremely inclusive ships. I am a fan of most (though admittedly not all) of the pairings listed here, and in fact of many of the three-and-more-somes indicated by these lines. They're such a cuddle puddle of shared intense feelings that it's hard to imagine anyone getting more than mildly jealous. Moreover, the potential for romance does not get in the way of hetero friendships; a boy and a girl who are each dating other people can go do adventures together, and (mostly) nobody gets weird about it, which is nice. If anything, what makes the overall dynamic so polycule-like is how equally friends and love interests get treated, meaning that it's not difficult to see a lot of crossover potential between those two categories.

If you're like me, you're hesitant about canonical romance, especially when it's straight, mostly because so many straight love stories wind up being tiresome, gross, and/or skull-poundingly boring. You will then be pleasantly surprised by how the canon pairings with members of the main cast are not like this at all!

Xiao Se and Sikong Qianluo are the main textual romance, and golly gee, they're just cute as heck. As the chart above indicates, I like interpreting them as two Kinsey 6's who have found their single exceptions, Mulder-and-Scully-style. Maybe one of the best things about their relationship is that it gets sidelined all the time for the plot. They're not so busy being in love that they forget to get shit done. Then they get a bit of downtime and get to go on a date, and you're like, aww, those sweet gay disaster babies are gonna do a little bit of heterosexuality. Just precious.

Tang Lian and Fairy Rui are right up there with the cuteness. She's a sex-positive dancing beauty who wants to ride that pretty boy like she stole him, and he's a shy sword boy so tightly bottled up that he'll explode if he sees a bare ankle. Avoiding spoilers, I will simply say that this is a pairing of two relatively soft people, until a bad thing happens to one of them and the other hardens up about it. If that's your jam, they're here for you.

Lei Wujie and Ye Ruoye are probably the most magical and the most practical of the bunch. They have a beautiful, super-dreamy, really horny sword-dance meet-cute, complete with its own pop song ... and then that's it, they're basically just together. She likes him, he likes her, good for them. In-laws aside, it's a refreshingly low-drama situation. Besides, I always love it when the hypercompetent woman gets the sweet, devoted himbo who'd do anything for her. Ruoye's had a hard life, and she deserves someone who can dick her down good at night and make her a nourishing breakfast the next morning.

And then there is, of course, The Ship:

Xiao Se and Wuxin are canonical, textual soulmates. The show treats their dynamic as more important than any other. It's so important, in fact, that the show has to sideline Wuxin for huge parts of the drama, lest everything get too damn gay. They each get a boyfriend catch on the other. They both do fairly reckless things when the other is in trouble. They are the secret hidden happy ending to the series. They share the kind of ride-or-die relationship built on mutually being the hugest bitches in any given room. Whether or not you think this is romance, it is extremely romantic, and the series agrees as much as it can, all things considered.

And if none of those flavors of love float your boat? Well, have you considered ... eunuchs?

3. She likes e4e

So I'm on record as being real into eunuch characters, right? Well, if you're with me on that, you are in for a treat here, because these are some absolutely buck-wild eunuchs.

There's five main ones, and I can't even begin to scratch the surface of what's going there. Like, really, I don't even think I understood all of what was happening with them. They're kind of the bad guys, but then they're kind of the good guys, but then some of them are the bad guys, but then they're just working for the bad guys, but then they screw over the bad guys, and ... it's just a lot, okay? It's a lot, and it's all happening with this bunch of catty bitches.

Also, you would not believe the difficult time I had finding any images for this section. I guess for some reason, fandom isn't way into a bunch of canonically dickless color-coordinated middle-aged men in weird hats? Whatever, man, they are missing out. If, however, you have the good sense to be into the intense and complicated (semi-romantic??) relationships among colleagues who also professionally just happen to be missing their external genitalia, buddy, strap in (and maybe strap on, depending).

Don't let me oversell how much these guys are in the show. They're not. They're vaguely important at points throughout, and they become incredibly important near the end, but they're hardly main characters. They're mostly back at the palace, doing their various schemes and looking absolutely fantastic.

So if they're such a minor part of the story, why do they get their own selling point? Well, I think their presence is a good example of two specific things about the show:

Specific thing the first: It's so queer -- not gay, but queer. Thinking back to my last selling point, you will notice how many of those straight pairings may look normie on the outside, but once you get down to it are not playing by cishet rules. (For instance, I've seen a lot of people read Tang Lian's resistance to sexual advances as asexuality, which, sure!) Likewise, there are lots of incredibly important, intimate relationships that don't conform to standard romantic pair dynamics. Add to that a lot of bodies with unusual characteristics and conditions, and you've got the makings of plenty of delightful non-normative love stories.

Specific thing the second: There are so many things going on with so many side characters that there's a kink here for everyone. Don't care for eunuchs? How about slinky villains with mind-control powers? Devoted servants who would do anything for their masters? Former bad guys who owe life-debts to the good guys who saved them? Bonded pairs traipsing around the jianghu together? Sons nursing legitimate grudges against the men who killed their fathers? Alcoholic widowers with incredibly slutty necklines? Mysterious cross-dressers with unconvincing moustaches? Vengeful brides? Martial siblings? Murderous royals? Guilt-ridden half-siblings? Boring star-crossed lovers? All these and more! It's a smorgasbord of rarepair fuel!

Also, I just love these toxic drama queens. It's like if RuPaul's Drag Race had the authority to have you executed.

4. The most intriguing outfits I've ever seen in anything (and yes, I'm including Winter Begonia)

Time for a fashion show!

The asymmetrical fits, the detailed embroidery on everything, the brilliant colors -- everybody just looks so good. And yet everything still looks ... eh, I don't know if "practical" is the word I want, but at least wearable. Nobody's dragging ten-foot trains of fabric behind them or wrapped in eighty floofy layers of gauze (except Rui, but she's special). Their outfits are strange and elaborate, but they don't defy physics.

What's truly stunning is how often they get new outfits. Xiao Se alone changes clothes about once every other episode, and more if he's getting a flashback. He is the fashion plate of the whole series, and every look he serves is pitch-perfect.

They're not outright color-coded, but the main characters do have certain colors associated with them -- which is extra-fun when you watch those colors bleeding into their friends' clothes as their relationships get stronger. I also think -- and I'm willing to be proven wrong on this point, but I think I'm right -- that they recycle some characters' outfits into parts of other characters' outfits. On more than one occasion, I'd swear that Lei Wujie shows up wearing the left half of something Xiao Se was wearing a few episodes back (tailored to fit him, of course, because that dumb ponytail boy is tall).

Where I think the costume design gets massive points, though, is that the costumes are themselves adaptations.

Before the live-action series, there was a 2018 3D animated donghua. I have never watched the latter, but apparently the drama is intensely faithful to the animated visuals, to the point where some fights are shot-for-shot remakes.

Of course, you can do a lot more with unreal clothing and bodies in animation -- and you can show a lot more skin, at least according to Chinese content laws. The live-action costumers chose to preserve about as many of the appearance beats from the donghua as they could manage, while still accepting the limitations of real-life bodies and materials. You can see some side-by-side comparisons here. The live-action outfits manage to be instantly recognizable without being slavishly devoted recreating to their inspirations.

So if you're sick and tired of dreary, ill-lit shows with bland palettes, this vibrant, colorful drama may be just the thing for you. It's a rainbow from start to finish.

5. Actually a good central plot?

Despite all the wacky delightful shounen nonsense that this show has -- and it has a lot -- the core of the whole narrative, which is Xiao Se's story, is surprisingly great and cohesive.

The short version is this: Xiao Se used to be Xiao Chuhe, sixth prince and somewhat heir apparent. Then he and his jerk-ass dad had a falling-out that resulted in the prince's having his martial arts abilities all but taken from him. He's been living the life of a very well-dressed innkeeper for several years, trying to avoid all of that palace garbage. But now his jerk-ass dad is dying, which means that a lot of horrible decisions are finally having unfortunate consequences for everyone, and Xiao Se's got to get back in there to make sure everything does not go to shit and land someone terrible on the throne -- even if it has to mean taking it himself.

His central conflict is between what he used to be and what he's become. Does he miss being Xiao Chuhe, high-ranked martial artist and future emperor? Or is he happier being Xiao Se, long-suffering nobody who can barely run a business, much less hold his own in a fight? What would he be willing to do to get back what he's lost? What are his obligations to himself versus his obligations to everyone else? How much is he responsible for his father's bullshit? And why has he wound up having to babysit this stupid Fire Puppy?

It's okay, they're best friends now. Lei Wujie decided.

No spoilers, but I liked Xiao Se's ending a lot. I feel it's very true to the character and shows a real understanding of who he is and what he values. And really, at the end of the day, sometimes all you need for a happy ending is your girlfriend, your girlfriend's girlfriend, your girlfriend's girlfriend's boyfriend who's also your boyfriend, your other boyfriend, his girlfriend, and your long-distance for-real soulmate.

Feel like giving the youths a try?

You can find them on YouTube or on Viki. But be absolutely sure that no matter where you watch it, you make sure to go watch the epilogue as well. (And if you get real into the story, well, here's a link to information about all the other adaptations.)

You are also welcome for how I did not spend this post going off for five hundred years on how much I love Wuxin and his funky relationship to Buddhism. I figured that's way too niche of a selling point for most people, and might indeed have even been counterproductive. But know that I could have.

Also, I'm very happy about the announcement of a second season, because that's going to mean Liu Xueyi has to shave his head again, and he looks unbearably good with a shaved head.

Oh yeah, did I forget to mention the whole motorcycle photoshoot?

In case you hadn't noticed, the whole cast is stupidly hot. Hachi machi.

#the blood of youth #少年歌行 #bloody youths #i made this #rec post #the party is a polycule #LeiDHD

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devil-doms · 2 years

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If the Brothers forgot about you

(referring to my other post)

TW/CW: harm/abuse, angst, yelling, them acting like demons (if you need more TWs please let me know)

note: i had a tough time writing asmo and beel, so they might be a little out of character

Solomon was over as usual to teach you a new spell. This one was a request from you, a memory loss spell. You were curious if you could make Lucifer forget about your punishment for failing a test.

