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#he's got kind of a 'all cops are bastards including me now can i PLEASE retire now' type vibe
spiral-wizard · 2 months
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Recently started watching a show called Pie in the Sky on PBS with the fiance, played first episode on a whim while at a loss for what to watch and now we're HOOKED
The tumblr girlies need to get on this one, Henry Crabbe is very #babygirl
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genderkoolaid · 2 years
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experiences w transandrophobia, cw for rape, abuse (mental & physical), also brief touches on me being suicidal and being anorexic & just general horrible fuckery:
i feel like some of these are also just transphobia but reading the other submissions made me think about them. so i thought maybe i'd share. you can just delete this though if it doesn't fit w the theme, dw <3 anyways, when i was younger, i was subjected to csa, from about 4-8 years old. which isn't that bad but years later i learnt it was because i was presenting as very masc from about two years old and he felt he could get away with it because my mother thought i was tainted and horrible and demonic for presenting masculinely. and he was right, he got away with it without my mother intervening until he died. thanks to him i have DID. in my first relationship, i dated a cis man where he abused me for 3 years, treating me as a woman, and misgendering me unless we were with people and if we were he would show me off like some kind of sex object to people. i never said anything because i loved him and he technically never deadnamed me (used a demeaning nickname) and i hated making him mad (bc he beat the shit out of me, i am so stupid /lh). he subjected me to corrective rape time after time after time. when he left me, he outed me to my mother. she tried to kill me with a knife. the police didn't come when i called them (fuck the pigs, all cops are bastards). now my mother shows me off like my ex used to. it triggers me so bad. she tells people how proud she is of her son and how she's always supported my masculinity, and how good of a mother she is. i only very recently learned i am intersex, through old medical documents, and i highly suspect this is why she hated me as a child and told me i was a demon so often. but i can't mention it because shes probably gonna stab me if i do. and i keep trying to kill myself, but she wont take me to hospital because i do it to myself and she's trying "to put me off" doing it. she uses my DID and bipolar to discourage me from transitioning, to the point if i thought of transitioning i had panic attacks. i have to hide my binders in case she steals them, she often has volatile breakdowns where she uses my dysphoria and anorexia to try and suicide bait me. she withholds food from the whole family (including 3 under-teens kids) if she looks through my food and weight records and sees anything has gone up. i genuinely think one day i will die in this house, alone, and that terrifies me. but there's nothing i can do. i'm slowly dying and i will die here and nobody will care.
anyways i had about 47 panic attacks typing this up, so i hope you have a wonderful day, take care, i love your blog i hope you're healthy and well <333
Thank you for sharing your experiences.
And if you ever need a donations/mutual aid post shared, or if you need to vent or anything, please do not be afraid to reach out. I hope for the best for you and your siblings, and I hope you will be able to leave and have the life you deserve.
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sierraraeck · 3 years
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Control
JJ x John B
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Summary: JJ likes losing control, and there is no one safer he can do that with than his boyfriend, John B. But after a particularly awful week, JJ just needs something he can be in control of.
Category: Smut, angst
Warnings: Cussing/slurs, JJ’s home life so abuse and violence, allusion to sexual abuse, rough sex, choking, safe word used. Look, this gets dark, so this is your warning.
Word Count: 3.4K
A/N: I agree with a lot of other people that in their relationship, John B is usually the dominant one because JJ likes losing control, but I’m convinced that after a really fucking bad week, he just loses it and needs something he can control. This is what I imagine that would look like.
•••
It had been a bad week. It felt never ending, getting roughed up by the Kooks, running from the cops, taking the fall for Pope, and now this.
If you keep going down this road, you’re going to end up just like your dad.
Maybe his best friend, and within the last year or so his boyfriend, was right. Maybe he, and everyone else on the island who constantly reminded him of his blood, was right. Maybe he was destined to be a complete fuck up with no future other than three cement walls and a grid of bars. Not like JJ’d ever imagined his life going any differently.
We’re sick of your shit.
Those were the words echoing in his head as his feet made the decision before his mind did.
You are a worthless piece of shit.
He remembered something Pope had told him once, that the brain can’t differentiate between the truth and something that has been repeated to you over and over.
You’ll be back here one day. You good for nothing piece of shit, that’s why your mamma left. Stay down, boy. I don’t care where you’ve been. Really living up to your name, Maybank. You’re just like your daddy. Fucking bastard. Worthless.
Must be true, right? If everyone is saying it, including the only people he’s ever really thought cared about him, it must be true.
As he opened the door to the run down shack, he already knew what he’d see, but a shutter of fear still raced down his spine. His dad was sitting on the couch, all kinds of beer and pill bottles scattered around him.
“What the hell you doing back here, boy?” the gruff voice of JJ’s nightmares asked.
“Dad, I-”
“The least your worthless ass could do is get me a beer.”
JJ complied, because, what else was he going to do? Weak.
As he walked over to his dad, the smell of beer was overwhelming. It always was, but the smell seemed stronger than he remembered. His dad's tolerance must be higher than it was a few weeks ago.
“Open it,” Luke demanded.
JJ tried, he really did, but his hands were shaking too damn much. Come on, don’t be such a pussy.
Apparently he couldn’t do it fast enough, so Luke ripped the bottle out of his hands, causing it to shatter on the floor. JJ flinched at the sound.
“What are you, retarded? Can’t even open one goddamned bottle!”
JJ didn’t even try to duck. He felt Luke’s knuckle make contact with his cheekbone, head whipping to the side. We’re sick of your shit, JJ.
“Dad-”
“Don’t fucking beg you weak, worthless piece of shit!”
Flames enveloped his gut, followed by another fire lit over his ribs. We don’t want you around.
The voice he was hearing sounded an awful lot like John B’s.
“Fucking pathetic! Just like your mother!” JJ was on the floor now, not completely able to remember how he got there. As his body screamed in pain with each new kick, his mind was getting farther and farther away from where he was.
Our lives would be better without you in it. I would be so much happier if I had a boyfriend who wasn’t such a burden, such a fuck up. Someone without so many fucking issues.
He could feel the blood dripping down his face and leg, but refused to make himself consciously aware of it.
This is what you deserve, JJ.
This is what you deserve.
•••
Twenty-eight hours. That’s how long it’d been since John B last saw JJ. The moment he walked out the door John B kicked himself for it.
He couldn’t believe he’d actually said that to JJ. ‘You’re going to end up just like your dad.’ He couldn’t think of a worse thing to say to JJ.
It’d overall been a shit week, and John B knew that he was sleep deprived and irritable from everything that’d gone on, not like that was any excuse for what he’d done.
As time ticked by, John B just kept going over everything he’d done wrong in the past week.
You’re going to end up just like your dad. We’re sick of your shit.
Not to mention the time he grabbed JJ by the collar of his shirt and shoved him up against the wall. The way JJ flinched and seemed to shrink into himself, immediately casting his eyes down, was an image John B couldn’t get out of his head. He knew better than to touch JJ without explicitly asking or giving him plenty of forewarning, let alone grab him out of nowhere while he was angry.
God, JJ looked so scared in that moment, and John B couldn’t even believe he’d just made the person he cared about most in the world feel threatened by him. And JJ didn’t even look like he’d fight back. He looked like he was bracing himself, ready to take whatever harm was to come to him.
JJ put so much trust in John B, letting him be in control of their most intimate time together. JJ once told him that he felt the most safe when he was around John B, and he heard all of the words not said in that one sentence. I trust you. I trust you to have power over me, emotionally and physically. I trust you enough to be vulnerable, knowing that I won’t get hurt. Knowing that you won’t hurt me.
And John B felt like within the span of a week, he’d destroyed all of that.
Just come home, just come home, just come home. Please, JJ, just come back to me.
The sun was starting to set, and John B was getting even more antsy. They’d never had a fight that kept JJ away for longer than a day or so, which meant that John B already knew where JJ was, even though he didn’t want to believe it.
Shit, shit, shit…
John B headed toward the door of the chateau, flinging it open on a mission to save JJ when he looked up.
Oh thank god.
JJ was standing on his porch, hand clutching his side and a couple butterfly bandages over his eyebrow and cheek. His shirt was torn, displaying the three developing bruises John B could see, meaning there were probably at least twice as many he couldn’t see.
John B’s mouth was hanging open, stopped dead in his tracks, unable to find the words to tell JJ how sorry he was and how much he wished he could’ve been better and how-
But his train of thought was cut off when JJ took two big strides towards him, smashing their lips together like it was the only thing keeping him alive. His hands were gripping onto John B’s sides, wadding up the cloth in his fists, and moved the pair of them back into the chateau, kicking the door shut with his foot.
JJ backed John B into the nearest wall, the intensity of the kiss momentarily distracting John B from the bigger situation at hand. JJ tugged John B’s shirt up, helping him out of it.
As they parted to remove the garment, John B tried to get JJ’s attention. “JJ-”
He didn’t let him get any more words out, though, pressing their lips back together the moment he could.
John B knew that JJ had a lot of pent up anger toward his father, toward the kooks, toward the world. He knew that JJ put on a show of being powerful, untouchable, even. JJ wanted others to think he was always in complete control, and while unhinged at times, a force to be reckoned with. JJ wanted others to think he was strong, and John B knew that was because of how frequently he was told he was weak.
John B thought JJ was as tough as they came. He was sure that if anyone else had been dealt the hand JJ had, they’d be doing a hell of a lot worse, and was impressed by his boyfriend on the daily.
But John B always thought JJ was the strongest when he was the most vulnerable, when he was with him, making this new dominant side of JJ concerning. JJ liked losing control and letting his guard down when he was with John B, letting John B take the lead. Right now, though, JJ was putting his walls back up, the tough act coming out. That’s how John B knew shit had really gotten bad, and he couldn’t help but blame himself for it.
John B tried again, “JJ.” He got the same reaction he did the first time, a non answer. John B delicately placed his hands on JJ’s shoulders, creating just a few inches of space between them as he finally got his attention. “JJ, JJ, slow down. I’ve been worried about you. What is going on, what hap-”
“John B,” JJ cut him off with a low, abnormally calm voice. John B stared in silence, growing even more concerned and confused by the look of intensity in his eyes. “Shut up.”
John B knew that at the end of the day, he’d do whatever JJ asked of him, but it didn’t stop him from trying to get more information. “JJ, I just-”
“Please,” JJ almost pleaded, gazing deep into his eyes. “Give me tonight.” John B stared at his boyfriend for a few more seconds before nodding his head. “Tell me if things get too-”
“I know,” John B assured, remembering the safe word they’d established early on in their relationship, South, and the one time JJ had to use it. He’d had a panic attack, mumbling something about a flashback, but John B had never gotten anything more than that.
With the green light, JJ slipped his tongue back into John B’s mouth, cool rings on his hand pressing into his neck, using his body to push John B back against the wall.
JJ was running his hands all over John B’s exposed chest, John B slowly moving his hands up to place on JJ’s waist. The moment he made the slightest contact though, JJ flinched away, grabbing both of his wrists and pinning them to the wall.
His grip was unfaltering, and stronger than usual, and JJ held his wrists there as he started kissing down John B’s body, pausing to suck and graze his teeth over a few spots.
Reaching the waistband of John B’s shorts, JJ moved his grip from John B’s wrists in order to yank his shorts and underwear down. John B’s hands started to tingle, unaware until just then that JJ had been gripping so tight it started cutting off blood flow.
JJ, now on his knees, started pumping his hand slowly up and down John B’s half-hard shaft, the contact sending a shiver down his spine.
At one point, John B couldn’t stop the small jerk of his hips toward JJ, which was the wrong thing to do, as JJ’s crushing grip was back, both hands holding onto his hips and slamming them back into the wall. JJ resorted to using his mouth instead, lips wrapping around the tip and hollowing his cheeks. John B tossed his head back, harder than he intended, making a somewhat painful contact with the wall. JJ started bobbing his head up and down at a faster pace, only breaking contact once to wet two of his fingers which he circled around John B’s hole.
John B could see the contractions of JJ’s biceps, and almost felt his fingers shaking against him. He was confused at first about what it meant, but soon figured out that he was holding back. JJ had always been the dominant one in his flings with girls, but had never been in this position with John B before. He could tell that JJ wasn’t going as far as he wanted to, that he was restraining himself from taking what he wanted.
John B wanted to know everything that JJ had to give, and acknowledged, in almost a challenge-like way, “You’re holding back on me.”
Within a flash, JJ stood up, threading his fingers through John B’s hair to yank his head back, his other hand keeping it’s harsh grip on his hip. John B whimpered at the sensations.
Looking down on him, JJ demanded, “Is that not what you want?”
John B thought it wasn’t, but seeing him now, and knowing how much darkness he has, there was a fraction of a second where he wanted to change his mind. But the second passed and John B still wanted to see all of JJ, every dark and twisted corner, everything he hadn’t seen before. And he could tell that it was taking a lot of effort for JJ to restrain himself, too much effort. John B wanted him to let go.
He shook his head, voice coming out as only a small whisper, “It’s not what you want either.”
It was like flipping a switch. With force, JJ dragged him by his hair to the bedroom, and once inside, threw John B onto the mattress.
It felt a little unfair, John B completely exposed in front of JJ while he still had his shorts and shirt on. It was getting dark now, the sun having completely set over the water, leaving only the light of twilight to illuminate JJ’s face as he climbed over John B.
He quickly coated his fingers with the lube from the bedside table before shoving them into John B. With his other hand, JJ was tugging his own shorts down and reached for a condom. He had to remove his fingers from John B to put it on, causing John B to squirm in his absence.
Without any forewarning, and barely any time to adjust, JJ was pushing into John B, drawing a small whine from his kiss-swollen lips.
JJ set a bruising pace, leaving John B gasping for air. “JJ-” he choked out.
“Is this what you wanted?” JJ hissed, hand snaking up to wrap around John B’s throat. “You wanted to see just how fucked up I am?”
JJ’s grip was getting tighter, his pace faster, as he kept talking. “Well, Maybanks are only good for one thing, so you’re right. I will end up just like him some day. I already am like him. A fucked up monster.”
“J, no, that’s not-” John B started to say, as he reached a hand up to grab JJ’s wrist in an attempt to loosen his grip.
“Don’t touch me!” JJ yelled. John B removed his hand like he’d been burned. “Don’t you get it? I ruin everything I touch!”
John B’s face was starting to flush, his head getting fuzzy. He could only concentrate on the cool rings digging into his neck and the words JJ was saying, sounding farther and farther away.
“Have you ever experienced death before?” JJ whispered like a threat next to his ear. “Because I have. I can show you.”
“Jayj-” John B pleaded, using his last reserve of breath. “S..so-south.”
And just like that, JJ was off him, backing himself against a wall as far away from John B as possible. John B took a deep, shuddering breath and swallowed, closing his eyes until the fuzziness in his head subsided.
When he felt like he could think again, he sat up and looked around the room for JJ. He was crouched in a dark corner of the room, head in his hands, knees trying to block his face.
“JJ,” John B said with a scruffy voice, standing up to walk over to his boyfriend. He slid down the wall until he was seated next to JJ, sure to leave enough room for him to move without touching him. JJ curled into himself even more, leaning away from John B. “JJ, please look at me.”
JJ did as he asked, alluring blue eyes shimmering with tears, a dramatic difference from the dark, intense orbs of only a few seconds before.
“I’m okay,” John B assured.
JJ shook his head, eyes roaming over his hands, and hiccupped, “I hurt you.”
“You didn’t, I promise. I’m okay, I’m right here,” John B told him.
JJ’s eyes were panicked as he scanned over John B’s body. John B followed his gaze, evaluating the already forming marks on his hips and wrists. He was sure that JJ’d left a handprint on his neck, too, which was where JJ’s gaze lingered the longest. “No. I hurt you. I need to leave.”
JJ stood up, making a noise of discomfort as he did so, and hurried toward the door. John B was behind him in an instant and put his hand on the door. JJ stopped in his tracks, taking a step back from John B and looked back at the ground.
JJ was shutting down, John B knew that, and he knew that he had to reach him fast before he went completely under. “JJ,” John B whispered, “Can I… Can I touch you?”
JJ didn’t answer, but he didn’t back away or say no. John B slowly raised his arm, hovering his hand before JJ. “Is this going to be okay?”
JJ nodded, and before John B could fully process it, JJ was throwing himself into his arms, clinging to him like he never had before. He started sobbing, forehead pressed against his chest, and John B couldn’t hold back the tears that slipped down his own cheeks.
��How can anyone ever trust me if I can’t even be trusted around you?” JJ choked out. John B wasn’t sure if he’d heard him right, because he was speaking so quietly, but he thought he heard him ask ‘how can I trust myself?’
John B walked the two of them backwards toward the bed, sitting down as gently as possible. He attempted to pull away from JJ, but JJ held onto him. Tilting JJ’s head up, he pressed a kiss to his forehead, then promised, “I’ll be right back.”
John B walked over to put on a new pair of boxers before grabbing the first aid kit, and returned to where JJ was on the corner of the mattress. He lifted JJ’s shirt over his head, tossing it aside.
It hadn’t been this bad in a while. There were four purple, fist-sized bruises littering JJ’s torso, a yellowish one on the back of one of his shoulder blades, and a cut along the top of JJ’s shoulder down his tricep, not to mention the cuts he’d already bandaged himself over his eyebrow and cheek. John B coaxed JJ out of his shorts, which displayed something even worse.
There was a giant stack of gauze covered by a poor wrap job below JJ’s hip, reaching down the side of his thigh. “J… what… what happened?”
“He uh… he um… uh,” JJ trailed off, swiping at his nose. John B stayed silent, giving JJ time to put the words together in his head. “He called me… he said I was a dirty fag and that anyone who wanted to be with me was lying and using me because who would ever actually want to be around me? And then he made me…” JJ shuddered out a sigh and shook his head. “And then he tore his beer can in half and jammed it into my leg.”
“And you tried to bandage this up by yourself?” John B asked, concern dripping from every word. They both heard the real question, ‘You didn’t come to me?’
JJ shrugged. “I don’t know, I thought… I thought you might be getting tired of having to deal with this.” Having to deal with me.
“I will never get tired of being around you,” John B guaranteed. To emphasize his point, John B placed a kiss on JJ’s lips, then both his cheeks, his closed eyelids, down his neck. “I love you, JJ. There will never be a moment when that is not true.” Kissing across JJ’s cut shoulder and down his shoulder blade, John B felt him start to relax. He brushed his lips as delicately as he could over the bruises he found there, then traveled down his torso to do the same. “I love every inch of you. Every corner of your mind.”
“That’s the cheesiest shit I’ve ever heard,” JJ said with a small laugh.
John B smiled, looking up at JJ through his eyelashes. “I know. Doesn’t mean it’s not true.”
JJ brought John B up to kiss him, a finger under his chin, pulling him as close as he could.
When they parted, JJ whispered, “I love you too.”
They stayed sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at each other with small smiles for a while before John B said, “Let’s get you patched up.”
•••
Thanks for reading. Let me know what you thought, feedback is appreciated. :)
Find me on AO3 at the same username.
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talatomaz · 3 years
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chased away by shadows | hailey upton x fem!reader
a/n: i didn’t include a love confession but i did reference it. after 8x11, we saw how hailey reacts to those words and honestly, i get it bc i’m kinda the same so i just changed it up a bit.
not a huge fan of this and there’s not as much hailey x r as i initially wanted but oh well, hope you still like it anon
(feedback/positive comments are appreciated)
requested by anon: “hi! can i please request a hailey upton x intelligence love interest reader please? it’s been a really rough case and reader is quite depressed and hailey comes over and reader ends up falling asleep safe and warm in hailey’s arms and in the morning there is a love confession maybe? hope that makes sense, thank you x ”
warnings: mentions of assault, death, murder. usual canon violence
word count: 1.6k
masterlist | navigation | request rules
i do not give you permission to repost or translate my fics on any platform - likes/reblogs are okay and are much appreciated
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“Upton and I will take the front. Burgess, Atwater, secure the back.”
You ordered, whispering into your comms.
It had been a rough couple of days.
The Intelligence Unit had caught a rape and murder case with seemingly no witnesses or leads to the sick bastard who’d done this.
Like the rest of your team, you were damn near losing the end of your rag at the lack of leads and it didn’t help that this brought up some unwanted memories from your past.
You shrugged them off, not wanting to get emotional at work but it was difficult. Especially when you had no idea who you were looking for.
But you’d managed to catch a break as one of your CIs had contacted you, telling you that they had heard about some gang member who’d been boasting about “having fun with a chick before popping her off”.
After some further investigation, you’d managed to identify the man. He had a rap sheet about as long as your arm, including prior battery and assault charges.
It was only when Halstead had found out that he was holed up in a supposedly vacant property that you’d all geared up, armed to the nines because you knew the kind of heat this gang carried.
“On my mark.” Halstead said into your comms.
He waited a few moments for you all to get into position. You were standing behind Hailey, your hand on her arm, alert and ready to conduct your search.
“Be careful.”
“You too.” You replied softy to your girlfriend.
You’d been dating for the past 6 months, having fallen into bed one night after a evening out at Molly’s. You’d both agreed to keep it a secret as it was a one-time thing but what you both didn’t realise at the time was just how much you liked one another.
It had soon become a habit. The two of you sleeping together after everyone gathered for a social call at Molly’s until one evening, Hailey told you that she liked you and wanted the two of you to be more than just sex.
You were surprised to say the least because there was never any indication that she liked you. In fact, you thought she was out of your league considering how beautiful and smart she was. But you decided to take the leap and you were so glad you did because you loved being with her.
Not that you’d told her those words yet, mind you.
It was a tough thing to say, for you anyway, especially after your past alongside the lack of any emotional attachments with your parents. And you knew Hailey had her fair share of trauma too, the majority of which you learned after you and Ruzek overheard her telling a suspect they had in interrogation.
And although your relationship wasn’t without its flaws, it had pretty much been smooth sailing since the moment you’d got together. No unnecessary drama or bullshit.
That was the last thing the both of you needed in this type of job.
“Now.” Halstead ordered so you gave a quick nod to the blonde before yelling “Chicago PD!” as Hailey kicked the door down.
There were a few offenders in the house who tried to run when you’d entered and as Hailey and the rest of the team went to secure them, you made your way up the stairs to see if there was anyone else hiding out.
Your arm was extended, gun clutched carefully in your hand, finger just next to the trigger, ready for any indication of movement. Reaching the landing at the top of the stairs, you entered one of the bedrooms. As you stepped through the door, someone jumped out and hit you in the head with a bottle. It shattered upon contact with your skull and the force threw you as you groaned in pain.
You began fighting the male, who weighed at least 100 pounds more than you, so it was no small feat. You wrestled with the gun he’d aimed at you before kicking him in between his legs and throat punching him.
As he coughed to catch his breath, you grabbed your gun that had fallen out of your hands and aimed it at the man crumbled on the floor. Ignoring the way blood seeped from your wound and down your face, you yelled, “Chicago PD. Stay down or I will drop you.”
Staring down at him, you realised that it was the man you’d been looking for and when he looked up at you with a sinister smirk on his face, you wanted nothing more than to shoot him where he lay.
But you had more self control than that so, instead, you kept your gun trained on him and called downstairs for back-up.
In less than a minute, Hailey and Jay were right beside you. Jay handcuffed the suspect and you re holstered your gun.
“Baby, are you okay?” Hailey asked frantically, her hand gently cupping your face as she examined the cut on your forehead.
“Yeah, I’m okay.” You said, releasing the breath you didn’t realise you’d been holding.
“Are you sure? You’re bleeding pretty badly.”
You winced when Hailey touched the wound.
“Shit, sorry.”
“It’s fine. Come on, let’s go.”
                ✧── ・ 。゚★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧
After apprehending the suspect, Hailey had forced you to be checked out by one of the paramedics who’d arrived to take care of one of the offenders that Kevin had shot. They’d cleaned and stitched the wound and told you to take some paracetamol for the pain.
Now you were currently watching Voight and Halstead take lead on interrogating the man who’d attacked you at the house.
The man was so vile that you had to force yourself to not jump through the two-way glass and smack him silly. He’d copped to the murder but wouldn’t admit to the rape, sitting there with a smirk on his face.
“She wanted it rough. She was a slut. I just gave her what she wanted.”
The words continued to ring in your ear as they were words that you, yourself, had once been told. Forcing the bile back down your throat, you watched as Voight moved to stand behind the man, his hands on his shoulders.
