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guqin-and-flute · 4 years

Text

The Soup Incident [Episode 22]

Random Jin Guy: hey u know ur sister

WWX: everyone's mom? best person in the world? beset by terminal heterosexuality? rings a bell

LWJ: i'm sure this is more important than a war

Random Jin Guy: something happened with j

WWX: [overrunning other line] I MUST GO MY MEDDLING IS REQUIRED

Random Nie Guy: oop there he go

LWJ: wow this sounds serious

WWX: what horrors will i find what trauma will this compound what cruelty will i be met with also how did i know exactly where to go

WWX: OH. YOU.

JZX: gross

JYL: oh an audience perfect i'm sure this will de-escalate things

WWX: can we solve this with castration? tell me we can

JYL: no thanks i'd still like the option if it's all the same to u

WWX: it's not let me remove his body parts

JZX: like i'd let u near me u classless hellion

JYL: listen life hasn't been like the greatest lately had a lot of shitty carriage rides i'd like things to chill out and by things i mean namely u in this moment can we go now pls i have an appointment to cry into my pillow that i'm missing

WWX: omg noooo i'll behave i'm here to support u i'll be impartial

JYL: i don't believe that for a single second tho hun

WWX: impartial to how mUCH BLOOD I'M GONNA GET EVERYWHERE HOW IS IT EVERY TIME I SEE UR STUPID FACE I HATE U MORE fuck u u piece o shit

JYL: and there it is

JZX: [angry sleeve flap of disdainful eloquence]

WWX: wtf

JYL: yeah he's good at those

JYL: honey ur not helping urself here he beat the shit out of u BEFORE he marinated in dark energy for 3 months pls use ur words and ur brain

WWX: WAT DID UR SLEEVE SAY TO ME BITCH

JYL: can we just go pls i like to not be reminded of exactly how much stupid i willingly allow into my life

WWX: but shijie M U R D E R

JYL: inexplicably i still want to marry him so no thank u

JZX: oh look mianmian's here

MM: u fuckin bet i am u dipshit

WWX: wtaf is wrong with him

MM: ok listen LISTEN i know i feel u trust me

JZX: time to return to the arrogance corner

WWX: UR YOUNG MASTER'S A BITCH

JYL: a-xian n o

MM: no he totally is u right

JYL: well then he's MY bitch :(

MM: why do i bother to stay up late to practice conversations with u if u don't bother to try all that time wasted am i supposed to cover for u now?

JZX: bold of u to assume u can but go for it still don't know why tf ur all here just wanna eat my soup

WWX: HEY I HAVE A FUN GAME IT'S CALLED HOW MUCH OF CHENQING CAN WE FIT INTO JIN ZIXUAN quick someone pick an orifice

JYL: gross

MM: tempting

LWJ: oh hey i'm here now i walk slow oh shit the nice jiang is crying who would hurt the nice jiang?

MM: ok so u know how ur sister makes soup?

JYL: i never really stop it's a little pathological at this point maybe i should talk to someone...

LWJ: oh more heterosexual antics wei ying's achilles heel best wait outside thank god Xichen is mostly functional and gay as the day is long

MM: so she makes soup right? 2 goes to you chuckleheads and the third goes to emporer perpetual foot-in-mouth over here

JZX: [buffering]

MM: jfc why do i even try

WWX: DID HE INSULT UR S O U P ?!

JYL: sorta i am soup and soup is me

MM: so anyway

JZX: [overrunning previous line] HOLD UP I THOUGHT RANDOM SERVANT NUMBER 62 BROUGHT ME THE SOUP THAT'S NATIVE TO YUNGMENG WHERE MY EX-FIANCE GREW UP

WWX: ur in love with an idiot

JYL: i'm in love with an idiot

MM: I STG UR HEAD IS FILLED WITH JUST HAIRBALLS AND LINT HOW ARE U STILL BREATHING

MM: SHE MAKES SOUP. SHE'S THE SOUP LADY. ASK PEOPLE WHAT THEY THINK OF WHEN U SAY YANLI AND THEY'LL SAY KINDNESS. A N D S O U P . and her murder-brothers but that's not the point rn

JZX: ...u made me soup

MM: i'm so fucking sorry pls marry him i need a competent woman to hang around with i'm getting dumber by the day

WWX: seriously this guy u love this guy?

JYL: xianxian pls romantic idiocy runs in our family it's practically traditional

JYL: i mean...yes i have 2 coping mechanisms; soup and crying neither of them are working rn tho help i don't unlock righteous fury until level 25

JZX: wow she made me soup

WWX: of course she made u soup u human inner-thigh chafe show us the flashback mianmian

MM: [off screen] oh yeah that roll the tape jeeves

[ENTER FLASHBACK]

JYL: i made u soup bb

JZX: ur not servant number 62 go fuck urself

JYL: wut

[END FLASHBACK]

WWX: NO FURTHER QUESTIONS UR HONOR

Random Jin Guy Who Brought Wuxian: perhaps this was a [cursive writing] Mistake™

JZX: ouchie i can twirly fight countless puppets can't dodge a punch of the life of me cultivation jesus that's gonna leave a mark

JYL: GOD I WISH THIS WAS MORE CATHARTIC how does this always happen? who raised this kid? oh right me

Group of Random Jin Guards: we are all well intentioned but ultimately expendable extras fear us

Random Jin Guard: UNHAND HIM FIEND

WWX: cool imma write u a song it's called Don't Care Didn't Ask Gonna Kill Everyone In This Tent Over Soup in b flat tootly toot here comes the murder flute

Random Jin Guards attacked by resentful energy: [keyboard smash]

LWJ: wait hold on that's his shit starting music has shit been started?? wEi YiNg

WWX: are u prepared for the journey i'm about to send u on little man

JZX: i'm actually good here thanks

[unintelligible teenage screaming]

MM: HEY LISTEN U CAN'T DO THAT MURDER IS BAD and i still like him i sympathize but like...u can't

WWX: the semi corporeal black smoke demons that sublet my soul tell me that it's fine sooo

JYL: a-xian if u kill him now i will have put up with so much bs for n o t h i n g

LWJ: take a deep breath us ur words what in the actual hell is going on

WWX: fuck u ur not my therapist

LWJ: u do not have a therapist never has someone so clearly NOT had a therapist except maybe jiang cheng

WWX: SOUP MURDER IS GOING ON

LWJ: wut

JYL: pls understand it's just as dumb as you think

LWJ: ... i refuse to let soup related crimes of passion be something my future husband is known for u stop that

WWX: THEN I'M LEAVING

LWJ: wow

JYL: we're both in love with idiots

JZX: am i still gonna keep getting soup?

[this is a thing i do sometimes so if you would like to see more...]

Scene suggested by @nagisachan1!! (I’m so sorry I forgot to tag/credit you when I posted this!)

#my stuff #cql crack #has the word soup lost its meaning for anyone else yet?#the transcript for this is saved under 'i'm at soup.docx'#brief summary #not so brief #oh well #I swear i'm working on the episode 4 one it's giving me HASSLES #please ignore the fact that I spelled emperor wrong i do that about half the time anyway #my edit

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traincat · 3 years

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I feel like I've read a ton, but I'm honestly still pretty new to comics rn. That being said... What is one more day? Ik we don't like it and it happened a while ago, but that's about it [,=

Time for Spider-Man History With Traincat: Highly Controversial Storylines! And that feeling is totally normal with comics with huge canons -- you can read a ton and still have some fairly big blindspots in your understanding of the total picture. That being said, this is kind of a big one, both in terms of Spider-Man history/canon and in terms of how Spider-Man fandom functions. I would say probably no other storyline has had quite as much impact on how the fandom views and interacts with the source material as One More Day/Brand New Day. It's been the Wild West out here ever since it happened. (Which was in 2007, so like, yes, fairly long ago, especially when you look at how Spider-Man canon has evolved since, but in the grand scheme of things, also kind of recent. One More Day is not old enough to rent a car.)

So when people talk about Spider-Man's One More Day, they're usually actually talking about two related arcs: One More Day and Brand New Day. For the sake of simplicity, I'm going to be covering both. For the sake of transparency, I am going to admit that I think One More Day, as a self-contained story, is good, actually. This is controversial! I admit that! But I stand by my stupid opinions on this blog, for some reason. I think One More Day when you examine it on its own, by which I mean you ignore the decade and a half worth of canon that came after it, as a Spider-Man story and as a PeterMJ-centric story holds up under scrutiny and that people who don't like it don't like complicated love stories and might actually throw their own mothers under buses. No offense to the OMD haters. Little bit of offense to the OMD haters. Brand New Day, which is the continuation of One More Day, on the other hand -- largely bad. Very largely bad.

But let's backtrack. One More Day is a four issue crossover storyline that takes place directly after Civil War, during which Iron Man and Captain America got divorced and divvied up the superhero community and Spider-Man made some startlingly bad decisions and made a fugitive out of himself and his family in a manner that got Aunt May shot, and Spider-Man: Back in Black (Amazing Spider-Man #539–543) which examines Peter's actions immediately after Aunt May is shot and ends with him humiliating the Kingpin in front of an entire prison. One More Day consists of Amazing Spider-Man #544 -> Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #24 -> Sensational Spider-Man v2 #41 -> Amazing Spider-Man #545. In One More Day, Aunt May is dying, all of Peter's efforts to save her have thus far failed, and, consumed by guilt, he is rapidly running out of time. Approached by Mephisto, a literal demon from hell, Peter is offered a deal: Aunt May will live -- and Peter's identity, which was previously revealed to the world at large during Civil War, will once again be hidden from the memories of all but a select few -- if Peter trades him his marriage to Mary Jane. Peter and Mary Jane struggle with this, but eventually both agree to the deal. The clock strikes twelve, the deal is done, and Peter and Mary Jane's marriage fades into history.

(ASM #545) A reasonably simple premise for a story that caused so many problems -- most, I would argue, not actually the original story's fault. So obviously, this was an unpopular move -- Peter and Mary Jane had for a long time been a fan favorite Marvel couple, and in a fictional universe where most relationships are doomed as soon as they begin, the enduring Spider-Marriage was sacred ground. And then, with a snap of its fingers, it was gone: Peter wakes up in Aunt May's house, no longer married, with Mary Jane out of the picture. (She would not return to the book on any sort of consistent basis for over 50 issues.) In the wake of One More Day began Brand New Day, which is basically what it sounds like: a promised "brand new day" of "exciting" Spider-Man content and a publishing schedule where Amazing Spider-Man came out three times a month. (Which sounds good on paper but I think in practice caused more problems than it created good storylines.) Peter, newly single again, had new love interests! And also Harry Osborn was alive again for some reason! I generally like Harry's post-BND stories so that part's fine with me.

But overall? Brand New Day is a mess. It knows it wants to tread new and exciting ground with Peter -- tell new stories! ensnare new readers! make them fork out for a book three times a month. -- but it doesn't know what those stories should be. Readers who were invested in Peter and Mary Jane's relationship -- a major facet of Spider-Man comics for decades at that point -- felt rightfully betrayed that the marriage could be so easily traded in and that Mary Jane herself, perhaps the second most important figure in Spider-Man comics after Peter, could be tossed aside. From a personal point of view, I think Brand New Day fails in large part because it abandons what has always made Spider-Man such a compelling series, and that's the mix of Peter's personal life with his vigilante life. BND sees Peter with new friends, new jobs, new love interests, etc -- it is very much a brand new day! But it isn't a better day compared to the stories that came before it. I do like some post-BND stories, especially American Son (ASM #595-599) and Grim Hunt (ASM #634-637), but compared to pre-BND where I think the majority of canon is good, it's a very lacking body of work that is hurt by the way it divorced itself from the PeterMJ marriage as Spider-Man's central relationship.

"But Traincat, I thought you said you liked One More Day?" Yeaaaaah. I do. This is why I keep saying I like One More Day on its own merits, and not on the merits of the stories it opened the doors for. I like a good romantic tragedy in fiction, and the way Peter and Mary Jane's final scene in One More Day plays out is beautiful. I like the idea of Peter caught in this impossible situation, being asked to choose between two women he loves more than his own life. A really common criticism I see leveled against One More Day is that Peter should have chosen his relationship with Mary Jane over May's life, which is -- okay, I think it's weird that people keep insisting on this, not in the least because by asking Peter to sacrifice his aunt's life they're essentially demanding he commit a callous, out of character act in order to further his own interests. It's also weird because the thing is, Peter already chose Mary Jane over May -- that's what gets them into this situation. It's literally in the scene where May is shot:

(ASM #538) When the gun goes off, Peter's spider-sense kicks in, and he covers Mary Jane, leaving May in the path of the bullet. He does choose Mary Jane over May, regardless of whether he realized what he was doing. And that's why he can't make that choice a second time. His actions in One More Day do make sense for him as a character, whether or not any individual reader likes them, and Mary Jane's actions make sense, too -- after all, she's the one who ultimately tells Mephisto that they agree to the deal when Peter can't bring himself to voice it.

A lot of people also like to nitpick One More Day by going, well, why could (x) or (y) with life saving powers save Aunt May which is like -- yeah, I guess, but if we're going to ask that about this specific comic book near death setup, you kind of have to do it with every single one, and I'm not going to stake every single moment of comic book drama on whether or not that gold kid from the X-Men was busy at the time. Comics are soap operas in flimsy paper form: serialized longform storytelling that relies heavily on melodrama. Sometimes you have to go with things. Sometimes you sell your marriage to the devil. Stuff happens. That in and of itself doesn't make One More Day a bad story -- and while some people blame the Spider-Marriage's dissolution entirely on One More Day, I think that's a little shortsighted when you look at the history of Spider-Man since the turn of the century. It's clear -- and Marvel themselves have been perhaps a little too open about this -- that Marvel in the past few decades has had trouble with the direction they want to take Spider-Man. They WANTED Spider-Man to appeal to a distinctly youthful audience that they didn't think they were actually reaching -- understandable, considering that Marvel nearly went bankrupt around 2000 and was saved by Ultimate Spider-Man, an out of main continuity series which retold Spider-Man from the beginning and focused heavily on Peter as a teen -- but the problem was Spider-Man in the main continuity was at that point in canon a happily married man who was pushing the dreaded 30 whether or not they wanted to admit that. This is also why Marvel has continually pivoted away from Spider-Man having kids, because they feared that making him a dad would age him too much and make him unrelatable to their coveted audience of Teens. (This is also why almost every new Spider-Man property, especially the live action movies, perpetually stick him back into high school, despite that occupying a very small slice of 616 canon.) So around the year 2000, they started trying things in relation to the Spider-Marriage, which was viewed as a major problem -- after all, what's more adult than being married and liking your wife. First, they had Mary Jane presumed dead. Then, they had Mary Jane and Peter separate. Then, when Mary Jane and Peter had only recently gotten back together, One More Day struck. If One More Day specifically hadn't gone the way it had, it's pretty clear that the Spider-Marriage was going to go one way or another -- it's a little bit of a shame it happened when it did, because OMD is the end of J Michael Straczynski's run, and JMS wrote a really beautiful Peter and MJ relationship. But Marvel as a company and especially editor in chief at the time Joe Quesada viewed Peter and Mary Jane's relationship as a major problem in how they wanted to portray Spider-Man and thought that striking the relationship from the books would allow them more freedom in their portrayal of him as younger and more relatable to their Desired Audience of people who I guess really wanted to see Peter sleep with characters who weren't Mary Jane.

(ASM #546. Younger! Fresher! Less attached! Kissing random women in the club!)

The problem with One More Day has always been in the follow through -- from the content of Brand New Day to the pacing of events to the fact that Marvel withheld key information for such a long time that it allowed misinformation to thrive. After all, what does it MEAN to trade Peter and Mary Jane's marriage to the devil? It altered the events of canon in Peter and the majority of other characters' memories so that the marriage didn't exist, but it left people wondering -- did the relationship as they remembered it existed? How much of Spider-Man canon was altered? And the answers didn't come for over 100 issues of Amazing Spider-Man. One Moment In Time or OMIT (Amazing Spider-Man #638-641), which revealed that while Peter and Mary Jane never got married in the altered canon they did continue their long committed relationship up until just after Civil War, was published in 2010, so essentially readers were hung out to dry without answers for three years. That's a long time to string people along, but not as long as it took Marvel to confirm that the popular fan theory that Mary Jane retained her memories of the original timeline as part of her own deal with Mephisto was also true, which happened this year. I would say, at least from my perspective, a lot of the frustration doesn't come from the individual One More Day storyline so much as how Marvel has continually dragged out the aftermath, using the promise of a Spider-Marriage return to keep fans on the hook. Which is why One More Day continually comes up in discussion of current Spider-Man, because Spencer's run has relied very heavily on imagery from that period with a serious question of whether or not there actually was going to be payoff, something which is still up in the air.

