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iamanartichoke · 3 years

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I started typing this in the tags of this post, and it got too long, and then I was going to just reblog the post with this as an addition but that got too long too, and I've been meaning to make a post addressing free will vs. predestination since the premiere anyway, so - here we go. Spoilers, obviously.

Cut for length and spoilers. Please blacklist #loki tv series spoilers, #loki series spoilers, and #loki spoilers.

This is kinda rough and I'm not sure it actually makes any sense but I'm posting it anyway.

I realize that the post is a joke, obviously (and it is hilarious) but I started thinking about the implications and couldn't stop because it's honestly a goldmine of existential reflection and an inevitable crisis or three.

Let's look at a scenario.

Say you're late to work for reasons totally beyond your control: your neighbor stopped you to ask a question on your way out the door; you swung through the drive-thru for a quick coffee but the person in front of you is ordering a full continental breakfast ffs (this happened to me this morning); there was an explosion and then the Winter Soldier randomly dropped from the sky and landed on the hood of your car. Whatever. Shit happens.

So you're late, but on this particular day, your lateness somehow has consequences that lead to and create a nexus event and the next thing you know, you're being arrested, tried, convicted of time crimes and ultimately (a version of you is) erased from existence.

And this is if it's not even your fault you're late.

Now say that you're late and it is your fault. You took a new route on a whim and drove a little more slowly because you passed a particularly pretty meadow; you hit the brakes at a yellow light instead of speeding through bc you wanted the quick chance to check your email; you sat in your car for a few extra minutes in the parking lot, because maybe your job sucks and you really needed those extra minutes today to psyche yourself up into getting out of the car and going inside and clocking in.

These little choices are you exercising your free will. Because to me, free will is all or nothing - it doesn't just apply to the big decisions.

On the other hand, predestination means that regardless of the choices you make or if it's a big decision or not, everything you do is ultimately going to lead you to a set point or position or place (your destiny).

And I can kind of look at it like a GPS - that is, there are a number of "insignificant" choices you could make and they will still lead you to where you're predestined to go. Like how a GPS will reconfigure your route if you miss your exit on the highway. It doesn't matter if you took Route A or Route B, you're still going to end up at your destination.

But say sometimes the route does matter. Say that there are certain scenarios in which there's only one road (for example, 14 million losses vs 1 win) and you can only get on it by following a specific series of events and what determines the ultimate outcome is whether or not you're late to work that day.

If you decide to wait those extra five minutes in the parking lot, that means that you weren't in your cubicle at 9:03 when Stanley from Accounting wandered by with his giant stack of papers, and when Mary Sue said hello to him, he got distracted and tried to wave and ended up dropping those papers. Had you been at your cubicle, you'd have swooped down to help him but since you weren't there, Stanley is crouched on the floor alone and doesn't notice Joe coming at him with a paper trolley so when he stands up, he and Joe collide and Stanley loses his balance and goes face-first toward the trolley and breaks his nose when he hits the metal handle on his way down.

Now Stanley has to go to the hospital to get his nose set because you wanted to sit in your car and spend five extra minutes hating your life that morning.

If the sacred timeline says that Stanley is supposed to be in that ER at that specific time on that specific day, and no other set of circumstances would get him there, because this will ultimately take Stanley down the road to whatever greater journey he's supposed to go on, then it has to happen. But say you exercise your free will and decide not to wait those five minutes, because the free will applies to every choice you make, even the tiny, insignificant ones. You chose to put on your big person pants and took a deep breath and just head inside - and because you chose to do that and because you were at your cubicle to help Stanley with his papers, Stanley never ends up in the ER and the timeline that's supposed to happen is suddenly at risk and the TVA has to get involved (I assume).

So having free will introduces way, way too many variables into a fixed timeline to ever keep track, because you're taking these tiny, seemingly insignificant choices that people are making every minute of every day, and you're multiplying them by trillions of sentient beings in the universe, and you're saying the fate of the timeline and reality itself depends on all of these beings either always making the choice they're supposed to make or constantly sending the TVA out whenever they don't.

It's fair to conclude, then, that both free will and a fixed, single timeline can't exist at the same time. Either you adhere to the fixed timeline and everyone does exactly what they're supposed to do every second of every minute of existence, or you have free will and autonomy over all of your decisions, no matter how big or small, and those decisions can result in a number of outcomes, ultimately leading you to one of several possible destinations.

Case in point: Tony didn't have to snap his fingers in Endgame. He chose to. Had he not, Thanos would have won. It doesn't matter if there was one way to victory or 14 million ways to failure; the timeline could ultimately only go one of two ways and the choice Tony willingly made determined that Thanos lost. It wasn't predetermined because if Tony had not chosen to snap his fingers, the timeline would have gone the other way.

My personal belief - and this isn't necessarily for the MCU, but in general - is that we do possess free will and the future is ever shifting and changing because nothing is written in stone. It holds up against most, if not all, of the world's belief systems. For example, if you believe that people have guardian angels, the rule is generally that your guardian angels can help you but you have to ask them; they can't decide to intervene without your permission because to do so would infringe upon your free will.

Similarly, you can go on etsy and pay $5 for a funsies psychic reading or pay a lot more money for an in-depth, specific tarot reading and both will tell you that the outcomes may change depending on the paths you take, and that their ultimate advice is for you to keep your focus on your goals and your own self so that you can be subconsciously manifesting the best possible future for yourself. (Not that I know this from experience. It was one time. It was a few times. My point stands, and also stop judging me.)

To get back to the MCU, though - if you determine that both a single, fixed timeline and free will can't simultaneously exist, and your ultimate purpose is upholding said timeline and not letting anyone fuck it up, lest it break off into lots of different branches, then it poses a pretty serious moral and/or ethical question of - who decides what choices we make and what paths we're destined for? The time lizards? Who gave them that authority? Did anyone, or did they just manifest themselves into existence one day, create the universe, and then decide all of the rules (and, if so, where does that leave the norns and the gods and other super powerful beings who are generally thought to be in charge of things)?

If free will doesn't exist and everyone is acting based on what has been predetermined for them by some higher being (or, in this case, time lizards), it takes away our autonomy, and if everything we do and every single tiny step we take is decided for us, what makes us any different than cogs in a machine just following orders? What separates us from robots?

Speaking of robots, it's interesting to me that the TVA's screening process (if you can call it that) has a failsafe against robots specifically. Any robot that might come through is destroyed immediately and in this case, “not a robot” is defined, more or less, as a sentient being that possesses a soul. What does the TVA have against robots if their ultimate goal is ensuring that the robotic machinations of the time lizards are consistently carried out to protect the sacred timeline?

A soul makes you human; the energy of the soul is what you, at the core, are. It can be assumed that having a soul also means that you have some sort of moral and ethical code by which you live your life but, if you don't also have free will, then what is the point of possessing a soul and a moral and ethical code?

Loki is a villain and he's told by Mobius, the TVA, Odin, and pretty much everyone who ever meets him that the only thing he's good for - the only reason he exists - is to cause pain and suffering and death. This has been predetermined for him; this is not his fault and he did not choose it. And every single choice he makes has either already been destined as the choice he was supposed to make, or will be pruned so it won't grow into the wrong timeline. Ultimately Loki can change neither his final destination, nor the purpose and meaning of his existence.

Which leads me to the theory that the several Loki variants that the TVA keeps coming across are the result of Loki consistently resisting against his predetermined path; he's trying to find the timeline where he is able to latch onto and keep his own free will in defiance of the timekeepers but, so far, he hasn't been successful. This could segue into why the current Variant is now going scorched earth and just obliterating the main timeline completely - because if there is no sacred timeline, there's nothing dictating who or what Loki can be, and free will is regained. If there's a multiverse that branches and branches beyond anyone's control, then there must be a branch in there, somewhere, where Loki can exist on his own terms and decide how his own story goes.

This also might be a theory for why Loki is already setting his sights on taking over the TVA (assuming that's not just something he told the variant for reasons). But my original point in delving into all this is to ask: if Loki is predestined to always be a villain whose story plays out exactly the same way because that's what's supposed to happen, then how can anyone ever hold his misdeeds against him? He's literally just existing as the timekeepers decided he would exist and everyone is blaming him for it.

And this leads me to ask, as well, if one's soul is generally good, and one possesses more good traits than bad, what is the logic in making them exist only for pain and destruction? If it's for a greater good, then it stands to reason Loki is not the only one predestined for misery, and what greater good could come from all that suffering?

Conclusion: the existence of the TVA as an organization means that there is one fixed, sacred timeline but the existence of said timeline is immoral and unethical because it means no one actually has any free will at all in the MCU. The very notion of heroes and villains is pointless because it has nothing to do with your own qualities or morality, it's literally the luck of the draw. In order to have free will, the sacred timeline has to be destroyed, and so my prediction is that the Big Bad of the Loki series is not the TVA and not the time keepers but the actual timeline itself, and the entire fate of the MCU rests on whether or not Loki can ultimately succeed.

Also, don't be late for work.

#well this was a journey #smfh #i hope it at least makes *some* sense #loki series meta #loki tv series spoilers #loki series spoilers #loki spoilers #long post #i should have revised this before posting lmao #i went back and edited some of it but meh #it's pretty nonsensical i think but also i confuse myself really easily so

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groovegalaxxxy5 · 3 years

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The Art School AU nobody asked for

I’ve had this idea for an emercury AU fic kicking around in my head for a while now, but I have so many other projects on my plate rn and nowhere near enough time or energy to write it. So instead I’m just gonna post all the deets in the hopes that one day I’ll be able to come back and actually do something with it.

Emercury Art School AU Summary:

“Emerald Sustrai may have managed to get into the dance program at one of the most prestigious art schools on Remnant, but she has one big issue – after just one year of study, she’s barely managing to stay afloat even with two part-time jobs and her grades have been suffering for it. Fortunately for her, her school offers extra credit to any students who are cast in the school’s yearly exhibition performance. Unfortunately, this year’s production’s theme is “passion” and the only spot up for audition for sophomores in the dance program is for a couples’ dance performance based on said theme.

Enter one Mercury Black—a fellow dance student with a reputation unsavory enough to overshadow his considerable talent, and quite possibly the last person on Remnant Emerald would ever want to work with…He also happens to literally be the only other person she can find to pair up with her for the show. Somehow, improbably, the unlikely duo actually make a pretty good team once they finally start to work out their differences, but as they perfect their routine for the big audition, Emerald finds herself in a whole new predicament: She may have set out to steal the show, but if she’s not careful she might just end up getting her heart stolen in the process...”

So yeah…as you can see, the basic premise is that Em and Merc are classmates at this school for the arts, but both of them are having trouble earning passing marks in this one foundation course they both need to graduate—Emerald because she is completely on her own and has to work a lot to pay for her living expenses and studio fees and stuff even though she has a pretty decent scholarship, and Mercury because he keeps really odd hours and misses class quite a bit for unexplained reasons. Noticing that she’s struggling even though she is a gifted dancer, one of Emerald’s teachers suggests that she try out for the big show that their school puts on every school year, since anyone who makes the cut receives a bunch of extra credit and each faculty also gives a grant to the students who they judge to have put on one of the top three best performances. The problem is, there are only a limited number of spots up for audition for each graduating year of each concentration course due to time and resource restraints, and this year’s 2nd year dance spot happens to be billed as a couples’ performance.

Emerald hits up everybody she can think of, but they're all too busy or can't commit to the project for other reasons. Pretty much out of options at that point, she’s just about ready to give up when she has a chance encounter with a classmate, one Mercury Black, after school. Through some sort of clerical error they managed to book the exact same practice studio for exactly the same time, and since they both really need the extra practice time and neither one is willing to back down, they end up sharing the room for a few hours. When they do, Emerald is really surprised to find out that Mercury is actually a really talented dancer, she just never noticed before because even though they have some classes together he comes in very irregularly. After a long, sleepless night contemplating doing something really, really ill-advised, she ends up approaching him at school the next day to propose that they team up and audition for the big show together since they appear to both be failing the same class and need the credit really bad, and to her surprise he agrees rather easily.

Thus, the two of them become reluctant accomplices. However, once they start working out the choreography together, they just can’t seem to see eye-to-eye on anything, which doesn’t bode very well for their performance considering that it’s supposed to embody the show’s theme. Emerald is more of a ballet dancer, while Mercury is more of a street dancer, having started out with breaking and had almost zero classical training before starting school. After a while (with a lot of practice and a LOT of unsolicited intervention from their nosy friends) our two favorite mayhem children finally start to bond and find some common ground, and naturally, lighthearted romantic hijinks ensue and sparks fly between the unlikely duo as they struggle to cooperate and put together a passionate couples’ dance good enough to get into the final production.

