#i did actually very much appreciate the short flashback at the beginning

[straylaughs]

dont know how to go about formulating my thoughts about the entire show but i do have to give bucchigiri its flowers for that absolutely stunning fight sequence between matakara and arajin

#like ???????? #wowie #the animation always goes hard for the fight sequences but this was so good #also super fun seeing arajin WANTING to fight and giving his all #kinda got langa flashbacks when arajin was falling in the void LOL #i honestly cant figure out what to say about the finale #like its been at least an hour since i finished it and i still don't know #so on a very surface level i'd say it was cute #i did actually very much appreciate the short flashback at the beginning #because it does really make sense as to why matakara clung to him #as for arajin himself #congrats to him for being a honki person ig? (which i still don't fully understand but im okay with that tbh) #and the blood stamp he gave matakara was cute too #... that's about all i can think of to say (there's definitely more i could think of) #like zabu not telling komao that matakara nearly killed him but maybe that wouldn't have mattered question mark #anyways #my official bucchigiri rating: ''sure?''/10 #bucchigiri?!

[yexthiccxa]

The Angel With Horns Pt. 2

summary: the man you despise, satoru gojo is unfortunately your mentor at jujutsu high. he agreed to help you get with your childhood crush, suguru geto, but things have taken a bit of a turn after that last "mentoring" session

this is a continuation of part 1, but if you don't care about plot, feel free to read this as a one shot (:

wordcount: 9.7k 🙃 (i guess i just get carried away. this is also 4 chapters btw)

c/w: gojo/fem!reader, geto/fem!reader, gojo/oc, geto/oc, modern!au, teacher!au, smut, fluff & smut, some plot, plot what plot, rough!sex, flashbacks, asshole!gojo, flirty!gojo, cocky!gojo, soft!geto, rough!geto, cousin!shoko, mutual pining, confessing, teasing, flirting, playful banter, friends to lovers, enemies to lovers, sensual tension, sexual tension, pet names, degradation, fingering, f!masturbation, oral, fantasizing, choking, light gagging, multiple orgasms, inappropriate use of cursed energy, inappropriate use of cursed techniques

a/n: hiii thanks for the love on pt. 1! again this is my first fic so feedback is very much appreciated! will be working on part 3(some) ;)

Read Part 1 Here!

✦✧✸✧✦ 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ✦✧✸✧✦

Chapter 5: Regret

I’m alone with my thoughts, trying to stop the embarrassment from consuming me. I look out the windows before peeking down the hallway—no sign of Satoru anywhere. I realize I’m searching for someone who doesn’t want to be seen.

The intimacy I shared with Sugu—I mean, Satoru, has me conflicted. My mind thinks one thing, but my body feels the other, ultimately bringing me right back where I started. But this time around, my thoughts are coherent enough to take over.

If there’s anyone who would leave without saying goodbye, it’s Satoru. If there’s anyone who would be an absolute tease, it’s Satoru. If there’s anyone who would fuck now and not give a shit later, it’s Satoru. After all this time we spent together, I thought things would change. But now it’s crystal clear: Satoru Gojo will never change.

“Satoru is so annoying,” Shoko grumbled as she barged into my room.

“What’d he do this time?” I asked. With graduation around the corner, all I could think about was passing my exams.

“I asked him out, but he shot me down. He told me it’s because he likes someone else,” Shoko revealed. 

To keep our conversation short, I replied with, “Yeah that sucks I guess, but I’m sure you’re better off just being friends.”

Shoko plopped herself onto my bed, lacing her fingers behind her head while she stared at the ceiling. “Honestly, that’s totally fine—but that’s not the annoying part,” she started. “The annoying part is that he won’t tell me who. He talks about all the girls he hooks up with, but now he wants to keep it a secret? I just don’t get Satoru.”

I let out a sigh, “Maybe he’s just messing with you the same way he does with me. After all, Satoru is such a dick.”

✦✧✸✧✦

I spend the evening doing chores in hopes of forgetting what happened earlier this afternoon. If Satoru is going to be like this, the best thing I can do is to leave the past in the past. With my mentorship being over, I have no reason to even think about him anymore. All I need to do now is stick to the plan and keep my energy focused on Suguru.

Oh, right. Suguru. As the image of him forms in my mind, I’m reminded of our date. I’ve been so caught up with Satoru, I realized that I’m nowhere near prepared for tomorrow.

He said to meet at his place, but are we staying there? Or just meeting, then going out? Should I dress up? Or down? Heels, boots, or sneakers? My internal debate goes on for far too long before I finally decide to give him a call. 

The phone rings and I’m greeted with his signature velvety tone. “Did you miss the sound of my voice?” Suguru asks.

I’m immediately paralyzed, unsure of how to reply.

He lets out a little chuckle, “I’m just kidding. What’s up?”

“Ha. ha. Very funny.” I begin to ease up but butterflies still linger in my core. “I actually just wanted to ask what we’re doing tomorrow. I’m trying to figure out what to wear.”

Suguru pauses for a moment, “I don’t want to give away all the surprises, but let’s keep it simple and say dinner. I can’t tell you where, but just wear whatever makes you feel good.”

A surprise? My body tenses in excitement. “Okay, fine. I can work with this. Thank you! I’ll talk to you later!”

“No problem, see you tomorrow,” He replies.

Before I can hang up, Suguru calls for me one last time. When he gets my attention, he finally says, “I’m really excited for our date. I can’t wait to see you.”

“Me too.” I hang up the phone, and I can’t seem to wipe the grin off my face. I’m finally going on a real date with Suguru.

✦✧✸✧✦

The next day arrives and at 7pm, I find myself standing in front of Suguru’s door. I’m fixing the dress that I picked out the night before. It’s a black velvet mini dress with sheer cuffed sleeves. The sweetheart neck accentuates my chest, while the fitted flare skirt hugs my curves—the perfect blend of cozy, but classy. My nerves increase after the first knock, but it washes away when the door opens and I see Suguru’s face. 

Although the door is only halfway open, his physical presence still commands the space. His smile is pure and his eyes gaze at me with sincerity. “Please come in,” he says.

When I walk inside to take off my shoes, he closes the door and his footsteps echo towards me. I feel his hand cup the small of my back and a shock jolts through my body. His fingers brush against the zipper of my dress. As he slowly leans down to my ear, he whispers, “You look beautiful tonight.” The hairs on the back of my neck stand up and my heart begins to melt.

“Aww, thank you. You’re looking quite handsome yourself,” I reply, smiling in adoration. 

I take a moment to look around the apartment and my eyes widen. Flower petals line the hallway floor, leading me to the living space. The space is larger than I would expect for a Tokyo apartment. Across the room, windows stretch from the floor to the ceiling, making it feel ten times bigger. The lighting is soft, but the glow from the lamps warm up the space.

My eyes continue to wander until they finally land on his dining room table. Though the table is set for two, it’s completely filled with several plates of food. I see perfectly formed pieces of nigiri, various bowls of soup, an array of grilled fish and meats, and bowls of rice neatly placed on the side. 

“Oh my god, Suguru…did you make all of this?” I ask in disbelief.

He nods, curling his mouth into a smile.

“Do you do this for all your dates?” I challenge, raising my brow.

“Nope, just for you.” He makes his way towards the table. “Since you recently moved back, I wanted to make it feel like home.”

I can feel my jaw drop. I try to speak but nothing comes out. “I—I don’t even know where to start,” I finally reply.

He pulls out a seat and offers his hand to me, “You can start by eating.”

It takes everything I have to resist eating everything in one bite, but the taste is so delicious. Each bite is a burst of flavor that sends me to the moon. Even if our date ended here, I would easily be satisfied. When we finish up our meal, I help him pack the leftovers and clean up.

As we’re washing dishes together, I turn to him. “Suguru, thank you for cooking. You’ve always taken such good care of me. I really don’t deserve you.”

He pauses to turn off the water and wipe his hands. I watch him move towards me to cradle my face while his fingers trace the edge of my jawline. “I told you once before and I’ll tell you again, I like taking care of you. Always have, always will.”

We gaze into each other’s eyes, and for a moment, time stands completely still. I gently place my hands on his chest. His heart beats fast, like it’s trying to challenge my own. Is he just as nervous as I am? As I slowly grasp the wrinkles of his shirt, his pulse quickens and his breath becomes shallow. When I see his smile begin to form, I close my eyes and pull him down to meet my lips.

Suguru’s mouth molds into mine and it’s everything I could’ve ever imagined. I love how his lips are soft and his grasp is warm, nothing in this world can compare. As he guides me to the sink, my back arches and I can feel myself getting engulfed into his body. It’s covering me with comfort and protection. I’ve imagined this moment many times and it’s absolute perfectio—he pulls away.

Suguru walks towards the dining room and he mutters something with his head in his hands.

I follow him, tugging at his sleeve. “Hey, is everything okay? Did I do something wrong?”

He finds his way to the couch muttering, “No, no. It’s not you.” After a moment of thought, he continues, ”Sorry, I just thought I could do this but I’m scared of what might happen to us. I don’t want to hurt you, and I definitely don’t want to lose you again.”

I take a seat next to him, placing one hand on his shoulder, and the other over his knee. “Hurt me? Lose me? Again? Suguru, what are you talking about?”

He brushes my arm, hesitant for what comes next. The room is quiet and I can almost hear his heartbeat with mine. “During your last summer here,” he starts. He takes in a breath and slowly lets his words tumble out. “I was talking to Satoru for you—basically telling him to lighten up on the jokes and all that. He seemed to  take it well, but I remember him saying, ‘Fine. But she’s leaving soon anyways so it doesn’t really matter.’ I wasn’t sure what he meant at first, but he ended up telling me that he overheard you talking to Shoko… about moving away.”

My heart drops as memories of that day slowly piece back together…

“Are you really going to leave?” Shoko asked.

I gave an apologetic nod. “It’ll be good for me to get out there, you know? I’d travel the world, learn from other teachers, see if there are bigger and better things out there for me.” I let out a sigh. “I feel like there’s not much here for me anymore.”

“I get it. Well, just know that I’ll miss you. I’m sure the guys will too,” Shoko said as she gave me a hug.

I laughed, “Doubt it.”

I return to the moment and look at Suguru. When he sees tears forming in my eyes, he wipes them away. His hand tightens around mine before he says, “I didn’t think that was true until you told me yourself. It hurt me so much inside but, who was I to stop you from finding yourself or seeing the world? You deserved to do all the things you wanted to do.”

But all I wanted was you. Are you saying you wanted me too? Droplets trickle down my face, but I keep my eyes locked onto his—taking in every single word.

“After you left, I was a mess. I stopped training, so my cursed energy weakened. Then during one of our missions, I fucked up and part of my soul merge with a cursed spirit. When it took over my body, it was strong. It’s a long story, but the main point is— I’m scared to get too close. I don’t think it’s safe.”

I bring myself in closer, moving my hand to his face. “But Suguru, I always feel safe when I’m with you. It’s always been like that, even now…especially now.”

“Yeah, but that’s because I’ve trained myself to control it. When I lose my senses, it slips out, and when it slips out…it isn’t pretty—it just doesn’t feel like me. Even though I’m still the same person physically, everything else becomes more intense. The rage, the aggression, all the things in between.”

He pauses, placing his hand around my cheek. “I like you, a lot. But if I ever let anything happen to you…or worse, if I let myself do anything to hurt you, I don’t know what I would do.”

My heart is pounding, my mind goes blank. The world goes silent as his voice becomes an echo. Is this…real? I open my mouth to let my words out, but nothing. I eventually muster up the strength to ask a question, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was going to, but when you said that you didn’t have anything left here… well, I thought that also meant me. I never wanted to be the one to hold you back.” He retracts and his face becomes resigned.

Before he can pull away, I bring my face to his. “Suguru, I’ve liked you for a very long time. And I appreciate you for letting me live my life, but I promise you—I’m ready for this. For you. For all of you.”

His face softens and shows a smile of relief. “All I want to do is take care of you,” he starts. I can feel his hands tremble. “But I’m scared of the person I’ll become.”

“Suguru…” I lift myself up, slowly climbing over to straddle him. His frame is large, but I still feel myself fit comfortably around him. As I settle myself onto his lap, I feel his bulge pulse against my center. The tension in the air grows as I move myself closer. I let my mouth linger inches away from his and whisper. “I trust you.”

He stops momentarily, savoring every last word that fell from my mouth. His eyes ignite and I can feel fire coursing through his soul. In one second, I feel his breath and in the next, I feel his mouth. He plants a kiss onto my lips, letting his hands roam around me.

Unlike before, this kiss is searing with passion. One hand grabs my hair while the other grabs my ass, and he lays me on the couch until his body is covering me. He pulls away for just a moment before he growls, “Then let me feel you, beautiful.”

Chapter 6: Rough

Something in the room has changed, as though the air has warmed up around us. Traces of Suguru’s cursed energy illuminate the room, forming a blue haze that floats above us. I let out a breath of awe—everything in this moment feels like a dream.

My attention floats back to Suguru as his kisses effortlessly consume me. It’s like he knows all the spots that make me tremble. As he kisses his way down my neck, his hands move to the contours of my curves. When he gets to my chest, he uses his fingers to pull down the neckline of my dress. My heart beats out of me as I’m completely exposed.

He stares for a moment, slowly cupping his hand around my breast. His tongue works my nipple, while my hands grab his hair. The tie on his bun slips and I feel his locks gently fall. The Suguru I’ve known has always been proper—pristine, but the way he looks right now makes him absolutely primal.

As his lips are tugging on me, I feel his hand slip between my thighs. They’re large and overpowering, but they feel so soft as they dance against my skin. There’s no doubt in my mind that his touch is absolutely perfect. His tugs turn into nibbles and a surge of liquid gushes between my legs. As my back arches with pleasure, he pulls off my panties and gently caresses my folds. Suguru brings himself up to kiss me and purrs, “Baby girl, you are soaking wet.”

He continues to treat my breasts with care and I can feel him rub the edges of my slit. I relax myself back into the couch and let the rhythmic passes of his fingers take me—teasing me with every stroke.

“Please Suguru,” I breathe. My voice is needy, unsteady.

He picks up his head while the edge of his mouth curls to the side. Easing his fingers into me, he rumbles, “Anything for you, my love.”

His fingers barely enter me, but the sheer size of them is enough to make me whimper. The thoughts in my head no longer exist. It’s just me, him, and the rush of desire flowing through me. As he glides them back and forth I can feel my juices slip out. My walls contract and pleasure grows between my thighs.

He slides in nice and slow, feeling every inch of the warmth inside of me. The ridges of his fingers press against me, massaging every crevice he can find. Oh how I wish this would never stop.

“Do you like when I touch your pussy like this?” Suguru asks. His voice is sultry and slow.

I can’t find the words so all I do is nod.

He slows down to give me a kiss before his smirk grows into a full on smile. He slides down the couch until he’s near my entrance. “Spread your legs and I can make you feel so much better.”

Whenever he speaks, goosebumps travel across my skin.

He lowers his head and drags his tongue across my slit. It’s wet and warm, emulating the essence of the cream between my legs. His mouth moves all over my center and I can feel myself pulsate against him. He sucks me, licks me, completely consumes me, and all I can do is yell his name. I lock my fingers onto his hair every time he makes me moan.

“You taste so good.” The vibration of his words travel through my walls.

Just like his kisses, his mouth is rough and needy, wanting to taste every bit of me. He swallows every bit of liquid that oozes out and I can tell his mouth is drenched because of me.

As he continues devouring me with his tongue, I feel the length of his fingers tease my entrance. He slides them into me and my moans begin to amplify. My back arches further and the tension continues to build.

His tongue and his fingers move perfectly in sync, I can’t take it. It’s wet, sloppy, and the drumming around my clit leaves me enchanted. I can feel myself reaching my limit.

“Don’t stop,” I pant. My moans become louder and I can feel the tingles creep into my core. “I— I’m gonna come.” 

His pace remains steady, but that doesn’t stop the pleasure from climbing. He doesn’t pick up his head to speak, but the way he drives into me lets me know he’s saying, “Come for me.”

The thought leaves me in absolute heat. I let out one last moan and I feel the orgasm flow through my body. Waves of ecstasy slam against every end of my body. For a moment, I stay still, taking deep breaths and feeling every tingle leave my body. The clouds of Suguru’s cursed energy are still floating around us and I remember that this time, it’s not actually a dream.

I keep my eyes locked on Suguru as he climbs off of the couch. His hair is disheveled and his shirt is wrinkled, but he still looks as handsome as ever. He offers his hand to pull me up, and greets me with a kiss. I feel him pull away, but he remains close and utters softly, “I’m not done with you yet, beautiful.”

He gently turns me around and starts to unzip my dress. As his fingers brush off the fabric on my shoulders he tells me, “I’m warning you now… I’ve done my best to remain steady, but if I start to slip I can’t promise that you’ll like who I become. Are you sure you still want to do this?”

My dress drops to the floor and his gaze roams my body.

I slowly lift up his shirt and pull him close. “It’s okay Suguru, I can take it.”

✦✧✸✧✦

Suguru grabs a fistful of my hair and pulls me into a fevered kiss. His body towers over me as I race to take off the rest of his clothes. When I make my way to his pants, I let my hand graze the length of his cock. He immediately hardens beneath me and the air takes another shift. The haze of blue swirls fade into red and his skin runs hot like fire.

I can barely pull down his slacks before he grabs my waist to pull me up against him. His skin is smooth, his chest is hard, and I can feel him brush against my center. When his strong grip takes a hold of my ass, I wrap my legs around him while he walks us to his room. 

He sets me on the bed and guides me down until my back presses against his sheets. The lights are off, but the red fog illuminates the room—allowing me to make out the contours of his body.

He looms over me and begins to rub my clit. I hum in pleasure and roll my head back.

“You’ve barely even touched me and I’m already breaking,” he growls. He takes another look at my body and I can feel the hunger in his eyes. “You are god damn beautiful.”

Suguru uncovers his cock, and I can feel my eyes widen. He’s big. And I mean big. As he tugs against it, I feel my eyes locking onto him—he’s mesmerizing.

“Is something the matter, princess?” he smirks. His brow arches like it’s a challenge. “Like you said… you can take it.”

I do my best to bite back a smile as my heart continues to race. The haze grows brighter around us.

Suguru lowers himself onto the bed, guiding himself into me. He stretches me so wide, forcing me to moan—but I know it’s only the tip. He continues to ease himself inside and I can’t help but gasp for air.

Once my walls adjust to his size, he grips my thighs and picks up his tempo. I can feel his whole length beat against my cervix. I cry in pleasure as my back arches and my eyes begin to shut.

“Eyes on me, baby girl. The whole time.” My eyes shoot open and see a fiendish smile dance across his face. “Now show me how much of a slut you can be.”

He moves one hand up my body, stopping to stroke my nipple, before landing on the edge of my neck. His fingers gently press on the sides of my throat, leaving just enough passage for air to flow through. His touch is violent, his voice is stern, but all of it has me dripping in delight.

My mind goes numb, registering only the feelings of pleasure and pain. I knew he was large, but the magnitude of his cock leaves me speechless. I keep my gaze fixed on him as he drives inside me, making me cry out louder each time. All I can make out is, “Fuck, Suguru.”

“That’s my girl. Louder,” he growls. “Let me hear how much you need me.”

My moans begin to amplify, but that only makes his thrusts go deeper. I don’t know who this Suguru is, but he tames me like an animal and fucks me like a beast. Everything about this makes me crave him so much more. My thighs clench at the thought, making the juices leave my body. “Fuck—that feels…so—good.” My words are breathy and labored.

“Your pussy is so tight. Fitting for a little slut like you.” He releases briefly and forcefully flips me over. As he grabs a fistfull of my hair to pull me close to his face, I feel him whisper. “Let’s see how well you can take me from behind.”

He keeps his grip wrapped in my hair, and my head presses into his chest. I feel his power surge through me as he pushes his way back inside. My center is so wet, he makes driving into me seem effortless. When he rams into the front of my walls, I feel myself squeeze around him.

Suguru releases my hair, but he wastes no time. His fingers move to hook into my mouth, leaving every part of my body filled. His other hand remains painfully gripped around my waist. I struggle to catch my breath when his pressure doesn’t let up.

“You feel so good, baby girl. I could fuck you forever.” The vibration of his voice tickles the side of my throat. His pace is steady but his movements are rough and relentless.

Every beat has me screaming in desire.

Suguru lets his hands trail from my mouth to my center and uses the wetness on his fingers to rub my clit. I’m overwhelmed with pleasure as I feel my folds throb against him. With my mouth free, he plants hungry kisses onto my lips and I can feel my body wanting to release.

His hips continue to strike into me, causing tears to well into my eyes. They fall down my cheek, but his tongue slowly cleans it up before he returns his mouth back to mine.

The pressure inside grows and I feel my climax calling for me. He’s so good. All of him feels so good. I can’t stop thinking about the way he looks, the way he feels, how perfect he is inside of me. “Please don’t stop, I’m—gonna—” I can barely speak, let alone breathe. “Come.”

“As my little slut should. Don’t worry, I’ve got you.” His breath quickens and the way his body moves tells me he’s close too. “Do you want me to come inside of you?”

I moan with pleasure and that’s the only confirmation he needs.

Suguru roars in desire, but the volume of my cry rivals him. I feel him release inside of me as tides of my orgasm flow through my body. My ears are ringing and my fingers go numb.

