#i've put myself on a couple of apartment waiting lists but that can take years :(( | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ordinaryschmuck · 3 years

Text

Why I (Want to) Love Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure

Salutations random people on the internet who most likely won’t read this. I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

When I heard Disney was making an animated series based on Tangled, acting as a continuation from the original movie, my initial thought was, "Why?"

Sure, Disney is infamous for its unnecessary sequels of the story after happily ever after, with the many, many, many failures that follow suit. Even then, though, most of these continuations were movies that kind of have the potential to tell more of a story. But what more could be said about Tangled? Sorry to spoil a movie that's over ten years old at this point, but by the end of it: Rapunzel lost her golden hair, was reunited with her parents, fell in love, and lived happily ever after. Her losing the golden hair is the most essential part of that list because how can you do a series based on a Disney princess when her most iconic feature is gone? Then I found out that the series forced a way for her hair to come back, and my new initial thought became, "Oh man. This is gonna suck, isn't it?"

Despite the hesitation, I decided to give it a chance anyway. After all, I've been pleasantly surprised before. Things like My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, The Mitchells vs. the Machines, and even The Owl House (yes, really), were shows (and a movie) that I didn't think would be that special. Only to find myself enjoying nearly every minute. So after watching Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure, I can certainly say I was surprised...but it was entirely for the wrong reasons.

And to explain how requires spoilers. So if you haven't checked the series out yet, I highly suggest you do it to form your own opinion. Just keep in mind that it's a bit of a mess, but it can be an enjoyable mess...sometimes...let me explain.

WHAT I LIKED

The Animation/Art Style: The series swapping from 3D to 2D might have been the most brilliant decision anyone could have ever made with this series. Usually, when an animated movie gets turned into a show, the most noticeable downgrade is always the animation. Whether it’s not as detailed or not as fluid, it's always subjective that the movie is better animated than the series. But by switching up the styles, the contrast becomes objective instead. 2D and 3D animation each have their pros and cons, so deciding which one is better is nothing more than a matter of opinion. So by changing the style, Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure avoids getting complaints of being a downgrade from the original movie. It also helps that the art style of the series is really unique.

The best way to describe how the show looks is that it's like a coloring book brought to life. At times, everything looks like it was drawn and colored in with crayons, which sounds like an insult, but in actuality, it's one of the best features of the series. As much as I love most animated shows nowadays, I will admit, they all look a little too similar at times. Then here comes Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure, which tries to incorporate a whole new style that successfully sets it apart from most shows.

As for the animation itself, it's really well-made! It's remarkably expressive when required, while the movements are really fluid during the correct scenes. Sure the fighting can be a little floaty during some action set pieces (yes, those exist here), but the dialogue and comedic moments are really where the series shines with its animation. I may have problems with the series as a whole, but I give credit where credit is due for the perfectly executed effort that I see in every episode in terms of animation.

Rapunzel and Eugene’s relationship: This was not something I was expecting to enjoy from the series. In the movie, Rapunzel and Eugene were fine. They were the typical Disney couple that worked off of each other enough that it was always entertaining, even if it was unbelievable that they fell deeply in love with each other after, like, two days. They weren't bad, but they weren't anything to go crazy over.

But the writers for the series said, "You know what, let's make these two adorable in nearly every scene they're in." And they are!

Even though I don't believe in their relationship in the movie, I fully believe it here. Both characters have a large amount of faith in one another on top of having endless love for their partner. Like how Eugene knew Rapunzel would be fine when taking out an airship or how Rapunzel couldn't bring herself to say a bad thing about Eugene when making Cassandra a sparring dummy of him. It's legitimately pleasant to watch, to the point where I put Rapunzel and Eugene in my top ten list of favorite fictional couples. They're that good to me, and it's one of the reasons why I don't jump on the bandwagon of shipping the two main female characters together. I'm all for LGBTQA+ representation, but give Cassandra her own girlfriend. Rapunzel's taken, and most of my enjoyment of this show comes from her and her man. So, you know, keep things as they are.

Cassandra (Seasons One and Two): Seeing how I've already mentioned her, let's talk about Cassandra, shall we? Because when making a series based on a movie that had only four prominent characters, with two of them being comedic animal sidekicks, you're going to need to introduce more members to the main cast to write more potential stories. And Cassandra, in Seasons One and Two (I'll get to Season Three), is a worthy addition. She acts as a strict straight man (I know the irony) who interacts well with Rapunzel and clashes perfectly with Eugene on occasion. She was passably entertaining in Season One and developed amazingly in Season Two. Her growing frustrations with Rapunzel's actions lead to a slow build-up that made her betrayal heartbreaking but somewhat understandable. And as for the results in that betrayal...yeah, I'll get into that later. For now, I'll just say that Cassandra was a pleasant addition to the main cast, especially when she was a part of the main trio, and she's yet another good surprise that the writers supplied for the series.

The Songs: The songs are...not going to be for everyone. Most of them are passable yet kind of generic, while others sound like they belong on Disney Junior (Looking at you, "Bigger Than That"). But when Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure makes a hit, MAN, it is a home run. Numbers like "Ready As I'll Ever Be" and "Nothing Left to Lose" are sung phenomenally, orchestrated well, and are songs I can listen to on repeat multiple times. And "Waiting in the Wings" is not only something I consider to be the best song in the series, but it's also something I'd place as high up on Disney's best due to how f**king incredible it is. "Waiting in the Wings" is a powerful ballad that manages to be both tragic yet inspiring on top of how well it sums up Cassandra as a character. The writers may not always be on top of their game when it comes to music, but songs like these prove that they know how to earn that Disney name.

And that’s all I have for the likes...Oh boy. That’s not a good thing is it?

WHAT I DISLIKED

It Peaked at Season One: It did. It really did.

Season One felt like the writers had a grip on what type of show they wanted: A slice-of-life series with Rapunzel dealing with the issues of her kingdom with a meager threat of these black rocks growing in the background. It was all cute and well-balanced for the most part, but that all disappears in Season Two. Because now it's sort of about this adventure, but because Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure set itself as a slice-of-life series, there need to be these small-scale stories that intertwine the grand narrative being told. The issue is that the story comes to a grinding halt one too many times as fans are forced to sit through these filler episodes that, while not all of them are bad, still feel like a distraction. And by Season Three, the series does feel more focused while having some slice-of-life episodes added to the ongoing story instead of distracting us from it. But the writing isn't as strong, there are several plot holes in the narrative (how did Rapunzel's sunstone get into her dress?), and there is way too much time going back and forth on Cassandra's morality. They claim that she's a villain while arguing that there might still be some good in her, and they continue this train of thought for nine episodes when it really could have been settled in two. For me, it's a bad sign for a series when the first season is the best one. Because if it's all downhill from there, what's the point of even watching?

It Tries to be Epic: This might have been the worst decision the writers could have made.

Now, here's the thing: I don't mind grand epic tales of adventure and battles against demons. If anything, I'm all for them...when it's appropriate and fits with the tone of the series.

Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure suffers a similar problem Frozen II has, in which the writers felt like a big, life-threatening adventure was the perfect continuation of a meager, personal story about the relationships of characters. It isn't. If anything, it's completely missing the mark about what the original story was about. And sure, sometimes writers can succeed in telling personal stories through grand adventures. Just look at The Owl House and parts of Amphibia. But with those shows, it's established within the first few episodes that action and peril will be a series staple. With Tangled, while there was some action and peril, it's all very subdued compared to how high the stakes got raised in later episodes in the show. Especially in the series finale.

And, I mean, c'mon. You're making Rapunzel an action hero?

Judy Hopps? Yes.

Moana? Maybe.

Raya? Most definitely.

But Rapunzel? The character who’s all about optimism and seeing the best of others. That's the character you're going to morph into a hero that fights against an evil demon laid dormant for years? Did you even watch the original movie? Yeah, sorry, but I just don't buy it.

If you want to tell an epic story that gets the blood pumping for fans addicted to adventure, go for it! See where the wind takes you. But make sure to set that tone as early as possible while also making sure that it fits with the characters. If not, the end result is a series that feels like it's trying to be something it’s not.

Eugene is Kind of an Idiot at Times: It should be noted that Movie-Eugene and Series-Eugene are practically two different characters. In the film, Eugene was more or less the straight man, as he often questions the wackiness in the world around him and keeping Rapunzel grounded in reality. For the series, most of that personality got transferred to Cassandra. Thus making Eugene's new role in the series act as the egotistical imbecile. Sure, he had those moments in the film, but not as frequently, and it really pains me when the writers really lean hard into a minor aspect of his personality. Sometimes there are moments when Eugene acts like his original self. But it's all small scenes that are spread apart with entire episodes where he has half a brain cell. I'm sure some people didn't mind this change to the character, but as someone who adores the movie version of Eugene, I can't help but feel disappointed.

The Villains are the Worst: Now, I don't mean the one-off villains that show up, cause some chaos for a bit, and disappear at the end of the episode. Those are characters with fun personalities, occasionally cool designs, and do their job as villains of the week. It doesn't matter if their motivations are laughably simple, as their purpose is to be enjoyable characters above anything else. So I actually enjoy those villains...it's the ones that act as season-long antagonists that really grind my gears.

The purpose behind these types of foes is to build up how evil they are throughout the season. The issue is that the writers try to give these characters, or at least two of them, a point. To be fair, this can work. Just look at Killmonger from Black Panther and sometimes Karli Morgenthau from The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. You understand and probably even sympathize with the logic and reasoning these characters have. It's just that their actions couldn't be farther from what you would do. The problem with Varian and Cassandra is that they have the motivation, but it's not written suitably for the story.

Cassandra is a whole can of worms I'll get to in a minute, but Varian is someone I can easily discuss for a brief time. Because while I can comprehend his pain for having his father frozen in yellow rock, I don't think turning evil is the best decision to go with that character. Because A. Everything is his fault. He blames Rapunzel for not helping him, but even if she didn't have a crisis to deal with, there was nothing she could have done to stop it. His frustrations are not only unjustified, but given the fact that this wouldn't have happened if he listened to his father in the first place, it feels like him becoming evil is too drastic of a turn. And B. Varian worked much better as a supporting character rather than a primary antagonist. He was just this hopeful, if not a clumsy scientist who wanted to prove himself, who causes minor catastrophes due to not thinking ahead. Turning a character like Varian into a villain is a bit of a misstep because if the guy acts hilariously incompetent as a good guy, it makes little sense to have him be intelligent and ten steps ahead of Rapunzel when being evil. If he were to become more serious and careful when helping the rest of the main cast, I'd consider that character progression done properly. But becoming a villain is just an overreaction.

However, none of that compares with my issues with the main antagonist of the series: Zhan Tiri. This goes back to my problems with the series making itself too epic. Because if Zhan Tiri existed in any other show, I probably wouldn't have any problem with her. She's built up well throughout all three seasons and is kind of threatening at times. But she doesn't belong in a series based on a movie that dealt with a small, personal issue where it wasn't even the character who killed the villain in the end. It was her love interest and animal sidekick. Even if Zhan Tiri works well as a character, the fact that it doesn't feel like she belongs in the show makes her too distracting to enjoy. And that's why these villains suck. If not poorly written, they don't belong in a series that should focus on small-scale issues. And if you can functionally write an antagonist that appears for only one episode but flounder with ones that show up in several, well, that's just embarrassing.

Cassandra (Season 3): OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH BOY, do I have some words to express with this character. Like with Movie-Eugene and Series-Eugene, Cassandra from Seasons One and Two is frustratingly different from the psychotic IDIOT from Season Three. Basically, just take the issues I have with Varian, multiply them by ten, add them with some bafflingly stupid decisions, and you still wouldn't get how much Season Three-Cassandra frustrates me!

First off, her motivation...what the f**k were the writers thinking? The big reason why Cassandra betrays Rapunzel and motivates all of her misdeeds was that Cassandra's mother was Mother Gothal...EXPLAIN THAT LOGIC TO ME?! Because Cassandra should know what type of woman Mother Gothal was. She should know what Mother Gothal did to Rapunzel in the first eighteen years of her life. So how is Cassandra being abandoned by Gothal the central motivator to cut ties with Rapunzel, who is probably an even bigger victim in this scenario!? Seriously, Rapunzel was cut off from the rest of the world and treated as an unknowing prisoner because she was beneficial to Gothal. Cassandra was adopted into a household with mutual love and got to actually live her life. In no way does it make sense for her to be angry at Rapunzel.

Nor does it make sense that the writers try to play it off as a good thing in the song "Crossing the Line!" Sure, it sounds nice, but thematically, it gives across the opposite feelings that the audience should have. Because if Cassandra cutting ties with Rapunzel is meant to be tragic and awful, why is the music suggesting it's the best possible thing that's ever happened for the character? If you like the song, fine, but even you have to admit that it's thematic nonsense.

But, sure. Cassandra's evil now, and she considers it a good thing. Whatever. I'll take it as long as it leads to good stories...but here's the thing: In the penultimate episode before the three-part series finale, Cassandra asks a question. A question I would have never expected her to ask, despite everything that has happened in the last season. A question that was so baffling, I had to legitimately pause the episode to process the fact that she asked something so stupid. Because Cassandra, the character who is intelligent and grounded in reality, asked, "Am I the bad guy?"

I was honestly shocked to find out she was shocked! How, in the flying, everlasting, cock-a-doodle-doodling F**K does a person like her not pick up that maybe, just maybe, she isn't the hero in this story!? Call me crazy, but endangering the lives of people you once called friends and family, dressing in black, AND HAVING A GIANT EVIL-LOOKING TOWER MADE OUT OF F**KING SPIKES aren't qualities I would give to a hero!

If Cassandra was like Thanos, a character so wrapped up in his ego that he can't even notice how evil he is, I would understand. But she doesn't have an ego. Anger, yes. But for the most part, her personality is based on having logic and reasoning. So turning her into a villain and having her unaware that she's a villain is an act of lunacy that I am incapable of understanding. I don't know who's idea this was, but whoever is to blame...you've got issues.

>Sighs<...This series isn't good, is it?

IN CONCLUSION

I like the animation and some of the characters...but that's not enough. Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure is a mess of a show that tries to do too much for a story that should have so little. Meaning that it's a D+ for me. I want to enjoy it and give it a higher grade, especially with how much I hear people praise this series. And if you do enjoy it, all the power to you. Your opinions are valid, even if I highly disagree with them. Because for me, this is a show that I won't get myself tangled up in again in the future.

#tangled: the series #rapunzel's tangled adventure #rapunzel x eugene #tangled cassandra #tangled varian #zhan tiri #what i thought about

32 notes · View notes

softsebnbuckystan · 3 years

Text

Soul ties - Part 13/Finale (Bucky Barnes au)

“I've hungered for your touch

A long, lonely time”

Soul ties playlist : https://open.spotify.com/playlist/054hHxpYJ2rIluevfSaGRK?si=w1JkdfFwTjuXZMegQd9WHw

Waking up from your first night with Bucky was a feeling you would make sure you'd never forget. You knew he didn't get much sleep : you'd only been to his room once, but you'd noticed the single blanket on the floor, which somehow reminded you of Steve's bed in the early years of your friendship.

"You didn't even move," you said as you woke up with his arm around you. "I feel bad I kept you in an uncomfortable position."

"Don't. I couldn't wake you up for anything in the world," he joked. "Even when you snored."

"Lord, take me out of this misery," you complained as you got up from your bed, escaping Bucky's embrace. "You were joking, right?"

He grinned and shook his head no. Damn. You ran your brush through your hair and picked up your phone on your way to the bathroom to brush your teeth. Checking your messages, you noticed a text from Steve.

"Tony dropped off some papers for you. Didn't want to wake you guys up."

Your heart jumped as you realised what papers Steve was talking about. Divorce papers. You rinsed your mouth, put on some jeans and a T-shirt before telling Bucky about the special delivery.

"All I have to do is sign them, then drop them off at Darren's," you explained. "Best case scenario : he signs them right away and I get to go back with them."

Bucky was already seated and he was getting ready to go change as well. "And worst case scenario would be...?"

"He doesn't sign them at all, and I have to go through the court system," – you sighed – "which I really don't want to."

"It's not gonna happen," he assured you. "I'm coming with you to make sure of it."

"You don't have to do that, you know?"

"I want to."

You slowly sat on his lap, wrapping your hands around his neck. "I'm a really lucky woman." You couldn't help but smile before kissing him quickly. "Okay. I gotta go read and sign those papers. If you want to make some coffee while I do so..."

"Oh, I see, already taking advantage of my soft spot for you," he said. "I didn't think-"

"So you have a soft spot for me, huh?" you teased, a nervous laugh escaping your mouth.

"Did I say that?"

"Maybe. I guess we're even, then. Soft spots for each other sounds good."

You got up and put on your shoes.

"It does," he agreed. "Alright, I gotta make some coffee now."

---

"I didn't think I'd see you this soon."

"Well, I'm full of surprises," you snapped at your future ex-husband as you handed him a small stack of paper. "I need you to sign this."

Darren's eyes kept going from you and Bucky to the papers. He grabbed the divorce agreement hesitantly and read the title.

"What if I don't?"

"You will."

