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stupidlovergirl · 11 months

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Human TV I Think They'd Watch

All the Bros and Dateables

Dev Notes:I have been watching Kitchen Nightmares while writing and how I think Barbatos might like it,, and then it lead to what human world TV they might like,,, maybe spent a little to much time on it instead of working on WIPs

Lucifer

Really likes old people TV

He watches things like How It’s Made, National Geographic documentaries, if he wants a little laugh those shows about “aliens”. Skin Walker Ranch is his dirty little side piece TV show

He just enjoys educational shows because they are easy to tune out

Really loves Soap Operas. Young and the Restless and General Hospital are kept up with religiously(hah). He, Diavolo, and Barbatos usually watch it. Dia really likes it and Barbatos watches when working with Dia second hand while doing work. He latched on after watching it in the background a few times.

Also, just the news. Mans will put on a 24 hour news station and will keep it on for like, 5 days.

Mammon

He watches Harrison Porter, so give him the joy that is Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit.

Would also enjoy the Spiderwick Chronicles movie since he doesn’t know how bad it was compared to the books

Just a big fantasy fan honestly. Loves them.

On another note, he also loves trashy reality TV and News. The only one who beats out his love for celebrity gossip is Asmo. When he is putting on a TV show to go brain dead to its something from TLC, like 90 Day Fiance, I Love a Mama’s Boy, etc.

He watches the Kentucky Derby, bets on it a lot (loses a lot too)

His dirty secret show/movies are Hallmark movies. He watches them when he won’t get caught. Hopeless romantic nerd (Affectionate)

Leviathan

You’re joking

You’re joking right?

Anime or DIE!!! (/hj)

Also really popular fantasy movies based on books. He will rip them to shreds when you watch them. Can be fun if you read the books, annoying if you haven’t.

Has a soft spot for magical girl animes, obvi

There isn’t really much to elaborate on, half of his personality is anime and nerd stuff.

Just a few favorites I think he might have with no explanation:

Tokyo Mew Mew, Yugi-Oh, Death Note, Naruto, Angel Beats, Lucky Star, Soul Eater, Watamote, Saint Tail, and Cowboy Bebop

Satan

King of detective shows

He loves trying to find them out

It is canon he loves the Devildom equivalent of Midsomer Murders, so just show him that too

I think he would like Forensic Files too.

Also, thriller movies. And psychological horror movies.

He loves them, he typically can predict an ending, but it's nice to see how they write out how the characters themselves find out

Asmo

Trashy reality TV!!!!!

He and Mammon watch 90 Day and Mama's boy and talk shit about them.

Loves Maury, Jerry Springer (rip my king), Parent Court when he's feeling a little frisky

Next Top Model and RuPaul's Drag Race. It's about the DRAMA! The OUTFITS!

Watched part of Euphoria but honestly? Found it mid. Sorry but he just couldn't understand the hype after the writing started to plummet.

Has watched Jersey Shore, will not elaborate on his opinion.

Tbh, he also doesn't really watch much because he feels like he has better things to do with his time, he only watches it for Brotherly Bonding, and for background noise

Beel

Haha, big guy hardly watches TV

Watches workout videos primarily

He likes learning new work out and dietary things

Has been banned from watching any type of food shows. Sorry Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives.

Will participate in movie night, primarily for food, buhe does pay attention

Honestly just watches whatever someone else typically puts on with no complaint

Belphie

Much like his twin, doesn't typically seek out TV watching.

Much easier to watch on his phone

He does enjoy satisfying videos

Watches Rug cleaning videos, silly ASMR videos, Video essays when he can't sleep and gets curious. Loves obscure media and icebergs.

The essays are about the only thing that goes on the TV

Sorry but he just doesn't care much.

Will also participate in movie night, almost always falls asleep. Still can tell you the entire plot of the film.

On a very rare occasion will watch South Park. Will not elaborate on this one.

Solomon

Loves old TV shows to some newer ones

I Love Lucy, The Twilight Zone, The Muppet Show

I cant really explain the Muppet Show, but I know its true, it is in my bones

Honestly loves older sitcoms. They just hit different.

Can I mention I Dreamed a Genie and Bewitched? Classics in his eyes. Would fight to the death for them

Will make a off hand comment on how he doesn't feel like TV is the same anymore

Watches reality TV in the background when Asmo turns it on when he lounges in either one of their rooms

I feel like I just can't explain most of these, but they are the truth in my heart and that is enough

Simeon

Haha...What?

Watches whatever Luke or Solomon puts on or whatever someone else would suggest

He has a preference for books most of the time I feel like. Just goes with the flow

Just suggest something and he'll put it up for the next movie night when it's his choice

I really can't think of one he would pick oops.

Barbatos

He watches whatever Diavolo puts on in the background. Likes the Soap Operas some times, gets a little annoyed with anime voices when he has a migraine.

Kitchen Nightmares and Hell's Kitchen just hits right for him. Loves the insults

He doesn't much watch TV either though. Prefers audio books since they are easier to carry around

You essentially have to beg to watch TV with him, he's a busy butler ya'know?

Diavolo

KING OF FLEXIBILITY

Has watched all of it, and will continue to do so.

Has a special place for Soap Operas and Ruri-Chan

Seen all the classics, the new block busters, all of it

Honestly you wonder how he gets the time?

He really likes consuming stuff, so he does it when he is working on paper work he puts on the subtitles and turning the audio on low and going HAM

Couldn't be me, I would get distracted

For the most part he's watched it all, and what he hasn't is on his to watch list. He just likes talking to his friends about it :)

Luke

GREAT! BRITISH! BAKE! OFF!

He likes seeing the different foods

It inspires him so much, it's so cute watching his eyes sparkle as he sees something he likes and he writes it down on his phone

Also, he really likes watching Bluey. He lets Simeon and Solomon, and Barbatos found out (because he knows everything), but would DIE if anyone else found out

Also likes early 80's and bad CG horror movies. Kid literally laughs and Mammon is losing his mind next to him. I think because of the bad effects it makes it more tolerable.

Killer Klowns from Outer Space slaps man what can the kid say?

I think I'm projecting hard onto him,, but he's my son so it doesn't matter

#obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #lucifer obey me #mammon obey me #leviathan obey me #satan obey me #beelzebub obey me #belphegor obey me #solomon obey me #simeon obey me #barbatos obey me #diavolo obey me #luke obey me

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doppel-doodles · 6 months

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What is Shui's opinion on a certain "Albino Witch" wandering in the mortal realm? xD (Aka: Yeva shdhsjjd-)

Also, do they have any hobbies? :0

Ayayayaya you are tickling my writers brain I see-

Let’s say in this scenario Shui and Yeva probably met via Redson dragging her along to his lessons with Arthur because uh yeah he is kinda his teacher-

And in that case congrats she is now part of the family and no rejecting this is not an option.

Of course a friend of redson is a friend of hers! But for Yeva specifically I can see Shui would probably mother hen after her a lot, I feel like her more quiet nature and lack of emotion remind her a lot of one of her own daughters.

And a bonus for if she would have known her in her younger years, while Shui was a lot less terrifying than she was in her celestial warrior years she was still not the most approachable person however when Yeva decided to become her problem she would probably become the unpaid babysitter because „I guess I won’t let you die from stupidity.“ meant affectionately of course XD

She definitely would have made Yeva babysit her little brats once they came into the world as revenge :>

Well as for hobbies they all have something going on :0

But this is already way to long so have a quick list-

Shui: One of her favorite pastimes is researching marine biology and the underwater world in general, as an aquatic type demon it is pretty easy for her to just dive into a body of water and explore to her hearts content after all. On these trips she also looks for shiny knickknacks for her ever growing collection but besides that she also works out.

Arthur: Honestly if you were to just ask him then he would probably just answer "work." And to be fair almost blowing the roof of your house is a fun pass time but what he also likes doing is cooking which he is quite good at. Does adopting everything that breaths in your general direction also count as a hobby?-

Adrien: He's pretty into books but Adrien doesn't just like reading he also likes to write them himself. (definitely wrote a lot of fanfic in his teen years)

Klara: Oh she definitely is the type of kid that would do millions of activities and hobbies all the time and would leave nothing untouched, does everything from sports to researching physics for fun-

Katie: She likes to draw and dabbles in fashion design, really wants to learn how to actually make clothes, also a pretty big theater kid.

—

Jú: Dancing and singing were her main ones but she definitely doesn't do those a lot anymore, another one where the answer would just be "work." If asked. Volunteers at animal shelter's in her free time.

Băoshí: Also pretty big into working out but also likes to craft, everything from cute little bird houses to full on furniture if bro can make it himself then he won't buy it. He to has a collection of shiny things stashed somewhere and it's only growing. He does some gardening on the side.

Yúnlü: Her passion lies in music, she is on a mission to try and learn as many instruments as possible. Besides that I picture her to be really into video games, definitely gets way too competitive when playing Mario party.

—

Ming: I guess the closest thing he had to a hobby after his death was etching a line into his gravestone to keep track of the days, though eventually he couldn't even do that.

Baí: Sleeping, he doesn't need it anymore but it's a nice break from reality. Other than that he isn't exactly allowed to do anything that isn't serving or training.

—

Mengtao: Gardening is her main one, even if it is technically her duty she still enjoys it. Other than that she also likes to annoy Nezha and Lao tzu-

Amia: She likes to knit! Her webs make for surprisingly comfy sweaters. Amia is also into crappy romance novels as well as making candy and baked goods.

