#i love smart dumbasses

[alpacacare-archive]

#what can i even add to this #tf2 #tf2 medic #tf2 heavy #tf2 scout #tf2 demoman #tf2 sniper #tf2 engineer #tf2 pyro #sorry for tagging all of them i dont want anyone to feel left out #this stupid idea plagued and haunted me and it would not let me rest until i spent half of my day off drawing it #u decide if he actually fucks or not #who cares #^happened before medic and heavy started.. *looks around* ... holding hands. #suggestive #cw suggestive #i love smart dumbasses

[ew-selfish-art]

DpxDc AU: Tim as a child was never given a lot of information regarding the scribbling messy handwriting that appeared over night all over his arms- naturally he came to his own conclusions.

Tim Drake was home entirely alone at 9 years old and was about to go out for the night to test his brand new long exposure camera lens when he sees the writing on his arm. It’s not English, like he assumed it was at first, but it was using the alphabet to represent… Tim isn’t bad at math but this formula is complex for his little genius brain.

Looking at his camera, he decides he can spare a moment to look it up, solve it, and get back out into old town Gotham in time for Batman and Robin’s final patrol lap. He does just that, finding the problem to relate to some aerospace engineering and then quickly deduces what laws and theorems need to be applied. He finds a pen, writes down his findings in much neater handwriting onto his arm, and goes out. It’s barely a remarkable night at all. He gets a much more memorable photo of Robin roundhouse kicking a hench person.

Things just continued on that way. Tim would find some complex math, physics or chemistry prompt on his arm (surrounded by various question marks or notes or sad faces)- he’d answer it as best he could and move on with his life. Perhaps his parents were manifesting these pop quizzes? Perhaps his subconscious felt guilty about abandoning his studies for more Bat related pursuits? Tim really didn’t care to think much about it once he became Robin- there was too much on his plate and too many peoples problems for him to fix.

Notably, however, after the attack at the Tower, the pop quiz appeared and Tim wrote back that he wouldn’t be able to find an answer to this one. It was the only time Tim questioned the markings appearance and it was because the next thing that appeared was “Hope you feel better soon.”

… his parents wouldn’t include that on a pop quiz. Cursed then. Tim decided it must be a curse, whatever, he’d deal with the implications later in life.

Tim then has the worst year of his life, hes 15, no longer Robin and the questions from his curse are getting less math oriented and more… philosophical. A lot of mentions of death that, in hindsight helped him actually grieve, and a lot of theories about dark matter and souls. Tim answers back as best he can but he’s drained and his answers aren’t very good in his opinion. He gets minimal feedback.

It all comes to a point that he’s at a family dinner, Bruce is at the head of the table, Jason has promised just to stay for dessert, Damian hasn’t thrown a single insult his way and Steph was laughing at him- when a new theoretical model appears on his arm.

“You’re just as bad as Bruce, Timberly. Hiding a soulmate from all of us, how fucking typical.” Jason points out, while watching Tim scribble back some math with a question mark onto his arm.

“A what? No, this is just a curse. I get pop quizzes every now and then.” Tim bats away Steph who rapidly approaches and began to analyze his arm (the rest of the family isn’t far behind).

“Drake. Explain how you came to this conclusion.” Damian seems more curious than anything, if his lack of insults was anything to go off of.

“Since I was young I’ve had at least weekly math check ins, I never had a parent or anyone else around so I assumed my parents had me cursed to ensure I stayed on top of my studies. Sometimes it’s physics or chemistry, for a while there it was a ton of philosophy and behavioral psychology.” He shrugs his shoulders.

“Master Tim, I believe the lack of adults in your life has led you towards a false conclusion. That is most certainly a soulmate mark. The individual to whom you are responding is undoubtedly your other half.” Alfred attempts to calm the room before explaining to Tim. Tim isnt sure if he believes the butler, though Alfred only very rarely lied, so he grabs the pen once more. He writes his first question back: “Who am I to you?”

The room waits in anticipation and within moments a brand new line appears on Tim’s arm and he is vindicated: “We do math together???”

