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papers4me · 3 years

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Fruits Basket, Se3, ep 12 (Part 1)

The aftermath of the curse lifting~ Btw, the timeline is super messy. Flashbacks & background stories aren’t this anime’s best tool, it’s always felt messy when they attempt that. more on it in my side notes below. Now into the ep~

-Yuki & Machi: ( Blossoming Love!):

I love that the author attempted different direction of romantic love with yuki/machi that suits yuki’s personality! Opposite to kyo/tohru who had the (from best friends to lovers/ from roommates of 3 years to lovers). Yuki & machi’s love is based on natural crush & while she isnt his best friend, she’ll be his lover & they’ll know each other after dating. Both types of love are realistic & have their own path of dynamics, which is clear with how yuki/machi will be interacting & how kyo/tohru are now interacting since becoming official. I’m still bummed most of yuki/machi’s “noticing each other” is supposed to be off-screen, it robbed me of seeing yuki interact in a normal teenage-boy crushing on a girl which contrasts his relationship with kakeru, kyo, haru & tohru. Now, we’ll start the “ official-boyfriend yuki” stage! Also, this jump to confessions didnt help machi have any uniqueness beside being saved by yuki’s words from her trauma. watching her interact with him normally would’ve added realistic depth to her being a normal girl with unique cute quirks differently from tohru, Isuzu, kagura or even motoko!. Oh well~ moving on & focusing on the meaningful cute confession. I loved that altho there were a hug & a kiss, it didn’t have “ I love you” statement. You know they (will) love each other so dearly, but they’re in stage 1 now, she just called him by his first name for the first time! cute! I love that the emphasis is on the “ first name” calling since this is a huge key to yuki’s identity & struggle. Also, It is cute she bought a gift to tohru! This is a set-up to a healthy relationship with yuki since she isn’t jealous from a precious woman in his life that isnt related by blood.

-Moving towards the future: Kyoru’s final stage of growth!

By Kyokoy’s grave Kyo & tohru had key moment of growth & healthy closure to their core character issues::

1- Kyo’s toxic habit of running from life became a desire to run towards life!: While this habit is rightfully excused by his trauma, it needed to be addressed once his curse broke. We know he stopped running & faced his dad, confessed to tohru, accepted her love, embraced his crazy desire for her & accepted he deserved to be loved! Even ran towards tohru, chasing her! However, all the above is him running to the good current life in his grasp. He needs to run to the far away future this time! Needs to plan for the good & accept that the bad is part of it. struggling is part of life & he’ll endure it together with her, while enjoying life’s rewards.

I love that kyo is the one who suggested moving out to another city/place, cuz kyo was the one NOT living. He was long dead & trapped in the cage of his guilt & self-loath. Tohru at least was living thro helping others ( which is not real living but at least it’s better). Kyo was “ Mom, why didn’t you kill me instead of yourself?” ,“ I’ll kill yuki & then kill myself, would that please you, dad?!”, “ I cant forgive me, I dont want you to forgive me, tohru”. Walking on a road of self-destruction & slow death. But now, with tohru he wants life!!! all of it!! travel, learn, see, struggle, fail, succeed, build their own future by themselves.

I love that kyo didnt take tohru’s approval for his plans for granted. He really didnt think she’ll accept right away. He didnt even want her to dedice quickly, He was prepared for compromising to a better solution for them both. They’ll work other possibilities “ if i’m gonna live in this world, I want to do it with you”.

I love that kyo was real abt the obstacles ahead & didnt want tohru to just follow him based on love. He wanted her to decide on her own as well. He also, left the door open for her to change her mind anytime & this screams support & understanding!! Very powerful!.

2- Thoru’s toxic habit of being ashamed to desire anything for herself, living for others & wearing a happy “i’m okay” mask while concealing her true feelings became confidence, self-clarity & honesty: The tohru who was smiling while concealing grief on the beach is gone, the tohru who kyo had to coax her to “complain, be selfish” se01,ep5, to “not hide worrying over a relative’s sickness” se02, ep14 “ cry if she needs to” se3, ep6, is now telling kyo her honest opinion abt his proposal, while thinking of her own self as much as him & even objecting to his sentiment abt her mom’s words!!!!

I love that tohru is now a confident free woman making her own decisions based on self-honesty & communication with her partner. She wasn't just “okay” with it cuz he wants it while putting fake smile, No more of that. Now, she’ll say her true feelings, she asked him abt his plans, tried to see if it is a spur of the moment decision or if he really thought abt it. She also inquired where’s heading, who he talked to, what he’s planning! She is deciding for herself after hearing him! ok, this is your plan? I like it. I’m going! Very powerful!.

I love that like how kyo was realistic abt the plan having some difficulties due to starting away by themselves, she was also realistic that it is indeed sad to part with my friends, my hometown, & my mom’s resting-place, but i’ll choose ME now. “I” want to go with you for “me”. This is not a bind I’ll follow you wherever love story, this is realistic depiction of healthy relationship. Acknowledging hardships & accepting them saves you from being crushed by failure, you’ll endure it when it eventually happens & move on, cuz God knows we DO fail & succeed! Life isnt smooth sailing~

I love that tohru complemented him on his plan cuz she could see that is a sign of growth. If she’s gonna share her life with this man, it is delightful to see that he is thinking of a happier, healthier & realistic future! Cuz kyo was this destroyed man~ so destroyed he was pushing her away despite loving her dearly, now, he’s asking her opinion & permission to accompany him!

I love that tohru made sure to touch upon kyo’s last scar “ my mom doesnt hate you” This is a scar that wont go away even if kyo is mentally healthy. Cuz death is the ultimate truth. He can never hear kyoko’s affirming her love for him, he’ll have to trust in it based on their earlier interaction together. Tohru is powerfully & stubbornly taking away most of his pain by affirming her acknowledge of her mom. You might disagree kyo, you might still feel a bit guilty, it might haunt you sometimes. but me? NO. Never. Mom loved you. She meant ONLY good. Hopefully my determination heals you bit by bit, & it DOES. Kyo stands bravely, confidently & happily in front of kyoko’s grave & instead of saying “ i apologize for hurting you, or tohru, I’m sorry, forgive me”. he tells her he’ll keep their promise & protect tohru for life! he literally proposed there in front of her mom & all. T_T

-Kyoko’s Words: ( Sometimes, you don’t get to know the whole truth & that’s okay):

Can’t describe how much I love this part. This is the most painful yet important lesson in furuba. Life isn’t a movie where the entire truth is exposed to the characters or the audience. Sometimes you live & die without getting to know an important truth, hearing a much needed confirmation, or getting a loved one’s forgiveness. There are things in our life that we just can’t get back no matter how much we tried. What we do, then? die? despair? throw away what we DO have in our hands for this lost truth no matter how important it was to us? No, we do the only thing we can. Live. Not just go thro life’s motion, but really live. Accept the good & the bad. This is so goddamn easy & difficult as hell too!

-Kyo not knowing kyoko’s words at that time was tragic. It was so tragic it sent kyo into a suicidal descent into the abyss. The wounds of his mom’s death that were slowly healing with kazuma’s care got re-opened & poured blood! The old destructive habits became full force, The toxic coping habits returned with its ugliness. I can’t kill myself literally? I’ll do it figuratively. trapped, caged, destroyed, eyes shut, ears closed, only seeing his pain. Kyo is us. All of us in any moment of true crushing despair. He could never bring the dead back, hear their loving words or ask forgiveness. Thro kyo, the author is telling us... I know. You had your moment of lost truth, didn’t you? I know. IT IS OKAY. live, my child. your pain is valid, let it take its course, but afterwards live bravely.

-Kyo’s path towards healing is: the ugliest cuz it hurt tohru of all ppl, the longest cuz he was the last one to move on, the bloodiest cuz he’ll never have the ppl he lost, the rockiest cuz he failed & failed, the most frustrating cuz he repeated his mistakes over & over, He couldnt even do it alone. needed intervention & support. He lost hope. completely. But it is okay even if you fell as deep as kyo: stand up. even if you never learned the truth: let go. even if you were the last one to learn or heal: it isn’t a race. Embrace life with its good & bad & continue as kyoko said “ you fought well”

-Kyoko’s parting plea to her daughter broke my heart into pieces. Death is ugly, but death is a truth that we can’t escape. The leaving ones is hurting as much as the ones left behind, but hopefully, the leaving ones will find a happiness a kin to the ones left behind. yuki’s "say a prayer & move one, one step at a time” is all you can do.

-Kyoko was: a gangster who hurt others (ugly path), repented, married & had a daughter (fulfilling path), widowed & left her daughter while grieving (ugly path), came back, repented & tried to raise tohru well, love her enough! (fulfilling path), died & left her young high school daughter all alone (heartbreaking path) but she accepted that the last path isn’t sth she can fight, prayed, & accepted her fate~

-Kyoko~~ “ you fought well” while you were alive~ you really did! The Tohru you left behind helped a whole clan & hopefully readers as well! you tohru is loved by an entire generation of readers & anime watchers. Tohru is so precious & I can’t stop crying~

Side Notes:

Timeline is super messy & confusing. (a) Tohru’s hospital discharge, kyoru’s hug & curse break for everybody all happened at the (late) afternoon. While curse was breaking, akito was wearing her white kimono & she cried until tohru hugged her on sunset. (b) Before tohru’s hospital shigure’s face was scar-less. we first saw the scar in the afternoon & he was wearing his kimono.

Now the flashback, Akito wearing her outfit from her talk with the maid (which also happened while kyo was talking to his dad which is on the same day) & shigure wearing suit & it’s sunset time??????? How can the sunset happen before the curse break on the afternoon? She inflected the scars on the sunset, how did he have them on the afternoon of the same day?? both changed outfits which is even weirder??? Someone help me put things on order. Or is order not important? If the sequence of events isn’t important, then, why did it have to happen on the curse break day??? Shigure could’ve had his scars a day or two before tohru’s discharge.

Also the OP started in the middle of yuki’s scene which was so odd!

No big deal, but I still feel that yuki’s curse break would’ve been thematically powerful last ep. Especially after seeing The Zodiac Ruler come & collect the spirits. The legend would've been wrapped powerfully on the same ep where it was told. We see the zodiacs’ original story & we see its closure. It would’ve made tohru/akito’s hug more symbolic. An end of an era to akito & to them all. Real Goodbye to the zodiac animals, but now we had a goodbye & a half. lol.

Is yuki the only one seeing the cursed spirit? He looked down at it? I dont remember the others looking down where an animal would be? Is yuki’s curse special? different? He got all the ropes/bonds around him? I really thought yuki’s theme is all abt desiring to be normal & despising the “special” treatment that haunted him even in school.

Momiji/ kagura /kyo interaction is cute!

Haru/Yuki/ Isuzu interaction is cute as well. XD

Kagura, girl, you used to have best fashion, what’s up with jeans under knee length dress?! lol.

I’ll be honest. It is a lost opportunity that machi weren't made to question how teen-tohru is yuki’s mom. That would’ve solidified her as a unique stand alone character if she were to discuss it with yuki. Tohru being yuki’s mom figure is not normal, otherwise yuki’s entire dilemma of figuring out his feelings for tohru would’ve become meaningless. Having machi quickly “understand” it is a bit weird. But it helps the plot move quickly, I guess. ( it reminds me of Arisa hugging akito when she confessed stabbing kureno without questioning anything, it is weird, but you get the message that “ we aint got time for that~ gotta hop on the next plot).

I love that furuba subverted the old anime-trope of the entire happy cast staying together in one city/place & living exactly like they did in their teens except being married now! XD. It is so realistic that each character is now moving on their path of life~

Tohru wore a ring in her foreshadowing vision! SHE WORE A RING! My baby girl is a grown woman now~ T_T. I love tohru so much!~

Shigure/ akito & the last banquet is in my review part 2. I’ve been editing out any thoughts abt Shigure from my previous posts. I needed to see the whole picture first. I think can now talk abt them, I’m looking forward to the comments of the next part cuz I really really need to see if I understood it or if i’m off.

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #crying paper #proud paper!#tohru is just so precious!#final season #Part 1

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quirrrky · 3 years

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For the FOURTH DATE OF CHRISTMAS a daydream came to me...

A ZENNEZU ONSEN DATE for the the lovely @crisperia. Since your heart really pines for this ship, I will serve it right to you. Indulge in your dream holidate!

FEATURED DATE SONG: TOUCH MY BODY by SAM KIM

Zenitsu and Nezuko had been married for almost a month and yet they’re still acting like they’re teenagers whet it boiled down to intimacy. That’s why Uzui gave the newlyweds free accommodation at an onsen with a private bath just for the two of them. He told them that he already had other plans in mind during the season hence he’ll just give the opportunity to the two. In reality though, he just wanted the new couple’s relationship to move forward.

In their private onsen, Zenitsu and Nezuko were having the shyest time of their life seated at the bath stool. Nezuko volunteered to wash her husband’s back and he accepted despite being so internally anxious.

Nezuko wasn’t that audacious, but she thought that maybe it’s the right time that they get to be honest with each other.

She heard a lot of stories from the women in their village—stories about how newlyweds were usually inseparable and how they always had their hands on each other. Nezuko knew that her husband wanted the same for them too, but the both of them can be all too caught up with their emotions and imagination that they’d be so overwhelmed to act on it.

On the other hand, Zenitsu blonde already had this event played over in his head. No one could really count how many times he rehearsed this moment. Even though it’s like that, he’s still nervous like hell. He was just seated still, hands tightly clenched and eyes firmly closed attempting to gather enough confidence and self-control.

If he’d be honest, he’s surprised that Nezuko herself courageously offered to wash his back. Just the feel of his soft and dainty fingers on his calloused skin was enough to make his mind go blank and his body go crazy he’s really embarrassed about it. Not to mention, her partially naked form, which he’s been trying so hard to avoid looking at.

And internally, he was screaming.

It’s funny how he's so upfront about professing his love yet too shy to engage at things like most of the time. And with his own wife! For God’s sake!

It was as if the heavens were really testing him, when his wife’s hand accidentally slipped on his back having her front all pressed against him. He felt her naked figure against his skin and noticed her towel on the ground. His imagination ran wild breaking the last string of self-control he had.

Zenitsu spun around and finally faced Nezuko. "Let me take care of you too, Nezuko-chan."

He placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, then on her nose and finally a chaste peck on her soft lips.

Nezuko's hands went up his shoulder as he trailed down her neck. He nipped at the nook and she bit her lip. Trailing gentle kisses, he reached her breasts which he paid more time pampering. She involuntarily whispered his name and he unlatched from her.

Zenitsu reached out for her again and kissed her deeply. While she reveled in the passion of their wntwiened lips, his hand was now smoothing over her thigh. He slightly pulled away and asked looking straight into her eyes. "May I?"

Her head was spinning with thoughts. As an answer to his question, she let herself melt in his arms and be surrounded by nothing but him.

They could say that they weren't that used yet to this kind of affection. They always ended up being so shy to voice out what they've been yearning to do with each other as they're too embarrassed to get it get across, but this night was an exception.

Their night was spent exploring each other and, at last, bringing their walls down and getting more comfortable.

“Nezuko-chan~” Zenitsu called out to his wife and wrapped an arm around her from behind as they were dipped in the hot water of the spring.

“Hmm?” Nezuko hummed in return and snuggled closely to him.

He came near her ear and whispered playfully, “Let’s do something like this again at home…Can we? Please…”

A blush crept across her face remembering the things they just recently did.

“Okay,” she said quietly and shyly and they both giggled afterwards.

A/N: Owo!!!! @crisperia! I knew I had to make this zennezu ‘cuz you wished for it and since it’s Christmas, it’s just a lot better when people get what they want and with a little bit of surprise.

EVENT NAVIGATION: #12 DATES ✼ 4th DATE [12 DATES OF CHRISTMAS EVENT]

REBLOGS ARE DEEPLY APPRECIATED ♡ Please help me reach other viewers as tumblr tags are unfortunately not working on me. Thank you so so much!

☾ masterlist: Zennezu ✧ KNY ☾ ⁺˚*·✧ request guidelines ✧⁺˚*·

#waaah hot spring zennezu!#finally got to write a xmas for these two #zennezu fanfic #zennezu scenarios #zennezu #zenitsu x nezuko #nezuko x zenitsu #quirrrky zennezu

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jtsfavslut · 4 years

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Stages [5/6]

Description: In which a girl goes through six stages to realize and accept the fact that her marriage is going downhill.

