#idk I got a vision and couldn’t do anything except make it real

[jinkiesmariz]

Nvm I have a small meal for gene likers hello I need him to chase me with a knife I think

#mystreet gene #gene #mcd gene #Aphmau gene #Aphblr #doodle #mys gene #gene mystreet #I think it’d be so fine if him to act like a piece of shit before stabbing me #idk I got a vision and couldn’t do anything except make it real #I have an exam later today what the hell #anyways look at my pretty princess #ghost face au #he would make a wonderful killer #I’ll be his final girl any day #jinks art

[waiting-for-what-again]

My Own Worst Enemy

My Own Worst Enemy

Atsumu x reader; College au

TW: Mentions of alcohol, angst, breakup

A/N: Idk why but whenever I hear the song “My Own Worst Enemy” by Lit I think of this man so I thought it best to try and write it out. Hope you enjoy!

11:39am

It was supposed to be a fun night out. He wanted to show you a good time, what a real party should be like. He can’t count the number he’s gotten around to, nor the number he’s thrown, nor the number of hangovers he’s had, but one thing’s for certain, he never fucked up this badly in his life. A pounding in his head blurred his vision in the early rays of sun peaking through the blinds. The bed was… above him? No, he was on the floor. With his clothes on. That’s one positive – right? Maybe. A groan escaped him as he slowly rose to a sit, his mind swimming in a desperate attempt to piece together the previous night. A stream of cool air ruffled his hair and hit his face. I did not come through the window last night.  The window squeaked as it was slammed shut.

Slowly, he managed to trudge to the bathroom. It might just be the pounding in his head and the intense temptation to vomit, but something was off. Splashing cool water on his face in an attempt for clarity, it hit him. Your facewash you always left here wasn’t on the counter. Your teal toothbrush was missing. You can’t be gone after one bad night, can you?

Shit, shit, shit

Atsumu whispered to himself. His hands patted himself down for his phone. He needed to call someone, anyone who was at that party. He went back to the bathroom – he might actually throw up now.

Suna was probably there. There’s no way he wasn’t and if one person recorded anything last night, it was Suna. First he needed his phone. Probably left it in the car. At least he didn’t have to walk very far to search his vehicle since it happened to be right outside his door. On the lawn. In front of his apartment complex. A groan left him as his hand dragged down his face. To his much needed luck, the phone was indeed in the car and still had a little juice left in the battery.

83 notifications.

That can’t be good…

“I can’t believe you said that to her!!”

“Atsumu you fucking pig.”

“What did you do man…”

He couldn’t bring himself to read the rest, except when he saw a video from Suna accompanied by the words “Bro you really fucked up this time”. He didn’t know if he was prepared to watch it. He couldn’t bear to think of what he could have possibly said to you. You were everything to him. You brought him so much peace, so many laughs, so much comfort. He never met anyone he was so sure he wanted by his side as he ventured through the rest of college, the rest of his career, the rest of his life. But now he wasn’t so sure. You were gone. Quite possibly for good.

The video quality was poor along with its audio. He could make out some yelling from both of you. Then he remembered. Not everything, but pieces. You were hanging around that Meian guy. A little too close for being “just friends”. He tried to kiss you. Yes that’s what it was. You got upset and came to him, but he, he was drunk off his ass to say the least and he…

He blamed you.

And called you shallow.

And nothing but good looks.

And wanting to ride his coattails of inevitable success.

On the video he made out you throwing something at him. Maybe a bottle? Who knows.

Why, how? He didn’t mean any of that. Hell, he never even thought any of that. So where did it come from? He knew those words cut deep, things you yourself admitted to being insecure of others thinking when they saw the two of you as a couple. Oh but you were so much more. You were so smart and good at what you  wanted to do. You were one of the top students in your manger and were destined for success especially after that internship you won over the summer. Not only were you that, but you were funny, you could keep up with his sense of humor and managed to keep him on his toes. You kept him in line and he kept you adventurous. You stayed friends your freshman year of school, but half way through the next, you both slowly came to terms with your feelings and got together. Now in the winter of you senior year, he was on the verge of losing you – if he hadn’t already.

He didn’t know what to do. He sunk to the floor and next thing he knew hot tears rolled down his cheeks and he began to sob.

---------------------------------------------------------------

2:09am

You left the party alone despite your friend’s insisting to follow you. You needed space. The walk to your apartment would hopefully assist in clearing your mind as well. About half-way back, the goosebumps began to appear. You didn’t bring a jacket because you didn’t think you needed one. If anything you would just borrow… his. You were about to pass his apartment actually. You always left a change of clothes there and usually a jacket. You had a key on you so might as well take advantage.

The familiar scent of the apartment hit you as soon as the door opened. He wouldn’t be back for at least another hour or two if he even managed to leave that is. You went to his closet and picked up the small neatly folded stack of clothes. That was all you really needed. But you knew you wouldn’t be coming back any time soon. Might as well grab the other couple things you left there too. That would be sure to send a message to Miya. You wondered if he would even remember what he said. He was the lightest weight you had ever met, which definitely did not suit him.

After collecting your toothbrush, facewash, clothes, and the few other necessities you kept there, you took a seat on the edge of his bed. All of your memories there waltz through your mind. The late night talks, long days studying, exciting nights filled with, well you know what. The past few years spent with Atsumu would certainly not be described as easy, but they were worth it. You dealt with his flaws as you dealt with his as all couples do. This time he just took it a bit too far.

He hit the major insecurities you couldn’t bring yourself to get rid of all together. You came to him for protection, but instead, you ended up wanting protection from him. From his words. He always had your back and was always there. You trusted him and he trusted you. So where did this come from? Was he thinking those things this whole time? Were you really so pathetic to… No, you needed to stop and leave. You couldn’t do this right now. Going home to your own bed never sounded so good.

You almost called him the next morning. Then the next day. Then the day after. You wanted to know why he said what he said if anything. You never saw him act so out of character. You had to know. You wanted to go back to the happy relationship you had not even four days ago. You weren’t sure where things would go from here now though. It might be a sign that things aren’t always as they seem.

---------------------------------------------------------------

#atsumu x reader #college au #atsumu miya #atsumu angst #First writing post so hopefully it went okay

[btsmosphere]

Hellooo im new to your blog but i think i had seen you a couple of times? Maybe?? Maybe not?? I cant remember But congratulations for your 400 followers! I saw this milestone drabble game and idk if you already close the request but im just going to try shooting my shot. you can ignore this ask if you dont want to do it. Im not forcing you!💜💜

Prompt 27, and 31 (fluff)

Where jimin and f!reader were the only ones trapped inside a library and the lights went off. Reader scared of the dark so she clings on jm and he tried his best to comfort her and goof around making some (bad) jokes to lighten her up. Plus jm had a big fat crush on her.

~summary: being trapped in the library is your nightmare, but could it turn into a dream? Jimin x reader Prompts: …that… is such a bad pun. I love it & I will be unavailable on these dates because I will be screaming feral in the woods ~word count: 1156 ~college au, friends to lovers, fluff Rating: g Warnings: crying, reader is scared of the dark, and it’s dark, locked in, Jimin suffers (not really, he’s just flustered) ~a/n: haha,, drabble?? who is she? this one obvs got a bit.. long😅but I really liked your request my lovely, so I wanted to do it justice. I really hope you enjoy it!

Air was jamming in your throat, the only sound except your soft footsteps echoing alone in the darkness.

But the silence was making things worse. Your tense shoulders shook, ready to flinch back from every shadow – of which, unfortunately, there were a great many, given you were tiptoeing between rows upon rows of towering bookshelves.

Cursing the fact the route to the library’s exit took you further from the windows, where meagre streetlamps at least illuminated the space a little, you pressed on.

Don’t panic. Nothing can hurt you. You’re alone, there’s nothing there…

One more corner lay ahead of you, but you refused to slow down, attempting instead to keep your stride confident as you came towards it-

And straight into someone. Not a shadow, not a bookshelf, a real, actual someone that you nearly crashed right into. With a jolt, you were stumbling back, sending a scream piercing through the stillness.

“Woah, hey- y/n?”

As you cut off your shriek, the person’s voice reached you. You were sure you recognised it, but the tears that had been startled to your eyes blurred your vision. Blinking furiously, you lowered your shaking hands from where they had shot to your mouth.

“J-Jimin?”

“I didn’t mean to scare you,” his worried eyes swam into focus, “did you get stuck here too?”

With only a nod, you were diving towards him, clutching at his shirt as you took deep breaths against his shoulder. Jimin may not be your closest friend, but you knew him well enough, and right now you needed someone, anyone, to ease your fears.

Under your touch though, Jimin gasped. Though he didn’t hesitate to move his hands to your back in comfort, his eyes were wide with shock.

He was sure his heart was going to rocket straight from his chest. Of course, when he fantasised about you throwing yourself into his arms, you weren’t normally shaking with fear, but he supposed he couldn’t have it all.

“It’s alright, I’m here,” he hushed, sliding you both to the floor, “there’s nothing to be scared of.”

Breathing deeper now, he was satisfied hearing you settle down some more.

“Well, unless the head librarian sees me in here,” he rambled on, fingers stroking through your hair, “I lost a library book once and I’m sure she still wants to murder me.”

You couldn’t help the small chuckle he elicited from you. On looking up, you found him looking down at you with a growing grin.

“She is scary,” you nodded, wiping at one eye.

Jimin definitely preferred it when you smiled. Even a small one like this put his heart more at ease. Encouraged, he pressed on.

“But if she is here, at least she’ll scare off any monsters,” he nudged you, rewarded with your smile becoming brighter still.

“Should we… should we try and get help?” you muttered next, glancing down your original path towards the front of the library.

“Good idea,” he stood, holding out a hand to pull you up too. A moment later, he was pulling you forwards, eyes wide.

“Jimin, what-?”

“Stay close,” he whispered dramatically, “lest we encounter the soul of a student who died of boredom here.”

Snorting, you pressed the back of your hand across your mouth and began to follow him. Somehow, the darkness seemed less scary with him beside you, less oppressive with a hand clutched in yours.

Before long, the front doors came in sight. They were automatic, and though you were still disappointed, you couldn’t say it was a shock when you stood in front of them and they didn’t budge. There were no handles to pull, but that didn’t stop Jimin trying to pry them apart somehow with his bare hands.

When you had recovered from laughing at him, your eyes drifted to the front desk.

“Hey, Jimin!” you cried, dashing over, “they have a helpline, right? Maybe we could reach security?”

Joining your side, Jimin was just in time to see you press your phone against your ear, having dialled one of the numbers displayed on a poster by the desk.

Foot tapping as you waited for the beeping tone to give way to another human, your heart dropped instead. Not far away, the ringing of a phone blared through the silence. Sighing, you began to drop your hand when the tone cut off.

“Hello?”

You rolled your eyes at the voice greeting you. Jimin.

A look up showed him standing behind the desk, receiver to his ear. He grinned, and the next thing you heard, he was talking once again.

“Sorry. I’m going to have to book your rescue in for another day.”

Stifling a laugh, you held his gaze and shook your head.

“…That… is a such a bad pun. I love it.”

With both your laughter mixing in the air, Jimin hung up and returned. Folding his arms on the desk, he grimaced, realising there wasn’t really a way out.

“What now?” he looked up at you.

Sighing, you turned, sliding your back down the wall to meet the floor.

“I guess we stay here.”

“I guess,” he echoed your heavy exhale, wandering around the table.

“Don’t just stand there,” you reached your arms out, “I might be scared. Come here and give me a cuddle.”

It was clear you weren’t exactly frightened anymore, if the grin on your face was anything to go by, but Jimin gladly obliged. He couldn’t believe his luck.

Tucking yourself in his arms, you curled up happily, while he worried about his heart giving out.

“I’m glad you’re here, Jimin,” you whispered into the night.

This was it for him. His heart was going to fail if you looked at him like that much longer, your eyes still gorgeous even among the dim light.

Just as he floundered for a response, seemingly struck dumb at such close quarters to you, his phone buzzed.

Briefly checking it, he chuckled.

“It’s just Taehyung.”

“Oh no,” you groaned, “we were all meant to be having a movie night at his tonight.”

“Nah, he’s the one missing out,” Jimin grinned, “we can raid the library’s film collection. I’ve always wanted to watch… what was it- A Studied History of Composite Rocks?”

Instantly bursting into reams of laughter beside him, you felt tears brimming again, of course for a different reason this time around. Jimin couldn’t help but join in, eyes fixed on your joy-filled face.

Still smirking to himself, he reached to quickly text Tae back.

Sorry, me and yn are stuck in the library

But if we ever do get out, I will be unavailable tonight because I will be screaming feral in the woods

Tae was surely dying of laughter on the other side. It was certain all your friends would know about this by tomorrow.

A reply lit up his screen.

I’m sure you will be ;)

I wouldn’t dare disturb you. Have fun lovebirds

Thank you so much for reading, and @jookiemonie for your request!

Check out my other drabbles here

Taglist: @aianloveseven @preciouschimine @kb-bangtanenthusiast  @ttaechwita 

#thebtswritersclub #purplearmynet #btscreatorscorner #park jimin imagine #jimin imagines #jimin scenario #park jimin x reader #jimin college au #bts college au #park jimin fluff #park jimin drabble #jimin fluff #boyfriend jimin #jimin hurt/comfort #jimin x reader #jimin x you #park jimin scenarios #bts drabble #jimin drabble

[serowotonin]

˗ˏˋ 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘀 ˎˊ˗

𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗿 ` sakusa kiyoomi ` 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁 ` 1.2k ` 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲 ` pure crack ` 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁 ` hcs `

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 ` umm idk what this is.. lowkey based off real events? midnight ramblings? yeah that kind of thing i guess... also big thank you to @kaguol​  for giving this a read (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) `

it was sports day at your school and most of the events were over and done with but the teachers didnt allow anyone to leave yet cuz,,,, reasons✨

which is why some of the students kinda just flocked to the gym to chill and maybe play around

that was until somebody suggested they host an unofficial, volleyball game

the net was still up nobody bothered to put it down so yeaahhh

rules of the game were simple: there were none, except keep the ball in the air and get it over the net…however you can

at first only a few ppl played… the “energetic” and “athletic” ones and it still seemed like a typical volleyball game

then more ppl started joining

and it slowly started getting more chaotic

it got to the point where the entire gym was the court

there were ppl running around chasing the ball, others just hitting it as hard as they can in practically any direction, then there were those who just stood there cuz everyone else was standing there so why not ??

now sakusa didn’t want to be there

he was tired because his class had signed him up for ALL the running events

why? well cuz he was tHe OnLy AtHLeCtiC PeRsOn in his class

utter bullshit btw

he plays volleyball hes not a runner

but still ended up winning tons of races just cuz… it was him💅✨ no explanation needed

n e wayss he was tired and wanted nothing more than to go home and take a nice long shower

but ofc the students of itachiyama wouldn’t let him

some of them dragged him into the game early on

again, because he was aThLeTiC ~

but this time they actually got the sport right lolol

honestly he was lowkey annoyed at how un-volleyball the game started to become but continued playing it anyway

it was hilarious how the others tried to receive even his weakest, half-assed spikes

sakusa always made sure to aim his spikes directly at ppl’s arms tho

not out of consideration for their pride or anything no no 

it was cuz whenever the ball touched the ground the ENTIRE gym groaned rlly loud and there’d be ppl going “NOOOOOOOO” 

and that annoyed tf out of him so he was nice with his spikes

then there was you

you were outside with one of your friends when the whole volleyball thing started and only came to the gym cuz the rest of your friends were in there

so you walked in, scanned the crowd, immediately noticed your crush *cough*sakusa*cough* and then found your friends standing in a group on the other side of the gym

now here’s the thing

sakusa has a crush™️ on you too. took him a while to realize and accept it but he did and now he officially has a crush on you

he just hadn’t really gotten around to the idea of asking you out or anything

mainly cuz he just very recently realized his feelings aka last night he was thinking about all the events he had to do for sports day and he groaned cuz ppl made him do it but then he realized ppl wasn’t actually ppl it was just you

you were the one who smiled at him and said “why not sakkun,, it’d be fun” and like that he agreed. then he realized further he actually thought about you a lot. like earlier he was thinking about how’d you look tmr since u weren’t gonna be in normal school uniform and you’d have your hair all done. and then he realized he was looking forward to seeing you which led him to realize you were one of the few ppl he actually enjoyed being around. THEN he fucking finally realized “oh… i have a crush…. on y/n……. oh”

somewhat conflicted abt it for the entirety of the day,,, bois experiencing feels for u ofc its gonna take some time >.<

he didn’t get to talk to you all day though,,,,,, he was busy with his own events and you were elsewhere

either way,, when he saw you walking past in the gym he kind of lost focus

lost focus in that the ball was coming to him and he jumped to spike it but only had his eyes on you causing his aim to mess up and well,,

he hit his target

*your head*

and because he wasn’t focused, it wasn’t a “soft” spike like all the other ones hes been doing 

it was a full-blown sakusa kiyoomi spike

that hit your face

(;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

sakusa just went: ᶠᵘᶜᵏ

you saw stars,,,,,,,, and fell on ur bum

like a split second later, you heard a calm voice asking if you were ok. you muttered out a yeah and felt arms helping you up

one of them was your friend you were pretty sure, but the other one’s hands were too big to be any of your friends’

“let’s get you to the nurse,” the calm voice said again. 