Bucky's low and stern voice had unsettled your interlocutor so bad he opened his mouth without saying anything.

"If you don't mind, we'll come in and make sure you sign these," you said as you made your way through the hallway of the building. "I also have some stuff I want back."

"Fine," Darren agreed grudgingly. "It's not like I have a choice anyway. I don't want your new pet boyfriend to attack me."

"He's not-"

"Let him," Bucky told you. "Please, let him give me an easy excuse to do it."

You held back a laugh : you knew Bucky didn't want to be involved in a meaningless fight. On the other hand, letting Darren believe this was a possibility seemed like a fun taste of payback.

"C'mon, Buck. He's not worth the trouble."

You grabbed his hand as you preceded Darren in the staircase that led to your former apartment. You took him to the bedroom you and Darren once shared ; you could see his face changing at the sight of the bed and decoration that still bore your mark.

"Are you okay?" you asked.

"Sure."

You got away from the wardrobe you were about to open and walked up to him.

"No you're not. Talk to me," you said as you stroked his cheek.

"This room is filled with memories," he whispered. "Memories that are his."

"And that's all he's got," you retorted. "Memories. That's the only thing he can cling to from now on, assuming that even means something to him."

"But it means something to you, and I don't want you to erase all that," he confessed.

"Bucky... I'm not erasing anything," you promised, knowing how hard it was for him to think he was stripping someone from their memories. "Life is about learning. If I hadn't been married to him in the first place, I probably wouldn't have met you. See? Learning from past experiences is not erasing said experiences. I know you're feeling like the bad guy here, but you're not."

"He looks miserable. That's kinda my fault."

"You didn't let me blame myself for this, and I'm sure as hell not gonna let you blame yourself either."

You smiled and kissed him on the cheek before going back to the wardrobe. Grabbing a bag and filling it with your remaining clothes didn't feel as heavy as it did when you'd last been here. Your chest felt ten times lighter, and you were convinced Bucky's presence had something to do with it.

"I'm good," you said. "Those are the only things I couldn't bring last time."

You left the bedroom and found Darren sitting at the kitchen table, his pen hovering over the divorce agreement.

"Could you get done with this already?" you asked softly. "I'm kind of in a hurry."

"You're so eager to leave me, aren't you?" Darren scoffed. "I thought..."

"What?"

"I thought you could make this work for us."

You let out a long, disappointed sight. "The very fact you think it's my job and mine only to make this marriage work is another sign of why it didn't," you pointed out. "I shouldn't have lied to you about my tattoo in the first place," you admitted, "but the way you treated me all those years was far from right."

"But I was good to you."

"No, you weren't."

Darren lowered his eyes and signed the final page. With a single hand, he slid the agreement towards you.

"Thank you," you told him. "I'm glad we could end this the nice way."

"It's really over, huh? You're just gonna leave with a guy you've known for a couple of months."

For once, there was no animosity in his voice. He sounded resigned more than he sounded sad.

"Yes. I might not have known Bucky for long, but he treated me the way I know I deserve. I'm not sorry you couldn't be that person, because there is someone out there waiting to meet you as well."

"Yeah, maybe."

You picked up the papers and went for the door, Bucky following you.

"Goodbye, Darren."

You didn't get an answer, as you'd expected. You went down the stairs silently and dropped your bag on the backseat of the car before sitting behind the wheel. Bucky sat in the passenger's seat, unsure of what he should say.

"Thanks for coming along," you ended up saying. "I think it helped me stay calm."

Bucky squeezed your knee gently as you started the engine : his hand didn't leave your leg for the rest of the trip, and you'd never been more thankful for automatic cars.

---

"Surprise," Natasha told you as she greeted you with a glass of champagne. "Steve told me the news."

"What is it we're celebrating, exactly?" you asked with a chuckle.

"Your divorce, of course! I couldn't make it to the wedding, might as well celebrate its ending."

"I'm-, oh god." Keeping things serious was impossible and the light-hearted feeling in your chest resurfaced. You thought you'd feel more guilt over divorcing Darren, but you knew now that it was the best thing to do.

Bucky laid a hand on your waist even though there were a few people around, and Nat handed him a glass as well. Wanda, Steve and Sam ended up drinking with you, and even Tony made an appearance. Laughing, talking and chilling with your family felt like an enormous relief after the past few weeks. Despite your surroundings, Bucky's hand couldn't seem to leave your body : your shoulder, thigh or arm or even your back... Maybe you weren't the only one who felt freed by signing those papers. You stayed up late that night, and Natasha was the last one to leave.

"Big day, huh?"

You nodded and snuggled up to Bucky on the couch. "About what you said earlier-"

"It's okay," he said. "I just...you have memories with him. I cannot pretend they don't exist, and-"

"Don't. They're not relevant," you said, cutting him off before cupping his face. "It's you and me now, Buck. Every moment in my life, every choice I ever made led me to you. So yeah, Darren and I share memories. Some of them are good. Some aren't. So what? You and I will make new ones, and that's what matters to me."

You pressed your forehead against his and closed your eyes.

"I'm in love with you," you confessed. "I'm in love with you and I've never felt it this strong, ever, and it's scary but it's also the most exciting thing-"

His lips crashing on yours interrupted your whole speech. His hand found the skin on your waist as he laid you down on the couch and kissed you with passion, enjoying the fact that the room was all yours. He pulled back, leaving you out of breath. He got up abruptly and extended his hand, grabbing yours and putting you back on your feet. Pulling you into a tight hug, he kissed your cheek and your neck.

"I love you," he whispered in your ear.

"I love you too," you said. You grabbed his hand on your waist and led him through the compound. You stopped in front of his bedroom and stood on tiptoe to plant a kiss on his nose. "Let's go make new memories now."

the end.

---

this is officially it guys, soul ties is a finished story! sorry the finale took so long to be posted but i've barely had time for myself with exams coming soon. i hope this story made its way to your heart like it did mine. :)

tag list : @ginger-swag-rapunzel @joscelyn02 @writehistorynotthegrocerylist @bluemoon-icecream @lady-loki-ren @simplybombshell @lizajane3 @livingonkpop @kaitieskidmore1

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x y/n #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan imagine #bucky x reader #james bucky barnes #tfatws #catws #the falcon and the winter soldier #captain america #self insert #x you #x y/n #fluff #soulmates

29 notes · View notes

lilacsandwhiskey · 3 years

Text

*all pics belong to original owners

*characters belong to Pixelberry

Chapter 5 - Lobster

Pairings: Drake Walker x Riley Brooks (The Royal Romance)

A/N: hello my beautiful friends! I’m super late with posting. When I originally planned on posting, something came up (I got over fear and went and got my nose pierced lolol help) and the chapter never made it. HERE WE ARE THOUGH! Reminder: I’m still taking all kinds of requests, just send them my way:) Much love!!!

Tag list: @marshmallowsaremyfavorite @lovingchoices14 @gkittylove99 @darley1101 @kingliam2019 @tinkie1973 @whiskeyslullabye

Warnings: Maybe language, a little cheesy ngl

*Riley's POV*

A couple of weeks had gone by, and Drake coming over had become a ritual. Except for tonight - he actually invited me over. He hadn't invited me over, always claiming that his apartment wasn't finished, and that he wanted to wait for me to see the final product. I would always shake my head, telling him I didn't care, but he never gave in.

Drake: No need to pick up dinner tonight - I'll cook

Riley: i get to come see your place AND you're cooking... should I be afraid?

Drake: Maybe, Brooks

Spending time with Drake was nice - it was always simple, and I was starting to feel like I could be myself around him. The man I'd met a year ago, that looked like he hated my guts, had now started laughing at my jokes and telling me stories after I pried them out of him.

I knocked on his door with a bottle of whiskey. Drake answered the door with a dish towel thrown over his shoulder. He was wearing his denim shirt buttoned up with black jeans. He gave me a smile before I walked in. "I've brought the goods." I raised the bottle up. "You win, Brooks."

"You have such a nice place, Drake! You were keeping me from it all this time." I took in the dark leather couch in the living room space. He had a minimalist walnut coffee table sitting in front of it with black coasters. His television was mounted on his wall, just like mine was. He had a small black table for two in the kitchen, decorated with his very own place mats. Everything had it's own spot. I loved it.

"It hasn't looked like this for long." Drake was in the kitchen at the stove. I walked up behind him. "And... this smells delicious. How many other secrets are you keeping from me?" "I guess you'll have to just keep coming around to find out." Drake gave me a smirk before turning off the stove. "Can I help set out anything?" "Nope, you're my guest tonight, remember?" I took a seat at the set table, where Drake had started to lay out a gray china set with glasses of water and silverware. "You're more put together than I am, Drake Walker." He just shook his head as he walked over, placing pasta on my plate, then his.

Placing the pot back on the stove, he sat across from me and gave me a smile. "Thank you for dinner, Drake." "I hope you enjoy." Drake took a bite of his food. We ate with small, comfortable talk. I told him about my day at work, about how my dad had called earlier and told me about his new lady friend. Drake asked me how I felt about my dad having a girlfriend. I sighed, trying to gather my words. "I would never be upset at him, he deserves all the happiness. He's dealt with a lot of shit. He dealt with my mom being sick, my brother, hell, even me. I know I wasn't always the easiest to raise, though he'd disagree with that. No one will ever replace my mom, but if this woman makes my dad happy, then I'm okay with it. I can't expect him to live alone forever. No one really wants to be alone, do they?"

Drake nodded as I talked. When I said that no one really wanted to be alone, Drake changed the look on his face, to look as if he was saying, "wellll, not everyone." I looked at him questioning. "What?" He asked. "Do you enjoy being alone?" Drake laughed and sat back. "I'm not saying that I enjoy it, but I do think I'm content." "I guess I'm content too, I just, maybe I romanticize the whole growing together with someone, finding someone that you can just always lean on. Not even just a relationship, I guess, but friendship too. I believe we all have a soulmate, even if it is a friend." Drake looked at me as I talk, taking another bite. "I see what you're saying. I think I've just always lived my life to believe that I was better off alone. I had my best friend, of course, but you know with Liam's situation, I didn't always have him, but he always had me." I knew he meant that in a good way, because I could tell he understood that Liam couldn't always just drop everything and be there.

I felt sad that Drake never felt that he truly had anyone. I didn't know too much about his family, because he never wanted to talk about it. I knew that his dad had passed away when he was younger, and that he lived in the palace. He never told me much more than that about his family. I didn't know about his mom, I didn't even know if he had siblings. And now I was starting to realize, that I did a lot of the talking.

As badly as i wanted to ask, I assumed that he would just tell me when he wanted to. I was more open that he was, and if he wanted me to know, he would. "So, what's the true occasion? Why the fancy dinner and finally letting me over?" I shimmied my shoulders as I took a sip of water. "It's not that special." Drake shrugged, trying to hide his smile with a drink of his water. "It's got Drake Walker smiling, I need to know." He sat his glass down, I followed.

"Fine, I got a job." "Drake, what? This is so exciting! Can I hug you?" I stood up, Drake followed, opening his arms. I took him into an embrace, an embrace I had never felt before. He was strong, but gentle. Comfortable and protecting. His scent was subtly woodsy and warm. I had almost forgotten this was a celebratory hug, and not just a moment for me to drink more of Drake Walker in. I finally pulled back, recognizing that I probably lingered for just a moment too long. "Where at?" "You know that high-end bar, Henderson's?" "Yes!" "I got a job bartending there." "That is awesome, Drake. I'm so excited for you! When do you start?" "Next Tuesday. I'll have training on Monday."

Taking the moment in, we sat back down. "Have you told anyone else?" I asked, attempting to pry into a little bit more knowledge about him. "No one yet, I'll probably call Liam and Savannah later." "Savannah?" I asked, wondering who Savannah may be. A best friend? A girlfriend that wasn't mentioned? A cousin? "Oh yeah, my sister! I forgot I hadn't told you about her. She's my younger sister." "That's awesome!" "I think you'd really like her. Maybe you could meet her sometime." Why did I feel my heart jump at that? Stop it, Riley.

After dinner, I went to clean up, in which Drake put a stop to that real quick. "Have you not learned my rules yet, Brooks?" "Not quite." "I'm just going to have to keep reminding you. Go sit down, I'll pour us a drink." He urged me to the couch. I sat down, crossing my legs and leaning back into the throw pillow behind me.

Drake came over, handing me a glass of whiskey as he sat down next to me with his very own. "Wait, wait, before you drink." I stopped him. "Cheers to your new beginnings." I sat, holding my glass out. "You really enjoy raising toasts, huh?" "Maybe I just enjoy celebrating people." I grinned. "Cheers." Drake held his glass out to meet mine before we both took a drink.

"You've finally gotten around to watching some television, huh?" I asked, as he clicked on his Netflix account. Before he could scroll, his Continue Watching popped up. "FRIENDS?" I asked excitedly. "Damn it, it was going to be a surprise! I was going to tell you I watched it after I finished." "I'm moved, Drake! You actually remembered." I clutched my heart dramatically. "Of course I did. Do you want to watch it? I'm only on season two." "Yes, nothing would make me happier."

Drake turned on season two, episode fourteen of Friends. I recognized the episode as soon as it started, to be the one where Rachel watches the video of their prom night, and how Ross stepped up to take Rachel to prom. "I love this episode so much." Drake looked over at me with a smile. "I have to say, I'm enjoying the show quite a bit." Drake raised his arm up, lazily throwing it over the back of the couch, just barely around me. Drake was leaned back into the side of the couch, and I was now kicking myself mentally for sitting so far away. And now, I was kicking myself for even thinking he was trying to make a move. As much as I tried not to find myself attracted to Drake to keep a friendship going, it was impossible.

The way he looked at me, the way he rolled his eyes and laughed right after. The way that he laughed at my jokes when I could tell how hard he tried not to. The way he listened to everything I had to say. The way he cared about things and would text me on the late nights I had to work and wasn't able to see him, to make sure that I made it back to my place safely. All the little things and all the moments.

"I need to use the bathroom." I said. "Sure, right there." I felt like I was back in high school, plotting a way to get a guy's attention, because that was exactly what I was doing. I walked into the bathroom, staring at myself in the mirror. "Get yourself together, Riley. What the hell are you doing?" I whispered. I flipped my hair in front of my shoulders. My makeup was still as plain as every other day. I waited a few more moments before I walked back out, recognizing that he would probably wonder why I was in and out so fast.

Finally, I walked back out. Instead of sitting on the other side of the couch, I edged to the middle closer to Drake. Drake's arm was still sitting lazily across the back of the couch. I attempted to keep my eyes on the screen, until I felt Drake's arm finally fall from the back to my shoulders. I fell comfortably into his side, praying he couldn't hear my heart beating through my chest.

Interrupting my moments, Drake started laughing. "What if I grew my hair out like Ross's in this episode?" "I can't tell if I would love it or hate it. I think you should give it a try. Get a perm and everything." Drake's arm tightened around me throughout the rest of the episode. I felt myself getting very comfortable and deepening my body under his arm. I felt my eyes fluttering, in which Drake kept looking down to make sure I was awake.

My favorite part of the episode was coming up. Rachel finally walked over to Ross and kissed him. "See, he's her lobster!" I grinned as I sat up. "See, everyone has their lobster, Drake!" He just shook his head as he sat up with me. "I think it's about time for me to head back over. I don't think it'd be too great if I fell asleep here, you wouldn't be able to wake me. I sleep like a rock." "That's okay, it is pretty late, huh?" I stood with Drake following me to the door.

"Thank you for dinner and sharing your news with me." I gave him a smile, before he pulled me into our now second hug ever. "Of course. Thanks for celebrating with me." "Oh shoot, speaking of celebrating. I know it's a short notice, but Saturday night, Daniel is throwing me a birthday party. I'd love for you to join in. I understand if not, but I'd love to see you there. I can text you the deets." "Hmmm, I'll have to think about that one, Brooks. Will there be whiskey?" "That seems to be all you care about, but if that's what will ensure your attendance, then yes, there will be whiskey." I smiled as I opened the door. "I'll see if my calendar is clear." "Goodnight, Drake." "Goodnight, Brooks."

#drake walker #drake x mc #the royal romance #trr fandom #trr fanfic #choices trr #drake walker x mc #fanfic

27 notes · View notes

xxisxxisxxis · 3 years

Text

Gateway Drug | Part Eighty-Five [PT. 1]

Part Eighty-Five [PT. 2]

Words: 5.5k

Warning(s): explicit language, explicit sexual situations, mentions of drug abuse

Tag List: @unknownoblivion @edwardtriggerhandzz @haileynicoleseavey17 @cierrasixx19 @oskea93 @mgkobsessed @sharon6713 @itsametaphorbriansblog @miriampraez @allie-mcginn @xpoisonousrosesx @rebeccaphillips14 @nicholeh7 @lilmou5ie @emariehorror @divaanya @6ixx6ixx @ratedrkohardychick91 @floregrohlssard @oldschoolimagineblog @thanks2pete @abaldboi @liith-ium @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels @ytwahsog @scarecrowmax @random-internet-user-4471 @solohqrry @sparxx27 @kaitieskidmore1 @cruecifymesixx @meetthesixxter @sublimeprincesswasteland @arianareirg @gingerspicetalks

@fancywasmyname1 @teller258316 @ggorehorror @blowinmeupwithherlove @xrosegoldwolfx @mylifeisjustafeverdream @redlipscrystalskies14 @str4nge-haze @reigns420 @sixxseconds2love @leatherandheels @dogmom2014 @allyouneedislove-mp3 @n0-self-c0ntro1 @viinceneil

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

NIKKI

My lawyer looks completely unimpressed with my lack of shoes, shirt, and dignity as he leans back in his chair behind his desk, rubbing his temples.

