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billthedrake · 1 year

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TRAINING THE SALES GUY (PART TWO)

Note: this series will have some edgier content.

I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I'd had sex with my coworker. And not just any coworker. Carson Fucking Wells. Straight bro who apparently had a thing for sucking dick. My dick included. He wasn't my direct report, at least, but still...

I spent the next week after our sales visit, I was waiting for a visit from HR. In my more dramatic, worried mind, I imagined being told to leave immediately and they'd send me my personal stuff later.

But pretty quickly, I realized Wells wasn't gonna blab. He didn't want word getting out about this either. He had even more reason to keep it private, and once the fear and fog cleared from my brain, I realized he was keeping more distance from me at the office. No more stopping into my office to shoot the breeze, no more "Boss" nickname. I was Bill again.

I was glad, really. I'd had a hot, very hot no-strings experience with a kind of hetero dude and was able to relive those memories now. I even thought about Carson during my next hookup BJ. 30 year old jocky gay guy from Grindr. Not a dead ringer or anything, but I closed my eyes while the Grindr cocksucker deep throated me and let myself be transported back to that Denver Marriott. I even grabbed Grindr guy's head like I did Carson's and start thrusting.

"You should give a guy some warning," he said when he finally came up from air, admiringly stroking my dong. "You got a big fucking dick."

"Sorry man," I apologized, stroking his dark brown hair. I kind of wished his hair coloring matched Carson's more, which was kind of fucked up. This guy was way cure and way hot. "You got a great mouth."

The flattery worked for him. "OK if I just milk that load out of you?" he asked.

I knew he'd do a good job, so I nodded. "More than OK. Have at it..."

I was out of the Carson Wells headspace, and I began to enjoy this blowjob for what it was. Some guys on Grindr overpromise their oral skills. This guy wasn't one of the bullshitters. He knew how to go gradual to work up a big of steam, then really go wild and deep on my dong to make me blast. It was awesome.

In our DMs we'd established a no-recip vibe, and indeed I didn't offer to get him off. But I did thank him and praise his ability. It was may be a one off but we both said we'd hit each other up sometime.

***

A man can go through phases. In my 20s I tried it all. Well, not every perverted kinky thing under the sun, but when it came to regular vanilla sex, I sucked, got sucked, fucked, got fucked. I tried rimming and frot, though those didn't appeal to me as much. By my 30s, I realized I was much more into topping than bottoming. It was half physical, since bottoming didn't feel fun or pleasurable to me like it did to a lot of guys. But it was that feel of being in control, of doing the penetrating, that got me going. And with the coming of online hookup sites and eventually the apps, I found identifying as a top attracted total bottoms. I thought I'd miss the vers side. Turns out, I didn't.

My 40s were about being in a relationship. Not a six month thing, or a two year thing, but marriage. I was still processing what had gone wrong with me and Rob. Maybe we fucked up a good thing, or maybe we never should have been together so long. The sex was great, but not perfect. But we'd drifted apart in emotional ways, which was tough.

Maybe that's why I was getting into the no-strings thing so much. Not being a man whore or anything, but once or twice a month, I found a guy to service me. And truth, be told the temptation was getting stronger. Grindr and Scruff had some dedicated cocksuckers, and I had the kind of dick those guys often went for.

Maybe that's why I was scrolling through the apps for the second time in a week. Work had been getting me stressed, and maybe seeing Carson had my mind wandering all afternoon. Hell, there were a number of the other younger bros I wouldn't mind sucking my dick either...

"NO GAG REFLEX" came the boast of one. I took this guy's profile with a grain of salt. Like I said, there were a lot of bullshitters on Grindr. But if he was offering...

"Hi man," I messaged. "Fucking hot profile." I was massaging the cock in my sweats. Maybe a quiet evening in wasn't gonna be so quiet.

Up till that point I'd met two men I could really let loose with orally. Rob gave pretty head, but he wasn't one of the. One was a trick who deep throated me greedily, kind of choking/gagging on my cock, but in a hungry pig kind of way. It was before all the porn videos of that kind of thing ant it seemed crazy and nasty and hot. The other was a guy I went out with for a few month, Steve. He was really into servicing me, and was very open to having his face fucked. So we did that, a lot. He wouldn't do anal, and I think I ended up calling things off with him for that reason.

Like I say, men go through phases. Now I thought of Steve as the one who got away.

I told No-gag-reflex guy about that now. About my ex-boyfriend who used to do that and how I missed it.

He boasted how he could really hand some rough throat treatment. "I'll make you forget that ex," came the reply.

Maybe he thought I was referring to someone more recent and that I was still carrying a torch. It was a hot thing to say though.

"Hell yes," I typed back.

"My place or yours?" he asked.

"Either works," I wrote. I looked down at my sweatpants and beat up T-shirt. I didn't feel like going out. "But how bout mine?" I sent him my address.

"Cool," he said. "Can be there in twenty." Then "You might wanna have a towel handy. I've not had any accidents in years, but you're a big boy."

He was probably laying it on thick. I mean, I'm hung big but not like fucking Rocco Steele or anything. Still, I got an old towel and set it out for the ready.

Turns out No Gag didn't need the towel. The dude was a pro. I'll admit he wasn't my normal type physically, but I was glad I'd gone beyond my normal type. He had a fun, horny energy as he walked in and practically begged for me to whip it out.

I did.

"Fuuuuckk..." he hissed as he reached down to slowly stroke up the length. "I'm gonna love have this fucker buried down my throat." No Gag had a way of making me feel like a porn king, and I was loving. He looked up with a flirty. "Where ya wanna do this?" he asked.

I tilted my head to direct him into the living room, where two towels were set out. One folded for his knees, the other... well...

He knelt down as I peeled down my sweats. And then he was on me. Nice, hungry sword-swallowing act. He was skilled all right, but part of me was still a little nervous going wild, since I didn't really know the guy and never had done anything before him. I did have one bad Grindr experience with a dude who swore he could deep throat me. He most decidedly could not.

"I'm going in, man," I announced. "Just tap my leg if it gets to be too much."

He mumbled around my cock in a way that communicated he didn't plan on tapping anything. So I held on to his skull and started riding. I didn't go hard at first but I gave myself some deep, slow, and steady throat action. Working in deeper... deeper... till my my nuts pressed against his chin.

"Holy fuck," I gasped. This felt awesome, amazing in a way I'd forgotten a tight throat could feel. No Gag really didn't seem to have any reflex kicking in. "Hold another second?" I asked, my cock buried deep. He didn't answer, but he didn't tap out. He just held himself calm and still and nursed my dick with his throat. I honestly I think I pulled out just so I wouldn't cum.

No Gag let out a sound that was a combo of groan and deep intake of air. "Ugh... fuck that's hot," he said.

I held my dick up, rigid and very wet. "Think we can go for some of the stuff we talked about?" I asked. In our chat, No Gag had messaged some specific things his oral tops often enjoyed doing.

"Go for it," he growled.

I nodded, then pushed back in. I gave him a second with my cock buried full in him, then I held his skull and just fucking. Not slow this time, I just pumped his mouth and throat like a fleshjack, getting off on the clutching wetness on my thrusting cock and the slick suction noises. I slowed down just a little and compensated for harder thrusts.

Turns out he did have a gag reflex after all. Nothing bad happened, but the sucker gagged around my cock a half second, then swallowed around me while I stopped. I pulled out and saw the thicker mucus on my dong. I was turned on as fuck.

"Slower?" I asked.

He had a determined look. "At first. Then you can go hard again."

I slid my hardon back between his spit wet lips and now felt the drool wet my ball sac with each inward thrust. I tried to maintain something between the fast and the hard rhythms as I pumped his face and looked down in disbelief at the man's feat in taking me. And wouldn't you know? I thought of Carson Wells and that fucking did it. My hips gave a hard jab and caused more gagging sounds. I was already cumming though, and thankfully, the sucker knew how to take me, and let me ride out my O. I relaxed and let go of my grip on his head.

Tears were streaming down his cheek when he finally pulled off, but he looked happy as a clam. "You were horny," he observed.

I looked down and patted him playfully on the cheek as way of thanks. "You made me horny... goddamn, that was incredible."

He stood up, spit on the top part of his sweatshirt, but otherwise not looking worse for the wear. I had an extra towel and handed it to him to wipe off.

"You do that a lot," he observed as he set the towel down.

I shook my head. "I haven't in years. Thanks for reminding me how much I love it."

No gag grinned. "Pleasure was mine, man. Some guys... well, they can go too hard or too easy. You were just right. "

"Any chance we could do this again?" I asked.

I was expecting a noncommittal Grindr sure-maybe response but No Gag shook his head. "Nah, man. My husband gives me a hall pass, but not for repeats?"

"Well thanks for using your hall pass on me," I replied. "Seriously, I'm gonna think about that for a while."

***

At first I thought Carson Wells had major misgivings about sucking my dick. It turns out he just didn't want anyone suspecting.

"Hey Boss," he said as we rode the elevator down one Friday afternoon. If you're familiar with the financial district in summer, you know it clears out each Friday midday. Carson and I were the dumb saps working the full day.

I was caught off guard by the return of the nickname, but welcomed that Carson and I were on friendly terms again. "Hey Wells, I thought you'd be hitting the links by now."

He shot me his goofy frat-boy smile that worked a little too well on me. "I wish, man. I have a big camping trip with my buddies in a couple weeks, and can't really the half day now."

"Well, I guess it's good to put in some face time," I replied. "With Cal in and all." Calvin was the Senior VP and divided his time between the major locations of our firm.

Carson smirked, like he was pleased to hear me be cynical about corporate politics. "I like this side of you, Boss," he said.

The elevator dinged at the ground floor. At least I could make a getaway. But Carson leaned in before the doors opened. "You've gotten head lately, haven't you?"

I blushed, which made the dude laugh. The doors open and we strutted our way through the lobby and out on to the street.

Carson pulled out his phone to get an Uber. I was going to do the same but he looked up and shot me an impish look. "You think maybe you can get my weekend started off right?" he asked.

I knew what he was asking. God, he was hot in his business casual. Golf shirt polo that stretched over his gym-built muscle, lightweight wool slacks, and tan dress shoes. He knew he looked hot, too, the perfect bait for a gay dude like me.

"Come on, Bill," he urged, his voice a little softed. "No fucking strings.. it'll be fun."

"Yeah," I agreed. Blushing as I did but feeling a surged of horniness that was already making me chub up in my own trousers.

It was weird as hell going to Carson's condo. Smallish one bedroom, but clean and neat. Very much had that city-dude bachelor pad feel. Just the right amount of sports memorabilia, but decorated like he'd hired somebody for the job. He set down his keys and wallet and phone on the kitchen island and turned to me, his playfulness and easy confidence giving way to some more urgent horniness. I could read it in his face and in those amazing green eyes.