Just as you were about to cast the spell, Solomon was requested by Simeon to hurry to the Celestial Realm for there had be an emergency. Solomon tells you to wait till he gets back to try the spell, since you won’t be able to reach him for a bit.

After an hour you grow impatient and decide to do the spell yourself, I mean how bad could it go?

Lo and behold you messed up bad, real bad.

After casting the spell everyone in the house grew super sleepy, falling asleep where they were. After you woke up, you did your daily morning routine. But when you finally made it to the dining room, everyone was staring at you with confusion...

Lucifer:

"How did a human get in here? Who are you?" Lucifer asked, "How did you get in here?"

"What do you mean? This isn’t the type of joke you would do." It hit you, Lucifer isn't the type to play jokes, definitely not something like this.

Lucifer stood up, pushing the table back a little bit, "This isn't a game, when I ask who you are, you answer me."

“Wait, do you not know who I am?"

"If I did I wouldn't be asking these questions, now would I? I'm done repeating myself." He starts approaching you, raven-esuqe wings sprout from his back. You panic and look at the other brothers for help, hoping they would tell him to stop. But they don't, they stay silent and resume their breakfast.

Lucifer grabs your arm and starts dragging you to the stairwell, "When I ask you something you answer me, when you want to cause problems you will be punished. A human like you will be lucky to survive the punishments I give."

You panic more, trying to think of things to make him realize he's made a mistake, "Lucifer, come on, its me...I know…that you locked Belphie in the attic because he was a threat, you like your tea on the bitter side...and you're so strict because you want to protect your brothers, you love them."

Lucifer stops abruptly, "How do you know that..." "Because I was here, I live here, we're family..." You say, still trembling with fear.

He presses his fingers against his temple and sighs, "I will speak with Lord Diavolo about this and see what he says about the whole ordeal. If it comes up that you're lying, you will be punished accordingly." To be honest, he really didn't want to punish you, something about it felt wrong.

Mammon:

"How much do ya think they can sell for? We don't get humans down here, its organs should make me a nice profit." He stands up and starts poking and prodding at your body, counting your organs, "Cha-ching, this is a walking money bag right here."

"Very funny." You say sarcastically, thinking it was just Mammon goofing around again.

"Hush, money shouldn't be talkin. I'll deal with ya later." He sits back down at the table to continue eating. A rush of sadness came over you, why would he say something like that? You follow him to the table, "What does that mean?"

Mammon sighs, refusing to make eye contact with you, "I ain't takin care of some human, definitely one like yourself, leave me alone."

Your furrow your eyebrows, "Do you seriously not know me?"

"..."

You lightly shove him, "Answer me!"

He quickly stands up, towering over you. Bat-like wings came out of his back. You felt so tiny, so weak underneath him. You're overwhelmed, your vision begins to get cloudy from tears and you feel them roll down your face, "You know me..." You quietly say.

Mammon's anger quickly turned to sympathy, there was something about you that he recognized, he couldn't bring himself to hurt you, "Somethin's not right, you remind me of someone..."

Levi:

You stare at Levi, after all the weird occurrences that have happened in this house, he should know what’s going on.

"Why are you looking at me? Do you think some otaku like me can't harm you? I can do it, I'll summon Lotan right now-"

You quickly shake your hands at him, "No, no that's not necessary."

He glared at you, "Of course its not, nothing I do is necessary." He gets up from his seat, “I’m going back to my room.” He walks away, taking his food with him.

Did he...not recognize you...? Before any of the other brothers could speak to you, you ran to Levi's room. You knocked on the door, "The second lord." You said, then patiently waited for him to open it.

He cracks his door, "How did you know...?"

"Because we're friends...can I come in...?"

He sighs and opens the door enough for you to slip in, quickly shutting it behind him, "I don't have friends, and I wouldn't even want to be friends with some human normie...”

“Levi…”

“I'm not the type to have loads of friends, I'm not Satan, I'm not Asmo, I'm just some worthless otaku!" You can feel the envy radiating off his body, his hands become fists, you watch him turn into his demon-self.

He walks towards you, arms trembling, "I'm not deserving of it, and you shouldn't be either." Your body is pressed against the wall, there is nowhere to go. You do the only thing you can think of doing, and grasp his hands, interlocking your fingers. He pauses, he's taken aback, "I recognize...your touch..."

Satan:

“Satan, why are you looking at me like that?” You ask, standing in place. Something was telling you not to get near the table.

“Why are talking to me like we’re friends, I don’t know you.”

“Yeah, you do, why’re you acting like that?”

“Who are you to tell me what I do and do not know, you are but a mere insignificant human. You do not know me.” His glare pierced through your heart.

He stood up, "I don’t know why you’re here, the human exchange program ended a year ago, you're not apart of that. You don't matter, I could tear you limb from limb and it wouldn't matter." A green aura surrounded him, he was gonna transform.

You gulp hard, you know that this wasn’t an empty threat. He could if he really wanted to, “You know me…we’re family.”

“Is that so? How are we family if I don’t even know of your existence?” He walks over to you and gets right in your face, waiting for your answer.

“I…I know that you want to be your own person, you hate living in Lucifers shadow. But, you are your own person! You’re quick witted, composed, you tend to overthink things-” You stop when he grabs your wrists, but with a trembling voice you continue, “You…you butt heads with Lucifer, but you really look up to him, you love him.”

Satan grips your wrists tighter, but he’s at loss for words. When he makes eye contact with you, he sees the fear he’s invoked and loosens his grip, letting you go. Something clicked, he messed up, he wasn’t supposed to hurt you, “I’m…sorry…”

Asmo:

"Ohhhhhh~ a human, you can be my new plaything! Come over here and look into my eyes, I want to seduce you."

You were confused but approached him anyways, “You know that seduction doesn’t work for me.”

His eyes widen, “I do? Ahhhh it must be because you’ve already fallen for me then! My powers must be stronger.”

“Do you…not know me…?”

“Of course not, I think I would remember a cute little human like you.” He places a hand on your arm and slowly rubs it.

You back away from him, “I don’t know if this is some new fetish of yours, but stop.”

He raises an eyebrow, “Dear, I don’t think you know who I am. I, the Avatar of Lust, can always seduce people.” He gets up from his chair, horns slowly start growing out of his head.

You panic and shout, “Asmo, stop!”

Just like that, he did, “I’ve made a pact with you…who are you?”

Beel:

"Who are you? If you came here to harm my family I will not hesitate to make you into a feast."

“Wh…why would you think that I was hear to harm you…?” You ask, “You know it’s me right…?”

“I don’t. You are intruding. Leave us.” He returns back to his food.

You stand in silence, not sure what to do. He was pushing you away, “Beel…come on…” He still doesn’t reply, he looks up at Belphie with an annoyed look on his face.

“Beel…”

He stands up quickly, the chair falling behind him, “Do I need to show you the door?” You flinch and he grabs your arm, escorting you to the front of the house.

“Beel please, I’m family, I…I protected you and Luke…I got Belphie out of the attic…” He grips you tighter, increasingly becoming more frustrated with you. Something was off to him though, but he ignored it, assuming it was only because he was hungry, “You’re hurting me…”

Beel glances down at you notices the tears streaming down your face, something in his brain clicked. He shouldn’t be doing this, he knows you. He lets go of your arm, he can already see the indentation he’s left on it.

He holds your hand, his voice filled with sympathy, “I have the feeling that I’m supposed to protect you…I’m sorry to have let you down.”

Belphie:

He was the only one of the brothers who didn’t look different, since he always looks annoyed.

“Belphie…?”

He sneers at you, “Do you mind? You’re lucky I’m too tired to kill you right now.”

Belphie was always cold, but threatening you like this was quite insensitive.

He raises his voice, “Heed my warning stupid human, that means leave.” But you don’t leave, you stand there, what’s he gonna do? Kill you again? There’s no way the brothers would allow it.

“Is every human this stupid…?” You feel a tail grace past your leg, you look down and see it slowly wrapping around your ankle. You try to back up, realizing you may have made a mistake, but his tail holds your leg in place.

When you look back up you’re met eye to eye with the demonic version of the Avatar of Sloth, and he was not happy. “Belphie, please, it’s me…”

“I don’t know you.” He reaches for your neck, wrapping both hands around it. You place your hands on top of his, trying to pry him off. He slowly lifts you, just enough to where your toes barely reach the ground. Your eyes dart around the room, waiting for the brothers to help, but they don’t. They act like nothing is going on.

You’re weakly hitting him now, maybe to knock some sense into him, but nothing is working. Your vision starts getting spotty, but before it could go black, he drops you. You land on your ass and quickly back away from him.

You watch as he stands there motionless, staring at his hands. He then drops to his knees, “I can’t…I can’t hurt you, something within me is stopping me. I cant help but feel that you’re important to me…”

Conclusion

Eventually Solomon came back and explained the situation to the brothers. Solomon scolded you for not waiting to do the spell, while Lucifer scolded the both of you for doing it in the first place.

Even if it was technically your doing for casting the spell, the brothers couldn’t help but feel horrible for the way they treated you. It was apologies after apologies for a bit. As well as something they’ll most likely reflect on.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #💜#obey me angst

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unexpectedbrickattack · 1 year

Note

Now hold on a gosh-diddly-darn minute, I noticed the entire time talking about a tipsy Peppino no one thought to ask this but what about tipsy GUS? I mean we saw him a li'l tipsy in the fastfood saloon escape, can I hear your thoughts about that/him please? Have they ever gotten tipsy together?

(I just like the mental image of the two alone, just being real giggly with each other (Gus just says "hey" and Peppi starts giggling which sets Gus off giggling) and being sappy goofs with each other <3)

HEEHEE u are so right and i am so sorry for withholding this information from the masses 😭

My homebrew for gnomes is that they are simultaneously hardy folk (able to eat virtually anything and immune to most poisonous creatures) AND extremely intolerant of alcohol. Theres no reason for that, i just like it alot :)

So Gus would be an extreme lightweight 😭 its SO bad; he cant speak clearly at all, he cant walk straight, he has the Worst hangovers and he wont remember anything from the previous night. The line between ‘pleasantly buzzed’ and ‘blackout drunk’ is so thin that Gus doesnt even try social drinking. If he MUST drink, it will be in the comfort of his own barebones apartment 😭 at least, until Peppino started hanging out with vigilante and his crew.

