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#i have never and i am not going to start now
racew1nn3rs · 3 days
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─ 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘪. (𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦) 🍊
⤷ summary: saudi arabian and australian grands prix happen! y/n starts making vlogs for the races and it reveals more about her and a certain driver's feelings than she hoped, not that she notices. poor oscar's stuck in the middle of it all but he's trying his best!
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liked by f1, landonorris, and 55,007 others
tagged landonorris and oscarpiastri
mclaren saudi arabia, you were beautiful even if the results weren't! ready for what's to come
12,567 comments
user1 admin not using a single nice photo of the drivers 😭
user2 admin be honest is this your revenge era
mclaren well, yes!
user3 HELP MEEEE
user4 the way lando looks at her 😭
user5 this is a place of business
user6 oscar looks petrified 💀
mclaren dw guys we're still training him!
oscarpiastri wtf why would u say it like that, i'm not a dog
mclaren full-time team mascot, part time driver
user7 admin drop the insta your so pretty 😭😭
user8 no literally, content of her WHERE
mclaren ynusername 🤲🏼
user9 LETS FUCKING GO
user10 HER DISSING HER OWN TEAM 💀 THEY'RE GONNA FIRE YOU GIRL
mclaren they don't pay me to LIE
user11 CRAZYY
user12 LANDO IS NEVER GETTING A GOOD PIC EVER AGAIN 😭
mclaren what can i say, i am no mans peace 🥱
user13 icon
landonorris reporting you to hr
mclaren for what
landonorris idk harrassment or something
mclaren ok keyboard warrior, lets calm down 💀
user14 KEYBOARD WARRIOR HELEPSJSM
user15 i vote admin just takes over and we don't even get driver pictures
user16 real and true
user17 i fear we may have lost the plot
user18 thoughts on today's results
mclaren i'm trying to be positive in general but man
user19 LMAOOOOO
user20 ik the pr department is shaking in their boots after every post notif
mclaren probably! but unfortunately for everyone, i am going to keep doing whatever i want
user21 no more lando beef, mclaren admin?
mclaren i forget but i never forgive. i forgot why we were fighting but i stay hating bitches 🥱
landonorris literally WHAT DID I DO
mclaren IDK BUT IK U PISSED ME OFF 🫵
oscarpiastri diabolical photo choice
oscarpiastri i look like a little kid on picture day
mclaren so basically your everyday look
oscarpiastri yk what you are making this work environment very hostile
mclaren i can make it more hostile if you want 🤨
oscarpiastri nevermind!!!
maxfewtrell most flattering lando picture i've seen in years
mclaren that's saying something isn't it 🤩
user22 i went to haterville and they all knew you admin
mclaren they actually just elected me mayor there!!! 💪🏻
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liked by bsfusername, landonorris, and 17,800 others
ynusername if my admin duties don't kill me, i promise my caffeine addiction will! (:
3,422 comments
user23 be honest, how many coffees have you had today
ynusername 3!
user24 oh that's not that bad
ynusername +5
user24 JESUS CHRSUT
bsfusername at this point i think meth would be healthier
ynusername honestly yeah
ynusername thanks for the suggestion!!
user25 nooo admin don't do meth ur so sexy aha
ynusername that just made me want to do meth more
landonorris so what i'm hearing is buying you an espresso machine would get me in your good graces 😇
user26 oh brother here he goes
ynusername you must be deaf then
landonorris 😔 2 espresso machines?
ynusername i don't want ur dirty espresso machines 🙄
oscarpiastri now what car is that 🫵
ynusername SHHHHH
oscarpiastri TRAITOR
bsf2username when your not busy being super sexy on a race track, can we go thrifting and get sweetgreen and overpriced coffee 🙏🏼🙏🏼
ynusername this could've been an email, get this out of my comments 💀
ynusername but yeah obviously
user27 admin vlogs when 😔
ynusername SOON!!! very very soon
user28 mother feeding us once again
ynusername brb, adding single mom who works two jobs, loves her kids, and never stops to my resume
danielricciardo coffee recipe where?
ynusername in your dms now ‼️
danielricciardo is this flirting
ynusername no if i was flirting i would've told you to ask me in person, i'm just being charitable
landonorris can i get the coffee recipe too then 🤲🏼
ynusername wdy want next, my mugs? keep on walking charity case
user29 CHARITY CASE IS CRAZYDFHAJ
user30 she's so effortlessly funny and mean i love her
user31 i feel like this is so unprofessional /:
ynusername babe professional where, you are on??? my personal?? account???
user32 maybe she's born with it, maybe it's the fact that she's consumed enough caffeine to tranquelize a horse
user33 oh please the horse would be dead
ynusername call an ambulance, BUT NOT FOR ME ‼️💪🏻🗣️
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ynusername posted to story!
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(caption: melbourne vlog out now on youtube, go watch!!)
15,221 replies
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"This thing better be working," could be heard slightly muffled in between vague shuffling sounds. After a second or two of incoherent noise, the camera footage finally came on. Y/N smiled at herself in the camera as the recording light blinked to life, and raised her hand victoriously. She grabbed the smile microphone in front of her and laughed, "It looks like everything is working. Thank God, I wouldn't have known how to fix it otherwise."
"Alright everybody, welcome to the first race weekend vlog hosted by me! Your favorite McLaren admin and social manager. It took me forever to figure out how I wanted to go about this, but now I think I settled on a format that will work," She explained as she walked around the small, clean kitchen that was within frame of the camera. She pulled a glass jar out of her cabinets and left it on the counter before pulling a jug of cold brew and a cartridge of milk out of her fridge.
"It is currently 7:30 A.M on March 29th, and I have a flight to Melbourne in 3 hours. I'm already packed and ready for this weekend, but I wanted to get an introduction filmed and I wanted to take a shower before I left." Y/N paused for a moment as she poured the coffee into her mason jar until she seemed satisfied and began to add some milk. "I am totally exhausted so this is probably cup one of like," she laughed, "I don't know seven probably. And this is a pretty big jar I won't lie."
"The race weekend doesn't technically start until Friday, so I'll be getting there a bit early, but I wanted to film some content before the race weekend gets really hectic, so McLaren is sending me a little bit earlier. I'm excited though! I love the heat, even if I live in London the antithesis of Australian weather," she taste-tested her coffee and hummed in delight.
"God I really never miss with this stuff," she said contently. "Anyway, it's a bit of an early start today, but I'll have plenty of time to sleep on the fight. I mean can you believe that London to Melbourne is a nearly 22 hours," she scoffed. "I vote that we start making all of the races in one place so I don't have to feel jet lag more painful than the force of 1,000 suns every other weekend. Not that I'm complaining," she chuckled awkwardly, "I love my job McLaren please don't fire me."
Abruptly an orange tabby cat came into the frame of the camera, causing Y/N to abruptly grab her glass jar in the hopes of avoiding a mess. She gasped, but laughed as the cat scampered off as quickly as it had come. She shook her head fondly.
"That, ladies and gentleman, was Cali! My cat. She's literally my baby, and I love her more than anything else on this earth. However, she does have an affinity for hitting things off of counters and breaking them. She also hates men and nearly all other animals, so she's basically the world's biggest hazard to society. She's a good girl, I love her." Y/N explained between sips of coffee as she stared wistfully past the the frame of the camera, where it could be assumed Cali had gone.
Abruptly an alarm went off and Y/N threw her head back with a groan.
"That means I have to get in the shower and get ready so I can leave on time," she said, before taking a few more sips of coffee. "I'm going to go do that, and the next time you'll hear my beautiful voice will be at the Melbourne Airport! Cue the travel montage!"
An assortment of clips follow. Y/N is seen dragging her luggage through Heathrow Airport. Y/N is seen ordering another coffee at the airport, finishing the coffee, and ordering another before her flight. Y/N is seen responding to emails from her airplane seat, editing video footage, and responding to instragram and twitter comments. Footage is shown outside the plane window of a cloudy, blue sky and a time lapse is shown as the sky grows beautiful shades of pink and red before becoming a starry-night sky. Y/N is seen cozy in a throw blanket and a travel pillow, presumably asleep with headphones on. Y/N is shown pulling her luggage through the airport once again, with a brand new coffee cup in hand. She smiles, taking a sip before she is seen settled down in a seat in the bustling airport.
"Twenty-two or so hours later and I have finally landed in Melbourne. I'm waiting for my Uber to get here so I can finally be taken to my hotel to drop my stuff off. I have a meeting with the McLaren drivers in two hours, but luckily I slept really well on the plane. I don't know how else I would be able to deal with Lando Norris. I'm going to finish this coffee in order to maximize my tolerance for the next few hours, but I suspect I'll be getting a new coffee before I reach that meeting. My addiction truly knows no bounds," she laughs, trying to ignore the people vaguely shown within frame that are staring at her speaking to a camera.
The camera cuts abruptly and the waiting screen from SpongeBob flashes on the screen, including the narrator's voice reading "2 hours later."
Y/N is shown once again in new clothes, a new coffee cup in hand, and luggage replaced by a small canvas bag. Her comfortable plane clothes have been swapped out for jean shorts and a plain white tank-top. Her hair is clipped back out of her face, and she is adorned with simple gold jewelry and light makeup.
Y/N smiles at the camera as she walks, bustling and talking heard around her, before whispering into the small microphone, "I have arrived at the McLaren garage. It is now time to meet with Lord Lando and workplace mascot Oscar Piastri," the titles slip off her tongue sarcastically and she doesn't bother suppressing an eye-roll.
In the next clip, Oscar and Lando are seen seated on either side of her as they sit in what seems like a board-room. Lando leans over and whispers something that the camera doesn't pick up and Oscar laughs while Y/N grimaces and reaches forward to readjust the camera. When the camera comes back on, Lando and Oscar are seated together on the left of Y/N as she faces on angle toward both them and the camera.
"Don't just sit there and look pretty, say hello to the camera boys," Y/N says and Oscar cackles at the disgruntled look on Lando's face.
"Is that your way of calling me pretty Y/N," Lando chokes out between laughs, and Y/N scoffs with an eye-roll.
"I was actually talking about Oscar, but whatever floats your little papaya boat Norris," Y/N deadpans and Oscar doubles over from the force of his laughter at the pout on Lando's face.
"That's not nice at all, I hope you know that. I think I am sitting here very prettily, thank you very much," Lando says, leaning into the girl next to him to speak into her microphone.
Y/N draws the microphone back, swatting him away, "Yes, yes quite prettily," Y/N mocks in a British accent.
Oscar, still trying to recover, joins in, "Pretty little Lando Norris," and Y/N laughs jovially, reaching across Lando as if the boy weren't there to high-five the Austrialian driver.
"Bullies, the lot of you," Lando mumbles and Y/N brushes off his comment without response before finally facing the camera.
"Anyway, welcome to the first McLaren race weekend vlog. I'm Y/N L/N, the best media manager in the whole god damn world, and this is Lando Norris, the biggest pain in my ass, and Oscar Piastri, the second biggest pain in my ass. How are you feeling about Melbourne boys?" Y/N questions, transitioning smoothly much to the British driver's chagrin.
"Feeling proud to be the second biggest pain in the ass and not the first. Probably the only time i've been glad to get second actually," Oscar comments and Y/N laughs as Lando shakes his head in disappointment.
"But in all seriousness it is good to be home, this is easily my favorite race of the year seeing as it's my home race and i'm looking forward to, hopefully, good results from our team," Oscar supplies and Y/N nods along to his words.
"Yes, Australia, we are in you and we are happy about it," both boys choked out a laugh at the manager's sexual innuendo and Oscar quickly covered his mouth with his hand so as not to react too much. "What about you Lando what are you feeling," Y/N questioned, leaning the small microphone to the boy.
"Feeling like that was a stupid joke. And also like I am going to be getting P1 this weekend. I can feel it in my bones."
"Leave my jokes alone Lando, you're not being paid to be a critic," she scoffed, "and if I recall, you said the same thing in Saudi Arabia not that long ago. What's changed now?"
Lando rolled his eyes, "What's changed is that we're in Australia now and I'm feeling much more confident."
"Well thank god for that," Y/N supplied unhelpfully as Oscar laughed.
"Now, what we really came here for, it's time to film a video for this channel, it's going to be a fan Q and A, I picked the questions. By the time this vlog is up, the QnA should've already been posted. So feel free to stop watching this and to go watch that or whatever," Y/N commented. "After that we're going to film a TikTok challenge," both and Lando and Oscar grimaced, but Y/N ignored their dismay at the idea of fiming yet another TikTok, so cue the montage! Filming time!" Y/N exclaimed and the screen transitioned to a new series of clips.
In the first clip Oscar and Lando were sitting in two chairs while Y/N sat across from them with a set of notecards.
"Lando, this question from user "ln4mania" asks, "Are you and admin actually friends? Or is the online beef real? The people demand answers!" Y/N reads off with a laugh.
"Do you hear that, the people demand answers Lando! Don't keep them waiting!" Oscar and Y/N laugh as Lando shakes his head and tucks his face into his hands.
"There is no beef, guys. Me and admin, or rather me and Y/N are just fine. We hadn't even actually met when that happened," Lando supplied between laughs. Y/N looked at the camera and rolled her eyes with a shake of her head, faux-disagreeing with the boy.
She ignored the simmering pit of disappointment in her stomach. She did in fact have a problem with entitled little Lando Norris who still gave her side-eyed looks and judgmental stares whenever he saw her. If that wasn't humiliating enough, Oscar had clearly noticed it too, which just gave Y/N the feeling that she wasn't being taken seriously at all now that Oscar understood Lando's lack of respect for Y/N. However that didn't matter in the current moment. All that mattered was making this video.
The next clip showed Lando and Oscar sitting at a table with bowls of water in front of them and towels strewn across a chair just within frame of the camera. Y/N stood behind them, hands rested in their hair as she reacted to the prompts being read by someone, an unnamed media intern, off-camera.
"Who is harder to make videos with?" The intern asked and Y/N huffed out a laugh as she let her hands fully grasp Lando's curls and push him into the water quickly. He sputtered, trying to blink the water out of his eyes as Y/N laughed at the wet-puppy dog look he was sporting.
Y/N tried to shake the ridiculous desire to let her hands run through the soft curls underneath her finger tips. Curse Lando and whatever stupidly good, rich-person hair routine he used that made him smell good and look good, and... whatever.
Lando, blinking water out of his eyes, was now undoubtedly certain that being damn-near waterboarded was worth it if it meant that Y/N would laugh like that again. He knew Oscar would harass him again later for being "down-bad" or something along those lines- as he had done every time he caught the man staring-, but as he caught a glimpse of Y/N's bright smile and shaking shoulders, he found he didn't really care.
The next clip showed Oscar, Lando, Y/N, and a laughing media intern as they all dried off- somehow all having become wet through the course of filming. Y/N dried herself off quickly, taking a sip of her newly refilled coffee, not seeing the way that only the camera and Oscar saw Lando stared at her until the driver was nudged back into focus on drying himself off.
A title-card once again came on the screen with white words on a photo collage of Australian grand-prix candids that Y/N had taken, reading "Race montage? More likely than you'd think."
Footage was shown of the free practice sessions. Oscar and Lando getting in and out of their cars. Engineers along the pit wall going over data. The team speaking incoherently, going over the game plan for Sunday's race. Oscar and Lando greeting fans, signing merch, and posing for photos. Y/N smiling and waving at a cheering crowd of people before staring at the camera incredulously with a small caption reading: "Omg she's famous your honor". More clips showed Lando laughing as Oscar tossed grapes and Lando moved to catch them with his mouth. Lando nearly choking as Y/N cackled in the background. Multiple clips showing Y/N with a fresh coffee, and another... and another, as Oscar's face in the background grew with concern. Zak Brown explaining to Y/N the dangers of caffeine overdose, and the need for moderation. Y/N explaining to Zak Brown that without coffee she would simply collapse and die, which the camera showed did nothing to ease her concern. Y/N getting caps signed by the drivers for fans and walking away with intricate friendship bracelets decorating her wrists.
And finally footage of the race. The engineers in the garage. The pit-crew changing tires. The cars racing past as Y/N watched attentively. Footage of the crowd as they cheered when the cars whizzed past. Smiling faces of fans. Y/N's cheers as Oscar and Lando passed. The smiling faces of McLaren employees as Lando and Oscar crossed the checkered flag in P6 and P8 respectively.
Y/N accepting hugs from both drivers, ignoring the burning sensation in her stomach as Lando wrapped his arms around her with a smile and a laugh. Y/N calling Lando smelly and telling him to go wash off if he wants to hug her next time, and him rolling his eyes at her fondly before making a face at the camera. The podium celebration is shown and Y/N smiles as the anthem plays, even though it's not for her own team.
The final clip is shown of Y/N in her hotel room, comfortable in sweats as she sits on the unmade bed.
"Not bad results this week guys! P6 for Lando and P8 for Oscar, which are good points for the team. I'm happy on my end, I think we got some good content filmed, and I am now ready to go to sleep so I can get home to Cali and my own bed quicker. I hope you enjoyed this video, and if you didn't don't tell me because I don't care!" Y/N jokes with a smile.
"Hopefully I will see you all at the next race, if not the race after that! Bye papaya fans, and be sure to follow us on instagram and all of the other social platforms!" Y/N exclaimed, gesturing to the list of the social media handles that appeared on her right hand side.
And with that, the camera cut to black.