“I’d watch your mouth if I were you.” Voight said, the threat lingering behind his words.
Your hands clenched into fists as he continued to speak.
“I ain’t gonna apologise for banging that whore. She got what she wanted.”
You could feel your anger boiling until it threatened to consume you so you left the viewing room and briskly walked to your desk.
You grabbed your coat that was hung on the back of your chair and ran out of the precinct; ignoring how your girlfriend’s eyes bore in your body as you hurried out of the building.
She decided to let you go, knowing that you needed space for a few hours.
                ✧── ・ 。゚★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧
When you got back to your apartment, you fell down onto your couch, picked up one of the throw pillows and screamed into it, your frustrations coming to a blow.
You went from screaming to crying out of anger and old pain until you felt a hand on your shoulder that startled you. You hadn’t even realised Hailey had used her key to enter your apartment.
“Oh, baby.” Hailey murmured when she saw how red your eyes were.
She placed a soft kiss on your cheek and went to your freezer to grab an ice pack. She wrapped it in a table cloth and gently rested it over your eyes, the coolness soothing your swollen eyes immediately.
You tried to take the ice pack away from her but she simply tsked at you; too tired to fight, you instead relished in her taking care of you.
“Sorry.” You mumbled, finally gathering the courage to speak.
“It’s been a rough couple of days, honey. No one blames you for your reaction.”
“That’s not why I’m so...so angry and why I’m like this.” Your voice barely louder than a whisper but Hailey still heard you.
“What do you mean?” The blonde asked, furrowing her brows in concern. But her eyes told you that she already knew what you meant and that made your heart hurt.
“I just-I. It was a long time ago, back in high school. I’m over it but cases like these just bring it all back up, you know?” You sighed, deciding to remain ambiguous whilst knowing full well she knew exactly what you were referring to.
“Oh, baby,” Hailey repeated as she wrapped her free arm around you and pulled you close.
“The guy ended up confessing not long after you left. Voight stuck him in the cage and he ended up having a change of heart.” Hailey told you as she placed soft kisses on your forehead.
Your derived snort was muffled as your head was buried in Hailey’s chest but she heard you and chuckled in response.
“You’re safe now, y/n. You’re safe with me.” Hailey whispered, breaking the peaceful silence that had filled the room.
Her words brought a sense of calm to you as you sighed contently in her arms.
Gently removing the ice pack from your eyes, she put it on the table before lifting your chin up with her finger, bringing you in for a deep, reassuring kiss.
“I-I’m glad you’re in my life, Hailey” You said, catching yourself before you said those three words. You weren’t ready to say them aloud just yet and you had a feeling that your girlfriend felt the same way.
The blonde smiled knowingly, kissing your lips once more before hugging you close to her as you both got comfortable on the large couch you were still on.
“I’m glad to have you in my life too.”
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kinktae · 4 years
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beyond the story: bitchin’
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Hi friends! I hope you are all staying safe and healthy during these tough times! I really wanted to put something out there as a thank you to just how much support Bitchin’ got. You guys really are incredible. So, although this story has come to an end, I wanted to properly close the Bitchin’ chapter by giving you all a behind the scenes look at Bitchin’ and everything that went into writing it. This includes hidden easter eggs, backstories, alternative plot-lines, and a short drabble of the Bitchin’ cast 10 years after the story’s end.
Without further ado, please enjoy and thank you again for all your love. You have all of mine.
CHAPTER ONE – PARTNERS
Ah, yes, the start of this whole wild ride. I’ve always loved the whole nerd/popular person trope in fanfics, so it was only a matter of time before I tried my hand at it too. One thing I was adamant about was not making this a “popular person turns nerd hot/confident/better” fic as its kind of one of my least favorite cliches. With that in mind, and knowing that I was going to allude to TATBILB’s contract, I decided that I wanted Y/N to gain as much from the deal as Jungkook did. No blackmail, no just agreeing for the hell of it – Y/N was going to further herself and her dreams given the opportunity.
The beginning of the chapter is where the two are most separated and dissimilar throughout the whole story. It wasn’t that they were fundamentally different, it was that they approached life differently. Y/N was frustrated at how superficial Jungkook seemed, because she believes there is much more to life than just kicking your feet up and cracking jokes.
On the other hand, Jungkook didn’t understand why Y/N was so tense and on guard. To him, life was meant to enjoy and not take so seriously. Which makes sense, given that he grew up with minimal rules and minimal worries (bare minimum partners wassup !) 
“So, do we have a deal? Partners?” There was mischievous timber to his words, the kind that made you feel as if this would all later come back to bite you in the ass.
Pushing that pestering thought away, you took his hand into yours, holding his eyes as you gave it a firm shake.
“Partners.”
God, this bit. I knew from the minute I wrote it that I was writing the ending of bitchin’ along with it. I knew this was exactly how I was going to end this story, bc the word partners has multiple means right? In chapter 1, this meant business partners, but in the final chapter… it means life partners. Idk, I’m just still really happy with this writing decision :D
CHAPTER TWO – THE CONTRACT
Dearest Yara. We meet her in chapter two don’t we? Yara is completely based off of my irl best friend Yara who is a writer and who helped me A LOT with this story. She was my biggest supporter throughout figuring out this crazy plot. It was initially only about seven parts, but with her help I managed to bump it up to 10! Everybody say thank you Yaraaaa.
You were angry, that much was evident to her. Yara was sat in your shared dorm’s living room, a thick blanket engulfing her small frame. You briefly glanced towards the TV, it was tuned into MTV, the familiar music video of Every Breath You Take by The Police playing, before directing your glare back onto the copper-haired girl.
The song reference is a direct allusion to writer Yara’s fic, which is one of my favorite fics by her. She was actively writing it around the start of our friendship so it only felt right to pay respects to her. The introduction of her character felt necessary imo bc I wanted to make sure Y/N had a life outside Jungkook. Plus, I got to use the scenes between the two girls as a way to reference the music and culture scene. Yara is especially a fan of the powerful women in the music industry at the time, i.e., Madonna, Annie Lennox, Cyndi Laupner, etc.) Yara is a raging feminist and believer in sexual freedom and libery for women, we do in fact have to stan.
“How old do you think your sister is?”
“Hey, don’t sass me. For your information, Lyanna still has all her Care Bear tapes. She threw a hissy fit when my mom tried to give them away last Christmas.” Yara recalled.
Lyanna is one of writer Yara’s past pseudonyms. She always used to joke about how whenever she read it, it was confusing because there was Y/N, Yara and Lyanna, which were technically all her lolol.
FUNNY STORY ABOUT THE CONTRACT I INSERTED INTO THIS PICTURE… Twitter found it and made it into somewhat of a meme because no one knew it came from a fic rip. I was actually rly embarrassed and even wrote some posts about how much twitter scared me on my blog LMAO. but THEN weirdly enough, I actually stumbled upon a small community on twitter who actually found my fic and would TWEET ABOUT IT!!! LIKE REACTIONS TO EACH UPDATE!!! I wish I could go back in time and remember how giddy I was the first time I found a tweet about my fic. The fanfic community on twitter gave me a new love for the site (which I had previously had removed myself from because of its toxicity) and I have met so many wonderful people because of it. People even made themselves a little twitter group chat to talk about my fics, and now we are all friends! I miss posting a chapter of bitchin’ and refreshing my twitter feed as all my mutuals would post memes and live tweet their reactions. God that made me so fucking happy.
CHAPTER THREE – THE ROLLERSKATING DATE
I love the bickering in this chapter, because unlike the bickering in the first chapter, it’s actually less hostile and more playful. Y/N is slowly letting her guard down to the very persistently charming Jungkook.
“Woah. Family of six, huh? So you have siblings then.” He noted.
“Yep. Three.”
“Tell me about them.”
Looking up from where you were slipping on your second skate, you met Jungkook’s eyes, surprised to see genuine interest in them.
I actually originally had Y/N brush him off here. I was going to wait until the drunk party scene for Y/N to open up about her family and relationship with her sisters. But then I kind of thought to myself… Why? Y/N made peace with it and doesn’t hold onto those insecurities anymore. And objectively, Jungkook hasn’t proven himself to be a bad person so… I let Y/N open herself up to him.
“Then there’s the twins, Rosa and Lia.”
“Hold on. Twins? Wait… did they go to our high school?” Jungkook asked, his interest in this conversation doubled.
“Yep. They were two grades above us.” You confirmed.
“Oh shit, yeah, I remember your sisters, they were mad hot.” Jungkook let out a low whistle, before stiffening, flashing you an apologetic look. “Uh, in a totally non-meathead way.”
You offered the scared-looking boy a small smile, shaking your head.
Some of y’all notice but, Rosa and Lia are a blatant homage to my name: Roselia. ACTUALLY some form of my name can be found in every one of the rewind series fics, including upcoming ones. I’ll give a cookie to whoever can find every single mention hehe.
“I told you it was dumb.” You laughed nervously.
It wasn’t that you cared much about what Jungkook thought but you had a feeling a guy like him, who was popular and carefree, wouldn’t be able to sympathize in the way you would like him to.
“No, I’m just… surprised, that’s all.”
Jungkook certainly was surprised. You had built up quite the impression on him from the very moment you two met. It was hard to imagine that the girl who was so unapologetically herself was ever unsure or insecure.
Somehow, the idea tugged at his heart, as if he understood you more if only just a little.
From the get go, Jungkook was extremely drawn to just how confident and secure Y/N was in herself. I knew I wanted Y/N to be unapologetically sure of herself and in her abilities. Something I didn’t want, however, was for frat boy!jungkook’s only personality traits to be liking sex and being a cocky bastard (although I am a big consumer of that trope heh). Jungkook is actually canonly incredibly insecure. He lacks a real sense of self, which is why he is so desperate for Kiri back. His relationship with Kiri at that time was a big part of what he thought was himself. He has somewhat of low self esteem tbh which is why he’ll go back to a woman who treated him unfairly. That’s why he comes off the way he does in the first chapter and why Y/N thinks he has a big ego... he’s overcompensating. He finds it so endlessly fascinating that Y/N, in all her confident glory, was actually once super insecure. He admires her all the more once she opens up about her past.
“Oh, Rosa is an intern for our hometown’s newspaper but between you and me those assholes don’t even let her write. She does coffee and burger runs for men in charge. And Lia sells ice cream at the mall.”
“What about your brother?” Jungkook asked.
“He’s training to be a cop just like my dad.”
“And your mom?”
“She works at a convenience store.”
All their careers resemble people in the latest Stranger Things season (Nancy, Steve, Hopper, and Joyce). Fun Cameo there.
“What’s wrong?” You wondered, following his eyes.
“October 16th, 1985. 6:48PM.”
“Yes. That’s today’s date and time. What about it?” You pressed, growing confused.
“Remember it.” He warned.
“Why?”
“It’s when I fell in love with you.”
This iconic line I actually got from the real Jeon Jungkook himself. While Jungkook wasn’t actually in love with Y/N here, it certainly was a cute way for him to express his admiration for her.
OH HERE’S A FUN FACT: the hickey scene at the end of this chapter where JK and Y/N kiss for the first time was actually supposed to be Yara giving Y/N the hickey like the best friend she is. Ultimately I went with JK giving it for... smut purposes... ≖‿≖ 
CHAPTER FOUR – THE HALLOWEEN PARTY
The decision for Y/N to be Freddie Krueger came from me planning to be him for Halloween. And I was! JK as Glen Lantz just followed naturally. I’ve seen some great edits of him as the character. Truly chef’s kiss.
I really liked that Jungkook came over to the girl’s dorm to get ready. I didn’t want a scene where Y/N was thrown into a situation she was uncomfortable with which is how much Nerd At A Party Scene go so made sure Jungkook stayed by her side throughout the part, going out of his way to introducing her to the people he cared about.
Tae’s character came in when I realized I needed a way to actually put Y/N’s event in motion. He was the missing link and BOY did you guys eat his character right up huh. Love that for me.
Another thing, the confrontation with Kiri was so hard to write guys, I reeaaaally struggle with girl conflict. GIRLS SHOULD SUPPORT GIRLS. However, not everyone gets along in real life so I went with Kiri being more along the lines of petty rather than outwardly a cunt to Y/N. Realistically, Kiri is popular and well liked among the greek life so being unkind to someone she hardly knows wouldn’t make sense. There’s definitely tension between these two but I tried my best to steer away from the typical cat fight/revenge porn/public humiliation trope most movies seem to follow.
CHAPTER FIVE – THE FIRST TIME
Introduction to Erik!!!! It was really important to me that Y/N had a life before Jungkook. That's why I wrote in Y/N having a fiancé. She’s not opposed to love, she just has reshifted her focus. She knows what she wants and is choosing to focus on that, which why when she realizes she’s falling for Kookie she’s so hesitant to admit it because she’s fallen down that road before. Even though Jungkook treats her with respect and acknowledges the parts of her she’s most proud of, she just isn’t willing to possibly give up her passions for love. Which is why she doesn’t immediately confess to him, even once she’s sure she loves him.
“I’m serious, nerd. You’re like… um… the sun!” Jungkook marveled, eyes growing full as the realization dawned on him.
“The sun?” You laughed.
“Yeah, like… you’re this bright, beautiful thing that seems like it’s here in front of me but is really light-years away.”
Jungkook was drunk, and although you were sure he was making more sense in his head, you couldn’t help but feel your face grow hot, unsure of how to react to his drunk analogy.
“You’re the sun, Y/N. You make the world turn for you. Never orbit for anyone else.”
And suddenly, you were kissing him, for no other reason other than you wanted to and that it felt like the right thing to do.
No real commentary here. Just love this bit. It’s probably my favorite interaction between them two ‧⁺◟( ᵒ̴̶̷̥́ ·̫ ᵒ̴̶̷̣̥̀ ) 
“Also… She’s, uh, currently dating Eunwoo.” You told Yara.
Your best friend blinked, silence falling over her.
“Yara?”
“Good for her.” She perked up almost forcibly. “Let her put up with his annoying ass.”
Yara could see the way your expression had turned dubious as if you didn’t believe her nonchalant act.
Yara turned up her nose defensively, “What?”
Ugh yes, some character development from Yara.... the flavor ! Yara (much like Y/N and JK) also struggles with love. She has a real fear of commitment and if far more comfortable with casual sex than relationships. She did develop actual feelings for Eunwoo, she just wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment so she cut him off. Fleed the scene if you will. Typical gemini smh my head.
"I don’t think the contract mentioned orgasms.” Jungkook smirked as you released his thumb.
“I say we let it slide.” You shrugged, leaning into him casually.
“You think?”
“Totally. Think of it as… a bonding activity.” You joked, resting your chin on his shoulder, peering up through your lashes.
“Damn, we’re really committed to this fake dating thing, huh.”
You laughed in the way that you hated, but Jungkook loved; it was loud and abrupt, but it genuine, and it was you.
“What can I say, I’m a method actor.” You sighed dramatically, causing Jungkook to grin before pressing a kiss to your nose, simply because he liked the way it always seemed to make you smile.
GOD THEY’RE SO WHIPPED FOR EACH OTHER ITS DISGUSTING!!!!!! I’m really happy I decided not to make sleeping together a big deal and I got a lot of feedback from you guys agreeing! I had a lot of fun with these two’s sex scenes knowing they could do it whenever they wanted.
CHAPTER SIX – THE STEM EVENT
I started the scene with smut BUT I wanted to point out that much of their time spent together is at Y/N dorm, Jungkook either napping, hanging out or doing work as Y/N would study like she always did. I liked the idea that Jungkook would get bored and would want attention from Y/N because she was so focused. Idk, I just wanted to write a love story about two people spending time together and figuring out how they fit in each other’s lives as opposed to some dramatic I mEeT HiM aNd mY LiFe bEcAmE cRaZy. There’s nothing wrong with that plot line, I just didn’t want that for these two dorks. I wanted Y/N to interact with JK’s scene and crowd but not give up her own which is why most days JK and her just lounged around in her dorm studying.
Also, I don’t know how the teacher/student roleplay made it into the smut, it just did, no further questions (ʃ⌣́_⌣́ƪ).
Then the event scene.
“You’re whipped, dude! Seriously.”
Jungkook felt his face go red, “Shut up, no, I’m not.”
“Hey, I’m not judging. I get it. That’s your girl.” Taehyung shrugged. Jungkook placed a hand on the fold up table in front of him, staring down at the information pamphlet you had worked so hard on.
“She’s just… so fucking driven and passionate about everything she does. Sometimes I look at her, and I’m just like… holy shit, what am I doing with a girl like her? I feel like she’s totally out of my league and being with me is holding her back but— I dunno, man. I just… really like her.” Jungkook revealed, voice growing small.
An unexpected wave of tenderness fell over the two boys, Taehyung throwing an arm over his little brother’s shoulder.
“I’m happy for you, bro.”
Jungkook didn’t know it just yet but dude was talking from the heart and, is in fact, totally whipped :’c
I loved the confrontation scene between the boys and Eunwoo because the boys standing up for Yara really did make everyone feel like a friend group, not just some character who happen to exist at the same time. It wasn’t just Y/N and Yara and one side and the boys on the other. They would all become friends, which is ideal to me. A boyfriend who likes your best friend and considers her a friend so you can all hang out??? Yes please.
Initially, irl Yara and I had noooo clue if Yara would end up with Eunwoo or not. That was actually the original goal actually. But after this chapter four, you guys made it ABUNDANTLY clear that you guys wanted to see Taeyara, despite the two never even meeting! Honestly, it wasn’t until this chapter was written that we decided for sure that Eunwoo was out of the picture for Yara. Part of me really wanted to keep Yara single, but irl Yara insisted on dick and frankly, she’s right. Bitchin’ Yara deserved a shot at love. She definitely has her own story outside of Bitchin’ and will experience a lot of growth in the future.
“God, I know. I do not miss that temper of his.” She chuckled, her words piquing your interest.
“Temper?”
“Oh, yeah. Have you seriously not experienced it yet? He’s got some gnarly anger issues. Not to mention all the lying…” Kiri paused suddenly, straightening up as she flashed you an apologetic look. “Yikes, I’m sorry. I totally should not be telling you this. I’m not trying to be that gross girl that shit talks her ex to his current girlfriend.”
Miss Kiri, Miss Kiri. She really acted up this chapter didn’t she. There was a lot of discussion about whether or not those things she said about Jungkook were true. Which was exactly what I wanted hehe. We come to find out that Kiri had definitely stretched the truth. She really is good at manipulation and understanding how people think and it’s why she is in the role that she is in. Messy queen.
CHAPTER SEVEN – THE ROOFTOP DATE
This entire chapter was inspired by High School Musical with Troy and Gabriella’s rooftop garden scenes. This was my shortest chapter and honestly, probably not my strongest. I definitely went into writing this with zero concept of what I actually wanted to happen. Usually when I write my chapters I have a 4k long outline of it beforehand that I go off of. Not this one though. I really just winged it and I tried my best to write a chapter that really showed off (dialogue wise) just how this couple bounces off each other. I do really like some of the banter they have in this chapter.
You had taken note a little wooden popsicle stick poking up from the soil of the yellow flowers. Acacias, they were marked. Pulling your knees up to your chest, you considered his words.
Yellow acacias stands the value of true friendship and can indicate a secret love! I thought that was very appropriate given these dummies' relationship.
“So, you probably know why I brought you here.”
You nodded.
“You’re proposing, right?”
“Yeah, I– oh, shut up.” He laughed, the serious mood shattering as you joined him.
Even though I knew they were going to have a semi serious talk, what with Y/N asking about what Kiri had told her, these two dufuses realistically are just too comfortable with each other to stay serious for too long.
“Hey, I said that out of frustration, I didn’t really mean it. I’m sure she’ll come crawling back soon.” You attempted to comfort him, hoping to sound sincere.
“Even if that’s true, I’m not entirely sure I want that anymore.”
“What?” You blinked. Jungkook shrugged.
“What about us?” He met your eyes, causing your breath to hitch.
“What about us?”
Jungkook stared at you for a moment, noting the way the timber in your voice had become higher pitched as if panicked.
MORE FUN FACTS LMFAO: I typically do this thing with unplanned chapters where I just go for it and write and usually it works out. But when I wrote this down I remember stopping and being like ??? WHY DID I JUST WRITE THAT ??? I don’t like deleting my writing so I had a serious think to myself about whether this was going to be the moment Jungkook confessed or not.
Canonly, I decided that Jungkook did in fact mean ‘us’ in a romantic sense, but because of the way you perceivably panicked at that possible meaning, he decided against taking the conversation in that direction, instead speaking about ‘us’ in a platonic sense. Poor kookie :(
“Stop. Listen to me, Jungkook, you’re a fucking great guy, okay? You’re charismatic and funny and care about your friends… sure, you almost ruined my event, but it was mostly to defend my best friend when Eunwoo got too pushy, right? You’re a good guy, meathead. I know I joke about your ego, but I really believe you’re capable of more than you think you are. Seriously, Kiri is so lucky to be the object of your affection.”
Jungkook watched the way the sun’s orange light kissed your face, a bittersweet feeling growing in his chest as he contemplated the object of his affection. Just a couple of months ago, he would have had no doubt about who held his heart, but as you held his stare, he found himself unsure and yet, entirely sure all the same.
“Jungkook? You okay?” You frowned, catching in the sadness in his eyes.
“Hm? Yeah, yeah. I just… realized something.”
“Oh? What’s that?”
“…It doesn’t matter.” He smiled, the gesture hardly reaching his eyes.
It’s in this moment that Jungkook decides that there is no way you hold the same affection towards him that he does to you. He mistakes your words of comfort as you pushing him away. You are so kind and encouraging and Jungkook loves you so much that hearing you insist about him ending back up with Kiri hurts him so bad.
But you are still unsure about your feelings and genuinely believe that's still what Jungkook wants. You’re just being a supportive friend!! :( It isn’t until the end of this chapter when Y/N has her talk with Yara that she realizes, oh man, she’s in deep.
CHAPTER EIGHT – THE MISTAKE
BLAH. This chapter is so BLAH, you know? Having to write this chapter was SO HARD. I texted irl Yara complaining about how much I hated having to put my characters through this and that I wanted to just end the story on chapter 7 and keep them happy forever. BUT ALAS! I had planned for this to happen from the start.
You tasted like the mint of your favorite brand of toothpaste. He imagined if he had caught you any later then the mint would have been accompanied by the taste of coffee, knowing the way you rarely started a day without a cup.
God, he had missed the taste of you.
What you guys didn’t see is Jungkook spending the night with Kiri, and immediately kicking her out, freaking out as the weight of guilt washed over him. He knew he had done nothing wrong, that you weren’t his real girlfriend, and that getting back together with Kiri was exactly what he had signed up for. It was what he should’ve wanted. But it wasn't… because you were what he wanted. And that was exactly what he was going to tell you as he marched over to your apartment.
But he panicked. His mind already decided that your answer to him would be no– that you didn’t feel the same. So he kissed you. He had you in the only way he was allowed to. He was selfish and impulsive and so incredibly scared that he ended up hurting the person he loved the most.
Initially though, I had Jungkook get back together with Kiri, not that he slept with her right before sleeping with Y/N. But I decided TEEHEE let me just make everything erupt into flames. However, I didn’t realize just how angry with Jungkook you guys would get. I remember thinking DAMMIT WAS THAT TOO SCANDALOUS?? I knew I was going to have to work hard for Jungkook to redeem himself to my readers.
“She wants to get back together.” Jungkook swallowed dryly, eyes wavering between yours as if to gauge your reaction.
“…Oh.”
You shook your head.
“I mean, wow! That’s… That’s great!” You smiled, something tearing apart inside you as the words left your lips.
“Y/N–”
“Seriously! This means it worked, right? This is exactly what you wanted to happen.” You enthused, turning your head so that he couldn’t see the way your eyes had welled up.
Jungkook’s heart was pounding in his ears, fighting the urge to wrap his arms around you.
“Yeah… yeah, no, you’re right. We did it.” He replied monotonously.
GOD THIS PART IS SO UNBELIEVABLY FRUSTRATING! JUST ADMIT YOU LOVE EACH OTHER YOU MORONS! This entire situation is so convoluted because there's so much information missing and not being expressed, I seriously want to ring my own neck rereading this bit.
