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#fans didn't like how he was changing and maturing
peppertaemint · 4 months
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Ooooh Shinee world is a mess today and for once it's not taemints fault 🥲
An article about fans asking for a Taemin would tour and "shawols" in the quotes going "no shinee" "shinee first" "wait until Jinki comes back so shinee can have a world first"
Like, I too would love a Shinee world tour, I want all of them both solo and as a group to go everywhere(in particular where I am but I won't hold my breath) but that wasn't what it was about. It was fans of Taemin's solo music asking for a tour.
It baffles me cause you never see this kind of thing with the other members. No ot5 shawol will ever expect another member to put their work on hold but, when it comes to Taemin it's like some people can't stand to see him spread his wings.
People never expect Key to put his variety work second, or for Minho to not take acting job, shawols have actively gotten mad if they think Minho had to turn down acting stuff due to his schedule. All Taemin does is music. That is his thing but some fans just cannot seem to respect his career. And all the baby talking in the quotes "we love our cutsey wootsy little taeminnie *but*..."
It's getting really irritating. I used to think some of what taemints say is exaggerated and I still believe that a bit. People were getting angry that the Shinee account didn't post Taemin's hanteo artist of the year nomination and only posted Shinee's, but it makes sense to me. They don't want to split votes and a win for Shinee is a win for all of them. But at the same time some of the disrespect I've seen towards him from supposedly ot5 shawols has been eye-opening.
I dunno, this fandom has been a mess lately and it's only the 4th. 2024 is off the quite the start.
Lol, I sort of find it funny when it's not Taemin fans being the mess-makers. Like they are the worst-behaved, though I would say each solo fandom has their unique flavor. But, what you're highlighting is the biggest open secret in shawol-dom.
Let's have sexy photos in this post for no reason.
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Like, shawols are for the most part chill. I've been around these parts for a long time, and a bad day in shinee world is miles and miles better than a bad day in BTS fandom and similar. There isn't violent language or a huge level of harassment. I just want to acknowledge that because the complaints I'll make next are from the privileged shinee world perspective where there is a higher behavior standard. That is the case, even when Taemin fans are being stupid. Like, not once did I see the Golden Disc Awards violently harassed.
So, the open secret: it's all yay Taemin until he gets too much attention. And you noticed it's still very much "our baby taemin" even tho man's been out there trying to fuck the stage for a decade, lol. I see these as two sides of the same coin. They want him in his place as perpetual baby to uwu over, and daring solo work is fine as long as it doesn't outshine everything.
I think with Key it's easier for people to compartmentalise because he's super super successful outside of SHINee when it comes to TV and sponsorships (istg he IS Olive Young, lol; his face was all over Seoul), but those things don't directly compete with SHINee's work. These are complementary endeavours. Key's solo work is now having its career high since Bad Love, and it's only growing, so this condescending solo situation may repeat itself. But, Key's also not the group's little baby. I can't see him being treated the same. The fandom's most egregious behavior towards him has always been rooted in stereotypes. I mean, look how quickly and comfortably people slotted him into this squabbling "marriage" dynamic with Minho. Their arguing is funny, despite how played up for the camera it can be, but I see a lot of "iykyk" weird posts about him and Minho. Anyway, I'm getting sidetracked.
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There is always going to be an element of competition when it comes to solo work. Onew's Circle just got named Billboard's #1 kpop album of 2023. Guilty didn't even make their best of list. Now, I think Guilty was overlooked but Onew deserved #1. It's an extraordinary album. Minho is cultivating this very sexy and mature solo repertoire. This competition will grow, but I think Taemin will always be the target of condescension, minimizing and infantilizing.
He's the perpetual baby who will be put in the obedient baby box. And those fans will be incised when/if Taemin gets to do something they find meaningful before SHINee, even if it's a clear matter of logistics. There is a definite attitude present, and you might notice there is a certain superiority fans have over his solo work. I've been in situations where people have quite literally said they think X member's solo concerts are better than Taemin's with their whole chests. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, but when it comes to him, people are wayyyyy to comfortable putting him down.
Anyway, it will always be a bigger "but not him" with Taemin because he was given solo first and has built this legacy of work and has a lot of influence within the industry. Stolid group fans take pride in that when it suits them, but want him to be sidelined when it interferes with their desires.
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coolspacequips · 7 months
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My unpopular opinion abt the new Castlevania series ig is that I just don't have any care or sympathy for these little church goons that they were trying to humanize this time around... Like Olrox revenge kill go off, I watch u kill that boys mom minute 1 but I'm still in ur corner bbygirl! I see ur thru line.
But then his little shitty church bf sanctioning and standing by all the actions of the church and also we don't talk about the homophobia he's supporting while also being gay and also sleeping w a man his church would have (and did) sanctioned the genocide of several times over... I'm supposed to think the way he shut Olrox down was anything worth feeling bad for, I just rolled my eyes at his self righteousness. Walk away from that man, Olrox!! We saw where this manic Christian love leads, and it's what ur Abbott did (who I also don't give 1 fuck about him or his white xtian guilt especially after That LOL)
I guess I can tentatively respect that the church guard's storyline is gonna potentially be about deprogramming him, but I hate that they seemed to be posing him as correct in accusing Olrox of having no soul, when we as the viewer know it was an act of love that he didn't think he was capable anymore, after what was done to him at the hands of ppl that the church guard. To me all i felt was the heartache from his POV so common in these communities where u thought you have a Good Christian that saw you, but he still sees you as the monolith of his imaginary enemy the second push comes to shove, even though your actions have shown again and again that there's nuance to be had
#the only whites that gave gotten a pass from me is baby belmont and the speaker mom#who's daughter I'm sure will mature i want to like her but she got shackled into a plot w the abott#which means we have to spend a lot of time on his white man pain about how he had the power to do so many terriblw things and chose to do i#anyway just wanted to get this off my chest i couldn't watch it fast enough and don't remember the guards name#and didn't look it up bc i don't want someone looking for him and starting a fight w me#just sucks bc i love Olrox so much and a lot of his fan content is him w this man i can't stomach tbh#i hoped he would be different i hope he can change or that Olrox finds someone else#text posts#i don't want to get into it too much more i have to rewatch this show bc baby belmont and Annette are my kids and Edouard is so special 2 m#bls im not a hater so if u like the guard i don't care#i just have a lot less interest in these types of threads ik some ppl who have been victims of the church find them cathartic#but i often find the storyline too much in the business of comforting the oppressor being represented and find them tedious#raised in American South where a lot of the cultures being examined exist and have flavored it#particularly this time period being looked at w plantation slavery plus French and native relations being v highlighted in my region#ugh anyway let me not get started x2 plus i don't care who's side drolta is on#she's bad and unjustified just insane and likes murder and looks very hot while she does it the end#(i love her every show putting black girls in it take note of the way they treated her hair so many styles 🥺💕)
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phoward89 · 1 month
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Based on this ask & this ask Series Masterlist
Soft!Dark!Coriolanus, Dark!Coriolanus, StepDaddy!Coriolanus, Stepcest, Stepdaughter!Reader, Daddy Kink, Smut, DDLG, drug use reference, cougar/cub relationship, older man/younger woman
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Chapter 1:
Your mother, recently widowed for the second time, sat you and your younger brother down on the living room sofa because she had an important announcement to make. She even had your older brother, who was serving as an officer for the Peacekeepers in 12, on video call for the special announcement.
An announcement that would change the rest of your life.
“Children, I'm getting married to the Head Gamemaker Coriolanus Snow.”
“What the hell?...” Your younger brother, Darius, trailed off in disgust.
“Mother, I went to the Academy with that guy! He's too fucking young for you!” Your older brother, Rein, shouted.
“Oh my God, you're a cougar!” You exclaimed, trying but failing not to laugh. You found it a bit funny that your mother has managed to snag a man your older brother's age. Who would've thought. Maybe all those facelifts paid off after all…
“Will you children stop it?” Your mother scolded all three of you. “Coriolanus is a nice man who's about to declare a Senate run. He's very successful and mature for his age.”
“Sounds like he's freaky to me.” Darius, who was 13, remarked.
Oh, if only you all knew how ‘freaky’ Coriolanus Snow was. And he wasn't truly into cougars freaky either.
Snapping his fingers, causing the screen on his end in the Peacekeepers base to crackle, Rein said, “Lil bro’s right, man has to be freaky to wanna marry somebody old enough to be his mother.”
“Maybe he really likes her.” You shrugged, trying to put out any fanning fires before they flare up.
Oh boy…if only you knew who Coriolanus really liked. And it wasn't your mother, that's for sure.
“Or maybe he's marrying her for father's money?” Darius popped up with another theory.
“He was named Strabo Plinth's heir for being best friends with the man's only son. I don't see why mother's money would mean anything to him.” You told everyone, since you didn't think that a rich man would be a gold digger.
“Coriolanus Snow was always a shifty bastard.” Rein spat out in disgust. “Walked around with a stick up his ass in the Academy.” Your brother mocked the blonde your mother's now engaged too. Leaning in closer, so that his face was almost pressed up against the camera screen, he revealed, “Heard that he was given an extremely early discharge instead of being shipped to 2 for officer's training- which I'm glad for cause I would've strangled that pompous motherfucker if I had to do my training with him- cause Plinth desperately needed an heir.”
Your mother shook her head, only to order in a fed up tone, “Will all of you calm down? Whether you like it or not, I'm marrying him and he's going to be your stepfather.”
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A week before the wedding you moved into Coriolanus' penthouse. It wasn't the 12th floor Corso penthouse he was raised in either. No, it was a new top floor penthouse in downtown Capitol City; in one of the Luxe Buildings. Actually, it was in the same building your friend from the Academy, Odysseus Odair, lived in.
When the Avox answered the door, your mother strolled on in like she was a queen. “Coriolanus, we're here!” She called out to your soon to be new stepfather as you and Darius walked inside of your new home.
“Rein’s right, dude looks shady as fuck, sis.” Darius whispered to you as Coriolanus came strutting down the hall in a deep red 3-piece suit, hair short on the sides and slicked back in a tight coif. “I don't trust him as far as we can throw him.”
“Be nice. He makes mom happy and he looks-” You began to tell your baby brother, only for him to cut you off with, “If you dare try to tell me that he looks happy too, then don't.” Looking between Coriolanus giving your mother a peck on the cheek, which looked more like the kiss of Judas then affectionate, and you, Darius said, “He looks like what I imagine Lucifer did before he fell from grace.”
“Don't call him Lucifer.” You chastised your brother.
“What? If the name fits…” He sing-songed with a shrug.
Coriolanus said something to your mother, only to shoo her down the hall before making his way over to you and your little brother.
“Here comes Satan.” Darius quietly whispered, never moving his mouth- much like a ventriloquist.
Coming to a stop right in front of you and your brother, Coriolanus flashed you a smile. One that was too sweet, too wide, showing off too many pearly white teeth. “Y/N.” He greeted you, your name dripping off his tongue thickly, causing your heart to race. If he was handsome looking at a distance, hell…he's hotter up close. And the way he just said your name? Holy shit…
Turning to your brother, Coriolanus’ face turned to stone. His voice was cold and clipped as he greeted him with a backhanded, "Oh, Darian isn't it?”
“Darius.” Your brother quickly corrected the tall platinum blonde looming over the two of you.
“Ah, yes, that's right.” Coriolanus nodded his head in a dismissive way. “Darius, the Avox will show you to your room.” He told your brother before snapping his hands and ordering the nearby Avox to, “Show Darius here to his room. Also, make sure his things are unpacked.”
The Avox took your brother upstairs to show him to his room while Coriolanus gave you a lingering look. A look that made your stomach do somersaults.
“I'll show you around your new home.” He told you, placing his hand on the small of your back and guiding you across the room.
“Thank you, but you don't have to do that. I know you're busy with your upcoming Senate campaign.”
“I'm your daddy now, my sweet baby girl, and daddy’ll always have plenty of time for his baby.” Coriolanus told you with a glint in his icy eyes and a husky tone in his voice. Perhaps too husky…
You didn't say a word, just let him show you the living room before bringing you into the kitchen. “We have a cook, so if there's anything special you want don't be shy to request it.”
“Is our housekeeper, Marisol, here?” You innocently asked, since you didn't see the woman (originally from 2) in the penthouse. You had assumed she'd be moving with you, since she lived with your family in your old townhouse.
“Yes-” Coriolanus heavily sighed while directing you out of the kitchen. “About that. Well, she missed her family back in the districts so she decided to go back.”
That was a lie. Marisol didn't decide to go back to 2. Coriolanus sent her back. In a pine box. Because she was too dangerous to be kept alive and around you. She cares about you too much, was warm and motherly to you. He knows that the former housekeeper would warn you away from him. Hell, would probably fight him- all to protect you from his plans.
Yes, his dark plans to finally have you.
And by have you, well, Coriolanus wants to take your innocence. He wants to be the first and only man to fuck you. He wants to be your lover, your confidant, your other half, your man.
He can't have some District 2 immigrant housekeeper ruining his plans either. Not when everything's perfectly set in place.
Yea…
Coriolanus isn't marrying your mother because he likes her, he's marrying her to get close to you. All because he's obsessed with you. And the thought of having you call him Daddy while he pounds your pussy drives him wild.
You could say that Coriolanus has a bit of a daddy kink. One that he plans on enacting with you real soon. You're 18 and you'll be graduating from the Academy soon. Now's the perfect time to get everything he wants.
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After seeing the first floor of the penthouse (yea, the grand thing has 2 floors!), which included your mother sitting out on the patio deck with a cocktail in one hand and cigarette holder in the other, Coriolanus led you up the sleek, modern staircase- that had a glass wall bannister. Instead of leading you to your room, he took you over to the balcony- which had a glass wall as a railing.
“All of this is yours, my darling.” Coriolanus whispered, breath hotly fanning your ear, as his hard muscled chest pressed against your back. His large, calloused hands were on top of yours, which were holding onto the railing, as you looked down at the first floor of the penthouse. He nuzzled your hair with his prominent nose while letting out a husky promise off, “Anything you want, you desire, Daddy’ll get it for you, sweet baby girl.” His thumbs run over your knuckles as he lightly grinds his hard bulge into your ass. “Daddy’ll take such good care of his precious baby girl, now that you're all mine.”
Your brain began to explode. What the hell?! What's going on?! Is your stepdad (well soon to be stepdad in a couple of weeks) coming onto you? Yes, he's your older brother's age (they went to the Academy together), but he's marrying your mother. This can't be happening!
Oh, but yes, yes it is.
It's happening!
Coriolanus, knowing that he has to show you to your room, pulled away from you. You let you a breath you didn't even know you were holding, but you also felt a slight tingling feeling between your legs. A dampness. You know it's wrong it let Coriolanus words affect you so strongly, but they did.
“Come on, Y/N.” The platinum blonde god of a man told you, grabbing your hand and dragging you away from the balcony. “I need to show you to your room.”
“Okay.” You simply said, voice trembling a bit from the slight ache in your core.
Damn him for turning you on just a moment ago.
Coriolanus smirked at hearing the slight tension in your voice. He liked that he was making you all hot and bothered. Having such power over you thrilled him, gave his already too big ego a boost.
He pointed to a bathroom, only to tell you that it was yours before coming to a stop at your room. Across from your room were intricate French doors, trimmed in gold vining roses. With a wolfish grin, Coriolanus gestured to the doors across from your room and told you, “That's my room, my darling.” Pinning you to your door by holding your hands above your head in one of his large hands; leaning his head to ghost his lush lips over the shell of your ear, he huskily coos, “It's my room, all mine, so you're allowed to come in and spend time with me anytime you want.”
“But-” You began to object to his forward come on, since he was marrying your mother soon, but he cut you off by placing a finger on your lips. Grinding his hard bulge, which was very sizable, into you, he lustfully declared, “My room’s my own, sweet girl, so I assure you that we won't get caught.” Your eyes went wide, causing him to nibble at the sweet spot behind your ear. “I know you want to fuck me as badly as I wanna fuck you, Y/N. I can hear your labored breathing and can feel you clenching your thighs; they're rubbing against my legs.
“Coriolanus, you're marrying my mother and you're-” You began to try and reason with him, only for him to grab your chin in his hand. Squeezing it harshly, he confessed, “I don't care about that old whore. Helenium’s only a means to an end; you're the one that I want. That I crave, that I want to bury my cock deep into; fuck full of children.”
“We can't do that, Cor-” You started to say, only for him to curtly cut you off with, “Call me Coryo or Daddy.” Caressing your cheek, he lustfully smiled, “You'll be calling me Daddy while I fuck you, baby girl.”
Oh boy…you're in for it now.
You felt the heat pooling deep inside of you. Your pussy ached with such want, one that you've never felt before. And even tho you knew it was wrong, you needed relief. God, you needed to find a way to get yourself alone in your room so that you could play with your pussy.
As if he could read your mind, Coriolanus rolled his hips against yours, causing you to stifle a moan, while telling you, “You want to hide in your room, fuck your fingers, but you don't need to do that anymore. Not when you have Daddy to fuck you; make you feel good.”
The offer was tempting, but there was just one catch.
“I'm a virgin, Coryo. I-” You began to explained, only for Coriolanus to press a kiss to your lips, shushing you. All words died on your lips, causing Coryo to rest his forehead against yours and say, “Don't worry, sweet girl, Daddy’ll pop your sweet cherry when you're ready.” Your heart raced in your chest as he told you, “Daddy'll feast on your pussy, finger fuck you, and teach you how to suck cock- like a good baby girl- tonight.”
The sound of a doorknob turning and a door beginning to open caused Coriolanus to back away from you- as if he’d been burned- and scurry off into his room, leaving you leaning against the door of yours, as a nearby door slammed shut followed by footsteps coming up the hall. You just sighed, turned around, and went inside of your room.
You expected to see your things in your room, or at least boxes with your things in it, but instead you're met with a room that was baby pink. Actually, it wasn't just baby pink, but it was covered in girly decor. The furniture was white, the duvet was pink rose print, the satin sheets pink, and the pillow cases pink roses with pink ruffles. A large white mirror sat on top of a white vanity that had a vase with a single white rose perched on it, along with white pearls, and a silver compact. You also have a wooden hair bow organizer on the wall filled with bows and ribbons in various shades of white, cream, red, pink, and rose prints.
And when you inspected your closet, to see if maybe your clothes were unpacked, you noticed that you had an entirely new wardrobe. Instead of your usual clothes, your large walk-in closet was now filled with mini skirts, dresses, blouses, and sweaters in various shades of cream, white, and pink. There were even a few red items amongst the mix too. And all of your shoes were replaced with Mary Jane’s in a few different shades and a pair of designer black kitten heels. You know, the ones with the red bottoms. And don't forget about the shelf filled with designer handbags in every size in the colors of white, cream, pink, and red.
Yes, red! You had about 20 new handbags and at least 5 of them were red!
Oh my God, Coriolanus did all of this for you…
It made your head spin.
A knock sounded at your door, causing you to call out a simple come in. You expected Coriolanus to strut thru the door, but instead your little brother, Darius entered.
“Sis, daddy dearest is a fucking whackbag. He gave me a closet full of new, snobby clothes and a handbook on how to behave properly like a Snow.” Darius told you as you sat down on your vanity chair. Taking in the decor of the room, he huffed, “And he's made you the croquette aesthetic princess.” Shuddering, he waved his hand about and said, “The walls look like they've been painted in pepto bismol.”
“Darius, stop. He's just trying to be nice.” You defended Coriolanus without even thinking twice about it.
Did you secretly desire the forbidden fruit? The man whose obsession with you has led him to marry your mother. Just to get you under his roof; in his bed.
Yes.
Yes you did.
And whether you fully know it yet or not, you're sneaking into his room tonight to see if he's bluffing about what he wants to do to you.
Wandering around your room, Darius scoffed. “There's nothing nice ‘bout Satan, sissy.”
“Don't call Coryo Satan, Darius.” You scolded your brother as he opened up your dresser drawer.
“Coryo?” He asked, brow raised. “I see he managed to win you over. What'd he do, promise to give you your own black Amex?” Darius sarcastically asked, only to slam the drawer he was rooting thru shut. “That sick fuck gotcha a lingerie drawer full of lacy stuff.”
“I doubt he got it. Maybe his cousin picked them out for me, she is a stylist.”
“Yea, maybe.” Darius nodding, all the while making a mental note to keep an eye on how your new stepdaddy acted around you.
Mhm…
After seeing that panties drawer, well, your little brother didn't trust Coriolanus around you. Not that he trusted the guy to begin with.
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Late that night, when everyone was asleep, you found yourself in Coriolanus' room; writhing in his bed with his head buried between your legs. Your hands clutched his platinum blonde curls tightly, letting out little mewls as he lapped at your soaking cunt. His nose bumped against your clit, causing your hips to buck-chasing your pleasure.
“Oh…Daddy…” You moaned as he began to messily eat our pussy, his head moving side to side vigorously. Oh god, could Coriolanus eat cunt. He was a natural at it; born to do it. And his skill was going to make your eyeballs roll into the back of your head, was going to make you cum for a third time.
The first time he made you cum was when he had you pressed against his bedroom door, panties pulled to the side with his long, large fingers stuffed deep inside of your pussy. The second time he has you cumming was just moments ago, when he was tongue fucking you.
Coriolanus loved hearing you call him Daddy in the bedroom. It made his hard cock even harder, of that was possible. It was such a turn on. Yes, it was dirty and taboo to be fucking with his soon to be stepdaughter (twisted even), but he didn't care. Coriolanus always did what he wanted; society be damned.
