#i’m just nuts about taylor swift

[disneybrandautism]

here are some taylor swift songs i think each of the sides would like! (with some explanation)

nobody asked for this but im doing this instead of my APUSH homework. i’m going to start with roman and go through all of them!

(some ships are mentioned but it’s only a couple times. i promise it’s not all the songs.)

(roman has the most because he would be the biggest swiftie leave me alone)

Roman

enchanted- you cannot tell me roman wouldn’t love the disney romcom vibes of this song. he would love how sweet it was. it’s like meeting your hero.

i bet you think about me - he’s so petty. he would eat this song up.

mirrorball - i feel like this is a given. he would relate an insane amount to this song.

hoax - “your faithless love is the only hoax i believe in” be so fr. this could apply to any of his friendships or relationships with the other sides. his blind faith in the other sides. yeah.

the archer - we all knew this was coming. he would sob listening to this song.

jump then fall - again with the hopeless romantic bit. he would just thing this song is really cute.

question…? - i just think he’d have fun with song. he’d like the beat and just how much of a bop it is.

tolerate it - do i really have to explain myself? come on. he tolerates all the insults. this is his like standing up for himself era.

king of my heart - king is literally in the title. he would again just have fun with this song. so disney prince of him.

champagne problems - feeling the bad guy and knowing you fucked up. it’s so him oh my god don’t even with me.

i could continue. i won’t. next up is logan!

Logan

say don’t go - i just feel like logan would really relate to needing to hear someone tell him not to leave when he gets into an argument.

innocent - i can’t explain this one i just feel like he would get it.

the lakes - he would love the lakes and just this idea of loving someone like this. “take me to the lakes where are all the poets went to die”. this is his song.

marjorie - i feel like he would appreciate that taylor used her grandmothers vocals for this. i feel like he’s more in it for the genius behind her lyrics.

delicate - he lacks understanding of social cues often. “i know that it’s delicate”. he would eat this song up.

glitch - he would get this song in ways i can’t even describe. he would love the beat. his vibes fr.

no body, no crime - a story based song. he would think about this all the time.

lover - idk a reason i just think he’d really enjoy this song.

Patton

never grow up - he’s like a dad. so. watching his kids grow up. it would destroy him.

invisible string - i feel like he would love the idea of the string of fate. he would like the idea that he was just supposed to know these people.

you’re on your own kid - he would feel the pressure of just being on his own and feeling the pressure of being the moral compass.

state of grace - he feels like everyone is the “worth while fight”. yeah you know what i’m saying.

ivy - “you pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand” THE CARETAKER AGAIN

Me! - listen i know it’s not everyone’s favorite but this makes so much sense. the bright colors. the message of the song. the whole thing screams patton.

long live - he would think it’s a really sweet song. he adores the whole message and just how sweet it is. the nostalgia aspect. yeah.

love story - if anyone was getting this song it would be patton. queue the scene of richie from the bear where he is singing this in the car. that’s pat.

Virgil

electric touch - this is so in your face obvious. of course virgil would love the song with fob on it.

clean - i feel like he would relate to this. he’s finally not an “other side” and he’s just virgil. but he sometimes still misses them.

today was a fairytale - i feel like he would be unapologetically a fearless fan. he’s more of a hopeless romantic than i’m willing to admit. it’s so prinxiety coded idk.

closure - idk just very like “other sides apologize” to virgil. (i believe firmly in sympathetic other sides but i think virgil would struggle for a bit to forgive them)

my tears ricochet - “an i can go anywhere i want, anywhere i want just not home.” home was confusing for a bit. where did he belong? yk?

afterglow - the bridge sounds like asking for reassurance during a panic attack. he would love this song.

the lucky one - he for a bit thought that he was the lucky one but realized that all the sides are messy and no one is perfect.

new year’s day - this is so analogince and it would remind him of his boyfriends. he would pick up bottles with them on new year’s day.

holy shit this is getting long. i’m sorry.

Janus

mastermind - he is so this song. he would love this song. he masterminds everything so i just know he would adore this song.

foolish one - i don’t know but i feel like he would love this song in a way no one can understand.

bigger than the whole sky - he probably feels remorse for all he did to roman. maybe he’s saying goodbye to the possibility of friendship? i don’t know but he would like this song.

you’re losing me - i really don’t have explanations for all these. i feel like janus angst always. he would like how this songs has a lot of self blaming.

bad blood - he has beef with a lot of people. i think he would enjoy this song ironically at first. then he didn’t.

so it goes - he is rocking out to this in his room. i just know it in my heart and soul and it makes me nuts.

dear reader - “if it feels like a trap, you’re already in one” this just feels like janus’ internal monologue. all the contradictions feels like deceit. yeah.

cowboy like me - he just wants someone to want the things he wants. he loves this song. it makes sense in his head.

Remus

cruel summer - he would love the beat. he could and would shake ass to this song.

getaway car - i think he’d endorse the message of this song and think it’s a lot of fun.

cardigan - he comes out when people are bored of roman. he definitely struggled being pushed aside so he likes cardigan a lot.

the way i loved you - he would love the idea that even after fighting with someone an insane amount you can still miss them.

i don’t have anything else for remus. i hope this makes sense. if not i apologize. if you think of anything else for remus let me know. i am just slightly nuts about taylor swift.

#i’m just nuts about taylor swift #roman sanders #tss roman #logan sanders #thomas sanders #sanders sides headcanons #taylor swift #tss logan #tss patton #tss remus #tss janus #all the sides

[quinnfebrey]

it’s really funny that taylor has adopted a reputation for being well-read and book smart because every time she opens her mouth about a real world issue i am forcibly reminded that she stopped going into school after 10th grade (her words), and even then, her formal education was provided by the state of tennessee.

because… what?

to frame patriarchy as this inherent thing that has ALWAYS existed and is as naturally occurring as a blue sky, is just not true. and to frame capitalism as this thing that is inherent is also just… not true. i could never unpack in just a post why those claims are ahistorical, but i will say that it is fucking nuts to look at an issue of capitalism and say “yeah it’s a problem, but, well, i’m just going to win at it 🤩” and call it feminism.

and that is the problem with white feminism. it just turns into idiots trying to speak on single topics and cherry pick their agendas, even though, in a sociopolitical or socioeconomic sense, it doesn’t work like that. you cannot talk about feminism without discussing western society, organized religion, global superpowers, communities of color, colonization, climate change, corporations, monopolies and more. anything less is useless at best and misleading at worst.

(because when you don’t, you get brain dead hot takes like “patriarchy has existed since the dawn of time, and so has money!”)

it’s like how greta thunberg said that she started as just a climate change activist, but now she’s basically a total anti-capitalist advocating for a complete disruption and overthrow to the way the world currently runs because she realized that advocating for that and advocating for climate justice are one and the same.

and if you criticize taylor swift for talking out of her ass, you’ll be hit with brainwashed swifties throwing out the word “misogyny” or “you’d never ask another celebrity this” or “you’re holding her to her own standards” because they’ve been hearing taylor’s bullshit feminism for so long that now they’ve adopted it as their own

taylor’s feminism will NEVER surpass the self-serving role it fills in her life because to do so would mean confronting the bigotry she has upheld, the questionable people she spends her time with, the wealth she is hoarding, her impact on the environment, and much more.

which is… fine, i guess. she doesn’t have to be a good feminist. but in that case she needs to pick a side and shut her fucking mouth about it. because letting her romp around spewing out the most egocentric and individualistic interpretations of it is boring and unhelpful.

#* #i knew that quote kept sticking out to me #like girl what the hell #taylor swift #time magazine #person of the year #white feminism

[rainbowdaisy13]

TTPD The Anthology Summary Part 1 *IMO*

This is viewed through a queer lens because I believe she is fucking done playing nice so now she’s throwing it in our faces—FUCKING SEE ME

1) Fortnight—

I was supposed to be sent away but they forgot to come and get me/I was a functioning alcoholic till nobody noticed my new aesthetic

*MIGHTY GOD we start right out the gate sad as hell—no one noticed her queer flagging both quiet and loud and that pushed her from being a functioning alcoholic to a not functioning one. She then says to the fans who refused to acknowledge her truth “I hope that you’re ok but you’re the reason” FOR ME BEING INSANE

*Mentioning wanting to kill people that’s a first and I love it

*I love you it’s ruining my life OUCH 🤕 yes that sounds like something straight people deal with 😑

2) TTPD-

*I’m sorry I can’t remember what mutual said this, but I love love this as coming from Karlie’s perspective. It absolutely fits. She ground Taylor in a way no one else can

*First mention of suicide—both can’t live without the other

*Were crazy—owning the demons together

*The wedding ring line—GOD

3) MBOBHFT—

*I see this one as Taylor viewing herself as a commodity, also as someone who is broken and needs to be fixed so that she remains lovable. It also gives me Cardigan vibes without the redemption arc

4) Down Bad—

*Love this Alien Abduction theme. Melody is even spacey sounding. The entire song uses alien motifs and I adore it. Fave line “they’ll say I’m nuts if I talk about the existence of you” Brilliant 👽 Also the concept of an Out of this World Love

5) So Long London—

*Cool opening—beautiful when they layer her own voice

How much sad did you think I had in me? 😫

*I see this song as a My Tears Ricochet 2. Taylor giving all her youth to someone for free. You say I abandon the ship but I was going down with it—I truly believe she tried and begged them to let her come out for years and she was always shot down—2 graves 1 gun, more murder imagery

*So Long London, so long Big Machine

6) BDILH—

Absolutely beautiful and heartbreaking song

These people only raise you to cage you 😫

*Sarahs and Hannahs/braided hair/church/Elders making decisions—giving cult/LDS vibes

Stay away from her -Elders are yelling this—to who? Taylor? So Taylor needs to stay away from HER interesting

*Shed rather burn it all down than listen to them complain about her sexuality and how it impacts them

My good name, it’s mine alone to disgrace —absolutely shots fired at Scott Swift

*Soliloquies line is incredible—“I’ll never see” is such a burn 😆

*This isn’t a phase, this is who she is!!

*YOU AINT GOTTA PRAY FOR ME!! GET THEM ALL BITCH—SHOW THEIR ASSES

*This is my choice!!

GET 👏🏼 THEM 👏🏼 ALL

NO YOU CANT COME TO THE WEDDING PERIOD

7) FOTS—

*Pretty Baby, much like Babydoll is reserved for women and gay men and theys and thems. We don’t call straight men this 😒

*Fresh out the slammer—realllly trying to get these idiots to understand that she’s felt jailed /caged/trapped

My friends…Watch me daily disappearing 😫 fuck

Wearing Imaginary rings 😫😫😫 Says hello to paper rings says hello to imaginary lockets

*It’s gonna be alright she did her time!! 🥹

8) FLORIDA!!!—

I adore this song—my second fave on the album and absolute fucking banger. So glad Florence agreed to this they makes an amazing duo vocally—main vibes—Florida is the place Taylor wants to go to fucking escape the mess she lives in day to day. Anything goes, everyone is there hiding from something—the law, family, winter—nothing is too weird or unaccepted—and a certain someone has a house there 😎

My friends all smell like weed or little babies 😆

Florence’s verse is chefs kiss—Earl had to die vibes, watching bodies sink into the swamp, just full on misandry I LOVE IT—is that a bad thing to say in a song?? 😆 GET THEM ALL

Also I bet this song made Swifties uncomfortable 😆

FUCK ME UP FLORIDA 🤘🏼🤘🏿🤘🏾

9) Guilty as sin?

The Gay Longing/Gay Sex Song

*Another* suicide reference—but she’s just joking right swifities?

👀

No no that’s fine she just described an orgasm and if she’s not touching the person, let’s assume the pic below ⬇️ is like HEY THIS IS THE SEX IM SPEAKING ABOUT—it’s very much giving The Man pose for getting dome👀

And then the Jesus reference is just chefs kiss—gay sex is seen as sin and unholy by idiots and she said ok then bitch, what if I tell you the sex is so good we ARE what’s holy??

