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oddlittlestories · 6 months

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hiii question! i’ve been looking for some kutner lives!au’s that deal with the repercussions of kutner trying to kill himself but surviving the attempt, but i’m finding them pretty hard to find. do you have any recs/ ideas about how i could better search for fics that fit this niche?

Hi!! First off I am so glad I am now the Kutner mutual, goal achieved

Secondly, I have the gone through the first 5/20 pages of fics tagged with Kutner (don't worry, not just for this ask) and have come up with only "you are spring" by emptylakes, which you have probably already seen. I will continue to dig through, and let you know if I have any better advice in the future.

On the whole though—I think you're right. Kutner Lives, Kutner!Lives, and Lawrence Kutner Lives do not seem to yield anything specific, unfortunately. We may just need to propose this to fandom as a group?

#kind of a bummer tbh #but it was a good time digging through fics #been on my to-do list for a minute #asks #asks answered #lawrence kutner #suicide attempt #suicide reference #lawrence kutner lives #kutner lives #kutner!lives #dr kutner #fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic recs

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bittersweetstargazer · 4 months

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you'll never believe how long it took me to make this

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thutner · 2 months

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thinking about how in 5x01 when house told the team that thirteen was tested positive for huntington's and her "life span's been cut in half" and after that revelation the camera pans from thirteen to kutner ...... his reaction ..... OH IM SO ILL IM SO ILL ABOUT THEM ........... IT'S THE WAY CAMERA MOVED FROM THIRTEEN TO KUTNER ..... IM NEVER MOVING ON FROM THIS

#house md #house md gifs #remy hadley #thirteen #thirteen gifs #lawrence kutner #kutner #kutner gifs #kal penn #kal penn gifs #olivia wilde #olivia wilde gifs #thutner #thutner gifs #never living down the thutner agenda actually #ALSO #IM VERY ILL ABOUT THEM #the amount of love that i hold for thirteen and kutner IS INSANELY IMMEASURABLE #i can never be normal about them EVER

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hilsonisms · 5 months

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“i’d say he’s mimicking whichever one of us happens to be dying” -kutner. with him and amber in the room. im psychotic

#house md #lawrence kutner #amber volakis #hilsonisms live blogs #4x5

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greghatecrimes · 9 months

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RIP Kutner, you would have loved the ikea Blahaj

#get him a giant stuffed shark PLEASE he’d display it so proudly as like. a decoration on the mantle in his living room #i love you kutner #i love ikea. i love me a bargain #headcanons #lawrence kutner

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saucerfulofsins · 1 month

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I'm rewatching House because of the House renaissance on tumblr but also bec it was my fav show before I had The Accident 9 yrs ago...

And I'm actually so impressed at still feeling quite similar to the way I did then? Because it's not a perfect show, and certainly none of the characters in it are... But it's such incredibly compelling storytelling, and fascinating characterisation, and I love how much those aspects factor into every single episode... And how much the so called filler episodes actually factor affirm that.

I like how shit every single character is. Fallible, if you will. And I like how the seasons have space for funny things, and weird things, breathers for the spectators and the characters (and not always at the same time).

I just. I feel like the focus is so much on tight plots and brilliant stories to lure in viewers that all of that is gone? There's no... Space for silliness. Or weirdness. Or actually things that DON'T quite work.

And simultaneously, I think House is still a masterclass in character driven storytelling (in which the illnesses are a character too!). Certainly until idk Broken (s6).

Yeah the show plays into stereotypes! Sometimes in bad and/or gross and/or damaging ways! But it subverts them too! And the message is never, ever, to assume that the stereotype is the whole truth. Or that some people are impervious to it. I'm also not saying the way I watch the show is the way everyone does but idk I like the way it makes me think abt things. And I like how it STILL does that now and the only thing that's felt a bit dated so far is house's Gameboy... Maybe. He WOULD still use his gameboy anno 2024!