"It doesn't work like that, Nikki, I'm afraid." He informs me finally, sitting up and leaning forward to rest his elbows on his desk.

"I was declared dead for two minutes. I died. My wife's technically a widow."

"You can't annul a four year marriage on the basis of 'I died for two minutes.' Some cases of actual death, it can take an act of congress for widow or widower to have an annulment for a marriage where their spouse is no longer alive, legitimately." He explains and I roll my eyes.

"So, what, I just get some divorce papers or something?"

"Unless I declare mental incapacity given that you went through a traumatic series of events within the last twenty-four hours and this could possibly be a very serious lapse in judgement." He argues and I stare at him.

"Stop pulling my dick."

"I'm not 'pulling your dick.' I just don't want you to make this decision and then regret it when your head clears."

I managed to wear him down and by the next morning, he left the papers by Tommy's door after Vince mentioned to me that Viv stayed over there with Tommy and Heather.

When I get home, Karen opens the door and looks at me, wide eyed and confused.

"H-Hey?" She says as I push past her and go to the phone, opting to change my answering machine.

"Hey, it's Nikki." I say. "I'm not here because I'm dead."

Karen just looks at me, astounded, and I go to my room, slamming the door.

I was good and tired and glutton for punishment because I got home that night and loaded up the biggest shot of smack I could muster and pulled the trigger.

I wake up with a sharp pain in the crook of my arm, a needle still in my skin as blood trails my forearm to collect in my palm...Jesus fucking Christ, I've officially lost it.

I take the needle out and force myself up to trudge to the living room to check my messages.

Things like, "You're an asshole," and "that's not funny," tend to be the common theme.

I guess I need to change my answering machine.

I comb through to see if I have anything from Viv.

Now would be a good time to hear her bitch me out for almost making her kill herself--because, lets face it, she's gonna blame it on me, anyway.

Nothing's found, though.

"Fuck, Vivian." I sigh out, sitting on the carpet in the living room, rubbing my forehead as a new message comes on…

"You fucker, you would be the one to fucking OD and die and then get up right after and file for divorce as if she doesn't have enough shit going on, already."

I furrow my brows at the voice.

"Axl the Twat?" I say aloud, confused, as he finishes with, "fuck you, you fucking fuck."

He hangs up and I raise my brows.

Did I die and wake up in a parallel universe? Axl defending Vivian?

Is this hell?

It cuts to the last message.

"Hey, umm...I don't know if you'll get this or not or if…" Vanity. "...I don't know what's going on but I heard something terrible on the radio and I suppose it was true--well, kind of, um…" she sighs. "We're not together anymore and I get that I just hope you're o--"

"Fuck that." I grumble, hitting delete.

I fall back and I look up at myself.

It's fucked that I bought this fucking house for Viv, and she's not even staying in it anymore.

I feel like I promised her so much and haven't given a damn thing to her except reasons to want to throw herself off of balconies.

I look down at my arm, dried blood still on my skin.

I'm fucking tired of this shit.

I let my complete exhaustion of being sick fuel me to dig through everything I own and throw out all of my rigs, any other drugs in my path, and even pour everything to get drunk off of down the sink--even the fucking cooking-wine.

Vivian's somewhere catching the holy spirit, probably, just sensing I'm finally fucking done.

Or she's somewhere in tears over me finally taking the final step to end our relationship.

I feel like it's dead in every way aside from legal.

Whisky's laying by the door, whining when I step over him to go throw the big garbage bag out.

I'd get down there and whine for her, too, but I know this is what needs to be done.

Our entire relationship has just been one giant clusterfuck, and I don't want to put her through the bullshit of having to try to forgive me and trust me, again.

I think I've already stolen enough of her peace of mind.

She'll be happier with Duff, anyway. He's a good guy. A hell of a lot more suited for her than I am.

My hand rubs the back of my neck and I realize I'm still wearing the small crucifix of her's.

I'm tempted not to give it back.

I just sigh and throw the trash out and get back in the house, getting in the shower.

When I get out, I ruffle a towel through my hair, seeing the light blinking on my answering machine.

I go over and try to keep myself from getting too excited at the thought of it being Viv before I hit play on my messages.

"Nikki, it's Doc. I know you feel like horseshit right about now but I need you to come down to the office at 5:00p.m., we're getting you guys together because we need to talk. See you then--preferebly kinda sober and coherent."

Turns out I'll have my ass chewed by Doc before Viv, after all.

I know he came down to the hospital and tore Slash and the guys new ones while I was unconscious.

I'm digging in my garbage for a couple pills to dull down my future shakes that I just know are gonna be coming before sundown.

Despite being not in shape to fucking drive anywhere, I still go because I know if I don't go, Doc will come here and I don't need him here.

It's morbid walking into the office to see Vince, Tommy, and Mick sitting and waiting for me while Doc sits behind his desk.

"Fuck me." I complain out loud, dreading what Doc's about to go on about.

"Sit." Doc tells me and I plop down beside Tommy, sighing, and Doc waits a minute before saying, "I canceled the European tour."

"What?" Vince asks and Mick furrows his brows.

"What the fuck, Doc--"

"--Shut the fuck up and listen." He cuts me off while Tommy nervously shakes his leg. "If you bastards go to Europe, one of you will come back in a body bag. And I'm not gonna be the fucking manager that runs Mötley Crüe into the ground." He states harshly.

"That's a fucking first." I laugh out, meanly, and Doc glares at me. "Guess dead rockstars don't make as much money as alive ones, huh? I coulda told ya that after Razzle--"

"--Nikki." Mick states.

"Where's my wife?" I snap next.

"Oh, the one you so stupidly filed for divorce from without giving me a heads up first? Probably with her friends that haven't put her through the ringer and fucked her over time and time again." He states.

"I didn't know I needed permission to make decisions in my personal life--that have nothing to do with Mötley Crüe."

"Are you two just gonna argue or are we gonna actually talk about why we're here because I have things to do." Vince grumbles.

"Tommy came to me and told me he's thinking about rehab." Doc tells us and I glance at Tommy, who's avoiding looking at anybody. "I'm not taking Mötley Crüe on tour again, in a studio, whatever, until you guys get your act together."

We all look at each other, exhaling, and I rub my lips together.

"Fine." Vince sighs, and Doc looks at Tommy.

He nods.

"Nikki?" Doc asks and I just stare at him.

The guys are gone in a few minutes, leaving just me and Doc and I stand up.

"I wanna see Viv." I tell Doc as he digs through some files, and he looks up and blinks from behind his desk,

"She said she's not seeing you until you get help." Doc states.

"She says that but I bet I could find her tonight and still get her under me in less than three minutes."

"Assuming she's not still under Duff." Doc says and I tense up. "You think I didn't notice how questionably close they got on tour?" He adds.

"She's going through a crisis." I reply.

"Can't imagine why." He mumbles.

"Just tell me where she's at, Doc." I snap.

"You look like shit. You need to go home and get some fuckin' rest because you're all checking in tomorrow afternoon." He adds.

"I'm not going anywhere until I see my wife."

"You mean the wife you filed for divorce from?" He questions and I roll my jaw. "Your wife is resting. You should, too."

1981

I fumble for my key to the apartment, cussing under my breath when I can't get the door opened.

"Motherfucker." I hiss, finally getting it unlocked and shoving it open…

I slam it shut and toss my keys across the room, hearing Tommy and Vince's room door creak open.

Vivian crosses her arms, a scowl on her face, her hair tousled from sleep.

"Could you be any louder?" She snaps, shutting the door behind her, going to the kitchen.

My eyes run up and down her long legs as she heads that way, only in one of Tommy's t-shirts and panties.

Fuck. Me.

I go to grab the bottle of Jack on the counter, taking a sip as she gulps some water down, a droplet escaping the glass as she drinks, rolling down her chin to her neck and I watch it, my burning throat getting dry as I try to pull myself together, my prick starting to push against my pants.

Damnit.

It's like the sane part of myself is trying to slap the hopelessly horny part of me.

She's fucking evil, dude, fuck off, I tell myself.

She's hot.

You hate each other.

I wonder what weird shit she's into in bed.

She's a bitch. You know she's a bitch. Leave her alone.

Oh, I forgot she's supposedly a virgin.

Go to bed, dumbfuck. GO TO BED.

That means I get to watch her experience stuff for the first time.

I end up chuckling, amused at the thought of seeing her pretty eyes roll in her head as pleasure bombards her for the first time.

"What?" She snaps, and I realize I've been staring at her.

I'm about to answer until I get caught up at the sight of her nipples peering through her shirt...fuck me.

"Nikki," she shoves at my shoulder, making me take my eyes off of her chest.

She just scoffs.

"Go touch yourself in the bathroom or something. Jesus." She puts the glass down and walks past me to go back to Tommy's room.

See? Evil.

I ignore the voice of reason and I catch her wrist and stop her, yanking her closer to me.

She looks like a deer in headlights for a minute before I'm grabbing at her hair closest to her neck and pulling her to me, kissing her.

It's a pretty clean kiss, no tongue, no mess, just testing the waters.

She doesn't push me away or beat me up like I always thought she would do, instead, when I pull away for a moment, she takes a breath, wide eyed, before grabbing me by my jacket, pulling me back in.

I'm surprised but I don't let it get in the way, taking lead a little to guide her.

For someone who's never been kissed before (again, allegedly) she's not awful at it like I expected--well, I didn't expect her to be awful because she's never kissed anybody, I expected her to be awful because she's so mean to me.

Her hands push my jacket off my shoulders and I push my tongue past her lips, coaxing a quiet moan from her.

Holy shit.

My hands go to her ass and she grasps at my hair as I pick her up, her legs wrapping around me.

Just to see if we're on a standard starting basis of common interests, I lift one of my hands and bring it back down, not too hard, but hard enough, and she hums, fucking biting my bottom lip and grinding into me a couple times.

I have to keep from creaming my pants just by her moving against me.

You're being stupid, I tell myself, but I can't bring myself to leave her alone now.

She's been the forbidden fruit or whatever for months now and I just gotta have it.

I take her to my room and kick the door shut with my foot, taking her to the shitty mattress on the floor.

I drop her onto it, seeing her in the glow of streetlights.

"Take your shirt off." I say, lowly, and she rubs her lips together and slowly pulls it over her head, her bare chest exposed and my dick's practically throbbing at this point.

I take her crucifix in my hand, and she looks down at it as I lick my lips.

She unfastens it and throws it aside.

I lean down and kiss her again, trailing down her neck, my tongue against her skin and she gasps out a sharp breath, her hands pulling at my shirt.

I take it off and she's sitting up and running her palms over my shoulders, down my chest, and I grasp her around her throat, pushing her back to the mattress and I feel a little shiver go up her spine.

My tongue circles one of her nipples and she lets out bated breaths as I take it between my teeth.

She moans, loudly, and I move my hand to her mouth.

"Shh!" I say. "You're gonna wake them up." I add and she nods.

I do the same to her other breast, with my hand over her mouth, but then I get an idea.

A glorious, completely selfish idea.

I take my hand off of her mouth and smirk before kissing the middle of her chest, one of her top ribs, biting into it, hard, making her scratch at my shoulder while covering her own mouth as a sharp moan is forced from her.

I run my tongue over the bite mark and continue down her stomach, stopping at the top of her panties, glancing at her.

She's still breathing heavy, hands covering her chest, tilting her head to see me.

I run my hand over her clothed core, a little noise coming from her throat, feeling a big wet spot over her cunt.

She lifts her hips and starts pulling them down and I take them and discard them, running my fingertips up the inside of her thigh before I rub my thumb around her clit that's slickened wet.

Her hands jolt to mine between her legs, her back arching, trying her hardest not to be loud.

I tug her to the edge of the mattress, and grab one of her hands, replacing mine with it before I'm looming over her for a moment. "Touch yourself." I tell her, my lips brushing against hers and I can tell she's blushing under the dark of the room. "C'mon, it's hot, just do what feels good." I add, my lips pressing against hers for a moment before I feel her hand move, a delicate gasp coming from her and I pull my lips from hers to watch her face.

Her eyes close, her head tilts back while her other hand tangles in her hair.

I stand up to take my pants off, grabbing at my painfully hard cock when she bucks her hips against her frail fingers.

"Nikki," she says, eyes still shut, head back, and I rub my hands down my face.

We haven't even fucked yet and I can already tell she's gonna make me a fucking idiot.

I get my pants off and run my thumb over my tip and get some precum on it, leaning down and holding it up to her lips.

"Hold your tongue out," I tell her and she opens her eyes and looks at me, before doing as I say.

The pad of my thumb rubs it over her tongue and she lets out a satisfied sigh, looking up at me as I lick her spit off my thumb.

I get back up on my feet for a moment and she gets up and crawls to the foot of the bed, her eyes on my prick, hunger in her eyes…

Nice try, evil bitch, you're not stealing my soul by sucking it through my dick.

I grab her hair and make her look at me.

"Lay down." I tell her and doesn't argue, eyes still ravenous…

I kiss up her kneecap to her thigh, sliding up and up until--

"Oh, fuck!" She whimpers out when my tongue swirls her clit around, getting the first taste of Saint Viv.

My eyes are the ones to roll back, now.

Holy shit.

It's good because she's Satan and needs something to trap you with, that little voice comes back.

Her hands find my hair, her lips find my name and if I don't get ahold of myself, I'll be finding God based on this experience alone.

Apparently she's finding him right now because all she can muster out is, "oh, God."

I find a good rhythm with my tongue, her pussy starting to grind against my face as teasing, little sultry moans flutter through the room.

After a minute I feel her body tense up, and I pat myself on the back as she comes, my tongue lapping at her entrance to get drunk off of her, my hands running over her stomach and thighs.

Vivian claims we just went right into sex without doing anything aside from making out before hand but I distinctly remember going down on her. She must've blacked out once she realized we were about to fool around or something but I remember that happening because it was something I'd dreamed up doing ever since I met her, creepy but honest.

I pry myself from her to grab a rubber behind the head of the mattress, the both of us pulling ourselves up there.

I get it on and turn over, getting on top of her.

She's already hooking her legs around me before I even line myself up with her.

She looks like she's high or drunk, eyes nearly shut, her lip between her teeth, her head tilted slightly, exposing her neck.

I lean down and kiss her neck, her skin damp with sweat and she sighs.

I rub my tip against her opening and she closes her eyes.

I push into her, having to coach myself through because fuck her pussy is tight, and she winces, her mouth opening but nothing coming out. I'm about to ask her if she's alright when she speaks first.

"Take it off." She tells me.

"What?"

"The condom, take it off."

"Are you trying to trap me or something?" I snap at her.

"I wanna feel you." She tells me softly, and I guess it's kinda sweet, or primal, whatever.

I pull out of her and take the condom off, dropping it by the bed before I'm pushing back into her.

We both moan, and I can feel her body stretching to accommodate my entrance, her face showing pain.

I pullout again, but before I can get out completely, she pulls me back in with her legs, letting out a high pitched breath.

More of her juices coat over my cock.

"Fuck, Vivian," I say it, thrusting into her again and she wraps her arms around my back, hugging me to her, and my lips find hers as I push into her again, and again, roughly, the feeling of heaven washing over me each time I go back inside her.

I make her take every inch, forcing myself to fit the last inch and a half despite her body not having room, and she writhes underneath me.

"I think I'm bleeding." She tells me breathlessly and I think she wants me to back off or get off her, but when I go to, she says, "No, keep going, it feels good."

The look on her face is a clear indication that she's into it.

I'm kind of shocked that churchy Vivian is into the same shit I'm into, and I grab her throat, again, and kiss her, our tongues moving together.

"I wanna get on top next." She tells me through moans.

"Why?" I ask.

"I wanna see it." She says and I furrow my brows for a second before I catch on.

I'm rolling off of her and onto my back, my hands running up her thighs and waist when she gets on top of me, and I grab myself as she straddles me, pushing it against her before my hands pull her down onto me.

She screws her eyes shut, as she sinks down to the hilt, her thighs shaking, and I hit her ass cheek as hard as I can and she gets so tight around me I can't pull out until she relaxes.

"You can't do that shit." I tell her harshly, biting back my urge to go ahead and come, and she relaxes a little more as my hands hold at her waist, guiding her movements since she's never done this before.

"Does it feel good?" I ask her, her little moans and whimpers getting me even more hot and bothered.

"Yes," she nods, tipping her head back. "So good."

I look between us, clear view of her pussy taking it, and I sigh.

"It looks good, too." I tell her and she leans down over me, her forehead against my chest as she watches me fuck her for a moment before looking at me, kissing me sloppily, her chest pressing against mine making her sigh when her nipples brush against my skin.

