#i really wish I’d left myself more time to work on this it didn’t come out like I wanted it to

[habken]

happy birthday bakugou 💥

#bnha #mha #my hero academia #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #kaminari denki #kirishima eijiro #mina ashido #sero hanta #jirou kyoka #deku #kacchan #bkdk #bakudeku #dkbk #habs art #i really wish I’d left myself more time to work on this it didn’t come out like I wanted it to

[bisexualiteaa]

could you write something where cooper is talking the reader through it, but like, super sweetly and lovesick?

Talk Me Through It, Baby

Cooper Howard x Fem Reader (SMUT!! And some domestic fluff)

CW: NSFW MDNI!! Established relationship, lingerie, flirting, cursing, reader being all enticing, 🤭 p in v, unprotected sex, p0rn w/o plot, domestic Cooper, irradiated cream pie, fingering, oral, (fem receiving) praise, Cooper talking you through sex and making love to you, slight OOC Cooper, slight deviation from TV series

AN: the creative juices are flowing people! I’m loving it, thank you all to have given me asks, it has been so much fun getting to write stuff for you guys! I think i may be done posting for today and have a busy rest of the week ahead of me but keep a look out within the coming weeks for those whose asks I have not done yet! I haven’t forgotten you lovelies, I promise ❤️ hope I did your ask justice, Anon! Enjoy some smut and domestic fluff! 🥰🤠

It’s days like these that made you remember just how nice it was to live a domestic life back in the day. No worries of murderers at your doorstep, no worries about food supply running too low, radiation sickness, it was just perfect. You could bake, you could cook whatever you could get your hands on, but the best part? Was when Cooper walked through that door after a long day to see the beautiful smile that would light up your face when you would greet him. You’d come up to him, greet him with a “welcome home, honey!” Followed by a sweet, soft kiss as his hands would fall to your hips once he’d make it through the door of your home in the settlement. You wished it could be like old times, but this was the closest to that that you’d gotten and you were proud of it. You had a nice home that almost was completely patched of all holes, working appliances thanks to the electricity you got going, clean water, food and some furniture to really spruce things up.

It was the activities that transpired after dinner however that left you both the most excited for when we would be home. You smiled cheekily as you returned from the bathroom, sitting against the doorway clad in a nightgown that you had made for yourself from collected fabrics. It was soft and silky, yet slightly see through, adorned by lace cups and lace around the bottom as it flowed out yet also hugged your frame. One where it left very little to the imagination of what lay underneath. “What do you think?” You asked excitedly yet with a sensual calm tone, making Cooper look up at you with a grin. He whistled as his eyes roamed your figure, loving the way it hugged your curves just right and let your pert nipples poke through the lace. “What do I think?” He asked, standing up and walking towards you, meeting you half way as you sauntered into the room. “I think you look like a dream come true, sweet pea” he said, his hands coming to rest on your hips as yours looped around his neck with a smile. “You like it? I made it myself” You asked, knowing by the tent in his briefs and the smirk on his lips that that answer was obvious. “Oh I love it” he said genuinely, trailing his hands along the smooth, silky fabric as he looked down at you with a soft smile before pulling you in for a kiss. You hummed contentedly into it, removing his hat from his head and placing it on your own with a chuckle into the kiss. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were propositionin’ me, little lady” he said, making you grin up at him with that half lidded look of mischief and love in your eyes that he just couldn’t get enough of. “Maybe I am” you answered as your eyes flitted between his and his lips, your hands coming to rest against his chest softly, just enough touch to tease, yet enough to make him chase after you for more. “Then let’s take it for a spin, hmm?” He asked, making you giggle softly before a light gasp left your lips as he leaned down, planting sweet kisses to your neck, making your eyes flutter shut in bliss. Your arms held him tighter, pressing your chest against his as his teeth found all your weak spots, being sure to exploit them to work you up even further and hear those beautiful sounds he loves so much. “Cooper…” you sighed, your head falling back at the feeling of his rough hands running along your body, grabbing at anything he could get his hands on. Between kneading the pleasantly soft flesh of your ass, to fondling your breasts, he just couldn’t get enough of you.

“Always look so pretty for me, sugar” he said, making you smile at his heartfelt compliment as he worked at the straps of your hand-tailored nightgown. “I always do my best for you” you replied, making him chuckle. “Don’t need to, you’re perfect as is” he responded, watching as it fell off of you with ease, the fabric pooling at your feet as he kissed you. He felt your hands smooth over his shirt as his tongue invaded your mouth, tasting the gin and sweet cherries you had with dinner, making him groan. You always tasted so damn sweet, so addictive. Sugar-Bombs be damned, you were 100% of his daily value of sugar and he wouldn’t want it any other way. When he noticed you had nothing on underneath, he couldn’t help but grin. “Look at you, you’re just so damn gorgeous, what’d a bastard like me ever do to get so lucky?” he complimented, making you smile giddily at his continued compliments. “By being you, Mr. Cooper Howard. Wouldn’t want you any other way” you replied, making him give something between a groan and a chuckle as your lips came to his neck. “The bed looks awful empty, what’dya say we change that?” You asked, grabbing his hand and leading him to the bed as he chuckled. “I like the way you think, sugar” he replied, watching as you sat down on the bed before him, looking to him expectantly. “C’mon don’t be shy now, tell me what you want” he said, but rather than speak your mind, your hands spoke for you, finding their way to the bottom of his shirt, lifting it up to where he’d take it off. He chuckled. “How ‘bout these? Want these off too, sweet pea?” He asked with a grin, knowing the answer before you even shook your head yes to confirm it. “Go on, take ‘em off for me. I know you like it more when I let you do it” he said softly, bringing your dainty small hands to his belt buckle, watching and helping you undo it and the button to his pants before taking a hold of his zipper with your teeth, and bringing it down. He groaned watching you toy with him, his fingers gliding through your hair, scratching your scalp before moving down to your chin, tilting your face up to look at him. “Eyes up here, darlin’” he teased, a grin on his lips as your pretty little doe eyes squinted with your smile, completely love drunk. He watched as you placed your fingers to his hips, helping pull down his pants and briefs as you looked him in the eyes the entire time. “Good girl, so good at it you ain’t even gotta look” he said, making you bite your lip and giggle as excitement was nearly tearing you apart, but you were being good. Patience was key, he loved drawing things out with you to where you were left absolutely crazy for each other.

“Sit your pretty self back some, let me have my dessert” he said, making a pleasant tingle flow through you straight to your throbbing clit. You did as you were told, scooting back a little and resting back on your hands as you spread your legs for him. “There ya go, nice ‘n wide for me, perfect. Look at you, so pretty for me. ‘f I had film in that old camera I’d snap a picture just to keep around of this sight” he said, making you grin up at him, the look in your eyes full of need as he got down on his knees at the edge of the bed. His lips trailed searing hot kisses up along the insides of your thigh, getting closer and closer to where you needed him most before placing the most feathered light kiss to your clit. Your hips bucked up involuntarily out of need and anticipation, a moan leaving you before you whined as he lavished the other thigh with kisses. He gave an amused chuckle. “Patience sweetheart, you’re doin’ so good for me. I promise it’ll pay off” he said, trailing back up to your soaking cunt where he’d placed soft, searing kisses to your clit, making your eyes flutter shut once more and your head drop back with a moan. He groaned at your taste, at the way one of your hands rested on his bald head to tell him how good he made you feel. He looked up at you as he let his tongue lull out, running it up your slit to your clit, flicking the tip of it against your sensitive nub. You keened at the sensation, your chest rising and falling drastically with the harsh inhales and exhales of your pants and moans, a small smile turned the corners of your lips as your eyes were shut. “Cooper…” you moaned, and it was music to his ruined ears. “Taste so good sugar, I swear it’s like you’re made of it” he said, placing a playful bite to the inside of one of your gummy thighs, earning a louder, surprised yet pleased moan in response. “Fuck…” you panted, making him chuckle as one of his fingers prodded your entrance, sliding in all the way to the knuckle as his tongue flicked against your clit in a rhythm that had you bucking your hips to meet his mouth. “Feels s’ good, please..” you begged, feeling him curl his finger inside of you to rub against that sensitive bundle of nerves. He was going to be the death of you one of these days, you swore it, he was too damn good at this. He watched as you looked down at him, unable to tear your eyes away from the sight of him eating you like a man starved. He gave a wink at you as your gazes met, smirking into you as he felt you get closer and closer. “That’s the spot, ain’t it sugar? That’s it, doin’ so good for me, I know you’re close. Let go for me honey, I’ve gotchya” he said, keeping that delicious pace with his tongue and fingers rubbing that spot inside, it didn’t take long for you to do just as he asked. With a moan you came on his fingers and his tongue, a low, feral groan leaving his throat and rumbling his chest as you did. “Good girl” he praised, making you whimper as he withdrew his fingers. his mouth and chin shining with your slick and his spit. He used his fingers to wipe it off, looking you in the eyes as he sucked on his fingers to remove it, groaning at the taste as he licked his lips clean.

He climbed up on the bed over top of you, leaning down to kiss you which you graciously accepted, unbothered by the taste of you on his lips and tongue. “Ready sweetheart?” He asked, making you shake your head yes at him, enjoying how desperate you were for him. He leaned back to rub his tip through your slit, collecting your slick and mingling with the pre-cum that beaded out from it. “Don’t tease, Coop..” you begged, making him chuckle. “I know, I know, just makin’ sure I don’t hurt ya” he said, before easing his way into your tight cunt. Didn’t matter how many times you two had sex, the stretch always burned at first but subsided into nothing but absolute bliss. “Doin’ so good for me, doin’ okay sweetheart?” He asked once he was fully sheathed inside you, waiting for you to tell him when to move and making sure you weren’t in pain. You looked up at him, that smile that he swore was the brightest thing in the universe eased all his worries. “I’m good, Coop. You can move whenever you’re ready” you said, making him chuckle as he leaned down to kiss you again, starting a soft, slower pace. He didn’t want to fuck you tonight, didn’t want to have sex with you, no. He wanted to make love to you, show you how much he loves you, show you how much he worships the ground you walk on. He wanted to give you everything you ever wanted and more just to see that pretty little smile in return, it’s all he ever asked for. You both moaned into your shared kiss, his one hand holding yours by your head, fingers intertwined with each other as the other rested on your hip. Your free hand roamed along his scarred back, your head tipping back as his thrusts were deep and calculated. You shut your eyes as his lips roamed your neck, once again abusing the sensitive skin to hear your voice sing for him. “Feel so good honey, like you were made for me” he said, making you hum at the thought, you certainly liked to think so. “Maybe I- hah~ was” you said between moans, making him chuckle dryly. “Maybe you were” he said, his lips attaching to one of your breasts, his tongue laving over one of your nipples as his other hand toyed with the other between his thumb and finger. You moaned as your head fell back against the pillows, hair fanning around your head like a halo. You were ethereal, he swore it. His perfect little angel to keep him out of too much trouble, but just naughty enough to keep him on his toes.

“I love you so much, darlin’. Love everything you do for me” he said, making you smile warmly. “I love you too Cooper, and everything you do to- I mean *for* me” you said playfully, making him laugh at your witty joke, feeling the way your gummy walls hugged him tight, fluttering around his cock as he kept a good steady pace. “Felt you tighten around me, go ‘head, let go for me baby. I’m here” he said, bringing his thumb down to rub tight circles against your clit, leaving your back arching off the mattress and a wide O shaping your lips. “Fuck…Cooper, cum with me, please…inside” you said, making him groan into your neck as he buried his face there. “Anything for you sweet pea” he replied, moaning into your shoulder as you held onto him for dear life, knowing your orgasm would hit you hard. And that it did. You saw white stars flash in your vision, as your body arched up from the mattress once more, pressing yourself to him as your walls clamped down around him, milking him of everything he had to offer you as he painted your walls white. You panted as you rode out your highs, his lips coming to yours for a sweet, gentle kiss before resting his forehead against yours.

As you both lay there, basking in the after glow, he couldn’t help but get lost in your eyes. “What’s that look for, hmm?” You asked teasingly, making him chuckle. “Just that I found the love of my life” he said, so casually as if it were common knowledge, making you give him that beaming smile he loved so much. Your hand came up to cup his cheek, rubbing the irradiated skin with your thumb as you closed your eyes and pressed your forehead to his once more. “Good, because I’ve been lookin’ at mine for a few months now, wondering when you’d finally admit it” you said, making him laugh along with you as he pulled out, got you both cleaned up and hooked you up to some RadAway. “Maybe I’ll go down to the market and getchya that ring you were eyein’ last time we went” he said, making you look at him astonished. “Oh Cooper, you ain’t gotta do that! You know how many caps that’ll run you?” You asked, making him laugh. “Does it look like I care? Besides, if it’s that ridiculously expensive, no one ever said anythin’ about spendin’ the caps if the person sellin’ it ended up missin’ somehow” he said with a grin, making you grin as you kissed him, only he could make murder look so good.

#fallout x reader #fallout smut #fallout #cooper howard x you #cooper howard smut #cooper howard x reader #cooper howard #the ghoul x you #the ghoul smut #the ghoul #the ghoul x reader #asks

[zexapher]

A Fond Farewell

With Rooster Teeth beginning its draw down, an era has truly passed. The company has lasted more than two decades. 18 (soon 19) seasons, five mini-series, and cameos and references in Halo itself for Red vs Blue. 9 volumes alongside two movies, a chibi series, Ice Queendom, and its own games for RWBY. And so much more beyond that, RT Shorts, podcasts, Achievement Hunter, The Slow Mo Guys, and on and on. That’s a lot, especially for a little startup launching off a web series. I was listening to “This Isn’t Goodbye, It’s See You Later” by Richie Branson while I was making this little memorial post. It’s a song made for another Rooster Teeth show, Camp Camp, and I have to say it’s some very appropriate music for this moment.

The day the news dropped, I wrote up a little comment in response to Rooster Teeth beginning its closing down, and I thought I’d share some of it here. I grew up with Rooster Teeth, a bit of a cheesy line I know, but it’s true for a lot of us. I was just a little kid way back in the early 2000’s, a kid that liked Halo (a game I didn’t even own for a long time, but played at a friend’s house), and was just getting curious about what I could find about it on YouTube. And that brought me into the world of music videos and skits and montages made for that little game I liked.

From there, I discovered a small web series called Red vs. Blue. I’d sneak onto my folk’s computer to watch it since they didn’t appreciate the language, and in doing so I dipped my toes into the wide world of the internet for the first time. As I got older, I eventually hopped onto Reddit for its discussion threads of Rooster Teeth’s latest show, RWBY. I began my first in-depth fandom interactions, speculating about the show, enjoying the flood of fanart, even got into fanfics about RWBY (those fics have had their own amazing evolution alongside the show) and to this day it’s the fandom I’ve followed and bookmarked the most fics from. All the while I was making friends and bonding with people through the community this company and its shows have created.

Watching the shows and people grow over time was, looking back on it, just like watching myself grow. I was never really a social media/internet kind of guy, until it came to Rooster Teeth. The shows, shorts, podcasts, it all opened up a whole new world for me. It’s sad to see it coming to a close, and I hope it gets picked up in the future. But I’m happy, too, that it’s left so much behind, and had such an impact on me. It’s left me with so many good memories. Rooster Teeth, its shows, those that created and worked on it, and above all the community around it will always have a special place in my heart.

So, I bid a fond farewell to Rooster Teeth and its crew, and anyone who may drift away from the fandom in time. I wish you all the best.

#rwby #red vs blue #rooster teeth #rvb #jaune arc #weiss schnee #ruby rose #yang xiao long #blake belladonna #lie ren #nora valkyrie #memorial post #save rwby #crwby #greenlight volume 10 #rwby white knight #white knight #rwby whiteknight #jaune x weiss #jaune arc x weiss schnee #rwby bumblebee #yang x blake #pyrrha nikos #cinder fall #james ironwood #arthur watts #fandom #thank you

[cowboahs]

quotes that broke me starters

feel free to adjust pronouns / names as needed !

quotes taken from random sources or tiktok. i claim no ownership whatsoever.

❛   i’m supposed to be the one who protects you from monsters. i’m not supposed to be one.  ❜  

❛   if i could make a deal with god, and i’d get him to swap our places.  ❜  

❛  no one heard our screams for a long time.  ❜  

❛   i know so many last words. but i’ll never know hers.  ❜  

❛   there is a home for every departed thing.  ❜  

❛   it reminded me that i will never truly know you.  ❜  

❛   i also buried a part of myself alongside them.  ❜  

❛   after you died i could no longer hold a funeral. so my life became the funeral.  ❜  

❛   you don’t have to be awake to cry.  ❜  

❛   forgive me, for all the things i did. but mostly the things i didn’t do.  ❜  

❛   the human eye is the loneliest creation of all.  ❜  

❛   fairness is for happy people.  ❜  

❛   the things we lost will always be heavier than the things that stayed.  ❜  

❛   perhaps it is the greater grief, to remain on the earth when another is gone.  ❜  

❛   you stain the pages with yourself.  ❜  

❛   tears will not wash away the sorrow.  ❜  

❛   beautiful things grow a certain height and then they fall and fade off.  ❜  

❛    who in all these centuries has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?  ❜  

❛   i have scars on my hands from touching certain people  ❜  

❛ �� despite everything, i believe that people are really good at heart.  ❜  

❛   you tried to change, didn't you?  ❜

❛   you can’t make homes out of people. someone should have taught you that.  ❜  

❛   i hid my deepest feelings so well, i forgot where i placed them.  ❜  

❛   we have no scar to show for happiness. we learn so little from peace.  ❜  

❛   i didn't leave because i stopped loving you. i left because the longer i stayed, the less i loved myself.  ❜  

❛   at every moment in our life, we have one foot in a fairytale & the other in the abyss.  ❜  

❛   there are too many sad eyes on happy faces.  ❜  

❛   it's strange, i felt less lonely when i didn't know you.  ❜  

❛   things change, friends leave. life doesn't stop for anybody.  ❜  

❛   it takes a lifetime to die, and no time at all.  ❜  

❛   i am deathly afraid of almosts. of coming close to what i want and then falling just a little short.  ❜  

❛   i felt your absence.  ❜  

❛   what do we do now, now that we are happy?  ❜  

❛    you honestly thought anybody would love you? purely and truly love you?  ❜  

❛   don't stop looking. he deserves to know someone saw his end, that someone noticed him.  ❜  

❛    i can bear my pain so long as it has meaning.  ❜  

❛   i dont have a single friend - not one.  ❜  

❛   i've had more than enough pain in my life, what's a little more going to do?  ❜  

❛    it would have been you if i met you first.  ❜  

❛    i really thought he was going to be my forever.  ❜  

❛    maybe in the next life it would work.  ❜  

❛   in spite of everything, you're still you.  ❜  

❛   the dead have it easy.  ❜  

❛   there's an ocean of silence between us, and I'm drowning.    ❜  

❛   there have been countless times in my life when i thought i’d be better off dead.  ❜  

❛   what on earth... have i become?  ❜  

❛   don’t look at me! i don’t ... i don’t want you seeing me like this.  ❜  

❛   i wish i could’ve been like you.  ❜  

❛   your fate was sweeping you away, like a flood.  ❜  

❛   the future should know the mistakes we made.  ❜  

❛   of course you have. you feel guilt. you want redemption.  ❜  

❛   i'm here because you can't accept what you've done. it broke you.  ❜  

❛   even now, after all you've done, you can still go home.  lucky you . ❜  

❛   you're all that's left, and we can't live this lie forever.  ❜  

❛    prometheus gave us light, and warmth, and eternal damnation.  ❜  

❛   take a gamble that love exists, and do a loving act.  ❜  

❛    i know i ruined your life. i suffer for it every day.  ❜  

❛   don't let yourself get killed for... for pride. i’ve seen it kill too many folk.  ❜  

❛    you and me, we ain't decent... but those folk... they were.  ❜  

❛   we're more ghosts than people.  ❜  

❛   despite my best efforts to the contrary... it turns out i've won.  ❜  

❛   i gave you all i had ... i did.  ❜  

❛   this whole time, I've blamed myself for that decision.  ❜  

❛   do you think even the worst person can change...? That everybody can be a good person, if they just try? ❜  

❛   i don't want to break their hearts all over again. it's better if they never see me.  ❜  

❛   please leave me alone. i can't come back. i just ... can't, okay?  ❜  

❛   no matter the struggles or hardships you faced... you strived to do the right thing, you refused to hurt anyone. ❜  

❛    people like you don't ever want to be happy.  ❜  

❛   i don’t want to let go. i’m not ready to say goodbye yet.  ❜  

#rp meme #sentence starters #rp sentence starters #angst meme #angst rp meme #angst starters #angst sentence starters #honestly the undertale ones still hit hard even after only one play of the game when it came out #MISS ME with the resetting everything and taking peoples happy ending away from them

[alientee]

To Live Mauga x reader

I wrote this after reading a agnst Mauga fic it made me sad so I changed my past idea from slice of life to a fluffy moments with taking care of Mauga (gender neutral reader)

You didn’t ask Mauga a lot about his past, but you know it made him into the man he is today. As long as you’ve known him, he’s always had a carefree outlook on life. You’ve seen him angry, happy, horny, and even embarrassed.

But you had never seen him sad; nothing could wipe the usual smirk off his handsome face. To have a face of complete shock or dread was not something you were used to seeing. Mauga, the unshakable mountain of a man, was trembling, and you didn’t know what to do.

He came home distressed, covered in bandages. He took one look at you and instantly went to the bedroom, cooping himself up without saying a word. You made your way to the room to see the man you loved on the bed, slightly curled up, as if it would hide him from the world.

You went over to him and put your arms around him. He didn’t say anything; he didn’t even move. But somehow, you knew he didn’t want words; he just needed you. You continued to hold him, rocking him back and forth. And after an hour of that, he finally spoke.

“I almost died today." Your blood ran cold. Those are genuinely the last words you ever wanted to hear from him. You knew working for Talon would come with trouble, but being prepared for it was a whole different issue. You didn’t speak, deciding to wait and see if he’d continue.

“We had a mission to capture this dude. He owed Doom first a lot of cash. I should’ve known it would be bullshit when he sent the whole team. The guy we were chasing had us trapped like rats, trying to pick us off one by one. He had a lot of goons, too, until we finally caught up with him. The place was already torn down and still coming down on top of us. That asshole knew he couldn’t make it out, so he set himself off.”

You look at him, confused. “Set himself off?” Mauga nodded.

“He had bombs on his body, saying he wouldn’t give doom shit. He said he reached his goal, and he'd die knowing he did it with no regrets. I knew he was crazy, but I didn’t think he’d off himself before we could even capture him.”

Mauga leaned his head onto yours; he stayed quiet for a moment before placing his face on your shoulder.

“The whole building was coming down, and because I was the tank, I took the blunt hit off it. I was trapped behind the ceiling debris that fell. The whole building was falling apart; shit was on fire, and I was trapped. I thought I wasn’t gonna get out. When more of the ceiling fell on top of me, it broke open the floor. I fell through, but I had a chance. I had to crawl most of the way and use my guns to break whatever was blocking me off. I reached dead end after dead end, and I didn’t think I could get out. Shit was falling down on me, and I could barely breathe, and by the time I made it somewhere else, I thought it was another dead end until I dug through the debris and made it outside.”

You hugged him tighter, kissing his face all over. He had bruises all over his face. You kissed each of them softly, giving him an Eskimo kiss.

“I’m so glad you made it out, darling. I don’t know what I would have done if I’d lost you. My poor baby."

Mauga leaned into your touch, snuggling closer to your warmth. He kisses your cheek, finding his way back to your neck.

“Wanna know the most fucked up part when I got out. They were flying away, and the only reason they came back was because Sigma saw me and started waving, and Sombra came to look. They left me for dead, and I’m not even fucking surprised.”

You scowled “I’m not surprised either; I really wish you never joined Talon in the first place, but I know that as a mercenary, you have to do what you need to.”

He nodded while kissing your shoulder. He pulled you into his chest, and you rubbed your fingers over his bandaged arms.

“For the first time in a long time, I was afraid of dying. I promised myself after the heart surgery I’d live every day like it was my last; I just never thought that day would come as quickly as that. I was actually fucking scared of dying. I didn’t want to die that way, trapped and alone."

You held him tighter, and if you felt your shoulder getting wet, you didn’t say anything about it.

“I thought about you, how I couldn’t leave you, and how I had to get back to you. All I wanted to do was get back to the one person who gave a damn about me.”

“And you did. I’m so proud of you, my love.” You run your fingers through his hair and console him. "You're so strong. I know I worry about you a lot when you go on missions, but I never doubted that you would always come back to me."

You both hold each other while sharing sweet kisses and longing looks. Putting your foreheads against one another, Mauga squeezes your hips, bringing you closer.

“How about we take a bath together? I could look at your wounds, and after that, I’ll warm up dinner for you.”

Mauga nods, kissing your lips softly. “I’d love that, baby."

You got to the bathroom and ran the bath water. You can hear Mauga behind you getting undressed. You turn around and help him take off his wraps. He runs his hands through your hair, kissing your forehead as you slowly remove his bandages.

You couldn’t help but flinch at some of his wounds. You lift his hands, kissing each one of his knuckles. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

You both stepped in the tub, but this time you got behind him. You take the shampoo and conditioner and start with his hair. He growled when you scrubbed his scalp; he always loved it when you played in his hair.

He growled and leaned his head back. As you rinsed his hair out, he leaned into you, kissing your jaw and neck. You softly push him away. “Let me wash your back.” He turned back around, letting you wash him.

“Wanna wash all of me?” You roll your eyes at him while he snickers.

“I’m not washing your butt, you dork," he playfully splashes you, causing water to get in your face and all over the floor.

"Oops"

After you both finish up, you dry off his hair, then clean and rewrap his wounds. He holds your waist the whole time, not giving you much room to move. “Do they hurt really bad?”

He gives you a pout, nodding his head. "Yup, kiss em for me?” You laughed at his foolishness. “You know what? Yes, I will.”

You lean in, kissing every one of his bandaged wounds. Mauga runs his fingers through your hair. He brings your face up to his, bringing you into a slow, passionate kiss. Your tongues caress each other, and his hands cover your face while rubbing your temples.

You lean back and kiss his chest, where his two hearts would be. “Let me warm your food up, then we could watch a movie."

He nodded. You both headed downstairs, and while you got his food ready, Mauga didn’t let you go. You are used to him being affectionate, but not this clingy. You didn’t mind, though he almost lost his life. You almost lost him. No matter how long it took, you’d be by his side, spoiling him until he was comfortable.

“Common Mauga I promised you cuddles and a movie."

And that’s how you both ended the night, cuddled up in each other's arms, sharing kisses and light touches. Mauga hands never left you. He nuzzled himself into your chest, and you played in his hair. Laughing at his cute antics.

“Gimmie kiss,” you lean down, kissing his lips.

"Another.” You start laughing; the sight of the giant man pouting and giving you puppy dog eyes was so adorable.

When you kiss him again, Mauga bites your bottom lip, sucking on it. Once he lets you go, you can’t help but ask something that’s been on your mind.

“You’re not going back to them, are you?”

“Don’t know"

You sighed, not really liking the answer, but not questioning it.

“Just know you don’t need them to make a living."

He looks up at you, kissing your nose.

“I know; all I need is you."

And after that, you couldn’t help but give Mauga all the kisses he wanted.

#mauga #mauga x reader #overwatch #overwatch 2 #overwatch mauga #mauga overwatch #overwatch x reader #ow mauga #maugaloa malosi

[wayward-dreamer]

Just For Tonight

Square/s Filled: Doggystyle @spnaubingo | One night stand @anyfandomkinkbingo | Touching under the table @jacklesversebingo

Pairing: Jensen x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 4,510

Summary: On a night out after a hectic work conference, Jensen was only looking for a quick drink before he returned home the next day. He clearly wasn't looking for more than that, but he definitely welcomed it once he met Y/N.

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, smut: dirty talk, vaginal fingering, oral sex (fem receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it up people), rough sex, multiple orgasms, overstimulation.

A/N: It's been a while since I've written a Jensen fic, so here you go! Happy reading and hope you enjoy :) beta'd by my love @hintsofhoney

Jensen flicked open the top two buttons of his crisp white shirt as he walked into the pub, looking for a place to sit. Given that it was a busy night, he found a spot left at the bar, taking it immediately. His co-worker, Dan, had already ditched him back at the hotel, having found a blond woman he had been interested in talking to the entire conference. He sighed as he sat on the stool, his green eyes scanning over the people there, the hectic schedule of the last three days taking a toll on him. He was more than ready for a hard drink, or a few, before heading home the next day. The conference had been incredibly draining, and he was officially done being concerned with numbers and figures until he was back in the office on Monday.

Dan had wished him well in the hopes to find someone to spend the night with, but Jensen wasn’t thinking about that, even at all. It’s not that he never hooked up, he did. He just didn’t do it as often as his friend or other coworkers did. He had concentrated so hard on getting to a higher position at the company that he didn’t really find time to let loose once and a while. After the last three days with seminars dedicated to investment banking and financial services, however, he needed a break from the numbers swirling around in his head.

He looked around the room once more as he sipped his drink, and it wasn’t long before his eyes landed on a back corner table. It was a group of four women, laughing as they chatted about something, but he was only taken with one of them. From what he could see, she was wearing a black dress that came to just above her knees, the sleeves lace with the trim ending at her forearms. She giggled as she sipped a pink drink from a martini glass, causing him to smirk as he thought about his next move. He shifted around to get the bartender’s attention again, asking him to send a drink to the mystery woman’s table, the one she had ordered.

Jensen watched as the man behind the bar mixed it together before pouring it into a glass, sending it with one of the waiters towards the table. The women all looked up in surprise as the drink was placed on the table in front of her, the waiter gesturing to the bar before he left. Jensen’s eyes met hers from across the room, hers narrowing slightly as she looked between him and the glass in front of her. He watched in amusement as her friends whispered and nudged her, no doubt telling her to go over to him. He decided to make it an easier decision, getting up from the stool with his drink, pushing his way past people.

He smiled as he reached the table, standing right in front of her as their gazes remained locked on each other. “Figured I’d come over and say hi, rather than remain the mysterious stranger that bought you a drink.”

“Well, I almost came over, but I don’t know,” she started, glancing at the crowd before she looked up at him again. “Are you worth braving through that many people for?”

“Do I get to prove myself?” he asked, lifting an eyebrow.

She bit her lip as she continued to stare at him. He found himself wanting to be the one biting that lip, and little did he know she was thinking about the same thing at that moment. He had caught her eye the minute he walked in with his friend, and once he was alone she almost bought him a drink, before he beat her to the punch.

“Sure,” she replied, sliding into the booth a little to make room for him. She turned to her friends who were paralyzed in their places as they gawked at him, tilting her head towards the restrooms, a silent plea to them to leave her alone for a few minutes.

She watched them pick up their purses as they left, laughing slightly just as he did once their eyes met again.

“Jensen,” he said, offering his hand.

She smiled, placing her hand in his. “Y/N.”

“So, can I trust you with this?” she asked, holding up the new drink.

He reached for the stem, plucking it out of her hands and bringing the rim of the glass to his lips, taking a slow sip. He cringed at the taste as his features scrunched up, causing her to cackle at his face. The sound was infectious, making him join in as he passed the drink back to her. Between the glint in his eye and the sound of his hearty laugh, she was already willing to call an end to the night and see if he wanted to come over to her apartment.

“The only thing that’s guilty of is being too sweet,” he husked, as he picked his own glass and took a sip, changing the taste in his mouth. “But yeah, you’re good.”

“Thank you,” she said, simply as she sipped it.

“No problem,” he stated, unable to look anywhere else but at her. She was beautiful, and could very well be way out of his league, but nothing had to happen beyond whatever happened tonight.

He told her he was in finance, she told him she was an architect, and they both explained all the challenges that came with those jobs. She had a dog, and he had no pets considering he traveled for work so much. They went back and forth in conversation, smiles, flirtatious looks and light touches of hands passing between them. She leaned closer to him, her eyes drifted over his suit and up into his green orbs, just as her heeled foot grazed up the side of his calf under the table. She smiled softly, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip once more as she shivered at the feel of his fingertips brushing over her knee. His hand slid onto her thigh, over the fabric of her dress as his gaze drifted down to her mouth.

“Well, not to burst this bubble so soon, but… I leave tomorrow,” he informed her, frowning.

She hummed, nodding slowly. “Guess this is over before it even started, huh?

He shook his head, leaning his forehead against hers as his fingers swirled over her skin, at the edge of her dress. “We've got plenty of hours to pass before then, darlin’.”

A soft moan escaped her at the drawl of his words, and she had to try and calm down. This man was going to be the end of her, she knew it already. She had a brief thought about her own behavior because she never acted like this. It had only been about half an hour that they had been talking, and she was already ready to leave with him. She was never this quick to go home with strangers, but the second he walked into the bar she knew she needed to find a way to get him to her apartment and out of the suit he was wearing, fast. So, fuck how impulsive she was being in that moment, because that was exactly what she was going to do.

Jensen was thinking about the same thing. He wasn’t one to rush things like this, but he needed to know what she felt like and how many times he could make her come apart. He really needed to know.