Hell, with his silver tongue he had turn society to his will. Make and change the rules. So, he's not worried about the Capitol finding out about his dark, kinky side when it comes to you- his sweet little stepdaughter. His baby girl.
He's got a plan in place of how to navigate his marriage and the corruption of you. Eh…he doesn't plan on being married that long. He just needs to find the opportune moment to get rid of your mother. Of course, after he's married to her for a little while (just long enough to get his grubby hands on all of her money; her assets, and your brother's inheritance that he tricked her into signing over to him in an updated will).
Coriolanus poisoned your first stepfather, General Prometheus Byzantine because he refused his offer of courtship for you. The General laughed in his face; told him that he'd get to you over his dead body. He also told Coriolanus that his stepchildren (you and your older brother, Rein) would not be inheriting anything from him or your mother, that your little brother, Darius, would get it all. That Coriolanus was better off finding a proper Capitol girl- perhaps one closer to his own age, to marry.
But the stoic platinum blonde didn't want just anybody, he wanted you. And he'd do anything to get you. Which’s working so far, considering he's devouring your cunt like a starving man.
“Coryo…Daddy…please…” You begged, on the verge of cumming again, as you felt the knot burning low in your depths begin to tighten
Resting his head against your thigh, he lustfully told you, “Daddy's got you, baby girl. Daddy's gonna make you cum again.”, before sucking hard and fast on your clit and pistoning two of his long fingers in and out of your cunt; curling them just right to hit that spongy spot deep inside of you.
And while your chest is heaving, moans are spilling out of your mouth, and your hips are bucking like wild, Coryo’s feasting on you like your cunt as if he hasn't eaten in years. Your juices taste so good to him, so intoxicating. He can honestly say that your pussy’s the best he's ever tasted (and he's eaten a lot of pussy); he'll even say that he craves it's sweet, tangy nectar on his tongue now.
Oh, and how eating your cunt has him so turned on. So achingly hard, that he's roughly grinding into the mattress, desperate to seek some relief. But the sloppier he eats you out, drawing moans and mewls from your sweet lips, the harder and faster he humps into the mattress. The silk sheets teasing his cock, which was trapped in his boxer briefs.
Suddenly, the tension inside of you snapped and you were cumming. Mixed moans of Coryo and Daddy filled the air as your hands tangled in Coryo’s blonde curls, shoving him deeper into your cunt as you rode out your high.
The scent of your cunt, your juices soaking not just his tongue, but his face, and you calling his name sent Coryo over the edge; had him cumming in his boxer briefs.
Once you relaxed and let go of his hair, Coryo got up and stripped out of his underwear (he couldn't wear cum filled boxer briefs all night) and then rejoined you on the bed. Laying next to you, he held his arm open- inviting you to snuggle up into his side. Having never been with a man or experienced aftercare before, you just stared at him questioningly. As if you weren't sure whether to slide up next to him or not.
“Y/N, my darling rose, come here.” Coriolanus instructed, patting the spot next to him before stretching his arm out again; making room for you.
“Okay, Daddy.” You nodded, scooting your body to lay flush against him.
Wrapping his arms around you and holding you close, he chuckled, “You don't have to call me that all the time, baby. Just when we're fucking around.”
“So, outside of the bedroom you're Coryo then.” You concluded, resting your head on his chest.
“Unless you want me to fuck your brains out somewhere risky, where we might get caught, then yea- save Daddy for in here.”
“So, you have a Daddy kink “ You stated, not asked, as Coryo started to run the tips of his calloused fingers up and down your spine.
“Yes, and I'm also a Dom.” He stated, as if he was telling you what degree he earned in University, before listing off the other kinks he has. “Kink wise, I'm into spit play, impact play, anal play, and degradation.”
What the fuck have you just gotten yourself into? That's a lot of stuff he's into. And, well, you have no idea what any of that stuff is.
“Oh…” You trailed off.
“Hey, little dove, I know you're new to this so don't worry about all the things I like. We'll ease you into it; even find out if you like something I haven't mentioned.”
“Okay.” You agreed, nodding against his chest. A chest that looked like it was sculpted by Michelangelo.
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You two cuddle together for a tad bit longer, just talking about little things. But then, you let out a yawn and the platinum blonde man knew it was time to send you on your way; back to your own room across the hall.
It was a good thing that your mother had a master suite downstairs, otherwise all of your moaning might've woken her up. Unknown to both you and Coryo, your little brother Darius (at the age of 13) had a bit of a drug problem. He developed it shortly after his father, Prometheus, died. So, since he was strung out in his bedroom down the hall, your moans didn't wake him up. Infact, a bomb could go off and it won't wake up Darius.
Coryo had no idea that marrying your mother, a week after your first encounter with him, in a scheme to get all of her money along with your younger brother's inheritance (In order to give you what he felt you rightfully deserve) was going to give him the family the reporters, media outlets, and political opponents and rivals needed to skew his golden boy image. To screw up his Senate campaign.
Looks like the only thing Snow's landing on top of is you. 
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megalony · 9 days
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You'll See Him Soon
This is an Eddie Diaz imagine, requested by anon. I hope you will all like it, I wrote this one so quickly. Let me know what you think.
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Eddie Diaz Masterlist
Summary: While (Y/n) pops by the station, her and Eddie both end up getting shot. And the team race to get them both to the hospital before they lose them.
Enjoy.
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"So, lunch on Tuesday?"
A grin broke out on (Y/n)'s face and she turned to the right, looking over at her big sister with a smile.
"Yep. You know we'll have to invite Buck though, right?" (Y/n) laughed at the way Maddie rolled her eyes.
They had gone out today on a girl's day while Evan, Eddie and Chimney were all on shift. That was all well and good, but it made Evan feel left out. Whenever they went out together on a girl's day, they ended up going to the movies or going out for lunch another day with Evan. The three of them were a close-knit sibling unit and Evan seemed to think girl's day should also include him.
"Hm, I know." She cast a sly grin across at (Y/n) before she looked ahead and turned the next corner.
"You can just drop me at the station, you know. Eddie will be finished by now and he said he'd give me a lift home." They were only three minutes away from the station and it saved Maddie having to go past her flat to get to (Y/n) and Eddie's place.
It meant she could just drop (Y/n) here and make the short trip home and (Y/n) would go home with Eddie. As long as he wasn't currently out on a call but even if he was, (Y/n) would just wait at the station for him.
"Don't forget to ask Eddie and Buck about getting that night off next month."
(Y/n) groaned and pressed her temple against the window at the mere mention of what was going to happen next month. She could feel a headache forming behind her eyes at the thought.
"If they don't get it off, I'll be down at the station with them." (Y/n) could hear her sister laughing, but she wasn't joking. She was being serious. If neither of the boys got that night off, (Y/n) would be joining them and hanging out at the station for the night.
There was no way (Y/n) and Maddie could get through dinner with their parents without Eddie and Evan there with them. It wasn't often that they saw their parents nowadays and that was how the three siblings liked it.
But (Y/n) knew when she told them she was pregnant, they would want to come down and see them all. She had been surprised they hadn't come down sooner, but they were finally coming down for three days next week and (Y/n) was dreading it.
"At least they're happy this time… they're excited." Leaning across the console, Maddie rested her hand on (Y/n)'s leg and gave her a little shake to make her smile.
"Yeah, after they said I wasn't old or mature enough to be Chris's mum. Now this is 'their grandchild' they've changed their tune."
(Y/n) kept her head against the cold glass that felt soothing to her skin. She dared to glance her eyes down and her expression softened when she looked at her bump. Her fingers danced over her abdomen and she started drawing aimless patterns like Eddie had started to do recently. (Y/n) didn't realise how attached to her stomach Eddie would be until she finally started to show.
Not long before she and Eddie got married last year, her parents had tried telling her- in front of Eddie- that she wasn't mature enough to be a mother to Chris. And she had seen the conflict in their eyes when Chris called her mum. They didn't see how much it meant to (Y/n) that Chris thought of her as his mother.
Because she was the youngest sibling, they thought she was somehow incompetent at doing anything.
Only now it was different because (Y/n) was the first one out of the three of them to have a child. Her parents had changed their minds because they could see (Y/n) was the happiest she had ever been with Eddie and she was settling down. They were going to be grandparents and it sparked a small change in them.
Although (Y/n) knew if they dared say anything when they came down, Eddie would blow a fuse.
"So… have you thought of any names yet? I think-"
"We are not calling her Maddie." (Y/n) shook her head and shot a glare across at her sister who was just about to turn into the station car park.
"Why not?"
"Because it's your name. It's bad enough Buck's trying to hustle in and pitch Evelyn for a name. We're not naming her after anybody."
(Y/n) had seen Eddie's eyes light up when they went to their scan two weeks ago and found out they were having a girl. She knew he had been hoping for a girl and she could already tell their daughter would have Eddie wrapped around her little finger.
But the couple were starting to regret telling people because they were all coming up with names and ideas left, right and centre. Evan had been bummed they couldn't name the baby after him, until he realised Evelyn was close to his name and kept pestering Eddie to pick that name. And even though Maddie was joking, she had pitched Madeline to them a few times.
God knows there wasn't anyone on (Y/n)'s side of the family she would want to name her daughter after- except for her big sister. But (Y/n) couldn't handle two Maddie's and getting confused and having to come up with nicknames for each of them.
And she had asked Eddie if he had anyone on his side that he thought about naming their daughter after, but he wasn't keen on the idea. They wanted something original. A name no one else in their friendship circle had.
"Fine," Maddie huffed with a roll of her eyes as she parked up and whipped off her seatbelt. She turned to the left and looked over at (Y/n) with a tender smile before she danced her fingertips across (Y/n)'s stomach. And her smile brightened when (Y/n) moved her hand down so she could feel the baby wriggling. "Well what about Dolly, because she'll be as cute as a little doll."
"I'll think about it." (Y/n) would admit that it would be sweet to call her Doll or Dolly, especially if she was small and delicate. But knowing their luck, they would agree on that name and then either their daughter wouldn't suit the name when she was born or she wouldn't be a small baby.
She gave Maddie's hand a squeeze and grinned, but just as she took off her belt and looked to the left, a pair of hands slammed against the window.
(Y/n) screamed as Maddie gasped and reeled back in her seat with a frown when they both realised it was only Eddie.
He had a wolfish grin on his lips while he crouched down to look through the window. He seemed to make it his mission to give (Y/n) a fright recently and she was sure it was because he loved to make her scream and liven up the baby.
"Eddie!" (Y/n) hissed and slammed her hand down on the window before she moved her hand to her chest, trying to regain back her breath.
Her brows furrowed into a deep frown as Eddie opened the door and when he held his hand out for her, she batted it away and climbed out. "Don't do that! Do you want me to have a heart attack?"
She gave his shoulder a shove and tried to glare at him, but it was hard when he grinned down at her with such a wide smile that his cheeks and eyes creased. And when he leaned over and wormed his arms around her waist and reeled her into his chest, (Y/n) didn't have the effort to push him away.
"No, just keepin' you on your toes, baby."
His palms pressed flush against her back and he pulled her into him until their chests were touching and (Y/n) had to hold onto his shoulders to steady herself. She pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes on him when his lips attached to the side of her neck "Look what you've done," She muttered quietly, reaching behind her to hold Eddie's wrist and move his hand from her back until his palm was pressed into the side of her stomach.
"She's happy to see me." He grinned against her neck and bared his teeth, lightly grazing against her neck until (Y/n) gave his shoulders a squeeze and started to squirm in his arms.
He lifted his head up so he could kiss the side of (Y/n)'s temple and his arms curved back around her. Keeping her pinned into his chest and when she curled her arms around his neck to hug him, he started to sway them both from side to side. And Eddie turned his head to the left, grinning over at Maddie as she got out the car and leaned against the door with a grin and raised brows.
"Did you two have fun?"
"We went for lunch, then we saw a movie."
They hadn't made any plans today, they had decided to have a girls day but see what they felt like doing when they went out. Both of them had been hungry, so they tried a new restaurant for lunch and then decided to go to the movies. It had been a while since they had gone out together and seen a movie and it was something they used to do every weekend when (Y/n) was younger.
"Someone had to leave the screen twice for a drink refill. Little miss lemonade with lime cordial."
(Y/n) rolled her lips together and looked up at Eddie through her lashes when he scrunched his nose in distaste and gave her an odd look.
"You don't like lime juice." That wasn't something Eddie had ever known (Y/n) to drink and it was an odd combination. And it wasn't like (Y/n) to go and get a refill drink either, she barely drank enough during the day to keep her going so it was a nice surprise to hear she kept getting another drink.
"Hm, your daughter does," Maddie chirped with a wide grin before she looked down at her watch. "Right, I'd better love you and leave you, I'll see you both at the weekend for games night. Tell Buck I said hi."
When Maddie climbed back in the car and blew a few kisses their way, they stood back and waved her off.
"Is your shift over?" (Y/n) dragged her eyes up and down Eddie's frame, only just realising that he was still in his starched navy trousers and button up shirt. Her fingers dug down into his shoulders and she tilted back a little when Eddie leaned his chest against hers and stole a deep kiss from her lips.
"Hm, just gotta get changed, then we can go home." He could see that was music to (Y/n)'s ears.
Sitting down in a movie theatre was all well and good, but (Y/n) was starting to feel tired already and she hadn't done that much today. She wanted to go home, make tea and slump on the sofa with her boys.
"So, was the movie any good?" Eddie curved his left arm around (Y/n)'s waist to keep her tucked up into his side as they walked round to the front of the station. He stuffed his other hand into his pocket and pressed his lips to the top of (Y/n)'s head when she leaned her cheek against his shoulder.
"Yeah, but I missed the ending queuing for the toilet." In all honesty (Y/n) had missed a few crutial parts of the film when she went to go get another drink, twice. And then she had to hurry out twice for the toilet and the queue had been horrendous at the end. It was lucky she was only five months along with the baby or she wasn't sure she would of been able to wait as long as she did for the queue to go down.
She could feel Eddie laughing into her hair as both their steps came to a halt when they noticed Hen, Chimney and Evan all gathered in a little circle just outside the station doors.
"What kind of meeting is this?" (Y/n) quipped with a grin and she leaned over when Evan looped his arm around her shoulders and reeled her under his wing for a hug.
"Shift change-over. Me and your hubby are leaving, these two are staying for the next four hours." Hen hitched her bag higher on her shoulder and smiled triumphantly as if she had just won a game.
They were all out here because the trucks were being restocked and the ambulance was out on a call. It was quieter out here than inside where everyone was hustling and bustling to stock up and clatter and change over. And Hen was getting ready to leave whereas Chimney and Evan were taking a breather before they went back in for the rest of their shifts.
"So, how's Evelyn?"
(Y/n) rolled her eyes and unhooked her brother's arm from her shoulders before she crossed her arms over her chest. But she smiled when Eddie reached behind her to give Evan a light shove.
"I've told you, we're not naming her after you." He gave Evan a pointed look before he moved his hands to his hips and leaned his head to one side. It didn't matter how many times Evan tried or how much he pestered. Eddie's first daughter was not going to be named after his brother-in-law.
(Y/n) leaned into Eddie's left side, trying to hide her grin when Chimney started to laugh.
"Debatable." Evan remarked with narrowed eyes before he looked back down at his little sister. He wasn't giving up just yet; he could pester them for a lot longer to see if they would give in and go along with the name he had chosen. "So, how is she?"
"She's fine."
"So, are you two-"
Whatever Hen was about to say tapered off when a sharp, shrill noise cut through the air and shifted the atmosphere around them.
A gunshot.
Nobody knew where it came from. They didn't know who fired, where they were standing, what kind of shot it was that was directed at them. Or who the shot was aimed for.
Terror dug its claws into (Y/n)'s chest and ripped out her lungs when her head turned to the right.
It was Eddie. Eddie was the one who got shot. She didn't see the bullet hit him, but (Y/n) knew the moment he had been hurt; his left hand clawed into her back and made her wince. She knew by the way his fingertips punctured into her hip and how his hand fisted her flesh like he was trying to tear a chunk off that the pain hit him instantly.
She didn't see the shot, it happened far too quick to see the bullet fly through the air or see it hit her husband. But when Eddie's shirt around his right shoulder started to turn berry-red, it ignited (Y/n)'s heart until she was matching the pulse rate of a hummingbird.
Her hands grappled for Eddie, holding his back and scrunching her other hand up in his shirt over his chest to try and keep him upright, but she couldn't.
His name passed her lips like a whisper in the wind and when Eddie's lips parted, (Y/n) could hear the quiet breath he huffed.
There was no expression on his face, his eyes weren't in focus, they were dazed and staring ahead into the distance. His lips parted but he wasn't saying anything and he was barely breathing. It was like someone had refreshed his system and he was completely blank.
But he couldn't stay upright. It felt like hours had passed when barely a second ticked by from the bullet entering his shoulder to Eddie's body tilting backwards.
"Eddie-" (Y/n) curled her hands into fists around his shirt but she couldn't hold him up. He fell too swiftly and with too much weight for (Y/n) to try and keep him on his feet. Her body shuddered and she winced when his fingers stayed puncturing into her back where she knew she would have bruises later.
He crashed down on his back on the pavement, his head bouncing against the concrete slabs harsh enough that it should have cracked his head open.
(Y/n) snapped her eyes closed on instinct when she started to fall with him but a scream burned at the back of her throat when it felt like the back of her right thigh had suddenly been torn apart or bitten by a rabid dog.
Her knees crashed into the floor and her hands shook against Eddie's chest as she landed with a crash so forceful it sent all the blood down to her legs and her head started to spin. Black and white spots danced in front of her eyes and she let her head bash down into Eddie's chest, gasping to try and keep herself awake and alert, but everything was on fire.
(Y/n) could feel every pounding beat her heart thrashed out. She could feel her heartbeat beneath every inch of her skin and her pulse throbbing in her ears. She felt like her head was going to explode. Bells were ringing in her ears along with her heartbeat. Hot coals surrounded her body that felt like it was melting and scorching hot.
Her knees were aching- her right thigh felt like it had been shredded to ribbons.
"Eddie… Eddie, baby," Words dripped past (Y/n)'s lips but she barely heard her own voice.
She tried to focus herself and move but everything began to shake. Her hands were trembling up and down like she was doing some odd kind of dance but she managed to cradle Eddie's face between her trembling palms. Her thumbs swiped across his face and she tried to tilt his head in her direction.
His eyes were still open but they weren't focusing properly, he was looking through (Y/n) rather than at her. But he was awake. (Y/n) needed him to stay awake.
It was only then that (Y/n) managed to get her ears into focus and she realised she could hear voices around them. She remembered it wasn't just her and Eddie in this situation. Her brother and their team were here too.
"Cap we've got a shooter!"
"Get inside-"
"Eddie's been hit!"
"Get inside- get them inside now."
Hands grappled with (Y/n)'s shoulders and a quiet "No," tumbled past her lips when she felt a chest pressing down into her back and whoever it was nudged her to the side.
She wasn't sure who was holding her back but she began to cry. She had to stay with Eddie. Why weren't they letting her hold Eddie? She had to make sure he was okay and somehow get him inside. (Y/n) had to stay with him; they couldn't try and tear them apart like this.
His name tore past (Y/n)'s lips again and her hands tried to latch around her brother's bicep when Evan crouched in between her and Eddie.
He was working on overdrive. Evan could barely move from the amount of adrenaline that was shooting through his system and it made him feel sick. His thighs burned from how he was crouched, balancing on the heel of his boots while his trembling arms grabbed his brother in law. He looped Eddie's arm around the back of his neck and dug his fingers into Eddie's good shoulder like tallons.
His left hand grabbed Eddie's hip and with some effort, Evan hoisted his brother up onto his shoulder.
"Go!" He all but roared, waving his arm out for Hen and Chimney to get inside with (Y/n). He needed his sister inside with them. She had been hurt too and Evan wasn't sure where she had been hit. He could see the blood soaking down both her legs and pooling on the floor and he dreaded to think where it was coming from.
His legs shook as he bolted through the open doors, trying to stay hunkered down low so he and Eddie were less of a target for anymore bullets. But he heard another gunshot ricochet against the shutters and it made Evan cower.
Why was someone shooting at them? What had they done? They were emergency responders, they saved lives, they didn't take them. There was no reason for someone to be taking revenge out on them.
Why had they shot Evan's family?
"Eddie-" (Y/n) felt a pair of hands on each of her arms and she let them lift her up but as soon as she was on her feet, she screamed.
A banshee howl left her lips and she coiled her right leg up off the floor. Standing on both feet felt like a knife was slicing down from her hip to her toes. Someone was cutting her in two. Someone had taken her husband away from her. She needed to get him back.
Her foot bent at an awkward angle beneath her and she tried to hop on her left foot, dragging her right leg behind her like it was a third, useless limb she didn't need. Her head flopped forward, gluing her eyes to the floor that was littered with tiny flecks of blood like someone had walked by eating strawberries.
Her hands dug into Chimney's arm and shoulder and if she had the energy, (Y/n) would have tried to tell him she could walk. She would of tried to hold herself up if she wasn't drowning in panic.
She barely felt Hen run past her to open the truck doors.
Hen climbed in the back of the truck. Bobby climbed in the driver's seat. Evan and Chimney dragged their family towards the truck. It was their only mode of transport to get out of here and make their way down to the hospital when the ambulance was already out on a call and was far too small to transport them all.
(Y/n) could hear Bobby shouting orders, but his voice sounded quiet and distant like he was shouting from the other side of a lake.
"Lockdown the station when we leave! Nobody in, nobody out!"
A groan rumbled through Eddie's chest and vibrated against the back of his throat when he felt himself suddenly being tilted backwards.