"OK if we take our time, Boss?" he asked. He was actually a little nervous, which was the thing that put me at ease. And turned me on. "Last time we were a little rushed."

"We were drunk," I reminded him.

"Well, we're not drunk now," Carson reminded. "I wanna enjoy this."

I felt my dick really firming up into a hard ridge. I couldn't believe Wells was gonna give me head again. I'd been thinking about the possibility a lot, but the reality of it was really sinking in. "What are you thinking, Wells?" I asked.

He shrugged.

"It's a real taboo to suck another man's dick, isn't it?" I prompted, throwing back something he'd admitted to me in Denver.

He blushed. "Yeah, it is. Big time. No one knows I'm into this shit."

"I do, Carson." I didn't mean to make him uncomfortable or anything. I was glad as hell he'd felt like he could share this sexual side with me. "I gotta warn you... it's been a couple days since I've gotten off. But if I cum quick, I'm pretty sure I could go again."

"For real?" Wells asked, excitedly. That excitement fed my own horns.

"For real, Wells. If you're up for a longer session."

"God, man, yeah, I am." Then. "I can't believe we're fucking doing this, but it's crazy hot," he admitted, and I loved that he admitted it.

We didn't have the alcohol this time. In some way that made what was about to happen even hotter, but it also lent an awkwardness about how this was going to go down.

"Um.... you prefer to get head standing?" Carson asked. Just hearing that in his bro voice was enough to get me goin.

"I prefer it anyway you wanna give it, Wells," I smiled. This wasn't a Grindr trick, but it wasn't boyfriend/husband sex. Intuitively, I knew to keep up the buddy vibe with Carson, to keep him at ease.

"Why don't you stand, Bill," he said after thinking a second. "It'll be easier for me."

I followed his lead, watching as his gym built body got settled in on his sofa. I undid my belt and got into the look of anticipation on his face as he watched me unzip.

"Niiicee," he said as he watched my hard dong poke out. His eyes didn't leave my crotch. "You got a nice dick, Boss," he added.

"Help yourself," I encouraged. I'd really never fooled around with straight or even straight-ish dudes like Carson, so I didn't know how much I should talk or not talk, but the guy seemed to be into an easy rapport. I didn't do anything but put my hands on my hips and let him explore at his own pace.

Carson started with the licking, like he was measuring the hill he was gonna climb. Long swipes up my thick tool, wetting me down in the process. His trimmed beard made him look both younger and older than his 30 years. I imagined him doing this in whatever fraternity house he live in during college.

I let out a soft gasp when the sales guy finally parted his lips and began going down on me. I didn't know what made Carson Wells tick and maybe I never would, but I couldn't fault his enthusiasm for sucking dick. The guy made love to my cock. There was no other way to put it. Alternating long, wet strokes of his mouth with some suction action, then pulling off to kiss and lick my cock.

"Nice, man," I encouraged. Not wanting to break the spell, but feeling Wells needing some positive feedback for what he was doing.

He didn't suck me too fast, but I was hornier than I realized and had to think of a million things to keep from coming right away. If Wells wanted to take his time, I was gonna let him.

"You might want to pull off, man," I urged quietly, that gonna-cum tension in my voice.

Carson backed off, giving my dick head a little kiss as it pulled out. A string of spittle connected it with his lips and then broke, landing on his beard. For some reason I found that very hot and my dick spurted out some pre.

"Fuck," he laughed and leaned in to swoop it with his tongue. "I got you worked up," he stated, not even a question.

"You have," I replied. "I hope you don't mind me saying this Wells, but you're really good at this."

Carson knew what I was getting at. He had a quiet serious expression as he put his hand on his thighs and stared at my prick. "I don't mind, Boss. Thanks." He looked up at me finally. "So... what do you like when you get head?"

"What do I like?" I asked. I wasn't sure exactly what he was asking.

"Yeah," he said with a grin. "What's your favorite approach... the thing that will get you off hardest."

I let out a heavy breath. "Honestly, Carson... I don't think you wanna know my favorite thing."

He seemed surprised. "Why not?"

There was something about the sincerity of his response that almost had me telling him. "It's a little more, I don't know... extreme."

He let out a little laugh. "Damn, Boss, I didn't picture you as the kinky type."

I shrugged. "Well, I am... at least when it comes to oral," I replied. "But for real, Carson, I love it all. Just love getting head. You had me real close just now."

That seemed to satisfy the guy. He turned his attention back to my dick. "You into deep throat, Boss?"

"Hell yes, I am," I assured him.

He was measuring me with his eyes. "It's been a long time since I've sucked one as big as you," he said, matter of factly. "The length but also the thickness."

"Just do what you feel like, Wells," I said. This wasn't some Grindr cockslut, and I wanted him to feel at ease. "But I'd love to see you try."

He nodded. "Yeah, I wanna," he said. Then Carson started taking me in again, going down on me steadily. He reached about the five inch mark, which was the maximum he'd taken so far. Wells paused at that spot, giving some shallow bobs to test out his throat. Then like a swimmer taking that last jump into cool ocean water, the dude just went for it.

I watched excitedly as Wells buried his nose in my pubes, with a deep grunt stifled in his throat.

"Fuck yes!" I cried. Then, "Oh fuck, that's hot."

It was too. Because it was this hot finance bro, the coworker I had only professional relationship with. A younger, fit dude who I didn't know, not really. And he was now showing off that deep throat.

Until he needed air, or a break. He pulled back to suck in some quick air, breathing out a soft "fuck" as he eyed up my spit wet dong. He took a little breather, then went back to it. He now was giving me some genuine deepthroat head. Up and down, about three inches at a time, swallowing to the root on each go. His throat felt snug as hell and the visuals were only adding to my pleasure.

"I'm gonna cum, Carson!" I hissed. This time I hoped he wouldn't pull off. I really wanted to nut right down his cocksucking throat.

He didn't stop, but rather kept at it. If anything his pace grew a little faster. The sounds got sloppier and I could feel wet spit drip down my balls. That did it. "FUCk!" I cried. I wasn't always a screaming in bed, but I liked to let loose with when a guy sucks me, to give him that feedback.

Carson pulled off, riding out my ejaculation by sucking the top three inches. Apparently he liked tasting a guy's cum too. Or maybe his throat needed a break.

He had a proud smile when he pulled off. He knew he'd done a hell of a job, but I also think I was more dick than he'd deep throated before.

"That was incredible, Bill."

I was catching my breath. "Hell yes, it was," I said. I looked down at my dong which was quickly softening. "I don't you know, Carson... you may have completely drained me with that one."

He chuckled, and I think he liked that he'd gotten me off so well. "That's cool, Boss. But maybe we can do this again soon? Sorry if I've been standoffish lately. It's just a little weird... you know, the work thing."

"You know my lips are sealed, Wells," I assured him. "Fuck, I can't let this get out either."

He flashed me that frat-boy smile then broke the postcoital glow. "Listen, Bill. I should probably get ready for the evening. I'm meeting some buddies in a bit."

"Oh yeah," I muttered as I tucked back in and made myself presentable again. "Well, thank you for getting my weekend off to an incredible spot."

Carson stood up to walk me out. I could tell he was still hard in his trousers. I wondered if he was going to jerk off when I was gone or get off later. I thought of asking him, but didn't.

"Just to be clear, Boss," he said before showing me out. "I don't date guys. At all."

"No worries, Wells," I replied. "I'm not looking for a boyfriend. And I get it."

"Cool," was all he said. I got the sense he had some of that straight-dude second thoughts creeping in now. Or maybe coworker second thoughts.

I tried to downplay anything overly affectionate at that moment. I didn't want to be brusque but I thought being all business would help him. "See you next week, Carson," I said when he opened the door.

He nodded, then as I walked out, he shut the door behind me.

#drakestories

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icannotgetoverbirds · 1 year

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i am making a request

So I need to start doing more cooking as I work towards my independence and whatnot as an adult. I'd love to find some good recipes. No big deal, I can just look them up online or in the cookbooks we have in the house, right?

Apparently not, unfortunately. I was very quickly reminded of the reality of this when I went to check the instant pot cookbook that a friend had given us. Just some recipes for that particular appliance, should be fine - aaaand it's a diet book.

So, needless to say, I haven't been doing this for quite some time (or else that wouldn't have surprised me in the slightest). Many, many recipe books and sites center around dieting and weight loss, or will even just mention in their recipes that it's good for such things - regardless if that's the point of the recipe.

I really, really don't need that kind of nonsense when I'm just trying to feed myself and practice self-care, so this is a call to everybody who knows anything about cooking, recipes, and/or fat activism. Preferably all three.

Do y'all know of any good cookbooks, recipe websites, etc, that are at least half-decent about, like, Not Doing That? Whether they're neutral or body-positive, that helps. This post will be linked in my pinned post (which I will hopefully organize soon) so that it's easier to find.

Just, like, recipes that don't have fatphobia/sizeism/diet culture woven into them, whether it's the description or trashing the quality for the purpose of weight loss or anything else like that. Thanks in advance!

Thin people are welcome to reblog and contribute but don't clown on this post or you will be blocked.

Edit: if you're looking for recipes, please check the notes! As much as I'd like to make this a long-ass masterlist of recipes, recipe books, etc, I could absolutely see this getting away from me, so do keep that in mind. I'll try to keep as much as I can in one chain, though!

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nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos · 8 months

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So imposter syndrome is a thing and I need to give myself a pep talk. Like. Now.

And if anyone else is dealing with it needs one, then I'm sharing it. This is pretty personal, but I don't like the thought of anyone dealing with this because I know how utterly miserable it is, and absolutely no one deserves it.

So I just want to take a minute (or an hour, or several) to talk about this because I realized during the past decade (or longer), when I wasn't letting anyone read any of my writing whatsoever, that imposter syndrome is a lying fucking thundercunt, and that it hurts so many creators, and that it shouldn't be allowed to exist at all.

I got burned out constantly when I was publishing on fanfiction.net back in the day, and another site I can't remember the name of for original work that doesn't exist anymore.

Would get stuck in a rut on everything I wrote and never finish anything.

Good or bad feedback, didn't matter. It always devolved into, "This is shit, and I am shit, and I shouldn't be shoveling this shit to other people," and I'd try to just ignore that and write and...nothing would come out. Or what did come out, I felt like it wasn't ever good enough.

I'd read over what I had already written and just cringe. Cancel a project entirely and trash it because thinking about it made me want to vomit.

The same way you might cringe hearing your own voice on a recording, or see an unflattering photograph of yourself and second guess everything about what you see in the mirror.

