Tumgik
#i still dont wear makeup ever tho lol
guinevereslancelot · 18 days
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i actually love the comeback of bucket hats and mom jeans and big glasses and fanny packs and clunky shoes personally. i was born to dress like a dorky tourist from the 90s
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pekodayz · 8 months
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u ever just want to vent but u dont wanna bc ppl might just find you a vibe killer so u just sit there with ur head throbbing repressing it. ok sorry i need to vent. I’m gonna look back on this in 5 mins and wince
I’ve just been thinking abt how throughout my life well maybe just growing up. I’d be sitting with my friends and someone comes up and compliments one of them, I never gotten that. Well besides my eyebrows. Never my hairstyle, there’s literally nothing wrong with it..I never understood that. Like outside of high school ppl say things now but back then I never was complimented like that. I know this sounds selfish and stupid but I kinda wish someone flirted with me im not ugly right. I know I’m not ugly. all my friends got and still get flirted with, i never gotten that im not ugly right im. I’m pretty ?? Yeah. I’m a pretty gal I wish someone had a crush on me growing up. I will never know, if someone had feelings for me that wasn’t online. Like a real person, who saw my face. I sound so stupid why am I upset about such trivial things. I have a job, friends, ppl that care about me but this is something that has been fucking with me for years. I don’t wear makeup like them. Unless im doing some gyaru shtick. But even then, they still get flirted with. What do I know. I shouldn’t be complaining about this this is shallow. Maybe that’s why over the years I just stopped caring for love and affection and I’m on the ace spectrum now. I lost my ability to even have a crush bc im petrified of what could come of that. I had a crush once in 9th grade and hell, even I knew then I wasn’t worthy of this. I’m never probably gonna have someone be with me and that’s okay. I don’t wanna deal with the heartache. My heart hurts I wish someone would hug me and tell me somethin. Idk what tbh but something would be nice. I’m not lonely but I suppose the feeling of “haha yeah I remember when [name] had a crush on me lol” is kinda endearing. even if it probably was stupid. That’s probably the only things I’m jealous about towards my friends, pretty fucking dumb tho. I’m slowly getting over it, but oughh it’s wrong im gross for thinking that. I’m not mean to ppl irl idk what’s wrong but I don’t really care..that much anymore ig. I’ve come to terms with it, sorry if I sound selfish. More money for me i guess. I wish platonic cuddling was real at least. I’m not touch starved I think I just wanna have somthint in my life. just a little bit :3 ! But it’s okay………I can just be pathetic behind my normal irl persona and talk to a fucking bot to satisfy this pain. I’m glad I have gyaru tho, at least I feel cute..I don’t need to be wanted I think. It’s fun having a mask on. Ughhh. Ok well um sorry if you read through this hellish and disgusting vent . Yeesh! Im pretty, I’ll keep that in my thoughts so I won’t start crying again. EW OKAY UHHHHH emotional amirite! 😯😯😯😯😯😯😯😯
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icharchivist · 10 months
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gosh, mentioning your friend who got bowled over by act 2 autumn must’ve been foreshadowing, because I, who foolishly was like, oh I don’t think I’ll relate to azami that much he’s very different from me but it’ll be fun to see autumn, cried twice while going thru the back half of this story. jeez. I’ll may have to be a bit less chronological than usual for the sake of keeping all of that stuff later.
zombie run night was rly great! more like zombie fun night amirite. I’m sorry I make bad jokes. banri getting azami to be a zombie as well was so nice like. again he’s being a good leader.
tenma being scared of zombies makes sense obviously. I’m with him. not zombies but when I was staying with a relative a while back I found a lizard the length of my hand in the bathroom and then refused to use that bathroom for the rest of my stay.
I really liked the eyeball necklace detail—it made the event feel real and also considerate? the moment yuki just went … at tenma I Knew he had planted the necklace on him tho. he’s so funny for that. seeing that and being like yeah tenma you’re so right. you don’t need to participate. cant believe mankai didn’t recognize banri when he caught them. azami must have some stellar makeup skills
azami going after sakyo and haunting him abt his budget lifestyle was sooo funny. like I was bracing for something slightly charged to happen but it was just funny. and he had a good time!! I’m glad. I liked that banri was like. still encouraging to azami even tho his acting motives aren’t the purest lol. I mean to be fair he has no room to talk there but it’s also just nice to like. meet him where he’s at. like we see azami doesn’t really get The Feeling until closing night but. things take time.
azami and omis whole thing was. so good. like the way he won’t even like accept a bandaid is so. azami… I loved the way they resolved it? first seeing omi juza and tsuzuru talking in uni was cool. but then kumon approaching azami was like. so nice. again the way that they like talk and kumon’s like I miss summer! and u can Hear the smile in azamis voice when he’s like come on summer literally just ended!
but him being awkward around omi bc he’s not sure what a mother should be like… gosh. like the way he describes the whole thing as like. strange and confusing I’m going to vote the wall like. like yeah actually that’s exactly how it feels when someone is kind to you in a way you haven’t yet experienced it makes you want to throw it off immediately bc it’s like whoa whoa hold on. I’m not allowed this kind of thing. anyways just. no wonder he likes kumon so much that guy is like, effusive in his praise and azami probably likes having ppl around who are Nice like that. loved omis portrait. it was so good. and it like. absolutely sucks that he had to grow up that quick. very nice to see nachi again, though. but when kid-omi was like: one day in the future. I’ll take a break for myself :) omi. omi I’m shaking you. have you ever really done that. well ig now that he’s living in mankai he’s letting his family take care of housework and stuff? but like, still.
minor note but when they’re doing a street act it was rly cool to see juza just like seamlessly and confidently advertise the play. he’s come so far…
*cracks knuckles* alright all of that was warmup now it’s time for the BIG STUFF. azami almost got hit by a car!!!! the cg there was like. So Good. like the way sakyo is absolutely Frazzled… yeah. like god I keep thinking abt that cg. its sooo. wow!! i dont think ive seen sakyo look so distressed!!! hes not wearing glasses bc he was so shocked that he ended up breaking his glasses in the rush to get there!! its like. azami look... u have a dad that wishes for your every happiness... and azami is just Sitting There mostly unharmed and looking a little confused like huh… why’s sakyo looking so out of sorts… it’s wonderful. and the way sakyo is like even if it was just a scrape I need to find who did this and hurt them. like godddd and the way he’s like “so I don’t even have the right to worry about you anymore?” I am. Going to cry.
what rly got me tho was like the whole jin-gi-oh cards though bc like first off sakyo remembered ALL of them but also!! also just the way u can hear azami kind of mumble stutter like we-well I bet he doesn’t even remember the card stuff (why would he really care about me…) and then sakyo clearly Does. and it’s just like.
it’s so clear that while sakyo is convinced that he barely has the right to talk to azami bc he betrayed him by chasing after his dream… a lot of what azami is worried about is that sakyo doesn’t care about him anymore. like imagine you’re fourteen and you’ve just learned that the guy you secretly think of as your dad, who’s like the only one that’s supported your dreams, is leaving you to pursue his own. without you. and you get into a huge fight with him about it and storm off. and then a week passes and you don’t hear from him. months pass and you don’t hear from him. whenever he’s around doing ginsenkai stuff you just… don’t really talk to him. and you’re fourteen maybe fifteen so you’re too embarrassed to reach out first. besides if he left that easily maybe this whole thing was just a job to him, huh? maybe he never liked you as much as you liked him. whatever. whatever. it’s fine. like the “I bet he’s having so much fun now” line azami says… it’s so clear he believes like. oh sakyo was slumming it with me and left for greener pastures.
and of course sakyo is sitting there like oh I’ve committed the biggest betrayal ever by not supporting his dreams well enough. he probably hates me and doesn’t want to ever see my face again. and like that’s not helping.
and then you run away from your bio dad because you can’t let go of your own dreams and when you don’t have anywhere to go it turns out that you can actually run to the place sakyo went to. and strangest of all sakyo is letting you stay. like the way he just. the pause he has when sakyo says he’s basically his guardian. the feeling of. sakyo is… admitting that? does he… does he WANT to be my dad (I thought he didn’t want to—)
and now you’re here in a hospital and just saw sakyo was super worried about you and also like. maybe treasures you in the way that you thought he did. sakyo says his story of running away is about a pathetic kid but it’s also like. for azami he just learned that the card thing he did with sakyo and liked so much that he still keeps them carefully is actually a parent-child thing sakyo did with his own mom!!! it’s like. oh my god.
azami talking abt his own experience with buying cards and then his dad trashing them, though… I. hm. I am going to leave the section abt azami’s bio dad alone bc I’m tempted to get mean about it and I kind of want to leave that for later.
so, skipping forward to the actual play… it was so cool to see summer come in for support! and I always love seeing how the chapters extend what we see in the actual play. also the voice acting that’s good too. the one thing I noticed was like. “you remember the boy with brown hair you killed three years ago?” who’s going to tell them that taichis hair is as red as ever. so roy’s hair was never brown. it got kinda brown when he became undead? but before I don’t think it was.
cannot believe those asshole delinquents were the ones who almost hit azami. the title “buff high schooler” is just rly funny to me tho. sakoda chasing after azami and then calling everyone was so good of him. smart choice my guy. love how everyone in autumn (minus taichi who seems a little nervous) is like. it’s fighting time. very cool to see all of natsugumi volunteer to be opening act. was confused by the “I always repay my debts” line but I think it’s for banri acting as stand in for kumon? which is nice bc it’s like. tenma is the one saying this so it rly just gives the idea that like. natsugumi is a team yknow. and later when they do the acting it meshes so well with the actual play? bc like they had a specific point where they were like oh let’s adlib and do some comedy that’s undead related to make sure the play isn’t a bummer. and then here’s natsugumi just doing like those sorts of jokes.
anyways back to azamis kidnapping.
muku: won’t it be bad if they see ur faces?
me: …ah. I have. the faintest idea of where this is going [judo bear nozaki flashes to my head]
THE CG WAS. THE BEST POSSIBLE USE OF A CG EVER ITS SO GOOD. I LOST MY SHIT. THE HOLLOW EYES R KINDA TERRIFYING IN A REALLY FUNNY WAY. TAICHI THIS WAS AN AMAZING IDEA. the guitar / bass guitar (? idk instruments) that rolls in during this scene is amazingggg. it’s just the like instrumental break part of respawn which is. I went and listened to that after finishing boyhood collage and the song is like, sooooo good. much love to it. the rly fast vocal parts made me think of the fast parts of worlds end dancehall. which is like also apocalyptic setting so that was cool. also I love worlds end dancehall.
they were so funny during this tho. sakyo going “roooar. give us back our friend, you punkass kids.” and juza forgetting what bears sound like so he just literally goes “beaaarrrr” what are you a Pokémon?
and sakoda running towards azami!!! <3 I grew soooo much affection for sakoda in this story tbh like he takes care of azami so well!
thought it was very interesting that like. when they return, everyone in natsugumi is audibly exhausted minus tenma (he’s probably got great acting stamina) and misumi (I don’t think he says any lines here? but he’s probably just got excellent physical stamina. and he and tenma did start out with the like best acting chops of the troupe) which is a cool detail.
and then azami just carefully opening up that he was terrified. not of being hit but of disappointing them and the play. and then when he says to sakyo… “I’m only saying this once, but when I was a kid, I always thought of you as my dad. And… I still do.” IM GOING TO CRY. idk. like the way that azami just Says That and let’s it hang there and then they do the play.
izumi: wow the fight scenes r intense today! (please don’t tell me it’s bc they were just actually fighting…)
damn izumi what do u want me to tell you then. huh. they stomped in their with their animal heads and azami pirouetted back to mankai? no violence involved?
and sakoda crying at the play!! again I can hear the smile in azamis voice when sakodas like bawling in front of him. when azami was like. shift couldn’t make it…? I paused and was like. azami implied shift had an interest in theater at the end of act 2 summer… could it be… and then when azami was like “the god troupe, huh…” I was like ahhhh fuck. we shall see what goes on there later ig.
also they bring up vkei again when talking abt what they want to do next and izumi shut it down… what do u have against it! honestly eyes emoji at masumi saying he likes it, tho... mazumi expressing an opinion that doesnt align with izumi's personal tastes??? maybe I’m missing something.
but the ENDING!!!!!
citron: "I have reached my limit..." AND THEN GUYS THERE HES LITERALLY THERE!!!!! I’m assuming the <> for their dialogue means they’re speaking in their native tongue anyways im going to obsess over <Citronia.> <I've come to get you.> / <I've been wondering when you'd get here.> I knew guy was coming to get citron so I’m glad to see that’s confirmed… already gave my theories on the specifics so I’m interested to see if I’m anywhere close to the mark there.
okay and Now I can talk abt azamis bio dad. i. uh. I hate him. actually he really grinds my gears in a way I didn’t think was going to happen. so I’m worried that I’m being like somewhat unfair to him bc I’m projecting my own biases onto him. so I’m sorry if u have like good opinions of him. it’s rly so funny tho I knew azami did like makeup and stuff and I was like “oh I have. No Interest in makeup or skincare so I probably won’t relate to it too hard” and then This happened and it’s like I got hit with a bowling ball.
like goddd. the way azami is like yeah I bought some cards with my allowance, and then my dad who’s not sakyo found out and threw them out. “I learned then to never let my dad get his hands on anything I’d bought with my own money” gah… not to overshare but like, I feel azami so much there. growing up I would like. never want to tell my parents I liked Anything bc I knew they’d be like oh you’re so silly and dumb and stupid for wanting any kind of merch or collectibles! it’s such a hassle!! why do u like this stupid thing!! so. ahah. I went to a concert for the first time this year and I remember my parents thinking it was weird but then one day my dad called me and he was like oh I was talking to a colleague abt the concert you’re going too and he says that band you like is like, super cool and popular. so it’s like ah. ig now that an Adult has approved it I’m a cool kid now. the same way my writing was worth shit and was totally useless until a family friend kept gushing about the way I’d helped their daughter. anyways what I’m saying it is azami I get it.
and his dad then trashed his makeup, too… like the way sakyos defense for the handmade cards were that they were like “yakuza” cards so he couldn’t complain like it’s a flimsy defense but the fact that he even had to like, make a Justification about these cards when it’s like. these handmade cards aren’t going to help azami fit in or make friends at all so like they’re not accomplishing what the store bought ones were for. but like you still need to defend against it.
but yeah the way it’s like. wow at a pretty young age azami was like oh okay. so if I like ANYTHING I can’t tell my dad about it or he might ruin it. do I feel that this is perhaps part of why he seems so cautionary abt romance yeah sure.
