#im currently driving home when this is scheduled to go out

[hashtagcaneven]

#blessed shitpost sunday yall #im currently driving home when this is scheduled to go out #so everyone behave until i get back #shitpost sunday #trigun #trigun shitpost #trigunshitpostsunday #millions knives #nicholas d wolfwood #trigun stampede #tristamp #kursed

[doobean]

FAMILY AFFAIRS - ISAGI YOICHI

synopsis: You've got everything in life. A happy marriage with the love of your life, a new job, and you have enough savings to buy a new house! Luckily enough, your kind stepbrother offers to come with you to the open house tour while your husband is busy and away. Nothing can go possibly wrong, right?

contents: explicit content, afab!fem!reader, stepbro!isagi, reader is married to sae, reader also wears a dress hehe, cheating, manipulation, dub-con, step cest, isagi is jealous and is a bully, kinda borderline yandere!isagi, hickeys, cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected sex, creampies, pet names/name-calling, dumbification, doggy/missionary/mating press, ass slapping, dacryphilia, light choking, having sex while on a phone call (oral), mirror sex, mdni word count: 3.9K a/n: part 1 of my kinktober event! idk probably the filthiest thing I've ever written in my life idk what to make of it but enjoy (im sorry sae whoops) and i swear im a good girl

Compared to how most remarriages go, you have to say that your family is part of the lucky ones.

It happened back in high school, where all the weird emotions and hormones of a teenager are at its high but, surprisingly, your stepbrother and stepfather were extremely easy-going people. And they still are. Your stepfather treats your mom with utmost care and grace, something you haven't seen in a while since your biological father stepped out of your life. 

Your stepbrother, now a pro football player, is almost a carbon copy. Growing up, Isagi has always been willing to help out around the house, staying up to help you study for exams throughout undergrad and, even now, he's offering to come with you to do something that'll take up half of his off day. 

"Hey," You shut your phone after sending a brief message to your husband as Isagi hops into the driver’s seat, hair slightly damp and wearing an oversized hoodie with a pair of sweats as he had just gotten out of the shower. "Thanks for coming with me, you didn’t have to."

Your stepbrother shrugs his shoulders in response as he adjusts the side and rearview mirrors before starting the ignition. "I’ve got nothing going on today. Besides," Isagi eyes you playfully and pinches your exposed thighs between your dress leg slits. "Who knows what might happen if I let you go off by yourself?"

You return the favor with a light slap over his head, earning a loud yelp from the male. "It’s just an open house tour, not like I’m going off to war."

He scoffs cheekily, fixing his hair. "Yeah, but the realtor could be a serial killer or worse—" Isagi leans towards you and lowers his voice. "—an undercover clown."

You shrink, back pressing against the car door, and laugh. "The only undercover clown I see here is you.”

"You’re so lame." Isagi huffs before stepping on the gas pedal.

After a quick game of rock, paper, and scissors over who gets possession of the aux, he begrudgingly accepts defeat and allows you to play everything but country. When he manages to get on the highway, he speaks again, turning down the music volume just slightly. "What’s Sae up to these days? I hardly see him come to our family functions anymore."

You stop humming to the current song and break your gaze from the window. There's a small frown that forms, without you realizing it, and you bite your lips. "You know how his schedule usually is. Campaigns and interviews got him busier nowadays. But he should be landing home later." 

"Later today?" Isagi quirks a brow.

You nod, shifting in your seat. "Mhm, he said he’ll call me once the flight lands. Why?"

There’s a long pause before Isagi answers, shrugging his shoulders, and turns at the exit. "No reason."

The drive there is relatively smooth. You guys pass the time with quick snippets of what's going on in your lives since Isagi had just returned overseas from a match and, despite not really knowing the ins and outs of football that much, you're still willing to listen to whatever he's rambling on about. It's one of the small things that you adore about Isagi, he's shamelessly passionate about his career, and oddly enough, the conversation gives you a burst of energy. 

You shoot back with your own life updates, though a bit more mild and mundane to his travels and exciting goals. You briefly mention a new job promotion, your closest friends announcing their pregnancy, Sae's new ad campaigns, and all the other houses you've toured within the past three months. The current house you're viewing today seems promising and within Sae's expected pay range.

From what you've seen online, it's a three-story house built near the edge of a hill with an attached infinity pool, a masterchef-styled kitchen, and a private built-in gym. You don't really need all of that, but who are you to deny your husband's generosity? 

Isagi lets out a long whistle when he pulls up next to the realtor's car on the long, winding driveway. "You're seriously gonna be living here?" He seems to be in disbelief at the size and so are you. It's a lot bigger in person than what the pictures offer. 

"Maybe," You hop out of the car, brushing off any sort of dust collecting to your dress, and adjust your purse straps. "Hopefully, this will be the one."

While you didn’t think the realtor would be a creep, Isagi wasn’t wrong when he suggested tagging along. Upon entering the house, the realtor immediately makes an unwarranted comment about your figure, commenting on how nicely the dress hugs your body before offering his hand. Isagi intercepts smoothly by introducing himself as your boyfriend, which honestly came out of left field, but at least the realtor backed off for the remainder of the tour. After an hour of showcasing, the agent hands his business card to Isagi and nearly stumbles over his feet when leaving the property.

"Is he gone?"

Isagi pulls one of the curtains aside and nods. "Yeah, his car isn’t in the driveway anymore."

"Ugh, it’s a shame but at least the place is nice." You briefly snap a couple of photos of the living room and kitchen. "I think we might put in an offer by the end of the week."

"It's not too far from my place either," Isagi adds. He wanders around the kitchen some more, pulling the cabinet drawers open and playing with the faucets carefree now that the agent is out of sight. "Think I could crash here sometime?" He jokes.

"As much as I love having your annoying ass around, I think not." You giggle when a cute pout forms on his lips. "Okay, maybe like once a month." It's hard to say no to your stepbrother sometimes.

You meet up with him in the kitchen, hands gently gliding across the marble kitchen countertop and stopping when Isagi manages to pull out an unopened champagne bottle from the fridge. He waves it around for a bit before signaling at the glasses in the cupboards. 

Isagi bites his lips thoughtfully. "You wanna?" 

Why not? It's been quite the ride to get here and you like to think of this as an early celebration. You pull out two glasses and eagerly watch as Isagi opens the bottle. He fumbles a bit with the top and a good amount of the liquid starts spilling out, dripping over the countertop and onto the floor.

"Shit, wait let me clean that up—" He rushes to grab a nearby towel though you beat him to it with your own pair of napkins from your purse.

"It's okay, I've got it, Yoichi." You start to bend down but he grabs a hold of your wrist, forcing you back up. 

"No," His tone is firm and you could've sworn there's something fleeting that flashes across his eyes for a moment. "Let me take care of it." 

And for whatever reason, you let him. "Alright..."

Isagi takes his time cleaning up the spill. He's careful like that, maybe because he knows you're insistent on buying this property. Knowing him, he wants to make sure everything is perfect. 

His hands stop when it reaches your shoes and you feel your breath catching in your throat. The sight of him on his knees triggers a reaction you can't quite understand. You shove the thoughts away and cough loud enough once you notice him hesitating. 

"Is there something wrong?" Your voice comes out faint, almost breathy. 

"It got on your dress," Isagi states casually, lifting his head to meet your confused gaze. "Mind if I get that for you?" He whispers the last part as if there's a hidden intention behind his words. 

You're not sure if your dress got wet. You're positive that nothing spilled on it. But, according to your kinder-spirited stepbrother, there are a few spots and you suppose it'll be bad to leave it unattended. 

"Sure," You answer on instinct.

"That's good," Isagi begins dabbing the cloth gently against the fabric, slowly making his way up until he's hovering over your pelvis. 

You have no idea why you're starting to feel yourself burn all over the place. It feels like Isagi is taking mental pictures of your figure, storing them all in his head as you feel his eyes trace your skin. Goosebumps start trailing down your arms and you shift your legs together. "Yoichi—"

Isagi stops his motions and tips his head down, letting his bangs fall over his eyes. He lets the towel fall to the floor and you twitch when you begin to feel his callous palms hiking all the way up your legs. It's strangely hypnotic, watching your stepbrother do this and you're not sure why you're allowing it to happen. Everything begins to feel hazy, surreal, and wrong. 

Your gut twists on itself inside out when his fingers toy with the waistband of your panties. Surely, there are some champagne spills there? Right? Maybe that's why you feel comfortable spreading your legs for him to clean it up. The two of you silently exchange dazed glances when you guide his hands, brushing the panties to the side of your legs as your heat gains exposure to the air.

"Gotta clean this one too," He rasps out. And you take a deep, shuddering breath when Isagi's lips latch onto your folds, wasting no time with his tongue. You feel like your heart is going to pound out of your chest.

A thousand questions flood through your mind. Has he always viewed you this way? How are you going to present this to Sae? Should you even say anything to your husband at this point? They're the wrong questions to be focusing on, you know that better than anyone. In a split second, your healthy relationship with Isagi has opened so many cracks around its edges that it's now something completely irreparable. 

And you're ashamed of just how goddamn good this feels. 

"You're so sweet down here." Isagi's eyes are half-lidded when he looks up at you, already seemingly drunk off of you. 

Your eyes threaten to flutter shut as his tongue traces around, larping up your intoxicating slick. Isagi lets out a low groan when your fingers run through his hair, gripping it just slightly forward enough to allow his nose to brush against your aching nerve.

All of this comes crashing down when a familiar ringtone goes off. You nearly jump at the rapid vibrations from your purse and hastily fish out your phone, heart dropping at the contact that's on the screen. 

"Pick it up, I'll be quiet." The way that easily comes out of his mouth makes you want to throw up.

You swallow back a moan and clench the phone tight in your hands. "Yoichi, I'm being serious...! If he finds out we're both dead!"

"Then make me."

His hot breath hovers over your clit as he looks up, masking his ill intentions behind his seemingly big, innocent eyes. Those very same eyes that would comfort you after a bad day, the same eyes that shine whenever you told him about an achievement—no matter how big or small—, and the very same eyes that are now clouded with something more sinister as he searches for an answer in your own pair.

"If you don't want it then push me away. Make up your mind or else Sae's gonna be worried." Isagi mocks your voice when attempting to say your husband's name. The way it rolls off his tongue makes your stomach churn and the wedding band on your hand suddenly feels unbearably tight.

You shouldn't. You know better. You're in love with Sae Itoshi and this—whatever this is—needs to stop.

