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#i imagine if i were to write their story now
81folklore · 2 days
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i can do it with a broken heart - f1 grid
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parings: gn!driver!reader x platonic!f1!grid x ex!jacob elordi
summary: after yn and their ex break up, they carry on as best they can and no on had any idea how bad they were struggling
notes: george is in this but he does not drive for mercedes, yn does. i also used a mixture of fem and masc pictures because i couldnt decide and thought you could just imagine whatever you wish!!
notes 2: probably the longest fic ive done so far but im pretty proud of it. the time stamps above each section are semi important so i would keep an eye on them!! also i know ive been gone for so long but i do not promise ill be back. alsoooo i know i only included a bit of the grid but i kept getting distracted and then couldn’t figure out how to include everyone!!
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march 2024
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charles oh my god i cant believe my cat is finally the pfp
i have been waiting for YEARS
max yes well you better enjoy it because it’ll change soon and you’ll be back to waiting again.
lando jesus max do you have to use punctuation???
alex be glad he doesnt use captials
oscar one thing at a time lando, we dont want to scare him
max ???
lando anyway
yn mate you ok?
yourname im fine? ur scaring me you never ask how i am
lando yeah but usually your not single
lewis oh no! you and jacob split?
yourname yeah, wasnt working anymore
charles ah im sorry, that must suck😣
yourname i mean it does but its been coming for a long time so its not surprising
fernando hello! yn what is wrong? you always use emotes!
yourname theyre emojis nando, and im fine just a bit lost
fernando do not worry, i will come and find you!
yourname no, i dont mean literally just..we were together for so long i dont really know what to do now you know?
lando i get it, you wanna play tarkov with me???
yourname cheers ill get on now
george let us know if you need anything!
may 2024
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liked by mercedesamgf1, lewishamilton and 814,583 others
p✌️ was just what we needed this weekend!
thank you to everyone who came out and supported myself and the team and huge thank you to the team for working so hard all weekend⭐️
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mercedesamgf1 mega job this weekend yn👊 *liked by author*
landonorris nice to share the podium with you mate
yourusername same time next race?
user33 loved seeing you back on the podium
user2 absolutely smashing it this season
user21 more podiums please🤲 *liked by author*
user3 fourth podium of the year first p✌️*liked by author*
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*pretend it says after march i changed dates around last min*
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august 2024
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liked by lukehemmings, charles_leclerc and 1,124,642 others
did some reading, painting and writing
baked some good food and spent time with some good people, also got a cat…not bad for summer break☀️
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user66 AHHHHHH
yourusername ahhhhhhh
user26 cats name plsplspls
yourusername norman🐱
lukehemmings nice music👍
yourusername woah arent you the guy who wrote mum?!
mercedesamgf1 ready to see you back on the podium
yourusername always!!!!
user74 have you had funnnn??
yourusername yesss!! ive been doing lots of things i enjoy, basically treating every day as my birthday😋
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*was supposed to write them instead of her sorry!! was doing two stories at once and kept getting mixed up😅*
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october 2024
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liked by mercedesamgf1, gracieabrams and 1,291,638 others
p☝️ for the 3rd time this season, very very pleased
huuuuuge thank you to the team, every single one of you who worked tirelessly over the summer break and every moment since then, these have been for you⭐️
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user55 what a good season to be a yn fan *liked by author*
user6 these races have been incredible to watch, so proud
yourusername ⭐️⭐️
gracieabrams woop woop!!!!
yourusername 😝😝
user2 gracie??
user41 why have we not had any personal photo dumps yet😕😕
user88 right we miss seeing you yn!!
yourusername sorry guys😣ive been suuuper busy working on something i just honestly forgot
user41 NEW PROJECT?? WHEN?? (also pls dont feel bad we love u)
yourusername soon!! (and i love u guys too)
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november 2024
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liked by taylorswift, lewishamilton and 3,689,921 others
tagged: taylorswift
i cannot believe i get to say this, but my new friend taylor just released a new album and i was able to write a song on the album
im honestly not sure how this came about but i had so much fun writing this and expressing all my thoughts and feelings in a way ive never done before
i poured my life and soul into this song and im so glad taylor is the one who is singing it and really bought it to life
send some love to my friend and go and stream THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT (most importantly i can do it with a broken heart😉)
comments have been limited
taylorswift thank you for trusting me with this song, so much love🤍
yourusername NO THANK YOU!!! i will be forever grateful⭐️⭐️
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yourusername added to their story
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seen by taylorswift, lewishamilton and 729,282 others
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charles i feel completely betrayed yn
fernando oh no😟! what did yn do?
charles THEY DIDNT TELL ME THEY WERE WRITING A SONG??
AND WITH TAYLOR SWIFT HOW COULD YOU☹️☹️
yourname sorry charles, surprise?!
charles ill forgive you because its a good song
yourname thank you my life just got infinitely better!
yuki very good song yn! has been on repeat☺️
yourname thanks yuki, glad you like it!!
lando I LOVE IT TOO
but seriously are you ok?!
yourname yeahhh im better now
was just a lot to navigate
lewis glad you found an outlet! but remember you can always talk to any of us
yourname i know and i appreciate it, i really do
alex yn was that twitter thread right?
yourname mate youre going to have to elaborate
alex user56tweetlink
yourname oh pretty much yeah
some things were changed with taylor but not much
fernando just listened to the song yn! very nice👍well done!
yourname thank uu
max good song yn!
now
lando can you please tell me what you meant on your twitch stream!
oscar max is kind of scary
max dont make me talk about that interview next oscar!
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buckyownsmylife · 2 days
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out of the woods (chris evans x famous!reader smut)
the one where Chris watches an interview of you on the Ellen show
Warnings: mention of small stature in comparison to Chris, smut thoughts, Ellen Degeneres trash talking/thinking, cursing, mention of prescription medicine, talk of age gap (reader is younger than Chris), jacking off, daddy kink
WC: 3k
A/N: this doesn't really have an ending, so if you all like it, I might make a series out of it - the idea is that you are also famous (for acting, singing, writing) and have been friends with Chris but there's always this underlying tension between the two of you. It goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway: no, he's not married in this story nor do I intend to feature Alba in any part of it whatsoever.
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Chris’ P.O.V.
I was scrolling through Twitter when I realized some fans were tagging me in a short video of Y/N on Ellen DeGeneres’ show. I knew she had gone there by herself, mostly to promote her new album, but also to give some publicity for our movie, so I was aware that she would probably talk about me at least a bit… Curiosity got the best of me and I clicked the link to check the video for myself.
She looked gorgeous as always, her hair down in that way I loved so much and her skin seemed to be as soft as ever under the mini dress she chose to wear, her legs stretching out and making her look taller than she actually was. I chuckled, remembering just how small she looked by my side.
I remembered one time when I lifted her up, bridal style, and spun her around the pub we had close to the set, after the Patriots had won a game. Despite not understanding the game, she tagged along and celebrated every time I got excited, like the cute person that she was. I got so transfixed by her giggles back then. They were the sweetest sound and the only thing I heard, despite the fact that we were in the middle of a very loud bunch of dudes. 
I found myself imagining again, as I had then, what it would be like to have her under me, trapped by my arms in bed, or better yet, against a wall, only my thighs securing her in place while I made her moan with my touch. How would she sound? Or, better yet, how would she feel?
Christ. 
Shaking my head, I tried to gather my thoughts so as to not let them stray too far in that direction, something I didn’t have much success in doing, despite the fact that I had been practicing that simple habit every single day since I met her. But it was proving to be a nightmare. She was just far too tempting.