His come feels hot as it shoots up through me. As his grip tenses around me, I can feel them leaving bruises on my skin. He catches his breath and slowly glides his way out of me. I can feel his liquid dripping down my thighs.

I let myself settle back down onto the bed, feeling the remnants of my orgasm drift away.

Suguru adjusts himself so that his mouth hovers inches away from my ear. “Thank you for gracing me with that perfect little pussy.” he whispers.

No, Suguru. Thank you.

Chapter 7: Relax

The morning comes and the sun beams brightly through the windows. I wake up and see Suguru’s arm wrapped around me. His embrace gives me comfort, and I never want to let go. As I adjust myself to see his face, I notice how the rays of sun bounce off his back. The light illuminates the outline of his silhouette—he is truly an angel.

I think back last night—how raw, powerful, and commanding he was. But as I look at him now, I see that there’s no sign of the animal he once was. His eyes are softly shut, his mouth is calm, and his hair is gently swept across his face. I brush back the strands that have fallen, and place a delicate kiss on his cheek. With one last look of admiration, I slowly inch my way out of the bed to grab a glass of water.

“No, don’t go,” he softly groans. He’s half asleep, but his grasp pulls me right back next to him. He caresses the contours of my naked body, and I’m reminded of how good it feels to have his hands around me.

I let out a little chuckle, “I’m getting water, I’ll be right back.” I give him another kiss and he surrenders. I hear him grumble but he doesn’t fight back as I wiggle my way out of the bed.

I make my way through the living room, and back to the kitchen. Sunlight pours through the windows, unveiling the aftermath of our night. Our clothes are everywhere, the furniture is skewed, and the pillows from the couch have been dumped on the floor.

As I pick up the mess, I hear the door unlock and my heart immediately drops into my stomach. Fuck. I’m completely bare. Running back to the room would take too much time, so I race to put on the shirt that Suguru wore the night before. Who the hell is even at the…oh, it’s Satoru. I forgot they were roommates.

When I realize it’s Satoru, I feel my heart stop and a powerful rage fills me. I’m reminded of the anger, the horror, and the embarrassment I felt Friday afternoon. I thought I could look past it, but I let my emotions consume me.

As the door closes, I hear a vexing voice drifting my way. “Looks like someone had a little fun last night.”

I march up to him as the hems of Suguru's shirt brush against my knees. “What the hell is your problem, Satoru?”

He continues setting down his belongings. “For someone who looks like they had great sex, you seem a little feisty.” His tone is mellow, his grin is smug. It’s everything I hate about him. 

All I want to do is scream, but with Suguru asleep, my voice remains hushed. “One—yes, I did have great sex, thank you for noticing. But two—I’m furious with you. What happened on Friday? You literally just left me there.  And three—What is your problem? What kind of sick person does that?”

Satoru leans himself against the table. “Listen, angel. I did you a favor.”

I rush in front of him to block the noise from traveling too far. “Keep it down,” I snap at him.

Satoru picks himself up and takes a step towards me. His face hovers over me and I can feel my heart shudder. Our gaze latches onto each other as he softly whispers in my ear. “You seemed like you were enjoying yourself there, and trust me… while I would’ve loved to go further, I couldn’t take that away from Suguru.”

My arms cross and my stare remains unwavering. I scoff in his face. “You are so annoying. What makes you think I would ever let you have sex with me?”

“You wouldn’t?” He fires back quickly.

My jaw drops. I want to shoot back, but I’m at a complete loss for words. The hesitation is enough for his look to become even more self-assured.

He steps a bit closer and the heat from his body warms the air. “I’m just kidding angel. Although, I’m sure Suguru wouldn’t mind sharing.”

I push him back with enough force for him to bump the table. “Satoru!”

He makes his way around me and charges straight for the rooms. “You know what? We can just ask him about that right now. Hey Su—”

“Satoru, shut up!” I try to pull him back but his force is too strong.

A raspy voice emerges. “Good morning,” Suguru appears from the hallway leading to the room. He looks at us and breaks into a gentle laughter. “I guess some things never change with you two.”

He walks over to me, wrapping his hand around my waist to give me a kiss. “Nice shirt.”

My cheeks flush as I'm reminded that all I have on is Suguru’s oversized tee. I cling to him in embarrassment.

Satoru watches us move to the couch as he grabs a drink from the refrigerator. His brow perks up with interest. “This is new. Looks like you two had a fun night,” he calls from across the room.

I feel my eyes burn as I glare at him.

Suguru wraps his arm around me as a gesture of reassurance and I settle into his arms. “Satoru, relax. Don’t you have other women to fuck or bother? Leave mine alone.” He kisses me on the forehead and I look up at him with affection.

Satoru grabs his drink and strolls to his room. “Yes, your majesty,” he mocks Suguru lovingly. He turns to me with a sarcastic bow. “Sorry m’lady, please go about your day.”

I roll my eyes at him before directing my attention to Suguru. “How do you do that?” I ask curiously.

“Do what?” he replies.

“I don’t know, wrangle him? Satoru always listens to you.”

“I get him out of so many things, he basically owes me for life.”

“You’re always looking out for everyone, aren’t you?" I smile because this is the Suguru I know and love. Nothing about him could ever scare me away.

He turns to look at me like I’m the only person in the world. “But it’s only fun when I get to do it for you.”

✦✧✸✧✦

Our morning together is exactly what I hoped it would be. We spend a good bulk of our time preparing breakfast—grilling fish and whipping up tamagoyaki, just to scarf it down with a side of rice.

Unfortunately for me, Satoru joins us for the meal. However, I’m pleasantly surprised when he decides to keep the conversation tame. As much as I hate the guy, he’s not completely intolerable. We spend a few moments cracking jokes and I watch them playfully argue about who would win in a fight. As I look around the table, I smile. I’m overjoyed with the feelings of nostalgia that whip through my soul.

After we finish cleaning up our meal, Satoru heads back into his room while Suguru and I plop ourselves on the couch. He rests one elbow on the armrest, and the other around my shoulder. I snuggle myself into him and rest my head on his chest. He plants a kiss on my forehead and His eyes light up with his genuine smile.

I've shared many years of my life with Suguru, yet none of them have been quite like this. His cuddles comfort me, his kisses revive me, and his touch—well, his touch ignites me in ways I can’t describe.

“You know, I could stay like this forever,” I say to him.

“What do you mean?” His brow lifts.

“Being cuddled up against you. It’s the best feeling.” I smile because it’s true.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, this is great,” he begins. “But I can think of a couple more things that might feel better.” He moves from the armrest, letting his fingers graze my chest and dance down my body. He lifts up the hem of my shirt.

A jolt of arousal runs through me when I feel the pads of his fingers rub against my panties.

“Suguru!” I playfully push him off with a smile.

He raises his brow and smirks. “What’s wrong? Don’t think you can handle another round?”

“Satoru is right there,” I murmured, carefully keeping my voice down.

Suguru adjusts himself to get a better angle of my lips and presses his mouth against mine. “He can fuck off. Let him see.”

My attention is immediately averted when I hear a passing voice coming from the bathroom.

“I’m right here,” Satoru calls out as he crosses the opening in the hallway.

Without breaking the kiss, Suguru lifts his hand from me, and I shift my eyes to see his middle finger raised at Satoru. I chuckle.

Satoru returns to his room and shuts the door. Once we’re back to being alone, Suguru returns my kisses and focuses his attention back to my folds.

The pleasure rises as I feel his lips part and he slips his tongue into my mouth. He hums against my lips as his fingers gently rub my clit. No matter how many times he touches me, I still feel a rush. My body gets lighter as it drifts away, in search of euphoria and I mutter curses under my breath. I wish this feeling would never stop. My thighs begin to clench as I feel liquid form between them. This is so— 

Buzz. I hear his phone chime on the table. He silences it and stays fixated on me. 

Buzz. He tries to ignore it, hoping it will pass.

Buzz. He hesitates. Now completely distracted, he momentarily breaks away. “I’m so sorry. Do you mind if I take this real quick?”

I nod, moving from him so he can get up to take the call. I can’t really make out the conversation, but judging from his tone, it doesn’t seem great.

He hangs up the phone and shoots me with an apologetic smile, “Yaga needs me to help with some curse clean up, but it shouldn’t take long. I promise. Do you mind if I step away for a little bit?”

My brow furrows. “Why doesn’t he ever call for Satoru’s help?”

“For what it’s worth, he does call him. But have you met Satoru?”

“Yeah you’re right.” I remember our conversation from earlier. I get him out of so many things, he basically owes me for life. Damn you, Satoru. You owe him—or rather me, big time. I let out a sigh as disappointment washes over me.

Suguru gives me a soft kiss, though he knows that isn’t enough to satisfy the arousal between my legs. “I’m so sorry. Feel free so stay if you want, make yourself feel at home,” he starts. “It’s 12 right now, so I’ll probably be back in an hour—two hours, max. I promise.”

As he gathers himself together, Satoru approaches from his room and appears in the hallway crossing. He rests his arm on the edge of the frame and directs himself to Suguru. “Hey, I heard some shuffling, are you going somewhere?”

My eyes widen as I notice Satoru’s body stretched along the wall. He’s only wearing a pair of sweats while his top is completely bare. The sun from the windows hits the contours of his muscles, making his skin glisten. His white hair rests gently on his face as he tilts his head in curiosity. The blue in his eyes are centered on Suguru but the color still pierces my vision from afar.

My gaze goes from the top of the frame and travels down the length of Satoru’s forearms. It reaches the subtle curves of his bicep and slowly creeps down to the lines of his chest and the ridges of his abs. His build is lean, and his body is defined. My eyes slowly roam as they follow the lines of the V-shaped trail that leads right down to—fuck. Stop.

What am I doing?

I snap out of it and return to find myself plugged in mid-conversation.

“...I can go if you want,” Satoru finishes. 

Suguru continues to round up his things, but pauses to place an arm on Satoru’s shoulder and sighs. “I would love that, truly. But no offense, you’d probably get yourself into trouble. Yaga would just call me anyways to clean up your mess too.” He turns to me with a regretful look, pleading for forgiveness. “It’s just faster if I do it myself, I promise I’ll be quick.”

Satoru huffs as he rolls his eyes. “You’re right, but offense has still been taken.”

One more kiss and Suguru heads to the door. “Be a good mentor and take care of her while I’m gone. Try not to be an asshole.” His voice trails, but he stops momentarily to give me one last heartfelt smile. The door closes and my gut churns as I’m left staring at a shirtless Satoru.

Satoru lifts himself off of the frame and heads back to his room. Before the door shuts, he mockingly calls out, “Don’t worry angel, I’ll keep my hands to myself.”

I shake my head and let out an exasperated breath. Even when he’s being cordial, he still gets under my skin.

With Suguru gone, I’m unsure of what to do. My core still feels tight and there’s the lingering arousal between my legs. Satoru has locked himself in his room, so it feels like I have most of the apartment to myself. I use this as the perfect opportunity to draw myself a bath so I can finally relax. 

✦✧✸✧✦

Stepping into the tub, the immediate warmth cocoons me. It reminds me of being wrapped in Suguru’s embrace. I take a few moments to unwind, feeling the comfort of the water against my skin. My head rests on the edge of the tub as I close my eyes and let my mind drift…

Slowly…

Slowly…

Drift…

My vision jumps to Suguru as he hums into my breasts and teases my folds. His touch is warm and playful, but it’s no surprise that I long for more. The image in my mind is clear, but the feeling falls short. I let my hands slip between my thighs and let the gentle pressure of my fingers fuel my fantasy.

The image shifts, and I envision how Suguru’s frame completely overpowers me. His shoulders are wide, his muscles are thick, and I let my eyes trail down his beautiful body. The contours of his abs feel like steel, but his skin is smooth as his hips rock against me. My gaze reaches his cock and it’s already trickling in arousal.

He teases me, gently sliding the tip across my slit. I bite my lip to hold back my whimper. When he sees how needy I am for him, he guides his length into me and I feel him expand my walls. I let myself mimic the motions with my hands and a rush of pleasure flows through me.

Suguru grinds his hips, thrusting everything he has into me until my pussy is completely filled. The rhythmic motion leaves me dizzy and I can feel my vision beginning to blur. The tension inside me boils as I imagine the friction of his cock massaging me. All of his ridges compliment my own and I can feel myself drip with desire.

Suguru’s presence invades my thoughts and a moan escapes my breath. As I feel myself pulsate against the pressure of my fingers, a devilish voice drifts through my head. Though I can’t make out the voice, the thought just fuels my fire.

“He would tell you you’re soaking wet,” I continue working my clit until I’m on the brink of pleasure. I squirm as the tingles of my orgasm begin to peek over the horizon.

“He would say you’re god damn beautiful,” The words make my core flutter and my center continues to throb. I’m close, so close. The image in my head flips.

“Does he make you feel good?” Yes. So good. A vision of Satoru pounding into me resonates through my body. I’m about to—

“Yes, angel. Come for—” Fuck.

My eyes immediately shoot open when I realize the narrator of my thoughts. No, no, no, no. That did not just happen. I feel like I just woke up from a mortifying nightmare. But…if it’s a nightmare, then why do I still feel myself quiver? Stop.

I grab my towel and I shake my head to wipe away the image. As I let the bath drain, I find myself deep in thought. Why the hell is Satoru in my head and how do I get him out? I press my fingertips against my temples. Please just leave.

I try to collect myself, but memories of Friday with Satoru flood my brain. I get flashbacks of his fingers pressing into me and I immediately feel weak. I remember his tongue on my center and it makes my heart skip a beat. Stop. In my haste, I bolt out the door and collide into a large figure. 

I lift my head up to see Satoru standing before me. The warmth of his skin bounces off of me. “What the hell are you doing?” My voice is raised, but he doesn’t realize it’s because he invaded my thoughts. 

Satoru furrows his brow with one hand holding a towel around his waist, and the other raised up in defense. “Whoa, can’t I take a bath in my own house?”

My pupils dilate when I realize our towels are the only thing in between our bodies. It takes every bit of willpower to not let my eyes linger below his waist. I decide to keep my head down and swiftly maneuver past him. “Oh, right. Fine, just go ahead.” I get to the front of Suguru’s door, and my hand hovers over the knob.

Before I can turn it, Satoru calls out to me. “By the way, I noticed you were a little loud in there.” I try to move, but my body stands still. ”Were those moans for me?”

I’m frozen in shock. I tilt my head to see if his gaze is darting towards me—it’s not. Instead, all I see is his towel drop, but the door shuts before I can see it hit the floor. Nice ass—Stop.

My cheeks flush, my heart races, and I’m pretty sure my entire soul has left my body. How do I leave every interaction with Satoru feeling absolutely mortified?

Chapter 8: Repeat

Were those moans for me? No. Yes—I mean kinda? So what if they were? Fucking hell, this cannot be happening right now. Stupid Satoru and his stupid charm.

As I struggle to push the thoughts aside, I check the clock and it’s 12:30 pm. It’s only been thirty minutes since Suguru left. That’s okay, I can just relax in his room and avoid Satoru for the next hour and a half. I let out a groan and try to figure out my next move.

I set the towel down and look at my options for clothing—Suguru’s shirt from last night, dirty. The dress that I wore here, dirty. My panties sitting on the floor, soaked… and dirty. With my options limited, I settle for a fresh t-shirt from Suguru’s dresser, hoping he won’t mind. Similar to the last one, this one barely grazes my knees—but it’s cozy nonetheless.

I spend some time mindlessly scrolling away on my phone, until my stomach starts to growl—I haven’t eaten since breakfast. I tiptoe my way to the door and press my ear against the wood to see if there’s any sign of Satoru in the common space. It seems quiet, so I think the coast is clear—but of course, it isn’t.

Satoru is sitting at the dining table with his headphones in. He looks like he’s intently watching something on his phone. His hair is a bit wet, and he still hasn't gotten around to putting on a shirt. Can’t blame him though, it is his apartment after all. After a moment, he notices that I’ve stepped out of Suguru’s room and pauses the video to talk to me.

“Oh hey, you’re alive! I thought you were either masturbating, napping, or dead so I didn’t want to disturb you.”

I give him a half smile, spotting an unfinished plate of food resting in front of him. It reminds me why I went out in the first place.

“You’re probably hungry. Here, I can warm up something for you.” Before I can protest, he’s already up to grab me a plate, some chopsticks, and containers from the refrigerator.

“Oh okay, thanks.” Satoru hasn’t teased me yet. In fact, he’s actually being nice? So far so good. I take a seat at the table and try to figure out what’s playing on his phone. “What are you watching?”

“It’s this movie about some mad scientist who turns—”

“People into worms,” I help finish off his sentence.

He smiles. “Yeah, Human Earthworm 4. You know it? One of my students keeps pestering me to watch it. It’s messed up, but I actually think it’s kinda funny.”

“Yeah, I knew I recognized it! I’ve seen this one before and it’s pretty good. Unlike the others, this one feels more like a romance.” I reply with a laugh. 

After setting down my food, Satoru disconnects his headphones and moves his plate to the spot next to mine. He props his phone in between us and we spend the last 20 minutes of the movie eating our lunch, huddled closely together around his phone. His body heat radiates as our shoulders touch, sending a brief shock through me.

When we finish our meal, I wipe down the table while he washes the dishes in the sink. We laugh about the movie, share sentiments about the storyline, Satoru even comes up with theories on what Human Earthworm 5 would be like. In moments like this, I’m reminded of the times in our mentorship where we actually got along. This is nice—this Satoru is nice.

As I finish putting the last container back into the fridge, I hear him turn off the faucet. I turn around to see him dry his hands and lean on the edge of the counter. I can tell something in his demeanor has changed. His mouth opens to say something, but he decides to keep it shut.

“Is everything okay?”

He looks away, scratching the back of his head as if he’s nervous to speak. “So, you never answered my question.”

“What question?”

“Your bath. Your moans. Were they—”

I immediately cut him off while my eyes roll, and my shoulders drop. I was hoping he wouldn’t bring it up, but I should’ve known better. All Satoru wants to do in life is get under my skin. “I really don’t understand you. I know you’re capable of being a nice and normal human being, so why do you insist on antagonizing me like this?”

He takes a step forward, like it’s a challenge. “You’re not denying it, so I can’t be completely wrong.”

My mouth twitches open, but I hesitate. I guess I’m not denying it.

Satoru moves another inch closer, causing me to take a small step back. His powerful presence is all I can feel. His velvety tone delivers his words nice and slow. “Do you want to know the beauty of the Six Eyes, angel? It means that I can see everything.”

I feel the heat rush to my cheeks and I take in a sharp breath. Everything? What does he mean by everything? “Wh—What are you talking about?” I stammer.

His words are paced and methodical. “I see the way your cursed energy changes every time I walk in the room.”

There’s silence.

“...I can see the way it gravitates towards me when I rest on the doorframe, and the way it struggles to hold your gaze up when I’m wrapped in a towel.”

The sound of my heart fills the room.

“...I see the way it vibrates when you try to get a glimpse of my ass.”

My jaw drops open, but nothing comes out.

“...And I definitely see it sync with your heartbeat whenever I whisper in your ear.”

His hand grazes my shoulder while the other gently caresses my waist. I let him. My gaze locks onto his and I’m completely hypnotized.

Satoru slowly leans down and stops until his face is next to mine. “You want me, angel.”

I stiffen my spine, in hopes of him seeing that I won’t back down. But who am I kidding? I’ve already been caught in his trap. As I take in the scent of his freshly bathed body, I feel myself gush between my thighs. In that instant, I’m reminded that my only piece of clothing is an oversized shirt. “So what if I do?”

Satoru smiles, gently pinning me against the refrigerator. He places his forehead on top of mine and can feel his gaze burn through me. “Do you remember the rules I told you about on your first day back?”

One—If you want me, don’t want me.

Two—If you need me, don’t need me.

Three—If you need my help, help yourself first.

I let him lift my chin and gently kiss my lips. “I think they were for me more than they were for you. Because right now, I want you too.” 

When I kiss him back, I feel his touch become more needy. I haven’t said a single word, but he knows my actions speak louder. He grabs my waist and flips me around so that my hips are pinned against his counter, allowing him to go deeper into the kiss. His grip is demanding, desperate to feel every bit of my body.

“I played nice and let Suguru have his fun, but I’m telling you right now—I need you.” He briefly pulls away and I see a rush of desire filling his hungry eyes. “So please angel, help me.”

I direct one of his hands to the bulge of his pants and the other underneath my shirt and in between my legs.  “How about you help yourself first.”

“No panties? Angel, you’re making this way too easy.” Satoru tugs down his pants to reveal his cock, stroking it as he teases my folds. He drops his forehead onto my shoulder and I hear him groan as he pleases himself. The size of his length is enough to make me gasp. I watch his large hands tug on it before my vision is blocked by Satoru pressing his lips into mine.

My arms stretch back onto the counter and I can feel the coolness of the sink spike through my fingers. My head rolls back and the rays of sunlight blind me as Satoru kisses his way down my neck.

“I always thought you were a good girl,” he growls in my ear. “I never expected you to prove me wrong.”

The words send shivers down my spine and I immediately tangle my fingers into his hair. He slides his fingers inside of me and my slick oozes out onto his hands. I feel the warmth of his pads, the ridges of his knuckles, I feel everything. He glides himself in and out, and the pressure instantly makes my walls convulse.

He continues to jack himself off and his breath becomes labored. The warmth in his breath hugs me as his kisses move back to my mouth. He’s desperately clinging to my lips and I can hear his groans as I tug on his hair.