“Are you mad?” He called out cautiously, a heavy feeling falling onto his chest.
“Why would I be mad?” You quipped back sharply, causing Jungkook to flinch. He shifted in his seat uncomfortably.
“I just thought… I mean we’ve been fooling around a lot lately, so I didn’t know if—”
“If what? I had feelings for you?” You scoffed. “Please, as if I’d ever fall for you.”
And there it was— everything Jungkook already knew but had been so afraid to hear. Of course, you didn’t feel for him what he felt for you. How could he have expected anything different?
IDIOTS!!! THEY'RE BOTH IDIOTS!!! I don't know how y'all put up with this for so long. Forgive me.
CHAPTER NINE – THE BREAK
Okay I actually love this chapter. And for many reasons. Let me break down the three scenes for you guys.
Scene one: Kiri confrontation
Kiri is definitely an opposing antagonist. She is constantly working against Y/N because of their interests directly conflicting. BUT. I would argue that the biggest antagonist to this story is the inner ones – Y/N and Jungkook's lack of ability to admit their feelings constantly holding them both back from their happy ending. That being said, a confrontation scene between Y/N and Kiri was MUCH needed. While I suppose I can understand why Kiri doesn't like Y/N, that doesn't change the fact that she has been disrespectful and catty. So miss Y/N had to put Miss Kiri in her place (•̀ᴗ•́)
Scene two: Yara and Tae at the library
Fanservice. That is all. LMFAOOO y'all reallllyyy wanted it to happen and who am I to deny my people what they want. It was really fun getting to explore my side characters and develop them through interactions outside the two main characters. IRL Yara also mentioned giving bitchin’ Yara and Tae their own chapter as a joke and I was like LOL BET. I fully was going to but then I got the idea for the next scene and was like ahh ok maybe not the whole chapter.
Scene three: Meeting with Erik
So. This was a SUPER last minute decision. Like, it wasn’t until I was writing this chapter that I planned on Erik making an appearance. I saw a tweet with someone saying their bitchin theories and they mentioned Erik appearing out of nowhere and I was like,,, HOLD ON!!!! That could be kind of spicy ≖‿≖ 
I knew for a fact JK was NOT going to be forgiven in this chapter; I needed a way to lay the situation out between the two dorks without trying to seem like I was trying to sway my audience in a way that didn't make sense to the story. Y/N was rightfully angry. But she wasn't only angry about the timing of the sex. She was angry that Jungkook went back to Kiri at all and there was no way she was going to admit that. So who better to lay it all out than calculated, unbiased third party Erik. He deserved some character development after all.
I also liked the idea that Y/N had, in theory, “romantic options.” Losing Jungkook didn’t mean the end of her life. Having my female lead stand on her own was very important to me.
CHAPTER TEN – THE END
RIGHT OF THE BAT I needed Jungkook to suffer. So that whole scene where he tries to interact with his old group only for his presence to make everything awkward MMMM yes, sweet revenge on my part.
You were surprised. His hair was no longer shaggy and long like you remembered it. Instead, it had been freshly cut, looking healthy and neatly styled for the first time since you met Jungkook.
THE WAY SO MANY PEOPLE COMMENTED ON THIS LINE “but Y/N liked it long?!?”  IS SO FUNNNYyyyy. So let me clarify a thing. Jungkook had always wanted to cut his hair right. The only reason he didn’t was because Y/N told him not to. With Y/N no longer in the picture to convince him out of it, he cut his hair. That’s really all there is to it skfjsjf.
You know, I had written this part around the time I had just finished up the third ch believe it or not. And it was COMPLETELY different. I had it planned that Yara and Y/N ignored him throughout class and Yara had gone back after the bell rang to go verbally assault JK. And as the two hashed it out, only then was that when Jungkook would realize that he liked Y/N after Yara literally spelled it out for him.
“You like her, dumbass!” Was what I had written Yara saying. I really had written him in denial for ten chapters, I was a whole sociopath (╥﹏╥). But ultimately, I decided that Jungkook came to that conclusion on his own and the decision to apologize to Y/N would have been made over winter break.
“You said Kiri came over asking for you back, yet you still came over and slept with me the next day. Even though the two of you had sex the night before. Do you understand how that makes me feel?”
“I’m—”
“Like garbage!" You emphasized, the white paint of the door somehow irritating you further. "I felt like I was something you threw away and picked back up whenever you felt like getting your dick wet.”
Your chest was rising and falling rapidly, and you tried your hardest to not let your emotions get the best of you.
“Not to mention to everyone else, it looks like you cheated on me. Which makes me look like a fucking idiot." You scoffed.
Jungkook said nothing in reply, which somehow made it easier to say all you should have said that day in your room.
“It just sucks to realize that someone you once cared about sees you as nothing more than a toy. It fucking sucks.”
Man :( writing this hurt my heart. I really, really, love bitchin!y/n and writing her hurting freaking stinks. But she had to speak her mind. She deserves the chance to get everything off her chest with the way Jungkook hurt her.
Your heart and mind were in constant paradox, torn between wanting him back and wanting him to know just how much he had hurt you. Your mind ultimately won the battle, of course, but as Jungkook stood just a few inches of drywood apart pouring his heart out, it was hard to say which major organ was responsible for your next words.
The creak of the door being pushed open sent Jungkook's eyes wide, revealing your hesitant form. You had your arms crossed over your chest as if to guard the contents inside of it.
You looked like an angel underneath the bathroom's blue fluorescent lights, beautiful and lovely, a stark contrast from your next crushing sentence.
“I slept with Erik.”
Hehe. Ofc my girl Y/N had to have a rebound!!! She knows that life goes on. However, as I wrote in, she definitely regretted it. It was kind of the same situation that Jungkook was in where he pursued something just because it was familiar and a distraction and not because he really wanted it. Both Y/N and Jungkook are flawed characters but that’s okay! If anything, Y/N’s mistake of sleeping with Erik is what allows her to forgive Jungkook. Knowing first hand how complicated their entire relationship really was.
“I don’t need you… but I don’t think I want a life without you.” You finished shyly.
Your eyes were locked with his when suddenly a small noise escaped him, eyes pulling away from yours as his head moved to attempt to hide the way his eyes had grown wet.
I got this line from one of my best friends after her ex broke up with her. It made me physically sad and really sympathize with her so I quickly wrote it down into my notes app to save for later LMAOOOO. Knowing that you are your own person and life will inevitably go on after losing someone, but that your heart still wants and is pleading for the one person you can’t have. SO SAD. I’m happy I got to use this line in one of my fics.
The note Jungkook wrote Y/N,,, imagine him not being able to sleep one night over winter break so he just writes down everything he should have told Y/N while he still had the chance…. I’ll for real cry dude, he’s so cute. Also, the line about him buying you fluffy Halloween socks for Christmas went over people’s heads I think but HECK I THOUGHT THAT WAS SO FUNNY AND SWEET (because Y/N bought Christmas socks when it was Halloween teehee).
"Are you two dorks done crying?" Yara’s voice rang out suddenly, causing both of you to jump apart.
"Yara, you creep! Privacy, dude! Ever try knocking?" You sniffed, wiping at your face hurriedly.
"What? Like you were peeing with Jungkook in the bathroom? Please." She waved you off, walking back into the living room to give you two some privacy. She did say Jungkook had 15 minutes before she’d have to come back in after all. "Anyway, Tae will be over in 10 minutes for the Saved By The Bell marathon that’s on so you guys are more than welcomed to join." She called out from her newly seated position on the couch.
I included this scene with Yara because things were getting too serious for my liking ngl. Plus the idea that the four of them would all come together at the end for a much needed reunion made my happy bitchin heart soar.
Jungkook let out a laugh, his palm finding your cheek, eyes locked on your lips. You were preening for his kiss, mouth parting slightly as you anticipated it.
“Partners?”
The question took you by surprise, eyes widening at your not so pretend lover.
Idiot.
“Partners.” You smiled softly, eyes shiny and brimming with tears as he kissed you for what must have been the millionth time, but still somehow felt like the first.
UGH I LOVE THEM I REALLY DO. I was so happy with how this final scene came out :( They’re partners, they really are I miss these boneheads.
AND NOW, I PRESENT THE CANON FUTURE OF THE BITCHIN UNIVERSE...
10 YEARS LATER
Let’s be honest, Jungkook popped the question the day of graduation, he can’t imagine a life in which you wouldn’t be beside him
You said yes (shocker)
Cue Jungkook being the most wonderful partner and respecting your wish to finish your residency program before having the wedding
You absolutely kick ass at being a neonatal surgeon
Also, Jungkook started a film company! It’s small but he loves what he does and works with colleges and helps out the film majors with resources and equipment <3
SO IT'S THE DAY OF YOUR WEDDING RIGHT
Yara and your sisters are helping you get ready, with your best friend as the ever so reassuring maid of honor
And by that I mean you’re as calm as a cucumber and Yara is one wrong move away from having a stroke
“Y/N… Don’t freak out....The catering company put in two orders of shrimp instead of chicken and steak.”
“Yara, it’s okay.”
“NO ITS NOT???? THIS IS YOUR WEDDING DAY AND YOU’RE GETTING CRUSTACEANS.”
Y/N making Yara take a seat and practice some breathing exercises so she doesn’t upset the baby
Oh yeah, Yara is 10 weeks pregnant
Taehyung is the dad lol
Yara and Taehyung have been together ever since that day at the library hehe <3
They moved in together and adopted a cat and everything (sweet boy Tae wanted a dog but Yara’s afraid of dogs and Tae would do anything for that woman so Yeontan the cat it is)
Yara refuses to put a label on their relationship even after all this time, and Tae doesn’t ask for one. They’re happy and dedicated to each other and don’t feel the need to put pressure on something that’s already so perfect
Yara is actually violently in love with Tae but still scoffs when Y/N tries to bring it up
“Oh my god, you’re so in love with him”
“Huh??? you must be sick or something. Get well soon, damn :/”
Yara likes to come up with different labels for Taehyung every time she has to introduce him. Among her favorites are roommate, rent sharer, baby daddy and penis lender
Speaking of Taehyung, he’d have a hand on Jungkook’s shoulder as he tries to calm down the panicking groom to be
“JK, breathe.”
“What if she doesn’t show up? What if she doesn’t want to marry me? What if I pressured her into this and— and I’ve freaked her out and now she hates me?”
“Dude, you guys have been engaged for eight years. She’s had her opportunity to run. She’ll show up.”
Taehyung scruffing up the younger man’s hair reassuringly, which only flusters him more because DAMMIT he wants to look perfect for you and now his hair is messed up >:(
(You like him no matter what his hair looks like though)
Jungkook literally swallowing down a sob as you walk down the aisle and he lays his eyes on you for the first time
You having a dumb smile on your face the entire walk over because your husband to be is crying and you haven’t even exchanged vows yet
The entire audience going all sobby when you finally do exchange vows because they’re so beautiful and real
The ten years together has not been easy— from financial struggles as you tried to support yourself through med school, to personal conflicts when Jungkook wanted to start a family already
But you guys figured it out
You always do
He’s your person. And you are his.
Y/N’s sisters Rosa and Lia are a WRECK— even your dad is tearing up
Your family loves Jungkook and have been counting down the days until you guys married, let’s be honest
“You may now kiss the bride.”
Jungkook punching the air with a “FINALLY!” before kissing the hell out of you
The cutting of the cake inevitably turning into a food fight
The shrimp entrees turning out to be pretty damn good
Yara catching the bouquet and wagging her brows at Taehyung suggestively
Jungkook pulling you aside to take photos of you outside the venue because you look so so pretty and he loves the way you smile when he’s the one behind the camera
The party is in full session, your siblings tearing up the dance floor like the extroverts they are
You and Jungkook are sat at the head of the room, hands intertwined underneath the table as you watch a tired and painfully sober Yara swing her bare feet onto Taehyung’s lap, requesting a foot rub
Watching your pregnant best friend and her lover together, you turned towards your own, smile impossibly wide
“What?”
“Let’s have a baby.” You’d grin, so stupid happy
Jungkook’s eyes going round and immediately jumping up from his seat because god that’s all he’s ever wanted
Being tugged out the room by a giddy Jungkook, one of your heels flinging off somewhere behind you.
“What’s happening? Where are we going?!”
The two of you find yourself in a storage room somewhere on the hotel floor
“Jeon Jungkook, what the hell—“
His mouth find yourself, kissing you in a way that couldn’t at the altar
You kissed him back without questions, arms wrapping around the man you now called your husband
“I love you.” He’d sigh into your neck, his hot breath causing you to shiver
“I love you too.”
“Let’s make a baby.”
“Yeah let’s— wait, right here? Right now?!”
Jungkook merely nodding as his mouth found the exposed skin of your chest
“Meathead, we can’t just ditch our wedding to have sex!”
“Why not? We did our marital duties. Now it’s our guests' job to get embarrassingly drunk and make a fool of themselves on the dance floor. No one will even miss us.”
“Isn’t baby making what our honeymoon is for?”
“Screw that. I’ve done my waiting. Let’s start our family, nerd.”
Jungkook kissing your protests silent before you inevitably give in and let him take you right there and then, your wedding dress hung around your hips
Husband and wife coming together with shaky breaths and hushed moans as they promise the rest of their lives to each other, making every argument, struggle or moment of uncertainty leading up to now totally worth it
Walk of shame back into the party with nervous hair fixing from you and a proud grin from Jungkook
Yara figuring out exactly why you two had sneaked off to, flashing the newly weds a knowing smirk
The night of your wedding, Jungkook surprises you with a present
You unwrap it in confusion, only to see that it’s a glass frame and inside of it is the wrinkled and worn out lined paper the two of you had scribbled on many many years ago
Jungkook hangs up the contract right above your bed as per your request, smiling as he does and jumping on him the moment he puts down the hammer bc dammit it you’re too heckin excited to make love with your sentimental loser of a husband
And yes, by the next month, you are pregnant and incredibly happy
And of course, your daughter and Yara’s son grow up to be best friends, not a family holiday passing by where they aren’t told the story of the totally bitchin’ way both set of their parents got together
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You Called Me Sweet
Barson (pre-relationship kind of) drabble, very mild angst, slightly fluffy, using the prompt - "H-how long have you been standing there?"
WC: 1277
***
“H-how long have you been standing there?” he asked, his face burning when he turned to the look at the door and saw her stood in the doorway, leaning to one side, arms folded across her chest, a small smile on her face. She looked as lovely as she always did.
“Long enough.” she shrugged, stepping into his inner sanctum, “you really went to bat for me, huh?”
He threw his phone down violently on his desk, growling some Spanish words she didn’t catch under his breath before stalking back and forth, his mind racing.
“We’re partners, ‘Liv. I’m not going to let anyone threaten you like that. If Buchanan thinks he’s going to hold me to ransom he’s got another thing coming. Slimy arrogant bastard!” Rafael spat, his eyes burning, his fists clenched at his side.
“In all the years I’ve known him, he’s always been like that. It’s why he’s a defence attorney. He doesn’t care about anything except his own reputation and having his clients found not guilty - no matter the cost to others.” she replied, sounding exhausted and unsurprised at this antics.
“That’s not acceptable, I’m not allowing that to happen.” he said firmly, slamming a hand on the desk.
“Raf, I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself.” she sighed, shaking her head.
“That’s not the point. He can’t make wild accusations just to try and torpedo our case. And threatening you, there’s the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard. Does he really think your squad isn’t loyal to you? And that you don’t conduct yourself without complete integrity?” replied Rafael, his voice getting angrier and louder, echoing through the room.
“I think he’s betting that he can distract enough from his client to win. It’s not a new strategy, Rafael. We’ve seen it a million times. And sometimes it works, Buchanan is bluffing but a cop has cut a corner, and he gets what he wants.” she shrugged, stepping towards his desk and resting her hands on the back of the chair positioned opposite it.
“It’s infuriating!” he spat, his eyes blazing bright.
“I know it is. But please don’t worry about me. Worry about Rachel, and this case, and getting her the justice that she deserves.” she smiled gently, secretly touched that Rafael was defending her so vigorously.
“I’m always going to worry about you, ‘Liv. That’s what best friends do.” he gave her that half grin that made her knees go weak if she was honest. This time there was also something about his tone of voice that made her breath catch.
“Would it make you feel better if I take a step back and let Fin and Amanda take over?” she asked quietly, focussing on her own hands, and not his face, “they’ve been just as involved as I have. If we did that, would it help your case?”
“I can’t ask you to do that.” replied Rafael sighing and shaking his head.
“Would it help the case?” she repeated more firmly, looking up quickly and staring him down.
“Probably. I know I’d feel a lot better if Buchanan isn’t anywhere near you. I trust you but I would rather not have this hanging over us.” he grumbled, running his hands through his hair – a trademark sign of his uncertainty about the situation.
“Then that’s what we’ll do. If you’re free tomorrow, we can all meet, make sure this case is a solid as it can be, and that we win. And I will keep well away from it.”
“Are you micromanaging me?” he chuckled, tilting his head to watch her more closely.
“Just a little. But it’s only for your own good.” she smiled.
“I thought I was the one who was protecting you?” he replied again, moving from behind his desk to perch on the side, arms folded across his chest.
“Who said we can’t protect each other? Isn’t that how partners work?” she asked gently, her eyes warm and fixed on his.
“Very true.” he chuckled.
“For the record I think it’s very sweet that you want to defend my honour.”
“I don’t think anyone has described me as anything remotely akin to ‘sweet’ before.” he snorted, resting his hands on the edge of the desk, gripping the surface tightly, hesitance filling him as he was sure if she complimented him anymore, he would lose his mind.
“Well, you are, Rafael Barba.” she said quietly, as she stepped forwards, a slight blush gracing her lovely cheeks, “thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” he replied as smoothly as he could when she was stood so close, practically between his legs, her perfume wafting through the tiny amount of air between them.
She moved to press a kiss to his cheek, her hand coming up to clutch his shoulder as she did. In response he moved a hand to her waist, savouring the warmth of her body detectable through her thin blouse, one finger slipped under the fabric, and he could touch her skin. He gulped and closed his eyes and breathed her in, the feel of her lips on his now rough cheek, her fingers delicately curled into his shirt, her scent – subtle and powerful all at once. She was heaven.
“You want to get a drink?” she whispered; her face impossibly close to his.
“No.” he murmured, his hand tightening on her waist, the other coming up to stroke her cheek.
She blushed and looked down, sighing, “Dinner?”
“No.” he shook his head, pulling her closer so her free hand landed on his chest to steady herself, his thumb now tracing the line of her jaw, his eyes nearly black as he refused to look away from her.
For a second, she knew this wasn’t a good idea, it was a terrible idea. They prided themselves that despite their close bond, they had never allowed it to go further than that. But as he caressed her skin and stared at her as if she was the only person in the world, she knew that there was a reason she wasn’t pulling away.
He saw the flicker in her eyes as she had her lightning bolt realisation, and suddenly, their lips were locked together. She had never been kissed like this, passionate but gentle, he was sweet; he was confident, and loving, and so fucking sexy. His hands had moved to her lower back, desperately trying to clutch her closer, as if he desired their bodies to meld into one. And then when she felt his groan vibrate through her body she smiled into the kiss, and he pulled back.
“I’m curious what Buchanan accused me of now.” she whispered across his cheek, her lips nuzzling his face, Rafael leaning into it, rejoicing that this phenomenal woman was finally this close to him.
“Ironically, he accused you of being romantically involved with someone in the NYPD and you not disclosing.” he murmured across her skin, his lips tasting the sweet curve of her throat now and she sank into his body.
She looked shocked for a second before she burst out laughing and rested her forehead to his, breathing in deeply and relishing this new intimacy between them.
“Think we all need some irony in our lives, don’t we? Besides, technically you don’t work for the NYPD.” she replied, pressing a lingering kiss to his forehead.
“A technicality that I’m incredibly thankful for right now. Honestly, Olivia, I can live without irony if I can have you.” he replied smoothly and she smiled brilliantly, before touching her lips to his again. It turned out Buchanan had been right, though neither of them ever told him that.
***
@igreg04 @mhargitay64 @tinyboxxtink @lauchasstuff @nippow @chasingeverybreakingwave @i-run-with-scissors39 @barsonlover2021 @michael-rooker @alwaysachorusgirl @storiesofsvu @chunex @klk1618 @simpforbarba @dubuforeveralone @zizzlekwum @tinyboxxtink @human––tragedy @a-queen-of-chaos @raulesparza4eva @thatesqcrush @boredhufflepuff @321pm @giveyouakidney @just-vibin21 @talk-to-me-babygirl
I don't think I've missed anyone on the tag list, charming daughter has hidden my phone and it was saved on there and I'm using my laptop to post! I've also started tagging anyone who has liked or reblogged previous drabbles - if you don't want to be included I won't take offence - just let me know! :D
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wylanvnneck · 3 years
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This 2 part fic was written for the Secret Snusband Gift Giveaway hosted by @jurdannet​ and @jurdannetrevels​ for my lovely Knife Wife @lilacs-with-lavender​.
Rating: T for Tyrannosaurus
Summary: Inspired by an episode of my favourite Cop TV show, ‘Castle’, in which a bet takes place with pretty high stakes, although the plotline has been tweaked to fit this fandom. My Knife Wife said she loved the Enemies to Lovers trope so that’s what I’ve (tried to) write here and I hope you enjoy the story of Homicide Detectives Jude Duarte and Cardan Greenbriar and their mutual enmity.
Warnings: Not so graphic descriptions of murder and mention of drugs. (Really not sure what I need to tag, so please let me know if I’ve missed something.)
Posted as a Gift on AO3 | Part 2 | Masterlist
Part 1
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“Victim’s name is Taryn Santorini, a metal sculptor by trade, she was found by her doorman fifteen minutes before we traced the address in Chloe’s hand back to her.” 
Detective Jude Duarte looks down at the motionless face of a scared looking brunette, a crimson splatter painting the tiled floor around her lifeless body. The room around her is a mess, clothes scattered everywhere, bed ruffled and unmade and metal figurines placed haphazardly throughout the little apartment.
“Lil, talk to me, what are we looking at?”
Before the white-blonde haired medical examiner crouched on the floor by the body can answer, a smooth dark voice that Jude so detests cuts through the air behind her.
“Why, Duarte, I’d say that the fact that Tara What’s-her-name was shot and killed is rather obvious.” The despicable excuse of a detective steps forward, a smug grin pasted to his face. Cardan Greenbriar, entitled little rich boy, over-confident bastard and sadly, her partner.
Patience, Jude reminds herself, patience was a virtue. 
“I meant, as I’m sure Lil knows, with what model was she killed and when?”
Liliver shoots her an amused sympathetic look before turning her gaze back to the victim.
“Looks to be a gun with a 45 caliber, same as the one used to kill Chloe Tatterfell. I’d say Taryn here has been dead for about 12 hours so pretty close to Chloe’s time of death, maybe just a half hour or so afterwards.”
“So chances are it’s the same killer.” Cardan interjects, the smug smile a little less vibrant now. 
“Yep. I’ll have to get her back to the morgue so  I can do a full inspection, see if I can find anything helpful.”
Jude steps back from the crime scene to give her some space, almost bumping in to the officer taking pictures of the area for later use. 
“Thanks, Lil.”
“Just doing my job, sweetie.”
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“This doesn’t make any sense,” Jude clips a glossy picture of their latest victim onto the precinct’s murder board. “Garrett and Van questioned practically all known associates of both Chloe and Taryn and none of them could recognise the other victim. There’s no obvious connection between the two and yet, for some reason they were both killed on the same day, by the same person.”
“And with the same gun.” Cardan is leaning back in his chair, his posture insouciant and his curly black hair falling lazily over his forehead. Surely that was a violation of precinct dress codes? Not that he’d care either way, rule breaker that he was. God knew it was only because of his daddy’s clout that he’d even graduated from the academy in the first place, whilst people like Jude had to work hard and save every penny and fight to get anywhere in the field of Law Enforcement.
“Ok, I’m going to head to the morgue whilst Van and Gare check through the victim’s phones and financials, see if Lil has anything for us.”
“I suppose, being the dutiful partner that I am, I should come with you?” Cardan’s drawl is as irritating as usual and Jude can hardly wait to get out of the proximity of his stupid raven locks and smoldering eyes.
“Please, you’d be doing us both a favour if you didn’t.”