Gustavo LIKES drinking! Its just hard to find a good balance, and THATS bc he simply doesnt know how alcohol works. Peppino is like:

“Look ‘ere. All of these have a number somewhere on the bottle. Or a percentage. Lower the number, the better it is for you.”

Gustavo is like !!! Oh!!! That is very helpful! What would you recommend for me then?

“Probably…2-5%. 5-10 proof. Small 'a numbers.”

Gustavo nods, interested. He points at a bottle he recognizes from the last time he came here and got shitfaced. “That one up there; do you know how ‘a strong that one is? Or should i ask the bartender?”

Peppino squints at the company label. “45%.”

“Oh!” That makes sense. “Well what do you usually drink?”

“70%.”

“Oh!”

Peppino recommends some of the LIGHT light wines, the ones that barely have a hint of anything. Theyre sweet (which Gustavo loves so very very much) and for the first time in a very long time, he Stays buzzed instead of immediately faceplanting into being blackout drunk.

Hes very. Playful. Is what Peppino would describe a tipsy Gustavo. He hesitates to use the term ‘flirty’ because that is not whats happening. But hes like. Clearly entertaining some gruff looking men like five times his size as they ramble drunkenly about random shit like ‘waow….thasso cool…and then what happened???’

Its funny at first bc Gustavo is so fucking TINY that all you can see of him, in the group of men as they yapyapyap about some inane shit that Gustavo wont even remember, is his tiny little tail 😭 It is less funny, however, when Peppino catches himself rambling about work and Gustavo is like (ears perked; tail swaying) ‘mmhmm. wrow…thats ‘a kinda nice…what else did you do??’ Peppino is like *buffering* (‘something is happening right now that will need to be addressed at a later time. Do not forget DO NOT FORGET. URGENT!!!!’)

Otherwise Gustavo is just a silly guy. Vigilante will make a joke and he laughs so low and deep that he sounds downright villainous 😭 Peppino will point out something stupid on the TV and like hours later Gus is like ‘…heeeuehuuueee…..do u remember [insert stupid reference] and Peppino will giggle. Peppinos affinity for throwing around ilus are met with Gustavo going ‘😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊’ with absolutely no way to even pretend to mask it.

Gustavo has fun being out in the saloon but he really enjoys drinking in Peppinos house. Its not nearly as loud as the saloon and theres usually homecooked foods like breads and soups (Because Peppino stress-cooks ALL the time). Brick gets to stay indoors instead of waiting outside the saloon, so Gustavo gets to mess with his soft fur contentedly. He just gets to be cozy; its quite nice 😊

#answered #chattin #///#////#/////#gustavo #peppino #pepstavo #alcohol #drinking #i still have to answer that anon asking about pepstavo hcs so i hope this helps a little fhjdbdjdndkd #additional context is that; gnomes stay mostly in the forest. so theres not alot of outsider influence #gustavos a bit of a traveller; he likes exploring and seeing whats outside the forest. and he usually comes back with goodies #alcohol is just one of those things he tried during a trip or two and it always fucked him up #never looked into it; some shit is best left alone lmao #unrelated to that #but the alt though that peppino had; i was going to say (something el gee bee tee is happening…)#which made me laugh but i cant make him say stuff like that fhdjbdjdjdjd #also note that Gustavo does not drink often at all; he will accompany peppino to the saloon and let him get tipsy w his friends #he will entertain their silly shenanigans and bring Peppino home when theyre done #and if hes hanging out at peppinos house he will lounge around listening to peppino blabber about nothing #and drink some ciders :)#he only drinks like. 10% of the time. hes a social drinker but ONLY when he feels like it #and ONLY if peppino is with him #ALSO ALSO #IMPORTANT #you must know that Gustavo is NEVER sitting while in the saloon #he is standing on his barstool w his hands on the countertop

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words-without-rules · 22 days

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So, last night my partner and I were goofing around and looking at MK1 Characters on Mortal Kombat Warehouse, looking at the skins n stuff. Then he decided to start downloading some of the character renders and editing them in IBS and the results were... well, let me just show you 🤣 (he gave them all names as well because he made them into Discord emojis)

First we have:

ChadJohnny 🤣

Next we have:

ShangHuh 🤣🤣🤣 I LOST MY MIND AT THIS ONE WHAT ON EARTH DID HE DO TO MY BOY??????

Oh but it gets better:

This one is called 'Bigbrainmoment' 🤣🤣 Very fitting for him, I admit

As is:

Biangy 🤣😭🤣😭🤣😭🤣😭🤣😭🤣😭🤣

This next one is so cursed but also so good:

It's just called 'FACKYOUUUUU' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I DONT KNOW WHY I CAN IMAGINE HIM SAYING THAT SO PERFECTLY!!!!! 😭😭😭😭

Oh God the one after this. Is. My. Fucking. FAVORITE:

Three words: 'ShangTsungsGYAAT' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY ITS SO FUNNY ITS SO DUMB!!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Oh God and then he made this one (im so sorry in advance):

...Yeah, the less said about this one the better, I think. It's just called: 'uwu' 🤣😭🤣😭🤣😭😭😭

We're down to the last 3, but they're all gems in my opinion:

Here we have 'GiggaKuai' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Im sorry, Kuai, but it had to be done 🤣😭

Actually this next one might be my true favorite, just because it personally gives me so much joy:

It's 'QuanCHEESE' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 This has been an inside joke between me and my partner for such a long time, so seeing it fully visualized at last... A true masterpiece :')

And now, last but not least:

'Nobitches' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 This one was actually my idea. I can so hear him saying something like this 🤣🤣🤣

That's all for now, thank the Elder Gods lmao I was literally begging him to stop towards the end because my cheeks were starting to hurt so bad 🤣🤣🤣

#mortal kombat 1 #mk1 #mortal kombat #memes #mk1 memes #cursed images #mk1 edits #johnny cage #shang tsung #bi-han #sub-zero #liu kang #tomas vrbada #smoke #kuai liang #scorpion mk1 #quan chi #shao kahn

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cerealandchoccymilk · 1 year

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Trigun Bookclub: Trigun Vol.1, Chapter #03

previous | all | next

More Trigun annotations! I'm doing a deep-read of the Japanese original print (reread) and Overhaul 1.0 (first read) side-by-side, and writing down everything I notice from small details, version differences, translation differences, etc. (and being so so gay about the characters. of course)

As always, here are the non-analysis panels of my dear babygirl (+ memes)...

And the rest is under the cut. i am living in ur brain now <3

[link for if the images aren’t in horizontal rows]

Starting off with the chapter cover of our handsome boy, this is the first time we see him with his glasses! I've seen someone on Twitter make a guide on Vash's different glasses designs over the manga (sadly it either cost money or was only distributed at a con and I don't have it...), so I'll try to pay attention to that during this readthrough.

As I've mentioned in the previous chapter, his antennae used to stand straight up, but they're bent now! They pop back up once in a while but from here on, the default is bent.

I love how gently he sets the girl down, and also the way everyone waits in awkward silence (and confusion) for Vash to move the rubble.

I think this part works excellently as-is, but notes on the nuances of what Nebraska originally said (this was ridiculously hard and the translation is very rough):

①「絶対どこかで不都合を並べた奴を消して来てるのさ」 ②「なぜなら」 ③「現におまえは消される側にまわってねえ……！！」 ↓ ① There has to have been a time when you "eliminated" ("erased"/killed) someone that got in your way (/someone unfortunate enough to [be there]...etc). ② Because... ③ In reality, you haven't taken on the role ("side") of being eliminated...!!

This part's very hard... He's talking about something similar to offense/defense. In this case, it's that because Vash has been avoiding conflict/being in direct danger entirely, Nebraska is saying that Vash must have killed, directly or indirectly, someone who got in the way of Vash's fleeing. I think.

I'm not sure why, but the way this was phrased stuck out to me.

Also, Gofsef's fist had an extra knuckle for one panel.

A translation error - it should be something like "He shot every bullet into the same precise spot... And shifted its trajectory!?"

Vash says "JACKPOT!" in English here, in the Japanese version. also hes soooo handsomeeeeee look at him omgggg kicking my legs back n forth blushing giggling i need to be tranquilized.

Nebraska's straight-up being crushed into pieces here. goddamn.

Not sure if it was removed in one of the reprints or in Overhaul's cleanup process, but in my Japanese copy, there was a "thump" onomatopoea of the guy backing into a wall.

Milly and Meryl are the best comedy duo in the world... They're perfect... The tiny speech bubble actually says something like "They're goofing all over the place..." The word ボケ (boke) is the funny man in a manzai comedy duo (as opposed to the straight man), and/or the jokes that the person in that role makes.

YIPPEE!! (In Japanese, it's one continuous exclamation ↑ like so. Also, there are tiny music notes around the handwritten text in the wahoo speech bubble.)

Vash runs out of breath after celebrating (cleaned up in Overhaul). God he's so silly...

A small error - I would phrase Meryl's line as "[Now, now,] Don't get too ahead of yourself."

I love how in Japanese, Meryl calls Vash "a very dangerous person with chronic troublemaker disease (慢性トラブル症)." I'm saying this from now on.

She also sarcastically says that she's grateful of the stars' alignment that they were able to meet, while gorilla gripping Vash's hand.

Also, I never noticed how fucked up Nebraska's body was!? Maybe the memories just got rewritten by Stampede. but goddamn. gun for legs...giant mechanical hands...

Vash making a Kirby Ꙩ.Ꙩ face my beloved. just a little guy!! with some badass girls!!! The last line is 「…はい？」 which is like what??/huh??/alright?? etc. はい is a very versatile word ☝ lol

That's it for Chapter #03! As always, the Japanese annotations will be in the reblogs. I'll remember to write the post about Meryl's speech patterns sometime soon.

#getting faster at making these posts 👀#trigunbookclub #trigun annotation #trigun #trigun manga

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tenjikubaby · 2 years

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in this house, we simp for mocchi.

What’s it like having Mocchi as your partner? Gender-neutral HCs.

Mocchi is truer to his name around you: soft and sweet.