“M-My apartment’s about 20 min-” she started to tell him but was cut off by a gasp, just as his hand slipped under her dress and rested on her thigh, his palm burning against her skin.

“My hotel’s a block from here,” he countered.

She shifted back slightly, smiling up at him. “Lead the way.”

They finished their drinks off in quick swigs, before they both got up from the table and made their way to the bar. She told her friends what was going on, promising to text once she was going home, whether it was tonight or the next morning. She hoped it was the latter. They watched as he paid their tab as well as his, genuinely impressed as one friend wiggled her eyebrows at her. They said their goodbyes as they parted ways outside, before she turned to him. He smirked as he held his hand out for her to take, a warm feeling settling in her belly as she thought about all the things he could possibly do to her.

“Shall we?”

The keycard beeped against the lock, the door opening as Y/N was pushed into the room, Jensen’s plump lips fused to hers in a rough kiss. He kicked the door closed behind him, dropping the card on the floor as she let go of her purse and jacket, trying not to stumble over them. He grabbed her hips, pulling her close as her hands gripped his white shirt tight, the buttons straining as she clenched the material. She started to unbutton it as she kissed him, but he took her hands in his, pulling back and staring deep into her eyes, panting harshly. He reached behind her and pulled at the zip of her dress, peeling it down her shoulders to reveal her black, lace bra. Once her arms were free, he held her close as he walked her back further into the room.

A small smile pulled at her lips, her heart racing at the thought of where this could go. She hummed as he pulled her dress down her body quickly, pushing it down along with her black, lace thong, allowing her to step out of it as it pooled around her feet. She glanced down briefly, suddenly feeling nervous with how exposed she was, but a gentle, hooked finger under her chin had their eyes meeting again. She felt her fears melting away instantly, which surprised her considering she had only known him for half an hour.

“Eyes on me,” he instructed, voice deep and husky as he leaned in, his lips hovering close to hers. “I want to see you lose control while I take you apart.”

“Fuck,” she breathed, biting her lip.

“That’s what you want, isn’t it, darlin’?” he asked, lightly nipping at her jaw. “Want me to ruin you with my fingers?”

“Y-Yes,” she stuttered.

He smirked, letting his hands slide down her back and land on the curve of her ass. He skimmed his palms over the flesh, raising one before he brought it down, hard enough for her to let out a small yelp of surprise. He chuckled, the sound a little sinister but a chill ran through her hearing it. He lightly pushed her arms, seeing her drop back on the bed with a giggle. He took her heels off her feet, shifting away from her as he undressed. She watched him as he stripped off his suit and shirt, feeling her core tighten at the reveal of his incredible torso, her hands already itching to hold onto his broad shoulders. He moved in, hovering over her as he kissed along her neck, her eyelids fluttering as they struggled to remain open. His warm hands drifted over her body, one drifting down to her breasts and pulling the cups of her bra down, as the other slipped between her legs. She gulped as she felt his thick fingers slide between her folds, a small grunt leaving him when he felt her.

“So wet for me already,” he remarked, meeting her gaze as he lightly pinched her nipple between his fingers.

She couldn’t help the moan that fell from her lips, shifting into his touch as he licked and nipped at her pulse, while his fingers continued to run over her, his thumb flicking over her clit. Just as the digits slid into her tight heat, her hands gripped the sheets beneath her. He pumped them slowly at first, groaning as she grinded against him, and he could feel his cock straining against his pants. His fingers picked up the pace a little, his thumb running circles over the swollen nub just as his other hand rolled the pebbled bud between his thumb and forefinger.

“Oh, fuck, y-yeah,” she moaned, wantonly.

She was trying not to close her eyes, to take in the way his eyes focused on her, but it was difficult. She wanted to lose herself in the feeling.

“Fuck, you feel so good around my fingers, sweetheart,” he husked, looking down at her. “You look so beautiful, just like this, ready to come undone.”

“P-Please, I need-” she pleaded, struggling to find the words.

“Oh, I know what you need, darlin’,” he whispered, smirking. “But first, you gotta cum on my fingers, and only when I say you can.”

She whimpered as he worked them faster, the blissful feeling from his actions spreading through every part of her body. She clung to the covers, a soft whine escaping her as she grinded against him, wanting more. She hissed as he applied a harder pressure to her breast, his green orbs dark with lust as he shook his head.

“Do that again and this’ll be over,” he warned. “Only when I say you can and not a second sooner. Got it?”

“Yes,” she gulped.

“Good,” he breathed, grinning as he continued his ministrations while he spoke to her. “You’re gonna be a good girl and listen to me, aren’t ya?”

She nodded, unable to trust her voice to work at that moment. A wicked glint sparkled in his green eyes as they looked at each other, his face barely an inch from hers as her ragged breaths fanned against his lips.

“That’s right,” he smirked. “Can feel how close you are, sweetheart. Wanna feel you gush all over my fingers, and then… then I’m gonna fuck you hard and fast, make you feel it for days.”

“Oh, fuck!” she cried.

She felt her walls clenched around his fingers, just as her core tightened and she knew it wouldn’t be too much longer before she fell over the edge. He continued to tweak her nipple between his fingers, working his other hand into her sex, his thumb flicking over the bundle of nerves, faster and faster as he felt her arousal against the pads of his fingers.

“Cum for me, darlin’,” he groaned, holding her close as they continued to gaze at each other. “Cum for me, soak my fingers.”

She broke their eye contact as her head fell back against the bed, a string of moans falling from her lips as he felt her wetness against his fingers, still pumping them into her as she continued to ride her high. His actions slowed as he pressed a kiss to her cheek, making her huff a short laugh as they finally stopped. She whined slightly at the loss of his fingers once he removed them, but she felt heat pool low in her stomach once more as he pressed one finger against her lips. She obeyed his silent order and took it into her mouth, humming at the taste of herself on his skin. A low grunt came from him as he watched her, his finger leaving her mouth with a wet pop as he brought the other one to his own lips, her arousal on his tongue making him groan.

“Amazing,” he breathed. “I think I want a proper taste…”

Y/N frowned briefly but bit into her lip once more as she saw him drift down her body, onto his knees. Jensen grabbed her hips, feeling his cock twitch in his pants as he spread her thighs, taking in her glistening folds. He ran his thumb over her entrance, making her whimper and him chuckle at how such a simple thing made her weak.

“So perfect,” he muttered, repeating the same action once, twice. “All dripping and swollen just for me.”

He leaned in and wasted no time, his tongue taking a long lick of her folds. A sound halfway between a gasp and moan came from her as she felt the sensation, whimpering as he did the same thing a few times before he slid the talented muscle into her entrance. She cried out as she lost herself in the feeling, her eyes squeezing shut as her hands moved into his hair. She whimpered as his beard scratched against her inner thigh, adding to the pleasure she was feeling. His hands slipped down from her hips under her ass, squeezing the flesh tight as he continued, devouring her like a man starved. Tears stung her eyes as she felt completely overwhelmed by what she was feeling, the need to feel another release coming far quicker than she anticipated.

“J-Jensen, p-please,” she begged, her hands tugging at his strands. “I need to cum again, please make me cum.”

The only response she got from him was a deep grunt vibrating against her as he kept at it, working his tongue into her faster, little nail marks left on her ass cheeks from his grip. It wasn’t long before she felt her walls tighten, her moans getting louder as he moved one hand from her ass onto her clit, rubbing it as quick as he moved his tongue into her.

“Oh, god, yes! Fuck!” she shrieked, feeling the dam break once more.

Jensen groaned against her, holding her close as he lapped up everything she had to give. He was intoxicated by the taste of her, breathing deeply as he drew back, pressing a kiss to her thigh. He stood up slowly, smiling softly at her disheveled state, hair completely a mess, bra still on with the cups pulled down. He reached under her and unhooked it, letting it fall down her arms before he threw it behind him somewhere in the room. He leaned over her and pulled her close, her breasts pressed into his chest as she held onto his shoulders, their lips meeting in a sensual kiss.

“You okay?” he asked, gently as he brushed some strands of hair away from her face.

“Yeah, I just… who the fuck are you and where did you come from?” she replied, giggling. She couldn’t believe he was real.

He chuckled, shrugging as he licked his lips, lightly. “I just aim to please, darlin’.”

Y/N beamed as she moved in, kissing him once more. She moaned into his mouth as he softly sucked at her lip, his hand sliding down to the back of her thigh and pulling it up around his waist. She couldn’t believe how quickly she trusted him, allowing him to do incredibly erotic and intimate things to her, but she felt from the way he looked at her in the bar that she could take him seriously. He pulled his lips away from hers, pecking them lightly in reassurance when she sighed at the loss. She watched him stand up, unbuckle and unzip his dress pants, biting her lip as her walls clenched around nothing in anticipation of feeling all of him when she saw how hard he was.

“Hands and knees,” he ordered.

She felt a shiver run down her back from his authoritative tone, doing as he said and turning onto her stomach, pushing herself on her hands and knees. She teased him by shifting back, the curve of her ass pressing into him, feeling his cock against her. She whined in protest as he moved away slightly, wanting him inside her as soon as possible before she combusted from the torture of waiting.

“Patience, sweetheart,” he muttered, his hands sliding down her back and pushing lightly, moving her further down. “I know you wanna prove what a good girl you are, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” she breathed, leaning her head on her forearms, now flat on the mattress.

Jensen smirked as he shifted closer, taking hold of his shaft and stroking it, slapping the tip against her sex. She whimpered at the feel, squeezing her eyes shut as he rubbed the length through her folds, her slick covering him. He lined up to her entrance, and without another word, sank deep inside her heat. Her mouth fell open as her walls sheathed his girth completely, the sound unable to escape her throat. As promised, he set a brutal yet pleasurable pace, thrusting into her hard and fast as he gripped her hips tight in his hands. She was no doubt going to have bruises in the morning, but she thought of them as a souvenir to an incredible night. Which this definitely was.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he groaned. “So fucking perfect… this is what you wanted, isn’t it, darlin’? Being fucked like this, taking this cock in your tight little pussy?”

“Y-Yes, oh fuck, yes,” she moaned, loudly, not caring how many people heard her in the other rooms.

“Tell me how it feels…”

“So good, oh fuck, it feels so good,” she babbled, her hands clenching the sheets. “Love feeling your cock inside me, fucking me so hard, fuck!”

“Yeah, you do,” he smirked, gazing down at her. “Gonna make you cum so hard on my dick, want you soak every inch of it.”

He pulled her back against him by her hips as he thrusted, the smacking of skin joining their moans of pleasure as he pounded into her, harder and faster. He was chasing the release that he craved, but he wanted to get her there for a third time first. She was getting wetter with each stroke of his cock inside of her, and he could feel her walls contracting around him. The familiar feeling in her core grew, the head of his shaft hitting that sweet spot that drove her wild, and she knew she was close to the edge once more.

“Oh god, fuck, fuck I’m gonna cum-” she whimpered, biting down on her fist.

“Cum,” he commanded, his jaw clenching as he held back.

Y/N slapped her palm over her mouth, a muffled shriek leaving her as the coil within her snapped, her arousal slicking his cock as she came for a third time that night. It was far more shattering than the previous two, her body convulsing from the euphoric bliss coursing through her. She felt herself slowly coming down from her high, his thrusts slowing slightly, but he seemed to have other plans as he suddenly pulled her up into his arms. His hand covered her mouth as hers slipped away, holding onto his thick forearms as her back pressed into his chest, his other hand moving between her thighs as he continued to pound her relentlessly. His fingers rubbed against her clit so fast, she sobbed into his hand as she felt another wave of pleasure, her third orgasm rolling into a fourth.

“Give me one more, darlin’,” he growled, kissing her neck to encourage her when she whimpered and shook her head. “Yes you can. Wanna feel it, one more, darlin’, one more…”

A few tears strayed from her eyes as the wave finally hit her, a scream erupting from her lips which was stifled by his hand. She moaned as she heard his grunts becoming frequent in her ear, until he finally let out a guttural moan when his cock throbbed deep inside her. She hummed as she felt the warm spurts of his seed coat her walls, feeling him slump as he gave her every drop he had to give.

Jensen slowly removed his arms from Y/N, letting her drop down on the bed and stretch out her legs, a small wince leaving her as she felt the cramp in her muscles. He laid down beside her, both of them staring up at the ceiling, the awkwardness of the afterglow beginning. She turned to look at him, biting her lip as she appreciated his side profile, the way his chest moved as he regained his steady breath. Every inch of him was perfect, and it was a shame he was leaving tomorrow.

“Was that okay?” he asked, his deep voice breaking the silence.

She giggled, rolling her eyes playfully. “It was way better than okay.”

He smiled, rolling onto his side and shifting closer to her, looking deep into her eyes. She stared back at him, wondering what he wanted to say considering she could tell he was holding something back.

“You can stay,” he whispered. “If you want to.”

She nodded. She had a feeling that wasn’t what he wanted to tell her, but it was okay. There was no way she was leaving that room after what just happened.

She didn’t want it to be over so soon.

Jensen clipped his silver watch around his wrist, staring out the window to the view of the city in front of him. The sun had risen, and a new day was starting as he got ready to go back home. He glanced over his shoulder, smirking as he saw Y/N stir, her eyes adjusting to the light in the room. She sat up slightly, looking around the room in confusion before she spotted him by the window. She looked over at the bedside and saw the clock read 8:35am. That was far too early for how late they eventually fell asleep the night before.

“Morning,” he muttered, walking over to the bed and sitting down beside her.

“Morning,” she croaked, clearing her throat and trying again.

He chuckled, taking in her soft, sleepy look as she held the sheets close to her chest. “Last night was… it was amazing.”

“Yeah,” she agreed, her voice meek as she smiled at him. “It really was.”

“I gotta get to the airport on time so I have to go now, unfortunately,” he sighed, heavily. “But I got you a late check-out.”

“Thank you,” she said, a little surprised by the kind gesture. “Well, you better go.”

“Yeah,” he whispered, nodding slowly.

“And I think I’m gonna go back to sleep for a while and then order a huge breakfast on your tab,” she added, wiggling her eyebrows as she laughed.

“Damn, that’s a classy move right there,” he complimented, grinning.

A silence fell between them as they stared at each other. Before he got too comfortable, Jensen stood up and dropped the keycard on the nightstand, taking hold of his luggage. With one last look, he winked at her, causing her to beam back at him.

Y/N watched as he disappeared behind the wall, the sound of the door opening and closing making her frown a little. She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t disappointed that she didn’t have longer with him, but she had absolutely no regrets about how the night turned out with him.

He had officially ruined her for other men, and they’d have a hard time competing with the best night of her life.

#spnaubingo #anyfandomkinkbingo #jacklesversebingo23 #Jensen x Female!Reader #Jensen x Female!Reader Smut #Jensen x Female!Reader One Shot #Jensen x Female!Reader Fanfiction #Jensen Ackles Smut #Jensen Ackles One Shot #Jensen Ackles Fanfiction #Supernatural RPF #Supernatural Fanfiction

[cherry-muses]

tom riddle x gn! reader: oneshot

<a/n: oneshot after the image! haven't written in a while so i lowkey feel like this sucks. ps: sorry i disappeared for like 5 months lol i had to graduate. >

tags: mentions of a difficult childhood, orphanage, bullying, hurt/comfort, fluff

He was sat across you, writing his History of Magic essay with his ever-so-neat handwriting. The only sounds you could hear were those of his quill scratching the parchment and of you turning the pages of your Potions textbook.

As Riddle wrote, his other free hand rested on the table, and you couldn’t help but appreciate the fact that he had really pretty hands. Your eyes subtly scanned them and eventually landed on the sleeve of his robes… which seemed to be a little torn and frayed at the edges.

You smiled to yourself, knowing the exact spell required to make the sleeve good as new… secretly hoping that Riddle would give you one of his rare smiles when you did. Perhaps it’d make the boring study session slightly more entertaining, and the rather bleak winter evening more colourful.

You tentatively reached your hand to gently hold his wrist, and gave him a soft smile. “I could fix that… may I?” You asked, gesturing to the torn sleeve.

To your surprise, Tom did not give you even the smallest smile. In fact, he flinched and harshly pulled his hand away, giving you an accusatory glare at the same time. “I’d much appreciate if you wouldn’t disturb me when I’m trying to work. And I know perfectly well to take care of my own clothing, thank you.”, he snapped. “I think I’d much rather spend my evening with someone who isn’t so dull and irritating to the core.”

“I didn’t mean-”, but you were rudely cut off mid-sentence by Riddle slamming his textbook shut, stuffing it into his satchel and storming off, out of the library.

You were left sitting alone in the library, feeling an odd mixture of guilt, anger, and confusion, holding back tears.

It was the next evening, when you were approached by the dark-haired prefect again. You had been reading by the fireplace in the Slytherin common room when he came up to you, fists clenched at his sides in nervousness. “What do you want, Riddle?”, you spoke, rather harshly, as you sat up straight to face him.

“I am… sorry.”, he replied, voice strained as if it was taking him a great deal of effort to get the words out.

You slammed your book shut, tossing it aside on the couch in annoyance. “I am sorry too.”, you replied, not a hint of emotion in your voice.

“You’re sorry?”, he asked, frowning in confusion.

“For assuming we're friends.”

For a split second a look of hurt flashed across his sharp features, until, ever the Slytherin, Riddle schooled his expression to appear vaguely sad.

“I should not have spoken in that way to you.”, he begins.

“No, you shouldn’t have.”, you retort.

You are both silent for a few moments, and the air has a sort of charged tension which makes you feel like either one of you would be storming off at any moment.

It comes as a bit of a surprise, then, when he instead chooses to sit close to you on the black couch, the water from the Great Lake casting a greenish glow upon the two of you.

“I really am sorry. I must admit, out of sheer habit I had assumed the worst intentions out of you.”

Those deep brown irises of his conveyed a kind of sincerity you had never before seen in him. You hoped to Merlin it was genuine.

“It is no excuse but I’d like to…er, explain why I behaved in such a way. Not justify, just explain.”, he said, a request for you to kindly hear him out implicit in his words. You somehow found yourself nodding, silently urging him to continue.

“You know where I grew up. I much prefer to hide it, but somehow your… constant affection has gently coerced me into entrusting to you the things I wish I could hide even from myself. ” He pauses, sighing and staring outside the dungeon windows, into the depths of the Great Lake.

“As would be expected, the orphanage wasn’t made of money. They could hardly feed us twice a day.” He was practically avoiding your eyes now. “My wardrobe essentially consisted of the worn clothes people donated. And, well.” A pause. “My first time on the Hogwarts express, a group of Ravenclaws found it a good enough excuse to remind me of my inferiority… and throw a couple of assorted hexes my way.”

Realization dawned on you, and at once you took his hand in yours, gently caressing his skin with your thumb. “Oh…”

“Well, since then I’ve managed to handle such issues with reparation spells, but I suppose I missed my robe’s sleeve. Which caught your attention yesterday. And… and when you tried to fix it, I just...”

You could bear it no more, and without any warning he was engulfed in a hug. “Tom, I’m so so sorry. I should’ve known.”

“No, it is my fault, for comparing you to someone who was been cruel to me, when you’ve always shown me nothing but the complete opposite.”, he breathed out softly.

There was a look of steely determination on your face now. “Promise me one thing, Riddle.”

“Hmm?”, he inquired, far too occupied with staring into your eyes to bother with actual words.

“Next time you feel like that, please… please just talk to me.”, you request. “I hate when we hurt each other in such a way.”

“Anything you ask.”, he says. You beam at him and gently kiss his forehead

The rest of the evening was spent cuddling on that couch, whispering sweet nothings to one another and watching the fish swim by in the lake.

#tom riddle #tom riddle x reader #slytherin #slytherin boys #tom marvolo riddle #tom riddle x you #tom riddle x oc #harry potter fandom #wizarding world

[springalwayscomes]

Closer: Too Close (I)

Closer Closer: Too Close (Teaser) Next up: Closer: Too Close Masterlist Taglist

Plot: To have each other close is something that you both always wanted, in a way or another. It’s just that… closer may be too close for you to handle.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Domestic, Humor, Friends to Lovers

Wordcount: 47.5k

Content Warning: Dirty talk, swearing, pining, mentions of masturbation, masturbation, praise, cunnilingus, cum eating, unprotected sex, mentions of blowjob, squirting, public sex, fingering, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, love making, creampie

Author’s Note: Hello, here it is!! Honestly I didn’t think I would write a second part to Closer, I felt like the end of it was the best I could give to these two, but it received so much love and when I read it again I couldn’t hold myself back, they just make me want to write more about them. Still, I consider the first part the main one, you can read that without having to read this. I would add though, that these two here just make me want to scream for the bond they have so I hope you’ll like this as well. I didn’t say the time I would publish it to feel a little more relaxed with the editing but you asked me before and I thought I’d make it on time for 1 am KST so sorry if I kept you waiting! I hope you’ll like this, and happy birthday Jungkook! Take this as a little gift💜

P.s. I hate tumblr, I had to split the story in different parts because it was too slow and apparently every post has a limit of 1000 blocks, so here you’ll be able to finish your reading:

Closer: Too Close, it’s all part of the same story!

If you want to be tagged in my taglist to get notified when my other works will come out let me know here, under this post, with a message or an ask. Feel free to talk to me for whatever, I always appreciate your messages!🫶🏻💜

Jungkook wishes you didn’t look so beautiful. So pretty in his arms, all for him to admire as your breaths come out in soft sighs, pillowy lips so ready to be kissed. Having you like this makes his mind spin. Fuck, how lucky he must’ve been in his past life. He wonders if there you met him too, if it was in the same way, if you were the same as now. You must’ve been a nymph, surely. Or a princess, the sun, a rainbow maybe. It’s weird, how in this life you still manage to be all of that for him. 

At some point you fell asleep. In his arms, naturally and lovingly, your fingers stopped tracing patterns on his abdomen, your breath got deeper, your eyelashes fluttered shut, you nose nuzzled against his chest and all he could think about was how much he loves you. How you put the stars in his skies, how you make his world spin. And suddenly, he couldn’t sleep. Not with you beside him, your warmth around him after making love to him for the first time. He just can’t, too taken by the sight of you. 

So adorable, he scrunches his nose. So pretty. His arms wrap tighter around you, a soft and sweet kiss lays on your head and Jungkook can’t believe he finally gets to do this, have you whole. You love him. Fuck, it feels surreal. You love him, you fucking do. He’s too excited to sleep, too happy. Overwhelmed, would be the right word. 

He strokes a strand of your hair behind your ear and a second later you’re murmuring something in your sleep, lips pouty and eyebrows furrowed. He giggles at your cuteness, not really understanding what you’re saying until your fingers dip into the skin of his chest.

«Koo» your voice is grumpy and low and Jungkook holds you tighter until there isn’t any space left. 

«Baby» he coos, drunk smile on his face. You’re probably dreaming, still he can’t  hold himself back.

«Love you» you murmur.

The silence in the room makes your words louder even though they came out so low. His heart thumps against his rib cage and suddenly he finds it hard to breathe. Your scent takes over him, his hands feel heavier on your skin, eyes lost on your face.

«Are you awake?» he mumbles. Your answer doesn’t come, silence still filling the air and your soft breath accompanying it. 

«Please» he whines, it’s soft and gentle and unexpectedly he’s nuzzling his nose into the crook of your neck.  

«Hhm» your annoyed moan makes him smile on your skin, just right before he leaves a peck on it. 

«Please» he stretches the word out, still nuzzling his nose into you. 

«Anno- ying» you groan, raspy voice. Jungkook hums as his lips stretch against you, his hands coming to stroke your hair.

«What do you want?» you mumble in your sleep.

«Sorry I woke you» he whispers. You shake your head, sleepy but holding tighter to him. 

«What is it?» 

He doesn’t know it either.

«Can’t sleep beside you» his answer makes your head shoot up, puffy eyes staring at him and view foggy.

«You want me to go to my bed?» you ask meekly. You wish you didn’t have to ask, it feels so good to sleep in his arms. Tomorrow he has to work though, and sleep is very much needed, so maybe you should go. 

«Fuck, no» he shakes his head eagerly, eyes staring right up into yours.

«Why would I want that?» 

«You said you-» you yawn «you can’t sleep beside me»

Jungkook scrunches his nose, cuteness overloaded. It makes your senses wake up just to pinch it between your fingers, his lips pouting when you do so. 

His hands travel to the back of your legs, they grab your skin lightly and he opens your left one with a soft motion, pushing himself between them for as much as he can from the position. He takes in your scent and hugs you tight, nose brushing on your clavicle.

«Not in that way» he murmurs, a soft dreamy sigh leaving his lips. Your heart clenches in your chest, now you’re even more awake. You love him so much. You wish you could stay like this all day, in bed with his hair tickling your skin and his soft breath fanning your skin. 

He hides his face against you, feels the warmth of you in his arms. 

«Feeling needy» he whines, words muffled against you and voice weak almost as he’s succumbing to your presence, cheeks reddish. He hides more into you.

«Needy?» you coo. Jungkook nods against you, literally shielding his face from your view. You stroke his hair, kiss the crown of his head. 

«You woke me up cause you’re feeling needy?» you smile.

He whines against you, lips pouting again.

«I shouldn’t have» he mumbles, slightly embarrassed. You love it, like this. Getting to see him in this way, in this state, fragile and vulnerable, all for you to take care of. It makes you smile wider.

«Why?» you breathe, your fingers slide down behind his neck. He whines again.

«Don’t make fun of me» 

«I’m not» you kiss his head.

«You can do it as much as you want» you smile.

He shakes his head against you.

«You should sleep» 

«Then let’s sleep» you fake a yawn, the tender hand that was stroking his skin comes back at your side and Jungkook wails again. 

«So annoying» he mumbles. You hold back your laughter, closing your eyes. Silence echoes in the air and for a bunch of seconds he waits for you to burst out in a melodic laugh, but you don’t, so all he can do is groan cutely, finally getting away from his hideout and poking your cheek. The roundness of it when you smile makes him scrunch his nose again, suddenly feeling the need to dive into the space do your neck again. He lays his head just there, eyelashes fluttering on your skin.

«What are you needy for?» you mumble, your hand moving back to its original place. He hums contently, shaking his head.

«Don’t know» he sighs.

«Cuddles?» you coo. You don’t care if you’re going to fall asleep at work tomorrow. You don’t give a shit, not when he’s lying in your hold and it took you so fucking much to realise that what you’re feeling in your chest isn’t just pure affection. You want to scatter love all over him and give him everything he needs, every single thing. 

«Mngh… cuddles» he echoes softly, feeling the word and the way it sounds so sweet when his mind links it your face. He nods, a peck on your neck. 

«Don’t know what I want-» he gulps «just want you close» 

Your leg wraps around his waist, another kiss on his head.

«Feeling overwhelmed» he lets out.

«Overwhelmed?» you massage his shoulders. Jungkook shivers against you and it makes you giggle silently.

«Hhm,» he hums «still not used to this»

You nod. You’re not either. You wish you could keep him in your pocket, take him to work and just feel his presence beside you for the whole day tomorrow. You need time to get used to this, to him being your person, even though he’s always been. You wish you had the whole day, you’d spend it on the couch and at home out of reach of public’s eyes, still getting used to how it feels to wrap your arms around each other with such tenderness and intimacy.

«Me neither baby» you puff. His hand gets to your back, fingers rubbing underneath his shirt on the soft skin. It makes him hold his breath, it’s shaky when it comes out. 

«Tighter» he mewls. You squeeze him, his chest against you and his nose deep into your skin, eyes closed as he lingers in the feeling. 

«Love you so much» he murmurs. 

Jungkook feels so vulnerable, like he could break anytime in your arms, like his heart is out of his chest, thumping and clenching and beating just for you, all for you. He feels exposed, totally frail and friable, even though your arms around him and your kisses on his head are the safest fort. 

«I love you» you say back. And god, he doesn’t care if you already said it a bunch of times tonight, if you’ll say it a handful tomorrow and the next day, twenty times the next week and an infinity of them for the others to come, he’ll never get used to it, never. 

You kiss his neck, your arms come on his back to relax his muscles. And suddenly, he’s squirming in your hold, shivers on his skin that make him lose his mind, all the love in his chest setting fire to his limbs. 

«What is it?» you whisper. Jungkook nuzzles against you desperately, his hands coming down on your asscheeks. He kneads the skin, squeezes it between his fingers, pushes your body more into his.

«Wanna feel you» it’s all he mumbles. 

You’re combusting, cheeks already hot and a drunk smile taking over your face, eyes glittering with love. Fuck, you do love him. So much, so deep, so effortlessly, so consumingly. You’re in every cell of his body, screaming and pleading to have you in every possible way. Your hands cup the back of his head, you pull him slightly to make him look at you, his big eyes are moist, glassy with all the intensity of what he’s feeling. 

«You make me lose it,» you exhale through your mouth «feel like I’m going to explode from how much I love you»

You see his eyebrows furrow, the emotions in his stare take over him and all he can do is smile in such a way that your mind goes blank; it’s full of love, full of tenderness, adoration, weakness. Like he gives up on himself and just drains into you and you and only you. His hand cups your cheeks, soft and gentle his fingers stroke your skin, his forehead touches against yours as the fingers of his other hand dig into your waist.

«Lose it then,» he whispers «please» totally breathless. Fuck, you do. All you can do is lose it, succumb, melt. 

Your lips push against him, your hands slide between your bodies, your digits caress his chest, nails lightly dig into his skin, so soft but firm. Jungkook hisses, his cock twitches and all he manages to do is moan and moan and moan again in your mouth. It makes you wet, desperate just like him. 

«Fuck» he whines against your lips, your pads caressing his nipple. 

«Love it when you whine like that» you breathe, your lips kissing his neck. He throws his head back, leaving you all the space you need as he shudders with his hands on your thighs. 

«So- so desperate» it’s a wail, and you can’t think straight, can’t think properly. 

Your tongue licks his clavicle, you take his nipple in your mouth, suck it just enough to make him look back at you, you have the ability to turn him into a puddle without doing anything. Your fingers link around the band of his boxers, pushing them down enough to get a hold of the skin underneath, and you can’t help but squeeze his firm asscheek in your hand, lips leaving kisses on his chest. Jungkook is out of breath already, ruts his cock against you, fully hard and begging to be inside you. 

«Clothes- bra, please» he can’t speak, doesn’t even know how to formulate a sentence properly. It makes you giggle against his abs, your eyes falling on his face. His cheeks are flushed, hair in the way, lips swollen from all the kisses you already shared. You’re so impatient that you take off your bra and your panties without even realising it, his boxers too, and a second later you’re straddling him on the bed, your core pushing against the muscle of his thigh and your hands all over him. He cups your breast, pulls you to him and cages his strong arms around you with such delicacy, as if you were made of glass. Your nipples brush against his chest and a deep moan escapes your mouth, his head spins. It’s you, it’s fucking you. The meaning of all this,  the reason of everything. You make him breathless, crazy, desperate. 

«Can’t-» he breathes hard «can’t even speak»

«It’s okay, baby» you kiss his lips.

He shakes his head, his fingers intertwine with yours and you smile against his lips as he hisses, his cock leaking precum. You feel it twitch against your belly and hell, you’re really going to lose it; seeing him like this, never anyone turned you on so much, this bad. Only him, he’s the only one. The only one that makes you think that you’d be down to do anything, to try anything with. 

«Please» he begs. Your hand wraps around him, his half lidded eyes look at you as you guide him into you, the feeling intoxicating. Jungkook throws his head back on the pillow as soon as his cockhead caresses your core, your wetness mixing with his precum as you let him enter, filling you up slowly and so incredibly good. 

He finds himself totally absorbed, rapted by the way you make him feel. Not once in his life he felt this way, loved so deeply, craved so much, there was not a single time when he felt the need to surrender to someone in this maddening, sweet and consuming way. It’s just… you. It’s your ways, your motions, your soul, the safeness he’s engulfed in when you’re with him, your love. He wants to succumb even more, get so lost that he can barely breath cause fuck, you’re the essence of everything. There’s no point if it’s not you, no meaning. 

«Love, baby- nngh, fuck» he wails. His cheeks are reddish, eyes closed shut and lips open and swollen, eyebrows contracted in pleasure as you fully take him. 

Your head spins as you move slowly, his lids open to meet your gaze and he… he never felt so loved. The way you look at him makes his chest heavier, fuller. He’ll never get used to it. His hands roam your body, his touch makes your skin fire up, every inch feels like an eternity, ink marking you of abstract emotions that could never be explained. He cups your breast and opens his legs just enough to feel more comfortable, bending them at his knees against the mattress, his breath fans your skin. Your movements pick up, your hips move more on his and the way his cock fills you up so beautifully makes you moan on top of him, the angle slightly changed from the movement of his legs. Jungkook digs his  fingers into your skin, your hand on his chest and the other supporting your weight on the bed, your hair fall at your sides and built up walls to shield you and him from the rest of the world. His eyes mark every inch of skin from your eyes to your lips, they flutter and close and then open again, dark and glittery they look at you with all the fondness and vulnerability he never showed to anyone, whines escaping his mouth and ending with nothing but dull silence and the sound of your wetness.

