#it’s that I’m making movie references and stupid jokes that are probably only funny to me

[grandpabug]

The labeling of my non-transparent fridge produce bins has grown complex. I live alone btw :)

#liamthought #u guys suck I can’t believe these flopped :( #actually adhd #adhd brain #actually audhd #audhd things #audhd brain #actually autistic #I drew these while forgetting about my hot pasta dinner #it was cold by the time I emerged from post it world #listen y’all I have adhd and I cannot remember that there’s something to look for in the bin unless there’s some kind of exterior indicator #I’d been just writing ‘apples’ but that was boring #so then I would draw an apple and write apples #but then I was like well! we don’t really need the word if the picture is there huh #and it’s like that fucking story about the hat shop sign where eventually the guy asks for nothing on it #except for me #it’s that I’m making movie references and stupid jokes that are probably only funny to me #but that’s just as well bc I have no roommates to see teen #wizard of oz #doodles

[liverralonee]

okay okay wait hear me out.

stu was allowed to watch spongebob as a kid - he LOVED that shit, thought it was hilarious and quotes it everyday (barely anyone knows what hes saying😭)

billy wasnt allowed to watch it, so it turned him into spongebobs biggest hater, and will audibly sigh and get all irritated whenever stu mentions it

sidney wasnt allowed either, but she didnt care, she’d watch it sometimes at a friends house, but she was indifferent to the show in general; will occasionally laugh at stus stupid jokes

tatum was allowed, and she loved it, but she grew out of it and doesnt mention it every other second (cough stuart cough) but she catches every reference stu says and finds them funny

randy was also allowed, but didnt care for the show. he probably thought it was childish and unfunny, and lowk hates on it w billy sometimes, only he actually knows the show and isnt just blindly hating on it

(also, one time in private, stu made a spongebob related joke and billy actually LAUGHED. stu hasnt ever let him live it down and uses it as black mail from time to time to get what he wants)

HELP I LOVE THIS SM i love random scream headcanons they’re so funny

i think stu just knows pop culture like really well. like any kind of kids tv show? he’s seen at least an episode. sit coms? seen them. like any movie ever? he’s seen that shit

like it is insane how much this boy knows he gets any reference to anything but also lowkey gets slightly annoyed when other people don’t get it like fym you haven’t seen every single episode of jimmy neutron? (i’ve never seen it guys )

i feel like billy’s mom was cool with him watching mostly anything but she had like some very specific cartoons she didn’t want him watching , again, for really stupid reasons. soooo, stu brings it up and billy’s just a hater 😭 he’s a hater on most things tho so it’s not that crazy but stu’s a huge spongebob fan like he cannot believe this. this is hate. discrimination even.

i’d see sidney and tatum having about the same reaction to stu’s jokes except as you said, sid doesn’t actually know what he’s on about she’s just trying to go along with the joke and laugh it as if she knows what’s going on. hc that when stu and tatum first became friends she didn’t know any other thing that stu was interested in other than spongebob so that’s all they ever talked about 💀

and randys just… sigh. ily randy sm but i feel like he either enjoys something or absolutely hates it😭 like in scream 2 with how much of a hater he is when it comes to sequels like if he hates something, he DESPISES THAT SHIT HE CANNOT SPEND IT LMFAO. so stu makes a joke and randys just like “stu’s at it again”

i feel like before randy got into the whole like hating billy at any moment he gets, i feel like he actually tried being friends with billy but it just didn’t work cause billy doesn’t like anyone 😭 so stu makes another spongebob joke and randys like “oh my god. did you see that billy? he’s at it again” and billy just ignores him cause he does NOT wanna be friends with randy

i’m getting off topic but yeah i feel like randy tried to be friends with billy but uhhhh, it didn’t work very well.

also the billy laughing at stu’s joke i feel like it’s happened multiple times but it’s very rare. he has to be in a REALLY good mood 😭 but it’s probably happened a few times and stu does not let him move on from it even years later

#not spell checked at all #rant #sorry #scream 1996 #stu macher #billy loomis #randy meeks #sidney prescott #tatum riley

[luminouslotuses]

my (hopefully) coherent thoughts about mean girls! spoilers ahead ofc👍

music:

the songs weren’t that bad! sexy, world burn, apex predator, and meet the plastics were my faves

my least favorite was stupid with love though,, the production makes it so boring i’m sorry😭

<-but what i will say is that the stupid with love reprise performed at the spring fling SLAPPED. why can’t that be on the soundtrackk

i feel like a lot of emotion that the original songs had is lost here. whether it be the production or the vocals accompanying it or both; i feel like they go hand in hand. reneé auli’i & jaquel definitely brought the energy that was needed here

the choreography & visuals that went with the songs definitely made them better than simply listening to the soundtrack on its own. like i was much more invested in what ifs & revenge party for example– and i already liked someone gets hurt, but the VISUALS??? holy shit that scene was incredible

i really wish a few songs were kept from the show like any of damian’s or that the someone gets hurt reprise in the movie was included in the soundtrack. hell i kind of wish do this thing was kept because i think that would’ve gone so hard at the end for some inexplicable reason pfft

and of course these can’t top the original broadway versions, nor did i expect them to. also sometimes the production or mixing was either bland or off (like in world burn reneé’s vocals are a second or two behind the backing track at one point, which is super weird since it’s fine in the soundtrack but i digress lmao)

cast/characters:

the cast have great chemistry they’re all so talented they’re so fucking funny aghh the casting was perfect

reneé as regina made me gayer somehow. Not surprised there

AVANTIKA. she was soso perfect as karen!! so funny so insanely pretty and she did sexy so much justice

okay admittedly i was a little unsure about angourie as cady. only at first though because once she became part of the plastics she played that role so well

speaking of cady that scene when regina’s singing in the cafeteria and cady’s staring at her is actually the gayest thing i’ve ever seen hands down

ms. norbury & mr. duvall are in a relationship. they have dogs at home. janis said (jokingly) that they got wasted at the spring fling. they are My straight couple i love them so fucking much

ough the bond between cady and her mom is so sweet and even emotional at one point i really like it

the band always seeming to be around and playing is so good especially when they’re in the tree in that one scene lol

i knew lindsay lohan would be there somehow and her being the proctor for the math competition was golden. (also her lines like “this has only happened once more”<-referencing the original movie & then the “i don’t know your life” to cady were SOOO)

miscellaneous:

so happy some of the jokes and moments from the musical were in the movie. like “homeschooled? oh that’s a fun way to take jobs from my union!” & mr. duvall’s retainer case & the bathroom scene with cady & regina lol

i was thinking they’d go overboard with the social media aspect (like a lot of media typically tends to do when making a movie like this) but i was pleasantly surprised! yes it was definitely a large part of many scenes but i think it mostly worked & made sense. but then again this is tina fey so she knows what she’s doing lmao

it’s best to not have any expectations when walking into this movie; nothing too high, nothing too low. i probably like it more than the average person as i’ve always loved the broadway musical but still. if you want to see it i say go for it! it has a great cast, songs that range from bland & perfectly serviceable to great with exceptional vocals (coughs. Reneé), and some nice references and moments for fans of the original movie, the musical, or both. it was fun time and i could tell there was heart put into it🫶

#mean girls #my ted talk

[inkedmyths]

S1: E17 “Hell House”

Brought to you by I really should have known better than to link my blog in a server, huh

The episode featuring: Ghost hunters, the power of storytelling, prank wars, and Blue Öyster Cult

Lets make this hell house into a hell home

We are in Texas baby! Yeeeeeeehaw

[ Kayla asks if I'm really starting during the Anonpocalypse. The answer is yes. ]

Classic horror beginning. 3 guys and a girl investigate a haunted house. They probably die

"Only goes after girls" classic

[ Crepe realizes something, and tells Kayla. They both start cheering excitedly. Melon joins in. Apparently this episode begins the "best gimmick". I am scared. ]

Behiiiiind yoooou

OH THAT GIRL IS STRAIGHT UP DEAD

Oh look Sam take a nap

DEAN YOU ARE DRIVING LEAVE YOUR NAPPING BROTHER ALONE

Lmao Dean bopping to the music

LMAO yea actually I want more Winchester prank wars

Oh first a racist truck, now a misogynistic ghost? Fun

Getting high behind a Dennys?

[ Crepe: It's not like Denny's is a real place. ]

Oh. Oh no.

4 stupid teens young kids....

Ah. Lovely. A dad that murdered his 6 daughters. Joy.

Thats fair kid. Don't go near the house! Be smarter than past you was!

Oh the old fuse box thing is messing with the EMF? Interesting

Oh cool Satanist lore

"This is exactly why you never get laid" hey Dean some people like a nerdy guy

[ Kayla: Like Dean, for instance. Am I saying he's a nerd, or that he likes nerdy guys? Yes. ]

"I have... somewhere..." Dean that's ominous

LMAO ghost hunters

LMAO THEY'RE THE WEBSITE PEOPLE

Oh no

HELP

EMF, BUT

Is. Is this the bit

Ohhh my god thats so funny

HAHAHA

Sam gottim gooooood

Winchester prank war

Oh more stupid young people

This chick is highly likely to die

Chicken feets

Girl noooo

Oh yep there she goes. Hung like a Christmas Ornament

SUICIDE YEAH RIGHT

Oh no

DUMBASS GHOST HUNTERS

HAHAHAHA THEY GOT THE COPS TO CHASE THE GHOST HUNTERS

Where have you seen that symbol Dean. Thats Ominous

DHSGSG DEAN DARING SAM TO TAKE A SWIG OF THE JAR

Djdhdhdh rats

WOOOAH SPIRIT

IMMUNE TO ROCK SALT?

WHAT IS THAT

Oh look its the ghost hunters

That symbol huh...

Dean: I thought the legend said Mordecai only goes after chicks?

Sam: He does.

Dean: Well that explains why he went after you, but why me?

Sam: Hilarious.

Oh? The record shop?

BLUE OYSTER CULT LMAO

Ohhh so it was faked originally lmaooo

Ok, so it was a joke, so where did the haunting come from?

[ Melon says all it takes is a good speaker to make a joke cult turn into a real movement. Crepe says "Megatron". Queen thinks this is hilarious. Who the fuck is Megatron? ]

Dean. Dean what are you doing

Is thay like itch powder

LMAO IT ISN'T IT

Ohh so its some kind of thought monster

Which is why it keeps changing! Ohh that is pretty cool

LMAO THE ITCHING POWDER GOD

Obsessed with this ongoing prank war they're so stupid

Dumbass ghost hunters

"Sex! ...With girls" why are you specifying

What Would Buffy Do

LMAO THEY ARE BAITING THEM WITH INFO

Ohhhh thats so smart

LMAO the weird laughing thing

GLUED HIS HAND

DAMMIT why do their prank wars have to be so funny

WHDHDHSHSHS THEY BROUGHT THE THING WITH THEM???

They are so ready to shoot this thing

What a great fight scene actually

Yeah just set it on fire, thats the best bet

"Of all the things we've hunted, how many of them exist just because people believed in them?" Wow

THEY'RE MAKING A MOVIE/GAME ABOUT IT. THESE GUYS ARE. WOW.

SAM YOU LITTLE SHIT

DEAN YOU'RE ALSO A LITTLE SHIT

Thats so funny though

It is iconic. Fake producer call and a dead fish in the backseat.

-

Ok. Fine. Sam and Dean are funny I love the stupid prank war and their refusal to stop even during an ongoing investigation. This is exactly the dynamic that I enjoy. Goddammit.

VERY interesting concept this episode, and raises some interesting questions about how the supernatural comes to be in this universe.

ANYWAYS I SEE THE NEXT TITLE. I LOVE MACBETH REFERENCES.

#on the highway to superhell #im almost thru s1 i think. yippee! #OK FINE. THEY'RE AT LIKEABLE CHARACTER STATUS. KAYLA ISTG DONT YOU DARE—

[tensecondstomidnight]

on to Show and Tell! back to an OG 4-pager with this one!

i bet this is the chapter that originally introduced lucy’s deaf ear! i mean, they haven’t really brought it up since the prologue chapter, i think.

CHILL MAN

we’ve got some great faces in this one. the eyes in the early pages are so appealing to me, we’ve got the dot eyes and the “kirby eyes” (pictured above) and then we get that sorta fusion of them that kinda looks like the eyes i draw!

see, like that. also what’s this about girly romance movies? BRING THAT BACK!!! that would be such a cute reference omgggg

anyways yeah, the bit of this chapter is genetics and the different species of the cats! lucy’s deaf ear is attributed to her being a blue-eyed white khao manee, which reflects real life! lucky that she didn’t lose it in both of them. they do a cute bit where yashy thinks her own blue eyes will turn her deaf. i really miss jokes like that, the pets are so cute...

RELAX

anyways mike’s a korat (makes a point of being like “surprised im not a russian blue?” which after looking at them im kinda surprised too!) and daisy comments that she thought mike was a british blue shorthair because he’s “so intellectual.” first of all, he’s totally not a british shorthair and daisy is stupid, but more importantly, what an interesting lore bit this is! everybody is so knowledgeable about cat breeds (makes sense! they’re cats!) but they also have preconceived biases about people of those breeds, likely based on common traits those breeds share in the real world. if you wanna overthink it a bit, daisy just racially profiled mike! looks like yashy is taking the second-place for racism this time around.

daisy is half selkirk rex and half ragamuffin. looking at pictures of those cats, it seems like she represents her breed best when she’s been out in the rain for a bit! she must put a lot of work into those curls.

check out this sequence at the end of page 3. this is soooo cute! lucy getting so visibly envious of someone else getting attention from mike feels like a rarity...

paulo shows up to boast about his breed too! the more they compare their genetics, the weirder it feels. but in a goofy way, because it’s all obviously so lighthearted! paulo is a somali, and the way his breed looks in real life reminds me of a warrior cats character. he mentions his dad is “kinda lion-ish,” can’t wait to see that guy. i headcanon him as sounding like bob from bob’s burgers.

this is another really cute sequence. i like seeing mike and lucy just be friends. sooo cute... and LOOK AT DAISY!! THE SPELL CANNOT BE BROKEN!! PAULO IS TOO COOL!! i’m huge on paulo x daisy so i’m probably gonna gush like that whenever i see them together, haha

the following panels are also such a fun microcosm of what paulo and lucy are. it’s like, the easiest way to explain their dynamic to someone. so perfect!

anyways, yashy claims to be a golden retriever (obviously unintentional but it reminds me of all those “attack helicopter” jokes from like 2016) and david shows up asking to hook up with the supposed golden retriever, only to see yashy and blanch, somehow avoiding getting called the p-word. i wonder why mike gets singled out so much? poor guy.

in the final panel, we get a really funny david drawing and they toss in sue and amaya’s breeds for us to gobble up like the LEECHES we are. obviously, sue is a european burmese, but she’s missing some of the markings you might expect from a cat like her. amaya is a super obvious tabby though, she’s right.

i figured i wouldn’t have much to say about this chapter, since it’s pretty one-note. i’m fine with putting it all in one big post! NEXT TIME: Gone Fishing!

#scratch.txt #reread #bittersweet candy bowl #bcb #lucy #yashy #mike #daisy #paulo #david #sue #amaya #show and tell

[theodorebasmanov]

I’ve watched “Beetlejuice” and this time it’s finally the musical. I enjoyed it so much! It’s very funny! It has a lot of references in the lyrics and texts including musical theatre references, I even heard a “Hello, Dolly” reference and it surprised me! Did I mention how amusing it is? It’s hilarious! It has so many good jokes! The music and lyrics are cool! I’m probably going to download the full soundtrack. (For the statistics, from more than one hundred musicals I’ve watched for the last a little more than a year I’ve loaded more than two songs from only thirteen.) They changed the plot a little from the original movie focusing more on Beetlejuice himself and Lydia, than on the Maitlands. That’s why we see some more loneliness and depression problems elucidation. The production is also something that surprised me – a huge sandworm! On stage! So, yes, a great thing, I understand why everybody loves it so much (I’ve noticed a lot of animatics and other content online). P.S. I wanted to make a stupid little joke that I hope that Sophia Anne Caruso (Lydia) will play Veronica (Sawyer, from “Heathers”) one day but didn’t know where to put it, so I’m putting it here (I think I’m like the millionth person who made that joke).

#musical #musical theatre #beetlejuice #beetlejuice musical #lydia deetz #adam maitland #barbara maitland #charles deetz #delia schlimmer #alex brightman #sophia anne caruso #rob mcclure #kerry butler

[frogtanii]

embarrassed ft. matsukawa issei

wc. 2.7k (???)

warnings. SMUT, not proofread lol, mutual pining (??), friends to lovers (???), cunnilingus lmao, no dom/sub dynamics, well actually dom&sub issei if you squint rlly hard hehe, kinda cute, embarrassed issei <3, also one (1) WAP reference

an. it’s 2:30 am and i have no idea why i wrote this and who for???? i got the idea from a 🦋😳🙈✨ audio and was immediately inspired idk, sorry if it’s bad i lichrally have no idea since i didn’t read it after it was done :p

( ˘ ³˘)♥︎

it wasn’t like matsukawa issei to be embarrassed.

he was handsome, intelligent, and funny, not to mention he never left women wanting after a night with him.

issei was the entire package and he knew it.

beyond superficiality though, he was happy with his life. he had a great group of friends, a nice apartment all to himself and a completely normal job.

yes, being a funeral home employee wasn’t the most glamorous career a person could have but he was happy. besides, it never deterred him from getting a warm body to sleep with which was a win in his book.

all in all? his life was great!

so why did he have to go and screw it all up?

issei blames makki and the dumb flyer for the reason his life went to shit. (maybe he’s being a little dramatic, but let him have his oikawa moment.)

he was minding his own business when his best friend (recently turned enemy) burst through his apartment door with a piece of paper in his hand and a fire in his eyes.

“dude, look at this!” issei rolled his eyes, putting down his casket catalogue and turning to meet takahiro’s gaze.

“why hello to you too. remind me why i gave you a key again?”

“because you love me and because i bring shit like this to you. look!” with another long and suspiciously tooru-like sigh, issei took the crumpled paper from makki and immediately stopped in his tracks.