“mkay,, thats probably.. a smart choice.. yeah….” and, vision still blurry, you were guided to the nurse by your friend and someone whose identity you weren’t sure of yet

sakusa was still standing there

all that, the spike hitting you, you falling, your being escorted to the clinic,,,,, that happened in like 2 seconds

he didn’t even have time to say anything yet

to make matters worse, some random ass guy was the one who came and swept you out of the gym

sure your friend was with you but to sakusa,,, that guy sus af

after they left, the game continued and sakusa rlly didn’t feel like playing anymore

he wanted to make sure you were okay and wanted to apologize 

however,,,, the teachers came in shortly after and told them it was time for the closing ceremony

throughout the entire thing, his eyes flit through the crowds looking for you

he couldn’t find you tho>:((

big sad

after the ceremony was over,, he went to the clinic but you weren’t there

then he just kinda,,, /slump/

figured he’d just pull you aside tmr and apologize then

except,,, tmr came and he still hadnt found a good time to pull you aside for a proper apology?? 

you were just so… busy.?

finally,, at around lunch after you finished eating, you kinda just sat with your friends and were talking and stuff when sakusa decided now would be an appropriate time to apologize

he walked up to you and asked if you two could talk in private for a bit

your friends shot glances at each other. he saw,, but he didnt let it bother him

anyways,, he led you out into the hall and in the softest tone he could manage he says, “about yesterday… i’m really sorry, spiked the ball a bit too hard.. how are you feeling?”

you tell him ur fine,, just that it aches a bit but nothing serious

he nods and mutters another ‘sorry..’

then this happened:

“no it’s ok you don’t have to be so sorry. accidents happen.”

“it wasn’t an accident tho..? so im sorry, it wont happen again.”

“yeah ok,, wAIT WHAT?? wdym not an accident?!?? u spiked the ball into my face on purpose?!?!!?!?”

“WHAT NO- ofc not. i just,,, i kind of lost focus… on other things… at the time… and yeah”

“????”

*sighs* “i was focused on you when you walked past and didn’t consciously control my aim or whatever and ended up spiking it into your face”

“?!?!?!??…. why were you focused on me??”

“cuz i like you dummy” /it slipped he didnt mean to say this/

“oh.... wAIT WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?”

and that is the story of how sakusa confessed

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 ` honestly think it would be better as a fic but uh,,, my lazy ass cant be bothered to write fics rn so uh,, hope this was good for now? lol might mess around and write one later tho.. maybe `

#sakusa x reader #hq #www.pink-ink.com/writing #/hcs

[infernwetrust]

The Hotbox [Jim Mason x Duncan Shepherd]

Summary: A little look into how Jim and Duncan handle stress.

Warnings: smut, rough smut, fluff, drug use, apply tags as you see fit

WC: 1.9k

A/N: Idk what was going through my head as I wrote this, but I committed to it. Part of my little Duncan x Jim series that can be found on my master list, here. Thank you for reading! -Juno

GIF by queenxxxsupreme

Duncan laid in bed in his birthday suit, an arm behind his head. Laid with his head against Duncan's chest was Jim, also in his birthday suit. The two snuggled closely together, barely paying attention to the horror movie that was on the TV in front of them. Duncan with his free hand, scrolled through his Twitter feed, Jim occasionally glancing between his phone and the TV.

Marijuana smoke created a thick haze in their master bedroom, the smell calming for both of them. Today was a rough day, for the both of them. And for rough days, there was the nightly hotbox. It consisted of just Jim and Duncan, bare. No exceptions. They'd smoke until they were high off their asses or their lungs tapped out. Snacks and drinks were kept nearby for when the munchies struck.

The rules were simple. There were none. The only thing that could save them from each other's wrath in the hotbox was their safe word "Indica". Aside from their safe word, they could be as ruthless as they wanted to be, as they needed to be. Degrading names, within reason of course, rougher play than what Duncan usually brings to the bedroom. His chest was covered in purple and red bruises and scratches from when him and Jim first laid down. Jim was beyond agitated when he got home and it caught Duncan off guard when he had busted through the front door almost knocking the pictures off the walls.

It wasn't all rough play during this time, however. Sometimes their sweetest and most vulnerable sides came out and they'd make love to each other, slowly, round after round after round until one of them were to sleepy to continue. It was usually Duncan.

"Hotbox?" Duncan questioned as Jim stormed passed him

"Hotbox." Jim responded through a clenched jaw, quickly glancing back at Duncan.

And while Duncan had had his own frustrations with work today, it didn't cause him to come home the way Jim did and he automatically knew that he was Jim's for the night. That was a battle he knew he wasn't going to win. Although the roles were clearly defined, Duncan has subbed for Jim a couple of times. In fact, Jim is his first partner that he's ever switched for and he enjoyed it. Sometimes age really was just a number. Jim always fucked Duncan with the stamina he had in his younger years. Rough, fast, and sloppy, it made him a mess underneath Jim every time and that's how the both of them learned that Duncan was really vocal in the bedroom.

Tired of laying around, Jim got up suddenly, firmly pushing his hands into Duncan's chest as leverage, causing him to grunt. He watched as Jim walked across the room, bare-assed. He picked up the leftover joint they had tapped out on, placing it between his lips before reaching for a lighter and lighting it. He casually walked into their walk-in closet, grabbing one of his favorite ties that Duncan wore before walking back over to the bed. He snatched Duncan's phone out of his hand, tossing it wherever.

"Put this on." he said, throwing his tie at him and snatching the sheets off of him. "Lay the other way. Spread for me. Can you do that for me, Mr. Shepherd?"

Duncan nodded, quickly putting his tie on, tightening it just the way Jim liked around his neck, causing Jim to grin. One knee on the bed, he set himself comfortably between Duncan's legs, joint still hanging from his lips as he exhaled. He briefly removed it to lick his hand, grabbing and squeezing Duncan's length. Duncan sighed at the sudden contact of Jim's warm and wet hand, throwing one of his arms behind his head again.

"I swear you fucking trust-fund babies." Jim spat as he stroked Duncan at a painfully slow pace, still squeezing him. Duncan began chewing on his bottom lip, knowing what was coming next. To see his sweet ocean eyes be so condescending was more than a turn on. "Think your so fucking entitled to shit just because you have a little bit of money?"

"A little bit of money?" Duncan managed to get out between his heavy breaths, a small laugh behind his tone. Before Duncan could even take his next breath, Jim had has hand wrapped underneath Duncan's jaw, fingers digging in just a little bit to create that pressure that drove Duncan insane even though it made him mostly light headed. It forced his vision to just focus directly on Jim, ignoring all the other surroundings in the room.

"I didn't say you could speak, now did I?" Jim questioned, squeezing a bit harder.

"N-no." Duncan struggled to get out, lust in his hazy eyes. "But it's funny that you think that-," Jim's palm was already against the side of Duncan's cheek before Duncan could even finish his sentence.

"Always seeking a challenge huh?" Jim questioned again amused, letting up and going back to stroking Duncan painfully slow but with a menacing pressure. "Talk so damn much, so controlling, but you just want someone to fill both of your holes? Isn't that right?" With every word that Jim spoke, Duncan twitched in his hand, chest rising and falling rapidly. Jim picked up the pace quickly watching as Duncan threw his head back, biting down on his lip hard, a series of loud moans escaping from his mouth.

"Don't have any answers for me now do you, huh?" Jim mocked, rubbing at his own length. "Sigh. You fuck-faces never have an answer to anything. Maybe I should go around not giving answers too. I'll just swing my dick around, giving out stupid little flashy smiles, holding fake conversations so people like me better. Just like a little bitch." Duncan squirmed underneath Jim, thrusting upwards to meet Jim's frantic and wild pace. He could barely hang on with how soaked Duncan was from his spit-slicked hand and his own pre-cum. Surprisingly Duncan didn't last long with Jim 'chewing' him out like that.

"Pathetic." Jim said as he stroked Duncan out, watching as his cum painted his stomach and chest, Duncan moaning Jim's name with every squirt. Jim grabbed the end of Duncan's tie, using all of his strength to pull him up from the bed and closer to him.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." Duncan mumbled, still a horny mess as he looked him right in his eyes. He was practically begging for Jim through his fake "I'm sorry".

"I'm gonna show you just how sorry you can really be." He tightened Duncan's tie even tighter before pushing him back down on the bed and climbing over him. This was just the beginning of their night in The Hotbox.

But where was all this coming from? Despite Duncan letting Jim know that he didn't have to work and that he would always be taken care of, Jim still persisted, wanting something to do during the day. So he took up a part time job as customer service rep at a t-shirt shop on the board walk, owned by a friend's family. Jim loved his job to put it simply. And his boss and fellow co-workers loved him. He was a positive influence around the shop. Extremely friendly and optimistic, he kept everyone laughing and boosted morale. A master at the art of platonic flirting, most days he's stand outside the shop, with his shirt off or in one of the store branded tank-tops. He didn't even have to say much. People flocked to him naturally, drawn in not only by looks but his gentle persona.

He became a favorite around the boardwalk. Often people would stop to take pictures with him and he quickly became the social media ambassador for the shop's Instagram page. Duncan was also a favorite in the shop, sporting some of the graphic tees that they had to offer. On the days he would pick Jim up from work, they would almost always leave an hour after Jim was off, caught up in good conversation with the store manager or the store owner, his arm wrapped around Jim as he spoke.

But there was just this one guy Jim didn't get along with. Max. A super well-known rich kid, for all the wrong reasons, he got on Jim's nerves anytime the two worked together. Overly confident, overly cocky, but yet so fucking lazy barely helping out around the store or picking and choosing his tasks. He always got off easy, his parents having countless amounts of money to get their sweet baby boy out of trouble. It drove Jim insane. Today at work they had gotten into it real bad, throwing insults back and forth, almost resulting in an actual fist fight, broken up by Jim's close friend who also happened to work with him. By the time his left he was so heated and was missing Duncan extra this evening, so he was relieved when Duncan immediately offered the Hotbox when he entered the house.

Jim fucked Duncan relentlessly against every surface in their bedroom, not letting up at all, taking pleasure from hearing Duncan's bitchy whines and moans as he stretched him out thrust after thrust. The both of them now covered chest to abdomen in purple and red bruises. Duncan scratched and clawed at Jim, leaving hickeys wherever he could, which sadly meant that Jim couldn't have his shirt off at work tomorrow. The scratches down the side of his arms and back were easier to explain, so a tank top would have to do. With Duncan it was free reign, considering the dress code for his work office. He didn't care if they were visible on his neck, he showed them off proudly. Already an established man in life, he had no fears about his future.

"You know I didn't mean all that shit I said tonight right?" Jim asked, looking back at Duncan as they sat together in their bath. Duncan had his head rested against the wall, glass of whiskey on ice in his hand, staring back at Jim.

"I know." Duncan chuckled. "Trust me, I know, but it was so damn sexy hearing you say it because well you're not wrong." He wrapped his free hand that rested on the side of the tub around Jim, holding him close.

"Plus, I didn't really have any one to put me in my place during my younger years." he winked. "Also was a bit condescending and entitled, but hey, it got me ass left and right."

"You're terrible." Jim laughed, pressing a kiss to the side of Duncan's jaw. "Cute, but terrible. And you want to know the sad part? I'd probably be right there in your lineup."

"I wouldn't let you be. You're not like everyone else, ocean eyes. You mean the world to me and I wouldn't forgive myself if I just tossed you to the side."

"I love you s'much, Dunc."

"But I mean if you're willing to give up that a-,"

"Shut up and kiss me."

"Yes, sir."

Taglist: @jimmason @angelicmichael @whatcodysaid @9layerdevilfoodcake  @xavierplympton @guiltyfiend @mikhalxngdon @fernfiction​ @theneverendinghunger​

#cody fern #cody fern imagine #jim mason #jim mason smut #jim mason imagine #tribes of palos verdes #duncan shepherd x Jim mason #duncan shepherd smut #duncan shepherd #house of cards

[ithinkilikeit-reactions]

His lip was sore and he had a headache, but the sense of pride in his chest was what kept him up on his feet. Stumbling to the locker room, with people clapping a hand on his back in congratulations. His head was pounding. 

Undergroundboxer!Johnny had just won another match and even though he could barely stand up straight, he was riding a high. However the locker room was quiet, no one else except for him and the physical pain was starting to set in. He stumbled, sitting down on the bench in front of the lockers and blinking. He hoped the headache would go away, or the numb feeling in his joints or even the soreness in his busted lip. 

“Fuck.” He muttered under his breath, allowing his head to fall into his hands as his elbows rested on his knees. This was worth the money. Right? 

His headache was so intense, he hadn’t even heard you enter the locker room. You stood a good few feet away from him, taking in the sight of him and clutching the first aid kit. It broke your heart into a million pieces. Seeing him hunched over, clutching his head as his tattooed chest rose and fell rappidly. You had seen the whole fight and yes Johnny did win. But he had gotten hit, hard. 

“Johnny?” You spoke softly, not wanting to scare him. He looked up slowly, blinking a bit to focus his vision. “Hey.” He smiled, wincing at the pain of his busted lip. You approached him slowly, now standing inbetween his legs. “Oh honey.” You mumbled to yourself as you looked his face over. He was blinking, desperately trying to focus his vision on your face. 

“You probably have a concusion.” You said, noting the way he looked at you. Johnny appreciated the fact that you didn’t congratulate him. He knew you didn’t because you didn’t approve of this. You knew how damaging he was being to himself and you weren’t going to congratulate that. 

“Wouldn’t be the first one.” He said and swallowed thickly. The way the circular light shined behind your head, it really made you look like an angel from his point of view. “It should be the last one.” You commented and he laughed only to clutch his stomach in pain. “Ow.” He mumbled and you had to look away, fighting tears. 

How he could be so careless to his own state, it really hurt to watch. 

You distracted yourself by opening the first aid kit to grab disinfectant for some of his cuts. Hoping that he didn’t notice the tears that managed to slip. 

Johnny moved his hands to your hips, holding you as you got it all ready. He watched your movements carefully, noticing the tears but not saying anything. It was his fault and he knew that. “I’m lucky I have you to clean me up after this.” He forced a smile, not wanting to acknowledge any of the pain head on. “Yeah, I’m a real combat medic.” You joked around, following his facade. 

The grip on your waist tightened as you disinfected his cuts, the stinging being a bit much. “Fuck that always hurts.” He said and leaned forward to press his face into your stomach. Your fingers threaded through his hair and your tears started to flow even harder. 

“When are we going to stop faking it?” You choked out. You had been together for years, you had seen him get beat up for years. It was killing him, it was killing you both. 

“It hurts to see you like this. I don’t want to see you bleeding, I don’t want to joke around with you about how many concusions you have.” You said and Johnny was really starting to feel that the high from winning was wearing off. He looked up at you, his own eyes starting to fill with tears. “We don’t need the money that bad.” You added on, feeling your knees weaken slightly. But he held you up, no matter how in pain you were, he held you up. 