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liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1, and 29,145 others
ynusername afraid to report that i fought jetlag and lost 😔 i did sleep for 25 hours straight after melbourne and i had no clue where i was when i woke up! shout out cali for waking me up 🙏🏼 best friend frl
9,547 comments
bsfusername i'm going to try not to be offended by that caption (love you bb cali) but FUCK YOU CAUSE I BOUGHT YOUR ASS BREAKFAST
ynusername my bad! s/o to that bomb ass omlette 🤩
bsfusername never doing shit for you again
user34 that vlog was god tier, how long did that take
ynusername it took 7 hours of editing and years off my life, thanks so much for asking 🥳
maxverstappen1 thanks again for those podium photos! you have a gift for photography 💪🏻
ynusername don't mention it! 👍🏼
ynusername (no seriously, mclaren might behead me)
mclaren beheading is so last year. firing squad. 🗣️
user35 not y/n threatening herself 💀
oscarpiastri suprised your body didn't naturally wake up for coffee
ynusername it did! just 25 hours later
user36 your poor cat was literally starving for a whole day? youre a horrible owner
ynusername let me introduce you to god's greatest creation: the automatic feeder!!! i'm sure they can mail one to whatever fucking rock you live under!
user37 PERIODDDD
user38 me personally? i'd never log on again
user39 she needs a personal channel 🙏🏼🙏🏼 i'd subscribe
user40 her cat is so cute 😭😭😭 gimme that
ynusername 🫵 STAY BACK HEATHEN, NO ONE TOUCHES CALI AND LIVES
user40 my bad fam 🧍🏻‍♀️
user41 i want someone to love me as much as she loves that mean ass cat
landonorris don't you have a job to be doing 💀💀 she slept through a full work day
user42 lando always on her ass and for whattttt
user43 obsessed obsessed obsessed
ynusername i had the day off! but not the guy who was streaming video games coming for me 🥱 talking bout get a job
user44 lando and y/n beefing on insta again? we're so back
user45 at this point instagram comment beef isn't enough, they need to duel or some shit
user46 the caffeine addiction almost got her guys
ynusername i wish it would, then i wouldn't have to work with lando's annoying ass
landonorris I CAN SEE YOUR COMMENTS???
ynusername THAT'S THE POINT
user47 honestly just give her a gun atp, these men test her too damn much
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user48 NURSE 🫵 SHE'S RIGHT HERE
user49 no fr, like let's get back to bed grandma
user50 OP, are you concussed?
user51 no actually cause didn't y/n just say she wanted to khs working with him 💀💀
pastryboy81 that sign can't stop me, because i can't read!
user53 OK I ACTUALLY SEE THE VISION
user54 ARE YOUR EYES CLOSED???!1!1
user55 i fear i totally get it 😔
user56 it's giving enemies to lovers, secret relationship type vibe lowkkkk
user57 no deadass like he hugged her reallll tight
user58 she also hugged oscar 😭😭?? and he has a whole gf
user59 the way she shoved him off and told him he reeked not 5 seconds after 💀 delusion is a disease yall
user60 someone call the f1 gossip pages cause 😗
user61 more like someone call the ward cause somethings real off with yall 🤨
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sorry that this update took forever, i had surgery and recovery has been rougher than i expected! hope you enjoy!!
please leave your thoughts in the comments and feel free to drop a request for your fav in my asks <3
-
𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩
@lemon-lav @slutforpopculture @m4rt10ne @urfavsgf @sadsierra2 @96jnie @sltwins @poppyflower-22 @alliumiae @livelovesports @liberty-barnes @the-holy-trinity-l @iliwyss @awritingtree @redpool @elliotts1one @velentine @chaoticmessneutralplease @5sospenguinqueen @charizznorizz @2pagenumb @mxdi0 @cwiphswmwasohmm @tremendousstarlighttragedy @lnspipedrm @itseightbeats @tinycoffeeroom @woozarts @personwhoisther @a-beaverhausen @love-simon @annabellelee @ravisinghs-wife @chezmardybum @greantii @weekendlusting @monserelates @sapphiccloud @halleest @deamus-liv @gigigreens @morenofilm @laneyspaulding19 @lanireadss @dear-fifi @moldyshorts1997 @oliviarodrigostan13 @eugene-emt-roe @ilivbullyingjeongin @im-a-ghost666
1K notes · View notes
eamour · 3 days
Text
avoid any action.
with manifesting, there comes an intrusive urge to act. a deep need to do something to get something. we often try to change our world or ourselves through actions. however, we don’t alter or attain things with the use of our bodies. we can only ever achieve things with the use of our MINDS.
! this post was partially inspired by @sparklingself and her post called "do nothing" !
law of assumption.
let’s take a look at what the law of assumption states.
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law of assumption
/lɔː/ /ɒv,əv/ /əˈsʌm(p)ʃn/
"the law of assumption postulates that the assumptions of an individual shape and create one's physical reality."
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so, what does that mean? how does this help us?
mentally, not physically.
just like assumptions take place in the mind, so does everything related to manifestation. after all, manifestation is forever done in the mind, and not with the body. all events that have taken place physically, first took place mentally. everything external used to be internal. conversely, you can only put out what you already put in.
in conclusion, you cannot DO anything. there is nothing for you to perform, nothing for you to execute, nothing for you to accomplish. you can only BE. so, in order to become someone new, to coerce something into BEING, you need to refrain from taking any action. let go of all efforts to alter the physical. instead, alter the mental.
mental and physical in contrast.
okay, alright, but what if you still try to physically achieve your goals? how about we try to prove the law wrong. let's say you want to get xyz while being in a negative mindset in relation to xyz. you don’t really believe in getting xyz, nor do you believe in yourself. but if you try your best physically, it should still workout, right?
nope. and i'll tell you why. you can never alter yourself with an act in opposition to your belief. your desired version of self cannot be attained by force. you cannot force yourself to achieve something while already knowing you won't or can't. if it isn’t already withIN you, it won’t and can't be withOUT you.
on the other hand, that version of yourself with your current mindset in that present state is NEVER going to achieve xyz. because that version of you is tied to that self concept, that state and that reality. creation is finished, meaning, this reality is finished. it’s forever going to look like that. you are forever going to be like that. ONLY if you change your state from within, you can ensure a change from without. that’s when you shift your state of mind, and therefore, your physical reality. you cannot physically shift. you need to mentally shift. because no matter HOW much you try to make reality B (undesired) look like reality A (desired), it won’t ever change the fact that you are still experiencing reality B.
externally dependent action.
now, what about the 3D? what if i am changing my assumptions but don’t experience them physically yet? this part is very important for any of you who are thinking of completely turning your back on your 3D, who feel overwhelmed by it or don’t know how to deal with it.
1 · first of all, you are doing great. keep doing it.
2 · second of all, living in the end and focusing on embodying your desired version of self does not mean that you start refusing to LIVE. you aren’t supposed to deny or reject your human experience when it’s not convenient for you. you are still going to do your chores, have your responsibilities, attend school, go to work, and so on. in your mind, however, you are being who YOU want to be and have what YOU want to have. it’s about knowing the external world is going to change because it has to, plus balancing experiencing both worlds. in the end, your outer world will show you how your inner world looks like.
often times, suddenly abandoning yourself in the physical world will only harm you because then it will only be harder for you to dismiss the negative parts of your reality. it usually makes things a lot more draining and challenging.
physical techniques and methods.
this is just gonna serve as a reminder: techniques and methods are only there to help. they aide you to obtain a feeling of "naturalness" in correlation to your desires. they don’t do the manifesting. actually, they have no power on their own. you know who does the manifesting? YOU. you and only you. thus, you can do a method 111 times and still not manifest your desire because your assumptions say otherwise. everything you manifest with the support of a method or technique can be traced back to you, moreover your MIND's power. not your bodies power, and certainly not your hands ability to write down a script 123 times.
"there is no need to do something. don’t do anything. because if you WERE who you wanted to be, all you would do is experience BEING it. you wouldn’t DO anything." — edward art
don’t change it. let it be changed.
with love, ella.
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cutieleclerc · 1 day
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Matchmaker | LN4
lando norris x fem!reader, background lestappen
summary: you try getting involved in max and charles' love lives, and it turns out they're also trying to get involved in yours
At the age of 21 years old, you joined McLaren after becoming a champion in all the junior categories. This made you the first woman in modern F1, and the first woman in several decades. And if people thought that Lando had a lot of energy, they had not met you yet.
Now that your rookie season was halfway done with, you've learned two important things. 1) Lando was very easy to get along with and 2) Max and Charles were certainly in love. 
There were a couple times when you had been on the podium with them, and of course you loved being on the podium, but having to third wheel that pair would drive anyone insane. 
So, when you got back from the summer break, you decided to make it your mission to get them together. Step 1 was telling Lando about your plans.
"Landooo!" you called out as you saw him walking in the paddock up ahead, running to catch up with him. 
"Hey, Y/n/n," he greeted you with a handshake. 
"I have a plan," you said devilishly. 
"Shit, that can never be good."
"Hey! Hear me out. So, Charles and Max, you know?"
"Who? I've never heard of those people in my life," he said sarcastically. 
"Ooookay, I could do without the attitude, thanks. Anyways, I'm sure you've noticed how in love with each other they are. Like hello? They literally scream 'enemies to lovers' trope. You know what I mean? I just need to find a way to get them to confess their undying love for each other." 
Lando's eyes widened and he looked around, making sure that no one was listening before pulling you to the side.
"Oh—jeez, so, you in?"
"The entire grid has been trying to get them together for years, you think that you'll be able to do it?"
"Yeah, obviously, but I'll need a sidekick that's why I'm telling you, so...?" 
He sighed. "Alright, tell me your ideas."
"Yes!"
"But I'm not your sidekick, we're partners in crime, okay?"
"Sure, sure. Anyways, step 1 of 'el plan' is to just subtly start mentioning Max or Charles when in conversation with the other. Get them in each others brains, you know? Like 'Oh Max was saying how he hopes for rain.'
Then, step 2, we start mentioning things that they've said about each other. 'Hey Max, Charles was saying how he always loves his on track battles with you the most,' stuff like that. Then we have to start interrogating them about their love life so they can hopefully admit their feelings. That's all I got so far."
Lando nodded, deep in thought. "Okay, this could work, this could work."
~~~~~~~~~~
Charles won in Monza, with Max and yourself completing the podium. While you were getting your interview done, the two of them seemed to be locked in their "debrief".
"Am I the only one who's noticed all the chemistry between her and Lando?" Max asked.
"You're definitely not the only one, mate. Being in a press conference with those two is unbearable."
"Ugh, yes, like just kiss already. I'm glad I'm not going crazy. We need to do something about it, get them to confess their feelings."
"I agree," Charles replied, staring into Max's eyes. 
~~~~~~~~~~
Later, they were in the press conference room, waiting for it to start, and Max and Charles were chatting away.
Y/n: MATE
Y/n: HELP
Y/n: I CAN'T TAKE THIS THIRD WHEELING
Landhoe: you can't complain you got a podium
Y/n: i actually can complain, i've suffered too much
Landhoe: you like seeing them together, don't lie. 
You grinned at that, then glanced up from your phone to see Max and Charles looking at you. 
"Who you texting?" Max asked.
"Just Lando," you shrugged, confused as Charles and Max gave each other a look.
"You guys seem to be getting along well, no?" Charles asked. 
"Uh yeah, I guess. It helps that we're both pretty similar."
"Yes, yes, very similar," Max nodded, and you raised your eyebrow, side-eyeing them. 
"Anyway, you guys have anyone special in your life, yet?" you asked.
The smirk on Max's face faltered as he glanced at Charles for a millisecond before looking back to her. 
"No, not yet, mate."
"Me neither," Charles added. 
You hummed. "Hm, okay."
~~~~~~~~~~
In Suzuka, Lando and you were talking while walking towards the driver's parade. 
"So I'm going to talk to Charles and you're going to talk to Max, sounds good?"
"Yup, I know the plan," Lando confirmed. 
"Great, we'll debrief after the race."
You spotted Charles and quickly ran up next to him before someone else could start a conversation with him. 
"Hey, Charlie! Congrats on your podium in Singapore!"
"Thanks, mate."
"Man, it's crazy how fast the season flew by, it seems like just yesterday I was a scared little rookie rolling up in Bahrain. Anyway, I was hoping to get your advice on something," you said, trying not to bring up the topic too suddenly. 
"Yeah, of course, go ahead."
"Okay, well, let's say hypothetically in a situation where you like someone, but you're not sure if they like you back, and you don't want to say anything because it could ruin your friendship and it would be awkward because you have to see them for the majority of the year, what would you do?" you asked, trying to gauge his feelings about potentially confessing his feelings. 
Charles glanced somewhere behind you, and you didn't want to look but you would've bet a million bucks that it was at Max.
"Well, if you're feeling like that person even just maybe likes you back, I say go for it. You wouldn't want to waste precious time that you could be spending together because you were too scared."
"So you're saying that if you like someone, you should just go for it?" you confirmed. 
"Yeah."
"Interesting..." you rubbed your chin, then turned to look at Max behind you. 
Meanwhile, Lando and Max were deep in conversation. 
"What would you think if two of the drivers started dating? Cause some of these people have some real chemistry," Lando asked, trying to seem nonchalant. 
Max shrugged. "I mean, yeah, some of us have known each other since our childhoods. I wouldn't be surprised if some crushes have developed. It's not my business, but I don't mind. It would be interesting, though."
"What about Charles and Pierre?" Lando egged on, waiting for a reaction. 
He watched in satisfaction as Max's eyes turned a shade darker and his jaw clenched. "Nah, I don't see it. But you and Y/n seem to be getting awfully close."
Lando couldn't help the blush that painted his cheeks. He tried to say something but was at a loss for words, mouth gaping like a fish. Max started snickering.
"We're just friends," he finally stuttered out.
"Alright, if you say so."
Lando sighed, turning away in disappointment. That did not go according to plan. 
~~~~~~~~~~
Max won the race, and because the McLaren was good in the high speed corners, Lando finished 2nd and yourself 3rd. 
You and Lando hugged as soon as you got out of your cars.
"Wohoooo! Let's go!" you cheered as you both ran to the fence of McLaren workers. 
You got done with the interview and was the first one in the cooldown room. You had put your helmet down on the platform and was drinking your water. You heard the others entering and turned around, bumping into Lando. 
"Oh, shit!" you exclaimed as you dropped your water bottle. 
You both bent down to grab it, causing your hands to touch and both of you to pause. Lando then grabbed you bottle and you both stood up, staring into each others' eyes for a couple seconds before you snapped out of it and moved to grab your water bottle. 
"Thanks," you said quietly. 
Lando was still looking at you, before quickly saying, "You're welcome."
You noticed Max watching you and the camera on you, so you cleared your throat and moved around Lando to sit on one of the chairs. 
"That was a good overtake, in the beginning," you commented to Max, trying to diffuse the awkwardness. 
Before the conference, Max was quick to get on his phone.
Max: Holy shit, I have so much to tell you about Lando and Y/n
Max: You should come to my hotel room tonight
Max: I think we're in the same hotel
Charles: I have stuff to tell you too. What time?
Max: Does after dinner, 9:00 work? 
Charles: That's perfect
Max: Great, my room is 1633
Charles: See you then ;)
And for some reason Max felt like a giddy schoolgirl at the thought of Charles coming to his hotel room.
You and Lando kept stealing glances at each other whenever the other wasn't looking, and it was so frustrating.
Later, when it was just around 9:00, Max waited (im)patiently for Charles to knock on his door, and he jumped when he finally heard the noise, getting up to let him in. Charles walked in nervously. 
"We can sit on the couch," Max commented, and Charles quickly situated himself on one end, and Max on the other. 
"Ok, you go first," Max urged. 
"Well Y/n came up to me during the driver's parade and she was talking about 'hypothetically' liking something but not doing anything about it because it could ruin their friendship. So of course I told her she should just go for it, and then she looked at Lando."
"Oh my God. Lando came up to me during the driver's parade and asked what I would think if two drivers started dating each other, and I said something about how close him and Y/n were, and he blushed. And then in the cool down room, they bumped into each other which made Y/n drop her water bottle, and when they both reached down to pick it up they touched hands. Then they just stared at each other for like 5 fucking seconds."
"Jesus, what is going on with them."
"I know right, like holy fuck just make out already! I'm sick of their pining."
Max shifted on the couch, causing his foot to touch Charles' leg. 
"Anyway, want to watch a movie?" Max asked, and Charles nodded eagerly. 
And that's how they ended up in the pitch dark, a bowl of microwaved popcorn in between them, some racing movie on the television. 
They both reached for the popcorn at the same time, causing their hands to touch, and both of them snapped their heads to look at each other. 
They stared at each other, eyes flickering down to each other's lips...until the sound of Max's phone ringing caused them both to jump apart. 
"Jesus!" Max exclaimed, quickly silencing his phone, and they reluctantly turned back to the movie, moment ruined. 
~~~~~~~~~~
A couple weeks passed until they were in Qatar. Max and Charles hadn't spoken to each other, and there was minimal communication between you and Lando. 
Max would be starting the race on pole, then Lando, you, and Charles. 
As the race went on, it seemed like that would be the finishing order, until halfway through Max started having braking issues. Lando caught up, overtaking Max for the lead, and you did the same a few laps later. 
The rest of the race, Max had adapted to the issue but still had slow pace because of it, which left him defending against Charles. 
The race ended in that order, Lando taking his first win.
"YEAHHH!!! LET'S FUCKING GO BABY! WOOHOOOOOO!!!" Lando cheered. 
They parked up in front of the podium boards. Lando opened his visor, got out of his car and stood on it, holding up his pointer finger and pumped his fist in celebration, fireworks going off in the background in the dark sky. 
You quickly got out of your car and removed your helmet, going straight to Lando. 
"You did it! You fucking did it! I'm so proud of you!" you told him as you pulled him in for a hug. 
He stared at you for a second when you let go, then immediately removed his helmet, putting a hand on your waist, pulling you closer and connecting your lips together. 
You were stunned for a second, before placing your hand on his cheek and deepening the kiss. Everything around you guys went still, like only the two of you existed. You eventually pulled away and could hear the booming of fireworks, the cheers from the crowd, and the whistles from the McLaren team a few feet away. You both blushed as you came to your senses. 
"I really fucking like you," Lando breathed out, slightly winded from the kiss. 
"I would hope so, after that," you teased, before pulling him in for another kiss. 
Max stood by his team, watching the pair from a far, his jaw dropped. 
"Fucking finally," Max sighed. 
But then he glanced behind him and spotted Charles walking to the FIA garage to get weighed, and an irresistible urge overcame him.
He followed Charles into the garage and grabbed his arm, dragging him behind one of the curtains.
"Did you see that! They finally—"
Charles was cut off as Max crashed their lips together.
"I think I've been wanting to do that for a long time," Max admitted when they pulled away. 
"I've been wanting to do that since I pushed you off the track in karting," Charles smiled, and Max smiled back, kissing him again.
