#derek morgan x reader platonic

[book-place]

Run Boy Run

Warnings: kidnapping, blood, violence, mentions of killing, weapons, cursing, let me know if I missed any :)

Pairings: BAU x reader platonic

*not my gif*

Summary: When things get out of control, your team is always there to have your back

A/N: Welcome to book place’s one year event!!

Inspired by: Run Boy Run by Woodkid

Please don’t plagiarize my work, you may reblog if you like but I’m asking that you don’t steal my hard work

Run boy run, this world is not made for you

As a groan escaped your lips, you slowly- and painfully- peeled your eyes open, squinting against a light that, though dim, was still enough to hurt your already pounding head.

With slightly blurred vision, you allowed your eyes to sweep over your surroundings. You sat on a small wooden chair in the middle of a room with your hands tied to the back- with rope no doubt, you could tell by the way it was rubbing into your already raw skin. The room you were in was small with no windows, only one door that sat directly across from you.

And then, all at once, the events leading up to how you got there all came crashing down on you at once.

You had gotten a lead on the unsub for your current case while down at the police station to a location that was only a few minutes away from where you had been. Your team was out getting some much needed rest- something you had tried and failed at doing- so you decided to go over by yourself. It was only to scope the place out, though. You would never have gone in alone, you weren’t that stupid.

Apparently though, the unsub had gotten some sort of tip off that you would be there- or you just hadn’t been as discreet as you thought you had been- and had been able to sneak up behind you.

The last thing you remembered before blacking out was something hard and cold- like a pipe- hitting the back of your head in one hard bash, and the sound of a deep chuckle before the darkness had fully taken you.

“Well, well,” The voice that belonged to the laughter from your previous memories sounded through the small room and the door across from you was opened, and in stepped a man that you had no doubt was the unsub. He grinned menacingly, “What have we got here?”

Run boy run, they’re trying to catch you

The police station was thrown into complete and utter chaos the moment your BAU team got back and realized that you weren’t there after being informed by some officers that you had mentioned something about a location.

“You’re sure she didn’t say where she was going?” Morgan interrogated the poor officer yet again, needing for his own sake to be absolutely thorough with this.

It wasn’t like you to just leave without telling one of them, let alone for three hours with your phone being left in the station. That part had to have been an accident.

“She had to have gone after the unsub, and he must have taken her.” Spencer muttered, mostly to himself but everyone felt their blood run a little colder at his words.

Derek sighed, running a hand down his face, “You’re free to go.”

The officer didn’t waste a second before scrambling out of the room that had been set up specifically for the FBI team, shutting the door with a soft click behind him.

“Why wouldn’t she come to us first then?” JJ questioned, “It’s not like her to go anywhere without backup.”

“Do you think she’s okay?” Garcia asked softly from the computer screen she had been propped up against the table on.

“Of course she is,” Emily was the first one to try and reassure everyone, “She’s tough. You all know that.”

Aaron and David exchanged worried glances until Hotch stood up from where he had been sitting and sighed, “We’re doing her no good by panicking.” He tried to reel his team back in, “We need to stay focused. That’s the way we can help her the quickest.”

Everyone nodded in agreement, all turning their eyes to the evidence board they had pinned photos up on, the one that the cops claimed you had been staring at for at least an hour before leaving.

Wherever you were had to be on that board, they just needed to figure out what you saw that they didn’t.

Run boy run, running is a victory

“You’re one of them FBI agents, ain’tcha?” The unsub asked, shaking his head with a small scoff, “You thought you could- what? Come out here all by yourself and try to stop me?” He snickered at the thought.

You looked up at him with a neutral expression, remembering from the profile that he didn’t do well with being talked back to. That was oftentimes a trigger for his murders, “I am.” You agreed with the first part, “But I didn’t come out to try and stop you.”

He scoffed, rounding on his heel and pointing an accusing finger your way, “Bullshit!” He seethed, “You came all the way out here figuring that you could bust me for the things I’ve done.”

Still looking unphased, you simply shook your head lightly, “I just want to talk.”

“Bullshit!” He cried again, this time sending the back of his hand towards your face, emitting a burning sensation to your cheek.

You gasped, head flying to the side on impact and tasted the metallicness of blood right away.

Roughly, he gripped your chin between his large hand, holding it in a way that would surely bruise, “Don’t. Lie. To. Me.” He hissed, spit flying out of his mouth and into your face.

Run boy run, beauty lays behind the hills

“Tell me again what we know about the unsub.” Emily said, crossing her arms as she stared intently at the board.

“He’s a white male in his late thirties,” Spencer began reciting without hesitation, “He has anger issues so severe that any little thing will set him off and push him into a killing spree to anyone that could possibly be used as a witness. The only reason he hadn’t been caught yet is because he somehow never leaves prints at the scenes and always flees before anyone can show up.”

“If he gets angry with people really easily…” JJ trailed off, squinting her eyes at the map of the town on the board.

“Then he wouldn’t want to be around them.” David finished, standing up with the realization.

“Oh my god,” Derek breathed out, “How could we have been so stupid?”

Their worry for you had obviously clouded their brains, not letting them think properly about the situation at hand.

“What?” Penelope asked desperately from the computer screen, “What is it? What am I missing?”

“The woods,” Aaron spoke up, “He has a cabin in the woods.”

Run boy run, the sun will be guiding you

“What do you have on me?” The man demanded, taking a handful of the front of your shirt and shaking you violently, “Huh? None of my prints are ever left at the scene! You have absolutely no proof that I did anything!”

“I didn’t accuse you of anything,” You reminded him gently.

“Don’t patronize me!” He snapped, pushing you back into your chair as he harshly let go of your shirt and reached both hands up to lock behind his head as he began pacing, “It’s not like any of them didn’t have it coming! Those sons of a bitches all deserved to die! Every last one of them!”

He was beginning to spiral, and you knew it. There was no other explanation for the blatant disregard for the fact that he had denied committing the murders before proceeding to tell you that he did in fact do them.

“Do you really believe that?” You asked calmly, “What did those people really do to you? Did you even know them? Did you know if they had families? If they were good people or not?” You were pushing him, and you knew it, but you needed to stall, do anything to keep him here instead of going out and killing more people. Hopefully if you stalled long enough, then your team would have found where you were and come to your rescue.

“Shut up!” He stormed over to you with a shout, “I said shut up!” Without another warning, he threw his fist into your face, making it snap to the side for the second time as your lip painfully split open.

“I just want to help you-“

He hit you again, effectively making you stop talking.

Run boy run, they’re dying to stop you

“I want every inch of that forest searched for any sign of a building or house.” Hotch informed the chief sternly, “No stone left unturned. We need to find this unsub and we need to find him now.”

He received a nod in return before the chief turned around and began barking orders to all the other officers, who immediately sprang into action.

“We’ll split up,” The man turned to his team as he spoke, “All of us into two cars searching the most likely spots.”

He received a nod and they all immediately broke into two groups, not wasting another second before scrambling out of the station and into the cars.

“I’m worried about her,” JJ admitted to Aaron and Spencer softly as the three of them piled into the first car, “I know she’s tough, but that doesn’t stop my worrying.”

Hotch sighed, beginning to drive away, “I know, me neither.”

“She’ll be alright,” Spencer whispered, seemingly trying to convince himself more than anyone else, and the other two let him, knowing that they needed those comforting words just as much as he did.

Run boy run, this race is a prophecy

“You!” Punch. “Stupid!” Punch. “Bitch!” Punch.

You spit out a wad of blood after he had finished his miniature meltdown and took stumbling steps backwards, reaching up while out of breath and running a hand through his hair.

“So what now?” He asked, only slightly out of air by that point, “Your little team comes to rescue you and I go to prison for the rest of my life for doing something that shouldn’t even be wrong?”

“Why did you kill those people?” You needed to keep him talking, “Why wasn’t it wrong?”

“Th-they pissed me off,” He huffed out angrily, “They had no right to do that- no right. No right.” He shook his head back and forth.

“So you killed them?”

His face turned into a hard glare once more, “Shut up!” He roared, another punch coming to your face less than a second later.

Run boy run! Break out from society

“There!” Emily called, leaning forward and pointing to a rundown shack in between a bunch of trees, in a small clearing towards the middle of the woods.

Derek pulled the car to a quick stop and they all hopped out, calling to inform the police and the rest of the team.

He began tapping his foot impatiently, looking as if he were about to run in without any back up at any moment.

“We have to wait,” David told him as calmly as he could, trying to mask his own worry for everyone’s sake.

Morgan tan his hand over his head, “We don’t know what’s going on in there, man.” He insisted desperately, “What if-“

“Hey,” Emily cut him off slightly sternly, “No ‘what if’ questions. She’s gonna be safe and so are we.”

Tomorrow is another day

“They didn’t have to die.” Despite being hit over and over again, you couldn’t seem to shut up, “You didn’t have to kill them.”

“Stop talking,” The unsub dropped his head into his hands.

“Why is it you haven’t killed me yet?” You asked.

“Because you could be of some use to me.” He grumbled with a glare.

“Or maybe you don’t want to kill me,” You offered, internally cringing at the thought of possibly of just having pushed him over the edge, “You know it’s wrong.”

“Nah, nah.” He shook his head, “I just- I just don’t need the FBI on my ass.” He nodded along with his own words, “Yeah, just don’t want them coming after me.”

And you won't have to hide away

“Took you long enough,” Morgan sighed impatiently, pushing off from where he leant against the car as soon as the others pulled in with the police cars right behind them.

“I want you and your officers to form a perimeter around this building.” Hotch immediately told the chief, “Nobody comes in or out of here without my permission.”

Quickly, the entire team put on vests and prepared themselves for going inside.

“Let’s go,” Aaron said as soon as everyone was ready, taking out his gun and leading the way into the cabin.

The inside was disgusting and looked as if it hadn’t been cleaned in over thirty years, but nobody focused on those details as they strained their ears to try and listen out for you.

Finally, the sound of voices carried through the floor, letting them know that you and the unsub were in the basement.

Needing only a glance to communicate, they all immediately made a single file with their guns raised and trekked down the stairs, ready for whatever was waiting for them at the bottom.

You'll be a man, boy

Your ears perked up the tiniest bit at the sound of a floorboard creaking from above you, and you automatically knew that your team had been able to find you in time.

All you had to do was stall him for a few moments longer.

But for now it's time to run, it's time to run!

All at once, the team rushed into the only room that had the door firmly closed. And though Morgan kicked it in with ease, there was a rare, dangerous look on his face that could have made anyone he didn’t know shit themselves.

The sight of you, doubled over with blood running down your face, staining your clothes, and making you groan had all of their hearts stop for a minute.

“What the hell-“ The unsub wasn’t even able to finish his sentence before Hotch had cleared across the room and delivered one solid, swift punch to the man’s jaw, effectively knocking him out immediately.

It was silent for a moment as everyone’s chests rose and fall in pants, “There will be no discussion of that.” He said after a moment.

There was a teasing smile on your face despite the gore running down it as you replied with, “What do you mean? He attacked you first. It was only self defense.”

JJ immediately rushed to where you sat, crouching down and untying the ropes that still dug into your wrists.

“Are you alright?” David dropped down in front of you, gently moving some of your fallen hair out of the way so he could inspect you further.

“I knew you guys would get here.” You grinned despite the clear pain you were in, “Just had to stall him for long enough.”

“You actually did a surprisingly good job.” Spencer began ranting, “Normally, he would have killed you a long time ago and-“

“Reid.” Aaron cut him off, “Lets just be grateful that that didn’t happen.”

The man cleared his throat, cheeks turning red, “Yes, of course.”

“Come on,” Emily helped you to your feet, wrapping your arm around her shoulder, “Let's get you to a medic.”

“Hey, guys?” They all paused as you spoke, “Thank you. For coming to get me, I mean.”

“Next time you get kidnapped,” Derek joked with a lopsided grin, “You’re saving yourself.”

Everyone was able to crack a small laugh at his words.

BAU Agents 📁- @kiyomi-uchiha777

#book places 1 year event #platonic #platonic imagine #x reader #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x reader platonic #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader platonic #spencer reid x reader #derek morgan x reader platonic #derek morgan x reader #penelope garcia x reader #penelope garcia #penelope garcia x reader platonic #derek morgan #spencer reid #david rossi x reader platonic #david rossi x reader #david rossi #aaron hotchner x reader platonic #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #jj jareau #jj jareau x reader #jj jareau x reader platonic #song fic #song inspired fic #song imagine #bau x reader platonic #bau x reader

[the-guilty-writer]

The Fake Doctor

Request from anon: Young autistic reader who’s Derek’s daughter and Derek needs Reid’s help with her 

Derek Morgan x daughter!reader

Summary: After babysitting you, Spencer isn't sure how to bring up to Derek that he thinks you're autistic.

A/N: This is very short and really the best I could come up with. I very rarely write young children readers, but I figured out a way to make this one work by making it more Derek and Spencer centric than reader centric.

CW: just lots of fluff

---

Derek looked down the extraordinary long list in front of him and sighed. He didn't normally write a list for the babysitter, but he was worried about Spencer’s child-watching capabilities.

Derek was, for the first time in what he felt was a long time, going out on a date. Of course, your normal sitter canceled last minute due to having the flu. He’d gotten the text that morning at work and was about to cancel his date as well when Reid had offered up his services. Derek knew Spencer was good with kids and you liked him, but your dad was a bit skeptical about if the young doctor really knew what he was getting himself into.

Did a babysitter with an eidetic memory even need a list?

Derek didn’t have time to decide if he should throw it out or not because the doorbell rang through the house. Even though you were distracted by your favorite TV show, you still covered your ears and made a face at the high-pitched sound.

He made a mental note to himself to change the bell to something more pleasant, and walked to the front door to let Spencer in. “Hey, Reid.” Derek let his colleague through the door. “Thanks again for doing this. I owe you one.”

“It’s no problem,” Spencer replied. The two men walked toward the kitchen. “I didn’t have any plans besides reading.” The doctor held a thick book under one arm.

“Well I wrote everything down,” Derek said, handing Reid the list. “But you know how to reach me if you have questions.” While Spencer read through the list, your dad made his way to you. “Hey, baby girl.”

“Hi daddy,” you replied. It made Derek smile - he’d heard from lots of parents that you’d probably switch to “dad” soon enough, but you were still stuck calling him “daddy” and he truly hoped that never went away. “Are you going out with your friend for dinner?”

Derek’s date had been on the calendar for over a week now to prepare you that he wouldn’t be home for bedtime tonight. The unpredictable schedule of his job made you anxious, so when he could let you know about a scheduled event, he put it on the calendar in the kitchen. It wasn’t a perfect fix, but it seemed to help take the edge off.

“Yep,” he kneeled down in front of you. “Dr. Reid is here.”

“The fake doctor,” you said. Derek couldn’t help but laugh and it was only made funnier by the expression on Spencer’s face.

“Yeah, he’s going to stay with you while I go out, like we talked about earlier. Okay?”

You nodded and threw your arms around your father’s shoulders. “I love you, daddy.”

Derek hugged you back tightly. “I love you too, baby girl.” He planted a gentle kiss on top of your head and you went back to watching your show, hugging your arms around your knees as if it replaced the absence of your dad’s presence.

“Good luck,” Spencer said to him, as he left the house.

“You too, kid,” Derek plastered a joking smile on his face to cover up his nerves. It wasn’t his date he was nervous about; he was far more worried about Spencer taking care of you.

---

Spencer sat in one of the armchairs in the living room, reading his book over again for the second time. The only reason it wasn’t the third time was because he wasn’t sure what to say to Derek when he got home. Of course, what Spencer had to say was in your best interest, but that didn’t make it seem any less like he had been profiling you.

Just as he was beginning to revise his opening sentence in his head, there was a click with the opening of the front door and light footsteps along the hardwood.

“Hey, pretty boy,” Derek said with a small but tired smile on his face.

“Hey,” Spencer tried his best to control the nervous pitch of his voice. “How was your date?”

“It was good, actually,” he said. “How was my baby girl?”

“She was good.” Spencer tried to look more casual as he walked closer, but he’d forgotten that your dad knew his tells better than he knew his own.

“Reid, what is it?” Morgan’s brow furrowed with concern. Spencer paused and opened his mouth, but paused before he could go further. “Spit it out.”

“I think she might be autistic.” Spencer searched Derek’s face for an adverse reaction - guilt, denial, anger. What he didn’t expect was for him to say, “Yeah. I know,” and go about putting his coat away like the doctor’s statement was nothing out of the ordinary.

“I’ve known for a couple months now,” Derek continued. “It’s part of why I was concerned about you watching her. She doesn’t do great with last minute changes. It’s also why she calls you ‘the fake doctor.’ I had to explain to her why we weren’t going to see you when we went to see the real doctor.”

“Medical doctor,” Spencer corrected. “And I’m not qualified to diagnose anything, but I can give you an opinion.”

Derek smirked. “Well, I know I already owe you, but I could use your help with special interest research.”

Spencer nodded happily. “I’m pretty filled in on what she already knows after tonight.” He thought about the way your face had lit up when you talked, how excited you had been when he gave you a new fun fact, the joy that radiated off you.

“I’m sure you are, pretty boy,” Derek smiled. “But I know she’d love to know more.” he paused. “And I would like to know more too - about how I can help her.”

“Of course,” Spencer replied. “She’s lucky to have you as a dad.”

“Thanks.” Derek’s voice switched from genuine appreciation to a teasing tone when he said, “We’re both lucky she has an uncle that’s a fake doctor.”

And this time, Spencer couldn’t help but laugh.

#derek morgan fanfiction #derek morgan x reader #derek morgan x daughter!reader #derek morgan x child!reader #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x teen!reader #criminal minds x daughter!reader #criminal minds x child!reader #criminal minds x platonic!reader

[blue-babygirl]

Energy Drink

Pairing: Derek Morgan x college student! Reader

Type: Fluff/Sweet (I think?)