Stage Three: Depression

- Stages 1

- Stages 2

- Stages 3

- Stages 4

Description: Yeimy finally has a conversation with Grayson, and comes to terms with herself that she had been putting off for a while. But what happens when she finally realizes everything is over?

Warnings: None

Word Count: 2.1k+

Work was something that was keeping you distracted from what was currently happening in your life.

You were able to clock in and out whenever you wanted, but being in the office made you forget all of your problems.

You knew avoiding your feelings and problems was wrong, but you weren’t ready to come on terms with yourself or reality at that.

The sound of your phone’s notification made you stop writing an article you were working on about fashion business etc.

Grayson Bailey :/

Meet me in my office at 6, please :(

You stared at it for a couple of minutes, debating whether or not you should go, or ignore him.

Me:

Kay.

That was your response. A dry ‘kay’. You knew it annoyed him when people responded to him with that. Something about him feeling ignored, but you didn’t care. Not anymore.

The sounds of ‘Summertime Sadness’ by Lana Del Rey, were blasting through your Jeeps speaker as you awfully sang along, meaning every word of it. (I was listening to this while writing this and all I can think about is the vine with the chicken wearing the red dress.)

“What is it, Dolan? Don’t waste my time,” you said walking inside his office his eyes scanning over your small Robbie wrap dress (this is the reference cuz I suck at describing) you were wearing along with your docs.

“Yeah, umm-” he said, clearing his throat and taking his eyes off your body. “I signed the papers,” he softly said, handing you the folder you had given him a few days ago.

“Thanks,” you awkwardly said as your hand accidentally touched his while grabbing the folder.

“Can we talk, Yeimy I-” he began saying before you cut him off.

“There’s nothing to talk about Bailey, you banged my friend that’s it,” you sighed, getting up from your chair as your patience started to die down.

“Yes, there is. There is Yeimy. There’s my side of the story,” he said making you roll your eyes.

“You have ten minutes Grayson, ten minutes,” you said looking at the overly priced Rolex he gifted you for your One Year Wedding Anniversary.

“Okay. Thanks,” he said and let out a sigh before he opened his mouth to speak again.

“I know nothing justifies what I did. At all” he said and you nodded your head taking a seat once again. “I don’t know why I did it. I don’t even remember how it started if I'm being honest. All I know is that it was really dumb of me, and that caused me to lose you, the only one that cared and loved me when no one else did,” he said and your eyes started to water as you tried your hardest to stop them from falling.

“And she doesn’t compare to you. She doesn’t in any way. You’re better than her in every single way. God, you hated when I bought you stuff, saying how you didn’t want or need my money while all she wanted was things. And I was dumb, so fucking dumb Marie,” he said calling you by your middle name causing a tear to stream down your face.

“Grayson-” you began saying before he cut you off.

“No, Yeimy let me finish. I know you don’t believe or trust me anymore but trust me that when I tell you that I love you is because I do. I love you with all my fucking life, and I never meant to hurt you. I never did. So I signed the papers. I signed the papers because that’s what you want and what you need.” he said and you looked up to him crying with red watery eyes and a frown.

“You were, and still are the reason why I’m here because you supported us-no me, you supported and stood by me when everything was going downhill, and you helped us bring the company back up. You stayed awake with me every night thinking of ways to attract business, thinking of new products, making ads, and articles, scheduling interviews and doing interviews just to help me and E,” he said. Remembering the many nights you and him stayed awake when Wakeheart wasn’t having a good time with the business. You did everything in your power to help bring the business back up, you promised him you would. And you did, in just a couple of months, Wakeheart’s sell rates were through the roof, just because of you.

“I did it because I loved you. And I still love you,” you sighed, carefully wiping tears away, even if they were gonna continue to fall.

“I don’t know what was going through your fucking mind Bailey, but at least you came to your senses now. Even if it’s too fucking late,” you said with a little laugh causing him to smile.

“Grayson I’m always going to love you, but you hurt me. You hurt me in the way I was most scared to get hurt in. I’m a firm believer that once you love someone and it’s real, your love for them will never go away, you just have to find someone who you’ll love even more.” you said as he watched you with a pained smile on his face.

“I don’t think there’s someone who I’ll love more than you,” he whispered and you nodded your head.

“Me too Bailey, me too, but I don’t trust you anymore and I can’t be in a relationship with you pretending I trust you when I don’t. Just because you hurt me doesn’t mean I need to hurt you,” you sighed. “Time will hurt and time will heal, it’s just a matter of patience and right now I’m running out of patience so I’m gonna go,” you sighed standing up before you fully broke down in front of him.

“Just remember that we’re still married by the church so thank the Catholic church for that,” you laughed causing him to chuckle.

“Why are you always funny, like it’s the worst time of my life and you’re making me laugh,” he asked while shaking his head with a smile on his face.

“I’m a funny person Dolan. And plus you only live once so why waste my time being mad, plus I know I’m gonna be depressed later so YOLO,” you said with a peace sign a goofy smile on your face hiding away your crumbling heart.

“YOLO,” he whispered, shaking his head.

“Take care of yourself, Grayson, I wish you the best,” you said walking to the door.

“You too Yeimy, I hope everything works out at Vogue,” he said and you nodded your head before walking outside and closing his door.

Hot mascara filled tears streamed down your face as you walked through the building and to your car.

Once you got inside your car, you let out a loud sob as you slammed your hands on the steering wheel.

The realization just kicking in. It was done. Everything was done, you were no longer married to the love of your life, as you drove away, you drove away from the love of your life.

“BUT I CRUMBLE COMPLETELY WHEN YOU CRY,” you shouted at the top of your lungs, singing along to 505 by Arctic Monkeys, your glasses hiding away your raccoon eyes caused by your ‘waterproof’ mascara which clearly lied.

You pulled up to the beach with the same song on repeat, something about it makes you feel slightly better.

You got out the driver's seat and sat on your trunk looking at the ocean.

Letting out a sigh that everything was over. Not everything just your marriage. Because when you told him, that you were always going to leave and no one else would compare, you were admitting it to yourself as well.

Grayson always made you happy, just knowing you were in the same room as he made you smile. Grayson was, and will always be your everything when it comes to relationships and dating. He was your rock, the one who took care of you when you were sick, even when you thought you didn’t need anyone. He stole your heart the first second you watched one of their videos when you applied for the internship. He and Ethan were one of the nicest men and human beings you ever met, and when he would flirt with you, you’d blush like a psycho.

Everything about him was so perfect, and your life with him was so perfect until he had to go fuck it up.

But you didn’t blame him for all of it. Ambar had something to do with it too. She was supposed to be your friend, hell you were the one that made Grayson give her the job. You vented to her about how you thought he was cheating on you, just for her to be the one he was doing it with.

You laughed at the thought of Ethan and Karina telling you she had bad vibes but you just pushed them away. Every time they told you that she did the same thing you did just two days after. If you got a new purse she would buy it the day later, a new dress? She was wearing it two days later. And when you would tell them about the things Grayson bought you, that you told him you didn't need, Karina would tell you about her angered facial expression and you would just tell her to chill.

You thought it was sad and funny that you realized that she was trying to be like you in every way possible this late. You just thought she was inspired by you, but she wasn’t. Deep down in Ambar’s heart, she hated you. She hated how you always seemed happy. Hated how the way you would talk about Grayson made him seem like there was no other girl in his eyes that was as pretty as you. She hated how you were always a good person. Hated how you would help anyone, even if they weren’t the nicest to you. And she hated how simple you were. She knew Grayson would give you the world if you asked for it, and she hated how you didn’t take advantage of it.

So she tried to ruin your life. Her jealousy got the best of her and she knew that by taking away the thing you love the most, it would balance out the universe and make you suffer. But she was wrong, because by trying to hurt you and being successful at that may I add, she lost a true friend, her job, her other friends. She lost everything leaving her even more miserable.

But she got what she wanted. Because now you were sad and heartbroken. Your life is missing a big piece of it.

You cried for three weeks straight. Every day before, between, and after work. You cried every day. Cried because you missed him. Because you missed home.

You missed being around him. Waking up in his arms. His forehead kisses. You missed waking up to him blasting Lil Wayne in the morning when he went to work out in the basement. You missed joining his workouts for less than five minutes because it was too much for you. You missed hearing his loud voice. You missed his laugh. His jokes. His un-funny jokes that you would still laugh at because it was funny he tried. You missed him trying to speak Spanish. You missed the flights to Jersey and sleeping in the laundry room because he wanted his alone time with you. You missed the car rides with him that were filled with music. You missed falling asleep on his chest. Trying out his new recipes that were sometimes a fail. Making cookies or just baking with him in general. Going to restaurants with him. You missed him teasing you about the way you were moaning from his touch. You missed the way he made you feel when he was fucking all the knowledge out of you. You missed laying in bed with him.

You missed him.

It’s been almost a month since you last saw him and you were feeling as if you were going through withdrawals.

Withdrawals because she took your drug away. Because the universe took your drug away.

Withdrawals because he was your drug.

Grayson was your drug.

Stages 6

Tags: @angelgrayson @rhyrhy462 @333dolans @vinylhazza @foxglovedolan @dolanissues @mercurygrant @persistence-ofmemories @dolansficsandpics @blindedbythelightt @kinkygrays @pineappledols @the-evolution-of-stupidity @evergreendolan @beatement-l @graydolan12

#Stages #Grayson Stages #grayson #grayson bailey #graysonbailey #grayson dolan #grayson dolan imagine #grayson x reader #grayson blurb #ethan dolan #Ethangrant #ethan dolan imagine #ethan dolan x reader #ethan dolan blurb #dolan #dolan twins #dolan fandom

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abloomntime · 3 years

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A Bloom In Time Ch 20 Starella

Poppy was exhausted.

All the hard working running around crawling through tunnels and cleaning everything even with help was hard. Didn't help that she also had to fix a hole in the attic. Luckily for her Hattie did have some nails and a hammer, so fixing it took at most seven minutes tops. But she still was feeling really exhausted. So she grabbed one of those adult sized dresses from the wardrobe which to be honest, she didn't find attractive at all. Both were a dark blue color with white laced collars and sleeves, studded with a row of obvious fake rubies. But hey. She needed something to wear if Snatcher was offering to repair her old blue one. So after a quick dip in the bathtub and brush of her teeth she returned wearing the gaudy thing and her old dress folded neatly to be handed to him. He sorta stared at her for a moment with her long slightly wet hair clinging to her and the strange dress she wore. But she didn't say anything other than what sounded as a mumbled thanks before taking the dress and a moment later disappearing in that cloudy mist of purple without a good bye. She supposed with all those letters cuz they weren't there after he disappeared. She was SO tired. She swore she could drop to the carpet right now and sleep for another thousand years or more.

Poppy yawned loudly and stretched out her back which popped, but didn't get much time to relax before a few tugs came from her dress and she looked down with a hum to meet the eyes of the children smiling up at her. "Yes?"

"Can you please read us a bed time story?," Bow asked politely smiling up at her. "Snatcher said our reward for helping was any story we wanted!"

"And I....*yaaaawn* suppose he told you I'd read it huh?" Both nodded and she sighed reaching a hand up to rub her face. "Oh, alright. G-Go take a bath and brush up. I-I'll meet ya'll there."

Honestly she was expecting a hallway to a child's bedroom to be less...I don't know...intimidating? But the dark purple carpet with black vines woven into them was something that sent a shiver down her spine. It was so spooky, but she bit her tongue and made it to her destination. All she remembered was flopping face first into the pillow pile and closing her eyes for just a moment to relax before those youngins came back a looking for her and demanding their story. Which is exactly what happened. She guessed she must've dozed off because she was violently shook back awake with a snort from her and she tiredly blinked those tired eyes open to two little smiling girls, dressed in star and cat printed pjs, and Hattie holding a book in her hands.

"Storytime!," Hattie loudly shouted and shoved the book at her in excitement.

Poppy blinked at it tiredly for a moment before sighing and picking up the book. "A-Alright. *YYAAWWWWNNN* Y-You two go get in bed and I'll Just..b-be there in a sec." She yawned loudly again as the two scrambled for the giant bed as she got up and walked over to it. Plopping herself down at the end of it and looking at them. The bed was big enough for three adults so there was easily enough room for the both of them there snuggled down in the blanket surrounded by toys. Smiling and eargerly awaiting for the reward Snatcher had promised them. Well she couldn't just not give them a story. With a yawn she turned to the book in her hands and blinked at the title. A single orange-red silhouette of a woman stood on the cover. "Starella?"

Hattie nodded. "Yeah! DJ Grooves gave it to us. He said it's the most popular story right now! We really like it! Please read it!"

Poppy gave a small smile and a smaller yawn. "Alright. Just settle down now." Turning her blue tired eyes back to the cover she sighed and read outloud. "Starella. Written by Pen Gwen. Illustrated by Sunny Shine." Opening the cover she saw the same Orange-red shadow of the woman on the cover next to a larger man's silhouette of the same color. Both were standing in front of a large mansion and pretty landscape. "O-Once upon a time far away in the milky way galaxy, there lived a kind man and his daughter. The man was a very wealthy business man and his daughter was one of the most magnificent people of heart and beauty in the land. With a firey passion and flare like fire, and kindness that shone brighter than the very sun. Because of such bright straits people often referred to her as a star among the people. So she was named, Starella." She turned to the next page and it had the same two orange-red people but this time with two other silhouettes of two women wearing dresses. The taller green person was holding hands with the orange man inside what looked to be a princess's library. "One day Starella's father fell in love with a beautiful widow who had a daughter close to Starella's age. But the woman's beauty hid a cruel heart of greed that would ultimately reveal itself-" Poppy jumped when Hattie suddenly blew a raspberry at the picture and Poppy blinked at her. "Now what was that all about? I thought I was reading this here story pretty well."

Hattie huffed and crossed her arms pouting. "Those pecknecks need to get lost."

"Hey!" Poppy pointed at her. "Watch your language young lady! One more curse outta you and I'm going to stop right here."

Bow scowled and nudged Hattie who groaned. "Fine. I'm sorry."

Poppy nodded. "That's better. Now don't let me here either of ya say that again." She turned back to the book and turned the page. It showed Starella, who she had now come to know as the female orange-red silhouette, staring out the window at a horse drawn carriage leaving the home. "One day her father's rich work came to a point where he had to leave for a year long business trip and left poor Starella in the care of her Stepmother, which is where the trouble began." She flipped the page again and it showed Starella washing dishes and mopping floors as the green stepmother stood in the doorway pointing. "Starella's Stepmother and stepsister were cruel to her. Taking away all her fine clothing and treasures and making her dress and work as a maid in her own home. Despite this she never lost that shiny kindness she was named for." Turning the page she got a whole new bunch of settings. A beautiful green landscape, a good sized town, and a giant castle. "One day the Prince of the land had finally become eligible to be married and his parents wanted nothing more than to know he found the right soul mate for him. So one day one of his fathers asked his son a question."

She turned the page again and paused. On the next page was two silhouettes of two men wearing crowns and sitting in thrones. One man a light blue and the other a dark red. Before them stood a young dark blue silhouette of a young man with his hair in a ponytail standing before them in some grand ball room. Wow. The artist really knew their stuff drawing all these details in didn't they?

" 'My son,' one of the Kings asked their son.," Poppy continued to read. " 'Your father and I are growing more old in age and one day you shall take responsibility over the kingdom and all who live in it. We must know, have you picked who will rule by your side?' The prince sadly hung his head before his two fathers and replied, 'Alas for I have not. For no one has caught my attention and no one has wanted anything more to do with me than my throne. I wish to meet someone I can love as much as they truly love me in return, but no one I have ever met had showed me such a thing.' " Poppy blinked in slight awe and turned the page as she focused more on the story. It had the same scene only the red king had stood up and was now pointing at the dark blue prince. " 'I have a grand idea!', the king yelled for all to hear, 'One that shall solve this problem. We shall invite all the eligible people in the land no matter commoner or noble. From them you can choose who you shall wed!'" Poppy turned the next page and it showed a yellow silhouette man handing out letters to other men and women silhouettes of various colors and shades. "The prince happily agreed. So a message was sent out to every young eligible man and woman no matter commoner or wealthy noble." She turned the next page and she saw the same yellow messenger standing in front of the doorway holding out a letter to the green stepmother.

