#i feel more confident in the kindness & love of those who choose to forgive me for my struggles

[nanomooselet]

My Brother's Keeper (I)

So, uh, I have seen the complaints that Stampede is "poorly-written". Often enough, really, to get... somewhat overly bent out of shape about it. Stampede was my entry into the story and I may have mentioned once or twice that I like it. You know. Just a little. This is not to say it's without its flaws, but it's technically very skilful, at least to my eyes. It's just… skilful in roughly twenty-two minute chunks, so it crams a whole lot into those chunks.

Vash tells Wolfwood he can "see [kindness] in his eyes" half an hour tops after hitting him with a truck. It's assumed that they're relying on previous characterisation of the two to carry this beat.

They're not.

See, animated shows or films (and definitely in the case of Stampede) aren't only written. They're story-boarded, rendered, scored etc. and all the parts interlock with the other parts. It has to be taken as a whole: spoken, written, visual, musical, situational, compositional. These are twelve instalments of a single story where everything in it develops, comments on, or reflects what lies at the work's thematic heart, but you have to figure out how. It's not going to explain it to you. If the relationship between two characters appears strange, that's because there's more to it. And whenever you see something in it that visually echoes something else in it, get out your pasteboard and stick in two thumbtacks connected with string because the show's letting you know it's important.

Now, because I viewed Stampede first, my reaction to this part was very much like Wolfwood's ("???") but the more of the show I watched, the more sense it started to make, and the more I appreciated what it did for Vash's characterisation. Having since read the manga, in my opinion the boys aren't at all interacting like they're accessing past-life memories. Vash is too busy silently reeling over Jeneora Rock and dreading his confrontation with Knives to keep up the whacky act that the older WW pierced. Wolfwood is too young and trapped by his own hurt to empathise by seeing through Vash's false smiles.

There's something else going on with these two, and if you think carefully, it's clear what it is. There were two loved ones that Vash lost tragically early in life, and we can assume it's not Rem he's thinking of.* The heart of this series is "the song of the brothers."

Whose side are you on?

I have to choose.

Lo and behold, through that lens the character interaction made a whole lot more sense. And I want to talk about how.

So, according to the show's language, right from his very first appearance Wolfwood has a connection with Knives.

In the ensuing scenes/episodes, it was then clear to me that Wolfwood isn't just connected to Vash's brother. He's a representative, serving as a sort of understudy while Vash journeys to confront the real thing. Anything and everything Wolfwood does or says is with that role in mind, because he's either playing along or fighting against it. It dictates his development as the show unfolds. He's got a job and he'll do it, but which of the twins' agendas is he ultimately serving as he does? Even he can't yet be sure.

This is a significant change. It has a huge effect on Wolfwood's characterisation; it's why he comes across as less confident, more surly - he's rebellious, but conflicted and immature. In the manga, the first time we meet Nick he's (mostly) his own man and he (mostly) makes his own decisions. While he isn't honest about his agenda, he is trying to temper Vash's idealism for honest and well-meaning reasons, albeit in a bitchy way. When he reveals himself, throwing down the coin halves, you feel the man is protesting too much so it'll make what's coming easier on Vash. Despite how deeply the two came to love each other they couldn't communicate their forgiveness, but Wolfwood is at his core a good man first who lost his way, then finds it again in Vash. **

Again by contrast in Stampede, Nick's identity isn't his own to shape (yet). He standing in for Knives, and he doesn't much like it. He does know more about the actual shape of things than the reporters - for instance, he doesn't bat an eyelash when Brad mentioned how long they've known Vash. So he can readily talk with Vash and test his convictions. They basically both know each other's biggest secrets already, so they don't have to make a whole production of getting to know each other.

But standing in for Knives is also why the introductory aw-look-he's-nice-really scene is so quickly revealed to be staged. Knives is the primary antagonist, not a neutral agent - he's the most dangerous and personal opponent the protagonists face. He's also cruel, controlling and manipulative. His "help" is anything but. Any gift he seems to freely give, like a protector, will either extract an awful cost down the line or have some hidden purpose (if he isn't "solving" a problem he himself created). Approach with caution.

(You know how Nick did something no one asked him to do then hit Vash, Meryl and Roberto with a massive bill for it like a dick? You know how he then violently rescued them from a situation he himself engineered so they'd have gratitude? Those are Knives's most basic manipulation tactics, when he isn't just hurling verbal abuse: I help you/I love you so I'm entitled to take this from/do this to you. Wolfwood is causing problems on purpose by acting out because it's funny, and knows he won't get whatever he's demanding. Knives thinks he's helping, and rarely hears when he's told "no".

Also, both the English and the Japanese have Roberto calling Wolfwood someone who kills with a smile on his face. He doesn't, really, but we have met someone else who does.)

That means like every other character, Wolfwood isn't quite himself. Not yet.

And that's actually awesome. Because it speaks to who the other characters are - specifically, about Vash.

(Part II)

(Part III)

(Part IV)

(Part V)

(Part VI)

(Part VII)

* OR COULD IT BE, as inevitably assumed on tumblr when two men are in proximity, unspoken romantic desire????

I'm not saying it can't be a factor, but it doesn't explain why they start having discussions over their principles like they've known each other for years. Or at least, to me it doesn't. As I've said I don't ship them. If you disagree, it's totally fine! Hear me out and decide for yourself. There's no reason to believe both can't be true.

** By what's coming, I mean the same development that eventually comes to every iteration of Wolfwood. You know the one. And by "they loved each other" I don't mean necessarily mean romantically. My personal belief is that there were mutual feelings along those lines, but they're both too emotionally reticent to acknowledge them and might not have regardless. But that's just me!

#trigun stampede #trigun meta #vash the stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #millions knives #not sure when to add the next part #there are at least three more. maybe four. help it's so long #day? two days? #tristampparty #meta: my brother's keeper

[nep2unes]

❝  a letter from a version of yourself that you need right now ❞  FT.  STUDIO GHIBLI MASTERPIECES

𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘥𝘦𝘴 : channeled letter from either a past or future version of yourself, channeled song, things of significance 

𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘳 : take what resonates and ignore what doesn’t. remember your intuition is quiet, peaceful, and self-doubt free! take a deep breath and do not overthink when choosing a pile, the first picture your eyes land on is usually the pile is for you. ALSO, remember that you possess the privilege of freewill so whether the things that i channel below happen or not, depends on you. there are infinite amounts of possibilities and you are in control of your fate. i am simply here to read the current energy!

𝘱 𝘪 𝘭 𝘦  𝘰 𝘯 𝘦  : 

╭┈┈┈┈╮

to: current you

from: a heartbroken version of yourself

╰┈┈┈┈╯

𝒹𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝓂𝓎 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒,

it wasn’t your fault. stop blaming yourself for this. you have to understand that what that person did to you had nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. stop blaming yourself and free yourself from the chains of resentment. forgive them and let them go. you’ve been thinking of them and what they did to you lately right? maybe dreaming of them? don’t be afraid of reliving the moment. relive the moment but do not judge yourself for how you feel about it. instead, feel the emotions and then peacefully let them go. your emotions do not have to consume you. please understand that the choices and decisions i made were all based on the knowledge i had at that time. i couldn’t see the red flags. but that was the whole point. i had to go through this to learn how to see them! stop being ashamed of me. without me you wouldn’t be the person you are now. you’re so much more smarter and in tune with yourself now! my chaos led to your growth and you rose beautifully from the ashes like a phoenix. to let go of the grudge, you have to address that it’s there. so accept me, forgive me, and let me go. you can only do the same for that person if you do this for yourself first. it’s time. you’re entering this new chapter where you’ll be meeting kind-hearted people who genuinely have your best interest at heart but to recognize them you have to face your past demons and most importantly, you have to face me. i want to congratulate you with how far you’ve come! know that you are strong enough, smart enough, and beautiful enough. you can conquer anything that comes your way because you are such a strong being. you’re strong as hell, acknowledge it now and forever! 