Description: You know you are not supposed to be drinking energy drinks. Derek restricts them for a reason. But it's not like he is around to find out at the moment.

Warnings: stern but loving Derek, somewhat dominant Derek and that's pretty much it. Let me know if I need to add anything.

You stare at the energy drinks in the vending machine near your lecture hall, contemplating whether to actually get one or not. You can practically feel the single-eyebrow-raised stare that Derek would give you if he were there.

Actually, if he were here, you wouldn't even be standing here contemplating this decision. After all, there is a reason Derek doesn't approve of you drinking energy drinks.

But as you hear your friends entering the hallway, you make up your mind and make quick work of getting your previously favorite flavor from the drinks available, checking to see how much time you have before the professor locks the door as your friends get to you and you make your way to into the hall, taking your seats in the middle.

Before you know it, you have emptied the can, recycled it, got done with work, hyper-fixated on cleaning the kitchen, cleaned the kitchen, and are distractedly working on 3 essays at the same time when Derek gets home. You run over to him before practically throwing yourself in his arms, eternally thankful for how strong he is as you realize that you could have both fallen and gotten hurt.

“Someone’s happy?” Derek looks at you questioningly as you cling to him, making you nod into your hiding spot, his neck.

You can feel him chuckle as he holds you while putting away his things near the entrance. The keys into the bowl, his wallet near the bowl, his shoes near the rack, and his briefcase under the table. You can tell everything he is doing as he does it without even looking up from your hiding spot. It’s probably the energy drink.

“How was your day gorgeous? And why are you up so late? Don’t you have work in the morning?” He questions as he walks into the living room and sees the mess of snacks at the kitchen counter surrounding your laptop in stark contrast to the surprisingly squeaky clean kitchen.

But instead of getting answers like he expected, he looks down to see you staring at him with wide eyes before asking what time it was. That’s when it clicks to him.

He carries you around as he closes your laptop against your protests before carrying your pouty butt to your bedroom.

“I was still working on that essay. You can’t just close my laptop like that!”

Your complaints fall on deaf ears as he finally puts you down on the counter of your ensuite bathroom.

“Those essays, not that essay. And I saved them before closing your laptop sweet cheeks. Now, care to tell me about that energy drink you had?” Derek folds his arms as he gives you the look. You know, the look. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, you are bad at lying when it comes to him. Or honestly, the BAU in general. But in this case, that doesn’t even matter because you don’t think before you answer.

“How did you know?” You look at him with big eyes and a pout as you realize that you just told him that you had one.

“Because, sweetheart,” Derek smiles despite knowing he should be scolding you before nuzzling your nose with his, “I know you.”

You pout but give him a quick peck before he pulls away. “I was tired before a 4-hour lecture with the bitc- witchy professor.” You quickly correct yourself, not wanting to remember the task you had given him as he tried to stop his smirk at your almost mistake.

“You have to help me stop swearing! Please, Derek!!” You pleaded, but he still seemed unsure. “How exactly will I be helping you?” He tilted his head and raised an eyebrow suggestively, making you blush but nod. This took him a little by surprise. “You have to use your words Y/N, you know I won’t agree to anything unless you clarify yourself and what you want.” You blush as you confirmed verbally to what you had both talked about with just your eyes not even minutes ago.

“Anyways, I was exhausted so I thought, why not.” You shrug.

“You know why not.” Derek gives you that look. “You get way too hyper for way too long sweeetie. You usually can’t even keep track of time, like today. I got home at around 3:25 a.m. Y/N. You have to wake up at 7 for work and now you are gonna have a migraine. Did you even eat dinner? Or lunch? Anything other than those snacks?”

You are honestly surprised about how late it is, you didn’t even feel the time passing. You try to remember if you ate anything for lunch or dinner but you don’t even remember getting or eating the snacks Derek mentioned. You cringe at the thought of the migraine you are going to have along with the fact that you definitely disappointed Derek and that you are not even sleepy.

Derek sighs after staring at you thinking for a few minutes, making you realize he is still there. At this point, you at least have the courtesy to look ashamed.

“Here is what we are going to do now. You are going to get out of these clothes and get in the shower while I get a few things done. Okay baby?” You nod quickly before making grabby hands at him. He obliges and comes closer for you to give him a hug. He gives you one last kiss on your forehead before leaving you in the bathroom.

“Wet your hair too!” You hear Derek yell from somewhere in the house as you make your way into the shower after undressing and getting it set up.

Not long after you get your hair wet thoroughly, Derek comes into the bathroom and joins you in the shower. After giving you a head massage as he washed your hair and helped you clean up with you returning the favor, you step out of the shower together. You let him cover you in his towel while he uses yours.

After getting changed into some pajamas and having him partially dry your hair with a towel, you get in bed together, finally tired and ready to fall asleep.

“I emailed your manager that you won’t be able to get to work until noon tomorrow.” Derek mumbles tiredly as he pulls you flush to him and snuggles you close.

You turn around in his arms before pecking his lips softly and mumbling out a thank you before you snuggle yourself as close to him as you can. You feel him kiss your forehead making you smile softly.

The last thing he hears before your breathing evens out is a sleepily mumbled, “No more energy drinks.”

#criminal minds #derek morgan #derek morgan x y/n #derek morgan x you #derek morgan x reader #derek morgan x gn!reader #derek morgan x fem!reader #derek morgan fanfic #derek morgan fanfiction #derek morgan fluff #platonic dom derek #fluff

[beelmons]

BAU men salsa dancing headcanons

Rossi is surprisingly good at it, although his movements are more on the stiff side. He does mostly the basic steps, like an uncle dancing at a wedding. He will spin you once or twice and even pull one of those leaning endings just as a show off.

Hotch is stiff, like, spaghetti before boiling stiff. The first time he dances, it's an awkward mess, although he grasped the steps pretty quickly. The second time, he is just as stiff but with more technique, he probably took a salsa class on the side. Basic steps only, playfully spins you off beat just so he can hug you, has a blast because he sees you have a blast.

Morgan is good, mad good. He will know how to spin you, cha cha cha, drop it and reverse it. He was probably forced to learn when Garcia was too shy to go to a class by herself, and surprise, surprise, he was excellent at it. If you are not careful, he might be even better than you. Can take it slow and simple if that's the mood, he is just happy to shake his but a bit.

Spencer knows the origins, raise, and fall of salsa dancing. He knows the names of all the steps by heart, and even the speed at which his body should move. Little problem? It just doesn't. He stumbles and steps on feet time and again, he won't look up from looking at his feet as he recites what the movements are supposed to look like. When he finally relaxes, he can sort of do it well, it's awkward and very basic, it's more you taking the lead, spinning him, and moving his arms, but it's nonetheless fun. He also has a last although he ended up breathless.

Luke is effortless, my man is latino, so you know he was peer pressured into learning growing up. He sings while he dances and will always take the lead. He prefers the simple, more casual steps, though if he gets lost in the music, he will begin to show off. He definitely smiles the entire time like a good performer, and will even do the 'two at a time' steps if any of the girls join you om the dance floor.

Matt is similar to Rossi, he got some of the steps down, but won't go as far as doing over complicated spins. He is elegant and less stiff, since he is tall, like, very tall, it looks a bit clumsy, but he always enjoys himself when he is dancing. He will, however, get tired pretty quickly, even when he is used to all types of cardio, the dancing just takes too much brain effort.

#david rossi #spencer reid #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #luke alvez #matt simmons #spencer reid x reader #derek morgan x reader #i guess rossi is also #david rossi x reader #but like platonic!!!! #luke alvez x reader #aaron hotchner x reader #criminal minds #head canon #criminal minds headcanons

[reveseke]

thinking about the reader being nicknamed as a crow, the crow of the team in fact. Solely known for his job title but also known for being a gift-giver. He just randomly gives whatever little things he finds to his teammates as little gifts that he deems suitable for it; Reid, Morgan, Garcia, Hotch, Prentiss, JJ, and so on.

Garcia and Reid would most honestly have them in a jar or something, sorted. Reid would most likely just leave a few little things in the pocket of his jackets or otherwise in some sort of container orginized. Prentiss would probably have something in her pockets or in one of the shelves. Morgan, JJ & Hotch keep them, but have very little idea what they would do with them (lies, give them to the kids if they feel like it. :D Morgan doesn't even have to give to his kid, he could give them to his sisters if he wanted to tbh.). Rossi probably would just forget them somewhere, same with Gideon mostly and just randomly find them and be amused by it.

Hotch doesn't mind Reader doing it as long as it doesn't distract him from the job. Also check the pockets before boarding the plane because someone most likely has something metallic in their pockets that R has found and given them (including [especially] him if R tended to be absentminded & forget things easily) that would set off the metal detectors.

#made platonic in mind can be romantic #male reader #masc reader #x male reader #criminal minds x male reader #criminal minds thoughts #criminal minds blurb #ftm reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #spencer reid #david rossi #jason gideon

[mxssingmemories]

your instagram, but you're friends with the bau

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yourusername

liked by boygenius, chocolatethunder and 134 others

yourusername he found a goat. everyone run and hide, we're all fucked

boygenius his name is is edgar

yourusername for the last time, HE DOESN'T HAVE A NAME

keepitpg please tell me you kept him

yourusername we did not and now spencer is mad at me

boygenius @/yourusername we could have kept him!!!

chocolatethunder reid in his natural habitat

boygenius that was uncalled for

doublej henry saw this and wants to meet the goat, you're screwed @/yourusername

yourusername

liked by doublej, prentiss and 145 others

yourusername i did what i had to do.

ahotchner I'm pretty sure this qualifies as workplace harassment.

yourusername sorry dad

doublej y/n terrifies me

chocolatethunder same

prentiss same

boygenius same

italiandad same

yourusername i'm flattered

keepitpg it had to be done

yourusername EXACTLY

yourusername

liked by keepitpg, boygenius and 156 others

yourusername welcome to the family of weird ass profilers, roo :)

keepitpg I AM FOAMING AT THE MOUTH

chocolatethunder i want to meet this animal now.

boygenius did you know that world war one made german shepherds famous ? in other words, i can't wait to meet this guy

ahotchner Are you able to bring Roo to the office tommorow?

yourusername that can be arranged, boss

doublej me and @/prentiss are requesting custody of this angel

yourusername permission granted

prentiss SHIT YEAH smd @/chocolatethunder

italiandad I might have made some dog treats for Roo

yourusername you know my address, just knock and roo will love you forever

yourusername

liked by ahotchner, italiandad and 198 others

yourusername i love our dysfunctional little family

boygenius i forgot my socks were purple

chocolatethunder wtf is with reid's socks

ahotchner I appreciate all the work you do for this team, Y/N. We all love you.

yourusername dude you can't just say that i'm crying in the club rn

keepitpg i love you guys :)

doublej <3

prentiss stop i'm feeling things

italiandad Love you guys.

#bau x reader platonic #instagram au #my writing #this was sm fun to make #criminal minds #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #penelope garcia #jj jareau #derek morgan #david rossi

[am-i-obsessed---maybe]

Bring Your Kid To Work Day (BAU x Single Dad!Reader)

This turned out exceedingly long but I couldn't get the idea out of my head so I just had to write it out. I personally really wanna be a dad one day (with or without a partner) and seeing how the BAU parents handle their kids always warms my heart so much.

Wordcount: 5.4k

warning: kidnapping

Summery: Being a single dad is hard. Like really hard, and you thought that maybe bringing your son with you into work just once would be okay. Especially when his school was shut down but...

The blaring of the alarm woke you up from sweet elusive sleep.

You debated letting it ring but your arm went out to expertly turn it off.

7:09 A.M.

you wiped the sleep from your eyes and grabbed your phone from beside your alarm clock, being greeted by the single worst email you could have ever gotten. Your son's daycare was closed.

Your son attended a small local daycare, the entire facility had three teachers and two other employees, all off which —along with most of the kids as of recently— had come down with the flu. You sighed, discarding any thought of getting yourself ready before you found a solution to your childcare problem.

You had to be at Quantico in two hours and the drive alone took almost an hour. You called every single babysitter you knew, you were desperate but none were able to come by on such short notice so for lack of a better option you got yourself ready as fast as you could and went to wake up your son for a trip to Quantico. You just hoped it wouldn't bite you in the ass.

When you finally walked through the glass doors of the BAU offices you were half an hour late and carrying a sleeping four year old on your hip along with a baby bag over your shoulder to go with your usual briefcase.

Your out of sorts appearance got the attention of your coworkers and while you tried to put everything away by your desk and balance your still sleeping son in your arms, Morgan came up to you.

"What's all this L/N?" He asked and you turned and smiled at him, a smile that looked more insane than kind.

"This, is my son who is still sleeping from the drive because his daycare is closed and I couldn't get a sitter in time" You said, an underlying warning tone to your words.

"What you forgot to book a sitter?" Reid asked from his place at his desk.

"I didn't forget, they just sent the email this morning. All three teachers came down with the flu... along with most of the class" You explained and Spencer scooted away from you and the sleeping boy in your arms.

"Calm down Reid, this kid's immune system is like something out of a comic book, he's fine." You said as the rest of your teammates came over to join the scene.

JJ along with Rossi coming to join the gaggle of profilers ignoring their work for the far more interesting show of their coworker with his son.

"Did you talk to Hotch about it? I mean, about him being here" JJ asked, pointing to the toddler in your arms and you nodded. As a fellow single parent Hotch understood enough to give you the okay to bring your son to work, after all it was supposed to just be a slow day to get paperwork done.

Just then he began to stir in your arms and you decided to sit down, adjusting the four year old so that he was sitting comfortably in your lap.

"Hey buddy, good morning" You said, moving some stray hair behind his ear so it wouldn't bother him.

The toddler didn't seem to enjoy being awake though, instead choosing to burrow his head into the crook of your neck, much to the amusement of the rest of the team.

"He's a cute little guy, I'll give you that" Rossi said and you chuckled. He really is.

"He is but he's also a menace once he really wakes up, I'm sorry ahead of time for that. He's a curious little thing and he still doesn't understand boundaries, like at all" You say, grimacing knowing in only a little bit you son would surely be running around trying to find everything he could play with in the bullpen.

Honestly the more you thought about it the worse of an idea bringing him to work was, not that you had much of a choice. It was that or take the day off and that wouldn't have been ideal either.

"Developmentally that's actually completely normal, kids can't actually conceptualize the concept of another person with no interest in them until they're a bit older—" Reid started to explain but Rossi cuts him off.

"You can take my office. That way the little sucker has a limited space to wreak havoc in" He said and you looked at him gratefully.

"You really don't have to do that" You said but he shook his head.

"Don't worry about it, it'll help all of us in the long run, just try not to let him trash the place" He said and you smiled.

"Thank you" You said and were about to transfer your files to his office when Morgan suddenly grabbed your baby bag and briefcase.

"Let me help" He said and you smiled again, thanking him and taking your still groggy toddler up the stairs and to Rossi's office.

About an hour later you went down to get yourself some coffee. It was the first time you left Rossi's office since you got settled and the italian man came up to you to see how everything was going. He'd moved his own paperwork to your desk in the meantime.

"How's the pipsqueak?" He asked and you smiled, pointing with your head to the office.

"He's great, drawing quietly on the floor— and don't worry if he gets crayons on your floor I'll clean it up" You hurried to say but Dave didn't look worried.

"Don't worry about it, are you managing to get anything done?" He asked.

"Yeah, he explored the office for a bit but now he's good. Thanks again by the way, it's a huge help" You said and Dave patted you on the back.

"That's good" He said but turned once he saw his office door open in his peripheral and you heard the soft pitter patter of small feet running down the stairs.

"Daddy! Daddy! Look what I drew!" Your son yelled as he ran into your legs and shoved a piece of paper into your hands.

"It's you and me in your office" He said, showing you the picture of a crudely drawn man and child holding hands in an office.

You bent down to look at the drawing at his level.

"That's wonderful sweetie but it's not my office, you see Mr. Rossi is letting me work in his office while you're here with me at work" You explained and pointed to Dave who gave a small wave at the boy.

"Hey buddy" He said and your son gave a small wave back.

The little guy's running got the attention of the rest of the team including one eccentric technical analyst.

"Well what do we have here?" Garcia asked as she along with Reid and JJ came up to the three of you.

"Aren't you a little cutie" Garcia said, kneeling down to pinch your son's cheeks.

"Guys, this is my son Danny, Danny these are my friends Ms. Garcia, Ms. Jereu and Doctor Reid, and of course Mr. Rossi whos letting us use his office" You said introducing the team to your son but also your son to your coworkers.

"You look a little old to be friends with my Dad" Danny told Rossi and the rest of the team that had gathered around burst out laughing.

"Danny! We don't say that. That's very rude" You scolded him but he looked confused.

"But he looks old, like grandpa" Danny said and you had to hold back from laughing because he had a point.

"Danny, those are the kinds of thoughts we keep inside our heads, not outside" You told him and he nodded. It was a conversation you'd had multiple times before and was easier for him to understand than social rules at this stage.

"Can you apologize to Mr. Rossi?" You asked and he did exactly that.

"I'm sorry" He said and Rossi smiled.

"It's fine kid, I am a relic of a better time" Rossi said humorously.

"Hey Danny do you wanna see something cool?" Garcia asked and that got the four year olds attention.

"Yeah!" He yelled and you were about to remind him to use his inside voice when instead Garcia took his hand and lead him to her famously cool batcave. But of course just as things were going fine the universe had to turn the tables.

"Guys, conference room now, we have a case" Hotch said, coming out of his office and you sighed.

The rest of the assembled team looked at you before heading to the conference room, leaving you alone with Rossi.

"Well that's just great" You said, massaging your temple.

"It'll be fine, we all understand if you stay back this time" Rossi said, walking with you to the round table room.

"I still feel bad about it" You said.