the first time I actually teared up during this whole thing was actually sakyo in the hospital telling azami not to give up. that he can do it even in defiance of his parents. and it’s so meaningful bc sakyos like his DAD. and he’s telling him he’ll support him… like idk. something so heartwarming abt a parental figure being like, hey, you need to prize yourself to the point that if needs must, you can even rebel against me.
the conversation sakyo and izumi have after that, too… “after seeing my boss, I get the feeling there’s no dad out there who doesn’t care about his kids.” this line makes me feel. So Complicated. like I won’t deny the fact that I think azamis dad cares for him on…. Some level…. but it’s like homares grandmother. im glad she loved him but it doesn’t erase the ways that she hurt him, yknow?
also sakyo. you live with misumi tenma and masumi. masumi you can maybe argue his dad caring abt him and same with tenma (but. I mean I’m not HAPPY abt arguing that bc they r rly under baseline care.) but anyways are u gonna do that with misumi’s dad. then again probably only summer troupe knows about the situation there… honestly sakyo probably knows nothing abt the tenma situation too. so he’d only know about masumi and masumis dad seemed like fairly reasonable and nice at the end.
sakoda was so cool here tho. first off having the nerve to even try to still lie about the tickets to protect azami. and then when azami got dragged to his bio dad the fact that sakoda just. started yelling at him? amazing. this made me cry again. like yeah sakodas been watching him… what azamis doing isn’t child’s play! he’s right! and sakoda knows all of this bc he’s been caring abt that kid for forever!! to the point that he’ll yell at the yakuza head like this bc he cares that much!!!
and azami is like. god. I rly love the way he was like. so openly resentful. “Since when have you ever been a father to me?! Dont pull that shit on me now!” ouch. so true though.
and the. the way that uh. “Wh-what are you bowing for? This asshole doesn’t deserve—“ you can HEAR the trembling in his voice. he’s holding back tears. sakyo bowing FOR azami is so good. like I think this scene hit me so hard bc like both sakoda and sakyo who have the lives they do now mostly in thanks to the ginsenkai, are like… sticking up for azami. who is fifteen and thus hasn’t really Given them anything but like his presence. and they care enough about him to stick up for him anyways.
anyways I hadn’t thought abt this until now but it’s like huh… yeah no wonder azami made something up. he wouldn’t want to talk abt sakyo in front of sakyo bc that would be like admitting he still cared abt him. and he didn’t want to talk abt his parents in front of sakyo bc uh. it would be complicated ofc. like in his boyhood collage he was like oh I don’t even remember why I ran away, but shift was probably frustrated and stuff. but like clearly azamis mom had just recently died at that point. he probably just didn’t want to talk about that.
the reveal that the magic brush he uses on kumon was his mothers makeup brush, though… like the way it was her cheek blush to make herself look less sick. and he does the same thing for kumon years later. it just makes it… so much more affectionate. ”I wanted to use its magic to make someone happy like that again. I wanted to do for someone else what I could no longer do for my mom.” and YOU DID!!!
and then his bio dad’s response to all of this. “well, aren’t you all just making me out to be some evil villain. you think there’s a parent out there who doesn’t want to support his child’s dreams?” yes. yes absolutely.
and the way his reasoning is just like. he just thought azami was making up excuses to run away from the family. that uh. that’s not. true… ugh this part is what made me so frustrated. like azami, after his portrait, so very specifically asserts that’s he’s his son and because of that he’ll do anything for him and ginsenkai family. and it’s like. Yeah. I know what it’s like to be so aware of your position as someone’s child and know that even as you hate them you will also do anything for them even if they won’t recognize that. like… he never even asked. azami was so pissed about getting his makeup trashed that he literally ran away and didn’t come back. and you’re still assuming oh it was a little side hobby, if he REALLY cared about it he would’ve, what, psychic mind beamed the force of his feelings to you? if you had paid attention like sakyo or sakoda you would’ve clearly seen how long and how deeply he’s loved it for. even if it had been for a short time how would you know it wouldn’t grow into something else, anyways. like acting.
also his “study your ass off and aim for the top.” line about makeup and then when he gifts him the makeup set later… good on him for personally buying that stuff. but that line left such a sour taste for me bc it’s like. ugh… honestly it just hit a sore spot bc I remember my parents being like. hi child. you can do like, anything you want supposedly but if you want to do like Anything in the humanities field or arts field you’ll have to be the top 1% of it otherwise you’ll die alone. so like if you’re not good enough to do that just quit (I am implying you’re not good enough). and it’s just like. idk. the sort of implications that if azamis not like the best at makeup ever and also that if he hadn’t chosen to do it bc of his mother and it was just something he Liked, then that reason wouldn’t be enough…? that’s just the vibe I get.
also azamis bio dad being like sigh I’ll tell sayuri you’ve become a strong independent man instead of the family head. it just rly irks me like. even now it felt like hey old man. are you looking more at your dead wife than you’re looking at your actual child. because that’s what it feels like.
anyways idk. I hope azami has more space later in life to be a bit more resentful bc I think he deserves it, yknow? I think the way the whole thing went down like, Made Sense bc why would that guy like admit he had hurt his son… that’s like. unrealistic. so I don’t think the story was written badly or anything. it just made me like. really sad. azami didn’t end up loudly crying (im not counting the wailing he has to do in the play for his dead dad.) and like that makes sense to me. actually I think it was very Cool Of Him to never lose his composure That Badly. uh and he’s going to do great considering he as a middle schooler is like rolling normally with college students. but I just want him to be like. feel safe even when he’s not excelling, yknow?
I fear I lost the plot or rambled a bit too hard there at the end, so sorry if it’s incoherent!! I rly like azami!! this was a very good story. im also ridiculously excited for winter.
HUH OH. SORRY ABOUT THAT LMAO. a3 relatability strikes again?
let's go into it!
dFKJDFKLFDJ zombie fun night is perfect. Banri is really being a good leader and figuring out how to have Azami engage with what they're going to do it's just. god Banri is good.
HELPP. Tenma scaredycat, but also for the lizard thing, so valid, i would do the same. AND HELP for the necklace. This is so funny. and yeah Azami's makeup skills truly are shining there! DLKFJDKLFJD being so used to a3 dropping emotional bombs that this just ended up being funny makes it even softer. But yeah agreed on the way Banri coaches him and still encourages him even though it's obvious Azami doesn't feel the same way about theater yet. For Banri who went from uninterested to "this is my whole life actually", it must be jarring to look at this past mirror, but even more reasons to take it easy.
God the Omi and Azami scene was so good. (friend was staring into oblivion during this whole scene and then cursed me. I would love to be all awww but i couldn't stop laughing.)
But yeah it was so nice that like, so many of them worked together in trying to help out? like it really shows that they're really all a family and a community now, and they'll try to help with their newest members as well. AND AWW. yeah Summer is happiness itself. always missing them. even Azami cannot resist them.
BUT YEAH Azami's awkwardness aroound Omi is just. man. Exactly as you say, it's just, difficult to approach right. but yeah it does serve to justify why it goes smoothly with Kumon on the other hand. Omimi's portrait… just, absolutely heartbreaking again as always. I wonder if Omi did take a break when he was being a delinquant and therefore is doubling down on being of service because he still feels guilty for this time. or if him joining the theater troupe is his vision of taking a break since it means his family has to handle things on their own. Or maybe like Juza and Taichi he's just being too hard on himself.
JUZA SO GOOD. ALWAYS.
and here's the meat of it! yes that CGI was so good man. You really feel just how important Azami is to Sakyo in that image. Also if i recall correctly, Kumon panicked over the phone so they really all expected it to be bad while it was just, Kumon panicking, which somewhat makes it even funnier to me. Anyway. Sakyo good dad. that's all i'd say. god this scene is so emo. AND YESS SOBS THE CARDS STUFF. IT'S GENUINELY SO EMO. Azami not able to believe Sakyo would care this much while of course Sakyo does, come on and it's just. god this arc. God the whole way you describe Azami's thoughtprocess is bringing me to tears. I feel like this is exactly how he felt it yeah. Sakyo is worrying about how he "betrayed" Azami by leaving while Azami would have been just fine with it if it didn't feel like Sakyo was abandonning him and only thinking of him as a duty, and it's just. godd. and goddd the way you describe the rest i'm just. soso emo. They really have a neat relationship, a hurt neither of them were able to explain to the other and therefore they hurt one another like that, but they genuinely care so much and want to be part of each other's lives and and y'know what Azami maybe Sakyo is the only dad you need.
SUMMER SO COOL YEAH!! And yeah the play is pretty nice, though yeah. I guess with Azami at makeup they tried new hair things but Taichi's hair stayed too red for it all smh! but i guess in a huge theater it might not matter so much.
SAKODA IS SOOOO GOOD, UNSUNG MVP OF THIS EPISODE. yeah for Tenma's "i always repay my debts" it's about how Autumn helped Kumon out, so Summer is going to help Autumn and Azami out as well basically. And yeah Tenma definitely see them as a team, he's Natsugumi's leader and therefore he speaks for and takes debts for all of Natsugumi. What a lad. But Natsugumi did such a good job and i love how hard they helped on this one. truly MVPs.
Also yes i love how all of Autumn was ready to fight except Taichi who was nervous, but i love even more that it's Taichi who comes up with the plan on how to infiltrate the base. Really reminding us that he was with the "Bad Boys" because of spy related crimes by how he can come up with plans to infiltrate stuff, but also i love this so much. It's kinda where i started to have my headcanon of "Taichi is scaryingly smart when it comes to illegal stuff". Like the idea of Taichi messing up say, simple math, but coming up with an infiltration plan that would even have Chikage pause is one of my favorit headcanons ever, and it all started because of this.
BUT YES THE CG WAS SO GODDAMN PERFECT. IT'S ONE OF MY FAV CG EVER IT'S SO FUNNY. And with the song in the back, it was GLORIOUS. i'm glad you liked Respawn!!!! it's such a neat song! Also i need to share this stage video: https://www.tumblr.com/icharchivist/708632707674079232?source=share
BUT YEAH it was so funny and i lOVE that they were dedicated in like, actually playing their animals like. dguys you didn't HAVE to. you're just so funny. AND JUZA'S "BEAAAR", it's so good. I love them so much.
Sakoda MPV <33333 he really does take care of Azami so well it's really soft.
And yeah Summer's exhaustion is a nice detail. god it makes me wonder for how long they went on, a wonder the public didn't get weirded out by it.
AND SOBS YEAH AZAMI'S SPEECH. YEAH. And also the "maybe it's because i have two assholes dad that i turned into such an asshole" with a bright smile on his face. god he's so good.
And eheheh for Shift, but, yeah. yeah…. AND SAKODA REALLY GOOD. and please just let them having some vkei related play it's all good!! it's worth it!! maybe this time none of you would oppose Juza wearing a dress if the whole thing is about being scared he wouldn't look feminine enough smh!! AND LDKJFKLDFJD MASUMI'S RARE INDIVIDUALISTIC MOMENT.
AND THAT ENDING!!! yeah < > are for foreign languages in general, and in their case it's their native one. But finally. Guy teasing just to build up to it now!!!
Ok so, now, Azami's dad.
"my dad who's not Sakyo" i love that we're carrying it on on "Real Dad Sakyo" and "Not Sakyo Dad", it says everything.
And i'm all good with the oversharing as long as you're comfortable with it, and man. Yeah i feel you on that, my family is pretty much the same. I've also had my family like, throw out or destroy my stuff, important stuff, either without my knowledge or in front of me, so to say i felt Azami really hard would be an understatement. It's a whole level of violation that is just, really hard to swallow and forgive. Impossible even.
Honestly the whole writings over the problematic dads of Mankai, in the whole story, is so conflicting to me in general. I feel like. The issue is that most of the bad parents we meet don't have anything else going for them, the only thing we know about them per se is their function in society, and that they're bad with their kids. They're tools for their kids's backstory more than actual people. And i feel like Azami's dad actually sounds like a real person. A conflicting, messed up person with his own issues, and that ends up hurting Azami as a result. There's a difficulty to reconcile how the dad took good care of Sakyo as a kid for instance, to how he behaved with Azami, and it's really unnerving in general. And as such it puts Sakyo in a position of wanting to defend the man because he owes him so much, and it's difficult to blame him for that, but as a result Azami loses one of his major support.
Honestly my feelings about Azami's dad are complicated. I believe he's the one father of Mankai who can actually realistically work on his issues and improves his relationship with Azami. I believe he cares for Azami on some level more than just material (in opposition to how i'd consider Tenma's, who cared for his carreer more, and Masumi's, who only cared when he needed to fill his divorce's loneliness, and well, Misumi's don't care.). So i end up believing there is a possibility still for this relationship to improve in a realistic way that doesn't feel just like a deus ex machina like the others dads have been. but god, this particular brand of neglect and mistreatment truly also struck a core with me and therefore i can't totally go unbiased about it and ends up just, uncomfortable and unsure. It's so complicated.
Mostly i'd say my different approach is that, even if Tenma, Masumi or Misumi wants to work things out with their dad, i would be completely opposed to it. Purely "why the fuck, no, that's not worth it" at them. But if Azami wants to work it out it's like. "Fine. just stay safe, know you can remove yourself from it whenever you feel like it, and remember to be yourself, and bail out anytime something would go out of hands". yaknow?
But yeah i agree i feel like it really puts Azami in a position of hypervigilence. Everything had to always be a secret, calculated, you only show to your father what you're ready to defend, and it would make some stuff like romance or passions in general, stuff that leaves you emotionally vulnerable, as something that's just too much risk for very little reward. So you just closes in completely.
so Sakyo being there and actually showing him that he can just be himself and he doesn't have to worry more ahead of it is meaningful because yeah, like you say, it gives him a parental figure who is actually willing to let him experiment and be free without having to always be prepared to defend why you want to do something.
“after seeing my boss, I get the feeling there’s no dad out there who doesn’t care about his kids.” i actually really hate this line in a sense, i know Sakyo is mostly just, extrapolating to what he's seeing now, but i hate it on a personal level. I do think Azami's dad cares for Azami, but yeah exactly like you said, like Homare's grandma, his own issues means he hurt Azami in ways that are ways too deep for love to just be enough. Sometimes parents love you and hurt you more than a parent who would merely tolerate you. Because they love you so much they want to make sure you're well fitted to the world and ends up messing you up as a result.