When she pulls away, I'm sticking two fingers in her mouth, taking her by surprise but she starts sucking on them in a second, and I force them down her throat, making her gag, as I start pounding into her, making her nearly shriek out but I gag her with my hand around her throat.

"You're so pretty." I tell her, spit all down her chin from choking on my fingers, eyes nearly shut, my hand around her throat, and I glance down between us, licking my lips. "That pussy's pretty, too." I add and she cries out when my other hand starts rubbing at her clit.

I take my hand from her throat and she gasps for air.

"Nikki, I'm--"

She can't finish.

I roll onto her again, getting on my knees and lift her hips, continuing to hammer into her roughly and her eyes go to the back of her head, as her cum soaks the both of us.

Why the fuck didn't she tell me she can come like that?

I feel myself reaching my own end and go to pull out but she tugs me onto her, kissing me, her legs snaking around me.

At first I don't think she realizes I'm about to blow my kids everywhere, then when I try to pullout, she says, "do it in me, I've heard it feels good."

I look at her like she's crazy because it's something I'd never expect her to say.

"Please, Nikki, let me have it."

I don't have time to argue because I'm finishing with a grunt and a satisfied smile at the sight of tears of pleasure in her eyes before her lids screw shut, her mouth open as a moan leaves her, her body sparking off with shivers.

I let her have it.

"You're a slut." I tell her, thrusting into her a couple more times and she hums at my words.

"Shut up." She says next and I kiss her one last time before rolling off of her.

She pulls the covers over her chest and closes her eyes, tired, and I watch her for a moment.

Okay, she may not be a slut, but I know she's gonna be able to get away with murder and I'm gonna let her because she's fucking Vivian.

I ran myself into my own grave, but heroin and Vivian were major catalysts, but I know I was a catalyst for her own rock bottom, too. We were just too fucking young to know better, I guess. We fell in love and got hooked on playing house without actually stopping to think what all it would look like. Of course, neither of us expected me to be on smack, neither of us expected me to reach the level of stupidity that I reached with Vanity, and neither of us expected her to be conceiving a lovechild while I was next door dying, and I certainly didn't expect to file for divorce first, if at all. I remember that first night together in that shitty apartment got me hooked on her. Not just sex, I actually started listening to what she had to say after that, and wanting to have conversations, and hangout...I fell in love and she made it easy for me to. It was like boiling a frog. Things got worse and worse slowly overtime until BAM! I had Vanity, crack, and junk, and Vivian had Duff and a secret savings account she didn't think our lawyer would get record of. I was pissed, but I knew it was my fault.

All of it was.

I had promised her the world and instead stole everything from her like a life-sucking demon.

She wasn't the evil, manipulative bitch.

I was.

#nikki sixx #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx fanfiction #gateway drug

38 notes · View notes

v1rg1nvodkasprite · 5 years

Text

Hard Liquor Mixed with a Bit of Intellect →Roger Taylor

Summary

Roger had always been known to be hotheaded and fearless whenever it came to fighting but you were known to be worse. A well-known actress with a mind of her own. Roger is intrigued by you and invites you home one night. A month later, you call him and tell him, “I’m having your baby, it’s none of your business. He knows he’s going to pay for this

Warnings: cocaine usage, excessive smoking, excessive drinking, mention of pregnancy, mild smut

Notes: thank u to @rencontre-moi-dans-le-couloir for sending in this amazing idea. i had a lot of fun writing it. enjoy!! x

I opened the pack of Marlboro, taking another cigarette from the box after putting the one that was just in mouth out. The glass of Macallan whisky in my hand was about to run out. The last year had been great for me. Two academy awards under my belt and some others with two signed deals with some of the biggest movie producers in the business.

"Could I maybe get you another?" A long haired blond man asked me. I knew him as Roger Taylor, apparently one of the best drummers in the world and a reputation of having multiple groupies when on tour.

"I can get my own, thanks," I told him, pushing myself from leaning against the doorway. "Wait," he said, grabbing my arm. I turned to him, almost glaring.

"Congratulations on wining... those um awards," he stumbled over his words. I'm sure that probably was the first time someone refused his offer. "Thank you but excuse me, I have another drink to refill."

I smirked, swaying my hips just a little to tease him. Maybe if he tried hard enough, I'd let him in. He was hot and I wouldn't mind playing with him. I just wasn't drunk enough for that yet.

"Y/N L/N!" Is that you?" Freddie Mercury said, in his roaring voice, "Why yes it is. Hello darling, it's been a while.

"Yeah, Fred. It has," I said, hugging him. Freddie and I met at mutual friend's party, throwing back shots and doing lines of cocaine. "How are you, love?" I asked him, smiling.

"Amazing, but I want to know about you. Any men you've done yet? Some I might know?" he asked, looking over my shoulder as he raised his eyebrows. I looked to where his eyes trailed to and was met with a Roger Taylor. I laughed. "Not yet, you know nothing isn't fun without a chase," I smirked.

"Of course, darling. Refill?" he asked, grabbing my drink from me and I nodded. "Friend of Fred's? Funny how we haven't met," Roger said from behind me and I sighed. "Hello, Roger. Yes, how funny," I said, turning to try to find Freddie.

"Let me get you a drink, I promise you won't regret it," he said. "Freddie has got that down already. You're too late," I told him. "Rog! So you've met Y/N, here is your drink. I've got to talk to an old friend but I'll catch up with you later, Y/N?" Fred said, handing me my drink with a wink. I winked back, smirking.

"How about you score some coke and meet me in the limo outside and I'll give you a tour of New York, yeah?" I asked, sipping my drink. "Already got one, I'll grab my jacket and meet you there," he smirked and I nodded.

I left my drink on a table, leaving it to be cleaned up later and got in the limo. "Robert, here's a list of places me and my friend would like to go tonight and then after that take us to mine. I think tonight will be an amusing night," I told the driver after scribbling a list of places down a piece of paper. "Yes, ma'am."

I reached over and took off the lid of the jars of liquor, pouring myself a glass. The car door opened and Roger slid in right next to me. "You ready, Rog," I asked and he nodded, pulling out a small, plastic bag of coke. "Are you ready?" he asked and I smirked, taking the bag from him.

I took a sip of the liquor and then set it down. I grabbed the cross on my necklace, taking it apart and dipping the end of it into the bag. I unbottoned his shirt a little more than it already was, revealing his chest. He looked at me confused, "Got no where to put it," I mumbled to him and he smirked. I pushed him back so his chest was more horizontal and tapped the powder onto him.

I frantically found a credit card and dollar from my purse, straightening out the line. I rolled the dollar up quickly. Making eye contact with him, I lightly licked his chest making him sigh and then snorted the short line. I threw my head back, moaning.

"You're ravishing, sweetheart. My turn," he said, grabbing the end of the broken cross from my neck, doing the same as I did, setting up the line on my thigh. He leaned down, placing a couple kisses right before the line before taking the rolled dollar from the floor and snorted the line.

He groaned, sniffing a bit before going back to kiss my thigh. I smirked, grabbing his shirt and pulled him up to roughly kiss him. He moaned into my mouth and I pulled him closer. Abruptly, I pushed him away, fixing my lipstick.

The limo came to a stop and Tobert came around, opening the door. "Thank you, Robert," I said, slipping him a twenty and he nodded.

"You took me to a ditch?" Roger asked confused and I cocked an eyebrow. "No, I took you to a pub," I told him and he looked at me as if I was crazy. "Sorry, sweetheart but I don't see a pub," he said. I grabbed his hand, leading him down some stairs and knocked on the door.

"Name?" a man asked from behind the door. "Y/N L/N," I told him and the door opened. I had gotten a reputation around here and it wasn't because of my movies or because of the Oscars I had won. "What are we doing here?" Roger asked. I leaned into him, setting my lips against his ear, "You'll see."

There was a small stage in the back of the club that I headed towards, dragging him along with me. I pushed him down in a chair right in front of the stage. I winked at him before turning around, walking up onto the stage, swaying my hips a bit.

I danced slowly, running my fingertips from my hips, dragging them upward. Whistles and howls came from the crowd making me smile. Making eye contact with Roger again, I slowly dropped to the floor and stood up again, pushing my ass out. He shifted slightly in his seat, adjusting his pants. I laughed, getting off stage and grabbing his hand.

"You've got a little something, Roggie," I said, pulling him further into the crowd. "You want to fix it for me, love?" he asked, growling and almost begging. "Maybe later but I still have some more places to show you," I said, kissing his cheek. "Could we hurry it up?" he whined and I laughed. "You're driving me crazy but some how I'm into it," he said, pulling me into a kiss.

I pulled away, licking my lips and smirked. "If you want to hurry this tour up, I suggest we get out of here and move on," I whispered into his ear and he smirked, leading me out of the club.

He opened the door to the limo and I got it, pulling Roger in with me and kissed him roughly. I enjoyed the feeling of his soft lips against mine. I was getting hungrier and hungrier by the second. I pulled away from a whining Roger and tapped on the window. Robert rolled it down, without looking into the back, knowing better that when I had a man in the car that whatever we were doing was most likely not meant to be seen.

"Take us home. I think our tour of New York is over," I said, chuckling as Roger slid his hand up my thigh and kissing my neck. He nodded, rolling the window back up as I turned back to Roger. I straddles his lap, kissing down his neck. Grinding roughly into his lap, I could feel his prominent buldge from underneath me. His soft moans in my ear were like music in my ears.

"Roggie, wouldn't you want to wait until we get back to my place? We'd have so much more fun and time there with all the toys I have," I whispered and he growled, removing me from his lap.

"Then it'd be best if you didn't make me cum in my pants. Then there wouldn't be any fun at all," he said, kissing my cheek.

Once we got home, the sexual tension had built up so much that it couldn't be cut, even with the sharpest of knives. He pushed me up against my door, once he had slammed it closed. Moving us to the bed as quickly as possible.

The rest of the night consisted of three rounds of moaning, groaning and growling. I woke up and Roger was still asleep next to me. I sighed, changing quickly and scribbling down a short note to Roger that I was going to be out for the day and that I expected him to be up and out by the time I got back.

Weeks passed by and I had started to feel sick and my period was late. I was on birth control and had been the night Roger and I slept together. I silently cursed, grabbing a pregnancy test I stashed in the back of my medicine cabinet.

After waiting for a few minutes, I turned over the test after taking it and showing as positive. I sighed, dialing up Freddie. "Hello, darling! What are you doing calling me at this hour," he greeted me. I laughed, "Is Mr. Mercury seriously not up by now? It's 3:00pm."

"Well after the last night I had, it called for some sleeping in and a hangover cure. Now, what can I do for you?" he asked, groaning a bit. "Roger's number, please. I promise to tell you all about our rendez-vous later when you aren't in so much pain," I explained and he laughed. "Sure, darling. Whatever you wish," he told me and then proceeded to inform me of the phone number. I bid my goodbye after saying thank you and quickly dialed up Roger.

"Hello?" he answered, groggily. "Jesus, is everybody sleeping past 12:00 and hung over?" I sighed. "Y/N! I wasn't expecting you to call," he said with a sudden enthusiasm. "Listen, I'm having your baby and it's none of your business," I told him, bluntly. "Woah, wait. This is getting crazy. What do you mean you're having my baby? I think I'm losing it," he mumbled under his breathe. "You're not. You heard correctly. Goodbye Roger," I told him before hanging up, abruptly. "I'm going to pay for this," I mumbled.

taglist

@rrrogah-tayluhh , @simplyvictoria-93 , @johnrichardsondeaconn , @satanspaghetti , @rogersrager , @rogahmtaylah , @johnricharddeaconn

97 notes · View notes

cjnovelwriter · 3 years

Text

CHAPTER 1: POOL

I'm so bored. Where did mother put my tablet? Tch. Taking me to her friends birthday piscine party without my iPad.

"Kertin! Come over! The weather is nice and the pool is great! There are other kids why not go and play with them?" My mom shouted from the pool. I shrugged and grabbed my bag. There are the restrooms. I opened the door and saw a butt naked kid rummaging through his bag. When he saw me he hastily tried to tie up a towel around his waist. Totally indifferent I closed the door and walked up to the chair next to his.

"Hello." I spoke to break the silence. The orange next to me stiffened at the greeting. He was awfully red. I glanced at him while taking of my shirt.

Orange POV

This guy entered the changing room and saw me entirely naked but was left unfazed. He dropped his bag on the bench near me and greeted me. Ah! What a manly voice. I'm so embarrassed. That was a weird encounter. Damn. He took of his shirt. The biceps. That rock hard chest and those abs. His long dark green hair. Fuck. Stop with your gay thoughts idiot. A hot guy as him probably either has a girlfriend or his straight."Sorry! Um...hello!" I finally managed to say when I noticed ha had been looking waiting for an answer."I'm Lukertinamon. But feel free to shorten my name how you want." He said taking his swimsuit from his bag."I-I'm Vicelinian! Nice to meet you!" Gosh. I'm so in love. I have been fanboy so much but then I realized he was taking off his boxers. I turned around and boiled of embarrassment."Aren't we both males? What's with the get up?"

Lukertinamon POV

As I asked him that I finished removing my boxers. The orange haired was so embarrassed he couldn't answer. To save him, I quickly put on my swimsuit and patted his shoulder."I've finished." With an abnormally speed he shoved his swim pants without taking off the towel. I packed my bag and prepared when he shouted."You're so cute!" Ugh-What?! Calm down. Damn. He almost made me lose my calm. He was obviously blushing."Okay. Thanks." That was all I could respond. But little did I know I dragged myself into a really adventurous story.

Here we are. Outside. I walked up to my chair to drop my bag. But I was walking so slow. Guess why? Tangerine was hanging on my waist hugging me. Not that I hated it but heck."Oh young master! Have I told you I was a master at swimming?" He let go and talked moving around like a kid."Young master?" I asked. The guy bowed and looked up to me."You're a celebrity after all. Calling you otherwise would be disrespectful. I'm just some mere civilian." Ok. So he recognizes the fact I'm a known guy. Suddenly he pushed me to where my mom, his, and a bunch of elders were chatting. They all stopped talking in shock. No one has ever dragged me that way. He pointed to his mother."Mom! This is my new friend!" He introduced. Wait what?! Friend?"No. We just met." I started heading to the pool."It's fine Kertin!" My mom added. I knew what she ment. I'm not allowed to have contacts but she accepted him. He ran and jumped on me leading us to fall into the water. Then he started laughing."Hey. Um...Lin...?" I tried to catch his attention."Yeah!" I really want to do it."You're gay right?" I held his arms."Yes!" Immediately I dragged both of us under the water for no one to see us. We stared at each other for a second and then I placed my lips on his. It started off with just a simple kiss. But it didn't bother so he let my tongue slide in to deepen the kiss. After a couple of seconds, we broke apart and went back up gasping for air.

Vicelinian POV

Wait?! DID HE JUST KISS ME?!?!?! And I should admit, he's a god damn good kisser. I suppose he doesn't want our parents to know so I'm not gonna make a scene. I went close to him and whispered."Hey tall guy...Why did you kiss me?"He looked around for a bit."I felt like it. Didn't you like it""Oh~" I hopped on him and we enjoyed the pool. Some girls our age approached us followed by other guys. I instantly recognize them. They were my bullies at school. I slid down Amon's back and behind."Greetings young master."They all greeted first. Suddenly I can feel someone grabbing my hair."We'll get rid of this trash for you okay? He doesn't deserve to be on your friend list.""Ah!" I actually thought he was going to abandon me due to his cold attitude yet he pushed the girl on my hair and clutched my head on his torso."Fuck off" Being it the prince's order they eventually vanished. After, he took me out of the pool. I just noticed. His hair tie fell off. His marvelous hair sticking to his neck. I helped him out and he dragged me inside my house."Where's your room?" Wow! That was unexpected. I pointed a room upstairs. He carried me bride style to my room. The tall guy laid me on my bed and climbed on top of me. WHAT IS HE GOING TO DO?!?! Does he want to do it with me?! Oh please! I'm just a 13 years old kid! I'm not ready for that yet. That's when I feel more weight on me. Aw. He just wanted to sleep on me. I ran my fingers over his muscular body causing him to hug me tighter. His sleepy face is so cute! Can't believe I'm this close to the <Untouchable Young Master>. I don't want to ask why he is this close to me yet. Let's enjoy the moment first.

___________________________________

Heya guys!

I'm a huge fan of bl and this is a little story for you guys!

I also do sketches here!

Luv ya!😘

0 notes

platinumshawnn · 6 years

Text

goodbye home, sweet, home | s. mendes

Summary: Shawn and Eva finally meet face to face for the first time since their split to say their goodbyes to the place they once called home, reflecting on the memories of their time together.

A/N: I've been in a Shawn writing block phase but I found this in my drafts and decided to finish it up and post it while i work on 3 requests and a part for my Jack lowden mini series so!!! Just a note also that I based this a few years ahead to when Shawn is 21/22.

Word count: 1,290

“There's one last box and then it's all good to go. Yeah.” Shawn murmured into the phone as his eyes downcast to the final box that was pressed up against the wall, waiting to be taken away. It had been the last one he wanted to touch, having procrastinated for days about it, unsure if he was entirely ready to let go of the place he once called home.