The Supporting Cast:

Em’s peeps -- Cinder (in the class above, sort of her mentor and was the one who encouraged her to apply to school in the first place), Weiss (met in freshman year, in the same ballet, jazz and contemporary classes this year, snarking buddies), Blake (ended up in most of the same classes together this year), Coco (upperclassman in the design course, loves dressing Em in different outfits and often forces her to stand in as a house model for her when she needs to work late into the night to meet a deadline)

Merc’s peeps -- Sun (met in class in freshman year, breaking and sparring buddies), Neptune (met thru Sun, in pop class together this year), Scarlet (ditto), Blake (in a few classes together, waits tables at the same diner where he works), Yang (met at a stunt training camp the Summer of freshmen year, waits tables at the same restaurant, fellow gym rat and occasional sparring partner)

Salem -- Headmistress of the most prestigious arts school on Remnant; has a bitter love-hate (mostly hate) relationship with her ex

Oz -- The headmistress’ ex-husband who runs a very successful Circe du Soleil type show and recruits a lot of his performers from her graduating classes

Glinda -- Chair of the dance department; Contemporary and ballroom dance instructor; is so so weary of her faculty’s incessant bickering

Winter -- Ballet instructor; came up in a rigid traditional Atlesian ballet school and generally looks down on all the other dancing disciplines and their instructors (”What they do can BARELY be described as dancing”); wishes the dance department were as disciplined as the music department

Qrow -- Jazz and tap dance instructor; doesn’t think that what his sister does really counts as actual dancing; jazz hands, rain hands and double dream hands and he’s dead serious about em

Raven -- Acrobatic and contortion instructor; thinks jazz hands look really stupid, just like Qrow and his corny, goofy ass dancing; was actually trained extensively in traditional Mistralian Highlands step dancing from childhood alongside her brother and used to perform internationally before switching disciplines

Tai Yang -- Hip-hop and pop dance instructor; specializes in pop and lock; Raven's ex; constantly catching strays from Qrow and Raven’s feud; just happy to still have a job tbh

Arthur & Tyrian -- Co-chairs of the theater department; Arthur teaches classical acting and Tyrian teaches method acting and they both think the other doesn’t teach “real acting”; somehow their department is actually really popular and all the students love the yearly musical theater production, which is the only time they ever seem to agree on anything

Hazel -- Long-suffering theater production instructor; works really hard to keep things running smoothly in the background despite the department heads' antics; hates the headmistress’s ex with a burning passion

Ironwood -- Chair of the music department; runs his department like a well-oiled machine and has put the fear of god into all his students; has won the national marching band championships seven years running

All the other students are in various departments at their school—e.g. Ruby plays the sax, Yang and Jaune are both acting majors, Oscar plays the cello, Nora and Ren play the tuba and the erhu respectively, Pyrrha is a triple threat etc.

A bunch of random plot points:

-Merc, Em and their friends are all in the same foundation classes together and the two of them start off vaguely aware of one another mostly owing to the fact that all their friends are friends, but they don’t really know each other (…or DO they??? *DUN DUNNN DUNNNNN*)

-Most of the faculty at their school can’t stand each other and the different departments have been engaged in bitter rivalries for years but somehow they all work really well together because at the end of the day they’re all professionals who are good at their jobs

-All of their friends are convinced that they’re secretly dating or hooking up at the very least, because they suddenly start hanging around each other a lot, holing up in the practice studio together until all hours of the night and showing up school at the same time the next morning and are constantly snipping at each other whenever they interact. Merc’s squad is actually v supportive and (against his wishes) are doing their very best to try and help their boy lay down the mac (Sun: “Hey Merc! Thanks for letting me drive the convertible last weekend!😉👍”) , even though they all generally acknowledge that he’s way out of his league and is headed down the path to utter destruction. Meanwhile, Em’s friends are pretty appalled by her abysmally low standards (Weiss: “Emerald, you’re dating down....WAY down.🙁”) and think that shes going thru some kind of self-destructive phase or something. They’re convinced she’s about to have her life absolutely ruined by that one smirky fuccboi type from their grade who has super sus habits and “reeks of criminality” (also Weiss).

-Almost everybody including most of his friends are convinced that Mercury is doing something really, really shady for cash on the low because he keeps super odd hours, misses class a lot and is always showing up with all these bizarre, unexplained injuries. In reality, Em finds out that it’s all because he’s been training as a stunt-man outside of school and works a lot of weird hours at his part-time job so that he can pay off his prosthetics, finance his extra courses and pay for his own living expenses, etc. Although he actually was involved in some serious criminal activity in the past, he’s been trying his best to stay on the straight and narrow ever since he finally cut ties with his scumbag dad, and now just works a lot of nights and weekends as a short order cook at the local greasy spoon.

-Once Mercury realizes that Emerald is like...constantly on the brink of starvation because she’s a destitute vagabond baby but has too much pride to ask for help, he starts subtly bringing her leftovers from work, which she grudgingly accepts (because he owes her for putting him onto the whole extra credit thing, so it’s not really charity...definitely NOT because she is extremely susceptible to offerings of food and her partner also happens to be a surprisingly good cook).

-Cinder is in the year above them and has known Emerald since they were in the foster system together as kids. She’s a prodigy at ballet and also a very accomplished acrobat and contortionist (as in, like, can easily shoot an arrow into a bullseye with just her feet while her legs are bent backwards all the way over the top of her head and stuff). At some point she sits in on one of Em and Merc’s rehearsal sessions and ends up dragging the hell out of them both for being way too stiff and exhibiting almost zero chemistry despite the “obnoxiously obvious sexual tension” between them. She basically ends up barking directions at them until they alter their choreo a bunch and finally start to look somewhat like an actual couple ("For fuck's sake... Lift her like she's the most precious thing you've ever laid eyes on and you're about to make sweet love to her, you idiot, not like she's a frigging sack of potatoes you're bringing home to peel!!!" "This man is supposed to be the moon to your stars...if you don't loosen up and melt into his arms like your soul is on fire, I will flip ALL this shit over and burn this wretched studio to the ground with both of you trapped inside!!!" ), after which things gradually start to get all awkward and messy between them because they start thinking about one another differently.

-They get into a bunch of compromising situations by virtue of the fact theatre and dance people are just kinda naked a lot and don’t care. At various points in the story their friends will walk in on the two of them in some sort of really eyebrow raising situation, get the complete wrong idea and run away, which in turn makes the two of them start to feel awkward as hell toward each other.

-Coco forces them to wear matching outfits that she made just for their performance.

-Their act ends up being this spicy contemporary couples’ dance that incorporates a lot of elements of acrobatic dance, breaking and ballet, essentially blending together both of their unique dance backgrounds.

This story idea has absolutely nothing to do with canon and Remnant is a lot like modern-day Earth with some exceptions, so there are no semblances etc. There’s no antagonist; in fact everyone around them is generally supportive and wants them to succeed--the main conflict comes from Emerald and Mercury only having three brain cells between them and not being used to caring about someone else in a lovey-dovey sort of way. I got the idea when I was watching dance videos online and started remembering all those cheesy dance-themed teen movies from the 90’s and early 2000’s. It’s pretty much just a wholesome little meet-cute/will-they-won’t-they type school romance in that same vein, where Em and Merc are forced to team up out of necessity, start to fall for each other and then have to deal with all the awkwardness that ensues...all with a bunch of help from their extremely eccentric, meddling-ass friends who are all convinced that the two of them are either already dating or about to be and are trying to keep them both from getting their hearts broken lol

Whew! Guess that’s about it for now...I’d like to try and flesh this one out more and maybe even publish it as a legit fic one day, but first I’ve gotta get back to work on *signal lost*

#rwby #emercury #emerald sustrai #mercury black #fic ideas

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pookiesmcbride · 4 years

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*sorry this is very long but i have a bit of a finale headcanon at the end :)*

i’m almost 100% positive that caryl will have an important interaction in the finale. whether it’s canon or something close to it, we’ll get something good for them. the writers wouldn’t leave their relationship how it is right now and especially not when they have the excuse of putting a big caryl moment in a finale. those few seconds of weirdness when carol came back was supposed to be that way, bc we’re supposed to get this feeling that theyve got unfinished business between each other, that no, they’re not on good terms rn and it’s never rly been like this between them before- but it could never stay that way.

further proof that we’ll get something is that carol went back to ASZ to make things right with those she loves, bc “it’s never too late.” considering carol doesn’t open up to her fam much, if at all, kelly is a great first step in this direction. we need to remember that carol probably never opened up to Ed all those years bc it most likely ended in a beating. plus with tobin she wore a mask the entire time, and she never wanted to open up to ezekiel either, which was kinda the cause of their rise and their downfall. zeke never knew the “real carol”, so she was content to live this little fairytale bc she could ignore all these demons in her head. there’s a common theme with carol and wearing these masks, and ending up alone a lot, hence the mention of “lonewolf” from kelly.

IMO, the last person, if not the only person ever, that carol has actually opened up to is daryl. he’s the one person noticing that she’s not being herself, and thus the only one that is caring about that. in 10x14 i think carol realizes this fact. “i could never let that happen.” she knows how important daryl is to her and if she ever wants to get to her real, happy self in the future, she’s gotta go back to daryl and make sure he’s okay, and that their relationship is okay. he’s the only one that really truly knows her, and considering hes one of the first in carol’s life to be this person for her, it’s overwhelming.

the problem now is talking to him. she wants to, and i believe he wants to as well, but it’s carol who’s gotta make the move here. getting thru the nitty gritty with him is so much harder than kelly because she knows him so much better, and she has it engrained in her head that she’s ruined his future and their important bond from her actions, how do you even begin to talk about that ya know? any word i say could ruin this forever, wtf do i even say? she was crying even talking to kelly, with daryl her emotions will be tenfold.

daryls done everything he could to let her know he’s a safe space - and his frustration rn is that she’s still running and not wanting to take him up on his many offers to talk to him- but she needs to decide. talking to kelly is a good baby step to get this courage to talk to him. like oh, maybe all of this turmoil and hatred is coming from my own head, my fam doesn’t actually despise me as much as i think. daryl probably still does, but there’s a chance he may not, maybe i’ll go take the chance.

i’m not sure how this conversation will begin or the circumstances they’ll be in when they do this. (i do think tho that connie will be revealed as dead beforehand) . maybe carol will blurt it out when they’re pushing back a big horde or something, or maybe there’s a moment of quiet in the hospital and they’ll be sitting like they were when carol was hallucinating daryls speech about his dad. i have no idea. but i imagine they’ll say some things like this.

“daryl..do you wanna know why i asked you not to hate me? ive told you before that i cant lose you, but it’s more than just in death. so much more. you’re the person that could bring me back from this. sometimes i get really caught up in this shit but i always seem to come back to you and things get a little better. you don’t have to forgive me for what happened, please don’t. i deserve it. but i just... really need you with me. you’re the last one daryl.. the last one who knows me. i cant be alone with myself.

did anyone ever tell you about what happened to lizzie and mika? *proceeds to choke thru the story and how she’s being plagued by her kids all the time. i imagine daryl begins holding her thru this and she’s talking into his chest/shoulder* I’m a fucking monster daryl. i kill kids and anyone else who’s in my path. dont forgive me for what happened in that cave either. i hate that i didn’t listen to you. i didn’t listen to a word you said and now connies gone. *starts sobbing* you tried so hard for me and i just... ruined everything for you. the one girl you cared about, the future you were fighting for, daryl i’m just so sorry.”

*i imagine there being some silence as daryl lets carol get all her tears out. then daryl starts talking into her hair or something*

“you know you’re not a monster. the farthest thing from it carol. you’ve saved us more times than i can count on my hands, and that includes you killing lizzie. she could’ve hurt even more people, you did the right thing. and you even saved judith over there, look where she is now *points to judith takin a little nap across the room*

you’ve always got the best intentions. nothing you could do would push me away, you need to know that. what hurts the most is you always try to get away from everyone. from me. *looking into her eyes at this point* you think everyone hates you enough to be fine with you gone? carol i can’t lose you as much as you do me... and that’s terrifying. *chuckles* never realize i need you more than when you’re not here. never felt i needed anyone before i met you, honest. *goes back to hugging her to his chest so he can get the courage to say this next part*

you were the first person i tried to find when that cave collapsed. i stayed put in those woods a few days ago waiting, just staring into the dark for you to come back to us. the reason i fought so hard for you to fight for a future is that i wanted you to be here for mine. you’re the only one i can see clearly in it, and if you were dead... god i dunno where i’d be. but you’re the girl i care about. connie was a great friend, but i really just need you. i just... please stay.”

*then i imagine carol carefully moving away from his chest with tears in her eyes and the biggest smile, she wipes his tears a bit and keeps her hand there. they stare at each other for a quick sec then look at each other’s lips, slowly moving in then BOOM cockblock from something and now we have to wait until s11*

sorry this ended up being vv long all in all I HAVE HOPE OK hope y’all are staying healthy and hopefully we don’t have to wait too long for this beauty🥺

#caryl #caryl positivity #idk how to make text under a cover #so deal with the scrolling if u dont wanna read dammit #love them w my whole ass heart

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strawberryfics · 3 years

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Bnha Aladdin Au

So for my request, can you write Izuku, Ochako and Tenya in an Aladdin AU please?- @princeasimdiya12

Green= Izuku

Blue= Iida

Pink= Uraraka

Purple= Tsuyu

Princess Uraraka was finally turning 18 and on the day she shall become the Emperor of (Where Ever) but for her to claim her title from her father she must find a spouse or spouses 😏.

This all takes place on an Arabian Afternoon, the day of the future queen's ball. Princes and Princesses are invited from all over the land in a chance to become the next Emperor alongside Uraraka. ( Yes I did make All Might a Monkey)

“Come on how hard could it be All Might, we just sneak in and wow the Princess.” Deku sighed. He has been an orphan since childhood and he did love the streets but he always wondered what else was out there. “Just imagine it All Might, us in a castle where no one would treat us like we're replaceable, somewhere where we would be loved” “Heyy don’t give me that look.”

*to Uraraka*

“But Father why must I find a prince to marry, there all snobby and weird. I could rule by myself”

“Uraraka My dear, we’ve been over this. There must be a man to run the kingdom”

“But why Father I could-“

“ Hush now my dear go get ready for the ball, you must find a suitable marriage candidate soon”

“Yes Father”

Uraraka began to head back to her room. ~Why doesn’t he think I can run the country on my own, I’m good enough for it right ~ She began to lose herself in her thoughts, as she made her way to her room.

