#it just puts this barrier between how i see myself and how others see me which granted will always exist but the distance between the two

[transmascnepetaleijon]

something my social media break showed to me was how much time i actually spend just mindlessly scrolling tumblr, so now im actually in the journey to minimize that

#like its one thing to spend 4 hours playing videogames or reading or writing or just laying around but its an other thing to spend 4 hours- #- literally just. starring at my screen. pressing buttons. reading shit ill forget about in 2-3 minutes. #it made me realize im kiind of wasting time on here #im not gonna completely cut away all social media in my life no thats kind of stupid #but also maybe i should modify how i interact with it idk. my style of blogging is pretty cool i think i just come here and Say Things #and i enjoy it but like... man i dunno its getting on my nerves cus i want to do other things im restless #its probably help me with y mental shit too if i got more out there instead of being cooped up into my internet sphere #*maybe* the optimal decision would be to i dunno really put into perspective that this is INTERNET stuff and that i should prioritize - #NON INTERNET stuff. like sure i post everyday i reblog and i interact and shit but my main sphere*shiuld not* be in here #thats really hard tho. i dont feel connected with who i am irl cus uuuhhhh closeted trans teen #and hearing people refer to me as a girl with girl name and girl actions and girl everything is. it really sucks. #sure being a gnc bi girl is a pretty cool thing i dont really feel awful about it #it just puts this barrier between how i see myself and how others see me which granted will always exist but the distance between the two #is so big that it straight up feels like im roleplaying someone else sometimes #i should not this down for when i get another therapist i think thisd be a very interesting thing to talk about fr #**note #ah i dunno. many struggles going on in my life and none of them end up being in focus so it all feels like a web of discomfort #im done talking about this now peace #txt

[bamsara]

what are your most favorite tropes? :3c

IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED:

Near death experiences

Emotional revelations due to said near death experiences

Enemies to Friends to Lovers

Mutual Pining but they believe its unrequieted

"you're my worst enemy but you're so important to me"

Drunk chapter where at least One fist fight happens

Bridal carry after someone gets injured

Slow Burn...of course

"i got you this gift because it benefits me and im not telling you how" (the benefit is seeing the other person enjoy the gift)

Force Alliances or Temporary Truces

"I don't like killing but I'll do it for you"

"I prefer to kill my problems but I won't, for you."

Or: "This person has no idea how many people I've killed in order to protect or provide for them and I'm going to keep it that way."

Mean or Villian Character is actaully a really good Sibling/Parent/Child,ect and has someone they care about

Or better, Villian character adopts child AND is a good parent

Everyone knows the pairing likes each other except for the pairing

Temporary (or non-temp)Amnesia

"I learn your favorite things because I plan to use them against you one day" (proceeds to not do that) (proceeds to get them food or items that persons likes just because they like them)

Breaking and Entering. Literally.

Person A is in love, Person B says they're not but they're 10x times worse actaully

Slip-of-the-tongue/Accidental confessions. Doesn't have to be love confessions but just "whoops i was not supposed to say that"

Biting as a love language

One is feral and bloodthirsty but is put in the position of 'protecting an idiot' because the other is also feral and has no self-preservation. Both characters must be badass, just equally stupid

Kiss on the head/cheek while the other person is sleeping

Bloodstained kiss

Heat-of-battle confession about something

Protagonist refusing to become villian or repeat villian mistakes, not in a 'owo i cant do that its bad' and more like 'fuck you you dont get to see what you wanted to make of me'

Signifier of 'this is my friend/family/lover'. Could anything between a ring, a jacket over someone's shoudlers or scent marking, anything

"if im immortal, then you gotta be too or we both dyin"

Knight x Their Charge

Human x Non-Human

Sunshine x Grump

Character that looks sooooo cute. Oh he's a little fucked up actaully

"ahhaha he's such a freak haha. i need him carnally."

They are mortal enemies. They are also best friends.

Hostage / Rescued trope plus Hostage / Doesn't get to rescue because the hostage killed everyone already

Plot info that's missing that's vital to the story and it's revealed that One of the pairing or someone in the group knew the info the entire time

"I said mean things to you because I hate you, so why am I feeling guilty now"

There was only One Bed

Really competent and scary character is really GOOD at a harmless and charming small hobby completely uncharacteristic to their public persona

Nightmares. And then sleeping in the same bed because of nightmares

Cultural differences / Language Barrier

Character gets so surprised flustered they trip over something or break something and it topples and it starts a chain reaction like a cartoon

There are more but these are some of which I can remember off the top of my head. I've written many of these myself in several of my stories and will continue to do so until the end of time, esp my faves

#writings #writing list #trope list #sara shush

[hedgehog-moss]

Pampe escaped her pasture in 2 unprecedented ways this month, and I know she would want me to let everyone know.

First of all I saw her trotting towards the drinking trough the other day and something about her determined ears and the malevolent glint in her eyes didn’t match her wholesome destination, so I stood there watching warily, and—she jumped. I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t seen it, the trough is like 1.80m long and full of water and it’s sandwiched between a tree and the fence. It forms a natural moat-like barrier, or so I thought. She just jumped the whole length of it. It’s a long jump!! I heard a splash when her back hoof landed in the water, which would have cost her a few points in a llama show jumping event, but still it was impressive, she just did this:

Fortunately, on the other side of the trough is my neighbour’s pasture and I know he doesn’t mind if my llama occasionally squats it in the winter. Still, I make a big show of being displeased when I find Pampe there by herself, so she continues thinking she’s trespassing. I let her graze for a while then I pretend I’m only just noticing her and I'm like gasp, hands-on-hips “PAMPÉRIGOUSTE!! You know you’re not allowed in here!” and she trots back to her own pasture like hehehe and this way I make sure she doesn’t try another, actually-forbidden pasture farther away.

And secondly—I’d already noticed last month that she had discovered how to use her long neck to go over the gate and fiddle with the latch. You’d think the latch would be safe since it’s outside, but no. She hasn’t figured out how to open it yet, but she knows it holds the secret to freedom. And yesterday I forgot to close the latch and she immediately noticed, because apparently she checks several times a day. I looked out the window and saw her like this:

I figured she’d stay near the house and eat some brambles, I didn’t have time to deal with her right now so I leant out the window and shouted COME BACK then considered I had done my best and went back to what I was doing. But then I went outside half an hour later and Pampe was nowhere to be seen—and there was a big plume of smoke on the horizon. Rationally it could only be a distant neighbour burning green waste, but my first thought was “... what has she done now.” I was fully ready to accept that my problem llama was also an arsonist, and pictured myself haltering her and leading her to someone’s door to make her apologise for setting their barn on fire. 

I guess I wouldn’t put it past you to see some crossbars and fence-fixing tools stored in a barn and assume you’re looking at a fence factory, and bomb it.

I know.

#crawling along #llama drama #by now i know i don't have to run after her because if her family refused to follow her she always comes back sooner or later #she's like pff you guys are no fun and grudgingly turns herself in

[misshoneyimhome]

Yes to sinning in the penalty box! 🙏🏻🌶️

Alright, so this one was a bit tricky, I must admit, as I didn't know how I wanted the exact order - However, in the end, I believe it came together quite nicely 😉

This particular piece was naturally accompanied by a couple of other fantastic requests: [The Penalty Box] [This sweet ass] and [Don’t you like when I do this?] and I genuinely hope I was able to bring your visions to life 🌺⚡️

And, no, I didn't anticipate it being quite this lengthy… but, you know, sometimes I just give up on myself 🙈

Nevertheless, I hope you find enjoyment in it! 🤍

Warnings; smut 18+; oral sex (f receiving), mention of oral sex (m receiving), mutual masturbation (twice), use of magic Wand, use of anal plug, is it cumshot when it's on yourself? penetrative sex (p in v) in semi-public spacing;

Word count; 8K

"Min vackra prinsessa..." = my beautiful princess

[Inexperienced!reader x Willy]

・✶ ｡ﾟ

All good boys go to heaven - But bad boys bring heaven to you pt XI I William Nylander 🖋️⚡️💦

The most challenging aspect of being in a relationship with an NHL player was undoubtedly the lengthy road trips. While you appreciated the occasional peace and the less chaotic routines of attending games and spending time with your boyfriend, William Nylander, whenever possible, being apart for seven days felt like an eternity.

Yet at times, you couldn't help but feel a bit silly for feeling this way, especially when you heard about your colleagues’ partners being away for two weeks at a time every now and then. However, your situation felt distinct to you.

Not only was William away on the road for a week, but even when he was home in Toronto, his schedule was anything but typical, unlike many of your colleagues' partners who had a straightforward 9-5, Monday to Friday routine. Instead, William had early morning skating sessions, workouts squeezed in between ice time and meals, physiotherapy sessions to maintain his peak physical condition, and then the essential recovery time like ice baths or simply resting at home.

To put it bluntly, being the girlfriend of a professional hockey player was far from straightforward.

You constantly had to adjust to his schedule, carving out time between your own work commitments and meeting him to spend time with your friends. And when things didn't align, it felt like your worlds collided. Not that you ever made a fuss about it, because you knew you would always find a way to make it work. Nevertheless, every now and then, you needed to have an honest conversation about the reality of the situation.

And fortunately, you had a supportive group of girlfriends to share your feelings with: The WAG’s of the Toronto Maple Leafs. 

The Swedish ladies had become some of your closest friends, as William spent a significant amount of time with his Swedish teammates. Which you didn't mind at all; it was enjoyable to see him bonding with his fellow countrymen. And despite the language barrier, they were all very welcoming and made an effort to include you in their conversations.

You even attempted to learn some Swedish to grasp what they were saying in their native language, but you weren't quite confident enough to reveal it yet. Only a select few of the girls who had been assisting you were aware, but you kept it from William, at least for the time being.

For now, you helped him pack his suitcase early on Monday morning before he departed for a week.

"Oh, pack the lilac suit, that's one of my favourites!" you suggested with a smile as the two of you rummaged through the wardrobe. "And the turquoise one, it really suits you."

"I thought all my suits looked good on me," William chuckled, laying out the suits on the bed that you had selected for him to bring along.

"Babe, they absolutely do," you smiled, gently caressing his back as you leaned against his warm body. "But I don’t need to tell you that, otherwise your already sky-high confidence would skyrocket even further," you playfully teased.

Helping William pack was always enjoyable for you. Not only because you knew all the tricks, but also because you loved seeing him in your favourite outfits. And as you stood together in your shared bedroom, admiring the choices he'd agreed to, you couldn't help but notice how effortlessly stylish he’d look in each one. His confidence and charm only enhanced his appeal, and you found yourself falling for him all over again with each passing moment.

"You know," William said, breaking the comfortable silence between you, "I don't know what I would do without you. You make everything so much easier, even when I'm on the road."

You smiled, feeling a surge of warmth in your chest at his words. "And I don't know what I would do without you," you replied softly, reaching up to tenderly cup his cheek.

William leaned into your touch, his eyes reflecting the depth of his affection for you. "I love you," he whispered, his voice filled with sincerity.

"I love you too," you whispered back, feeling your heart swell with emotion.

And almost in perfect sync, you both leaned in slowly, closing the gap between you.

As your lips met in a tender kiss, a rush of warmth flooded through you, enveloping you in a cocoon of love and passion. Time seemed to stand still as you melted into each other, savouring the sweetness of the moment.

Gently, William let his tongue press against your lips, and you eagerly welcomed him in, allowing his tongue to intertwine with yours. The kiss gradually grew more intense, your fingers almost digging into the back of his neck as you pulled him closer.

Likewise, his hands gripped your hips, holding you firmly as his mouth explored yours, conveying the depth of his emotions with fervent passion.

Then breaking the kiss, you both gasped for air. You knew William had to leave soon, but you couldn't bear to let him go, not just yet. You wanted to feel his body against you, to create a lasting memory to cherish until his return.

"Willy," you breathed out softly, signalling your desire for him, and he seemed to understand.

"Me too, baby," he murmured, pressing his body against yours, unwilling to part just yet.

And in a swift movement, he grasped you by the bottom, lifting you effortlessly and laying you down on the bed. Hovering over you, he let his lips find yours once again, and soon you were entangled in a passionate embrace, sharing every ounce of desire before the inevitable separation.

Your fingers instinctively threaded through his blonde locks, holding onto him as if unwilling to let him go. While your hips moved against his, craving his touch, his presence. But William had other intentions.

Seeking to ensure that his actions would leave an indelible mark, reminding you that there was no one else but him, William broke his lips away from yours and trailed them slowly down your jawline, settling on your neck.

His mouth possessed a magical quality, an enchantment that easily captivated you. And you willingly surrendered to it each time.

As his lips sucked and nipped at your sensitive skin, leaving marks in their wake, his large hands slid beneath your shirt, seeking the warmth of your bare skin. Lifting your shirt just above your breasts, he exposed your chest and hardened nipples, his mouth latching onto one and sucking lightly before shifting his attention to the other.

You couldn't suppress a soft moan as you parted your lips, sinking deeper into his spell. Releasing his hair, you reached for the pillow behind your head, closing your eyes gently and spreading your legs a little wider as William slowly trailed his mouth southward.

With a delicate touch, he slipped a couple of fingers beneath the hem of your shorts, gradually pulling them down along with your underwear, leaving you completely exposed to him. Then he knelt back, taking a moment to admire the sight before him.

"Min vackra prinsessa..." William softly breathed out, before leaning in to indulge in his first feast of the day. Gently, he peppered kisses along your inner thighs, occasionally biting down to leave colourful marks. Then, pulling away from your surrendered form, he firmly grasped your thighs and took you by surprise, flipping you over.

"Willy!" you gasped, opening your eyes as he positioned you on all fours, your buttocks fully on display for him.

"Don't worry, baby, you'll get what you want," he grinned seductively from behind you, leaving you intrigued, since he’d never eaten you out like this before.

Once again, you gripped the pillow tightly as you positioned yourself on your knees and elbows, patiently awaiting William's next move, while his palms tenderly caressed your cheeks as you rested your head against the pillow.

"Fuck, I'll never get over this sweet ass," he muttered to himself, grabbing hold of your cheeks, and spreading them slightly wider before allowing a trail of saliva to drip between them. A small shiver ran through your body as the liquid passed over your most intimate area, your anticipation causing your cunt to drip, your body pulsating with the need for further stimulation.

Fortunately, you didn't have to wait much longer. "Oh yes," you moaned as William's mouth made contact with your heat, his skilled tongue eagerly licking up your folds.