“Aw, come now Jude you know you’d miss me.” He lets out a dramatic sigh as he half heartedly stands from his chair to join her as she speeds by towards the exit and she just barely resists the urge to throttle him.
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Lil bustles around her examining room as she adjusts the fluorescent lamps shining down on both the victim’s bodies’. 
“So, apart from the type of bullets that killed them, the only similarity that I could find between the two victims is the fact that they both have tattoos.”
Jude raises a brow. “Everyone has tattoos.”
From across the autopsy table Cardan’s eyes gleam as he smirks. 
“Oh really? You got some ink on you, Duarte?” 
His tone is disbelieving and Jude can’t resist messing with him a little.
She pastes an obviously fake flirtatious smile on her face and drawls in a sugar sweet voice, “Guess you’d have to find that out on your own, Greenbriar.” 
She bites at her lip for good measure and thinks once more of how bad she would be at flirting in earnest. Lil certainly couldn’t keep the laughter out of her gray eyes. Cardan, however, has a strange look on his face, one that Jude can’t quite decipher, but she’s pretty sure she’s just one-upped him and she can’t deny the slight sense of triumph that the thought gives her.
 She turns her attention back to the victims. “You were saying, Lil?” 
“I’m saying that these tattoos seem to have been done by the same artist. Look,” she pulls back the white cloth covering the body of Chloe Tatterfell, gently pushing a strand of brown hair off of her shoulder to reveal the cartoonish character of a rose, inked in with dark black ink.
She then turns to Taryn’s body to reveal a similarly styled tattoo of a mermaid on her wrist. Just as she’s pulling back the cover Jude’s back pocket vibrates and the sound of her plain ringtone travels through the air. Quickly she swipes upwards to answer the call and it’s Garrett.
“Yo, so we looked through the victims’ phone records and found a connection. Both Chloe and Taryn made a phone call on the day that they were killed to the same number, belonging to a Locke McCutchins, he’s got priors including robberies and domestic assault.”
By the time he’s finished speaking she’s already waved a quick goodbye to Lil and turned to walk out the door, not bothering to check if her partner was behind her.
“Alright, text me his address, let’s go pick him up.”
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“Locke McCutchins, open up, it’s the NYPD!” Garrett bangs on the door and the force is so strong that the wood vibrates as Jude clutches her pistol in her hand, body flat against the wall of Locke’s apartment with Cardan right beside her.
There’s no answer and the door is broken down as she, Cardan, Garrett and Van file into the room in a practiced motion that’s as familiar to her as breathing.
Right in front of them, sprawled across his couch, lies the dead body of Locke McCutchin, his tawny eyes still open and gazing unseeingly up at his ceiling, a dried red patch visible on his shirt.
Garret drops to the floor beside the couch, his sandy hair falling over his face as he leans over to check Locke’s pulse whilst the rest of them look on after having taken note that the apartment was clear.
“Body’s cold, he’s been dead for hours, entry wound looks to be about the same size as the other victims.”
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Jude scrunches her eyebrows as she stands in front of the murderboard for the second time that day.
“So, Chloe Tatterfell, Taryn Santorini and Locke McCuchins were all killed within the span of 24 hours, all with the same gun, presumably by the same killer and yet so far the only connections we’ve found are Taryn’s address that was found written on Chloe’s hand, the phone call from both women to Locke and the similar tattoos on both Chloe and Taryn, but not on Locke.”
“Hmm.” Cardan seems to materialise out of nowhere, carrying a paper cup of what smells like freshly brewed coffee. Jude was convinced that he took his coffee with added alcohol but she had yet to prove it.
“What’s with the glare?” he asks.
“It automatically deploys itself when you're around.”
He scoffs. Twirls his coffee around. Takes a long, slurping sip.
“Hey, Duarte? Don’t get me wrong, I mean, the feeling is mutual, but what exactly is it that makes you despise me so much? I’d like to know so I can make sure to keep doing it.” 
Jude barely deliberates over her answer before she responds. 
“Being an overly cocky, obnoxious jerk who has only managed to get this far thanks to his Daddy’s fat purse will definitely be the best way to make me hate you, trust me.”
He grins but there’s no humour in the curve of his sensual lips, his eyes are cold metal.
“You think that the only reason I’m a detective is because of my father?”
“Yup.” She makes sure to add plenty of emphasis to that one word.
Cardan opens his mouth as if to speak, stops, presses his lips together so hard that they turn pale before the colour returns to them when a slow smile spreads across his face, this time full of humour, but the decidedly darker kind.
“Let’s make a bet. If you can figure out what the connection between our three victims is before I do, I’ll go right up to Captain Madoc myself and request a change of partners so you can be rid of my ‘overly cocky, obnoxious’ self. Deal?” 
He was extending a challenge and Jude was never one to back down from those. Besides, the chance to be rid of him with no cost to herself or her reputation was too good to pass up on. Still, there had to be a catch, with Cardan, there was always a catch.
“And on the complete off-chance that you figure it out first? What happens then?”
“If I figure it out first...you have to come with me as my date to this party that my dad’s having in a couple days.”
Those last few words come out in a rush and Jude has to take a moment to decipher their meaning. Followed by another moment to wonder if she’d somehow completely misunderstood what he’d said.
“You want me to what?”
“Be my date to a party. Honestly Duarte, do you have any idea how many women would jump at this opportunity?” His tone is disgustingly nonchalant. 
“I-” she struggles to find the words. “Take one of them then! Don’t you have a girlfriend, Nicasia or something like that? Blue hair and eyes? High pitched voice? Talks a lot about how much she gets seasick?”
“You know, for someone who’s only met Nicasia once you do remember quite a bit about her.” His steady gaze on her is intense.
For some incorrigible reason Jude has to resist the urge to flush.
“I’m a detective. It’s my job to study people.”
“Right. Sadly, Nicasia and I are no longer together, if we ever were. I got bored. Hence, why I need a date.”
“I’m sure you could just take one of your scores of female admirers, you don’t need me.”
“Is that jealousy that I detect in your voice?”
“Cardan.” 
“Look, the point is, I can’t be bothered having to deal with yet another simpering female who thinks that one night on my arm means a promise to a life-long relationship complete with marriage, a fancy mansion and exactly 2.5 kids. All I want is a companion for one night so I don’t get hounded by my mother for not having a girlfriend by which she can procure some grandchildren.”
“Oh so now you want me to be your fake girlfriend?”
He rolls his eyes up at the ceiling and she fights the urge to slap him. 
“It’s just for one night! Besides, I thought me winning was barely even a possibility to you.”
She makes a noise at the back of her throat. “It is.”
“Then I don’t see what the problem is. Do we have a deal, or not?” He holds out his hand, sculpted eyebrows raised in confrontation.
She doesn’t really think he has much of a chance of figuring it out before her, but he had admittedly also proven adept at figuring certain things out in previous cases so there was definitely no certainty that he wouldn’t win, for all her bravado. Yet, her competitive nature couldn’t bear the thought of surrendering, so she pushes her unease aside and grips his hand in a firm shake. 
“Deal.” 
There’s an awkward moment when he takes a little too long to release her hand from his grip. Once he finally does, the rather pointy tips of his ears reddening, they both turn back to the murder board and the view of their murder time line and crime scene pictures, furiously trying to connect the dots in their heads.
A random thought intrudes in her brain.
"Wait, what if Garrett and Van figure it out before we do?”
As one, she and Cardan both turn towards the opposite side of the office where the two officers in question sat in front of their computers.
Van was typing in data on his computer, eyes glazing over and the tuft of black hair atop his head trembling whilst Garrett, or, The Ghost - as he was sometimes called thanks to his tendency to take months before answering non-work related messages - stood eating glazed donuts with one hand and speaking to someone on the phone held in the other. Jude loved the both of them but she had to admit that they didn’t exactly paint the most inspiring picture. 
Once again she and Cardan are in sync when they promptly turn back towards the murderboard and proclaim, “Nah.”
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Van’s excitement is clearly written on his face when he walks straight up to Jude’s desk the moment she arrives at the precinct the next morning, slamming down a manila folder with the NYPD crest printed on it onto her neatly arranged table top.
Immediately she reaches out to open it, desperate for a break in the case that would not only put a three time killer behind bars but also ensure that she herelf wouldn’t commit murder if she lost the bet and had to pretend to be Cardan’s girlfriend for a night. The thought makes her want to shudder.
“So, I was looking into all of our victim’s financials and I noticed an anomaly. Two weeks ago on the 7th they each deposited 95 hundred dollars into their savings accounts, but we’ve got no way of tracing the money back because the amount is under the IRS’s investigative limit” Van takes a quick pause before continuing, “but that’s not all, both Taryn and Chloe have credit card charges for small amounts at a tattoo place called Fair Folk Inks down in Queens.”
“Great, that’d be the place where they both got tattoos, I’ll go down there and ask the owner a couple questions, thanks Van.” She puts the sheaf of financial accounts back into the folder and takes a quick swig of her usual morning coffee, black, no sugar before preparing to head out once more.  
“Going somewhere, partner?” 
She’d bumped straight into Cardan when stepping into the elevator and she lets out a small groan of frustration as she steps back from his sturdy form. He looks annoyingly chipper, usual cocky smile in place and laughter in his tone as he looks down at her slightly shorter self. His cologne is strong and emanates the scent of the woods and sunlight in the small elevator. The woods and sunlight? Clearly foregoing the rest of her morning coffee hadn’t been a good idea.
She’d thought she could make it out of the building before he finally arrived, necessitating in having to take him along as well, but clearly fate had other ideas. 
“Tattoo parlour. Queens,” she grits out.
“Let’s go then,” his tone is sickly sweet.
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“Hi there, you guys lookin’ to get inked?” asks the pink haired girl behind the counter in fishnet tights and a tank top, looking up from where she is perched on a stool behind the counter when she hears them enter.
The parlour itself is shiny and white, the smooth metal counter and two spaced out black leather tattoo chairs complete with wheeled stools are the only pieces of furniture in the small space. Mounted on the walls are designs, each of them evoking a sense of fantasy. A pixie there, a selkie here, an ornate dragon, all staring right back at Jude as she takes in their surroundings. She takes note of the fact that the pictures staring back at her were very reminiscent of Chloe and Taryn’s tattoos, solidifying her suspicion that this was where they had got them done.
Before she has time to explain the reason for their visit, Cardan pipes up.
“You know, I’ve been thinking of getting one of a slithering snake, maybe across my back? I believe it would add to my already abundant sex appea-”
“Actually,” Jude cuts him off with her most scathing glare, to which he irritatingly responds with a grin. “We’re here on official business, NYPD, we need to speak with the owner of this establishment.” She holds up the badge that she’s just extracted from her plain black wallet as she speaks.
“That would be Vivi, hang tight a sec I’ll go get her.” With a sway of her hips Heather trounces off behind a curtained section at the back of the parlour. 
Unable to stand still for even a few moments, her partner has already wandered over to the corner of the room, pointing at a pinned up design, ““That goblin over there reminds me of Van.”
She ignores him. 
“Oh come on Duarte, you have to admit, there’s a definite resemblance.”
She spares the quickest of glances at the design and it’s true, there’s a striking similarity, but she isn’t about to give him the satisfaction of agreeing so she simply makes a non-committal grunt of recognition.
“Tell me, are you always this tightly wound or is it just for the majority of your day?”
“Excuse me?” Her eyebrows have inadvertently traveled upwards on her face and she can’t believe he has the audacity to say what he just did, although really, she shouldn’t be so surprised.
“Come on Duarte, we’ve been partners for quite a while now and I don’t think I’ve ever even seen you laugh.” He’s standing a few feet away from her, his expression serious, not backing down.
“It’s called being professional.” She can feel the muscles working in her face as she hisses out the words through gritted teeth, blood pounding furiously. 
“Ahem.” She whirls around to find a tall bronze haired woman with striking cat-like eyes that were currently meeting her gaze wearing a lazy look of amusement.  
“Heather said there were some policemen who wanted to ask me some questions?”
Jude cannot believe that she had just gotten so sidetracked by her insolent partner that she’d forgotten why she was currently standing in the middle of a Tattoo parlour in Queens, clutching a set of regular sized close ups of three now dead people. She tamps down the irritation at her own actions as she thrusts out the photos in front of the woman facing her, Vivi, the pink haired girl had said.
“Yes, ma’am, do you recognize these people?”
She watches intently as Vivi carefully peruses the pictures before answering, “I know the two girls, Taryn and Chloe, we’re friends, I’ve even tattooed the both of them. I’m not really sure who he is.”
“Are you sure you don’t know him? Look carefully.” Cardan is all business now, stepping up to Vivi.
“I’m sure.” Vivi’s tone is almost defiant, daring him to question her again.
“You said that you were friends with the girls, how close were you?” 
“They came into the tattoo parlour at the same time about a month ago and we started up a conversation, we exchanged numbers and would meet up for a drink from time to time.” 
“Did they ever meet up with just each other?”
“Not that I’m aware of.”
“Can you think of any reason as to why they’d both be killed by the same person?”
“They’re...they’re dead?”
Jude had intentionally asked the question in a way that would require a reaction and she wasn’t sure that she was entirely convinced by the shocked undertone of Vivi’s voice.
 “I’m afraid so, ma’am.”
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“She’s hiding something.” Once again Jude is back in front of the murderboard, furiously capping and uncapping a whiteboard marker as her mind whirls. She’s full of nervous energy, on the brink of a precipice and she wants nothing more than to be able to push herself off of it.
“Agreed.” Cardan is pacing the floor between her and the murder board and his posture indicates that he’s just as worked up as she is.
“But what I can’t understand is why she would kill two of her acquaintances plus a random vending machine operator, I mean, there’s no clear motive.” She’s barely conscious of the slight pain that tingles as she worries at her bottom lip.
Cardan halts in front of the board, takes a hard look at the scrawled timeline on it before once more resuming his brisk walk.
 “And what the hell is the connection between these three victims? They lived in opposite neighbourhoods, worked in completely different areas and fields, never seemed to have been in the same place at the same time and yet somehow they were killed by the same hand. Also, where did all that money come from?” 
His phone chooses precisely that moment to start ringing and the sound of ‘Horns’ by Bryce Fox cuts through the tension. 
“It’s Liliver,” he mouths as he swipes upwards to answer and puts the medical examiner on speaker phone.
“You got something for us Lil?’
“You bet I do. I had scraps from the victims’ clothings tested to try and find a common link. What I found were traces of bleach, acetone, sodium chloride and ammonia.”
“Drugs. They were making drugs. That would explain all the money.” Jude is burning and luminescent with victory, until Lili’s next words cut her down.
“It’s not drugs.”
“How can you tell?”
“Because of what isn’t there. If your vics were making drugs, there’d need to be a couple more ingredients. That being said, they were definitely up to something.”
She lets out a sigh of defeat. “Thanks, Lil.”
Cardan hangs up before bringing his fingers up to his temples, massaging the sides of his head as he burns a hole into the board in front of him.
Jude bites back a scream. “This is like the start of a bad joke, a teacher, a sculptor and a vending machine operator walk into a tattoo parlour…”
He scoffs, “Yeah, except we don’t really have a punchline.”
“Other than ‘they made a bunch of money and got themselves killed.’”
There’s a lull in the air and the frustration is palpable. There was so much more than just their bet at stake here, there was the need for justice for these three victims, who regardless of their crimes likely didn’t deserve what had befallen them. Besides, there was no way that they could let a ruthless killer roam the streets freely.
Suddenly, Cardan whirls around to face her, once again bringing his pacing to an abrupt stop, with a speed to rival that of the animal that was his tattoo inspiration.
“Made a bunch of money,” he repeats. 
He sounds like he’s just jumped off of the precipice. She, on the other hand, remained firmly mounted to the ground. 
“What?”
“A sculptor who works with metal, a chemist and a vending machine operator...I know what they were up to.”
Slowly, the light starts to dawn on her and her pulse speeds up. Yes, she thinks.
“Think about it, when counterfeiting money, what’s the biggest problem you face? Finding the paper,” he continues.
“And a vending machine operator would have an endless supply of one dollar billls!”
“Exactly, then the chemist would come in, using the chemicals that were found on the vic’s bodies to white wash those bills.”
“And then the sculptor would be able to fashion a set of metal plates with which to type in fake serial numbers’ so they can get larger denominations of money…”
“Right! So, plates, paper, there’s just one missing ingredient.”
Beaming smiles break out on both their faces when, in unison they reach the same conclusion. 
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The 12th Precinct’s interrogation room had contained many suspects from the time it was built. Some were innocent and some were guilty, but there was no doubt in both Jude and Cardan’s minds that the feline woman currently seated across from them with her legs up on the table was one hundred percent guilty. 
“So you think you’ve figured it all out, huh?” Vivi’s drawl is deceptively flippant.
“I think so.” Jude answers calmly. “For instance, we’ve figured out that you were involved in and likely the mastermind behind a counterfeiting operation that raked in a substantial amount of money. You provided the last ingredient needed, the ink from your tattoo parlour stocks that was used to print on the bills.”
Cardan leans forward. “We’ve also surmised that you killed your partners in said operation; Taryn Santorini and Chloe Tatterfell, both of whom you met through your tattoo parlour, just like you said.”
“And our third victim, Locke McCutchins? Yeah, we know he was your cousin, once removed on your mother’s side wasn’t it? A distant enough relationship for you to not be flagged when checking his family, but close enough for you to enlist him in your scheme so you had access to vending machine bills.” Jude continues, she and Cardan having perfected the art of interrogating together ages ago, their tactics working smoothly together alongside each other. 
Vivienne sneers. “So what? You have no proof.”
“On the contrary, ma’am, we do. You neglected to hide the metal plates that you got Taryn to make for you in a place that wasn’t under a loose floorboard of your room, easily found with the aid of a search warrant.” Cardan smiles.
“You also tripped up when you stored your used gun with matching ballistics to the weapon that killed our victims in the same place as the plates.” Cardan’s smile is copied on Jude’s face.
Vivi’s skin pales and her cat’s eyes narrow into slits as she bangs the table, hard, before slouching back in the metal chair, the fight leaving her.
“Well, I suppose the jig is up, as they say,” she drawls.
Satisfied, Jude stands up and gathers the notepad and pen that she’d left on the desk and then bends over the interrogation table to meet Vivi’s gaze.
“What I can’t understand, though, is why? Why would you kill them if you’d already paid them?”
The Accused smirks. “It was all that idiot Lockes’s fault. He’d gotten himself into debt with some mob shark and needed more dough to bail his sorry self out. I wasn’t about to give it, he had his cut and that was all. But then, he threatened to go to the cops and tell them about what we did. Couldn’t let that happen, so I figured I’d kill ‘em all of. Just to be safe.”
The casual way in which she speaks of her deeds chills Jude to the bone. Wordlessly, she turns her back on yet another cold hearted murderer and exits the room with Cardan right behind her.
They come to a stop in front of the now empty murderboard, its surface shiny and white, devoid of words, but not for long. There was always a murder happening somewhere or the other, Jude had been a detective long enough to know that.
“So, now that Vivienne Insmire, tattoo artist, mastermind and ink supplier of counterfeiting operations and killer of ‘friends’ and distant male cousins is safely behind bars, I think you and I have a certain matter to settle, Duarte.”
She’d been trying hard to avoid this moment all day, pushing back thoughts of her close defeat and what its consequences would be. It seemed like now, she'd run out of time. She gulps.
“I suppose-” she almost can’t bring herself to say the words, “I suppose you won our bet, then.”
“Yup.” He’s not even trying to hide his gloating, “and you know what that means.”
The noise she emits is one that is resigned. She knows what’s coming.
“I’ll pick you up at eight tomorrow.”
“Or I could just take a ca-”
“Don’t be late, Duarte,” he calls over his shoulder as he leisurely strolls towards the precinct exit, slinging his leather jacket over his shoulder.
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If you’ve made it all the way down here, congrats! Here’s a link for part 2.
Tagging the lovely people on my short but treasured TFOTA taglist; @cupcakesandkittens​ (who helped immensely during the writing of this fic and who suggested adding in the interrogation scene❤) and my very own talented Secret Snusband, @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln​
Please let me know if you’d like to be added to or taken off of my taglist💕
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If You Love Someone, Let Them Go: Part 8
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Summary: Since starting with SVU, Sonny hadn’t kept much terribly close to the chest. The squad knew about his family, growing up on Staten Island, the classes at Fordam. What was hidden was why he didn’t date. Sonny Carisi was also separated from his childhood sweetheart, a separation neither ever took to divorce. They had the same haunts. They’d grown up neighbors. Their paths crossed every few months, and divorce talks would turn into reminiscing would turn into a night spent together, sometimes sex sometimes just talking until the early morning. It always ended with one of them waking up alone however. How will that change when the squad finds out?
Pairings: Sonny Carisi x Original Character
1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7
A/N: I really wanted to write Sonny and conflict with his family in Transgender Bridge so this chapter includes transphobia via his mom and then talk about past homo- and transphobia in Sonny. I think Sonny’s acceptance of things is really interesting, especially given he seems like he’s from a traditional/conservative family. 
June  2015
“Hey, doll. Can we wait and do dinner? I know it’s an anniversary dinner, but this was a bad one.” She didn’t like how his voice sounded. He’d been keeping her in the loop, and there’d been a spirited, to say the least, discussion at the Carisi family dinner that Sunday. His mom had fought him regarding Avery, a transgender teenager, over the phone. The case had been everywhere it felt like, and the traditional Carisis felt that Avery wanted attention. Sonny, for his part, was confused, but between Amanda and Victoria’s reminders he didn’t know a single guy who would wear a dress for no reason, he’d come to realize it wasn’t a choice, just like being gay, straight, or bi.
It was hard for him sometimes. Despite the fact Victoria had always been open and accepting, a result of her mother’s influence and LGBT family members, Sonny was raised that all of it was wrong in the eyes of God. That said, as he grew, he saw how much harder it was for Victoria’s aunts. It started to dawn on him that he didn’t choose to want to be in his body or be attracted to women. Why would he assume someone woke up and chose something that didn’t make their lives easier? He also came to believe that God did make them exactly as they were, and human influence had bastardized the love everyone part of His message. When he stood up to his mother, Victoria was pleased to see the growth in him; usually, he’d have let it lie. 
“Of course it can wait. What happened?”
“She died,” he said, voice tight. “The boy that pushed her is being tried as an adult, but Tor, her parents don’t want it. He’s just a kid. He even drew her this comic apologizing. He got scared because she was different.”
She knew what he wasn’t saying. As good as Sonny was, as much as he’d grown, they’d both been easily influenced at one point. When they grew up, it was easy to get swept into easy homophobia and transphobia. Sonny had said things she knew he regretted as he learned more, and they both knew how easy it would’ve been for him to get swept up in the crowd at that age, trying to prove he was tough and manly and straight.
“How about I pick up the pizza ya like? We can stay in? I’ll tell ma I don’t feel good. I don’t think that visit is what you need right now.”
“Thank you.” They said their I love yous, and she quickly scheduled pick up for the pizza and tucked his favorite treats from the cooler into a box. When she got home, she straightened up the apartment and threw his favorite pajamas in the dryer so they’d be warm when he got home. One pizza and beer run later, Sonny came through the door, and he was visibly exhausted. She pressed a kiss to his cheek, taking his coat. 
“You pajamas are in the dryer.” He let out a grateful groan, changing into them before coming back and dropping onto the couch, arms out over the back. She sat beside him, handing him a beer and opting to sit in silence as he nursed it. Her Sonny was a big softy, but she also knew he’d talk about things when he was ready; that was a change she could rely on. He wrapped his arm around her, caging her against his chest as he laid back. His eyes were closed, but his brow was heavy and his mouth set in a frown. Carefully, she smoothed his hair, and he pressed into her hand. 
“Thank you,” he said, his voice barely audible. 
“Any time. Thank you for telling me what you needed.” He nodded, rubbing her back. 
“I saw a pink box.”
“It’s an assortment. I got all your favorites. And the pizzas.”
“I love you so fucking much.”
“I’ll call ma tomorrow to get us out of going there. It’s just you and me all weekend, okay?” 