Wanna know who you can ask a question? Click here!

Of course Yeva belongs to @chuitu

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coconutcordiale · 2 years

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tailspin pt three (in another life, maybe we're meant to be)

pairing- jake 'hangman' seresin x female bartender!reader (no use of y/n)

synopsis-

“I deserve someone who wants me,” you add, when it’s clear he has no response.

“I want you,” he promises quickly, too quickly, in a way that tells you he doesn’t comprehend what those words actually mean.

warnings- 18+ only, explicit cheating (still not a he lied about being married fic), ooooo jealous possessive jake wants to break stuff, spanking, piv sex, dom!hangman and his dirty mouth, slight dumbification/degradation, begging, authority kink, praise kink probably, readers probably in subspace, lots of angst not promising happy endings still I'm too set on jake being toxic

length- 3.8k ish words

an- this is my favorite part, probably the only one I'm minorly proud of writing so don't know why I made it the third part but whatcha gonna do

Now.

Alex is probably one of your favorite regulars. He’s polite, he flirts, but not too much, and always tips well. It helps that he’s very, very easy on the eyes. You can tell he’s been working up the courage to ask you out for weeks, and you’ve been dreading it in a vague sort of way, mind still consumed with the mess you’ve made for yourself and a certain blonde pilot.

“No hard feelings,” he says after he slides his number over. “If you’re not interested. It would be nice to see you outside of here though."

Unfortunately for Alex, you’re just standing there counting all the ways he’s not Jake.

“You’ve been in a funk lately,” Penny muses after he leaves. “Give him a shot, will you?”

You don’t even have it in you to scold her for beating a dead horse.

Against your better judgment, and mostly because you’re out of excuses with Penny, you do agree to go out with Alex. You tell yourself it’ll just be drinks, low pressure. You figure you can take him to a sticky service industry-laden dive bar, he’ll get points if he doesn’t get scared off. Maybe you’ll even end up liking him, having a good time.

It’s a lie, but you can convince yourself. You have all afternoon.

•••

Eyes adjusting to the dim lighting of the bar, you immediately want to facepalm, wishing Coronado was bigger. You’d suggested a place that you’d never mentioned to Jake, one you didn’t think he’d know about. You didn’t want to chance running into him at your usual spots. Of course, what you didn’t count on, is that Jake is avoiding you too.

Should’ve gone to San Diego, you both think simultaneously.

Which is how you end up with Jake Seresin boring holes into the back of your head while you play pool with your date.

Alex doesn’t seem to recognize him, must be the lack of uniform. You thank your lucky stars for that, trying to ignore the heat rising in your core with Jake’s eyes fixed on you.

Jake’s eye is twitching.

Every nerve ending is unsettled, he wants to rip his hair out, or better yet, rip the hair from the scalp of that idiotic brunette you’re playing pool with. His hand is so tense around his beer he’s surprised it hasn’t shattered all over the bar.

At least if he did break the bottle you might look in his direction.

You are, decidedly, not looking anywhere near him, staring at the solids and stripes on the table so intensely one might think you had bet your life savings on this game. You’re chalking the cue, holding the little cube at the top and rolling the stick with your foot, making sure the blue chalk goes onto to the tip just so. Professional pool players don’t look this serious.

Somewhere in the back of his brain Jake recognizes his hypocrisy, that seeing you with another man makes his blood boil when he goes home to his wife at night. But that part is buried deep underneath memories of you laid out beneath him, soft skin flushed and dainty lips parted, mewling his name.

There’s always been something about you that puts cracks in his control, throws a wrench into his carefully calculated plans.

He sees Alex lean in to say something to you, brushing his hand across your arm, and Jake snaps his jaw shut so hard the bartender turns around with raised eyebrows.

Alex’s subconscious must know his fingers are milliseconds away from being broken because he makes his way to the back of the bar, ostensibly to find the bathroom.

Your laser focus of paying attention to anything except Jake means you don’t notice him sidling up to you until he’s caged you in, tan arms on either side trapping you against the green felted table.

“Tell him you don’t feel well,” you hear, low, the slight hint of his southern drawl raising goosebumps on your skin, your muscles aching to lean into the heat of his body.

Despite your body’s traitorous response to his presence, you manage to turn your head and glare at him, opening your mouth to give him a piece of your mind, something along the lines of who the fuck do you think you are?

He levels you with a hard look and the words die on your tongue.

“I’ll be in my truck,” he states, promptly walking out the door. He doesn’t look back, doesn’t have to. He knows you’ll follow.

You don’t even know what lie you tell Alex when he returns, excuses tumbling out of your mouth without your brain’s permission. Somehow convincing him you don’t need a ride home, you don’t live far, the walk and fresh air is bound to make you feel better.

Jake doesn’t turn when you get in his truck, driving the short distance to your apartment in silence, knuckles so tight around the steering wheel you’d only be minorly surprised if he snapped it in half. You don’t say anything, instead watching the tense lines of his body, his jaw flexing as anger thrums through him.

Your thighs clench together in anticipation, knowing how he gets when he’s mad. You can feel the slick pooling underneath your skirt, it’s been building since the moment you felt his predatory gaze on you.

Air inside thick with tension, the truck is barely in park when he reaches over to pull you across the bench seat into his lap, your skirt already riding up. You shiver as he drags his calloused hand underneath the thin material.

He groans against your lips as his fingers slide against the mess you’ve made of your panties.

“Did you get this wet for him? Got yourself all worked up, bending over the pool table in this little fucking skirt for everyone in the goddamn bar to see?”

His tone is harsh, just on this side of mean, and it awakens some primal need to please inside of you. You shake your head almost frantically, hips bucking against the hand on your clothed mound.

“Only because you were there,” you manage to pant, and you swear you hear his breath hitch at your admission.

“That’s what I thought,” he chuckles darkly.

He moves his hand from your hot center to settle on your ass and pull you down to him. Your mouth goes dry when you feel the hard line of him through his jeans, unable to stop yourself from rutting against him in his lap like a horny teenager.

Jake pulls your skirt all the way up now so he can slap your ass, all his strength behind it, and your fingers flex against his shoulders as you whimper at the sting. Blush rises on your cheeks and you try to tuck your face into his neck, embarrassed at how easy it is for him to chase away every intelligible thought you have left.

He’s not having it though, grabbing your hair and pulling your head back so you have no choice but to look at his blown pupils.

“Should put you over my leg and smack you till you’re red, for putting on that little show back there.”

You let out a lewd sound at the picture that conjures up in your mind, and he slaps you again before lifting you off of his jean-clad cock. He rips off your thong like its very existence offends him, thrusting two fingers into you without warning, no gentleness about it. You’d yelp in pain if you weren’t already so fucking wet.

Instead, you’re repeating his name like a prayer, hands roaming his shoulders, arms, whatever you can get a hold on. His skin is burning under your fingers and you pull yourself closer and closer, body vibrating with need.

He’s wasting no time, curling his fingers, thumb circling your clit like he’s on a mission. You can’t help but roll your hips on his hand, hands going to the nape of his neck and gripping his hair, pulling his mouth to yours.

You make a noise of extreme displeasure as he pulls his fingers out, leaving you empty, but still teasing your bundle of nerves with the pad of his thumb.

“Do you need something, darlin’?” He asks, fake sweetness dripping off his tongue.

“Please,” you whimper.

“Please, what?”

“Need you…” You’re full-on whining now, any traces of shame and humiliation having long been kicked to the curb.

Distantly, you can feel him smirking against your skin. “That’s awfully vague.”

You shake your head vigorously, like maybe that will clear the cloudiness out of your brain and make the words come to you.

He’s making slow circles on your clit that are clearly a ploy to drive you insane. “Come on, sweetheart, you can’t be this dumb already, haven’t even fucked you yet.”

You open your mouth to prove him wrong, you’re not dumb, you can tell him, you can.

But the words don’t come.

You’re lost in the sea of sensations, skin stretched too tight across your bones, ache in your center throbbing and relentless.

He pinches your swollen bundle of nerves and you jump, head lolling back in pleasure before the sting cuts through the fog.

“In me…please, your cock, please Jake, need you please…” you mumble, words coming out in a rush now that you’ve finally found a few of them.

He laughs and you feel tears pricking the back of your eyes, burning even as you shut them tight. “I’m not sure you deserve it, looked like you were trying to replace me tonight.”

It takes you a few seconds to register what he’s saying, to figure out why he’s talking so fucking much, why he won’t just give you what you need.

“Could never,” you say, words breathless, hoping that’s the right answer.

“Why’s that?”

Goddammit.

He knows the fucking answer, you know he does, he just wants to hear you say it, more than that, wants to watch heat rise on your cheeks as he makes you admit it.

You want to scream in frustration, fingers tightening on his shoulders in a way that must be painful, your hips rolling against him pointlessly of their own volition. You hate him right now, hate him for making you trudge through the cloudy mess inside your brain, hate having to come up with words to plead with him when you just want to feel.

The only thing you hate more than him in this very moment, is how much you love when he makes you beg for it.

“Let me hear it and I promise I’ll give you what you want,” he rumbles in your ear.

Your eyes are squeezed shut so hard they’re starting to hurt. You don’t know where the words come from, but your mouth forms them without asking you anyways. Deep down, you know this is the right answer.