*With Deku

Izuku had been following the back road to the castle, knowing how many people were coming he decided the back roads would be his best option. As he walked he talked with All Might about their strategies.

“Okay here me out, what if we just kinda waltz in there”

“Yeah, that’s not gonna work. How do you people break into castle do you know All Might?” He chuckled as he continued to think of ways to get in until he saw a Grey cartridge coming down the road

*Green* “Heh heh there gonna pass us right All Might, oh god what if they don’t.”

Just as Izuku began the worry the cartridge began to stop and a Handsome young Man with Blue Hair and glasses walked out and approached Izuku.

*Blue*“Excuse me kind sir, Would you happen to know which way the palace is?”

*Green* “ Just continue to follow this path straight ahead, hmm but any chance are you heading to the Princesses Ball tonight”

*Blue* “Why yes I am actually, I’m Prince Tenya of the Southern Islands, why do you ask?”

*Green* “uh erm my uh- oh My cartridge broke one of its wheels on the way here, I’ve been looking for someone who.... sells.. wheels” ~Oh my god why can’t I think fast ansjksk He's gonna know he’s gonna know~

*Blue* “What did you say your name was young man?”

*Green* “ Um Sir no Prince Izuku of the All Mightson King...Dom”

*Blue* “Well Prince Izuku, why don’t you ride along with me then”

*Green* ~ That worked, really!?~ “Of course Prince Tenya, I’d be uh Please to accompany you”

Izuku climb into the carriage and began his ride to the Castle

*Blue* “ So What’s a street rat like you doing trying to get into the Palace?”

*Green* “What?! ~oh god he does know ahh what do I say uh I ansnksks~ I- well you see

*Blue* “Go on pRiNcE iZuKU”

*Green* “ I want to meet the future Queen and well maybe... marry her?”

Iida chuckled at this statement. A street rat thought he could just waltz through the palace gates, wow the Princess, and marry her He thought to himself.

*Green* “Well if you knew that I wasn’t who I said I was then why’d you still offer me a ride?”

*Blue* “Calm down Izuku, I- uhm I picked you up because you uhh erm

He began to blush

“you were kinda cute~

*Green* “What did you say?”

*Blue* “. You seemed lost! I said you seemed lost”

“Anyway fix yourself we’ve arrived at the Palace”

Izuku brought himself to the window of the carriage to see the Palace in all of its glory.

“Woh it’s... beautiful”

Iida Chuckled as he fixed Izuku's hair for him.

~Tenya control yourself, he’s a street rat for goodness sake~

The carriage slowed to a stop and an elegantly dressed man opened the door

“I’m glad you’ve arrived safely Prince Tenya and,

*Green* Prince Izuku of the Mightson Kingdom”

“And Prince Izuku welcome to the Palace”

*Blue* “come on let’s go inside so we don’t miss anything”

Iida and Izuku entered the palace and made their way to the ballroom.

*Uraraka*

“Heh, at least the dress isn’t so bad, right Tsu?”

*Purple* “ Yes Uraraka-Chan you look quite lovely”

*Pink* “ Thank you, Tsu.”

Uraraka made her way to the balcony and leaned on the railing,

*Pink* “I wish I could be free to live and have fun, you know Tsu?”

*Purple* “I know Princess, soon enough you’ll be able to do all those wonderful things”

*Pink* “Thanks Tsu”

*Purple* “ Princess, it’s almost time for the ball, please be on time tonight. I must go check on your father. I’ll see you soon Princess”

Uraraka turned around to wave goodbye to Tsu and went back to the view

She giggles as she saw a small carriage appear

“Someone’s late” she giggled as she watched to see which “Handsome” Prince was late

She watched as two young men emerged from the carriage, a smaller man with green hair and a slightly larger man with blue hair

“Woh, maybe some Princes are good looking” she giggled again

“Oh god, I’m gonna be late”

She starting running for the ballroom. ~why am I always late, Tsu even told me not to be late uhh~

~ Ahh please don’t fall please don’t fall please don’t fall~

Uraraka almost ran into the door as she reached the Ballroom.

~Thank goodness I’m on time, deep breaths, we’ve got to walk in confident and not like I just ran all the way here~

~ Alright one, two, three,~ She counted in her head as she made her way into the ballroom.

~Keep calm there just like you, just people~

~Ahh there all looking at me, wait no calm down it’s my party oh gosh, I’m so bad at this. I wish I could just be a normal person~

Back to Izuku and Tenya

*Blue* “Would you like a drink Prince Izuku?”

*Green* “Sure Iida, I can call you that right?”

*Blue* “Of Course, so tell me why do you want to meet the Princess so bad?”

*Green* “Well ever since I was a young boy I always wanted to be king, or well not King I just wanted people to like me like they liked the King”

*Blue* “ You had a rough childhood a presume?”

*Green* “Yeah, it’s always just been me and All Might”

*Blue* “Wait speaking of your monkey, Where did he go?”

*Green* “what do you mean he’s right, oh no where’s All Might?”

*Blue* “I don’t know, I asked you that question!”

Tenya and Izuku began to frantically search for All Might

*Green* Excuse me, sorry, coming thru, Iida let go of my.. oh god”

Izuku turned to Iida pointing to All Might right next to the Princess

*Green* “ Whatdowedo?”

*Blue* “ He’s your monkey, do something!”

*Green* “What do you want me to do call for him in front of everyone, huh?”

*Blue* “oh no”

Izuku turned his head to see All Might starring at one of Uraraka anklets

*Green and Blue* “ He’s gonna try and take it”

Tenya and Izuku began to make their way towards All Might, hoping that they’d make it in time. Izuku was now just a few feet away from All might

*Green* “ Heyy All Might, come here I’ve got uh-“

Before Izuku could even finish his sentence All Might darted for the Princess anklet

*Pink* “ Hey get off, what are you doing. ~Why is there a monkey here oh god I’m gonna make a scene~

woh hey, I’ll give it to you and you can have it just let go okay?”

All Might's mind had already been made up he needed the anklet and he wasn’t giving up

“Hey wohhhh, get off of mahhhh”

Uraraka tripped and fell onto the ground, She began to get up and watched as everyone was looking at her. She had embarrassed herself once again. With tears in her eyes, she darted to the door and made her way to her room

*Green* “ Oh nooo, What do we do Iida, should we go find the Princess, I feel so bad.”

*Blue* “I don’t know, Well let's get All Might and get the Anklet so we can return it to the Princess”

Izuku nodded his head as he ran and grabbed All Might, He dashed passed Tenya

*Green* “ Come on let’s goo”

He ran with Izuku, they were on a hunt to find a certain Princess and return the anklet. With that, the two men and the monkey followed after the Princess, anklet in hand

The ran after her along the halls and up the stairs following after her to only see her run into her room and slam the door shut

They approached the door slowly they knocked three times and wait for an answer but nothing came

*Green* “Should we just open the door, would that be intruding, do you think she’d hate us if we opened it”

he continued to ramble on as Iida opened the door with a slight hesitation

*Blue* “Princess, are you in there?”

There was no answer but the muffled cries were enough of an answer for the two boys to enter the room. As they enter red the room they saw the Princess laid upon her bed

Izuku walked up to the bed and sat on the edge as the Princess Looked up

*Green* “sorry about that, All Might is kinda obsessed with shiny things” he apologized as he handed her the anklet

Uraraka wiped her tears and took her anklet from the boy.

*Pink* “Thank you for bribing me my anklet back, but I guess I’m kinda glad you’re monkey took it”

*Blue* “Why would you be happy All Might did a terrible thing” he ranted as he stared at All Might

*Pink* “Well being the Princess is just, well overwhelming. I’ve always wished I could be a normal girl that could play in the field and travel around. I’d trade everything just to have that life”

*Green* ~Wow she seems so unhappy here, maybe having a royal life isn’t as grand as I thought ~

*Green* “ Well what if we leave the palace and the royal life behind, we could go on adventures and find treasures and have all kinds of fun”

Urarakas eyes sparkled as she listens to him go on and on about adventures and fun outside of the palace

*Pink* “ Outside of the palace sounds amazing but I don’t think I can go with you. My father would never allow it, he won’t even let me leave the palace grounds. I’m sorry but I’ll have to decline your offer”

Iida noticed the frown on both Izuku and Urarakas faces.

*Blue* ~There so... beautiful even with frowns, I can’t help but want them to smile again~

*Blue* “ I’m not one for going against rules but what if we sorta leave without telling anyone”

*Green* “ That’s called running away Iida”

*Blue* “ Well do you have a better plan perhaps?”

*Green* “ No”

*Pink* “ Running away hmm, if we do that can we still go on all those adventures and do all those things you talked about?”

*Blue and Green* “ Of Course!”

*Pink* “well, let’s do it then. I wanna see the world and find adventures and um uh so many more things” she giggled excitedly

*Green* “ Well let’s go then,” he said as he grabbed Urarakas hands

Feeling a bit jealous and petty, Iida walked up behind Izuku and added his hands to the pile

*Blue* “Let’s do it”

And with that, they left the Palace together and in a rush. They left their lives behind in search of what they’ve treasured all along. To be happy and to be loved. They found their silver lining in each other and most importantly they found their happiness together

#izuku #ao3 izuku #deku #mha deku #izuku midoriya #my hero academia iida #iida #tenya #tenya iida #uraraka ochacho #my hero academia uraraka #bnha ochaco uraraka #bnha #bnha imagine #bnha imagines #mha #au #aladdin

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zachsgamejournal · 3 years

Text

COMPLETED: Thief Gold

All done! I thought this was going to take me longer (much longer). I may have cheated (used a guide), but honestly I'm ready to move on...

So first--Undercover. In a sense, this level is super easy. It's small and contained, plus you're desquised--so get to walk about freely for the most part. Ironic that I've wanted disguises in this game. Unfortunate that it's a forced use. Ah well.

The problem with this level brings me back to the 90's level design. To solve a "puzzle" the player must find four switches. After an hour or so, I had explored every inch of the level and didn't know what to do. I looked up a guide and read that the player has 5 minutes to flip 4 hidden switches. To my knowledge, there was nothing informing this, and the switches are in pretty ridiculous places. Clearly they wanted to "challenge" the player by putting them in stupid places, but it's just frustrating. Luckily I had the guide.

Next was Return to the Cathedral. I was feeling pretty done with the game when I started this level, and I hate the zombie stuff since you can't really knock em out like guards. At first I tried to rely on a guide a bit, but it was confusing (since they want you to steal EVERYTHING). I started running around and actually got pretty good at being stealthy from zombies and undead guards. But I was done with the game and didn't want to deal with this.

The guide I was using praised the level. I think they made a GoldenEye 64 referencce, or maybe I made the connection, but once outside the cathedral, it was easy to move around undetected and find the items. I relied heavily on a guide, but I think I would have been fine without if I gave it the chance. I didn't hate the level, but I wish it was regular guards.

Next came ESCAPE! This level was hard. You're introduced to new enemies that are basically demi-human guards. Unfortunately, you don't start with a ton of equipment and it's hard to begin the level steathily. I mostly just found myself sprinting through the level, trying to find the best path.

I ended up falling into a "space" area, and the guards didn't follow. I was able to move to a deadend hallway where I was trapped by four guards, but I was able to use some gas mines and arrows to knock'em out. (I really should have used these tools more.) Past that, I found myself back in the Mansion with the crazy nature levels. It was kind of a frantic mad dash to get around the baddies and rush out the front door. Lots of restarts.

Really dont' want to play that level again.

Strange Bedfellows has the player return to the Hammerite temple from Undercover. But now all the Hammerites are dead and crazy monster guys roam about. Once again, I just wanted to be done and this is a big level, so I looked up where I needed to go. Once in the basement, I was able to figure most of it on my own. I also learned to sneak around the monkey guards and knock'em out. This level offered a lot more opportunities to sneak, so not as hard as Escape.

With that success, I kept on going with Maw of Chaos. Strangely, this level was super linear. It made it really easy. In fact, I mostly just ran past all the enemies. Fuck it. I'm kind of surprised, cause this seems like the time you should making crazy-ass maze levels. But I'm also thankful they didn't do that. They did do some cool anti-grav water stuff, allowing me to swim on the cieling. Ridiculous, but interesting.

And then you get to the bad guy. All you have to do is place the eye while his back is turned. Strangely simple, but I'm also thankful that I can put this game to rest.

I've had trouble keeping track of the story. You get 30-60 second videos about this or that between levels, and then you play the levels for a few hours without much narrative at all. So I constantly lost the plot. At the end, The Keepers--who helped your character--try to explain how destiny isn't yet done with the character. The character is typical, 90s macho--"You tell the keepers I'm through!" I get that the writers thought he sounded tough, but I thought he just sounded naive and stupid. I don't know how you defeat a god from prophecy while battling zombies and mantis-men just to be like, "Everything's fine and I don't need help from magic-dudes."

Ultimately, I loved this game (despite its flaws) and I'd love to play thru again one day. But I've got Thief 2 & 3 waiting in the wings. I love the emphasis on stealth and the de-emphasis on killing. I wish it had been open world and allowed for disguise changes. But it's a great game for the 90s!!

#zach's game journal #zgj #COMPLETED #Thief Gold #PC #gog.com #video games #screenshot #stealth #no kills #non lethal

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superrcell · 4 years

Note

clara!! or teru mobbedpsycho

omg hehe ill do both bc i love them both so much : )

clara!