You were about to grab Hotch to tell him you'd do exactly what Rossi suggested when Reid came up to you. He hadn't actually entered the conference room yet and had heard your short conversation.

"You're gonna stay back?" He asked you.

"It's not like I have much of a choice, what am I gonna do? take him with us?" You asked and though it was rhetorical Reid answered.

"You could. You could stay at the local precinct and help me with the geographic profile" The younger man said.

"Reid, I can't just bring bring a four year old with me on a case" You tried to explain.

"But it's obvious you can work while he's around. Besides not having you there with us would throw off the entire balance of the team" To a point he was right. You'd been with the BAU for over a decade and in that time you'd only missed a small handful of cases (most of which because you were too sick to work). The team was used to relying on you.

"Besides most hotels have babysitting services and we'll be there to help you" He continued.

"I'm really not sure, it was enough of a stretch just to bring him here" You tried to say but Hotch came out to tell you both to join the team.

"Hotch—" You started to say but he cut you off.

"I heard part of the conversation, do whatever you feel comfortable doing but your input on this case would be invaluable. The decision is up to you but I'd appreciate it if you joined us for the briefing anyways" He said and you nodded.

"Okay, I'll just go get Danny set up" You said.

"Garcia already set him up with markers and coloring pages in Rossi's office" He said and you nodded, taking a deep breath you joined them for the briefing.

As soon as Hotch began introducing the case you realized why he said your input specifically would be useful. Someone was abducting parents in Seattle but had recently changed his MO and began abducting the kids with them and most recently, just a kid. Hence why the BAU were called in and Hotch was hoping to use your experience from the crimes against children unit to work the case. You'd worked in crimes against children for 6 years before joining the BAU and had the most experience working child abductions. If the unsub had started going after kids you were the the best person for the case. Except of course that you had your own child to worry about.

"Wheels up in 30" Hotch said as everyone dispersed and you went to tell him your decision.

"I'm going with you" You told him.

"And Danny?" He asked.

"If it's okay with you I'll bring him with me. He's a well behaved kid, he won't bother us, I promise" You explained and Hotch nodded.

"Okay" He said.

When you told Danny he would be coming with you he was over the moon. Of course he didn't really understand what you would be there to do but he was so excited he was jumping around Rossi's office.

"Do I get a badge like you do daddy?" He asked and you chuckled.

"Yeah, we can get you your own badge if you want but you have to be on your very best behavior okay buddy?" You asked and he nodded feverently.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" He said.

He was so excited when he saw the jet and then even more so when you pulled a few strings to let him sit with the pilot in the cockpit (mostly so he wouldn't hear the team discuss the details of the case and their theories).

When you made it to the local precinct Danny was so tired from the six hour journey he couldn't walk on his own so you carried him in your arms. You could feel the strange looks of the local officers but you didn't care instead you found a small couch you could lay Danny on until he woke up.

"What's with the kid?" The detective in charge of the case asked Hotch.

"For agent L/N to be here he has to as well" Hotch said and the detective nodded, mostly because you were approaching and he didn't want to be rude and continue asking questions.

"Agent L/N, this is detective Alden, detective this is SSA Y/N L/N" Hotch introduced and you shook detective Alden's hand. "It's nice to meet you" You said, the rest of the team were already divvying up the work with Reid starting a geographic profile, JJ and Morgan going to analyze the most recent crime scene and Rossi at the ME's looking at the the most recent body. This of course left you and hotch to interview the family of the most recent missing child.

"Do you uh— need anything for the kid?" Detective Alden asked.

"No thank you, Doctor Reid's keeping an eye on his as he's working while Agent Hotchner an I interview the family" You explained and the detective nodded.

"Right, well the most recent vic's parents are waiting in an interview room if you wanna talk to them" The detective said and pointed you in the direction of the room.

Spencer was so far into his mind he didn't even realize that Danny (whom was resting on a couch in the room with him) had woken up until he suddenly felt a pull at his tie.

Looking down, it was Danny. The little boy was wiping the sleep from his eyes as he started to speak.

"Where's my dad?" He asked. Spencer smiled and turned to give the boy his full attention.

"Your dad's working right now but he'll be back soon. Do you need something? Are you thirsty? Hungry?" He asked and Danny nodded.

"I want juice" He said and Spencer smiled, remembering you'd told him everything he'd need would be in the baby bag.

"Do you know in what pocket your dad keeps the juice?" Spencer asked but Danny shook his head.

"That's alright, we'll find it together" He said.

Once they did, spencer helped stick the straw into Danny's juice box and gave it to him along with some pretzels he found tucked away with other snacks in the same pocket.

"What were you doing?" Danny asked.

"Oh— I was creating geographic profile" Spencer answered and Danny tilted his head in confusion.

"What's that?" He asked.

"Well it's one of the things we do to find out more about the bad guy we're trying to catch" Spencer said, trying to keep it as kid friendly as possible.

"Are you trying to catch a bad guy now? Is that what my dad is doing?" Danny asked and Spencer nodded.

"Yeah, it's what all of us do" He said and that got Danny excited.

"Does that mean I get to help catch a bad guy?" The little boy asked and Spencer started to sweat, he didn't want to disappoint the boy by telling him was in fact not going to catch the bad guy but he didn't know what else to say. He wasn't going to lie.

"Well..."

"Reid!" Hotch called from outside the room and Spencer had never been happier to see what was going on.

"Just a moment Danny" He said and went to talk to his boss.

"Another body was just found behind the North Star diner on Greenwood Avenue" Hotch said.

"The most recent abductee?" Spencer asked.

"Local PD haven't ID'd him yet but it looks like it" Hotch answered.

"Greenwood is only 1.8 miles from here, it's way outside his comfort zone"

"I know, see if there's any connection between there and any of the other locations" Hotch instructed and Reid nodded, getting back to work.

"Dr. Reid, I'm bored" Danny said once he re-entered the room. For a second Reid completely forgot the four year old was even there.

"Don't you wanna draw?" Reid asked.

"Not anymore" The toddler said, shaking his head.

"I want my daddy" He said.

"Uh, well—" Almost as if on cue one of the rookie local officers came in with you and Danny ran into your leg. Meanwhile the rookie gave Reid some files Garcia had sent over.

"Daddy!" Danny said and you smiled, petting his head.

"Hey buddy, have you been good for Dr. Reid?" You asked and he nodded.

"But I'm really bored." Danny said.

"Well I have to work but maybe you and officer Parker can go to the library across the street? Get something to read?" You suggested. Officer Parker had brought in the parents of the most recent victim. She'd only been on the force for a week and you could tell she was a bit faint when it came to this case.

"Okay!" Danny said and went over to the rookie cop.

"Are you sure?" Officer Parker asked and you nodded.

"Call me if you need anything" You said, you trusted her enough to spend half an hour with Danny and the library was only a two minute walk from the station. Besides you had to go to the crime scene and Reid was obviously out of his depth trying to both work and entertain a four year old.

"Alright" She said and led Danny out of the precinct.

"You seem a lot calmer" Reid pointed out.

"we're getting closer to getting this guy and that means we can get back to D.C sooner" You admitted and he nodded.

When you got back from the crime scene you were able to finally give the profile.

The entire team along with most of the precinct were assembled and Morgan started you off.

"We believe our unsub is a white man in his late thirties to early forties with some kind of fantasy revolving around parenthood."

"He's moved on from kidnapping parents alone to parents along with their kids and most recently just the kid. This means his fantasy's evolving and with it his MO. The first victims were on their way to pick up their kids from school, then two parents out on a date, a family on an outing and most recently a child walking home from a friend's house." JJ continued.

"He holds his victims for up to three days before he kills them, we think this for them to participate in his fantasy" Hotch said.

"And when that doesn't work or they don't cooperate fully he kills them by slitting their throats" Rossi finished.

"This man is already looking for his next victim. following this evolving pattern he seems to have realized he can get what he wants best by abducting only the child so warn parents and schools and question any adult acting suspicious in areas with unsupervised children" You said.

"This unsub has left his comfort zone, perhaps because of police presence and is devolving. He's holding his victims for shorter periods and it is likely his kills will become more erratic." Reid said.

"It's imperative we catch him now before he has the chance to take another victim" Hotch added finally before dispersing the crowd of officers.

You checked your watch, it's been almost an hour since officer Parker left with Danny.

"Have you seen officer Parker?" You asked one of the officers close to you and he shook his head.

"Is everything alright?" Hotch asked.

"I told officer Parker to take Danny to a library across the street, she was getting too nervous to be of any help and Danny really wanted to go out and do something but they haven't gotten back yet and I haven't heard anything from Parker" You explained.

"She has your personal number?" Hotch asked and you nodded.

"Something's wrong, I told her to call if anything happens" You said.

"Go over there, make sure everything's okay, we'll call if anything's urgent" Hotch said and you nodded a thank you.

"I'll only be few minutes" You said and left, trying to tell yourself everything was fine.

Everything was in fact not okay and when you got to the library you saw a police radio on the ground along with a book.

"No, no, no, no" You muttered to yourself as you dialed Hotch as quick as you could.

"Agent Hotchner—" He said once he answered but you cut him off.

"They're gone" You said, panic in your voice.

"What?" Hotch asked.

"They're gone. There's a police radio and a book matching Danny's reading level on the ground but they're not here and— Hotch they're gone!" You said.

"We're on our way" He said. Within minutes the team as well as multiple officers were at the library. The scene was photographed and morgan and JJ went inside to see what could be seen on the security cameras.

Hotch was speaking with detective Alden since one of his officers had also disappeared and Reid and Rossi were trying to keep you calm and walk you through what you knew.

"Did you give them a time frame for when to come back?" Rossi asked and you shook your head.

"No, but I told them to go get something for him to read, it doesn't take long, it— they should have been back" You said and Reid gave you a cup of water to help you calm down.

"It'll be okay, we know he keeps them for up to three days, we'll find them Y/N" Rossi said, trying to comfort you.

"I thought it would be fine, it was only across the street and we're nowhere near his abduction comfort zone, I— I thought he'd be safe" You tried to say.

"I knew this was a bad idea, I should have stayed back, I could have helped you from Quantico, I—"

"Y/N it's not your fault. We'll find them and they'll be fine. JJ and Morgan are going through the security tapes now. If he took them from the street we'll find him" Reid said, putting a hand on your shoulder, something you knew was hard for him.

"I'm a terrible father" You murmured but Rossi heard you.

"You are not a terrible father. You did what you thought was best and as soon as you realized something was wrong you acted on your instincts. You did everything right" Rossi said but you shook your head.

"I brought my four year old to a city with a devolving sociopath kidnapping and murdering children" You replied.

"He has officer Parker with him, the unsub took both of them probably under the assumption that Parker was his mother" Rossi reminded you.

"Yeah, Danny has her until our unsub realizes she isn't his mom and he kills her because she doesn't fit into his delusion." You reminded him back but you didn't have any more time to argue or spiral into your fears because Morgan and JJ came back out of the library with a photo.

"We found him" Morgan announced and you ran over to him.

"Garcia's running his image through facial recognition but this is him, there was clear footage of him using a knife to Danny to force Parker to put down her radio and follow him." JJ said but she saw this wasn't calming your nerves.

"We'll find them Y/N" She said and you nodded, you had to believe her because the other option wasn't something you could even bring yourself to imagine.

Danny sat, huddled into himself in the corner of a dark room. He wanted to scream when he felt the strange man's hands around him in front of the library but his mouth was covered by the man's hand. Now all he could do was cry, hoping you'd come to save him.

"I want my daddy" He cried when officer Parker—whose name he found out was Jenny— woke up. The strange man had knocked her out with the back of the knife once he had her in the back of the car.

"I know, we'll get out of here and he'll find us. Don't worry Danny" She said and Danny nodded. He didn't have any other choice, his young brain couldn't comprehend the alternative.

Soon the door to the small room they were both locked in opened and a man came in. He was pushing 40, with a receding hairline and a salt and pepper beard.

"Hey there little guy, how are you feeling?" The man asked but Danny just cowered into the corner.

"Don't be scared, look what I brought you" He said, pulling out a teddy bear.

"Isn't it nice what daddy brought you?" He asked, crouching down to Danny's height to give him the toy.

"You're not my daddy" Danny said quietly and that seemed to upset the man.

"You shouldn't say things like that, that's very mean. You should say you're sorry" He said, slowly standing up to tower over the young boy.

"I, I— I want my daddy" Danny cried and the unsub gritted his teeth.

"Don't you dare touch him" Jenny said, pulling together all her courage.

"Oh, is mommy getting protective?" The unsub asked, stalking towards where Jenny was laying, hands tied behind her back.

"I'm not— Just don't touch him. You are in so much more trouble than you know asshole. His dad's an FBI agent and when he finds out you took his son—"

"I'm his dad! I am! And if you're not his mother you're not of any use to me" He said, taking a knife out of his pocket.

The last thing Jenny heard was Danny's screams.

An hour later Jenny's body was discovered at a public parking lot at 63rd avenue. Her throat had been slit.

By then Garcia had found a match for the unsub.

The man who took Danny was one Edward Pugh, a 43 year old now single white man. He worked as a part time security guard and was living out of his late mother's old house on 39th avenue in Wedgewood. It was close enough that he could easily drive between his home (which was most likely the secondary location), the abduction sits and the dumpsites. As soon as you had his address everyone was getting ready to head there. You included. You strapped yourself tightly into your bullet proof vest and made sure your gun was loaded.

"Are you sure you want to be there?" Rossi asked and you resolutely nodded.

"There is no way in hell I'm not the first person my son sees once he's out of this mess" You said.

"But Rossi, I want you to lead the negotiation. Everything about this guy tells us he's not going to just give Danny up so, I want you to be the one who talks him down" You said and Rossi nodded.

"Of course, I'll tell Hotch" He said.

When you arrived outside the house the local PD already had the place surrounded within minutes Morgan was kicking down the door and you were faced with the most horrifying sight you've seen on the job.

Edward Pugh held Danny in his grasp, a knife to his neck as he backed into a corner.

"Don't move!" He yelled.

"Don't move or I'll kill him! I'll do it! Don't make me!" He said and you could see the fear in Danny's eyes.

"Daddy" He called and you could see Edward's hold on him tighten.

"Shut up!" He yelled at the boy.

Rossi came up, his gun lowered even as everyone else kept Edward in shooting range.

"Edward, put the knife down" Rossi said slowly.

"No. No. You're going to take him away" Edward said and you had to bite your tongue to stop yourself from speaking. He was right, you were going to take your son back.

"You care about him, don't you? You don't wanna hurt him" Rossi continued and Edward nodded.

"He's my son" Edward said. "But I will hurt him if you don't leave us alone"

"Edward, we just want the boy to be safe. Put the knife down and we can talk—" "No!" He yelled and you could see blood start to drip down Danny's throat.

"You're hurting him Edward. Put the knife down." You said, repeating Rossi's words.

"We won't take him. We just don't want anyone to get hurt. Okay, put the knife down, he'll stay with you just, put the knife down Edward" Rossi said and slowly he did so, though he still had his arm wrapped around Danny's shoulders.

You took a big breath of relief, at least there wasn't a knife held to his throat anymore.

"Daddy, please help me" Danny said, his big eyes watering as he looked at you and you smiled at your son.

"It'll be okay sweetheart. Just do what he says, you'll be okay" You told him. Making sure not to acknowledge his words, knowing it would only enrage Edward.

"You're doing this because you wanna prove you're a good father right?" Rossi asked and Edward nodded.

Garcia had told you all that Edward's wife had divorced him a few years back and right before the killings began she got full custody of their son.

"The thing is Edward, you have to prove that with your own kid. You can't prove you're a good father by taking someone else's child. This won't prove to your wife that you can be a father and it definitely won't prove it to the court" Rossi explained.

"Let the child go Edward. Let him go back to his father" Morgan said. carefully lowering his gun as did the rest of you.

"You did good Edward. Cooperate and that just might change your wife's mind" Rossi said and slowly Edward's arms fell from around Danny's shoulders.

You quickly holstered your gun and dropped to your knees, arms wide open allowing Danny to run into your embrace.

"Daddy!" He cried, all the fear and pain coming out in sobs. You heard Morgan cuff Edward and the police take him away but your focus was entirely on your son.

You pet his head and back, kissing his cheeks and whispering comforting words until he slowly calmed down enough for you to take him to the medics.

He refused to let go of you, something you very well expected along with the sudden shyness and anxiety around anyone he didn't know. Surprisingly enough when Reid came to check on you both he ran into his arms and hid his head in the crook of his neck, just like he did with you. It seemed the time they spent together in the precinct firmly situated Reid as someone safe.

Once Danny was cleared by the medics you took him back to the precinct sitting with him, playing with some of the toys you kept in his baby bag.

"Y/N" Hotch said, coming into the room and getting both your and Danny's attention. Danny scooted closer to you but didn't do anything else as you stood up to meet your boss eye to eye.

Hotch tilted his head towards the door, he wanted to talk outside but as you were about to follow him out Danny grabbed your pant leg.

"No! Don't go!" He cried and you had to steel your face so you wouldn't begin to sob all over again.

"Don't worry buddy, I'll be right outside" You tried to explain but he wasn't having it.

"No! No! don't go!" He cried and you sighed taking him into your arms to try to calm him down.

"Is it urgent?" You asked but Hotch, somewhat surprisingly shook his head.

"We'll talk about it on the jet" He said and you smiled thankfully.

He understood. So did the rest of the team when you began taking more days off, sometimes because like before childcare plans fell through and sometimes simply because you needed time with your son. But either way they understood.

#criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #bau x reader #male reader #bau x male reader #reader insert #derek morgan #spencer reid #jennifer jareau #aaron hotchner #penelope garcia #david rossi #parental rossi #parental hotch #fbi agent reader #bau reader #single dad reader #fluff #angst #platonic reader insert

[platonicfanfiction]

Criminal Minds

Christmas Countdown 1

Echo [Teen!Reader] (F)

Coming Out [Asexual!Reader]

How Do You Know (M)

Underestimate Me (M)

Kid [Rossi!Daughter]

Mental Health Day [Rossi!Daughter]

Pro Fighter (F)

Happy Birthday (F)

Do You Want Me (Dead?) [Reid!Brother]

Hotch's Punishment (F)

Potential [Teen!Reader]

True Shock [Short!Reader]

Afterglow [Non Bau!Reader] [TW]

Survivor (F)

Hotch’s Daughter [Bau!Reader]

Family [Bau!Reader]

Love Is All You Need [Bau!Reader]

Sweet Pea [Hotch!Daughter]

Support System [Bau!Reader]

#criminal minds x reader #bau!reader #bau x reader #spencer reid x reader #aaron hotchner x reader #platonic x reader #male reader #platonic reader #non binary reader #derek morgan x reader #emily prentiss x reader

[overtrred28]

A life for a life |Derek Morgan x platonic!reader

Summary; while chasing down an unsub, reader has to make a haste decision on whether to take the kill shot, making it their first. 

Pairings; derek morgan x platonic!reader, bau team x platonic!reader (gender neutral, no direct pronouns used)

Warnings; guns used, blood, typical cm plot things, fluff, angst and sadness wrapped into one.

Words; 1.2k

Not my gif; @just-my-fandom​

Once the team had figured out who the unsub was, they split up between his home and work addresses, racing against the clock towards each. Morgan, Spencer and yourself were currently heading to his house with Garcia on the phone still spitting out random facts about him.

 The SUV pulled up outside the small house, the three of you jumping out straight away. 

“Reid, you take the back entrance.” Morgan instructed, Spencer running around the side of the house instantly. “You take the kitchen entrance and I’ll take the front.” You nodded at him, giving him a fist bump before taking off, it was your way of saying “be safe” without words. 

You stayed quiet and low as you travelled around the west side, looking through the windows for any sign of the unsub. 

“I got him. He’s in the living room with Carrie.” You whispered into your radio, spotting him and the missing girl through the side window. You continue until you get to the door. Derek’s loud voice can be heard throughout the whole house. 

“Samuel Rogers! Drop the weapon and let Carrie go!” 

You twist the handle of the door slowly, attempting not to make any noise as you open it easily, stepping inside the house quietly. You had your gun raised, checking each corner before you found yourself at the edge of the kitchen and the living room. Derek was directly in front of the unsub, gun trained at him as best as he could with the unsub moving back and forth, arms tight around Carrie’s neck. Spencer was only 2 feet away from you, standing between the dining and living room, doing the same as you, standing silently behind them in case things went south. 

Derek was talking to him, trying to calm him down and encouraging him to let her go but he wasn't budging. “Give it up man, let her go. Your plan didn’t work.” Morgan kept saying to him. Your gun was pointed directly at him from behind, Samuel being unaware of the two agents currently behind him. 

“SHUT UP!” Samuel yelled, squeezing Carrie tighter in his arms, pointing his gun directly at Derek’s chest. 

Adrenaline was pumping through your veins, heartbeat pounding in your ears as you stood closer to an unsub than you ever have before. Your finger was pressing on the trigger and within seconds a shot was fired, your arm jolting back as your own gun fired. Your eyes were squinted shut, not seeing directly where it was fired. 

You opened your eyes seconds later, spotting Spencer moving closer to Samuel’s body checking for a pulse, Derek reaching forward to move Carrie out of the way. Your eyes then travelled to the lifeless body on the ground, spotting the bloody hole in his forehead. Your breath left your chest, arms still raised with your gun in your hands.

This isn’t the first time you’ve shot someone while being in the FBI, normally opting for the shoulder or the thigh, pretty much just knocking them down. But this was your first kill. The first time your shot has killed someone else. You were frozen in your spot, watching the scene unfold before you as the rest of your team showed up, moving Carrie out to an ambulance and covering Samuel’s body with a white sheet.

A soft hand on your shoulder finally broke you from your trance, you blinked and the air finally returned to your lungs. 

“Y/N.” Derek called out softly from beside your ear. He reached out and placed his hand on your extended arms, lowering them and removing your gun from shaking hands. “It’s okay.” He whispered and your head dropped, playing back the same moment over and over again. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and walked you out of your head, guiding you to stand next to one of the SUV’s. 

You were in a state of shock, staring down at the pavement while people walked past you, sirens rang and lights flashed in the street, neighbours coming out of their houses to look at the spectacle happening in their street. 

“Hey.” Derek appeared in front of you again. “You okay?” His voice was soft and calming. You kept your head down. 

“I- I’ve never killed anyone before. I didn’t want it to end like that.” You shook your head, eventually meeting his soft eyes with your sad ones. 

“I know. I know, kid.” He consoled you. “I also know that you saved my life.” He held your shoulder again, pulling you closer to him. 

“Well yeah but-” You looked down again, sighing deeply. 

“No buts. Look at me.” He instructed but you didn’t. He used his hand to grab your cheek softly, pulling you up to meet his eyes again. “You did what you had to. Okay?” He was telling the truth but there was part of you that knew it could’ve ended differently and he sensed this. “Okay?” He asked again. 

“Okay.” You sighed, nodding your head. 

“Come here.” He pulled you into a soft hug, holding your head against his chest as you wrapped your arms up under his shoulders. You didn’t care if people or your team saw you hugging in the field, they knew how close you guys were. He was like your big brother and your best friend rolled into one. He was close to Spencer in a similar way, everyone including yourself knew that. But he was the first to take you under his wing when you joined the team not that long ago, finding comfort in you and your presence; you felt the exact same. 

“Thank you Morgan.” You pulled back from the hug, smiling softly up at him. 

“Anytime Y/L/N.” He ruffled your hair like he always did. “Let’s go get a drink.” He laughed slightly, brightening the mood. You nodded, never passing up the chance to hang out with your team in a fun setting. 

You had all made your way back to the hotel you were staying at, taking some time to get yourselves ready before heading down to the hotel bar. You were the last to arrive, taking a little extra time in the shower to wash the day off. As you walked down the stairs into the bar, the whole team turned to look at you, cheering lightly as they said hello. Your face changed quickly from happy to confused. You walked closer to them, standing next to Derek. 

“What’s going on?” You looked at him, whispering through a smile. His own smile grew larger as he handed you your favourite drink. 

“To Y/N,” Everyone raised their glasses. “For saving my life today.” He continued and wrapped his empty arm around your shoulder. Everyone clinked their glasses together, making sure to smile and make eye contact with you. “Thank you, I’m proud of you.” Derek whispered in your ear, placing a kiss on your temple as the rest of your team talked amongst themselves again. 

The rest of the night was spent talking,laughing and drinking with your newfound family. It was a tough case, especially for you and tonight was exactly what you needed.  

#criminal minds #derek morgan #criminal minds imagine #bau x reader #derek morgan x platonic!reader #derek morgan x reader #derek morgan x you #y/n

[entrop-y]

—becca fitzpatrick, crescendo 

DEREK MORGAN AND SPENCER REID: SEASON 11 EPISODE 11, "ENTROPY"

#spencer was definitely a little in love w derek in season 11 and it HURTS #even platonically this hurts so bad #the tear in the last gif #OUCH #spencer reid #derek morgan #moreid #moreid gif #criminal minds gif #Criminal Minds #cm #criminal minds gifset #spencer reid gif #spencer reid x reader #lgbt

[book-place]

Christmas Catastrophe

Warnings: fire, let me know if I missed any :)

Pairings: BAU x reader platonic

Request: Criminal Minds

Request by: @bringinsexybackk69

*not my gif*

Summary: Things go very, very wrong when you and your team try to prepare for a holiday party

A/N: Welcome to day 8 of Book Places 12 Days of Christmas Celebration

Please don’t plagiarize my work, you may reblog if you like but I’m asking that you don’t steal my hard work

“Oven on fire! Oven on fire! I repeat: the oven is on the fire!” Penelope screeched, stumbling away from the burning object as the rest of you came charging into the room.

“I gave you one instruction!” You yelled over the rapid sound of the fire alarm as you quickly took towels and waved them around while you jumped to try and clear the air of smoke, “Don’t burn my house down! How hard is that for you to try and do?”

Derek was quick to grab the fire extinguisher and open the oven before spraying all the white foam into it.

“Roughly two hundred fires are started on Christmas each year,” Reid coughed out, “But those are from trees, not burnt food!”

“Okay, okay, everyone calm down,” JJ spoke, taking charge alongside Morgan, “We just have to make sure this fire gets out.”

You, Penelope, and Spencer all scrambled to open up some windows to fan out the house and JJ and Morgan put the last of the fire out.

When the fire alarm finally stopped blaring, you all turned and glared at Penelope, who gave a small shrug of her shoulders and squeaked out, “Oops?”

Morgan ran a hand down his face and sighed, “Remind me again why we agreed to let her do the cooking?”

“Because I normally don’t burn things.” She exclaimed with a pout and the cross of her arms.

Emily then walked in holding a cake, only to stop in her tracks and look back and forth between all of you in your disheveled states with wide eyes, “I left you all for five minutes and you managed to do what exactly?”

You sighed dramatically, “You don’t even want to know.” You threw Garcia a playful wink so that she knew that you were all just messing with her and weren’t really mad, to which she let out a long breath of relief.

“What should we do about the dinner now, though?” Spencer asked, and all your heads slowly turned to the burnt dishes in front of you.

-•-

“Go! Go! Go!” You screamed, pushing a shopping cart down the aisle as fast as you could, ignoring the people that jumped out of your way and the judging glares you received from them.

Penelope and Spencer jogged right beside you, grabbing and throwing random things into the cart that would be used to remake the dinner as quickly as possible.

“Come on, guys,” Derek stressed through speaker phone, “Hotch and Rossi will be here really soon, we have to make sure this is ready by then.”

The three of you picked up your pace even more, if that was possible, scaring a young worker half to death at the check out as you begged him to hurry up before making your way back to your home.

You threw open the door and made a beeline to the kitchen.

Morgan, JJ, and Emily immediately followed behind you and helped get to work immediately with the others.

Everyone had a job, any job- besides Garcia, who was banned from working at the oven- and you all rushed through making a dinner that very well should have taken at least two hours.

Right as you guys put the final trays on the counter, a knock rang through your home, bouncing off the walls before it reached your ears.

You all froze, glancing back and forth at one another and the food before all slowly making your way towards the door.

When you opened it, Hotch and Rossi blinked once at the guilty looking sea of people before their eyes narrowed, “What happened?” Hotch asked automatically.

“Nothing! Nothing!” Penelope examined all too quickly, causing you to slap a hand over your face.

“Everything is completely normal!” Reid continued, causing JJ to face palm as well.

They looked back and forth between all of you once more before Rossi shrugged and stepped in, “Whatever, I’m hungry.”

You led them both in, only for everyone to freeze in their tracks as the familiar screeching fire alarm filled your ears.

“We did it again!” The six of you screamed in panic, stumbling your way back to the kitchen and leaving behind and confused Aaron and David who shared a glance as they listened to you all scream and scramble around the kitchen.

They both shrugged, moving to take a seat on the couch and turned the television on, settling back as they allowed you all to panic by yourselves.

“Do you think it’s a bad time to tell them that we forgot the pie?” Rossi asked.

“Eh,” Hotch shrugged, “They’ll figure it out eventually.”

#book places christmas event #platonic #platonic imagine #x reader #bau x reader #bau team #bau #bau x reader platonic #spencer reid x reader platonic #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader platonic #emily prentiss x reader platonic #aaron hotchner x reader platonic #david rossi x reader platonic #derek morgan x reader platonic #penelope garcia x reader platonic #jennifer jereau x reader platonic

[the-guilty-writer]

Everywhere

Request from anon: You asked for requests for Morgan and i shall deliver! i love that man so much, he is too underrated. 

How about Morgan with a reader who is trying to hide/push trough a work injury? maybe reader doesnt even realise how bad their injure really is untill he points it out? 

bonus points if reader nearly faints :))

Derek Morgan x GN!platonic!reader

Summary: Reader tries to push through a work injury, only to have it hit them at one of the worst times.

A/N: more blurb length, but oh well. Was gonna make it fluffy and it ended up being angsty, but oh well again. 

CW: Spitballs, reader gets stabbed, reader and Morgan are both wearing guns, Morgan uses his, reader almost faints (bonus points)

---

When you applied to the FBI Academy, you were well aware of what you were signing up for - not just the 20 weeks of intensive training, but the job that would come after. You thought your first job as a S.W.A.T. agent would be the most dangerous, but when you joined the BAU a few years later, you realized there was a whole world of hurt out there you hadn’t seen.

When you entered the unsubs house, you’d been prepared for many things: a hand-to-hand take down, a knife, even a gun to be pointed towards your face. What you hadn’t been prepared for was a spit bill.

Yep. It was a little round wad of chewed up paper that did you in. The unsub managed to land it right in your eye, catching you off guard. Then they moved in with an expected attack and you found yourself with a knife in your shoulder, on your dominant side, no less.

That was months ago. You were finally allowed back in the field after being cleared by two different doctors and a physical therapist. The most recent cases hadn’t been heavy on the tactical side, and the team made sure to put you in the “easiest” position possible. You were hardly having to take painkillers. All seemed well.

It wasn’t usual for the team to be on a case for more than three or four days at a time, but it happened, and after spending your fifth night on a bad hotel mattress, you admitted (but only to yourself) that the pain in your shoulder was more intense than usual. As the day went on, it only intensified, and you didn’t want to cloud your brain with medication.

“You okay?” Morgan asked, when you climbed into the passenger seat of the SUV. Hotch had tasked the two of you with interviewing a potential witness.

“Of course,” you said. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Morgan blinked. “You’re opening doors with your better shoulders and you winced when you got into the car,” he said.

“Just a little sore,” you replied.

Morgan didn’t believe you for a second, but he let it go.

---

The last thing you expected when Morgan pulled over to park in front of the witness’s house was to see the unsub making a run for it down the street.

“Morgan!” you pointed to the man running down the street. The surge of adrenaline triggered the instinct of raising your bad arm. Pain radiated from the site of your injury, around your back, and into your spine. You tried best not to let it show on your face.

“I see him,” Morgan replied. He whipped the SUV onto the front lawn. The sudden movement of the car caused the agony to spread further through your body.

Still, you didn’t hesitate to jump out of the car, adding another impact to the injury. When Morgan sprinted down the sidewalk, you followed him. Every movement of your arm built a silent scream in your chest. The force of your feet hitting the pavement as you ran amplified the sensation. The sidewalk came to a corner, and you reached towards the holster on your hip, only to see black as you tried to wrap your fingers around the grip.

Your body had enough. Weakened knees crumbled and you staggered down to the pavement. Ever exhausted lungs heaved and gasped as vocal chords that were suppressing howls of hurt strained to stay silent. Your fingers were spread wide to keep you steady, palms pressed bloody on the rough cement to keep you upright. Three shots rang through the air and echoed in your ears long after the sounds should have been gone.

“Hey,” Morgan’s voice broke through the noise. Gentle hands supported you onto your knees. “Hey, look at me.”

Somehow you gathered the strength to look at him. “Tell me where it hurts.”

“The unsub-”

“Tell me,” Morgan cut you off, “where it hurts.”

Your heart stopped for a moment. The knot in your throat unraveled. Tears spilled from your eyes. You collapsed into strong, protective arms. 

“Everywhere.” You only had the strength to whisper. “It hurts everywhere.”

#derek morgan fanfiction #criminal minds fanfiction #derek morgan x reader #derek morgan x platonic!reader #criminal minds x reader #derek morgan x y/n #criminal minds x y/n #criminal minds x platonic!reader #criminal minds #derek morgan x gn!reader #criminal minds x gn!reader

[velvtrix]

Bittersweet notes

Aaron Hotchner x child!reader

TW: angst, mentions of violence, guns, knifes, glass, Foyet, trauma??? neglect(I think), death, mentions of panic attacks(past), little bit of yelling, ooc most likely.

wc- maybe over 500 i forgot

a/n: trying out a new writing style, really slow in updating. Lmk if I missed any warnings I should add. Reader should be around 11-12. Gn!reader

"Music expresses that which cannot be said on which it is impossible to be silent on." -Victor Hugo

You stood by the musical hall, on your phone trying to text your father before you had to put it away. It was finally the day of your performance and no sign of him showing up. Restlessly you pulled your phone again while clicking on the contact;

Dad :)

Out came out messages only sent from you.

Leaving home soon!

Are you gonna pick me up?

Nvm babysitter offered to drop me off

Dad? You there????

Hello?

Saving you a seat, the usual

Are you gonna come?

I have to enter the building soon, won't be able to text

Dad?

Going inside, remember it's stage 4, seat 20, love you

Your finger hit the erase

You're still coming right?

"Hey y/n ! Hurry inside you have to change, you're the closing musician."

You looked up at the sound of your name, "mhm I will, I just need to make a quick call, I'll be there in a bit." The person simply shrugged and left as you clicked dial.

A few seconds passed by and as you were about to hang up the call connected.

Hotchner.

Dad?

Y/n? Why are you calling did something happen.

A sudden pang ran through your heart, you ignored the feeling before answering

Uh no I just thought you were- anyways are you doing a case right now?

No I'm, I'm with Beth, are you sure you're alright? Is Jack alright?

Jack's fine! He's with the babysitter and I'm- I'm at-

"Aaron is everything alright? They've already called our table."

You could hear Beth's voice linger with a bit of worriness, whether it was something bad happening or their date being ruined.

Listen y/n I have to hang up now, I'll check your messages afterwards if that's okay?

You choked back a sniffle,

Y-yeah no that's fine by me, have fun.

Love you y/n

Mhm

When the call ended you only shoved your phone in your bag and walked into the hall. It was filled with people, you pushed your way through and made it backstage with moments to spare; walking into a dressing room.