He nodded gently, cheek pressed against her forehead. This case didn’t sit well, and in this moment he was deeply grateful not to be the ADA for this case. He understood logically where they were coming from, but he was also acutely aware of how little Avery’s parents agreed with trying Darius as an adult. Their daughter believed in forgiveness, and he was a kid. His colleagues liked to pretend they’d always been the cops they are now, but Sonny remembered being sheltered and ignorant. If Victoria hadn’t been there to tear him a new asshole when he was 13 and started using slurs he didn’t fully understand, he could have gotten swept up in this type of accident. Lord knew his mother didn’t think this case was anything but bad luck for the boy. She thought Avery had finally gotten the attention she wanted. That had set him off at dinner, and he swore Mia was proud of him, sitting by Victoria as he defended where this may have been coming from.
Sonny, God made him a him. He doesn’t make mistakes.
Or, ma, maybe all those things you like to call trials? Maybe transitioning and dealing with this kind of ignorance is a part of her trial. No teenage boy would wear a dress if it weren’t real. Avery is a girl, and if you can remember Aunt Rhonda’s new name every year when she gets married again, you can at least call Avery she.
I’m just saying, any of my grandkids pull that, we’ll be taking them somewhere. That’s attention seeking behavior, and needs to be taken care of.
If Victoria and I’s child ever comes out and you are anything but supportive, you will not be a part of their life.
You can’t do that. I’m your mother.
I don’t know ma. Making your own blood feel less than? Sounds like real attention seekin’ behavior to me. Needs to be taken care of.
He let Victoria guide him to the car afterwards, but he hadn’t cancelled the next family dinner. Knowing Avery had died? He couldn’t do it. Meeting her had taken a logical belief that trans people were the gender they identified as and made it more serious. He’d known his mother felt that way, but he’d never heard her articulate it like this. Before the separation and therapy, he’d have bottled up how wrong she was, tucked it away to keep the peace. Now? He couldn’t do it.
“Thank you, Tor. For all of this. And for calling her. I’m still so angry.”
“I know, Dom. I love you.”
“I love you too. And I meant what I told her. If our kid is gay or trans or something else that exists that I’m sure I don’t know about, I don’t care. They’re our baby and I’ll love them and I’ll take them to whatever store to get whatever they need or whatever doctor. I’ll beat the ever living shit out of anyone who makes them feel like they're wrong for how God made them.”
“You’re going to be an amazing father.”
“That should be the bare minimum though, shouldn’t it? Loving your kids no matter what?”
“It should. But that can be hard, you know? Like your mom. She exists in that really conservative vacuum. I’m proud of you for changing when you learn about things, not ignoring it and doubling down.”
“That means a lot, doll. People act like I’m supposed to have been born knowing. Our priest was open minded, and I met you. Otherwise, I may not have turned out like this. And that was scary to realize?”
“Bella, Theresa, and Gina all did it too. You’d all have grown.”
“What if our kid is gay or somethin?”
“We’ll love them. If your mom can’t handle it, we’ll keep them from her.”
“You mean it?”
“Yeah. we’ll get close to my family or something. Or have holidays with Amanda and Liv.”
“Good,” he murmured. “I wouldn’t want to, but I won’t subject them to their grandma actin’ like that. The world is so shitty. I want family to be supportive.”
“I know. We’ll be okay. And who knows? Maybe you snapping makes her reevaluate. I had to yell at you to make you start reevaluating things. We didn’t talk for awhile month. That’s years in thirteen year old time.”
“True,” he chuckled, rubbing her back. “One can only hope. You’d have liked Avery. Into photography and comics.”
“She sounds awful cool.”
“She was. And she was so kind. Like she was hurt, but the last thing she did was forgive him, Tor. Can you imagine? He drew her a comic, and she forgave him. Then she died.” He was facing the ceiling with his eyes closed as he talked. 
“Do you want me to be there?”
“Maybe come by at lunch?”
“I’ll be there, okay?”
“Thank you, Doll.”
“Thank you for sharing how you’re feeling.” 
@cycat4077 @fear-less-write-more
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mandoalorian · 4 years
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What the Pedro boys are like at college
This is my first time doing one of these so please be nice! Yep, TUWOMT isn’t out yet but I have read the script and I have written for Javi Gutierrez here. If you don’t want spoilers, maybe don’t read his scenario. I’ve made it so Javi’s is the last one so you can skip over it easily. I write for all the main Pedro characters! These include:
·         Din Djarin – The Mandalorian
·         Javier Pena – Narcos
·         Frankie Morales – Triple Frontier
·         Maxwell Lord – Wonder Woman 1984
·         Jack Daniels: Kingsman: The Golden Circle
·         Oberyn Martell: Game of Thrones
·         Dave York: The Equalizer 2
·         Pero Tovar – The Great Wall
·         Ezra Prospect – Prospect
·         Marcus Pike – The Mentalist
·         Max Phillips – Bloodsucking Bastards
·         Dio – NYPD Blue
·         Javi Gutierrez – The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent
·         I DO NOT WRITE FOR PEDRO PASCAL.
Please please request a ‘Pedro boy’ scenario HERE. You can also request for me to write a one shot HERE.
Masterlist
Enjoy!
 ***
Din Djarin: Does college exist in Star Wars? I’m not sure… but if we take a moment to imagine Din being schooled by the Mandalorian Creed. He learns the history of Mandalore, about the great leaders such as Satine Kryze. He learns the importance of ‘the way’ and studies the art of weaponary, learning how to use guns, detonators, vambrace, and whistling birds. He learns about the legacy of the darksaber and, as we already know, he trains with the Rising Phoenix. I imagine Din likes to keep himself to himself and has been a loner his whole life. He places his trust in his fellow Mandalorian’s but they are not his friends. They are simply just his allies. Being schooled in the Mandalorian Creed would be physically exhausting but it’s something Din can manage. After all, he doesn’t have a choice. This is the way.
Javier Pena: We know Javi always wanted to leave Texas, and I think college was the perfect time for him to venture out. He didn’t choose a school with a pristine academic reputation, but instead, he picked a school that had the best renowned night life so he could go out and enjoy drinking and partying. Javi wasn’t a complete wild card. He was the kid who seemed to be good at almost everything. He was able to graduate top of his class with honours in Criminal Law.
Frankie Morales: When Frankie was younger, he loved helping his dad work on the family car and he even scored a part-time job at a garage when he finished high school. At high school, he never really found interest in the core subjects like English, math, science, history… and so when it was time for college, he wanted to develop on his hobby. Frankie chose to major in engineering, with a minor in transportation and logistics. This was perfect for him. In his second year, he went from looking at cars and motorcycles, to different forms of aircraft. He remembers one morning, he sat in the pilot seat of a helicopter after the fuel compressor had went bust and he had never felt more at home. On a whim, he dropped out of college and was lucky enough to get a place in piloting school. Frankie stuck by Santiago throughout college, but while Santi went out and partied, Frankie would slump down in his chair, drink a few beers, and be ready to head back to his dorm at 9pm. He had a few flings in college but had no interest in pursuing an actual relationship. It was important to him that he used his time in college to discover what he really wanted to do with his life.
Maxwell Lord: He probably went to Cornell, or Harvard. Maxwell could’ve gotten in from his family name alone, and if he wasn’t the most academically bright, no doubt his mother would’ve paid him into college, but Maxwell had always been smart. He was home schooled his whole life and so college was a big change for him. He worked hard. He showed up to every class early, and handed in homework and dissertations early, and used his charm to schmooze with the teachers, doing all he could to make sure he got the best grades. Maxwell majored in Business and Economics, and minored in Marketing. He didn’t have much choice in what he studied in college because he had his life set out for him the moment he was born. Maxwell didn’t have friends, but that’s not to say he was a loner. Everyone on campus knew who Maxwell was, and everyone knew the kind of family he came from.
Jack Daniels: Despite Jack and his high school sweetheart going their separate ways for college, they couldn’t stay away from each other for long. He was a Political Science major but never really cared much for it. He had a lot of friends, was a care free spirit and attended parties. He is someone who has natural academic ability but his failure to attend class and do homework meant that he, inevitably, began to drag behind. Realising political science isn’t for him, he dropped out of college and moved in with his high school sweetheart. He much preferred it that way, and he was able to be with her all the time. Having his company meant that she was now distracted from her studies and when she fell pregnant with their first child, they decided to run away from college all together and start a family far away.
Oberyn Martell: Is there college in Game of Thrones? I’m not sure, but a modern! Oberyn would major in classical studies and minor in philosophy. He is a prince, after all. He excels in both subjects and picks up languages such as Latin and Greek easily. It comes natural to him. He passes with flying colours and never has to try too hard because the words of Aristotle and Plato were engrained into his brain ever since he was old enough to read a book. As prince, he knows it is important to graduate with honours and that it’s his priority but that doesn’t mean he can’t make time for fun. He doesn’t commit to any relationship during college but does embrace his sexuality. He’s kind, gentle, and respectful. He’s a really great lover, but an even better friend.
Dave York: Dave studied criminology and forensic science at college. He was able to learn the ins and outs of criminal psychology and the process that cops and forensic teams go through when trying to trace a murder. His knowledge in this subject sure helped him in later life. He passed with flying colours, but never wanted a career in crime – or at least, not a career you’d need a degree in. But his newly received qualification, Dave decided to join the CIA as an operative where he met Robert McCall. He played good guy for a long time, but his bad intentions linked to criminal activity traced all the way back to college. He met his wife in college, and truthfully, she was the only thing who kept him from spiralling into criminal activity at an earlier stage.
Pero Tovar: Again, I am almost certain college didn’t exist during this time period but if we make it a modern AU, I think Pero would have majored in geography and minored in cultural studies. He had a goal to travel the world and see all the magnificent places. Pero was a grumpy adolescent, and seemingly he never really grew out of it. He had a group of people he hung out with who were similar to him but he never really considered them friends. He didn’t partake in extracurricular activities and he would just focus on studying. But he did have a flare in art which was lost on him during later life. He used painting as an emotional outlet and a means to express his feelings.
Ezra Prospect: I guess this is a modern! Ezra then. He studies geology, and he’s really smart. He does a lot of reading, but he actually prefers non-fiction over fiction. His interest in geology goes past his degree, and he actually collects a variety of rocks and gemstones, going into deep research about them and believing that certain ones possess healing powers. Ezra has a partner throughout his time in college, and they spend a lot of time with each other. Ezra’s partner encourages Ezra’s love for geology and finds his passion endearing, even encouraging him to earn an income from his knowledge! You help Ezra use the rocks that he collects to create bath salts and make jewellery to sell on and earn profit.
Marcus Pike: Marcus was an art and design major, and all his teacher’s loved him. He was never the best at the practical side, but he excelled in art history and his knowledge on the subject was outstanding. Marcus had one long term relationship during college but his partner ended up breaking his heart. It took a long time for Marcus to recover, but he’d always been one for second chances. He’d hope that he’d never get his heart broken again.
Max Phillips: Max was a bit of a player in community college; a jock, who studied his undergraduate in Physical Education. When Evan had Max kicked out for sleeping with his girlfriend, Max went and studied Sales Management at a university just for Vampires. Filled with a feeling of wrath and hatred for Evan, Max made it his mission to ruin him. No more time could be spent partying in his fraternity, playing soccer for the college team and sleeping with the cheer leader’s – Max made it his goal to graduate from Vampire University with a top major and steal the job of leading Sales Manager from Evan. And that’s on holding grudges.
Dio: Yeah, Dio didn’t go to college. He dropped out of high school when he was fourteen. In his youth, his hobbies included making fire and stealing from the rich.
Javi Gutierrez: He’s a film major of course! He was born into a rich family, we know that, and comes from a very financially privileged background. His parents knew that he did not have to pursue a degree in something that would ensure him a job, because Javi would be well off no matter what, and so they were fine with Javi doing something he was truly interested in. Javi has loved literature, art and movies his whole life. He minors in screenplay writing and excels top of his class, constantly impressing those around him with his ability to memorise anything from one liner quotes to whole scenes from movies. He shares his extensive knowledge of trivia, and all his lecturer’s firmly believe that the film industry is something that Javi could one day potentially succeed in. However, Javi is awkward. He shy’s away from all the partying and spends Friday night’s in his dorm, munching on popcorn and watching classic movies. A relationship is never in question for Javi because of his family circumstances, so he just lays low and focuses on his studies. As soon as he graduates, he heads back home to Mexico and his dreams of being a famous Hollywood screenplay writer seem so distant.
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theliterarywolf · 4 years
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How was the sequel to Tales from The Hood, a shitshow?
The original Tales from the Hood, while having some campy horror elements, still managed to present its stories and tone competently while still incorporating themes of struggles of black Americans in urban areas. 
Examples: 
A black politician who’s been trying to fight against police corruption gets beaten to death and injected with drugs post-mortem by said corrupt cops to slander his name. The politician returns from the dead to exact vengeance. Obviously this short tackles police brutality and corruption.
A little boy and his mother who are constantly beaten and abused by what he draws and identifies as a ‘monster’ who, it turns out, is the mother’s new boyfriend. The theme here is Domestic Violence and how often people try to brush it under the rug as just a way of life in the community. 
A former klansman-turned senator buys a building called ‘The Dollhouse’ that is of high historical significance to the local black community, despite their wishes and complaints, to serve as the headquarters for his racist campaign to become governor. The house in of itself was where a confederate-supporter, after the loss of the Civil War, decided to murder all of his slaves rather than see them freed. Their restless souls haunted the place until a ‘voodoo woman’ managed to calm their souls and place them into dolls. You can pretty much guess where this is going and the themes.
The final entry centers around a gang-member who, after getting hunted and shot down by rival gang-members, is taken into police custody and is given one last chance for freedom by a doctor’s new, radical behavioral therapy program. Said therapy takes a note right out of A Clockwork Orange and bombards our main character with alternating images of brutal gang-violence and KKK lynchings. After which, he is berated with apparitions of all the people he’s shot and killed; including a little girl who was a victim during one of his drive-by shootings. Of course, this kind of therapy will only be successful if the subject shows some remorse...
And all of this is wrapped in a framing device of three gang-members trying to find some drugs at a funeral-home, even harassing the funeral-director, which turns out to be a portal into hell.
... *deep breath*
I have to do a ‘Read More’ because this post got long. But I implore you guys to read on to see the abyss of insanity and bad directions that were taken in regards to the sequel of this movie. Please.
The sequel decided to throw ALL NUANCE AND TACT out of the window and give us such wonderful stories as: 
A white girl and a black girl are on a road-trip and decide to go to the... ugh... Museum of Negrosity where the owner chastises them on thinking that the uncomfortable racist memorabilia he owns (collections of minstrel show cartoons, golliwog and pickaninny dolls) are things of the past instead of acknowledging them as parts of America’s racist past. And, for some reason, the white girl is obsessed with buying one of the golliwog dolls because she had one when she was little. Anyway, they sneak back in later with the white girl’s brother who happens to be the black girl’s boyfriend, so they can steal one of the dolls. Through hijinks, the doll comes to life and grows to the size of a human being. The brother/boyfriend gets whipped to death, the black girl gets cut in half by a minstrel-colored guillotine, and the white girl... Fucks the giant golliwog doll, gets pregnant, and a few days later, has her stomach torn open as a bunch of baby versions of the doll go flying out everywhere.
Some gang-members track down a former pimp who’s changed his ways to try and shake him down for some owed money. He doesn’t comply, so they kill him but, golly-gee! How are they going to get the money now~? Oh, I know! Hold a scam medium hostage so he can perform a seance to talk to the pimp to find out about the money. But, oh no~ It looks like the medium’s powers decide to actually work this time~ Ooh~
Two douchebags hookup with two hot chicks and, after the world’s worst game of Cards Against Humanity, they decide to roofie the girls so they can record themselves raping them so they can post it to ‘le dark web’. ... Lo’ and behold, the girls turn out to be vampires who were playing 4D chess to rope the two douchebags in so they can use them for their own recording-something-brutal-to-post-online scheme. 
And... The LAST one. Oh my God, the LAST ONE. *deep breath* Okay.
So we follow a black republican councilman who is married to a white woman and they’re expecting a baby after a long line of miscarriages. But the wife is having weird bouts of bad dreams and insomnia. What are the bad dreams about? 
... I need you guys to understand. That I am not shitposting when I type the following words. *deep breath* Okay. 
The wife is being haunted by the ghost of Emmett Till telling her that she doesn’t deserve to have her baby. You know? Emmett Till? The victim of one of the most brutal, horrific murders in America due to one of the most disgusting, vile acts of racism? THAT EMMETT TILL?!
So..! The black councilman is working for a white politician who... I’m just going to put a direct quote from the movie so you can get where they were coming from.
“That man wants to close down ten more voting locations, all of them in black districts!”
Anyway, after a house-call from a doctor who brushes off the dreams as hormones, the councilman hosts a party for the politician who’s running slogan is ‘Let’s take Mississippi back!’ Gee-golly-willickers! Can’t imagine where they were coming from with that one!!
So the party goes on, the politician even congratulating our councilman on his ‘white wife’, but said wife rushes downstairs after having another dream; ranting about ‘that boy from the field has decided to LIVE! And if he lives, our baby’s going to die!’ And she runs outside with a machete to try and kill the ghost of Emmett Till (who, again, very real person and victim of racist brutality). 
So the councilman’s mother and the local voodoo expert drive up and the voodoo expert tells the councilman that Emmett Till is trying to talk to him about the nature of sacrifice. The next day, the wife is talking about how her stomach is getting smaller, but the councilman doesn’t want to hear any of it and calls the doctor again. And, guys..?! If shit hadn’t jumped the rails before?! The train just starts doing cartwheels from here. 
The doctor is suspiciously short-tempered with the politician this time around and he does examine the wife to confirm that her stomach is indeed shrinking. However, when he’s told that the councilman is the father, he storms out and snaps “I don’t work for coloreds!” 
Then the wife runs out of bed and tells the doctor that the councilman isn’t her husband and that he kidnapped and raped her. So both the wife and the doctor drive off and the councilman realizes that the world has somehow gone back to the era of Jim Crow. 
... Oooh my gosh, typing this is making me want to commit toaster-bath but it gets so much worse..!
So, after the voodoo expert comes to chastise the councilman about not ‘respecting the sacrifices that have been gifted to you’, he is able to see the ghost of Emmett Till (who was a real person, why is this happening..?!) who is there to tell him that he’s decided that he wants to live. Which means that the world will never see the brutal images of his body at his funeral and that will cause a Butterfly Effect in history that will make it so that the Civil Rights Movement never happened. 
You may be questioning the logistics of this, but don’t worry! The ghosts of the girls killed in the 1963 16th Street Baptist Church Bombing in Birmingham come to explain and further berate the councilman about ‘respecting the sacrifices that have been gifted to him’ and working for a racist politician. 
But wait! There’s more! *whines* I keep crying out to God but he won’t answer...
They’re soon joined by the ghosts of the three Freedom Riders who were killed during the Mississippi Burning Murders, the ghost of Civil Rights Activist Medgar Evers, and DR. MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. 
Not to mention several other unnamed figures who walk up while everyone else starts chanting about ‘respecting the sacrifices that have been gifted to you’, who look like Rosa Parks and Frederick Douglass, just to name a few. 
... I need a drink. I need a cold, stiff drink. ... Almost done. 
So, in comes the Klan. You know, the white-robed bastards; I hear they have an outreach center a few cities away from me. Sure, fine, whatever. The wife is leading them along with the white politician who hits the councilman’s mother in the face with a baton and Emmett Till stops time just as reinforcements show up to tell the councilman that, in order for everything to go back to normal, he has to join the ranks of those who sacrificed. 
“If what you want is worth us dying for, how come its not worth you dying for?!”
And, at first, the councilman disagrees; even being dragged away by Klansmen. However! It’s his wife angrily spitting in his face that makes him realize that this world isn’t the world he wants to live in. So he runs over to Emmett Till to tell him that he will join him... And then he’s beaten to death, becoming a sacrifice to get the world back to normal. And, once it is, his spirit joins Emmett Till’s and walks off into the great beyond. 
So! Not only did this schlocky, B-movie horror movie sequel decide to use a REAL LIFE VICTIM of racism-driven brutality as a story-device, but it also wants to put forth the message that the people who lost their lives during the Civil Rights Movement? Yeah, they HAD to die! Otherwise the Civil Rights Movement would never have happened~!
You see why I hate the sequel to Tales from the Hood so much? Not even mentioning the terrible framing segments of a racial-profiling robot being told these stories so it knows what ‘criminals’ to go after, but this movie is just a temple of ‘WHY?! WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS?!?!?!’
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wrathfulmercy · 3 years
Text
Plotted starter for @emeryfleming
It was not the first time Rick was crossing the girls path in the night they investigated for a murderer lurking around the prostitutes. He had seen the blonde one around that asshole Clifton, one of those lawyers who appeared sleek on the outside, but definitely smelled like a walking daddy issue. Since Rick was one of the leading investigators in all kinds of purest evil, it wasn’t the first time that he was facing victims or their lawyers in court, but with the time he was struggling more and more to keep his emotional distance to these cases. Especially when he ran into them on the streets to see them in their worst shape.
While Lori was alive it was easier to focus his urge to protect and help on his wife, especially after he found out about her affair with the asshole Shane Walsh which just triggered his protectiveness even more. But then his whole life changed within one night and everything that could have distracted him from being too involved, suddenly fell apart.
He wasn’t able to distance himself from cases anymore. Not able to fight or judge criminals when he was the one who committed a murder himself and even if he somehow switched the sides of the law by killing someone out of revenge, his morals weighed still too heavy on his shoulders that he just couldn’t stay in his former position anymore.
After quitting the job at the police and taking over Shane’s former position as a leader of his “saviors” group, he tried to move away from the petty crimes which focused on quick money and rather set their motivation on revenge, especially when it came to protecting children and women. Finally he didn’t have to think about stupid paperwork anymore or about rules which were set in stone and often forced him to release people without having enough proofs. Finally it was him to decide who was guilty and who wasn’t and even if he didn’t plan on running into the blonde girl again after seeing her last at the crime scene months ago, she suddenly stepped into the coffee place where he sat with his capos after finishing their last meeting.
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The sun had already set, but the lightbulbs hanging above the counter shined perfectly in her face as she leaned over, despite her desperate try of hiding under a hood. A grin crossed Ricks lips and he lifted his hand to make his helpers shut up. “Bring her to my place. She’s from fucking Clif.” Yeah, he remembered the case pretty well from back then and how anxious she looked around him. She still had those same empty eyes, telling you wordlessly everything about her torture even if she tried to seem tough on the outside. She was obviously in a rush, her head always looking back over her shoulder so Rick had to be quick before she was gone again. “I’ll wait at home.” he mumbled and placed a one hundred dollar note on the table to pay and then left the place to sit down in the back of his black Mercedes waiting with his chauffeur.
Things like these weren’t Ricks part of the game, he actually considered himself more as the mastermind leading the group instead of getting his hands dirty himself and he preferred to be not recognized or connected to their group since he was still too well known at the police. Of course he had some connections to his old station, cops are greedy bastards as well, but it wasn’t worth the risk and so Shane’s nickname “Diablo” just changed into “Blue” for Rick and people only saw his face when it got personal, but in this cases it was probably the first and last time they saw the blue shining.
That’s why Daryl and Abraham, the two highest capos of the group, did his dirty work and in this case it included bringing Emery to the big cellar of his own mansion. Her hands were tied up and her eyes blindfolded as Rick gestured at the ground to let the two men push her on her knees and released the fabric covering her eyes.
It was only a small light coming in from a window protected by bars at the top, but the blue eyes facing her should be still clear as ever as he started to speak. “Miss Fleming. I apologize for the hard treatment of my boys, they seem harsh sometimes but they purr as soon as I would tell them to, so there’s nothing to fear.” With a grin he hunkered down in front of her, his covered hand reaching out for her face to rest the strains of her hair behind her ear. “You might not remember me and I tell you that’s absolutely fine. But from now on you stand under my protection and that’s why I brought you here. My name shouldn’t matter in this case, you can call me Blue or boss or however you please. Just know that I mean no harm, you had enough of that already, didn’t you?” With his hands covered in black leather gloves he flipped and made Daryl lean down to reach out for her cuffed hands. “I can tell my friend D to open these, but only if you behave. Then we can have a dinner and you can ask all the questions you have. So... can I expect your compliance here, Miss Evergreen?”