“No one else can fuck me like you do,” you whisper.

His hand comes down on your ass again, a reminder.

“Sir,” you add, belatedly, mind focused on how your cunt clenches around nothing.

“That’s right, my sweet girl,” he grunts, finger on your clit rewarding you by picking up the pace.

“Please.” You’ll be in tears any moment now, skin so hot you must be flushed all the way down your chest. “Need you, please, Jake, plea—"

You’re too out of your mind to notice him unzipping his jeans, only snapping to attention when pulls himself out and teases his tip across your folds. Taps the head of his cock on your clit to make you keen. You try to move your hips down, desperate to feel him inside of you and he clucks a disapproving noise, grabbing your hips tightly with both hands to keep you in place. He runs his mouth across your collarbones, teeth biting and tongue following closely to soothe the marks he’s leaving. You’re squirming against his hold on you, a part of you knows it’s futile, but you can’t help it, too frantic to feel him.

Completely at his mercy, he finally pulls you down onto him, cock stretching you in a way his fingers can never prepare you for. Sweat beads along your hairline, ab muscles shaking as your cunt tries to adjust to him.

“Feels like you were fuckin’ made for me, doll,” he groans as you take him fully, quietly almost, the one glimmer of sweet Jake you’ve seen all night.

The only response your brain is currently capable of is a string of unintelligible noises that might’ve been semi-coherent words at some point way before.

That glimmer of sugar is gone in a flash as he manhandles you, picking you up and bringing you back down on his cock forcefully.

You’d think you might have the upper hand in this position, being on top, but instead you feel like a ragdoll, being bounced around on his lap. You feel the coil in you, winding tighter and tighter. Your mouth is still open, but you’re not even sure sound is coming out at this point, eyes completely glazed over.

He’s everywhere, cock deep inside you, comforting scent filling your nose, callouses dragging across your skin, mind chanting Jake Jake Jake Jake.

There’s nothing but him.

One hand takes hold of your hair, tugging your head back hard, to expose your neck to him as he leaves filthy, open-mouthed kisses along the underside of your jaw, down your neck. He gets to just the right spot and you whimper, a small pathetic sound, as your mind goes completely blank, not a thought for miles.

The blend of pleasure and pain is what sends you over, having found your voice again to scream his name as you spasm around his thick cock.

“You’re fucking mine,” he growls as you come. He’s holding you in place, thrusting up into you fervently, chasing his own release. His pace is erratic now, rhythm lost as he finally comes inside you and fills you the way you wish you didn’t love.

As soon as he pulls out his mouth is on yours, tongue pressing insistently in commanding reminder, fingering his cum back inside you as it drips down the inside of your thighs, like he owns you. You tuck your face back into his neck and whine contentedly, hips still rolling down onto his fingers despite how spent your cunt feels. Because it’s never enough, with Jake, you always want more, always ready to take more, plead more, beg more—anything for him.

Minutes, hours, or days later, you can’t really be sure, Jake smooths your skirt down, gently picking you up off his lap, readjusts his jeans before getting out of the truck and reaching to take you with him.

You stumble, because your legs no longer work. Your feet sting in protest against the gravel of the parking lot, sandals dangling from your fingertips instead of on your feet like they’re supposed to be.

You’re fucking mine, you’re fucking mine, you’re mine, you’re mine, you’re mine, you chant in your head as he all but carries you to your apartment.

Hands starting to shake, you want to rip at your chest, want to free up some space so you can breathe.

You’re fucking mine.

He’s not wrong, you are his. You still consider yourself his, after all of this.

That’s the problem, isn’t it? You’re his, but he’s never been yours.

The walls are closing in on you, panic setting, your only thought now to get away from him, from his stupid inviting cologne that feels like home even though it has no right to.

Once you have your front door open, Jake leans down to kiss you and you take his momentary closed eyes as an opportunity to push him, hard, away from you and your home, certain the element of surprise is the only reason he even moved an inch.

Your sandals are still in your right hand when you use the left to slam the apartment door in his face.

“Open the door,” Jake is calm, firm and commanding, using that voice makes you melt for him. The one you’d always end up on your knees for.

“No!” You shout, feeling a little like a petulant child but also a weird sense of satisfaction at the idea of making unflappable Hangman flinch. You never say no to him, you’ve never been able to before.

“Sweetheart, please. I’m sorry. Open the door,” he tries again, still calm, but softer now. His voice is honey on your senses, sweet and languid, and you have to pinch yourself to keep you in reality.

It reminds you that you hate how he never gets loud with you, no matter how many fights you pick with him, how much you prod and poke. You’re always at the mercy of your emotions with him, while he remains collected.

Makes you wonder if he ever gets mad at Katelyn, if he’s as uncharacteristically patient and calm with her too.

“Go away, Jake,” you lean your forehead against the door, resisting the urge to bang it on the entryway in frustration. You can hear him talking, but you’re not really listening. Eyes fixated on the grain of the wood, you vaguely wonder if your neighbors can hear him.

“Only after you tell me off for ruining your date,” you hear him say, far away like you’re underwater, trying to break the surface, to get to the air above.

You’re treading water in the ocean, keeping your head just on top, hoping for rescue.

And then you remember, you’re fucking mine.

And the tide pushes another wave your direction, crashing over you to sting your eyes and fill your lungs with saltwater again, oxygen caught in your throat.

Out of options and hoping it’ll help you breathe; you swing the door open. Everything rushes back into focus, Jake’s shoulders barely contained in that white t-shirt, dark jeans in a fight for their life over his thighs. Swollen lips and messy hair, because you ruined him in his truck only minutes before. You don’t want to know what you look like.

“Is this really who you are?”

He looks genuinely concerned at this. “Sweets, what are you talking about?”

“You held me as I cried in your arms,” you say, slower now but still breathing hard like you just finished swimming in a triathlon. “You know how I feel about you, know it was excruciating for me to end us.”

You watch him wince; this is the closest you’ve ever gotten to admitting you love him. It’s always hung heavy in the air between you, as if neither of you said it out loud it might go away.

“But here you are,” you continue, ignoring the anguish on his face. “Throwing a wrecking ball into my attempt to move on, too selfish to let anyone else have me. Am I some sort of sick game to you?”

“Of course not,” he answers immediately, but you’re barely listening.

“Who is this guy, that ruins my night and claims me as his when he has no fucking right to? Do I even know the real you?”

“Yes,” he answers desperately. “You’re only one who really knows me, you have to know that.”

He pauses, takes a deep breath. "I want to fix things."

“Don’t you think the fact you’re always turning to me before you go home to your wife is, in fact, an indication that there isn’t anything here to fix?”

He has no answer for that.

You want to crumble into pieces on the floor, but instead turn to sit on your couch with the door wide open, a clear invitation you wish you were strong enough not to extend.

Jake shuts the door behind him and sits on the opposite end of the couch. His twitching fingers tell you he’s dying to touch you, but he stays on his side, a small victory for your willpower.

“I can’t bear to have you halfway anymore,” you inform him, cold like you’re reporting the news instead of exposing your soul.

“I’m not going to blow up my daughter’s life by leaving her mother,” he responds curtly.

“So, this is the solution?” You can feel your temper rising, your skin starting to crawl, cracks already beginning to show in your cold façade.

He’s quieter now, staring at the couch, “I don’t want Callie to know anything’s wrong. She has a lot going on right now, with starting middle school. I—"

“You and Katelyn don't even sleep in the same bed, Seresin!” You’re shouting again. “I think she knows. She’s not an idiot.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose, taking a few breaths and trying to calm down, but your vision is tunneling, your limbs are starting to feel too big for your body.

“I’m not going to turn Callie’s life upside down while she’s in school,” he reiterates for what seems like the thousandth time.

This isn’t the first time he’s said this exact sentence, every time you hear it your heart swells with hope that means when she’s old enough he just might choose you.

Tonight though, you want to beat that hope down and bury it where you’ll never find it again.

“She’s put up with enough, me being gone for months at a time, us moving constantly,” he continues.

You deflate. This is the same thing you’ve heard time and time again, you put your head in your hands, tired of looking at him and his unfairly beautiful face.

“I’ve told you that since the beginning. I’ve never lied to you.”

You still can’t breathe, shame sitting on your chest like an elephant.

He’s right. You’ve always known that, even though you didn’t want to believe it.

“This has to stop,” you say finally, after several minutes of tense silence, pulling your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around them, hoping the pseudo-hug will give you comfort.

Jake opens and closes his mouth multiple times, he wants to argue, wants to convince you to change your mind, wants you to wait for him, but he knows logically he has no right to ask that of you.

“I deserve someone who wants me,” you add, when it’s clear he has no response.

“I want you,” he promises quickly, too quickly, in a way that tells you he doesn’t comprehend what those words actually mean.

You shake your head. “You need me. There’s a difference.”

In another life, maybe we’re meant to be.

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alasse-earfalas · 1 year

Text

"Why does this fandom have to create so much angst all the time? The games were fun, right? Let the boys be happy!"

While I generally, wholeheartedly agree with and love the, "maybe it was an adventure" viewpoint, I've been thinking recently about why, for example, so much of what I write is angst. The short answer is projection, but I wanted to dive deeper. Why these boys, specifically? Why not some other characters from some other fandom? Why would I take such happy bois from such happy games and angst them into oblivion?