Sighing you decided it was time to change. You pulled out a dress shirt, vest and pants, before adjusting the red tie, the one your father gave you. You sat in the room for a bit before you pulled out the piece you were supposed to play. It seemed like almost yesterday....

You were just a small child who picked up the violin as a hobby. Your mother, Haley, had been playing the piano as a young girl but never really pursued it. Rather than wanting to follow her steps you wanted to be closer to her, and you learned that violinists have an accompanist. Your first lessons consisted of learning the basics, and the years after that was learning how to be in sync with your mother, which was easily accomplished.

You wouldn't say you were a prodigy but according to the public you were, and a good one at that. Haley would take you to small competitions and when you won them, she'd take it a bit further, but she would never make you do anything you didn't want to.

However during the events of Foyet you were in witness protection and dropped the competitions completely, only playing small duets with your mother. It was after Foyet had targeted your family, where you lost Haley, your one supporter, your accompanist, your friend, and most importantly, your mother.

bang bang bang

When those shots were fired you wished. Wished that your father had gotten here early. Or maybe your mother took the gun and shot him instead. Or perhaps that you had been shot instead. Instead of being dragged by Foyet. Instead of his knife greeting you. Instead of the stairs you were thrown against, the glass shards that had entered your palms. Right when he had finally finished tossing you around, he was about to step on your hands, the one thing a musician would care about most, your father broke the door and the fight commenced.

You grimaced at the memory, while you pulled out your brown case. Opening it you were greeted with the slight smell of pine.

"Hey kiddo how's practice going?" Your mom stood by your room frame.

"I'm almost done with the piece! I've been thinking if we could do this one together." You pulled out a sheet, ' Liebesleid (Love's sorrow)- Fritz Kreisler' "Love's sorrow? Why do you wanna play that piece?"

"Cause you used to play it a lot when I was tiny, and this time we can play it together!" You giggled while Haley sighed happily.

"Alright, I'll get ready, don't fall behind now." She walked to the common room, where the piano sat. You ran after her, violin in hand, along with a wide grin.

As she sat down, you stood by the open window, a small breeze flowing through. "Remember, when you play, don't feel forced to follow the tempo. Music is to express yourself, I only hope you don't force yourself to play, my love." She gave a smile before starting to play, you playing right after. In the original piece, both instruments begin at the same time, however there was this small pause when your mother started where you managed to catch her soft smile. It was the only time you got to see her properly before you focused on your playing.

'I just hope that with this, you'll get used to sorrow.' Haley thought sadly.

You sighed as you picked up the instrument and bow, slowly placing it on the desk before closing the case. This competition wasn't supposed to be as big as those you've attended before, but at the sight of your name a few people were interested in seeing your reappearance, and your music.

You walked out, heading for the recording room, where you watched the current person on stage play. They seemed nervous and they were off tempo, it seemed that the accompanist was trying to let the violin shine.

"(Y/n) Hotchner? Right after this person you're up." A worker announced, as everyone's head perked at the last name. "Hotchner? They came back!"

You nodded at the worker before turning back to the multiple screens. Even though there were multiple people attending, you weren't able to spot your father, maybe the camera couldn't reach his seating.

The person on screen ended their playing, a few scattered applauses could be heard. They sheepishly bowed before quickly running backstage where their accompanist followed.

"It's your turn Hotchner, be there in 3." You heard the worker as you turned to walk on stage. Once you felt like you were ready you walked through the curtain and onto the stage, your accompanist following behind you.

You finally stopped walking, faced the audience and held your violin in its rightful position.

"Oh wow it's really them! I thought they dropped music completely!"

"I bet they're going to take this competition just like others, did you hear there's judges here!? This is a lifetime opportunity."

"Let's just enjoy the show, I've missed their music so much!"

You closed your eyes, and took a deep breath.

"Elohim, Essaim... Elohim, Essaim I implore you."

You struck 2 chords before starting the actual piece, Introduction et Tarantelle Op. 43

A minute into your playing you could hear the people murmuring.

"This is their playing? It's so plain, its like it's lost its spark."

"I expected the song to stand out, if they continue like this it's going to be just like everyone else's, painfully average."

'Their words don't matter. I don't care what anyone else says,' You brought your gaze on the audience, slowly looking for a certain spot. Seat 20! And just as you found said location, [video stamp 2:04] you slowed down your tempo, as if you were going to stop playing mid song.

Of course, it was empty

You felt your vision cloud and you repeatedly blinked, desperately trying to stop them from falling.

"(Y/n), kiddo, you know you don't have to do this." Your mother had a sympathetic look as she crouched to your height. "You're free to tell me you're not ready you know, it's brave to go on stage, but it's also brave to say you're scared."

You shook your head, "Nuh-uh! I've been practicing all this time. This is my first as an orchestral solist!! We've practiced and I'm ready, I promise mama!"

At age 9 you were already behind stage, waiting to play the assigned piece, Winter (L'lnverno) Op. 8 No. 4 F minor: Allegro Non Molto

You could say people envied you, being a young kid, and already being able to lead an orchestra. It was all fair, you managed to get into various competitions in such a short time because you practically devoted your whole freetime to practicing the violin.

Of course you enjoyed school, but not as much as the violin. You strive to get better, not only because of your enjoyment, but because you felt like you could connect better with your mother.

"Alright, remember, you're going to kill it kiddo. Enjoy yourself and play the way you want to be known as, not like a machine." She left a small kiss on your forehead as you turned around and went on stage happily.

Your felt the grip on your bow loosen and you immediately regained your composure. Whether it was the people's ill words or your bottled up emotions you took a deep breath and immediately sped up the tempo, catching the pianist off guard. [Time stamp 2:22]

"There it is!"

"Their playing is back!"

"They are gonna do it again, she's going to make this composition belong to them and them only."

"This is what I've been waiting for, the clash of an accompanist and a violinist."

You heard the audience cheer but you only shut them off. You glanced back at the accompanist, who only held a confused gaze, but at the sight of your smirk, they immediately regained their posture and chased after you.

So what.

So what if he's not here, you don't care.

You felt the tears fall and closed your eyes, your tempo neither increasing nor decreasing.

You never needed him, only her!

As your turn came to the end you finished the last note and strummed the violin, dramatically holding your bow in the air, panting out of breath. There was only a slight pause before the audience erupted into applause.

"WOOOOOOOO"

"THEY'RE BACK! THE (Y/N) HOTCHNER IS BACK"

"WE MISSED YOU!"

"YOU'RE AMAZING!!"

You were still out of breath when you put your bow down to your side before walking forward, bowing your head and walked to the exit.

"I've found the one."

Once you were out of the audience view you managed to place your violin on the bench but dropped your bow and fell to your knees, workers and competitors approaching you.

They all swarmed you but you only let out a happy sigh and laughed. The thrill came back and they all applauded you. You stood up, ignored your knees shaking and walked back towards the dressing room, placing your violin away and walking out of the backstage.

You sat down on a bench, watching everyone else. The other competitors were waiting for their results, just like you. Except they were waiting with their family, or friends.

You moved your gaze towards the floor, you didn't change out of the outfit you were because you had hope, hope that he would atleast be waiting.

You saw a figure loom over you and when you looked up you were shocked to see who.

"Spence?"

"Hey (y/n)! Glad I managed to find you, there's so many competitors I thought it would take me forever-"

"What are you doing here?" You cut off his rant, you weren't annoyed, rather you were happy to see him.

"Well I came here to cheer on my favorite musician, why else would I be here?" He waved a little flag that had, "go (y/n)" written on it.

"I'm honored! They're about to come out with the results, will you stay?" You stood up and hugged him, which he returned.

"Of course! I'm here to support you. A-and I also took a few notes of the piece you were playing. Did you know that-"

A swarm of people crowded the wall where a worker was setting up a paper, you beckoned Spencer to follow you. You walked up and pushed your way through, you could hear some sighs, some cries and even some celebration.

"(Y/n)......."

The letters to the right immediately lit your face.

"Mom-"

You turned back to meet Spencer, his eyes widening and your smile slowly faded.

"Spencer, I did it, I won first!" You declared with less excitement.

"That's insane! You definitely worked for it kiddo, get over here!" You walked towards him as he held you into a hug, surprisingly.

You smiled as you started to walk back to the bench you were originally sitting on. You grabbed your violin case and bag, debating whether or not to tell your dad the news.

Just as the both of you walked out the building you heard a small cough from behind you.

"Uncle Rossi!" You smiled brightly.

"How was my little niece! I saw you kick butt up on that stage!" He held you in a fatherly hug, one you needed. If you were to choose who to run to, Rossi would be the number one person. At the loss of your mother he was the one you'd turn to, as you didn't want to bother your dad, who was now a single father of two.

"U-um excuse me!" You felt a small finger tap on your back and you turned around, looking down at the small kid, who turned back to their, mother, who smiled at them.

"I-i just wanted to hand you these f-flowers! Y-your music was really a-amazing!" You took the bouquet of gladiolus from the kid's hands. You kneeled down and smiled softly, "thank you, they're very pretty." The kid quickly said welcome and ran back to their mother, who picked them up and told them they did great.

If that kid got a parent's recognition that easily, how come your father hasn't seen you yet.

"Looks like that kid beat me to it," Rossi handed you a (quite) larger bouquet of flowers, dahlias and camellias. You smiled, slightly struggling to carry all the items you held, but you were nevertheless happy.

"Did you know that kid (y/n)?" Spencer came up to you, grabbing onto your bag, you thanked him and shook your head. "I don't think so. I wonder why they gave it to me."

"Truth be told, I saw them in the beginning and they didn't have those flowers." You gave him a confused look, "What does that mean?"

He smiled and ruffled your hair slightly, "They probably ran to the closest place they could buy flowers after the show ended, all just for you."

You blinked, still confused but grateful, that atleast some people could enjoy your music.

"So how about dinner at mines?" Rossi offered.

"Are you sure? I think I'd have to ask my dad first-"

"Nonsense! You're basically my relative, if anything I'll just stick up for you."

"Oh then, I'd be honored." You lit up. It hadn't been long since you had dinner at Rossi's place, not that you minded, the food was always amazing.

"Great, it'd be a shame to waste all the food that was prepared already." He let out a small sigh, as he opened the door to the car. You walked in and he closed it, Spencer running to the other side to sit next to you.

________________

Once you arrived at the Rossi household mansion, you walked in and was greeted with a few confetti poppers. You jumped slightly, relaxing when you saw the rest of the bau team there, smiling.

"W-what are you guys doing here?" You smiled, for the nth time this day.

"We're here to celebrate, obviously, come on kiddo use that smart head of yours!" You heard a chuckle as a muscular arm draped over you.

"A little bird told us today was your competition and we watched it, you killed it by the way, and then ran over here to surprise you!" JJ sent a small smile at your way. You saw her as a mother figure, she definitely played a big role in getting over your slump.

Immediately a pink blur ran at you and you were held into a tight hug, which you recognized was Garcia.

"Oh my sweet bundle of joy you were amazing out there!" She pecked small kisses over your face, "I held back too much already you were just- words can't describe what I felt during your performance!" She hugged you tighter, if that was even possible.

"Alright baby girl, you're gonna kill her if you continue hugging her." You felt the hug fade away, while you enjoyed her hugs, they could be intense at times.

"I'm thankful for the support, and the surprise!" You thanked everyone, Rossi finally entering his place, with bouquets in one arm and your violin case in the other.

"Now for the best part, Rossi's cooking" Another voice rung through your head.

"Prenti- Emily." You entered into another hug, and you returned it. She backed away and took your hand leading you into the backyard, where a wonderful aroma hit your nose.

Multiple dishes, mainly Italian, sat nicely on the table, a few decorations adored the room, they were probably up by Garcia.

You sat in the middle of a side on the table, patiently waiting for everyone to sit down so you all could eat at the same time. When everyone was eating you sat still, your gaze looking over everyone who was either engaging into small talk or simply eating silently.

You felt the same emotion from the morning rise up, again you held it down, and started eating. Was it the nice atmosphere? Or maybe it was the small talk. No it was probably your imagination, right?

Why did this feel like a normal family dinner.

You finished eating what you could, got seconds if you wanted, and you thanked Rossi for the food, immediately running to the bathroom to wash your hands and ran back to the living room. Everyone looked confused when you came back in, a familiar case in hand.

You were still in your suit so better now than later right?

You stood by the glass doors that connected the backyard to the kitchen, a few small bulbs lighting up your small stage. You unzipped your case, pulling out your familiar instrument.

Rossi, who also had finished his food, stood by the piano, that seemed to almost be outside in a coincidence.

"During dinner, if it's okay, I would like to play a piece." You whispered the rest of your plan in Rossi's ear, who nodded along. He knew how to play the piano, not full protégé but he could follow the music sheet.

You looked at him, who nodded, as you held your instrument in a ready position.

"Elohim, Essaim... Elohim, Essaim I implore you."

You started to play, Rossi following after you.

Nocturne Op.9 No.2

You saw their faces light up at the source of the playing. The atmosphere seemed more cozy and they talked softer, as to enjoy the piece fully.

Your Uncle Rossi was able to keep up, and you didn't do anything out of the norm to keep the nice tone, maybe it was out of your style, but you also enjoyed playing what the composition was intended to sound like.

As the piece ended, you slowly bowed, and the table cheered, especially Garcia, who grabbed Spencer's hand that held the small flag and waved it around vigorously causing him to let out small protests.

You put your violin back in its case and you felt strong arms lift you up in the air, the moonlight shining brightly on the backyard, illuminating the flowers and the gazebo.

"I'm so proud of you kiddo!" Morgan smiled, and swung you around in the air, the cool breeze hitting you.

It was definitely the atmosphere, right?

You can't keep it down anymore.

A small tear rolled down, then another, and before you knew it you were clinging onto Morgan like no tomorrow, sobs echoing through the yard. The team immediately ran by your side, checking if you were injured, but you kept your grasp tight on Morgan, afraid of letting you.

"You're afraid aren't you?"

You looked at Prentiss with a confused gaze, it wasn't too much after your mother's death when she asked you this.

"Afriad of what?"

"Afraid of deep relationships. I know you don't like being profiled but you've tried to stop calling us by our first name. You've closed yourself off and I understand that but-"

"I'm not scared!" You immediately defended yourself, maybe hanging around profilers did have cons, you couldn't hide anything from them.

"I just ask that you try to keep with the first name basis, at least with me. Spencer already knows, I think it'd be easier to try with him too." She held your hand softly but you immediately recoiled from the touch.

"I'm not scared..."

"I know our jobs aren't the safest but, promise me you'll try?" She stood up, awkwardly cleared her throat and walked away, leaving you in shock.

"I'm scared." You sobbed out. You matured way too early, and your own father didn't notice much of it, in fact maybe he was relieved that you did. You didn't require much attention like Jack. Even then you were scared, of losing your father, or even the bau team.

After a few minutes of letting your bottled emotions out, you fell asleep, Morgan carrying you into a spare room in Rossi's house. Emily had briefed the team what you were dealing with an everyone felt sympathy, it was only a bit after 11 p.m when Hotch entered the yard, slightly out of breath, his hair messy, tie all crooked and a shocked expression, rarely ever seen.

"I got a call that, (y/n) is here." He fixed his tie and looked around the yard, just like he would search an unsub's area. His chest rose and fell quickly, lightly panting as he regained control of his breathing. He continued to walk, making sure to scan the area, trying to find something, anything that would alert him that his child was here.

"Yeah, the kids here." Rossi assured the disheveled man in front of him before crossing his arms and raising his eyebrow. "The real question is where were you?" He speaks in a stern tone, it's almost funny how he's the one acting like a father.

Hotch stares at the older man in disbelief. Why is he being questioned? He's the father looking for his child, can't they just tell him where they are? Hotch breaks from the eye contact, sighing as he runs his hand through his messy hair, removing the strands that fell in front of his face. He sighs once more, knowing he wouldn't win this without answering.

"I was with Beth, we had a date planned. Now where is my child." His voice was cold, but a small amount of panic laced his words. The team around him could only sigh, some seemed almost disappointed. Emily and Spencer sent each other confused looks, both communicating with their eyes.

"What, is it wrong to want to spend time with my partner when there isn't any work?" Hotch asked, almost offended. He too had a life outside of the BAU. Normally he was asked to take a break and now they want him to stay focused?

Rossi could only chuckle while the rest of the team looked at him. Spencer seemed to speak up, "Listen Hotch, we don't mind you spending time with Beth, we're all happy you finally are leaving the shell of yours." His tone seemed to become angrier.

"But when your child, (y/n), is having a competition, and goes out their way to also leave their shell, I expect you to be the first person there, not Morgan, Emily, everyone on this team." His words were laced like poison, and Hotch could feel it crawl through his veins and into his heart. His heart that suddenly felt a sharp jab at it.

"Do you know how much (y/n) stayed quiet about?!" Spencer continued. It was quite rare to see him so agitated. "Hey pretty boy maybe you should-"

"No. He needs to know Morgan!" He cuts off Spencer. "He needs to know how much (y/n) cried, how much they hid that their father never looked their way anymore!" He seemed quite affected by this, his own relationship with his father was also like this at one point. Then he just left.

"(Y/n) has been trying, struggling! They've tried to move on to no avail. Yes they've made a big step in attending a competition, something they quit. It would have meant a lot more to them to see their father there with them! They CRIED while YOU were having an AMAZING time with Beth."

It was quiet. Too quiet. The team stayed silent, the youngest in the team had just yelled at their boss but deep down they all were supportive of his words.

"Do you know their favorite food? Their favorite songs? How about their favorite color, their favorite book? What about their grades? Did you know they had over 6 panic attacks and was sent to the nurse at some point. Did you know that they always woke up after them, asking for their father?!"

Hotch stood there, like a deer in headlights, staring at Spencer as he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. How could he have forgotten? The few times you did speak was about the competition. Hell you even asked if you could take Jack that day but he refused, thinking you were just going to keep him home and Jack needed exposure to other people, even if it just was a babysitter.