He breaks away, panting, leaving our faces inches from each other. “Do you want to know the real reason I left that day?” he reveals. 

My gaze locks onto his beautiful blue eyes.

“If I stayed, I would’ve wanted more. I would’ve dropped my limitless and it would be over.” Satoru slows down the pace of his fingers, and I feel myself dripping down on him with excitement. I guide the rest of his pants off and he gently lifts off my shirt.

The softness of his skin roams my body, leaving a trail of fire within me. When his hands are done searching, he drags them up to cup my face. “I left because… If I had the chance to feel you, and I mean really feel you, I would’ve fucked you until your legs give out.”

My mouth twitches and I raise my brow to challenge him. “Prove it.”

Before I can even think, Satoru’s hands race to grab a hold of my thighs. He lifts me up until my elbows are resting on the counter and my feet are off the floor. His grip is powerful as he drives his cock straight into me. No easing, no adjusting, just pure thrusting. I immediately throw my head back and moan in sincere delight, knocking over the dish rack behind me.

His hands venture over to my ass, squeezing so hard like he wants to milk every last bit of me. I don’t mind the bruises as long as it showers me with bliss. The pounding of his hips against mine reverberates through the entire room. All I hear is our moans mix with groans and he’s fucking me senseless like a messy symphony of pleasure and pain. 

As his cock drills into me, I feel my back ache as he presses me into the counter. The edges dig into me, but the arousal between my legs overpowers it all. “Fuck.”

When Satoru notices, he eases his stroke to pick me up, and carries me to the table. “Maybe this will be a little more comfortable for you.”

I feel my cheeks touch the surface and slowly lower my back onto the wood. Satoru picks up one of my legs and throws it over his shoulder. Once he settles, he resumes pace and doesn’t let up. Whatever angle he has me at has his cock ramming directly into the sensitive spot in my pussy. I struggle to find a grip on the table, causing the vase of faux plants to crash. 

“Angel, you are so tight.” His words have my moans growing louder by the second. How can I be an angel when Satoru fucks me like he’s the god damn devil?

His pace slowly increases and I feel my orgasm works its way to my core. “S—so close.”

Satoru removes his hold from my waist and brings his fingers to his mouth. He wraps his lips around them, before placing them on my clit. The initial shock stuns me, causing my walls to contract. He works with an even pressure, smearing all of my slick around me. The vibrations of his fingers build up inside of me and I can feel my body on the brink of release. He gives one last thrust, knocking down a chair and shaking the table, and I immediately crumble.

My orgasm shoots out from my core, down my legs, and through my toes. I let out a moan but it feels like my cry can be heard from miles away. The pleasure overtakes me and a rush of ecstasy floods my brain. My eyes snap shut, my body tenses, but as my orgasm fades, I wonder if I just died and got railed to heaven.

Satoru falls over me, panting hard to catch his breath. He lifts his head and curls his mouth into a smile. I return his smile with a complementary chuckle.

I slowly prop myself up when suddenly, a voice suddenly emerges from the hallway. “Satoru, you cheeky little bastard. When I said take care of her, I didn’t mean it like that.” Fuck. Suguru.

My mind goes blank and I can’t even move. Satoru’s head perks up as he turns to face Suguru. The air is tense and the silence lingers for far too long. Time slows down and it feels like no one has moved in what feels like hours. As I focus my attention on Suguru, I’m puzzled to see the reaction on his face. I fully expect anger and rage, but it’s…not?

“Hey, I—” Satoru starts.

Suguru lifts up his brow and the side of his mouth twitches into a smirk. “Well, are you going to let me join, or am I just gonna sit here and watch?”

As my eyes widen, Satoru turns his head back towards me. “See angel, I told you he wouldn’t mind sharing.”

Read Part 3 Here

#anime smut #jjk smut #gojo x reader #geto x reader #gojo satoru #geto suguru #gojo smut #geto smut #jjk fanfic #gojo x you #gojo x y/n #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x y/n #gojo satoru x female reader #gojo #jujustu kaisen #jjk gojo #jjk gojo satoru #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #gojo scenario #gojo imagine #gojo fanfiction #gojo fic #geto fic #geto fanfiction #jjk geto suguru

[twig-tea]

Final Thoughts on To Be Continued

Ok, I know I was loudly still mad at this show last week in @respectthepetty's notes, who was very kind (and even encouraging) about it. @happypotato48 talked me down a bit by suggesting there was more in the novel that might still come, and he was right! This week we got an explanation that helped me find the through-thread that was missing between the flashbacks and the start of the show, so I can let that go. I was pretty satisfied with that part of this week's finale overall, and was really glad that they added that connecting piece for me.

Short non-spoilery version of where I landed: I was skeptical it was going to land the core storyline, but for me it did. I liked it in the end, but there are a number of hurdles to enjoying this show so I wouldn't recommend this without caveats (mostly related to pacing).

With all of that being said, it's one of the better pulps this year so far, and worth a watch if you love mutual pining, don't mind slow episodes, and enjoy when a show lets its characters make mistakes. I'm glad I watched it.

For anyone curious about this show, here's where this show worked for me, and where it didn't. Spoilers under the cut!

What I Liked

I really enjoyed Ji getting to be petty to Achi at the beginning of the series, and the way the show made clear that Ji knew exactly how conflicted he was about Achi showing up in his life again.

I love yearning, and the yearning in this series was top-notch. The way Ji could not help himself when it came to accepting Achi's overtures, and the way Achi used his overtures to say over and over again "I know you; I know us; I am willing to put in effort to prove I mean it" was delicious.

I did like the flashbacks and how they were doled out through the series to add context and explain what was happening. The timing of the flashbacks in the story was well done and gave us the info we needed when we needed it.

I liked how clear consent was in this show, and how consent alone did not result in a perfect scenario, especially as kids. I did appreciate how the main conflict from the past was essentially teenage boys did not know how to communicate and blew everything out of proportion/did not understand how to think about things from the others' perspective.

And from this last episode, I liked how the show let us see that years of reflection helped Achi realize what things must have felt like from Ji's perspective, and once he had confirmation that Ji was devastated when he left, it makes sense that he would be able to meet up with Ji again with both confidence and contrition in order to get the reconciliation he wants. I also really liked the contrast in the sex scenes between their first time when they didn't kiss for most of the scene and their first time as boyfriends where they can't seem to stop kissing.

Finally, I love competence, and I really enjoyed getting to see Ji be a competent surgeon and Achi be good at his job managing fan expectations of his personal life. Achi handled the relationship reveal with confidence knowing he'd be able to manage the fallout, and his manager was supportive once he was sure Achi actually had a plan.

What I Didn't Like

I seriously considered dropping this show after episode 4 because for the first little while, every other episode really dragged. It wasn't the order in which the story was doled out that was the issue, but there was so much unnecessary footage and scenes lingered too long within each episode. In short, there were moments when this show draaaaaaagged. So in terms of who it works/doesn't work for, having patience for really slow pacing within an episode is critical. It does pick up a bit after ep4, but never fully gets over this problem.

Egregiously in a show where some episodes felt too long, the show also didn't use the time it had to fully close off all the threads it started and some of the plots felt rushed. There was a redemption arc for Ji's father that felt incomplete/sudden to me (not to say people can't snap out of a 10-year depression but I wasn't really given any chance to feel much about this because we didn't really sit with him or his kids after it happened); the side characters' romance felt like it barely got off the ground (they honestly had the time, they just didn't use it), and Poppy's romance and career trajectory also barely got any time (this one is more forgivable as a third and het couple).

Beyond the multiple pacing issues, the acting was also shaky, and while the sex scenes are well staged and cut to hide this, they were a little awkward together during some of the moments of physical intimacy.

For my taste, I would have wanted to see more of the characters working on things and changing their behaviour; a lot of the push-pull in the middle of the series felt circular rather than progressive. Some of it was necessary: Achi did demonstrate he will stick around no matter how hard Ji makes it this time, and Ji did show that he can open up and be vulnerable with Achi eventually, and trust him when there are external threats. But I would have liked to have seen more of the parts that led to the change in them happen. They also spend a lot of time falling into old habits when they started hanging out together again, which was charming and realistic, but I would have loved to see more incorporation of their new lives. Achi basically takes a break from stardom to woo Ji, so we don't get a real sense of what their relationship will be like except in the finale which is quite brief.

I already gave my high-level summary above the fold: TL; DR I'm glad I watched but not everyone will enjoy this one.

#to be continued the series #bl meta #typed so that i can stop thinking it

[arcanusarchieves-if]

Can you share a snippet of your writing please? It doesn't have to be from the game but I'm just a bit curious!

Sure! Here's a (very short and completely unedited) flashback scene that I wrote that didn't end up making the final cut. It takes place back when MC was at school so it has a few characters that you won't recognize!

It begins with pain and ends with darkness.

You came back into reality just as you had left it (“Well not exactly as you had left it” the ache in your bones reminds you softly), unsure and exhausted, with the light blinding your unopened eyes. The urge to open them briefly crosses your mind but the thought of having to put actual energy towards anything quickly turned that desire into nothing more than a passing thought.

“You still alive, mate? I don’t have a eulogy written up quite yet so if you could hold out just a bit longer I’d really appreciate it.”

Alistair’s teasing words fall over you like a soothing balm, the familiar sound of his voice sinking into your skin like a long-lost friend. It was admittedly an overdramatic thought if not a ridiculous one - most of the time you and the rest of your friends couldn’t get him to shut the hell up. Still, there was something comforting about the fact that he stayed despite…everything (“despite you” says someone that sounds very much like yourself).

“It happened again, didn’t it?”

A beat passes after your words. Then another one. And one soon after that. Eventually though…

“…yeah, it did. It wasn’t that bad this time though. Nothing got destroyed - nothing that can’t be replaced, that is.”

So you didn’t hurt anyone. That’s always a bonus. Still there were some lingering questions.

“…where’d we end up?”

Another beat, then another voice. Soft and Uncertain. Fearful but Unwaveringly Fond.

“Not too far from the academy, thank the lord. Erm we’ll still need to use a teleportation spell though. One of us can do it for you if you’re not up to it.”

The thought of casting any magicae after what just happened was a (“terrifying” the voice mocks) miserable thought. Still you give a swift shake of your head, forcing your eyes open as you do so. The blue of the sky meets your gaze but a quick series of blinks reveals it to just be Lena's eyes - you knew if you turned to the other side you’d meet the familiar green of Alistair’s. You push yourself up pretending it isn’t odd to think about your friends’ eyes with such intensity.

Lena offers you a shaky but not uncertain (and never ever fearful) hand, and with strength that you’re surprised you still have, you take it gratefully, pulling yourself to your feet - stretching out aching bones and wobbly knees. Alistair grins at you from where he sits nearby, his expression a mix of relief and amusement.

"Welcome back to the land of the living," he says, reaching out to clap you on the shoulder. "Or whatever passes for it, considering the circumstances."

You scoff and then snort. A lurking shadow in the background catches your eye and something like amusement and annoyance stumbles into your bones and out of your lips. Some would call it a laugh. You’d call it an experienced reaction to the person in front of you.

“What, you're not happy to see me? Here I am, spending my very precious time making sure you don’t destroy anything during one of your little fits, and you go ahead and laugh at me. Honestly, where’s the appreciation I deserve?”

Caspian’s voice is arrogant. It’s snarky. It’s even cruel in some ways. But it’s also so loyal. So fond. (“Of you” a voice says softly. It’s the same one as before but it’s also so so different).

You try to think of a witty response but eventually give up, deciding to focus your energy on leaning against Lena for support, the memories of the recent blackout begin to flood back. It was a close call this time, with your magicae threatening to spiral out of control once again. The fear of causing irreversible damage always looms over you like a dark cloud, but having your friends by your side eases the burden, if only slightly. (“But how long can this really last?” the thing you're trying to ignore asks).

#writing snippet #scene #flashback #answered #anon ask #ask #author: oracle #character: mc #ro: Caspain #arcanus archives #Arcanus

[ape-apocalypse]

Road To The Kingdom - Firestorm Tie-In Novel

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes: Firestorm is a prequel novel written by Greg Keyes for the second movie in the reboot trilogy. It takes place soon after the end of the first film, about a week after the apes escaped into the redwood forest beyond San Francisco and the Simian Flu began to cut through the human race. This novel is a fantastic bridge between Rise and Dawn, giving us more insight into characters we met in the first movie who will feature in the next, as well as fleshing out the fall of society. 

The book does very well juggling between the two massive plots of Caesar's apes avoiding their human hunters and the Simian Flu tearing through the city. Though we don't see Will or any other humans we met in Rise, they give us many new human characters: a reporter trying to make the connection between the escaped apes and the new virus, an emergency room doctor dealing hands on with outbreak casualties, and an ape researcher and a former hunter who have been brought in by Gen-Sys to capture Caesar's group. While I thought I wouldn't care about the humans because the apes are always my favorite characters, all these humans in different locations and with different stories keep the story from dragging; I ended up enjoying the final days of humanity almost as much as Caesar's story. The book also gives us the first introduction to a human character who will become important in Dawn: Dreyfus, the leader of the human colony played by Gary Oldman. Going into the movie, his backstory isn't very clear other than he was in some position of power before the end and he lost his wife and children. But the book goes really deep into his story of a former police chief running for mayor and wanting to protect humans. Rereading the book in 2024, the parallels of the Simian Flu with the Covid outbreak definitely rings true (much like the YouTube shorts).

But no matter how good the human characters are, what I enjoyed most about this book was seeing Caesar and his escaped apes start to adapt to life in the wild. Even while they're being hounded by the humans chasing them, they have to figure out how to care for sick/injured apes and where to get food without humans to feed them. A great moment for Caesar is when he thinks to himself that he never thought beyond escaping from the human city; his realization that there is more to figure out than just dodging humans shows how he goes from accidental ringleader from the sanctuary to the wise authoritative leader of the apes of the next two films.

Though surprisingly, the true star of this book isn't Caesar; it's Koba. We get numerous detailed flashbacks of Koba's life before ending up in the Gen-Sys lab and receiving the brain enhancing drugs. From the death of his mother to being an abused TV star to arriving at the labs as a test ape. In the films, Koba's hatred of humans shines through and is unquestionable; you don't need the backstory to understand why he carries a grudge against all humanity. But reading the details really did break my heart. And getting his backstory revealed as he learns to work with other apes, as he proves his loyalty to Caesar by rescuing injured apes rather than wrecking vengeance on humans, you actually have hope that he could be happy now that he was free with other apes. 

Another great part of the book is getting to see the very beginning of Caesar and Cornelia's courtship. Since one of my disappointments with the films are the forgotten female characters, I was glad to see Cornelia here, challenging Caesar's orders when it came to taking care of injured apes. Though her role is still small, I liked seeing her get a little time to flesh out her character.

Firestorm is officially labeled as a prequel (which is why I have it listed first as I'm trying to go in chronological storyline order), but I actually enjoyed reading it after seeing Dawn. While I think it can still be appreciated in any order, I liked getting to meet Koba in the movie and seeing him as a great complicated villain, before then learning his backstory and growing your sympathy for him, while also thinking about how tragic it is that he couldn't let go of his hate. Whatever order you decide to read them in, Firestorm by Greg Keyes is a wonderful expansion on the movies that I would label as required reading for fans for the expansive and enjoyable story it shares.

Intro / Previous / Next

#dawn of the planet of the apes #rise of the planet of the apes #planet of the apes #war of the planet of the apes #war for the planet of the apes #kingdom of the planet of the apes #reboot pota #pota #firestorm #novel #caesar #koba #prequel #greg keyes #andy serkis #mine #chimpanzee #chimp

[moiraineology]

Hi ❤️ I was wondering, how did you like New Spring if you've finished reading it?

Personally I think it was a great choice to read it even before getting into the Eye of the World and I enjoyed all the details about Moiraine, Siuan and Lan's backgrounds/relationships. It made reading EotW even a little easier to me. The only complain I have is that it was too short 🥲

BTW do you have any favorite parts that you'd like to see as flashbacks on the show?! I would love to get a scene of Moiraine and Lan meeting for the first time or their first bonding!

Oh no! I am so, so sorry for not replying sooner. I really didn't mean to leave you hanging. I was excited to receive this question, and then neglected to respond for...two weeks? Oh boy. I apologize.

I did truly love New Spring. Ripped through it in a couple of days over my reading break (a highlight!). I actually totally agree with you re: reading order. I'm not particularly stringent about that in any case, but I say, if you most ardently adore enjoy a character, just dive in and read everything ever directly written about them :D

It has now been a while since I read it, but I think that most of all I appreciated these very flawed, smart, and funny characters it brought to life. I've mentioned this before in a post, but I'll say it again as many times as possible: I love (love! LOVE) Mo's social ineptitude. Or at least that she treats most social interactions like a dramatic performance, where she has to put on a certain face based on her training and her upbringing. I find the part of the book where she learns about power structures in the Blue Ajah, and the fact that she picks up on this complicated dance of deference and authority that someone (Eadyth?) must then explain verbally, to be incredibly moving. Who among us hasn't felt the temperature of an intricate web of social relations, not natural but cultural (or maybe a combination of the two, where difference is felt and ostracized accordingly, sometimes in a very insidious and subtle way) and been utterly confused, and wished that someone would just explain what the fuck is going on between people? All of this says a lot about her background: culture, class, and also her particular brand of neurosis. I find it very endearing and more relatable than I care to admit (outside of this space). Yeah, also I think she's autistic. I'm nd as all hell and I think so, so it must be true.

Also, I love that we get mean Mo. Impatient Mo. Stubborn, obstinate, and immature Mo. She really did grow up with Lan. I think that's gorgeous. These two are actually kids when they meet, and then it's just them for 20 years on the road, and they learn to be PEOPLE, and to not communicate, and to fulfil the roles that are required of them/all that their duty really entails/how to navigate the politics of their world. Just the two of them. I would kill for flashbacks to times after they initially bonded, and how they were able to grow so close after a rather sticky beginning. I think the answer lies in the empathy that is inherent in a bond. Lan sees Mo as a stubborn child, but when he finally feels the fear and doubt and uncertainty she struggles with every day... a child doesn't normally feel those things. She struggles with the weight of the responsibility that has suddenly been thrust upon her, a responsibility that, to her great credit, she approaches bravely and willingly. Mo, too, can't stand Lan at first (I personally think she is jealous of his gravitas and his calm: we know she wants to be that way, but can't yet. Not until she grows up a little more), but she will soon meet the man who has been raised from birth to be the king of a nation that no longer exists. And what that does to a person. And exactly why Lan must be the way that he is (and how much she can learn from him). Also, I actually cried laughing and just gleefully clapped and giggled when Mo was pranking Lan and her inner voice was just...so conniving and sneaky and clever. "He would meet the wasps in perfect health." I genuinely think it's the funniest line ever written (perhaps that says more about my dumb sense of humour than RJ's comedic ability, but to his credit, he is really fucking funny sometimes).

And I can't end my little rant without talking about Siuan. I so appreciated the chance to get to know this character, who is introduced so beautifully to us in the show at the height of her power. As someone who is more than a little bossy, strategic, and clever, and who is very accustomed to being in control of a room. I love seeing what that looks like in a young person. She has the confidence, personality, and work ethic, but not yet the experience to be an effective leader. However, she leads Moiraine. And Moiraine likes it and she lets her. Again, relatable. More than I care to admit outside of this space. I also am fascinated by the cultural and class differences between the two women. The qualities they share (curiosity, drive, ambition, and so, so much integrity) are almost outweighed by those differences (Siuan is measured where Mo is impulsive, Siuan is frugal where Mo spends lavishly, Siuan is irreverent and unconstrained by the expectations of her rank, while Mo is and has always been bound by them). It's cool to see how they change one another. And the ways in which they remain unchanged into adulthood. Right up until we meet them together in the show. Also I think it's really fucking cute that Moiraine wanted to sugar momma Siuan so bad that she tried to buy her a horse. Who?? among us?? hasn't lived that fantasy?? No? Just me? (I would love to sugar momma my baby girl, if only I had the means).

Will you tell me what you thought about it, too? I would love to hear all of your thoughts. What would you like to see explored in the show?

Thank you so much for your thoughtful asks. I love answering them, even when I take too long.

#wot book spoilers #moiraine damodred #siuan sanche #lan mandragoran #fishwives #siuanraine #wot on prime #moiraine x siuan #moiraine and lan #new spring spoilers #wot meta #i guess?