"You're turning into a mess down here, sis." You attempt to close your legs together but his grip is like iron. Isagi tilts his head to the side and huffs over your nub. "I said push me, baby."

"Y-Yoi—" Your words get stuck in your throat as he 'accidentally' brushes his lips against your heat. Another dark glint flashes across his eyes and he grins.

You pick up the call and clear your throat, but your free hand wanders to your stepbrother's head, giving him the slightest nudge so that his nose brushes against your slick heat.

"Hi babe, how is everything?" You're trying so hard to level your voice.

"Just landed," Sae replies. There are muffled voices in the background, which you assume are his bodyguards and paparazzi. After some awkward shuffling, he asks, "Are you at the property right now?"

"Yeah," You continue to tug at Isagi's hair, suppressing a moan when he flicks his tongue a bit too hard over your sensitive nub. "It's spacious and has a nice backyard, I—I think you'll like it." You're beginning to pant, almost whining, under your stepbrother's touch. 

"Mhm, send over pictures when you can. Is Isagi with you right now?"

You nearly choke out a sob as his fingers begin to edge their way inside. "Y-Yes!" You sputter out, launching forward as your knees begin to grow weak.

"Hey, are you okay?"

You can't stop the twitching and bucking of your legs. Isagi notices and wraps a free arm around the back of your legs, keeping you upright and pressed against his face. "I-I'm fine, why?" You breathe out.

"You sound like you're sick." Sae is concerned. Concerned for your well-being while you are currently getting fingered by your stepbrother. 

You almost cry when you feel Isagi’s fingers slip out of your sloppy folds. He gets up from his knees, gripping your waist as you stumble forward from the loss in pleasure, and grabs a hold of your phone. As if he's playing a game, Isagi holds up a finger to his lips, silently asking you to keep quiet. It’s almost scary how fast you see him transition from being an absolute monster to back to being your loving stepbrother all in a second. 

Even with his mouth covered in your slick, he clears his throat and speaks with confidence to Sae. "She's feeling a bit down now but I'll drive her back once we're done."

"Is that so?" Sae lets out a heavy sigh. "Thanks, Isagi. I should be back before dinner so keep me updated."

"Anytime, we'll see you later!" Isagi grins over the line before twisting his head down at you. "Sis, do you have anything else to say?" There is it. That look again. His smile sends shivers down your legs as he presses the device to your ear, rubbing it firmly against the side of your face. 

You can't find the power within you to break free from Isagi's taunting gaze. The way his lips grow wider as fear washes over yours makes you only fall for his touch just more. It's almost addicting as much as it's wrong.

"I love you, Sae." You force out the words and your stepbrother has the audacity to laugh.

Thankfully, Sae doesn't hear it. "I love you too. I'll talk to you guys later." And the line drops.

Isagi doesn't give you time to recollect your thoughts as he plunges his fingers back into your warmth. Your body staggers under him, hips matching his feverous rhythm, throwing the last of your morals out the window.

"Oh my god—!"

"You love him, yeah?" He hums in the crook of your neck and presses his hardened length against your plush thighs. "Love him more than me?" Isagi coos.

You throw your head into his chest, eyes shut tight, and inhale his stimulating scent. "I love him, y-yes I do...!" You fumble over the words and make a mournful sound.

"Is that so? Well, it doesn't matter either way—" Isagi drags you easily in his arms to the bedroom and positions himself behind you while facing the full-body mirror by the closet. "—because you're going to be screaming out my name." He pulls down your dress straps and starts leaving hungry, sloppy kisses across your neck and shoulder blades.

A shaky breath escapes your lips and you shut your eyes, tilting your head to the side, allowing him even more access. "Yoi..."

"Look at yourself, sis." His sudden sharp tone makes your eyes shoot up. His sweatpants fall down around his thighs and you see him stroking his thick length in the mirror. Isagi presses it against your increasingly wet folds, groaning from how easily your body accepts him, and gives your ass a harsh slap. "Watch how I fuck you."

You can barely recognize yourself in the mirror. Lipstick smeared, tears pooling at your eyes from a mixture of pleasure and guilt, dress straps slipping off your flushed shoulders, and the numerous amounts of hickeys from your stepbrother marred against your skin. And you still have that damn wedding ring on.

Isagi sucks his teeth in as he watches your chest rise and fall when he slowly enters you. The feeling is different compared to Sae's. 

Your stepbrother's cock is thicker and angled more to the right, hitting and stretching out spots that you didn't know existed. Once you bottom him out, Isagi pulls back his hips before snapping them back into place. Just one thrust from him is enough to knock the air out of you. He keeps repeating the motion until you're a writhing mess and a puddle from your heat collects onto the hardwood floor.

"A-Ah—w-wait fuckfuckfuck...!"

Isagi snatches your face in his hand and pulls you up against his chest, making his cock nest deeper into your velvety walls. "Visit me often, yeah? It's not fair that he gets to fuck this pretty pussy every day."

You let out a muffled moan when Isagi collides his lips against yours, his tongue immediately seeking refuge in your mouth. Everything feels so hazy, so intense, nothing like this reminds you of how sweet and gentle Isagi usually treats you.

"Baby," He breathes, relocating his hand on your face to your neck, he gives it a tender squeeze. "I'm better, aren't I?" Isagi lets out a whine when he feels your insides tightening up around him. 

Your eyes are glossed over, drool seeping out from the edge of your mouth as you mumble, "I—I don’t know… I’m—aaah…”

"Huh? What was that?" He pulls back, keeping the tip in, and chuckles when he watches your face twist in disappointment at the loss of feeling. "Say it and I'll give you what you want."

Isagi watches your reflection, paying close attention to the way your lips quiver at your next words. It's almost as if he's getting off at seeing your internal conflict with tears sticking hot against your lashes. Finally, you give in. "Y-You're better, Yoichi... you fill me up more than Sae..."

His eyes widen with glee. "That's what I fucking thought." Within seconds, he adjusts his grip on your hips and snaps back into your puffy folds. "If he ever makes you cry, you know your big brother is going to take care of you, right? No one can take care of you like I can."

You catch your breath when his toned biceps lift you in his arms. The second your back meets the mattress, his length stretches your hot entrance again. 

"Shit, it's like you're made for me," Your legs hang limp over his shoulders as he presses deeper. "You take me in so good."

You pant uncontrollably under him, wanting to start sentences but being unable to finish as his thrusts and the lewd wet sounds from your heat bounce off the walls. You can tell by the dark look in Isagi's eyes that he relishes in the feeling of making you feel overwhelmed and stimulated. Every time when you call out his name, when your moans are forced out by his animalistic thrusts, he clenches his grip harder around you. 

"Get on your knees, baby," Isagi coos and he lets out a dark chuckle when you obediently nod.

You struggle to get on all fours, lower body shaken to its core from the intense raw pleasure. You’re taken aback when you see the sheer amount of sweat and other bodily fluids that stain the mattress sheets beneath you. While you're brain is trying to process how on earth you guys are going to clean this up, Isagi has taken hostage your hips again, lifts your dress up, and is already repositioning himself from behind. With a swift swipe of his tip, he claims his territory once again. 

"Fuck," He hisses, watching the plump of your ass jiggle at every thrust he makes. His other hand twists underneath you, digits finding their home on your clit. "You make the sweetest sounds, you know that?" 

A familiar coil builds in your stomach. A feeling that has brought you and Sae closer dozens of times before. Only, this time, you feel yourself about to come undone by the hands of a different man. As his fingers work their final motion around your throbbing clit, your vision turns foggy, and your body slumps onto the mattress as your orgasm washes over you. Isagi groans as your walls fluctuate and squeeze desperately around his length, sending him close to his own ending. 

His fingers dig deep into the flesh of your ass, leaving half-crescent moons, as he pumps streaks of white inside and pulls out immediately, allowing some to finish dribbling out on your back. The sight of you spasming with the combination of both your and his fluids spewing out causes him to moan in delight.

"Once a month, right?" He repeats your earlier promise, hot breath ticking your wet skin. When he realizes that you're too dumb-fucked to respond back, he reaches over and attempts to wipe the sweat collecting on your face. His normal bright smile comes back and it's like nothing has changed. "Let's get ready to meet up with Sae."

There's a heavy shift in the air when dinner arrives. 

Isagi had graciously offered his hoodie to cover up the hickeys, knowing damn well that your husband is going to see them regardless when you return to your shared apartment. Still, Isagi believes he's still doing his due diligence as a good stepbrother.

You're sitting across from Sae and have been avoiding both males' gazes throughout the evening. From the second you sat down, to the moment Sae kissed your cheek, it felt so hard to breathe. You're not sure if Isagi is helping or making the situation worse by rubbing his hand back and forth on your thigh. 

It's almost an hour into dinner and you've only taken three bites and are on your third glass of wine. Being the attentive husband he is, Sae picks up on your uneasiness and sets down his fork.

"Everything alright?" Sae eyes the two of you across the table.

"Yeah," Isagi speaks for you and curls an arm around your shoulder. "She's just feeling under the weather, remember?" 

You're too overwhelmed by everything going on, so you lean into his touch, hands gripping your thighs in the process like you're trying to crush something, knuckles white and fingertips bruising. 

You hate how going back to your husband's arms after this, talking about your future together, and potentially starting a family—all of it seems like it's the most daunting feeling in the world.

KINKTOBER TAGLIST (PART I)

@milkistoshi @mareonyan @saenora @blissblossom @wowonamo

#doobean:kinktober23 #bllk smut #bllk #blue lock smut #blue lock #blue lock x reader #isagi yoichi #isagi yoichi x reader #isagi yoichi smut #whoops sorry my fingers slipped #cw: cheating #im sorry sae ... #i love u #cw: stepcest #doobean writes

[he4rtsforjoao]

PART WAYS ꕥ João Felix

Warnings: bunch of angst?

Description: João thinks it’s best to stay away from each other.

Pairings: João Felix x F!Reader

Author note: I’m back😝 send in those requestssssss

『••✎••』

From the very beginning, both you and João were fully aware of the ramifications that came with being in a relationship. João's frequent travels to play matches out of town and your demanding job as an actress made it nearly impossible for you to be there for him during his games. As much as you longed to support him wholeheartedly, the reality was that you had to prioritize your filming commitments, even if it meant sacrificing being by João's side. There were moments where João would plead you to give up your acting career entirely, after seeing all his teammates girlfriends/wife’s be there to support them. Yet, deep down, you knew that you couldn't yield to his requests. You had invested countless years of hard work and dedication to reach the position you were in, and surrendering it all over a single demand was simply inconceivable.