—••—••—••—••—••—••—••—••—••—
a/n: i never intended to publish this anywhere but here i am. i literally never write written romance like this so this is really cringe and i cringed while writing it but enjoy ig. if you have any suggestions though please tell me!!
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theyluvkarolina · 3 days
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𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍’ 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐏𝐈𝐃
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· . ୨୧⭒๋࣭ ⭑ ` ` And then I go and spoil it all, By saying somethin' stupid like, "I love you" ` ` ⊹ ‧₊˚
𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐃?: Yes! (Part of 1K Event!)
𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 ୨୧ Being Max’s strategist is a experience you’d cherish forever. The constant laughter, friendly teasing, shared smiles after wins, is also something Max would never change. But in Max's case, he see’s nothing of this as simply friendly. But sometimes, words are best kept to oneself.
𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 ୨୧ Max Verstappen x Strategist!Fem!Reader
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ୨୧ some photos of kelly get used but i blur out her face, rejection, ANGSTY 🥴🥴, a very slight song fic? (they are listening to it so not really a song fic)
𝐀/𝐍 ୨୧ So so sorry this took longer than expected! My schedule was not my bestie last week 😞 but i have a very special note for my pookie bear ash at the bottom 🫶🫶 (FOLLOW HER ON @maxtermind !! SHE HAS AMAZING WORKS)
1K EVENT MASTERLIST
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2021
y/n_rbstrat ✔︎
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liked by maxverstappen1, redbullracing, danielricciardo, and others
y/n_rbstrat Max. Maxie. Max Emilian Verstappen ladies and gentlemen, your 2021 World Champion. I’m so lucky and proud to have been your strategist and I pray it’s this way for years to come. Seeing you grow along with me is something I’m forever grateful for. I love you so much, my best friend 🩷
tagged ; maxverstappen1, redbullracing
2,409 comments
username1 STOP THE MAX CELEBRATION POST :(
username2 what if i started crying rn
username3 “I love you so much, my best friend” hurt.
→ username4 NO BC WTF DO YOU MEAN FRIENDS??? Y/N HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HE LOOKS AT YOU?? → username5 max is punching air.
maxverstappen1 ✔︎ couldn’t have done it without the best strategist ever ❤️
→ y/n_rbstrat ✔︎ and i couldn’t have done it with the best driver ever 😊 ❤️ → landonorris ✔︎ fucking hell just kiss already → username6 HELP LANDO → username7 bro had enough → landonorris ✔︎ trust me if you see these two all the time in person and refuse to acknowledge their feelings, you want it to be done with. → maxverstappen1 ✔︎ what are you talking about?? → landonorris ✔︎ you know. → username8 if they don’t get together i think i might throw myself off the highway → charles_lelerc ✔︎ “best strategist” huh?
username9 max and y/n hugging is my roman empire.
username10 we are all delusional for y/nstappen.
maxverstappen1 ✔︎
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liked by y/n_rbstrat, redbullracing, charles_leclerc, and others
maxverstappen1 truly unbelievable. i want to thank red bull, my family, friends, y/n, and everyone else for their support. 2021 World Champion 🏆 🎉
tagged ; y/n_rbstrat, redbullracing
5,305 comments
username11 Y/N GETTING HER OWN MENTION HAS MY HEART 😭
username12 if they don’t date i might cry
username13 the hug 😭 ❤️
username14 i feel so single rn
charles_leclerc ✔︎ congratulations! i hope you remember our deal 😉
→ landonorris ✔︎ why wasn’t I informed about this deal??? → georgerussel63 ✔︎ we all know you can’t keep a secret lando → alexalbon ✔︎ says the one that follows gossip accounts and asks us if we know stuff in the gc. → georgerussel63 ✔︎ im not as bad as charles and pierre… those two do it in public WITHOUT SHAME 😒 → pierregasly ✔︎ DONT DRAG ME INTO THIS → username15 HELLO WHAT IS ALL OF THIS?? → username16 NO BECAUSE I NEED TO BE PART OF THIS F1 GROUP CHAT 😭
y/n_rbstrat ✔︎ stop it max i’m going to cry!! im so proud of you! i would never trade my favorite driver for anything in the world ❤️🥹
→ danielricciardo ✔︎ favorite driver??? what the hell am i?? 🙄 → maxverstappen1 ✔︎ the side piece now that you left → danielricciardo ✔︎ uncalled for. → y/n_rbstrat ✔︎ be nice boys pls :( → maxverstappen1 ✔︎ yes ma’am → danielricciardo ✔︎ simp → maxverstappen1 ✔︎ i didn’t know being nice was me being a simp → danielricciardo ✔︎ mate, i saw you literally carrying all her things into the paddock?? you never did that for me → maxverstappen1 ✔︎ last time i checked she’s MY ENGINEER → danielricciardo ✔︎ ugh whatever you say… → username17 guys idk about you but i think max only likes y/n → username18 the way he doe everything for her and she doesn’t see this as love 😭 → username19 i mean she did say in a interview she wasn’t looking for any relationships because of how good her career is doing → username20 idk about anyone else.. but I feel like the day max confesses is the day their relationship comes crashing down. → username21 DON’T START SAYING THIS BS NOW.
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iMessages
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In Person
The heavy, thumping bass reverberates through the walls as you stand in the corner of the club. The club was never your thing. The floors constantly holding spilled drinks and other concoctions, the smell of BO and alcohol overwhelming your senses, the crowded atmosphere filled with sweating people… safe to say if it weren’t for Max dragging you out to be with the team celebrating you would be wrapped in blankets watching some sort of trashy reality TV show.
Max finally made his way over to you, a wide grin plastered on his face, clearly in his element here. He took in the sight of you. Every curve of your body, yevery way your hair falls, the way your eyes twinkle slightly when you notice him, the look of your red lips. He can never get tired of it.
"Hey, glad you made it out," he shouted over the music, the classic rasp in his voice showing as he clapped you on the back trying to hope you haven’t noticed his staring.
You managed a weak smile, feeling out of place amidst the pulsating energy of the club. "Of course," you replied, slightly raising your voice to be heard, “ you think I’d miss celebrating your Championship win?”.
Max gave a smile, “Never. Besides, if you said no, I’d find someway to get you to come over here.”.
You raised a brow at his statement. “Really? How so?”
Max let out a hum as he sloshed his drink in his cup. “Hm… I’m not too sure. Not seeing the cats are a good place to start.”, a smirk tugged at his lips.
Your raised brow turned into a furrow in disbelief, “You wouldn’t dare… not Jimmy and Sassy… they love me!” You exclaimed while Max gave a laugh, running his hand through his blonde stands, well more of him doing a hair-tuck to his nonexistent length. The conversation soon comes to a halt, although the music is booming, it felt as if it is just you and him in the entire world at the moment. It was your own form of silence. A comfortable one.
"How about we get out of here.” He suggested, breaking the silence.
“Leave? Max, we just got here! You said-“
“I asked you to celebrate with me, I never said where. It’s my Championship win after all.” He smiled, his eyes wrinkling from his proposition. “We only met here because this is where the team would be. It’s not as if they would notice we’re gone anyways… they are too wasted to even think.”
You tried to hide your smile but failed as Max extended his hand pressing it against your back, his eyes shining with mischief.
"Come on, let's get out of here," he urged. And suddenly, the pulsating energy of the club faded into the background as if the world outside those doors was beckoning to you.
You both stepped out into the cool night air, and beyond the hustle and bustle of the city, there was a strange serenity. It was as if time slowed down, and you found myself feeling more alive than you had in a long while. Max’s hand felt warm… reassuring… friendly. A steady presence in the midst of the urban chaos.
Being a woman in the industry of Formula One caused many controversies, let alone being a engineer to one of the possible best upcoming drivers in the history of the sport. From the sexist comments from other Formula One fans, to even your own people, co-workers in the workplace. Their degrading looks given to you if you even tried to hold a conversation with them was enough to be said. It wasn’t until a response to a interview did others begin to take you seriously. One that Max himself gave.
"Max, how do you feel about having a new, female engineer like Y/N on your team, especially during such a critical incident like the one with Bottas in Hungary? Do you think her gender affected her performance under pressure and can contribute to this race in Belgium? I mean, women are known to crack more under pressure then men.“ The interviewer asked as the room went quiet, a singular cough reverberating in the room from the tension of the atmosphere becoming so thick you can cut it with a knife.
“Excuse me?” Max questioned, his voice holding a tone filled of disbelief and slight disgust.
“I said, Max, how do you feel about-“
“No, no, I understood what you said I’m not deaf.” Her cut the journalist off making the journalist pause his speech and hold his tongue. “Look, I couldn’t care less about her gender. What matters to me is if she can do the job, which she’s been doing remarkably well. And as for the incident with Bottas in Hungary, she handled the pressure just like any other competent engineer would. It wasn’t her fault. I’ll take the blame for it. Her gender has nothing to do with it. If anything, it adds a fresh perspective to our team, and that’s a good thing. Now if anyone has any other questions like this asshole over here, I would pick another question to do.”
No one dared to speak of you the way the interviewer did.
After the interview, you approached Max who happened to be watching over some data from the sim. Blue eyes focused with such intensity that he didn’t even notice you.
”Max, I wanted to thank you for standing up for me in there. It means a lot to have your support." You commented softly, not wanting to disrupt him due to Max being known for his rather… straightforward and blunt responses.
"No problem. We're a team, and a team supports each other. Your gender shouldn’t matter in the first place. It’s all about weather you can do your job and your doing just fine.” He said matter of fact.
You nodded, feeling a sense of camaraderie and mutual respect. You weren’t used to it one bit. But it felt amazing. As if you can actually walk somewhere and not be treated as if you were a piece of dirt.
”Thanks you... I'm glad to be part of this team, and I'll keep giving my best."
A tender look graced your face as you remember the memory, finally gaining a friend in the hell of a industry, but you wouldn’t change it in the world if it meant that you got to meet Max and work with him. While you both walked along the quiet streets, the sounds of the city and the soft glow of the street lights enveloping us in a kind of magical cocoon.
“So… where are we going?”
“You’ll see.” was his only response, making you roll your eyes.
You two continued walking until you reach a secluded area on the white, sandy beach of the UAE. You look up to the dark, noir sky. The sun was long gone and the only shine that hits your skin was the moonlight, complemented by the clusters of stars crafting their own soft glow. Max stared at you as if you were some sort of marble statue, hand crafted by the Greeks.
How can someone be so beautiful?
The humming song from a nearby restaurant or bar was the only sound heard. It was a gentle melody, one that fits the mood so far into the night.
"Care to dance?” Max finally asked, snapping you out of your trance.
“Dance? What are we? In our early 20’s?” You teased, eyes meeting his blue eyes that glisten like the moon’s reflection in the oceans waves.
"Age doesn't define how we have fun," he retorted. You couldn't help but snort a bit, feeling the lightheartedness of the moment.
"Alright, why not?" you agreed, letting him lead you to a spot under the faint light of a nearby lamppost. He placed his calloused hand onto the small of your back, close to your hip just as he did to lead you out of the club, then leading your hand to be placed onto his shoulder
As the music enveloped you, you swayed to the gentle rhythm, feeling the warmth of the sand under your feet and the cool breeze from the ocean as his eyes meet yours.
`` I practice every day, To find some clever lines to say, To make the meaning come true ``
“I’m proud of you you, y’know that?”
“You’ve told me once or twice.”
“It’s true though.” You reassure.
“It’s just as true as me saying how beautiful you are.”
`` But then I think I'll wait Until the evening gets late And I'm alone with you ``
You let out a chuckle. “Smooth Max Emilian Verstappen. Very smooth. Practicing for some girl that caught your eye or something?”
His eyes slightly widen before losing contact with yours, “Maybe I am…”, his cheeks being brushed with a slight red.
“Well she must be a lucky girl. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”
It goes faint.
`` The time is right, your perfume fills my head The stars get red, and, oh, the night's so blue ``
“Can-…” Max starts glancing back at you before cutting himself off choking on his own words.
“What is it, Max?”
“Godverdomme… can I tell you something?”
“Anything. I’m you friend after all.”
Friend.
`` And then I go and spoil it all By saying somethin' stupid like, "I love you" ``
"I love you.”
“You… you what?”
Your movement stops.
“I love you Y/N. So much. Ever since you walked in the office I-“
“No… no no no… “
“…What?”
“Max… please tell me your messing with me…”
He is just your friend. But you’re his everything.
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𝐀/𝐍 ୨୧ Ash, my love, my pookie, the love of my life, you my love re the reason I’m here today. If it weren’t for you reaching out and becoming friends with me in March, I don’t know where I’d be right now. Whether it be reviewing our work together, watching GP’s together, sending THOSE edits to one another, and even just random rants and talks, I’m glad it was you who I was with when I started my writing journey and I wouldn’t change a thing. I really hope you like this fic, I def tried my best with it 🥹🫶 LOVE YOU LOTS LOVELY 🩷
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“I’m just saying it’s manipulative.”
“Manipulative? Eddie you can’t be serious.”
“I am, now, where’s the dish? It’s got to be around here somewhere.”
“Maybe in this box, clearly labelled ‘kitchen’?” Dustin snarks, “and I don’t see how you can say behaving in a way that’s been dictated by your very biology is...manipulative. That’s not fair, man.”
Eddie digs in the box, bringing out the baking dish he wants, and then heads back into the kitchen, swerving around clutter and open boxes as he goes, “yeah, I get that a lot of Omega act the way they do because of what they are, alright. I get that, I do. But all this...kind of, 'oh my oh my, can’t the big Alpha come and save me...I just need looking after and...and protecting'. And I get that it works, a lot of Alphas eat that shit right up, I’m just not one of them.” Eddie bangs around in the kitchen fixing Wayne’s famous corned beef hash casserole, “it’s just not for me, you know? I don’t want someone who’s just going to do as they’re told and roll over on everything, I want someone who is equal, not someone who wants looking after all the time. I will not be loosing my head over any Omega, no matter how pretty they are.”
“So you...wouldn’t look after your Omega?” Dustin squints at him.
“Firstly, not happening, not ever, I’m sticking to Beta’s and that is final...but, I mean, yeah, of course I’d look after my partner, but I’d do that for anyone. I don’t want this hormone driven need to...to I don’t know. It’s just not for me Henderson, okay? Now help me with the books.”
Dustin whines, “but there’s like, fifty million of them...and I still don’t agree that it’s manipulative. They’re just...playing to their strengths, or whatever.”
“Right, so an Omega bats their eyelashes and every Alpha in sniffing distance is falling over themselves to do whatever the Omega wants, and that’s not manipulative?”
“Welllll…no, especially since it only works because of the Alphas in the first place, if it’s anyone fault, it’s the Alphas, right?”
“Fucking...just shut up Henderson.”
Eddie’s just put their plates on the table when there’s a knock at the door, “I’m not waiting,” Dustin sits down and starts shoveling, and Eddie mutters curses all the way to the door, he’s absolutely starving-
“Hi, I am so sorry,” it’s an Omega. A ridiculously pretty one. A very, very pregnant one. “I’m from next door,” the very very pretty Omega is on tip toes, trying to look over Eddie’s shoulder. He’s clutching a plate to his chest, “I know you’ve just moved in and, again, I am so so sorry about this, but is there any chance I could try what you’re cooking? Please?”
He smells so good. Even better than a regular Omega; Eddie’s sure it’s because he’s pupped, probably some biological bullshit about protecting pups and whatever. But still, he’s...he’s cute, standing there with his plate, sniffing after Eddie’s cooking.
“I could smell it in the hall. It could just be the tiniest bit, but I just would really like to try it, I’m so sorry for interrupting your dinner but-”
“Hey, it’s okay,” Eddie says, taking the guys plate, “just hang there a second.” Eddie goes and...well, if he fills the plate of what was going to be tomorrows dinner, no one needs to know. Eddie might have opinions on gender, but he’s not a dick. The guy is very pregnant, plus he was being super polite about it. He even brought his own plate.
It’s another human being, pregnant and hungry; Eddie would do the same to help anyone out. This is absolutely nothing to do with the guy being the prettiest Omega Eddie’s ever seen in real life.
Eddie delivers the plate back, “oh my goodness,” oh okay, that’s adorable. Eddie’s pretty sure he’s never heard anyone say ‘oh my goodness’ in real life, like, ever. “Thank you so so much, is there anything I can do? I can contribute to the ingredients or-” and that’s when Eddie figures that not only is the guy very pretty, he’s actually a reasonable human being too, lots of people wouldn’t have even thought about that sort of thing.
“No, we’re good just, ah, let me know what you think.”
“I will, I will,” the guy is saying as he turns to leave, carefully carrying his laden plate. He’s big enough that he’s kind of waddling, and Eddie watches him long enough to see him go into the next apartment along the hall.
Eddie shuts the door, turning back to find Dustin watching him, both eyebrows raised, a very accusatory look on his face, “oh shut the fuck up.”
“Just let me know what you think,” Dustin mimics back, like a little bitch.
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barcaatthemoon · 3 days
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Can you do Alexia for “It’s… different. With them, I spent most of my time longing for something that wasn’t even accessible. With you, I simply feel alive.”
I love your little blurbs❤️ They’re how I reward myself for completing tasks at work!
thank you, i've honestly had a lot of fun writing them. it's nice to have something small to get the fic momentum going.
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different || alexia putellas x reader ||
it was the simplest things that always caused your feelings to hit you like a truck. alexia hadn't so much as looked your way once she had started to kick the ball around with the children. you knew how important it was for her to bring something worthy back to her hometown. she wanted to make things better and help in every way she could think to.
"i don't think i have ever been so proud of her," eli said, breaking your focus on alexia. you nodded in agreement. this meant the world to alexia. "i know that you do not feel like it, but i am proud of you too. you helped her more than you know, mija."
you had never been good at taking praise, and now was no different. your cheeks heated up with a mix of embarrassment and shame. truthfully, you didn't feel like you had done anything for alexia. this was all her, you had just been her girlfriend for the most part.
"gracias eli." you bowed your head towards alexia's mother.
"i mean it, talk to her. have the big conversations that you are afraid of, nothing bad can come of it. your love is special." it was hard, but you did take eli's advice that night. alexia had brought you back to her childhood home for the night, even if her bed was far too cramped for the two of you to get comfortable.