He pushes you more into him, chest entirely against his, nipples tight to his pecs, the feeling consuming and never enough. His arm wraps around your back again and he links his hand to yours, your full weight now against him without the support of your limb on the bed. Jungkook kisses your neck, palms your asscheek and squeezes the skin, pushes you onto him more. He shivers underneath you, the pleasure of having you so intimately makes him throb inside you with every thrust, already too close to his release, your moans in his ears and your hands travelling behind his shoulder blades. It’s needy and full of vulnerability, hands roaming each other’s bodies just for the need of having you close, closer, to get more from each other than what you’re already giving. To belong more, to love harder.

Everything is perfect, he is perfect. You wish you could have him like this everyday, every second, feel him this close forever. Jungkook’s moans vibrate against your skin, both of his hands on your ass as he moves his hips upwards meeting your movements. The pleasure is too much, it’s too good. 

Your head falls on his chest as you stop your motions, he keeps you in place with his hands on your asscheeks, cock rutting inside you slightly faster but still so fucking sweet and alluring. Your chest is bursting, heart beating so loud that you hear it in your ears, body on fire with the warmth of him, sweats mixing together. 

«Tell- tell me you love me» he whispers, a kiss lays on the crown of your head as your head is still lingering on his chest. You nod against him, kiss the ripples of the muscles between his pecs. 

«Love you, I love you» you moan. His breath seems to get even heavier, your walls pulsate around him and they make his cock feel even bigger inside you, the fullness too good to be real. 

«Love you, love every- oh my god, Jungkook» your whine makes him leak even more precum, your juices together are so slippery that the sounds in the room are totally filthy and unfiltered. 

«Love everything about you, every cell of you. Love you, love you» you breathe. Jungkook is on the edge, your words light up a fire that doesn’t seem to simmer down, the taste of his orgasm already hovers over him and your skin under his fingers burns, the fullness of his hands with your flesh makes him feel the luckiest man in the world. 

«Baby, fuck» he moan, his head falling backwards on the pillows. You raise yours, look at him to take in the expanse of his neck, eyes glued to your love. 

«When you- nngh» he shudders under you, face contracted in bliss, «when you sp-speak like tha-ath» he whines. 

You shake, you’re not really sure if it’s because of the pleasure or because of how he looks, how he sounds. He ruins you, in every way possible. He ruins you with his whines, with how much he loves you so deeply and profoundly, with all of him; you’re so fucking in love that you can’t hold it back and all you want to do is explode and fucking let him know; that you’re sorry, cause he hurt so much, cause you made him worry, that you didn’t realise sooner. That you love him, so much you can’t put it into words.

«I love you» you kiss the side of his neck, lips tracing a wet path until you get to his jaw, his chin, the mole under his lips. You don’t kiss them though, stay on them as you speak and breathe hard, moan on top of him as you lips brush against his: «Love you so much I can’t hold it. Wanna have you all for me, only me. Want you every night, every day» 

Jungkook is in a haze, his fingers dig deeper into your skin until he realises that he wants to feel more of you, so they travel on your back, one rests there and the other cups your cheek, his eyes stare at your face trying as much as he can to keep them open. You’re so beautiful, look so ethereal, so angelic.

«I want to have all of you. Wanna be your safe place, wanna be yours. Forever, never want this to end» you shiver under his gaze. And fuck, all he can do is kiss you, so deep and passionate that you both feel like you’re about to combust together. It’s too much, for the both of you. Too good, too deep, too beautiful. 

«Never wanna lose this» you breathe. Jungkook nods eagerly, he wishes he could say that yes, fuck he’d follow you in another life too, the next one and the next one afterwards, the one before this if he could go back to it. In every single one, every single version of you, every fucking time. 

«Not- not gonna hap-pen» he stumbles on his words, lips speaking against you in slow movements too taken aback from how good it feels.

«Loved you- for so long, baby. Not- not gonna lose this, ever» it’s all he manages to blurt out, your hands are staining his chest and they leave love stains that will be hard to wash away, to ever forget. 

«Kiss me, pl- please» he shudders. You lock your lips with his and Jungkook feels totally engulfed, loved all over, totally safe and sound. Your tongues slide with each other, whimpers in your mouth as he moves slowly inside you, eyes stinging even though they are shut, breaths ragged. The way he squeezes every part of you, feels his cock swollen and throbbing against your g-spot, your soft lips so lovingly, your scent all around him. Shit, the things he’d do for you. The love he wants to give, the amount he wants to take.

Your kiss makes him dive deeper, Jungkook is totally lost and exposed, every single part of him displayed for you and totally vulnerable, so ready for you to take over. You could take everything, all of him, every single part. And fuck, you do, and you make him yours. So yours that all he can do is whimper and whine in your mouth, his hips stuttering as he cums inside you, body writhing under yours, your walls squeezing him tight as you come on top of him, legs trembling with aftershocks, the wave of pleasure too much to hold back and too sweet to decline. 

He kisses you for long, even while the both of you cum your lips stay on each other, after you come down from your climax, when the feeling is still too sweet to let go. Your arms stay around each other, your skins glide and his cock is still so deep, both of your juices on the base of his length, still moving slowly. It’s so heavenly and blissful that all you want is for him to never let go, stay inside you for as much as he can. 

Jungkook keeps you close, eyes shut as you both keep exchanging love, never getting tired. When you smile against his mouth you feel his heart pound underneath you and your digits dig into his chest, his rosy cheeks waiting for you hands to cup them as you slowly part from him. Jungkook looks totally fucked out, but more from the feeling of having each other like this than the act of what you just did itself, and it makes you heart beat even louder. Not even a moment later he’s smiling as gloriously as the morning sky, lips stretching and bunny teeth showing, eyes glittering with emotions that still haven’t been described yet by words, the meaning of them too deep and heavy to just be translated in letters. 

Mondays are awful, absolute hell for who gets to spend the weekend relaxing and for those who don’t, sometimes you wonder if it’s the same for who works on Saturday too, maybe it would be better to work and relax on Sunday and have a free day during the week, like Eunji. 

Today though, it’s especially worse. Having to leave Jungkook’s arms makes your mood drop even before you’re fully awake, already craving for the evening to come. 

You wish you could stay in bed more, lay beside him and watch him sleep, hear his soft breaths and linger in the warmth of his body. He’s still naked, the memories of yesterday night still fresh and replaying in your mind, a drunk love smile invading your features and reassuring you at least a little bit. You were too into each other to even get up and dress for the night, your clothes still on the floor. You didn’t even wash and the thought makes you grimace. You need a shower, absolutely. Not before you dig your lips into his puffy cheeks though. 

His hair are all over the place, arms wrapped around you so tight that you find it hard to move, legs intertwined and holding you down, your head at the height of his chest. You move slow and try your best not to wake him up, he snores lightly and you bite your lips to hold back a giggle. He’s so beautiful that you feel like crying, you wish you could paint him suddenly. Your kiss lays on his cheek, the fullness of it makes you scrunch your nose and suddenly he’s writhing underneath you, grumpy and sleepy. You still but kiss him anyway, his arms holding you tighter. He smiles as he realises what’s happening, heart thumbing first thing in the morning. 

«Sleep more» he mumbles. His voice is raspy and low and you mentally pin to your mind that you want to spend a full morning with him in bed as soon as you can, possibly on Saturday. 

«I have to get ready» you say. Jungkook whines, shaking his head and moving his legs, he creates a cage around you with his right one, throws it over your hip and pulls you against him with the ball of his foot. He shivers when he feels your bare skin against his cock, only now realising that you’re still both naked from last night. 

«How much time do we have?» he has his eyes closed, lips pouty as he speaks.

You try to move to get a grab of his phone on his nightstand since yours is still in the clothes on the floor, but he doesn’t seem to get it and only whines at you, wrapping around you tighter.

«Let me check the time» you smile. He seems to loosen up his hold and you manage to pass his shoulder and get his phone from behind him. 

«I have to be out in thirty» you nod.

He huffs annoyed, he’s not ready to let go of you yet.

«I’ll take you» he mumbles. You shake your head.

«Sleep some more»

«Please? Let me take you» he whines and pouts and all you can do is deeply breathe in. Too cute.

«Will you make it on time?» you blurt. He beams widely, nodding yes.

«I’ll be on time,» he keeps nodding «are we taking a shower?» 

Your eyebrows furrow, his eyes are puffy as he looks at your confused expression.

«We?»

He nods again, a peck on the tip of your nose. 

«We didn’t wash last night» he explains. 

«We’re showering, but in different bathrooms» you’re already trying to free yourself from him when you speak, Jungkook’s pouty lips in deep contrast with the strength of his body as he keeps you against him. 

«Why?» he mewls. 

«We don’t have time to shower together» you huff. He shakes his head.

«It’s the same as showering on your own! We’ll be fast, I promise» 

«Jungkook, no. Let me get up» his arms loosen around you, giving you the space to free yourself. He knows that tone, very well. It leaves him taken aback though, especially in such a situation when a second before you were smiling at him. He stays still, lets you get out of the bed and looks at you as you stand up, fully naked for his eyes. You pick up your garments, check the notifications on your phone. After you’re done you turn to him, push your knee on the bed and bend towards him. The kiss you leave on his forehead makes his chest burn and fill with happiness again, his hands cupping your cheeks as he makes you still in place. He sits up and kisses your lips, a soft peck that leaves its mark on you for the rest of the day. You smile softly and a second later you’re out of his bedroom.

Your day has been awful, one of those that you want to forget, call it a day and just wake up tomorrow. You had a three hour meeting that never seemed to end, one of your clients was rude and you almost ended up throwing him your notebook, hoping to hit him right in the face. You’re not the kind of person who looses her calm easily, but he spurred you on so much that you lost it for a second, your fist thumping against the table. You had a break of twenty minutes to eat lunch and went back to your office to finish reading the papers of your next client, after waiting for him for thirty minutes you called him just to hear him say that he forgot about the appointment. Thank god it’s over, is all you can think about. 

Jungkook called you at lunch, his bubbly tone reassured you as you ate your salad, telling you how is morning went. 

Finally, you get out of the building, eyes roaming on the street for your taxi. You sigh relieved when you finally sit inside, the driver already starting the engine to take you to Taehyung’s place. The road is not really long but there’s a little bit of traffic so all you can do is stare outside and listen to the music coming from the radio until your phone rings, Jungkook’s name lights up the screen and your lips stretch in advance as you bring it to your ear.

«Kook» you call.

He beams as he keeps his eyes on the road.

«I’m coming to get you but there’s a bit of traffic. I think I’ll be there in-»

«Oh, you’re coming?» you echo.

«I booked a taxi, I’m on my way already» 

This morning he didn’t tell you he would come and pick you up from work, at lunch neither. 

«Of course I’m coming» he speaks slowly. His tone is low and he sounds definitely less bright then when you started the call. 

«You didn’t tell me» you murmur. Jungkook frowns.

«I thought it was obvious» he mumbles. He’s disappointed but all he can do for now is turn on the left and get back to the main road. 

«Are you still going to Taehyung’s?» 

«Of course» you nod. You wait for him to say something but silence fills the air and you end up staring outside once more.

«Are you mad?» you shrink in your seat.

Jungkook munches on the inside of his lips, head shaking.

«No,» he mumbles «just disappointed. I wanted to spend some time together before going»

«Oh, I’m sorry» you sigh. 

«I didn’t think about it, I just-»

«It’s okay, baby. Don’t worry» he smiles a bit. Your tone sounds low and it’s far from what he wanted for you to sound like when he called.

«Just call me next time» he smiles more.

«I will» you nod.

«I’ll be there in ten minutes I think, is there so much traffic?» you ask. The road that you’re on seems slightly more free than the one before, there are a lot of cars but it’s not too bad, you can still move without having to stop every two minutes. 

Jungkook huffs.

«A little. I guess it will take me twenty minutes at least. Are they ordering dinner or cooking?»

«Hoseok told me they want to eat pizza» you inform. 

«Can you order for me too?» he looks at the screen almost as if you could see his pouty lips.

«Do you want your usual?» 

«Yes,» he nods «I’m so hungry» 

«You ate too little at lunch» you scold. Jungkook shrugs as he finally turns around and enters the main road. 

«I wasn’t that hungry at lunch» 

«I know but you should eat enough to get you to dinner» you sing-song. 

«Ugh, so annoying» he sighs, a smile stretching on his face. You shake your head, eyes going back to the street.

«I’m almost there, see you in a bit?» 

He nods.

«Yes, I’m on the main road. See you in a bit» 

You’re about to close the call when he calls your name again.

«Y/n?» 

«Mh?» you hum. He bites on his lower lip, a bubbly feeling making its way in his chest.

«I love you» he hums back, voice soft. It comes out too hard to hold back your smile, cheeks burning.

«I love you too»

Jungkook wishes you didn’t agree to spend your evening like this. All he could think about today was how much he wanted work to end so that he could come and pick you up, go home and spend some time together. Watching a movie, cooking, laying in bed, whatever would have been fine as long as he could’ve basked in you and your presence. When he saw the messages on your group chat after lunch, he didn’t think you would say yes but after twenty minutes, your reply lit up his screen and all he could do was agree too. He didn’t want to stay home alone if he could be with you somewhere else so he didn’t have any choice left. As he stares at his reflection in the elevator though, he doesn’t look as gloomy as it sounds. His cheeks are full, a beam on his face at the thought of the reaction of your friends at the news of what happened, it makes him eager to get out from the doors and knock at the apartment.

Yoongi opens the door, Hyunjoo by his side smiling at the maknae. He takes his shoes off and lets them at the entrance, taking in the sight of the room as he greets his friends. 

«Y/n?» he asks to Jimin after Taehyung pats him on the shoulder. His friend points at the kitchen.

«In the kitchen,» he answers «she’s with Eunji» 

Jungkook nods, his friend furrows his eyebrows and pouts slightly as he nods, as to say “go and get her”. It makes Jungkook lick his lips, eyes travelling to the door of the kitchen as he shakes his head. 

«Don’t think so but-» Eunji stops talking when the door opens, her eyes scanning the intruder and then going back to the counter, she stirs something in the pan without even bowing to him, too used to each others’ presence. 

«Aren’t we getting pizza?» Jungkook asks as he comes in. She nods at him, his eyes smiling at you. 

«Didn’t feel like eating that much, I ate a lot at lunch» she answers. You chuckle softly.

«Yeah, yeah» you move your head to a beat that only you can hear «Are you beatboxing?» you laugh.

Jungkook bursts out laughing, Eunji seems to understand your joke only after a few seconds.

«Jimin tells me I speak in rhymes a lot these days» she laughs.

«Please don’t get used to it» Jungkook titters at her, stopping in the middle of the room. Eunji shakes her head, focusing on the food and he looks at you with his eyes all smiley and glittery. You find your insides melting and all you can do is smile back, getting a handful of the napkins on the counter and turning around it. You walk towards him, Jungkook is about to open his arms at you but you seem to fasten your pace and a second later you’re passing beside him like he wasn’t there in the first place. He sees you walk out of the kitchen and turn the corner, taking the napkins with you to set the table in the living room. 

He stays still for a minute, Eunji humming as she cooks totally unaware of what just happened and of his confused mind. Why would you do that? 

«When’s dinner coming?» his friend yells from in front of him. He blinks at the wall, Jin responding from the other room.

«In twenty» 

Eunji nods to herself, turning around to Jungkook.

«Can you tell Jimin to come?» she asks. He nods, not really understanding.

«Can’t you yell some more?» he teases. Eunji rolls her eyes at him.

«You’re a good friend, Jungkook» she smiles annoyingly and he just shakes his head, already strolling to the living room to get Jimin. When his friend leaves for the kitchen, he realises you’re nowhere to be seen. 

He wanders around the house for a bit, goes to the balcony, peeks into the gym space, turns in the hallway until he stops in front of the bathroom. He stills for a second pondering on what to do, maybe you’re inside? 

«Y/n?» he calls. Your hum confirms his thoughts. 

«Can I come in?» 

A second later the handle lowers and your face shows in front of him, nodding and  about to walk out. He grabs your wrist sweetly, eyes meeting yours as he stops you in place. You look taken aback, even more when he guides you inside and shuts the door behind you. 

«What are you doing?» you ask. Jungkook shakes his head.

«Did something happen?» he questions munching on the inside of his lips. You shake your head.

«Nothing happened. Why?» you ask back. He pouts in respond. 

«You didn’t greet me» he murmurs low. Your smile softens his insides as you get closer to him. 

«Poor baby» you mumble sweetly, hand cupping his cheek. 

«You wanted a kiss?» you coo. 

«Sorry, didn’t want to do it in front of Eunji» 

Jungkook’s mouth opens slightly, not really expecting your words. He doesn’t manage to answer back, your lips touch his and all he does is melt into you, the way your petals feel so soft and full, the taste of your lip balm so sweet. It’s slow and lovely, your thumb brushes against his cheek and he turns into a puddle right away, eyelashes fluttering. 

«Missed you so much» he whispers against you, your heart clenches.

«I missed you too» your hands reach his nape, you caress his head as he kisses your cheek, giggles erupting from his chest when you tickle a sweet spot behind his ear, his nose scrunching cutely. 

«Sorry about before. And the taxi. I really didn’t think-» he pecks your lips.

«It’s all fine. Don’t worry» another peck.

«I wish we stayed home tonight,» another one «wanted to cook you dinner»

«Let’s do it tomorrow?» you ask. Jungkook nods as he lets his arms wrap around your waist, squeezing you to him.

«Wait, did you come because of me?» you giggle. He nods against you, kissing the tip of your nose. You shriek when he unexpectedly grabs you by the back of your thighs, he laughs at your reaction as he places you on the sink, your knees at the sides of his waist and his hands going back to your back. 

«Sshh» he chuckles, his forefinger on his lips. You shake your head, his hands cup your face and you find yourself giggling when his lips kiss every inch of your face quickly and endlessly, pecks left on your nose, lips, chin, your cheek, your forehead. Jungkook giggles with you as he does so, just the melody of your laughter is enough to make him feel as light as a feather. 

«So pretty» he coos. 

«Stop, it’s ticklish» you giggle. He shakes his head, leaving another peck on the tip of your nose. You have to grab him by his cheeks and pull him to you to make him stop, your kiss stilling him in place, totally taken aback. For a second, he doesn’t move, his mind goes back to how worried he was yesterday at lunch when he thought he had lost his best friend. It makes him beam against you when you part and scrunch your nose at him, cutely angry for not responding the kiss. He kisses you right back, your soft and airy giggles fill up the air again as he rubs his nose against yours sharing an eskimo kiss. 

«Yes» he blurts out stilling. You raise your eyebrows confused.

«I came because of you. Why did you agree? Couldn’t we stay at home?» he whines.

«Usually we don’t go to places together if we don’t feel like it» you wonder. Jungkook parts a little.

«We don’t. But I thought- after what happened yesterday I thought-» he stutters a bit «we could stay home and- I don’t know» he looks down.

«I wanted to be with you and… don’t know, whatever would’ve been good»

«Oh» you let out. Jungkook doesn’t budge in front of you, eyes back on your face and expression a bit disappointed. 

«Baby, I’m really sorry. I suck, sorry» you murmur «I’m sorry about the taxi and before and this too. It’s just- it’s new and- I thought about staying home too and I wanted it a lot but- I don’t know, we didn’t talk about it and when Taehyung asked I just said yes out of habit. I thought you wanted to come, I should’ve-»

«Hey stop, stop» he rubs his nose against yours once more.

«It’s okay» he kisses the tip. 

«It just hurts a bit cause I thought that you didn’t want to stay home? Like- of course you would want to spend time with our friends but- after what happened I thought we both wanted to be with each other and- just-»

«I want to. I really, really want to. Really» you nod.

«I thought about you all day long. I had a shitty day and what got me through it was the thought of coming home to you. I wanted to cuddle or just do anything too. I don’t know, when he asked I just- I’m not good at this yet. Like, I don’t think I can balance our relationship yet. I’m used to us being friends and spending time like this, I didn’t think you would mind coming here cause that’s what we usually do, I said yes cause I thought you would want to come. I’m - I’m sorry» your rant comes to an end and you’re out of breath, Jungkook’s lips are fighting a smile as he tries to stay lucid for a second.

«We need to communicate better,» he sighs, the smile taking over him «definitely» he adds.

«I’ll tell you about my plans and you can tell me yours. It’s better, isn’t it?» his forehead touches yours as his arms wrap around you, he pushes himself to you, hugging you tight and never wanting to let go. You hum on his face, slightly nodding for as much as the position allows.

«So, will we do that tomorrow? Stay home?» you mumble. 

«If you want to» he breathes. You nod eagerly, parting from him.

«Thanks god, yes I want to. Wanted to stay home today too» you giggle. Jungkook loses his sanity, your essence invades every cell of him and makes them go crazy with affection.

«Do you want to leave?» he chuckles. 

«You think we could? I mean- wouldn’t it be weird?» 

«Why would it?» he kisses your cheek. You use your feet to bring him closer, wrapping your legs around him and when he looks at you his eyes are full of tenderness.

«They don’t know yet» you shrug.

«We could just be tired. And we could tell them» he whispers, his fingers brush away a hair that’s about to come in the way of your eye. You hold his wrist and stop his movement, the soft kiss that you lay on the back of his hand makes his mind weak and the way you intertwine your fingers with his it’s even worse.

«Do you really want to leave?» you ask. He raises his eyebrows.

«After dinner? We eat and go» he mumbles. It makes you laugh, it’s totally a Jungkook thing to do. 

«Never say no to pizza» you joke, his cheeks getting fuller as he stares at you with his big dark eyes.

«I would now, but Tae payed for them. It would be rude» 

«I know, I was just joking. When you’re hungry you malfunction, usually» you explain. He blows on your face faking annoyance.

«Let’s go home after we eat» you nod. He pecks your lips happily.

«Great» he chimes, bunny teeth showing from how wide he’s smiling. 

«Can I get another kiss?» 

You don’t even let him take in your actions, already pulling him to you and placing your lips on his, totally rushed and needy to feel the softness of his petals. He moans against you, your tongue slides inside his mouth and you feel like on the edge of a cliff with your heart in your throat and your senses tingling. You cradle his hair with your fingers, caress his head as you deepen the kiss, eyes closed. Jungkook feels himself getting closer to losing his hold on the world with you fitting so sweetly in his arms. If he thinks he has to let go to go back to the living room all he wants to do is lead you to the front door and get you to his car to take you home and just bask in your presence. 

He lingers in the sensation more, not ready to let go yet. 

«Baby» he whimpers against you when you slightly dig your teeth in his lower lip. 

«I love you» you murmur. 

And fuck, it makes him really lose it. His breath gets cut off, jaw clenching as he breathes in deeper. It’s so good when you say it, sounds so beautiful, so melodic. He can’t believe it’s for him, his ears to hear.

«Love you» you repeat, hands on his shoulder blades and nose bumping into his. He smiles with his eyes shut, cheeks staining of a faint shade of red as his mind gets filled with the need of having you close.

«Can- can you… do you want to…» he doesn’t end his sentence, he looks away from you as he munches on his lips nervously. The sudden shift of his behaviour makes you frown in confusion.

«What?» you coo. Jungkook shakes his head.

«Nothing, let’s go out?» he tries. He sees you, narrowing your eyes at him and trying to understand what he’s thinking about, lips contracted in the slightest scowl. 

«Love» you call. He shuts his eyes, the nickname still makes him uneasy with the emotions in his chest, all soft and mushy.

«Tell me» 

«I…» he licks his lips, «I want you» he murmurs, his eyes meeting yours again. Silence fills the air, his skin burns in worry and embarrassment with the new information he just let out, mind spinning to try and catch the slightest hint of discomfort in your features.

«Now? Here?» you’re taken aback, and Jungkook can hear it loud and clear, of course you would be. It would be better to just go back and wait for the pizza with the others, they’re probably looking for you at this point.

«I’m sorry, let’s just- go back and-»

«Come here» you smile, grabbing him by his hips and pulling him to you. His eyes widen, his body is totally limp as you keep him close.

«What do you want?» you huff happily. He breathes in through his teeth, chest feeling too tight and weary to hold back the maddening beating of his heart.

«Can’t you tell?» he exhales, slightly getting brave and pushing himself between your legs. His cock is half hard, you feel it against your trousers and god, does it do things to you. You wish you would be home already.

«Not really» you bluffer. He scoffs, the air coming out of his nose fans your face.

His hands grab the flesh of your thighs, his cheeks are still painted of a fair shade or red.

«Want you close» he hums. With you, it’s always like this, always the need of being closer. You fill all his senses, all the space, every inch of him until all he can do is crave and yearn and lose himself, trying to keep his mind lucid with little might. 

«We’re quite close» you smile. He whines and closes his eyes, so annoying. 

«Let’s just go back» he mumbles, skin burning and chest divided in two between giving up on his shyness and just tell you he wants to bury himself deep inside you and feel every inch of your skin and open the door to the outside world. 

«Please? I want to hear you say it» you mewl. Your tone makes his inner battle pointless, his digits dig into you.

«Wanna be inside you,» he breathes «feel you so close» 

It’s all you need to hear. Your lips touch his, soft petals parting for you without even having to ask for permission, totally giving up on his rationality. You hum in his mouth and smile against him and Jungkook feels himself growing harder already, you do things to him that make him bewildered. How you manage to get him hard just by doing nothing is a mystery that he doesn’t want to answer, not when you don’t mind at least. And you don’t seem to do so, cause your hand is cupping him through his trousers, and fuck, he gets as hard as a rock. The whine that he lets out in your mouth makes you just as desperate as he is, and when he ruts his hips against your hand you know that there’s no going back.

«Please» he begs. Your hands move fast, almost as if you didn’t have time to lose, cause you really don’t have it. Unbuckling his belt and then opening the button and the fly of his jeans, he watches you as your attention shifts on the garment, your lips pouty and focused and eyes fixed on your task, he really believes that he might die just from the sight of you. So beautiful, so pretty, so his. Fucking his. The thought makes him bite his lips harshly, hips stuttering against your hands. You hum a soft titter, let your eyes travel to his.

«Give me a second» you smile, pecking his lips sweetly. He nods with his mind empty, totally entranced by the feeling of your fingers linking around the band of his boxers and pushing the fabric down with his jeans, the cloths follow the curve of his hips without you even having to focus on it too much. They stay midway on his thighs and he’s already grabbing you by the back of your thighs, carefully raising you on the counter.

«Take ‘em off» he huffs. His strength makes you quiver as you unbutton your sailor pants, your heels tracing the back of his legs as you move. He holds back a moan when your hand bumps against his cockhead while you lower your zip, puts you back on the counter after you lower them a bit on your back, the position too uncomfortable to take them off. He helps you lower them on your thighs until they eventually fall on your ankles, the wide cut leg not helpful at all. And god have mercy, fuck, when he sees your panties the grunt that comes out of his throat makes you shiver, the red lace unbearable to his sanity. 

«Shit, I love them» he breathes. Your snort makes him giggle lightly and his eyes move from them to your face and then back to the material between your thighs.

«Really?» you coo. He nods fervently, lets his hand slide between your legs to cup your core from your panties, hissing through his teeth at the contact.

«Fuck, yes. I love them. I love you, you’re perfect» his sentences are rushed, he sounds almost childish before he kisses you with need, his lips against you as his other limb comes to the side of you to balance his weight while he slightly pushes you backwards. 

«Mine, mine. All mine» he wheezes. There’s the glittery glow of a feeling inside you that squeezes its presence around your clenching heart, heavy but fluttering it makes you nod with all your belief as you feel his fingers push your panties to the side. His thumb brushes against your clit and all you can do is bite your lips and try as much as you can not to moan, your arms wrapping behind his neck. Jungkook smiles, kisses you more. 

«Want you, please» you beg. He wouldn’t decline you even in another life and his cock is too hard to even think about it, it’s twitching and leaking precum and all he wants to do is mix it with your juices and make you feel good, feel you close and wrapped around him.

«Please, inside»

«Open your legs a bit» he instructs, eyes soft as he watches you do so. He lays his forehead against yours, holds his cock from the base as he pushes himself between your thighs and guides it to your entrance. His cockhead slides between your pussy lips and he can’t hold back, moans out loud and throws his head back at your softness, your juices covering him. Every time, every fucking time you make him feel helpless. You kiss the column of his neck, lower your hands on his asscheeks, squeeze his skin in your palms. 

«We need to be quiet» you whisper. He knows. Fuck, he knows but it’s too much. He doesn’t think he can do it, you’re too perfect, too good to him. He huffs a breath and looks at you, cheeks a bit reddish.

«Sorry, feels too good» he keens. Your beam makes him smile and he gets back to his ministrations with his lips getting bitten by his teeth, eyes on your face that make you want to lose your calm as he repeats to himself that he needs to stay quiet. His cock is heavy, throbbing against you and practically begging for your walls to squeeze him tight and you can’t wait to feel him closer, feel his skin against yours and his breath rough. Even as he digs into you your eyes stay on his face, his pupils into yours. 

It’s so saccharine that you feel like all the world is made of stars, of his essence, his comfort. He fills you up so good, the stretch slightly uncomfortable but always so ravishing inside you, you can feel every movement, every throb of him and your walls are so eager that they instantly tighten around him and his brain shuts down.

«Baby, if you do that- I don’t think I… shit, too good» he mewls. You take off one of  your heels with the help of the tip of your other shoe, the right one following right after. Your pants slip totally down now without the support of the shoes holding their cloth from underneath, they land in front of Jungkook’s feet and you dig your calves in the back of his legs, too eager to have him closer, your arms on his back make his chest weigh over yours until he’s as linked to you as he can, breasts pressing against him.

«God, shit. I love you» the way he blurts it out makes your breath halt, your heart flutters and shakes at the same time. He watches your lips turning into a beam, your neediness reaching peaks you didn’t think were possible. 

He moves inside you, his waist ruts against yours in little movements almost as if to part from the warmth you’re providing him would be a crime, his arms holding you up from behind your back and your shoulder blade. The position is new, the pleasure skyrocketing in such little time that the both of you are panting in quiet breaths in a matter of seconds. Having him so close supporting you as he moves slowly, his eyes on your face as you moan silently, his breath  uneven, the pleasure taking over his features, it feels like safeness. Like a shelter from the world, a new pot to grow your roots in, to bloom flowers and plant new seeds, protected and shielded by his arms and the way his fingers dig into your skin and write silent promises that only you and him can read.

«I love you too» you let out. Jungkook kisses you again, he pushes you more towards the edge of the sink with his hands and goes back to properly holding you up, lips brushing against you as he pushes inside you. The new found closeness makes you even more eager, your hands digging deeper into his asscheeks. 

«So good, feels so good» you whisper. 

«Yeah? Like this? You like it like this?» he puffs out. Your walls engulf him so good that he feels all of his might crumble, his breath ragged as he ruts inside you. You nod breathless, throwing your head back. 

Jungkook looks at your face from the mirror and even though he can’t see it all, it makes him ache more, longing for you even though you’re all for him already. It turns him crazy, overwhelmed every time, never enough. 

«So good, yes. I love it» you whine under your breath. The sounds are muffled, the only things hearable your breaths and the wet sounds coming from his cock filling you up and his balls slapping against your ass, moans soft and as quiet as possible. Jungkook drowns every second more into you, it can’t be stopped and all he can do is be honest with it and let your love take over him even as he pounds softly into you in the bathroom. Where you are doesn’t change it; what you’re doing, the way he loves you, how much he wishes he could melt into you and mix in every way possible. You test his limits, pull him along, ruin him in every way possible, it’s sweet and consuming and he only wants to have more, his hand warm as he cups your cheek and kisses you deeper, only for you. 

«Fuck. Are you really mine? All mine, only for me» he whispers. His words send you on the edge, walls pulsating around him, way too much pleasure filling up every nerve of your body.

«I promise. Only you, Jungkook» you dig your face in the crook of his neck, pressing your lips into his skin and trying to hold back your sounds for as much as you can. His movements make you bounce a little, the air seems to get thicker and heavier and the feeling of being so close pushes you over the edge, the thought of needing each other so desperately that you actually find yourself in this type of situation makes you dizzy and weak, so much that you contract around him and cum in spasms. Your body trembles as he whines out loud not able to hold back, his cum bursting out of his cock as his hand cups the back of your head and fumbles with your hair. The amount of cum he leaks seems to be unstoppable, so much that for a second he fears that it will spill out of you and spoil the sink even while he’s still on his high, his knees wobbly and his chest heavy as he holds you so tight that you feel the beat of his heart against yours. 

He stays silent, listens to your breaths uneven and feels the way your walls clench from time to time, his cock buried inside you still half hard. Jungkook doesn’t know what to do with himself and what he’s feeling, these emotions are too much to handle, but all he knows is that the closer he gets the closer he wants to be. So he keeps you close, just like he always did for all these years but with a new intimacy in which you both linger in, totally fragile and exposed for each other. Only when his fingers trace the back of your neck you realise that your cheeks are stained with tears, eyes burning as you open them again. 