"Sometimes, you act like (y/n) doesn't exist, and it shows."

Spencer sighed once more before walking , "I hope this is your wake up call, Hotchner." He bumped into Hotch on the way to the house, most likely on purpose as he went upstairs, most likely to go to your room to check up on you.

Hotch stares in front of him, dazed, in disbelief. Had he really not realized how much time had passed? He assumed you distanced yourself because you were growing up. He was quite happy, seeing that you didn't need as much attention as Jack but was he actually hurting you by allowing you freedom? He feels his throat swell as he clears it, slowly looking up at Rossi.

"Have I really been such a bad father? I-I thought I was helping them by giving them space. Have I actually been harming them?" How he hoped that the older man would dispute, telling him no, that he tried his best, but Rossi simply nodded

Had he really been that absent from your life?

"Nothing is so common as the wish to be remarkable." -William Shakespeare

a/n: First time actually finishing a post wooo. Any feedback would be appreciated. I do take requests, just not very speedy at doing them. I'll work on a abt me post and stuff. Hope you enjoyed, feel free to support me if you do it would mean a lot<3

#Criminal minds #Criminal minds fanfic #Jennifer Jareau #JJ #Emily Prentiss #Spencer Reid #Derek Morgan #Penelope Garcia #Aaron Hotchner #Hotch x child!reader #xchild!reader #Daddy Issues lol #Platonic #No fluff only angst #Live laugh love angst #angst?? #live laugh love angst #Idk how tags work

[uranometrias]

✮ꜜ : ❛ you're still a traitor : criminal minds x fem! reader [ pt. 1 ]

pairing: aaron hotchner x bau! reader (unrequited) | spencer reid x bau! reader | s7 team x bau! reader (platonic)

summary: being in love with your boss was hard. especially when there were so many factors surrounding you that made the possibility of being with him, out of the question. for starters, there was your age gap, and hotch was a stickler with baggage that he couldn't quite disclose to you. hotch was a fantasy, always out of your grasp, that is until emily dies. in the four months that followed emily's death at the hands of ian doyle, you found yourself living a life that you'd only ever dreamed about. hotch was careful, but the proof was right in front of your face as he went out of his way to care for you while you grieved. how stupid of you not to realize something was horribly wrong. but now emily was back, and hotch was back from reassignment in pakistan, and you were all on trial, and absolutely nothing makes sense except for the bitter understanding that you were a pawn in a game that in so few words was "way bigger than you." but at least you had spence.

content warnings: this is literally a barrel of angst. reader breaks the skin of her palms with her nails. mentions of slight! anxiety. follows the plot of "it takes a village" aka the iconic "this is calm, and it's doctor" episode. flashbacks x present day! spencer has been crushing on reader for as long as she's been crushing on hotch. hotch is NOT romantically interested in reader. slight! hotchniss vibes (but that's up to your interpretation. jj x reader angst! reader does not react to emily's return well. mentions of unit transfer / bureau resignation. spencer confesses to reader... open ending making room for a part 2! heartbreak, drinking, crying. best friend! penelope garcia + derek morgan. reader has a sister & niece.

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Your leg shakes violently as you sat just outside the court room, hands balled into tight fists as your nails press deep into the callousing skin of your palms. You couldn't say you were nervous, as far as the previous case was concerned you'd done everything you could to save Declan. You'd take whatever suspension they'd throw your way without batting an eye. You didn't regret the part you played, no, you just regretted the team that you were apart of.

It had been a crazy seven months. You remembered when things turned left, back when Emily started acting weird. She was shorter, snappier, she had less patience with any of you. Long gone were the days of wasting your time with jokes and innuendos. She had a lot on her mind, a lot none of you were privy to, and you remembered how you'd stretched yourself. You'd all tried so hard to show her you were there, to let her know that you could be trusted.

Your face contorts into a scowl, it had become your new resting face in the last few weeks. God, you hated how stupid and naive you'd been back then. Now that everything was out in the open, it was almost too obvious where the deception began. What was the point of taking care of people who had no trouble treating you like some disposable pawn piece to be moved to fit their whims. Damn. You were crying again, you'd been doing that a whole lot too lately.

You scrub furiously at your face, and you hate your teammates a little bit more. JJ had gone first, face devoid of any timidity or uncertainty. Long gone were the days of Jennifer Jareau the Liaison, she was a profiler now, one of you. When she'd come back, you'd been ecstatic. The unit hadn't been the same since she was transferred, you'd missed her so gravely. But now, now the sight of her just reminded you of the secret you'd been holding on the tip of your tongue.

Hotch wasn't the only one who had known about Emily.

You feel a hand moving to rest on the top of your thigh, and you flinch violently. You sniffle audibly, eyes moving to rest on Penelope, your God-given solace. Your best friend. She, Derek, and Spencer were the only ones who wholeheartedly understood what you felt. But even still, Hotch hadn't used their feelings to make them blind, the way he had done with you. He'd played you like a goddamn fiddle, and you'd let him. Because you were weak, stupid, grieving, and in love.

Hotch had never been in the cards for you, not that you weren't beautiful, gorgeous, an amazing agent. You had the stamp of approval of both Agents Gideon and Rossi. Erin Strauss had been (by your request) rejecting every request of transfer any other unit had tried to offer. You were an asset to the bureau, and a major part of this team. You'd been around since the beginning. You'd witnessed doe-eyed Spencer Reid join at age 23, full of facts and anxiety.

You'd seen Derek blossom and break out of his play-boy persona, and become someone that other branches of the law fought to have. You'd been around for so long, you'd witnessed so much, and Hotch knew that. Which you suppose is what you allowed yourself to believe was the reason he'd never shown signs of reciprocating your feelings. He was respecting your future, leaving your options open. But those were the delusional musings of a girl in love with someone she can't have. Hotch wasn't into you, and you knew that.

So why, why, why did you let him convince you of the opposite? For even one measly second? And, yes, of course in the grand scheme of things you understood why he did what he did. But it didn't make it hurt less. In fact knowing his duty to Emily outweighed his duty to anything else just made this whole ordeal feel more like a slap to your face. Penelope gives your thigh a reassuring squeeze, and you're pulled from your running mind. You blink, registering her worry.

"Are you alright?" she asks, and it's the first time anyone's asked you that since the first day. You know they were giving you space to cope, which only seemed to reaffirm your feelings of betrayal and loneliness. "We'll get out of this, alright? And we'll-we'll be able to be a complete family again." she proceeds, and serves you right for believing someone understood what was going on. They'd all misunderstood you. They thought your behavior was fear of the team being dismantled. Some profilers you were surrounded by.

"I'm fine, Garcia." you say, and you can't bite the snippiness if you wanted to. "I just want to get this over with, and get the hell out of here." you add, and you're standing up, Penelope's hand dropping limply as you move your seat. You find a more isolated corner, plopping back into the uncomfortable seat, as the legs squeak slightly. Your leg is back to shaking, only now you've taken to chomping on your bottom lip. You don't imagine Penelope's hurt expression, you know without a doubt that you'll cave. And you can't.

Not this time.

Your phone chirps in your pocket, and you jump once more. Your jumpiness was a new attribute triggered by the amount of sleep you hadn't been getting. Pulling it out you see that it's a call from your big sister, and you curse under your breath. You were supposed to be watching your niece so your sister could pick up an extra shift. None of you had really expected for things to go this far.

"Hey..." you wince, because you can hear the heaviness of your feelings ladled over your words.

"Hey, are you alright? I got a call from Spence." and you're surprised. You look up, searching for the brunette anywhere in the vicinity, and find that he hasn't shown up yet. It's a bit of a shock, especially for someone as punctual as Reid. You did however spot JJ still meandering about, and she's not looking tense at all. Despite your anger towards her, you couldn't deny that she'd quickly fallen into the role of a profiler. It fit her almost like a glove.

"Spencer called you?" you ask, and you hear the tension in your sister's sigh. You imagine that she must be exhausted. Your sister did a lot, and managing a blossoming family was hard. Your niece was five, and she had a new addition to the family on the way. Which was why it was so important for you to be there on the days she needed you to watch your niece.

"Yes, he said something about..." your sister lowers her voice. "Emily." she questions, and you find your head nodding despite the fact she can't see you. "Are you alright?" she asks again, and this time she emphasizes how important it is for her to hear directly from your mouth the state of your wellbeing. Your sister seemed to always see right through you, it was a wonder she wasn't the one in the FBI.

"I'm-" you trail off before you can lie. "I'm sure if they could they'd disband the unit." you whisper, and you look up just as Derek is exiting the court room, Penelope looking terrified as she takes his place. Derek scans the room before he spots you, and his eyes soften. JJ approaches him and the two seem to chat animatedly. Still they look so serious, there was no room for smiles and banter today.

It's not long though before they're looking at you again, and you know that they know. Your self isolation wasn't something you were exactly being subtle about. You immediately look away, focusing in on what your sister was saying. "Bad decisions or not, they're no good without your unit." she says, and pride still manages to swell up inside of you. "You guys do good work. You work because you're together, everyone plays their role." she proceeds, and it's then you shatter.

Play your role. What role exactly did you play? Hotch was the stoic leader that somehow seemed to play the role of pseudo-father so well for every member of the team, with the exception of Rossi and Derek. Derek, was the shoe-in for promotion. The older brother who teased you relentlessly, but would fight til his last breath to protect you, and he always did. JJ, the pretty girl. The one who everyone on the team at some point had been attracted to. But more than that, she was resilient, a subtle glue that kept your unit running.

You quickly slot through everyone else's roles in your head, and huff. What were you except the odd-woman out. The dummy with a crush on your unit chief, and too much knowledge for your own good. You supposed that was why Hotch had to distract you with exaggerated gestures. If you got out of your feelings and really thought about it, you knew that if anyone on the team was going to see through the smoke, and uncover the truth about Emily, it would be you.

So he had to handicap you. What better way than by hanging the possibility of a romance in your face. Still, it was cruel. Just more proof that this was not the family you made them out to be. "Yeah, I'm not so sure." you reply, and you can hear how disgruntled you sound. It smacks you like a ton of bricks, and it's then you truly realize just how hurt you were by everything. Your sister sighs deeply, and it makes you second guess yourself. Were you being irrational? Unfair?

"I know what Hotch did." she begins, "And it was awful to play with your feelings like that." she expresses, and you feel validated. "And nobody's expecting you to just welcome Emily back with open arms after months and months of thinking that she was dead. You were deceived, and I want you to feel however you want, okay?" she says, and you don't respond, mostly because it feels rhetorical. "Just don't do anything rash without thinking it through alright?"

You don't know what she means by that so your eyes roll. "I think we're well past that, if they find us guilty I could lose my job." you remind her, and she chuckles. You don't find it funny, you can't. Your love for the job outweighed a lot of things, so it had been a no-brainer to help Derek seek out Ian Doyle. You wanted his head spinning on a pike, and you weren't planning to take no for an answer.

two weeks prior.

You were sitting across from Derek, steaming mug of coffee in your head that was more french vanilla creamer than anything else. You held the staged photograph of Declan and Louise. Derek's holding an identical photo, a heady sigh escaping him as you both rack your brains for some sort of bullseye. Something that would point you right in the direction of Declan. "Okay, Emily needed to get Declan a new identity." Penelope says as she walks into the office. She sits in the chair right beside you, arm full of stress balls and files. "So she must have used someone that she trusted." she proceeds.

"Alright, well that's a short list, but it's probably not even written down." is Derek's tired reply.

"Even if it was, she's been so many places, with so many different points of contact. " you speak up, and you take a sip from your coffee, praying it kicks in and wakes you up a bit. "It's not gonna be super easy to track and narrow them all down." you say, and you realize your mistake just as Penelope is placing a file in your hands.

"Oh, tell me about it. Two columns, domestic and imports." she says as she passes the other to Derek, who's looking at you with an amused smile stretched across his face. Serves you both right for underestimating the genius of Penelope Garcia. "I accept your apology, cutie." she says, leaning into you as you grin, smacking your lips in a kiss.

"Hey." JJ's at the door of the office, all three of you turning to look her way as she beams brightly. "Have you guys seen, Spence?" she questions, and you remember how you'd offered to bring him a coffee as a respite from the garbage water they served in the bullpen. He'd shut you down politely asking to reschedule as he was going to be spending his day at the Firing Range. You understood the need, he wanted to protect himself, and the team. He had to get better.

"He's at the firing range." you and Penelope speak in unison, making eye contact, as hers narrow. You knew instantly she would have questions about why you of all people knew Spencer's whereabouts.

"Again?" JJ questions as you shrug your shoulders, her eyes flitting towards you.

"Ever since Prentiss died, he..." Penelope speaks your thoughts.

"Right." JJ nods her head. "Uh... did you guys just get a new case?" she questions, hands clasping together in front of her.

"It's just an old one." Derek answers.

"Do you want some fresh eyes?" she asks, and it's painfully clear that she's still figuring out how to feel more like the team again.

"Not just yet." Derek denies, and he's polite, but you knew why he was being this way. You were all for keeping anything related to Doyle under wraps until you were further along.

"Ok. Um, well let me know." she hums, and then she looks back at you. "Y/N, can I..." your eyebrows raise as she trails off. "Can we talk? It'll only take a second." she hopes, and you look to Derek and Penelope for a moment.

"We won't do anything big without you." Derek promises, and you nod, closing the file, and handing it off, before you stand to your feet. You follow JJ out of the office, and down the hallway, stopping just before you reach the heart of the bullpen. You look to her expectantly, a bit confused, but not on edge. You had missed JJ, and in the two months she'd been back, it'd been pretty hard to get some real time with her. You'd hoped a break in the case would help to change that.

"Everything okay, Jaige?" you ask, and you witness how she exhales in relief right in front of you.

"God, it is now." she says, and your eyebrows jump up. She seems to understand the confusion on your face as she lets out a chuckle, dispelling more of her own tension. "You've been calling me Agent Jareau since I got back... not JJ and definitely not Jaige." she explains, as it seems to register for you. "I guess I was just a little worried I'd done something to make you mad at me." she admits, and she's clearly sheepish.

"Oh." you chuckle yourself, and you reach out to hold her shoulder. "No, you've done nothing wrong." you promise. "I've just been a bit in my head these last few weeks, but I'm really glad you're back." JJ beams at your words, and all the remaining tension in her posture dissipates instantly.

present day.

"Hey, everything alright?" you look up, pulled from your thoughts at the presence of Spencer Reid. He's holding a medium cup of a steaming liquid that you can only assume is coffee, and you find yourself smiling despite yourself. "I remember you asked me a few weeks ago about coffee." he holds it out, and you're quick to press your phone to your shoulder, neck craning slightly as you take it.

"Thanks, Spence." you mumble, and you can practically hear your sister's smirk from the other line. "Could you just give me one second, I'm talking to my sister?" you question, and Spencer nods his head, eyes widening in understanding. You smile politely, and he beams back at you, pretty eyes seemingly brightening before he's making his way over to Derek who's smirking like the nuisance he is.

"Hey." you mumble once he's gone, and your sister is snickering. For some odd reason she'd been dropping hints that maybe the guy on the team you should be setting your sights on was Spencer. To your defense, it wasn't like he wasn't attractive. You'd be an idiot to deny his boyish charm and good looks, but after he'd sat you down and admitted he had a crush on JJ, back during his second year, you'd sort of blocked any potential attraction towards him out of your head.

Now he was just Spence.

"Hey, I should go. I just wanted to check in, Spence made me aware of everything so I've got everything figured out on this end." she promises you, and you nod once more despite yourself. "Just think about what I said, alright? It'd be a shame for you to leave behind such a good job." she finishes, and you don't know how to respond to that, so you don't. "Call me later?" she questions, though you know she's telling you more than asking.

"I will." you reply, and she sounds pleased as she exhales.

"I'll talk to you soon." and then the phone is clicking. You adjust your grip on your coffee, using your free hand to grab your phone, and place it down on your lap. The coffee smelled good, it was from that cute shoppe that sold different pastries and always smelled like cinnamon. You'd been there with Spencer and Penelope a handful of times, and they always made your coffee exactly how you liked it. Still, Spencer had never ordered for you so you await a mishap.

The first sip warms you up instantly, and you're knocked flat on your ass by how on point the drink was. Your eyes snap upwards, looking across the lobby towards Spencer, who's awkwardly sitting in a seat, Derek beside him. JJ was gone now, but you figured she was probably with Hotch and Emily, the three of them had been attached at the hip since the team was "back together". You're certain them being gone was what led you to standing to your feet.

You walk towards Derek and Spencer quietly, slipping into a seat next to Spencer as Derek leaned up against the wall. "I didn't know that you knew my coffee order." you whisper, and Spencer turns to look at you. He offers a half smile, you were certain you'd be passing a lot of those back and forth until the court proceedings were done with.

"Of course I do." he shrugs his shoulders. "I pay attention when you talk." he promises, and you wonder why he had to like JJ, and why you had to like Hotch. On paper, and off paper Spencer Reid was the perfect candidate for boyfriend, plus he never pretended to be into you to keep you from finding out the truth. You both fall into silence, there's not much else to say, but you let his words repeat in your head. I pay attention when you talk. It makes your stomach twist.

"You alright over there, pretty girl?" Derek's voice barely reaches over a whispered volume. It seemed you all were feeling the dreary aftershocks of an ordeal like the one you'd found yourselves in. You look up at Derek tiredly, and you don't understand why he's asking you this, not until you feel the scalding heat of hot coffee singing your skin. Two sets of worried eyes are drawn to your cup, it's squished in your palm, brown liquid streaming everywhere.

"Shit." you hiss, and the cup falls to the floor, you're quick to clutch your burnt hand. God, you were really torn up over this.