With a firm grip on your behind, he held you in place as you squirmed under his touch, whimpering with pleasure at every movement. "Fuck, Willy... it feels so good," you breathed out as he delved deeper, his mouth exploring your heat with expert precision, relishing the taste of your core as he teased your entrance with his tongue.

It was captivating. You closed your eyes once more as the sensation of orgasm slowly began to build within you, your mind spinning with each lick, suck, and talented action that William unleashed upon you. You felt his nose buried deep between your cheeks, his beard brushing against your sensitive skin as he hummed against your core.

William loved the taste of your pussy; it was his favourite meal at any given moment. And the moans he elicited from you were like sweet melodies to him, knowing that he was the one responsible for bringing you such intense pleasure.

And as your legs began to tremble under his touch, he sensed you were nearing climax.

Giving you a moment to catch your breath, he pulled back slightly, a string of your juices connecting his lips to your cunt. "Yeah? Do you like it when I eat your pussy?" he asked, his voice laced with desire.

"Mmm..." you nodded into the pillow, opening your eyes slightly to catch a glimpse of him behind you. "Willy, I need more," you moaned softly, your voice barely audibles above a whisper.

"I know, baby, I'm gonna take care of you," he assured you.

And with a confident smirk, William resumed his earlier actions, increasing the intensity as he sought to bring you to the long-awaited climax. His mouth remained firmly attached to your juicy folds as he slipped an arm between your legs, his fingers finding your clit and circling it skilfully.

"Oh fuck..." you gasped, your fingers clutching the pillow sheets tightly. "Willy..."

Your breath escaped you uncontrollably, knowing it wouldn’t be much longer with William's skilled ministrations. Lost in a blissful haze, you moaned loudly as the orgasm swept through your mind, body, and soul. And your legs shook as you reached the peak, your toes curling and your mouth falling open as the euphoric waves crashed over you.

Slowly descending from your high, you carefully opened your eyes, releasing your grip on the pillow before collapsing onto your stomach. Looking behind you, you met William's grin, the evidence of his efforts glistening in his beard.

"How the fuck are you so good at this?" you chuckled lightly, meeting William as he crawled up to hover over your body, laughter bubbling between you before he captured your lips in a passionate kiss.

"I just want to please you, baby," he chuckled darkly.

"And remind me that only you can do this, making sure I'll miss it while you're away," you added with a raised eyebrow, earning another laugh from the man above you.

"Yeah, maybe that too," he playfully agreed.

For a moment, you simply relished the closeness, savouring every second before you both rose and walked to the bathroom to shower. And there, you naturally took the opportunity to remind William that nobody gave blowjobs like you did; a skill you had mastered to perfection. You took him in fully, working his length with every inch of space you had to offer. And when he released his cum into your mouth, you happily swallowed every single drop, relishing the taste of his salty stickiness.

**

Initially, the idea of giving each other a proper orgasm before parting seemed like a good one, but it ended up making you both miss each other more than expected.

Already later in the evening, after the match against the St. Louis Blues, you had your first video call, satisfying the need to see and hear each other. You shared about your day, working from home to finish up a presentation, in between dog walks and cooking, before watching the match. Which fortunately had been a good one, with the Leafs securing their fourth straight win, they defeated the Blues 4-2.

During the call, William lounged on the bed in his hotel room, his face beaming with happiness as he talked about his goal and performance, while you listened eagerly.

And you had to remind yourself to be grateful for living in a time with smartphones and FaceTime, as William's cheerful face on the screen brightened your evening after a taxing day working on your presentation. And naturally, his smile widened even further when Pablo and Banksy briefly joined in during the video chat.

It was a tender and romantic moment, characterised by the simple longing of two people for each other. Or, as romantic as it could be when every other sentence was a dirty reference to how much you both desired each other. Yet, you kept the conversation sober.

Similarly, the call on the following night was brief. After a long day of travel and several hours of training, William was understandably drained of energy in the evening.

It wasn't until the next evening that things started to heat up, as the Maple Leafs faced off against the Coyotes. Not only did the Leafs emerge victorious, but Auston also made an attempt to score his 50th goal in his childhood state. It was a truly magnificent moment, watching the match alongside the Swedish girlfriends and wives, sharing cheers and joys as the game concluded with a resounding 6-3 victory for the Leafs.

However, despite the amazing result of the game, it wasn’t entirely flawless.

William received two penalties during the match, and there was a fair amount of fighting among the players, including your usually composed boyfriend. 

And as you watched your boyfriend assert his dominance on the ice, using his strength to push other players, you couldn't help but hold your breath. Among the other ladies, you discreetly clenched your thighs together, cursing under your breath as arousal stirred within you.

Watching William fight was undeniably hot.

While William sat in the penalty box, serving his time for his crime, your mind wandered to the ways you could "punish" him for being a bad boy.

The idea of having sex in the penalty box briefly crossed your mind, but you quickly dismissed it as the match continued.

Yet as soon as you returned home, you found yourself in a video call with William, both of you in bed. You praised him for scoring two goals, including one on a breakaway coming out of the penalty box. However, discussing the penalty reminded you of something else.

You recalled a time after a loss in Toronto when you had teased William about finishing late, joining him in the locker room post-game. You’d playfully joked about how he needed punishment for getting a penalty, which led to some rather intimate moments in the semi-public space.

Your cheeks flushed at the memory, but what made you blush even more was the recollection of Auston walking in on you, with William half in his gear and you straddling him, his cock buried deep inside you, both of you reaching climax.

Just thinking about those actions turned you on, but what got you even more excited was seeing William on the call wearing nothing but his boxers.

"You know, babe," you chuckled lightly. "You were a naughty boy today."

William simply flashed you a grin in response. "What can I say, sometimes I just need to let it out."

"And you definitely did – enough to earn you two penalties," you playfully reminded him.

"It was uncalled for," William tried to defend, though you both knew the truth.

"Oh, Willy, you deserved it, and you know it! Besides, seeing you in the penalty box was actually a bit of a turn on..."

"Yeah, you liked what you saw?" he spoke mischievously.

"Oh, you have no idea… watching you get angry like that was so hot!"

"You just liked to see me get punished, didn’t you?" he chuckled darkly.

And you had to admit, you did. "Maybe… at least how I recall it, we agreed that you should get punished for every time you got a penalty," you grinned with a sensual tone.

"I don’t remember agreeing on that, babe," William let out a deep breath, as he pondered how to express his true thoughts. "But… if you were to punish me right now, what would you do?"

Slightly taken aback by William’s naughty question, you offered him a cheeky smirk. Then, biting down on your lower lip, you considered your response.

"Well…" you softly began. "First, I’d tell you that I’m on our bed… in nothing but your t-shirt…"

"No panties?" he inquired curiously, prompting you to shake your head.

It wasn’t entirely a coincidence. Knowing you’d likely be incredibly turned on after talking to William, you had come prepared to indulge in some solo stimulation. However, now you were more than happy to let William join in the fun.

"Nope..."

"No bra?"

Again, you shook your head. "Just almost naked… just for me to enjoy."

William could feel himself growing firmer just by the mere thought of you naked, his hand gently cupping his crotch over his boxers.

"And then?" He inquired with a low tone of voice, encouraging you to continue.

"And then, I’d let you know that I’m gently touching my thighs… tracing over the marks you’ve left, making sure to remind me that I’m taken," you told him, maintaining a seductive tone as you caressed your skin softly. "And slowly, I’m moving my fingers closer to my pussy - my needy pussy that misses you so much…"

"Oh, I miss your pussy as well, baby," William let out a deep grunt, stroking his hardening member through the fabric as he envisioned touching your figure, recalling the warmth and the sweet taste of your honey.

You knew this wasn’t an actual punishment for William, yet you understood it held a small level of torture, knowing he was aroused, yet unable to touch you.

Meanwhile, you guided your fingers closer to your core, dreaming about William’s touch and how good he made you feel. Already more than wet and turned on after watching the match, you gently repositioned to recline entirely on your back, offering yourself better access with widespread legs, holding your phone above your head.

"She's so needy, Willy," you flashed him another smirk. "So wet and ready… she wishes you were here to take care of her…"

"Mmm, baby, I'd wish I was there too," William smoothly lowered his boxers, freeing his cock before giving it a few strokes. "Tell me what you're thinking about, baby. What's on your mind while you touch yourself?" His tone was low and husky, reminiscent of when he whispered sweet nothings to you.

"Mmm," you slowly began, recalling his actions from earlier, letting your fingers slide up and down your moist folds. "I'm thinking about you… on the ice… when you got into that fight," you hummed seductively, glancing at your screen to gauge his reaction. Admitting your desire made you feel a little embarrassed, but you knew there was no need to feel that way with William.

"Oh, you liked me being rough?" He inquired with a grin, his firm grip on his cock guiding his skin back and forth.

"Mmm… I'd want you to be rough with me… take me to the penalty box and punish me…" you admitted seductively as you circled your clit.

"Oh yeah, baby, you're such a bad girl… you need me to show you who's in charge…" William softly moaned along.

"Mmm… I'd want you to fuck me so hard and good that I'll forget my own name…"

It was almost too hot for both of you to continue speaking, your moans interrupting as you both stimulated yourselves.

"Yes, baby, I'd take you so good… fucking that tight little pussy of yours as you scream my name…"

You slowly increased the intensity of your fingers, feeling your orgasm slowly taking form and causing a pleasurable rush in your body. And William too increased the speed of his strokes, feeling the growing need to push himself closer to his release.

"Are you getting close, baby?" he asked huskily, earning a small nod from you. "Then make yourself come for me…"

His command turned you on even more, causing you to increase the speed of your fingers again, pushing yourself closer to the peak of an orgasm. "Yes… Willy, yes…" you breathed out, your heels digging into the mattress beneath you. 

"That’s it, baby… show me you’re a good girl and come for me…"

And with those words, you arched your back and surrendered to the rush of pleasure, losing yourself in the climax.

"Oh, fuck, baby, that was so hot…" William breathed out, increasing his own speed as he too felt his climax approaching. "Show me how good you feel…"

Still trying to catch your breath, you repositioned, moving the camera to put your dripping cunt on full display for him. Then, gently pulling your moist lips apart, you showed him the juices caused by your actions. "You like it when I do this?"

"Mmm, yes, that’s my pretty girl… now I want you to stick your fingers inside, baby," he commanded again, and you obliged with a satisfied smile. Easing your two fingers into your heat, you felt your muscles wrap around them, stimulating your walls as you pulled them in and out.

"Oh, Willy…" you let out a soft moan. "I wish it was your cock filling me up."

"Me too, baby… me too," William let out a deep grunt. "Fuck, I wish I could feel your tight cunt around my cock… it's so needy for you," he continued, his climax approaching as he stroked his length rapidly. "Mmm… I’m so close, baby… Shit, I wish I could come inside you…"

Still with your fingers pumping between your legs, you felt the need to hear him reach his peak. "Are you gonna come for me, Willy?"

“Yes, baby… I’m gonna-“ and with a deep grunt, William let his climax take over, shooting his cum onto his lower stomach as he reached his peak. And as a small final reward, you pulled out your fingers and guided them to your mouth, looking seductively into the camera as you licked them clean. 

"Fuck…" William spoke deeply, trying to catch his breath as he watched you. "I miss the taste of you…"

“I miss having your mouth on my cunt as well, baby,” you chuckled lightly, flashing him a satisfied smirk.

There was a short moment where you both just enjoyed the distant intimacy, though you also felt a deep longing for each other’s real touch. But then William broke the comfortable silence.

“I’m just gonna clean up quickly, baby… I’ll be right back.” And in just a few minutes, William returned with a grin plastered on his handsome face. “So, the penalty box huh?” he inquired with a chuckle. “A new fantasy of yours?”

Feeling your cheeks flush, you couldn’t help but feel a little embarrassed about your confession. “Maybe…” you admitted softly. “I don’t know why… it was just from seeing the match tonight – it was so hot…”

“You don’t need to explain, baby,” William chuckled once more. “I just like it when you share your fantasies.”

“I know it might not be possible… but yeah, that’s probably something new that could be fun to try,” you admitted with a sweet smile, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

But William simply chuckled. “Never say never, älskling.”

And those words lingered in your mind all evening after you’d ended the call. You even had to take out your Magic Wand and stimulate yourself to another orgasm as you imagined the scenario in the penalty box. Letting out a loud moan as you reached your peak, you couldn’t help but smile a little as you saw the results. Snapping a quick photo, you sent it to William, showing him the wet patch of your juices soaking the sheets from the little evening session.

**

As day four of the road trip rolled around, you did your best to keep your mind occupied throughout the day, ensuring you wouldn’t be thinking about William every second. And luckily, the presentation at work seemed to do just the trick.

Though it was a busy day filled with meetings and presentations, it also seemed to fly by quickly. You enjoyed a lovely lunch with some of your co-workers, and before long, the day was over, and you were swiftly back at the condo, walking the dogs and settling in for the evening’s match in Vegas.

And what an incredible game it was. Goal after goal, the Leafs dominated the match, ultimately concluding with a score of 7-3 on the Golden Knights’ home turf.

Yet, what really had your mind spinning that night were the photos of William walking from the bus in his lilac suit. A suit you absolutely adored on him, paired with his loose white shirt, stylish trainers, and his effortlessly casual expression. You were almost envious of the water bottle in his hand, knowing the talents he held with those hands.

To your joy, the boys had the chance to stay the night in Vegas before their travel day to Colorado the next day. Though they all spent some ‘guy time’ to celebrate the win and the six-game winning streak after the match, William later made an effort to sneak off to call you. The very explicit photo you’d sent with the little diamond butt plug settled in your ass had him feeling a primal need for release. Besides, Calle had to have a phone call with the family anyway.

So, standing in the hotel room bathroom, one hand supporting himself on the counter, William stroked his length with firm motions. 

"That's it, baby, let me see your wet pussy..." he grunted deeply, sensing the climax building inside as you adjusted the camera to give him the best view of your core.

"Oh, Willy, yes..." you moaned loudly, pressing the vibrator against your clit, sending intense vibrations through your body, making you squirm as your orgasm approached.

It had been 7 minutes of pure pleasure, with drenched sheets and moans echoing through the phones. Your vision blurred as the butt plug stimulated you, combined with the intense sensations from the vibrator.

"Yes, baby, I want you to come... Mmm... I'm going to as well..." William let out a deep grunt, and as his request became your command, you let out a deep moan as you reached the peak, letting your juices squirt all over the mattress beneath you.