"Poppy?" She hummed and looked up to Hattie who gave a tiny yawn before asking, "What does eligible mean?"

"Oh. I-I *YAWN* means you're able to be able to do something. L-Like how we're all eligible to sleep." The little girl responded with an 'Oh' and the red head looked back to the book. "One day a letter arrived at Starella's home. Offically inviting Starella and her step sister to the grand ball." She turned with a yawn to the next page which had both the step mother and stepsister's figures glaring down Starella. " The Stepmother and Stepsister were overjoyed. 'This is your chance!,' the Stepmother said to her daughter, 'You are the most beautiful young lady in the land! You must make the prince fall in love with you and you shall become the queen! Then we shall both live the rest of our lives in peace.' Starella politely asked if she could go but the stepmother ignored her in favor of showering her own daughter in praise and telling her what needed to be done for their goal." Poppy yawned again loudly as she turned the next page. Shaking her head and looking at the next page which showed the same scene from before but this time Starella was glaring back instead of her face turned down. "Days passed and the day of the ball came to be. Defying her Stepmother's wishes she stole back one of her fancy dresses and said to her stepmother, "I don't care what you say anymore. I will be going to the ball and my father shall hear of your ways.' With that Starella marched up the stairs to get herself ready for the ball that night. Enraged by Starella's actions the stepmother and stepsister decided to seek revenge."

Poppy again turned the page and it showed the mansion at night time and a carraige being driven away from the house, Starella was looking out one of the windows. Night time....sounded like a great time to get some well deserved sleep. Her tired body ached and she yawned again, those eyes slowly closing ....closer....closer.... She yelped when something made the bed move a bit and looking over found it was Hattie looking tired but pouting.

"C'mon. What happened next?"

"Huh...OH! RIGHT!!" Blue tired eyes looked back to the page. "Without Starella knowing the carriage to take them to the ball arrived. As quickly and quietly as mice, the two slipped away and made off into the night. By the time Starella noticed, it was too late." She turned the page and it showed Starella in a flowing dress on the kitchen floor in a crying pose. "Distraught. Starella sat by the kitchen fire to warm herself and weep her sorrows away. 'Do not be said', cried a woman's voice." Turning another page, it showed Starella gazing up at the kitchen window where a white duck was perched. "Startled, Starella turned her face up towards the sound of the voice and saw a tiny duck perched in her window. 'Who are you?," Starella asked. 'I am the great Mother Goose.,' the duck replied, 'Do not weep. Dry those tears. You saved me when those two wicked women wanted to fry me for dinner, and now I shall repay your kindness in full. Bring me one chess knight that's snow white, a nutcracker, and one apple from the pantry. Now hurry. We haven't got much time.'" She turned the next page and it showed Starella holding a bright red apple and the white horse piece from a chess board game outside. " She....*YYYYAAAAWWWNNN* quickly did as the duck asked and brought what she needed. 'Lay them upon the ground and stand aside,' the duck said. Starella quickly did as she was told as the duck waved her wing over the items. "

"Poppy?"

"Yes?"

"*yawn* W-What's a chess knight?"

"It's the little pieces of the game chess that look like ponies," she replied before turning another page tiredly and there was a pretty sight. A beautiful red carriage with the door held open by a handsome man in a suit, and the most beautiful white horse at the front. "Before her very eyes the items turned into a magnificent couch with a horse and driver to navigate it. As Starella climbed into the couch, Mother Goose perched upon the door to give one final warning. 'I hope you find the happiness you seek, but remember this,' she warned, 'You must leave by Midnight for that is when my magic will fade away and you shall be stranded.' Starella promised the Mother Goose she'd remember the warning and bid the goose good bye as it flew into the sky, and the couch slowly made it way towards the castle." Turning to the next page it showed the castle and the steps leading up to the grand entrance and sitting on the stairs gracefully was the dark blue prince. "Unknownst to her the prince was awaiting within the entrance to the grand castle, tired from the large gathering of crowded people inside and not having the desire to having others and so many seeking him out at once. But suddenly he saw the most unusual sight." Turning the page again, it showed the red apple couch pull up to the castle steps. "The most radiant of red couches he had ever seen appeared pulled by the most purest of white horses. Surely this must've been someone important. As Starella emerged from the couch, the prince was entranced by her beauty as she stepped towards him." Another page turn, reveling the two figures looking at each other on the stairs. "Taken by her stunning beauty, the prince stood to greet the fair maiden and welcome her to the castle. Moved by the handsome strangest politeness she asked what he was doing out here all alone, and he replied, 'It is because it became too crowded for my liking. I wished to come out here and take a break and talk to someone. But you look new around to the castle. My I offer to show you around the castle?' Starella agreed and took the arm the man offered her. Leading her into the castle above."

Poppy took a moment after turning the next page to turn to look over at the Girls. Hattie was snoring away flopped back against the pillow. But Bow was still wide awake, smiling at her and pointing to the book. Where it showed the duo standing in the middle of a very crowded room filled with other colorful silhouettes.

"Next page please."

Poppy smiled and figured she might as well finish the book for the one who was still awake. "Well...Starella and the prince spent the entire ball together sharing each other's interests and experiences, getting along so very lovely enraptured by each others' personalities. As time went on Starella forgot all about Mother Goose's warnings as they talked, laughed, and danced the night away. But that all changed in a blink of an eye." The next page beheld Starella running away from the prince who had his arm outstretched out for her and a giant clock tower shone from behind them with the face reading midnight. "The clock struck midnight and everything the Mother Goose had ever said came rushing back to her. In an instant full of dread, Starella fled from the Prince and to the exit but it was too late. The couch had transformed back into an apple. The horse to a chess knight. And the handsome couchman back into the nutcracker. Having no other choice, Starella fled down the road into the night back towards her home." New page, new scene of the prince in the middle of the crowd with everyone looking at him. "Determined the prince announced that same night that he would love nothing more than to again meet this mystery lady and he was determined to meet her again." Another page showing the stepmother and stepdaughter home glaring at Starella again. "Because the castle was so crowded Starella's Stepmother and Stepsister had not seen her at all, and so paid no attention to her upon arriving home. Only caring about the Prince's proclaim." New page showed the prince riding through town on a beautiful white horse through town. "For days the prince searched far and white for the maiden with bright kindness and hair that shown brighter than any star. No one could tell him who this mysterious maiden was and he was beginning to lose hope when he finally reached the home of Starella and her step family. Where he finally found what he seeked." Turning the page it showed the prince kneeling, face pointed towards the floor, and holding her hand the green figures of the stepfamily behind them. " 'At last I have found you,' he said with glee, 'Starella, I have searched far and wide because before no one had ever showed me the kindess you have. With your p-permission..*YAAAAWWN* I-I would love nothing more than to learn more about you.' "

Poppy didn't notice but Bow had already long since laid down to sleep as well, but she kept going reading the story to it's end as her own body was slowly falling into the same spell of sleep they had by the Sandman. The next page showed Starella's father pointing outside standing in the doorway pointing as the Stepmother and Stepdaughter fled.

"Starella happily agreed and her father returned. Upon hearing what her Stepmother and Stepsister had done while he was away, he banished them from his home never to return again." She turned to the last page where it showed a very elaborate wedding and the Prince and Starella being the ones to be wed. "After a few years of letting their love and fondness for each other grow, Starella and the prince were finally married. The End."

The book was slowly closed by the red head along with her eyes and with another loud yawn, sleep had finally claimed the last lady there. All three sleeping peacefully until the morning had come.

#Snatcher #a hat in time snatcher #a hat in time florist #A hat in time the florist #The Florist #florist #florist x snatcher #the florist x snatcher #snatcher x florist #Snatcher x the florist #ABloomInTime #flowercrown

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selfcareparker · 3 years

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(lovely anon) i'm so happy to finally be answering this oh my goodness hi gorgeous human being i feel that it has been too long 🥲 SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED SINCE THE LAST TIME I'VE WRITTEN ONE OF THESE HOW HAVE YOU BEEN

to answer the things you have said most recently- i'm so mad that spring break is over bc now i have to go back to life??? like dancing and school and shit that feels so unnessacry 😭 and like i can't just do nothing anymore? i was so used to it and now...... ugh. i STILL haven't played sims (i think it's because ✨depression✨ be hitting sometimes) lol but MWAHAH IM SO HAPPY FOR YOUR NEIGHBOR!AU AND THAT THEY HAD LITTLE BABY LEO!! i feel the name thing.. i just come up with something that sounds nice? i think leo is a nice name, it makes me think about lea michele and the fact that her son's name is Ever Leo but anyway. i don't name my sims after what i want to name my children irl either... idk why though. (i don't know why i'm telling you this but for boy names i love Liam🥰 and if i had twin boys i think i would do Liam and Peter though i am not married to the name Peter.... anywho)

LMAOOO the therpaist coming made me laugh thank you :)) i hope it's helpful? this may be tmi but i've only really had negative thoughts recently and not many healthy outlets so i'm hoping crossing one thing off this sad list will make me feel better :') i think during spring break my anxiety and my depression really spiked? idk, it comes in episodes but yeah THIS GOT REALLY SAD

i think a lot of things when i read your posts but i never say them hahaha so imma say it now: i googled what bon appetit meant ( i also just had to google how to spell it ) but ur right, i feel like bone apple tea makes more sense than bone apple teeth.. the "th" is throwing me off bc how i say it bone appa (like app-a) teet (like you're saying tit but teet lol) so bone apple tea makes more sense to me lol

i never know really know the time difference for anything lmao but est to germany (that's not gmt is it?) is like 6 hours wOAH so it's like 9pm while it’s 3pm here? wowee

i feel mega weird after watching this show called hollywood (darren criss is in it, so is laura harrier and a bunch of other people) but i don't like it💀 i feel really icky rn and idk why but reading your last response to my ask (?) always makes me feel better :')

i am doing what you said btw, i'm typing this on my computer first then gonna transfer it to my phone's tumblr lol but when you said a digital detox, it's interesting cuz i feel like i've been having one since tom's new project was announced? gOD i don't wanna get into it bc i get so triggered but i've been off of instagram since then bc instagram stans literally stand by tom through whatever even when something ain't right- i’m just gonna leave it there bc i’ll continue the rant, but yeah so i took a break lol

also heard abt your driving lesson thing (?) was it that bad? i can't find the old post but someone asked if you hooked up with your lesson person and i was sOOO CONFUSED LMAOO LIKE OK ARIA GET SOME BUT UHH HUH?

now to address the actual response HAHA the way you touch my heart :') by :') bringing :') up :') halle :') being ariel :') (i honest to God don't remember if i brought this up first, forgive me if i did, it's been a minute lmao) i'm always talking about it and i'm pretty sure my family is so tired of me talking about it lmao, but YEAH when i found out they weren't twins i was so surprised but idk why i always thought they were twins? but YOU ARE SPEAKING MY LANGUAGE WITH THE DISNEY TALK- everyone is always like "tiana is my favorite princess" and yea she's strong and stuff but...... she was a frog. for almost the whole time. it's about time we got another one!! i do agree with some people on the fact that disney should just make another black princess but halle is adorable and i was ariel on stage so it's already really special to me :')

yeah lol there are good times with my brothers but they make me mad for a good portion of the time (there's the 12yo vincent and the 7yo daniel but vincent??? psshhh he is a piece of work and i'm not sure how much longer i can put up with him HAJAH AND YES VINCENT IS THE ONE WHO WAS 👁👄👁WHEN I CRIED AND THE ONE WHO DOESN'T LISTEN TO MUSIC- writing this now makes it sound like vincent is awful. which he isn't... we're working on him ig. not to add to the awfulness but no, he listens to obnoxious loud VIDEO GAME MUSIC and won't stop when we ask him to stop... he gets beat up a lot) anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌

yeah let me know if you end up watching it (wandavision)! i think it's great but if you like it lmk!! tfatws is sooo good like PHEW i am honestly loving it. sidenote: j*hn w*lker makes me wanna jump through the screen and choke him to the ground. i was thinking right, and the falcon and the winter soldier (THATS SO MUCH EASIER FAJHKDAH) would techinally be like a 10 hour movie right? because every episode is an hour long and there'll be 10 episodes? like wow. i get what you mean though, abt the racism in the show etc, like looking forward to it but not like..... no i get what you mean i will not try and give another example lol but you make me wanna learn more languages like really badly (bc of what you said about the german to american translation) & if you end up watching hamilton PLEASE LMK ABT THAT TOO HAHAHA i love it so much, same thing with lion king lmaoo

speaking of germany, i was at lunch on saturday with my mom and her friend and we were talking about my schooling and like-- she planted this idea in my head lol like what if i just got my GED and went around the world (to england probably) to get a theatre experience??? and i think it sounds so cool but no where near practical lol, it's just..... the dream haha and i would then try and learn a language 😉

uh yes we absolutely should order basically a resturant meal at a cinema, how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?

also about cherry (which i still haven't watched yet lol) i got the timestamps from tumblr😌 i couldn't find them anywhere else, but i agree, i probably wouldn't even look twice at cherry if tom wasn't in it? like i liked tdatt a lot, but it's not a movie i would be itching to see ya know?

HAHAHAHA THE 24 HOUR NOTIFICATION- i think i have around 1030 hours on sims? but i've had it since 2019 lmao (reading the screenshots, yes u are 100% a genuis, i take screenshots too but on anon you can't upload them so i just read them and retype what i wrote lmao) i think the university experience in the game is fun, but time consuming and it's all work imo. idk why i do it so often tho 😭😭😭

and agreed!! when you're making good money in the game you have to find other ways to make it interesting. my cousins who play it just continously do "motherlode" and i'm like.... then what do you do in your game?? it just sounds boring to me... my current sims household, i had a famous comedian sim, her name was dylan, aND SORRY IM LAUGHING SO HARD WHILE WRITING THIS BC ITS A GREAT EXAMPLE OF THE UNI THING UNLESS IM JUST DUMB, she went to college for communications when i wanted her to be a comedian and when she graduated i realized that degree did nothing for the career 🥲 so yeah, i think i'm just dumb. but she had a kid in college, guy didn't stick around and she was pretty broke HA but then she got married to this (great) guy named steve, made good bank, had 5 more kids (two sets of twins and one more lol) but then she passed. uhm... yeah that's still an open wound . lol i'm kidding, but when you get rich like that, you have to find a way to make the game interesting and i chose a million kids.

(this was one giant paragraph until i broke it up uhh yeah) i seriously don't pay attention to the sims prices and just end up spending way too much money and not being able to finish the rest of the house😭 but then again, i'm so used to having sims live in apartments... if i end up building a house FIRST OF ALL it'll look like what you explained before lmao but i'll tell you if i actually end up building a house HAHA & planning out your sims game is so fun to me lol, did enisa and michael take in his daughter yet? i may be thinking too far ahead lol and i love that they fucked woohooed (i say woo woo lol) in celebration HAHA but when i was playing with this one couple i had them woo woo every night hoping the dude would have horrible pull out game and they would concieve, but one night they were too tired and i was like why? get back in there man. if i was in college and lived with my partner we would be fucking every night homie. be grateful. i have been talking a lot about sims, and like you said: enough 💀 i just love this game a lot 😭😭

SORRY LAST THING i think the sims romantic and sexual stuff is so nice bc its what i want?? LMAO IDK like the whole hot tub thing you're talking about- puh lease ITS JUST NICE TO SEE OKAY

i'm reading the german section over again and i said aloud "my german friend is so cool" lol (i was saying that to my brothers & i know they don't care LMAO) (& i'm glad the uni zoom call went well!!) so on a form, in german, it could possibily say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer because you would be a participant to an introductory event? i swear german sounds so cool 😌 but i love reading your german lessons!! it's really interesting, most of the time my brain can't comprehend it tho?? like that word makes sense to you, but i need a translation. like to be able to look at that and know what it says.... its just appealing and seems so cool lol i kinda wanna write something out in german but i feel that google translate will fail me. während googeln "google übersetzen" mein Computer war so verdammt langsam und es fühlte sich einfach wie etwas Gutes auf Deutsch zu sagen. ich bin nicht sicher, welches Wort ist "fucking", aber ich mag es lmao (did it fail me like i thought it would??)