#House #Just #The whole everyone fucks up!#The everyone lies!#And also the everyone deserves to live #Then of course house subverting that (kind of)#Also Broken is excellent and one of my fav eps in any series ever #And that time house had taub and kutner? Maybe? Autopsy someone who was alive is probably not pc but #So memorable

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farragoofwires · 2 months

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don' dweeblog

#the one mass fanon I do NOT buy is how the malpractice dept is found family. #have you. SEEN this show?????

i have seen this show and i can say without a doubt that the malpractice department is definitely found family. because i know what their families are like.

#house: that.#foreman: self-disinherits because he loses religion and his mom gets dementia. takes medical power from his father to give it to a colleagu #he just stabbed and said isn't his friend.#chase: so mad at his dad for leaving his alcoholic mother that he moved from australia to the malpractice dept.#cameron: who knows what the family who raised her is like except that they did apparently think it was fine for her to marry a terminal can #...cancer dude she'd just met. and also chase. and then she apparently immediately remarried because she has a decently aged kid w/in 2 yrs #thirteen: oh baby. she's got a brother she killed; a sister she doesn't talk to; a dead mom; and a father who we literally cannot know abou #taub: lol #kutner: MY BABY DARLING GONE TOO SOON!!!!! i'm giving him a pass because i love him.#amber: honorary because she got so far in the competition and then dated wilson. who then inherited all her shit and apartment.#relatedly: wilson: honorary because he clocks in so many hours for them. anyway. lol.#park: a NEURO RESIDENT and LIVES WITH HER PARENTS. hashtag girl. hashtag did you even apply to any med schools not w/in driving distance.#whatshername: way too traumatized by growing up rich. like get over yourself.#and last but not least honorary: cuddy: THAT!!!!!!#everyone is ABSOLUTELY found family. not my fault you assumed found family is a good thing.#f: house #m: house

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mhaccunoval · 2 years

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yeah. i’m having emotions about the kutner as head of diagnostics post.

#pant rambles #because it's like. well for one i'm still GUMP they killed him off. yeah someone suicidal doesn't have to show signs prior but like.#it felt Out Of Character. and like!!! house actually cared for him and managed to pull out his intellect #sure. kutner could occasionally be reckless. more often naïve but like. he was still super smart and quick to adjust his mistakes.#and he REALLY loved his job and could actually tolerate being under house's wing #and op is right that he'd have given chase a run for his money; nothing against diagnostics head chase.#it's just [vaguely gestures at kutner emotions]#plus i feel like if he had lived and ever found out house faked his death he'd think it was a bitchin' move #particularly because it was faking his death to give Wilson more time with him and. obviously. kutner knew how they loved each other #AND i think he'd just have fun if he had had the chance to be in house's position. be like him but. Kutner Spiced.#GOD. imagine if kutner had met park... dream team honestly...#(<- needs to stop being insane)

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starlightseraph · 4 months

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house md will always be remebered as the most insane thing ever broadcast because of how unabashedly feral everyone involved was.

a short collection of things that happen on the show, just off the top of my head, not even scratching the surface:

- house shoots a random dead body in the morgue and then sticks him in an mri machine, which pulls the bullet out of the dead guy’s head and destroys the machine, costing the hospital millions

- foreman gets bitten by a person with rabies

- chase kills an african dictator

- cameron steals drugs from a patient after possibly getting hiv from said patient

- house induces a migraine and then takes a drug made by his arch nemesis (who he’s been stalking for 25 years) to get the drug taken off the market. he then takes lsd (in the hospital, in the middle of a case) to cure the migraine.

- chase goes into anaphylaxis after doing body shots

- house stops an elevator so he can perform a cavity (vaginal) search on a teenage heart transplant patient who’s in cardiorespiratory arrest

- they give a neurosurgeon mushrooms to cure his food poisoning, then they stick him in an operating room. the neurosurgeon strips in front of a health board assessor.

- kutner dies for gay marriage

- house sets an autopsy room on fire while trying to juggle flaming bottles

- house gets recruited by the cia

- taub gets held at gun point after diagnosing a stripper with skin cancer

- in almost every single episode, the team breaks into multiple houses

- house fakes terminal brain cancer so he can get drugs implanted directly into the pleasure centre of his brain

- house cons us immigration to get his fake wife a green card. he also uses his fake wife’s ukrainian food truck to spy on people

- house tries to get wilson, his closet case boybestfriend, into bed every few episodes. every other sentence out of house’s mouth is about wanting to rail wilson.