You love him, you wish there was a better word to describe it but it hasn’t been invented yet, you think there will never be one strong and heavy enough to describe what you feel for this man, your best friend and finally, your lover. You love him so deeply and without conjectures and presumptions, you love him behind words, behind actions, you just love him. So much that it’s hard to control it, you wonder how the hell didn’t you notice, how couldn’t you realise that for all these years this was already there. How is it possible, to be so blind? To have love in your pot, soul, water, roots intertwined and feel support deep in every single part of your leaves but not realise that it’s just because there’s him keeping you up with his.

«Baby» he calls, his hand strokes your back as you sniff, your nose digs into the skin of his neck. Panic takes over him, heart beating loudly and fear filling up his eyes. 

«Did I- god, did I hurt you? I’m so- fuck, I didn’t notice, I’m so sor-»

«No» you shake your head slightly, your hands hugging his back tight. 

«Nothing happened, I’m sorry» you kiss his skin.

«Just feeling overwhelmed. Keep hugging me?» you snuffle. His heart throbs, arms immediately wrapping tighter around you as the fright in his chest summers down. He breathes in your scent, massages your back, kisses your shoulders and the skin of your neck he manages to reach.

«I got you» he strokes your hair.

«I always got you» he promises. The words make you inhale deeply, your chest is on the verge of exploding but the tears on your cheeks are drying. He keeps you so close that at some point you find it hard to picture you standing to leave the bathroom, craving for his warmth even though you haven’t left it yet. 

«I love you» he rustles. You nod.

«I love you too. A fucking lot» 

It makes him guffaw and it’s so hearty and free that your heart feels like it’s getting washed and made brand new only to reach a new peak in loving him, more than before. 

His chest rumbles against yours, your giggles filling up the air too. You wonder if your friends are waiting for you, asking themselves where the hell did you go, why would you vanish away like that, if they heard anything; still, it’s too good to let go yet. Even when Jungkook places his hands on your shoulders and lightly tugs you to look you in the eyes, even when he brushes a strand away from your face, even if the overwhelming feeling summered down a little, even if he smiles at you and your chest feels lighter. 

«What do you feel?» he asks. 

«Love» it’s the only thing that comes to your mind.

«I feel love, all over and all inside and it’s overwhelming but so good. I love it, I love you» you rant. His cheeks fill up, cheekbones high and eyes made of stars. 

«I feel better,» you let him know «I think we can go?»

«Let’s get cleaned up and eat, wanna cuddle when we go home» he hums. You shake your head yes, Jungkook pecks your lips but doesn’t budge when you rest your hands on his hips.

«Koo, we need to go» you smile amused. 

«Sorry, feels good being inside you» he sighs. He guides his cock out of you, takes a good look at your pussy before closing his eyes and inhaling deeply, his chest swells up and you can’t hold back your laughter.

«That good?» 

«More than you can imagine» he laughs. 

You’re about to jump down from the sink to get a tissue when he stops you by placing his hands at your sides.

«Let me do it?» he quietly chimes. You nod shyly, the action new. Of all the times you had sex, this never happened most probably because after coming down from your highs all you did was lay just a bunch of minutes on his chest, running away the seconds right after cause it was too intimate to stay more. He didn’t get the chance to bask in these moments fully, take care of you in the way he craved for, in the way he wanted. Last night too, you were too spent to even think about washing, when he woke you up at three am feeling needy it was pretty much just the same. But now, now that he gets to do it, it makes your cheeks burn. It’s so intimate and chaste and when he lowers with the paper between his fingers all you can do is look at his expression focused, his lips pouting and eyebrows cocked, his other hand resting on your thigh. The tissue dries your juices and his, he watches as the last drop of his cum leaks out from your entrance and for a moment all he wants to do is wipe it with his finger and lead it to your mouth but he restrains himself and absorbs it with the paper instead. 

«Gonna wash you clean when we get home» he hums. You shake your head, feeling slightly tipsy with him. 

«Let’s go?» you ask. He raises up, cleans himself with another tissue as best as he can and puts his boxers back in place with his jeans, he does the same with your panties and your sailor pants, helps you zip them up and close the button when you finally stand. When you put your heels back on he lays a kiss on the crown of your head and takes you by the hand, all smiley and as soft as a cloud. He doesn’t expect you to leave his hand when he opens the door of the bathroom.

«Wait a bit?» you coo. He stands still, blinks at your face taken aback. He just nods, and a second later you’re turning around the corner.

Your friends are all over the place, Hyunjoo and Yoongi laughing with Eunji, Jimin and Taehyung drinking on the sofa and apparently not a sight of the food on the table yet.

«Dinner?» you ask. Jin’s eyes widen.

«Yah! Where were you?» he exclaims, patting your shoulder. You shrug.

«Went to the bathroom, my stomach hurt»

«Oh, did you eat well at lunch?» 

You’re about to answer him but a second later your attention gets taken by your friend on the couch.

«Jungkookah!» Taehyung yells, eyes on the younger man as he strolls into the living room.

«Where have you been?»

«Bathroom» he simply mumbles. Jin’s eyes widen by your side, lips sealed shut after he licks them and tries to hide a smile. You’re two idiots, could’ve at least make up something before coming out. Nevertheless, he pretends that he didn’t hear anything.

Your cheeks burn and suddenly you want to dig a hole and hide yourself in it.

«The delivery is running late» he informs you. You don’t really know what to do with the information, especially when your eyes meet Jungkook’s and he shies away sitting on the couch and turning to Taehyung.

The ride home is short, the traffic not a burden anymore and the music filling up the car light, your window open and the soft breeze tickles your skin just in the right way. Jungkook looks at you from time to time, a beam lighting up his features. Despite the fact that he felt a little disappointed before when you let go of his hand and acted like nothing happened between you at all for the whole time you were at your friends’ place, he doesn’t talk about it. It’s all new, fresh and you both need time to adjust to each other, he guesses. Especially with other people around. It was enough when you talked in the bathroom before. He just hopes that he will get the chance to show you affection in public too, in general. Being like you were before you faced your feelings for each other is beautiful, it makes him realise that what you have is deeper than what it seems, but he still wishes he could act like the person who loves you. 

So for now, he thinks he just wants to face what matters the most; what happens with closed doors, the things only him and you know. 

His hand caresses your thigh as he enters the parking lot, a cheeky bunny smile spreads on his lips.

«You still want to cuddle?» 

Your answer isn’t one of those that simply are made of words. No, you have to wrap your fist around his heart and make it stop beating, just to make it go crazy when it starts again. You bend over, lips smacking against his cheek loudly, the kiss one of those that usually little kids would give to their parents, playful and childish enough to turn him into a puddle. Jungkook stops the car as he’s about to park, turns around and stares you with his eyes wide open as if you had three heads. The unsettlement in his features slowly changes into realisation and then into mischief, until he huffs and decides to finish his initial ministration. He parks the car, turns down the engine, stays still and silent on his seat. Just as you’re about to open the car door, he squeezes your cheeks with his hand and smacks his lips on yours, his thumb and the rest of his fingers dig into your skin as he keeps his mouth on yours in a never ending peck. At some point your cheeks hurt with his hold and the smile trying to take over your features, until he finally lets go and breathes out the biggest “mwah” you’ve ever heard. You snort at him, make your way out of the car as he stares at you. There are just some things that never change, he thinks. 

The whole situation reminds him of when you first started to live together, that time that he was playing on his phone and you came in the way, made him lose the game just because you wanted to make ponytails with his hair, took a photo right after that still lives in your phone and told him he was cute as hell, just to leave him bewildered and alone back on the couch, still with his hair full of pinkish hair ties and his heart pounding for the compliment, the words game over on his screen perfect for describing the situation. 

«Are you coming?» you knock on his window. He wonders when will you stop looking this cute as hell, but he guesses that all he has to do is give up and fall in love with you every second more. 

Loving Jungkook comes naturally. It’s always been inside you, from the moment you met him to the moment that you realised it, in every move and action. It’s just, it’s still new. It’s fresh, and it’s weird to finally face it and bare your emotions, it’s thrilling and the rush in your veins every time you meet his eyes makes your breath stop. It’s beautiful, but it’s a bit frightening too.

You love him, god if you do. You love him with every cell of your body, you love every single fiber of him, every inch of skin, every breathtaking flaw and every curve of his soul. Getting used to it though, it’s a total different thing. He’s still your best friend, the one that you grew up with in all these years, the one that you used to tease and argue with, probably the person that you got mad with more than anyone else and the safe place that always got you in every situation, the one that reassured you when things were hard, that hugged you when some nights were too hard to bare on your own. 

And for some reason, it’s scary. Not in a dreadful way, it’s not your feelings, it’s just… you guess it’s just the whole situation. Getting to realise that now he has that space in you, that hold on your heart, that space in your life. 

«Are you going to shower?» he beams from the door, locking it shut as you take your shoes off and leave them before the stair in the entrance. You nod, feet already walking mindlessly as he does the same with his shoes. 

«Wait for me?» he mumbles, voice low and hopeful. You stop in your trucks, turning to look at him you find him munching on the inside of his lips, a habit that always made your eyes stare a bit too much. He notices, how your shoulders hang low and your eyes look away, crawling to find an escape. It makes him gulp nervously and shake his head slow. 

«Nevermind,» he breathes «I’ll shower too, do you want to- cuddle on the couch?» 

«Couch» you quietly nod. He does the same, smiling at you to let you know that don’t worry, I’ll wait if that’s what you need.

He doesn’t say it though, and he hopes that the words written in his glittery eyes are enough clear for you to catch them and make them yours. He watches you turn the corner, steps velvety on the floor and the sound of your bedroom door closing. 

He knows how upsetting it can be, to face something this big. Not upsetting in a way that makes you want to go back to where you stepped before, at least that was only for him cause he was sure as hell that you didn’t feel the same for him, but upsetting because it’s just a new space, a new realisation. So he knows, he knows that you need a bit of time cause he knows you. He knows that you adjust well in every situation, you’re pretty flexible with yourself most of the time. You adjust just good in new places, new apartments just like when you moved in together, adjust well with new people most of the time, if they’re good people. But this is something else, this is about your relationship, the shift in the air. And even though you feel attraction for each other, love deep and hard, he knows that you need to move at your pace. It was the same when you moved in, adjusting to the house itself and his presence was easy, the process of adjusting to the consequences of it a bit slower. All he can do is show you that he’s still going to be here, with his arms open wide for you and his caring eyes, just like it was before, proving that even though things changed, they really didn’t; there’s still coziness in the air, he’s still the same as before just like you. 

He showers, waits for you on the couch, makes sure that you have a bowl full of popcorns on the table and something to drink. When you come into the living room, his face lights up. You look ethereal, with your hair still a bit wet and your eyes full of sparks almost as if the shower you just had brought you back to life, even in your pyjamas you look like the most beautiful woman he ever laid his eyes on. 

«Do we have snacks?» you chime. He nods, points at the table. Your beam spurs him on, makes him feel like he just did the best thing ever. And he loves it, totally. His arms open beckoning you to him and when you launch yourself in them all he can do is laugh heartily and wrap them tightly around you. 

The night feels blissful with his arms around you, your limbs getting entangled the more time passes. You end up talking through the movie he picked, not really showing that much of interest even though it’s pretty eventful. The way he lets you lay on top of him makes you feel safe and cozy, your back against his chest and his back on the pillow of the sofa, one of his legs bent over yours and his arms keeping you warm. 

You end up falling asleep, wake up the day after in your bed, a note on your nightstand.

"You passed out from sleep last night, so I took you to bed. I didn’t know if you wanted to sleep in mine, so I figured it was better to take you to yours. I came in to say good morning but you were sleeping so cutely that I didn’t want to wake you. Aish, why are you so cute?- a laughter bursts out of your chest- I’m going to work, probably will be home around seven. I love you :D"

Good morning, you tell yourself. It’s going to be a beautiful day.

The week passes quickly, work hasn’t been too stressful beside for Monday and all you want to do tonight is come back home and just relax. At lunchtime you’re already wishing you could open the door of your house and just throw yourself on the couch with all your might, but apparently life doesn’t work that way. Your phone lights up, your father’s picture takes up all your screen and something inside you makes your senses tingle as if it was a fifth sense.

«Appa!» you call. His laughter fills up your ears.

«Oh, my baby! Are you eating well these days?» his Busan accent is thick, totally differing from yours now. It was hard to get rid of it when you came to Seoul, it was hard for Jungkook too. You smile widely, a feeling of melancholy invading your chest. 

«Yes! Actually too well, appa. I eat too much these days» you chuckle.

«How is eomma doing?»

Your father grunts: «Oh, she’s fine, always looking for something to fight me with! We argued five minutes ago but she’s singing in the kitchen as if nothing happened, I’m the only one upset» he rants.

«What went through my mind when I proposed? Aish, this woman»

His tone makes you laugh, the dynamics have always been like this in your family. Your mother is sweet, caring, but god, is she feisty. Your father is always been the calmer one, the rational one between them, saying sorry when it was needed and talking to her when she wouldn’t listen. Her personality is a lot to handle, but if you manage to find your way with her she will give you your world and even the things she doesn’t have. 

«Why did you fight?» you wonder. He huffs annoyed.

«Nothing big! I forgot the light on in the living room when I went to pee!» he laughs at the silly argument.

«She scolded me for fifteen minutes!»

«God, she’s something else» you chuckle.

Your father makes noises of agreement, hums at your words and laughs at the high note coming from the corner of the kitchen, your mother definitely isn’t a singer.

«Do you want to come for the weekend? It’s been so long since we spent some time together. I miss you» he sweetens his voice, trying to get into your heart, and here it is, what you sensed before. His invitation makes you smile and nod, even though you’re tired and craving for your couch from this morning. It’s been definitely more than three months since the last time you visited your hometown and your parents. It’s not that you don’t want to go, actually you find yourself being homesick from time to time. It’s just been pretty eventful, with everything that happened. With Jungkook, work being a pain in the ass as always. Plus, a four hours drive isn’t really that appealing, riding the train for that long neither when you know that you will be able to stay just for a little amount of time. You guess you could do that, since you really miss them and work hasn’t been that hectic this week. You have some energy to spare after having a good sleep, even for your mom’s questions. 

«Jungkook? How is he? He can come too! We can grill samgyeopsal» he exclaims excited. It’s nothing new, your father is crazy for him and your mom just shows an inch of sanity more, but it’s pretty much just the same, she hides it well. The last time that you visited together was almost eight months ago and every time you went afterwards they asked you why you didn’t bring him with you, so you guess that you could ask him.

«Oh, he’s good. He wouldn’t turn down samgyeopsal. Not in his right mind at least» you joke. 

«Ah, great! Your mom started preparing for kimjang, it’s fermenting so we’ll have kimchi too! Aigoo, I’m hungry. Yeobo!» he yells to your mother still with the phone on his ear, grimacing you part from it. 

«How much until we eat?» 

You hear your mother scolding your father and telling him to help her in the kitchen, calling him lazy ass. It makes you chuckle but silently, knowing that your father will act all lamentable.

«I’m talking to our daughter!» he yells back. 

You don’t really understand what’s happening, weird noises making their way though the microphone until your mom’s voice comes in the way.

«Aigoo, my baby! When are you coming to visit?»

«Eomma! Tomorrow I think, I’m going to call you again to let you know» you smile.

«Bring Jungkook!» she chimes. You roll your eyes.

«I’ll talk to him,» you answer «where is dad?»

«Oh, I kicked him in the ass. He has to get up and help me, he’s always sitting on the sofa» she wails.

«I will go cooking, but come tomorrow okay?» 

«Yes, eomma» you make sure to nod even though she can’t see you. She says her goodbyes and a second later the call is over, you already picture your dad’s face with a scowl as she looks at him with his phone in her hands. 

The air in Busan feels different, more fresh and fragrant, the pollution level is lower and the fine dust is less, so you breathe in and gladly take off your mask. Jungkook stands behind you with his still on his face and a beanie on his head, entirely dressed in black. His hair are getting longer and you can’t help but swoon over him a bit. 

When you told him your parents invited you home yesterday, his eyes lit up and he asked to come before you could even tell him they invited him, so it’s to no use to say that when you mentioned samgyeopsal all he did was fist the air and hum already licking his lips. Sometimes you wonder if he likes you more than meat, but you guess that he does, otherwise he would be running inside your parents’ house already at the smell coming out from the open windows.

«Aigoo, they started grilling already» he whines. 

«I told them we were about to arrive» you hum. His arm comes around your shoulder, the wide bag he brought hanging from the other side of his body. Jungkook feels happy. He loves your parents just the same as they love him, calls them mom and dad, receives their calls from time to time, when you still used to live in Busan and he would come to your place to hang out he used to have long talks with your dad and laugh about silly things. He feels joyful, ready to spend a good weekend and to enjoy the hometown that he missed so much. His family is in Japan at the moment so it’s crystal clear that your father will keep him occupied for the whole weekend, more than happy to do so. He wondered if he should be sleeping in his parent’s house yesterday but when you answered him no as if it was obvious he felt even more cheerful. You wouldn’t say that your parents are wealthy because they aren’t, but the house is big and has four bedrooms, the price was extremely low when they bought it, plus he used to sleep here practically two to three times a week when you were younger, you know that your parents don’t mind it at all. 

«My baby!» your dad’s face peeks out of the window and he yells from the kitchen with his eyes full of excitement. A bunch of seconds later he’s opening the front door and running towards you.

«Aigoo, my daughter is here!» 

«Appa, don’t scream!» you laugh as he engulfs you in one of his bear hugs. Jungkook lets go of his hold on you and watches the scene in front of him, a new wave of happiness invading his body. He bows politely to your father when he parts from you, the older man laughing at him and  wrapping his arms tightly around his figure. He stays there, with his face on his shoulder and his hand on his back, gladly taking his affection and hugging him back, eyes sparkly and cheeks full.

«I want a hug too!» your mother comes out, hair disheveled and a kitchen apron covering her cloths. She runs to you with all her speed, for a second you fear that she’ll stumble and fall over but her body is still strong and she’s still the baddest of the baddest. She pulls you to her and you feel at home, suddenly relaxed. She might be the most annoying person on the planet, but she’s the person that loves you more too. 

You guess that after you comes Jungkook, cause as soon as she hears his laughter she pats his shoulder and pulls him to her with you still in her arms, your dad having to let go of him, she squeezes the both of you and kisses both of your heads.

«Aigoo, I missed my babies so much» she wails. Jungkook snorts and let’s her do her thing, his eyes meeting yours as he smiles tenderly.

«How are your parents? Your mother called me yesterday, Japan must be fun!»

«Oh, they’re having fun» he giggles.

When you go in you don’t spend time in strolling around and place your bags in your room. The forniture is still the same, the space not that big but not small either, a poster of your favorite girl group when you were younger on the door of your wardrobe. Jungkook stops in front of the door with his bag hanging down from his hip, takes a look around with a dreamy smile on his lips.

«I missed here so much» he munches on the inside of his cheek.

«How are you feeling?» 

His hand reaches your shoulder, he squeezes it as he stands by your side.

«Good,» you hum «happy»

He doesn’t expect you to do anything, but when you wrap your arms around his waist and look at him from down his happiness reaches its peak and he finds himself spiraling.

«Are you?» 

Fuck, yes he is. A lot, a fucking lot. He missed his hometown, missed your parents, missed the warmth of the air, missed your memories together. To be here, when your relationship took such a turn makes him look back to everything, from the moment he met you and laid his eyes on you to where you are now, when you moved in together, when you used to spend your afternoons in your bedroom just because you wanted to hang out with each other, when you used to sing your hearts out to his favorite songs, every time you would end up staying up until three in the morning watching animations, all the crazy things you did together and the softest ones too. 

«Do you remember when I came in from the window cause your parents were sleeping?» he laughs already at the thought.

«You’re so dumb, woke ‘em up anyway» you shake your head.

«They even got mad. They said it looked like you were trying to rob the house»

«Your dad got mad. He probably thought we were going to sleep together» 

«It doesn’t make sense, you were here every day» you chuckle.

«They never let me sleep in your room at night» he mumbles smiley. 

«It would’ve happened anyway if that was the case» you squeeze his hip.

«Isn’t it?» he faces you with a cheeky grin.

«It wasn’t,» you shake your head and poke your tongue out at him «and we’re not just sleeping together»

«We aren’t,» he smiles more «you love me» he huffs with his eyes in a haze. The feeling you see in them it’s perfectly clear and it’s the same that makes you soften your stance.

«Tell me» he hums, voice velvety.

You seal your lips shut just to tease him and he thumps his foot on the floor, eyebrows furrowing and lips pushed forward in a pout. 

«Please?»

«I love you» 

«You- oh?» he really didn’t expect for you to give up so easily. 

«I do,» you smack his ass «now get your bags here» 

«Oh?» he doesn’t know if he should be teasing you for the way your hands still lingers on his ass or ask you what you’re talking about.

«Your bags,» you puff out «you left the other one in the car»

«Yes- yes, here like- here? In your room?» 

«If you want to?» you smile.

«Do I- like, sleep here? With you?» he asks.

This week you didn’t sleep together, he gave you the space you needed to get used to the new situation, you cuddled in his bed more than once, stayed on the couch until late, but you didn’t spend the night in his bed and neither did he in yours. 

«If you want it too» you mumble. He blinks, face empty. And then he beams, his bunny teeth showing and punching you right in the guts. 

«But- your parents» he murmurs. He doesn’t know if he should bring this up to remind you that you’re not home or if it would be better to just stay silent and play coy.

«They don’t need to know» you hug him tighter, cheek pressed to his hard chest and eyes on him, looking like the cutest being that ever walked on Earth. If looks could kill, god, this would be around one of his thousandths of lives.

«I want to sleep with you, for tonight» you plead.

Jungkook pucks his lips.

«I’ll get the bag» he peals, eyebrows up and jaw cocked up, looking satisfied and so endearingly exuberant.

Samgyeopsal is life, that’s one of the few things that both you and Jungkook agree on. Especially when it’s soft and almost melts in your mouth, still hot and accompanied by kimchi and wrapped in a leaf of lettuce. It makes the man beside you moan and close his eyes, pretty much the same as your reaction as you dip another piece into the sauce. 

«Are you feeding my daughter? She looks skinnier» your dad munches on his food, cheeks full and eyes on Jungkook. 

«Appa, I’m eating well, don’t worry» you shake your head.

«And I’m able to feed myself on my own»

The man snorts at your attitude, your mom nodding.

«I know, but it’s nice to know that there’s someone who takes care of you» 

Jungkook shifts in his seat, his smile stretching. 

«I take good care of her» he nods proudly. 

«We ate bibimbap yesterday» 

«I cooked that» you chip in, chopstick pointing at him. 

«I helped you,» he scoffs «and I make sure you have food when you come home later than me» 

«He does,» you nod «don’t worry» you look at your dad. The man gulps down, his eyes move from Jungkook’s to yours and he tilts his head slightly, a second later he’s eating again.

«Are you going out for dinner? Or do you want me to cook something in particular?» your mom butts in as she grabs another piece of meat and puts it in your dish.

«Oh, we don’t know yet,» you look at Jungkook «do you want to go out?»

«Do you?» he asks back.

«Not really»

«We can help her cook then» he tilts his head towards the woman sitting in front of you. She scoffs, grabbing the meat and wrapping it in the lettuce, her hand directed to Jungkook’s face. He stays still with his eyebrows cooked and his eyes a little bigger than usual, tongue between his teeth and lips closed.

«Open up» she orders. 

«Eomma!» you scold. The woman snorts through her teeth, the sound guttural and lamenting.

«I used to feed him when he was younger, can’t I do it now?»  she wails.

«Yah, you’re really something. Leave him alone!» your father lightly smacks her forearm and her eyes shoot bullets to his face.

«I-» Jungkook isn’t even able to start his sentence, your mom bickers back to your father.

«I’m just feeding him!» 

«Should I come in in a bit?» Jungkook whispers at your ear as you’re about to leave the living room. Your parents are happily playing cards on the carpet, no silly little squabble in sight until now, the air is light and the sky is dark. You guess that yes, it would be better, so you nod at him. He fights the urge to kiss your cheek, just smiles at you as you get up from the couch.

«I’m feeling sleepy, I think I’ll go to bed» you announce. Your mother hums at you, lifting her hand in the air in a muted request to wait as she chooses her next move with the cards. Your father looks at Jungkook.

«Do you want to play?» he asks. The man on the sofa declines quietly, a polite smile on his face. 

«I’m a bit tired too, actually» he clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. 

«I’ll pass for tonight. Tomorrow?»

Your mom puts her card down, your father’s face lights up as he throws his card on the table.

«I won!» he cheers as he laughs at your mother’s face. She snorts and let’s her head fall backwards, her mouth shut.

«I’m going to win tomorrow too, get ready Jungkook!» 

«We’ll see» he titters. 

«Eomma, I’m going» you remind her. The woman gets up with her face still annoyed by your dad’s victory, she stumbles on her legs as she’s been sitting on the ground for almost three hours now, wrapping her arms around you and kissing your cheek. Jungkook feels his chest swell up with happiness, the feeling bittersweet. The scene reminds him of your younger selves, your parents saying goodbye when you left for Seoul. 

«Sleep well» she chimes, patting you on your back. Your father comes too, gives you a peck on the crown of your head.

«See you tomorrow» he smiles. You wait for them to part from you before you make your way out of the living room, Jungkook’s eyes following you out of the corner. 

He waits for you to close the door of your bedroom, gets himself a glass of water, watches your parents start another round with their game, listens to your father’s story about that time that a taxi driver stole him 20,000 won. Then, he decides to stand up. 

«I’ll go too» he says. Your father nods, gets up again to pat his shoulder.

«I’ll kick your ass tomorrow» he promises. The bunny smile on Jungkook’s lips makes him pinch his cheek as he always did when he was younger, endeared by his cuteness even though he’s a full grown up man now, then goes back to his sit.

«Sleep well» your mom wishes. He nods and waves goodbye.

The path to your bedroom is silent, it only lasts a bunch of seconds but by the time he knocks at your door he’s all smiley and excited in a way that makes his heart flutter with peace and happiness. You tell him to come in, voice muffled. The handle lowers and his eyes peek into the dark room, the light on your nightstand the only thing keeping the ambience clear at least a bit, your lashes flutter from under the sheets and all he wants to do is throw himself into your bed and dive into your arms until tomorrow comes. 

«You’re sleepy for real?» he giggles. You watch him get closer and stand by the bed, he stares down at you and you reach your arms out to him. His smile is contagious, a harmonious laughter erupting from his chest as he kneels by the side of the bed, figure bent over to hide into the softness of the sheets and your arms around him. 

«I have to wash,» he keens «will you wait up? Don’t wanna sleep so soon when I’m in bed with you» he mumbles against you. You let out a content sigh.

«Go shower,» you smack his ass lightly «I’ll wait up. Be fast, please?» 

He pecks your lips quickly, his excitement throbbing out of every pore of his body. The gesture surprises you, your lips were far from his for the whole day even though you spent all the time together, so you feel a little love drunk.

«Thank you» 

He low-spiritedly parts from you, getting back on his feet and strolling out of your bedroom to go and take a shower.

When he comes back ten minutes later his hair are a little dump, his skin glowing by the nightlight and you find your breath getting stuck in your chest. You lift the sheets, invite him in without saying a word. Jungkook lays on his side, looks at you silently as if you were the most beautiful star painting the sky tonight. 

«How are you feeling?» he lowly asks. You dig your head deeper into your pillow.

«Good, I told you» you hum, getting closer to the warmth of his body. His heart sinks in his rib cage, arms hitching to hold you just as you wrap yours around his torso. Jungkook takes in the way you smell, how the perfume of your body wash is so sweet but not too strong, the way your hair seem to dance on your pillow cause the reflection of the light changes when he shifts to get closer to you. 

«I feel good too» he sighs happily.

«It feels so good to be here like this» his fingertips trace the curve of your hip, tickling your skin and making you shiver just the slightest. You hide your face in his chest.

«Did you miss it a lot?» you question.

«Sometimes,» he shrugs «we have a lot of memories here»

«We do,» you nod, look at him when one of them strikes through your mind «do you remember when you tried to prank me? You scared the shit out of me»

His laughter is so loud that you’re afraid he’s going to be heard by your parents, head falling back on the pillow and eyes shut.

«That was so funny. The face you made when you realised it was me, I-»

«I swear if you ever do that again I’m going to punch you» you shake your head, but the memory is sweet inside you. 

You were tired, worn out from your first days at your first job, sad cause you felt like you didn’t measure up. The dumbass decided to help you with your mood but apparently he and Jimin where too into it and didn’t think about the consequences of their actions. They came in before you thanks to your parents loving Jungkook way too much and waited for you in your bedroom with the lights off for almost thirty minutes. Jimin ended up falling asleep on the bed and Jungkook decided that it was funny enough to steal the gochujang from your kitchen and soul up Jimin’s shirt with it. When you came in Jungkook was sitting behind the door, a very Jungkook thing to do, and when you turned on the light you screamed so loud that your throat was sore the next day, scared to death of the red stain on your friend’s shirt. Jimin woke up, jumped on the bed, Jungkook reveling his presence only in that moment when his laughter was too much to contain. The moment in which you though you had a dead body on your bed transformed into arguing in a matter of seconds, and when you realised that Jimin wasn’t part of it you ended up getting mad at Jungkook, until you realised that he drew a penis on his forehead with the gochujang sauce. You have no freaking idea of how he did that, but somehow it was still there on his forehead and he didn’t know. 

«Some things work only once,» he laughs harder «Jimin’s face was so fucking hilarious the whole time»

«When he realised it got even worse» you can still picture it clearly, how he opened the camera of his phone and widened his eyes just to start laughing with you, his finger coming right up on his skin to get a taste of the sauce. Your Kook shakes his head, kisses your forehead.

«You pranked me too» he murmurs.

«My pranks weren’t that dreadful» 

«No, cause you preferred sticking notes to my ass» he snorts.

«I only did that once,» you raise your forefinger to his face to show him «and it was one note»

«I walked around the school with it» he whines. Citing what your sixteen years old version of you wrote; “I have a cute bum, now stop looking, thanks :D”. 

«I know baby, I’m sorry. It was so funny though» 

The warmth of his body makes you shrink into the mattress. Your eyes close while you dwell into it, the soft pads of his fingers stroking your back, his even breath, the sound of his voice when he speaks, the melody of your heart beating peacefully and steady. Jungkook notices the way your eyelashes flutter, the way you let yourself smile and hug him tighter. 

«Baby» he hums. Silence fills the air for a moment or so, you wait for him to speak but shift in his hold, face looking up at his. He’s smiling tenderly, a little dimple on his cheek accompanies his lopsided beam.

«How are you feeling? Like- I know that you’re happy, but I mean- how? With us?» 

The question makes you stare at him for a bit too much. Your thoughts intertwine and your lips crave for his to make sure that the answer is totally clear, but instead you squeeze him tighter.

«What do you mean?» 

Jungkook caresses your cheek as he speaks, his voice a bit raspy: «It can be hard- to fit into this… new thing? Like, getting to what we had before to this» 

«I’m doing fine,» you smile «sometimes it’s odd, not in a bad way though. It’s just, I feel overwhelmed and… it’s weird to get to have you in this way cause it wasn’t like this for all these years. But I love you» 

Kook munches on his lips, big doe eyes diving in yours as he takes in your answer, the roundness of his cheeks distracts you just for a second because you want to pinch them.

«I feel overwhelmed too,» he squeezes your side «you can’t get used to that» he beams again. It’s like he restores the light to the room, so bright and beautiful that the night sky looks like nothing compared, dazzling. 

«Please don’t get used to that,» his tone is pleading «it’s beautiful and I love it when you feel like that. Makes me feel so loved and I just want to wrap my arms around you and never let go»

Your heart throbs, and you think that you couldn’t even if you tried with all your might. It’s just him, his light, his night skies, his bunny teeth, his big shoulders, the way his skin feels on top of yours, how he has a hold on you that could never stop swivelling, his soul. It’s everything about him and nothing at all that makes you love him with every part of you and even though it’s new and sometimes you don’t know how to face it, it’s him and him and him only that you crave for deep at night, his arms around you and his cute lips when he speaks.

«I’m not trying to get used to that,» you hide your face into his neck, taking in the fragrance of his body wash and how sweet it is «I’m just- I’m getting used to being more, not your best friend» 

Your words make him  pout. He guides his fingers to you, raises your chin and his pupils stare deep into yours.

«You’re still my best friend» he mumbles.

«You will always be, but what we have now…» 

«I know» there’s no need for him to explain. 

«Of course I am. But there’s this too and sometimes I don’t know how to handle it»

Jungkook nods. He loves what you’re doing, how you’re communicating to him, the atmosphere of intimacy in the air. He lets go of you to prop up on his forearm, his hand supporting his face as he stares back down at your eyes, you let yourself lay on your back limp under his sight. His fingers caress the curve of your hip and Jungkook swears that not other woman in his entire lifetime as ever made him this weak, not just physically, emotionally too; so bare, so frail, so vulnerable and ready to take it all at the same time.

«Do you think that it’s going better?» he whispers, totally devoted. You shrink more into the mattress, his eyes feel like reassuring you more than looking for an answer.