𝓈𝒾𝓃𝒸𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓁𝓎, 

𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓅𝒶𝓈𝓉

✧ 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 : heart locket, breakup, dark room, 444, betrayal, deceit, keys, orange peel, discombobulated?, afraid of facing past, sexual trauma, empathy towards yourself, dreams, sesame street, 

✧ 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 : godspeed by frank ocean

❝  i let go of my claim on you, it’s a free world ❞❞

𝘱 𝘪 𝘭 𝘦  𝘵 𝘸 𝘰 :

╭┈┈┈┈╮

to: current you

from: a future, successful version of yourself 

╰┈┈┈┈╯

𝒹𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝓀𝒾𝒹,

why are you so scared of becoming me huh? you know, i got a little bone to pick with you. you got me damn near fed up with how you’re talking to yourself right now. you know that i’m inevitable right? you can tell yourself you’ll never be me all you want but know that doesn’t actually stop me because i already exist in some other reality. really you’re just prolonging yourself from becoming me or should i say “unlocking” me. we’re not separate beings. we’re one! you’re already successful. you already love yourself. you’re already confident.   You just got to believe it. first, you need not be afraid of tapping into me. most importantly, don’t be afraid of what others will say when you tap into me. fuck what everyone else has to say. you know how I got here? by letting bygones be bygones and not letting others’ opinion of me sway how i move in the world. that’s how i got my peace of mind. i said fuck you to those intrusive thoughts, self limiting beliefs, and anything that ever made me question my identity and soul purpose. you already know your purpose. your ego is trying to tell you that you don’t but you do. trust me when i say this that all there’s left to do is to, well, do! you are limitless. you’re such a good ass manifestor. shit, that’s another reason i’m in this position right now. that and most importantly, my consistency and patience! listen, i’m not telling you that it’s easy or it’s a linear journey. even i still have off days. i doubt myself every now and then but the whole point is to know that your thoughts aren’t necessarily the truth and you can choose to change them. you can change your way of thinking in an instant if you wanted to do. be delusional if you have to. at the end of the day, you are the only person in your way. so get the fuck out your way and boss up. be a leader. it’s you vs. you, which means the only outcome is to win! be confident in yourself because you’re way more powerful than you think. we are one. i’m literally within you. remember that always, especially when it gets difficult. oh! make sure to do some self-confidence affirmations and some solar plexus meditations. i found that incorporating this into my routines daily has really aided me in my path and still aids me now. anyways, you’re gonna be good. everything’s going to be fine. it may not seem like that but you got a bright future, kid. now get your ass up out of bed and connect with me! 

𝓈𝒾𝓃𝒸𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓁𝓎,

𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒻𝓊𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒

✧ 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 : 17, 15, 111, 222, sag placements, doubt, ludacris?, angel, catastrophe, regina george, columbus, blocked solar plexus, confidence issues, imposter syndrome, lack of motivation, the letter s, feeling stagnant, exhaustion

✧ 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 : massa by tyler the creator

❝  whatever brings you immense joy, do that, that’s your luxury. ❞

𝘱 𝘪 𝘭 𝘦  𝘵 𝘩 𝘳 𝘦 𝘦 :

╭┈┈┈┈╮

to: current you

from: your inner child 

╰┈┈┈┈╯

𝒹𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝒷𝓊𝒹𝒹𝓎, 

can we have a little bit of fun? for once? i want to play with you, see new things,  i want to go outside. i don’t like being cooped up between four walls. it makes me feel so much more lonely. i definitely don’t like to work all the time without breaks either! when can we actually have fun? remember when we used to paint and write and do all those arts and crafts projects! man, that was my favorite. why won’t you let me play? why don’t you listen to me when i’m scared? i just want to be comforted. i just you to accept me and give me a safe space to be myself. i want to dance crazily in the rain! i want to do all the fun stuff i see in the movies. i feel so lonely at times. it’s like if i was locked inside a dark, cold room. i think i have superpowers. i can see and feel people and things that not everyone can see or feel! mom and dad told me that it's just a phase and that when i grow older it won’t be there anymore. it’s so weird and i don’t quite understand it but i think it’s pretty cool. do you still have superpowers? i hope you do because i like being a superhero and helping others. it makes me feel so unique and sometimes i use it to help me do and decide things. i have an idea! you should use it too! i know you have been stressing over that choice/decision you need to make. use your superpowers to help you decide and not feel so stuck. sometimes when i sit down quietly outside is when my superpowers are the strongest. i love to be outside. it makes me feel so good, plus i love to look at the different animals like the squirrels and ladybugs! i hope you know that i look up to you. you are everything i wanted to be. you’re so strong and independent. you’re just so flipping cool! i wish you would show people your super cool side. i just know they’d like you sooooo much and you’d be have so many friends. i never had much friends but i bet you if i was you and knew everything you knew, i would’ve had a ton. please pay attention to me more! you’re the only person that understands me. i really like talking and spending time with you. be safe. love you. 

𝓈𝒾𝓃𝒸𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓁𝓎,

𝓁𝒾𝓉𝓉𝓁𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊

✧ 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 : 404, 101, imaginary friends, animals, rainbow loom, friendship bracelets, mandarins, nature, touch grass, cher, 70′s era, curiosity, venus dominant, loneliness, burnt out, grounding work, inner child work, let loose, rest, crown chakra upgrades/activation

✧ 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 : dreams by fleetwood mac

❝  it’s only right that you should play the way you feel it ❞

𝘱 𝘪 𝘭 𝘦  𝘧 𝘰 𝘶 𝘳  :

╭┈┈┈┈╮

to: current you

from: an ‘addicted’ version of yourself

╰┈┈┈┈╯

𝒹𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓊𝓉𝒾𝒻𝓊𝓁 𝓈𝑜𝓊𝓁,

why are you still letting that toxic relationship define your value? that person really fucked us up huh? it’s okay to cry it out. let it all out. fuck what everyone else says about “moving on.” a relationship that intense and chaotic could never be forgotten. and it shouldn't! it shouldn't be forgotten because now you know what to look out for. you have learned to identify the red flags i couldn’t. because of this, history can never repeat itself. that person violated my boundaries, told me ugly shit about my physical and inner self, and controlled me. it’s okay to not have sympathy for them. however, learn to accept this and forgive me for being so stuck. once you forgive me, only then you can forgive them. you have to understand that i was in such a vulnerable state back then that i was so blinded by the fact that someone was taking advantage of me. it fucked me over because i gave and gave until i didn’t have left for myself. let me say, you are NOT what they said you are. you are only what YOU say you are. point blank. they say the greatest addiction is hardcore drugs but i’d say it’s people. i was so addicted to that person, i couldn’t bring myself to leave and i took in the love i thought i deserved. once you took the step for me and actually left, it was so freeing. you dug us up out of that hole. you saved us. no one else can say they did that for us. you were the one that did and that takes balls. you know, i always knew you were a warrior. it crossed my mind all the time but i couldn’t bring myself to believe it and for that i am sorry. i am sorry that i let us get so far into the deep end in the hands of another. i am sorry that i put my self worth in the hands of another. i’m gonna be honest, it seems like constantly hearing all self-deprecation and negativity from them all that time has impacted you more than you know. you’re in recovery mode right now, believe it or not, so be patient with yourself. journal everything you feel! every time a self-deprecating thought comes through, simply observe it and let it pass. then replace it with something positive about yourself. you deserve the entire universe so act like it! hang tight ‘cause a little birdie told me that you got someone new coming your way... and this one’s a good one. don’t let my insecurities and over-protectiveness fuck it up. remind me to not be so protective and that it’s safe to let our walls down. the worst is over. it’s only up from here. you’ve been through hell and back and you’re still that bitch. don’t let anyone take that away from you or tell you otherwise ever again! 

𝓈𝒾𝓃𝒸𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓁𝓎,

𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓅𝒶𝓈𝓉

✧ 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 : purple, 2′s, 3′s, 44 mins, jhene aiko’s souled out album, “you have have gotta lose your mind just to find your peace of mind”, narcissistic people, heart chakra, sacral chakra, toxic relationships, damaged self-worth, putting up a mask, forceful smiles, glass slipper, mac miller, cinderella, cats, tacos, west coast, cube, math, reverence?, shameless 

✧ 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 : who you are by jessie j 

(highly recommend hearing the full song! lovely message in there, especially for this pile)

❝  tears don’t mean you’re losing, everybody's bruising ❞

𝙃𝙊𝙋𝙀 𝙔𝙊𝙐 𝙀𝙉𝙅𝙊𝙔𝙀𝘿 𝙔𝙊𝙐𝙍 𝙎𝙏𝘼𝙔. 𝘿𝙊𝙉’𝙏 𝙁𝙊𝙍𝙂𝙀𝙏 𝙏𝙊 𝘾𝙇𝙊𝙎𝙀 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙏𝘼𝘽. 𝙁𝙀𝙀𝘿𝘽𝘼𝘾𝙆 𝙄𝙎 𝙃𝙄𝙂𝙃𝙇𝙔 𝙁𝘼𝙑𝙊𝙍𝙀𝘿!  xo

#this needed to be dropped already so here #pac. #pick a card #pick a pile tarot #pick a card tarot #tarot #pick a pile #free tarot #psychic readings #tarot readings #psychic medium #pac #pac tarot

[adviceformefromme]

Hi hon, I've always loved your blog and advice—and I'd love to have your guidance and thoughts on my issue.