It's fun to push buttons. To swing an imaginary sword. Play fighting against invisible foes is fun, because there's no real mortal danger involved. At the end of the day, The Legend of Zelda is a video game series. A video game series that wants to be fun, that wants to sell the joy of adventure, the accomplishment of saving the day and being the hero. And those are valid! I definitely think those are key aspects of their journeys and should be included in fanworks, featured even!

But... That's not the whole story. Pushing buttons from the comfort of your sofa is one thing. Actually, physically being there, experiencing the exertion and adrenaline and injuries of combat, the pressure of actual time relentlessly ticking by (no pausing, no saving and quitting the game, no infinite tries against difficult enemies) as the world slowly inches towards its doom... Those would be very real for the boys, who, in a sense, live in those worlds.

Remember Dead Hand? Redeads? Guardians? Some other boss or monster that gives you all the nightmares? Think about how terrifying they are when your life isn't on the line. When you can pause the game, turn off the console, get up and go do something else. Simulated fear and actual, life-threatening terror are very different. Your body and brain make darned sure to remember when your life is on the line and make very very sure that you don't ever want to try that again.

But the Links do.

They try, they fight, they soldier on. They don't give up and they don't give in. How many of us would do the same, were our lives actually on the line like theirs would be? How exhausted would we be? How many of us would end up breaking down, literally unable to continue the journey ahead of us? How much worse, more vivid and debilitating, would those nightmares be?

And yet, there is joy.

They smile, they laugh, they wonder at their surroundings. They offer a helping hand to those around them, kick back and relax with mini-games, and take time to explore their beautiful world. Their trials, though horrific, do not break them. Because that is what it means to have a Hero's Spirit in this world of LoZ: no matter what happens, no matter what or how much they suffer, they will. Not. Ever. Break.

They won't become jaded. They'll still see the joy in life. They won't ever give up, won't ever have to. They will always defeat evil in the end because they will always overcome whatever is thrown at them. Up to and including death itself.

Wouldn't it be nice if we could say the same?

I can't speak for everyone, but I angst these fine young men primarily because I want to explore how an unbreakable soul would handle my horrors, my problems, my struggles and inner turmoil, and still come out okay on the other end. How do they manage it? If an "unbreakable spirit" is the rule, how does that look? How does that work?

What can I learn about myself by putting these guys through hell?

The light is made brighter to our eyes after suffering in darkness. Anguish and pain carve out the depths of the soul required to feel exquisite joy. These young men, these little boys, these heroes aren't happy in spite of the horrors they've suffered.

They're able to experience that joy precisely because they've suffered.

So yes, let the boys be happy. Let them laugh. Let them have fun. But always remember: There is no true joy without the experience of pain.

#linkeduniverse #linked universe #lu #loz #legend of zelda #gee it would probably help if I actually tagged my post before sharing it #maybe it was an adventure

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i-sveikata · 3 months

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Hello, I just wanted to write that I re-read the last chapter again (I can’t stop) Your fanfic is what kept my mental health going (it was a really hard year) over the past year and I’m grateful for that 🥰But I was so immersed in this story, on at the moment this is the only ff that I read on this fandom, and it should already be so (for more than a year now, it’s incredible)😊I like that the characters are so alive, the feelings are so vivid, and they are so intertwined with depth and important themes and also with sex (Vegas's pov still haunts me, I'm really looking forward to reading some kind of sexual experience from his point of view, because he's just so bad for it, AND VERY HOT), but we know that he hides his real emotions 👀I’m looking forward to how events will develop further, you are so talented 💘It’s so incredible that you can write such a beautiful, emotional story for FREE that will find such a response in many, I’ve been here for a year now and I’ll wait as long as you want to enjoy this work and read how these two live their happy twisted life (and this is just my wish...in my head it’s a canon that they killed Korn, ehhh dreams)😈At the end I want to wish you health and send hugs 🫂 And if possible, can I have a little spoiler about “Vegas will do something stupid, and Pete will do something even worse” I’m so interested 😭😭😭 But if not, then I’m okay with it and ready to wait further 💜 P.S. I’m not a native English speaker, I hope everyone is here It's clear

oh hello there!!! oh my gosh that honestly means so much to hear that and im so happy it could offer something meaningful during the past year though i do hope this year treats you better!!

ahhhhhhh thank you so much!!! im so glad you think i brought it to life that way!! oh wow yes his pov is very much diving under the surface of what Pete has been interpreting this entire time. wow yes and if there is a sex scene in his pov you can bet its going to be deeply obsessed and unsettling whilst we hear how he experiences that from his pov and how it all makes him feel. like dude high key wants to climb inside petes body and live there permanently there will be no normal internal thoughts whilst theyre having sex haha.

youre so right he does hide way too much!!! and were going to be seeing a lot of that the more we have his POV. ah thank you thank you!! its honestly been so amazing that its resonated with people this much and the experience has been so rewarding!! ah thank you youre too sweet!

omg yeah they should murder korn what an idea. thank you!!! sending you good health and hugs too!!!

oh sure!! well basically its going to revolve around pete finally deciding that he wants to bottom but when he tries to bring that up in his usual halting, beating around the bush kind of way vegas just ends up putting his mouth in it. but like in the most extreme, worst way possible. badly enough that pete makes his own petty, spiteful plan instead and decides to go elsewhere, knowing that it will set vegas off in the worst way but hes angry enough to try and rub that in vegas' face.

except- well it backfires and then the both of them are really into it and they both end up getting exactly what they wanted in the end anyway.

hope thats enough of a spoiler hint!

your english is great!!! and its very clear and easy to understand!! honestly so impressed with people who know more than one language and who talk to people in that other language!! like ur brain???? its so powerful!!!

hope you have a nice night!!

#fic asks #ill fill the graveyards until i have you #spoilers

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flyingfluse · 6 months

Text

AZIRAPHALE SONG

Did anyone ask me to write a song about Aziraphale? Nope. Did I feel the undying need to spend every free second of the last two months doing it anyway, loosing my sanity in the process? Absolutely. So here are the lyrics for Aziraphale Alone, a 8-9 minute classical music/musical inspired soliloquy of our favorite angel, diving into his brilliant and confused brain after the season 2 finale. Enjoy!

(note: I plan on posting a version that is less explicitly romantic, especially without a certain section in this song, for people who view their love as ace and don’t feel comfortable reading their ship in this light)

Aziraphale Alone

Heaven. Aziraphale is alone, lonely, exhausted. And a bit annoyed.

Endless white, so blank, so bright.

This place is unbearably dull.

No colours, no smells, no ringing bell

As the door opens to the shop of Mr. Fell.

No vintage wine, no books, no Sondheim!

No trace of humour or wits.

No Sundays in Parks, no clever remarks

And no dinners at the Ritz.

Aziraphale fondly remembers his time on earth with a certain someone.

At night my heart's turned into rivers of ink,

When there was magic in the air.

And in the blink of an eye I would sink

Into the depths of a warm yellow glare

Building a home, fragile yet quaint

With a good fortune to share

A place with the pleasure of no self-restraint

Where stars are made in the most fervid of flares.

Our timeless dance is enchanting the shop

No miracle could compare.

(reluctant) Then the music stopped. The curtain dropped.

(woeful) And no nightingale sang in Berkeley -.

(Composing himself) You and I have spent millennia working on opposite sites.

And truly I as a dutiful angel was meant to resent and despise

The foul fiend demon Crowley supposedly one of the worst of his kind,

But the meanest, most hurtful deed you ever did was uttering those lines.

Music picks ups speed. Choir joins in as well as the full orchestra.

(getting more and more irritated) How could you dare to simply declare

the absence of our song?

When I was right there, one half of the pair,

of the us you claimed you long to be!

But apparently so

there's so much I don't know!

As if I hadn't learnt a thing

seeing how they burnt your wings,

casting you down below!

I may seem naive, but there's one thing I now understand

That we can't achieve peace, when our castle is made of sand.

Our lovely reprieve has finally come to an end!

For there will be another storm we can't take cover from.

We must act now there's no time for laments!

And there was a solution how we could reduce any

risk of losing what matters most,

So then how could you choose to leave me and refuse

the chance we could have used to finally depose

The faulty regime, heaven's design

is flawed, I know, I am not blind!

That's why we need to find a way to make it right

For heaven's the root of truth, goodness in light.

Still certainly better than the other side!

There may be exemptions to the rule,

But hell is still callous cold and cruel

With torment and torture as daily routines.

Do you think I haven't seen

How you have suffered all these years?

How you have struggled to fight the fear,

That's lingering in your eyes, when you try to hide

your kindness behind a shady guise.

You say you're not nice, a demon who's wily

Wicked, vicious, who always lies.

You can fool everyone and yourself,

But I know your goodness far too well.

Your heart and decency break quietly, secretly

straight through the ceiling of what is allowed!

You act when something‘s wrong, knowing you could be gone

right when the graveyard yawns and hell breathes out.

(Softly) Can you blame me for wanting to see

You smile like you did back then,

When stars filled your eyes with wonder and glee.

I just want you to be that happy again.

You‘ve grown so gloomy, weary and tired.

So I tried to bring you the sun,

(hurt) But you‘ve clarified that‘s not what you desire.

I don‘t even know why I’m stunned,

I guess I was the silly one.

He remembers what followed after their argument.

But then you pulled me in, caught me by surprise,

Warning sirens were howling above.