➼ Mocchi’s okay with being your personal teddy bear–he loves it when you cling to him. He’s soft and warm; a great cuddle partner, okay? Let’s say the two of you are cuddling, and you fell asleep on him. It would seriously kill him to wake you up. So, like a cat owner whose cat just slept on them, he just stays very still thinking, “Yes. This is fine.”

➼ Mocchi’s super weak to your puppy eyes. Suddenly, the tough-guy image dissolves and he’s willing to give you whatever you want. Watch him struggle as he tries not to fall for it, only to fail. You just have that power over him. Forget Izana, you’re his boss.

➼ There’s this cliché of boyfriends choosing horror movies so their girlfriends would cling to them during the scary parts, right? With Mocchi, it’s... different. Your boyfriend hates horror movies. He’s okay with slashers, but NOT ones with ghosts, demons, curses, and other such things. The idea of an enemy that he can’t just beat up and be done with really scares him. So when you watch such movies, he won’t be cowering but you notice how your boyfriend’s gone completely silent, potato chip bag crumpled in his fist. Help him, he’s stressed.

➼ Mocchi gets really shy about giving compliments. See, he wants to tell you how stunning you look but the words would NOT come out and it’s almost funny how obvious it is that he’s struggling. He doesn’t want to just tell you that you look good, because “good” doesn’t even begin to summarize how amazing you look to him. After some stammering and stuttering, he’ll end up just saying “you look good,” wishing he was more poetic.

➼ Likes to goof off and joke around with you. Tell him all your jokes because I promise you: you will be satisfied by the response. He has this loud, wheezing laugh that’s so infectious, the joke would not even need to be that funny at all. Mocchi’s laugh is guaranteed to increase its funniness.

➼ Are your fingers freezing? No worries, Mocchi has big, warm hands. He’ll take your hands in his to warm them up. You could also cuddle closer to him for warmth and he’ll act like it doesn’t affect him but he is looking away and his ears are turning pink.

➼ Mocchi’s very loud. Sometimes, he’d call you and when you put your phone to your ear, you hear an ear-shattering “Oi, [Name]!! What’s up?” “Hey, Mocchi? Don’t...yell into the phone, please?” He’s so loud to the point that you worry if anyone around you could actually hear him. You have to tell him to tone it down and he will! He just forgets to when he’s excited to tell you something.

➼ Makes sure you know very little about his gang life as possible. If it were all up to him, you’d never know that he and his friends were in gangs. You’d never know he was part of this vicious S-62 generation. He just wants you to keep seeing him as your Mocchi. Ghost movie-hating, human teddy bear Mocchi who struggles with his compliments and gives you piggyback rides when your feet are hurting.

➼ He would teach you self-defense himself. While he tries his best to keep you away from his way of life as much as possible, you never know what’ll happen, right? It’s better to be prepared. So, he teaches you different ways to render a man unconscious (at this point, you’re better at it than Shion). Mocchi often goofs around but when he’s in Teacher mode, he’s completely serious. You best take these lessons seriously.

➼ Would die before telling you, but he was bored one day and started listing down possible names for your future children (or pets, if you don’t want children). When you find it and ask what the names are for, he snatches it and tries to bring up something else. You can clearly see that he’s turning red though.

➼ Once borrowed one of your hair ties, which he kept forgetting to return to you. It was never returned at all. When it’s not in use, he wears it on his arm sometimes--kind of like his lucky charm. He’s never without it. Even in juvie, he kept it with him and never once lost it. Is it a simple black band, a beaded one, a scrunchie? What this hair tie looks like, I leave up to you.

➼ Mocchi likes to pinch your cheeks. He’ll do it first thing when he sees you, or just out of the blue. Sometimes, he’ll do it when you’re angry which either sets you off even more, or you just find it so silly that all of your anger just evaporates. I suggest doing it back to him.

➼ You frequent this one restaurant. It’s not fancy, but he knows the staff and they know you two. You do go to other restaurants, but this one is special. It may not be the best—sometimes the ramen is quite bland, but this is your spot. Many stories, jokes, and sweet words were exchanged here. While he was in juvie, you would still come here from time to time. The staff, who are already his friends, are willing to talk to you if you need it.

#tokyo revengers headcanons #kanji mochizuki x reader #mochi x reader #mocchi x reader #tenjikubaby #i'll change his banner...#mocchi reminds me of a classmate I had #he was pretty loud and kinda mean #but one day a pretty classmate called him handsome and the whole class heard #dude froze and couldn't say anything #his seatmates were laughing and teasing him #they said his ears were turning so red but I wasn't close enough to see #he asked her out a year later

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batmanisagatewaydrug · 9 months

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Ask about Gotham (2014-2019): Was it worth it?

listen man I'm gonna be so real with you right now: I thought it would be really funny to write, like, a huge academic essay responding to this as a joke and then the punchline would be at the end I just say something like "in conclusion the producers of Gotham owe me money and can gargle my balls." and I do have a draft of that right now which, for the record, is 2600 words long and cites Susan Sontag's "Notes on Camp" pretty extensively as well as Glen Weldon's very neat book The Caped Crusade: Batman and the Rise of Nerd Culture. which IS funny, but I'm also not going to get around to finishing it for a while so here's a short answer

it's worth it for the sense of accomplishment, I guess, in the same way that you get to feel satisfied about being done with any grueling and unpleasant thing that's entirely self-inflicted. this is how marathon runners feel, probably, when they're gasping on the ground drenched in sweat with their lungs on fire and legs aching to be cut off.

but in the sense of whether or not Gotham was, like, worth it as a piece of art, I can't say it really was. as a prequel Gotham is grossly bloated and overlong; as a standalone story it's meandering and utterly lacking any original point of view to justify its existence as the 9000th Batman adaptation. things just happen in Gotham and all of it feels hollow because we the audience know how this is going to end; nothing good or bad will actually meaningfully change the status quo of Gotham City as we are seeing it because Gotham City needs to remain in stasis until Batman is old enough to legally buy a beer. it's just exhaustingly nihilistic, nothing matters because nothing is ALLOWED to matter yet and by the end that inherent meaninglessness makes the show an exhausting hollow shell of itself that sucks the life right out of you.

you can't even really call it camp because camp relies so much on sincerity, and by the latter seasons you can TELL the writers have given up and embraced being the silly goof goof weirdo show on purpose and are throwing everything they've got at it. riverdale before it was riverdale. genuinely I think the third episode of season one where the villain of the week is a man killing people by tying them to weather balloons and everyone takes it DEADLY SERIOUSLY is more high camp than anything that happens in the entire fifth season where all of the long-suffering actors are winking cheekily at the camera from beneath their party city wigs.

#gotham time

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gen-is-gone · 2 years

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having some Weird Thoughts currently about tumblr's place in the modern internet ecosystem, vis a vis twitter melting down, macebook/feta losing its shit, and a bunch of folks joining up here either for the first time in years or the first time at all.

namely, I really do believe that automattic/tumblr's current leadership is very very slowly and very very carefully implementing a bunch of changes in preparation to bring back adult content in its entirety, as part of a larger scheme to try to monetize without resorting to data scraping (which is basically impossible to do here the way it is on other sites anyway). it certainly seems like that's what they're doing, between post+, the tip jar, community labels, and the ability to make posts non-rebloggable. obviously these features have plenty of use outside of adult content (except maybe post+, which makes literally no sense outside of sex work), but what they seem to be doing is building up a logistical means by which to allow adult content, and allow it to be monetizable.

and like, no, I don't think tumblr the company is Our Best Friend; yes it is a company that needs to profit under capitalism to survive, but so is everything, and there is genuinely something funny and weird (in a very stupid, ironic way) about tumblr as a social media site operating in the 2020s. It just legitimately doesn't have the capacity to scrape data and sell targeted ads the way the giants of the modern internet do, both because it is a product of an earlier age when that wasn't yet a standard profit mechanism, and also just 'cause like. tumblr's fucking code is shit. I'm sure it's a lot better than it was circa 2012, but jokes about tumblr's legendary goof goof dildo spaghetti code used to be really common, and anyone who's been here longer than a couple months either remembers or at least has heard of just how weird and fucked up and bad the site's basic functionality used to be. Legitimately, the reason why tumblr feels so nice rn compared to the heyday is as much because it's just so genuinely more functional than it was ten years ago as it is because there's so comparatively few people.

but point being: if tumblr under yahoo had been handled with any semblance of basic competence, they might've seen which way the wind was blowing w/r/t targeted ads and data sales and we might have an entirely different, much worse hellsite than we actually have. or it probably would've died because yahoo would've actually fully ran it into the ground, more likely. but also it probably wouldn't have worked because the assumption of anonymity is so much more baked into the incredibly weird, broken, decade and half's worth of layered bullshit code that even if anyone previously could've realized that the smartest way to make money would be to scrape and sell data, they'd never have been able to implement it.

and so we have the tumblr of today: weird, unmarketable, ungovernable, proudly cringe, and deeply resistant to the mainstream. so not actually that much different to tumblr circa 2012, if a lot smaller and more battle-hardened.

but like. by the standards of what's available on the modern internet, tumblr is honestly one of the best, most versatile spaces still standing with any amount of a userbase? straight up, the dominance of twitter and instagram has made a lot of people really oddly perplexed by the concept of being able to write detailed essays in the body of a post, let alone the idea of dozens of images per post, or audio like, at all. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of things about tumblr that I wish were different or better that just aren't compatible with how tumblr is set up at a base level as an LJ user every day I miss threaded comments and LJ-style cuts I LAMENT them I tell you, but of the options out there, tumblr is fucking wild in what it can offer. but I don't just mean for artists and fandom and weird little gremlins like those of us who've been here this whole time, I mean like. fuck. like.

watching the White House's twitter account try to lay out complex policy initiatives in 280-characters is fucking painful sometimes, and yet we've all gotten used to it in the past decade plus. leaving aside the fact that it's bonkers and deeply unsettling and generally bad that world leaders are beholden to usamerican for-profit corporations to communicate in general, of all of the socmed sites out there, it's kind of insane that twitter is the one that got big in the official political scene. (don't get me wrong: twitter is genuinely quite useful for disseminating quick bursts of information in crisis, and it's been fucking brilliant for coordinating in both natural disasters and evolving political/social disruption. but it's terrible at detailed, nuanced information sharing)

