#i am high on caffeine

[cause-i-am-a-mastermind]

not to be a crazy swiftie, but i have a theory about midnights....

it might not even be new, but it's new to me, okay?

i wanna say, that I don't know shit about Taylor-lore, all i know is just bits and bobs and the bops (haha), that's all the context i have.

if you observe the songs in order:

lavender haze - the start of the relationship, start of lover era. it's a new relatioship, he's so accepting of her and all the drama that was around her, she feels the lavender haze creeping up on her (lover album - baby blue and pink clouds, pink+blue=purple -> lavender haze) she's so in love that she doesn't even care what people are saying ("talk your talk and go viral, i just need this love spiral, get it off your chest, get it off my desk")

maroon - the start of the end, a happy memory in the present, but looking back, it's all shades of red. "Red" is a song, in which she describes love as red. she described the love she felt towards him as golden in Daylight. looking back to the happy memory, she realises that he might not be the one, although she still loves him. comparing red and maroon (with burgundy and the other shades she used) we can feel like she really grew up between the two songs, these darker shades of red feel more mature

anti-hero - it all ties back to being a people pleaser (as she called herself in her newly released song" you're losing me"), the relationship isn't working out, so she tries to find the problem in herself. what I'm unsure about is the identity of the anti-hero. is it Taylor who finds all the faults of the relationship rooting from her, or is it Joe, who does not even seem to notice them? it's also notable, that she didn't leave Joe inher will in the music video. they either already broke up, or she already lost faith in the relationship lasting much longer.

snow on the beach - it was a good night. she thought the spark between them was gone, but that night was different, and it gave her hope. it's weird, it's like a dream, something she didn't think would happen, just like seeing snow on the beach. "I can't speak, afraid to jinx it" it made her so happy to have the spark back, but she's scares to mention it, just in case.

you're on your own kid - this song is a bit different, it could be interpreted in completely different contexts, but it also feels like they started to spend time apart from eachother. she's still hopeful, and is still looking to change herself, in case she can save the relationship. but it's just not working out. the one she loved the most, the one she thought was THE ONE just isn't, she's feeling lost like she's all alone in this world.

midnight rain - i saw someone say this was actually from Joe's pov, and it kinda makes sense. maybe both character's are Joe. "he" is his younger self, maybe from before they met, the one, who was looking for a bride. but it all changed, he changed, just like a day changes to another when midnight hits, a completely new day, a new person. the "I" is his current self, the one who is only chasing fame, wanting to make his own name. the song shows, how Taylor feels it's her fault that he changed. Before he met her, it wasn't a problem, but once they started dating, he was known as Taylor Swift's boyfriend, so he wanted to make his own name. this wouldn't have happened, if it wasn't for Taylor, so she simply blames herself.

question...? - i might be just dumb for this, I don't see anything in this, might be about cheating, or just thinking about cheating??? idk. she might started to realize she can't keep blaming only herself

vigilante shit - she's just in her girlboss era, don't mind her, she's servinggg

bejeweled - she gave him everything, he gave nothing. she's a bad bitch and she shows it. she was less public during the relationship, but she's still bejeweled, she can still make the whole place shimmer. "i polish up real nice". he gave up his chance, of always being first, so he now has to "wait in line" - he didn't put her first, so why would she?

labyrinth - he's trying to win her back, and it's working, kind of, but she knows, she can't let go of her walls, despite that being what everyone expects of her

karma - this song is for anyone who wronged her, but there are three, who got a verse dedicated to them, and i believe the third might be for Joe "ask me what I learned from all those years, ask me what I earned from all those tears"

sweet nothing - finding the pebble brings back a memory, that he might not be the villain she made him to be. she might have realised, that she went to the other extreme, that instead of blaming it all on herself, she was blaming it all on him. but it's not like that, it's not black and white, they both had parts in why it didn't work out.

mastermind - she's thinking about how they met, and the fact, that she was pulling the strings, which is a romantic gesture, kind of, but it does feel a bit artificial. we all have this belief that meeting our soulmate just happens, it's supposed to be love at first sight, and she might be feeling like she ruined their chances by pulling some strings right at the start.