Shaking my head once more, I focused on the video in front of me. My heartbeat had sped up as soon as it started, but I tried to tell myself it was because I was scared for her, since I knew how Ellen could get invasive sometimes.
“So, Y/N…” She started, eyeing my co-star. “You have just finished working on a movie with someone we’re very familiar with, isn’t it?”
Y/N giggled, nodding at the blonde woman. “I suppose so. We have just finished the promotion for it, maybe you guys have already seen it?” She asked the crowd, who went nuts at her. It was sweet to see this kind of feedback, I truly believed in our movie and the fact that I got to know her was just an added bonus.
“For those of you who don’t know what we’re talking about, it’s called ‘Be Here Now’ and it’s currently in a theater near you. Y/N stars alongside Chris Evans, who we love so dearly here, and they play brother and sister as they try to reconnect after their parents' passing.”
More applause at that. I couldn’t stop myself from rolling my eyes at her idea of love. Last time I was there, she made me pretty uncomfortable, and I knew I wasn’t the only one who felt that way.
“So, how was the process for you? We know you’re familiar with the filming process, since you star in your own series ‘Evermore’, that sent you to stardom, along with your songs, but you had said before you’d never act outside of it, since your true passion relies on music. What changed your mind?” Ellen sat back as she said that, already comfortable with the fact that something good would come out of this interview, since Y/N had been pretty vocal about what made her decide to do the movie, even with me.
“Chris did, actually. Or, in fact, the fact that he was cast in it.” A chorus of “aws” echoed around the room and there was no way to know if they were real or prompted, but they were quickly interrupted by the host.
“So, you were a fan?” She instigated, as to what Y/N nodded again.
“Of course. Well, my mom more than me, but I was the one who introduced his work to her, so…” She poked her tongue out at the camera, to which my heart (and my cock) jumped in response. “Ever since I got into this, when I first had the idea for Evermore with James, I told him time and time again I would never act outside of this, because I had no intention whatsoever on becoming an actress. I have always been in this for the music. Well, the writing. I’m a writer, I like writing scripts and songs, I’ve fallen into this performer thing by accident. But I’ve always been adamant about the fact that if I ever had the opportunity to act alongside Chris, I’d take it. It doesn’t matter that I don’t think I’m good enough. It didn’t even matter if the script was terrible, which thankfully wasn’t the case, I just really admire him and his work and I would never live with myself if I turned this opportunity down.”
Even though I knew most of this, I couldn’t help but to gloat at the fact that this incredible woman actually admired me. She was so much better than me in so many things, even acting, and she still thought I was great enough to get her to participate in a movie. 
“So, what I’m hearing is, you have a little crush, that’s right?” And there it was. The coup. Of course. That evil wench…
“That’s what you took out of everything I said? Jesus, Ellen, has anyone ever told you that you listen like a man?” Ouch. That one was perfect. Being the ambassador for females and lesbians everywhere, it couldn’t not hurt her, especially coming from someone as angelical, sweet and universally-loved as Y/N. I appreciated the quick second her smile faltered before it became plastered on her again.
“No, I haven’t heard that before… But tell me, have you met any of the other Marvel actors? I mean, granted, there are a lot of them now, but especially those who have worked closely with Chris?” Y/N shrugged at that.
“I have been friends with Elizabeth Olsen for a very long time, we’re very close, but other than that, no. I haven’t had the chance to properly meet, or rather, hang out with any of them.”
“Who’s first on your list?”
“Anthony Mackie,” Y/N promptly responded, getting a few laughs and claps from the audience.
“My, you had that answer ready” Ellen teased, to which Y/N simply shrugged again. 
“We talk through social media sometimes and I know for a fact he’s hilarious. I hope we get to meet sometime. I might just have to bug Chris about it.” She had already, in fact. I couldn’t wait to introduce them to each other and I was already planning my next party just to be able to make that happen.
“What about Sebastian?” Ellen asked, a glinter of something extremely suspicious in her eyes.
“Sebastian Stan? No, we haven’t met, but I’d love to get the chance to someday. He seems extremely sweet and I know he’s very talented and Chris loves him, so I think it’s a matter of time until it happens.”
“I heard somewhere you had a bit of a crush on him, right? Even if you don’t admit that you have one on Chris?” This fucking woman. I could fucking kill her right now. But, to my surprise, Y/N simply laughed.
“Truly, you have got to check your hearing sometime soon, because that is absolutely false.” 
“Really?” Ellen pushed, to which Y/N beamed even brighter at her.
“Positive.” A beat as the two women stared at each other down. “I think what you meant is that I have had a huge crush on his character, Bucky Barnes.” Y/N explained, laughing at the host. “I admit that only happened after I saw Sebastian’s portrayal of him, but my attraction to a fictional character can’t be really connected to him.”
Ellen nodded, obviously not paying attention to anything she was just saying. “Well, let’s figure out who do you actually feel attracted to, shall we? Let’s play fuck, marry or kill!”
The audience screamed and, to my surprise, Y/N didn’t even blink, a patient smile painting her lips as she calmly watched the interviewer. “So, Y/N, between Anthony, Sebastian and Chris, who would you rather fuck, marry or kill?”
Y/N shook her head, still smiling at the older woman. “I couldn’t possibly answer truthfully to this question, Ellen, mostly because I am not capable of feeling carnal attraction to people I have never met, but I can 100% assure you that I would marry Chris without blinking twice if there was a choice.” 
My heart skipped a beat at her words. The crowd went crazy, obviously satisfied with the answer.
“And you’re sure you don’t have a crush on him?” Ellen’s eyes glistened with mischief, as she stared at the younger woman.
“Ellen, I think the question here is… Are you sure *you don’t have a crush on him?” The laughs from the audience was the last thing to come from the video before it stopped, and I found myself echoing them in the silent living room. Oh my, how I missed this girl.
I tapped my fingers nervously on my jean-clad thigh, looking around the room. I had been staying in Boston with my family for the last few weeks, since the movie premiered and we had finished promotion, and I had found myself constantly calling her to share funny stories from my nephews or to hear about her day. I knew she wanted to meet my family, she had always said she admired the fact that we were so close, despite there being so many of us.
My mom obviously loved her, having been a fan of hers long before I even heard about her existence. So what if…? 
Before I could second-guess myself, I pressed call in the name of the woman I had been thinking about. The phone rang three times before she picked up, stopping me from giving up on this crazy idea.
“Hey, Chris! How are you? I missed talking to you, it’s so weird seeing you everyday for four months and then suddenly not at all anymore.” I know I was literally forty, but I literally melted at this girl’s words.
“Did you now? Is that because you wish we were married, so we could see each other everyday?” Her breath hitched as she realized I had seen the video and I could just imagine the cute little embarrassed expression she was probably sporting right now. I tried to ignore the fact that my words and tone of speaking had suddenly become way too similar to when I was flirting with a girl.
“Fuck, you saw the interview.” I had never heard Y/N curse before, so the fact that I suddenly had no control over my mouth could be explained by the unavailability of blood in my head, since it had all gone south.
“Come stay with me for a while,” I spilled suddenly. Silence was the only answer I got from the other side of the call and my heart sped up in a way that only happened when I was truly anxious. I was already cursing myself out for scaring the poor girl when she finally answered.
“Are you serious?” She asked, her voice barely over a whisper. It was obvious how vulnerable she was feeling, and a sense of overprotectiveness overcame me. “Please don’t joke about this, Evans. This better not be a prank. ‘Cause I really do miss you a lot.”
Fuck indeed. There was no way something good would come out of this idea, but there was no way I would go back either.
“Of course I’m being serious. Come to Boston. You can stay with me, but I think my mom is going to steal you before you even settle in.” A large breath came from the other side.