“makki... what the fuck is this?”

written in large pink letters and a flowery, borderline illegible font was the name, coffee and cunnilingus. upon further inspection and careful reading, it revealed itself to be a little cafe opening up about 10 minutes from issei’s apartment complex who were looking to hire “young, attractive men who are proficient at eating pussy.”

issei could feel his eyes narrow and his mouth drop open in shock as he repeated his question. “the fuck is this?”

makki shook his head excitedly, tapping to another portion of the flyer that matsukawa had not yet read. “no, no dude, just look at how much they’re paying per hour.” issei begrudgingly obliged but the minute his eyes touched the (Massive™) number, he felt a little faint.

it was a lot of money. more than the funeral home was paying, that’s for sure. with that kind of money he could move out of this suddenly dingy seeming apartment and into a nice flat in the city were he’d always wanted to live. maybe he could buy himself a nice watch or even a high-end suit to replace the one from his highschool graduation (aka the only suit he owns). with that kind of money, he could erase his student debt 3 years ahead of schedule and get his mom into a nicer place.

it was these thoughts that clouded issei’s head as he found himself standing in front of a cute looking building, matching the address on the flyer. i’ll only be working part time, he thought as he pushed the door open to reveal an equally impressing interior with curtained booths and a wide variety of coffee on the menu. i’m only doing it for extra money, he thought as he shook the owner’s hand after he finished his successful interview. no one can ever know, he thought as he dressed himself in the uniform on his first day.

thus began issei’s super secret side hustle where he ate women out for cash.

sounds worse when you say it outright but it was just working. he was good at it, the women liked him, and he was making BANK. still, there were challenges. some women refused to bathe before coming and he would have to send them to the restroom to freshen up which absolutely ruined his chances for a good tip. some women would become heavily infatuated with him, believing that they were in some sort of forbidden romance. he learned to turn them down quick and easy to avoid conflict in the workplace which furthered his space as a boss favorite. but his hardest challenge by far was meeting you.

you were one of hanamaki’s friends, having met him at one of his brief stints in retail on his search for a job. he had gotten fired but you both stayed in touch after he left, becoming really close, really fast.

issei had met you first when takahiro had invited you to the biweekly seijoh third-years movie night. at first, he had been pissed as an “outsider” had never been invited before and he was worried you’d ruin the vibe, especially since it was the first time in months that oikawa would be able to join them. makki vouched for you through and through and the other boys were okay with it so you were in. the second he met you, all his fears of awkwardness and discomfort faded away.

you were great.

you were hilarious, pretty, and could keep up with makki’s harsh jokes, tooru’s diva attitude, iwa’s tendency to hit (hard), and issei’s original disdain. by the end of the night, he had completely forgotten why he didn’t want you there in the first place.

from then on, you were a staple in their little friend group. you were added to the groupchat where you balanced memes with spouts of deep wisdom and you were ever so reliable, always there if any of them needed it.

yeah, you were great. that’s where the problems started.

issei’s feelings for you quickly went from platonic to romantic, faster than you can say godzilla. he hadn’t even recognized that he was falling for you until it was way too late. normally, he wouldn’t have a problem confessing to you but because of his newly found ...occupation, he was too nervous. how would you take it that he was basically a glorified prostitute? ok, that wasn’t exactly what he did but still! you’d probably find him disgusting and horrible and leave the friend group forever. then he’d have to deal with oikawa’s senseless whining and makki’s subtle digs, blaming him for your departure. yeah, he wasn’t going to put himself through that so he decided to keep his mouth shut.

too bad he didn’t have any control over makki’s.

you and takahiro had been on a little friend-date at mcdonald’s after you’d had a long and frustrating shift. you just wanted to vent, expressing your general hate for your job and desperate need for stress relief.

that’s when makki opened his (big, stupid) mouth and suggested that you visit a little place called coffee and cunnilingus. you nearly choked on your fries at the title before quickly pressing him for details. thankfully, he had the decency not to expose that issei worked there but he had not done a good enough job convincing you not to go there. not that it would’ve mattered. your curiosity was peaked and your libido was high so why not try out the weird cafe where you let a complete stranger stick his tongue inside you?

it was settled. you were going to go and you were going to get eaten out and you were going to like it!

or at least that is what you repeated in your head as you walked to the address on your phone before taking a deep breath and walking inside.

“hello, welcome to coffee and cunnilingus, how might i pleasure you this afterno— yn?” issei’s eyes widened as they met your equally bewildered ones, the both of you staring at each other in shock.

“matsukawa-san, is everything alright?” a large hand rested on issei’s shoulder, startling him out of his thoughts and forcing him to break (horrified) eye contact with you and move it onto his boss who was now looking down on him menacingly.

“y-yes sir, everything is fine!” he squeaked out, hating the way his voice cracked on his first syllable. his boss looked at him suspiciously but thankfully didn’t press.

“well, since nothing is wrong, take this beautiful young woman to a booth where you will assist her!” the hand resting on issei’s shoulder slowly squeezed, making him wince in pain. the pain was only an afterthought though to the larger implication of his boss’ words. he’s going to assist you. assist as in pleasure. pleasure as in eat you out.

holy shit, you were going to pass out.

apparently, issei had the same thought process as you, his face whitening like a sheet. “m-me? but sir i-“

“do your job matsukawa-san!” his boss cut him off with a forced smile. all issei could do was nod and silently lead you off to a closed booth near the back or lose his job. you stayed close behind him but remained quiet, absolutely terrified of breaking the silence and ruining the bubble you had created.

you finally reached the booth in question. issei gently opened the curtain and motioned for you to get it, to which you obliged and he followed just behind.

the moment the curtain closed, you were enveloped in an awkward silence and tense atmosphere, neither of you speaking or looking at one another for fear of one of you running out. after what felt like hours, you opened your mouth to speak, not realizing issei had thought the same thing.

“so-“

“i-“

you finally made eye contact with him and burst into the laughter, the tension quickly broken. it took a full minute or two for the both of you to calm down, the absurdity of the entire situation finally catching up with you.

“you first,” issei said, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes while fixing you with an intense gaze swirled with an emotion you couldn’t quite place but it made butterflies bubble up in your stomach. you quickly turned your gaze to the comfortable seat beneath you, your fingers playing with the red stitching while you thought of what you had wanted to say.

“are you any good?” your hand flew up to cover your mouth as your cheeks filled with heat, the embarrassment of your words catching up to you. you hadn’t meant to say that but when you opened your mouth to apologize, you were stopped in your tracks by the lovely sound of issei’s full-bodied laughter filling the tiny booth.

you had heard it just moments earlier but without the sound of your own giggles drowning it out, you couldn’t help but think that he sounded beautiful. you basked in the sound as it slowly trailed off back into silence. now it was you doing the staring making issei look off with a red face and a heart threatening to pound out of his chest.

“y-yeah i’m pretty good. you want to try? me, i mean?” his words nearly leave you gasping, your brain working overtime to try and comprehend what he was saying to you.

“only if y-you want to? what do you want issei?” you whispered, suddenly unable to find your voice. you wanted this to be okay for him too; you didn’t want him to be uncomfortable even though you wanted him more than you could verbally express. despite the embarrassment and fear of rejection lingering under your skin, you stared at him, awaiting his answer. a tiny minuscule nod came from him and you internally shook your head. you needed to hear him.

“i need you to say it, issei.” your words, while quiet, were firm and issei felt himself hardening in his uniform slacks. he swallowed in his increasingly drying mouth before opening his mouth to respond.

“i want to eat your pussy. can i?”

shit.

your own voice was stolen by his words and all you could give him was a nod before he was on you.

issei didn’t waste any time falling to his knees, pulling your panties down, and hiking your skirt up to your stomach, revealing your glistening folds to his hungering eyes.

“fuck, you’re so wet,” is all the warning you get before he’s licking a long stripe up you from entrance to clit before he’s sucking the hard, sensitive nub into his mouth. your eyes immediately rolled back into your head, your hips instinctively bucking up into his mouth while a gasped moan of issei left your lips.

if he could bottle your moans and use them whenever he pleased, he would, the sound sending another pulse of arousal to his already hard cock. he was tempted to reach down and pull himself out of his trousers but he denied himself. this was about you; you and your wet ass pussy.

issei continued his ministrations on your clit, circling it with his tongue before pulling it into his mouth while his hand was ready to get busy. it crept up your thigh, sending shivers down your spine until it reached your sopping entrance, two of his fingers teasing the slit before delving in to the third knuckle.

the moan you let out is borderline animalistic as your body sends another wave of slick pulsing out over his hand. he groaned into your cunt at your tightness, his mind only imagining him deep within you while you squeeze him for all he’s got.

the amount of slick you produced made it easy for him to add a third finger, thrusting them in and out while also crooking them upwards in search for your special spot that would have you seeing stars. it took him a little prodding but he knew he found it when your back arched, your hand came down into his hair, and you whimpered out a string of curses.

“that’s it baby, cmon, you’re doing so well, wanna see you come apart for me,” he all but growled against your clit before delving back in with a higher intensity, his desperation for you to come winning out his desire to tease you and drag this out as long as possible.

with his incessant pressure on your g-spot and his lips suctioned around your clit, it wasn’t long before he got what he wanted.

“isseiisseiisseiissei, i’m coming, i’m coming-oh fuck!” you screamed as you clenched and gushed all over his fingers, your entire body caving in with the intensity of your orgasm. his fingers were practically forced from your spasming cunt but they quickly found a place rubbing your nub side to side as fast as possible. the overwhelming urge to pee came over you and you shook your head, trying to push his hand away.

“no, no, give it to me, i know you can,” issei groaned, his eyes locked on your dripping pussy. the pleasure he was giving came to a head at his words and you felt a clear liquid escape from your tired, overstimulated cunt, your mouth opening in a silent moan before collapsing back on the seat.

the sight proved to be too much for issei as he felt his body tense, his own orgasm washing over him as he emptied himself into his boxers. he fell back onto the ground, in shock of himself coming entirely untouched. he’d never done it before but of course it was you that would bring it out of him. a smile spread across his face at the thought, his head tilting back as he laughed, catching the attention of your worn body.

“what’re y’laughing at?” you slurred, cringing a little at how fucked out you sounded but issei didn’t seem to mind, his face glowing while covered in your slick and cum.

“nothing, nothing, but uh, i have a question.” you felt your heart leap to your chest, your mind already racing with the possibilities. he’s going to say this was a mistake, that we’re just better off as friends. oh god, what if he says i stunk? or the worst pussy he’s ever had? or what if—

“want to go and get a coffee?” he asked, the smile still plastered on his face but with an uncharacteristic hint of shyness. the butterflies were back in your stomach as you shyly nodded before allowing him to help clean you up and standing, not missing how he slipped your lacy underwear deep into one of his pockets.

issei’s hand found its way into yours as he said goodbye to his coworkers and boss before leading you out of the cafe, watching you tell an animated retelling of the bullshit that occurred at your job with a warm grin on his face and pink cheeks.

it might not be like matsukawa issei to be embarrassed but if it resulted in getting you by his side? he would do it again and again.

#and i did this for what???? #watch me complain about being nauseous tomorrow from staying up too late 😤🙈 #writing this: 😀😗✨ #reading it back: 😩💦🥴🙈 #ok lemme shut up #haikyuu!! #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu smut #hq smut #haikyuu x reader smut #hq x reader smut #matsukawa x y/n #matsukawa issei #hq matsukawa #haikyuu matsukawa #matsukawa smut #mattsun issei #issei smut #matsukawa x reader #matsukawa x you #matsukawa angst #matsukawa scenarios #matsukawa issei x you #hanamaki takahiro #hanamaki x reader #hanamaki smut #hanamaki fluff #SEIJOH SUPREMACY <3<3

[ashintheairlikesnow]

A Little Bit Stabbed

Jake Gets Stabbed Miniseries: First Second Third Fourth Fifth Sixth

CW: Discussion of past child abuse/domestic violence, description of stab wound, painkillers/drugged but in a good way, brief IV needle reference, some short references to Jake’s religious trauma, some trauma response stuff

“Took four of us to get you onto the couch, you know,” Kauri says, fingers moving gently to brush Jake’s short hair back off his forehead. There’s a hint of humor to his deep voice, but Jake catches the tremor in it, too. “You’re heavier than you look.”

“Must be… pretty fucking heavy, then,” Jake manages, voice slightly thin. They gave him something - Nat’s EMT friend showed up with IV supplies while refusing to tell anyone where they’d gotten ahold of everything from, except to repeatedly reassure all of them I know someone, it’s taken care of, I probably won’t go to jail for this. Besides, I’ve been in jail before.

Jake might not have found it very reassuring if he wasn’t halfway to unconscious from the pain alone at the time.

Now, though, there’s a needle feeding a steady supply of something wonderful into his bloodstream, holding the worst of the pain at bay. All he can feel now is maybe a little bit of an itch he knows better than to scratch, and a heaviness to his limbs that keeps them limp and relaxed. 

“We had to turn the stupid thing into the pull-out bed just to make sure your feet wouldn’t be higher than your head.” Kauri smiles at him, but there’s worry in those warm blue eyes, and Jake uses every ounce of strength to lift his good hand, the one on the uninjured side, and take Kauri’s, pulling his knuckles to his lips to brush against them. 

“I’m okay,” Jake says softly. “I am, Kaur. It’s not so bad.”

“It’s not-... you got fucking stabbed in your own kitchen, Jake.” Kauri’s lips thin and he looks away, over towards the TV, playing Clue.

Funny, Jake thinks, woozy and untethered to any kind of focus. My mom used to play Clue when we were alone, after. Made her feel better for a while.

“Just a… a flesh wound,” Jake manages in a terrible approximation of a British accent.

Kauri just looks at him, expression serious, and leans over until their foreheads touch. He’s warm, and Jake’s eyes close, basking in the body heat that comes off of him, surrounds them both. “Don’t,” Kauri whispers. “Please don’t make jokes. I thought-”

“It’s okay,” Jake murmurs. 

Eventually, he should probably tell someone he can only sort of feel the hand on the injured side. But not now. 

“It’s okay. It’s not s’bad. I got the good drugs, right?”

“Antibiotics and…” Kauri squints at the label on the bag attached to the IV, then winces and shakes his head. “Sorry. Can’t read today. It, uh. It kind of comes and goes when I’m worried, and today-”

“I get it. But… you don’t have to worry about me, Kaur. It’s over, it happened… I’ll feel better pretty fast. It’s okay.”

“It’s not,” Kauri says softly, but he relaxes beside Jake, keeping a hold of his hand. His fingers are slightly chilled, but they warm against Jake’s. The two of them settle into silence for a while, a woman in black on the TV with eyes blown wide in comic exaggeration of anger speaking in a blur of sound Jake knows by heart but can’t really pick apart from anything else, not just yet, not right now. 

He knows this movie by heart. He and his mom used to curl up under a blanket while she closed her eyes and prayed for things to get better and Jake prayed for his dad to die in a car accident or some other terrible way, and make it slow, and then pray with terror not to go to hell for thinking like that.

If men like his father go to heaven, Jake would rather burn in hell.

At least my favorite bands would be there, he thinks, and laughs to himself, shoulders shaking a little, sending a ripple of pain down his arm and spiking into his skull. He winces, but the thought still strikes him as too funny to quit circling woozily around his mind, and he keeps laughing a little.

Kauri turns to look at him, eyebrows raised. “What are you laughing at?”

Jake blinks over at him, those wide blue eyes. It had been hell not to be able to hold him for so long, with eyes like that. Real hell, the kind where you spend your days wishing for a connection that seems too hard to make. “Nothing, just… thinking about shit with my dad,” He says, finally. “My mom and I used to watch Clue all the time. It’s her favorite movie.”

“Yeah?” Kauri looks over his shoulder, back at the television, and Jake’s eyes move lazily over the slight bump in his nose where it was broken by someone years ago, the dip of his lips, the roundness of his chin, angling a little with age. The way his neck would feel to trace with just one fingertip, how he smiles when Jake does it, asks him what the fuck he’s looking at when there’s way more to Kauri that needs attention right now than just his face.

There’s a lazy wave of warmth in Jake, a steady thrum of something that goes much deeper than arousal, at the memory.

Adoration.

“Yeah,” He says, softly. “She’d put it on when he left the house, we’d make popcorn and watch it. Saturday night special, popcorn and a movie, Mom and Jake.”

“Where’d your dad go?” Kauri asks, then the answer catches up with him, and he winces. “Wait, sorry. I think I know where he went.”

“Church.”

That is clearly not what Kauri expected to hear. “I-... what?” He turns back to Jake, eyebrows furrowing. “I thought-”

“Nope. He went to church. Fish fry on Saturdays, he volunteered.” Jake is dimly aware that this might be more than he’s ever told Kauri about his father, at least more than he’s ever said that wasn’t laser-focused on the hurts, the bruises, the concussion, the ER visits where Jake learned to lie. “He was a magician with a deep fryer. Best fucking fish I ever ate.” He laughs, then coughs a little against the new round of ache in his shoulder. 

Kauri is quiet for a moment, his eyes searching Jake’s face, maybe looking for an idea of how to respond the right way. Jake knows that look - he’s seen it less and less over the years, but it never fully stops.

Kauri never stops looking for the safe answer, the one that won’t get him hurt. Jake never stops being ready to fight his way out if it happens again. Kauri is still ready to say what the abuser needs to hear, placate and please and keep himself alive.

Jake is still ready to pick up a weapon and use it if his father ever comes near he or his mother again. Not that he ever will. Not that he even wants to, sixteen years after Jake last saw his face. 

But he’s still built, deep within, to fight the threat. And so is Kauri, in his own way. 

“I love you so much,” Jake says softly. “I hope you didn’t pull anything dragging my ass around.”

“Mmmn, guess I’ll find out,” Kauri says softly, snuggling back up to him, then. “Should we change the movie? If it’s, like, a thing for you-”

“Nah.” Jake smiles, slightly. He feels pleasantly drunk, on whatever the painkiller slowly drip-feeding into his arm is. A little woozy, a little bit in love with it. “It’s like a comfort thing, really. I should call my mom-”

“I already did,” Kauri says, gently pushing him back down as Jake tries to make himself sit up. “She’s driving up. She said she’ll get here in the morning, she had to find someone to watch her dog.”

Jake blinks twice. “Mom has a dog?”

“I think it’s new. But, um. You can’t exactly meet her at her hotel, Jake. She’s gonna have to come here.”

Jake feels a rush of old nerves prickling along his arms, the hair of his neck trying to stand up. He closes his eyes, tries to push it back down. “I’ve never given her my address. It’s not safe for us. What if-... I don’t know. I’ve just never… I’ve always worried that if he found her, you know, that he’d… convince her to tell him where I live. He’d turn us all in just to feel like the big righteous moral hero all over again. Probably hard to feel that way when you’re hitting a teenager. Easier when you’re turning in vigilantes with stolen property.” He spits the words, and Kauri flinches a little. “Shit. Sorry, Kaur.”

“No, it’s. It’s okay. I get what you mean. But I don’t think your mom would do that. She loves you.”

“She does.” Jake exhales, closes his eyes. Inside him there is still an angry child that wants to point out that it hasn’t always been enough. But there’s a grown man, and a decade of fucking therapy, telling him there’s a whole lot more to it than that. “And she’s finally come around to understanding why I do this. Yeah… yeah, we’ll tell her where I am. It’ll be fine. Honestly, it’s not so bad. Jameson really did a great job on the stabbing.” Jake tries to laugh again. “Fucking surgeon with a butcher knife. He managed to miss every fucking bit of me that would have killed me.”