This has been Spider-Man History With Traincat, brought to you by anonymice like you.

#traincat talks comics #long post #*replies

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ravnicaforgoblins · 3 years

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Ravnica for Goblins

Laws of the Guildpact

Laws are a big deal in most worlds. On Ravnica, laws are literally the only thing preventing ten massive armies of Sphinx, Angels, Demons, Lich, Elementals, Giants, Wizards, Ghosts, Nightmares, and Kaiju from tearing each other apart in perpetual war. How is this possible? It’s possible because the Guildpact is not just words on flimsy paper. Guildpact Laws are Unbreakable Magical Effects. When all ten Guilds agreed to the Guildpact, they granted it absolute power.

How and why would many of the more evil and chaotic Guilds agree to something like this? Because Ravnica’s Guildpact is designed not only to account for each and every Guild’s lifestyle, but to empower it. There are laws that protect necromancy, laws that protect human experimentation, laws that protect torture, laws that protect murder, and laws that actually protect breaking the law. In addition to laws protecting peaceful citizens and law enforcement officials.

How can any civilization function like this? Balance. You may not be able to arrest a Dimir Agent for stealing, but you can absolutely break their face in. The goal of Ravnica’s laws is to preserve all ways of life for the Guilds, for better & for worse. Within your Guild’s set legal parameters, you are not just free but empowered to carry out that lifestyle. That lifestyle is written into the laws and protected by them. Which is why the single most important law is that you’re not allowed to punish a Guild member for obeying the Guildpact.

This is the most important law, but also the law that ended up destroying the Guildpact. House Dimir’s duty is literally to oppose the Guildpact, so when their Parun decided to kill the Boros Parun in broad daylight and got arrested by a Boros Wojek, the system kinda broke itself. Punishing a Guild for obeying the Guildpact by disobeying the Guildpact, resulting in: Error.4 *does not compute*

Fast-forward to the days of Jace Beleren as the Living Guildpact, and the laws have changed somewhat. The only laws that are still magically binding are the laws Jace verbally confirms. Once he does that, the person he says it to need only speak the law aloud and it’s an instantly unbreakable magical effect.

Now comes the tricky, difficult, infuriating part. For being so vitally important to Ravnican life, we don’t actually know what most, or really almost any, of the laws are. How are players supposed to utilize the effects of written laws if they don’t actually exist? Why didn’t WotC release an official Guildpact? That’s because a document that can actually encompass everything the Guildpact is theoretically supposed to be able to do would be an absolutely massive undertaking for a Card Game Company that doesn’t really need it for their card game, just for those of us playing D&D in their setting. Furthermore, even if they did put in the work, create a document, and release it; the internet (that’s us!) would tear it apart for flaws & loopholes. The internet would give the Orzhov, the Dimir, and the Rakdos a run for their money. Hence WotC doesn’t want to do this because it’s literally just a recipe for self-defeat, migraines, and disaster.

So instead, they give us little bits here & there. Promotional materials, card flavor texts, character stories, etc. Here is pretty much everything I’ve been able to gather that is either an Official Guildpact Law, references Law Magic, sounds close enough to Law Magic, or even just sounds true enough to the spirit of a Guild’s core beliefs to be potentially acceptable for invoking Guildpact Magic:

General Laws

*Petty theft is a violation of personal property with a charge dependent on judicial ruling. (Family Values)

*In consonance with the New Accord of the Guild of Ravnica, you are granted the right of exposure and are obligated by duty to present your evidence of financial corruption to the Living Guildpact. (Family Values)

*The Living Guildpact rules that coffee is an acceptable substitution for rest, as specified in subsection . . . whatever. (Catching Up)

*The magic of the Guildpact gives aegis to the spirits pressed into its service. Upon entering the afterlife, they find new focus and are charged with defending the Guildpact against those who would see it broken. (Guardian of the Guildpact)

Azorius Senate

*You have the right to remain silent. (Azorius Arrester)

*Your potential to commit a crime warrants further investigation. (Azorius Justiciar)

*To prevent action is to prevent transgression. (Inaction Injunction)

*We have confiscated your spells as evidence. Once we conclude our investigation, you may petition to have them returned. (Render Silent)

*Thanks to the magic in his Writ of Passage, alms beasts lumbered aside, anarchs bowed their heads, and even Rakdos acrobats rolled their spikewheels out of his way. (Azorius Knight-Arbiter)

*....A clause that ties the average length of prison sentences to recidivism rates. Theoretically, we could end up having negative-term sentences should the rate fall low enough.... Referenced an ancient Azorius Law, 394-H. (The Ascension of Reza)

*Azorius Law 3455-J: Failure to submit proper identification will result in detention for an indefinite amount of time. (The Ascension of Reza)

*If it happened in the Thinktank, I'm afraid we have no jurisdiction there. (The Ascension of Reza)

*Azorius Law 2795-V, Non-compliance with arresters.... (The Ascension of Reza)

*Azorius Law 3343-J, Traveling in a stolen vehicle.... (The Ascension of Reza)

*By the prerogative writ of emergency, and by a unanimous vote, I hereby declare Hendrik Azmerak Grand Arbiter pro tem of the Thinktank Enclave. As the leader of your people, do I have your permission to put the following law into effect? (The Ascension of Reza)

*To be Azorius is to serve as an exemplary model of moral conduct. (Azorius Guild Kit Instruction)

*Always keep your uniform pressed and your armor polished, in accordance with Regulation 654.2, Part 87, Section 28. (Azorius Guild Kit Instruction)

*Should you witness a criminal act, signal the Sky Hussars immediately and begin documenting the occurrence and details of the crime scene. (Azorius Guild Kit Instruction)

Boros Legion

*Your brother’s crimes are your crimes. You stood by and lent support, so you too must face judgement. (Wojek Embermage)

*It promises protection to those in need and proclaims a warning to any who would threaten Ravnican law. (Boros Guildgate)

*Stand tall. Even your posture should embody justice! (Boros Guild Kit Instruction)

*Act with honor, in all things. (Boros Guild Kit Instruction)

*Protect the innocent, at any cost. (Boros Guild Kit Instruction)

*You are never truly off-duty. Evil never rests! (Boros Guild Kit Instruction)

*Stay in top physical condition. (Boros Guild Kit Instruction)

*If you see evil, crush it. (Boros Guild Kit Instruction)

House Dimir

*All those who trade in questions must answer to the Dimir. (Citywatch Sphinx)

*Welcome to the Dimir Public Offices. Not responsible for death or loss of property. Basement off-limits. (Dinrova Horror)

*Do not disclose your affiliations with REDACTED (Dimir Guild Kit Instruction)

*Extract knowledge whenever possible. (Dimir Guild Kit Instruction)

*No fact is unimportant. (Dimir Guild Kit Instruction)

*Always REDACTED. Never REDACTED. (Dimir Guild Kit Instruction)

*Be invisible, silent, and ethereal. (Dimir Guild Kit Instruction)

*Know every exit from any building. it could save your life. (Dimir Guild Kit Instruction)

Golgari Swarm

*Waste nothing. Seek value in what they discard. (Golgari Guild Kit Instructions)

*Death is no excuse to abandon your responsibilities. (Golgari Guild Kit Instructions)

*Take pride in the decay that fuels our kingdom. (Golgari Guild Kit Instructions)

*Fear neither Death nor Darkness. They can be your greatest allies. (Golgari Guild Kit Instructions)

*You are now a part of the Swarm. Every action you take should serve the interests of the Guild, so that we may all rise together. (Golgari Guild Kit Instructions)

Gruul Clans

*We are the heart of the wild, the fire in its eyes, and the howl in its throat. Come, join the battle to which you were born. (Gruul War Chant)

*Nature is the ultimate mindless destroyer, capable of power and ferocity no army can match, and the Gruul follow its example. (Savage Twister)

*They are the voice of the wild, crying out with nature’s fury and bringing forth its primeval might. (Wild Cantor)

*Enter and leave the shackles of society behind. (Gruul Guildgate)

*Burn. Smash. Fight. Win. (Gruul Guild Kit Instructions)

Izzet League

*The only action worth taking is one with an unknown outcome. (Nivix Guildmage)

*Erase “impossible” from your vocabulary. (Izzet Guild Kit Instructions)

*Strive to discover something NEW every day! The point of science is not to endlessly confirm what is known- it is to map the barriers of reality to better demolish them. (Izzet Guild Kit Instructions)

Orzhov Syndicate

*Article 12 of the Orzhovniha, a governing person of Orzhov recognition may be granted entrance to the Obzedat's Chamber with proof of identity. (Family Values)

*Entrance is free. Donations are required. (Syndic of Tithes)

*Alms coins are only redeemable at Orzhov businesses. (Alms Beast)

*The fine print of countless contracts has ensured we are never defenseless. (Immortal Servitude)

*The rights of ghosts are strictly protected under Orzhov bylaws, and those who enforce them can count on the ghosts’ assistance. (Imperious Oligarch)

*Pay in gold. Pay in blood. Pay with the servitude of your spirit kin But pay you must. (Pitiless Pontiff)

*We have no need for military might. We wield two of the sharpest swords ever forged: Faith in our left hand, Wealth in our right. (Castigate)

*Remember by whose gift you ascend. (Gift of Orzhova)

Cult of Rakdos

*If the pig’s blood drips on you, you’re next on the chain. (Gore-House Chainwalker)

*Never suffer alone. That’s selfish. Pain is meant to be shared with others! (Rakdos Guild Kit Instructions)

*Revel in your pain, in all pain, for it is freedom! No wound compares to the suffering of a dull, law-abiding life. (Rakdos Guild Kit Instructions)

*Make a grand spectacle of your pain, and play to your audience! If they aren’t screaming, laughing, or both, your performance has failed. (Rakdos Guild Kit Instructions)

*Blood and fire look good on everyone. And make excellent decorations. (Rakdos Guild Kit Instructions)

*Always be creative, especially in your bloodiest ventures. New modes of carnage delight the Lord of Riots, and it is wise to seek his favor. (Rakdos Guild Kit Instructions)

Selesnya Conclave

*So many oppose us, but we are the reed that bends without breaking. (Druid’s Deliverance)

*From the seeds of faith, great forests grow. (Scatter the Seeds)

*Within the song of Mat’Selesnya, one becomes all. (Camaraderie)

*No one in the Conclave acts alone. (Armada Wurm)

*Just as leaves fall and the tree blooms again, one day I will fall and the Conclave will endure. (Conclave Cavalier)

*Whatever hatred destroys, a single act of trust can revive. (Emmara, Soul of the Accord)

*We are the shield that never breaks, the bough that never burns, the song that can never be silenced. (Join Shields)

*When you hold a shield, lend your shield. (Privileged Position)

*There are no soloists in the chorus of Selesnya. (Trostani, Selesnya’s Voice)

*Enter and rejoice! The Conclave stands united, open to one and all. (Selesnya Guildgate)

Simic Combine

*Life has no mistakes, only experiments. (Skitter Eel)

*Within each of us, the potential for great power waits to be unleashed. (Sauroform Hybrid)

*Look beyond, to the vascular awareness that all life is a map to greater knowledge. (Momir Vig, Biomancy, Volume I) (Biomantic Mastery)

*As I contemplate what is, I dive ever deeper into the depths of possibility. Then I set an experiment in motion and watch the truth rise to the surface. (Gyre Engineer)

*Fruits of magic, roots in science. (Vigean Hydropon)

*The unnatural pressures of life in this city are best withstood by lifeforms that adapt with unnatural swiftness. (Novigen, Heart of Progress)

*Mystery is beauty. Within the unknown we plumb revelation. (Simic Guildgate)

*Analyze every living thing you see, from the smallest tadpole to the mightiest dragon. Each one holds unique secrets of life, ready to be unlocked through careful study. (Simic Guild Kit Instructions)

*Modification of another’s body without their express permission will not be tolerated. (Simic Guild Kit Instructions)

*Learn to see the patterns all around you; let them illuminate truths that transcend species. (Simic Guild Kit Instructions)

*When you study a life form, identify its weaknesses, then eliminate them. (Simic Guild Kit Instructions)

#ravnica for goblins #ravnica #goblins #D&D #dungeons & dragons #roleplaying #mtg #campaign #laws #guild #guilds #guildpact #laws of ravnica #plane

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fyeah-bangtan7 · 4 years

Text

The Boundless Optimism of BTS

IT IS THE MORNING OF CHUSEOK, A KOREAN HARVEST FESTIVAL akin to Thanksgiving, and the members of BTS would normally be spending it with their families, eating tteokguk, a traditional rice-cake soup. Instead, Jin, 28; Suga, 27; J-Hope, 26; RM, 26; Jimin, 25; V, 24; and Jung Kook, 23, are working. Practicing. Honing their choreography. In a few days, the biggest musical act in the world will perform in the live-stream concert that, for now, will have to stand in for the massive tour they spent the first part of this year rehearsing. At this moment, they’re seated inside Big Hit Entertainment headquarters in Seoul, South Korea, the house they built, dressed mostly in black and white, ready to answer my questions. They’re gracious about it. And groggy.

Before I’m done speaking with them for this story, BTS will have the number-one and number-two songs on the BillboardHot 100, a feat that’s been achieved only a handful of times in the sixty-odd years the chart has existed. Their next album, Be, is weeks away from being released, and speculation about the record, the tracklist, the statement, is rampant across the Internet. BTS are, to put it mildly, huge.

There is something about complete world domination that can really cement a friendship. What jumps out at me as I connect with the members of BTS is their level of comfort with one another. Tension has a way of making itself evident—even over Zoom, even through a translator. There’s none to be found here. They are relaxed in the manner of family. Lounging with their arms around each other’s shoulders, tugging on each other’s sleeves, fixing each other’s collars. When they speak about one another, it is with kindness.

“Jimin has a particular passion for the stage and really thinks about performance, and in that sense, there are many things to learn from him,” J-Hope says. “Despite all the things he has accomplished, he still tries his best and brings something new to the table, and I really want to applaud him for that.”

“Thank you for saying all these things about me,” Jimin responds.

Jimin turns his attention to V, explaining that he is “loved by so many” and describing him as one of his best friends. Suga jumps in, sharing that Jimin and V fight the most among the group. V replies, “We haven’t fought in three years!” They tell me this distinction now belongs to Jin and Jung Kook, the oldest and youngest members. “It all starts as a joke, but then it gets serious,” Jimin says.

Jin agrees and recounts what their arguments sound like. “Why did you hit me so hard?” he says, before mimicking Jung Kook’s response: “I didn’t hit you that hard.” And then they start hitting each other. But not that hard.

Since the start of their careers, BTS have shown a certain confidence in their aesthetic, their performances, and their music videos. It’s right there in the name: BTS stands for “Bangtan Sonyeondan,” which translates to “Bulletproof Boy Scouts,” but as their popularity grew in English-speaking markets, the acronym was retrofitted to mean “Beyond the Scene,” which Big Hit has described as “symbolizing youth who don’t settle for their current reality and instead open the door and go forward to achieve growth.” And their affection with one another, their vulnerability and emotional openness in their lives and in their lyrics, strikes me as more grown-up and masculine than all the frantic and perpetual box-checking and tone-policing that American boys force themselves and their peers to do. It looks like the future.

“There is this culture where masculinity is defined by certain emotions, characteristics. I’m not fond of these expressions,” Suga tells me. “What does being masculine mean? People’s conditions vary day by day. Sometimes you’re in a good condition; sometimes you aren’t. Based on that, you get an idea of your physical health. And that same thing applies mentally. Some days you’re in a good state; sometimes you’re not. Many pretend to be okay, saying that they’re not ‘weak,’ as if that would make you a weak person. I don’t think that’s right. People won’t say you’re a weak person if your physical condition is not that good. It should be the same for the mental condition as well. Society should be more understanding.”

When I hear these words in October 2020, from my house in a country whose leader is actively trying to make the case that only the weak die of COVID-19, well, it sounds like the future, too.