This always led slap into a writer's block, which for me also tends to lead toward depression and general self-loathing because I don't feel like me when I'm not writing.

Same thing has happened on and off with most of my hobbies through the years. I started getting deeply into culinary arts when I was sixteen, wanted to learn more and try new recipes out daily, and messing something up would just destroy me. I started playing guitar at thirteen, played daily through most of high school, and went through a few stints that lasted for literal years where just looking at a guitar made me physically sick because I felt like I had hit a wall that I couldn't get past.

I guess because writing has been with me for the longest, it was what helped me the most. I was writing silly little "horror" short stories and Pokémon fanfiction as early as six years old. Writing is ingrained into me to the point that I feel like a different person entirely when I'm not doing it. I feel like I don't know myself.

And that feeling of being inadequate when I was actively writing, I realized, didn't actually start until I began letting other people read what I was writing regularly. Largely when I started posting it online. That was when it went from being my joy to being my dread.

Dread that if I didn't finish a chapter or a story quickly enough, people would stop reading.

Fear of making even one single typo that someone might point out.

Fear of being insulted or berated.

Of not being good enough.

Of failing.

I realized during my extensive haitus from writing that I never had that fear when I was a child. When I was writing for me. Writing what I wanted to. What I enjoyed, what made me happy. That at some point, writing had changed from a form of self-love into people-pleasing.

I spent a few years not writing at all, and gradually started again. A short story here or there when the mood struck instead of trying to force it out. That made the mood strike more and more often.

I eventually bit the bullet and read over some of my old work that I would cringe over, and it made me smile instead. Still made me cringe a little, but instead of that resulting in a need to pull into a shell and stop entirely, it turned into a desire to improve.

It clicked that it was because the only audience I had was myself, and I could do whatever the hell I wanted and just have a good time with it. No worries, no deadlines, no one to impress, just creating what I wanted to and enjoying it.

It's not fool-proof, but when the feeling starts to flare up, the following is a rough inner monologue of how I try to address it.

"Look self, who cares if you're a talentless hack or not? If you like doing the thing, do the thing. If it only brings you joy when other people care you're doing the thing, or you only do the thing when you're hoping it could even potentially impress other people? Then you're not enjoying the thing, you're enjoying the attention, or even just the idea of attention. Take the attention out of the entire equation, and just do the goddamned thing."

Art is passion in physical form. Passion stems from happiness. That happiness stems from you. From you, looking at what you've created, before anyone else has laid eyes on it, and smiling. That moment when you finish your creation, the feeling of fulfillment in knowing that you created something that wouldn't otherwise exist if you hadn't taken the time and energy to do so. That one moment before any potential second guessing or anxiety can rear its head in. That moment, that comes from you and only you, free of any influence from the outside world, is happiness.

Basically, the old saying, "dance like no one's watching?" It applies to everything. EVERYTHING that imposter syndrome could butt its disgusting lying filthy head in on. Sing, play [instrument of choice] like no one's listening. Paint and draw and sculpt and mold and create like no one else but you is ever going to see the finished product. Write like no one else is reading. Enjoy it for what it gives you first and foremost. Extend that moment of happiness and enjoy it, because you did something no one but you could have done, you created something that no one but you could have created.

After that, if other people enjoy it, great! It's always nice to share happiness!

If they don't like it, or if they pressure you to do better or work faster or harder than you're capable of doing in your present state?

If they take your peace and mold it into pain?

Then they can take a flying fuck at a rolling donut.

It's your passion. It's your love. Not theirs.

If they don't like it, they don't have to look.

If you were kind enough to share your happiness with them, and they're miserable enough to stomp on it in any way, shape, or form, then that's their problem, not yours.

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self-loving-vampire · 5 months

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Multi-axis kink game, assuming that they mean Eros as in "pleasantness of the physical sensation regardless of context" and agape as "how enticing it feels as an idea regardless of how it would feel sensorily", despite those not correlating to traditional definitions of those terms at all, it's just me guessing the OP's intent:

Doing stuff with cum more complex than shooting it into orifices from the source. Like cumswapping or drinking from a glass or that cumwalk exhibitionism thing or incorporating into recipes or papier-mâché

Hm... I think those definitions kind of make general sense but in my case I kind of detach how something would realistically feel from the fantasy to begin with.

I like a few things that I know would be pretty unpleasant to actually experience and which realistically include many side effects I'm not into (like anything involving pregnancy) and my solution to that is to just use the more fantastical version of the event rather than the realistic one and basically invent new sensory expectations about this alternative version.

My imagination is potent enough that even these false expectations can produce pleasant physical sensations if I imagine myself experiencing them.

For example, consider the experience of being bitten. I personally don't have any feelings towards it in mundane contexts. It would not really accomplish anything if someone was to physically bite me. I would just feel nothing about it.

But if I was in the mindset that the bite was the kiss of a vampire, I could make myself physically experience pleasure from it simply because my concept of a vampire bite feels extremely good.

So "eros" and "agape" are just intertwined in that way for me. The right fantasy can alter my physical sensations. It's why sometimes when I'm having a chronic pain flare I like to imagine that I just participated in a dramatic fantasy battle to help transform the pain into pleasure by eroticizing it.

It's probably not a surprising piece of information given that I use mental replacement as a loophole to circumvent my otherwise extremely strong disinterest in actually doing anything sexual.

With all of that in mind, let's rate cum.

Simplicity: 7

The one thing in this category that seems all that desirable to me is the concept of "cum marking". That is, cumming inside someone and treating the scent or sight of the cum as a mark of ownership (works better with species that have powerful noses, like wolf girls).

This doesn't really require anything beyond what normal sex would, but still works far better in some settings than in others. I'd say that it doesn't really work in a non-magical modern setting at all.

I'm not really into the other possibilities myself, though. I have a breeding kink, so stuff like cum drinking just feels like it's taking the situation to a less appealing place.

Of course, this is also complicated by the idea of fantasy cum with unusual properties (such as if it doubles as an aphrodisiac). I think that still works best when it is used in a way that can get someone pregnant.

Eros: 2

I don't think the taste or texture are very good to begin with, and as mentioned above breeding just ends up being strongly favored on a basic level.

Agape: 2

While in theory there are many non-breeding uses for cum, none of them really feel that interesting to me specifically.

Narrative Possibility: 8

The idea is broad enough that it covers many possibilities, I suppose.

Problematicity: 2

Maybe if you leaned into some kind of dominance/submission thing with it but otherwise it's probably going to be considered weird rather than morally offensive. It feels like one of those "safe" kinks that people could joke about on this site without worrying too much about controversy, like they used to do with vore and piss.

Standard Score (How much I like it): Too general for me to say. It covers a lot of very different things that I have different feelings about. I think in general it's easier to answer questions about slightly more specific kinks rather than whole categories.

#perverse insight #long post

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firespirited · 1 year

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Managed to list the monster high stock and dolls. I'd been putting it off in the distant hope that i'd show improvement enough to warrant waiting. It's stupid I have plenty of projects kept and there will always be gunky bundles. Still my brain bought this and that for a reason and I had often had something specific planned, so a sense of, not quite obligation but when each doll head was in hand there were moments of "well this one only would require an hour or two to complete the vision" and "that one's so rare I'll never see that again while I have the right supplies".

Bratz spare clothes and project dolls tomorrow. Kiwi too. Not sure whether to split Barbie and other 1/6 from 1/7th Licca and Anthro. I have to keep the momentum and remember the relief. It's so SILLY having to go through the same mental blocks every time. I post in the hopes it'll make me cringe someday and maybe learn something.

If you're in the EU, you can still get the whole lot for $100 shipped (if it's not western eu it might be a bit more shipping) massive bargain for you and no ebay hassle for me.

Then new shelves/glass cupboards for the Rainbow High and possibly a few anthro hybrids. Now that the collection has more monsters and novis, they won't be out of place.

There's been an odd sense of loss of identity with not being able to customize but it's so much easier seeing how many people know how to reroot now and also letting myself enjoy being a collector (occasional restyler!) who doesn't have to do anything spectacular to enjoy a doll.

January pushed me out of my habits to learn some minor bead embroidery skills and I did some fun upcycling with clear plastic, silica beads and plastic ab rhinestones. It was a fun exercise in using unusual materials and reminded me that I love a challenge and the odd far more than a full pallette of high quality hair colours.

I have not made any progress on the recoding of the tutorials. I might be motivated if there's a section on the new doll collector site. Hard to get hyped/panicked enough: Tumblr's not ideal for the search engines but at least it's stable for now and people can ask questions directly on posts, spam's minimal, you build a rapport with other doll folks.

I do my walks, my exercises, and just have to hope that it's doing something. I can't build muscle like a normal person just have to measure in how many seconds before collapse or full body trembles. Patience is a virtue I've never had. The high pain shock collar built into my neck with a instant to 48h delay is having to do the work of keeping me on track lol.

On an unrelated tangeant, i really hope AI hype craps out soon. I hated the new 'predictive/most searched' google update, it basically broke the internet for me to not get the most accurate results for my searches.

I have zero interest in having a bot tell me what I really want to hear from some random blogger who happens to be into that subject or who sees a link between that subject and another. That's what this is for, to hear from other people not have their thoughts filtered through algorithms to give me an all sides version of the story. I don't want the review that's a condensed consensus matching the 80% of 2 star reviews I want to hear from the three dweebs who adore this film for entirely different reasons (the train schedule and effects are totally correct and it's the one vhs they used to watch with the neighbour and quote it as in jokes, it's also got great practical effects and it was filmed in a place that is now knocked down but used to be their workplace.) People make the internet interesting. I don't want the information without the superfluous personal ramblings attached. Give me the anecdote with the recipe, it's far less intrusive than the five adverts and I'll remember the recipe as the one that he found in a book about Greece and he's never been but he dreams about it sometimes.

#saf #Ramblings

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sweetswesf · 2 years

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Check In

What I Did Today

Prayed

Cleaned my produce & packed up my fridge I just cleaned

Had a call with a recruiter from one of the companies I'd like to work for

Chatted with an old friend

Cried tears (happy & sad ones) watching muva

youtube

What I Learned Today

A serving of udon has the same amount of carbs

Not today, but recently, peaches are TOTALLY a summer fruit...learning to appreciate eating produce more seasonally as opposed to being mad I can't get certain foods year round

I need to buy some chili oil

the company I want to work for's interview process

Tumblr FINALLY added an auto save function because their site keeps crashing on long post edits

I had been real irresponsible with my produce: so much dirt that I thought a quick rinse would fix

Feeling

I did have the runs today, but not a severe headache sooo...need to figure out what's up...