“Except for if you bled out,” Kauri points out, voice small. 

“Yeah… but I didn’t.” Jake thinks of Antoni’s face, the focus in his dark eyes, the quick movement of his hands, the blinding agony of the cloth being forced into the wound to soak up the blood, the way Antoni had leaned all his weight forwards to put enough pressure to staunch the bleeding. Jake had never felt pain like that before, and he’s not sure he could handle feeling it again. “Ant was there. It’ll be okay. Where is he?”

“In his room.” Picking at the heavy thick blanket laid over Jake, not quite looking at him now, Kauri asks, “How are you so calm about this?”

“Drugs,” Jake answers right away. “Like ninety percent drugs.” He groans as a throbbing ache travels from the stab wound, up into his skull, all the way down to his toes. “Fuck. The… whatever’s in there helps. But also…” Jake sighs, letting his eyes drift to the ceiling, over the popcorn-texture there. He’d meant to scrape it clean and smooth, when he bought the house, but other stuff kept taking priority, and he hadn’t gotten around to it yet. “This isn’t th’ first time, you know?”

Kauri frowns. “Jake, I have licked just about everything on your body, I’ve never seen a scar from-”

“Not… not stabbed. But… stuck here, on a couch-bed, tryin’... tryin’ to heal from shit. That’s not new.” Jake exhales. Above him, the blades of the ceiling fan circle lazily, and his eyes follow the movement of the shadows. 

“No, I guess not.”

“In any case… I haven’t s-seen… Jameson’s upstairs, right? Can you get him down here?”

Something passes over Kauri’s face, a shadow, a discomfort and darkness that Jake can’t quite read. “Jameson’s not in the house, Jake.”

“What? Why?” Jake starts trying to sit up again, and this time Kauri’s gentle push isn’t enough to get him back down. He grinds his teeth against the pain and forces himself upright, trying to shift his legs over the side of the bed. The room spins around him, dizzy-sick flip in his stomach, but he ignores it. He’s felt worse than this and kept moving before. “Shit, fuck, I should’ve made sure he didn’t leave-”

“He didn’t. I made him go.”

The look Jake turns on Kauri is baffled, but there’s anger, too, welling up inside him. “You what?”

“I told him he can’t stay here if he’s a danger to you and the others,” Kauri says, but he cringes back from Jake’s expression, instinctive fear. Jake hates how he looks like his dad - huge and muscular, a threat inherent in his existence that he might not give off if he were smaller. But his bulk and his strength is also the thing that makes him capable of withstanding the danger he puts himself in for them. It’s the reason he could come home and pick Chris up with a broken rib and carry him after they raided the last safehouse he’d lived in. It’s the reason he could finally fight back with his dad. It’s the reason the kids at his new schools, one after another after another as he and his mom moved constantly to try not to be found, left him alone. 

“Kauri, he can’t-... Jameson’s not. He can’t live on his own.”

“That’s a lie,” Kauri says, lips barely moving. “That’s a lie they tell us-”

“No, that’s not what I-... Jameson’s like Chris,” Jake says, softly. “Like Chris used to be. He was treated like an animal, Kauri. He didn’t get to use fucking utensils to eat in the last two places he was held, he told me himself. He can’t live on his own yet. If you kicked him out… Jesus Christ, Kauri, do you not remember how it felt when you were kicked out?”

Kauri looks like he’s been slapped. “Wait, Jake-... I didn’t mean-”

“We found you half-dead under a goddamn bush, Kauri, you can’t do that to someone else just because I got a little bit stabbed! Shit. Fuck. I gave him a burner phone, if he’s still got it on him, maybe I can call-”

“Jakob fucking Stanton!” Kauri yells so rarely, and Jake goes still, turning to look at him, seeing the anger written across Kauri’s face. Kauri angry is electric, and immensely sexy, and something Jake had gone so long thinking he would never see unless Vincent Shield showed up with a new idea for how to make up for all his failures by forcing himself around someone who hated him. “Will you fucking listen to me?!”

Jake just sits there, staring at him. He can’t even find the words. Eventually, he just nods.

“I didn’t kick him out on the street, I’m not that awful, and fuck you for thinking I am and we’re going to talk about that later when you aren’t half off your head from painkillers. I don’t want him here until you’re feeling better in case it happens again, so I-... so I sent him home with Nat. She doesn’t have anyone living with her right now, and she said okay, so he’s going to stay with her.” Kauri swallows, reaching slowly out to lay his hand on Jake’s leg. “He and I talked. He said it’s always been men, Jake. All of the ones who hurt him were men, one of them was... was really big like you, I guess. So I thought-... if he’s with Nat, maybe it won’t happen again for long enough for him to, to work it through in therapy and Dr. Berger maybe can give him, give him s-something to help. So maybe he won’t, um, hallucinate or… or w-whatever the next time.” Kauri’s eyes well up, glimmer with tears that don’t fall. “I was trying to help. I thought he’d feel safer with only a woman, maybe, and I sent him alone so that he’d know he can’t hurt Allyn, he was really scared of that, and…”

Jake’s mouth hangs open.

Kauri slumps over, his forehead slowly resting against Jake’s back where he sits slightly behind him now that Jake is nearly off the bed. “I had to make sure everyone’s safe. I didn’t know what else to do. I sent Chris to stay with Laken overnight but he’ll be back tomorrow, Antoni’s fucked up but he’s in his room and he’s safe, and all the rescues promised to stay in their rooms and Allyn tried to go with Jameson and I think they hate me now because I said no, but I didn’t-... I tried to think of what you would do, if it had been Chris or me he’d hurt. I was trying to be like you. I’m s-sorry if I fucked it up, I’m sorry, please, I thought you were going to die, please don’t be mad at me-”

“Kauri.” Jake turns, and uses his good hand to lift Kauri’s chin, meeting his eyes. 

Blue on blue, always. 

“I’m not mad,” He says, gently. “Not… not now. You’re right, I shouldn’t have… just been a shit deciding what you did without asking. I’m sorry. So, let me just… you spent the last couple of hours really fucking busy, huh?”

Kauri nods, kissing Jake’s fingertips, one by one. “I’m sorry,” He whispers. “I’m not… I’m not good at this, I’m not... not... I was so scared. I didn’t know what you would do, Jake, and Nat said she thought it was a good idea, so-”

“It is. It is a good idea.” Kauri blinks, surprised, and the tears that have been threatening finally run, clear as crystal, down his flushed cheeks. He looks like a fucking sculpture, Jake thinks to himself, like some artist’s idea of the perfect beautiful person. “Kauri, just. Now that I get what you were trying to do… Shit. That’s really smart.”

Kauri huffs a laugh, a kind of half-sobbing sound, and shakes his head. “It’s just, I was just guessing-”

“That’s all we ever do, too,” Jake says, voice soft. “We guess, at what we can do to help. Nat always says we make the hard choices when nobody else can. Kauri, that’s the smartest fucking idea. I’m… that’s some grace under fire shit. That’s amazing.”

“It… it is?”

“Yeah.” Jake kisses him, and Kauri tastes like mouthwash, like mint, kisses back with desperate intensity. “Yeah, Kaur. That’s even better than what I would have done. You’re so fucking smart. What made you decide to slum it with me?”

“You have a really good d-dick and I don’t w-w-want to lose access,” Kauri says, and he’s crying or laughing or maybe both. “You’re my eye candy.”

“You’re my Einstein.”

“Fuck you.”

“Fuck me yourself,” Jake says softly. 

“Heal a little first.” Kauri sighs, half-smiling, pulling Jake back into the bed to lay down again. “Everyone’s safe, Jake. At least for now. Everyone’s okay. You need to rest, and everyone’s going to be okay.”

Jake lets his head be maneuvered back onto the pillow, feels Kauri settle back down next to him, pulling the blankets back up over them both. He’s silent for a while, lets the soft sound of the end of the movie wash over him, showing the different endings.

“I love you,” He whispers. The way the adrenaline is fading makes him sleepy, drifting in a new drowsy haze, ready to dose off again. “So much.”

“Love you, too,” Kauri murmurs. 

He knows this - the couch-bed pulled out, watching movies and stand-up comedy at a low volume, a throb of pain somewhere that will heal only with time - by heart.

With Kauri’s weight and warmth beside him, it feels entirely, completely new.

-

@astrobly @burtlederp @finder-of-rings @whump-tr0pes @raigash @moose-teeth @orchidscript @doveotions @pretty-face-breaker @eatyourdamnpears @boxboysandotherwhump @whumptywhumpdump @whumpfigure @outofangband @downriver914 @justabitofwhump @thehopelessopus @butwhatifyouwrite @yet-another-heathen @nonsensical-whump @newandfiguringitout @gonna-feel-that-tomorrow @oops-its-whump @cubeswhump @whumpiary @endless-whump

#whump #past child abuse tw #past domestic violence tw #erase to control #jake the shelter guy #caretaker and whumpee #whumpee turned caretaker #caretaker as whumpee #injured caretaker #hurt/comfort #mostly comfort but some hurt #h/c #angsty fluff #stab wound #injury aftermath #box boy universe #bbu #box boy #religious trauma tw #it's vague but still #angry whumpee #angry caretaker #both of them are both! #drugged whumpee #sort of #ptsd tw

[parkersharthook]

We’ve Only Just Begun

Peter Parker x reader

Warnings: bad words, crack fluff

2.5k+ words

Reference TikToks: kiss my best friend challenge & rich best friend check

series masterlist

~.~

“Peter I’m bored.”

“Hi bored, I’m Peter.” Peter looked to you with a small smirk

“I know, I did just address you. Also, never say that joke to me every again if you wanna keep dating.”

“ooh, harsh crowd.” Peter laughed.

“babyyyy I’m bored. It’s summer vacation, I should not be this bored.”

“y/n, you’re distracting my intern.” Your dad snipped quickly, elbows deep into some kind of machinery. You weren’t really sure what they were working, having gotten very uninterested once they started. “He’s helping me right now; do you want me to lose an arm?”

You rolled your eyes and spun around in the chair, “dad you always take him.”

“hey, you get him every day during the school year. Summer is my time.”

Peter looked between the father and daughter with a brow raised, “are you two seriously fighting over me right now?”

“well I wouldn’t have to fight over my boyfriend with my dad if Harley was here right now. That selfish idiot left and now you’re the only wonder boy to entertain my dad.”

Tony scoffed and held out his hand, wordlessly asking Peter for some tool. Peter handed it over immediately before turning his head back, “where did Harley go?”

“I don’t know, he just said he was leaving and walked out.”

“maybe he’s got a hot date.”

You huffed and slouched in the seat, narrowing your eyes at Peter. “makes one of us.”

Tony laughed and twisted slightly to give you a wink, “sorry honey but that was the deal. I let your boyfriend stay here if he helps me out.”

You rolled your eyes so hard Peter was concerned you’d see your brain, “oh puh-lease, you wanted Peter here just as much as I did. Either for Spidey stuff or normal nerd stuff, you’re just using this as an excuse.”

“fine but at least I’m not complaining about him sneaking into your room every night.” Peter sputtered, his face going instantly red and almost dropping whatever mechanic was in his hand.

“oh Mr. stark, i- we don’t- it’s not-“

“relax kid, if I was going to crucify you I’d have already done it.” Tony spun to face you, “now can you please go bother someone else. If you really want to spend time with Peter you’ll let us finish this.”

You huffed and left the lab as Peter blew you a quick kiss causing you flip him off jokingly. This is not what you wanted when you wished for your boyfriend to get along with your dad.

--

It had been a few hours and you were still bored. You had promptly gone to your room after leaving the lab and gone on tiktok, you’re absolute favorite way to waste time but now you were bored again. And you missed Peter, especially after a stupid trend kept popping up on your fyp of people kissing their “best friends” making you realize you weren’t kissing your very kissable boyfriend right now.

As if he could read your thoughts, Peter waltzed into your bedroom and immediately shucked his shirt off to wipe his face and hands.

“well hello to you too stud.” You said, biting your lip and very obviously ogling his toned body.

Peter laughed as he threw his oil stained shirt into the hamper and went to grab another from the dresser. You pouted, “why are you putting a new one on? You look fine without it.”

“because it’s the middle of the day and anyone could come looking for us and I am not about to be killed by any of the avengers because I’m corrupting their ‘little princess’”. Peter said as he put the new shirt on and flopped next to you, his chin now resting on his hand as he looked up at you.

“ugh they need to get over themselves and realize that we’re adults who’ve been dating for three years and basically already live together.”

Peter shrugged, his empty hand rubbing against your bare leg casually. “you’re always going to be the little girl they watched grow up.” He laughed at your pout and squeezed your thigh, “what have you been up to? Cured your boredom?”

“No.” you huffed, “just been scrolling on tiktok. Kinda want to start making them, could be fun.”

“what would you make?”

You shrugged, immediately struck with a great idea. “I don’t know whatever the trends on. I’m gonna put the tv on, don’t move.”

You shimmied out of bed, setting your phone up as discreetly as possible and turning on your tv. You started the video and moved back to the bed. You knew the trend was to kiss a best friend but you thought it would still be fun with Peter, plus you are best friends… you’re just also already dating. So not cheating, just a loophole.

Peter was still on his stomach, hand supporting his face, as he scrolled aimlessly through Instagram. And with you sitting against your headboard, it looked friendly enough. You waited for the right time before sliding down so you were laying next to him, practically under him. He looked up at you and smiled and for a second you were worried that he was gonna go ahead and kiss you but luckily he waited just long enough where you could initiate it in time with the song. You surged forward, hand immediately coming to weave into his curls to pull him closer.

Peter was obviously not expecting you to kiss him so aggressively so he fell slightly before catching himself on one arm that was now positioned next to your head, the other going to hold your hip. Now you really were under him.

You got lost in kissing him for a few moments when you realized the video was probably done and detached your lips. You giggled as Peter chased your lips, eyes still mostly closed. You slid out from beneath him and walked over to your phone.

“wha- where are you going?” Peter pouted, running his hands through his messy curls. You bit your thumb nail slightly as you rewatched the video, it was cute. “did you take a video of that?”

You nodded and showed him, watching a goofy smile stretch onto his face as he looked up at you, “so when you said you were gonna start filming TikToks you meant immediately.”

You shrugged and sat next to him, “no but the opportunity presented itself.”

You quickly captioned the video ‘sooo I kissed my bsf’ and tagged Peter’s account before posting it and throwing your phone to the side.

Peter kissed your bare shoulder, “is this gonna become a regular thing?”

You giggled and shrugged, “I don’t know. Guess you’ll have to wait and see.” Peter groaned, grabbing you around the middle and falling back onto the bed, pulling you down with him.

--

It was a few days later when you opened tiktok again, surprised to see your video had racked up 600 thousand likes and over 5 million views. You were surprised to see that it had gone semi-viral and yet no one recognized you. Not that you had your legal name in your username and you definitely weren’t as famous as your dad and family, but you weren’t hidden away either. Honestly though, this was kinda nice to just be another twenty-one year old on tiktok, posting stupid videos for fun.

You went to the comments immediately to see what people were saying and laughed at some of the funnier ones. You noticed that even MJ had commented.

Usera: aw so cute *blocked*

Userb: ms girl… he’s been waiting for this

Userc: no way best friends kiss like that

everythingbagel: “bsf” yeah fucking right y/n

⇲ begginstrips: hehe love you mj

You went back to your fyp and scrolled through a bit before you ran into stassie baby’s video of her showing off Kylie’s car collection with the audio saying, ‘rich best friend check’. You quickly sent the video to Peter, who was currently at lunch with Harry and Ned.

y/n: wanna do this when you get back?

Peter: lol sure seems funny

it was a few more hours before Peter got back to the compound, him easily finding you curled into the couch watching How To Train Your Dragons. You smiled as he dropped a kiss to your forehead, “this movie again?”

“it’s one of the best movies ever made,” you sassed back, “so yes, this movie again.”

He leaned down over the back of the couch smiling into your face before giving you another quick succession of kisses. “wanna film that tiktok?”

You checked the time before nodded, languidly stretching your body and standing up. “where should we start it?”

And that’s how Wanda found you and Peter at 3 am, videoing rando fancy stuff around the compound, you strutting and swaying your hips dramatically. Wanda followed Peter around, who was filming, laughing at your antics and giving you tips on what to include. The three of you got so loud, that Tony eventually woke up to investigate what the three of you were up to… as it was usually not great.

“are you sure we can film this? I don’t reveal any state secrets.” Peter whispered not so well.

“what state secrets are we revealing?” you whirled around to see your father, one brow raised and a hip cocked to the side.

“good entrance, very dramatic dad.” You said with a laugh, “and there aren’t any state secrets being revealed.”

“what are you filming?”

“A tiktok.”

Tony rolled his eyes, “I’m not even gonna pretend to know what that is. Anyways go to bed, you guys are being loud.”

“yeah, yeah. We’re just finishing up.” You watched your dad walked away before turning back to Peter and Wanda, “let’s go film in front of one of his suits.”

--

Peter had posted the photo to his account and captioned it: “@begginstrips is my sugar momma ;)” before promptly throwing his phone to the floor and passing out next to you in bed.

It was 10 in the morning – which was far too early as you and Peter had only fallen asleep at 4 am – when MJ started calling you and didn’t stop until you literally rolled out of bed onto the floor to pick up.

“what the fuck m? it is too fucking early.”

“you’re all over the news.”

You paled, “what?” Everything you ever did wrong very quickly flashed through your eyes, your mind scrambling to remember what was caught on camera.

“yeah your tiktok went viral. People are freaking out.” You sagged in relief.

“Jesus mj you can’t just say that shit for it to be tiktok.” A pause, “wait which tiktok?”

“the one Peter posted of his ‘rich best friend’ and you walking around the compound.”

You let out a quick laugh, “oh ok. That’s not that bad.”

“also can we talk about this whole best friend schtick you and Peter have going on tiktok? What the fuck?”

You chuckled slightly before crawling back into bed, your heart now beating at a normal pace. “the first one was just a trend so I lied to follow it and then it was just the sound. Also he is my best friend, he’s just also my boyfriend.”

MJ scoffed, “rude. I’m your best friend.”

“right, right. Sorry.” Peter grumbled slightly as he buried his head into your hip. You gently carded your fingers through his curls, “do you know why it’s all over the news?”

“apparently people didn’t know you existed? I don’t know, just thought that you might want a warning in case your dad got angry.”

“well I appreciate it, regardless of the fact that you basically gave me a heart attack and woke me up at butt fuck.”

“it’s 10 am, get over yourself and have a cup of coffee. Anyways, lunch tomorrow?”

You yawned, “sure sounds good. Wanna invite betty?”

“she’s still in Hawaii with her family, they’re coming back this weekend.”