You were currently on the set of a new popular series where you played the lead role. You were aware that João had an important game scheduled today, but due to the numerous retakes you had to endure, you could hardly find a moment to sneak away and catch a glimpse of the game or even send him a text to inquire about his progress. When you finally wrapped up on set around 1 am the first thing you did was check your phone, you were surprised to find zero messages from João, especially since you had sent one earlier at 3 pm before the game had even begun. You reached out to your contact and persistently dialed his number until he answered on the final ring. "Hello?" His tired voice pierced through the phone "Hey, how did the game go today? I wasn't able to catch much of it." He hummed, pausing briefly before responding, "Yeah, it was alright. We managed to secure a victory, 1-0." A smile showed up on your face.

"That's good news, isn't it? Why do you sound so down?" You inquire, noticing the lackluster tone in his voice. "I'm not sure, y/n. I've been contemplating some things," he responds, causing anxiety to surge within you as you enter your car and lock the doors. "About what?" You probe, flipping on the engine but remaining stationary, not daring to drive until you uncover the specifics of his concerns. He pauses once more, exhaling a heavy sigh into the phone, "I'm uncertain. Something in our relationship has been weighing me. I just don't see us progressing any further. You're stuck in your acting career, that even when I'm home, we barely see each other before you leave to go film. As for me, constantly jetting around the globe, you can't even join me for a game." You braced yourself, knowing this conversation was unlikely to conclude on a positive note.

“I know João, but you also have to know I do try my best to support you, even if my career seem to always stand in the way. And I know you have always told me countless of times to just quit cause I have you to help me, but what you don’t seem to comprehend is the part where im not at that point where I want to let my career go already“ your palms began to sweat, as you become increasingly anxious

“see y/n this is what I’m talking about. You don’t seem to try to put effort into this and it kills me. That’s why I just think it’s better we end this relationship for the best of us. Right now it isn’t a perfecting timing and we need to let that sink in..” he pauses for a moment “I have to go bye” before you could even share your thoughts on all of this, he abruptly ends the call, leaving you stunned by the rapidity of it all.

#joao felix angst #joao felix smut #joao felix fluff #joao felix x reader #joao felix #fluff #smut #angst #football imagines #soccer player x reader #world cup imagines #football x reader #joão felix imagines

[spadesolace]

leading lady - vlog 1 🎬: im siblings bonding time

previous | next

📀 clip 1

it was the wee hours of the morning, a red eye flight and clearly nayeon’s face is still a bit swollen. the view shows nayeon in the passenger seat and her manager driving, as she’s scrolling on her phone. 

violet: she’s probably looking for a song to play

a song plays in a low volume as to not get copyright striked despite it being the song of her labelmates. nayeon waves at the camera with her gummy smile.

“hello, i’m currently on my way back home.” nayeon leans forward to the camera, a smile on her face, clearly still tired from her flight. 

violet: NAYTIONS CHEER!

“i’ve been gone for at least an entire month?” nayeon looks at her manager for confirmation.

manager caption: yeah, you’ve been gone for a month.

“i was with y/n for half of it but she finished her schedule early.” she yawns, stretching her arms a bit, one could see the sun rising from the back as the drive continues on.

“anywho, today’s agenda is to surprise y/n. she doesn’t know i’m back and i bought her gifts. so, i’ll wake her up and we’ll have a sibling bonding day!” the camera cuts off and nayeon can be seen sleeping soundly with soft music in the background.

violet: sleep well unnie~

📀 clip 2

the sound of a door opening and the soft footsteps of nayeon can be heard. the lights aren’t on except for the sunlight coming from the window. the camera points to the digital clock on the kitchen counter that perfectly shows it was only 7 in the morning, on a saturday.

“she’s still asleep in her room, i’ve hidden the gift in my walk-in closet so she won’t know.” nayeon slowly opens the door to y/n’s room, it was dark with little hints of sunlight peeking in. one could make out the sleeping figure, some would find it creepy to see y/n’s entire body being stiff as a board and straight.

the camera was placed on the study table on the side. having a clear view of y/n’s entire room. nayeon had removed all her outer layer clothes, leaving her in a shirt and jeans. any sane person would just shake anyone to wake them up, but this was nayeon and y/n. a very chaotic duo.

next thing you see is nayeon jumping onto y/n’s sleeping figure and hugging her tight.

“AH SH-” the clip was then cut short.

📀 clip 3

the siblings are sitting on the kitchen counter, nayeon is holding an ice pack to y/n’s shoulder. the younger im was still sleepy, trying her best to keep her eyes open.

“y/n, unnie is sorry.”

violet: that surprise was a total bust.

“mhmm… welcome home, loser.” y/n leaned towards nayeon, who was still holding an ice pack.

“since when did your voice get so deep?”

“i just woke up…”

violet: unnie, pabo.

📀 clip 4

nayeon is back in the car, still a passenger princess with kookeu on her lap as y/n drives them to wherever destination her sister had in mind. it was a bit quiet and y/n no longer looks hurt from the incident in the previous clip.

“it’s already 1 in the afternoon… i fell asleep after i woke y/n up.” nayeon showed her phone screen that showed the time, it was almost 2 in the afternoon.

“i cooked breakfast but we never got that in camera.” y/n glanced at the vlog, a shy smile on her face opposite to nayeon’s bright gummy smile.

“i told you i could have cooked us breakfast.”

“after the whole oil incident, unnie? no.”

the whole ride is just them bickering about nayeon’s cooking skills and how y/n always cooks for them. to which nayeon is just left speechless with the amount of cooking clips of y/n has on the internet.

the scene from the background changes as y/n parks the car in what seems to be han river. 

nayeon had picked up the camera, filming y/n go out of the car and heading to the trunk. it seems that the siblings decided to have a picnic. it wasn’t that crowded at han river but there were a few people looking at them as they walked further along looking for a spot.

“it’s been a while since we went out, just the two of us.” nayeon pointed the camera at y/n who is now wearing a mask.

“i have classes, so i won’t be able to keep up with your spontaneous adventures.” the older im hummed as they kept on walking.

a b-roll started playing with nayeon’s song playing in the background, some of which was y/n running with kookeu, the sky and scenery, and nayeon fixing y/n’s hair.

“you never told me how your classes are going.” y/n shrugged as she pets kookeu who is now sleeping soundly on the picnic mat.

“OH- I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU!”

violet: oops, sorry, have to cut this part. it’s something that only we can talk about

📀 clip 5

they’re back at y/n’s place, chilling in the living room as nayeon leaves the frame.

“hello, vlog. it’s been a while since i showed myself here. nayeon-unnie just went to get something in her closet-“

soft footsteps rushed in as kookeu jumped onto y/n’s lap and nayeon following behind holding a paper bag with the logo censored.

“i got you this.” y/n looked inside the paper bag only to look back up at nayeon. face in awe as she pulled out the small box of headphones.

“HOW DID YOU?! THANK YOU!” a face of accomplishment and y/n’s smile growing wider as she hugs the box close to her.

“you mentioned your old ones broke and you haven’t bought one so… i got you one while i was in the states.” y/n hugged nayeon tightly as kookeu barked at being crushed by the two sisters.

“ok that’s a sign we’ve reached the end of the vlog. kookeu wants some alone time with us and someone is tired after being woken up early in the morning. BYE~” nayeon waves at the camera as y/n does the same thing, yawning a bit as she leans towards nayeon.

“bye naytion~”

📀bonus clip

“why do you have a script with you?” nayeon looks at  y/n as she walks around trying her best to act out the scene she’s been reading.

“the auditions for the play are in a couple of days and i got tasked to act in some of the scenes for those auditioning.” y/n skimmed the script quickly as wonyoung got in frame.

“you’re really doing this while we’re on break?” wonyoung could only laugh at her friend who was diligently reading the script and writing a few things.

“oh come on, just help me out wony. you don’t have to act it out. just read them with how you think the conversation would go.” wonyoung and y/n were in their shoot for miu miu and nayeon just came to visit the pair.

“tell us about the play then?” wonyoung is seen reading the script as y/n looks at the camera, preparing to explain the entire play.

“long story short, it follows the story of claire who won this event where she spends an entire week with her celeb crush. there’s drama, romance, comedy, and just overall a blast.” nayeon nodded in approval as she took y/n’s script and showed the title to the camera.

“this might be your first acting gig.” nayeon teased as wonyoung laughed at the comment, finally agreeing to practice with y/n.

“THANK YOU, WONY!”

violet: sorry, unnie!

taglist:

@awkwardtoafault @justme-idle @1luvkarina @bearyanon @khaepriv @lesleepyyy @yoontoonwhs @sserajeans @pandafuriosa60 @mightymyo @haerinkisser

#newjeans x reader #newjeans imagines #newjeans #kim minji newjeans #kim minji x reader #kim minji #minji x reader #newjeans minji #newjeans smau #nwjns #minji fluff #minji scenarios #minji smau #nwjns smau #twice #nayeon #leading lady smau

[carrickbender]

7

1. I'm sitting here drinking coffee, but I should be doing chores. It's a nice day, bug wants to do stuff later, there's email to catch up on... so yeah, do weeks really end?

2. Friday night was fantastic: got off work, listened to my mothers epic complaining while I took the flat tire off of her old suv, lost my phone, took it to town to be fixed only to find my phone on the bumper(IT WENT 10 MILES ON THE BUMPER AT 65+ MPH TO TOWN!!!!! PRAISE ALL THE GODS IT STAYED!!!!), got the tire fixed and back on the car in a very bad spot, went home, buggy got sick and I had to clean up his #2 mess<poor guy>, and I slept on the couch because sleeping is awful in a bed anymore. Great start, huh?

3. My current shame storm is making a hurricane look like a passing shower. No matter what I do, what I accomplish, how hard I try, it's just not enough. It's a stupid thing, and no matter how much I try to do the affirmations, they aren't working. #backtosquareone

4. I have a drs appointment tomorrow, and I'm dreading it. I've gained 5 lbs(or so my messed up scale says), but my pants fit better, so I dunno. Plus, there's the pain in other places thanks to fluid build up. Just another fun thing that's happened since I had bypass surgery. #insulttoinjury

5. I think after a certain age you should be able to trade certain things that still work on your body for things that would be more useful. For example, I'd gladly trade my still working sex drive for the ability to thrive on 3-4 hours a night of sleep. That way I could trade one useless thing for a useful thing. Pardon me for being slightly bitter. Im just over it. To be honest I wish I was working the 60-70 hour a week schedule and going to school like I was before. At least then I wouldn't think about it as much. #thanksihateit

6. My former employer is having a big meeting w/investors and politicians on the 25th, and theres rumours it might start back up. So im sending the HR manager my updated resume, and starting the conversation about a shift supervisor position. To be honest, I'd kill for it, and it would keep me on career trajectory. Fingers crossed.... I love my new job but I can't afford to work there.