[boyfridged]

What is your opinion on the Arkham Knight version of Jason

i have to say that I’ve never watched the full walkthrough nor played the game, but I did watch fragments and read the comics (although that was some years ago), so this is what my opinion is based on. &also there are things that i don’t enjoy about it, like the militia and aesthetics that comes with it, but fash undertones are present in so many batman titles, i’m not going to get into it right now.

i would like to say that i’m quite ambivalent, but that’s a lie because i usually have a soft spot for all jason iterations, even if they are very far off from the original characterisation and even perpetuate stereotypes that i can’t stand in canon. and that is, i think, for the most part, the case with arkham jay, an elseworld characterisation that might have even inspired the mainstream red hood comics a bit too much… especially that the arkham universe seems to be much darker and hopeless.

needless to say, I don’t like it in the main continuity, but for that title i didn’t mind it. if anywhere, pieces of media like that are the place to explore these themes.

two things i find interesting:

pre-robin/robin jay: something that is central to my reading of canon jason is his kindness and dedication to the world. this is attitude that ak jason is many ways definitely lacks. he is sensitive of course & motivated by desire to protect the innocent, but he is already cynical before he even gets to become robin.  it makes sense if you consider he’s older than jay when we first meet him in the main continuity, and that ak jay’s circumstances are much worse from the beginning (which is something i don’t appreciate that much tbh. you know i love willis & i don’t like this portrayal of gotham nor the crime alley specifically; not even sure if they call it in game/ak comics the same either). ak jay doesn’t give up (which i love), but he is already much more vidincative and has more of this somber determination. in batman and red hood comics flashbacks bruce sometimes mentions that jason “always” treated crime-fighting like a “game” – and this rings more true for ak jay than it ever did for 80s robin jason. i’d say ak!jay does treat life as a game because he knows that to an extent, it is one – and he is already on a disadvantaged position, which is why he’s willing to play dirty in the field. it’s a gritty take and much less mature and empathetic than what we get in og jason storylines. there’s def something captivating in this unromantic approach – hence its popularity even with rh retcons & fanon, but i'm more willing to accept it here than on earth prime. the way we can choose to believe that maybe robin could affect it and let him work him through his grievances with the world, only for it this chance to get completely crushed.

ak!jason: this is the universe in which jason gets to actually blame bruce for abandoning him (as a result of psychological torture, of course, but he still does), and in which he seeks revenge on him specifically. it’s interesting to see it unfold since in in comics it makes only for a short episode in the lost days for jay. (however, ngl, i also find it interesting that so many fans who are obsessed with jason being autonomous and responsible for all of his actions seem to adore this take.)

so, tldr, i guess while i do like this version of jason, he’s also basically a stereotype of og jason and everything i don’t want comics jason to be, which is a bit ironic. but there is some good storytelling in there and nice panels in ak: genesis.

and ngl i do like the monicker & his design. perhaps more than the red hood one even.

#this was asked before so this is a copy-paste from my old blog! #outbox

[alitgblog]

"live" blogging s7, vol 1 (some analysis, some jokes lol)

first off, I totally forgot there were other casa amor girls so opening the app to see them on the banner I was like oooo

the S7 MC isn't too bad art wise, like it's definitely better than I thought with the preview, but

I do think the skinnier size MC is super skinny and the bigger one is not that much bigger, which is a little disappointing (always appreciate more size inclusion). ideally I think there would be one more size up i think but I do understand that means they'd have to fix all the clothes 3 times.

speaking of clothes they've always been bad at the beginning of the season since like s4 and this is no exception. I wish we got more options in the beginning and then the others they tack on later

the skin tones really are only three shades with each having one warmer variation, which is kind of nice to have people get that option in tone, but I do still wish there were more shades variation in between (and darker ones in general)

for absolutely no reason I have decided that my MC is also gonna be the S5 MC from my first playthrough getting a second chance after a second failed relationship with Suresh (let's just pretend she didn't win her season lol) and she's cute in this style (but again i wish we had the right skin tone for her). I guess if fusebox is backing out of bringing back Eddie then I'm bringing my MC

Her name is Junie and she's doing a lot better now mentally and has gained a little bit of healthy weight and finally loves herself now so fusebox better not make an embarrassment out of her again.

this actually works out pretty well bc usually the casa amor girls on the show arrive at the same time unless something is special about one of them who can show up separately like MC does here (ok fine I've only seen that happen in LI USA S5 and I guess s6 of the game)

Ep 1

Bonnie being an LI feels solely like penance for me thinking Iona was hot but sad she wasn't even a friend really let alone an LI in s3 so thank you but for narrative purposes I'm making Junie straight

Uma is gorgeous

also fusebox is not beating the reused assets allegations even those poses are just too eerily familiar

"I wanna try the slow burn" *has war flashbacks to the Ozzy route I never finished*

short king raf

ok Alex picking MC when Summer was flirting so hard is actually very funny to me

I understand bc it's a gem choice i didn't pick that we didn't get the last card but very funny that they were like we're just not gonna give Summer a chance at all actually

Let's goooo confirmed Joyo is Indonesian (I'm filipino so i was hoping filipino so I could draw him singing karaoke but I am here for any southeast Asian representation at all 🥳)

however I am upset with the use of "rizz" again. maybe once or twice but if they do it again I'm rioting

Alex nerding out is so cute. also who wouldn't want a bob the builder boyfriend for home improvement projects lol

am i too old to understand what normcore is?? like I barely understand e-girl aesthetic but there's more??

Bryson and his sister Jess have the most realistic sibling relationship from the last two seasons bc I also would mess with my brother's partners. and I once again am mourning the idea of a protective brother slow burn storyline in s6 instead of whatever Amelia was doing

"I won't bore you with the details" no pls do it I wanna know and I don't wanna pay the gems

all the guys have great personalities so far and idk if it's because I'm paying attention more this time or it's just better but oh no I'm falling for all of them

the drama set up with the guys and their partners is promising writing (namely the triangle with Geri, Bryson, and Joyo but maybe just because im torn between those two anyway) I'm shocked but cautious it's episode 1 lol

ep 2

early doors?

the gem party outfit is so 2013 disney channel, I actually will be taking the free outfit

wait why is it not night time for truth or dare why did they change clothes lol

joyo, get out of here with the graphic tee and blazer combo. Maybe this is why Bryson doesn't like you, and it'd be justified (tbf him being a bad dresser has been established already though)

oh God I didn't see his pants too jfc let him borrow some clothes

I'm into the frenemy relationship with Summer, like there's always a female villain in the game and they're almost always entertaining to me at the beginning (minus maybe Kat and Ivy)

I'm warming up to the all the guys like how can you pick

I'm starting to realize I personally have a problem because I always go, at least initially, for the chefs/foodies (Jake, Bobby, Camilo, Roberto) and I like Bryson rn and I think my MC would go for Bryson based on how I played her in s5 but I'm slowly inching over to Joyo and honestly i see the vision for Bobby clone I mean Raf and it is absolutely bc they've mentioned cooking

stop talking about feet pls not again

I expect this from Summer but Uma coming over to try to steal my man?? I appreciate her boldness though and at least she's not going behind anyone's back

ep 3

as someone who doesn't have the modded app and will not pay real money for gems, I feel very happy with choosing to eavesdrop on the guys' conversation. I feel like usually a lot of the gem scenes aren't worth it but this one is fun

Joyo does skincare but can't dress and Bryson is a fashion expert but makes fun of skincare. If they joined forces they'd be unstoppable, thank God they hate each other

hey what the fuck happened to cassius

so in summary im pleasantly surprised and hyped for this season at the moment. and lastly, pls don't drop the ball on stick or twist again please please pleaseeee

#litg liveblogging #sorta #litg s7 #litg stick or twist #personal

[yvtro]

Hi! I apologize if this has already been asked and answered many times, I couldn't find if that is the case.

But I would love to hear what you think of Jason in the Arkham Knight video game? Do you like him? Thank you and again, I'm sorry if this is redundant :(

disclaimer: i’m moving blogs. still here to go through my askbox, but you will find me at @boyfridged from now on.

first, i have to say that I’ve never watched the full walkthrough nor played the game, but I did watch fragments and read the comics (although that was some years ago), so this is what my opinion is based on. (also there are things that i don't enjoy about it, like the militia and aesthetics that comes with it, but fash undertones are present in so many batman titles, i'm not going to get into it right now)

i would like to say that i'm quite ambivalent, but that's a lie because i usually have a soft spot for all jason iterations, even if they are very far off from the original characterisation and even perpetuate stereotypes that i can’t stand in canon. and that is, i think, for the most part, the case with arkham jay, an elseworld characterisation that might have even inspired the mainstream red hood comics a bit too much... especially that the arkham universe seems to be much darker and hopeless.

needless to say, I don’t like it in the main continuity, but for that title i didn’t mind it. if anywhere, pieces of media like that are the place to explore these themes.

two things i find interesting:

 - pre-robin/robin jay: 

something that is central to my reading of canon jason is his kindness and dedication to the world. this is attitude that ak jason is many ways definitely lacks. he is sensitive of course, but he is already cynical before he even gets to become robin.  it makes sense if you consider he’s older than jay when we first meet him in the main continuity, and that ak jay's circumstances are much worse from the beginning (which is something i don’t appreciate that much btw! i don’t like this portrayal of gotham nor the crime alley specifically; not even sure if they call it in game/ak comics that). ak jay doesn't give up (which i love), but he is already much more vidincative and has more of this somber determination. in batman and red hood comics flashbacks bruce sometimes mentions that jason "always" treated crime-fighting like a "game" – and this rings more true for ak jay than it ever did for 80s robin jason. i'd say ak!jay does treat life as a game because he knows that to an extent, it is one – and he is already on a disadvantaged position, which is why he's willing to play dirty in the field. it's a gritty take and much less mature and empathetic than what we get in og jason storylines, but i do not dislike it. there's def something captivating in this unromantic approach, and the way we can choose to believe that maybe robin could affect it and let him work him through his grievances with the world, only for it this chance to get completely crushed.

ak!jason:

this is the universe in which jason gets to actually blame bruce for abandoning him (as a result of psychological torture, of course, but he still does), and in which he seeks revenge on him specifically. it's interesting to see it unfold since in in comics it makes only for a short episode in the lost days for jay.

so, to summarise, i guess while i do like this version of jason, he's also basically a stereotype of comics jason and everything i don't want comics jason to be, which is a bit ironic. but there is some cool storytelling in there and my beloved panels from ak: genesis with jay excited about the library.

also like. i think we need to objectivelly agree that his arkham knight design is much cooler than red hood...

#dc comics #? once again i had it in my drafts and just never posted it? what's going on in my head? #answered #i'm still aiming to reply to the other asks i'm just. slow

[lieutenant-amuel]

Do you have a favorite chapter in your Gabe fic?

First I want to say I’m not going sentimental with this answer by saying “I love all my chapters equally, this story is so important to me after all <3” because I’ll be lying if I say it. There are chapters I don’t like, there are chapters I enjoyed writing yet I’m quite indifferent to them as stories and the other way around when the chapter itself is great but writing it was painful.

In the whole I do love this story, and I think everyone has already noticed it. But I obviously don’t like every single thing about it and if I had a chance to change some details, plot elements, or anything, I probably would (although no, I actually wouldn’t).

Anyway, to answer your question, it’s actually quite complicated because I do have several favourites x) I think objectively my best chapters are the ones that have two parallel storylines (plot A and plot B) whereas “linear” chapters are usually weaker because I tend to put too much stuff into it (The Fencing School and The Chess Elective are quite good examples of it. Although I love Frida’s arc in both chapters). But with some exceptions of course.

One of my favourite chapters is The Nameless Girl. I love both Gabe and Valerio’s stories there, I revealed a very important part of Valerio’s backstory and illustrated his positive side that he hadn’t showed in a long time, I introduced new characters who are very entertaining to me, it has good action and is quite adventure driven (Gabe’s story). Plus, I think this is quite a good ending for Gabe’s short storyline of realizing that solving the hideout mystery did more harm than good for him which was mostly for the reason he hid it from his friends and tried to do it alone. And I do love the scout camp setting.

Another favourite is Questions and Answers (despite the fact it has a sucky title). I did a good job with symbolism and paralleling Gabe and Valerio’s stories, both of which are also very good and I love them. It has a great scary story The Man in the Cloak, it has good humor, action, and a mystery with the riddles Gabe heard in the pyramid (they all are foreshadowings, if you try to solve them, you’ll pretty much figure out the core plot events). It has an absolutely fantastic scene of Valerio’s breakdown that I was extremely excited to write, and after my friend pointed out the flashback transition of Valerio closing and then opening his eyes, I started to appreciate it more too because it actually turned out very nice.

The Secret Hideout as a beginning of the best storyline (in my opinion) this fic has so far. Once again it has two plots, and they both are great. I created my own cipher for this chapter which marked the beginning of me enjoying it so much I created at least five more different ciphers that I probably won’t even include in the story. I expanded Avaloran Royal Guard system because I always thought a lot about it even if my headcanons basically have nothing to do with the canon. Both the ciphers and the Royal Guard are important parts of WBTL “worldbuilding”, and I’m actually pretty proud of myself for creating the sort of my own lore for this story. I’m repetitive but the fact that Gabe’s story is quite action driven in this chapter also makes me enjoy it.

The Eagle and the Crow is great for shedding light on Emilio’s story and making him more sympathetic which is important given he used to be the main antagonist for quite a long time. I showed his emotions, his struggles and tried to explained why he treated Valerio the way he did. I don’t know how I can explain why I love it but the entire scene of Emilio and Valerio meeting for the first time (starting with Emilio hesitating to open the door to the staffroom because he’s not sure whether Valerio has arrived already and ending with Emilio overhearing Valerio and Señor Murillo’s conversation). I don’t know it just was extremely entertaining to me to write how their relationship originated and it also has quite many lines that I personally find funny (“I don’t chuckle after every sentence” *chuckles*, “my favourite colour is green”, “this stupid game with those stupid questions”). The last scene of the flashback where I integrated short words into the narrative to illustrate how Emilio’s interest towards Valerio arouses (observation - concern - suspicion - goal) is probably one of the most powerful scenes I’ve ever written. The very first scene where Valerio reveals details of his past to Emilio is also great, and I’ll always be proud of this short fragment where Valerio describes what it felt like to be burnt.

That unforgettable feeling of the flames melting into your skin and spreading the burning pain from deep within your body. So, the only thing left for you is to scream. But you can't. As your lungs are squeezed by a suffocating embrace of smoke that doesn't let you take a single breath of fresh air. Yes. That's impossible to forget.

And how can I not mention the story The Eagle and the Crow. This is a metaphor of Valerio and Emilio, and I think this is very smart. Anyway, Emilio and Valerio’s relationship is absolutely fascinating to me so writing it (and reading about it too) always brings me joy.

And I think that’s it. I know you possibly asked me for one chapter but at this point I actually cannot choose between those four x) They all embody different aspects of this story that I absolutely adore, and I really wish to make more chapters of the same quality in the future.

As for other chapters, I love them too to a greater or lesser extent.

Some of them are very close to my most favourite chapters, I also find them great but they’re more chill and it makes them less exciting in my opinion. Those are Día de los Muertos, A Burglar, The Last Ship (although this chapter is just filled with different symbols and foreshadowings for Valerio’s story so I think I’d put it higher in my list), The Scout Camp, The Past Is In The Past, and the latest chapter The First of September.

Some have great concepts but I personally don’t like how they’re written in a stylistic sense (to put it short they’re just sucky written but are good stories, and well, it’s fixable so I won’t be too harsh on them). Those are The Essay Topic and The Chess Classes.

Some are great but as I mentioned above, include too many scenes which makes them overwhelming and quite difficult to summarize and navigate through (even I, the author, sometimes forget which chapter includes a certain scene). Those are The Fashion Show, The Fencing School, and The Chess Elective.

Some are good (but not great lol) story wise but are written poorly. Those are A Trip To Maarswik and Gabe’s Birthday.

Some are bad and nothing can help them but they were a base for the future chapters so I cannot remove them and am learning to appreciate them lol. Those are A New Beginning and The Long-Awaited Letter.

And some have an honorable mention because I now have conflicted feelings about them x) Those are the first three chapters: A Tale of the Dragon Slayer, The Baking Disaster, and The Olaball Practice. They were meant to show some of my Gabe headcanons but atmosphere wise they’re extremely different from the rest of the story so I think if I were an actual writer, I’d just create a separate collection of short stories to illustrate how Gabe’s childhood, without a bunch of my original characters and complicated plots, looked like (because I do have a few more ideas that have nothing to do with the main plot and I plan to put them somewhere in the beginning if I write them).

Anyway, as I was saying, I do love this story in the whole. My main issue about some chapters is just the way how they’re written whereas plot wise they’re absolutely great and I wouldn’t change anything about them. They’re the part of the established story and of the story I genuinely love (although now when I often come back to the old chapters, I can clearly see why nobody read it lol). But well, ugly descriptions and awkward dialogues can always be fixed as I keep writing and gain more experience in this field so I really don’t want to be harsh on myself. The story itself is good, and I think this is all that matters.

Thank you for this ask! And sorry for giving such a long answer ajhdnfjfk.

#Ask me anything #Was Born To Lead #Not me saying that a bigger half of the whole story is absolutely great :’D #I’m not being narcissistic at all really #Seriously though I’ve actually learnt how to love this story despite its flaws so I think it’s better than #saying that my story is so much perfect it doesn’t have any flaws #or #saying that it has so many flaws it hopelessly sucks I have no right to use words and put them together like that #Yes it’s flawed but it’s still good #for me at least #and this is what’s important

[nocek]

Don't spare us the long rant! We want to hear your thoughts!

Oh you are going to regret this ;P

So here goes my loooooooong angry rant about Taskmaster and also the Black Widow movie in general.

Let's start with my point of comparison. Captain America the Winter Soldier was a good movie. It's still in my top 3 Marvel movies as I'm sure is for many people. And statistically speaking everybody likes Bucky. He is like the most beloved side character right after Loki. I guess.

Anyway. My point is that Taskmaster and Winter Soldier have bit for bit the exact same building blocks: hypercompetent antagonist that is a serious threat to our hero who just can't win with in one on one combat. But then plot twist: our antagonist was just a victim and puppet without free will in hands of actual villain who is bland bureaucrat.

So why did Winter Soldier worked really really well and Taskmaster was just ehh.. ok?

Well the short answer is that catws was a much tighter movie that had clearer goal (and also that goal/theme was singular: good things get corrupted with time and sometimes you get to start over) compared to black widow which had to jump through too many hoops and still somehow managed it but it wasn't as graceful as it would be if they (as in executives) resigned from one or two hoops and flips and explosions.

And I'm omitting a BIG disadvantage of making a prequel movie about a character that they killed off in shitty way. Though that created one of extra hoops for them to jump through: quickly build up Yelena as a character.

And character build they did. Because srsly Yelena is awesome and I love her. BUT. That came at a price.

Lets compare to catws. The new character there is Sam (and kiiiiiiiinda also Natasha a bit but that's a topic for a different rant) who is nowhere near as well build as Yelena. At the beginning. Because he had time to be fleshed out and naturally grow in few different movies and then we got a deep dive in the Falcon and the Winter Soldier.

But Marvel can't give Yelena few movies because she will appear in Hawkguy an Hawkeye series and also Marvel is generally dividing their assets into: outer spaaaace, down to earth heros and magic stuff (aliens, androids and wizards ;P). But also they can only create so many things in a year.

So yeah. Yelena offtopic can be summarized that I love that we have her as we have her but it came at a cost of air time of the movie.

So comparing the movies again:

Catws had the theme of good things being corrupted with time. And the theme was underlined 3 times through Peggy, Bucky and then Shield/Hydra. Which are interconnected and also make nice scale from inner conflict of the main character to the outer conflict of the movie.

In Black Widow there is the topic of the past evil that never went away and is still taking away free will from people. And again we have it shown through 3 outlets: Yelena, Taskmaster and Black Widows. But there is also whole family subplot attached to Yelena and there is Red Room attached to Black Widows. So as you can see things are getting crowded. Which in turn make the theme a bit blurry.

I mean, sure, the Red Room should be the Shield equivalent. Even it could take smaller space because good Shield turns out to be evil Hydra is generally more time consuming to explain than Red Room bad. But still combining Red Room and Black Widows make things a bit crowded.

(There is a reason why the surprise subplot of there is more Winter Soldiers was in separate movie and was kinda handwaved and cut to minimum. But they couldn't do that here).

But it's time to stop my ranting about whole Black Widow movie and focus on comparing Taskmaster and Winter Soldier.

Because to be honest both are bare bones of character and more of an carte blanche in the movie. Both have barely any screen time yet there are colossal difference which stems out of:

first introduction: as I mentioned they are hypercompetent and unstoppable threat that you can't win with, you can only hope to run away (both done equally well)

programmable killing machine:

For Taskmaster we just get a scene with her watching other heroes fighting at the screen. For the sake of building up the mystery of character we think that "he" is just watching. Maybe learning or more likely just being creepy. The information about the chip and literal programming is given to us much later in the movie which makes this scene lose the power. idk how it will work on rewatch? Maybe better? Hopefully. right now there is too many new movies in cinemas to go for a rewatch and disney+ still isn't available here -.-

For Bucky we have literal torture scene. You just can't be more blunt than that. It also hammered the next point in.

there is human behind the mask:

Winter Soldier is introduced with full face mask which he gradually loses and then we have the big reveal of not only: that's a human but also that's a human our main hero cares about deeply.

With Taskmaster they fucked up it for chap plot twist. We are learning quite late that oh snap that's Antonia (that we don't really care about) and our main hero kinda feels guilty about her.

I think the big difference is what kind of character Steve and Nat are and also the way they reveal this secret. Steve actively recognizes Bucky by himself and is very openly shocked. Nat is passively told and shown that hey, this is Antonia. And there is no time in the movie for Nat (and for us) to be shocked because that's the 3rd act and we need time for explosions and stuff.

Besides, the problem is that all the big plot twist reveals are boring on rewatch (stil big props for Pacific Rim and giving us the monster reveal in like second minute of the movie, I will never not appreciate that).