“right, ok. Let me know what time you wanna go.”

“will do. Love you bitch.”

You smiled into the phone and yawned again, “love you bitch.” You hung up and tossed your phone to the floor, rubbing your eyes harshly.

Peter barely opened his eyes as he looked up at you, “what was that about?”

“apparently we’re famous.” You replied as you reached over his body to grab his phone.

Peter snuggled deeper into your body, wrapping his arms around your leg and laying his head in your lap. You rested against the headboard, one hand still playing with his curls and one now scrolling to Peter’s tiktok.

You blanched as you saw the video had gotten over 6 million likes and 45 million views overnight. And according to the comments, people were very confused.

User1: ummm is that the avengers compound or am I tripping?

User2: so we’re all just finding out tony stark has a child rn?

User3: mmmm something don’t add up here?

You sighed as turned the phone off, rubbing your eyes again. A headache was quickly setting in. You leaned down to press a chaste kiss to Peter’s cheek before slowly working your way out of his grasp.

He whined, “baby where are you going? It’s early.”

“I have to go talk to my dad about this but you keep sleeping babe.”

He rolled over to face you as you walked towards your closet. “are you sure? I can come with you.”

“no, it’s ok baby. I really don’t think it’ll be a big deal.”

--

It was slightly a bigger deal than you realized. Pepper was now talking you through ‘making sure SI had a good image on social media’ while your dad smirked in a corner.

Pepper stroked your arm, “this isn’t bad press or anything. You’ll just have to be careful going into the future. And you know that with being a Stark, you’re gonna have a lot of eyes on you and probably a lot of criticism.” She sighed, “we’ve done a good job shielding you from the press for this long but it might be a lot.”

You smiled at her softly. Pepper really had always been like a mom to you and now that her and your dad were officially married, it was even more true. “Yeah I know. I’m honestly not too worried.” You turned to your dad, “did you know people didn’t know I existed?”

Tony shrugged, “Doesn’t surprise me. I have almost every record of you sealed from the public for your safety and you never were one for the spotlight.” He walked over and dropped a kiss onto your forehead, “never show my suits on your clock app again.”

You rolled your eyes and stuck your tongue out at him, “for someone who owns a company based on new and cutting edge technology, you sure are out of touch.”

He gasped, a hand pressed to his heart. “how dare you, my own daughter.”

Pepper laughed softly, “she’s not wrong. Anyways, post whatever you want to your personal account. You’re an adult, so we trust you just be careful. I don’t want to see you getting hurt.”

You kissed her cheek before standing and stretching out your back. “don’t worry, I already have a plan for my next video.”

“god help us.” Tony muttered.

#marvel #spiderman #peter parker #stark!reader #peter parker x stark!reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker imagine #marvel fanfiction #marvel imagine #emma writes #pp tiktok series

[coltsbitch]

hold it ~ eren yeager x reader

eren yeager x reader; 2k; nsfw; watersports summary: only good girls get bathroom privileges

masterlist

You stumble in through the door.

“Not sure why you’re falling all over yourself even after you took off those shoes.” Eren tosses his keys on the table before walking into the kitchen.

You throw the shoes in question onto the floor before collapsing on the couch, “Tonight was so fun. We should do it again.” Your face is pressed into the cushions, unsure if Eren heard you.

But you do hear Eren picking up his keys from the table, followed by the clinking of a glass hitting the coffee table.

“Drink.”

You lift your head and pout, “I’m not thirsty.”

He rolls his eyes, “You’ll regret it in the morning.” Before heading down the hallway.

You sit up and pick up the glass, taking a sip, “When can we hang out with your friends again?”

Eren reappears, changed into a pair of sweats, a shirt in hand, “You like them that much?”

“They were funny.” You take another sip.

Eren sits down beside you, “Yeah, you really seemed to be enjoying Jean’s jokes tonight.”

You pout, hearing the jealousy laced in his tone, “But I still think your jokes are the funniest.”

Eren give you an unimpressed look, “Finish the water and pick a movie to put on.”

You smile downing the rest of the glass, knowing you’ll get cuddles if you do. You’re slightly surprised at Eren’s attitude, expecting him to say more about your behavior tonight. He clearly has some dumb competitive streak with Jean if the glares he had been sending tonight had anything to say about it.

He tosses the shirt at you and picks up the empty glass returning to the kitchen.

“Snacks too!” You call out pulling the shirt over and shimming out of your dress.

You’re about fifteen minutes into the movie, cuddled under a blanket with Eren behind you, when you realize how badly you need to pee.

The alcohol and two cups of water Eren forced you to drink aren’t doing any favors for your bladder.

“Don’t pause it.” You slide out of the blanket, “I’ll be quick.”

Eren hums in response, letting you go without ever taking his eyes of the television.

You hurry to Eren’s room where the single bathroom is connected. You go to open the door, but you find it locked.

“Babe!” You call out, trying to jiggle the doorknob, “I think the door’s locked!”

Pushing slightly, you realize the door is definitely locked. “Eren!”

You hurry back into the living room, seeing Eren hasn’t moved since you left him.

“Eren, did you hear me? Your bathroom door is locked.”

His attention doesn’t leave the television, “I heard you.”

“Well come help me, I really need to pee.” You whine.

Eren finally takes his eyes off the movie to meet yours, “Maybe you should have thought about that before acting like such a slut tonight.”

You feel your face heat up, “Eren, this isn’t funny.” You all but stomp your foot, “I really need to use the bathroom.”

“Only good girls get to use the bathroom.” He lifts the blanket, “Now be a good girl and come back and watch the movie. And maybe after it’s over you’ll get to use the bathroom.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell did I even do?”

Eren just raises an eyebrow, as if telling you not to play dumb at moment like this. But he doesn’t say anything, just stares while still gesturing to the space in front of him. Buy you can tell there’s a hesitant questioning in his eyes, letting you know to tell him if he’s going too far.

You purse your lips before stomping over, throwing yourself on the couch. Eren wraps an arm around your torso pulling you closer. You grimace when his arm presses into your bladder, but you keep your mouth shut as he nuzzles into your neck.

It helps to cross your legs tightly, the pressure somewhat pushing away the urge.

There’s no way you’re going to be able to concentrate. You hadn’t even really wanted to put on a movie in the first place, content to go to bed but Eren had insisted.

And now that you think of it, he had also been pretty pushy about finishing the two glasses of water. At first thinking it was his concern for an impending hangover, now you realize that sick fuck was probably planning this all along.

You huff trying to get comfortable, rolling over to your stomach. But Eren hauls you back against his bare chest.

The movement jostles you enough that makes it almost impossible to ignore the sensation. Causing you to cross your legs even tighter than before.

But the added pressure shoots straight to your clit, causing you to groan, in both frustration and pleasure.

Eren shushes you, running his thumb in comforting circles along your hip, as if he isn’t the reason you’re in this situation in the first place.

You’re able to hold out another twenty minutes, staying completely still with eyes closed, focusing on your breathing. Eren would think you were asleep if it wasn’t for the pinched look on your face.

He’s honestly a little impressed that you’ve kept quiet this long, unsure how you would react to all of this. But he’s pleased to see how well you’re doing, how you’re always a good girl for him.

He’s about to return his attention to the movie, not that he’s actually watching, his body thrumming impatiently with anticipation of what’s about to come, but then you let out a little whimper that sounds like his name.

“What’s that baby girl?”

“I can’t hold it anymore.” You turn in his arms so you can properly look at him. The tears in your lashes make his pants suddenly tighter than they were before. But he’s used to your tricks by now.

“I think you can.” Eren presses a kiss to your nose, “Be a good girl for me.”

A flash of anger comes over you, and you rip yourself from his grasp, sitting up on the couch, “I’m going to fucking piss myself if you don’t unlock that damn door.”

Eren resituates himself lazily, “Then do it.”

Your mouth drops at his nonchalant attitude. You’re annoyed that he’s winning this game, and you’d usually be more than fine to keep playing into it, but you really need to pee and at this point you’re not sure how much more you can last.

“Fine! You win!” You cry, “I’m sorry for what ever I did to make you mad.”

Eren tuts, “You don’t even know why you’re getting punished?”

You cross your arms and look away. You know he’s referring to the way you were indulging Jean tonight, laughing at his jokes, swatting at his shoulder with your fake laughs. All the while with an eye on Eren, seeing the fire building behind his eyes.

You thought it might result is some hot bathroom sex, but instead Eren kept his composure throughout the rest of the night, all the way home and up until now you thought he was just dismissing it.

“Because of my behavior.” You mutter out.

“And?” Eren presses.

“And because I was acting like a little whore tonight! Because I was doing it on purpose to make you mad so you would fuck me dumb, there are you happy?” You say in one breath, truly at your wits end. You don’t even care any more about this stupid game.

Eren watches you for a moment before opening his arms, you collapse into them as they come around you and fingers run up and down your back. It momentarily distracts from the pain that’s building in the lower half of your body.

“Can I please use the bathroom now?”

Eren lifts your chin with his thumb and finger, he has a small smile on his face and you mirror it, pleased with how happy he is with you.

“No.”

Your stomach drops you feel your jaw hanging open, “But I just, you said,”

“I didn’t say anything.” Eren cuts you off, “All you did is tell me why you’re a bad girl. I didn’t say that your punishment would end, did I?”

“Eren.” You whimper helplessly, “It hurts so much though.”

He hums, fingers running through your hair now, “I know it does sweetheart.”

You screw your eyes shut, tears coming out in full now, babbling about how sorry you are and how you’ll never do it again. Squirming in Eren’s lap because you still need to piss and with no end in sight to this torture, you’re unsure if you can hold it back.

“I can’t.” You shake your head back and forth against his chest, “I can’t hold it anymore.”

Eren places a gentle kiss to the top of you head, “You can, you’re doing so good for me.” The soft affection and cruel actions of his are making your head spin.

His hands slide their way down to your ass, wrapping around each thigh to pull them apart, your only solace being ripped away from you and leaving you exposed as Eren grinds his hard dick against your panty covered cunt.

You gasp and shoot up in his lap, Eren following after you. You’re trying to pull away but Eren wraps his hands around your back sliding you further into his lap.

Your eyes are wide, hips moving on their own, bodily reactions at war within yourself. You’re trying really hard to hold in the urge to release all over Eren, but he’s also moving your panties to the side, fingers playing at your clit that has you meeting his movements.

“Eren.” You warn, “I don’t think, I can’t, I’m going piss myself.”

Eren is gazing at you with such intensity, his eyes completely back, “Yeah?” He asks, “You gonna piss all over me?”

You nod your head, feeling wetter than you ever have before. Unsure if it’s your cum or piss that’s slicking up the sides of legs, dampening Eren and the couch underneath you.

Eren doesn’t slow his ministrations as he pulls down his pants, thick hard cock springing between the two of you.

You don’t even realize he’s lifting you and impaling you on his cock until you feel the sudden intrusion in yourself. All the sensations are confusing you, his fingers bringing you to the edge of pleasure but cock pressing you over the tipping your bladder can control. Your breath comes out in hiccupping pants and cries because you don’t know what to do.

Suddenly you feel your face gripped and forced to meet Eren’s stare, “You’re okay.” He says, “Let go.”

You feel yourself go rigid, and you can’t look away from Eren. His words wash over you with warmth and you know it’s going to be okay as you let yourself float away from all the pressure of trying to hold back. Your hips stutter against his, a liquid heat flowing out of you. And it’s going and going, unsure if this feeling is ever going to stop. But Eren has a sort of a smile on his face, lips moving with words you can’t hear.

You know Eren’s still thrusting into you, seeing as he’s bouncing in your vision, even if you can’t feel it with your body. Eventually his movements slow to a halt, the fingers digging into your waist feeling a little sharper. He kisses you deeply, tongue sliding aganist yours before pulling back to press small kisses on your face and along your neck.

You smile, letting your eys close, laying your face against Eren’s chest. His whispers and thump of his heart lulling you asleep.

It’s not until you feel a hot sensation envelope your entire body do you open your eyes. Except now you’re in the bathtub, Eren behind you while his hand is running a soapy cloth up your waist.

You hum in content, leaning your head back into the crook of his neck. Eren places a kiss on the side of your head, noticing you’re awake.

He hears you mumble something, “What was that?” Leaning his ear closer to your mouth.

“See you got the door open.” You mutter, a slight annoyance to your tone.

Eren chuckles, the vibrations deep in his chest rumbling against your back, “Yeah, I guess I did.”

#eren yaegar #eren yaeger x reader #eren jaeger #eren jeager x reader #eren x reader #aot x read #aot #snk #snk x reader

[kingexpl0sionmurder]

What Happens When You Dream? - Bakugou Katsuki - Smut

Author: @kingexpl0sionmurder​ Rating: NSFW 18+ Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki/F!Reader (Implied Kaminari Denki/Shinsou Hitoshi), Aged up (College), Quirkless AU. Words: 8,624 Warnings: swearing, oral (male receiving), ghosts, hauntings, brief mention of violence, horror movie references, witchy things, Bakugou bad mouths the occult and witches but I do not share his views on the matter. This is probably unnecessary but it should go without saying that seances are no joke and you shouldn’t preform one unless you know what you’re doing (which I certainly do NOT). I pulled what is said off of a damn WikiHow so don’t try this at home. AN: Another collab piece for the BNHarem server! Have some Halloween Bakugou! This came out softer than I imagined it would but I just enjoy writing him as a sarcastic grump. Also, I didn’t mean to put in the Shinkami but it happened so we’re rolling with it.  I honestly don’t know what this is but I hope you enjoy it! Please check out the Masterlist for this collab HERE My Masterlist is HERE Buy me a KoFi HERE --

Every night, you dream at least ten dreams a night Do you remember the dreams? If you do, you're well on your way To having some fantastic times when you close your eyes. - Bring Me The Horizon - Steal Something

Bakugou lugged the last box up the porch steps and into the house, bypassing the living area and depositing it on the kitchen counter. Wiping his brow with the back of his hand, he surveyed the mess around him.

God, he hated moving.

“That’s the last of it?” Kirishima asked as he entered the kitchen behind him. “I’m so tired already.”

Bakugou just grunted in response, turning around to walk back outside and close up the moving truck. It was still early in the day, so they had plenty of time to start unpacking and get the house into some sense of livability before they needed to return the vehicle, and he wanted to get as much done as he could while he still had the energy.

Kirishima was on the phone when he came back inside, chattering happily as he leaned against the counter. When he hung up, he grinned. “The squad is going to come by and help!”

Ignoring the stupid nickname they’d adopted for their friend group, Bakugou shot the redhead a look. “You mean they’re going to come here and fucking distract you.”

“No! Mina hasn’t seen the place yet, and Denki promised to bring food. They want to help us unpack!”

Bakugou snorted. “Sure. Whatever. Just tell them to stay out of my way.” He walked over to a box labeled “dishes” and got to work, unwrapping the newspaper from around them and placing them on the counter.

Kirishima left him alone to move the furniture around in the living room and, presumably, hook up the TV. He let his mind wander, thinking about how they’d ended up finding this place. It was in a little suburban neighborhood, a park across the street with an excellent path for his morning runs, a convenience store around the corner for Kirishima’s late-night beef jerky cravings, a short walk to the train station, and three stops away from their university. 

Rooming with Kirishima was a given, too. He was the only one Bakugou could tolerate for long periods, and he knew how to handle Bakugou’s erratic moods. He didn’t push too hard, gave him space when he needed it, and was moderately neat. Bakugou knew if he’d roomed with someone like Kaminari, he’d spend the rest of his life in a jail cell, so Kirishima was the safe option.

It helped that they were going to the same school, even though they had completely opposite majors. Bakugou was studying physics, and Kirishima was going for sports education. Sometimes he pictured Kirishima as a school gym teacher, and it made him roll his eyes. He’d be perfect for something like that. 

One day Bakugou would be a nuclear physicist and win a Nobel prize. That was the goal, anyway. Number one in his field, his face on the cover of Time magazine, everyone would know his name some day. Nothing was going to stop him from reaching the top.

He had nearly finished unpacking the dishes when Sero walked into the kitchen carrying bags of snacks and soda. Kaminari followed behind him and dropped three pizza boxes on the island in the middle of the room and shot Bakugou a funny look. “Mina is scared to come inside.”

Snorting, he raised his eyebrow. “What?”

“She says she’s got a bad vibe, dude. I don’t know.” Sero shrugged. “You’re the most logical one, maybe you can get her to come in. Kiri’s trying and failing, man.”

Grumbling under his breath, wondering why he even bothered with these idiots, Bakugou stomped out of the room to see Kirishima leaning in the frame of the front door and talking to someone out on the porch.

“...been here all day, Mina. Nothing weird has happened.” 

“Oi, Raccoon Eyes, what’s your problem?” He shoved Kirishima out of the way to get a look at the girl, his eyebrows furrowed.

She looked nervous, her eyes flitting to the windows up on the second floor, her hands clasped in front of her. “I don’t know, Bakugou. Something just doesn’t feel right. I can’t explain it.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” He crossed his arms over his chest and stared her down. “What are you even talking about?”

“Mina’s always been sensitive to energies and stuff, Bakubro,” Sero said from somewhere behind him. “She burned sage at my apartment when I moved in because she said something felt off.”

He vaguely remembered that Ashido had always been into some weird shit; Ouiji boards and hypnosis, tarot cards and reading people’s auras. Bakugou didn’t believe in that hippy dippy shit, especially being a man of science, but if it ended this dumb standoff on his front porch, he’d let her do whatever. 

Wrinkling his nose, he sighed. “If I let you burn that nasty shit in here, will you come inside?” 

“It might help…” trailing off, she stepped back. “I can just tell that something bad happened here. You don’t feel anything?”

“Fuck no.” 

“It just feels...sad.” Mina shivered, frowning.

“That’s because I haven’t hung up my Crimson Riot posters yet.” Kiri gave Mina a placating smile, stepping forward and placing his hand on her shoulder. “Let me take you to the store to get what you need, huh? We can talk about it in the car.”

Mina looked like she wanted to get as far away from the house as possible as quickly as possible, so she nodded.

Sero handed Kirishima his keys, since he was parked behind Kiri’s dumb ass truck, and the two of them headed out. Bakugou went back inside to finish the rest of his unpacking, slightly annoyed by the whole situation.

“What do you think it is?” Kaminari asked, opening the top pizza box and grabbing a slice. “I’ve never seen her like that before.”

“Maybe there’s a ghost here or something.” Sero chuckled. “Maybe you’ll open up a closet door somewhere upstairs and there will be a portal to the other side.” He wiggled his fingers at Kaminari, laughing. “Carol Ann, go into the light!”

“Idiots. There’s no such thing as ghosts.” Bakugou slammed the cabinet shut after he’d loaded in the last of the glasses. “She’s just being weird, as usual.”