7. I'm sorry to be such a negative person but I'm kinda reaching a hard spot in my journey. I have no real time to stop and process because if I did I think it would derail part of the rebuilding process for my life I started a few years ago. Part of that rebuilding process was prioritizing financial security, so even considering all the other stuff has to take a backseat... but how to do it when you're a novice at self care and are trying to reprogram your already f'ed up brain is another thing entirely. Bono wrote it best in the song Cedars of Lebanon: "The worst of us are a long drawn out confession; The best of us are geniuses of compression.You say you're not going to leave the truth alone.I'm here 'cause I don't want to go home".

Thanks for letting me vent. This week will be better... I think. Much love!

#me #this is my life #dadlife #exhausted #in repair #self healing #good enough #gastric bypass

[dausy]

Well I've been daily updating twitter ofcourse. I kind of at the last moment decided I was going to do a daily doodle thing. I did this years ago, where I drew something every day for a year. I'm not doing a full illustration this time just really simple, essentially a couple lines and thats it. Just to help the creative juices flowing. I probably wont stick it out for an entire year but I keep getting myself backed up into an artistic corner and I want to back back out of it and find a new corner. Instead while I've been doing that, I've also been using it as an excuse to update the status of my current ailment.

so essentially, I had already self-diagnosed myself with the flu but I did go ahead and made an urgent care appointment on Saturday (?). I will say that I normally get a flu shot, every year, I did not get one this year. Next year I will definitely be getting one. I definitely got this from my coworkers and theres was like 3x milder than mine. My immune system was not prepared.

I did not want to physically go to urgent care because I didn't feel safe driving. I was super short of breath and I felt very drunk (because its in my ears! my ears are messed up). Also, didn't want to sit in a waiting room when sitting up sounded like a lot of effort and besides, what is urgent care going to tell me that I dont already know? viruses are treated with rest and fluids and thats it. However, I assumed my boss was going to be on top of me for some sort of a work note even though I'm not a full time employee and I dont feel like I should need one but I had agreed to work on monday and if I called in she'd probably pitch a fit. I discovered, thanks to the local spouse groups, that there was a local mobile urgent care. They came to my house! I schedule an appointment and they came out about an hour later. The most convenient thing ever. They apparently didn't take my insurance so they charged me 179$ out of pocket but I wasn't going to complain. I didn't have to go anywhere. I could track the MA on gps and they sent me his photo so I didn't "have to be scared" lmao. It was all very nice.

I had already tested myself for covid and it was negative. I was tempted to start myself on prednisone (because I practically have an entire pharmacy at home) but HR was a good 115 and adding steroid to that sounded not fun. Normally my HR runs 60s if Im calm and 80s if Im stressed. 115 with steroids on board didn't sound like fun. My 02 was dropping to 93 when I was up and walking around but it would go back up to the high 90s. This poor MA came with a laptop that virutally connected to a PA and they were like "what do you want me to do for you?" like I guess I mainly just wanted to make sure that I was safe to be at home and I have evidence I saw some sort of healthcare person as proof.

I oddly enough didn't have much of a cough until about yesterday. I was feeling short of breath and when I did cough I'd cough gunk up but mainly it just hurt to cough but it wasn't frequent at all. Now I'm coughing alot. The worst part was the hot/cold flashes. I completely drenched the bed in sweat. I've never seen that much water come off of me. I literally touched the valley of my stomach and it was a puddle. I splished my hands in it. I would alternate between uncontrollable sweating to then freezing to death. I thought I'd be over it and I washed all my linens yesterday and then last night, just sweat everywhere. Which was annoying because I felt....nagged..?..guilttripped? to go into work today by my boss. Like I was faking it..I couldnt possibly be sick that long(my coworkers recovered in 2 days)..maybe I was crazy and I wasn't sick?

so I did! I WENT TO WORK TODAY. My coworkers were actually fine. They said they were actually surprised they handled things well without me. I'm simultaneously proud of them and really aggravated that I went in. Because I really did feel terrible. I realized real fast how weak I was and my brain was not functioning. I even gave myself the easiest roll I could where I was off in a corner away from people and I was struggling. I was struggling to walk and I was struggling to stand. My partner at work let me know how bad I looked too. I apparently looked like a frail old lady. Which was nice.

So I went home. My boss is like "wait where you going?". I guess in her defense she came equipped with a bunch of throat lozenges for me but I didn't have a sore throat. I have no energy and cant breath. So I'm going home. I dont work tomorrow btw.

#healthcareworkers #imsick8( #dailydoodle #artblog

[confessionsofketamine]

I asked if you are ok, and you clearly aren’t. I’m trying to heal from surgery and although you are doing the dishes and cooking for yourself and actually taking the trash out, you have given me nothing. No hugs. No kisses. No asking how I’m doing or how I’m healing. Wait. You asked once after I got home from the hospital and couldn’t stop crying because of what happened, but you have avoided me ever since. My supposed best friend lying instead of coming to see me, and my husband avoiding me. You won’t meditate with me, you won’t color with me. You won’t let me sit with you in silence. You won’t tell me how many ketamine pills you have left from your current prescription even tho I know you are probably short. You won’t tell me how we are going to pay our bills next month because you don’t know. All this time I believed you would stand up and say NO we aren’t going to sink..but you never stand up. I have no more money left to pay the credit card bills, and you haven’t gone to work, or even tried. I know you’re sick and I’ve been trying so hard to help you but you won’t let me and I don’t know what the fuck to do.

You don’t even want to be around me. You spend 5 minutes with me a day, and you tiptoe around to avoid seeing me. I asked for help to change my bandage and you waited for 20 minutes before you even came to do it, and then you did it so fast and just left and didn’t even help me up like last time. It’s hard to get up and you haven’t even been here to see it. Or to help me. You haven’t asked about my sleep, or about my pain. You don’t care.

You scheduled band practice at our home, 9 days after I got out of the hospital and one of them brought their kids and although I love babysitting, and told you to just have them stay inside with me, but you never even gave me the courtesy of knowing we were having guests. I was laying down in bed trying to recover when I had to get up and get the door because you were still sleeping and I had no idea we were hosting anyone. Then once I woke you up, you left him in the house with ME while you did whatever you were doing before you were ready for him. Like the audacity dude?! And then I had to get up and get the door two more times only to find one of them had kids in tow?? A simple text message letting me know shit got flipped around and practice was here this week. That’s all it would have taken. I’m not hard to please. But I got nothing. Never even a thank you for waking you up for your own event.

Having this surgery has shown me how truly alone I am. And I don’t know how long I can keep going this way. You just keep pushing me away and I’m trying to be strong for us, and for all our history, but what are you doing right now?!

It’s like we are together in a big ship, headed for a an ice wall. You are driving the ship. I can’t jump into the ocean because I’ll instantly die and drown. I can’t take the reigns because I don’t know how to drive and I can’t learn in the amount of time we have. So I just have to hold on and watch us crash and it fucking sucks. It sucks so bad and I miss you.

I don’t want you to be on ketamine anymore. I don’t think it’s helping. Im afraid it’s making things worse and I don’t think you’re going to agree with me. I think you’re going to fight me on it, you’re going to tell me all the good it’s doing for you, but all that glitters isn’t gold. It’s poisoning you, and it’s making you into someone I don’t know anymore. It’s making you into someone you don’t know anymore. You don’t remember anything. You don’t want to be around anyone. You just want to do what you want to do when you want to do it.

Someone once told me to never let anyone dull my sparkle. But who cares about my sparkle anymore? The person who told me that forgot I exist and dropped off the face of the earth and stopped calling me back, and then stopped calling me at all. And it’s family. How sad is that. Here I sit, all these years later, losing about 4-5 lbs a month, my hair falling out anytime I run my fingers through it, and I’ve got no sparkle left. They still haven’t biopsied the mass on my thyroid. They don’t care. No one really does. Maybe a few people. My only cord of existence to this world. The very few people and animals that keep me here. The very few that care. I stay for them, because I don’t want to hurt them. Even tho it hurts me. I don’t want to hurt them more.

I can’t believe this is my life and that I have to just lay here and tolerate it and watch it go by. I have to just accept that you’re going thru something so I have to go through all of my stuff alone because you don’t have the space for me. I’ve been starting to wonder if this is all too much for you. Maybe you are regretting your decision of saying “I Do”. Getting married and getting a mortgage. Maybe you don’t want this life anymore and you’re too afraid to tell me, so you just string me along, knowing how it’s going to end while I blindly follow. Just watching you, watching us headed toward the ice wall.

I’m losing hope.

#ketamine #marriage #hard times

[axesilly]

i cant afford therapy so im going to talk about my troubles on here because i dont know what else to do 👍 i dont know if this will reach anyone but it might make me feel better. sorry if its a bit lengthy, ive had these feelings for a while

for the sake of anonymity and my own safety i will not be mentioning any names of people, towns, or schools :]

so im in college, im an art major. im from a small town with nothing to do except go to a mall the next town over and im going to college in another small town 5 hours away from home. this small town also has jack shit to do unless you drive 45 minute to an hour away. im currently in my spring semester of my freshman year and i have gotten so absolutely mentally and physically drained since i got a fast food job. i got a job making pizzas at yknow one of those big chain corporations pizza places, and the store i work at has only been open a few months. its absolutely chaotic and no one knows how to do anything except a few select people. my boss, the general manager, also doesnt know how to do anything because its his first time doing something like this. one of the other managers also only works there because hes friends with the general manager and he is not the greatest person, as he tends to sexually harrass the staff including a friend i made there. now ive already put in my two weeks last saturday, but that doesnt take away from how drained this job has made me.