the bonus tracks don't seem to follow any chronological order.

the great war - it ties the songs together, it makes the story a whole. when the relationship started to fail, she had everything bottled inside of her. she fought her feelings alone, although he tried to be there for her, it was just feeding the fire. she was blaming him, and despite seeing the situation more clearly, it was the great war. their biggest fight, they couldn't just "plant a memory garden" and act as if nothing happened. "the worst was over" "we survived the great war" they thought this was a huge fight and it's over, but the first world war was also called the great war, until the second happened, so the song title was also foreshadowing another fight.

some people think Bigger than the whole sky describes a miscarriage. which would make a lot of sense, as that tends to have its toll on relationships.

paris - 'yeah, nothing bad happened, we were in paris, remember?' this might be about how the public had no clue about the hard patch they were experiencing, this is the version, that we heard, thinking everything is fine and they love eachother more than ever. "romance is not dead if you keep it just yours" - that's a fucking lie, their romance was literally dying, but they couldn't just say that

high infidelity - it's either about her cheating on him. or the fact, that his feeling were never as strong as hers "the slowest is never loving them enough". maybe april 29th is not the day she cheated, but the one, where she soent the whole time daydreaming about them being married (second verse)

glitch - it completely disregards how she described their meeting in Mastermind. they weren't supposed to become a thing, it just happened, it was just up to chance, that she wasn't "in someone else's playground". the whole relationship happened because of a glitch, she didn't want to have a serious relationship

dear reader - she's talking about her experiences and giving advice, but her main advice is "never take advice from someone who's falling apart" but she's the one falling apart, you shouldn't take her advice, because she's so hurt that she can't see straight ("you should find another") - at first it's just whispers, then at the end, she's the one who tells the "reader" that they should find someone else to take advice from

hits different - this song is after the breakup, but doesn't make it too obvious, but might be the reason it was not online until now. it's not easy for her to move on, because he wasn't just 'one of those Kens, she'd just ghost'. "now the sum burns my heart" this line is referencing Daylight (love is golden like daylight) - love is burning her heart. the breakup made her a mess, she's crying over objects, she goes on tangents about him, so she doesn't get invited anywhere anymore, she still hopes for him to come back

#taylor swift #midnights #midnights 3am #midnights 3am version #taylor swift midnights #am i reaching too far #am i reading too much into this? #you're losing me still needs to ripen in my brain #i love to read to much into things #it's like my hobby #proofreading is for losers #i hope I won't regret wasting 3 hours on this shit #i will probably get embarassed and private this #midnights theory #be honest should i check myself into the nearest mental institution? #I shouldn't have drank that coffee #i am high on caffeine

[yaoyuren]

magical wxs! 🎈🍬🌟🤖

#my art #project sekai #prsk fa #prsk #emurui #ruiemu #project sekai fanart #nenekasa #tsukanene #rui kamishiro #emu ootori #nene kusanagi #tsukasa tenma #i am so high on caffeine right now

[figsandphiltatos]

okay i've started watching fantasy high: junior year and it's . So Good so far. but i just have to take a moment to gush about how exciting riz is as aro rep???

like this is junior year, all his friends are applying to colleges, and he wants to make sure they stick together. i really hope they develop this further (and i'm kinda sure they will, given the way they've handled riz's romantic orientation in seasons past) but already this is leagues above any aro rep i've ever seen?? like yeah, a really common fear for aro folks is that their friends will get into relationships and move on.

amatonormativity kind of demands that people prioritize romantic relationships, and also sets getting married as an actual step someone has to take to fully grow up. and, ofc, once people are married it's the expectation that they spend most of their time with their partner. and i've had aro friends who have said that this societal expectation is so upsetting and anxiety inducing, because it essentially means that eventually they'll be left behind by friends as they get married and move onto the next arbitrary developmental stage of life. and the fact that riz is already grappling with that fear makes him feel so fucking real. he's not just a guy who happens to be aro, his aromanticism affects his fears and priorities, etc.

which is so real!! being aro and/or ace absolutely separates you from some huge societal assumptions many people take for granted and it feels refreshing to see people approach an aro character with that understanding