- taub has a kid with his ex-wife, after they divorce, at the same time he has a kid with his 25 yo side piece. the kids’ names are sophie and sophia.

- house and wilson have a bet on who can hide a chicken in the hospital the longest without anyone finding out

- house tries to kill himself like 6 times and always fails (insulin shock, overdoses, electrocution, jumping off a building, cutting, etc)

- house fakes his death to get out of a prison sentence after violating his parole so he can live out his bi love story with his gay best friend who has 5 months to live

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babygirlhouse · 2 months

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house md 2024 headcanons 🫡

hi loves!! jumping on this trend :^) i don't think any of these make sense but they made me laugh soooo here u go

House has a very bad pain day and (when pushed) says that he strained the muscle while riding his bike. Obviously nobody believes him, so the ducklings + Wilson spend the day trying to figure out what he did and end up finding security footage of him attempting to hit the griddy in the morgue

Kutner has a very generic inspirational quotes tumblr blog (he’s so proud of it) and House finds it and just starts dropping quotes from it in DDXs to mess with him & then acting all innocent

Thirteen has a secret thirst trap tiktok acc that doesn’t explicitly show her face but has her lab coat & maybe stethoscope. When Chase suggests that it’s her she doesn’t confirm or deny it and just keeps winking. Cameron definitely follows the account after this. Thirteen pretends not to realise.

Wilson takes a uquiz to find out what sort of cheese he is and is devastated when it says he’s cheddar. He then has an identity crisis because he thinks he’s too bland and tries to reinvent his aesthetic, leading to one infected eyebrow piercing and a tramp stamp that’s never mentioned again. Potential there for a sappy scene where House tells him he's anything but bland.

Cuddy starts a momblog style podcast. House sends anonymous hate. Taub guest stars.

I think Taub would get deeply into ASMR. Like it’d start with him finding and playing a video of ASMR triggers for his daughters, then he tries it himself to see if that calms them down even more, etc etc. He starts a youtube channel and it blows up. He gets recognised by patients at the hospital. It goes to his head just a little. He unironically uses the term 'ASMRtist'

A cosplayer has a mysterious illness and the team has to go to a convention to test for environmental factors. Chase is apprehensive but House forces him to go. He’s quickly recognised at the convention and it turns out that he has a cosplay instagram account and they get stopped every 10 mins to take pictures. No one lets him live it down

Thirteen and Cameron kiss & fall in love & babysit Taub's kids. House makes relentless jokes but is quietly very fond of them and their relationship. Pls i need this

Foreman has a twitter/X account where he posts a combination of work out tips/inspirational quotes (not as sweet as Kutner's blog, more grindset vibes yknow) but he gets mixed up in a pyramid scheme for protein powders and gets cancelled. Also potential for a sappy scene here where Foreman says he admires Kutner for not letting House's teasing about his blog get to him. They're besties now and make each other better.

Cuddy forces all of them to go on a wellness retreat. House and Wilson make a bet to see who can go the longest without speaking. It's not even a silent retreat, they're just like that. Also someone convinces Chase that the utility shed on the retreat is haunted.

The wellness retreat no speaking bet also def has potential for gay chicken. Like Wilson kisses House to see if that will get him to lose the bet. By the next morning neither of them know or care who lost the bet, they leave their room looking Extremely disheveled and return to the hospital very much together. Cuddy is not at all surprised. She planned this. Each of the ducklings hand her $100.

PPTH minecraft server. yeah

#im so tired #i have an assessment due in 6 days #time to speed read all of inferno #house md #gregory house #headcanon #hatecrimes md #house md headcanons #hilson #mouse bites #james wilson

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housethemd · 2 months

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My headcanons for a 2024(ish) House MD (self indulgent sorrysorry)

- House is canonically bisexual, and instead of hookers (or maybe as well as) he’s very open about his Tinder/Grindr hookups.

- Wilson is still a closet case, somehow. All his friends are queer, he is very active as an ally, but has somehow not figured it out. He even has little pride flags in his office pencil holder.