“Don’t leave me.” He said softly and held you against him. His words were something you had heard a lot before and as much as you had thought about it, you could never. You loved him too much for that. 

“I won’t. I can’t. You know that.” You said and sunk down onto your knees. He was sat infront of you, hands cupping your cheeks now. He was wiping the tears away the best he could, trying to make ammends with small actions. 

You grabbed his hand and started undoing the wrap around his hand. Johnny hated that you were breaking but still trying to take care of him. “I love you too much to leave you.” You said softly, avoiding eye contact in fear of the tears coming back. He wiped away his own tears, not wanting to crack like this but it was inevitable. 

Johnny opened his mouth to speak only for the door to the locker room to open, his friend walking in. “There you are. We gonna celebrate or what?” He asked, not finding the need to read the energy of the room. You couldn’t even bother turning to look at his friend, just looking up at Johnny. He wasn’t smiling, he had the love of his life who was broken in his arms because of him, of course he wasn’t going to go celebrate. 

“No man. Not tonight.” He said softly and his friend shrugged it off. “Fine, I’ll drink enough for you.” His friend said before leaving again, the door slamming behind him. 

You found your arms wrapping around his waist, tucking yourself further inbetween his legs and pressing your face into his bare chest. He allowed his hands to stroke your hair and hold you close as he swallowed thickly. Johnny had tears rolling down his face, guilt filling him. He imagined himself in your shoes, watching you get beat up almost everyday and patching you up every time you bled. He realised he wouldn’t have able to do it for so long, he realised how strong you were. 

Johnny’s head was still pounding, his vision was still blurry, but his thoughts were clear. Tilting your chin up to make you look at him. “I’ll take care of this, I’ll take care of you. I’ll get a real job or try my damndest too.” Johnny tried not to let you see him cry to often but he didn’t care anymore. You cupped his face gently, moving up and kissing his lips gently, not wanting to hurt his busted lip further. You moved some of his hair out of his face as he searched for the words to say to you. 

“I want a family, I want you. I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I want you always.” 

A/N: I wrote this and cried idk why. I got really in my feelings out of nowhere and have been majorly depressed ever since dinner and it’s now midnight so yeah idk. Enjoy this angsty Johnny blurb inspired by the ‘Punch’ concept. 

Feedback is kind!!

#nct #nct reaction #nct 127 #nct 127 reaction #johnny seo #johnny suh #johnny seo reaction #johnny suh reaction

[the-phoenix-heart]

How do Deku and Bakugou interact with both being double Lion ?

Oooh boy here comes my rant about platonic Bakudeku and their double Lions! (I also just finished watching Heroes Rising so my BakuDeku feels are stronger than usual-cause I’m a multishipper)

First of all, I feel the need to double down on Deku’s primary. He is a Lion primary. Does he want to save people-yes, but there are things about his character you have to consider. Mainly, he’s more focused on the goal of becoming the number one hero and saving people, than the people he wants to save. He doesn’t bond with communities, he bonds with the individuals he meets. But, he does think it’s the right way to live, so Badger primary model. 

And boy howdy do they interact with their double Lions. 

Bakugou for the longest time was a Glory-Hound Lion. He wanted to be the strongest there ever was and he wanted to be on top of everyone else. But, deep down he always felt like he was missing something. What he was missing was that Paragon Lion that Deku had. He liked his Glory-Hound Lion and he didn’t understand that you could have both. And he saw not naturally having a Paragon Lion as a weakness in himself, which is why he bullied him (doesn’t justify it but y’know it’s called character development. 

Deku meanwhile admired Bakugou’s Glory-Hound Lion. He saw Bakugou’s hunger for power and love of strength, and how it made Bakugou powerful and strong and he loved Bakugou for it (platonically! possibly...). 

But they couldn’t understand each other. Bakugou at the time couldn’t let go of his Glory-Hound Lion out of stubbornness and Deku couldn’t understand that his Paragon Lion was causing Bakugou to lash out. Notice, Bakugou only started to grow as a person when Deku left him alone more. 

Now, Bakugou did become friends with Kirishima-another double Lion with a Paragon Lion primary-but it was not Deku’s Paragon Lion. Bakugou grew up with Deku and his Paragon Lion and so he couldn’t accept it at the time, but Kirishima (who is has a small dose of Glory-Hound in him) was able to get through. 

And their secondaries, ever since the first scene of the show they’ve been standing on opposite sides facing each other down. Bakugou did not like how similar he and Deku were despite their differences, which is why Bakugou burned Deku’s secondary. Once Deku’s secondary was burned Deku turned to a Bird secondary model, which ironically Bakugou probably saw and thought, ‘I can do that better.’ Bakugou then used his Bird secondary model to bolster his own Lion secondary. 

And of course we have to talk about how their relationship with All Might relates to their sorting. Bakugou looked at All Might and saw a Glory-Hound Lion primary. This vision was wrong. While seeing that All Might was not wrong, he was wrong in assuming that’s whole All Might was. Deku saw All Might and his Badger primary, and copied it. 

And now we get to the Sludge Villain incident, where Bakugou is in trouble and Deku’s secondary unburns all in one day. This is when Bakugou starts to vaguely respect Deku, and it’s because of his secondary and how he just rushed in. It’s also because he doesn’t want to be in debt, but he still has some respect for him. 

Except what little respect there was shatters when he thinks Deku has lied to him. Lying is very important to Bakugou, in that he refuses to lie and if you lie to him he’ll kick your ass. Bakugou is pissed and immediately rushes in to fight him about it like the Lion secondary he is, and gets stopped. 

Then the first fight in Ground Beta happens, and we see their Lion secondaries really colliding with each other for the first time, they yell at each other and throw punches. Their first fight was not a pretty fight emotionally at all, it was ugly and taxing for both of them. 

We see it clearly on Bakugou’s face that his primary took a hit. He’s literally having a panic attack over losing. His primary isn’t burnt, but it has not escaped the fight unscathed. Failure goes against everything he knows about himself (as a gifted kid I relate), if he has failed who the fuck is he?! He gets over this by using his Lion secondary to drag himself out. If he just proclaims that he’s going to be the number one and surpass All Might then it’s gotta be true. 

And you see it even more clearly in the Sport Festival. At the beginning of the arc he proclaims to the entire country that he’s going to win. I can never get over this because it’s basically him forcing himself to win. If he fails then he’s a hypocrite and no one wants to be a hypocrite. Once again he uses his blunt Lion secondary to drag himself along. The idea that you can rely on you secondary to keep your primary from burning...that’s kind of beautiful, but I think you can only do that with an improvisational primary. 

And in the Sports Festival you see their secondaries on clear display. Especially Deku who breaks his body and yells at a guy until the guy faces years of Mommy and Daddy issues and severe trauma. Bakugou meanwhile fights everyone until his match against Todoroki. 

Todoroki is a Snake primary, who’s unsure what his quirk means to him since he’s just now faced his trauma. Bakugou, a Double Lion, gets pissed off when Todoroki ignores him because he’s his opponent and he deserves his attention. Bakugou proves just how un-Snake he is by telling Todoroki that his family and feelings don’t matter and all that matters is the fight. It almost seems like Todoroki has listened. 

Until the match happens and Bakugou fights and yells at him to use his fire aspect of his quirk. Todoroki only uses his quirk when Deku, house matched with Bakugou, does the exact same thing. Todoroki does it because it was Deku, someone he had bonded with told him. But, then he still can’t do it for understandable reasons. Bakugou finds out he won the fight, but Todoroki didn’t use his fire and that pisses him off more than anything. The idea that he didn’t win the fight fair and square is painful and pisses him off more than anything. He wasn’t more powerful than Todoroki, Todoroki just held back. That’s not a real win.

and then the school chains him to the podium and forces him to take the medal on national tv BUT THAT’S A TOPIC FOR ANOTHER DAY

(also All Might has no idea how to handle a Lion primary that isn’t modeling Badger. “Take this medal as a wound,” no All Might you’re just gonna mess him up further! He’s not SUPPOSED to be wounded!)

Then there comes the fight against All Might where they have to work together. This is after the internship arc, where Bakugou had a Snake secondary pushed on him (which he did not accept) and Deku finally got control of his power and leveled up. Bakugou sees this and it terrifies him. Why is Deku’s Double Lion loved by all but his is hated? For a while Bakugou doesn’t even try to get along with Deku and just beat All Might himself. Then he accepts defeat because he doesn’t want to fight alongside Deku-to him that would be admitting that he is weak. And Deku does the only thing he can think of to get Bakugou to listen-he punches him and says “LET’S WIN THIS KACCHAN!” Because fuck my emotions. 

And then they yell at each other, Deku trying to hype up Bakugou and Bakugou because LISTEN UP WE ARE GONNA WORK TOGETHER MY WAY! And even as they are fight/running from All Might they’re yelling at each other, but it works. They think on the fly and Bakugou fights All Might with all he has until he’s broken. And then Deku, about to win, turns away for a moment and sees Bakugou nearly passed out under All Might and does the most badass thing ever and PUNCHES ALL MIGHT RIGHT IN THE FACE!! HIS OWN MENTOR!! Just so he can save Bakugou. It’s beautiful. 

(Now is a good time to mention I’m writing this to the soundtrack for Heroes Rising and IT FUCKING SLAPS-or that’s just me loving instrumentals)

Then Bakugou gets kidnapped, and a little detour, Deku fully understands that he cannot be the one to reach out to Bakugou. Kirishima has to be the one because Bakugou trusts him. Kirishima and him are friends and Bakugou will let him save him, and Deku recognizes that. 

And then Kacchan vs. Deku part 2 happens, and it is the most Double Lion fight ever. Bakugou is literally venting his feelings at Deku by screaming and exploding him. Deku in turn is explaining how he has always admired Bakugou by yelling back and punching him. And this is another reason why he think he’s a Lion primary: Deku admired Bakugou not because he was kind or cared about people, but because Bakugou was strong and determined-those are Lion traits he admired.

He also says he starts to talk like Bakugou when he gets really into a fight-which makes sense since his Lion secondary was burned for so long and Bakugou was his main example for years. Rip me. 

By the way, Bakugou’s primary had officially burned before this fight. He literally asks if he was wrong to try and emulate All Might the way he did, why he had to be the one to destroy All Might. But, the fight with Deku and winning helps him unburn, or at least recover.

And then pretty much nothing happens in the show for season four but EVERYTHING happens in Heroes Rising and the manga and I can’t TALK ABOUT IT BECAUSE SPOILERS BUT TRUST ME THESE DOUBLE LIONS KEEP DOUBLE LIONING IT UP (and also possibly falling in love idk i’m an equal opportunitist with Kiribaku and Bakudeku)!!

#sortinghatchats #sorting hat chats #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugou #izuku midoriya #midoriya izuku #bnha #mha #this is a load of word vomit and i'm okay with that #because at the end of the day i talked about platonic bakudeku #and lion primaries which i'm starting to realize...might be my favorites? #noooo i'm supposed to hate myself and my primary!!! I'm burned!!

[fearfulkittenwrites]

Nightmares

Warnings: Talks about his parents a little if that’s something that upsets you, but other than that, nothing.

Word count: 1928

Notes: Hey there! So, a little disclaimer: I don't know all that much about Duke, so I just really hope his characterization is good. I also don't know if Dick is the one he's the closer to, but... I know more about Dick than I know about the others so I though it'd be best to use him??? Also, I really think he's the one least likely to be perceived as a threat in general, because he seems to be the one who just... smiles the most. And Idk, it made sense in my head. Now that we got that out of the way, I hope you enjoy this work!

Duke blinked his eyes open. His room was still drowning in darkness, so he sat up as quickly as he could and turned the lights on, vision blacking out for a moment. His eyes hurt because of the sudden brightness, but that was better than the unlit environment, so he rubbed them for a second, hoping it would make it better. Slowly, he managed to keep his eyes open, and looked down at his bare legs and sock-covered feet.

He was alive.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

He was safe.

It wasn’t the first night it had happened. Or the second. It wasn’t even the tenth time that it had happened, and we’re only talking about one month. He ran a hand across his face, feeling how sweaty his forehead was, and then slipped out of bed, walking towards the bathroom as his legs still felt a little bit funny, too light to properly carry his body around. He supported his weight on the sink, not wanting to face the mirror just yet.

The cold water helped. Duke felt grounded again, and, unfortunately, more awake. He sighed, face still dripping wet. Sleeping now would be near impossible. He stared into his own reflection.

“Why am I this stupid?” He shook his head, murmuring to himself “It’s just a dream.”

Letting go of the sink, he patted his face dry, coming back to bed. He checked the time on his phone. 3:41.

“Fuck.” All that he managed were four hours, if that, of sleep. Again. And he was no Tim Drake, meaning that functioning during the day would be a big problem.

He laid his head on the fluffy pillow, staring at the ceiling for a moment. He wondered what to do.

He knew that all of the other bats had the same type of issues. Mostly because some of them would wake up screaming in horror, even when they were just taking a nap on the couch. Jason, Damian and Tim had them like that. Cass and Dick never screamed, but they always shot awake quickly and broke down sobbing soon after. He was sure Bruce had them too, but he never saw the man sleeping. He just put two and two together, noticing how his mood changed and how much sleep he seemed to be getting, and assumed he would get them just as often as any of his kids.

He knew all of them would wander into each other’s rooms at night, when they couldn’t sleep. As usual, not because he had been told, but because he had seen Damian and Cass leaving Dick’s room in the morning way too many times. The same thing happened to Tim and Jason, who seemed to often invade the other’s space. But that didn’t stop both of them from searching for Dick frequently as well. And the older boy would, occasionally, be spotted leaving Jason’s room.

He wondered how that worked. If they had a code, or a calendar, any sort of system that had been set up in the past.

He wished he was part of that system.

He checked the time again. Two minutes had passed.

Time was ticking too slowly. He was tired, but sitting alone in the dark was definitely not a good idea right now.

He’d have to ask for help.

Duke swallowed, analyzing his options. Damian was an angry menace, so he was off the list. Cass was scary and the one member you most definetly don’t want to piss off, which meant the risk was too great. Tim wouldn’t be such a bad option, but if he wasn’t out on patrol then he’d be working on one of his projects or homework, in a coffee induced mania. Which meant no. Jason was nice. They got along fine. But still, there was something about him that was always on edge, a little too wild, unpredictable.

Which left out one option. Dick Grayson.

And he was not exactly a great one either.

The teen swallowed.

“Well, it’s now or never, Duke.”

He stepped out of the bed and walked to the man’s door. He stared at the wood’s detailing for a longer time than what he had originally planned on. He raised a shaky hand and gave it three weak, quick knocks.

“Hm...?” Comes the answer.

“Uhm, Dick?” Duke asks “Sorry to wake you, I just...” he couldn’t bring himself to finish the sentence. There was some shuffling on the other side of the door, before it was swung open carefully.

“Hey there.” Dick smiled, blue eyes half closed and voice still raspy as he leaned on the doorframe “Can’t sleep?” Duke shook his head “I see. Come in.” Dick gesture him to enter. Duke noticed he had a nightlight on, making the room dark enough to sleep, but light enough to see in “Want me to turn on the lights?”

“No, this is fine.” He answered, watching Dick lay down again. The older man tapped on the bed slightly. Duke didn’t quite get the message.

“Duke. You can sit.” Dick said gently.

“Oh. Right.” He nodded.

Dick studied his movements as he carefully sat down, back towards him.

“Duke,” He asked, pushing himself up on his elbow “What’s going through your mind? Like, right now?” He asked “Be honest.”

The teen sighed.

“That I shouldn’t be here. Shouldn’t have woken you up. I’m sorry. You’re always working so much, I shouldn’t be so selfish, you need to sleep, and...”

“Okay, calm down.” Dick sat up next to him, shuffling to throw his legs off the bed “Why did you come here?”

Duke winced. He regretted everything and wished he had just dealt with it by himself.

“I-I had a nightmare and I couldn’t sleep.” He answered “I’m sorry, I know that’s not your problem, I should just...” He tried to get up, but felt Dick’s hand on his shoulder and stopped.

“Hey,” He called, calmly “Don’t say stuff like that. You’re my brother, Duke. I’m here to help.” Duke looked into the other’s eyes, bright blue lights staring into his soul “Okay?” Duke nodded “Good.” He rubbed his back a little, and Duke slowly eased into the touch “Something tells me this isn’t the first time you had a nightmare.” Duke bit his lip “That’s okay. Why didn’t you ask for help?”

