#itll be so fucking fun once i can ACTUALLY FUCKING WRITE IT

[rouge-the-bat]

adhd is homophobic bc its preventing me from writing my incredibly gay fics

#i have so many kur.ahi fic ideas #ive been hyperfixated on them for months and getting so many beginnings of fic planning #but once my brain loses the spark of New Idea Formation then it will not let me focus for shit to devlop any particular fic idea more #its driving me CRAZY #i just want to write my gay shit!!!! all the fluff!!! mutual pining before getting together!!! soft first times and shameless kinky smut!!! #please brain i am BEGGING just let me write. P L E A S E #i particularly wanna work on my fic idea where kuwa.bara realizes hi.ei has a crush on kur.ama #and kuwa.bara immediately decides to be hi.eis wingman despite hi.eis constant protests against that #and hi.eis constant denial of having feelings for kur.ama lmao #itll be so fucking fun once i can ACTUALLY FUCKING WRITE IT

[rshmra]

PRETTY BOY!

plot: niki swears he met the girl of his dreams at the convenience store late one night- however, his discovery proves to be misguided. the "girl" he likes is actually just a really pretty boy, and he's the main vocalist of the new and wildly popular boy group of four, X_CAPE.

<- prev. masterlist. next ->

written: 0.5k words

chapter one: you had one job

yn was in a frenzy trying to find something to cover his face when he took notice of someone's gaze on him.

he'd been too preoccupied with responding to a text after escaping from the dorm window to remember to put on a face mask, only realizing with a jolt at his destination much later. if by some unfortunate circumstance dispatch managed to spot him, management (and ivory) would be furious.

now, he assumes he looks very much an idiot as he hides in a corner of the convenience store, emptying his tote bag frantically in an attempt to find anything that might better obscure his identity. complaining about his shit luck is a habit at this point, but did he really have to be proven right again? christ on a cracker, it's so difficult to always be correct.

and to make things even worse, a guy just walked into the aisle while yn was dropping random shit- oh fuck, he's staring.

i'm so screwed.

yn rushes to regain his composure, gathering his belongings hurriedly and feeling brave enough to steal a glimpse at the other teen from his crouched position. (embarrassing, but how could he resist checking him out?) the boy's ogling him with wide eyes, soft hair curling out slightly from beneath his hood. he's tall and slim, and due to the mask he's wearing yn can't gauge his expression, but if he had to guess? he'd definitely say the dude's mouth is hanging open.

well, jesus. do i look that odd?

...wait, he's cute.

not allowing his thoughts to wander for too long, yn glances back down at the ground (still half-kneeling, mind you). either the cute boy had already recognized him, or was just intensely weirded out... so, two main options for the scenario at hand. one: risk it even more, ask for a spare mask and hope for the best, or two: don't, and hope for the best.

psh, yolo.

yn bounds to his feet in an instant, boldly striding up to the bewildered boy and silently praying he made the right choice. "hey, um. do you have another mask i could use?" jesus, this man is a fucking skyscraper.

he blinks once. twice. thrice? yn shifts, rubbing the back of his neck. "it's fine if you don't-"

"no, i think i uh- i- i might have, um..." he trails off quietly, patting down his pockets and leaving yn reeling inwardly. HIS VOICE BRO?!:((#!*&!1_! "i actually do." the teen lends the shorter a mask, and yn finds himself unable to contain his relief.

"oh my god, you're a lifesaver- thank you so, so much!" perhaps it's a little dramatic to clasp the stranger's hands in his, yet it barely occurs to the vocalist as he rushes away, leaving the lanky boy standing there flustered.

neither can tell why the other looks somewhat familiar, but for now there are tweets to be tweeted and thoughts to be thunk.

notes: begging u to ignore timestamps numbers and emojis I DONT HAVE AN IPHONE. esp pretend the times in the texts arent there cus its all fucked up. the writing is mediocre but i promise u itll get better... SAME FOR THE TEXTS. i had fun w it but i think i took it too long 😭😭 lmk what yall think... next update sundayy

taglist: @silkentides @nikikids @luveuly @totoroblop @winter-world

#x reader #enhypen #enhypen smau #enhypen x reader #nishimura riki #niki x reader #enha niki #enha x male reader #enha x reader #male reader

[p0rchc0ll4ps3]

it's time for jean himages (horse images). i want to trace and color some of these digitally but itll take three years so here's what i have for now. so im posting on this blog for the headcanons and bc they're not full art pieces yet

anyways these r just sketchbook doodles so theyre not the greatest anatomywise (bc i fix them in post (ie digitally)) but you know what i stare at them so much so here

jean rides his horse in the french style which involves Lightness (a way of like. communicating with your horse and making sure the horse's needs are met, i think) so he's. really gentle with his horse. he braids the horse's hair in dressage style so button braids on top and then plaited tail. it's a big black horse with a white blaze and white socks (yeah im a horsegirl too) (in my digitally lined version of that third image, i spent like an hour making sure all the tack was accurate to the riding style. this is just the initial sketch so it's not accurate here, so you're just going to have to pretend)

harry rides horse a mixture of western and english bc he always does everything his own way, and kim (and judit not pictured) rides english bc that's the standard rcm procedure for horse. also as part of the mounted cop uniform, they have to have riding helmets lol

i think harry's horse is a small chestnut mare with a blaze and stockings, and kim's is a little bigger dark bay. they're quarter horses / thoroughbreds mostly. tho tbh they're probably elysium / insulinde specific horsebreeds that i don't know about

kim hates doing horse bc the horse never listens to him. he's used to kineema! so he's too tight on the reins. but then he ends up liking the horse anyways

obviously a lot of these r not too canon to my headcanons bc there's a few ooc phrasings and some things aren't solidified to events that i want to write about but that's ok. i'm working on writing some kinda' post-Martinaise dynamics bw Jean, memory-loss Harry, and Kim as well as the others at the 41st, and I want a lot of 'Jean has to teach Kim how to ride horse' in there. coz i think it would be fun to write kim 'wow jean is competent??? and i have to take orders from him even though i fucking hate his guts???' kitsuragi lol. making kim not good at something for once and he hates it so much how tf do you stay professional when the horse keeps misbehaving and you can't control her

also im headcanoning that all the motor carriages in insulinde at least are the british way: driver on the right, passenger on the left. carriages / horses on the road on the left (bc the rcm patch is on your right shoulder, so when you pass people on the left they can see it (if you're doing it the "normal" way ie driving/walking on the right, people can't see your patch when you pass them (i know this from experience bc i put white tape on my trenchcoat rcm-style)))

transcript for my handwriting under cut

First Image: jean on horse in the top middle: It's not a motor carriage, Kitsuragi. Loosen up on the reins. kim on horse in the top middle: I know that, Officer.

kim in the car middle left: It's not a horse, Officer. You're driving too carefully.

jean in the doorway bottom middle: Hah! You're talking to the horse! Sucker! kim with the horse bottom middle: I was just putting on her bridle Vic!

Second Image: Jean to Kim bottom right: Maybe next time you'll actually pay attention when someone's trying to fucking share knowledge with you.

Third Image: Jean on left: Hurry it up back there Lieutenant, we don't have all fucking day. Harry in middle: He's got this, Jean! Jean: Don't Jean me. Harry: He'll be fine! Kim on right: If you had let me keep the Kineema, we'd be there by now.

#these doodles are just a trick for y'all to read my hella' long as fuck texposts #bc i have SO MANY GODDAMNED THOUGHTS ABOUT EVERYTHING #about the Characters and the Worldbuilding and the Dynamics and the Plot #literally so fixated on this media it's incredible #doodles #my art #jean vicquemare #harry du bois #kim kitsuragi #jean horsegirl vicquemare #disco elysium #horses #de #also eyes is there in the second image but dw about him thats a bad drawing of him

[acaciapines]

Your nanowrimo pieces are soooo goooood they hit so hard fr fr. I’m especially LOVING today’s one with the owl & the collector even tho I don’t rlly know that much abt toh bc I haven’t watched it but I can tell that u LOVE IT & I can’t wait to learn more thru osmosis once the fic is poooosteeeed✨ (i WILL read it i PROMISE i SWEAR)

Anyways give us the thoughts, the tea, tell us how you make the words do that✨ anything u wanna give in regards to today’s bit!! We’re not picky!

Hope y’all are doing okay! Gal says hi :) Remember to eat and drink something, take breaks, and look after yourselves and each other! We love you! This has been a Daily Interaction Ask <3

he he :3 im glad youre enjoying!! its been really fun to pick out my favorite bits even when usually those are the ones w/out context lol. look at my owl and weep boy. firefly <3

YOU WILL LEARN SO MUCH VIA OSMOSIS....literally now that im also doing something for s1 its like. why watch owl house we have owl house at home (the owl house at home is a 1 million word daemon au) (<- 1 mil is not a joke btw idk if it'll hit it but itll at least come very close. no idk why i did this.)

as for today! hmmm...

its truly so fun to write the collector. like im not joking about him being my favorite owl house character despite his maybe twenty total minutes of screentime, so its been such a JOY to expand his role in this series!!

bc like. god. actually i think i wrote a whole like. bit of flash fiction/prose poetry type thing for them a while ago. probably in my files somewhere. but just. youre an immortal eight year old. you are in these years where you need to interact with other people for your own mental stability and health. to figure out the whole Being A Person thing. and you are trapped for like, centuries. trapped away from everyone and everything and DUST, which, in universe, in literally connection personified. you're cut off from all of this.

and you are, let me say again, eight years old.

truly the collector is just. hes had everyone he ever cares about leave him--his siblings the other archivists left him behind not out of any sense of cruelty, really, but because caring about people just isnt really a thing they do. quite frankly they live so long they didnt even notice. theyre far-away stars. not far because they're mean. just because thats what stars do.

and then king's dad (who um. doesnt have a name <3 this is why the collector calls him 'the big bully' its literally bc i never gave him a name--) was an adult the collector actually trusted and looked up to (he meshed REALLY WELL into titan society until the archivists started Doing A Murder since titans are the only beings that match them in power and they have very very different ideas about dust). like ive said before the collector is owlbeastkin but before that they never had a super stable sense of identity--in another world where they stayed w/ the titans they wouldve ended up a titan.

and then king's dad just. trapped him in a tablet forever.

and like, to be fair to king's dad he was reacting out of fear and the best knowledge he had (he assumed the collector led the archivists to the titans, and like, he did, but its not like he knew he was doing that, and, you know, poor guy had seen a huge chuck of his fellow titans killed including babies and eggs of which he had an egg to consider), but it still TRAPPED THEM. and then he died and so did all the rest of the titans so nobody could free the collector even if they wanted to.

and then BELOS, who manipulated and lied to the collector for so long and was also literally his only friend after being alone forever, so like, of course the collector just blindly went along with whatever he said. he was gonna free them!! he listened to them when they talked about stardust which nobody else ever did! he had no idea what the fuck a witch was! he just liked being able to see the stardust sometimes, and belos brought him to places with a lot of stardust. to destroy it, but like--you know. it was THERE.

but all these people were just USING them, and they never really understand that until king comes around. and king's also a scared eight year old!! but like. king's also not wrong. the collector did aid belos in destroying the entire isles. like no joke belos SUCCEEDS here. like not long-term obvi this has a happy ending but at the point we're in at for the future? it doesnt matter that the draining spell failed. all the palistrom trees are dead. witch society Cannot come back from that even if they did end up beating the collector. theyre doomed.