——

The reason Danny is failing English is because his built in homework helper sucks ass at metaphors and has apparently never read any classic literature. The tutor on his arm is great at puzzles and math tho.

Danny gets a reply back one night that he wasn’t expecting (Who am I to you?) and he mentions it to Jazz. Who goes insane that Danny didn’t even question it and just went with “meh, probably haunted” as his explanation for the phenomenon for all these years.

Apparently, if Jazz was right, he had a soulmate who was uh, super fucking smart. That was an overwhelming thought.

The next day Danny is in crisis mode and writes back “Wait, WHAT AM I TO YOU??? Can I help on your homework??”

Danny gets vindicated when the writing on his arm presents a shit ton of dates and information for an unsolved Gotham cold case. See, Haunted.

———

Eventually between Danny becoming the top candidate for astrophysics at Wayne Enterprises and Tim Drake being outed as having contributed tips to the GCPD that solved cold cases- they meet and realize just how dumb they’ve been.

#dcxdp #dpxdc #dc x dp #dp x dc #danny phantom #dc crossover #dp crossover #long post #braindead ship #brain dead #deadtired ship #tim x danny #soulmate au #soulmate marks #I feel like I really cooked something here #two super smart total dumbasses #in my head then then fall in love and try to pretend that they’ve known this whole time lmao #Tim looks at college level physics questions on his arms as a kid and is like ‘must be a pop quiz’ and then solves them #danny just thinks it looks neat at first but then his haunted arm replies back with actual answers and explanations??? #your honor these two meet in person realize that they are literally soulmates admit no fault and carry on like they’ve always been in love #tim is naturally paranoid and Danny is naturally curious so tim always answers and Danny always asks

[mathes0n]

My partner asked me to draw evil Wheatley

#Wheatley #glados #chell portal #portal 2 #mathes0nart #giving him this cool tech android villain design is so cool and awesome #but what if he dressed like an evil oil baron #what if he googled ‘smart handsome guy’ and raided glados’s private butch collection to dress the part #I can’t emphasize how much I love this man and how it’s so important to me that he’s so stupid #dumbass rep

[thelesbiandeli]

Pete… Sweetie… Thats not what football looks like….

#I love him he’s such a smart dumbass #peter spankoffski #stephanie lauter #nerdy prudes must die #hatchetfield #hatchetverse #starkid #if i loved you #deli.chats

[cer-es]

y’all.. it’s them

#as smart as they all are….somehow they’re also dumbasses #they get up to SO much trouble even when they don’t mean to #actually it’s especially when they don’t mean to #and cody’s the one who’s got to bail them out of shit like the parent that he is #cody i love you thank you for all that you do #obi wan kenobi #captain rex #anakin skywalker #rex and ahsoka #ahsoka tano #anakin and ahsoka #obi wan and anakin #rex and anakin #rex and obi wan #star wars #rex #commander cody

[cerise-on-top]

hi :D if you do character x character (with possibly x reader, too) headcanons, may i request nikprice hcs? aghh.. i love them so much, but there's (in my opinion) little content of them compared to other ships.. if you do have to add reader into it too thats okay :) i don't mind poly (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

but besides that how are you doing? i hope youre doing good :]

Hey there! I'm doing well, thank you! I've actually got five days off next week, which I'm really looking forward to! Plus I get to go to my regular department again too soon enough! But unfortunately, the other apprentice left me with so much work ^^;

NikPrice and NikPrice x Reader

NikPrice:

Although the two of them may be a bit older than some of their peers, they can still be considered idiots, especially when they’re with one another. Sometimes they get weirdly competitive with each other, which can result in either of them getting hurt. Nikolai leads Chimera and Price leads the TF141, both of them sometimes need to show off just how good they are at some things. Nikolai is usually a pretty calm guy, but he does get a bit cocky with Price, so he’ll instigate some competitions. Who can carry the most groceries. Who can find the most dogs and take pictures with them. Who will be favored the most for the week among their boys. It’s just dumb things, and Nikolai does try to cheat his way through most of them, but Price knows him well enough by now to know how he will try to weasel his way into victory. Price usually plays fair and forces Nikolai to do the same. The winner gets bragging rights and that’s about it. Sometimes they poker on who pays for dinner, but they don’t really mess around too much when it comes to more serious stuff. However, they both also compete with each other to show off just how good of a partner they are, even if there’s no need to do that anymore. They can both be proud as peacocks and always need to outdo one another.