But yeah god, i'm glad we're on the same page, you can't say "all dads care for their kids" when you're living with those kids, and Misumi's in particular. This makes me see so red. I get Sakyo has a personal bias here but giod. but yeah Sakyo probably only knows about Masumi's and yeah, Masumi's dad was reasonable at the end that he might work it out. but also like, didn't Sakyo's dad abandon hm and his mom?! that the whole reason his mom had a hard time in life was because of that? bc i don't remember if Sakyo's absent dad is due to abandon or death. Bc if it's abandon, i feel like Sakyo shouldn't be the one saying all dad cares yaknow? I still think that, the Wastonian reasons of it all, is because Sakyo owes so much to the Boss that he tries to rationalize things in his favor yaknow? But the Doylist reason, i think, is mostly that the one weakness of a3's writing is truly with how they manage to create realistic scenarios of abuses and the way it affects the kids, but then they want to solve it with the parents going "my bad", and the problem is that it's not how coping with abuse works yaknow.
SAKODA IS SOOO COOL HERE YEAH. Like man, the glow up Sakoda got in this arc with how much he would go to hell for this kid and fight the devil himself if he had to. god. unsung mvp.
Azami is totally entitled to throw that at his father's face, go Azami go.
" sakyo bowing FOR azami is so good. like I think this scene hit me so hard bc like both sakoda and sakyo who have the lives they do now mostly in thanks to the ginsenkai, are like… sticking up for azami. who is fifteen and thus hasn’t really Given them anything but like his presence. and they care enough about him to stick up for him anyways. " OGHHH SO TRUE. THIS IS REALLY SO. SO GOOD.
and you're right about Azami's collage being the way it was. It makes sense Azami just didn't want to share this vulnerability, especially with Sakyo, at a point where he still believed Sakyo didn't care for him on top of that. It's really just. man.
SOBS AND YEAH FOR THE MAGIC BRUSH….
"and then his bio dad’s response to all of this. “well, aren’t you all just making me out to be some evil villain. you think there’s a parent out there who doesn’t want to support his child’s dreams?” yes. yes absolutely. " DJFHDL LEGIT. GOD.
But yeah i feel you on everything else you mention about Azami's dad it's just. Acting like Azami was at fault for not making it clear he was serious, while also making the environment too hostile for Azami to even come out and say that. He's responsible for how Azami couldn't trust him and then he blames Azami for not trusting him in a sense. It's really frustrating, and it feels like he's deflecting the blame, while also kinda taking the blame itself. I'm glad he's trying to fix things, and i do think he feels guilty, but it's still so sour.
and i'm so sorry your parents made you feel all those things :( but yeah i totally get what you mean on how it relates to Azami. It's just so unfair to put on him the pressure to be the best of the best.
In a sense i feel it fits a lot of the thematic of Autumn of like… The reasons they have Regrets to start with is because of the expectations people have put on them, whenever it is over their abilities (Banri) or their appearance (Juza) or their age (Sakyo) ect. And i feel like Azami is in this situation where he's about to regret it if he doesn't take his own life in between his hands. He has to break free from those expectations and fights for what he wants. but god. He shouldn't have to fight for it. ig you can't expect Yakuza to do things the easy way, but god he really shouldn't have to fight for it it makes me so sad.
"are you looking more at your dead wife than you’re looking at your actual child" so true unfortunately hhhh.
But yeah i hope Azami gets more ways to process everything later on :/
I do think that, out of all the bad fathers' plotline, like i said, this is the most realistic one in a sense, and i do think it's well written in general. And i do think that when it comes to abused/neglected kids and their parents, there is also just… i know online the consensus is "children should just cut ties with their toxic parents" and i get how it's the easiest way to see it, to free yourself for good for the influence, but it comes with its own type of downsides that are rarely discussed and is also a lot of pressure to put on a kid. Obviously, if it's too toxic it SHOULD be the case, like i said, chara like Misumi in particular are better off moving past it, but i feel like, in Azami's situation, where despite all the hurt and all the pain, Azami still definitely see his father as a human whom he wants to work things out with… It's just really complicated. I have really messy feelings about all of this.
I do hope Azami would manage to be more resentful and end up being able to actually discuss with his dad and challenge him like, no, YOUR behavior was truly fucked up, it's not fair to ask of ME to communicate my feelings better when you never tried to listen, yaknow?
Anyway i do feel like this sort of… complicated messy conflicting feelings of resentment and yet wanting to work it out that is in Azami and his father's storyline, for how fucked up his father is, actually works very well and is very realistic, even if there would be wishes for Azami not to bother at all for it. I feel like it allows Azami the grace of having really mixed feelings about all of this without going to one extreme or the next about how to be with his father, and it's something i really personally connected with, as someone with a very difficult relationship with my family, who thought cutting ties was my best solution at some point, and now as an adult, have to deal with how while i could never ever forgive them, the other extreme isn't satisfying to me, on multiple levels. I don't like his father, but i want Azami to be able to work it out in the way he would consider satisfying, and i think that the story is written in a way that leaves this approach possible and addresses it as such, in a way i think the others bad dads of Mankai get too much of a free pass. but man. messy. And with the patern of bad dads getting off too easily this can come up as much more sour than the conflicting feelings it could have actually worked on if the others dads were treated accordingly imo.
Azami's storyarc genuinely did hit hard for me as well because of that. He's not a chara i particularly relate to outside of this specific plotline but this plotline hits not only very deep, but on mixed feelings that are hard for me to face in fiction, so it's always hard to look at.
On the light hearted side, my friend we talked about was cursing me the whole storyarc bc of how he related to Azami and then Azami's portrait happened and he genuinely just went "okay you know what fuck you" and was so emotionally damaged by the mirror that i could forget for a bit my own pain by letting him suffer a bit. Terrible friend moment.
Anyway!!! it's all good, i'm glad you did ramble, it was really nice to read and well, it's interesting things to think about, even if the conclusion isn't easily clear cut.
I'm really glad you liked Azami and his story!!!
And ehehe Winter soon <3333
And "Conquering Misoshiosa Island!" first!
Take care and always feel free to ramble <333
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the-kipsabian · 2 years
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vampire!kip but his gf penny is actually human
she helps him style his hair and do his makeup since kip cant see his own reflection. this also leads into daily affirmations that he looks great in his silly little outfits
my canon is and has always been that you cant photograph vampires even with modern technology, so all their couple selfies would just be of her. kip would always be somewhere in the background tho, and only penny would ever be aware. this gets hilarious social media response when she posts something like “date night ❤” with a supposed couple selfie but its just her. ppl just think that shes a strong independent woman who needs no man, even tho hes just. right there. they just cant see him tbh. she mostly just explains this with kip being camera shy and not wanting a social media presence
cause people have seen them in public together. on dinners together. at the movies. and whatnot. she has introduced him to her friends (and vice versa i guess? idk who kips supernatural friends in this au are yet lol), they all know he exists
he is a sunglasses at night kinda guy. he has probably way too many pairs of those. he dont care he thinks he looks good. so sunglasses at night.. and if he needs to go out for whatever while the sun is out, a cardboard box it is. its not perfect, but it sure is something
painted nails (thanks penny), flawless eyeliner (thanks penny), pretty dyed hair (thanks penny), matching outfits (thanks penny)
tho he also still wears crop tops. cause ofc he does. midriff and arms? yes please hes got nothing to hide. he just gets extremely self-conscious about this at times tho, considering he cant be posting thirst traps. it kinda makes him sad tbh
kip also doesnt feed off of penny. she would let him, but he doesnt wanna risk it (maybe at moments of passion he slips but its never serious). thankfully hes still an absolute thot tho so he can just go out and work it out. penny is absolutely fine with this tbh cause she knows he loves her no matter what and she trusts him
hes a posh bastard that drinks monster (and other energy drinks) out of wine glasses. that is all
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deeeelightfuldee · 2 years
Text
What is sad for you right now?
All the stuff with K has me pretty bummed. Its really hard to move on and its hard how little he appears to be bothered.
Has something really heavy ever fallen on you?
yes
If you wear makeup, what colors do you usually wear?
Neutrals. A lot of brown, cream, pink
Does your shower have curtains or a glass door/wall?
My old one was a curtain my current one is a glass door thing.
If you have more than one pet, do they ever get jealous of each other?
I have two kitties. They don’t like one another so yes, they get jealous if attention is paid to either. 
Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in?
A bathroom lol. 
Do you remember the last question you were asked? What did you answer?
“Do you ever go back and reread our conversations” and “is your face red from what i just said” are the last two that came in at the same timestamp apparently..
Besides salt and butter, do you put anything on your popcorn?
Not usually
Are you lonely?
I am but it will get better. It has to. 
What’s your favorite magazine to read?
Gosh i love looking at bridal magazines. 
Do you like pineapple?
yes
Have you ever seen fireflies?
Of course.
Have you ever trespassed?
Oh probably, sure. 
Do you tell your parents where you are going?
Not always. I dont talk to my dad, period. Mom isn’t always home so i dont always but i most of the time will. Theres no reason not to.
Do you raise your hand or participate in class?
I always did. I was often thanked repeatedly for participation. 
Do you like visiting the mall? Why or why not?
Ehhh its so expensive. I do like the food court tho.
Have you ever purposely hurt an animal?
Omg no. absolutely not.
Would you ever see a therapist?
I would love to if i could afford it
Are you afraid of heights?
Not really, no
Are you afraid of the dark?
No, not unless theres reason to be
Are you a jealous person?
No, not usually. Some of my most strongest jealousy pangs were from how K was when his friend was in town. Idk, i used to just crave his time so much, im not usually that type.
When is your birthday?
july
What are you listening to right now?
The football game
Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing?
Lol sure. When i was a kid mom saw us eating a tub of frosting. Oh well
Are you still friends with someone from kindergarten?
yes
What is the most important thing to you?
My fam and my loved ones.
Do you like whipped cream?
absolutely.
Are you close to your mother?
Yup. we definitely are close
Are you close to your father?
No. i don’t speak with him nor do i see him.
Do you walk around bare foot when you’re at home? Or do you wear socks?
I try not to be barefoot if i can help it. I try to be wearing slippers.
What did you eat today?
I haven’t eaten at all today. I just panic ordered a mcchicken so i can sleep. I don’t have the money for that, but i was about to freakin lose it lol
Would you ever be your school’s mascot who wears that costume?
I was homeschooled so it wasnt an option
Would you rather see the Great Wall of China or Big Ben?
Big ben
Have you ever written a poem?
Sure as a kid lol
Would you ever be a tornado chaser?
I tried to chase a tornado with mom like 2 years ago lol.
What is your favorite thing to eat with bbq sauce, if you even like that stuff?
Wings or grilled chicken
Your parents tell you that this summer, you get to pick the vacation. Where do you plan to go?
europe
What do you think is a good theme for a prom?
Uhhhhhhh i have no idea.
Have you ever had to do a class in summer school?
I never *had* to, i always did because i desired to. I miss it.
Do you get nervous when you go to the doctor? About what?
Oh gosh sure. I hate going. I have a bit of medical trauma tbh
Have you ever been to the rainforest?
nope
Have you ever created a website?
Uhhhhhh no
Ever thought about writing a book?
Of course, ive thought about it.
Have you ever had a dream where you killed someone?
No, not to my knowledge. Thats horrifying. 
Do you ever make up stories in your head and wish they come true?
Every single day. In fact, thats how i put myself to sleep lol.
Which is worse: stuffy nose or runny nose?
Runny by far.
Which is worse: Sick to your stomach or sore throat?
Sick to my stomach. I hate nausea.
Do you think your last relationship was a disaster?
Disaster? No. 
Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube?
I dont think so. Ive never really tried.
Who do you think is the easiest to talk to?
Ummmmm honestly it was always K. i think its still K.
Would you consider yourself to be emo?
Emotionally intelligent lol
Do you have a favourite metal band or do you not like metal?
No favorite, but i dont hate it
What is your current desktop picture?
Its a scenic one that came with the computer. 
Thick or thin blanket?
Depends if the AC is on
Who are your favorite bands?
I literally listen to everything
How do you mark through your word search puzzles?
If i have a crayon or pencil ill color it in but otherwise circle 
Have you ever sewn something?
Many times
What did you eat for dinner last night?
Ice cream
Ever been grounded?
once
Have you seen all of the Jaws movies?
No.
When was the last time you played cards? (not on the computer)
This week. Im working thru a book that teaches you how to play card games solo cus no one plays with me really
Have you ever drank Cherry Coke?
Yeah. but regular coke anything irritates me because it makes my teeth feel gritty
Have you ever had a black eye?
yea.
Have you ever eaten a bug?
Ew i hope not
Do you like pranking people?
Nope, not at all. Im not the type that finds pranks funny, either. Did you ever take a cooking class in school?
In a way
Do you celebrate St. Patrick’s Day?
Lol no not really. Im not irish at all. But i think its cute
Do you use Skype?
Once in a while to check up on CM people. But usually i use whatsapp or marcopolo 
Have you ever participated in local magazine cover girl searches?
wut
Have you ever been called a skank/slut because of the way you dress?
Lol one time a guy who was SO bent on getting with me (despite me being not interested) use to say i was a slut because of the way i dress (which.. Is ridiculously hilarious if you know me and know how i dress)
Is your ex sexually attractive to you still? Very much so. Very, very much so.
Describe the most romantic moment you’ve ever had.
Oooo boy. Ive never really thought about that in a comparative manner.
Have you ever been to couple’s counseling?
No
How often does your employer ask you to work overtime?
Not really applicable currently. But previously, my employer used to ask ALL the time. 
Did you often read for fun when you were a kid?
Always. I always had my nose in a book
When was the last time you were scared?
A health scare two days ago.
What’s your favorite song by Rihanna?
I always loved unfaithful, love on the brain, break it off, we ride, russian roulette, rude boy, s&m, cheers, SKIN. probably skin is my fave.
Can you speak binary?
Nope.
Would you rather live somewhere that had hurricanes or tornadoes?
Tornadoes i suppose
Have you ever had a pet that you disliked?
Lol uhhhhh ive had some that lived in my house that ive been less fond of. But not my own
When was the last time you saw hail?
This summer
What is on your mind right this second:
I hate this question. I am wondering why K is so ok with losing me and im wondering why im so easy to let go of.
Have you ever given a nickname to your pet(s)?
All the time. Currently the top ones as of late are Beanie Baby (benny) and Lottle full throttle (Lottie)
When was the last time you shaved your legs?
Couple days ago
Do you ever try free samples at the store?
rarely
Do you like boys with long hair?
Define long. I dont mind like chin length but i usually swoon for full on top.