anyways what was i saying. collector. right.

so like, then they meet firefly/grr-click-growl/wings-across-night/the owl beast (king of having so many names i love her <3) and shes like, the first person who cares for them and ISNT using them. even king is using them!! but firefly has seen Some Shit. she sees the collector as a hatchling who was kicked out of his nest and is doing her best to be some sort of stable figure for him, but she doesnt Not see the stuff he's done.

the collector took over the world bc he's scared--all he's ever known is being used and trapped so he doesnt exactly trust most people easily. firefly would Love to not be in this world anymore. shes also got a loyalty to eda and king and luzmari. and, like, cool motive, still trapping an entire society of people.

but like. shes the one who is here right now and nobody else is trying to help this kid.

but the collector just. hes just an eight year old. a very, very old eight year old. but he doesnt understand things like "you can make the wrong choices and still choose to do better later" and "im mad at what you did but that doesnt mean i dont care about you."

he just sees someone upset with him. just sees another person who used him and doesnt care and is going to leave bc everyone leaves him and in a world where EVERY SINGLE PERSON comes in pairs, hes the only one who stands alone.

basically tl;dr: collector my beloved <3

#ask #daily interaction ask #toh #collector my beloved #yes this goes in the blog. hi wyn <3333333333 #me every time someone asks me about my fic: (forgets literally everything ive ever written) #also me: heres too many words about the collector lol #I JUST. LOVE THEM. LOVE TALKING ABOUT THEM #THANK U FOR ENABLING ME <333333 #i will never be free until 2-3 years from now when i post the final chapter of this fic <3 #get ready for the LONG. HAUL. #and a grove of palistrom to you

[ohpossuhm]

even the replies to a jellyfish post can be rage bait if youre a me and filled with rage all the time/lh

(very rambly btw)

if something is 95%water you process the water as water, the 5% thats protein is protein, aside from the water in a jellies body, its literally like, 99.99% protein.

watermelon is 92%water

and people just hating on it as a food rubs me the wrong way in general, given its significance in several asian countries. no one is eating only jellyfish for the rest of their life unless youre a sea turtle in which case even you will eat a few plastic bags as well.

even if its just a fun texture snack and they did have 0 nutritional value who gives a single fuck, you shouldnt demand no one eat it or try to discredit it as a food at all- and also also no ones forcing you to try it, if its not your thing thats fine, typically the species being eaten (probably not 100% i wouldnt know, im not claiming to be some expert im just a guy who reads articles and a book sometimes) arent endangered. and if whatever species theyre talking about is endangered then its a entirely seperate conversation needing to be had not the nutritional value or culinary value

so many of the responses just felt very ethnocentric, unwilling to look at these several cultures thatve been doing it for hundreds or thousands of years completely writing it off

theres so many different ways to eat jellyfish too, saw one person saying “put that in the oven itll just evaporate” well if you dont want that dont put it in the damn oven! i dunno jellyfish crisps sounds pretty fun tho- ive mostly seen/heard of it in stir fry or noodle or raw so idk what theyre on about.

like i get it, people dont like new things anf thats so incredibly fine, its just a problemmm when you try to recruit people to your opinion as morally or in this case i guess nutritionally superior? it was phrasd a little poorly so i would consider it a little moral too tbh- but instead try this “oh i dont like that but you might” or “im not interesting in trying that but i wont be making anyone feel like they shouldnt try it” personally i dont wanna eat bugs for the texture, but fuck id try it once, especially if the texture issue was removed via turning it into a burger or cricket flour and into bread

i would fuck up a cricket burger tbh i love burgers

read some thing a whiiile ago about mixing cricket and beef to make burgers and the tasters couldnt tell the difference until it was 20%beef 80%cricket- thats probably a way over simplification of whatever they actually tried- i also think it was not a scientific study just some people making burgers

bugs are more efficient protein in terms of production- ie i give yiu 10lbs of corn u give me 8 lbs of cricket OR just 1 lbs of cow

if we wanna talk about overlooked sources of protein,,, fucking;

bugs are where its at dude

but jellyfish are good too! everyone’s food doesnt have to look the same and id argue it really really shouldnt

i love burgers i would kill 1,000,000 crickets for a burger

#maple soup #autism #me #my #not tagging with jellyfish #cause tbh i dont want anyone that responded w that stuff to come reply doubling down or backtrackingg and saying #🤓well youre/op/whoever is right about this 🤓🤓buuttt… #i dont caare i can be mad about some random tumblr replies #just like you can not like to eat jellyfish

[rainfallbeats]

IDK HOW EDIBLES WORK OK

*slaps my hands on the table* thats ok because i do!

this post ended up being multiple paragraphs long and contains a lot of personal stories so if youre still interested its under the cut. tw for drug use obviously

now granted i havent had that many of them and the only kind ive had were these cookies my brother made but good LORD. sweet JESUS they were strong. like STUPID strong. i remember he prefaced giving me them with "i ate one and thought i was a little worm wiggling in the dirt" and i was like ok i think i can handle it

i could not handle it. strong edibles will slonk your shit silly style. theyre a bit different than smoking because it kinda all kicks in at once, smoking is usually a milder high unless its like a bong rip. i remember one time it kicked in and i could barely get the words "guys i think the edible hit" out before breaking into a 10 minute laughing fit. i was on another plane i was shot up to the moon

and again these were particularly strong ones it really just depends on the strain of weed and the dosage, but some of the effects ive experienced are as follows:

everything is funny. like everything ever is funny. i will just laugh for any reason if im high enough, you could jangle keys in front of my face and id start cry laughing. weed kind of just makes you stupid like that. ive noticed it helps with the adhd too because ill finally have the patience to sit down and watch things or do tasks without getting irritated

pain numbing/weird funny skin feeling. ive noticed that i usually feel warm when the weed kicks in and thats usually followed by like a tingly feeling and a reduced ability to feel pain. this is nice bc im an idiot who gave myself back pain from sitting weird so this makes it go away. probably not anywhere near as effective for that purpose as pain meds but ive never been on any prescription pain meds or anything that wasnt like, ibuprofen so i dont know

food tastes really fucking good. ive considered going back on my adhd meds with recreational weed bc the meds were an appetite suppressant and thats why i had to stop taking them. weed will make you hungry as FUCK and everything you eat will taste better

lower impulse control, this one is kind of a bad side effect because if you were already thinking about doing stupid shit and you get high then youre gonna do it. one time i was on call with a friend and kept chewing on my fingers til they were bruised bc i wanted to chew on something

slowed perception of time/distorted perception of reality. this one is either scary or cool depending on the person but i find it enjoyable. time will slow DOWN like minutes will feel like hours. every splatoon match i play while high is the longest one of my life, and ive found i usually perform better in games because im less stressed and more just absorbed in what im doing. that combined with the fact that my brain blurs the line between whats real and fake so if im playing a game itll feel real to me. i will be staring at the inside of the grizzco building and feel like im actually there, its crazy. playing video games while high is fun

ive noticed that if i get too high i kinda feel dizzy and not in control of my body, my head feels like its underwater and ill be sitting there rocking back and forth waiting to come down a little. which would be scarier but thanks to the funny giggly chemicals its not that bad. but its also not pleasant when youre in a social situation and want to try to act normal

im not actually sure what me dumping all this info accomplishes but maybe someone will see it and itll help them write a character that smokes weed or something. and like granted these are only my own experiences and not everyone is gonna share them but regardless, thank you for the ask

#personal post #weed #ask box

[sorikkung]

4

4. what is the plot bunny you’ve been carrying for the longest? optional bonus question: do you ever wonder why you haven’t written it yet and experience deep existential dread?

oooooh this is actually a really fun question because im in the process of planning out the details for the biggest plot bunny ive been carrying for YEARS that i only just recently decided i wanted to actually do something with! the reason i havent written it for so long was bc it is so intimidatingly complex that itll take me forever to write and i didnt want to start something like that back when id only write like once a month at Best, but now that im getting into the groove of writing regularly im like fuck it imma give it a shot even if i dont end up finishing it itll be worth Something i guess.

the plotbun is a fic premise of an mc that travels across universes, from medieval high fantasy type universes to cyberpunk dystopian type universes and everything and anything in between. what makes it even more complex is that beyond the individual worldbuilding for MULTIPLE worlds, in many of them the mc existed in already, so by travelling across dimensions to ones they already had a life in, the two instances of themselves fuse, so they retain the memory and knowledge of both lifetimes but become one body, and cant stay in both realms at once anymore. that's.... the extremely short version, but i have been fleshing out the details lately and it gets incredibly intricate LOL i have an entire glossary im writing with all this lore and ive barely started.

its gonna be one hell of a longfic like at LEAST a few hundred thousand words, another multifandom polycule bc such is my Brand and multiple universes just means the polycule can get even bigger than ever before (as if a 15 person polycule wasnt already insane enough... i kind of have problems i think) as they span across dimensions but also multiple instances of the same person and its just. lord its so convoluted but i am having SO much fun with it bc this universe in its barest bones has been my go-to daydream universe for years now to explain all my individual daydream universes lolololol

anyway its not coming anytime soon bc its still very very early in the planning stages and will be one MONSTER of a jam-packed story, but do stay tuned for that!! the placeholder title rn that i might actually stick with is within the rift. theres a loooootta juicy stuff comin.

writer ask game!

#im actually really excited to write within the rift i just wish i didnt have to write it all by myself bc its gonna be soooo long fr SJDFKH

[rivetwrites]

Hi so 👉👈 i read the announcement wrong and didn't realize we could request more than one character so can I add Byakuya and Toko to the chubby reader headcanons? (Oh if you'd prefer to write just Mondo, ik those two aren't your favorites akakaka, could it be a small one shot just for him ?)

//ive actually been having trouble with byakuya and toko these past few days (personal reasons) so ill be doing mondo! my brain has been squeezed, so itll probably be headcanons for right now, but once i have a good idea, then ill do a oneshot in its own post!! - mod oma

»——————⋆◦★◦⋆——————«

Mondo with a chubby S/O!

Dear fucking god, he loves it and he loves you

Your confidence, your softness, literally everything

His favourite is when he lifts you up into his arms to carry you around

Or when you sit on his face lap, please sit on his lap, he loves how soft you are

Whenever you two are cuddling, he loves to have his hands on your stomach. It’s so warm and squishy!

If someone even fucking implies that they’re making fun of you, they’re fucking dead

Doesn’t even matter if they’re a girl (he would just yell at them), but if its a dude, hands are being thrown

But even their dumb words won’t take you down, he fucking adores how confident you are, he finds it so sexy

Because you absolutely should be!!

#mod oma #danganronpa #danganronpa x reader #mondo owada #mondo x reader #thh #dr1 #trigger happy havoc

[forestryfae]

Of COURSE these are the questions I ask!

💥:Favourite B10 Villian.

💢:Least Favourite B10 Villian.

✏ :What character(s) would you have liked to see more of, or have gotten better writing/screentime?