"you did good today, ale. everybody is so proud of you for this, it's going to be amazing," you told her. alexia smiled as she turned just enough to stare at you in the light coming from her tv. "i wish that i could do something special to help people. sometimes i feel like nothing. i mean, you've had a pretty impressive string of girlfriends."
"you are nothing like any of them, you're different."
"ale, that's not exactly comforting," you chuckled. you knew that alexia didn't mean it like that, so you couldn't help tease her.
"it's... different. with them, i spent most of my time longing for something that wasn't accessible. i didn't know what it was until you came alone. with you, i simply feel alive. all of this, i did it because i felt like i could with you supporting me. don't ever feel like nothing because to me, you are everything mi amor." alexia cupped your cheeks and leaned in to kiss your forehead. you scrunched your face up a bit, only to relax it again after alexia gave you a proper kiss. "now, let's get some rest. i promised the girls i would come to the park bright and early for a pick up game."
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aakeysmash · 22 hours
Note
prompt:
sukuna skipping gym to sleep in and later on does his workout in their living room, using her as a weight when doing push ups, may turn heated hehe
college Sukuna's masterlist
turned this into a college!sukuna drabble lmao sorry!! no smut this time, i wanted to elaborate a bit on sukuna's protectivness toward yuuji :)
You're humming a song from your studying playlist when you hear someone knocking at your door. You look at the clock you keep on your desk near a plant Yuuji gifted you last week. On the terracotta vase there's a scribbled note in the obvious handwriting of a child.
To: baby peach, but no more annoying screams when we play, please!
You smile. He always chooses to be baby mario when you play Mario Kart together because he doesn't want you to feel alone in case you're the only baby character. He's such a cute kid, you're lucky to have him as one of your almost-roommates.
You get up (it's still pretty early anyway) and stretch your back, hearing it pop. You open the door, and standing in front of it is the same kid you were thinking about.
"Hey," you wave at him, a happy tilt to your voice. You look at him shuffling and avoiding your gaze.
"Is everything okay, Yuuji?" you start getting worried. He mumbles something you don't hear clearly, so you make him repeat himself. He juts his lip out, then looks straight at your face.
"Can you take me to school please?"
You raise your eyebrows. Usually, this is a big brother kind of duty: where is Sukuna? Yuuji takes your silence as rejection and starts backtracking.
"Sorry, I didn't want to disturb you, I can just go alone-"
"Sure, let me grab my purse and we can go," you stop him, changing your expression to one of calmness, ruffling his pink, unruly hair.
"Are you sure it's not a bother?" he asks you hesitantly. "Big bro closed his door and I can't seem to be able to wake him up... and I'm supposed to be accompanied by an adult..."
"It's not a big deal, Yuuji. I'll take you in my passenger seat, okay? We'll be there shortly," you reassure him, nodding.
"Thanks," he says, blushing, giving you one of the biggest smiles you've ever seen him do. Your heart melts a little, and he looks at you like you've physically hung up the sun shining outside.
When you get back home, you're not even able to get to your room when you find yourself being squished between the nearest wall and a hot, rapidly rising and falling chest.
"Where the fuck is my brother?" Sukuna grits out his teeth, breathing down your neck. You wince. He's controlling his strength, but he's still a mountain compared to you, and your ribcage is starting to hurt.
"Get off of me right now or I'm calling the police, Itadori."
He notices he must have been too rough and takes a step back, mumbling an apology while still looking at you menacingly. You pat your clothes, making sure there are no wrinkles before answering him.
"I took him to school. He told me he was being neglected by his own caretaker, so I had to intervene," you shrug.
"He did not say that. He doesn't even know the word neglect," he says, sighing. His shoulders drop and he takes on a more relaxed appearance.
"What's wrong with you? You've never gotten up later than 6 am," you ask him, trying to sound nonchalant, walking toward your fridge to make yourself a toast. The truth is, you're starting to get attached to him. In the last couple of months, you've created some sort of bond, and it's probably also thanks to Yuuji and his stubbornness in making you do things like you're a family. Just last night, he forced you both to make cookies with him because apparently his friend Megumi was coming to play this afternoon and "he wanted to make a good impression".
Sukuna, on the other hand, can be a lot. The majority of the time he nudges you to get you to move out of his way (he just does it to see your annoyed face, but he's not going to tell you that), huffs in your face when you say he hasn't cleaned his dishes from the night before, and flips you off whenever you try to have a civil conversation about who's turn it is to choose the film on Friday night. But he's also pretty attentive. It's not like he makes you notice it, but he does feel bad for you when you get out of your room after an all nighter because of your studies. He thinks you're annoying because you're always trying to pry into his private life, but when you're not home Yuuji always asks of your whereabouts. Yeah, that's definitely why he can't stop thinking about you laughing with the boy he literally raised. The boy whose disappearance was driving him insane this morning.
Because sure, Sukuna tells Yuuji he's a brat 95% of the time, and the kid yaps way too much for his taste. He also manhandles the kid badly, telling him he's way too weak to be called his brother, and more often than not Sukuna tells him he's adopted and that he'll kick him out as soon as he can. But you've seen the way he prepared soup every night when his little brother caught the flu in December—he's just full of shit. He'll never admit how hard it was to raise a brother he didn't want at 13, alone and broke. But he'll make sure the child never doubts of having someone to fall back into like Sukuna did since he was much younger than Yuuji is now.
"Didn't sleep well and I missed the gym," he responds, munching on an apple. You hum in acknowledgment, not turning around from the stove.
"You know that pilates class you suggested to me last week? I found their videos on YouTube. I was thinking of starting them today," you quickly change the topic. You know you won't get more than that; him admitting he didn't sleep well was already a win.
"Wanna start them with me, chipmunk?" he asks you. You turn around to slap his arm slightly.
"I told you to stop calling me that," you say rolling your eyes.
"No."
You whine. "Yes, by the way. I want to see you suffer like the men I see on TikTok."
"Come be my weight and I'll do pilates with you today," he suddenly says. You're biting your toast and you're so caught off guard that you start coughing up crumbles. He hands you a glass of water while telling you you're too fucking dramatic.
"What does it mean to be your weight?" you tentatively ask him when you can breathe properly again.
That's how you find yourself sitting crisscrossed on his back, gripping his shirt as hard as you can, while he does pushups and tries not to laugh every time you scream about him moving too much and almost making you fall.
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adrienneleclerc · 2 days
Text
Rumors
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Hispanic/Latina! Reader
Summary: There have been rumors going around that Y/N is cheating on Charles 🫢
Warning: Spelling and grammatical errors, ANGST ending with fluff, very bad photoshop (I was working with what I had)
A/N: this is my first time writing angst so let’s see how I do.
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Charles Leclerc DNF’d in the Canadian Grand Prix, he was so mad, he thought he could at least get some points, his engine was shit, the only thing he wanted to do was go home to his girlfriend. He decided to call her up on FaceTime. She answered after the second ring.
“Hey muñeco, what happened? I thought today was the GP, should you be racing?” Y/N asked, she was in line at the airport, getting ready to fly to Monaco.
“I’m out of the race, Mon ange.” Charles explained.
“Ay mi amor, i am so sorry to hear that. Listen, I’m at the airport right now, I’m going to Monaco, I’ll be in your apartment before you come back, okay? Then we can spend as much time together as you want.” Y/N said, knowing Charles will probably be very clingy after a terrible race.
“I’d like that. Have a safe flight, Mon coeur.” Charles said.
“Bye, mi vida.” Y/N said, sending him a kiss and Charles does the same before hanging up.
He was standing with the Ferrari team, looking at the monitors and viewing the rest of the race until Carlos also DNF’d. That just left him and Carlos talking until they were called for an interview when the race finished.
“Ugh, I can’t wait to go home.” Charles said, entering the driver’s room with Carlos. “When is our flight?”
“I don’t know, cabrón. Probably later tonight, I just want to get the fuck out of Montreal.” Carlos said.
“Same.” Charles groaned.
“Have you talked to Y/N?” Carlos asked, looking at his phone.
“Yeah, she’s getting on a flight to Monaco.” Charles said. “Why do you ask?”
“Because this is trending on Instagram.” Carlos said, showing Charles the Instagram post he found.
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132,926 likes
f1WAGupdates the singer and girlfriend of Charles Leclerc, Y/N L/N, has been seen with the Maxton Hall actor, Damian Hardung, at a restaurant in Manhattan. Is this why Y/N wasn’t seen at the Canadian GP? She’s too busy hooking up with Damian behind Charles’s back? Looks like she’s not as supportive as she says she is.
Carlos pulled the phone away from Charles’s face
“Let me see the comments, Carlos.” Charles demanded.
“No way, it will just drive you crazy.” Carlos said, hiding his phone.
“Fine, I’ll go to Instagram myself. Who the fuck is Damian Hardung?” Charles asked, he was pulling his phone out but Carlos took it from him and shoved it in his pants. Charles looked at him and then at Carlos’s pants. “Don’t make me search for it, Carlos.”
“I am helping you! If you read those comments, you are going to be antsy when we’re on the plane.” Carlos said and Charles rolled his eyes and left the driver’s room, making his way to Max and Lando who were talking, with Carlos following quickly behind him. “Don’t give him your phone!” Carlos yelled.
“Max, Lando, Can you check Instagram for me?” Charles asked.
“Don’t you have your own phone?” Lando asked.
“Carlos has it.” Charles said and that’s when Carlos appeared behind him. Charles had his arms spread out as if he was block Carlos from the other two drivers. “Just go to Instagram.” Charles said sharply.
“Don’t go to Instagram!” Carlos exclaimed.
“Okay, I’m on Instagram, what else?” Max asked,
“Is there a gossip post about Y/N L/N and Damian Hardung?” Charles asked.
“Are you stalking your girlfriend?” Lando asked.
“Don’t show him anything!” Carlos exclaimed, getting away from Charles and heading over to Lando.
“I found it! Charles, are you sure you want to see this?” Max asked.
“Just read me the comments.” Charles demanded.
“Don’t!” Carlos exclaimed.
“Okay… ‘i never trusted Y/N, she seemed very fake.’ Dude, I don’t know…” Max started but Charles cut him off.
“Give me that.” Charles said and he took Max’s phone to read the other comments. ‘I bet she has been cheating on him for months’ one said, ‘all those times when she wasn’t at a GP, I bet she was with him’ said another, but there was one comment that hurt him the most ‘Charles is so blind, it was clear that she never really loved him, she doesn’t even post about him’ “FUCK!” Charles screamed. He gave Max his phone back, shoving him a little in the process. “I need to go to Monaco now.”
“What am I supposed to do?” Carlos asked.
“Catch a rode with Max and Lando!” Charles yelled as we walked away, trying to find Fred.
“Why did you tell him?” Carlos asked the Dutch driver, hitting his arm in the process.
“How was I supposed to know I wasn’t supposed to?” Max asked, playing dumb.
“I was literally shouting ‘Don’t tell him anything’ cabrón!” Carlos exclaimed.
“You know how max is, Carlos, he’ll do anything for Charles.” Lando teased Max, earning himself a slap on the arm.
Charles found Fred after asking a few Ferrari workers. “Fred, I need to go to Monaco now,”
“Is there an emergency, Charles?” Fred asked, very concerned with Charles’s state.
“Yes.” Charles said.
“Okay, I can have the plane ready in an hour, get Carlos, go to your hotel rooms and pack your things.” Fred said, already making plans with the pilot.
“Perfect, thank you!” Charles thanked him and walked back to Carlos, Max, and Lando, finding them arguing. “Carlos, let’s go, we need to pack.”
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Y/N’s flight was 11 hours long and Charles’s flight is 8 hours so Charles made it to the apartment first. He unpacked his luggage and put away his clothes. He then made himself something to eat while he viewed that stupid Instagram post, reading the comments. It wasn’t until he heard Y/N’s keys that he realized he spent over an hour reading the comments. Y/N came in with her luggage and walked to the couch where Charles sat.
“Muñeco, what are you doing here, I thought your flight was tomorrow?” Y/N asked, getting closer to him to kiss his lips but he turned his head. Y/N leaned back a little. “What’s wrong, muñeco?”
“Nothing at all. I just have a question is all.” Charles stated. Y/N put her suitcases in Charles’s bedroom before she sat down on the matching loveseat.
“Sure Amor, ask away.” Y/N said.
“What were you doing in New York?” Charles asked.
“Oh well I visited my parents, they’re doing well, they asked when you were going to visit so maybe we could visit before going to Spain. I was recording my new album with Sony Records, I think it’s going to go do really well, but who knows.” Y/N said.
“And what else happened when you were in New York?” Charles asked, wanting her to tell him herself.
“Mmm, nothing really important, I met with some people from Amazon.” Y/N said. Charles had a straight face and pursed his lips in annoyance. “I’m sensing that’s not what you wanted to hear.”
“Of course that’s not what I wanted to hear!” Charles raised his voices getting off the couch and walked into the kitchen with Y/N walking behind him. “I want to know why the fuck You were out with this guy.” Charles said, turning around and showing Y/N the Instagram post. “Who the fuck is Damian Hardung?”
“Damian is an actor from Maxton Hall, you know that Amazon show that I’ve been obsessed with?” Y/N asked him while she got a soda from the fridge, charles nodded his head for her to continue. “Anyway, I met up with him and some people from Amazon because they were considering him and I as leads for their new movie.” Opening the soda bottle to take a sip.
“But you don’t act.” Charles said. Y/N rolled her eyes, closed the bottle, and put it on the counter,
“But I sent in an audition tape for Culpa Tuya and i guess they liked it and wanted me as a lead.” Y/N said.
“Really, that’s all that was?” Charles asked.
“Yeah, it’s just a business dinner.” Y/N said.
“Then why is he looking at you like that? Why are you leaning against him like that?” Charles asked exasperated.
“Chemistry test, is that what you wanna hear? Why are you acting like this?” Y/N asked.
“Why am I acting like this? Let’s see, my car power unit was shit, it was my worst race of the season because I DNF’d, my top 4 streak is over, and to top it all off, my girlfriend was seen with another guy and everyone is talking about me!” Charles yelled and Y/N widened her eyes, she has never been yelled at before, her parents made sure to never fight in front of her or her siblings when she was growing up so the fact that he’s not yelling in front of her but actually yelling AT her.
“Why are you taking your anger out on me?” Y/N asked with tears in her me.
“Where are you when you’re not with me for the Grand Prix?” Charles asked. Y/N wiped her eyes.
“Charles, You’re being ridiculous.” Y/N said, trying to go to the living room but Charles blocked her. “Charles, no estoy jugando.”
“I’m not playing either, where are you?” Charles asked.
“I have a career outside of being your girlfriend you know! I’m not going to follow you around like a fucking puppy.” Y/N stated. “You understand that, right? I have interviews, photo shoots, live performances, I can’t go to every race. It never bothered you before, why is it bothering you now?”
“Why do you never post me on Instagram?” Charles asked.
“You’re insane.” Y/N stated.
“And you’re avoiding the question.” Charles said,
“What do you wanna do, Charles? You wanna track me? You wanna know my every move? You want me to post us on my Instagram and TikTok even when you said you didn’t want to risk me getting sent hate so we decided that I wouldn’t post anything?” Y/N asked rhetorically. “You’re acting as if I’d cheat on you.” Y/N jokingly said but when she saw Charles face. “No fucking way, you actually think I would cheat on you? Are you that insecure? Why the hell would you think that?”
“I’ve been reading the comments on the instagram post.” Charles said and Y/N rolled her eyes.
“Why would you believe the comments? Let me tell you this one time and one time only, I am your girlfriend, okay? If you come across a freaking piece of chisme like that, TALK TO ME, don’t come accusing me of cheating on you when I literally have your logo as a tramp stamp…” Y/N said and Charles smirked at the mention of the tramp stamp, his favorite tattoo of hers. “Focus, you horndog. I love you, and only you. If I have to move in with you to prove that, I will. Wait, I got a better idea, come here.” Y/N said, pulling Charles in front of a mirror so she could take selfie of them.
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Liked by charlesleclerc and 1,240,295 others
yourusername Charles and I have been dating for a year, he is the one I love. Though I love Damian Hardung in Maxton Hall, which is like my favorite show ever, I am in a very loving relationship. Damian is just a friend, he might be my future costar if I’m lucky. Why I’m not at races is no one’s business, I was present during Imola and Monaco, I am always home to celebrate with Charles and I love him dearly.
“There, it’s posted. Now you can stop worrying about us.” Y/N said.
“I’m sorry about everything, Mon ange.” Charles said.
“It’s fine muñeco. But yell at me again and I will shave your head in your sleep.” Y/N said with a serious look on her face.
“You wouldn’t shave my head, you love my hair, what are you going to tug on when I’m going down on you?” Charles asked with a smirk on his face and leaning into kiss her and Y/N just laughs.
“You really are a horndog aren’t you.” Y/N said but kissed him anyway. “But seriously, don’t yell at me again, I will stab you in your sleep.”
“Can you please stop threatening me, Mon ange?” Charles asked and Y/N just giggled and nodded. “Are you coming to Barcelona with me?” Charles asked.
“Of course I am! Are we going to New York next weekend?” Y/N asked.
“I’m sure I can arrange that, if not we can go after Spain.” Charles said.
“That sounds perfect. I will be posting more photos of us from now on, okay? So what did we learn today, mi muñequito celoso?”
“That I should talk to you before believing a gossip post about you.” Charles said.
“Good boy. Now…how do you want to take out your frustrations on yesterday’s Grand Prix?” Y/N asked, looking at him with siren eyes.
“Bedroom.” Charles said before he kisses Y/N, lifting her, making Y/N wrap her legs around his waist, and he carried her to his bedroom, shutting the door with his foot.
The End
Hope y’all liked it, I don’t really write angst, but I hope this turned out well 🤗
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hellodropbear · 1 day
Text
like she used to (V)
alexia putellas x sister chapter I, II, III, IV from alexia's perspective tonight :)
~~~~~~
My younger sister hates me. 
I don't know why, I don't even know when it happened. 
But I know that my younger sister hates me, and I have absolutely no idea what to do about it. 