“I... I didn’t think I could.”

Dick tilted his head to the side.

“Why not?”

“I mean... You guys seem to have your system or whatever. I didn’t want to get in the way.” He answered, staring at the floor. Dick frowned, confused.

“System?”

“Yeah,” He answered “I’ve seen you guys waking up on each other’s rooms and all. I know you must’ve worked out a way of... I don’t know. Helping each other, I guess? And I didn’t want to cause some sort of imbalance.”

Dick went quiet for a while, thinking.

“Duke,” He started “We don’t have a system.”

“You don’t?” He looked at the other, who shook his head slowly “But then how does it...” He gestured vaguely, trying to convey a message. Dick grinned.

“Whenever one of us can’t sleep, we go to someone’s room. That’s all there is to it, really.” He explained.

“But... What if someone walks into a room where someone else is having a rough time too? Like, what if Tim goes to Jason and he’s also having a nightmare or an insomnia espisode? Or if Damian comes into your room but Cass is already here?”

Dick shrugged.

“I don’t know how the others deal with it, but if I’m having a nightmare when someone comes in, it’s a relief for me too. And the beds are big enough to fit three or more people.”

Duke thought for a moment.

“So there is no system?”

“Nope.” Dick answered “And just to make things clear: you can knock at my door whenever you need to, alright?” Duke nodded “Great.” He smiled.

It made Duke feel at home. The nightlight kept the room in a comfortable gloom, and nothing here seemed threatening or dangerous. A big teddy bear was sitting on a chest of drawers, surrounded by three smaller plushies; a cat, a bat and a bunny. He had too many pillows on the bed, and every piece of furniture was painted on the lighter side. A real contrast to the man who jumped from buildings and kicked faces for a living.

“So... The bad dream,” Dick started, carefully “What was it about?”

“My mom and my dad.” He looked down again “I was... They were chasing me. I was in a forest and... They didn’t know who I was, and I was running, it was dark and I kept stumbling, falling, tripping on roots and stones... And then...” Duke made a choked sound, and covered his mouth, feeling embarassed.

“It’s alright.” Dick whispered, hand rubbing circles on his back again.

“And then... The Joker was there. And the forest was gone. But I don’t know where I was, it was so dark and I couldn’t see anything, except for him. I tried to run, but I was paralized, in that weird dream way, you know?” Dick nodded, and Duke nodded with him “Yeah. And he didn’t say anything, he just... laughed and laughed and laughed... And then I woke up.”

“That sounds awful, Duke.” He said, soft eyes and understanding voice.

“It... It was.” He felt an arm across his shoulders, and he leaned into Dick’s chest. His shirt smelled like laundry detergent.

“Yeah. But you’re safe now. I’ve got you.” The man gave him a squeeze, resting his chin on the top of his head.

“I- I know.” He answered “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

They stayed like that for a while, until Duke trusted himself to speak without crying.

“How do you...” Duke started, and Dick let go of him so they could properly talk “When someone sleeps here, how does that happen? Like, where... Where am I supposed to sleep?”

“In the bed?” Dick tilted his head again.

“But... Isn’t it, like, weird?”

“Oh...” He raised his eyebrows “I see. Not really, no. Usually we cuddle, but that’s not mandatory. Cass is the only one who isn’t always wanting to, but even if she doesn’t want to touch me, the bed is big enough so that we don’t have to. Look, if you want to, you can use the couch, but I strongly suggest against it.” Duke looked at the small sofa placed against the wall. He’d have to curl up in a weird position to sleep in it.

“I think I’ll take the bed.”

Dick tapped his back slightly.

“Good choice.” He smiled, turning around to lay down again. Duke mimicked the action, placing his head on the pillow. Dick’s were much softer and fluffier than his. Not in a bad way, just different.

It felt odd. The bed smelled distinctly like his brother, but he was unsure on which product had that effect; the aftershave, the cologne, the deodorant, the shampoo, the hair pomade... Maybe a combination of all of those. Weirdly, it felt comforting. Safe.

He turned around, laying on his side and curling up a little, like he always did. Dick had his back turned to him.

“Hey, uhm, Dick?” He whispered.

“Yeah?” The other murmured sleepily.

“I was... M-maybe... If we... Like, would it... U-uh...”

Dick turned around.

“It’s okay.” He said, wrapping his arm around the other “Like this?”

“Y-yeah.” He stuttered “Thank you.”

“No worries, baby bro.” He grinned “Good night Duke.”

“Good night.”

#batboys #batfamily #batbros #BatFam #batman #batman bingo 2020 #Duke Thomas #Dick Grayson #Duke Thomas & Dick Grayson #Duke & Dick #Nightmares #Comfort #hurt/comfort #i guess ahaha #if you count nightmares as hurt ahaha #:p #requested works #fanfic #fanfiction #writing #Batbrothers #sibling bonding #batbros bonding

[amphtaminedreams]

Paris Haute Couture Week S/S 2020 Plus a Little Jacquemus: Okay, Dior DID Suck (Part 2/2)

Hi to anyone reading,

First of all, thank you! I have never had a post do as well as the part 1 of my haute couture week review did and I am so overwhelmed with the positive feedback. This is probably funny to read for those of you getting thousands of reblogs on your posts, me acting like I won an academy award because I got a couple of hundred, but honestly I don’t expect any traction when I write on here (it’s basically just me word vomiting everything I’m thinking as if people want to hear it aka. mouthing off into what I thought was the void) so if you did read it, thank you! I do spend a long-ass time on these so it means a lot:-)

I’ll leave the self-indulgent ramble there though as it’s probably not what you came for and jump straight into part 2 of my thoughts, starting with Jacquemus. Yeah, I knew what I was doing when I tagged that in my last post. Simon Porte Jacquemus is the man of the *fashion* people right now; I’ve even found myself coming round to the Le Chiquito bag despite my original thought being “well, that’s fucking useless”. I know, I know, technically it’s not haute couture; it was part of Men’s Fashion Week, but it happened around the same time and everyone was talking about it on Twitter, so I feel like I have to include it.

In a way, it kind of reminds me of Bottega Veneta’s last RTW show, in that, especially with the women’s outfits, we seem to be sticking with simple, fitted garments and chunky, more statement jewellery. I’ve got to say I like the styling here a lot more though, and in general I’m a fan of this collection. The collared tops with cut outs underneath blazers are cool and I can’t wait until it gets warm enough for me to not feel dumb wearing my headscarfs like this; there’s a LOT of summer outfit inspiration. It’s not a mind-blowing collection or anything but it is effortlessly sexy and that’s something I wish I could say about myself. Most of us can only hope to look half as good as these models do whilst making the effort but at least Jacquemus is aspirational, lol. 

I also fucking adore this colour palette. I’m sick of neutrals literally just meaning brown and white; the navy, sand and muted khaki is a fresh edition to what is usually interpreted as the colours you’d seen worn by Disney’s Riverboat Cruise staff and only Disney’s Riverboat Cruise staff. And I mean, come on-what is more neutral than typical English school carpet blue.

Next for the whole reason I had to make this haute couture week review 2 separate posts: Jean Paul Gaultier’s final show.

In the best way possible, it’s a lot. I don’t even really know where to start, except to say that I guess this is a fitting last show; a celebration of everything campy, messy, weird, performative, and punk is the perfect send off for a brand whose best known perfume of the last few years is called Scandal. More than anything, the final show represented the range of characters and cultures that have influenced JPG throughout his half-a-decade-long career, the lines that supposedly separate what is “masculine” and “feminine”, “old” and “young” and ultimately art and fashion blurred in the most exaggerated way possible. Sure, there are some looks which are individually a bit messy here but the way they were grouped into almost chapter-like segments meant that when you see them all together, they work. Nods to the patterns and structures that recurred from season to season were sprinkled throughout, from sailor stripes to corsets to the expected whirlwinds of colour. I’ll even allow the wellies in that one outfit; if I can get over bucket hats in Peter fucking Pilotto’s last RTW show, I can get over some questionable shoes here. Middle aged fishermen and boys who liked to pose with monster carp in their Tinder pictures as some weird display of masculinity everywhere rejoice.

Now onto a show that I personally found slightly disappointing: Margiela.

I think this one is a bit TOO weird for me. Like if you’re gonna go avant-garde, go all out. Chiffon gimp masks (I don’t know if that’s the intention here but that’s what I’m getting, sorry Maison) are something I’m not particularly fond of and I’ve never been a fan of the Tabi boots in the first place, let alone when they’ve seemingly been blown up to Michelin man style proportions. I didn’t find the show to be a total lost cause-I enjoyed the colour palette and I’ve always liked that contrast stitching detail, plus the bowler hats are interesting-but on the whole considering how much I liked the last RTW show, this is a bit of a let down. 

The looks I included are salvageable but (I feel mean saying this) there were genuinely a lot of pieces that did just resemble bits of fabric draped over each over with no discernible rhyme or reason, so much so that they reminded me of some of the monstrosities I saw at a Drag Race pub quiz this one time where we had 5 mins to make some garms out of loo roll and then have a team member model them for points down a makeshift runway. 

Ralph and Russo was alright. There were a few pieces that I really liked but again, I can’t help but compare this collection to the last, where it felt like the fussy details of bows and sequins and feathers and the Barbie Dreamhouse palette were utilised with a direction in mind. Here, I don’t get that. As ever, the gowns are gorgeous and I’d pay good money just to try one on for five minutes but as an overall collection I’d say there was a lack of higher vision, which is probably the snobbiest sentence I’ve ever written so forgive me.

As for Ronald Van Der Kemp, I could’ve done without including it to be honest, if it weren’t for the few pieces I’m in love with: the velvet cape, fur trimmed jacket and blue satin dress are probably my favourite pieces here.

So onto a collection I liked a lot more: Schiaparelli. 

The influence of nature from flowers in bloom to insects to the organic structure of the human skeleton is as present as ever, though this collection includes a lot more delicate symbolism than usual. Honestly, the details make it for me; the brooches, earrings and facial jewellery are other-worldly touches to outfits that could otherwise be simple fashion magazine editor on-the-go. That’s not in itself a bad thing! The suits are gorgeous. I mean, I’m talking fashion editor in New York in a power suit yelling orders down the phone while she rushes along with a coffee. A Miranda Priestley in the making type woman. THAT’S a modern take on the divine feminine that Maria Grazia should’ve been going for; our goddesses aren’t women who sit around looking pretty (though that helps too) and place curses on mere mortals anymore, they’re women who get shit done. 

With regards to Valentino, which was also a delight, let me start by saying this colour palette is EVERYTHING. It’s ugly sisters in Cinderella fantastic, and we know those 2 were the real fashion icons really. Other than that, I adore the Old Hollywood silhouettes from the gloves to the Liz Taylor-in-Cleopatra-level-dramatic earrings. Everything is opulent and expensive-looking and pretty much what we’ve all come to expect from Valentino. A strong 8/10.

For me personally, Viktor and Rolf was a standout and one of my favourite collections of haute couture week. It’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea and I know it’s at the complete opposite end of the spectrum to what was probably my other favourite collection, Elie Saab, but this is just my style down to a T, the perfect balance of grungy and cutesy that I want to achieve. 

There’s probably going to be a lot of objections to the temporary face tattoos and I get that, but I think they’re fucking sick. I obviously wouldn’t get a permanent one lest my mother murder me in cold blood however if I did, you bet I would be pairing them with frilly-ass babydoll dresses that you could pick up in Camden Market like this. 

And last but not least (that would be Dior), there’s Zuhair Murad.

Sigh.

IDK, man. Seeing Zuhair Murad dresses on Tumblr and WeHeartIt (remember that site? It still exists!) as a 14 year old was one of the things that got me into fashion, so it sucks that almost every time a new collection comes around, I feel underwhelmed. Disappointingly, the brand hasn’t really progressed all that much since 2013. It goes without saying that the stoning and the embroidery and sequins are stunning and would make anyone feel like a princess but from a critical point of view, I’m just not seeing anything new here. Whereas I feel like Elie Saab, for example, reflected the growing fascination with East Asian fashion and recognition of the supremacy of the region’s street style in his haute couture last collection, Zuhair Murad seems to be stuck designing the same dresses he was 6 years ago. 

To pick one example, the rounded stoned necklines are so outdated that they’ve been making their way onto department store prom dresses for years. I get that it’s supposed to be a reference to Ancient Egyptian style and I respect that, I was one of those 8 year old that was obsessed with mummies and the “Curse of Tutankhamun”, but couldn’t it be done in a more interesting way? It’s Maria Grazia’s spin on Ancient Greece all over again. Now I get how how the I imagine very niche subsection of people who are into fashion and Julius Caesar (okay, so I don’t even know if they still believed in mythology and all that malarky at that point in history but just roll with my comparison here) might’ve felt going through Vogue Runway. Anyway, I hate to end on a critical note and so be clear, these are still absolutely magnificent dresses. If we ignore those ugly round necklines, that is.

So that’s it for this post! If you read part 1 and 2, I hope you enjoyed it! As always, let me know your opinions and feel free to disagree. I’m literally just about to start trawling through all the A/W 2020 RTW collections though I imagine that’s gonna take me way longer to do than this, so I wouldn’t expect that for a month or two. In the meantime, I’m trying to fit shooting a Euphoria-inspired lookbook into my days off work which is looking atm like it’s going to be the end of March, so look out for that, and also a review of the red carpet fashion from this season’s award shows. 

As ever, thank you so much for reading and again, thank you for the reception on part 1 if you were one of the people that read it. It makes staying up til 3am with the jitters seem worthwhile, lol! 

Lauren x

#haute couture #haute couture week #pfw #pfw2020 #paris #fashion #fashion week #designer #jacquemus #style #review #dior #sequins #pretty #aesthetic #zuhair murad #grunge #viktor and rolf #valentino #luxury #schiaparelli #georges hobeika #maison margiela #margiela tabi #jean paul gaultier #jpg #jpgaultier

[mousehole5000]

more tgcf chapters 143-173 lets goooooo

PEI MING BOO HISS except actually okay he’s mostly funny i think but still boo hiss

“hey who’s this guy who’s really pissed at you?” “oh thats my sword. i broke it.” alright then!

i think i need to go back and reread the banyue pass arc bc im still confused as to whats going on with banyue and pei su

“Banyue dropped from the sky with two pots raised. Without a word, she plummeted with the mouths of the pots facing down, trapping and detaining the shocked Ming’guang and the roaring Ke Mo within.” - THATS MY GIRL

“It must be known that, to heavenly officials, it certainly was more than natural for kingdoms of the mortal realm to fight and annihilate one another; the acts of these plays progressing on endlessly. But when it came their own turn, it was often hard to let things go. If one must stand in the same court as the one who annihilated their own kingdom, and that man cavorted in the heavens, exceedingly flashy, then it must be vexing.” - hmmmm!!

“I’ve spoken too many words in this lifetime. What are you referring to?” - okay to be fair thats a mood

okay its nice to get some pei ming backstory and its funny that he and xie lian are bonding but also still whenever pei ming interacts with a female character my hackles rise like a cat lol

“Xie Lian watched as Banyue thought really hard before cheerfully pulling out a few long, wine-red scorpion-snakes, and putting them into the bubbling pot.” - THATS MY GIRL

“Although “smell” was something colourless and formless, the instant Banyue removed the pot cover, it was as if some mysterious physical object had twisted all the air around the mouth of that pot. The group stared at the sight within the pot for a long time. Their pupils reflected an endless, bottomless darkness; like it could pull them into the abyss. No words could describe the sentiment expressed within their eyes. A moment later, Xie Lian patted Banyue’s shoulder and gave a thumbs-up.” - like father-figure like daughter-figure. amazing.