How I feel about this character

oh my god, i LOVE her? i love her so much. literally my favorite healer. her route is literally the best.

its just like. shes SO fun. shes so weird and shes so funny and i just love love love how shes written. i love that in the beginning of her own route shes like.. literally Just a little girl. like getting worried bc she told the first lie in her life ,,, its just like shes so cute. i love her and shes soooo funny oh my god. i love love love how through her route she becomes more confident with herself and her path, it seems... just like everything is so good about her.

i love her place in the game as well... shes the youngest, definitely the one who you’d probably trust the least to do a good job, and just so ... she’s so weird! i love that she is the character who becomes the sort of meta character, where the developers Know you’ve gone thru everything twice, we’re now just going to let her know all you need. plus, i fucking LOVE her powers with the hook - thats a trope i just love so much...

i love her black and white mentality? its just so interesting... i love how the world warps in her route, where people are especially evil, or are especially good. and i love. i LOVE that she’s put with all of the humbles... like i just love everything about her SO much ...

All the people I ship romantically with this character

oh, as ive said: grace!! i find their relationship incredibly cute, especially with how clara says how much she likes her in her route... plus! weird (graveyard) girls unite :) idk, i just feel like they complement each other very well, and would understand each other very well! its very cute!

to a much lesser degree, i also find capella and clara cute, but i dont have quite as many thoughts on it.

My non-romantic OTP for this character (im just interpreting this as other relationships i find interesting)

omg, so many, um ,,,

firstly, the saburovs! i think more about katerina just because of who i am, but i love thinking of if they were like . . . an actually good family. idk, its just like if the saburovs weren’t In That Situation... maybe, just maybe they would be better? they obviously care about clara very very much, as shown in those first few days... idk, i just love the idea of good families 😔

secondly, like almost every relationship she has with the humbles, or what potential relationship she’ll have in p2 now that some of them have been reworked. i cant go through the whole list because ill be here all day, but especially rubin and her relationship; the connection she has with aspity; im interested in how the others will be reworked and how they’ll interact with clara just... ayugh i love all of the humbles so much!

thirdly, um. okay not to be a termite stan but thinking of her relationship with some of the termites is super interesting... in particular, as ive said, grace and her seem like they could very well be very good friends if not gfs, and sticky! theyre both thieves ... i feel like it can be very interesting, though i doubt they would be really close hsdjkgjk still! i just love thinking of her potential relationship with the other kids.

fourthly, also aglaya because of her connection with clara, with knowing. Everything about their world is so interesting. plus, just how aglaya treats her is so... interesting? shes just SO different in clara’s route, its so interesting...

and lastly, as i said: her relationship with block! i dont have too many thoughts, but i find his care for her very very interesting and sweet... im interested in how their relationship will be expanded upon in her route!

wait no im still adding things: her relationship with the albino! idk i just find her relationship with the creature of the steppe so sweet... its just like the bond between them its just so nice and it makes me so 💖thinking about it in her route...

My unpopular opinion about this character

clara best healer! clara’s route is the best! i hate it when people only use her for their daniil/artemiy ship shit! she doesnt give a shit about them! stop pushing her off to the side! her route is unfinished, yes, thats really only the side quests from day 8 on! the main quest is always different! just play her route! shes not just some weird person who only speaks in metaphors, shes also a little girl! i love clara very much!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

oh, hmm... her route to be finished, and actually full of details? ghdsjkgj really though, i remember people saying that they might go for a genre shift with the other two routes in p2, and i think her’s being more horror would be SO cool... i also hope that we can hug people in her route as well, oh my god. oh my god. please let me hug the saburovs.

-------

teruki!

How I feel about this character

i LOVE teru! hes absolutely, 100%, completely my favorite mp100 character. hes such a huge comfort character to me as well its just like i looveee his character. hes so SO funny and hes so dumb but also hes like SO smart and. hes SOOOO smart and i just can relate to him a lot! who am i but a constant string of “oh yeah im very smart and i can do this amazingly” and then almost immediately being followed by someone showing me up,

plus, i feel like hes just my favorite character archetype. its just like! i am such a huuugeeee fan of characters showing off and trying to act big but are hiding behind a ton of insecurities. or well, maybe not quite hiding behind them, but having a lot of them. after all i think teru truly is just Like That, though his actions in his arc were heavily motivated by these insecurities... idk i just love him so much. hes just really relatable to me in some aspects and in all others i just find so fun. hes such a great character!

All the people I ship romantically with this character

oh, mob ofc! i dont think about the ship all that much, but i think its rlly cute, and i definitely feel like teru has a lot of love in his heart for mob! its rlly nice and can be very sweet c:

My non-romantic OTP for this character (im just interpreting this as other relationships i find interesting)

mob! once again i just think their friendship is just really nice, and i love how much teru cares for mob! plus theyre so funny gdhksjjg idk theyre just a fun team!! i love them!! i dont have many other thoughts, as i feel like their relationship is explored constantly, and i dont have many new thoughts to bring to the table. i just love it when their shown in a fun light c:

also, now idk if ive ever given this vibe off but, i LOVE found families, so i looveeee love love the au where reigen and serizawa take in shou, tome, and teru! like even outside of the au, i feel like a friendship with shou would be so nice? its just like the shared familial issues 😔plus i think theyd be hilarious together. no matter what i see them as having a more brotherly relationship! i like especially thinking about them playing games together, and same with tome! which like tome, oh my god i feel like theyd be so fun together and just the thought of them as siblings sounds like it could very very easily go badly because of clashing personalities but idk... i just feel like it could also be really nice and fun :) i love thinking about the sibling relationships in mp100 so much because theyre all just so fun characters and it feels like it can always result in such a fun and not like... angsty atmosphere. like i can just see them as being actual siblings, and its nice!

also, reigen ofc! i mentioned that i like the idea of reigen taking him in, though i think reigen might not be a . . . great parental figure. but i just really like the found familyness of it... plus, okay, this is going to be obvious since im such a teru stan, but the one omake where reigen takes them all out for a “client” but it just is reigen trying to give them all a fun summer day because teru mentioned how his family doesnt ever really see him... oh my god its about That. just an adult figure caring for teru makes me happy and thats why i love their relationship so much.

also, i have much less thoughts about this (or at least now i do), but the idea of teru and ritsu being friends sounds so funny. like i dont have many thoughts on it; its all mainly this comic on them

My unpopular opinion about this character

hmmm, i think all of my opinions are echoed by the people in my corner of the fandom, but one i can think of is like just about Every take on his fashion sense is so cold, besides the one thats like “hes a rich teenager living on his own and thats why his fashion sense is like that.” like he obviously cares about his own appearance, but aahkdshjkg i dont think its like so much as so many people put on him. also for the love of god focus on his other interests other than fashion for once,

idk, i think most of my opinions boil down to “i dont like what hes been reduced to/what the fandom always focuses on for him.”

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

oh, hm! i wish they hadnt cut out the one scene in s2 (around the beginning of the world domination arc, at teru’s apartment) where teru basically shows off his powers and how much hes grown and knows... i get Why they cut it out, but, as far as i remember, its such a good part of his character i wish they had kept in!

i also hope that they add a little extra of him in s3 since i feel like they will have more time left over ... 👉👈

send me a character :)

#txt #patho #oh my god this is so long. i hope the read more works #thank u SO much!!! i love both of these characters it was so much fun answering this!#Anonymous

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guacameowle · 5 years

Text

V’s After End - Notes / Opinion

Below the cut will be my reactions, opinions, & spoilers for V’s After Ending episodes & endings. There’s a sprinkling of ~thirst~ & a lot of confusion/screaming throughout. I am afraid I haven’t gone back to proofread the episode reactions, so they’re likely a little messy & misspelled.

Episode reactions are at the top, separated by episode & endings. Long-winded opinion/discussion about the route itself is at the bottom.

Journey below at your own risk! xx

Episode 1

80 hourglasses for EPISODE ONE? Oh this man is EXPENSIIIIVE. How many episodes is this going to be? 8 TOTAL?! Goodness.

JUDGE OR FORGIVE?! Who am I judging & forgiving? Jihyun? Rika? Cauuuuuse... uhhhh.... that might change my answers a bit (a lot)

So this means there is going to be multiple endings, yeah?!

Probably hasn’t even kissed you yet & is already packing up, leaving, & asking you to wait for him. I WAIT FOR NO MAN (Jk I waited for this man for over a year. Fuck.)

Oh shiiiit. He’s leaving me his house?! Ok, I’ll wait. Have fun storming the castle! *waves*

Excuse me but does the news screen on Jumin’s tv in his room show a picture of Rika & a caption underneath that says “More Catfood”???

The bottom of the news reel also says “Does Jumin Han is Gay?” Please, release us. Let it die.

JUUUMIIIIN. DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF. Let us comfort each other in these trying times. *waggles eyebrows*

JAEHEE COMING THROUGH WITH SOME GODDAMN SENSE & LOGIC. MY GIRL!

SOMEONE GET THIS MAN HIS WINE! Ohhh, nevermind he’s been drinking too much. Let’s have some water now, Juju.

This man is mourning & distraught. I am so sad for him. & now they’re making him dependent on alcohol to relieve his stress? Uh, I don’t like where this is going.

If anything happens to Jumin in this ending I swear...

WE HAVE CHATS TOO?! Damn what a complex update!

Wait, Zen WANTS to see MC & Jihyun being lovey dovey? Zen’s an imposter. He’s been replaced. That’s the real secret of this After End.

Oh wait, he said he was lying. Whew.

It is weird giving replies in chats & not seeing little colorful hearts flying everywhere…

Zen coming in HOT with the “Do you think you can forgive Rika?” question. Woooow.

You bet your ass I asked if anyone has heard anything from Ray. I’m going to cry.

NEW SEVEN CG! SO CUTE! VANDERWOOD IN THE RAFT! SO CUUUUUTE!

“He’s an adorable shy man.” Instantly chose this option. Vanderwood is cuuuute. Yes, Seven, please tell Vandy that I called him adorable & shy. Then tell me his reply. Then give him my number.

Yoosung’s got a package. I’M SURE HE DOES. ::eyes emoji::

OH SHIT, JUMIN DROPPING THE DNA BOMB. Wait, riddle me why the fuck Jumin had access to Seven’s DNA in the first place...

Poor Seven, I thought he had already sort of knew/assumed the hacker was his twin. But I guess he didn’t really know until now?

Looks like I’m on the “FORGIVE” path. Unlocked a Jumin’s VA free chat. Alriiiight.

Episode 2

Ray? Omg my eyes teared up. IS HE ALIVE?! WHAT KINDA SHORT TEASE OF A VOICE IS THAT?! OMFGGGGG. D:

Episode 2 & I’m already fucking crying. Great. Awesome. Lovely.

Honestly, I’m glad they’re having this discussion about V keeping all this information to himself about Saeran’s existence & use within Magenta because that’s always had me side-eyeing V HARD. I’m still of the opinion that he should have told at least Seven & Jumin about everything sooner. I get that he wanted to save Rika, but he was responsible for Saeran. I’m still heated.

SAEYOUNG HAS GONE ROGUE!

Mailman route when?! Kidding. His voice is nice though.

“Burn the letter” JESUS, MC. CALM IT DOWN.

RIKA WENT MISSING. OMFGGGG. THIS AFTER END! I JUST WANTED TO KISS JIHYUN. WHAT THE FRICK FRACK IS GOING ON?!

“We found remnants of DNA that matched with those of Luciel scattered about in the remains of Magenta. Since the explosion was of no ordinary size….” My heart hurts. My head hurts. My soul hurts.

This super sad music is just making me feel worse. I hate this. I’m crying again. I’m getting emotional whiplash.

Ray deserved better. Full stop.

Rika & Saeyoung left alone & Ray’s theme starts playing. How fucking dare this game fuck with me. I’m literally lying on the floor in a ball, playing this game & crying. What the hell.

For a second I saw Saeyoung making that fist in the CG & thought he was about to punch Rika.

Wow can y’all believe Jihyun basically Noped the Fuck Out of his own After End?

Hey Siri, turn off Rika’s voice.

Seven is dropping a lot of truth. ::quietly sips my tea::

God, Saeyoung’s prayer to Saeran is heartbreaking. Props to this VA though, damn he’s good.

Still on the “FORGIVE” path. I’m going to have fun going back & taking the judgement path.

Episode 3

Jumin “THERE WILL BE NO MORE SECRETS” Han fucking coming through! My boy! God, I love him so much.

First sun reference we’ve had. I thought there would be more by now.

Jihyun is out there falling in love with an MC in his head that he’s hardly spoken with since he left. That… can’t be healthy, my dude.

Jumin showing up in the goddamn woods in his suit is hot.

Jumin Han is so so good, y’all. This conversation between him & Saeyoung is absolutely amazing. He’s doing his best to comfort & protect at the same time. He asked about Saeran. He’s encouraging Saeyoung to live, helping him understand he’ll come out of this pain & find new reasons to live. He’s struggling too, but he’s doing so much to reach out & help Saeyoung.

The line about creating a new family, one without blood ties, broke me.

Uhhhh…. who was that? “We found him but that woman is with him.” Saeyoung & Rika?

THE STRESS GAVE ZEN A PIMPLE. Can relate.

Hell yeah I flirted with Zen. He is still prettier than starlight.

“Why don’t you come over? :)” MC. GIRL. …. I like the way you think.