“Okay. Okay! I’m going to pack my bags. Yay! I’m so excited!” She was clearly jumping up and down with the perspective of what was to come, and I couldn’t help the smile that painted my lips not only at her cuteness, but also due to my own excitement at her arrival. 
“Great! I’ll be waiting.” My heartbeat still hadn’t gotten back to a normal speed. “Text me the details of your arrival, I’ll pick you up at the airport.”
“Chris, I don’t think that’s such a good idea…” I knew what she meant. If someone caught sight of us together at the airport, or even the fact that she was here in Boston, all hell would break loose in the press.
“Shhh, don’t worry about it, baby girl. I’ll take care of it.” I froze, only then realizing what I had just called her. A few seconds ticked by while I silently freaked out, wondering how I could brush this over, when she intervened.
“Thanks, Chris. That was pretty much the best thing I’ve ever heard. I just might forgo my prescription medicine while I’m over there, because you’ve been able to completely relax me with just two sentences.” She giggled and if I was at first leaning towards thinking she was sarcastically teasing me, just by the nature of her words, the tone of her voice made it clear that she actually meant what she had just said.
Once again, I was at a loss for words, especially because I couldn’t help but to allow myself to imagine that this was her, flirting with me a little bit. The blood I so desperately needed in my brain had once again left to pump another organ full of life. I was saved from having to answer, though, as Y/N quickly wrapped up the conversation.
“I’ll text you the details of my flight in a little bit. See you soon, angel.” She hung up before I could process the nickname she had given me. 
“Fucking hell,” I whispered, finally relenting and getting up from the couch to take a shower to rub one off.
I had found myself in this situation more times than usual after meeting Y/N. Normally, I’d only do it out of boredom, preferring to fuck someone whenever I’d get sexually frustrated. But the last few times I had taken girls from parties into my bedroom, I could only see her. Y/N. And I hated how disgusting I felt after it was done, the fact that I didn’t care about the girl I just fucked and the fact that I imagined my younger friend.
So now I resorted to this kind of activity. As the warm water started to hit my body, I allowed my right hand to travel the extent of my body until I found my hardened member. “Fuck,” I found myself whispering into the bathroom as I tugged on my cock. Images that I had spent a lot of time concocting in my head flashed in front of me, all of them starred by Y/N. 
I imagined her nude body here with me, under the falling water. How her breasts would heave with every breath she took. Would she be as filled with desire for me as I was for her? I imagined the path the warm droplets of water would run across her skin and how I wished I could lick its remnants. 
Maybe she’d fall to her knees before me, looking up from under her eyelashes with that coy expression that drove me crazy. Her lips would softly kiss the tip of my cock and she’d still be watching me, analyzing my reactions. I would do my best to restrain myself, allowing her to get accustomed to my member, but my hands would eventually find their way to her wet strands, creating a makeshift ponytail that would facilitate my vision of her work while I still managed to control myself and not use it to guide her.
She’d kiss the skin all around my cock, quick little kisses just to tease me before going further down to suck on my balls. I’d throw my head back, begging her to do what I needed, and she’d finally succumb, wrapping her lips around my tip before slowly sucking further down my dick. She’d be relentless, eventually being able to swallow my whole member down her throat, and I would look down again to see her looking up at me with a proud gaze in her eyes.
“Such a good girl,” I would whisper, just before I finally snapped, using my grip on her hair to pull her from my cock until just the tip remained tightly squeezed by her lips, until I pushed her all the way against me again. “Take this fucking cock like the little perfect girl you are for daddy.”
And she’d take it like a pro, a satisfied smile on her lips as I fucked her mouth, eventually breaching into her throat, making her gasp for air, tears in her eyes as her hands flew to my hips in an attempt to slow me down. But she wouldn’t really, opting for simply carving her nails on my flesh as she took every single rope of cum I’d deposit between her eager lips.
Fuck. I let the water wash away the sin I had just committed while sending up a prayer for better control when Y/N arrived. The last thing I needed was to be stuck in the bathroom, touching myself while she was at my house.
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spade-riddles · 3 days
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I’m having so much fun imagining a post-jerklie-divorce scenario where it’s reported that Karlie is staying with Taylor (like Sophie Turner did) and all the shocked swiffers gear up to write their ‘stay away from her’ soliloquies… but their brains glitch for a moment when they remember Taylor telling them off for berating her about MH. The moral dilemma of hating Karlie but (hopefully) realising they can’t say anything lest Taylor call them pearl-clutching vipers in empath’s clothing who think they know what’s best for her 😹
It’s just endlessly funny to me how blindsided they were by MH while we had the luxury of knowing it wasn’t a real relationship, so we could reason ‘her beards usually parallel stories she wants to tell about Karlie so…’ I remember some of us theorised the most likely reason for her to take that hit to her image was she probably had some forbidden love / BDILH-themed songs in the works. and here we are!
Now they’re stuck trying to shoehorn MH into the timeline and unintentionally getting so close to seeing the golden Karlie thread that runs through every album since 1989! mastermind shit.
Excellent points made here! 👏👏👏
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pamicakery · 20 hours
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₊✩‧₊˚౨How to manifest Sp ৎ˚₊✩‧₊
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Okay... I will tell you a success story of mine, when I manifested a crush.. Who was about to become my boyfriend and... That you must be really careful about what you want.
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It was when I was 16, and I had this crush on this guy let's call him Wolfie. Firstly we became friend because we were in the same group of friend so during class we used to hang out together. I grew up fond of this guy, he was sarcastic, funny and single.
At night I would draw ourselves being lovers, listening to music and making imaginary Music videos about us. Writing stories about him being my crush in them and everytime I saw a cute couple I told myself '' Hehe it gonna be us''.
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Times to times he used to hang out with others girls, and I got jealous many times but I was persisting in the fact that he was my boyfriend.
Everytime we had an interaction, I would repeat Thoses scenes on loop,and draw the scene of it. The idea of us not being together was out of my mind.
Every scene I envisioned came true :
I visualized and drew us talking via text messages ➡️he asked for my number the next day
I drew us talking together during a class assignment ➡️we worked together for that class assignment and I even drew us get married.
Him sitting next to me in class ➡️he did.
We were at a point that we even had lunch together, going back home together. We were always together.
But it was too much for me, I started to complain that we were too much together and guess what? I didn't had time to breathe.
Sometimes I wanted to be alone, he was there. During the field trip, the guy came in my bedroom. (Nothing happened don't worry, but I scripted this). He even asked me out and invited me to drink milkshake... Like my first date... I was like '' noooo I don't '' but I said yes because I was about to have a milkshake for free.
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I didn't know about '' manifesting '' back then, I was just imagining us being together. And it reflected, not instantly but it took 1 or 2 weeks. Manifestation is very powerful and if you are not sure about what you want, it can be really scary.
But it's just a case, maybe I was too obsessed with him. Hehe but what you have to do is :
💖 PICK A STATE :
From now on you will identify as someone who's Sp is their boyfriend. Leave the 3d alone, (By the way I didn't know about 3d or 4d at that time.)
💖: EXPRESS THAT STATE WITHIN :
Draw, visualise, listen to music, write stories. You must train your brain and Show it that SP is your boyfriend with Internal proof and validation. (Look inside of your 4d's 3d because your 4d's 3d is reflecting a state of you already having and being this person) And at every positive interaction with SP, repeat it on loop in your mind.
💖 : IGNORE THE 3D :
My Sp used to hang out and smile with girls, and I was jealous about it. But in my head he was my boyfriend.