👀

She literally said messy top lip kiss and got away with it like 😆😆😆😆😆😆😆

10) WAOLOM—

I just……this may be my favorite song of hers ever. It’s absolutely incredible in its intensity, rawness, and truth as well as being a banger

Every lyric screams her pain

My bare hands paved their path/you don’t get to tell me about sad/ If you wanted me dead you should’ve just said

I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street —Witch Imagery again!!

WHOSE AFRAID OF LITTLE OLD ME

👹YOU SHOULD BE 👹

Shots fired again at Scott Swift!! Let’s hear one more joke—they mocked her pain because they truly thought they could convince her she wasn’t gay 🫥

GODDDD 😫

Put narcotics into all of my songs—“a drug or other substance that affects mood or behavior and is consumed for nonmedical purposes, especially one sold illegally—a drug that relieves pain and induces drowsiness, stupor, or insensibility”

SHE SAID I HAVE TO USE MALE PRONOUNS AND FAKE REFERENCES TO MEN IN MY LYRICS SO YOU IDIOTS STAY STUPID AND HAPPY

and that’s why you’re still singing along 😎

Just WOW

Brilliant and Heartbreaking and RAW

🤍🤍🤍 We love you Girl 🤍🤍🤍

[whimsical-roasting]

“Coach Ted, how do you feel about group cohesion and dance breaks?”

thinking about random moments shared in the jamie tartt x psych major!reader fic i have in my head... just cute shit tbh

okay so the reader has been with the Richmond club for a solid few months, she’s a familiar face and friendly to the team but not super close with everybody, minus Colin and surprisingly,,, Jamie hehe

the team seems to be having a serious tie-streak going on, and they’re all kinda bummed by it

Ted’s obviously still Ted, unwavering winners mindset that basically means ‘do your best, give yourself a pat, shake it off, and repeat’ - with the addition of a smile ofc!

the reader has been doing readings for her org psych class and knows that raising group morale is necessary but also so so hard.

sometimes motivational speeches just don’t cut it yknow?? sometimes you gotta think outside of the box to fix the vibes and spread positivity

so there she is, standing in the coach’s office with a bluetooth speaker in her hand, nervously waiting for it to be her turn to speak

“Coach Ted,” she calls him in a manner that’s playful but still professional - he’s insisted on just Ted in the past and she’s complied but for serious conversations, she enjoys leading with a ‘subtle sense of professionalism’

“Coach Ted, how do you feel about group cohesion and dance breaks?” she asks, fiddling with the speaker in her hand

“Well darlin, I love a good flash mob. Gosh, those folks must keep in touch, right?” He directs his eyes to Beard, who peaks over his book and replies affirmingly, “a bond has been formed,” causing both you and Ted to smile

“Well, less flash mob but more like... a bi-weekly dance break?” she continues as Ted’s eyes land on her again. “I know the boys are bummed with the tie-streak and I was reading in my org psych textbook about the importance of autonomy in decorating our workspaces, and how group morale helps cohesion which’ll lead to better attitudes and hopefully better performance - not that our performance has been poor, it’s been great, I’m proud of the boys really! But, it sucks to see them bummed out...So maybe a twice-a-week-song-dance-break will lift spirits??” 

she’s rambling. she’s nervous!! it’s a good idea tbh but still, sharing means being vulnerable and the potential of getting rejected

Ted politely waits for her to finish, nodding along and then grins, “sounds wonderful darlin! Hey, maybe you can get the boys to give some song suggestions to help with the whole autonomy thing you mentioned.” 

she’s happy !! grinning as she steps out to the locker room, dragging out the whiteboard from the corner and scribbling in a lil corner of it

Jamie’s eyes follow her silently. truth be told, they followed her when she entered and disappeared into the coach’s office. but he smiles a lil seeing her grin at herself

when she’s done with the whiteboard, she calls for attention and lets the boys know to write down their suggestions, and she’ll choose two songs for the week randomly!! she emphasizes nervously that it should help according to her textbooks and Jamie is silently nodding, eyes drifting to her hands as she fiddles with the whiteboard marker

Dani is the first to speak, “pardon me, can it be Spanish songs too?” and she smiles really big, “anything you like!!” 

Isaac adds, “yea bruv, I fuck wit Bad Bunny” and there’s a wave of approving noises from the rest

SO, the plan has been implemented, and it’s frickin working!!! 

the boys always look forward to whose song is chosen - lots of rap, some taylor swift, Work Hard Play Hard makes them go nuts, some musical songs from Colin but it’s okay cause the lads are hyped over Hamilton 

Ted gets into it!! dancing!! Dani and Jan Maas share an imaginary mic!! it’s great, but Jamie’s favourite part is seeing her join them in the locker rooms for every dance break grooving to the music

one day SHE chooses the song... “Keep Your Head Up” by Andy Grammer cause the team seemed extra tired and bummed

everyone’s like ??? who chose this?? she’s like ‘me. I did.’

she’s trying to break the tension, so she takes her imaginary mic and goes to Ted, then Colin, then Sam, and soon everyone’s into it - just happily singing and dancing

she somehow ends up next to Jamie, shoulders bumping. she’s swaying as she faces him, playfully mouthing the lyrics to him as he smiles with a slight blush (not that she notices cause she’s blushing too)

they’re both dancing close to each other, and she lightly pokes his chin when the song goes, “you gotta keep your head up”, reaching up to pull down his headband at, “and you can let your hair down,” grinning at him when he’s like ‘hey!! :o... >:)’

the song ends, and they’re still laughing at each other, holding hands...a bit longer than they should tbh hehehe. Jamie loves her energy and kindness, it matches his goofiness and makes him wanna be a better person

but anyways!!! they pull away, hoping no one notices.. some do but don’t say anything

#jamie tartt x psych major!reader #jamie tartt x reader #ted lasso x reader #ted lasso #jamie tartt

[championleonsslut]

HII, i'm so sorry to be a bother but can i request some headcanons with leon having a famous s/o, like a singer or influencer? :000

I’ve been HYPED to do this ask for a while Tehe! You never disappoint anon!

Leon W/ a famous s/o

Female reader, quite fluffy all things considered! Reader is a singer

You, a very VERY famous Galarian singer (I’m talking Taylor Swift level famous) were of course, in the spotlight a lot. You have a massive fanbase, who practically worship your music. What you did not expect, is that the Galarian Champion secretly likes your music.

He sneaks into a few concerts, and developed a bit of a celebrity crush on you when he heard your voice. It was like a Siren’s call. He loved the glamorous outfits you wore, and how much passion you put into your music. He totally secretly stalks you on social media a bit.

You, on the other hand, like his work too. You have a Pokemon of your own who often is in concerts with you, a female Sylveon. You think he’s attractive, and a good battler, but you don’t know him.

You accidentally run into him one day after one of your shows, and are VERY surprised to find him there. He quickly compliments you on your work, and small talk pops up. You get kinda flirty and that leads to some numbers being exchanged.

After moving past the talking stage, he officially asks you out, and you could not be more delighted. You’re both very busy people, but make time for each other regardless. (Awwww)

Of course, you decide to keep your relationship very secret once you get together. Don’t need the press meddling in your lives even more, now do we?

Right from the get-go, Leon is absolutely the best boyfriend you’ve ever had. He is perfect in every single way, and you can always spot him in the VIP box at your shows. This leads to you writing songs about him, very discreetly though.

Once he hears your new album, the lyrics catch his attention. It doesn’t take long for him to put the pieces together. Most of your more romantic songs are DEFINITELY about him. It makes him blush and giggle when he figures it out.

“Are these songs about me?”

“Yes…”

“🥺”

You’re not just dating him for the money, you’re genuinely in love with him. And you blurt that out one night while you’re snuggled up in bed, and he couldn’t agree more.

After that, Leon drops the bomb in an interview about his girlfriend. (With your permission of course) it’s safe to say, everyone went B A N A N A S.

You guys get interviewed together, and more of the tea about your relationship is spilled. Almost immediately, you’re Galar’s hottest couple! There is a blog or two dedicated to the press sneaking photos of you together. The most popular ones are where you stand on your tip toes to kiss him. Leon agrees. They’re adorable.

People start to put the pieces together that some of your songs are about Leon, and lose their mind even more. You just giggle and watch as the chaos unfolds.

There’s fan art drawn of you guys, and each is more adorable than the last. Leon likes showing them to you. You get flustered each time.

Leon now gets to show off his pretty girlfriend at formal events. You like dressing up just for him, and it makes him nuts. Jewels, makeup, fancy dresses, the whole shibang.

Even four years into your relationship, and with the amount of songs you’ve written about him, people are still crazy about you guys together.

And of course, when they get word of the engagement… It gets even crazier.

#champion leon #pokemon leon #trainer leon #pokemon #champion leon x reader #pokemon leon x reader #anon ask #request #champion leon headcannons #pokemon leon headcannons

[judasgot-it]

a reader who ignores them after realizing they like them.. omg it’s so me. i’m the problem it’s me

BDUEGWUWH don't mention Taylor swift around me I have so much anguish because of her /j

But omg,,,, you are SO right, especially with some people like Dazai? He would go NUTS cause you know he would do anything for attention let's be sooooooo real

I feel like Dazai is a yandere idk I love him but he isn't the best guy let's be real xD

Cause he would KNOW and he loves the attention probably so you know he would just keep pestering you over and over just to annoy you. He wants your attention and don't deny him of it, he knows you want to give him it ;) He's horrible. You should probably run far far away.

I feel like this would also drive someone like Nikolai though mad cause he probably KNOWS how to get under your skin and wouldn't like your answer - like awww you're shy? TOO BAD !!

Nikolai would never make you admit it though. If anything if you ever say it out loud he would start to ignore you or even be mean, cause he's got severe emotional issues. He's like a situationship at it's worst. Dude doesn't know what he wants, he wants to be loved but if he actually got it? O lawd.

I love Jouno but like he would torture you if this happened like actually. C'mon. The dude would know before you even, and if you decided to ignore him, he would make your life hell.

He hates you. But he probably likes you, because he likes when people praise him. He would force you to tell him every part that you like about him. He's got a praise kink but god would he degrade you to hell and back for liking him.

These are just blurbs actually nothing substantial but...IDK I kinda wanna write Jouno once I get the time....mmm

#bsd x reader #dazai x reader #jouno x reader

[greghatecrimes]

PPTH Gang + What I Think They’d Order At Starbucks, brought to you in incredible and unnecessarily extra detail by a very tired barista!

House: Black eye (black coffee with two shots of espresso), adds his own cream and sugar very sparingly. Occasionally when he’s alone he orders a Caramel Ribbon Crunch frap (guilty pleasure).

Wilson: Grande hot latte with soy milk. He used to order the “skinny vanilla” (latte with skim milk and sugar free vanilla) but stopped because House made fun of him for ordering the white mom drink.

Cuddy: This woman will drink any kind of coffee she can get her hands on in the morning. Even really, really shitty coffee. She just needs something to get through the day. But if she’s got time for Starbucks, I know she’s absolutely getting a tall Brown Sugar Oat Milk Shaken Espresso with two extra shots of espresso (four total). (That is a lot of espresso for a small drink and she needs all of it). She looks so stressed out that the barista draws a smiley face or a star next to her name on the cup, or writes “have a great day!”

Cameron: The Taylor Swift latte. Grande skim latte with caramel. She’s a basic bitch but she knows what she likes, good for her! In the fall she’s 100% a pumpkin spice latte girl and she probably also has the date written on her calendar for when Peppermint Mochas come back in the winter. When asked her name: “It’s Allie, A-L-L-I-E. Thanks!” automatically spells it out to make the barista’s life 3x easier.

Chase: Cameron orders for him because Chase has no idea what the names for anything are. Also likes a good Peppermint Mocha around Christmas (Cameron got him hooked; he stops drinking them after the divorce). Rest of the year he goes for an Americano, iced or hot, with almond milk. His Starbucks name is Bob, which never fails to make Cameron laugh. (Now I’m imagining putting that order out and yelling “ICED AMERICANO FOR BOB!” into a busy cafe and Chase standing there cluelessly like “who? me?” until Cameron nudges him, and I’m laughing my ass off)

Foreman: Regular, plain ol’ black coffee, any kind of dark roast. He adds his own cream very liberally but isn’t a fan of sugar in his coffee.