“However, what if one day mortals discovered something completely new that ran faster than horses? Then, when this new invention overtook horses, worshippers of this heavenly official who controlled horses would inevitably decrease. Such heavenly officials, flashing by like shooting stars, made up the majority of the heavens.” - obsessed with this, genuinely. life and change. worship and its purpose. my religious studies diploma on my wall is screaming at me rn. ALSO i am once again thinking about celebrities

“...” It was only then that Pei Ming seemed to notice, and started to contemplate this question. A moment later, he answered, “A habit. In a dark, creepy place like this, isn’t it normal to hold women in your arms, to comfort them and calm their fears?” “I’m sorry, but I wasn’t scared,” Banyue said.” - BANYUE I LOVE YOU. I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. god this takes me back to every college party i ever went to

LING WEN BACKSTORY????? shoeseller chosen for godhood bc she wrote a political essay and got arrested...... and now she’s face to face with the official who appointed her..... do go on.....

“Ling Wen laughed out loud, seeming to be enraged, and her voice dropped. “Very well! You said I couldn’t reach that high. Then, might I ask you: had the prominence of the Palace of Jing Wen at its peak ever reached even the knees of my Palace of Ling Wen??” - GET HIM!!!! BOO HISS JING WEN

“Compared to you, I’m not that bad,” Ling Wen said. “You’d personally order me to stay in the Palace of Jing Wen until midnight, then turn around and say I shamelessly hang around ‘til late to harass you. Words murder without form; I was much nicer responding with blatant violence.” - ling wen im love you..... also this bit... feels Real

BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN!! FLOWER PETALS TRANSFORMATION!!! see hua cheng? look as how cool it can be when you leave the story for a little while!! bc then you get to return and make an entrance!!

“Not only can you bring forth bloody rain, you can also make flowers shower. I didn’t know that. How fun!” - cute!! and in that moment we were all xie lian

“Everyone was stunned by his deed, and Ling Wen arduously gave him a thumbs-up. ”Ol’ Pei, what a man!” Pei Ming gritted his teeth. “WELCOME!” - aww three two tumors buddies!!

okay yin yu is here and xie lian did the equivalent of asking someone when the baby is due only to find out theyre not pregnant at all. then rong guang taunts yin yu and no one says anything. i do love the amount of awkward moments in this book tbh sometimes there are no words.

“All around was sand and mud crushing at him, exceedingly suffocating. The sand and mud was also moving endlessly; the feeling was like he was swallowed into the stomach of a giant monster, and that monster had also eaten a bunch of other things besides him, tumbling everything in its stomach, trying to digest” - ooooh creepy!!! the red string thing... is cute.... also xie lian being able to see hua cheng’s butterfly vision by looking directly into his eye is kinda cool. and obviously homoerotic.

“Are lower-ranked heavenly officials below other people?” Quan Yizhen asked. “No,” Yin Yu replied. Were they not? It was obvious that he himself didn’t believe in his own words, and Quan Yizhen also noticed. A good while later, he said bluntly, “I don’t like it here.” Yin Yu said nothing.” - im having emotions. and then yin yu also saying he doesnt like it there either.... also idk how this scene is going to play out but as much as im enjoying quan yizhen being an icon i can also possibly see how yin yu could eventually get to the point of “i am tired of being nice. i do just want to go apeshit” even if he really cares about qyz. it happens </3

“Indeed,” Hua Cheng said. “Half a year later when Quan Yizhen actually ascends, he won’t find it so funny anymore.” “Can we watch that part too?” Xie Lian asked. “We can. Hold on,” Hua Cheng replied.” - quan yizhen king of taking things literally. also why did this turn into hualian having a movie night

jian yu seems like the kind of asshole who would purposely give someone regular soda when they specifically asked for diet soda. god yin yu is really having a bad day i really feel for him in the whole situation with the brocade immortal

awww okay at least jian yu tried to take responsibility. im still mad at him tho that was objectively a terrible idea. god this whole situation sucked :(

“Rocks and earth crushed at them from all around, forcing their bodies to press tightly against one another, their faces brushing, their ears warm. Although it wasn’t the right time, a thought flashed through Xie Lian’s mind: “‘To die buried together’ doesn’t feel so bad.” - okay... im kind of emotional.... gay people....

okay obviously these murals and the prince of wuyong have some connection (im guessing pretty direct) to xie lian and are important but everytime they start analyzing one i feel like im back in art history class fhadskfhskjdhf not that thats a bad thing!! i liked art history a lot tbh

“Don’t worry, they’re not human,” Hua Cheng said. “It’s precisely because they’re not human that we have to worry, alright….” Xie Lian thought.” - goth ghost bf problems

xie lian: well, there is one person i trust more than anyone else, someone who’s first in my mind hua cheng, oblivious: oh :/ xie lian, also oblivious: what? hua cheng: you shouldnt trust so easily its dangerous xie lian: oh. haha. yeah. well. wanna,,, know who it is? hua cheng: its :) fine :) it :) doesnt :) matter :) but of course you can tell me if you want to gege xie lian, internally: well now ive made it weird hua cheng, 5 minutes later: actually i need you to tell me. right now. its totally for your security me: gay people smh

“As they suspected, he had been captured by Qi Rong. Although no one was bound by ropes, there were balls of greasily green ghost fires hovering over every one of their heads.” - completely off track but anybody else remember the great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts song

“Could there actually come a day when Qi Rong was embarrassed that someone might see the manner in which he ate? Before Xuan Ji entered, she put Guzi down. Guzi, ta-ta-ta, ran in, rushing straight to Qi Rong’s side. But when he saw him, he pointed his finger. He cried, “Dad is eating bad things in secret again!” “I’m not!” Qi Rong retaliated.” SCREAM IS QI RONG LEARNING THE POWER OF LOVE NOOOO also god that poor man whose body he has im starting to doubt if he’ll ever be free jimmy novak flashbacks

everytime we get another ghost king power somewhere someone should be writing hua cheng the cyborg bf in a high tech futuristic au i think thats the only other potential setting that could truly capture this wild ride

“In truth, throughout history, there was no man in the world who didn’t love bragging. A breeze could blow the handkerchief of a brothel girl into a man’s hand, and he would turn around and say the most beautiful of renowned escorts had fallen in love with him; holding shoes and wiping benches for the emperor’s mistress’s uncle’s grandson’s cousin’s mistress would for sure become him being an important administrator at the residence of royal relatives, raising his status. Thus, men who didn’t brag were a rare species.” - SCREAM this is going in my favorite tgcf quotes folder god... mxtx come here let me shake your hand

read the story of rain master yushi huang’s ascension. why am i crying. also this bit im crying again me with my stuffed animals “Thus, while Yushi Huang was cultivating at the Temple of Yulong, every time when she went to seek water and passed that door, she would rub the head of that ox. The door knocker soaked in her essence of life, and when the Rain Master ascended, the ox ascended with her.”

okay thats enough for now i have 7 more chapters to book 4!!! woo!!!

#tgcf liveblog #bedtime now but im excited to be moving on #mouse mumbles

[cyanidefilledcandy]

I’m about to talk about death, so...

So, last night, I had another dream about my little sister. Oddly enough, I don’t dream about her super often and I was and am both...disturbed and grateful for that.

It’s not unusual for me to dream about dead relatives I was close to. My grandmothers (my paternal and maternal and maternal great grandmother), I dream about frequently. (My paternal grandfather not so much, and that makes me sad and makes me feel like I must not have cared about him enough. ...though, the real culprit is likely memory. He died when I was in middle school; my grandmothers all died when I was in adulthood.) 

Usually when I dream about them, it’s like business as usual. It’s literally just mundane life things. We’re just going about our regular lives, and they’re just there like they had been when they were here. We talk a lot of the times, but it’s nothing significant; just regular conversation and they’re....just there.

With my sister, it’s been the complete opposite.

In EVERY dream I’ve had about my sister, she’s been dead. Except for one I had recently, and in the end, she just turned into my niece. And if she looks to be alive, then the dream will remind that she’s dead. Like one I had...

It was another of those mundane dreams where she, my mom, and I were in car driving, and she was in the backseat and we were just bantering. The subject of her pregnancy came up, but again, nothing out of the ordinary. We were just talking about how many issues she had. I jabbed at her that next time she would be in Georgia or a better hospital or just somewhere with better doctors. And she just kind of gave me an incredulous look and was like “WHAT next time?” and I just kind of stopped and was like “....oh right...” Cause she’s dead... And I’m honestly surprised that I thought that.

Again, usually in my dreams about my dead relatives, there’s nothing out of the ordinary to even suggest that they’re dead. And my sister and I used to have back and forths like that frequently, especially when her first child was born. I’d say something like, “When are you having the next one?” and she’d be like “Not.” Or “who?!” So for that to happen...

Maybe it’s because I felt....feel her death harder than any other I’ve experienced in my life...but I hate that even in my dreams, I can’t seem to think of her in any other context. As if there’s no reprieve from this most unfair reality. But last night’s dream was especially weird.

I was with someone...maybe it was my mom, and we drove up to the cemetery. I paused for a moment before getting out of the car. The other person turned to ask me, “Uh...do you know whose grave this is?” as if asking if I was SURE I wanted to get out and look. And I answered in a kind of “duh” fashion. We buried my sister next to my paternal grandparents, so I figured I could pay some respects to both of them. So, I got out and turned to their graves and they were covered by a plastic tent to protect them from the elements. I noticed it looked like a heavy storm was brewing like a hurricane or something. I then looked back to the graves and my sister’s coffin was out of the ground, open, and empty. It also looked like it had been ransacked. The lining in the lid was torn almost off and the was hanging out and getting wet in the muddy ground.

Of course, I was outraged and just as I was about to start a fight with someone, out a small building in the distance (the mortuary I somehow knew), out walks the female mortician who handled my sister, along with my maternal grandmother. They were both carrying my sister back to the coffin.

I instantly relaxed, knowing my grandma wouldn’t let anything bad happen to her. The mortician explains that they had to do something... I don’t remember what it was, but it was likely something that would only make sense in a dream. I nodded and waited for them to put her back in. This part is a bit fuzzier, but other members of my family were suddenly there and everyone was trying to prepare her coffin....or something. There were these little cloth dolls of I guess family members and people were trying to figure out which ones they wanted to keep and which ones they wanted my sister to be buried with. I remember they kept exchanging them or something, and they were some kind of collectable? Again, that part is really fuzzy.

The mortician finally puts my sister back and kind of haphazardly drop her in the coffin, like she was too heavy and she just couldn’t hold her anymore. Of course, I don’t like this, but figure I’m no one to criticize someone at their profession. My sister ends up not even fully in the coffin and the bottom padding is missing. She’s also wearing the wig I just bought, which looks amazing on her and much better than the one I ended up picking IRL. And then all of a sudden, she starts convulse every few seconds. Like a twitch or jump of her limbs and eventually, her mouth starts to hang open. Almost like she’s having a seizure. 

The mortician or my mom or someone tells me that “Don’t worry. Sometimes dead bodies move involuntarily and it means nothing. I’m annoyed because this is something I already know, even if part of me (I guess my waking mind) knew that she was way too animated for this to just be muscle spasms. 

The spasming gets worse to the point that she falls completely out of the coffin. This time however, her eyes open and her mouth is shut (because morticians wire them shut). She keeps convulsing and I’m repeating in my head that “this doesn’t mean anything. this doesn’t mean anything.” But suddenly her head goes back and her eyes are staring at me, desperately and I immediately know a horrible mistake was made.

Have you guys ever seen The Haunting of Hill House? That scene where Olivia has a vision of an adult Nell dead before she rises and desperately tries to beg Olivia to save her...this was very similar to that. She was even dressed in red like Nell was in the show (I had her dressed in red because it was her favorite color). Except my sister looked like she wanted to move and couldn’t. Like her body was too stiff and her mouth was wired shut, so she couldn’t speak and looked like she desperately wanted to.

So, I immediately go “Something’s wrong. We were wrong! She’s alive! Someone help her!” And I had a few people trying to calm me down. They weren’t exactly denying the fact just trying to calm me down. I get more and more frantic and weirdly see some kind of countdown...

And 3, 2, 1, I woke up and my sister was still and silent and I realized I had went through that all in my head. They ended up reburying her and my grandmother stood beside me crying. I hugged her and tried to give her words of comfort. I told her not to worry because her other grandmother and grandfather (the grandmother I was talking to’s husband) and Pepper (our childhood pet) were all looking after her. Again...the grandmother I was talking to is also dead and she died before my maternal grandmother did, so....that was weird...

The next part is a bit fuzzy, but I wound up having a conversation with my sister. We just casually talking about her experience of....dying and being buried? It seemed and felt like one of my other mundane dreams about dead relatives, but I knew very well that she was dead. She told me she was tired of the dolls she was buried with (those weird collectable family dolls) and she said a few other things, and mentioned that she just didn’t have an appetite and some other things where she was just sick and uncomfortable (similar to all the stuff she went through while she pregnant). I told her, “I’m sorry, baby.” And she said a couple other things again very casually before I woke up. 

Oddly enough...I felt strangely calm and peaceful when I woke up.

I don’t know if this is common or not, but my dreams MAJORLY affect my mood and usually whatever feeling I was feeling when I was dreaming carries on with me when I wake up. And not JUST when I wake up; it stays as if it happened to me IRL. Just like yesterday, where I had another apocalypse dream where me and my mom were at odds, and I was depressed all day yesterday. Or a major dream I had long ago where my sister got shot and was dying right in front of my eyes and I had to try and carry her to the hospital. I’ll never forget how she looked in that dream....literally dying. Usually when I dream of someone dying, it’s like a movie death. This dream was eerily realistic with how she was dying. ....that dream had me depressed and physically sick for days after, and has stuck with me... (I wasn’t kidding when I said my sister dying was my worst nightmare...)

I guess it was because we were just talking like normal. However, once I thought back on the dream and the strangeness of it, Depression set in fast. Though, it wasn’t so much the dream than I just feel that loss all over again.

IDK...I kind of wanted to document this dream because the strangeness of it, I guess. Some things I think I know what they mean or represent and others are just...weird...

Visiting the grave is obvious... I think the changing of her hair and shoddy state of the coffin is my own insecurities and unsatisfaction with how her burial was handled. Everyone tells me I did a good job with picking out everything, but I wasn’t satisfied at all with how she looked and I keep imagining if by some miracle I DO see her after death, that she’d have a few choice words. ...jokingly and good-naturedly, of course, but still...

I didn’t realize it until after I woke, but the convulsions she had I thought looked seizure like...and I wonder if that’s what my mind thinks happened in her last moments... I wasn’t there, but my mom just describes it has blood coming out of her eyes, nose, and mouth. That wasn’t present in the dream, but she also says that when she went, my mom couldn’t get her mouth to close...and the dream, her mouth was open when the convulsions started.

When she falls to the ground and looks at me desperately to help....I think it harkens back to a thought I had when she first died that maybe she wasn’t really dead, but in a deep coma and she would wake up in the coming days. Even after we buried her, part of me still held on to the belief that she wasn’t really dead and had the horrible idea of her waking up in her coffin under a ton of concrete and couldn’t get out (which has always been a deep dark fear of mine for myself). It’s a dumb thought...not only was she autopsied, but embalmed. I know it’s dumb, but when I said I went through every stage of grief at once, I mean it... Part of me is still going through all of those stages at once...Part of me is still searching desperately for a way to go back and save her from this fate...

Denial and bargaining...

The rest I’m not so sure about... I don’t know what the family doll things represent and I don’t know why my dream acknowledged that all my relatives were dead, except my maternal grandmother. I know her being with the mortician was just knowing she was in good hands with my grandmother. Maybe me dreaming of comforting her was just me wishing I had her here to go through this with... But who knows?

I know this was a HELL of a long read. I don’t expect anyone to actually read through this shit. I just wanted to get it out and....analyze it I guess. And also just...DO something with this grief instead of just replaying the dream in my head on repeat all day...

If one of you DID read this, I appreciate that you think so highly of me to read through my long-winded ramblings. ....and I’m also sorry for that because I’m not worthy of that. But, I love you dearly.

#death #a lot of fucking death... #dream journal

[vaguekiwi]

72 Hours

idk. Last weekend was hard, I process through writing. Here we are 😅😅

72 Hours

Summary: Tony is hospitalised, Peter has to sit in the waiting room.

Word Count: ~1000

Other Inspiration: Below My Feet by Mumford and Sons | What If This Is All The Love You Ever Get? by Snow Patrol

Warnings: Major grief and angst, mention of hospitals/critical medical condition, hurt with a tiny bit of comfort, ambiguous ending

Peter’s heart had been broken before.