Meanwhile, William jerked himself to release his load, the force causing it to land on his torso, sticking in his lower chest hair.

It felt so dirty and thrilling at the same time. The way you and William could share such intimate moments amidst heartfelt conversations was truly remarkable. It embodied the perfect balance of what a healthy relationship should entail.

And after the intense mutual masturbation session, you found yourselves back to conversing.

"So, was it the penalty box thing again that had to be turned on?" William chuckled lightly as you’d both cleaned up after your post-orgasmic explorations.

"Actually... it was the suit today," you admitted with a sweet smile, snuggling up on his side of the bed. Partly because your side was still damp from your juices, but also so you could fully immerse yourself in his masculine scent that you had missed so much.

"Oh, I think I need to wear that suit more often then," he grinned, satisfaction evident in his smirk.

"Nah, don’t do that, Willy," you playfully objected. "I like that you don’t wear it too often – makes it special," you smiled. "Besides, I don’t know if my bum can handle so much of this."

"Oh, I think we both know your ass can handle a lot more than that, baby," William cocked an eyebrow.

"Hmm... you’re right, maybe I just need your assistance then," you offered a seductive wink, prompting William to let out a deep disappointed sigh.

"Shit, don’t talk about your ass like that... I’m getting hard here, and Calle could be back any moment..." 

"Well, in that case, I’ll just hang up and go back to pleasuring myself while you enjoy your night with the lads," you playfully teased.

"Oh, you’re in for it when I get back," William grinned darkly.

"Can’t wait."

And after a few more minutes, you both agreed to end the call.

**

Friday turned out to be another day that passed by quicker than expected. With the team's schedule filled with travel and training, you opted for a relaxed evening out with some colleagues. Over dinner and a few drinks, you shared genuine laughter, joked about everything and nothing, while catching up on all the gossip.

One of your colleagues, a few years your senior, was planning for baby number two, while another girl around your age was deep into planning her wedding, having been engaged for just over a year now and aiming for a summer ceremony. The third colleague, several years older and divorced, was embracing her single life phase.

The three of them had become your trusted confidantes for anything when you needed to escape from the hockey world, besides Emily, and they were more than happy to provide entertainment. However, occasionally they could be a bit nosy about your relationship, which you didn't mind. They were the only ones you'd share details about you and William with, knowing you could trust them completely.

"Oh, come on, y/n... this is girls' night, we need the gossip!"

"Yeah, spill the beans, how is he in bed?"

You had to bite your tongue to avoid spilling all the details, knowing you could easily share every little thought proudly. Yet, you kept it classy.

"Well, let’s just say that his performance on the ice... matches his skills in bed," you playfully remarked, eliciting screams and giggles from your friends.

It was refreshing to spend time away from the arena, although as much as you enjoyed sharing intimate moments with your boyfriend through video calls, it also meant being cautious in public. 

It was no secret that William could be a bit possessive and jealous when other men showed interest in you, so when a small group of guys suddenly tried to flirt with all of you, you did your best to politely decline their advances.

And fortunately, the situation didn't escalate into drama. However, the game against the Avalanches the following night did.

Colorado took the lead with two goals within the first 12 minutes of the first period. But with some birthday luck, Bertuzzi managed to claw one back, bringing the score to 2-1 by the end of the period.

And to everyone's relief, the Leafs dominated the second period, skating over the Avalanches and bringing the score back to 3-2, with Bertuzzi benefiting from some birthday luck and Mitchy weaving through players as if they weren't even there. And as the cherry on top, despite Colorado managing to score another goal within 5 minutes of the third period, Bert secured the final score of the match with a hat-trick.

It was an exhilarating game to watch, which you did alongside some of the other wives and girlfriends, a tradition you had established by now for Saturday games. These occasions meant girls' dinners and discussions about the highs and lows of being with the players.

However, what stood out the most was that despite the exciting win, William wasn't in the mood for much conversation that evening. At first, you couldn't understand why. He had seemed so happy during the game. Then you rationalised that despite his three assists, he was probably feeling a bit down about not scoring any goals himself.

And you knew better than to push him. William was usually calm and laid-back, and you understood that even though he never dwelled on such things, he sometimes just needed space and time with the boys to celebrate the positives.

Yet as Sunday rolled around and the boys were back in Toronto, your day didn't turn out quite as expected.

Around four AM, you heard William come home, quietly making his way to the bedroom, and slipping under the covers beside you. However, instead of his usual playful greeting after returning from a road trip, he simply drifted off to sleep within minutes.

You reasoned that he must have been exhausted from the journey, yet the next morning, after taking the dogs for a jog and grabbing something to eat, you returned home to find the apartment empty. The clock read 11:30, and you assumed William would still be in bed. However, a single text from him informed you that he was at the training rink with a few of the guys.

You couldn't help but feel a pang of hurt. It was unlike him, and truthfully, you had no idea why he was behaving this way. That is until you stepped out of a long, refreshing shower and saw the message from Stephanie.

It was a short online article from one of Toronto's best gossip sites: "Apparently, a hockey star just isn't enough!" Accompanied by a photo of one of the guys from the other night, leaning in to chat with you. It wasn't a revealing photo at all. It simply showed you smiling as you politely declined the man's offer. Yet, you had a sinking feeling that the headline might have triggered something in your boyfriend.

"Shit..." you muttered to yourself.

Of course, this had to happen. You couldn’t even go out for a drink and dinner with a few girlfriends without someone stirring up unnecessary drama. Despite the many conversations you'd had with William about it, it seemed like it could still cause issues.

"Hey, y/n... don’t worry about it... it's just a couple of jealous women who can't accept that Willy's in a happy relationship," Stephanie tried to comfort you over the phone as you drove to meet William by the rink.

You had waited a while to take any action, not wanting to escalate things, but when you hadn’t heard from him all day and saw snaps of the other boys at home, you knew you had to do something.

"I know, it's just... it's Willy, you know how he can be..."

"I know, y/n... and I wish people could just leave us alone and let us be happy. But Willy is a great hockey player, and he's been getting a lot of media attention lately, so I'm sorry this is happening to you..."

The girls were always incredibly supportive and sweet. Even those who knew they didn't face the same challenges, as not all players received the same level of media attention. Yet you couldn't shake off the feeling entirely.

William wasn’t even a proper celebrity, you reasoned with yourself as you ended the call and made your way through the streets. He was just a guy who played the sport he loved, and with skill and hard work, he'd managed to reach a level where he earned really good money. However, with the internet being what it is, it seemed like just about anyone could become famous.

Then upon reaching the rink, you took a deep breath before going in. As expected, William was the only one on the ice, taking shots at an empty net.

Lost in his own world, he didn’t even notice you arriving. Not until he took a particularly hard shot, missed the goal, and the puck rebounded, causing him to turn around in frustration. That's when he caught sight of your face.

There was a brief moment of silence as you slowly walked over to the boards, hands in your pockets as you watched William's actions. But he didn’t say anything. He simply skated slowly towards you, wearing a defeated expression.

"Hey," you said softly, breaking the silence.

"Hey," he replied curtly.

You had to wait a few more seconds before you could truly speak your mind, giving him some time to respond. But he remained silent.

"Willy, we can't keep going like this… you can't shut me out when something's wrong," you urged.

William understood your implication, but he didn't have a clever comeback ready.

"Talk to me, babe," you gently encouraged. "Tell me what's on your mind." But William remained silent, his eyes darting around, his mouth moving as if he were pondering. So, you decided to delve a little deeper. "Is it the article?"

And that seemed to open the floodgates.

"Yes… and no," William replied simply, releasing a deep sigh.

"Meaning…"

Taking a deep breath, William shifted his stance slightly as he faced you. "I just… I hate seeing you happy without me," he confessed, feeling the weight of his words.

"Oh… wait, what are you saying?" you asked, feeling a bit bewildered.

"Don't get me wrong… all I want is for you to be happy, but…" William sighed again. "Seeing you happy with other girls, not from the team… it just makes me afraid that you don't want this life," he admitted hastily, his words spilling out as you sensed his struggle to voice his thoughts.

"Wait... so it's not about the guy in the photo?" you asked, feeling a bit surprised by what he had revealed.

But William simply shook his head, furrowing his brow slightly. "Fuck no... Babe, I trust you, and I know no other man is as right for you as I am," he spoke with conviction, something he had come to realise after numerous fights stemming from jealousy.

"Then what is it? Because I don’t really understand how me being happy with my friends can piss you off like that."

"I just... I'm so fucking in love with you, and it terrifies me, because I've never felt like this with anyone before... And even though I know you wouldn't leave, I can't shake the thought that if you don't want this lifestyle or me anymore, you'd just walk away," he confessed, his voice heavy with emotion.

You had to hold your breath for a moment, completely stunned by his words, as he let out a deep breath, his eyes avoiding yours. Although it wasn’t the first time William had voiced his fears about you not wanting to be with him, you were always taken aback each time it surfaced.

"Hey..." you spoke softly, taking a step closer, gently cupping his sweaty jaw to make him look at you. "First of all, I would never leave you without a very, very good reason... and not just because I grew tired of the NHL lifestyle," you said firmly, locking eyes with his intense gaze. "Secondly, it's okay for you to feel this way," you tried to offer him a reassuring smile. "It's completely normal in a relationship, but you can't shut me out and avoid talking to me... You have to share things like this."

The moment was tender between you as you stood by the hockey rink, alone.

Letting out a sigh, William nodded gently. "I know... I'm just not very good at it," he timidly admitted, attempting a smile.

"Me neither..." you smiled back. "But we just have to practice, so we don't let each other down."

And with a half chuckle, William nodded again. "How are you so amazing?" he then tossed his stick and gloves over the board and reached around you to pull you close. Despite the lower level of the ice, William in his skates was still slightly taller than you. "Seriously, I panic, and you're all rational," he joked playfully.

"It's called balance, baby," you chuckled, wrapping your hands around his neck before pushing off his helmet to reveal his sweaty face. "I guess it's just how we complement each other – you're inexperienced in love, and I teach you about deep feelings, while you teach me about... sexual things," you explained cheekily, leaning in closer so you could almost feel his breath.

"Mmm... speaking of which..." William licked his lips as his eyes darkened slightly. "Now that I think about it, you still need to punish me for all those penalties I got on the road," he said seductively, his voice husky. "And if I'm not wrong, we're in a rink... with a penalty box, just over there... all by ourselves."

You were taken aback by his suggestion, yet you couldn't deny how turned on you suddenly felt. It was naughty. Yet so tempting.

"Willy, we really can’t... do that here," you whispered, but deep down, you knew you didn't want to listen to your own words.

"Well, why don't we find out?" he suggested with a mischievous grin. And with a light giggle, you bit your lower lip and nodded before he firmly held onto you, lifting you over the barrier prompting you to wrap your legs around him.

With a wide smile on his face, William turned on his skates and began to glide towards the penalty box, quickly confirming that there was still no one around. Upon entering, he settled you down, both of you giggling like teenagers about to experience something new.

But any lingering concerns vanished as William sat on the bench, pulling you into his lap and connecting your lips in a passionate kiss. Your hands eagerly found his hair to tug at it as you relished the taste of him, your tongues dancing in a heated embrace.

"Shit, I've missed you, baby," William murmured between breaths before pressing his lips against yours again, his hands firmly gripping your hips.

Despite the chill of the rink, you discarded your jacket and shirt, leaving you in your bra, with William's body pressed against yours to keep you warm.

"Fucking missed you too, Willy," you breathed out, feeling the air stolen from your lungs as you deepened the kiss. The hunger between you was palpable, and neither of you could wait any longer to feel each other's warmth.

Hands eagerly explored each other, and thankfully William hadn't donned full gear for the casual training session, leaving only a few items to remove to get closer to what you both desired most.

Still, it was somewhat clumsy and messy as you moved around in the box. You couldn't help but smile and chuckle whenever you broke apart to shed a piece of clothing. William fumbled with your jeans, and you had to help him pull them off. Meanwhile, William lowered his own sweats, leaving him still in skates and his training jersey – likely a peculiar sight.

But with a bit of manoeuvring, you eventually found yourselves in a comfortable position again, with you wearing nothing but your bra as you stroke William's hardening cock. Simultaneously, he buried two fingers inside you, stretching your entrance in anticipation.

Though you tried to stifle your noises, moans filled the space around you, echoing through the hall as you brought each other pleasure. "So wet for me, baby," William muttered under his breath. "I need to be inside you..."

William was impatient. He had longed for your body for too long, and finally, he was about to have you close again. So, without waiting for your response, he guided you to release his throbbing cock, positioning himself at your entrance. And with a controlled motion, you allowed yourself to sink down onto him, his shaft filling you up as you let out a satisfied moan.

"Oh, fuck..."

It felt like something straight out of your fantasies. Although William wasn't in the middle of a penalty because of a fight, the situation was still incredibly arousing.

With a steady rhythm, you rocked your hips, allowing his length to slide in and out of your wet heat, stimulating every inch of your walls.

"You feel so good around me," William moaned between sloppy kisses, his hands still firmly on your hips as he guided your movements.

And before long, the desire to speed up overwhelmed both of you. You couldn't even keep your lips attached to his as you increased your motions, passionately riding him as you felt the climax slowly approaching.

Then as he heard your small whimpers escaping, your breathing uncontrolled and your walls eagerly clenching, William knew you were nearing orgasm. So, he moved a hand to find your clit, circling it with forceful motions.

"Mmm, yes, Willy... feels so good," you cried out in a moan, slamming your hips against his as you pushed yourself closer to the edge with William's cock deep inside you.

"Come for me," William muttered encouragingly. "Be a good girl and come for me."

And as always, his words acted as a command to your body, causing you to arch your back, his name slipping off your lips as you tossed your head back, eyes shut tight and a loud moan escaping you.

It was an intense orgasm that coursed through every single cell in your body, your mind enveloped in a blissful haze as your body surrendered to the pleasure. Then slowly coming down from the high, you opened your eyes again to meet William's satisfied smirk.

"So hot," he simply muttered before he held onto your ass and rose from his seat. Taking a few steps forward, he pressed you up against the glass and began to thrust his cock inside you. His hands held you in place as he picked up a steady pace.

It was almost rough as William took charge, his pounding showing no mercy as the sounds echoed loudly through the rink.