«I think it is,» you nod «just slightly» 

He brushes his nose against yours, kissing the tip afterwards.

«Can I do something? Like- to help you?» he stumbles on his words. It’s weird cause a part of him just wishes you could let go and take all he has to give, everything and more and just bask in it, but he knows you. He knows that you have to find your new balance before taking it, he‘s aware that what will come after will be even more hard to handle, for him especially… cause once you’ll find your space he will lose his mind with how much every part of you belongs to him, how much of yourself you’ll give without taking back. It’s always been like this, it was the same even at the beginning of your friendship.

«No, just-» you lick your lips «just sleep with me tonight? I want you close» 

He can’t hold back from kissing your forehead, kiss the vulnerability in your voice away. His fist lifts the covers as he looks at you and smiles, a strand of hair comes in the way of his eyes.

«Come here» he whispers, moving his other hand to pull you closer from your hip. You take in a deep breath, dawdle in the feeling of his fingers as he wraps his arm around you like a few minutes ago, keeps you close until there’s no space left. 

He watches your side profile, admires the curve of your nose and the length of your lashes, the pillowy swell of your lips until he lets himself down on the cushion and his other arm comes around you too, his face in the crook of your neck and his breath on your skin. He hides from the world and just focuses on you, makes sure you feel how much he loves you, how much of him is yours. The soft pecks he lays on your neck make your lashes flutter and you push yourself more to his chest, your shoulder digging into his pecs slightly. He raises swiftly from the mattress, pecks your cheek.

«Open your arm?»

You do as he asks, stretching your arm out and waiting for him to lay down again, when he does you cup the back of his neck with it. Jungkook hums happily, decides to lay on your chest. Your breasts are the perfect pillow and the sound of your heartbeat the most beautiful lullaby, and when he hears it beat louder his smile grows even more. You like it, having him laying on you in this way. It’s sweet, caring, it makes you feel like you’re the one who’s giving love and protection to him, shelter from the world even though you both know that there’s not an ending part that isn’t receiving and giving. Your arm wraps around his back, Jungkook snuggles into you and kisses your clavicle, his leg comes over yours to intertwine them and his fingers caress your stomach as he closes his eyes.

It’s odd, how waking up next to him makes your mood shift from happy to helplessly in love to horny as hell. This man, fuck the things he does to you. You think that it’s not even possible to feel this attracted to someone, scientifically. And this time it’s not your period, hell no, you know it for sure. It’s just Jungkook and his fucking body and the way you love him so desperately. His tattoos coming out from the short sleeve of his shirt, the colours mixing with his skin to create the most breathtaking piece of art, the contrast with the other pale arm wrapped around you. At some point tonight he slipped it under your back and you feel sorry for him when he’s going to wake up because it will most probably be sore after having you on top of it for all this time. He’s still sleeping on your chest, snoring lightly from time to time with his lips coming out and the roundness of his cheeks overwhelming, squashed against you, his hair all over the place.

It’s just, you don’t know what it is, but opening your eyes to him first thing in the morning makes your fingers tingle to touch every inch of him. His broad shoulders make you salivate just at the sight. You shift slowly, trying your best to get out from under him without waking him up but his face is peacefully laying on your chest and of course, he would open his eyes at the movement. Jungkook groans and opens and closes his lips a few times, gulping down the saliva he stored in his mouth while sleeping, vision blurry as he moves and tries to take a look at you. Your eyes are already on him, the light in the room is still dim but he’s not used to it and it’s too bright for his sleepy body. All he can do is narrow his eyes, or close them almost, your face hazy but still so pretty. 

«What time is it?» he mumbles. His voice is low and raspy and somehow it makes you yearn even more.

You take a look at your phone by the nightstand. 

«Seven and ten» 

He whines and hides his face back on your chest, nose digging in the hill of your breast. You shift under him, his arms wrap tighter around you and suddenly your legs are opening and you’re pushing your hips against his thigh. Jungkook’s eyes open, puffy and still sleepy but definitely interested in your current mood.

«What was that?» he grins, first thing in the morning. You don’t know what’s gotten into you, your cheeks burn but all you really want to say is just, fuck it. Instead, you just look away. He scoffs and decides to level himself on his forearm by your side, squeezes your cheeks between his thumb and his fingers to gain your attention.

«Love» he calls. Your heart makes a somersault, your breath stops coming out. 

You whine under him for the hold he has on you with just a single word, his smile grows bigger. 

«What was that?» he asks again, voice soft and airy, a little amused.

«Nothing» you mumble. Jungkook shakes his head, he lays his face back on your body, this time in the crook of your neck. A sweet kiss, his breath on your skin, his eyelashes fluttering against you, his fingers squeezing your hip. 

«Good morning» he mumbles happy. 

«Fuck it,» you huff out «Kook, I’m-» it’s so embarrassing to say out loud «I’m feeling horny»

Jungkook breaks out in a giggle, so soft and cute that you want to hide from the world and listen to it forever, the contrast too deep with what you just revealed. He kisses your neck again but his lips are stretched and they don’t quite connect too well with your skin.

«Horny?» he echoes.

«Don’t make me say it again,» you whine «it’s so embarrassing»

«It’s not,» he sweetly caresses your hair «why?»

«It’s just… don’t know, I’m not used to tell you this type of stuff» he watches as you stare at the wall and try as best as you can not to look at him. He pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue, his thigh slowly moves back to where it was and when you feel the muscle slightly push against you you wish you could just combust.

«Get used to it,» he mutters with a big beam stretching on his face «cause I love hearing it» 

«It’s embarrassing» you mewl and cover your eyes with your hand. Jungkook shakes his head, lowers his lips to the side of your ear.

«It’s sexy,» he breathes «did I do that? Did I turn you on?» 

Just the thought makes his cock hard in his boxers. 

«You-» you gulp «yes» 

«Did I? What did I do?» he licks his lips, your hand moves away and your scoop the confidence to look at him just to find him gazing at you already.

«Nothing, just… you» you whisper cause you’re not sure that your voice is going to work right now. You see his shoulder swell as he breathes in deep, telling himself to just don’t lose his mind, the way you make him feel is just… fuck, there’s no word to describe it. 

«Just me?» he smiles, amused. Your little nod makes him clench his jaw. A second later, his lips kiss yours and it’s so fucking sweet and consuming and intimate, sexy at the same time that your body loses its hold on the world and your arms wrap around his neck. You whine on his mouth, his tongue slides inside and all you can do is surrender and let go, give up and let him consume every still working neuron in your brain.

«Do you… want to do something about it?» he hums. You can’t discern if he’s teasing you or if it’s your mind playing tricks on your embarrassment.

«Don’t tease me» you huff. He kisses your chin.

«I’m not. Not in a bad way at least,» he smiles «I’m just- the thought makes me hard» he breathes. You gulp down harshly at the information.

«Can I take care of you? Just- if you don’t want to-»

«Please, do it» your sigh cuts him off. Jungkook raises his eyebrows, stares at you to make sure that you really mean it. The last time you had sex was a week ago, at Taehyung’s house. You needed space to get used to this, even though you didn’t actually say it he understood it perfectly, and he just wants to make sure that you really mean what you’re saying.

«Are you sure?» he hums. You nod surely, squeeze his hip to make sure he understands.

«Really sure?»

«Sure, Jungkook» you dig your head into the pillow.

«Why?»

«It’s just- I want to make sure that you’re comfortable and don’t feel pressured or… I don’t know. I love you, just. Don’t wanna do something that might-»

«Love, yes. Kook, I want you to take care of me. Please? When I woke up, I don’t know… you where wrapped around me and all I could- all I craved for was your touch. I want this, please?» 

His eyes light up. Not because you just told him that you want him, but because you’re showing your vulnerability just for him, your needs, your yearning, your voice is needy and it’s for him to care for and to take care of, for him to respect and adore, worship. And he can’t wait to make you feel good, give you what you want and see you in your bare state. So he kisses you, another time. Deep and sweet, something that says I will take care of you no matter what.

And he does just that, his fingers caress every inch of your skin as they travel down your stomach, he admires the softness and the warmth of you, takes in the way you shiver for him when he reaches your hips, lays little kisses and pecks on every inch of you he manages to grasp, his hair tickle your skin and they make you shrink and shift under him, too excited to stay still. 

The covers get pulled down, he takes them with him as he takes his seat between your legs, bum on his calves and eyes back on your face. The smile he forges stops all your thoughts and suddenly you sit up and cup his cheeks in your hands and kiss him so deep that he moans in your mouth, needy and surprised at the same time.

«I know that I’m- I’m slow and it takes time. I’m sorry. I just- I love you so fucking much, I wanna do things right. In the right way. Wanna love you with every part of me and every second of the day, I just need to get used to the new version of us, but fuck, I love it» you rant against him. Jungkook feels drunk, he’s afraid he’s going to fall and fall and fall and never hit the ground cause for god’s sake, the way you love him kills him in such a sweet way that he never wants to experience the way it would feel without it, ever again. It’s addicting, the worst of drugs, the deepest of falls, the most saccharine of candies.

«Don’t say sorry,» he whispers and pecks your lips «I love you. I love you and I want you to feel comfortable in everything you do. I love having you like this, but it’s something that means more. It’s not just feeling horny,» he strokes your cheek lovingly. He hopes that all of his emotions are clear to your eyes as he cups your cheeks and brings you closer to his face again.

«It’s showing it to me. Opening up and knowing that I won’t judge and just stay with you. For whatever, baby. It’s us, like it’s always been. You can show me all of yourself and fuck, I’ll be worshipping every ridge, every fucking shade. Just, let me love you right»

You never felt so fucking entangled with someone. Never. But with Jungkook, your souls are entangled, your limbs, your minds, your fucking hearts, your scents, the way you breathe. Everything melts into the other, every part of his was made to be yours and it was the same for you, cause otherwise it wouldn’t make sense. The way you feel the safest you’ve ever been wouldn’t, the way his fingers tremble slightly before they reach the hem of your shirt to push it upwards, the sound of your maddening heart wouldn’t. It doesn’t beat like it would with your first crush, with the last guy you dated, when you take care of yourself on your own. It beats in a way that you feel it deep in your intestine, in your guts, in every place. It beats sweetly, like a melody, it beats like you’re losing yourself but know that even if you don’t have control over you, his soul is going to keep you protected, loved and cared for. 

«Lay down for me?» he whispers. You smile and watch him as you rest on the mattress, he lowers himself and lays down on his chest, his feet hanging out of the bed. 

Jungkook hums in front of your core, the shirt you’re wearing is pretty big and long so you didn’t wear the rest of your home made pyjama yesterday night. He hooks his fingers around the band of your panties and you raise your hips up to make it easier for him to remove the garment. He lets it caress your skin, takes it off slowly, without any pressure. His eyes take in every inch of your skin, his digits caress your thighs and your knees in a way that causes your chest to feel heavier as he lets your panties fall on the bed just beside you. When he goes back to your center, his mouth salivates. 

«So pretty,» he coos «I love your pussy» and a second later, he’s pushing his lips against your hole, his nose pushing on your clit. You moan out loud before you can do anything about it, his eyes close and you raise your fist to keep your mouth shut. Your parents shouldn’t hear this, at all. You’d die of embarrassment only at the thought. 

He gathers your wetness on his tongue, sucks it in his mouth as his hands come to wrap around your thighs, moans on your pussy lowly at the addicting taste. 

«So sweet» he mumbles on it. 

«Is- the door locked?» you question, you have to at least before you lose your sanity. Jungkook nods on your pussy, the movement makes his nose rub against you and you can’t help but squeeze your thighs around him, it makes him moan and slurp on your wetness even more.

«Locked it when I came in yesterday» he says, kissing your lips. 

«Relax for me,» he whispers softly «let me take care of you» 

Your hand urgently reaches his on your thigh, Jungkook smiles at you and holds it, your juices glossing his lips. 

«Tell me what you want?» 

You gulp down, it’s hard to even think straight when he looks at you from between your legs.

«Want your tongue,» you nod «please»

«Where do you want it?» the way he speaks as if he’s willing to give you anything renders you breathless.

«Inside» you breathe. He doesn’t let you ask for it twice. 

He sucks on your lips just in the right way, and a second later he’s dipping his tongue in your pussy, eyes on you as the muscle works his magic inside you. He curls it and gatherers your juices again, saves the sweetness for his hungry mouth, gulps some of it down and then enters your hole again. Your hand squeeze his, his finger rub tenderly the back of it to soothe you as he starts fucking his tongue in and out. The muscle wet, controlled, firm but soft. As he moves his face to help himself his nose rubs against your clit again and god, it’s so good. So sweet, so alluring that you can’t hold back from wrapping your legs around his neck. 

Jungkook loves it, loves you, loves your pussy so fucking much that he thinks he could come free hands just by licking it, tasting your juices on his tongue, having you like this. His cock is so fucking hard that it hurts, his balls are already tight and they make him grunt on you as he fucks you slowly, the pace always the same, the one that he knows you like. He’s too hungry for you, to feel you, to have you, to cherish and worship every part of you, every single one; every irregular breath, every shiver of pleasure. He wants it to be his, every part of you. He wants you to remember this and wants you to soak your panties with your wetness when the image of him sucking on your core flashes in your mind at work, when you’re laying in bed. He wants it all, wants you to fucking lose it and give yourself to him, wants you to trust him that much. 

«Fuck, baby-» he whimpers as he squeezes your thigh «wanna make you lose it. Want you to come so fucking hard» 

You shiver under him, the pleasure building up with the pressure on your clit makes you arch your back and dig your head in the pillow, your nerves are on fire. His tongue touches your walls perfectly, strokes them as it goes in and comes back out, the tip reaches deep inside you right where you need him and it’s ecstatic. You whimper and cover your eyes cause looking at him only makes you weaker, bite your lips to hold back any sound. And then for a second, Jungkook stops his ministrations. You don’t even have the strength to peek at him, your body limp on the bed beside from your legs still wrapped around him. 

His tongue leaves your center, his nose away from you, you whine at the loss of contact but stop when you hear him grunt, his back lifting with your legs. Your hand moves away, and when you look down and see him getting back on the mattress you get a glimpse of the head of his cock, head red and hungry, so fucking hard. He breathes in deeply and dives in back in your pussy, pressing himself on the mattress. A whimper leaves his mouth and fuck, you can’t hold it back. The thought of him rubbing himself against the mattress while he fucks his tongue inside you makes you crazy, the fact that he feels so needy that he couldn’t wait more, the way you make him so hard that drives him insane. 

«Gonna cum» you try to whisper, but you’re voice comes out in a whimper and Jungkook  roots his hips harder against the sheets.

«Cum for me? Want you to smother me with your juices,» he moans so sweet that your mind links his voice to the taste of cotton candy, so velvety and light «want your wetness all over my face, fuck- I love it, love your pussy so much. I’d do anything for it, for you baby»

His remarks bring you closer to the edge, the rush in your veins seems closer and closer to its peak, ready to fall down and hit you in the best and worst way possible. Your hand reaches his hair, you fist the strands and Jungkook pushes himself deeper into you, his jaw hurts for how much of his chin is glued to you  but he found care less, his breath keeps hitting your clit every time he parts just to dive in again. 

«Please» you plead. Jungkook keeps his eyes on you and all his eagerness quiets down for a second. The way you look makes his heart clench, the way you bite your lips and close your eyes, the colour of your cheeks flushed, how you squeeze your legs around him. Love is in every move he makes, it was until now too, fuck if it was, but stopping himself for a second or so, he feels like his heart is going to explode. Not only in a thrilling way, but for how much he loves you. For you and you only, for the soul under him and showing itself in its bare state, for you giving yourself to him completely. He kisses your core, decides that he wants to make it even better, give you more, make you feel more and better. His lips lock around your clit, it’s unexpected and all at once and suddenly you feel like you’re going to cry for the pleasure. His fingers push inside you, two of them hit your g-spot perfectly and he doesn’t take them out, just curls them inside you repeatedly, so good and breataking, his tongue flicks your clit up and down as he keeps sucking on it. He realises the pearl with a pop and opens his lips to lick stripe on it, just on the spot that makes you lose it, but his teeth graze it and suddenly you’re whimpering and shaking and fuck, you’re cuming under him, around him. His mind is full of you, you’re everywhere all at once and all he wants to do is fucking show you how much he loves you. Your legs wrap around him tighter and he strokes your hip to soothe you while you keep him tight to your pussy, body trembling.

He gulps down your wetness, cleans every drop and tastes your sweetness on his tongue, licks it clean until there’s nothing more for him, and even then his tongue comes inside you to get some more. He loves it, he’s fucking addicted to your sweetness, to your juices. Just the flavour makes his dick twitch and throb, balls too tight to hold back any longer. He knows he could cum just by having you like this, he just knows it.

«Koo» you call. He realises a deep breath on you, your thighs still shake around him for how sensitive you are.

«Let me help you» you coo. He licks his lips clean.

«I wanna-» he cuts himself off as he takes a deep breath, voice shaky «I wanna try something»

Your hand strokes his hair as you watch him speak, eyes glued to his face even though your mind is still hazy. He looks totally fucked out, almost as if the one who’s been on the receiving end until now, like you’re doing something to him that can’t be explained, take all of his energy and rush it to his cock, begging to be released. 

«What? What do you want?» you whisper. His cheeks colour of a reddish tint, eyes glittery looking away from your face, almost as if it’s too much to say out loud.

«Talk to me?»

Jungkook gives in as soon as your foot digs into his shoulder: «Wanna cum while tasting you on my tongue, I- just by tasting you» 

Shit. If that’s what your brain is assuming, oh god.

«You mean…»

«Hands free» he breathes, eyes back into yours. The words dig a hole into your skin and you swear that if your energy wasn’t so drained right now you’d make him do just that and ride his dick afterwards, give him more while he’s sensitive and whimpering until all he can do is cum and break out into his sweet mewls and sighs.  

«I can do that, I’m so close, baby. Just-»

«Do it,» you nod «do it for me?» 

He hopes that your parents are still sleeping or just busy cause he doesn’t think he can manage to keep his mouth shut. The way you look at him and take in every feature on his face makes him salivate. It’s sexy and it’s such a turn on to think that you make him this crazy that your wetness starts to pool your pussy again and you just want him  with his tongue covered in your juices again. Fuck, he wants it too. 

«Can I? For real?» 

You nod at him, free him of your legs just to sit up and raise his chin with your fingers. Jungkook stays there, with his chest on the mattress, ass naked and cock against the sheets, but the yearning he feels for your kiss in undeniable. 

«Why would I say no?» you smile.

«It’s sexy,» your lips brush against him as you speak «of course you can»

«It’s a bit embarrassing, actually» he scoffs.

«It isn’t,» you echo the words he said before to you «makes me crazy. The thought of me turning you on that much that you can- cum like that, fuck. It’s making me wet again» 

«Yeah?» he hums on your lips, looking for recognition. 

«Yes,» you peck him sweetly «yes, love. Don’t feel embarrassed. I would love it»

Damn, he loves you. He loves you. He just- he can’t even form a proper sentence, he just loves you. 

«Do it» you smile and all he can do is hiss through his teeth. He watches as you lay down again, your pussy pink and your wetness dripping to your asshole. Fuck, he can do that, he definitely can. His cock is hurting just at the sight. 

«Raise your hips a bit?» you ask. He nods as he shifts on the bed, weighting down on his knees and getting back down on you with his cock standing against his abdomen. Like this, there’s nothing that’s willing to provide him of some pressure, nothing to help himself with, and somehow it makes his cock throb even more cause he knows that you want him to cum just from you. You’re desperate for him as much as he is for you.

He breathes in loudly, closes his eyes as he tastes you again, tongue licking from your asshole to your cunt and sucking on the path where your juices dripped on. The taste is saccharine, the texture creamy, honey like. His cock throbs, twitches as he slurps them and wets his chin, your hands coming back on his hair only make him dip his tongue deep inside you. You’re too sensitive to let the pleasure take over you, but still you don’t move an inch. Jungkook moans and drinks down your juices, totally pussy drunk and in love with you. He feels his cock burn from how much blood is rushing to it, his skin sweating, his balls tightening so much that it makes him lose his mind and stand on the edge, helpless and needy to let go but too restricted by not really knowing how to. Until you push your hips to his face. You push your sweet fucking little pussy on his face and his cock just jerks, his balls suddenly loosen and he thanks the gods in his mind that his mouth his glued against you cause if it wasn’t for it, the noises he makes would probably wake up your neighbours and definitely your parents. His cum bursts out in more spurts, so harshly and so fucking much that he feels himself drained and all he can do is hide deeper into your core until it’s hard for him to breathe too, with his nose pushing against you and his high overpowering every part of him. The sheets get wet, his chest too, your asshole gets painted by a few drops and his heart flutters as he enters a world made of bliss and release, feeling your fingers on his cheeks and then on his neck, caressing it sweetly and reassuring him as he whimpers. 

He stays like that for a bunch of seconds, feels his cock throb and lingers in the afterglow of his orgasm, until all he craves for is your arms wrapped around him and your whispers in his ears. He digs his hands on the mattress, lifts himself up with a groan  and parts his face from your core, laying down on top of you as best as he can for the way he’s feeling now. You welcome him lovingly, your arms wrap around his bust and you stroke his hair as he nuzzles into the crook of your neck and gathers back his even breath, his heart pounds against your chest and it’s so overwhelming to have him in this state that you just shower him with all you can give. All the love you have, all the affirmations he needs to hear, all the thoughts that pass through your mind. You tell him how much you love him, how much you love when he lets go of himself like this, how you love to see him in this way, how he makes your heart flutter, what you’d be down to give just to make him smile. Jungkook whimpers when you stroke his back and kiss behind his ear, totally limp on your body. 

«I- I don’t wanna be- don’t wanna live without you» it’s a spur of the moment, but he feels his words rooted deep inside him, written clearly and with bold capital letters. Your heart gets squeezed in the same way that you squeeze him in your arms.

«Don’t wanna» he mumbles childishly. 

«Why are you saying that?» you coo sweetly.

«Just. Just to say it, I feel it» his words are muffled. He hides furthermore into you, arms wrapping around you and passing between your back and the mattress.

«Sometimes I think about it. Just the thought- don’t want it to ever happen» he wails.

«I’m here with you, baby» you kiss his neck, take in the warmth of his skin on your lips.

«I’ve got you. Always»

Going back home means getting back to waking up early and to rush not to be late, to spin around all day when you wish you were still laying in bed doing nothing. This Monday was extremely frustrating especially, after getting a taste of relaxing all day yesterday, coming back to work was hell. You spent your day strolling around a park with Jungkook and your parents, had lunch out in a restaurant, went shopping a little even. You came back to Seoul after dinner and when you arrived it was already late, you fell asleep like a baby and slept all night in your bed. Jungkook cuddled you until you fell asleep and then went back to his bed, not really sure about what you wanted cause you were too tired to even talk about it. When you woke up you felt a little disappointed to not feel him wrapped around you but you didn’t have the time to tell him cause you were already late for work since you didn’t wake up on time. You’re tired and sleepy and all you want to do is go back to your apartment, eat dinner and sleep.

«It’s tomorrow» Yoongi smiles. He and Taehyung came to visit you unexpectedly, but you don’t mind it at all. It’s almost time to go home anyway and your work hasn’t been too much today.

«Of course I’ll come!» you clap your hands excitedly. Hyunjoo and him decided to celebrate their pregnancy officially at Jin’s restaurant, you would never think about turning down their invitation.

«Jin will cook» Taehyung nods as he wraps his arm around your shoulder.

«He said he’ll make something really good»

«Yah, can’t you talk about something else? That’s not what’s important now» you scold him. Your friend raises his chin and lowers his bottom lip, a habit of him that you always found endearing and cute. You squeeze his cheek.

«Of course what’s important is the baby,» he nods «but I’m looking forward to dinner too» 

Yoongi shakes his head as he scoffs: «The restaurant will be all for us, he’ll close it for tomorrow night»

«Ah, that makes me hungrier» Taehyung rubs his belly and you push him slightly as you laugh at him. His grip on you grows as he tries not to lose his balance, chuckling loudly. 

«Will you be-»

Someone knocks on your door and you cut off your words. Yoongi goes to open it, peeks out from the wood, you expect him to bow politely at whoever it is but a second later he’s opening his arms wide and Jungkook appears in all his beautiful aura. You raise your eyebrows, you were not expecting him here at all, this morning you took your car, he didn’t need to come here to give you a ride.

«Jungkookah!» Taehyung calls out. He leaves your side to hug his younger friend, Jungkook’s eyes meet yours as he lays his head on his shoulder, definitely not understanding what’s happening in your studio. 

«Why are you here?» he asks. Yoongi hits his back lightly.

«Can’t we visit her? Why are you here?» he chuckles. Jungkook shakes his head as he parts from Taehyung.

«I came to visit too» he mumbles. He finished work earlier than usual today and he wasn’t in the mood to go back home and wait for you there, so he thought that he could’ve just stopped by and wait for you to finish, steal a kiss or two and stay silent while you worked. Apparently, that’s not going to happen. 

«You’re something else,» Yoongi laughs «you were complaining all day about work but now that you’ve finished you’re here»

Jungkook’s cheeks color of a red shade as he looks at you. He talked to Yoongi a lot today, more then usual through texts at least, and here he is revealing them all. Not that he minds, after all there’s nothing wrong in it.

«Didn’t wanna go home yet,» he chuckles «thought I could stay here while you were working but apparently there’s a party I didn’t know about» 

You scoff at his words, Taehyung gets back to your side and rubs your hair in the same way you would with a pet or a child, his ministrations make you whine as you try to stop him and laugh at the same time.

«Yah, why don’t you make me do that?» he scolds.

«I asked you sometime ago but you told me I couldn’t. Jungkook can?»

You step on his foot to make him stop messing up your hair, he opens his mouth wide at the sudden burst of anger but laughs even harder.

«He didn’t ask me» you explain. Jungkook shakes his head at the side, slightly giggling.

«Cause you make me do it sometimes» he chirps in. Taehyung closes his fists and finally stops teasing you, eyebrows furrowed and lips contracted in a scowl.

«You’re the worst! How can you do this to me?» he slightly raises his voice.

«Yah, she’s working! Stop that!» Yoongi tries to look as stern as he can but his voice breaks out in a giggle too. 

«Next time I ask you you should tell me to come» your friend pats your shoulder. 

«Since we’re here, why don’t we eat together?» he goes. Your eyes widen at the request and Taehyung pouts at your reaction.

«Hyunjoo is waiting for me» Yoongi declines, eyes on Jungkook.

«Sorry hyung, but not tonight» he mumbles with a grimace. Taehyung squeezes you to his side.

«Please?» he begs with his voice all soft and pouty. You roll your eyes, he knows well how to get to you with all the years of friendship behind you. Still, you know his ways too.

«Not tonight, Tae. I’m tired. We’ll be together tomorrow»

«But tomorrow we’re all together!» he whines.

«Something chill and calm, when we’re together it’s always chaotic»

«That’s because you’re one of those who makes it chaotic» Jungkook laughs.

«Please?» he goes on, giving a sneaky glance to his younger friend. You look at Jungkook, Taehyung squeezes you so tight that you almost feel suffocated.

«These two are the worst. Let’s do it us two. Let’s go eat sushi, it’s on me» 

Taehyung is like this. Physical and endearing, your relationship has always been on the soft side, more clingy to what it’s like with the others. You’re used to it and it’s like this for you too but one of the peaks about it is that you can never say no to him, not when he pouts and asks so nicely, because you find him just so cute and adorable and you love him a lot. It’s been a while since you spent time together too, so you know that he misses you a bit, he told you about it when he texted you at lunch. You weren’t expecting to see him with Yoongi at all when he opened the door before, weren’t expecting Yoongi either.

«I hate you» you mumble. He jumps on his feet, already knowing what your answer means, Jungkook sighs deeply and lets his head fall backwards. He wishes he could tell you that he wanted to take you home and cuddle you until you felt asleep tonight too, but he knows he can’t in front of them. So all there’s left to do is let go and shut his eyes close.

«I’ll come too» he groans.

«Yah, look at him. You’re really something else» Taehyung grins.

«Let’s go»

You ate sushi. Taehyung really missed spending time with you, when you’re together by yourselves it’s different then when people are around, more calm. He missed talking to you a lot, especially since in the last months you’ve been seeing each other twice or thrice a week but every time there’s always everyone else too, so getting to spend tonight just eating peacefully and talking to his friends feels relaxing. Beside for the fact that Jungkook had a scowl on his face for the last twenty minutes.

«What’s wrong with you?» he asks as he sips from his beer. Jungkook frowns.

«What?» he echoes. 

«You’re annoyed by something» his friend points at him. You look at the man in front of you, his eyes shift to yours immediately. 

«I’m not annoyed by anything» 

«It doesn’t seem like it» you mumble. 

Jungkook shrugs.

«I’m just tired, can’t we go home?»

«Now?» Taehyung raises his eyebrows at his friend, Jungkook munches on his lips and relaxes his shoulders.

«I’m tired» he mumbles. In fact, he doesn’t look full of energy, but not as tired as he says you guess. 

«You’re getting old» Tae points at his face. 

«Too bad for you, you’re older than me» he grins. A second later your friend scoffs at his attitude and throws his arm around you.

«What do you like about him? Why are you two best friends?» he teases. Jungkook crosses his arms on the table, he stares deep into his soul with a smirk as he waits for your answer.

«You’re friends with him too, you know» you snort.

«And sometimes I ask myself the same question»

«Oh, please» Kook shakes his head. He knows that you’re both teasing him but he hoped you would cut the chase. He wishes he could just tell Taehyung the rest of the story.

«You’re annoying,» your friend raises his forefinger «touchy,» he lifts his middle finger «too noisy,»

«You are too»

«I didn’t finish;» he narrows his eyes at him.

«I’m not touchy,» Jungkook looks at you with his pupils pleading «I’m not, am I?»

You raise your eyebrows: «A little?»

He blinks outraged, face blank and eyes wide.

«Why are you taking his side? You should be with me!» he whines. 

«I love Taehyung too much» you shrug and giggle while he scoffs at the scene. Really outraged. Tae messes up your hair for the nth time today while trying to softly caress them as he would do with a puppy, making you slap his hand away. Your eyes meet Jungkook’s just to see him breathe in deeply through his nostrils, eyes staring at you as you laugh.

«What?-» Taehyung cuts your upcoming question off.

«And you talk to yourself a lot» he adds another finger. 

Jungkook sneers at the last one, he kicks him with his foot from under the table. The man wails and bends over, hands hiding under the wood to cover the injured part.

«And did I say touchy?» he keens, receiving a death stare from the other one.

«Why? It’s true!»

«Yah, stop» you shake your head at the two, patting Taehyung’s shoulder.

«Did he really hurt you?» you try not to laugh but the whole situation just makes you want to giggle out loud. Still, you keep it silent.

«He works out too much» Taehyung blubbers, bringing his head on the table to cry silently.

«Come on, it wasn’t even a kick. You’re getting old» Jungkook huffs, but a second later his face goes from annoyed to actually worried, eyes clear and lips pouty.

«Hyung, did I hurt you for real?» he cock his eyebrows and you can see the way he munches on the inside of his cheek nervously. Taehyung sighs deeply, raising his middle finger in the air. 

«Not really» he laughs. The younger lets go of a restrained breath, his shoulders fall as relief washes over him.

«You’re the worst» he mewls. Silence fills the air until Taehyung breaks out in a chuckle, you two following. Jungkook’s cheekbones are high and he wrinkles his nose as he laughs. 

«Can we go for real?» he mumbles.

«Yah!»

There’s something bothering Jungkook that both you and him can’t quite grasp. It’s feeble and velvety but his mood is slightly off and the fact that he doesn’t know what’s making it like this is even worse. What he notices though, is that it started when he came into your office yesterday and it’s been going on until now. It’s making him huff at his desk as he tries to concentrate on the contract in front of him. He read the paper again and again until he decided that it would be better if he took a break cause his brain isn’t really listening now. He takes out his phone out, scrolls through his contacts to call Yoongi and ask him about the time you’re going to meet tonight, but a second later his phone rings and your name comes up on the screen. He clicks on the green button without even thinking about it.

«Koo» you call. He smiles at your tone, fixing his position on the chair.

«Yes?» he mumbles.

«You don’t need to come pick me up tonight» 

He narrows his eyes and pouts his lips, not really understanding. This morning he gave you a ride and took you to work, you woke up late and apparently he woke up too soon and wasn’t feeling sleepy anymore, so with the excuse of that and the thought of not seeing you for the whole day he gladly and not so easily convinced you to get into his car. He doesn’t get why now you’re telling-

«Taehyung told me he’ll pick me up,» you explain «is it okay for you?»

He wrinkles his nose, eyes staring at the wall in front of him. He knows that you’re asking because last time this happened he said that he wanted to spend some time with you together before meeting the others.

«Of course» he nods.

«What time are we meeting?»

«Aish, you never check the group chat,» you scold «Yoongi sent a message this morning, it’s at seven» 

«Too many messages,» he shakes his head

«guess I’ll see you then?»

«Of course» you smile. He’s about to close the call when he hears you call him again.