Whether it was the disappointing shudder from what-could-have-been with Liz, or the reeling betrayal from Quentin Beck, or even the mind-numbing world-shattering grief from the passing of his parents and Uncle Ben, he was always left with the same feeling afterward.

The feeling that there was a blunt cleaver in the middle of his chest. A knife that just sat there, festering and heavy. Occasionally someone would grab it, promising to pull it out, only to push it around more with an unpracticed hand.

The cold of the blade seeped into his diaphragm and made it so he couldn’t warm up. The hole it left behind always felt like it swallowed him from the stomach up, left his nerves frayed at his fingertips and toes.

This was the feeling Peter had been left with the past few days, made worse because he was not just enduring the pain of heartbreak but also the uncertainty of not knowing if it would stick around.

The cleaver went in the moment he picked up the phone and the voice on the other end said, “Peter Parker? This is Metropolitan Hospital, we have you registered as the emergency contact for Anthony Stark.”

That had been nearly three days ago.

Peter sat perched on the edge of a chair in the corner of the hospital waiting room. He couldn’t sleep; if his body and mind were charged with enough adrenaline, the spider bite didn’t let him sleep. The nurses kept coming by, telling him to go home, promising they would call him as soon as Tony woke up.

If Mr. Stark wakes up, was how they put it. The if kept pinging around Peter’s head, floating behind his eyelids when he blinked. He knew they’d said it on purpose, to avoid a lawsuit at the very least, but he wished they had just lied. Had just given him the false impression that Tony would be absolutely fine.

He’d only brought his phone with him, he hadn’t known how long he would be here. Ned brought his charger 12 hours later, and then Peter subsisted his time either curled up on the straight-backed waiting room chair or seated against the wall, tethered to his phone cord. He wasn’t sure why he felt so adamant he wanted to have his phone, the doctors who had new information were right in front of him. But it helped, made it feel like he wouldn’t miss anything.

It also gave him something to do, instead of just watching the swinging doors leading to surgery.

For a while, he did what work he could on his phone. Brainstormed ideas for a biochem paper, answered emails to colleagues and peers about a group project. He kept trying to play a game or scroll on Instagram or something, but he couldn’t get his mind to focus. He passed the headline Tech Billionaire Hospitalised one too many times and finally decided to inform the rest of the world he’d be offline for awhile.

Hiatus to handle real life 😢 he posted to Twitter. He updated his Discord bio and made his Snapchat and Instagram stories a black screen with the words 😫 busy, gonna be offline! 😫

He didn’t actually think it was necessary. The people that mattered to him knew what was going on, but he did it because it gave him something to do.

It filled up twenty minutes.

Then he went back to Subway Surfers, but his fingers were trembling too much so he stopped after five minutes.

The cleaver hadn’t moved in his heart. But, fortunately, no one had tried to touch it either. Things always got messy when other people tried to fix him, tried to dress a fresh wound when they didn’t actually know what to do except offer chocolate or hugs or ambiguous advice like it’ll get better.

“Peter.”

Peter had been staring at the same spot on the wall so long his vision had blurred. He blinked dry eyes and turned, ignoring the throbbing pain in his head.

“Hey Ned,”

Pepper Potts and Colonel Rhodes stood further away, they each nodded to him and waved a little bit. Pepper approached one of the nurses.

Peter’s focus shifted when Ned settled in the chair beside him, clapping him on the back.

“Have you eaten anything, man?”

Peter shook his head. He drew his knees closer to his chin and his gaze shifted back to the doors.

“There’s a Chipotle just down the street,” Ned said, but Peter wouldn’t look at him. When Peter didn’t say anything for a while, Ned hummed and offered, “I brought my Switch. We could Smash to pass the time?”

Silence.

“Or Mario Kart?”

Silence.

“Splatoon?”

This was the hard part. This was the painful wrenching around of the cleaver by someone who meant well and deserved all the love and appreciation in the world. But Peter didn’t want to play video games or eat. He just wanted to wrap his arms around Tony’s neck, wanted to feel the strength in his grip and warmth in his gaze. He wanted to go back to Friday and tell himself to relish the movie and cold pizza and cuddling because he didn’t know it but that might be their last date night.

Something damp nudged his leg and it made Peter jerk a bit. But he smiled when he saw the plastic water bottle. He tried to say “thanks” but only managed to croak out something completely unintelligible. Ned nodded his understanding, and that was the right move.

That made the knife pull out just a bit.

Peter sipped the water, the cold sparking in his system and immediately making his throat clamour for more. 

But the bottle stilled halfway to his lips when a familiar surgeon, Tony’s surgeon, pushed through the doors into the waiting room.

The doctor looked around, caught sight of Peter, and hurried toward him.

Peter felt a coldness in his chest now, a new weight as this woman prepared to either twist the blade or pull it clear.

She cleared her throat.

“Mr. Parker?”

#starker #starker fic #tony stark x peter parker #angst #grace writes

[hoeforbilly]

second chances

i have a bunch of requests (thank you thank you thank you) and im doing my best to get them out to you as soon as i can! hope you like this one!

request: "Could you write an imagine, where Billy cheats on the reader and she catches him in the act. He doesn't realize how much she affected his life/ how much he loves her until shes no longer apart of his life. He tries to win her back. (Maybe happy ending?)" @schulky56

warnings: idk if i should mention there's swear words here? maybe? well there are lol

genre: a lil angsty, a lil fluffy

word count: 1.6k (yay finally something longer)

"It's not like we were ever that serious" Billy's voice was quiet and you couldn't help but laugh at his words. He was on sitting his bed, the girl right behind him, wearing one of hisshirts. You felt sick looking at them.

"What do you mean we weren't serious? you said with a bitter laugh. "Don't even answer that." you decided, turning on your heel and heading for the stairs.

"Y/N wait!" he sounded behind you but you didn't want to look back, tears already gathering in your eyes. Your heart was pounding, and you felt your hands starting to shake. You almost made it to the door but Billy caught up to you. You slowly turned around to look at him.

"Look, I really didn't think you were serious about this so I didn't know this would be such a big deal and..." you didn't let him finish.

"We both know that's a lie Billy" was all you said before leaving his house, getting in your car and driving away for good. To think you came over to check in on him after he didn't come to school that day. You felt disgusting knowing he just used you, he did exactly what people said he would and fucking cheated on you, like you were just another girl to cross off his list, add to a collection of thropies. Tears clouded your vision so you pulled over and put your car in park. "This is not real" you said to yourself, as you sobbed. You were pathetic and you hated that you let Billy do this to you. You hated that you trusted him and that he made you believe you were special enough for him to stay with you. "I'm so fucking dumb" you cried.

A few weeks passed and you slowly managed to pick yourself back up. You were very successful in avoiding Billy at school, you ignored every question and story you heard about him and just went on with your life. Your heart still ached for him, you were worried any time you wouldn't see his camaro parked in its usual spot but he hurt you way too much for you to just forget about it and run to him.

Billy thought he really wouldn't care. You were just a girl and he wasn't the type to cry over a girl. He did feel guilty when he saw you cry as you drove away but he expected that to be it. A quick moment of sadness and then back to the schedueled programming.

He walked back up to his room, he did leave a gorgeous girl all alone in his bed after all. He layed next to her and she cuddled up to him and Billy swore he felt sick to his stomach. He stayed like that for a second before jumping out of bed.

"You have to go" he mumbled. And so she did. She got dressed, cursing him under her breath and left his house. He had no idea what was happening but he felt so fucking empty. His head was aching, he grabbed a shoe box from under his bed and started gathering your things. A pen you let him borrow on his first day in Hawkins. Your chemistry notes he took to study from because he didn't have his own. A sweater you forgot to take as you left his room in a hurry, trying to avoid Neil's anger. A hair tie. A note you left in his locker. He felt his cheeks go red as he looked at what he had left of you. "What the fuck Hargrove" he whispered go himself, running his fingers over the sweater. "Why the fuck would you do that".

He felt awful. He didn't realize how special you were to him until you were no longer there and he just didn't know what to do with himself. He tried to talk to girls but they just couldn't compare to you. They weren't funny like you. They didn't have your laugh. God Billy was whipped for you and he only realized after you were out of his reach. He intended on giving you back all the things you left at his place but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He was miserable. Seeing you made him feel even worse, he just wanted to walk up to you, apologize and kiss those beautiful lips of yours. But he neved did, knowing you probably hated him.

The streets of Hawkins were almost empty, it was just past 8pm, the sun was slowly setting, the sound of rain hitting the roof of his camaro nearly putting Billy to sleep. He dropped Max off at the Wheeler's house and decided to take the long way home, not really wanting to have to deal with Neil just yet. The shoebox filled with your belongings was placed in the backseat, just in case he got the guts to finally return in to you.

He saw a figure appear on the sidewalk seemingly out of nowhere. The weather was no ideal for a walk but he didn't really care, happy he was seated in the comfort of his car. As he approached the person he started paying more attention to them. A big red hoodie with the strings pulled to protect them from rain, sweatpants and white sneakers. He took a closer look and realized it was you. In his red Hawkins Pool hoodie. He felt like his heart was about to jump out of his chest. He slowed down and rolled his window down.

"Y/N it's raining. I can give you a ride" he gave you a small smile and tried go swallow the lump in his throat.

"Thanks, I can walk. My house isn't that far anyway" you answered politely, not even looking at him. Your house was in fact very far away, at least a 20 minute walk. You thought he wouldn't remember anyway.

"Except it is far" he noticed with more confidence in his voice. "Come on, it's not a big deal. I don't want you to get sick".

"Okay" Billy's heart skipped a beat when you said that. You quickly walked over to the passenger door, getting in and taking off your hood. The car smelled just like you remembered. The leather seats had a lot of wear to them but that's what made them so special.

"So how have you been?" there was a shakiness to Billy's voice that you didn't recognize but you decided to ignore it.

"Good. A lot of school and stuff" you didn't wanna go into detail of how wrong it felt to not be with him. He nodded and hummed, acknowledging your words. "What about you?"

"Same old, same old" he sighed. You spent the rest of the drive in silence. Billy opened his mouth a couple times but ultimately decided not to say anything, as it would probably be super dumb anyway. Pulling up to your driveway he cursed himself for wasting a chance to talk to you.

"Thanks Billy" you smiled at him and unbuckled your seatbelt. "Do you want to come in?" your eyes widened in shock at what you just said. Not once during the drive have you thought about inviting him in and you had no idea where in suddently came from.

"Sure" he answered casually. Inside he was freaking out. You got out of the car and ran to your door, the rain was way more intense now and neither of you wanted to get soaked. You sat on the couch and just kind of looked at each other awkwardly. Billy broke the silence with a deep breath.

"Listen Y/N, I'm really sorry for what I did" he started, as he leaned to you a little, eyes glued to his hands. You did not expect to hear any apology from Billy Hargrove, and this one was really genuine.

"I mean we weren't technically dating. You never asked me to but I just assumed and..." your voice caught in your throat when he finally looked at you.

" I regret what I did and I regret not asking you to be my girlfriend. I was so dumb and I just didn't realize how much better my life was with you" he admitted. You stayed quiet for a while, surprised at his sudden confession.

"I get that you probably don't care about me anymore" he added and you shook your head.

"I do" you have him a weak smile. "I always cared about you Billy. That's why I stuck by your side for so long."

"Can we try again?" you saw how scared he was to ask that question.

"I don't know if I could trust you B."

"We don't have to go straight into dating. I just... I just really want you back in my life. You can go out with anyone you want and I can wait as long as it takes before you trust me. Even if you never wanna date i just wanna be your friend" it took you a while to process his words and he was getting more nervous by the second. "Please?" he reached out for your hand and you nodded.

"Okay. We can try that" the smile he gave you after that made your stomach do multiple flips. He pulled you into a hug and never stopped grinning as he held you close to him.

"Thank you. I won't waste your time, I promise".

Billy Hargrove was not one to make promises. But he knew he would keep this one.

~

~

~

here it is, hope you like it! 💜

#billy hargrove blurb #billy hargrove smut #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove #billy hargrove fc #billy hargrove fanfic #billy hargrove fic #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove fluff

[purplesurveys]

833

Given the chance, would you ever go into space? I’ve answered this exact question on a recent survey...but yeah absolutely, as long as it was a free opportunity. Outer space has always interested me so it would be awesome to actually get there. What is your all-time favorite thing to snack on? A local brand of chips called Nova, corndogs, powdered fries, and pizza. I couldn’t choose just one :( Have you ever been jealous of anyone's socks? Not in a toxic way but I have seen socks that made me go “damn, I wish I had that” and it’s usually socks based off of famous paintings like Starry Night, The Scream, etc. Do you match your clothing, or are you careless about fashion? The most I’ll match is colors; I’ll make sure the colors I wear complement each other. But I’m not likely to buy outfits that come in parts, like a matching top and skirt that have their own price tags. It’s an annoying scam that makes you have to pay more money for one outfit lol. Know anyone that has amazing fashion taste? There’s a professor in the communication research department of our college that dresses SOOOO well. She’s never recycled an item of clothing either. She dresses literally exactly like Audrey Hepburn, except with more printed clothes.

Do you know or wish you could knit? I don’t know how to knit and have no desire to learn.

