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#ive been working here less than 2 months
shleemies · 24 days
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Got promoted at work today! I knew they had their eyes on me for a promotion but the circumstances were kind of unfortunate. My coworker with the position found out that the raise was less than she thought, and that's after they screwed up her payroll big-time last week and only paid her for 2 days. So she's transferring back to our old store as an associate bc it's closer to her house and honestly an easier store to work at. So my manager came up to me right after they talked and was like you're getting promoted btw I was like oh okay 👍. And to be fair the raise is kinda shit lol it's 30¢. But to my knowledge it's more or less the work I'm doing anyways. I've never gotten a promotion or a raise before so I'm pretty happy about that. I've only had shitty bosses promise me raises for months and never follow through. And I know they've been wanting to promote me already bc all the higher ups I've worked with really like me and recognize that I work hard. I had a coworker 2 days ago ask if I was a manager because she said I had that vibe about me LOL. I was like no I'm just some guy. Still not a manager but I am a shift lead. Still so worried I'm going to burn out but uhhhh I'm doing well at this point 👍
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maburito · 2 months
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Man....I hate having a job.
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orcelito · 6 months
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Feeling some buyers remorse for buying 2 shelves yesterday online. But it's getting eclipsed by the excitement of thinking about where I'm gonna put them and rearranging my apartment a little bit
Is this what it's like to be an adult? Lol
#speculation nation#work sucked today but in brighter moments ive just been buzzing in excitement about furniture#i bought some storage shelves and then a bookshelf#im gonna put the storage shelves at the far side of my living room & put as many of my boxes as i can fit on it#removing Box Island from the center of my living room lol#i wanna also sort thru the boxes to figure out what things would be considered permanent storage (archival things)#which would be priority placed on the storage shelves#and then figure out what boxes i would potentially want to unpack in the coming months. to keep in easier to access locations.#yes ive been living here for 2+ years and yes ive only got like half my shit unpacked. such is life.#for my new bookshelf i wanna do a little more rearranging#the cats' fancy litter box is in the little hallway leading into the bathroom#placed there bc it was the easiest to access outlet for the self cleaning litter box#but it's chunky and gets in the way and with the non clumping litter those things are like fucking legos on the floor#crunch crunch crunch under my slippers. id like the litter box more out of the way.#so im gonna put it in the cat area of the living room. rearranging some stuff over there to make it fit.#and then where it is rn in the hallway. im gonna put my new bookshelf.#i dont know what books im gonna put on it yet. probably my less personal books. probably no manga.#im supposed to get a bookshelf from my dad sometime that's bigger than both my current and my new bookshelf#and im gonna put it in my room. clear the space behind my TV. and Theres where i wanna put out all my manga thats been in storage#idk. shelves!!! potential!!!! its all so exciting.#nothing like new furniture to make me feel like im gonna try to get my life back in order.#and Honestly having the living room suddenly so much cleaner has been... nice.#im gonna work on cleaning my room soon. it is Long overdue.
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bucksbisexual · 2 years
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i fel more and more like an outcast at work every day :/
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toastsnaffler · 12 days
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this assay is so fucking fake......
#same one ive been working on for like 3 months. every other assay ive trained on took me a couple goes to get but ive done this one ~45x#and i keep getting 2 good runs and then 1 fail. which SUCKS bc i need 3 passes in a row to sign off on it#and its so sensitive that changing even tiny things like using a different brand same volume beaker. or a 0.5cm longer flea#anyway i had another 2 good runs this week so this was my 3rd but bc its a friday afternoon im tired as fuck and keep making dumb mistakes#like overstirring it + one of my samples leaked which is soooo embarrassing bc ive already had to ask for more before bc its taken me-#almost 50 fucking attempts already#anyway. hour and a half into prep and im at the most crucial time sensitive part which is pipetting thr enzyme into the substrate#and i manage to do it all w even time spacing (u have to replicate the exact same pace at the end of the timer or it doesnt work)#and then realise id picked up a different identical model pipette that was set to half the volume i was meant to put in FUUUUCK#by that point i was like fuck it im almost 2 hours in and nothing else to do the rest of the day. so ill work around it + see what happens#i figured well its half the volume. so if i add the same half volume again at the 5 minute mark and leave it for 12.5 instead of 10 mins#then itll hydrolyse the substrate to the same degree. IN THEORY in practice this stuff never works bc of error margins etc#bearing in mind this js like 30 seconds of thought bc it took me a couple mins to realise what i did#but the thing abt working in a lab is u make these split second decisions constantly bc everything is so time sensitive#so u have to be quick thinking on ur feet#anyway long story short got to the end of the 3 hour process. which i was carrying out v sloppily bc the chances of it working were-#slim by that point lmao. but lo and behold it was completely fucking fine. all cvs less than 5% and averages <5% of spec#which is awesome bc it means after THREE MONTHS and like. 45x3 whats that AT LEAST 135 HOURS OF FOCUSED TIME ON IT#not counting attempts i gave up on halfway thru bc id alreaady fucked them up bad#i can FINALLY sign off on it lmfao. but im just so mad like why does it play these mind games with me. it shouldnt have worked#whatever chemistry is such a fickle stupid science. anyway wahoo weekend time baby#gorgeous weather here + im gonna get pizza on the way home...... maybe life doesnt suck sometimes 😇#mutuals if ur still at work stay strong soldiers#.diaries
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bunnyhugs77 · 3 months
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Angel Eyes
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𓆩♡𓆪Pairing: Patient! Jungkook x Reader
𓆩♡𓆪WC: 8.2k
𓆩♡𓆪Content Warning: hospital romance, mentions of birth, blizzard, car accidents, smthn abt soulamtes, ft Jin, medical emergencies, making out, jk is a free spirit, tattoos, rehabilitation, they're so cute, cafeteria dates, meet cute, weddings, sexual themes, comas, newborn baby, angsttt :(
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The double doors to the emergency room burst open with a team of paramedics meeting a team of nurses over the limp body that was being rushed in on a gurney.
"26-year-old male. One of many from the four-car pile-up on Highway 400. Blunt head trauma —shattered ribs, compound fractures in both legs. He's unconscious, showing premature signs of decline. We need to get him stabilized immediately."
"Prepare the operation room." One of the nurses orders and the chaos moves around the corner with the gurney.
A team of trauma surgeons and nurses worked frantically to stabilize him. He was quickly assessed for injuries, and diagnostic tests revealed the extent of the damage he had sustained
The man suffered from internal injuries, including a punctured lung and severe abdominal trauma. There was a point when doctors were sure he wouldn't make it but they were wrong.
After undergoing several surgeries in the first few days following the accident, including procedures to repair his fractured bones, remove damaged tissue, and stabilize his internal injuries he was beginning to show small signs of improvement.
However, it was only the beginning of a very long and hard journey for him.
𓆩♡𓆪 2 months later
"Where is she?" You stand up at the sight of your brother-in-law, Jin rushing into the waiting room of the labour and delivery wing. Face flushed and hair a bit frazzled. He'd obviously run here from the parking lot.
"Down the hall to your left. They're just running some tests and checking the baby." He pauses in his steps, letting it all sink in. Placing a hand on his chest as he tried to stabilize his breathing.
Taking the chance to place a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Everything is going to be okay, breathe." You encourage, taking tips from the Lamaze classes your sister had made the three of you take in preparation for this baby.
He smiles before making his way to his wife and out of sight.
Meanwhile, you stayed put in the waiting room as your sister made it very clear she did not want you in the room any time her vagina was out and you weren't going to argue.
Seeing that the doctors needed to check up on the baby once the two of you arrived no less than 15 minutes ago, you had already excused yourself to the hall.
Once you saw the familiar nurse you remember being assigned to your sister walk past you, you deemed it was safe enough to return to her room. Knocking first with your hand over your eyes.
There was soft laughter, "It's been put away, you can open your eyes." Eunji says, allowing you to lower your palm from your gaze to see Seokjin sitting on a chair nestled near Eunji's bedside.
"Wow, they've got you hooked up like a TV." You snort, pointing to the IV drip, pulse oximeter, and various other tubes taped to her arm.
Shaking her head at your typical Y/n-Antics but refusing to acknowledge your joke any further. "What did the nurse say?" Jin asks, almost anxiously, taking her hand in his.
"The baby is fine, she's healthy, but I'm a long way from giving birth. Apparently-" Eunji pauses, her eyes squeezing shut just as they did back at your place when the two of you discovered she'd been having contractions.
Taking deep breaths she opens her eyes and resumes speaking as if it never happened, "Apparently I'm only one centimeter dilated. I'm already tired of this place." She pouts sadly while Jin gently moves a stray hair from out of her face.