Although it may sound stupid, the two of them do spar with each other from time to time. Since they’re about equal in strength it’s actually quite interesting to watch the two of them fight, both have a pretty good technique as well. However, Nikolai has more experience under his belt since he’s quite a bit older than Price. Again, he’s also not above cheating by trying to entice Price with just about anything he can think of. They’re adults, they’re leaders, but they are still morons with each other. Sometimes they fight over the TV remote when Price wants to watch his football game and Nikolai wants to tease him. Price gets mad every time he misses the football game just because he lost to his stupid lover. Nikolai gets a good laugh out of it every time. Although he may love Price more than anyone else, he can be a playful and cocky bastard at times. He makes up for it by taking Price to a real football game in a stadium, though. Can’t enrage the boyfriend too much all the time. Price is usually overjoyed when he does since he gets really into it. There’s nothing better than enjoying some football with Nikolai. Unless Nikolai teases Price about his team losing. In that case the two of them won’t be talking more than necessary for an hour. However, Price goes back to normal after the initial anger of his team losing has worn off.

Nikolai is actually a chef of the master class. He can cook just about anything and make it well at that too. Since he’s been pretty much everywhere at this point he’s learned quite a few recipes from all around the world. He also knows how to use his spices well. Though, his favorite recipes to make are still Russian ones. The two of them cook together often, it relaxes them. Besides, Price gets the privilege of eating Nikolai’s pirozhki before anyone else does. It’s an honor to him since he’s never had anything better in his life. Loves being Nikolai’s taste tester as well. Price isn’t as good a cook as Nikolai, but he does like showing his appreciation for all the good food by cooking something in return. However, his food is kind of bland. It could be worse, but it could also use a lot more spices. Nikolai used to tease Price about that before, but he’s stopped since as Price really does put a lot of effort into cooking for Nikolai. The latter really isn’t so mean to genuinely hurt his boyfriend like that. He does give Price some constructive criticism, though. Offers to help with cooking next time, but both of them know that Nikolai will just take the lead. But in the end, they both really do enjoy cooking with each other, regardless of who makes the main dish. They also get really chatty during it.

NikPrice x Reader

Considering how long they’ve been with each other, they've gotten used to it, but you genuinely cannot cuddle them during summer. You’ll become a sweaty mess and won’t be able to sleep at all since they’re both very warm. Nikolai more so than Price. However, the two of them can cuddle each other just fine since they’re used to warmer nights because of all the missions they’ve gone on. However, it’s pretty nice in winter. They’re two big, burly and warm men who love to make you feel toasty. Price is actually a pretty cuddly guy and Nikolai can be too with the right people. If you’re not on the cuddly side then they’ll settle for giving you a pat on the back every once in a while or just holding your hand. But Price loves touching you and Nikolai. He doesn’t need to do it every single waking moment, but it’s nice to hold your loved ones. Nikolai can go either way, but he’s pretty cuddly with Price. Sometimes the two of them fight over who gets to be the big spoon, other times they’ll just plop into each other’s arms. If you’re shorter than them then you’ll likely get sandwiched between them. If you’re as tall or taller than them then they might ask you to take on the role of big spoon. Sure, they won’t mind it when you’re shorter than them, but they’ll chuckle since you’re just a little backpack.