💥: Fistrick is great just because of the way he is. hes super smart, talks like a gym slash frat bro, is dressed kinda punk, and prbably listens to Insane Clown Posse or something. The Vreedle Brothers are fucking fantastic because of the way they talk even i i only understand half the shit they say sometimes but when i do im loving it. and because they love explosions and its hilarious to watch them bicker with ben and eachother and cus theyre just. so sweet. i would vibe with them. if they were real wed be friends and theyd never blow me up even by accident because were friends Albedo because hes a narcissistic bitch and like. hes not wrong. hes actually pretty justified in his anger. i also like his potential for found family and the whole azmuth is his dad theory its very fun and adds depth Mad Ben cus hes australian and mad max vibes. god i love his stinky sandy ass. eat chrome please maybe itll taste better than the lizards he 100% eats The other Evil Bens too just because (i dont count albedo as a ben) Charmcaster cus shes fucking dangerous and i love when shes talking to her purse or doing evil hot irl shit and also designs in os/ov are BEAUTFUL and even tho i dont LOVE her in uaf she was still an interesting villain. hate her uaf design tho like can you GET more evil disney villain design??? you cant. boring. Herve. his crime is being french. hes a supportive boyfriend tho so hes allowed to exist. 💢: Vilgax. listen. he was a FANTASTIC villain in os and the movie. but after that? they nerfed him, made him the butt of the joke, showed him as stupid, arrogant, and too selfabsorbed to realize what was up instead of cunning and ruthless, made him ask BEN for HELP against zskayr, gave him dramatic monologues, nerfed him again and made azmuth say he wouldnt be able to comprehend the omnitrix??? and had ben trick him with it by pretending hed teach vilgax how to use it??? hello??? he tried to steal it and he was able to atleast once before and USED it. it makes no sense. and the whole Daggon arc was so stupid. os vilgax would never. ov vilgax was a disappointment too, i liked the whole attea and co hunts vilgax ep and the vilgax and albedo team up was good alho albedo would NEVER. hes too petty and bitchy for pulling that shit twice. hed sooner team up with michael or charmcaster. like. vilgax was such a scary and ruthless villain in os and he was threathening, powerful, and actually something to worry about. he frequently hurt people, he stole the omntitrix at one point, he didnt exchange jokes with ben or do oneliners. he was just. brutal. so yeah i like uhhhh. 1/4th of him. the other 3/4ths i hate. i did like the ma vreedle joke but i honestly think it wouldve been more funny if they had kept his original personality, and wouldve shown ma vreedle as an actual villain rather than just a ruthlessly criminal mom Zombozo. he was fine in his debut episode but after that he became overused and his threat level slumped. also both of the circus eps are too similar and i dont like that they essentially reused the plot. hes also just so. boring. he has NO new tricks, no new schemes, no new powers, his design changed a little bit but that was it Liam. sorry but hes just too Comedic Background Villain and i dont like that he looks like a cartoon chicken Maltruant makes this list despite being a good villain and not one i actually dislike, but he was barely in the series and in the last episodes he felt overpowered and it infuriated me. i hate overpowered characters, they feel more like a maladaptive daydream than an actual character. so yeah. overall hes  Hex has never been a favourite, i just dont think hes interesting. hes decent in os but no THAT fun. also??? making gwen think hes hot? the FUCK. man of action i am BEGGING on my FUCKING KNEES Looma. yes shes hot but her entire arc was just her trying to marry ben. bad plot, barely any personality, no real threat whatsoever aside from wanting to marry ben. they offhandedly mention her conquering some city but like my dudes Just Show Us. Show Don’t Mention Once In A Line That Can Be Easily Forgotten Ultimate Kevin 11. decent concept, terrible execution, horrible ending to the plot Azmuth. im putting him on this list because hes a dicka dn also i dont like his characterization in uaf/ov and also becasue of what he did to albedo and malware

✏: Albedo. his entire story needs to go away i know what that frog needs and deserves and its Not That. also he only has like 9 eps? the fuck? give him more. make him bens asshole martial arts trainer whos smug whenever he beats ben and smug whenever ben wins because of what he taught him. the teams hacker/tech support whenever kevin cant or doesnt wanna do something or its just faster to go to him. the weird big brother whose apartment they all invade whenever they need advice or wanna hang out or just wanna get away from home and get some peace and quiet to read a book and do homework. make him cross and doublecross them several times and despite it all hes still stuck on earth and stuck as a human and despite betraying them they still come back to him even when theyre mad at him because the fate of the world and the universe is at stake and they need someone and max just isnt there. he doesnt understand why they come back. he wouldnt have. kevin does though. its lonely and its gotta suck being stuck in a body he doesnt want with noone who cares about him or where he is with a brain and emotions that work against him and make him misaligned with other people. make him someone ben can go to to bitch about azmuth and make him bitch to ben about azmuth and make him bens personal encyclopedia and the first guy he goes to when the omnitrix fucks up. make him gwens personal tutor who he bickers with because theyre both too smart and snotty for eachothers and their own goods, but dont let that stop him from helping gwen finish her homework or study more complex subjects or stop him from encouraging her to go further. she could go to any university if she wants to and there are options in space should she want them. ofc dont remove his narcissism or egomania or personality but give him a character arc and a found family and give him something better than just becoming a mini ben. Mad Ben as well. you cant just take a brutal, fearsome, angry, and plain cruel version of ben and give him no backstory aside from Lives In Desert and Matruant Mentored Him. WHERE is the backstory? i wanna see maltruant actually talking to him, i wanna know how he found the omnitrix and where max and gwen was, i wanna see how maltruant was training him, i wanna see how bellwood became benwood, i wanna see how rook - the upstanding citizen veryone cherises for being just and efficient - became the most cruel person in the universes underling. i wanna see him rise in ranks and see how much hurt he gives and creates before people learn not to fuck with him and i wanna see how much hurt he has to go through to get to where he is and how much it breaks or makes him to have everythng stripped away from him because his own worst enemy is himself and mini self, and how it affects him to not understand how or why, and how just a tiny little metal ring on his arm can destroy and halt all his had work and how hes planning on bouncing back and getting back at prime and 23 and everyone who betrayed him. and preferably hed have a redemption arc too and he has to undo all that grief he caused but he does it anyway because its worth it

#bean talk #ben 10 #ask meme #little-de-vil

[memoriashell]

seashells and shores ( and something a bit more )

Characters /  Pairing: Fukawa Touko / Naegi Komaru, ensemble class 78; varyingly background / implied ships are sakuraoi / ishimondo / celeschi / naeleogami

crossposted on ao3

Notes: a very late day 3 for @tokomaruweek​. beach prompt! yesterday i was feeling a little burnt out so i decided to not write since i didn’t want to put out something half assed. hopefully this being a bit longer helps make up for it! ( and by a bit, i mean i basically doubled the word count compared to what i’ve done for this week so far lmao rip so much for hoping i’d catch up tonight )

rated t for touko's trauma. and also for junko having her tits out. thanks junko.

anyways tw for like trauma, the general self-depricating / self-concious stuff for toko but also like. her trauma w/ water is brought up since it's. beach? and also drowning doesn't actually happen but it is brought up. and touko mentions claustrophobia in relation to her trauma offhandedly once, and again, just generally feeling insecure.

also it's kinda implied that chihiro and celes are both trans thank you!!!

Summary:  going to the beach isn't exactly an exciting thought for her, given the fact she has no desire getting in the water.

komaru seems dead set on making sure she makes some memories anyways.

Do you want to come to the beach with us? That is the first text of the morning that she receives, courtesy of Makoto Naegi. Touko considers asking who he means by us, gathers that he probably means some assortment of their classmates, and ( while it is very tempting to say yes ) concludes that she can safely say no. And she intends to do exactly that, but she gets a set of texts that stops her from being able to do so.

touko-chan!!!!

ur coming with us, right?

you should come with us!

itll be fun!

So Komaru would be there too— their...friendship is odd, all things considered. Not that the knowledge of knowing she’d be there makes the offer any more tempting, but she bites her lip and considers what to say. Not that there’s really much of a question, just keep it blunt and to the point as per usual. No point in sugar coating things.

I’m busy. Maybe next time. She’s not that busy, current manuscript aside. Not that Touko intended on ever not being busy. It’s not her fault that Komaru is too dense to take a hint.

awww :(

pls?

if u don’t wanna get in the water, ill make sure they’ll leave you alone. im sure you won’t be the only one that doesnt want to!!

Ah. She might have to ( partially ) retract her statement on Komaru being dense. Had she figured out her reluctance without her even mentioning it, or had that just been a lucky guess? Maybe it was just Makoto’s luck rubbing off on her...

i understand if you don’t want to come

and i’ll leave u alone if u rlly dont wanna come.

but it wont be as much fun without you there :(

Urgh. Yeah, this girl doesn’t understand a thing, does she? She’s probably not even realized the impact her words have on her. Touko grumbles under her breath, but figures she should respond before Komaru sends another text begging trying to convince her.

Fine.

I’m not going in the water, though.

If this goes horribly wrong, I’m blaming you.

That is a lie. Even if worst comes to worst and Syo feels the need to front for her, she won’t hold it against her. She’s the one who agreed, after all. It’s just one last attempt at offering her an out. To change her mind. Like she should. But Komaru is nothing if not stubborn, so she doesn’t really expect that offer to be taken up on. She starts making a mental checklist of what she probably needs to take with her, doesn’t get very far into that list because Komaru’s response is nearly instantaneous.

yayayayay tnk u touko-chan ily!!!!!! :D

we’ll pick u up k????

ur staying @ the place near the dorms right? see u soon!! ♡♡

Touko grimaces at the butchering of language that is Komaru’s texting ( and ignores her own fluttering heart upon seeing the casual hearts sprinkled in at the end ), and sends back, If you love me, fix your grammar.

The car ride over is mostly uneventful. In that she means she feels like she’s going to have a headache before they even get there and Makoto keeps giving her a sympathetic look. In other words, she’s learned that Komaru and both Asahina siblings should not be left to entertain themselves for the hour-long car ride, but the only silver lining here is that it was only an hour-long ride and hopefully they would be tired out for the ride back.

The highlight of the hour was that even if it’d been a tight squeeze in the backseat, that meant she’d been ( somewhat ) uncomfortably sandwiched between the door and Komaru herself. She’s a little surprised that it doesn’t set off her claustrophobia, but reckons that might just be because it’s too bright to remind her of being locked in a closet. And also because Komaru is generally distracting in close proximity, from the way she’d been halfway sitting on her lap, to the faint scent of what Touko figures to be her shampoo.

She also considers it a victory that she did not dissociate in the midst of that, but probably only because Komaru kept checking on her and apologizing for how close they are: she’d had to bite her tongue several times from saying something harsher than she’d really mean. She doesn't hate Syo, but probably counterintuitive to let them front today: whether they are aware of this, or simply just disinterested in trying to front right now, she is thankful. If nothing else, she would consider this some kind of learning moment. Maybe. Something to draw inspiration from?

Still, once she’s free from the confines of the car, she can actually relax a little— or does for all of two seconds before Komaru has grabbed onto her free hand and started dragging her towards the loud group that she recognizes as her class. Yuta and Aoi had bolted out of the car the moment they’d come to a stop to race to the waters ( she can’t imagine being that athletic and feels tired watching them ). Touko gazes back longingly at the confines of the car and the consideration that she might’ve been able to isolate herself there, but her grip’s pretty tight on her hand. Which is nice, and distracts her from thinking about escaping until it's way too late, and she’s forced to look at the group before her, and—

Slaps a hand over Komaru’s eyes with a groan. “Enoshima, wh-what the fuck, you—” She holds off on the ( derogatory ) word she wants to say, and just scowls at the sight before her. “This isn’t a...a nude beach? Are you t-t-trying to get us in trouble or something?” Granted she’s not technically completely nude, but also more revealing than she should be. Seriously, she would’ve figured that Ishimaru would’ve already told Enoshima off already because what else is he good for ( then again, he is single-handedly the only person who would probably take no real issue with it, or be naively convinced by her that it wasn’t really a problem, so maybe she really shouldn’t be that surprised ).