I carry a lot of guilt and shame over making a terrible mistake 5 years ago, which led to the fall of my longest childhood friendship (16yrs at that point). I thought I was able to accept it, but I still have dreams about my friend that reopens the grief I have for our friendship. Today's dream was probably the worst; it featured them being willing to mend our relationship, us interacting like normal, planning to get matching piercings together, and it felt so real, I was so happy.

I came across their social media acc while taking off followers from a personal art account I hope to invest in this year. I was rly tempted to check on their ig reels and YouTube, but knew I shouldn't and decided not to in the end. If me no longer being in their life makes them able to live their happiest and most fulfilling life, I want that for them, I want to be happy for them. Even if it does hurt/make me sad. It wasn't a perfect friendship, but they were my best friend. I want to heal from this as much as possible, since healing completely is prob unrealistic.

I have a group of close friends, ppl who are much more communicative w me, but we all live far from each other so we only interact digitally. I've moved so many times in my life, that digitally is also the best way for me to keep in touch w any irl old friends—it's hard to keep irl friendships strong when you don't see them in person as much as you could in the past.

Tbh I'm kind of a loser. I'm jobless w/ no degree & don't have a driver's license. I know my lack of motivation to get my life together contributes to the lack of opportunities in seeing my friends in person. I am so comfortable in my home environment, even if emotionally/mentally abusive and fear change even if I know it's good for me. I have dreams and yet I'm scared to make steps towards them. That's a whole other thing tho.

I don't know what I need to move past this mourning. I want to stop carrying this sadness with me. I feel it bear such a heavy weight in my chest. I'm at fault and to blame and i feel terrible for being a bad person/friend to that person, even if I know I'm a better/good friend to the ppl currently in my life. Please help me.

Hey sweetie, I sense so much sadness in your message from how you describe your life, to your loss with your friend. I would recommend journalling or releasing your emotions through some form of expression. It needs to be expressed. Write, cry, paint do what ever you need to do to release these emotions because it seems they are completely weighing you down and hacking away at your self esteem. Writing your friend a letter did come to mind if you really want to let them know how you feel and if it would shift some of the pain you've been feeling. I can't recommend forgiveness healing enough! I've wrote about the process here. The journey to loving yourself and being kind to yourself is a process, especially if you are going from a place of feeling low confidence and self belief. But please don't give up on your hopes and dreams. They are within you for a reason. You are not a bad person, you are human and we all do things we wish we didn't, all we can do is show up better. Do our best each day. Listen to those positive affirmations instead of the music that brings you down. Choose the foods that give you energy, instead of foods that give you the food comma so you actually feel motivated to do your best. Read a book that inspires you, watch a documentary about struggle to success. Go help someone. Do a random act of kindness. Plan your tomorrow. Choose to wear something that makes you feel special. Brush your teeth before bed. Light an incense stick. There are so many little things you can do each day to add some light and love into your existence. Lean into the goodness and I promise the heavy weights of the world will start to shift. You'll start to feel a little lighter day by day. But it will be worth it. The light is within you, keep tending to your fire.

xoxox

#levelup #manifestyourreality #manifesting #lawofattraction #levelupjourney #growthmindset #levelup confidence lawofattraction powerofthemind #manifest #manifestingmindset

[the-kittylorian-writes]

"We Are Eternal"

Rating: General Audiences Type: One-shot Word count: 1k+

Summary:

Paz Vizsla leaves a message to his son Ragnar via holo-recording before he joins the reconnaissance team to scout Mandalore. If that were to be his last stand, no words will be left unsaid.

Epistolary in Paz's POV (aka it is in letter form).

Spoilers for s03ep07 or Chapter 23 - “The Spies” 

Read on AO3 or here:

"We Are Eternal"

*****

My son, Ragnar—

When this message reaches you, little one, know that I am already dead. Don’t despair. 

But you will feel the despair anyway. You will feel doubt, you will feel great sadness and fear, and worst of all, you will feel unloved. Abandoned. You are allowed to feel all that, my little one. Allow yourself to feel the rage, the grief, the immense sadness—but never linger in those intense emotions. When the time is right, you will know that you need let go.

I do not expect you to understand right away, and neither does the Tribe—all those who have come to respect me as a warrior, and love you as my son and fellow young soldier. One day, you will understand what true sacrifice is. One day, you will understand why the greatest, most sublime way of showing my love to you is leaving you, as confusing as it sounds. But while I will no longer be with you where I can hold you, and you can hold me, tangible and real in body—so I will remain with you in spirit. As I make my journey to the Oversoul to join all the noble and brave Mandalorians who have gone before us, a huge part of me will remain in your heart’s memory. Even as you hear me now, in this piece of memory, one day you may even forget my voice. You may even forget my stance or the exact words of wisdom I tell you now; you may even come to resent me for a long time. 

I forgive you as I will never cease loving you from the length and breadth of the Oversoul.

I have chosen you as my son because you have what it takes to be a true warrior. You are a worthy Vizsla, Ragnar, as you are in your entirety a worthy Mandalorian. I know you are capable of resilience, of the grit that comes with the most challenging parts of life, of overcoming all tribulations which forge us into true children of Mandalore. You are still but a tender blade ready to be sharpened and doused in fire and water as the hammer falls on you again and again. That will always be the core of a Mandalorian’s life. 

I have chosen you not just for your great respect and awe of the Creed which you have sworn into, but because whether or not the time will come when you shall lift helm from your face so your bare eyes would see the sun again, you will always remain to serve the greatest honor and the greatest good. 

When you find yourself astray, follow your instincts. There could have been many more years where I could teach you to hone your skills, to see you grow up into a man who would keep his word, a man who sees through his mind’s eye rather than what is presented before him—a man of discernment, strength, and vision. Yet I am confident that I have left you with enough to take the next steps on your own, and most especially with the help and guidance of the Tribe. 

Ragnar, you are never alone. You may walk the steps in solitude if you seek it, but remember that the Tribe will always have your back, as one day you will be there for the Tribe, and pay the kindness forward. Only you can entrust yourself with that great purpose.

Remember what I have taught you about our canons of honor? Strength is life, for the strong have the right to rule. Honor is life, for with no honor one may as well be dead. Loyalty is life, for without one's clan one has no purpose. Death is life, one should die as they have lived.

My son, we were all born to die, but not only is that the most natural thing about life—is that if we are blessed with the choice on how we leave our earthly existence, we will choose our actions wisely, actions that would resonate through the centuries even after we have long gone. If we can, we will always choose a warrior’s death, but not to vainly tempt fate. We will make every breath in our bodies count as we give everything we have in service of the whole instead of self. When we choose how to die, it will be an act of selflessness. Do everything in your power to hold the line when the line is all that remains.

I have left you not because I do not love you. I am dead not because I couldn’t care less about you. You are the most precious thing that I would ever fight for, and whom I would readily die for. Know that my last thoughts will be of you, and of the greatness you and the Mandalorians have yet to achieve when we take our place among the open galaxy once again. 

Be fearless, Ragnar, although fear will overtake you more times than you will realize. Find strength in the Creed. They are words forever forged in your heart. Let every step you tread be inspired by the Way of the Mand’alor. The Tribe has taught you. I have taught you. I have great faith in you.

Farewell for now, my little one. As with all those who have departed before us, know that I am not gone; I am merely marching far away. Let it be many long years until you are by my side once more, marching along with me, and we will look each other in the eye in spirit as we have done so in life. We will say to each other that we have served our greatest purpose, and death took us because that greatest purpose has been fulfilled. That is how we become eternal.

I love you always, my young warrior. I have joined our ancestors as you will one day join them. Unfurl the banner of Clan Vizsla. Bear all joy and pain with honor, as we will all someday die with honor. That is my prayer for you and for all our brothers and sisters.

This is the Way.

Your father, Paz.