I have known there was something wrong since she started skipping our dinners on Thursdays, claiming to have Barcelona B training until late. 
I knew they finished up an hour before dinner started. 
Alba says that I spent to much time away from her, that I didn't focus on her enough. 
Mami says that she is growing up and simply becoming less reliant on her older sisters. 
But neither of those explanations seem to make sense, because my younger sister is not the girl that I once knew any more. 
The girl who would sleep in my bed every night, who wiped my tears when I cried and put a smile on my face when all I wanted to do was bury my face into my pillow and scream about how unfair the world was. 
Because she's Elena and she's happy, she always has been.
But Elena does not seem happy anymore. And I don't know when it changed, but I hate myself for not being there to make her smile like she did for me so many times when we were younger. I hate myself for not being there to put a smile back on her face as soon as it fell off. 
She lives with bags under her eyes, her usually olive skin turned pale, her eyes constantly downcast and her eyebrows set in a solemn line. 
She used to tell me everything, but then I blinked and my baby sister's name was on my team sheet and I didn't even know she had been training with the first team. 
Mami said that she was sleeping, that she didn't want to talk about it now. Mapi told me the next day that she found her 45 minutes away from home, sitting in the park by her house. 
I should have been there more, I should have gone to her games. I know that, everyone knows that. But I broke up with Jenni, who had been my rock for as long as I could remember. I broke up with Jenni and she moved to Mexico, leaving me alone for the first time, in an apartment full of memories that would swallow me every time I entered.
I felt alone, every fibre of my being felt alone. I was isolated and my world was crumbling around me. And I didn't know who to turn to, I didn't know where I could find support. 
I didn't know that Elena was sat at home in bed, staring at her phone and waiting for me to call her, to text her. 
I used to call her every night, but slowly, those phone calls died out. Elena would all asleep with her phone in her lap. Until she gave up. Until she switched her phone off as soon as she reached her bedroom in the evenings. 
Back when Papi died, I relied probably a bit too much on my little sister to get me through it. Mami always said it was the wrong thing so I didn't want to make that mistake again. I avoided Elena, not wanting her to realise how weak I really am. She always said she admired me for being strong, powerful. I was her inspiration, her hero. 
I didn't want to ruin that image she had of me by crying on Mami's couch, unable to be alone after something as superficial as a breakup. 
But I think I ruined that image in other ways. 
I stopped going to her games. 
I stopped holding her as she fell asleep in my lap on a Thursday evening, instead watching her move further and further away from me on the sofa, until she wasn't there at all. 
I stopped being there for her, helping her with her homework, picking her up from training, taking her out for ice cream. 
I stopped being her sister, and I don't think I will ever forgive myself. 
I don't think she will ever forgive me either. 
And to make everything worse, I only thought about it properly when Olga brought it up a few weeks ago. 
"Why haven't I met your younger sister yet? There are so many photos of her here, but I have never even spoken to her."
It was then that everything came crashing down, reality hitting me like a truck, driving 100 kilometres an hour along the highway. 
Olga couldn't understand why I was suddenly sobbing into her arms, my words more incoherent than my thoughts. But she held me close and told me one thing. 
"If there is something wrong with your little sister, you need to fix it."
Obviously she was right, she didn't need to tell me that. 
I felt an enormous surge of guilt explode inside of me, and for once Olga's arms didn't do anything to help me. I don't deserve her comfort, I don't deserve to feel good when I have left my baby sister behind. 
Because she is everything to me but I haven't spoken to her in two years. 
I don't know how I let it go this far.
~~~~~~
Mapi's voice is scratchy and quiet over the phone, and I could tell something is wrong. She wouldn't tell me what. 
"Elena is here with me. I texted Eli but she didn't reply but I needed to tell someone that she is safe and asleep in my spare room. We will take her to the game in the morning."
She didn't say much else, other than that she found my sister at the park after she had taken the bus from home. 
But, the look that she gave me at the game the next day told me everything I need to know. 
It wasn't angry, really, she just looked confused and hurt. She looked upset as well and I knew exactly what it was about. Because Elena has always loved Mapi, and Mapi has always treated Elena like a little sister. 
Elena would have told Mapi something, and even though I don't know what it was, I know it would have been bad enough to make Mapi overthink everything, to realise how awful I have been over the past few years. 
I was anxious through the whole game, separated from my best friend by Frido and Jana, trying my best to ignore the looks that Mapi kept sending me. 
The looks that were filled with such emotion that I couldn't handle. Emotions that were hard to read because they were filled with so much meaning. 
I am too much of a coward to face her and my consequences, I realise, so I ignore it for as long as I can. 
But I knew I could not avoid everything when Mami pulled me to the side after the rest of the girls had gone back into the changing rooms, after Alba had gone to the bathroom. 
"What are you doing?" 
She was furious, and for good reason. But I stay silent, still too scared, too guilty about everything I had done. The only thing on my mind was  trying to figure out how I could ever fix this. 
"Alexia Putellas! Answer me! What are you doing?" 
Her face was almost red, but if I looked hard enough I would have been able to see the tears that dried up in her eyes, never given the chance to slip down her face. 
"What do you mean, Mami?" 
She rolled her eyes dramatically and scoffed loudly. 
"Your baby sister is 15 years old and without any help from you, her older sister, was sitting on the bench for your team. The best team in Europe. She is 15, Alexia! This is such a huge achievement and all she wants is a hug from you, for you to tell her you are proud of her, that you love her. But no. Nothing. Nothing at all from the great Alexia Putellas who cares about nothing but her career!" 
Mami's words are a slap in the face, really. Thinking back to them, however, they are the truth. The terrible, painful, horrendous truth. 
Not that I don't care about anything but my career, of course, but about how I haven't done anything to help Elena get to where she is. 
I pause before responding, debating internally how I should respond. 
I could respond with fire, but that would just make Mami even more furious.
So I don't. 
"I know she is, Mami! That is why I am about to go do exactly that. I am so, so proud of her but I can't find the words to tell her just how proud I am."
She looks at me for a moment, as if assessing the validity of my statement. 
"We are going out to dinner tonight, Alexia. You are coming with us and we are celebrating Elena. Not you, Elena."
I nod, telling her that I will go get Elena and meet her and Alba outside. 
Except that doesn't happen, because I see Elena in the changing rooms, but she doesn't seem to want to have anything to do with me. 
I see the 15 year old girl laughing and interacting with my team, holding Aitana close and whispering in her ear. 
But honestly, the whole scene flipped my insides out. I am not focused on Olga as she chats to me, as she notices how distant I am from reality, moving towards Mapi. 
When I do finally speak to my sister, it does not go well. She is cold and I don't know how to get through to her because she is right to not want to talk to me, she is right to stick up for herself. I have messed up and I still have no idea how to fix things. And until I do, she is right to act like this. 
So I didn't end up going to their dinner, instead sitting alone in my apartment and staring blankly at my switched off tv, wondering what on earth I can do to fix this mess. To fix this mess that I single handedly created. 
It meant that Mami came round late, storming into my apartment, smoke practically billowing from her ears.
"You have messed up, Alexia. She is so upset and it is entirely your fault! You are stupid, you are irresponsible and you have been a terrible sister." 
I cowered under her strong gaze but she did not soften. She sat down, placing her head in her hands.
"You are almost 30! You should know better. I have not raised you to be like this, I have not raised you to throw people away without any thought, not caring how it might affect them. She is so confused and so, so upset and it is all because of you. All because you decided a few years ago that you did not have time for her anymore."
"Mami-"
There are tears in my eyes, but Mami can not see them. Mami does not care, she should not care because I did all of this, all by myself. 
"No, Alexia. You will tell me what has happened, why you have done this. You have ripped apart our family, Alexia. Alba is practically mourning the destruction of it and I just can not begin to understand why you have decided Elena doesn't mean anything to you any more."
"I haven't decided that!" My yell took my mother off guard and she recoiled. I continued before she could speak again. 
"I love her! So much and I am proud of her! I don't know what I have done, Mami and I don't know how to fix this." The tears that filled my eyes began to slip down my face. "I have ruined everything."
My voice broke and Mami softened, looking at me in confusion, some sort of inner turmoil and for the first time in my life, I recognised that she had no idea what to do. 
She didn't know what to do as I broke down into sobs, my body practically folding into itself, loud cries wracking through my body. 
"I don't know what is wrong with me." 
~~~~~~
Mami and I spoke for ages that evening. She convinced me that I should take a step back and let Elena come to me. That I should try and talk to Elena soon to tell her that I love her, that I am proud of her. 
But it ended up with another unsuccessful attempt of speaking to Elena. She was in bed and wanted nothing to do with what I wanted to say. I told her everything that Mami told me I should, ignoring the protests of my insides. 
I do not want to take a step back because I am already so far away. I want to be there for my sister like I should be, there for a hug or for some assurance. But that is not what I tell her, because apparently, that is not what would be the best for her. 
All I want is the best for her. 
I want nothing more than to tell her I want to be a part of her life like I used to be, I want things to just go back to normal. But nothing is that easy. I have to face the consequences of all my mistakes. 
Huge, terrible, life altering mistakes.
I tried again the next morning, but she ignored me completely, heading up to her room without a single utterance of a word. I could practically hear her exhale in relief as the piano chair creaked and waited until she had begun her playing to walk upstairs and sit by her door. 
She has improved at it so much, skyrocketing right past the level that Papi used to play at. The notes rang out at such a pace that I could barely keep track of where the song was going, up, down, fast, slow, loud, soft. 
The rhythms flew through the house and I didn't register the warm liquid slipping down my face until it fell with a splat into my lap. 
It is painful to realise how much I have missed; how much I miss her. 
Her playing is mesmerising and I could feel the emotion that radiates from her and her piano. 
It used to be Papi's, but now it is hers.
Because she has grown up into such a talented person and our father would be so proud of her. 
Me, I don't think he would be so proud of. 
And I hate myself because of it. 
The song broke down into soft chords and if I strained my ears I could hear her quiet whimpers. But I can't comfort her any more. 
No matter how much I want to. 
She will not be comforted by me. She doesn't want me there to comfort her. 
So I creep down the stairs and leave. I drive back to my apartment, back to Olga. 
At this point, I am used to the constant stream of water on my face. 
But there is nobody to blame but myself. 
~~~~~~
The next few weeks were equally as painful, despite Olga's efforts to lighten me up. My mood was down when I woke up in the mornings, and only got worse after training, seeing Elena light up when she spoke to my friends but escape every room I entered, cowering when I glanced over at her, leaving conversations as soon as I joined them. 
It's like she is scared of me, intimidated by me. I hate it. 
Mapi was silent in rehab, which is a big change from the constant stream of chatter I am used to. I don't think she knows what to say to me anymore, knowing what I have done. 
I wouldn't know what to say to me either. 
It is Vicky approaches me one day after training. We are all sat in the changing rooms when wanders over and asks for help with her homework. It is maths, and I tell her with a laugh that I will be no help at all, but she persists, opening her book and pointing at the maths equations, confusion written all over her face. 
I help her as much as I can, laughing at the drawings she has scrawled out on her page, explaining the trigonometry to her as she stares at me intensely. It takes a while, but she gets it eventually, finally answering a question correctly. 
"Nice, Vicky! So much better, so quickly!" 
Mapi stands up from across the room, grabbing her bag and storming out of the room, slamming the door behind her. 
From where they are sitting in quiet conversation, my sister and Aitana look up at the door, their eyes scanning the room. Aitana's eyes land on me first and she rolls them dramatically, shaking her head in what looks like disgust. 
"Vicky, I did that yesterday. I can help you." 
Elena's voice is level, but I can see confusion in her eyes at the scene that had just unfolded. 
Vicky sighs in relief, closing her book and walking across the room to Elena. 
"I forgot you were smart!" She beams, plonking herself down on the seat beside my sister and they both dive into the world of mathematics. 
Aitana is standing up by now, her bag over her shoulder. 
"Alexia, can I speak to you outside?" Her voice is steady as she continues. "There is something wrong with my dribbling and I would like some help."
It is a lie and everyone knows it. There is never anything wrong with Aitana's dribbling. 
But I pick up my bag, following the shorter midfielder out the door, immediately faced by Mapi who stands there, anger all over her face. 
"What the hell are you doing?" Her voice is low and her words come out as a whisper, full of venom. Full of anger. 
It is something I am not used to from Mapi and it takes me off guard. My hesitance gives her the chance to continue.
"Helping Vicky Lopez with her maths when you don't have the first clue whether Elena is even at school. Elena, your sister."
"She goes to school." 
My voice is full of confidence, but Mapi is right, I don't even know how she manages to fit it all in. I don't know the first thing about her timetable. 
She rolls her eyes, scoffing. 
"Do you understand just how much damage you have done?"
I nod, inhaling and exhaling deeply. 
"She hates me, I know. I have ruined everything. It is all my fault."
Mapi nods, but it is Aitana who speaks next. 
"She doesn't even hate you, Alexia. It just shows how much she loves you. You have done all this and she still loves you, still would do absolutely anything to get your approval, your attention."
I blink to stop the tears and bite the insides of my mouth to stop it from trembling. 
"She has been begging for you to notice how hard she has been working. How well she is doing. But you do not, you don't see her, it is like you are blind! And then Vicky Lopez gets a maths question right and you give her more praise than you give Elena for being selected in this team, for working hard, for being so, so incredible." 
If Aitana wasn't whispering to keep this conversation from the ears of the people in the room we just left, she would be fully yelling, her face red and her eyes narrow. 
"She is perfect, Alexia, and it is so sad because you just can't see it, you can't see how good she is, how smart, how kind, caring. And it makes me so, so angry because you have changed her so much in the past few years, and not in a good way."
Mapi puts her hand on Aitana's arm, trying to get her to stop. Mapi knows me well, and knows when I am about to break. 
But the usually stoic midfielder has tears in her eyes when she continues, her voice softening and breaking at the same time. 
"She was such a happy little girl, so excited by everything. She loves you so much and she always looked up to you. But now she is insecure, she is lonely, isolated. She is confused and feels like she needs to fight for validation every day. Everyone has pressure on them in this team, especially when they are young, new blood. Coming from La Masia and the B team you should know this, Alexia. You should know about the pressure better than anyone because I do too. But your sister? She has it worse than anyone because she has all that, but she is your sister. Alexia Putellas, two time Ballon d'Or winner. She has to live up to that in some way and is trying to hard to do it without anyone's help. She is only 15, Alexia. 15."
Aitana stops, but I am not sure whether it is because she has nothing more to say or if it is because she is too upset. She is silenced by weak tears, shaking her head as Mapi places a soft arm around her shoulder. 
"She is right, Alexia." Mapi's voice is soft and she looks at me with that same concerned glint in her eye. "And I don't know what is going on with you, but whatever it is, it needs to be fixed. You have made some significant damage and if you don't do something about it, it will all become irreparable."
"I don't know what to do." It is a cry for help, and it is all I can say without letting my tears escape from me once more. 
Because Aitana's words are nothing I don't know, but the fact that she is saying them, that she feels the need to tell me all that, is enough to tell me that it is not clear to anyone that I already know. 
Because I have been a bad sister, I am not denying it. 
And I am guilty, I feel absolutely terrible. 
Mami said to leave her alone, let her come to me, but I don't think that was her best advice any more, because my sister is struggling. 
She is struggling and I am only making it worse. 
But I can't do anything about it. 
When she was little, she would be the person I would go to when I needed to be cheered up. She would make me smile, laugh, feel better about myself and the world around me. Her small arms would wrap around me, her chubby fingers would wipe my tears from my face and she would chatter and giggle into my ears until I was smiling again. 
She was the light in our household when Papi died, but I think that was partially because she didn't understand what was happening. 
We avoided his study like it had the plague, she would go and sit on the piano stall, practicing the songs he had taught her. 
She gave us endless cuddles, basking in our attention, her heart set on making us feel better, on putting a smile back on our faces. 
She made the darkest time of our lives bearable, she helped me get through the hardest times of my life. 
And this... this is how I repay her. 
"Ale... Alexia? Ale." Mapi's hand is on my shoulder and Aitana looks at me curiously. 
"Stop, just... stop." My voice is soft, and Mapi's eyes soften as I slide down the wall behind me. "I just... I don't know what to do."
Mapi sits down beside me, perhaps thinking that maybe she had been too harsh. 
"I had Elena over yesterday." Mapi's voice is quiet. "She said... she said she misses you, Alexia. And that... she said you told her you were going to take a step back. She thinks you already did. She doesn't want that. She just wants you."
"But I have ruined everything, Maria. This is all my fault." A singular tear finds itself on my cheek and Mapi places an arm around me. 
"You're right, you made so many mistakes. But I know you, I know you love her. She means everything to you. And she loves you as well, Ale. I know you two can get through this, but she is struggling to stay afloat with all this pressure and no support. Aitana and I... we need to look out for her because your Mami works all the time and she doesn't want to burden Alba with her problems and ruin her life. We need to be there for her at the moment because the poor girl is crumbling."
I wish she would realise that I am crumbling too. 
Olga is always there to hold me, to calm me down, but as much as she tries, she can't understand what is going on with Elena. She doesn't know Elena, which I know is my fault. 
But Mami is angry with me, so is Alba. For good reason. 
And Mapi is my best friend, but she needs to be there for Elena. 
All I want to do is cry out for help, but I know I can not because I caused it. 
"I am taking Elena out this afternoon." Aitana speaks up from where she has been stood silently. "I will talk to her again, we will work on it. I'm going to go now, but Alexia, if you need to, you can talk to any one of us."
I nod at her, trying to muster a smile onto my face as she walks back into the changing room. 
"Mapi, you are my best friend." 
She nods. 
"You will be honest?"
She nods again. 
"Do you think this is fixable? Do you think I've ruined my chance of ever getting my Lena back?" 
She rests her head on my shoulder. 
"I hope so. I miss seeing the smiles on both of your faces and truthfully, I don't think that Elena will thrive here if she keeps going on like this. She needs support, from you, your Mami and your sister and I don't really think she is getting it."
"But Mami and Alba are there for her!" I find myself getting defensive of my family. 