LMAOOO THANK YOU FOR BRINGING UP JUSTIN BC WHILE AT THE RESTURANT THEY PLAYED A JUSTIN SONG AND I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT OF YOU AND THIS STORY😭 lol i was thinking it's depending on your age but not even that either... i really don't know.... but tom's fans are hollanders💀 i would consider myself one? he's the only person i'm really into like that (like a lot lol) so idk lmao (directioners 💔💔the pain is real)

LMAOOO (both of these paragraphs started off with “lmaooo” smh) "i like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death" PLEASE, i don't like pete's blonde hair... i just don't. i'm not sure if i wasn't watching the most recent snls but yea. my mom thinks he looks like trash, but i think he's okay? like he said staten island people just look like trash LMAO and I STILL HAVEN'T SEEN KING OF STATEN ISLAND GIRL I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THAT!! now i'm gonna make plans to watch it lmao, & yes agreed i find pete hot, don't ask why i really couldn't explain it to someone he's just .

my favorite songs from rex are from pony oh my goodness 🥺 anywho i'm gonna go eat cereal (i ended up eating bun and cheese instead) and listen to the Stormzy songs you recommended... aria. aria aria aria. i would like to thank you for introducing me to stormzy i- i don't have any words or any emojis to express HOW GOOD STORMZY IS. i hope he's popular in germany/the uk because i haven't heard of him but GURLLLL

one second - delicious i love it. it's really good. it’s not my favorite from the album, but its great.

superheroes - at first i played the non-explicit one (on accident) and wondered why the words weren't playing but i was reading them in the lyrics??? THIS ONE THOUGH??? IS THE BEST SONG I THINK I'VE EVER HEARD. i am so SO SO into black people empowering songs (like brown skin girl by beyonce) and this song???? PHEW I CRYYYYY ITS SO GOOD.... i was gonna quote some lyrics BUT THERS TOO MANY I LOVE, "i am young, black, beautiful, and brave" "black queen, you're immaculate, it's coming at the world, they ain't ready for your magic yet, and that was never your fault" THAT WAS NEVER YOUR FAULT- I ALMOST CRIED THIS SONG IS SO BEAUTIFUL (i played it twice lol)

lessons is another beautiful one, like its slow and it feels intimate and nurturing and just OO chefs kiss, beautiful . like you can feel the apology and the regret... it’s so good

own it - OWN IT OWN IT OWN IT IS AMAZING!! swear you would catch me dancing to this song, this song is so fucking good i cannot comprehend like this one might be my favorite for real... "it's the way you wind up your waist, i'm so in awe, you never have to worry abt nothing, you know its yours, you know you own it" 🥲 i played it two or three times honestly

rachael's little brother - YES I DID LISTEN TO IT LMAO AND YES I LIKE IT, its a very complex song and it's very layered in terms of emotions i think and i really like that about it. i probably won't listen to it that often, but its really good. i would recommend this song to my "older brother" bc he would just absolutely love this

shut up - i was taking this song seriously (also very good) until i heard him say shu-T up LMAO, this one is good, i probably wouldn't listen to it 24/7 like rachael's little brother but honestly its still fire

before listening to blinded by your grace and vossi bop, i know you brought up the religion bit, i definitely don't mind that, especially because i'm Christian lol and i actually liked that he brought up God in some of his songs like idk i just like it🥰🥰

(i then went to bed after that lol but first thing in the morning i listened to superheroes and... that song is probably my favorite tbh, i was gonna write MORE quotes that i loved from it but, yeah no there's too many. if you want i'll tell you lmao but this is already so long i would just be quoting the whole friggin song)

VOSSI BOP IS A BOP (lol) I CANT EVEN LIE, i love a song that hypes up a dude's girl so the line- i love that my phone decided to fail to load the lyrics, lemme google it, okay the lyric "looking at my girl like what a goddess" i was like AYEEE its honestly just really good. and no one in america says "sauce" like "i've got the sauce" but now i do (thanks to love island and Nas from last season) and now stormzy so (also im gonna watch the music video for superheroes bc it looks great so 😛)

(because this is already so long i feel like i shouldn't finish the rest but . no i'm gonna do it)

now for blinded by your grace pt2 idk why i’m nervous lmaoo PAUSE I'M NOT EVEN DONE WITH THE SONG GIRL THIS SONG IS *chefs kiss* no words, speechless PHEW y'all gon make me start jumping around. why did i not know about stormzy before, he is amazing i- ok yeah i finished the song, all i have to say is that Stormzy is immaclucate. period. i am literally sending his music to all my friends he is..... amazing

you want my song recommendations 🥺🥺 hmm uh okay lol i listen to a lot of old music, whitney houston, marvin gaye, queen, celine dion, i love "more than words" by extreme uhmm okay, but for actual music i listen to on the daily? (this is a lot of different music like.... they do not go together lmao so be prepared) a song about being sad by rex orange county, betty by taylor swift and lover by taylor swift and... most of that album lol, treasure by bruno mars lmao, OOOO and versace on the floor by bruno as well, lazybaby by dove cameron, creep by tlc has been on repeat lol, deja vu by olivia rodrigo (i saw what you said about drivers license and AGREED LMAO but i like deja vu a lot more haha) and two albums that i listen to in general, rare by selena gomez and ungodly hour by chloe x halle 🥰 you don't have to listen to all of them or any of them lol but that's a sense of what i'm into :) so basically everything haha, i'm into literally every single kind of music really so i wasn't too surprised that i enjoyed stormzy :’)

HAHASBSJHAHA your h20 story cracked me up,, like "wow these actors are so dedicated, learning german just for us" 😭 the beauty of overdubbing

once again, math and maths, in my mind maths makes sense because its mathmatics, but saying maths doesn't feel right to me lol, like if i said maths i feel like everyone would look at me like ??? and yea i was taught it as math so its just more natural for me. but yes math/maths is disgusting, easily one of my least favorite subjects so .

mkay. i- the first time i read this i could not contain my laughter when you said the only pollen you know is sex pollen LMAOKOOSHBABJFAJF STOPPP I'M EVEN LAUGHING WRITING THIS,, anyway. wow! that's interesting, my dad (<<< mostly anything else) gets migraines from the sun and the heat and stuff, yesterday (sunday, i was outside for like hours watching my brothers play football, the american kind lol) i was in the sun for like ever and i got a headache😔

summer clothes🥲 i need to go shopping fr fr. for my birthday my mom and dad got me a giftcard like dedicated to a shopping spree and we've yet to go so..... i should bring it up to my mom lol, but!! i went bra shopping (ended up returning literally all of them cuz they honestly didn't work for day to day work? its a long story) and if i could i would walk around in this new "summer bra" i got, i would. it's so fricking cute and its really light fabric (which isn't perfect for my nipples but still) so i don't get hot in it, but that bra and some shorts would be perfect. its the closest thing to being naked so

IS THE BIRD STILL BOTHERING U ARIA, TELL ME NOW ISTG, i laughed really hard that the bird isn't stupid and is really trying to torture you LMAOO like i was rolling, it wants you to suffer, badly

when you said "mensus" it was still close to mens!!! latin speaking queen 😌😌

okay STORYTIME i was reading back your response and started (fake) crying bc i love you lol and my youngest brother (daniel) gon say "oh man, catherine's crying about something we don't care about, again" I--- i swear when i tell you about them they sound awful, but they aren't that bad, just the stuff i say about them is sounds really mean LMAO

but the thing you said about being kind, same, what i always say is: don't be the person that makes people say "i hate people" ya know? like there's no reason to be a jerk or anything.... but its true 🥺🥺🥺🥺 you are really kind and every time i talk to you i would like to personally fly to germany and give you a hug 💖💕💞💗💓💝💖💘

& i'm gonna show my stretch marks some love bc of you 🥺😭 i really hate how men have basically everyone conditioned that you can't love your own body </3 fuck them, y'all beautiful :')

also thanks for what you said :')) you literally are the kindest, sweetest person i think i've ever spoken to and i love you 🥰🥺🥲💓💗

READING YOUR TAGS HAHAHHAHA the spelling errors makes everything so much funnier. once again, i like your german lessons & yea!! i'm gonna play sims after writing this hahah

#catherine's tags are back #i don't think i've told you my name before?? #anyway it's catherine🥰🥰🥰 #i'm typing this on my computer (without emojis) and if i didn't edit this you would be reading shit shite like #heartface and pout and cry LMAO #yeah abt the tattoos #some stuff with my parents i'm like deal with it??? lol #my mom tells me "if there's something you enjoy or you like but i don't have the same opinion on it... why would my (my mom's) opinion matter? #and i love that #like i'm not gonna go and do whatever i want #but if my mom doesn't like that i swear (which isn't true just an example) #its like okay.... #but whatever #and your tattoo ideas sound really cute!! #and yeah @ your parents, i mean you aren't getting something wild #and the tattoo album>>> #i'm gonna look up ariana's butterfly tattoos just so i know what you mean lol #but i'm guessing you don't want something so incredibily simple, but not super like over the top? #correct me if i'm wrong lol #LMAO the tags were in order don't worry ! #and yeah lol ily2 <33 #and once again, again, sorry for this post JSHJS ITS A MESS AND LONG AS HELL #and you don't need to go in order of my post its literally longer than your german compound words #u're fine #also !!! while writing this the birds were chirping outside and i was like 😳 #and one of your fics (i’ve read all of them, i don’t remember lol) that valentine’s day one where y/n had lingerie on (the pancake one lol) #inspired me to buy lingerie #like when i look back on me “growing up” #that fic & basically you lol really helped with that #that made no sense and i don’t know how to make it make sense... but... yeah. like ily

hiiiiiiiiiii <3333

Dear catherine, 😌

(you have said your name before, but it wasn‘t like an introduction or anything i think you were talking about .... was it possibly the incident at the cinema??? And you said something like ‘calm down catherine‘ like you were telling yourself to calm down idkd dkdkkdkd anyway i didn‘t mention it cause i wasn‘t sure if it was an accident or not dkdjd but now i know 😌❤️ Catherine is such a cute and lovely name btw omg and so are your brothers‘s names 🥰

Sorry that I‘m answering this so late, it‘s been an emotional rollercoaster for me since last week but i‘ll get to that in a second lol

Sksklssk girl i haven‘t played sims in like 2 weeks now ekejdkdlldld ok that‘s not that long at all actually but i keep wanting to play but then i end up not playing for whatever reason, so no news about my sims game 😔 but i love the names Liam and Peter and for twins!!! That sounds really nice actually

okay i‘m trying to answer your ask in chronological answer even though i wanted to wait for the depressing stuff and write it at the end or something OKAY so. i thought that i‘d feel so good when i start uni and that i‘ll like... have a purpose in life again and just be happy (cause in the last year i didn‘t do much and i was depressed like half of the time lol).... anyway i kind of feel even worse now? 😭 i think it‘s because in my brain it‘s like: university!!! that means your life will change and it‘ll all be so exciting. and don‘t get me wrong it is exciting butttt..... idk the online thing is so weird cause you‘re not meeting any new people (i‘m introverted anyway but still lol) and it doesn‘t feel like you‘re listening to/talking to actual people cause it feels the same as just watching a video?

also i thought i‘d be busy again but i only have one lecture (90mins) a day and theres one day where i dont have any lectures at all and just one day where i have 3 hours but.... idk i mean i shouldn‘t complain about having so much free time but i just don‘t know what to do all day and in a pandemic there really is nothing to do but i also can‘t relax bc it‘s like during the week and i know i have uni the next day and .... yeah.

There‘s also this one assignment i had to do that took me AT LEAST SIX HOURS AND IM NOT EVEN EXAGGERATING????? so that was the only thing i‘ve been doing besides “going to“ lectures. for this one course we have to read two (really really long) texts (like it literally took me 3 hours to read them) and we‘re supposed to post it on this website that all the professors in our uni use. So after 5 days of anxiety (✌🏼) i posted mine this morning bc last night i realised that i didn‘t even know why i was having anxiety so i just posted mine today. The deadline is tomorrow at 12 and no one except me has posted theirs yet........ so i have anxiety again 🥰 cause idk if i‘m the only one who did it or if i even did it correctly

Edit while i‘m rereading this: my anxiety about uni is a lot better and i‘m not as d*pressed anymore maybe it was just hormones? idk but i‘m better so that‘s good

(I started writing this like 5 hours ago and then i randomly completely forgot lol)

I‘m in a better mood now though so let‘s move on from that (oh wait also, i think i‘m gonna see if i can find a psychiatrist bc with my anxiety symptoms (long story) i need to go to a psychiatrist, and so far i‘ve only gone to like psycholgists and it didn‘t help but i think that‘s just bc i was meant to go to a psychiatrist and not a psychologist so dldjdjsj

n e ways but yes you‘re not alone, ily, things will get better and yes i love you (i‘m not good at this type of thing🥲 but i‘d hug you right now if i could <3)

Yess i think the time difference between est and me is 6hours but gmt is uk time i believe? i think mine is called.... cet? For central european time? I could be completely wrong though lmao

Oof i completely forgot about hollywood, i remember when laura kept posting about it on instagram but i never actually watched it and i definitely won‘t now lmaodkdksjsn

Okay my driving lesson LEBDJDKDK I DID NOT HOOK UP WITH ANYONE AKSJSKSMMLM especially not my 40 or 50 year old driving instructor lol i like her but NOT LIKE THAT, the lesson was really really really good actually and i think i‘ll have my driving test soon, but i don‘t even remember why the anon would have thought that??? Oh wait now i remember okay KEKSKDLDL so during the lesson my instructor was like do you mind if i turn on some music? AND THIS WOMAN TURNED ON ONE DIRECTION I LOVE HER so i made a post about it and i said something about the song up all night and i guess i phrased it in a .... idk in a dumb way 💀 so the anon made a joke that i stayed up with my driving instructor all night and NO. No.

Wait did i read that right? YOU WERE ARIEL ON STAGE? SIALDBDJDKSLMSBDKDMDMDKDJSLSMDJFJJEDMBFEKLEFBJDLDVSIDLESKSKWKDKDJDOWNYUEKWNDUWLNSUFLWVSUDLEHDOENSIDBEISBEHENJELBSIEMWUDNRIW KB WOBE JO ON SBEUU HIII S HWS LV W ICH US KB okay this keyboard smash is getting out of hand but uh please do elaborate on that 💘😌???? Like you can‘t just drop that information and not say more??? I forgot if you‘re in like your school‘s drama group (is that a thing? lol idk anything about acting) or in an independent group? Either way - ARIEL that is so fucking cool

Your brothers loooooool, no i get it though obviously you love them and stuff but esp at their age children are so annoying so good luck with them 😭😭😭lmao

Yeah “anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌“ yeah just me and my parents who constantly fight 🥰 lmao no i like being an only child, like i cannot imagine having siblings but i feel like if i had siblings i would be saying that i can‘t imagine being an only child so? but i do think it‘s quite different like i‘m trying to imagine having siblings and WHAT that‘s just so different omg i‘ve never really thought about it like properly ???

I saw a tik tok the other day that was like “sometimes i forget that my siblings have a life of their own. like i see them as side characters in my life“ and even though i can‘t relate obviously i felt that. lol, like i can really imagine how it feels idk what i‘m talking about like shut the fuck up, daria

(also my actual name is daria not aria but i dont like it, and also i wanted to be more anonymous on tumblr so now i‘m aria lmao. pls don‘t mention it though cause no one knows except for you and mel (peterbenjiparker) dkdkdkdnkdnd. but i‘m starting to identify with the name cause everyone keeps calling me that looool😭😭😭 (but i like the name, more than daria anyway? well it also depends on the accent, cause the way germans say daria is okay. the was Americans say it is also okay, but some of my family in England are from the north of england and i don‘t like how they say my name 💀 no offence to them(?) but yeah pls don‘t mention the name in your ask cause the chance of people seeing it is higher then (or if you want to say something about it just send a separate ask and i just won‘t post it (IDK what you‘d want to say about my name but yeah just in case slsldlldmsndnsns)

I‘m loving falcon and winter soldier so much but when i was watching an episode the week before last week (?) my laptop broke😭😭😭😭 during the scene where the dora milaje came at the end my laptop just shut down? And it had these lines all over the screen and i had to bring it to the shop where i bought it and they said it‘ll take 6-8 weeks to repair 💔💔💔 but at least it‘ll be for free, cause if i brought it back to apple it would cost like 400€ (i think that‘s nearly 500$) so yeah. but it sucks cause now i‘m “going to uni“ on a really old rusty laptop and on my phone which kinda sucks. oh yeah and also i can‘t watch anything on there 😭 i definitely want to watch wandavision but it‘ll have to wait🤧

Yessss you should def get your GED! I googled and I‘m still not entirely sure what it is dldks but from how you described it- YES!!!!!!