IF YOU ARE JUST NOW CONSIDERING GETTING INTO BTS, IT IS natural to feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of stuff. It’s a bit like saying, right this second, “Let’s see what Marvel Comics is all about.” In the streaming age, BTS have sold more than twenty million physical units across fourteen albums. Their multi-album concept cycles, The Most Beautiful Moment in Life, Love Yourself, and Map of the Soul, have unfolded over multiple records and EPs. There are collaborations with brands, including a BTS smartphone with Samsung. There is a series of short films and music videos, called BU, or BTS Universe, and an animated universe called BT21, in which they’re all represented by gender-neutral avatars. Their fan base, known as ARMY, is a global cultural movement unto itself.

“Dynamite,” their first English-language single and their first American number one, is pure, ecstatic pop. Shiny and joyful. What sets them apart from many of their peers, and many of the pop acts who achieved worldwide fame before them, is what came earlier. Beneath the sheen and the beats has always been an unflinching examination of human emotion. Their lyrics seek to challenge the conventions of society—to question and even denounce them. BTS’s first single, “No More Dream,” unveiled at their debut showcase in June 2013, concerns the intense pressure South Korean schoolchildren face to conform and to succeed. According to Suga, lyrics about the mental health of young people were mostly absent in Korean pop music. “The reason I started making music is because I grew up listening for lyrics that speak about dreams, hopes, and social issues,” he tells me. “It just came naturally to me when making music.”

Suga’s early ambition of making music didn’t involve him being in a group at all. About a decade ago, in his hometown of Daegu, the fourth-largest city in South Korea, he started recording underground rap tracks under the name Gloss, listening to and learning from the early works of songwriter and producer Bang Si-hyuk, known as Hitman Bang. Bang is the founder and CEO of Big Hit Entertainment. In 2010, Suga, a junior in high school, moved to Seoul to join Big Hit as a producer and rapper. Then Bang asked him to become part of a group, envisioning a hip-hop act with fellow new Big Hit recruits RM and J-Hope. The guys call this “season one” of their development.

“At that time, I don’t think our label exactly knew what to do with us,” RM says. “They just basically let us be and we had some lessons, but we also just chilled and made music sometimes.”

It got more intense. The family grew, occasionally by accident.

V accompanied a friend to a Big Hit casting call in Daegu for moral support and ended up being the person chosen from those sessions.

Jung Kook was signed in a feeding frenzy after being dropped from the talent show Superstar K, fielding offers from numerous entertainment companies before settling on Big Hit because he was impressed by RM’s rapping.

Jimin was a dance student and class president for nine years running at his school in Busan; he auditioned at the behest of his teacher.

And then, to hear him tell it, Jin got picked up off the street. “I was just going to school,” he says. “Someone from the company approached me, like, ‘Oh, this is my first time seeing anyone that looked like this.’ He suggested having a meeting with me.”

“Season two is when we officially underwent hard training,” J-Hope says. “We started dancing, and that’s how I would say our team building started.”

School in the daytime, training at night. “We slept during classes,” V says.

“I slept in the practice studio,” J-Hope counters.

Hitman Bang kept the pressure comparatively low. And he encouraged the guys to write and produce their own music, to be honest about their emotions in their lyrics. Suga is on record saying that no BTS album would be complete without a track that scrutinizes society.

And yet for their new album, Be, they’re putting that aside. Even this has a greater purpose that relates to mental wellness: RM, the group’s main rapper, says, “I don’t think this album will have any songs that criticize social issues. Everybody is going through very trying times right now. So I don’t think there will be any songs that will be that aggressive.”

Though the new rules of COVID-19 mean they can’t come here and promote Be, its first single might not have happened in the first place but for the pandemic. “ ‘Dynamite’ wouldn’t be here if there was no COVID-19,” says RM. “For this song, we wanted to go easy and simple and positive. Not some, like, deep vibes or shadows. We just wanted to go easy.”

Jin agrees. “We were trying to convey the message of healing and comfort to our fans.” He pauses. “World domination wasn’t actually our plan when we were releasing ‘Dynamite.’ ” World domination just happens sometimes. You get it.

MAP OF THE SOUL ONE AIRED VIA THEIR ONLINE FAN PLATFORM and attracted almost a million viewers across 191 countries. The guys say they tried not to think about the enormousness. J-Hope adds, “I felt a little bit more nervous knowing that this was being broadcast live. I actually feel less nervous performing live at a stadium.” Jin replies with a smile, “J-Hope, born to perform at a stadium.”

The graphic layout of the title throws a colon between the final N and E, which makes it look like Map of the Soul On: E, and as I watch it live, as I do in my office at 3:00 a.m. with noise-canceling headphones and a steaming pot of coffee, it feels a lot like I’m watching Map of the Soul on E. It is an explosion of color and fashion and passion, over four gigantic stages, from the boozy swagger of “Dionysus” to the emo-trap introspection of “Black Swan.” Not a step, not a gesture, not a hair is out of place. If there were nerves, they didn’t come through.

There is also, at the end of Map of the Soul One, an intimate version of their 2017 track “Spring Day,” which encapsulates what’s really made BTS stand out. On the surface, it’s about nonspecific love and loss, about yearning for the past. “I think that song really represents me,” says Jin. “I like to look to the past and be lost in it.”

Fair enough, but there is an undeniable allusion, in both the song’s video and its cover concept, to a specific incident in recent South Korean history. “Spring Day” was released just a few years after the sinking of the Sewol ferry, one of the country’s biggest maritime disasters, in which a poorly inspected, overloaded ferry toppled in a sharp right turn. Hundreds of high school students drowned, having obeyed orders to stay in their cabins as the boat was going down. According to some reports, the South Korean government actively tried to silence entertainers who spoke out against it, with the Korean Ministry of Education fully banning the tragedy’s commemorative yellow ribbons in schools. I ask whether it was about a specific sad event, and Jin tells me, “It is about a sad event, as you said, but it is also about longing.” The song kept the disaster front of mind for young Koreans and for the media, indirectly leading to the impeachment and removal of then president Park Geun-hye.

If an overburdened, undermaintained, slow-moving vessel capsizing because of a reckless rightward turn strikes you as somehow symbolic of the country in which BTS are about to explode even further, you won’t hear it from them. “We’re outsiders—we can’t really express what we feel about the United States,” says V. But their actions speak volumes; in the wake of the George Floyd murder and subsequent protests in America, the group made a $1 million donation with Big Hit Entertainment to Black Lives Matter, one that was matched by BTS ARMY.

The fans offer a fascinating inversion of stan culture: Rather than bullying rivals like many other ardent online fan bases do, ARMY have put the positive message of the music into action. Their activism goes deep. Through micro-donations, they’ve regrown rain forests, adopted whales, funded hundreds of hours of dance classes for Rwandan youth, and raised money to feed LGBTQ refugees around the world. Where pop fans a generation ago might have sent teddy bears or cards to their idols for their birthdays, where five years ago they might have promoted a hashtag to get a video’s YouTube viewer count up, for RM’s twenty-sixth birthday in September, international fan collective One in an Army raised more than $20,000 for digital night schools to improve rural children’s access to education during the COVID-19 crisis. ARMY may have even entered the conversation around the 2020 presidential election when hundreds of thousands of Tulsa Trump rally tickets got snapped up online in June. The event’s actual attendance was pathetically low. No particular person or entity claimed credit for this top-notch trolling, but a video urging BTS fans to RSVP to that rally did get hundreds of thousands of views. We have no choice but to stan this fan base.

The relationship is intense. “We and our ARMY are always charging each other’s batteries,” RM says. “When we feel exhausted, when we hear the news all over the world, the tutoring programs, and donations, and every good thing, we feel responsible for all of this.” The music may have inspired the good works, but the good works inspire the music. “We’ve got to be greater; we’ve got to be better,” RM continues. “All those behaviors always influence us to be better people, before all this music and artist stuff.”

Yet for every devoted member of BTS ARMY, there is someone who’s looked right past BTS. Jimmy Fallon, whose Tonight Show hosted the group for a full week this past fall, was one of those people. “Usually if an artist is on the rise, I hear about them ahead of time. With BTS, I knew they had crazy momentum, and I’d never heard of them.”

Here’s a thought that used to be funny to me: There were members of the live audience of The Ed Sullivan Showon February 9, 1964, who weren’t there to see the Beatles. Elvis was in the Army, Buddy Holly was gone, and the three number-one albums in the months before Meet the Beatles! were an Allan Sherman comedy record, the West Side Story original cast recording, and Soeur Sourire: The Singing Nun. America had left rock ’n’ roll behind for the moment, and with the culture aimless and fragmented, it wasn’t quite sure what to pick up in its place. It is possible to imagine that a youngish, reasonably hip, and culturally aware human being might cop a ticket to that week’s show, settle into his seat, and say, “Bring on a medley of numbers from the Broadway musical Oliver! and banjo sensation Tessie O’Shea.”

The instinct is to laugh at that guy, and it’s a good instinct, because what a dope.

And then you become that guy.

Sometimes there is a whole universe alongside your own, bursting with color you’re too stubborn to see, bouncing with joy you think is for someone else, with a beat you thought you were finished dancing to. BTS are the biggest thing on the planet right now, yet the job of introducing them to someone new, particularly in America, seems like it’s never done. Maybe it’s because they are adored by screaming teenagers and we live in a society patriarchal enough to forget that screaming teenagers are nearly always right. Maybe it’s the cultural divide, in a moment when our country is unashamed enough of its own xenophobia to get openly bent out of shape when it has to press 1 for English. Maybe it’s the language barrier, as though we understood a single word Michael Stipe sang before 1989.

Whatever the reason, the result is that you might be missing out on a paradigm shift and a historic moment of pop greatness.

IF BTS SEEM A BIT CAUTIOUS WITH THEIR WORDS PUBLICLY, IT’S because—perhaps more than any other massive pop act in history—they have to be. Shortly after our second meeting, BTS were given the General James A. Van Fleet Award by the U. S.–based Korea Society for their outstanding contributions to advancing relations between the United States and Korea. In his acceptance speech, RM said, “We will always remember the history of pain that our two nations shared together, and the sacrifices of countless men and women,” as seemingly diplomatic and innocuous a statement as he could have made. But because he didn’t mention the Chinese soldiers who died in the Korean War, it didn’t go over well. The Samsung BTS smartphone disappeared from Chinese e-commerce platforms, Fila and Hyundai pulled ads in China that featured the group, the nationalistic newspaper Global Times accused them of hurting Chinese citizens’ feelings and negating history, and the hashtags “BTS humiliated China” and “there are no idols that come before my country” began trending on the social-media site Weibo. The pressure is not small.

Even as the number-one pop group in the world, even with their hard work day in and day out, even with tens of millions of adoring fans redefining the concept of “adoring fans” by literally healing the planet in their name, these guys still suffer from impostor syndrome. RM explains, “I’ve heard that there’s this mask complex. Seventy percent of so-called successful people have this, mentally. It’s basically this: There’s this mask on my face. And these people are afraid that someone is going to take off this mask. We have those fears as well. But I said 70 percent, so I think it’s very natural. Sometimes it’s a condition to be successful. Humans are imperfect, and we have these flaws and defects. And one way to deal with all this pressure and weight is to admit the shadows.”

The music helps. “When we write the songs and lyrics, we study these emotions, we are aware of that situation, and we relate to that emotionally,” J-Hope says. “And that’s why when the song is released, we listen to it and get consolation from those songs as well. I think our fans also feel those emotions, maybe even more than us. And I think we are a positive influence on each other.”

If there’s one thing they’re sacrificing, besides free time and the ability to speak freely without the Chinese foreign ministry releasing an official statement, it’s a love life. I ask about dating, broad questions like “Are you?” and “Is there time?” and “Can you?” and the answer to all of them is pretty clear: “No.” “The most important thing for us now is to sleep,” Jung Kook insists. Suga follows right up with “Can you see my dark circles?” I cannot, because there are none, because flawless skin translates even over Zoom when there’s an ocean between us.

So they’re not, at least publicly, having romantic relationships with anyone. If there is a strong relationship that’s guided their journey into adulthood, it’s with Big Hit. “Our company started with twenty to thirty people, but now we have a company with so many employees,” RM says. “We have our fans, and we have our music. So we have a lot of things that we have to be responsible for, to safeguard.” He considers it for a moment. “I think that’s what an adult is.”

“Our love life—twenty-four hours, seven days a week—is with all the ARMYs all over the world,” RM adds.

In a world that is determined to sand down anything that isn’t immediately recognizable to the average pop-music fan, when it comes to acquainting you with Korean culture, BTS very much do not wanna hold your hand. While the first song on night one of their Tonight Show week was a joyous but expected take on “Dynamite” with Fallon and the Roots, they took some chances during their second performance.

As a friend of mine, a thirty-three-year-old BTS fan in Los Angeles, told me, “The second song they performed was ‘IDOL,’ ” from 2018’s Love Yourself: Answer, “and it celebrated their Korean identity. They performed it in Gyeongbokgung Palace in Seoul. They wore clothes inspired by traditional dresses called hanboks;it was almost entirely in Korean, so it felt super subversive. As a fan, I read it as: ‘Dynamite’ was an invitation, and this is who we are and this is our home.”

“I was a little concerned that people might not understand,” Fallon says. “I was like, ‘There’s nothing in English here.’ But what you see is just pure star power. Pure talent. Immediately, I thought, Oh, this is everything. If you’re that powerful, it transcends language.”

American popular music in the twenty-first century is more fragmented than it has been since . . . well, since Allan Sherman, Leonard Bernstein and Stephen Sondheim, and the Singing Nun battled for that number-one spot. The monoculture that the Beatles helped bring on has breathed its last breath. Each of us is the program director for our own private radio station, letting our own past habits and streaming-service algorithms serve up something close to what we want. Which is great, except that huge moments can whiz right past our ears. Each of us, even if we’re more clued in than our parents were when they were our age, can miss some era-defining, excellent shit. Particularly if the radio is our Spotify Discover Weekly, or the Pandora channel based on the band whose T-shirts we wore in college. We can let a moment pass us by if prime time is a Netflix binge, and the Tonight Show hour is spent on one more episode before bed. But we shouldn’t. “Honestly, I think it’s history that we’re living through with BTS,” Fallon says. “It’s the biggest band I’ve seen since I’ve started late night, definitely.”

THERE IS ALSO THE SMALL DETAIL THAT, UNLIKE THE BEATLES AND literally every other worldwide sensation to break in America, BTS don’t particularly need to go to the trouble. They are massive all over the world. Thanks to the recent IPO of Big Hit Entertainment, of which each member is a partner, they are all now incredibly wealthy. (Hitman Bang is the first South Korean entertainment mogul to become a billionaire.) What good is a culture in decline to a pop act this much on the ascent? “When I dreamed of becoming an artist, I listened to pop and watched all the awards shows in the United States. Being successful and being a hit in the U. S. is, of course, such an honor as an artist,” says Suga. “I feel very proud of that.”

They’re breaking out in a country that either worships them or fails to notice them. So do they feel like they’re getting enough respect in America? “How can we win everyone’s respect?” Jin asks. “I think it’s enough to get respect from people who support us. It’s similar everywhere else in the world. You can’t like everyone, and I think it’s enough to be respected by people who really love you.”

Suga agrees. “You can’t always be comfortable, and I think it’s all part of life. Honestly, we are not used to getting a ton of respect from when we first started out. But I think that gradually changes, whether it be in the States or other parts of the world, as we do more and more.”

There is, without a doubt, one colossal, unmistakable sign of respect for a musician: a Grammy. They’ve been nominated only once, and even then it was for best recording package. But their sights are set on a big one next year. RM puts it out there: “We would like to be nominated and possibly get an award.” Dragging the hoary, backward-looking, and Western-focused Grammys into the gorgeous, global world of the present through sheer force of will, talent, and hard work? Stranger things have happened. “I think the Grammys are the last part, like the final part of the whole American journey,” he says with a smile. “So yeah, we’ll see.”

The Recording Academy’s seal of approval is one thing. But BTS have already conquered the world, clowned tyrants, inspired individual fans to perform the small and achievable acts of activism that have collectively begun to save the planet, challenged toxic masculinity by leading with vulnerability, and, along the way, become bajillionaires and international idols. Whether the Grammys are paying attention matters about as much as what an Ed Sullivan audience member expected to see that night in 1964. BTS have already won.

#bangtan #jungkook #jimin #v #suga #jhope #jin #rm #o:esquire #o:interview #201123

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ardenttheories · 4 years

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Homestuck's always been antagonistic and insensitive, but I don't recall seeing any of you try to dox Hussie? But please, continue to rationalise how cyberbullying lgbt people for not being nice enough and having opinions about a fictional character you disagree with puts you in the right. A story doesn't go the way you'd like and this is how you respond? You COULD have just not bothered reading it instead of CHOOSING to make your online life about something you hate like a toxic weirdo.