Enoshima cackles at her. “Don’t be a prude, Fukawa! Or are you jealous? I’m just trying to get a sick tan.” While she’s at it, where the hell is Ikusaba to keep her sister in check? Whatever, that’s not really important, and she refuses to dignify that with a response given that Enoshima probably only wants to get a rise out of her.

Instead, she makes sure to put a decent distance between them before removing her hand from over Komaru’s eyes with a huff. “Urgh, honestly...what on earth m-made her think that was a, a good idea?” She grumbles, glancing around now that she doesn’t have to stare directly at...that.

Actually, now that she looks around, the only seemingly responsible person from their class currently present was Oogami— and honestly, she seems too busy being in love with her girlfriend to count ( if it wasn’t kind of heartwarming, she’d probably be disgusted. Not in a homophobic way, in a general ew PDA sort of way ). As for any else viably responsible: Kirigiri being absent wasn’t a surprise, Fujisaki’s too soft to really keep people in check, Byakuya is...his own entirely separate category, and she would rather die than count Hagakure as responsible in any capacity. And Makoto might be a voice of reason, but she’s pretty sure he’s utterly useless here. Which is probably a horrible sign of things to come, but what else did she expect from anything involving her peers?

“You don’t want to go in the water, right?” Komaru’s voice cuts in through her thoughts, watching her closely before taking her hand to start pulling her along then. “We should set up somewhere to sit, then!”

We? She thinks, but instead attempts to free her hand from her grip and voices, “...Don’t you want to go in th-the water with the rest of them? You don’t have to, uh, to stay with me, you know. I’m not a k-k-kid.”

Her expression looks conflicted. “Well, yeah, of course I do want to! But only for a bit, probably? I mean, it’d be kind of rude to leave you alone since I asked you to come?”

She ignores the way her stomach twists at that, and purses her lips. “Technically s-speaking, Makoto asked first. You aren’t— it’s not rude of you to want...to want to have some fun without me. I know I’m n-n-not fun to stick around.” She knows she wouldn’t want to stick around herself if she had the choice. “It’s not like, like I wasn’t prepared for th-that.”

“Yeah, but— that’s the thing. You shouldn’t be! And I want to spend time with everyone, and that includes you too.” And now she’s sulking. God. Fukawa is about to growl back something she’ll probably regret saying, but is saved from doing so by a much calmer voice interrupting, having overheard their argument.

“Why don’t you go join your brother for a bit? Fukawa-san can join us if she would like to. We have an extra seat.”

Celes looks hot— and she means that in a very literal sense ( mostly ), decked out in one of her usual frilly black dresses. She looks out of place in the hot summer heat. Touko is also not sure where and how she managed to get a table out here ( and tea, apparently, and you know what she’s just not going to question it ), but Fujisaki is already pulling out the extra seat in offering, and she sighs reluctantly. Better this than feeling like she’s holding Komaru back.

“G-G-Go. Or...or I’ll let Syo toss you in the water.” Not really a threat - if anything, Syo would dive bomb into the water with her. Argh, maybe she should’ve just let them front today...

( No, no she shouldn’t have. The only person currently present that Syo would’ve mostly listened to would be Komaru— and maybe Makoto or Fujisaki if they were feeling generous— which is an entirely different set of issues she doesn’t want to linger on. Needless to say, she doesn’t particularly want Syo to cause chaos today )

Touko is saved from having to argue further with her on this because as Komaru opens her mouth to protest, Yuta comes to steal her away, blabbering on about something about a game they should play: and while he’s definitely as oblivious as his sister, she’ll consider that a good thing, just this once. The only words Komaru manages to get in is to ask Toko to keep her bag for her, which she would’ve done anyways, picking it up from where she’d dropped it. She watches them wander off ( and only looks away when Komaru starts discarding the clothes she’d been wearing over her swimsuit ) before trudging over to sit next to Fujisaki, who flashes her a small smile as she types away on her laptop.

“I am surprised you came, Fukawa-san. You do not seem like the type for these activities. You are usually quite disinterested in participating in these kinds of things, in fact. Did something change?” Ugh. This is why Touko hates being around Ludenberg. Because she’s observant, generally only bested by Kirigiri in that regard, and is generally good at picking people apart when it comes to lies and acts and fronts ( though Touko would argue this is from personal experience, and not from being a gambler ). And this fact would have irritated her, quite honestly, if she had not self-sabatoged herself by taking it as an insult, instead.

“I-I-I get it. No one really wants...wants me here. That’s what you meant, right...? You don’t have to r-remind me.” She grits her teeth. If nothing else, when she isn’t busy lying, Touko can appreciate her honesty. The tiny hand that wraps around her wrist stops her from saying anything further, even if it doesn’t take much to wrench her arm out of Fujisaki’s grasp: but she gets the feeling she is only able to do so because she isn’t actually trying to hold on too tightly.

“I’m sure th-that’s not what she meant, Fukawa-san...” Ever quick to play peacekeeper, she supposes. Touko simply grumbles at her and rolls her eyes. “...Especially since not everyone was available today, it’s nice that you were able to join us!”

“Yes, it is a shame. I would have liked for Yamada-kun to have been able to help with my tea, today.” Celes sighs as if disappointed— really? That’s what she’s on about?

Touko does a second look at who is not currently gathered, and denotes, “Is Maizono st-still out on tour...?” She thinks Komaru had mentioned something like that in passing.

“Yes! Maizono-san is on tour, Yamada-kun is at an important convention, Ikusaba-san, she’s...doing some kind of training...? I think Kirigiri-san is supposed to be on the tail end of a rough case, and...” Here Fujisaki pauses to giggle into her hand. “I sh-shouldn’t really laugh at this really, but Ishimaru-kun got sick. Oowada-kun had to force him to rest since he had been trying to work through it and made it worse for himself... or so that’s what I was told.”

Oh, so that’s the reason she hasn’t heard the loudmouths today? She might take back her sentiments on Ishimaru being useless, but he’s on thin fucking ice. Of course the overachiever would get sick during the summer holidays— apparently, she’s not alone in that thought.

“Only Ishimaru-kun would get sick during vacation and still manage to find a reason to not take a break.” Celes rolls her eyes, but Touko gets the feeling she’s amused too.

“So wh-what you’re saying is, uh, is that Oowada’s going to get sick next...right? I guess— we’ll find out if idiots get s-s-sick or not.” Touko quips— which earns a softer laugh from Fujisaki, so that’s pretty good.

Of course, it wouldn’t be like her if she didn’t put her foot in her mouth almost immediately afterwards by asking why they aren’t going in the water: she’s not really surprised because Celes rarely participates in gym ( and coming from Touko that says a lot ), but she was pretty sure Fujisaki wasn’t that self-conscious of herself. Not as much? Not that she really has any place to talk in that regard.

“Well, we already went to the beach at the start of the summer holidays! I’m not really missing out on anything, and it’s probably not my last opportunity to go during this break anyways.” And then, a little more sheepishly. “...Also I’m close to making a breakthrough on this code, I think. I wanted the fresh air, but I don’t really think I can afford to take much of a break right now.”

“She would have stayed on the train if I did not warn her we were approaching our stop, I believe. And not all of us can be like Enoshima. The brazenness of that woman is truly something else.” Touko is not sure if she says that from a place of respect or fear, and honestly she relates. And also doesn’t say any further on the subject because Celes gives her a dirty look.

Her gaze goes back out to their peers— she is pointedly avoiding needing to look at where Enoshima is— and spots Komaru and Yuta splashing around with Aoi and Oogami. Well, it looks like just splashing at least, from where she’s at. And Hagakure, who really just looks like an out-of-place sea cretin with the way his hair floats on the water’s surface, so. There’s that?

( No, she’s not at all envious of the fact that all of them get to have fun because they don’t have crippling fears: the ocean does not instill the same fear of confinement that a cramped bathtub does, but fear— there is still the fear that something will tug her down and her body will simply let herself dragged underneath out of instinct, a fear of something worse if she tries to fight for survival— )

Focus. She can feel the way her breath catches a little, the uneasy way her heart beats and concentrates on calming down. She doesn’t seem to have gotten Syo’s attention yet, nor anyone else’s, thankfully. She’ll just...watch Komaru for now, yeah. It takes a moment to relocate her, head breaching from underneath the water and surfacing like...like one of the sea’s legendary enchantresses. She means that in a wholly respectful way, of course, watching the way she shakes the water from her hair, mouth open in a wide grin while she laughs. Touko doesn’t need to hear her to know that on the sole basis of her appearance— the bright look in her eyes is enough to say she is happily enjoying herself without her.

On that note, hm. Maybe she can use some of that for the basis of her next novel— something about a siren and a lady visiting the sea? Tragic romances are always a hit, aren’t they? Okay maybe a tragic lesbian romance is more self-projection, but that's besides the point. No one has to know its self-projection if people eat it up like anything else that has her name on it.

Or maybe you need to talk to a therapist more often? Syo contributes helpfully, apparently having become more conscious at some point. Maybe her panic hadn’t gone as unnoticed as she thought. Not that they’re wrong, but talking to a therapist isn’t exactly going to help with her gay pining ( unfortunately, she wishes it were that simple ).

Yeah, that’s not something she really wants to linger on, and as if Celes can read her mind, says, “How do you ladies feel about a bet?”

“Pass.” Touko says immediately, because she is arguably far from a smart person, but she is smart enough to know to not take her chances against the ultimate gambler. Celes ignores her.

“You see, I would bet that Komaru—”

“No. We’re leaving h-her out of it.” Toko interrupts, and Fujisaki ( thankfully, like the god sent angel she is, even if she seems too good to be real ) nods her agreement.

“I don’t think Naegi-kun would be really happy if he heard us talking about his little sister like that...” Her reasoning is fair, if nothing else.

“Fine. Do you think Naegi-kun is going to interfere on Togami-kun’s behalf, or help Kuwata-kun?” A painted fingernail points out the trio by the sea. Kuwata seems pretty intent on forcing Togami into the sea, suit and all, much to his disdain. The duo is yelling, probably. On the other hand, Makoto just looks like he doesn’t know whose side he’s supposed to be on here.

In the end, it doesn’t matter because by some luck ( or lack thereof ) Togami manages to trip on a washed up stone and ends up taking the other two boys down with him. The heir doesn’t even look all that mad, really, as Kuwata dunks him back under the water in retaliation: she knows what his angry face is, and that is not it, even if it looks kind of like he’s swallowing a lemon.

Or maybe that’s just her and her sour mood feeling like she’s swallowed several lemons raw because Touko doesn’t know how to make lemonade out of all the citrus life has handed her.

“By the way Fukawa-san, about Komaru—” Celes starts, but is interrupted by Komaru’s sharp yelling, which is followed by the wet feeling of her arms wrapping around her. Touko frowns, pushing her away.

“You’re w-wet.” She states the obvious as she makes a face, not that that seems to stop her. “Are you...you're done going in the water f-f-for now?”