Since the spring semester started ive been constantly piled with work (one week i was scheduled 6 days in a row when i had a big project to work on, i had a breakdown at work to my general manager), writing assignments, and project after project. (not even kidding my drawing professor gives us a new project the same day we turn one in) in my senior year of high school i loved fine arts and i believed that i wanted to follow in my art teachers footsteps and pursue my love of art and make art for my career. and while i do still love fine arts and making art, i just cannot do this constantly. since just before my spring break i started not going to my classes as consistently and i swore to myself i would start going again after the break. well that break just made it worse it seems because everything has just gone more and more downhill. i have still been missing classes because some days its difficult to get out of bed and i do not have the motivation to go to class just to sit there and not be able to pay attention for an hour/hour and a half. im behind on a project for one of my classes because i havent gone since ive been back from spring break (two weeks). i have an exam for one of my classes soon and im not even close to prepared. i had a 3 page essay due last night i started but havent finished (luckily i can turn it in a little late). it may sound lazy but these are my real struggles with my mental health. i feel trapped here. i do have a license and a car, i do have transportation so i can go places, but its such an old car it has so many problems (one which has arisen recently being if i stop somewhere and turn my car off, it wont crank back up immediately and i have to wait 10-15 minutes, and once it is on i have to revv it to make sure it stays on). so because of car problems and currently living in a small town im frustrated because it feels like i cant go anywhere to do anything fun. i feel trapped in my dorm and in my mind.

now comes the college problem. the college i go to currently is a nice school, i get 8 meals a week on my meal plan included in my tuition. theres several places to choose from the eat at, theres a gym, free health exams i think. but its driving me insane seeing the same old brick buildings every damn day. i currently dont have a roommate so im in a dorm by myself which probably contributes to this feeling of lonliness. i dont really have many friends, i had more last semester but they did not keep in touch. i do have one friend that i appreciate very much and she always worries and wants to help when she sees im upset. shes a real one. but seeing the same things, learning about the same repetitive lessons every single day, has driven me insane. my art history class has been the same topics since the start of the semester, its all been about works of art pertaining to jesus, and mary, and god and the angel telling mary shes pregnant and marys purity and this symbolizing that and i understand why its important to learn about these works of art and how they have shaped art today, but i cannot stand hearing the same things over and over. im not a christian, and i dont believe theres anything wrong with christianity as long as youre not hurting anyone with your beliefs, but these topics are so repetitive ever class i have. the semesters almost over and we havent even gotten to modern art yet, and in my opinion thats what truly matters to learn about because thats what we as artists would need to look at to have a reference for how we should make our art right? art is about expressing yourself and we need to see how others making art in the modern era are expressing themselves as well. and on the topic of expressing ourselves, my drawing class, every single project, my professor has us stick to such strict criteria. one of my projects my professor actually really liked, i liked, but she took points off because i had my girlfriends name written very small where you could barely even see, because we were not supposed to have any text. i feel like i cannot even be creative and truly express myself with these projects. i dont feel like i have any real freedom with them. i love fine arts and i love making art, but not when its like this. i want to be able to make my own art that actually expresses my feelings, not someone elses criteria. because of all of this my grades have been rapidly dropping.

now i have already made the decision weeks ago that i will not be returning to this school in the next fall semester. i discussed this with my mom already as she does the majority of my paperwork and things for this stuff. she wants me to transfer to a college closer to home so i can atleast get a general studies degree. but thats not what i want to do either. she told me not to flunk my classes this semester because that will make it difficult to transfer me to another school, but how do you expect me to get good grades when i constantly feel like im in hell in my mind. i mentioned wanting to maybe take a gap year, she doesnt want me to do that. school is horrible for my mental health like this, i dont understand why society thinks we should just have everything we want to do with the rest of our life figured out immediately out of high school. well i dont. and i dont want to stay in college immediately out of high school. i want to go live my life! me and my girlfriend are long distance (we have met in person several times and shes actually coming to visit me this month, but just seeing each other for a week at a time is not enough) and i really want to go live with her! i want to enjoy living and living with the person i love more than life itself! i currently dont feel like i can do that here or back home. i want to move somewhere else with my girlfriend so we can both be happy and love life. i want to move out of state to a slightly bigger city, nothing crazy like new york or atlanta, but just somewhere bigger than a small town with nothing to do whatsoever. i do have a place in mind but im not going to say where. and when i move, after a year i can qualify for in state tuition and pursue something that makes me happier. ive always loved animals and marine animals so i was thinking i could major in zoology and marine biology and work at an aquarium or something while im working on my degree. and i dont fully know how the paperwork and things work for transferring and such, especially after a break, so i could be in the wrong, but is it really wrong for wanting the best for myself?

and to be honest with myself i know exactly why im in college and its not to get a degree. i was raised constantly being compared to my siblings. my brother is trans (which my parents are very obviously not too fond of) dropped out of college and joined the military. my sister dropped out of college after a semester, got married to a horrible man who she just recently divorced after having two children with him. and being compared to them all my life, especially to my brother, made me want to be better than them. i wanted to be the one, as the youngest, to be the first one to get through college immediately, all four years, no problem. but its just too much for me. and dropping out, moving away, im terrified. im terrified that my parents will be disappointed in me. im terrified of that face my mother makes, that tone of voice, when shes disappointed in me for something. im terrified of getting lectured and told why everything i want is wrong. its irrational. and im terified if i move away i wont have her support anymore. i wont have her to lean on when i need help with something. i was never taught where to go or how to do stuff for applying to colleges and transferring. i barely know how to do my taxes.

now i really dont know what this article-like rant of a tumblr post is gonna do. i know i dont really have a following and i dont really post on here. but i just thought itd make me feel better to collect my thoughts and put them all together like this. so far the only people concerned about me have been my girlfriend and a couple of my friends ive told about these problems. not even my professors are concerned about me, i havent even gotten a single email or question about how im doing. they say theyre all for mental health but when a student stops coming to class as often suddenly and starts failing or not turning in assignments its none of their business and i must just be getting lazy and im a horrible student yknow? anyways i think thats about it for this. again i dont really know what this will do but i hope someone has advice or support or something. im going insane here.

love to anyone else suffering similar struggles <3

#college #mental health

[pheemuru]

I want to get a little personal for a sec

Below the cut I'm going to talk about my struggle with art, energy, time management, and trying to be an artist in the current social media climate while having a full time job in an unrelated field

In august 2023, i moved out of my parents home for the first time--I moved out of state and got a full time job. this is a good thing and a super positive life event for me! I'm now living with my partner of nearly 7 years and my best friend of 5.

However my relationship with art since before I even moved out... has been really rocky. My job now occupies my time for 6 hours a day 5 days a week. I work from 6:45 am - 10 am (im including travel time here because its still my time thats occupied by work...) and then I have a break until 2 pm. Then I work 2 - 6 pm, and depending on where I'm working at, I get home anywhere from 6-7 pm. I go to bed at 11 pm (This is a very big struggle mentally for me since my jobs schedule is very much opposite of how my body functions. I'm a night owl and not at all an early bird.) This is my monday thru friday.

By the time the weekend comes, I have other household chores to keep up with before I feel like I'm "allowed" to waste my time basically. I also use my time just... recovering for the next week. Every night I get home from work I take a couple edibles to wind down and relax, which is possibly the best part of my day when I finally get to turn my brain off from having to mask and wrangle 30 something kids throughout the day. (daycare aide moment)

How this relates to my art is that I really have zero drive to do any kind of art. I have no ideas. I see stuff online and think "wow I want to do that, I wish I thought of it". Creativity doesn't come naturally to me if it isn't the result of a college assignment or a commission. I struggle a LOT with concepting and sketching. I genuinely don't know how to doodle anymore either

In 2024 I want to focus a lot more on what's going to make me feel satisfied in a career, and so far the only option I have for that is making art my full time gig. However, anyone that is trying that or has tried that knows how difficult that is and how unrealistic it is to just be able to do that with no build up.

Here's where my struggle comes in; I have no fucking energy for anything anymore. I got diagnosed with adhd and autism last year, or just about last year. My job is insanely socially heavy (I'm around 30+ kids and have to manage them) so by the time that I get home, I just want to get stoned and watch movies. I don't want to create. I don't want to do anything. not even shit i like to do.

drawing has become so fucking hard for me. it takes me so goddamn long to finish a piece, I get overwhelmed by current trends, and it doesnt help that the fact of the matter is, social media has moved onto video formats. This means I will have to keep up with video trends to get any kind of eyes on my work. But how do you keep up with video trends when you don't even have any art to show to begin with, nonetheless ones that fit with the theme of the trends going around?

So now I need to make supplementary/filler recordings to fill out content if I want to be serious about my social media presence. On top of the fact I actually have to create art. On top of the fact that there's dishes in my sink every day and laundry that has to be done every week and groceries that have to be shopped for and a job that has to be attended to five days a week. I know 30 hours a week truly is not as much as others work to be full time but my god is it exhausting? All this shit on top of itself makes me feel like I regret moving out a little bit. Overall I don't, because I don't have to live with my parents and I can relax around my partner, but like. oh my god?

literally how does anyone live like this and not want to kill themselves. I had to get a zoloft script because i kept having mental breakdowns every sunday because I have to go back to fucking work and I never feel like I have enough time to do anything meaningful. by the time my brain is like, "ready" to work, its 9 pm and i have to get ready for bed in 2 hours.

I've contemplated getting my masters in teaching to be an art teacher, but I really wouldn't.. want to do that for the rest of my life? you don't really get days off if you need it, youre obligated to work outside of work hours just to get anything done, parents right now kind of suck, school admins also suck, curriculums are cutting art programs, and kids are also becoming so much more disengaged with art at younger ages.

with the state of everything I find it really hard not to just spiral into a depressive episode. I don't know what my future holds. Sure, I have my parents as a safety net now, but theyre approaching their 70s and arent going to be around for the majority of the rest of my life. what happens then? what happens when theyre gone and i have literally no other support beyond the little life i made for myself right now? i already feel like im not allowed to prioritize myself at the moment given my position in the household (full time consistent job that pays somewhat decent ((Decent being $16.75/hour lol)) for the area im in, im the one that can drive, im the one with the largest paycheck and most consistent hours). I can't really get days off at work if I wake up having a panic attack or even physical sickness. I'm supposed to just deal with it and clock in because we dont have enough people to cover last minute like that. And I'm someone with (honestly) debilitating stomach issues. I had to have an upper endoscopy and tests done which only yield so much if you don't follow up with an allergist, which I still have yet to do...

Currently I'm supposed to set up appointments for my dentist, an allergist, a cardiologist, and I need to contact my psych because my pharmacy told me my zoloft cant be refilled (second month on it btw lol).

so like. when the fuck am i supposed to have any kind of every to dedicate to a second part time job, my own fucking art business? the thing i want to be the most passionate about, i have no energy left for. I feel so wildly unsatisfied in my life right now because of this. I'm struggling. I'm struggling a lot and I wish i didn't have to work at all. I wish I could just have my art be my full time thing, but I dont have the audience nor the social media prowess to make that happen so quickly.