Idk if you know this? Like no idea if I‘ve told you this already (hmmm wait i feel like we talked about it actually?) anyway i was originally gonna go study in England, but for loads of reasons I ended up staying in Germany and I‘m def happy with my decision, but I definitely want to go to England sometime even if it‘s just for six months or maybe for my masters or something? And (obviously everyone is different) but i think everyone should go abroad and live in a different country once in their life, no matter if it‘s for school or what, and even if it‘s just for a few weeks. But i think that‘s something that you‘d never ever forget! And combining that with your acting/theatre??? You really would be living the dream 💘💘😌

how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?— sounds good see you soon 🥰🥰🥰

i used to be one of the people who‘d just do motherlode motherlode motherlode and just... what did i do? Why did i do that??? But not anymore lol. Like I said i haven‘t played sims in a few weeks but i‘ve been watching a few legacy challenge let‘s plays and usually i play with the aging off. So my sims just don‘t age 💀 but i could (should) turn aging on so that it stays exciting and i have limited time and everything. and once i get bored with my current sims i can just make them have kids and continue playing as their children when they get older- like recently i remembered that i haven‘t played the acting career in ages? and i haven‘t had a shop in ages? and i think you can even become a vet right??? like those are definitely some things i want to do in the next weeks!!! Also yes sksksjs i have a few hundred hours on sims as well (if not thousands 😭) it was just that one household that i‘d been playing with for 24hrs

AND GIRL SSKSKJD THE UNIVERSITY THING HAPPENED TO ME TOO, it was a while ago so i don‘t remember what degree and what job it was about but i made my sim study something for aaaaaages so she‘d get a better job from the beginning (you know what i mean like get in at a higher level)...... and i apparently studied the wrong thing cause i didn‘t get any benefits from studying and still had to start at level 1 and shit 🥴🥲

Oh also (this was like 2 weeks ago) Enisa and Michael did take in Michael‘s daughter and i think Enisa currently even has a higher/better relationship with the daughter than Michael but um💀💀💀 also i was hoping (since michael and enisa married (in their back yard i think lol) that the daughter (i forget what her name is😭) would have enisa as her step mom? Like you know how you can see the relationship and it says daughter or son or sister.. and i was hoping that it would say step mom but it doesn‘t say anything 🥲 but in my mind (and if the sims had proper family relations) she is her step mom😌 also Leo is a teenager now???? I mean I aged him up lol dkdk he was being too annoying as a toddler but i don‘t like children so i aged him up twice in one day and now he‘s a teen, but that means he can look after his half sister when she becomes a toddler which is good (the game recognises them as siblings tho even if they‘re just half siblings? why can‘t they have step family members in the sims🥲) okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

I‘ve been a bit sick these past few days and now i‘m getting a headache so i have to finish this response tomorrow 😭😭😭 </3

It‘s not tomorrow, it‘s 3 hours later but i‘m better lol

oooff when sims are ungrateful and won‘t woo woo (lol i like that) cause they‘re too tired like?? Be grateful that you‘re not living with your parents anymore 🙄 no okay dkdkdkdl idk if you play with mods (i don‘t) but i know there is a mod (or it‘s part of a mod idk maybe wicked whims?) where you can adjust the percentage of how risky a normal woo woo is, like you still click woo woo (3dksksks okay i‘ll say woohoo again— wait is that what’s it called? 😭) but there‘s like a 25% chance that your sim can still get pregnant just like in real life there‘s always a chance of getting pregnant even if you‘re using protection (just not 25% lmao) but yeah i personally don‘t play with mods sksk and you can always just click try for baby but it would be cool if you could add stuff like risky woohoo to the game without mods (i have no idea how to download mods and i play sims on a really really old laptop and sims is literally tje only thing that works on it anyway so—) i repeat my words from earlier: okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

okay i‘m so sorry i‘m gonna watch fast & furious 1 now cause i need to watch f&f 1-5 until the 30th of april cause they‘re only on netflix til then (i mean i could watch them somewhere else but the quality is never as good) so i will finish this tomorrow after all😭

it is now 1 am, i finished the film, can feel a new obsession coming up again (i always have these f&f obsessions for six months before and after a new film comes out)

THE GOOGLE TRANSLATE wkekdjdj tbh it sounds like someone is speaking with some kind of foreign accent i guess that‘s probably because it just is a direct translation and so anyway slsjsj i don‘t know if you asked me what the word fucking is in german? like idk cause the translation is a bit weird but in case you asked lol sidjsjs theres not really a good translation like we just say fuck for fuck lmao, i don‘t know if you typed in fucking in google translate and it came out as verdammt? cause that means damn (or damned sksjjs) ummm yeah idek if/what you asked so imma move on🤧

I‘m not gonna comment on what you said about every stormzy song cause you already said all the important things but SKSKSJSJSKNSNDBDUDOENWBSLSKKHSULSLSKSBSJSKSK I WAS SMILING SO HARD WHEN I READ YOUR RESPONSE FOR THE FIRST TIME BECAUSE AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH finally i know someone who loves him as much as i do 💘💘💘 also since you brought it up, i‘m pretty sure he‘s considered the most successful UK rapper or if not then at least top 3 so he‘s defffffffffinitely big in the uk, in germany more and more people are listening to uk rap too but not as much stormzy cause theyre dumb apparently 🙄 but anywY i‘m sooooo sooo happy that you like him. i think hith came out end of 2019 (i could be wrong but i think it came out on the 13th of december so (in a european way) you‘d write the date: 13.12 and obviously i don‘t KNOW this but i can definitely imagine that he chose that date because ACAB and yes, Michael. Yes. But he hasn‘t made too much music since then so i hope he‘s working on some new stuff 🤞🏼

Also i ordered the stormzy poster😌 also a nicki minaj one bc i decided i‘m gonna have one wall with red-ish posters (i already have two kinda red ones) and one with blue/green-ish posters (already have two) and i can add stormzy to the blue one and nicki to the red one, but i think that‘s it cause if my walls are tooo full it could look cluttered? I‘m not sure how that type of thing works lmao but my room is generally untidy so i don‘t want the walls to look unorganised too so i think that‘s it for now

I really want to finish this now but my brain is getting kinda slow and i need to sleep soon so this will have to wait till later after all 🥺🥴 (not that it makes and difference to you bc you‘ll see this whenever i post it buttttt i wanted you to know that i want to talk to you again but with my slow brain i‘m just taking too long to do it in one day😭😭😭 and i‘m so busy tomorrow hmm but i‘m sure i‘ll have 30 minutes to finish this then <3)

Okay wait I‘m so dumb I didn‘t realise I‘d nearly answered everything i could have posted this yesterday 😭😭

Oooohh that summer bra sounds so nice like if i was confident enough i literally would just wear a top that resembles a bra (or really is a bra lol) cause my tiddies always be looking amazing i‘m just insecure about my stomach sometimes 🙄🙄🙄 but recently i‘ve been loving myself more and more tbh 😌

also i hope you can go shopping for some nice clothes soon ✨😌

I‘ll be honest I haven‘t listened to your song recs YET but only because i wanna take my time with them and i‘ve been so busy and slso AJ tracey‘s album came out last week and I haven‘t listened to that one yet either so ekdkdj (he‘s also a uk rapper like quite popular and successful as well, but i feel like i‘m not gonna like his album cause whenever i‘m looking forward to an album it ends up being really bad and the albums where you weren‘t expecting it turn out to be bangers.... so yeah but i‘ll let you know when i listen to your songs!!!! :)

Omg i keep having to scroll up all the way to see the next thing you said so sorry if I completely miss some of the things you said😭😭

So when you sent this the bird was still bothering me oh my FUCK DKDLDMMDMDMD but now i‘ve been going to bed at like 1-2am so the bird is probably still asleep lool

Okay and for the rest of your ask my response is: 💘💖❣️💚❣️💛❣️💛💕💞❤️💓💟💞💕💕💖💘💝💟💟🧡❤️🧡💞💛💚💓💚💚💚❣️🧡💖💘🧡💝🧡💕💘🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥰🥺🥺💘💘💘💘💘 (okay that looked cuter in my head i don‘t really like the green hearts dldkkdksndnd)

#lovely anon #<3333333333333 #‚‘it‘s literally longer than your german compound words‘ LMAODKDMSLDKSLKS #ignore the comma at the beginning of the last tag????#aww wait i just read what you said at the end of your tags🥺🥺💘💘💘#love youuuu #ooooof i‘m reading my response and do i not know what a period is? like period as in. full stop.#my sentences are literally paragraphs and i use keyboard smashes to separate sentences from each other like what‘s wrong with me???#or ‚lol‘ snd ‚lmao‘#imma need me to do better (did you listen to heavy is the head as a whole? like the whole album? the song do better is stuck in my head toda #today so)#i‘ll try to write normal length sentenced in the future💀#sentencessss*

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hamanuelton · 4 years

Text

my favorite parts of hamilton:

- “I imagine death so much it feels more like a memory.”

- every time Leslie Odom Jr. as aaron burr begins another part with “how did a bastard, orphan-“ or like in that same way ‘cause he doesn’t always start it that way but you know what I mean

- the way Leslie Odom Jr. as My Boi Burr™️ says “well, the world got around, they said, ‘this kid is insane, man!’”

- also when Leslie Odom Jr. as A. Burr says

“WHAT’S YOUR NAME, MAN?!”

- “our man saw his future drip-dripping down the drain, a pencil to his temple, connected it to his brain”

- “Alexander Hamilton. My name is Alexander Hamilton. And there’s a million things I haven’t done, but just you wait, just you wait...”

- background “just you wait, just you wait”’s as hammy’s putting on a new jacket and ensemble is praising nyc

- “and me? i’m the damn fool that shot him.”

- “Burr, sir” + the continuation of this all throughout

- “If you talk you’re gonna get shot” / FORESHADOWING WOOOEEEEWOOOOO

- “i’m John Laurens in the place to be”

- Lafayette’s fuckinf accent

- “BRRRAH! BRRAAAH! HERCULES MULLIGAN UP IN IT LOVIN IT”

- “if you stand for nothing, Burr, what’ll you fall for”

- “‘Onarchy?”

- hey, yo, i’m just like my country, i’m young, scrappy, and hungry—

- the way Odom Leslie Jr. as The Hamburrglar™️ says ‘shot’ and they all take a shot

- this ⤵️

- Hammy getting //flustered// about friendship

- WHEN ARE THESE COLONIES GONNA RISE UP

- Angelica’s face when Burr is tryna tell her bout herself and she shows him up and ships him out

- Act 1: 6. Farmer Refuted

- honorable mention: “my dog speaks more eloquently than thee!" "but strangely, your mange is the same." "is he in jersey?”

- King George pouting

- Jonathan Groff’s overarticulation of each syllable as King George is a work of art

- “♪ Da-da-da-dat-da-dat-da-da-da-dai-ah-da! ♪ Da-da-da-da-dai-ah-da! ♪

- “Everybody! —“

- “We keep meeting.”

- “i imagine death so much it feels more like a memory. when’s it gonna get me? in my sleep? seven feet ahead of me?”

- “See, I never thought I’d live past twenty.”

- “this is not a moment, it’s the movement”

- “I’m laughin’ in the face of casualties and sorrow, for the first time, I’m thinkin’ past tomorrow!”

- “dying is easy, young man, living is harder!”

- “i’m being honest. i’m working with a third of what our Congress promised.”

- “you need all the help you can get. i have some friends. Laurens, Mulligan, Marquis de Lafayette, okay, what else?” — “we’ll need some spies on the inside, some king’s men who might let some things slide.”

- “watch this obnoxious, arrogant, loudmouth bother be seated at the right hand of the father.”

- “Martha Washington named her feral tomcat after him” — “That’s true.”

- “Yo, if your marry a sister, you’re rich, son!” — “Is it a question of ‘if’, Burr, or which one?” and then the little ‘hey’ ‘hey’ thing they do gets me every time

- literally the use of yo throughout the production fucking gets me every single fucking time

- “i’m writin’ a letter nightly. now my life gets better, every letter that you write me. — THE PURE UNBRIDLED SENSE OF FORESHADOWING IN “laughin’ at my sister, cuz she wants to form a harem” — ft. “i’m just sayin’, if you really loved me, you would share him!”

- the irony in “Eliza, i don’t have a dollar to my name”, you’ll be on the $10 bill, my man

- top-notch brain

- Angelica TRIED TO TAKE A BITE OF ME

- the way Anthony Ramos as John Laurens says “alright, alright. that’s what i’m talkin’ about!” and also the face that he makes

- hunger-pang frame

- “You strike me as a woman who has never been satisfied.” — “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean. You forget yourself.” — “You’re like me. I’m never satisfied.” — “Is that right?” — “I have never been satisfied.” — “My name is Angelica Schuyler.” — “Alexander Hamilton.” — “Where’s your fam’ly from?” — “Unimportant. There’s a million things I haven’t done but just you wait, just you wait...”

- tbh the way ‘Schuyler’ is spelled is oddly satisfying to me

- honestly just the way LMM says Alexander Hamilton+/ my name is Alexander Hamilton, and there’s a million things i haven’t done, ‘just you wait, just you wait...’ throughout the production

- “i’m the oldest and the wittiest and the gossip in new york city is insidious”

- “You are the worst, Burr.”

- Act 1: 12. The Story of Tonight (Reprise)

- “love doesn’t discriminate, between the sinners and the saints, it takes and it takes and it takes”

- “love doesn’t discriminate, between the sinners and the saints, it takes and it takes and it takes and we keep living anyway. we rise and we fall and we break and we make our mistakes. and if there’s a reason i’m still alive when everyone who loves me has died—“

- “Chick-a-plao!”

- the way they say ‘raise a glass’ is both elegant and (appropriately) reverent

- “i go back to new york and my apprenticeship” — i shouted MY BOI HERCULES MULLIGAN UP IN IT LOVIN IT DID NOT JUST SAY THAT, IF HE ACTUALLY LEFT AND ISN’T JUST UNDERCOVER OR SOME SHIT IMMA WRITE LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA A STRONGLY WORDED LETTER

- the minute General Charles Les came into the picture i hated him so hard, even though his literal first word was ‘Whee!!!!’, though i can appreciate the sentiment and what LMM was tryna do there

- “Washington cannot be left to his devices indescisive, from crisis to crisis” — sweet baby jesus that alliteration, and jon rua totally pulled it off (i hate General Charles Lee not the person who played him, i can also appreciate the fact that as an actor it takes a lot of talent to be able to make you hate a character so easily, also shoutout to Jonathan Groff as King Georgey-Boy™️, Sydney James Harcourt as james reynolds, and the general way LMM somehow made me fed up/turn on Alexander with the whole scene with him and Maria Reynolds — and not only that but somehow redeemed himself to me which is easier said than done for characters and people alike.. i’ve been hurt too much to play like that.

- Act 1: 15. Ten Duel Commandments

- honorable mention: “if you don’t reach peace, that’s alright. time to get some pistols and a doctor on site. you pay him in advance, you treat him with civility. you have him turn around so he can have deniability.”

- Act 1: 17. That Would Be Enough

- honorable mention: the melody that LMM went with for that turn of phraseis a truly beautiful thing

- “Immigrants:” — “We get the job done.”

- THE FACT THAT MY MAIN MAN HERCULE MULLIGAN WAS ON THE INSIDE NOT ONLY DID I CALL IT BUT DAMN HE REALLY GOT THAT GOOD HOT TRIBUTE HE DESERVED

- “To my brother’s a revolutionary covenant! I’m runnin’ with the sons of liberty and I am lovin’ it! See, that’s what happens when you up against the ruffians. We’re in the shit now, somebody gotta shovel it! Hercules Mulligan, I need no introduction, when you knock me down I get the fuck back up again!”