“Mhm! It’s too cold in the water, honestly. You’re nice and warm.” Komaru hums happily, and she grabs a towel from her bag to wrap her up in it before she ends up being the next sick kid. “I was thinking we could maybe spilt a snack...? And then we could make a sandcastle! Asahina-san was telling me about shells she saw earlier that we could use?” Touko bites back a small snort at how childish she sounds.

“Yeah, yeah— let go of me, s-so I can get up...” She agrees, ignoring the curious way Celes’ watches their interactions. She mutters something that passes for a thanks before she leaves ( not that she thinks Fujisaki notices at that point, full enraptured by her laptop screen ).

By snack, Touko realizes that this is more of a way of making sure she eats lunch— Syo had not so accidentally let it slip once that when she gets caught up on things, she has the tendency to skip meals. She bites her tongue on saying that it wasn’t necessary and instead pays for their meal because she can do that, she has the money to spare for that kind of thing: and she knows she doesn’t need to, but sometimes she feels like she needs to make it up to her before Komaru gets sick of their friendship.

And if it comes off like a date, that’s simply just coincidence.

When they return to the shore, Komaru drags her off to an area a little more secluded— she doesn’t really realize this at first, simply accepting her fate to follow along, but notices she can’t really hear anyone else. It helps her relax, feel like she doesn’t need to be so guarded.

( It doesn’t stop Touko from briefly complaining about how sandy she’s going to get because of this, which is annoying. And then immediately shuts up because Komaru offers to let her borrow her clothes, and she has nothing coherent that she can say to that. She eventually manages to spit out a no when it becomes obvious Komaru is waiting for her to say something )

“Well, okay then. You can always let me know if you change your mind.” She says, then, “Oooh, Touko-chan! It looks like there are tide pools over here!”

Komaru leaves her to pick out shells for them to use while she does the dirty work of constructing a sand castle. “So you won’t end up too sandy,” she explains. “And I trust your eyes to pick out nice shells.” She can’t really complain— although she almost makes a scathing comment about the fact that her eyes can't really be trusted when she wears glasses— and just keeps away from the waves for the most part. The water laps at her feet while she lingers around the tide pool, and then returns with the fruits of her search.

It’s...not an awfully constructed sand castle. Well, that’s probably more than a little generous to say. You know, if she was going to compare it to something kids made. As it stands ( or doesn’t, if Touko is being honest ), it’s probably not the most...concretely built and looks like part of the base might fall apart at any moment, but doesn’t say anything as she dumps an assortment of shells at her feet. And then pulls out a towel, so she can sit and watch her work. It feels like there’s another problem with this, but she can’t quite place what it is; it’s probably not important enough to point out.

Going back to the novel idea: maybe it’s not about a siren after all. Maybe it’s about a sea princess instead. A lonely girl drowning in the waters called home, in a lonely castle, and—

“Here you go!” Komaru plops a shell into her hand with no warning and beams at her. “It’s nice and pretty just like you, Touko-chan. So you should keep it!”

She definitely doesn’t almost tear up upon hearing that, swallowing thickly as she bites back a self-deprecating, Are you sure it’s not just ugly like me? Instead, she picks out a small shell from the pile and holds it out to her.

“...H-H-Here. Completely plain and, and average like you.” And cute, but that’s not important. Still, Komaru looks like she’s actually said something of worth as she throws her arms around her neck.

“Thank you! I’ll take good care of it.” She acts like she’s given her a houseplant or something of actual value, and not a shell.

Stiffly— because she still really doesn’t know how to respond in these kinds of moments, despite being friends for a few odd months now— Touko pats her back and mutters, “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“It is!” Komaru pouts at her. “It is to me. Isn’t that enough?”

She opens her mouth to point out that she’d really just been reciprocating a gesture, but the wave crashing over them interrupts the conversation— oh yeah, she thinks absently. That’d been the other problem that she’d noticed when Komaru had started building, but hadn’t thought it was a big enough issue to point out.

Once she processes that yes, that happens, her first thought is how cold she is now, soaked to the bone. Touko represses a shudder and tries to ignore the fact that she will need to shower later because salt water gets itchy. The second thing that occurs to her, in the midst of this, is that now Komaru is wailing into her shoulder.

“I should’ve been more careful, I’m sorry Touko-chan! You’re okay? You aren’t upset, are you? I thought th—” Touko leans forward to cut her off. Her lips taste like salt, and vaguely reminiscent of the sweet snack Komaru had coaxed her into splitting. She wants to bite down on her lip, a nervous habit, and pulls back before she can accidentally manage to bite the other’s lips instead. The implications of that are a lot more than she’s willing to handle right now, and averts her gaze as soon as she leans back, so she does not have to acknowledge her actions.

That doesn’t stop Komaru from throwing her arms around her a little too eagerly, a grunt at the impact of their bodies colliding. “Too m-much.” Touko manages to wheeze out, and before she can start apologizing again, follows with, “I’m not upset. I should probably just...just buy something overpriced from one of th-the nearby shops since our clothes are soaked now...”

She takes this in fairly good stride, jumping to her feet and pulling her up by her hands. “Can I pick out an outfit for you? It’ll be fun!”

Their ideas of fun are very different quite frankly, but considering Komaru won’t overthink her appearance like she does, thus meaning it’ll be more time efficient. And quite frankly, she’s tired, so she just agrees. On the condition they can just go take a nap in the car afterwards.

Touko doesn’t quite agree with Komaru’s fashion choices, but she picks out clothes that cover up everything that needs to be hidden, so she can’t exactly complain. Nor does she complain when they do less napping and more snuggling in the backseat. Which means on the ride back, Komaru ends up falling asleep on her shoulder. She thinks about how pretty she looks in the light of the sunset.

Maybe she can rethink her next novel being a romantic tragedy.

#tokomaru week 2021 #toukomaru #tokomaru #komaru naegi #toko fukawa #touko fukawa #danganronpa #* zhi writes

[clumsyclifford]

just finished writing this and realized how long it got oh jeez i am so sorry. i promise it is just me rambling about nothing and does not require a lot of thought.

i made a playlist of r5's entire discography and am listening to it (in order) because there is something wrong with me. if only it had their very first ever ep on it (ready set rock ep you may have been slight garbage but i don't love you any less for it). oh god i realized i fucked up and didn't add the songs by "ross lynch and r5" from the austin & ally soundtrack. i'm already three songs into louder and they would have been between louder and say you'll stay. what do i have to do is actually one of r5's best songs and i'm pretty sure i remember ross calling it one of his favs fairly recently?? which was so valid of him. anyways. this is now an r5 song ranking. i'm bored and avoiding doing assignments. i'm going to name my top 10 r5 songs off the top of my head. source: me trying to remember every song they've ever released.

no. 1: easy love. nothing comes close. my fav song they ever made. they haven't made anything that even compares since (this is /hj. tde has some valid songs).

no. 2: wishing i was 23. what do you mean i only love this song because of my nostalgia bias no i don't.

no. 3: what do i have to do? i will not elaborate i do not know why i adore this song as much as i do it's just a cute song.

no. 4: repeating days. THE END. THE FUCKING END AFTER THE SONG ENDS THE "all i've got is cheap wine" PART ross sounds so vulnerable and him with just the guitar makes me so :(((((( it's so gorgeous that part makes the whole song and that makes it top 3 for me.

no. 5: i want u bad. THAT SONG FUCKS LIVE. I DO NOT WANT TO THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT I WILL PROBABLY NEVER SEE IT LIVE AGAIN. (speaking of concerts i can't believe you bought concert tix and fucking forgot??? that is actually so fucking funny bella it made me laugh i will not lie)

no. 6: dark side. so so valid of them. it just fucks. it's so good. it makes u want to dance. u named a fic after a lyric from it which was so valid.

no. 7: did you have your fun? i love this song. no i will not elaborate. it is a sexy song. what's that one lyric from it that's hot. "love me, leave me, left me numb" some lyrics you love for no particular reason and for me that's one of those lyrics.

no. 8: f.e.e.l.g.o.o.d. this has alwayysss been one of my favs by them. since it dropped. some lore about it: the like crowd yelling that's in it they recorded live at a festival they played and i remember there being hype about this being an unreleased song when they had the crowd chanting "f-e-e-l-g-o-o-d" with no explanation. also another fun fact is that the final version of this is just a demo?? source: my slightly faulty memory remembering ross saying something about some demos being so good that you keep them as they are and it later being revealed this was the song he was talking about.

no. 9: i know you got away. sexy song. they released a vocals only version of it (that has apparently since been deleted?? i went to look for it on youtube and couldn't find it?? wtf r5) that has stuck with me ever since.

no. 10: loud. but more specifically the acoustic or live version. this was their encore song that they played to end every show. i MISS IT. it holds a special place in my heart.

honorable mentions: hurts good (a good song and THEIR LAST THEY EVER RELEASED VV SAD), wild hearts (fun fact almost picked a lyric from this song as my senior quote till i found out they didn't write this song), fallin' for you (YOU LIKE MISMATCHED SOCKS WITH POLKA DOTS YOU LIKE YOUR PIZZA COLD I THINK THATS HOT i never saw this song live and i'm still fucking pissed about it ok), do it again (it's such a sweet song :(((( "listen to the airplanes as we count the stars" gives me the same vibes as six feet under the stars), things are looking up (generally just a cute song!! this whole ep is just very good and very cute!! when i saw it live one time during the bridge ross was like "everyone shut up this is my favorite part >:(" and that was so valid of him) i can't say i'm in love (it's just a fun song!! it was a bonus track on sln from another country), trading time (this is the only song from the new addictions ep that i listed and u know what i'm Not sorry)

ok. i will spare you and stop rambling. other honorable mentions: if you have never listened to cool girl (feat. the driver era) by new beat fund i highly recommend. it's an okay song but it was one of the first songs released after they rebranded as tde and includes ross saying motherfucker with his whole chest. i will never again feel what i felt the first time i heard that song having listened exclusively to them as r5 whose songs they couldn't curse in because they were on a disney label.

in conclusion. i miss r5. ross saying fuck is kinda hot. i listened to the entirety of louder while writing this. i am sorry to dump this in your askbox. i still have multiple assignments to do and should probably go to sleep at a decent time. it feels fitting to finally stop writing while easy love is on. when i was 12 and this ep came out i thought "dirtbags" was a curse word and was scared to sing it. they changed it to "douchebags" live.

that's all. goodbye. have a lovely night. listen to r5's discography for clear skin thriving crops etc etc. sorry to lovepost about them in your askbox i only have (1) former r5 mutual that i still talk to (a very interesting but long story. she's the gemini bestie) and she will only lovepost about r5 once in a while. feel free to ignore my ask calling cody bellinger hot i was a different person when i wrote it i am now a changed woman. LOVE YOU MWAH - bella but she misses r5

hi hi im going to answer this with minimal thought because im tired but i dont wanna leave this sitting in my inbox forever but for the record all your r5 opinions are valid. ok lets go

1. easy love slaps ive heard it a couple times over the last few days (it played in the car today while i was driving sam n meghna to the airport) and it does fuck i can see why it's your fave

2. i do not know this song

3. A BOP A WHOLE FUCKIN BOP

4. oh i do love repeating days great choice i would have to hear it a few more times to get it in my head but i remember really liking it when i listened to the album it's on

5. also a banger and i'm glad my concert tickets situation made you laugh it made me laugh too imagine being this useless gldskfjgs

6. DARK SIDE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS GIVE IN TO YOUR DARK SIDE YOUR DARK SIDE IIIIIIIII SEE THE WAY YOU LOOK AT MEEEEE