He could barely comprehend why he was suddenly being lifted up by Evan or where he was being taken. The view of the station was blurred. Everything looked like a watercolour painting but the paints were too runny and blending together. Eddie couldn't make sense of anything.
His lungs stuttered and clenched when he was hoisted off of Evan's shoulder and he was held up on his feet by someone behind him and Evan in front of him, gripping his wrists so tightly he was going to snap them.
Evan climbed up the steps, leaning backwards to keep Eddie's weight and keep him stood up. And when he was up, Evan carefully twisted Eddie to the left and laid him down over the seats. He could see the movement sent Eddie's whole body convulsing and he gasped for breath at the feeling of his shoulder coming into contact with the chairs.
"Okay come here; I gotcha." Spinning on his heels, Evan reached his hands down and held onto (Y/n)'s forearms while Chimney stood behind her. She was much easier to manouevre than Eddie, she was alert and responsive and somewhat helpful.
Her nails scratched into Evan's forearms and a choked sound rumbled past her lips when he pulled her up. When her foot caught on the top step, waves of electricity flowed through (Y/n)'s leg and spots danced in front of her eyes as her head fell forward into her brother's shoulder.
"Cap, go, go!" Hen bashed her fist on the roof before the truck came to life and they all jostled forward as Bobby shifted into gear.
(Y/n) thrashed her arms out until her hands planted down on the seats and she let her weight fall down until she was on her knees in the footwell. She stretched her right leg out behind her, trying to ignore the throbbing pain that felt like her whole leg was vibrating with her heartbeat.
It was as if her leg was hanging on by a thread that was about to snap. (Y/n) wished it would. If that thread tore, it might take away the pain. She just wanted it to stop so she could focus on Eddie. He was her priority.
Her chin pressed down on Eddie's good shoulder and her trembling hands clutched his shirt so tightly she popped the first three buttons open.
Her head was pounding. Her eyes couldn't see anything more than Eddie, blurs and stars twinkled all around him like he was an angel or a vision from Heaven. She leaned closer to him when Evan hovered beside her. Evan held onto the headrest to hold himself up while he leaned over Eddie's chest and pressed a large pack of gauze down on the bullet wound.
He winced when Eddie coughed and groaned and his eyes almost popped out of their sockets. Eddie's head lifted up when pressure pushed down on his shoulder and felt like a hand was physically breaking through the muscle to touch the most sensitive nerves around his bone.
The pressure set something off inside Eddie's body; an extra dose of adrenaline coursed through him and made him a little more alert.
"Are you hurt?" Eddie's voice was gruff as he grunted and managed to flop his head to the left to look over at (Y/n).
He blinked slowly and tried to prize his eyes open wide so he could look her up and down but his vision was going blurry. He was glad his good arm was closest to (Y/n). He flopped his arm off the chair and slumped his hand onto her arm so he could trail his tremoring fingertips over her body.
She had blood smears on her shirt, but he couldn't find an entry wound. She had blood on her face but he couldn't see any cuts. Her breaths were shallow and her body was trembling but Eddie didn't know where she had been hurt.
His fingertips moved down until his hand touched her abdomen and he kept his unfocused eyes on (Y/n) to watch any change in her expression. He moved his hand from left to right, becoming more frantic with each second when she didn't say anything and no one told him if she was hurt or not.
"S-she okay?" Eddie tipped his head back into the seat and coughed when Evan applied more pressure. He was going to bust his shoulder if he pressed down any more than this.
But he tried to look back at (Y/n) when he realised she was only clutching his shirt with one hand. He felt her other hand hold his wrist and press his hand down on her stomach to make him stop checking frantically.
"She's okay."
(Y/n) did her best to smile, despite the tears that were pouring down her face and each breath she took which hitched higher and higher than the last.
Her eyes stayed focused on Eddie, but when she felt Hen applying pressure to the wound on the back of her right leg, (Y/n) couldn't help but cry out. A scream cut past her lips and her eyes snapped closed as she smothered her face down against Eddie's shoulder to try and stay awake when it felt like she was going to pass out.
"Where's she hurt?" Evan took the words right out of Eddie's mouth while he leaned over to try and look his sister up and down. He had seen her fall and heard her cry out, but he didn't see a bullet hit her. Evan had to assume she was hit from the pain she was in and the way she was starting to deteriorate the same as Eddie.
"Right thigh, just above her knee. Someone give me their belt, I need to stop the bleeding."
Chimney leaned back on his heels and yanked his belt free from his trouser loops and handed it over. He moved his hands to (Y/n)'s shoulders and tried to comfort her and keep her still as he moved to press his fingers against her neck to check her pulse.
Another scream mixed with a tepid cry coursed through the air when the belt sank into (Y/n)'s leg like teeth chomping down on her flesh. She could feel her leg and her foot pulsing and throbbing and vibrating like she was a boombox screaming out a beat.
But when (Y/n) lifted her head from Eddie's shoulder, she could see his eyes rolling near the back of his head and his breaths started to pick up and become fast and shallow.
"Just hang in there, two minutes, okay? Stay with us, Eddie." Evan gave Eddie's neck a jostle and tilted his head from side to side to try and keep him conscious. He couldn't fall asleep on them, he had to stay awake and conscious until they got him to the hospital. Why couldn't he stay awake like (Y/n)? He needed to stay alert with them.
"You're gonna be okay, baby." (Y/n) couldn't keep her voice level and she hiccupped through her words as she tried to push closer into the chairs to be next to Eddie.
She swiped her eyes and nose against her sleeve but she could feel her head filling up with air like a balloon. She wanted to go to sleep. She wanted everything to stop. She wanted Eddie to wake up properly and be okay. (Y/n) wanted to rewind time and usher them all inside so nobody got hurt.
Why did it have to be Eddie?
Her hand moved to cup the side of his face and she swiped her thumb across his jaw while her other hand dragged through his hair, brushing the curls away from his eyes. She knew he loved it when she carded her fingers through his hair. Maybe this would keep him awake with her.
"We're here! Eddie, come on let's go. Don't you fall asleep on me."
Eddie's head tilted back and he choked, barely able to breathe when he found himself laid back over Evan's shoulder once again. His left hand tried to reach out, but Evan was moving too fast for Eddie to comprehend. He could taste (Y/n)'s name on his lips and feel the way his nerves tingled when he tried to say her name, but it didn't make a difference. He couldn't see her anymore.
Bobby pressed his hand to the back of Eddie's neck and helped Evan carefully lower him down onto the stretcher that was already waiting for them to arrive. Two nurses and a doctor smothered Eddie with an oxygen mask and a pulse monitor on his finger before they began to move him.
A frown pulled on Evan's lips when Eddie gripped his wrist weakly and gave a sharp tug. "What? What?"
Evan tried to move with him but they moved Eddie too fast and his grip wasn't strong enough to pull Evan along with them. But he heard that one word that spluttered past Eddie's lips.
"(Y/n)."
Leaning down, Hen curled her arms around (Y/n) and pulled her back when she tried to crawl forwards after Eddie. Shallow, gasping breaths left (Y/n)'s lips and her hands scratched against the metal floor as she tried to drag herself to the door.
"Eddie-"
"He's with a doctor, which is where we need to take you. He'll be okay, you're both gonna be okay." Chimney reached down for (Y/n)'s left arm and looped it around the back of his neck before he carefully stood up and the pair of them lifted (Y/n) up between them.
Each gasping, startling cry she let out made them wince and they could feel her shaking back and forth between them like she was hypothermic.
Chimney slowly climbed down the steps but he paused when Evan appeared in front of them like an omen. He held his arms out and reached up for (Y/n), taking her weight for her to help her down from the truck.
"We need another stretcher over here! Pregnant lady with a gunshot wound!"
Both (Y/n)'s hands moved to grip Evan's biceps and she tried tilting her head back to look up at him but it only made spots flash in front of her eyes. She could feel her knees buckling and giving in and she was sure she would be laid out on the floor at any given moment.
"Eddie… I w- wh- where's Eddie?"
"It's okay, you'll see him soon. Let's g-"
That was all she needed to hear. Those words acted as a switch in (Y/n)'s brain and everything started to shut down.
Panic sparked through Evan's body like a wildfire when (Y/n)'s head slumped onto his arm and her body went down. He deadlocked his arms around her waist and lifted her up, pinning her chest against his to stop her from hitting the floor while they waited for another stretcher to be rushed over to them.
Evan leaned down and looped his right arm beneath (Y/n)'s legs, cringing and gagging when he felt the blood instantly soak onto his skin and drip down between his fingers.
Oh God.
***
I'm not staying here.
With that thought in mind, (Y/n) tiredly looked around the room she was in and pursed her lips.
She didn't want to be here.
She didn't want to stay here on her own.
The only reason (Y/n) had managed to stay here last night was because she had been dosed up on morphine which knocked her off her senses. She had become coherent enough this morning to realise she was in the hospital.
She was in a small room on her own. Eddie wasn't here. He was somewhere on this floor, in this ward, but he wasn't here. (Y/n) couldn't sleep on her own. She couldn't stand being anywhere on her own and right now, she was alone at night. Evan and Maddie had visited her and stayed with her until the nurses told them they had to leave and come back in the morning.
None of the nurses listened when Maddie told them (Y/n) was liable to try and leave. They thought she was too hyped up on morphine to try and leave, but that was what she was going to do.
Everyone who had been to visit her today had told her Eddie was okay. He had recovered from surgery, his shoulder joint hadn't been hit by the sniper, it was just the muscle that got damaged. Eddie was awake and on the same pain meds as she was and (Y/n) knew Chris was safe at home. And Evan was staying at their house so Chris didn't have to leave the comfort of home so he would feel better without his parents there.
Her hands moved to her face and she brushed away the tears she had been shedding for the last half an hour. All (Y/n) had done since her siblings left was cry. She hated being alone. She couldn't sleep alone at night. The only reason she slept at home when Eddie was on a night shift was knowing that Chris was in the next room.
"I want Eddie."
If she didn't see him, she was going to go insane.
All (Y/n) could see when she closed her eyes was the image of Eddie on the floor with a mixture of their combined blood mingling together against the concrete. How would she know if he was truly okay if she didn't see him with her own eyes?
How did she know her friends and family weren't just lying to her to keep her calm?
Sitting herself up, (Y/n) looked down at the IV line capped into her left hand as she took deep breaths to stop herself from crying. With minimal effort, she paused the IV machine and twisted the cap until it disconnected from the needle in her wrist. She could easily reattach it whenever she decided to come back to this room later.
It took some effort for her to swing her legs over the side of the bed and (Y/n) grimaced at the hospital gown she was wearing.
Maddie promised to bring her and Eddie some of their own clothes tomorrow when she came down to visit them.
The moment her feet touched the floor, (Y/n) grimaced. The morphine didn't take all the pain away. Granted, it had done yesterday, but recovering from the anaesthetic probably helped numb everything else.
When she was up on her feet, (Y/n) stretched both arms out and hobbled over to the wall. She planted her hands down on the wall, lifted her right leg until her toes barely scraped the floor, and started to hop. It was a lot of effort and her stomach churned and twisted, but she had to persevere.
She had to find Eddie.
More tears stained her face as she quietly opened the door and hobbled out. It felt like she was a cripple with only one leg. Her right leg was practically useless in this state anyway and the nurses hadn't found her a walker or any crutches yet. They were supposed to be trying to get (Y/n) up and out of bed tomorrow, but she needed to move around now so she could find her husband.
(Y/n) crossed to the other side of the corridor so she was leaning on the wall on her right. Her shoulder and arm pinned into the wall as if she was about to slouch down to the floor and she hopped and shuffled along, trying not to make a sound so no one noticed. She could always say she was going to the bathroom if anyone asked.
Her eyes squinted in the dim light to read the names written in whiteboard marker outside each room.
She scanned along them and passed about five different rooms until her heart jumped into her throat and her eyes locked on a familiar name.
Diaz.
Here he was. She'd found him.
Her teeth sank down in her lower lip as she dragged her limp, useless leg behind her and crossed to the room opposite. She was relieved Eddie wasn't on a ward. It wouldn't do her any favours to be sneaking into the men's ward in the middle of the night when she didn't know who else would be in there.
She opened the door as quietly as she could and peeked her head round. (Y/n) wasn't sure what she thought she was going to see. Maybe she thought Eddie would somehow get visitors to stay through the night with him whereas she wouldn't. Or maybe she thought he wouldn't actually be in here, that this was a mistake and something had happened to him like she dreaded.
But when she hobbled over the threshold and looked ahead, her stomach started to flutter with adrenaline and she scratched her hand across her neck to remind herself to breathe.
There he was. He didn't look comfy. It wasn't like Eddie to sleep on his back, it wasn't something he did. When they were at home (Y/n) was used to him laying in funny positions with one leg hanging off the bed or she would wake in the morning to have him wrapped around her like a second blanket.
But here Eddie was, laid uncomfortably on his back with his right arm pinned to his chest in a sling. He had pushed the cover down so it barely covered his knees and he had his good arm flopped above his head on the pillow.
(Y/n) knew he was a light sleeper so she turned and shut the door with a little pressure to wake him rather than stand beside him and frighten him awake.
His head snapped forward within a second and he groaned, clicking his neck from left to right while his eyes adjusted to the dim light seeping in from the corridor.
"Baby?" Eddie's voice was gruff and deep. He lifted his arm from the pillow and dragged his hand across his eyes to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Before he moved to look at his left arm. He wasn't connected to an IV; they took him off it just before he went to sleep and said they would start him on another one in the morning.
He wasn't dosed on morphine anymore, conjuring up the image of his wife in front of him to make himself feel better. So why was she here? She should be back in her own room. Resting. Safe and sound until one of the nurses finally listened to Eddie's beligerent badgering about taking him down to see his wife.
"Baby… what are you doing?"
He pushed himself up so he was sitting up in bed, rubbing at his stiff neck before he squinted at her through his lashes. He watched her drag her fingers across her neck and over her chest; something he recognised as a nervous habit.
When she tried to step forward, she noted the way Eddie took a sharp breath. She could barely walk. She was limping and she had to reach out and grab the bed frame to hold herself up.
"I got lonely," (Y/n)'s voice was meek and timid but she tried to smile. She didn't want to be in that room on her own any longer. Why couldn't she be in the same room as Eddie? They were both patients with similar injuries. And they were both more liable to stay and listen to the doctor's orders if they were together and comfortable instead of separated and panicked.
She watched Eddie's eyes rake up and down her frame, but it was the way his lips pulled into a deep frown and his eyes narrowed on her that made (Y/n) shrink in on herself and wince.
"Jesus baby, you shouldn't be walking about! You could hurt yourself, you know that?"
"I can't sleep on my own." She tried to keep her tone light and force herself to smile, but Eddie's stern expression and his demanding voice made her stomach twist.
"You could tear your stitches or burst a blood vessel if you're not careful. Baby you can't-"
"I'm scared."
A tremor rattled through Eddie's chest and caused a sharp pain to strike his heart when he realised (Y/n)'s eyes were watering. He could feel his lungs shrivelling up in his chest and his shoulders sagged, despite the pain it caused.
She didn't want to be on her own. Not when being apart from Eddie meant she had nightmares that he didn't get here in time. She had to see him, touch him, be with him to convince herself that he was okay. Being on her own left her mind free to torment her. To see Eddie drop down in a pool of blood. To feel her leg ache and pound like it was going to fall off. To have her hands cradling her stomach, fretting that she was going to lose their baby.
It was too scary to be alone. (Y/n) wanted company; she wanted Eddie.
(Y/n) was torn between wanting to run forward and wanting to leave if Eddie was going to be mad with her. But her watering eyes widened when Eddie threw the cover to one side and waved his good hand towards her.
"Get in here."
As soon as she was within reach, Eddie curled his good arm around (Y/n)'s waist and helped her ease down onto the bed. He laid down and pulled her with him, suddenly feeling his own sense of peace when they laid down together. This was why he couldn't settle early in the morning when the drugs wore off. This was why Eddie felt uncomfortable all day and got irritable when any visitor walked through the door. They weren't (Y/n). He wasn't whole without her.
He turned his head to the left and smothered his nose and lips against the top of her head, breathing in her scent like it was the most addictive drug in the hospital.
He felt her head snuggle down into his chest and she bound her arm around his torso, clinging to him like someone was suddenly going to walk in and tear her out of his arms. He wouldn't let them. He wouldn't let anyone take her away from him; especially not if she was frightened.
"Do you feel okay? All I got off Buck was 'she's fine, she's fine' and that didn't really wash well with me."
They had run Eddie through what had happened and told him where (Y/n) had been shot because he remembered she was hurt, but he didn't remember where. It was a relief to know the bullet went in her leg. Any higher and it could have hit a vital organ. Any higher and it would have hit the baby.
But no one would tell Eddie much because at first he wasn't lucid enough and then he tried to leave the room when he wasn't allowed. He was promised he could see her tomorrow, but holding her tonight was so much better.
"Just achy… my thigh stings a bit, but it's okay. How about you?" (Y/n) tilted her head up and nuzzled her face into Eddie's neck so she could be closer to him.
Her lips attached to his neck and she pressed a tender kiss there just beneath the stubble that was starting to grow in.
"It's familiar, being used to it helps. And it didn't hit the bone, thank God." It was strange to think that he was used to the feeling of being shot. Eddie didn't think it was a feeling he would ever have to have again after he left the army.
But having some experience with this feeling definitely helped. He knew how to avoid the pain and how to push through it, and he thanked God that his shoulder joint had been missed. He couldn't be dealing with more operations or physio and time off work to try and patch it back together. And he had to recover so he could hold his baby girl without a struggle when she arrived.
With that thought in mind, Eddie carefully slid his hand over from (Y/n)'s hip until his fingers grazed along her stomach. His touch was light and delicate at first, but when (Y/n) didn't wince or groan or pull away, he pressed his palm down over her gown so he could cup her stomach.
"How's she doing?"
"Her heartbeat settled down this afternoon after the shock wore off… I haven't lost any fluid, and she keeps kicking me. They think she's gonna be fine."
Maddie had made her smile when she said (Y/n) was now special. Rather than bi-weekly checks, for the past two days (Y/n) had been getting almost hourly checks on the baby. When her heartbeat evened out this afternoon, they made a note of it.
Since the placenta and baby were still in place and her vitals were fine and (Y/n) hadn't lost any fluid, they were confident the baby was going to be just fine. But (Y/n) could still have checks throughout the day until she left, and she would be on close monitoring when she was discharged.
"Good, you had me worried."
"Me? What about you, you scared me Eddie. I thought- I thought…" (Y/n) knew exactly what she thought, but she didn't have the willpower to voice it.
She didn't want to say it outloud. It was hard enough to admit to herself that she thought Eddie wasn't going to make it to the hospital. The thought of having to go through life without Eddie wasn't something (Y/n) could contemplate.
She couldn't bring up Chris on her own. She couldn't go through labour and have this baby without him. (Y/n) couldn't do any of that without Eddie by her side.
Her lips rolled together tightly to stop herself from crying and she smothered her face in the side of his neck when his arm tightened around her waist. She could feel his fingers feathering up and down her stomach and he tilted his head to the side so he could kiss the top of her head.
"It's gonna take more than a bullet to take me away from you."
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jinnie-ret · 3 months
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stray kids x ninth member male!reader
genre: angst, fluff
content warnings: implied anxiety, implied disassociating
word count: 2.1k
summary: he's going through voice changes in their debut era and fans are already sending in hate
Requested: anon!
This is my first male!reader fic so please be kind, I hope you enjoy! <3
1K FOLLOWERS PLAYLIST 💚🖤
MAIN MASTERLIST
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He was so excited to finally be a part of something, not that he had been training for long. But when Bang Chan told him he saw potential in him, despite their 6 year age gap, and recognised how well he got on with the other members, he was quickly added onto the line up for Stray Kids.
During the survival show, Y/N was babied, of course he was, the maknae in the upcoming JYP boy group. Fans of the show fauned over his fluffy black hair and the oversized hoodies he'd wear, making him look smaller. It was similar to how Jeongin was babied too, the two of them being the youngest and seen to have that sweet, innocent air around them. Plus, for Y/N's case, his voice hadn't broken yet at the age of 14, so that fed more into how he was perceived by fans.
However, it was not long after the group had finally debuted that a more mature, deeper voice had overcome him. Of course, not without the struggles of getting used to it. Originally singing the chorus of District 9 wasn't difficult, in fact it was easy. His gorgeous, husky tone was unique yet when he hit those high notes his voice was instantly recognisable. Now, he had to deal with voice cracks, and the rapidly depleting self-esteem that came along with it. This is what he trained to do after all.
"You're getting stressed out. We need to practice getting your voice in a position where it can hit those high notes again. It's not going to help if you're standing there thinking you can't do it," the vocal teacher sighed, putting down her sheets of the lyrics Y/N had been singing.
She was firm, yes, but she was being kind about the situation too. She has coached many that had gone through the same thing as Y/N, and all she wanted to do was to see him succeed, but he couldn't see things through her eyes, that was far too big of a mountain to climb for him. A treacherous journey to realising not everything is one dimensional.
Y/N could only focus on those last four words. 'You can't do it'. And he hated the way that everything suddenly felt hot, and how his throat itched. How his neck itched. He started subconsciously scratching lightly at his neck, feeling the stress flood through his body. He scratched away at the thing he wanted to change most, knowing he couldn't turn back time and have things stay the way they were.
All the comments he had read, all the whispers he had heard, circulating in his brain, like an endless loop of vicious words to bring him down. He would be the reason Stray Kids would fail, they had said. He wasn't good enough, they had said. It all came from jealous trainees that were bitter they didn't get to debut instead of him. The only failure apparent in this situation was Y/N realising that.