Honestly, angry. Sad. I have such a ball of emotions. Can’t trust anyone. Feel out of control. Burnt out but feel such an urge to perform and do what I’ve never felt before; had a nice dream of an old friend that is enemy, but they were not AT ALL in my dream; today an old friend, but different from the one in my dream, who broke my heart hit me; there was excitement, then relief when I thought I would be able to relate to someone in a real vulnerable way who has known me before moving here to San Francisco who isn’t my pastor mentor, but then crashed when I realized it wasn’t that at all and he was just hitting me to stroke his ego because he knew he could manipulate me in that way…and I fell for it…and I stress ate, and didn’t start today like I wanted to, and then I hopped on LinkedIn and read a post from this ex-Amazon VP that basically said, if you were let go, you are expendable, and he was right, and then I just felt so much embarrassment, and questioning what I want to do with my life or where I want to be, because I have not been happy since like June 2010…and I’m so frustrated at my family for abandoning me and I really just wanted to run away, but to where? And hating all the entitled ass white neighbors I have and not knowing where I want to be in the world, not knowing if I will find peace here; and I’m tired of having random headaches; and I’m tired of people just inserting their way into my life and just not even listening to what I am saying, just trying to “fix” me in their way; I am grateful for what I’m going through and know that it is a rough time and things will get better, but I’m just so tired

Takeaways

I should follow more recipes; I made a bomb ass udon from Pinterest:

Goals After Today

Strengthen my relationship with God

Understand the main concepts I need to from Interview Cake, AlgoExpert, etc. in less 3 months

Drop my body fat percentage

Use social media/YouTube less

Improve my relationship with my family

Be more confident & faithful

Move more during my day

DRINK MORE WATER!

Get back on the ball

Be kinder to myself and stop guilting myself if my energy isn't always on 100%

Go on a date with a guy I actually like who actually likes me too

Find a therapist

Figure out what keeps making me sick...

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timeless-toaster · 8 months

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OOC: The Test of Time Challenge modified challenge rules

So I finally decided to modify the rules for myself. For the actual rules scroll down. Now I'm gonna be talking about the why. Why do I wanna have my version of the challenge?

Well, first of all, I have my own ideas that I think would add to this challenge, while I also have some rebalancing ideas I thought of while playing/playtesting the challenge. I really do love this challenge, and I feel like I could improve it.

The other reason is that I'd prefer removing the skin tone related restrictions in this challenge (that's why I started playing with the Pleasantsims modifications). I'd also like to use some different language while refering to some aspects.

While I generally think the Pleasantsims version is fine, due to recent events with the owner of the site, I no longer want to link to her and I try to find alternative resources to the site.

Now... Onto the actual rules. Disclaimer: I'll only write the rules for the current stage I'm playing. This post will be updated slowly!

I strongly reccomend you to bend and break these rules for your likings.

What is the Test of Time Challenge about?

The general idea of the challenge, is starting out at the beginning of time, with a few couples, and following their descendants throughout all the major stages of history. The rules change according to time periods, but there are some general rules that apply to every period, unless specified otherwise. This challenge is built on the rotational playstyle, as you will be switching between multiple households from the start.

General Rules:

You can only add new sims to your hood at the beginning of a new stage. Only one sim can be added at a time. This sim could look any way and they can be any class. They could also be supernatural sims like vampires or witches or whatever you want.

All your families must have a method of choosing the heir. You could have a family where the heir is always the oldest man, you could have a family where the heir is always the oldest woman. You could also have a family where the heir is chosen through ritualistic battle, or some kind of test.

The sim marrying into the family always has to take the family name.

If anyone gets into a fight, the loser must die. They can take some time to succumb to their wounds, but do it quickly, with whatever method you choose.

When sims Woohoo, they always must try for baby. Sorry, reliable contraception took some time to develop.

Switch stages after the first grandchild of the "stage starting" adult becomes an adult.

You can add any amount of pets at any time. However you have to be able to feed them just like you feed your sims. (Refer to rule number 9.)

Try to remain logical and period approriate with the items and CC. However you do not have to be perfect historically accurate, I'm not here to give you sleepless nights of researching the lives of people in the middle ages, and desperately trying to find that one perfectly approriate undergarment for your sims.

Food must come from a source. This source could be gathering, farming, fishing or buying it from other sims who did the hard part for you. Food must be made by stocking the ingredient or ingredients used into the fridge first. You can make up your own recipes.

The technology and living enviroment of your sims can change gradually throughout the stage. No need to play for 50 hours with the same basic stuff, that would become boring. It would also be unrealistic to just flip a switch and suddenly go from sleeping under the stars to having a palace.

If the given period has no way of keeping the food items from going wrong, you have to sell every food item in your sim's inventory after an X amount of time. I personally do this every 3 days, cause that's how long my rounds are and leave enough for only one portion. The exception are non heir teens and children, cause they'll gather the food that will be immediately sold if they move out so they can start their adult life easier, or can give it as a marriage gift in the form of funds.

You're not allowed to dig for treasure.

Optional:

Sims from the same family must all dress in their assigned family colors. This just helps with quickly identifying and separating your families. Heirs can have something identifying them through their clothing.

Roleplay. If you wanna do something, think about how that would be possible. For example: you have a lot of money in one family, and think about building a bigger and more complex house for them. Would that be possible or period appropriate? You could say that it's a family with a lot of people in it, and the family members are in good connection with each other, so it could be possible for them to do bigger projects like that.

Use sim hobbies to introduce new items, like a sim with Music & Dance hobby could invent instruments. A sim with the Science hobby could invent the telescope, etc.

Tribal Stage Rules:

This is where the challenge starts. I decided to rename this stage, from "Neanderthal Stage" cause I feel like this one captures the feel of the stage better for me.

First of all, you need a place for your sims to live in. Create a neighbourhood with all time Summer. They're blessed with a perfect weather for farming, but they're cursed by getting roasted while being outside.

You can reset the sims temperature at night. Technically this is not a Tribal Stage exclusive rule, but I think it's gonna be the most relevant here. Your sims can cool off, since the air cools off when the sun is gone. If you wanna be extra realistic you could wait a few hours after night falls.

Sims can only interact with sims that are considered to be part of the challenge. So I strongly recommend you to get the Visitor Controller mod if you don't already have it, or you could just pretend that the random walkbys don't exist.

Couples must Woohoo at least once every 24 hours. However mothers who just gave birth can take a day off, unless they decide to do it anyway with your ACR on.

Sims can't get jobs.

Your sims can visit community lots, but more on those later.

When a sim grows up into an adult, and they're not the heir, they need to move out. They'll get the default 3000 simoleons for moving into the same sized lot as their parents, plus they'll take their belongings if they have any, and the plants and food they gathered.

Graves need to stay on their original lots. Exception are child graves, more on that later.

Your sims can't read. Writing, and especially books haven't been invented yet. Of course this means you can't put down any bookcases and you must cancel any autonomous reading.

How to start the Tribal Stage:

First and foremost create a neighbourhood and gather up your preferred amount of CC. Now you have to populate your place.

Create 5 pairs of adults. You'll need to create them according to these characteristics:

2 couples with Skin 4

2 couples with Skin 1

1 mixed couple with one of them being Skin 2 and the other one being Skin 3

Feel free to ignore this part if you're using custom skin colors, but if you're sticking to basegame, this will ensure you to have pretty varied genetics. Everyone is just gonna end up having black hair and Skin 2 and 3 anyway, lol.

You can freely choose your hair and eye colors.

Optional: Create a story for your couples to know where they came from, why did they move to this new place and how they met each other.

Now it's time to move in everyone. Keep in mind that after you move in your families, you need to set their funds to 3000 simoleons.

Lots in Tribal Stage:

Family lots:

These must be 2x2 lots.

These lots must contain a water source.

These lots must contain the following items (or CC that functions the same way): a stove, a fridge, a table with at least 2 chairs, a counter, a sink, a dresser, a loveseat, a double bed/tent, something for trash collecting, and a toilet.

These plots must have plants or gardening plots for farming.

Everything listed above must be purchised with the starting money of 3000 simoleons.

Community Lots:

You can have any community lot that you like, but you have to keep them natural and you can't have "sim buildings" on it. No one owns these places, so no one wants to build here, they just come here to hang out or gather something.

Examples for lots: forest, hot springs, waterfall, cave, meadow, etc. If you really want some buildings you could have some ruins from an unknown civilization before humanity or whatever you can come up with.

Regarding the cemetery: by the rules of the stage, you need to let the graves stay on their original lot, however, I'd personally recommend you to have a cemetery for the sole reason of ghost children. If by any chance you get one, I would rather send them to an outside burial side, cause I never had children ghosts and I don't know how bad they get with the glitching.

Now everything is ready to play. Don't stress on the rules, go, modify what you want, cause what's important is that you have fun with it.

Finishing the Tribal Stage:

Congratulations, you reached the time of change. Or you're just reading this in advance.

What you have to do now, is some cool **math**, and gather all your families with the same names, and add up how much money they have in total.

This is gonna be important, cause the next stage will introduce the following classes:

Ruling Class (includes the Emperor)

Upper Class/Patricians

Lower Class/Plebeians

Servants

Obviously, the family with the most amount of money will be the ruling class, the next one with the most money will be the patricians and so forth. Keep in mind, that the ruling class is just one family, and there should be less families in higher classes than in the lower classes.

The rest should be taken care of in the Ancient Stage.

Ancient Stage Rules:

I renamed this stage from "Roman Stage" cause I'd like to explore more than just the Roman Empire. I also like to keep my Sims game away from references to the real world.

WARNING: This section is not playtested yet, and I will probably change it in the future. For now this is how I'm planning to play.

The weather has changed. Now your sims will live in changing seasons consisting of a humid and a dry period. (Set the weather to Summer -> Summer -> Spring -> Spring.)

A broad range of new objects have been unlocked for you to use. This is rather straighforward on what you can use or not, but if you're not sure if something specific has been invented yet, then you can freely consult your search engine.

Class Specific Rules:

Ruling Class:

Allowed Lot Size: Large.

The heir of your Ruling Class family becomes the Emperor/Empress.

Ruling Class are only allowed to marry Upper Class. If there aren't any Upper Class avaliable, then you can use the Lower Class for pairing.

Your Emperor/Empress will hire two servants, who will live at the palace. They'll do the housework, and in return they'll get a salary that they can send back home to their families. (I don't have a specified amount for it yet.) You can build them their own living space.

The teens of the Ruling Class can attend school. (You can also choose someone from the Ruling-Upper Class to be a teacher.)

The heir teen of the Emperor/Empress can take a job in Politics.

Sims who're not the heir must move out when they become adults.