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heathneycanon · 4 years
Text
okay so i ranked 113 total drama/ridonculous race ships based on how much i like them with explanations below the cut.. fair warning that i’m a lil mean to some of the ships lower on the list.
also i forgot to include dwayne senior and that one girl’s mom from rr because i literally forgot they existed until now, and i don’t want to manually add them in so i’ll just say that i think they’re cute but not super interesting.
EDIT: this has been updated post-roti-rewatch. i switched around the order of a couple ships, and added a new one. if i ever rewatch rr or pahkitew i’ll probably edit it again, but the likelihood of me rewatching either of those seasons any time soon is... ok i was about to say it was slim but it’s probably not
also i’m not ever adding in dwayne and the mom because i like it being a part f the description lmao. an afterthought. as it should be.
enjoy!
113. stephanie/ryan - i HATE the daters/haters. they’re like a weird, shitty mix of tda gidgette and duncney. like, they’re either annoyingly all over each other, or they’re toxic and fighting. tbh, they’re pretty toxic all the time. they stuck around for way too long imho.
112. jacques/josee - I CHANGED MY MIND IGNORE THIS
111. tom/jen - tom is canonically gay, and i hc jen as a lesbian. so i’m not a fan of this ship.
110. nemma - yeahh, knowing me, this is also a predictably low ranking. i hc noah as gay and emma as a lesbian, so again, i don’t vibe with this one.
109. coderra - i can only deal with this ship in rewrites. i’ve seen super well thought out rewrites of coderra and sierra’s character, but as it stands, i really don’t ship this at all.
108. davesky - dave is an incel lmao. anyway yea this ship initially seemed like bootleg zoke, which was kind of bootleg gwent, but then BOY did davesky get worse. i can’t stand dave and i can’t stand pairing him with sky, either.
107. leonard/sugar - why. i hate both of these characters. no thank u.
106. ella/dave - ok so u know i don’t like dave. i also hc ella as a lesbian, she hasn’t realized it and is dealing with comphet. i don’t like this ship.
105. topher/ella - i hc both of them as gay. they are friends tho.
104. macarthur/brody - in case you’re noticing a trend, i do in fact hc macarthur as a lesbian. i also don’t really care about her at all lmao. anyway, not a fan of this one. i really don’t understand why fresh thought this was a good idea.
103. noah/katie - again, i hc noah as gay, but this ship is more funny to me than anything else because these characters were shipped together so often early on, when they both a) barely had any characterization and b) had never interacted? anyway yea i don��t ship it.
102. cameron/sierra - this one’s weird? literally sierra had a crush on him or whatever because he reminded her of cody even though they’re… nothing alike? dude please get sierra some therapy oh my god
101. heather/justin - i knew someone who really, really shipped them once, which is why i’m including it. anyway i cannot see this ship at all, next.
100. amy/rodney - i guess this existed? i barely remember pahkitew, and i know rodney had a bunch of crushes, but this is the main one i remember so it’s the only one i can be bothered to include. anyway this relationship didn’t seem healthy at all.
99. max/scarlett - i don’t like max and i don’t really care about scarlett, but i also hc both of them as gay, so this is a no from me.
98. gwody - creepy and bad. i don’t trust people who ship this or davesky.
97. dashawn - shawn can do better. that one scene where they look at each other when dave has to kiss the person next to him is kinda funny tho.
96. topher/dave - marginally better than all other dave ships just because topher is there and i like topher. again tho, topher can do much better.
95. malejandro - why does this ship exist.
94. ezekiel/bridgette - not my thing at all. i don’t care about zeke too much, and i have a lot more ships with bridgette that i prefer over this one.
93. cody/beth - i only care about cody in certain contexts, and i practically never care about beth. i wouldn’t click off of a fic if this were a background pairing or whatever, but i definitely wouldn’t seek it out.
92. ezekiel/beth - again, don’t really care about beth or ezekiel that much. but in certain contexts, i can see why this would be cute.
91. courtney/jose - the only way this is cute is alongside aleheather, so that courtney and heather could marry into the same family. but also, why is this a ship that exists?
90. scourtney - i love both scott and courtney, but no thank u. they had absolutely no chemistry, and courtney was using scott both in the competition and as a rebound. not a fan.
89. gwen/cameron - is this a thing that exists? i found a screenshot of gwen kissing cameron on the cheek but is that edited? if it is real, i probably blocked it from my mind.
88. courtney/cameron - now i know this one exists in the weirdest, stupidest way the show could’ve gone about it. barely even qualifies as a ship, and it’s definitely not a good one.
87. duncan/zoey - i kind of see why others would like this one, but at the same time, it doesn’t really appeal to me.
86. alejandro/courtney - i love alejandro and i love courtney. but i can only see them as friends, tho i can see them like. kissing just because they’re bored. or to fuck with people. they did that in the show, right? kind of? i forget the specifics.
85. chris/blaineley - while i guess i can see why people ship this, chref is canon and blaineley is a lesbian.
84. katie and/or sadie/justin - why would katie or sadie date justin, when they’re in love?
83. gwuncan - maybe could’ve been good, but literally everything about how they got together and their relationship in canon has tainted my view of this ship. i definitely preferred them as friends in tda anyway. there’s a lotta cute gwuncan fanart out there so i do rb it sometimes tho. i see why people ship this, i get the potential, but for me it’s soured by world tour.
82. laurie/miles - who?
81. mary/ellody - yea ok they’re smart gfs, but also i literally don’t give a shit about either of them.
80. pete/gerry - they’re definitely dating but again i don’t care about them.
79. mike/cameron - not a horrible ship by any means, i just don’t really like cameron that much.
78. alejandro/justin - there are so many superior alejandro ships. and a handful of slightly better justin ships.
77. carrie/devin - wow they didn’t have a storyline that was original in any way! they’re pretty cute tho.
76. sanders/macarthur - would be higher but acab.
75. macarthur/josee - i really like the whole rivals to lovers thing, but again, acab. this is higher than sanders/macarthur because of the rivals to lovers, but mostly it’s because there’s only one bastard cop here rather than two.
74. owen/alejandro - i don’t really mind this one, but i see it as more of a one sided crush on owen’s side.
73. lightning/cameron - i don’t really care about cameron, but the jock/nerd dynamic is kinda good.
72. rockspud - they’re definitely a couple, but as the trend indicates, i really can’t bring myself to care too much about rr ships.
71. lindsay/beth - best beth ship, worst lindsay ship. i like one this better if lindsay is also dating tyler.
70. lindsay/lightning - a crackship i made up when i was eleven. i just think it’s really funny.
69. noco - not a bad ship, it’s just not my thing. i definitely see why other people ship it, i just ship both of them with other people.
68. ella/sugar - i see why people ship this as well, but i just really don’t like sugar. i can bring myself to see past that because this dynamic is genuinely good.
67. sierra/heather - i’ve seen this in au’s and rewrites of sierra’s character, and i see the potential. not bad.
66. bawn - they’re cute i guess? i just never really saw the appeal. they’re not bad by any means, it just seems kind of bland.
65. dakota/zoey - okay so i’m adding this one in as i’m reordering stuff because i rewatched roti. i didn’t have this here initially but their friendship was cute until zoey was all “she’s scary” and voted her off. just saying, if zoey wasn’t written as a hypocrite and was actually written as a COOL character that lived up to the potential of her concept, this would’ve slapped. also i love any combo of dawn, zoey, and dakota, because they’re cute. i’m not including poly ships on here because that’d make things wayy complicated, but i’d be here for a poly ship of these three.
64. scott/zoey - UPDATED. was originally “yea something about this rubs me the wrong way. i feel like if i rewatched roti i would remember what, but i’m not going to do that just for this list. maybe someday.” i ended up rewatching roti for unrelated reasons the next day, and honestly? this one is not that bad. could be cute, potentially.
63. dj/katie - i guess this one’s pretty cute? i don’t really remember them interacting, but i guess i can see why someone would like this.
62. dunhar - i see why people ship this one. i kind of like it? i feel like it would work really well in an au or a rewrite.
61. dott - UPDATED. was originally “i used to kind of like this ship, but now i really don’t. i do love the idea of dawn and scott as best friends who bully each other in the friendly kind of way, though.” but i rewatched roti and... this has potential. i kinda like it. still prefer the bullying friendship tho.
60. scott/mike - again, i see why people would ship it. i’m not sure if people actually do? but it seems like the sort of thing i might have shipped in middle school, so someone probably likes it. but meh, it’s not really my thing anymore.
59. topher/shawn - i don’t remember if these two interacted but i guess this could be cute? maybe?
58. sky/ella - yea it’s cute i guess? i don’t really have an opinion on this one beyond that.
57. dawn/dj - i mean… i get where this comes from. i fully understand. i personally see them becoming close friends, but i also see why people would ship them.
56. dawn/brick - again, i see them much more as friends, but i get why people would ship them.
55. geoff/gwen - this ship kinda interests me because it was originally going to be canon in camp tv, but because of that one gweoff friendship episode in island i see them as unlikely friends.
54. dj/bridgette - maybe you’re sensing a trend here, but i see them as friends. i could probably get on board with shipping them, though.
53. deather - i like them as friends more, but i do think a relationship between them could be fun.
52. ella/dawn - i feel like i’ve seen this ship? it’s not bad! i’m not the biggest fan of ella but this is pretty cute.
51. zoke - i really want to like them, and i wish they were written better. as is, i kind of ship them? there’s nothing wrong with zoke. but both as characters and as a ship, they could’ve been so much better.
50. noah/justin - this one’s interesting! i’ve never actively shipped it, but i can see it for sure. it’s cute!
49. owen/justin - again, not something i’ve actively shipped, but i like it!
48. carrie/kitty - i think they’re both in their late teens? like 18ish? appropriate ages for each other? if so, i like this one. they’d be cute
47. josee/jen - yea i like this. i feel like they would get along pretty well. they’re both successful in their own right. power couple for sure.
46. tom/jacques - again. power couple. i also think they’d go on double dates with jen and josee, which i like a lot. honestly both of these teams are the epitome of mlm/wlw solidarity. i like this one.
45. alecody - i like it! i don’t have much to say about them at all, but i like it.
44. brody/geoff - good ship! putting the romance in bromance. i like this one more when it’s combined with gidgette though.
43. anne maria/vito - originally i put “what is the appeal of this ship? genuinely asking.” as the description, and then an anon sent in this reply: “You wanted the appeal of anne maria and vito? Well here it is; they are both so dumb. Not a brain cell between the two of them. Imagine them trying to do anything domestic like. They could not assemble a bookshelf or make a pot of spaghetti without it turning into a horrible, but memorably fun, mess. They’re soft for eachother but would kick anyone’s ass for so much as looking at the other. Sorry im rambling lmao i just think they are so funny together”. i get the appeal now, so i’m moving this one up.
42. lindsay/courtney - lmao their dynamic is so funny. i don’t know how well a relationship between them would go, but i can see court realizing over time that lindsay is a lot smarter than she initially seems to be. idk courtney’s observant and lindsay is actually pretty smart. i can see it happening.
41. trent/justin - best justin ship, worst trent ship (that i can think of. i’m sure there are more trent ships but i can’t think of them lmao). i can see them getting along pretty well! i bet in universe a bunch of drama brothers fans ship them, because of course they do. i can see the potential here.
40. lindsay/heather - yea this one could be good. i’d like to see a post world tour version of this ship, or an island au where they get together. either way, i like the idea of this one.
39. lindsay/gwen - again, this ship is pretty good. gwen was kind of rude to lindsay at points, but i think after she stood up to heather, gwen gained some respect for her. idk i can see it happening.
38. lightning/scott - is this jock/farmer? jock/asshole? i’m not sure, but i really like it.
37. harzeke - tumblr user harzeke has opened my eyes. their posts are enlightening. the reason i kind of like ezekiel. harzeke is a good ship.
36. sadie/lindsay - remember in phobia factor when they were hyping each other up? yeah. they’d be cute together.
35. dundie - you know, i really didn’t expect them to make this one canon, but total drama dundie came outta nowhere. i wasn’t sure i was going to like them together, but fresh pulled together it’s first coherent plot in years and created a beautiful love story. very well done.
34. chref - chref is canon and u can’t tell me otherwise.
33. katie/sadie - after they got over their comphet, they realized they were in love and they end up having a really cute wedding.
32. ozzy - this ship is cute! they’re both bi and i hc they talk about cute people together because of course they do. also they would be so much fun to be around. i like them.
31. dj/geoff - djeoff? yea i like this. i think they’d both go out of their way to do sweet things for the other, but of course, they’re still geoff and dj. dj would probably bake a lot for geoff, but at least once, he’s gotten nervous and dropped it by accident. and geoff practices pick up lines and jokes before their dates but they’re like. the bad ones. dj loves them. anyway! this ship is good.
30. courtney/trent - i really, REALLY love them as friends, but i like them as a ship too! honestly i just love them getting along in any capacity. i think they’d be cute.
29. dawn/dakota - i made this up five minutes ago and i love it. i have no idea if people actually ship this but they should. just… think about it for a second. think about it and then try to tell me i’m wrong. u can’t.
28. alenoah - noah had a crush on alejandro during world tour, and u can quote me on this. i think they would be a power couple for sure. i like this one.
27. gidgette - season one gidgette is amazing. gidgette in the context of the killer bass five is amazing. season two and three gidgette is kind of meh to me, but not horrible i guess! i like geoff and bridgette and i think they’re cute together.
26. duncan/dj - i like the idea of this one. remember when duncan found dj a bunny? yea. they’d be cute.
25. jock - jock is good. rivals to allies to lovers. that’s the path i see this ship going down. i really like picturing them in any sort of au where they can kick ass together.
24. gwourtney - i used to like this one a lot more, but it’s still very good. i love the idea of them both mistakenly attributing their feelings for each other to duncan and accidentally ruining their friendship in the process. and by love i mean hate but also think is a good interpretation of the love triangle. i can see them together in an au, or after seriously reconciling in the future. or, honestly, in any universe where sundae muddy sundae doesn’t exist.
23. leshawna/gwen - did i hear u say best friends to lovers? no? well you’re getting them anyway. leshawna and gwen would be amazing i’m telling u. it’s a good ship.
22. tyler/alejandro - this is the third time i’ve said someone had a crush on alejandro during world tour, but. tyler had a crush on alejandro during world tour. i think they’d make a cute couple.
21. jashawn - this is a relationship built on respect and trust and i am here for that. they’re both a lil weird but neither of them mind, and they care about each other so much… i’m soft.
20. jasammy - i like this only marginally better than jashawn. honestly, i like all three dating the most. but anyway, jasmine was the first person who saw sammy as more than an extension of her sister… she stuck up for her. she was sammy’s first real friend. can i just reiterate… i’m soft.
19. evzy - they would light your house on fire together just cuz they were in the mood. eva bench presses izzy every morning. do not try to challenge them to any sort of competition, they will win by any means possible. eva picks izzy up at every opportunity. whenever they cook anything, they burn it. is this by accident or on purpose? i’m not sure. izzy likes lighting stuff on fire and eva likes eating burnt food for some reason, so it doesn’t really matter. i love their dynamic so much.
18. jomaria - if u were talking shit about either one of them, they would both get together and beat u up. they’re both legends and i love them.
17. gweather - total trauma comic has truly opened my eyes… i really like them in a future setting where they’re both more mature and can understand how they were both in the wrong at times during total drama, and ended up hurting people and were hurt themselves, and work through that together. so basically… in the setting of the total trauma comic.
16. heather/leshawna - rivals to lovers…. au where leshawna and heather get together during tda… i’m telling u it’s a good ship.
15. nowen - imho, this is both the best noah ship and the best owen ship. they complement each other so well. world tour nowen is just. the peak of their dynamic. i think enough has been said about nowen that you can understand why i would like it, so i’m just gonna move on.
14. trody - this one came outta NOWHERE a while back, i’m telling u. but i love it?? i liked their friendship in island, and i just. i love the idea of cody having a crush on both gwen and trent during island, misunderstanding that and thinking he just has a crush on gwen, and realizing after island at some point that he also liked trent. and then trent developing a crush on cody after the breakup with gwen and just… dijfalsfjla honestly i like them in so many contexts. thank u tumblr user gothcody for bringing the trody hype. anyway they’re a good ship!
13. bridgecourt - my favorite bridgette ship! idk i loved bridgette and courtney’s friendship in island, and i can see them having a best friends to lovers type of deal. i just think they’d be cute together, and their relationship would be really healthy and balanced.
12. gwoey - u can try and tell me there wasn’t a little something between these two in all stars, but u would be wrong. their designs compliment each other really well, they’re cute together… i’m a fan.
11. lesharold - SO valid. harold drinks his respect women juice every morning, except for that one time he rigged the votes in island to vote out courtney because he was mad at duncan smh. anyway this is a relationship built on RESPECT and CARE. they’re very cute together, and i love them.
10. dawn/zoey - the superior doey. listen the only reason these two weren’t friends is because fresh decided that zoey was going to think dawn was “weird”? but what if zoey just said that because she didn’t know how to deal with the fact that she found zoey cute… zoey is the epitome of that “i had a crush on a girl and i didn’t know how to deal with it so i sent her a letter that said ‘get out of my school’” tweet. n e way they would be such a good couple.
9. samkota - dafjlsflkaakf i think about samkota and i freak out i’m telling u. like is there anything. ANYTHING. better than a guy loving and respecting his girlfriend unconditionally? and mutual love and respect? … well i mean there are several more entries on this list, so okay, maybe a couple of things, but this shit is galaxy brain right here.
8. aleduncan - ok so apparently something i like slightly more than partners who are soft and even softer for each other is total assholes who care about each other. like alejandro is a gentleman… but he’s a manipulative jerk too. and duncan’s a fucking asshole and i love him for it. anyway when they teamed up in world tour, especially in that episode where they hunted ezekiel (??? what is total drama??) i really liked their dynamic.
7. lyler - ok back to love and respect. tyler and lindsay are so good!! tyler got so excited when lindsay remembered who he was right? and lindsay never stopped asking ppl if they were tyler ok. like she knew she cared about tyler enough to want to be with him even when she didn’t know who he was?? i feel like we don’t talk about the implications of this enough. honestly… i feel like people overlook how much the period in between tyler’s elimination and slap slap evolution must have sucked for both of them? like it was played for laughs but… that shit’s sad :( ok i’m done being sad they’re cute and they love each other and i love them.
6. gwent - yea u got me i still care about them. tdi gwent was really sweet! there was a lil pining. a lil outside meddling. and a lot of cute. and GOD during the finale when trent ran alongside gwen with that boulder? he cared about her so much!! of course action ruined it with the shitty portrayal of ocd and a healthy portion of not fucking communicating with your partner, but before that it was good.
5. truncan - you got me, i like the idea of trent serenading duncan with his guitar and duncan liking it a lot more than he anticipated. i think they’d have a dynamic that’s a little more turbulent than most other trent ships, but less so than most other duncan ships. they’d be a lot more balanced i think. i’m a fan of that.
4. scuncan - okay so u remember how i said i like to ship two fucking assholes together? scuncan is peak asshole/asshole rights. all stars totally missed their chance to have these two team up by dumbing scott down, whatever they did with duncan, and of course, introducing scourtney, i’m just saying. scott was actually playing the game pretty well in roti, and duncan was a veteran of the series. the two of them could’ve dominated the game. those fuckin assholes.
3. aleheather - okay now this ship was like, the only central ship that started out good and ended good in this entire series, except maybe jashawn but they don’t count because they were literally only in 13 episodes. anyway they did rivals to lovers right here. also, they simultaneously gave heather a great character arc and wrote alejandro super well. so the characters as individuals were great at the time they got together, and the couple was great together, so what i’m trying to say is… aleheather was and still is amazing.
2. duncney - in case u couldn’t tell from how high gwent is on this list, i am a fan of the tdi ships. another thing you might be able to tell from this list- duncan and courtney are two of my favorite characters in the series. so of course duncney gets a high placement on this list. not only that, but they go from disliking each other to really liking each other, which is something else that i really like. tdi duncney is opposites attract in the best way, where they compliment each other each other instead of clash. beyond that… ugh. eughhh. i don’t even want to think about that. but duncney in tdi alone earns itself number two on the list.
1. heathney - yes i love girls. yes this ship is pretty fucking basic. and no, there are no heathney fics on ao3. i will be attempting to remedy that. anyway, i could see them pulling a rivals to friends to lovers as well, which is one of my absolute favorite tropes. i think they’d be a total power couple. and to top it off, i love them both. a lot. so much. thank u for ur time.
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ladyfl4me · 4 years
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Hi please yell about boyd and stern in TCOS and TMWCIFTC :D!
Anon, THANK YOU for enabling me, you have my fucking life in your hands
I’ll preface all of this by saying that everything in this post is related to my long-form Amnesty works, The Moth who Came In from the Cold and The Children of Sylvain. If you haven’t read those, then you’ll be pretty damn confused, so I guess now is as good of a time to plug them - and the series - as any. A heads up: I started it back in 2018, and everything in TCOS is just… very VERY loosely associated with Amnesty canon at this point. Same root premise, same characters, but back in 2018 even I couldn’t predict where arcs 4 and 5 ended up going. TMWCIFTC was written as the logical progression, in my head, of an alternate arc 4, and everything that happened in TCOS is based off of that progression. It’s got almost no connection to the actual canon at this point. I’ll be recapping some of the more important plot points for context, though.
Here’s hoping the read-more works. This was 7 pages long in the google doc I prepared this in, so I apologize in advance to everyone on my dash if this got fucked up. Spoilers for TMWCIFTC ahead, as well as general vague spoilers for Amnesty.
So everything’s coming up roses. Fantastic. Let’s start with the biggest thing: how the characters of Agent Stern and Boyd Mosche have changed from canon to this AU.
Boyd’s Changes:
We’ll start with Boyd, because this motherfucker is UNRECOGNIZABLE from canon. On god, that is all Griffin’s fault. Pretty much all of Boyd’s character was concentrated in arc 4 of Amnesty, and honestly? He was a fantastic character there. Loved him as a counterpart to Ned. He gave off an air of “the ends justify the means” in almost everything he did - especially how he was willing to do anything, including blackmail Ned to hell and back, to get back to England - which I’ve grafted into my version of him. The angst-loving part of my brain seized on the tragic possibilities of his relationship with Ned and was bumping “No Children” by the Mountain Goats every time they interacted. Great stuff, interesting complexity, was genuinely surprised when he kicked it.
All that happened after I introduced him as a character in TMWCIFTC. My version of him retains the smooth-talking Britishness of him, with the aforementioned “ends justify the means” logic for everything; I’d probably sort him as a chaotic neutral, with basically all of his points in wisdom, charisma and strength with very few in intelligence. I tried to work with that for the start. We knew nothing about Boyd at the time I was writing TMWCIFTC, so my brain wanted to fill in that blank for jokes and giggles and haha funny’s and was like, “Yo what if Boyd was a Sylph this entire time? Wouldn’t that be fucking hilarious?” 
And that’s what I did. What happened to make this version of Boyd was a bit of a random “perfect storm” of influences and choices, which really only got sharpened because of my one-shot The Devil Went Down To Georgia. That one’s the main source of all Boyd lore, even though I barely reference it these days because he’s gone so far off the rails it’s a miracle I can keep him straight. 
I’ve talked about The Devil Went Down To Georgia a lot in relation to Boyd on here. TL;DR, I decided to make him two things: a violinist and a Sylph/cryptid, specifically the Jersey Devil. Yes, he is still British. I chalk it up lore-wise to a few things: the original Jersey Devil is more of a distant relative, Boyd crossed over from Sylvain and ended up in Britain sometime after that, and just willingly chose to keep up the British persona Bastard. I don’t think about it too much. He’s been a criminal from the very beginning; he’d been in prison on Sylvain, went through some shit there that made him steal a crystal and book it, and he continued to do crime on Earth to survive.
The violin thing is mostly me desperately wanting a character to have that background, because I played for seven goddamn years and want to put that knowledge and catharsis somewhere. Boyd probably either picked up a Sylvan instrument that was similar, or learned it in the early 20th century when he came to Earth, and just held onto it. He held onto the skills and got good - good enough that he could have gone professional, and tried in 2007, but that didn’t go super well, as anyone who’s read TMWCIFTC can attest. 