*****

Author's Notes:

I can't believe our beloved big blue warrior has passed. :'( Although many wish or believe that he could have survived, I say, let Paz have his warrior's death. As painful as it is, Paz deserved to go like a real hero (even if 'hero' doesn't exist in Mandalorian vocabulary as the lore says). Now the torch of Clan Vizsla is now in Ragnar's hands. ;_; Please pray for Ragnar. Lol ugly sobbing~

P.S. and edit: This epistolary fic is inspired by “death letters” written by soldiers who are regularly deployed on dangerous missions, so they write letters to their families just in case, in a pov as though they had already gone. Of course if they do survive, they either disregard or dispose of the letter or keep it until the next mission. Paz seems pretty hardcore from the beginning and he was most probably ready for anything especially a warrior’s death. 💔💙

*****

Read more stories on Clan Vizsla's own clan of two: Paz and Ragnar 💙:

"A Future Yet Unknown" (also on AO3)

"Only One Creed" (also on AO3)

"From The Ashes" (also on AO3)

"All The Little Foundlings" (also on AO3)

#the mandalorian fanfiction #the mandalorian season 3 #mando season 3 spoilers #star wars fanfics #star wars fanfiction #mando fanfic #the mandalorian #father and son relationship #clan vizsla #paz vizsla #ragnar vizsla #epistolary #grief and loss #foundlings are the future #my fics #my writing #more star wars orphans

[des-no9]

Philautia for the meme!

Sorry it took me so long to answer this but here we go :>

Questions taken from OC questions on the seven forms of love

Philautia – Vanquish and Self Love

Does your OC have a healthy sense of their own worth and value? Or do they see themselves as failing to live up to their original potential? Perhaps they are convinced of their own sinful or inadequate nature? Kind of... Much, much more than she used to. She's lived long enough to understand herself, her choices, actions, and their consequences. Very young after Caiphon chose her, she was always terrified of becoming her sister and what had happened to her. And she kind of in a way, did. But also got worse. I'm not sure if she really acknowledges that some of the things she's done in her life are much worse than the sins of her sister, nor can she yet put the blame of it on Nezarr who groomed and abused her for many years. She feels like much of it is just her nature. And she is right, in a way. A nature nurtured. Post BG3, she has a thousand complex views on her own self worth and value. She has confidence. Arrogance. And much of it is justified. But it won't cover those self doubts and her lacking of self worth when she realises she is now respoonsible for her own actions, desires, sins. And accepting that she doesn't necessarily want to repent for all she's done. As a side, I think this is another part of connection between her and Voss. Complex, morally grey babies who probably are more mellowed than they used to be, but why should they ever apologise or regret what they were, for look who they are now.

Does your OC believe that it is important to love themselves in the first instance? Perhaps in order to be able to give and receive love authentically? Or because they believe first and foremost in "looking after number one"? I don't think she believes that you must love yourself in order to receive or give love authentically. No. If she did, she probably never would love. Accpetance of who she is, and love for who she is, are two quite different things to Vanquish. And being truly loved despite being unable to wholly love yourself, being loved despite being broken, being loved and together understanding, unravelling, finding more worth in eachother - that's more important to Vanquish. However, love, the word, the feeling, the threat, the promise has blurred so many lines for her over her years. Sometimes unravelling it and understanding authentic love for her, is a journey in itself.

Does your OC judge themselves by the same standards as they apply to others? Or are they sometimes hypocritical in condemning others for faults they also possess? Or perhaps they find it easier to forgive others for things that they cannot abide in themselves? Vanquish judges others, absolutely. She can be hypocritical in her opinions, making them suit her. Judging others and herself differently to suit her. And on the flip, she definitely will forgive and forget others for things she wouldn't do herself. It's a very pick and choose situation for Vanquish.

Which of your OC's qualities makes them the most proud? Do they think more people should be like them in this regard? Or do they quite like being rare in possessing it? Being able to feel joy and laughter through her scars, trauma, pain, physical and mental. So I guess, her resilience and strength. Vanquish definitely thinks people should be more like her in this regard. She values overcoming adversity with strength, endurance. And can be unfairly harsh of those that struggle with it in ways she doesn't approve of or like.

Has your OC always had the same opinion of themselves or has this changed over time? Have they learned to love themselves - perhaps with the help of others - as their journey progressed? Or have the consequences of their actions only served to erode their sense of self-worth? Oh no it's definitely changed. Over her years with Nezarr he broke her down countless of times. Made, unmade her, to make her again. She's had to piece together her identity so many times over. Pulling parts from broken memories, a past self, making something that she wants to be, into who she is; pulling future to present. She is learning to love herself. She accepts herself and what she's become, maybe fondly remembering the many iterations of Vanquish over the hundreds of years that amalgam to who she is now. But beneath it all, her self worth has been eroded, because in the end, her self was eroded, over and over. Now, whoever this Vanquish is, she wants to love, finally free.

#tag: vanquish #tav: vanquish #about vanquish #ask des #des replies #otp: adilshar #thank you for asking love !!! i love talking about her so much

[serenanymph]

author ask tag game

tagged by @scribbling-stardust! you can find her post here. putting this whole thing under the cut because boy is it Long. as for the tag... uh whoever I've tagged below who wants to hop in ig (no pressure tho!!)

What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it? Honestly my themes kind of grow from the story instead of the other way around, but overall I'd say it's something along the lines of discrimination and how dangerous hate can be. (<< sounds cool, has no idea how she's going to actually write this) But I will say there's a lot of like - mini themes in it too, because each character has their own issues and needs to learn different things to grow. Stuff about communication, about self-care, about finding yourself, about courage, etc etc. Very scattered, ik.

What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)? I'd say there's a lot of like?? Mythological creatures?? Y'know the classics like vampires and werewolves and selkies and what not. And then I just. Turn it all on its head. All the myths of them still exist in-universe - they're just wildly inaccurate because humans have been passing the stories down for decades. In actuality, Beasts are much more different. (Also and this is rather embarrassing to admit, but I've been stealing aHeM taking inspiration for characters from all of the media I've been watching. Which is. Mostly anime. Plus some worldbuilding details from fanfic aus I've thought up.)

What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, help readers grow as a person? Honestly? I have no idea. As of now, he's mostly trying to survive. I think the issue with Crys is that largely he's not someone who actually has a goal he wants to achieve?? The growth he experiences is not a thing he really decides he wants, but more something he needs, which the narrative basically has to drag him into. As for me... mostly I just want to write my stories and have them reach someone somewhere. It's probably the same for a lot of us who share those stories.

How many chapters is your story going to have? No idea. 40-something?? 50??? I always underestimate my end wordcount and my chapters vary wildly in length.

Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it? Original content!! I've been thinking about tweaking some stuff in Crow Wings (book 1) after I've finished first drafting Witch's Book (book 2), then I'll probably throw it up on ao3 and maybe simultaneously post it here.

When and why did you start writing? Sometime when I was a kid I think?? I'm pretty sure I was vaguely upset and bored and then I just picked up a pencil and started going at it. It was titled 'Survival' and it was basically a ripoff of I Am Number Four, littered with grammar and spelling mistakes, and all the cringefail, mary sue tropes small me could think up. I kid you not, the main character was named Emma, she had blond hair and blue eyes, and she was so good at fighting she was better at it then boys, even. Gasp!! Color me surprised!!!!! Anyway I still have it with me due to nostalgia reasons but it is hidden in my drawer under my bed where the light of day will never reach. Don't judge me, I was like nine.

Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers of Tumblr do you follow? We're all friends here and we're all still learning, so don't be afraid to share your work!! Something you feel might not be "good enough" is a story someone out there will love - and take it from a person with low self-confidence, your writing's often not as bad as you think! :D (also c'mon. it can't be worse than what nine-year-old me thought up.) As for writers... well I am following a lot of people but I'm just gonna tag a few of my mutuals. There's @lyssa-ink (my first ever writeblr mutual!!! she does fantasy with a lot of immortals, fae and court politics), and also @reneesbooks (go check out lacuna. birdie is adorable and jack is so funny to me). Also @macabremoons (vampires. lots of vampires. also super fun to talk to!!!), @sidhewrites (love graveyard lesbians. kaz is an absolute disaster and lucy is just so!!!), and @loopyhoopywrites (the Ex-Quest is peak comedy. every excerpt I read leaves me wheezing). I don't talk as much with @space-writes, @e-klair, @sapphos-scientist or @squarebracket-trick, but they're all lovely, talented writers and I really appreciate that they let me yell about Beast at them!!! There's also @scribbling-stardust (one of my most recent moots. her oc dahlia and my oc dahlia are literally twins. it's hilarious). Lastly, closing off with @allianaavelinjackson, who isn't very active on tumblr but is nonetheless always available to brainstorm (read: listen to me go insane) over Beast. Love ya <3

#this has gotten insanely long #if I forgot any of you I am so sorry #writeblr #my posts #tag game #beast #wip: beast #I feel like this last part is basically a repeat of the writeblr positivity tag but!!! reminding yall once again that you are awesome!!!!