💖:IT'S POSSIBLE :
It's possible to attract Sp, don't put logic into it because love doesn't walk with logic. Keep that image of you being together, your brain and yourself will be used to it.
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I know that sometimes tell ourselves that it's only imaginary. But really, don't put chains to yourself in your mind. You didn't had to take actions in your mind, you are already there, you are already with them.
Once again, don't seek validation in the 3d of lack. Seek validation within yourself. The year before that SP, I had a rejection from another SP, same the year prior. So... Actually I didn't even changed my self concept, I just imagined myself with that guy like any girl would do.
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Hiya! First of all your blog’s interface is so cute i’m rolling on the floorrrrrrr
Second of all your writing is absolutely amazing, i’ve just finished reading “the pizza delivery girl’s survival guide to gotham city” and lemme tell u i can’t wait for the next chapter cause absolute gold-
I wanted to ask what your thoughts are on Jason and day-to-day life outside of costume. Like, dude HAS to go outside as himself at least every once in a while, out of pure necessity. How do you think he goes on about it?
Aw, thank you, I'm glad you like my blog interface and my fic. I think it depends on how much he's progressed in processing his trauma, to be honest!
I imagine when he first moved back in Gotham, he avoided going out as much as possible, for a multitude of reasons. First, because he was still reeling emotionally from Bruce enacting project Knightfall (aka faking his own death), he was recovering from the injuries he sustained during the events of Arkham Knight (and of course, the injuries he got from the Joker). Most importantly, he is adjusting to living in a city he once hated enough to want to destroy.
I feel like those first few weeks were painful for him. Every place is filled memories, and while not all of them are bad memories, they often feel too painful to revisit. He likely spent most of his time cooped up in a safehouse (which was established as something he makes no effort to make comfortable), only going out when he absolutely had to. Interacting with the city and its people as little as possible. While I don't think the Joker ever meant him to survive his torture, the amount of scars and physical injuries he bears means that a lot of his interactions bring a lot of (misplaced) guilt and shame. Did that shopkeep spend too long looking at his face, his scar? Maybe he'll pass by some hole-in-the-wall shop and remember that he and Dick and Barbara would cool down there after patrols. The ramen, he'll think, is surprisingly good. The owner is a smiling, heavyset man who insists that they never pay for their meals. Maybe he'll even take a single step toward the shop, only to remember that the scars on his hands make it so it's hard to hold cutlery without shaking. That there are days when it's physically painful to eat. And he'll shake his head and walk away.
But I think the more he interacts with PG in the story and the more he fixes his relationship with his family, the more he'll be able to interact with Gotham City. Maybe going to the grocery won't be treated like a military supply run. Maybe he'll look up from his carefully-curated list and realize a type of candy Barbara used to be obsessed with is back in stock now. Maybe he'll put it in his cart, and for the first time in a while, he doesn't have to think about what he did to her as the Arkham Knight. One day, he'll wake up before his alarm and remember that you used to talk about watching the sun rise over Gotham Bay. He'll take a long walk along the shoreline and watch the way the sky turns into soft shades of pink and orange, and he'll be surprised at the realization that there are still beautiful things in Gotham. Maybe your face will flash in his mind, and he'll think that perhaps he shouldn't be so surprised, after all. Maybe one day, after a long night of patrol, he'll pass by the ramen shop again and this time, he decides to stay. The only thing that has changed is the owner, who's gained weight and a few gray hairs, but his smile is still the same. He'll bring Jason's order without asking, and he'll insist that he doesn't have to pay for it. Eating doesn't hurt as much as he feared. In fact, some days, he can move his hands without feeling pain. This is one of the good days. Maybe on that good day, he'll be surprised to find that the ramen is still good. That he can think of the days he used to stay here with his family after patrols, exchanging combat tips and juicy bits of gossip. And this time, he's able to smile.
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stopaskinf · 2 days
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“The body is the law, and I’m only human after all”
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Summary: Namjoon loves you a little too much❤️
Genre: Dark fic, Yandere, Dead Dove do not eat?
CW: Yandere Namjoon, he’s wilding in this. Cursing. Descriptions of bodily harm, organs and blood. Shit gets weird
Word Count: 0.5K
A/N: This is pretty different from what I usually write but fuck it we ball. 🫡🫡
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Kim Namjoon is meticulous.
He’s a man who needs to search every nook and cranny before he experiences any satisfaction.
Especially, when it comes to you.
Namjoon cannot learn enough about you.
You’ve been together for years, but it still doesn’t feel like he knows enough.
He knows you’ve had a couple of relationships before him. The first was a 2-year relationship that was ended by you because your ex became emotionally unavailable. The second was a year-and-a-half-long relationship that was ended by your ex because they had “found someone else”. What an absolute cunt.
He knows you have a mole on the nape of your neck that you refuse to get rid of because “It’s a good ice breaker”. You have exactly 5 scars littered around your body. A small one on your right forearm, a thin one on your left cheek, a noticeable one on your right knuckles, an incredibly faded one on your left knee, and a more recent one on the back of your right ankle.
The first three come from childhood accidents. The other two happened because, just like him, you’re clumsy.
Speaking of your childhood, Namjoon hates your parents and siblings.
The fact that there are people who have known you more than him categorically? Unacceptable.
He bubbles in rage knowing that they saw you through each phase of your life. That they saw your first steps, your first words. They saw you through your embarrassing phases and comforted you when you were upset about something you laugh about now.
Nothing eats him up more than second-hand information.
Nonetheless, he begrudgingly accepts it.
He’ll make do with your stretch marks, scars, and stories that you tell him about yourself. Still, he can’t help but imagine knowing you even deeper when he lays on your steady chest in the dark of your shared home.
Your usual 78 bpm slows down to 65 bpm. He can imagine your red blood cells flowing to your aterums and thoracic cavity through your tubes. He can somewhat feel the shape of your ribs and picture your lungs behind them. He still needs more.
He needs to vivisect you. To cut you down from your throat to your genitals. He needs to open your ribs and feel your heart thump in his bare hands. To feel your intestines, so that even if he went blind, he’d still retain the shape.
He wants to open your brain. To caress the folds of it and ask you when and where each one developed. To touch your vocal cords and feel the muscles reverberate as you guide him through your organs.
He wants to rest his head on your exposed heart, to feel the blood pool and clot onto his face. He wants the metallic smell of your blood to suffocate his senses. He needs to feel you so deeply that it stains him.
A boy can dream, can’t he?
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wetcatspellcaster · 4 hours
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Metapost: "The Ascendent"
**this is a meta for my fic, Pieces Still Stuck in Your Teeth, and NOT a discussion of the BG3 game canon in any way. If you try and make this into a disk-horse, I will BITE you**
(spoilers under the cut for Chapters 1-23 of Pieces Still Stuck in Your Teeth).
So... remember in the Chapter One endnote when I said I was a Spike/Buffy fan first, and a person second? x
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In more seriousness, there was a number of fictional seasonings/ingredients went into creating what I felt was the villain of a Gothic horror, and what I felt could turn the Ascendent into something that was both 'fixable', and something I enjoyed writing.
Those ingredients were:
Spike and the idea of 'soulless' vampires in the BtVS canon - do I like this conceit of BtVS worldbuilding and how it's used in the show? No. I think it often underlines how bad Whedon is at writing romance. BUT I do think it gives Buffy this free pass for which vampires she can/can't like or adopt, and I needed some of that for my protagonist. I need a 'I can fix him' moment - BtVS has those in fucking SPADES.