You sighed internally, hoping that one day you'd find that.
"I'm just glad you guys made it here safely. The roads are getting worse with that blizzard coming in tonight." Jin shares which prompts you to check your phone while the couple talks about what a normal couple would discuss at a time like this.
Jin was right. There in fact was a blizzard heading your way and it was nasty. Up to six feet of snow in some regions and harsh winds. It was practically impossible to see the road through all the flurries on your way here.
It was unsafe for anyone to be driving at a time like this hence why Eunji had already begged your parents to stay home until the roads were safe. No matter how much she knew your parents wanted to be present for the birth of their first grandchild it was just too dangerous.
This winter was packed with a punch this year. You can't forget the first major storm of the season about two months ago that blindsided everyone.
The severity of the storm dawns on you as you remember driving past a nasty collision on the highway on your way home from work.
You could only hope that this would be the end of the strenuous icy season and that spring would be just around the corner. You were looking forward to the blossoming season of spring but not as much as you were looking forward to holding your niece in your arms in just a few short hours.
𓆩♡𓆪
Clearly, you and your niece weren't on the same page.
It's been 4 hours and the hospital was on lockdown, any visitors in the building were forbidden from leaving due to the severity of the storm outside. Honestly, some part of you believed you would have been able to hold your niece and go home all in the last three hours, but oh how you were wrong.
"What do you mean you're only 3 centimetres along?" You say, exhausted from waiting. "Oh, I'm sorry Y/n, are you tired? How inconsiderate of me!" She exclaims, clearly annoyed with you.
You dropped your shoulders, you deserved that. Eunji had been battling her contractions restlessly for hours on end, you couldn't imagine how she felt.
"Do you want me to get you anything?" She shakes her head while Jin returns with a full cup of ice for her to chew on. Your stomach rumbles, and not quietly.
"You should go down to the cafeteria and get something to eat. I'll stay with Eunji." Jin offers and you nod, deciding it was time for a break anyway.
With your bag slung over your shoulder, you stood in the café line, unsure what to get before deciding to get a typical iced coffee and a turkey sandwich.
Once it came time to find a spot, your eyes were scanning every nook and cranny of the filled cafeteria due to the overwhelming number of people trapped in this building just as you were.
Finally, you found one available spot, at an occupied table. "Is anyone sitting here?" You ask the man who was enjoying his own coffee. "It's all yours," He smiles and you reciprocate it as you take a seat.
Paying him no mind as you bite into your meal and pull out the book you've been reading over the last few weeks.
"The String of Fate," The man across from you mumbles as he reads the title of your book causing your eyes to flicker to his. "What's it about?" You close the book almost too eagerly.
"Do you believe in soulmates?" He blinks at you.
"Y'know, like two people that are destined to be together no matter the time or place." His brow arches. "Not a chance." You frown, "Well, basically this book explains the concept of soulmates and how they're connected by this invisible string between them that will always guide them back to each other. No matter the time or place."
He sighs heavily, head now resting on his hand. "I'm gonna take a shot in the dark here and assume that you believe in soulmates?"
"What's there not to believe? It makes total sense-" You ask, about to take your first bite of your sandwich. "I wouldn't eat that if I were you," He says quickly, and you close your mouth, placing the sandwich back down.
"Why not?" He simply stares at you, "Trust me. I've been here long enough to know." You nod slowly, "You must visit a lot."
With a shrug of his shoulders, he finishes the last of his coffee, "Something like that." He mumbles.
Your stomach reminds you of the hunger you'd just permitted to exist longer all in the name of this handsome stranger you'd just met. "So what can I eat here?"
He grins and your stomach twists.
"Follow me." You pack up your stuff and stand. Unable to process your thoughts once the man moves away from the table in his wheelchair.
"Oh c'mon, don't give me that look." He sighs.
"What look?" You counter, genuinely confused.
"That look of 'oh my gosh, he's in a wheelchair. Now everything is different.'" He says in a slightly raised tone.
"First of all, I didn't think that at all. I was just shocked." He looked almost deflated until you spoke up, "So are we still getting jello or what?" He smiles, leading the way.
-
"Hey! Hey! Mister Lightning McQueen, do you mind slowing down a bit? Or at least tell me your name so I don't have to keep yelling mister." You pant, finally catching up to him at the end of the hall.
"Sorry." He flushes a light pink before a quick clearing of his throat, "I'm Jungkook." He stretches his hand and you shake it gently, "Y/n." You say, the two of you hold hands a little longer than necessary before a visitor attempts to get by and you pull your hand away first.
Fast forward to the two of you sitting on the chairs in god knows which wing of the hospital, the building was so damn big. Licking the spoons of your delicious cherry jello as you were both facing the window that looked out into the midnight sky.
"So what brings you here tonight?" He asks as he scoops around his cup for another spoonful. "My sister is giving birth. At least that's what I thought was supposed to happen but the baby doesn't want to come yet." He laughs, "That's amazing. Not the part about the baby holding your sister's womb hostage but- you know what I'm trying to say."
Unable to control your laughter at his bizarre wording, "Yeah, I get it." A silence falls between the two of you, sitting on your shoulders. You wanted to say something but you weren't sure- "It's okay, Y/n. You can ask." He speaks without even looking at you. Focused on getting his next spoon of jello.
"How did you end up here?" You ask and Jungkook begins the age-old story. He was coming home from work during that crazy storm 2 months ago. He said he didn't remember much from the actual accident, one second he's in his lane and the next there's an eighteen-wheeler sliding right into him and dragging two others in with him.
"I don't even remember being rushed in here, I just remember waking up 3 days later and the doctors telling me I was lucky to be alive. Telling me I had basically injured every bone I had. Head trauma, shattered ribs, a punctured lung, fractured both my legs- and the list goes on."
Your jaw falls open. Hand raising to cover your mouth for two reasons.
"You really are lucky to be alive."
It seems that Jungkook disagrees, "Yet I don't feel all that lucky. I wake up to the same faces, getting poked at and pricked every hour. Going to rehab every other day, my body hurts constantly. I can't even count how many painkillers and antibiotics I take every morning." You frown.
"I'm grateful to be making progress of course, but sometimes It feels like the world is passing me by while I'm standing still-- or sitting, for that matter.." You'd never connected to anything more.
"I totally understand. Under different circumstances of course, but I think I get what you mean. Ever since I was 7 I'd had this perfect vision of how my life should be by the time I was 25. A nice house, with a loving husband and maybe a baby on the way with my six-figure paying job but here I am, 26, sitting in a waiting room, single, waiting for my sister to have a baby so that I can go home to my office job that sure as hell doesn't pay enough for a nice house."
Your story provokes a soft chuckle to come rumbling from Jungkook's chest and you swat at him. "And it's like, you want to take steps forward but it's almost like you can't because everything is out of your control. The most decisive factor of a good life is controlled by everyone but you. It sucks." Jungkook expands on your thoughts further and you'd never felt so seen before.
"I-" You begin but the PA system begins to blare someone's voice as they make an announcement.
"Code Yellow. Code Yellow." Jungkook's vision darts to his wristwatch. "Shit. It's been an hour already?" You weren't following, "What's going on?" Jungkook begins to roll back, tossing away his garbage in the bin while you stand and do the same.
"Code yellow is just their dramatic way of declaring a patient is missing. Although-" His eyes fly past you and to whoever was behind you, it was a furious nurse. "Jeon Jungkook." She says and he groans, "I know- I know."
Jungkook hardly got to speak before he was being pushed away back to wherever his room was. "I hope your sister has a safe delivery." You stand still in the middle of the hall as you watch Jungkook get whisked out of sight.
Unable to stop thinking about how disappointed he looked once that nurse appeared. Clearly, he didn't want to go back. You couldn't shake what he told you, about seeing the same people every day, following the same painful routine.
You wondered if he had any family that visited him.
Speaking of which, it was time for you to return to your own.
𓆩♡𓆪
7 hours later you were finally holding the most perfect baby girl in your arms. "She's beautiful, Eunji," you say tearfully, staring at the adorable infant who was just so tiny in your arms.
"I can't believe I'm holding your baby right now." You say to no one in particular while Seokjin stands behind you looking down at the baby, he looks like he's still in awe himself.
Carefully passing her back into your sister's tired arms. You had the honour of taking their first family photo. With Seokjin's eyes full of love and your sister displaying the happiest smile you'd ever seen.
"She's perfect." You hear him whisper with a kiss to Eunji's forehead and your heart just about melts at the heartwarming sight.