I don't know where I'm going with all of this necessarily, and I think twitter eating shit and going down in flames is pretty terrible for global democracy even as it is also on a surface level funny as shit. I don't want tumblr to replace twitter, or facebook, or insta, or tiktok, in being the place where everyone lives online. I want tumblr to stay as the little gremlin art ho fandom clown car, and lbr, it probably will. It'll probably never be what twitter is, for better or for worse. who knows if it'll ever be what it was in 2012 again. I like the ecosystem the way it is these days, with way fewer users, most of whom have been around the block more times than we can count, and are too jaded to start shit anymore. but tumblr needs money to survive, and as much as we're all enjoying posting cringe, tumblr's twitter is pulling off a masterwork balancing act luring twitter users over here, and it's working.

tumblr needs to do what it can to survive. we still don't know if all of this effort staff has been putting in these past ~10 months or so will be enough; the writing has been on the wall for years now that if tumblr doesn't find a way to financially justify itself, it won't survive another sale. automattic took a maybe unprecedented (and extremely positive, imo) risk this past year, and has been trusting current staff to listen to user input and implement positive changes, including finding ways to monetize without invading users' privacy, which who knows if the site even has the capability of doing anyway, even now. if we are all very lucky, and are willing to pitch in and treat this place like our community, we might even collectively succeed, and prove to the wider internet that it is possible to run a popular, high-traffic website without compromising user security. if tumblr is doing what I think they're doing, and very carefully building up a secure, socially, financially, and legally defensible way to support adult content on a site with american servers and a place on the app store in the 2020s, then we're off to the races and who knows where we'll go. if twitter does actually implode beyond salvaging, a huge chunk of the world will feel its loss, and many people, including all the normies and politicians and your mom, could very well cast their gaze to the website people wrote off as in its death throes four years ago. they probably won't, but as I was just vividly reminded earlier today, the White House did, in fact, have a tumblr once upon a time. who knows what the future holds.

but John Green deserves an apology, you weeaboo shits.

#tumblr #twitter #important blue checkmark #tumblr crabs #twitpocalypse #our cyberpunk future #megan whines into the empty abyss of cyberspace

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askfallenroyalty · 1 year

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Here's some more deleted scene panels that never made it in

sorry there's no captions, there's just too many panels to describe and i'm tired. hopefully i'll have the energy/rememebr to do so tomorrow ):

IM REALLY SAD THIS ONE DIDN'T GET IN. I even drew asriel shutting flowey in a box for this joke to work. There was going to be a visual gag of it being a "soap" box. Haha.

Asgore was originally going to tell Asriel to think of something nice to get his mind off of his panic attack.

Which, while funny, took away the feeling of intense panic the audience and asriel should have been feeling at the time. It just didn't fit the pacing/mood. It also showed that -well, i don't know if this is a legitimate grounding technique or if it'd be read as "its ok just think happy thoughts <3 then ur panic attack would end" which... is not.... how that works. Even if it was only to give Asriel a moment of respite, it's shown as effective until Asgore brings up a bad memory. So. bad comic sequence.

more stuff under the cut

I had a really, really hard time balancing the tone of the scene that is currently happening in the redraw. it's why i'm so behind in my drawings, so i'm only now sketching the next couple month's updates.

This chapter has gone through SO MANY changes. I feel that comes with it being the first chapter to completely diverge from the original tumblr version.

Asriel was originally going to have a very on-the-nose nightmare about Flowey feeling excluded from the family and fearing drowning. Now, the whole darkness/water metaphor for suicidal depression will be introduced when that stuff starts to come into play in chapter 4...

i mean, just to really hammer home how much i had to delete for this: i actually did sketch out the original tumblr version here. I had it all ready before chapter 2 began posting. But as I was finishing the color for the warship section I realized, shoot, I don't wanna repeat it.

When I first made the tumblr version, i was getting burnt out and the characters just became so much... meaner? rude? to each other. some bickering or annoyance is fine but I have a bad habit of going overboard. That's something I hope to correct in the rewrite -and focus more on less drama and more wholesome/loving moments.

(note the above scene is shown not in full. its jumping around a bit)

Even tho I was mostly keeping chapter the same the first time I sketched it for the redraw, I added this scene. The idea was that when the house was on fire, Frisk would of ran off to the right of the house to where you can see Old Home.

There, even tho Frisk can't verbally talk, the two have a nice heart-to-heart. Chara remember Frisk has [spoilers] issues. Chara was going to own up to their bad behavior.

Now well, hm. Chara's got a lot of shit going on. Frisk of course has forgiven them (like they do for everyone in the underground -_- oh frisk...) and it's going to be something that's addressed down the road. for now, they've held hands, and shown solidarity for each other. As kids, they're going to goof around and be buddies and not let the cruddy stuff chara did earlier matter. things are so much less of a big deal when you're a kid.

#redraw #deleted scenes

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squeiky · 11 months

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Trying to figure out how espio’s character works is hard.

He works as a detective (to my research its likely the chaotic are a PI group.) and is also a ninja. Ninjas now exist in the sonic cannon, but they are also (at least in our world) a old thing (people aren’t ninjas nowadays) so he’s probably very traditional.

Then we introduce the whole “comedy” aspect to the chaotic group with vector and charmy being the funny guys to espio’s more grounded self.

But like.. am I NOT supposed to think that this guy is essentially the “if your in the clown car you’re gonna be a clown.”

This guy hangs out with a (probably) observation genius-dorkus Mcflorpus and a hyper active actual child with a knife as a butt every day and think “yes I clearly am the most serious grounded guy in all of equestria”

You cannot tell me that this guy isn’t secretly also a goof. I’ve spent my life as the go-to grounded “hey let’s not do that” person with a group of sillywillies and I’ve only been getting sillier. He’s gotta (on a MINIMUM) have inside jokes like there’s gotta be something beacuse no way in hell is this fucker going to top Blaze’s fiery serious business attitude and shadows goal oriented “at any cost” type serious business.

This fucker is “I need money ” and will nope the fuck out whenever it’s over his paycheck. (He ditched Knuckles in Sonic rivals and I am still not over that fact.)

Like no way in hell is he not a secret silly. You see how this dude absolutely fumbled at the sight of Silver t hedgehog?

Also man you guys have got to see the calm as rip tide guy of a dude one he’s flustered like damn he really just runs away (literally!) cannot save his ass to save a life. (Rivals is a blessing )

Absolute fool of a man I will not stop making fun of him.

Oh and I guess yeah something about writing this guy is hard or whatever- totally forgot what I was going to say honestly.

#espio the chameleon #long text post

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shoko-komi · 5 months

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This Special Edition of The Komi Report is split into multiple posts. This is Part Two. Click here for Part One

5. It's Emoyama, Continued

I'm only listing the final chapter, but the whole little arc about Emoyama is basically the 5th pick. It added a new word to my vocabulary – Emoi. I'd say that on its own warrants a place here. But that's far from the only reason.

With Najimi tagging along for the ride, these chapters feel like old times again. Komi's got a problem communicating with a classmate, the three stooges (Komi, Tadano, and Najimi) put their heads together to reach an understanding, and goofs ensue. It's fun, it's funny, it's light, and it's sweet. And it's well set up, with Emoyama's reason for crisis (peeling the unripe fruit of Emoi) having occurred quite a while beforehand.

Add onto that how long Emoyama has been around - she even appears as a teaser in the (current) final scene of the anime...

...along with Lily Sukida. Now that's what I call venerable. Anytime a character like her finally gets some serious attention it's a surprise, a delight, and a treat. Komi's world is full of sleeper agents waiting for their moment. (Just btw, I super ship Sukida and Emoyama now. Maybe I should write a fic....)

Plus...

...it gave us this. Sledgehammer Komi......

I love you, Emoyama. And your mother

Honourable Mentions 407 – Interview 409 - Can't Say Sorry 416 – The Rest 417/418 - Ogiya/Super Awesome 427 – Cool 429/430 - Fuki's Story 433 – A Date with Rumiko

Funniest Joke

Comedy is extremely subjective, so take this category with a grain of salt. But given how much I've had to say about Kawai, I doubt you'll be too surprised:

When tf did she have time to make this??????? It's all of the buildup that makes this so memorable to me; how Kawai is so serious and intimidating until she bonds with komi. Then it's like a switch flips in her head. She's such a dork.

The whole of 393 is one joke – Kawai made a DVD about how they'd benefit from marrying her – so I'm saying the whole chapter gets the funniest joke award and calling it day. There's no better way to explain why this one's a winner than to show you some screenshots, so enjoy:

I love you, Kawai (it bears repeating)

Most Emoi Moment

This award would have gone to the kiss, but there's an underdog who I think has worked harder for it. She's captain of the track team; an aspiring restaurateur; an old friend, a bitter rival, and a true hero; and she's never won a damn thing in her life. She needs this.

She's Makeru Yadano at the year three sports carnival!!! I bet you were surprised this chapter wasn't mentioned among my top picks; not even the honourable mentions!! That's what we in the biz call a fake out. I could never forget my girl Makeru.

Something I noticed while writing this - Yadano probably would have won...

...except that Komi got a head start. You can see that Yadano starts a moment behind (because her teammates are Sarutahiko and Inui, RIP). A relay race is a team effort, so can you really say that Yadano lost? Maybe I'm undermining her personal growth moment. Whoops.

emoi...............................

I would also like to pay my respects to Benujit Spopo, a walk-of-fame KCC gag in my opinion. It appeared this year!

(From Ch. 404 – Tales from the Summer Festival, Part 2)

I love you, Yadano

Reader's Choice

Now is the time. This is the moment. The most coveted and prestigious award of all – the Reader's Choice Award. (It's the most coveted and prestigious because it's determined by democracy 🫡)

For this category, the Komi Report received a record-shattering four votes - that's right!! Four votes!!! From you, the readers.

The votes were extremely varied, and it turned out to be very useful that most people named multiple chapters in their submission. I used a sort of preferential voting system – I tallied everyone's first choice and there was no winner, so I added everyone's second choice, then third etc etc.

Thus we find our victor. With a landside two votes, the 2023 Reader's Choice Award goes to:

*drum roll*

Paam pa du paam!! Chapters 417 & 418 – Ogiya & Super Awesome!!!!