You tried to contain your cries as your boyfriend fucked you senseless, just like you'd fantasised about. Yet the tears rolling down your cheeks were nothing but tears of pleasure. The way he overstimulated your walls with every hard thrust had you seeing stars, and you could barely even announce your next orgasm approaching. Your throat was rendered wordless by the heated sex, and you simply formed a smile on your lips as you moaned William's name.

"Fuck yes, baby," William moaned as he too felt his climax about to peak, increasing his speed and force, hitting the very back of your insides. Your hands firmly gripped onto his hair, and as you locked eyes in a passionate glance, he let out a deep grunt as he spilled his cum into you.

Standing still in the position, you both needed a moment to catch your breath. It was more than just hot. It was mind-blowingly sexy as you reached climax. And with smiles gracing your lips, you shared a heartfelt moment, still with William's cock buried inside your dripping cunt, you kissed him softly.

"I love you so much," you spoke timidly, your eyes locked onto his as you felt your core pulsating around his member.

"I love you too, älskling…"

Despite the rough sex, it was a soft and romantic moment. Yet as you both felt comfortable in the silence hanging between you, your heartfelt moment was suddenly interrupted by a voice from across the ice.

"Hey! What are you two doing?"

"Shit…" you both giggled as you swiftly disentangled yourselves, rushing to put on clothes. But you knew there was no way to deny what had just happened. With laughter and flushed cheeks, you managed to make your way back to the other side of the ice where you apologised to the maintenance worker before heading to the locker room, where William gathered his things.

"Let's go home, prinsessa," he simply spoke with a smirk, placing a soft kiss on your temple.

#18+ #Inexperienced!reader x Willy #SlutsforPresidentNylander #wn88 imagine #william nylander imagine #nhl smut #william nylander smut #nhl hockey imagine #toronto maple leafs imagine

[homunculus-argument]

I try to go out of my way to let people know if I like something that they're doing, because people don't really notice the good things of themselves or aren't aware that other people notice. Or occasionally, they might not be aware that something about them that they're not observing is a positive thing. It reflects and bounces back and forth, and we all need some random positivity around.

Made a post a while ago about this guy whom I met through my publisher, whose name I had honestly forgotten/missed completely, wanting to note down how this dude made me see just how much the southern US kind of rural "redneck" stereotype that I'd only seen depicted - largely in a negative, classist light - really is rooted in a genuine type of people, who not only exist, but are just the same type of people as my mother's side of the family in rural Finland. And that weren't for the complete language barrier between people who don't speak a word of english, and people who don't speak a word of finnish, they'd have much to talk about - more in common than I really do with either of them.

What I hadn't expected were a few people tagging the post as "gender goals" - I honestly hadn't even thought of this cultural observation from a gender presentation point of view - but I thought that he himself might find this amusing. After sending my publishers the initial message I realised that wait shit, they're all late millenial bordering-on-gen-X cis guys, I'll need to translate this. I started going into what the hell any of that even means, explaining the concept of transition goals, of how trans people go about gathering inspiration of just what kind of men/women/nb they want to be, and taking notes of the kind of gender presentation they personally like.

Typing it out, I kind of started also getting a clearer picture of how much of a significance that kind of thing can have, even when remarked half-jokingly. Of what I put together, this guy has been in kind of a rough patch in life - freshly divorced after getting married too young, he's been up in the air in his mid-30s trying to figure out how to build up a life in his own image as an independent adult, after marrying his high school sweetheart wasn't Happily Ever After after all.

So maybe he would like to know that there's people on the internet who are trying to figure out how to present themselves, and what kind of a man they want to be, who read my rough description of my impression of him - that I wrote without thinking much more about it at all - and thought "I like what this guy is doing. This is what I'd like for myself."

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for being upset at how my former friends treated me?

tw: suicide and animal death

So for some context this was a very close knit friendgroup, for several years, of about 10 people, including me and my then partner. Also, everyone here is an adult.

Basically, one day I was in a really really bad place mentally. A beloved family pet was going to be put down soon, this dog had been a part of my life for almost half my life, and I was inconsolable and struggling to cope with this. During a discussion about some random interest I got too mean/harsh about it and it turned into an argument.

I know this was not justified and my grief wasn't an excuse, and I knew it then too and apologized to the people involved, and was met with overwhelming support, I was told "it's ok, we understand you're going through a rough thing right now, we're here to support you and you'll always have a place in this group"

Then my partner messaged me. They had not been part of the discussion at all, but they told me they felt hurt and wanted us to take a break. However, I misinterpreted that as a break up (combination of language barrier and me already being in shambles. This miscommunication is not something my ex can be blamed for)

This was an extremely serious relationship, we had been together for 2 years at that point and had a lot of future plans and such, so that on top of already grieving made me have a mental breakdown.

So, I vented on my personal tumblr. My vents did not mention/vague/allude to the situation at all, they amounted to "I feel terrible I can't do this anymore" and could very well have been only about my dog, or just about my depression in general. I also should point out that my ex doesn't use tumblr at all, so I didn't think he'd ever see those vents, and I certainly didn't want him to. And I also would not have reacted like that if I had known it was a temporary break. I know I still shouldn't have vented on a public blog, and it was hurtful no matter what. I wasn't thinking clearly at the time.

The next day, after our dog was put down, I sought support from my friends, but was suddenly met with "we're not impressed with how you've acted, get therapy, bye" and was kicked from the group. Several of them blocked me everywhere instantly.

Unbeknownst to me, someone had sent my vents to my ex and they had shown them to the others, and they'd drawn the conclusion that I was upset about a temporary break and was venting to try to guilt my ex into getting back with me. And not a single one of them brought this up to me. Again, we'd all been friends for several years at that point and this was literally the day after telling me I'd always be a part of the group and they were here for me. I couldn't even defend myself because no one would tell me anything, I asked many times but was told "you know what you did" even though I clearly didn't. I thought they'd all changed their minds about the previous day out of nowhere, or that this was because of (what I thought was) the breakup. I only learned what they actually thought much later. Oh, and my ex told me I needed therapy and he never wanted anything to do with me again (which is when I learned I'd been wrong about the breakup).

Again, I know me venting was harmful no matter what, so in that regard I am the asshole, but I still feel like there's a difference between what I did and deliberate manipulation, and surely people I'd been friends with for years could have spoken to me before assuming things?

So at that point I'd lost a beloved pet, my partner, and most of my close friends, within a day. So at that point I tried but failed to commit suicide, and was hospitalized.

While in the hospital, I didn't get a single word from any of my friends, except for one person. Supposedly, everyone had been "worried out of their minds" when they saw my suicide note. But not worried enough for a single word.

Even the one person who talked to me got extremely defensive and angry if I so much as implied I felt hurt by the group's actions. They even tried to hold it over my head how "despite everything you did X and Y were super worried about you" as if being worried about someone comitting suicide is some kind of heroic saint.

I asked to be allowed to talk things out with them, but was told "the others aren't comfortable associating with you", so I had to write a fucking google doc letter. I explained the situation from my perspective, apologized for my actions etc, but also made it clear that I felt hurt and didn't think their reaction was justified and that they should have at least talked to me first, and that I was very open to talking things out in person if any of them wanted to get back to me.

None of them did. Apparently they were writing a formal collective response letter to me. At which point I had enough of the silent treatment and said that if any of them had anything to say to me they could do so in person. Which made the group extremely angry because I was "silencing" them.

About three people got back to me, and all of their responses amounted to "we don't owe you an apology, our actions were justified because we thought you'd done something bad and we were just trying to protect [my ex] and the fact that you're upset about it proves you are bad" one of them compared me to their abuser.

They also said they'd been "having issues with my behavior for a long time now", I wish I could elaborate here in case it'd impact judgement, but I can't because none of them specified, and NOTHING of the sort had been brought up to me previously.

So. Again, I know I am the asshole to some extent, because regardless of my mindset me venting on my tumblr was still harmful, but I also feel like I was treated unfairly and cruelly by my former friends. AITA here?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #suicide cw

[alexawynters]

Scarlet Whispers pt 10

Gif not mine, as always

Trigger Warnings: Some gore and violence.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Female!Reader

Rating: M. Minors DNI

Masterlist with parts 1-9 here

Chapter Ten

A/N: I Googled the recipe for authentic Hungarian Chicken Paprikash in order to see how difficult it might actually be to make, and as someone who can’t cook but three things, I have to say it looks hella complicated. I’m giving Reader far more credit than I would ever give myself with regards to kitchen skills.. That said it sounds delicious and now I want it :’(  Someone pls feed me. Also I felt super bad that I went so long without posting when I had this just… sitting in my Google Docs, so uh… have another chapter. I only have 12 written so far though so I guess I better get to steppin’. sweats nervously

The pair of you had elected on a movie marathon today, watching the Hobbit series together on the couch when Wanda felt it. That telltale tingle in the back of her mind, signaling that her wards had been tripped. This wasn’t the alarm for a breach, but rather letting her know that someone was at the perimeter attempting to get in. Pearly teeth grit in rage - how dare someone ruin her perfectly good afternoon with you? Everything was coming together, and now someone had the audacity to try and intrude, possibly to try and take you away from her? Wanda couldn’t have that.

Pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, the redhead informed you she needed to check on one of her projects and it might be a while. Your pout was quickly kissed away, Wanda directing you to play the new video game she had gotten you last month. Unintentionally, you had been putting it off - between spending time with Wanda and trying to play all the other video games you had, there hadn’t been much time for it. Excitedly, you agreed, getting the disc ready before putting it in the console, as Wanda stepped away. Sure it would be better with the woman by your side, but you could be patient while she worked on her projects. 

Or at least, you would try to be. Healthy relationships and all, you had to be able to spend time apart, and you certainly spent enough time together even if secretly your selfish heart thought not enough.

Out of your view and satisfied you were preoccupied for the foreseeable future, the witch conjured her battle regalia, and stepped through a portal to the ground's perimeter. From the moment she stepped through, the cause of the alarm became readily apparent - Stephen Strange stood just beyond the barrier looking smarmy as ever.

Wanda was getting really sick of that stupid goatee.

“Stephen,” Wanda said, calmly, “How did you find me?” She asked, but she didn’t truly care, the how didn’t really matter.

”America didn’t sell you out, if that’s what you’re asking. The trail of death and destruction you’d left pointed me in the right direction. It took a while but eventually I found where you've been hiding, as you had to know I would.”

The witch hummed noncommittally. “I’m just trying to get my family back, Stephen. You of all people should understand that. I’ve seen what you have done to try and reunite with Christine. Can you blame me for wanting to be happy? Why do you get to choose the reality we all must live in, but when I try to make a life for myself, I’m labeled a villain?”

Strange knew there was some truth to her words, but he was never one to back down. “The family you had wasn’t real, Wanda. They never wer-”

“They were real to me!” The witch seethed, cutting him off.

“In almost every other universe, we are together and happy. If I have to go through you to make that happen, I will. To you they aren’t real, but to me they are my family, and I would burn every universe for them.” Red eyes blazed in rage, and Stephen had no doubt the Scarlet Witch meant her words.

Nevertheless, the sorcerer had no patience for empathizing with his former colleague. There was an innocent person in her grasp and it was his duty to save them. “You have to let her go, Wanda. You can’t hold her against her will like this.”

A sinister chuckle. “Against her will? Does she look like she’s being held against her will?”

With a flick of her stained fingers, and a hazy one-way portal appeared off to the side of them, showing where you were currently engrossed in playing your new video game: Baldur’s Gate 3. From there the scene changed to the recent dates you both had been going on, and how happy you were spending time together, focusing on just how enamored you looked gazing up at Wanda. Another twitch of ink-tinged digits, and the images were gone.

The sorcerer had to admit you didn’t look unhappy, but that didn’t mean all was as it seemed. He knew there was no way she had come clean to you about everything she had done to get you here. If she had, surely you would have run for the hills by now, or at least attempted to. Things wouldn’t be so rosy for you if he left you in her care, Stephen was certain.

“Be that as it may, this Y/N doesn’t belong with you. You decimated entire universes in your search for her, leaving countless innocents dead in your wake. Does she know that? Does she know that you murdered her parents in this universe?” He asked, knowing full well the answer.

His words stung, Wanda knowing that some part of him was right in this instance. No, she hadn’t told you, and initially she had never intended to. As she had gotten closer to you though, Wanda realized she wanted you to know. Not to hurt you, but to solidify that she would always keep you safe from any harm, no matter who it was. She loved you, truly, and wanted you to know everything about her. However, she couldn’t risk that until she was sure your heart wouldn’t turn away from her with the knowledge she revealed.

“They were abusing her, Stephen! In your infinite wisdom, did you know that? Do you know the life she led before me? I’m not her captor, Strange, I saved her! Here she is happy, and I provide her with everything she could ever want or need. Taking that away from her for the sake of your pitiful morality and duty, that would be the real crime. Y/N deserves to be loved, to be happy, and so do I. Don’t take that from us.”

Strange knew he couldn’t win on logic alone. This would undoubtedly end in another showdown, but he was hoping he could reason with the witch. “It’s not just about rescuing her from your clutches, Wanda. You have caused real harm to the multiverse. Untold suffering, trillions annihilated for your selfish obsession. You have to be stopped, Wanda. What’s to prevent you from killing Y/N when she doesn’t fall in line like you want? What will you do then, toss her body aside like so many other innocent people, tearing through countless more universes to find another copy? When will it stop?”

“I would never hurt her!” the redhead snaps, her magic flaring out in warning. She was blatantly ignoring the fact that not long ago she was chasing you through a forest in the fear and anger that you were leaving her. Even then though, she had never planned to hurt you, certainly not kill you. Only to teach you a lesson. Wanda deeply resented that Stephen thought she would ever purposely hurt you. Not to any lasting degree at any rate. She loved you. You were her everything, the key to her happiness.

The witch took a steadying breath, calming herself. She had to think of you first, and she didn’t want to risk a battle so close to her home with you in it. “I have no intention of leaving this universe ever again, Stephen. I can’t say that I am sorry for what I did - it has brought me here with Y/N. But we are happy here, and unless someone comes along to threaten my family, I otherwise have no need to ever harm anyone ever again.”

She paused to look Strange in the eyes, trying to convey her sincerity. “Please Stephen, just go. Leave us in peace. This doesn’t have to be a fight. I’m so… tired… of fighting, Strange, but I want to be clear: I will never give up what is mine. I will neutralize any threat to her, or her happiness, and that includes you.”