Yoosung: “WELL I’M NOT GANDHI.” I fucking lost my shit.

“Should I drive V’s car?” Uhhhhh YES.

“But you’re gonna have to drive thru the night for hours. I’m kind of worried.” Bitch, I’m from Texas. I got this. 8 hours is a SHORT TRIP.

The disrespect. They aren’t going to let me drive. I don’t need a man to drive me.

DID VANDERWOOD JUST? OMG DID HE? DID HE JUST SHOOT SAEYOUNG?! BITCH, I LOVED YOU????? & YOU DID THIS????

Omg my heart. Why do they play with my emotions like this. Whew. WHEWWW.

VANDERWOOD CG!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Saeyoung is getting a lot of love tonight from his two new dads- Jumin & Vanderwood. Soft love & tough love. Shouting love at you with a gun in your face is new though.

YES! LET’S LOOK FOR A BODY! I STILL HAVE A SHRED OF HOPE RAY IS ALIVE. C’MON CHERITZ, PLEASE.

“Would you mind giving me some spotlight now?” Please let this be foreshadowing. I would eat UP a Vanderwood route.

Is another agency trying to kidnap Saeyoung? I am confusion? His dad?

Still on the “FORGIVE” path. Yoosung’s VA has a cute voice. I liiiiike.

Episode 4

My Yoosung is so sad. This boy has a lot of hate built up in him. First for V, now for Rika &&& V. Goodness.

She? Who the hell is Rika talking about? She who?!

Seems like everyone is concerned that MC will pity or listen to Rika too much. Hmm. Hmm hmmm…

Jumin is getting shit DONE.

2 years flashback. ????

Mika?! Who the fuck? Is this the “she” Rika was talking about earlier?

What he hell kinda narrative? Who is this woman? Supposedly some other girl from the orphanage Rika was a part of. She’s introduced & being used as the device that implanted this idea into Rika’s brain that she had “a devil” inside of her? She’s the reason Rika broke it off with V? Why? This feel like it cheapens everything. & why the hell is she calling Rika “Mina”? Is that Rika’s real name & I just forgot?!

IS RIKA LYING? WHY DID SHE WAIT THIS LONG TO TELL SAEYOUNG ABOUT THIS “STURDY ROOM”? COULD SAERAN REALLY BE ALIVE? Or is she trying to trick Saeyoung into leaving the cabin?!

Ok so the twins’ father has to be in on this somehow. He’s probably the one trying to get Saeyoung, I get that much. Omg... what if the reason they didn’t find proof of Saeran being dead is because his dad snatched up the remains?! Or kidnapped him alive? Or or or

Still on the “FORGIVE” path. This is hard. I want to be mean. 😈

Episode 5

I don’t know why I go into this game thinking I will just get to kiss the pretty boy. Or any boy.

Ok so more hints dropped their dad is probably involved.

“I am waiting for a letter.” GIRL, FUCK V’S LETTER. HE IS NOT HERE. SHIT IS GOING DOWN. LIVE IN THE MOMENT. IF HE WANTS TO BE OFF SMELLING FLOWERS, LET HIM. I AM TIRED.

I hope hope hope they find Saeran. Please please PLEASE.

I FORGOT. IF RAY IS ALIVE HE IS GOING THROUGH DETOX ALONE BURIED UNDER RUBBLE & ASH. I AM LIVID! WHAAAAT! SAVE. HIM.

Zen’s “WOOOOW” made me laugh.

These new CGs are a delight. I like seeing the mix of characters in them, too. Zen’s hand is huge. ::eyes emoji::

Maaan, Yoosung really flipped emotional spectrums so fast about Rika. The boy is certainly driven by his emotions.

These philosophical type chats always blow me away. This game really does get you thinking about social constructs. Fun & educating. Huh.

Getting these dirty boys to wash their hands before eating.

SAERAN MADE IT OUT?!

THAT IS SAERAN’S COUGH. OMG. HE IS ALIVE?!?! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 SAERAN!!!!

Still on “FORGIVE” path.

Episode 6

Jumin, this is a very roundabout way to tell Saeyoung you care about him & just want to look after him. You long-winded, man. I adore you.

SAEYOUNG HAS MORE VALUE THAN JUST WHAT HIS HACKING ABILITIES CAN BRING TO THE TABLE! LEAN ON YOUR FRIENDS/FAMILY, SAEYOUNG. THEY CARE FOR YOU!

10 years?! I don’t know if that is a blessing or a curse. Lol. That’s a lengthy commitment for Saeyoung though.

“Why must we give up one thing once we get something else?” Yeah, Cheritz. Why must we give up one boy once we save the other boy?!?! Hmmmm???? Lmaoooo

Saeyoung in a suit & tie!!!!!!! Niiiiiiice.

How in the hell are they gonna wrap up this story?! It’s gonna be a cliffhanger isn’t it?! Omg...

Did these idiots just straight up leave Zen, Yoosung, & MC in a random cabin in the woods FOR DAYS & go back to civilization on their own? How long does it take to return Rika back to proper authorizes?! Goodness.

WHAT?!

WHAAAAT THE FUCK?!?!

V TOOK SAERAN?! WHEN? HOW? WHAT?

MY JAW JUST POPPED IT DROPPED SO HARD. WHAT THE SHIIIIIT?!?!

Uhhhh lmao uhm why are they dressed like Jedi? Jihyun is giving Obi Wan vibes right now. I’m cackling, when I shouldn’t be. This is supposed to be a serious moment, goddamnit.

I know Jihyun probably thinks he’s doing right by taking care of Saeran but AGAIN WITH THIS DOING IT ON HIS OWN BUSINESS?! Saeyoung is devastated his brother & all the while Jihyun had actually swooped him away for some self-medicated detox tour? Just more & more secrets. I’m tired.

“Let’s wait until detox is done & you don’t wanna murder your brother. So I booked a flight for next week.” A WEEK? HA! YEAH RIGHT! BEST CANCEL THAT.

Oh, he just keeps booking & cancelling flights. Lmao. Ok. I am less judgmental now.

If Saeyoung & Saeran don’t get a reunion.... I will die inside.

Unlocked the “FORGIVE” ending.

Shit that costs 80hg too? I have nearly depleted what I had saved up!

BUT HOLY SHIT Y’ALL. SAERAN IS ALIVE! 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

“FORGIVE” Ending

This song is hauntingly beautiful.

Who is this speaking?

Is Rika high right now wtf?!

God is a woman.

I am so over all this sun talk. Let. It. Go.

Weren’t security guards left with them at the cabin?! Did Rika just WALK out?!

Of course she’s going to run away & get away with everything. Mhmm ok.

NOW THEY ARE COMING FOR JUMIN’S COMPANY?! I THOUGHT THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE GOOD END WTF. I’LL FIGHT. DON’T COME FOR C&R. I’LL THROW DOWN. JUMIN BETTER NOT LOSE EVERYTHING.

So Rika is gone & for no reason Zen & Yoosung & MC are going to stay in the cabin alone? (& not have a threesome?!?!?!)

Jumin is literally putting his own company on the line to protect Saeyoung. This man is amazing. “We’ll rebuild.” My nipples are hard. Jumin has fully aroused me. I would have taken him right on a conference table.

Welcome to Rika’s Ted Talk

Well.... I am pleased she stepped up & laid the truth all out there. Took us years to get here, lads, but we did it!

Twin cribs. Hmmm.

2 YEARS LATER?! SO THIS CONNECTS TO THE GOOD END OF JIHYUN’S ROUTE?!

2 years, huh... I would have shacked up with Jumin looooong before now. That man is a whole snack. Selfless, sweet, handsome, has a cat. I’m thirsty.

Jumin’s become an alcoholic?! Great. /s I guess this is meant to show just how drastic things are? That Jumin, our token rational & logical man, is resorting to a dangerous lifestyle as a means of coping? I’m heartbroken.

“Have I kept you waiting for too long.” Yes.

His gift better be bringing Saeran on stage because if he unveils a white puzzle I will lose my fucking mind. It is nearly 4am. I haven’t slept. I just want a smooch.

Omg I think it’s happening.

It’s gonna happen.

OMGGGGG

Please let there be a CG of this

IT HAPPENED!!!!! THEY REUNITED!!!! OMG!!!!!

LONGEST HELL YEAH BOOOOY OF MY LIFE

Pink suit pink suit pink suit PINK SUIT!!!! 💗

Ohhhh... Saeran has burns all over his face & his hand. Is his whole left side burned? My poor boy.

5 years later?!? (Mmmm think about mid30s Jumin Han though 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻)

*gasp* A BABY!

Holy shit, not a baby. A full child.

Awwww Saeyoung & Saeran live together!!

YEEESSSS. GET THIS LITTLE GIRL INTO STEM!!!!

“When is Uncle Jumin gonna marry.” I marry him every few weeks, little girl. 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻 when I reread his endings.

“Daddy thinks he will never get married.” I am now sad. I want to marry Jumin.

Jaehee got a promotion. Good for her. It’s what she deserves.

Aw Lucy is cute. Surprised they didn’t give her Jihyun’s hair color.

Their house has a lot of windows. 👀👀👀 Floor to ceiling windows. 👀👀👀 Good for fucking against. 👀👀👀👀

THIS CHILD IS ALREADY LEARNING TO KEEP SECRETS. NOOOOO. BREAK THIS CHAIN!

“Daddy is good with secrets, too.” TRUST ME, LITTLE GIRL. WE KNOW. WE KNOOOW. Y’all the noise I made when I read this line. Scoff wheezing?! Full exasperation.

“But you tell everything to Mommy!” About fucking time, honestly. How long did it take for him to break his secrets habit?

Ohhhhh she’s adopted! That’s why she doesn’t have his hair color. Curious why they didn’t go with the biological child path? I certainly don’t mind adoption. It definitely feels like a sort of tribute to Rika.

Girl already has a crush on Zen. Ha! Giiiirl, same. Jihyun’s reaction was funny.

I wanna ride Zen’s motorcycle & his diiiiiiiii

7 years later & Yoosung is still addicted to LOLOL. Keep it up, Yoosung. Live your best gaming life.

Now she’s plotting murder against her own dad. Goodness. & Yoosung just TOLD her this entire dark plot of the game. Lmaooooo

What happened to Vanderwood? Did he accept working at C&R? How is he? Is he eating? Did he take a vacation away from Saeyoung? I need to know.

Jihyun’s speech to his wife is sweet. Now kiss!

Omg I can’t believe I didn’t get to smooch him at all. What.

What.

100 HOURGLASSES TO RESET?!?! HIGHWAY ROBBERY! I need to save up all over again for when (if) they drop a Saeran After End

“JUDGE” Ending

No, going back to the place you hate most isn’t a sufficient form of punishment for the crimes you’ve committed. You can’t just punish yourself & call it justice. Thank u, next.

Why the fuck is Rika called Serena now?! How many names does she have?!

Is Rika really free & just doing her own apology tour?! No trial or hospital involved? I’m????

Yoosung’s dialogue makes it seem like he still wants Rika around. Flip flop.

I do enjoy that Yoosung is a very emotional character, even if sometimes in the stories I don’t agree with him. He’s always very open & honest with how he feels, even if taken to extremes.

Jaehee’s discussion with Rika was very rational. As expected.

Damn Zen gave her the boot double quick.

Jumin: “You are a minus given a breathing body.” Ohhhhhhh my god. 😮😮😮 & he told her he wants her sent to a lab to have data collected from her. Jumin is ANGRY.

So this discussion with Saeran is meant to be in her own head, yeah?

Ok her discussion with Saeyoung felt real -ish again but then her discussion with Jihyun sounded bizarre & far-fetched again. So has she just been inside her own head this entire time?

What the fuck... is going on.

Wow, let’s toss in some sexual assault via clergymen to spice things up. Alright. /s What the hell is this?

This ending is fucking bonkers

Omg Zen’s robotic reply made me lose my shit. First time I’ve laughed because of this ending.

Poor Vanderwood. He sounded excited to have a line.

Sooo... the ending has just been a mock of how a Rika route would have gone if she had one?

Wait this was all just MC’s dream?! Rika’s dream?

& now Rika is in a coma?!? What? What???!! I’m... tired.

You know what, at least Saeyoung & Saeran are back together. Silver lining. The only silver lining to this madness.

Yoosung got a whole new look again. I’ll admit, for a hot second I thought he had become a cult leader & I was worried.

Sooo... the RFA became some sort of support group for Rika’s victims?????

Jumin doesn’t want to be a part of the meetings because he doesn’t particularly subscribe to their efficiency. Zen just doesn’t want to be involved because he doesn’t want the reminder. Jihyun basically just didn’t show up. So is this to mean the RFA has fallen apart entirely? Rename the group, change your ideals, be more open with each other, & formulate new ways to create charity events/fundraisers. Find a new purpose together! PULL. YOURSELVES. TOGETHER.

Ugh. Ugggghhhhhhh.

So, I’ve sat on this for a little under 24 hours. I let it sink in, in hopes that I could make better sense of it. But honestly, I don’t feel like I have. I feel perhaps this after end should have been listed in a separate section like the secret endings. These episodes certainly read more like a secret ending.

Rather than call this “V’s After End” I think it would make more sense to have called this “V’s Route After End” (or even “Rika’s After End”). This ending felt more like a means of giving closure to the route itself, rather than an acknowledgement of Jihyun’s relationship with MC. We were shown Saeran was alive, we were given Saeyoung & Saeran reunited with one another finally, we got answers as to what happened with Rika & how she ended up in Alaska, we found out why Jihyun was really away for two years, we had Saeyoung & Saeran stepping out from the hunting shadow of their father. Questions were answered, resolutions of sorts were given.