Thirteen: I spent way too much time thinking of the perfect thing for her. If she just gets coffee at work, just regular decaf coffee is fine. The bitter taste wakes her up since there’s no caffeine. If she wants a nice coffee, I think she’d like a decaf Doppio (two shots of espresso) with a bit of almond milk, one pump of vanilla, and one pump of hazelnut. Hot or iced, but always decaf. Gently but firmly tells the barista to please make sure it’s decaf because she’s “caffeine intolerant” (not wholly a lie. Helps her avoid the caffeine jitters.) Never uses her real name, either gives a random one or just says “Thirteen, like the number” when asked for a name by the barista. Always leaves a tip when she has cash. Orders her drink iced at any time of year if she’s in the mood for it and gets harassed by House for it.

Kutner: Rotates between different superhero names for his Starbucks name (Tony Stark, Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Clint Barton, etc.). Taub wants to melt through the floor every time he gets coffee with Kutner and his order is called out. Kutner thinks it’s hilarious. I really feel like he would be happy with anything you give him, but I think his go to if he’s specifically at Starbucks would be a java chip frap despite the fact that Taub lectures him about it (if he’s gonna treat himself to expensive coffee it may as well taste good!!). Also RIP Kutner you would have loved the Dragon Drink so much (both for the badass name AND the fact that it’s purple)

Taub: Doesn’t go to Starbucks often, probably really only goes with Kutner. Just orders a regular latte or cappuccino. He says he doesn’t see the point of adding in all the flavors and stuff because it’ll just drown out the coffee. Might put some cinnamon on top if there’s a shaker of it on the condiment bar. Would add cinnamon or nutmeg at home if he has the luxury of having a late morning and making his own coffee.

Bonus! Amber: Drinks iced coffee in the middle of a blizzard. Could also down shots of espresso like they’re tequila. The most intense bitch. Would be very visibly tense or stressed when ordering but as soon as her order’s done she’d thank the barista pretty genuinely. Go-to order is a cinnamon dolce latte, no whip but keep the cinnamon dolce powder.

#ppth starbucks run #i did not need to go this hard but i did this to procrastinate doing stressful things so it was fun and worth it #there’s so much in here that makes ME laugh as a barista but that no one else will probably find funny. rip lmaooo #headcanons #greg house #james wilson #lisa cuddy #allison cameron #robert chase #eric foreman #remy thirteen hadley #lawrence kutner #chris taub #amber volakis #house md

[joesalw]

I have a personal theory about why Swifties are so obsessed with the TK relationship, if somebody else has already brought this up please feel free to ignore.

I’ve been a Swiftie almost since the beginning and fans have always been weirdly obsessed with her relationships. I’m a little embarrassed that I only realized this year how much her and her team feed into that parasocial speculation. A year ago, I probably would have sworn that she’s just the victim of intrusive and sexist media, but it’s been a long year. I’ve never seen anything like the obsession with the Tayvis relationship , not even with Harry Styles or Tom Hiddleston. “Regular” Swifties are making Kaylors look sane right now. Taylor’s team is definitely pushing this narrative on the public but I really believe that a lot of the intense fan stuff is happening organically and I think I know why.

I can’t count how many social media posts I’ve seen where someone has a picture of Travis at the KC eras tour in the VIP tent and then a picture in Brazil with some kind of caption about how now he gets to be in the family tent or whatever. Part of the Tayvis narrative they’ve both pushed is that TK wanted to give her a friendship bracelet and his number but she was too busy so he went on his podcast and said he wanted to meet her (I think that’s the order of events) and then she reached out to him.

Part of how Taylor has kept the parasocial relationship with her fans alive is by sparingly granting access to certain fans who are worthy enough. We saw that with secret sessions, liking and commenting on tumblr posts and then TikToks. She’s created a culture where if fans are loyal (fyi she’s used that word a lot lately), obsessed with her, and buy her merch then she might interact with them. This dynamic really feeds some people’s obsession. I remember when TS was on tumblr, people would go nuts when her little dot was green and all the drama about certain people re blogging posts for her to notice and who would get a “Taylor like.” I’m only now realizing how ingenious and cynical this is as a marketing strategy.

But anyway, the Tayvis narrative is every hardcore Swifties dream. He GOT NOTICED BY TAYLOR OMG! Essentially, he’s living their dream. It’s almost like self insert fan fiction for them.

Exactly, noticing fans who buy her stuff is a part of their marketing strategy, it encourages swifties to post about her more because everybody wants a notice from taylor swift to put it in their bio. But also, I think it’s not always her liking these stuff. Sometimes her team does that on her part too.

#anti taylor swift #swifties dni

[dreamy625]

Just keep dancing like we're twenty-two - one-shot

(Did I just use a Taylor Swift lyric for a title? Yes I did. I feel dirty.)

1983 and the Terror Twins, on a break between US dates of the Pyromania tour, are on a night out

Words: 2495

Content: Casual drinking, swearing

-----------------------------

“‘Ere, my mate thinks you’re fucking gorgeous”

“Oh does he? And who’s your mate?”

The forthright young man gestured behind him at another, also blond, but taller and skinnier and with considerably less swagger. When he realised he was being looked at, the second man ducked his head and stared fixedly at the floor.

“Cute,” thought Belinda, but she can’t be doing with shy, too much work for just one night. “Yeah, I don’t think so. But,” she reached out and smoothed down Phil’s collar where it had flicked up on one side, trailing her hand down the front of his shirt, “if you’re looking for some company this evening…? I just looove your accent…” She fluttered her eyelashes coquettishly. 

“I, um, I don’t… not that I wouldn’t want… but you know… my mate… I can’t leave him on his own y’see.”

“Ah well, your loss, sweetie.” She patted him on the head and strode off to look for a more susceptible prospect.

And that was the fifth strikeout of the evening; the two women they’d danced with early on had turned out to have husbands waiting at home; the group at the bar were on a hen night and the bride unconvinced by Phil’s argument that she should take this one last chance to bag an englishman; the girl Steve had bought a drink for had just been dumped by her boyfriend and cried at him for 45 minutes until he asked the barman to call her a cab; and a glamorous blonde whose stiletto heels made her about six inches taller than Phil had just looked him up and down and said ‘no’ before he even opened his mouth! After this latest failure, they retreated to a table beside the dancefloor to soothe their bruised egos with more vodka, and maybe reconsider their strategy. 

“I promised I’d get you laid for your birthday and I’m standing by that. Though at this rate I’m going to have to shag you myself!”

“Thanks for the offer, mate, but you’re not really my type. I think we just have to face the truth, I’m unfuckable.”

“Bollocks, I’ve seen loads of girls sneaking out of your room. Unless you’ve just been playing Scrabble with them in there?”

“Not loads, and that’s different, that’s after shows. They want to get with the guy they watched on stage. When it’s just this,” he gestured down at himself, “they’re not interested.”

“You’ve just got to put yourself out there. It’s a numbers game - if you ask enough, one of ‘em’s gotta say yes. Basic statistics innit!”

“Maybe I don’t want just anyone who’ll have me.”

“Then that’s your problem; it’s not your ugly mug, it’s your attitude - too picky.” He scanned the club and then tilted his head in the direction of a couple of girls carrying brightly coloured drinks and weaving through the tables in search of somewhere to sit. “What about those two? A redhead, I know they’re your favourite.”

Steve looked, with only moderate enthusiasm. “Not bad. I do like her hair. Go on then, do your thing.”

“Alright.” He rubbed his hands together. “But you’ve got to make some effort. At least smile - all the birds go nuts for the Clark smile!”

The owner of the ‘Clark smile’ rolled his eyes but obligingly pasted on what he hoped was a friendly and appealing grin.

Phil stepped into the path of the two wandering women and, dialling his chirpy cockney persona up to maximum, waylaid them with, “Ladies, if you’d be so kind as to join us, you’d be makin’ two lonely travellers in your great country very ‘appy.”

The two women exchanged sidelong glances, and when the redhead opened her mouth, ‘nah, you’re alright, mate’ came out in an equally strong East London accent.

Phil gaped at them - he was relying on American girls swooning in the face of British charm and had no back-up plan for unexpectedly encountering two of his fellow countrywomen, so all he could do was watch as they carried on their way, giggling. 

Steve shook his head, the enticing smile turning into a grimace. “This is getting embarrassing.” He drained the last of his drink and dropped the glass back on the table with a clunk. “I’m going for a piss.”

When he got back, Phil was talking to a petite black woman in a bright blue dress at the bar and, miracle of miracles, she actually seemed to be talking back. 

“Yep, it’s definitely me that’s the problem,” he muttered under his breath. “He’s sodding Erol Flynn when I’m not there cramping his style.” He was highly tempted just to go back to the hotel and leave his Twin to it, but before he could make the move, Phil spotted him and waved him over.

“This is my mate I was telling you about; Steve, meet Denise, and this is Suzy.”

A woman Steve hadn’t noticed before, slouching against the bar, lifted her hand in a lacklustre greeting. She was tall and a little mousey in comparison with her brightly-attired friend, and would be pretty enough if she didn’t look quite so grumpy. She would be the designated 'have you got a friend for my pal who's too inept to find someone himself' then. Oh well, better than playing gooseberry again - frequently Steve's fate on nights out with Phil.

Small talk was not Steve’s forte, and the best he could manage was essentially ‘what’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?’.

“So, err, what brings you and your friend here tonight?”

“We were supposed to have dates, but they stood us up.” She glared at Steve who, as a representative of the male sex, was apparently at least partially to blame for this slight.

“Oh…sorry…” Not a great start. “They must be total idiots then,” he declared in a hopeful stab at gallantry. 

“Or we are, to have agreed to it in the first place,” she muttered, still frowning. 

Steve waved to the barman and ordered doubles of everything for everyone, hoping that alcohol would serve as social lubricant. After a fortifying gulp of his vodka and orange, he tried again.

"How do you and… Denise was it? Know each other?"

"We're roommates. We were at college together and decided to stay and get jobs after we graduated."

"What do you do now?"

"I'm a techie at the Paramount; Denise is a junior buyer at Nordstrom's. Much more glamorous."

"The Paramount? The theatre?"

"You know it?"

"I think we played there last time we were here. We're… in a band," he added offhandedly. 

"Your friend said. I wasn't sure I believed him; a lot of guys say they're in a band. If they think it's going to impress a girl."

"Oh. Well I don’t know about that, but we actually are."

"Is it one I'll have heard of?"

"Maybe. Def Leppard?" She looked blank so he half-sang, "Photograph… I don’t want your photograph…" and made some drrng drring noises with accompanying mime.

"Oh, yeah, I might have heard that on the radio. Not really my thing though, sorry."

Crestfallen, Steve didn't really have a comeback for that. He took a long swallow of his drink and looked across to where Phil was whispering into Denise's ear, something funny apparently given the giggling response. "Well they seem to be getting along nicely," he observed.

"Yeah. Sorry you're stuck with me."

"Not at all, nowhere I'd rather be."

"That's sweet of you, but you don't have to pretend. I'm always the consolation prize; I mean look at her, she’s so gorgeous, and tiny, and peppy, and I’m just this great galumphing giraffe next to her.”

“No, you’re very… err…” he floundered, looking for a word that was flattering but not patronising, “...elegant.” She rolled her eyes. “And you’re not that tall.” He straightened up and stepped nearer - her forehead was level with his eyes. “See,” he said, putting both hands on her waist, “perfect height! …For… dancing…?” he hazarded, suddenly realising just how up close and personal he had got. “Err, would you… like to?”

For a moment it looked like she was going to turn him down, but when a glance along the bar revealed the other two gazing into each other's eyes and clearly about ten seconds from sucking face, she acquiesced with a halfhearted ‘oh alright then’. 