The sorcerer couldn’t deny that Wanda looked every bit as exhausted as she suggested at this moment. Unfortunately, he still couldn’t allow the greatest threat to the multiverse that’s ever existed to continue free. Stephen believed that Wanda believed she wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, but that didn’t mean that he trusted her temper. Having already proven volatile at best, and if he left her alone with you, there was nothing stopping Wanda from going on the rampage he expected her to, should you step one toe out of line.

With a deep sigh, he looked at the ground, pondering his options, wishing there was another way. “I’m sorry, Wanda. I can’t take that risk. Not with someone as powerful as you. I’ll ask you one last time, let Y/N go, and surrender. This doesn’t have to end in blood.”

The witch tilted her head, studying him. “I’m afraid that’s where you’re wrong, Stephen.”

Purposefully she strode through the barrier to her home, no longer protected by it, able to engage if necessary. “I won’t let you take her from me. I won’t allow anyone to take her from me, ever again. I have grown so much stronger since we last fought. If you insist on your foolish crusade, this will end with your blood.

By now Wanda was mere feet in front of the sorcerer, refusing to back down. “Like you said, Strange. Last chance.” She tilted her head again, and a chill ran down Stephen’s spine at her determined, if slightly unhinged visage.

Strange sighed, moving to take a defensive stance, when suddenly the witch’s arm was protruding from his chest. He let out a surprised grunt. He hadn’t even seen her move, but he could feel the agony radiating throughout his body, proof enough that she had.

With a disgusting squelch, Wanda withdrew her hand, his heart clutched firmly within, still beating. Horror darkened the man’s face as he stared in shock. He hadn’t even seen her move, much less been able to react. How had she gotten so fast? Pain and shock prevented him from even speaking.

“I’m sorry it had to be this way, Stephen, but I told you. If you continued to come for me, it would be the Scarlet Witch you would be dealing with.” With an almost regretful look at his flabbergasted expression, Wanda crushed his heart in her hand before dropping it. What was left of the ruined organ thudded onto the ground at almost the same time his body did.

Wanda turned and began walking back towards the cottage, not looking back as she waved her hand. Red phosphenes surrounded Stephen Strange’s body as it disintegrated into ash. She neglected to take a portal this time, electing instead to take the long way to the house in the hopes the night air would steady her. It didn’t.

Eventually setting foot in your shared home, Wanda cast a glance towards the living room and was relieved to see you were clearly still enthralled with your new game. So engrossed were you, that you failed to notice Wanda, hand and arm covered in blood, as she headed towards the bathroom for a shower. Though she could have cleaned herself instantly with magic, she knew she was in no state of mind to return to you just yet. Despite how unaffected Wanda had made an effort to appear to Strange, her sins were weighing heavily on her heart. Killing someone she had once fought beside was not something she relished. Another death she was going to have to explain to you one day. Since the walk hadn’t done anything to ease her troubled heart and mind, the witch set about taking a shower. It stood to reason you would hear it and not question her continued delay, buying her time to not only clean up but hopefully also clear her head. 

Her shower was longer than usual, with less time spent cleaning than simply existing. Rivulets of water ran down her face as the redhead stood beneath the showerhead, staring sight unseeing at the shower wall. A necessary evil, she told herself. That didn’t make the weight of his death any less burdensome. What was she supposed to have done? Even if she had let him go, eventually he would have come back, the insufferable pest that he was. Likely then with numbers that even the Scarlet Witch might struggle with. She couldn’t have risked that. Risked you. Never again.

Why couldn’t he have just left her well enough alone? Wanda had meant what she said: she had no intention of universe hopping anymore. All she had ever wanted was her family. Now that she had you, she could begin rebuilding that, and you were making such good progress for her. Why would she want to start over with another variant of you, when you were just… so perfect for her? She still missed your Avenger variant, but every day that hole in her heart hurt just a little less. Besides, something about you specifically had a hold on her heart in a way she hadn’t anticipated.

Maybe in the beginning Wanda might.. have gone searching for another if you had not panned out as she expected. Terrible as that was to admit. Instead, from the moment she laid eyes on you before even entering into this universe, she was gripped by you. It was Fate, she was sure of it. And now? She couldn’t bear the thought of losing you. Of ever even trying to find another. Out of the vast multiverse, there was only this version of you. She wanted you as you were, and she refused to let you go or allow any harm to come to you. Even if it meant protecting you from herself.

A shuddering breath was exhaled, and Wanda began slowly rinsing the blood off of her face and out of her hair. She may have left you with a video game to keep yourself entertained, but Wanda knew from experience if she wasn’t there, it wouldn’t be too long before you would come looking. Wanda had become your rock, your favorite person. You could be playing your favorite game of all time, but if Wanda was not present, you wouldn’t have nearly as much fun. It was sort of cute how you would look for her at every opportunity, unable to stand being without her for too long. She felt similarly, and hoped you knew that now.

Finally clean, and deeming herself capable of functioning again, the witch changed into her most comfortable pajamas before mindlessly making her way back to the living room where you were. Absorbed in your game as you were, you only vaguely registered Wanda’s presence returning. You scooted slightly on the couch to make room for her, without ever taking your eyes away from the screen.

“Hey, Wands!” you said, enthusiastically. “How is your project coming along?”

The former hero was not ready to speak just yet, so she simply hummed instead, and leaned against you. She took comfort in your familiar warmth, even if your arms weren’t around her just now, your presence was enough to be soothing.

The lack of a proper response caught your attention. You almost didn’t turn to look at her, being in the midst of a pivotal battle, but you were glad you did. Hazel eyes puffy and tinted pink from crying met yours. Alarmed, you immediately stopped playing, controller forgotten in your lap, the game not even paused. Turning to the older woman, you placed one hand on her arm, the other to her cheek which she leaned in to.

“Wanda? What’s wrong? Has something happened?” 

Oh her precious detka, thought the witch. Always such a big heart, eager to provide comfort and aid. Perhaps if she were to tell you, maybe you would understand. Maybe you would forgive her. As she took in your concerned gaze though, she knew she wasn’t ready to risk it. Not right now. Instead, she shook her head to your question, unwilling to answer it.

“Can we not talk about it right now?” Her Sokovian accent was slightly more pronounced.

Though you were dying of curiosity as to what could bring someone so mighty to tears, you didn’t press. It’s not as if there would be something someone as powerless as you could do anything about whatever it was anyway. All you could do was ask and offer comfort. Wanda would tell you when she was ready. Until then, this was your opportunity to return some of the love and support she had provided you with, and you positively ached to bring that to her. Wordlessly, you pulled her into your arms, leaning back on the couch until she was laying atop your body. Murmuring gentle words of reassurance, you held her close, occasionally running your fingers through her auburn locks.

After a while, you grabbed the remote nearby and turned the tv from your video game to the DVD player. The Dick Van Dyke show began playing softly in the background, and Wanda’s chest bloomed with love for you at your thoughtfulness. She nuzzled further into your embrace, staying that way for the better part of the rest of the day as you both dozed intermittently.

Hours later Wanda slipped into a proper sleep, and once evening had rolled around, you took it upon yourself to cook dinner. Though you hadn’t wanted to part from the witch, she clearly needed the rest, and you wanted to surprise her by making dinner for her. Carefully you rolled her away from your chest and onto the couch instead, placing one of the pillows beneath her head. The only indication she registered any change was the slight, adorable scrunching of her nose. Why was this woman so damn cute?!

The kitchen had never been your chosen domain. Before Wanda, you were more likely to burn a pot of water than actually cook something successfully. Now you were hoping some of her lessons had rubbed off on you as you rummaged through the pantry and fridge trying to locate ingredients. With any luck you would be able to throw together and create something vaguely resembling an edible meal.

It was a pleasant surprise for you to discover that you currently had all the ingredients available to make Chicken Paprikash - Wanda’s favorite meal from her home in Sokovia. Going through her recipe note cards, it didn’t take you long to find it, and soon you were throwing seasonings in a pot along with some onions, tomatoes, peppers, and the chicken. While that was cooking, you prepared the noodles. A little under an hour later, and everything was coming together. You just hoped it wasn’t trash.

The aromatic and savory fragrance must have awoken the redhead because she sleepily padded her way into the kitchen to find her sweet surprise. You couldn’t see her yet, your back to her as you stirred the food while it simmered. Though unable to carry a tune to save your life, you were humming quietly to yourself with your earbuds firmly in place as you focused on making the delicious meal. Precious.

“Are you cooking, detka?” Wanda asked just loud enough to be heard over your music, and you jumped, startled. Blushing you turned to face the witch and grinned sheepishly.

“Uhh.. if you could call it that?” you chuckled, pulling out an earbud. “I just thought since you’re always taking such good care of me, maybe I could return the favor?” Voice lilting upwards almost in a question, hoping you hadn’t overstepped.

Moving to stand next to you and see what you had made, Wanda’s eyes widened as she took in the familiar dish. “Is this chicken paprikash?”

“Haha, yeah uhh.. my attempt at it at least?” You absentmindedly rubbed the back of your neck  - a nervous tick you’re pretty sure you didn’t have as a child until you started watching anime to learn the nuances of facial expressions better. It wasn’t until well into adulthood you learned most people don’t actually do that. Embarrassed, you fought not to slap your own arm, and instead simply lower it like a normal person.

“I hope I didn’t butcher it too badly. I tried to follow the recipe you had on the card since we had all the ingredients, but I can’t speak to the integrity of the dish as I haven’t tasted it yet. Besides, you're the true connoisseur here, so even if it seems okay to me, your superior palate might be able to tell the difference.” The joke rolls easily off your tongue, followed by a quick wink.

To you this was no big deal, you were just trying to be kind. But to Wanda? This was the sweetest thing anybody had ever done for her, and it reminded her almost of when she taught your Avenger variant how to make the dish. The other you had never tried to make it for her in return however, opting simply to learn about the meal while Wanda cooked. Now, looking at the beautiful dinner you had created for her, simply because it was her favorite and might cheer her up, Wanda felt her heart about to burst with affection for you.

Unable to hold back, deft fingers gripped your neck softly, quickly pulling you in for a searing kiss. Pouring all her love, affection, and appreciation into the kiss. You were surprised, but not unhappy with this turn of events. It hadn’t been your goal, per se, a kiss from the woman you were coming to love. However, if she wasn’t melancholic anymore, then you considered your goal accomplished. Your arms came to wrap around her neck, though you were careful to keep the spoon from making contact with her clothing or hair, you had heard her take a shower earlier and didn’t want to ruin that for her.

The kiss simmered into something soft and sweet. Meanwhile your food, unfortunately, was starting to bubble over. Hearing it, the pair of you sprung apart, with you frantically pulling the pot off the eye of the stove, stirring it to return to the intended consistency. Embarrassed and amused, you both burst into giggles at the almost mishap.

“Thank you, Y/N. This is incredibly sweet of you, I-” The redhead pauses, unable to eloquently convey everything she felt in that moment. “Just, thank you.”

The wattage of your smile could have been seen from space; you were so happy. “Of course, Wands! Any time.”

While you turned off the stove, Wanda set the table so you could begin plating your dinner. Jokes and laughter flowed easily between you as you both enjoyed your meal. Wanda, who never doubted your cooking skills, though you are pleasantly surprised, enjoyed that the paprikash is not only edible but rather delicious.

As you and Wanda settled into the domesticity of it all, the witch found her heart becoming light once again. So incredibly kind and thoughtful, you brought her joy, and filled her with hope. She resolved then and there to tell you everything one day. Deserving of that much at the very least, Wanda prayed, hoping, with all her being, that you would forgive her when the truth was finally revealed. For now though she sank into the warmth and comfort you provided, falling for you just a little more with each grin you flashed her way.

A/N 2: I’m not proud of what I had Wanda do in this, but I still have some left-over rage for how Stephen treated Wanda. All she needed was a little empathy, especially from the man who made the call to allow the events with Thanos and the Mind stone to play out as they did, basically letting Vision die. For no good reason. No you can’t convince me he was right. Its lazy plot writing that out of thousands and thousands of possibilities, none of them could have involved sparing Vision, or at least making his death mean something. I’m a Wanda apologist first and foremost, and I will die on this hill. Wanda deserved better, especially from those she called “friends”. Also, I stan women’s wrongs 😛

Taglist: I remembered this time!! @dorabledewdroop

#Wanda maximoff x reader #dark!wanda x reader #wanda maximoff x fem!reader #wanda maximoff x f!reader #wanda maximoff x female reader #dark!wanda maximoff #dark!wanda maximoff x reader #wanda x reader #dark wanda x reader #yandere!Wanda #yandere wanda maximoff #wanda x y/n #wanda x you #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x reader

[acorpsecalledcorva]

Can we please not demonise systems that don't view their parts/alters/headmates as multiple individual separate people and instead as, well, parts of themselves? It can be a very important part of the recovery process to accept and take ownership of parts, that they are me and I am them and together we make up a bigger whole. To shame systems that do this can reinforce avoidant behaviours, strengthen Dissociative barriers, and lead to more instability and worsening of symptoms.

If you view your parts as parts you're not ableist, you're not a bigot, you're not a sysmed, you're not dehumanising or hurting them or viewing them as lesser than you. You're doing what works for you on your path to your personal goals and that's blessed and holy and all things right in the world like a basket of kittens that crawl all over you and nuzzle into your neck all fluffy and warm.

I can also personally say how alienating it feels to see this as the dominant narrative when neither I, as a part, or any of the rest of us feel like a whole person. To grow up always feeling less than one, to feel that huge chunks of yourself are missing, to feel a void where me should be, to not experience a split as the gain of someone new but as the loss of a part of myself. To view my parts as individual people is to completely give up on those losses of myself, to put their needs above my own, which as SAS shared recently is a common trauma response in people with CDDs. To ignore my feelings of grief over the loss of myself and put on a brave face so everyone else can have what they want.

And if that makes me sound like a whiney spoilt brat, then that's ignoring the reality of what viewing and experiencing us as parts of a whole entails. Which is that now we share ourselves amongst ourselves. Or at least work towards that. Our over all goal in therapy is to remove the barriers between us so all that we are is available to all of us at all times. That we all belong to each other, are free to live our life together as a cohesive team. To know that all of the amazing things that my parts can do are things that we can do, not things that they can do but I can't. It's not being host centric it's being system centric, to hold us all up at the same time.

Of course, if this isn't how you view or experience your system, if doing so is harmful to your system then that's good to! Do whatever works best for you. Just please for the love of the holy trinity stop judging and shaming those who do things differently from you.