“Hey, man. Don’t be like that.” Licking grease off his thumb (like a heathen, Bakugou thought), Kaminari fixed him with a look. “She looked genuinely terrified. It’s nice of you to let her burn the sage though. It’ll give her peace of mind.”

“Smells awful, though. But she says it worked at my place.” Sero added.

Bakugou had had enough of the conversation, so he just grunted in response, turning and leaving the room. 

He figured it was time to set up his bedroom, that way he didn’t have to worry about it later that night. Plus, it would get him away from dumb and dumber and Kaminari’s inability to use a napkin like a normal human being.

--

Later on, after Mina made the entire house smell like burnt ass, Kirishima took Kaminari with him to return the moving truck, Sero following behind him in his car. Mina stayed with Bakugou in his room as he put together his bookshelf, sitting quietly and making herself useful by unpacking his books and stacking them by author so he could arrange them when he was done. He wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but her silence was irking him. She was never this quiet.

“What’s your problem?” He asked gruffly, frowning at the allen key in his hand as he twisted a screw into the base of the bookshelf.

He glanced up when she sighed, her body moving to lean against the bed, her head falling back so her gaze was fixed on the ceiling. “Nothing. I just feel like the sage didn’t work.” 

Bakugou clicked his tongue. “Why should it? That stuff isn’t real anyway.”

“It is so!” He saw her glare at him from his peripheral. “You shouldn’t dismiss it so quickly.”

“I’m a science major, idiot.” He didn’t feel the need to elaborate further.

“So?”

“So, what? Science can explain away all of the so called phenomena that people like to believe are ghosts. There is no scientific proof that ghosts exist. All of the things that people attribute to hauntings are hallucinations are tricks that your mind plays on you. It’s all in your head.” He stood up, lifting the finished bookshelf to stand beside him. “Besides, you’ve been here all day and nothing bad has happened, has it?”

Crossing her arms over her chest, Mina bit her bottom lip. “Well, no. It’s just...it feels anxious and sad in here? So it’s not that I expect anything bad to happen, really. It’s just uncomfortable.” 

Choosing not to comment further, Bakugou pushed the bookcase up against the wall, picking up the drill nearby so he could anchor it into the sheetrock.

When he was done drilling, she continued. “You shouldn’t shit all over my beliefs, either. It’s not nice.”

“Since when have you ever known me to be nice?” He pointed at one of her stacks. “Give me the A’s.”

“Fair point.” Mina stood, picking up a few books from the first stack and handing them to him. “Just do me a favor and be careful. If anything weird happens, let me know, okay?”

Bakugou bit back a groan. “Will it shut you up about it if I agree?” She nodded. “Fine. I’ll let you know if you need to call an old priest and a young priest to perform an exorcism, okay?”

Mina snorted at that, handing him another set of books. “Okay, good.”

--

Bakugou blinked sleepy, pressing his face into his pillow and breathing deeply. Waking up in a new room was disorienting, the light from the window hitting his face in a way he wasn’t used to. He sighed, closing his eyes again, annoyed that he’d woken before his alarm went off. 

He was just convincing himself to go back to sleep until it was time to get up when a soft groan from beside him made him pause, his eyes flying open at the sound. Turning his head, his mouth went dry at the sight of you laying beside him, your hair strewn over the pillow next to his, bare shoulders peeking out from underneath the covers.

Mind racing, he tried to remember who you were and what had led to you sleeping in his bed beside him. The last thing he could recall was shuffling off to bed early as usual, leaving his friends in the living room, the group of them laying haphazardly across the couches as they watched a movie. 

He hadn’t gone out or drank anything, so there was no way he could have met you at a bar. It’d be easier to explain that way, because he was no stranger to drunken one night stands. 

Opening his mouth to ask you what the fuck you were doing in his bed, the words were stuck in his throat when you turned around to gaze sleepily at him.

You were pretty, even with the sleep in your eyes and your unruly bedhead. Your smile was what made him pause, heart stopping and beautiful.

“Morning, Katsu.” You sighed, burrowing your face into his chest.

“What the fuck?” He managed, scooting away and frowning. “Who are you?”

“Ah, the million dollar question.” Giggling, you sat up, one arm moving to keep the sheet covering your obviously bare chest. “Normally I’d be offended that you don’t know it, but, it’s par for the course.” 

“How did you-”

“Get here? Through the front door, just like anyone else.” Shaking your head, you used your free hand to rub at your eyes. “I’m not really sure how this works, honestly. Maybe we just need to try again later.” You frowned, shrugging your shoulders and changing the subject. “You’re very warm, you know that?”

Frustration bubbled up in his chest. Why couldn’t you just answer his questions the way he meant them?

Before he could press further, you yawned, turning and shuffling to the edge of the bed. He watched in silence as you stood, his gaze lingering on your naked backside as you pulled on a pair of panties. He was quiet as you dressed, watching your movements and racking his brain, trying to figure out what the hell was going on. Turning to look over at him again, you smiled. “Well, guess I should get out of your hair.”

Your cryptic words left him floundering, his eyes widening as you headed for the bedroom door. “Where the fuck are you going?”

Pausing, you turned to speak to him over your shoulder. “Time’s up. Your alarm is about to go off.”

Eyebrows furrowed, he watched as you opened the door and walked over the threshold. 

The blaring of his alarm startled him into a sitting position, his chest tight as he gasped for breath. What the fuck?

“A dream.” He grumbled, lying back down, his arm reaching out to smack the snooze button on the top of his clock. 

Rubbing his face tiredly, he groaned. It was very rare that he dreamt anything at all, so the thought hadn’t even crossed his mind. He had no idea who you were, he couldn’t remember ever seeing your face before, so he wasn’t sure why his mind had conjured you up to be the one in his bed.

He remembered reading an article once about dreams, and how it was impossible for your brain to make up people’s faces. It was believed that faces you have seen in passing in a crowd, even those you didn’t consciously look at, were stored somewhere in your memory, and could be brought forth in your mind in a dream. Maybe that’s where you’d come from.

He sighed, shifting in bed until his feet were on the floor, turning off his alarm for good and standing up. Stretching, he decided to forget all about you, focusing on the day ahead. He didn’t have time to dwell on dumb shit like dreams. He blamed it on his mind trying to get used to being in a new place, and left it behind him. 

--

“We really have to stop meeting like this, handsome.”

Bakugou opened his eyes, squinting over at you as you lay beside him, your head propped up on your hand. This was the fourth day in a row, and he was getting tired of it already.

“Again? What the fuck.” He slumped back onto the pillow below him. “Why the hell do I keep dreaming about you? I don’t even know you.”

You giggled, shrugging. “Kirishima sleeps like the dead, so you were my only option.”

“What does that mean? I’m getting tired of your cryptic bullshit, shitty woman.”

“Hey, you don’t need to call me names, Katsu.”

Growling, he sat up. “Well, you won’t tell me your real one, so I have to be creative.” He paused. “And how do you know my name? I don’t even let my hair for brains roommate call me that, and we’ve known each other since we were 16.”

“I figured you wouldn’t mind. I can just call you Bakugou if it makes you more comfortable.” 

“None of this makes me comfortable, you idiot. I don’t even understand what’s going on here.” He was tired. Ever since he’d started dreaming of you he woke up feeling like he’d barely gotten any rest, and it was grating on his nerves. “Why can’t you ever just be straight with me?”

Shrugging, you made yourself more comfortable in his blankets. He jolted when he felt your cold toes press against his calf. “It’s more fun this way, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, maybe for you.” He let himself lay back beside you, folding his arms behind his head and staring at the ceiling. “Have we met before?”

Humming thoughtfully, you snuggled up against him again, your fingers ghosting patterns across his bare chest. “Nope. Kind of wish we had though. You’re pretty cute.”

Huffing through his nose, he ignored the fact that he didn’t shy away from your touch like he usually did. “I’m not fucking cute.” Secretly, he liked the praise.

“Would you rather me tell you that you’re hot?” You peered up at him, smirking. 

“Fuck you.”

You snorted, rolling your eyes. “Hm. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

The thought had crossed his mind once or twice. The fact that he always woke up in these dreams naked next to you wasn’t helping the matter. “You wish.”

The grin you shot him was almost sinister, and he felt his cock stir beneath the blankets.

What the ever loving fuck.

Almost as if you knew what he was thinking, you pressed against him, your lips brushing against his ear. “Wish we had more time, Katsuki, but your alarm is about to go off again.”

Bakugou shot up in bed, his heart racing and skin damp with sweat, a shiver racing down his spine. He could still feel your warm breath on his ear, like you’d just pulled away. 

When he looked over, he was alone. 

—

“You been sleeping okay, Bakubro?” Kirishima asked him from the doorway to the kitchen, his ridiculously bulky arms crossed over his equally ridiculous chest. 

Bakugou looked up from his toast, his head aching. “Like fuck I have.” 

His friend raised an eyebrow at him. “You look like hell, dude. And I mean that in the nicest way possible.”

“Fuck you.” Sighing, he dropped his toast on his plate, wiping his hand on his napkin and hunching over. “I keep having these weird dreams.” He paused, turning to look at the redhead. “What about you?”

“Me?” Kirishima pushed off the door and walked to the fridge, wrenching open the door and pulling out a carton of orange juice. “I’ve been sleeping fine. Best sleep I’ve had in a while actually. It’s nice not having all the campus noises around and stuff, you know?”

“Kirishima sleeps like the dead, so you were my only option.” Your words rattled around in his brain, and he frowned. 

“I don’t know, dude. I think you’re overworking yourself.”

Bakugou growled. “I’m trying to land that internship. I don’t have time to be a lazy asshole.”

“Hey, I’m not lazy!”

“I didn’t say you were. Guilty conscience?” He couldn’t help the smirk that curled onto his face.

Kirishima took a sip of juice straight from the carton, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand when he was done. “Shut up.” He grinned, his shark teeth on display. “You should take a day off, maybe. Or just, don’t study all day on Saturday and hang out with me! The squad is coming by for a barbeque. Maybe it’ll help if you just relax.”

He made a disgusted face when Kirishima put the carton of orange juice back in the fridge, making a mental note to buy a new one. Gross. “Being around you idiots will just stress me out some more.” He finished his toast, standing up to put his dish in the sink. “I’ve got a late lab tonight, so order some takeout.”

“You got it, man.” Kirishima grabbed his shoulder as he passed him. “Hey, think about Saturday, okay? I’m kinda worried about you.”

Shrugging him off, Bakugou nodded. “Yeah, whatever. I’ll think about it.”

—

Things progressed in mostly the same way for the remainder of the week. He got up, went to school, stayed late in the lab working on his project for the internship interview, and collapsed into bed when he got home. 

When he closed his eyes, he was back in that dream with you by his side. 

He liked to make you laugh, and it didn’t seem hard to do. You got a kick out of his shitty attitude for some reason, and you liked to listen to stories about his dumb friends. You seemed particularly fond of Kaminari, mentioning you knew someone that would probably like him. You seemed more morose than usual when you talked about your friend, and when he asked why, you just shrugged and said you hadn’t seen him in a while.

“So you aren’t just a figment of my imagination?” Bakugou asked, folding his arms behind his head.

You shook your head, your hair brushing his chin as you laid on his chest. He’d gotten used to the cuddling, and though he enjoyed it, he’d never mention that out loud.

“Of course I’m not, Katsu.” Sighing, you tilted your head to look up at him. “Man, you’re taking way too long to figure this out.”

“You’re not very forthcoming with information about yourself, idiot.” He grumbled, annoyed. “What’s your friend’s name, anyway?”

“Shinsou Hitoshi.” You grinned, a faraway look in your eyes. “He’s my best friend. I kind of miss him.”

“Why don’t you call him?”

“Can’t. It’s fine though.” You sat up further, hovering over him. “Maybe you could get him to meet Kaminari. He needs a little sunshine in his life. He used to work at that cat café over by the university. Bet he’s still there.”

“Cat café?” Bakugou wracked his brain. “Next to that udon place?”

“That’s the one. He’s got purple hair, you literally can’t miss him.” 

Bakugou snorted. He didn’t give two shits about his blonde friend and his love life. But if this Shinsou guy knew you, maybe he could get some answers. 

—

“Since when do you like cats?” Kaminari asked, falling into step beside him.

Bakugou was regretting his entire existence as he walked, wishing he didn’t give enough of a shit to find out more about you. Kaminari had been chattering beside him non-stop the entire train ride over, wondering why Bakugou was insisting on visiting the café and why he had to be the one to accompany him.

“I’ve always liked cats. Just shut up, dunceface.” Huffing, he shoved his hands in his pockets. He was unsure how he was even going to talk to this Shinsou guy, what he was going to say. “Hi, you don’t know me but I think I’m having dreams about your friend?”

“Mauhaus Cat Café?” Kaminari giggled, breaking Bakugou out of his thoughts. “If this place isn’t full of hot goth boys I don’t want any part of it.”

Rolling his eyes, Bakugou opened the door and let Kaminari walk in first. Standing behind the counter looking half asleep and thoroughly done with life stood a man with purple hair. 

“Oh, I think I’ve died and gone to heaven.” Kaminari stopped and stared, and Bakugou nearly walked into his back.

“Oi, idiot, come on.” Grumbling about his friend under his breath, he pushed him further inside, neck craning back to read the neat chalkboard menu over the coffee machines. 

Kaminari, on the other hand, shook his head and waltzed up to the counter, a bright smile on his face. “Hey there, tall, dark, and handsome.”

Amethyst eyes gazed at Kaminari, his facial expression flat. “Oh joy, a loud blonde.”

Bakugou snorted. “Are you Shinsou Hitoshi?”

The man stood up straighter and covered his nametag with his hand. “That depends on who’s asking.”

Kaminari, being Kaminari, grinned a little wider. “I’m Kaminari Denki, and I think I love you.”

Shinsou blinked at him, his eyes alight with amusement. “Oh yeah?” Bakugou saw him glance down at the leather choker on Kaminari’s neck, before his eyes flicked back up to his face.

They’d known each other for two seconds and they were already eye fucking. Wonderful.

“Trust me on this, dude. You and I are going to get along great.” Kaminari turned to Bakugou. “Why have you been hiding this gorgeous boy from me, Bakugou? I thought we were friends.”

“We’re not. Now go away.” He pointed to a brindle colored cat sitting on a table on the far side of the room. “Go pet a cat or something.”

“Oh! Look how pretty!” Kaminari wandered away, not before throwing Shinsou a wink over his shoulder and biting his lip in a way he probably thought was sultry.

Shinsou seemed to be eating it up, but he was a bit more subtle. Bakugou almost felt bad for the guy, before he remembered that he didn’t care.

“How do you know my name?” Shinsou asked, tearing his eyes away from Kaminari. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you here before.”

Nodding, he shoved his hands deeper in his pockets. “No, we’ve never met. A friend of yours told me about you, and I just...I wanted to ask you something.” Frowning, he pushed on, knowing how weird he was about to sound. “She said you were her best friend.”

Shinsou snorted. “I don’t really have any friends, man. Who was it?”

“That’s just it...I don’t know her name.”

“Okay, but she told you mine? That doesn’t really add up.” Shinsou’s eyes narrowed. “What does she look like?”

Bakugou described you, cutting himself off when he noticed how pale Shinsou suddenly looked. The slight look of horror on his face turned to anger so fast that Bakugou got whiplash.

“Do you think this is funny or something, asshole?” Shinsou’s voice was low and dangerous. “Get the fuck out of my shop before I kick the shit out of you.”

“What? What the fuck is your problem?” Bakugou was always quick to anger, but he especially didn’t like being threatened. 

Kaminari must have sensed that things were about to go south, because he appeared at Bakugou’s side a moment later. “Is everything okay?”

“You think this is some kind of joke? Like I don’t miss her and think about her every day? Like I don’t blame myself for what happened?” Shinsou’s deep voice cracked slightly at the end of his question, and Bakugou was horrified to see tears starting to gather in his eyes.

“What are you even talking about? Who is she?” He was starting to get really frustrated.

Shinsou moved to round the counter. “Fuck you, man. Get the fuck-” 

“Bakugou, who are you talking about?” Kaminari turned to Shinsou, his palm pressing gently to his chest to stop him from reaching Bakugou. “What’s going on?”

“Your friend here thinks it’s funny to come into my shop and rub my best friend’s death in my face.”

Bakugou choked on his own spit. “Death?”

Kaminari looked between the two of them in confusion. “Bakugou?”

He didn’t want to do this in front of Kaminari, but he had no choice. “I’ve been having dreams! Ever since we moved into the house…” Trailing off, he stared at Shinsou. “I didn’t know she - how is this even possible?”

“So, Shinsou’s best friend has been visiting your dreams, and she’s...no longer with us. She told you about Shinsou, so you came here to find out more?” Kaminari summarized, letting his hand drop from Shinsou’s chest when he noticed he wasn’t struggling anymore.

Bakugou just nodded, his fists clenched at his sides. 

“What house?” Shinsou asked. “Is she…”

Bakugou told him the address and Shinsou practically crumpled in on himself, his breath coming out in short pants. Kaminari had enough sense to guide him over to a nearby table and sit him down on a chair. Bakugou was glad the shop was empty.

Somehow completely level headed in this brief moment of crisis, Kaminari went around the shop counter and came back with a cup of water for Shinsou. He then pushed Bakugou, who was still standing frozen in front of the register, into the chair across from Shinsou, and then pulled up his own chair. “Shinsou, hey. Can you tell us about her?”

--

Heart pounding, Bakugou woke up in a dream. 

This was different.

Instead of waking up to you lying beside him, looking disheveled but beautiful as you teased him and held the blankets over your naked chest…

He was sweating, breath coming in short pants, his fingers tangled in someone’s hair, wet heat surrounding his cock.

Bakugou’s eyes flew open, taking in the white ceiling of his bedroom. He let his gaze travel down, the dark comforter on his bed hiding the identity of the person between his legs.

He didn’t need to see them to know who it was.

You hummed around him and his toes curled. He should definitely be freaking out right now, kicking you off of him and flying from the bed to the other side of the room, hiding his modesty as he screeched at you.

But then you did this thing with your tongue that he couldn’t even begin to describe and his eyes rolled back. It had been a while, he reasoned. He was too preoccupied with school and moving and not sleeping right to take care of it himself. 

Letting his fingers card through your hair, he tugged, reveling in the groan that left your throat and shot right through him. He rocked his hips in time with your bobbing mouth, biting down on his bottom lip to hold back his moans.

He felt himself getting close, eyes fluttering shut again as he let himself get lost in the moment. Later, he would contemplate how easily he accepted what you were doing, but for now, he was going to enjoy every second of it.

“Y/N…” He groaned, pushing his head back into the pillows. 

All at once, your mouth was off of him, and he felt the blanket fly off of his body, exposing his hard and aching cock to the cool air.