Hi, Kate. I’m so glad you could find my blog. (Edit: that was a joke. Apparently, some anons find it impossible to tell that I don’t actually think you’re Kate). It’s clear to me that you didn’t take the time to read through any of the content that’s actually on here, since you’re throwing around rather wild accusations, so let me take this down step by step.

Homestuck has only rarely been antagonistic and insensitive. Things like the Alpha Trolls - which were clear criticisms of fandom culture - were relatively few and far between, and when we complained about them, they actually stopped. Remind me, for instance, how relevant the Alpha Trolls were to the plot? How long they stayed as mockeries towards the fandom? Yeah, not long. I actually have talked about this before on the blog - alongside other things I thought were negative towards the fandom from the original comic - but the difference here is that... in the entirety of Homestuck, these things were outliers and inconsistencies. They stuck out because they were in stark contrast to the otherwise wonderfully handled content Homestuck went over.

For instance, Homesuck is critical of abuse - especially in terms of relationships. We see through a critical lense the shit normalisation of parental abuse can do to a child - with actual talk of triggers and of the mental and emotional scarring left behind, and the complexities of the child’s feelings towards the parent’s death through Dave - and we see how self destructive relationships can be, how harmful they are, and how hard it can be to leave them - such as Terezi’s very toxic blackrom with Gamzee, which was always portrayed as something negative and harmful especially with how worried Karkat was for her and how withdrawn she became during its run, and Dirk’s relationship with Jake, which goes very much over how communication can cause a deterioration in romantic relationships especially when the two participants have conflicting mental illnesses.

It also goes over how men, though they can be mired in toxic masculinity, can choose to be good. How sometimes we’re not born as good people, but we can become good people through the love we have for the people around us, through frequent attempts to check what we’re doing, through the sheer willpower to be good. Dirk’s entire arc, knowing that he could very easily become Bro but deciding he doesn’t want to be, that it’s something he wants to work on, is so important and incredibly powerful. Mental illness in men is often just given as an excuse to make them violent with no attempts at betterment - so Dirk actually existed as proof that you don’t have to be that stereotype.

In contrast, Homestuck^2 completely uncritically gave Jade, who was cis, a dog dick, made her, a bisexual woman, a sex maniac and the yaoi “woman who gets in the way of the gays” trope, made her a cheater and someone who forced her partner into the relationship to begin with, and made her a neglectful mother after having cheated with her best lesbian friend in something that has incredible recall to just about every futanari video ever - and they tried to claim that this was good representation of trans women, actually, and that the only reason we didn’t like it is that Jade is “a woman” who “has sex”.

Likewise completely uncritically, they made Gamzee, an anti-black stereotype, enter a relationship with Jane, a fascist, and then made the entire thing into a cuck joke wherein Jake being frequently drunk and sexually assaulted was funny because he wasn’t “man enough”. They then forced him to go back to his abuser after he left her in a scene that read very much like, “ridiculous man thinks woman is abusing him, go back and do your manly job”.

This, of course, doesn’t even go into the travesty that is any form of trans representation in the comic. Roxy, a trans man, is barely even focused on as trans; they make no attempt to enforce in the fandom that he’s a trans man the way they do that June is a trans woman, and even then, they seem to think that just saying someone is a trans woman is actually good representation. Not, like, bringing it into the comic - just saying that it’s a thing. And of course, that’s not even going into the completely uncritical lense they have of Vriska, wherein her being a trans woman completely frees her of any and all blame for the past abuses she has comitted, and once again she becomes an amazing character to save the day without a single flaw - which in turn inherently associates trans women with abuse apologism, abusers, and the ideology that just because we’re trans we can get away with anything scott free.

I honestly cannot think of one instance of good and genuine representation in Homesuck^2, nor can I think of any scene where negative content was actually treated as the negative thing it actually is. There’s no critical lense at all, not like we have in Homestuck; there’s just no fucking comparison. And this isn’t a one-off situation, either. Whereas Homestuck does do fuck ups - isn’t perfect - in between the otherwise brilliant content, Homestuck^2 is just founded upon these horrific takes. There’s almost no good content in between, and what is left is a slog to get through when surrounded by the thick slurry of shit that compromises futa Jade, abuse apologism Vriska, and victim blaming Jake.

Of course, we didn’t “doxx” Hussie. Hussie actually listened to our complaints, for the most part, and worked with us to create something that worked well. The way Homestuck^2 was touted to work. You know, since it was meant to be written with the fandom in mind, influenced by the things we suggest and react to. We went into Homestuck^2 with the explicit idea that we were going to be listened to and taken into consideration when it was being written - the way we were with old Homestuck. I’m very sorry to say that, when you make these expectations, people are going to be a titchy bit upset when you then commandeer the entire thing and exclude the fandom from any of the process that you said they were going to be part of.

Additionally, it’s rather funny, isn’t it, that what you call doxxing is actually just people upset with how triggering content is being handled, and going to the people who actually wrote the content in order to voice their complaints? It’s almost as if social media exists to allow this communication between reader and author, which is a fundamental thing you’ll learn in any creative writing course, such as the one I’m on currently, wherein you’re actually taught how to respond to social media and to build up your image with your fans.

Homestuck^2 is an ongoing piece of media. We’re well aware that we have a potential to change these uncritical takes and the horrific way they’re being handled if the writers will just listen to genuine criticism. This is, frankly, no different to the people who go to J. K. Rowling’s Twitter to tell her how harmful her transphobic comments are; because if she believes these things, they will work their way into her texts and will perpetuate harmful ideologies.

The literal same thing is happening in Homestuck^2 - again, such as futa Jade, which normalises the point of view that bisexuals are cheaters and completely trivialises what it means to be trans, or Gamzee, which perpetuates just about every anti-black stereotype possible. Media does have a very powerful impact on what people see in the real world. This is why, for instance, positive black characters are so important in media; if they’re always portrayed as villains, then people will see real world black people as villains as the ideology is perpetuated to the point of fact. This is especially true if the people already believe in the ideology.

Fiction is one of the best ways that we can counteract this cycle. If you make a character that they like, and they happen to be positive representation, and then they watch more media that is likewise positive representation, it’s more likely to stick that these positive representations are the actual experiences of minority groups. Also? It’s important TO those minority groups. A black person, especially right now, doesn’t want to see an anti-black stereotype fuck a fascist, engage in sexual assult, and then enact pedophilia - only to die at the hands of a hero and be laughed at for the death. Surprisingly, shit like this is why we need to tell the writers that what they’re doing is harmful, that they’re perpetuating phobic ideologies, and that we need better representation - especially in a comic that is this widely read, and also has a very large minor fanbase.

I shouldn’t need to explain why exposing minors to anti-black stereotypes, transphobic, homophobic, biphobic, abuse apologism, victim blaming, and the trivialisation of rape and sexual assault (especially towards men), might be a federal fucking issue.

So, no, we’re not actually cyberbullying LGBT+ people. We’re trying to hold shitty writers accountable for the incredibly toxic and harmful ideologies they’re forcing into a text that has always been written with critical thought in mind.

I should also point out how funny it is that you’re focusing on how some of the writers are LGBT+ - as if we’re not? I’m trans, I’m gay, and I’m ace. Yes, I can actually be these things and absolutely furious that a trans women is writing some of the most transphobic shit I’ve seen in a while into characters she then claims to be completely free of blame. We can be furious that people within our own community are enforcing negative stereotypes.

Being LGBT+ does not make them free from blame. We cannot give them a free pass to be racist, to be transphobic, to be homophobic, biphobic, to be abuse apologists, just because they’re LGBT+. Not only because that’s just a terrible fucking idea to begin with, but because it also reflects so, so badly on the community as a whole. As if being part of the community instantly means that you can do no wrong? As if there can be no toxicity within our own community, despite the fact that there very much is and it is still an issue to this day?

That is such an issue, one of the biggest issues even shown just in Vriska and the way Kate handles her as a whole - and, once again, is WHY we need to get them looking at this shit more critically. This view that LGBT+ people can do no wrong and cannot be criticised is shoved into Homestuck^2 and, once again, perpetuates the ideology. This isn’t something to be proud of. This isn’t something that’s actually okay.

Also, your point that the writers aren’t nice enough and that we disagree on fictional characters - well, I’ve already been over the second part. But for the first part, I would like to remind you that they aren’t just random LGBT+ people on the internet that we’re going to because we think their takes are a little shitty. They’re actual writers working on a piece of media. They are official content creators.

Again, one of the first things you learn on any creative writing course is that when you become a writer, you gain a significant amount of responsibility for your interactions with the fandom. This is something that you genuinely have to expect, and if you don’t, then, unfortunately you just don’t know what it means to write something that thousands of people have a potential to read. As a writer, it is your responsibility to portray your image online; it is your responsibility to engage with the fans in a meaningful way; it is your responsibility to not cause drama and to listen when criticism is brought up, to have genuine discussion and not to perpetuate hatred - especially towards your own fanbase.

Consider, for instance, the way I’m talking to you right now. This is the sort of tone that someone should take when talking to a fan about genuine criticism. When things are brought up, you go over them step by step, you listen, you write back - you don’t go on a flurry of “fuck yous” to a minor who asked you why your team didn’t post anything about the BLM movement on the official Twitter, and you definitely don’t respond to every comment with genuine criticism with the word “pigshit”. You almost definitely don’t tell your trans masculine and masculine-aligned nonbinary fans that their opinions don’t matter.

As a writer, Kate and the rest of the team have a responsibility with their interactions with their fans. They aren’t just normal fandom voices anymore; they’re official fandom voices, voices that have more weight behind them than anyone else. They’re who people are going to turn to when it comes to anything regarding Homestuck^2. Their words now reflect literally everything about Homestuck^2, the future of Homestuck as an expanded universe, and the opinions of the group as a whole. They have to be careful with what they say. They have to be held to the same standards as industry voices because that’s essentially what they are - especially now that Homestuck is something you pay for.

Also, this isn’t a point of the story not going the way I want. This is a point of many of people in the fandom being upset with how content is being handled, upset that their voices are being shut down, upset that triggering content is being laughed at or used flippantly and without care or respect. This is people being upset that trigger warnings were removed specifically to make the comic unsafe for them as a punishment for daring to say that something was wrong. This is people being upset that a piece of media that used to be so fucking good at portraying sensitive content in a critical light, that used to be so good at normalising LGBT+ identities and healthy representations of those identities, has suddenly turned to this.

The story can go whatever way it wants - and frankly, that’s fine be my. What isn’t fine is that content is being used specifically to hurt and to incite.

And, of course, that final piece; nothing will improve if we don’t say that it’s wrong to begin with. Someone needs to voice the complaints of the fanbase, othrewise these toxic ideologies are going to go unchecked. One of the biggest things I’ve come to understand while making these posts is that a significant portion of the fandom feels isolated in their hurt; they don’t think other people feel the same way they do, and several people have mentioned feeling like they were going crazy because they were upset with things that the text and writers are normalising. It’s so important to make sure that these people know they’re not alone. It’s so important to make sure that our voices are heard. It’s so important to try and create critical discussion and debate over something that so many people still fucking love.

The thing is, I don’t hate Homestuck^2. I actually really, desperately wish I could enjoy it. I wish I could read through it and theorise, could go in depth about how amazing the characters are, could write long and extensive posts on how creative and engaging it is - could even just go on about how interesting the Meat-Candy divide is, and all the points they’re trying to make about canonicity. But I genuinely fucking can’t. There is just so, so much wrong in the text that is completely unrelated to plot and to the overarching Point that makes it impossible for me to read, to want to read, to try to encourage other people to read. They’re things that literally don’t need to be in there, either; stereotypes and toxic ideologies and uncritical or badly handled sensitive topics that could be rectified so, so easily.

Homestuck^2 could be amazing for a lot of the fandom. It could be something that we all rally around the same way we did for the original comic. For for a lot of people, it has ruined their fandom experience, has ruined their desire to want to read anything more to do with Homestuck, and has caused a significant portion of the fandom to just drop out entirely. That in and of itself should be a sign that this isn’t just a little fandom drama. That this is something much bigger and much more serious that, just maybe, needs to be looked into, talked about, understood - and, potentially, changed.

#homestuck^2 #homestuck^2 critical #long post//#ardenttheories #Apologies for how long this is. I wasn't going to finish it until I got every point across #And that ended up being... uh. Several thousand words I suspect #Anonymous

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littlejeanniebean · 4 years

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A to Z, please! 😂

lmao i’m gonna be a tease and interpret this as dealer’s pick, so:

J for Jeannie! Write or describe an alternative ending to [insert fic].

So *rubs hands together eagerly* at the end of Up to No Good / Mischief Managed, Ginny is a morning show host and Harry is a teen idol actor, right? Everyone else pretty much has the same jobs they’ve always had in the main fic. But consider:

Harry Potter Band AU Headcanons

The Weasley Family Band and they’re so freaking popular, they have their own TV show à la The Patridge Family, and every single episode is just like:

Bill (plays the banjo and harmonica, big country music guy) and his super hot gf Fleur try to get some alone time but Mama Bear Molly aka their band’s videographer is just not having it

“And what do we have... here?” Molly pulls the bunk’s curtain aside, handheld camera in hand.

“Mum! Jesus H. Christ!”

“Language, William!” Molly and Fleur say at the same time. (It was the start of a beautiful friendship.)

Charlie (plays all the weird instruments - theramin, bongos, kazoo) tries to adopt a new pet and take it on the road with everyone

“Oh my god, there’s a mouse in the tour bus!” Ron gets up on the table.

“It’s only Scabbers!” Charlie holds up a fat brown rat.

“We’re not bringing a rat to France!” Molly snaps. “Ron, get off the table, for goodness sakes!”

“But he could be the next Ratatouille!” Charlie argues.

Molly looks into the camera like she’s on The Office.

Percy (classically trained pianist and flutist) doesn’t want to go on stage

“It’s embarrassing!” he whines.

“You’re embarrassing,” says Ron.

“Boys,” warns Arthur.

“And do I really have to wear this?” Percy doesn’t like their costumes for the Christmas special, thinks they’re too matchy-matchy.

“Yes,” hisses Ginny, “Mum knitted them herself!”

Percy scoffs, “That explains the lopsided —”

“How does everyone like their costumes?” Molly comes in, a beaming smile on her face.

“Love them, Mum!” Percy kisses her cheek and throws on his Weasley family sweater.

Ron rolls his eyes, “Kiss-up.”

Fred and George (guitar and bass, respectively) + sound system engineering intern Lee Jordan = PRANKS

Fred is stuffing Arthur’s filing cabinets with rubber ducks.

“Remind me why we’re doing this again?” asks Lee.

“So that he’ll finally start digital record-keeping,” says George.

“Save the trees!” adds Fred.

“Yeah, but why rubber ducks?” Lee checks the finder app he put on Arthur’s phone to track him (he was still in a meeting down the hall).

“He thought they were bath scrubbers until he was like, eleven,” says Fred.

“It’s Aunt Muriel’s favorite childhood story to tell,” adds George.

Lee nods, barely containing a loud, barking laugh, and goes back to checking the app. “Shit! Shit! Shit! He’s coming!”

Ron (plays the keyboard and the drums and the guitar, just really good at everything, but he thinks that means he doesn’t have this own thing™️) and his bff, Harry, have a bucket list for every city they visit, but the showrunner tells them this isn’t enough for their story arc

“Is that just a fancy way of telling us, we’re lame?” Ron narrows his eyes at them.

“We’re getting you a love interest,” says the showrunner.

“No, you’re bloody hell not!” Ron gets up to leave. “Come on, Harry!”

But Harry is enjoying this. “I happen to have a friend from my last acting job —”

“Harry!” Ron feels betrayed.

“— Hermoine Granger,” Harry continues, a shit-eating grin on his face, “always knows her lines, very professional —”

“She’s a nightmare, honestly!” Ron tries to tell the showrunner, but they’re not listening. “She’s mad!”

“Okay, fine, you can go ahead and think she’s weird,” says the showrunner. “It’ll be like Cory and Topanga in Boy Meets World.”

“Great — Wait, no! They end up together!” Ron’s face is almost as red as his hair and Harry is falling off his seat in a fit of cackles.

“Oh, and Harry, if you could spend the next episode just hanging around in Ginny’s general vicinity, that would be perf,” the showrunner adds, almost as an afterthought.

“What? Why? Ron and I were going skiing!” says Harry.

“Well, bring her with you, then. The director thinks she’s hiding behind her drum kit too much. You’re good with people. Just help her come out of her shell a bit?”