- Cuddy is a lesbian, she and House still flirt for funsies (worth noting I think her and House still had a one night stand in college before she came out, prompting a running joke that sex with House turned her into a lesbian)

- Chase goes viral on twitter (X) when he starts live tweeting House’s antics during DDx’s (his handle is @thataussiedoc and all his DDx tweets are tagged #mycrazyboss)

- The ducklings make tiktok videos when they don’t have a case. The first time House catches them they are expecting him to call them idiots or throw them out of the DDx room, but instead he joins them. Cue House doing a hilarious tiktok dance.

- Non-binary Thirteen my beloved

- Foreman plays Pokemon Go

- House gets a Nintendo Switch for his office so he can game in there, and when forced to go do clinic duty switches to handheld mode

- House and Kutner will game together when they don’t have a case

- There is a PPTH Diagnostics Dept. Discord server

- Foreman hates Apple products

- Cameron has one of those rainbow pins that says “you’re safe with me” she wears on her white coat

- House learns Gen Z slang and spends an entire episode talking exclusively in it - and everyone else is left trying to piece together what he’s saying

- House is canonically autistic but it only comes out during “Lines in the Sand” or similarly themed episode. I feel like either Chase or Foreman get snippy during the DDx and makes a muttered, offhand comment about House, something to the effect of “yeah well maybe you have autism too” and House is like “well duh.” They spend the rest of the episode approaching the other ducklings, Wilson, etc about how they feel, now that they know that House has autism only to be met with general indifference. Maybe it ends when they go to Cuddy and she reminds them what a great doctor House is and all that and eventually they are forced to confront their own internalized ableism.

- PPTH definitely has a float in the pride parade every year

- Chase plays Among Us

- Lesbian Cameron but also CompHet. Like the first couple seasons she hasn’t figured it out yet.

- Hilson is absolutely made canon at some point

I told you they were self indulgent. Might reblog to add more as I think of them!

#house md #james wilson #hate crimes md #greg house #hilson #dr house #dr wilson #wilson x house #gregory house #house/wilson #autistic greg house #non binary thirteen #house md headcanons

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atomicradiogirl · 3 months

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i find it a very interesting choice that house md ends on enjoy yourself rather than you can’t always get what you want or maybe even the actual lyrical version of teardrop by massive attack.

enjoy yourself is the most optimistic of the songs and i’ve seen people complain that it kind of comes from nowhere and the actual meaning of the song especially considering that post-canon, wilson will die and house is dead figuratively (and will probably die literally with wilson), the song is not only a call to the viewer to live their lives to the fullest but asks house and wilson to enjoy the time they have left as they drive away from us, their stories are fundamentally over.

enjoy yourself is only referenced one other time in the show when hallucination amber sings it to house at a restaurant just before the hallucination finale of season 5. this presentation of enjoy yourself by “ghost” amber, someone who haunts house from his guilt over her death and near destruction of his relationship with wilson as a result is also a callback to her death in the first place. house is so scared by hallucination amber singing this song to him he begs wilson over the phone to pick him up, the exact request that killed amber. the optimistic song about living out your life to the fullest sung by the manifestation of his guilt, someone who died too soon also coupled with kutner dying 3 episodes prior to this, just makes the final use of this song so fascinating. the house writers obviously called back to this moment because it was house’s fear of death and change that made the initial scene scary. meanwhile house accepts wilson’s death and his death in the finale after healing and growing. this is why i think enjoy yourself is the perfect finale song. the house writers are telling us that they accept that their time is up and we should too, even though death is horrible and tragic and scary at the same time, everybody dies.

#house md #deep in my thoughts again #the brain worms aren’t leaving me alone #enjoy yourself #amber volakis #gregory house #james wilson #everybody dies #house md season 5 #house md season 8 #parallels my beloved #yay song analysis #hilson #lawrence kutner

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fox-mulder-gets-pegged · 11 months

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Been spending my time lately thinking of a House MD au where, through a series of accidents and lies and a bet he didn't rly intend to win, House ends up as a registered foster parent (he's still addicted to Vicodin and his normal dickish workaholic self but for some reason he cleared the requirements and trust me he's as stunned and mildly concerned as everyone else is).