(and to be a little less vague, no, being multiple people is not the "literal definition" of DID, that's why we stopped calling it Multiple Personality Disorder, because the disorder is much more often about the avoidance of self, not the gaining of multiple selves. That's the media misrepresentations of DID talking)

#syscourse

[blackholeunderyourbed]

I know that two pieces of media I've seen aren't enough to declare this a trend, but. Gonna call it a trend anyway. I'm seeing a trend in the way closeted characters are treated. Late last April I watched the first season of Heartstopper right after it came out and after my second binge wrote a long post discussing how it treats being in the closet. Tldr; Nick Nelson is the first closeted queer character I've seen that wasn't demonized and in fact affirmed in taking the time he needed, and the show is very explicit and consistent about coming out being a personal choice there's no obligation to make in any particular timeframe. That's a trend that also continued in season two that dropped earlier this month.

I just watched the new Red, White, and Royal Blue movie tonight, not having read the book and being unsure how it would treat Henry once his barriers to coming out were put into focus. I was bracing myself for Henry's reluctance to come out and how he handles his relationship with Alex as a result to default back to the way being closeted is usually framed: cowardly, inauthentic, a burden to one's out partner, and a betrayal of one's self and community. As said above, I have never seen a closeted character not be demonized in one or all of these ways.

I was incredibly surprised and appreciative of how Henry was actually handled, not only because the writing avoided leaning into the demonization aspect, but because it, like in Heartstopper, made an active and conscious effort to do the opposite. There were two primary spots that stood out to me in regard to the movie's messaging around being in the closet.

First was when Alex arrived at the palace to force Henry to talk to him after he disappeared and stopped communicating. During their confrontation, I was waiting for Alex to accuse Henry of being a coward or not choosing him, in doing so downplaying the precarious position Henry was in between his station, family, and how those elements overlap. In direct opposite to my fears, Henry expressed that exact same fear that Alex would call him a coward, only for Alex to directly say he would never call him that.

Even when their emotions are running high, at no point does Alex undermine Henry's feelings or the potential ramifications of him being out. Instead he's empathetic toward him, stressing their ability to choose each other without being out right then. He's willing to be as patient as Henry requires and is the comforting and grounding force Henry needs in that moment. Being out is never a necessity for Alex; it's about loving Henry as much as he can in whatever way he can. This scene is helped by how this scene is built up to, with great emphasis on Henry's conflict, emotions, and stress over doing the best he can for Alex out of love even if it means letting him go.

The other big moment was even more explicit and came in the form of Alex's speech addressing the situation after their emails were leaked. This section could not be more clear, as if was aware of and addressing the exact history of closet framing I was afraid it would perpetuate:

"The truth is, every queer person has the right to come out on their own terms and on their own timeline. They also have the right to choose not to come out at all. The forced conformity of the closet can not be answered with forced conformity in coming out of it. This isn’t about shame."

I'm really pleased with how Red, White, and Royal Blue framed Henry's relationship with the closet. Between that and Heartstopper, perhaps it's not enough to call it a trend, but I hope they represent a beginning of a trend in how the closet is presented. We deserve nuanced portrayals of the subject, especially when the concept of coming out originated as something done between and for queer people, not for the cishet population at large.

Coming out is not owed to anyone: not cishet people, not other queer people, not your partner, and not yourself if it's not your time yet.

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #rwrb movie #rwrb spoilers #rwrb movie spoilers #heartstopper

[chaysreality222]

Introduction to my Hogwarts Dr Self!

hey guys, it's c! in this post i'll be introducing you to myself in my hogwarts dr :) i feel it will give you guys a more in depth of my hogwarts dr. to put it out there to not confuse anyone, i have not yet shifted to this dr. i merely want to share about it so that when i do shift, you guys have some backstory <3

my time ratio is 1 hr = 1 week. i'll be shifting to 4th year- a little before 4th year technically. my first day will be the day of the quidditch world cup which is also the day of my birthday! i'll wake up on an early morning at my house by my s/o (i scripted in my irl boyfriend!!). i made my bf a potter meaning he'd be harry's older brother (also because when he wears glasses i and other people say he looks like harry potter).

ps: i am shifting for the plot but i've changed it a little bit and have included myself in the story instead of fully making myself the main character. meaning i don't want to take harry's place but always somehow be connected to the things that happen.

introduction + backstory

name: c(real name) authorne-lestrange hogwarts house: hufflepuff year: 4th blood status: pureblood patronus: a dragon wand type: 13 in. Ebony wood intertwined with silver, glistening unicorn hair

backstory: so in my dr, i am the daughter of leta lestrange. due to the lestrange reputation, she wants me to go by the last name authorne which was supposedly my father's name who has passed long before i was born. also so that it would make it hard for voldemort and the other death eaters to find me, due to my mother making an unbreakable vow that she and i would be by voldemorts side when the time was right. trying to imply that it's the destiny for all lestrange to serve voldemort. leta has constantly thought of any and all loop holes out of the vow. she doesn't want that life for me and so she got dumbledore to take me in at hogwarts thinking i'll be safer there.

disclaimer: i understand that the timeline between fantastic beasts and when harry exists is like a 70 year long stretch but i'm shifting to a reality to where she is alive to be my mum.

my house

located: cambridge, england exact address: unknown

here are some pics of the house! go to my pinterest board to see more details or rooms of the house to get a better look. of course, the middle photo is my bedroom where i'll be first waking up in my dr! i'm really excited to wake up there and take a look around. i'm also excited to be here on break or holidays!

you may have some questions on why the address is unknown. i scripted it to be like that because i felt that's something leta would do to keep me safe. also adding to the fact, i scripted she placed a protective barrier around the whole property that leads anyone who's looking in from the outside to hear nothing and see nothing but a thick forest.

my pets

their names are soren and sage! soren is my male barn owl and sage is my female cat. i'm allergic in my cr so i scripted that out so i can experience having a cat lol. i just had an idea that maybe i should script that sage fly's around on sorens back?? imagine how cute that would be.

my dorm at hogwarts

so i scripted that i have a personal dorm there at hogwarts and honestly, i'm kinda in love with the room and bathroom <3 as you guys can see here, i have a pics of my dorm! the first image, that door is the entrance into my room and then the second door in my third image is the door to my bathroom. for the last image, i added one pic of how my bathroom looks like.

i think that's pretty much it! i'm so excited to shift to my hogwarts desired reality and finally experience life as a wizard. i'm working on my shifting routine as of right now to help me get in the mood and get ready to shift! get ready for shifting storytimes <3 as always, Happy Shifting!

xoxo, c.

#reality shifting #shifting #prttygirlshifterclub #desired reality #shiftblr #shifters #shifting motivation #shiftingblr #reality shifter #shifting realities #introductiontomydrself

[ahgasegotarmy116]

The Art of Etiquette Part 3 | Jeon Jungkook

Summary: Mr. Jeon gets your number and offers to drive you to the Modiste but don't really give you an option to say no Paring: f!reader x Etiquette instructor Jungkook Word Count: 3.5k~ Warnings: Like one cuss word but thats about it lol a/n: This took longer than I had expected to post but I hope you guys like it! p.s. roughly edited because I wanted to get it out asap lol

"So start from the beginning again. What exactly did he do?" I hear as Jesse's voice come through the speaker. "He's just trying to intimidate me" I groan, not wanting to relive it again.

"He thinks that that kind of tactic is going to work well enough to make me into a 'lady'. I really don't understand how some of these upper class people think. They're acting like it's the 18th century or something" I complain, walking around my room and putting away the new clothes I bought for this whole charade. 

"I mean they more or less are if they're still concerned about stuff like having a girl go through this whole song and dance just so the rich boys know that they're up for grabs now. It just doesn't make sense" he sympathizes. "I'm glad you agree" I say, relieved that I don't have to explain myself to him. "Well why don't you just talk to him about it?" he suggests. 

"James? I would but I don't want to make it seem like I'm trying to back out or complain about it. Plus my mother would never let me hear the end of it and she really might convince him to make me get a job instead. 

"No I meant Jungkook, or Mr. Jeon or whatever the hell you call him. He could probably answer your questions if you ask nicely" he taunts at the end. 

"Talk to him? He doesn't bother to initiate any sort of conversation with me, other than when he tells me to do something. Even when he asks questions he expects me to answer with a 'yes' or 'no' and stops me from asking him anything even if I try" I groan, disgusted at the thought of trying to speak to him like I would any other person.

"He would probably just reprimand me for not doing the homework he gave me since it probably has all the answers I'm looking for" I huff. "Have you done the homework?" Jesse asks, clearly knowing the answer.

"I read the spark notes okay" I admit rolling my eyes "So I know gist of it. I showed you how thick those books were right? There was no way I'm going to be able to finish all of them by Monday" I groan, tossing myself onto the bed. 

"Well it's either read or talk and if I were you I would talk to him and get on his good side. It would benefit you more in the long run" he say, stating the obvious that honestly I had not thought of, considering how much he infuriates me.

"At the end of the day though it's up to you babes" he finishes. We talk for a bit more before he has to go and he doesn't forget to remind me to read some more before I go to bed to which I brush off and wrap up the call to prevent any further nagging. But before I'm even able to lock my phone after ending the call I get a text from a random number...

Unknown: You have a fitting tomorrow so we'll be meeting there instead.

I frown for a second as I stare at the screen, contemplating if I should answer or not.

Me: Mr. Jeon?  I question making certain that my suspicions are correct.

Unknown: I see that no one has told you yet. Yes it's Mr. Jeon, I acquired your number from Matthew so as to ease our means of communication. He finishes matter o factly.

I stare at the screen again and contemplate how to respond but before I'm able to he sends another message. 

Unknown: I hope this hasn't made you uncomfortable. If you would like I can continue to send messages through Matthew instead. he offers after noticing my hesitation to respond 

Me: No this is fine, it would make things more convenient for the both of us. I answer, feeling almost as if a barrier between us has been broken down with this nonabrasive conversation we're having at the moment.

Unknown: Agreed. I just checked and noticed that I pass your college on the way to the modiste so I will pick you up instead. he sends, telling me more than offering. 

Me: You don't have to do that, I'm perfectly capable of getting myself there on my own. I reply, not appreciating the way he's gone about this.

Unknown: The location is quite far, farther than my house so it would be more cost effective for you if you were to simply accept my offer. Although I've already told your father and he said he would send someone over to pick up your car from the University. So unless you would like to walk there I suggest you come with me. There's the Mr. Jeon we all know and hate...we meaning me.

Me: Yes Mr. Jeon. I reply, knowing that I've lost the battle before it has even begun.

Unknown: I shall meet you outside the main building at 4:15. Sweet dreams. he finishes leaving me confused. 

'Sweet dreams? Sweet dreams?' I repeat in my head. 'That's the first remotely nice thing he's ever said to me. Why would he say that? He could've just ended it at 4:15.

Why Sweet dreams?' I shake my head hoping that would in some way get rid of whatever overthinking my brain starts to do but it's no use, especially since I still have it right in front of me. 

I change his name to 'Jungkook' because at least that way I can feel like I'm disrespecting him on a daily basis without his knowledge, assuming he will be sending me unnecessary reminders of stupid things he thinks I'll forget.

Knowing me though I probably would've forgotten it anyways since I kind of black out during our lessons at times. He talks so much that after my already mind numbing classes I can hardly focus on what he's supposed to be teaching me. 

~~~~~~~~

I walk down the front steps and see an all black car waiting right in front, leaving me to assume it's Mr. Jeon. "Get in or we'll be late" he says after rolling down the window. I roll my eyes and open the door, plopping myself down in the back seat.

"What are you doing?" he questions, looking at me through the rear view mirror. "Putting my seatbelt on?" I answer just as confused as he is. He takes a deep breath in and out and starts up the car, driving away before saying anything else. 

"Oh did you expect me to sit up front with you?" I ask now amused at his behavior. "Seeing as I am not your personal driver yes, I did expect you to sit up front" he says tonguing his cheek. 'Huh, so he does that when he's irritated. Noted'.

"Yet you gave me no choice but to drive me there" I argue back. "I did this as a favor so we would both show up on time. I guess I won't offer next time" he says and I can see how much he's trying to restrain himself. 

"Mr. Jeon did something happen?" I ask, genuinely curious as to why he's acting like this. He's usually upfront and intimidating, but never angry with me. Maybe a little irritated but the feeling is mutual. "No, now will you please stop being a brat for five seconds? We have a long journey and I would rather we spend it in silence than listening to your insolence" he says raising his voice. 

I decide that it's in both of our best interests if I remain quiet but it takes everything in me to do just that. 'Who does he think he is? Calling me a brat?' I scoff quietly to myself and put in my headphones, not missing the glare he sends me through the rear view again. I press play and rest my head against the window, deciding to get some rest instead of dealing with whatever attitude that's got him all messed up.

~~~~~~

"Wake up" Jungkook says once we get there. He looks back and finds me fast asleep with my headphones in, leaving him rolling his eyes and getting out of the car, making sure to slam his door on the way out. He goes around and opens the door I was lying up against and let's me fall a bit but catches me half way before I actually topple out of the car. 

"Hey!" I whine, now unfortunately being forcefully woken up. "We're here. Get out and wipe that drool off your face" he says and pushes me back in so I'm sitting upright and makes his way over to the building, not bothering to wait for me.

"What's his issue today?" I groan and reach up to wipe the drool off my face he had spoken about but I find none leaving me even more irritated with the fact that he's not only grumpy but he still has the audacity to try and tease me.

When I finally make my way into the building I'm met with so many different kinds of dresses and fabrics and ribbon and everything that you could possibly imagine that would be in a dress maker's shop. 

"This must be y/n!" an older woman, most likely in her sixties says as she comes up and gives me a little smile. "Hello" I say shyly, remembering the scolding that Jungkook had given me earlier until I glance over at him and see that he is giving me an even bigger scowl than he had before. 

"I mean it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance" I say giving her a nod. "She's still got a lot to learn" Mr. Jeon says and walk with the dressmaker and talks her through everything that we've planned to do today but I can tell she is already well versed but continues to let him explain all the same.

"Y/n" I hear him call out my name, leaving me bringing my attention back over to him after I had just started to look through the different bolt of fabric that are sitting on the various shelves. 

"Yes?" I say remembering to give him a verbal response. "Please go ahead and stand up on that stool over there and wait for her to come up and measure you" I look over at the area he's motioned to to make sure I know exactly where to go so I won't get scolded for not doing as I was told. "Yes Mr. Jeon" I say and make my way over and wait for her.