𓆩♡𓆪 7 days later
The moment that you left that hospital that morning you felt almost... sad? Like you had a happiness hangover. You were truly overjoyed, you finally got to meet your niece and you met Jungkook who left an unanticipated imprint on your brain.
You tapped your nails against the desk in your cubicle, your bottom lip tucked between your teeth as your eyes glanced at the time at the bottom of the computer screen.
Your break was in 20 minutes, you had an hour to do whatever and sure, you could spend it here continuing your work so that you could go home earlier...but the hospital is nearby...
No more than a 10-minute drive.. maybe you could drop by? Just for a little?
You didn't leave yourself much time to debate it as you were already marching out of the office the moment the clock hit 12. You'd decided to pick up some flowers from the gift shop on your way up.
Following the receptionist's instructions that she gave you to locate his room with a nervous click of your heels with each step. What if he didn't want to see you? Does he even remember you?
You saw him through the glass window briefly and adjusted yourself to an angle where he couldn't see you. He was just laying there. Staring up at the ceiling, but he sat up once a nurse walked in.
It seemed that she was doing some routine checkups before pricking him with a needle of some kind. You'd always been the type to squirm with needles yet he was unfazed, it was like he couldn't even feel it.
Once she left she passed you with a small smile. Slowly you walk to the door and his gaze slowly drags towards you. His eyes smile before his lips, and he sits up.
"Y/n!" He says with such a joyful tone, you would never expect the voice to belong to someone sitting in a hospital bed. "Hi," You say, unsure of what to do with the flowers.
"Don't tell me you're still waiting for your sister to give birth." He says with a little sarcasm and you laugh with a shake of your head. "No, little miss Seol-a came fashionably late."
"As in 'snow child'? That's a perfect name." You agree. Watching him as his gaze drops to your arms. "Oh- These are for you." Bringing the small bouquet of tiger lilies to him, he accepts it gratefully.
"Thank you-- Really, you didn't have to. You visiting me is more than enough of a gift, and they're Tiger Lilies, too. Fun fact, that's actually my birth flower." It was like a lightbulb had gone off in your head but you ignored it.
Maybe that was just a coincidence, but you didn't like that word. You preferred to use something much stronger, that starts with an 'F', and ends with an 'ate'.
"Pull up a chair, please. I don't want to be the only one sitting." He insists, gesturing to the chair near the wall and you bring it a bit closer.
Letting out a soft sigh of relief once you were off your feet, "God, I hate heels." You mutter, "I'm guessing you have to wear them for that magical job of yours," Your face turns sour, "Magic isn't the word I'd use to describe it,"
Just like that the two of you fell down a rabbit hole of conversation, exchanging work experiences and even phone numbers at one point.
"So tell me, Y/n. In a perfect world, if you could just drop everything, what would you do?" You pretended to give it thought as if you hadn't known for the last decade. "I'd want to open a hair salon... Is that crazy? I don't think I've ever actually said that out loud before."
"What's stopping you?" You laugh, a little too hard, thinking of the dozens of reasons why it wasn't practical and way too impulsive but the longer you looked at his neutral expression you began to reflect on the reasons.
And they all came back to the same root, "What if I fail?" He shrugs, "You can't fail unless you give up." You couldn't believe you were actually considering this. Shaking your head dramatically, clearing your brain.
"You're such a bad influence, y'know? I can't believe you really almost made me do that." His bunny-like smile is on display when he speaks, "That wasn't me, that was your instinct. For a brief second, you just listened to your heart."
Woah.
"Wanna see something cool?" His hand raises and gestures to his lower body, and you watch as the blankets begin to stretch over the small peak that began to form under the covers as he bends his left knee slightly.
"Jungkook! That's incredible." You gasped, eyes wide and you weren't sure what came over you, but before you knew it you'd taken him in your arms.
His body was still a bit weak but his arms responded almost immediately. Holding you still for the short duration of the hug before you pulled away.
"Are you okay- I'm sorry, did I hurt you-" A small panic consumes you as Jungkook's eyes tint a faint red and well with tears. "No, no. You didn't do anything wrong. It's just been so long since someone's been so happy for me."
His words weighed down in your chest like a pile of bricks. "Does no one visit you?"
"All my friends and family came to visit right after the accident. Then it was just my best friends and my parents who came a few times a week. Soon people don't have time to visit someone who makes such little progress every day."
He continues to explain, "But I don't hold it against them. It's a time commitment. The real world is more demanding than I am and I just can't wait for the day I get to meet them out there."
Gently placing your hand on top of his, "You're gonna be out of here before you know it-" A familiar ringer goes off in your bag. You pull out your phone and stop the alarm. "Well, my break ends soon." You stand and you tell yourself that you're imagining the small frown peels over his lips.
Putting the chair back where you found it you walk to the door. "Bye Jungkook, it was good to see you again." With that, you walk away and Jungkook is left in despair. That was it? It's over?
You were just gonna walk into his room and bless him with the most revitalizing conversation he's ever had and you're leaving?
Before he gets the chance to deflate into his pillows your head pops back into the doorframe, "See you tomorrow." You wink and vanish once again. Knowing that you'd given him a little wave of sadness at first.
His shoulders shake with laughter, relieved.
𓆩♡𓆪
Staying true to your word, you in fact did go back to visit him the next day, except you went after your shift since 40 minutes simply wasn't enough time.
For the first few weeks of your daily visits, Jungkook was afraid that one day you would stop coming and he wouldn't see you again, but once three months had passed, there was no doubt in his mind he would walk out of this hospital without you by his side.
You'd even met his parents once, by accident of course. You were just leaving when they'd been walking in and of course, they had no idea who you were.
Telling them about how the two of you met was quite entertaining, Accidentally mentioning the part where Jungkook had been called a missing patient which earned him a soft pinch to his arm from his mother.
But you'll never forget the words his mother whispered in your ear as she hugged you. "Thank you for loving my son." Your cheeks flushed and you stuttered, trying to clarify things but she didn't want to hear it.
"It's okay, I know." She says with the most subtle of winks before walking off with her husband who shook your hand graciously.
Not every day was full of laughs and feasts that you'd bring him from the outside world, there were definitely down days. Days when the pain would call for a stronger dose of his medications which left him burnt out and groggy.
But there were also good days like today. You had the honour of helping Jungkook take some of his first steps for a few feet before being right behind him with the wheelchair.
You weren't able to stop your tears while Jungkook apologized to the physical therapist for your constant crying. You cried every time you saw him move on his own, but he thinks it's cute.
It's evident how much you care about him. By now your entire family knew about your blossomed friendship, and it seems he was all you could talk about. He could only hope that you knew how much he cared about you.
He would love to surprise you at work one day with lunch or take you to your favourite places. Alas, that was among the list of things he unfortunately couldn't control but promised to do once he got out.
He had a section of notes dedicated to you and all the places he would take you, it's what he always hid against his chest anytime you tried peaking.
-
"You won't believe what I just did!" Those are the first words that escape your mouth in the most dramatic of ways as you practically burst into his room.
He jolts, his book now falling forgotten from his fingers, you'd startled him and you apologized. You weren't usually here at noon. So he welcomes your explanation with a warm smile and curious eyes.
"So I went to work this morning, and they called us all in for a meeting. I was expecting another spontaneous workshop about professional behaviour or something. They drop this huge bomb on us that the company is downsizing so they're laying off a third of the company and basically cutting everyone's salary in half." It all comes out in a single breath, so you give yourself some time to breathe.
Jungkook wasn't following, "This sounds like... bad news? Am I missing something? Why do you look so happy?"
"Because I quit my job. I've been thinking about what you said for a while now, about following my heart, and I think I've always been waiting for some kind of sign or opportunity to just go for it, so today was the day." Now that you'd finally gotten the jitters out, you pulled up a chair.
"I know it's crazy, I don't know what I was thinking, but I just got off the phone with one of the property managers of those empty studios downtown and it was all so exciting and I don't even know where I'm going to get the money but I think I can-"
Jungkook finally silenced you with his lips.
He kissed you.
His lips were soft as they worked against yours. You could feel him smile as the kiss deepened. You moved out of your chair to the bed without breaking contact. Pulling away briefly for air but resuming as though you couldn't be apart for more than a second.
You weren't sure when you'd ended up on top of him with Jungkook on his back and your hips grinding down onto his softly, still a bit cautious.
"You have-" He kisses down your neck, peppering kisses between his words, "-No idea-" His lips kissing right below your ear, "-How long I've wanted to kiss you." His teeth gently nibble on the skin of your ear causing a whine to escape your lips.