"I need some air," Y/N barely managed to speak as he rushed out of the small practice room, tugging at the strings of his hoodie and making his way outside.
Fresh air.
Just breathe, Y/N.
And he managed to do so, not without his mind taking him to another place as he stared up at the JYP sign on the building. Was he meant to be here? Did he deserve to be here when his talents were no longer there? Y/N just couldn't see it the same way anymore, he couldn't see himself the same way anymore when the thing he had been praised for so deeply had changed. Even the people who had supported him before had changed their opinions, because his growth had shattered the image they had of him.
Y/N was unaware of the familiar presence beside him, one that had playfully called out his name before realising something was wrong. He was gently guided back into the building, and swiftly surrounded by the warmth of the 3RACHA studio.
"Hyungs! I found Y/N but he's not talking to me," Jisung's voice quivered as he himself was now feeling worried about his dongsaeng.
Changbin took Jisung aside, hushing him and reassuring him that he did the right thing, whilst Chan took it upon himself to understand what was happening to his youngest brother.
"Hey, hey, you're ok, come on, look at me," Chan spoke quietly, yet he managed to break through Y/N's mind as the younger looked around the studio.
"I shouldn't even be here," Y/N shook his head, voice monotonous. Just being there upset him further, yet he still fought against everything within him to show that side.
"What do you mean? This is our studio of course you're allowed in here, I mean, I know Channie likes his own space sometimes but this is different," Changbin moved to stand in front of Y/N too, having successfully calming Han, "hey, no no no don't float away again, I need you to listen," Changbin forced Y/N to sit down in the sofa. Han automatically wrapped his arms around the younger, wanting to do his best to show he was there for his fellow member.
"What's going on Y/N? Your vocal teacher said you just ran out of the building. She was waiting another 45 minutes until Seungmin turned up for his lesson because she couldn't find you," Chan sighed as he sat down in his chair, opposite the distressed boy.
"I bet Seungmin was much better than me," Y/N mumbled, but even with that, throat thick in emotion, his voice cracked yet again. Flustered that it had happened yet again, Y/N's fist came down against his own leg, huffing in frustration.
"Yah yah, don't do that!" Han frowned, pulling Y/N's arms away from him.
"I'm just so frustrated!" Y/N spoke through gritted teeth, looking up at the ceiling to keep his tears at bay.
"About what?" Changbin prompted Y/N further but he just stayed quiet.
"You need to tell us ok, we're your hyungs, we want to know what's going on, we need to know," Chan moved closer, resting his hand on Y/N's knee.
"My stupid voice," Y/N whispered, embarrassed to admit it.
"What?"
"Huh?"
"What about it?"
"Ever since it's broken, you know, gotten deeper, I just sound stupid when I try singing, it's embarrassing, I mean, it makes sense when they say I shouldn't even be in the group anymore, I-" Y/N opened the gates to his mind as his mini ramble began and was quickly cut off.
"Who said that..." Changbin frowned deeply.
"Stays, other trainees," Y/N threw his hands up in the air, just done with the whole situation.
"Trainees are saying it too?!" Han gasped, looking at Chan and Changbin worriedly, a hint of malice in his eyes as he thought about all of those around them that still acted like their friends.
"Y/N they're just jealous, you can't listen to what they say," Chan began, sighing once more as he ran his fingers through his hair, somewhat at a loss of how to reassure Y/N anymore.
"Easier said than done. Why did you even have me join this group when, when... when I was just going to make us fail!" Y/N exploded, pushing himself up from the sofa and out of Han's arms, away from Changbin's concerned glances and especially away from Chan's words which went in one ear and out the other straight away.
It wasn't long until he found what he thought was an empty practice room, not noticing the bags of his other hyungs that were for once tucked away neatly in the corner of the room. He found solace in the emptiness and allowed himself to collapse to his knees, breaking down into tears of frustration, sadness and all the other emotions he kept pent up.
The rest of Stray Kids returned from a small snack break at the vending machine, all going together of course, you wouldn't find one Stray Kid without another, even this early on in their time of being together.
"Hey hey hey, aegi, what's going on? Omo..." Lee Know gasped as he saw the baby of the group shaking and sobbing. He ran up to Y/N and wrapped his arms around him, the other members astonished until 3RACHA ran in and finally found Y/N after hearing the commotion.
They began to explain what happened to Hyunjin, Seungmin and Jeongin whilst Felix sat down in front of Y/N to help calm him down, brushing his hair out of his face and rubbing his leg soothingly. He tried his best to listen to Y/N at first but due to his growing knowledge of Korean not being up to par with Y/N's incoherent sobs, it was easier to stick to physical affection. You could say Y/N was in a Lee sandwich, the best place he could be right now.
"Can't... Shouldn't..." Y/N sobs soon calmed down and the rest of his members gathered around him in a semicircle, Minho still hugging him from behind. Yes, he could come across as cold and brash sometimes, but no one could tell you just how soft Minho really was apart from his members. They knew him the best.
"Y/Nnie... please you have to listen to us, you're in this group for a reason," Hyunjin patted his knee from beside him.
"T-they didn't say anything about Jeongin's voice when his broke!" Y/N exclaimed, pain clearly still there, tired of all the judgement he had been receiving. He wasn't able to listen to his hyungs right now.
And the boys go quiet not knowing what to say back to Y/N, they were sure he didn't mean to offend Jeongin but it didn't stop Seungmin from patting his shoulder in support.
"Not, not, oh gosh not that I wanted Jeonginnie hyung to get hate I'd never want that for my hyungs I just..." Y/N put his face into his hands, feeling bad as if he has indirectly insulted his hyung, just because he was feeling hurt. From behind him, Minho hugged him tighter, whispering in his ear to try and gain his attention.
"It's ok, I know you didn't mean it like that," Jeongin smiles from across him, and Y/N could tell it was a genuine one.
"Look, our vocal teacher said something to me earlier about what was going on, she was worried about you, she thought she said something wrong," Seungmin trailed off, trying to get to the bottom of the matter.
"No she was actually really nice about it, it was just too much of a reality check and then my mind just took control and... Ugh I don't even know," Y/N came to a realisation that his vocal teacher wasn't being rude to him and it was all these overwhelming feelings that had built up and caught him out.
"Just take a moment, yeah, and think, would I have added you to this group if I didn't think you had the talent, had the potential," Chan rose an eyebrow, firmly talking to Y/N to make sure he understood what he was saying.
"Or his personality, personality is important too," Felix piped up, not wanting Y/N to feel like his worth was only reduced down to one thing.
"Of course it is, but that isn't what this is about right now, answer me, Y/N," Chan nodded to Felix before looking back at his upset member.
"N-no..." Y/N stuttered, realising the depth of what his leader was saying.
"Good. We can see how good you are. The only reason fans are getting annoyed is because it's a change they haven't adjusted to yet. Just like you're adjusting to this change too. Now, they shouldn't be sending in hate, so please, I will do everything it takes for you to not listen to it anymore, ok?" Chan promised Y/N, sitting in front of him and making sure he got that one answer he needed.
"O-ok, I-i understand now, thanks hyung, I-i love you all," Y/N felt the stress leave him, finally able to understand things from a different perspective.
"Aww he said he loves us!" Minho suddenly picks up Y/N and spins him around, causing the younger boy to squeal.
"I wish I had a camera!" Seungmin laughed along.
"I need to remember this forever," Jeongin and Han fooled around, widening their eyes and pretending to screenshot this happy cute moment into their brains.
It was definitely a moment that Y/N would be teased about in the future, being exposed for his true feelings for his hyungs when normally he'd be quiet about what he thought about in the normal way. It was just a good thing they got in his head this time, because now they had a happy memory to think about instead.
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tagged: @skz-streamer @kiraisastay @hannahhbahng @kpopmenace143 @sakufilms @arloo00 @dunno-wut-to-do @splat00z @cheesemonky @his-angell @turtledove824 @2minstan @royal-shinigami @yangbbokari @skzoologist @crabrangoongirl25 @atinyniki @writingforstraykids @minholing @lilmisssona @astraysimp @lixie-phoria
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marymary-diva17 · 3 months
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He your son your idiot (2)
loak x mom reader + sully family and others
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The marriage and promise that you held so dear, had been broken when your spouses started picking favorites that affected the family. Soon your son had been sent away from home and everything he knew, as your husband and wife, wouldn't hear him out and sent their so-called problem away. Nothing after that day was the same for the once close sully family.
y/n " where could he be did he get on the plane or maybe his plane was delayed or canceled" once again you are at the airport as you are waiting for your son flight, loa'k had come home for vacation and you are so happy.
Announcer " flight 2347 has arrived and will be docking at gate 30" a smile had grown on your face as that is lo'ak flight.
y/n " oh thank you great mother" you are waiting as all the passengers from many planes were, walking towards the waiting area.
????? " mama"
y/n " lo'ak" you soon saw your son as he made his way towards you, soon hugging you once she reached you.
y/n " oh my baby boy you have changed so much"
lo'ak " mama I'm still the same since our last facetime call yesterday and our meeting two months ago"
y/n " I know but look at your hair it changed since the last time I saw you"
lo'ak " well my friends said I could use a makeover"
y/n " well I love it now it see it more in person verse on phone"
lo'ak " thanks I have so many things to tell you mama and some documents the School wishes for you to look over and sign"
y/n " well we can do that when we get home now come on lets get you home" lo'ak had nodded his head as the mother and son soon left the airport and went to the parking lot, putting lo'ak suitcase once they got them into the car. Soon the pair were heading home while talking and listening to music.
lo'ak " so mama how is everything going on between you and them"
y/n " well it been okay since I moved out of the house and brought my own place, that not that far from them for your siblings to come see me"
lo'ak " that good to know grandpa has his own opinion on Jake and neytiri right now"
y/n " yes I had that phone call with him he offer to pay for a divcore lawyer and for me to come move there as well"
lo'ak " oh really"
y/n " yes after he had been told the whole story he not the biggest fan of Jake and neytiri, I don't think he even likes them anymore"
lo'ak " well we all have our own opinions on them"
y/n " what are your opinions"
lo'ak " I'm going to be civil towards but I might not like them that much, as they basically sent me away without asking you oh yes they didn't come see me as well"
y/n " yes I tried getting them to come in hopes of making everything better but no it failed"
lo'ak " what about my siblings and their friends"
y/n " I tried getting them to talk with you but Jake and neytiri got made at me, leading to another fight and then there ronal and tonowari who might not like me ... tsu'tey and norm might not see me in good light right now"
y/n " when I went to see you I asked them if they wish to come, I think they might of wish to come but Jake and neytiri said no and schooling and other stuff"
lo'ak " that okay don't you work at the same lab as norm"
y/n " oh well last week I got a promotion so I work on different lab"
lo'ak " that wonderful mama"
y/n " thank you so what about you and reya"
lo'ak " she stopped talking with me I don't know if she made that choice or her moms did, but I will respect her wishes if she doesn't wish to see or speak to me I will repost that same with everyone else"
y/n " well that very mature of you that good has been doing well and so has our family"
lo'ak " thank you for the care packages I love the keychain tuk made me along with frames, pencil holders and the stuff grandma sent me as well was good and remind me of home"
y/n " oh yes tuk spent a good amount of time working on them for you, and your grandma want to make sure you were love and miss... her and neytiri are not on the best of terms right now"
lo'ak " well it good to know I have some people here in my corner" after some driving the car had reached the home lo'ak smile while see the house, he had rather stay here with you verse going to the other house.
y/n " well what are you waiting for go see your new room in person, I made some changes you might like" lo'ak soon race into the home and went to see his room.
lo'ak " it amazing mama I love it"
y/n " I know you will" lo'ak had taken his suitcase upstairs he was so happy to be home, as he spent most of his breaks or vacations where his boarding school was located.
y/n " so you are dating anyone"
lo'ak " nope there are some girls that seem to have a crush on me, but I haven't ask if It true yet"
y/n " oh"
lo'ak " here let me show you some of my awards and metals I got at school"
y/n " oh yes I will love to see them" lo'ak soon raced upstairs and brought down a bag and folder, he soon started showing you all his awards and metals.
y/n " wow my boy you have done a amazing job look at all these awards you got for best student and honor roll"
lo'ak " yeah I had some teachers that saw what I can do and helped me"
y/n " I knew you were meant to do great stuff"
lo'ak " thanks mama I even won some trophies with my team, I have been doing a great job there mama and made new friends and have a image there good and health"
y/n " well I'm happy you are happy my love" lo'ak smile as your hugged him he had changed greatly over this time, and now became his own person. The moment had ended when the door bell rang getting the mother and son attention.
y/n " well that is Jake calling right now"
phone call convention
Jake " hey"
y/n " hey"
Jake " I came here to see if lo'ak had gotten in or is he coming in later maybe we can go get him together as a family as it been so long since I last saw him... we can go get everyone else at the house and go pick him up and maybe get dinner"
y/n " well that nice of you Jake I have dealt with lo'ak pick up already no need to worry"
Jake " good I have some news that you can share with him or me our family is going on a trip along with tonowari and ronal their children, there will also be norm and tsutey with spider as well"
Jake " this trip will be good for everyone and hey something amazing might happen"
y/n " yeah well I will give the kids a call tell neytiri I say hello"
Jake " oh sure I will text you when we will leave"
y/n " thank you bye Jake"
Jake " bye"
end of phone call
lo'ak " mama you have more will power then I will ever have in my life"
y/n " it something you learn my boy"
Day of departure of trip
lo'ak " let hope this trip goes well"
y/n " yes lets hope because I can't stand a week or longer with grown adults acting like children"
lo'ak " well I finally get to see everyone else again after being away for so long"
y/n " yeah there the bright side"
lo'ak " how are you going to deal with Jake and neytiri"
y/n " like a mature adult act civil towards them and not lose my cool in front of you and your siblings, as we don't need anymore stress on this family"
lo'ak " that good grandfather said a divorce will be better but that him"
y/n " yes that your grandfather now come on and no divorce talk near tuk, she still has hope everything will be okay"
lo'ak " understand"
y/n " good now come on get in the car we have to meet at the house with everyone else" lo'ak had nodded his head and soon got his stuff in the car that will be his suitcase, and backpack with stuff to keep him entertained during the drive and trip.
lo'ak " well the house looks good with some changes ... oh there is everyone else" lo'ak was looking at his siblings and their friends as they were standing outside, and the adults were not that far away.
y/n " you can do this you come from a family of mighty and powerful people, you will not let others drag you down anymore show them what you have become"
lo'ak " yes mama" you had soon got out of the car as the teens and tuk looked towards you.
tuk " mama you are here"
y/n " hey baby girl I will not miss a trip with all my wonderful children"
neteyam " hey mama you are here cool now the trip can start"
y/n " yes and I have a feeling this trip will be eventful"
kiri " hey mama who that in the car"
y/n " oh yes give him a moment he will out soon"
the kids " him" soon the passenger side car door had open and out step lo'ak he soon made his way towards the others.
y/n " present the new lo'ak"
lo'ak " hello everyone no hugs" the boy had removed his sunglass showing his face, he had changed so much it took everyone a long time to respond.
tuk " lo'ak" tuk soon ran and hugged her brother happy to see him.
lo'ak " hey tuk tuk it good to see you"
spider " dam bro you had a major transformation what happened"
lo'ak " my school it changed me"
neteyam " hey baby bro it good to have you wait are you coming on the trip with us"
tsireya " that will be amazing we have so much to tell you and maybe you have stoires to share as well"
lo'ak " yeah I'm coming"
kiri " sweet that cool to have you back with us as the previous trips without haven't been fun"
rotxo " yeah kiri right when did you get back"
lo'ak " two days ago"
neteyam " wait why didn't you tell us mama"
y/n " relax kids you brother had some things that need to be done, so we were not able to come by at the moment"
neteyam " oh well it good to have you here now"
Jake " y/n you are finally here is lo'ak in town or do we ned to make a stop at the airport ... lo'ak"
lo'ak " hey sir"
neytiri " lo'ak is that you"
lo'ak " yes it me ma'am good to see you two again" soon tonowari and ronal had come along with tsutey and norm all four adults looked shocked.
norm " wow lo'ak I didn't think school will change you that much"
lo'ak " a new look was asked about and given"
tsu'tey " well it good to have you back as all the kids missed you"
lo'ak " oh did they well it good to be back"
tonowari " hello young man"
lo'ak " tonowari sir it good to see you and your wife again, and you don't have to worry I will not be causing any drama or trouble for you family or anyone else I have changed for the better ... the school and programs helped me"
ronal " oh that good to know"
Jake " well you can park you car in the driveway and we can get you and lo'ak stuff in the car and leave"
y/n " thank you for the offer Jake but I and lo'ak will be traveling in my car giving everyone much need space on the family car, as it seems it already busy in there"
Jake " oh we can switch some stuff around"
y/n " no it will be okay don't worry yourself it will be fine"
Jake " yes you are right"
aonung " that mean we will not have the time to caught up with lo'ak"
lo'ak " we can text or call during the car ride or wait until we reach our vacation spot"
neteyam " sure"
tuk " mama can I ride with you and lo'ak it will be fun"
neytiri " tuk we already got you car seat in there"
tuk " but mommy I haven't seen lo'ak I so long"
y/n " let me a deal if you go with your mom and dad there I will have desert with you tonight"
tuk " really"
y/n " yes really and I will pay my treat for all you kids"
tuk " okay mama I will be good"
neteyam " I will make sure she behave mama and hey lo'ak I started a new group chat with us all"
lo'ak " cool"
tonowari " well come on everyone lets get going we should be hitting the road" everyone soon got into their cars that were already set up, soon the everyone started heading on the road. The mother and son looked at each other knowing this was going to be a long trip, and very long vacation. The vacation might be good and bad for everyone when it comes to defending everyone relationships
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jokeringcutio · 5 months
Text
Stepdad!William Afton x Reader "Barbecue" - Mature/Drabble [ 1 ]
FNAF | William Afton (stepdad!) x (f) Reader | MATURE Warnings: Mention of arousal, Jealousy. AN: Wrote a quick drabble. For my Grabber fans, he is my favorite neighbor to crossover with (: Enjoy.
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The sun beat down on your exposed skin as you stood in the backyard, the scent of sizzling meat filling the air. You were dressed to impress, hot pants hugging your curves and a tight top that left little to the imagination. Your neighbor Mr. Shaw manned the barbecue, his chestnut hair cascading down to his shoulders, the roots already touched by grey revealing his age.
"Great day for a barbecue," he smiled at you, his eyes twinkling with warmth.
"Absolutely," you agreed. You came to stand next to him, hungrily trying to have a peek to see if anything your taste was being put on there.
The conversation was casual and rather dull at first, with Mr. Shaw talking and you smiling kindly while listening and asking polite questions.
You hadn’t been much in the mood for this barbecue, but you didn’t want to disappoint your parents. Your stepfather was an intimidating man, always criticizing you. You tried your best not to irk him, to be polite and kind when around him. All you wanted was to have him praise you, even if it would only be once, and call you a good girl.
You just wanted his approval.
You felt the weight of your stepfather's gaze upon you from across the garden. William Afton, the man your mother had remarried not too long ago, was watching you intently. It seemed as if he was watching you most of the time these days, his scrutinizing eyes following your movements across the lawn.
You were doing your best to be the perfect stepdaughter, to get him to like you. You dressed up nicely and were socializing with his friends. What was it that you were doing wrong that he watched you like a hawk?
Mr. Shaw started telling you about his side job as a magician, catching your interest and distracting you from your stepdad’s watchful gaze. You couldn't help but let your enthusiasm show. His tales of dazzling tricks and spellbound audiences drew you in, and you found yourself leaning closer, eager to learn more.
"Really? And then what happened?" you asked, caught up in the excitement of it all.
But your stepdad had other ideas. In an instant, William was beside you, gripping your arm with a force that made you wince.
"Excuse us, Albert," he said through gritted teeth before dragging you into the house.
You stumbled along, trying to keep up with his angry strides. You didn’t miss how he led you into a room far enough from the party to ensure privacy before slamming the door shut behind you. Confused, you looked up at him.
There was a harshness in his eyes that for a moment seemed to flicker. As if your innocent eyes angered him even more.
"What do you think you're doing?" he spat, his voice harsh and cold.
"Talking to Mr. Shaw?" you answered hesitantly, unsure of where this hostility was coming from.
"Keep your distance from him," William growled, his fingers digging into your arm. "He's old enough to be your father."
Your stepdad’s words puzzled you. Keep your distance? Less than an hour ago he had wanted you to step up to them, had been lecturing you about it.
"But you're friends with him!" you protested, trying to make sense of your stepdad's sudden change in demeanor.
"That's different," he snapped. "Stay away from him, understand?"
"Fine," you muttered, your heart racing with confusion and fear. "I didn't mean to upset you," you murmured, searching his face for answers.
His touch lingered on your arm, and you felt a shiver run down your spine. You slowly became aware that he was deliberately finding excuses to touch you. When you passed each other in the hallway, his arm would accidentally brush past yours. When you needed to get to college in the morning, his hands would linger on the lunch he had prepared for you.
You knew exactly how his fingers felt.
The texture of his skin, the roughness of his palms, the warmth they exuded. You knew it, because he kept brushing his hands past your bare skin – whenever your shirt had no sleeves or whenever it slid down your arm to reveal your shoulder.
"Older men like him, they only think of one thing," William said, feigning concern. "Pretty young girl like you…” you saw him press his lips into a thin line, thinking before he spoke again. “I just want to protect you. Even though I'm not your real dad."