When I think of “after end” I’ll admit, I assumed we would be given a short snippet of story revolving primarily around Jihyun & MC post-good end, like we had for the other characters; not this dramatic saga between the end of the route & before Jihyun returns two years later.

Jihyun’s route revolved around him understanding his relationship with Rika & then distancing himself from that & trying to find himself. His route felt like it had more Jihyun x Rika content than it did Jihyun x MC content. This After End there was hardly any Jihyun x MC content as he was gone essentially the entire time. He really Noped Out of his own After End; I’m still a bit shocked I paid so many hourglasses for V content.... only to not be given V content. I admit, I feel foolish & cheated, somehow. I went in hoping for more content about a character I was interested in, only to be given this dramatic story revolving around a character I don’t particularly care for.

I’m disappointed that there is a Forgive or Judge aspect to this ending.

In the Forgive path/end, the blame of Rika’s crimes & actions is pinned on Rika’s mental illness, choice individuals swaying her into taking particular actions ( “embrace your devil” ), and various circumstances she’s had to endure & live through. By introducing this new character (Mika?), are we meant to blame her instead of Rika? Is she a scapegoat since the idea was originally hers & not Rika’s, even though Rika was the one that enacted everything? On top of this, Yoosung is shown to be reading a psychology book & also comes to the conclusion that what Rika has done isn’t really her fault, but the fault of her circumstances. All of this feels like we were being ushered into forgiving Rika and feeling guilty if we don’t. Provided you do choose to forgive Rika, she finds her own inner happiness, becomes “her own sun”, and goes off to live her life in Alaska; no consequences aside from distance (physical & emotionally) from her once friends/family & developing a negative public appeal. This forgive path directly ties in with Jihyun’s good end, implying it’s the better (intended?) ending. That doesn’t sit well with me. MC shouldn’t have to forgive their captor & tormentor in order to achieve their own “good” end.

In the Judge path/end, the other characters often show hesitancy when MC expresses she will never be able to forgive Rika. There are philosophical chats about what is actually good vs bad, what is just, & who is to decide these sort of standards. We are led to question if holding on to a grudge hurts ourselves or the other party more. And in the end, when we choose to judge Rika, the RFA falls apart; everyone is miserable. Again, the reader is left feeling as if their judgement was too harsh, too cruel, or uncalled for as the consequences of it have seeped out & negatively touched other people. Rika falls into a coma – doesn’t go off to live her life in Alaska, doesn’t find her own inner peace – & this is all because she was blamed or shunned for her actions, as opposed to being forgiven. Why does everyone’s happiness depend on MC forgiving her captor? It all left a sour taste in my mouth.

I understand the discussion of what is truly good vs bad or what is meant to be just & unjust can go fairly deep, but I feel that discussion applies only to circumstances that are in a grey area. What Rika did (attempted murder, abuse, emotional & physical manipulation, drugging/brainwashing) is clear cut wrong. There is no question that these are bad decisions. It should not be up for debate whether these sorts of actions are “good or bad.” While I do not deny that Rika’s past (whatever it fully may be as I have not read her backstory DLC) has attributed to her behaviors, it does not excuse them. I believe that mental illness does not excuse someone’s actions.

These are two very extreme endings - either Rika gets off free from her actions or she becomes comatose & succumbs to a darkness. Why have these drastic differences when you can merge the two; have Rika go through treatment to help her, serve a punishment that is fitting of her crimes, help her grow & understand, then have forgiveness come later? There were several options within gameplay along the lines of “I hope one day I can forgive her” & “I hope she finds her peace.” I see nothing wrong with not having MC forgive Rika but still wish for progress to be made.

Everyone was happier in the end where you forgave Rika, though. And isn’t that what everyone wanted in the end?

Overall, I didn’t mind Yoosung & Zen portraying the voices that provide the philosophical discussions in the routes and this After End. In fact, I enjoyed the chats with them as I tend to find philosophical discussions thought provoking, even if I do not always agree with what these characters were expressing. While MM is marketed as a visual novel romance, it has never shied away from delving into deeper topics & oftentimes tries to provide a lesson. Perhaps this time, the lesson they hoped to get across, didn’t hit the mark with me.

Yoosung’s emotions were very extreme in this After End. I have come to expect Yoosung being very up front, unapologetic, & pushy with his feelings. In a game where so many characters are often keeping secrets, it’s almost refreshing to have a character that is so viscerally open. Personally, I found it interesting that Yoosung’s feeling towards Rika had flipped so drastically. It was almost as if he was now trying to overcompensate for his previous idolization of her.

I’m still of the opinion that the world does not deserve Jumin Han. Through his own pain & suffering, through dealing with the disappearance of his dearest friend, through having to come to terms with the fact that a woman he once considered a close friend turned out to be someone so villainous, he has stepped up & even at one point risked his own company, reputation, & livelihood to protect someone he now considered family. He used his time & resources to help as much as he could. He sat & genuinely listened to Saeyoung & calmly gave input despite Saeyoung verbally lashing out at him. I’ll admit I hated that Jumin seemingly became an alcoholic, or at least heavily dependent on wine, during the stretch of time these After Ends covered. He was suffering, but because he needed to keep his shit together, he used liquor as his means of turning off his brain so he wouldn’t think too heavily about what was happening, otherwise he’d spiral. You can bet your ass that every time there was an option to choose “How is Jumin doing?” I took it, because this man needs someone to look out for him while he’s busy looking after everyone else. I love him. He remains my favorite.

I am thrilled Saeran is alive. I am ecstatic Saeyoung & Saeran got the reunion I had been hoping for (& in both endings!). The doctor part of me really wishes his treatment & recovery occurred in a hospital, instead of some nature tour with Jihyun while wearing Jedi robes, but beggars can’t be choosers in fiction, I suppose. I am glad Saeran is safe, recovering, had the time to heal his relationship with Jihyun, & is living with Saeyoung now. It’s what I wanted for him.

On one hand, I can see why Jihyun kept Saeran being alive a secret (Saeran wasn’t ready to see Saeyoung yet, he was detoxing, he needed more recovery time, he needed the peace away from everything, if Saeyoung knew he would have gone after them immediately rather than wait for some time to pass) but on the other hand, I had had enough of the secrets. I am glad though that the story allowed for Saeyoung to have some hope that Saeran was alive. If the narrative had left no suggestion of hope & Saeyoung had fallen into a depression of sorts, then I feel when Saeran was finally revealed he [Saeyoung] may have not handled it as well. But Saeyoung was given a chance to hope, to grow, to finally relax/settle where he was, & was allowed time himself to recover from everything that happened, which I think helped in how he received Saeran’s reappearance.

Definitive proof that Vanderwood has grown to care about Saeyoung as a person?! Sign me the fuck up. That was amazing. I greatly enjoy Vanderwood.

With Saeyoung, I did enjoy seeing his range of emotion & reactions to this entire ordeal. He was desvasted, broken, distraught, angry. My heart went out to him & I felt his pain. His monologues were great. His reactions felt real. It was a bit jarring to see how readily he was contemplating suicide & how quickly he cast that aside as soon as some other bit of info to cling to came along. I understand, though, that this story took place in a short amount of time & the creators were trying to portray his progression in the time they had. I am tickled that he was offered a 10 year contract with C&R & that he readily accepted. I have enjoyed seeing him begin to accept that he can plant roots somewhere, open up to those around him, & not fear that he’ll one day have to leave.

I was originally miffed that Jihyun went off for two years on his own, seemingly to get over Rika, making MC wait around, before he could commit himself to MC. Knowing now that those two years were actually spent helping to rehabilitate Saeran in seclusion, I am assuaged. A bit.

I am, however, left feeling as though maybe MC isn’t meant to be with Jihyun. I’ve certainly felt as if there is more push to have Jihyun x Rika remain together as Cheritz still doesn’t give, what I would consider, adequate bonding & development between Jihyun x MC (not that 11 days of story in any of the routes could be described as adequate bonding time, lolol). Majority of Jihyun’s scenes (in his route) are about him reminiscing about his past with Rika, rather than discussions that may cultivation a budding relationship with MC. I like Jihyun, but it feels likes it’s been made intentionally hard to romance him. Maybe it was naive of me to hope we would get cute scenes of Jihyun & MC getting to know one another more, or be shown ways Jihyun made it up to MC for being gone for so long, or even a mini date story, or actually seeing the proposal happen, or even a kiss? But I did hope for all of that, so I can’t pretend I’m not sad we didn’t getting to see it. The romance between Jihyun & MC feels brushed aside, like an afterthought, & I was hoping that this After End would finally put it at the forefront of the story told.

While I don’t like how the situation with Rika was handled in either route, & while this After End was not at all what I was expecting (I just wanted to kiss Jihyun, omg), it wasn’t a total loss for me since the twins are reunited & happy, which I think may have been my biggest wish. The voice acting as phenomenal & I can tell how much time & effort Cheritz put into creating this mammoth, complex & thought-provoking story. I’ll be honest & admit that I am upset I spent so many hourglasses for content that seemed packaged as Jihyun content but turned out to be more about Rika, but nothing can be done about that now.

If I had to pick an ending I preferred, it would definitely be the Forgive End, as there is more happiness for everyone I care about when it concludes. It was nice seeing Jihyun & MC have their little family, even if it was a very brief interaction. Their adoption of a little girl feels like a nod to Rika, of sorts. Perhaps that isn’t what Cheritz intended, & maybe there is no hidden meaning to why they adopted at all, but I am happy to see Jihyun & MC having brought a child into their home to create a family with.

The CGs are beautiful. Is there even a way to unlock the title page Jihyun proposal CG? I didn’t get it in my play-through at all.

I didn’t hate this After End, but I definitely didn’t love it either. I guess it kind of falls in a strange floaty grey middle area for me, somewhat flat. Hopefully many of y’all enjoyed it! I look forward to seeing what they may give us for Saeran’s After End. I have a feeling that may be a wild story too.

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wandlores · 5 years

Text

Spilled Ink

Pairing: Theodore Nott x Pansy Parkinson Words: 2,278 You can also read this on AO3. This is for the anon that sent a request in for this pairing MONTHS ago. I’m sorry it took so long to get to, but I hope you enjoy it. This is one of my favorite drabbles I have written in awhile.

Theodore Nott remembered the first time he ever saw Pansy Parkinson as clear as day. It was as though his mind was a library, and he would search every shelf and find a story about her. There was never in a time in his life where he didn't remember Pansy. She was his first memory; the first story he ever read and couldn't put down.

He was four years old. His mother was still alive and his father was still an asshole. He had to visit Charles Parkinson for official Death Eater business, though Theo had no idea at the time. Priscilla Parkinson greeted them at the front gates with Pansy in her arms. Her blue green eyes were the first thing he noticed; he even told his mother later that day that he thought they were so beautiful and unlike anything he had seen before. She smiled and told him he should tell Pansy that one day, because they would be seeing a lot of each other. That maybe it would make her happy. But Theo was always too shy, until his eleventh birthday right before they left for Hogwarts.

They were lying down in the field behind his family's estate. The sun was setting and the warm summer breeze was blowing thru her recently chopped off hair. Pansy was still five inches shorter than him and had her crooked teeth, but every time she looked into his eyes, he got distracted by the colors in her's. She was laughing about something he had said and turned her head to face him as he said his next words. He had planned to say something sarcastic about Draco Malfoy and how her parent's were already arranging their marriage, but instead, his subconscious thoughts spilled onto the grass like the ink on the pages he loved so very much.

"You have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen," he told her, "Have I mentioned that before?"

But she didn't take him seriously. They were only eleven years old. She snorted and playfully bumped his shoulder and told him to knock it off. He never complimented her like that again until they were fourteen and Draco yelled at her at the Yule Ball in front of everyone. She had run out of the Great Hall trying to hold back her tears, but Theo could sense her vulnerability from a mile away when others could not. She had told off Draco for his insolence before she turned and run away from the others. God forbid, she could never show her true emotions. She was much like him with how they were raised. It was only his mother who ever encouraged them to show emotions like every other kid, but she was long gone now. She had been long gone for a year at that point. Death was never fair.

Theo remembered telling Tracey he would be right back as he dipped out of the Great Hall. He knew instantly where she would go; it was their favorite place. A secret small cave by the lake that no one else had ever found. They could hardly fit in it anymore, but that didn't stop them from trying. They liked to pretend they were still eleven years old after their sorting when they found it.

Her pink dress was soaked from the snow falling around them, and her enchanted-on makeup was running down her face. Black smudges were around her eyes, but they still shined bright in the night light. Theo tried not to stare into them for too long.

"I-I'm so stupid," Pansy choked out, "I'm a jealous petty girl. He barely looked at Daphne and I-"

Theo sat down next to her as she fell into his arms. As the snow fell, he covered her up with his cloak and let her cry. He remembered that being the first time he ever felt like beating someone up for her, and Theo never had violent tendencies toward anyone. He couldn't understand why Draco would even look at Daphne with Pansy in the room, for she was all he could ever see.

"You're not stupid," he told her, "You're the smartest person I know, and the most beautiful, too."

She gave him a small smile as she cried, but he still held her. He held her for what felt like hours.

He never told Pansy he went and talked to Draco later that night and threatened that if he ever hurt her again, there would be consequences. Draco never tested Theo after that either. There was a secret understanding between them when it came to Pansy.