Suddenly there was a fast beeping and it was only getting faster.
A nurse walks in and you just about throw yourself off of Jungkook and onto the ground. "What's going on in here? Your heart rate was way too fast, Mr. Jeon." He bites his lip nervously while you get yourself on your feet.
"Sorry, Nurse Lynn. I was just trying some new exercises and I guess I got a bit carried away." He says the last part with a lustful look in his eye when he glances towards you.
Once she left you let your hand cover your mouth in pure shock, laughing uncontrollably. "Oh my god, I can't believe that just happened." Jungkook throws his head back onto the pillows with a heavy breath.
"Those nurses can't let me have shit in here. I can't even rub one out in the shower without them barging in." Your jaw drops, "It's happened more times than I'd like to speak about." The shame that seems to swallow him up makes you laugh even harder.
-
"How's the salon going?" He's the first to ask you once you walk out of the bathroom and your shoulders drop. Taking a seat beside him on the bed, "It's a lot harder than I thought it would be. My contractor is being a total pain in the ass, but at least it's starting to come together, look-"
You swipe through the photos of the empty studio that was now painted. "I can't wait to see it." He says, and you look away from the screen. Focusing on his beautiful brown eyes. "Me too." He steals a sweet kiss from you before resuming his swipe through your phone with a cheeky grin.
For the first time, you noticed how empty his left arm was compared to his right. His right arm was covered in tattoos that the two of you had spent nearly an hour talking about once, while his left arm was blank.
"Why don't you have any tattoos on your left arm?" He places down your phone, making eye contact with you once again. "I wanna save it for something special, something meaningful, like the Batman symbol." His nerdy remark makes you snort.
𓆩♡𓆪
"Hi Jungko-Oh." This was unusual.
Of all the times you'd visited Jungkook, there was probably only one other time where you'd caught him sleeping, although that was a late night. It was only sometime around 3 in the afternoon.
You didn't want to disturb him, so you left him a little sticky note for him to read when he wakes up. You didn't want him to think that you never came.
The following day the two of you were having a bit of a hard time getting Jungkook out of bed. "I thought you wanted to do some more walking?" You offer, standing with his walker but he laid back unmotivated.
"Not today, maybe another day. I'm just a bit tired." He mumbles and you nod, "Oh. Okay." But your heart wasn't settled, something was wrong.
The week continued with his slow responses and fatigue. "Are you okay?" He hums, his eyes shutting tight as he grunts softly. "Yeah, just got a bit of a headache, that's all. I'll be better by tomorrow." He reassures you, and you insist on getting him some water.
"Nurse Lynn." You call out for the Nurse as you cross paths as you return from refilling Jungkook's water bottle. She stops and begins to approach you. "Jungkook has been acting a bit off lately. He's been really tired and he says he has a headache and I just want to know if anything is going on."
You can see that she really begins to think about anything it could be. You follow her as she goes off to check his charts. Looking through the window, Jungkook had already fallen asleep.
"His numbers seem to be fine, but we'll keep a close eye on them tonight and run some tests in the morning." Leaving you with a reassuring hand on your shoulder, but you still didn't feel any better.
You went home to your parents' house. You'd moved back home after impulsively quitting your job since there was no way you'd be able to afford your old apartment anymore. Besides, this arrangement made the most sense.
Now you were able to save your money and focus on your salon. The salon Jungkook had inspired you to open, god you couldn't stop thinking about him. Something felt off.
"Y/n?" Your dad snaps his fingers in front of you, finally catching your attention. "Sorry- What?"
"Your mom and I were wondering if you'd be joining us for dinner or if you already ate." You shake your head slowly, "It's okay, I'm not hungry."
"Is everything okay?'' Your stretches her neck from where she sat on the couch. "I don't know. Jungkook's been acting off lately and I just don't know if everything is okay." Anyone who heard you could hear the worry that wavered in your tone. You wanted nothing more than for him to be okay.
"Oh, honey." Your parents hugged you and for a moment you felt like everything was going to be okay.
Until it wasn't.
-
It was around 2 in the morning when you'd gotten a call from Jungkook's mom.
He'd gone into a coma.
You didn't find yourself to be a religious person yet you found yourself praying to any god in the sky who was listening as you drove to the hospital that he would be okay.
Running through the halls, letting out careless apologies to those you nearly bumped into as you did so. "What happened?!" You say frantically, his mother was in no state to speak, her eyes were bloodshot and her lips quivered whenever she tried to speak.
Instead, his father took on the role to tell you, "The doctors said there were unforeseen complications from his accident. There was some inflammation in his brain that went undetected and was applying pressure to his brain stem which is why he was experiencing those headaches and fatigue. They've done all they can to reduce the swelling, but there's no guarantee he'll-"
His dad struggles to finish his sentence, choking up a bit himself at the possibility of Jungkook never waking up. "C-Can I see him?" You swallow back your tears and that sore feeling in your throat as you walk in slowly.
You didn't want to cry, but the moment you saw him hooked up to all those machines, the same ones he hated so much, the way his body lay so still, it broke you.
Your cries came out more as wails than anything else, you couldn't say anything but his name. You weren't just crying, you were begging, pleading with the gods to spare him.
"Y/n-" You hear his dad's voice behind you, catching you in his arms just as you fall to your knees. He could have never anticipated a reaction quite like this one. It seems he underestimated how much Jungkook meant to you.
Now he knows.
All his friends and family knew.
As they trickled in and out of Jungkook's hospital room over the following weeks they would see you sitting by his side, the same way you did all the days before.
His mom liked to say you were there more than Jungkook was. She knew he was lucky, he'd found something special with you. A kind of love that was rare to come across these days.
You spent every waking moment beside him until visiting hours were over, and would be back the next morning the moment they begin. Your parents told you to keep yourself busy with your salon and you tried, but how could you when everything inside reminded you of him?
Today was a quiet day, with no visitors or flowers for you to find space for as his room was filled. You focused on reading to him. You'd been told that hearing familiar voices can help to stimulate brain activity and you were willing to do anything.
"As Batman ran through the dark streets of Gotham-" You chuckled to yourself, unable to take the story seriously.
According to his parents, this was his favourite comic book growing up, and you'd been reading it to him for the last few days, and yet you still weren't interested in DC.
You rummaged through the bag of books you had on the side, your fingertips grasped the familiar cover that started it all. "The String of Fate" You mumble, a soft smile as the title takes you back to the night you met.
Back then he was nothing more than an opinionated patient on the loose, and now, he was everything.
You opened the book, going back to the page you'd bookmarked as a favourite. Deciding to read it out loud for the sake of Jungkook hearing your voice.
"In the garden of destiny, soulmates blossom, each petal a reflection of the other's beauty, each leaf a testament to their shared growth. Together, they tend to the soil of their dreams, nurturing them with the water of their love, as they chase the sunsets of tomorrow, hand in hand, forever intertwined."
Your voice began to shake halfway through, and your tears landed on every other word. You closed the book, placing it back in the bag so that you could take Jungkook's hands in yours.
"Please," You whispered, "I love you."
It was no surprise to anyone. You had nothing but love for the man who changed your world for the better. He had no idea how much space he takes up in your head, your heart. It's his, it belongs to him.
"Can we come in?" There are soft knocks on the door and you're pleasantly surprised to see Jin and your sister, assuming the baby was with your parents.
"Thank you for coming," You hug them both, "If there's someone important enough that you went MIA during my labour, then I have to meet him." Eunji says jokingly and you smile sadly, "I just wish you got to meet under better circumstances."
The days turned to night then day once again, and the pattern continued endlessly for the following month. It just continued to repeat in this painful process of dwindling hope.
Nothing could have prepared you for the devastating conversation with the doctor this morning.
"Please understand, during this difficult time, we have carefully monitored Jungkook's minimal brain activity. Given the duration of his coma and after our intensive examination of his condition, if there were indications for a potential recovery leading to him waking up, we would have observed signs by now. I know this news is incredibly challenging to hear but-"
His mother wept.
"We're so sorry." The doctor says as if it was rehearsed, you couldn't imagine how many times he'd had to give such gut-wrenching news to other families.
You listened with a broken heart, unable to cry. You were all out of tears. You'd cried and cried your heart out all month, you couldn't bear the thought of it all being for such a tragic conclusion.
-
That was almost a week ago, you'd remained by Jungkook's side regardless. Never leaving, not moving.
"Y/n, Honey. You've been here all day, when's the last time you ate something, hm?" His mom gently tilted your chin upwards, you looked pale in colour and your eyes were dull with sorrow.