Both of them will try to teach you how to fight and defend yourself. Even if you’re capable of that already, they’ll teach you something anyway. They’re both military men, they know what they’re talking about. Besides, it’s not as unlikely as one might think that you might get hurt because of them. You need to be able to defend yourself. They’ll take turns teaching you, improving your form and all. They’ll sometimes even deliberately spar in front of you so you could learn something from them fighting with each other. They won’t be as rough with you as they are with each other, especially not if you’re not part of the military, but they’ll be diligent in teaching you either way. If you’re part of the military then they’ll be rougher with you, but not as rough as with each other. Nikolai and Price have known each other for so long, they know where each other’s limits are. You’re the newest addition, so there’s still things they need to get to know. But I can assure you they will take good care of you. They’ll also reward you if you’re doing especially well during your little training lessons. Nikolai tries to bribe you into doing well by offering to cook your favorite meal if you do so.

The two of them actually spoil you rotten, especially if you don’t earn as much money as they do. Nikolai earns even more money than Price, so he has quite a lot to spend. Loves buying you and him all kinds of things. These can range from something useful to just something he saw and thought you might like. Price doesn’t like being indebted to people, so he always tries to buy Nikolai something back, even insisting that he shouldn’t buy him as many things. Nikolai never listens to him in that regard. And since Price buys Nikolai things he has to buy something for you as well. Sometimes it’s just your favorite kind of cake, sometimes it’s some nice and expensive jewelry. It’s always a mystery with Price. You don’t have to feel obligated to buy them something either. You’re more than welcome to if you have the finances to do so, but if you usually barely get by then you really shouldn’t have to. In fact, if you don’t have a lot of money then the two of them will pay for just about anything you need. Clothes, food, other necessities. It doesn’t matter. Together they have more money than they know what to do with anyway. It’s nice to spend it on someone you love and make them happy anyway. Don’t pay them back, they’ll find your bank account and return the money. They love you, let them pamper you like the little royalty you are.

#cod #cod x reader #cod nikolai #john price #nikolai x reader #john price x reader #price x reader #nikprice #nikprice x reader #I never really thought about writing charxchar on this blog in all honesty #but I suppose I can do it if more requests like this come in :] I doubt it but I'm willing to do it #I loved working on this because they may be smart but they're also complete and utter dumbasses #they're smart when it counts let's leave it at that #I actually have thought about being in a relationship with NikPrice before but I sometimes throw Graves into the mix as well #there's nothing wrong about yearning to be in a relationship with some men who could buy you something nice #and who would actually love you #see fictional characters are actually really good because they will always love you if you want them to #ugh I wanna cuddle these idiots so bad which is funny because I'm actually touch averse 95% of the time #but I just know that a good thorough cuddle session from those men would put me in a really good mood

[druidonity2]

My last two brain cells being investigated for identity theft and corruption.

#world of warcraft #varian wrynn #warcraft #i drew it when everyone was doing the meme and i realized i should post this before i forget #but like come on its perfect #I love these two and lowkey sad that more people don't give carefree dontgiveafuck dumbass charmed varian the fanwork he deserves #He was the one who sacrificed himself thinking that he would die so that Logosh could survive #BRO SAID “SHE SHALL NOT HAVE YOU” WHEN HE SAVED LOGOSH HE WAS GONNA SACRIFICE HIMSELF HES THE BEST #AND NOBODY REMEMBERS HIMM #I mean they do i guess but like LoGosh is more talked about and like i recongize its harder to talk about Charmed Varian when he doesnt hav #a unique name #and i joke hes not a dumbass hes really smart and caring and is very very lucky that his sacrifice actually saved them both because logosh #would not be able to rule by himself #I have an au where onyxia split anduin in a last act of defience before death and they cant combine the boys without risking his life and #as he grows older the twin boys flaws grow and grow until it dystroies their relationships and minds and theyre forced to find a fix #basically my headcanon is that logosh would've succumbed to his flaws as king alone and would not have succeeded as king as long as #the Varian we know did

[youngyoo-apologist]

I really like to make fun of Cale for learning life changing information on accident. He’s always like “how did this happen, who could have done something that lead to this?”

Brother, you did!