«Koo?»

He hums in response.

«Is something wrong?» you question, voice sweet. He shrugs, fills his cheeks with air just to pass it from one to the other for a few times, letting it out through his lips with a sigh.

«I don’t know,» he murmurs «I’m feeling a bit annoyed but I don’t know what it is» 

You nod on the phone, putting him on speaker to lay your head on the desk.

«Does it have to do with the ride?» 

«No, it’s not that» he shakes his head no.

«I really don’t know»

«Talk to me if there’s anything wrong,» you mumble «I’ll listen»

«I know» he beams. Hearing you say that makes him feel a bit lighter.

«I love you» your voice comes out low from the microphone and it makes him lick his lips as he smiles, reassured.

«I love you too»

Jungkook is already there when you enter the restaurant, standing by Namjoon that laughs at what Jin just said he shakes his head and throws his head back. He smiles at Joon and pats his back as he responds to Jin, Hana coming by his side to kiss his cheek just for the sake of it. He lays his hand on her hip, smiles back at her before going back to their conversation. Jungkook’s eyes instantly lay on his hand that stays still around her, his mind filling up with your face and how he wishes he could just do the same naturally, without thinking too much about it. Just a second later, he hears your voice from behind him and he spins on his heels almost hitting Namjoon in his ministrations. Fucking hell, you’re breathtaking.

Yoongi did say to dress good but not totally elegant, but this, shit this is art for the eyes. You look stunning, totally gorgeous and he thinks he’s probably drooling by now. 

You hug Yoongi and Hyunjoo, he hears you tell her how beautiful she looks, you caress her bumpy belly sweetly, but fuck he doesn’t think you realise how good you look. And to think that this morning you were running all over the place saying that you were going to change your clothes at work and that you didn’t know what you got from your wardrobe cause you were running late. 

«Jungkookah,» Namjoon pushes him with his elbow slightly «you’re giving your game away. Shut your mouth at least» 

He gulps, fixes his posture. Fuck, he wishes he could tell him that you already know, there’s no point in denying it. 

«She’s so…»

«I know,» Joon pats his shoulder «but she’s still your best friend so you should go greet her, maybe?»

His words don’t seem venomous at the beginning, he just nods to himself and strolls towards you. Taehyung is by your side and greeting the others with a big boxy smile on his face, he does the same with the maknae and decides to walk over to Namjoon a second later. Jungkook wraps his arm around your shoulder as he would do usually, squeezes you to his side until you have to pinch his nipple to let you out of his grasp. The scowl that follows on his face doesn’t go unnoticed even by Jin and Namjoon that are standing a few meters away.

«You hurt me» he keens.

«Oh, come on, I didn’t» you scoff. The light makes your skin glow, it takes his breath away. It doesn’t matter for how many years this has been going on, his heart sings always the same melody and the tempo goes by quicker when you look at him and smile.

«When did you arrive?»

«Oh, five minutes ago» he shrugs. You nod, look at the others.

«Eunji?»

«She’s on her way with Jimin» 

Taehyung comes back to you, hooks is arm around yours and beckons you to do the same with Jungkook’s before walking towards the table to make you sit between them, he almost looks like he came out of a vintage movie with his beige wide leg pants and the satisfied smile on his lips. 

The others arrive in a bunch of minutes, Eunji and Jimin with some bags hanging by his arm, Hoseok just a few moments later dressed in colourful clothes and a beanie that probably costs more than what you and Jungkook pay for your monthly rent. 

With the table full, Jin announces the beginning of the dinner and the usual chaotic atmosphere begins, everyone talking and remembering things that make you laugh and nod every ten seconds. Jungkook notices the way you look at him from time to time, just like you always do when there are people around you. He sees how when you talk about something your eyes meet his first, how you punch his shoulder lightly when he moans too loud cause his beer is just too good.

«You did that on purpose!» Yoongi laughs.

«I didn’t! She came out of nowhere!» Hoseok points at Hana that keeps laughing uncontrollably. 

«I told you I was coming with the cake!» she can’t even speak from how much she’s laughing.

«She did» you nod as you giggle.

«Did you have to come in that moment?» Hoseok takes a sip from his drink.

«Yes, it was the moment of the cake, you were the one in the way!» 

«Aish, unbelievable» Jin shakes his head.

«You’re trying to blame us when you were the one with his mind elsewhere» 

«I didn’t do it on purp-»

«Oh, you did» Yoongi’s shoulders lift repeatedly as his chest shakes.

«I’m betting everything you have that you did it on purpose cause we had a fight ten minutes before»

Jungkook bursts out laughing: «Yah, why would you bet everything he has?» 

You cackle beside him, your head falling backwards.

«Cause he has more than me! Have you see his beanie?» the older points at Hoseok’s head.

«It’s a gift, dummy» he clicks his tongue on his palate «and I’m telling you I didn’t!»

The memory is one of those that make you titter when you think about it. It was Yoongi’s birthday and Jin gladly made his cake with so much affection, you remember that he spent the whole day working on it, it was so pretty and you could already feel it melt in your mouth. You were excited to try it cause you knew that he made it based on Yoongi’s likes that in terms of cakes are pretty similar to yours, however, you never got the chance to taste it. Hana was helping him in the kitchen and you swear you heard her say that she was going to come out with the cake but-

«Aish, you literally hit it just at the right spot to make me dig my face in it!»

That’s what happened. Hoseok turned around just as Hana was coming out of the door and he hit it with his elbow as he was turning, Yoongi was right behind him and Hana just a few centimetres away trying to pass through. The cake went upwards and Yoongi couldn’t even blink twice that he had it all over his face, face deep into the cream. 

«Yah, hajima-» Jimin is on the verge of tears «I can’t see when I laugh»

«You’re so dumb» Eunji hits his shoulder.

«What, what? I really can’t see!»

The waiters bring the food to the table, Jin slaps the ass of one of them as he puts the dishes in front of him and it makes Jimin laugh harder as the poor guy scoffs at him. He talked a lot about one of the waiters especially, said that he had a lot of potential and was a really good person, so you guess it’s him. 

A dish full of kkaennip jangajji gets placed in front of you, rice as banchan on the side, chopsticks shining. 

«I was craving this yesterday!» Hyunjoo wheezes at the sight, eyes wide as she dives down on her plate and smells it with all her might. Hana and you giggle at your friend, Eunji smiling happily at her. It’s so good to see her happy with such a little thing, sometimes she texts the girl group chat deep at night craving for things that make you wince; just four days ago she was craving for a combination that- ew, pancakes and ketchup.

Jin pats Yoongi’s shoulder.

«Yoongi made me cook it appositely» 

You don’t expect her to lift her head with that look on her face, but she does. Her eyes water and the corners of her lips lower at the look of the future father of her child.

«I love you» she sniffs, making Yoongi burst out in a laugh.

«I know, I love you too sweetie» he rubs her back lovingly «now eat, will you?»

Hoseok’s eyes are big just at the scene in front of him, totally taken aback by the sweetness between the two. Jungkook feels his inside burn as he stares down at his plate, fingers tingling just to touch you in any way possible, even a brush of his fingers on your shoulder would be enough. He wishes he could just show you the same as Yoongi does with Hyunjoo. You only smile at the two, not really noticing the way his eyes peek at you.

«Okay, I’m hungry» Jimin is the first to dig down into his meal, chopsticks grabbing the perilla leaf from his plate to wrap it around the rice. 

The table fills with giggles and snorts once more, the atmosphere is light and cozy. Your friends make it easy for you to love them, every single one. Of course they have their moments - like that time that you fought with Taehyung cause he called you four times in an hour while you were at work, or the other when Hoseok and you fought over a pen -, you have them too, but they’re like a second family, you wouldn’t want it in any other way. Your eyes meet Jungkook at the thought, almost as if he’s the bright sun behind the clouds, and you feel it rooted deep inside you, how much he means. His mouth his full, cheeks swollen as he munches on the rice but when he feels your eyes on him he turns around immediately. Even when he look like a squirrel full of almonds, you-

«Shibal, why are they like this?» Taehyung huffs loudly beside you. Your attention shifts to him, he has a big scowl on his face and he stares angrily at the perilla leaves in front of him, chopsticks trying as much as they can to separate one from the other. You scoff at him, shake your head.

Jungkook still has his eyes on you, he watches as you bring your chopsticks to the dish to grab the corner of the leaf and slide one of the sticks under it. You slowly move it from side to side to make it part from the other underneath, his eyes wide and his cheeks full like a mochi he stares as you bring it to Taehyung’s dish and place it on his rice.

Only then he gulps: «Yah!» 

Your shoulder raise frightened, head turning immediately with your heart in your throat. You see his mouth open, eyes big and eyebrows cocked in a shocked expression, Namjoon’s words echo in his ears. Now, they definitely feel venomous. 

You’re still his best friend.

«Wha- what? What happened?» you quiver.

Taehyung peeks over your shoulder, eyes glued to Jungkook’s face. Jimin and Eunji in front of you stare at the scene with their knowing expressions but they clearly don’t understand what’s happening cause no one knows the full version of the story. And Jungkook suddenly feels his stomach close up and his breath getting stuck as he looks at you.

«You- why… I can’t do this,» he shakes his head and brings his hands to his lap «I’m going out for a minute» 

His chair chimes strident as he slides it backwards, and a second later he’s walking towards the door of the restaurant with his hands by his sides and everyone looking at him. You don’t seem to remember how to breathe for a bunch of seconds. 

What happened? What-

«Oh, fuck» Jimin brings his hands on his hair, tugging at them nervously. Eunji gulps down her food, eyes on the empty spot beside you, Taehyung looks over at the door, Namjoon breathes in nervously and Jin and Hana look each other with eyes that seem to communicate words that you don’t grasp simply because you aren’t looking anywhere but at Jungkook’s dish, his chopsticks laid on the brims. 

Yoongi clears his throat, looks over at her girlfriend, Hoseok peeks at you and a second later you’re storming out of the restaurant with their eyes on you and yours already trying to see Jungkook from the glass of the door.

When it shuts behind you, Namjoon licks his lips and smiles.

«Finally, it had to happen» he nods light hearted, Yoongi scoffing as he tries to get a look of you two outside.

«Yah, give them some privacy» Taehyung scolds his hyung, Hoseok shaking his head at the group.

You can read the second part here: Closer: Too Close

Read more about Closer here: Closer

Taglist: @p-i-e-d-p-i-p-e-r, @kaitlynlovesbm, @bytheinaya, @jub-jub, @taolucha, @mianyas1998, @seoulrenebae-blog, @ppeachyttae, @gluk97, @jk97bam, @diorh0seokie, @gwsjungkookie, @moonlikemeh, @skzthinker, @jungkookieeee97, @eysloveskoosomuch, @sleepy-sae, @jjkw-7, @singularityjes, @spookybirstarfish, @vvicadiction, @kimchijeonjk, @suciedad-divina, @katarinamae

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[heyidkyay]

And I'm petrified of being alone, now |

Part Fifteen

Matty Healy x reader

Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.

What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way? 

Authors Note: Honestly loved writing this one! Lots of tension, so many emotions! First scene has a few flashbacks in italics so watch out! Hope you enjoy x

> Last update: look back here if you'd like!

Masterlist

A list of things I remember about last night:

George buying a fan a bottle of champagne.. then four more for the table. He’d been six shots in and feeling more than a little generous.

Matty and I out in the smoking area, whispering back and forth, then giggling as we tried to knick a lighter from the back pocket of this big burly bloke trying to chat up the blonde beside us.

Hann leaving early but with smiles for all of us and the promise of seeing Adi and I again soon! 

Finn’s text saying that Teddy was fast asleep and all fine- an utter reassurance not just to me, but seemingly Matty too, who’d cooed over the picture I’d received alongside it.

Matty dragging me out onto the dance floor when a certain song had come on, his hands on my waist, mine tangled in his hair, the lights bright, the music loud..

The last round of shots, or one of?

Ross standing on a table??

Adi then slipping out with Ross- note to self, text Adi!!

And then…

Then the cab ride home!

But, I supposed it wasn’t headed home, or at least not mine, because now that I thought about it, dizzying images of awkward fumbles in the dark, searching for a light switch, hastily turned into a terrible attempt at trying to scrounge up some food, only a little less drunk than what we’d been when we’d left the club. But then even those soon spun and fluttered away, moving onto heavy hands and heated looks…

I froze, taking in the unfamiliar feel of the bed sheets beneath me and the weight of an arm thrown around my waist. How suddenly the skin beneath it felt hot at the realisation of its touch. I allowed my wide eyes to wander, holding my breath, the remnants of sleep quickly slipping from me as worry overwhelmed it. I saw the cemented walls, the soft hues, the sunlight which flickered in through the far window.

I didn’t know this place, but at the same time I felt as though I did.

I let my eyes fall close again, only briefly, when I finally allowed myself a moment to breathe, inhaling slowly so as to not stir the man settled behind me. 

Fuck.

And that was all that would come to mind because I was panicking now. It felt like I had been dropped into a black hole head first, or some other kind of alternate reality- or maybe even five years in the past! Because this couldn’t be happening. It had to be a dream.

But my thoughts kept on betraying me.

“Don’t run from me.” He whispered in the dim light of his kitchen as his fingers skittered over the length of my jaw, gently coercing me into meeting his gaze once again.

We’d been making toast, he’d only had a spoonful or so of butter left but had latched onto the idea the second we’d walked through the front door, the cab having not long left us. He’d pulled jams and spreads from high cupboards to goad me into it too, and I could do nothing but stand there and watch on, perfectly content and with a permanent smile etched into my face.

He’d patted the countertop beside him not long after finding a new loaf of white bread in the tin, gesturing me on round to sit on its top whilst he got to work.

“What do you fancy?” He’d asked me, plopping a slice into his sleek toaster, one which looked a decade newer than my own.

“You decide.” I had gambled, happy to just watch him laugh whilst he worked, licking his thumb free of chocolate and swearing under his breath when the butter finally ran dry.

On the plate I’d then been handed, sat four sections, each one a different spread to the other. He’d grinned up at me when he had passed it over and had watched on as I’d chuckled and picked a slice up.

“Blueberry, fine choice.” He’d hummed, his drawl deep and tinged with a faint hint of amusement. I’d shrugged, sheepish for some reason, and licked at the corner of my mouth to swipe the crumbs away from the bite I had just taken.

“Didn’t even know it existed.” I’d told him truthfully, taking another bite before reaching out to have him try. 

His movements had been careful at that, as though he’d been surprised by the offer, but then he’d let me feed him and had grinned around the sweet taste.

“Good?” I’d asked him, already moving to withdraw my hand before his fingers caught around my wrist. I'd blinked, confused and slightly startled by the suddenness of the gesture, but his hold hadn’t been harsh or hurtful, merely just that, a hold.

He had nodded at me in answer to my question, but then he’d taken the bitten slice from my grasp to place down somewhere on the counter.

“Matty?” I'd heard myself say.

He’d merely stepped on closer, “You have something.” His voice gruff.

He had lifted his free hand up towards my face, the other still caught on mine, and let the pad of his thumb brush away the tiniest piece of jam my cheek had caught. I’d felt my breath catch at the motion, somewhere in the very back of my throat, and then swallowed thickly at the sight of him placing the same finger into his mouth, sucking it clean.

I’d looked away, feeling the fierce rush of alcohol and embarrassment heat my face.

“Don’t run from me.”

His fingers still touched me now, even as he slept on, completely oblivious to the chaos that was my mind, the world that had continued on around us.

What would they say? What would they think?

Slowly, I forced myself to start moving, unable to continue lying in a bed that wasn’t my own. I hated myself a little for the fact that it was his, something deep inside of me knowing that this would’ve been so much easier had it simply been a stranger.

I lifted his hand from around my waist first, ever so careful not to have him stir, then silently slipped from between the sheets, my legs sliding out first before I willed my torso to follow. 

I picked up the first thing I saw from off of the floor, the white shirt he’d been wearing the night before, and pulled it on over my shoulders. My eyes skittered about the rest of the space, taking in everything that made up Matty’s room whilst simultaneously trying to find the dress I’d arrived in the night before. 

“I don’t think anyone has ever made me feel like you do.” He murmured into the space between us, my legs pressed against the counter top and dangling either side of his hips, his fingers grasped my chin, mine cuffed somewhere around his wrist. 

“It’s fucking maddening.” He continued on in the hushed tone he'd adopted, though no one was around to hear him had he spoken any louder, “I keep pulling away when I feel I get too close, scared you might push me away completely. ‘Cause what would I do then? Where would that leave me?”

I could feel the blood rushing in my ears and the way that my hands would surely shake if they weren’t already clinging to him. “I don’t understand, Matty.”

He smiled at me and I watched the way his eyes trailed their way across my face. I’d always liked his eyes. “I know. And that’s what kills me, ‘cause I don’t reckon you’ll ever think I’m enough.”

Enough. 

It threw me.

“You’re enough, what on Earth are you on about? Of course you’re enough.”

He shook his head at me ever so softly, with a sad smile this time around, whilst I dipped my own head to be nearer to his, wanting him to believe me. Willing him to.

“Matty-”

I was ripped away from the memory by the shuffling of sheets and stood in horror, barefoot in the middle of his bedroom, as the bed creaked with a slight movement. I held my breath, hands clutching at the buttons of the gaping shirt.

He sniffed unhappily, hands searching as he turned, but then was lured back into sleep.

I gave a stuttered exhale, heart pounding so hard it should’ve surely hurt, before continuing on with my search. I didn’t get too far though, not with my shaking hands and laboured breaths, the anxiety of it all overwhelming me now.

I could feel the pricking of tears that welled in my eyes, the stinging tingle of my nose as I fought not to cry. Why? The only question worth repeating, over and over and over. Why the fuck had I gone and fucked this all up?

“Mouse?”

My head shot up, startled by the suddenness of his voice and the realisation that I’d cowered into the wooden chair sat on the wall nearest to the window. Matty shifted in the sheets, sleep clouding his mind before I choked on a questionable sob and he was all but tumbling his way on over to me, catching on bed linens and fumbling across the floor.

“I need you to know, okay?” He whispered to me in the quiet of the kitchen, his wary face now cradled in the palms of my hands whilst his soft eyes stared back at me, mirroring an emotion I felt but couldn’t quite recall. “‘Cause, I don’t reckon I could say this whilst sober.”

“Know what, Matty?”

My fingers dug into the skin of my arms.

“Mouse, you hearin’ me?”

His voice sounded so different now, laced with a gruff edge I’d only ever heard during late night phone calls when he’d stayed too late at the studio and wanted company. There was an urgency to his tone now.

“Squeaks, just lemme know what I can do.” Matty rushed out, his face wrinkled with worry whilst his hands faltered, unsure whether or not to touch. “Please.”

Another sob ripped its way through me.

“I’m sorry.” I told him in earnest, crying hard enough now that I had to have been gasping to breathe, “I’m sorry, I, I just- I don’t know what to do now. I’m sorry, Matty. So sorry.”

He didn’t reply, didn’t say a word actually. Just moved to cradle me close, wrapping his arms around my shoulders as though that would hold me together, his body shielding my head from the rest of the world.

“I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry for.” Matty murmured, so much like he had the night before but only sadder now. “Nothing at all.”

–

She was embarrassed. That much he knew.

Could feel the way she shied away from him now that she had calmed, still hidden away in his arms. He hated himself for it. He wanted to hate what had gone down last night too, but couldn’t bring himself to. What good would it do him now? Hate, always so stuck on it.

“Mouse.” He called out to her softly, after the quiet had been stretched and pulled far too thin. He swallowed thickly, “Let’s make some tea, yeah?”

He must've surprised her with his response because she glanced up at him almost unconsciously, but as soon as their eyes met hers were quick to dart away again. 

She opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out, stare trained on the farthest wall. Matty licked at his bottom lip, still crouching in his position by the chair he had in the corner, moving his hands to now gently rest them by the knobs of her knees. 

He’d never been good at shit like this. Comfort.

He always got stuck in this place between panic and unease, forced to commit to empathising with another person and suspending his own agenda. It made him feel like he needed to make things better then and there, if only to save himself the strain of dealing with emotions.

That, and his mind was still so bleary due to the abrupt wake up, his heart still clenched to the point of exertion due to the spear of anxiety she’d propelled right through him.

“We can talk there, alright? Just, don’t leave just yet. Please?”

He felt bad for even asking her to stay but he knew her far too well, could see how desperate she was to run now, to escape her feelings and everything that had brought this moment to an abrupt head.

“Please?” Matty repeated even softer than he had before and was thankful when she finally nodded, a small thing he might not have seen had he blinked, but a nod nonetheless. “Okay.” He breathed out, something in him settling now that he knew she wouldn’t be making a run for the hills, “Okay, I’ll get a start on it then. You can have a look through them drawers over there, yeah? Find something, whatever, I don’t mind.”

He saw the bob of her throat as she swallowed and lingered on the motion until she nodded again.

By the time he’d made it out into the kitchen he was all but kicking himself, cursing as he tried to keep his temper in check. Of all the things he could have fucking done last night, why did he have to go and fuck the one good thing in his life up? She’d never fucking forgive him for this, even if she realised what had actually gone down and not what she’d just conjured up in that pretty little head of hers. 

Matty channelled his regret and sorrowful mood into hammering a pair of teabags into two empty mugs, figuring it to be the only way he could vent without banging everything about. He flicked on the kettle and moved to the fridge to pull the milk out, listening to it begin to boil instead of the stuttering of his pulse.

He only realised he’d been glaring a hole into the tiled wall when the thing finally whistled and the soft pad of shuffling feet echoed across the kitchen floor. Matty couldn’t help the way his head turned to find her.

“Hungry?” He asked, rubbing at his eyes, and although his voice was barely above a murmur it still felt too loud. She simply shook her head. Which was just as well really, he didn’t think he could even stomach this brew the way he was strung so tight. 

He dipped his chin in retort, ringing the two tea bags out before turning back to face her again. He paused when he found that her eyes were locked on the counter she’d been sat on the night before, Matty’s mind immediately flashed back to the skin of her thighs beneath his hands, the dip of her waist, the gentleness she’d held his face with, both the longing and sadness in her eyes when she told him he was enough.

He had wanted to scoff then, now even, but he’d never do that to her. If she thought he was worth even a fraction of the attention she gave him, then he’d take it. He was selfish in that regard, and couldn’t afford to waste anything she gifted him.

Christ, he sounded like a proper nut. How’d he let himself get so fucking gone on this girl?

Truthfully, he hadn’t even realised the depth of it until right then.

And now he had to be an actual grown-up and sort out the mess he’d made of things before he even got a chance to try to riffle through his messy array of feelings and their slow rising alarm bells. Another time- another day, even.

Matty cleared his throat as gently he took the seat beside her on the trio of barstools he had lined up on one side of his kitchen island, then faltered slightly, “Um, you good here or you wanna like, move to the settee or somethin’?”

She shook her head, hands careful as she moved to cradle the mug he’d just slid on over to her. He noticed how she moved her gaze from the counter down to the milky brew when he sat.

“Right,” He muttered, “alright.”

It was stupid, to feel so fucking incompetent then. In a moment he really should have been able to find the right words. Because Matty, somehow, had run out of things to say. And it was an accomplishment in itself, that he had to note, he wasn’t one to ever really be at a loss for words. But then again, Mouse was the biggest anomaly he’d faced so far.

He cleared his throat again and decided to just sip at his tea, noting that it was nicer than the usual scalding hot coffee he’d gulp down on his way out each morning.

Mouse went to open her mouth again, he saw the movement just out of the corner of his eye, and Matty already knew what she was going to say.

“Don’t,” He rushed out, though not unkindly. “No need for sorries, yeah?”

Her jaw snapped swiftly shut and she huddled in on herself slightly, staring back into the swirl of her brew. Matty immediately felt guilty.

He licked at his lower lip, feeling a cut there beneath his tongue just as a silence settled once more, one that was all the more suffocating.

He figured he’d best just get it over with, because at least then he’d be put out of the itching longing he had to end the quiet.

“I just,” He immediately paused, noting the way she had tilted her chin towards him at the sound of his voice, he coughed lightly then tried again. “Last night,” She tensed, and God, he had to steel himself further at that, “Nothing happened, alright? Well, yeah, I mean, fuck. Shit happened, but like we didn’t have sex or anything, I wouldn’t do that to you, Squeaks. You were drunk. It’d be a shitty move, yeah? So, just, if that’s what you’ve been worrying about, then..”

Matty glanced over at her wearily, internally wincing at the fucking stumble he’d made of things there, he found that her head was better turned towards him now, although her eyes still remained low. He watched her lips part, then quiver as though she was unsure of her response.

He let her have a minute.

“You were drunk, too.”

It didn’t sound like an accusation but felt a little like one. Still, he kept his head. “Not enough to not remember.”

The skin between her brows knitted, Matty could practically see the whirl of her many moving thoughts.

“I was naked.”

It took all his strength not to splutter at that, because he’d been trying his fucking hardest not to linger too much on that fact. Or how the sight of her in his clothes, even now, sent something stirring through his gut.

“Yeah,” Once again clearing his throat, Matty took another stilted breath, “Though to be fair, you’d had a shower then fell asleep like that after I said I’d be quick about mine.” 

His eyes flickered outwards, unable to look at her then, thinking back to the sight she’d made all sprawled out on his bed, face softened by sleep and the duvet pulled over most of her waist. 

“I didn’t see much,” He felt the need to add, because she was obviously a little torn up about it from the way she was wringing her hands, and knew for a fact that Mouse had a shit fucking perception of herself too. The way she breezily commented on her body and the scars that marred her face gave way to that fact, although most wouldn’t pick up on it, and he had realised quite early on that she didn’t either. Matty supposed he must have his rehab therapist to thank for that little enlightenment. 

He chuckled lightly when the image of her rippled to the forefront of his mind, clinging to the duvet with a strength no unconscious person should probably have. “You practically cocooned yourself in the covers anyway, threw a proper fit when I tried to steal some of it back.”

She smiled then, a tiny thing, mind, but a smile nonetheless. And that alone at least eased his mind a little bit.

“Thinking back, I probably should’ve just slept in the guest room but I was almost dead to the world. Sorry.” He was sincere in his apology, it’d been a misstep on his part, he just hadn’t been thinking. Hadn’t expected her to react so badly either.

“No need.” She said then, her voice a little more confident now as she mimicked his earlier words, “I shouldn’t, well, I shouldn’t have just assumed.”

Matty rolled his eyes and finally chanced a glance back over at her, so very pleased to see her looking back. Even then in that moment, after a right scare, fucking sobbing her heart out, and only just having woken up, she looked blinding.

He didn’t know if he had ever described a girl quite like that, or anyone really. But it felt too true to not shine a light to.

He internally chastised himself again- did ageing make you soppy or some shit? The fuck was he on.

“Yes, you should have. I’d’ve done the same, anyone would’ve.” He chuckled instead, loving the way her sheepish smile only curved up on the one side. “Least now we know you’d be fuckin’ mortified if I ever tried anything on.” He tried to joke, but it fell flat.

Squeaks swivelled her seat round to knock her knees against his own, then wrapped her cold feet around his ankle, “I was- I just haven’t, you know..” Matty arched a single brow, still rather pleased with their newfound position, his eyes lingering on the way her borrowed shirt slipped down to expose the majority of her collarbone. “.. slept with anyone in a while, and yeah, I don’t know, I wouldn’t want to go and ruin anything we have with a drunken mistake.”

Matty’s heart faltered. Felt it fucking implode and then shrivel up inside his chest. Mistake. 

He fought hard to keep his mask in place, smiling away. He sipped at his brew to keep the sudden sickness that jilted his stomach at bay then patched his bleeding heart back up. “How long’s a while?” He teased, smirking felt easier than a smile anyway.

It was her turn to roll her eyes at him then, laughing softly when she retracted her gaze, though their legs stayed intertwined.

“I don’t really know.”

“Yes, you do.” Matty laughed, having none of it, “Come on, a couple months?” She kept quiet, “A year?”

He frowned when she began to chew on her bottom lip, fighting the urge to reach out and stop her. “Two?”

“Six.” She answered him, probably tired of the guessing game.

“Six.” Matty murmured, reeling at the information. Six years. He’d fucking explode, “Is that even healthy?”

Squeaks was so quick in the way her hand shot out to swat him, “It’s fine, you dickhead! And besides, I just meant properly, you know? Like, there’s been a few quick passings but nothing, nothing like that.”

“Wow.”

“Don’t be a prick about it!” She immediately retorted to his breathy reply, obviously a little embarrassed and annoyed. “I have a toddler! And I’m always so fucking busy! I don’t even have the time to think about it!”

“Sounds like what you need is to get laid, babe.”

He snorted when she wacked him again, purposely ignoring the thoughts of her and him, drunken mistake.

“Leave off!”

“Fine then, I will for now.” Matty laughed, rubbing at his bicep, she continued to glare. “You want breakfast then? Or lunch now, I ‘spose. Can order in.”

Her knee knocked against his once more. Goosebumps trailed the length of his skin.

“Need to be back to pick up Teds from the nursery but yeah, lunch sounds nice.” She smiled, and for a second Matty was frozen in that very moment, content to just watch her smile at him like that forever.

Nice nice nice.

–

“I can’t believe you’re actually doing this.” I said, my tone almost scolding, but I’d been unable to flat out deny Matty of his request to come and help me pick Teddy up from school. I’d spent the rest of the day at his place, been given an actual tour, eaten some good food, and thankfully had been able to avoid any more awkward conversations pertaining to our wake up call that morning.

“What? You said I could!” He sounded almost petulant. “Besides, it’ll be lowkey, I have my hat, a hood. No one will know! Also, I’m not that important. Don’t reckon many four year olds are listening to Sex on the drive home.”

I snorted but my mind still flashed to memories of only hours earlier. My cheeks pinked. “First- lowkey, really? Aren’t we too old to be saying that? And second, that hat is the same fucking hat you haven’t taken off since Christmas!”

“Before Christmas, actually.” Matty said snidely, smirking all the while, even as he ducked to avoid the swat of my hand. “And anyway, I love this hat, so kindly fuck off.”

“Charmin’.”

Matty spent the rest of the walk to Teddy’s nursery singing This Charming Man whilst my mind lingered on his words. Claims of how he loved the small, insignificant gift Teddy and I had handed him. 

By the time we made it past the school gates, we’d been nudging shoulders and grazing hands most of the walk, so wrapped up in one another that I didn’t even realise I’d forgotten my phone somewhere until I patted down my pockets in the playground.

“Shit.” I muttered.

Matty, still blissfully unaware of my sudden circumstance and humming softly, kept on surveying the small school. “Yeah, the mural could use a bit of work but I think it’s meant to look shit, you know. Reckon the kids probably did it.”

Furrowing my forehead at his words, I then peered up at him, “No, I forgot my phone.”

Realisation dawned but then he shrugged, as if it were no big deal, “It’s probably still at mine, you use it this morning?”

I shook my head, feeling panicked now, which was stupid because it was just a phone. But, it also housed most of the things I considered important in my life; my work contacts, documents, notes, and To Do’s; Teddy’s doctors and dentist and school’s numbers; all the memories I’d made in the last few months that I had yet to save onto my icloud or hard drive; and pictures of Matty and I, as well as the rest of the guys too, but also our texts and little messages on Twitter and Instagram.

Losing it? I hated the very thought.

“No, I haven't touched it since last night. Could’ve left it at the club, or in the cab, or the-”

Matty’s hands came to cradle my shoulders, making me pause, and I realised he’d moved to stand before me, looking down at my pinched expression with a small smile. “You’re stressing, just take a breath. Alright? We’ll find it, ‘cause I’m sure it's back at mine anyway, but if not, then we can get it blocked and whatnot, try to get a new one before tomorrow.”

I forced myself to suck in a breath, still reeling from the feeling of my heart dropping to my arse. “Yeah, yeah I know, it’s just-”

“One of them things.” He finished with a knowing smile, hands squeezing my shoulders briefly before he wrapped me up in a hug. “Stressin’ won’t help and will only have Teds all wound up when he sees, yeah? We’ll sort it.”

His words ebbed my every worry just for a moment, I took another breath and let my arms find his waist, returning the hug and enjoying the way he settled his chin atop my head. 

“Okay.” I whispered into the edge of his coat, smiling when he squeezed me tight and then pulled away, “Sorry.”

Matty rolled his eyes at me, “Shut up.”

I chuckled to myself, shoving my hands into my pockets to keep from reaching out again and instead glanced about the rest of the playground. Most of the mums were here now and that panic that had subsided only a second ago almost came back in full force when I noticed how intensely they were watching me, or rather, Matty and I.

Carefully, I pivoted behind Matty, keeping my back to the gated fence which enclosed the school, but also forcing Matty to turn confusedly after me, his own back now facing the rest of the watchers.

“What the fuck are you doing?” He snorted with a bemused sort of frown, “Hiding?”

“Maybe.”

That had been the wrong thing to say because Matty nearly turned to glance back around, I reached out to stop him, hand encasing his elbow. “Don’t, alright? There’s a shit ton of mums just watching us. Got eyes like hawks or something.”

Matty merely blinked back at me before laughing, “You’re for real? Come on, they can’t be that bad.”