Harry, honestly thinking he’s being helpful, agrees.

Ginny spends the next episode in a perpetual state of despair because her actual celebrity crush from her favorite TV show is RIGHT THERE TALKING TO HER OH GOD SHE’S GONNA DIE

and now I really wanna write this, damn 😂

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aion-rsa · 3 years

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Back to the Future Not Being Planned as a Trilogy Is What Makes It Great

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In the last decade, it’s become a common refrain among fans and industry players alike: the filmmakers should’ve “planned it better.” This trilogy could’ve been mapped out; those five sequels needed to be outlined first. Perhaps this is inevitable in an era where “shared universe” is part of the everyday vernacular, yet I cannot help but be amused when folks grow wistful over sequels with allegedly concrete roadmaps: franchises like Star Wars, Godfather… and the Back to the Future trilogy.

Whenever social media discussions about sequels or franchises that most smoothly told their sagas rear, Robert Zemeckis and Bob Gale’s little trio of time traveling adventures always spring to the forefront. With their economy of storytelling and strong fixation on characters, particularly lovable Marty McFly (Michael J. Fox) and eccentric Doc Brown (Christopher Lloyd), the three movies’ narrative is as stainless as the steel doors on the DeLorean. Even innocuous, seemingly throwaway details in the first movie turn out to have unexpectedly delightful payoffs in the sequels, such as the Doc’s interest in discovering who will win the next 25 years’ worth of World Series games.

Of course the irony in this is that Back to the Future was not planned as a trilogy; this was a “universe” structured around only one story, with its sequels acting as mere expansions on those initial foundations. Even the “cliffhanger” ending of the first movie, with Marty, Doc, and the original Jennifer Parker (Claudia Wells) piling into a now flying DeLorean to “do something about your kids,” was never meant to be more than a gag.

“We never designed the first Back to the Future to have a sequel,” director Zemeckis confirmed on the 2002 DVD release of Back to the Future Part II. “The flying car at the end was a joke, and it worked as a great joke and a great payoff. Everyone assumed we had this grand design like George Lucas did about Star Wars and had all these sequels. My only hope for Back to the Future ever was that it would make its money back.”

He goes on to say that if he had planned on doing a sequel, he would’ve never put Jennifer in the final scene—hence why in the sequel, the character (recast with Elisabeth Shue) spends most of the film asleep on a front porch.

Said Zemeckis, “I would’ve had only the Doc and Marty be in the car, and then I could’ve put them on any adventure. But what happens when you make a movie this successful is it becomes a piece of real estate, it becomes a franchise. And the reality comes at you very quickly, which is ‘we’re making a sequel. You can either help us or not, but the sequel is going to be made.’”

Fortunately, that sequel was made with most of the key players who turned the 1985 film into an enduring classic still in place, including Zemeckis and his co-writer/producer, Bob Gale, at the top of that list. Indeed, it’s even fair to look at the success of the trilogy and conclude that world-building is overrated. What makes Back to the Future shine all these decades later, both as a singular film and an appealing trilogy, is it was always about developing an intriguing story, as opposed to an open-ended milieu of content.

The first movie was originally conceived of by Gale based on a simple epiphany. While going through his father’s old high school yearbook, he came across a photograph of the old man that revealed he’d been elected class president.

“I had no idea,” Gale told Den of Geek last year. “And I’m looking at this picture of my dad, and he’s very proper and straight. And I’m thinking about the president of my graduating class who was just somebody I would have nothing to do with. We were just in completely different circles.”

This raised a million-dollar question: Would he have been friends with his dad in high school?

The dawning realization every young person must come upon, when they realize their parents and authority figures really were young folks like themselves once upon a time, had never been captured on screen before, much less in a mainstream movie through the prism of science fiction. But that’s what the original Back to the Future script did with its yarn about an ‘80s teenager inadvertently traveling 30 years into the past to spend the week with his mother and father in high school.

Granted, it’s more than the premise that makes Back to the Future so winsome. While the movie unquestionably benefits from the striking social distance between 1950s teenagers and their ‘80s counterparts—with the sexual revolution, Vietnam, civil rights, and second wave feminism between the two eras—it still plays to kids another 30-plus years later because of its intelligence and timeless universality. Taking the concept of “Chekhov’s gun” to its breaking point, there is not a single element, character, or detail set up in the first act in 1985 that isn’t paid off once Marty travels back to 1955, and then paid off again when he returns home in the denouement.

Marty’s mom, Lorraine (Lea Thompson), attempting to micromanage her children’s love lives with apparent 1950s social values? Well, in the actual ‘50s, she was smoking, drinking, and had no problem “parking” in cars with boys. Mayor Goldie Wilson running for reelection in 1985? He’s a young ambitious man on the make in ’55 (and with a keen eye for a good campaign slogan). The clock tower that hasn’t worked since it was struck by lightning 30 years ago? It becomes the gosh darn centerpiece of Back to the Future’s climax.

Everything flowed together with the precision of an actual, working clock tower, and it worked in service to the self-awareness which springs from young people seeing their parents in a different light. Plus, Alan Silvestri’s musical score just made everything Marty and Doc did seem to have the import of charging across the frontlines.

Movies

Back to the Future: Why You’ll Never See More Eric Stoltz Marty McFly Footage

By Chris Cummins

Movies

Why Fan Response to the Back to the Future Sequels Changed

By Chris Cummins

So this proverbial little ‘80s teen comedy overperformed at the box office after ending on a teasing note that left viewers hanging. Zemeckis and Gale did not write Back to the Future to lead anywhere but the line “where we’re going, we don’t need roads,” but audiences (and the studio) wanted to see what was at the end of that skyway.

Thus Back to the Future Part II and Part III came into existence—but with the ambition of its creators to make them every bit as narratively complex as the first film they were borne out from. While the sequels were very much designed on the conventional wisdom that audiences want to see their favorite characters get up to the same shenanigans, Back to the Future Part II particularly subverts this. The sequences of the film set in the future of 2015 plays into “the same but different” by bringing nearly every actor from the first film back to play their same character at a more advanced age—or younger in the unnerving case of Fox being asked to play all of Marty and Jennifer’s children—but that sequence is then quickly jettisoned for something closer to It’s a Wonderful Life than Back to the Future.

Even when Gale first began conceiving of the sequels, he imagined Marty and Doc winding up in 1967 to “correct” the future. There Marty would again see his parents, George and Lorraine McFly, in shocking ways: George would be a college professor while Lorraine would’ve become a flower child, joining the hippie movement.

However, it was Zemeckis’ input that had the story fold into itself. Instead of just playing with different time periods and doing the same setup again, the director suggested using the third act of the sequel to enter the first movie from a different vantage point. He actually did what mainstream audiences supposedly want—basically remakes of the same story—but with a much more skewed sensibility with two Martys and two Docs running around, and all of them converging on a plot that involves further cliffhangers and switchbacks on the first movie, like an ending where the sequel’s Marty surprises 1955’s Doc Brown moments after Doc had sent Marty home. Now the Marty we’ve followed for the whole second film runs up behind the Doc to say, “I’m back from the future.”

Also in a quaint departure from how sequels are conceived today, the absence of Crispin Glover as George McFly in Part II and Part III stemmed from Universal Pictures and Amblin Entertainment failing to lock actors into sequel clauses. Back then, it was assumed movies were a one-off experience, and when Glover decided he didn’t want to appear in a sequel… well, there’s a reason George McFly had to die in the alternative 1985 ruled over by a Trumpian Biff Tannen (Thomas F. Wilson).

All of these concessions and choices made on the fly were not preordained or sketched out, but the talent involved was so keen on connecting their limitations to previous successes that they made a satisfying three-part whole out of a one-off, and without getting bogged down by fan service or further world-building. Nearly every choice made in the Back to the Future sequels—with exception to the inexplicable development of Marty being unable to withstand the insult of “chicken”—organically built off character traits or story concepts in the first one, flowing into a self-perpetuating circle.

Sure, there are inconsistencies. Consider the way the third movie is seeded into the second; it betrays a looseness to the world-building when Buford “Mad Dog” Tannen’s photo in Part II looks nothing like the character design in Part III. But it doesn’t ultimately matter. The elements that really determine the films’ quality, such as character, structure, and dialogue, are airtight across all three pictures.

Strangely though, this connective tissue was hidden at the time of release. As Gale told Den of Geek last year, there was a resistance at Universal to let general audiences know a third movie was on the way until after they’d seen the second one. There was even a fight to exclude the trailer of scenes from the third film at the end of Part II (at Gale’s suggestion).

“The biggest fight that I had with the president of Universal when we were planning the release of Part II is that I was adamant that I wanted to advertise this as part two of the three-part Back to the Future series, part two of the trilogy, and he didn’t want to do that,” Gale said. “He just wanted to say, ‘This is part two. Let them find out about part three later.’”

Gale is convinced that lack of understanding that Part II was setting up Part III led to both films being somewhat underappreciated during their releases. Now their legacy is as tightly woven with the first film, as well, those early Star Wars movies are. To the point where Back to the Future is often singled out as this rare thing—a near perfect film trilogy. That might be true, but it wasn’t set up that way. There’s a lesson in that.

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The post Back to the Future Not Being Planned as a Trilogy Is What Makes It Great appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3vDXwKK

#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

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atamascolily · 4 years

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Extremely subjective opinions about Star Wars planets

Inspired by @carmarthenfan. I did my top ten faves, and then gave up trying to put these in order, so they're literally in the order they occurred to me.

(This is not conclusive; I left a bunch out. There are a lot of Star Wars planets, y’all.)

1. Tatooine.

Iconic. Terrible place to live. Great place for making your characters suffer. Who cares that the ecology makes no sense when you have wide open spaces, exposed rock layers and salt flats, and a rockin' aesthetic? Not to mention wretched hives of scum and villainy and also, like, ACTUAL DRAGONS.

(Thesis: literally half of what makes ANH so compelling is that it's set on Tatooine.)

2. Yavin IV (Legends)

AKA Jedi Jungle Friendship Camp or Space Guatemala. If I was going to live anywhere in the GFFA, it'd be here. Temple ruins (even if they are infested with Sith ghosts), hot springs, rainforests, biodiversity, awesome eclipses and a giant blood-red gas giant constantly overhead, not much in the way of development... what's not to like? (Okay, the Sith ghosts are a problem, but they got rid of those eventually.)

3. "Forest moon" of Endor, ROTJ

Redwood forests are awesome. I'd totally live in an Ewok treehouse. They're the only place in the galaxy with handrails!!

4. Coruscant

I'd probably hate to live there, but it's a great setting for fic. A surprisingly large amount of wildlife and plant life, despite the rampant development. Epic architecture, lots of culture, Luke has a cool retreat in the Manarai Mountains and Han and Kyp go skiing at the poles. Home of "the room where it happens".

(most of my fics to date are set on Tatooine, Yavin or Coruscant, lol)

5. Alderaan

Too bad the Empire blew it up. :( IDK about the whole Killik business, but Space Switzerland seems great, and I'd live there in a heartbeat. An actual multi-biome world, wow! I should write more fics about this place.

6. Myrkr (Legends)

Jungle planet with metallic trees and furry, Force-repelling lizards. Also giant vornskrs that use the Force to hunt. Don't forget Talon Karrde's awesome tree base!

7. Dagobah

I love this place, even if living there would be a challenge. Actually kinda has a functioning ecology in canon. Love the sheer abundance of snakes, plus dragonsnakes and the mangrove-like gnarltrees, which are the adult form of giant white spiders (I love plant-animal weirdness like this).

8. Mulako Comet (Legends)

Not technically a planet, but how can you not love a resort carved out of a giant frozen comet HOW. 10/10, we stan. The perfect place for a romantic getaway, especially if you are a water nerd like Luke.

9. Vjun (Legends)

The Gothiest goth place ever to Goth. Has names like "River Weeping" and carnivorous moss that nibbles on Obi-wan. <3. Vader's Goth castle was originally here before the writers moved it to Mustafar.

10. Honoghr (Legends)

Another terrible place to live, thanks to the Empire's sabotage, but I love there's actually an attempt at an ecological plot line here (Timothy Zahn is surprisingly good at those). A single biome world, but for a legit (and sad) reason. I should write some fics about this place.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Corellia (Legends) - It's okay, I guess? I'm not sure how I feel about the Corellian trilogy in general, but there are some things with the Selonians and the Drall that could be interesting for fic? Also, Treasure Ship Row is cool.

Kessel (Legends) - Hell-realm. Not sure if Kevin J. Anderson's "glitterstim" is the same as "spice," but Han and Kyp have to fight off giant spiders in the dark underground mine, which is certainly dramatic. Had a moon until a prototype Death Star blew it up.

Ithor (Legends) - JUNGLE PLANET POPULATED BY BOTANY NERDS, SIGN ME THE FUCK UP. But they won't let you actually explore the surface, because it's sacrilege. :(

Belsavis (Legends) - Hoth on the surface, Yavin in the rift valleys (but with, like, plantations), plus underground tunnels full of monsters and Jedi artifacts. Home of a secret Jedi botany master and his plant friends, so I'm in favor.

Chad (Legends) - Mostly ocean planet--I guess Space Earthsea, but with more geological activity? Callista makes it sound dreamy and idyllic in her flashbacks, but all the native Chadra-Fan are trying to GTFO, so I dunno.

Nam Chorios (Legends) -Like Tatooine, I would probably hate living there, but it's a great setting for a fic. The perpetual twilight would get old fast, but I love the terraformed ecology, the sentient rocks and the Force storms. Drochs are super creepy, though.

Hijarna (Legends) - There are ruins and sweeping vistas. What can I say, Karrde knows how to pick a secret base. :)

Dathomir (Legends) - Rancors have to be native to somewhere, so why not Dathomir? Courtship of Princess Leia is hokey and weird as all get-out, but it did give us Teneniel Djo, and I love her.

Hapes (Legends) -100% better at you than everything, and they know it. Leave them to it.

Yavin 8 (Legends) - Giant snakes and giant eagles... who literally eat children. Kinda weird being in a place where humanoids are on the bottom of the food chain. Love the Melodies' amphibious lifestyle, though.

Wayland (Legends) - Endor with the serial numbers filed off. Still love it, though. And Palpatine built a lair in a giant mountain! Props to him.

Ryloth (Legends) - sounds like an actual hell realm, but a desert planet? One half in perpetual sun, one half in perpetual darkness, and only a very narrow habitable zone? I’m game.

Msst (Legends) - Terrible, if accurate, name. All we ever see is the eponymous mist, plus giant pink creatures that numb you with poison and devour you alive. Brakiss's home planet. No wonder he hates everything. On the plus side, his mom got to see Luke Skywalker naked, so good for her.

Kashyyyk - TREE WORLD, WE GO HARD (part II). Except I don't think the Wookiees have handrails, do they?

Hoth - Ice, ice, baby. Ecology makes no sense; it's a fucking glacier. I would hate living there, but I've read so many fluff fics about snowfall fights and sex in X-wings and supply closets that I feel a kind of fondness for it.

Byss (Legends) - Dark. Hidden. Secret. Goth as fuck. I like it. Exegol, but with more class.

Ahch-To - Skellig Michael is great, but too recognizable as itself to really be a good stand-in for somewhere else. Puffins are better than porgs. Great place to hide, but I stand by my claims that the Jedi order could not have arisen there. Love the aesthetic. The Caretakers deserved way better!

Naboo - Space Italy. Would definitely live there. Closest thing we see to Dinotopia in the GFFA. (Tell me Theed isn't Waterfall City!)

Kef Bir - why not just let the original forest moon have multiple biomes? It's okay to have multiple-biome worlds, I promise, we wont get confused. Epic sweeping grasslands, steep cliffs, massive waves. I love what little we see of it.

Crait - you're going to film a Star War on the Bolivian salt flats and NOT make an epic dream sequence with the night sky reflected on the salt?? What. Hoth with red dust. Crystal foxes look like Vulpix from Pokemon, and I like them.

Ilum - cool ice planet gets turned into planet-destroying superweapon and blown up. Not a fan.

Bespin - I don't know about the ecology, but 10/10 for aesthetics.

Nal Hutta / Nar Shaddaa - Ecological disaster. Gross and full of Hutts.

Niraun (Legends) - I don't like caves and that's pretty much all we see. Especially if those caves are filled with carnivorous hordes of Space Army Ants.

Gamorr (Legends) - "Procedures programs for visiting Gamorr consist of a single line: DO NOT VISIT GAMORR. Really!” Especially do not visit in the season known as "slushtime".