I'm tired. I'm fucking tired. everyone keeps saying "take care of yourself" or "self care" but jesus christ how am i supposed to when i cant even just work 4 days a week consistently because for whatever reason I'm the only person at my job that can do what i do? how am i supposed to practice self care when that self care would mean i quit my fucking job lol. i'm at such a loss and i feel like im just letting the time pass by like grains of sand in an hourglass. being torn between wanting to die and wanting to push through is a fucking insane feeling. all we do in life is struggle until we die and I'm finding it harder and harder to get over that kind of mental hurdle. every time i drive i have to fight the genuine intrusive thoughts of yanking the steering wheel to put myself in a ditch with my car just to give myself a couple weeks of a break.

I'm tired. And there's nothing i can do about it. how long can one weather a storm before getting lost at sea

#vent post #anyone else. anyone else at all #burnout #like i dont even know how to job hunt anymore #everything on linkedin is either shitty or not real #same with indeed #how does anyone find a work from home job like seriously #all i want is some stupid wfh job #i want a job behind the scenes. i dont want to talk to people all day #i have zero applicable skills for any modern job

[kiribakus-wifes]

Rainy day - (My OC) fan fiction, fluff, Short Story

Parirings: Eijiro Kirishima x Asami Sato (My OC)

Note: This is a short story that has my oc in it so its not a y/n. I have to start writing my oc's info book but I will after I post this book I am new to writing fan fiction and I wanted to give it a try since I like writing essays and reading fan fictions. This is a fluff romance story of Eijiro Kirishima x Asami Sato that is the name of my oc I hope you guys like it and please correct me and give me tips on my writing I want to improve and make you guys happy so please let me know with all your feedback🤍

All characters are aged up and have graduated UA highschool some of my calculations might be off when I do write my OC info book. Please don’t mind it 🥲 I hope you enjoy.

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It's been four years since my boyfriend Eijiro Kirishima asked me to move in with him after we graduated UA. I still couldn't believe that I get to spend the rest of my life with him as I'm in my own thoughts laying on the couch waiting for Eiji to come home.

Eijiro has been training so hard to become one of the top heroes so he's always so busy but so am I since I'm a hero too. It is currently nine o’ clock pm. I took a few days off from hero duties because Eijiro believed I needed rest when he noticed I wasn't sleeping much at night and almost falling asleep during conversations but all I wanted to do was get back out onto the field and stop villains, but he gave me a stern look when I said I was fine and laughed about taking a few days off so I knew he was being serious.

I haven't really been away from him for more than a day or two so I knew I wasn't going to survive not seeing him for so long. He had a busy schedule so he would try not to call when he wanted to let me know he was safe at four in the morning when he got to the hotel from a mission he just finished, but I would already be up because I couldn't sleep without him there… so much for taking some days off.

We would text and call here and there but today he hasn’t texted much but he did say he was on a very hard mission and not to worry too much about him which was hard as it is.

I missed Eijiro so much, I missed fighting alongside him and making jokes about having kids one day but the biggest thing I missed most about him are his warm tight hugs. I've been laying on this couch for what felt like hours.

I put on twilight hoping it would distract me from not crying and feeling lonely but of course that failed. I was on the verge of tears until I heard a ding go off from my phone I quickly picked up my phone to see a text from “My Sharkboy” the text said,

My sharkboy– Hey pebble, i'm sorry i haven't texted you in a while i know you must have been worried about me but dont worry anymore i'm safe and im coming home very soon if your asleep which i hope you are i love you sleep well <3

Me- ahhh eiji i missed you so so much, you're coming home yayyy! when will you be here i miss your cuddles

My Sharkboy- Asami your supposed to be resting, but i missed you more my love i'll be home in fifteen minutes so better be ready for so much hugs and kisses im driving right now and it's starting to pour so i'll see you soon pebble i love you

Me- Okayy eiji please drive carefully in the rain i can't wait to see you i love you more <3

I jumped off the couch smiling so much I was so excited to see him I knew he would be sore and tired so since it was raining I decided I'd draw him a warm bath.

I used some coconut scented soap to make scented bubbles in the warm water and I put some rose petals from some flowers that were almost dying near the door leading up to our bathtub into our room. Then I lit a few candles by the bathtub.

I wanted to try to do something special since he's always working so hard and never really gets a break and always making sure I relax before himself. He deserves this as I was lighting the last candle on the edge of the tub when I heard a knock from the front door. It startled me and I almost fell into the tub but thank goodness I catched myself before a disaster happened.

I ran to the door checking the peep hole and lou and behold I could faintly see a tall red haired figure standing there. I did almost doubt myself since he said he would be here in fifteen minutes and that didn't really seem like fifteen minutes. I cautiously opened the door and there he was my face lit up as I looked into his ruby red eyes and saw how happy he looked to see me.

Looking back at me he looked like such a cute wet dog, I let him walk in only a little bit and I had gotten a better look at him in the bright light. His used to be tall gel liked red hair was all down in his face his sharp toothy smile showing he was soaked from head to toe but I didn't care I missed him a lot so I jumped up on him hugging him tight like I was a koala.

He chuckled at my actions “well someone really did miss me a lot” he said smiling with one hand on my back and the other scratching his neck nervously. I looked at him, grinning from ear to ear “Of course I did Eiji, I have a surprise for you”. He looked at me and then looked down, seeing all the petals and some dead ones on the floor. “Oh yea?” He smiled, putting me down.

Once I touched the floor I pushed him a little to follow the trail I made. We made our way to the bathtub, it was dark but the lit up candles made it a nice dim light.

We were in the doorway to our bathroom. I was so nervous it was so quiet and I couldn't see Eijiro's face since he was in front of me and he hadn't said a word. Did he like it? Did he hate it? Was it too cheesy for him? He turned around and bent down, giving me a tight hug.

He had his head in my neck so I could feel his cheeks were a bit wet so I moved his face to get a better look at him. He had some tears streaming down his face, "Eiji why are you crying.." I asked with a worried tone he looked at me and gave my forehead a wet kiss "because my pebble is so sweet to me" we both smiled and embraced each other for a little longer before I realized kirishima was still wet I told him to undress and get in the tub he did as told and got in.

We havent seen eachother in a while so when he was fully exposed getting in the tub it made my heart skip a beat I was always nervous about stuff like that even if we've been together for so long but Eijiro on the other hand didn't seem to mind he would always laugh every time I tried to turn around to not look at him my face would be as he called it “red as a tomato”.

He got in he looked so relaxed and at ease I always loved his hair down it's so cute, I picked up his soggy hero suit and put it in the wash when I came back to the bathroom Eijiro looked like he'd had fallen asleep in the tub I giggled a little and one of his eyes opened looking at me then his red eyes looked me up and down. “Aren't you gonna come join me pebble?” I leaned on the side of the wall looking at him and crossed my arms. “This is for you Eiji not me, I'll still keep you company if you would like?” He looked at me and then turned his head back to his resting position.

He closed his eyes and patted the side of the tub motioning for me to sit next to him. I made my way over to him rubbing the top of his head, "can you have your back toward me eiji i want to wash you up" he looked at me in awe and smiled "okay love" he turned and I grabbed the wash cloth wetting it and adding soap to it making it soapy I scrubbed him knowing he might fall asleep in my lap with how much he relaxed into my touch.

I loved every second of it. It was such a passionate sensual moment I think we both needed this. Once I was done washing him all up and I let him rest a little while longer I knew the bath was starting to get cold so I grabbed a dark red towel that I had warmed up in the dryer beforehand. “Eiji.. wake up eiji” his eyes slowly opened. He shivered a little and looked at me with so much love behind his eyes. “Time to get out eiji the water is getting cold”

He stood up without warning me, I was close to him and just looked up at him. I didn't have enough time to react so I stood up very quickly as well nervously looking at him. He laughed, I handed him the towel looking away. "You're so cute when you act like this is your first time seeing me pebble" he wrapped the towel around his waist stepping out of the tub. I nervously laughed leaning down to drain the tub when I felt a presence behind me. "Eiji what are you doin-" My sentence was cut off when two big pairs of hands turned my body around and lifted me up, my legs were wrapped around his waist, the towel hanging on by a thread and my eyes met with his ruby red ones. My face was probably so red as he carried me to our shared bedroom.

He gently put me down on our bed and walked over to our closet, I crossed my legs watching him. He dropped the towel and I turned around with my face in my hands. I heard shuffling behind me and then footsteps coming toward me, “you can turn around now pebble”. I turned to meet kirishima face to face. He grabbed my face softly and kissed me on the lips. I smiled through the kiss because of the cute gesture. We were like that for what felt like a long time but I didn't mind after we were done sharing the little cute moment he asked me “do you want to watch a movie pebble before bed?” I looked at him grinning he knows I love watching movies with him so he said okay and chuckled I ran to the living room and kitchen to turn off the tv and lights I had left on distracted by Eijiro coming home, then I ran back to the room I walked in on Eijiro fixing the bed the tv was on and the lights were off but the red L.E.D lights shining through the back of the tv made a dimly lit up room.

I smiled so happily to be able to have him safe and home. He got in the bed and saw me standing there. I saw his toothy smile and then saw his hand. He patted the bed and moved the fluffy blankets and huge stuffed bear he got me when he had to leave one time it smelled just like him and was in a shark onesie pajama. I loved that bear so much. It was the best gift he's ever gotten me. I got in bed and scooted next to his side. He was so warm and smelled like vanilla and coconuts. He wrapped his arm around me bringing me closer if that was even possible.

He picked a sad romance movie. This was my favorite movie. I had it on replay all the time. It was called the fault in our stars. He knew I loved it but he also knew when it's really late at night that I would always fall asleep so fast when i'm in his arms and this movie was playing. I lifted my body up to give him a goodnight kiss and we exchanged “sweet dreams eiji”, “sweet dreams my pretty girl, thank you for the bath it helped and meant so much to me” he said, kissing my cheek I smiled and cuddled into him some more.

“I love you Eijiro”.

“I love you more Asami”.

and as he already knew I had drifted off to sleep not even ten minutes into the movie.