But shock and confusion would quickly subside.

One glorious moment it all wore off.

One ardent touch and the world fell away

And with it the looming and intricate veil

Of pretence, apprehension, prejudice and pride,

I get lost in indulgence that we’ve been denied.

My hands wander up as my thoughts wander down.

The taste of your tempting lips lets me drown

Deep in your divine, deserving embrace,

Your sweet velvet wine, I could drink it for days.

A ravenous craving I’ve tried to control

To selfishly savour your body and soul.

The music crescendos, getting faster and faster.

Oh how I wish we could just run

Away and paint our own shade of grey.

A fervent mix of blue and red,

Two parts of a painting that finally connect.

You take the wheel, full speed ahead,

Home, to a place where we will forget

The watchful eyes and silent threats

and at last-

Stop!

You‘re going too fast.

(Broken)

Endless white, it shines so brightly through the open blinds.

I shakily stand on this earth we were send to and

can't understand just what I should do.

These quarrelsome queries that I've grown so wary of

haunting my mind like ghosts in a tomb.

How to follow my heart with the song of the lark

bringing back bitter sweetness I‘ve tried to discard?

I just try to be good.

I need to be good.

Why is that so incredibly hard?

And maybe I’m where the problem lies, a

pathetic excuse for an angel for sure,

Destined to fail, disloyal, a liar,

Too soft, too scared and too insecure.

(Overcome with love) But you‘ve made a change, you helped me see

That I am worth the effort of

Risking paperwork to save me from quandaries,

That me being there is more than enough.

You‘re so much kinder than everyone else,

So how come that you are the one who fell?

Even though I have been also defying them,

so terrified of losing her love.

Can’t tell, what’s right or wrong, now that you're truly gone,

how can I move along in the above?

Still, my faith in god stand, I know she’s got a plan

So ineffable even to those who attempt

To end life here on earth, erase progress and mirth

It just can’t be true that all this was meant to be!

(He stops. Shocked. Scared.)

(slowly) Asking questions that’s how it starts,

First the fall, then falling apart.

Can it be that it’s hell I am running towards?

But maybe just maybe her divine intent

has always been for me to thwart!

(With growing conviction) God can’t be where the problem lies,

But there’s a blaze scorching the management board.

It’s said that you must fight fire with fire,

And I was the one given the flaming sword!

I can’t just turn my back and run,

I’ll get that book, take out my gun,

Won’t shoot past the ear, but aim for the head,

a moral argument they won’t forget!

I will make a change. I will make them see

We don’t need more floods but simply a dove!

Don’t they know heaven’s supposed to be

A place of kindness and love?

And you, my dear, left me no choice

But to walk this path alone

Like water off ducks, this picture of us,

Slid right through my fingers, turning to dust.

I left my home, lost all I loved

Though one thing I couldn‘t stand

Even if nothing lasts forever

I cannot lose my best friend!

You’ve rescued me so many times,

all part of our little dance.

And now that the music has picked up its pace

it’s my turn to take a stance!

I get it now! You won‘t come back,

but I won’t wait till they attack!

Got some things to suggest,

This time I won‘t stand still!

I’m a guardian angel and protect this world I will!

(Quieter, gentler, but with equal resolve)

Protect my world, I will.

#I originally planned a 4 minute piece #but anything less than what I’ve written felt like it wouldn’t have done justice to Mr. “Let-me-start-at-the-VERY-beginning”#I will eventually make a recording #but this will most likely include a full blown orchestra and choir and I don’t have the time for all that atm #I just couldn’t resist sharing it any longer #this series has taken over my life #thank you Neil Gaiman and Michael Sheen for inspiring me to write this #good omens #good omens 2 #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #the final fifteen #do it again #good omens meta #character song #good omens song #good omens poem #good omens art #good omens music

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drewsaturday · 4 months

Text

i've had such a weird relationship with making fanon things lately for a few diff reasons i think.

i haven't rly been inspired enough to take things beyond my thoughts and make an actual thing out of them. part of this is probs bc of my medication. the other part is that...

i don't have the time to dig too deeply into my favorite things rn. this means i don't dig up new parts to feel excited about, i don't feel Qualified to carry those ideas out bc my understanding of the source material is so limited and people expect waaaay too much quality from fanworks these days, and i feel like i'll never be able to finish what i start anyway.

lastly, i've been doing fandom so repetitively i'm just... tired? of the same thing over and over again. i work on a thing, i polish the thing, i post the thing, i wait for feedback that is either nice/mean/empty, rinse and repeat. the solution would be to just not post these things, but why go through all that effort to carry something up out of an idea stage then since that's what makes me most excited? and if i spend the time drafting, it feels like a waste of time since it's not going to go anywhere.

i do think a lot of this is medication, because it dulls Just how insane i am capable of getting about a thing. in the past i would have sooo much drive because i felt like if i didn't make a thing, i'd explode. i don't rly get that anymore, at least not in a big enough burst to keep me working on things very long.

i've instead been thinking a lot about diving into original content because... although i make everything for fun, i think original stuff has way less of the above issues attached.

there's no time limit. i'm not... "competing" for being able to get an idea done first, or trying to get a fanfic out while there's still hype over a show, or worrying about my work being ooc compared to someone else's, or worrying the fandom landscape i vibe with is going to change when people move on.

it's theoretically not as repetitive. i'm sure the things i'm interested in shows are similar to what i come up with from my brain, and i could just try to make different things for fandom than i'm used to. but i am kind of tired of my inability to do anything besides hurt/comfort oneshots for the same kind of pairing over and over again. this would force me to actually develop other shit too lmfao.

it's Technically something i could profit off of if i really wanted to, making it less of a waste of time. for fandom, it feels like a waste of time if i'm not putting a fanon thing out for other fans to see. it also feels like i put a ton of work into my own little understanding of a show--fleshing out backstories and worldbuilding etc. so if i move onto another fandom... it feels like it was all for nothing, esp if i don't make something from it all. ideally i would be doing it just for the fun but there needs to be some balance with what i consider pay-off. and since i usually don't stay motivated long enough to do these big huge projects, or people move on, or other people do the idea first because i work so slow, it's just gotten rly un-motivating.

there's like, layers of motivation imo. i like a thing and i get excitement about making stuff for it and exploring certain parts of it. and i can do that for myself, but to make it stand on its own enough to post for other people to see isn't something i currently get enough motivation for. and because of that, it makes the fun part feel like a waste of time i guess.

i usually stay away from my own original stuff bc i honestly just don't feel the level of excitement with it as i have felt with fandom in the past, and... it's just harder lmao? but i think it would be good for me to at least fuck around with it.

fandom started as a vessel for creativity for me. i wanted to make videos, it gave me footage. i wanted to draw, it gave me designs for characters. i wanted to write, it gave me a sandbox to play in. and i still find those things fun, but i guess it just feels like i'm limiting myself by only playing with other people's dolls in a public park for all to see. like i'm just not as connected to the Making part as a hobby or to the parts of myself i would put into it.

idk, i am just rambling and i think honestly if i Did have more time it would help take a lot of the above pressures and risks away and balance me out so that making silly little fanfics sometimes would feel more worth it because i'd feel free to do other things as well.

i also do sort of get glued to the screen when i'm in mode of making and posting things and i'd like to uhhh. do other things with my life too sometimes lmfao. part of this boredom does probably stem from being chronically ill and therefore barely leaving my house. i haven't been able to do other things beyond fanon creations in years. so no wonder i'd feel less inspired and more bored.

i also think i've gotten tired of watching things feeling like a chore. oh shit i need to write down this scene so i can use it on a fanvid, or make sure i take note of this piece of dialogue for this character's backstory, etc. i know i bitch about how i don't hate the word "content creator" bc it is just an easier catch-all for me as someone who makes lots of diff things, and i still agree with that, but i do think because of my own levels of perfectionism, mixed with honestly how weirdly expectant of quality fandom has become, it's become a chore to engage with source material.

another thing is i've always felt like i've needed a purpose in what i've made and that purpose tends to be justified by the community interactions. it makes me feel less lonely and it helps me feel inspired and like... it doesn't hurt to know you'll get feedback on something because you've found so many supportive friends in it. i rly just haven't landed in any new communities i vibe with a ton for the things ive gotten into lately, so there's less motivation there. that's not to say anyone's Bad, just... discord servers are too big, tags are too dead or all over the place, i don't message people to become friends, and the communities and friends i do have from fandom are all kinda doing different things rn, etc.

the other form of purpose would be challenges--exchanges, bingos, etc. this fanwork isn't just a random thing for fun, it has a reason for me to work on it enough to let it see the light of day. and i think i've kinda broken my brain a bit using those for motivation so much, but the alternative would be to never get anything into a publishable state, but without it being a publishable state and interacting with communities through it there's no reason for me to really spend all that much time on it in the first place, which means i'm really not getting to Create.

i think the biggest issue these days if every part of the creative process now feels like it's "for show" and original stuff that has literally no audience is the only way to kinda undo the amount of rules that's put on me and my creativity.

tl;dr i'm just not feeling the same fulfillment from making fanon stuff as i used to so i guess i need to experiment with making other things so i can still do the Making part and see where that lands me, and see if it can help undo some of the toxic mentalities being an exclusively fandom girlie for so long has kinda instilled in me.

i'm sure i'll still make fanon shit every so often--i honestly have been so busy that output won't be noticeably different from my usual once every five months contributions. i just need to get back into the right blend of circumstances for it to feel worth it, and until then i guess i need to dig out the dolls from my own attic instead of someone else's so i can have a less complicated vessel for creative hobbies because i'm fairly certain i'd still like to create.