#he makes me want to cough up blood sometimes #this damn hypocrite #also #how is he so smart and so obvlious at the same time #this freaking guy 😭😭😭 #he makes me angry sometimes #I love him dearly #no because I’ll be re reading TCF and I start laughing out loud when I see something that will show up later #and Cale is like ‘lol I will be free of this soon and get my slacker life’ #GIVE UP NOW #GIVE UP #It’s so funny to me how like CJS and LSH were like ‘we gotta watch him so his dumbass doesn’t get into trouble’ #Cale when he realizes the only person preventing him from a slacker life is himself #lcf #tcf #rambling

[probablyscreamingintothevoid]

steve harrington and eddie munson are actually a nightmare together outside of life or death situations because i subscribe to the belief that they would both hear and laugh at the word "penetrate" until one is crying and the other throws up

they feed off of each others chaotic and opposite energy and they're a disaster together.

they can also be found at 3:42 a.m. discussing the meaning of life, what happens to humans when they die, why pride and prejudice and the hobbit & lord of the rings are the greatest literary works known to man, and where the wind goes after it blows.

they feed off of each others calm and steady energy, the intelligence that is there and is often over looked.

my point is put steve and eddie into a room together and you never know what you'll get, but i assure you it will be good.

#steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #stranger things thoughts #headcanons #stranger things headcanons #i love them so much #steve stranger things #eddie stranger things #they're dumb #but also very smart #chaotic dumbasses #stranger things fanficiton #my writing #please #give me this universe #stranger things #stranger things 4

[servantprincess]

something I would love to see more of in LU fanfic is the concept that, in fact, the Chain largely consists of Teenage Boys

Wild is reckless and likes to shield surf in not the best places? Well the frontal lobe doesn't fully develop until your mid 20's anyway, and he's hardly the only one in this group to come up with some dumb shit (Totem Time on someone's roof, anyone?)

Hyrule smells terrible and looks like he hasn't bathed in weeks when in fact he bathed yesterday, it's just that oil production ramps up during puberty and when you get to teenagedom, your BO suddenly gets Much Worse

Wind is getting his first pimple breakout and he HATES IT, but on the flip side he's convinced he's getting a chin hair and he's so fuckin excited. Warriors is pretty sure it's just peach fuzz but LOOK AT IT WARRIORS IT'S BLOND-

Four's voice still cracks even though he's pretty sure he's too old for that now, right?

Legend and Four both can get almost devastatingly catty, but that's understandable because emotions are a nightmare now too

and the group as a whole? Boys will be boys energy (but like the good kind)

Rubbing the floor to light up a lightbulb, singing competitions at 4 am, jury-rigging a slingshot for the hell of it, that kind of stuff

You will Know where some of the boys are with their hooting and hollering over the fact that some dumb idea worked

The only ones that would be fully exempt, I think, are Time and Warriors

Sky and Twi are mostly exempt but they are on Thin Ice

Time is so tired of parenting 5 or more teenagers (but he wouldn't trade it for anything)

but also I bet he Remembers being 9 years old and suddenly thrust into a 17-year-old hormone flooded body so he's like

yeah he gets it

idk just maybe playing around with focusing on the teenage aspect of 2/3rds-kinda of the group could be interesting

#linked universe #lu legend #lu four #lu wind #lu hyrule #lu warriors #lu time #lu wild #lu sky #lu twilight #let the boys be dumbass teenagers! #yes you can be smart and a dumbass and teenagedom is a great time for learning a lot of what Not To Do #and that's totally fine! it's how you learn and grow #i bet one of them starts a burping contest #i would love to see that

[spookyblazecoffee]

Brett: Three years ago today, I married my best friends. Brett: Nolan, Corey, and Theo are still mad, but Mason, Liam, and I were drunk and thought it was hilarious.