His words made him sound like the concerned father figure, but something in his eyes betrayed him. You saw through his act, recognizing the jealousy simmering beneath the surface.
"Okay, Dad," you whispered, meekly apologizing. "I promise to behave better."
The way you called him 'Dad' seemed to ignite something within him. His grip tightened, and you could swear you saw a hint of arousal in his eyes. With that realization, you made a silent vow to test your theory. Could it be that your stepfather had the hots for you?
"Thank you," he said, releasing you. "Now, go back outside and enjoy the party. But remember, no boys."
You locked eyes with him, searching for an answer to the many questions that swirled inside your head. “No boys,” you promised, thinking that Mr. Shaw was, after all, a man.
Not a boy.
You returned to the garden, feeling his gaze on your back as you went. The sun still shone brightly, casting long shadows on the grass. Laughter from the guests mingled with the sizzle of the barbecue. It all felt so normal, yet you couldn't shake off the tension that now wrapped around you like a second skin.
After weighing your options, you slowly made your way back to the food again. Most of the guests here were male. Men around your stepdad’s age. They were his friends mostly, after all. The women had gathered in a corner, your mom included, talking about topics that didn’t interest you at all.
"Are you okay?" Mr. Shaw asked, noticing your return. His kind eyes searched yours, genuine concern etched on his face.
"Of course," you smiled, pushing the unease aside. "Let's talk more about your magic tricks."
You leaned in closer, engrossed by his stories once more. But this time, you kept one eye on your stepfather, watching as he glowered from the sidelines. There was a small gesture of his hand as he stroked the obvious tent in his pants, rearranging himself discreetly, blue eyes still burning upon you.
You leaned a little closer to Mr. Shaw, eager to see your stepdad’s reaction. His eyes darkened, lips clipped. And then he took a step toward you.
You felt a twisted sense of satisfaction at his reaction – now you knew for sure.
"Wow, that's amazing," you said to Mr. Shaw, your voice louder and more enthusiastic than before. "You must be an incredible magician."
"Thank you," he replied, grinning. "I enjoy sharing my passion with others."
“Perhaps you can share your passion with me one day,” you said, aware that your stepfather must have heard every single word.
Mr. Shaw’s movements stilled, his strong hands holding the tongs in mid-air, veins clearly showing. His eyes seemed to darken. He was an attractive man, you noticed. Perhaps you could -
“I’d love to,” his deep and gravelly voice came.
But your eyes were no longer on Mr. Shaw. You couldn't help but notice William's clenched fists and darkened expression as he hurried toward you. This dangerous game was only just beginning, and you were fully aware of the risks. But somehow, that made it all the more enticing.
The moment was fleeting – the sudden grip of William's hand on your arm as he pulled you away from Mr. Shaw once more.
"Sorry to interrupt," he growled, a forced smile plastered on his face. "But I need to talk to my daughter… again."
"Of course," Mr. Shaw said, eyes narrowing slightly in concern.
William led you into the house again, his fingers digging into your flesh. You were certain bruises would form later. The thought, however, made you feel fuzzy on the inside. As if he was somehow marking you as his, and wasn’t that a thrilling thought?
Once inside, he pushed you against the wall, the action making you gasp. You squeezed your legs together involuntarily, your core hot and slick by nasty thoughts. Your stepfather looked powerful like this, dominating. His chest heaved up and down, gritted teeth showing. His blue eyes blazing with anger.
"Didn't I tell you to stay away from him?" he hissed, his breath hot on your face. "You're being a bad girl, deliberately, aren't you?"
"Wh-what do you mean?" you stammered, trying to maintain your composure. His proximity made it difficult to think straight.
"Your outfit," he spat, his gaze scanning over your tight top and hot pants. "It's too revealing. It's like you're inviting him to look at you."
"Thank you, Daddy," you whispered, your voice trembling as you started to talk. But then you caught sight of how his eyes slightly widened at your words, pupils blown.
You continued, "for being concerned about me."
As you slid past him, your fingers brushed against his arm, lingering for just a moment longer than necessary.
Returning to the garden, you decided to join your mom, settling down beside her on a lawn chair. The sun warmed your skin, but you couldn't ignore the heat radiating from William's stare. He watched you intently, his hands gripping the edge of the table as if he could barely contain himself.
But you obliged to his rules, avoiding eye contact with any of your stepdad’s male friends and sitting with the females of the party instead.
The little silly cat-and-mouse game the two of you had played was pushed to the back of your mind as you listened to the conversations around you. Dull as they were, they took away the ache you had started to feel dance between your legs.
Until your stepdad appeared in your vision, placing a glass of freshly made juice before you.
"Here," he said abruptly. "I thought you might be thirsty."
"Thank you," you murmured, meeting his eyes as you brought the straw to your lips. Slowly, deliberately, you sipped the cold liquid, watching the way his pupils dilated with each movement.
"Is everything all right?" your mom asked, oblivious to the tension between you and William.
"Everything's fine," you replied, eyes still locked with his. The air crackled around you, electric with unspoken desire. It was a dangerous dance, a game of control – and you were both playing with fire. ~ AN: For more, follow me (: ~~ Masterlist - Request Box -  Support me on Ko-Fi ~~
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lvmazzy · 7 months
Note
HIII‼️
I was wondering if you could write something about idol reader and Jay, were reader does a sexy dance cover like 'Dream Of You' by Chang Ha on stage and like he gets jealous that your dancing like that for everyone to see but he doesn't want to admit he's jealous. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say💀
- GOOD GIRL
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summary: A sensual dance makes Jay jealous, but he makes you put yourself in your place.
pairing: idol!secret bf!jay x idol!secret gf!reader
word/character count: 4K / 4040
warnings: dirty talk, grammatical errors, profanity, mature content, curse words, reader with being a woman, jealousy, jay being possessive, change of posture and mood, secret relationship, kpop industry...
gender: smut, madure, a little yandere
author's notes: hey anon, thank u for sending this request, I hope it's to your liking, I'm a little rusty, but I did my best haha. I hope everyone is safe and well! Don't forget to leave your feedback, this is very important! 💙
ask: open (✔) x closed ( )
Ever since you made your debut in your girl group, you were always the center of attention. Everyone adored you, cheered you on, and thought you were the "it girl" of your generation. 
No wonder you caught the eye - because of your beauty and talent - of other idols, both female and, for the most part, male. 
You met Jay Park, a member of the talented group Enhypen, at one of the many award ceremonies. His charm was so tempting - you have to confess - that you couldn't resist when he asked for your number. 
A few discreet encounters and suddenly you found yourself in a relationship. Yes, a few months after they met, they became a couple. Of course, everything was secret, as the fans and the company were very strict, but now nothing could keep you apart. 
Today was the day of your solo performance. It was just a stage where you danced, but you had to admit you were nervous. It was something more daring and sensual, something out of your group's style. 
Jay whispered encouraging words earlier in your dressing room. He noticed your nervousness, with cold hands and slight tremors, but this was calmed when he kissed your lips softly. 
Then you found yourself walking onto the stage, taking a deep breath. 
When the music sounded, you were ready. The song chosen was "Dream Of You", so the movements were very daring. 
As the song progressed, you swayed your body in a sensual way and made expressions of seduction. 
Everyone's mouth dropped open, even Jay, who was squirming in his seat. 
A hint of jealousy crept up on him, making him roll his eyes at every comment the members made about how beautiful and sexy you were. 
At that moment, Jay wanted everyone to know how lucky he was to have you and to show that you were only his. 
His jaw was clenched, and a serious expression was on his face. 
Although he was dying of jealousy, a hard-on was building up inside him, and he tried to appear normal or relaxed. 
When your performance was over, Jay ran off to your dressing room, he didn't care about the stairs, he just wanted you. 
When he arrived, he saw you, the most beautiful girl, with your hair messy and sticking to your forehead from sweat, he was definitely in paradise. 
Subtly, he closed the dressing room door and approached with a malicious, possessive look. 
"What's gotten into you?" Jay said softly with his hands on his waist. "You've made a mess of me... look at the state of me." 
"Did you enjoy the presentation?" you replied with a mischievous smile to tease him. 
"Let's say I did, but you were so daring that my companions went crazy. It's a shame that only I can touch you like that." he says, turning you to face him and pressing you against any wall.
Your eyes were clenched shut, and that made you even more excited. You liked teasing him and seeing him like this, so needy, made you feel superior. 
"It wasn't my fault, I just did my job, and you're already needy?" you reply with a pout, at which point Jay attacks your lips fiercely and places a hand on your neck. 
You moan in response and smile during the kiss. He moves his lips down to your collarbone and kisses you teasingly, making you bite your lip in response. 
He moves lower and lower until he stops at your thigh. He opens up a little more, squeezes one of your thighs and lays a long kiss on it, but suddenly stops. 
"What?" you open your eyes in despair at the lack of warmth. 
"You need to learn that you're mine. Be a good girl and convince me." 
"Jay..." 
"Oh, so I guess I'll go back to my lug-" 
"No!... I'm yours...." you say softly. 
"Hmm, you didn't convince me." 
"Fuck Jay, I'm all yours!" you shout at him and in response he gives you a huge, mischievous grin. 
"Good girl." 
That's when he spreads his legs again and drops his panties. Red. His favorite color. 
Without delicacy, Jay takes several bites out of your thigh, and you bury your fingers in his silver hair with your eyes closed, only moans coming out of your mouth. 
"You taste delicious." 
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@lvmazzy , 2023 original
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kairiscorner · 6 months
Text
“promise me you won't change. — kento nanami x reader”
summary: after catching up with you, 10 years after you two first met, nanami feels all weirdly sentimental and... he wishes you can stay as happy as you are, now, even if he isn't the reason why you stayed as amazing, as friendly and optimistic as you were back then in high school. word count: 2,008 (i got carried away) genre: angst.
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he stares into his glass full of sake, the ripples in the drink fanning out as he does nothing but hold the drink. he doesn't feel thirsty, but his mouth is dry; he hasn't felt this way in a while, at least not this strongly. you look over at him and scoot a little closer. "hey, you okay, nanami?" you ask him, hoping he didn't feel too sleepy that he can't go home on his own. his eyelids are hooded and slowly blinks, though he doesn't look drunk, in fact, he hasn't even drank the sake—he's just... kind of out of it. you have no idea what nanami's been up to for the past 10 years, and uncharacteristically of you, you don't ask him right away. you hesitate and drift the conversation to small talk, which you're very aware he still hates.
he's always been the reserved fellow, he'd answer you in a blunt, straightforward way, he would spare as much details about himself as he could, which made it all the more harder for you to connect with him. nanami's golden brown eyes shifted to see you staring at him, with him raising his eyebrows and exhaling as he leaned back on the couch. "...i'm fine." he mumbles out as he lifts the glass to his thin lips.
he looks like a corpse, a ghost even—he's alive, but he's not... living.
you couldn't feel any more pity for him, though you felt guilty for feeling that way because, what did you know about him? you re-enter his life by accident 10 years after high school, and all of a sudden, you seem to care about him enough to take him to a local bar and hope he drinks at least so you don't feel any more crappy about the awkward situation you two are in tonight. you nod without even looking at him and down your drink, sighing as you drank it all in one gulp, wiping away the drops of your drink that was left on your lips. you call for a waiter to get you two more drinks, while nanami ends up staring at you now, and takes in all that'd changed about you. you looked more mature, that was a given; it seemed adulthood didn't plague you as much as it did for him, it was a miracle you even recognized him when you encountered him at that bakery one day. it was his haircut that made you recognize him, strangely enough; the 7:3 ratio was distinguishable in your eyes no matter how nanami styled it.
nanami broke the silence that lingered for a few minutes after the waiter got you two more drinks. "why did you... invite me out tonight?" he asked you with a fatigue in his tone, he was undoubtedly tired from nearly everything, everything, it seemed, except for you. he didn't feel as forced to go with you, it felt like a splash of cool water was thrown in his face when you pulled him out of his daily routine and offered to catch up with him over some drinks at a local bar.
you let out a soft sigh as you lower your glass and looked at him with a gentle smile on your bright face. nanami could never forget that smile, it stuck with him and was buried deep in the recesses of the back of his mind ever since those 10 years had passed—you shone the whole room with that smile, it was contagious; and nanami felt his face getting warmer, not because of the sting of the alcohol, but because of how genuine you seemed to him. "to be honest... i haven't the slightest clue either why i invited you." you admitted shyly, chuckling lowly to yourself as you shook your glass in a circular motion, laughing a little at the irony of it all.
"i guess... i just wanted to see how much things have changed." you uttered softly, and those words struck chords in nanami's heart; chords that played a familiar melody that resounded back to his adolescence with you, one of the only people who really made his time in high school worthwhile and less like hell. "and i can tell, you haven't changed, nanamin. yeah you, uh... kinda look like you could be a dad or someone's uncle now, but... you're still the same kento nanami i knew from high school; the same serious, stern boy who struggled having fun and had a thing for bread. i'm glad you're still you, nanamin; but you're... kinda refined now. is that weird to say?" you ask him, chuckling as the drunkenness settles in, with you taking another sip from your drink as nanami feels his cheeks flush at your words.
you don't even notice his blush, and even if you did, you'd've brushed it off as a flush of drunkenness—but it's not.
nanami leans forward a little and folds his arms over the table, ignoring the weird stickiness of it and brings his small brown eyes up to look at you, who's been staring at him the whole time in a slight, drunk daze.
"...i'm glad you didn't change, either." he mumbles, slowly rubbing at his eyes after he said that, sighing deeply. why did he say that? who was he to say that? after years of not reaching out to you, sweeping under the rug the fact you two were friends, very close friends in fact—forgetting your name sometimes when you both swore to each other to come through for the other if either of you were ever in trouble...
...it probably was to be expected, adolescents never know what real trouble is in the adult world; the awful mundanity of every day life was a subtle trouble that became permanent, with neither of you being able to save the other from it, or the traumas of what transpired in your high school years.
you laughed aloud and set you drink down, oh that laugh of yours... nanami could listen to you laugh all day and night, and he'd never get sick of it—he'd only wanna make you laugh even more, even if it was the stupidest thing to ever laugh at for someone in the right state of mind.
"you're glad i'm still sweet and naive?" you jokingly asked him with a snicker, emptying out your glass as nanami shook his head, maintaining eye contact with you. "not that... i mean... you're still so bright. so eager, so friendly. you're still you." he muttered, feeling a weird heaviness plaguing his heart. it wasn't a curse grabbing onto his chest right now, it was more like an intangible one, a purely emotional one that was his alone—it was a melancholic longing for someone who was right in front of him, you.
"you're... still the person i love. and i wish... you won't ever get hurt again, even if... i can't save you all the time. i want to, though, but..." he mumbled out, with you not hearing since you were already getting a lot more drunk. nanami didn't hope for you to hear it, at least partially—if anything... he hopes you wouldn't change, but not because he confided in your drunk self that he's still in love with you, his closest friend and ally that he regrets never meeting up with, wasting those 10 years without you in his life.
as you call for a waiter to come over and refill your glass, nanami takes your glass away from you, much to your disdain, pays the bill, and helps you up carefully as he takes you out of the bar, calling a cab for the two of you so he could help take you and your drunken self home.
during the cab ride, nanami made sure to keep you warm, to let you rest against him to feel comfortable, and to hold you a little whenever the cab drove over a pothole. he looked at you with such soft eyes as you dozed off, with him brushing the hair away from your face, berating himself for taking this long to see you again when you... you had the courage to talk to him, after all this time.
"...i have the feeling that saving you once won't make up for the 10 years i've spent without you. i want... to be yours." he whispered as he adjusted his coat on you, making up in his mind that he's letting you keep it, no questions asked. nanami managed to get you to your home, he paid attention when you told him where you lived by, should he ever visit you, as you put it. nanami would love to visit you, but... he's scared. he's scared that his first visit may be his last; and that might be too pessimistic of him, but realistically speaking, now that he's revisiting the world of jujutsu sorcery and has a new responsibility over the students at jujutsu high...
...it's not far off that he might never be able to visit you again, that tonight might be your last night together—nobody knows.
you drunkenly told nanami where you kept your spare key, after almost half an hour of you telling him he looks like he skipped 20 years of his life over those 10 years of you two not meeting. nanami sat you down on the couch and made sure you were comfy; surely, you could take care of yourself in the morning. nanami didn't need to overstep any boundaries here—entering your apartment while you were drunk, even to help you in, was already too much in his opinion; he didn't want to invade any more of your privacy.
"wait... aren't you... gonna say good bye?" you mumbled out in a slurred voice, calling out to nanami before he closed the door to your apartment to lock it from the outside, uncertain if he'll ever come back again. his brown eyes dart over to you, stirring over by the couch, groaning and grumbling for him to bid you goodbye. you were always like that, asking him for a farewell every time before you two parted—another thing he regret not giving you before 10 years had passed without ever seeing you until now.
he clutched the doorknob tightly, not wanting to say goodbye; but he owed you this much, more, even. "...good bye." he uttered, as if he felt cuts all over his body when he muttered those two words. you giggled and waved your hand at him with a lopsided grin on your face, telling him, "bye-bye!" as he closed the door and locked it, putting your spare key back where it was.
nanami inhaled the cold evening air and walked down the stairs of your apartment, despite every voice in his mind urging him to go back and to keep you company for the night—to stay with you until morning, care for you if you're hungover, and tell you when you're sober, when you can remember everything, that he loves you.
...but even if he loves you, he can't stay.
he is the same, the same kento nanami; he, who never stayed.
he, who could never stay.
he, who loves you dearly, but can never stay long enough to let you know that.
he, who could never live with himself if you got attached to him again... only to lose him once more, permanently.
if he could at least have things in his life go the way he wants it, for once... he hopes that if he leaves again, permanently or not... you'll live your life in peace, even without him.
"forget me, and be happy... the two things in life i ask for, and won't ever ask for anything more." he mutters to himself as a single tear rolled down his chiseled cheek, and fell down on the ground beneath his feet; a memento of him, which like him... would never be able to stay.
🍞 tags !! @rohansdisciple @meeom @patchi-chi
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Baby It's You (Teen!John Lennon x Teen!Female!Reader)
A/N: Hello! Yes, I'm alive, and yes, I know I haven't posted anything original on this blog in over 3 years, but that's gonna change!
Thank you all for sticking around so long, my life did a 180 about a month or so ago and now I can get back to one of the things I love doing most: giving you all some juicy fanfiction to enjoy!
I've had an influx of enthusiastic followers and readers on my last oneshot ask for more writing, and I will be delivering! I have upcoming Paul and George oneshots underway; but first, I think it's time we show John a little love!
P.S. we'll probably consider this an AU fic since John went to private school, and he is going to school with the reader in this one. Sorry for the lack of authenticity in advance!
Summary: Your friend, John, invites you to the first Fair of the year with the intentions of evolving some spontaneous behaviour within you. You find just the thing there to prove to John just how daring and fun you could be-- and then things go sideways.
WARNINGS: This has been sitting in my notes FOREVER so I wouldn't be surprised if there were typos.
Also, there is a heteronormative behaviour in this fic because of the time it was set in, but I want to disclaim that LOVE IS LOVE and I, in no way, support heteronormative/ anti LGBTQ+ behaviour. Love who you want to love; just be happy doing so<3
Also Also, she is a LONG one like the other oneshot, so I advise you read this when you've got some time on your hands!
Swearing is almost a certainty at this point, but no really mature themes, so a T rating is probably enough for this one.
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It was a hot Friday afternoon, at the very end of the school year; and there were hundreds of telltale signs:
The teacher was well over his curriculum and he sat at his desk reading a book in silence, student-made work was no longer strewn about on the walls, the classroom was humid even with everyone fanning themselves and each other; and the students...
You could tell the students were just dying to get home for the summer.
There were five minutes left on the clock, and you sat at your desk packing your things away. You spent the last hour doodling, but you wanted to be ready to take off as soon as the bell sounded.
As you zipped your bag up, you saw a little flash of white in your peripheral, and when you glanced back at the surface of your desk, you noticed a folded piece of paper-- a note!
You looked around briefly, but no one indicated to you where to pass it, so it had to have been for you.
And if the note was for you, then there was only one person it could have been from.
You unraveled the little piece of paper, revealing the question the paper possessed.
"Fair? Tonight? -yours truly"
That evening in particular, the local fair was going to erect itself in the biggest park in town, and everyone at school was going to be there. What better way to blow off steam at the end of a long year of hard work?
You shook your head at his pathetic complimentary close, your eyes rolling to the back of your head so far they almost didn't come back.
The bell rang, and before you could even consider doing anything else with the note, everyone took off out the door, as did you, knowing fully well "yours truly" was going to be waiting for you at your locker.
As you rounded the corner to the hallway your locker was in, you finally caught glimpse of him. He was leaning against it with his arms crossed, one leg over the other as his eyes wandered the other students for your face; and when your eyes locked, his expressionless mouth couldn't help but tighten upwards.
Perhaps his smile was out of kindness, but it was most likely because he was a jokester, and quite frankly couldn't get enough of teasing you.
And now his target was spotted.
He opened his mouth to speak, but you spoke first. "You know how much I hate how you sign these off, right?"
You presented the note in hand adjacent to your head as your face displayed a disapproving cringe, cheeks pink in mild humiliation.
"John, I only ever get notes written from you, so the flowery signoff is unnecessary," you put the note down, pointing at him with a frown.
"That note-passing was so open! You know if the teacher ever caught something like that, he'd make me read it out loud to the class, surely you know I'd die on the spot, and then my ghost will haunt you until you died too!"
His smile only grew wider at your words, almost as if he'd been betting with himself what your response to all of this was going to be.
"Also, you're not even in my last class," you rambled on, "so how you managed to have it smuggled in beats me."