#txt #this is just a v long ramble that im not sure makes much sense honestly or will be readable to anyone but myself at this point but eh #just needed to word it all out #...also just remembered another reason that causes that imbalance of fun #is chronic pain making certain art forms like drawing quite painful so although i've been wanting to learn art techniques #and practice generally in non-fandomy ways #i'm stopped by how it's more worth it to sketch a blorbo every so often #but idk i want to try figuring out better ways of going about that for myself and #since i can't have both fandom and original without pushing myself too far i kinda have to Choose art advancement #over stupid blorbo drawings #same with if i spend too much time typing etc #and that plus time constraints are why im making it out to be such a one or the other thing #but it also... is...#because i rly don't think i can keep doing fanon stuff without at least mixing things up somehow #if not moving to original stuff altogether #i do think that once im out of school and i have a more stable schedule #i'll be able to set aside specific free time each day as opposed to being all over the place #and that will help as well so i don't feel Guilty over creating things #when i should/could be doing something more productive bc i also do want to move my life forward rather than being SO escapist #and the guilt aspect gets in the way a lot more than it when i had more passion to beat it back with #that rly is my own fault tho for being in charge of my own schedule and being so bad at it lol #one last little note for myself is i think a lot abt non-fandomy hobbies i have like music #where yeah ive made some filks but for the most part idk what im doing #im just there to have fun and enjoy myself bc it's just... the entire reason i do it #and i dont rly get that from the things i also can use for fanon creations these days more readily

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wonderlandleighleigh · 1 year

Note

All Lenny’s girls ascending on him through the evening in the couch.

He has a night off.

No gigs. No lawyers. He's caught up on his writing. No real responsibilities beyond making sure the kids don't die. Midge has a gig, and normally he'd go. Support her. Have a few drinks with her after, but he's just-

It's been a lot lately, and she'd all but ordered him to stay home and relax.

He's never had someone put his needs first that way before.

There are a couple of good movies on television. He popped some popcorn on the stove, and he even has a beer at arm's reach on the coffee table.

He clicks on the television, and the moment the picture pops up, his four-year-old comes dashing into the room, diving onto the couch and crawling into his lap.

"Yes, hello," Lenny chuckles, scooping the girl into his arms, her green-brown eyes wide as they look at him.

"Daddy, how come Mama left?" Lily asks, pouting at him.

"Mama's working," he tells her. "And you're supposed to be in bed."

"Story?"

"I read you one."

She frowns. "More story?"

He takes a deep breath and lets it out. "Yes. Okay. One more story."

*****

By the time he gets Lily settled back in bed, Esther is curled up on the couch with his popcorn.

Lenny laughs and sits next to her, snatching it away and tickling her. "You little sneak."

Esther squeaks and shoves at his face. "I just wanted a snack!"

"It's late, go to bed."

"I'm big now, I'm ten!"

"That's not that big, go to your room," curl up under the covers and read or something."

Esther pouts.

"Not gonna work," Lenny grins, giving her a nudge. "Leave."

She hops up and sticks out her tongue at him. "Night, Lenny!"

"Night, darling."

*****

He gets about halfway through "They Saved Hitler's Brain" when Kitty wanders out, looking a little dejected.

Lenny frowns as he sees her. "What's that face?"

She shrugs and sits down next to him. "I think I did really badly on my math test today," she admits. "It's really depressing."

"Aw, Kit." He wraps an arm around her, squeezing her shoulders gently. "If you screwed it up that bad, we can get you a tutor, and you'll do better next time."

"Trig is just hard," Kitty pouts, slumping back. "I thought I could handle it, I'm usually so good at math!"

"You're thirteen, it's tripping you up," Lenny assures her. "It'll be okay. This is not the end of the universe."

"Don't tell Abe?" Kitty pleads.

"My lips are sealed," he promises, kissing the side of her head. "Go on back to bed. Try to get some sleep. It'll look better in the morning."

She nods and hugs him. "Thanks, Daddy."

"Anytime, kiddo," he tells her, before watching her go back down the hall.

*****

He's not sure how the movie ends. He's pretty sure he fell asleep sometime near the end, and his cracks an eye open when there's a dip in the couch.

Midge is grinning at him, lifting the beer from the table and taking a sip. "Did you have a nice night?"

Lenny nods, pulling her close and kissing her softly. "You know, I did. There were a few interruptions from the girls, but nothing I couldn't handle."

She kisses him again, smiling at him. "Good. I'm tired, I'm going to bed."

"Gimme a second to clean up, I'll join you."

She beams and gets up, leaving Lenny to stretch and tidy.

#fic #au #tmmm #Midge x Lenny #and the girls

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nanuk-the-bat · 1 month

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✨ Choose three adjectives to complement your own writing. 💻 Do you do research for your fics? What’s the deepest dive you’ve done?

✨ Choose three adjectives to complement your own writing.

-Saying nice things about one’s own stuff is always such a hard thing but if it’s pick three or take fridge duty with pre-foundation Former ummmm…colorful, niche, and amusing?

💻 Do you do research for your fics? What’s the deepest dive you’ve done?

-If I don’t know how something works, a mechanical or biological process, I will look it up. Does it have to be absolutely perfect—no. But I need a basic understanding of how something functions to envision a scene. I looked up several maps of New York to plot out what part and block Darling’s three story townhouse would actually be on to have a 15-20 minute commute to The Oldest House for a conversation he and Jesse have on their drive to work.

When I try to write and it’s not jotting down ideas or bits of dialogue from my daydreams, I have 2-15 tabs open in my web browser. I don’t specifically do intense research, but I look up, bookmark things as I go, and I’m always reading a nonfiction book of some kind (Curious nature and all). I did reread ‘A Brief History of Time’ by Stephen Hawking in an attempt of absorbing some of Darling’s doctoral vernacular, just so I could find the right comparison of celestial bodies and beauty for a tailored confession of love, and I’m working my way through a couple books on music and the brain, in hopes of one day writing my Jesse, Darling, and the harmony of Hedron/Polaris’s resonance fic.

I deliberately didn’t write ‘Anachronisms Welcome’ in the past because I found the idea of researching to avoid anachronisms too daunting at that time, much as I like time travel fics. So I brought Darling to the future. 🙃

Thanks for the ask!

#my asks #writing meme

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liverobinreaction · 1 year

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🖊️, 🌈 (banshee in a well), 💻 ?

IM SORRY I KNOW THIS IS OVER A MONTH LATE, i lost the original ask post and it took me ages to find it BUT I FOUND IT so boom! late but here

ask game here

🌈 What inspired you to write banshee in a well?

basically, i had just been thrown head first into the batman fandom and was scouring through ao3 for things to read, before i kind of. ran out. this was during the weeks i was meant to be studying and writing an essay, and i was doing literally anything except that, so i had a lot of time on my hands. now, ive always been a sucker for fake character death and angst, so i decided hey, why not shove my newest blorbo tim into something like that! initially, it was going to be a one shot where tim was trapped in a collapsing building and was crushed to death, only to crawl his way out eventually while the bats were looking for his body. i wrote the beginning, and then when i looked back up i had 10k words and a completely different plot. and so banshee in a well was born.

💻 Do you do research for your fics? What’s the deepest dive you’ve done?

yes and no! i try to actively avoid writing stuff that requires a lot of technical knowledge because im a) lazy, and b) easily distractible. the moment i start researching when i want to write means i tend to fall down a wikipedia rabbit hole and end up with knowledge about 9th century chinese concubines. do not ask. BUT that doesnt mean i never do it, especially if im writing about a specific culture or religion. for example, i did some research into jewish funeral practices for banshee in a well, and read some articles by rabbis about whether you need to sit shiva for neglectful parents.

ive also been doing a bit of research into stomach cancer atm for 'and you know this will be gone in the morning'. i also absolutely got on a watch list while looking up other things for banshee, such as: how long does it take for blood to be deoxygenated, how do you get down from a noose, can you survive a ruptured lung.

🖊 Post a snippet from a current WIP.

here's a bit from my generational depression fic 'To Find Forgiveness In The Weeds' (cw: depression and suicidal thoughts). thanks for the ask!!!

There isn’t really any sort of final straw. Maybe it would be better if there was some kind of definitive moment that he could point to and say ‘there, that’s where it all started, that’s what made me this way’. He almost wishes there was a catalyst like that, because then it would be a lot easier to explain away most of it. But Tim’s life has never been straightforward, so instead, it goes like this:

At 8am in the morning on a Tuesday, as he’s getting ready for work, Tim looks into the mirror while adjusting his tie, and realises that he doesn’t want to be alive anymore.

A mental breakdown would be easier. This sort of quiet realisation doesn’t really give much way to screaming and crying, nor is there anything he can even do with it. Granted, he’s always thought of dying in some sort of manner, but he’s never bluntly admitted to himself that he’d prefer to be dead. Most of the time, it shows up in an abstract, distant way. The temptation of a high rooftop, the ease of a subway track, the simplicity of a rope. Sometimes he’ll see death traps and feel a pull towards it. Not an active wish, so much as a temptation. A soft, gentle thought of ‘I’m tired. Wouldn’t it be nice to be dead?’