Now Steve was no dancer but, since his feeble attempts at flirtatious chitchat had entirely failed, he had decided to deploy his only other weapon - making an idiot of himself in the hopes of at least raising a smile. It was a risky strategy, with embarrassment followed by a speedy retreat as likely a reaction as laughter, but at this point he had no other options and was just drunk enough to deem it worth a go. And obligingly the DJ was playing Prince so, having led them far enough into the dancing throng that he wouldn’t be a spectacle to everyone watching from the bar, he busted out his best, most exaggerated, hip-popping, shoulder-shimmying moves. For about twenty seconds Suzy just stood there staring wide-eyed as he threw himself around, then she shrugged and, to Steve’s delight, launched into a routine of her own that suggested she might have seen a few too many John Travolta movies! After bouncing and gyrating through three songs, to the increasing irritation of their fellow dancers who had to try and keep out of the way of Steve’s flailing arms, the DJ put on a smoochier number and Steve held out his hand and twirled his partner into a more typical slow dance hold. She leaned into him, out of breath but grinning.

“You are crazy!” she panted.

“Look who’s talking, Ginger Rogers!”

Looking over Steve's shoulder, she raised her eyebrows as she spotted their two friends still by the bar but now entwined like amorous octopuses. "I think it might be time for us all to get out of here, before those two commit an act of public indecency!"

Steve let himself be pulled off the dancefloor, feeling that this evening might be working out okay after all.

The boys' oh so classy hotel, with nylon bedspreads and perpetually dripping shower, appealed to precisely no one, so the group left the club for the short walk to the girls' downtown apartment. Progress to their destination was slowed by Phil and Denise's apparent need to have at least three body parts in contact at all times, and the other two opted to walk on the opposite side of the street, pausing at each corner for the lovers to catch up. Conversation flowed more easily now, Steve sharing stories of life on the road and Suzy detailing the backstage antics of the various bands who'd played at the theatre. When Steve let slip that it was his birthday, Suzy was a little sad to learn that, being so far from home, he hadn’t really done anything to celebrate it, just the few cards that had managed to make it to the right hotel on time and this night out with Phil.

“Oh no, I don’t think we’ve even got any cake. I could stick a candle in a packet of cookies if you like?”

“Mmm, burning plastic is so festive!”

“You're supposed to blow it out before it starts a fire, dumbass.”

“Ohh, that’s what I’ve been doing wrong!”

They stopped to wait for the dawdlers and Suzy asked, “There must be something nice I can give you for your birthday?” 

The way she said it - he wasn’t sure if he was being flirted with. “What did you have in mind?” he asked lightly, not presuming. But she just gave him a sideways smile and started walking again.

"So, coffee?" Suzy asked when they entered the small two-bedroom walk-up. But the other couple were practically clawing each other's clothes off in the hall and vanished into Denise's bedroom without even replying.

“I guess just me then,” replied Steve, feeling suddenly shy again now that the evening was rapidly approaching the point where he would need to make some kind of move. That was the advantage of the groupies - even if those girls weren’t necessarily the type he would have gone for in the regular non-showbiz world, they made most of the running and he didn’t have to find anything clever or suave to say beyond ‘ullo in his apparently adorable British accent. Real girls were harder and he was out of practice.

“Livingroom’s through there,” she told him, “make yourself comfortable.”

Taking cups out of the cupboard, Suzy reconsidered her original intention to maybe get Steve’s number and then send him on his way. Hook-ups weren’t really her thing, and the guys were only in town for another few days before disappearing to the other end of the country but… he was pretty cute, and funny, and it would be better than trying to avoid listening to the other two go at it all night through the wall. While the coffeemaker dripped, she used the darkened window as a mirror to fluff up her hair and wipe any stray mascara from under her eyes. Before picking up the two cups, she rearranged her top so it draped enticingly over one shoulder and added a swish to her walk as she re-entered the living room. However, she quickly realised that her feminine wiles would be wasted - their intended recipient was fast asleep on the couch. Briefly she considered waking him, but he looked so peaceful, and it was nearly 2am. She took the coffees back to the kitchen and poured both of them down the sink - no point being awake if there was no one to play with. She found a blanket and laid it gently over the sleeping man. 

“Happy birthday, sweetheart,” she murmured, and kissed him on the cheek. 

-----------------------------

Epilogue:

When Steve opened his eyes the next morning, it took him a minute or so to work out where he was - oh yeah, those two girls from the nightclub. Ah, but he was on a sofa and, he checked, fully dressed, so clearly whatever seduction technique he'd attempted had been rebuffed. 

“Morning, sunshine!”

A pretty girl with mussed-up hair and mile-long legs appearing from the bottom of a John Denver t-shirt was smiling at him. He smiled back while the words ‘Sarah… Samantha… Suzy!’ crawled through his befuddled brain.

“Do you want your birthday present?” She held out a toothbrush, new and still in its packaging. 

“But it’s not my birthday anymore.”

“Pretend. Bathroom’s second door on the left down the hall.”

Not awake enough to argue, Steve took it and shambled to the bathroom. When he reemerged, feeling a bit more with it after peeing, brushing his teeth, and washing his face with cold water, Suzy was leaning in the doorway of the bedroom opposite.

“Nice t-shirt,” he teased.

“Just get in here before I change my mind, birthday boy.”

#steve clark #phil collen #steve clark fanfic #steve clark fanfiction #def leppard fanfic #def leppard fanfiction #birthday fic #happy birthday stevie

[canirove]

Bluebell | Chapter 12

Author's note: Next week there won't be new chapters of Bluebell because I will be posting something special for Christmas 👀 But we'll be back ready for the New Year 😁

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"Do you seriously need to go to the hospital now? It is snowing!"

"That's what the doctor said, mum. I can't wait."

"And can't Rúben take you?"

"He already told you he was busy, that he had family business to attend to."

He said it this morning, when he tried to sneak out without being seen, but my mum caught him. Mainly because she had gone into my room last night, and saw us sleeping together.

"But I don't trust calling a taxi. What about Mason?"

"He has his whole family at home with him, he probably is busy too."

And it's more than likely that the rumour about me and Rúben leaving together last night, already reached him. Lindsey texted me about it early in the morning, so if her mother knows...

"And are you sure they'll attend you today? It's Christmas Eve!"

"I'm going in as an emergency. They are always open for that."

"I just... Can't you wait a bit longer?" she insists.

"I've already waited long enough, mum. But what if I call Dean? The mechanic? He has a 4x4, knows the area, and my father used to like him a lot according to what I've been told. I'll be safe with him."

"Ok, fine. But I still think you should wait until the snow stops."

"Urgh" I say, rolling my eyes.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"Mum, that's Dean. I'm leaving!"

"Did you charge your phone?" she asks.

"Yes, mum. My phone is charged, and I have snacks and a water bottle with me. I'll be fine."

"Call me when you arrive, ok?"

"I will. Love you, mum" I say before going outside and running towards the car, snow all around me.

"You still have some snowflakes on your hair."

"Mason?" I say, finally looking up. I was so focused on running and not slipping, and then making sure I didn't get the inside the car covered in snow, that I hadn't looked at the person who was driving. "Why are you here? Where is Dean?"

"He had some last minute things to do, and gave me a call, asked me if I would take you to the hospital. What happened?"

"I may have broken my finger" I say, showing it to him.

"So rude, put that down" he chuckles. Because it was my middle finger the one that got crushed. "Do you mind that it is me driving you?"

"No, no, it's fine. Do you mind driving me?"

"I actually am glad to leave the house. They are driving me nuts."

"Too used to living alone and do whatever you want?"

"Exactly. You know how much I love walking around the house wearing just my underwear, and that is over now."

"Poor you" I say with a teasing smile.

"Indeed" he replies, also smiling. "Should we go before this gets worst?"

"Yeah, we should. I don't want my mum to worry more than she already is. Can I put some music?"

"Go ahead" he says, starting to drive.

"Her? Again?" I say when Taylor Swift starts playing. "Mason, is there anything you would like to share with the class?"

"Ok, fine. I like her music."

"Wow... Just... Wow. And you are telling me this on Christmas Eve."

"Merry Christmas" he says with that smile that is all dimples.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"So you are telling me... That you actually broke your finger... With a bin's lid?" Mason laughs.

"It was one of the big ones, ok? The heavy ones. And Rúben scared me because you people in this town love doing it, and..."

"Rúben" he scoffs. "Why didn't he come here with you? It was his fault."

"He was busy with some family stuff."

"Are you back together?"

"What? No. I'm single. Completely. Dixie is the only man in my life right now."

"The rumour about you getting back together is already out, tho. They saw you last night."

"Yeah, well. They are wrong this time."

"Good" Mason says while I follow him to the car.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"Do you think we'll be back home before it gets dark?" I ask Mason. The snow hasn't stopped, and the road is getting worse and worse, making us go very slow.

"I don't know" he says as his phone starts ringing. "Can you check who it is?"

"Tom."

"Put the speaker."

"Mase, hi" Tom says over the phone.

"Hello, bro. What's up?"

"I was told that you are out of town? Went to the hospital with Miss Daisy?"

"You too, Tom?" I say.

"Oh, hi there. Sorry. Anyway, where are you? Are you ok?"

"She's ok, just a broken finger courtesy of our Mayor."

"What?"

"It's a long story" I say, giving Mason a murderous look.

"Anyway, I guess you guys still are in the car, right?"

"Yep."

"Well, we've had to close the road because of all the snow, we are waiting for the snowplough. So until then, you can't come in."

"We can't? What are we supposed to do then?" I ask.

"I have an idea" Mason says. "Tom, give us a call when the road is clean."

"I will. Take care, guys" Tom says, hanging up.

"What are we going to do?"

"Just trust me, ok?" Mason says.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"Won't we be bothering him?"

"For the millionth time... No, we won't" Mason says, rolling his eyes. Turns out that we were close to Mr. James farm, and Mason decided to pay him a visit and wait there until the road is clean. The man lives alone, so hopefully he'll be happy to have some company on Christmas Eve.

"Oh, hello you two" Mr. James says when he opens the door. "What are you doing here?"

"Hiding from the snow. Would you mind if we come in?" Mason asks.

"Of course not! Come, come."

"Thank you for letting us stay here, Mr. James" I say, sitting next to the fire.

"My pleasure. I don't have much to offer you on a night like this, just some chicken with potatoes on the oven."

"That sounds like heaven right now." My chocolate bars were good, but I need real food right now.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"Still no news from Tom?"

"Nope" Mason says.

"You can always stay here for the night. Though you'll have to share a bed, I only have one clean and ready" Mr. James says, trying to hide a smile.

"We'll wait a bit longer" I say.

"Mason, why don't you come with me so I can show you which one it is? I'm going to bed myself."

"Yes, of course. Keep an eye on the phone" he says, handing it to me.

"I will. Good night, Mr. James. And thank you for everything."

"My pleasure" he says before disappearing with Mason.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"You are falling sleep."

"I'm fine" I say, changing my position on the sofa, my back starting to ache.

"Why don't we wait on the room? The bed looked so comfy."

"We aren't gonna do anything, you've been warned."

"I can think with other part of my body that aren’t my dick, you know?" he says. "Are you coming or not?"

"I guess, yes" I say as I get up, all my muscles already thanking me for it.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━        

"I had forgotten that your feet always are freezing cold, Mason."

"Sorry" he chuckles. "But I'm wearing socks."

"Doesn't feel like it."

"You know, since it looks like we are gonna spend the night here... Can we... You know..."

"I told you nothing was going to happen."

"Sex no, I know. But cuddling?" he says, giving me those puppy eyes I can't say no to.

"Fine" I say while hugging him with one arm and one leg, just like we used to do all the time when we were together.

"I've missed this" he says while playing with my hair. If I was a cat, I would definitely be purring right now.

"Me too" I say, my eyes starting to close.

#mason mount #ruben dias #mason mount x reader #ruben dias x reader #mason mount fanfic #ruben dias fanfic #mason mount imagine #ruben dias imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

[musicfordinner]

He absolutely did that shit.

Listen there are so many things I want to talk about in relation to this story and I’m sure everything will be spoken on and spoken about in the coming year.… however, the most important thing that I’m taking away from this is a lesson I hope younger women learn by looking at these artists. It is something that I’m glad that I learned when I was younger and I thank God every day that things didn’t turn out worse for me.

Dating older men ain’t shit — it’s for the birds. Most older men dating younger women are insane. Absolutely fucking nuts. They’re predatory. They can’t stand against the women in their age group because that would force them to take responsibility for their actions. That would force them to think logically about their behaviour. That would force them to not be able to hide. Not to say women they’re age aren’t experiencing abuse, but there’s a level of “getting away with it” that older men think they’re going to be able to do because the woman is much younger and is unsure of herself.