"I'll get this cleaned up." Derek promises, and he looks at Spencer as if he was communicating something he didn't want you privy to. Spencer falters, only for a second before he's reaching out for your forearm, and guiding you to your feet. You trail after him, walking down the long corridor, listening out for the telltale sign that Penelope was done, and they'd be calling you next. On your route you pass JJ who looks concerned as she looks between the two of you.

"Spence, Y/N?" she says, and you avert your gaze, you're not sure if you're more angry or embarrassed.

"Sh-she spilled some coffee." Spencer explains, but he doesn't stop walking. "Shouldn't be more than a first degree burn, if she soaks her hand for five minutes, everything should be fine." he is passive as he speaks, eyes never quite meeting hers as he continues to lead you.

"Let me take her." JJ offers, and both you and Spencer are quick to offer denials. She looks hurt but masks it quickly. "It's not like you can go into the girl's bathroom with her, right?" she says and it's then you both realize you've got no other choice. He looks to you, trying to gauge how you'd feel about it, and you sigh. Maybe this was for the best, you could finally get things off your chest with JJ. It was only fair. He seems to clock the instant you've decided, and concedes.

"I'll be right out here." he promises, and you nod slowly. He looks like he wants to say more, but he doesn't get the chance to.

"Spence." JJ says his name a bit more sternly, and he resists the urge to cut his eyes in her direction. He ignores her long enough to take in your ailed hand, he saw the way the skin began to redden and swell. He seems cross as he passes you off to JJ, and you feel a bit silly being fussed over for something as minute as a coffee burn. JJ's earnest in the way she takes you to the nearest women's restroom. You hiss the second the cold water comes in contact with your skin.

You don't say anything to JJ though, losing your nerve the second the two of you were alone. She looks like she's waiting for you to say something though, eyes brimming with some sort of unease. She was reading you, using her new skills to profile you. You suppose that's exactly what pushes you to finally speak. "We said we'd never profile one another." you remind her crossly, and she's sheepish. "Just because you're doing it in your head doesn't make it any less invasive." you keep your wrist in place, hissing silently.

"If you would just talk to me I wouldn't have to go that far." she counters, and you blink. Fair, but you had every right to keep your distance from her. Just because the rest of the team was still more or less unaware of JJ's role in harboring the secret of Emily, you'd read right through her.

"What's there to talk about exactly?" you ask. "None of us want to be here dealing with this." and you take the route of the naive girl.

"I'm not talking about with the trial... and the senators." she shakes her head, and she's almost pleading as she tries to catch your eyes in the mirror. "I'm talking about Emily." she deadpans. "Everything that happened?" she proceeds. "You've hardly said a word to her since she came back." she doesn't want to come off like she's scolding you, and so she takes in a breath before her tone can become defensive.

"I don't speak to ghosts." and it's a quiet little dig that she hears all the same. It forces a tense silence to wash over the restroom, the only sound slicing through the awkwardness is the water rushing from the spout. JJ clears her throat, blinking a few times as she adjusts your wrist, allowing the water to evenly coat your burn. Only a few more minutes of this and you could make your grand escape.

"That's not fair." she finally voices her thoughts with a deep sigh.

"Isn't it?" you snap. "Seven months we thought she was dead." and you suppose that was a mistake of hers, getting you started. "Pretty lucky that you were off at the Pentagon, right?" you ask sourly. "Or was it lucky that you were in on the whole scam? I mean you were at the funeral, but you didn't have to cry, you didn't have to grieve." you accuse, and JJ's jaw slackens, clearly surprised at your outburst.

"I lost my friend too, okay?" she counters and you scoff.

"Did you?" you argue. "All those nights I called you crying, all those texts, those check ins... how long did you know Emily was still alive?" you demand, and JJ's feeling cornered, and her heart rate is picking up. She knew there'd be mixed feelings about this, but she'd never expected to ever be at odds with you. You, Spencer, and JJ rounded out the younger crowd on the team, it was your job to stick together. "Answer me." you insist, and you sound so crushed as you speak.

"I knew the whole time." she answers, and you nod your head, because of course you already knew.

"Exactly." you sneer. "You're a liar." you hate how angry this whole thing makes you, but you can't deny it. They'd played with your feelings, all of them, and now you were meant to behave like nothing was wrong. "Did you know about Hotch?" you ask, and JJ flinches. She doesn't answer for a while, and the water seems to rush even louder in your ears.

"I told him it wasn't smart." she finally answers. "But we needed to ensure that Emily wasn't at risk, it was harmless... just some flirting to keep you from getting too close to the truth." and JJ is speaking as if this wasn't some major breach of your position as coworkers and alleged friends. "He'd never cross the line." she reminds you, and the reminder that yeah, Hotch would never be with you makes you wince.

"And he didn't." she says this like she knows for certain. "It was flirting, Y/N. it didn't mean anything, we just needed you to..." and she trails off when she sees how destroyed you look at her admission. "Y/N..." she trails off, and you inhale sharply.

"Don't." you exhale, and you snatch your hand from her grasp. The cool air of the bathroom immediately attacks the welts blooming on your hand. You don't have time to pay them any mind.

"We just wanted to protect you... and keep Emily safe in the process. The more of us that knew Emily was alive, the more of a liability we'd be while Doyle was still on the run." she says, and you suppose in the grand scheme you understand. As profilers, as special agents working for the FBI they'd done great work. As your friends, as people you'd considered family for years... they'd betrayed you.

Plain and simple.

"Congratulations, you did exactly what you meant to." you say dully, and you sniffle, though no tears are set to come. Instead you feel more anger blossoming in the pit of your gut. "I hope it was worth it." and it's dramatic, but you deserve the dramatics, sidestepping the blonde and leaving her behind just as Emily is stepping inside. She looks at you wide-eyed, before she sees JJ standing there seemingly frazzled.

"Is everything okay?" she questions, and you don't offer her an answer, instead leaving the restroom as your earlier words ring in your head. I don't talk to ghosts. And you don't, and despite your history you'd never allow yourself to. You find your way back to the seats that led to the courtroom, Derek was gone, the only person still there was Spencer. He stands up as soon as he hears your shoes.

"Where's Derek?" you ask quietly.

"He left with Garcia." he answers quietly. "I guess they're dismissed for now. They're in with Dave now." he explains, and your eyes shift to the door. More than likely you or Spencer would be next.

You sit down, and Spencer follows you, sinking back into his seat as his legs just barely brush against yours. "Are you scared?" you ask, and Spencer's head shakes.

"Are you?" he shoots back, and you look away from the door.

"Not of this." you admit. "But of what comes after." you add and Spencer's pretty brown eyes are swimming with confusion. "Can we really all bounce back from something like this?" you ask, and it's rhetorical, but he answers you all the same.

"We've come back from worse." he reminds you, and that faint smile is worming back onto your face.

"Sure we have." you agree numbly. Spencer's eyes drop to your hand.

"How does it feel?" he asks, and you follow his gaze with a shrug of your shoulders. He doesn't look pleased by this approach, and it makes you sigh.

"Just feels like I ran some water over it." you admit, and Spencer chuckles. "A bit anticlimactic if I'm honest with you, Doctor." and you're partly teasing, mostly because it's so easy.

"You'll need some sort of petroleum jelly... there's some pretty good products that aren't at all carcinogenic like the leading brands." he begins on a tangent, and it makes you smile a bit bigger. "That with some gauze is the perfect remedy for such a mild burn." he proceeds and you look down at it. There's a moment of silence between you, before he's talking again. "Can I ask what happened?" he whispers.

You hum, almost like you're pretending you can't hear him.

"With the coffee? Was it not good? I tried to follow your order exactly." he says and you squeeze your eyes closed.

"It wasn't you or the coffee, Spence." you promise him, and without thinking you reach out, small hand resting on his shoulder. "The coffee was perfect." you insist, and he relaxes, but not enough. "I guess I'm just thrown about all of this." you proceed. "No matter how much I try to remind myself that they did this to protect Emily... that their deception was for a good reason, it just makes me angrier. Why is it that I have to rationalize being angry?" you question.

"I have to reign my feelings in for the sake of the team." you're careful not to grow loud. Spencer's eyebrows are pressed inwardly, head shaking.

"You don't." he denies you quickly. "You shouldn't." he corrects.

"You're right." you agree, and your silent for only a second. "I wish everyone could be like you, Spence." you say, and your words surprise him. He feels this familiar wave of adoration that always seems to swallow him whole whenever he was around you.

"Really?" he knows it might be pathetic, to be hopeful for something like this. The chance to hear what popped in your head whenever you thought of him.

"Yeah." you say firmly, and he tries not to look too eager. "You're so smart." you tell him, and he knows this, but it still feels nice hearing it from you. "And you're always nice to me." you add with a quiet laugh. "And you'd never lie to me would you?" you ask, and in truth, it's not a fair question. Spencer wasn't in the position the others were in.

"What do you mean?" he asks, and he fears it may be the wrong response. You don't even react, at least not that he can tell.

"Nothing." you settle on, head shaking from side to side. "Forget I mentioned it." and he doesn't really want to remind you that his memory quite literally makes that impossible. "I heard that you weren't fighting the suspension." you say conversationally, and he's surprised, mostly because the only person he'd told about that was Derek. Which meant you had been talking about him when he wasn't around.

"I guess I just stand by everything we did." he tells you, and your hand still hurts a bit, but it's definitely a problem for a later version of you.

"Me too. I'm glad we got Doyle, and Declan's safe." you exhale, and despite your anguish towards the team, you meant every word.

"And the team's back together." Spencer himself doesn't sound so convinced. You look over at him at this, your own unconvinced expression slowly cracking through his attempt at a cool facade.

"Is it?" you ask, and Spencer's face softens, a small little frown taking over his otherwise usually content face. He couldn't admit it now, mostly because it didn't feel like the right time, but he paid attention to you. He knew all about your complicated feelings for Hotch "I don't want to be on a team with people who purposely keep me in the dark about things." you ask, and Spencer pauses.

"I'm sure they wouldn't if they had another choice." he offers, and it's not how he feels at all, but it's what you need to hear.

"You don't believe that." you deny, and Spencer can't fight his chuckle. "Or maybe you do, you've always been good at seeing the best in people."

"Oh, do you think so?" it's a bit of a surprise. With your job description it would've made more sense for you to tell him that he saw the worst in people. He felt it was a fair thing to say that he was exceptionally good at his job, but it's then he recognizes what it is you're truly saying, or at least alluding to. It makes his face heat up immediately, cheeks blossoming a rosy red that makes him want to roll his eyes.

"Of course." you promise, and then you're looking at him again. Your face is one of the prettiest he's ever seen, and it's not even subtle. You seem a bit uncertain of your own allure though, which to him is a major shock. "You're like the best person ever." you add, and he expects you to snicker or show some sign that you were joking, but you don't. Bad for him, because his deluded mind full of fantasies starring you would take words like those the wrong way.

"I think you're the best person ever..." he's whispered this, but you hear it all the same, and he's lucky enough to witness the way your entire face morphs. Despite the bleariness in your eyes, you beam brightly. He hates though, that you start to cry. It starts with one tear slipping down your cheek and dripping into your lap. The onslaught comes right after, and before you know it, you're choking on sobs.

"God..." he hears the bitter tang of self-loathing that attaches and weaves itself into your otherwise honey-filled tone. "You're making this so hard, Spencer." you huff, and you scrub at your face harshly. He doesn't understand, but he's too frozen in place to ask you what you mean. Lucky him, you seem to know that you've got explain a bit, so you do. "I'm gonna resign." you say this quietly, sniffling as more tears fall. Spencer feels like he's misheard you.

He wants to have misheard you. He flounders a bit, and he's mentally scolding himself, because he has to hurry the fuck up and say something. "You can't!" and he's scolding himself again for sounding too eager. You jump a bit at the outburst, and he winces right along with you. "We just got everyone back." he reminds you, and you exhale, head nodding in understanding.

"I know." you promise him. "Why do you think this is so hard. You think I want to be the asshole that turns the unit on its head?" you ask. "But I can't stay here and pretend that everything's fine... or act like I don't feel thrown about all of this." you proceed, and of course, Spencer understands, he's upset he was lied too as well.

"I understand." he admits with a sigh, and you let out a quiet noise of relief, almost like you were worried he'd be upset with you. He assumes this is just him being delusional again. You look like you have something sitting on the tip of your tongue, so he stays silent to give you the room to say all that you need to.

"Have you ever had feelings for someone?" you ask. You chuckle at the look he shoots you, "Not just for a second, Spence." you proceed. "I mean like... take your breath away, kind of almost-in-love feelings." you indulge, and Spencer's keen to shut his mouth. Yes, is the loud and resounding answer that rings in his head, because foolishly he'd allows you to captivate him like the siren you were almost three years prior. He'd be a dummy to tell you such now though.

"I-" he blinks harshly, eyes feeling too dry. "I can't say I have." he lies, and he remembers your words from earlier, how you'd praised him for being someone who would never lie to you. You don't seem to notice his deception though, and if you do, you're too in your own head to comment on it.

"Good." you say with a shuddered breath. "They're nothing but a headache, especially when the person doesn't want you back." you exhale the words, and it's like a dagger is being lunged into his chest. How dense could you possibly be with all your super smarts?

"Did something happen with Hotch?" he asks, and now it's your turn to be embarrassed, face pinching up as you choke on a breath. "I don't mean to pry, if it's personal... it's just that-" he trails off, seemingly waiting for you to berate him or tell him to back off. You don't, instead your nose twitches, and you begin to look at your shoes. "Y/N?" he nudges you with his elbow, and it's light.

"No." you finally say, head shaking. "I thought maybe..." you trail off, more embarrassment slicing at you as you cringe. "But it was all a ruse, just a way to keep me from getting too close, and figuring out everything about Emily before they wanted us to know." you say and Spencer's eyebrows furrow.

"They?" he pries, and you look at him like he's silly.

"Hotch and JJ." you answer plainly, and it takes Spencer a second. JJ who he'd went to for comfort for ten weeks? He blinks at you, and you shrug. "So you see... anyone that could take my feelings and use them to manipulate me... are they really worth sticking around for?" you ask, and Spencer doesn't want to validate you in this way. He wants to be selfish, he wants you to stay on the team.

He thinks about how devasted everyone would be. How devasted he would be to walk into the bullpen and find that your desk was empty.

"I don't want you to go..." he admits, and it's quite pitiful, the sadness that soaks the words like gasoline. You find yourself chomping on your lip again, nails pressing into the cuts of your palms, and Spencer's catching your bad habits in real time.

It's a bit invasive, the way his hand surges out, and stops you in your tracks. "Please don't do this." and you're not sure if he's talking about leaving the unit, or if he's referring to the gashes littering your hands. When he holds your palm out flat, and rubs his thumb across the bleeding indentations, you find that you understand quickly.

Every few seconds it's ebbing with more droplets of blood, and he's quick to wipe them away like they offend him. Just as he's moving to say something else, the doors to the courtroom are opening, and Dave Rossi is exiting, his eyes immediately on you and Spencer. You must look foolish, hands intertwined as you stare wide-eyed at the team's senior agent. It's probably why Spencer is dropping your hand as you're snatching it away from his grasp.

You still find that your eyes are quick to appraise one another. He's looking at you, and you're staring back, mouths parted as if you'd been caught. Had you been caught? Had there really been anything to catch? You don't have time to answer, because you're being called next. You frown at Spencer, standing to your feet as he feels his pulse threaten to leap to disrespectful speeds.

"Y/N..." he calls after you, and you stop for a second. Eager eyes fall back on him, and he's trailing off, because the look in your eyes says it all. If you got out of this without being fired, you could imagine a world where quitting the FBI no longer made you sick to your stomach. Silence befalls the space, and he shakes his head after a beat. You look disappointed but not surprised, inhaling deep and audibly as you march towards the court room.

Spencer doesn't know what you're going to say, but he hopes recalling all you'd been through in the last few weeks will be enough to make you stay. At least until he has the courage to ensure that you leaving the team doesn't equate to losing you entirely and completely.

#criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds angst #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch imagine #aaron hotchner imagine #ssa aaron hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer x reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid imagine #dr spencer reid #s7x01 #emily prentiss death #unrequited love #unrequited feelings #unrequited crush #criminal minds fandom #doctor spencer reid #spencer reid drabble #spencer reid x oc #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x fanfiction

[pastanest]

Spencer Reid x she/her!reader

A/N: why is it so difficult to find high quality post-prison reid fbi vest gifs like I thought we were all sluts out here but Ig not

gif creds: @imagining-in-the-margins

Duality Of Man

Spencer Reid had never really considered himself to be a reckless man. He had always been a calculated, well thought out, methodical follower of the rules, for fear of being ridiculed further for breaking societal rules beyond the ones he couldn’t help via his neurodivergence. He enjoyed rules. Learning the rules of people, of their behavior, and of various board games that challenged his intellect, were some of his favorite pastimes, actually.

Spencer also would not have regarded himself as a particularly possessive or territorial person, prior to spending three months behind bars. They isolated him, kept him locked in a space with people that wanted him dead, like an animal raised in captivity being thrown into a cage of wild lions. Having nothing of his own changed the way in which Spencer viewed the world around him, once he was allowed to step back into it.

Yours had been the first face he had seen when he had set foot beyond the prison walls on the day of his release, and the moment he felt you return to his embrace, in a gesture the two of you had engaged in countless times, a form of physical contact that he was most comfortable sharing with you; Spencer felt that something was different. In a way that he didn’t quite understand, you were his, beyond the platonic confines he had previously forced over his own feelings for you. He was not overbearing and had never overstepped your boundaries, but he was more outwardly protective of you than anyone else.

It had only presented itself in small gestures and words: moving to stand slightly in front of you in any kind of tense situation to act as your human shield, checking in with you at every stage of the cases you worked together, prioritizing your safety over his, and, naturally being the first one to object when you volunteered to go undercover to seduce an unsub into revealing information.