Then there was their first fight when they were fifteen. It was over their fathers'. Theo refused to see his any longer, and Pansy was trying to convince him otherwise to continue the Death Eater legacy. He made his decision a long time ago, even before he knew he had made it. It was written in history. It wasn't until later on that Theo realized she only fought so hard for him to be involved so she wouldn't lose him. He was the only stable thing in her life, with her vacant father and abusive mother. They made up a day later when Theo found her crying in the corner of the library. Not a word was spoken, but she fell into his arms and he closed his eyes trying to memorize the feeling of having her back. He would never lose her again. He swore that to himself again and again.

When they were sixteen, Theo's father came after him. He had been living with Blaise, whose mother was gone just as much as his dead one. It was as though she didn't exist. But his father came bursting thru the Zabini Estate's front gates threatened to kill him if he did not initiate himself with the Death Eaters, but it was Pansy who came and saved him. She cursed and hexed his father until he left and never returned. That was the first night Theo ever cried in her arms. He had always been her rock, but she had become his.

And now that Pansy was engaged to Draco Malfoy after the war, he couldn't handle it. Not when she was supposed to be with him. Not when they fought through everything together. You were supposed to marry your rock; the person who kept you grounded and allowed you to be yourself. He knew Draco never loved her; he never had in the way that Theo had. Their upcoming marriage was strictly political, even after everything that happened during the war.

It took all his courage as he slipped thru her window at her estate that night. Her parents were now both dead and it was all her's, but he had done this many times before. It felt natural to him, but Pansy didn't expect it that night.

She woke up suddenly to the sound of him closing her window, and she instantly grabbed her wand.

"Lumos," she whispered.

When she saw it was him, he watched her exhale. She put her hand to her chest and that's when he saw the ring. He swallowed down the lump in his throat.

"Theo, what are you doing here so late? Why didn't you owl me?"

He moved to sit next to her on her bed and avoided looking into her eyes until he composed himself. He could feel her staring at him with concern, and she gently put her hand on his shoulder to comfort him. He took a deep breath and bravely looked into her eyes. The eyes he remembered from all those years ago; the first thing he ever thought was beautiful.

"I-I came here to talk to you about Draco," he said calmly.

"Is everything okay?" She asked worriedly, "Did something happen to him? The trial was supposed to go well-"

"Oh, he is fine," he reassured her quickly, "Don't worry about him. This has more to do with me than him."

Perplexed, she lifted up her right brow and scooted closer to him on the bed.

"Then what is it?"

He closed his eyes as he contemplated on what to exactly say, but these words were already written in history. Just like all his decisions before. They were on the pages of the novels his destiny already wrote for him. This was his path, and this was his story. It was their story; he just wasn't sure how it was going to end.

"I've been in love with you my entire life," he said, "Ever since the first day I met you."

Speechless, Theo heard her sharply intake her next breath. She moved her hand that was on his shoulder onto her lap, and he watched as she looked down at the floor. He could see tears forming in the corner of her eyes, but she pushed them back. It was the first time in years she wouldn't cry in front of him. She locked her jaw as she tried to keep it together.

"Why-why didn't you tell me sooner?" She asked him, "Why are you waiting until now?"

"Because I tried to be selfless," he whispered, more to himself than her, "But I am not selfless, Pansy. I'm selfish. I want you, and I need you, and I can't lose you. If you marry him, my whole purpose will be-"

He didn't finish his statement, but suddenly he felt her grab his hand. She was rubbing his knuckles softly with the pad of her thumb. She wasn't looking up at him, but she whispered back, "You are selfless. I am selfish for not seeing earlier and not realizing. If I had known-"

"If you had known, then what?"

"Then things would be different, but it's too late now."

Without his permission, he felt a tear slip down his cheek, and he felt her wipe it away. He couldn't look at her, he wouldn't. He knew he would be trapped in the page of this story forever if he did.

"I'm sorry," she told him quietly, "I'm sorry."

He nodded to nobody but himself as he stood up. He didn't look back at her as he climbed thru her window and out into the night, but he heard her quiet sobs as he shut her window.

Theo didn't leave his estate for weeks. Now that his father was also dead, he had the place with himself. He never minded being alone before, but now all he could hear were the ghosts of his past and the spirits of what could have been of his future if he had acted sooner.

He couldn't take it anymore and did something stupid. He went back to the field where they were those many years ago when he first tried to express his feelings in his own way. No eleven year old would say that to his best friend, he thought, she was so naive. But he was so naive to think that she would even notice that fact at eleven, too. He was mad at her, but he was also mad at himself. Why had he waited?

He sat down in the grass and brought his knees up to his chest. He put his head on his knees and cried. He cried for his mother, he cried for the father he could have had, he cried for Pansy, he cried for all that he had lost. He could have been crying for hours. He had no idea, but then he suddenly felt a gentle hand on his shoulder.

He knew his face was lined with tears and his eyes had to be red, but he looked up anyway. For once, he didn't care who saw him that way. Theo was surprised to see that it was Pansy. She looked down at him with those eyes he saw every time he shut his own. They were full of love, loss, and regret. She didn't say anything as she sat down and took his hand, and that's when he realized Draco's ring no longer occupied her left ring finger. He rubbed her left hand soothingly and looked up at the sunset ahead of them.

"What happened?" He asked her quietly, "What did he do?"

"He did nothing," she responded quickly, "I just decided on a different path. A path that was written here in this field so many years before."

Theo turned his head to look into her eyes once again. She cupped his face with her hands as she told him, "I remember. I remember the day you told me my eyes were the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. Do you remember that?"

"Yes," he answered quietly, "How could I forget?"

"I was so stupid to not see-"

"We were eleven."

"But we have never been eleven at heart. We are old souls, you and I."

He smiled slightly as he studied her face. Her teeth were no longer crooked, but her eyes were the same. Her hair was long and flowing, and she had grown up into the soul she had always been.

"I love you too," she suddenly said, "I should have said it back."

He nodded, but not to himself this time, but to her. Then he did something he had been waiting to do since that day in the field so many years ago. He kissed her, and she kissed him back. And if the universe was fair, their story would just end here, because nothing would ever get better than this. Theo wanted his story to begin and end with Pansy Parkinson. It was written in the stars.

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hellreads · 5 years

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Chapters: 8/8 Fandom: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Kim Namjoon | Rap Monster/Reader Characters: Kim Namjoon | Rap Monster Additional Tags: Angst, Romance, Drama, Fluff, Smut, Slow Burn

Summary:

You are betrothed to Kim Namjoon, the heir of a real estate mogul. To say that it was a fairytale romance would be erroneous. You’re instead loped in the sad tale of the rich and melancholy.

I am lost for words once again, this is such a beautifully written story, I have immersed once again into the role of a beautifully awkward woman who’s betrothed to Kim Namjoon.

what is love? how do you know it’s love? how do you know you’re in love? those were the questions I asked myself while reading this and wondering if all of this was worth it because I am fully aware of how beautiful love is, it’s one of the best feelings one could ever have, but it can also crush your heart to pieces because when you love someone you can’t just choose happiness then leave when you feel like everything’s too much, you have to take everything in, face the beautiful melody and the eerily haunting ones too and I applaud our MC here for loving with all her heart even if it’s painfully obvious that she got the short end of the stick and has to work her way to the top in order for things to work because even if all of this was just a farce she wanted to try, she wanted this to work because she wants to love and be loved.

I applaud op for writing such an amazing story her inspiration to write it made it hurt more because I have seen What Happened in Bali when it was released but I was too young back then to understand the dynamics of their relationship all I know was Jo In Sung was my type hjsdfgjsgdfjksd anyway be informed that this is a slow burn story if you can’t handle too much tension and build-up you might find this bland at first but you really should give it a read (especially if you’re after the smut because it’s worth the wait I promise) op made sure we know everyone’s backstory, I’m satisfied she chose that path in unraveling this equally beautiful and heartbreaking story, to be in MC’s shoes I would lose my mind, I’m a creature made to love so if I’d be set-up to marry someone for money, I won’t have the heart to fight my parents so just like her I would try, but with their set-up, Namjoon obviously just an empty shell drained by his former love who still owned his heart is painful, how can you try when his heart belongs to someone else? it’s frustrating and I would walk away just keep up the act for the press and leave once the contract expires.

the characters here are written as if they actually exist as if this was based on true events, tbh I hated all of them at some point even the MC (but my love for her was greater so I won’t elaborate on that one), but I’m starting (I'll be talking as if she was actually me because I literally absorbed and immersed all of her beautiful fucking pain) with the person I hated the most aka Namjoon, you literally crushed me and my hopes in some parts baby, it kinda hurt seeing photos of you in my dash after reading those parts that made me hate bits and pieces of you, but what I hate the most is that I can’t dare to fucking hate you with all I have because you are you, it was a lost cause to even try because I was too immersed and I loved you too much to just fucking flip and walk away from you, though I did pray for you to suffer longer, but you have suffered long enough from women who kept on taking parts of you with them, I am here to pour all of me onto you and fill you with love and heal until you’re you again, the Namjoon that got whipped for me at some point, the Namjoon that whipped me, the Namjoon that fate bestowed upon me with a challenge, the Namjoon I learned to love and spend forever with. Sana, I hated you from the beginning until the end, you were you and I would never fill the hole you left in his heart, but did you really have to hurt me and smack to my face how immaculate you are? you have good intentions and you were mature and I’m nothing but a petty mess but this is me, I wanted to love him in hopes he’d learn to love me too but you keep getting in the way, tbh I never like the friendship you offered, nor the projects you were proposing, it was for a cause but I am petty insecure mess and I see you as a threat, I saw you as a sly snake who would bite me with venom if you fail to make me pliant to your requests, but I trusted Namjoon though it was uncomfortable (I’m not comfy with it because it happened to me before and I happen to have a shitty memory of it so I’m not willing to do it all over again) but op was right, she wrote you in a way people would find it hard to hate you, I felt that way but my petty side got the best of me. Chairman Kim Je-Dong, I hated you for taking Namjoon away from me when I still had no clue as to why it happened that way, and the moments interrupted but I love and respect you with all my heart father, because if it weren’t for your advice I wouldn’t be this happy, thank you. I think the rest of my hate-spree were petty lol, so I’ll stop here now.

what I’m trying to say is this story greatly affected me, I have never felt so livid and bursting with tears at a fictional argument, it freakin’ ripped my heart to shreds, I was a crying mess during the fight, I felt like this was it, it’s the end, but they just needed to be petty and take a break from each other, I only fully understood their pain as soon as MC started to retaliate, both have their valid points this is why they should’ve remained honest with each other, honest about digging his past, and knowing him thru that small gift and be honest and not make any promises you can’t keep for fucks sake their marriage is painfully accurate because it happens irl, men slaves to their work to make a living, women either work or take care of the house and kids if they have any, and not everyone has the time to address the issue until everything is falling apart, and irreparable. I have fallen head over heels in love forgetting about the fact that this was all for show, they were a perfect match if you ask me, I keep getting butterflies in my stomach, they literally made me believe in the process of falling in love, it wasn’t rushed at all and their cute date moments made my heart combust, what more could I ask for? and when he knew that this was it god those moments crushed me and made me a really sad ball of floof covered in salty tears, all emotions were just so intense even the dramatic moments that tested me and probably everyone out, the hospital scene, the park scene, the villa scene, all of it making my heart hurt so much I cry. the smut took a while before we got what we all were thirsty for but it was so worth it, even if it dragged for quite some time I couldn’t complain because he did make up for it and it was all good.

in short this fic teaches us to be open, honest and loving, open your eyes and your heart for a new love, if you’ve been hurt before don’t close your doors happiness doesn’t happen once, sure somebody made you happy before but eventually had the heart to hurt you but your happiness doesn’t end there, let someone enter your life and make you feel happy once again. be honest and communicative about everything with your lover, talk about your feelings, your concerns, things about your day, food you ate, conversations you had, deals you closed, people you encountered, small talk matters in any relationship, hell you can even talk about potatoes and it would assure your lover you still care but never lie about anything because people can see through us especially when you love someone it’s much easier to decipher their emotions even if we don’t want to accept it if it’s not a pleasant one. be loving, don’t let your past harden your heart, love, again and again, and again if you must, because that’s probably the only salvation we’ll get in this hellhole. again op thank you for this masterpiece these words may not get to you but I hope wherever you are, you are doing good and know that you are amazing! | 🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒

#a:fringesofsanity #t:covenant #m:knj #ft:myg #g:angst #g:smut #g:fluff #g:drama #g:romance #series #au:arranged marriage #au:lovers #ao3 #🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒#the song recs here didn't hel at all because those tracks were once part of my sappy sad healing playlist lol #also mannequin really is perfect for this masterpiece #thank you for not hurting me all over again op #i mean i did hurt but not as painful as RoW because that is like the most accurate ending for any fic under the same genre #you did make sana hard to hate but it was totally easy for me to hate her -- probably because i'm reminded of someone lol

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7scorpion · 5 years

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Basically Arthur x Micah

Sorry guys i really wanted to write this fic but i got tired halfway thru because i started focusing on my oc a little bit... its kind of messy since i havent written in a while but its basically that

also i only post on tumblr mobile so im preemptively apologizing for the non read-more'd post

Rated R to be safe

Cowboy hatefic

"Talk to me Cowpoke." That old, not quite as southern accent hummed from above a dim oil lamp. Leaning shoulders onto the post of Arthur's tent, Micah set a downcast glance from the brim of his leather hat. Eyes searching the warm, glistening-- pathetic, 'brother' before him. He caught his own thoughts again. His wide, well used palms gripping the edge of his cot upon hearing his voice, strong, but still so ... entrancing?