Well deserved!!!!!!!! Ogiya's story is heartbreaking; he was driven to become a literal man baby to escape the terrible price of popularity. Then Komi becomes the most assertive we've ever seen her as she keeps pushing him to accept her friendship. In the end, barriers are broken down!! Emoi!!!

I'm looking at this now... and Komi saying "It's alright. I'm super strong so I'll make sure you're alright" and the look on Ogiya's face.... that's making me tear up...

I love how Tadano and Ogiya are said to have been hanging out at other times before this event. It creates the feeling that these characters have lives when we aren't looking at them – very cool! It also demonstrates that Tadano attracts socially maladjusted people like a magnet. I'd say it's his gentle nature.

My warmest thanks to everyone for their submissions.

Conclusion

Phew... I'm knackered. I've been typing this in a document and the word count has passed 4,000... wowzers!

If you've come this far, I extend to you my sincerest gratitude. I would have prepared and posted this even if I didn't expect anyone to see it, so to have someone read it all the way to the end is very cool. Maybe you even... enjoyed it??????

Here's my resolution for 2024 – I will strive to write every Komi Report as thoughtfully and conscientiously as I wrote this one. The weekly editions will be way shorter, of course. And I won't spend a whole week writing them, but each and every one will have the same love put into it 💪

I hope this 2023 Annual Edition of The Komi Report got you excited about Komi Can't Communicate; whether that excitement is from being reminded of all the good times we've had, or from being annoyed by my opinions. Either way, you're thinking about Komi.

I win.

------------------------

Now that your appetite for Komi Can't Communicate has been whet:

Check out my Komitano AMV on youtube

Or my live action Komi-san compilation video

Thank you very much! Komi returns on January 5th, 2024. I'll see you then!!

#komi #komi can't communicate #komi san wa komyushou desu #komi report #komi shoko #the komi report #shoko komi

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blackswaneuroparedux · 2 years

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Anonymous asked: What role does humor play in your life? How do you look at comedy and its role in culture? Do you think comedy today is more or less funny as woke culture has its itchy trigger finger at the ready to cancel anyone that mocks it? Is it harder for edgy comedians like Dave Chappelle to remain relevant in today’s toxic society?

Your questions are quite wide and so I hope I can hone in on some of the issues you raised.

I don’t think I’m different from anyone in general in not only loving comedy but also having humour in one’s life. I’ve watched my fair share of comedian stand up sets at comedy clubs and shows (Eddie Izzard, Andy Parsons, Ross Noble, Jack Dee, Stewart Lee, Frankie Boyle and so on).

I try to start my day by watching or reading something funny like an online clip or an article, essay or chapter (think Clive James or Anthony Lane or P.G. Wodehouse) - just to set the tone for the rest of the day. Because let’s face it, one look on the home page of any news media from the BBC or the Economist makes for depressing shitty reading.

Put another way, I’m like the girl who gets up one fine morning and wears a brand new white pair of shoes at school. You just know those white shoes are going to get battered around. They’ll get all kinds muddy shoe prints stomped on it and likely chewing gum and dog poo under it. But least you started the day clean. That’s how I feel about humour in my daily life.

I’m fortunate that I have a close circle of friends who make me laugh and that is precious. We text and send each other stuff throughout the working day. It’s light relief for a stressful day at work.

I try not watch comedy on a plane on my lap top. I think the air stewardess in my business class flight always think I need a sedative because I usually get a severe case of the giggles. I try so hard not to laugh out loud out of respect to the sleeping passengers near me. I just can’t help myself. I wet my knickers laughing so hard.

My perspective on and indeed my insatiable need for comedy in my life can best be summed up by that 18th Century man of letters, Horace Walpole who wrote, “The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.”

For me the best comedy is hilarious and humane but equally brutal and true. Like many people I grew in a home where humour was the life blood of our family especially around the dinner table and just generally goofing off. The jokes to point out our foibles or pratfalls acted like glue to bind us together more strongly. As times goes on and as one matures you also learn to lean into humour as a personal coping mechanism when dark clouds gather above. But it’s also a mark of maturity that you also become self aware of humour as a commentary on things that lie just beneath the thin skin of society.

Humour has been on the minds of thinkers for centuries. My eldest sister who is a neurosurgeon and is interested in humour as a side topic of interest gave me a book on the psychology of humour as a birthday gift. As Peter McGraw and Joel Warner explain in their insightful book, The Humor Code: A global search for what makes things funny, “Plato and Aristotle contemplated the meaning of comedy while laying the foundations of Western philosophy… Charles Darwin looked for the seeds of laughter in the joyful cries of tickled chimpanzees. Sigmund Freud sought the underlying motivations behind jokes in the nooks and crannies of our unconscious.” A good read.

We tend to see comedy through the romantic lens of the one-off inspired comic whose unique view of the world is entertaining. But the focus on the individual witty voice misses the gigantic, political nature of the task of comedy. Comedy isn’t just a bit of fun. We don’t laugh at things unless they cause us very serious problems at other points in life. We can see this in the standard category of jokes: about relationships, family, sex, money, impotence, bowel movements, identity etc. We laugh most readily around things that in other ways are very distressing. A good joke invariably has a relationship with darkness, anxiety and pain.

I’ve always valued humour in people as a precious gift. I love having a laugh and even more if it’s at my expense. Perhaps that comes more readily to the British who appreciate the existential absurdity of life and don’t particularly make an effort to climb out of the hole they fell into…and if they do then we bring them down a peg or two.

But Northern Europeans have an even drier sense of humour, yes, including the Germans (it’s there…somewhere) but in the Swiss it’s totally absent. Norwegians have perhaps the driest sense of humour in Europe and that partly stems from the fact of its social code of janteloven - the idea that you mustn’t think of yourself better than anyone else. Because of this I firmly believe humour should be an equal opportunity offender. Moreover what I love about enjoying a good joke is that one the singular properties of certain comedy when done well is the freedom to explore ideas in an unconventional or counterintuitive way, to subvert society’s norms.

No one does that better than a comedian in culture in flux. As the great George Carlin put it, “I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.“

I’ve always been naturally drawn to dark humour from an early age and I suspect that had a lot to do with being packed off to boarding school at a young age (for my peers it was as young as 7) and just learning to develop coping mechanisms in the face of parental abandonment (or it seemed that way).

However I didn’t know the real importance of dark humour until I actually served in the British army and found humour as a form of therapy to deal with stress and situations of life and death with my army brothers and sisters. Our shared jokes were so off colour and un-PC that we would dare not repeat them in polite and respectable company. But that kind of shared humour served a crucial importance as any soldier will tell you. By mocking dangerous things or the situations you might find yourself with others, humour can embolden us. It helpfully paints what is potentially very frightening as deeply ridiculous. Joseph Heller’s ‘Catch-22’ captures the spirit of the absurdity of it all.

The comic perspective fills a central need of every society; it enables us to cope much better with our own follies and disappointments, our troubles around work and love and our difficulties enduring ourselves. Comedy is waiting to be reframed as a central tool behind the creation of a better world.

Comedy offers us a way of having a better time around things which, otherwise, can feel pretty disastrous. Ideally, in the utopia, comedy and its therapeutic potential wouldn’t be left to chance. Humour would be deliberately cultivated as a benign response to a range of entrenched difficulties. Previously, certain countries had an elaborate carnival season devoted to enforced comic activities. For a brief time, the weak could boss around the powerful, priests and nuns were supposed to hold obscene rituals in their churches, serious people were required to get drunk and throw bags of flour over each other’s heads. Humour wasn’t just left to those who felt so inclined: it was a kind of duty.

Black humour was a means of reducing anxiety of the awareness of death. Historians now know that one of the things that helped the persecuted Jewish community survive the demented Nazi persecution creeping into full blown genocide was humour, often of the darkest kind.

An example well-known joke went like this in Warsaw: "Moishe, why are you using soap with so much fragrance?" - "When they turn me into soap, at least I will smell good”. Jokes about soap were in response to rumours which started circulating in 1942 about soap produced from the fat of the Jews. Other jokes of this kind: "See you again on the same shelf!" or "Don't eat much: the Germans will have less soap!"

Indeed Jewish humour did not die in the Holocaust. In fact, Jews depended on humour to endure the period after liberation, both as a psychological weapon to grapple with what they had endured under Nazi persecution and as a source of coping with the displacement of the postwar period. After the war, humour was a poignant affirmation of mir zaynen do - we are (still) here - a declaration that the Jewish people had not disappeared and indeed could at times have the last laugh.

Does comedy have something to teach us or can we use comedy to teach? That is an interesting question in itself.

When I discuss this with friends across the political and non-political spectrum, some have argued comedy can’t be didactic as its the ultimate contradiction in terms. It’s why they hate woke comedy that often pervades the BBC these days and even the comedy clubs. These friends and I would sometimes go to the Edinburgh Festival to see comedians live on stage. But they say none of what passes for comedy on stage is funny because of the politics of woke.

I would disagree. Not about woke comedy - which ranges from pedestrian to just awful. But I will say that some of the best comedy is didactic. That’s because the best comedy is about revealing hilarious truths.

The ancient biblical books of Jonah and Esther, for example, have comedic elements that are clearly didactic. William Shakespeare’s ‘Much Ado about Nothing’ is didactic. The Marx Brothers’ ‘Duck Soup’ and ‘A Night at the Opera’ are didactic. Mel Brook’s ‘The Producers’ (original only) and ‘Blazing Saddles’ are didactic.

For us Brits, Monty Python is didactic, especially in its masterpiece, ‘Life of Brian.’ For Americans, ‘Seinfeld’ is didactic precisely because it’s about nothing. From ‘The Great Dictator’ to ‘Dr. Strangelove’ and ‘Blackadder series’ to ’South Park’, you will find that great comedy can be didactic.

The problem my friends identified is not that woke comedy is didactic, but rather that the woke side of the moon has no light of knowledge to impart. Woke ‘comedy’ tries to be didactic and fails because it has nothing profound or interesting to teach.

Comedy is not merely an event that produces laughter. A fart is not comedy (although it could be). The difference between comedy and tragedy is tonal. Both stem from the inflexibility of the ego.

This is why for example Shakespeare’s ‘Much Ado About Nothing’ is such a remarkable comedy. The two people who want to be viewed as most principled in their objection to romance are so easily pushed over into love, because their hearts are ultimately farcical. The hilarity stems from the disconnect between their inner and outer selves.