All of this story and the abuse that Cassie sustained at the hands of Diddy is fucking monstrous. I actually was discussing it with my father last night and we watched On the Record and talked about how insane power hungry men can get and he was like yeah: Russell Simmons is a fucking rapist.

I think it’s really telling when people wanna date teenagers or people who are like one or two years out of being in high school or the new, young upstart at their business or company. It always reeks of desperation and power imbalances. You know its generally because they’re trying to exact a level of control over somebody. Throwing in some HP references: those niggas are death eaters. They’re literally dementors and they’re absolutely insane. They get off on domination and control.

I’m so glad that there’s so many fucking warrior women coming out to speak about their insane relationships that they had with older men in the public eye when they were very very young.

I loved Taylor Swift for writing about these predators. I love Demi for doing it. It’s like when women hit 30 and realize the fucking gag, they pull that pen out and holy shit I can’t wait for the exposure. It’s what’s changing and shifting the landscape right now in music. We can barely listen to fucking male rappers at the moment. Who is bitches and who are the hoes you speak of sir? Listen, a hex on all their houses. I can’t wait to see Beyoncé in her 70s/80s write that memoir, I’m sure she’d talk about the grooming and the violence she sustained with Jay, even though in a somewhat typical Black family tradition, they’re staying together. He claims he learned his lesson. I guess Lemonade must have taught him some shit as we heard on 4:44. Or he figures it’s cheaper to keep her. Whatever, that memoir is finna be fire.

Circling back — as a young girl you are not fully aware of what’s transpiring in these age-gap relationships, until it’s too late. It just feels like you’re getting special attention from someone to look up to. Popular decorum dictates that there is the campfire rule that if you’re dating a younger girl or a younger guy you’re supposed to leave them in a better state than you found them, but that’s not usually the case with famous and rich men. They’re cheap. They’re abusive. They may want you to engage in acts you’re not comfortable with because you don’t hold the upper hand and more times can’t fully stand on your own yet. Maybe you’re not as notable or popular or you’re new on the scene and most times they hope: less experienced. If you look at a relationship like Quavo and Saweetie’s, they can be violent jealous liars that act one way for the cameras and another when you’re trapped in an elevator with them fighting and forgetting that there are security cameras around. If you’re someone like Diddy, you’re paying 50K for the security camera footage so that the public doesn’t see you Ray Rice-ing your girlfriend in the building. It’s fucking nuts. AND THEN on top of that — they want you to have sex with young studs for their voyeuristic pleasure because they probably can’t get their dick up enough to develop a meaningful, healthy, sexual relationship with you. Lastly, if you’re a Black woman, shade be damned, you could be a Cassie, or a Serena, or anyone who has had to deal with domestic terrorism from your community and you leave the community and marry a non-black man (not to say that outsiders won’t abuse you either becauseeee whew chile), then they (said men in your community) want to cry racism. It’s stupid. Everything sucks. BUT the major take away is that older men are particularly vile because they want to rob you of your youth, your popularity, and your talent because they’re fucking vultures. See: Drew Dixon, Sil Lai Abrams, Anita Hill, etc etc etc.

A former coworker of mine died this past week. It is a challenge to mourn for him because he was an abuser, he was violent to young women, women that are my friends that he worked with. He was inappropriate. He was a cheater. He was older than us all. He cheated on his wife constantly. She more than likely knew. He was vile. He put vulnerable people in fucking awful situations that he will have to pay his dues to the creator for. These men are everywhere.

When I worked for another company, music-related, there was a man there who sexually harassed every young woman that worked there, including me. We reported it/him. I fucking left that job before he did. Him and his cronies both engaged in that behaviour. Picture that. You’re trying to work and get your cheque and these folks stay being inappropriate. He’s probably dead now too and honestly, the world is probably a better place for it.

I remember the first time I saw the movie an education and was like FUCK— no comment about whether or not this happened to me or other girls I knew. But Jesus. It’s such a common scenario there is movie after movie after movie about shit like it. Honestly, most women watching this Cassie/Diddy scenario play out probably can’t wait for these dudes to get the fuck outta here. There’s a reason these folks never marry and just replace one young girl with another. It’s sad. But it’s time for them to get the fuck outta here. Not to mention his poor business practices, alleged murder of individuals, the Shyne situation and the Mase situation. They’re even doing men dirty in these scenarios. It’s a level of toxicity that has known no boundary. I can’t wait for Diddy to get CAUGHT THE FUCK UP.

More to read:

#chantel’s sound diary #diddy #cassie ventura #music diary #music journal #music nerds #music nerd #music dreams #surviving diddy

[a-moth-to-the-light]

Most-Listened of October 2023

(via stats.fm/spotistats)

[last month]

What a sleepy month... as in, I've been sleepy and haven't had much interest in new releases. (Except IVE. I have been listening to wayyyyyy too much IVE.) Hopefully I'll have some energy back in time for the RV album, and to really enjoy the Weeekly comeback (finally!!!) that just happened!

1. Lux Aurumque -- Eric Whitacre, Eric Whitacre Singers

Eric Whitacre (and a song from the same album as the last one, too??) on the top of the list two months in a row! Deserved. This is basically the same song as "Sleep" for me, but they both have just so much emotional value so I don't really mind!!

2. Invisible String -- Taylor Swift

This ended up being a theme song for my big creative writing project this month--I really don't think I've gone a day without listening to it, and I'm still not tired of that soft guitar. It’s so perfectly cozy :)

3. Either Way -- IVE

Another theme song for the writing project--I love how this song proves that sounding ‘gray’ doesn't have to be unappealing. If you liked this, you’ll probably like Dvwn’s “Yeonnam-dong”!

4. Siren -- Taeyeon

I hate that this song perfectly captured my mood for more than half of October, but thank the gods I had a song that described that mood perfectly!! If I’m stuck feeling stressed and glum (a REALLY weird combo), at least I have Taeyeon to keep me company :)

5. Chili -- Hwasa

This was GREAT. I mean it’s me, so I'll listen to Hwasa sing anything, but this instrumental really hits, especially compared to the abomination of an instrumental that was "I Love My Body". With the killer combination of Hwasa & the beat, “Chili” was an instant 'leave on repeat until I can no longer physically stand it' classic.

6. Here We Go Again -- Jini

I talked about this album, right? It carried my month!! It's not my favorite of the year--there are definitely some really messy parts (that I think will get worked out in Jini’s discography over time)--but the commitment to making catchy, energetic songs that feel mature but still youthful, and to keeping a consistent aesthetic throughout the album, is something I really appreciate. This is my favorite song from it--Jini does a great job with such a fun chorus! Can I call this my favorite NMIXX song?

7. Bad Reputation -- Jini

MORE JINI !!! The way the piano in the instrumental reminds me of Katy Perry's "Roar" is unfortunate, but "Bad Reputation" is too genuinely sweet for me not to enjoy. I LOVE TOO LITTLE JUST A LITTLE TOO MUCH <3

8. Thursday's Child Has Far To Go -- TXT

Sorry, new TXT album. I'm happy with my comfort song!!

9. Psycho -- Smyang Piano

Writing project soundtrack! This has been on one of my favorite lofi mixes for forever, but I never bothered to seek it out on its own until this month--I'm so glad I did!

10. Teenage Dream -- Olivia Rodrigo

Writing project soundtrack! A solid 3/5 for good atmosphere + some standout lyrics!

11. Quimera -- Alba Reche

One of my favorite songs of all time, here to make the cold-season days a little bit softer, as it always does. At this point, "Quimera" is a seasonal tradition for me.

12. Biriken -- Creepy Nuts

Creepy Nuts!!! Okay, so… I don't enjoy this song, like, at all, but I keep finding myself drawn to just how intensely it makes me feel. I find it so viscerally terrifying and unpleasant that it's much more compelling than a lot of other songs this month! And I think that's what really made me a fan of Creepy Nuts in the first place--I find their music so interesting, even when it isn't pleasant. I can’t look away, and that’s what happened with “Biriken” this month.

13. Mr. Blue Sky -- On The Rocks

This a cappella arrangement is so glorious. Like oh my GOD if I still did arranging, I would be taking notes on every second of this. (I'm still probably taking subconscious notes, anyway, considering how many times I've listened to it this month.)

14. Pink Venom -- Blackpink

I really don't remember listening to this one that much? But I do love it--it's my takeout cheeseburger of songs, and it's always a good fast-food meal.

15. Big It Up -- Ailee

This song is fine! I like it a LOT more than the title track, at least.

Five-Star Songs This Month:

Chili -- Hwasa (yep this is back! favorite release of the month, sorry IVE & Sunmi I STILL LOVE Y'ALL I PROMISE)

Holy Moly -- IVE (had me from the moment that low drum kicked in. even the weird glitch sound in the chorus doesn't faze me anymore!!)

Wonderland -- Aimer (okay this is late. i've loved the walpurgis album since it came out, but i didn't appreciate this song specifically until a walk a few weeks ago--and now it feels like a crime not to give it five stars.)

Dalala -- Yuju (can't believe i missed this when it came out?? this is my "off the record." yuju makes every song feel so high-class, so impeccably put-together, just by being on it.)

#honorable mention for me finally liking the jihyo album this month ? #also can you tell i hate the cold #being cold is one of my major emotional crisis-causers #hence all the comforting music i need to get me through it lol #music chats

[fathomlessbabbling]

Smile, a Charak RPF fic, Chapter 5.

This is a work of RPF. If you are uncomfortable with this kind of fiction, I encourage you not to read.

A03 link here

The rest of the night went by without issue as Tarak, Ram, and their now good friend Tomas showed them a wonderful restaurant and a nice place to relax with a few drinks. Tarak’s admission to himself in the changing room was enough to ease his mind of the fear he had harbored in his chest over the last few days. The more Tarak pondered about it, this worry that weighed so heavily on him had truly been with him for much longer but only presented itself when RRR wrapped filming, and the Awards tour had finished. Tarak was in a better place mentally to put that aside and enjoy his night with his new friend and his… crush? He was still trying to think of how to identify Ram now that he admitted that the connection he felt was deeper than the ‘best friend’ title could signify.

Tarak raised his glass of bourbon on the rocks in a toast. “Let us cheers our newfound wonderful friend Tomas. Long may he know that haters gonna hate, hate, hate-” As much as Tarak wanted to finish singing the Taylor Swift song with his toast, Tomas’s groan made him let out a deep husky laugh.

“Ugh. Why do you do this to me? That song drives me nuts!” Tomas whined with a smile on his face and his head in his hands.

“Welcome to being friends with Tarak. This is the man who, when we were on stage promoting RRR, reached over and pinched me in the side as I was complimenting him on his professionalism! ” Ram proclaimed with a large grin on his face. He sat with his arm over the back of Tarak’s chair and giggled as Tarak recalled the memory and laughed even harder.

“I remember that! Jakanna just laughed and said it was like working with children!” Tarak continued to snicker to himself.

“I can definitely see why,” Tomas quipped as he joined in the laughter.

As the laughter died down, Tarak actually held his glass up for a toast, “Seriously, though. Thank you, Tomas, for being wonderful, showing us clowns around town, and helping us on a fantastic first day in beautiful Los Angeles.”

Ram clinked his glass of vodka soda against Tarak’s, “I’ll happily drink to that.”

Tomas sheepishly smiled and joined in the toast, “Here’s to two of the most fun people I’ve ever had the pleasure of showing around the neighborhood.”

The three men sipped their drinks in celebration. Ram slowly rose from his seat as they continued their conversation, “I have to go use the facilities. Don’t get too drunk while I’m gone.”

Tarak held up his glass that was once filled with bourbon but now barely had any left, “I don’t know if I can keep that promise, baby.”

Tomas almost spat his drink out. “What did you just say?”

Tarak felt a wide grin spread across his face, and his cheeks flush, “Baby. I call him baby.” He then immediately started to laugh at how that must sound.

Ram tried his best to hold his giggles back as he spoke. “And I call him baby back. Baby one and baby two.”

Once again, the three laughed before Ram finally started moving towards the bathroom, leaving Tarak and Tomas alone at the table. As the laughter died down a little, Tomas looked to Tarak with an appraising look.