Like earmuffs? They’re alright, I guess? I never have to wear them, so I don’t have much of an opinion. Have you ever had the roof of your mouth sore? Yeah, that one time I ate takoyaki while it was still burning hot and I burned off the skin on the roof my mouth. Do you like orange juice? I’ll drink it if it’s served or if it’s free, but I never crave for it. How many times a day do you brush your teeth, honestly? Once or twice. Do you think anyone really looks good in a jumpsuit? Yeah. Well it’s since become a trend so that’s really all there is to know about people’s preferences nowadays. I have several jumpsuits that I feel really good in. Have a collection of anything? Not anymore. Ever ran out of something that made you very upset? Sometimes my family will bring home leftovers from a really good restaurant. When we finish them all up it bums me out. Biggest lie you ever told? Saying ‘yes’ with a big ol’ smile on my face to my high school guidance counselors whenever they ask if my situation at home is good. Is there a song that makes you want to rock out? For sure. I have my fair share of favorite punk/rock bands. Do you have a religion? No. Believe that there is a point to churches? Not a single one. How do eat Oreos? I just bite into them. Never really got into the whole twist-lick-dunk thing because 1) I don’t want to bite into something I had already licked (even if it’s my own saliva lol), and 2) I can’t consume a lot of milk, anyway. -This or That- Sunsets or sunrises? Sunsets. I’ve seen more sunsets than sunrises with Gabie, so I have good memories of them. I don’t like the idea of getting up early just for a sunrise either. Pennies or dimes? Can’t relate because we don’t use these concepts. Coffee or tea? Coffeeeeeeee. Never been a tea person, actually. Windows or Mac? Mac. I did use Windows for a while, but when it comes down to it I would rather get a Mac. Headphones or speakers? Headphones. You get more of the sound when you listen to music, so the listening experience is a lot better. Loud or soft & quiet? Depends on the context...I like my concerts loud, but I obviously prefer soft and quiet when I’m doing something like going to bed. Odd or even numbers? I don’t really have a preference lol. The cookie dough or the actual cookies? Cookie dough, heh. Speaking of, I recently found a recipe for edible cookie dough but I keep putting it off... Mp3 players or iPod? iPod, mostly because MP3s went out of style like, a decade ago. Calm or rock music? Again, depends on my mood. I’d listen to rock music if I’m pissed off or going through a similar emotion, and I’d prefer hearing calm music when I wanna focus on something, like if I’m doing surveys. Love or lust? Love. I don’t feel lust for the most part. Converse or Vans? Converse. They’re AJ’s favorite and I find them more comfy. The few times I borrowed my sister’s Vans I always got blisters at the end of the day. Lipsyncing or actual singing? I would prefer to lipsync than to let people hear my actual singing voice; but if I’m watching a performance obviously I’d want the performers to be using their real voice. Walking or running? Walking. I find strolls to be relaxing. Dancing or watching others dance? Watching others. Dancers are crazy talented. With friends or by yourself? When it comes down to it, I wanna be with friends. Local concert or a popular band? Popular band. It’s rarer, so I find it more precious. I still support local though! Blond or brown hair? Brown. Idk, I just don’t know a lot of people who are blonde. Red or black? I like both, but I like black slightly more. Blue or green eyes? Green. Having fun or being asleep? Having fuuuun. Carnival or park? Park. I can’t go on rides anyway, so a nice stroll and picnic at the park sounds lovely to me. -Favorites- Favorite thing to buy? Uh food, I guess? I’m super easy to please lol. What do your favorite pair of socks look like? My bacon and eggs one. Kind of tea/coffee? Iced tea/iced caramel macchiato. Way of communication? Face-to-face with Gab, instant messenger/text for everyone else. Time to sleep in to? Midnight is most convenient for me. Band to dance to? PARAMORE. Also helps that their music has turned dance-y too. Favorite gum? Don’t really have one. I’ll chew on any kind/flavor of gum. Type of cereal? Cookie Crisps. Color of hoodie? I don’t mind color, as long as the hoodie is comfortable and keeps me warm. Spice? Cumin smells lovely. Favorite thing to touch/feel? Dogs. Website? Probably Twitter. I’ve been on it the longest and still have no reason to be tired of it. Person in your life? My girlfriend...but also my dogs, if they can count. -Would you Rather- Hire one of your friends, or fire an enemy? Hire one of my friends, as long as they work well without me. Firing an enemy seems a little bit more unprofessional, especially if they objectively perform well. Be a contestant on American Idol or America's Got Talent? I’d go with AGT I guess? I’ve watched some snippets of the show and their judges seem more nice, whereas on American Idol the judges tend to laugh or embarrass you if you do badly. Live in Britain or Australia? Australia. I feel like it’s a more Filipino-friendly country, not that Britain isn’t but yeah. Travel by plane or helicopter? Plane. Aren’t helicopters loud? I think I’d be more relaxed in an airplane. Trade places with a male or a female for a day? I’d rather remain a woman, thanks. Shop at Wal-Mart or Target? I don’t know. I’m honestly curious though – for the Americans survey-takers, what’s the difference between them and what do y’all prefer? Hahaha Read Shakespeare or Artistotle's work? I internally winced at both lol but when it comes down to it, Shakespeare. I do like his work, as long as I’m reading a modern English version. I hate philosophy straight up, so that’s a definite no on Aristotle. Have a regular donut or donut holes? Regular donut. Spell better or smell better? Smell. I can already spell well. Rather be in a tornado or a large earthquake? This is horrible, no one ever *wants* to be stuck in a natural calamity. 80's or 90's music? I like the 80s sound better. Eat a plain peanut butter sandwich or PB & J? Peanut butter sandwich. I tried PB&J before to see what the hype was about, and it just didn’t work for my Asian tastebuds. Wear a uniform every day or go half-naked? Wear a uniform. I wore one in Catholic school for 14 years and survived, so it’d just be the same thing. Would you rather Santa or the Easter Bunny actually exist? Santa. I’m more familiar with him. The Easter Bunny’s not really a part of our culture so I don’t actually know what it’s supposed to do. Apple pie or Pizza pie? Pizzaaaaa. Y’all should know me by now haha. Spend an afternoon cleaning or clean things later? I’d rather work early so I can be satisfied earlier. Flying or X-Ray vision? Flying. Dentist or Doctor? I guess dentist? There’s fewer reasons to be scared when you go to the dentist because the health problems are just limited to your mouth, I guess. Would you rather spread gossip or start a fight? Both sound awful. I’m never one to start a fight and I never initiate gossip myself, though I do take part in it sometimes. Get rid of your favorite shoes or your favorite pants? Pants. I love my shoes. Visit Florida or New York? New York. Myspace or Facebook (or do they both suck)? Facebook. It sucks, but at least the memes there are hilarious as fuck.

#survey #surveys

[the-everlasting-dream]

No - Drake x MC

Summary: Elizabeth’s reaction to King Liam’s request from Chapter 2 of TRH

A/N: Oh look who’s alive and decided she remembers how to write. Thats right, I’m back with some subpar fiction and I hope you like Elizabeth’s honest reaction to the fiasco that was the beginning of this book. Some lines are obviously from the dialogue.

Word Count: 3408

Warnings: Swearing.

Tags: idk who even reads anymore so  @chantelle-x0x , @choicessa​, @mariamulroney , @drakewalkerwhipped​ , @quartzandarrow​ ,  @mfackenthal​ , @srawesleyghuewrites​ , @topsyturvy-dream​ , @enmchoices​ , @gardeningourmet​ @debramcg1106​ , @alesana45​ , @meladoridarcy, @blackcatkita​ , @tmarie82​ , @annekebbphotography​ , @lizk77​ , @jayjay879​ , @tornbetween2loves​ , @akrenich , @theroyalweisme , @likethetailofacomet​ , @sleepwalkingelite​ , @littleblossom-18 , @ooo-barff-ooo​ , @drakewalker04​ , @mkatschoicesblog​ , TRR only: @speedyoperarascalparty , @carabeth​ , Drake: @fairydustandsarcasm , @drakewalkerisreal​

‘To ask us if our future baby would be the ruler of Cordonia?’

The words rang in Elizabeth’s ears, the sound of her own voice alien to her as what Liam was alluding sunk in.

‘Liam.’ Her mouth moved but it was Drake who spoke, tone laced with disbelief.

‘I... I don’t know what to say. My kid sitting on the throne...’

My kid. Our kid.

They’d talked extensively about kids in the past month, agreeing that while they still both wanted children, it would be nice to spend some time together first as a couple. Surely Drake would say no. The next words that came out of his mouth shook Elizabeth to her core.

‘I mean it would be an incredible honor.. I don’t know what to say..’

She turned to gape at the man she now called her husband, remembering vividly how he’d described how excited he was to take their little one on the same camping trips like his own father had done, teaching them the art of making the perfect smore, giving them the life he wished he could have had. That picture of a little boy or girl with Drake’s hair and her eyes, a perfect mix of the two of them firmly planted on his shoulders seemed to evaporate when she heard those words.

‘Elizabeth. What do you say?’ Liam’s blue eyes turned on her in expectancy.

‘No.’

The word was out of her mouth before she could control herself but she didn’t want to take it back. She watched both their faces fall and straightened her spine, swallowing hard. ‘No. No Liam. I wish I was sorry but I am not. I’m not giving my child up for anything.’

‘Walker,’ Drake started, reaching for her hand but she wrenched it out of his grasp.

‘No. I said no.’

Seeing his mouth open again presumably to reason with her, she turned on her heel and stormed off down the beach. Anger boiled in her veins like never before, searing hot; she could barely think straight. Liam to coming here  — on their honeymoon, no less — and asking them for their literal unborn child was insurmountably selfish.

Hadn’t she giving up enough already? Was getting kidnapped, shot at multiple times, having the man she loved almost bleed out in front of her not enough? Was she to sacrifice her future family just because the king of Cordonia couldn’t get a date?

These and a thousand other venomous thoughts were swirling on her mind as she stalked off, heading in no particular direction except away from the conversation.

‘Walker wait up.’

Elizabeth did nothing to slow her pace as she heard Drake jog up to her. ‘Walker would you just stop for a minute? Elizabeth!’

Jerking to a halt, she waited until he was in her line of vision before fixing him with a poisonous look.

‘Jesus what was that?’

‘I could ask you the same damn thing. What the actual fuck Drake?’ She spat, not caring if anyone heard her.

‘Liz c’mon. It’s not like the kid wouldn’t be ours still.’

‘Drake do you even hear yourself? I thought you of all people would be with me on this. You’ve spent your entire life hating the nobles for their stuffy ways, you’ve ranted to me on enough occasions about how pretentious and prim and stuck up and snobby they are. Now you’re turning around and saying you’d sign our child up for that without a second thought?’

He pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing. ‘Walker, c’mon you know it’s not like that..’

‘Then tell me what it’s like!’ She screeched, her voice shrill as it no doubt carried down the beach to where the rest of their friends were waiting. ‘Because to me it seems like you’re willing to drop and show your belly every time Liam asks you for something. Have you forgotten you have a wife now or does my opinion weigh nothing?’

‘You know that’s not true Elizabeth,’ he snapped back angrily and some part of her was glad to see the reaction, any reaction. ‘He’s got a good reason. We married for love. Don’t you think Liam of all people deserves the same?’

‘I do. You know I do. But his happiness shouldn’t come at the price of ours.’

Drake ran a weary hand over his face. ‘Don’t you care about the future of Cordonia?’

She paused momentarily thrown by his question. ‘What I care about is the future of my family. Something that you obviously don’t share. I don’t get it Drake. I really don’t. You of all people know how dangerous the life of a monarch is. Assassinations, poisonings, coups. Did the situation with Anton teach you nothing? And the worst part is that you didn’t even think to talk to me about it? You’re happy to just agree with whatever ridiculous demands he dreams up!’

Drake glared at her. ‘That’s bullshit and you know it.’

Hot tears pricked the back of her eyes as Elizabeth met his gaze. ‘We promised each other that we would have each other’s back. All the time, one hundred percent. All we talked about after this whole wedding shebang was to have a normal life, the two of us and the family we would have together. At least that’s what I thought we both wanted.’

The look on his face told her that her words had been driven home. They stared at each other in silence for a long moment.

Say something. This is our first real fight. Say something. She begged him silently, watching as Drake opened and closed his mouth several times but no words came out.

‘I’ve got a beach ball here with both your names on it!’

Maxwells voice cut through the tension. ‘What better way to work through some newly wedded strife than to slap a ball at each other huh?’ He shot a grin at them before wrapping a hand around each of their arms, leading them toward where the others had all gathered.

‘Beaumont this is hardly the-‘

‘Splendid idea Maxwell,’ Elizabeth interrupted, snatching the ball angrily out of his hands. ‘You’re on my team.’

-

Tensions boiled hotter than the afternoon sun as the game took place on the sand opposite the villa.

Elizabeth barely made a sound the whole game, concentrating her entire effort on hitting either Drake or Liam in the face. It would have solved anything but it would have made her feel a whole lot better, she decided, spiking the ball towards her husband. She rolled her eyes as he flawlessly intercepted it, sending it sailing over the net to Hana. She didn’t forget how Liam was readily avoiding her eyes, tapping the ball sympathetically over the net towards her as some kind of convoluted apology. She hit the ball again, harder this time, treacherous thoughts of Rumplestiltskin and baby snatcher rolling through her head.

What kind of person asks another person for their baby? Go make your own goddamned baby. What do I look like? The baby making machine? He may be a king but I am a duchess and my body is mine and so is my child.

‘Elizabeth heads up!’

The warning was too late and she was midway through turning her head toward the sound when something slammed against the side of her face, the impact hard enough to knock her off balance onto her hands and knees on the sand.

‘Walker!’

‘Elizabeth! Oh my god! Are you okay?’

‘I’m fine,’ she answered, brushing aside Hana’s hands, her ego wounded more than anything. Regaining her footing, she avoided all eye contact under the pretense of brushing the sand from her skin, keenly aware of Drake’s gaze on her.

‘I think I’ve had enough volleyball for one day.’

‘Elizabeth -‘ Maxwell began but she silenced him with a hand.

‘Max just... don’t. I want to be alone. Please.’

-

Steam rose off the bubbling waters of the outdoor jacuzzi as Elizabeth sunk deeper into the tub, trailing a hand through the churning foam, the other against her reddened cheek, her thoughts reflecting the same image.

This is my baby. Our baby — she corrected herself. Mine and Drake’s.

‘I want a little girl with your eyes and my hair.’

‘Not my hair?’

‘Hell Walker, you’re so perfect I’d take an exact copy of you.’

She laughed and they shared a cheesy smile as they both stared out at the waves crashing on the sand. She took another sip from her wine, feeling Drake’s eyes on her.

‘Something’s on your mind.’

‘What? N-no.’

He raised an eyebrow. ‘I may have only been married to you for a month but I know when something’s bothering you Walker. So what is it?’

Elizabeth heaved a big sigh. ‘Its just… We didn’t get a ton of time as a couple before the whole wedding debacle happened. We’re still learning about each other.. And I know we’ve got the rest of our lives to do that…'

‘But?’ Concern leaked into his big brown eyes and she could tell he was trying to hide it so she cleared her throat resolving to just say it once and for all.

‘A baby means a big change. For us. As a couple and as ourselves. And I…’ She faltered.

His hand slipped into hers, squeezing comfortingly.

‘This last year has been amazing, me coming to Cordonia, becoming a duchess, marrying the love of my life, so many things have changed. I could do with some normal before another big change happens and shakes it up again.’

Drake tugged on her hand and she took the opportunity to climb into his lap.

'I only just got you. Is it selfish to want you all to myself for just a little bit longer?’

Elizabeth felt his lips on her head, pressing a gentle kiss there.

’Not at all.’‘I know you’re excited for a baby — I am too but I… I’m just not there yet.’

She buried her face in his chest, worried about what he was going to say next. ‘Its okay Liz. Its okay. We don’t have to jump into this thing head first.’

He hooked a finger under her chin so she’d look at him. ‘When it happens, if it happens, it doesn’t matter. All I care about is us. As long as we’re in this together, I’m down for anything with you Elizabeth.’

As the memory replayed in her head, Elizabeth couldn’t help but feel a sense of betrayal. Did all that mean nothing? Or perhaps Drake simply put more stock in Liam’s opinion than her own?

Now THAT hurt to think of. She was very familiar with the bro code but surely that didn't still apply after freaking marriage?

Why us? That was another puzzle, she couldn’t solve. Why Drake and I specifically? Wouldn’t it make more sense if Liam absolutely HAD to appoint a heir to appoint one from one of the longer standing noble houses? What made her so special?  

For the briefest moment, another thought crossed her mind. Surely he can’t still be in love with me...?

Elizabeth shook her head, perishing the thing from her mind. That door was long closed. If a public wedding wasn’t a big enough sign of rejection, she didn’t know what was. Was there something she was missing here? Something everyone knew about except her? Why did it seem logical to everyone to take someone else’s child and make them heir when you are perfectly capable of making your own?

‘Got room for one more?’

Elizabeth picked her head up to see Hana standing in the doorway, a pair of brightly coloured cocktails in her hands. She shrugged in reply, gesturing to the space beside her, gladly accepting the beverage. The cool liquid soothed her dry throat and she sipped it appreciatively, feeling marginally better.

‘Thanks Hana. You always know what to do to make me feel better.’

The other woman smiled softly. ‘What are best friends for? We missed you’

‘I missed you guys too.’ Elizabeth could not help the corner of her mouth lifting for a moment before it dropped back down, her somber mood settling back in. ‘Are things back home as... turbulent as he says?’

Needing no clarification, Hana’s pretty face crumpled in regret. ‘Truth be told Elizabeth, things are more tense than Liam let’s on. As soon as Anton’s trial was over and you guys left for your honeymoon, we received delegates from our neighbours Monterisso and Auvernal. I’m not sure if Bertrand taught you the history behind those countries.’

When Elizabeth shook her head, her friend continued.

‘Back then both countries were at odds with each other, always fighting, always trying to undermine each other. Cordonia was in the middle. The neutral ground so to speak. So it was only logical that each of them would try to win us over to their side so they’d finally gain the upper hand over each other. Constantine’s reign was the only thing stopping either of them from overwhelming us. And when Liam ascended the throne…'

‘Power newly transferred is the easiest to be taken,’ Elizabeth finished.

Hana nodded. ‘Since Liam doesn’t have an heir or any marriageable prospects really, he looks weak. And as a new king, in the middle of a political battlefield, he looks easy.’

‘But why me Hana?’ she burst out. ‘Why does it have to be us?’ She watched her friend’s pretty face crumple in through for a moment.

‘Because he trusts you and Drake the most. All the other houses, other nobles. Sure they might be happy to give up one of their own for the throne if Liam asked, who knows what agenda they have… I’m not telling you to do anything. Just keep all that in mind okay?’

Hana placed a comforting hand on her leg. ‘I’m going to get out before I turn into a prune,’ she joked, getting to her feet. ‘Bertrand would be horrified if we showed up to dinner in this state. You coming?’