7. ANOTHER FUCKING BANGER this one is probably among my favorite r5 songs maybe top 5 LOVE ME LEAVE ME LEFT ME NUMB (guitar moment) DID YOU HAVE YOUR FUUUuuuuUUUUUNNNNN i feel the same way about this lyric as you

8. oh shit thats pretty cool i dont know this song tbh i cant remember how it goes i know ive heard it once or twice but. id have to listen to it again so i will keep you posted on that

9. i do not know this one either

10. interesting choice for top ten but i support you, this song fucks and ever since you mentioned it it's been in my subconscious and randomly getting stuck in my head i think i need to listen to it to get it out. it does hit ur right

11. i don't know hurts good or wild hearts or things are looking up or i can't say i'm in love or trading time well enough to say anything about them. but i really like fallin for you it's one of those cheap fun songs but emphasis on fun, and also really like do it again one day ill write a fic based on that song

i have not listened to cool girl i put it on my to listen playlist so hopefully i remember to listen to it soon ill be honest though i dont think im prepared for ross lynch saying motherfucker w his whole chest like i think itll take me out. so. anyway. i hope you got your assignments done. thank you for the r5 lovedump feel free to drop in anytime with more

#this is a love-positive zone #we love love #here on clumsyclifford we support insane obsessions because we also have insane obsessions #ask #cubs anon #anonymous #lol i was telling my dad that i talked to rian and zack but said the most generic things ever #and i was like. i mean there were things that i would have wanted to ask but if i had then they would have known that-- #-- im like super obsessed with them in a kind of creepy way. like i wanted to ask rian what time alex was born #...so we can figure out his rising sign so we can make his star chart #and my dad was like . why would you need that #and i said. you know for funsies #he was like do you think he would even know that #and i said well in our collective opinions we think alex wouldnt know what time he was born but rian and/or jack probably would #and my dad was like its a good thing you didnt ask him that. it would have been creepy. #and i was like I KNOW THATS WHY I DIDNT ASK BECAUSE I KNEW IT WOULD HAVE BEEN CREEPY BRO #so anyway #i dont remember why i started telling this story #its 1am im so tired ive had the longest two days ever #i need sleep im going to die #i cant believe classes in two days #end me

[uwuowotf2waslife]

Do you have one with crippling depression yet? Like they stop eating, stop moving, always nearing tears but bottles them up, becomes emotionally numb, not really finding the joy in life in anyway? There’s nothing physical that caused it, it’s just isolation, loneliness, or guilty memories catching up with you. I’m uh, not doing so good right now and your writing is a really good pick-me-up. Can you write it? Please? It’s fine if it’s too triggering, I can understand. Have a good day, or night.

My inbox is always open my dude, and im more than thankfull for your words

(this will be about a merc and a S/O, hmu if you meant about team dynamics)

You are poetry, 

stay safe & hydratated

tw: depression

Scout: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ not the most emotional mature of the mercs; even himself admits that he is pretty immature even for his age (early 20s), but this doesn’t means he doesn’t have empathy or that he doesn’t care about his S/O. He sees you suffering and he is big time worried. He tries to motivate you, drag you out of your bed and do something fun or at least go and buy some food. He will get annoying but he can’t just sit there and watch you rot. He is a hands-on guy, he might not understand why you are acting up like this, but at the same time he doesnt know how he can approach you. He will try to hug you tighter and bring you food and water, his shoulders can be a pillow for you to cry all day and night long and his hands are there to wipe off the tears from your face. He hates seeing his bby sad and would give half his Tom Jones memorabilia for you to wake up one day and be your old, happier self ♥

Soldier: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ although his social skills are in scarcity, he isnt a traitor. He sees his S/O down ( mentally) and it pains him to an unimaginable extent  to see you so unmotivated . He doesn't understand why are you sad, what has happened? Did that crazy Kraut touched you? who he needs to snap the neck? He hates seeing you like this. Will be stubborn, just because he doesnt understand something it doesnt mean he can't find a way around. In the end, he will push you enough to actually break down and explain everything that has happened. For the first time in years hes just silent, he broke the dam and he is beyond ashamed of making you break down like this. He doesn't what to do so for now he will hold you as tight as he can and promise in America and whatever is holy and pure in him that he will help you untill you are again okay. ♥

Pyro: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ they know that you are sadder than before and they can see you points of view. They themselves know that life sometimes just sucks and that its okay not to want to eat or leave your bed. But they are also afraid that whatever is plaguing you it will become worse and worse and they really don’t want to see you hurting yourself like they once did. They try helping you do simple things, drink a glass of water, play a bit with their stuffed animals, theyll help you brush your hair or wash your face. They know they baby you, but they think you need a bit more of some more smootches or cuddles. If they see you worsening or being even less active they will drag you their pillowfort and just try to keep you as close them while chanting sweet nothings and sad mumbles, please don’t loose yourself like they did. ♥

Engie: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ he might be a cruel, cold man when hes on the field, but in reallity he is the cinnamon roll meme( he is a cinnamon roll and he might kill you tho but he is mostly a cinammon roll). He knows also that work and his projects take a really big amount of his time so he already feels very guilty. I doubt he has any humanitarian doctorates, but he has an above average understanding of human psychology; whats the point of trying  to emulate life when you cant understand it?He knows he can't address it straightforward, but he needs to get you over this slump before you do something really stupid. Que him cleaning up his workshop and carrying you there bridal style. He has a small nest of pillows and blankets and right next to it his trusted guitar.You have the whole night and the day after to spend it together and get in the bottom of the barrel. Itll be hectic but he is a very patient man and loves ya to bits ♥

Demo: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ lowkey one of the mercs with the most expierence with depression/ depressive episodes. For once in his life he doesnt drink and tries to find the rute of the problem, if there is of course or its just pent up anger and frustation with things that have happened in your life now or in the present. In simple, you will talk. For hours if needed. He wont drink a sip becausehe doesnt want to forget even the stupidest detail from your venting. In the end, he will offer you to drink but he will drag you out of the base/ house and make you sit in the front porch/ garden  while he has set up some “ festive” fireworks ( just some small ones that erupt and turn into hearts) . He isnt the ideal psychological perfection, but if you chosed the scottish cyclops for your mate, then he shall go to the man and back just to see you smile one more time. ♥

Heavy: ˜”*°•.˜”*°• he has seen depression and has experienced it himself. It was way too traumatic for a young man to have to support a family without a father figure around. I highly headcanon him to have deppresion hence the sandwich, hes bingining while staying in the battlefield. He doesnt care about the language barrier, in order for the both of you to be as close as you are know, it means you understand eachother to a satysfying extent. He will cook you a very hearty meal and bring it to your bed with a tray and sweet tea. You can eat in silence with him simply staying by your side and rub your back, words can’t potray how he feels right now. Once you finished hell put the dishes outside and simply cuddle you ( being the least cuddly of the mercs, it means a lot). You can nap, cry, trace patterns on his sculp anything really. All his life the main cause of depression was the anarchy surrounding his life, he needs you to feel protected. He doesn’tcare how much time it will take, but he will rip the mountains apart to seeyou smile out of genuine happiness, might even cry if he is the cause. •°*”˜.•°*”˜

Medic: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ the most medically, again qualified from the group. so he has at least that covered. He isn’t stupid, you show clear signs of cronic clinical depression ( also known as manic depression) and although it has been a long while before finding a patient to lobotomize, hed be damned if he ever butchered you up like that. He is a healer, even if enjoys his enemies to hurt a little more than they should, and a healer is here to help both the body and the mind. Will persuade you into getting under medication, even if he knows theyll have little to no effecthe just hopes the placebo effect will motivate you. He tries to mix your routine with his, ex. he wakes up really early when you finnaly after hours of insomnia fell asleep, hell tuck you in and kiss your forehead. Throughout the day hell send Scout or Heavy to bring you food or water or your medications. Pyro will be by your doorstep or you side, to keep you company during the day. At night he will carry you to the medbay and do all the talking for you if you dont feel like talking, he will listen to all of your venting. Lowkey will sit you on his lap so he can rub your back and let you cry/ just sit there, to feel his heardbeat on your face and relax. ♥

Sniper: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥    𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘯, 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘰𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵. 𝘉𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘈𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘯𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘶𝘱 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘩𝘪𝘮, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘶𝘭𝘵 , 𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥, 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 , 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥. 𝘏𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘧𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘥, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘴𝘯𝘵 𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦. 𝘖𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘈𝘥𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘳, 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘣𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘤 ( 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘥𝘴), 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘚/𝘖 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦. 𝘏𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵( 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘱𝘪𝘴𝘴 , 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥 0/10 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘥) 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘶𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴 𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘬. 𝘏𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘱 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘢 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘳, 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘶𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦. 𝘏𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦, 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘯𝘰𝘸. ♥

Spy: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥     actually he isn’t that mentally mature as much as he strives to be. He has very unhealthy copying mechanisms, he fucks and smokes his torments away, but he also knows different people have different copying mechanism and he cant judge how people seek comfort. He doesnt know how to help yo, he really does but he doesnt know. He is nervous but he will probably suggest you two take a vacation away, together. He has planned it all fancy and nice, and pretty much has scanned the whole place/ area/resort you are staying and having “ friends” around. He doesnt care if you just stay all day in the resorts pool and just chill around drinking pina coladas. In the middle of your vacations, he will take you to a more secluded area and will open up about his issues , not about your relationship but about him as a person. He has many issues and he is a very difficult person to be around, so you haveto know he will never judge you. But he also doesnt know how to help you. This will make you hug him and you two can finnaly have a good, well-earned cry. Kiss him on the nose or on his head and tell him how much all this means to you and he will cry you a river and hold you till the dayhe dies, how can someone so late in his life means so, just so damn much? ♥  

#tf2 #tf2 x reader #tf2 imagines #mental health #comfort #tf2 headcanons

[irkenheretic]

okay i promised id do it and im doing it: Explaining The Plot Of That AU I’m Vague About: The Post

(as i was preparing to write this i actually got my 250th follower, which slapped)

so i’m just gonna start with the simple version, which is this: it’s a rebel AU which primarily centers around the tallest, who are both defective. they give up on trying to make any meaningful changes as figureheads, and instead direct their attention to being involved with the “neo defect revolution,” or NDR. they do manage to make one change as tallest- there is a garbage dump planet turned into a sanctuary for defectives (who in this au are executed once discovered,) and eventually enough of the populace finds out about it that the tallest have to deal with it. they finesse their way into kicking it out of the empire, so now it’s its own planet with its own rules, governments, and most importantly, immigration policies and protections

a lot of stuff happens and it’s gonna be structured using arcs, and each arc has a separate protagonist/deuteragonist/tritagonist lineup (but that doesnt mean the same lineup won’t be used multiple times!) and yes the insane list of OCs are for this au alone: some arcs are very OC-centric, some have OCs as supporting characters, and a couple are all-OC or mostly-OC. 

its going to be very longform and it’ll span from the tallest’s elite training days to twenty years after zim arrives on earth. (the 20 year gap btwn zim arriving on earth and the story proper isnt as tightly plotted as later tho.) the point is to see how a revolution on the scale of the NDR works, who was fucked over by defact laws, who was fucked over by other laws, etc. theres a lot of lore and a lot of headcanons i made for this AU and even a conlang. i am a being of hubris. itll be a series of fics, some multichapter and some oneshots. 

the series as a whole is gonna be called Invader Zim: Annexed or just Annexed for short. its a pun on an irken word that sounds similar but means the exact opposite. i am not explaining more bc itll be explained in the fic itself. but thats why the tag for it is #anx lmao

i didnt mean for this to be as long as it got but under the cut im gonna breakdown some of the early arcs:

so it all starts with a fanfic called Love Is The H-Word (no the “h-word” isn’t “hell.) it centers around red and purple as elites-in-training, who do a little whoopsie and have an egg. purple doesnt wanna smuggle it into a smeetery, bc then he’ll never see it again, so they go to the defect sanctuary (still a part of the empire at this point.) purple knows he’s defective while red has a hard time accepting that he is as well, due to events from his past. but being around all these other defects are starting to wear down his denial, and the fic is all about that. it also sets up some plot stuff, like how defects adopted a self-identifier in the word “heretic,” hence the sanctuary being named, “heretirk.” (hey look my url!) (no, the “h-word” is not heretic, either.) 

i dont wanna say what happens in that fic bc spoilers, but stuff Happens. its also when we meet some ocs that end up being important, and the existence of others are foreshadowed. this is also where we meet the tallests’ future advisor, rarl kove, for the first time, as a local who decides to keep them company. purple bonds with kove due to their shared interest in politics, while red reluctantly bonds with titch, a young irken (a smeet in heretirken standards, an adult in imperial standards- did i mention he and red are roughly the same age? lol) who is interested in military stuff and thrill-seeking and general destruction. titch is pissed because he claims his father is stealthing on devastis as a military commander, but won’t let titch sneak in as a soldier, as titch is deaf. 