#Brett Talbot #Nolan Holloway #Corey Bryant #Theo Raeken #Mason Hewitt #Liam Dunbar #Brolan #Nett #Morey #Thiam #Lahey brothers (but only one of them) #Raeken siblings (but only one of them) #The Gayken siblings (but only one of them) #I don't post enough about Morey #I'm gonna try and post about them because I love them #Incorrect Teen Wolf quotes #Brett Mason and Liam were all friends pre-season 4 and no one can convince me otherwise #Liam Mason and Brett are a chaos trio and I love it #They are also a dumbass trio when together like on their own they're all pretty smart #but put together they share one (1) braincell #Mason gets the braincell most of the time

[thoma-daily]

im gently picking up ayaitto in my hands. holding them. i rlly need to do more research on them orz

this has been sitting in my drafts for awhile so i suppose ill post em now!

ayaitto prerelationship headcanon time!

ayato knows of itto before they meet, of course--he thought he was strange, but harmless.

he's completely caught off-guard though when itto calls him over to watch an onikabuto match between him and a kid; no reservations whatsoever.

for only a minute, ayato thinks that itto may be trying to get his foot in the door to grander things... and is immediately proven wrong when he doesn't bring up his title at all, and simply doesn't know that ayato is the yashiro commissioner

ayato again... just completely thrown off, but in the most delightful way possible in his eyes.

being able to relax like he's a kid again, after having to manage the commission from such a young age, is a breath of fresh air

and its even more interesting to him that although he has a tendency to not appear for months at a time, itto still thinks of them as close friends

so he keeps in touch with itto when possible, albeit usually by having thoma hand things off to him; smaller things that he doesn't care much for but knows itto would appreciate, like special drinks and snacks or a new set of cards. small tokens of appreciation

ayato also has a tendency to suggest odd jobs from the yashiro commission when itto needs money, just so that he can see him a bit more. (itto does not still realize that he's the yashiro commissioner.)

ayato is affectionate from afar; he already knows that itto wouldn't give up the gang or anything for him, so he doesn't bother asking. he simply gives small things to itto and resolves some of the problems the arataki gang gets into some of the time. (not all of them of course! it builds character to have to figure things out... and also it's amusing.)

on itto's end... god this man is so fucking clueless. love him

itto thinks of ayato as just a total bro, always sending little gifts and helping out, albeit indirectly. and he's so well spoken! itto takes some notes from him, and offers him a place in the gang, which ayato declines

shinobu knows who ayato is. the whole gang knows who ayato is. shinobu has tried to tell him and itto just scratched his head and went "well maybe it's a different ayato?"

shinobu does keep an eye on ayato though, she does NOT trust him at all.

itto tries to reciprocate all the little things that ayato sends him--usually little diy art things, that admittedly are really bad. ayato has a collection of them and they're very precious to him

#ayaitto #ayato #itto #god i love them. dumbass himbo and his smart boyfriend who enables him #|| search tags: #genshin impact

[thetricktofalling]

the real reason that we need a stormlight archive adaptation is so that we can watch kaladin putting literally zero effort into concealing his powers in WoR and it still working well enough that the dramatic reveal at the end actually surprises people

#cosmere #the stormlight archive #brandon sanderson #words of radiance #kaladin stormblessed #I remember reading the honor is dead scene and going ‘kaladin you dumbass’ OUT LOUD #I love this boy but none of the characters in these books are allowed to be smart except Navani

[ladyalicentshightower]

Criston Cole isn't really been afforded a lot of nuance by the fandom and it's starting to annoy me.

I think a few more small scenes would've done so much, say hearing the ladies of the court gossiping over an illegitimate child or even he himself discussing his background with either Alicent or Rhaenyra, which would've added to his development and his eventual crisis of faith, his Catholic guilt. I think people forget Criston is one of the few main characters who isn't a noble or a direct part of the family. As an illegitimate child in Westeros, all his life he's been told that he is the sinful thing, that he was born of sin and therefore unclean as result. By taking the white cloak and becoming a King's guard, he was able to put that "sin" behind him and become "clean". By sleeping with Rhaenyra he's stained and tainted that, something he can't handle or stand at all. He committed the ultimate sin, he's broken his oath, stained his honor and may have created a child doomed to be unclean too (obviously no such child was conceived or born but there was always the chance one could've been and I think that ate Criston alive inside and will probably be a factor of why he behaves the way he does towards Rhaenyra's sons). It's why he's so eager to run off and marry Rhaenyra so he can (in his mind) set it right. He wants to see himself as clean again. It's why he confesses so quickly to Alicent (also did some of you not watch the episode? Criston knew Rhaenyra snuck out, he had no way of knowing Rhaenyra was even with Daemon, he wasn't in King's landing to hear the gossip regarding Daemon & Rhaenyra that Larys spoke of and he was summoned immediately by Alicent so of course he assumed the rumours Alicent spoke of was referring to him), to seek forgiveness and regain some of that "cleanliness" before dying. Alicent offers him salvation, sanctuary, forgiveness while Rhaenyra shattered the version of herself he had built up in his mind. She betrayed that ideal he had of her and cannot understand why the "sin" they committed haunts him so greatly. For her it was a pleasurable night they spent together, to him it is his damnation, his ultimate sin. It's why he follows Alicent, in his eyes she offers him salvation while Rhaenyra can only offer him ruination.