"Oh, come on, y/n, you know you'd love all the attention you'd get out of something like that," he gestured to the paper, and you shook your head before crumpling it into a ball in your hand and tossing it at his head, to which it bounced off, and then was immediately trampled on as other students hurried down the hallway.
The both of you weren't strangers; you frequented playdates with John as children, and then you went to school together, so you basically watched each other grow up. John, for as long as you'd known him, usually displayed confident and sometimes mischievous behaviour towards others that typically you'd find unappealing for a man to display.
"People thinking I'm with you? That is not the kind of attention I'm after."
Not that you ever found John appealing, in any way. He was your buddy; you tolerated his behaviour. That being said, over the years he started lightening up on the harsher jokes with you, opting for more of a platonic flirt more than anything else, finding it was a less harmless way to poke fun at you.
"And the Fair, John? Really?"
The boy shrugged his hands up to defend his suggestion. "What's so bad about the Fair?!"
You rolled your combination into your locker, and he shifted out of the way so you could get into it better once you got it unlocked.
"Nothing's wrong with going to the Fair. Going to the Fair with you on the other hand..." you tisked at him before reaching into your locker to retrieve what binders and books you had left in there. John never used his locker, so he was just waiting on you.
You tossed your bag up over your shoulder once you shoved your books inside, and before John could interject with an if, and, or but, you put your hand up to silence him.
"You left me lost in that fun house--"
"But that was literally ten ago, y/n!"
"Doesn't mean I'm over it!"
You took the lead towards the exit doors, and John followed suit, searching for the right words to convince you to go with him.
"If you go with me tonight, I'll try to win you a stuffed animal,"
"We're doing bribery now, are we?" You smirked, reaching out for the doors and pushing through until both you and John were outside, standing under the sun. It was nice for once for the sun to have been out from behind the clouds.
"Look, you're just always hanging out with your girlies, and I've got my mates, but they're all going to the fair with other people tonight," John started as you both headed to the sidewalk and began to make your way to your place.
"We never really do spontaneous things anymore, just you and I. And, I don't know, growing up a little might have had something to do with it... but it doesn't mean I'm not still your friend, though. I wanna do things with you."
You took John's words into consideration. One thing you really liked about John was that he was passionate, and poetic. You'd seen this reflected in some of his writing before, and he often discussed with you how much he liked music, and how he dreamed that his poems could very well one day soon become songs...
Now, it's not like he spoke the way he wrote, but his thoughts translated to words so quickly and effortlessly, and he, as a speaker, really made you think twice about what he said because he sounded so sure when he spoke.
"... I suppose we have been distant in terms of having fun. I know I won't be able to win an argument with you that studying every other night together is considered 'fun', even though I think otherwise."
You and John both rounded left down the next street, which happened to be where you lived; the benefits of living a block away from school. Your house was coming up, meaning this conversation had to end soon.
"Y/n, of the two of us, it's you who needs to be more spontaneous. Just say yes and come with me tonight."
At this point, you and John had slowed to a stop and were standing at the end of the driveway, facing one another as you pondered whether tonight was going to be spent inside reading and listening to music, or stimulated by exciting noises and lights while you stuffed your face with Carnival delicacies and treats.
"... If I say yes, will I still get my stuffed animal?" You already knew the response as the smile returned to John's face.
You and John made it to the Fair for 6:30, and it was already full of life; children on the rides screaming their heads off, friends competing in mini games like Ring Toss and Balloon Darts, and the smell of popcorn and candy floss swirled through the air.
As you looked around at all of the rides available, you barely noticed John going out of his way to buy tickets for both you and him for the night. When he returned to you, he tried to see if you were looking at a particular ride. "Anything catching your eye?"
"I feel like they have different stuff this year. Like, that one must be new," you pointed to a group a different rides that you'd never seen before. "Let's look around, and if anything looks interesting enough, I say we go for it."
John bought you enough tickets for you both to ride everything anyways, but you two had all night, and nowhere to be the next day, so you agreed to start at one end of the fair, and work your way through it.
The first ride that caught the attention of either one of yous were the Tea Cups.
"Remember the one time I threw up on you on that ride?" You asked John with a little smile, to which he replied without a beat,
"And then I threw up on you and caused a chain reaction with all of the other kids on the ride?"
You both laughed and cringed at the rather unpleasant memory before John kindly took your elbow and pulled you towards the ride gently, knowing full well that your matured stomachs would be able to handle it now, and your moving feet indicated you weren't objecting the idea of getting on.
"We gotta start the fun somewhere, Love. After you," John presented four tickets to the ride operator, and you chose your favourite colour cup to climb into.
"If you just don't spin the cup, we'll make it out of here safe," you warned John with a joking wagging finger, and he saluted to you respectfully as he closed the hatch to the cup and took a seat next to you.
"Don't worry, we won't meet the same fate as last," he grabbed the wheel at the centre of the cup as if to indicate he was going to steady it the whole time, and you were excited to see how well he'd do; and even more excited to make fun of him when he did a bad job.
The ride shot to life, and as the cups began dancing around in different patterns, you watched in amusement as John tried his very hardest to keep the cup from spinning; his attention sometimes turning to you, and he watched as your hair whipped around your smiling face as the ride threw the both of you around.
Your beating heart was building up adrenaline as the ride spun on. You suddenly threw your hands overtop of John's, and his eyes shot up to you, hands going slack on the wheel, and you took that moment to whip the cup around as hard as you could, the world becoming a blur around you, and your energy within escaping in a bound of squeals and giggles.
John couldn't help but join in, your laughter was contagious, and the excitement he felt seeing you having fun made his heart ache a little, but in a good way.
The ride was over much sooner than the either of you would have liked, the both of you combing your fingers through your hair to appear more presentable as your tea cup came to a complete stop. John opened the door for you, and you both continued on on wobbly legs to see what else the Fair had to offer.
After a few carnival games and slow, paced rides, you finally grab John by the wrist after he suggests doing something you'd rather do later so he didn't take off too far.
"I think we should do the Ferris Wheel, John," You dropped his wrist and pointed to the ride in the distance behind him, his eyes following your gaze to it.
"Come along, then," it was now his turn to grab your wrist, and lead you along.
That was one unspoken rule you had with John: he never held your hand. You weren't sure why, and you didn't really care-- you didn't want to hold his hand. You just always settled on the idea John was really committed to the joke about not wanting to get Cooties; and honestly, you respected his devotion to the joke.
Your wait in line to ride the Ferris Wheel was a short one, and your chest filled with excitement yet again as you and John took your seats and the ride operator strapped you in.
As the ride filled with other people, you and John slowly made your way to the very top of the ride, allowing yourselves to take in the view of the Fair that seemed to stretch forever.
"We really should have done this first so we could have seen everything all at once," you said, peering down at some of the unrecognizable stands and rides surrounding you both. One in particular caught your eye, and it was in the shape of a space ship from those cartoons depicting the future.
"We definitely have to check that one out," you pointed to it, and John nodded his head in agreement.
"It seems to be right by the games and food. We'll grab some candy while we're in the area."
"And...?"
"And I'll win you that prize, yeah yeah yeah, I know what I promised."
The Ferris Wheel then took off, and you and John savoured the ride, watching the sun slowly fall towards the horizon, the most beautiful colours painted across the sky.
"I'm glad you convince me to come with you, Johnny. I'm having loads of fun. Thank you," you didn't shout, just loud enough that John could hear, and he smiled at you.
"Like I said, if anyone needs to be more spontaneous, it's you. If I can fix that in any way, I'll take the chance," you smiled back at his words, turning your full attention back to the sky as the ride began to slow, knowing this moment, like everything else, was going to come to an end.
You and John were on a mission to get over to the space ship, passing by a bunch of other rides and games you pointed to and indicated aloud along the way that they were on your To-Do list that evening.
As you approached what you two initially thought was a ride, you discovered that the rocket was actually just a still building. There were two lines entering the ship, and there were a few people in each line.
One of the Fair Staff was walking by, and John stopped him before he went too far. "Hey, what's this one all about?"
"Cosmic Hearts is a matchmaking activity we just added! You're matched with someone of your preference in the other line anonymously, and you both enter the rocket. You spend two minutes in the dark together, and then you leave together when the doors open, revealing who you've matched with. You can also think of it as a two-way Kissing Booth."
The staff member looked at the both of you before adding on slowly, "established couples usually don't use that one..."
"Oh, you must be mistaken, we're not--" John couldn't even correct the guy before he was walking away again. You looked from John, back to the metal space ship. The guys standing in line weren't bad looking at all.
"... I wouldn't mind spending two minutes in the dark with any of them," you thought aloud, noticing that each person in line had at least one unique physical attractive quality.
"Yeah, well I'd be worried they'd be touchy with you. In the dark and all," John huffed, shaking his head at the picture he painted himself, and you bursted out laughing.
"What, so you're my chaperone now? Going in there is knowing full well you're going to have hands all over you. Maybe I want to be squeezed up a little, Johnny, is there any harm in that?"
"I mean," John's face flushed a rosy pink before shutting his eyes and shaking his head again, as if that was going to stop his imagination from doing what an imagination does.
"That's.. not something I want to picture."
"Well look, you don't have to anymore," you took John's arm and pulled him towards one of the game stalls close by. "But you do have to try to win me that stuffed bear. We all know that's what I came for in the first place."
The distraction you set up was a good one. The game you brought John to was pretty much just Balloon Darts but forest- themed. You watched as John tried his very best to aim his darts, but he just couldn't quite seem to make the mark for that bear.
The fifth round came and went, and John was still slapping more tickets down. You knew it didn't help that John was legally blind and flat-out refused to wear his glasses, but you weren't about to start an argument with him over that.
After John used up the rest of his darts from that round, he looked over at you with frustration and he sighed. "Look, I might just need a quick break," John took the tickets from inside his pocket, and placed them in your hand.
"I'm running to the loo, it's just on the other side of the park, just hang out here, play a round... or four... and see if you're a better shot than me,"
"I'm always a better shot than you, Lenny," you called to him as he disappeared in the crowd, waving back to you as if to acknowledge your cocky response.
You went to turn back to the game, but something stopped you. You took a quick glance over your shoulder, and eyed the lineup at the rocket ship. You couldn't believe how good looking the people in the lineup were, you could only imagine what the mystery people in the second line looked like.
And then John's words from earlier became apparent in your head, statement ringing in your ears.
"Y/n, of the two of us, it's you who needs to be more spontaneous."
You furrowed your brow as you thought about this decision you were about to make. The closest lineup to you wasn't long at all, and before you knew it, your feet were pretty much walking themselves up to the line.
There was a girl about your age doing the matching for your line, and she met your gaze after letting the next person in. She grinned, and approached you.
"Hello! Welcome to Cosmic Hearts, do you know how we work?"
"Sort of... I just don't know how the matches are made."
"Oh, it's no worries, we do that all for you! We only really take the girl's request for preference types, and then we match accordingly from the other line. Is there something in particular you want about your match? Looks? Behaviour?"
You raised an interested eyebrow, skeptical about how accurate your preferences would be in terms of the match.
That being said, it was just an elaborate kissing booth, it's not like you were using the stall to find the love of your life-- no, you were looking to prove to John that you could be daring, that you weren't as boring as he maybe thought.
"Look, girl-to-girl here, I trust your judgement in choosing me a good-looking guy..." your voice tapered off for a moment before you added, " I just might want someone who doesn't seem too overconfident."
The Match Girl smiled wide, and gestured toward the door to the spaceship with her hand, pushing it open to let you in. You were the next girl in line, and the boys in the lineup watched as you took a deep breath and moved in.
As you walked toward the threshold of the dark room, Match Girl filled you in on the instructions.
"The other side of the curtain will be your 'contact area', only walk through when you hear the other door close; that'll mean he's inside as well. You'll have two minutes alone together, at which point we will open the central door and let you both out"
Your heart began to quicken. It didn't really occur to you until now that you were about to make out with a complete stranger in the dark, and leave that spaceship hand-in-hand just to prove to John wrong about you lacking in as much fun as he thought.
But this impulsive plan of yours also excited you a lot.
Maybe by the end of the night, you'd be leaving with a boyfriend, and telling John that you told him so.
You took your final step into the rocket, and your heart pounded against your ribcage as it all went dark.
After about thirty seconds of silence, you heard some shuffling from the other side of the curtain, and then a simple, "your two minutes start now," from the staff.
Your heart was beating so loud, you could hear the blood flowing in your ears. Your remaining senses enhanced, provided your lack of vision, and you followed the wall to the right with your hand, past the curtain, and you could feel an immediate change in temperature in the room.
You were much warmer now, hyper-aware of the fact that you were sharing body-heat with whoever the staff matched you with. You had to relay it in your head a few times what this actually meant for you. It meant that the stranger in this room with you was going to get to know you quite intimately in a pretty short amount of time.
This made you think a moment or two about the other party in this situation: The Stranger. What was his story? Was he dared to jump in line by his buddies to get some action? Maybe his story is that he just wanted to have his first kiss to get it just done and over with, or maybe he, like yourself, was just doing it for the Hell of it.
Whatever the reason, you felt you owed it to them to give them a decent snogging.
Your hand continued to drift along the wall before your thumb bumped into another hand. You gasped quietly, knowing you were close to the stranger, just not exactly sure of where abouts until now.
You lifted your hand off the wall at the same time as him, and as to not lose you, he made sure to reach out and take your hand in his gently, seeming more like an offer than a demand, which you took, admittedly rather nervously, especially when his other hand reached out to grab the other hand at your side.
Something was just so thrilling picturing so many renditions of handsome young men in your head, mixing and matching what he looked like based on what you could feel. His hands were larger than yours, and his fingers were calloused.
He played guitar, or bass, or something, and you knew this because John played, and you remember him telling you once that the strings were really hard on the hands, and you could just tell by looking at his hands that he wasn't joking.
You just thought the feeling was such a contrast against your own hands, which were soft and untouched, and you were sure with the way this guy was running his thumbs over your palms, and the pads of your fingers, he was admiring the contrast as well.
You almost wanted to say something to him about it, but he had you stuck in a trance, especially when he let your hands go for a moment to gently feel up your arms for your shoulders. You tried your best not to be too reactive, but you couldn't help the goosebumps trailing after his touch.
His hands moved up, and you felt his fingertips graze the crooks of your neck and then up under your jaw.
Neither of you spoke, this moment too intimate for the silence to break. You and he breathed so shallow, it was hard to even believe there was someone in the room with you.
But there was, and his fingers traced your jawline slowly, one hand deviating up to cradle the back of your head while the other gently traced around your chin.
Your lips parted, your own hands reaching out for his waist so you had some idea of where he was in front of you. Your fingers found his jacket, and as you tightened your hands around the leather, you felt him move a little closer as his thumb finally found its way to your bottom lip.
You felt his breath on your face, and you held your own, squeezing your eyes shut when you realized they had been wide open the whole time.
And finally, after what seemed like too long, his thumb disappeared and he replaced it with his own lips.
The kiss was soft, and not pushy at all, but you were tense like a rock under his touch from how nervous you actually were, and you just kept still.
He pulled away for a moment, and you could feel your face burning. That was not the kind of note you were going to leave on. Whoever this was, he had clearly gotten your attention, and you needed to return the favour.
Your one hand moved up his chest, over his collarbone and around his neck to pull him back down towards you. Your lips came together again, and you felt him melt into your embrace after an unsure second, hands dropping down to snake around your waist and pull you flush against him.
You sighed against his mouth, and he pushed his tongue past your lips, all of your past worries melting away. You were in heaven, so drunk on intimacy that you forgot what you were even doing in there in the first place. You tried pulling him even closer by the jacket, to which he responded by slowly backing you against the wall, one of his hands dropping to your hip, and the other returning to the back of your head like before.
Your hand behind his neck slipped up into his hair, and he moaned gently when you tightened your fingers up in the strands and pulled a little.
"Yes, Baby..." the words tumbled from his mouth lowly, and you felt a chill shoot right up your spine; you immediately froze up, lips separating as the realization hit you. You felt like you were going to faint.
"John?!" Your question was short, but clear, and you felt your suspicions were all too correct when you felt all of his muscles tense up as well at the sound of your voice.
"...Y/n?!" His voice cracked, body frozen in place like a statue. As were you, grip still tight in his hair and on his jacket.
You were speechless-- you couldn't believe the one you just spent the last minute and a half or so with-- the one with whom you spent the most intimate experience in your entire life-- was John.
The gentle touching, the embracing of the heavy silence, the patient behaviour, the soft kissing, the respect of your boundaries, and the feeling of wanting more-- it was all John.
This was the first time in your life you had ever experienced John in a situation where he didn't have the words he needed to speak at his disposal.
But to be fair, neither did you. What would anyone do in a situation like this?
It became all the more real for the both of you a moment later when the doors opened up, the lights around the rocket ship lighting John's face for you to see, and your face for him. You both sported embarrassing shades of red on your cheeks, and John's mouth just hung open in perpetual shock as he took in the fact that it was you.
After a second, you both came back down to earth, and your hands came zipping off each other so fast, John scratching his head nervously and giving you space from the wall, and you folding your arms over your chest and gripping your biceps tightly with your fingers.
You couldn't even look John in the eye, nor could he with you, let alone speak. You walked out the door, John at your side. The Match Girl waited by the bottom of the ramp, grinning ear-to-ear. If only she'd known.
"Pretty good-looking, huh?" She nudged to you with a wink, and you could feel your face grow hotter as you glanced over to John. You made brief eye-contact, and you cast your eyes straight to the ground when it happened.
You were thinking things about John you never would have before had it not been for that stupid snog box.
"Yes," was all you could say, nodding for the most part and squeaking out a soft thank you to her before you turned on your heel, and beelined straight for the women's room, rushing out to John that you were running to the loo without looking back at him.
You were too focused on finding some cold water to splash in your face, and a quiet space to figure out what to do in this situation; the lights and sounds had your head just spinning, and it was too difficult to concentrate.
The women's room was quiet enough, and when you felt you'd splashed enough water in your face, you went and sat in one of the stalls for a while to break down the situation that just happened, and what you were going to do to fix it.
John was your friend. There was no way you were going to let something like this drive a wedge between you, especially if you just had to explain yourselves. You had your reasons going in there, as did he.
You were just hoping this could be something you could both look back on in the future and laugh.
You took a few sobering deep breaths before leaving the women's room. You rounded the corner, not quite sure where to begin looking for John, but you found you didn't have to go far when a rather familiar set of fingers took hold of your own as soon as you stopped.
You glanced over your shoulder and there he was. He'd been waiting for you the whole time.
And now he was holding your hand.
That's new.
"... Can we talk?" you spoke simultaneously, and you both smiled a little. John still couldn't seem to hold your gaze for too long without needing to tear his eyes away and resort to looking at his shoes, yet he still held a firm grip on your hand.
You'd never seen him like this before. It was sobering to see him without so much confidence.
"Where did you wanna talk? Nowhere's really private here."
"... Did you just wanna get outta here?" As soon as the words left his mouth, your shoulders lowered in relief. You both definitely had enough excitement for the night, and when you nodded your head sheepishly, John gave your hand a little squeeze, gestured you to come with him with his head, and you both headed for the Fair exit.
Your stroll down the town streets were quiet. Nothing was said between you two for the first little while, your strides were slow, your destination was unknown, and your hands were still clasped together. You took in the night air, for the sun had dropped below the horizon while you were in the spaceship, and the temperatures were lower.
You weren't too sure yet how John felt about all of that night's events so far, and what he thought of you. Clearly, based on the fact that his hand was still in yours, some opinion of his had changed.
Was he comfortable holding your hand now knowing it was you who shared such an intimate moment with him? Or was he maybe wanting to break off this friendship with you all because of tonight, and hand-holding was the only way he could think to comfort you?
At one point, John's fingers unraveled from yours, and you both slowed to a stop. He shrugged off his jacket and wordlessly draped it over your shoulders before you pushed your arms up into the sleeves. John tried looking you in the eye again, and he swallowed nervously, face going red yet again.
"John, we need to talk about what happened."
"I know."
You took his hand this time, and guided him to the curb, sitting down together. Your fingers left his, and you both planted your hands at the curb at your sides.
There was silence for a moment as the memories of what happened back at the Fair resurfaced in your minds, what you were both feeling for each other, physically and emotionally, in your literal moments of blissful ignorance...
"Okay. I'm just going to put this out there right now. John, I had absolutely no idea that they matched me with you, or that you were even in line, for that matter." You sighed before continuing on, feeling the creep of warmth washing over your face yet again.
"I jumped in line impulsively when you left because I figured if you came back and you saw me leaving the rocket with a guy, I could prove to you tonight that I can be just as spontaneous and daring and fun as you."
You could see the gears turning in John's head when you finished saying your part, and after a second of putting the pieces together, his eyes widened, and then this wide smile spread right across his face, and, to your utter relief, he started laughing.
And it sounded so different compared to all of the other times he laughed around you. You couldn't quite place exactly what was different this time, but you found it to be more melodic than usual; more genuine. It was like music to your ears.
"I uh, I jumped in line for kind of the same reason." You raised a confused eyebrow, so John elaborated a little more, smile faltering a little as he cleared things up.
"Let me explain; If you saw me leaving the rocket with a girl, I was hoping I could convince you to do something tonight a little out of your comfort zone, like I did with that."
There was your Pièce De Résistance: John's reason for being in there all along was to teach you to live a little. And you were simply in there to live.
"Not that I wanted to see you specifically go through with the spaceship and getting felt up the wrong way, per se, but I just..."
John's words trailed off, and you could tell he was struggling to find words again. So, he decided to take this conversation in another direction.