Do you like root beer?
No i freakin hate it
What is the best fast food place, in your opinion?
Mickeys 4 ever
Do you have faith in yourself?
I do
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peachiimilquetea · 3 years
Note
Literally any other iida ramblings or hcs u have id love to hear lol
ok here are a few more of my fave things to think about regarding this man:
educational dates.
it sounds like its supposed to be boring but idk personally i love to learn and explore shit
so like watching documentaries together in the dorms and going to museums
and AQUARIUMS DAWG
I LOVE THE IDEA OF GOING TO AN AQUARIUM AND WATCHING THE FISH BUT HAVING YOUR DATE WATCH YOU INSTEAD
UNDER THE BLUE LIGHT AND SHIT
ONSHKDLSKFDHSJKFBDSJKFSDB
like you’re so engrossed in the fish and the pretty colors but he’s looking at how the blue light hits your face and how utterly breathtaking you are when you’re full of wonder
anD YOU DONT EVEN NOTICE IT
that just screams iida to me idk
he sleeps like hes dead
he literally sleeps like a log i dont make the rules
literally sprawled out limbs flailing everywhere
but hes great for cuddling bc hes not completely muscle hes like that inbetween where hes just built like a tree omg
he might crush you tho so you have to be little spoon usually
he likes being little spoon tho
he prefers it honestly
uhhhh
he likes giving piggy back rides bc he likes when you play with the hair at the base of his neck and talk directly in her ear
he saves peoples names in his phone with full first and last like a psychopath probably
he also uses emojis the way they are intended
thinks emoji combinations are the funniest thing in the world
like literally sees them and hes like "THATS SO CREATIVE????" and then he starts using them
petition to make iida say “🕳🏃🏻💨” in a smau BJFKBSJKFDB
married to auto caps for some reason
i also hc that he cannot cook however hes very good at helping you prep meals
so he cant make a full meal but if you need someone to mince garlic or chop up some veggies, hes your guy for sure
much better baker than cook
but still not the best
this might be hyper specific but if you wear makeup he loves watching you do it
always flinches when you put eyelashes/mascara on
this is also true for when you get your nails done (if you get acrylics) he likes to watch your nail tech do their thing
if you ask him what design/color to do he gets flustered but literally has a pinterest board full of ideas he wants to see you do
he also takes messy ass notes
his handwriting is like chicken scratch
literally illegible you cant read anything he says ever
it’s bc his hands can’t keep up with how fast his brain works
but somehow he makes it work???
also he takes notes in blue ink bc of how its supposed to help you retain information
probably uses the Cornell method like a psycho too
his love language is gift giving but in a practical way
anything you mention you need will be waiting at your doorstep by the end of the day
"crap i ran out of eyeliner"
literally finds eyeliner sitting on your bed after you get home from school/work
and he never admits to it either
he just watches you with a small smile as you get excited or thank him because of how much easier he makes your life
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capricores · 4 years
Note
hey, love 💓 hope you’re having a good day. I just discovered I have an Aquarius stellium and I don’t really know what it means 🙃
thank you so much angel! aquarius stellium:
“extrovert-passing introverts” // aquarius stelliums are great at being social, and they like connecting with people, but they tend to hate being social at the exact same time, they like isolation/alone time and can have a pretty short fuse for dealing with people (it’s pretty conflicting! they have a love-hate relationship with being social lol, it highly depends on the house of the aquarius stellium in this case)
they tend to have that “social battery”, but it works both ways. they need social interaction for happiness (esp aquarius moon/venus), but they also usually need a day or three to recharge after social interactions/gatherings
despite their very chill, calm exterior i do find they get irritated and frustrated pretty easily, they have a very low tolerance for people’s bs and they aren’t usually great at hiding their annoyance (mostly because they simply don’t care to; in an aquarian’s mind they don’t generally see why they would hide their emotions for your sake)
surprisingly very stubborn! people expect them to be open since they’re an air sign; and mind you, they are very good at listening and understanding new ideas, concepts, ways of thinking/doing things, etc., but it’s pretty rare for aqua dominant people to change their ways/mind; and if they do it has to be on their own terms & feel like it was their own choice/idea
they can have issues when it comes to embracing & accepting their emotions; they tend to intellectualize and try to rationalize everything they feel (this will depend heavily on the individual’s moon though)
tend to be musically and/or artistically inclined, usually the most talented and creative people you’ll ever meet (i find most aquarians use art/music as an outlet; and a huge chunk of aquarius stelliums i’ve “studied” or read for have made their careers in the art fields)
i’ve noticed they tend to stutter a lot when speaking! aquarian dominant people (esp aquarius moons, mercurys) have this habit of speaking before they’ve actually formed the thought/planned out what they were gonna say: so they kinda of just “sjlkfdjdlkf” irl sometimes or take a while to finish their sentence (scattered speaking style)
they don’t like talking about their emotions/feelings unless they can be self-deprecating about it or make a relatable meme/joke out of it
very analytical people and they overthink anything and everything that people say and do (especially with aquarius moon and/or mercury)
they’re quite blunt, they don’t generally sugarcoat things and can be as cutthroat as aries/capricorn are stereotyped to be
on that note, they often just say what’s on their mind at the time and they don’t intend to hurt people, they just don’t often realize the things they’re saying are hurtful/too blunt
aquarians are very, ‘why would i filter myself for someone? i don’t want people to filter to me’, and it can be hard for them to understand some people’s sensitivities in conversation
they really despise copycat or reflector-type individuals; their biggest turn-offs tend to be those who follow the crowd, don’t think for themselves, mold themselves for others, etc
aquarians can take a really, really long time to fall in love i find, as they tend to not care for it and usually just view people in a “friend way”, but once they find “their person” they are 100000% committed and will probably make big steps (from saying “i love you” to straight up moving in together, marriage, etc) very fast
undeveloped they do run a habit of having “hot and cold” relationships; a tendency to become super attached very fast only to flip the switch and detach shortly after, usually after they lose interest or become too comfortable
on the topic of romance again, aquarians also (or at least as i’ve noticed) do not use “i love you” very easily or lightly, even if they DO love you and you’re best friends/in a committed long-term relationship/etc, they don’t use the phrase very often and tend to save it for very select times
again can have a lot of trouble expressing their feelings and emotions so they can be a bit awkward at first and for a while in relationships
again they’re VERY independent and they need alone/recharging time or they’ll get very frustrated and anxious
they get very protective of their creations, ideas and style; so when they feel they’re being imitated; or when their ideas are criticized; they get extremely upset and defensive 
also very humanitarian!! i’ve noticed despite most aquarians being like “oh i hate the world/society/people/etc” they have this constant, inner need to help people/the environment/the world and tend to be really passionate about it (aquarius energy is very “fuck the world!! im gonna still save it tho”)
aquarian stelliums probably had an emo phase and if they managed to escape it they probably still dress like they’re in their emo phase lol
depending on their ascendant/midheaven they likely have a pretty unique sense of style as well; i find those with strong aquarian influence often wear very “stand out”, “in your face” and original outfits; very much the type to constantly be changing their hair colour & makeup styles as well (they like wearing things or having aesthetics that tend to shock others; they secretly enjoy getting reactions out of people)
these individuals are very committed to their work and hobbies, they tend to put those above everything else in their life. a lot of people forget the aquarian connection to saturn; aquarians are usually very committed to their jobs and work very hard when they’re in the work-zone
their friends tend to be a hugely significant part of their life too; aquarius moons/venuses especially tend to talk about their close friends ALL the time and they’re very, very protective of them (so loyal)
aquarius stelliums tend to have lots of acquaintances but only a few select close friends (and even most of those close friends they don’t fully open up to)
usually struggles with intimacy and vulnerability 
they tend to radiate a lot of natural confidence and security in themselves, despite how insecure they may feel inwardly 
not to stereotype, but they do usually tend to be drawn to obscure, occult or controversial things. often the types to have “weird” hobbies, interests or habits
often very into, or open to, things like astrology, conspiracy theories, spirituality, etc! but they do think very rationally and logically, so they like to analyze and pick apart these things at the same time, they don’t just accept and follow these things (they have no issue with picking apart their own passions and interests either, so if you debate an aquarius they probably already know what you’re gonna say lol)
usually have the nagging desire to be known (whether it be famous, or just accepted/loved by many/friends/family/etc); they likely felt misunderstood and abandoned their entire life (namely in childhood) so now they have a huge craving to be in the spotlight; although they hate admitting this
aquarians have the ability to fit in well with many types of people, yet often in childhood they were excluded and/or subjects of bullying i’ve noticed (oftentimes from their own family), which is part of the reason why they frequently grow up lacking a feeling of “belonging” or feel like “outsiders”; they deep down crave to be accepted and embraced/have fans/supporters
aquarius stelliums often struggle with fears of abandonment which contributes more to their isolation habits and independent “i dont need anyone but me and my spotify playlists” nature
they despise being controlled, tied down or told what to do; often if you tell an aquarius not to do something they’ll go out of their way to do it, even if they initially didn’t want to do said thing lol (the house that’s in aquarius will show the area of life in which they “rebel” the most; or are the most uncontrollable/free/independent) 
random note: i also find aquarius stelliums are frequently very awkward around children/don’t usually desire nor want any at all
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zontiky · 3 years
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okay so i tried to save this ask as a draft and it got deleted because tumblr is just such a functional website like that <3 but the prompt was “the hargreeves as ghosts in the apocalypse with five” or something like that i’m going to scream
this is SUPER long so i’m putting it under the cut hfkjsd
pre-five: the hargreeves siblings are dead. wait i feel a drabble coming on ooh
The Hargreeves siblings are dead.
Ben isn’t very aware of this at first. He’s been dead since 2006 -- he’s quite used to it, by now. What he is aware of, first, is light. Blinding white light. And Vanya, in the middle of it. He doesn’t close his eyes because he can’t feel pain, but if he could he thinks she would have made him blind. There’s light, and heat, and power, and then he closes his eyes anyway because the ceiling is collapsing around him and it’s instinctual.
When he opens them again he sees ash. Ash -- and Klaus.
He’s gotten used to Klaus, too. Klaus has a memorable sort of face; even if he didn’t, Ben has seen it every single day for almost twenty years. He doesn’t know if it’s actually been twenty years, for him. He doesn’t know how time moves for ghosts. Klaus has assured him it moves the same as it does for the living. Ben isn’t sure Klaus, stoned out of his mind, bleeding sluggishly from his arm, knew what he was talking about.
Anyway.
Klaus.
He’s wearing the coat he’s been flaunting around for the past week. His shirt is see-through, with little stars on it, like a pale imitation of the sky. Ben remembers his pants had laces on them, he’s sure they did not a minute ago, before the brightness that threatened to wipe out his very soul -- his soul is all he has left, really. His gaze drifts down anyway, to check.
Yes. Klaus’ pants have laces up the sides.
“No,” Ben says. Klaus is laying in a heap on the ground, his fingers curled like his tendons have been cut.
His lips feel numb because they always feel numb. Because Ben can’t feel at all. He takes a step. “No,” he says again, louder, surer. “No!”
Klaus looks up at him. His makeup is smudged, like it tends to be. His lips are bitten raw, like they tend to be. His hair is a mess, like it tends to be, and like it will be, always, because Klaus isn’t breathing.
Klaus is lying in a heap on the ground. Klaus is standing above his own body. Klaus is reaching for Ben like he’s hoping to touch him for the first time in years. Just when Klaus’ cold, dead, fingers brush his face, a voice from behind says, so quietly, dripping with disbelief: “Ben?”
Ben shuts his eyes and wishes desperately he could cry.
He feels a hand on his shoulder, for the first time in so, so long, but he also doesn’t feel it at all. He feels-but-doesn’t-feel someone turn him around, until they are saying, “Ben? Ben!” and he has no choice but to open his eyes and face the music.
Diego is gripping his shoulders like he is a dying man and Ben is the answer. Behind him, Luther and Allison watch them, stunned silent. Allison’s hands are pressed to her mouth. She looks like she wants to cry. 
And Vanya. Little Vanya, painted white. Her head is hung as her shoulders shake with the weight of the destruction she has so inevitably caused. (Ben would say he always knew she was destined for great things -- but he can’t, because he didn’t.) (Nobody ever said great things had to be good.)
The Hargreeves siblings are dead. Their bodies are strewn across what is left of their childhood home, smouldering and burning, and Ben is very aware of that fact.
righto anyway. so they have an emotional reunion but its also kind of bitter? id have to actually write this for it to make sense so lets skip it for now lol
five shows up
he cannot see them obviously bc theyre all ghosts
god if i did write this it would be such a monster of a fic and would take me like 2 years to finish i already know fhkjdsk
somehow ?? they manage to influence the world around them maybe? idk maybe now that klaus is dead hes sober
or maybe hes high for all eternity?
for the purposes of this au lets say he died sober or in the late stages of withdrawal, and bc ghosts cant feel pain in action hes sober
so EVENTUALLY they figure out how to corporealize bc klaus is like blam wham ghost powers
asdlfk that sounds so stupid im sorry
he would say that tho imho,,, it sounds like something hed say,,,
if i DID write this it would be alternating povs also,,,
ok so out of all of them klaus and ben have the most experience homeless
and while being stuck in an apocalypse is not at all the same thing as being homeless it does help to have some knowledge
five doesnt eat the twinkie!! good for him
dammit okay. theres 2 options we can take here. in the comics five couldnt get back bc he fucked up his math and spent 15 years doing the wrong thing, but if u apply that here, with 6 other ppl checking his work this could be avoided and they end up skipping the whole assassin shtick and just hopping straight back to 2019, ready to prevent the apocalypse
OR five still gets hired for the commission but the sibs are tagging along
i think bc five isnt completely alone in this au unfortunately dolores doesnt exist :((
for each other the 2 paths tho theres also options?? bc they (ghosts) can go back in time and inhabit their past selves bodies? OR they could just,,, cease to exist
IM JUST NOW REALIZING HOW MANY PATHS THIS COULD TAKE,, AAH FUCK
okay gonna split this into parts. this is gonna be so long brace yourselves.