"Oh you're going to look beautiful in the gowns we're making for you!" the woman says as she happily continues to take my measurements. She notices my reaction and looks around for Jungkook and sees that he's on a phone call in the other room.

"It's okay I won't make them girly and pink". "How did you kno-" "A woman always knows, especially when I've been in this business for so long. Also don't feel a need to be formal with me love. I don't subscribe to that stuffy nonsense" says with a chuckle. 

"But you make dresses for them" I say confused with her stance on things. "It's good money dearie, plus I enjoy making them. I started sewing at the age of four believe it or not!" she says looking up at me over the edge of her glasses as she checks to see how long she'll need to make the dresses. 

"Are you clumsy at all?" she asks rather randomly if you ask me. "No not really, why?" I ask tilting my head slightly. "I just wanted to see if I should make the hem a bit shorter so you wouldn't step on it but I think you'll be just fine" she finishes and take a final look at me and at the measurements she's written down. 

"Perfect! Go ahead and sit down over there and rest you legs a bit while I bring out some dresses that you'll be trying on" she says and turns to make her way over towards the backroom. "Dresses? There's more than one?" I question and she unfortunately doesn't hear me since she's already out of earshot. 

"You'll be trying on at least five dresses today. Just so we can make sure we choose the right one" Jungkook says right behind me, scaring the shit out of me. "Sh- I mean, you startled me" I say placing a hand over my chest. "You'll live" he says simply and goes to sit on one of the chairs facing the stool I had been standing on.

"Are you going to just sit there and watch?" I question, seeing as he hasn't made moves to do much else. "It's one of my tasks of being your tutor" he says and fishes out his phone to respond to what I assume is another message. 

"Your job is to watch me try on pretty dresses?" I question, amused by the situation. "Yes y/n, it is my duty to make sure that the dresses we choose match the themes of whatever events we are going to, as well as being appropriate to the trends nowadays" he finishes and lowers his voice when he sees the seamstress come back. 

"I heard that" she says while rolling a rack of dresses into the room. "Do you see one you like?" she asks and motions for me to come closer. I look at the rack and see there are so many dresses of different colors and patterns and styles, I just don't know what to pick.

"Which one do you think I should try on?" I ask turning towards her. "Well why don't we let Mr. Jeon choose, since he so kindly reminded me that my taste is out of date" she says and winks at me, showing me she's teasing while simultaneously giving Jungkook the cold shoulder. 

"I did not mean it as any disrespect. What I was trying to say wa-" "Oh hush child, just come over here and chose a dress before I really start to get upset with you" she teases and he walks closer to the rack looking through the dresses while he sends a glance my way most likely debating on which one might suit me best.

He takes a second to think after looking through all of them but doesn't seem to find one he's satisfied with. Looking around the room for a second he finds another dress on display and walks over to it to take a closer look. 

"This one" he says almost bored and walks back over to sit in the chair he had been occupying moments ago. "He's cranky today isn't he?" she whispers to me and I nod my head quickly agreeing. "I'm glad you noticed too" I say and she walks to the back and grabs that exact dress in my size. "Go ahead and change over there and I'll grab some pins incase we need to alter it" she says and I do as I'm told. 

Coming out of the little dressing room she has I smooth the dress out and watch as her eyes light up. "This looks incredible on you! I don't even think I'll need to alter it at all!" she says excitedly. I smile at her and thank her silently and see Jungkook walking over to take a closer look. 

He takes in my figure from top to bottom and has me do a slight twirl to see it from all angles. "We'll take this one" he says and starts to walk over to the counter to settle the bill. "That's it?" I question her, confused as to how we actually managed to finish this all without me having to try on a bunch more. "I mean he did pick the perfect dress for you" she says walking me up to the full length mirror and I'm shocked at how much I love it as well. 

I twist and turn around a bit more to see the movement of the dress and the more I watch the more I fall in love with it. "You're right, this one's perfect!" I say and turn my vision towards where Jungkook had gone to and I notice that he's most likely been watching me this entire time. He clears his throat and fixes his posture to try to cover up for himself but I can see how almost bashful he looks from being caught in the act. 

"Why don't you go change and then we'll have this all settled by the time you're done" she says and ushers me back in the room again. "By the way, is there something going on between you two?" she questions, catching me off guard. "What do you mean?" I ask turning around to face her. "I mean I've never seen him look at someone like he just was a few moments ago" she points out, confirming my suspicions. 

"Plus, in all my years of him bringing his students here he has never once put in any effort to pick out a dress, and half the time the student ends up loving the dress while both Jungkook and I disagree but he lets them choose it nonetheless" she says and I take a look at myself in the mirror again, trying to asses if this is the one that I really truly want.