Howl's Moving Castle (this one was accidental, I'm still mad at myself but I can't deny it's there) - man conducts magic ritual for power, removing an essential part of himself in the process that needs to be returned
Picture of Dorian Gray (the idea of an exterior staying pristine while something hidden suffers and decays)
Curse of Strahd (the soulless in Barovia, which I mentioned in Chapter 23)
The idea of default moral alignments in D&D. I have a whole chapter arguing against this in my thesis (mostly bc it's often applied to entire races) but I was fascinated by creating a set of circumstances where I feel like a default moral alignment is valid, actually. 7,000 deaths seems like a good set up. I wanted to imagine a being that was trapped within a default moral alignment, and the laws of its very being prevent it from being good no matter what it tries, and it knows that (this kind of creates a feedback loop with the Spike/Buffy stuff)
The parts of the BG3 canon I took and REMADE (I'm stressing this throughout, I was making a horror story and a horror monster your honour):
Astarion conducts the Rite of Profane Ascension with scars on his back, but has to scar Cazador's back personally, suggesting that um... the Rite REALLY SHOULDN'T BE CONDUCTED BY SOMEONE WHO'S GOT THOSE SCARS. Cazador wasn't going to do it that way, is all I'm saying!!
The idea that Ascended!Ending Astarion is a concentrated version of certain traits that have persisted throughout his story - his flirtiness, his understanding of sex as a mechanism and expression of power, his use of a façade as a mask for trauma he refuses to acknowledge.
The lines alluding to dissociation in the brothel foursome, post-Ascension.
The idea that Astarion seduced Tav to survive or protect himself- in my case, because I made the Ascendent empty save for Astarion's survival instinct, the idea that he would gravitate towards Tav as one of his default modes to potentially survive made sense to me - this is why it becomes an obsession.
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For me, when writing, the Ascendent is a few things:
An intensification of vampirism in a different, fucked-up direction. Yeah, A!Astarion, you can walk in sunlight and you can eat and drink and don't need blood. But you are still a hungering maw of emptiness that feels like it will never be whole or close and connected to the living - just now in a wildly different, metaphysical/existential direction! Welcome to depression, alienation, and otherness!
A soulless being, that knows it is soulless - that initially was very happy with its life but then as the years passed, increasingly spends its every waking moment knowing there is something innately wrong with it that it can't seem to shake, no matter how much it engages with life and all the pleasures of life. (see the 'every meal without savour' speech)
A magically literal metaphor for Astarion's dissociation in moments of extreme trauma, up to and including the fight with Cazador - essentially, the moments when there is nothing but a performance or an exterior, because the self/soul are suffering and they cant' come to phone right now
Astarion's survival instinct. As I say in Chapter 23 - Mephistopheles thinks it is an empty body, who's performance is trying to deny the reality of it's own existence. Rosalie, who has a bit more understanding of Astarion, sees that the performance is not just a coping mechanism but one of Astarion's main modes of survival. The Ascendent is Astarion's survival instinct/techniques for endurance, without any soul or person behind them to protect. This is how I tried to tie in the flirty, hypersexual persona and wrap it with a bow.
I wanted a monster that was undeniably scary, and monstrous to me (oh? you can't fit in or be happy no matter what you do and no matter how hard you try, and you think there's something intrinsically off? how's that autism diagnosis going Emma) but that I also felt sympathy and true sorrow for. I needed to have motivations for him chasing after Tav that I could write meaningfully from and sympathise with.
Not only has Astarion used Tav as a life-raft once before, they've also proven to be the most secure thing he's ever clung to. Of course a rabid survival instinct Astarion would become obsessed, and see them as a potential solution to the problem (this was then intensified by Rosalie also being a walking, overbearing moral compass, and having bound him in a contract in the first week of living, accidentally - a lawful good immoveable objects meets a default moral alignment unstoppable force.)
...Because I also wanted that moral alignment spice!! Wizards of the Coast, default moral alignment is fucked up actually!!! Imagine something trying so desperately to be good - literally being bound in a pact and having been told to be good - but the laws of the universe and its very essence are like "nah mate, we kind of want to destroy and annihilate everything, we're neutral evil personified". That's scary!! that's fucked up!! that's what a birth from 7000 deaths gets you!!!
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So, now for the actual timeline, for people who aren't interested in my silly musings but mostly just want answers lmfao.
Rosalie makes the decision not to intervene in Cazador's mansion, making it seem like she'll support whatever decision Astarion will make there.
Rite of Profane Ascension happens. Astarion conducts the ritual, rips his own soul from his body, the Ascendent is born with literally zero context. Mephistopheles is fucked in Cania, because a bunch of stuff has just gone wrong.
(oh, by the way, the Ascendent knows Infernal as a default language. Bc it's born from an Infernal rite.)
The Ascendent is now default neutral evil, and feeling some kind of way. Rosalie and him break up. He's supposed to have everything, but the one thing he thought was a done deal - his most stalwart suppporter - just rejected him.
Netherbrain defeat (the Ascendent is not invited. Imagine being an all-powerful, hypersexual survival instinct vampire, and your ex-girlfriend neither wants you for sex, nor your power.)
Rosalie accidentally binds the Ascendent (a soulless devil) in a pact demanding that he never kill anyone, when that's literally what the Ascendent's new existence/new default moral alignment is driving him to do. Then, she fucks off and goes into hiding.
Well. The Ascendent can just get another wizard, to help him learn all of Cazador's secrets to cope [Hemlock is recruited].
The years go by! The Ascendent is doing sooooo well. Everything is great, guys! I'm rich, I'm beautiful, I have lavish parties and lots of sex - why do I feel nothing? I'm a vampire perfected - I have no hunger for blood, I can walk in the sun, I can enjoy all the freedoms of a living, breathing man - why do I feel like I'm starving? Why does everything turn to ashes in my mouth? I have friends - oops, I've sabotaged all those friendships with my innate neutral evil destruction. Why can't I feel anything? What's wrong with me? I'm doing everything right? Why doesn't it feel that way?
Also, I can't kill anything to feel better about it, because my hidden ex-girlfriend bound me in a pact.
In this time, to reflect the gradual degradation of the Ascendent's happiness and it's increasing awareness that it is something Other and innately wrong, the reflection starts going weird. Starts going strange. Starts getting a bit fucked up. Almost as if, when he looks in the mirror and sees a person, *nothing* should be what's there. Imagine being a spawn who couldn't see your reflection, and then a vampire who could see it's reflection, but knows that they're innately empty. Knows there's nothing there. I'd freak out a little bit about it as well tbh, I'd go a bit tooth and claw and elongated jaw about it.
The Ascendent finally admits that's there must be something kinda fucked about it. Life just ain't working out, lads. He starts looking for any and all impossible cures that will help with the malaise in his soul (and that innate essence problem, caused by default moral alignment). These include: more bad decisions, such as a house in Cania bc the Ascendent is hoping he'll feel more at home with devils than he does with mortals. All it does is make him feel more isolated and alone.
But eventually, he settles on two things! - Wish (Hemlock's idea), and Rosalie (the Ascendent's idea). Clearly, we just need Rosalie back! Her leaving is actually what fucked him up in the first place - none of this existential bullshit! She fixed us one, she can fix us again.
But looking for Rosalie hasn't worked out. In order to get a shot at her, the Ascendent goes and bargains for his own soul from Mephistopheles. Mephistopheles, adding a new sheet in excel titled 'what the fuck happens when i give this soulless monster a soul to play with?', agrees and starts tracking his new data.
Obviously, just putting the soul back in yourself will fix you. But the Ascendent, the nothingness living inside Astarion's body, will die. Taking the soul back would erase itself. The Ascendent - who is survival instinct personified - would never do this.