Through further Shenanigans™, he ends up accidentally getting handed fostership of not one, not two, but three hellish but brilliant kids:

1. This total smartass 16 year old named Robert Chase who yeah he's a bitchy teenaged boy and a former rich kid and Australian with enough mommy and daddy issues to reawaken Freud after his dad dipped and absconded all parental rights and his mom drank herself to death, but he's also got a nice car left over from his rich kid days and an eye for detail and weirdly enough his best friend/mortal enemy (some other teen named Eric Foreman) and his on again off again girlfriend (Allison Cameron, totally won't last if u ask House) both work at the hospital as a candy striper and after school in the cafeteria respectively so House can get all the inside gossip from Chase. Plus Chase has no problems breaking and entering into patient's homes which helps bc since he's not employed by the hospital Cuddy can't complain as far as House is concerned.

2. A 14 year old girl who only answers to Thirteen (House knows he could look her name up in her file but honestly it drives Chase nuts that she won't tell him her real name and that's good enough for him) and who's dad was declared unfit after the death of his wife to Huntington's devastated him. She's a total nightmare, snarky and quick witted and freakishly smart even tho she puts most of those smarts towards things like shaving Chase's entire head (eyebrows included) bc he's trying to grow a sucky teenage mustache, and trying to take House's wallet bc she keeps calling him Old Man and he informed her he's actually only 25 but the stress of fostering has aged him prematurely and she's like 95% sure that's a lie but she wants to check his license and make sure bc everyone lies. She loves tormenting Chase by telling him his best friend and/or his girlfriend is hot and asking if they're single.

And 3. This 6 year old boy named Lawrence Kutner who's weirdly cheerful considering his parents got killed in front of him. He's way too chatty and excellent at puzzles and the only morning person in the entire house and therefore frequently tries to make breakfast (he likes to be helpful and he hasn't burned the place down yet so House doesn't feel the need to stop him). Once he told House he was gonna build a Death Star in the living room and House said lol sure go ahead whatever, only to return home from work to discover Kutner called himself out from school and has a huge wooden frame made of broken furniture in the living room. House rly can't argue since he did say go ahead. Benefits of fostering a 6 year old are 1. The babes love it, 2. Free excuse to leave work early/come in late/not show up at all, and 3. Justification for buying juice boxes and Ritz crackers. The neighbor kid Taub is his go to babysitter bc his mom volunteered him forcibly and Taub is lowkey praying that babysitting Kutner could lead to an in at Princeton Plainsboro once he graduates high-school and finishes medical school (it won't, House doesn't believe in nepotism unless it benefits him).

The adventures of House and his Foster Ducklings mostly revolve around being a Found Family, but do involve frequent plots such as:

House fired his brand new fellows again (he tosses em every three or so months, he hasn't found The Right Team yet) and will sometimes bring his foster kids in, hand em doctors coats, and tell patients that they're just a bunch of medical savants here to consult yes even the 6 year old he's actually Harvard's youngest graduate ever.

House sends the kids to break into a patient's home. They refuse. House tells them the first one to find black mold or lead paint or a dead animal or whatever gets $20. They agree. Chase drops Thirteen and Kutner off at a bus stop across town and drives over himself so he can get an hour and a half head start (ultimate fuck them kids moment, however Thirteen did steal his wallet so guess who's paying for lunch and their taxi ride to the patient's house? Net loss.)

Cuddy demands House does his clinic hours. House sends his foster kids to do his clinic hours for him. Tfw you go to the free walk in clinic for a sore throat and a cough and your doctor is a 6 year old boy who keeps asking for help with spelling whilst filling out your chart.

Wilson babysits them one (1) time since House doesn't trust Chase not to throw a party or sell his foster siblings on eBay if left as the one in charge. He wakes up with a big strip of hair poorly bleached right down the middle. Chase crushed up stolen sleeping pills and mixed them into a juice box, which Kutner 'innocently' offered to Wilson. Thirteen was going to bleach and dye his whole head blue (for practice, she wants to dye her hair but she's certainly not gonna fuck up her own hair until she has the method down) but Wilson woke up pretty quickly due to years of House drugging him. Wilson has not offered to babysit again.