Af'El (Legends) - I know very little about it, but it seems cool? "The Dark World". Home planet of the "wraiths" (Defel) and the homunculus wasps.

Kijimi - "Disneyworld with space facism". Swirling snow and stone looks cool at night. Too bad that fight scene was such a mess.

Takodana - it's the English Lake District, I'm never going to be able to suspend my disbelief to believe it's anything else.

D'Qar / Ajan Kloss - Yavin IV knockoffs. If you want me to care, you're gonna have to give me something better.

Exegol - this “planet” is just a CGI soundstage with a floating pyramid/arena whatever, and lightning. Weather instantly improved when Palpatine died, which strongly suggested he liked it that way. Knockoff Byss.

Mustafar - Literal hell-realm. Lava does not work like that. And apparently, ROTS insists it also has snow and trees, which seems like a little too late.

Canto Bight - you'd think people with that much money would have a better-looking planet. ughhhh.

#star wars #ecology #fictional natural history #fic ideas

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imaginariumrpc · 3 years

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okay so the lovely @imbicilite / @whitrph and i were talking and it gave me the idea and we thought it was a great idea to spread it around so here’s how it goes: when talking with someone about pretty much anything tbh, but especially for something that could potentially be triggering, communicate with color codes based on city traffic lights ! GREEN means it’s good to talk about these things and you’re not feeling triggered by the topic, YELLOW means to slow down or stop talking about the topic at for now while RED means to stop the conversation about the topic immediately until green again where the conversation can divert into another topic or they feel safe to talk about it again !! this is EXTREMELY important, because it’s a way to alert others that you’re going to be talking about something that could possibly upset someone because of the subject matter, especially for those who may get triggered by a certain topic - even without you realizing it because squicks and triggers can honestly be anything, it could be different words or phrases or certain topics - and can cause severe anxiety in those affected, even panic attacks or flashbacks, and because we want to be considerate and respectful towards one another, it’s important that we use these to help our friends and fellow rpers know that we’re going to be posting or talking about something they might not want to see or talk about, and it’s of utmost importance to make them feel safe, it’s best to use this to be a more supportive friend and a member of the rpc!!

on a sidenote, i’m also here to tell you about tone indicators !! keep in mind that i didn’t come up with nor invent the concept of tone tags itself, but it was being spread around for a while now and i’d figured i’d talk about it !! essentially, tone indicators are used to indicate if the person is joking, being serious, etc., neurodivergent people often have trouble conveying and understanding emotion and tone through written text, using tone indicators is really helpful for neurodivergent people to make it easier for them to read/convey, it is also very helpful for people with anxiety. i encourage anyone who reads this to also type the meaning of the tone tag ( i.e: i love you !! /p for platonic ), so it is more accessible for neurodivergent and disabled people, like those who use screen readers.

“why should we use tone tags?” one might ask, but as an autistic, disabled and otherwise neurodivergent person myself, sometimes i don’t always get my friends and fellow mutual’s tones by their message but when they use tone indicators, it helps me understand and, not to mention that it can be really helpful and avoid misunderstandings. i would also like to note that NOT ALL neurodivergent people want you to use tone indicators on them, so if they don’t want you to use tone tags on them, please respect their wishes.

“i don’t like tone tags!” one might add, well, okay... but don’t make fun of the people that use them, it’s not a big deal, and if you’re a neurotypical who insists on not using tone tags when a neurodivergent person clearly asked you to, get your head out of your ass.

“using /j at the end of a joke ruins it!!” one might bitch, and okay but... it might be ruined for you, but it still makes me laugh, personally, so please try and get used to it, and not to mention, what’s more important: making sure you’re clear with your tone so that there’s no misunderstandings or throwing a fit just because the joke’s ruined for you?

additionally, some other things to keep in mind !! please do not mock the use of tone tags, you may not need them but some people do, not everyone can tell when something is a joke, when someone’s either being platonic, romantic or sexual in intentions, etc.,, especially when there’s no visual cues or tones of voice to help us, just be nice about it, it’s... really not hard, man. if you don’t use a tone tag and someone reads the tone of your statement incorrectly, do not get upset with them or laugh at them for not getting it - that is perpetuating ableism and/or sanism, whether you intentionally intend it or not. just kindly clarify and next time, keep in mind that tone tags are very helpful for neurodivergent, disabled and people with anxiety disorders. using a tone tag isn’t an excuse to be mean either, you can’t just say something mean or not cool and then put /j ( “joking” ) after it to get away with it, don’t be an ass. if you’re saying something that could be anxiety inducing for others, i would highly recommend putting the tone tags at not only the end but also the beginning of that post. do not intentionally use tone tags incorrectly “as a joke”, to confuse people, etc., the entire point of tone tags is to clarify, not confuse people, if you intentionally use them incorrectly, you’re an ass. keep in mind that no one has to use all the tone tags, use what you’d like, respect others who use what they would like, use them however feels rights to you. for me personally, sometimes i use multiple, sometimes only one, or sometimes none at all, just do what feels right, depending on who i’m talking to and how long i’ve known this person or group of people i’m speaking to, it’ll be fine, and if someone asks for clarification on what you mean, that’s okay, kindly clarify for them. additionally, please be patient if people don’t know what tone tags are, someone might not even be aware of what they are and that’s not their fault, just patiently explain it to them or link them to a source !! education always helps !! please don’t use “/srs or serious” as a joke, some neurodivergent and/or disabled people don’t need you to use three tone tags, and in my case, i’m presuming you’re neurotypical if you’re doing that when conversing with me, but what i’m trying to say is it looks like you’re babying us neurodivergents / disabled folx, so try to use only two tags ( that is, if that person is okay with it !! ), because some people don’t need you to use three tags.

please note that the following aren’t every single example out there and there are different terminologies in different languages, but they are important, a few examples of these are:

“/j = joking / used when saying something in a joking manner, “so im pretty much the president of oreos /j”,

“/hj = half joking / used when saying something that’s kind of a joke but kind of serious / “well,,,,, im usually right /hj” /

“/s or /sarc / refers to the opposite of what you really want to say / “i just [clenches fists] love...... being sad..... /s”,

“/srs / used when saying something you really mean / “i really appreciate you /srs””,

“/nsrs = not serious / used when saying something not too seriously / “you’re the worst /nsrs”,

“/lh = lighthearted = used when something’s said lightheartedly / “hEY LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS /lh” / i’d say something like this when me and my friends would get into a silly argument and they’re trying to ask my opinion on a topic”,

“/ij = referring to something that’s only understood by people with special knowledge about something, typically only a small group of friends or a group of people would be aware of, those outside of the group would most likely be confused by it or not find it funny in the same way people within in the group would / “aAAAAAAAAA MY NUGGIES!!!!! /ij””,

“/ref = a reference to media, usually movies, tv, music, etc., “yOU SHALL NOT PAAAAAAAASSSSSSS /ref”,

“/t = teasing, use when teasing someone or provoking someone, often playfully, “aiight sure mx idk wtf im doin /t”,

“nm = not mad, to indicate you’re not actually mad or upset about something / “ow... i felt that /nm”,

“lu = a little upset / used when about about something or someone, but not too upset / “oh... that sucks /lu”,

“/nbh = “nobody here” = often used when talking about something vague to ensure your friends it’s not indirectly to or about them / “sometimes i just wanna..... tell someone to shut the fuck up /nbh”,

“/nay = not at you / used when saying something but not meaning it at the person you’re responding to / “god i can’t stand lame people /nay”,

“/ay = “at you”, make the person aware you’re addressing them”,

“/g or /gen = used when saying or asking something for real / “i’m proud of you /g” or “have you watched the news?? /gen”,

“/th = threat, used when giving a genuine threat / “if you don’t stop, i’ll block you /th”,

“/p = platonic, a friendship type of love, used when saying something with platonic intentions / “i love you /p”,

“/r = romantic intentions, typically of partners when saying something with romantic intentions / “i love you /r””,

“/a = alterous, an attraction best described as wanting emotional closeness without necessarily being at all or entirely platonic and/or romantic, used when saying with alterous intentions / “i love you /a””

“/m = metaphor / used when saying something metaphorically / “god you’re a shining star /m””

“/li = literal / used when saying something literally / “i hate pears /li””

“/rh = rhetorical / a question asked in order to create a dramatic effect or to make a point rather than to get an answer / used when saying or asking something rhetorically / “who cares? /rh””

“/hyp = hyperbole, exaggerated statements or claims not meant to be taken literally ; “i have a million things to do today”

“/sx = sexual intent, used when meaning something in a sexual way”,

“/nsx = nonsexual intent, used when meaning something in a not sexual way”,

“/pos = positive / used when saying something and meaning it in a positive way / “omg im gonna cry /pos”, implied they’re crying for a happy reason”,

“/neg = negative / used when saying something and meaning it in a negative way / “omg im gonna cry /neg”, implied they’re crying for an upsetting reason”, and

“/neu = neutral / used to show that what you’re saying is neutral or that you feel indifferent about it / “yeah i don’t care man do what you want /neu”, you don’t care about something but not in a mean or a negative way, you’re just indifferent”.

on a final note, HERE is a list of tone tags both in english and in other languages ( namely italian, spanish, portuguese, french, polish, german, lithuanian, serbian, dutch, indonesian, romanian, bulgarian, russian, hebrew, japanese, mandarin and korean !! ) and HERE are the list of sources about the content of tone tags !! i wish everyone reading this a lovely day !!

#** blog; mod angie.#** blog; mod post.#** blog; okay to reblog.#tw; long post #tw; sex mention

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hellzyeahwebwielingessays · 4 years

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Super Heroes are a HUMAN power fantasy Part 2

Super Heroes are a HUMAN power fantasy Part 1

Master Post

There were several points a bit more tangentially connected to my arguments in part 1. As a result I decided to leave them until now and hit them up in bullet points.

These are arguments against the superhero genre chiefly perpetuated by the tryhard trinity of Osvaldo Oyola , J. Lamb and Noah Berlatsky.

On the topic of the genre portraying ‘might making right’, the truth is this is part of the ancient inspirational aspect of these figures and can be found in stories like Rama and Sita, Rama of course ultimately never giving up his quest to be reunited with his lover. Which was not a Western influenced story.

Yes the genre involves ‘punching as conflict resolution’. I’m sorry, but that is part and parcel of the genre and the wish fulfilment/fantasy/narrative entertainment value of the stories. If you DON’T like that then frankly it’s like complaining that a romance story involves kissing.

It has been claimed that a black hero wouldn’t punch someone but again, the genre is entirely about people with powers using them to help people by preserving their life. And if they have no other choice but to K.O. a mugger who’s going to stab someone then a black person, or any decent person, would/should do it. But examining the meaning and repercussions of that realistically given the fact that they aren’t white in a white society is something that could benefit the genre.

A common critique of the genre is that crime happens sometimes because of a racist system, therefore fighting crime innately supports racism. Look, obviously we should remove institutionalised racism from the law. At the end of the day though if someone of any race is committing a crime which HURTS people they should be stopped, the reasons which drove them to that should be taken into consideration, but Spider-Man shouldn’t NOT stop a mugger because they’ve been driven to do that through desperation. There is often no time for that and without being able to talk to or trust strangers he or other heroes need to act in the moment.

Superhero fiction on one level is childish, but on a deeper level they’re representative of universal truths and desires which are often boiled down to fairy tales or simple stories. The above shitheads also claims that superhero fiction is written and consumed by children, when the truth is that in the last 20-30 years the opposite has been more true. THAT is partially why sales have been dwindling over the years.

Superman’s values are innate to the heroic and altruistic desires and ideals ALL humanity has expressed throughout its history. They are not inherently ‘white’

Apparently superheroes are white constructs because they reinforce the ‘status quo’. To quote the Atlantic article (see part 1) again:

“What status quo do superheroes reinforce? These heroes fight because everyone is entitled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. The only fascists here are the supervillains who disagree.”

Also Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman were created specifically to change the status quo of the fictional worlds they were created in. At the same time the entire Marvel pantheon were about changing the status quo of the genre by introducing people who were flawed and different and more human than the DC heroes

Superheroes, despite the assertions by the above fuckwits have at times interrogated the justice system. But generally their lack of interrogation is I think for the same reason their science is so wonky. They don’t know better. They just boil it down to the simplest terms. Muggings and villain threats abound. Hero prevents those. They don’t know enough to tackle something much deeper than that. This ties into the fundamentally flawed aspect of most critiques wherein they are looking to superheroes as intellectual pieces of academic and critical study when...that’s not what they are...at all…

One of the above douchebags once said:

An African American Superman, with kinky, close-cropped black hair, thick, half-reddened lips, high cheekbones, and wide nostrils all bathed in dark Lindt chocolate, resists White supremacist logic, negates Black inferiority mythology, and threatens the established order. Superman’s disconcerting physicality, tempered by his omnipresent cheerfulness calmed and invited White comic readers to imagine themselves as gaudy Caucasian perfection, the Anglo-Saxon ideal. Static in panel, without speech bubbles or thought balloons, Superman Black warps the absurdly developed skeletal striated muscle and eternal hopefulness fans rejoice into a clear and present danger to the American experiment, an unholy figure derived from Tea Party paranoia, Barack Obama’s calculation and Terry Crews’ musculature. Public Enemy’s prescience abounds – were Superman Black introduced on the game-changing Action Comics’ cover, White America would have yet another reason to fear a Black planet.

This entirely depends upon who is doing the perceiving. To someone of a different mindset a Black Superman could be just that. The same thing Superman is except he happens to have black skin.

Also, the author needs to take a major chill pill, Jesus Christ.

Here is another quote from one of them:

Only in White male power fantasies can people blessed with skin privilege and bodies carved from living marble wield heat vision or super speed or unbreakable claws against indigent criminals from broken homes who lack high school educations.

This is again grossly incorrect because the idea of individuals having superhuman abilities and using them to fight criminals predates American society, and if one accepts figures like the Hydra to be stand-ins for threats to human life then the superhumans have been fighting what the criminals represent for eons before the advent of American society. The criminals they use their abilities against are rarely stated to lack education or come from broken homes, but yes okay let’s say that they are that.

Having super humans go up against them and defeat them isn’t a white male power fantasy because their abilities are used to subdue and NOT kill. Injure perhaps but in real life sometimes force is sadly necessary and if someone is robbing a bank or holding a gun to someone in an alley it is justified no matter what skin colour anyone involved in is, or what society you find yourself in, for the perpetrator to be stopped in order to safeguard life. Just because the perp resorted to what they did due to social ills beyond their control, that doesn’t justify their actions at that moment. Stealing someone’s money or trying to murder them is never ever going to be acceptable no matter if we live in a white society or not.

Only in White male power fantasies would women display abundant porcelain cleavage or don starry microskirts to fight crime.

Yeah um, preeeeeeetty sure that actually that’s more of a male SEXUAL fantasy and less than a WHITE male POWER fantasy. That was never the topic of conversation.

Shuttle diplomacy or natural resource husbandry rarely bring metal-faced technological sorcerers to heel in superhero comics; superheroes often save planet Earth through fantastic violence judiciously applied.

Yeah, that’s part of the narrative FANTASY element of the genre that is intended to be escapist. Condemning it for being otherwise is asinine.

More than this, guess what, there are people whom Dr. Doom is a metaphorical stand-in for. And an awful lot of them legitimately can’t be negotiated with. I am of the belief that in the REAL world we should negotiate and use force when there is no other choice and even then only use what is necessary. But the Dr. Dooms and Lex Luthors of the comic book world represent grander themes of evil and social ills, whilst at the same time existing to challenge the heroes physically and mentally. They represent the unmovable types of evil that legitimately can only be dealt with via physical means.

This was the type of circular logic I talked about before. It is looking at the villains as stand ins for EVERY type of situation and therefore the super hero’s use of violence as ‘problematic’, when in reality the superheroes’ use of violence isn’t problematic because it is justified by the extreme circumstances they find themselves in.

Because those situations don’t exist in real life...like in World War II...which was literally about people using force in the face of failed negotiation to halt the advance of fascism…

I submit that the superheroic reflex to subdue evil with violence directly descends from Thucydides and Alexander, from Richard the Lionheart and Dwight Eisenhower.

Yeah...except it isn’t. Again...it came from the same place as Hercules and Sun Wukong, and those came from the natural human biological imperatives to survive.