Upper Class:

Allowed Lot Size: Large-Medium

Jobs Allowed: Politics, Medicine, Military, Law Enforcement, Science, Education.

Upper Class is able to marry up into Ruling Class. Requirements for this: sim must have a good relationship with the parents/guardians of their desired mate and they must have a $3,000 worth of gift in their inventory. To marry the Emperor/Empress, the same applies, but they must have a gift equaling $5,000.

Upper Class can marry Lower Class.

They can hire 1 servant per household.

Teens may go to school, however they can't take jobs. They can work on some profession at home.

Can own community businesses.

Lower Class:

Allowed Lot Size: Medium

Jobs Allowed: Military, Education, Architecture, Artist (may take lower ranks only).

Lower Class can marry up in rank to Upper Class. Requirements: sim must have a good relationship with the parents/guardians of the desired mate and they must have a $1,000 worth of gift in their inventory.

Can't hire servants.

Teens may go to school, however they can't take jobs. They can work on some profession at home. Lower Class teens can be hired as servants only by the Ruling Class.

Servants:

Allowed Lot Size: Small

Jobs Allowed: Criminal, hired by a family.

If a Servant Class is hired to work at a family, they can't take a job.

Servant Class can marry up into Lower Class. Requirements: none, however if they don't have a good relationship with their desired mate's parents/guardians, they won't be welcome in the family, and won't get into higher class, instead, their spouse will rank down.

Just before a Servant gets married, they have to move out onto their own lot from the family's house they're hired by. Therefore they won't be employed by them anymore.

Servants are not allowed to own anything that costs more than $1,000, as it would seem suspicious. If a member of the Ruling Family or someone who works in Military/Law Enforcement walks by, they'll be charged with stealing. More on that later.

Crime:

With a structured society there came laws. The following are now punishable:

killing someone (severe)

fighting someone outside of an agreed duel (severe)

stealing (moderate)

working in the Criminal career (lol) (moderate)

not paying taxes (moderate)

gossiping about a Ruling Class member (minor)

Sims will only get punished if their crime is witnessed. You can also say that the witness present might not report them for some reason. Feel free to play around with this.

Punisments:

For severe crime: prison with variable sentence (can be lifelong)

For moderate crime: prison with shorter sentence

For minor crime: 1 day of "communal work" at the mine (or any place you can think of)

On the case of the Criminal career:

Sims who work in the Criminal career have a starting chance of "getting caught" at 3% per each day they go to work. With every level they gain in the Criminal career, this chance goes up by 3% per level. (This number is subject to change.)

To be continued.

-----------------------

Thank you for reading this far. If you're interested in the challenge, and updates to my rule modifications, be sure to not lose this post in the unending vortex of the internet. Also feel free to give me any feedback. See you next time!

#ts2 #test of time challenge #test of time challenge rules #sims 2 gameplay rules #sims 2 tot

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danidanialsblog · 10 months

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Beauty Bliss Skin Cream Reviews And Scam Alert!

The 'Beauty Bliss Skin Cream & Eye Cream,' one of Beauty Bliss's newest products, has gotten a lot of attention, especially in the US. Many people agree that these items make makeup unnecessary because they smooth and even out the skin's tone.

In this review, I'll talk about how the Beauty Bliss Skin Cream & Eye Cream worked for me, focusing on its texture, results, ingredients, and how well it lives up to its name.

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What is Beauty Bliss Cream for Skin?

The SPF protection in Avaivy's Beauty Bliss Skin Cream works well with the natural ingredients in the cream. Its unique recipe is meant to deeply moisturize, soothe, and repair your skin, leaving it feeling refreshed and renewed.

Beauty Bliss Skin Cream is a natural skin care product made to fight age signs like fine lines and wrinkles. This cream gives your skin the important ingredients it needs to rebuild and renew the layers that hold it together.

With a mix of herbal and all-natural ingredients and carefully chosen peptides, this cream promotes a brighter face, restores radiance, improves skin hydration, and makes skin firmer and tighter. These benefits help make a person look younger and brighter. Read Beauty Bliss Skin Cream Reviews to learn more about the good things people have said about this product.

My Experience with Beauty Bliss Skin Cream | Before & After

Hello Readers, Before I go any further with my Beauty Bliss Skin Cream Review, I'd like to tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Emma, and I write material and blog full-time.

After seeing TikTok videos where people raved about Beauty Bliss Skin Cream, I was interested enough to order it from Amazon. As a stay-at-home mom, I don't usually wear a lot of makeup, but this Beauty Bliss Anti-Aging Face Cream is great for easy daily coverage.

Since I have a light tan, the color SAND works well with my skin tone. I don't need much, and it goes on smoothly and stays in place all day.

Even though it's a mix of different products, such as moisturizer, primer, SPF, foundation, anti-aging skin treatment, and concealer, it feels so light that it's like you're not wearing anything at all, but it makes your skin look bright and healthy.

I love that it's vegan, and my very sensitive skin hasn't had any bad reactions to it at all. Also, unlike other anti-aging creams I've used before, it doesn't make my eyes feel like they are burning.

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Why I like using this Beauty Bliss skin cream?

Even though I have very sensitive skin, I like that this Beauty Bliss Skin Cream didn't make it worse.

Also, there are different shades so that it can be worn by people with different skin tones.

Also, it goes into my skin easily and leaves behind a smooth feel.

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How do you use Beauty Bliss Cream?

This amazing skin formula is made with high-quality ingredients that can help feed the skin. It works well to improve the general quality of the skin and brings back moisture and collagen levels. When you put the cream on, it goes deep into the skin and makes it feel fresh from the inside out.

With the help of collagen and peptides, the mixture gets rid of dead skin cells and encourages the growth of new, healthy skin cells. Aloe Vera, which is part of the recipe, makes the skin softer and more radiant. This gives the skin a healthy, full look.

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How Beauty Bliss Anti-Aging Face Cream Is Made

Here are the most important ingredients in Beauty Bliss Anti-Aging Face Cream, each of which is good for the skin:

Collagen: Because it is a main part of skin, collagen is very important for making skin look younger and healthier. Collagen fights the signs of aging by smoothing out wrinkles and giving the face a more young look.

Vitamin C: Also called "Ascorbic Acid," vitamin C has been shown to be good for the skin. A 2013 study showed that Vitamin C could help avoid and treat skin changes caused by sun exposure. It also works well to treat acne.

Cucumber extract is a superfood for your face that has amazing anti-aging effects. Cucumber extract makes cells stronger, so they stay hydrated and work well. It also slows down the age-related breakdown of cells.

Aloe Vera is a herbal plant product that is known for making the skin soft. A study has shown that Aloe Vera can help reduce wrinkles and improve the elasticity of skin that has been hurt by the sun.

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Does Beauty Bliss Skin Cream Have Any Scientific Support?

The anti-aging moisturizer from Beauty Bliss has a unique recipe that works in three ways. It is full of powerful ingredients that boost the skin's natural ability to heal. This gives you skin that is firmer, smoother, and more radiant.

Also, the carefully chosen ingredients in this cream support optimal dermal hydration, which makes wrinkles and fine lines less noticeable and gives the skin a brighter look.

This amazing lotion has shown amazing results, with skin becoming 90% more hydrated and wrinkles and fine lines disappearing by an impressive 80%. The ingredients in this formula have been through a lot of study and clinical testing to prove that they can boost collagen production and even out the tone and texture of the skin. Rest assured that this product is safe and effective and has a lot of great benefits.

Benefits

This cream might be able to make wrinkles and fine lines less noticeable.

It can make the face look healthier and brighter.

Beauty Bliss can help fight against the bad effects of worry.

It can keep the balance between suppleness and moisture in the skin.

The product has chemicals that have been backed and supported by science.

Drawbacks

When you use Beauty Bliss, there is a chance that your skin will have an allergic response.

The product can only be bought online; it's not sold in stores nearby.

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Final Verdicts

I would definitely give Beauty Bliss Skin Cream an 8 out of 10. This product did a good job of covering up my flaws and giving me a soft glow. My only small complaint is that there isn't an official website. Because of this, I had to wait a few weeks before I finally got my order.

Have you had a chance to buy this amazing anti-aging face cream yet? If so, I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments part or have you read through all of our product reviews at your own pace.

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batmanisagatewaydrug · 3 years

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batmanisagatewaydrug's semi-facetious leo season gift-giving guide to treat yourself and others

hi gang, I'm just gonna say this: I don't believe in astrology, but every August I lean into, like, the MOST annoying Leo stereotypes and buy myself just a LOAD of shit, because I'm great and it's my birth month and I deserve it. to be clear I would be doing this regardless of when my birthday is, but as it happens all of my astrology bitch friends get to feel real smug 31 days a year after I've spent 11 months snorting at their assertion that space rocks and gas clouds have any bearing on their mental health and personality disorders.

ANYWAY.

when I was younger I tended to feel a bit guilty about my little birthday treats (and most other spending that was just for me), but I've mercifully grown past that shit now. one, "guilty pleasure" is a flawed concept. I'm not catholic, I don't have to feel guilty about shit. two, I have the money to do this. I'm fine. and three, best of all, all of my gifts-to-self came from smaller artists and creators, and I could NEVER feel guilty about supporting talented craftspeople just trying to make a living peddling their wares on the internet.

anyway, in the interest of further support I thought I'd compile a list of all the weird shit I've been treating myself to under the justification of my birthday and link to all the cool cool people who made this stuff. in all sincerity, they're making me very happy and I hope they make you happy too.

anyway, now that I've done the "annoying housewife prose at the start of a recipe blog" portion, let's get to the shit.

#1. Charming Little Fox

I was lured in by the honeycomb jewelry, because my wife LOVES bees and bee-themed accessories (thank god she's not on tumblr anymore, because MAJOR gift-giving spoilers), but ended up falling in love with all the unique earrings. I ended up getting this asymmetrical sun/moon pair, which makes me feel unspeakably cool every time I wear them.

#2. Skeletons in the Closet

okay, listen - my big splurge was on some of the handmade masks (filters included), namely one of these fringed baddies that's going to make me look like Orville Peck. but you've GOT to look at the clothes for sale on this site, which are some of the most gorgeous high drama gay goth shit I've ever seen in my life. velvet, fringe, and fishnet ABOUNDS.

#3. Jenny Shlemon

I'm kind of obsessed with this whole shop, which makes a lot of profane glittery iridescent resin jewelry that's EXACTLY my kind of tacky. my friend AJ got me one of their keychains for my birthday, which is shaped like a star, full of glitter, and has beads that lovingly spell out the word CUNT inside. that little gift came with a ten percent off on my next purchase. I went with these cool hoop-and-snake earrings, but I was sorely tempted by the ones that proudly proclaimed I PUT A WHOLE BAG OF JELLYBEANS UP MY ASS.