#this is. absolute nonsense sorry it's 8 in the morning and i'm still so eepy gleepy sleepy #but i'm gonna be insane about this dnd show for a bit sorry to all who follow me :) #anyway this is all coming from a guy who probably isn't aro 😬👍 #(<- guy who is not as certain about that as they'd like to be tbh) #please enjoy my early morning caffeine brain musings #and also please please someone talk to me about fantasy high i am not being normal enough about it for a guy who doesn't have fh mutuals #figs sillies #fantasy high #fantasy high: junior year #riz gukgak

[blueblurseptember]

damn. can't stop thinking about binghe being shen yuan's comfort character in his previous life now. idk, but i am simply convinced that shen yuan has had the childhood of a typical asian middle child, made worse by the fact that he's from a rich family. all his little quirks and oddities would actually make a whole god awful lot of sense too if that were the case. like it would just makes sense.

ofc nobody else would be as good in watering down their feelings, devaluing their positive qualities, and underestimating their ability to make any real impact (on anyone they of value) than a second child who grew up often compared to the first and had been, intentionally or unintentionally, made to feel like they never have or never will measure up or measure enough.

i think it's also why of all the moments, he only genuinely started to understand binghe's true feelings when binghe began going off about feeling unwanted and never being enough to make anyone stay. all those feelings, those exact insecurities too, despite himself, he understood well enough bc he'd lived with them his entire life. even built half of his personality and put up most of the mental and emotional walls he have up to cope with them.

for so long, he'd seen binghe, post-abyss, as someone so unlike him. as far as he's concerned he's just some average guy who needs to learn how to settle with whatever life gives him bc he'll never be good enough to really, really achieve things. binghe, on the other hand, is an OP protagonist destined for greatness, to have everything and everyone he can ever want, to be chosen by anything or anyone he chooses.

they can't be any more different!!! except as it turns out, casting roles aside, binghe doesn't feel any differently about himself as shen yuan feels about his own self. and worse of all, and he's realized this too, that he's the last straw that got binghe feeling so strongly that way about himself.

anywaY, yes. binghe as shen yuan's comfort character—hoo boy, yes. he would soooo love a character like the original flavor binghe, alright. middle child who's constantly made to feel like he'll never be enough would totally love the living hell out of a white lotus who's constantly treated like a lesser being by the people around him only to emerge as a blackened OP protagonist who finally has achieved power not just over his life but the whole fucking world!!!

even before binghe turned real, he's helped shen yuan embrace, even just a little, his own feelings. they really are soul mates, idk, god.

#svsss #shen yuan #shen qingqiu #luo binghe #bingyuan #bingqiu #brain dump #sorry this got long #and is probably incoherent as hell but i am high on caffeine and in the middle of a brainrot

[notdelusionalatall]

i don't know if i am real i feel so disconnected from reality

#trauma #traumacore #traumacope #traumac0re #traumacore aesthetic #weird #weirdcore #weirdcore aesthetic #sanrio trauma #sanrio traumacore #my melody trauma #my melody traumacore #sanrio weirdcore #am i real #i don't know if i am real #derealization #dpdr #derealized #overcaffeinated #high on caffeine #liminality #liminal places #liminal aesthetic #liminal spaces #oddly familiar #oddly familiar places #my melody #morute #i am a brain in a vat #nothing is real

[normalayadraw]

FANCOMIC RELEASE ANNOUNCEMENT

So uh, I DID IT? MY FIRST EVER (FAN)COMIC RELEASE YEEEEEEEEEE

For those who heard me rambling about this fancomic, thx u for ur patience.

Now I shall offer u, the first ep of my OM! fancomic.