“How are you doing? Since our talk earlier, that is?” Tomas asked with genuine care in his tone of voice.

Tarak took a moment to think, but his smile didn’t fade as he nodded. “I’m doing much better, I think. It is strange to admit to yourself that you may love outside the norms you were taught as a child. It may take time to grasp it fully, but I am happy,” Tarak smiled wider, “I am happy to have been able to understand something about myself that I thought was a defect or something similar. In truth, I am just glad to have this connection to Charan.”

Tomas’ eyes squinted as he smiled, raising his glass to Tarak. “To understanding ourselves.”

Tarak nodded, clinked his glass against Tomas’, and sipped the bourbon, enjoying the heat after he swallowed. “We should probably cut ourselves off. We have to be up early for that lunch tomorrow.”

Tomas nodded, “Not a bad plan. I’ll take care of the bill,”

Before Tomas could protest, Tarak waved down the server who had brought them their drinks and presented his card for payment. “Thank you so much for everything. I will close out all three of our tabs.”

Tomas’ face went from shock to a faux grumpy face that made Tarak laugh.

“Rude.” Tarak laughed as that was the only word to come out of Tomas.

The black SUV pulled up to the hotel doors, and Tomas looked into the backseat at Ram and Tarak, both having the sway of someone with a nice alcohol buzz. Before speaking, he inwardly thanked himself for only having one drink because this sight was entertaining.

“Alright, gentleman. We have reached our destination. I will be back tomorrow morning at eleven to pick you guys up so you can meet with Kevin. Go get some good sleep!”

Tarak leaned forward and squeezed Tomas’ shoulder, “Thank you for a wonderful day, Tomas. Go home to your Mateo! Tell him Tarak says hello!” He then climbed out of the SUV as Ram also said his goodbyes.

As the two of them watched the SUV pull away, they both waved with a twinkle in their eyes as the drinks they had earlier hit a little harder than they had planned. The two men turned and looked at each other and couldn’t help but stand and giggle for a moment before making their way inside the gaudy lobby of their hotel towards the elevators. As they walked, Tarak reached over and pinched Ram in the side just as they passed by some other hotel guests, which made his friend jump and contort at the tickling touch right in front of them.

“I’m so sorry. My friend is a child,” Ram said in a low voice as he glared at Tarak with a smile on his face, the hotel guests giving Ram a look before stepping away.

Tarak walked a little faster to the open elevator, hoping to avoid Ram’s revenge. This escape plan was futile as once he stepped inside, Ram entered right behind him. Tarak instinctually covered the sides of his ribs to protect himself from pinches while giggling like a schoolboy. Ram hit the button for their floor and glared at his friend.

“It was too tempting! You would have done the same!” Tarak said in a higher pitch, waiting for Ram to strike as the doors to the elevator closed.

Ram smiled and laughed at the truth that Tarak spoke. “You are right. If I could, I would pinch you while you meet with Steven Spielberg.”

Tarak’s expression turned to one of overdramatic shock, “Betrayer!” he spoke before giggling some more.

The two of them continued to snicker at their almost drunken buffoonery as the elevator arrived on their floor. As they walked, Tarak slung an arm over Ram’s shoulders and felt his friend put an arm around his waist as they approached their room. Tarak fiddled with the keycard to unlock the door as Ram found his time to strike. Just as Tarak opened the door, he felt the pinch he had hoped would have been forgotten in the elevator ride and immediately shifted his body to avoid the tickle while laughing and stepping inside. He whirled around with a smile on his face as he held his hands in a defensive posture while Ram stalked towards him almost like a hunter, a goofy expression on his face.

The door behind them closed, and Ram leaped at Tarak to continue tormenting his sensitive ribs, but Tarak’s strength was too much for him as his wrists were caught and held in place. The two men giggled as they play wrestled with each other, Tarak’s strength and history of winning these fights proving an advantage as after a few moments, he managed to pin Ram down to one of the beds, luckily Ram’s, with his arms above his head. Tarak straddled his friend's waist, still giggling as he secured his win. “Do you give up?” he asked with a husky, out-of-breath voice.

Ram struggled under his grip, but eventually, the wiggling subsided. Ram looked up at Tarak with an expression of defeat. “Alright. You win,” he murmured dejectedly.

Tarak eased his grip on Ram’s wrists, allowing them to move freely. Ram placed them on each of Tarak’s quads. Something about that touch slowly caused the smile on Tarak’s face to change. He was still seated on his friend, both arms on each side of Ram’s head for support. It took a moment to realize that neither of them had moved or spoken for a long while. They remained in that position, simply looking into each other’s eyes.

This moment seemed to stretch time and space for Tarak. A million different thoughts flew through his mind, all about how beautiful Ram really was and how he didn’t want to admit it in the past. There was nothing outside of himself and Ram in this position that mattered. Tarak wanted nothing more than to lean down and kiss Ram, but he realized he hadn’t breathed in a while and felt himself inhale shakily.

“Are… you alright?” Ram asked quietly, his eyes not leaving Tarak’s as his expression also changed. Something about his eyes made his gaze deepen.

“Y-Yeah. Yes. I’m alright.” Tarak answered, his throat feeling dry. He blinked and shook off the thoughts in his head, not wanting to possibly ruin what he cared so deeply for. Tarak lifted himself off Ram and sat on the edge of his own bed a mere foot away. “Sorry for lingering. The bourbon had me a little dizzy.”

Ram let out a small groan as Tarak’s weight was removed, and he could sit up. Tarak noticed a little grin on his friend’s face as he found a more comfortable sitting position. Tarak caught Ram’s gaze and instinctively looked away, feeling a blush start to form on his cheeks.

“You and your bourbon are a perfect recipe for chaos,” Ram snickered.

Tarak found his smile and laughed in response, “What can I say? It’s my poison of choice. Unless you were making coffee,”

Both men giggled momentarily, and a comfortable silence fell between them. Tarak found his gaze magnetized to the warmness of Ram’s eyes. After allowing the moment to remain, Tarak eventually rose from his seat on his bed. “We should probably get some sleep. Big day tomorrow.” Tarak spoke in a low, shuddered voice.

Ram nodded, looking like there was something he wanted to say before choosing to leave it unsaid. The two men took turns stepping into the bathroom to change into proper pajamas instead of just underwear. As they did, Tarak felt something hanging in the air between them, a strange energy that made his heart flutter even more when he caught Ram glancing in his direction as he prepared his bed for a good night’s sleep.

Both men climbed into their beds, and Tarak turned off the lamp that was on the wall. As darkness filled the room and both men got comfortable, Tarak’s eyes hovered over the dark shape of his best friend in the other bed. He strained his eyes as he tried to determine what position Ram was sleeping in, then lightly shook the curiosity off. Don’t be creepy, Tarak. He thought to himself. As a few moments of trying to find sleep passed, he eventually turned back to look in Ram’s direction, his eyes adjusting enough to see his head poking out from under the covers. In a moment of something between weakness and boldness, Tarak called out quietly from his bed.

“Are you still awake?” Tarak whispered,

There was slight movement before he heard a whisper back, “Yes. What is it?”

Once again, Tarak found himself in a predicament where he only wanted to confess his feelings, climb out of bed, and lie next to Ram. He was so tempted, finding that the voice of reason in his brain was apparently having trouble reporting in until the last moment as Tarak replied.

“I think… You are going to do wonderfully tomorrow. Kevin is going to love you,” Tarak clutched his eyes shut in defeat.

Tarak then heard some movement from Ram’s side of the room before his voice broke through,

“I wouldn’t have been able to do any of this without you here, Tarak.” Ram’s velvety voice spoke out from the mass of blankets that was a bed.

Tarak took a moment and absorbed each word, smiling deeply and closing his eyes to the feeling. He would do anything for the man in the other bed to be happy and successful. Tarak knew he wanted to say more, to reveal what was in his heart, but he was thankful for the words that reached his ears.

“Good night, baby one,” he heard Ram say in a sleepy voice, making the sweet feeling in his chest more palpable.

“Good night, baby two.”

***

Both men had awoken extra early to make sure they would be ready in time for Tomas to pick them up. Ram managed to awaken at eight and immediately jumped in the shower to ready himself. Tarak noted that Ram took a little longer as he assumed some meticulous beard grooming was happening. Eventually, Ram did step out of the shower wearing the bathrobe from the day before, now freshly cleaned. Before he could let himself be distracted again by the beautiful man, Tarak retreated into the bathroom to diligently clean himself and prepare. He quickly disrobed and jumped into the shower, deciding it would be best for a cold shower this morning to help him fully awaken. The coldness of the water thankfully further prevented any thoughts of Ram. After feeling clean enough, he stepped out and continued his morning routine.

Unlike his friend, however, Tarak had little patience for making sure his beard was as immaculate. His face was mere inches from the mirror's glass, and he moved his head in every possible direction to ensure his beard was even and not crooked. As he moved, Tarak released more than one grumpy curse in Telugu. After several minutes of making the tiniest adjustments to his beard, Tarak heard Ram’s voice on the other side of the door.

“I can hear you from out here. Do you need help?”

Tarak growled, “No. I can do this myself. We should have gone to a barber yesterday,”

He heard a muffled chuckle and instinctively glared at the dark wood of the door, “Come on, Tarak. I can assist you. I don’t want you to take all day.”

Tarak grumbled as he reached for the door handle, then looked down and realized he was still completely naked from the shower. He quickly grabbed the bathrobe and secured it before finally opening the door.

Of course, he already looks positively radiant. Tarak grumpily thought to himself. All he has to do is wake up, comb his hair a little, and he is ready to meet the bloody Queen of England. Ram stood in the doorway wearing the outfit he had bought from the shop the day before. Even though Tarak chose to suffer through a cold shower, there was a feeling of heat in the pit of his stomach as he took in the sight of his beautiful Ram.

Ram paused momentarily, moving Tarak’s head in a few directions while examining his beard. After an appraising look on his face, Ram stepped into the bathroom and took the razor. Methodically, he lifted Tarak’s head and gently touched up the lower part of his friend’s beard. With each touch, Tarak’s nerves threatened to jolt in excitement; the hands of Ram softly dragging across his neck almost drove him mad. All he could think was what the feeling of Ram’s lips on his neck would feel like if his hands were this soft. As he stood with his head craned to look at the ceiling, he slowly clutched his eyes shut in an attempt to will his lower extremities to behave. Finally, Ram lowered Tarak’s face and inspected the beard lines on his cheeks. Tarak had experienced this closeness with Ram before while shooting a particular scene in RRR where the character of Bheem was being groomed to attend the party at Jenny’s invitation. However, instead of a look of naive curiosity on Tarak’s face, it was a look of restraint as Ram’s hands caressed his cheek.

Finding it far too difficult to continue this torture, Tarak eventually spoke up. “I really only needed help with my neck. Thank you for all of your assistance, baby.” His voice was breathy, and he mentally kicked himself for sounding like a child.

“Are you sure? There is one spot I can fix-” Ram tried to continue,

“Oh! I can see it. I’ll take care of it.” Tarak quickly asserted that he could handle the rest.

Ram shrugged with a smile and stepped out of the bathroom, checking his watch. “We have about an hour before Tomas gets here. If you are ready by then, take all the time you need.”

Tarak felt himself melt a little at that smile once again, nodding as he closed the door to the bathroom. He glanced down at the tent in his bathrobe that would have slowly parted if Ram had not left when he did. After Ram’s touching, his thoughts were of wrapping him up in a tight bear hug and pinning him to the door. Tarak groaned quietly as he willed his arousal to calm, doing his best to push such thoughts from his mind. Instead, Tarak focused on the small part of his beard that Ram had pointed out, trying to mimic Ram’s attention to detail as he evened it out. Confident that his beard was well groomed, Tarak stepped out of the bathroom to finish preparing for lunch.

***

The two men were at the main entrance ten minutes before the scheduled meeting time, and, to their pleasant surprise, Tomas was already there waiting for them. The three hopped into the familiar large SUV and felt the excitement build as the vehicle pulled away from the hotel doors and onto the street. Some small talk was exchanged, but Tomas could tell that his two backseat guests were nervous. As the SUV pulled up in front of a beautiful modern restaurant with ‘Cecconi’s’ labeled above the large open double doors. The two men in the backseat stared out the window at the building as if they were staring at the gates to Mount Olympus.