"I know they are, but she needs more than that at the moment. She has been skipping school because nobody is home to tell her to go to it, she has been skipping meals because nobody is home to eat with her. She doesn't sleep properly, she doesn't eat properly. It is not your mother's fault that she has to work, or Alba's fault that Elena doesn't want to burden her, but she needs more support than she is getting." 
My brain is telling me that Mapi is wrong, that my sister is fine, that my family is fine. But in my heart, I know she is right. And it makes me feel sick. 
Because if it wasn't for me being such a terrible sister, such a terrible person, Elena would not be struggling so much. She would not need Mami or Alba as much as she does, she would be thriving in this environment. 
But she is not. 
The pressure is something I only really felt when I got older, when I had thicker skin. I had a force of people around me to fall back on, to get support from. But Elena has so much pressure building on her at 15, with less experience, with less people to support her. 
And the pressure will keep building and building on top of her, until it is so high that everything falls over, falling down on top of her until she breaks. 
As if reading my mind, Mapi continues after her pause. 
"And if she does crumble under all this pressure, she will need so much support. Aitana and I will be there for her, if nobody else is."
~~~~~~ hope you enjoyed :)
Will probably be back to elena's perspective next chapter, just thought it'd be easier to write this in a different one
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tarotwithavi · 2 days
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What changes do you need to make in order to grow as a person?
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
How to choose a pile?
Close your eyes and take a deep breath and ask the angels to show you the right pile for you and open your eyes. The first pile that catches your attention is the right pile for you.
Masterlist
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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT 🫶🏻💞
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Pile 1
Stop thinking and start doing. I see that you plan out things: you plan your workouts, your schedule, and how you will spend your day to be more productive, but you never actually put actions into your plans. You may be stuck in this cycle. I also see that some of you may procrastinate a lot, or some of you may have ADHD. You want to do things, but you don't have the energy to put actions into them. This is something you want to work on, but it seems beyond your control. You need to start slowly, doing one thing at a time. You don't need to do everything on your list; just start by doing one thing each day and increase the number of tasks every week or every day. It depends on you. You can change yourself by simply doing things you have already planned. You have the blueprint; now you just need to follow the instructions. You don't need to plan anything because you already have the plan. You just need to put actions into it. Sometimes you don't see the progress because there is little progress. You are not seeing progress because there is no progress at all, and you are not putting in enough effort to see it.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Pile 2
Stop thinking that you already know everything. A person who thinks they know everything learns nothing. You are still young, and there are many things you need to learn to get through life. You may think you are mature enough to say anything based on your own judgments, but who are you fooling? There may have been moments when you were right about certain things, but that is not always the case. You need to learn, and only by learning can you grow as a person. Be aware of what is going on around you; do not be oblivious because you may have the tendency to ignore your surroundings to feel better, but that is not something you can always do. Sometimes you have to deal with things, and sometimes you will have to deal with some really nasty things. “Hope for the best, prepare for the worst”; this has to be a motto for life. I am not saying this because you will have a difficult life; I am saying this because I want you to be prepared for absolutely anything that is thrown at you. Honor the people around you; appreciate every person you meet, learn something from them, and see how drastically your life changes for the better.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Pile 3
Stop self-sacrificing. Stop doing too much for others, especially for those who don't deserve it and who don't appreciate your actions and sacrifices. All your life, you have been a warrior. You have taken the lead and done things; you have been the logical one. But now it's time to choose yourself. I'm not saying that being a warrior is a bad thing; it is actually a great thing, but you need to balance that out. You are too logical, and you neglect your emotions. This may be why you are not able to deal with emotional people because you are not using that side of yourself. You have taken on the leadership role, but sometimes even a leader needs rest. Be more balanced and align your rational side with your emotional side. It's almost as if all your life you had the desire to fly in the sky, to be at the top, and you have done everything to achieve it, which is really amazing. But in all that, you have forgotten your roots. You have forgotten that even birds who are capable of flying for days and months require rest. (I don't know if that's right or wrong but that felt poetic lol) Well, some can hunt, eat, and sleep while flying, but that's another topic. You got the point, right?
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
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bbyobbyo · 1 day
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Ever since you stopped using his Spotify account in the mornings, you find other ways to mess with your boyfriend.
A short continuation of this fic, but can be read as a standalone.
content: fluff, established relationship, idol!Jihoon, banter, reader and jihoon just have a permanent jam session going on, they’re in love i swear
wc: 857
note: ahhh they’re back!! thank you to everyone who read the first part and gave it love😊 this has been rotting my brain for a while and i originally was playing with this concept for the original but couldn’t pull it together but we’re here now! shoutout to @highvern because it was partly inspired by her fic “Between the Titles” which is such a great read that i highly recommend along with literally everything else she writes!! all the songs featured here are real and from an era of kpop I hold near and dear to my heart so if you recognize any of them, you’re a real one 🥰
Jihoon is not a morning person, never has been. As he sits in the dressing room of the filming studio, he can feel his eyelids getting increasingly heavy. Some of his members are actively sleeping, in fact, and Jihoon knows he’ll be joining them soon if Wonwoo takes any longer in that makeup chair.
Blasting in his ears is his usual Bruno Mars playlist, a sad attempt to try to recover his energy before he knocks out next to Mingyu sleeping on a mat on the floor, but to no avail because his mind slowly slips away until a piercing airhorn noise jolts him awake.
SEVENTEEN TEEN TEEN NEOWANA SAI E
Uhh. This was definitely not his Daily Bruno Mars Mix.
He immediately searches his screen to find out what happened when he finds his answer in the form of a text from you.
[8:18 am] good morning sleepyhead :)
[8:18 am] hope I didnt scare you too bad :)
He scrunches his face up in disbelief, half amused that you managed to catch him off guard with possibly the most annoying wake up song on Seventeen’s discography, and half annoyed at the realization that he must’ve forgotten to cancel your Spotify Jam session from yesterday.
He decides to leave your text on read. After all, he has plenty of time to be petty today. Furiously searching through his library, he queues up a song and before Mingyu can finish singing the first chorus, he smashes the next track button in smug anticipation.
Now Playing: Fxxk U • Gain, Bumkey
And he doesn’t have to wait long before he gets your reply.
[8:20 am] oh i see how it is
Now Playing: This is War • MBLAQ
If Jihoon wasn’t awake before, he definitely is now. Even as he gets called in to do his makeup next, he thinks carefully about his next move.
Now Playing: LOSER • BIGBANG
Now Playing: WHO, YOU? • G-DRAGON
An audible scoffs escapes from his lips as he involuntarily tilts his head back in amusement, much to the dismay of his makeup artist who had just started on his foundation. He mutters a shy sorry before resuming his search for a reply. Maybe he needs to take a different approach to this if he hopes to continue having Jam sessions with you in the future.
Now Playing: Whatcha Doin’ Today • 4Minute
As Jihoon eventually discovers, his hopes to change the topic of conversation were in vain as two songs were suddenly queued one after another.
Now Playing: Why Don’t You Know • CHUNG HA, Nucksal
Next in Queue: Mind Your Own Business • Ailee
Jihoon thinks he’s met his match, coming to the realization that he could never out sass the love of his life. But he wasn’t willing to back down so easily either.
Now Playing: I’m so sick • Apink
Next in Queue: Because of you • After School
Your next move nearly sends him to tears.
Now Playing: Excuse Me • AOA
Next in Queue: You Don’t Love Me • Spica
Next in Queue: I ain’t going home tonight • Navi, Geeks
Next in Queue: I Don’t Need a Man • miss A
As he chuckles to himself for what seems like the hundredth time this morning, this newfound form of entertainment suddenly becomes incredibly precious. Although you see each other nearly every day, Jihoon realizes just how much he misses you, talking to you about everything and nothing at all, bantering like you’ve known each other for your entire lives.
Now Playing: Am I too easy? • U-KISS
...
Now Playing: Mystery • Beast
Even though he couldn’t be with you physically, he knew you were enjoying yourself just as much as him on the other side. He could almost picture your smile of satisfaction as you found your next song, knowing that he would appreciate your humor. And appreciate he did, happily tapping away at his screen until his makeup artist puts on his finishing touches and tells him to call the next member.
Now Playing: Gotta Go • CHUNG HA
Next in Queue: I’m Busy • 2NE1
Next in Queue: Plz Don’t Be Sad • HIGHLIGHT
Now Playing: Okay Dokey • MINO, ZICO
Little does he know that his members are in the corner snickering at the sight, knowing that only one thing could have their producer smiling like an idiot at his phone the whole morning.
Soon enough, Jihoon and his members get swept up into their schedule involving the filming of various contents for their Youtube Channel, a task that usually takes the entire day if a game is involved. Thankfully, the game allowed for members to go home early, a rare treat considering how competitive his members can get when it comes to shooting content.
After his usual rounds of “good work everyone” to the company staff and his members, he gets ready to see the person who been on his mind (and in his ears) since the morning. Taking out his phone, he queues one last song while exiting the building.
Now Playing: Run to you • SEVENTEEN
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tiredsmashbros · 1 day
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LIP BITE COMIC PART ONE {CLICK HERE}
GOOD GOD IT'S FINALLY DONE... maybe. even though i still plan on making a part 3 i'm going to take a fatass break first + plan it out more better in the future. for now enjoy this meal silly goobers
aight now for some quick behind the scenes lore: this took way longer than i was expecting with 17 PAGES in total while taking the opportunity to experiment this type of sketch + comic style. i have a BAD habit of starting a story with just a minor draft idea, and with the more i progress the more i start changing the plot. like- this was supposed to end with smg4 in the bathroom embarrassed but i didn't like it anymore + the scene of smg3 opening the pickle jar was rewritten to fit a better narrative. i have a difficulty elaborating a short story so i might do mini comics for now as practice. furthermore, i tend to get wAY into making sure the character's are accurate as possible to the original material. been doing my best to get out of that strict mindset and just enjoy it being fun and remind myself it's okay to break some cracks. doesn't need to be perfect after all ;^)
other than that, i want to sincerely thank everyone for supporting and enjoying the first part of this silly comic. never have i ever received such a positive response that not only has scared the shit out of me, but motivated me to make more for me as a person, artist, and for everyone in the smg4 community. genuinely has made me so happy this past month and i can't explain how much i am so excited to just start drawing these guys and everyone else in the cast + other fun stuff!! 💛
now i'm going to play wuwa and hide for a day bye bye :3c
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wrioluvr · 3 days
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subby vampire x dom male reader pt 2 pt 1
thank u guys for liking kliff!! he's so baby. felt kinda mean and thought about a scenario where reader is like, a regular monster fucker and poor kliff finds out he hooked up with another vampire and gets super jealous teehee... but this is wholesome tho.
content: reader is kind of a player, blowjob (reader receiving), reader loves tormenting the poor old man, more plot-focused than pure smut
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★ ; 🦇🍷. . ♱
after visiting kliff at his crumbling manor a few more times, you decided that you were getting tired of making the trip out into the woods everytime, and invited him over to your house instead, an invitation he eagerly accepted. though he kept a calm composure, inwardly, his thoughts were running wild - he would finally be able to bask in a whole home full of your scent.... maybe even steal a few small trinkets he could toy with whenever he felt lonely... or... or even get a feel of your bed, where he fantasised about waking up next to you and spending the rest of his days as your faithful househusband. oh, how delightful.
"thank you ever so much for allowing me to enter your abode. i am most honoured." thanking you profusely, he elegantly sat down on your sofa, only to immediately scrunch up his face in discomfort. you stared at him, puzzled. "what's wrong? you don't like my home?"
"no, no... it's not that... it's just that... this scent is so familiar. in an unnverving way..." he mumbled, talking to himself. suddenly, a look of recognition, mixed with horror, dawned on his face. "correct me if i'm wrong, but... there's not a chance you've had another vampire over.... is there?"
"oh! i forgot you vampires have a heightened sense of smell. yeah, i hooked up with another vampire like, 3 weeks ago." you said nonchantly, like it was the most insignificant thing ever. kliff merely gaped at you, aghast at your casualness. "so... so... i'm not your first vampire relationship?" he asked meekly, almost like he was afraid of the answer.
"well, yes. i dated, hmm...." you start to list them on your fingers. "two vampires, one werewolf, one merman... oh, right, and one evil ass fairy. he was mean."
poor kliff looked like he was about to collapse, his hand clutching his chest dramatically. thankfully he was sitting down, otherwise he would have fallen over. "where on earth do you even find these creatures?"
"i get around."
"and you never thought to mention this?!"
"i mean, i didn't really think it was important..."
kliff sighed, suddenly feeling a little insecure at his complete lack of romantic experience in contrast to your many flings. "may i at least see what your past vampire suitors looked like?" he didn't want to admit it, but he was suddenly feeling very clingy, even more than usual. he had to be better than all your exes! so that you wouldn't leave him like you left them!
"sure. here you go." you pull out your phone and show him a picture, only for kliff to gasp loudly and clutch his chest even tighter. what a drama queen.
"HIM."
"you know him??"
"that little whore was going around sleeping with every man and woman in town a hundred years ago! i cannot BELIEVE he is still so promiscuous in this day and age. he even seduced you..."
"woah! language, kliff!"
kliff stops mid-ramble and clears his throat in embarassment. "my apologies. this is most uncouth of me. i do not know why i am getting so frustrated over this. the two of you are not seeing each other anymore, correct?"
"yes. you're the only one i'm seeing right now."
"and, if i may be so bold to inquire,,,, how was he like as a lover?"
"he was kinda annoying." kilff let a smirk escape his lips upon hearing this. "i knew it-" "the head was good though."
"what- what does 'head' mean?"
"he sucked my dick." you say bluntly.
"oh, good heavens."
"don't be a prude! wait... kliff, are you jealous of him?"
"i most certainly am not."
"at your big age? please be serious." you tease, amused at how possessive he suddenly got.
"do NOT make fun of me. i said i'm not." the pout adorning his face said otherwise.
kliff barely noticed it, but slowly he inched closer and closer to you, eyes scanning your neck as he frantically searched for bite marks.
"did he bite you anywhere? did it hurt? you must know, i would never even consider drinking from you, right?" he took your hand, eyes searching desperately for validation, any form of praise that indicated you thought he was the better vampire.
you rolled your eyes. "jeez, kliff. i didn't take you for the possessive type. don't worry, none of my previous vampire lovers have drunk from me."
that did little to reassure him, since he was on the same page. "then... then... i must be better at this 'head' thing!" he declares, face full of misplaced determination. you almost double over laughing.
"it's not a competition! my god, you're so unserious."
"it does not matter to me! i must be better than that lustful shame of a vampire at every aspect. especially since we are of the same species."
"okay, okay. calm down. i'll let you try."
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
"just let me know you can't breathe or whatever. i'll guide you through your first time, yeah?" kliff nods, a blush extremely prominent on his undead features as he knelt between your thighs. he quite enjoyed this... submissive position.
"also- watch the fangs." the authoritative, yet gentle tone of your voice sent shivers down his spine.
he himself could be considered a monster, but he paled in comparison to the monster that sprung out of your pants once he clumsily undid the zipper. kliff gasped, a look of pure lust and nervousness written all over his expression as your slightly erect cock hovered over his face.
"so... basically... you just put it inside your mouth, then start sucking it. easy enough, right? come on, don't tell me you've never heard of a blowjob in your entire existence."
"of course i have..... i admit, i own quite a bit of... erotic fiction." he mumbles, eyes still on your cock, cheeks growing redder by the second. "but, goodness, it's so different seeing a real phallus up close. especially one of your size."
"phallus??? just say cock."
"mhm...." he hesitates, unsure where to even begin. flustered, he looks up imploringly, silently begging for you to guide him.
you chuckle at his frozen state, completely at a loss on what to do. "so needy. i'll help you."
tenderly, you run a hand through his soft hair, applying just a little bit of power to tug his head forward, guiding him to your tip. obediently, he opened his mouth, taking the shaft inside. it was warm, his rough tongue grazing over your tip, causing you to grip his hair a little tighter. kliff let out a masochistic moan in response. slowly, he ventured further down your length, but unable to reach the base without gagging. he looked up at you with apologetic eyes, but you squeezed his shoulder to let him know he was doing well. "good job, kliff. you're a natural." spurred on by your praise, kliff found a lewd rhythm, mouth bobbing up and down in a continuous passionate attempt to make you feel good.
your small grunts of pleasure kept him going. panting, you ask, "you sure you've never done this before, kliff? you're so good." he frantically shakes his head, mouth still full of cock, as if the idea that he engaged in such intimate acts with anyone but you was horrifying. he was loyal like that. it was intoxicating, the head only vampires could provide - fangs lightly grazing your cock's sensitive areas, the slight thrill unmatched. merman head was sloppy, werewolf head was rough, but vampire head was a little dangerous. you liked that.
soon enough, you were about to cum. you warned him, patting his shoulder twice, he vigorously nodded, giving you permission to cum inside his mouth. he'd only ever been used to having blood in his mouth, so having your cum inside instead was a new experience. but he liked it. maybe a little too much, as he swallowed it so enthusiastically. you gazed upon him affectionately, finding his virgin excitement over such lewd matters endearing.
"how was i?" the breathless question hung in the air, a reminder of the atmosphere thick with your intertwined tension.
cupping his face with one hand, the other stroking his hair soothingly, you muttered the words he most wanted to hear. "you were better than him."
kliff jumps into your arms, nuzzling his face into your shoulder. "thank you. you're the absolute best." he's so content to spend the rest of his days with you. treat him with care, yeah?