@seirindono @petiterazu this release is for u 2 to celebrate. Thx for being patient with me 😔💖

also the comic cover without the title version:

#normalayadraw #oc #obey me #obey me mc #obey me fanart #fancomic #webtoons #comic cover #also I speedrunning this cover under one day from sketch to rendering #Not reccommended #it's past 1 am rn and I'm high on caffeine #QvQ #Take care of ur health guys

[caffeine-high]

i've never really connected to a trans!headcanon before, in my life, but let me tell you, when the image of arthur cervero in a binder and heart boxers practicing guitar on his bed in the afternoon sunlight was sent to my brain, i connected so incredibly strongly that i had to stop watching the lecture i was watching and sketch it out

#ordem paranormal #arthur cervero #the only reason i didnt continue is bc i wanted to watch the next episode and i cant draw and watch at the same time #and the only reason im not drawing right now is bc i had to adult and cook + do my dishes (lets not think abt how its almost 23h now) #it is now on my WIP pile #but really high up like even above the actual ordem piece i was working on #and i am ceriously debating working on it rn but then i know i wont stop till its finished #and sleep is technically importnant.. #caffeines cackles

[ca-cupid]

so with the upcoming (official) release of g3 of monster high can we please not criticize people for using she/her for frankie

g1 and g2 frankie still uses she/her

people will most likely be referring to older frankie who was never nonbinary, this was just a headcanon

All the different gens have different canons to them so depending on what gen you are referring to frankie uses she and they pronouns

Some older fans who don’t keep up may not even know about frankie using they/them pronouns in g3

#hope this is coherent because dear lord I need some caffeine I’m dying #also want want to clarify that I am not talking about people who use she/her so that they don’t have to use they/them #I don’t want to hear any of that shit in the notes because I’m not defending that 👍 #monster high #monster high gen 3 #frankie stein

[detnuah]

ok this is for the two i think people who voted for doflamingo i’m going to do the rest of the poll options for shits another day good night

#i am you #my art #one piece #my sketches #2023 art #i think i’ve finally out worked my caffeine high now i can go to bed #the lettering is there because i wanted some space fillers

[thenocturnenarrator]

Me this morning: I’m really tired, I’ll drink some coffee to wake up

Me 30 mins later: I CAN SEE AT X2 SPEED THERE SRE SO MANY SOUNDS I FEAR NOTHING MY HEART BEATS AG THE SPEED OF LIIIIIIIIGHT I AM A GOD I CABT BE DEFEATED I CANT WONT AND HAVE NO INTENTION TO STOP MOVING I WANT TO STAND UP FOREVER I WANT TO SAY SOMETHING FUNNY BUT I HAVE NO THOUGHTS!

CAFFEINE YEEEEEEHAAAAAAW

#I am high on caffeine my dudessssssds #lgzlgxlgxlyx #I WANT TO BITE AN INNANIMATE OBJECT #I THINK ILL PAST OUT TODAY #IM FEELING KINDS DIZZY SOMETIMES #XLTDLTDLYX #YEEEEHAAAAAAWWW

[yourlocaldisneyvillain]

ppl who do mushrooms and weed bc they are "natural" (many things are Natural and doesn't mean they are good for you) will literally say shit like actually is has been PROVEN mushrooms are much less dangerous than alcohol!!!! alcohol is the DEVIL!!!!

gurl a glass of wine will never do to you what mushrooms can do to you. i've had a friend almost die bc she took "very safe" mushrooms that were legal and guaranteed by a certified shop owner that they were okay. she took a small, recommended amount. and she had a trip so bad she couldn't drink water bc she couldn't remember how and then she couldn't sober up, or eat chocolate which usually helps, etc. and she needed to be supervised bc she almost died. and other ppl in the group weren't doing so great either.

#personal #honestly there is this brand of ppl who are into drugs and yell that alcohol is the devil bc i guess they had an alcoholic relative #which sucks but also like #it's not the same my dude #you can be addicted to alcohol yes and a lot of ppl are #but you can also be addicted to weed :))) i know many people who are and if you are defending it so much you probably are too #if you smoke every day and rely on it for Anxiety #a glass of something strong never did to me what a joint did does lol #it is my personal choice not to do anything besides occasional drinking and i guess caffeine is a drug that i am very much addicted to #but you can't say that caffeine and weed are the same thing lol #ohhh i am angry #uwu ACTUALLY cocaine is much better for you than alcohol >:(((( #like come onnnnn #just smoke your joint and shut up #there doesn't have to be a Pure and Morally Correct reason for you wanting to get high #i know that there have been like studies that are like oh it's different for weed in terms of physical addiction but like. #1. ppl who are VERY into weed usually don't JUST do weed they do other drugs #2. you can be psychologically addicted to it like oh i cannot do without my weed even if you won't have severe physical withdrawal symptoms