In terms of the type of cryptid he is, I’ve made the Jersey Devils a subspecies on Sylvain that takes cervids (deer, moose, etc.) or bovines (goats, antelopes, cows, etc.), as well as canines/felines of any shape and size, puts them into a gashapon machine with pterodactyl-style wings, awful teeth, and a snake’s tail, and calls it a day. You can get a tiny Jersey Devil that’s a combo of a tiny cat and a dik-dik; you can get a jacked nine-foot-tall terrifying amalgam of a lion and a moose, with a fucked-up mouth of multiple rows of teeth and huge claws.
That last one is Boyd. Don’t call me a monsterfucker for this, I have no defense.
So where does that leave him in relation to the Lodge? Back in 2018, before I started developing the lore that factors into TCOS about Sylph communities outside the Lodge (namely the Manhattan Sylphs that Leo worked with when he was a Chosen One), I figured that it’d be funny if every single cryptid kinda just… knew each other, or hung out near the Lodge. As you know if you’ve read TMWCIFTC, he got into some trouble in 1967, which Barclay, Indrid and Mama “bailed him out of.”
Once they found out he was a fellow Sylvan, though, it became less about “report this guy to the authorities” and more about “we have to make sure we keep an eye on this guy so he doesn’t get himself, or other Sylphs, in trouble” thing. He basically became Mama’s mostly-socialized half-feral cat, slinking through the halls of Amnesty Lodge, eating random food, falling asleep wherever, sitting in rooms where people are doing interesting things and just watching them. And everyone... kind of likes him. Sure, he doesn’t have a sleep schedule, and they have to get soundproof panels installed in his room at the Lodge because he’ll stress-practice violin at 3 in the morning, and he keeps shoplifting stuff from local stores to give to people like a cat bringing back dead mice. But he’s a good man. And he’s getting better every day.
Then he got got by the Ashminder in ‘98. He bolted, completely forgot everything about the Lodge but had the address of a former Lodge resident on his body after his memory was wiped, found a still-alive but memory-wiped fellow Lodge dweller, and fled to that address. Boyd lived there for years, trying to clean up his act and try to anchor himself a bit. Then in 2007, something on his path went wrong, and the stress break he went through after that made him run from that place. That’s when he met Ned, and they had a few years together before Boyd ended up in jail.
Then, once they killed the Ashminder and the memories it had eaten came back, Voidfish-style, Boyd remembered everything: the people who’d taken care of him, the friends he’d made, the love he’d found, the time and effort he’d put into getting better, the rewards he’d reaped because of it. He remembered fighting monsters and defending them. He got hit with it all at once, and missed them. His parole date was coming up; he could bide his time until he was released, and run down there.
But then, at the start of TCOS, Something Happens that makes all Sylvan disguises and spells shit the fucking bed; his disguise spell, which has been hiding a nine foot-tall jacked demon out of hell, flickers, and the invisibility spell that had been put on his disguise item to hide it failed. Boyd knew he was fucked if the jail folks found out he was a Sylph, so he decided to fucking Kool-aid Man out of there, becoming a wanted man in the entire state of West Virginia and getting a bit roughed up in the process.
But hey. Whatever it takes to get home, right? 
Stern’s Changes:
Stern’s changed too, though, and here’s how. It was relatively simple to tweak him, because so much of him was a blank slate to begin with. First: that name. Garfield Kent Stern is his full name: Garfield for the cat/Deals Warlock, Kent after Kent Mansley, the irritating dipshit FBI agent antagonist from the classic animated movie The Iron Giant. Poor bastard. He started as a walking meme who I was going to kill off; I came up with that name long before we got his real name in canon, and didn’t want to retcon it out. 
I’m a sucker for secret connections and familial ties, too, and back in 2018 the headcanon gashapon gave me “what if Stern was a cousin of Duck’s, but there was family drama that made their parts of the family split when they were kids, so now 30 years later they don’t remember each other?” 
And that’s exactly what I did. Gary is Duck’s first cousin on Duck’s mom’s side; their mothers are sisters. Gary’s uncle Arnie was a Secret Service agent who tangled with an Indrid trying to stop the Kennedy Assassination once, and he keeps telling that story at Christmas, much to everyone’s chagrin. Gary remembered those stories, and even received Indrid’s old disguise glasses - knocked off his face during his uncle Arnie’s chase - and carried them with him for a long time.
He didn’t start off as a baby cop, though; he was more interested in hitting the books, finding out the logic and doing the research to figure things out. I have him become a history major, getting a PhD with a few bits and bobs here and there that I haven’t worked out yet. Whatever the case, he spent a LONG time in academia, from undergrad starting in 1996 to graduation in about 2005. 
Things weren’t as peachy as he thought they’d be, though. Gary wrote and published his thesis, like a good little PhD candidate, but someone was watching him. In his thesis, he’d been trying to cobble together various cryptid-related legends across the word and making connections between them, among other things. He’d managed to link up and explain something that Unexplained Phenomena had been trying to figure out themselves. They immediately intercepted his thesis, kept it from being disseminated anywhere else, erased all copies of it after graduation, and reached out to Gary independently to bring him on.
Make no mistake: he went willingly. Despite the whole thesis coverup, Agent Gary Stern wasn’t coerced into being a government stooge, and he wasn’t blackmailed - he was given an offer to work with the cryptid cops, and he enthusiastically took it. Government benefits were decent, he’d heard; post-grad options were looking slim, especially going into the recession. In his mind, there was a bit of allure to it all, too. A secret government organization looking into suspicious and possibly supernatural things all over the nation? Fantastic. More opportunities to do research. He was in. Gary accepted their offer and started basic FBI training in 2007 - the same year Boyd had that mental break and went AWOL, returning to his life of crime and meeting Ned.
Biggest mistake he’d ever made. But then again, if he didn’t take them up on that, he wouldn’t be here, would he?
So he joins UP, goes up the ranks. They had him researching and charting the Bigfoot case for a while, and he was the only one who was willing to work on it at all because… well, Bigfoot sightings weren’t as sophisticated as some of the other projects that were out there for UP. (See: Area 51. We don’t talk about Area 51. Nobody talks about Area 51. Definitely nothing shady and unethical going on in there, no experiments on anyone or anything, no sir.) 
Gary’s diligent, though, and doesn’t like to back down from a challenge. That’s all hunting Bigfoot was: a challenge. No personal stake, no empathy. It was a job to get done, even though an entire person’s life was at stake.
And he got so caught up in this challenge that, when he went to Kepler, he EASILY got attacked by the Ashminder and destroyed within an inch of his life. He got the very memory of his job and intent in Kepler torn out of his head; once the Ashminder died, and those memories came back, they didn’t feel like his anymore, or like they’d been part of his life plan to begin with. Overcome with confusion and guilt, he decided to clean up his act and try to work against the FBI, with Mama’s blessing. 
His goal? Quit the FBI, get them off the Lodge’s back, and then see what happens next. Maybe he’d go back to academia, or teach, or something - just get as far away from the FBI as possible, as far away as he can be from hurting people. But he’s got to bide his time, because if he bolts now, they’re going to get suspicious and put the Lodge in even more danger. And that’s where he is now.
So why have they changed?
Simple answer? I don’t want to rewrite them to fit with canon. I just don’t. I don’t want to make Boyd human; I don’t want to change Gary’s name to Joseph and make him a Bigfoot groupie. I don’t want to rewrite hundreds of thousands of words of work to fit last-minute decisions made in the end times of Amnesty’s canon. My fic has diverged so much from canon that the canon versions of the characters don’t belong here anymore. Besides, Stern was such a background character in arcs 3 and 4 that he barely mattered, making his reappearance in arc 5 a bit of a clumsy follow-through, and Boyd was a one-act wonder. A little expansion couldn’t hurt. Making Gary something other than a direct antagonist made the narrative load a little easier, too, at least on my end. I hate giving a cop screen time, but it’s easier to justify his existence by rewriting his backstory and making him slog through the hell of a redemption arc. He’s had that coming. 
This leads us to TCOS, though, where the arcs of our player characters turn a bit more towards the plot, as opposed to the emotional fulfillment they got in TMWCIFTC. Characters like Gary, Mama, Boyd, and Alexandra take center stage for emotional and backstory development, while the original player characters take a temporary backseat. Alexandra’s a key linchpin of the story as a whole, both emotionally and narratively; Mama gets lore expansions and has personal things to settle; and Gary and Boyd are… here. So:
How do these two work with each other in TCOS?
It’s great. It’s fantastic. These two are my favorite to write in TCOS because their conflict is just so fucking FUN. On the one hand, you have an almost-ex-FBI agent who’s been taken in by the Lodge, is related to a Pine Guard member, is trying to keep his coworkers off the Lodge’s back as sneakily as possible without drawing suspicion, and is desperate not to screw up this second chance he doesn’t think he deserves. On the other hand, you have an ex-con who got a second chance from the Lodge, sees them as his last best option to be safe as long as nobody reports them, and wants to keep them safe out of a sense of familial obligation he’s reluctant to admit to, even to himself.
That’s two people with questionable morals, with a semi-familial attachment to a place that gave them second chances, each seeing the actions of the other as a threat to their - and everyone else’s - safety. Claws come out almost immediately.
At the start, Boyd and Gary go together like apple juice and toothpaste. Boyd sees a narc who’s threatening the one safe place he has left; Gary sees an impulsive, selfish threat, a domino that - if it falls - threatens, you guessed it, the one safe place he (and other people, sure) has left. Boyd breaking out of jail means the entire state of West Virginia, and probably the whole East Coast, is on high alert looking for him, and if that attention comes anywhere near the Lodge? They’re fucked.
Neither of them believe that the other is capable of change or anything but selfish, malicious harm. Boyd has more of an argument than Gary because Gary is still actively reporting things to the FBI, but in Gary’s defense, the moment that he stops reporting anything to them, they’re going to suspect things and might end up sending more people to the Lodge. The Pine Guard can’t afford that, so Gary has to play by the rules until he’s in a position where he can quit. I’ll pull a specific argument they have from TCOS that I feel really exemplifies this:
"I don't want you to get caught."
Boyd scoffed. "Something tells me you're not worried about me."
"I'm not."
"Well, thanks."
"I'm worried," Gary went on, "about someone seeing you, and connecting you to the Lodge. You just used the hot springs as your personal landing strip, in broad daylight. We're on the upper half of the mountain. And I don't know how big your Sylvan form is, but -"
Boyd grinned. It looked more like a snarl. "Oh, plenty big enough," he said.
Gary ignored that. "Big enough for someone to see you from down the mountain?" he challenged. Boyd's lip curled, and he looked away. "Yeah, that's what I thought. I'm just thinking ahead. What if someone came beating down our door looking for you? What if it was a cryptid hunter? What if it was the cops?”
"Yes, yes, fine, alright," Boyd snapped. He threw his hands up. His eyes were hard and cold. "It'd put us in danger. I get it. But you're still here. I think the damage is already done."
A knot of cold rage formed in Gary's stomach. "I'm trying to keep this place safe, Mr. Mosche," he spat. "I've got a responsibility to keep."
Boyd scoffed. "Oh, you have a responsibility? To Amnesty Lodge? That's fucking rich."
"You've got one, too! It’s about time you started keeping it!"
They’re both very, very set in their ways and their ideologies, and they take a long time to get to middle ground. 
One of my friends described it as middle child syndrome in overdrive. Gary thinks Boyd’s the Lodge golden child, come to replace him in the Lodge inner circle. Boyd thinks Gary’s the Lodge’s new redemption-arc fixer-upper, come to replace him. And both of them feel thrown off by that, because they both thought that the Lodge was accepting them completely into the inner circle. It’s unfamiliar, it’s confusing, and when the Lodge as a whole regards them both with suspicion/unease (Gary) and polite detachment due to the passage of time (Boyd), it makes them both feel on the outside.
And when you’re in the same shitty canoe, you’ve gotta row it or sink. So that’s exactly what they do. 
Ultimately, they get faced down with bigger and worse foes that snap them out of their spat, because their common interest is “keeping the Lodge safe” and uniting will help them get there. When they do start to have each other’s backs, though, that’s when they reluctantly start to get to know each other. Gary feels like something’s off about Boyd and eventually suspects - thanks to some comments from Haynes and some digging of his own - that Boyd had something to do with the fire that burned down Aubrey’s house, but it remains to be seen what he’ll do with that information. (The Gary of November 2018 would have turned Boyd in to the FBI. The Gary of almost six months later, though… a different story. It’ll be interesting.)
The kicker is, they’re both really similar, at the heart of it. Both of them were the Lodge’s fix-em-up pet projects, brought into the fold in an emergency and protected/cared for as long as they swore to clean up their act. They see each other and feel a bit out-of-place, though - something contributed to by the way the Lodge treats them.
Gary’s still held at a distance by many, despite being Duck’s cousin and a mostly-valuable member of the team, because the stench of the FBI is still on him - how he dresses, how he walks and talks, how he acts. And Boyd has just swanned back to the Lodge after 20 years gone, with all his memories of the Lodge from back in ‘98 driven back into his mind - and part of him is expecting the Lodge to be the exact same way it was when he left. But it’s not. You can’t go home again. The Lodge has moved on without him, which he never expected, and coming back to them is… awkward.
It’s simple. They don’t know what to do with a version of Boyd who’s missed the past 20 years of their lives; Boyd doesn’t know what to do with people who have changed from the folks he knew 20 years ago. He’s lost, floating, and alienated, like going to a high school reunion after not having spoken to a living soul since graduation. It sucks for him. And the only wholly unfamiliar face there, other than the main Pine Guard - who he’s mostly fine with, except for Ned - is Gary, and he can’t help but be irritated with him. That changes, though.
What I essentially want to do is set these versions of the characters up as foils. Similar characters, similar pasts, similar situations that got them to this point. All that’s different is how far in their respective arcs they are. So I’m going to have them be friends. Give each other a chance in the face of a bigger threat, open up a little more, have conversations, talk about things with each other because they’re the only ones around to listen. The Lodge gave them second chances when they needed them most. Maybe they can do that for each other.
This is also to say, I would be a massive fucking liar if I say I haven’t considered having that unfold into a rivals-to-lovers arc. Yeah, I said it. I’ve considered it, at length and in serious detail, since I started drafting the arcs for TCOS. In fact, that’s what I’m probably going to do. I’ve gotten too hooked by the possibility to give it up. I outlined hypothetical futures for the whole cast after the final battle in Sylvain and, given the things I want to happen in that battle and the messy post-war fallout, it makes sense that these two would gravitate towards each other.
It makes a lot more sense in context, believe me. They’ve got a long row to hoe before they trust each other enough to become friends, or even push the envelope towards a romantic relationship - they’d have months and even YEARS to wait to pull that off. Whatever I end up doing with them, they are easily my favorite part of TCOS to unravel, mostly because I  - and, honestly, everyone else - probably never saw it coming.
Thanks for the ask, anon. This made my week. So sorry for the long response, but I have so many thoughts on what I’m doing with these idiots, and putting them down on paper was really fun. Any other questions or comments about this? Fire away, I’d be more than willing to answer! 
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spunky-89 · 4 years
Text
Love and War
A/N: Heyyyyy, I feel like this is the only way I start a post but... I’m not dead yet. Moving Sucks. I want it to be over....... I have been trying to write a little bit when I have a spare moment (which is not often). I did finally finish this though, so that’s something. And the funniest part is this is not any of the one-shots I had planned :/ 
Anyway, enjoy :) 
Masterlist
Word Count: 3k(ish)
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You and Jordan had been together for years. You had met him in a rehab center for vets. You know, the ones they force you to stay at after you come home to make sure you're okay. Though you two were in different branches, Jordan being Army and yourself being Airforce, you clicked almost instantly. The two of you spent some time getting to know each other, and within a few months, you had decided to stick together. You were both unsure of what to do with your lives, but you knew you wanted a fresh start. So when Jordan recommended California, you didn't hesitate.
So once he got his spot on a police force in a smaller town in southern California, you were off. You decided to get a degree, the military paying for it. You weren't really sure what you wanted a degree in, but you had some time to figure it out while you got your Associates. You had joined the force straight out of High School so you hadn't taken a college class of any kind. Luckily you were a pretty good student back in high school, so you hoped it hadn't all been forgotten in 5 years. 
But that was a different problem than the one you were dealing with now. Unpacking and stocking your new apartment. Though you had already been in Beacon Hills for a few months, you were doing this very slowly, not sure how to proceed.
You and Jordan had very little belongings and didn't have much in the way of household stuff, so you had to buy quite a bit of stuff. The biggest issue was you were not a domestic person. I.E, you didn't cook or clean very well. It's not that you hated it or anything, your shitty mom didn't really set an example or teach you these things. You were learning, but it was a slow process. Even slower was figuring out what you needed and where the best prices were. Which Jordan was supposed to be helping you with, but he was MIA. Which was kinda worrying you.
Jordan had confided in you that he was worried because someone had made a kill list, one that included kids. He wanted to stop it, but he didn't know how.
Now that he was missing, you got worried. So you called the sheriff's station.
"Beacon County Sheriff's department, how can I help you?" A female voice answered.
"Hi, this is (y/f/n), I'm deputy Parrish's girlfriend. Is he still at the station? He called me over an hour ago saying he was on his way home but hasn't arrived. I'm just a bit worried with all these murders happening…"
“Please calm down ma’am, I am not sure if he went home yet but I will check with the Sheriff.” She replied in a calming voice.
She put you on hold and you took that time to start shoving your feet into your boots and grabbing your thick leather jacket to keep you warm. You also grabbed your guns. Though you were hoping you wouldn’t need them. You had your keys in your hand and were standing by your car, ready to go if they said Jordan wasn’t at the station. 
The phone came off of the hold tone about two minutes later, and this time, a male voice spoke.
“This is Sheriff Stilinski, one of my officers told me you were Parrish’s girlfriend and you think he’s missing?” 
“Is he there or not, I really am not in the mood for pleasantries right now.”
“Okay calm down.” He said.
“So he’s not there, great.” You snapped as you hung up the phone and jumped in the car, peeling out as you went hunting for any sign of your boyfriend. 
You immediately followed the way he always took to and from work. When you still couldn’t find him, you started to think like a killer, not a regular worried girlfriend. As you were driving, you noticed a massive inferno shoot into the sky. You had a gut feeling so you headed towards it, tires screeching and engine roaring. You noticed an empty parking lot where a car was blazing. It took you only a moment to realize it was a police cruiser. You screeched to a halt, barely turning off the car before exiting, your one handgun in your hand, the other tucked into your jacket. You kept your gun up and looked to see who was around. You noticed a man running from the burning car and towards his own car. Another cruiser. You heard your boyfriend screaming in pain. You had to make a split-second decision. Luckily, the military had taught you how to think on your feet. So you shot out the other officer’s tires and headed for the burning car. The car was engulfed. You were desperate to get your lover out, but you couldn’t figure out a way without likely dying yourself. You screamed his name as you saw him go limp in the car. 
You saw red.
You turned towards the other cop car and looked for the murder. You saw him scrunching down in his car, probably trying to find a way out. But that wasn’t going to happen on your watch. You walked away from the wreckage, using your rage to center yourself and focus on the current situation. Which was making sure this man paid for what he did. When he saw your form coming towards him, you saw the panic on his face and you smiled. You slowly walked towards the car. You could see him fumbling for his gun, but he was too slow. You used the butt of your gun to smash the window and unlock the door. As you opened the door to drag him out, he kicked you in the stomach which pushed you back a few feet. This gave him a moment to charge at you and knock you to the ground. Your head slammed into the asphalt but you used your pain to fuel you (also the adrenaline is the best pain reliever). You quickly grabbed him, kneed his balls, and used his distraction to roll him over. You had dropped your gun so you couldn't use it to knock him out, so you did the next best thing. You kept slamming his head into the ground. You didn't realize, but he had kept his gun and he tried to pistol-whip you, which made you disoriented for a moment, but that was all he needed. He then pulled the gun forward and shot your side. He pushed you off of him and started running to your car. But even with the pain, you rolled to grab your gun and before he had even made it halfway across the lot, you shot his leg. You made sure it wouldn't be lethal, but it would stop him from running. And it did as he fell flat on his face. You mustered your strength and stood up to walk over to him. He was moaning on the ground gripping his leg. You quickly kneed him in the head and he was out you muttered 'pathetic' under your breath. 
Once you got the asshole tied up (making sure to cut off the blood flow, and since it was only a surface wound you weren't too worried) you shoved him into your trunk. You did a quick dressing for your side to stop the bleeding. And with one last look at the burning car, you peeled out of the parking lot, forcing yourself to look away from the inferno in your rearview. As much as you wished you had gotten there sooner, you couldn't change what had happened. You could only get justice for the man who murdered your everything. 
Luckily the police station was only a short drive from where you were so you got there in no time. You pulled up rapidly, which made your tires squeal as you hit the breaks and parked directly in front of the doors. The sheriff and two teenagers quickly walked out. You got out of your car and barely gave them a look as you walked to the back of your car. You popped open the trunk, ignoring the sheriff who was yelling for you to stop moving and put your hands up. Once it was open, you looked over at the sheriff, tears running down your cheeks and said,
"He is a murderer and it took every ounce of self-control I have to not kill him on site. But I figured a quick death wasn't punishment enough."
You stepped back with your hand one hand up, the other gripping your bleeding side. 
The teenage boy exclaimed "holy shit!"
"Do you want to start explaining why you have one of my deputies in your trunk bleeding and tied up?" The Sheriff asked, his gun still pointed at you. 
Tears still streaming you said, "This bastard just burned Jordan alive." 
"Wait, Parrish is dead?" The girl asked.
You nodded, your head bowed. You were constantly switching from rage to intense grief and sadness. And with a look at the man in your trunk the rage came back and you screamed,
"This fucker didn't just kill him. He put him through hell before he finally-" 
Your voice broke before you could say the word you didn't want to think about.
"All for money. He just killed the love of my life for money. And all I could do was stand there and-and watch him burn." You murmured lowly.
The girl came over and took you by the shoulders, leading you into the station. 
Slowly the adrenaline started to fade and you felt the weight of the night hit you hard. And your mind became unfocused.  It was running through your memories, regrets, and what you had dreamed of for your future.
You hadn't realized, too stuck in your head, but the young female had sat you on a couch and was speaking soothing words. 
You had no idea how much time had passed, but when your focus started coming back, you half-heard a conversation.
"...hasn't moved or reacted to anything." You heard a female voice.
"It's a frequent thing…. shock or …. PTSD… mile stare… watched him…. Soldier…" this was a male voice speaking, he sounded young.
"Stiles….side." it was the female voice again, she sounded panicked. 
"Oh shit…. Bleeding really bad…. Hospital?.. I don't know wh…."
You heard a loud bang and jumped to your feet, pulling your gun from your belt and aimed it towards the noise. You then started swaying and dropped your gun due to the immediate pain in your side.
"Whoa whoa, hey, take it easy." The younger man said as he gently guided you back to the couch. You hissed in pain as your side was still sending shockwaves of pain through you.
"I'm fine, I've had worse." You said and gritted your teeth before standing and picking up your gun before creeping toward the door and cracking it open. You could hear the sheriff talking to someone, but it was too muffled to pick up the words. You cracked open the door ever so slightly. Your gun pointed out and just one eye peeking through. You didn’t see anything, but you could hear bits and pieces of the conversation.
“...you okay?.... Happened…. Dead…” you could only hear the sheriff, you had no idea who he was talking to but you intended to find out. You turned your head to the two kids behind you and whispered: “stay here.”
The boy went to argue, but you shut him down with a look. And you had a feeling it was more terrifying than usual due to the blood you were most likely covered in.
You crept out of the room, leaving it slightly cracked. You stuck to the walls and kept your steps near silent. As you got closer and could hear the other person, your heart stopped. You swore it sounded like….
You rounded the last bend with your gun pointed out in front of you and you nearly dropped your gun when you saw who the sheriff was talking to. You just managed to place your gun on a nearby desk before you launched yourself at the man in front of you.
"Whoa- oh." He seemed shocked until he realized it was you and he gripped you tight in return. You started crying again, not being able to help it.
"Oh god, I thought- I-I.. I watched you burn. I heard you screaming.” You sobbed into his chest.
“Shhh, I know,” Jordan spoke softly as he clutched you tighter. “I’m so happy to see you. All I could think about was you.” he murmured into your hair.
You pulled back from his chest and looked him over. He was covered in soot, his clothes were all but gone, but he was there. 
You glanced at the sheriff, then back to Jordan. 