>ᵥᵥ< 💘
tags: @4eaever @szapizzapanda @flyingsquids @vampmasc
omg i'm so happy with this one, one of my fav writings i've ever done so far. i felt like i characterised kliff and captured their dynamic quite well here hehehe
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feistyvirghoe · 1 day
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 1 - you guys have such bright, very infectious because i’m just so giddy right now, yalls energy just shines bright like the sun omg, so full of positivity and love, happy as a child fr. i feel like people just like to consume your energy, has them all over the place, like pleading, there’s a push and pull effect you have, like you can be the most positive, optimistic person full of fucking light but then you have that other side to you that has people on their knees, like they can’t hold it in with you, the focus is on you guys, you’re hardworking and when you’re ready to fucking commit to something and go you just do it and get it started but you also know how to be inclusive and make others feel welcomed. i feel like people just want you to look at them, acknowledge them, you guys can adapt easily and may be spread out everywhere, you can’t just stay stuck to one thing and even within relationships im not saying you’re non-committal but you know your worth and some people and things just aren’t worth your time, you’re like a temptation, watch out for users and takers that may want to swindle you for whatever reason. you’re in tune with your femme side, you truly don’t need anyone to validate you and that’s a flex babe…it’s all you, something about the way you love and care for others, never dim that part of yourself, it’s so beautiful, the way you can own your mfkn power is by not letting bozos or losers come in and try to knock u off ur damn throne, standing up for yourself, believing that you’re fucking powerful just by being your true authentic self, confidently strutting your stuff, not giving away too much of yourself as well, connecting with your innermost self, reminding yourself who you are deep down inside, not being swayed the outside opinions of others, you may be a lil homebody and that’s okay..you’re sure of yourself and you don’t need anyone up in your face trying to fucking control you and make u feel small, by continuing to protect yourself in a healthy way, strong fucking boundaries is what needs to be set, don’t let these weirdos try to come in and fucking knock down your walls with their hateration and disgusting jealousy, show yourself off, embrace that fire within you, dont second guess yourself or make yourself small to fit in, burn bright baby boo. an affirmation for u - “i am a badass warrior and i conquer self doubt like it’s my fucking job!”
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 2 - your gentleness makes u fucking strike like lightning and i know you’re like “how?” babe we need more kind people like you on this planet, this world is so full of hatred and evil people, you’re kindness and compassion and just love for others makes you fucking strike babe, you’re a giver, very generous individual but i can see that you protect your heart as well, you know not to let shady people come and try to steal your energy, yeah that’s a thing, and you may need to be careful of that too, giving yourself away to undeserving people. you’re so content and just emotionally fulfilled on your own, u truly do not need someone else to fill your cup but im betting there’s a lot of people that would love to if you’d let them, you’re allowed be taken care of and poured into. but with how abundant your energy is and just how rich you are in spirit, of course it’d attract a bunch of energy vampires, just people with weird intentions. very emotionally mature and also vulnerable as well, well with the right people of course but you don’t hide how you’re feeling, and thats literally okay, you’re allowed to fucking let yourself feel free expressing what and how you’re feeling if that makes sense haha. you may throw people off, it’s like they dont expect YOU, like literally just you, your compassionate self. you don’t chase after people bc you know you’re already secure inside so don’t doubt that. maybe you really second guess yourself and how you’re coming off to others but i feel like people just see such a pure genuine soul, not just a nice person but a very kindhearted soul. you make others feel calm, like just content and chill haha. i feel like yall just make people smile, like smirking to themselves just thinking about you, omg admiring you and adoring you, u could be all up in people’s heads, unforgettable, maybe some just want to indulge themselves in you, just be cautious and aware of snakes hidden in the grass. i feel like i could go on and on about you guys, i dont want to make it too long though ;) your sweetness dude, you’re just like a lil fucking teddy bear ahhhh, someone who loves to help others, doesn’t matter what it may be just serving, wanting to be useful to others? maybe ppl have made u feel worthless bc of how kind you are like as if that’s boring or some shit, ignore those ppl, we need more kindness and love, don’t hide that side of yourself idc, let others who want to appreciate you show you their love. you’re also very in tune with your spiritual side and i feel you may dim that down too as if you’re not gifted i mean you’re here right?? embrace that side of yourself, you don’t even know how helpful you are to others, i feel like your generosity and just your pure loving soul is what puts a smile on others faces, so balanced, you’re just an unforgettable nurturer, a whole sweetie pie, a cutie pie ahhh, just such a sweet soul okay here’s an affirmation for you <3 “success is my middle name; watch me fucking conquer.” “i choose to surround myself with people who fucking respect me” and to own your power i feel like you just need to see you more, like you’re the one who can stay calm during the stormy weather, a shield for others, very protective over your loved ones and self, stay true to that boo! <33
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 3 - i feel like y’all are my glamorous pile, the ones ready to put their feet on the fucking ground and nobody ain’t going to fucking get in your way and stop you lmfao i’m hearing under the influence by chris brown, i feel like you guys got people feeling like they on drugs around you, your energy is intoxicating and addicting, some may even wanna knock u up to keep you as theirs wtf okay anyways hahahaha okay i feel like the way yall strike is like you’re in that empress energy very strong minded, in touch with your feminine side and you know when to cut a bitch off but then with that, the same people you cut off may try to come back and slither their way back into your life omg what the hell, so you guys are like the “heartbreakers” but not really because you just know your fucking worth more than what lames can give to you and not just that how they’re with you as well, goes for any relationship, you know when to fucking walk away and you’re not taking weird bullshit from anyone, you don’t play, i feel like your anger plays a part in making you fucking powerful, when you’re done you’re done and you can easily see through people’s bullshit, their facade, in hearing shit you up, lol u piss people off, idk what you’re truly doing, it could honestly just be you and your awareness, you’re not going to stand down and make yourself a tiny purse dog lmfao, very sassy as well, like no one can fucking control you, even if they wanted to, you guys make people uncomfortable but that’s there own issue, you may the wrong people for you uncomfortable haha, they try to fucking go and go at you relentlessly attacking you for no reason, so i can see why you’re protective of yourself and u don’t stand down, i mean with weird people like this honestly weird energy like this coming for y’all i understand why, it’s like you’re power makes others want to overthrow you and try and like one up you, just weird, got people competing for u and against you, i feel like they’re jealous of your fucking success and not just material success but your ambition, your drive, your resilience, never giving up on yourself no matter how hard it gets, you’re your own positive light in your life, you know how to make yourself happy, still shining, blowing out your candles, celebrating your fucking self like you should! yeah your fucking power just makes others despise you lmfao weird as hell, you live life on your own goddamn terms and you’re not sitting around waiting for anyone, a leader on your own, it’s like a natural quality of yours, you just know how to be up in front exuding dominance, like a lion, your walk may just give off CONFIDENCE i mean you have the emperor here, you’re just a fucking natural at it, it comes easily to you so i can see why others may feel offended by your power but they’re just projecting and not seeing their own power within themself, you look ahead, you don’t look for others, they look for you, goddamn lmfao! affirmations for you guys - “i’m letting go of negative bullshit, toxic people, and self doubt. i’m creating a fucking epic life on my own terms!” & “i am enough, i have enough, and damn right im fucking worth it!”
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 4 - i can see you guys regenerating in hermit mode, like taking some time to be alone with yourself building your power back up and cleansing yourself of all the weird energies you may have encountered, you like your solitude, my loners here, the ones who don’t mind leaving the party early, ready to go home and chill the fuck out or going on adventures by yourself and taking some time to just connect with your higher self if u wanna say that, just going within and seeing that light within yourself, you blossom on your own, you know how to make sure busy, it’s like when quarantine was around heavy, it didn’t phase this group, maybe it was even like a fuck yeah moment, nobody outside to bother you hahaha, like you guys may love to work out and get back to yourself that way, doing yoga, stretching, moving your body, but you may also be very cautious of the outside world, like you just jumped off the boat into uncharted territory taking time to feel out the place/environment/energy just watching where you’re stepping, or what you’re stepping into, making your way as you go along whatever journey you may be on, weighing out your options, not making hasty decisions, a thinker, maybe even a realist too. calm, balanced people here, like a lot of introspection, a very nostalgic person too. embracing the old memories, in tune with your childhood self, doing things that fuel your soul and what makes you feel the most peaceful, maybe you guys struggle with the mind so grounding yourself and staying away from the crowd is what helps you to stay sane and sharp, for you to be your most powerful self i feel like you just need that time away from everyone. yep it’s like you can’t really count on other people, do people make you second guess yourself, it’s like you’re there for everyone but they couldn’t even be bothered to hear you out, don’t give so much of yourself away to ungrateful people. you matter a lot and i can see this may be draining you as well, probably why you’re very cautious, but remember don’t keep yourself stuck on others weird projections and how they may try to take from you, it’s okay to be alone and regroup, if some one is offended by that then that’s there issue. the way u, my group four babies can uplift yourself and own your power is by letting yourself fucking shine and put yourself out there, confidently, i feel like people like making you guys feel small and quiet like a mouse, but you’re not a goddamn mouse you’re the fucking cat, and cats do whatever the hell they want to do, use your voice and own that fucking power, your words hold weight, speak more positively over your life and your self, unbiased opinions and being straightforward with your communication, don’t close yourself off from true unconditional love too..you deserve to be recognized and appreciated for all you do!!! keep fucking going, don’t give up on love, that goes for loving yourself too!! every fucking part of you and yes even the ugly bc the ugly is actually beautiful and makes you see the parts of you that you want to grow from and evolve beautifully into a better version of yourself! affirmations for y’all - “i’m unstoppable and nothing can hold me back, not even my fucking fears.” “my uniqueness shines like a freaking diamond! confidence? it’s my middle name, baby!” “i’m a badass boss babe and i don’t give a damn about what anyone thinks. i rock my confidence like a boss!”
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𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐏𝐀𝐂, 𝐢 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢’𝐦 𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐢𝐦 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐡𝐞, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐢 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐮𝐩, 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲 𝐟𝐫, 𝐢 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞, 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐭!! 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐟 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞, 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐧𝐨 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐮 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐌𝐖𝐀𝐇 (^з^)-☆
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fyorina · 21 hours
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ᡣ𐭩 CHAMPAGNE KISSES
FEATURING: pm!dazai osamu
SUMMARY: in a desperate attempt to try to get you to drink with him, dazai offers up a secret he's never told anyone... and how could you possible refuse that? AKA the first kiss fic.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: here is the promised second fic! another light hearted one :D (warnings: fem!reader, there are some implications of reader and chuuya being taught to use their bodies as tools - as implied in canon - but nothing else really, this is light-hearted as promised)
You don’t usually drink. 
In fact, you usually stay as far away from any type of alcohol as you possibly can because the one time you did drink, you ended up passed out on the floor of the Colonel’s office with no recollection of how you got there. You blame Nakahara Chuuya because he is a bad influence and stole one of Kouyou’s bottles of wine, sneaking it up to your office to convince you to drink with him to celebrate your sixteenth birthday. The Colonel was severely unimpressed with you and you were severely embarrassed, more so when you found out that he spent half of the night cleaning up after you. 
You blame Chuuya. 
Neither of you can recall how you’d gotten separated that night, but you’re certain that it’s his fault somehow.
“Just a few glasses,” Dazai complains, a pout tugging at his lips as he drapes himself half over you and half over your couch, dangling a bottle of champagne in your face as if to tempt you. “We just ended the biggest conflict Yokohama has ever seen. I was just promoted to executive. Celebrate.”
“No,” you tell him instantly, putting your palm to his face and shoving him away from you. 
Dazai instantly lets out a string of complaints, unbalanced as he rolls off the couch and onto the ground. He scowls up at you, disgruntled and irate as he pushes himself back to his feet and throws himself right back down where he was, perhaps even more on top of you than he had been before. You sigh, he looks distinctly pleased by the withering look you give him.
“You drank with Chuuya.” Dazai instantly throws the fact in your face, as offended about it as he was the day he found out you and Chuuya got drunk for the first time without him. As if it was your fault that he was sent away on a two-week mission in Sapporo to try to draw Murasaki and her men out of Yokohama and back to their homefront. 
He didn’t speak to either of you for days.
It was the most peaceful few days of your life.
No, you’re joking, you spent a whole week doing paperwork for him as an apology, but no matter how much he tries to convince you to drink with him so he can be even with Chuuya, you deny it because you have no interest in drinking again any time soon.
“You drank with Chuuya and you won’t drink with me. You hate me,” Dazai complains, dropping his head into the crook of your neck. “You want me dead.”
“Dazai,” you start, but he doesn’t even let you get out a second word.
“You can’t even deny it,” Dazai accuses, pulling off of you to glare at you. “I’m supposed to be your best friend. Not Chuuya. You’re trying to replace me with him.”
You give him a blank look right back, and distantly, you wonder how you ended up in this position, regretting that Mori ever pulled you back to Yokohama from Kyoto, desperately wishing to go back to the city just so you can escape Dazai’s dramatics. Maybe you’ll ask him now that the Dragon’s Head Conflict has ended. 
His expression shifts into one of offense, as if he can read your thoughts. 
“Take that back,” he demands.
“I didn’t say anything,” you say, appalled.
“You didn’t need to, it was all over your face. Take it back.”
You lean forward, hand lifting to his face to squish his cheeks together. He squints at you, aggrieved, but you don’t let him yank his face out of your grip.
“I am not drinking with you,” you tell him firmly, tired of this conversation, you’ve been going back and forth about it with him for almost thirty minutes. You duly ignore the way his eyes droop and the way he sticks his bottom lip out—a ridiculous expression considering you’re still squishing his cheeks. “You’re welcome to have a few drinks yourself, but I am not going to be cleaning up after you.”
You drop your hand back to your lap and relax back against the couch, raising your eyebrows when Dazai only continues to pout in your direction. At once, a glimmer of mischief flashes through his visible eye and instantly, you’re on edge, tilting your head to the side as you wait for him to speak. 
With no concept of personal space, clearly, he leans forward again, lips curling up into a suspicious smile. “What if we made a deal?” he asks, looking mighty pleased with himself when your eyes narrow onto him, interest piqued.
“What type of deal?” you ask dubiously, not entirely convinced that he has something up his sleeve that could convince you to drink again.
“If you drink with me, I’ll tell you something about me that I’d never admit sober.”
 Oh.
Dazai smiles like he’s won. 
You click your tongue sharply and then say, “Pour me a glass.”
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This was a mistake. 
You don’t know where Dazai got his hands on two bottles of champagne, but you almost would’ve preferred his choice of whiskey to it. The bubbles have gone straight to your head, your entire body feels light and Dazai has become far more touchy than he usually is. It started out with subtle brushes—he moved closer to you, thigh pressed to yours as he spoke animatedly about his portion of the last mission, occasionally knocking his shoulder into yours. He’s no doubt over-exaggerating the grandeur of it all, but you find yourself smiling as he waves his hands around and describes the epic staging of his capture and how he almost died at the hands of the enemy because Chuuya ‘can’t function without Dazai there to order him around.’
You think Chuuya would punch him in the face if he heard Dazai say that, but you think you’ll let it slide this time because Dazai looks cute happy rambling on about the mission and boasting his feats. His cheeks are tinted pink from the alcohol and he’s talking so fast that you can hardly keep up.
Dazai had been weird the past two weeks. You thought he’d be excited with his promotion to executive and beating both you and Chuuya in the race to the open seat, but he’s been oddly glum. Hasn’t risen to the bait of Chuuya’s gibes, hasn’t chased you around headquarters to bother you about one thing or another; when people congratulate him for his promotion, his gaze slides past them as if they aren’t even there. You and Chuuya have been trying to figure out what’s wrong with him but every time you guys try, it’s like he knows to evade you.
This is the most ‘normal’ you’ve seen him in almost two weeks.
“What were you going to tell me?” you finally ask curiously when the conversation lulls as Dazai reaches to pour himself another glass.
He pauses, gaze cutting to the side to look at you. Your eyes narrow and for a moment, neither of you move, just staring at one another. Then Dazai pointedly continues to pour himself another glass.
Notably, not answering your question.
You scowl at him. “You are not getting out of this, Dazai Osamu,” you say, irate. If your voice is a little slurred, you ignore it. “You promised.”
Dazai makes a noise in the back of his throat—something caught between a complaint and a whimper—and you lean a little closer to him, intrigued, watching as his face steadily gets redder.
“Oh my god,” you say more to yourself than him. “You really are embarrassed. Come on, tell me, it can’t be that bad.” 
“I’m not drunk enough,” he protests, trying to physically turn his body away from you, but you shift closer to him, half leaning on his lap so you can keep your gaze trained on his face. “Stop that, get off.” 
“No,” you say instantly, delighted at the change in demeanor. “I’m drunk enough. Tell me. It’s time.”
The expression Dazai shoots at you is nothing short of withering, the look in his eyes hateful, you only give him a simpering smile in return. He pointedly turns his head away from you and mumbles something under his breath that you can’t hear. You frown as you lean in a little more.
“Speak up,” you tell him, nudging your shoulder into his and you can see him scowl, cheeks flushed, chin raised high. 
“I’ve never had my first kiss,” Dazai rushes out as if it’s his greatest shame, refusing to look at you.
You stare for a moment and then you snort.
“Did you just… laugh at me?” Dazai’s head snaps toward you, thoroughly offended.
“No,” you say immediately, forcing the smile off of your face as you look at him, but as soon as you catch the pink tint on his cheeks, your hand is flying to your mouth to muffle another giggle, this one far more obvious than the last.
Dazai looks entirely insulted. “You did. You’re laughing at me. You’re laughing at me.”
“I’m sorry,” you gasp through a wheeze. “I’m sorry, I just-you’ve got to be lying. There’s no way, I mean-”
Dazai bristles. “Stop laughing at me,” Dazai complains, burying his face in his hands, he covers his cheeks as he turns to glare at you. “I don’t know why you’re so surprised, it’s not like the slug has either.”
“Chuuya has had his first kiss, Dazai,” you say before you can think over your words and instantly Dazai’s brows are furrowing, eye squinting as he looks at you.
You think you’ve made a fatal mistake. The alcohol has made your tongue far too loose.
“How do you know that?” he asks suspiciously, staring at you intently as he waits for an answer.
Shit. You stare at him for a moment, contemplating your options because there’s no way in hell that you’re admitting to Dazai Osamu that you were Nakahara Chuuya’s first kiss. But the longer you wait, the more suspicious he’s getting, you can tell, and you have a feeling that if you do lie, he’s going to figure it out right away.
“He told me,” you finally answer and instantly, Dazai’s gaze sharpens.
Fuck.
“Liar,” he accuses, and you can see that even under the influence of four glasses of champagne, his mind still works sharply—a bit slower, maybe, because even Dazai Osamu is not immune to the effects of alcohol, though he does clearly have a ridiculously high tolerance. 
You see his thoughts whirling, racing to put together the pieces laid out before him, and you watch as he suddenly straightens in his seat, eyes wide. “Dazai-”
“No,” he breathes out, horrified. “No. No. You’re lying. You must be lying.”