But it’s always been chased away, the logistics of actually dying and their impact keeping him away from ledges and chairs. The clean-up would be such a hassle, his brain would point out, and he’d agree. Someone would have to scrape him off the floor or tracks if he was selfish enough to do it in public, and that’s not even mentioning the traumatised passer-by’s. Ultimately, killing himself would cause more trouble than it’s worth, and that’s always been enough for him to ignore those thoughts and chalk them up to a flight of fancy or a call to the void rather than genuine suicidal ideation.

There’s none of that when he looks in the mirror and consciously acknowledges that maybe, just maybe, Tim doesn’t really want to live anymore. That, if given the chance, he can’t confidently say he wouldn’t take such an opportunity.

It’s a strange thought to have, and he finally lets his hands drop away from his tie as he observes himself. He’s seen suicidal people before, of course, both as Tim Drake and Robin and Red Robin. He watched as Bruce threw himself into deadlier and deadlier fights, uncaring of the consequences. He’s gently talked to people shivering on the edge of a skyscraper, eyes screaming for help despite their hollowness.

He doesn’t really fit that image, though logically, he knows that depression takes different forms. And that’s another thought that stops him and makes him furrow his brow. Is he depressed? Depression tends to cause suicidal ideation, so it would make sense, but once again, he’s never needed a therapist or broken down in tears from sadness.

He takes a few steps back to perch on his unmade bed. Messiness is a sign of depression, he remembers, but he’s always been messy. His father was the same way.

Except...

He glances around his room, frowning at the overflowing waste basket, the crumpled up cans and balled up protein wrappers. Clothes are haphazardly dumped into a corner, because he rarely has the energy to put them away. There’s dust everywhere except his bed, bathroom and desk, and kitchen roll still sticks to a spot on the carpet where he spilled some soda and forgot to clean it up.

It isn’t exactly the expected luxury penthouse of a CEO.

His room in Wayne Manor had been untidy, but it was the general clutter of a distracted teenager. He would still throw trash away, would dust and mop up spills when needed, because Alfred had enough on his plate already and tidying their rooms had always been their own responsibility.

His apartment, however, is messy in a way that indicates he’s stopped caring.

The thought is quiet in his mind, but it’s enough to stop everything else.

Has he?

Has he stopped caring?

#long post #bug replies #ask #anonymous #ask game #my writing #to find forgiveness in the weeds #banshee in a well #tw suicide

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tvrningout-a · 1 year

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hmm the dash is slow and it would appear i'm back on my romance mess so have a few plots for chiyo bc i have her on the brain so much these days <3 and you can consider this a plotting call -- if you like this post, i'll message you and we can discuss one of these plots!

friends to lovers to exes to strangers and maybe right back to friends to lovers bc chiyo had a boyfriend in high school whose heart she broke ( she loved him but wasn't in love with him ), and he moved away so! they never really got to patch things up or keep in contact. perhaps they meet as adults bc of school or work, a well-meaning friend sets them up, etc. i just love!! the idea this kind of dynamic bc i feel like there would be a ton to explore development-wise. why didn't it work out the first time, and why might it work out this time? how have they changed? stuff like that uvu

what if chiyo had a crush on your muse when she was younger, and instead of ever approaching your muse like a normal person, she based the main love interest of her one shot manga off of them :) what if they didn’t find out until years later when she’s a big shot mangaka and they lead separate lives :) what if they both have unresolved feelings and maybe circumstances aren’t ideal for either of them to date :) and what if your muse confronts her about it anyway :) what if :))))))

chiyo going on a date to appease her friend? okay, she can do that as much as she hates the idea. chiyo going on another date bc the person was so nice and she felt too bad to turn them down or ghost them?? yep, but she'll really put an end to things after this date! except maybe the person is so lovely that chiyo really starts to develop feelings, but then they try to kiss her and she shies away and now they're sad and confused with her behavior but so is she :((( loving isn't easy when you have the emotional bravery of a mouse

any soulmate au you could think of bc chiyo probably thought she'd never meet hers/they didn't really exist/etc. and is so very skeptical of them when they do meet! just bc they're supposed to be " destined " to love each other doesn't mean it's destined to work out and chiyo will honestly tell them that. i think she'll generally be more honest ( to an extent ) with her soulmate bc? well, the situation kinda calls for it. she can't just be agreeable and nice when she isn't keen on diving headfirst into a relationship with them.

and tbh i'm just a sucker for plots with a lot of build up and/or that force chiyo out of her comfort zone, so if you have an idea that isn't listed here and you wanna write it with chiyo, gimme gimme <3

#i owe a million messages so will i be slowly getting to everything? yes!#but my day was a lil rough so i deserve to think of chiyo in a romantic setting and so i will :' )#btw the exes plot can easily be with a lady! doesn't have to be a guy!#and now excuse me while i get a very late dinner and finish watching resident evil #and if you see a typo in this post no you don't asdf i've written so many tonight and i don't know why ;;;;;#if tags weren't editable... oh you'd see so many within the last several tags asdfg #i grew up on disney | wishlist

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catchingbigfish · 9 months

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writing plans for the rest of 2023

aka, yet another accountability post i'll laugh at in a few months when i realize how off track my plans have gone again

i am freakishly close to done with the first draft of Conversion; i'm at 57k words as of right this very second, and i'm trying very hard to not go past 90k words on the first draft (even though i think it could edge closer to 120k if i let go with full reckless abandon), and really, my target is to make it a tight 80-85k words. plus, my weekend plans to swap my office and bedroom (who the fuck decided the largest room should be the place you sleep?? that makes no sense!) have been thwarted by my fiance getting sick again, so if i run another few 4-5k days in a row? i might knock this out within the week.

on top of that, i'm enrolled in julia inglis's new shadow doll course (it's a shameless indulgence of mine) which starts august first, so it seems like the prime time to consider exactly how i plan to spend late summer/early fall and nanowrimo this year. here's my current plan:

finish the first draft of Conversion by July 31. this seems very doable so far, unless i really do let go and indulge in all those side conversations and small subplots boiling around in my brain.

spend all of august really delving into the shadow doll course, giving my brain a serious break from writing, and channel all that energy into other types of creativity. this also seems doable, but there's a chance i'll be forced onto a business trip in late august. if that's the case, it'll probably be three or four days, and i'll go ahead and do my first read-through of conversion on the trip. (i read So It Goes way too early and i realize that now -- i have to find a way to force myself to give it at least three weeks before i read through Conversion.)

spend september working on a developmental, high-level, birds-eye-view revision of the first draft of Conversion. if all goes according to plan, i'll use the first few weeks to draft new character sketches and go back to tidy up any mischaracterizations from the characters developing along the drafting process, tighten plot points that i think are dragging, and do a new zero draft based on the first draft plus any new additions i think are necessary, then spend the last few weeks doing the actual drafting for any new scenes i need (and hopefully, for the love of god, creating actual chapter breaks in there). this also seems doable.

get Conversion ready for alpha-readers and zero draft the sort-of-sequel Apostate (👀) in october. yeah i'm basically fully committed to this idea now, lol. the working title is Apostate because i'm terrible at titles and i think it's a fun counterpoint to the title Conversion. i've realized my original cult fiction concept works unreasonably well as a follow up to Conversion (and that's one of the two reasons the ending changed so dramatically), so i'm going for it. i'm not confident i can do this all in october, but i'd love to do nanowrimo again this year and draft Apostate during the month, so this is like my stretch goal. also, i'm not comfortable calling it beta reading just yet, but i'm hoping to get Conversion to a point where i can hand it off to some people who can tell me if it's working, where things are lacking, and any glaring issues i can't see because i'm too close it. (if all goes according to plan, i hope to make a call for alpha readers in early october and have the draft handed over by november so i can force myself to only work on Apostate that month! i wouldn't expect readers to actually dive in until after november, since most likely, they'll be doing nano too -- but it's just the best way to motivate myself). this is definitely the goal i see most likely to fall off track.

spend november drafting Apostate. again, the entire concept of writing Apostate is definitely the weakest link in my plans, but it would be so nice to do!

take december off. seriously, if i actually do this in the way i want, i will need *so* much of a break it's unreal.

#writeblr #about elle #wip: conversion #wip: apostate #accountability post #plans

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bonesandthebees · 2 years

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I always thought Wilbur had taken whatever stabbed him out or the object simply fell out when I read Clinic but Dream deliberately stabbing Wilbur then tearing the pipe out definitely fits with the theme of the fic and just adds to how cruel hero's can be.

Also, Wilbur not wanting to break Tommys brain by telling him that Dream had almost killed him is nice. Even if he's a supervillain he doesn't want to break the perception of some random teen civilian in the middle of Eastside. Its another major difference between the hero's and villains since Dream had showed Tommy some pretty gorey footage to try to make Wilbur look bad and make himself seem justified.

Wilbur getting up and not wanting to die because he didn't want his family to wonder where he was hit me in the feels. It definitely works with Tommys idea that villains have families that would miss them.

Then Wilbur calling Tommy a good person and saying people like him rare is sweet just like crime boys.

Overall I loved a good samaritan. It was such a good look into Wilburs mind that night and how he felt about his brush with death and the angry teen that had saved him.