#4. Maya Kern

okay, listen. Maya Kern sure as shit doesn't need my help to sell size-inclusive, deep-pocketed skirts, which seem to instantly sell out every time a fresh batch is listed. which is why I was SO excited to snag one of these cuties covered in hands! I'm genuinely really excited to get this skirt and happy to support an independent queer artist, but this one IS also just sort of a flex that I get to wear one of these wonders on my body.

#5. Janatee Craftily

full disclosure that this is the shop of a dear, dear friend of mine, but what the fuck is the point of having a tumblr blog with followers if not to hype up your homies? this beloved chum is the master of many art forms, from crochet to jewelry to stickers to dice. this month I've been particularly hyped to receive a set of miniature rainbow dice, a glitter rainbow necklace, and a crocket halter top that are all Janatee Craftily specials.

#6. VestalKi

... aka tumblr user @kialessa. this cute little crochet water bottle holder isn't even here yet, but I'm already hype as hell to receive it. I go for a LOT of lengthy walks (probably like 3-5 a week, because pokemon go is serious fucking business) and it's hot as hell here. but I hate having to carry a water bottle around with my hands like some kind of medieval peasant (because, again, those pokemon are NOT going to catch themselves) so this is really going to revolutionize my entire life. PLUS Mack has informed me it can comfortably pull double duty as a purse??? my god, this is the gift that just keeps giving.

#7. Super Yaki

this is a movie with cute weird movie merch for cute weird movie fans, but what if, like me, you're a wretched bog hag who's never willingly engaged with pop culture in their life? well, good news: now there's Super Yaki merch for us, too! and if you happen to be a fan of Dimension 20, like me, even better news: it was designed by Kendra Wells, the artist behind the character art for The Unsleeping City! if you're not a fan of Dimension 20, just disregard that last part and look at this cool shirt.

credit for me owning this one actually goes to Rachel @dykerory, who insisted on buying it for me mere moments after I sent them this image and asked if I should buy it for myself. thanks, beloved bestie brainworm <3

#8. GreenTree Factory

one of the only other entries on this list that I didn't encounter through the internet! I met these shop owners at a local farmer's market, and was delighted by their drinks-themed candles and whimsical little soaps - so delighted that I immediately had to buy a matching lime margarita candle/soap set. the scents are phenomenal, the craftsmanship delightful, and products are extremely long-lasting. look at this - this sparks joy in my heart literally every time I light it.

#9. The Euphoric TreeFort

I met these guys at a con where I was volunteering, and it took all my willpower not to drop over 100 dollars on candles right then and there. they have some of the most unique and VIVID scents that I've ever encountered in my life, some of which frankly seem like an affront to God and science. I don't know how they managed to so perfectly capture the scent of cheese pizza in a candle, and I have no idea who would want to burn it, but I do have to admit it's very impressive. more palatable options include their orange soda scent, which I frequently just carry around my house, unlit, sniffing it and marveling at how exactly like orange soda is smells.

#10. The Bail Project

swerve - you thought this was going to be all about materialism and buying things, didn't you? it mostly is, but one of the most rewarding things I've thrown my money at in a long time is Lil Nas X's bail fund. you can make a one-time donation or do what I did, and set a small recurring donation to be charged every month. I was mostly joking when I called this a gift-giving guide, but any donation to the Bail Project could literally change the course of someone's life, and there's no better gift than that.

#long post #apologies etc

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kinfoodie · 4 years

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Heya! Happy to see you posting again [Tumblr was being so so mean to me] and I thought I'd send in a request, if it won't be too much, of course. I'd like to request a recipe/food list for Aziraphale from Good Omens. I'd prefer mildly flavored or flavorless foods, if possible. If it isnt, I defiantely dont mind slightly sour, savory and mildly sweet foods. I'd also prefer light foods, if that makes sense, as well as snack foods. Sorry for this being so long.... [[Curtis]]

Hey anon! Yes of course and sorry for the wait! It’s not too much, I’m just in and out as always but I’m really trying to siddle saddle myself in and get the ones sitting in the inbox out to the world! But I have done my best to try and get flavorless foods for you or mildly flavored food. Def just don’t season where seasoning is required (mostly because sites are vastly against not seasoning stuff so I think that will be your best!) Annnd no your message is not too long, the longer the better I get a better sense of what I’m trying to find :3 For generally light or bland foods I’d probably start getting bread and porridge and the like together... Without seasoning, the recipes below will have seasoning and flavor but I tried to trend lighter and milder but def adjust for your liking it’s what cooking is all about!

Marinated Summer Squash Salad

Pumpkin Alfredo Penne

Butternut Squash Risotto

Butternut Squash and White Bean Soup

Farro, Apple, and Carrot Salad

Pear & Walnut Salad

Creamed Potatoes

Crispy garlic roasted potatoes

Savory Sweet Potato Casserole

Pull-Apart Potato Rolls

There ya go! I hope you enjoy and if not feel free to come back and I’ll try to refill the request to the best of my ability! Cheers and happy eating~! <3

#otherkin #fictionkin #good omenskin #aziraphalekin #kin food #kin blog #ask #anon #request #bland

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goosegoblin · 5 years

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You mentioned having tips for when its too much effort to go get food ? I'm struggling a lot with that right now and I'd appreciate any advice on the topic. Have a great day!

Hi! Yes, I do in fact have tips!

If you’re in a place where money is less of an issue, things get a lot easier. Allow yourself to spend a bit more on pre-prepared things. Yes, it’s cheaper to buy a melon and slice it than it is to buy pre-sliced melon, but if you’re going to eat the latter whereas you’d just throw out the former, then buying pre-sliced is an infinitely better idea.

If you have a freezer, utilise it well. Stock up on frozen pizzas, ready meals, frozen meat/ potatoes/ veggies and whatever else you may want.

Batch-cooking when you have more energy is a really good idea too. There are loads of recipes online that freeze very well, so you can make six portions of curry on a good day and then keep them around for days when things are harder.

If food is a lot of effort and good days are not predictable, avoid buying fresh things that go off. It’s just going to make you feel shitty when you have to throw it out. Get canned, frozen or dried instead.

Remember that any food is better than no food. Try and find some easy, fairly-healthy snacks or quick meals that you can default to. Crackers and hummus or peanut butter, yoghurt with granola thrown on top, cereal, toast (bread freezes very well), bagels, instant ramen, microwave rice, pasta with jarred sauce and tinned soup are all options.

On the other hand, you can also try looking up recipes you want to make and set aside some time to cook them. I genuinely like cooking, and for me cooking a new exciting recipe with numerous steps can be a form of self-care. I play a podcast or my favourite music and focus on the steps, and at the end I get a tasty meal!

If you’re likely to forget meal times, set alarms. Setting alarms for meals is well known in the ED community as it makes meals less of an abstract thing that might occur at some point and more of a reality where you know when you need to act.

Planning in advance can help a lot. I meal plan for the week ahead using pepperplate.com and I find it really simple and useful. Often the difficulty occurs in choosing what to eat, so if I already know that I’ve removed one barrier between myself and food. If that’s too hard, try making a list of easy meals you know you like, and keep the ingredients for them in the house. That way you can look at the list when you need an idea- you can even use a random number generator to pick one (I’ve done that) if choosing is just too much.

Invite people over for meals, or try and cook with others. I’m much more likely to make a good, satisfying meal if I know I’m serving it to my boyfriend as well.

Avoid binge/restrict cycles. Eating 4000 calories one day and barely any for the next three days is not good for your body- or for your mind, to be honest. Try and eat as consistently as you can.

Try and list foods that make you happy. Not even just foods you like, but foods that make you happy. Try and incorporate these into your day. I’m more likely to get excited for a meal if it has roast vegetables than boiled, and whilst I don’t care about new potatoes I get excited about sweet potatoes.

You can incorporate reward systems if those work for you- sticker charts or sites like Habitica. The app ‘Recovery Road’ also allows you to track meals and to add a person or clinician to view your intake and keep you accountable.

If eating feels genuinely impossible, liquid calories can help keep you going. Milkshakes, smoothies, yoghurt, soup, ice cream, milky coffees, hot chocolates, juice... I find that when my blood sugar dips I feel shaky and sick and eating feels hard, even though I know I need to. Drinking some juice helps me get to a place where I feel better and more able to eat actual food.

----

Basically, the first step is to eat Some food. Any food.

The second step is to make sure you are eating enough food.

The third step is to make sure that food constitutes the ‘right’ things.

It’s okay if you’re stuck on step one or two. Step three can feel overwhelming and exhausting, but you don’t have to jump straight from ‘I’ve been living on cereal and sweets for a week’ to ‘I had a caesar salad for lunch and I’m preparing lentil ragu for dinner’. Make your goals small and reachable. Aim for X meals. Aim for X portions of fruit/veg. And please, although I know it’s hard and I’m a massive hypocrite, make sure you’re drinking enough water. Dehydration will make everything so much worse.

I hope this helped! Feel free to ask if you want any more advice, empathy or low-effort recipes- I got ‘em all!

xxx

#calories cw #eating disorders cw #food cw #Anonymous #honk response

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tonyglowheart · 2 years

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Hey there! I saw your post on norwegian christmas butter squares, and I was immediately intrigued. You see I'm norwegian myself, and I was very curious if this was a recipe that has been modified when immigrants arrived in america. They look like they're based on what we call "goro" cakes (or "gode raad" which basically means "got money", as they were expensive to make), and traditionally we use a special iron to press patterns to the cakes.

I don't know if this is of interest, but I thought I'd share anyways in case it was. It was a fun thing for me to discover. Have a good day and enjoy your butter squares!