“What!?” Your voice was wrecked, but he was too keyed up to pay much attention.

Popping his eyes open, he groaned and sat up on his elbows. “What the fuck, shitty woman? I was about to come.”

“How do you know my name?”

Suddenly, everything came rushing back to him. He remembered where he was, who you were, what you were. “Fuck. What the fuck?”

“Learn another word, Katsuki. Jesus Christ.” You were still kneeling between his legs, your hand resting on his thigh. “How did you find out my name?”

Flopping back against the pillow again, he rubbed his hands tiredly over his face. “I met Shinsou today.” His dick was still so hard that it hurt, but he had a feeling you wouldn’t be helping him take care of the problem anymore.

You were quiet, so he peeked through his fingers, frowning. You were crying silently, tears sliding down your cheeks. “He told you?”

“We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” He said finally, letting his hands drop from his face. He didn’t know why he was being so nice. Usually he’d tell someone who cried in front of him to suck it up, but it felt wrong to give you a hard time. Sighing, he threw his arm out to the side. “Come here.”

You sniffled again, climbing over his leg and settling on the bed beside him, your head resting on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around you. “I’m sorry, Katsuki.”

“For what? Don’t apologize.” He grunted. “But later we’re going to have a conversation about what was going on when I got here.”

“That’s the first time you were you during it, I think.” Your voice was rough, and you sniffled loudly when you were done speaking.

“What does that even mean?” His brow furrowed in confusion. “Wait, that’s happened more than once? What the hell?”

Giggling, you nodded. “What, do you think I just get naked and climb into bed with you every time?” He huffed, and you continued. “It’s like...it’s you of course, but it’s like all of a sudden something clicks.” You snapped your fingers. “I’m not sure if I’m just tapping into your fantasies or what…”

He could feel the blush heating up his cheeks and he hated it, so he chose not to comment. 

“Usually I come in and you’re waiting for me, we get naked, then we fuck, then we cuddle, and that’s when you get here.”

“Tch. No way. I don’t cuddle.” Scoffing, he tightened his grip around you. 

This time you snorted a laugh, your hand sliding over his stomach as you got more comfortable. “Oh? You do with me, teddy bear.”

“Shut the fuck up! Don’t call me that.” He shivered. “That’s the worst pet name I’ve ever heard.”

“I’ll try to be more creative next time.” You shifted again, pulling the blanket over both of your legs. “And, if you don’t cuddle, then what are we doing right now?”

“Having a conversation.” 

“About?” You moved to look at him, raising your eyebrow.

Fighting hard not to smirk, he rolled his eyes. “Not cuddling.”

“You’re impossible.”

“You’re annoying.”  He hissed when you pinched his side. “Ow! What the hell?”

“Shut up and go back to sleep, Katsu.”

--

Bakugou Katsuki did NOT ask for help. The word help was not in his vocabulary. He could do everything and figure everything out on his own, thank you. However, he thought maybe, just this once, he was in over his head. 

He didn’t know shit about ghosts or spirits or hauntings or whatever the fuck this was. Mina, as Kaminari had pointed out to him after they’d left Mauhaus, was practically an expert. He was dreading the moment when she rubbed it in his face that she had been right about the house all along, but his annoyance over it paled in comparison to the need he had for a night of uninterrupted sleep.

Not that he minded, really, because he got to spend time with you.

The sudden affection that he had for you was unnerving. Because, besides the whole not asking for help thing, the other constant in his life was that Bakugou Katsuki did not catch feelings. Feelings were unnecessary. He hated them. He hated being fond of people, the weird ache in his chest made him want to puke. The only person he felt any kind of warmth for was Kirishima, and that was because he was his best friend. He tolerated everyone else to a degree, but he didn’t feel anything for them.

But then there was you, who he’d known for an entire two weeks. (He wasn’t even going to unpack the fact that you were literally haunting his dreams in which he was apparently fucking you.) Somehow, through the brief interactions you’d had, whether they were real or not, he’d managed to care about you. You were funny, and you didn’t put up with his shit.

It would figure that the only girl he’d ever had feelings for was dead.

He had come to terms with that fact now. His next course of action was to find out why you were coming to him. Mina was the only one he knew who could help him find some answers. (He didn’t really trust the internet.) The problem was getting her alone without the rest of the idiot brigade around. Kaminari knew, obviously, but he just wanted to talk to Mina.

His chance came on Saturday, when everyone came to his and Kirishima’s house for the barbeque. 

Bakugou was slicing vegetables in the kitchen when Mina came inside, offering to help. He grunted, pointing at a bowl of spinach. “Finish making the salad, raccoon eyes.” 

Mina rolled her eyes and stood beside him, taking the tomatoes he’d chopped and adding them to the bowl. “So, how’s the house-”

“What do you know about ghosts?” He blurted. Well, that was one way to ask.

She stiffened beside him. “Did you see something?”

Huffing through his nose, he picked up a cucumber and began slicing it a little harder than necessary to mask his discomfort. “Maybe.”

“Bakugou, what happened?” She grabbed his shirt sleeve, tugging on it. “Is it bad? Do we have to set up surveillance cameras or something?”

He snorted. “No, this isn’t a dumb horror movie.” Shrugging her off of his arm, he pushed the cucumbers towards her. “I’ve been having dreams-“

“How do you know it’s a ghost?” She interrupted, turning back to the salad.

Bakugou decided to be as vague as possible. “It’s the same dream every night, the same person. She never told me her name, but I was able to figure out who she is. She used to live here...” Swallowing thickly, he turned to look at her. “I just don’t know why she’s visiting me.”

“Well, most of the time ghosts are spirits that are still tied to this world in some way. People believe they have unfinished business, something they need to do before they can pass on.” Mina looked thoughtful for a moment. “Maybe she has regrets?”

Grunting, he went back to chopping. “I don’t know, it’s weird. She said she picked me because she tried Kirishima and she couldn’t reach him or whatever.”

“Maybe she thinks you're cute, Bakubabe.” Mina teased him.

“Fuck you.”

“Okay, alright, sorry!” Mina held up her hands in surrender. “So, she’s here somewhere, huh? I wonder why she hasn’t appeared to you outside of your dreams.”

“No idea. I wish she would though, I haven’t slept right since we moved in.”

“Do you know what happened to her?” 

Bakugou stopped chopping, thinking back to the other day at the cat cafe.

“I was working the late shift that night, and Y/N was home alone.” Shinsou rubbed his face, leaning back in his chair. “There had been a bunch of break ins in the area, so I told her to lock the door and leave the light and the TV on in the living room, that way it looked like someone was up. They must have been watching the house though, because it didn’t deter them.”

Bakugou swallowed thickly, his eyes glued to Shinsou as he stared down at the cup of water Kaminari had gotten him. He felt rage bubbling up in his chest, and he had to talk himself out of going to find whoever did this to you and making them pay. 

“Oh no, Shinsou, I’m so sorry.” Kaminari put his hand on his shoulder. “Did they catch who did it?”

Nodding, Shinsou finally looked up, eyes meeting Bakugou’s. “It was two guys. One of them turned themselves in, and the police were able to catch the other that way. They apparently had never agreed on killing anyone, they were just supposed to be looting. Not like they would have gotten a lot from us anyway, unless they had a thing for Siouxsie and the Banshees records and Funko Pops.”

“How-” Bakugou said suddenly, before closing his mouth and shaking his head. He didn’t really want to know.

“Shot her.” Shinsou said stiffly. 

“Fuck.” Kaminari breathed. 

“What does she say to you.” Bakugou blinked at the purple-haired man, realizing he was speaking to him. 

“Mostly she makes fun of me.” Crossing his arms over his chest, he sat back in the chair. “She was telling me how she missed you, wanted me to introduce you to Pikachu over here.” He nodded his chin at Kaminari. “Said you needed some sunshine or some shit.”

Snorting, Shinsou’s lip curled into a half smile. “Sounds like her.”

“So what now?” Kaminari asked. “Why is she visiting you?”

“Hell if I know. She mentioned this place and you and I kind of just wanted to see if I was making it all up in my head or something.”

“It’s kind of hard to believe. I don’t really know what to make of it.” Rubbing his eyes tiredly, Shinsou sighed. “I know you’re telling me the truth, though. Sorry for yelling at you.”

“Tch. It’s fine.” Bakugou didn’t blame the guy, honestly. 

“I think you should talk to Mina,” Kaminari said suddenly. “She knows a lot about this kind of stuff for some reason. She tried burning that sage, remember?”

“She told me she didn’t think it worked.”

“Sage is used for cleansing. It’s supposed to ward off evil. I don’t think Y/N fits the description.” Shinsou hummed. “She’s a soft hearted nerd.”

Mina gasped, eyes wide. “That’s so awful. That’s why this place feels so sad.” She turned back to the salad in front of her. “We should have a séance.”

Bakugou made a face, picturing that scene from Beetlejuice. “No one is going to be singing that god damn Banana Boat song at my kitchen table, fuck that.”

Snorting, Mina rolled her eyes. “You watch too many movies.” 

When the vegetables were chopped, he moved to the sink to wash his hands. “What will that do?”

“A séance? It’s a way to communicate with the dead. Maybe we can get her to come forward and speak to us, we can try to find out what she wants.”

Bakugou couldn’t explain the flash of panic that he felt suddenly. “Is that...going to get rid of her?”

His pink-haired friend blinked at him owlishly. “You don’t want her to go, do you?” 

He didn’t really have an answer to that, his ears burning hot. He shifted uncomfortably and snapped his mouth closed.

“You like her.” 

It was just a statement, and he couldn’t form the words to deny it. His embarrassment turned quickly to fury when he saw the look of pity in her eyes. “Don’t you dare.”

“Oh, Katsuki.” She reached out to touch his shoulder and he jerked away. “You can’t-”

“Don’t tell me what I can and can’t fucking do.” He seethed. “And don’t call me that.”

“She’s dead, Bakugou.”

“You think I don’t know that already? Do I look stupid?” He was trying to keep from lashing out, his hands forming into fists at his side. He could feel himself shaking.

“What is going on here?” Kirishima asked from the doorway, brows furrowed. He looked between his two friends, arms crossed across his chest.

Bakugou shot Mina a pleading look. She quirked her brow in confusion, until she finally caught on. “You didn’t tell him? Bakugou, he lives here too, he has a right to know.”

“Shut up! I know that! I just...haven’t gotten around to it.”

“Tell me what?” Kirishima looked even more confused.

Kaminari chose that moment to waltz into the kitchen, bypassing everyone and plucking a piece of cucumber from the salad on the counter. He shoved it in his mouth and chewed thoughtfully. Everyone watched him, Bakugou more wary than the rest, until he spun around and shot finger guns at Kirishima. “Your house is haunted, my friend.”

--

Bakugou opened the front door to see Shinsou standing on his front porch, looking like he’d rather be anywhere else.

The ash blonde shared the sentiment.

Mina was in the dining area, draping a black tablecloth over the table and setting up candles. Kaminari was bouncing nervously on the balls of his feet, relaxing infinitesimally when Shinsou walked in the room behind Bakugou.

“Hey, Hitoshi.”

Oh, they were on a first name basis already.

It had been a week since the barbeque, and his forced confession to Kirishima about what had been going on since they’d moved into the house.

Kirishima had taken the news way better than he’d expected.

“Oh, you’ve seen her too?”

“What?” Bakugou froze, his eyebrows disappearing into his hair.

“I mean, I keep seeing shit out of the corner of my eye, and I thought I was going crazy or something.” He shrugged, helping Sero set the plates on the table. “I’d blink and she’d be gone. I guess I kind of got used to it after a while. I never felt scared or anything like that, and she never bothered me. It was like she was just watching.”

“She thinks you’re nice,” Bakugou mumbled, slumping into a chair.

Kirishima chuckled. “I am nice, bro.”

The rest of the evening had consisted of everyone bothering him with questions, and Mina preparing everyone for tonight’s séance. Kaminari had insisted that Shinsou should participate, and Mina had agreed, saying it would help to have someone close to her in the room. She had decided to drop the subject of Bakugou’s other admission, the one only she had heard.

He was kind of in love with you. 

It was selfish, wasn’t it? You didn’t belong here anymore, and he couldn’t have a relationship with you. He would drive himself crazy if he tried to keep going the way he had been, running on little to no sleep and burying himself in his textbooks, spending his free time researching the paranormal and diving into the dark recesses of the web. When he caught himself on a questionable website that talked about resurrection and spells he knew he’d taken a turn down a road he didn’t want to travel. 

He wanted to go back in time, to meet you before your death. Maybe you would have dated him, and you wouldn’t have lived in this house with Shinsou. You wouldn’t have been here when those assholes broke in. You’d still be alive.

Kirishima’s warm hand resting on his shoulder shook him from his thoughts. “You alright, man?”

He shrugged his friend’s hand away. “Peachy. Can we get this over with?”

Shinsou hummed in agreement. “It feels really weird to be in this house with other people’s stuff.” He didn’t need to mention how uncomfortable it felt to be in this place with everything that happened, but he didn’t have to. It was written all over his face.

Mina was lighting candles and calling everyone to the table, her normally bright and cheery expression gone, replaced with a serious and forlorn look. Kaminari introduced Shinsou to all their friends as they all took their seats, Mina at one end of the table and Bakugou at the other.

“Did you bring something of hers?” Mina asked Shinsou.

The purple-haired man nodded, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small battered book. “Her notebook. She carried it around with her and wrote down things to remember, stupid poems, little doodles.” He handed it to Kaminari, who passed it to Mina. “Also, I have this photo, I don’t know if it helps.”

He turned it to show it to Bakugou, and he felt his chest ache. You were smiling, wearing a ridiculous maid’s outfit, your hair frizzed out with a little white bonnet pinned to it. Shinsou stood beside you, wearing a plague doctor’s mask and a button up coat. 

“Halloween a few years ago. She was Magenta from Rocky Horror, and I refused to wear fishnets and heels to be her Dr. Frank-N-Furter.” A small smile appeared on his face. “She was a riot.” He leaned forward and placed the photo next to the notebook in the center of the table.

“That’s perfect, Shinsou, thank you.” Mina said quietly. “Okay everyone, phones off. When you’re ready, take the hand of the person next to you. It’s very important that we keep the circle closed until we’re done, so don’t let go.”

Bakugou grumbled, switching his phone off. He rubbed his sweaty palms on the leg of his pants, and then held his hands out. Shinsou took his hand on his right, Kirishima on his left.

Mina situated the Ouija board in front of herself, and then took Sero and Kaminari’s hands in hers. “Close your eyes and clear your minds. We want to think about our purpose, of contacting Y/N. I’ll say an opening prayer and we’ll wait. I’ll repeat it until we get an answer. Make sure you remember your questions for her.”

Trying to clear his mind and ignore how stupid he felt at that moment, Bakugou let out a breath and closed his eyes. He thought about contacting you this way, wondered if he’d be able to see you.

“Together we ask the spirits this night, to send us only the blessed and bright, we claim protection for everyone here, and no evil beings can come near.” She took a deep breath and continued. “We are reaching out to Y/N. Please join us in our circle tonight when you’re ready.”

Nothing happened for several minutes, so Mina repeated her greeting. 

And that’s when Bakugou felt it. It was like fingers on the back of his neck, blunt nails scraping over his skin and tickling him, warm breath on his ear. “Y/N?”

He felt Kirishima tense beside him, a soft laugh leaving him. “Is that her?”

“What’s she doing?” Mina asked quietly.

“Playing with my hair.” he audibly swallowed. “It’s kind of nice.”

On his other side, Shinsou jerked his arm. “She just pinched me. Typical.” He snorted, chuckling fondly.

Kaminari squeaked, saying it felt like she kissed his cheek. Mina felt her squeeze her shoulder. Sero felt her tug on the ends of his hair.

Shinsou hummed. “She probably thinks you need a haircut. She used to do that to me a lot, too.”

“Y/N, are you with us?” Mina’s voice rang out into the room.

Bakugou opened his eyes, watching as Mina leaned over the board in front of her, a surprised expression on her face as the planchette began to wiggle. 

“She says yes.” Her head snapped up, smiling at all of them. “Okay, who has the first question?”

“I’ll go!” Kirishima said cheerfully. Clearing his throat nervously, he smiled that shark toothed grin of his. “Hey, Y/N. Uh, have you been hanging around and watching me work out?”

Scoffing, Bakugou turned his attention back to Mina. She watched the planchette move, snorting when it stopped moving. “She said ‘sick gains’.” 

Kirishima blushed the color of his hair. “She noticed!”

“Shut up, shitty hair. Who’s next?” Bakugou tried to tamp down the spike of jealousy he felt knowing you had been spying on his best friend.

“My turn!” Kaminari grinned. “I was going to just feed you a pickup line, but Shinsou said no, so I just wanted to thank you for helping me find him. He’s pretty great.”

The planchette wiggled again. “She said ‘notebook’.”

Shinsou sighed. “She wrote down pickup lines in it all the time. I think she wants you to look at them.”

“Yes! Oh man, so cool. Thank you Y/N!”

“She said ‘be happy’. Aw, that’s so nice!” Mina looked at Shinsou. “You want to go?”

Nodding, Shinsou closed his eyes. “Do you forgive me?”

“‘Not your fault.’” Mina read.

“But it is! If I would have been home-” He stopped when the table shook slightly. 

“She moved it to the ‘no’, Shinsou. She doesn’t blame you. I think that’s a good sign you should stop blaming yourself.”

The purple-haired man’s shoulders slumped in defeat. He seemed to look a little less haunted, like he was finally going to accept it.

Sero cleared his throat. “Hi Y/N, we don’t know each other, but I wanted to say I’m sorry for what happened to you. I’ve heard some nice things, I think you would have been a great addition to the squad.”

“It says…” Mina took a minute to follow the rapidly moving heart shaped piece of wood. “‘Beat you at Mario Kart’.”

The whole table laughed, except for Bakugou. He was too busy thinking about his question, his gut wrenching and heart squeezing in his chest. 

“Bakugou?”

Clearing his throat, he opened his mouth to speak, but nothing would come out. He felt the hairs stand up on the back of his neck, and he knew it was because you were near. “Why are you still here? Don’t you want to move on?” He hated asking. He didn’t want the answer.

He felt you move away, his body relaxing slightly, his eyes trained on the board. He couldn’t read it from here, but he could see the planchette move. 

“‘I’m not ready.’”

“Why?” Bakugou heard himself asking.

The entire room was quiet, everyone waiting with bated breath. 

“‘I’m waiting for you, Katsu.’”