While the ridiculous disconnect between the ego and reality makes us laugh here, it could just as easily make us weep if the situation were changed. The fundamental difference between Shakespeare’s comedies and his tragedies is the ending. Everyone gets married at the end of his comedies and everyone dies at the end of his tragedies. Yet Hamlet and Macbeth are still felled by their own inflexible egos, just as Benedict and Beatrice are made to be wonderful, humorous fools for love by the same principle of human nature.

Comedy’s didactic nature is even clearer when we look to films like ‘Duck Soup’ or ‘Blazing Saddles.’ ‘Duck Soup’ is a scathing indictment of goose stepping fascism (of the real kind and not the lazy insults lobbed over these days) and arguably the Marx Brothers’ funniest film. ‘Blazing Saddles’ does the same for American racism. Neither is necessarily meant to be interpreted along propositional or pedagogic lines. Regardless, those films teach and they teach well. They expose the absurdities of reliance upon authoritarian government and identity politics to solve our problems.

The problem with woke comedy is that woke comics want to convince people to do the right thing, to hold the right view, in other words to moralise if we want to be considered good people - which we all do. But the politics behind woke politics is fundamentally ridiculous. That’s why it can be so easily used for comedy: their core concepts and assumptions (gender and biology in trans ideology or the darker you are on the colour spectrum, the greater your societal victimhood) are easy to mock.

In ‘Life of Brian,’ the Pythons did not mock Jesus. They mocked institutionalised religion. When Jesus appears, it’s in the background, he only speaks scripture, and his portrayal is markedly respectful. Nothing else in the film is respectful - everything else is treated like a huge hilarity. John Cleese said the reason they didn’t try to make Jesus funny is that they didn’t think he would have been funny.

According to John Cleese, Jesus didn’t have an ego to bruise or be inflexible. Yet Jesus was a complete and humble person. If he slipped on a banana peel and fell, he would have found it just as funny as anyone else. That’s because Jesus was self-forgetful. You can’t mock someone who gets the joke. So you can’t turn Jesus into a joke, because he’s not threatened by jokes.

One of the most enduring theories of humour arrived courtesy of the philosopher Thomas Hobbes. It asserts that humour is ostensibly about mocking the weak and exerting superiority. While this is clearly the function of some comedy – anyone who has flinched at a comic’s lame attempt to poke fun at, for example, disability will attest to this – it’s a relentlessly bleak and far from complete explanation of the purpose of humour. It’s better for a comedian to punch up then down.

So the real question today’s politically charged climate especially in the so-called culture wars (more visible in the Anglo-American world rather than in the rest of the world) is who is doing the punching up and who is punching down?

It depends as each side of the political divide claims the lower ground ie they are the weaker and therefore don’t deserve to be punched down upon but they can freely punch up.

Dave Chappelle’s comedy is the absurdity behind the so-called victim olympics that pervades behind woke culture. So making jokes about people of colour by white people is punching down but, as Chappelle alludes, people of colour can’t make jokes about white men in skirts ie trans because that’s now a greater sin and it would be punching down. In accepting the Mark Twain Prize for American Humour in 2019, Chappelle said a good joke is a finely crafted joke and one designed to offend regardless of one’s feelings or of one’s politics. Victimhood in terms of giving personal or political offence has no place in comedy.

I believe a joke is a joke. It doesn’t matter where it comes from so long as it’s funny. If you laugh, you own it.

I personally think much of our popular culture is overwhelmingly left - from Hollywood to the BBC - I don’t think that should be a controversial statement. It’s nearly always been that way as it attracts a certain kind of creative content maker whose values are liberal in the classical sense. There’s nothing wrong in that because this liberalism of the past didn’t necessarily inject itself into the art except in very benign ways but mainly it just told a damn good story or made us laugh because they told genuine funny jokes (from Python to Blackadder and Frasier to the Simpsons).

I think that’s changed now as woke ideology is increasingly the raison d’etat of a new generation of creative content makers. The message is more important than the craft itself.

Anyway, I digress.

Punching down is a charge of course that has been levelled at Dave Chappelle for his many jokes about different groups who have invested a great deal in their identity and also exert their own social and political power. But does he really do that? I don’t think so.

The mainstream media critics publicly hated his comedy special, but the ordinary audience overwhelmingly loved it (if rotten tomatoes metric score of 96% approval is anything to go by). It’s clear that many in the mainstream media had not really watched the show or gave an accurate account. Indeed the mainstream cultural critics in the US and in the UK prevented its readers from knowing that a debate was even happening, let alone what it is really about. If the argument about gender theory is mentioned at all, it is dismissed as a bunch of “anti-trans” bigots - aka ‘TERFs’ - hurting a beleaguered and tiny minority, for some inconceivable, but surely awful, reason.

As one of my favourite conservative writers (and gay rights advocate) and as an authority on the conservative philosopher, Michael Oakeshott, Andrew Sullivan put it really well, as he always does:

“Chappelle’s final Netflix special, ‘The Closer,‘ is a classic. Far from being outdated, it’s slightly ahead of its time, as the pushback against wokeness gains traction. It is extremely funny, a bit meta, monumentally mischievous, and I sat with another homo through the whole thing, stoned, laughing our asses off - especially when he made fun of us. The way the elite media portrays us, you’d think every member of the BLT community is so fragile we cannot laugh at ourselves. It doesn’t occur to them that, for many of us, Chappelle is a breath of honest air, doing what every comic should do: take aim at every suffocating piety of the powers that be - including the increasingly weird 2SLGBTQQIA+ mafia - and detonating them all.

‘The Closer‘ is, in fact, a humanely brilliant indictment of elite culture at this moment in time: a brutal exposure of its identitarian monomania, its denial of reality, and its ruthless tactics of personal and public destruction. It marks a real moment: a punching up against the powerful, especially those who pretend they aren’t. Bigoted? Please. Anyone who can watch this special and think Chappelle is homophobic or transphobic is either stupendously dumb or a touchy fanatic. He is no more transphobic than J.K. Rowling, i.e. not at all, and the full set masterfully proves it to anyone with eyes and ears.“

I would argue it’s hugely reassuring to see the ‘powerful’ laughing at themselves - in this case the LGBTQ+ community’s more shrill and self-righteous social justice warrior activists that brook no public criticism of their conduct against women and other critics who don’t have the power to fight back and are instead cancelled. It is a trusim to say that finding oneself comical is a token of maturity. It means being able to see one’s faults, without being too defensive about them. This, I argue, was one of the messages of Chappelle’s comedy show.

The thing that intimidates us isn’t actually power. It’s power that looks like it’s going to be inhumane: insensitive, unkind power. So we’re intently interested in things that reveal a mature, kindly sort of power.

Humour often provides a mechanism whereby the powerless (or at least the less powerful) can give constructive but pointed feedback to the powerful. Whether the powerful - in Chappelle’s view that would be the trans and social just warrior crowd - can take social commentary masked as a joke says a lot about their level of maturity.

Humour, as one neurosurgeon sister put it, is a form of psychological processing, a coping mechanism that helps people to deal with complex and contradictory messages, a response to conflict and confusion in our brain. Humour that is in bad taste or cruelly targeted at particular groups may generate conflict, but humour is also our way of working through difficult subjects or feelings. In this sense the comedian’s role is not validate our feelings but to make us think.

In olden days, the idea of the court jester - an officially licensed and salaried comic - was built on the importance of humour to the mental health of the powerful. Even if in the council room or around the dinner high table, the leading people didn’t feel much like joking, the jester was required to make barbed, witty and perhaps mocking remarks to deflate pomposity and restore sane perspective. The high table may not be occupied by the feudal elites anymore but by a more egalitarian society now.

Who can disagree with the fact that all of us - leftist, conservative, revolutionary, traditonalist, straight, gay, lesbian, bi, trans, different colours and many creeds - are not in need of our inflexible egos and the self-important pompous bubbles we inhabit from being burst open from time to time?

If we live in a world where everyone demands equality, in other words to sit at the same high table, then we also sign up to be equally ‘offended’ by the court jester, however fair or unfair it may feel.

The shrill of cancelling a comedian is not the answer if we find a joke offensive. We have the right to protest. We can protest by...not laughing. It really is that simple.

Thanks for your question.

#ask #question #humour #comedy #go woke go broke #woke comedy #woke #dave chappelle #british humour #society #jewish humour #culture #jokes #funny #humour is the best medicine #personal

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paranoidpoltergeist · 2 years

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Reviewing all the TMNT movies

I've had a ton of free time and decided it'd be fun to watch and review a bunch of stuff. So I did, except I underestimated the amount of content and now I have to break it down into categories. Why I thought I could watch 8 movies, 5 series, and 3 crossovers in a week I don't know but here we are. Please keep in mind this is my opinion so you might not agree! This is listed in order of when I watched them NOT ranking I'm gonna do that later after I finish the tv shows.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles(1990)

MMM a classic I remember first getting this DVD, my mom let me get it out of the $10 bin at the beach because I had lost a tooth. I didn’t remember much about the plot at all so it was like watching a new movie and man did I enjoy it. This was a great movie and one that held up pretty well. I liked the characters, the villain, the plot, and ofc the iconic farmhouse scene we get with just about every series. I even liked the character design surprisingly enough.