Hi anon! That is, in fact, very interesting and fun and I'm very glad you shared ^^ I looked it up and wow there are some fancy patterns. And yeah I can believe this recipe - or some version - would be good for stamping, it held onto imprints from my hand/fingers pretty well just as is lol. This one site said goro is commonly flavored with cardamom? That sounds pretty good! Maybe I'll try that sometime, figure out how to get the flavors in baking lol. I'm glad it was fun for you to discover tho! And yeah... I wonder too if this was adapted from an old recipe by someone ^^ It very well could have been, I see some other recipes which look similar enough that I can see that being the case XD Hope you have a good day too~

#asks answered #Anonymous #and yes I did try mine already and they are amazing #they're actually not too sweet either which is rly nice #someone in the notes of the recipe post said they found dark choc overwhelming but my caramel candies are dark choc sea salt caramel #and I think they taste great. so like. personal taste ig lol #maybe one day someone will do a dive on this recipe and actually track down its provenance. that'd be cool

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sungwanns · 2 years

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oh wow your fashion sense is like hyuna's?? dude that is so cool! speaking as someone who still dresses like a very lazy emo kid from 2014 so i don't think i can borrow han's clothes even though i'd probably fit them HAHA, that sounds amazing! HAHAHA YES THO pls let us see seungmin in outfits like that! i'm imagining him with all the skin exposure, crazy hair color, and maybe some dangerous-looking boots...i think we'd all lose our minds

HAH true - they need felix for the good stuff! i'd love to taste his cookies/brownies too, and i think i found the recipes for them online but...i can't bake (;・∀・) do you enjoy cooking/baking? ahh and good idea limiting your main merch purchases to just two groups - i can't imagine having...16+ (yes i counted everything you listed) seasons greetings. i like how the groups you like have a ton of variety - do you listen to/follow other artists outside of kpop?

aww you must be too tired to dream of them ( ;∀;) i feel like i have chan's insomnia problems - no matter how tired i am, i never fall asleep quickly i should just move into 3RACHA and hyunjin's dorm since we're all up at 4 AM anyway

ahh thank you - i'm not entirely sure what having libra as my rising sign says about me (besides what the site mentioned) but i'm glad it's good! ♥ okay that's very impressive that you know their moon signs, and that's adorable you and han share the same one! ooh now i'm curious what chan's birth time implies about his personality (≧▽≦)

oh don't worry about replying late - i'm guilty of this as well (case in point, this reply LOL). ahh amigurumi tho!! that's so cute! what animals/creatures have you already made skzoo maybe?? ah, and the hat i made for myself is red (i think i made it for a cosplay? i don't remember anymore). i made it years ago and it's miraculously still alive/i still use it (*´з`) i can't really make stuff like cardigans so hats (heh) off to you! and same - i need youtube as my background when i do anything. when i make graphics, i tend to put a long documentary for background noise or i listen to the same song over and over again. what do you usually listen to when you draw, or do you not listen to anything?

...okay i feel attacked. i'm the same way about my dramas HAHAHA i still haven't watched the last ep of hotel del luna and when i do finish something, i tend to repeat episodes just because i can't let go yet - i did it with hana yori dango/boys over flowers and itazura na kiss/mischevious kiss (you can tell i love my cheesy dramas hahaha). can i just say that you watching one piece just because it's the longest anime ever is kind of amazing? i hope you have time to catch up watching during your winter break!

YES WE NEED A SKZPLAYER COMPILATION as if we haven't given enough money to JYPE yet HAHALKjsdfljk man hyunjuly (proof our birth month is the best HAHAHA) seems so long ago...i almost gave myself a headache yesterday just because i couldn't believe kingdom was just this year. too much has happened! what's your favorite kingdom stage, btw?

oohh the color you picked for the color i give off is really pretty - thank you! i like how it would go great with green (my favorite color), though thinking about it now, that'd make an eggplant (≧▽≦)

ah artist problems. since you use an easel, does that mean you paint too? or you just use that for drawing? also i hope you get a stool or something - standing in the same spot for 3 hours already sucks if you do it for just one day. ooohh zoro changbin tho...okay i'll hunt this down in your blog! now i want to see skz as all the straw hats why am i thinking of hyunjin or minho as nami so i'm manifesting that you get more free time to draw for yourself/for fun more!

HAH okay i find it kinda cool that our favorite albums are really close to each other in release, then we both have noeasy in common !(^^)! you're right tho - their comebacks just keep getting better and better! i'm happy that they're finally getting recognition for them too with all the awards and music show wins. also i'm still amused that christmas evel got a win despite no promotions

awww YESSS their outfits were on point for MAMA! 3RACHA killed it as usual and then there's seungmin's rockstar moment smashing that guitar (≧▽≦) i feel like i need to ask this to everyone i talk about MAMA to, but what did you think of the collaboration intro stage?

- your secret santa ^^

Oh thank you!! I like wearing things that other people don’t haha i think having to wear a uniform for schools from kindergarten through high school gave me an individuality complex LMAO but i know your fashion is great too!! oh my gosh that would be amazing!! Let’s switch styles for a day Min…

Omg so would i!!! I bet he puts so much love and effort into them that you can just taste the love <<3 But i do enjoy baking!! I spent all yesterday making christmas cookies it was a lot of fun!! but my phone is still all dirty from it haha i need to wipe it off!! But thank you haha!! I like all kinds of music and i swear im always getting into a new group😭 xdinary heroes im looking at you but yes i do!! let’s see i really like 5sos, conan gray, i listened to taylor swift growing up so she’s really nostalgic for me ik there’s a mixed consensus on her, one ok rock! i like american girls, start again, & wasted nights by them!!, i like simple plan too haha i’m sure there’s more i cant think of at the moment!!

maybe that’s it im always tired haha ah!! but im sorry to hear that :( but yes totally you could have some of the best conversations with 3racha at 3am im sure of it haha

well libra is ruled by venus so libra risings are known for nice symmetrical faces and well really just being pretty HAHA oh and thank you!! haha what can i say i like to learn about my boys! but knowing chan’s birth time makes him a gemini rising if i remember correctly!!

Oh you didn’t take long at all to respond haha!! ive been so busy finishing up presents and making cookies i just keep losing track of time!! Oh but ive made a bunch of stuff from like a huge jellyfish to a tiny little luffy!! I haven’t made any skzoo but ive been planning on it!! I really wanna make one of those pillows where it’s just the skzoo character’s head but i keep putting it off bc i can’t decide which one i want to start with!!😭 Oh i bet your hat is so cute!! but when im drawing i usually just listen to some music or a podcast!! I really like “This paranormal life” I love paranormal stuff but the hosts crack me up and it’s definitely more comedy based than anything!!

I do the same thing HAHA my brother always makes fun of me for rewatching shows but i just can’t let them go especially when they were already really long ones that i finished… cough supernatural cough… cheesy dramas are great though!! And please youre so sweet??? MWAH MWAH

Right HAHA like we’ve given them sm money but i would give them sm more for the skz players!! And omg it does!! It was so iconic but it feels so long ago and im so rusty with kingdom content 😭 i would probably have to rewatch some of them to get a refresher!!

Yay!! I’m glad you liked it!!! Oh i love green too it’s such a pretty color!! do you have a favorite shade of green? Or like light greens vs dark greens?

I only took drawing classes so i only used the easels for drawing!! they offer painting classes but i didn’t take any!! I’ve tried painting a little bit but i can tend to be a little impatient haha it’s hard for me to wait for the layers to dry!! omg glances at nami figure on my shelf Nami and Usopp are like my favs theyre so funny together!! minho would make an amazing nami!! they have that same sass and like fear element to them seungmin could work too when he’s roasting the other skz members LMAO and hyunjin is also great bc her and usopp are so dramatic when they get scared!! Nami’s birthday is also in july we really are the best!😌

They really do keep getting better! like every comeback im like this is it!! it can’t get better than this!! and then it does!! but i feel the same way!! Like im so glad they’re getting so much love now they deserve it for all their hard work!! omg me too!! like i remember when they got their first win and now they get them for non promoted songs i’m so proud of them :((

Stray kids’ stylist is always doing so well like thank you for constantly serving fits!! yes and seungmin!! And i love how he like jumped into those back up dancers like he was crowd surfing too!! Oh and i loved the intro!! my multi heart loves any collab stages like that!! I would’ve died if they had danced more with each other but i totally get it and i’ll take what i can get!!

Also!! I think your manifestations are working bc i pulled jisung in my christmas evel album!! I was so excited i never really pull him so thank you for your help haha!! :DD

#skzanta 21

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1-800-444-tune · 5 years

Text

New Moon is going to be according to my status calculations on my app on my Windows tablet , at 3: 41am on the 6th of March, coming up, in zodiac sidereal for the New Moon is Aquarius. Predictions and more details to be posted later this week as I gather evidence and write my article.

Anybody looking to make a donation today!? To a good cause: getting a new astrology program software that I can run and get your natal charts faster and easier than anywhere on the Web, and far more accurate and without the privacy invasion? Well then , help me to buy this new galaxy gear I need to do astraunomer like working with the Stars and Moon's in your Sun🔔Signs Charting Birth Chart Analysis included, I will decipher the information for you, your going to love it if we can just make it to the mark of being able to afford it!! $$$ come on guys I know that cafe astrology. Com steals your birth information and uses it right? So does any other site no matter how legit they seem, if your serious about astrology and do not want a hex or curse put on you or a super privacy invasion issue, then DONATE PLEASE TO MY COMPANY I CREATED A BUSINESS PROFILE PORTFOLIO FOR MY ONLINE ASTRO+TAROT-GUIDANCE IT'S THE BEST BEST THING THAT'S EVER HAPPENED, YOU ARE TOTALLY MISSING OUT IF YOU DO NOT FOLLOW ME AND GET READINGS OR REPORTS OF ASTROLOGY as nd numerology daily , weekly, even, monthly, because I have a wealth of great accurate source divine informative details you need to know NOW about your life! You just might be headed in the wrong direction astrologically or maybe your barcodes of your life aren't adding up and we need to subtract? That's numerology! And also my tarot reliable Readings are something you just should not be missing out on ,

I have totally stopped posting the free daily and weekly horoscopes did you notice?

That's because I do not feel like I should be giving out my great divine guidance fir free anymore, I'm feeling used and over worked, also

I only post the daily card of the day for tarot then a few other specials daily, and weekly but everything else I am currently putting on hold until I can at least afford some damn toilet paper. Because I just am not dealing with helping out a bunch of people with their super important questions for free when I do not get help myself for the things I truly need, don't you think my not having fucking toilet paper is a little bit more of an emergency than whether your boyfriend or non boyfriend likes you and you're truly actually meant to be with them, I have to apologize in advance if I seem like I'm being selfish, or rude. Please, I intend to not do any harm by bringing up this fact. Only voicing that I too, have maybe, maybe just maybe, bigger problems than your issues that I think are pure selfish things st this moment in time I'm real sorry that I do feel this way, maybe being broke has made me bitter a tad ... I don't know, cause I used to always go out of my way to assist anybody even if I did not know them, and I'd concentrate on their problems more than mine always focusing on helping others instead of helping myself, now I am purely from the heart, just reaching out for just some compassionate, you do not have to donate much just 3$ or more would get me through the day, 10$ could get me the toilet paper plus my dignity. Today. So if you feel like helping a lost soul out here in the Galaxy.