#bakugou katsuki #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou katsuki smut #katsuki bakugou #katsuki bakugou x reader #bnha #bnha x reader #kingexpl0sionmurder writes #bnharem collab

[honey-makki]

grandma’s blessing

best friend!hanamaki takahiro x fem!reader

warnings: mentions of death (family member), oral (fem receiving), fire, probably unsanitary cooking conditions if i’m being honest (it’s soft i swear)

summary: the holidays are your favorite time of year. your best friend hanamaki tries to keep holiday cheer alive despite the loss of a family member.

word count 2.4k

masterlist

Holiday’s are tricky. Decisions on whether the trauma of going home will be a heavier burden to bear than the guilt and loneliness of your city apartment. GOing home was never a pleasant experience. Trips filled with parents nitpicking your seemingly successful life and emotionally battering you about anything and everything they could. The only reprieve would be hugging your grandmother and being able to see her face-to-face during dinner. She understood why you didn’t come home every opportunity and didn’t blame you a bit.

On years when it would be too much to travel, you knew that she would still give you a call. Spending all day on the phone with you while you bounced around the kitchen making much smaller portions of what they would be eating at home. Even the small amounts of silence on the call were comfortable. You could feel her next to you kneading the dough for a pie while you mixed together the fruit base. It felt like home.

The silence that has been living in your apartment the past few months after her passing was suffocating. Weekends spent with friends at their apartment just to get out of somewhere that just seems to reek of death and despair.

You had spent more nights at Makki’s place in the past month than at your own. He was your closest friend, a true confidant, someone skilled at lifting your mood, and the person you’ve been undeniably in love with for years. You accepted the fate of growing old with a horde of cats as long as you can have his silly pink hair shining in the sun when you hung out with friends. It’s ok that you are going to be alone forever as long as you still had a standing laser tag date once a month. The only thing stronger than your feelings of love towards the strawberry blond was fear of losing him.

He has been a pillar of strength during the past few months. Holding your crying body until you fall asleep on his tear-stained and snot covered chest. Setting alarms in your phone to make sure you are eating or going to work instead of sitting in a dissociative state. Ever since you shared a bed with him, he’s been a little more comfortable with physical contact. Walking closer together arms touching when going out or throwing an arm over your shoulder when lounging around the house. You can’t count the number of times you’ve both woken up in various stages of cuddling.

He was the one to bring up spending the holidays together. He had just gone home for a wedding and couldn’t afford another ticket and he knew that you were in a weird spot. “We can stay here and make dinner and bake cookies and watch shitty r-romcoms? Someone has to appreciate Hallmark movies, why not us?” You can hear his voice crack and start to speed up as a blush rises across his face. You see it but don’t really process it, more relieved that for the first time in months, the thought of holidays didn’t make you run to the bathroom and throw up. You smiled and nodded, setting plans for him to come over later in the week.

Makki always liked when you cooked, throwing a western spin on dishes he considered normal. But today, he was flabbergasted, you didn’t let him just sit on the barstool curating music while you did all the work, no, there was too much food to be made for him to laze around. You laid out the recipe for your grandmothers’ mac n’ cheese, explaining what everything meant while you got started on an asian fusion stuffing you figured out a few years back.

You stole glances at him in the middle of stirring, combining and folding everything together. His tongue sticks out between his lips while he deliberately measures out the exact amount of cheese required. In all the time you’ve seen him, you’ve never seen him totally lose his laid back air until now, and you can’t control your laugh. Is he really more serious about measuring out sharp cheddar cheese than a game that would take them to nationals? Or that physics final he actually studied for? Your heart skips a beat when you see his soft, satisfied smile to the dish he just created. All you can picture when he looks over to you is how cute of a child he must have been. Cheeks round encasing his bright smile as his head tilts ever so slightly to the left.

After he slides the last dish into the oven, you both opt for taking the time to clean the kitchen, knowing that you won’t want to do it after dinner. The dishes are washed and dried and while Makki puts away the ones that go on a higher shelf, you return flour and other ingredients to the pantry but before you put them down you call out to him, voice lighter than normal, the one you use when asking a favor.

“Taka, how upset would you be if I said I wanted to cook a little bit more?”

“You get dishes this time around then, but what are we makin’?”

You turn out of the pantry with a bounce in your step before slapping down the flour and newly acquired, chocolate chips and sprinkles. “Cookies! We always made cookies with my grandma and it wouldn’t be the same without them.” Your eyes sparkle at the thought of the sweet treats and equally sweet memories of your childhood. Makki thinks you are breathtaking.

“Let me get the bowls back down and we can probably make mediocre cookies if you have anything you do with it.” He smiles at just how cute the squawk you made from his teasing is, just happy that he gets to be here with you. He doesn’t really hear how you defend your baking skills and complain that just because you forgot flour one time doesn’t mean you are inept at baking.

He never thought he would be the type to settle down and be domestic, it just didn’t seem like something he cared a lot about, but now he he can’t rid his mind of the thought of waking up ten minutes before your alarm just to make you a cup of coffee or throwing your favorite blanket in the drier on days it’s raining so when you get home, you can melt into the soft plush and warm up instantly.The clattering of spices brings him back to the moment, turning to see you picking up the cinnamon and vanilla extract.

“You good, love?” There’s something about how you look when you flustered because of him, that scratches an itch he didn’t know was there. The first time a pet name like this had slipped through his lips he was certain that whatever line the two of you were toeing had been crossed, demolished. Instead you just tucked your hair away and averted your gaze back to whatever shitty movie the two of you were “watching” that night. Now it’s normal, well its not normal, its very much not normal for him to refer to you as love or babe and it's not normal for you to exclusivley call him by his first name. It's decidedly abnormal considering your relationship or lack thereof. But if you aren’t going to question it neither is he.

He helps you up and gather the remaining ingredients for the “famous snickerdoodle cookies” that you swear had won awards. The mixing of the dough is interrupted when he has to grab your wrist to stop you from adding salt instead of sugar. You refuse to look at him because you know he is sporting a huge smirk and raised eyebrows, knowing that he’s right about you not being the best baker. You are reprieved by the oven going off, signaling to remove the earlier and change the temperature.

“Damn, babe, these cookies look so good, especially this one.” You return to Makki who already started to lay out the dough on the baking tray. You see perfectly round blobs squished slightly by a fork for a pattern and then right in front of him you see the cookie he was talking about. You didn't expect to see your 27 year old boyfriend-who-isn’t-your-boyfriend to be holding a cockshaoped cookie. But really, you should have seen it coming from the guy who laughs when either of you fart.

He can hear the clock ticking as you just stare, annoyed. He was concerned for a second, that maybe he shouldn’t have made a lewd joke when making cookies. This is something he used to do with her grandmother, you stupid idiot.. But when he can see the apple of your cheek peeking out from behind your hand, he recognizes that face. The one that positively exudes warmth and happiness with her laughter. The butterflies always buzzing in his stomach go wild when this face comes out. He would do anything to see it for the rest of time.

You don’t know where the courage comes from but you cup his cheek for a kiss, he mirrors your action. It just felt normal, and you honestly didn’t realize that it wasn’t normal until you both pulled back. Your eyes are locked on his, both of you sporting a soft smile until his keeps growing, evolving into a laugh that is borderline offensive in how loud it is.

You don’t know why and you get a little nervous that maybe he doesn’t feel the same way, when you go to hide your face, you feel the heat rising but also a soft powdery coating? And that’s when you realize his hands are still coated in flour from shaping the cookies. Your eyes are rolling while you chuckle but Makki on the other hand is losing his mind, almost in tears from laughing while putting the cookies in the oven. “It’s not that funny, Takahiro! Get me a napkin please.”

“Nah, you look really sweet. Good enough to eat.” You weren’t surprised when he returned to kissing you, nor when he lifted you up by your thighs and plopped you on the counter. The kisses are sweet, lazy and perfect for a second kiss, and a third and a fourth. This is normal. His lips belong on yours. Your hands should be tangled up in his hair while his run over your waist and legs. This is right. There's no rush to deepen the kiss, both of you happy to just indulge in the warmth of the other, but it is inevitable. A soft nip at your bottom lip or an accidental tug of his hair, neither of you know what happened first but you both are staring at each other, panting lightly with a much darker gaze than the original flour induced makeout session.

“You are just as sweet as I thought. Gotta have a taste.” His voice is raspier than you’ve ever heard and you just let him move your body as he pleases. Pull your hips to the edge of the counter. Spread your legs as far apart as they’ll go. Lift your hips when he pulls your shorts and underwear down. Gotta act as sweet as he says I am. He has barely touched you but when he falls to his knees and just stares at your dripping slit that he's imagined for years, your eyes, you are already imagining how good he's going to feel.

You shouldn’t even try to think, his tongue exceeded any expectation or desire you had. Expertly flicking against your throbbing clit as he works two fingers in you. You feel the groan he lets out when he dips his tongue into your hole before you hear it. The vibrations reverberate up your spine and through your body, an all-consuming heat starting in your stomach, threatening to let loose, to run rampant on your body. His fingers, joined by another, return to your clenching hole and search for the spongy spot hidden deep inside. All you can hear is the blood rushing through your head, drowning out every other noise.

“C’mon love, cum on my fingers, on my tongue, I’ve wanted, dreamed about this for years, give it to me.” His slow words juxtaposed the fervent pace of his fingers and it was enough to send you over the edge.

You feel so hot you fear you might pass out, the groan Makki lets out beneath you is the only thing keeping you grounded. You were first concerned that you had hurt him in someway, but when you see his eyes roll back into his head and his tongue trying to lap up every single bit of cum you squirted on his face and thighs, you know it wasn’t due to excruciating pain, rather it's just an obscene reaction to you.

When you push him back, squirming with overstimulation, you hear him scramble and “Shit! Fuck! Fire extinguisher?? WHERE IS YOUR FIRE EXTINGUISHER???” You are still out of it until he starts actually screaming, words still evade you but he follows your line of sight to the red tube hiding in the corner next to the fridge. The smell of smoke is overwhelming all of a sudden. You were in a dreamlike post orgasmic state and suddenly your coughing, eyes hazy.

the cookies, SHIT THE COOKIES!! Smoke is billowing out of the oven and your fire alarm is blaring, but soon the room is filled with a white foam originating from Makki. You never realized that the foam would continue to expand until half of your kitchen was covered in it and you saw a sheepish looking Makki on the other side.

“Fires out”. Again, he starts to laugh at you, and this time you join him. Today has turned out entirely different than you expected. It wasn’t a sad day, it was filled with laughter, romance, an ill timed fire and Makki. All in all, a successful holiday, despite the fact everything you cooked was coated in foam. He’d seen you staring at the food and already took his phone out to order food, “Indian or ramen?”

Yeah, you think you’re grandma would be happy seeing you like this. Happy Holidays.

a/n: i don’t really know what this is but the image of makki being a disaster in the kitchen came to me one day and here we are. make sure you read the other fics in the collab

matsukawa’s funeral home winter collab

a/n 2.0: also a/o to @iwaasfairy for making that makki image that i used in my header. i love her more than i love him which say a lot

#hanamaki takahiro #hanamaki drabble #hanamaki x y/n #hanamaki smut #haikyuu smut #makki smut #makki x reader #makki x you #hanamaki x reader #hanamaki.coffee #kristen.writes #oral.espresso

[who-ever-said-i-was-nice]

Yeyyy I'm glad i found you ehe xD and stalked you so i can found many

interesting HCs xD #sorrryyyyy

May i request for HC ikevamp about MC forget her period schedule and accidentally stain his bf's bed (arthur, moz, isaac, theo, whoever u like xD)

Thank you so muchhhhh and nice to meet youuu 💞💞💞💞

Oh my God! Nice to meet you too @liviavivi04!❤️❤️❤️ Btw Livia, dear I don’t mind, you don’t have to apologize for stalking me😂😂😂.I do it to. What who said that. Also I’m sooooo happy you like my hcs. I put mah hear and mah soul into it. Yes that was a meme reference, I’m a dork. Moving on, this is not what I’m here to do. I’m here to provide you with some wholesome Theo, Arthur, Isaac, Mozart, Jean because he deserves love, Comte because he’s a good mother and Leo because he’s dead inside content. I can’t do more at the moment but maybe I’ll do a part two if you’s like and this turns out ok

Theo

it was a wonderful morning

SIKE

you woke up and you turned sleepily towards each other

he smiled at you mumbling a good morning

you smiled back, but then you felt something

Theo saw the color draining from your face

you jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom

Theo was like the F is wrong with you you stupid Hondjie( he didn’t actually say it but his face says it all)

I’m kidding he would never say that he loves you to much he was just surprised until he smelled IT

he looked at the spot you where a second ago and..

there was a spot of blood there

he doesn’t mind one bit

You rush back and you see the stain and immediately start apologizing

“ Why are you apologizing for something like this?” It’s not like you wanted to stain the bed”

He actually helps you clean it up even thought you insist that he doesn’t have to and he also gets you snacks

Thank you for your services Theo

Arthur

he knows

that’s it that’s the canon

no I’m kidding

but he does know

he wakes up and smiles at you

then his smile fades and turns into confusion as he sniffs the air a little

“ Luv...?”

you immediately look down and panic

you rush to the bathroom

Arthur just sits there with a small smile on his face you little

he gets up and asks if you need anything and if he can come in to get a wet rag ok i take it back

you let him in and he gets the rag and cleans the stain

you exit the bathroom looking very distraught, only to find... nothing

not stain and no Arthur

you break down crying

a few minutes later Arthur is back with snacks and is like girl why u crying?

you cuddle and he feeds you the snacks

THAT’S MY BOO

Isaac

homeboy is just super confused

he can smell it but he doesn’t know how to tell you

or should he tell you? What if he sounds like a creep? What if you freak out? What if you break up with him? and the worst what if you yell at him

yup

he’s torn

actually he’s thinking about it so hard that you ask him what’s going on

but then you realize to and you look down and see the stain and panic

now we all know Isaac is a little sensitive to blood

not in a he will faint kind of way more like a I-will-pounce-on-you-and-suck-your-blood-out-and-most-probably-do-you kind of way ya know

but no it’s a canon that vampires don’t find period blood tempting at all so that is not why you panicked

you did so because he’s a little shy and socially awkward

when I say a little I actually mean a lot I’m just being nice

sorta

anyway you ran to the bathroom and Isaac sat there like well snap

he got up and slowly walked to the door and knocked

“ H-h-hey Y/N are you alright?”

you reassure him everything’s fine

you come out of the bathroom clean the stain and look at Isaac who may or may not be standing in the corner

yes he is that is definitely the case

you ask him what’s wrong and he says that if he had told you maybe you wouldn’t have freaked out

sweet baby boy is blaming himself

you kiss him gently and explain to him that it is ok, it was not his fault and you guys cuddle for like 1,2,3,4 fine fine 8 hours

yeah you cuddle all day, that was just a mediocre joke sorry

Mozart

ok so, clean freak

 you woke up after a long night of uhhh stuff

I’m kidding nothing happened, I make stupid jokes like this cause I’ve never written smut. In conclusion: I’m nasty

 so yeah

you woke up and turned to your boyfriend

Wolf swept a stray lock from your face and placed it behind you ear

you smiled and he smiled back

and then you felt it

you jumped out of bed and ran for the bathroom

you went so fast and it was so unpredictable that you scared Mozart

like he jumped back in surprise

then he became a little confused like why did you leave? did he do something?

then something cathes his eye

a fresh blood stain on his perfectly white sheets

He’s quickly realized what happened and got out of bed

you came out of the bathroom only to find Mozart bent over the bed cleaning up the stain

“Wolf what are you doing?” “ Cleaning the stain are you blind” “ Yes , I mean no, but why, I can clean it” “ You sit down” “ Where did you get the rag from” “ I always have them on hand so if a particular forgetful girl stains the bed I can clean it up” “ I love you too”

Jean

poor boy has no idea what’s going on

so when you jump out of the bed and run to the bathroom and he sees a blood stain on the bed sheet he is shooketh

He gets up quickly and runs into the bathroom

“ Y/n are you alright?” “ Jean WHAT THE HECK I’M FINE AND I’M ALSO ON THE TOILET”

you shoo him out of the bathroom and you do your thing in there bla bla bla

you come out and explain to Jean very slowly what’s going on

he nods and points to the blood stain

“ So that’s your period blood”

you turn red and mumble out a bunch of thing and all of a sudden this guy says

“ Thank God I thought you where dying”

you raise your eyebrows and burst out laughing

he just stares at you ‘cause he was trying to be serious so like why are you laughing

he helps you clean up and you cuddle

Comte

he knows nr.2

he’s a pure blood so he can smell things better then the rest of the vampires

he’s also more educated in these things then the rest of the vampires

accept Arthur but he a little ho so it don’t count

anywoo so you woke up next to your boyfriend

Comte smiled at you and swept a lock of hair out of your face

“ Good morning ma chéri” “ Mornin’ ” you mumbled sleepily

but then all of a sudden

“OH sHIT” you bolt to the bathroom

Comte takes one stiff and is like yeah

however he is the gentlest gentleman out of all the gentlemen yes well done Lia

he gets up and asks if you need anything

when you say your fine he cleans the patch of blood and gets you snacks

you exit the bathroom and have no idea what the heck just happened because there is no stain, you have extra fluffy pillows, extra blankets, snacks, a hot water bottle and Comte the most important one of all🥰🥰🥰

“Y/N you don’t have to work today I have informed Sebastian that you will be taking a day off”

Damn Comte you went all out but like, doesn’t he always 

Leonardo da hot mess

what? yes I called him a hot mess and yes I made a joke about it

Damn I’m funny

Anyway Leonardo

he knows nr.3

so you woke up in Leo’s arms

“ Good morning Cara mia!’he smiled brightly and stroked your hair

“Wow that’s some bed hair” you playfully slapped his arm and giggled

and at that moment you felt it 

you pulled up the covers in a panic and saw the blood you shoved the blankets onto Leo’s head and rushed to the bathroom

“ Ow Cara what’s..oh”

yeah he smelled it before he saw it

but he’s a super chill guy

he gets up and knocks on the bathroom door

“You alright in there” when he hears a muffled yes he nods his head a small smile playing on his lips

he goes and gets a few extra pillows and blankets from the closet

when you exit the bathroom he’s standing in the middle of his messy room completely hidden by the bundle of blankets in his hand

“ Oh hello Cara mia!”

you burst out laughing

you to cuddled for the rest of the day

So that is it! Now that I think about it they should make a horror movie out of this like I’m not even kidding. Anyway hope you have an awesome day! Stay safe everyone!

Tags: @nad-zeta @jeanstan @sweettangy

#Ikemen Vampire #IkeVamp #ikemen vampire mozart #ikemen vampire leonardo #ikemen vampire isaac #ikemen vampire comte #ikemen vampire arthur #ikemen vampire jean #ikemen vampire theo

[mst3kproject]

The Neanderthal Man

Since I'm taking a break from fishmen, I might as well let Bigfoot catch up a bit.  The Neanderthal Man isn't exactly a Bigfoot movie, but it’s along the same lines and its entire starring cast has MST3K pedigrees.  Robert Shayne was in Indestructible Man and Teenage Caveman. Richard Crane was Rocky Jones, Space Ranger! Beverly Garland was in Swamp Diamonds and Gunslinger. Even the composer, Albert Glasser, wrote music for Invasion USA, Last of the Wild Horses, and almost all of MST3K’s Bert I. Gordon movies.