- Act 1: 21. What Comes Next

- honorable mention: “i’m so blue” — the little squat that Groffsauce does as the light turns blue really got to me

- Act 1: 22. Dear Theodosia

- Leslie Odom Jr.’s voice is so ding dang delightfully airy

- honorable mention: “You have my eyes. You have your mother’s name. When you came into the world, you cried and it broke my heart.”

- Act 1: 23. Non-Stop

- as someone with siblings i can appreciate that they’re bickering like that’s just what they are

- “I was chosen for the constitutional convention! *squeal*”

- “Burr, we studied and we fought and we killed for the notion of a nation we now get to build. For once in your life, take a stand with pride. I don’t understand how you stand to the side.”

- Act 2: 1. What’d I Miss?

- honorable mention: “But the sun comes up and the world still spins.”

- Act 2: 2. Cabinet Battle #1

- honorable mention: “DOIN’ WHATEVER THE HELL IT IS YOU DO IN MONTICELLO!”

- tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow

- “Daddy, daddy, look.... My name is Philip. I am a poet. I wrote this poem just to show it. And I just turned nine. You can write rhymes but you can’t write mine.” - “What!” - “I practice French and play piano with my mother.” — “Uh-huh!” — “I have a sister but I want a little brother.” — “Okay!” — “My daddy’s trying to start America’s bank. Un deux trois quatre cinq!” — “Bravo!” — “Hey, our kid is pretty great.”

- as much as i hate Act 2: 4. Say No To This (because for some reason i though Alexander Hamilton was better than that) Jasmine Cephas Jones sings in it is like a hot knife through butter — namely; “My husband’s doin’ me wrong beatin’ me, cheatin’ me, mistreatin’ me...”... I guess maybe I understand it ‘cause damn Jasmine Cephas Jones is so ding dang pretty and ding dang talented and wow what a remarkable person

- the way that Lin says “And her body’s saying, ‘hell, yes’ is um.. 😓

- “You see, that was my wife you decided to” — “Fuuuu—“

- Act 2: 5. The Room Where It Happens

- honorable mention: “Bros.”

- “Talk less. Smile more.” LMM being a dramatic bastard

- Act 2: 6. Schuyler Defeated

- Act 2: 7. Cabinet Battle #2

- “revolution is messy but now is the time to stand."

- honorable mention: “Ooh!!”

- “We signed a treaty with a King whose head is now in a basket. Would you like to take it out and ask it? ‘Should we honor our treaty, King Louis’ head?’ ‘Uh... do whatever you want, I’m super dead.’”

- Thomas Jefferson all like “but sir do we not fight for freedom” MY BAD SIR YOU ARE A SLAVE-OWNER HOW ABOUT YOU NOT

- mentioning Lafayette because apparently LMM has no problem with breaking the fourth wall

- “Daddy’s calling.”

- “I’m in the cabinet. I am complicit in watching him grabbin’ at power and kiss it. If Washington isn’t gon’ listen to disciplined dissidents, this is the difference. This kid is out!”

- “Southern motherfuckin’ Democratic-Republicans!”

- “The emperor has no clothes.”

- “Sir, I don’t know what you heard but whatever it is Jefferson started it.” — “Thomas Jefferson resigned this morning.” — “You’re kidding.” — “I need a favor.” — “Whatever you say, sir, Jefferson will pay for his behavior.” — “I’ll use the press. I’ll write under a pseudonym, you’ll see what I can do to him—“ — “Yes! He resigned you can finally speak your mind!” — “Ha. Good luck defeating you, sir.” - “I’m sorry, what?”

- Act 2: 10. I Know Him

- “—Vice President.” — “— No more Mr. Nice President.”

- “Sit down, John, you fat motherf—“

- Act 2: 12. We Know

- honorable mention: “You see that was my wife you decided to—“ — “WHAT—“

- Act 2: 13. Hurricane

- Act 2: 14. The Reynolds Pamphlet

- honorable mention: *DEEP VOICE* “DAMN”

- Act 2: 15. Burn

- i’ll be the first to say i wasn’t a huge fan of Eliza at first aside from Phillipa Soo’s killer voice

- this gave me a lot of respect for her

- honorable mention: “You have married an Icarus. He has flown too close to the sun.”

- Act 2: 16. Blow Us All Away

- i would like to point out that tweet where someone @‘s LMM about not mentioning Philip’s hot and he responds “I’M FAIRLY F**CKING SURE I DID”, y’know ⤵️

- “The ladies say my brain’s not where the resemblance stops.”

- “God, you’re a fox.”

- Act 2: 17. Stay Alive (Reprise)

- The ‘I know, I know. Shh.’ and the full circle back to his mom teaching him french on the piano really got to me for the beautiful artistry in it but also damn them feels

- Act 2: 18. It’s Quiet Uptown

- “I spend hours in the garden. I walk alone to the store and it’s quiet uptown. I never liked the quiet before. I take the children to church on Sunday, a sign of the cross at the door, and I pray. That never used to happen before.”

- “Philip, you would like it uptown. It’s quiet uptown.”

- “You knock me out, I fall apart.”

- “Eliza, do you like it uptown? It’s quiet uptown.”

- “There are moments that the words don’t reach. There is suffering too terrible to name. You hold your child as tight as you can and push away the unimaginable. The moments when you’re in so deep it feels easier to just swim down.”

- “There are moments that the words don’t reach. There is a grace too powerful to name. We push away what we can never understand. We push away the unimaginable.”

- “Can you imagine?”

- Act 2: 19. The Election of 1800

- honorable mention: “And they say I’m a Francophile: at least they know I know where France is!”

- “You used to work on the same staff” — “Whaaaat.”

- “Honestly, it’s kind of draining.” — “Burr...” — “Sir!” — “Is there anything you wouldn’t do?” — “No. I’m chasing what I want. And you know what?” — “What?” — “I learned that from you.” / this moment made the blow that he voted for Jefferson like a damn hole in my chest and i actually really felt for Burr. i get Hammy’s reluctance, i think if anything he was hoping voting for Jefferson would give Burr the chance to have experience as VP and then the next election he might vote for him then depending

- Act 2: 20. Your Obedient Servant

- A. Burr

- A. Ham

- “I just need to write something down.” / really resonated as one of the last things they showed him doing before going off to the duel, his life really was writing and that was the perfect way to say that in a very subtle sort of way. i really appreciate it artistically, whether it was intentionally so or not.

- Act 2: 22. The World Was Wide Enough

- okay but first of all i would like to comment on the fact that Ariana DeBose PLAYS THE GODDAMN BULLET, I JUST

- THE FACT THAT THE BULLET HAS A PART

- “This man will not make an orphan of my daughter.” / this made me really sympathize with Burr, as well as when he tries to go towards Hamilton (at least in the play but I sincerely hope that was historically accurate) / but also that fact that Theodosia Burr was lost at sea at 29 makes me sad because Hamilton’s life was taken to give her one and then she just up and disappears in a freak accident

- Act 2: 23. Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story

- the orphanage got to me

- i loved that he (LMM) didn’t end it with himself or anything

- he let Phillipa Soo tear my heart out

- it killed me but i died quite happily

- and really what more could you ask for.

#okay so #i know thw subheaders are probably grossly uneven #but like #i had to space manually #and this already took a lot of time to do #so i couldn’t give two fucks #lin manuel miranda #hamilton #hamilton film #daveed diggs #jonathan groff #anthony ramos #christopher jackson #jasmine cephas jones #leslie odom jr #leslie odom junior #ariana debose #jon rua #hamilfilm #shit i lost steam to tag cast members #you know and if you don’t look it up so you do #that’s how you learn shit like that the bullet had its own fucking role #the orphanage part also hurt because i was disowned by my father and then disowned by my mother (again) and then my father just decided he #wanted back in on my life #my shit family life has cast me out of my family #i feel like an orphan except i can’t be adopted #even though i want more than anything to have parents or parental figures #sadly my dad just isn’t #he kind of ruined that for me when he screamed me into a panic attack that almost killed me and then left the front door open to tell me to #get out

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devilbrakers · 4 years

Note

May I get the get love headcannons of Valen and/Or Helena? Sincerely, a humble servant 🙌

Yes ofc ❤️❤️ I'll put it under a read more later cuz I'm on mobile

Valen:

When they discover they’re got a crush: From the outside, it's hard to tell the difference from her romantic and platonic feelings, getting rid of the physical attraction from the former. But she can tell, though it's hard for her to explain. While she'd do just about anything for her friends, when she has romantic feelings she tends to take that a step further.

How they confess/hint: She tries not to but usually just ends up outright admitting it on accident. She can never keep it secret for long.

Big gestures of love: While she loves love, she's not particularly fond of these nor does she think she's any good at them. She prefers smaller gestures. Though, she is one for theatrics at times, especially after a tough battle so sometimes she's dramatic in her physical affection with Kaidan.

Little gestures of love: Making little trinkets and potions for Kai, packing his bag for him so he can sleep a little longer, infodumping to him about magic or alchemy, and giving him books to read.

How to win their heart: It's not particularly difficult to be honest. Being kind, earnest, and brave will usually do it.

How to break their heart: Being mean to her and others, being unfaithful, giving her the cold shoulder, and not getting along with her family.

Tiny little turn-ons: A nice smile (Kai's lmao), compassion, intelligence, and listening to her infodump.

Big turn-ons: Size differences djjddn, Kaidan in general, dominance or just being able to turn her brain off, and muscles.

Things that make their heart flutter: Kindness, laughter, gift-giving, hand-holding, and again, Kaidan in general.

Their type: Physically, she doesn't really have one for either gender, especially women. Though she is a bit more drawn to men who are taller than her. Personality wise, as I'm sure you can guess, she likes kind, compassionate people! She doesn't ask for a lot but she doesn't settle for the bare minimum.

Ideal date: She loves star-gazing with Kai in the Rift.

Past relationships: Only one serious one she was 18-19 with a Breton woman named Elara. It was very unhealthy and it took Lazarus pointing it out for a year straight for Valen to come to her senses.

How they might affect current relationships: Valen thinks it's why she has a habit of hiding any negative feelings she has but she's trying to work through it.

‘Goals’ in a relationship (marriage, kids, a house, etc): All of the above! And she gets it. They get married soon after Alduin dies and have a biological daughter named Ciri about 2 years after Alduin and Miraak are killed. They settle down a bit after that and Valen opens a clinic. They adopt Sofie and Alesan a couple years later (let's pretend they're still there and 10 years old lmao).

Any other love headcanons: Her primary love languages are acts of service and gift-giving.

Helena:

When they discover they’re got a crush: She's not fond of the feeling, at least she wasn't until she found her current situation. It's been a very long time since she's romanticized the feeling of butterflies in her stomach or being a loss for words due to someone's beauty. Now, it starts more as a physical attraction that morphs into an emotional one as she connects with someone, or at least in the best way someone like her can.

How they confess/hint: It depends. With women, she's sly. She'll flirt and make innuendos all day, anything to make them blush or better yet, throw it right back at her. With men, she finds it more difficult. She did especially so with Lucien. Luckily for her, he made the first move. She's more apt to get flustered when they flirt with her, though she'll deny vehemently. It's rare that she ever says her feelings outright, with either of her lovers.

Big gestures of love: As much as she adores Felria and Lucien, she'd rather be caught dead than doing a grand gesture of love for them in front of anyone in the Sanctuary. Discretion is difficult for these three. Though, on occasion she'll adjust the lighting in their shared room, leaving a trail of black rose petals leading to the large bed placed in the center of the room. I'm sure you can guess where that leads.

Little gestures of love: Protecting them in fights since she is much stronger, letting one of them kill the mark if they're on a mission together, etc. She's more apt to let her love show when they're out together.

How to win their heart: Well, if you have any moral decency, you're out. She generally likes cold, sadistic people with a charismatic charm to them. Though there have been a few exceptions to that, such as Martin Septim but their relationship wasn't romantic.

How to break their heart: Betray her trust in any form, be unfaithful to her, showing too much softness for people, and betraying the Brotherhood.

Tiny little turn-ons: When Fel or Lucien are being condescending towards someone and watching people beg.

Big turn-ons: Murder, violence in general really, hands, drinking blood with Fel and Lucien, and submissiveness.

Things that make their heart flutter: When Felria or Lucien do literally anything for her tbh, not that she'd ever admit that.

Their type: Physically, she doesn't really have one. She appreciates all types of people in that department. Though personality wise, like I said she likes cold, sadistic people who are also charismatic. Just assholes who can sweet talk to be general, I guess.

Ideal date: A mission with Felria and Lucien where they're assigned a party of nobles that they end up bleeding dry for a meal.

Past relationships: Nothing serious, a few flings here and there but she never really allowed herself to get attached to anyone in that way.

How they might affect current relationships: She's inexperienced but she's been with Fel and Lucien for 200 years now so I don't think it's much of an issue anymore.

‘Goals’ in a relationship (marriage, kids, a house, etc): She's personally happy as is now. She has no desire for children or marriage, though she's not wholly opposed to the latter.

Any other love headcanons: When she was human in the second era, she was much softer in the aspect of romance. Similar to Valen in a lot of ways.

#ask #my ocs #valen #helena #skyrim #thank you!!

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razberryyum · 5 years

Photo

The Untamed and The Living Dead movie Thoughts

SPOILERS AHEAD!

If you haven’t watched the movie, it’s best not to proceed cuz you will be spoiled.

OR, if you have already watched the movie and love it completely, AND you stan Yu Bin and will not put up with any criticism about his performance, it’s also best not to proceed cuz you’ll most likely be annoyed/upset with me. Let’s just agree to disagree right now and move on with our separate happy lives.

Overall Rating for The Living Dead: 3 Lil Apples out of 10

Yeah, I know that’s pretty harsh…I waffled between 3, 4 and 5, but I had to settle on a 3 in the end because I don’t think I’ll ever rewatch this movie and there were just so many problems I had with it, that I realized I can’t say I liked the movie much at all.

Before I go on, let me first address the big white elephant in the room: no, WangXian does NOT cameo in The Living Dead nor are they even mentioned in any capacity that would assure us they are still together and happy in the movie’s timeline. At one point Wen Ning does mention them in the same sentence, but only in relationship to himself (that they saved him) and the past. For those of us desperate for confirmation of WangXian happily ever afterness in the world of CQL (“us” meaning me only most likely), we get no assurance whatsover. This is especially disappointing since the movie apparently take place years later after the events of The Untamed so it’s really sad that we have no idea if they are together. Of course in the world of the novel, we know they are absolutely together, happily married, everydaying everyday, but it would’ve been nice if we were given some tiny morsel of comfort for WangXian of The Untamed.

Not only does Lan Zhan not make an appearance, he’s only mentioned by Wen Ning once, as I indicated above. As for Wei Ying, he’s mentioned a few times and he kiiiiinda makes a cameo…but honestly, I wish they didn’t even attempt that cameo cuz it was so bad. It’s basically the backview of some extra dressed as Wei Ying and dubbed over by someone else that’s not Lu Zhixing-laoshi. Or if it is, the dub was so bad that it didn’t even sound like him anymore.

That’s actually one of my main problems with the movie: the dubbing or sound mixing just sucked. Every time there was dialogue it sounded very obviously that it was on a different track. I didn’t even feel like the characters were saying the words because their voices sounded detached from them. Whereas in The Untamed, I sometimes would completely forget that with the exception of Nie Huaisang, everyone’s line reads were performed by voice actor because the voices were blended so well within the scenes. I don’t know the technical terms of all this dubbing stuff so hopefully I’m making some sense.

Another big problem was the CGI. Holy crap was it bad. It was so bad at no point was I able to immerse myself into the action scenes…I didn’t feel anyone was in danger because they were being attacked by a bunch of obvious and bad CGI. One of the worse scenes that they showed THREE times was when the sister (Xiao Qing) being burned up in CGI flames. First of all her acting was horrendous (why was she covering her ears while she’s being burned alive??) and then the fake fire just made me groan out loud. I didn’t even want to look it was so embarrassingly bad.