Also on related shitty note. We the audience. Bucky is handsome and vulnerable and we can drool all over him (and oh man, we the fandom did a fair share of drooling). Antonia is disfigured and not sexualized in any way. Which I'm actually grateful for but there is no pretending that doesn't make a hell lot of difference. But that's a whole different, ugly and big topic I'm not remotely qualified to write about. I'm just angry ranting here.

they don't have free will:

For Winter Soldier we have amnesia + torture tropes which to be honest have been done over and over again and it shouldn't have worked as well as it worked. Bit it did. In context of Black Widow movie it worked because it was just one guy that actively broke through brainwashing with active help of the hero.

In Black Widow there is a lot of characters that are pasively "woken up" out of mind control over and over again by active protagonist. Unfortunately the repetition kinda cheapens it. Especially in comparison to main gut punch right in the feels scene in the other movie. Which is why it's not fair to compare the two.

So lets talk about lack of free will aspect itself. To be honest the mind control aspect in Black Widow was done really great from story perspective. Evil scientists perfected it to the point it being (bit handwavey but) completely impersonal but also completely dehumanizing to the subject. So I'm buying that it can be completely switched off in equally efficient and impersonal way. Even the way they explained it with Alexei the pig was great and terrifying... to a point. Because then kicked the main problem with this movie. Clearly some execs came and saw it and went whoa... that's too dark for pg13 blockbuster. Let's put some cheap jokes here. And it happens over and over again in this movie :S

humanizing flashback scene that ties them to main hero:

For Bucky, sure we had Captain America First Avenger but a movie needs to stand on it's own legs. That's why we have the flashback scene which shows us that Bucky cared about Steve. Leaving it at the narration in Smithsonian of "best friends since childhood" would be just telling us. And we needed to be shown and we needed a space for the "till the end of line" so it could come back and stab us right in the feels.

Also because we are ignoring previous movie Russos cleverly made us care about Winter Soldier because Steve cares about Winter Soldier. And we already know and like Steve so building up our main character gives us more mileage out of new bare bones character (because let's be honest, Winter Soldier is just that). Two birds one stone thing.

In Black Widow there is no such thing which IMHO is the main reason Taskmaster doesn't work. We just get information about cardboard cutout: insert cute little girl here (only told, not even shown actual cardboard) and all of the emotional connection to Natasha is: I know that my boss that I hate has a daughter, she got in the crossfire. Which means nobody cares.

All it would take is adding a short flashback scene. idk Dreykov is an asshole and doesn't care about Antonia but she is she cutest and most adorable little girl. She treats the Black Widows as older sisters. Hell if you want to make it more horrorish copy of the idea of Thor wanting to be a Valkyrie when he grows up or T'challa wanting to be a Dora Milaje. Little Antonia wants to be Black Widow when she grows up because they are badass and they are nice to her (and are also slightly confused by her) because she is nice to them and is only person that treats them as humans. Hell we could have short interaction between her and Nat. Just a smile between them would be enough.

You could get a lot of character buildup mileage out of such a short scene.

But it couldn't happen partially because the movie didn't have time for that but we didn't get that mostly because it would show us instead of telling that Nat killed a cute little innocent girl for her own personal gain. (well she thought she was destroying Red Room but mostly wanted to get away - vide she didn't check on Yelena or other widows. But I wouldn't hold that against her. It was put your oxygen mask first kind of situation. But still it would make her look bad)

Besides, that would take guts to actually show.

And technically they could have afforded to have that guts. That was last movie with Nat anyway. It would actually make this plotline about her feeling guilty about Dreykov's daughter and red in her ledger work. But well... It was last movie so they wanted to leave us with the most goodest and bleeding hartest and heartwarming mary sue version of Nat with just telling us without showing hey, she got dark past.

On the other hand if we had the rumored Endgame plotline of Nat running an orphanage. Damn that would tie to this plotline so well. We could tie the loose widows also. Dam we were robbed here I tell ya >.<

Ok I'm overdoing offtopic about Nat. Sorry

design

So yeah. Design wise Winter Soldier is like great. For Taskmaster, she sure looks cool but also kinda generic? If in 10 years you'd show me her and say it's antagonist from GI Joe or something I'll believe you :S (not touching the debate that in comics something something because unfortunately I don't know Taskmaster from comics. Although I hear that few recent ones were quite good so I'll check them out sooner or later)

snapping out of mind control

I mentioned before. It would be unfair and there is no point comparing main emotional scene of the movie versus means to an end that were repeated several times through a movie.

Natasha freeing Antonia even if she thought that Antonia will kill her because that would fair was great. What I'm annoyed is a cheap fakeout that went with that. It was just after the bombastic finale with explosions and all the cgi shit. Even without looking at the movie runtime it was obvious there will be no extra fight scene.

In catws it worked because the cgi pew pew extravaganza was a background noise and was part of a continuous fight. In BW helicarriers fell already, there was a second of dust settling and then Nat throws away the shield (uses that capsule). Tension just fell from highest place in a movie (quite literally lol), trying to rise it again for such a short moment just doesn't work.

But that's the general problem with Marvel movies. Bombastic CGI fest as grand finale that probably is "outsourced" and then actual director comes back and needs to end movie super quickly.

disappearing act at the end

So in catws there is mystery of what will Bucky do. We are given some hope since he dragged Steve out of river and visited the museum but thats all. I mean there is this annoying Marvel thing of skipping over the interesting ending of last movie and starting with next plot point. We were hoping for the grand roadtrip/hunt for Bucky but nope. We must run ahead with all the plotlines (same way I'm sure that the Spiderman is Peter Parker and he killed a guy thing will be already dealt with in the beginning of the next movie -.-) But that's bonus mini rant.

In BW they needed to wrap up to many plot lines too quickly so Antonia wakes up and that's all. We don't get a suggestion what she may do. The problem of the chip she still has installed is omitted. There is nothing. She just fucks off to lalaland with other Black Widows the end. Because we needed ending for Nat's actual family which was ok but also kinda rushed.

As I mentioned waaaay before (god, this rant is pretty long) too many hoops to jump through.

Which really sucks because if they added that one flashback scene just for Antonia and spared few more minutes for the overall ending it would work so much more better.

And I even know where they could have saved few minutes (besides the explosions thingies). The supply guy. One extra character in a movie with too many characters. In catws the supply problem (with wings) was solved with nbd shrug. If you wanted to show that Nat has her own web of contacts it should be more than one guy. IDK in Budapest there could be 10 second scene with neighbor saying hi nice to see you again we reinforced the walls after last time. In Norway we could see her visiting some special secret supply stash run by some rando before getting to the mobile home.

But oh she was on the run so that would be too many people. Then cut the people entirely. The shitty helicopter can be worked around with joke that I'm not on speaking terms with Stark rn and that's the best we can have on short notice.

Eh.. side rant again. Sorry.

So to wrap it up. I actually really would love to see what will happen with the loose Black Widows and Antonia because here they were really underdeveloped. And while widows were more of a group hero and we have Yelena as a representative so in a way it balances out but Taskmaster needed so little extra care to make her character so much better and I'm a tiiiiiiny bit salty about it.

#text post #long post #very long rant #black widow #black widow spoilers #black widow movie #black widow 2021 #taskmaster #antonia dreykov #i kinda doubt we will see her again #but one can hope #if anyone actually read through all of this congratz! #and thank you #let me hug you #(and I'm sorry it's so long)

[sunshineseguin]

take me back to the night we met || mat barzal

pairing: mathew barzal x fem!reader

summary: months after the end of your relationship, mathew still struggles to come to terms with losing you. he sees you everywhere and in everything he does. what sticks with him the most is the night you met.

warnings: break-up angst, alcohol consumption, mentions of anxiety & a near panic attack, swearing, mentions of sex (nothing graphic), possible grammatical errors, flashbacks are in italics!!

word count: 6,371

author’s note: i wrote this fic inspired by the song ‘the night we met’ by lord huron so i definitely recommend listening while reading! i wrote this fic as a standalone and don’t plan on writing a second part. feedback is always appreciated, i read everything even if you put it in the tags.

check out my players list & prompt list if you’d like!

Mathew knew it wasn’t a good idea to go out, especially on a Sunday night with an early practice in the morning. The season was about to start and he knew he had every reason to be just as amped up about it as his teammates. He should be cheering with them and drinking beers carelessly like he wouldn’t regret it in the morning. Yet, he couldn’t. The regret that he was already carrying on his shoulders was enough to last him a lifetime. Instead, he was gulping down whiskey on the rocks like it was water and he was stranded in the Sahara Desert, wallowing in his own self pity as he had been for months.

He felt a heavy hand on his shoulder and glanced up at Anthony who gave it a squeeze. The blonde smiled, but it was one of sympathy, his bright blue eyes swimming with concern for his best friend. Mathew almost scoffs.

“How ya doin’, man?” Anthony asks and glances towards Anders who’s watching them both closely.

The raven haired male simply shrugged half heartedly in response. He knew his captain was worried about him, the whole team was for that matter. He hadn’t been right for a while and nearly closed himself off completely. He didn’t join in on the playful chirps at morning skate or reply to Anthony’s invites of golf with the boys. He didn’t go to the team cookouts. He barely mustered a reply when Trotz was ripping into him for being so unfocused. The guys were starting to realize they only ever saw him on the ice or drowning himself in the hard stuff at the bar. He was a walking shell of the man he had been a year ago.

“What happened, Barzy?” Anthony sighed, moving to stand in front of his friend so that he could meet his eyes. “We can’t help you if we don’t know what’s going on.”

Mathew saw a notification pop up on his phone that his Uber was approaching, giving himself the perfect opportunity to get out of his best friend’s inevitable interrogation. He knew the team was only going to let this go on for so much longer before sitting him down and making him talk about his feelings. He was already dreading all of the things Anders had to say but hadn’t yet. He tossed back the last of the amber liquid in his glass, not even feeling it burn its way down his throat with the amount he’d already consumed that night. He stood from his stool, a bit unsteady on his feet as he pats Anthony on the shoulder leaves him with few words before heading out.

“It doesn’t matter. You can’t help me.”

The bar was definitely over what capacity should allow that night. The bar was swarmed as people shouted their drink orders at the poor bartenders who were scurrying around like mice. Patrons were spilling out onto the dance floor, packed in like sardines to the point that you could hardly move. You pushed yourself through the crowd, muttering worthless apologies to people who weren’t even listening as you desperately searched for your friends. You’d lost them over twenty minutes ago and had lost all hope in finding them.

You were starting to feel claustrophobic amidst the sweaty bodies pressed against you, chest growing tight the longer you spent in the crowd. It felt like the walls were beginning to close in on you as your head grew fuzzy. The Long Island Iced Teas you’d been consuming since you got there three hours ago certainly didn’t help. You forced your way through the crowd and to the exit of the bar, shoving people who wouldn’t move as you tried to get air into your lungs.

You stumbled out of the doors to the bar, ignoring the odd looks people heading inside sent you. Your knees felt weak as you braced yourself against the wall. Hand shaking, you pressed it to your chest to feel that your heart was rapidly pounding away. You closed your eyes and did all you could to focus on your breathing and get yourself to calm down. You hadn’t had a panic attack in some time, sophomore year of college the last you could recall, having learned what triggered them and how to keep the panic from overcoming you.

Mathew was standing farther down, away from the never ending flow of people coming and going from the bar’s entrance. He had his arms crossed over his chest as he stared out at the street with a scowl. He and Anthony were supposed to be leaving together, walking back to their shared apartment building a few blocks away. The blonde male had been busy when Mat stepped out, chatting away with some pretty redhead who’d caught his eye early in the night. He was about ready to make the walk by himself if his friend didn’t show himself in the next five minutes.

He saw you out of the corner of his eye, alone and trembling without so much as a jacket. He looked around to see if anyone you might know was near, but no one was paying you any mind. He was overcome with a sense of worry as he stared at you, not knowing if some sleazebag slipped something in your drink or if you had some kind of medical condition. He found himself moving closer to you and asking, “Hey, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just-” you stated breathlessly, swallowing the lump that had formed in your throat, “I just need a second.”

You stood there for another moment until you had yourself composed, finally standing up straight when it didn’t feel like your knees would give out anymore. You weren’t expecting to open your eyes and find the person attached to the voice that just spoke to you still standing there. His hazel eyes were filled with worry as they flickered over your frame. You were too busy gawking to notice his genuine concern.

“Did something happen in there? Do you need me to call someone?” the handsome stranger asked, his gaze finally settling on yours.

“N-No,” you stuttered sheepishly, clearing your throat and blinking quickly as if that would make the nervousness go away. “It’s lame, actually, I lost my friends and… The crowd was a bit much.”

Mathew’s shoulders visibly relaxed when he knew something traumatic hadn’t happened and a laugh passed through his lips. He offered you a smile and replied, “Yeah, that is kind of lame.”

You scoffed playfully and rolled your eyes, feeling your face heat up slightly. He laughed again and shook his head a bit, saying, “I kid, I kid. This place does get pretty rowdy on the weekends.”

“Not to be completely cheesy but, I take it you come here often?” you asked with a smile, wrapping your arms around your middle as the cool New York air started to seep into your skin. The adrenaline from your near panic attack had kept you from realizing how cold it was out and you’d left your jacket inside at your table. Hopefully one of your friends would grab it despite the drunken escapades they were partaking in.

“Pretty often, yeah,” Mathew grinned at the question. He was sure you hadn’t intended to use it as a pickup line, yet he found himself hoping there was genuine interest laced behind your words.

He shrugged off his black bomber jacket when he noticed you shivering and held it out to you. As you opened your mouth to protest, the look on his face told you that he wasn’t taking no for an answer. So you took the item from his hands and slipped in on with a gracious ‘thank you’ once you were swallowed in its warmth.

“I’m Y/N, by the way.”

“Mat,” he replied while shoving his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.

It was silent for a moment between you, neither knowing exactly what to say. Mathew didn’t know if you were intending to head back inside and enjoy your night. While he was more than ready to go home ten minutes ago, he was now enamored by you, and wanted to do anything to stay in your presence. Usually, he was quick witted and able to charm a girl with a few simple words. In front of you he was drawing a blank, afraid of saying the wrong thing and scaring you off.

Seeing you shyly toy with the ends of his sleeve, a nervous smile curling on your lips as you looked at his feet had a surge of confidence flowing through him. He offered, “Would you want to grab a coffee? I know a place that makes the best homemade crepes.”

The memory hit Mathew like a freight train as he stepped out of the doors of the bar. He was left staring at the wall, at the very spot he spoke to you for the first time. He couldn’t feel the dull ache in his chest, having numbed himself with whiskey that was far too expensive. He turned to walk down to the street to wait for his Uber, but stopped short as he caught a glimpse of a woman walking by.

His eyebrows furrowed as he stared after her. It was as if time slowed down, everything moving in slow motion but her. Everything was as he remembered from that night. The way her hair was styled, the dress that stopped halfway down her thighs, the heels that echoed in his head with each step she took. What shook him to his core the most was the jacket sported on her shoulders. From the night he first gave it to her, she would always steal it, claiming it looked better with most of her outfits than his own. He never argued, because he agreed, and he would never turn down a chance to see her in his clothes. It was you — unmistakably you.

Mathew’s feet started moving on their own accord behind you. It was like you were running away, until he realized it was him who was moving in slow motion with the people around him. The streets were bustling with people of all likes, experiencing the enticing New York nightlife. He was weaving through the crowd, calling out your name, desperate, broken and begging you to put back together the pieces of his broken heart.

You kept walking and Mathew was trying his hardest to catch up, but was like with each step he took his feet were growing heavier and heavier. He let out a strangled, frustrated cry as he yelled out your name once more. Suddenly, he was knocked to the side, stumbling over his own feet and nearly falling into the street. He turned to look at the man who just rammed into him carelessly.

“Watch where you’re going, you prick!” he shouted after the man who paid him no mind, receiving a few dirty looks from others.

It was then that he realized everyone was moving in real time again. His breath hitched in his throat as he spun to search for you in the crowd. You were gone. Deep down, he knew you had never been there in the first place. His mind was playing another dirty little trick on him, as it did so often the last few months. His guilty subconscious tormented him with images of you, making him watch you slip away time and time again. The hollow feeling deep within him only grew with every hallucination.

He turned his attention to the building he’d found himself in front of, and if the visions of you weren’t already torture enough, the universe had just thrown something else into the mix. Yet, he found himself making his way up to the door, the bell chiming above his head as he entered the quant diner. He takes a glance around, seeing an old couple at a table on one side of the building and a man by himself at the bartop, a laptop open and headphones in as he had a quiet conversation on what Mathew assumed was a Zoom or FaceTime call. He drops his head and walks to the familiar corner booth then slides into the seat and cancels his Uber.

A moment later, the waitress approaches the table. Mathew meets her eyes and embarrassment floods through him as he takes note of her sympathetic smile. He’s seen the smile a thousand times now from anyone who had an inkling of what he’d been going through.

“Coffee?” she asked softly, knowing the answer before he could even muster a nod.

You slide into the booth, sighing in content as the warmth from the building seeps into your bones. Mathew slides in across from you and the two of you share a shy smile as you meet eyes. Never before had he been so nervous to take a girl out. Maybe it was because you weren’t like the others. You hadn’t thrown yourself at him the first chance you got. You didn’t seem to know who he was or his status in the social hierarchy of the people in Long Island. It was refreshing and terrifying all at the same time.

You both look up as the waitress walks over with a bright smile on her face and asks what you’d like to drink. “Coffee,” the two of you say at the same time. Mathew’s face visibly turns a light shade of pink, and in turn you feel a rush of heat traveling up your own neck. The waitress smiles knowingly.

“Cream, please,” you add.

As the waitress turns to Mathew he says, “Black is fine.”

It’s silent for a moment as you both wait for the waitress to return with your drinks. Your eyes are floating around the diner, taking in some of the unique decor and 80’s flare with a modern twist. Mathew watches you closely and decides he quite likes the way your eyes shine under the glow of the baby blue neon lights. He takes it upon himself to start pointing out some of the historical decor in the building. It’s your turn to admire him and how his eyes light up when he talks about something he finds exceptionally appealing. His lips are curled into a smile as he spouts off facts to you about each item he points out.

He pauses his rant about people not appreciating The Beatles enough when he sees you grinning at him. He smiles sheepishly and diverts his gaze to the steam rising out of the coffee mug just placed in front of him, asking, “What?”

“Nothin’,” you replied with a small shrug, smile never leaving your face. You stirred a splash of cream into your own coffee and quizzed, “I take it as you come here often too?”

Mathew felt his ears grow hot but he still managed to muster up a confident smirk and lifted his eyes to meet yours, “I said best homemade crepes didn’t I?”

“That you did.”

“I usually end up here after a night at the bar and I need to sober up. People say coffee doesn’t work but it sure feels like it,” he explained, “Plus, they serve breakfast twenty four hours.”

The way your eyes lit up when Mathew said that had butterflies fluttering in his stomach. He listened as you went on a rant about how breakfast was underrated and you’d kill for pancakes for dinner over a steak most nights. From there, the conversation between the two of you flowed effortlessly. You learned how the other liked their eggs cooked and what your drink of choice was. Your favorite colors and favorite scent of body wash. Being with Mathew made you feel as if you’d been sleeping all of these years and were just waking up. Never had you felt so drawn to someone in the way that you were to him, and him the same. Any other night, if he had met a girl in the fashion that he’d met you, he would have had you in and out of his apartment long ago. He wouldn’t be on his third coffee refill with a plate of perfectly cooked strawberry crepes in front of him.

Mathew learned that you hadn’t been in New York long. You’d moved about two months ago and had a fashion design internship with some fancy company he’d never heard of. You were looking to build your own empire in the business. With the way you exuded yourself now that you were comfortable with him and talked with so much passion about your dreams, he didn’t think you’d have any trouble. The drive you had to build a future for yourself wasn’t something he was used to hearing from the women he surrounded himself with.

The famous athlete, something you learned about him in between bites of food, was used to women throwing themselves at him and his teammates. Some of them were just looking to brag that they slept with an Islander, others had more devious intentions. They were after the money Mathew tried his hardest not to spend recklessly - the gifts he could potentially buy. Some wanted his last name, to be in with the WAGs and flaunt their relationship all over social media; to rub it in the face of others that she got what they so desperately wanted. It was part of the reason that he never exclusively dated, too afraid that there were ulterior motives behind sultry whispers and sly smirks.

The diner that had previously been significantly busy when the two of you got there had now cleared out completely. You and Mathew hadn’t realized how long you’d actually been there until you took note of the empty tables. Your waitress was standing in the corner against the wall, looking like she was mindlessly scrolling through Instagram while she waited for you to leave. You and the Centerman had been so lost in each other that you hadn’t realized hours had passed and it was nearly two in the morning.

“I guess we should get out of here, huh?” you asked, hoping the gorgeous man in front of you picked up on the suggestive tone of your voice.

It didn’t seem like he did though with the way his shoulders slumped and he mumbled, “Yeah, I guess we should.”

As Mathew fished his wallet out, he felt you gaze burning into him. You weren’t ready for the night to end and you were hoping he was thinking the same. He looked up and locked eyes with you, holding the stare as you raised a singular eyebrow and a coy smile curled on your lips. Realization crossed the chiselled features of his face and he gave you a smirk before throwing down a good amount of cash on the table. He slid out of the booth and held his hand out to you, giving you a small bow as if you were royalty.

“M’lady?”