"It just seemed like he knew you and he knew exactly what would look good on you without even having to try" she says giving me a smug smirk. "No ma'am please it's nothing like tha-" "I'm just kidding child don't worry. I swear no one in your generation can take a joke anymore" she says and walks out of the room laughing at the slight panic I had started to go through.

~~~~

"Thanks for the ride" I say when we pull up to my house, this time having sat in the front seat. "No problem" he says and looks over at me, this being the first time he truly had this entire trip, or at least the first time I noticed. "Hey can I ask you a question?" I say, stopping before I reach for the handle to get out. "You just did" he says, this being one of the first times he's tried to make some sort of joke. 

I roll my eyes at him and I see a flash of an almost smile but it's gone as soon as it came, being replaces with his usual stoic expression. "How did you know what dress to choose for me?" I ask and watch as he gets awkward again just like he had done when we were back at the modiste.

He turns to look out the wind shield, this time giving me a full view of how the tips of his ears have gone a bit red from the question. "I'm not sure, I think having to go through that process so many times it just seemed like that one was the obvious pick" he says and gets out of the car.

"What are you doing?" I ask following suit and watch as he pulls the garment bag out and starts walking up the steps to the front door. "I'm making sure the dress stays well taken care of. I'll hand it to one of the staff when they open the door" he says and waits for me at the top of the stairs. Before I'm even able to reach for my keys I hear the door being unlocked and the face of my mother comes into view. 

"Oh hello, you must be Mr. Jeon" she says sending him a bright smile to which he reciprocates and bows a bit as a sign of respect. "Hello, I just wanted to make sure that y/n and her dress got back safely" he says and she waves one of the housekeepers over to carry it up to my room for us although it would've been fine by me if I could've just done all of this by myself.

"Well that was very sweet of you. Would you like to stay for dinner? It should be ready soon, plus we would like to show our gratitude to you for making such a long journey there and back for her" she offers. 

"Perhaps another time. I have a business meeting across town tonight but thank you so much for your generosity" he says, politely declining. "Well thank you again for bringing her home" she reiterates and I start to not so subtly try to usher her back inside.

"Come on mom he said he has to go" I say to her under my breath. "Well it was so nice to meet you Mr. Jeon. I hope we'll see each other again soon" she says, leaving me having to almost push her inside. 

"Thank you Mr. Jeon have a good night" I say and as I turn to close the door he says the same thing that had me over thinking just last night. "Good night y/n, sweet dreams" he says with a soft smile and heads to his car, driving off and leaving me with a confused mix of emotions yet again. 

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[apomaro-mellow]

Part 4

"Is the living room the best place for this?", Robin asked. "In the middle of the day?"

"We've got a team handling the angry mob. And another team taking care of the monsters coming out of the town gate", Dustin said.

"And you're sure Vecna and the Mind Flayer can't see anything you see?", Will asked, his eyes hard.

Kas met his gaze, wishing their first meeting was under better circumstances. "I'm sure. I am connected to him. But he doesn't control me."

He was holding tight to Steve's hand. If there was one person that could pull his strings...

"Hey", Steve squeezed his hand. "Focus. I know what that look means. We're going to start soon."

Kas let out a breath. "Okay, I'm new to the whole, supergirl thing. Explain to me how this is gonna work again?"

"I'm going to go into your mind", El began. "But I can't go in directly. Because you won't let me." She had already tried and Kas had lashed out, putting a barrier between her and his deeper thoughts.

"So she's gonna go in through me instead", Dustin beamed.

"Still not sure how I feel about Henderson being in my head", Kas said.

But they had already decided that as much as he liked Steve, it couldn't be him. Not when he was still split on how he felt and acted. There was a chance he'd welcome Steve with open arms. It was just as likely that he'd shield him out.

"I'll be here the whole time", Steve said.

"Alright. Let's do this."

Kas laid his body along the couch, his head in Steve's lap. Steve played with his hair and it didn't take long for him to fall asleep. He didn't remember if that was part of the plan, but it happened. Kas was in the black void of the shared mind space. Eddie was there too, chewing on the nail of his thumb.

"What if this goes wrong? We don't know what's gonna happen when they kill Vecna."

"We told Steve not to worry. We have to believe that too. We've gotta believe that everything's gonna be okay."

"But what if it's not?"

"But what if it is? What if we could have everything we want?"

"Whoa, this is trippy", came Dustin's voice. And suddenly he was next to them.

"You got in!" Both consciousness' shouted and hugged Dustin while jumping, which brought a big smile to his face.

"Okay, I've got several questions. First of all, which is which?"

"The one with the sharp teeth is Kas, dude."

"Coooool." Dustin was still looking back and forth between them. "So like, why is there two of you? Did Vecna do that?"

"He did", Eddie said. "Said he was making me better. Removing my inhibitions."

"So you uninhibited is just you being super into Steve? Cause that's the only thing that's changed since you got back."

"He's right", Kas said with a grin.

"Yeah, well", Eddie stuck his hands into his back pockets. "Turns out that was a big part of myself that I was holding back."

"Why? Because he's a guy? Or because it's Steve?"

Eddie looked to Kas, waiting for him to answer for the both of them. But Kas was silent.

"He asked you, not me."

"Oh, so we're the same person when it suits you but when it comes to the hard questions-"

"Eddie, we don't care if you're gay. Or if it's Steve. You know that, right?", Dustin said.

"You don't know that", Eddie said with a shake of his head. "You can't speak for everyone."

Dustin threw his hands up. "Then think about how everyone's been treating you two. Yeah, maybe me, and Lucas, and Mike were too focused on other things to see it, but El and Will knew. I bet Nancy and Robin knew too."

Eddie was trying to hide behind his hair while Kas was openly smirking. Robin definitely knew. She'd walked in on them one too many times.

"Could it really be this easy?", Eddie asked to the open air.

Dustin started counting off his fingers. "I mean, there's still the angry mob that wants to kill you, homophobes outside your group of friends, plus Steve is probably a high maintenance boyfriend-"

"I can provide any services he needs", Kas licked his lips.

"And you're gonna need to put a lid on that kinda talk. At least a loose one. Else you're gonna make us all gag on your PDA."

"No promises", Eddie and Kas said at the same time.

In the distance they heard screaming and something like the sound of paper ripping apart. Kas winced. He could tell what was happening.

"Vecna is dead."

Eddie's eyes were wide. "Oh shit."

"Eddie, you're gonna be fine, right? When we wake up, you're still gonna be there, right?", Dustin asked, grabbing his arms suddenly.

Eddie looked down into his eyes. For the first time in a while, he wanted to believe. He had to believe that everything was going to be okay. He was coming back, he'd get to have Steve, they'd figure out the mob of townsfolk. Hell, he might even get his GED.

"Dustin, I'll see you at home", he said.

When his eyes opened, it was to the sound of Steve's battle cry as he sliced the head off a demogorgan. Eddie shot up and took out the one that was coming at him from behind, digging his teeth in and ripping it apart.

Steve turned and wrapping his arms around him, mindful of the machete but not of the blood covering them both. When he pulled back, Steve looked into his eyes.

"Are you all the way there?"

"Indeed I am", he said. Kas was no longer a physical presence in his mind. If Steve wanted all of him, then that was what he would give. He wrapped his arms around Steve and leaned in, only to be stopped by Steve putting two fingers to his lips.

"I love you Eds, but I'm not kissing you with monster blood in your mouth."

"A compromise then." Eddie kissed his fingertips, then his knuckles, then the back of his hand. Steve's hand also had drops of blood on them but he found he didn't really care. He was halfway up Steve's arm when Will cleared his throat.

"Yeah, we're still here", he reminded them.

"And if we're done, we can get to the others. This isn't over yet", Dustin said before grabbing his walkie and relaying the current status to whoever was listening.

El walked up to them, smiling. "Congratulations."

Steve looked only slightly embarrassed and Eddie took that as a win. Because whatever happened next, they could handle it together. Eddie was all in.

END

A/N: Thanks yall for readin! And feel free to send me prompts for steddie im insatiable right now

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[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

Twisted Wonderland Marine Biologist AU Snippet

Hey everyone! I'm still okay, just been dealing with real life stuff and discovered I may have accidentally put myself through a burnout even when I was trying to avoid it. =w=

I've been working through it by focusing on more personal projects and other fandoms, and I've also been focusing more on my physical and mental health lately. I'm getting better every day though, and I'm feeling good about stuff!

Anyway, I know I haven't posted anything in a while since my last update, so I wanted to tide everyone over with a snippet I had written back in May for the Marine Biologist AU. I was saving this for when I finally reached that part of the story and got it off the ground, buuuuut...honestly, it's too adorable for me NOT to share!!!

Reminder that in this and the mermaid AU, there is a communication barrier where humans and mermaids cannot speak the same language. In the Marine Biologist AU though, the boys can understand some if not most words, so they have nothing but time to try and listen to the researchers talk and learn how to speak the language.

So...what happens when our little researcher Yuu just so happens to drop an apple in the tank holding a certain Guppy and gorgeous Betta Fish?

////--------------////

"Whoa, geez!” Yuu squawked, their hand just barely touching the apple as it bounced off the grating before falling into the water with a ‘plop’. Sighing, Yuu said, “Well, there goes part of my lunch.”

One moment the apple was bobbing along in the waves, the next…a hand reached out and grabbed it, a familiar adorable face emerging from the water to examine his catch. “Oh, hi, Guppy!” Yuu called out, happy to see the smaller mermaid. Violet floated nearby, though it was clear that he was watching them both with that intense gaze of his. “Sorry, that’s not a fish. It’s an apple.”

At that he perked up so fast that Yuu almost thought he’d gotten whiplash, adorable doe eyes looking shocked and amazed as he squeaked at them.

“D…do you know what an apple is?” Yuu asked, earning another insistent chirp from him before they pointed at the fruit clutched in his hands. “Apple. Ahp…pull…”

He looked between them and the fruit, looking so confused for a moment. Then, he held it out and—pointing at it and himself—he spoke and said, “Ahp…ull…Eah…pul…Eahpul!”

Yuu was floored as they stared, not sure if they’re feeling amazement or pure disbelief or both as Guppy continued his game of charades. It was as if he was trying to tell them…

“Is…Ehpul…Eh…pel…Epel…your name?” Yuu asked.

“Yeeee!” ‘Epel’ squealed, practically squirming in place and looking absolutely elated as he nodded enthusiastically. “Epel! Epel!”

Even as he continued chattering in the strange language while still repeating his new ‘name’, Yuu found themselves hardly able to move as they tried to process this new development. Had…they been able to understand Yuu this whole time and just…didn’t know how to communicate back? Or is this a new development brought on by their continuous interactions with the mermaids?

Once he had calmed down, Epel had turned his attention back to the apple and curiously sniffed it. Then—before they could think to try and get it back—he had taken a bite out of it and chewed. A moment later his eyes grew wide, the ear fins wiggling as a wide (chubby cheeked) smile bloomed on his face and he let out a high-pitched warble.

“Huh…? Do…you guys actually eat fruit?” Yuu uttered in amazement as Epel chomped away at the fruit faster than they could blink, practically swallowing the core whole before licking the juice off his fingers. A moment later he lunged up onto the deck, peeking over the edge as he sniffed around like a cat on the hunt. “Whoa! Slow down there! I don’t have any more apples if that’s what you’re looking for.”

Once he seemed to realize this, he looked up at Yuu and-

'Oh no...those are the cutest puppy eyes I've ever seen!!' Yuu thought. 'How does a mermaid know how to do the puppy eyes?!'

"Ahpul...app...le," Epel chirped. "Apple..? Apple!"

"O-okay, okay! I'll go and get more apples for you!"

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland marine biologist au #twst marine biologist au #I had so much fun writing this scene back in May and really wanted to share it earlier #I hope everyone enjoys it nonetheless! #epel felmier #pomefiore

[backtothefanfiction]

Please Don't Leave Me | Agent Whiskey x Reader

Summary: The mission goes very wrong.

Warnings: Injuries and angst

Word Count: 1K

A/N: just a quick writing challenge for myself based around the prompt please don't leave me. I put a bunch of characters into a generator and Jack came out and it was honestly the easiest little story to create in 20 minutes. Enjoy.

There’s a reason you should never mix business with pleasure and it’s because of moments like this that actually remind you why.

It was supposed to be a simple mission. In and out with time for a good night at the hotel after. Just you and Jack doing what you do best. You had been working on and off together for five years now. Screwing each other after missions to let off steam for almost equally as long. Everyone told you not to do it. All the other girls in the office who had ever been seduced by him and left flapping on the shore when the tide went back out; warned you to stay away. But you were sure you could handle it. Told yourself it was just sex and that you wouldn’t fall in love. But he knew how to play the game. Knew how to win you over every time and lull you into a false sense of security to the point you thought, maybe he did care. Maybe he did love you back. But that look in his eye right now as he stood in the doorway, flash drive in hand ready to make a run for it whilst these brutes did everything they could to keep you down.

You hadn’t worried at first, but then you took a bullet to the shoulder and god damn if that didn’t hurt to the point you just wanted to hide in the corner and cry; but you couldn’t. You were a tough badass woman who had trained and worked too damn hard for this job to not keep fighting for the sake of the mission.

You really couldn’t blame him when he gave you that apologetic look and said, “Sorry Darlin’, it’s nothing personal.”

“Don’t leave me!” you had called out desperately. He was your back up after all. Without him there was no barrier between these men and yourself. Who knew what they would do to you. Kill you most likely, but when- and after what torture. “Jack! Please don’t leave me!” But he was gone.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! 

Your arm smarted, but you continued to try and punch your way out. 

It was no good. Although some of them had run after Whiskey, many of them continued to gang up on you. You were on the floor now, arms held up protectively to your head, body curled tightly in an attempt to protect your vital organs; but it was no use. They kicked and they kicked- one thud after the other against your body. You should have been focusing, but what was the use. So your mind wandered- back to him. Every tender soft word said between crisp white hotel bed sheets. Every tender kiss. Every “it’s only you kiddo.” And he still left you behind.

There was a resounding bang! Followed by another and another. The kicking stopped. Your body started to relax as you opened your eyes to see him there in the doorway, a smoking gun in each hand. “Now fellas!” He called out into the room and you looked around the room at the men in their shitty black suits, all lying on the floor nursing various shot wounds. None of them instantly fatal, but still deadly enough. All hitting vital organs that would bleed out quickly, but not enough that they wouldn’t be able to listen to his lesson first. “Is that any way to treat a lady?”

You glowered at him when he finally locked his eyes on yours. He quickly holstered his pistols before rushing over to you. “Now you didn’t think I was actually gonna leave ya, did you?” You groaned as his arms reached around your body and lifted you from the floor.

“The drive?” you asked, your voice raspy.

“I handed it off to Ginger.” He said as he carried you from the room.

“Wait? Ginger’s here?” you groaned.

“Hey, rest now. Don’t worry, I’m gonna get you out of here.”

That was the last thing you remembered before your vision went black and you went limp in his arms.

—---

“What happened?” You asked as you woke up in the medical bay two days later. To your surprise, Jack was sat in a chair beside your bed reading some rodeo magazine. 

He quickly closed it, putting it down in his lap, before leaning across the bed, reaching for your hand.

“I’m sorry,” he said earnestly. “I thought I would lead them away, but clearly not enough of them.” You remained quiet, both slowly recalling the events that left you feeling black and blue, but also analyzing the pain in his eyes. “I called for evac the moment I left the room. Ginger said she’d seen everything through the glasses and was already on the way. Champ told me to get the drive out first. I had to do it. I couldn’t let on…” his voice trailed off.

“You couldn’t let on what?”

“I know I’m not supposed to do shit like this. You know. I told Champ I wouldn’t- fuck!” he hung his head in shame. “I didn’t think…”

“You didn’t think what? Didn’t think what Jack?!” you pressed him.

“That I’d actually care about you!” He snapped. “That I’d fall in love with you.” His words stunned you. “I compromised the mission today.” he said with shame.

“Yeah, but you got it out. You did the right thing in the end.”

“Yeah, but it should never had come to that.” He grunted. “I saw you in that dress and I just became distracted. It should never have come to that.” He repeated himself. 

In the silence that fell, you finally realised what he had said. “You love me?” you questioned tentatively.

He looked at you confused. “After all that, that’s the thing that you take away.” He paused for a moment, if only to gauge your reaction. “Of course I do. Knew it the first moment I met you. All smart mouth and attitude and…” his voice trailed off as he got lost in you. You squeezed his hand encouragingly. “I promise I’ll never actually leave you, okay? I’ll always come back for you.”

And he always did. Until the Poppy Adams case. Until he would never come back to you again.

#writing challenge #short story #agent jack whiskey daniels #agent whiskey x reader #agent whiskey imagine #agent whiskey #jack daniels x reader #jack whiskey daniels #pedro character imagines

[shortpplfedup]

Episode 10 has put me squarely in my Jeng feelings in a way I have not obsessed about a character probably since Teh Krittikorn Saetun. After watching him compartmentalize his way into a complete abdication of responsibility this week, and having read literally every piece of stellar meta the fandom has churned out, but especially from folks like @bengiyo and @nakasomethingkun about the corporate setting actually being the point of this story...I'm completely down the rabbithole, no way out guys. I vacillate between my optimistic and pessimistic expectations on how satisfactorily this story will wrap. @lurkingshan and @neuroticbookworm STAY on Tee's ass and I can't quite say they're wrong. But the thing I'm now 100% sure about is that the romance is not the point of this story. The romance is here in service of points Tee wants to make and themes he wants to explore around capitalism and queerness (second time Tee is going hard at this idea, after poking at it in Lovely Writer). Tee is using romance because it's the most effective way to make queerness legible for and saleable to a general audience, WHICH IS IN ITSELF A COMMENTARY ON CAPITALISM AND QUEERNESS BUT I JUST BLEW MY OWN DAMN MIND AND HAVE TO PUT THAT IDEA DOWN FOR NOW.

Jeng, Jeng is the character sitting at the intersection, at the tension point between capitalism and queerness. Jeng, who thanks to @waitmyturtles DRILLING Asian family dynamics into my head over the last few months, I have realised is incredibly unlikely to be able to escape his fate as the heir to Jian Group. Why does Jeng work TWO FULL TIME JOBS? Because he can only have the things he wants if he also accepts the things he never wanted. He can't abandon Jian Group, but he can build next to it an entire other life: Pearl & Oliver, queer speakeasies, doing his little part to minimize food waste and support a marginalized community, and Pat. COMPARTMENTALIZATION. For all Jeng's big talk about work/life integration, he doesn't even consider that he can mesh the things he wants with the things he's obligated to do until Pat points it out to him under that bridge. Shouts to the homie @wen-kexing-apologist for breaking that scene down and making me realise that moment is the closest Jeng got this episode to the shape of the relationship he actually wants with Pat. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

I say all that by way of preamble (I'm a long-winded bitch, strap in) on the way to one of my actual points: nobody actually KNOWS Jeng Kittiphong Atthachiranon. Even the two people closest to him in the story, Jaab and Tae, only know pieces. Pat barely knows him at all, because even though he desperately WANTS Pat to know him, the boss thing was a barrier to that, and now they've speedrun straight into a unholy mess when they should have been truly getting to know each other. You can see how, were it not for Jeng's slow motion rolling breakdown (of which his intense infatuation with Pat is honestly part and parcel) and Pat's role at Jian Group, these two could have spent a year at this pace, fucking and talking and falling in love and it would have been FINE. But the life Jeng never wanted broke containment and rolled over Pat, and now here they are.

@plantsarepeopletoo pointed out how the narrative punishes characters for going too fast or out of order (Jaab and Jen), and rewards those who take their time and stay the course (Chot). We thought Jeng would be the latter. That's the Jeng we're introduced to: calm, sensible, logical, responsible, in control. But that Jeng is a TOTAL SHAM, that Jeng is a façade built to meet the world's expectations of him, a carefully crafted and cultivated image of cisheteropatriarchal corporate masculine perfection. The Jeng who has been panting after Pat for the better part of a year and doing absolutely INSANE shit to get next to him, that's the real Jeng. This episode was Jeng trying to rebuild the wall between his two lives after having it collapse last ep and utterly failing BECAUSE PAT NOW IS PART OF HIS LIFE ON BOTH SIDES OF THAT WALL. He cannot neatly compartmentalize Pat into his Desired Life, because Pat also has to exist in his Expected Life. And Pat doesn't actually know Jeng, because this is all happening too fast and out of order, so he doesn't know that Jeng is in the middle of a full-on existential crisis as his two worlds collide.

Sidenote: Pat accidentally hit on Jeng's compartmentalization tendencies early in the show I realize, when he drunkenly whinged about how he couldn't understand why Jeng felt like two different people, and he didn't know which one was the real one. I think that sort of bullseye targeting at the heart of Jeng is one of a host of reasons Jeng fell so hard and so totally for Pat: he thought Pat understood him on some level. It's why having to come out to Pat, having to explain himself when he thought he didn't have to, knocked him onto the back foot and things haven't REALLY been right with them since.

It's so sad, and SO QUEER that Jeng is living this double life and it's slowly breaking him. He's coming apart at the seams trying to hold it all and not lose any of it. Jeng talked a good game about work/life integration, but the flip side of that is bringing your whole self to work. And he can't do that, he can't even think of doing that, right? But he's gotta do something because now Pat has been dragged into the mess, and worse yet Pat has brought Jeng's Desired Life to the direct and un-ignorable attention of the key figure in Jeng's Expected Life: his father. And while I think Jeng's father is aware of his Desired Life (disapprovingly natch, but silently allowing it as long as Jeng continues to live his Expected Life), I think he's stood ready to stamp it out the minute it becomes a problem. And the problem has arrived. That's why Jeng looks so sick when he realizes that Pat went to his father to resign. The shit has truly hit the fan. Compartmentalization is over.

#step by step #step by step the series

[kanmom51]

Hi! I've been following your blog for a while. As a longtime ARMY and someone who (wants to) believe that jikook is real, your posts never fail to give me the flutters.

Did you get a chance to see Jimin's choreography practice sketch yet? (spoiler: jk shows up hehe)

Whenever I see jikook interacting (and especially in recent years), it always feels and looks like it should be something kept private. Idk. I'm parasocializing third-wheeling lmao. The way they can't stop smiling at each other. The way their hands reach for each other like second nature. The way jk speaks to jm; I know little about the nuances of korean informal/formal language, but even then their tones are what make the difference to me. Language barrier or not, it's hard to miss how jk speaks to jm, which is so different from how he speaks to the other members. And all this, out of a less than 1-min interaction between the two (maybe I'm also projecting lol)

Ever since jk's suchwita live, I've plunged neck deep in jikook feels. Jk didn't have to make a live centered around jm, but he did. He didn't have to watch 2 diff versions of set me free pt 2, nor watch the bts teasing jm compilation, all in front of us; but he did. He did, and it's been wreaking havoc on my heart ever since. That must mean something, because jk doesn't do this for the other members. It goes beyond fanservice because as you already mentioned, he wasn't paying much attention to ARMY during the live. We weren't the focus; jm was.

I'm not delusional - at least, I don't want to be delusional. I've said this to myself many times since 2015. I enjoyed their dynamic together, but as time went on, the dynamic began to shift. Each year it became less funny and more real. Certain moments, like hickey gate and rosebowl, seemed straight out of fantasy. And even looking beyond them, the reactions of the other members are also very telling.

I don't remember why I wrote this anymore lol. I'm just glad I don't seem to be alone in thinking they're real. And thank you for your hardwork and content! I always enjoy reading your thoughts on our favourite black and white + sun and moon + 5813 + you-are-me-i-am-you couple💜🌙☀

@theblindjassassin I do apologize for taking such a long time to get back to you. But I didn't forget you.

Everything you wrote is just IT.

You are not delusional. We here, us, are not delusional.

Those parts of the fandom that love calling us that, they are either colour blind (can't see the rainbow), or delusional themselves wishing upon a non existent romantic relationship between either JK or JM and another member (never happened, ain't happening, and ain't ever going to happen).

I'm happy you did put your thoughts to paper, so to speak, because it's lovely to read these kind of posts every once in a while, helps us refocus, remember, reminiscence.

#ask #jikook #kookmin #minkook #jungkook #jk #jimin #jm