He went to turn again, only this time I couldn’t stop him. “Matty!” I called in a hissed whisper and he was quick to spin back around, face a little shocked.

“You reckon they’ll close in on us? I dunno if I can outrun them.”

I spluttered out an unexpected laugh, “I hope not. They usually hate me.”

Matty’s frown was quick to make a reappearance, “What, why?”

Shrugging, I glanced over his right shoulder, “You want a list? I’m a young mum, single, my kid doesn’t know his dad, I look like this, I don’t have a normal job or stay at home to take care of him, and sometimes Teds gets picked up by Finn or Adi, I don’t attend their stupid little-”

“Fuckin’ hell, alright I get it.” Matty said, his hand reaching out for my elbow just to slow me on my rant. “What a bunch of cunts.”

I forced a smile, “Yeah, well. Just another part of my life.”

Matty pulled a strange face at that, but before I could begin to decipher it, the classroom doors were opening and I was quick to step forward. Matty lingered behind me, keeping his hood up.

A few kids were called when Miss Sparks spotted certain parents and she did the same for Teddy when she saw me and smiled. “Teddy, your mum’s here!”

It only took a minute or so before Teddy came stumbling out with his backpack thrown over one shoulder and his hair a messy mass of curls. I grinned at the sight of him and picked him up when he hurried to grab at my legs, “Heya, little man. Good day?”

Teddy nodded in my arms, opening his mouth to tell me all about it when he peered over my shoulder and paused, his eyes lit up at the face he found there. “Matty!” Teddy all but squealed, immediately wriggling in my hold to make an escape towards the man.

Matty laughed, his eyes wide and dancing with warmth as he held out his arms for Teddy to jump on into. I rolled my eyes at the exchange but couldn’t help the way my whole being radiated with the beaming smile I wore.

“Alright, monster?” Matty greeted him, settling Teddy on his hip once he was done playfully swinging him about a bit. “How was nursery, hey?”

Teddy was still so awed by Matty’s appearance at his school, of all places, that he was eager to tell the man literally everything about his day. It was only once we’d managed to make a quick exit out of one of the side gates, that Teddy finally asked, “How’d you get here, Matty?”

Matty merely grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at the boy, “Magic.”

With a wrinkled nose, Teddy giggled, “Matty!”

“Alright, alright, jheeze.” Matty relented, all too easily, “I annoyed your mum into letting me come pick you up, didn’t I?”

Teddy looked at me with that, as though I’d gone and put all of the stars into the night sky. “Ta, mama!”

I shook my head at him fondly, leaning in to press a kiss to my baby’s cheek. “You hungry?” I asked him, instead of focusing on the entire scenario at hand, how Teddy seemed to cling to Matty and how entirely charmed Matty was by the boy. They appeared so close in that moment, it made me notice just how different Teddy’s reactions to Matty were to that of Finn’s, a man who had always been a constant in Teddy’s life.

The thought sent me spiralling down a rabbit hole, but thankfully before I could fall any further Teddy was nodding happily and Matty was making a suggestion, “Dinner at mine then?”

Teddy seemed thrilled with the idea but I merely raised a brow at Matty, “What ever will we make with your one egg and half a dozen jams?”

“Toast?” Matty grinned, enjoying the eye roll he received in return as he leaned in to laugh with Teddy. He looked back to me after a moment, “Could head to the shops if you wanna cook, or just order in.”

I pursed my lips, “Would you be able to?”

“To what?” Matty frowned.

I looked ahead as I clarified, “Get some shopping.” 

It was his turn to roll his eyes then, nudging his elbow against mine, “Yes, you muppet.” He shook his head when he glanced back at Teddy, feigning a huff that made the toddler giggle, “What do you want then, little man?”

“Ghetti.”

Matty could only blink.

–

By the time we’d made a quick whip around the local Waitrose (because Matty lives in an affluent area and not because he’s ‘pretentious’, he’d like to claim) and back to his, we’d been pictured more than a dozen times. 

Although, we’d only found this out when I’d finally caught sight of my phone, wedged between Matty’s bed-frame and the mattress, and managed to charge it. In between then and now, I had roped Matty into helping me cook whilst Teddy worked at the counter doing today’s reading.

“B-ah.” Matty carefully sounded out, still wearing one of the mock aprons Ross had apparently gifted him one Christmas, it was frilly, pink and had ‘This girl loves meat’ written in a pretty font. My own was of a similar fashion, only the words ‘Always use protection’ were warped across its front. “B-ah-guh.” He said once more, leaning up against the counter by Teddy.

“Bag!��� Teddy exclaimed excitedly and looked practically giddy when Matty loudly cheered for him.

“Go on, mate! Knew you could do it.” Matty complimented, grinning down at Teddy before ruffling his hair and pulling him into a one armed hug. “Let’s see if we can get the next one before your mum’s done with the spaghetti, yeah?”

Teddy was all too happy to agree, something I slightly resented seeing as he whinged and moaned whenever I asked. But it was nice to see him enjoying his homework for once, a concept that was still so mad to me considering the kid was four. 

“‘Bout five minutes to boil now,” I told them as I wiped my hands on a nearby tea towel. My phone finally powered on then and so I moved about the counter to grab at it, not wanting to miss any important notifications. Adi and I had a guest on the show this week and had yet to be filled in on the requirements needed.

Only, before I could even pick the thing up, it started buzzing like mad with hundreds of notifications. 

With wide eyes I turned to glance over at Matty, who had paused in his helping of Teddy and was already staring back at me. I blinked and then went to pick the thing up, even as it continued to buzz, but Matty was now moving too, “No, wait.”

I shook my head, wanting to know what the hell was happening, but Matty had been closer, quicker, and was already reaching out to grab it. “Let me look first.”

“Matty.” I huffed, annoyed, but the man didn’t relent. Actually his expression only worsened as he scrolled through the thousands of alerts on my phone. “Matty! What’s the fucks going on?”

“Bad word!”

I winced, then turned to look over my shoulder, “Sorry, Teds, won’t do it again. No chocolate for me tonight, yeah?” My toddler nodded sternly, it made me smile before I glanced back at Matty who’s mood had obviously soured. He tossed the phone back down onto the counter and went to leave the kitchen, I could only assume to look for his own, “Oi!” I admonished, but he just shook his head, seemingly muddled.

“Sorry. Just- gimme a sec.”

I watched as he left, Teddy eyes latched onto him too before he turned back to face me, “Sad Matty?” He asked and I gave him another small smile.

“Not sure, baby. But he’ll be okay in a second.” Or at least I hoped. Teddy took it though and nodded, already going back to his work, though he kept looking over at the door every few seconds.

I forced my shoulders to drop, knowing the tension would only wreak havoc on my back come bed tonight, and took a careful step towards my phone. 

It had stopped pinging so incessantly now, but the odd notification still came through.

[HOMESCREEN] 17:18 Twitter now  Trending.. Notifications..  Instagram now Open to view News 1m Matty Healy's new budding romance? 

My heart stopped. It was all there, us dancing at the club, getting into the cab, Matty at his front gate this morning with the food delivery driver, us walking to pick up Teddy, the hug we'd shared in the playground, Matty holding a bundle that could have only been Teddy in an aisle at the shops- thankfully his face was hidden, the only saving grace of it all. But still, it all looked so convincing. 

We were definitely in deep shit.

“Squeaks?”

My head snapped up to find Matty standing over by the counter, his body tense but a gentle hand holding Teddy’s own, the horror I felt must’ve shown on my face because he winced.

“We’ve gotta talk.”

#the 1975 #fic #matty healy #angst #radio host #reader #x reader #x you #george daniel #ross macdonald #the 1975 band #adam hann #fluff #humour #matty healy fic #matty 1975 #matty healy x reader #matty x reader #matty healy x you #ao3 #pining #fame #strangers to lovers #mum reader #kid fic #getting together #SLOWBURN #mutual pining #Warnings #aipoban

[exitpursuedbyavulcan]

Enclosed

When he's far away at sea, Tom finds himself infinitely grateful that you found work at a photography studio.

Author's Note: This fic, two days late? Noooooo.... Also! I've inadvertently made all the Tommy B smuff fics connected, so this can either be read alone or as a sequel to "After the War"

Pairing: Tom Bennett x Reader (2nd person)

Warnings: masturbation (m), lingerie, references to oral sex (f receiving) and p in v sex

This work is a part of my 12 Days of Smuff event! Read the rest here.

My Masterlist

Enclosed

Prompt: Letters & Lingerie

Tom lay in his bunk with a cocky smile on his lips. He cast his eyes around the rest of the room, finding only one or two other sailors, both asleep and far enough away that they wouldn’t be able to hear him.

This ritual was well worth skipping his mid-day meal.

He weighed the envelopes in his hands for a moment. It felt heavier than it usually did – that boded well for him. After taking a moment to inhale the perfume you had lovingly sprayed on the envelope, Tom dug into your letter.

Tom, my strapping husband,

You said in your last letter that your life in His Majesty’s Nave was ‘fucking boring.’ Shall I tell you how exciting my life back home is?

My uncle has changed the studio’s opening to eleven in the morning so he can get some sleep after staying up all night as an air raid warden. Which means I must find a way to fill that time, assuming I am not also sleeping as I often do after spending a night crammed into a shelter with every screaming and crying child in the whole goddamn neighborhood.

But when I am not sleeping, I often find myself doing the chores that Mum no longer has the energy to do. I swear, if I didn’t do the shopping and cooking, we’d all be eating nothing but bread. Since dad left, she just hasn’t been the same. I think him leaving again reminds her of the last war. He went missing for seven months, seven! I can’t imagine how awful it must have been for her.

Don’t you ever put me through that, Tom Bennett. Not even for a week. I swear I’d come to France myself to drag you back here by your ear.

Now that’s out of the way, I do have something somewhat exciting to tell you. My uncle’s been letting me use the camera a lot more than before he signed up to be a warden. I even got to do a family’s christening portrait all on my own! He wants me to be able to handle the studio on my own, should he ever get called up (not that we’re even slightly concerned about that, considering his age). Or – oh no. That’s not really why he’s doing it, is it? He wants me to be able to run it in case one day he doesn’t come back after the sirens go off, doesn’t he? I’m going to try not to think about that.

I brought it up because he’s allowed me to start using the portable camera rather than the big one in the studio. This way, I won’t always have to be nervous that he will walk in on me when I take pictures for you.

Speaking of, I think you’ll like what I enclosed today. I borrowed Mum’s, just as you asked.

Your adoring wife,

Tom stared at those two wonderful words. Husband. Wife.

He wished he’d been able to give you the ceremony you deserved. Not simply standing in the register office with all your parents looking on with half-hearted smiles before being rushed out almost immediately so the next couple could come in. You deserved so much more than that, roses and a band and a grand hall and all that shit. Once he was home, for good, he’d give it to you. All of it. Most of all, a big honeymoon. Not the one night in a shabby local hotel your parents, your uncle, and even his sister Lois had helped pitch in to get you. Only for him to have to leave again the next day.

The fact that he was leaving you as his wife instead of just as his best girl made it somehow so much harder.

But this helped.

He started by writing his reply to the actual content of your letter. If he started with the pictures, he knew he wouldn’t give a shit about whatever you’d written by the end.

My sweet darling wife,

I am so very sorry that you have things to do all day. Whenever I feel bad about sitting at the prow and staring at the endless ocean, I will remind myself that you are enduring such tortures as shopping and taking undoubtedly lovely family portraits. It will remind me that I should be eternally grateful that the king himself has sent me on the world’s most boring cruise.

Joking aside, I am very sorry you’re stressed. Give your mum my love and tell your uncle that I’m counting on him to look after you while I’m gone, and thank him for his good work (with the warden thing, not the photography). Please take care of yourself. I know you’re willing to stretch yourself thin for the people you love, but I love you too, and I’ll be pissed if I come home to a wife too exhausted to even fuck me.

I actually might not be bored for a few days. They’re sending us to do a job, even if I will be stuck in a rowboat for a day, maybe more. Ah well, at least I won’t be the one rowing, at least.

I’m very happy about you getting more responsibility at the studio. Of course, most of that is for selfish reasons, but I’m still proud of you, love. Can’t wait to see what you’ve enclosed. Oh and before I forget, I’d like to request something… red in your next letter.

Your proud husband,

Tom Bennett

He never wrote as much as you did, but he knew you didn’t mind. You didn’t want any details about the horrible, upsetting things he’d seen, it would only worry you too much. Besides, you knew what he really loved about your letters.

After taking another deep breath, Tom set the paper aside and finally allowed himself to look at your pictures.

“Oh, you gorgeous, gorgeous girl…”

The pearl necklace you wore was a little off-center, but Tom hardly noticed it. He was solely focused on what you were wearing—a full corset, in some kind of shiny, light-colored fabric. The top of it only held half of your perfect tits inside, allowing him to admire their smooth curves. What he wouldn’t give to hold them in his hands. Once he got home, he’d do just that for an hour at least.

Over your delightfully cinched waist, you’d worn a sheer petticoat with ruffles at the bottom – exactly like one you might have worn under your wedding dress, if you’d been able to wear one. He’d get you that, too. Even if only to go to your uncle’s studio to take pictures. Tom wouldn’t need to rent a morning coat, as he’d just wear his uniform, so he could spend extra getting you the perfect dress.

Maybe you could even redo the wedding night.

Tom surveyed the room again before lying back and sliding his hand below his waistband. He’d done this so many times that now, he got hard the instant he picked up the envelope, so he was still relatively proud of his restraint, and was sure you would be, too.

He started slowly, imagining slipping the petticoat off you. Imagine how you’d shiver as his finger ever so slightly brushed your skin. The sounds you’d make – sighs and little whimpers. He loved those little whimpers so much.

He let out his own soft sigh as he began to move his hand faster. Once the petticoat was down, he’d kneel in front of you and make quick work of your shoes, then take his sweet time unbuckling and lowering your stocking.

God, how he missed those legs, shapely and soft. He loved touching them, kissing them, laying between them. His hips kicked up as he imagined himself kissing his way up them when he got home, all the way up to that delightful place where your knickers dug into the little dip between your leg and your hips.

It was hard to hold back his moan at the thought.

He’d lower your knickers first, he decided. So he could bury himself in you until he was satisfied. Yours was a taste he craved as badly as he did for decent cigarettes. He sometimes woke from dreams of devouring you, thinking he could still taste you on his tongue.

Only when your legs were shaking would he stand, prowling behind you with his hands on your waist. He’d kiss your neck as he untied your corset. Or unhooked? He didn’t know, but he hoped it was untie – it was sexier.

The pearls would stay on the whole time as he kissed you, touched you, fucked you. He’d put them between your teeth to help you soften your cries and moans, then watch them fall back on your chest when you came. You always came with your mouth wide open as you screamed his name.

That memory of your voice and the way your nails would dig into his skin is what drove him over the edge, spilling himself into his hand.

Tom lay there, reliving his imaginings, until a bell rang, signaling it was time to get in the rowboats. He made sure to wipe his hand on the mattress of one of the rich cunts who mocked him and the other working-class boys before leaving, his own letter in hand.

He stopped by the room where they kept their post on his way to the rowboats, quickly folding his paper to stuff it into an envelope. A smile crept over his features as he addressed it to ‘Mrs. Tom Bennett,’ before filling out the rest. He was glad that you were living in your parent’s house, but he couldn’t wait until he could get a place just for the two of you.

Lastly, he wrote the date in the corner of the envelope, as you always liked to know when he received yours, so you could be sure to include all the relevant gossip he’d missed.

26 May, 1940

#tom bennett #tom bennett x reader #tom bennett fic #tom bennett fanfic #tom bennet fanfiction #tom bennet smut #tom bennett imagine #tom bennett x you #world on fire #ewan mitchell #12 days of smuff

[surrounded-bysea]

Last night’s hold

This is how my hold last night went, also my first time making a post on here that isn’t my intro post so I’m a little nervous but oh well.

I spontaneously decided to do a hold while I was out to dinner with some friends. As soon as I got home (around 8:00 pm), I started drinking a big cup of coffee. Then I started working on a paper, making sure to take big sips of water and tea every time I checked my word count. I also took a few breaks to scroll through my feed on here and rub myself through my panties. By the time the writing I needed to get done for the night was finished, I was at a 5, so not super desperate or anything yet but definitely would’ve gone to the bathroom if it were a normal day.

I got back on tumblr and read through some other omo blogs, especially people’s past holds, to get ideas for how to torture my own bladder. Around 11:00 my roommates came home, so I went out to say hi and washed the mug my coffee had been in and some other dishes in the sink, letting the warm water run over my hands to tease myself a bit, at this point I’m a 6 nearing a 7 for sure. I drank some iced tea from the fridge (I had maybe 4 or 5 oz left in a smaller bottle I’d been drinking from earlier) and refilled my water bottle. I went back in my room and did some squats then pressed on my bladder, which was starting to get pretty full. The long presses really helped tease me. I heard my roommates getting ready for bed and shutting off the lights in their rooms, so I felt okay to keep my hold going.

All of a sudden I’m at an 8. I was laying on my bed scrolling through tumblr and I had to keep rubbing myself, this time under my panties. My clit was starting to ache from my full bladder. I tried to read some omo fic on ao3 to distract myself, but I was so full I couldn’t focus and I realized I was at a 9. I was involuntarily squirming around and knew that if I stopped grabbing at myself I’d leak. At this point it was 12:20 am, I told myself I could wait until 12:30 am, then start getting undressed to get in the shower and let out some bigger leaks in there to tease myself. I was trying to edit my paper as a distraction, but by 12:25 am I was basically just clutching at myself trying to keep my pee in, I could feel my pee hole quivering trying to not let anything out, and I couldn’t stop squirming. I was at true desperation and it was so hot but I knew I couldn’t wet myself in my bed and still fully clothed.

I decided at to just start getting undressed so I could run to the bathroom (directly next to my bedroom) as soon as it turned 12:30 am, because the pee was really starting to push and I felt like I could feel it about to come out of me if I didn’t have my fingers over my pee hole trying to stop it. I was staring at myself in the full length mirror in my room while getting undressed and my bladder bulge was so big, but I couldn’t take too long really admire it because all I could focus on was how absolutely desperate I was and how badly I just wanted to let everything out. I started pacing back and forth to distract myself and hold it in. It was 12:27 am and I felt a dribble come out and hit my thigh, and I knew there was no way I could wait to run to the bathroom at 12:30 without making a puddle on my bedroom rug.

I ran to the bathroom with the intention of waiting until 12:30 to turn on the shower and let myself start leaking, but as soon as I saw the toilet something broke in me and I leaked. I had to sit down and pee started bursting out of me. The stream was so strong and it took a bit to feel any relief because I’d been so full from staying hydrated all night. As soon as I’d finished my pussy was so wet. I’m getting wet again just thinking about this experience and how hot it was.

I was disappointed in myself for not making it, I wish I’d done more to really tease myself once I’d gotten to an 8. Next time I do a hold I’m definitely going to try again for my plan to get in the shower. Hopefully I’ll have enough control to make myself go through a few rounds of leaking and continuing to hold, because leaks are honestly one of the hottest parts of getting desperate and holding for me. Maybe next time I’m holding I’ll post about it when I’m starting and let people on here either help me hold or also torture my bladder, since I would’ve loved to give up some control during this hold.

#omorashi #bladder control #piss kink #pee kink #bladder desperation #omo #bladder holding

[sirianasims]

We had dinner at the food stall behind the gallery, talking about everything and nothing. Paul asked about my costumes and I showed him some of my cosplays and even a few original designs on my phone. He could name every single character I’d done, and I was quite thrilled to discover that he was just as much of a geek as I was. I don’t know why I had expected otherwise, considering the kind of roles he played.

He told me he’d loved comics and superheroes since he was a child, so when the casting call for a live-action Llama Man series went out he had jumped at the chance even though he knew the risk.

And he’d been right. By the time the series ended, he was too established as Llama Man and casting directors were passing him over for more serious roles.

He didn’t seem to mind that much though. He said that being a lead actor was hard work and he much preferred smaller roles where he could have some more creative input. These days, he mostly worked on Llama Man: The Animated Series and a few other voice acting gigs.

After the gallery closed, we found ourselves on a bench outside. The night was warm. I didn’t feel like going back to my apartment yet, and Paul didn’t seem to be in any hurry either.

“Finally, the director told me that if I didn’t get it together, he was going to replace me with an actual llama next season. So, obviously I had to bring a llama for the launch party. He did not appreciate the gesture. Turns out very few llamas are house-trained.”

Our laughter echoed slightly in the empty plaza.

“You know, you remind me a little of my grandfather.”

“Ouch. You wound me. I’m not even forty, you know.”

“No, I mean, he was an actor as well. Conrad Richards. He loved pranks like that too.”

“Conrad Richards was your grandfather?”

“Well, he married my grandmother, but he was always grandpa Conrad to me.”

“That’s amazing. I was a big fan of his, actually. I liked how he always seemed to have fun with it, not like those actors who take themselves too seriously.”

“Yeah, he never took anything seriously. In every memory I have of him, he’s laughing.” My voice wavered slightly. “Sorry, I still miss him a lot.”

“Understandable.”

Paul took my hand.

“I wish I could tell you that it gets easier, but the truth is, it doesn’t. You just get better at carrying the pain.”

He looked away, seemingly lost in thought.

“When my father died, my mother told me that grief is just love that no longer has a home. It has nowhere to go. So, what you need to do is give it a new home. Surround yourself with friends and family. Love the ones you have left even harder. It doesn’t make the grief go away, but they will help you carry it.”

He cleared his throat and gave my hand a gentle squeeze before letting go. I immediately missed the warmth.

“Thank you, Paul. I mean it.”

“You’re welcome. Julia.”

We sat in silence for a moment. Then, he looked at his watch and smiled at me, back to his cheerful self.

“Sadly, as much as I’d love to, we can’t sit here and chat all night. I have to catch a flight back to the Valley in the morning. So unless you feel like walking me to my hotel to make sure I don’t get lost, we should probably part ways.”

“Sure. Where’s your hotel, then?”

He hesitated, his eyes searching my face.

“ZenView Heights. But -“

I leapt to my feet. “It’s this way.”

Paul grabbed my wrist and looked at me with a serious expression.

“Julia, it was a joke. And that’s way too far to walk. Are you really sure about coming back to my hotel?”

I tried to listen for that little voice in my head, the one that was supposed to warn me when I was about to do something stupid, but there was only silence. 

And Paul.

I nodded, slightly surprised at myself. Paul sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

“I don’t even know what I’m doing any more,” he muttered as we walked to the street to find a taxi.

beginning / previous / next

#duchellilegacy #duchellichapters #duchelligen5 #julia duchelli #paul romeo #cw: grief #my sincerest apologies to all you Conrad fans out there

[dandelionprints]

‘Dear Thomas…’

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Y/N

Summary: When a deal between Tommy Shelby and Oswald Mosley is made, Y/N and Tommy have to come up with a plan of their own to keep her safe whilst on her trip to Scotland. With no outside protection from the blinders allowed, what will the husband and wife do to give each other information in secret?

Warnings: mention of threats of SA/murder/violence, bad language. Reader discretion is advised, only read if you are comfortable with that kind of content.

Word Count: 4300

A/N: I had a lot of fun writing this and coming up with the concept! I’m actually quite proud of myself for finally completing this, I really hope you enjoy reading it!

Dear Thomas,

How are you my love? I hope you’re well, I’m missing you dearly although I am delighted that you took Mr. Mosley up on his offer for me to come away to Scotland for a month with him and Lady Diana. It’s such a lovely treat to get to take a break from the fast pace of everyday life back home. It’s so peaceful and quiet with no one around for miles. I need to make sure I thank them at the end of the trip.

We should come here together one day. I think that it would be good for your sanity and wellbeing when things get too stressful. I know you refuse the help but I think it would do you the world of good.

Mr Mosley has been ever so kind and has offered only the best when it comes to the views, food and days out. Everything is perfect. I could see me losing myself here! Caught up in the scenic views and fresh air, how beautiful it is.

How is Arthur doing? I know it’s only been a week since I left but his troubles have been playing on my mind slightly, I just hope he has the patience to see them through.

I know he can do it, especially with the support he has from you and Ada. I do wish you could have joined me on this trip but I know that Arthur needs you more, his habits are getting far too out of hand now. He has the best brothers and sister in the world, he said so himself.

There’s a young stableboy here too, he reminds me a lot of John. Poor John. I’m sorry to bring him up but I like to think that he’s still around, showing himself through other people. I will make sure to have a drink for him tonight.

The stableboy is called George. He has a wicked sense of humour and a laugh that could kill you just from the sheer hilarity of the sound it makes.

Before you start getting worried, he’s eighteen, so way too young for me. Besides, if I’m correct in thinking this, I have a pretty incredible man waiting for me when I get home. (That’s you by the way).

I’m sorry if you find this letter is too long but I miss you and I hope you don’t mind that I’m prattling on, it’s almost like by writing you a letter I’m actually getting to talk to you as if you were sitting right next to me. You with your bottle of whiskey and newspaper, and me with my cup of tea and a book.

I had a memory of you this morning too, remember when we were young and you would deliver my parents the daily newspaper each day because you knew how much my father liked to keep up with what was going on in the world? You always were so sweet. It’s funny what you remember when you’re on your own and have time to think, isn’t it?

Part of me wishes we could go back in time, even just for a day, to chase through the streets of Birmingham barefoot and run riot without a care in the world.

I remember when we made a deal with Arthur to go skinny dipping in the river and see who could last in the freezing temperatures the longest. Just as he’d stripped right down to his underwear, the old lady who lived in the house nearby came out with her walking stick waving in the air which soon had us all scurrying away. We were all so frightened within an inch of our lives that Arthur didn’t even bother to grab the clothes he’d taken off.

As much as I’d love to carry on writing this letter, I know you’re probably busy either looking after Arthur or working so I’ll leave you to it. As for me, I’m the next person to be having their hair done for the charity ball tonight so I’d best be off.

I know it’s only been a week and I really am enjoying my time here, but the next three weeks seem so long to wait to see you. I wish it were only a matter of days.

Please say hello to Polly and Ada for me. I’d love for them to come here too one day if we ever take a trip. Okay, I’d really better start getting ready, you know how long it takes me. I’ve never been good at getting dressed up quickly.

I’ll send you another letter in a couple of days, darling. I hope to see you soon. I love you.

Yours, always, Y/N.

——

Tommy’s eyes lingered on the handwritten paper in his hands long after he’d finished reading it. A hint of sadness sitting in the pit of his stomach, his heart aching at the thought that she’d been holding the very pages that he held now only a matter of hours before.

Tommy hated making her go on a trip with the narcissistic, arrogant prick that was Sir Oswald Mosley for a whole month, though he was given no choice. He had to stay and she had to go, alone.

It was hard convincing her to go, she’d hated the fascist bastard from the moment she set eyes on him. His anti-semetic and racist views were enough to make her feel nauseous, his grimy hands landing on her hips when he insisted they danced the first time they met made her skin crawl.

Tommy had been forced to stay behind, Mosley telling him to give the excuse that he needed to be around for Arthur, which wasn’t entirely a lie, and that there were things he needed to do to help the cause back in London.

“If she doesn’t come along and you don’t stay put then I’ll make sure that all of your family are slaughtered, one by one. Just like little lambs”, Mosley had snickered, knowing that the threat would have hit a nerve.

“And why does my wife have to come along with you? Why can she not stay here with me?” Tommys mind was racing trying to think of any possible reasons before Mosley could muster up a shitty excuse.

“I fear she may become too much of a distraction for you, Mr. Shelby. I need you here in London, getting the biggest names in politics, the socialite world, maybe even Mr. Churchill while you’re at it, to join our cause. I could do it myself of course but I believe you have the right… tactics should I say, to get people on our side. Besides, it’ll be nice to get to know Mrs. Shelby better if we’re to be working alongside each other. I expect we’ll all be spending a lot of time together over the years and I have a feeling that she and Diana will hit it off extremely well. Diana is always looking for new friends.”

There was a glint in Mosley’s eyes that Tommy didn’t like, it was almost unsettling.

“So Mr. Shelby. Do you agree to this or shall I just have someone come and kill your entire family right now?” Mosley took a seat in Tommy’s desk chair, reclining his body back and placing both hands together across his chest.

Tommy thought for a moment, leaning against the wooden panelling on the wall, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it almost on autopilot. He inhaled deeply letting the smoke fill his lungs before slowly releasing it out into the room.

“If I can get the biggest names both in politics and the socialite world, do you agree to keep my wife safe through every endeavour we encounter on this business journey together Mr. Mosley? I’m aware that in business things can always turn sour, especially when politics are involved. I need to know that my wife will always be safe, untouched”, he looked him straight in the eye with every word said, the hue of his blue eyes deepening with the word ‘untouched’.

Of course there were other things he could ask for in return for doing the dirty work, but above all he needed her to be safe. Nothing else mattered if she wasn’t.

As if almost to tease Tommy, Mosley faked a grimace, comically stroking his chin as he pondered on the words just spoken.

“Hmm, I suppose that’s not too much to ask. Rest assured Mr. Shelby, as long as you can get me those names then your wife will be safe throughout our entire journey together”, he finally retorted, standing from the chair and making his way to where Tommy stood, their noses only inches away from one another, ”However, if you do not deliver what you have promised then I can assure you I’ll make sure that she suffers and it’ll be at my own hands. I have no doubt in my mind that I’ll take great pleasure in doing as I please before I finally sink the blade into her chest too”

Tommy felt his chest tighten with the rage that was now enveloping him, his fists began to clench at his sides and he had to take a moment to clear the red mist that was developing over his eyes.

Finally he coughed, clearing his throat, “we have a deal, Mr. Mosley”

“Ah good! Now, tell your wife that she is to be picked up tomorrow morning at eight A.M sharp. A car will arrive at your marital home and she shall be taken to Scotland where she will be greeted ever so delightfully by myself and Diana. We will ensure that she has a wonderful month with us”

A whole month. Just hearing it spoken out loud was enough to make Tommy shiver. The thought of her being practically alone without any of the blinders protection she was used to with a man who couldn’t keep his hands to himself. A man who would have his way with her as and when he pleased no matter who she was married to. It made him feel sick to his stomach.

“I shall see you when I return, Mr. Shelby, and I shall telephone you every week for updates. As for your wife, she may send you letters, all of which will be checked by one of my trusted members of staff before being sent to ensure neither one of you are plotting against me, but that is all. No telephone calls, no visitors from your ‘Peaky boys’ as I’ve heard them be referred to, only letters. Do I make myself clear?”

Tommy could only nod in response. Too afraid at what he might do if he did anything else.

“Good. Oh and by the way, you have two weeks to successfully secure at least three people into our organisation. If you take any longer than that, I’m afraid I shall become angry, and who knows what I’ll do in retaliation”, Mosley gave a sly smirk in Tommy’s direction, “good day, Mr. Shelby”.

Tommy watched as the pompous prick headed for the door, his hand quivering above the gun he had hidden in his pocket. He wanted nothing more than to shoot the bastard right there and then on the spot but what good would that do him?

“FUCK!” He shouted as he heard the footsteps of Mosley growing silent in the distance.

——

She’d pleaded with him that night to not make her go, her eyes visibly glassy and an expression on her face that was enough to make his heart sink. He cupped either side of her face with his hands, gently using his thumbs to stroke her cheeks.

“It’ll make a good impression”, he insisted, “please, love. I need you to go and get all the information you can, I need to know what his real plan is. I know he’s going to try and fuck me over at some point so the sooner I know what he’s up to the better”

His hands moved from her face as he wrapped his arms around her waist. She let her head fall on his chest where they stood, soft cries making her chest wrack up and down. Tommy hated that he had to put her through this especially with Mosley's reputation of not keeping his hands to himself, but he had no choice.

“Sh sh love, it’s okay”, he soothed, stroking the back of her head, her hair so soft and the scent of jasmine drifting towards him as he bent his head down to rest on hers.

“But it’s not, Tommy! You know what Mosley’s like, he’s a pig! He’ll try and fuck me the first chance he gets whether I like it or not and you know it! I’ve seen what he does to other women, seen the way he looks at me, it’s disgusting!” She pushed back from him then, her hands falling to her side with a huff of desperation.

He knew she was right. Fuck, he hated that she was right. What he hated even more was that he couldn’t be there to stop it, to keep that creep as far away from her as possible. Back in Birmingham with the protection of the blinders would be more to his liking.

Tommy took a step towards her, closing the gap between them and brought a finger to her chin, lifting it slightly so that his striking blue eyes met hers, the tears still ever present.

“Y/N, I know this situation isn’t ideal in any fucking possible way, I know that, okay? But I really need you to go, if you don’t then he’s going to go on a killing rampage, all of my family will be dead by the end of tomorrow. Polly, Arthur, Ada, Finn… you”, he paused as he felt a lump form in his throat, trying to hold back the tears he knew were willing to flow.

This time it was her turn to bring her hands up to either side of his face, ready to brush away any tears that might fall. She sighed heavily with the weight of the situation weighing on her chest, why the fuck did she have to go on her own?

“Why can’t you come with me? Why have you got to stay here?”