Mathew chokes on the very breath in his lungs, his eyes burning as he stared down at the cold, untouched mug of coffee in front of him. It’s no longer black, now a light chestnut color but the splash of cream he’d subconsciously added to it. He had picked that up from you because ‘only psychopaths drink black coffee, babe’. He switched back of course. This was the first time he let himself slip up and fall back into a habit that used to be so comfortable with you.

He swallows thickly and stuffs a generous amount of cash into the black checkbook, far more than what the coffee was worth. He pushes himself out of the booth and avoids the waitress’ eyes as she comes over to collect the payment. He can’t even muster a smile as he mumbles out a ‘thank you’ and exits the diner. Lori, the woman who always gave you the best service there, is left to sadly stare after him. She knows better than to ask what happened to the sweet girl who always used to accompany him.

Mathew walks a couple blocks down to his apartment building, trying not to remember how you’d clung to his arm. How your giggles echoed down the empty streets and your perfume swirled around him. When he closed his eyes he thought he could almost smell it, wondering if traces of you were lingering on the jacket hanging heavy on his shoulders. He still remembers how it felt to have your hands wrapped around his bicep and your hip bumping his as you walked pressed to his side. He enters his building and the feeling is gone as quickly as it came.

He walks into his dark apartment and thinks that it feels colder and colder every night that he comes home alone. He can’t help but take note of your missing pile of shoes by the door that he always used to chirp you for. He hangs his keys on the hook and his eyes linger on the empty spot beside it. He walks past the couch on the way to the bedroom and tries not to think about how bare it looks without the hoodies you used to steal from him littered about.

He strips into his boxers after brushing his teeth and climbs under the chilly sheets. He’s turned on his side, staring at the vacant spot beside him. He can see you there, messy hair splayed out around you and your face smiling back at him. He reaches out and grabs the pillow that used to be deemed yours, pulling it into his chest tightly. Your scent is long gone from the pillowcase, yet he still buries his nose into it and squeezes his eyes shut as if that will bring you back.

As he begins to drift off to sleep, his mind once again tortures him with visions of you. How you stumbled into his apartment the night you met as a mess of teeth and tongues fighting for dominance. You undressed each other on the way to the bedroom, clothes scattered across the floor. Your skin was hot against his as he laid you on his bed for the first time and worshiped every inch of your skin. He remembers your breathy moans in his ear as he filled you up and rocked into you, slow and deep. Your limbs were tangled as you came down from your highs, your head on his sticky chest as he ran his hand over the tangled hair on your head.

He remembers whispering, “I’ve never met anyone quite like you,” and you replying, “You’re something special, Mathew Barzal.” The two of you fell asleep like that, with Mathew thinking he could spend forever with you wrapped in his arms.

Mathew awoke the next morning with a pounding headache and a weight sitting heavy in his chest. He’s still clutching his pillow as he turns over and looks for you instinctively. When he’s once again faced with the empty space beside him, his heart drops. He flips onto his back and stares up at the ceiling. It’s the same everyday that he wakes up, replaying the day everything changed like a broken record in his head.

Your whirlwind romance with Mathew happened unexpectedly. While the two of you did click instantly, you certainly weren’t expecting it to be so serious so fast. He was a famous hockey player who was on the road most of the year. You thought, at most, you would be someone he called when he was home in New York because you were convenient. Instead, you got the fancy dinner dates and spontaneous trips to Philly when he played the Flyers. You got a bouquet of flowers at your door when he was off on a roadie. You got to meet Anthony and enjoy quiet nights in just drinking beers and mocking shitty reality TV. You had moved into his apartment almost completely after only four months without either of you really realizing — yet neither of you stopped it.

The relationship you had with Mathew was unique. It was something people dreamed of and hoped to find. You were Twin Flames; two halves of one soul that united. You fell for each other so hard and so fast it made you dizzy. Before you knew it, a year had passed. You’d completed your internship and your boyfriend was a rising star. You had built a strong foundation in New York and it was potentially where you could put down your roots and live out the rest of your life, yet you had bigger dreams and plans for yourself. Something you hadn’t been completely honest with Mathew about.

You were scared. Scared of the unknown complications and challenges you could face. The two of you had moved so fast you were having trouble differentiating between fantasy and reality — if this is really what you wanted. What if you settled down in New York and Mathew was traded to a different team across the country? What if he decided he didn’t want you anymore in a few weeks time, leaving you high and dry? What if you didn’t really love him and you were just convincing yourself that you did? These questions had been plaguing you for weeks, especially when he was away, and it was becoming too much. So you did the cowardly thing and you ran from it.

It was nearing the Stanley Cup playoffs and the Islanders were well on their way to securing a spot, so most of Mathew’s focus had been on hockey. It never bothered you because it was his career. It’s what he did for a living and what he loved, so how could you fault him for that? The roadies seemed to fall closer together and last a little longer. Mathew now knows that’s why he didn’t notice your things slowly disappearing from the apartment then, and he still beats himself up for not realizing that you were slipping away.

He’d been on one of those seemingly long roadies and his flight came in early that morning from Tampa Bay. While they came out victorious, the games had been rough and Mathew was sore. He couldn’t wait to decompress and cuddle up with you for the few days he had off until the next home game. As the Uber pulled up outside the building, he felt exhaustion overcoming him and wanted to sleep the rest of the day away.

He walked through the door, lugging his duffel bag and suitcase, a sigh leaving his lips at the fact that he was finally home again. The ease he felt was quickly replaced with panic and confusion when his eyes landed on the suitcases in the foyer. His blood ran cold in his veins as he dropped his bags and called out your name with a panicked tone. The apartment remains silent so he quickly makes his way to the bedroom, pushing the door open to find you sitting on the edge of the bed and staring out the window. His own rapid heartbeat is pounding in his ears as he pulls at his tie and moves towards you.

He drops to his knees on the floor in front of you, his eyes full of concern as he meets your tear filled ones. The pads of his fingers are rough and warm as he takes your hand in his own and whispers, “Why are your bags by the door, baby? What’s going on?”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” your voice breaks as you reply, bottom lip wobbling before a sob wracks your body.

Mathew quickly pulls you into his chest, his hand cradling the back of your head as you cry into his game day suit. Dread fills his body, having never seen you so upset. His heart is in his throat and he feels as if he’s going to be physically ill. He holds you like that, kissing the side of your head and whispering words of affirmation until you can compose yourself. You pull back from him and wipe your wet cheeks but he keeps one hand on the side of your head and the other on your waist.

Then you drop the bomb on him.

You explain that your internship was never a permanent plan to stay in New York. You have a flight in four hours that leaves for Paris. A one way ticket taking you to the fashion capital of the world to start your career. You found a job opportunity so perfect that you’d be stupid to pass up. Mathew wants to be happy for you. He wants to jump for joy and celebrate with you, but you hid this from him. You did exactly what he was afraid of and shared with you within hours of your first meeting. He’s filled with disbelief and anger instead.

“This was your plan the whole time? You hid this from me the last year we’ve been together?” he exasperates, moving to his feet as he starts to pace the room and tug at his hair.

“Everything was so good with us I didn’t want to ruin it. I was going to tell you, Mat, I swear.”

“When?!” he shouts, feeling guilty for a moment when he sees you flinch, but the anger overpowers it. “Because it looks like to me you were just going to leave without so much as a goodbye!”

You shake your head, and squeeze your eyes shut, pressing the heels of your palms to your eyes as the tears start to well again. You argue, “I knew when your flight was coming in. I wouldn’t just leave you like that.”

“But you are. You are leaving me like that. You clearly have your mind made up about this and didn’t bother telling me,” he rebuttals, “You let me believe for a year that you were in this. I’ve given you one hundred percent, despite the hardships. What did you give me, huh? Fifty at best?”

You’re quiet, not wanting to admit that you hadn’t been all in on the relationship like him, even though you acted like it. Really, you’d had one foot out the door the whole time. Mathew’s voice shakes as he stares at you from across the room and says, “I love you. I’m in love with you, Y/N.”

A choked sob wracks through your body at his words and you cover your face with your hands. You knew he was in love with you, even the blind could see how head over heels Mathew Barzal was for you. He starts desperately rambling about how the two of you can make it work. Yes, long distance is hard, but he believes it’s worth it — believes you can love him like he loves you if you’ll take the risk. Why else would you have spent a year with him if some part of you didn’t think so? You put up with his relentless hockey schedule when you had every reason to walk away and live your life like the other twenty somethings you surround yourself with.

You disagree though. Long distance would only complicate things further. The different timezones would be unforgiving to your conflicting work schedules. Mathew often didn’t get long enough breaks to be able to fly out and see you and it be worth it. Plus, an international flight once a month, maybe more? It sounded like a good idea but eventually his wallet would suffer. You certainly couldn’t do it with the salary you were starting at, nor would you risk losing your job by unimportant travel to see a man. It was a negative and closed off way of looking at it on your part, but for both of your sake, it was best that way.

“It’s impossible…”

“It’s not impossible, you just don’t want to try!” Mathew yells, unable to care that his neighbors have more than likely heard every word of your argument.

“Mat, I have had the best year of my life here in New York. I’ve made memories that I could never in a million years forget. You are a part of that. I love you, God, do I fucking love you, but admit it. This was never meant to be long term. Not with the paths our lives are taking. We were never meant to last forever,” you stand from the bed and stare at him across the room, pleading with him to look at it from your perspective. You wanted to leave this in a good place, friends possibly, if he could accept what this was at face value. Two people who loved each other very much, but weren’t meant to be. The cliche ‘right people, wrong time’.

Mathew couldn’t though, he wouldn’t. He was blinded by a rage that he had never felt before. You had wasted his time — a year that he could’ve spent entertaining pretty girls who threw themselves at him for a quick fuck. Partying with his teammates and friends and reveling in his success that was only growing with every game he played. He finds himself wishing he had left you alone that night outside of the bar and just gone home. He lets the fury coursing through his veins take over, and with his fists shaking at his sides, he grits out in a low voice, “Get out.”

His words don’t shock you. You don’t know what other outcome you hoped would come from this. It doesn’t stop the stabbing pain that shoots through the center of your chest though. He won’t even look at you, hard gaze concentrated at your feet with his jaw set tight. You fight the urge to go to him. Wrap your arms around him and take it all back. Promise him you’ll stay even though you’d be sacrificing everything. It wasn’t fair to you, so you force your feet to carry you out of the bedroom and out of his front door for the last time. The sobs come once you’re in the elevator, then again in your friend’s (who was nice enough to give you a ride to the airport) car while they held you.

A few seconds after Mathew hears the front door shut, he’s tugging at his dark hair and letting out an agonizing shout. His breathing is ragged as he paces the room and debates running after you, but what would he say? The argument seemed final. You were set in your plan to take off to France and he couldn’t change your mind — he couldn’t make you stay. So he sat down on the edge of the bed and put his head in his hands. He squeezes his eyes shut and allows himself to feel the heartbreak, a guttural sob passing his lips.

Mathew closes his eyes and sucks a deep breath into his lungs as the memory fades. His heart is heavy in his chest as he reaches over and retrieves his phone from the bedside table. There’s a text from Anthony sent in the early hours of the morning, asking if he’d made it home safely. He doesn’t reply, instead opening the Instagram app and pulling up your profile.

His breath catches in his throat as he looks at your most recent picture. You changed your hair, a slightly different cut and a different color, but you’re just as breathtaking as he always thought you were. You’re sitting at a cafe with a cup of some fancy brew in front of you and the caption is in French, something about dreams coming true. Though, he’s not focused on some silly caption when he can’t take his eyes off of you. You look happy, wearing a smile he used to see when Anthony or one of your friends would sneak a picture of the two of you. Regret floods his body, the memory of the day you left still fresh in his mind. He thinks about liking the post just to tell you that he still loves you and he hasn’t forgotten about you. He exits out of the app before he allows himself to succumb to that urge.

He forces himself out of bed and into the shower before he’s late for practice. He mulls over in his head whether he should text you or not. He knows you more than likely won’t reply with how things ended all those months ago — now that you’ve moved on and you’re happy without him. He wishes he could too, yet he carries so much guilt for the things he said and allowing himself to have his heartbroken in the first place. He misses you like hell and the never ending visions of you plaguing his mind only makes it intensify.

Mathew heads to the rink in silence. He doesn’t speak to his teammates in the locker room and goes through the motions of practice in a daze. He’s not there completely and everyone can see it in his eyes. Anders is planning to pull him aside, Trotz insisting they have a talk and threatening to bench number thirteen until he gets his shit together. Mathew can tell. No one has tried to speak to him and Anthony keeps throwing him a side glance every few minutes. He prepares himself in the brief post-practice shower.

“Barzy, mind hanging back for a sec?” his captain asks as the other guys begin to filter out of the room.

He huffs out a sound of agreement while fishing his phone out of his duffel bag. His mom usually texts him a few times a week so he needs to let her know that he’ll give her a call later. He nearly drops the device as his eyes hone in on one message. Anders is talking but his heart is pounding so loudly in his ears he can’t hear him. He clicks on your name and feels every nerve in his body ignite at what the text message says.

I miss you. I’m coming home.

tagging the gc bc I love them @bricksatlandyswindow​ @butgilinsky​ @barzysthighs​ @babytkachuks​ @dmonchld​ @anxietyandtacos​ @sortagaysortahigh​ 

#mathew barzal #mat barzal #mathew barzal x reader #mat barzal x reader #mathew barzal imagine #mat barzal imagine #nhl writing #hockey writing #nhl imagine #hockey imagine #hockey fic #nhl fic #mathew barzal fic #mat barzal fic #nhl x reader #new york islanders imagine #islanders imagine #new york islanders fic #islanders fic #isles imagine #isles fic #take me back to the night we met

[cafeacademia]

Guardian | Chapter One

Draco Malfoy x Muggleborn!Reader Soulmate AU

Chapter Summary: As you navigate your fifth year at Hogwarts, you reflect on the things that have led you this far and you begin to wonder if your complicated friendship with Draco holds more meaning than you originally anticipated.

Warnings: A little bit of angst, some friendly teasing, mentions of Umbridge’s punishments, description of harm to a student, comfort, fluff.

Word count: Approx 4000 (oopsies)

Masterlist

A/N: Hi loves, here’s the first full part of the series! Please check out the Prologue if you’re new to the series, it gives some general setting up for the story and explains how this soulmate AU works. Enjoy! 💖

Flashbacks are separated using *** and use of the soulmate book is highlighted in italics

Previous Part | Next part

(Gif is my own)

Sitting in the library, Neville was not far from the desk you were sat at as he scoured the shelves for a copy of a book about rare magical properties in plants while you were trying to work on your final Potions essay for the term. “This feels impossible.” You yawned, slouching over your four parchment rolls of completed essay. All you really had to do now was make a conclusion, but your brain was wandering after a few hours of working on your homework and it just wasn’t happening. “That’s incredible.” Neville whispered to himself and you couldn’t help but breathe out a short laugh, looking over your shoulder to see that he was fully engrossed in the book he had pulled off the shelf.

Putting your quill down, you looked down at your hand, eyes trailing over the little bandage wrap you wore over the mark left from the detention you had served the previous evening with Umbridge. It was still sore and it felt very tender, but you tried your best to keep it hidden under the bandage and the sleeve of your school jumper. Slowly, your mind wandered towards what Draco might be up to. You hadn’t spoken to him in months since you had started in your fifth year and you’d had less of desire to do so now that he was in the Inquisitorial Squad. And your thoughts paced back to your fourth year when you had started to share a bit of a friendship with him.

***

“You’re fraternizing with the enemy, you are.” Ron scoffed. “I am not.” You frowned at him. “Oi, shove off would you? I know you don’t like the little git, but he seems to like our girl, isn’t that right George?” Fred asked, looking over your head to his twin who was standing on the other side of you. “That’s right Fred, maybe he’s got a crush on you.” He chuckled, nudging you in the side. “Ah, young love.” Fred sighed, garnering a multitude of reactions between Ron sounding utterly disgusted to Ginny’s amused laughter. “Draco is just being friendly.” You rolled your eyes. “Oh Draco is it now? Not Malfoy anymore eh?” Fred teased.

“He’s such a git, Malfoy’s not worth your time anyway, he’s probably just using you or something.” Ron argued and for once, Hermione gave Ron an agreeing nod. “Besides, since when is Malfoy nice to anyone?” Hermione asked, Fred and George giving each other a look, they were a little more accepting than the others, but with the question raised even the twins wondered if there wasn’t another motivation there.

Sighing, you leaned back against the wall of the quad and glanced over at Neville, who had just been quietly listening to the conversation without saying a word, but the look on his face told you that he felt the same as the rest of your friends. The problem was, while you really, truly valued their opinion and you understood that they were trying to look out for you, albeit with a little tough love on Ron’s end, you knew there was something there between you and Draco but you just couldn’t seem to find the words to describe it.

Was it friendship? Was it some kind of connection deeper than that? Whatever it was, Draco seemed to become a different person around you. He was more genuine, more open, more himself and oddly, you were starting to feel like he really valued your attention and your opinion.

“You shouldn’t be giving him the satisfaction.” Ron went on, Harry now wandering over to join the group and you heaved out a sigh because you knew as soon as he joined in, the two of them would be going on about how much of ‘bloody git’ Draco was. “Give who the satisfaction?” Harry asked. “Malfoy.” Ron replied in a disgruntled tone. “Fine,” You gritted out. “Then I won’t give either of you the satisfaction, Ronald.” You suddenly burst out, everyone looking at you as if you had grown a second head from your sudden outburst. “What’s that ‘sposed to mean?” He asked, a little bewildered.

But as the days passed, your friends started to realise what you had meant by that statement. Your little chats with Draco seemed to have halted entirely, and you didn’t speak a word about your budding friendship with the Slytherin. It was as if you had completely forgotten it had ever happened and your friends were starting to wonder if you were sneaking off to talk to him without any prying eyes, but of course there was no way they could prove it.

You valued their concern, you appreciated it in fact, but stupid or not you couldn’t deny that you felt a pull towards Draco. So you removed all indication that there was any interaction with Draco at all and it became quickly apparent to you, that maybe it was safer to just have a friendship with Draco in secret, especially as you weren’t too fond of the attention that being around the Slytherin Prince brought you.

You couldn’t deny, the secret meetings with Draco felt a little wrong, purely because you knew you’d get an absolute earful from Ron if he ever found out. But you still loved spending time with Draco, because out of everyone you had ever spent time with, Draco seemed to really value your company, be it quiet or more talkative. He seemed to understand when there were days that you just didn’t want to say a lot or you were more shy than usual and he understood that it was okay to enjoy silent company, but he also enjoyed it when you had energetic days and you wanted to chat about whatever came to mind.

***

“Are you listening?” Neville asked, leaning over your chair. “Hm?” You suddenly looked up at him, a little bit startled from being pulled away from your thoughts. “If we don’t hurry up, we’re going to be late for Defence Against the Dark Arts.” Neville warned and you pulled a face of worry before you hurried to pack away your things.

“Thank Merlin.” Neville mumbled as you both practically ran up the stairs to your classroom, seeing that there was a line of students waiting outside of the room, telling you that either you were just on time or Umbridge was late, though you thought the latter to be unlikely when she liked to go on about punctuality so often.

As you joined the line, Draco Malfoy made his way up the stairs, stopping when he reached you and pushed his way into the queue, though he was careful not to push you. And while Neville was busy catching up with Susan Bones who was standing on the other side of him, Draco leaned in and whispered to you.

“Meet me after class?” He asked. “Promise no funny business, just you and me.” He murmured and you tentatively glanced up at him. “This isn’t about you know what, is it?” You asked quietly. Draco knew what you were referring to. He knew you would be worried that he might try and pry some information out of you about the DA. Checking from side to side with a quick look, he held up his hand in front of you and pointed his ring finger at you. “I promise, it’s just like our old chats.” He whispered, glancing down to see you smiling, realising he was attempting a pinky promise. “Alright, but you’re using the wrong finger.” You had to refrain from giggling and instead, you shyly hid your smile as best as you could. Hesitantly you raised your hand, almost too shy to even touch him, but you pulled his little finger free and linked it with your own. “Sorry, I always forget which finger it is, muggle promises are strange.” Draco mumbled.

It wasn’t long before Umbridge finally poked her head out of the classroom and invited everyone in.

Draco sighed as he slouched down in his chair with his arms crossed in the drier than normal Defence Against the Dark Arts class. Umbridge was particularly boring to listen to as she droned on about a test you’d all be taking soon.

Instead, his focus was trained on the notebook that peeked out of the top of his bag that sat under his desk. He wished he could pick the book up and leaf through the pages, idly reading your handwriting, take in your thoughts and feelings and remind himself of days before now. Sometimes Draco wished that he could outright approach you and tell you that it was him, that he was your soulmate, but really that would be quite a bad move.

Draco wasn’t even sure if he’d be able to actually tell you, perhaps there was something that would prevent him from doing so or some sort of consequence and he was especially wary of this since his fourth year at Hogwarts when Pansy Parkinson had involved herself.

***

“What is that tatty old thing anyway? And why do you always brandish it about like a... a trophy or something?” She had asked with a judgemental edge to her tone, stealing it right out of Draco’s lap. The boy had nearly thrown himself across the common room at her as she hurried off with it. “I bet it’s a diary.” She giggled to herself. “Yeah, or he keeps secrets in there.” Crabbe added as he joined her. “That’s what a diary is, you dolt.”