With the car parked, Tomas turned around in his seat to lock eyes with the two men, a comforting expression on his face.

“You are going to do fine. Just breathe and be yourselves. Kevin is a very nice guy. Plus, this is just a casual lunch. The business talk will probably be in a couple days,” Tomas spoke gently, realizing that maybe fifty percent of what he said was heard by the two men, making him chuckle.

Tarak turned to Ram with an excited expression. “You ready, Charan?”

Ram took a moment to take in a deep breath, nodding in reply to his friend.

Before they stepped out of the car, Tarak placed a soft hand on Ram’s thigh and lightly squeezed. “You were born for this, baby.” He spoke sweetly and smiled when Ram’s nerves visibly relaxed. Tomas smiled and looked at Tarak’s eyes, noting that particular sight.

The two men stepped out of the black SUV and approached the door, seeing a hostess standing behind a small beautiful wooden desk. She looked up and smiled at the two men, “Welcome to Cecconi’s! Kevin just arrived a moment ago. Let me lead you to your table.” she spoke sweetly and very professionally, which made Tarak smile and nod. Ram looked like he felt more than a little stiff.

They were led through the interior of the restaurant and past several tables. As they walked, Ram whispered to Tarak and gestured to a table on the other side of the room, “I think that is Jake Gyllenhaal.” Ram’s perception made Tarak giggle as he glanced in that direction, inwardly confirming that it was, in fact, Jake Gyllenhaal. I wonder how many other celebrities come here for lunch. Tarak thought to himself as they walked.

The hostess led them to the patio, where they saw the man they had come to meet sitting at one of the tables. Unlike some of the other guests, Kevin was wearing a simple blue polo and a baseball cap with jeans. Kevin glanced up as the hostess approached with Tarak and Ram and rose with his hand out,

“Wonderful to see you both! You guys made it!” Kevin said with a smile.

Ram and Tarak both shook Kevin’s hand, Ram speaking up first.

“It's wonderful to meet you, sir. This place looks wonderful! The food smells great,” Ram smiled that charming smile, but there was a minor shake to his voice,

“Thank you so much for inviting us,” Tarak said with a bright smile as the three men sat at the table.

“Of course! This is one of my favorite spots to get lunch. Their green eggs are my favorite,” Kevin said with a smile.

The polite conversation followed with all three men enjoying their lunch. Tarak noticed that Ram still seemed a little nervous as time passed. Knowing he needed to do something to ease his friend’s mind, Tarak slowly moved his foot under the table to lightly press against Ram’s. Since he couldn’t hold his hand, he would try and communicate the same calming feeling with his foot. As he smiled at Kevin’s current story of his time in LA and his favorite spots, he stole a quick moment to glance at Ram and give a comforting smile. As he did, he saw Ram’s eyes lock with his, and a smile spread across his face as he tuned back into what Kevin was saying. A moment later, Tarak felt Ram’s foot push against his own, almost an unspoken gesture of thanks.

Kevin eventually shifted the conversation away from the small talk as he used his napkin to clean off excess crumbs from his face from his toast. “So, I know that we are going to meet in a couple more days to discuss particulars, but I wanted to let you know the role we had in mind for you,” Kevin said, looking at Ram.

Ram leaned in slightly, his expression shifting to business mode, “Absolutely. I’d love to know more.”

Kevin smirked and continued, “We are going to be working towards a relaunch of the X-Men to fit into the greater MCU, and we are looking to fill out our cast. We want to include a particular character from the comics named Indra. He is one of the students at the academy. This would start as a minor role that would eventually grow with future films.”

Ram smiled and nodded respectfully, allowing Kevin to explain further. Tarak couldn’t help but take in the sight of Ram speaking with Kevin, a mammoth producer in Hollywood. It warmed Tarak’s chest to witness the moment that Ram’s career would change and grow. He looked on almost like a proud parent or spouse.

Kevin glanced at his watch and let out a sigh, “Ugh. I’m so sorry. I’m going to have to cut this a little short. One of our trailers got leaked, so we must officially prepare to show it at the upcoming comic convention next month.”

Ram nodded, “Oh, I completely understand! A producer’s job is never done, right?” Ram joked,

“Haha! You aren’t kidding for sure.” Kevin stood again, offering his hand to the two men, “It was wonderful meeting the two of you. I promise we will have more time to discuss everything in a few days.”

Ram eagerly shook Kevin’s hand, “The pleasure was all ours, Kevin. Thank you so much,”

Tarak also shook Kevin’s hand with a grin on his face. He then signaled one of the servers as they passed by the table. “I am going to take care of the check for the three of us.”

Kevin’s eyes widened as he smiled, “Oh, you didn’t have to do that!”

Tarak shook his head with a smile, “It is my treat. You showed us yet another wonderful place to visit for some delicious food. It’s the least I could do.”

Mr. Feige smiled and had an appraising look for a moment, “Well, thank you, Tarak. I gotta run. I will let Tomas know when we have a meeting set in stone,” Kevin said as he stepped away from the table and waved to the two men.

Once he was out of sight, Ram sat back down at the table and sighed as though he had an unbearable weight on his shoulders.

Tarak sat back down as well, looking to Ram with a worried expression, “What’s wrong? You did great!” he said in a comforting voice.

“I was so nervous the entire lunch. I don’t know if I was participating in the conversation as I should have been. I couldn’t tell you what we discussed before he started talking about the role.” Ram finally uttered. He held his head with one of his hands and stared at the white tablecloth.

Tarak sighed with a smile and reached over to lightly take Ram’s chin in his hand, turning it so he could look directly into Ram’s worried eyes. “I promise. You did wonderfully. He even specifically brought up the role he is considering you for. He wouldn’t have done that if he wasn’t serious about his consideration for you,”

A moment passed where Ram’s eyes still held onto some of the worries, but Tarak was pleased to see a light smile play across his face. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Tarak.” his voice was low and sweet, making Tarak’s eyes squint.

I don’t know that there are words to explain how beautiful you are. I don’t know if there are enough stars in the sky to match how many ways you make me happy. There is no need to dream as long as I am with you. So many possible responses to Ram’s confession entered Tarak’s mind. He wanted to admit them all. To sit and say each one until night fell. There wouldn’t be one wasted moment.

Instead, Tarak chose to lightly cup Ram’s cheek and smile a little wider, almost hoping that this small gesture would satisfy his desire to pour everything in his heart out for Ram to see. After letting his hand linger and feeling the need to pull it back for fear of onlookers, his breath hitched as Ram placed his hand on top of Tarak’s. That little act made Tarak’s mind race. They had done this a million times before; it was their normal behavior. But after the last few days, it made Tarak’s heart dance in his chest.

In this moment, as Tarak took in the sight and feeling of Ram’s cheek in his hand, a terrible and dangerous thought entered his mind. What if? When this question came to the forefront of his thoughts, Tarak felt heat spread throughout his body, his nerves slowly numbing. What if Ram felt the same way toward me? Tarak repeated in his mind as he tried his best to memorize the feeling of the pristine beard of his best friend in his hands, the texture of his soft skin, and the eyes of Ram staring right back at him with that sweet smile.

Tarak felt his expression shift, his smile changing as it did the night before, and his breath shuddering for just a moment. Everything in his body wanted to pursue this hypothetical scenario to whatever conclusion there would be. Just as Tarak’s mouth opened slowly to take that step and ask the question that could ruin everything, he and Ram felt their phones vibrate in their pockets. Tarak slowly retrieved his hand as his wits returned to check his phone to see Tomas's message to him and Ram.

T: Where are you guys? Kevin left a couple minutes ago.

Tarak smiled as his mind began working correctly once again. He quickly typed that they were leaving before looking up at Ram.

“You ready to celebrate the start of the next chapter of your career?” Tarak asked with an excited tone,

Ram nodded, and the both of them rose from their seats and walked towards the exit. As they walked, Tarak inwardly thanked the heavens for not allowing him to be foolish enough to take such a risk with his beloved friendship with Ram. Yet even as he was thankful, much of his heart hurt with yearning. With each step, his limbs regained feeling, and he felt himself settle back into reality as they approached the familiar vehicle their guide sat in.

The two men climbed inside, and Tomas looked back excitedly. “Well? How did it go??”

Tarak spoke before Ram could underplay his performance, “It went wonderfully. Kevin divulged a little insider information on what Ram was being considered for.”

Ram waved off Tarak’s compliments. “I worry that I was a little overly nervous, but I do also think it went pretty well.”

Tomas smiled brightly, “Fantastic news! I’m always glad to hear it!”

Tarak smiled. “I think we should celebrate. What do you recommend, Tomas? It’s the middle of the day, and the weather is beautiful.”

Tomas smirked a devilish smile, clearly already having something in mind. “What would you guys say to a beach day? Mateo has been bugging me about catching some sun and unplugging for a while. I don’t have any other appointments or talent to cart around town anyway,” He said in a playful tone.

Ram’s eyes lit up, “I love the beach!”

Tarak laughed, “Mateo has the right attitude! In fact, bring him along! I want to meet this Mateo!”

Tomas’ eyebrows shot up, “Really?”

Ram shrugged, “Why not? The more, the merrier.”

Tomas laughed and shook his head, “You two are definitely the nicest talent I have taken care of since I started this job,” Tomas said as the vehicle pulled onto the street.

***

The SUV stopped by the hotel, so Tarak and Ram could change into proper beach clothing, finding their swimsuits and a tank top to wear with their sandals. They also brought a small bag with a couple of water bottles, sunglasses, and some sunscreen, just in case. They then quickly stopped by Tomas’ apartment and watched as Tomas stepped out wearing his own beach clothes with his Mateo. Mateo was a taller man with a thicker build and had long hair kept in a bun. He walked alongside Tomas while holding his hand. Before he stepped into the car, Mateo pulled Tomas into a fleeting yet passionate kiss. Tomas then opened the trunk to place a small cooler and a couple of beach blankets inside.

As Mateo settled in the passenger seat, he gave a slightly nervous wave to the two men in the backseat. “Hey there! I’m the husband!”

Tarak chuckled at the greeting, “Hello, the husband! I am the Tarak, and this is the Ram!”

Ram rolled his eyes at Tarak’s joke and smiled, “Wonderful to meet you, Mateo. Tomas has said so much about you.”

Tomas smiled as he closed his door, turning the car on. “Don’t worry, I only told them terrible things about you.”

Mateo made a face, “You would,” he said in a tone that made all the men laugh.

It didn’t take long before the SUV was parked at a small parking lot next to the beach. Tomas opened the trunk to retrieve their supplies. The four men walked along the beach and laughed as they continued their small talk, finding a suitable spot to set up their blankets under one of the large umbrellas and a couple of beach chairs available.

Ram had put on his sunglasses and handed Tarak his pair, “So, how did you two meet?”

Mateo smiled at Tomas and explained, “We met at a coffee shop. He sort of cut me in line for coffee and-”

“Hey now! You cut me in line. If you’re going to tell the story, tell it right.” Tomas grumbled, smiling to himself.

Mateo laughed, “We cut each other in line and managed to make small talk. We pretty much hit it off right away. After a few days of idle chat, I asked him for dinner. Little did I know how picky he was.” Mateo glanced in Tomas’ direction once again, expecting a snarky response.

“I took Matt Damon to that restaurant, and he got food poisoning from it! I was wary! So sue me!”

Tarak laughed at the two and how adorable they were but found all attention diminished from them as Ram removed his tank top, and the beautiful, sculpted muscles of his chest and back were in plain view for all to see. He looks like he should be on the cover of a magazine. Or a romance novel. Tarak thought to himself, stunned in place by the sight.

“Hey, Tarak! How about a bottle of water? It’s extra hot out, I wouldn’t want you to be thirsty,” Tomas said rather loudly to break Tarak out of his trance, tossing him a cold bottle of water from their cooler. Ram retrieved one of their own water bottles from their bag.