So instead, it starts interviewing and cannibalising the soul. Bc a soul is what it needs, this is the closest it's ever felt to being alive. Bc it's made this all about Rosalie, he thinks he's found his solution. The chase is making him feel alive again. It's true love, lads! not the soul.
Wish auction happens - the Ascendent is beaten to the punch by some unknown (hot) wizard.
This avenue cut off, the Ascendent makes the decision to try and win Rosalie back.
Astarion advises that to make her come back to the Gate, he should murder a bunch of people. Because this comes from the soul, not the soulless devil nothingness, it circumvents the pact.
...The events of Pieces begin!
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And finally - the Ascendent tries to destroy Jar!Starion for many reasons in Chapter 19:
The Ascendent knows that it dies, if the soul and the body get reunited (or is that constant high alert survival instinct just no longer needed, because the problem is fixed? you decide.)
The Ascendent values Tav above itself. Tav is going to fix them. Astarion believes he could never fix himself.
Dissociation - that soul isn't me. I'm here, looking at my soul. If I get too close, it'll kill me.
Self-hatred - that soul isn't me. That man made a mistake, and I've had to live with the consequences. He doesn't deserve to live, for what he's made me become.
The knowledge that Rosalie/Tav will only ever want that version of him, not the one that's living and breathing, that sees itself as the most wretched, fucked-up version of itself. So... give them no choice. They have to deal with me and love me at my worst.
And if the Rite didn't work - if the version of the Ascendent walking around isn't the best one, and the one people want... what was it all for? Why does the Ascendent feel like this? Why does it have to suffer?
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....And, that's my little meta post! If anyone has any questions about the timeline or any motivations at any points in the fic, I'm obviously more than happy to explain things via ask/comment, as always!
TLDR: I just wanted to make a Gothic horror. I wanted a dark romance, fucked up obsession vampire/mortal dynamic, but I also wanted a situation that was scary for both Astarion and my Tav. I personally think an Astarion who is so dissociated and separate from reality that he feels that in his bones daily, is scary. It's the lingering impact of the traumas the Rite and those 7,000 souls embodied.
I was literally just trying to make it a horror, for everyone involved.
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mimisempai · 3 days
Text
Not the same goodbye anymore
Summary
Aziraphale and Crowley have said goodbye many times in the past, but today, as he watches the Bentley drive away, the angel realises that now every goodbye will be different.
Notes
50 Types of Kisses - Writing Prompts
Kiss #46: A lingering kiss before a (long) trip apart.
On Ao3
Rating G -  902 words
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Crowley glanced at his watch and sighed. There was no point in putting it off, it was time for him to go.
He said quietly, "Angel..."
Aziraphale nodded and replied, "Say no more, it's time for you to go, isn't it?"
They stood up at the same time and walked side by side to the door of the bookshop.
The demon turned to the angel and, taking her face between his hands, said softly, "The longer I delay, the harder it will be. Don't be sad, it's only a few days, you won't even have time to miss me".
Aziraphale replied in a slightly wry tone, "I know, you're only leaving for three days and yet it feels like a trip around the world."
Crowley stroked the angel's cheek with his thumb and replied softly, "I know, Angel, believe me, I know. I feel like I'm going away for a long time too."
Aziraphale had done his best not to show the melancholy he had felt at the thought of the demon's absence. He had told himself that he should be happy that Crowley was so passionate about his work at the planetarium.
It was just for some days.
They'd been apart for much longer, with no certainty of seeing each other again, which was not the case now.
But despite all this good reasoning, now that Crowley was about to leave in a few seconds, the angel found it hard to put up a front.
He wanted to put his hand over his mouth to stop the words coming out, but Crowley still held his face in his hands and the Angel's mouth was running faster than his brain so he couldn't help but blurt out, "Will you miss me?"
The demon gave a small smile and replied in a low voice, "I miss you already, Angel.
Then he leaned forward and pressed his lips to the angel's in a tender kiss. 
When he tried to pull away a fraction of a second later, he could not because Aziraphale's hands had caught his face and were pressing against him to make the kiss last. The demon didn't struggle, of course, and the kiss lasted a few more seconds.
When they finally broke apart, Crowley ran his thumb over the Angel's lips and said sheepishly, "I really have to go now, Angel.
Aziraphale, his throat tightening, nodded and walked out with the demon to accompany him to the car. 
Once in front of the Bentley, Crowley planted a light kiss on the Angel's temple before getting behind the wheel. 
Aziraphale waved at him through the window and, seeing his sad little smile, the demon couldn't resist and rolled down the window.
Poking his head out, he said to the angel with a half-smile on his lips, "One last one for the road?”  
Smiling, Aziraphale leaned over and, after one last kiss on the demon's lips, said softly, "Have a good time, my love."
They looked at each other in silence for a few moments before the Bentley decided to take matters into its own hands and sped away.
Aziraphale, chuckling slightly, followed the car with his eyes until it disappeared around the corner.
"Hard to let him go, isn't it?"
The angel, who didn't really have the heart to deflect, replied softly to Nina, who had just arrived beside him, "You have no idea." 
Nina nudged him with her shoulder and replied, "Oh, I think I have a little idea, you know, when Maggie decides to go on one of her trips in search of rare records. I may know she'll be back, I may know it'll only be for a short time, this little place she's got here..." 
Nina tapped her chest before continuing, "remains empty, and the emptiness is felt until she's back. So, knowing your story, I can imagine... how it is for you."
Aziraphale nodded without answering, for Nina couldn't have described what he was feeling more accurately. 
But at the same time, today was different from all the times he'd watched Crowley leave, not knowing when or if he'd see him again, not being able to say how he felt, never knowing how the demon felt.
Everything was different.
Crowley loved him and he loved Crowley.
They both knew it.
He knew that Crowley would be back in three days.
He knew the demon would miss him, just as he had made no secret of the fact that he would miss the demon.
So, sure, that little void Nina was talking about was there, in his chest, but it was bearable because he knew Crowley would be back soon to fill it again.
So instead of focusing on that void, he decided to focus on the perspective of the demon's return.
He turned to Nina and asked with a smile on his face, "So, Nina, what sweet treats are you serving at the cafe today?"
Nina threw on that little smile she always had when she understood a situation, put her arm around Aziraphale and led him to the coffee shop, giving him a detailed list of the day's pastries.
Three days later, when she saw the Bentley parked outside the bookshop, she thought that it was unlikely that the bookseller would be coming in for a pastry today, as he probably didn't need any comfort food.
His beloved was back.
The emptiness would be filled again.
_________
Still not beta'd
Still not my native language
Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰
Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝
Ineffable kisses series : here
Ineffable Husbands masterlist : here
Ineffable Growing Love - Series post S2
Part 1 Story 1-99
Part 2 Story 100-?
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goodluckclove · 19 hours
Text
An Open Letter to a Professional Author
I came across a writer here who I imagine will probably never see this, but their presence was enough to make me pretty mad for two days now. I've decided to pen a little statement to this Long-Term, Professional, Full-Time, Published Author who makes a habit out of being deeply unpleasant in a way that apparently has only attracted an audience of other deeply unpleasant people.
People here seem to like it when I get mad. So, uh, enjoy?
Dear Professional Author,
I came across a post of yours on some feed here the other day and enjoyed your commentary. It was one of those writing memes that sort of called attention to actually writing as opposed to just thinking about your project - the kind that people usually respond to with some sort of joke expressing their repulsion at the concept.
You responded with distaste and I generally agreed. The tone was a little aggressive for me, but that kind of humor also leaves me generally confused. I personally ended up concluding that the self-deprecating humor was a coping mechanism for a larger issue that keeps these people from writing - intimidation, lack of confidence, physical or mental pain, things like that. You seemed to think it was a matter of will, which I found to be an approach that at the very least was well-intentioned.