“You wouldn’t understand.” Draco stormed towards the pair of them, his heart racing with fear as he watched Pansy teasingly open the cover of the book. However, much to Pansy’s surprise and even more so to Draco’s, there wasn’t a single word, not a single drop of ink, no markings, nothing. The book was completely empty. “You really carry around an empty book?” Pansy questioned, sceptical with her upper lip curled in disappointment. “What did you expect, my heartfelt feelings?” Draco scoffed, his tone cold and sarcastic as he snatched the book back from her, trying not to appear too hurt that his book had been handled roughly. “I’m to keep it safe. Father sent it to me.” Draco lied through his teeth, but thankfully, his lies were hard to detect, even for someone who knew Draco’s tactics to uphold his image and Pansy just pulled an expression that told him that she thought it was weird.

***

But now, as he sat in class, Draco could still see the small dent in the leather cover that Pansy had caused when she’d roughly stolen it from his grasp. He was still angry about it even a year later, perhaps it was irrational to be so annoyed about damage to a book, but this was special and he remembered how very upset he had felt that someone other than him had held the book. It was precious, vulnerable and he treasured it.

But it wasn’t just the book that he treasured. No, what he considered to be more important, more precious and something truly wonderful in every aspect was you. Which was why he had started to slowly distance himself from you. But as Draco looked up to see you sitting a few rows ahead of him in the middle of the classroom, the thing that reminded him of why he wanted to see you peeked out from under your jumper sleeve. Your hand was bandaged and Draco was quite angry with himself, because the night before when you had unknowingly written to him in your book and told him that a teacher had hurt you during detention, Draco had immediately known what it meant and he was livid.

“Attention, mister Malfoy.” Umbridge practically shrieked across the classroom, slamming her hand down onto the front desk, disturbing the Friday afternoon gloom and making everyone in the room jump at her sudden raised voice before she gave him a forced smile. Draco lazily sat up in his seat, eyes flitting to you every time Umbridge turned away to write or point at something on the blackboard as his mind wandered throughout the rest of the lesson.

When the class finally came to an end and Professor Umbridge excused you all to enjoy the rest of your Friday evening, Draco left the classroom and leaned against the wall outside until the very last person left the room.

Draco gave you a subtle smile before he very quickly peeked around the doorframe to see that Umbridge was climbing the stairs to her office before he turned to look at you and give you a proper smile. “I’m so sorry it’s been months, it’s bloody difficult with her around, it’s like she’s everywhere.” Draco sighed, rolling his eyes as he pushed away from the wall and shoved his hands into his pockets. “I understand, everyone is on high alert at the moment.” You replied in a quiet tone, almost too afraid to speak up as Draco began to walk you down the stairs, having avoided the eyes of all of your classmates and hopefully any spying caretakers too.

You were anxious to be spending time with Draco after all of this time. Especially as now he was part of the Inquisitorial Squad and part of you was afraid that your friends had been right last year. What if he did try to use you? But Draco had not yet betrayed your trust and you firmly believed in giving him the benefit of the doubt, you just hoped you weren’t doing it at your own expense.

“Come, we can talk in here.” Draco stepped into a hidden little alcove that was behind a statue at the side of the staircase. It was unlikely anyone would stop long enough to be able to hear you both talking and no one could see you hidden around the corner either.

“Was she hard on you yesterday?” Draco whispered his eyes softening as he watched you give him a little nod. “Yeah, a little.” You replied. “How did you know?” You queried, shyly looking up at him. “Pansy told me she caught you and Neville yesterday.” He explained and you just gave him a little nod. It wasn’t an outright lie, Pansy had told him she’d caught some students, but she never said who, it was only until you confided in your soulmate that it had happened that he knew you must have been in the group that Parkinson had caught. He watched as you slowly lifted your hand and pulled up your jumper sleeve to show him the bandage.

“Can I see?” Draco asked softly, gently taking your hand into both of his, holding you so softly like he was afraid he could hurt you with just his tender touch. You nodded, Draco leaning down to catch the way your eyes seemed to be filled with shame and you glanced at him, only for a second with a watery gaze.

Slowly and as carefully as he could, Draco unwrapped your bandage, reading the words that had been carved into your hand. “Oh love, I’m sorry, I should have been there to stop it from happening.” Draco sounded like he was scolding himself as he apologised, the emotions reaching his eyes as they swam deep in worry.

“It’s alright, I knew I’d end up in detention with her eventually.” You sighed, watching as Draco gently held your hand in his. He couldn’t lie and say it didn’t make his stomach turn horribly. It sickened him to no end and part of the reason he had joined the Inquisitorial Squad in the first place was with the hopes that he might be able to protect you better from that position. Not that he would let on to that, though.

“Does it hurt still?” He asked. “It still stings a bit and it’s sore.” You told him, your eyes saddened as you looked down at the writing you had tried so hard to conceal all day, not just because you were ashamed of what Umbridge had done, but because you simply could not bear to look at it. Would it always be there? You wondered if it would serve as a constant reminder and you hoped that with time that it would fade, but you couldn’t help the worry that sat deep in your stomach that the mark would remain long after healing and you hoped at the very least, that it would not make your stomach turn every time you looked at it.

“I’m so sorry.” Draco sighed, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to the back of your hand, his eyes looking up to meet yours as you let a shy, watery smile take over. You hoped not to cry, but Umbridge and her punishment was still very fresh in your mind and you felt a horrible chill roll through you whenever you thought of it. Merlin only knew how you had managed to make it through your lesson with her without it affecting you terribly.

“I’m so sorry I haven’t been here, but I’m here now.” Draco whispered it so quietly as he pulled you against his side. He hated that he couldn’t promise it wouldn’t happen again. Draco hated that he couldn’t stop Umbridge from hurting you and part of him hated himself for how weak he was for you. Did you find it strange that he was so apologetic? That he was almost loving towards you? But the worry seemed to slip from his mind when he felt you lean against him. It was moments like this that made Draco question himself. He questioned if he should continue to create distance between you, or if keeping you close was easier to keep you safe. And he questioned things like if he should find a way to help you realise that he was your soulmate like he had worked out two years ago. But he was afraid. Draco was starting to feel like that was beginning to be all too common for him to feel these days as things became more intense. The pressure from his father to do increasingly worse things that simply did not align with Draco’s morals was enough to twist his mind and now with working under Umbridge, he hoped it did not skew his true alignment and morality. It was this that he was fighting so hard to keep, because it was the one thing he could control when everyone else was insistent on pushing him into the directions they wanted him to go in.

What you didn’t know though, was that your friendship, his connection with you was more than just that to Draco. When he was around you, he didn’t feel like he had to cling on to who he was and put a mask on. He could just be himself and it relieved some of the tension and the fear.

But the question begged itself again. Am I too close to her?

“You know, Draco.” You broke the silence, the Slytherin humming in response, prompting you to continue. “Sometimes I feel like I’ve known you for years.” You told him. And while it was somewhat true, you had known him since you both had started Hogwarts, you never really knew him until recently. Without even knowing what lay deeper in your connection to Draco, you could feel something there, you felt drawn to him.

That’s because you have, he thought. “I know what you mean. I’ve felt the same too.” Draco replied with a soft smile, only he really did know what you meant, more than you did and he wished he could tell you.

“We should go.” Draco spoke, almost in a regretful tone as he carefully and gently bandaged your hand back up. He hated that he had so little time with you, but he was thankful at least, that you were not against spending time with him. Stepping forwards, Draco checked the stairwell. “There’s no one around.” He reassured you. “See you soon.” Draco smiled sweetly at you. “I hope so.” You nodded, mirroring his smile before you stepped out of the alcove and made your way down the stairs quickly, Draco waiting several minutes before leaving, just in case.

The end of term was on it’s final stretch with one last exam to sit the following Monday for Defence Against the Dark Arts. But as the weekend came, you decided to spend at least some of it with the person you’d not been able to see nearly all year.

“Can I ask you something?” You broke the silence, Draco glancing over at you from his spot on the grass. You were both sat down by the lake, hidden by a bit of overgrown foliage and rocks. It was a part near the shore of the lake that not many people went to and it was perfect for spending a private moment with someone. “What is it?” He asked as he reached up to push his hair to the side.

“You’ll think it’s ridiculous.” You sighed, fiddling with the book that sat closed in your lap. “Nothing you say is ever ridiculous.” Draco said, looking over at you with a sweet smile and you felt yourself warm at his words. “Well in that case,” You paused, looking out over the horizon of the lake. “Do you believe in soulmates?” You posed the question as if you were terrified he’d tell you it was utter rubbish, but when you heard him give you a little hum as he thought about it, Draco leaned over a little, resting his hand on your arm to get your attention.

Meeting his gaze, his blue eyes softened when he saw how nervous you looked and he wondered if someone had told you that it was all an old wives tale.

You seemed to become more shy under his touch and Draco smiled to himself, feeling that it was sweet that you seemed to get so flustered whenever he touched you, even though it had very rarely happened.

“I do, I believe in soulmates.” He reassured you. Draco wanted, with every fibre of his being to show you his book, to tell you everything. But he didn’t. “Did someone tell you it was...” He trailed off. “Stupid? Yeah.” You huffed out. “Do you think there’s someone out there for us?” You asked, relaxing a little as Draco leaned down to gently grip your hand.

“I know there is.” Draco smiled softly.

Sometimes I wonder if I already know you, you wrote. Perhaps we do know each other, but we won’t know until we reach the end of this book, he wrote only moments later. The trundle of the train rolling over the tracks began to lull you into a sleepy state as you sat in a mostly empty carriage on the Hogwarts Express. It was the end of term and while too much had really happened for you to fully compartmentalize and process it all yet, you took solace in knowing that you could figuratively lean on your soulmate for comfort.

You told him everything you felt, almost like a journal and in turn he did the same. He detailed his thoughts, his feelings and he came to you when his day had been too much, but neither of you were too specific. You wished you knew who he was so that you could give him physical comfort, so you could both lean on each other and you wished for this even more so now that you started to wonder if you already knew him.

I promise I’ll write to you as often as I can. You scribbled it down into the book. But there came no answer. And days after you had arrived in London and returned home for the holidays, there was still no response.

If only Draco could tell you what had happened. If only he could write to you and explain it all from beginning to end. But he had no idea if he could, because his only way of communicating with you was no longer in his possession.

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[some-kindofgnome]

Kinktober #14: The Spirit of Competition: Eijirou Kirishima

You’re hunched over a window booth at Denny’s when Kirishima asks you to sit on his face.

 Characters: Eijirou Kirishima / f!Reader

Warnings: smut (18+ please!), aged-up characters, face-sitting, oral sex (m&f receiving), sixty-nine, lil bit of Sunday morning fluff

Notes: Thank you, everyone, for accompanying me on yesterday’s feels trip. Today we’re back to our regularly scheduled programming-porn, porn, porn. Kirishima porn. Today’s prompt is “Sixty-Nine.” I can’t help but think that Pro Hero Kirishima would make the best boyfriend.

Kinktober Masterlist

You’re hunched over a window booth at Denny’s when Kirishima asks you to sit on his face.

It’s eleven-thirty p.m. on a Wednesday, but you’re wolfing down a plate of eggs and bacon like a Sunday brunch champion. That is, until you choke on them.

“Right now?”

He’s blushing hard, but when you pop that question out, dislodging chunks of egg white from your lungs, he laughs. It’s the kind of relationship you’ve always had. Neither of you are very good at the whole filter thing, so at some point, you just stopped trying.

“Yeah, that’s it,” he replies with playful sarcasm. “I want you to sit on my face right here, in the middle of a twenty-four hour…” He trails off, his voice hushing immediately as your exhausted-looking waitress approaches. She looks like she pulled the short straw on working the night shift, but she’s trying her best.

“Everything tasting good so far?”

You choke all over again, and Kirishima saves the moment by shooting the waitress his charming pro-hero smile. Sometimes you hate how good he is at this sort of thing, but at this point, you can only appreciate it.

“It’s all perfect,” he assures her, then gestures in your direction. “Could she get a water, please?”

You shoot him a narrow glare, all the while wondering if the poor server overheard any of your conversation on the way over. If she did, she’s doing a miraculous job of hiding it.

Fortunately, Kirishima’s ever-so-delicately worded request doesn’t come to fruition until a few weeks later, on an actual Sunday morning (sans brunch). You had been out late the night before at some kind of benefit with his agency- black tie, way too much champagne. Today, you’re determined to stay in bed as long as possible.

Midmorning sun pours across your sheets like hot butterscotch, warming your toes and kissing your shoulder blades. You’ve been awake for the better part of an hour- so has Kiri- but you’re both too comfortable holding one another to move.

Or, at least, you think you are. Until Kirishima starts kissing his way down the side of your neck and sending hot puffs of breath across your chest.

“Never gonna get tired a’ wakin’ up with you in my bed,” he growls against your skin, and you cast your eyes to the ceiling, grinning like the hungover idiot you are.

So it’s like that.

He starts slipping further down your body, trailing his lips to your collarbone. He’s starting to work his way down the length of your sternum. You have a flashback. The window booth at Denny’s. You, choking on fried egg. Kirishima, smooth as ever.

“Hang on,” you murmur, stopping him with a hand to the shoulder. He sits back on his haunches. You lick your lips and wonder if you’ve made a mistake.

“Wanna try it… the other way?” Your proposal is quiet but he catches every word. And now it’s his turn to grin at you.

“Babe,” he gasps. “You remembered.”

You resist the urge to roll your eyes. Barely. But he’s already moving, kicking off the sheets and laying back against the pillows. He pats his chest, still grinning.

“Hop on.”

“Oh my god.” This time, you can’t resist the urge.

You sit up- ignoring the protest from your sleepy limbs- and swing your thigh over his shoulders with your back facing the headboard. Kirishima’s breath tickles the insides of your thighs and you shiver, losing your nerve.

“This feels…” you start to say, but then he slides his palms over your thighs and urges you slowly downward.

“Don’t worry, baby,” he croons, sleep-hoarse. His grin taints every syllable. “I gotcha.”

As he pulls your hips against his face, his shoulders press into the mattress and he holds you at the perfect spot. You’re not sure what to do with your hands, but you feel as safe and secure as you always do with him.

He’s good at that sort of thing- putting you at ease.

“Fuck,” he rumbles between your legs. “Y’smell so sweet down here. Can’t wait to-“ He cuts himself off, swiping the flat of his tongue along your slit. You gasp. You bite your lip. You try not to squirm too hard.

You realize that, with the sheets kicked from the mattress, his bare form is completely exposed to you. You gorge yourself, taking in his thick thighs and his firm abs, dusted with a that short, dark bristle of hair you spend way too much time thinking about. All leading to his cock, beginning to twitch and stiffen already from the taste of you.

Your attention is forced back to the movement between your legs by a particularly low spike, making your breath catch and your shoulders pitch forward. Your hands shoot out, bracing against Kirishima’s thighs as he continues to hold you fast.

He groans into your body and his cock stirs again, thickening fast while he swirls his tongue against your clit. He’d started out a little awkward- everything is backward, from this angle- but he’s finding his rhythm and starting to send little shakes of pleasure up your spine.

But you can’t stop thinking about his cock.

It’s right there. Completely hard now, flushed and curving perfectly against his belly, tempting you. Every time you lean in close you feel him shift and groan underneath you.

You give in.

Leaning in, you wrap your fingers around his shaft. He starts a little but doesn’t dare break his rhythm- lucky you- and you lower your head, sucking the tip of his cock into your mouth.

“Fuck,” he grunts against you. His hips buck into your mouth.

Okay. You’re really doing this.

You keep your hand wrapped firmly around the base of his shaft and start to suck, bobbing up and down on his cock like you’re on your knees for him. It’s hard to keep your concentration when he’s still working away between your thighs, but you’re providing the same challenge to him all the while.

What began as a game morphs into a competition as the two of you devour one another, racing to see who can drive the other to ecstasy first. Kirishima’s had a head start, but you don’t let that stop you. You swallow him as best you can, sucking and bobbing messily away. He’s starting to twitch and squirm underneath you and it echoes in the pit of your own stomach.

There are no words exchanged between you, both mouths too busy to break away. Kirishima cums first, grunting hard into your pussy as his stomach tightens and his hips rut hard. You keep your mouth on him, letting him shoot every spurt of cum down your throat. As soon as he’s finished, though, you have to pull away, because you’ve hit your peak, too.

“Kiri,” you whine, throwing your head back and rolling your hips into his face. He laps eagerly at your clit, amplifying the dull flutters of your orgasm into powerful shockwave. You grab his thighs and squeeze tightly as you cum, riding out the waves against his powerful jaw.

When it’s over, he gently eases you off him and you collapse together in a puddle of mutual ecstasy.

“That was… kind of unexpected,” he mumbles at the ceiling. You look over and he’s still smiling. Your Sunday morning sunshine.

“Couldn’t help it,” you giggle. “You were tempting me.”

“Well,” he chuckles, rolling onto his side and pulling you into his arms. “I’ll tempt you again. Any time you want.”

“How about you tempt me with a little coffee?”

You expect him to say something sassy, but to your surprise, he just kisses the top of your head.

“Sure thing, baby.”

#kirishima x reader #eijirou kirishima x reader #kirishima/reader #kirishima/you #kirishima #eijirou kirishima #my hero academia #mha fanfic #kinktober #jbbkinktober2020

[outrunningthedark]

Question: what do you like and dislike about how CP is portrayed in 911? Ofc ignore this if youre uncomfortable answering, I'm just curious.

Props to you for this ask, nonnie! I will gladly answer it. Before I continue, please keep in mind that my perspective is based on these three factors: - Christopher is the son of a first responder, not an actual first responder, so his limited screen time plays a part in how much the writers can focus on his CP. - Christopher is ten or eleven at this point in canon, meaning certain things I would like to watch unfold wouldn't make sense unless he was a little older.

- Though Christopher (Gavin) and I both have CP, the way in which it influences our daily lives is different. For instance, I do not have the ability to use crutches or walk short distances without assistance, so our needs are not always going to match up, nor will our experiences when navigating the outside world. Now that we've got that out of the way: What I'm to say is no secret: I *like* how BOTH Eddie and Shannon have been portrayed. Eddie reenlisting when he finds out Christopher is going to need extra medical attention and referring to CP as an "illness"... He's not the first or the last parent who avoids the elephant in the room. I talk about my mother a lot more than my father, but my father is very much like Eddie was during Christopher's infancy - he doesn't like to discuss my CP, if I "complain" about something I struggle with he'll pretend he can't hear me, if I tell him I accomplished something that was very difficult, he won't say "great job" or "I'm proud of you", and he's always been like this. Obviously I'm not in his head, but it would seem as though acknowledging my CP means acknowledging that I'm "different". My father was also the parent that stayed away from hospitals whenever he could. "Tina's got a doctor's appointment at 1:00 next Wednesday." "I can't get out of work, sorry." The scene where Shannon is tearing into Eddie for not being with her at Christopher's appointments is extremely real and relatable for me. Shannon putting herself on a pedestal, particularly in Eddie Begins, is true to life. I'm not going to say ALL mothers of disabled children do it because I don't know ALL of them, but reminding Eddie just how hard she's worked to care for their son is nothing new. I will say that I was born to a mother who never had the opportunity to quit a job and stay home with me because my family needed all the money we could get. Sooo...imagine how much more insufferable Shannon could/would be if she was forced to juggle motherhood and work. One thing I wish we could have gotten in a flashback from Eddie Begins is a scene where Shannon & Eddie learn about Christopher's CP, or maybe Shannon tries explaining the disability during their argument. IMO, it would have been beneficial to provide some context for viewers who don't know what CP is, what it means. I appreciate that Christopher's CP is not the basis for his characterization, don't get me wrong. We're more than our disability (or disabilities) and we deserve the same respect as those who are able-bodied. HOWEVER. A teacher makes an ableist remark and Eddie didn't call her out on it? I understand he was working through his own shit, but MAYBE had Eddie acted "offended" beyond "I'm sorry?" the Ana apologist crowd would have a better understanding of why what she said is not even a little bit helpful. ...And that brings me back to Shannon. I do NOT like that the writers were so determined to make her seem "sympathetic" that Eddie just...let her say the grossest things about her son's disability. The scene where she's hating herself for "making" her kid end up with CP, and crying as she admits she needed a break because taking care of Christopher was "exhausting"... Eddie had to tell her she "did nothing wrong", when really he could have/should have said something about her hypocrisy and the way she viewed HER SON. Do people realize the mind games she played on Eddie back in the day? Christopher needs his father! That "six year old" Eddie was referring to is "your son"! Shannon guilt tripped him AND IT WORKED. She runs away the minute Eddie is back in Christopher's life and it's *justified* because Eddie believed every bad thing she ever said. He failed his wife. He failed his son. He got what he deserved. I wish we could have gotten more insight into Eddie's efforts re: Christopher adjusting to their new life in LA. We had the conversation between Buck and Maddie, which, combined with Buck seeking help from Carla, was a way to foreshadow how connected the Buckley-Diaz family was going to become. Love it. (Of course I do.)