The End~

#bhna #eijiro kirishima mha #missing someone #newbie #new writers on tumblr #new story #first post #im tryin my best #writing #short story #fanfic #rainy evening #romance #oc stuff #my ocs #fluff #mha kirishima #kiri #bnha kirishima

[beautifulnightmareunknown]

oh deer (lol this is cringy)

hiii. so my morning was actually really nice. i woke up, went to the gym with my sis, got back home, ate and made my meals for the day then went to go get ready for work. while i was showering grace (my sis) got my clothes and all my “getting ready” things together for me and she even made and brought me my coffee. omfg and she made my bed for me lol. ive loved having her home from college. she really is my best friend. i feel like i can literally talk to her about anything and everything and there is no judgment or negative thoughts/feelings. i go to her for just about anything and she is always there. ANYWAYS, i left home and was bee bopping on my way to work listening to some music and just doing my thang. well i was almost to work and i freaking deer jumps out in front of me. i was only going about 35mph so the damage isnt that bad, but my hood is a little bent up and my grill is a little busted. other than that though my car is fine. i did however get in touch with my insurance guy and hes referring me to this place to get it fixed without filing a claim if i dont have to. hopefully its not too much money, but either way i just want my car fixed. i wouldnt mind driving around a cute little rental car either. 

im currently at work right now, its nap time. i really cannot wait to start my new job. this place is just forever getting on my nerves. i love tammy to death (my co-teacher) but damn she is lazy. like when the kids need something shes always like trying to sneak tell them to ask me so that i will do it. and dont even get me started on the admin here. theyre just as bad if not worse. i was supposed to get finger printed like 2 or 3 weeks ago but i was sick on the day i was scheduled so i missed it and they just keep getting on my ass about rescheduling it like its my job to do so. which its not by the way. but little do they know its my last week here so it doesnt even matter. they just all get on my nerves here. its like no one wants to do their job and i mean thats why half the workers are leaving and why the whole class comes to me instead of the lead lol. i am going to miss the kids somewhat but not enough for me to stay and the pay here sucks. but yeah im going to work this week out and then text melanie (the director) that i quit. i dont care how unprofessional that is only because when they hired me here they made me not put in a 2 weeks notice to my previous job like i didnt have a choice and you know what they say.. “do unto others like you would want done to you” or something like that. then ill just have a week to chill and get into my new routine because quite literally fuck this place and lowkey fuck my schedule right now too. 

ive been really good this year about keeping a positive mindset and not letting certain things get to me. i plan to keep it that way for the whole year and only work on bettering myself. i have weeded out most toxic aspects of my life and have gained more positive and encouraging in replace. i believe this year is only going to get better and more successful. one of my personal goals for this year is to read as many books as my height. thats crazy sounding i know but i am already off to a decent start with one book lol. 

nap time is almost over so i am going to go ahead and sign off now. byeeee

[he4rtsforjoao]

Thank you sm for doing my Cheating w/character death one❤️❤️❤️. Ok umm so i’ve recently read a book involving the right person not enough time and I was wondering if u could do it w/João amksksksnksmsk. Thanks love❤️ I need help💀✋🏻

Choices- J.F

Pairings: João Felíx x F!Reader

Warnings: angst

Summary: written on request!!

Author note: hopefully I wrote your request right!😭

From the very beginning, both you and João were fully aware of the ramifications that came with being in a relationship. João's frequent travels to play matches out of town and your demanding job as an actor made it nearly impossible for you to be there for him during his games. As much as you longed to support him wholeheartedly, the reality was that you had to prioritize your filming commitments, even if it meant sacrificing being by João's side.

There were moments when João, under the influence of alcohol, would plead with you to give up your acting career entirely. Yet, deep down, you knew that you couldn't yield to his requests. You had invested countless years of hard work and dedication to reach the position you were in, and surrendering it all over a single demand was simply inconceivable.

You were currently on the set of a new popular series where you played the lead role. You were aware that João had an important game scheduled today, but due to the numerous retakes you had to endure, you could hardly find a moment to sneak away and catch a glimpse of the game or even send him a text to inquire about his progress. When you finally wrapped up on set around 1 am the first thing you did was check your phone, you were surprised to find zero messages from João, especially since you had sent one earlier at 3 pm before the game had even begun.

You reached out to your contact and persistently dialed his number until he answered on the final ring. "Hello?" His voice carried the weight of drowsiness, causing guilt to well up within you. "Hey, how did the game go today? I wasn't able to catch much of it." He hummed, pausing briefly before responding, "Yeah, it was alright. We managed to secure a victory, 1-0." A smile showed up on your face.

"That's good news, isn't it? Why do you sound so down?" You inquire, noticing the lackluster tone in his voice. "I'm not sure, y/n. I've been contemplating some things," he responds, causing anxiety to surge within you as you enter your car and lock the doors.

"About what?" You probe, flipping on the engine but remaining stationary, not daring to drive until you uncover the specifics of his concerns. He pauses once more, exhaling a heavy sigh into the phone, "I'm uncertain. Something in our relationship has been weighing me. I just don't see us progressing any further. You're stuck in your acting career, that even when I'm home, we barely see each other before you leave to go film. As for me, constantly jetting around the globe, you can't even join me for a game." You braced yourself, knowing this conversation was unlikely to conclude on a positive note.

“I know João, but you also have to know I do try my best to support you, even if my career seem to always stand in the way. And I know you have always told me countless of times to just quit cause I have you to help me, but what you don’t seem to comprehend is the part where im not at that point where I want to let my career go already“ your palms began to sweat, as you become increasingly anxious

“see y/n this is what I’m talking about. You don’t seem to try to put effort into this and it kills me. That’s why I just think it’s better we end this relationship for the best us of. Right now it isn’t a perfecting timing and we need to let that sink in..” he pauses for a moment “I have to go bye” before you could even share your thoughts on all of this, he abruptly ends the call, leaving you stunned by the rapidity of it all.

#fluff #angst #smut #joão felix blurb #joao felix angst #football imagines #world cup imagines #joao felix #football x reader #soccer player x reader #joao felix x reader #joao felix smut #soccer fluff #soccer player imagine

[littlefoxwithbighat]

also, since you request asks but i delivered bad news instead, i hope youre having a lovely day! im having a bit of a rough time but my cats are warm and soft in this summer sun through the windows and ive got a hopeful outlook for therapy this week :) do you have any plans this week? i hope theyre fun, if so, or maybe you prefer to have an open schedule and relax? maybe you have pets too?

take this as an open invitation to infodump about ANYTHING you want (if you want to!) i am a bit nervous to make myself known, but i promise ill be back to check and see and read and care :) bye bye for now!

Aww anon I'm sorry your having a rough time!

Glad you've got your kitties to help you through, cat hugs are always helpful when youre down. What are your cats names? You know I want to see them if you have photos, no pressure of course!

I got back home from uni a couple days ago and the first thing I did was hug my cat (Technically she's our neighbours cat but we catsit her a lot and she spends half her time at our house! I don't have any other pets right now, although I wish I did.).

I really hope therapy goes well <33. Currently im really busy with end of term deadlines for uni, but as soon as those are done I'm going to be free and I personally cannot wait! My plan is to go on loads of bike rides and do loads of art-I have a canvas I've sketched i want to actually paint and I want to finish an animatic for the magnus archives I've started making. I also have to sort out a summer job and driving lessons because I still dont have my licence lol.

Feel free to stop by again anytime! <33

#Also anon if you want to pick out a nickname or an emoji for me to recognise you by that would be lovely! #Asks #Answered

[catintheruemorgue]

annoying things they do

summary: small things these guys do that just grinds your gears a bit.

characters: oda, dazai, kunikida, twain, akutagawa, atsushi, mori, poe, ranpo, fittzgerald, steinbeck, chuuya, yosano, gin, kouyou, higuchi, alcott and lucy

these are all based off things i do or have inconvenienced my life lmfao i’ll probs do a part two with everyone i missed this just got wayyy to long lol next im posting being friends with double black 

Oda:

If you're wearing shorts and have bruises he will poke them when you're resting your legs on him. He’s silent about it too and if you yell at him he pretends to act like he doesn't know what you're talking about.

Will smack your sunburn but this one is actually an accident. He just wanted to pat you on the back because you're amazing.

Will space out when you talk too long, sometimes certain objects are just so… mesmerizing

Dazai:

Loves to jumpscare you the only exception is if it was a trigger. In that case he will just call your name and whip something at you for you to catch at random.

When you're driving he likes to reach over and honk your horn. It's almost caused so many roadside fistfights.

If he sees a dog in public he will bark and growl at it.

Kunikida:

Won’t let you on the bed without socks on. You could be sick as a dog and he’ll still enforce this rule.

Cleaning is hard because he has a hard time throwing things away. You'll spend extra time as he holds two identical pens, trying to decide which one he wants to keep. He’s learned to plan certain days in his schedule for cleaning now.

Won't let you turn up the music in the car and will keep it at a level that's so low it's annoying.

Twain:

Walks around the house shirtless but then complains about how cold it is.

Blasts his music so loud when he wakes up in the morning and it's always early 2000’s hits. It's not rare for you to have Pocketful of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield stuck in your head by 9 am.

Always has to climb something, this stems from his adventurous side. It's not really that annoying but when you’re in a crowded area and he runs off to go climb the tall statue, screaming at you to take a photo… Yes it is. Especially when children try and follow him and you're stuck receiving glares from the parents.

Akutagawa:

Will not let you throw any food products out. He tells you it's a perfectly good meal (even if it's not) and that he will eat it tomorrow. It’s sad because you know this stems from childhood but it’s still annoying.

Reuses the same gross, musty ziplock baggies. You keep buying new ones but he doesn't get it lol.  

Will tell you if your breath smells, hair is messy, outfit is ugly. He does not see an issue with this and it's nice knowing someone has your back but he doesn't have to be so rude about it..

Atsushi:

If he drinks he's one of those drinkers who will not let you take it from him. Keeps an iron grip on the cup. He finishes it no matter how drunk and always throws up. Thankfully he rarely drinks.

He stops to help everyone, literally even if they just look like they need help. You've been late to so many things.

Will eat anything. Once you made steak and somehow forgot about it. It was hard as a brick yet he still almost broke his teeth eating it. You think you saw some tears as he told you it was delicious.

Mori:

Listens to people's conversations in public and isn't afraid to comment, loudly, about it. You know it's loud because they either stop talking or try and confront you guys.

Comes up to stops fast and brakes so hard you feel like he does it on purpose.

Sometimes if he and Elise get into a “disagreement” he’ll try and rope you in to take his side and you always do, knowing it would probably give him more satisfaction if you chose to side with her.

Poe:

Asks for constructive criticism but will then argue with you about why you're wrong.

Always humming a song he heard Twain singing and then it gets stuck in your head too.