1) they go back in time because math checking and the ghosts swap out for their past selves
after multiple years of being stuck in an apocalypse together i think they would learn to get along with each other. like at least a little bit
which would make it easier for them to prevent the apocalypse
bc theyd:
trust each other more
already know abt the apocalypse and not have to wait for five to grace them all with his knowledge
are working as a team from the very beginning
have open lines of communication
yeah uh. so there
vanya is also already aware of her powers so the whole harold goading her into turning against her family and snapping to wipe out all life on earth thing? yeah that doesnt happen
oh and harold wouldn’t know how to do that in the first place because klaus wouldn’t throw out reggie’s journal! this solves so many problems wtf
there’s still commission issues bc they (and by they i mean five) are on the commission’s radar
so there’s still dope fight scenes sdlkfd pinky promise
okay idk. they stop the apocalypse and everything is okay the end hfkjd
2) they fix the math but only five can go back and the ghosts cease to exist
this is just sad! it would be sad okay! im sad! lets move on
subset of the past one: ben CAN go back with five because he was already dead and time travel affects them differently or something idk
aaaaaa
five & ben dynamic duo would be dope as shit BUT five would not be able to see him... so they use klaus as a middleman fjsdsfd
is there 2 bens? is one ben deleted in favor of the time-traveling ben? i dont know! i dont know my brain is melting
either way shit is happening yall!! obviously klaus is clued in, directly or indirectly it doesnt matter but he is on board the ‘don’t let the entire world end in flames’ train
3) they join the commission and then when five goes back in time they all go back
this is fun because now five is a highly trained assassin who is also lowkey a complete marshmallow for his siblings and once again TEAMWORK WOO
basically the first path but now five has a gun fhsdjk
4) they join the commission but five has to leave them behind and they cease to exist
five with a gun but hes sad now
i didnt go into how much losing his siblings would suck in the prev path but like. it would suck so much. he’s already lost them once if you think about it when he time traveled the first time and yeah he found the adult ghost versions but,, its different
and now suddenly hes stuck with these strange adult versions of the people he knows and he KNOWS them but also he doesnt? at all? they dont have all the years of shared experiences together? and theyre all grown up from the first ‘set’ of siblings he had which for five was like 40+ years ago??
SCREAMS
i have losing my mind disease (self-diagnosed)
subset: five has to leave them behind but they still exist because the commission is out-of-time kind of? idk but they’re still floating around somewhere and come back to impact the plot later or something
yeah idk. literally just wrote them down bc i didnt want them to die^2 hfkjwehd
subset: they still exist but instead of being just Somewhere they’re specifically at the assassination of JFK onwards because thats where five left them and they either go on ghosting and make an appearance in s2 OR they cease because them-wise they havent died yet but that doesnt make sense because ghosts can time travel so nevermind
i dont have the brain energy left to explore this one aaaa
okay jesus christ i think that’s all
I DON’T KNOW. i don’t know. i might write some more of this because honestly it is a very fine flavor of angst + hurt/comfort <3
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crabbng · 3 years
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did this on twitter for hana and bon! i’ll put all their answers under the cut, please enjoy <3
HANA:
1. what's their favorite beverage - alcoholic and/or non-alcoholic? hana likes nice, comforting warm drinks like hot chocolate and apple cider, he hasn't really had experience with alcoholic drinks 2. what's their favorite flavor? (spicy, sweet, sour, etc.) umami tbh, some nice hearty savory stew flavors 3. what's their favorite food? BEEF Clapping hands sign STEW Clapping hands sign he also like sweets, pastries and candies and whatnot 4. breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, snacks - which do they look forward to the most? dinner cause he imagines it as a family meal, and also it's the heartiest meal 5. do they have a food or flavor they absolutely hate? bland things like.. boiled green beans.. like.. wet tasteless vegetables.. he is not a fan but who is tbh 6. can they tolerate spicy food? yeah! he likes some good heat in his meals 7. what is their favorite animal? DRAGONS! cause they're cool. also... because baby. 8. what do they wear to bed? boxers or nothing in his own home, in the castle tho he wears like. pj bottoms. 9. what position do they like to sleep in? curled up around a pillow or in a blanket, or flopped on his belly 10. are they a morning person or a night owl? he would like to be a morning person, but he tends to get excited about whatever he's working on and accidentally staying up late, which then makes him sleep in late.. 11. are they a heavy sleeper or do they wake up easily? HEAVY SLEEPER. the boy sleeps like a rock. 12. it's a rainy day, what will they do cooped up inside all day? hana has a WHOLE ROOM of stuff to work on. he tries to get old tech up and running again (with.. limited resources) or to get it to be useful in other ways. 13. do they have a favorite scent or smell? honestly... musty smell of city that was cut off and unused for a thousand years. 14. what do they smell like? do they wear perfume or cologne? a little bit sweaty, a little musty from hanging out in an abandoned city, a little like oil, wood shavings.. he smells like whatever he's been working on. he tries to just smell neutral around other people. 15. baths or showers? BATHS! BUBBLES! RELAX TIME!! taking time just to be hana. nice. 16. how good are they at cooking? it's not gourmet or anything but he can cook a tasty meal. he's worse at baking but he's practicing!! 17. what's their favorite time of year and why? winter!!! pretty snow.. relaxing quiet.. getting to go inside and get all warm and cozy.. nice. 18. do they have a favorite holiday? tbh i dont know what holidays there are in kos world... i oughta think of that.. but anything with people getting together and celebrating together is something he'd like to participate in someday 19. do they prefer buying or receiving gifts? buying!!!! hana loves giving gifts. tbh he doesn't receive a lot of gifts. maybe like.. a jar of jam one time and it made him cry. he kept the jar. 20. how tall are they, and how do they feel about their height? 4' even. he's fine with his height tbh, his insecurities come in when he thinks about what OTHER people think about his height. he definitely recognizes that he looks different than everyone he's been around. 21. can they play any instruments? not really.. he made a guitar once. was NOT good at it. 22. do they have a nice singing voice? NO! cant keep a tune to save his life, but he's the only one (besides baby) who's heard him sing so it really hasn't mattered 23. do they talk to themselves? YES! it could seem like he's talking to baby, but really... she can be asleep or somewhere else and he's just still talking to himself. who else does he have to talk to?! let him live. 24. do they enjoy music? what kind? tbh he probably enjoys "old timey" music he found in the ancient city so like.. synth pop LMAO 25. do they make friends easily? yes! surprisingly, from his popularity in the town. he had a bad first impression whoops. but he's just very charming and sweet and wants to be your friend. 26. surprise birthday party! how do they react? crying. happy crying. but a lot of crying. he won't stop. please stop crying hana. second surprise party would go over better, he'd just cry at the beginning and then have fun at the party. 27. what is their favorite flower, if they have one? hydrangea.. symbolize heartfelt emotions 28. how does your character feel about wearing jewelry? neutral? i like putting him in a lot of jewelry, but it's not something he'd do himself. besides like. his ear and nose piercings (and the other one lol) those are kind of special. he's had those since before he can remember 29. if they wear jewelry, what's their favorite piece? his teal earrings! he was gifted those (one of the like 2 gifts he's received lol) by someone very important to him 30. fashion forward or fashion disaster? fashion neutral? he's definitely not fashionable when he dresses himself (in the clothes he made himself lmao) but he's not like.. offensively disastrous 31. what kind of underwear does your character wear? boxer briefs? for comfort. that's hana's goal picking out his own clothes. comfort. 32. do they wear makeup? what kind? not regularly but he's not against it. he likes looking pretty. he likes eyeliners especially but will sit there and let u put whatever on his face. 33. do they paint their nails? HELL YEAH he paints his toenails since he works with his hands and it'd chip off. after bath nail painting time. paints baby's claws too. 34. are they quick to get haircuts or do they often let it grow out? after his introduction to the townspeople with his hair that had been grown out for years and NOT well taken care of.. he keeps up with haircuts now. he doesn't want to give people reasons to dislike him lmao 35. do they know how to whistle? through the front gap in his fangs yes 36. or how to braid hair? he knows how to braid his own hair for sure. he hasn't had other hair to practice on but he would know how to braid like.. leather cord or stuff for other crafts projects. so i think he'd be good at it. he'd learn like fancy patterns and such 37. are they scared if anything in nature - bugs, snakes, lightning, being on the water, etc.? lightning and storms definitely. he spent his formative years under a mountain, safe from all that, any sort of dangerous weather freaks him out. 38. have they ever thought they were about to die? not that he remembers. but there were times. 39. how do they react to getting sick? a big baby. snuggled up in a thousand blankets with chicken noodle soup and hot teas. 40. are they afraid of blood? not especially? he's been injured before and had to patch himself up. bad injuries tho... lots of blood..... he wouldn't do great with that. 41. how do they earn money? hana builds and repairs stuff for the town mostly in exchange for produce and such. he doesn't really.. have money. 42. are they satisfied with their occupation or long to do something else? he enjoys helping people, so in that way he's satisfied. he'd rather people were more interested in his side job of repairing old tech and making his own tech stuff but... that's not legal. 43. how creative are they? quite creative! he has a number of different crafting hobbies and is always looking for more. he's not great at like.. like if you gave him a paintbrush and were like 'paint' he would just paint whatever was in front of him. not some imagined thing. 44. do they know how to draw? how skilled are they? he's good at like.. accurately drawn schematics? technical drawings. i dont think he would be great at like. portraits tho. like. he could probably draw an accurate face but it'd like completely lifeless. 45. what do they carry around with them during the day (ie in their pockets, a bag, a purse...) 1) a baby 2) his tablet, that's what's with him all the time.. except rn in the story.. when he is without both.. :( 46. do they have a sweet tooth? OH YEAH. he doesn't get a lot of sweets where he is (he's working on learning how to bake them) so he really enjoys good sweets when he gets his hand on them 47. haute cuisine or cheap eats? hana likes good homemade food, i guess cheap eats would be the closer of the two 48. do they know how to swim? HONESTLY.. PROBABLY NOT.. boy has not been around water much 49. do they have any scars? how did they get them? nah! at this point he is more or less scar free. i'm sure he has a few tiny ones from like.. when baby was playing a bit too wildly or something and he got a nasty little scratch but nothing like... big. 50. what kind of handwriting do they have? neat, messy, cursive, MESSY. like a kid who was never really taught how to write. he usually writes on his tablet, which has been taught how to recognize his handwriting and converts it to readable text.
BON:
bon can be hard so on questions where it's not really applicable now (like.. favorite foods and the like), i'll just go with what WOULD have been the case. when he was younger. 1. what's their favorite beverage - alcoholic and/or non-alcoholic? flavored sparkling waters, he likes the bubbles. he likes high alcohol content drinks, so it does its job. 2. what's their favorite flavor? (spicy, sweet, sour, etc.) he likes fresh, citrus-y flavors, whatever category that slots into. 3. what's their favorite food? THE ALL POWERFUL ORANGE, a good orange is a treat for bon 4. breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, snacks - which do they look forward to the most? snacks, cause he can generally eat them alone and not be judged 5. do they have a food or flavor they absolutely hate? puddings and yogurts and stuff like that, soft foods 6. can they tolerate spicy food? a fair amount, but he does have limits (he will not admit it) 7. what is their favorite animal? farm animals, especially working animals, they're nice and usually calm, bon likes that 8. what do they wear to bed? either whatever he's wearing at the time he knocks out or nothin 9. what position do they like to sleep in? huddled in a corner 10. are they a morning person or a night owl? BOTH! he's not a sleeper. if you find him sleeping its because he was probably up the past 3+ days and he just knocked out. 11. are they a heavy sleeper or do they wake up easily? if he's sleeping cause he hadn't slept the past week, he doesn't wake up easily, but if it's a purposeful rest he wakes up to a pin dropping. also re: bon sleeping, he technically can go without sleep indefinitely but he has to go into his lava form to kinda.. refresh his stats so to speak 12. it's a rainy day, what will they do cooped up inside all day? pre-incident: read! study! practice magic. post-incident: think about mortality and stare at a wall 13. do they have a favorite scent or smell? fresh air on a cool day. but he's also nostalgic about the stink smell of a tavern. 14. what do they smell like? do they wear perfume or cologne? ash and smoke. and on special days ;) burnt flesh ;) he doesn't wear perfume or cologne, he just smells weird all the time. 15. baths or showers? showers, a quick spray down and then he's out of the water as quick as possible. 16. how good are they at cooking? QUITE! bon can cook and he can cook good. he's stayed with a lot of families over the years and learned a lot of good tricks and recipes, plus what he learned from when he was growing up and would somewhat regularly cook for himself. 17. what's their favorite time of year and why? summer. he does well in the heat. also the days are longest. bon likes it when it's light out. 18. do they have a favorite holiday? bon doesn't like holidays! cause holidays come with traditions. and traditions come with expectations. and expectations come with punishments. 19. do they prefer buying or receiving gifts? giving, i guess? receiving gifts can come with a price. but it's nice to give a gift and know you expect nothing in return. 20. how tall are they, and how do they feel about their height? bonk is 5'9", he's fine with it 21. can they play any instruments? YES!!! he can play a variety, his favorites are harp and fiddle, though he also can play a mean flute, though that was mostly from his upbringing so he doesn't like it all too much 22. do they have a nice singing voice? YES!!!!! he has a most beautiful voice. he can rouse a room with a good folk song or bring a room to tears with a mournful ballad 23. do they talk to themselves? ahahaha yes. we have already seen this in comic. bon struggles with differentiating between reality and his.. imagination i guess. so. that can often lead to him just talking to himself. 24. do they enjoy music? what kind? yes! bon enjoys all sorts of music, but mostly songs you can sing along to. bar songs, shanties, ballads, he enjoys them all. he like songs that have an emotion to them if that makes sense. 25. do they make friends easily? NO. bon is both unfriendly and untrusting. however. if you are nice to him but once........... he Will die for you. and he will die for any child. loves childs. 26. surprise birthday party! how do they react? POORLY. either confused why people thought it would be a fun idea or angry that he was caught off guard. now... if you do it right..... have the surprise just be like.. a cake waiting at home or something.. a quiet night.. he will appreciate it. he Will die for you. 27. what is their favorite flower, if they have one? daffodil.. rebirth.. eternal life.. unrequited love.. perfect 28. how does your character feel about wearing jewelry? he's not a huge fan tbh. makes him feel like someone's shiny show piece. but he does like an earring or two or three 29. if they wear jewelry, what's their favorite piece? he doesn't wear jewelry regularly :( but he likes earrings! he likes little hoops that go on the top of his big ears 30. fashion forward or fashion disaster? more fashion forward than a disaster. he doesn't dress himself like.. super well.. cause his clothing tends to not last super long, but he knows how to look good 31. what kind of underwear does your character wear? NONE he's flying free 32. do they wear makeup? what kind? again, not any regularly, but will rock a good eyeliner if offered 33. do they paint their nails? no lmao good luck painting his lava nails, he'll melt ur brush, oh god and im sure the smell of burning nail polish is just awful 34. are they quick to get haircuts or do they often let it grow out? he cuts his hair pretty frequently (not well) he cuts like.. parts at a time. like 'hm this section looks a lil long' CHOP~ 35. do they know how to whistle? like a got damn bird 36. or how to braid hair? yes! he is good at this. 37. are they scared if anything in nature - bugs, snakes, lightning, being on the water, etc.? not really? he's had a lot of experience living outdoors so things that may have scared him at one point have been dealt with and most things it's like 'well i cant die so it really doesnt matter', cold and rain it's like 'well ill get real hecked up for a while but.. whatever' 38. have they ever thought they were about to die? YES! quite a few times, though not anymore lmao. one of the first times he ran away from home and nearly starved to death, the... incident, and when he was turned into a basbeo, just to name a few 39. how do they react to getting sick? pretending like he's not. pushing himself too hard until he cannot pretend anymore. nowadays tho.. he just turn into lava man and boom. all better. 40. are they afraid of blood? nah, he's seen plenty of it by this point to just not even register it. not even mostly his own! see this isn't a sad answer. 41. how do they earn money? HE DON'T! what use does a dog have for money u feel me 42. are they satisfied with their occupation or long to do something else? bon was basically a travelling bard at one point and oh boy he longs to go back to those days. his current occupation of 'guy who steals, kidnaps, murders and destroys on command' just isn't fulfilling for him. 43. how creative are they? i'd say pretty creative. he's not really doing anything with it right now, but he's a pretty imaginative guy. 44. do they know how to draw? how skilled are they? i think so! i figure that would be part of his lessons when he was younger. so he's probably.. too good at it. opposite of hana, where he's be good at portraiture and like.. pretty scenes. this also makes me think of little bon running around and putting lil devil horns on his mom's portraits 45. what do they carry around with them during the day (ie in their pockets, a bag, a purse...) doesn't really have.. a lot of things.. in the same vein tho, that jacket he wears, he's had for a while, and it's been through a lot now (i.e. the missing bottom) but. it's something he repairs and takes care of. it's special to him. for reasons. 46. do they have a sweet tooth? not especially, he doesn't like Sugar Sweet stuff, but he does like.. apples n stuff. he'll eat a peach croissant and enjoy it. everything in balance. 47. haute cuisine or cheap eats? cheap eats: more food for less 48. do they know how to swim? yes but he doesn't do it anymore cause he'll get too cold and seize up and lava man will just become a rock. he can use like.. hot tubs and very warm baths. he CAN enjoy those. 49. do they have any scars? how did they get them? well! bon had scars previous to his charred limbs (you'll see them soon) from being burned. because of.. reasons. i never know how depressing to get when talking about bon :( anyways, his charred limbs didn't happen immediately after becoming a basbeo. it basically happens when there's like.. a struggle for control between bon, his elemental, and who or whatever (maighstir, priomh, tera, his cuffs, etc.) is trying to control bon's transformation abilities. like either trying to use more power than he's being allowed, or to resist using it at all. they feel weird and crusty and leathery and warm! so the last one is kind of nice. it is unpleasant to hold his hand. 50. what kind of handwriting do they have? neat, messy, cursive, BOY CAN'T WRITE ANYMORE! he used to have really neat cursive handwriting like.. calligraphy style.