Personally? I would have liked at least one discussion between Buck and Eddie about trying to circumvent "giant bureaucracies". The able-bodied have no fucking clue what it takes. I like the opening montage of Stuck (we all do). One part that always sticks with me is Christopher whispering "Finally!" when he gets his sock on all by myself because THAT IS REAL. The EUPHORIA we feel when we accomplish something in five minutes that would take an able-bodied person all of five seconds is immeasurable and indescribable. Look at us being independent! We've still got it! The scene with Abuela that followed is equally as important. Telling Eddie to help Christopher by carrying him to the door is well-meaning, because she doesn't want her grandson to tire himself out, but Eddie's response is wonderful. "He wants to do it." - Eddie doesn't want to make his son rethink his capabilities, doesn't want him to think Eddie's lost confidence in him. What I don't like? Christopher is portrayed as this Perfect Child who never complains. And when I say "complains" I mean... can this kid say he's tired once? Can he say his legs are hurting? Anything? Nope. Everything's great. He's the best. THAT IS NOT REAL LIFE. We're allowed to be tired. We're allowed to ask for help. It's not going to make him less lovable if he has a hard time doing a simple task because we never know when our muscles are not going to cooperate. . . . This is so disorganized and extensive and it's only a fraction of my thoughts, tbh. If anyone has anymore specific questions, you know where to find me!

#anonymous #tv: 911 #tv: 9-1-1 #christopher diaz #eddie diaz #shannon diaz

[ilovefandoms102]

Taking Chances-Part 3*

Pairing: College!Drew Starkey x Plus Size!Reader

Summary: The basketball star seeks help from the girl he’s been crushing on for two years…will she reciprocate his feelings?

Note: I am so in love with this man it’s not even funny...🥺 

I have missed writing this series and now I have so many ideas so I’m so excited to have this for you guys! I hope everyone enjoys!

The parts in italics are flashbacks! 

Click here to be apart of my taglist

Part 2 Part 4

=====================================

After that night, Drew and I spent every waking moment together…

I couldn’t get enough of him, he was so incredibly sweet to me, and the biggest teddy bear. He will never admit this, but he loves being the little spoon. The past two months we have been dating have honestly been the best days of my life. 

However, people seemed to have a staring problem when we were together on campus. Drew paid no mind to it, his eyes either on me or talking to one of his teammates. They constantly teased Drew about how he hasn’t shut up about me since he first saw me our freshman year, and it seemed to have become worse now that we were together. I thought it was adorable, but Drew’s cheeks always turned a deep shade of pink anytime it was brought up. 

“Baby it’s cute,” I told him one day as we sat in class after we had escaped another round of his teammates teasing him. 

“It makes me sound like a creep,” he protested, arm slung behind my chair that he had scooted as close to him as possible. 

“No it doesn’t, it’s sweet.” I pouted, reaching out to rub his cheek. 

He leaned his elbow on the table, head resting in his large hand. His eyes swept over me, causing my thoughts to become self conscious as I squirmed in my seat. I looked everywhere but at him, turning back to face the front of the class. I saw him in my peripheral leaning towards my ear. 

“You look so beautiful today.” He whispered, kissing my cheek. I flushed as I looked down at myself, wearing one of his sweatshirts and a pair of leggings with my hair down in its natural state, and minimal makeup with my glasses perched on my nose. 

“Drew...I literally look like a trash can.” I chuckled, glancing at his almost hurt expression. 

“Stop that, you’re hot as fuck.” He smirked, pinching my thigh playfully. 

I giggled as I pushed his hand away, instead he intertwined our fingers and kept them on top of my thigh. Drew glanced to see if the professor was paying attention before quickly placing a kiss to my lips, taking me by surprise. I blinked in shock, looking over to my giant boyfriend. 

“What was that for?” I asked, still shocked. 

“Just ‘cause I wanted to kiss my beautiful girlfriend.” He shrugged, winking before turning back to listen to the professor. 

=====================================

Drew lived in the dorms on campus, meaning no privacy if we ever wanted to hang out. This made me very appreciative to my parents that helped me find the apartment I have to myself. In the last few months, Drew had practically moved himself in. 

Of course I didn’t mind at all...he was good eye candy. Besides that, he actually helped around my apartment which I found odd since no guy I know would voluntarily do the dishes or run the vacuum. It honestly made me fall even harder for the basketball super star. 

“Hey baby, holy shit it smells amazing in here.” Drew called, walking in my apartment from practice. 

I was occupied in the kitchen, whipping up some dinner for the both of us. Drew sat his duffel bag by the washer, no doubt more clothes in it that he needed washed. The washer and dryer on campus was outrageously expensive, and since I have a washer and dryer I just told Drew to bring his clothes here. Drew walked up behind me, wrapping his very sweaty body around mine. 

“Drew go take a shower, you’re ruining the aesthetic.” I huffed, trying to push his arms from around me, but he was too strong. 

“Well excuse me, I have not seen my girlfriend all day and I would like to love on her.” Drew said matter of factly. 

“You see her everyday,” I giggled, they intensified when Drew started placing ticklish kisses on my neck. 

“I know, but I didn’t see her today.” He pouted, his large frame completely engulfing mine. 

“Well you smell like shit, so off to the shower with you.” I ordered, shooing his hands away that seemed to have traveled back to my ass. 

“Fine, fine you win this time.” Drew sighed, laying a smack to my behind before disappearing down the hall. 

=====================================

Drew came back a few minutes later, fresh out of the shower in just a pair of basketball shorts hung low on his hips. It took everything in me to not jump him right then and there, and he knew it too by the look he gave me. 

“See something you like princess?” He asked smugly, flexing his muscles on purpose. 

“No,” I quipped, turning back to turn the stove burners off since dinner was done. 

Drew snatched my hand, yanking me to his chest. I gasped, placing my hands on his abdomen to keep me from falling. He circled his arms around me, one hand staying on my waist while the other tangled into my hair. I moaned softly when he tugged on the strands a little, his smile bright at my reaction. 

“I think you saw something you liked sweetheart,” Drew smirked, eyes falling to my lips that were slightly parted. 

“Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t.” I teased, the hands I had placed on his abs beginning to wander. His fist tugged my hair harder, my teeth biting down on my bottom lip to stop the squeal I was about to let out. 

“Such a brat,” he growled, his blue eyes darkening. 

“You love it though, don’t you baby?” I grinned, tracing my fingertips along the waistband of his shorts. 

“Fuck yeah I do,” he said as he leaned down to smash his lips to mine. 

I finally let out the moan I was holding in, my hands moving to thread them through his damp hair. I let my tongue out to play with his, both of us fighting for dominance over the other. He ultimately won, but not willingly on my part. Drew’s big hands gripped my ass cheeks in a death grip, a slight grunt passing his lips as he used his hold to pull me in closer. 

“Th-The foods gonna get cold,” I panted as I pulled away, chest heaving. 

“I want to kiss you,” Drew stated, leaning back down for another kiss. 

“But-baby-Drew-“ I tried, but was interrupted as Drew kept kissing me. 

“Eat later, kiss now.” he mumbled against my lips, my smile growing as I gave in to his request.

=====================================

“So there’s a frat party this weekend, and I was really hoping you would be my date.” Drew spoke as we cleaned up the kitchen. 

“Sure, I’ve never been to a frat party,” I shrugged, handing him another dish to dry. 

“You’re not missin’ much trust me.” He chuckled. 

“Then why do you want to go?” I asked, genuinely curious. 

“Because now I have a beautiful woman to show off.” He winked, making my cheeks flush. 

“You think you’re smooth Starkey,” I laughed. 

“Oh I know I’m smooth baby, that’s how I landed such an amazing girlfriend.” Drew smiled, leaning down to kiss my red cheek. 

“Yeah sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.” I dismissed, rolling my eyes playfully. 

“You help me sleep at night gorgeous.” he smirked, leaning down to kiss my cheek. I shoved his head away with my wet hand, giggling as he looked at me like I had ruined his favorite jersey. 

“What are you gonna do about it Starkey?” I taunted, beaming as Drew picked up some of the water and splashed me.

“That’s what smartass,” he countered, laughing as I gasped when the water hit me. 

“Oh it’s on,” I grinned evilly, throwing more water at him. 

Drew and I continued our little splash fight until my kitchen was covered in soapy water, Drew holding on to me so I didn’t fall but also so he had the advantage to get my hair and clothes soaked. I tried to get away, shoving at his chest, but to no avail he kept me in his arms. 

“Drew stop!” I squealed, his laughter making my heart flutter.

“You asked for it!” he shouted, squeezing a rag over my head.

“You better clean up this mess mister!” I yelled, giggling as he picked up a few more soap bubbles to put on my face.

“Now this, this is sexy.” Drew chuckled, my eyes rolling as I hit his chest playfully.

“Stooooop, now I need to go shower.” I giggled, leaning my head back to look at him.

“I should join you, ya know to make sure u get all the soap out.” He grinned slyly, hands traveling over my form. 

“In your dreams Starkey,” I whispered, kissing the corner of his lips before heading to the shower.

“Brat,” he growled, his eyes glued to me as I walked away. 

=====================================

The one thing I loved the most about Drew is-

Wait...did I just-did I just think love?

Wow...I couldn’t tell you the last time I had that kind of thought…

Anywho, Drew wasn’t one of those guys that pressured sex. The past few boyfriends I had always made me feel like I just had to give in, like it was my duty as a woman to please them. 

Sure Drew and I loved to tease each other, but he made it very clear that we were on my terms when it came to anything sexual. I’d be lying if I said that didn’t make my heart flutter. I truly, truly felt like Drew and I could last, or at least I hoped to. 

“I want you to feel completely safe with me, no rushing or jumping into anything you’re not ready for.” He explained, snuggled up against me in my tiny, queen size bed. 

“I do feel safe with you teddy bear,” I grinned, his eye roll at the nickname making me laugh. 

“I mean in the sense of talking about anything and everything, no lies, and no secrets.” He continued, gently brushing his finger along my features. 

“I can do that,” I agreed, running my fingers through his hair. 

“You-You don’t feel pressured to do anything just because I insinuate it right?” He questioned, a frown forming on his beautiful face. 

“No baby I don’t, I know you’re just teasing, and I like it. If I didn’t, I would tell you.” I reassured, kissing his nose to which he smiled at. 

“I’m in for the long run sweetheart, you ready for that?” He smirked, his arms going around my back to pull me impossibly closer. 

“I am,” I said nervously, feeling a lump in my throat. 

“Good, because I don’t plan on going anywhere and I won’t let you push me away.” He revealed, my heart thumping a million miles a minute. 

“Drew,” I whispered, feeling my whole body flood with emotion. 

“I feel different with you y/n, like everything feels so real. I-I’ve never felt the way I feel when I’m with you.” Drew confessed, my eyes filling with happy tears that I forced back down. 

“I feel that way too teddy bear,” I smiled, slowly caressing his cheek. 

Drew leaned forward slowly, kissing my lips gently. I threaded my fingers in his hair, smiling into his kiss. 

“Thank you,” he mumbled into my lips. I pulled back a little, looking at him confused. 

“For what?” I asked. 

“Taking a chance on me,” he smiled, kissing me again. 

I deepened our kiss, feeling my body ignite with fire and passion. Drew’s hands stayed firm, one underneath me threaded into my damp hair, and the other on my hip. His fingers felt the curve and dip, squeezing lightly which made my heart flutter. 

I had one hand holding his cheek, the other making its way from his hip bone and slowly creeping it under the wife beater he was wearing. I felt the ripple of muscles on his abdomen, tracing under his pecs. Then I felt my way to his back, smoothing my hands up and down as our kiss intensified. 

Drew abruptly sat up, yanking the fabric over his head then tossed it on the floor. My chest was heaving from lack of air, his doing the same. I grabbed his shoulders, pulling him to hover over me as I laid on my back. 

“Drew?” I panted, pulling away to look into his eyes. 

“Yeah? Am I going too fast?” He asked, his eyes filling with concern. 

“No, I just wanted to tell you that-that I want you to touch me-like...everywhere.” I stammered, my cheeks heating up slightly. 

I didn’t wait for his response however, reaching for the back of his neck to bring his lips back to mine. Drew moaned softly, sending shivers down my spine. It was the sexiest sound I ever heard, and I wanted more. 

His hands explored more of my body, taking both my breasts in his large hands. I wasn’t wearing a bra since we were originally planning to go to bed, so he was pleasantly surprised to not feel the cups of the bra. 

Drew grazed his thumbs over my nipples, a gasp flying from my lips as the exquisite feeling went straight down below. He moved his kisses down my neck, softly stroking my nipples that pebbled through my shirt. I let out a moan of my own when he gently sucked on a spot behind my ear, leaving his mark on my untarnished skin. 

“More,” I whimpered, moving one leg between his so I could grind my lower half on his thigh. 

“Ask nicely,” Drew murmured in my ear, and I could feel his smirk against my skin. 

“Let me have it,” I demanded, but my brattiness only got me a low growl from Drew. 

His hands came to my hips to stop my movements, a child like whine leaving my throat. I tried to fight his grip which only made his hands hold me tighter. 

“Brats don’t get what they want babygirl, you know this.” He reprimanded, laughing maliciously as I struggled to free myself. 

“Please,” I muttered, giving in. 

“What was that?” He teased, a frustrated groan escaping as I tugged at his hair. 

“Please Drew, please I need more.” I said a bit louder, a satisfied hum from Drew as he helped guide my hips to grind against him. 

I could feel his hardened member against my thigh, Drew’s low grunts in my ear making me even more hot as he was getting off just as I was. We both rutted up against each other, moans and whimpers from us filling the room. 

“Fuck this is so hot,” Drew moaned, making my head nod in agreement. His blue eyes almost black from lust, pupils blown wide as they stared into mine. 

“Feels so good baby,” I replied, my eyes closing as I could feel my release coming. 

“I’m gonna cum, fuck.” Drew growled, grinding both of our hips faster. 

“Me too,oh my god.” I gasped, my clit throbbing against his thigh. 

My back arched as my orgasm crashed down, stars flooding my vision. My nails dug into his shoulders, his head falling in my neck as his hips stuttered and his movement halted all together. I could feel the wet patch against my leg, making me smile slightly as I gasped for air. 

We laid there for a minute, not moving from our position other than Drew dropped to lay on top of me. I combed my hands through his now sweaty hair, his lips placing gentle kisses on my neck where his head was currently buried. 

“I need to change my pants,” Drew blurted, a giggle bursting from my lips. 

“I need new shorts,” I smirked, shuffling a little on the bed. 

“Can I tell you something?” Drew questioned, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. 

“Of course you can babe,” I chuckled, gently caressing his cheeks. 

“I’ve been dying to know what you taste like,” he blurted, my eyes widening and teeth sinking into my bottom lip. 

“Maybe you could have a sample,” I said barely above a whisper. 

“Can I?” He asked, fingers dragging down my stomach. 

I nodded, keeping eye contact as his hand dipped in my shorts. He scooped up my cum, being careful to not touch any sensitive areas. I stared downwards as his hand ascended to his mouth, sticking his two fingers he used inside. His eyes closed as he sucked his fingers clean, letting out a spine chilling moan that made me want to strip and let him have his way with me.

“How was it?” I smirked, eyes still connected with his mouth. 

He took his fingers from his mouth, wiping them on my shirt. I could see his tongue moving around in his mouth as if he was trying to savor every last drop. His eyes met mine, a sly smile forming as his lips came closer and closer to mine. 

“Delicious,” he murmured against my lips, and I leaned the rest of the way to connect them. 

=====================================

I met Drew at the frat house on Saturday, it was a pool party so I was a bit hesitant to be around everyone in a bikini. Drew was very convincing and talked me into just wearing it under my clothes so that if I didn’t want to I didn’t have to. I chose a higher cut bikini to show off his favorite body part of mine with a more plunging neckline. I wore one of his basketball shirts with his name on the back tucked into some distressed jeans with flip flops. 

“Hey baby!” Drew greeted, already in his swim shorts which hung low just enough to make every girl here wonder what’s underneath. 

I smiled wide as I came closer, his adorable grin making my heart soar. I was surprised though when he reached me and bent his knees with his hands on my hips to pick me up. I squeaked a little, not expecting it, but I liked it. I wrapped my legs tightly around him, holding onto his shoulders. I was even more surprised when he leaned in and kissed me in front of everyone. 

“That was some greeting Starkey,” I giggled as I pulled away, wiping some of the lip gloss that had smeared off his lip. His big hands squeezed my ass cheeks, another round of giggles erupting. 

“I like the ass L/n,” he commented, winking as he kept his hold on them. 

“I like the muscles baby,” I said as I felt his broad shoulders and chest. 

“You look so beautiful,” he murmured, tightening his hold on my ass. 

“You’re too sweet teddy bear,” I gushed, pinching his cheeks. 

“Damn bro, how your arms not broken?” One of the frat brothers asked, my heart stopping as I looked from him to Drew whose expression morphed into one of anger. 

“Drew,” I warned, but he ignored me and sat me back on my feet. 

“What the fuck did you just say?” Drew questioned, shoving me behind him. I grabbed his hand and used my other to grab his bicep, not wanting a fight to break out. 

“I’m just sayin’ man she thick and all but damn.” The boy scoffed, looking me up and down behind Drew. 

“Insult my girlfriend again, I fucking dare you.” Drew taunted angrily, taking a step closer. I pulled on his arm, hoping to get his attention back to me. 

“Drew it’s ok, he was just dropped on his head as a child and doesn’t appreciate what a real woman looks like.” I sassed, raising a brow at the boy. 

I didn’t give him a chance to reply however, pulling Drew towards one of the pool chairs. I stripped my clothes in front of him, his eyes widening at the sight of my bikini. I smirked as his eyes traveled up and down my body, lingering on the curves of my hips. I turned around to purposefully give him a view of the back, my heart jumping at the curse that left his lips.

“What?” I asked, grinning when his eyes snapped back to mine.

“You’re...you’re stunning, absolutely gorgeous.” he breathed, his hands coming to wind around me and pull me to his chest. 

“I figured you’d like it,” I shrugged, his head shaking as he smiled down at me.

“Let’s get in,” he chuckled, intertwining our fingers and pulling me with him to the pool.

=====================================

The frat brother that felt the need to make that comment earlier kept eyeing Drew and I, making him tense up against me. I moved to stand in front of him, wrapping my arms around him.

“You should have let me deck that guy,” Drew grunted, his hands going to my hips to pull me closer.

“He’s not worth it Drew,” I sighed, placing my hands on his cheeks and gently pull so his eyes would come back to mine.

“I don’t like it, he had no right.” Drew huffed, scrunching his eyebrows. 

“Let’s not think about it ok? I want to have fun with you.” I smiled softly, getting up on my toes to kiss him. Drew flashed a small grin, holding me closer to him. 

A little while later, the frat guy was completely forgotten. Drew and I were completely wrapped up in each other. We couldn’t keep our hands to ourselves which earned lots of stares from the other girls trying hard to get him to look their way. 

Drew pulled me to a corner of the deep end of the pool, Drew being so tall his shoulders were still above the water. He wrapped my legs around his waist, but his fingers stayed wandering on my private area of my bikini. I gasped in surprise, looking around to see if anyone would notice.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish Starkey,” I grumbled, gripping his biceps. 

“I’m not doing anything babydoll,” Drew said innocently, but with a shit eating grin on his face.

“Drew,” I whispered, his fingers moving my bikini bottoms to the side.

I stared deep into his eyes, blinking rapidly as his fingers slowly caressed me. I bit down on my bottom lip, trying hard to conceal my moans. 

“So pretty,” he murmured, leaning to place a gentle kiss to my lips.

The moment was ruined however when some of Drew’s teammates yelled for him.

“Hey yo Starkey! Wanna shoot some hoops?” they called, Drew turning to look at them before back to me. 

“Go on, I’ll be here.” I said, already missing the feel of his fingers as he moved my bottoms back.

“I won’t play for long ok?” he smiled, giving me a gentle kiss before heading out of the pool.

=====================================

I couldn’t help but stare the way Drew moved as he played, his coordination so flawless. He was going places, that I was sure of. Other girls of course walked by him, making sure they were in his line of sight with their tiny bikinis that barely left anything to the imagination, but Drew didn’t spare them one glance. 

As soon as he was done, he came to the edge of the pool and jumped back in. I turned my face away giggling, beaming as he resurfaced so his face was right in front of mine. I returned to my earlier position with my legs wrapped around him, a mischievous act forming in my brain. I trailed my fingers down his abdomen and lower, tracing the band of his swim shorts. I bravely grabbed his halfway hardened dick, feeling it pulsate in my hand.

“Baby,” he growled, his hands gripping my hips tight. 

“Hmmm?” I questioned, batting my lashes at him.

“Quit,” he griped, but made no move to stop me.

“I think you like it though sweetheart,” I winked, palming him a bit harder.

“I don’t want to get out of this pool hard as a rock.” Drew groaned, throwing his head back before coming back to meet my eyes. Our moment was yet ruined again by some of the cheerleaders.

“Hey Drew come dance with us!” they giggled, he went to respond until I squeezed him dick harder.

“Sorry ladies, he’s taken.” I fake smiled, waving my free hand at them. They glared at me before scurrying off, my attention turning back to Drew. 

“So possessive,” Drew teased, his hands moving to squeeze my ass.

“You love it,” I giggled, taking my hand away from his member to wrap them around his neck.

“It’s sexy as fuck,” Drew nodded excitedly, leaning down to plant a sweet kiss to my lips.

After a moment of us just staying like that, the party started to die down.

“You ready to get out of here babe?” Drew asked, my head nodding as I was eager to have him all to myself.

“Let’s go home,” I murmured, squealing moments after as he carried me out of the pool and to the pool chair where our stuff was sitting.

This giant man of mine just may be the key to mending my broken pieces...

=====================================

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