[outer-edges]

ugh i forgot how much better writing papers makes me feel. like i always am like killing myself on the road to writing a paper, but once i actually engage with the academics my brain is like "YES!!! FINALLY!!! SOME GOOD FUCKING FOOD" and i get so giddy whenever i get on a roll. its srsly like ripping a line.

#i also feel this way doing calc #i miss my calc class in high school SO BAD #DERIVATIVES AND INTEGRALS I MISS UUUU #i shat out a six page research paper today and i am literally feeling so much better mentally #before i wrote this paper i could barely peel myself up off the floor 💀 #and it COULD be the monsters talking but also i am currently in the crash phase of caffeine consumption so im going to assume no

[troblsomtwins829]

Another StrayCat update:

Just finished the first third of chapter two, and made it a little farther on others. I now have....FOUR! Partial chapters. I also had to make an "Intelligence Chart" which is basically a list of all the information each character has available to them at any point in the story, colour coded to WHEN they learn that information.

It's a new thing I'm trying. I thought it would help.

Have another snippet!

The small dust vent he came through before was still open, had been for days, so chances were pretty good this was a dead section of the Fortress. Then again, it was pretty high off the ground. No one would really look up there. And if any of the safety audits Daxter’s perused were any indicator, this place shoulda been shut down years ago for all the health violations alone.

Seriously, how did a place this big not have a single up-to-date and working fire extinguisher?

More soon!

#jak and daxter #jnd #straycat au #stray cat au #stray cat jak #fanfic snippet #writing update #I don't know how to write spy shenanigans!! bite me!!! #the fortress is not osha compliant #you can't change my mind #why yes officer i AM still high on caffeine #how did you guess?

[july-19th-club]

the thing about drugs is that while i have a genetic history of fairly addictive tendencies and therefore it probably wouldnt be a good idea to get into anything too dangerous anyway, i know i myself am not likely to ever really have to worry about the temptation simply bc im too embarrassed to get high. like i dont want to meet that person and almost certainly nobody else does either. so i just dont do drugs not because they're drugs, i dont think drugs, conceptually, practically, are embarrassing or, like, ontologically morally wrong or whatever. i think they're fine and more power to those who can enjoy them, hopefully safely. but i personally cannot get high just bc i couldn't stand for anybody to see me acting silly

#personal self-control is very important to me its a whole thing #largely because when im sober i dont exactly have it so its like. why would i on purpose make it worse . for a good time? #i CANT have a good time. what if im too uninhibited????? incroyable. or whatever #so i drink but never enough to be sillydrunk and i dont get high because i dont want to be observed by others while high #ridiculous #q #like in college my friend group was largely composed of stoners etc as one would expect in an arts program #i have known ppl who have a healthy relationship to the drugs they do consume #i have known ppl who have had an unhealthy one and had to stop for their well-being #but i have simply never started bc with the exclusion of occasional alcohol and like. periodically caffeine. unless im in a decaf phase #i simply am too nervous to even contemplate the chemicals #thats also why it took me twenty-eight years to get on an ssri but whatever

[darkwood-sleddog]

been trying to fully detox from using caffeine and i gotta say. i feel a lot better.

#not dogs #i mean its not good for me to have anyways with my high blood pressure but... #i got an air up waterbottle and it's been incredible honestly #i hate feeling sluggish in the morning due to lack of caffeine or dependency on caffeine to wake up #it'll make early am runs with the dogs a lot easier if i'm just....better about going to bed on time #ah. being in your 30s be like..

[enchantedlandcoffee]

HANG ON

THE WAY LOUIS TOOK THE SELFIE IN THE MIRROR REMINDS ME SO MUCH OF HOW HARRY DID IT

#i am slightly on a caffeine high so just ignore me