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Lovers By Chance, Goth By Choice | Snape x OC
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{parody fic, based on my immortal :p another thing I found deep in my google drive. thought it deserved to see the light of day. one of my best friends requested this while intoxicated and I just had to write it. don’t take it too seriously lol} 
Warnings: Smexy Themes uwu
Time/Era: Lightning era :)
Word Count: 1.1k shes long ^.^ like snapes dick
Summary: After Arvil Willow Way Urie gets put into detention by Professor Snape, things happen and no one sees it happen </3
Request: Please write a fic where snape kisses me in front Of everyone and doesn’t care who sees. I have like three names and i am GOTH. 
A/N: Rawr i <3 prof snape SM! Thx for the request </3 enjoy babey!!!!! WEEEEEEEE
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Hi. My name is Avril Willow Way Urie and I am goth, incase you couldn’t tell. I LOVE panic! at the disco, Brendon Urie is basically my husband. I’ not related to him no matter how similar our names are but I really wish we were because hes the sexiest man I have ever seen in my life. Anyway, I have short black hair that is cut uneven because it is CURLY and it doesn’t matter. The uneven cut represents my chaotic emotions. You wouldn’t understand them. I am gothic, and NOT a prep. If you call me a prep I will get very angry and flip you off everytime I see you. I love fishnets, like I am wearing today. Today I am wearing a ripped mayday parade shirt with a skirt that has planets all over them. I wear planets because i like space and i am SMART!!!!!!!!1 I have my big platform boots with ripped red fishnets under them. My eyeliner is smudged all over my eyes from crying. I am EMOTIONAL that is why i am emo. My nails are long and sharp just like draco likes. Did I mention I’m dating draco malfoy? Aka the HOTTEST PERSON ALIVE besides brendon urie. (A/N: If you don’t like panic! You are a PREPZ and I dont lik u)
“Miss. Way-Urie I will not have someone talk to me like this. Detention tonight at 8!” Professor Snape screams at the top of his lungs. 
“Omg wtf??? I’m just talking to my super sexy boyfriend Draco! What are you? Jealous?” I smirk, tucking a jagged piece of hair behind my pierced ears. I have 8 piercings in each ear and my tongue also has a stud in it. 
“HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME LIKE THIS!” Prof snape started crying making his black liquid eyeliner drip down his depressed face. Maybe he was emo like me. Prof are NOT emo tho so idk. My face grew sad and I started crying. This made draco angry. 
Draco was wearing a bleach tie died (A/N: get it? Died because im goffick) MCR shirt and acid washed jeans that were half black and half neon pink. Boyz can wear pink, you kno. It’s ok he’s just very in-touch with his emotions. His hair was pulled into big spikes on top of his head n they were died blue. He wore his red contax which made him luok even more goth.
“DONT SPEAK To MY SUPER SMEXY GIRLFRIEND LIKE THAT YOU TOE!!!!!” DRACO sobs, standing up and pushing me behind him. My big platform leather boots jingled and i almost tripped. 
“DRACO YOU PUSHED ME!” I gasped and started crying harder. Big black striped of makeup stroleld down my face like a galaxy. Im like space remember lol
“I”M SORRY BABY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!” Draco sprinted out of the room but left his chain on the desk. I grabbed it with my long nails and dashed after him. I fount him gasping for air against the piller. 
Herminny Granger came up and shoved me to the ground. She giggled and ran away. Fucking prepz. I put my middle finger up at her. 
~Time skipz to tonight lol~
“I have to go, draco” I gasped, looking depressed. 
“What? Are you inliove with professor snap or something?” draco weaped while singing “im not okay” my mcr. 
“So what if i am?” i said sneakily, closing my closet. I wore a big poofy dress with ripped black material and corset stuff on the front and back. My lips adorned blood read lipstick and my eyes were dead on the inside. I hummed dear maria count me in as i got dressed. Draco turned around so he wouldnt see me change because that is PORN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I pushed draco over so he hit the floor and walked into prof snap’s office. 
“SNAPEY!” I yelled. He was in the corner looking sad and depressed, watching rain fall from the heavens. 
“Oh. hello there.” he ejaculated as his long nose pointed in my direction and i felt tears wheel in my eyes. He stood and pulled off his cloak to reveal a fall out boy t shirt and ripped skinny jeans with doc martens and chains and zippers everywhere. 
I GASPED “YOURE GOFFICK???????” I was stunned and he strutted over, shaking his thick, juicy, greasy ass. 
“Yes, and emo and goth and punk and and alt and and indie and underground and a soundcloud rapper and in love with you.” He towards over my small frame and looked into my dark black and silver with small golden flecks orbs. I gasped and almost fainted. 
“What about draco?” my voice shaked as he started singing death of a bachelor by my favorite band, the hot panic1
“Forget about that dog poop bag. You are all i need please marry me and become Avril Willow Way Urie Snape.” His mouth covered mine and i moaned into his lips. His tongue fought mine for dominance and his long ring covered hand found my ass. I gasped as he squeezed me and looked at his neck. 
“Is that a stick and poke of a safety pin snapey?” I twirl his long, emo black, greesy hair inbetween my fingers. 
“It symbolizes my hate for the patriarchy and my love for you” 
JUST THEN DRACO WALKED IN AND PUNCHED SNAPE
“SHES MINE GRANDPA!” he yelled, throwing me over his shoulder! I moaned at the feeling and sobbed to be let down. He set me down and looked into my dead orbs with his blood red orbs. He was sobbing
“Snapes your gpa?” i groaned
“No” draco said back
“Oh” i winked
“But youre still mine” draco twerked 
“No thanks. I love snap now”
Draco screamed and ran into the wall while hermiomy recorded and ronuld farted in response. Everyone in the hall started laughing. 
“NO STOP I LOVE HIM!” I wheezed, throwing myself onto the floor in a big heap
Then I stood up and decided i had to go. The end
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crimsonhcadache · 3 years
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      - ̗̀ NOW INTRODUCING:  IVES ❝ IVY ❞ SERRANO !
( DANNA PAOLA, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER, SCORPIO, 24 ) I just spotted IVES “IVY” SERRANO at the beach today. Don’t you know them? They live down by the TOWERS and usually hang out with the RICH KIDS & MUSICIANS cliques. From what I’ve heard, they can be DECEITFUL, but they’re also ADAPTIVE. I always think of them when i hear LAST LAUGH - FLETCHER and tend to associate them with STRAWBERRY CHAMPAGNE, A FRESH SET OF STILETTO NAILS, AND RED LINGERIE. ( tay, she/her, 22, est )
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full name: natalie rose serrano ives serrano nicknames: ivy, poison ivy faceclaim: danna paola voiceclaim: lana del rey birthday: november 1st, 1996  zodiac: scorpio sun, aries moon, gemini rising sexuality: bisexual occupation: influencer, instagram model, musician, scammer / thief positive traits: effervescent, bold, creative, charismatic, coquettish, intuitive, ambitious, alluring, adventurous, perceptive  negative traits: cantankerous, deceitful, envious, manipulative, dramatic, stubborn, narcissistic, materialistic, reckless, quick-tempered character inspos: maddy perez euphoria, jackie burkhart that 70’s show, blair waldorf gossip girl, margo hanson the magicians, every lana del rey song ever, lucrecia montesinos and cayetana pando elite, rosa diaz brooklyn nine nine, the entire rose family schitts creek, jen harding dead to me
- ̗̀♡ — › background !
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the main thing u need to know about ivy is that she is lying ! always !! her real name isn’t even actually ivy smh
she was born NATALIE ROSE SERRANO, to two working class parents in new york city. she knew from a young age that she was just supposed to be rich and famous, and that something had gotten mixed up somewhere and she was put in the wrong life.
in high school she got a scholarship to a fancy private catholic school, and that’s where she started to hone her craft of manipulating rich people. she would befriend all of the richest bitches at school and take advantage of everything that came along with it: vacations to far away places, stays in the family’s cabins and lake houses, even designer clothes that her friends no longer wanted and would gift to her, thinking it was their idea all along
as she grew up and got better at getting what she wanted out of people, her entitled attitude only got worse, driving a wedge between her and her parents, who kept waiting for her to develop a work ethic and kept being disappointed. a few months after she graduated high school, on her 18th birthday, her parents kicked her out of the house and cut her off, hoping that it would force her to grow up and take on any responsibility
but that plan backfired for them, her parents underestimating how truly stubborn natalie was. the day after her 18th, she wandered into a local strip club and got a job, figuring it’d be the easiest and quickest way to get some cash, and she took to it naturally and actually really enjoyed stripping
she started to embody an entirely new persona that she had created for herself, dancing under the name POISON IVY and telling everyone she was a trust fund baby that had been cut off from her rich parents, needing to dance to supplement her income, and her lies just continued to spiral out of control until she almost started to believe it herself. she had never told anyone at the club her real name, not even the other strippers, just going by “ivy” for a while.
she had learned to weaponize the power she had over people by being pretty and charming, using her looks for absolute evil and doing whatever it took to get money—from straight up pickpocketing, to making men buy her expensive gifts, to blackmailing, to sugar babying, to getting patrons wasted and manipulating them into tipping her absurd amounts… she did it all, very quickly earning enough to live the life she had always dreamed of, that she felt she deserved for whatever twisted reason.
she started posting on instagram with the name poison ivy generally just flaunting her carefree, extravagant life, often exaggerating or down right lying just to really dazzle her quickly growing audience
as she started to go down the influencer route, she realized she needed to do something to hide the skeletons in her closet ( the fact that she didn’t actually come from money and was making far more than was normal for even the best of dancers, a couple of small possession / shoplifting charges, and just generally anything that could lead people to her real identity ) so she started to tell people her name was ives, fully taking on the new identity. she even went so far as to make some of the people that had been closest to her sign NDAs about her real identity, making sure that no one could sell info about her should her plan of being famous work out
she also moved out to california to run away from everyone in the city that was starting to catch on to what she was doing, basically doing all the same shit but now in a New Place.. this was about 3-4 years ago, so she’s been in sunhollow for a while now doing the whole influencer thing !!
and it did work out !! at first she was definitely buying followers/likes to boost her likelihood of brand sponsorships, but eventually she faked it until she made it and actually attained influencer status. she then used her newfound internet fame ( and some classic blackmailing ) to get herself a record deal 
she also started sleeping around with pretty much any famous person she could, having very public relationships and breakups and scandals to keep her name in the press, which ultimately lead to more exposure/people following her, if only to see what she did next, which lead to even more sponsorships
eventually she stopped dancing and just focused on her influencing and more recently ( like... less than 6 months ago recently ) her music career. but she never stopped sugar babying and scamming rich stupid men, still very much using that as a means to keep up her lifestyle. she’s also done a few modeling things, but it’s mostly just like catalog work or being the face of a trendy campaign bc she’s way too short for the runway
she also recently made an only fans account bc she was bored one night and was mostly planning on posting once as a joke but then she made a bunch of money / got a bunch of subscribers and was like oh word ? i can do that ! so she will post on there from time to time but she’s not like… super serious about it ya know ? also her music label is big mad at her for it bc they’re like bUt yOuR rEpUtAtIoN and she’s like yeah.. but my bank account ? also it’s no secret she used to be a stripper so she rly just.. doesn’t give a fuck ! 
so basically she’s jus here making money being pretty and pulling a long ass scam on… everyone
- ̗̀♡ — › personality / headcannons !