(fun facts: in the au, “titch” is regional slang for “a little bit.” ironically, titch the character is above-average in height.)

due to titch’s deafness, he developed “gesturespeak,” irken sign language, so he can communicate. this existing becomes important later

a oneshot called invade the system is right after h-word in publishing order. it details zim’s exploits in leaving foodcourtia, where he was assigned and infiltrating the invading academy he eventually graduates from (in this au, zim is too short to be an invader, which sucks because the hight minimums for the military are really short to begin with lmao)

the fic chronoligically after H-Word focuses on red and purple being back in their platoon on devastis, specifically red navigating his training and his relationships with two defective platoonmates, pon and zi (who are in h-word a little,) after the realization that he too is defective. it also focuses on how the irken military works, and how they train their soldiers. 

the first arc overall focuses on red and purple going thru training and such, and ends after they graduate and are on the field, working to get commander rank. (they planned to gain commander rank then leave and go back to heretirk to train an army there, as heretirk has.... no army.) in the middle of this, they’re pulled out and told they are to become the next tallest. they debate over staying and taking the job or just running to heretirk, and they ultimately decide to stay.

the next arc i call the “bridge,” tbh. its less tightly plotted than the other arcs; fics are spread apart from each other chronologically and all that. it spans the time after the tallest being appointed to a little after zim arrives on earth. it also has a couple of anthologies focusing on imperial defects- each chapter is a new character. these guys are all important and the easiest way for me to introduce their backstories without cluttering everything up is anthology style, lmao. other things that happen are a look into how the tallest work, eventually culminating with the resolution of the tallest having to Deal With Heretirk, tenn’s rescue from meekrob, and zim on earth obtaining a half-irken smeet named pip due to stealing an Unethical Science Experiment from dib (which is pip.) the bridge is basically just. “heres some stuff that happens between point A and point B so when we get to point B you’re not confused as all hell.” 

the next arc focuses on zim. in the first fic, pip is sick and zim is trying to get into his neighbor’s pants, to cope. this basically sets up that zim in this au has no idea how to find personal fulfillment in living- he’s only OK if he focuses on pleasing someone else, be it taking care of pip or doting on the neighbor, some rando human named piqu (pronounced, “peek.”) this is mainly a cute romance story with the underlying veneer of “a child is slowly and painfully dying” in the background. fun! 

without spoiling the circumstances, zim and pip end up on heretirk, which at this point is its own independent planet. pip is in the hospital for most of it so zim has to do his own thing. computer fans rejoice bc hes basically zims dad at this point, who tells him to go outside and get some fresh air and talk to the locals instead of schmooping or screaming in anxiety. im sneakily introducing more characters like ini, the “next-gen zim;” a short bio-engineer (she works on PAKs) who was constantly passed over by everyone because they dont trust someone that short or they dont trust someone that spazzy, even though shes actually brilliant. also her brother mo, who’s a pilot that NOBODY will teach military-class ships to (at this point, HTK has a population of ex-military that had their old ships, but still no formal army) because he doesnt talk and they think hes “slow” as a result. for the curious, he is physically able to talk most times, he just doesnt like it. zim ends up teaching him how to fly military-class which ends up being important laterrr

(haha ini and mo. wheres meenie and minie? ILL GET TO THEM)

no really, theyre quadruplets. named ini, myni, minie, and mo. these are real characters. 

minie isnt introduced till later. shes too cool to be the side character in someone elses arc. she is feel uncomfortable when we are not about her.

myni is busy palling around with pip and pip’s friend “elly” (real name elevenn, with two N’s.) elly is a half-meekrob War Crime Baby and tenn’s smeet. he has vision problems (he can “see” energy signatures of things, as opposed to conventional sight. everything is monochrome and he has to really focus to see like, words on a paper. also fuck tablets) but the trade-up is telekinetic powers (that he cant use too much or his brain will melt. fun!) this isnt relevant until the arc AFTER zim’s, where they end up poking around a historical site due to myni’s interest in that kind of thing, and they find logs of an old revolution (that was actually pretty successful in their goal, before they were caught and executed,) that lead them to a man named lefy. he helps with revolutions and helped these guys, and the trio go to seek him out; myni because he wants to impress his parents with helping them, pip because after they’ve recovered enough to walk around and do stuff, feel like they need to justify the choice to save their life and make their dad proud and all that, elly because he doesnt want pip to get hurt and die. And thats where the stuff REALLY starts happening and i cant tell u more sorry

this seemed kind of disjointed but thats bc i cant really be too detailed otherwise id like.... spoil it lmfao. but thats the summary of the first few arcs.

#*falls over and dies* my poor hands and fingeys #yall better mf read this..... #ill post a fic later today or maybe tomorrow #its being betad rn #take this lol! i finally explain myself #for those of you on mobile i am SO sorry #this is fine to rb in case ur wondering. dk why u would wanna but its chill #anarchisma au #live from conventia #long post

[hydra-collector]

Let Me Go: Chapter 9

AO3 Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8

Pairings: Intrulogical, Roceit

Characters: Logan Sanders, Remus Sanders, Janus Sanders, Roman Sanders, Virgil Sanders

TW: food, fire mention

Words: 1155

Summary: truth or dare?

Note: I finished it. I feel bad for the two people that I saw keeping up with it. I appreciate you guys. Also (I doubt anyone would want to be on it) I’d start a taglist if y’all asked 👀

Class was dull, the teacher boring an already uninteresting topic. Remus and Logan paid attention as much as they had to.

“Do we even need to do anything? They already know they like each other.”

“Trust me, my brother isn’t going to ask them out easily. We need to get Janus to do it.”

“Every time I’ve talked to them about it, they get pretty defensive.”

“We could invite them both somewhere and leave them alone together.”

“Not sure Roman’s smart enough not to run away.”

“We could always play truth or dare with one of them until they pick dare. Roman never goes back on a dare.”

“Remus… that is the most childish way to get them to go on a date. Let’s do it.”

Remus grinned their most adorable grin.

chaos twin: virgil wanna join in on our scheme

aro emo: depends what it is

chaos twin: we’re gonna get roman or janus to ask each other out

aro emo: i dont really care

aro emo: but it sounds fun

chaos twin: just play truth or dare with us after school

aro emo: ,,,truth or dare

chaos twin: itll work, we're gonna dare one of them to ask the other out

“The plan is, we go to your house, invite them over, make popcorn, and when they get there we watch something like a movie, and once it’s pretty late we play truth or dare. They’ll be tired and incoherent and won’t think about their decisions.”

They headed towards Logan’s house, Remus pushing him so he didn’t have to use his arms so much.

“Is the popcorn a necessary addition? It’s very unhealthy.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Also, Janus has not picked truth once in his life. I don’t think we’ll have a problem with daring him.”

“He’s good at talking his way out of stuff, though. I think Roman’s the better option. That also means we’ll get to play for longer before he throws a tantrum about our dare or Janus takes it.”

Remus kicked their shoes off when they got to Logan’s house, waving to their boyfriend’s mom as they hopped inside.

“Should I contact them now?”

Remus nodded and he sent three quick messages to Roman, Janus, and Virgil before following them inside. They pulled him into a mock-dance, spinning his wheelchair.

“We might actually get to dance someday.”

“Oh my gosh, have I never danced with you? That’ll be the first thing you have to do when you can. It’s law.”

“I’ll do it even if it actually isn’t.”

“Has physical therapy started?”

“Just this week. It’s a relief.”

Remus grinned, taking the popcorn from the cupboard and putting it in the machine. He bent down and hugged Logan from behind, head resting on his shoulder.

“I love being taller than you.”

“You’re not taller than me, I’m just sitting down.”

“I’m taller than you.”

Logan conceded for the sake of avoiding an argument, and soon there was a knock at the door. Remus answered it, welcoming their brother with a tight hug. Janus followed behind them, joining Logan in the kitchen.

“Remus tried to kill me, Logan.”

“You’re fine.”

“I’m emotionally wounded.”

“Go upstairs, bro. We’ll bring the popcorn.”

“I’m bringing the popcorn.”

Janus took the bowl, putting a piece of it in his mouth. He practically dragged Roman up with him by the wrist, leaving Remus to help Logan upstairs.

When they got upstairs, Janus was hoarding the popcorn as Roman tried desperately to grab some. He was whining like he did, Janus reveling in the length of his arms.

“Jan, share.”

“Nah.”

“Don’t forget I have the power to run you over.”

Remus nodded in agreement with their boyfriend, sticking their hand in the bowl to grab a handful. They gave half of it to Logan, offering their brother a single piece.

“Hey!”

“You gotta get it on your own.”

“You gave Logan some!”

“That’s ‘cause I love him.”

“Wow, you just don’t love me? I’m your brother.”

“No, I don’t care about you.”

Roman looked offended, Janus offering him some popcorn to shut him up. He grumbled as he munched. Soon, Virgil arrived, stealing the popcorn first thing.

“So, what’s the plan?”

“Remus said they wanted to play Truth or Dare, I mean, what are we, twe-”

“Oh my gosh, Truth or Dare?”

Roman grinned at Remus, immediately ecstatic about this news.

“Well, I guess we’re playing Truth or Dare.”

“Don’t disrespect Truth or Dare, Virgil.”

Janus leaned into his position next to Roman until it was enough to make him blush. Remus sat in front of Logan on the floor, Virgil in between them and Janus.

“In honor of the offense I’ve taken for Truth or Dare, Virgil. Truth or Dare?”

“Wow, Remus. Truth.”

“What’s the most illegal thing you’ve done?”

“Now you’re the one disrespecting Truth or Dare! You’re not even playing it right!”

“Answer the question.”

“Fine. I stole some greenbeans once from the produce section.”

“That’s it?”

“I’m paranoid about getting caught, okay? Anyway, you’re the person that wouldn’t do anything legally if you didn’t have to, Janus.”

“There’s not enough illegal things in this world.”

“How about Logan. Truth or Dare?”

“Truth.”