-🐗

so I knew from writing the first ever chapter of clinic that dream was the one to pull out the pipe, not wilbur. as you can see back in the og first chapter, tommy noticed that wilbur likely didn't pull it out himself. i always had the mental image of dream yanking it out with his telekinesis so it was nice to finally clarify that for my readers

lmao yup wilbur didn't really feel like getting into the whole "yeah so the hero system that runs our city is actually super corrupt btw-" when he was literally exhausted from blood loss and knew it would probably fuck the kid up a lot to learn that. definitely different compared to the heroes

originally that whole bit with wilbur getting off the roof was a lot darker tonally but I decided to rewrite it to make it a bit less dark to fit the themes of clinic more. it's still very fucked up, but in the original while wilbur's reasoning for getting off the roof was similar, it was a lot more nihilistic and fucked up (although I like what I went with a lot more)

crimeboys <333 my loves <33

so glad you enjoyed!! i started writing good samaritan kind of on a whim but i'm really happy I did bc it was a fun dive back into the clinic world!

#ask #boar anon #clinic

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threadsun · 11 months

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Note to self: Do not eat jellybeans while reading your posts or they become a choking hazard. But I don’t like the idea of submitting JUST like that! It feels way too easy! Plus, I’m such a people pleaser that breaking rules or not following orders is too much fun for me NOT to pass up! I don’t know if I feel praised or insulted from you saying I do a very good job at pretending to be a brat lol. My brain is like, “PRAISE? I DO GOOD?” And at the same time I’m just like, “I AIN’T PRETENDING!” 😂 But if I’m insatiable, then I can’t ever be a brat then~?

Holy hell. Okay, so listen. Freaking love performing songs like Bring on the Men from Jekyll and Hyde, Noel’s Lament from Ride the Cyclone, and Why Don’t You Do Right (Yeah, that’s right. From freaking Who Framed Rodger Rabbit.) because of the fact I love the idea of being sexually desirable but untouchable. Driving people WILD with lust, but never allowing them to feel more than what I let them (small touches, dragging fabric over their body, that kind of thing) Honestly, I’d do burlesque or some sort of dancing (belly dancing, pole work, floor work) if I was at a smaller size again. So when you’re freaking EXPOSED me like that with exhibition kink description, something NO ONE but myself knows, freaking hell man, I don’t even know what to say lol. One of my fav experiences was teasing my last partner on a Ferris Wheel with light touches whenever no one could see us, but the chance we could’ve got caught. UGH! Love it! Honestly I’d love to put on a show for people and be surrounded, like DAMN! Also, I’ve never heard of predicament play and free use until now so I just went on a deep dive AND YES! Didn’t know it was an actual kink BUT YES!!!! But Jesus Christ, like 24/7 and just, like, okay, words are hard. I’m gonna just stop for a moment. Was trying to think of how to respond to the last bit there but yeah. I don’t know if it’s cause I’m tired or something, but yeah, can’t think of better words right now! Okay, I actually came back to here after writing everything because I’m doing a bit better, but I wanted to say it’s ironic that you brought up the 24/7 thing because I was JUST THINKING yesterday about how helpful it’d be to have a dom outside of sex to become more disciplined. Ya know, the whole, “Drink water.” kind of thing. I’m very dehydrated 😂 I’d probably benefit from a Jack who pushes me to wake up early and not eat a whole bowl of whipped cream lol.

On to a part I can actually respond to! DEFINITELY ideal!!! It’d be nice if we can bump that to a 95%, but I know they have jobs to do so lol. Okay, nvm, thinking OVERALL is hard lol so sorry for the drop in quality! I also meant to put Shaun popped in for the last post, between falling asleep trying to type and my phone liking to autocorrect sentences typed correctly, it just came out as “S” 😂 Imagine having a conversation with Jack about it though where you’re like, “Man, I wish I could have a dog, but my allergies won’t let me.” Jack just looks at you with a serious expression and says, “Well, why don’t you BE a dog then since you can’t have one?” LOL.

I’m glad it went well!!! I know some people automatically assume that someone who wants to go into sex work based career do it only because they have to based off the negative stigma created by media, but I hope that some day people who want to go into sex work because they enjoy it can be viewed the same way as someone who wants to be a doctor or some other career. Full of excitement and acceptance! I’m glad at least when you explained it to them though that they were happy and supportive of you!!! 🩵 But yeah! Ya gotta do what ya gotta do so I tried to enjoy those experiences the best I could! Also, I didn’t consider how I could get more involved in the community by being a part of local productions, I might really need to push forward on that then! Kinda miss having that.

OOO OO OO! Freaking I’d LOVE to tell you more about all the cool places around me!! Plus, from traveling around the country so much, I got to see many different stylistic choices on how houses or buildings are designed in certain areas and how each city always has some unique variation that no other place has! Like, Cape May, NJ looks like it’s FILLED with Victorian Doll Houses while Baltimore has a more a jazzy vibe. Another fun thing too is that if you like ghostie goos, then it just adds ANOTHER fun layer to the history and architecture talk, cause not only do I do ghost investigations, but I’m also extremely sensitive to that stuff too so I’ll get things and ask someone who works there about it or read it on one of the signs and it’d be EXACTLY what I picked up on. It can be freaky at times but it definitely adds another layer of depth and respect to those who’ve passed. Cool ghost fact that mixes architecture for you! Did you know one of the most used examples of beautifully crafted Victorian/Gilded Age houses in America is located in Gavelston, TX? It’s called Bishop’s House or Gresham’s Castle and it was built in 1892, but it has a catch. Though it’s absolutely beautiful, the most well known ghost, Walter Gresham, absolutely HATES IT when people take photos of his home or even go near it. He’s super protective of his property and is known to push, scratch, trip, or even punch people who get too close. I remember when I couldn’t even go down the street it was on even though I didn’t know about this at the time. My gut was just going like, “NOPE! NOT THERE!” 😂 I don’t do touching lol. Apparently his wife haunts the place too, but they have tours of the house and pics online. But I’ll definitely check it out! I always rushed through there because they had a Tesla coil show that was LOUD and so I’d speed walk to the other exhibit before it started, but now I got a reason to stay 😂 AWWWWW, Flumps sounds ADORABLE!!! 🥹 Oh, but I gotta ask, what scents did y’all get? I always wind up getting very coconut or cake based ones because apparently things I know I can’t eat smell better than things I can. Or maybe I like to torture myself or something, who knows! Lol.

EXACTLY! Sure, fluffy things are nice and all, but your classic yandere isn’t going to be all sunshine and rainbows if you start hanging out with others. Like, they kidnap, manipulate, stalk,

torture, and kill people. It’s gonna be kinda hard to avoid that overall if someone is uncomfortable with those topics, much less the kinkier sides of things. And sure, if they’re not a fan of certain kinks, then they can write fanfics or headcanons without them or stories more suited to their tastes, but they shouldn’t be going to the official source and asking them to change certain aspects because they don’t like it. I mean, people personally change things all the time! Some people might make a character more sub leaning and some might make them dom leaning because it fits their kinks better, but they don’t bully the creators to follow a vision THEY want to see. There are some really nit picky behaviors here definitely.

Maybe~! Maybe I do, but maybe I like to keep you guessing~ Okay, that’s a lie, I’ve been extremely open about everything so I don’t think I’m really hiding anything. Not thinking is nice, I’ll admit~ Definitely makes it harder to write or reread sentences to make sure they’re grammatically correct though 😂

-🎃

How fun~ A brat is only a brat if their dom allows them to be, though. You just need to find someone willing to let you indulge your desire to ignore the rules and disobey. But in the end, is that really any fun for you if you don't get put back in your place and railed afterwards?

I wasn't bluffing when I said I can tell peoples' kinks from the slightest things. It's wonderful, how desperate you are to be wanted and desired! Makes it much easier to reward you or punish you. A little attention here, a little ignoring there. Though I prefer rewards if I can help it. Like rewarding you by letting you be at the centre of a crowd who can look at you, but can't touch. Letting them watch me punish you while you're tied up and at my mercy. You'd look so good, make such beautiful sounds, put on such a nice show for all those people who are wild with lust for you. But you'd be all mine.

24/7 dynamics are very useful for making people take care of themselves!! Someone reminding you to do the necessary stuff, and then rewarding you when you do them~ Jack would be so good at that!

Awwww it's cute that you're so worked up, you're struggling to write! But absolutely, you talk about wishing there was a fire station dog and suddenly you're the fire station dog!! But hey, it's a good gig. They take care of everything for you, all you have to do is look pretty and let them fuck you.

Yeah, overall it was very nice to be able to explain to them that it's a passion rather than a necessity! Especially because I have done survival sex work before, so I know the difference and was able to articulate it. But yeah, getting involved in community stuff is always good!!

That sounds so cool!!!! I go up to Boston sometimes and they've got a lot of Victorian houses there and they're all so pretty!! Especially the ones that still have stained glass in some of the windows!! Gresham's Castle sounds cool but also terrifying to go to, especially if you're sensitive to those things. I am, unfortunately, the exact kind of dumbass who's too curious and will go towards places I get bad feelings about just to check it out and find out why.

Yeah, exactly!!! Fanfic and fanart and headcanons are there for a reason, and it's fine if they don't line up with canon, they don't have to! But you can't go demanding that your headcanons become canon. That's a level of entitlement and arrogance that astounds me. No one should think they know characters better than the creator of said character.

I'm glad you're so open, it makes it much easier to tease you~

#sunshine #asks #🎃 anon

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