“Is this real, am I hallucinating?” You asked aloud.
Jordan chuckled and pulled you back in, “No, it’s not a hallucination. I promise you I am as real as it gets.”
You heard shoes skidding to a halt behind you.
"Parrish? You're alive?" You heard the sheriff's son ask.
"Yeah, and I get the feeling things are going to get a lot more complicated." He said. As he shifted you to the side, keeping you in his hold, you hissed in pain. And the pain you'd pushed to the back of your mind came back.
"What's wrong?" He asked looking down to your side.
"Uh I may have been shot…" you got out with a grimace. 
"Okay. Are you patched up?"
"Nope."
He gave you a look and immediately lifted you into his arms to sit you on a desk. He moved your jacket and shirt away, then pulled off the shitty dressing from the bloody wound.
"You stupid, reckless, silly woman." He sighed looking up to your face.
"Yeah, I know." You said unapologetically with a smile. "Hospital or can you just stitch me up?"
Jordan proceeded to closely examine the wound.
"Looks like it was just a graze, but you've been bleeding for a while."
You groaned at the thought of having to go to the hospital.
"I'll make you a deal, I'll stitch you up but first thing tomorrow we go get you checked out and make sure you're okay." 
You squinted at him as he gave you that stupidly soft look that melted you every time. And he knew it. 
"Stop. No. I'm not gonna look at you." You said firmly as you closed your eyes and turned your head away.
You heard him shift while laughing lightly. "You are such a child." You could hear the smile in his voice. 
"Don't care, I won't look at you."
"Do you agree or do I have to wrestle you into the car and take you to the hospital now?" You could hear the smugness and you could imagine him staring at you with soft eyes, arms crossed and standing straight.
You looked at the floor and murmured a "fuck you…. smug asshole"
He laughed and patted your thigh.
"I'm going to clean up and then we'll get you stitched up and head home."
As he left to grab whatever clothes he could find and clean up, the two teenagers approached. The boy looked at you with awe and an intense look that said he had 800 questions. The girl followed behind looking slightly intrigued but clearly in a different way than the boy.
"Hey so that was crazy and you did a hell of a job on him and dad already gave him a quick patch but he's been whimpering since he woke up. What happened, how did you get shot? How are you-" you cut the young boy off by raising your hand and giving him a look. "Right, sorry."
You gave a half laugh as you shook your head.
"First of little Stilinski, why are you so interested and second why were you and your girlfriend here this late anyway?"
They both sputtered and tried to get out that they weren't a thing but you had a feeling if they really weren't together, they would soon.
You just chuckled and gave them a look. The girl then stepped up next to him and started talking.
"Look a lot is going on right now. We came here to talk to Stiles' father about something and that's when you pulled up." She said as if that answered everything. From the look of her and the brief description Jordan had given you, you figured this had to be Lydia. The girl he thought was a psychic.
"Hmm, Lydia is it?" You asked but didn't give her a chance to confirm nor deny, "If you think that is going to satisfy me clearly you aren't as smart as Jordan described. I was in the Airforce for a long time and had more training than you can fathom. With this, I know when someone is trying to hide something." 
"That's not what she was trying to do. And we don't know you, so we're not just going to tell you about all the things happening in our lives." Little Stilinski said, jumping to Lydia's aid.
"And you know what, that's fine. I don't need to know about your teen drama. But. I do have the right to know what's going on when it involves Jordi." You said, a look of fierce determination.
"You know I hate that nickname," Jordan said as he reentered the room.
"No you don't, you love it." You said with a soft smile.
"No I really don't, but I love you so I guess it's the same."
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seijorhi · 4 years
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asks :)
Y’all know the drill - some fic questions and general stuff below the cut
bastard cop daichi is top tier lewd and yandere material “can we hurry this up I gotta go fuck your sister” had me screeching
Bastard cop Daichi needs to be punched in the face, but.... hhhhh 👀👌🏻
As always, very well done *slow claps* 💕 Now I'm kinda curious, will Semi ever find out what really happened to y/n? Or will Daichi put the blame to him since Semi's most likely the suspect for y/n's "disappearance"?
I don’t think so. Between Daichi and Suga they’re going to go out of their way to make sure you don’t go anywhere. As far as Semi goes, it’s kind of hard to pin anything on him when there’s really no evidence, but they don’t need him locked up behind bars, they just need to suffer. Daichi can haul him in for questioning, tail him in public, maybe let it slip to your sister (or the papers) that he thinks Semi might have had something to do with your disappearance... and he can sit back and watch the fallout.
ahhh lol my first thot for the boyfie was kuroo mostly bc the boyfriend smirks n i know kuroo has kind of a creepy smirk smile
I mean tbh, I said that I had Semi in my head when I wrote it, but he’s not ever named because I kind of wanted people to guess and insert whichever player they wanted - the only qualifier was that they’d lost to Karasuno and were bummed about it... which would include most players (at least the ones we knew reasonably well). But also yes, Kuroo’s smirk does unholy things to me ngl
A MIYA TWINS SOULMATE AU?? AHHH IM GONNA DIE THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!! (This whole week was shit for me so just seeing that really made me feel better)
Miya twins soulmate au?? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
OH MYYYY HUHU I JUST SAW THE MIYA TWINS SOULMATE AS AN UPCOMING FIC AND AHHHHHHH IM SO EXCITEDDD. THANK YOU FOR THIS TREAT BBY HUHU REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS 🥰🥰🥰🥰 - @pamdamonyum (who requested this one)
I’m lumping these three together, but I’m glad y’all are excited and I hope it’ll be worth the wait! I was hoping to have it done by their birthday but uh... it might be a little late as I’ve got two fics to pump out first, but I’ll try :)
LETS GO SHIROTORIZAWA HOES YOUR WRITING MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM FROM ROOFTOPS ITS SO GOOD ITS SOGOOD
I am an absolute whooooore for Shiratorizawa. There’ll be more stuff for them soon, bby, I promise 💕
If you ever make a discord server for your readers to interact with you, i would gladly join 🥺👉👈
This is very sweet, but I can only imagined the kind of chaos that server would be. But you’re always welcome to come slide in my dm’s and say hi! I’m a little awkward gremlin but I promise I’m nice!
hi bby thank you for writing for all of us. ur doing absolutely amazing and i adore u and ur writing! please take some moments for yourself if you need to 🥺
You are a precious gem and deserve the world. Thank you, bby!
u always post when i'm asleep! it makes waking up so much better 🥰💕🥰💕😌😌🥰
This is the sweetest message? Honestly living in a wildly different timezone to what I feel like is a good 3/4′s of you guys sucks - I never know when the best time to post stuff is but I’m glad you like waking up to my nonsense. Ily!!
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makeste · 4 years
Text
BnHA Chapter 254: Who the Hell Is Bucky
Previously on BnHA: All Might welcomed 1-A back after the new year with a pun he’s probably been working on for the entire winter break, the poor man. Aizawa received a call :’) and drove down to Tartarus with Mic to meet up with Naomasa and Gran Torino. Nao and Gran were all “so you’ll NEVER GUESS, but we found out that Kurogiri’s quirk is apparently a FAKE QUIRK which was created from a bunch of other quirks -- AND GUESS WHICH ONE WAS THE ORIGINAL QUIRK?” and Aizawa was all (ಠ ∩ಠ), and Mic put a hand on his shoulder, and Nao was all “YEAH YOU DID GUESS, IT’S YOUR OLD DEAD PAL SHIRAKUMO, FROM CHAPTERS 59 THROUGH 65 OF VIGILANTES!” And okay, so (1) OH MY GOD, and (2) I originally thought this meant that Kurogiri is straight up a zombie!Shirakumo, but others pointed out that he might be some random other dude who just has Kumo’s quirk, among others. And like, okay. SO WHAT IS THE TRUTH.
Today on BnHA: Y’ALL HE REALLY IS A ZOMBIE!KUMO, AND NAOMASA AND GRAN BROUGHT AIZAWA AND MIC TO TALK TO HIM AND TRY TO RESTORE HIS MEMORIES SOMEHOW. Aizawa is all “this isn’t some fantasy world with happy endings, this is THE REAL WORLD WHERE MIRACLES DON’T HAPPEN!” but Gran is all “sometimes they do!” and Aizawa is like “!!” and so they sit down to chat with Kumo. Aizawa launches into a passionate speech about how great Kumo was and how he pulled him along and inspired him, and how he (Aizawa) is strict with his students now and -- get this -- FAKE-EXPELS THEM IN ORDER TO PUT THE FEAR OF GOD INTO THEM JUST ONCE LMAO, BUT IT’S BECAUSE HE CARES, and because he wants them to be great heroes and not hapless redshirts who get killed offscreen. And by the end of it he’s crying and imploring Shirakumo -- “if you’re still in there somewhere” -- to become heroes with him and Mic just like they always wanted. All of it is exactly as emotionally devastating as you would figure, btw.
you guys I have been playing hopscotch on my dash since yesterday trying to avoid spoilers about the popularity poll until I actually had time to write down my reactions! all I know is that of course Bakugou is #1 again, because this fandom always comes through lol. my other predictions are that the rest of the trio will receive lots of love again as well, and Hawks will once again be high on the list, and Aizawa too because of the Vigilantes flashbacks (at least HE BETTER), and probably the villains will get a big boost as well after their arc, Tomura in particular. and Endeavor might break the top 10 again too with the newest arc, although I can’t quite remember whether or not the poll was still going on by the time that started (ETA: actually I don’t think it was). but yeah. anyway so there’s a real possibility that most of the kids will actually be shut out of the top ranks because of these GROWN-UPS and VILLAINS stealing all their glory, smh. your time will come, kids
“more than anyone, you were a hero” oh is this chapter going to play with my feelings yet again. is this just going to happen every fucking week now. okay
HELL YEAH MY BOYS ON THE COVER
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@unboundednamelessfuture, to answer your ask about whether I’m planning on watching Heroes Rising, the answer is a resounding YES, POSSIBLY EVEN MULTIPLE TIMES IN THEATERS IF I CAN SWING IT, because I’m pretty sure it’s actually just going to be All My Dreams Come True: The Movie. and yes I have seen some spoilers for it, although I’m not clear on whether or not they’re actual spoilers or just rumors. so because of that I won’t post my thoughts just yet, except to say that if it is true, see above re: All My Dreams Come True: The Movie, and also add a bunch more exclamation points at the end of the title omfg
anyway so my sons are famous now. they’re in Hollywood. good for them
AND NOW THE POLLLLLLLL YES
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oh shit, I heard about “Deku & Bakugou Rising”, but is that out this week?? shit I’ll have to do a separate post if that’s the case. I’m assuming it’s more of a bonus chapter than an actual spinoff, kind of like the All Might chapter we got for the last movie. either way, to say I’m hyped would be a massive understatement, needless to say
(ETA: okay so I’ve seen Korean scanlations of this -- which I didn’t look at closely because spoilers -- but no English scans yet. so stay tuned!)
so I was wrong about the kids being shooed out of the top 10! I have never been so pleased to be wrong! so we have Kacchan at #1 (I love his face so much. ghlkhf), Deku at #2 (he beat Shouto this year! good for you!!), Shouto at #3 (wouldn’t be surprised if he and Deku were neck and neck again though), Kirishima at #4 (we stan one bright ray of sunshine), Iida at #5 (YOU DESERVE IT SO MUCH SWEETHEART. I’M SO GLAD FANDOM ISN’T SLEEPING ON THE ACTUAL BEST CHARACTER IN THE SERIES), Tomura at #6 (DID YOU NOT GET THE MEMO ABOUT WEARING A NUMBER ON YOUR OUTFIT? MAKING ME FIGURE IT OUT FROM THE PROCESS OF ELIMINATION IS A REAL BASTARD MOVE. THEY SHOULD HAVE PUT YOU AT #8 TO MATCH YOUR CURRENT NUMBER OF FINGERS YOU STUPID SEXY JERK), Aizawa at #7 (THANK YOU FANDOM, YOU’VE REDEEMED YOURSELVES FROM LAST YEAR), Ochako at #8 (I LOVE YOUUUU), Toga at #9 (LADIES!!!!!!), and Momo at #10 (YES GIRRRRRL)
I think this is the strongest showing of ladies yet in the top ten (ETA: actually no, the second poll was slightly better) and I’m all about it. also can they all please keep these costume upgrades because YES. I don’t care if Horikoshi would get sick of drawing them. THAT’S WHAT ASSISTANTS ARE FOR. KATSUKI HAS A FUCKING BULLET BANDOLIER, COME ON, YOU CAN’T MAKE THIS JUST A ONE TIME THING YOU ASSCLOWNS, THIS IS FOR THE PEOPLE
lol here’s the abridged version of the Shirakumo flashbacks, I guess. everyone was saying last week how Vigilantes was now required reading, and like, I get that everyone’s excited about the crossover, but they still have to make this comprehensible for people who only read the main series. I’m guessing we’ll get the short version here, but Vigilantes gets to provide the more in-depth story for people who want to know more about everything, which is more or less what Vigilantes’s role has been in general
anyway so here’s Kumo doing his usual Naruto impression and cheerfully dooming himself by being ceaselessly optimistic and tempting fate’s sense of irony
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you sure can! just so long as that crisis doesn’t involve big, heavy rocks, or gravity. I’m sorry kiddo
“‘let’s all form an agency together.’ it happened just after he said those words.” well there you have it, the BnHA equivalent of “one week left till my retirement.” hero training should really include a mandatory course titled Death Flags: The Silent Killers. there are children’s lives at stake here
lol yeah this really is abridged
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“once upon a time we all wanted to be heroes and then Shirakumo got crushed by some rocks the end.” yeah, so maybe not quite the full emotional impact of the original lol
OH SHIT SON
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so it is his reanimated corpse, then! which means the potential for him somehow dramatically regaining his memories is very high. since this is a shounen manga, I’m gonna go ahead and put it at... 100%. is that too low
guys I don’t know what to do when Present Mic is making faces like this
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when even the Comic Relief Guy is getting all traumatized and serious, you know it’s bad. sob who will I turn to now for comfort. Horikoshi’s really just gonna go full dark no stars here and leave me just stumbling around lost
OH IF IT ISN’T THE ORIGINAL PIECE OF SHIT HIMSELF!!
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yeah it makes perfect sense actually, you bastard. you steal the bodies from the crematorium and then give the families fake ashes or something. holy shit you really will not stop until you find the lowest possible level to stoop to, and then grab a fucking shovel and start digging so as to GO DOWN EVEN LOWER. just. god everything about this is just so wrong
oh btw, now seems like a good time to bring up this ask I got last week!
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anon you blew my mind, just so you know. you’re absolutely right. so that’s one mystery down! though the way that this is going, I’m not so sure I’m gonna like any of the other answers that the Noumu arc is gonna provide us sob
holy shit look at this fucking simile
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dead children = leftovers. sure why not. just in case we all forgot how evil he is
and also, YEAH BUDDY THAT’S WHAT I JUST FUCKING SAID, PLEASE KEEP UP. and who even knows how many other times AFO has done this. I hope they’ve started investigating crematoriums, then. I’m just waiting for them to make some connection that leads to them finally finding out about Ujiko, but that might take a while still
(ETA: although if they actually can get Kumo to talk...)
and did he really just solemnly call Mic “DJ” because omfg. Gran, are you the comic relief. do you even know. are you even aware
oh hey look another dagger to my heart
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ouch. that was cold. and... not necessarily true, though, is it? because he was kind enough to Tomura. idk, I know my villain mom has done some horrible things, but you’ll be hard pressed to get me to think of him as all bad, even so. he was the one keeping Tomura from going FULLASS MURDER MODE!! for a long time
HEY WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF COP-OUT IS THIS
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well then WHY DID YOU EVEN BRING THEM IN HERE! DID THEY NOT SEEM TRAUMATIZED ENOUGH TO YOU?? “well idk they seem pretty shaken up already, but just to make sure they grasp the full repugnant horror of the situation why don’t we make them visit him face to face.” OKAY THEN YOU SADISTS
son of a bitch and speaking of twisting the knife, Horikoshi keeps showing us these increasingly wrecked glimpses of Aizawa lowkey falling apart and I can’t
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at this point the shadows under his eyes have their own shadows. and god dude, I know you’re rational, but it’s really hard to watch you just outright dismiss any and all possibilities of hope just like that :(
what the fuck Gran
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so you really are the one in this scene who’s trying to lift everyone’s spirits now. well all right then, just what are you alluding to
OH SNAP
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LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD NOUMU BACKSTORY AT LAST! jesus christ, do Nao and Gran just know everything already, and they’ve just been keeping it all to themselves for the hell of it?? how long before they casually swing by U.A. and are all “oh and by the way, the traitor is...”
ANOTHER AIZAWA FACE BUT THIS ONE IS SOFT OH GOD!!
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HEY WHAT’S UP I’M GONNA CRY. SOMEONE TURN ON SOME SAD MUSIC. AND I WON’T GO, AND I WON’T SLEEP, AND I CAN’T BREATHE, UNTIL YOU’RE RESTING HERE WITH ME
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AND I WON’T LEAVE, I CAN’T HIDE, I CANNOT BEEEEEEEE
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hey Nao. you know what really would have helped with getting him to talk. NOT KNOCKING HIM UNCONSCIOUS. ??? move over do you need someone else to do your job for you or
-- OH THEY’RE TALKING TO HIM NOW LMAO OKAY
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“go ahead and do your thing guys. don’t be afraid to make it real gay”
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this would be even more dramatic if Kurogiri actually had a face. but even so... OH I AM WHAT I AM. I’LL DO WHAT I WANT. BUT IIIIIIII CAN’T HIIIIDE
oh my fucking god Aizawa is all “but what about his family?” and Naomasa is literally “if you two are unsuccessful, then...” like straight up acknowledging that the three of them were so fucking gay in high school that their odds of getting through to Kumogiri are stronger than that of his OWN FUCKING FAMILY. wow
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chin up my sexy man. you got this
OH SHIT AHHHHHHH
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LDSKFHL EASY THERE CHAMP, THAT’S TOO MUCH SEX TO BE CONTAINED IN A SINGLE PANEL, PLEASE TRY AND DO ME A FAVOR AND FUCKING HOLD IT TOGETHER HERE FOR THE KIDS WHO ARE READING THIS!! [frantically googles ‘can a shounen manga get you pregnant’]
so Aizawa is all “I’ll be damned if I let his family hear this sickening story” and like, I’m sure he means that in a “they don’t deserve that pain” kind of noble and principled way, but if it were my child I sure would want to know regardless. and aren’t they going to find out either way?? either you do get through to him, in which case obviously you would want the family to know “HEY, GOOD NEWS!”, or you don’t manage it and Nao has to call them anyway as we just established. but you go ahead and get all fired up then, Shouta
now there’s a panel of him staring at Kumo and Kumo is just a big shapeless blob of black smoke just sitting there lol. don’t tell me he’s still unconscious?!
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oh
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thank you
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anyway so Aizawa, did you know that while you were off being an underground hero, Kumo was studying at Oxford to get his medical degree while bartending on nights and weekends to make ends meet. the two of you have so much to catch up about
Mic’s thinking that even with Aizawa using his quirk, the fog isn’t dissipating, so it means Kumo’s body is now made up of fog. well but then what about the metal neck thingy! huh??
and Mic’s opening his big mouth to complain that Kurogiri is far too polite and classically educated to really be their old pal, but before he can finish, Kumo is interrupting to ask about his son!!
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he’s. uh. I guess you could call it “well”? maybe a little too well [marge simpson noises]
well Mic is clearly back to being the comic relief here. but Aizawa is keenly spotting those mom instincts that have remained in Kumo to this day!
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yes Aizawa the core of your friend is still in there deep down!
OH MY GOD
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LMAOOOO. “EMO PUNK... WHERE HAVE I HEARD THAT BEFORE -- !!” [AUDIBLY GASPS AND LOOKS DIRECTLY AT AIZAWA]
oh my lord. like, I don’t think this is actually meant to be funny, but just the fact that he immediately associates “emo” with AIZAWA FUCKING SHOUTA so strongly that it makes him go (•̪ o •̪) all knowingly has me fucking deceased right now good grief
so Kumo says he doesn’t resent his mission at all. some people like looking after emo punks, Mic. you should know
AND NOW MY FEELINGS ARE BEING TOYED WITH AGAIN!! JUST STRAIGHT UP OUT IN THE OPEN!! THIS ISN’T FAIR
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heh. don’t mind me I’m just looking for some sort of emotional support to cling to here for my breakdown that’s about to happen about 0.2 seconds after Aizawa starts crying, if he indeed starts to cry. which it looks like he might. oh god I’m not ready for this at all. my hatches are not even remotely battened; my shutters are just gonna go flying right the fuck off
by the way what the fuck is up with the chairs at Tartarus. why do they look like swiss cheese
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hmm, Nao and Torino are all “no reaction”, but to me it looks like there clearly is a reaction, though? he can’t even look Aizawa in the eye all of a sudden. it’s clearly getting to him. Nao seriously, do you need someone else to do your job
oh Aizawa
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(ETA: Kumo really first-named Aizawa two seconds after meeting him. this man knows how to adopt his introverts.)
okay but Present Mic in a summer uniform is the most punchable version yet, SORRY I JUST HAD TO SAY IT I’M SORRY MIC I LOVE YOU. it was just gonna come bursting up out of me if I didn’t
anyway so Aizawa is gaying it up just as promised
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him using his quirk is definitely making the scene more intense, but I’m not really sure why he actually is using it, since we’ve established it’s not having any effect. unless he’s trying to possibly undo some of the brainwashing somehow??
(ETA: so it occurred to me that just because his quirk isn’t dissolving Kumo’s mist body doesn’t mean that it’s not having an effect on his warp abilities. this way they can interrogate him without fear of him trying to use it and them having to knock him out again.)
so Kumo’s continuing to try and play it off all smooth while Aizawa unleashes the full force of fifteen years of pent up grief and trauma!
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starting to think Aizawa never did go to therapy after that whole thing. typical U.A. “so you saw your best friend die suddenly and violently right before your eyes and subsequently suppressed it and hallucinated his voice talking to you to avoid facing that reality, huh? eh, you’ll be fine”
oh no a close-up of Aizawa that doesn’t show his face completely. this kind of thing never ends well
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BECAUSE HE DOESN’T WANT THEM TO END UP LIKE YOU [sobs forever]
wait are we really going to talk about this?? omg
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wait what. so do you mean to tell me he expelled them but then continued to guide them afterwards so they would have long, happy and healthy careers but more importantly would be safe omfg I’m not fucking ready for this shit
we’re cutting to U.A.’s class 2-A! Aizawa’s former class? does that mean he literally expelled EVERY SINGLE ONE of his students last year omg
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so then. does every single standout characteristic of the Aizawa we know and love stem from his tragic past and his relationship with this boy then, or what? meanwhile the feelings continue to torrentially lash against my house while I huddle in the basement
I can’t fucking believe we’re actually getting a legit reveal about the “Aizawa expels all his students” gag holy shit
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re-enroll!? what?? and “expel” in quotation marks?!?
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ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS -- HE DID IT JUST TO SCARE THEM!? AND THEN WHAT, WERE THEY PICKED UP AFTERWARD BY THE OTHER HERO CLASSES INSTEAD? SO HE TEACHES THEM A POTENTIALLY LIFE-SAVING LESSON AND THEN GETS TO LAZE AROUND THE REST OF THE YEAR, LOL WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. THIS MAN IS A GENIUS
(ETA: and by this logic, Deku really ought to have been expelled half a dozen times by now. don’t ever try and tell me that this man doesn’t play favorites.)
so Aizawa is taking his goggles off and saying that he’s strict with his students because he wants them to live long, fulfilling lives
OH NO
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SOMEHOW HORIKOSHI MADE KURO’S FACE LOOK SOFT?! I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW, IS THERE ANYTHING HE CAN’T DO
AHHHHH
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OH NO HE DID IT AHHHH THE TEARS, FUCK. WELL MY HOUSE IS FUCKING DESTROYED, I’M CLIMBING UP TO THE ROOF TO AWAIT RESCUE
wow. anyways that really did get gay as fuck at the end, didn’t it. given the meaning that those goggles have to Aizawa, can this be taken as a form of marriage proposal? no? well I’m taking it that way anyway, so. congratulations you two. I’m off to go sob into a pillow now
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