“Wow, boring. What’s the most illegal thing you’ve done?”

“Hmm… that’s between me and Remus.”

“You have to answer the question!”

“I’ve done graffiti before.”

“Seriously?”

“Janus asked us to write ‘fuck the government.’”

“Haven’t they done that themselves a million times?”

“I have.”

“Janus, then.”

“Truth.”

Roman grumbled. “One of you better pick dare soon.”

“Truth?!”

“Mhm.”

“I have never seen you pick truth before.”

“Well, maybe I wanted to change things up.”

Do they know?

“...Okay. How about... Have you committed arson yet?”

“...Maybe.”

“What do you mean ‘yet?’”

“Oh, has Janus not told you that ‘commit as many crimes as possible’ is their entire bucket list?”

“How do you not know this about me, Virgil?”

Virgil’s face was getting more and more bewildered as the game went on.

“So, Roman, Truth or Dare?”

“Dare. Because you cowards won’t choose it.”

“Dare?” Janus moved closer to the couch, looking up at Roman, smiling. “I dare you to go on a date with me.”

Roman blushed hard before composing himself.

“When?”

“Saturday, eleven.”

“Where?”

“Stables. I’ll pay.”

“Horseback riding? Isn’t that expensive?”

“I have ways of acquiring money.”

Virgil would have asked about those ways, but all of them were speechless.

“What? You think I wouldn’t find out that you’re trying to dare me into asking Roman out? Virgil isn’t exactly the best at hiding his phone.”

“Wow, Virgil.”

“I mean, does it matter, Remus? They asked him out anyway.”

“Hey, you’re right. Even if we didn’t dare you, it was still us that got you to do it.”

Janus realized his mistake, blushing in embarrassment.

“Well, I’ll probably end up with a boyfriend anyway.”

“Does this mean Operation Roceit is complete, Remus?”

“I’d say so.”

“Operation Roceit?!?"

#sanders sides #logan sanders #remus sanders #roman sanders #janus sanders #virgil sanders #intrulogical #roceit #ts logan #ts remus #ts roman #ts janus #ts virgil #tw food #tw fire mention #tw horse #sanders sides fic #grays fics #let me go

[originlist]

bron thots and hcs 99% harvested from rambling i sent to charri and didnt wanna retype yet

thinking about avicebrons workshop as i write. it is... a nice place to be i think. in my terms of nice. avicebron keeps it comfortably warm bc he likes it better that way. it smells like earth. warmly lit. there are various comfortable chairs because he used to just have one or two for himself and then he realized people kept coming by so hes just [sighs and adds another good chair and someone else drags in a bean bag or some shit]. hes got a bookshelf full of things. theres clutter but its an interesting kind of clutter and he knows where everything is anyways and the floor is cleared so ur not gonna trip over anything except maybe a golems whos keeping it tidy. its a chill place to read a book and if u ask nicely u can use some of the clay he keeps to makes lil figures with for fun. thonk bron: im going to make a place i like being in as a workshop narrator: this means other people will also like being there and sometimes hang out with you, which means you will be forced to acknowledge The Existence Of Other People bron: fuck. ive played myself

one day i will reread my source on kabbalah and itll be the end for everyone bc ive been interested in it since freshman year but its hard to find sources. and i have Thots about his golems but ill properly phrase them once im able to look thru my other primary source, for now i just ramble but basically his current golems except Adam arent like True Golems and even Adam is iffy because its moved past what a golem is

so proper golems are entities made thru certain specific magical rituals, and they are beings created generally by rabbis with a background in mysticism in order to help the community. a proper golem is highly autonomous and able to think on (almost) human level on its own, somewhat similar to a homunculus in proper homunculus lore but also, not. dont worry about it. i dont have the time to get into it. but one day. thats a threat. the final piece to animating them is writing on either them or an amulet they are given, which they can be returned back to earth by erasing the first letter they are, specifically, made to either help or protect which is why the reactor core thing is [singsong] bullshiiiiiiit

avicebrons golems are quickly made things that are more like basic familiars, as they possess a lower level of thought and dont follow ritual, the handoff of being less autonomy in exchange for being able to make a lot of them very quickly and easily so he doesnt count them as Proper Golems but he also classes them as More Useful For Our Situation Than A Proper Golem they can do chores and they will keep u safe but they also dissolve after a few hits

look the man’s disabled and he uses golems to make up for the fact, he doesnt need them to be durable or fully sapient he just needs them to do chores when he cant move his arms all the way and his back hurts

adam however (his NP) is a Proper Golem Plus Some. im ignoring the part where its like 'in fgo he also would need a mage or high level reactor to be its core' because thats stupid a proper golem doesnt need a core it just needs mystic words and some other stuff, but in exchange ill say he writes life into it using some part of his own magic plus whats drawn from his master, and the rest of Adam's unique reality marble ability is that it can pull mana from the earth directly quickly made familiars have mineral cores in order to like..... cores are the equivalent of when u pull back a ball on those clacker desk toys, where they keep going back and forth for longer than they should? the core jump starts the mana conversion procedure allowing it to create energy to move bc gems in fate are a good prana conduit

he can still do the thing of like. fuck i forget the word for it. earthbending. like he does in apoc where he just kinda draws shapes out of soil, but its only for various kinds of dirt. cant rly fuck with gems or metal but hes got bigass clay jars in his workshop full of dirt and clay and Various Rocks to make stuff ut of that he can control with a hand wave. it makes his life easier. bron vc do i LOOK like i can lift anything. i thought not.

uuhhhh other random bron infodumps bc i made other posts and then deleted them

no legge, prosthetics start at the hip ball-and-socket joint. arms yes. the second pair of arms is removable and attached to a thin plate that he can attach under his shoulders. the secondary shoulder joint is technically hypermobile and its easier to dematerialize/rematierialize them instead of putting them on and off. theyre usually not out unless he needs them for something. he is ambidextrious with all four of them and will show off in the name of efficient multitasking.

got a lotta facial scars from having acne as a young adult. pockmarks and the like. on top of his whole body being fucky.

does not like the cold!! makes both his physical and prosthetic joints feel stiff. will not mention it but will just [slowly recedes further into his cloak]

his hair is not as fun as it looks (to me). he hates having a body in general and so he will intentionally refuse to care for any non-prosthetic part of himself properly for it until it gets bad, so his hair is generally kinda dry and messy. its not Bad bad but its not great.

he takes better care of his fake legs than he does the parts of his body he cant replace and u should yell at him for it.

his cloak is also not as heavy as it looks like it should be. its carefully balanced. he can and will however bonk you with the pointy bits if you stand too close to him. forcibly mandated 4-ft personal bubble.

THIS MAN CLICK CLACKS WHEN HE MOVES AND I DONT CARE WHAT APOCS LACK OF SOUND EFFECTS TRIES TO IMPLY. this man WILL go click clack between his feet and the metal decoration thingies on his cloak bonking each other.

people who know shit about golem lore feel free to tell me all my books are packed but thoughts ping like ping-pongs

actually just tell me about folklore in general from any of u i like legends and mysticism 

if u have read this far tell me about some of ur folklore

#theres this one movie about a golem from like...... i dont know... the 60s.... its old... and idr the name but fsr the golem from it is like #permanently emblazoned into my brain. he hangs out there. he is shaped like my friend. i would trust him with my life. #brons im iffy on. i do not think they are shaped like friends but at least they get the job done #headcanon : avicebron

[drangues]

(This is late because I was Very Tired, super sorry about that asdfghjkl-) They’re little guys with cones on their heads! But yes they are very cute, I love them. Oh I could see them both having been raised in it! Dazai would pull off an escape, and then claim he left Chuuya behind when he gets out himself because he’s “an annoying slug” or something (but they’re actually best friends and Dazai would feel awful if his escape hurt him more). (Nyanon, 1/6)

Oh, actually, maybe Atsushi’s cult is how they meet? Like, Dazai and Kunikida are looking into leads, amd they meet Atsushi, who was a victim of it- But no one quite puts together that the cult Atsushi came from is what they’re looking for, at first? Because he never mentions anything super connected to them, only enough to make Dazai (and Kunikida) go “hm, sounds awful, come with us.” Am I making sense??? I hope so. (Nyanon, 2/6)

(Atsushi casually talks about the Awful Things that happened to him and everyone just. Slowly looks at him. Which is his queue that Maybe That Was a Bit Fucked Up, whoops, and then- “Kyouka please let go I’m okay now,, DIRECTOR PLEASE STOP CRYING-“ and then it’s a mix of fluffy and sad and funny sad, I think, you know?) The two of them are like that “People will die-“ // “Of fun!” meme and I love them for it. (Nyanon, 3/6)

Also RIP Fukuzawa (and your relatives and you), that sounds stressful. Ooohhh, that makes sense! I could see the ADA doing that- Though they don’t have A Lot of workers, so I’d think either three groups of four or two groups of six? Either way, some people (Yosano, Ranpo, DAZAI) complain about having to do paperwork at home. (Both of them are very sad, but Dazai insists on being Dramatic about it, to Kunikida’s ire.) Oh he absolutely goes insane the fastest! (Nyanon, 4/6)

Dazai lasts like,, One (1) day and then he starts pacing and all but climbing the walls because there’s only so much to do??? HE NORMALLY SPENDS HIS TIME TEASING KUNIKIDA AND MAKING ATSUSHI BLUSH HELP HIM. Ranpo is only ever Not Okay with it if he gets really bored AND he runs out of games to play and snacks to eat- Luckily Poe likes writing and will send him drafts of his work to keep him entertained. Kunikida is more upset than going insane, I think, but only at first! (Nyanon, 5/6)

Once he can hash out a schedule, he’s good to go (and he’ll also make schedules for everyone else if they ask, he’s nice like that). Anyways, onto my Concept: I can’t stop thinking about this so consider an AU where, after they meet, Atsushi just kinda. Adopts Q, like he did Kyouka? I don’t know, I just feel like they could have a really cute siblings relationship??? Then you add Kyouka in and it gets even better. I’m a sap okay. (Nyanon, 6/6)

dazai sabotaging his friendship with chuuya to keep him safe Breaks me like shut up bitch dont make me sentimental and it does make sense with the atsushi bit!! hes a victim who got suddenly kicked out (which is really weird for them cause that normally never happens so thats why they investigate into it and then slowly realise atsushi is part of That Cult)

yosano, ranpo and dazai being the group that goes to work together?? chaos . absolute chaos. theyll hate each other so much after their week together because theyll bother each other so much. yosano would be more reserved and try getting work done but as soon as ranpo and dazai keep on pestering her thats when she pesters them back as revenge

and kunikida definitely wOULD MAKE A SCHEDULE FOR YOUU of course itll first be a Very intimidating schedule but once you tell him you cant USE this he’ll  scoff, judge you but still change it to adapt you (or if he knows you well enough he already knows how to adapt the schedule fitting you best, unless its dazai thats when he doesnt care)

oh dude atsushi would win him over somehow probably when Q is near death or is about to fall and atsushi just reaches out to catch him and save him from the fall. Q is shocked like HUH i almost made you KILL YOUR FRIENDS and atsushi says something sappy like “Youre still a kid” and Q just Loses It (emotionally) because hes always been treated as this Dangerous Weapon but atsushi doesnt treat him like that (hes still sCARED of Q of course but atsushi is forgiving like that)

#anon #ask #ask anon #anon ask #nyanon #nyatsushi anon #bsd