"I don't know, Tuesday maybe?"
It's Thursday night.
"Go." She orders, and you know that tone. She wasn't willing to negotiate this with you. She'd begun to care for you like a daughter of her own, and as much as she respected and adored your dedication to her son, it was just as important that you were healthy.
Still following Jungkook's advice, you avoided most of the shops in the cafeteria except for a select few that he deemed sanitary. Sitting at one of the tables by yourself, you poked at your food, not all that hungry but you took bites anyway.
Taking a long sip from your water bottle you ignored the buzzing from your phone. You're sure it's just the contractors giving you a hard time again. You were set to open in a few months from now and you'd never felt more grateful for your mom stepping in to help while you were.. away.
Your phone buzzes once more, you finally check the messages.
Ever since that night, every time Mrs. Jeon messaged you, it left you with a pit in your stomach, quite like the one in your stomach right now.
She was calling you back to Jungkook's room immediately.
Completely abandoning your half-eaten meal on the table as you rushed back up to the room you'd begun to know like the back of your hand.
There his parents were, teary-eyed as they sat outside his room, making calls and texting loved ones. Soon you saw a team of nurses walking out of his room with some medical technology that you're sure had very complicated names and--
Oh no.
Your brain was putting the pieces together. What was once a pit had evolved into a full-fledged sinkhole. Your hands were shaking as you walked into the room, eyes landing on his body, not expecting to meet his familiar brown orbs.
They blinked at you slowly. Just like the first time you'd visited, they smiled before his lips did. "There she is," His voice was weak, understandably but it still had that softness to it.
Your body was overwhelmed and unable to make any coherent sounds. You were standing still as a statue. You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth to stop your lips from quivering but you couldn't stop it.
Your breathing became shallow and the sound of your heart drumming in your ears seemed much louder than it did a minute ago. You felt like your eyes were playing tricks on you.
"Is it-" Your voice airy and broken, not wanting this to be a dream. You so desperately needed this to be real. He nods slowly with a grin, "It's me." Just when you thought you had no more tears left, there were more spilling down your cheeks.
Finally picking up your feet and walking over to him with broken sobs, meeting him at the side of the bed. On your knees with his arms around you while you held him in yours. "I thought I lost you." You swat him with teary eyes and a small laugh.
"You can never lose me, Y/n, and I want to make sure of that." He says, and your head tilts instinctively. "What do you mean?"
"Marry me."
Eyes wide and your mouth nearly kissing the floor.
"You can't be serious," Oh how you hoped he was serious.
"You've been by my side every step of the way. When I walk through those hospital doors one last time, I want to be beside the woman I love. Let me spend the rest of my life making you as happy as you've made me." Now he was the one getting misty eyes.
Your mouth struggled to keep up with the eager nodding of your head. "Yes." Holding his face in your hands and kissing him like you'd longed to do for weeks.
Finally.
"Wait- You don't have a ring," Jungkook leans slightly for the box of band-aids on the side table. "Jungkook, I don't need-'' Your efforts go in vain as he shushes you kindly, taping the band-aid around your ring finer.
"It's symbolic for now until I can get you the real thing."
-
Nothing could have prepared you for the busy year ahead of you. Between visiting Jungkook, opening a salon and planning a wedding things were beginning to get chaotic but it all seemed to fade in importance once Jungkook finally got to go home.
And you were right, he was home just in time for Thanksgiving, and he had a lot to be thankful for. He made that clear during his speech at your parents' annual Thanksgiving dinner.
The fact he was able to stand for it was reason enough. Although he wasn't able to walk far distances, he was improving every day, and it just warmed your heart.
Your speech wasn't nearly as tear-jerking as Jungkook's was, but you still had a lot to be grateful for. Just looking around the table from where you stood, smiling at your parents, your sister with Jin and Seol-a, Jungkook's parents, and Jungkook, of course.
Everything you ever wanted was right in front of you.
Keeping your speech short and sweet, "And I know she's grateful for that huge rock on her finger." Eunji whispers loudly causing the table to erupt in a fit of giggles, the tips of your ears turn red as you smile shyly.
From Thanksgiving to the opening day of your Salon. Staring up to look at your name written out in a cursive font across the top of the building you were in awe. "Pinch me," you mutter sarcastically, not expecting Jungkook to actually pinch you.
With a pout you rubbed the pink mark he left on your arm as the two of you walked into the moderately busy salon. Your mom had sent out flyers and emails about the opening day all season.
You wouldn't have been able to do it without her.
"I'm so proud of you," Jungkook whispers and you turn to face him with the look of a puppy. "I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you," He shakes his head, "I didn't do anything. This was all you, all you had to do was listen to your heart." Giving him one of those upside-down smiles you wrap your arms around him, talking into his chest.
"I can't wait to marry you."
Before you knew it, the wait was over.
Today is the day. 
You could only stress about one day so much, you'd gone over every last detail down to the very inch and you were sure it was going to be perfect, after all, you'd had it all planned out in your head since you were 7 and Jungkook was more than happy oblige, 'as long as I get to marry you', he would say.
Your wedding was beautiful, it left your guests breathless the moment they entered the venue and the ceremony hadn't even begun yet.
Your wedding had its own special and heartfelt twist to it. Instead of Jungkook standing ready at the altar, he had the honour of picking a heartfelt song to walk down the aisle to with no arm crutches or wheelchair to support him. Nothing but his parents on either side holding one of his arms.
Some of the audience cheered while some let their tears fall quietly, knowing how far Jungkook had come to get to this point. Once he made it to the front, his best man, Jimin, handed him his arm crutches once again.
Soon the rest of the bridal party had made their way down the aisle, prompting the audience to stand. All heads turned to the grand double doors that soon opened as a romantic instrumental of "Look After You" began to play.
Jungkook could hardly see you from the distance he was standing but just knowing that you were walking towards him had him choking up already.
By the time he really could see you, he couldn't. His eyes are cloudy with tears until Jimin hands him his pocket square to wipe his eyes. Blinking the rest of his tears away, he smiles at you.
You looked beautiful.
Like God's most perfect creation sent down from heaven. There you were, smiling back at him with those angel eyes of yours. It would be a lie to say you didn't want to cry but the last thing you wanted was to ruin your makeup.
However, you weren't so strong when it came time to listen to Jungkook's vows after just finishing yours.
"You once asked me if I believed in soulmates, and I remember saying it was a load of crap. I had no idea they were sitting right in front of me. Your unconditional and unchanging demonstration of love has completely changed me from the inside out. Through you, I breathe again, and for you, my heart beats. Today, I give you more than just my word. I give you mind, I give you my soul, my everything. I pray from this day forward we will chase the sunsets of tomorrow, hand in hand, forever."
The last part he recites from the passage of your book you'd read to him while he was still unconscious. Your makeup is now a victim to the stream of hot, salty tears that flowed from your eyes, "You heard me." You say just loud enough for only him to hear you. He smiles. "I heard you."
With no more tears and the unravelling of a touching ceremony,
"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."
This was it. The moment Jungkook had been anticipating for months. Unclipping himself from the crutches around his arms, he hands them to Jimin.
He stretches out his arms dramatically, pretending to crack his neck.
Carefully taking your face in his hands, knowing how important it was to you that he didn't smudge anything, but your lipstick was going to need some reapplication after the way he pivoted and swooped you down for the most passionate of kisses.
The kind where your leg raises in the air while the photographer gets the money shot, capturing the bright smiles all around.
As if it was possible, the reception was even better than the ceremony. The toasts were both funny and touching. All eyes were on the happy couple who sat at their special table on the elevated platform for all to see.
Unable to hear what was being said but they could only assume it was something heartfelt based on the way your hands had clasped over your mouth.
Jungkook had just rolled up the sleeve of his left arm, showing you a new tattoo that you'd never seen. It was a delicate dark vine that wrapped around his forearm, with blossoming flowers, encircling the words 'Garden of Destiny', just like from your book.
"Are those-" You point to the types of flowers, "Tiger Lilies and Cosmos, your birth flower? Yeah." You pout, "Please don't cry, you'll be so upset if you ruin your makeup." He gently moves a loose strand of your hair from your face with the same hand you'd just been examining, and that's when it hits you.
"It's on your left arm." He grins,
"Of course it is."