I could ramble so much more about this, I don't know what it is but Alicent and Criston and the religious themes surrounding them both is absolutely fascinating.

#hotd #hotd spoilers #house of the dragon spoilers #house of the dragon #ser criston cole #ser criston #criston cole #alicent x criston #queen alicent #alicent hightower #alicent targaryen #like not going to say criston did nothing wrong but his actions and way he reacted is understandable if you look at what we know about him #joffery made a dumbass move and essentially fucked around and found out #like I'm pissed we got a queer relationship & one half got buried literally in the exact same episode #but like joff it was a robb stark marrying jeyne westerling / talisa move while betrothed to the roslin frey dumbass move #robb i love you always but that was such a dumbass move #joff you weren't even in kings landing a full day maybe wait til you had the lay of the land before approaching people #not justifying what Criston did to him because I was sat there like jesus christ what the actual fuck #but you got to be a little politically smart to survive in this world #joff u did a ned he assumed everyone was as honourable as he was and you assumed criston was as open as you and it bit you both in the ass #like I can't and won't defend what Criston did but I saw something coming the minute you walked over to him

[manila-bean]

don't worry, he'll get over it <3

#my art #mr. smart #christopher smart #lml #lonely-man's lazarus #lonely man's lazarus #self ship #self insert #comic #including the panel i forgot to post on instagram bc im like. a dumbass haha lol #this was for my 7 months post btw #hehe seven months of smarties <3333 mwuah love him so much aheem

[separatist-apologist]

“Is this about a certain High Lord’s son?”

“Yes,” Elain breathed, relieved Amera already knew. “He’s confessed his love and I–”

“He what?” she replied, a hand pressed to her chest. Finally, someone understood how dire the situation was.

“Yes! He wants to get married and take over my instruction entirely, but I can’t—he’ll…I—he just wants a dutiful wife. Please—”

“I don’t think that’s entirely true,” Amera said with wonder, her eyes as wide as saucers. “It’s just new to him, that’s all.”

Elain felt strangely betrayed. “New?”

“Being in love, I mean. He’ll settle once he gets used to it. How can I help, Elain? What can I do to make you feel comfortable—”

“Forbid him from taking me back.”

Amera blinked, confusion gracing her lovely features. “Take you where?”

Elain swallowed the urge to scream. How did she not understand what Elain was trying to say, of the risks of allowing Killian into the place to begin with. “Spring. Helion has promised me a year, but Killian—”

“Killian,” Amera interrupted, eyes glassy. She sat back in her chair, fingertips pressed against her lips. “Of course. From Spring Court. He’s in love with you.”

“I—” Who else would Elain be talking about. “Yes. He wants to get married and I don’t. He’s going to ask me and I need…I am hoping you’ll intercede on my behalf? Warn him of some unbreakable vow I’ve made, a bargain between us?”

#for five whole seconds amera truly thought lucien was in love #LOL unaware her son is a major dumbass #walking around like : yeah elain is beautiful and smart and i want to touch her skin and the smell of her sets me on fire #but thats because shes awful and i hate her and no other reason #ma'am you raised an idiot #elucien long fic #elf