Tarak thankfully smirked, shaking his head from the spell Ram’s beautiful body had him under. He took a drink and also removed his own shirt, stretching a bit as his own chest and back were exposed. His muscles still ached from the other day's workout, but not as painfully. He quickly sprayed the sunscreen over his furry chest and arms to be on the safe side. Then, he turned away from Ram to set up one of the blankets on the sand.

As Tarak fought against the wind to have the blanket settle without being blown away, he heard Ram speak behind him,

“I’m going to go and get into the water for a bit.”

Tarak noted a strange inflection in his voice and turned to see Ram already on his way to the water’s edge. He then heard Mateo and Tomas snickering and glanced in their direction, his eyes narrowing.

“And what’s so entertaining?” Tarak inquired, his eyes still narrowed in a faux grumpy face.

Tomas took an extra moment to respond as he shook his head. “You two are hilarious and cute. That’s all,”

Mateo nodded, “It’s true. I’ve known you two for twenty minutes, and I think you guys are adorable together.”

Tarak felt his cheeks flush, “Together- Oh no. No, we’re not…” Tarak slowly silenced himself as Mateo’s expression didn’t change. His eyes then looked to Tomas irritated, “You told him, didn’t you?”

Tomas opened his mouth to explain, but no words came, and he hung his head. “I’m sorry, Tarak. I only told him so I could get another perspective involved to help you if needed. Please forgive me.”

Mateo sat up a little from his blanket, “It was my fault. I asked how the day went yesterday, and I kinda poked and prodded for a full rundown of the situation. My lips are sealed. I promise.”

Tarak wanted to be upset but nodded. He could tell that the two of them meant well and genuinely cared. As he finally laid back on his blanket, he felt the dam of thoughts of the last several hours about to burst.

“I need to figure out how to control myself. It’s like I’m an animal starving for food around him. Whenever he shows a bit of platonic sweetness toward me, I want to pounce. Its happened multiple times since we arrived here. We have only been here for a couple of days! How am I going to be able to get through this without ruining everything?” Tarak grumbled. Both Mateo and Tomas nodded in understanding but shared a look between the two of them. Tarak caught this exchange, and again he felt his eyes narrow. “What now?” he asked in a grumpy voice.

Mateo looked at Tomas and took a long drink from his water bottle.

Tomas sighed before he looked at Tarak with a genuine smile on his face, “Okay. Tell me more about these interactions.”

Tarak spent the next few minutes divulging, with some explicit details about his physical reactions missing, the several encounters he had with Ram that had his mind spiraling. With each one, the eyebrows of both Mateo and Tomas rose higher and higher.

“You were on top of him, and he gave no intention of pushing you off?” Mateo asked with a slightly incredulous tone to his voice.

“No. We just stared at each other for a few moments.” Tarak replied.

“Wait, let's go back to yesterday morning. He saw you in your boxers, and you said his behavior changed a little. Changed how?” Tomas asked.

Tarak’s head wobbled as he tried to think of how to explain. “He looked like he was flustered. He blushed a little and looked away.”

Mateo and Tomas shared a look and were about to continue speaking when they saw Ram approaching and opened their cooler to present a bottle of margarita mix and tequila, quickly changing the subject.

Ram wandered back with clear signs he did more than just dip his feet in the water as droplets were running down most of his body, his swimsuit clinging a little to his form. Tarak quickly distracted himself by accepting one of the margaritas and taking a big gulp, choosing to instead stare out at the horizon. The drink's coolness combated the sun's heat rather well, as Tarak felt a chill run down his back.

“How’s the water?” Tomas asked,

“Surprisingly warm. It was nice to step into the waves.” Ram said, a strange smirk on his face as he lay on one of the available blankets.

Tarak saw Tomas nudge Mateo a bit with his elbow. A moment later, Mateo started conversing with Ram about his workout habits, mentioning that he really liked lifting weights. As Ram was distracted by Mateo’s mention of healthy habits, Tarak felt his phone vibrate. It was a text from Tomas.

T: Do not react to this message. Why haven’t you pounced, exactly?

Tarak put on his best poker face and feverishly typed a reply.

NTR: What do you mean? These interactions are no different than before I started having these thoughts.

Tomas’ response came quickly.

T: That’s my point, Tarak. What if these moments happened before this because Ram has been feeling the same way about you that you do for him? What if he is waiting for you to say something?

Tarak felt his heartbeat quicken, unsure what to send back.

T: Mateo and I saw him check you out when you took your shirt off, almost exactly how you checked him out a second beforehand.

Tarak had to read that message several times before it sunk in. Before he could respond, Tomas sent one final message.

T: Just think about it. Maybe by talking about it with him, things may work out differently than you think. Now relax and enjoy a couple of drinks.

Tarak slowly put his phone away, suddenly hyper-aware of his position in relation to Ram on the beach. His eyes looked over in Tomas’ direction. Tomas took a long drink from his margarita while looking directly back at Tarak, signaling to do the same. Tarak savored another taste of the cold drink as his mind whirled in his head. That question he had at the restaurant returned with a vengeance in his mind.

What if?

After much internal debate, Tarak came to a decision. His heart began beating a mile a minute, but he was resolved on the next action to take.

Tonight. I will talk to him tonight.

@vijayasena @kaagazkefool @stars-in-the-distance

#rrr fandom #ntr jr #charak #ram charan #rpf fic

[ladybuggirl123]

Fascism/Flop Eras/The Art Of The Rebrand

If the tone of this post is completely different from last week it’s because my prozac just started working!! If i came off as obsessive and impulsive it’s because i was!! i’m working on it 😁

Alright, Where did we leave off?…

Emotional Terrorism I believe it was-

I now see how entirely dramatic this phrase is(tysm prozac). I probably need to watch my provocative language, I’ve never In my life been a chill or fun girlfriend.

If “emotional terrorist” is a fitting title for any of these people honestly who could blame them, i’m basically an emotional fascist. After my regime is overthrown I have to rebrand obviously.

Teenager’s (and me), are calling this “having an era” . A little google action reminded me this all started with the “Flop Era”

This is what a flop era looks like for the unfamiliar:

this is what getting ur emotionally fascist empire taken down by a emotional terrorist does to a mf

#bringbackcryingselfies

i think i almost bought a “flop era” tshirt in 2021 but i went with ironically hot instead

simpler times…lol

Anyway all the sudden everypony online was in their fleabag era or their reputation era. It’s 2023 Taylor Swift’s having her eras tour and now I barely remember who I was before it became a part of the cultural zeitgeist for a normal non celebrity girl to have definable eras.

here are a few favorites of mine:

i don’t endorse any of these eras also i think i probably do this to an unhealthy degree

bpd grrl era:

grunge post woke fleabag on vyvanse era:

the I ready theory (only lasch) era

looking like I play a [REDACTED] in a [REDACTED] era:

Rebranding isn’t a new thing at all but hyper specific digital language used to describe how you express yourself obviously is and this is a tired conversation at this point.

How is “I’m in my looksmaxxed bushwick kinderwhore era” a thing you could say and how did I get to a point in my life where i know exactly what that would mean. It’s internet buzzword salad and it feels like it’s too much information for my brain to be storing and holding onto at all times (is this where my ancestors kept the berry forageing knowledge? is this really what i’m using it for??)

quick grass touching break 4 u

whatever mental illness i have was designed to pick this shit apart for hours so sometimes this all drives me a little nuts but it’s ok cause i’m a mental health warrior💪🏼

When you feel it’s time for your new era you could sift through pinterest rabbit holes and tiktok echochambers trying to find the perfect niche that describes the new and improved you. You’ll probably find a corner of the internet with other people just like you who like all the same esoteric celebrities you do, who listen to the same underground bands and who all talk the same cool way. But they are all doing it a little better than you.

Then you wake up from the digital coma you slipped into from stemming from unsupervised internet access at a young age, and you realize this is the dumbest shit in the world and ur actually and literally a full ass adult..

🎀Here is my personal plan of action for a non internet poisoned rebrand:🎀

Step 1- The Transformational Event

This could be a breakup, a breakdown, a move, or just a general realization that challenges all ideas you previously had about yourself.

Step 1.5- Deep Emotional Pain

😁

Step 2- Get Ur Ass up

Envision the you that has moved on and no longer feels held down by the emotional weight of the situation. How do they spend their free time? What passions are they pursuing ? what kind of people do they surround themselves with? lastly how do they dress how would they adorn their space? Work from the inside out.

Instead of looking up glass skin healed french girl aesthetic on pinterest you could journal about this version of you or even make a physical vision board.

Step 3- Faking it

Initially you might feel like you are not mentally stable or cool enough or whatever to be this person. But the person is you and the only way you can become them is to just start.

Step 4- God and Faeries take over

Spoiler alert: what i referred to as “faking it” in the last step is also called vibrating at a higher frequency. As I type this out I’m aware that i only maybe half believe it but also this has always worked for me my whole life so……

The circumstances in your life will basically rise to meet you where you are. you’ll start to realize you have the types of friends the new version of you would, you’ll develop the habits you wanted to and you’ll realize you have faked it till you made it.

Step 5- You are sexier and doing better than you ever imagined!

As time goes by and you think back to yourself immediately after the initial transformational event you’ll realize you have become even cooler and happier and more grown up than you hoped you’d be

If u did this right you’ll also feel a little bit of gratitude for the transformational experience because it basically provided a short cut for ur prefrontal cortex development.

that’s all the knowledge i have on this phenomenon here’s a tiktok and a podcast episode that probably inspired me to write this

#Spotify #coquettestyle #girl interrupted #red scare #blokecore #bushwick #indie sleaze #2014 tumblr #rookie magazine #lana del ray aka lizzy grant #lana del rey #2014 nostalgia #girl blog #caroline polachek #blog #writeblr #writing

[lucienarcheron]

I just needed a place to vent about this - but as someone who enjoys Taylor Swift and ACOTAR, the fandom has just been insane lately. I think it’s really shown me that for me personally, I’m more than happy to just be at the level of enjoying the content. It’s been exhausting to scroll thru social media and see people getting waaay too into the next album/book release, private dating lives, finding Easter eggs that are just eggs lol like sometimes a sweater is just a sweater guys pls 😂

Oh babes, I feel you! The fandom has been insane for much longer than a while. I honestly felt like it started going off the rails pre-acosf and just kept going nuts after. I've said it before and I'll say it again, with SJM, it's just never that deep. Never. Your headcanon is just that, your headcanon. If it doesn't come true in canon, that's on you not SJM lol. We know Sarah only really plans to a certain extent so there aren't going to be as many easter eggs as people think.

And don't get me wrong, it's fun to speculate and be silly about it. But there's a difference between being silly and knowing you're being silly versus believing it and going out of pocket with it. Most of the time with this fandom, it's been the second option and it's taken any fun and enjoyment out of this series because of how dumb some people are with it.

It's the same thing with being a Swiftie. It's fun to clown about albums and stuff but the way people go so deep into her personal life is actually sick. She's a person, not a machine.

People need to go back to just enjoying things at face value and not thinking too deeply about them lol. We'd all be have a great time.

#asks #anon #it also gets so boring so fast #like ENOUGH #sjm #tswift

[twigstarpikachutroll22]

Being a fan of Taylor Swift’s music who actually is normal about her is a weird as frick experience.

I’ll go into the tags about her and maybe half of what I see has me like “YEAH that part of that song really did go SUPER hard” but the other half (or more) of what I see has me like “…maybe chill out a little??? she makes good music for sure but at the end of the day she really is just some lady” and I feel like anycreature in those tags would be absolutely flabbergasted if I said that.

And then everywhere else that I see anycreature mentioning her it’s like “swifties are insane” “her music is just so mid i don’t understand how anycreature goes that nuts over it” “she sucks butt” “stop taking private jets already and then acting like you’re some kind of victim.” And I’m not denying that her doing that is absolute garbage, or that her most hardcore fans desperately need to touch grass, or even that there is music out there that goes harder than pretty much any of hers and covers subject matter she hasn’t (I’m also a fan of The Amazing Devil, The Stupendium, and trust me a LOT of less mainstream artists I’ve seen plenty else out there), but like. Her music is also genuinely better than y’all are giving it credit for. There are songs she’s written that genuinely do justify going insane over, I prommy.

#.txt