Superheroic morality requires Western Civilization’s literary canon and political history to justify its callous disregard toward collateral damage. To be clear, superheroes routinely consider innocent noncombatants’ lives (if not their property) when they confront cosmic despots or sociopathic steroid abusers, but comics document the never-ending battle in colorful tomes largely sold after Nagasaki and My Lai, after the time when total ignorance of American military supremacy was vogue. When Wally West as the Flash pulls a hysterical single mother out of her overturned silver 2001 Honda Civic and carries her to safety from Apokoliptian cannons at breakneck speed, comic fans favorably regard his heroism; any dialogue from the frazzled thirty-something file clerk will remind readers how grateful she is to escape otherworldly horror with her life. Superhero comics don’t care about the destruction of this woman’s sole transport; when the gas tank explodes behind the Flash’s blurred strobe, this woman loses her credit cards, her driver’s license, her insurance documents, her six-year-old daughter’s vanilla birthday cake with its beloved artificially flavored strawberry icing. The comics don’t recognize the heroism of this brave woman’s seven-month struggle to rebuild her finances and maintain her identity following Darkseid’s incursion; all we know is for that poor woman, the Flash saved the day. He’s a superhero. Isn’t she grateful?”

Collateral damage and the disregard for it IS regarded. Hence the existence of Damage Control. Furthermore, that is AGAIN part of the escapism and fantasy element of it. THAT is the suspension of disbelief element of superheroes and taking it THAT realistically and criticising it for it is frankly just mean spirited and simply looking for an excuse to hate it.

Furthermore the reason the rescued woman isn’t focussed upon is because it’s not HER story. If you write a story about a protagonist THEY are your focus. Everything is for their benefit. That’s true of older non-white folktales as well.

And yeah readers are supposed to regard the Flash as heroic and the woman grateful because her kid’s birthday cake isn’t realistically as important as her life!!!!!!

This is criticising superhero fiction for being unrealistic even when it is being actively so The woman WOULD probably be grateful that she’s not fucking dead!

I wouldn’t mind seeing the survivors of something like this try to rebuild their lives. And superhero fiction has focussed upon that from time to time, but again...that’s not the point of the story. Criticising the genre fro this is like criticising Harry Potter for having the audacity to focus more upon Harry’s trauma in the wake of Cedric Diggory’s death than his parents’. Harry is the star. He gets the focus.

Superman is a White boy. Superheroes are White people. Superhero morality exacts the Melian Dialogue’s ‘might makes right’ overwhelming force realpolitik with every onomatopoetic Biff! Bam! Pow! gut punch and karate chop combo.

See what I’ve said before about how superheroes are not fascists and how force is often necessary

There exists no genetic propensity for group violence in the human genome. None.”

Er....yeah...there kinda is...that’s part of why wars happen.

racially-informed vigilantism.

This phrase in one of the articles itself sums up it’s own contradictions. Racially informed vigilantism is just one type of vigilantism, a type the superhero doesn’t subscribe to. A superhero would sooner join the likes of the Joker than the KKK style vigilantes and would be all too happy to apprehend them.

One of the articles seems to be conflating basically ALL criminals super heroes fight with people who’re labelled criminals due to racial profiling. Yes superheroes operate to an extent like police officers but you can’t truly complete the analogy whatsoever.

Few of them have legal sanction, which is partially why so many refrain from actually killing anyone as officer’s are allowed to do under certain circumstances. More than this when they take down criminals their methods are entirely different from regular cops. Apart from very loud and overt super villains who may or may not be on a rampage, most of the time when they tackle regular criminals it’s due to them either being informed of a crime that is going to happen (like a hijacking or something) or they literally see something happening whilst on patrol. They don’t profile people beyond what their super sensory abilities or logical observations tell them. Which is to say if someone is following someone else a little too closely then maybe, just maybe they are planning something. If their Spider-Sense or super hearing or something alerts them to something they will act.

Taking that, ignoring it, and then supplanting the superhero for a regular cop who would racially profile people and/or supplanting the criminals they tackle for racial minorities because those are the people who (stereotypically in the real world) would be targeted as criminals is very inappropriate. Not least of all since superhero comics obviously don’t present a wholesale realistic depiction of the real world so what they present isn’t entirely interchangeable with that. And what is more, erasure of minorities was so prevalent that overwhelming majority of all the criminals they ever encountered were themselves white, so again exchanging those for racial minorities who’re profiled as criminals is highly questionable.

It’s all just such a MASSIVE reach!

But I think the panels also work to point out that Miles himself “does not belong” in the superhero tradition. He, like most black and brown superhero characters in mainstream comics, is an outlier. In other words, people like Miles or Trayvon are unfortunately more likely to be victim of a “heroic” vigilante than to be one.

This is conflating the superhero vigilante with the majority of real world vigilantes who are overly violent (and frequently hard conservative) individuals who do take overly simplistic views of the law and use those to profile people. And it’s doing so whilst taking superheroes too literally, bringing their own personal interpretations to the mix and then overlaying them onto the superhero concept before finally accepting it as fact.

Police officers use violence against racially profiled people who exhibit unrest due to a societal system stacked against them. Well shit, Batman punches the Joker. It must be the same thing obviously!!!!!

Look. Without our stories, without the true nature and reality of who we are as people of color, nothing about fanboy and fangirl culture makes sense. What I mean by that is, if it wasn’t for race, X-Men doesn’t make sense; if it wasn’t for the history of breeding human beings through chattel slavery, Dune doesn’t make sense; if it wasn’t for the history of colonialism and imperialism, Star Wars doesn’t make sense; if it wasn’t for the extermination of so many indigenous nations, most of what we call “first contact” stories don’t make sense. Without us as the secret sauce, none of this works, and it is about time that we understand that we are the Force that holds the Star Wars universe together. We’re the Prime Directive that makes Star Trek possible. We are… in the Green Lantern Corps? We are the Oath. We are all of those things. Erased, and yet without us? We’re essential. This is an incredibly important project, because it puts front and center, not only a community that has long consumed and given power to these practices and consumer categories, but it’s a community without whose suffering and struggles, none of [these narratives] would make sense.

I agree with a lot of this but there are some problems with it.

a) X-Men makes sense also because they are a stand in for almost ALL marginalised groups. Racial minorities, disabled people, queer people etc.

b) Actually Star Wars makes complete sense with or without colonialism or imperialism, at least the kind which directly relates to the issues of racism. Imperialism, conquest, these are things which are much older than American society, dating back to even before Ancient Rome. It’s about freedom fundamentally and freedom is a desire shared by ALL human beings innately because at the end of the day we are animals who wish to be free and not caged. Being caged metaphorically within a tyranny is thus something we abhor

c) The Star Wars universe doesn’t begin and end with the story of imperialism. It’s about how Democracy can be turned into an dictatorship and how that has to be prevented, or re-addressed once it happens

When white comics readers claim that they did not need white characters to relate to and enjoy comics (as a way to argue against positive race-bending), that point to their love of Luke Cage or Spawn as evidence of their ability to enjoy characters across race, what they are failing to note is how black, Latin@, etc… identities in the superhero genre are framed by a system of white supremacy.

Again I don’t understand this one. I as a white reader can enjoy Luke Cage rescuing someone from a burning building because doing that is part of white supremacy????

It presumes a white power fantasy is inherently different to a black one. But the power fantasy element of the superhero relates to them having powers and using them to help others and defeat villains. A power fantasy by another race would still have that because it is inherent to the human power fantasy. Non-white power fantasies would logically have all that and more!

Much like Noah Berlatsky explains in his book Wonder Woman: Bondage and Feminism in the Marston/Peter Comics, 1941-1948, part of what made Marston’s original Wonder Woman stories so wonderful, was his expectation that girls and boys would identify with the heroine, to value and idealize her compassionate strength and victory through submission, rather than through cyclical and ultimately futile fisticuffs of male dominion.

Many female readers enjoy the action scenes. Action scenes are good because it enables us to have a healthy outlet for aggression without taking it out into the real world. It is also NOT an inherently male dominion thing. Again this is THEIR projection. Fighting and violence is innate to human beings because we are animals biologically programmed towards it for the sake of survival. That goes for males and females. Furthermore far from fisticuffs just being about male ‘dominion’ the Wonder Woman, Batman and Superman comics were a reflection of impending war. A war that sadly required violence to be solved. That’s what the superhero typifies. Wish fulfilment action in situations where violence was (usually) a necessity. Diplomacy is good and should be our first resort. In life though sometimes things do come down to necessary violence.

There are many ways to craft a racial minority superhero, but if we consider racial authenticity as a foremost concern, today’s Hollywood is simply not prepared for that intellectual labor. The real diversity conundrum isn’t how to include the minority metahuman in the existing comic framework; that’s an art project, a casting decision solved by calling Michael B. Jordan’s agent. The real question is how to write that superhero in a way that moves the medium forward, past the Reaganomics antiheroes of Alan Moore and Frank Miller and past the hyper-emotive Silver Age redux of Geoff Johns and Brian Michael Bendis. Respectable, authentic diversity in superhero comics should redefine the nature of the meta-protagonist to his powers and his audience, with exhaustive attention to cultural detail. I’m not convinced that a Black superhero would wear tights. I strongly doubt that a Black superhero would solve conflicts with his fists. The Black superhero knows that his community watches him religiously, and that any false move will have public repercussions he cannot expect or control. If anything, the Black superhero template plays out on our nation’s cable news channels at all hours. President Barack Obama, with all his clipped vocal inflections and measured language and natural equivocation and faulty dealmaking and perfect family and limitless patience is the closest public figure to a Black superhero America has yet experienced, an international celebrity unthinkable before his ascent. Watching President Obama today, one feels expectation crush into his bones like a gravity well. No matter the political stimuli, Republicans oppose him. The concept of the Obama Presidency struck American conservatives like a Bernard Hopkins’ kidney punch, and in return, President Obama absorbs the vitriol of our coarse public debates more than any President to date (and progressives never tired of calling his predecessor a National Socialist). The agony and the ecstasy of Grant Park has given way for many Americans to the sobering fact that American authority, her global military supremacy and international economic primacy, is controlled and represented by a Black man. Disliked, hated, or worse, the Establishment is Black. I need the Black superhero in print and/or on-screen to reflect that paradigm shift. Superheroes in the popular imagination are Establishment figures; if the Black superhero I’m presented can’t interrogate what it means when the Establishment is Black, of what utility is her story?

A minority hero wouldn’t wear tights or punch people...why?

What do tights have to do with anything? As for solving problems with his fists this is conflating the threats superheroes face with ANY threat, when they are almost always situations which legitimately do require necessary physical force to resolve. If the black superhero patrols an area and sees someone about to stab someone else, yeah he should punch the stabber to save the innocent person if there is no time for anything else.

This is basically asking for the core foundation of superheroes (which transcends racial constructs and is innate to human wish fulfilment and mythic tradition) to be scrapped in favour of something else entirely. Barrack Obama isn’t a superhero. He is many, many things but what Mr. Lamb here is asking isn’t so much for a different template but for something just wholesale different. He doesn’t actually WANT a superhero story in the first place!

Super heroes aren’t establishment figures. Superheroes don’t uphold the law regardless. They uphold the law in so far as a greater need to safeguard innocent lives. Conflating them as inherently establishment figures ignores their origins and over literalises what they do.

At the same time the utility of their story is first and foremost as a story: to entertain and inspire.

It is inherently worthwhile for a little black kid to sit down and open up a comic book where someone who looks like them is being a good person, is helping people, is defending the weak. I agree that minority heroes shouldn’t just be white heroes who happen to have different skin colours. I think they need to reflect the realities of what it means to be black or Asian or Pakistani in white society is necessary and a superhero should do that and should have that inform how they interact with their powers. It doesn’t mean the whole genre needs to abandon what it fundamentally is or that those minority heroes should not do the things a superhero fundamentally do.

Ultimately, yeah these characters were created within a white context, but my point is fundamentally the same thing was created in non-white contexts as well throughout history.

Super Heroes are a HUMAN power fantasy Part 1

Master Post

#Osvaldo Oyola #Noah Berlatsky #Marvel #DC #DC Comics #Marvel Comics #Super Heroes #Superheroes #Wonder Woman #Robin Hood

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wolfpawn · 4 years

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Pride and Prejudice, Chapter 34

Story Summary - Based on an idea I had that I submitted to Imagine Loki. Imagine Loki was raised on Jotunheim as Laufey’s son after the war, but an agreement was then made that he would wed Odin’s daughter so Odin could secure the alliance of Jotunheim through the marriage. Loki, in turn, was raised to be king of Jotunheim, but how he views Asgard is far different from how Odin’s daughter is raised leading to a clash of cultures as well as uncertainty between the pair of betrothed youths.

Chapter Summary - Loki and Ella discuss different matters before a turn in the conversation finishes it. When Loki goes to make plans to strike up the conversation again, the Norns scoff at his plans.

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Loki woke to the feel of someone moving in the bed next to him. Usually, the feel of Ella moving around did not bother him, but today he noticed that her body was closer than it usually was to him, more specifically, her waist was under his hand. Pulling back his hand slightly, he said nothing.

“Sorry, I did not mean to wake you.” Her voice was genuine.

“Fine, it’s fine. I’m awake,” Loki groaned as he rose in the bed.

“No, you’re not, you’re still half asleep. It’s early enough, get some more rest. The realm can wait,” Ella urged, not wanting to bother him. “You only got three hours of sleep.” “I’m fine,” Loki noted the time from her comment on how long he slept. The way she looked at him told him of a conflict in her own mind. “What?”

“Nothing.” She looked away.

“Do you, by any chance, know a spell to force people back to sleep?” He eyed her as he spoke, half worried at what she would say.

“A...Do you think I merely know one? I know several. Some a light slumber, some that would make you sleep for a year, why do you ask?” She tried to make it sound light, but she knew herself it did not lend itself to a light topic.

Loki, worried that she would attempt such a spell on him, shirked down into the bed again, eyeing her as he did. “How powerful are you?” “Why do you think that even after a thousand years and the ice not thawing in the situation between our realms, no pun intended, that your father was so keen for me to be your mate? I am more powerful than my parents, or at least them when my father does not have Gungnir, that sort of changes the dynamics slightly.” Loki continued to stare at her. “Do you actually fear me?”

“Last night you moved us from one room to the other without even a second thought.”

“Right? That is not exactly the scariest thing about me.”

Loki’s fear rose. “What can you do?” “I speared two daggers through a statue’s eyes and heart and a simple transportation spell bothers you?”

“Why do you know how to do that?”

“The daggers or the spell?” “The daggers?” “Did you never hear what happened four hundred years ago on Svartalfheim?” Loki shook his head. “My parents, Thor and I were on Svartalheim, nothing untoward, just having to do some sort of check, it is long abandoned, so my father thought we would go, see it, then head to Alfheim. Next thing we knew, we were surrounded, there was Sultur’s goons, weak but at least fifty. Thor and Father used force, Mother and I used seidr, but I was cut by a fire blade on my hip. Father was livid, with himself most of all, because it had been him who rubbished my mother’s claim that I needed to know how to defend myself physically. He stated I would never need to, yet had I not been so swift and capable with seidr, I would have lost my life that day. But a single lesson with a blade could have stopped me being scarred for life.”

Loki’s brows knit together. “What scar?” He did not take overly long to look at her naked body. During times that they were intimate, he did not take time to look for old wounds but he was certain he had not seen such a thing on her. “I hide it, with my seidr.” “Why?” “Because it is ugly.”

“Surely that is a matter of opinion? Some would say my markings are ugly.” “Your markings are as much a part of you as your eyes and lips, they are not the least bit ugly, nor are they the result of violent attacks,” She argued.

“Their being there and being ‘ugly’ is open to interpretation.” “Those who say otherwise are merely hateful. Unless the markings come up in some symbol of hate or a phallic shape, they could never be accused of such.”

Loki laughed at such an idea. “Norns, that would be unfortunate. Though there was one Jotnar apparently, a few millennia ago, who had a marking on, I think it was his leg, that had a likeness to the Dark Elf for ‘entrance’.”

“Depending on how far up his leg that was, it could be somewhat informative.”

Loki simply laughed again as Ella smirked playfully. “I have obtained a few scars over the years, I never thought to cover them.” “They blend in with your markings, so that does not count,” Ella retorted.

“Well, it cannot be that bad if you never got a limp or anything, so how bad is it really?”

Ella looked at the ground instead of looking at Loki. “I will leave you to get some more rest.”

Before Loki could dismiss her concerns or apologise for his comments, she left his room. He sighed and wondered if she would ever tell him or show something so intimate.

His plan was to speak more with her on the matter that evening, but Loki was beginning to realise something, the Norns laugh at the plans of mere beings.