"Okay, look, y/n, I don't want you to be under the impression that I think you're no fun. It's just not true. I adore you. There's just something about seeing you at the peak of excitement that makes me feel warm inside, like a child. I see this in moments you doubt yourself, but you still take that chance and you come out successful in the end, shining with confidence. I wanted to see you tonight with that same glow. And I would have if I hadn't have made fun in the first place that you were such a bore, so I'm sorry."
John dropped his head down after he finished speaking, and you looked at him for a moment, blinking once before reaching out to rub his back.
"Johnny, there is nothing to be sorry about." He turned his gaze to look at you, and you took some long pauses between your sentences. John was patient, eyes watching your face, and hanging onto every word you said.
"Of all the people I could have ended up with in that rocket tonight, I don't think you have any idea just how grateful I am that it was you in there with me, and not some stranger."
You didn't think you could keep it inside forever just what you thought about John's kissing, but you didn't think you'd give up fifteen minutes after the situation, either.
"John, I've kissed boys before, that's no secret between us; but what is is that I've never kissed a boy the way I kissed you tonight, and the attention you were giving back to me, I thought I nearly fell for you in there, and I had no clue it was even you," you laughed a little, the words feeling funny in your mouth, especially when they were for John's ears, only. Those words elicited red faces from the both of you.
"... I never thought I'd ever be nervous looking you in the eye, but to be quite honest, all that comes to mind when I see your face right now is the bubbling of excitement in my chest, and the feel of my legs going wobbly. God, John, would I be crazy to say I want you to kiss me like that all over again?"
You figured if you didn't throw the opportunity out there, you just might lose the chance to experience what you felt again, even if it meant just one last time in your life. But when John remained silent for longer than you hoped, your confidence began to falter. Perhaps John wasn't so comfortable with you anymore.
"... Would I be crazy?" You asked again, this time just above a whisper. John was the kind of person you expected to laugh something like this off. Perhaps he'd tease you for a moment, but ultimately tell you it was no big deal before gently rejecting you.
Instead, his silence indicated something much different. His eyes darted to your lips for a moment, a hand reaching up to hold the back of your head gently as he glanced up into your eyes.
"Love, if you think you're crazy for thinking that, then what I'm thinking must make me completely mad."
Your heart pounded against your ribcage, and John decided not to waste any more time in reconnecting your lips.
At first it was a little strange, his mouth on yours, but it wasn't in any way unpleasant. You found yourself, before long, snaking your arms around John's shoulders as you pulled him ever closer, your chests now flush as he tilted his head to the side to deepen the kiss. You hummed at the contact, but John had to pull away soon after to catch a breath, but he kept your chests flush so he could feel your heartbeat.
The contrast of kissing him knowing full well who he was still didn't change the respect in his movements, and the gentleness of his kisses.
When your eyes met again, you couldn't help but smile nervously at him, biting down on your lip as you noticed his cheeks glowed pink.
"Wow," you sighed.
"I'll say," he responded, one corner of his mouth twitching up into a smirk as the pad of his thumb drew invisible patterns from your cheekbone down your jaw.
That's when your smile began to fall slowly, and John noticed this as he was going to dive in for another kiss.
"What's the matter, Love?"
"... I think I like this too much. I think I like you too much," you said bluntly. The more you and John indulged in what you both physically wanted, the more you realized what you were putting on the line.
"... And is that a problem?" John asked you gently, and you raised your eyebrow, pulling away a little more from the embrace.
"It's a problem because this puts our friendship at risk, John. Every time our lips touch, the harder it is to look at you platonically."
"Then don't look at me platonically anymore," His suggestion was so effortless as you felt his other hand reach up to play with your hair.
"... I never expected tonight to go the way it did. But y/n, the more I think about a situation where it was anyone but me in that rocket with you, the more jealous I'm becoming... The more grateful I am that it was me, too."
John took another moment to bask in the silence before clearing his throat, and looking you right in the eyes.
"My eyes are wider than they've ever been before, and my mind is so clear. Why don't we try dating?" He suggested after a moment of deciding whether to ask in the first place.
"Dating?!" You paused. "John, if anything were to happen to what we have..."
"I know you're scared, y/n. So am I. But... I also believe this can be the beginning of something really great."
John let the hand in your hair drop to his shoulder where one of your hands rested. He gave your fingers a squeeze before he raised your hand to his lips to kiss your knuckles.
"We already kind of go on dates, and now that kissing and hand holding is on the list of things we're comfortable with, we might as well just put a label on it."
John paused for a moment. "It's not like we have to scream it from the rooftops unless you wanted to. But... after tonight, it would be a treat to be able to walk around with my arm 'round your waist and proudly announce to the world that you're mine."
That comment of his made you bite back a toothy grin, but your red face really emphasized how his words made you feel. You were expecting a teasing jab from John, but, surprisingly, nothing came. Just hopeful eyes awaiting your response.
"If you're so confident we'll flourish romantically... then I'm with you, Johnny. We'll give it a go. But under one condition!"
John looked at you expectantly.
"You win me that damned stuffed animal tomorrow night, Lenny."
Now it was John's turn to grin, his arms curling around your body and pulling you into a warm embrace as he mumbled "deal" into your ear.
You were once again surrounded by leather, the crisp night air, the single dim beam of light from the streetlamp, and the faintest scent of whatever John's body wash was.
But most of all, you we're surrounded by young love.
You finally supposed that by the end of the night, you did end up leaving with a boyfriend, and telling John that you told him so.
You just had no clue you could kill two birds with one stone the way you had.
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A/A/N: I really hope you guys enjoyed this! I've had it in the works for LITERALLY four years now, and I am just SO glad it can be out in the world now.
PERMENANT TAG LIST
@culturefiendtrashqueen
@cowgorls
(Pls message if you want to be added/removed from my permanent/oneshot/chapter fic tag lists!)
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formulaorange · 7 months
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2023 Fall Anime
This is honestly a loaded season full of new shows based on relatively new manga. Lots to look forward to
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Spy x Family - Season 2 One of the most fun SJ series that have come out in a while. Season 1 was killer, high hopes for season 2.
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Goblin Slayer 2 I didn't realize they were even making a second season. This was such a killer series. I'm really hoping they don't fall into the many mid-tier fantasy tropes out there in anime right now. I thought the appeal of the show was really Goblin Slayer himself and less about the lackeys along the way. So we'll see how it goes.
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Frieren: Beyond Journey's End This is definitely one of my highly anticipated series. It's about an elf who was part of the Hero's party and her life after he dies. (Since elves live longer) Definitely a darker take on fantasy but has some really solid fantasy and adventure vibes.
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Rising of the Shield Hero - Season 3 Season 2 was pretty disappointing and slow. While this looks like it'll be more fast paced, it does look like a tournament arc of sorts. I know some aren't a fan of that kind of arc, but honestly I think it's exactly what this series needs to pick things up again. We'll see.
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The Faraway Paladin - Season 2 This was legitimately one of my favourite fantasy series. I thought it was really well written and didn't rush things like other series. I'm looking forward to this season.
Sequels/Continuations: Eminence in Shadow - Season 2 killer series with an anti-hero main character. Definitely worth checking out. After-School Hanako-Kun Hanako-kun spin off Dr. Stone Season 3 - Part 2 One of the best novel concept series with nothing else in it's genre to compare to. Definitely didn't drop the ball on the recent seasons and still worth watching. Dead Mount Death Play - Part 2 One that I didn't particularly enjoy, but has a decent sized manga following. Tokyo Revengers - Tenjiku Arc The continuation of the series. Might be just me but it feels like the series fell off after the first season. The Saint's Magic Power is Omnipotent - Season 2 A more mature take on fantasy isekai that just started to get into romance at the end of last season. A solid combo of shoujo genres. The Ancient Magus' Bride - Season 2 Part 2 One that I haven't had a change to check out yet but have only heard good things about. Hypnosismic - Season 2 a weirdly addictive musical/rap series. Unique characters and honestly solid rap battles. One I'll be enjoying. -- Related - Paradox Live - Music battle with what looks to be the same style of animation and solid character design. Definitely worth looking at if you're a fan of Hypmic. The Seven Deadly Sins: Four Knights of the Apocalypse A sequel of SDS. Looks like it could be a fun watch for the fans of the series. New:
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Shangri La Frontier A new manga fantasy series. This may be a horrible way to describe but it is what it is - a new age SAO- full dive fantasy game. A gamer who only plays shit games, gets into a new massively popular MMORPG and is op. One that I'm excited for because it ticks all the fantasy game boxes I like.
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Undead Unluck A relatively new manga series that gained a lot of traction in the last year or two. A gory action comedy that's super chaotic and a lot of fun.
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Shy Brand new hero manga series about a shy girl and her anxieties and struggles going into the hero world who grows and gains confidence as she becomes a better hero.
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Ron Kamonohashi's Forbidden Deductions This is a manga series that I have kept forgetting the name of so never got a chance to read but all the covers for the manga look phenomenal. Likely the anime doesn't do him justice but it is what it is. Essentially sherlock in anime form. A PI with issues and the wholesome police detective work together to solve crime. Other New Series: Green - Fantasy Pink - Romance Red - Action Purple - Drama The Kingdoms of Ruins A world where witches were hunted down by humans as science surpassed magic. A kid who was raised by a witch swears revenge on mankind. This honestly looks solid. The animations are very cool looking and the mc seems to be an anti-hero. Will be looking at this one. Under Ninja A well known manga series about modern ninjas. Definitely a unique series for this season. The Apothecary Diaries A historical medical mystery show. I've heard the name before and I've also only heard good things. Will be worth a watch. A Girl & Her Guard Dog The granddaughter of a crime syndicate goes to highschool out of town and the current young boss lies his way into the same school. Would be cute romance if it weren't for the fact she's 15 and he's 26.. Butareba - The Story of a Man Turned into a Pig What the title says. A girl finds him and the story goes from there. I'm Giving the Disgraced Noble Lady I Rescued a Crash Course in Naughtiness The usual light novel title. Honestly, doesn't seem as yikes as I initially thought, might just be harmless breaking the rules kinda thing. Could be fun, also a Capybara that strikes fear into people's hearts. My Daughter Left the Nest and Returned an S-Rank Adventurer Looks like a wholesome series where an adventurer finds a baby, raises it and she becomes so strong she's busy working all the time. Just a cute father daughter relationship in a fantasy setting about her wanting to come take time to see him but being caught up in OP fantasy battles. Ragna Crimson Dragons vs Humanity - a human and a dragon team up to destroy all the dragons. Action fantasy series. Berserk of Gluttony I honestly added this because I thought it was hilarious. Looks like a combo of knock offs - the Gluttony skill from Tensura (reincarnated as a slime) and the mc being called Fate with the main girl who looks exactly like Sabre. I'll be skipping but its' here so you know.
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iguana-eyanna · 1 year
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Baby Girl
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Pairing: Niall Horan x curvy reader
Summary: after a night of drinking, you and Niall realize that you're more than flirtatious friends
Warnings: mature themes, explicit language and unprotected sex.
The music was thumping, the bass reverberating through the club as Niall and you made your way to the bar. You were both a little tipsy, having indulged in a few too many drinks during the night out with their friends. The playful banter that had become both your trademark was in full swing, as you teased each other with witty comebacks and flirtatious remarks.
"I swear that these heels would be the death of me." You said out loud.
"Thought you had that spot reserved for me?" Niall asked, smirking as he closed in.
You rolled your eyes as you turn around, grinding in front of him seductively.
"Try all you want lover boy, but you can't handle all of this." You said, biting your bottom lip as your cheeks heated up.
Niall couldn't deny of how much he needed you.
"I'll do my best."
You met on the Voice where you did a guest appearance. He thanked Kelly as you were a guest on her show to promote your latest album. Once you said you were a fan of the singing competition show, Kelly invited you with no hesitance. You kicked it off with the other judges as Kelly introduced you to Niall after the show. He was blown away by your voice and the way you brightened up the room.
You two kicked it off quite strongly, already skipping the awkward of meeting someone for the first time. Everyone witnessed it. Tabloids and late night shows were already skeptilizing that you two were an item. Kelley, Chance, and Blake would even tease Niall when he was tying the knot with you.
All he could do was chuckle and shake his head.
But tonight, with the alcohol fueling his emotions, he found himself looking at you differently. Everything about you was beautiful to him, and he couldn't help but admire how you carried yourself with such grace and charm.
As you stood at the bar, waiting for the bartender to take their order, Niall's gaze lingered. You were wearing a stunning green dress that hugged your curves in all the right places, and he couldn't help but imagine what it would be like to touch you, to taste your lips.
Niall leaned in closer to your ear, whispering with his husky voice. "What can I get you, Baby Girl?"
Your cheeks flushed at Niall's sudden change in tone. You were used to your flirty banter with him, but the way he called you "baby girl" sent shivers down your spine. You couldn't deny the attraction you felt towards him either, and the alcohol was making your inhibitions slip away.
"You know what I like," you replied, with your voice slightly breathless.
Niall ordered drinks and you two found a quiet corner to sit in. As the night went on, your conversation grew more intimate, and touches more lingering.
"I never realized you wanted to be an author." Niall asks when he just asked you what occupation you would do if you didn't pursue music.
"Yeah, I really loved to write stories when I was kid. When I got older, I took every opportunity just to write. Had to wake up from that dream when my University denied to publish one of my works I was most proud of."
"Hey." Niall said, placing a gentle hand on your thigh.
"They don't deserve to have your works publish, you can do that yourself, cause you know why? You're the most talented, gorgeous person I know. Those who say otherwise can come through me." Niall said, defending your honor.
The sexual tension between you two was palpable, and Niall found it harder and harder to resist the temptation to kiss you.
You could visibly see him staring at your lips, but you realized that this wasn't the right moment.
With enough drunken courage, you dared to say the sentence that would change your friendship forever.
"How far is your place from here?"
Before he knew it, you were both outside, the cool night air hitting you two as you stumbled towards an Uber. Niall's hand found its way to the small of your back, pulling you closer to him. You didn't protest, instead leaning into his touch, your own hands gripping his shoulders. The ride felt like an eternity, as you tried to take your hands away from him but you couldn't.
When you reached Niall's apartment, the moment of truth arrived. Niall hesitated for a moment, his heart pounding in his chest. He had never been one for casual hookups, but he couldn't deny these feelings stirring inside his chest. And the way you looked at him with those dark, longing eyes made him lose all reason.
Without another word, Niall pulled the reader into his apartment and closed the door behind them.
You leaned towards the wall as you tried to untie the strings of your heels.
Niall closed the distance between you and whispered to you.
"Let me."
He slowly bends and unties the wraps around your legs. You look down, thinking this is the most sexiest thing anyone has down for you. Once he was done, you lift his chin up to connect your eyes back to his.
"I need to know what we're about to do isn't a mistake. I don't to be a regret."
Niall got up, hovering as his hand leaned over you as your back laid flat to the wall.
"You will never be a regret. I want this, and I want you... more than you know."
Without hesitation, your lips crashed together in a hungry, desperate kiss, hands roaming each other's bodies with urgency. The heat between the two of you was electric, as the desire for each other reached a fever pitch.
Niall's hands slid down to your waist, pulling you closer to him as he whispered against your lips, "You're mine, baby girl."
Your breath hitched at his words, and found yourself melting into Niall's embrace. His hands traveled to the back of your dress, trying to find your zipper as you tried unbuckling his pants.
You both staggered upstairs half dressed as you landed onto his bed. His piercing blue eyes try to memorize every part of your skin. All was left was your underwear and Niall had to resist from tearing it straight off your body. He uses his finger to drag down the little material and trailed it down your legs.
He released a breath, sitting up a bit. He combs his fingers through your hair and kisses you softly. You melt under his hot touch as you closed your eyes. Niall hastily undresses himself soon he finds his hands on your waist, steadying you on top of him.
You gasp as you began to feel him within you. His hands hold you tighter as you began to have a steady rhythm.
"God, you're fuckin''- perfect." Niall huffs out.
You smirked down at him as you bite your bottom lip.
"I can say the same about you..." you teased.
Niall became undone with your words. Your confidence, your beauty, and damn that luscious body - all he could see was stars.
You thought the same about him: the way he held you so tenderly and how his eyes looked up to you like you were a goddess.
You both wished that the night wouldn't end.
By the end, you two were breathless (almost lifeless too.) You laid down next to him, placing a hand on Niall's heaving chest.
"Next time, you're on top." You said, catching your breath.
Niall looks over at you with a twinkle in his eye.
"Next time?" He asks.
"Well, we'll just see by morning." You said, knowing he's teasing you as you're already sinking in the pillow next to him.
His hands glue back to your side as he pulls you in.
"Oh, you'll like what I have planned," he said before you two drifted off to sleep.
The next morning, you felt light-headed as you turned around to meet Niall. He was nowhere to be found. You thought he somehow left for work but you were gladly wrong when you saw him coming in shirtless, holding a tray of breakfast and drinks.
"Wasn't sure if you wanted coffee or juice, so I made both." Niall said, walking towards the bed and laid the breakfast tray on the mattress.
You smile , holding the blanket over your chest as you sat up.
"It's definitely a coffee morning." You said, grabbing the mug.
"Wanted treat my baby girl." he said as he grabbed the other glass, taking a sip.
"Thank you Ni, you're definitely the sweetest man I ever met." You said, leaning over to kiss his cheek.
His cheeks grew red by your action, so he took your free hand and kissed it.
"I want to spend these mornings with you, and hopefully to be with you if you'd like to." He asks, his heart slightly thumping as he awaits your answer.
You place the coffee down by his nightstand and turn to him, smiling like you're lovesick.
"I'd like that very much." You said, as you two began to kiss and laid down on the bed.
Let's just say the breakfast Niall just made was long forgotten.
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sirgogington · 2 months
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My Word Vomit Response on the Shelby Situation
Main Situation: Last week Wilbur Soot from Lovejoy was accused of having been abusive towards his ex girlfriend Shelby. Shelby is a live streamer and last week she did a livestream about the signs of knowing if you are in an abusive relationship. She never stated his name, but from details given people started assuming it was about Wilbur Soot. A few days later Wilbur confirmed that it was him in an apology tweet on his Twitter account. The abuse had to do with painful biting, and manipulation. 
    I want to start off by saying I do believe Shelby's story. I don't think Wilbur is innocent, but I do believe this situation isn't as black and white as people are claiming it to be. 
    Former fans after hearing the story started unfollowing Wilbur and Lovejoy and saying what a terrible man that Wilbur is, and vowing to never listen to or view any of his content ever again. He's not just a terrible man, he has to be evil too. I may be optimistic but I do think most people can change for the better if they truly want to. There are exceptions, but I truly believe that Wilbur can. The internet wants to just label him as evil and not give him any room to do that. The new thing is "guilty until proven innocent" and that's super harmful as I will go into in a different post. The way people are spreading hate in a us/them mentality is not a mature way of viewing/handling this situation and does more harm than good. Especially when it comes to death threats and doxing which have been received by both sides.
   Wilbur is someone who had a hard upbringing, and has brought up at different times his struggles with mental health. On screen or on stage you would never know this about him, because he has this mask of being confident, well spoken, and joyful. Through these details Wilbur has shared we know that touring took a lot out of him mentally and put him in a bad place, but that he was seeking therapy and is probably currently still seeing a therapist to try and get better. He's shared in the past that when he first blew up on the internet he used alcohol to cope because of how overwhelming it was that so many people were consuming his content. From Shelby's stream we also learned that his living space was dirty and unhygienic and that he would make excuses for it. The details for me paint the picture of a guy struggling badly with mental illness and having a hard time caring for himself and his home. Someone who can hardly take care of themselves should not have been in a relationship. This puts a lot on the other person.  It's different if he were stable and then then his mental health crashed in the middle of a longer relationship, but not if your too mentally ill to begin with. I do deeply feel sorry that Shelby had to experience that, as it truly shouldn't have happened. 
   I went to school for psychology and know quite a bit about different types of mental illnesses. I am by no means diagnosing Wilbur, but I do think he shows signs of someone with Boderline Personality Disorder. Borderline Personality Disorder is an emotional disregulation disorder characterized by unstable mood, behavior, and relationships. People with BPD self sabotage and will frequently end up pushing people away because they don't think they're good enough for them. (In this case maybe he wanted to act so bad so she would leave him, which is very unhealthy). People with BPD also go through depressive episodes and can act impulsively. Without therapy it is extremely hard to cope with this condition but with therapy you can make great strides in changing. I think like most mental illnesses you are aware of the fact you don't like the way you're acting you just have a hard time controlling it. For instance for me growing up with anxiety I knew most of my fears were completely irrational but that didn't stop them from overtaking my life and still feeling anxious. Wilbur has written some really deep lyrics on his new solo album Mammalian Sighing Reflex and I feel like it reflects that he doesn't like the way he is and feels guilty about those he's harmed through it. Maybe I'm giving this man too much credit, but like I said I do believe most people are capable of changing for the better. 
   Shelby stated she did the livestream as a way to help protect other victims of domestic violence and Wilbur Soot himself. He might still be dangerous to the public, it's really hard to know. I know after my own situation with being manipulated I was worried about the guy going after other younger women like he had with me. I didn't want anyone else have to be in that situation so I understand where Shelby is coming from. I also know that if the guy in my life had ever posted an apology, no matter how good it was, that I still wouldn't believe him and have a hard time forgiving him. Bold take but I think his apology was at least decent. Could it have been better, yeah, but could it have been a lot worse, also yes. In his apology he admits to being the person Shelby was talking about. He states that her feelings are valid, and that he wants people to hold him to higher accountability, and that he was sorry for any hurt he caused. Maybe he isnt, but it's hard to know. Wilbur stated in a livestream from last October 2023 that he was going to therapy the next day, because of this we can assume that Wilbur has been going to therapy at minimum since October. In that same livestream he states that he showers once a day when he's in his "big sad", and that he has rented places all over Brighton. He is at least hygienic in this regard, maybe moreso than he was before. It could be a red flag that Wilbur has lived all over Brighton due to possible evictions whether that be negligence or noise complaints from doing livestreams.