Anyways this is my House Foster Ducklings au which I'm thinking about actually writing. Thank u 🫡

#house md #greg house #robert chase #remy hadley #lawrence kutner #i just think Chase and Thirteen and Kutner are the most House's Actual Kids out of all the fellows #give that man three incredibly smart self reliant kids with issues™#i do imagine a plot where House does overdose of vicodin #and the kids find him #and they're in the hospital #and House has to contend with the fact that he either has to give the kids up to better homes #or make smarter choices bc it's unfair of him to be overdosing and almost dying when he has three traumatized kids relying on him #love when there's some middle aged guy whos like 'no im not a dad' but has a gaggle of kids following him around #feel free to message me about this au

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thutner · 2 months

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remy “ thirteen ” hadley & lawrence kutner in 4x02: THE RIGHT STUFF.

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blissfali · 1 month

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fuck you House MD 2024 headcanons

House's phone is an iphone 4 that consistently crashes and barely holds a charge. he still has flappy bird

Cameron has a Tiktok page where she posts general medical advice and memes

Every episode Chase walks in with a new Tindr/Grindr match. whichever one he's feeling for the day

Foreman used to be semipopular on vine. House will sometimes quote his old posts to fuck with him

Rachel is a Bluey kid i dont take criticism

The diagnostics department has an official Minecraft server ran by Kutner. Wilson builds a really cool home that House decimates with creative mode. they waste half an episode trying to figure out who did it

Whenever House is forced to dress nice (i.e. wear his doctor coat) he will wear copious amounts of gay pride buttons

Thirteen vapes

Thirteen is into the DSMP. shut up

Kutner is a soundcloud rapper

House makes an anonymous Tiktok page where he opposes every single piece of advice Cameron posts to her account even if its right

diagnostics department has a live twitter update account ran by either Adams or Kutner. havent decided

Park's only form of social media is Instagram and Facebook

Kutner, Thirteen, and Cameron use tumblr. House makes an anonymous Tumblr purely to send them all anon hate

Cuddy has to place a block on various porn sites while on the PPTH wi-fi purely because of you know who

Wilson downloads Grindr and then gets scared so he removes any traces of it from his phone

House wears light up Sketchers

#house md #more to come. maybe

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greghatecrimes · 4 months

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Visual: Kutner bringing a cuddly toy to work (a Pikachu, other Pokemon, just a good ol' animal plush, whatev) and when House has his epiphany in the office with everyone around this time, the camera cuts to Kutner in his chair making his plushie's paws clap in celebration

THIS IS SO CUTE. I'm imagining a whole scenario for it now. Kutner brings it in because their patient of the week is a kid who loves pokemon, and they bond over it and it gets the kid to trust Kutner. Thus they can do what they need to do to figure out what's wrong and diagnose him. Then it starts living on one of the bookshelves in the outer office for "moral support" during cases.

Kutner fidgets with it during ddxes. Sometimes Thirteen will take it off the shelf and have it on the table in front of her or in her lap during a ddx so she can stim by petting the soft fabric. Sometimes it sits in Foreman's lap because Kutner thought it would look hilarious, and Foreman just lets it sit there every time, absolutely nonplussed. Sometimes he strokes it like you'd pet a cat sitting in your lap. Taub just goes along with all of it. And most hilariously of all, when House's giant tennis ball is in his office with the door shut, he reaches out and plucks the pokemon away from whoever's holding it and starts tossing it back and forth between his hands, and then throws it back when it's helped enough to give him at least one new idea/theory.

Also, House probably tosses it back and forth between himself and the ducklings like a "you can only talk if you're holding the pokemon, no stupid ideas allowed" at least once during a ddx. And if he's holding the pokemon when someone comes into the office (Wilson, Chase, Cuddy, Cameron) it 100% gets chucked at their head with a sheepish little "oops"

#ask #anon #pokemon #adhd lawrence kutner #autistic thirteen #autistic greg house #remy thirteen hadley #lawrence kutner #greg house #eric foreman #james wilson #lisa cuddy #allison cameron #robert chase #headcanons #chris taub

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