Loki and the rest of the Jotnar were merely dealing with the realm in their own little ways when the roar of the Bifrost deafened them. He had been dealing with a matter with Arden that his father wished to have dealt with now that it was known another two Jotnar were in heat, it was clear the realm would need to be ready for a population boom and they wished to not deal with the matter too late and instead be fully prepared. Helibindi, having been told by Loki that Greta, a nice and sweet Jotnar, was interested in learning foreign manners of fun was at that moment in the company of said Jotunn doing said activities, the noise of the Bifrost causing her to bite his lip quite painfully in shock as it occurred. Laufey had been resting, his exhaustion as a result of his hard work the day before the tiredness caught up with him and going into a heavy sleep. The Bifrost, however, was so loud, it even woke him. Ella had been reading over something she wished to try and learn as a spell. It required concentration and silence and at the moment that the Bifrost erupted with a roar, she was relieved that she had not been at the part of the process which required her to concentrate the most but that relief was short-lived as she pondered worriedly as to why someone had used the Bifrost to come to Jotunheim.

Rushing through the palace, her fears increased as she saw a grouping of Jotnar, one of which was Arden and since she knew Loki had been in his company, she was unsurprised to see him a moment later beside him. What scared her was the burly blonde man she knew all too well in the middle of them. Running towards them, a few of the Jotnar, mostly guards, moved to give her a clear view of her brother, Loki, Helbindi and Arden, all of whom had very solemn faces on them, worrying her. As soon as Thor looked at her, she feared the worst.

“Father?”

“Far more grave I fear than an old King.” Ella shook her head slightly, not comprehending his meaning. “War, brutal and bloody.” “How?” “We cannot say for sure, but Alfheim will fall if we do not rally our allies today and join the fray and if they fall...” Thor began.

“Jotunheim is next.” Ella knew the position of the realms well, Midgard, Jotunheim and Alfheim were closest in location to one another, Jotunheim in the centre. “What are we to do?” “Father sent me here to explain everything, to get every Jotnar able to join us, the Einherjar await.”

Ella looked worriedly at Loki. She could see the determination in his eyes but also his fear. “How can I help?”

#pride and prejudice #Chapter 34 #loki fic

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hellreads · 4 years

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Chapters: 3/? Fandom: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jeon Jungkook/Reader, Kim Taehyung | V/Reader Characters: Jeon Jungkook, Kim Taehyung | V, Jung Hoseok | J-Hope, Kim Namjoon | RM, Min Yoongi | Suga, Kim Jinhwan, Kim Jisoo (BLACKPINK) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Werewolf Jeon Jungkook, Angst, Fluff, Smut, Cheating, there will be a love triangle whoops, tags will be added as the story progresses, Mutual Pining, Memory Loss

Summary:

In a world of supernatural beings, a normal human like yourself always found attraction and wonder towards these creatures. It was your kind heart that led you to become a doctor to treat such people. And it was your kind heart that led you into the arms of a young Alpha wolf who will accidentally force you down a path you were never meant to follow...

“...I don’t remember him, and I know how I’m supposed to feel but…” “This is what feels right to me.”

after a long battle with my reader’s block this is the first fic that I finished in one go and I found myself falling in love with reading again and I may have fallen for werewolves and warlocks too along the way. anyways, I highly suggest you listen to Walk Through the Fire by Zayde Wolf ft. Ruelle before you start reading to set the mood, also, if you aren’t familiar with Howl’s Moving Castle (well I highly suggest you read/watch this because this is gold!) you could google Howl Jenkins Pendragon to have an idea of Taehyung’s visual inspiration for this fic.

[SPOILERS AHEAD - this is me telling this story to my close friends, this is how i chat them my latest reads, in detail with a lot of inserts in between gasdhjgfakjs also rip this is an essay it’s been awhile since i shared my thoughts~]

I shouldn’t be babbling like this since this is an on-going story but whatever I’m so in love with this so please bear with me, I actually had this fic saved on my reader for weeks, found this one fateful night when I was craving to hurt my heart with an infidelity fic so I browsed and filtered ao3 results and got this and last night I clicked the title because I assumed this is inspired by Zayde Wolf’s song (which I fell for because of a zombie fic that had this on it’s playlist) and I devoured this like a starved woman and I ~

so this actually escalates quickly from Jungkook and MC’s first meeting filled with some bicker and banter, to meeting Namjoon and Jungkook while she’s with her best friend Jisoo well MC is not afraid of the supernatural so they wanted to test her how she’ll react to Jungkook’s true form and she’s up for it and then everything happened all at once, in that moment Jungkook found comfort in her, she was her mate...

so this is where it’ll start to hurt and I kinda understand and not understand Jungkook’s logic here maybe it’s because he’s a wolf? or his prior experiences with other human’s changed him? the lack of sexual intimacy started all of this mess, If only Jungkook tested the waters and tried talking to MC if she wants to do it and they could take it slow but also he’s a supernatural, a wolf, and he’ll most likely lose control once he gets to have a taste of her and it’s probably one of his concerns that’s why instead of mating with her and marking her he decided to spend the night with wolves from his own pack, srsly my heart dropped when she saw what’s happening in his bedroom, she was ready to seduce him and step up her game BUT no he was fucking cheating on her, I get that he’s in heat and it’ll be wild and he’ll probably hurt MC but whyyyy Jungkook? after reading that scene I knew I would hate him...

hate is a strong word but that’s how I felt and I just wish somebody would find and save her, based on the tags I made up scenarios in my head, I had no clue about Taehyung being a warlock so I was kinda hoping he’s a human that’ll sweep her off her feet BUT the scenario that followed was much better and adds so much *chef’s kiss* flavor to the story, so Taehyung is a warlock, like Howl Jenkins Pendragon (well he’s a wizard dealing with general/good magic while warlocks are associated with black/dark magic yet Tae is vv chill so far~), my favorite studio ghibli character, I was so ecstatic reading his description plus a few elements from the story/movie were also incorporated into the story that’s why i’m so so so happy, so fast forward to MC waking up in Taehyung’s place (I actually forgot to mention I was kinda relieved that Irene and Bo Young didn’t tell Jungkook the whole story [for added drama yasss!] but I guess if he really care about her he would’ve felt it in him that she’s somewhere and he needs to do everything in his power to seek her and not just let his guilt eat him while he fucks his lust, sigh Jungkook you fucked up badly, wait til...) so this is where you’ll start to fall for Taehyung (because that’s what happened to me) everything they did made my heart flutter it was just some flirting here and there and genuine concern from Taehyung wanting to help MC regain her memories, again, I was a little embarrassed and hurt for MC when she told Tae “What if I want to touch you?” and got a response “You’ll just have to resist,” poor babe she just wants to feel something ~ idk how warlocks are in fics during sex maybe they’re dangerous too that’s why Taehyung is trying his best to resist and ignore her flirting whenever it gets too much he wants to give in.

now that readers like me have fallen for Taehyung and was hoping for a better future for MC ~ hmmm just a random thought wouldn’t it be nice to lose your memories when your partner cheats on you? and they still have every single detail of the horrible things they’ve done while your mind is free of pain, you get to retain the feeling and lessons learned but you have no clue what life experience brought you that wisdom, ahhh beautiful, I love when people suffer and pay for their sins.~ Namjoon suddenly shows up and does everything to take MC back to Jungkook and he fails then tells him everything and now he just wants to find her, still shocked that if she really was her mate and loves her ughhh he’d get the feeling that she’s still alive unless Taehyung had some protective spell cast on her while he helps her get better? idk my mind is filled with so many questions and possibilities and i’m suffering.

Chapter #3 so this is how it goes huh? she reunites with her best friend that helps her reunite with her “boyfriend” ngl I was hoping she’d be able to spend more time with Taehyung, that he will take her and fulfill his words “Then you can continue being my Love.” I want her to be happy with Taehyung, she belongs with him, that’s why things happened and Jungkook failed to mark her because he was busy with marking others ughhh, okay I appreciate Jungkook’s gesture and sincerity to make it up to her but once her memories come rushing back things will never be the same, it’ll only prove her that her feelings were right, being with Taehyung, that’s what’s right. but since we're only 3 chapters in i’m looking forward to having our hearts swayed back in forth into Jungkook then Taehyung and back to Jungkook and rolling and jumping back to Taehyung until we’re perpetually torn and confused.

I just want to be back in Taehyung’s arms (that’s the immersive me talking) | 🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒

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bionicallywriting · 4 years

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Prompt: Hermione/Bill, pining

Word Count: 1712

For @frumpologist

Scant Love Not

While flowering, ladies, scant love not

Lest all your fruit

Be but this black outcrop of stones

—Sylvia Plath, Two Sisters of Persephone

As someone who prided herself as an intellectual, it was perhaps appropriate that Hermione would be knocked off her lofty perch by a massively inexplicable infatuation.

She had always admired Ron’s tall, broad-shouldered build; he had the type of naturally athletic figure that sent very unintellectual butterflies fluttering in her stomach. He looked like how a man should; strong, tall, with the bluest eyes she had ever seen on a person. It was not—well, unnatural that she should develop a tiny crush on him. They had grown up together, after all, and what girl hadn’t fantasised about marrying her childhood sweetheart?

It was just a pity that they weren’t interested in the same things at all and that most of their conversations were so contentious that she was annoyed for weeks afterwards. Everything she said seemed to set Ron off and vice versa. Sometimes she found him so irritating that she wanted to hex his face off.

Then Hermione met Bill Weasley.

Suddenly she understood her infatuation with Ron was just a small, miniscule shadow of the real thing.

It was terrible to compare brothers. Hermione knew this. Ron was the last of the brothers, and Bill had been the first, the scion, the bright star in the happy horizon of Molly and Arthur’s blissful nuptials. Their upbringing would have been completely different, and yet—

—And yet, Hermione couldn’t help seeing in Bill all the things she had admired in Ron, and more.

Everything about Bill Weasley was just more. He was the best looking of the brothers, with a cleancut, chiseled jawline that Hermione couldn’t help but peer at and admire secretly. Less superficial than his looks, however, was his intelligence, his love of books and knowledge, and his gentlemanly chivalry. Everything about him was just more, more, more, and Hermione couldn’t help but compare every single boy she met after that to him.

It was unfair. She knew this. He was almost a decade older. She knew this too. He was completely out of her league since she was still in school and his little brother’s friend. She knew all of this.

—And yet, it didn’t dim her infatuation. Not one bit.

xxx

Every year that Bill remained single was another year in which Hermione hoped and prayed to grow up to be his equal. It was hard not letting her fantasies get out of control when he finally announced his intention of returning to Gringotts in London.

This was a sign—wasn't it?

The logical part of Hermione's brain had gone on permanent vacation, replaced by someone who had perpetual heart eyes whenever she thought of Bill Weasley. It got so bad that her relationship with Ron was more acrimonious than ever. Before, she had swallowed her ire in favour of diplomacy, but now that civility had been exchanged for a coldness that rivaled first year animosity. Harry, bless his heart, submerged in the troubles of the Tournament and on the outs with Ron, didn’t even notice.

She no longer waited for Ron to step up and be a man anymore—no, she had someone else in mind for that. When Viktor Krum asked her to the Yule Ball, it hadn’t been with Viktor in mind that she accepted. In the back of her mind, she had thought, older boys liked her. They found her attractive. Wouldn’t he also?

She was turning ugly and dark on the inside, but the grip of a teenage infatuation was strong, overpowering. She was doodling his name on her notebooks rather than notes from class. Something inside her told her she was being unfair to Ron, that she should do something to heal the rift between him and Harry, but her mind was focused on other things. Other possibilities for the future. A meeting between two minds.

Surely he’d see her. He’d really and truly see her, not as a little girl, but as an equal.

xxx

It was a shock when Ginny first mentioned that Bill was dating Fleur Delacour.

He couldn’t. Hermione listened with white-lipped shock.

“Two months now,” Ginny said with a grimace. “Ugh, I can’t stand her.”

Ginny had a fairly good relationship with all her brothers, but with Bill and the age gap between them, there was a special bond. She was filled with acrimony at the interloper Fleur. She was haughty, she was snooty, she thought everything about England was terrible—then why didn’t she simply go away and leave Bill alone?

In her thudding heart, Hermione couldn’t agree more. “Maybe it’s not serious.”

“Merlin, I hope not.” Ginny rolled her eyes at herself in the mirror and added another layer of lip gloss. “I couldn’t stand her during the Tournament, what with Ron following her everywhere, but now this is even worse.”

It was much worse. Hermione remembered Fleur’s unnatural effect on Ron, and her heart sank. What if—what if the Weasleys were more susceptible to Veela than other wizards? Harry hadn’t been as affected, after all, nor some of the other boys in class. Ron—perhaps Ron had been a special case?

Ron wasn’t a special case, and Bill proved it by proposing to Fleur over the disapproval of his mother.

“They were going to live abroad, but then Bill decided to settle down in England.” Despite her gloomy air, Ginny managed to pop an astounding three Cauldron cakes at a time into her mouth. “I hope they’re not going to live at home. I can’t stand to have all of my brothers mooning over her. What makes her so special anyway?”

“She’s—”

“She’s not even that pretty. It’s completely the Veela thing, because all the other girls in school thought she was too bony and pointy-looking. Kind of like a bird, if you ask me.”

“It’s not the looks,” Hermione said, remembering what had been in her textbook.

“I know.” Ginny’s subdued response was almost covered up by the rustling she made digging around inside the snack box. “I know. It’s the allure. They could be as ugly as a troll, and nobody would care.”

“Yeah.” Hermione was feeling fairly gloomy herself. If someone like Fleur, who was already thin and elegant and pretty, had on top of that the allure of a Veela, what chance did bookish, frizzy-haired Hermione have? None. Added to it all was her age. She was fifteen. The distance, in mere numbers, meant nothing to her, but in practical terms, Bill could have physically been on the moon itself.

“Let’s hope she latches onto someone else.” Ginny tossed the empty cauldron cake box across the room towards the rubbish bin.

Hermione turned to watch the box spin a little before going in the bin. She turned and smiled at Ginny before shaking her head. “Will she though? I mean, Bill’s pretty—” She caught herself before she spilled out all her feelings towards him. She bit her tongue before continuing. “He’s a really good catch.”

“I know. He’s tall, he’s good-looking, he’s extremely charming. He even makes a lot of money at Gringotts, much more than she does, since she’s just starting out. I just don’t see how she could find someone better, considering that she’s part-Veela, and—” Ginny’s voice dropped to a stage whisper “—not exactly acceptable to a lot of Purebloods.”

Then what chance do I have? Hermione thought mournfully to herself. Aloud, she could only repeat her words again, “Yeah. I know.”

xxx

They were married.

Before the bridal party came down, Hermione bumped into Bill outside near the marquee.

“Beg pardon,” Bill said instinctively, hands clasping Hermione on the upper arms to steady her. He glanced down and smiled, as though only realising it was her. “Oh, Hermione, how are you?”

“Good, good.” Hermione felt and sounded, to her own ears, a little breathless.

“You look lovely in that dress.” Bill was smiling in his usual open, charming way. Hermione thought miserably that any children Bill and Fleur were bound to have would have an unnaturally unfair advantage over the rest of the population.

“Thank you,” she said, keeping her eyes down so that her love for him wouldn’t shine through so obviously. Her fingers twisted at a fold in her skirt.

“I’ve heard from Ron that—well, you’re probably the only reason those two are still alive and kicking, aren’t you?” His voice lowered, as though imparting a joke, and a sliver of awareness crawled up Hermione’s spine.

“Oh, I’m sure that’s vastly overstating my—contributions.” She was floundering for small talk. This was misery, and yet she did not want it to end.

“Anyway, thank you for helping out. This can’t be that much fun for you.”

“It’s—nothing,” she said, her voice trailing off as his attention was called away. Hermione was left staring after his disappearing figure. The pangs she put into her own appearance seemed silly now. Had she truly wanted him to see what he was missing? She felt like an idiot now.

She felt even worse when the ceremony started, and Fleur came through the archway looking like a fairy princess. She glowed so brightly that she might have been an actual celestial star passing through the darkness of their presence. When everyone watched and gasped over Fleur’s appearance, all Hermione’s attention was fastened on Bill’s profile. Her heart twisted inside her chest.

She wished with all her might that he was looking at her in that way.

#fairest of the rare #lovefest2020 #teamaphrodite #rare pairs #bill weasley #Hermione Granger #bill x hermione #drabble #writing #my works #harry potter fanfiction

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