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she’s a real two faced bitch… she has perfected the art of becoming whoever she thinks other people want her to be, quickly adapting her personality to get whatever she wants
she’s usually pretty friendly actually, really charming and outgoing and just trying to have a good time
she has a pretty short temper tho and holds grudges like you wouldn’t believe, so once you’re on her bad side… good luck lol she is so ruthless
she’s like… deeply, deeply selfish and will always put herself first, but she’s so manipulative that she can make people do things that they think are their idea, but it’s really just something she planted in their head so it’s not always obvious
also very spoiled and will throw a mf fit if she doesn’t get her way or u say no to her
always going out !! always doing the most !! she’s the type to show up randomly at ur door at 8pm on a tuesday with a bottle of tequila and make u party with her whether u like it or not
she’s a lot smarter than she lets on sometimes, like she knows people expect her to be stupid and ditzy and shallow and she’ll let them underestimate her when it’s beneficial
always looks perfectly put together— her nails are always meticulously manicured, usually w stiletto shaped acrylics, and you’ll literally never see her outside her house without makeup and a perfectly composed outfit. it’s also a rare occasion that she’s not wearing at least six inch heels, trying to make up for bein so mf short ( she’s 5’3 )
she talks A Lot but is really good at saying a lot of words without actually saying anything, like you can be best friends with her for months and then just be like “i don’t actually know a single thing about her”
always up to no good and sticking her nose where it doesn’t belong !! she’s always got some sort of scheme going or getting in to some kind of drama
v much a hoe and v much proud of it, will sleep w just about anyone especially if she can get something out of it
also a serial dater !! she’s always hoping in and out of relationships and being rumored to be with a dozen people at once
most definitely calls paparazzi on herself, especially when she’s around other famous ppl but will never admit it
compulsive liar, she will literally lie about the dumbest things like she doesn’t even need a reason to lie she jus.. does
she has a luxury two bedroom apartment that she lives alone in ( one room is kinda a guest room but also mostly just a giant closet ) in the towers and the gag is she doesn’t even know how much her rent is bc one of her random sugar daddies pays her rent.. her power tbh 
- ̗̀♡ — › wanted connections !
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hookups / flings / one night stands / fwbs all that shit !!
exes on bad terms … gimme drama pls
enemies / ppl she’s stolen from maybe… she would definitely deny it and say they’re jus jealous of her or smth stupid but that could make the feud worse
party pals !! like i said she goes out a lot and always somehow manages to make new friends and drag them into her shenanigans
on again / off again exes… i want the Angst so bad..
shallow friendships / influencer friends like they play it up a lot for insta bc they both have a pretty big following but they dont really... like each other that much ?? like they definitely seem to be a lot closer than they really are
pr relationships this could be past or present !! in the same vein as the last one except they pretend to date ( or maybe just act like they’re gonna date but never actually do ?? like to fuel rumors ) 
unlikely friends !! like ppl who are nice and sweet and Pure, she could use a lil good energy in her life
situationship / flirtationship like they’re super flirty and maybe hook up a couple times but everyone assumes they’re dating or like gonna date but they’re jus vibing. bonus points if one or both of them actually has feelings but can’t tell if they’re just friends / casually hooking up or if it could turn into something more.. im a slut for some mutual pining !!
neighbors … mb they hate her for always being loud n throwing mini parties OR maybe they join in
mean girl rivalries !!
someone she’s taking advantage of / stealing from without them knowing .. oof
partner in crime !!!
one sided crushes or like someone she’s stringing along smh
sugar daddies mb 😇
someone to put her in her mf place JDKDKD like they call her out on her bs and are like “i see what ur doing bitch stay away from my friends” type thing
idk anything really !! gimme all the messy plots ok :~)
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Hi would it be alright to get a horror/slasher matchup please?. Pronouns are she/her and im bi. I'm 5,2' and I am quite thin but I workout quite a bit so I'm fairly strong, gotten be ready for an attack lol. I dont wear makeup or do my nails I just try to blend in with people I'm kindof scared of standing out. I'll braid my hair sometimes tho.
My personality type is ISTJ. My hobbies include gymnastics, figure skating and roller skating. I used to compete at gymnastics competitions and have won medals. I dont compete now but I maintain my skills and try to improve still. I think I like roller skating the most atm because you can go anywhere like it's not as restricted as an ice rink o just just put on my earphones and skate along a country road it's very chill.
I dont trust easily and am cautious of literally everyone but if I do trust you I'm loyal and fun to be around. I hate most people and prefer to be alone. I like indie music and classical music and I like to just kindof dance around even if I'm not very good at it (only in private lol).I also like nature and wildlife it's very calming. My love language is quality time and touch but I wouldnt be caught dead asking for it lol.
hope that's okay :)
That’s totally okay^^
I match you with:
Thomas Hewitt!
Other possibilities: Ash Williams, Michael Myers(JC) , Brahms Heelshire
Don’t hesitate to tell me if I missed some things or made some mistakes!
5’2”? You’re so small!✨
It’s not like it’s a bad thing, don’t worry. It’s just that he will be a little bit scared to hurt you... since he’s kind of big compared to you
Thin but you workout? That’s a nice thing for you, because you can defend yourself if he isn’t there
But he’ll mostly always be there, don’t worry! He’ll feel so bad if he leave you alone and you need to defend yourself D:
He’s really scared for you and would do anything to protect you, even if you know how to fight<3
If you don’t mind and aren’t scared, maybe he’ll ask you to help him cut the meat in the basement... maybe
That’s nice that you don’t wear makeup/do your nails because they would be ruined af:,)
When he was a kid, he didn’t like to stand out too because of his face yk... but he’ll always show you that you’re beautiful and don’t need to be scared of standing out❤️
Please show him how to braid your hair! He’s so cute trying to really carefully braid it, his scarred hands being a little too big for that<3
You’ve probably got one of the best personality type he could hope for 😌
You do gymnastic? That’s sweet! He won’t ever try it since he doesn’t understands the point in it, but he’d love to just watch you do all kind of flexible moves, especially since you’ve won medals! He’ll encourage you
Skating and roller skating?? What’s that??
He’ll surely be confused at first, not having any idea of what it is.
After he tries and fall on his ass a couple of time, he’ll definitely scratch this from his activity list and be always by your side, not wanting you to fall and injure yourself...
He’ll go with you if you want him to, just not go too fast 😅
With him and the family, you should be cautious anyway. But it’s really nice that you can trust, since he wants you to be comfortable with him <3
Loyal and fun??? Anything he could ask 🥺
Hope you like being around him tho, since he seriously doesn’t really wants to leave you alone
He’s not picky with music ^^
Even if you’re not good at dancing, he’s going to love it if he catches you 💕💕
You’re beautiful ❤️
He doesn’t mind nature and wild life, he finds it really calming too:)
He’ll spend any quality time and touches you want, you don’t need to ask him, just show him a little because he’s never going to ask too😅💕
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apimpnamedlo · 3 years
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hi! i just want to say i love your content and keep going youre doing great. i was wondering if i could get a match if your still doing them... im a pretty calm layed back bisexual woman
until it comes to close friends and some family. i can be quite intimate and loud with them and silly, literally i laugh at everything. i have lots of mood changes and easily go from calm to loud all the time. in public im very quite or with people i dont know well. i tend to keep things to myself depending on who im with, i dont tell things to just anyone.
i often fall asleep during alot of events due to lack of sleep and usually fall asleep during class. i love to listen to music, dance, eat and play video games. even tho im ass at dancing and games theyre still fun! i usually sing and dance when im alone... because its embarassing.
my appearance is a pretty slim built female but larger on the chest and thighs. im 5”4/5 with long dark brown hair and brown eyes. i wear glasses and am usually bare faced now butt i used to wear makeup allll the time. i lovee eyeliner and eyelashes
postives — very caring, puts others before myself, intelligent, protective, calm and polite
nevatives — sensitive, stubborn, awkward and insecure... im socially awkward and dont know how to talk to most people in real life
I match you with...
SASHA BLOUSE
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She’s definitely a handful, but you would most definitely have a ton of fun with her. Sasha is almost like a puppy at first, bouncing off the walls in new relationships before she takes the time to settle down. Her love is something that really gets you going and this girl definitely always looks out for those she loves, especially when it comes to her girlfriend.
• Definitely a hungry girl, and constantly is bringing different treats and the sorts to you to try with her. It’s okay to refuse them, but she’s probably not going to even hide the fact she’s happy you did lol. She’s double back and eat the other one and then ask if you want to go out again.
•She’s awfully light on her feet, and if you’re scared to dance? She’ll let you stand on her own feet and guide you through the steps. Even if it’s just rocking with you there.
•Sasha’s nose is a beast, so even if you use the slightest different thing in your routine, she’s going to notice. It also means she can smell what you’ve got her already and surprises don’t really get past her.
• The most loving person EVER. Sasha is going to make sure you know she loves you with plenty acts of service with tons of physical touch at your demand.
• Makeup? She’s probably a little skeptical but she’s down to sit down and let you beat her face. Then? Cute photo shoot with her cute girlfriend 💕
• She’s definitely not the one to play with. That includes you. This woman is inTIMIDATING when she wants to be, and she wouldn’t even think of letting someone mess with you. If you even look like you’re going to cry, she’s going to go on a hunt.
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m88n · 3 years
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Hiiii ti! Omg no it’s all good, I tend to reply pretty promptly otherwise I will actually completely forget to and will only remember in three month’s time haha. It’s all good, as long as you enjoy talking to me and I’m not disturbing with so many messages 😂. I’d love talking but am v conscious everyone has diff boundaries and I don’t think your priority should ever be a stranger on the internet lol. Oh that’s so good!!! i’m quite spiritual too. I think you get more zen as you get older 1/??
too because you just give no shits about what people think. Omg more power to you!!! i feel like I transform when I wear it, like a magical girl 😂 but I’m just too lazy to do it lol. That’s a good way to be 😌. What’s ur fave makeup brand or product?Ooooh if u want I will send them to u via insta then!!!! I am always cooking and baking for my friends and fam 😌. i think one of my favourite cakes is an opera cake, which has layers of coffee buttercream and chocolate ganache 🤩2/??
or a white choc muddy boi!!!! Except I need them to be dairy free because milk hates me 😭. do u have a fave sweet or cake? I’m march 14! White day 🥰. Hehe yes pls don’t visit me until it’s safe 😂 in the interim we can plan a brunch crawl LOL. seclusion ftw. I was psyched when I went into remote working LOL an introvert’s dream!!! Luv u hope ur well get on the beers 🥰💖🥰💖 3/3 lol soz i think the formatting got eaten when i submitted these dkjaskdsa
🌚🌚🌚🌚🌚
Hello ... its me again steph 🥺💖🌚 hahahaa i feel you on that, but i really am someone notorious for replying late 😂😂💀💀😔😔 rip i mean as long as ppl get i dont mean any harm 🥲🥲 feel like my way of doing things is just very .... ??? Sometimes LMAO at times i feel like that part of me *might* b a lil similar to jaemin (??) like ppl cud sometimes b like tf is she thinkin HAHHAHA but i mean is me guys wat can i do abt it ..... yes v happy to hear that ur conscious about diff boundaries (giving + receiving) steph cos i feel like thats super ipt when ur relating to others.....🥺🥺👍🏻 but please plz don’t think ur a stranger to me steph😢😢😢 makes me feel the saddo !!!!
Thats so true hahaa omg it took me awhile to get here tho girl and im happy i did (and happy u did too🥺🥺💐) cos i feel like not everyone has the privilege of coming home to urself methinks. Same omg i literally do it to boost my fickle self esteem during the rona & bc im not exposing myself to any action these days 😂😂😂🌚🌚💀 n its fun !!! Exactly like a magical girl, like what kinda look shud i do this time !! Hahaha. Hmmm im a lipstick hoarder LOOL n i always love it when i mix colors n stuff... i dont usually buy korean makeup but i love their lip products omg !! My recent fav lip product is apieu true matte liquid(?) in some almond omg... its so good girl like i cud smudge it or wear it straight up🥲🥲🥲 love makeup LOL. Do u have any fav makeup products steph or a fav brand ???🥺
YES PLZ ok its about time i come home 2 our ig dms 😭😭😭😭🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 send them plz (if u don’t mind) !!!! 🍪🧁 Like how cat spams her cat pics whether or not were there to respond HAHAHAHA :”D ohhhhh damn opera cake is a solid cake yum !!! 🥲🥲 ohhhh u a white choc girl ?? (Fitting cos ur birthday on white day ???) I personally dont really like white choc😂 or what typa choc u like the most ??