Some scenes felt weird, a couple of jokes felt off, and Splinter was literally the most terrifying thing I’ve ever seen. He looks like a drowned chihuahua. The swearing was written as though the writer's mom never let them curse and they were pretending to be 25 in the youtube comment section or something, but It was great and honestly a pleasant surprise in the wake of all my childhood favorites being ruined by just how bad they were and the end credits song? Iconic. 8/10 will be watching again. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ll: The Secret of the Ooze(1991)

This movie is… good. It’s not a bad movie but it’s more goofs and gags-focused. It got a couple of laughs out of me but it felt somehow too long and also rushed. I’m pretty sure I got Leo and Donnie mixed up 207 times, I could almost never tell who was talking despite having the subtitles on, the villains were the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen, and I’m still not 100% sure who the science guy is exactly and whether he’s good or bad. In conclusion, I’m now eating a pizza. 6/10 might watch again

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles lll(1993)

Well, this is certainly a movie. I don’t even really know what to say, I couldn’t root for Kenshin or even Mitsu and well the turtles are really really ugly. It was funny but I’m not sure if it was a “so bad it's funny” or actually funny. No one was very well fleshed out, the villain was Idk tbh, I don’t feel particularly satisfied, and the “we wanna stay here” thing at the end and then them all suddenly going “no we’ll go home ig” was kinda weird and probably only got put in for screen time. 4/10 I don’t believe I’ll be watching this again. I will, however, be crying bc I am in fact lactose intolerant and that pizza was not worth it. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles(2014)

Man, I remember going to watch this movie in theaters like it was yesterday. Ignore my nostalgia rant but my dad sucks and never did anything with me so these were the only movies he ever went and watched in theaters, no matter how bad it was that made them infinitely better. I used to watch this movie like every night when I went to sleep so hearing this stupid music was so nostalgic, I adored this movie as a kid and I was almost scared to rewatch it without my rose-tinted glasses.

I have super mixed feelings about this movie, my expectations were so low it actually surprised me. The villains were honestly bad, not much screen time, the foot soldiers just straight up looked bad, I don’t know a lot about Sacks but somehow less about Shredder, Karai looks like she’s going through her 2010 emo phase, Splinter looks like what I can only imagine my cat would if I gave in to the urge to only shave the top of his head and arms, the turtles themselves are ugly, and their backstories mediocre. I could keep going but I did like the way the turtles interacted with each other. It had its funny moments, the soundtrack was good, and I actually quite liked Donnie. In conclusion 6/10 it wasn’t the best but it’s enjoyable and I’d watch it again. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows(2016)

Right, so I hate this movie. I can’t explain it, I've always disliked this movie. I tried super hard to watch it and literally fell asleep. It’s boring, I’m not a huge fan of how they interacted, Bebop and Rocksteady were mid although mildly enjoyable, shredder was once again a blank page, and Kraang just lowkey annoyed me. He was super gross and looked like that one transformer but pink and slimy.

The turtles little “I wanna be human” thing was mediocre and I felt like they just added it on for screentime. Casey was super unmemorable, Baxter was also kinda boring, Karai might as well have not been in the movie at all, and a lot of the jokes fell flat for me. On a more positive note, I liked the trash truck. What sucks is I really wanna like this movie bc we get a lot of characters from the original but it's so boring. 2/10 am going to burn the disk. TMNT(2007)

I was not looking forward to this movie, but surprisingly enough I liked it. I’m sad Mikey and Donnie got barely any screen time but Raph was cool. I liked Karai even though we didn’t see much of her, and the ending left me feeling pretty satisfied. The turtles were once again ugly, Splinter looked like that one macaroni noodle I lost under the fridge, and the villain was just ok. I am however a pretty big fan of the minor character development we get to see.

I’ve watched this movie probably like 4 times now, although it’s been a very long time, and the first time I watched this movie I loved it, the second it was ok, and the 3rd I kinda hated it. I basically got to come back with a fresh start and it was good, I noticed little plot points I didn’t before, debated whether I hated this Splinter or not 27 times, and realized Chris Evans voices Casey. This is a good movie. It’s cute, at times funny, and just genuinely a good watch for kids. 6.5/10 Batman vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles(2019)

You know I quite liked this movie. I liked the art style and all the turtles a lot?! Unlike the 2007 movie, I didn’t feel like a single character had a ton more screen time than the others and Leo had good character development! I’m also a dc fan so seeing Damian acting a bit more like a kid was great.

It’s a fun movie and they found a pretty good balance between funny and serious. I’m not 100% why Ra’s wanted to mutate all of Gotham tbh so that was kinda weird and there were some weird tone shifts with the random graphic murder. At one point Leo yelled at Raph because he could have killed these people and then I watched Donnie kill a man with a manhole cover, but Splinter finally wasn’t the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen although he also wasn’t in this movie. Overall I’d give this a 7/10. It wasn’t the best thing I’ve ever seen but it was good, I’m also craving pizza again but I’m still recovering from last time so I think I’d rather eat moldy bread. I'll be adding the rise movie after it's out but I kept getting scared I was gonna accidentally delete all this lol

#teenage mutant ninja turtles #movie review #the sleepless nights spent on this are actually astronimocal #Most of this was written at 3am so please leave my weird grammar alone #bayverse tmnt #tmnt 2007 #batman vs teenage mutant ninja turtles #actually why do we keep letting Micheal Bay make movies #I swear the script he gives Megan Fox just says *breathes heavily*#boutta tag this like it's ao3 lmao

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lord-tekron · 1 year

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Oops, I am once more in a “Behind the Scenes” mood, let’s see what there is to talk about... Well we talked about Dave Miller last timed, so let’s talk about the dark side of that coin.

For some clarity sake, I am assuming you have already read the post where I went on a tangent talking about Dave Miller. If not then take a quick glare at it as while I may repeat some stuff I don’t know what I will repeat, so make sure to check there. https://lord-tekron.tumblr.com/post/711905032118943744/got-your-attention-good-now-its-time-for-some

Now let’s talk about the funny rabbit man.

When Dave was finalized, there was this debate on when/if Springtrap would appear and how. After all it sorta showed that Dave finally wrangled control so how would I even get him to appear? Well that is when the Mob Boss Freddy arc began. In Chapter 10 there is a small little detail that shows Elizabeth and Dave walking past the building Freddy and his Goons were ransacking, and if you notice REAL close, you can see remnant falling from the sky.

Now, where does this land? Well it lands right on the Springtrap arm. This led to the bit with Michael and the now reawoken arm doing some hijinks for the rest of that chapter.

(This is fanart from Ooftroop btw, and it is a joke that works on multiple levels because it’s a recreation that was show to them out of context AND they stopped reading TSP at chapter 9, the chapter BEFORE this scene happens in. Only reason I am sharing this is because when else am I gonna show this in any natural context?)

But yeah, soon Armtrap hooks himself up to the one mafia robot and takes control of it, and then a new problem occurs. What is his personality like? I mean he is evil, obviously, but what kind of evil is he? If William Afton is the mad genius, and Dave Miller is the guilty aspect, what should Springtrap be?

And thankfully the Silver Eyes trilogy gave me an idea, in The Fourth Closest there is a bit where Springtrap (or well, a Springtrap illusion thing, fuck fnaf lore sometimes man) where he is singing and dancing as he mocks Jessica.

That, is beautiful. Springtrap is a killer, but he is also fucking EXTRA with it. He ain’t just gonna kill you, he is going to put on a show for no one but himself for the hell of it. And as such the pieces sorta fell together, as he is the only character that gets musical numbers in the damn comic (even in Nightmare Countdown where there are other “singers” he gets the most dynamic one as the judge/worm), much to peoples confusion.

I scare people very easily. But another thing I wanted Springtrap to be is, for lack of a better word, wrong. Like even for all the Mushroom Mutants, Soul Dozer, and Shadow Kings, something about him is different. And the most obvious example is for him to be the only one that has the sense of awareness of the 4th wall, like others may look at the “camera” in disbelief, but he takes it a step beyond and has jabs at it. Not to mention him being unique with having colored text unlike everyone else usually does.

Another thing is that, while he may be the big bad of the trio (Him, Freddy, and Baby), he had to be used correctly. He may be fun to write, but too much of a good thing can make a person sick of it. So after the first music number, he mostly takes a working in the shadows role as the story focuses on Freddy and Baby, with him only coming up here and there for a goof or gag to remind the audience that he is still there.

And then, with Baby was defeated, it was time for him to take control, and one thing I feel bad about is that I think I was a bit too vague about how he did somethings. Frankly I don’t think that there are even any good way to describe it even right now, but to put it bluntly. Springtrap had Freddy send a message to Baby, who was asked to put an emergency thing of remnant on the side incase she fails. This side remnant would then be used to temporarily give Springtrap enough juice to wiggle as a bit of Freddy’s endo wires.

And he would inch his way to someplace they wouldn’t suspect, and temporarily hijacked Lefty’s head.

And then, as we saw in Grand Return, he was able to get himself a new body.

Now, I won’t lie... Another poor writing aspect on my end, relied on ALOT of coincidences for that to work. But I will say, it did lead to the best character ever, Paradox Springtrap.

This fucker is FUN, he is evil, he is wacky, and he is overly dramatic. Everything during the Springtrap arc was a joy. There is a reason I end up constantly redrawing him, he is just a fun character to have do stuff for. Fuck I wrote a throwaway line saying he “installed the laser vision feature” cause it was funny, and then said “wait, LETS ACTUALLY HAVE HIM SHOOT LASERS OUT OF HIS EYES CAUSE THIS IS DUMB AND HILARIOUS AND AMAZING”

AND EVEN THEN HIS BULLSHIT DID NOT STOP, BECAUSE AS IT TURNS OUT HE HAD A SECRET FINAL FORM WITH THE REMNANT MONSTER HE TURNS INTO AT THE END!

And as a little treat, Remnant Springtrap has an entire thing I did that saves me the work of writing everything and gives you some more stuff to look at.

I don’t know if there is a proper term to call this type of remnant, my brain just defaults to calling it “Dark Remnant” but that is kinda dumb, meanwhile far as I can tell only kind of Remnant besides regular Remnant is “Shadow Remnant” but that is from Fnaf AR and no one cares about Fnaf AR. :V

Another thing I liked was how he was defeated, not only by having Dave throw Springtrap for a loop and do something he thought he wasn’t going to do, but also how he suffers something worse than death, I mean he’s died like what? 2-3 times already, give or take? And since one of the main gimmicks of The Springlock Paradox was the dimensional device, it only made sense that it would be the thing that sealed his fate by trapping him in a place that doesn’t exist.

And we’ll never have to worry about him ever again!

None whatsoever

Gone like yesterday

But hey, plenty of elbow room in the void!

I am certain he’ll be completely rational and sane in a place with no beginning and no end, where even time is but a suggestion, right?

Yeah... I think I am right.

#The Springlock Paradox #Springtrap #Dave Miller #Fnaf #Behind the scenes #fnaf au #fnaf comic #au #comic #au comic #fnaf au comic #remnant #five nights at freddy's #springlock #paradox

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