I’m trying to figure out when they shot this movie…in order for them to be able to release the movie so soon after the show, the filming had to overlap with The Untamed’s filming, right? So I guess budget was still tight, probably even tighter than the main show, since CQL probably didn’t start actually seeing the money it made from ads, etc until towards the end. Either way, it feels like they didn’t put much money into this movie, especially not the effects. And if I’m going to be honest, I think they probably just had their second…nay…probably third unit direct it. Or at least, they had their third unit decide on some of the casting cuz some of the performances were…OOF. One thing I really appreciated about The Untamed is that even with most of the background actors, there was hardly a glaringly bad performance. I’ve said before the worse really was the actor who played Wen Ruohan, which is a shame cuz he’s more than an extra, but overall all the performances by the supporting characters ranged from decent to strong with hardly a weak link. Here, in this movie, I would say most of the performances from the new cast members were very mediocre. In fact, the only truly consistently good performances from beginning to end was Zheng Fanxing (Sizhui) and that cute little girl in the beginning:

I was kind of sad when she got killed off cuz she was adorable and definitely a MUCH better actor that the dude who played her older brother…at no point was I remotely convinced he was scared so on the other hand I was happy he died. But I thought she was going to burn to death or something because it didn’t seem like a good idea to have her hide in a wooden cupboard with a lite stove…that was so stupid and weird. Btw, what the hell was with that cat screeching sound effect?? Sounded like someone was throwing a cat, but like WHY?

As for the three new players introduced for this movie—Gao Han as Xiao Yi, Wang Yifei as Xiao Qing and He Longlong as Zhou Zishu—I’ve never seen their work before, and nothing about their performances in this movie makes me interested in what they will do in the future. To be fair, Gao Han tried…you can totally tell he was trying REALLY hard in some of his scenes, but for the most part, he either overacted or strangely enough, underacted. He was just really inconsistent. I know Zhou Zishu was supposed to be a red herring so the fact that he started out looking sketchy AF was supposed to be a ruse since our narrator was entirely untrustworthy, but even in the context of that false narration, he was really bad. As for the sister played by Wang Yifei…just look at her performance as she’s being burned up again.

By the way, I’m gonna say this now: if Wei Ying and Lan Zhan don’t even get to share a fucking real hug between them throughout the entirety of The Untamed, then I don’t think some generally unimportant-in-the-greater-scheme-of-things couple should be allowed to freaking KISS in anything related to the world of CQL.

I understand it’s all about the censorship, etc etc, but if any hetero couple deserved to share an onscreen kiss, it would’ve been Shijie and Jin Zixuan, and since even they were deprived of that, then these two nobodies should not have been granted this privilege. Seriously, fuck whoever decided to stick that moment in the movie. That’s just fucking unfair and really annoyed me. There better not be any more of that kind of nonsense in the Nie brothers‘ movie.

The last I’ll say about performances is that sadly, I felt as if there was something off about Yu Bin’s. I totally understand that this is a different Wen Ning than the one we saw in the show—he’s older, more mature, since God knows how many years have passed already—so I don’t mind that he’s more serious. But at the same time, he was just so uneven that I couldn’t get behind his performance at all. He was always one key off, if that makes any sense, so it almost felt like someone else was playing Wen Ning entirely, someone who is completely unfamiliar with that character. And his work in the…whatever fuck that place was…Yin Metal purgatory?? (and for those who are familiar with Guardian, that place was giving me bad flashbacks to Dixing)…was kind of cringey overall.

I wanted to love seeing Wen Ning be a badass wise uncle, so I actually feel really sad that I couldn’t enjoy his performance in general. However, what I absolutely did enjoy was seeing uncle and nephew bonding and working together…

…just wish those moments weren’t marred by all that bad CGI.

Wen Ning’s new look gave me pause though: not that I didn’t appreciate the whole metal look, but I kind of couldn’t figure out why Wen Ning added the chains back to his ensemble when he got rid of them back in The Untamed already.

I mean, if the black veins on his neck don’t attract attention, walking around wearing heavy, clangy chains sure would probably alarm people as well, I think.

Last thing on Wen Ning: again, not that I didn’t appreciate his newfound ability to hulk out, but yikes, that whole effect was ruined by yet again bad CGI AND a really goofy score. Sounded like something they “borrowed” from Naruto.

Except for that one piece of music, I did like the score for the rest of the movie, especially in the opening credits since it definitely evoked a sense of creepiness. The images in the credits were good too. I can easily imagine that being the OP creds to a horror anthology.

As for the story, I was fine with it. I liked that they related the family to Nightless City because apparently they are the ones who helped make Nightless City nightless? Here I thought it was the surrounding lava but I guess there were lanterns lighting the place up that I just somehow missed completely. I liked the plot twist with Xiao Yi and his “sister”…although I did guess there was some incesty thing going on in the beginning…just didn’t think I would be right and wrong at the same time. I thought they would relate their relationship back to Wen Ning and Wen Qing somehow, considering the sisters shared the same name…this was before the “incest” part was confirmed of course…but they never really did so having Wen Qing share the same name as Xiao Qing felt like an oddity in the end. It’s also odd how they used the same phonetically sounding last name of “Xiao” since of course I immediately thought of Xiao Zhan (different characters). Like, couldn’t they come up with completely different names? Overall, the plot wasn’t bad, as mysteries go, at first I couldn’t figure out why the Yin Metal all of a sudden had all these new powers and why the metal wielder, Zhou Zishu, would become a ghost puppet himself, but with the plot twist, all of that was explained so I was fine with it. The last shot of “Xiao Yi” in the Yin Metal purgatory made me guffaw; yeah, that didn’t look suggestive AT ALL.

The Living Dead actually makes me look forward even more to the next movie, The Fatal Journey. I’m hoping that since it’s potentially about the Nie brother’s past and Jin Guangyao, that perhaps there will be less need for CGI as it will focus more on just dialogue and story-telling. Not to mention, again, apologies to Yu Bin fans, but those three actors are generally stronger performers, so with them at the helm, I’m expecting/hoping for greater things.

Since I’ve been mostly negative, I wanted to leave on at least one positive note: Sizhui is still an adorable puppy. His dads, wherever they are, whatever they’re doing during the movie, must be so proud of him.

#The Untamed #陈情令 #CQL #The Living Dead movie #Wen Ning #Lan Sizhui #Mo Dao Zu Shi #魔道祖师 #WangXian

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dachi-chan25 · 4 years

Text

I finished my tbr but I didn't liked a lot of the books, I am so disappointed, I read 2 extra graphic novels to at least get something I did like so yeah.

1-Cinco Horas Con Mario - Miguel Delibes

🌟🌟

Se que es un clásico de la literatura española pero es que la mujer es insufrible de verdad que es una basura de personaje totalmente despreciable y prejuiciosa el concepto del libro me atrajo muchísimo pero de verdad que yo no puedo con el monólogo interno de esta mujer.

2.- The Young Elites - Marie Lu

🌟🌟

I think I know what they were going for with Adelina, Marie Lu was going for an anti hero or a fallen hero but Adelina lacked so much depth for that to be the case, sadly the worldbuilding wasn't great either, again the premise seemed intriguing to me but I didn't like the characters or the plot and seeing as this is very character driven I couldn't enjoy it nor am I inclined to read the next books.

3.- A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole

🌟🌟

I was so disappointed, I became intrested in this after reading about the author and how this book came to be published. But I am sorry to say I just couldn't connect with any of the characters or the humor so yeah it wasn't an enjoyable read for me at all.

4.-Athena's Champion - David Hair/Cath Mayo

🌟🌟🌟

It was ok, I felt pretty luckwarm toward this, which is surprising as I loved the Moontide Quartet by David Hair, and this "prequel" to the Illiad certainly sounded like something I would enjoy but it felt so juvenile and again the characters annoyed me a lot, idk maybe I wasn't in the right mood for it.

5.-Four Dead queens - Astrid Scholtte

🌟🌟

The worldbuilding made no sense to me. It was predictable and the villian was a caricature, the romance was bland and the relationship I did care about came to nothing because the title itself spoils the queens die, like I just don't get how a system that doesn't work for anyone literally even the rulers disliked the Queenly Law is still going on.

6.-Kingsbane (Empirium #2)- Claire Legrand

🌟🌟

Whyyyyyy??? I really liked the first book, and unpopular opinion but I liked both queens, but this book was so wierd, Rielle felt like a whole new character like I was curious as to how she came to be the Blood Queen and it was such a disappointment I hoped for more, and Elena didn't fare much better, I just - I will not continue the series I just didn't like this book at all and i don't see how it will recover from the point it left us.

7.-The Kingdom of Cooper (Daevad Trilogy #2) - S.A Chakraborty

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Finally some good food!!!! So by this point I pretty much thought I was brain dead and didn't like reading anymore but this book returned my faith. Why hadn't I read this??? Nahri goes through so much in this book and I really love how much Ali and she complement each other, how idelistic and caring they both are, like I really want them together not only romantically (I mean I know they in laws but let's be honest Muntadhir would rather be married to Nahri's brother, soooo we can work it out) Dara fucked up but I did feel for him, like I don't support what he is doing but the politics of it were complicated, and well Daevad is a mess rn so yeah I am dying to see what happens next.

8.-Candide - Voltaire

🌟🌟🌟

It was pretty funny and there is a lot of satire going on, I always appreciate that.

9.- La Senda del mexica - Joaquin Guerrero Casasola

🌟🌟🌟

Me encanto el concepto, una novela negra ubicada en Tenochtitlan es algo que de verdad me intrigaba, sobre todo porque utilizan el concepto de detective viejo que ya duda de sus habilidades, Opochtli no es un personaje que me agradara en particular pero lo disfrute como protagonista y la historia aunque bastante sencilla fue muy original y descriptiva, realmente me pude imaginar todos los sabores y colores que describía Opochtli y eso lo aprecio mucho.

10.- King Lear - William Shakespeare

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

This is a re-read for me, this play is one of my favorites and I enjoy a lot to read it every now and then.

11.- Bury what we cannot take - Kristen Chen

🌟🌟🌟

This book is about a family that seeks to flee China during the Mao regimen to go to Hong Kong where the father lives with his mistress, the mother is unable to get permission for all of them leaves San San her young daughter then faces horrors as she tries to catch up with her family as her brother who was very loyal to the party tries to go back. I thought it was a great read really moving, but the end felt too open for me I wanted more I wanted to go deeper and Stronger w some themes so it left me dissatisfied.

12.- The Priory of the orange tree - Samantha Shannon

🌟🌟🌟🌟

I loved it!!!! The mythology surrounding the dragons and wyrms was great, the different realms w their different systems. The religion, in Virtudom especially where the ruler is believed to be a descendant from the Saint (and that plot twist), the characters and how well developed they were. Sabran and Ead! !!!! Like I was hoping they would be the saphicc romance everyone raved about cuz I loved their interactions, like I lost hope for a second there but then I was so happy when it came to happen, as a matter of fact the only reason why I didn't give this 5 stars is cuz I would have loved to have a prologue 10 years in the future to see them fulfill their promise.

13.- Verify - Joelle Charbonneau

🌟🌟

It might be good to introduce dystopic to a young audience, like this takes from many classic dystopias that gives a nice fundation if you never read one before, but as someone who enjoys dystopias a lot for me this was pretty boring and unoriginal, I know it was supposed to be a retelling of Fahrenheith 451 but I didn't see ir that way, like we could argue Paper is deemed as illegal and stuff but tbh it wasn't great, the main character was very unappealing to me, so not reading the next one.

14.-Prosper's demon - K.J Parker

🌟🌟🌟🌟

I really loved this one!!! Very short but succeeds in establishing the world and the characters, it was so good, full of morally grey characters, the ending left me shook like it really made me believe one thing and then boom!!!

15.-The Book of Lost Saints - José Daniel Older

🌟🌟🌟🌟

So this book is about a spirit taking possesion of her nephew's dreams so he will investigate what happened to her, how she died as she doesn't even remember her name, her memories are super vague. We unravel the story of a Cuban family in the middle of the revolution and institution of the communist régimen, how many people were prosecuted for fighting against Castro, among them Isabel and her sister Marisol. We get another amazing plot twist (for real it made me cry) intergenerational trauma and the search of identity as an immigrant pretty great stuff.

16.- Snow Glass Apples - Neil Gaiman

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

I loved it!!!! Dark retellings are some of my favorite things, and I have always liked Vampire!Snow White, this is just so creepy and good.

17. - Laura Dean Keeps breaking up with me - Mariko Tamaki

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Lots of queer representation and drama!!!! For real I just wanted to hug Freddie and tell her Laura wasn't shit. So we get the Importance of friendship and a good support system how a relationship can be toxic even if there is love (codependence isn't fun kids) and lots of relevant topics.

Gosh i really wish next month goes better, I will do another unhaul.

#august 2020 wrap up #booklr #wrap up #dachi reads stuff #dachi rambles

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polygamyff · 4 years

Text

43.

It’s weird to be moving my things to a home I have never visited; I am adamant in not seeing it until I am with Robyn and Reign so we can do it together. I am just emptying my suite at the top of my hotel “feeling emotional?” turning around seeing Shawn “it’s weird, I don’t know. I feel emotional, I don’t know why though” dapping Shawn “it’s because a lot has happened in this suite Maurice, this has been your home for years. Like you hid from Noami here, you have had so much happen here, happiness, tears. You spent your time here, so you’re finally moving huh?” nodding my head “yeah, it’s scary you know. I am finally going to be a family man, family home. Robyn is coming today so yeah, I thought I would get the movers to move my stuff, it’s not much but still. It’s my stuff, and I’m emotional” I chuckled, Shawn patted my back “it’s new beginnings for you, I am happy for you. Robyn moving to the city that never sleeps, she can really watch you now” nodding my head “Ally, I want you to get someone to deep clean this place, renovate it and we can start using this suite for customers ok? You now what to do” Ally waved me off as she rushed off, she is of course doing everything. She is making sure my stuff is moved “she has been to the home, she said she was taken back by it, she said it’s beautiful. I refuse to see it until I am with Robyn, so I let Ally deal with it, so how you been? Not spoke to you for a while” I am still trying to take it all in, where I spent my depressive drugged up days, I vaguely remember when Noami came storming in this suite, I don’t know how. And I just snorted a line, she was so angry. Like I know I said to her bye, I knew I was going to be out of it, and I had other women here, she was so angry “Maurice!” Shawn clicked his fingers at me “huh” looking at me “sorry, what did you say?” here I am daydreaming “I am going to tell your sister about my past” raising an eyebrow “you sure about that? Can’t believe it’s a thing still” I was hoping it would have ended “it is Maurice, we get on just well. I like Nalah a lot Maurice” I still don’t know how to feel about it “if it’s true then she will come back to you, if not then you know. Look at me, I came out of it being a married man. Love” pointing at him “this is why I am nervous, now I know how you felt when you didn’t want to tell Robyn about Noami, you don’t want to lose her” nodding my head as I walked off slowly “well, she knows where I am if she needs me, I rather you tell her. Then maybe I can accept this situation a little more” Shawn nodded his head.

This place is empty now, I had a few things here, not many. The movers came from Texas, to here and now to the home which Ally will be there, and they came here for what, about eight boxes. Looking around the suite “new beginnings bro” Shawn patted my shoulder; my dad gave me this suite to live when I turned twenty. It was a place I ran too, cried at actually “new beginnings” I said closing the door “it’s bad vibes anyways, I know. I have been there with you” rubbing my chin as I walked the lobby “I am happy, like I will have my daughter here. I can be a real ass dad instead of you know, seeing her now and then and I think Robyn and I will work so much better. She wants a family home and I also want a family. She hated that I never really moved in the Cali home, well why would I? That was never my base, here is better and I am so happy she did this. I didn’t want to approach the situation, you know how it is with women” fixing my suite jacket button “I do, but you hear that? About Malik? Well” Shawn pressed the elevator button “so Noami’ uncle beat Malik’ ass and then Naomi left him. This was around when the divorce happened and got signed. Malik has no home, and Nalah said your dad has him in the hotel at New Orleans because your mom begged him. Malik is in a state” stepping in the elevator “see, when it’s my hotel. He will be on the streets; I can never forgive him” it’s up to my dad what he wants to do with him for now.