Turns out it wasn't.
First off, I should say that this isn't about your political beliefs. Your political beliefs that are really more like general human beliefs. I don't want to get into that. Instead, I just want to talk about your writing. You are a full-time, published author, as you say in nearly post where you talk about writing. A major point of pride to you seems to be the fact that you are traditionally published. Any other method doesn't seem to be as legitimate to you. That's interesting to me.
You also don't seem to have much of an audience outside of people who mainly come to agree with your politics. I didn't really see a single positive interaction between you and another writer on here for as much as I was willing to scroll through your blog. That's also interesting to me.
I didn't spent too much time on your blog once I realized that you were definitely not the kind of person I would ever want any interaction with. What I did want to do is use your presence indirectly to prove a point that I've been wanting to get into for some time now.
To put it simply, I'll say this: a career in professional writing is not actually as cool or important as you might think it is.
Now I'll be direct and say that I've never been traditionally published for anything longer than a short story or long-term, unpaid column. You don't give any details on any of your writing, as far as I've seen (Once again - interesting!), so there's a chance you've made more in contracts and royalties than I have. But I'm a working writer. I've had a career in ghostwriting and technical writing. I've written and produced plays that have been featured in festivals in multiple states. I'm not speaking from a place of no experience, is what I mean to say.
What I also mean to say is that - while I view writing in many ways as a spiritual and healing act that I couldn't live without - it's also a job. It's not always exciting, and even when it is exciting it's only exciting to me. I consider the best date night to be when my wife works on video game development while I write my draft. I leave the house on a regular basis, but it's mainly to go to different places to write.
In short - I love to write, but I don't think it makes me cool. Or interesting. Or valuable. Or intelligent. Or just generally fun to be around and talk to. These are things I strive to cultivate in other aspects of the way I live and grow as a human being on this planet.
Being a Professional Author in one particular genre doesn't give you authority over the craft as a whole. You can't just throw yourself into conversations and start with I'm a published writer and assume that means you have the final say on any discussion. Believe it or not, in many cases it does not matter.
Lots of people are published traditionally, and it does prove some level of validity in their line of work. But there are a huge variety of people in the world of trad pub. There are people who write books in genres that don't apply to writers here. There are people who write books that aren't very good. There are even people who write trad pub books that are very good, but their careers are sullied by the fact that the authors themselves are not good people.
Being a successful writer does not mean you're a good person. Being a writer at all does not mean you are a good person. I believe in Death of the Author to an extent, but when that author insists on making a presence on a public website and doling out advice and opinions to other writers the lines start to blur considerably.
Writing is a job. You work it over a period of time and learn skills and strategies that work for you. The same applies to virtually every other job, including ones that society views as less romantic as something in the arts. Can you imagine me breaking into your home while you're making lunch and telling you how to arrange your cheese slices based on what I know as a full-time, professional sandwich artist at Subway? You might be interested based on leaning something you didn't know about a place you might've eaten at before. But that does not entitle me to your respect on its own.
I am not entitled to your respect based on how well I learned how to make a sandwich based on my hypothetical career at Subway. Just as I don't deserve it solely because I know two card tricks, can get out a variety of stains, read most of the works of the major beatniks, can make a really good carbonara, or any other specific about my life that ultimately does not play a huge part in who I am as a person.
When I am on my death bed, I hope to god the core of my character was not the fact that I typed stories from my brain until I got carpal tunnel. If my obituary begins and ends at "writer", no matter how positive the qualifier is before that, it will be the greatest failure of my life.
Because I am a writer. But that does not matter. It does not matter if you're a writer. It can be fun and enjoyable if you are, even better if you make a living at it, but it doesn't mean you'll be happy. It doesn't mean people will like you or perceive you to be the leader and teacher you might think you are. It certainly doesn't give you a free pass to throw cruelty at strangers for truly no real reason.
Professional Author, you had a chance to raise up the next generation of an industry I assume you must value. You're choosing not to, and that's fine. You don't have the obligation to. You do have the choice to not get involved and pretend to give advice that ranges from vague to untrue. You seem to be taking that responsibility very seriously.
It's like some twist on crab mentality, where instead of dragging crabs trying to escape the bucket you're swiping at anyone who tries to crawl in with you. Then, as they struggle, you're looking down at them and making comments on how easy it is to get in the bucket, if you only just do it and maybe read some books.
To all of us, I say this: question authority, even in the arts. Especially in the arts. Nobody knows as much as they say. That includes me, but I do know this - any branch of publishing feels really good. It's scary but it's fun. If you're traditional published or indie published or self published, it says nothing about how good your book is or how good you are as a writer or how valuable you are as a human being.
Don't be this lonely bucket crab. They seem mean and I'm tired of talking about them.
Best Regards,
Clove
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olderthannetfic · 1 day
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Since we've been on the same topic for quite some time, here's a new one:
I've only recently noticed this, but it seems that whenever there's a trans character in fics, they're either pre-op or it's just never mentioned and left up to reader interpretation (both in SFW and NSFW content)
I'm sure it's not always the case, but it seems to be the norm - for transmasc characters anyway, I'm not sure about transfems since I don't read nearly as many fics where that's discussed, but I imagine it's the same there.
I'm just wondering why that is. Maybe it's simply to avoid getting things wrong if the author themself doesn't know absolutely everything about how it all works, or cause a lot of trans headcanons are a bit of a self-insert and they simply write the character as being in a similar stage in their transition as them, I don't know.
It is a bit of a pet peeve, though. I get that a lot of the time, dysphoria and other trans struggles are an important part of the story, but you can depict that with a post-op character too, maybe just in slightly less obvious ways, and there's a lot of other things you could explore with that, too
From characters finally feeling at home in their body, to disappointment about lingering insecurities or dysphoria even after doing going through all that effort and doing everything they were 'supposed to', not to mention how well you could use that to add interest to sex scenes (for example it's their first time since getting surgery and now they get to explore a whole new world of sensations with their love interest, etc etc)
--
I assume it's for self-inserty or personal experience reasons, yeah.
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moash · 15 hours
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hello don't mind me i was just mass liking your posts! i hope you're having a great day i hope you don't mind this ramble but i feel you'd understand :)
so basically i've had a super long .... beef with the series so far about how it's handling racism/classism and their roles in the story so i was like hey, let me do a little fix it project! because after reading OB i was just disappointed with how it handled kaladin's arc (he's my favorite so i want to see him done justice) but also moash's arc.
anyway, i was rereading parts of WOR to get the details right, and re-reading Moash talk about what happened to his family and how he just returned and they were all gone BROKE MY HEARTTTT. i also noticed how he was so ready to put in the work during training to get good at using swords and shardblades. like he had CONVICTION to succeed and i loved that about him.
so moash literally went from a character i didn't mind on my first read to becoming one of my favorites and now i just get so upset thinking about like how the series is painting him so far. i bring this up because i was like dang, if i'm this pressed about it, i can't imagine tumblr-user-moash's feelings about it. anyway here's to hoping that SA5 does him justice. also moash for bondsmith is brilliant. also thank you for defending him 😌 sorry if this is repetitive but do you feel optimistic that a redemption arc could happen for him in SA5?