“You mustn’t tell him I’ve told you this, he’ll retaliate if he knows that I have. He’ll tell you that I’m to get people onboard for our cause, which is true. Another reason I was to use for me not coming is that I need to be here for Arthur. What Mosley won’t tell you is that if you don’t go with him to Scotland, on your own, that he’ll kill the whole family. He made sure to mention that he’d do as he pleased with you too if I didn’t get him at least three major politicians or socialites onboard within two weeks, before taking a blade and killing you himself. I have to get those names, Y/N. If I don’t, I’ll lose you and I can’t let that happen.”

A single tear fell from his eyes then, a sight that was rare when it came to Tommy Shelby.

“Okay, Tom. I’ll go”, she paused briefly, the sadness in his eyes was almost too overwhelming, “I’ll go, but if he lays a single finger on me I won’t hold back, he’ll get every single scratch, kick and punch he deserves”

Tommy chuckled then. That’s my girl, he thought. His hands found themselves on top of Y/N’s as he gently removed them from his face and onto his chest.

“I don’t want you to do anything less, you do what you need to do to stay safe. I’m going to give you a pistol to hide in your undergarments, he touches you and you don’t hesitate to blow his fuckin’ brains out, alright?”

She nodded in agreement, the use of a weapon was something that she was more than accustomed to. Tommy had taught her how to fire her first shot at the age of 8. The pistol his father kept in his dresser along with a few pellets. The weight of the cool metal felt right in her hand even back then which she knew it probably shouldn’t. Maybe she was always destined for this life alongside Tommy Shelby?

“Good, there’s also the issue about contact. He said you’re not to telephone me and no visitors are allowed, only letters which will be checked by his members of staff before they’re sent. We’ve got to find a way to get messages across to each other without anyone noticing”, he took a small step back, lowering his hands down to reach into his pocket and find the carton of cigarettes inside.

He took two out, lit one and handed it to Y/N who was clearly deep in thought as she nearly didn’t notice his outstretched hand and it’s contents. She paced towards the window, cigarette now in her mouth and eyebrows furrowed. It was only when she saw the moon outside the window that it hit her.

“Wait! We’re fucking idiots, this should have been the first thought that came into our heads!” She exclaimed, sounding equally excited and frustrated at their lack of being able to remember the obvious.

“What? What should we have thought of?”, Tommy had moved to sit on the edge of the bed, knees slightly spread apart so that his elbows could rest on either one of them.

“Remember how when we were teenagers and I got sent away that summer cos mum and dad found out we’d slept together?”, she began.

Tommy let out a snicker of laughter that made him exhale sharply out of his nose, a grin appearing on his face, “yeah I remember, I don’t think either of our parents were too pleased with us”

She giggled at the memory, if only their parents had seen that it wasn’t just puppy love that brought the two together.

“Well”, she continued, “We both made the agreement to write each other letters every night when the moon came out with hidden messages inside cos we knew they’d check them, didn’t we? So, why don’t we do that this time too?!”

The grin that spread across her face was enough to make his stomach flip, he loved seeing her look so happy and excited, she was beautiful at all times to Tommy Shelby but something about that smile did things to him.

“You know, I think you may be the true brains in the Shelby family. You’re fucking brilliant”, the smile that was forming on his own face made his eyes crinkle slightly in the corners, his cheekbones showing their true definition.

Y/N made her way over to Tommy and gently straddled his lap, placing a soft kiss on his lips.

“Brains and the beauty you mean?” She joked, taking the cigarette from his fingers and taking a pull, her own cigarette now burnt out.

“Exactly that, Mrs. Shelby”

He took the cigarette back from her, finishing off the last of the tobacco filled contents before stubbing it out in the ashtray next to him.

“There’s one thing I want you to do differently this time though”, he said, a slightly more serious look on his face now.

“Oh? What’s that?”

“I want you to start off the letter with, “Dear Thomas”, if you’re in danger. Only use Tommy if it’s just a normal letter telling me about your time there or if there’s information you think I should know about. I need to make sure you’re safe at all times. The letters you send will arrive to me quickly. Mosley’s got his own messenger boy who will make sure any letters get to the recipient within a few hours. If you’re in danger I’ll be able to create a plan and get to you as quickly as possible. Deal?”

Her face now mimicked the serious look on his as she grasped the gravity of the situation that she was about to go into all over again.

A trip to Scotland with a fascist and his mistress probably wouldn’t sound too awful to anyone with the same mindset as them, but both Y/N and Tommy knew just the kind of things that Sir Oswald Mosley was capable of. They couldn’t take the chances of underestimating him.

“Deal”, she said, nodding her head in agreement.

The air felt heavy around them as they both wrapped their arms around each other, Tommys fingers gripping that extra bit tighter to her frame, too afraid to let go.

——

He’d almost forgotten about their plan when he received the letter, the excitement of seeing words written by the love of his life overwhelming the importance of the contents of it. Snapping himself out of his mindless trance upon finishing the letter, that’s when he noticed it.

‘Dear Thomas…’

“Shit”

Panic set in as he raced his eyes across her words once more, not really taking anything in due to the lack of calm that was now engulfing him.

“Fuck, what’s she fucking hidden in here?!” He said aloud to himself, a hand frantically brushing his hair backwards.

Whiskey. He needed whiskey. That was always something that he believed helped to calm the nerves.

Grabbing the bottle from his desk he quickly poured the amber liquid into the glass next to it, spilling some onto the wooden surface as he did so.

He threw it back just as quickly as he’d poured it and took a deep breath in, exhaling slowly. A lit cigarette now took the place of the whiskey glass in his hand and he made sure to have a long pull on it before focusing his eyes back onto the pages again.

‘Look for the hidden words, look for the fucking hidden words’

‘Dear Thomas…’

His fingers gently swept across the pages trying to make it easier for his eyes to notice any changes in her writing.

“There!” He shouted out loud to no one but himself.

How could he have been so stupid to not notice it before? She’d done exactly what she’d said she’d do, just like she had all those years ago. The hidden words were ever so slightly slanted, only enough for the person reading it to notice if they knew what they were looking for.

Opening the drawer in his desk he pulled out an old notebook and pen and began writing down each tilted word.

‘I need your help. Mosley is losing his patience, he has said he will kill me if you don’t deliver on your part of the deal within the next three days. Please come quickly.

Yours, always, Y/N’

That fucking traitor. He knew that he should have known better than to take Mosley’s word on giving him two weeks to get the names he wanted. The bastard had only been gone for one week and was already tired of keeping up his end of the bargain.

There was no way in fucking hell he was going to let that monster touch his wife, his innocent fucking wife. He knew in his mind ever since the agreement was made that if Mosley so much as grazed her delicate skin with his sinful hands that he’d make sure to cut the weasels fingers off one by one.

He shot up from his chair and ran toward his office door not wanting to waste another second just sitting there, grabbing his coat and peaked cap along the way.

“Frances! I’m going to Scotland for a few days, tell Ada she needs to look after Arthur on her own, she can bring him here if it’s better suited”

The maid stood stuck to the spot as Tommy rushed past her, barely making eye contact on his way across the tiled flooring.

“Yes Mr. Shelby”

He wasted no time in getting into his car, fumbling with his keys as he tried to get them into the ignition. The engine started up and his foot was down on the accelerator faster than a racehorse on a track, causing the car to go speeding off down the long driveway out of Arrow House. His heart pounding with every metre of ground covered.

The phone in Tommy’s office began to ring, each chime of the bell reverberating around the room. Frances made her way through the already open door that Tommy had failed to close on his way out and over to his desk, taking the phone off the receiver and placing it to her ear.

“Arrow House”, she stated.

Had Tommy only waited a few minutes more, he might’ve been the one to answer and hear the words that would change everything.

“Hello, this is Sir Oswald Mosley. I regret to inform you that I have something unfortunate to tell you about Mr. Shelby’s wife…”

——

Thank you for reading, I hope you liked the element of a hidden message within the letter! It was something that I was so excited to include in this fic and the basis of the whole story idea, it was so much fun trying to find ways to include all of the words I needed to!

Please let me know your thoughts via likes, reblogs, comments and/or asks! It really does make a writers day when a reader lets us know what they thought of our work❤️

If you’d like to join my tag list to keep up to date with my work, please click here

Tagged: @peakypoet @moral-terpitude @lyarr24 @cillmequick @mrkdvidal1989 @shelbydelrey @alasya16 @tommystargirl @elenavampire21 @adaydreamaway08 @slaypussypop-21 (unable to tag) @bluesongbird @zablife

#tommy shelby #peaky blinders #tommy shelby imagine #tommy shelby x reader #tommy shelby x y/n #tommy shelby one shot #tommy shelby x you #tommy shelby fanfic #cillian murphy

[the1975attheirverybest]

just could really use something where maybe ur anxious and crying or whatever it may be for whatever reason and matty just holds u and runs his hands through your hair and whispers sweet nothings and affirmations IDK i just feel kinda shit rn ig

Oh, honey. I’m so sorry you’re having a difficult time right now. Please know that it will pass. Even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. I am sending you all the best vibes and well wishes. I’m here for you, if you need to vent or chat or anything at all. Been there myself. More times than I can count. So, I completely understand. ❤️ I hope that this can at least bring a smile to your face.

——

Matty walked through the door, expecting to be greeted with a hug from his favorite human being, after a long day at work. He kicked his shoes off, glancing around the room for signs of her. His brows furrow at the eerie silence. He’s used to the speakers blasting music, the sounds and smells of her cooking, or the TV being on, at the very least. This quiet was unsettling.

He rushes up the stairs, whistling the tune of the song he’s been working on all day. He peaks his head into the bedroom and smiles when his eyes finally land on her figure.

“Hey, baby! What’re you doin’ up here so early?” He walks over, a bit concerned that she doesn’t turn around to look at him as soon as he shows up. “Hey, you sleepin’ or something?”

She eventually pulls herself up and turns to face him, mumbling a soft apology. “Sorry, I- umm, just didn’t hear you come in.”

Matty is alarmed. How could she not have heard him come in, walk up the stairs, and all the way to the bedroom? He sits by her on the bed, taking her face in his hands and looking her straight in the eyes. Which is when it dawns on him that she’s on the verge of tears.

“Hey, honey, what’s the matter, my love?”

She bites her wobbly lip, struggling to keep from crying. All the effort that she had put into shoving her anxious thoughts into the back of her mind, and all the energy that she had spent telling herself to power through the hard part, and to just be strong for one more day, was now washing away at the sound of his gentle coaxing pulling at her heartstrings.

She shakes her head and attempts to brush him off, but Matty will not hear of it. He can tell she’s upset, and his heart is breaking at the tears in her eyes. “Baby, please talk to me. What’s the matter?” His hand on her neck and bottom of her cheek, pulls her into him, and she can no longer keep the tears at bay. She sobs into his arms, with him holding her tight, and vents to him while his shirt soaks up her tears, about how awful she’s been feeling for a long time now. That she feels stuck and helpless with her mind spiraling all the time. It feels like the world around her is moving at warp speed, and she has to exert twice as much energy just to try and keep up, and most of the time, she can’t even do that. And she feels guilty for even being upset because she knows she’s supposed to be stronger than this, but she’s just so exhausted all the time.

Matty listens to her speak and feels the sobs shake her whole body as they leave her lips and his heart shatters to a million pieces. “Baby, why haven’t you said anything? I wish you’d talked to me…if I’d known that you’ve been feeling this way- fuck, I never would’ve left for work this morning.” He hates to imagine that while he slept soundly by her side every night, she’s been lying awake struggling in anguish without his support.

He pulls them both into the bed so he’s resting his back against the headboard, with her in his lap, stroking her hair, kissing her forehead and cooing to her. “It’s okay, my love. I’ve got you. You’re not alone. Don’t have to be strong anymore. You can fall apart if you need to. I’ll catch you, I’ll put you back together.”

She falls asleep with him holding her, and he’s there in the morning when she tries to pretend everything’s fine and start her day anew.

“You need to rest. You can’t fix your situation if you’re running on fumes.”

“But life doesn’t pause and wait for me. If I don’t get on with it, I’ll fall behind. It’ll be even worse!” She feels the emotions bubble back up to the surface, but she doesn’t have time for this right now. She’s a grown up, with real responsibilities, and no time for outbursts.

“Fuck that shit! I couldn’t give a rats ass about the rest of the world. What I care about is you. My love. My favorite person. Everyone else could set themselves on fire for all I care. If you’re not healthy, how could you be expected to get anything done?” He puts his hands on both of her shoulders, dragging her back to bed. “Please. Stay here with me. Just for today. Let me spoil you. Let me take care of you. We’ll have a day in. Just us. I wanna talk. Feel like I haven’t been present. I wanna know what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours. If all you need is some rest, we’ll make sure you get it. If you need professional help, I want to make sure you have it. Please, baby, stay home with me.”

And how could she refuse. When he looks at her with his pretty eyes and she sees the concern that fills them, she knows he’s right. And at least for the moment, the burden isn’t as heavy. Knowing that he would gladly carry it with her is the first glimmer of hope she’s felt in a long time.

#matty healy #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy x reader #matty healy x y/n #matty healy fanfic #matty healy x you #matty healy fluff

[sarahmadpeople]

A sight for sore eyes

Summary: One of Chicago Med’s finest doctors is back and reunited with his favourite person.

Pairing: Connor Rhodes x Reader, Connor Rhodes x Halstead!Sister Reader

Characters: Halstead!Sister Reader, Connor Rhodes, Will Halstead (mentioned)

Tags: fluff, reunion

Warnings: none (just pure fluff)

Word count: 683

Disclaimer: i don’t own any of the characters and this is purely fiction ~

a/n: back with another chicago med fic and it’s one of my shortest fic >< this is one of the ways I imagined Connor coming back to Chicago,, sorry for any mistakes and enjoyy ~~

Masterlist

~

��Room for one more?” A voice so familiar rang through my ears. A voice I’ve wished so many times to hear other than through the phone. I looked up and my eyes got misty. All the air seemed to have sucked out from my lungs as I took in the sight in front of me.

Standing gloriously a few feet away was Connor. Connor Rhodes.

Connor, who left because traumatising things happened one after another and he needed a break from the city. Connor, who left, leaving a distraught girlfriend back in Chicago, threading life with little to no support, what with her boyfriend being in another city, her older brother leaving and her other older brother being so close to losing it with whatever’s been happening in his life, the not-so recent building apartment fire flashed by in her mind. God, I nearly lost Will, lost my brother.

“Mind if I sit with you?” Connor’s voice once again brought me back from my thoughts.

“Connor,” I managed to utter because if I were to say anything else, the flood works would come. Connor took it as an invitation to sit next to me, on the bench outside the hospital overlooking a park nearby.

“You’re back,” I said as I looked at him, cataloging every feature of his face. I’ve missed this so much. It’s been almost a year since he left and that one year was downright a crazy year.

Connor chuckled and let out a soft but bright smile that never failed to spread warmth all over me, “I’m back, babe. For good.” Connor reached his arm and pulled towards him. The moment I was attached to him in a sort of a side hug, I sagged and melted into him.

I took in the smell of his cologne, one that I’ve been trying to keep up with over the year, because this man didn’t think through his decision of leaving at least his cologne so I could remember his smell.

I wrapped my arms around him and it took no more than a few seconds for me to start crying. I can’t believe that he is really here, beside me, that it is his arms that’s finally wrapped around me.

Connor didn’t say anything, just held me tighter and occasionally rubbed his hand up and down my arm to comfort me.

“I’m sorry babe, that you had to go through everything alone. I’m here now, we’ll get through whatever together, all right,” Connor was no stranger to my life even after he left Chicago. Every single night I’d text or call him to give life updates but it was one thing to be a listening ear miles away and another to be physically there to support you.

“I’m never leaving you again and if I have to get away from here, I’ll bring you with me,” he said, tone suggesting that he’s making a promise.

I nodded, not trusting myself to say anything yet although the tears have stopped. I rested my head on his shoulder and took a deep breath in.

“Glad you came back, babe. I know it’s hard for you too, this place doesn’t really give you a lot of good memories, and I’m sorry for not being there for you too,” I started after a stretch of silence.

“It’s okay, maybe the happy memories are not much but it’s enough and I think I’m open to the idea of making more since my favourite person is still here. What’d you think?” I turned my head to see him looking at me. I nodded.

“I love you, Connor Rhodes, thanks for coming back,” I hugged him tighter and felt his arms hugging me back. “I love you too,” Connor kissed the top of my head.

“Do you need to go back in anytime soon?” I heard him ask. I shook my head, my shift was already over but I wasn’t ready to go back to an empty apartment, not after the day I had. But now that my home is here, “Let’s go back, my shift’s over.”

~

thanks for readingg!! ❤️

#chicago med #chicago med imagines #chicago med x reader #connor rhodes x reader #connor rhodes x halstead!reader #halstead!reader #halstead!sister #connor rhodes #will halstead #fluff #one chicago

[chelseeebe]

i’ve never been more in love.

read part two here.

summary: you’re finally off to college, but is leaving the love of your life practically on the other side of the country worth it? 

this is like a continuation to still don’t know my name, but it’s also not at all necessary to read that before this one. i think there’ll be another part to this story. still deciding if i want it angsty or full of fluff like this one hehe. this one is also a smidge smutty 

‘hello?’ your boyfriends gruff voice echoes out of the pay phone. it was a saturday evening, but you weren’t shocked that he was home rather than out with friends. they’d seemed to have all dwindled after high school.

‘hey, handsome, i had a spare minute so i thought i’d give you a call, how are you?’

‘oh, baby! i’m so good now, how are you? it’s so great to hear your voice.’ steve replies, there’s a sadness to his voice. there always is when you call.

‘i’m good, i’m so tired though, these classes are taking it out of me.’ although it was true, you didn’t want to tell steve just how much you were loving it here. he was back in hawkins, working at his dad’s company while he figured out what he wanted to really do.

‘are you sleeping properly? make sure you’re not overworking yourself, i need you on top form over the holidays, i’ve got so much planned.’ he gabbled back down the phone. he always worried too much about you.

‘i’m not, i promise, i’m going straight to bed after this.’ eh, not true. you and your roommate amy were actually gonna go and check out a new bar that had opened downtown after you finished up with steve. you just thought it so much easier to tell steve a little white lie than have him worry himself all night about you.

‘that’s my girl. i can’t wait to see you.’ you smile, you couldn’t wait to see him either but you knew that while he was wishing the days away, you were hoping they’d slow down just a little. exam season was nigh and you felt like you were already ten months behind everybody else.

it made it a hundred times worse that you’d decided to skip going home for thanksgiving, choosing to study and save the plane ticket money home on an extra special christmas present for steve. he was prepared to drive the 17 hour journey just to come and get you. you had to physically beg him not to. ‘i swear to god if i see you in colorado, i’ll murder you myself. please don’t, i’ll be just fine here, god knows i need the time to study,’ you pleaded with him.

‘just a few more weeks, my love,’ amy appears in the doorway, ready to leave, you make eye contact and nod. ‘look, i have to go but i’ll call you on monday and you can tell me exactly what you’ve got planned for me, okay? i love you.’

‘okay… i love you. speak to you on monday.’ every time you had to end the call, your heart shattered. he sounded so disappointed, he just wanted to speak to you forever.

you sigh and place the headset back on the wall, turning to face amy.

‘you okay?’ she questions, she knows everything about steve; the strange story of how you two got together, about how you’d practically ruined his status and how sad he was about being left behind when everyone else had seemingly moved on.

your best friend robin had gone to a prestige art college in california, it was the perfect choice for her. but in doing so, your friendship had taken a bit of a backseat. you missed her dearly, but you knew that this was a necessary part in her becoming the most successful version of herself. besides, amy had become a close second, and you were sure steve had allotted some time for you to see your best friend over christmas.

you nod and press a smile, ‘i’m great, i just.. i know that he’s not, and then, that makes me not so great.’ you link your arm with hers as you walk down the hallway.

‘he’ll be okay, y/n. it’s just gonna take a bit more getting used to but he’ll be fine.’ she reassured you. you’d only know the blonde for a couple of months but she had already become such a close confident to you.

-

steve was waiting on your doorstep as your mom pulled up onto the drive. he’d probably been stood there from the minute he’d finished work earlier this afternoon.

you spring out of the car and over to him, he lifts you up into a hug, spinning you around in the process.

you laugh, you really had missed him. he looks up to you, kissing your lips and then your cheeks, finally placing a kiss on your red nose. it was much colder in indiana than colorado, you can feel the cold air sting your cheeks.

‘i’ve missed you so much,’ his grip tightens around your waist as he plants you onto the floor, his nose resting on the top of your hair, ‘almost too much.’

‘i’ve missed you too, baby.’ you pull away to look up at him and smile, this was the first time in months that he was genuinely this happy. just so content with being with you.

he pulls away from you to go and help your mom get your comically large suitcase out of the car. it was an absolute bastard to fly with but it was necessary. you were home for three whole weeks with an assortment of activities planned for you by steve who knows what you needed to wear.

he drags it into the house and even all the way into your bedroom for you. collapsing onto your bed with a sigh.

you fall next to him, exhausted from the early morning flight you’d taken.

he grabs your hand, remembering the night he climbed through your window absolutely hammered. that was the night that started this all, well if you don’t include the halloween party at vickie’s.

you look over to him, he looks so peaceful. for the first time in months, he’d felt calm, like he was finally at home.

his eyes are staring back at you when he rolls on top of you, holding himself up with his elbow and places a kiss on your lips. his kiss is hungry, my god didn’t you know it. you could already feel his erection digging into your thigh.

‘’my mom.. downstairs..’ you mumble through the kiss. you wanted him too but you knew your mom was downstairs preparing your favourite dinner and you felt awful knowing she might just hear you too.

‘mmm be quiet then,’ he whispers against your cheek, leaving sloppy kisses down onto your jaw, nibbling slightly all the way down to your collarbone.

you nod, you’d probably have to gag him to make him quiet but you couldn’t stop now. his hand had already made its way to your jean button, tugging them down past your knees and onto the floor.

his kisses now onto your exposed stomach. he pulls your red, lacy panties down to your thighs. leaving soft kisses to the inside of your thighs.

he hoists your legs over his shoulders, dangling off of your bed. your fingers weave into his soft hair, lightly pulling on the brown locks.

‘i’ve missed you,’ he growls between your legs, ‘so,’ kiss, ‘so,’ kiss, ‘much.’

you let out a breathy moan, his lips kissing your nub.

his tongue slides between your folds, his arm wrapping around your thigh to spread you further apart.

your eyes are firmly shut, teeth dug into your bottom lip in an attempt to muffle any moans.

steve’s tongue is circling around your clit, performing wonders on your pussy.

‘fuck… steve,’ you groan, his hand slides up to your breast, giving it a slight squeeze. his fore finger playing with your already erect nipple. 

‘quiet..’ the words vibrate against your clit, his tongue gets back to work, licking up and down your soaked folds.

he dares to toy with your entrance, making you clamp your thighs firmly around his face.

that familiar pressure building up in your core. you’d only dared to touch yourself a handful of times, and only when you knew amy was going to be out of the dorm indefinitely. to feel this again, and from steve’s mouth was euphoria to you.

‘i-i’m gonna cum… fuck..’ the words catch in your throat as steve takes this as his opportunity to fasten the pattern he was making on your clit.

your thighs squeeze his reddened cheeks as your back arches and you reach the sweet high of your orgasm.

the sheer pleasure making your legs shake as steve does not let up.

‘fuuuck,’ probably far too loud.

he escapes from your legs, his mouth wet with your juices and comes up to meet your face, legs still hanging over his shoulders. he’s waisting absolutely no time, already unzipping his jeans and yanking them down.

his kiss is messy, but sweet and you can taste yourself on his lips.

his clothed length pressing against your soaked entrance.

you glance at your door making sure your unknowing mother was still downstairs. you knew this was going to last all of about 2 minutes as the worry subsided slightly.

his boxers are barely off before he’s sliding into you, a deep groan escaping his glistening lips.

you kiss him quickly, that way you know he’s going to have to stay quiet.

he pumps into you, his pace fastening and the unmistakable sounds of skin slapping skin fill them room. your legs above his shoulders made everything feel a thousand times more powerful.

‘you feel.. so fucking good.. shit..’ his forehead pressed against yours now, kisses only worsening the speed in which he was going to explode.

you fuck back against his hips, whining into his ear, ‘cum for me, baby..’ you knew how to get his exactly where you wanted him.

‘aahhh fuck..’ his pace dying off as he shudders above you, emptying inside of you.

his body collapsing on top of yours, slick with sweat, chest heaving.

‘fuck, i’ve missed you.’

you giggle at him, ‘i can tell, big boy.’ yours arms wrap around him, rolling him off of you and onto the bed.

‘you wait, that was just the warmup, i’m only getting started, baby.’ he smiles back at you. this was the steve you’d fallen in love with, not the glum voice on the end of the phone.

you sniff, smelling the familiar aroma of spaghetti bolognese downstairs.

‘i think you’ll have to put that thought on hold, dinners ready.’ his arms are wrapped firmly around your waist, not wanting to let you go just yet.

-

the holidays were passing far too quickly, steve’s list of activities only getting smaller with each day.

it was christmas eve, the usual ritual of watching whatever festive crap was on television with your mom was interrupted, with steve now sitting beside you on your old couch instead. neither you nor your mom minded, in fact you both loved it.

he’d been going to see her while you were away, making sure she was okay and didn’t need anything. it was also a chance to sort of see you again, her walls were littered with pictures of you. in school, at proms, when you were only a small girl and now a special photo of you and steve at your graduation. that one meant the most to him.

you knew that steve didn’t have the best home life, the relationship with his parents was.. strained to say the least. he appreciated his dad for giving him a job, but knew that every time his father looked at him, his eyes were full of disappointment at what his son could have been.

they’d actually decided to go away for christmas this year, to some fancy hotel in new york. even if steve had been invited he wouldn’t have gone, not wanting to miss a single second with you.

‘oh my god, what is this lovey-dovey crap,’ you moan, there’s some old film about two people falling in love at christmas on the screen.

‘hey, i think it’s cute.’ he squeezes your hand, nudging you from beneath.

your mom smiles over at the two of you, she really did love having steve around and had actually asked him to stay before you had. the only condition being that he must call his parents on christmas day, even just to say hello.

‘i think i’m gonna hit the hay, don’t want to be awake when santa comes tonight, do we?’ your mother announces, standing from her spot on the couch.

you roll your eyes and shoot her a grin, ‘of course not mother, goodnight.’

steve laughs and you can feel his chest vibrate underneath your head, ‘goodnight, y/m/n.’

she trundles off up the stairs.

you can feel steve’s arm tighten around you, pulling you as close as humanly possibly.

‘she’s got you a stocking, y’know?’

‘really?’ his mouth is open, you’d think he was mocking you if you weren’t aware of his home life.

you nod, turning your body to look at him.

‘i’ve never had one before.. my mom said they were a waste of time…’ he trails off, the little boy inside of him sounding incredibly mournful.

‘well.. now you do,’ tracing circles on his hand, “i actually, i wanted to give you my present.. just the two of us.’ you stand up, walking over to the brightly lit tree in the corner of the room.

‘and no you perv, it’s not something sexy. i just wanted it to be special, between us.’ you pick out the box and make your way over to your boyfriend who has now sat up on the couch. being truthful, steve had thought it was a new piece of lingerie for you both to enjoy.

you hand it to him, placing yourself down on the carpet besides the couch.

your boyfriend unwraps it agonisingly slow, wanting to savour this moment with you.

it was a nikon camera.

he’s slightly puzzled, but so appreciative nonetheless.

‘right, i know it seems weird but i just had a. thought.. i want you to use this to take pictures of whatever you’re doing. whenever you feel happy, or sad or you miss me or whatever. take a picture and then send them to me, like every week or every month or something..’

he smiles at you, lifting your chin up and planting a tender kiss to your lips, ‘i love it, i really do.’

‘i just.. i want you to feel included in my life and me in yours, and if we have to go months without seeing each other then this way i still get to see you regularly.’ you smile back at him, the plane ticket you’d skipped out had been so worth it to see him smile in this moment, so utterly in love with you.

there was no doubt this was the most thoughtful gift anyone had ever gotten steve, and the fact it was from you made it all the better.

his eyes were twinkling in the glow of the tv, ‘do you want my present now?’

‘well, if you insist,’ you shrug, knowing you really did want to open it now, a special moment just the two of you.

he stands up to retrieve the carefully wrapped box. sitting back down on the couch.

you lift off the lid to reveal a carbon copy of your favourite sweater of his. you’d wanted to take it to college but knew it’d eventually lose the smell of him so decided against it.

you notice the red thread on the chest of the sweater, fingers trace over embroidery. he’d sewn, slightly askew, your initials next to sh and small heart.

‘you did this?’ tears swell in your eyes, the fact he’d taken his time to learn to embroider just for you, on your favourite sweater of his.

‘yeah.. i asked your mom just to teach me the basics.. though i did stab myself a fair few times,’ he holds his hands, ‘i wanted you to have it, i know it’s your favourite.’

‘steveee,’ you throw your arms around him and let out a combination between a sob and a laugh.

‘oh baby, don’t cry.. it’s only a sweater..’ he’s hugging you back, his big hands pulling you up to sit on the couch next to him.

‘no it’s not,’ you wail, ‘steve, i love you so much, i don’t think you understand how much this means to me.. i’ve missed you so much.’

he wipes the tears off of your sodden cheeks, ‘it’s okay baby, now i’ll always be there with you and you’ll be here with me.’

you sigh, nuzzling into his chest. you already knew going back to college was going to be the hardest moment of your life.

-

christmas had passed, steve having arguably the best christmas day of his life. so full of love and joy, something his home had been void of for decades.

he’d also gotten you and bottle of his cologne, for spraying on the sweater and what seemed like a hundred dollars worth of quarters for the pay phone. he knew you weren’t allowed to have a personal phone in your dorm so this was the next best thing.

you’d gifted him some vinyls of bands that he liked and a saucy picture of yourself you’d taken on his camera before wrapping it up. you’d slid the picture in between one of the vinyls in hopes that he’d discover it a few weeks later when you were back. but your boyfriend is extremely impatient, wanting to play the vinyls upstairs in your bedroom that evening.

it was now new year’s eve, both dressed up and just about ready to enter the house that had bought you too together.

vickie swings open the door, your ginger best friend in tow.

‘y/n!’ she screeches, lunging for you. the hug lasted longer than probably necessary but it was so so lovely.

the party booms on as you catch up with your best friend and her new girl friend. steve occasionally joining in on whatever gossip you were chattering about.

he was a bit uncomfortable, what with being around the very people that had ostracised him during his final few months of his high school life. everyone had appeared to have matured since then, which stung even more. they’d all had the opportunity to leave the small town and become the people they were truly destined to be, while he was stuck in hawkins.

the countdown rolls around and you’re stood in the crowded living room, steve’s hands on the small of you waist, his forehead flush against yours.

‘five!’ you smile at him.

‘four!’

‘three!’

‘two!’

‘one!’

the crowd cheered, but you could have sworn it was only you and steve in the room.

‘happy new year, baby,’ he whispers before kissing your lips lovingly. you both longed for this moment to never come to an end. it was perfect.

‘god, i’m so in love with you,’ you mumble back to him, your eyes not leaving his. his smile had already reached his eyes. he kisses you again, his thumbs on your cheeks, tracing along your smile lines. 

he didn’t need to tell you it back, you already knew. this boy had never been more in love and it was evident in the things he did for you, the way he loved you. it was unlike anything you both had ever experienced before. 

the night ended with the two of you giggling, trying to undress each other, slightly tipsy in your childhood bedroom.

the feeling of dread, knowing that in only three short days you were going back to college until god knows when, only hitting you when steve was fast asleep, lightly snoring on your chest, your trembling fingers sliding through his hair.

-

the drive to the airport was excruciating, steve had offered to drive you to ‘save your mom the trip.’

he was trying to milk every single second possible he had with you.

the car ride was silent, neither of you could bare to put the radio on. skipping your usual car sing-a-longs.

you’d put on the sweater he’d gifted to you, not that you hadn’t been wearing it for the past week solid. his thumb tracing across your knee, the thought of doing this however many more times over the next three years was gut wrenching.

at the gate, steve had clung to you, not yet willing to let you go. he wasn’t ready to only hear your voice through a crackly pay phone for the next few months.

‘i need to go, stevie or i’ll miss my flight..’

‘just miss it, one more day won’t hurt..’ he gulped. but it would hurt just as much, only prolonging the inevitable hurt.

‘i can’t baby..’ you pull away from him, eyes full of tears, ‘i’ll call you as soon as i get in, i promise.’

his eyes were shiny, eyelids slicked together with salty tears.

‘i love you. so so much. call me as soon as you land, okay?’

you nod, another word and you’d be sobbing in indianapolis international airport.

‘i love you,’ you choke as you fully let go of your sweet boyfriend.

you walk towards the flight assistant, waving back at steve. he looked like a lost little boy stood there on his own, waving frantically back at you.

‘i love you!’ he screamed, only making you laugh through the tears as you headed onto your plane.

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