Stepping off of the elevator “well I thought I would tell you, me and Jay are going into business” me and Shawn stopped in the middle of the reception area “no way!?” Shawn spat “Mr Davenport, he is here Kellen” looking behind me, I know this nigga ain’t here, and Tiffany “Maurice, cousin” that child is in my hotel “Kellen” I mumbled, I am not impressed. He is holding that child like that child means anything, Tiffany didn’t bother to walk to me, but Kellen did with that child “I was in New York so I thought Royal can meet his uncle” staring at Kellen’ face “his what?” I said, Kellen laughed “come on now, I am a changed man. I don’t want this anymore; this is the future. This is Uncle Maurice, Royal” taking in a deep breath “why did you name him Royal?” I need to know this “because in my eyes he is Royal, and I want him to know his family” Kellen said “where is Reign? We did grow up together” stuffing my hands in my pockets “she is coming soon, you know Robyn is moving here” looking down at the child “luckily he has your genes” Kellen laughed “I am so happy to have a son” looking up from the child “likewise but with having a daughter, if you are staying here. No funny business ok?” Kellen nodded his head “I paid” he said “good, nice seeing you. I have business” I rather not fuck with him, keep him at a distance.

Walking off with Shawn “I don’t trust him, he has an agenda” I said, making my way outside “his son is cute, got that light skinned genes too. The Davenport genes” looking over at Shawn “do I care?” we stopped outside the hotel “I am just saying” Shawn nudged me “I would like a son though, but having a daughter is just the best. She gives me a lot of love and I wouldn’t ever love her any less, but I would like a son, a boy of mine. He will be even cuter than Royal, dumb ass name to be honest” Shawn chuckled “but he is cute” I added, I don’t want to sound too bitter “so you want more kids then?” Shawn asked “I do, I am just scared but Robyn took that fear away from me when she said what she said about helping me, helping us and there is a way around it. So I am happy now” Shawn smiled at me “good on you” seeing a SUV pull up in front of me “this is my next meet, but thanks for coming to see me and if my sister does need me, you know where I am ok?” dapping Shawn “see what happens” he walked off “Maurice Davenport!” Rob said “Robert” shaking his hand “you got my goods?” he chuckled “I do, in this” he has a large briefcase with him “well, come on. Let’s go in” I gestured for him to go in first.

Sitting across from him in my meeting room “when I got the call from your assistant, I was thinking. Is this really Maurice Davenport? I was so confused, but then the money came in straight away and look at this, the man himself. I am rather shocked to meet you, a young black man that is a billionaire, I do meet rich men but this. I am so hype right now” this guy is funny “well I got good reviews from your business, and I believe you have got what I want?” he is nervous, I don’t know why either “unless you don’t?” he unlocked his case “no, I have. I just hope you like it. Would you like to see Reign-Texas Davenport watch first?” I smiled, I smiled at him saying her full name “go on” I said, I don’t really think I am a big deal but clearly I am according to this guy. I just wanted him to make Reign and Robyn some Rolex’s for them, a little gift for them “you said you wanted to keep it same, so this is Reign’ Diamond encrusted, pink face Rolex” taking the watch from Rob “aww man, oh my god. This is so cute, like I know this will be perfect for her, a little loose but she will grow into it, aww my baby girl is going to look so good, yeah” looking around the watch “I like it, it’s perfect” nodding my head staring in awe, I just love it “this is Robyn’ watch, as you requested, the same. To every detail” he held it out to me in the box “perfect, both of my ladies got the same. So what it is, they are moving to me. I just wanted to give them both a moving gift, so this is perfect. Thank you” I am very happy with this gift.

Robyn has just said she has landed in New York, I am so happy and excited right now, I couldn’t meet them at the airport because I need to finish off a few things here because I’m off for a few days to help settle in Robyn “Maurice” my office door opened “yes Ally?” looking up at the door “Kellen is here, he would like to speak to you” rolling my eyes “I suppose, just let him in” I have no choice, clearly he has some issue that he has got. Why does he want to speak to me “cuz” Kellen walked in “welcome to my office, what is up? You may take a seat” I pointed across my desk “thank you” it’s such a shame he did what he did, now he’s sniffing around me “what is it I can do for you Kellen?” he is laughing, he should laugh because he is a joke “my dad said you’re going to take over the company by next month, and that your dad said you’re not going to put up with shit. Meaning you won’t support us like that, I have a family and a home to run” taking in a deep breath “Tiffany not working? Or she wanting you to provide for her? Huh?” Kellen sighed out “I am stuck with her, I fucked up and I am with her now what do you want me to do, it’s her. She sells stories about us; I can’t stop her. Ask Robyn, we always been toxic, but I made a mistake with her and she said she wants a home like you got here, I am not spending sixty-seven fucking million! I just need you to tell me what I can do so I can still get money” raising an eyebrow, I laughed and it’s funny to me “leave her, then I can accept you’re being true to your word. I mean you don’t want her right? You divorce her, make sure you prove she cheated on you too. She can’t touch anything because this is all mines so there is that. You leave her, then I will help you and your son out” Kellen stared at me like I was joking “other then that, now you told me she speaks shit about me, I don’t want to know. Leave her, then come to me. Money or no money, your choice” I smirked “cuz” I am not being evil but honestly, fuck Tiffany “but will you have my back? My dad will kill me!?” nodding my head “I got you, I can put that on my daughter. You want to prosper; she needs to go. I will be running a close circle, either you’re in or out” this guy does not love Tiffany, he hates her a lot “my son?” why is he asking me “naming it Royal, should have been a crime!” I spat “I didn’t pick it, his full name is Royal Texas Davenport, Tiffany is deluded, I wanted his name to be Kellen junior!” shaking my head in disbelief “wow! Well you know what to do, come back when you can” that fucking bitch.

#Chrianna #Chranna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction

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benhardyisdaddy · 5 years

Text

Royal Protection - Part 12

MASTERLIST

(omg hello okay so i actually BAWLED at this part cuz ik how she feels, i hope u like it xoxoxox)

Word Count: 2,365

“ETA?”

“We’ll be landing in approximately thirty minutes. How’s she doing?”

“She’s still out, but she’s fine. From my diagnosis, I think it was stress induced. A lot just happened to her and her body’s trying to cope with it. Being asleep for this long is normal in these cases. She’ll be perfectly fine.”

“Thank you Dr. Smith. For everything.”

You were half asleep when you began to hear voices all around you. You flutter your eyes open and blink a few times, them blurry from your long sleep. You slowly move around and blink a few more times, finally able to focus. You turn your head and realize you’re lying down on a cot in your private jet. The engines were running and you could feel the slight turbulence. Your eyelids threaten to keep closing out of exhaustion, but you ignore them. You slowly lift yourself up with your forearms and spot people at the front of the jet and talking. You’re seeing double, but it quickly passes. You’re watching them for a moment until one of them turns their head in your direction.

“Y/n?”

It’s Ben. His face has a mixture of shock and relief. Everyone turns their heads when they hear him whisper your name. He rushes over to you and drops to his knees. He wraps his arms around you gently and pulls you close to him. You nuzzle your face in his neck and feel tears roll down your face.

“What happened?” you whisper, sniffling a bit.

Ben pulls away and quickly cups your face with his hands. He smiles with glossy eyes, threatening to spill at any moment.

“You fainted, love.” he explains. “Dr. Smith said it was because of all of the stress you've been under. You’re okay though. You’re okay.”

“What’s happening now?” you ask, looking around the jet.

“We’re almost home, princess.” he tells you. “We can go back home now. You can go back home.”

You smile to him and suddenly remember the trauma he had suffered right beside you.

“Your head!” you whisper-shout. “How are you?”

Ben smiles and nods, turning around to show you. There was a large gash, now sewed up with stitches. It was red and angry and made you wince at the sight of it.

“It feels fine. I promise. I’m just worried about you, okay? Do you need anything? A drink? Food? More blankets?” he asks, looking around fast to find anything.

You watch him and smile, admiring how selfless he is towards you. It warms your heart.

“No,” you start, pulling him back around to face you. “Just you.”

Ben’s half worried expression softens and he smiles, taking in your answer with every fiber in his body. He slowly nods and stands up, slipping his shoes off. You scoot yourself over and make space for him. You didn’t care if people were staring as he slides under the covers with you. You rest your head on his chest as he slings his arm around you and pulls you even closer to him. You close your eyes and enjoy the moment.

You can hear his heart beating and smile at the sound of it. It made you happy that he was okay and alive. It made you happy that he was there for you, no matter what. So this is what happiness feels like, you think to yourself. You move your head slowly and look up at Ben. He has his other arm rested behind his head as his eyes are closed. You can tell he was exhausted too. You know for a fact that he’s been awake the whole time since you’ve been asleep.

“Thank you.” you whisper quietly to him.

He opens his eyes and looks down at you, a smile playing on his lips.

“Thank you for not giving up on me when so many others would have.”

“Please,” he starts, closing his eyes. “Please don’t thank me. I’m the one who should’ve been watching you better. Protecting you, not failing my job. That wouldn’t have happened if it hadn’t been for me.”

Your heart drops as he speaks. You sit up fast and face him, frowning hard.

“Don’t ever say that!” you tell him. “None of that was your fault. I should have never texted Claire or opened the door. That was on me, not you. Okay?” you ask.

Ben takes in a deep breath and nods his head. You lay back down and wrap your arms around him. Ben might have agreed with you, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t a lie.

***

“Welcome home, princess.”

That’s exactly where you were. Home. It’s felt like years since you’ve been here. The familiar surroundings and faces made you so happy. Your security has been amped up tremendously, causing your arrival to the airport to be the only flight coming in today. Men dressed in all black gathered around you and Ben as you both walked from the plane and inside. They had dark sunglasses on as they watched every single person you walked by. Your luggage had already been grabbed from the plane and placed inside your vehicle. You held Ben’s hand the whole time, nervous about everything.

“It’s going to be okay.” he whispers in your ear when you get inside the car.

You turn to look at him and you were a shaking mess. You take in a deep, slow breath and nod. You face forward and close your eyes, trying to calm yourself down. Ben held your hand and slowly drew tiny circles on it with his thumb. You feel your shoulders slightly relax and look to him, smiling.

The car ride to your castle felt like an eternity. The traffic was due to your arrival back home. People stood on the side of the roads waving your flag and cheering you on. News about what had happened spread fast in your country, causing an out storm of angry civilians trying to stand up for their princess. They were all so happy you were home and safe. Seeing their smiling faces as they waved at you and throw flowers, made you the happiest and luckiest person in the world. You finally can see that now, especially with Ben by your side.

You finally arrive home and stare out your window towards it. The last time you were here, you had said goodbye to everyone, even Gwil. He waved you off along with everyone else. One person who you never thought would betray you, had. You’ve hyped yourself up with the thought of who else would do the same thing to you? Who could you trust? It was a constant fear you were now suffering with.

“My baby!” cries out your mother as you walk in with your security.

Ben stands back as you walk forward and are embraced in her arms. She sobs out as she holds you close and kisses your head. You cry with her as your father walks up. He’s quiet, but tears are evident in his eyes. He just stares at you with a shocked expression, taking in that his little girl was actually okay and back with him. He’s almost speechless, not knowing the right words to say.

“Hi, daddy.” you whisper to him, smiling.

He smiles back and strides up to you, engulfing you into a hug. He cries out once and holds you close to him.

“I thought I had lost you.” he whispers.

“I would never leave you.” you whisper back.

You both pull away - him cupping your face and wiping away a few of your tears.

“I’m just so happy you’re home, my love. We’ve missed you so much.”

“And I’ve missed you, daddy.”

He grins and pulls you in once more for a hug. Just as you were pulling back, you heard your name shouted.

“Y/n!”

You look behind your father and spot Lucy running towards you with Joe right behind her. You gasp and run to them both. Lucy hugs you and squeezes you tightly.

“I’m so happy you’re okay! I missed you so much!”

“Me too, kiddo.” says Joe, sniffling.

You hug him as well and your heart is overflowing with love from everyone around you. Your true friends.

“Love?” your father asks you.

You turn around to him and watch as Ben in standing in front of them with a slight frown on his face. He looks to you and attempts to smile, but fails.

“Lucy and Joe will take you to your room. We need to speak to Benjamin alone, if we may.”

Your smile drops by the sound of your father’s voice - stern and almost disappointed.

“Daddy, Ben saved me.” you tell him. “If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t be here right now.”

Your father smiles gently and nods as Lucy wraps her arm around yours.

“I know, sweetie. We just need to talk. Lucy, if you will?”

Lucy nods and begins leading the way to your bedroom, followed by Joe. You’re almost out of the room when you turn your head and look back to Ben. He’s staring at you and smiles once more. You round the corner and eventually make it to your room. When you step inside, you grin and run to your bed and jump on it. Lucy and Joe laugh as they watch you.

“We had no idea about Gwil.” says Lucy. “Everyone here got questioned about him and I swear we never knew anything.”

“Honest.” says Joe. “I would’ve taken him out myself if I had known.” he hisses.

You smile and sit up.

“Believe me, I know. I had no idea either. It’s all still a shock to me-”

You freeze when you realize something that wasn’t there before. You narrow your eyes and look to Lucy fast.

“Luc?” you ask. “What’s on your finger?”

She looks down and her face brightens up.

“I wasn’t going to tell you yet. Let you get settled in and everything, but… Rami proposed to me! You were so right, y/n! I’m in love with him!”

Your face goes excited as you squeal and hug her.

“Oh my gosh! Lucy, that’s the greatest news I’ve heard in forever! I’m so happy for you! You have to get married in our chapel! Ben and I can help with everything!”

Lucy backs away and lifts a brow to you, Joe narrowing his eyes.

“Ben can help you?” she asks, wondering.

“Is there something you’re not telling us?” asks Joe.

Your face goes red and you look down at your hands, realizing what you had just said. You outed your relationship with Ben.

“I knew it!” yells Lucy. “You and Ben! You both-” she lowers her voice to a whisper. “Got together!”

You smile and fall back on the bed, pulling a pillow over your face.

“You and Ben?” asks Joe, still confused.

“Yes!” you squeal as you sit up. “I like him so much. I never knew I could like someone as much as I do. I didn’t think it would happen and well… It did.”

You can’t stop smiling and neither can they. You all sit there for what feels like forever as you share stories about Ben and Lucy does the same about Rami. Joe sits there as an older brother and shakes his head, hoping to forget this certain conversation altogether. You’re all laughing and gossiping when you decide to make your way back to the foyer. Lucy and Joe follow you as you look around for any signs of your parents or Ben. You’re coming closer to the foyer when you hear the front doors close loudly, telling you someone either entered or left. You round the corner and your parents are still stood there, but Ben’s nowhere to be seen.

“Daddy?” you ask, causing them to turn around fast. “Where’s Ben?”

Your father looks to your mother as she takes a step closer to you.

“We relieved him of his duties, my love.” she says softly.

Your heart falls as the words leave her lips. You take a step back and place your hand over your stomach, feeling a wave of nausea hit you.

“W - What do you mean?” you ask, your voice shaking a bit.

“Benjamin is…” she pauses and takes in a deep breath. “Benjamin is no longer your security. We’ve let him go.”

Tears pool in your eyes as you feel faint all of a sudden.

“You fired him?” you whisper.

Your parents notice how distressed you look as a confused expression fills their eyes.

“Well, yes, dear. He-” starts your mother.

“Where is he? Did he leave? Has he left?” you ask fast, running to the door.

“He’s just left outside, love. Y/n!” yells your mother as you ignore them and race to the doors.

You open them up fast, and run outside. You look around and spot a black car with it’s doors closing. You spot Ben inside. He looks distressed and sad with tears in his eyes. He’s look forward and not in your direction. You sob as you begin running towards him and down the stairs. The car begins pulling away as you scream out to him.

“Ben!”

He looks over to you and his face drops. He watches as your features are scrunched up as you try to get to him. You can’t catch your breath as you’re bawling and running fast.

“Ben! No! Don’t go! Please!” you scream loudly, causing your voice to go hoarse.

Ben’s eyes are wide as the car drives away and all he can do is sit there and watch you disappear from him with sadness all over you. He can’t comfort or protect you anymore, as badly as he wants.

“Don’t leave me! You promised!” you scream out. “Don’t leave me! Please!”

He just places his hand on the window and watches as you fall to your knees and hunch over, sobbing loudly. Your parents are watching from the doorway, confused beyond belief. Lucy rushes to you and falls to her knees as well, holding you close to her. Ben’s jaw is tensed as you become a small blur and then are gone.

He’s gone.

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