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𓆩♡𓆪This was only supposed to be 900 words. oops. 𓆩♡𓆪
𓆩♡𓆪 mentions and reblogs are always appreciated <3
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ufoend · 1 year
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∆ please help us
we can not afford any of our basic needs
i usually try to keep this as light as possible, but i have put this off for long enough that i have to post this. me and my partner desperately need help. we are just two gay people trying to make it alone here with absolutely no support system.
who we are: im j (or jet), im 24 year old trans guy whose had this account since 2014. i married my partner in 2018, we even met on tumblr when we were younger, we've been together for years. my partner is disabled (diagnosed with autism and seizure disorder and others)
what we need: our cat had an emergency surgery two years ago that means he needs to be on a prescription diet (hills urinary food) for his entire life. the vet suddenly said we need to bring him in again to get his prescription renewed and we cant order any more food for him until then, which he will not survive without, and he is not allowed to eat any alternative food without risking his life. we have less than half of a 8 lb bag of it which will not last him through the next month. with the vet, food, and ubers to get to the vet and to the only place they sell the food = 200
to try to summarize our situation, we were kicked out by family and made officially homeless for the first time last year. this is right after we moved across states (wa to az) to support my partners family upon their request, only to be subjected to abuse and kicked out directly due to homophobia in an unfamiliar state after a few months. this left both of us and all of our animals entirely homeless. we luckily have an apartment now but our situation is still not okay. we lost all of our belongings at this time, everything, and have not been able to replace them as we have fixed income. my partner is especially affected by this situation, as it was traumatizing, and they have just had to power through trauma after trauma because of poverty, more than i can say.
i also have severe dental problems that are not covered by medicaid in az and i have no way to afford. this includes wisdom teeth, root canals, and many cavities that will turn into that crazy expensive treatment if i don't fix it. some may remember this (+this). i was only able to have a little bit of work done before we were homeless and one root canal failed. i cant keep ignoring it, because they are worried about two of the cavities becoming root canals, and i want to prevent another infection, but thats at least 250 each.
we are still not going to be able to afford rent in future months because our EBT was delayed last month and i had to spend money we don't have to afford anything, and now we are in serious jeopardy even affording rent, let alone bills. our pets (2 cats 1 small dog) also desperately need vaccinations, which is dangerous to keep going this overdue without with their health problems. our dog has also been limping for the past week and he needs to be seen when that is ever possible.
any donations would go first to the vet appointment and cat food, then the other needs in order of priority. will keep updating this, i know its a lot and i really don't expect anything, i am begging for help with any of this
we are both students, we are trying to work towards stability, while being stuck here. i do everything i can to bring in money to support us on my own. we make 200 less than rent is monthly. i am in school to become a caseworker so i am aware of a lot of resources in my area, and have applied for everything, but we can not do this alone which is why i have to ask for help. i am so sorry for having to do this but i appreciate any support that i do have because of this website. you guys literally save my life. helping out other poor people and getting helped out on here has been the most compassion ive ever been a part of. dollars, even pennies, worth of donations has kept my cat safe, has affected me in real ways. it actually matters to us, no matter the amount.
thank you anyone who reblogs, donates anything, or reaches out.
*
p*ypal email (best): [email protected]
v*nmo: @tobler707
c*shapp: $tobler707
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starvi-boi · 6 days
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yall asked me how i did it so here we go:
first of all, if you dont struggle with an ed or are in recovery than dont interact or read this. i am pro recovery for everyone except myself. stay safe everyone!!
my situation:
im 167 cm tall
i started at 67.7kgs and now im 43kgs, (bmi 24.3 -> 15.4)
i live with my parents and they after two months noticed and now they watch what i eat
it took me around 5 months but during 2 of them i was just maintaining because of miscalculations and binges
1) meals:
i do omads, its really effective, keep it around 350 - 900 cals a day, i used to fast for few days every now and then but omads work wonders
heres how my week looks:
mon: 400-700
tue: 400-800
wen: 400-600
thu: 350-650
fri: 400-800
sat: 900-1200
sun: 850-1250
omading dinner works quite well and so does omading breakfast, but i prefer dinners, i can keep my morning skinny all day and i dont have to walk outside being bloated af
2) exercise:
i do around 5 hours climbing a week, after 3 months i added a 20 minute workout every day that i dont climb, also sometimes i spent whole days climbing on rocks outside
i also have 2 hours of pe a week
i try to get at least 5k steps, mostly i get around 6k a day
im not a try hard in exercise, sometimes i go inline skating but its for fun
i dont distract burnt cals from the days total. i dont.
3) pürging:
i used to pürge anything that was over 500 cals, but it was useless, dont do it, its not helping, i did this only the first 2 months because of guilt
4) binging:
before i began eating less, i used to binge like 4 times a week (around 4k cals), it used to be my coping mechanism
at first i didnt binge at all, i didnt eat because of guilt, i hated food
lately ive been binging on low-cal stuff which is bad, but at least its not as high cal (i actually crave low-cal things), but now i tell myself this: 'enjoy the emptiness, nothing can fill in the void inside, especially not food' and it has helped a lot
but im not rlly sure what to do about it- it just sometimes happens
5) weight ins:
i do them everyday in the evening before dinner, i dont drink water during the day (dont do this, i forget to drink and am used to that, stay hydrated), which makes me not want to eat because id gain the food and water weight, if i knew i was having two meals id weight in in the morning
6) metab days:
since i live with my parents who now check on me, i do them on weekends - both days, i mostly binge on those days (sometimes even 3k cals) lol
i aim for 900-1100 cals on them because on other days i try to restrict as much as possible and my bmr is around 1200
even though they seem scary, theyre very much needed!!
7) rituals:
i dont snack, only gum - it works amazing (i go through like 30 a day :'))
i always plan my cals for the day in the morning and always add in the food before eating it
i spend a lot of time on edblr and edtwt and edtt, motivating
i always have an emergency snack on me and water, im allowed to eat it if im too dizzy or too weak
8) my tips:
never eat alone. never.
eat only at the table - it makes it really annoying to sit there while eating which makes me not wanna eat
romanticize hunger (not the best but ykyk), be a good ana, be pure, be pretty
wear layers, youre gonna be freezing all the time
vaping/smoking can help if youre already into it, dont start with it just because i said it might work
be patient.
skip any meal you can, fake eating, empty packages, hiding food in clothes, taking in to your room, dirty plates, sitting and staring at an empty cup licking the clean spoon over and over as if the cup was full so you seem like youre eating... anything
dont obsess over food, obsess over being skinny and over fasting!!
dont eat more than 2 meals a day
prepare your own food so you can calculate it right
high volume low cal stuff and high protein stuff are your new best friends (lettuce, peppers, cucumbers, pickles, rice cakes, tomatoes, melons, coldfish, chicken breasts, cottage cheese)
warm water fills you up, so does coffee and tea
be nice to yourself, reward yourself when you do good, make it a game - points for being good -> rewards you can buy with your points, when you mess up you have to extract few points
take it slow, one day at a time or one week at a time, you have plenty of time, messing up is okay (one binge doesnt make you fat just as one fast doesnt make you skinny, but doing it repeatedly will)
if youre getting weak -> increase your cals, its better to get your energy back but maintain for few weeks than it is to be weak and passing out
9) do what works for you
i cant do longer fasts because of my family, just because this worked for me doesnt mean its gonna work for you, find what you can do and stick with it
i really suck at portion control so i omad, its way easier for me to not eat than to eat small amounts through out the day
thats it for now!! thanks for reading, if i think of something more ill write it down!!
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opens-up-4-nobody · 11 months
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sonic-adventure-3 · 11 months
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I accidentally drew the same goddamn pose 3 times lmao. Why is posing legs so hard i always fall back on posing them in the shape of a 4. Also, new freak!! Her name is Jerryjack. More about her + individual images + couple other things below the cut vvv
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I don’t think I’ve posted any drawings of her other than her first, but i’ve been drawing rig a lot more like this rather than that first one. More graphic head shape, more upright ears, one eye hidden, mouth hidden by scarf, what have you. I think she looks cooler and is way easier to draw like this, but is a little less sonicy, im sure I’ll find a balance sometime. Rare carrion non-blep, this pose is cool but i did not even try cleaning this up lol.
And jerryjack!! She sucks so bad i love her. They’re Rig’s best friend, known each other since they were kids and learned the trade (killing) under the same mentor. She’s 11 months older than Rig, so she’s about 25ish. She hates consistency, commitment, seriousness, kids, stagnation, compassion, anything boring, and many many other things. She loves anything fun, stirring shit, lying, inflicting blunt force trauma, herself, lockpicking, and money. She’s purely self-interested and does everything she does for funsies. She’s not a part of the postal crew cause she thinks it’s boring and is allergic to commitment but hangs around and ‘helps out’ sometimes. She’s a hitman on her own, and has way more connections through that than rig, occasionally floats jobs her way. Also sometimes places bounties on her when shes mad. Or just cause.