Elizabeth nodded vaguely, turning over the new information in her mind. ‘I’ll be right there.’

-

Dinner was a tense affair. To make things worse, the conversation immediately ceased when Elizabeth took her place at the shared table, next to Bertrand. After a few moments of sporadic mumblings and pushing her food around her plate, she stood up abruptly, making her excuses and leaving, ignoring the gazes of her friends behind her.

The sea wind whipped at her hair, tousling it beyond taming as Elizabeth stared out into the dark horizon, kicking at the sand as she ambled down the beach. Her mind still turned over Hana’s words from that afternoon, now that she’d had time to process it, she was beginning to see the reasoning.  

‘Can I join you?’

She shrugged, not needing to look up to know that it was Drake. ‘There’s nuff beach for the both of us.’

‘How’s your cheek?’

‘Its fine.'

They continued like that for a little while longer, walking two feet apart, both of them silent as she ignored the way his eyes begged her to look at him. Rubbing her arms, Elizabeth shivered slightly as the cold sea air nipped her skin. She turned her head to see Drake already shrugging off his denim shirt, having noticed.

‘I’m fine.’

‘Just take it. You may be mad at me but I’m still not going to let your stubborn ass freeze.’

He stepped closer, his hands were warm when they touched her, settling the fabric over her shoulders protectively. Their faces were inches away and for the first time since that afternoon on the beach, she dared to look up into his dark eyes.

‘Thanks.’

He shook his head in a gesture of dismissal, pausing briefly to gather himself. ‘I’m sorry about earlier.’

‘Me too.’

The crashing of the waves on the beach was all that could be heard for a few moments. ‘Is that really something you wanna subject our kid to?’ She said finally, breaking the silence. ‘Liz…'

‘I’m not mad anymore. I just… I wanna understand where you’re coming from.’  

Drake let out a huge sigh, tipping his head back to the night sky above them. ‘I know its out of character for me.. that I’m the last person who would want this.’

‘No kidding. You’ve spent your entire life hating that place. Two days after we met you were warning me about the nobility and how toxic they were and now...'

‘You’re right,’ Drake admitted, lacing his hands behind his head and staring up into the sky, sighing in defeat. ‘You’re right.’

‘So what changed your mind?’ Elizabeth watched her husband think for a long moment.

‘To be honest,’ he said finally. ‘It was you. You were the one who showed me that a person could go through that place and still be the same honest, down to earth girl I fell in love with. What you’ve done to this country, in the last year, generations of nobles couldn’t achieve in decades. You showed me that there’s more to the nobility than gilded walls and politics.’

Drake’s eyes took on a faraway look now. ‘Yeah when you got that duchess title, I was a little scared that you’d finally be one of them but you’re not. You didn’t let it define you, you used it to make a difference like you did for me, the court… hell, the whole kingdom. So when I thought about how our home needs our help… how my best friend needs our help, I knew that with you by my side, if anyone could raise an heir with a good head on his or her shoulders, it’d be us.’

Elizabeth dropped her head to hide the small smile that broke through. ‘You’re doing it again.’

‘What?’

‘Making me fall in love with you.’ She looked up at him. ‘A little prince or princess raised by two former commoners could do a lot of good around there.'

Drake didn’t say anything as he wrapped his arms around her and she gratefully sunk into his embrace, finally feeling at peace for the first time all day.

'Promise me something.’ Elizabeth spoke up, her voice slightly muffled by his shirt.

‘Anything.'

'From now on,’ she pulled back to look him in the face. ‘We make big decisions like this together. We’re gonna be facing a lot of tough things as duke and duchess and we gotta have each other’s backs. Because if we don’t, who will?’

‘Promise.'

‘I guess we should go talk to Liam now huh?’

‘I guess we should,’ Drake replied, lacing his fingers through hers, preparing to lead them back to the villa before Elizabeth tugged him back to her.

‘Actually wait, I just thought of something.’

-

'Liam I am going to be frank with you,’ Elizabeth towered over where he was sitting on the couch, a menacing look on her face. 'What you asked of us today was a huge overstep of personal boundaries. You may be king but you have no right whatsoever to be so presumptuous especially with such a life changing decision.'

'I am sorry Elizabeth truly I-'

‘Do not interrupt me Your Highness.’ Elizabeth’s tone seared through the room as she fixed him with a fierce stare. ‘You had crossed the line and frankly it is only your best friend’s negotiation skills that saved your ass here.’

She paused, watching his blue eyes widen slightly at her use of the word before she made her demand.

‘Five years.’

Liam’s brow furrowed in confusion. ‘I-'

'I’m giving you five years to find a wife and put a baby in her. Drake and I, we care for this country and we care for you but we have to prioritise our own family first. So in the interest of compromise, we’re giving you until our child is five years old to marry and produce an heir of your own. In that time, Drake and I are fine with our kid being the centre of all the media attention and political nonsense as long as you understand that this arrangement...’

Elizabeth paused to gesture between them. ‘Is temporary. When your wife is pregnant, we will withdraw our child as heir and yours may take its rightful place. Those are my terms.’

Liam rubbed his jaw, eyes flitting from Elizabeth’s determined eyes to the floor as he thought it over for a moment before turning back to her.

‘I accept your terms.’

#this is the only way i can see liz going along with that horrorshow of a plot #and not be like canon mc my uterus is at your command liam #nah this is much more liz #Elizabeth Walker #Elizabeth Richmond #drake walker #drake x mc #drake x elizabeth #king liam #hana lee #maxwell beaumont #the royal heir #the royal romance #choices #choices fanfiction #choices fandom #playchoices #long post

[harryhighkey]

happy valentines day

hi hi i’m back w another one shot!!!!! and this one is holiday themed!!!!!!!!!!! this is my first holiday themed one omg, i’m p happy with how it turned out!!!!! it’s kind of angsty (as usual) but also cute!!!!! idk don’t wanna spoil and also its 3:27am so i need to sleep but hope u all love it and HAPPY VALENTINES DAY

___________________

You were never a valentines day type of person. At one point, you weren’t really sure if anyone really was, or if it was just something people got excited over in movies. Maybe because you hadn’t ever actually been in a relationship properly when the day came around. 

Well, except the one relationship that had ironically ended terribly on what was meant to be the day of love.

Any other time the supposed romantic day came around, you never actually realised. It always took someone else wishing you a happy valentines day to have it even click in your head that February the 14th meant something else to other people. 

That’s why I’ve been eating so much chocolate lately. 

It was always on sale at this time of year, and you couldn’t ignore your favourite sweet snacks sitting right at the check out waiting to be picked up. Conspircary theory videos warned you about this, but you let the supermarket manipulate you anyway.

It wasn’t quite the 14th yet, though. It would be in about twenty minutes, although you were sure someone at the party you were at tonight would announce valentines day at midnight. Someone had made a joke earlier in the night about doing a count down like it was new year’s eve.

On the 13th - or valentines day eve - in the morning, you’d spent your time on a plane. It was one of your closest friends you’d made during your time spent in LA, engagement party. And honestly, you were a little nervous for it at first. The airport had lost your luggage, and you were taking it as a sign it wasn’t going to be a good night.

The people here tonight were also friends with your ex-boyfriend. Harry Styles.

In fact, you probably met a majority of them through him, and you hadn’t seen him since the two of you split up. You made a real effort to have a detox of sorts. You got too caught up in the LA lifestyle, or that’s what you told yourself in a coping mechanism of not accepting you were moving because of him. But when your relationship ended, so did your time in LA you decided. You had even gone as far to switch all your social media’s to private accounts, and in somewhat of a petty notion you blocked Harry so he couldn’t access them.

You had your reasons though, it wasn’t what could be called the smoothest of breakups.

-

“You’ve been gone for months, Harry!” You were furious, he was too. You’d gone to a show with your friends. A show in which you had obtained tickets for months ago. Maybe you had forgotten to tell Harry you wouldn’t be home from work due to heading straight to your friends place to get ready, but how you were to know he was planning a romantic surprise for valentines day. You didn’t even register that it was valentines day, to you, this day had always been when you were going to see Troye Sivan with your friends.

“That’s my fucking job, Y/N!”

“I fucking get that, but you don’t get to come back and get angry at me for having my own life.”

“I’m not,” He stepped closer to you then, and if you didn’t know Harry well enough you would have found it frightening. He could get a little scary when he was this angry, his deep voice boomed with volume and as he came to stand close to you, his tall framed loomed over you and you unconsciously took a step back. “but it’s fucking valentines day.”

“And so fucking what?”

“See, it’s that attitude. I’m so sick of it.”

“Sick of me?”

“No, sick of how you are!”

“That’s the same thing.”

“No, it’s-”

“No, you know what?” You cut him off then. “Fuck you, Harry. Not everything revolves around you. I told you I got these tickets ages ago.”

“You didn’t think to invite me?”

“Obviously not!”

“I could’ve gotten your seats upgraded. Probably even backstage passes.” Usually when he said something like this, he was being genuinely kind. Trying to treat you because he loved you. However now, he was saying it with venom.

“Wow, you’re gonna be like that now? Sorry we’re not all millionaires and as good as Harry fucking Styles.”

“Y/N, no,” His tone shifted then, as did his expression for a second as you saw the quick moment of guilt in his green eyes. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Yeah, you did.”

“No, I didn’t.” And just like that, you two were back on the downhill slope.

“I’m not fucking doing this, I had a really good time with my friends and I come home and you’re just ruining it.”

“You ruined it when you didn’t fucking turn up on valentines day!”

“Fuck valentines day! Who even celebrates that shit?”

“Me, and you’re not appreciate of anything I’ve done for you.”

“Oh my god.” You frustratedly ran your hands through your hair and turned around then, you were both running in a circle but couldn’t ever reach other at this point. “I didn’t even know, Harry. I said I was sorry!”

“You couldn’t reply to a message? Answer my call?”

“No, I was fucking distracted.”

“It’s like you don’t even care I’m home.”

“Of course I care, we’ve been together constantly since you got back. It was one night I didn’t tell you.”

“It’s been more than one night. And tonight was valentines.”

“I have a life. I’m not going to stop seeing my friends because you’re used to having the attention of thousands of girls every night. You’re not on tour anymore, get used to it.”

“Do you know how easily I could have another girl here?”

That was it. That was the moment that did it.

“You know what? Why not bring one of them over? Because I’m done.”

-

You couldn’t lie, you were relieved when you arrived earlier and you totally thought you were seeming subtle in scoping the place to see if Harry was here, but you must not have been because a friend came up and whispered,

“He’s not here, he’s working.”

So eventually you relaxed into the night, easily finding your groove back with the friends you had made when you lived out here. People were beginning to leave at this point, now that it was 11:55pm on the 13th of February, valentines day only a mere five minutes away. And being around your friends made you know that when you went back, you really would miss them so much more. You did miss the life you’d made here. You missed Harry.

Suddenly you felt a little pull in your chest and you couldn’t quite pick it. You knew you were feeling quite nostalgic with your friends and because some people left and you were planning on escaping before it was officially valentines day, you thought it might be that. But it was different. There was the sad farewell made by NASA for Oppy today had made you shed a tear earlier on. But that wasn’t what you were feeling right now, either.

Then you heard someone announce, “Ah, look who made it, after all.”

Fuck.

You knew who it was, you didn’t even have to turn around to look and you wouldn’t. Right now, you were thanking the angel of Oppy that you had chosen the spot you did to not face directly to the front door, instead you faced away from it and towards your friends. A few looked up to see what was going on and a few were looking at you to see your reaction.

You heard his laugh first, it wasn’t his proper laugh, when he found something really funny. It was his polite laugh he did to keep a mood light, to make others around him feel good. “Finished late in the studio, but wanted to stop by and say congratulations.” Harry spoke, and suddenly you wished you were sitting another way just so you could have one small look. The tiniest of glances.

So you did and, fuck, did he look perfect.

You’d made an effort to try and not stay up late lurking online to find out about him. But of course you couldn’t avoid it at all, he still was who he was, after all. Lately, though, he’d been laying really low-key and you weren’t seeing any new news about him. He was smiling as he made small talk, he hadn’t spotted you and you took this as your chance to leave.

Once again, you were thanking Oppy you’d already said your goodbyes as you made a swift exit out the front door. You managed to avoid any interaction with Harry, but by how your body was reacting, you wouldn’t think so.

Your heart was pounding so hard you could hear it loudly in your ear drums. You could barely see your own feet as your walked down the driveway, too focused on how he looked to think about where you were going. Which is exactly why you almost tripped over the letter box. And when you finally unlocked your phone to book an Uber, your hands were shaking.

“Y/N?”

Maybe you hadn’t avoided him.

You took in a deep breath and looked up from your phone and sure enough, there he was. His was longer, a little messier and he had a bit more scruff growing on his face than usual.

“Hey.” Was all you managed to get out.

“Hi.”

You laughed and so did he.

“You look beautiful, Y/N.” You met his vision again, the both you stopped laughing. His compliment caught you off guard, even though maybe you had taken a little extra effort when getting ready for tonight in thinking a scenario where you had a run in with your ex was going to happen.

“Thank you.”

“I-” You both went to speak at once, but quickly stopped when you noticed the other was beginning to talk.

“You go.” You got that in first, letting him have the first turn to speak.

“I was going to say, it’s good to see you...” He admitted. “I missed you.” He continued and you could feel the faintest stinging in your eyes.

Fuck. You didn’t want to cry right now, you’d done your fair share of crying over him. A lot of it. Dropping your head down, you let your hair fall around your face, chewing the inside of your lip as a further attempt to keep the tears from falling.

That’s when you noticed the time displayed on your phone screen.

12:03am.

“It’s valentines day.”

“What?”

“It’s valentines day.” You spoke louder that time.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I tried calling you.”

“I know, I ignored them.” You looked back up at him as you said that, but he was looking to the side. He was uncomfortable, too. “How are you getting home?” You decided a subject change would be good.

“Cars just up the road a little bit.” He answered and looked back to you. “Where are you staying?”

“I don’t know.”

“What?”

“I don’t know.”

“Yes, I heard you, but, Y/N, you don’t know as in you can’t remember the name or you don’t have somewhere to stay.”

“Well, kind of don’t have somewhere to stay.” You admitted, sighing as the warning notification of low battery popped up on your screen. 

“Come hop in my car and put it on charge.” Harry noticed it too.

The two of you walked in silence and you were pleasantly surprised at the scent that filled his car.

“Green apple?”

“Yeah, you really got me hooked on it.” He smiled and so did you. He always had a vanilla scent in here and you could never stand the smell of it. He changed it to your favourite, green apple just for you. “Did you fly in?”

“Yeah.”

“Where’s your suitcase then if you don’t have a place to stay?” He was genuinely concerned but you completely forgotten about the misplacement of your luggage by the airport.

In a response, you groaned and dropped back against the passenger seat with a huff. “The airport fucking lost it.”

“Shit, Y/N.” His hand landed on your thigh then and once it would have been what comforted you, but now your head snapped up as quickly as he snatched his hand back. “Sorry, didn’t mean to- I just-”

“It’s okay.”

“What are you going to do?”

“About what?”

“A place. To stay.”

“Oh, right.” It shouldn’t have been this hard to stay on track with the conversation, but the light speed physical contact really did have your mind whirring. “I was just going to get an Uber and go to the closest hotel or whatever.”

“Do you want to stay with me?” He asked cautiously, and the thought hadn’t even crossed your mind. Once upon a time, you would have just shown up at his front door, but now it was like treading on very thin ice. You didn’t realise you had stayed silent for so long, but it was long enough for him to start talking again. “It’s late anyway, Y/N, at least I’ll know you’re safe.”

“I mean, are you okay with that?”

“Of course I want you to.”

“Okay, thanks.” You clipped your seatbelt in and he nodded at you in reply before starting the car up and driving. “Harry?” You spoke after a few moments of silence.

“Mhm?” He kept his eyes on the road.

“Happy valentines day.” You were smiling, and for a moment he looked over at you, a dimple present in his cheek as he smiled but also shook his head at you.

“Happy valentines day, Y/N.”

#Harry Styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles angst #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x #harry styles x you #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #harry styles concepts #harry styles concept #harry styles drabble #harry styles blurb #harry styles writing #writings #my writing #my writings #happy valentines day