mass likers are like being visited by angels, i love youuu 💕 and i would love to read your fix-it if you ever post it 👀
as for sa5. haha. i try to keep really optimistic about it. i am a writer myself and everything that i believe about writing good stories tells me that he basically has to be redeemed, even if it’s right before his death (cliche, but it would at least still fulfill the assignment). right? because the themes of redemption for the entire story would be just completely thrown out in a major way if he wasn’t, not to mention that every moash pov chapter that revealed his complex feelings about his choices and his current situation would have been made essentially pointless and time-wasting. like i don’t see from an objective writing standpoint how the story could be good if he wasn’t redeemed, and that keeps me going more than anything else, because while i have a lot of issues with sanderson’s writing, i don’t think he’s just plain stupid, right? so yea, that’s what keeps me going.
however!!! he has really dropped the ball with regards to racism/classism/etc in stormlight, so while this would i think be his biggest fumble yet, it’s not entirely impossible to see some truly bad stuff happen in moash’s arc in sa5. but i try to keep optimistic and keep my expectations relatively low (like death bed redemption would suck but i guess i would ultimately be ok with it, sigh)
sorry that i forgot to answer this for so long, and thank you for stopping by!! 🥰💕
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inbrightshadows · 8 months
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*pretends it hasn't been like two weeks* 😎 I wanted to wait until I had more written but alas, le writers block. but never mind that, it's turtle baby Jr time 🔫 Sprays you with juice that makes you go read SomeRandomDude's Cas Apocalyptic series because it's very fun and I like it.
[Part 1]
“Hm. Well it’s not on fire,” Donatello says as he steps into the perfectly normal looking kitchen. The younger turtles keep their eyes firmly away from the cabinet Donnie shoved Casey Jr and his containment mug into. Thankfully, Casey seems to be being cooperative and quiet at the moment. Maybe he fell asleep, Leo thinks.
“Pffft of course it’s not on fire. Anyway you wanted coffee? I think April brought us some fancy stuff? I want some too, lets use that.” “M-hm, sounds good…”
Leo ignores the feeling of Donatello’s eyes drilling into the back of his head and opens up a cupboard that doesn’t contain a secret baby mutant nephew turtle. He pulls out the nice coffee April gifted them and starts measuring it into the coffee maker.
Out of the corner of his eye he watches Donatello raise an eyebrow at the cutting boards spread over the counter containing minced up fish meat and a single strawberry.
“Trying a new recipe, Mini-Mikey?” Mikey jolts. Leo is abruptly reminded of something. Donatello is, or was(?), Donnie until the whole apocalypse thing. At the very least he had exactly the same childhood.
Which means he knows exactly which brother to press.
“Oh, uh-uh-” Mikey stutters and squeaks. “I mean- yeah! I was just, y’know, I thought I’d do something a little… different?” Mikey’s head slowly sinks into his shell until only his eyes show. “Well I’ve got no idea what it might be but I’m sure it won’t… disappoint me.”
If you were to hold a lying competition Mikey won't take last place. That honor goes to Donnie followed by Raph. Mikey would sit at a comfortable third with April beating him out for second, leaving Leo to claim the title of Best Liar of his siblings. April and Mikey would tie but Mikey has one significant weakness that lets April beat him out every time. He can't stand to disappoint the people he cares about.
“You would never do something to deliberately disappoint me. Right?” Donatello grins at Mikey, all teeth. Mikey rings his hands together, the rest of his body frozen.
Leo smacks the buttons to set the coffee machine running and bolts to rescue Mikey.
He tries for a smooth slide up to sling an arm over Mikey’s shoulder but a hand catches him by the shell. Donatello lifts him just as effortlessly as Raph ever has, and keeps him there, dangling in the air.
“Mikey.” Donatello sets a heavy hand on Mikey’s  shoulder, sending his head retracting another inch. “Is there something you need to tell me?” he says it with the same voice Dad always does when he’s lying about them not being in trouble. Leo tries desperately to motion for Mikey to not give in- he can still totally salvage this- but it’s too late.
“Ahhhhhhh- DONNIE ACCIDENTALLY TURNED CASEY INTO A BABY TURTLE MUTANT!” Mikey wails. “He what?” Donatello’s head snaps toward Donnie, all but hidden behind a board stiff Raph.  
“You left your lab open!” Donnie sputters, indignant. “My lab- did you touch the test tube on the desk?” “We put him in a mug!” Mikey wails, fully retracting into his shell “A mug. You put him in- Wait.” Donatello looks at their empty hands. A dawning horror grows on his face. “What mug? None of you are holding a mug. Where is the mug?”
Donatello finally drops Leo in favor of whipping around and grabbing Raph by the shoulders. “Where did you put the mug?”
“Uhhhh Donnie shoved it in the cupboards!” “You left him unattended?” Donatello yells, already ripping off cupboard doors. “My kitchen!” Mikey squawks, popping out of his shell and leaping up to hang off Donatello’s arm. “My nephew!” Donatello retorts.
Three cupboards meet their demise before Leo manages to scramble over to the correct one, yank it open, and carefully pick up the mug containing Casey Jr.
“Quit wreaking the kitchen! Look, it’s fine, see?” Leo holds the mug out in two careful hands, one under and one over just in case Casey decides to try and jump again.
Donatello snatches the mug, ignoring Leo’s hissed “Careful!” like he’s heard it a thousand times. He stares down into it, not moving a muscle. Leo doesn’t even think he’s breathing.
“...Ok I know he’s adorable but I think holding your breath is a bit-” “This is the mug you put him in?” “Uh. Yeah?” “This mug right here?” “Well technically Donnie put him in it but-” “This mug, right here, which is empty.”
ehehehehe There's a baby turtle mutant loose in the lair! No one knows what to do, least of all CJ! He's never been in a lair before! [what the vibes of the next part will be like]
[this is where part 5 will someday go, when it will come nobody knows]
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bookshelf-in-progress · 2 months
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It's so nice to have this tiny little selection of WIPs to prioritize. Really helps me to keep my focus where it should be.
Wait, what's this?
IT'S A LONG-ABANDONED WIP WITH A STEEL CHAIR!!
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artsyjesseblue · 1 year
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I feel sorry for the poor soul at DW who had to draw over Lotor in this scene. Studio Mir's style is not as easy as it looks, LOL.
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Who has the pointier chin?
I’ll let the pics do the talk.
(OK, giving u some hints- no 1: in VLD there are different degrees of pointiness for each visage. There's a certain angle to their V-shaped chins, and it varies from one character to another - Allura, Pidge, Lance, Lotor, Keith etc.)
(Hint no 2: Compare the pink and the blue outlines)
In conclusion...
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If anything, mommy here probably says "You deserved better".
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aleki-lives-here · 1 month
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I watched an mdzs animatic with a song from wicked, and something in my mind finally clicked and now I want to scream about how similar my current and my past hyperfixations are.
"Good news, the witch is dead!" like
"No good deeds" is such a "character pushed to their limits" song. Imagine it before the nightless city. The first scream, as Wen Ning and Wen Qing walk away. The chanting as he lies there, unable to move, praying for them to be well. Memories of people he loves: Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli, Lan Zhan, the Wen siblings.
"Was I really seeking good, or just seeking attention?" -- as he looks at the burial mounds and leaves.
"If I cannot succeed, Fiero, saving you, I promise no good deed will I attempt to do again." -- as he learns about Wen Qing and Wen Ning's death.
Ending with him arriving at Nightless city and pulling out the flute.
I want to see it animated so much!
My skills are so annoyingly not up to the task. Maybe if my hyperfixation survives long enough that I learn drawing and animating things well? It'll be the third mdzs animatic I really wish to do one day. Maybe one day.
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lady-lycany · 1 month
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When your maladaptive daydreaming has been so intense again for a while, that your brain tricks you into missing things that literally never happened in the first place 🗿👍
Just had that and was like "🥺🥺😪😔...🤨🤔😀❓❓"
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