Unlike Jerry, Rig is a very routine and organized person. She wakes up every morning at 6 sharp despite not being a morning person. Miraculously, she and jerry lived together for 2 years and during that time rig ate microwaved oatmeal every single morning and got groceries on tuesdays. All this is to say Rig is very methodical and likes routing and things that are expected. So Jerry lost their shit when rig called them randomly and casually told them that she’s starting a non-euphemistic postal service and also spontaneously took in a couple kids. Naturally, she’s very wary of squabble and carrion, especially the latter. Assassin recognizes assassin, silly recognizes silly, they try to kill each other and then become besties (who still periodically attempt to kill each other). As for squabble, she’s surprisingly fun to interact with, so jerry warms up fairly quick and becomes a truly awful influence on her.
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Here’s the first drafts and base. She’s obviously a jackalope but calls herself a hare for some reason. Is part of that reason because i couldn’t think of a pun name other than jack like jackrabbit and ‘jack the jackalope’ sounded a little too stupid for my taste (as if ‘jerryjack’ isn’t stupider)? Ummmmmmm.
Anyway, i decided to nix the asymmetrical antlers cause theres a limit to how much asymmetry i should stuff into a set of characters, carrion’s already got the lopped off ear and etc. the back and tail marking is supposed to emulate ribs
I’m still super duper undecided on jerry’s outfit and colour scheme. Every outfit ive thought up so far feels way too simple or untethered to reality in comparison to the postal crew’s, however i think the postal crew is a bit too complicated (or way too complicated in squabble’s case) and too grounded for sonic, so. Idk what to do abt that. And as for their colour scheme, as seen above her first drafts have the same red and green of the postal crew, but seeing as she doesn’t work with them it’s definitely the better choice to diverge from that. Saturated orange is the most tense and unsettling colour to me so i think it suits her off putting nature, but the white and orange combo reminds me intensely of like. 1960s egg chairs. WAIT and ulala space channel 5. And various stupid tech startup kitchen gadgets. Just generally a combo with a lot of nonthreatening and safe associations rather than the warning sign i want. Idk man i’ll workshop it eventually.
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Also, cloak rig. Her previous red coat was stupid. Not sure how much smarter this is but it looks cooler. Still doesn’t usually wear it other than in towns to hide her wings or when it’s cold. Also also this is the same fucking pose again
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maplleaf · 1 year
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"Snow and Stars"
Dainsleif x gn!reader
{cw: Dain pining harder than when Khaenri'ah got destroyed}
BRO I HAD THIS IN MY DRAFTS FOR LIKE 2 MONTHS AND NEVER GOT AROUND TO CONTINUING IT 💀
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You sighed, the calming warmth after hours of walking around the cold mountain that is Dragonspine finally hits you. The curse that the Gods gave hurts as hell sometimes, but it does ive an extra layer of resistance to the cold.
Surviving the Cataclysm as a Khaenri'ah citizen seems more like a curse than a blessing. The literal curse that the Gods inlaid upon you is a sore thumb. Not wanting to gain attention from people; and possibly Gods, you retreated to Dragonspine. The barren snowland making it easy for you to blend in, it's been like that for the past 500 years.
Unfortunately someone at the Adventurer's Guild decides it would be great to start using Dragonspine as the 'peak of an adventurer's strenght', causing many adventurers to come here.
The sudden interests of adventurers made you uneasy. They pop up unexpectedly in Dragonspine when the only reason you're here is to avoid people for fuck's sake!
You swear to your long-gone homeland that the adventurer would get frostbite.
Just as your legs were starting to feel less numb, you hear footsteps coming from behind.
"Shouldn't you be resting somewhere more safe?"
Ah yes, that deep and recognizable voice. "Dain, you need something?" Just as you looked back, you realized how Dain isn't looking the best as usual, "abyss fight again?"
"You could describe it as that," Dainsleif sat besides you. It's common to see the Twilight Sword alongside you. As the few Khaenri'ah survivors of the Cataclysm who still has their humanity left, the both of you got along well.
You both stayed quiet whilst looking at the corrupted dragon's heart in front of you two; the heavier air doesn't affect the both of you but it does give warmth around the cave. "It's really unsettling that the heart is still beating..." you commented.
Dainsleif chuckled, "then look for another cave to seek warmth, a fire would suffice."
You disregarded his idea with a scoff, "with all the adventurers running around? No thanks. They'll end up dragging me to Mondstadt as a new species of hilichurl or something."
You leaned back against the red ground you're sitting on, feeling much more at ease with the calming warmth and no sounds of anyone else nearby, and of course the added safety from Dainsleif. "So, are you here to regain some energy or just to comment on my life decisions?"
"I wanted some companion, that's all," Dainsleif answered truthfully. After seeing his past soldier back at the Chasm, he wanted some time to be with someone from his past again; even if the two of you didn't know eachother back then.
"A companion," you couldn't help but laugh, "worked out well last time." Dainsleif's lack of words made you feel guilty for the jab, "but I'm glad you came to me, the snowy mountains started to feel lonely."
When the traveler's sibling joined the abyss, Dainsleif devoted his next hundreds of years to prevent them from destroying Teyvat. He expected it to be a long and lonely path; to which his expectations are broken when he finds himself befriending someone with the same curse as him within the snowstorms of Dragonspine.
"It is much safer at least," Dainsleif glances at you; the last person he knows from his homeland that, like him, prefers the peace that reigns over Teyvat now.
He doesn't remember the exact moment when he fell for you, his feelings more like raindrops than a hard pouring rain that comes out of nowhere. Your presence brings him comfort he thought he didn't deserve anymore, sometimes he feels that he doesn't even deserve you.
Even with all those thoughts, Dainsleif still finds himself getting closer to you, and he's scared.
Dainsleif have lost too many things; his homeland, his people, his companion. Thoughts about you leaving him when he's vulnerable, or some kind of disaster taking you away makes him scared.
The Twilight Sword would rather distance himself away than to see you in danger. Chances are is that Dainsleif himself is the person who would endanger you with all the enemies he made.
You couldn't help but glance at the former knight. I's rare to see Dainsleif look so, for the lack of a better term, absent-minded. You've seen him focused before, yet it's the first time he has this expression.
Your hand subconsciously start to move as you fall into temptation.
Poke
The twilight sword held the cheek that you poked with your finger, a small hue of pink shades his face; it's almost invisible if you're not looking at it closely, "What're you doing?"
You couldn't help but smile at his adorable reaction. It's probably the first and last time you'll see him flustered, so it's best to savor the moment.
"Nothing," Dainsleif didn't seem too convinced with your answer but brushed it off anyway.
You wonder how long it'll take for him to realize that you know about his infatuation towards you.
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mardytoast · 19 days
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🍄🪐📚
🍄headcanon for one of your favourite ships/pairings🍄
clyde and craiggg
craig introduced clyde to fnaf when they were like 10 to scare him bc clydes scared of everything but he actually ended up eating it up. they play it together and the next day clyde knows ALL the lore and craigs the one getting freaked out. he'll play all the games, scream, but then be like 'that was awesome' while Craig pretends hes not horrified out of his mind bc he cant accept that clyde is somehow less of a pussy than him. this obsession never fades.
man like clyde, scared of gingers, dressed up as hyper realistic springtrap for halloween when he was 13
🪐name three good things going on in your life right now🪐
very grateful to be in a position to answer this!!
1. i joined a discord server of poets for napowrimo (poetry month)
im finally able to share my work with people with experience, who care, appreciate and are able to give me really good feedback
it's only been a few days but i kinda love them🤭 also im being spoilt with soulful poetry
2. im getting better at guitar!! ive been learning for 3 months now but i haven't been practicing much so progress is slow. IN SAYING THAT THOUGH, i can see a crazy amount of improvement. callouses are pretty non existent but ive memorised a few chords and currently im trying to master pompeii by bastile
i am delighteddd to no ends bc it means i can start putting music to my songs!! alr done it with one!!
3. gonna split this between two small things. a.) summer is upon us, so im very excited. b.) i think ill be able to reconcile with one of my friends i fell out with for a stupid reason. im going to try talk to her and im feeling confident!!