The time on his phone told him it was just past 3AM, the city outside still buzzing with life as people streamed out of clubs into the streets, drunk and bubbling with conversation; stumbling out of clubs. The noise of nightlife.

It was the fact that this apartment was surrounded by clubs and was right smack dab in middle of everything that almost prevented the move in, but it had only taken him two days to get her to say yes as they sat on her sister's couch. The TV had been on playing some old movie neither of them knew, their attention anywhere but on it as it played as a background sound. He had the pictures pulled up on his phone while she lied across his lap, head tilted so she could see as he scrolled through the images; silent as she squinted, considering his words very carefully and weighing every option they currently had.

"It doesn't even have to be a forever thing, we’re not staying there the rest of our lives, it's just for now. We’re young, right? And then when we get a little older and there's little ones around…” He drifted, using his fingers to mimic the idea of feet running around; reaching up to gently tap her upper lip as she let out a laugh. “we’ll move. This is perfect for now.”

Her eyes lifted to look at him, seeing the hopeful look in his eyes as he waited for a response which earned a sigh and a soft, “Okay, okay, it's perfect. You got me.” She said, defeated, his grin widening in turn.

“You sold the apartment.” Eva piped up from behind him, his head whipping around to find her in the open door that he had intentionally left open to make moving the boxes from apartment-to-truck easier, stood there with her arms folded over her chest and red nosed from the cold, his eyes immediately landing on the ring snug around her fourth finger on her left hand. His eyes lingered there a moment too long while the voice of his realtor on the other end of his phone continued to run down a list of things that he could hardly focus on, his mouth suddenly dry as he muttered a quiet ‘sorry’ into his phone, explaining quickly that he would call back later before he hung up; hardly waiting for a response. He then let out a choked laughing sound before clearing his throat.

“Yeah, it took a while but...it’s official.” He explained. “The new tenants move in next Wednesday, I just have to get them the property paperwork.”

He watched as she smiled slightly, although this one was the type that didn't reach her eyes as she nodded, slowly scanning around the empty room that had once been the living room they had shared for a little over a year. Shawn had no idea what to say, part of him not wanting to disturb her as she seemed to be lost in thought while she gave the room one last look.

“I never understood what drew you to this place.” She confessed quietly. He swallowed and looked around for himself.

With a slow shrug of his shoulders, he answered, “It’s small, comfy, not suffocating but comfy. And the noise I guess. I hate silence, I made a habit looking for places to be where there was noise so I didn't feel lonely. So it didn't feel like it was just me, if that makes any sense.” He tried to explain, inhaling deeply. “I hate being left on my own to think too much.”

“And does it ever work?” She asked, her eyes turning to look at the notches in the doorway to the kitchen, a joke they had started after she had made a comment that it felt like he was still growing even as a grown adult man -- certain he would never stop. She had started it to prove that he was still growing, keeping track of his height and checking every other month. And sure enough he did. She looked back at him. “Being around noise?”

He breathed out a dry laugh, “Sometimes. Not all the time unfortunately. But I still try. Even though I know it hardly works. I still feel alone.”

She let out a soft huff that imitated a laugh, but it seemed strained as she then cleared her throat. “I got your message, I just figured...I’d stop by, pick my stuff up myself instead of burdening you to drop it off.” She explained, waving to the last box still sitting there.

Rather quickly, he shook his head, bending to pick it up, “It’s not a burden, don't- don't even worry. You're never a burden.” He rambled nervously, cursing to himself as the words seemed to come out without even thinking first, coming out wrong. “I mean, doing this for you wouldn't have been a problem -- like…”

“Don't worry, I got you.” She softly assured, the two awkwardly standing there looking at one another in the minute of silence that followed, unsure what else to say. Shawn glanced down at the box that he had written an E on, looking up at her and taking a couple steps forward to hold it out towards the brunette who pushed a lock of hair behind her right ear before she moved forward to meet him.

“Here, should probably...give you this.” He drifted, carefully passing the box off to her, her hands skimming his as she took it, causing him to tense and hold his breath until she backed up, putting space between them once again. He had figured she would take the box and leave immediately but instead, she propped the knee on her knee as she bent her leg slightly, opening the top of the box and glance in, one arm still holding the box while the other hand reached in to push through its contents a bit. When her hand lifted out, she held a necklace that had his old ring around the chain, eyes glancing to the piece of jewelry that she seemed to give too much attention to before holding it out in the palm of her hand.

“You should probably keep this.” She stated quietly. Shawn stood there, hesitating before he reached out to gather it from her hand and looked at it, raising an eyebrow while peeking up at her.

“You sure? You can keep it, it might not fit anymore, my hands I think have grown a bit.” He said, the comment bringing a smile to her angelic face.

“No, it's alright. I don't think I should…” She drifted, picking the box up again and backing up towards the door before she turned, stopping halfway out the door to look at him, “Thanks, Shawn. I'll see you around.”

He nodded, chewing the inside of his cheek as his hands lowered to his sides, necklace still in his hand. “Yeah,” He shortly replied. “I’m sorry.” He quickly added before she was entirely out the door, her mouth opening with a stutter, her expression surprised as she inhaled, sighing the breath out after a moment.

“I'm sorry too.” she quietly stated before leaving, not bothering to even look back again as she left with her box in her arms.

#shawn peter raul mendes #shawn x oc #shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #works

42 notes · View notes

thelocalshooter · 4 years

Text

The Local Shooter Vs. B-LIFE

(LS) Hello thank you being apart of a great come up and welcome, may we get a small introduction for the people reading who don’t know who you are, where are you from? Who are you? And what do you do?

(B) I'm B-L1FE or B to most. I am an Indiana native but for the last 4 years I've been in the Houston, TX area. I do everything except make beats. I'm a recording artist myself, I engineer, DJ, design, visuals, animations, curate. To add to all that I'm also the CEO of my own record label, FAITH×VICTORY Records. I also am the CEO of three other companies: SupportArt which is a promotion company that also houses a collective, and MeditatedMerch which is my clothing line. There is stuff I'm missing I'm sure but I'm basically the one stop shop for good underground business.

(LS) Being a Texas native how do you feel that the music scene has impacted you and your creativeness?

(B) The scene in the H has never really impacted me much but surround regions have amazingly unique sounds that are almost nice accents to a style like mine that blends hip hop with metal and alt rock. The Dallas FT. Worth area is full of this new wave sound that people like Jah or $not really helped catapult. Then south Florida is known for the wild hype sounds they give us like Pouya. I think these regions influenced me by just kind of telling me hey its ight to let go and just be me. I used to be signed under a different stage name and to be honest it was all bullshit. All the rules and what they wanted me to be. This area in general just let the monster loose I guess you could say.

(LS) You also run a blog on your own called supportart where its a platform for many creative artist in the underground, how did that come about and how long have you been running it?

(B) We are gonna be two years old in June which is unreal. We house 20 artists at the moment including myself. It honestly all started as a group chat of artists trying to put together a collective mixtape. Most people didnt come through but it actually opened a networking portal that led us to our first client who was King Kap who at the time was signed to Quality Control. We continue to work with him to this day and alongside the leaders I make the calls with (Yung N ICy, Fat Daddy J, Psych Ward, Penny the Shabba, Waveon, wa55up, & Kaster) we just had the flood gates opened on us. Alot of trial and error but never once have we been exposed or finessed. We work hard for the underground and have new ways coming soon to showcase hidden talent.

(LS) you seem to be a jack of all trades with graphics, producing, and much more! What do you feel is your strongest creative outlet for you and why?

(B) All the other crafts came from being a recording artist. I think I truly shine there. Away from the art and visuals, I've had some pretty big accomplishments as the rapper B-L1FE. Sometimes I forget to push my own stuff when I'm so busy pushing the underground or my artists. In 2019 I dropped my first and sophomore album which did well. Underviews did an article naming me a young mogul. I made the underground freshman list which was amazing to be with the likes of GNAR, Lord Xan, 916frosty, and more. But if anything compares it's my graphic design. I've been doing design since I was 14 and I'm almost 28 now. I still have every graphic I've done and my portfolio now have close to 6000 pieces. It's the main reason I could leave the day job life behind.

(LS) You also happen to be on all major platforms with a couple single releases, where did you first find your passion for music? Also how did you know that it was going to be a career for you?

(B) My parents didnt really do much parenting but they did raise me around terrific music. I have right now I believe 83 songs on all major platforms which is quite a bit since my contract from the previous record label didnt expire until April of 2018. My parents raised me around Dr. Dre, Bone Thugs, Snoop, Nas, Destinys Child, Master P, and all the greats. So I had this around me so much at 12 I started writing structured songs and didnt even realize it. Football was passion #1 but when I decided to rescend my commitment to Eastern Michigan University, I started toying around with being in a band. After awhile my vocal cords suffered from pure metal music. So I turned to rap which was also like a hobby. Then once I began to network in around 2012 I noticed I had something alot of others didnt. So it was then I knew. The rest was waiting for the contract I signed stupidly to expire. My biggest influences would be Chronic 2001 by Dr. Dre and Hybrid Theory by Linkin Park.

(LS) Your most recent single regurgitate and there’s a single called “Welcome To Hell” which did amazing numbers on Twitter! What was the whole process behind those songs and why did you pick that specific song to shows case the project?

(B) The process behind these two singles were both random to be honest. I put out my second EP back in December and wanted to take my time on my third album so I do what I call SINGLE SZN. I drop a new song on major platforms every week. It started with my first single of 2020 which was 'Never' and 'Welcome to Hell' was the second. With that one it was Angry Orphan's concept (featured artist) and he sent me his parts and a rough idea and I thought since we both are lyrical artists let's do what Em and Royce do when they collab and take these same schemes but change our words and small parts of our flows. It made a very cohesive song. The marketing is always the same for me. I let people know way before something drops that it's coming. The main key is promoting stuff more than once. So many people drop a track, run it through some group chats for that day, and then leave it to die. You gotta keep pushing content towards people. With 'Regurgitate' I hadn't even planned a part of it. I woke up to an email from SupportArt's head engineer, Penny the Shabba, that two beats. One was the beat for that song. Wrote it in 15 mins recorded it mixed it, he mastered it while I did the cover, and within 4 or so hours a full song was ready and off to distrubution.

(LS) What’s a regular day in the life of B-LIFE? Do you wake up in the morning go to the studio? Do you wake up in the morning and start interviewing people and check on your blog? What is the first thing you do when you wake up?

(B) The minute I wake up I need a shower. Cant start the day right without it. My studio and everything is at home so I just go off my daily planner. I keep everything written down including my own personal stuff and I usually pick whatever project I really dont wanna do to start. That way I'm getting through the 'blah' jobs with full energy and the shit I'll enjoy doing I save for later when I'm drained. Usually first thing I do business wise is touch base with my team. We use telegram so we can avoid social media. We a family so they come first. Next is clients. Always touch base with any clients waiting still or people I may have had halfway to the payment phase.

(LS) juggling music, blogs, graphics, and also a clothing brand how do you know when to find time for each creative outlet? Do you set a certain schedule for certain things? Do you have a certain day for certain things how does that work for you?

(B) I wish I knew. Everyday is dedicated to everything. I didnt want to say okay Tuesday we design only covers and logos but sell 5 videos the night before that Tuesday. I ask my clients for deadlines and bundle clients I tell them the timeframes. To be honest my turnaround is so quick and I've done this for so long I do it super fast. Some AMV clients get their video back in an hour with their mind blown. I try not to look at it as such a big work load. Whenever I do feel overwhelmed then its time for like 30 mins on the xbox or a jog. Somehow I never run out of creativity which certainly helps.

(LS) What’s your main goal as far as music? Do you plan on getting signed, are you looking to stay independent? Is music even your full on passion or are you looking to stay more on the blog and manager/artist development side or what is your main goal?

(B) Main goal is to get my label signed how Travis Scott did with Cactus Jack. It keeps the artist safe and in it's own way allows you to stay independent but with proper funding. Music is the main passion. I never say I manage my artists. We push them to build their own brands and we help them with that. I'm simply just keeping a platform all about love. The rest does it's own thing all by itself. Truly amazing.

(LS) Thank you again for being a part of this great come up, is there anything else you would like for the readers to know about you? Or should we keep our eyes peeled for anything to come in 2020? What are some links that you can share were new readers can go ahead and find your work?

(B) You can find everything related to be via my linktree which is linktr.ee/lifewitha1

Album 3's first single drops May 1st and you can already pre order it on Apple Music. Its titled 'Bob Ross' and ensomber produced it. Tune in. Tap in. We out here not just for us but for everybody with the it's always love approach. Just dont get shit twisted haha. You can find me everywhere but soundcloud. Bless up everybody and much love to The Local Shooter. Houston we strong!!

The Local Shooter Vs. B-L1FE

0 notes

rossl32123 · 5 years

Text

Broken Clouds, 14°C

7 Pacific Hwy, Mooney Mooney NSW 2083, Australia

Of jobs

So many jobs, so little time. What have I been doing with myself.

Resealing leaking hatches. Of all the jobs taken on this year resealing the forward hatch has taken the most time. It would have helped alot to have known the hatch was bolted down before I started, not screwed. To get access to the nuts you have to take down the ceiling lining, including removing the hand rails, then remove the hatch lining. Once it was all apart I sanded back all the woodwork and varnished it with as many coats as I thought I could get away with, then put it all back together with at least half a tube if sikaflex. I think it still leaks!

The sail locker hatch came apart much more easily, there is no ceiling liner in that part of the boat. Much sikaflex, and butyl tape on the bolt heads seems to have got this one done although I still suspect leaks.

I took the foot of the self tackers boom off the deck and rebedded it with butyl tape.

The anchor winch has been dismantled and the lower clutch remachined.

The main anchor chain has been removed from the locker, measured (80m), marked at 10m intervals, and returned to the locker. The bitter end was treated with some anti rust spray.

Both anchor rodes are now all gal shackles and swivels. All shackles have been seized but I might switch to cable ties for that job, particularly as playing with different anchor/chain combinations requires undoing the shackles, which isn't so easy once they have been seized with stainless wire.

Both head sails have been inspected by a sail maker and restitching done where it has flogged out. Toe and head tacks have also been cleaned up.

The sailmaker has also replaced all the clears that were smashed by the hail storm last year, and built me a new mizzen. The old one tore at the leech clew, so I had it repaired, but then it tore again as I was trying to bend it back on. He wasn't so keen to repair it again. The clears need some new studs fitting to the cockpit canopy, which I still have to do. The corrosion in the aluminum frame where the old ones pulled out is quite bad, probably because of the stainless fittings weren't isolated properly.

I fitted a new set of blocks on the self tackers sheet track so that I can control the car from the cockpit. This required jam cleats and guides as well, but I got quite alot of the components second hand so it wasn't too expensive. I came up with this solution after the self tacker flogged the sheet car back and forth along the traveller and blew out the stops and the track end caps, which you can't get anymore for the type of track I have.

More hatch work. The aft cabin hatch wouldn't come apart, even after I took all the head lining down around it. I just could not get the hatch liner to come out, so I though to myself, "How much of this taking to bits regime do I have to force on myself? All the woodwork I had removed I cleaned up and varnished, then I cleaned up the hatch and liner/surround, taped it off and varnished it all in place. Since it didn't seem to leak through the flange, only through one corner of the main seal, and the control gasket, I figured I'd get away with it.

Also, the main cabin has two small hatches, these don't leak either, so I sanded their liners back in situ, and varnished them (3 coats). The big hatch in the main cabin is next, followed by the woodwork at the entry although I've already started this (couldn't help myself). There's also a bit of woodwork under the main sheet traveller which I've started preparing to varnish.

The genoa halyard was replaced, at the same time I ran up a block to the head of the sail so that I could reave a halyard to it for raising the spare genoa onto the same foil for going wing on wing.

I've started work on a solution for preventing halyards from tangling in the mast steps. This will involve climbing both masts at some stage to run light lines up the outside of the steps, then drilling through the steps to fit cable ties (or some such) to hold the line in place.

The steering disconnect control cable has been replaced.

A new topping lift has been installed on the mizzen boom.

The diesel heater has been demystified. After using all the diesel from the header tank last year it's remained empty while I figured out how to top it up again. That required quite a bit of time tracing plumbing and electrical cabling. Eventually I worked out that the "circulation pump" switch on the DC panel also allows the lift pump to top up the tank, provided you open the tap next to the gen set, and pull the switch under the heater. What had me really confused to start with was that I didn't know where the pump was, and the circulation pump is for water through the wet back, so how did the diesel get into the tank? Also, the sight tube was so brown inside that at first I thought it was copper pipe, then once I replaced it I couldn't figure out the tap at the top of the tank. It turned out that the bleed valve you close when you fill the tank so that any overflow goes down the return line, and you open it so as to avoid an airlock when your using the heater. The sight guage is also part of the filling line, which provided another level of confusion, as you can't tell the level in the tank while filling it. You have to turn the pump off and wait for the level to settle. Anyway, it's all good now, really cosy in fact, except that the water circulation doesn't seem to be reaching the heat exchangers fore and aft, but that problem is low on the list.