Will deny stupid things like why your favorite mug is in the trash or why he just let out rather loud scream in the bathroom. You know he's lying because he looks away and makes sure his bangs are covering his eyes.

Ranpo:

Will call you out on any lie even if you don't mean to lie you just forgot about some of the details.

Don't take him grocery shopping if you have a set amount you want to spend. He won't even sneak, he will just say he wants something and throw it in the cart.

Such a backseat driver even though he can't drive.

Fitzgerald:

Likes to act like he's still in his twenties and will somehow get the two of you invited to college parties where he will attempt to do a kegger in front of everyone. You end up being the one to hold him up and he always ends with a, “LETS FUCKING GO!”

Likes to ask for the senior discount even though he's not that old, he just likes to hear the women validate that he's not old.

It’s scary how he used to buy without looking and now will scream if the price on a price tag is too high.

Steinbeck:

Always looking at the grass for wheat to chew on. It's so cheesy when you walk into the city and he's got it sticking out of his mouth.

He gets weirdly intimate with nature and you feel like you're third wheeling.

Has the mentality that he has to provide for you because he is the man. He gets so shocked when he finds out you still want to work.

Chuuya:

Has a hard time making decisions you could ask him what he wants for dinner and his mind will just break.

Gets way too pissed at movies and will actually get up and walk away. Once you were kicked out of the theater because he wouldn't stop yelling at the screen. Another time he walked out you waited a whole ten minutes before you realized he wasn't coming back.

Sometimes activates his ability at night and it's so scary waking up to him floating halfway across the room.

WOMAN TIME!!!!!!!!!!

Yosano:

Will glare at you so intensely if you say something she disagrees with.

Always tries to rope you into drinking with her even if you’ve said no the past ten nights.

Will describe wounds or injuries in such detail and just won’t stop, almost like she’s trying to fuck with you, but she’s not.

Gin:

Claims to be nothing like her big brother but then will go on to make the same facial expressions and do some of the same mannerisms as him.

Will spend hours trying things on just to put it all back, leave the store and change her mind when you’re almost home. Then she’ll have you run back with her to buy it all.

Is used to sneaking around so scares you a lot. Also on the topic of being silent sometimes she just won’t respond, thinking you can just read her vibes / mind.

Kouyou:

Will judge what you eat, especially fast food but will try and steal a fry in private when you're not looking.

Will say things like, “Well that's just the way the world works.” If someone tries to share their baggage with her. You understand she’s had a pretty rough life but it's caused you to almost spit out your drink multiple times.

At functions forgets about you for about an hour while she mingles with everyone else, you could tap on her shoulder and she'll dismiss you like you're a subordinate. Until you clear your throat again you'll see the slight blush as she apologizes.

Higuchi:

She has no sense of privacy. If she hears a crash or loud noise she will bust down the door. It’s sweet but not when the noises are usually from you knocking all the shampoo bottles down again.

Horrible road rage actually puts you on edge to be in the car with her. She doesn't even have to be driving.

Likes to act like she's a professional at everything and people usually believe it because of her suit. It's so nerve wracking when she giggles when they walk away with false information.

Alcott:

Will agree to everything you suggest but you can only tell when she doesn’t want to do it when you’re currently doing it.

Yet she’s not afraid to grumble about how annoying it is when someone bumps into you and doesn’t apologize. It’s sweet but you’re left dealing with the situation if the person is aggressive enough to say something.

Always corrects your spelling or if you say something like “I could care less.”

Lucy:

Will fish for compliments in a very obvious way like, “Wow. Wish someone would call me pretty..” and then just stare right at you.

Kicks you so violently in her sleep but won't let go of you so you cant get away.

Constantly stealing from restaurants. You're banned from a couple restaurants because she got caught trying to steal a cup or salt shaker.

#oda x reader #dazai x reader #kunikida x reader #mark twain x reader #akutagawa x reader #atsushi x reader #mori x reader #bsd poe x reader #ranpo x reader #fitzgerald x reader #steinbeck x reader #chuuya x reader #yosano x reader #gin x reader #kouyou x reader #higuchi x reader #alcott x reader #lucy montgomery x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x reader #omg i posted this on my main ugh

[sarah-yyy]

Howdy, I don’t see like Im bugging you or anything but I was wondering would you ever continue that moshang secretary kin au?

[from here]

Mobei Jun wakes up to the blaring screech of his alarm clock.

"Shang Qinghua," he growls.

Mobei Jun hates that goddamn alarm. Shang Qinghua knows that, and always makes sure that he's here to turn it off before it goes off.

Mobei Jun hasn't needed to turn his alarm on in years, but he's a creature of habit, and it's long since formed part of his nighttime ritual. Mobei Jun has never thought of training himself out of the habit; it's never been a bother to him since Shang Qinghua picked up that Mobei Jun is always in a better mood if Shang Qinghua turns off his alarm before it goes off, and wakes him up personally instead.

Shang Qinghua sweetly cajoling him into opening his eyes is a much better experience than the racket that his alarm makes.

That his alarm is currently still making.

"Shang Qinghua!" Mobei Jun calls out. The noise has already drained the sleep out of him. If this is a tactic by Shang Qinghua to try to get him out of bed more effectively, Mobei Jun is going to dock his pay. Severely. He sits up, rubbing his eyes. "Shang Qinghua, where the hell-"

The rest of his sentence die at the tip of his tongue when he catches sight of his suit for the day laid out on his usually empty clothes rack.

Shang Qinghua had done that last night when he'd sent Mobei Jun home. Because Mobei Jun had told him to take some time off. Because Shang Qinghua wants to quit his job, and leave Mobei Jun.

Shang Qinghua isn't here today to turn his alarm off. Shang Qinghua won't be here to bicker with Mobei Jun over which tie compliments the shade of blue his suit is. Shang Qinghua won't be sitting by his side, mindlessly chattering about Mobei Jun's schedule while Mobei Jun eats the breakfast that Shang Qinghua has prepared for him.

Shang Qinghua won't be right by Mobei Jun's side when Mobei Jun turns to look for him.

The thought is...unpleasant. Everything about this morning so far is unpleasant already, and it's only half past six. Mobei Jun doesn't know how he's going to make it through the next fifteen hours without killing someone.

Next to him, the alarm continues blaring. Mobei Jun lets out a frustrated growl, picks it up, and sends it flying towards the wall.

He regrets it almost immediately; the sudden quietness in his room is even worse than the blaring alarm.

He'd gotten used to Shang Qinghua's non-stop chatter, and now Shang Qinghua wants to leave. How irresponsible! Mobei Jun's even offered to marry him, and still, all he wants to do is to tender his resignation so he can leave. How unreasonable!

He picks his phone up, and calls Shang Qinghua.

Shang Qinghua doesn't pick up.

Mobei Jun's ire skyrockets.

He angrily makes his way to the bathroom, angrily takes a shower, angrily puts on the outfit that he had no say in picking last night, angrily makes himself a (subpar) cup of coffee, angrily drives himself (He has to drive himself! Him! Mobei Jun!) to Shang Qinghua's apartment, and angrily raps on Shang Qinghua's door.

Shang Qinghua is yawning when he opens the door. He freezes mid-stretch when he sees Mobei Jun. "Laoban?"

Mobei Jun takes in Shang Qinghua's rumpled airplane print pyjamas, and the way his hair is a complete mess. Is this what Shang Qinghua is like when he's not working for Mobei Jun? Mobei Jun will not let him waste away at home like this, not when he's capable of doing so much more.

"Get dressed," he snaps. "We're going out."

"Out where?" Shang Qinghua asks. He frowns. "Wait, you asked me to take a few days off."

"You refused," Mobei Jun points out. "Bureau of Civil Affairs."

Shang Qinghua hadn't exactly refused his proposal last night - that's good enough for Mobei Jun.

Shang Qinghua blinks. "What? Why?"

"Why do you think?" Mobei Jun asks. "We're getting married."

(buy me a kofi! // more de facto verse)

#the scum villain's self saving system #scumbag system #svsss #moshang #ficlets #very mild sads???? like just a zest of it! most of it is just dumbness #very quietly: #de facto verse #i can't believe i haven't written anything in over a month ;_; last month was Terrible yo #july should be better i've got a couple of wips that i've been meaning to finish ahhhh

[limelocked]

I'm kinda interested of Sapnap's perspective during the MCC in the hermit au. I'm assuming it's been a few months since Dream escaped so I wonder if Sapnap feels happy, sad, or even a little jealous when seeing Dream with the hermits.

this has been sitting in my inbox for literal months but someone just reblogged the post it was based of so im gonna be updating based on current hermit dream thoughts first then go into sapnap (warning that it might be less than stellar since im not familiar with his character too much)

the team is dream, ren, gem, and cub. dream only vaguely knows gem but she reminds him of a number of people from his own server, not in a bad way, while ren and cub he knew more or less from previous mccs and who hed had to lightly fight scott to be a team with.

he is confident

he avoided sapnap during tag, there had been no battle box or survival games yet, it was break, and dream was running because while talking to his team he'd seen sapnap walking towards them and while he rationally knew that he couldnt be hurt in the hub there was something, weither it was fear of being drug back to pandoras or it was the fear of having to talk at all with the friend that promised him death... who knew

-

dream hadnt been in the last few mccs which was, by all metrics, weird. he'd been in a few of them during his imprisonment but it was never a fun affair and they never looked in the eye. this, amongst other things, was why sapnap was surprised to see the teams of the months event and to see dream playing with all new people.

he cant get ahold of him on the training server or via messages, he asks george, even phil and wilbur, but no one has seen much of him even though the leaderboards show he has been practicing. he even schedules a visit at the prison where techno tells him that he's not seen dream for months , and could he please get sam to let him out before quackity starts getting torturin ideas again

this is why sapnap doesnt really know how he feels when dream masterfully avoids him like this is some sick game of manhunt in the middle of a tournament. it feels obvious but he also feels betrayed, irritation and resignation bubbling up into a simmering anger because why doesnt he just fucking face me!

its with these conflicting feelings that he now runs after dream, ignoring the shouts of the team dream left behind, and following in the ever chaise that was once their friendship. and when he drives dream into a corner, and see how scared he is, that anger and frustration and betrayal.... its still there... but he cant act on it

because his best friend looks like a wounded deer in front of a hungry wolf

so he just says "hi", a restrained but genuine hi, and doesnt follow when dream sprints away

he tells george first, then he goes back to his team, confused, resigned, melancholic

while dream runs home, and ren hands him an armful of pinecones

#hermit dream #hc x dsmp #dreblr