📚what's the last thing you wrote down in your notes app?📚
the last thing i wrote was a song called 'if eurydice could see me now' and it's from a napowrimo prompt. i shared it with the server and they liked it :)
it's very inspired by tear you apart by she wants revenge
it's based on greek mythology, you can look up eurydice to read abt it <33
here's a little exert:
oh muse i can't face you now
i would die, to bring you back
i play my lyre and don't believe the man
im not a fool, im just overwhelmed
blood pooling in the imprint you left
but i leave, there'll be no poets
i arise to the heart's music
i gave up, now i just make it
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n1a · 7 months
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its nice to see how far ive come in the past few years even though its been hard. i graduated frm baking/pastry school when i was 17. i finally sought out a job baking when i was 20 after working a couple other jobs. that job wasnt a good fit for me n i wanted to give up bcus i thought i wasnt fast enough (i literally had lyme disease n they were giving me shit for it?? like) but then a few months later i got a job at a store that has a bakery in it and i got promoted to bakery manager after working here for less than 2 years. nd i get to have a lot of freedom w it... i make cupcakes n decorate them, i've been making pies n we get really busy on thanksgiving from all the orders. im pretty much allowed to make whatever i want & i decorated the bakery kitchen itself to look cute. like i put a bunny calendar on the bulletin board, we have cute things to put ingredients in like this ceramic cupcake to put sanding sugar in and a giant strawberry to put struessel topping in , and i got pink heart tacks to use on the bulletin board. i just am really grateful that i have so much freedom to do what i want at my job n even though it's hard to get up every morning and i often feel depressed, it's one of the few things that make me happy and i honestly look forward to going to work. (just not waking up, lol)
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panda-writes-kpop · 9 months
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2 Years With Panda-Writes-Kpop
2 years. Holy shit.
The last two years have been chaotic and adventurous, entertaining and draining, and fun and emotional, but I wouldn't take back any of it. ❤️ I've had so much fun maintaining, managing, commenting, and being this online persona that you've all come to see, interact with, and enjoy. I mean, 1,300+ followers is absolutely nuts to me - I just enjoyed writing for the sake of writing and self-improvement. To see engagement on this level has been mind-blowing and phenomenal, and I'm so thankful. You've all helped lead me to new friendships and new experiences, and I couldn't be happier and more thankful to all of you.
So, here comes some good news - I won't be fully ending this blog. There just won't be regular posts or longer fics with complex storylines. I've come to the realization, over my 2 month hiatus from writing, that I enjoy writing for K-pop idols in smaller amounts, like with drabbles or reaction-style content with the idols that I currently write for. In simpler terms, after December 1st, I'll be taking a one-month hiatus before posting content that is similar to the slushie prompts and other reactions that I've done in the past.
There's a lot of work that I want to get done to help transition into the phase, and I think you'll find these changes helpful and necessary.
And the easiest, introduce you to @kit-kat-katie 😌 This is my writing blog for other fandoms like the Hunger Games and Obey Me. This blog will also hold any longer-style fics or fics that feature a different writing style than what you might be used to here. (I'm putting up a Ryujin fic in a week or so.... so you should go follow if you wanna see that. 🤭)
Separate and re-vamp my rules for writing and my navigation page. It's an absolute train wreck right now, and the end goal is to make it user-friendly to me and to you.
Revamp the masterlist - again, mostly because I think I'm about to hit the link limit on mobile for the Dreamcatcher page, but it also needs some fixing up, plus I want to add some more groups to the main masterlist.
Add more groups and soloists to the masterlist - this is just me needing to sort through variety content for these groups, but if you're curious, here are the groups. (Aespa, New Jeans, IVE, Somi, Eunbi, and more to come, probably.)
Re-open requests. This should be the last and final thing I need to do for this blog. I'm going send out a post when I do, and I'll be encouraging requests to help me finish the slushie prompts since that'll be my goal for 2024. 🥰
Revamp @archive-of-queens - This blog was supposed to be about archiving this blog, but since I'm no longer doing that, it'll serve as a graveyard to all the ideas that never came to life. I just need to fix the intro post, and then I can start to release the content that's been sitting there for a while.
I also need to overhaul the WIP page, but that'll happen in that one-month hiatus.
I'm so excited to start a new era - an era that will be less stressful on me but still provide quality content for you all. I will not be missing the schedule of the WIP that I currently have 🫣 so I'm hoping that having more freedom with less time constraints can help the creativity flow more. ❤️ Thank you for being along for the ride, and I'm so happy that you all will hopefully choose to stay with me for what's to come.
Thank you for a great two years, and here's to next year. 💗
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mcl38 · 5 months
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I personally think it’s not that nowadays Lando cares about Carlos less than Carlos does about him, I think it’s more about him getting fed up with repeated questions about his friendships with other drivers and with Carlos in particular, and actual journalists using these cringe words like ‘bromance’ and stuff, it’s annoying as fuck. He still answers that he gets along well mostly with Carlos and Max, so kudos to him for keeping it professional and not telling them to fuck off haha he’s literally asked about this all the time, like, everyone and their dog know by now who his friends are, journalists need to give it a rest already and ask him better questions
so like yeah, i do think its mostly that. lando hates few things more than people placing their own narratives on him, or thinking they know things abt his personal life that they dont. also, one of those few things (he hates even more) is cringe, or maybe in particular outdated-cringe - i genuinely think if someone mentions milk at him nowadays he might just curdle (ha) and die on the spot. so like. carlando and bromances in general hit BOTH of those spots. its as if theyre designed specifically to piss him off
but beyond that, i think uh. hm. how do i phrase this. i think fundamentally carlos and lando have slightly different attitudes towards competition, and also that.... i want u to bear w me on this one bc i say this w all my love for lando but i think carlos is just a bit more caring and sentimental as a person
what i mean abt the diff attitudes is hugely informed by this video i saw today (pretty sure @/vegasgrandprix linked to it so ill try to find it and insert it here!) where carlos said he'd maybe give a centimetre more leeway to fernando and lando when racing wheel to wheel. he goes on to say that that doesnt rly mean much and that hes touched with lando and fernando before so clearly it doesnt make a difference, but at the same time this is the first driver ive ever heard say this in any capacity. compare this with landos very straightforward 'once you're on track you don't think about those things anymore and all you want is to beat them' like. i genuinely dont think carlos features in landos thoughts at all when hes in the cockpit - which i wouldnt expect either! but apparently lando features in carlos's
i think u can rly see this when u compare what they both said abt singapore. lando, assuming carlos's racer brain works like his, says in all his interviews that carlos wouldve just done that for anyone and it doesnt make any difference that its them two. meanwhile, carlos fully explicitly says that he finds it more special bc he and lando were cooperating & managed to get a 1-2. that kind of clearly shows a difference in mindset beyond lando just not wanting to play the media game
abt what i meant saying carlos is a more caring person, in their relationship particularly - i just think hes always been rly attentive towards lando and has just like kinda kept doing it even after he moved teams. i rmbr watching their presser together a few months ago where carlos was being sooo delicate abt lando clearly being worse at golf bc he hadnt played in a while, & it rly reminded me of their dynamic back when they were teammates - while landos always found carlos funny and respected him as a racer, carlos was the one actively attentive to landos mood swings, self criticism, anxiety, etc. i think seeing lando at his (self-described) worst in terms of mental state has made carlos always harbour a sort of protectiveness towards him that lando cant and also isnt expected to reciprocate.
so like yeah i dont think landos lying when he says hes closest to max and carlos on the grid. he DOES get along w carlos and makes an effort to hang out w him when he can. i just think carlos has a slightly more open or emotional character, which reflects as a vague imbalance in their friendship
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urf1lterr · 11 months
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hi besties,
first of all- ty for the sweet messages! ik ive been taking some time off bc of school and work :( but it’s summer and despite me taking summer classes, i don’t want to leave everyone hanging for months.
i really want to try and make weekly updates (maybe one every 2 weeks if my classes and work are crammed) instead of making you wait.
so far, here’s the schedule i plan on fulfilling.
lovesick- next chapter (jun 17th-19th)
afterglow- final chapter (jun 26th-28th)
these are subject to change and aren’t official.
i could post earlier than the estimated dates or later, but these are my proposed days i am fighting to update. (don’t plan on posting these wayyyyyyy later in time if they aren’t posted on it’s approximated day- maybe less than a week).
but pls note- even though i have these days scheduled, i could still post today or sooner maybe if i have a great writing day !!
for future chapters of lovesick and other stories (i have many drafts of new work on the way!), i will post another schedule once these two updates are cleared.
have a blessed day 🫶🏼
WAIT I FORGOT TO ADD THISSSSS.
im re-uploading and posting (from my drafts) some other works for other artists/celebrities ive made in the past (like bts LMAO).
so if you aren’t interested in them, don’t worry! ik majority of my followers are pedro pascal stans so u can just skip them. but i do want to add them to my newly updated masterlist within these two weeks!
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