The saltwater pump for the desk wash down wasn't working too well. I started by replacing the ancient old gross particle filter with a more modern plastic one, but the pump still only runs for about 2 or 3 minutes before petering out. While searching under the rear cabin berth I discovered 2 other pumps in a plastic bag, underneath where the installed pump was. I'm not sure why they were stashed there because they were rubbish, but perhaps they were there to remind me just how long these things last.

I cleaned up alot of mess from under the rear cabin berth, including about half a litre of spilt Dextron. I would like to know where that came from as there were no obvious signs. I also restowed the spare engine parts under there to make room for more personal items in the foot locker, and I worked out a way of rolling the mattress out of the way so that you can get at that area. Previously I had been pulling the mattress off the bed and into the companionway, which was an all around pain. Now I can lift both ends to access a length of webbing which I can use to tie the mattress into a roll.

Rooting around under the stove I discovered that the igniters do have a power source. Ive been using a gas lighter for the last two years. It is only a small AA battery, but it had plenty of life in it so I returned it to its holder and lo, spark ignition!

The chart table chair now slides forward on its track, and locks as designed.

I replaced the broken pin in the track slider that the whisker pole snaps onto with a dowel of hard wood. I've also managed to get a second slider organised, it's pretty rough, but you have to have one if you want to wing on wing the headsails. Now I just need to free up the seized pin in the spare whisker pole, and work out how to get the spare slider onto the mast track.

I took the main compass off the binnacle, thinking that perhaps I'd better inspect and oil the engine control lines. There was a fair bit of corrosion in the compass mount as the screws where stainless through aluminium. I have an idea to replace the whole control panel at some stage. The compass is a bit of an anachronism these days but I'm not sure if I should toss it out. The depth guage is so old it uses vacuum tubes to display the numbers, but it does work. The GPSs screen has burnt out, although the unit still works! The wind indicator panel is fine, although it only gives apparent wind at the moment, however, the wind speed sensor is unreliable. Since it is also an ancient unit (despite being self powered and wireless) you can't get parts for it. When I climb the mast to do the step protector job I'll have to take it down and figure out what I can do with it. I really would like to have a completely wireless system of wind speed and direction, hull speed, depth and sea temp coming through to a couple of guages by the wheel, and also to the computer and any other device that can use the data, like iSailor and OpenCPN.

I was dissappointed with the amount of power the vacuum cleaner gets through. It's almost as bad as the microwave. When you pull 100 amps from the battery bank the voltage drops very quickly, and puts the batteries under stress. Two minutes of vacuuming will do it. I did discover that besides running the battery charger part of the inverter, the gen set will also power all the 120V sockets, when it's running. This was a surprise as I was under the impression that the gen set only recharged the battery bank. Now I know I can run all the 120V equipment on the boat I like, provided I put up with the gen set running.

I have discovered the trick to the 2hp outboard! It has always been a problem for me, so much so the I stopped using it for quite a while. Even after dealing with getting water in the carburettor all the time it still ran unreliably, usually quitting after having only run for 50m. After some considerable time putting up with it, it became apparent that it was fuel starvation. If I tilted the motor up when it was just about to die, it would fire up again for another 5m. Looking into the fuel tank one day I discovered that the inlet pipe sat up off the bottom of the tank by a good 2-3cm. With the angle of the transom on the dinghy, plus the inlet pipe being on the high side of the tank you only have to run the tank down about a third before she starts sucking air. Unfortunately you can't level the motor off as the fitting adjustment as rusted up solid. Never mind, atleast I know now that you just have to keep the tank topped up.

0 notes

youspoketome · 5 years

Text

My Favorite Albums of 2018

I tried something new this year. All year long, every time I bought a new album I added it to a note on my phone as a list so that I could adjust the order as needed. Some things settled into their order quickly, but a couple spots went down to the wire. Embarrassingly, I was just looking at my 2015 list and six albums on that list were the previous albums by six of the bands on this list, and one was a solo album by the singer of a seventh band listed here. I'm not quite sure what that means in the grand scheme of things. And that seems like a long enough introduction, so here we go!

Murder By Death - THE OTHER SHORE

Honestly, I thought Murder By Death was finished having albums on top of my best of lists. I had been so disappointed in GOOD MORNING, MAGPIE. That album had like two good songs, but the rest was at best forgettable filler and at worst sounded like a parody of themselves. The two albums since then had definitely been better, but still not at the levels of their earlier albums. Enter THE OTHER SHORE: an incredible return to the long form concept album following a story of love and dying planets in a western in space. It's full of catchy hooks without ever being clichè, small character moments and big, world-ending finishes. Best of all, it's got ripping 2-minute long cello solos. This is peak Murder By Death right here.

mewithoutYou - [UNTITLED]

mewithoutYou is another band I've loved for years, but thought was coming off of a weaker album. I enjoyed PALE HORSES (it made my top ten list the year it came out), but it didn't have anything that really grabbed me and made it a necessary part of the mwY canon. [UNTITLED] immediately feels important. It's not the most easily accessable album, but when have mewithoutYou ever been accessable? This is an album that has layers that you can appreciate as you dig down to them on further listens. Over the years mwY's sound has evolved from the heavier hollerin' of [A->B] LIFE and CATCH FOR US THE FOXES to the completely clean and folky IT'S ALL CRAZY... and back again. [UNTITLED] really blends things together by taking the heaviness from early albums and adding them in for flavor rather than building the songs around them, giving the songs depth and intensity. For my money, it's their best album since BROTHER, SISTER. Still waiting on that album/EP collector's edition to ship though, so no pictures.

Gregory Alan Isakov - EVENING MACHINES

I've enjoyed Gregory Alan Isakov's previous albums of folky songs fit for sitting on the front porch at your farm while reading an old book, but whenever I'd see him live my favorite song was always the non-album track "Liars" and I'd always wish he'd record it. That song seemed darker than anything else he'd written and had this slow build to an epic climax that almost gave you chills. He finally did record it on his studio album with the Colorado Symphony in 2016 and then he followed that up with his most eclectic album yet. From the soft and haunting opener "Berth," all the way to the end, EVENING MACHINES expands on what Isakov is willing to do, keeping that same welcoming, mellow feel, but getting there in new ways and with new instruments. "Caves" captures that darkness "Liars" had in a way that is wholly satisfying to me. It feels like he wrote the album I didn't even realize I had been wanting him to write all along.

Emery - EVE

I've always enjoyed Emery, but it wasn't until their last album YOU WERE NEVER ALONE when they broke the album down song by song on a behind the scenes podcast that I fully appreciated them as musicians. Unlike a lot of bands that came out at the same time in the same genre, Emery is a band with multiple members who have actually studied how music works and can point out and name every single time signature and key change in every song. Now with EVE, I've been able to listen to the little details, noticing and appreciating the attention they give to every little part of each song. The way they don't add the screamed vocal at this part of the song because that seems to obvious, so they save it for when it'll be more striking. How they add the harmonies and layer the vocals. Some bands with that kind of background forget how to write a catchy song or what makes a song enjoyable to listen to, but Emery has this ability to perfectly blend this crazy musicianship with honest, straight from the gut songwriting. The end result is an album full of fantastic songs with awesome little parts and details that make it special and stand out.

Thrice - PALMS

For me (and a lot of people, I think) Thrice and Thursday have always been kind of linked. I discovered them at the same time, both on their second albums. They were post-hardcore bands, similar enough sounding to compare to each other and they both started experimenting with their sound on their fourth albums. Then they both announced they were breaking up within a day of each other. The weird thing is when I first discovered them, I preferred Thursday hands down. Then they both released their third albums and cemented my opinions of them, so much so that I decided not to buy Thrice's fourth album when it came out. Man, that was a huge mistake. That fourth album, VHEISSU was the album when Thrice hit their stride, expanding and exploring their sound with each release since then. Each of their post-reunion albums have continued this trend and PALMS might be their best full album yet.

Frank Turner - BE MORE KIND

To be honest, I'm surprised this album is this far down. If you had me rank my expected best albums of the year list at the beginning of the year, Frank Turner with have been number one with a bullet. But BE MORE KIND was not the album I was expecting, and I was a little let down by it. That I'm saying that my number 6 album of the year was a bit of a let down should tell you how highly I think of Frank Turner. It starts off strong with the mellow opener of "Don't Worry" followed by a full on banger in "1933." But the third track "Little Changes" just didn't hit for me. It seemed like Frank Turner dumbed down for the masses. And it's not that it's too poppy; I enjoy myself a good pop song. It's just that the songwriting seems so simple. There are a number of really good songs throughout the rest of the album (like "Blackout"), but the overarching feel for me is that it's too simplistic, there's no depth to any of the songwriting. All that said, it's hard to rag too much on it because how can you bash an album that's sole message is to be kind and positive and to treat other people decently? Maybe it's that message that made him lose his teeth. In summation, I like Frank Turner a lot, even when he's disappointing me.

Smoking Popes - INTO THE AGONY

INTO THE AGONY is the Smoking Popes first album in seven years. They were putting out albums more frequently than that while they were broken up! After being broken up from 1999-2005, the Popes returned with STAY DOWN, which was not the strongest album to come back on. It was mostly a downer and ended up being completely forgettable for me. This time, upon returning from a seven year album cycle with new album they've knocked it out of the park. It's upbeat and catchy, it's slow and meaningful, it features Josh Caterer's soaring vocals, and it's another fantastic entry into the catalog.

Death Cab For Cutie - THANK YOU FOR TODAY

I think Death Cab's existence as a band is better broken up into stages. You've got the pre-TRANSATLANTICISM era, the TRANS/PLANS era, NARROW/CODES, and now KINTSUGI/THANK YOU. TRANS/PLANS is my favorite era. It's where I discovered Death Cab, it's where I spend the most time with them, it's just the best. But after a bit of a dip there for a couple albums (not saying they were bad, it was just a dip), I felt like KINTSUGI was a step back up, and now THANK YOU FOR TODAY continues in the same vein. It's a more electronic/synthy sound than previous eras, which sets it apart from their highest peaks, so you're not just constantly comparing it to something they'll probably never reattain. I really enjoy where this era is taking them.

Alkaline Trio - IS THIS THING CURSED?

This past summer I decided to give Alkaline Trio's AGONY & IRONY a listen for the first time in I don't know how long. Everyone agrees Alkaline Trio used to be good and then got less good, and I agree, but that specific album was for me the low point, mostly because of "Love Love Kiss Kiss." But then this weird thing happened: I really enjoyed it. Even that song, which is still doofy, wasn't as bad as I remembered. I was so bummed out about it at the time, but that album has some really good songs on it. Even at their lowest point, I still really like Alkaline Trio. IS THIS THING CURSED? is a new Alkaline Trio album. It's got Matt songs, it's got Dan songs, it's got one Dan song that kind of too doofy (Little Help?), it strangely has multiple song titles that end in question marks, and it has an acoustic closer featuring Matt's scratchy-voiced wailing. This is another solid Alkaline Trio album.

The Decemberists - I'LL BE YOUR GIRL

Every year at the same time, all of the baseball websites post their top prospects lists, where they rank the upcoming minor league players in all of baseball or on each team individually, so people can get excited about the next wave of baseball All-Stars. In almost all of these lists you've got your top five or six guys who are clearly the best players in that team's minor league system in that order, but then at about number seven they kind of become interchangeable for a while. You could switch prospect #8 with #12 and no one would cause too much of a ruckus because they're all pretty similar at that point. We've reached that point in my best albums list (really, we reached that point with Alkaline Trio). These final couple spots could have also gone to 6666 by Four Fists, 9 by Saves The Day, KIDS SEE GHOSTS, or if I was in the right mood, even the new MXPX or the Matthew Thiessen solo album. What pushed I'LL BE YOUR GIRL across the line was (a) my wife's incredulousness at my mentioning it might not make the cut and (b) the fact that "Once In My Life" and "Everything Is Awful" have full-on been our anthem songs this past month. This is the Decemberists doing what they do. Folky songs about sea monsters, horse gallop rhythms, and cowboy sing-alongs. Throw in some synth lines to keep things fresh and baby, you've got a stew going.

0 notes

xxisxxisxxis · 3 years

Text

Gateway Drug | Part Eighty-One

Words: 3.6K

Warning(s): Explicit language, drug abuse

Tag List: @unknownoblivion @edwardtriggerhandzz @haileynicoleseavey17 @cierrasixx19 @oskea93 @mgkobsessed @sharon6713 @itsametaphorbriansblog @miriampraez @allie-mcginn @xpoisonousrosesx @rebeccaphillips14 @nicholeh7 @lilmou5ie @tamedhearts @divaanya @6ixx6ixx @ratedrkohardychick91 @floregrohlssard @oldschoolimagineblog @thanks2pete @abaldboi @liith-ium @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels @ytwahsog @scarecrowmax @random-internet-user-4471 @solohqrry @sparxx27 @kaitieskidmore1 @cruecifymesixx @meetthesixxter @sublimeprincesswasteland @arianareirg @girlnight-terror

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

"Babe?" I call as I come in from the hottub, wrapped in a towel, holding my bottle of Pepsi.

Duff's sitting on the couch when I come in, reaching his hand out to grab mine.

"We're celebrating tonight," Duffs tells me, grinning around his cigarette, and I raise my brows.

"For what?" I question him curiously.

"It's been two months since we started dating." He replies.

"And that's worth celebrating?" It comes out before I can stop myself and his smile slowly falters.

"I think so, but if you don't want to—"

"—I didn't mean for it to come out like that, Duff." I tell him.

"No, Viv, it's fine." He assures me.

"I meant, we aren't really a couple, so—" I stop myself once more realizing the grave I'm digging myself as he looks at me with a slightly raised brow, blowing smoke from his nose. "—I'm gonna shut up. What time are we going out?"

"Just whenever." He mumbles and I frown a little.

"Duff, I didn't mean it like that, either, alright? I didn't think you actually considered us a 'couple' since I'm still technically married and you're like a mistress or something." I run a hand through my hair.

"Well, we're having sex, we go out together, we have conversations about our future together, neither of us are seeing other people or have an interest in seeing other people—I assume—so, either we're dating or wasting each other's time."

"Okay, we're dating." I say.

"Are you sure?"

"Duff, seriously?" I question.

"I'm dropping it." He ignores me, reaching for his cigarettes on the coffee table. "I gotta go grab a couple things from my apartment and I'll be back later."

"Alright." I reply, taking in a deep breath before mentioning, "hey if you get back and I'm not here it's because I'm gonna try to find Izzy a little later because we need to talk about something."

"Alright, I love you." He kisses my hair quickly and grabs his keys.

"I love you too." I tell him and he shuts the door.

As soon as he's gone I'm rushing to the guest bathroom and opening the cabinet under the sink, grabbing the grocery bag of pregnancy tests that have yet to be taken.

"God, if you love me…" I say, finishing the prayer in my mind.

Children are and always have been a blessing in my eyes, but that didn't mean I wanted a child then.

"Well, I'll be damned." Izzy mumbles, eyes squinting slightly, holding the test I plopped onto the bar in front of him as he peers into the little window of plastic, seeing another, "|" as opposed to the recent "||" we had seen on my first test.

This is negative test number five of five taken over the course of three days…

"I'm not pregnant." I repeat to him, taking this last test as the set in stone reality.

"Congrats, your gig isn't quite up, yet." He says, grinning crookedly and I roll my eyes as he throws back another shot before saying, "So, here ya go," he digs in his pocket and puts two condoms packets on the bar in front of me, making me shove at his arm, "you obviously don't have any." He states.

"I do, I just don't like using them." I reply, glancing around, seeing the coast is clear of anyone I know in the crowded room.

"You like living on the edge or something?" He questions, aggravating me.

"I like..." I hesitate instead of brazenly saying what I want to. "...you know…"

He furrows his brows and looks at me for a moment.

"...You like what?" He asks me, genuinely not understanding and I sigh.

"I like…that." I widen my eyes slightly for "that," hoping he catches on.

Nothing.

"I don't understand half of what you say so—"

"—I like cum." I rip the bandaid off and he spits his drink out, squeezing his eyes closed to brace the burn of whiskey through his nostrils as well. "And ya know what? It loses its appeal when it's gummed up at the bottom of latex." I add, just to gross him out more.

"Viv, I didn't need to know that!" He scolds me, groaning, rubbing his face.

"Understand me now?" I sarcastically demand.

"Ughh," he wrinkles his nose.

"I like to feel i—"

"Shut up!" He covers his ears and I laugh. "Damn it, Vivian, go back to damn near leaving the room anytime someone mentioned sex." He complains.

"I don't feel weird about talking to you about it because you're like a girl friend." I shrug and he glares at me.

"I'm what?"

"Like a girl friend." I restate and he raises his brows.

"A girl friend?"

"Yeah." I nod.

"You really know how to break a man's balls without even thinking fucking twice about it." He gripes.

"I didn't mean anything bad by that." I say, genuinely.

"You don't tell a guy he's like a girl friend." He argues.

"Well, you are."

"Are what?" Axl's voice is over the crowd and me and Izzy both snatch at the test before he grabs it and hides it in his jacket pocket.