[invinciblerodent]

Some lines of dialogue from my notebook that I happen to kinda like, just because 🙂

"Of course I've heard of you, [Blade of the Frontiers]. You were my father's favorite son, and he hadn't even sired you."

"I've never chosen anything for myself- not before meeting you. But now, it's... it's you, only you that I want. Messy, mortal, majestic you."

"I thought maybe, if I got my shit together enough to be able to tell you who I am, there could be a chance that you might like that person enough to kiss her."

"Darling, you know I accept compliments face-to-face-- going behind my back for it is such a waste of perfectly good praise."

"Delightful conversation, this. I certainly can't think of a topic more pleasant than my violent death."

"You cannot truly be so arrogant as to believe yourself the first man to break my heart."

"It would be the single greatest kindness you could ever do me, if you promised -this time truly promised- that if I am to go, if I am to change, it'll be you sinking the blade of mercy into my heart."

"I wish I had your kind of confidence. But I've said those same words enough times-- I unfortunately know very well when they're bullshit."

"I'm willing to lie about a lot of things, to a lot of people, but to lie to the pig about how the sausage is made as it is being led to slaughter.. sounds especially cruel."

"I feel that after so long roaming unclaimed, my heart is one that... yearns, for a cage now."

"This person you speak of in such disgust is twice, thrice, a thousand fucking times the man you could ever have hoped to be in your pathetic, hateful, narrow little chickenshit life."

"When I said I'm in love with you, when I said that I choose you, I meant every breath, every syllable, with my being entire. Gods know why you'd choose me in return, but make no mistake, my dear-- the very prospect of my being allowed to love you, it is nothing short of pure euphoria."

"Over a hundred lifetimes, over a million possiblities... there is not a world in which I wouldn't have fallen in love with you."

"Why do you so crave the forgiveness of a goddess so spiteful that she'd deny it to you while you still live?!"

"Oh, darling, I've merely whetted my appetite for you." "Then devour me."

"Wherever you are when your mind is so far, I'd like to go with you someday."

"Aw, were you worried about me?" "No, but I'd have hated to carry you back to camp with your liquefied innards oozing from your every orifice." "See, I was trying to make a joke, and you ruined it." I'm sorry. Does it help if I say I'd have carried you in my arms like a pretty, pretty princess?"

"If I threw myself into the harbor in despair every time I felt guilt over what I've done, the coast would be littered with my corpses."

"I can show you my skill if that is your desire, Saer- or you may also believe me, and stop looking the heavily armed gift horse in the mouth."

#i kinda love my little notes on the margins #like as i'm flipping through pages at one point i just wrote #“ftr i'm high as i write this” #and let me tell you.... you can TELL #my Petyr development notes also say “I'll make him SO goddamn fuckable istg” #which......... well uh #mission accomplished #some of these are from Gale fic #some from Astarion #the obvious one from a Wyll one #and there's a sprinkle of Shadowheart too #squirrel speaks #i hope you can tell which ones are which lol #i mean many are ocs too but I hope their voices are there in the lines meant for them

[countlessrealities]

scrapped ideas meme:

🗑️ ⚖️ 💚

Scrapped / on pause / WIP ideas meme

🗑️ a scrapped element of the blog

When I was developing the backgrounds for my OCs, there was a moment when I debated adding to SR's backstory a tragic / bad element, since he's the only one among them who, all in all, had a decent life without too much drama (for Ricks standards, at least). It would have also been in line with the kind of characters I usually write, because tragic backstories are my guilty pleasure xD

I eventually decided against it both because I wanted to try something different, but also because I wanted a character who could still fit Rick standards when it comes to ruthlessness and asshole-ness, but who also was capable of emotional intelligence underneath. SR is the kind of person who hasn't gone through extreme trauma, but he has enough tact that he can be a support for those who have (see his relationship with AR, for example).

Don't get me wrong, he's not a good guy, he has done terrible things and doesn't feel guilty about them in the least, but he has a loose moral code. And he actively tries to be a decent person with the ones he cares for.

I liked this balance between decency and Rickness, and I knew that it would have been hard to develop it if I had given him some big bad event in his backstory. So, he's the only one of my characters who still has his family, who remained in good terms with his Diane even if they divorced and whose Beth actually has a good family life (also, no Jerry in the picture, so maybe that helped xD).

⚖️ something stuck in limbo

I still haven't properly figured out how I want my Morty to feel about the whole Rick Prime ordeal. In the show, they don't really delve into the consequences of him finding out why Rick chose his original dimension specifically, nor how this changes everything that Rick has chosen to do after.

I'm debating whether Morty would see Rick taking him away after they accidentally Cronenberged his dimension as a sign that Rick had come to care for him or if he would see it as Rick wanting to keep something that of Rick Prime in the hope that he might get an interest. Knowing how forgiving Morty is, especially when it comes to Rick, he would probably pick the first option, but I'm toying with the idea that, deep down, he has doubts. And said doubts come out whenever he has one of his bad moments.

I just love both options, the idea of Weird Rick being something that eventually makes Rick and Morty closer and also more on the same level and the idea that instead it adds to the things that have been creating a rift between them. I'm really torn here!

Tho, knowing me, I'll probably end up figuring out a way to mix them because I can't choose xD

💚 for a coming idea that still needs development

I have this verse for Summer I never got to use, but that I'd love to develop sometimes. Basically, after the whole Space Beth reveal, she decides to ditch Earth and join her space mom's crew. You could call it her Star Wars like adventure verse, I guess xD

In this verse, she still is her sassy, mostly detached self, but she would definitely grow into becoming truly confident, into believing in herself and her skills. And she would do that on her own, not through a reflection of Rick's approval or anyone else's.

It's a version of Summer who has found what she wants to do with her life, what she wants from him and also where she belongs, even while still burdened with everything she has learnt through her experience with Rick and her family.

#[ ooc :: mun scotty on comm ] #[ ooc :: blog info ] #[ ooc :: about the mun ] #technodromes #[[ thanks a lot for the ask !! ]] #;; queue

[momentswithmani]

Affirmations for 2023

I am one of a kind

I am worthy of love

I can make my dream life a reality

I believe in me

I am beautiful

I attract love

I deserve all good things

I am radiant

I am enough

I attract success and happiness

I am worthy of being loved, cherished and celebrated

I am doing my best with what I have

I am fierce, loved, and capable

I am growing + learning every single day

I am worthy of respect

I am worthy of growth

I am courageous

I am intelligent

I belong here

I am worthy of a great life

I am great

I am full of gratitude

I am a positive light

I love myself

I am valuable

Love shines from within me

Love flows through me

I attract loving + affectionate people into my life

I am grateful for the love that surrounds me

I am a priority

I am blessed

I love who I am inside + out

I am worthy of a healthy + loving relationship

I am loved more than I ever thought possible

My self love is infinite

I am comfortable in my own skin

I am proud of who I am

I embrace change

I deserve peace

I am open to new opportunities

I deserve all that is good

I attract wonderful things in my life

I appreciate what my body does for me

My positive energy is sexy and attractive

I attract relationships based on love + honesty

I choose to enjoy the present moment

I am worthy of love

I am thankful for all that I have

My possibilities are endless

I choose thoughts that serve my highest good

I act on inspiration and insight

I use discernment when listening to others

I trust my inner guidance

I choose to be kind to my body

I am admired for my unique beauty

I rise above my insecurities

It is safe for me to be my authentic self

I love myself fully

I bring light to those around me

My confidence increases every day

I release myself from the feelings of fear, shame, and guilt towards my past, present, and future.

I am worthy of forgiveness, compassion, and support

I am heard, I am seen, I am loved

I am safe, supported, and protected now

All parts of me are appreciated, acknowledged, and accepted

My emotions are valid. My needs are vocalized. My feelings are understood.