“Dazai,” you say again, but he doesn’t let you finish.
“Noooooo,” Dazai complains, louder, more aggrieved. He tugs at his hair, squeezes his eyes shut. “No. No. Noooooo, I can’t accept this. Revoke it. Revoke it immediately.”
You blink. “Dazai,” you start slowly, “I can’t just revoke it. That’s-It’s not how that works, what-”
“REVOKE IT!”
“Jesus Christ. Fine. Revoked. It's been revoked.”
Dazai lets out a long breath, leaning back against the couch as he turns another flinty look onto you. “You’re so disgusting.”
“Look in a mirror,” you snap back, irritated.
“No, you look in a mirror. You’ve kissed a-” he gags as if he can hardly bring himself to say the words. “You’ve kissed a slug. You’ve kissed a slug, you’re so disgusting, I can hardly stand to look at you.”
“You’re so fucking dramatic, Dazai,” you snort, rolling your eyes at the genuine repugnance painted all over his face. But you watch as the disgust suddenly disappears, melting into a conflicted expression that you have trouble reading. “You really haven’t had your first kiss?”
You don’t really know what you expected. Well, you would have thought that Dazai would have some experience—maybe not as much as you or Chuuya, the two of you have been trained in utilizing your bodies for strategic purposes, but you would’ve thought maybe he found someone to experiment with. 
Although, you suppose you shouldn’t really be that surprised. Mori is Dazai’s mentor, and he has the boy constantly swamped with missions and operation preparations, keeping him carefully under his thumb so that no one else can taint the control he has over his precious Demon Prodigy—Dazai likely doesn’t even have the time to even think of stuff like this, much less go out of his way to experience it himself. 
Dazai doesn’t respond, pointedly turning his face away from you. 
“So what if I haven’t?” Dazai snips, regaining his cool facade, even if it did take a bit longer while under the influence of the champagne. “Maybe, I’m saving it for someone special, ever think of that?”
You coo, reaching out to pinch his cheek, and Dazai gives you a look nothing short of affronted, pulling his face away just as you feel how warm his cheeks are. 
“Tell me about your dream woman then, Dazai?” You lean your elbow against the back of the couch, resting your cheek on your palm as you look at him. “I wanna know allll about her.”
“Well-” Dazai starts, clearing his throat as he takes another sip of his drink. 
You watch as he stares ahead for a moment, waiting to see what he says—a part of you is genuinely curious, a tight feeling of anticipation in your throat that you can’t seem to push away but don’t know why.
Finally, Dazai looks at you with a crooked smirk and a victorious look in his eye that makes you realize whatever he is about to say is going to piss you off. “You would like to know, wouldn’t you? I knew you had a crush on me. I bet you just want to know if you’re my dream woman.”
“HA!” you bark out a laugh immediately at the prospect, ignoring the weird tug at your chest. “You wish, Dazai, maybe when hell freezes over.”
You miss the way Dazai’s expression falters as you try to distract yourself from the tightness pulling at you by taking another generous sip from your half-full glass.
Dazai lets out an irritable puff, pushing out his cheeks as he looks away from you, making a show of being offended by your comment. You roll your eyes at him as you turn your attention back to him.
“So you’ve both had your first kiss then,” he says, voice clipped, and before you can make a comment about it, he continues, “Whatever. It’s probably not that great anyway. It’s just pushing your lips against someone else’s. What’s so special about that? Honestly, it sounds kind of gross.”
He’s not looking at you, and you have to gnaw at your bottom lip to not snort at the blatant bitterness in his tone as he speaks. You wonder if he’s that aggrieved by the situation, or if the alcohol is just making him looser with his emotions because he’d never usually be so openly bothered by this.
“Why haven’t you kissed one of Mishima’s daughters?” you ask curiously, tucking your knees to your chest as you watch him curiously. “Those three are always hanging around trying to get our attention.”
That’s putting it gently—Mishima’s girls are your age, and whenever the Sun and Steel host an event that the Port Mafia is invited to, the three are all over you guys. Whether it’s teenage rebellion against their father, or they’re actually interested in you, you don’t really know, but they make for better company than most of the other people in attendance and have loose lips, so you tend to find the oldest sister to entertain you for the night.
Dazai hesitates for a moment, an odd expression crossing his face. He finally says, “They’re not interested in me.”
You wrinkle your nose as you look at him, leaning your head against the back of the couch. “What do you mean? The youngest is interested in anything with two legs, pretty low bar to reach,” you try to joke but Dazai seems to find no humor in it, lips curling down as he stares ahead absently.
“Not me,” Dazai says after a few seconds. “... They think I’m weird. Heard them talking about it at the last event—Noriko and Michiko.”
You pause, lowering your glass from your lips to rest your hands down in your lap as you observe him. His expression is mostly blank, but there’s a conflicted look in his eye that makes your throat feel tight. You’d always wondered if Dazai cared about what people would say about him—they’re not exactly subtle regarding how they feel about the youngest executive. They find him odd and disturbing, most people evade him as much as possible. They think he’s inhuman, closer to a demon than man. You’re sure he’s overheard a lot of it: Dazai knows anything and everything that goes on in the Port Mafia, you can’t imagine he’s blind to people’s opinions on him, but if he is aware, he’s never let it outwardly bother him. In fact, you think he’s utilized it to his advantage for the most part.  
But… you’d learned quickly once you were back in Yokohama that Dazai Osamu isn’t alone by choice. He craves interaction with people, but finds little of it because people find his presence unnerving and the few that don’t are wary of the tight leash that Mori has him on. So, you suppose you shouldn’t really be surprised that he’s more bothered than he lets on about some girls your age, who are clearly hung up on both you and Chuuya, having no interest in him because of how they perceive him.
“Well, fuck them,” you finally scoff, already plotting out a way to humiliate the two that Dazai had overheard talking shit about him at the upcoming event in a few weeks. “They’re bitches anyway. And stupid too, clearly. You’re not weird.”
Dazai looks as if he doesn’t believe you, lips tight as he lifts his glass to his lips only to find it empty. He seeks out the bottle and sighs when he notices that it too is empty. He places his glass back down on the table, but doesn’t turn to look at you.
“You don’t need to lie,” he says, keeping his voice breezy but you can see the expression on his face even if he is trying to hide it from you. “I know that I am, I-”
“You’re not,” you repeat, getting increasingly more irritated. “Don’t piss me off. Stop saying that shit.”
“It’s the truth,” Dazai says simply, folding his hands over his lap. “I don’t know why you’re getting so upset about it. Even Chuuya thinks so.”
“It’s not the truth,” you snap, “and I’m getting upset about it because you’re my best friend. I’m sick of people acting like you’re some evil incarnate for doing what we all do. And I’m sick of you letting it feed into whatever complex you have about your humanity. And for your information, Chuuya has drop-kicked people for talking poorly about you—and you better not tell him I told you that, he said he’d kill me if I did.”
Dazai doesn’t react to what you say for a second, brows furrowing and a strange expression crossing over his face at your words, as if he wasn’t sure what he expected from you but it wasn’t that. But it’s the truth. 
Chuuya has beat the shit out of people for talking badly about Dazai—no matter how much he bitches and complains that Dazai is annoying and a freak, he doesn’t let other people say the same shit when he’s around. You don’t like getting your own hands dirty like Chuuya does, but you’ve had people killed for talking badly about Dazai—you won’t admit that to anyone even if there’s a gun to your head—but all it takes is a few words about a certain subordinate stirring dissent within the ranks and the Black Lizards are on the move to take care of the inciter. 
It’s safe to say that the Mafia subordinates are careful to not voice their opinions about Dazai around the two of you anymore. 
Then, he says firmly, “I’m not your best friend.”
Your eye twitches. “What?” 
“I’m not your best friend,” he says again, speaking in a calm, matter-of-fact tone. “Chuuya is your best friend. You hang out with him more than me, you go drinking with him and don’t drink with me unless I bribe you, you kiss him.”
“Why can’t you both be my best friend?” you ask, annoyed, feeling much like a child.
“That defeats the purpose of best,” Dazai says snidely. You roll your eyes at his tone. 
“Well, I only hang out with Chuuya more because you’re on missions more than both of us because you have that fancy executive title now. And I don’t go drinking with Chuuya. I drank with him once and never again.”
You pointedly don’t say anything about the last comment he made, but Dazai catches that, leveling a steady look onto you.
“You kiss Chuuya,” Dazai repeats, quieter this time. “You don’t kiss me.”
“I would kiss you,” you tell him, voice a little more hesitant than you intend for it to be. Nervous, even. 
This is different from when you kiss Chuuya—from when you do anything with Chuuya. Kouyou directed the two of you to each other a few weeks ago toward the end of the conflict, saying that if you ever plan to bring any of the tactics taught by your mentors about utilizing your bodies for strategic purposes to the field, it’s best for the two of you to practice with one another as training. 
It was work. 
It was training. 
It wasn’t whatever this is about to be.
Your heartbeat feels erratic in your chest as you stare at him, he hasn’t reacted to your words, staring at you as if trying to figure out if you’re being serious or if you’re setting him up to make a fool out of himself.
“… I would not mind if hime was my first kiss.”
You let out a flustered noise in the back of your throat at the sudden use of the title you’ve grown to loathe over the past two years, dubbed by none other than Mori himself. Usually, Dazai only uses it whenever he’s trying to goad you into an argument, knowing how much you hate it, but there’s something different about it this time—something that has your cheeks heating up. His voice is softer, breath a bit hitched as he speaks, as if he’s just as nervous as you are but is trying to hide it.
“I thought you were saving it for someone special,” you say quietly, looking at Dazai carefully.
Dazai finally turns his head to look at you, expression subdued. “... Hime is special to me.”
Your breath catches at the admission, wondering if he’s trying to say you’re special because you’re his closest friend or if he’s trying to hint at something more, but Dazai’s expression doesn’t betray any of his thoughts and he doesn't seem inclined to expand on his painfully cryptic comment. 
Nor do you have the courage to ask.
You take in a quick breath, gathering your nerves before Dazai takes your prolonged silence as rejection and flees. You shift closer to him, watching as he takes in a sharp, quiet puff of air, staring at you carefully. His fingers are stiff in his lap, twitching as if he doesn’t know what to do with them. You lift your own hands to cup his cheeks between them.
His bandages are rough against the pads of the fingers on your left hand, and absently, you think that you should maybe stock up on a softer brand, because you’re sure they must be irritating his skin. His skin is smooth in contrast as the fingers of your other hand brush along his cheekbone, you watch as he lets out a shaky breath, visible eye wide as it traces your face. He instinctively leans into your touch and for a moment, you can’t help but wonder when the last time someone has touched him gently. Even Chuuya didn’t have such a reflexive reaction to your touch.
You don’t kiss him for a second, gaze lingering on his face, searching his eye to make sure that he’s ready. His tongue darts out to nervously wet his lips, cheeks tinted pink, fingers still unsteady in his lap as he waits. It’s cute, you think—and it might be the first and last time you’ll ever see Dazai Osamu so plainly flustered over something, so you want to savor it as best you can.
Once you’re satisfied, you lean in to press your lips against his. His lips are chapped and taste like the champagne the two of you have been drinking and faintly like the cigarette he’d been smoking on the walk back to your apartment. Not the most pleasant taste, but for some reason, you can’t seem to get enough of it. 
As far as kisses go, it's definitely a bit awkward, but still, it’s nicer than kissing Chuuya. You tell yourself it’s because kissing Chuuya is like any other job or mission, but a part of you wonders if it might be more than that.
You disregard that thought instantly. 
You keep the kiss soft and chaste, lips moving only subtly against his own. Dazai doesn’t kiss you back—you can feel his lips trembling and you try to relax him by smoothing your thumb over his cheekbone, but it only seems to make him even more nervous from how his breath hitches against your lips.
You can’t help the smile that tugs to the corner of your lips and he can obviously feel it, so he pulls back and asks, “Are you about to laugh at me again?” His voice is edged with a whine, lips turned down and expression sullen.
You don’t respond, instead, you lean in to press another quick kiss against his lips, letting out a puff of amusement when he lets out a surprised noise but swiftly melts into it.
Then you press another, and another after that, and again, until you can feel his own lips curving up against yours. You don’t know how long the two of you sit there, sharing short, chaste kisses and giggles until you can hardly remember how the two of you ended up there. You blame the dizziness you feel and the way your heart flutters in your chest on the alcohol.
When you finally pull away, Dazai’s face is flushed. He tries to hide the way his fingers are shaking by sneaking his hands beneath his thighs to sit on them, attempting to save some face by raising his chin and giving you an arrogant look.
“I knew you had a crush on me.”
“Ugh! I do not, you’re so gross, Dazai.”
But even as you speak the words out loud, you know that it’s a shameless lie. 
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Overblot Universe (3) | Yandere Twisted Wonderland
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Part 1 • 2
You could feel the urge to sleep pulling at your eyes
Faint voices sounding muddled had you fighting a little 
As you found your eyes drooping once again you could feel something wrap around your arms
Naturally you pull away, reminding you of those inky tentacles that held you captive a short while ago
You pause when you hear the sound of vines snapping
These weren’t tentacles
But vines 
Feeling the circumference of the vine you searched for thorns
Finding that they felt shaved and dulled
The detail brought a strange sense of comfort 
The kind you had when you were with your dear horned friend 
You follow their pull realizing the vines had come from an oval source of light
Blocking your eyes, you could finally make out where the light was coming from
The comforting green light shed through giant leaves that were covering the sun
It looked like you were back in Night Raven’s Botanical garden
Though it looked incredibly over grown 
“(Y/n) there you are! Where’d you go? My tummy’s going to kill me!”
The pitchy voice had you perking up, your eyes watering as you recognized the little fur ball running to you
“Grim!”
“Wah! What is the meaning of this Hench human!”
You couldn’t help the tears that dripped into his grey fur
“I missed you so much!”
“Heh?! Why would you miss me? You been sleepin’ in here the whole time.”
“Have I?”
Just then you realized the encounters with the overblot versions of the dorm leaders were incredibly fuzzy 
Like bad dreams
Giving Grim one last squeeze before releasing him you inhaled knowing that was all it was
Just bad dreams
“Grim, I thought you were hungry enough to wake them up quickly?”
“I was! But suddenly they just grabbed me and started to talking nonsense!”
The vice dorm leader shook his head before smiling at you and holding his hand out to you
“Glad to see you’re awake enough to make your appointment!”
“What do you mean Jamil?”
He smiled pulling you up and into his side 
Holding you incredibly close as he walked into the overgrown expanse of the vegetation
Jamil looked heavenly under the shaded natural light
He looked so happy
Something in you told you not to ask about Kalim
Before you could question him more he pulls back a particularly large leaf to reveal something lovely
A picnic with a number of dishes that made your mouth water and sitting wistfully beside them was none other than–
“Tsunotaro!?”
“Child of Man, I’m glad that you’re here to join us!”
Grim ran past you to get to the food you let Jamil intertwine his fingers with yours as he led you to the blanket
In no time at all you were eating and chatting 
The ghosts of inky hands and tentacles leaving your mind every now and then as you spoke more and more with your friends
Sometimes the thought of how weird this pair up was but you had to pay attention Malleus was spoon feeding something to you
And even when the food was all gone and Grim was napping on your stomach 
All that existed of the nightmare before was the faint memory of ink which was constantly overshadowed by Jamil and Malleus 
“That’s what I’m saying: these clouds look like a bat!”
“I disagree. A Briar Valley bat is much larger than a fruit bat…and their tails are much larger.”
“But they’re still classified as a bat right?”
“Technically.”
“See? (Y/n), please help him understand.”
It’s nice….to relax like this 
“Hey uh how long have I been sleeping?”
“Not long I am sure. You left shortly after our breakfast together and Grim claimed you went on your own after that.”
“Really? That’s not how I remember it…”
“Oh Really? What do you remember?”
That fuzzy feeling was there again 
you can feel your head ache while you tried to make the image in your head clearer
But alas it never did
“Nothing. Anyway let’s just go back to our special day!”
“Yes, let’s. You both have promised to indulge in our mini-gargoyle-making session.”
As promised all three of you separated a large block of clay that you weren’t aware that they brought
Beginining to shape mini gargoyles with it 
It was hard using the utensils Malleus seems to have bought
But they were great
It was all going great
Until you heard Jamil whimper
Looking up you hadn’t expected what you were seeing
Watching as Jamil’s figure faded like an image on a screen
Phasing in an out the clay falling from his fingers as it continued
“Jamil! Are you okay what’s wrong?”
“Do not tell me…” 
Looking over at Tsunotarou, his face was twisted and his eyes were glaring at the flickering Jamil 
But it didn’t seem that he was directing that hatred at him but someone else
“Jamil if I release you can you stop him?”
“Him?”
“I-I’m not sure I can’t feel the others–ack!”
Jamil belted out another round of coughing 
“Jamil, Malleus what is going on!?”
Malleus’ glare was now directed at you 
Taking his real name leaving your lips as an insult in and of itself
“(Y/n), I think it’s best you go back to sleep.”
The second the word left his mouth you felt a weight on all your muscles
Pulling at your eyelids and even your consciousness
But you fought back 
Backing away from the fae who was now worriedly reaching out for you
Instead you ended up closer to Jamil trying to grab onto his flickering form
“(Y—-Y—/n-n-n-)! P-lease!”
His form continued to flicker out of existence allowing you to see the familiar image of the Overblotted Jamil
“Viper make them sleep. I will come to your aid next. I just need you to make them sleep!”
The word had the same pull but you were getting used to it
Pushing through you watched the phasing Overblotted Jamil’s eyes light up as he tried to say something
Before he could he screamed out finally dissipating into nothingness
His disappearance revealed something more to you 
The green paradise you’d been in began to melt away churning and piling into mounds of ink 
Ink that you found yourself sinking into
“(Y/n)!!!”
Malleus’ layered voice was screeching and the world was shaking
But that wasn’t stopping your quick descent and sooner than you could react your vision was engulfed in blackness
The feeling of your heart being pulled out of something deep was what met you when you found you could open your eyes once again
“There you should be free of that creatures curse. Now my King we’ve much to catch up on.”
Part 4?
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