Noo that must’ve been annoying since u love baking n desserts :/ but u gotta do wat u gotta do . Lately my stomach thing is doin its thing n man ... its so annoying but truly Health #1 . !!! ! Yes omg !! I LOVE strawberry shortcakes and fruit rolls like ones ud see at a japanese bakery 🥺🥺🥺🥺 or anything chocolatey mmmmm. Or mille crepes!!! Ohhhh damn. So many of my friends have birthdays in march ... u got anything planned for ur special day steph?? 😃👍🏻💘 LMAOOO but yea im actually planning to eventually visit u tho (if im still welcome then LOL), cos im also visiting my other friend who moved to syd 🥲🥲🥲👍🏻 two birds w one stone only rona getting in the way . OOOOO brunch crawl yes yes yes please !!! I went to syd a few yrs ago n i remember eating so many good food damn. 🥺🥺🥺✨✨✨
LOL omg dude fr tho 😂😂 my extrovert friends r like dying n im rly js chillen in my room HAHAH 💀💀💀💀 thank yu i hope ur well too luv 🥺💘💐 unfortunately getting on the beers will still hav 2 be postponed bc my stomach is being an ass these days lsjfkfjwojdj 💖💖💖✨✨✨
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S1E1: The Competition Begins
okie dokie first ever episode of dance moms rewatch starts now :0 i actually remember watching this the very first time it aired on lifetime because i was channel surfing and saw a commercial for it earlier that day. that was the summer between 8th and 9th grade. ah memories... i didnt know what to expect because i did dance when i was a kid but not on a competition team and it was mostly ballet so i was pretty unfamiliar with this whole world. 
anyway lets begin. this is probably gonna be a longer post than what i’ll end up writing for the other episodes in season 1 bc the first episode introduces so much info, just a heads up
Act 1: (aside: yes its insufferable to divide this into “acts” when its really just like “segments separated by commercial breaks” but thats how they’re called in actual tv scripts so im just going with that cuz i cant think of a better/easier way uwu)
god this is so fucking early 2010s lmao
i miss these days where they were just talented nobodies from pittsburgh on a low budget reality tv show that nobody even knew would be successful. and the bad hair and makeup but idk if that was also just a 2011 thing lol
THE REAL HOUSEWIVES GREEN SCREEN INTROS IM DYING
the chalkboard !!!! they werent doing the pyramid on the mirror yet 
(apparently abby never did anything similar to the pyramid thing but the producers made her and it became a whole Thing on the show and thats why the moms were like wtf is this bullshit the first week)
mackenzie looks like a toddler. chloe is so tiny. theyre the 2 who changed the most physically over the course of the show
i remember watching this for the first time being used to ballet lyrical and jazz but never having done or really seen acro/gymnastics in dance choreo and being SO flabbergasted. i was thinking “a chin stand is not dancing what the actual hell” and yknow what? i was right
melissa: “my boyfriend knows how much i spend on dance because he signs the checks...............hermehhemrherrmehermh” (the most awkward laugh omg)
maddie is wearing a fucking bumpit in her hair i cannot
melissa deadass just said out loud “im here for my daughter im not here to make friends” ok everybody mark that one off on your catty women’s reality tv show bingo card!
camera man accidentally getting in the shot filming right in front of the huge wall-mirror.... what is this, amateur hour? i’ll let it slide since its the first day of filming rehearsal but step it up, boys
aw i forgot about maddie getting sick and crying :/ poor kid
melissa saying “i cant stand a chid that’s sick” sounds so edited like the intonation made it seem to me like they just cut her off mid-sentence i love lifetime
oh this was still when they were wearing normal stuff to class/rehearsal like black leotards bc they werent getting sent a trillion crazy 2-piece dancewear outfits for free yet bc they werent famous, man those were the days
Act 2:
[obligatory b-roll footage of downtown pittsburgh] 
the maddie chloe paige trio !!!! this is making me feel so nostalgic
“knees together, paige. you’re bow-legged, you need to fix that”
“you’re tall, you’re skinny, you’re a beautiful girl, you can do better than this. FOCUS” shes like 10 abby what the hell
“people think im tough and i guess i am but i would rather be the one to make your kid cry in the privacy of my studio than at an open-call audition in front of hundreds of people”
okay unpopular opinion alert: i agree with a lot of what abby says about stuff like this but her delivery is flawed, to but it euphemistically, that being said i think the production team of the show and the fame inflating her ego changed all of this somewhere over the course of the second season and its really sad to see :/ i can expand on that thought later tho
aw paige crying bc abby correcting her (but not saying anything personal or out of line, just technique corrections (at based on what we were shown, we dont know everything she said oop)) shes a sensitive kid she never should have been put on this show :( 
paige looks exactly like her mom i didnt realize that before
nia and holly were done so dirty throughout the whole series in terms of the narrative the producers set up about nia being the weakest link :/ 
Act 3:
cathy’s entire involvement in the show from the very beginning was so painfully obviously scripted (or at least heavily staged) 
vivi was also done dirty by the show’s narrative and she was only 6 and they presented her as like the butt of the joke bc her mom’s “character” was crazy and also she wasnt good at dance. i wonder how she feels about the show now that shes a teenager hmm. she really seemed not to give a fuck about dance for better or for worse when she was a kid tho so maybe she doesnt care ?
in what universe would an owner of another competitive dance studio bring her own kid to another studio more than an hour’s drive away, AND be under the impression that she could compete with them in a week, especially when they showed the kids’ and moms’ shocked reaction at the start of the episode to having to learn a dance in a week and compete it? like really what is the point of cathy and vivi being a part of this show im so ????
Act 4: 
THE MINISTER DAWN OUTBURST HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT THIS
this fight is about 50% of what got them a full season 1 and then things took off from there tbh. the other 50% was the electricity dance but thats a point for next episode..... :)
“you’re a minister act like one” “YOU’RE RIGHT I AM A MINISTER! LET’S PLAY THE BIBLE GAME ABBY, WHEN JESUS SAW THINGS THAT WERE WRONG HE WENT AFTER THEM, AND YOU’RE NOT GOING TO DO THIS TO MY KID” ma’am i think the wrongs jesus addressed were of slightly more importance than a preteen being told she cant take a dance class if shes violating the studio’s dress code
this is so good bc it wasnt staged afaik and there are regular students all throughout the building just STARING at them like lmao what even is going on, so im pretty sure this is real???
regardless, yeah dont wear socks and a tshirt to an acrobatics class, thats common fucking sense
another cameraman-in-mirror sighting, but its hard to think about angles when filming spontaneous drama like this, so i wont count it against them
“you called me fat” (i remember that being in the episode but thats not on the episode available through lifetime on demand that im watching from my moms tv hmmmmmm) “i told you to close and tuck in your two-piece costume, theres a big difference. HOW CAN YOU REMEMBER THAT BUT YOU CAN’T REMEMBER TO TURN YOUR FEET OUT” uh scream
she really called the police on this woman i cannot handle this. can you imagine being a police officer responding to this call? 
“we have a parent thats out of control. pardon? no shes doesnt have weapons, just her mouth” iconic
im sorry im still not over the hair and makeup. the flat hair with the side bangs. the black pencil eyeliner applied all the way around the eye. why did any of us think this was a look :( why did we do this :(
Act 5:
they went all the way to phoenix to compete 3 numbers, only 2 of which are shown in the episode.
i think this is the only time they ever went to west coast dance explosion because its an actual competition and they wouldnt allow filming after this lol i think they did go to wcde one weekend in addition to a competition where they were filming but it wasnt shown or mentioned at all
abby not wanting brooke and paige to have a french manicure on stage if theyre the only ones in the group with the french tips is perfectly valid idk why it was framed as some crazy micromanaging shit
i also am really not a fan of the whole “high functioning alcoholic wine mom/crazy stage mom” schtick they were pushing for the first few episodes of this show
in retrospect i feel like so many of the quips in this episode were intentionally fucking crazy just to get the audience engaged enough to want to watch more episodes...
“see those girls down there, those girls with the legs? thats who you’re up against, so step it up”
abby warning them that its dangerous for their little party hats to slip when they’re doing aerials and pirouettes and stuff: “what if you were at radio city music hall and they had the ice rink out and you were doing a side aerial and fell 13 stories down and died, huh?” fantastic point abby thank you for saying that to 5 girls ages 8-12 less than 5 minutes before they went on stage. perfect time for a teaching moment like that :)
i forgot how bad the camera work was in the first few episodes for footage of their performances. like they really didnt think the show’s audience would actually want to watch the kids dance, the producers and editors thought we just wanted to see stage mothers yelling at each other lol
also the mic feed over the music of abby talking to herself giving them corrections while watching them dance on stage.... im so glad they quit doing that. i dont remember them doing it like that for any other episode, i hope im right
this choreo is very basic and its a cute dance i guess but its very cringe in some places and for the first episode this is such a forgettable group routine
their scandalized reaction to placing third and the sad piano music is so funny honestly
and maddies reaction in the interview which was almost definitely fed to her by the producers where shes like “i win all the time i dont really know what its like to LOSE i always win or get runner up” so many of maddies lines from season 1 interviews sound so fake and she was probably too naive to know they were getting her to say that stuff so they could paint her as a conceited brat (she was EIGHT)
the trio costume was so ugly im sorry (is it supposed to be like a 50s pinup bathing suit?) (and the headband thing looks so bad) and also the music is bad but they had no real authority over that bc of copyright stuff
chloe’s headpiece coming forward and the ensuing drama was another moment in the episode that really solidified public interest in the show imho.... 
“YOU’RE IN THE BAR HAVING A DRINK AND YOUR KID’S HEADPIECE IS FALLING OFF” “it did not FALL OFF it CAME FORWARD it was FINE!!!”
“mistakes happen, we’re human.” “YOU are. mistakes like that dont happen to me”
and then the “next time on dance moms” with the WILDLY INAPPROPRIATE electricity dance, of course. genuinely that was really smart of the producers in terms of structuring things to generate intrigue lol. and obviously it ended up working....
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rouge-the-bat · 4 years
Text
OOPS I HAD STARTED THIS THEN SAVED AS A DRAFT TO FINISH LATER BUT THEN FORGOT SO ITS. BEEN A BIT SINCE I WAS ACTUALLY TAGGED FOR THIS LMAO
ANYWAYS i was tagged by @skayforrest :'33
Rules: Please make your own text post when answering these to avoid long posts. Highlight/bold what applies to you!
for me to make it easier for me to read im going for:
bold: definitely me :3
italics: kinda me!
strikethrough: not me at All
(subscript parenthesis): my comments! (bc im very rambly lol)
also changing // between different phrases to ♡♡ to make it easier for me to distinguish between phrases too owo
♡  Appearance ♡
I am over 5’5 ♡♡ I wear glasses/contacts ♡♡ I have blonde hair ♡♡ I prefer loose clothing over tight clothing ♡♡ I have one or more piercings (my ears!) ♡♡ I have at least one tattoo (i want to get one of a drawing ive made soon tho!) ♡♡ I have blue eyes ♡♡ I have dyed or highlighted my hair (its p much back to normal now tho- and i want to dye it pink someday) ♡♡ I have gotten plastic surgery ♡♡ I have or had braces ♡♡ I sunburn easily ♡♡ I have freckles ♡♡ I paint my nails (not super often but i have fun doing it occasionally owo!) ♡♡ I typically wear makeup (i rarely do and usually its just lispstick, with maybe eyshadow and/or eyeliner) ♡♡ I don’t often smile (i can be really smiley sometimes but i dont interact with others much (esp irl) so i tend to not emote a whole lot) ♡♡ I am pleased with how I look (im cute round n chubby!!) ♡♡ I prefer nike to adidas (i literally dont care) ♡♡ I wear baseball caps backwards
♡ Hobbies & Interests ♡
I play a sport (i play... wii sports and real life bowling sometimes at most :'3) ♡♡ I can play an instrument (its been a really long time but i learned clarinet from school band) ♡♡ I am artistic ♡♡ I know more than one language (id like to learn some tho, like japanese, french, and/or korean maybe?) ♡♡ I have won a trophy in some sort of competition (never a Literal trophy :O) ♡♡ I can cook or bake without a recipe ♡♡ I know how to swim ♡♡ I enjoy writing (i like to but school has made me anxious anytime i try now ;w;) ♡♡ I can do origami ♡♡ I prefer movies to tv shows ♡♡ I can execute a perfect somersault ♡♡ I enjoy singing (exclusively for singing along, i dont really ever sing on my own lol) ♡♡ I could survive in the wild on my own ♡♡ I have read a new book series this year ♡♡ I enjoy spending time with my friends (who wouldnt!! esp with my friends, theyre amazing :'3) ♡♡ I travel during school or work breaks (id like to travel more..) ♡♡ I can do a handstand
♡ Relationships ♡
I am in a relationship (my girlfriend is so wonderful 🥰) ♡♡ I have been single for over a year (been dating my gf for almost 2 full years now!) ♡♡ I have a crush (fictional crushes count right? bc i have a million of those lol) ♡♡ I have a best friend I have known for ten years ♡♡ My parents are together ♡♡ I have hooked up with my best friend (thats meaning sexual right? bc im sex repulsed and so is my gf whos my best friend so, absolutely not lol) ♡♡ I am adopted ♡♡ My crush has confessed to me (im p much always the first to confess lol) ♡♡ I have had a long-distance relationship (hopefully someday tho it wont be long distance :'3) ♡♡ I am an only child (dear god no i have. 1 full brother, 3 half brothers, 1 half sister, and 2 or 3 step brothers gjkxjfk) ♡♡ I give advice to my friends (im not the best with advice but i try when i can!!) ♡♡ I have made an online friend (all of my current friends are online!) ♡♡ I met up with someone I have met online (GOD I WISH)
♡ Aesthetics ♡
I have heard the ocean in a conch shell ♡♡ I have watched the sunrise (many times, after being awake all night bc im p mych nocturnal lol) ♡♡ I enjoy rainy days (god i love rain so much) ♡♡ I have slept under the stars (iirc im p sure ive slept in a tent for going camping before ??? but my memory sucks so im not sure if that happened or i just always wanted to gjkdjg) ♡♡ I meditate outside (maybe i should try that sometime..) ♡♡ The sound of chirping calms me ♡♡ I enjoy the smell of the beach (ive been to a beach just a couple times.. i dont remember what it smelled like) ♡♡ I know what snow tastes like (i eat snow EVERY time it snows here, esp to make snow cream) ♡♡ I listen to music to fall asleep (on occasion! always instrumental stuff, sometimes meant for relaxing or sometimes just a comfort song from a game i love) ♡♡ I enjoy thunderstorms ♡♡ I enjoy cloud watching ♡♡ I have attended a bonfire ♡♡ I pay close attention to colors (ofc ! i love colors and graphic design is my passion- but like Actually, im not quoting the meme lol) ♡♡ I find mystery in the ocean ♡♡ I enjoy hiking on nature paths (would REALLY need to be in the mood for it) ♡♡ Autumn is my favourite season (close ! i love the chilly air and aesthetic of autumn as well, but winter is my ultimate comfort season <3)
♡ Miscellaneous ♡
I can fall asleep in moving vehicles ♡♡ I am the mom friend (mom friend mode can activate on Occasion, but usually im silly bastard friend) ♡♡ I am involved in extracurricular activities (im not in school) ♡♡ I enjoy mexican food ♡♡ I can drive a stick-shift (i still havent learned how to drive yet owo;;) ♡♡ I believe in true love (probably not in a typical sense?) ♡♡ I make up scenarios to fall asleep (oh no, i make up scenarios constantly in my head throughout the day, i get way too invested in them so they usually keep me up if i think about them when trying to sleep) ♡♡ I sing in the shower ♡♡ I wish I lived in a superhero movie (i def wanna live in some fictional worlds, but superhero movies arent things im usually into) ♡♡ I have a canopy above my bed ♡♡ I am multiracial (im not super familiar with my ancestry rn, so idk. would like to know sometime tho) ♡♡ I am a redhead ♡♡ I own at least 3 dogs/cats (rn i have 2 dogs and 3 cats!)
and uhhh ill tag @spiiderbiites @miphelda @kipokin @queerplyke @ameila if yall wanna do it :3? (if yalld like i can go thru n supply a version of this without all of my font edits and comments!) AH WHOOPS I GOT A URL MESSED UP BUT XENOLEAF U CAN DO TOO IF U WANT
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