"Wondering what's going on with you and Tansy?" I change the subject quickly when he gets to us and he tries to hide his smile.

"Don't worry about it." He states.

Axl and Tansy, in a new-found relationship, were in a whirlwind of puppy love. So much so that not even a week later, Axl would propose and she would inevitably say, "yes."

"Where's Duff and the guys?" I ask Axl as he grabs a drink and sits beside Izzy and I, lighting a cigarette.

"Steven's with some Cheryl chick, Slash is next door at the strip bar, and Duff…" he trails off, furrowing his brows, "...I don't know where Duff is."

"Oh, well, we were supposed to go out tonight to celebrate our two month." I explain.

"Well, I haven't seen him." Axl shrugs.

"He said he was going to his apartment." I add.

"Haven't seen him." He replies again and I sigh.

"Okay, then, I'm probably gonna head home and just wait there for him."

"He's staying with you?" Axl asks and I nod.

"Yeah?"

"In Nikki's house?" Izzy adds.

"...Yes?"

They look at each other and then look at me.

"What?"

"Whore around much?" Axl comments, about to throw back his shot but I knock the glass from his hand and tiredly glare at him.

"A lot, actually." I reply. "Screw you."

I turn to go.

"Viv, c'mon," Izzy sighs as Axl storms off.

"No, I have some more whoring to go do while my husband's off." I tell him.

"He's an asshole, Vivian, you know that." He says in reference to Axl but I just keep walking.

When I get on the street, I head next door to see if he's by any chance with Slash.

Before I can head that way, I'm halting at the sound of a sharp whistle followed by, "God damn!"

Getting ready to get arrested, again, I turn and my hostility melts away.

Robbin's grinning at me.

"Where the hell have you been?!" I ask him as he walks to me.

"I was gonna ask you the same thing." He states, hugging me. "I've seen all the shit in the press and figured you'd gone to Japan with Nikki to work things out or whatever." He adds.

"There is no 'working things out,' Robbin." I reply and he furrows his brows.

"What?"

"I'm filing for a divorce when he gets back." I explain.

"What? No, Viv, you can't do that, you guys are Nikki and Viv." He tells me.

"No, we're Nikki and Heroin and Mistress and Viv." I smartly shoot back.

"I hate that you guys gotta go through this." He admits.

"Well, we got married knowing it might not work out." I shrug.

"Yeah, but seeing you two being married and making it work got me to realize it's something I want, too, you know? I just didn't think it'd be like this. You two used to be obsessed with each other." He rubs the back of his neck, frowning a little.

"Well, it is what it is, Robbin." I say.

"It's bullshit is what it is."

"Talk to him about it." I scoff.

"Rob, c'mon!" A couple friends he's with call down the street and we both look in their direction.

"Well, it was nice seeing you, we need to see each other more often, you know." I smile softly at him and he nods.

"I hope things work out, Viv. I really do." He reassures me and I nod.

"Thanks."

"See ya later." He grins, patting my cheek before going to his buddies.

"Later." I mumble as he goes.

I breathe out and head into the strip joint, not finding Slash or Duff or anyone I knew.

I eventually give up and just go home because I need to finish decorating for Christmas, anyway.

Hoping to find Duff at home, I instead come in to an empty house and a sleepy Whisky.

"Hey, boy." I step to him and reach down, petting him, feeling a small ache in my heart realizing how much he's grown since Nikki first got him a few months ago.

We were happy when he first got him.

Now look at us.

I force it out of mind and decide to get distracted with Christmas.

I should've got a shower and gone to bed because I ended up getting thrown into a pit of heartbreak all over again whilst trying to find our star for the Christmas tree that I swore I had put in a closet at some point last year to move it out of the way…

"C'mon, you've got it be here somewhere." I mumble, digging around on the top shelf, my hand feeling something familiar.

I furrow my brows and lift the random junk to see the Bible Nikki had gotten me for valentines day this year that had "gotten lost."

The star is a distant memory as I grab the Bible and step off the step-stool I was using and innocently open it where the ribbon is tucked by the back cover.

I see a scribbling of Nikki's handwriting.

Vivian,

I don't know if it's offensive to write in one of these, but my place in hell is already solidified so I might as well piss God off some more. Sorry, I know you don't like when I say I'm going to hell even though we both know it's true. The one problem I have with where I'm fated to spend eternity, is that I know you won't be there. I realized this exactly one year ago. I came pretty close to being over with and I would be burning currently (or just laying in the fucking ground, or flying around as a reincarnated bird, whatever the hell happens to us when we go) had I not made it through. I know I'm scaring you with how much I do, Viv. I hear you talking to God about it when you pray. You're afraid I'm not going to wake up one day. I'm afraid, too. I know, right, Nikki Sixx is scared of something, who would've thought? I'm afraid I'm going to take my last breath without telling you how much I love you. I knew I loved you that night you snuck me into your window and asked me to help you bullshit that damn thesis paper for your final. That was six years ago, almost, and I wish I would have been telling you that I love you all along, maybe it would have changed the path of certain things that have happened. I'm sorry for what I've done, what I'm doing, and what I will do. It's my cross to carry. It's not your fault, it never has been, it never will be. I hope you can forgive me if I'm not here this time next year...if I don't get any better, I'll be in a coffin before our tour ends. Jeez, this sounds like a suicide note. I promise that's not why I'm writing this. I hope I'm around as long as you are. I hope we're together in the next life, whether it's as two birds that mate for life, pecking at each other's eyes, or our spirits just find one another. If God is real, all I'll need is for him to let me know you've made it up there and that you'll be okay, and I'll go to Hell and take the brimstone and fire for all the damage I've done. Just don't forget me, whatever happens. I won't ever forget you. I love you, Vivian. I won't ever forget you. I love you.

—Nikki

My body locks up, my joints tensing, my nose burning as tears come to my eyes...I start shaking, an uncomfortable lump clogging my throat...fury encapsulates me.

I'm throwing the Bible at the wall, pulling at my hair, screaming and yelling incomprehensibly before finally choking out, "why didn't you tell me this?!" I bark at Nikki who's across the country and can't hear me.

But I'm saying it loud enough that he probably could if he really tried.

I guess a part of me might've considered staying with him had he expressed his feelings to me earlier on in our relationship. It's nice to hear, "I love you," even if someone doesn't mean it.

I felt robbed. I felt I deserved for Nikki to tell me that before I found out about Vanity...before he started choosing drugs over me...before I started sleeping with someone else…

I lay down and just stare at the mirror ceiling looking back at me, an ugly crack causing my reflection to scatter in multiples.

Nikki must've broken it at some point before leaving.

I don't know what the point of getting a mirrored ceiling was...perversion or whatever, I suppose. But the money and time spent repairing the damn thing over the years…

I glance at Whisky, curled up on Nikki's side of the bed, talking in his sleep while his back legs twitch a little.

Maybe he's actually reliving a good memory of Nikki.

All I can think of is,

"I got on it to help with my shoulder and finish my parts of the album so it would be ready in time." He tells me honestly.

"And your shoulder's healed now, Nikki. So why are you still bothering with it?" I ask, looking at him.

"It's not like I'm injecting the shit, Vivian." He argues, getting defensive. "Go read your Bible or pray or something...anything."***

And,

I throw the syringe at him, screaming out, "when did you start doing this?!" as tears reappear in my eyes.

I expect him to come fight me, he instead ignores my outburst and leans down to grab the box of needles.

I get up and follow after him, my hands shoving at his back, nearly causing him to trip over himself.

"Answer my fucking question!" I demand him, my voice shaking. I get the reaction I want, the plastic of syringes and metal of needles colliding loudly with the wall when he throws the box of them angrily and spins around.

"Vivian, it's just recreational. It's not serious. I got it under control." He tries to defend himself and I close my eyes, realizing I'll never win.

Then,

"Andy." I cry out, keeping my hands on Nikki's chest, but the Finnish rockstar keeps yelling back and forth with the dealer. "Andy." I repeat, louder, but he still doesn't hear me. "Andy!" I'm pleading in a holler, catching his attention. "I-I can't do this, I'm sick, just call an ambulance!" I beg and Andy heads to the phone hanging on the wall.

And,

"Vince, I'm scared." I say in a whisper.

"Viv, you guys are gonna be okay. I'm sure you'll find a way take fix things just to spite people saying you two won't last." He assures me, his hand rubbing comfortingly up and down my back. "Look at me." He says and I do, and he wipes at my tears. "It'll be fine, alright?" I nod. "Okay?"

"Okay." I reply, sniffling again.

Also,

I'm hitting the floor as fast as I can, screaming as my ears ache from the noise as he just starts shooting repeatedly, and the house shakes, my only chance of protection is getting under the bed and I rush to get there, covering my ears as my spine paralyzes with fear and more shots fire out. I hear things in our house breaking and shattering from buckshot that flies through the open doorway as Nikki is shouting "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!" with raw tears in his voice.

Then,

"I'm getting married, look." Vanity states, taking her left hand out of Arsenio's hold and flashes a shining ring on her ring finger and my ears perk up, apparently Tansy's pulled from her drugged stupor, because her heavy eye lids pop open and her face pales when I look at her as I hear Arsenio comment, "okay, um, here's something for Jett magazine," going with the sudden turn of events presented by the starlet.

"Did you know she was engaged?" I ask Tansy and she's at a loss of words. "I didn't even know she was dating anybody."

"Vivian." Tansy's tone is dreadful and I wait for her to tell me about it, Arsenio cracking jokes in the background, causing Vanity's enthusiastic laughter to infiltrate the room.

"This is a beautiful ring." He states, grabbing my attention once more.

"Isn't it pretty?" Vanity agrees as he examines the rock on her finger.

"You, didn't you--"

"--Nikki Sixx." She interrupts him, and my brows furrow even more, confusion taking over me.***

And,

"How could you do this to me?!" I cry out as he starts trying to walk to me, trying to keep his anger low, but I get away from him, throwing a hotel lamp at him, only for it to shatter on the wall behind him. "What did I do to make you hate me so fucking much, Nikki?! To make you pursue another girl--one of my friends--so fucking hard that you propose to her?! Am I just that fucking forgettable?!" I'm throwing dirty dishes Tommy's used tonight, all of them breaking when they miss Nikki by merely centimeters, hitting the wall.

"Vivian, fuck it off!" He barks and I grab Tommy's switchblade off the nightstand, throwing it next, and it barely misses Nikki's face.

"I hate you!" I say back. "I fucking hate you!"

Finally,

“What's new…" He says with a small smirk, thinking about something before the corners of his mouth fall slowly. "...I've done a lot of shit." He starts and I look at him. "Shit I'm not proud of. I don't fucking know when to just do something a little bit. I can't have a bump, I've gotta go through an eight ball as fast as possible. I can't have a drink, I gotta drink the place dry. I can't have a serious girlfriend, I've gotta marry her." He says, and I glance at him and he shakes his head. "I can't just have a one-night stand, I gotta have a fucking affair." He finishes and I lick my lips, keeping my tears back. "This might be fucked up, but I've realized I don't feel like I shouldn't have had anything with her." He says in reference to Vanity and I furrow my brows. "I just feel like we shouldn't have gotten married to begin with."

I decide to have mercy on myself, refusing to relive anymore of our memories--good or bad--because they don't matter anymore and I don't even give myself time to think about how he finally decided to tell me he loved me after six years of jumping through hoops trying to earn it from him.

Careful not to wake the dog, I get out of bed, hearing Duff's car pull into the driveway, and glance at the clock.

How is it already 4:00a.m.?

I can't help but feel butterflies in my stomach, excited to see him because I've missed him.

When he gets in, he braces himself against the doorway of the foyer, cursing under his breath when his feet dare to slip from underneath him.

"Did you have fun?" I ask him softly, smiling at him and he slowly lifts his head to look at me.

"Y-You're still up?" He asks me, rubbing his face and I chuckle, taking a step to him.

"Yeah?" I reply, wrapping my arms around his waist…

...Noticing he's keeping his hand on his eyes as if he's rubbing them, and his lids are squeezed together.

"Are you okay?" I ask next, reaching up to pull his hand away from his eyes but he stops me.

"Yeah, baby, I'm fine, just go to bed and I'll be there in a second." He tells me calmly, slurring a little.

"Duff, what's wrong?" I don't listen, not buying it for a second.

"Viv…" he sounds disappointed. "Izzy'll be in here in a second."

"Just look at me," I giggle and move his hand again and he hesitates for a second, before sighing, looking me in the eyes.

I can't speak as pin-pointed pupils look down at me, the sudden smell of smack fumes on his clothes invades me, faint but still there.

I go to open my mouth to speak but I can't…

He's floating on heroin and my hopes of normality are drowned.

#nikki sixx #nikki sixx fanfiction #nikki sixx x oc #mötley crüe #gateway drug

46 notes · View notes

xxisxxisxxis · 4 years

Text

Gateway Drug | Part Seventy-One

Sorry it's late, I ended up accidentally drugging myself when I got in from work last. I had a migraine and my mom gave me one her of Amitriptyline and I didn't realize it was going to knock me the fuck out for 12 fucking hours. I woke up earlier today and was so confused, work clothes still on, makeup still on, but my migraine went away so I guess it worked.

I told you guys a cut a part out (I'm saving it for another chapter) part of it was the preview for this chapter with the flashback of when Nikki came home after Viv and Duff were being nasty in his bed...anyway enjoy the chapter!

Words: 4k

Warning(s): explicit language, violence, mentions of drug abuse

Tag List: @unknownoblivion @sinningsixx @edwardtriggerhandzz @lemmyjelly @haileynicoleseavey17 @cierrasixx19 @oskea93 @mgkobsessed @vamprlestat @sharon6713 @itsametaphorbriansblog @miriampraez @allie-mcginn @xpoisonousrosesx @rebeccaphillips14 @nicholeh7 @fandomshit6000 @lilmou5ie @tamedhearts @divaanya @kingbouji3 @evrsncnewyork @6ixx6ixx @ratedrkohardychick91 @floregrohlssard @oldschoolimagineblog @thanks2pete @abaldboi @swoopygorl @justjodeye @liith-ium @caos18blog @ytwahsog @shamlessobsession @scarecrowmax @toadspleen @random-internet-user-4471 @solohqrry @loveofmyloif @sparxx27 @kaitieskidmore1 @cruecifymesixx @ijustwanttokiss70srogertaylor @emmaelizabeth2014 @meetthesixxter @sixxsixxsexx @sublimeprincesswasteland @arianareirg @girlnight-terror @mcnibberachi

@fancywasmyname1 @teller258316 @ggorehorror @blowinmeupwithherlove @xrosegoldwolfx @mylifeisjustafeverdream @redlipscrystalskies14 @str4nge-haze

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

"What?" I ask Fred, taking a few deep breaths and he raises his brows.

"They just got here today, Viv, there's no way in hell that kid's biting the hand that's feeding him, over you, without there being a damn good reason." He states and I sigh, only causing him to nod his head. "That's what I thought. Does Sixx know?"

My eyes widen as I glare at him as if he's crazy.

"Is Nikki acting like he knows?" I sarcastically say and Fred crosses his arms. "No." I add, deciding now is not the time for sarcasm. "No, Nikki doesn't know...I mean, we haven't been seeing each other, really. We've only hooked up one time." I try to reason.

"When?"

"When we went on break in September for a few days." I explain, fumbling with my fingers.

"What, you got a hotel room or something?" He presses and I apparently give away what happened because his eyes are going to the size of saucers and he's raising his eyebrows.

"Fred," I start.

"You fucked another man in Sixx's house?" He asks me in shock that I had the audacity to do such a thing.

"He slept with Vanity in our house, so why not?"

"Yes, because the way to put a fire out is to start a completely different fire!" He raises his voice.

"Shh!" I put my hand over his mouth. "If anyone finds out about this, I'm done with, and so is Guns N' Roses." I hiss at him.

"Highly doubt Duff's waking up after a night of plowing you like a field, thinking about his career, or else he wouldn't be sleeping with you in the first place." Fred says back quietly. "And you, what the fuck are you doing? Are you insane? If you get caught you're done for."

"I know."

"Then why're you letting it happen?"

"I don't know, alright? I just…" I let out a breath and think for a moment.

"Do you like, love him or something?"

"No, of course not." I insist. "Well, I love him, but not like in love with him."

"Do you love Nikki?"

"It doesn't matter if I do or not. We're over with once the tour is done."

"You've both completely annihilated your vows, Vivian, I think it's safe to say you two have been over." He replies and I don't answer, ignoring that realization.

I continued to ignore that realization until Nikki served me divorce papers once he got out of the hospital after he overdosed.

I try to hold back a laugh as Donna politely rejects Steven for the umpteenth time since he met her, and he pouts at me as she walks away.

“Viv, I’m going crazy.” He tells me. “I’m losing the charm, I think.”

“Oh, c’mon, Stevie, you aren’t losing the charm. Donna’s just a hard nut to crack because she and Emi have been put on a ‘don’t sleep with the opening band’ order.” I suggest and he maintains his let down facial expression. “And Emi and Mick are already a thing and catch hell for it, so Donna’s more than likely not wanting to be in the same predicament.”