My paypal account for the company business I just trying to start up now is at this address: www.paypal.com/4tunef8

Hey everyone I just want to say I care deeply about each and every tumblr blogger on here, and I sincerely hope the best for you always, and right now I am doing little candle prayer magik to send you all some healing and luck , and if you do decide to donate, just simply write to my ask box your about you donated and I will be doing a super special ritual tonight (for another reason, personal worship) but I will include your name personally into my piece , and you will truly I swear notice something great happen to you by the time of the New Moon, on the 6th like I wrote at the top of this post

I really actually did not intend for this post to get so long or go on about my personal issue, also I'd like to remind you not to judge a book by its cover, I have huge medical bills and current legal fees that I am trying so very hard to keep up with, this is a really really hard time for me, personally I am not even wanting the morning to come when I go to bed at night. I feel borderline suicidal, if that isn't hard times, I don't know what is... and I'm not even looking for sympathy, or anyone to feel anything towards me except knowing my strength of how far I've come and acknowledgement for this strength that I, an unpredictably unstable mentally ill woman of faith, have come so far from where I used to be and made it through my spiritual awakening which I thought was truly the end of the world it was doomsday dread style scary shit ! But I made it out alive! And now I am a much more magical person because I'm so blessed with my true path of destiney realised again this issue feelings of wehen I was a young teenager, it's like I get to start fresh as new beginning, I actually got a real second chance at life, because if you knew me really knew me, you'd know, that, I had strayed off the great path and was walking along a fine line where I was in constant danger daily. Hourly. I was always in harms way, just on the darkest side of life, depressed and not living for myself at all. I was not trusting my intuition, I was being abused and bullied all the time. And that constant abuse tore holes through my personality and literally metaphorically emotionally ripped me right apart inside and out. I was such a mess I hit rock bottom anxiety struck me harsh but it was good for me in the end because at rock bottom, you have no other choice but to rise up from where you currently are, it's such a true realization, but the main thing is I had gotten better from the abuse, and left finally the abusive relationship and all the other abusive people in my life because as I was going up n up no choice but up, I was gradually actually slipping into my divine timed spiritual awakening which shook my world.

My journey to progression and eventually getting back onto my rightful birth path, my destiny too, this all started my spiritual awakening and shifts in consciousness, I was truly blessed to be cursed at this time. It all started when I went to the homeless shelter in april 2018, just before my birthday it's like surreal how it was all so planned out like this, it's crazy, if you guys only knew the whole entire story of what I have gone through and the truly horrific events that I now realised were all tests, and lessons, and that's my favorite way to look at my very abusive past and the unfortunate circumstances that wound me up a homeless addict on the streets of cities I dwelled in for times that seemed so rough and brutal I thought the pain would never end. Addiction can happen to anybody. But this is something that I actually feel in my soul that I was supposed to, meant to, go through. To realize some things, I had to experience this hard lifestyle. For me to eventually get to a place of gratitude and humility and to actually drop all my selfish ways and have more compassion, and learn that I am meant to have these traits because I am a great healer. In my community I live in currently, a lot of them know my past but do not judge me one bit, they all truly appreciate my free community services that I provide for those in need, they are all suffering from mental health issues and I am treating them (not so much their mental condition but other problems they have at home or with their body) . I am really good at working with herbs, spices, and essential oils. I make and invent cures to almost anything! And I have a biig book of herbal remedies that I, myself , have invented or have found online and then tweaked the recipe to bed much better!! This is volume. 001.2 of my Book Of Shadows. I have written so very many books about magik and the laws of the universe. I cherish my sacred personal theories and extensive wealth of knowledge I have collected. I'm just good at organizing this shit for some reason. If I wasn't so private of a person and afraid of people stealing my information without my consent then I would gladly post more of this type of stuff then I already have,in this blog and my other one which is personally a better one.

Anyways, now you know where I stand, where I come from a little bit.

I really really hope that somebody will take the time to donate to me this day so that I may be I can feel better and like somebody actually cares. I have over spent to the max on credit cards with online shopping, and shipping all kinda of witchy trinkets and necessities, the basics, I am stuck with a huge credit card bill, and I have my boyfriends credit card that I did not know until yesterday, but, he put everything to be on me. He totally used my Health Card and SIN # TO GET WHATEVER HE WANTED BUYING SHUT ONLINE AND SHIPPING TECH STUFF TO HIS FRIEND! I feel like I got scammed and I'm damned or something !! Not only am going to be suffering from PTSD and anxiety around men forever, because of this selfish Identity use basically total FRAUD, I AM NOW stuck in a bad position and with a bill and now the worst part is that I am actually facing federal prison because of some of the activity he did while assuming my identity ?.. thanks ?

I feel very very stupid, I feel like a total idiot for listening to my ex-commonlaw boyfriend, I'm glad I just decided to give him literally all of the furniture and all the shit we owned. It makes me feel less guilty about all the negative emotions I have towards him. I know it does not make it right but it does help believe it or not, because J eventually end up thinking about it as a positive .

If you have at least got this far through this rambling write up post , then congratulations, sincerely- thankyou for listening !

You are amazing

You have a purpose

Find your destiny

☆you're made of star stuff, you're a star!

You are perfectly imperfect

Your magic is valid

No matter who you are or how experienced you are in Pagan Tradition /Wicca and Witchcraft/The Occult or any related subjects and interests in lifestyle choices, your magic is valid! It doesn't matter if you JUST decided to become a witch TODAY or 5 minutes ago, that title is yours to hold onto and have forever or for as long as you decide!

Everybody is special!

Everyone is worth it!

Nobody deserves to be bullied or told they are wrong for what they believe in, simply , everyone's path is unique and it's just not four to critic anybody for the path they are choosing! There's a lot of confused witchlings baby witches and some bullying religious type overgrown babies out there. I think everyone should just have a little more like a lot more respect , because it can be intimidating to anybody who wants to share their opinions that they might feel are good ideas but are second guessing the post they want to make based on fear around the way some communities are reacting and trying to police these people's opinions. As far as I know this blog site was actually created to actually share your opinions without judgement and harsh exchange of words based on the content context. I can relate to this oppression. I feel as if not only does it sometimes the fear of rejection stop me from posting but also I have a big fear of being hated on for a lengthy and slightly random post I write it then I delete it right away. It's just that I actually have severe symptoms of A.D.D that my doctor is not currently helping me to treat, so I can get a bit off track sometimes, and my subjects vary like for example in my main post it starts as a simple astro galactic observations post, my starting of this post I just realize was about the New Moon . Then I started talking about my software that I cannot afford and then i went on to talk about my emergency thats actually bothering me even more , the fact that i cannot wipe my ass today and i do not live near any restursnts or anywhrr literally that has toilet paper availible in their washroom or else id just go to McDonalds and use theur washroom, simple as that...but not availible sorry, and now that im still rambling ans have your attention i have an offer actually for some people that do donate, I'd like people to donate towards so that I can provide a few lucky people with

Free Natal Astral Chart plus some informative explanations about your planetary alignments with accurate predictions to your life. I could eventually provide a much more accurate source of information in my reports than I do with this program I'm running off my laptop as of right now, but currently if you'd like a real actual Astrologer like produced Natal Chart , I am calling everyone to donate to this account here www.paypal.com/4tunef8 and let me know in my ask box that you have donated to my space cosmos exploration programming software .

This is getting way too long I know, but if you really did actually read some of this message at least the good parts, then please share my link to my paypal in your blog with a short excerpt on why they should donate to me , my cause, my business (just started) , and also donate to the astraunomer cosmos Explorer Division Technology that I am so very excited about but I know I have way bigger problem,than, that, but I just wanted to give you guys an idea if what I can do for you. We can make a trade? Please!? To dedicate my time and efforts to assisting every one with their issues gives me great joy, I just love to be useful, and a helping healing hand to any literally anybody , and so ooo much of my days are spent spending my hard earned money on others . To make them that herbal remedy for their skin they truly need because every skincare product on the market is littered with toxic shit that causes bad reactions and the treatments for acne I make that I've invented do not infect or irritate the skin, so they need me, and they cannot afford this 290$ treatment but I actually spend MY money each month just to get the satisfaction of doing the right thing as nd also satisfaction that my products produce results that are beyond what I ever expected of them, sometimes I need a confidence booster and this once a month or twice sometimes, spending I do to make and create this great acne treatment that's herbal and more of a holistic approach.

My greatest flaw right now is not my addiction or the abuse I'm going through anymore, I don't live on the streets (yet) have a pretty decent apartment but my greatest flaw is helping people if that can even be a flaw? It is though, I have so many many more examples of times during the month that I am called up "hey witch doctor, we got a problem, are you free?"

I am on paranormal investigating teams in surrounding communities as well, this takes out so much energy, time, and yes, you guessed it, money !!

Anyways again I am actually going to close this rant ramble weird thoughts flowing from my mentally ill mind.

I truly truly hope that somebody, just 1 person even, does decide to care enough about me , a poor lost soul, to donate some about, it's all up to you, I'm not putting any rules and I just am not one to tell people what to do or how to spend their hard earned dollars or anything like I do not push ideas onto people, I'm just not like that, I totally believe in freedom for all, I don't wish for world peace at night because I know that that isn't possible, there's some cultures that just do not mix and a lot of cultures prefer to stick to their own and that's great because how else would the culture survive and the traditions live on to the next generations if they were mixed with a bunch of other cultures and lost their true identities as a nation , that would be sort of sad in a way, but I'm really not properly medicated and should not even maybe be observational posting about this when in not well in the mind fully yet this day. But a donation will help me to wipe my ass and that's my main goal.

Kk,baiii, don't hate, just donate #freefaeona #donation #astrology #worldwide #tarotreading

Ps: Actually ANYBODY that donates me more than 10$ today and the rest of the week too, I have an offer, I will do a FREE TAROT READING OF 3 FREE QUESTIONS FOR YOU, BECAUSE I APPRECIATE YOU SO MUCH!!

And anybody that shares my link to my paypal explaining that I'm giving free tarot Readings to anyone that's gunna donate! I will give you a YEARS HOROSCOPE OUTLOOK, BASED ON MY VERY ACCURATE SOURCES OF GENERATED HOROSCOPES I RECIEVE THEY'RE THE SAME ONES I USED TO POST ON HERE SO YOU KNOW THEY'RE GUNNA BE GOOD, THEN

Anybody that donates and says it's towards my astro-cosmos software, I'll do up a FREE ABSOLUTELY, JUST THE COST OF YOUR DONATION, I'LL DO YOUR NATAL BIRTH CHART FOR YOU, WITH THE SEMIPRO PROGRAM I HAVE RIGHT NOW,

So there's my offers and anybody that blogs about these offers and tags me in them, is just an amazing person and gets the luckiest prize of all, they get entered into a draw to win a free natal chart birth chart wow yeah and and and I'm gunna give an astrology reading to you very reliable accurate information details you will WANT TO KNOW!!

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