“Absolutely not.” Spencer had uttered from where he sat beside you at the round table, shaking his head.

And you had rolled your eyes at him. “I’ll be fine, Spence, I can handle myself.”

He couldn’t argue with that, he had seen you stare down men twice your size on several occasions, which always made him smirk. Still, Spencer could not hide the sick feeling that twisted in his gut at the thought of you going undercover, and being in danger.

As he had often found, the feeling in Spencer’s gut had been right. The unsub had been clever enough to deduce that you were a deliberate victim, not one of happenstance, and as such, he took you to a second location, which he had not done with his previous victims.

Given it was not his usual mode of operation and he had acted on instinct, the unsub’s play was an amateur move; comparable to what Spencer was certain Gideon thought in their first chess games together, so many years prior. As clever as the ubsub had been in figuring out you were not who you said you were, he was not intelligent enough to outsmart the one man army of Doctor Spencer Reid when fuelled by a fire that he had never felt burning in him before. It took less than a day for the team of profilers to find the warehouse you were being kept in, and less than a minute for Spencer to completely disregard their carefully orchestrated plan to rescue an FBI agent with the regulated SWAT team.

He didn’t need a team behind him for this.

He would handle this bastard himself.

With a kick that Spencer was sure Derek Morgan would be proud of, the door to the warehouse was made obsolete. Gun and torch raised, Spencer stalked the dark warehouse, checking dusty room after dusty room, eagle eyes scanning every corner, until a figure dared step out of the shadows in front of him. Anyone foolish enough to make themselves a physical blockade that kept Spencer from getting to you was a waste of oxygen.

“So, you’re the one she’s convinced is coming to save her.” The unsub taunted, chuckling darkly as he raised his arms out to his side cockily. “C’mon then, show me what you’ve got. No weapons, just you and me, man to man.”

As if to prove the authenticity of his own words, he discarded his usual weapon of choice, the blade clattering against the warehouse floor.

Spencer eyed him like a wild lion in a cage, and he almost smirked at the irony, but kept his expression calm and collected. He glanced at the doorway of the dark room they stood in, knowing that protocols would advise him to call for assistance, to make the arrest with as little physical harm as possible. But when Spencer’s eyes gravitated back to the subject who was now very much known to him, his target was in his sights.

An icy glare stayed fixed on the man that took you as the sound of a torch and gun hitting the ground echoed through the otherwise empty room. The air was thick as Spencer unclipped his FBI bulletproof vest and tossed that to the ground, too. And with no sense of urgency, he popped the cufflinks of his shirt and rolled his long sleeves up to his elbows.

An invitation to beat the life out of someone that took you? Hurt you? It must be Christmas.

Spencer’s expression was unmoving, and he didn’t say a word. Finally, after a childhood spent as a victim of merciless bullying and a portion of his adulthood fearing the judgment and cruelty of others, Spencer Reid was confident in his ability to end a physical confrontation with his own two fists.

In three large strides, he was face to face with the egotist, who swung at him, pathetically, and predictably enough for Spencer to not only swerve out of the way, but reciprocate the gesture tenfold. A solid right hook spun the idiot’s jaw and sent him stumbling, but Spencer was far from finished. He stalked over to him and in a matter of steps, had grabbed his target by his shirt collar and forced him against the wall. The fool was still reeling from Spencer’s punch, a dazed look in his eyes and blood dripping from his split lip.

“Did you touch her?”

Spencer’s words were eerily quiet, barely above a whisper, but in the silence of the warehouse they reverberated against every wall. He had a feeling that he already knew the answer, but he needed to hear it, he had to be sure his next actions would be justified.

His vision clearing, the man fool enough to take you smirked up at Spencer.

“(Y/N) looks real pretty when she cries, doesn’t she?”

He chose to answer Spencer’s question with a rhetorical question that immediately decided his fate.

In a fraction of a second, Spencer threw his target to the ground and pounced on him, vision clouded with red as he landed punch after punch, until the ground looked just as red to everybody else. If three months in prison had taught Spencer Reid anything, it wasn’t just how to fight, it was how to fight dirty.

He only stopped when the physical barrier sputtered for breath, and that was only because Spencer didn’t want to get thrown back into a cell. Catching his breath, Spencer lifted his gaze and scanned the room around him again.

“Spencer?!”

And he was stood, his rage an afterthought as he followed the weak sound of your voice, your call to him. In a sea of voices, Spencer could pinpoint yours in an instant. Having heard commotion, you had assumed it was him, coming to your rescue, like you always knew he would.

He found you in the next room, bruised and bloody, tied to a chair and covered in torn clothes with cuts beneath them that reassured Spencer the blood dripping from his knuckles was beyond worth it.

The look in his eyes was so soft as he ran to you and crouched in front of you, kissing your forehead as he tore the ropes from you with no regard for the burns he may get on his already bloody hands.

Finally free, you collapsed into Spencer’s arms, and he released the breath he’d been holding since you’d been taken, closing his eyes as he held you tightly against him, standing up and helping you to your feet in turn. The weight of the trauma you carried made your legs shake beneath you, but Spencer was there to hold you steady, he would always be there. He held your face in his hands and gave you the softest smile you’d ever seen, his thumbs ever so gently caressing your cheeks.

It took you a second to come to terms with your surroundings and your rescue, but as soon as you had, your eyes widened and you took Spencer’s hands in yours.

“You’re hurt.” You murmured, tears shining in your eyes as you held his bloody knuckles with such tenderness, he was surprised he could feel it after the aggression his hands had just been subjected to, but he would always be able to feel you.

Spencer almost chuckled in disbelief as you - in your beaten, bloody and traumatized state - became upset over a little blood on his hands. Well, maybe it was more than a little…

“Adrenaline, (Y/N), I can’t feel a thing.” Spencer reassured you in a soft voice, holding your face in his hands again and placing the lightest kiss on your nose. “But we need to get you to a doctor.”

The moment he said it, the rest of the team filtered into the room, having passed the sputtering suspect and Spencer’s discarded bulletproof vest on their way.

The look on Emily’s face told Spencer he would have several unpleasant reports to fill out regarding how he’d handled this case, but when he stared into your eyes and saw the stars in them, he knew he’d do it all again a hundred times if you were waiting on the other side for him.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid imagine #x reader #imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #imagines #fanfic #fanfiction #headcannon #headcannons

[mxssingmemories]

I Think I’m Finally Clean

Pairings: Aaron Hotch x daughterfigure!reader, Derek Morgan x daughterfigure!reader, Spencer Reid x daughterfigure!reader, Penelope Garcia x daughterfigure!reader

Warnings: GRAPHIC description of self-harm, lots of crying, reader gets better I swear

Summary: You work at the BAU and you've been having a rough time. You fall into old habits, but the team is there for you. This follows the road to recovery! Set in season 1.

A/N: this got a little too real, too fast, so i apologize if the writing is a little sloppy. this hit home for me. please take care of yourself-if you feel like this will trigger you, please don't read it. my dms are always open.

Also, I promise I'm working on the requests-this was just 3/4 finished :)

Word Count: 2.4k!

You'd been having a shit day. Everyone in the office knew this and were on the lookout, but Hotch was more concerned than he normally would've been. He was trained to not show too much emotion on the outside, but he'd taken you under his wing for a reason. He tended to watch your behavior more often than he did the others. This, in turn, meant that he almost always knew when something was up with you.

This day was particularly bad, he observed. You'd been down all day, your usually smiling face either looking down or with a frown on it. You didn't seem happy at all, which was strange for everyone on the team—Hotch, especially. He knew you had mental health issues in the past, but there was always a way for him to cheer you up. Today, however, nothing worked. He'd given you a few hugs, which he knew you loved; Derek had been extra caring with you today; hell, Garcia had even brought you cupcakes! No matter how hard the team tried, they couldn't wipe the frown off your face. They spent all day worrying about you, and it didn't help when you disappeared to the bathroom for thirty minutes. After ten, everyone was anxious—Hotch was practically pacing, Spencer and Derek were sending worried looks towards the door you exited out of.

Of course, the team knew as much of your history as Hotch did- it was one of the first things they'd found out about in your file. Honestly, after being on the team for four years (and, of course, being the baby), they knew you better than you knew yourself. Spencer, Derek, Garcia, and mostly Hotch did their best to take on a family role for you. It was evident in the way they acted around you that they cared, and you wouldn't change a thing about it. Their gentle touches, reassurances, and comfort—it was all more than you thought you'd have when you got kicked out and started training for this.

As the time passed, they got more and more worried. Everyone was tense. The case that they'd been previously "working on" lay untouched on the table, multiple pairs of eyes staring at the door to the restroom. They were waiting, watching, and hoping for you to come back into the break room before they had to intervene. Hotch had a theory in the back of his mind about what had happened, but he kept pushing it back. It wasn't possible, right? It had been two years since you'd-Nope. No. He cut himself off right there. Worrying too much was only going to make the situation worse.

The atmosphere in the room got more and more tense, the silence stretching on for what felt like hours. There was a silent debate going on about how long they could wait until they burst into the bathroom. A minute later, Hotch stood up abruptly, walking briskly to the restroom door. Derek and Penelope tried to get up to follow, but Spencer stopped them with a shake of his head.

"Hey, Y/N, you okay in here?" Hotch knocked, pushing on the door lightly when he heard a small whimper instead of an answer.

"I'm coming in, kiddo," he quietly said, pushing open the door. He shut it behind him, taking a deep breath before turning around to face you.

To put it shortly, there was blood everywhere around your arms—obviously, self-made cuts were fresh and bleeding moderately heavily.

"Fuck, sweetheart, what happened?" Hotch whispered."I-I don't know. I couldn't help it, it won't happen again, I swear-" You tried to reassure, breaking down into tears before you could finish the sentence. Hotch immediately gathered you into his arms, his parental nature showing through.

"Shh, it's okay, honey; you're going to be okay," he reassured, rocking you back and forth. He put your fingers on his wrist, allowing you to feel his pulse point. Strangely, it helped you calm down.

When you started to breathe a little easier, he pulled back. Pressing his forehead against yours, he brushed some of the tears off of your face, using his sleeve to wipe some snot under your nose. You both stayed like that until you stopped crying, the situation at hand temporarily forgotten as he held you.

"Okay, Y/N/N," he said softly, pulling back a little bit. "I'm going to get the first aid kit. It's right under here, sweetheart." You nodded at his statement, signaling that it was okay for him to detach himself from you.

He grabbed the first aid box out from under the cabinet, pulling out the alcohol wipes, bandages, and gauze.

"This is going to hurt," he warned you, unwrapping the gauze and sterilizing the wounds on your arm. You winced slightly, even though he was being as gentle as he possibly could. He tossed the wipe in the garbage can, pulling out the gauze and bandages next.

"You know we're going to have to do something about this, right?" His question made you tear up again.

"Can we do it tomorrow?" you asked, burying your face in his shoulder. You felt him nod and continue to apply the bandages. He finished rather quickly, and it was time to face your teammates once again. You were very hesitant—you had no idea how they'd react.

"Can we stay here for a minute?" you asked quietly, your voice dropping its volume. Hotch nodded, and he let you climb into his arms once again. He did his best to be careful of your wounds. They were bandaged, sure, but he hated the thought of you in pain at all. He hated the thought of him being the one to cause it even more.

As you moved to walk out the door, he stopped you. He was holding his jacket out to you.

"Just in case," he smiled, opening the door. His hand wrapped around your shoulders in a comforting manner, and his face shot down any questions about what had happened. He led you to the couch on the other side of the room and laid you down as quietly as he could.

"If you need me, call me, okay? I'll be right over there, with Spence and Morgan." He reassured you, planting a quick kiss on your temple. You silently let your eyes close, the stress of the past hour catching up with you.

You awoke thirty minutes later to the sound of chatter in the other corner of the room, a small smile making its way onto your face when you realized Derek was fake flirting with Penelope again. You forced yourself to get up and walk over to your desk. Everyone's eyes immediately turned to you.

"Y'alright, kiddo?" Derek asked, making eye contact with you. You nodded at him, not trusting yourself to speak right then. Your head dipped down as you focused on the paper in front of you—yet another unsub you were trying to track down. He was a bit confused by your lack of response, but with a look from Hotch, he decided to let it go. That didn't stop all eyes from being on you as you worked on your paperwork, though. When it became clear you weren't going to say anything, they all did their best to turn their attention away from you.

Eventually, your sleeve rode up. It exposed the wide bandage on your arm, along with a few cuts that were peeking out. You hadn't noticed yet. Derek, however, definitely did. His eyes widened immediately, almost choking on the coffee he was drinking. The chair squeaked loudly on the floor as he stood up abruptly. Concern covered his face, eyebrows tight, and body tense. He gently grabbed your shoulder and led you into Hotch's office, despite the loud concerns from everyone. The minute the door closed, he pulled you into a tight hug. Realization crossed your face, and you started sobbing into his shoulder for the second time that day. He only held you tighter, his head resting on top of yours. The room was silent except for the occasional loud sob from you.

"Please tell me if you ever feel like doing that again. Please, kid. I can't let you go through that again," he pleaded, breaking the silence. You nodded and fell back onto his shoulder.

He eventually picked you up and brought you over to the couch, letting you lay down on top of him. You wrapped your body around him, desperate for the comfort this gave you.

Derek stayed with you like that until the door opened softly, Spencer and Hotch walking in.

"Hey, sweetheart," Spencer said softly, walking over to the couch quietly. "Pen's on the way with a soft blanket, m'kay?" He sat down beside you two, Hotch following suit. The second they got settled, Penelope walked in with the promised blanket in hand. She laid the blue fleece blanket on top of all of you, then sat down herself. It took a minute for you to adjust—four bodies on a couch meant for three was a lot—but you eventually got settled.

You ended up with your feet in Penelope's lap, your head in Spencer's, and Derek and Hotch holding the rest of you. Derek was rubbing your back, and Spencer was playing with your hair. All of the negative thoughts from the day went away as you were surrounded by the love of the people you cared about most. You knew you were going to be okay, though—you had your people with you.

----------------------------------------

You walked into the room all smiles, happier than you've been in months. Everyone noticed, and boy did they love it.

"What's got ya smilin', sugar?" Derek teased, hopping out of his desk chair to give you a quick hug.

"Can we get everyone in here, please?" You asked him, smiling even wider. He nodded quickly, gathering Hotch, Penelope, and Spencer. They all stood facing you, and you were practically shaking with excitement.

"I'm one year clean!" You shouted, and the minute you said that, they all gathered around you in a group hug.

"Shit yeah! I knew you could do it, angel!" Derek laughed, pulling you into his arms and lifting you up, spinning you around. Spencer and Hotch did the same, laughter ringing around the bullpen loudly.

"Can we have a party? Can we PLEASE have a party?" Penelope yelled, grinning from ear to ear.

"It's not worth a party, though," you tried to argue, but Spencer immediately put a finger to your lips as Hotch spoke.

"Garcia, if you can get everything..you need?" He trailed off, not sure how to phrase it. "In thirty minutes, we can do a party." His words were accompanied by a resounding cheer from everyone, which brought back the grin on your face.

"Alright, alright," you said, feigning annoyance. The smile on your face betrayed you, though.

Penelope walked in the door thirty minutes later. White bags were hidden behind her back as she walked discreetly to the break room. You were held captive in Hotch's office by Reid and the other men were sent outside to "assist in the festivities." You sat there talking to Spencer for about ten minutes before the men-boys, apparently, burst into the room and dragged you to the break room.

The table was decked out in a purple party cloth, with four plates in spots for everyone. The lighting was dim, and blinds over windows were pulled shut. Cupcakes were being sat out on the table for everyone to choose from, and your favorite soda was sitting by each person's plate.

"Pen, this is too much," you smiled, grateful tears in your eyes. She whined and pulled you into her side.

"No tears on your big day!"

She led you to your chair of choice, and Hotch pulled out the chair for you, planting a kiss on your forehead as he did so. Penelope placed cupcakes on everyone's plates, putting a bright blue candle on yours.

"So I know I have a few things I wanna say; does anyone else?" She asked, and when everyone's hands shot up, she positively beamed.

"Hotch, you can go second, then Derek, then Reid," she decided, pointing her fingers at everyone.

"I just want to let you know how happy I am for you. I know what your brain is thinking right now—you don't think you deserve any of this. Well, news flash—you do. You deserve everything right here and more, and I am so, so elated that I got to help and see you get better. I love you, kiddo!" She smiled, effectively ending her speech by sitting down and taking a drink of her soda.

"My turn," Hotch began. "It has been such a pleasure to know you, Y/N. It was terrifying to walk in on what I did that day, but to see you come so far..? It's something I've been hoping to see for so long. I am so proud of you, and things will get better from here," he said, sitting down with tears in his eyes.

"Hey, sweetheart," Derek smiled, making eye contact with you. " You know that this is absolutely amazing, right? You're such an inspiration to everyone on the team, and you impress me every day. The fact you made it this far says a lot about you and your character, and it reminds me every day how lucky I am to know you. I never stop thinking about you—you're like my kid, y'know? I am so proud of you. What I said that day still goes no matter what happens." he said, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as Reid stood up.

"Y/N. I've known since the day I met you that things would be tough. You know what you've shown me, though? No matter how hard things get, a person can always push through. You are such an awesome person, and you've taught me so much—which is more than I can say for most of the people in this room," he joked, causing you to laugh through your tears.

"We love you, kid." Hotch reassured you, everyone finding a way to hug you in the semi-crowded room. The pressure grounded you, and you pulled away a minute later.

Penelope lit the candle, and cheers were heard from the whole BAU as you blew it out. You were more content than you'd ever been in your whole life that day. Being surrounded by all the love and support made that day one of your happiest memories, and you wouldn't trade your crazy family for the world.

#my writing #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #spencer reid x platonic reader #derek morgan x platonic! reader #aaron hotchner x platonic! reader #penelope garcia x platonic!reader