“This is so unfair.” He crosses his arms.

“Just hook up with groupies.” I shrug.

“I’m trying but they’re all leftovers from what Tommy, Vince and Nikk--” He abruptly stops speaking and I raise my brows.

“What was that?” I ask him.

“Nothing…” He mumbles.

“I already thought Nikki was hooking up with groupies, but thank you for confirming it.”

“Well,” He starts, glancing around to make sure the coast is clear before he’s pointing out, “you’re hooking up with someone else, too, so does it matter?”

He’s got a valid point and I raise my brows, deciding I can’t argue with that.

“No.” I say quietly. “I suppose it doesn’t.”

The guys are getting off stage soon enough, being brought back down from hyperventilation before starting in for tonight’s plans.

“Strip club.” Tommy and Vince say simultaneously.

“Stevie, you comin’ with?” Tommy offers and Steven glances at me as if asking for permission although I honestly don’t care if he hangs out with them or not.

I’m just waiting for Duff to finish up his conversation with Axl and Izzy in their dressing room.

“Mick, you wanna come?” Tommy asks next, resulting in Mick glancing at Emi.

She shakes her head a little bit, barely noticeable. Barely.

Nikki lets out a shiteating laugh and I prepare for what’s about to happen.

“Nikki, lay off--”

“--Tommy, you shouldn’t have asked. You know Mick can’t take his mouth away from Emi’s teat long enough to make his own big boy decisions.” Vince and Tommy laugh at Nikki’s words, while Mick just lets out a heavy sigh and looks down at the ground not wanting to argue.

“Okay, Nikki, seriously, stop.” I state, glaring at him.

“Okay, Vivian, seriously, mind your own fucking business and stop being such a--”

“--Hey, everybody shut it.” Fred pops his head in, hearing an argument about to start. “Guns is riding back to the hotel with us, their ride has a flat.” He adds.

"Whoo!" Steven cheers, high-fiving Tommy.

I slip past Fred to see Axl and Duff waiting for us to get ready to go.

"Where's Slash?" I ask them, furrowing my brows a little.

He's soon enough stumbling from the bathroom, wiping vomit from his mouth, causing me to wrinkle my nose as he mutters, "I'm right here."

Slash was Nikki's trouble-buddy on the tour. They'd stay at the hotel bar until it closed nearly every night before hitting the town. Most of the time Tommy and Steven would tag along or split and go do something else of their own.

Axl never really bonded with the guys as much as Izzy, Duff, Slash, and Stevie did, but everyone got along and considered each other good friends.

Crazy how things would take a turn a couple years later.

We all wait patiently to file into the bus one by one and, of course, Vince and Tommy have girls with them while Nikki seems satisfied by just having a conversation with Slash and Izzy.

I catch myself looking for Tansy and Sparkie...until I remember they left to go score.

All is well until Mick says something to Emi and she giggles like a school girl with a crush, and I can see Nikki's face getting red with anger as she's about to step ahead of Mick onto the bus.

Nikki's plucking Slash's Jack bottle from his hand and pours the whiskey down Emi's jacket.

She gasps, stopping in her tracks, horror on her face as she turns around to face him.

"Nikki, what the hell is wrong with you?!" I demand.

"Oops." Nikki slickly smirks, handing the now empty bottle back to Slash, who--like everyone else--is at a loss for words as Nikki cuts in line and gets on the bus before Emi can recover.

I look at Duff, trying not to get overwhelmed with anger.

He shrugs his jacket off, preparing to offer it to Emi so she doesn't have to wear her wet jacket.

"Here, you can borrow mine." He tells her and she looks at him a second, tears in her eyes as Tommy, Vince, and their groupies walk around her to get inside.

"Thanks." She mumbles, taking her wet jacket off and slipping on Duff's warm, dry one.

"That wasn't cool." Steven mumbles about Nikki when we get on the bus, seeing him and Tommy laughing obnoxiously while Emi and Mick sit as far away as possible.

I'm about to plop down beside Steven when I see Nikki whisper something to Tommy a couple seats ahead of us.

He smiles deviously at whatever Nikki just told him, before he's drinking a gulp of Jack and keeping it in his mouth, only to stand up, walk to the back seats, and spit it on Emi and Mick.

Nikki ruptures into sick laughter with Tommy, and I've had enough.

I glance down at Steven's skull ring and take advantage of him not paying attention, to take it off of him, quickly.

"Viv, what're you--"

I don't give him the time to finish his question before I've got the ring on, and I'm standing up as Tommy comes back by, punching him--his skin splitting where the heavy ring made contact.

I can tell he’s seeing red, I don’t help much when I sarcastically add, “oops.”

Everyone’s struggling to get as apart before he can slap me, Steven letting out a high-pitched scream when Tommy tries to bombard over him to get to me after Stevie pushes me on the other side of him.

Duff and Nikki get Tommy off of me and Steven, a trail of blood running down my friend’s cheek.

“Get her off my fucking bus!” Tommy demands at Fred once he comes back here to settle everyone off while Doc is behind the wheel.

“I wish someone would try to kick me off.” I threaten, knowing they wouldn’t get my ass off the bus without getting mauled first.

“Why the fuck can’t you take a fucking joke without being a fucking psychopath?!” Tommy asks me, yelling.

“You spitting a drink on them isn’t a fucking joke, just like Nikki pouring alcohol all over her isn’t a fucking joke!” I hiss back.

“If it bothered her, she would fucking speak up, Vivian, you’re not Jesus--stop trying to save everybody!” He sneers.

“She can’t speak up for herself because you assholes would try to fucking fire her!”

“And that’s none of your business if we did!”

“Both of you, shut the fuck up and calm do--”

“--I’m not calming down until you get that crazy bitch off this fucking bus.” Tommy interrupts Fred.

“Tommy, we’re not kicking her off the bus, now sit down!” Fred insists.

“You don’t have to kick me out, I’m gone.” I state, grabbing my purse, stepping over Steven’s legs to get in the aisle.

“Vivian, sit down!” Nikki orders me where he’s now standing, and I scoff in his face and shove past him.

“Vivian, please, don’t go anywhere.” Fred pleads, tired, and just wanting everyone to behave.

“I’d rather burn for an eternity than spend another minute on this bus with such sad, disgusting, strung out, drunk, bitter people!” I shout, walking to the door.

I hear several steps behind me, and I think it’s Nikki and Fred stomping after me, but I turn to see Axl, Izzy, Duff, and Steven following after me.

Slash is already passed out, oblivious to what’s been happening.

“K.” I say to Doc as he glances at me and sighs out. “Can you stop the bus and open this door?”

I thought we would get off that bus and walk to the hotel in peace, but turns out I left one fight and got into another one.

“You didn’t have to follow me, Axl, alright? I didn’t ask you to so there was no reason for you to come out here with me!” I tell him after he makes a comment about me getting them in trouble, possibly.

“No, I didn’t have to, but you’re my friend and I didn’t want you to be out here by yourself, even though you wouldn’t have to be if you would have just taken a breath and let it go instead of starting a fight, as usual!”

“We’re in Alabama, Axl! It’s not like I’m gonna get kidnapped--nobody wants to fuck me down here because I’m not related to any of them!”

“Both of you are overreacting! Vivian, you shouldn’t have punched Tommy but I understand why you did! Axl, we’re not gonna get in trouble or kicked off the tour for making sure Nikki’s wife doesn’t get snatched up! Now, can we please go to the hotel so I can get ready and go out and get some chicks of my own because I’m tired of sloppy seconds!” Steven outbursts.

Me and Axl look at each other, knowing we’re arguing over something deeper than just him getting off the bus for me.

"Axl, this is not what it looks like, alright?” Duff camly says as we get covered up.

“Not what it looks like?! Do you think I’m fucking blind, Duff, what the fuck are you thinking?! Oh, wait, sorry, you’re not!” He explodes, his face bright red.

“Axl, can you please just let us explai--”

“--You shut up, Viv! I don’t wanna hear another damn thing from you because you just proved to me you could give a fuck about our band.” He points at me. “And what you--all of us--have busted our fucking balls for is about to be completely undone over some fucking pussy?! Are you fucking me right now?!” He says to Duff.

“It’s not just ‘some pussy’, Axl.” Duff states, getting defensive.

“I swear to fucking God, Duff, if you say ‘I love her’ I’m going to--”

“--I do love her.” Duff interrupts him, and Axl’s throwing one of his rings at the wall, causing it to hit a decorative painting, breaking the glass in the photo frame, causing me to jolt a little.

“Axl, c’mon, now it could be worse.” Izzy steps into the room, sitting down on the bed next to us, rubbing his forehead.

“Could be worse? These guys--her fucking husband, Nikki Sixx, yeah, you fucking remember him--are giving us a fucking shot on this tour. And the first fucking night in…” He trails off, at a loss for words, clenching his jaw and rubbing at his face.

“It wasn’t just tonight.” I start, waiting for Axl to look at me as Duff lets out a ragged breath, waiting for Axl to scream again. “It happened back in September, too.”

“You sound awfully proud of that, Viv, you really do. Cheating on Nikki--”

“--He cheated first, Axl. And then you all hid it from me.” I snap.

“I don’t care if you fucking cheat back, Vivian, but out of all the fucking people there is to get your revenge fuck in with, you choose somebody in our band--who’s friends with the band Nikki’s in. That’s what I don’t fucking like. But hey, if you wanna go down as the whore who wrecked Guns N’ Roses’ shot, then go ahead, but if we get kicked off this tour because of you, Nikki will be the least of your worries.”

“You don’t know what I’ve been through, Axl, you don’t know the living hell I’ve been enduring for three years of my relationship, you don’t know.”

“That’s not my fault when you could’ve left him then. But you stayed and now you’re putting our necks at risk just so you can get your fucking rocks off.”

“He and I are getting divorced anyway so what the hell does it matter?”

“It’s my fucking band!” He insists. “It’s our fucking career, our fucking music, our fucking dream, all on the line over you! And if Nikki finds out, he’s not gonna be going through the technicalities of ‘well, we’re getting divorced anyway so it doesn’t matter’, he’s just gonna think of his wife getting screwed by one of his friends whose band he’s given a chance! That’s why it fucking matters!”

“Hey, this isn’t her fault, man, alright?!” Duff jumps in. “If you wanna blame someone, blame me, it’s my fault anyway! I’m the one who told her how I felt about her when she was vulnerable and shit happened!”

“Fine.” Axl says, exhaling.

“Sorry for fighting.” I mumble.

We finally get back to the hotel in an hour, managing to dodge seeing any of the guys, Fred, or Doc when we get in.

Once Duff and I are back in his room, he’s getting out of my shower while I'm aimlessly flipping through TV channels, trying to find something to watch.

"Hey, Viv?" I hear him call and I put the remote down and step to him, leaning against the bathroom door, nothing but a towel wrapped around his hips.

"What's up?" I ask and he looks at me.

"I forgot my hairbrush." He tells me and I smile a little before stepping to my suitcase to grab mine while he finishes drying off and pulls his boxer shorts on, stepping into the room. "Thanks." He says when I hand it to him and he roughly goes through the strands of his hair, making me cringe.

"Don't be so mean to your hair, Duff, geez." I comment, taking the brush from him, sitting on the bed. "C'mere." I motion him over and he playfully rolls his eyes and sits in front of me while I stand on my knees at his back and gently brush through his bleached tresses. "You need to start using more conditioner." I tell him.

"That's what Stevie tells me when he sees me struggling with it." He informs me with a chuckle.

When I'm done, I'm putting my brush back in my bag and getting into bed, under the covers.

"I'm sorry if this is a let down but I'm too tired to finish what we started earlier." I admit to him as he gets into bed with me and shuts the light off.

"Tell me about it." He replies, his hand gently playing with the red strands of my hair strewn across my pillow. "And it's not a let down. Just laying in the same bed as you is well over good enough." He assures me and I look at him, smiling.

I scoot a little closer to him, my arm wrapping around his waist, my lips kissing at his for a brief second as his arm snakes around me.

"Goodnight, Duff." I say quietly.

"G'night, Viv." He tells me, and for the first time in months, I sleep through the night, completely.

I sleep through the entire day, waking up to the feeling of lips kissing up my neck, Duff’s soft hair brushing against my skin and I hum.

“What time is it?” I ask him, stretching, smiling softly as he kisses at my cheek next.

“Five o’clock.” He replies, moving to get off of me, but I wrap my legs around his hips and stop him.

“What time do we have to leave here for the show?”

“It’s an off day, remember?” He reminds me and I raise a brow.

“Oh, it is. I forgot.” I admit.

“Well, you have been asleep the whole day, so.” He brushes some of my hair from my face.

“Wanna get some room service tonight?” I offer.

"Me and the guys were gonna hangout tonight." He explains. "But Steven already said I needed to bring you." He adds. "So if you wanna come, you can."

"Okay." I nod, rubbing my lips together. "Have you seen Nikki today?"

"He and Tommy were by the pool with Tansy and Sparkie earlier."

"Is Tommy's cheek okay?"

"It's bruised, but I don't think it'll scar where Steven's ring got him."

"Ughh, I'm gonna have to apologize to him for that." I mumble, looking at the ceiling. "I just wish him and Nikki would just leave Emi and Mick alone. I mean, you can't help who you like, you know?"

"Talk to Nikki and Tommy about it." Duff suggests.

"They'll laugh in my face if I say, 'you can't help who you like'." I state.

"...Yeah, maybe don't say anything." He agrees after thinking on it for a moment.

"Yeah." I giggle, kissing his cheek. "Alright, you're free." I release my legs from his waist so he can get up. "I gotta shower and get ready and I'll meet you guys. Who's room do I need to go to?"

"Probably Stevie's." He tells me, getting up.

"Okay, I'll see you in a few minutes." I reply, getting out of bed and heading to the bathroom.

He stops me before I can close the bathroom door, about to kiss me.

"Babe, my breath." I lean back to avoid embarrassment.

"I don't care." He states, pressing his lips to mine chastely. "See you in a few." He says before walking out.

Once I get a shower and get clothes on, skipping out on doing my hair and makeup because these guys saw me look like hell for weeks when Nikki and I took those couple months apart, before I head down to Steven's room.

When I go to knock on the door, it's cracked open already, and I peek inside to see he and the guys are nowhere around.

"Oh-kay." I mumble, stepping inside to see if there's any sign they'll be back, like room keys, or shoes, or jackets.

Nothing.

I turn on my heel and head to the door when something appealing catches my eye.

A ziplock of brownies.

My stomach growls, and I realize I haven't eaten since breakfast yesterday morning.

"Just one won't hurt anything." I say to myself.

Fifteen minutes and five brownies later, I'm not even hungry for actual dinner.

I put the bag back where I got it and head downstairs to see Steven, Axl, Izzy, Duff, Slash, Nikki and Tommy at the bar.

I don't give Tommy or Nikki a second glance before sitting next to Steven and Duff.

"You drinking?" Izzy asks me, amused I'm sitting at the "big boy" table.

"No." I reply.

"You want food?" Duff asks me.

"Nah, I'm full on brownies." I explain and Slash and Steven suddenly stop dead in their tracks, mid-drink, before looking down the bar at each other, and then to me.

"On what?" Slash asks me, cautiously.

"She said, 'brownies'." Axl tells him.

"Oh...from where?" Steven asks me and I furrow my brows.

"Your room, why?"

"Oh, okay...um, hey, I think I forgot my rubbers in my room." Steven gets off the barstool. "Slash, you wanna come with me?"

"Nah, man, I'm--" Steven's pulling him off the stool by the back of his jacket, the two of them walking quickly to the elevator.

Me and Duff exchange glances and follow after them, Duff's hand keeping the elevator doors from closing at the last second.

Steven looks pained when we step in with them, eyeing the two of them.

"What's going on?" Duff asks them, casually, wanting to get to the bottom of it.

"Nothing." Stevie denies, shaking his head a little.

"Steven, be honest." I add and he shrugs.

"Nothing's going on." He says, matter-of-fact.

"Stevie--"

I'm cut off when the doors open on our floor and Steven takes off to his room, getting the door unlocked, heading to the bag of brownies with Slash on his heels.

"Steven, what's wrong?" I ask when me and Duff catch up.

"Oh, no." He lets out, slightly panicked. "Oh, no, no. Not good. Oh, God. Oh, I'm gonna be sick." He runs his fingers through this blonde hair.

"Steven, what is it?" Duff asks him next.

"She ate, like, five!" Steven explains.

"I can get you some more brownies, Steven, it's okay." I chuckle.

Duff looks at the brownies, then and Slash and Steven, then back at the brownies, then at me, then back at the brownies…

"Were these…? Duff asks them, raising his brows.

"Uh huh." Steven winces out and Duff's eyes widen.

"A-And she ate five?"

"Yeah."

"How much was in them?"

"Well...there was like ten in each brownie and she had five so--"

"--You gave her fifty milligrams of weed brownies?!"

"Of what?!" I ask.

"I didn't give them to her, she ate them herself!" Steven points out.

"Oh, no." I say aloud.

"Oh, no" was right.

#nikki sixx #mötley crüe #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx fanfiction #gateway drug

54 notes · View notes