I am gentle + patient with myself

#mental health #inspiration #mentalheathawareness #mental heath support #black women #self love #note to self #love #self care #self improvement #affirmyourlife #affirmdaily #affirmations #affirmyourself #self worth #reminders #growth #affirm #making progress #journey #loveyourself

[ot-hoe-me]

OCs as Planets

I was tagged by @stephschoices​ and @dakotawritesif​ to do this uquiz for any OCs of my choice. The free online banner maker I used is here.

I tag anyone who wants to do it!

Now, one OC for every planet, in order of creation:

Valencia Talward is my MC for @shepherds-of-haven​

Jupiter 

optimistic. hopeful. generous and compassionate. you are the guardian angel. you are 4:44 am and a sense of being watched over. you enrich the lives of others just by existing and caring for them. you give as many blessings as you receive and there is always more to go around. be careful not to become too over-confident in these abilities. what makes you jupiter is your belief that ego has no part in caring and love. you are softness and the smell of almond coffee.

Dorothea Fairchild is my MC for Perfumare: Avulsion by @pdrrook​

Uranus 

innovative. unpredictable. resourceful. imaginative. creativity in science and disruption. oh, uranus. you were dealt the cards that don't have much to offer, but luckily you can always make them work. you are acrylic paint that has been plastered over the same canvas so many times that it is starting to have those little grooves of texture. you are ever-changing and suddenly it stops. and starts again. keep moving. nothing is wrong with not wanting to sit still.

Ella Wiseman is my MC for Mind Blind by @mindblindbard​

Mercury 

clever. intelligent and witty. wisdom, sharpness, anxiety and indecisiveness. you are the comedian. the "make someone laugh if they are crying" kind of lover. you don’t want to think too much about anything because that stops you from just having fun, but your brain doesn't ever shut off. you are curious and never ending. forecast and shadows. the smell of clean sheets.

Evie Amell is my MC for The Fernweh Saga by @lacunafiction​

Earth

nurturing, generous and caring. introverted, tolerant, honest and trustworthy. you are "my phone is always on, call me any time." you are "i feel like i'm everyone's therapist." you are impressive with your stability and peacefulness. you are wallpapers of cows and fields of ever-growing seeds. you are the best friend. mother nature. ice cold water and the smell of rain.

Cynuise aka The Harbinger of Calamity is my MC for Fell Star by @justpked​

Saturn 

patient. stable. reliable. persevering and diligent. your capacity to hold focus on something you choose to is unmatched by all other planets. you were made for hard work that you love and that you know is rewarding. you are the shoulder that everyone wants to cry on, so remember you can lean on yourself when it seems there is no one else. there is nothing wrong with being self sufficient. you are justice and evenly balanced scales.

Asteria Violette Gaudare is my MC for Beyond the Spider Lilies by @justpked​

Venus 

passionate. romantic. loving to be loved. courtship. adoration and taste. you are your own personal aesthetic. you are hand written love letters in copper ink. you are "let me show you just how much i can love you." you are royalty and class. love has no bounds with you. your heart is wrapped in chocolate tin foil. you attract what you manifest so keep believing in love. it is you and you, it.

Evandra Vailia is my MC for @reapersbayif​

Mars 

passion. energy. drive. determination. you are in tune with yourself and your body and if you don't already feel it, please try to tune into it because it is so powerful. you are at war with yourself and life and it doesn't always have to be so hard. anger is not a useless emotion but do not let it control you. love is more powerful than hatred will ever be. you are the smell of fresh cut grass and the satisfaction of a job well done.

Fallon Rose is my MC for Underfell IF and Mafiafell IF by @darkpetal16​

Neptune 

mercy. kindness. sweet. forgiving and compassionate. you are second chances and sometimes third. you are "its ok because everyone makes mistakes." you are "i forgive you as long as you are learning." you are not held down by the demands of your ego. you believe in right and fair. open mindedness and friendship. you are mystical and magical, observant and the smell of warm bread in the morning.  

#My OC #My OCs #Valencia Talward #Thea Fairchild #Ella Wiseman #Evie Amell #Cynuise #Asteria Violette Gaudare #Evandra Vailia #Fallon Rose #God I have so many OCs and I've barely talked about any of them and have tags for even less #The vast majority of the known lore is only in my own noggin so this took WAY longer than I thought it was going to lmao #And yes Fallon's name is a pun #And yes she does have a Kindness SOUL

[edoro]

Caleb and his wife (and if you're up for it, Belord). ☕️

under a cut bc it got long!

Caleb and his wife: i am sooo fascinated with them. i want to know everything. Caleb is really just the character of all time, he's this ghost haunting the narrative whose death led directly to the entire story we see, but we know virtually nothing about him.

i'm very fond of my characterization of Caleb as a person who, as a survival mechanism, developed the ability to just Choose Not To See things that were threatening or painful, which came to include "every single one of the five billion red flags that Philip was waving all the time." i enjoy more complex takes on him that explore what his personal role in the absolute nightmare dumpster fire his and Philip's relationship clearly became might have been, and dislike the tendency to treat him as a precious cinnamon roll golden retriever boy (outside of like, obvious jokes/shitposts.)

i'm less firm on my mental characterization for his wife... she's fun to think about but exists as far more of like, an accessory to a plot device (Caleb being the plot device, LOVE his fridged anime mom energy) to me.

i like imagining her as someone who was really interested in the human realm, kind of similarly to the way Gus is, except she actually got to go there sometimes! it's really fun to think about the culture shock she experienced meeting Caleb and gradually finding out how fucking bonkers the culture he comes from is - like imagine your first introduction to Christianity being a seventeenth century literal Puritan.

the two of them are some really fertile ground for like, trauma recovery hurt/comfort - Caleb finding out how harmful and abnormal his upbringing was, getting to experience someone being like "wow none of that should have happened."

i also really enjoy imagining scenarios where like, the two of them end up spending time around or even living with Philip for a while, and he becomes a huge source of friction in their marriage, because Caleb's always overlooking his shitty behavior and making excuses for him, but witchwife doesn't have the same attachment.

(also interesting to consider that Caleb seems to have been willing to finally stand up to Philip and say enough when it came to protecting his wife, so, there IS a line Pip could cross...)

Belord: i love it so much. makes a terrifying amount of sense? like it's such a crackship but at the same time... there's genuinely a lot of intense emotional potential there. i can so easily see it actually happening, they would go together so well and have SUCH a bad breakup.

it's just so... it's such a relationship where both of them are using each other as stand-ins, basically. Philip of course just projects like hell onto Ford, sees him as basically another version of himself, and is so desperate for another human to be around that he'll completely forgive and excuse things totally antithetical to his own worldview.

and Ford does have a fundamentally opposed worldview! Ford loves the strange, paranormal, supernatural, occult, etc - he finds it fascinating and worthy of study, he finds it marvelous. he doesn't see it as something threatening which needs to be stamped out, he sees it as beautiful and relates to it.

Ford sees himself as a person rejected by and outside of typical society, and spitefully embraces that; at his worst he considers himself better than the people who reject him, at his best he's got a supreme sense of self-confidence and understanding of who he is and what his place in the world is.

Philip meanwhile is someone who i think has also been rejected and feels outside of typical society, and also looks down on those who have rejected him, but also tries incredibly hard to fit in and earn their respect. like, Ford knows nobody respects his study of the supernatural, but it means the world to him; Philip's whole thing here revolves around trying to gain status for himself and be the best and gain the regard of his community, a community i sincerely doubt was ever kind to him.

and Ford of course... is someone who is very vulnerable to flattery and having his ego stroked and also very lonely, and i think he would be really prone to ignoring Philip's red flags. they both project onto each other about their respective brother experiences, they both want to see each other as Just What They've Been Looking For, and for a time at least they both are able to be that for each other... but of course it can't last.

#caleb wittebane #witchwife #belord #asks

[ye-local-simp]

Hi !! I came across your blog a while ago and since there’s a match up event may I request a TWST match-up 💕

I’m an Aries and an INFP. A cis female, I’m really short about Ortho height, black short cuts above my shoulders. I usually wear whatever makes me comfortable, my hair is always messy I never bother to tidy myself up lmao. I do have a high sense of fashion I just don’t use it very often.