Some little mountain town in the middle of the Sierras (which the Portentous 50's Narrator takes some trouble to tell us is a primeval place where 'the defacing hand of civilization has fallen but lightly') is having a rash of saber-toothed tiger sightings!  At first these are laughed off, but when the game warden himself sees one cross the road in the middle of the night, it's time to do something about it.  The warden shows a cast pawprint to Dr. Ross Harkness in Los Angeles, who is interested enough to come up and see for himself. Local Mad Scientist Dr. Groves pooh-poohs the whole thing, which is enough to tell me that we're not dealing with a local cryptid here.  Somebody is making prehistoric monsters.

So... I may not have actually run out of movies, but I seem to be running out of plots, because this is a remarkably similar movie to Monster on the Campus. The major difference between the two films is that Dr. Blake turned himself into a caveman by accident, while Dr. Groves here is doing it on purpose.

Another difference is that Monster on the Campus' story, while silly, was linear – events escalated in a way that felt logical, and there were reasons why things happened when and where they did.  By contrast, The Neanderthal Man feels like a first draft.  At the beginning of the film, we're dealing with the saber-toothed tigers that Groves has been creating by injecting cats with his de-evolution serum.  We hear about these slaughtering game and livestock, and it seems like only a matter of time before they move on to human beings.  The beginning of the film is quite upfront about the fact that Groves is responsible, too, as it is only mildly mysterious in its depiction of one of the creatures escaping his lab.

Sometimes the saber-tooths are represented by an actual tiger, usually filmed from behind or at a great distance so nobody has to put the prosthetic teeth on it.  They do have prosthetic teeth, but they're only visible in a couple of shots. Imagine being at a bar and some guy tells you his job is sticking fake fangs on real tigers for a caveman movie!  For close-ups, there's a hilarious puppet head that looks like the sort of thing you'd see mounted on a frat house wall as a joke.  The director had the sense not to linger on this in motion shots, but later we see still photographs Groves has supposedly taken of his experimental subjects and they're even stupider-looking than we imagined.

Anyway, this goes on for a while with rising action, as the game warden goes to get Harkness and they manage to shoot one of the animals, only to have it vanish from the kill site when they try to show it to Groves (the movie never bothers to explain how that happened, incidentally. The ending suggests that the creatures change back when they die, but there's definitely no dead kitty cat at the scene, either).  The whole movie could easily have just had the cats and their creator as the antagonists, perhaps even ending the same way as Dr. Groves proves his work to the other characters by injecting himself. That's not what happens, though.  Instead, the story mostly forgets about the cats one we find out Groves has also been carrying on human experiments.

(Before himself, Groves' first experimental subject was his disabled Latina housekeeper.  Another series of photos show her half-transformed into a cavewoman who for some reason is wearing drag queen false eyelashes.  And as long as I'm talking about the movie being gross and bigoted, there's a bit where a woman is violently raped.  This happens off camera, but the audience is not allowed to entertain any illusions about it.)

The problem is that before we see him give himself an injection in the arm, we have had absolutely no indication that Groves has been giving his serum to anything besides the cats! Cats are stealthy, cryptic creatures and if one of those has been seen wandering around killing things, then surely a full-on caveman beating people to death would not be able to stay out of sight!  If what we were seeing were the first time Groves had tried the formula on himself then that would be an explanation, but his notes reveal that he's been doing it for so long that he's on the verge of losing control of the transformation and permanently reverting to a pre-human status, as indeed he does for the climax.  Much like the stupid dinosaur in The Beast of Hollow Mountain, the movie's main monster is given no build-up whatsoever!

There's worse yet, though.  The main characters, Dr. Harkness and Groves' daughter Jan, are barely involved in the 'caveman' part of the plot. They get phone calls about the various murders that Groves is committing in caveman form, and they snoop around the lab to figure out things the audience already knows.  The same story could have been told without them, perhaps with the game warden and the hunter as protagonists, and it would probably have been more interesting. The script also repeatedly has Dr. Groves wander in and bluster about how the tiger sightings are hallucinations and tall tales, which seems a little unnecessary when we already know he's responsible. The film-makers can't seem to decide whether they want us to know that or not.

Dr. Groves wears glasses.  Maybe the reason his primitive alter-ego is angry and breaking shit (although it does politely open and close the window it climbs out of, which made me laugh) is because it can't see. This is also my theory about why the Hulk smashes, and what do you know?  In Avengers Endgame he's got Hulk-sized spectacles and only smashes when he's told!

The direction of The Neanderthal Man can probably best be described as 'serviceable'.  It shows us what's going on, but doesn't particularly add anything to the proceedings.  The 'Neanderthal' mask is immobile and uninteresting, not much better than somebody's Party City Sasquatch costume.  Even the eyes are just painted on, meaning the poor guy in the costume can’t do much because he can’t see where he’s going.

The dialogue is often very strange, with characters talking like they're in a Jules Verne novel. If only one person did this, it might seem like a character quirk – it works for Dr. Groves, for example – but it's everybody. Seeing the cat carcass is gone, Harkness declares, “I refuse to believe in the supernatural!  There must be some logical cause and effect to this unholy adventure!”  Groves' fiancee Ruth berates him for ignoring her, saying, “I want you, the man I once knew!  The good companion, the cheerful friend.  I want the happiness we once found in each other.”  It's bizarre to listen to, and often audibly awkward for the actors.

Monster on the Campus was kind of trying to be about how humanity must choose to evolve away from our inner savage, although the finale didn't bear that out.  There's a scene in The Neanderthal Man in which this movie seems to be trying to go in the opposite direction, saying that we were never savage to begin with.  Dr. Groves is speaking to a panel of scientists about the size of the brain in various 'primitive' species of human.  He points out that by the time we reached Homo erectus we were already working with four times the cerebral jelly of a chimpanzee, and argues that our ancestors would have been recognizably human in their behaviour and problem-solving capacity.

(Amusingly, his chart of human evolution includes Piltdown Man, which was proven to be a hoax literally a few months after this movie's release.  What makes this even more tragic for the writers is that their list of primitive humans seems to be the only place where they actually did any research.)

The problem with Dr. Groves' theory is that he already knows it's wrong. We soon learn that he's been experimenting on himself with his serum for a while already, and his notes show that he knows very well he regresses into a near-mindless animal.  The movie does not even try to reconcile these ideas.  If Groves were continuing his experiments in the hope that perfecting his serum would give him a more accurate reconstruction of ancient man, that would be one thing, but the script never goes there.

So now that we've had two 'man turns into caveman by injecting science juice' movies, of course I have to ask which one is better.  Monster on the Campus wasn't a good movie but it was definitely an improvement on The Neanderthal Man in several respects, and although I don't have any way to find out for certain, I suspect it was an intentional remake.  It's definitely more entertaining and gets bonus points for including the Meganeura dragonfly, but nothing in it is nearly as funny as The Neanderthal Man's fake tiger head.  I guess if you're gonna watch one or the other, stick to Monster on the Campus, but if you're gonna watch both, start with The Neanderthal Man and do them in chronological order, the better to spot the inspirations and references.

Before I go, a fun paleontology fact: current thinking is that the saber-toothed cat's eponymous fangs actually didn't show when it had its mouth closed!  There are zero cave paintings or ancient sculptures of a saber-tooth cat with teeth visible, and when scientists looked at the structure of the enamel in the canines, it suggested that in life the teeth were hidden by big, fleshy, St Bernard jowls.  Google 'smilodon lips' and behold how this looks fully three hundred percent more ridiculous than you're imagining.  I love nature.

#mst3k #reviews #episodes that never were #the neanderthal man #tw: rape #50s #curiously caucasian cavepeople

[elftwink]

i have now seen the new cinderella movie twice and it’s so weird. first of all it’s probably because i’d only ever heard about the movie via tiktoks making fun of it and not seen any ads but i didn’t know it was a jukebox musical and it took me like three songs to figure it out but like... all the song choices are so bizarre? most of them just barely apply to the scene so it feels more like an interruption than a natural progression. it also feels like they made 0 attempt to match singers up to a style that they’re used to and sound good in which is partly i think why the vocals are getting torn apart so bad.

i mean like. okay sorry this is going to be very self important ex theatre kid of me to say but if you listen to camila cabello in million to one (a song they WROTE!! for this movie!!![i think]) it sounds like she’s trying to belt using her head voice and so it sounds so strained and not in like an ‘overpowering emotion’ strained but like she can literally barely get the notes out. and like hey. why did you make her sing that then. why is it so bad when you wrote it for a person who already has a successful career singing for a musical that isn’t even live like you can edit the audio and process it and do several takes if one doesn’t sound the best.

and the reprise is so bad because it has all the same problems but it’s in that part of the plot right after the stepmother ruins her dress and before the fairy godmother arrives and she’s like crying and it’s very sad and then the energy of the scene completely changes for her to do another uplifting verse of million to one and it’s like WHY ARE YOU MAKING HER SING THIS LIKE THAT. and the lyrics are adding NOTHING!!! to the story!! it’s just the chorus so it’s nothing new and it feels almost unrelated to ella’s emotional state. and bc of that the only thing you can focus on is the vocals!! and how they’re very clearly not her best work!!

it feels like this movie was written by someone who has seen a musical but not really understood it at all. the songs come in abruptly, and it’s very poorly communicated when characters can hear each other. while they generally fit the vibe of the scene that’s... all they do. like in a musical the lyrics of the song are dialogue. they’re part of the story; if you remove them you leave holes in the story because major plot beats should be happening there. in cinderella (2021), songs are just kind of about the scenes, if that. the plot sort of happens around them, to the point where it’s sometimes annoying when they start singing bc it’s a 3 minute pause on anything you actually wanna see. this is the musical people are talking about when they’re telling you why they hate musicals and don’t find them believable.

ONE good section song wise was seven nation army which is annoying bc it’s prefaced by whatta man which.... has just an awful instrumental arrangement like stop leaving these singers out to dry. but like anyway this happens when the prince first comes to the ball and the various women come to try out to be princess sing whatta man and then they transition into a rendition of seven nation army by the prince which... in this context works! it comes off as melodrama from the prince and offers a different interpretation of the song that i think is actually really funny. it has personality, it fits with the story, which makes it so weird that most of the other songs do not. like i could put together a better track list for this movie i think.

and that all sucks because in between the songs, the movie is actually like... pretty good. like not great; it’s very... direct with its #girlpower plotline in a sort of tell-not-show way, so some lines of dialogue feel like the writers thought you might be too stupid to pick up on the fact that ella wants independence and [financial] freedom but misogyny is a major barrier in her way even though that’s the whole point. BUT the plot itself is actually a kind of fun twist on cinderella, if not 100% untrodden ground. the characters all have motivations and goals that make sense. the stepsisters and stepmother are great; i think sometimes cinderella retellings make the stepfamily very cartoonish and flat, but i think they feel like real people (i mean, a little silly, but that’s in keeping with the tone of the movie; and it means the stepsisters make for decent comic relief without ruining the tension between ella and the stepmother). most of the jokes landed! if there were 0 songs this would be a fairly decent family movie with a kind of wildcard cast. but instead it’s This. wow.

(also it’s really unclear whether the problem is interpersonal misogyny or systemic misogyny, and the movie seems to purposefully conflate the two. the prince points out that women are not allowed to run businesses, and refers to purchasing ella’s dress as doing his part to correct a flawed system. women have a prescribed role in royal courts that would require ella to give up her work. the stepmother’s entire motivation behind trying to get the [step]daughters to marry rich is that women only have social mobility through marriage to men; men who control their lives and can on a whim destroy them. but then also you simply just have to believe in yourself and not let anybody tell you what to think about yourself and it will all work out! like hello?? what are the laws in this kingdom. maybe i’m too leftist for this movie. i don’t know what i expected from an amazon original.)

disclaimer i’m not a singer or a musical expert and i don’t know what i’m fucking talking about i have no qualifications i was a drama kid over 5 years ago and that’s all. i just love to be a bitch. xoxo

anyway. 4/10.

#good idea generator #under a cut because i had a lot to say about cinderella (2021) apparently #spoilers ig if you care about that? what was this movie

[djarinsidebitch]

omg requests are open!!! can i get something about meeting the family, with Sam Wilson??

I am so happy that I got some sam requests- I love this man more than life itself. I wasn’t sure what family you were referring to so I went with Sam to meet your family. If this isn't what you wanted please let me know and I can fix it!!

Not beta’d we die like men here

Word count: 1.4k

“Shouldn’t I be the one nervous baby bird” Sam jokes reaching over to put a hand on your leg that has been bouncing the entire drive from the compound to your family’s home.

“ha ha very funny Sam” you quip back then sigh “ I don’t know- i haven’t seen them in years and I am just scared- what if they freak out or its another round of ‘look at your sister she has a safe and stable job why do you have to be out there fighting'' You ramble nervously and Sam looks at you with the definition of heart eyes wrapping his sturdy arms around you pulling you into a hug- abet and uncomfortable one because of the center console but it calms you down. Sam seemed to have that effect, whenever you were stressed or upset just being around him calmed you and vice versa if he had a bad mission you would be there to comfort him

“You will be fine, and if they start that we will just leave and go see a movie or dismantle the patriarchy, we have time to decide” he pulls back and turns the car off looking over to you once more, “You can do this- you are a badass avenger, and my badass fiance “ he brings your hand up to his lips giving a soft kiss upon them. You nod a sense of false confidence filling you and the two of you get out of the car. Sam meets out halfway around the front of the car putting an arm around your shoulders as the two of you look ahead at the front of your family’s home, it wasn’t the one you grew up in but the one they moved into after you graduated from the shield academy and was place in the triskelion to be nearby.

Standing at the door you took one more deep breath before knocking on the door. It was only a few seconds before the door opened to show your father he was a kind man with eyes that just radiated warmth and they widened when he realized it was you, he said your nickname with a happy chuckle bringing you into a hug

“My baby” he murmurs and you smile pulling away moving to introduce Sam

“Pa’ this is Sam-My fiance; Sam this is my Dad” You introduce the two and Sam holds out his hand but your dad just sighs and pulls him into a hug “I am a hugger Sam” this makes Sam laugh and pat your dad on the back  before pulling away. Your father invited the two of you in and everyone had already shown up. It wasn't any holiday but your mother had decided she hadn’t seen all of her children in a long time so she set up this dinner. It was nice to see everyone you hadn’t seen your younger sister or brother in years; your sister was married and just had a little boy while your brother’s wife was expecting.

Sam intertwined his hand with yours as they walk into the living room where everyone except you mother, who was in the kitchen, Once they noticed you were here both of your siblings stood up to give you a hug you returned the hug and pulled back to allow Sam to introduce himself but we was quickly cut off by your nerd of a brother going “You’re the Falcon'' in a giddy voice excited to meet one of his favorite avengers. You rolled your eyes as Sam laughed “Yeah man, what are you a fan” he jokes but your brother just nods and starts asking him a bunch of nerdy questions while your sister pulls you over to the couch where her husband and newborn was.

“So, About your no dating coworkers policy” She rides and makes you roll your eyes

“That is different-”

“How so-”

“Because he’s-”

“Crazy stupid hot-” That earned a slap on the arm from you and a look of amusement from your sisters husband  “What- I’m not wrong.”

“No you are not- but that isn’t the reason,” You look over to where Sam stood gladly dealing with your younger brother's questions about his suit and falcon duties. He looked perfect the jacket he wore stretched over her arms that where calmly crossed over his chest making a few jokes that made your brother laugh “Well one I met him before we were coworkers, and he wouldn’t let me say no when he asked me out” you joked and finally your mother left the kitchen to let everyone know that food was ready, you and your mother had an ‘interesting’ relationship. She wasn’t fond of you agreeing to go to the shield specialist academy she said it was because she wanted you safe but you knew it was because she didn't think you had the grit to survive it- but you did and even after that she always doubted you; your skills, your decisions, she was the reason you were so nervous no matter how good you where it was never enough. 

Sitting around the table you sat next to Sam and made easy conversation with everyone chuckling about some joke that Sam made about a mission the two of you and Bucky went on while feeling your mothers eyes glaring into the side of your head, she cleared her throat bringing attention to herself 

“So when were you going to tell us about you boyfriend” she says snidely in the tone that made you want to punch something, you clench your jaw looking over at her 

“Fiance” you correct your thumb subconsciously coming up to run across the engagement ring that sat on your left ring finger, “-and that was the reason we came but you were doing something when we arrived and i didn’t want to bother you” you say back with a sickly sweet tone sam quirked an eyebrow up he knew that you had talked about your mom being difficult but he did not expect that right off the bat.

Your mother only hummed disapprovingly taking a sip of her drink then sighed “I don’t know what i expected from you- You probably weren’t going to tell us until after the wedding. It's like you don’t even want to be a part of the family- at least if I just said I only had one daughter then I would stop having to be embarrassed.” Everyone looked over at your mother's eyes wide.

That one hurt, you were used to her complaints but that one actually hurt, you know you missed birthdays and events but you were either on missions or celebrating with the rest of the avengers but you tried you really did. before you could say anything sam stands up for you “Hold the phone- you think that your daughter is an embarrassment, the same daughter that puts her life on the line day in and day out to keep you and everyone else safe, if this is how she is treated every time no wonder she doesn’t want to come back  here I have only know your daughter for a few years but it seems i know her more than you do, Now we are going back to Our family” he stands grabbing onto your hand “We’ll send you the rsvp for the wedding” he says simply walking out with your hands still intertwined. He smirks at the astonished look on your mother’s face and the large smiles on your siblings faces.

Walking down to the car you looked lovingly up at Sam, “Thank you Sam-” 

He looks over to you, moving to pull you into another hug “No one can say anything bad about my little bird without me protecting her,” he says with a smile. 

The two of you get to the car and when you shut the door you look over at him as he says “I know what we should do-”

“What is that-” you say intrigued, clipping your seat belt in.

“Dismantle the patriarchy and get ice Cream” he says with a suave tone and you smile leaning over the console again placing a soft kiss on his lips pulling back to softly say against his lips “I think that is an amazing idea love” 

“Of course it is, I thought of it” he smirks “I love you” he replies kissing you once more

“I Love you too Mr. Wilson” 

“Oh don’t i know it future Mrs. Wilson” He smirks pulling the car away from where it was parked resting a hand on your thigh as you two drive away.

#sam wilson x reader #falcon x reader #sam wilson x you #falcon x you #marvel x reader #requests #marvel x you #sam wilson fanfiction #falcon fanfiction #marvel fanfiction