   We'll never know how other content creators truly feel about him except for the ones that made it obvious. Of course most content creators are going to jump on the bandwagon and agree that he's an evil man. If they don't then they'll lose their platform because of all the hate they'd get. I do believe some content creators will still hang out with Wilbur secretly or still even remain his friend. But we'll never know. 
   For the people who are posting different video evidences of Wilbur supposedly showing signs of being abusive in the past this is what is called confirmation bias. If you believe someone is abusive suddenly you can find details in the littlest things to confirm your thought process. A lot of the clips I've been seeing have been of normal everyday behavior or confirmed bits. I've seen people say that Wilbur must have bit down really hard to leave bruises. In some cases people bruise more easily than others. I know I have random bruises on my body from nothing. We can tell that what Wilbur did however was pretty painful due to have to use a safe word. Getting bitten usually hurts. I've been bitten by a 5 year old at work and can't imagine how it would feel to be bitten by a grown man who intentionally bit down hard.
This could be confirmation bias as well, but when looking at the lyrics in Mammalian Sighing Reflex and at the album art it seems to tell the story of a man (Wilbur) who really messed up in a relationship and is feeling the pain from that, and has a lot of regret due to knowing he was the cause of her pain. He poured so much of himself into the album it's like he's bleeding out in front of the audience with the amount of vulnerability.
Analyzing lyrics because why not, using lyrics from "Mammalian Sighing Reflex"
"I get so drunk I can barely see." If this album is related to his relationship with Shelby, which I think it probably is, then maybe he tried to cope with the relationship failing by using alcohol, or sabotaged the relationship through drinking.
"A lot of friends have left my life, escaping my tractor beam of woe" Having a mental illness can make it hard to maintain friendships. This could be because it makes you so self-focused on your problems, or that people get tired of hearing about your problems. If you constantly talk about how sad you are, some people are going to have a hard time dealing with that, or get burnt out from having to keep on cheering you up.
"Fuck my life, you cared when I was sick, no one ever gave a shit.....you fought this war one-sided and asked me what am I doing this for." These lyrics seem to speak about how in a past relationship (probably meaning with Shelby), that she cared that he was mentally ill/in a low point and wanted to help him get better. The fight to help him get better was one-sided due to Wilbur not helping to get himself better. If he would have helped her then they "could of stitched my mind together."
"Never been the one for romance, never thought that I'd get married. Never been the kind to give a shared life a second glance, selfish prose." In Shelby's livestream she talked about how her and Wilbur talked about the possibility of getting married and having kids until he backtracked and said that he wasn't that way and changed his mind.
The song "I Don't Think It Will Ever End" is how his mind seems to work in cycles. He'll be sad, because he feels sad he hides away for a bit, but then he feels silly for hiding himself so he forces himself to interact with people. But then when forcing himself to interact again he feels sad, which he says is not a good feeling when you're supposedly in a good phase. He says as self-sabotage he gets silly. Wilbur is known for telling a lot of jokes, and maybe this is a way he masks his true feelings. Also for Mammalian Sighing Reflex it says the songs were written by William Gold (his legal name) and performed by Wilbur Soot (his stage name). Wilbur is who the internet/fans see him as and William Gold is who he really is. Meaning the way we see him online is the extroverted, charismatic, likeable guy we know him as whereas William Gold is introverted, self-sabotaging, nerdy, and a deep thinker.
     The internet gives us way too much information. We're constantly bombarded with more and more information. Before the internet and even in the earlier internet days you did not have this. People were not being as closely viewed and known as they are now. You have to be careful about every little thing you say, because God forbid you say the wrong thing and get canceled. It didn't used to be this way. The only reason you'd ever know anything bad about a celebrity is if they were in the news. I think most of the media we consume whether TV shows, movies, etc. have the potential to have us supporting "bad people". It would be overwhelming to look up every single person we had ever consumed media from and sift through what are lies and what are not about each actor, singer, etc. I get that people don't want to give a platform to people doing bad things, but it's almost impossible to know and to remove every single bad person from the content you consume.  Being a celebrity in general is hard. It's easy to become addicted to drugs, and experience toxicity especially celebrities that live in Los Angeles. Most become people they regret, but some change for the better too. I'm not saying people who do serious crimes should get out of jail because they can become better people. People in jail should remain in jail for serious crimes. Time will tell what becomes of him. If more about him is released or if he's able to actually make strides in his health like he said he would. We will wait and see. I really hope he can heal and get better. Even the most unlikely ones can change their lives. You can both support Shubble and hope that Wilbur gets better.
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foxufortunes · 2 months
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From: unknown number you’ve been invited to a monsters ball lucky you rabbit
Finally, the fic is out, A Monsters' Ball the pro-exy team MSBY Black Jackals (ft Andreil and some rabbits). Details like team line up and positions, alt jerseys, layers and some backstories beneath the cut.
So, our team line up and some details (and yes, I do have a colour coded spreadsheet to keep track of all this, which Neil and Sakusa constantly mess up by being the wrong year for their age bc they're babies, but ages are rough because no everyone has a declared birthday/age) with some art breaks between:
#4 Captain Meian Shuugo - 29, backliner, 5yrs MSBY, 5yrs college, from one of the country's best high school teams, 1 season as captain, trying really hard to be mature and not find everyone's antics funny, eternal rival to Hirugami Fukurou, captain of the champions, the Alders.
#20 V.Captain Hirugami Shouko - 26, backliner, 2yrs MSBY, 5yrs college, from another top high school, middle child of 2 pro-exy players (two of the earliest adopters before it got big, probably ppl who went to uni with Tetsuji and Kayleigh), younger sister of Alders captain Fukurou, joined the Jackals out of desire to say fuck you to her older brother.
#2 Amani Kanoka - 23, striker, rookie MSBY, 5yrs college, from a private all girls high school that became the best in the country, known as the Queens of Exy, very shy, has a lot of confidence issues, that she handles by being the best on court.
#5 Nathaniel Wesninski - 24, striker, MSBY rookie, 1yr Baltimore Wildcats, 4.5 yrs EAU Ravens, 0.5yrs PSU Foxes, joined the Foxes after only a year playing in a nowhere team but was quickly poached by the Ravens at Christmas that year and was a regular member the team the next year under his real name, very flighty, big fan of secrets, no idea how to handle the Jackals' chaos (they're like the Foxes but without the trauma).
#12 Bokuto Koutarou - 24, striker, 1yr MSBY, 5yrs college, one of the top 5 strikers in Japan in high school, another top high school team, ultimate himbo, might have committed tax fraud, has a word of the day calendar he's trying really hard to use properly, known for super sharp angle shots and for just bodying people and the ball.
#15 Sakusa Kiyoomi - 22, striker, rookie MSBY, 5yrs college, championship highschool team several yrs running, one of the top 3 strikers in Japan in high school, collegiate MVP, Team Japan 2016 squad, Team Japan U19 rep, grumpy baby, very into properly folded handkerchiefs, do not touch, preferably do not interact outside of court, speak to him via his adorable cousin or not at all unless saving him from bugs.
Halfway through the team stats, time for some art. The Away Colours! Maybe the racquets change to white too, idk I couldn't be bothered to recolour them though.
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Ok, back to the second half of the team:
#3 Andrew Minyard - 25, goalkeeper, 2yrs MSBY, 3yrs USC Trojans, 2yrs PSU Foxes, best goalkeeper and rookie awards during his rookie season, didn't really tell anyone his plans after university just kind of vanished, only told a handful of people he'd signed for a team, Neil thought he was dead, he has a motorcycle now because city traffic is awful on his sports cars and the stadium is walking distance, sometimes plays defensive dealer.
#6 Inunaki Shion - 26, goalkeeper, 4yrs MSBY, 3yrs college (dropped out to go pro), middling high school only competed nationally once, the vodka aunt of the team, here to get people drunk, instigate drama with the monsters and then sit back and laugh, actually very soft on the youngsters, tolerates stupid nicknames like Inu-san and Wan-san (never get tired of that being translated Mr Dog and Mr Woof).
#9 Adriah Tomas - 27, backliner, 1yr MSBY, a transfer from European leagues, surprisingly fast for his size, just happy to be here, comes across as a bit of an airhead, but is usually right next to Inunaki instigating chaos and then pretending he doesn't understand the language enough to know what happened.
#10 Oliver Barnes - 30, backliner, 2yr MSBY, Team USA 2016/2012 Olympic squads, transfer from America, big friendly softie, dad of the team, actual dad of a 5yo girl, starting to consider retirement into coaching so is happy to spend the end of his elite career with these idiots.
#13 Miya Atsumu - 23, offensive dealer, 5yrs MSBY, Team Japan 2016 Olypmic squad, Team Japan U19 rep, from a top high school, considered the best dealer in Japan in high school, signed straight from high school, a particularly offensive dealer, easily doubles as striker, all rounder (all Jackals are all rounders but the dealers in particular), demanding and thoughtless jerk but not trying to be nasty, can come across as arrogant but is the first to accept his own mistakes.
#21 Hinata Shouyou - 22, defensive dealer, MSBY rookie, 2yrs playing street exy in Brazil, middling high school team on the rise, player backliner in high school despite wanting to be a striker, but learned to play all positions in Brazil, sometimes move position based on what team they're facing, general ray of sunshine, obsessed with exy, does meditation and yoga in the sunrise preferably on a beach.
Ok, team done, have some more art because yes, I did layer these team pics up slowly from the base dri-fit layers to the armour/padding to the jerseys.
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The Jackals provide uniform everything from base layers to padding to anything like compression sleeves, knee/arm pads and everything else. Armour is provided by them to ensure it's up to regulation and team standards, the Jackals require some kind of shoulder padding (most of the team has detachable shoulder pads, while Bokuto and Sakusa who prefer more shoulder rotation and just more coverage respectively, where seperate bicep/shoulder pads). I've talked more about armour on older wip posts, but they're based on lacrosse chest pads. Brief version: strikers were shorter, around the vitals, backliners generally are longer on the sides to protect the ribs, goalies have more coverage because duh, and dealers wear whatever they like. Every single one has either hollow rigid or extra padded piece over the centre of the chest because, especially in younger players, a ball to the chest can stop your heart.
And there we go!
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xhoess · 1 month
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Fashion and design
Masterlist
Hongjoong!model x fem Bod! Fotographer
Summary: Hongjoong is a model and has his own clothing line, you are his fotographer for the day. When you saw that you got a chance to shoot hongjong you didn't believe it. You have been a fan of his clothing line for a while and are absolutely obsessed with it, but what you don't know is that he has been following your work since that day you started to post your photos.
Genre: romance(?), mature content
Warnings: without protection(wrap it up!!!), hongjoong down bad for you
You where sitting on your bed with your laptop, checking if you have anymore jobs for the next weeks. You see that next week on Wednesday you have a shoot scheduled with the Kim hongjoong. Designer and model. Your jaw drops in shock, why did he chose you to be his photographer, he has never even met you?
You quickly pick up your phone and dial your friends number.
"Jongho you will not believe who I will be shooting next week" "you sound exited, so probably someone famous?" He guesses. "Well yes ofcourse someone famous but I'll give you a hint, he is one of my top 3 designers in the fashion industry right now" you hear jongho think on the other side of the line, "hmm, is it Kim hongjoong?" He asks "YES it's fucking the Kim hongjoong, how did he find me I'm not even that famous I only had a couple professional collaborations" "I don't know y/n but I do know you definitely need to accept this, this is such a huge opportunity" He said "you're right, but I would never in a million years decline this anyway" you laugh.
You and jongho talk for a couple more minutes before you hang up to get ready for bed. But before you get up to wash your face you quickly accept the job offer. You can't wait till next Wednesday.
You were ready to lay in bed but your phone pings, you got an Instagram DM of a online friend you made recently, he was the absolute sweetest and helped you with a few dilemmas. You've told him almost everything that happened in your life the last few months and he's a good listener.
The week goes by very slow but it's finally Wednesday. You grab your stuff and drive to your photo studio. You've never felt so nervous to do a shoot, but it's logical, it's the biggest one yet.
Once the door is unlocked you turn the lights on with the light switch, you always forget how bright that light it's. Especially when it's still dark outside, which is right now because you need to come at least 2 hours early to set everything up.
About 1 pm there was a loud knock on the door, you rushed to the front of the studio to open it. "Hi, come on in, I am y/n l/n I will be your photographer today!" You say kindly, trying not to freak out in the meantime. "Hi y/n, my name is Hongjoong. I am glad you excepted my request, I love your work" He says while bowing slightly to greet you.
"You're kidding, I absolutely love the clothing line you have going on right now. Is it true you design every piece by yourself?" You ask. Hongjoong nods "yes, and I absolutely love doing it. Maybe I do it a bit to much, it causes a lot of stress but at the end it's all worth it" "I'm sure it is" you say.
A few minutes later you showed Hongjoong the dressing room where he could change clothes in private. While he was putting on the first outfit you put on some music, if it's silent you can't function properly.
When he came out of the dressing room you sure you stared a little too long at him "you like it?" He asked, smiling slightly. "I swear it's the best one yet, I love it when there is a lot of accessories in a outfit" you say. "I know" Hongjoong said, you were confused, what does he mean he knows? But you let it slide. You where not gonna let this get awkward. You told him to stand in front of the camera and the rest of the shoot went by quickly.
It was now 3 pm, the shoot was done and hongjoong went back to the dressing room. But he forgot his phone on the table next to the camera. When you picked it up to give it to him you saw a message from yourself on his phone. When i say your heart dropped it was not an understatement. Did you send him a instagram message? You questioned yourself so you went to double check on your own account. But no, the only one you had texted was your online friend. It couldn't possibly be him right?
You knock on his dressing room door and he sticks his head out, "y/n, what's up" "can you explain why you have a text of Me on your phone?" You say. "What? Where you going through my phone" "no you left it on the table next to my camera and I send a text message to what I thought was my online best friend but then your phone pings and I saw my username pop up. So explain, why were you being someone else?" He sighs "Come in please"
Once you've settled on the couch he begins explaining, "look, I can't follow you with my real account, people would've start questioning things and they would've started texting you about me. It was never my intention to Lie to you about it. But I love your work and I just wanted to contact you about it at first" he explained. You get it, you really do but you start to think back to all the conversations you had with him. And you remember one very clearly, last week when you hung op on jongho you texted him saying 'omg I am gonna photograph Hongjoong, now I am gonna see if he's really that hot in real life'
"I texted you ABOUT you, I've said so many stuff about you? I'm so embarrassed" you say and you can feel your cheeks burning. "You are embarrassed? I am the one who should be embarrassed" Hongjoong said, he sits down next to you and tries to make sure you have nothing to be ashamed of.
"But am I as hot as you thought I should be?" You don't answer. "Too shy to say it now, you said worse things about me tho" you looked at him "don't remind me hongjoong" you say, clearly ashamed of what you said. "Yk it's kinds hot when you told what you find hot about me like 3 monts ago, haven't stopped thinking about it since. Oh and the way you send daily vlogs about your day to me is so adorable, it's the highlight of the day. But when you send me that one outfit haul with the black long dress for the party, the one with the split and the cleavage was showing. I would be lying if I didn't get off that night"
"Are you serious?" He nods "yes, you have nothing to be embarrassed about y/n. I'm worse" "you're not worse" you state. While he was talking you where staring at his lips. "What compliments did you like the most then huh?" You say.
"When you said my hands would make a pretty necklace, got my head spinning while thinking about it" He said. "Let's make it happen then" you say.
Hongjoong lips attached to yours, the kiss wasn't so loving, it was rather hungry and messy. He pulled you on his lap and, he groaned in your mouth when you moved your hips downwards. His hand creeps from the back of your neck to the front, he disconnected the kiss and looked at you. You already looked fucked out and he had barely even started.
"Just as pretty as I imagined" He said. "Just shut up and fuck me already" you whined. "I'm taking my time with you" "well I am not taking my time with you" you slid of his lap and sat on your knees in front of the couch, in-between his legs.
You buckled his belt lose and in the process your hand brushed against his hard on, he bit the inside of his mouth to stay silent. His eyes stayed on you the whole time while you were u dressing him. Now he is only left in His underwear.
You get up and sit on his lap again, you connect your lips together and slide your hand from his torso to the waistband of his pants, you slide your hand in his underwear and you wrap your hand around his cock, you can already feel the precum comming put of his tip.
You start stroking your hand up and down, hongjong needs more, he bucks his hips upwards and moans in your mouth.
You get down on your knees again and take of his underwear in the meantime, his cock springs free and your hand is around it again in no time. You lower your head and lick his cock from the bottom to the top, he throws his head back and cursed your name. Once you reach the top you take the tip in your mouth and swirl your tongue around it.
He grabs a fistful of your hair and pushes you down a bit, you give in and start to bob your head up and down in a smooth motion. After a few minutes Hongjoong pulled out of your mouth "I can't hold it any longer and I want to be in you when I cum" He says, out of breath.
He lays you down on the couch and starts to prep you, he wets his fingers by sucking on them and God that looked hot. He first fingers you with two fingers but he soon noticed that you're so wet that he can easily add another one, you moan at the stretch when he adds the third finger.
"I'm ready joong" you manage to get out, and he does not need more consent. "Do you have a condom?" He asks, you shake your head "shit" He curses, "I'm clean" you say, looking at him with big eyes, "me too, you wanna do it without?" You nodded at him.
He hovers above you and lines up, he moves his hips slowly to let you adjust. Once you've adjusted fully he bottoms out slowly just to quickly push his cock back in. He looks at the way your boobs move when he pushes himself back in and decides to grab one of them, gently squeezing it.
"I can't hold it in much longer baby" He whines, you clench around him and he fastens his pace, his hand wraps around your neck and squeezes it, not to hard but hard enough to feel it. "You where right, pretty necklace" He says out of breath.
"I'm cumming" you moan, and a few seconds later you do, while you cum you clench even harder around hongjoongs cock and you moan out his name. That sends him over the edge and cums too. His semen is spilling out of you because it's so much.
Both of you are laying breathlessly on the couch, rethink about what just happened.
I just had fucking sex with Kim hongjoong, was the only thing you could think about.
Leave a like if you liked it!!! X.R
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Note
May I please request headcanons for Erron, Fujin, Johnny, and Hanzo reacting to their S/O snapping and causing major carnage with her telekinetic powers after being severely bullied?
Yes! But I don't write for erron I thought I did!
Fujin
He watched proudly accept your win at a small fighting tournament that you and other well known fighters were in
As you smiled feeling your heart warm seeing fujin and your friends proud of you until the next thing you knew was it all changed
You then saw everyone looking at you with such a familiar look and laughing as you see a big bucket of leftover cow blood seeing two fighters who were above you smiling
That was the last thing you remembered but for fujin he was pissed that someone ever did anything to harm you like that but he stopped when he saw your pupils get bigger
The next thing you knew was that the pillars fell in front of each exit so no one could leave followed by a lantern falling and the fire spreading around the whole area
He knew you had some kind of powers but he didn't know what they were until today as everyone ran and people started getting thrown around or killed from being trampled, crushed, or impaled
He slowly talked to you and cleaned you up which brought you back and after he lifted a pillar everyone left and he knew to make sure no one did anything to make you lose control ever again
Johnny
He was cheering loudly after you won fighter of the year award at a special tournament and ceremony
What he didn't expect was someone out of the blue used their air power to raise you up and just drop you really high in the air falling to the ground hurting your back
He sees your pupils get big and you stare off into nothing knowing that you were not in control of your powers
He knew you had telekinesis and how your powers worked but he had never seen you out of control with them like this and tried to stop someone from touching you but the next thing he knew was you were covered in mud and animal blood
Everything went to chaos from things flying and hitting people and all the doors closing to people getting injured and a few ending up died from being trampled by others or hurt by other people trying to escape
He immediately found Cassie who came with him and kept her next to him seeing you still on the ground going and wiping your face off and slowly talking to you
After a few minutes things started calming down and soon the doors were opened and everyone who was still alive or not on the ground ran out as he held you in his arms coming out of it and all of you going home as you kept apologizing and crying for what happened
Hanzo
He just felt something bad in his gut as he watched you fight against Kitana using your powers against her fans
He was happy you won the fight despite some of the nasty cuts you got from the fans but he could feel his soul sucked out of him from what happened as you were cheered on for winning
Kano comes behind you putting his hand covered in salt on your injured left hip and a hot poker on your right collarbone then beating you as you tried to fight back in pain
He immediately runs as do many fighters a few joining him hitting and kicking you on the ground while others pull people off you and fight kano going to you harming and injuring every person who had hurt you seeing your pupils huge and the usually happy and mature you gone
Instead he sees the rage and anger in your eyes and he immediately knew that whatever was gonna happen was not going to be pretty seeing people who harmed you get tossed across the arena, hit with big objects, and choked until they went unconscious
He immediately talks to you in Japanese slowly and calmly holding your face in his hands then going to English when he sees things around him back on the ground, people on the ground or escaping the arena, and fighters who fought kano around the two of you
You come to seeing everyone around you and crying realizing that you lost control apologizing for everyone being hurt as he helps you up taking you out and back to your shared home calming you down until you fell asleep in his arms
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