I’m super quiet and awkward when surrounded by strangers, I find it hard to make friends or to actually express my emotions resting bitch face <3. I’ll only talk when people come to me first. I don’t open up easily but when I do I tend to get more chaotic and playful. I'm really open-minded open to everyone's opinion and take criticism very well. When I hate someone I won’t try to hide it and just straight it show to their face. A compassionate person, that once I choose to care for someone, that care will never go away, no matter how much they hurt me. It’s actually hard to get me to hate or hold grudges against anyone since I’m kinda forgiving and laid back. I feel super uncomfortable when people confront me or even try to befriend me too fast it makes my trust issue goes off the roof. I try to see the best in others and put myself in other people's perspectives before judging. I tend to live in my own head and daydream all the time instead of focusing on the real world. I may act tough and strong but I’m also quite sensitive, I can handle physical pain but not emotional. I take every decision with care and will never be caught acting recklessly. I'm actually a really hard-working person, I believe without working and trying your best then you won't be able to achieve your goal, and yes I also dislike the idea of wishing for something to present itself. I admire honesty, people with confidence in themselves and who know their place. I despise those who lack self-awareness and do not make an effort to change for the better. I love to encourage my people on being themselves and I find it cute seeing people doing what they love and the smile on people's faces. The worst insult ever to me is that people tell me that I'm selfish because I care a lot about others even if I don't want to. My love language is act of service and quality time. I fall in love rather quickly and hard to fall out of it.

My interest is Art, that is literally what I do every day and what I want to pursue for the rest of my life. I really like to eat, anything really but I mostly prefer sweets and spicy stuff. I like plushies and anything cute. I don't get scared easily and indifferent to most things, my favorite movie genres are horror, comedy, and action. I'm not into sport mainly because I'm quite short on stamina but I am fairly strong for my size. I don't know what to add anymore but I kin Ei, Shenhe, and Sucrose 🎨. Apologize if this is long ( ･ᴗ･̥̥̥ ) and I hope you are having a wonderful day ! ( sorry I suck at social interaction )



I am going to match you up with...

Deuce!!

-A very straightforward and honest person so you would definitely have no issue of him hiding things from you. He is one of the few who knows how sensitive you really are so he acts as your bodyguard and makes you feel independent at the same time. Meaning that he doesn't really tower over you all the time. He would definitely be the one to get you out of uncomfortable conditions too.

-In terms of your interests, he is not really an artistic person but would definitely be supportive of your art.Anyone who even thinks about dissing it is dead even before the bad critisms reach you(if there even is any). You might have to explain that some critisms may help you improve though.

-Since he is a lot more on the masculine side, he would definitely gift you feminine things or things that he heard that a lot of women would like like arcade plushies,fluffy notebooks and flowers so his gifts are usually great if you love those kinds of things.He would definitely ask his mum for advice on how to woo you too.

-The only issue would be that he may not understand your advances or how you are actually feeling since this guy is very dense when it comes to feelings

#twisted wonderland matchup event #twisted wonderland matchup #twst match up event #twst matchup #twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twisted wonderland fluff #twst fluff #twst scenarios #twst headcanons

[tldhf]

Day of Prayer (2/23/24)

Psalm 23 - My address to the Lord

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. [I have more than I could ever desire from you, Lord.]

He makes me lay down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. [You give me peace and rest and meet all of my needs, showing kindness and beauty to me.]

He restores my soul. He leads me on paths of righteousness for His name's sake. [You fill me up when I am feeling emptied and weary, while leading me on the path to you, giving guidance to my steps.]

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death. I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and staff, they comfort me. [Even when my life feels dark and saturated with sin, I will not be afraid, because you never leave me. You are always there to give me conviction and offer repentance, and to discipline me out of the love and care you have for me, to call me back to yourself when I stray.]

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. [Even in the face of those who have hurt me, or those who are against you, you claim me as yours and unhurriedly make a place for me. You mark me with oil as one who is pleasing to you and give me more than I could ever imagine. My heart overflows with the love with which you lavish upon me.]

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever. [I know that for all of my life here on earth, I will get to experience your goodness and mercy, even when things are hard. When my time here comes to an end, I can rest in knowing that I have a home in your house, Lord, that I will come home to you.]

...

God, I confess that all too often, I do not believe the words above. All too often, I don't choose to remember who you are. I become so wrapped up in the world around me or the tempest swirling within me that I forget to look up. It's almost as if I drift into this amnesia of sorts, where I forget that you are the king, MY king and not only my king but also my father and I am your daughter, the daughter of a king, the king of all kings. I forget that there is no where I walk that you haven't led, there is no storm that passes over me that hasn't gotten your permission to. There is no battle I face or hardship I encounter that surprises or worries you. Any fear I have is not fear from you because you are not a God of fear but one of love. As it is written in 1 John 4:15-18;

"Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God.

So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgement, because as he is so also are we in this world.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love."

Fear is not of you, because fear involves punishment and you are not a God of punishment but one of forgiveness and love for those who you have chosen. As your chosen, we can be free of fear, knowing that punishment is not for us, but rather love which is free of it. We are disciplined, to be shown right from wrong, but not punished. Because of Jesus's death on the cross and His rising 3 days later, our sins too were put to death and we were risen with Christ anew, as sons and daughters of you Lord. How could I forget this? How could I drift into that amnesia over and over again when I have seen such stark and undeniable evidence of you in my life over and over again?

You are in the stars and the moon, the sky, the rising and setting of the sun, the clouds, the trees, the soaring birds above, the green grass, the animals that roam in its expanse. You are the whisper of a breeze on a balmy summer day, the falling tree leaves in autumn, the dusting of snow visiting in winter, and the bright blooming flowers of spring. All that is and ever was, you are in. Genesis 1:1-25 tells in detail the goodness of all that you made, but to sum it up in a sentence;

"All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made." (John 1:3)

How then could I forget you? How could I forget who made all that I love? How could I let anything but you encompass my thoughts and entrap my mind when you are in everything I see? And not only are you in all that was made, but also in all who were made. When I wake in the morning, you are there in the face of the man I love, you are there in a friend calling to ask about my day, in my grandmother lending a helping hand, the team I serve with in ministry, the fellow church member I worship alongside on Sunday. But those aren't the only faces I find you in. You are there even still in the stranger passing hurriedly on the street, the man on the corner begging for some spare change, the bored clerk at the grocery store, the student in the dining talking to her friend about her latest hook-up, the guy who cut me off on the way to work, the father who didn't want me as a child, the step-mother who tormented me for years. You are in ever face of every person and even the face of the person looking back at me in the mirror.

"Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.'

So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." (Genesis 1:26-27)

How then could I forget you? When you are in every line and wrinkle of every face I could ever look upon, you are even in me. And yet I am so prone to forgetting. BUT GOD. You are the light in the darkness of my forgetful ways, calling me back, calling me to remember. You are the lighthouse shining in the distance, guiding me back to your safety when I am lost in the sea of this world. I am never out of your reach, I am never "too far gone" for you to bring me home again.

I am sorry Father, that I forget you. That I forget who I am. That I forget that all of this earth is yours. That I forget that every person in my midst, while not all your children, are still bearers of your image and worthy of respect and love as such. That I forget to cast aside fear for I have been perfected in love... In your love. Forgive me Father, for forgetting time and time again that you already have. On the cross, you bore my sins and the sins of all your children. And on that cross, we were saved while Jesus died. And when He rose, we rose too, in glory with Him.

I am sorry Father that I not only forget, but that I also do not trust. I fall victim to the circumstances of the things I cannot control far too often and its because I simply don't trust that you are in control of it all. Even when I remember and know who you are, my pride and my desperate desire for control leads me to distrust you. How could I not trust in you when you have done all you said you would in Christ, and more. When you make my cup overflow, when you give me peace in the storms I sit in. When I can look back and see over and over again how you have made a way for me. I do not, at times, even trust that I am forgiven but I see it over and over in the Gospel, that I am. So clearly it says in Ephesians 2:4-6;

"But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us,

even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ--by grace you have been saved--

and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus,"

I praise you Father for these truths, made new to me time and time again. When I forget, you remind me. When I don't believe, you show me it is true. When I don't trust, you still hold me securely. When I turn away, you pull me back. You are the good shepherd who never leaves me nor leads me astray. I thank you for choosing me and saving me. I am so beyond grateful to be saved in this way but also to be able to rest in knowing that this gift cannot and will not ever be taken from me. Even though I do nothing to deserve it, even though I at times don't remember it, or show gratitude for it, even when I don't even trust that its mine; none of this removes it from me. You never take it back, you always remind me its mine, that YOU are mine Jesus. I praise you for this Lord, over and over I praise you.

...

"Now to Him, who is able to do far more abundantly that all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us,

to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen."

Ephesians 3:20-21

[holyathome]

LIVING...Being All God Wants You to Be

part 1 of 2: A Girl Named BEXTER05

Each child...each and everyone (and all adults, too) has been intricately designed and created by a Master Designer - the very God Who fashioned the universe. Several years back, I lived in Colorado Springs, CO for a spell when I attended the Focus on the Family Institute. This experience had an impact on my life in so many levels. For me, the Greek word Metamorphoó (think metamorphosis) was played out in a personal way. Our first night there, one of our professors, Dr. Del Tackett talked about Abram and how God changed his name to Abraham. He told us their desire for us was that each of us would go through a metamorphosis like a caterpillar entering a cocoon and coming out a beautiful butterfly. At the time, I had no idea what that could even mean for my life, but as the weeks and months progressed, God was definitely transforming me into the girl Who He had created me to be and do (more about that in my next entry).

Butterfly metamorphosis photos courtesy of Mary Beth Ludt.

When I arrived in Colorado Springs, I was somewhat timid, was often more comfortable leaning into my introverted side (I have a good dose of an extroverted side, too...but it was rarely seen), knew all about God, and was confident that Jesus was my Saviour.

When I left things were different - the classes had helped me realize that I had a ton of head knowledge about God, but until then it wasn't fully translated into heart knowledge...a.k.a. living as the gal God had Created me to be; the Christian Community I experienced, especially that of my super awesome apartment-mates was extra-ordinary and those friendships helped me feel more confident being the fun-loving (the extrovert was popping out of the cocoon!), life-living girl God desired me to be; and the times of worship and opportunities for spiritual growth opened my eyes to living FOR Jesus in a whole new way! When the day came that we had to leave Colorado, it was a sad day, because it had been such an awesome experience with some fabulous new friends. However, I left having truly experienced Metamorphoó - I was free to fly like a butterfly being the person who God had masterfully created and I was ready to live into that design!

As a matter of fact, my roomie, Michelle told me the week before we left - "I think you have been like Abram...God's work is evident and you need a name change!" The apartment-mates had nicknamed me Bexter, So, Bexter05 became the official name they gave me to represent the shift. To this day, when I see my name Bexter, it has great significance in reminding me to live as the person God wants me to be! Stay tuned for part 2.

Along with two of my awesome Colorado Springs apartment-mates (Michelle & Trish) who gave me my new name - Bexter05.

For this entry, you can see the progression of what you can help your kids come to understand about LIVING to be ALL GOD WANTS THEM TO BE -see Chart below for your child's age grouping.

AGES 0-4:

God wants you to be good, kind, and loving, just like Him & Jesus.

God wants you to see and think good things.

AGES 5-6:

God has a plan for you.

The Bible tells you the kind of person God wants you to be.

God's way works best; you can be all God wants you to be by following Jesus.

God wants you to put only good things into your heart.

When you sin, you should ask God to forgive you -- and He will.

AGES 7-9:

God wants you to learn and grow and become like Jesus.

Growth is a learning process.

Your character should match God's character.

God wants you to develop your talents.

God wants you to develop the Fruit of the Spirit.

God wants you to mature and develop your personality.

AGES 10-12:

God wants you to choose to grow, learn, and seek His wisdom.

God's grace: You don't have to do it on your own. God is working in you by His Holy Spirit.

God wants you to find and follow His will for your life.

#holyathome #lcafamilydiscipleship #lca2324 #chefsprinklesatwork

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bullet points adapted from Teaching Kids About God by John Trent, Rick Osborne, & Kurt Bruner Disclaimer: These are my reflections and not necessarily meant to express the views of Lexington Christian Academy.

[foggyparadisecandy]

Foggy 2.0

Just a recap of the good things that have happened in the last two+ months since my partner split.

It's been a lot tbh ...

I've reconnected with RL friends that I have not seen since pre-COVID. I forgot how fun some of these idiots are. lol

I've made a crapton of new friends online. I love hearing people's stories and ... ngl ... damages. I feel comfort in other people's pains and struggles. It makes me understand that we all have challenges. Life goes on.

I've met a very special, interesting woman who is combination supportive and challenging - calling out my bullshit one moment and encouraging my insanity the next. Who could ask for anything better from a friend?

I lost ten pounds ... somewhat unhealthily at first because I wasn't eating ... but it's all good. I wanted to get a bit thinner so ... yeah! I'm happy about this for the most part.

I have recharged my work life for the first time in a decade. Still got some ways to go but I've set a huge goal for next year and my goal is to knock it out of the park. I want to make a shit ton of money to create some sort of trauma relief or self-help resources for hurting people. Possibly military specific resources. Not sure yet. I have time to figure it out.

I'm sorting through parental damages that have plagued me my entire life. IDK if this will ever get sorted - it's been in me for a long time but I'm going to do my best to process it in a healthy way so I can minimize the damages and recognize the symptoms of unhealthy behaviors. I've been pretty low on myself my entire life lol ... "low" is an understatement. haha. Either way ... working on it now!

I'm exercising a good amount. It's kind of boring but also ... I find it to be meditative when I get in the zone. Plus I'm seeing muscles that I haven't seen for a looooong time. lol. I'm not vain but it does help with my self-confidence to feel in a decent shape.

My home life isn't better necessarily but there is a lot more transparency and open-ness. Honestly this hasn't been on my top 10 things I've even given a shit about working on for a long time. Still isn't. There is more to life than mere existence, dear readers. It's ok to want more and be honest with yourself and your partner(s).

I've been more open with people about my pain and depression. I've made some strong connections with people who have taken my authenticity as an opportunity to express their own challenges. I think mental health is a dirty dangerous secret and I'm ok with putting it out there and giving people the courage to do the same.

I've gotten to know a lot more about myself through reading and talking with a lot of those damaged folks I've met online and in RL. lol. I am learning new things all the time - really stretching myself to grow and evolve. Hard fucking work and I have a long way to go but ... I really am enjoying it.

I feel ... stronger in all ways. More capable. More clear-headed. I have desires like I haven't for a very long time. Desires to achieve more with my life. Do more. Help more people. Make a difference.

I feel better about myself and who I am. No matter what struggles I have with self-image, it's been ... heart-warming ... to hear people tell me about kindnesses small and large that I've done for them over the years in an effort to remind me of who I am. It's ... IDK ... I guess karma is a real thing. I'm a pretty kind and nice person and I've put out a lot of love to people in need. I didn't do it for gain, but it sure is nice to hear people paying it back and giving me ego boosts here and there.

I love and I forgive. I am working on setting boundaries - I don't understand them. I know that. But also I'm talking with my therapist about figuring out a balance here. If I choose to love you, I'm going all in and loving you hard. I'm ok with being kind and supportive. I'm ok with forgiving those I love. I feel they deserve it and I think too many people haven't had enough love or forgiveness in their lives. I don't see my approach as weakness. It's strength.

I was blessed by being part of my former partner's life for as long as she allowed it. It was fucking amazing. She was so open and lovely about everything. Open to trying things. She taught me so much about myself and life. It's funny ... she always had the control ... I knew that and ... as much as it hurt me the way she exercised it (she could have done it differently fr but I forgive 100%) ... I hope she understands it and it gives her comfort - she has power and control even in the submissive role in a relationship. Good thing to keep in mind.

I was blessed that my partner was so brave and strong and showed me how someone with such a tough start to life could perservere and rise to the occasion. It inspired me tbh. It's one of the primary things that made me fall for her. Yeah ... she's got some work to do ... who doesn't? But she's got the core characteristics to succeed in life. She'll go far. I believe in her.

I was extremely fortunate that she reached out and helped ease so many of my fears over her well-being. I honestly can't thank her enough. I feel a million times better. My worry for her was crushing me. My worry that I had hurt her. My worry that she would be killed. So many small worries that she put to rest. I know how hard that was for her to do. She confirmed my belief in her character - even if she probably still doesn't see what I see. I have faith that if she keeps going, she'll get there. I believe in her. Yeah ... I repeated that. My blog so ... suck it.

I 100% Achievements on Binding of Isaac. There were 99 Achievements - I'm taking this as a win! I had started playing this right before the split and I couldn't find the motivation to start a new game so this was a good one to be immersed in ... 400+ hours to distract myself from stuff. Good times.

There's dozens of other small things, here and there.

I won't go so far as expressing gratitude for the break-up but I feel that it's woken me up to more possibilities in my life and ... yeah ... fuck it ... I guess there is some gratitude in there after all.

I'm ok with that.

#catharsis #self love #self care