"Now what? Can't you see I'm busy?" Curtly, Arthur shot back, accompanied by his most serious face.

A chuckle, or two, then Micah sighs again "Ain't you never heard of courtesy? I'm asking you to talk. You can't come back from a job in a huff, causin' a scene and NOT expect Dutch to send someone to check on 'ya" He lied.

Micah came to see Arthur on his own accord. Something always stirred him when Arthur was enraged. Wether it be his incessant comments causing it, or, some unfortunate crossing the big lug's path the wrong way. Micah's seen him shout until he was red in the face, and it sent shivers up his spine. It infuriated him, but he had never had a better orgasm in his life thinking about that deep reverberating shout. The way his lips pulled back over his teeth, his blue eyes lighting with impulsiveness, nearly feral. It was almost a bonus for Micah, knowing from the moment he touched himself to the thought, he had to wind Arthur up constantly. Just to hear that deep visceral sound again.

"Really. Dutch, sent YOU. Of all people, to discuss this with ME." Arthurs voice raising just in that little accusatory tone, had gotten Micah to swing up straight, locking eyes with Arthur. "Oh yeah, Cowpoke. Why? You tellin' me I'm not your favorite around here?" Thick sarcasm, the usual cadence out of Micah's lips as it peels into a grin. A disgusted grunt from Arthur is returned; rejection. It helps with the process, Micah tells himself.

Arthur stands from his cot, clothes unfold from his chest. Dark eyes lock on the little bit of chest hair peeking from Arthur's linen that drives Micah wild. There was something so dainty about him? Beautifully male. Micah stirs his hips again, adjusting his growing discomfort.

Arthur steps closer, eyes meet. Micah shoots his glance down for a moment, he cant stand it for long. Piercing eyes, sad, wonderful - Vile. He gives a low growl at Arthurs new position.

"Git on. I'm not dealing with your shit right now." The words fall out of Arthurs mouth with such certainty, and Micah disliked that.

Detouring around Arthur's pitiful excuse for a blockade, Micah steps to his cot feeling welcome to a seat.

"You think yer being funny? What do you want from me?" Arthur half pleaded, now standing over Micah as he was before, watching the rat bastard make himself comfortable. This was one of Micah's favorite angles to view his Cowpoke, with his strong jaw highlighted by the lamp. Thank the Lord he isn't married.

Micah shook his head. "Well, who do you think you are coming into camp like a bat out of hell?" Micah halfheartedly pitched back, as it was all he could think of.

Plain desperate to continue on. Still dazzled by the beads of sweat on Arthurs cheek. He watched his blue eyes roll like they were falling out of his head, so clearly over what Micah intended to 'pull'.

"Please, not now. I really don't have time for this." Arthur groaned, before collecting his gun belt from his chest. "I'm going for a ride, be gone when I'm back." With that, the younger cowboy sauntered to his horse and saddled up. To ride his stress away until sunset. Micah sat enraged. Utterly boiling. His plan turned, and it hasn't worked in weeks. This was his final attempt to get that sweet release from hearing Arthur raise his voice. Weeks had gone by and the man nearly seemed passive, Micah couldn't get a rise, not even out of himself. Micah left Arthurs tent dejected, he needed something new. Simple wordplay wasn't working anymore. Striding to the campfire, Micah mulled his plans and options, for him it was dire. He held his open palms over the fire, squat on a log, eyes glossed in thought. Oblivious to the negging of the stragglers at the evening fire. Nearly desperate for a piece of Arthur's emotion.

Hours feel like days. Sitting, waiting, checking of pocket watches. The sun had gone down nearly two hours ago. Revelers of the camp were loudly singing, mostly out of tune. Micah had sequestered himself as usual at a table, whittling to pass time. His final decision was simply, to try again. Maybe this time he would break the camels back and get a rise. A deep sigh. Relief at the thought of being able to feel it again. To himself, Micah hoped at least some of the campers would be asleep by that time. He lit a cigarette and took a deep drag, closing his eyes. Desperately trying to reconjure the image of Arthur in his mind. Shouting for his life. Wonderful, wild, absolutely intoxicating.

"Mister Bell." A familiar low, drawl, dripping with honey drifts through Micahs ear. Eyes open in a flash, and dart upwards to the source; his cowpoke walking past him, with a relaxed grin.

Waves of disappointment overtook Micah. Arthur was calm, his plans were ruined. Stunned silence was exchanged, Micah's eyes darted back to his cigarette. Moments passed in thought before the cigarette was thrust between his lips and pulled to the end, nearly burning his fingers. Micah tossed the ember laden paper to the ground and tailed after Arthur, blind from his disappointment turned rage.

Arthur stood in his tent, wiping his face of the few beads of sweat with his back turned. Unaware of Micah's steam whistle mouth coming up behind him.

"Who do you think you are coming up to me like that!" Micah shouts down at the other man, causing him to whip around on his boot heel. Arthur's face twisted to a look of confusion and offense, he wasn't even aware he'd done anything.

"What in the hell are you talking about?" Arthur argues, in a lower voice, noticing Hosea had laid down for the night a few feet away after joining the small festivities. Micah shoved Arthur forward with a strong right arm, extracting the wind from his chest for a moment. Just like that, Arthur's mood turned. He thrust his arms forward and shoved Micah down.

Trying to catch himself, Micah grasped for anything. The post, the table, then, the ties to Arthur's canvas tent and tumbled to the ground. They barely noticed the canvas had fallen around them before they continued to throw punches inside of Arthur's tent. There was a limit to this Cowpoke's patience and Micah was finding it every time.

"I don't have time for this!" Arthur shouts before landing his beautiful, horrible fist into Micah's face. He sat above Micah attempting to restrain him. "What in the hell is wrong with you?!" Strained shouting through gritted teeth. Upon hearing which, Micah needed to adjust his hips under Arthur to accommodate his new rise.

Noises of resistance, grunts and shouts ensued before Micah found an opening. Arthur slipped on Micah's hips and felt something jab him, for a moment he was sure he was stabbed. With a swift motion, Micah flipped his favorite cowpoke onto his back, a new angle. He'd never seen this perspective before, his Adam's apple so pronounced, cheekbones... that chest. Nearly losing his advantage staring into Arthur's flesh, he resettles firmly, pressing the young man's arms over his head. "Now tell me why you do this to me." Micah uttered words he never thought he would. He felt as though he exposed himself for what he was. Obsessed. "Oh, you just cant help yourself, sick bastard." Arthur mumbled through labored breath followed by a low breathy chuckle, his eyes now trained on Micah's pronounced member. It took less than a moment for Micah to return to earth from Arthur basically calling him a freak. Blood pumping and a deep stare, sweat beads forming, deep, deep breaths. Slower and slower.

Lips meet. Fast and sloppy. Arthur's exposed chest shines under his oil lamp, coarse dirty hands grasp and grab at him. "Get naked, pretty boy." Micah growled, crawling upwards and jerking Arthur to his feet by his open shirt. They couldn't keep their hands off each other to do that.

Kissing desperately, chest to chest, the warmth stimulating that little dead part of their soul for passion. Assisted undressing, hats tossed without a care, physical absorption into the act. The world disappeared around them as they fell to Arthur's cot.

Hand jar, petroleum creme. God's gift to horny cowboys without a woman in sight. In this case, horny cowboys with no interest in the women in sight. Much more consumed with seeing how the other reacts to their provided pleasure. Arthur let himself be laid out, and Micah take over. After all Dutch DID want him to start trusting him more.

Not a delicate touch was exchanged as Micah ferociously tore open Arthur's button down and Arthur tossed Micah's hat away. Micah wasted no time, stepping up quickly to undo his current partner's pants, yanking downward without a care. Arthur couldn't complain, he was still wrapped up in all the groping of his various erogenous zones.

He wasn't going to allow himself to be completely nude, after all this was just impulsive and quick. Arthur was also still dwelling on the possibility that someone might be so inclined as to check on them. Though, who really would want to find out the source of those sounds. Micah unstraps his pants, allowing them to fall below his knees, and Arthur's immediately thrown back into the moment.

"You like what you see, pretty boy?" Micah's dark smug chuckle rings in one ear and out the other as he stares at the younger man sat before his hips. Arthur wasn't a man who needed to ask what he had to do next, he coated his hand in the petroleum and got to work.

#rdr2 fic #micahxarthur #micah bell x arthur morgan #rdr fic #rdr2 fanfic #rdr fanfiction #rdr2 fanfiction #hi this fic is my first in a while and i like this pairing!#im just throwing it out there for content 💕#micah x arthur #micah/arthur #morbell

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eeshalaurel · 5 years

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Finding Home Within Me

I have learned to find Home within Me. I am ok Being me and with me, my identity is not tied to how my house looks or where it is. I have learned to find safety In my Being`ness, Safety and home In my breath and in being Present with me whatever the outer circumstances ~ ~ This Spirit and Light and Spark and Flame of God Light that Lives within this dear body shines and glows and is home to me. As I breathe into my heart and have even a notion to connect with this God Light, there Is Light. Always there is Light and it grows brighter as I breathe into my heart. And God said, let there be light, and there was and is Light. Va Yomer Elohim, Vaya hee Or, Vaya hee Or.

But my body has needs. This dear body that is still living here on this planet needs to be warm in the winter and able to get out of the heat in the summer time. This dear body that has kept on living through 50 years of Lupus, Systemic Lupus and two divorces, and family all rejecting me and a huge church family disowning me leaving a man who none of the elders in the church would even try to deal with. Leaving this man and such a nice house that I had papered and curtained and stained the wood and created a home for our family. When I left to get the children and me away from emotional abuse and disregard disgust - they could not deal with the tiny little house in a lower class neighborhood and with being with me while their dad was telling them that I was crazy, maybe I would get help. So they left and moved back into the nice house. That was probably the most devastating time of this life.. I was a Mother thru and thru. I loved being with me children each stage even the terrible twos with a baby. Friends in the church would talk of not being able to wait until their child could walk or go to preschool or to kindergarden - I would tell them...... ... .. No,

This Is the Perfect Time, this time is to be cherished each moment loving these precious little beings who still look at you as if you are their whole world and it is so amazing to see what new thing they discover every day. And they are so much fun most of the time. And it is so good to me their mother. Then was Then, Now is Now.. Now I am 70 years old. These beautiful children grew up and have their lives and act as if I do not exist. Tim will have nothing to do with me. No one gives me a reason. It is a great mystery. And Nancy is busy busy with her life and sends me a gift thru the mail Christmas and Mother's Day - this year beautiful roses in a box at the front door - they are lovely, I added greens from the bushes outside - and for my birthday. I get a short email reply sometimes. maybe once a year a little conversation on the phone of her telling me some things about her life and her job and avoiding anything about my life. I love them each so much every day, I see their heart lights and the good dear people they each are, and I love and cherish them.

But my body and my psyche has needs - and the continuing loss of my children in my life is like a part of me gone missing. My older brother wanted assurances that he would not have to come down here to handle anything when I am dead. I have my body donated to science when I pass on, so no one has to do or spend anything. The middle brother lives in a tiny place on his own on disability, a brilliant person ill equipped for being out in the world. I do not hear back form him, he is doing his best.

Little brother Robbie, such a light and kind sweet hearted being managed to make his way our of out disabling childhood and get trained to me a machinist and made good money and loved motorcycles and was excellent at dirt racing. He went on trips with friends to other places to ride their bikes on curing mountain roads. He was a favorite and a strength to this group for many many years until he could no longer find a medication to deal with his depression and kept missing work and lost his job. He found others but could not keep the so he sold the bikes and lost the community and sold his dear house and all most of his things and then his precious dog died and he moved into a little box of an apartment. He still could use his homemade gear shift and pedals and do online virtual racing from home.. He was very good and loved in this community. But the Television broke and he quit paying for a phone and ran out of money to pay the rent. He had applied for disability with no good results. So 5 years ago her ended his own life..

Fortunately, I was able to find a way to be at the crematorium with his body inside of a white box. I had been tuning in and not being able to connect with him to help him to come out of this trauma to help him cross over. I knew I had to be with his body. There was a sweet and kind man at the crematorium that gave me time alone with Rob. I brought an older helmet still at his apartment and his harmonica. I described the helmet to him and played a bit on his Homer Hamonica and told him how very much I love him. I told him that I totally understood why he did this and did not blame him. I told him his brothers were ok with it all too and that we all love him so much. I felt all the hairs my arms dance and my heart felt his presence there with me. then I intended and sensed my river of light from the heart of Gaia thru my heart Light and up to Source Light and then his river of light joining mine. I sensed and saw our maternal grandfather standing at the opening gates of heaven leaning out with his arms to call Robbie to him. There beside him jumping about was Baby the precious little black and white dog so excited to see his human again, Behind them standing there was my mother waiting for her youngest boy. All of Robbie's Presence and Soul zoomed up that column of Light and was Home. On one of the last mornings in his apartment, I awoke to see Robbie standing in a bright sunny wide space standing tall and confident and happy and looking at me with his eyes and heart with thanks and love. He let me know he is Home and safe and all is well. In my inner world I am so very safe and loved and at home. I have died several times and know what it feels like to be Me but outside of this body. OH it is so glorious~ just viscerally remembering that expansion and freedom not catches my breath. I am that I am a unique Being of Light and Love and Power.

I was so very happy to be out of this body after dealing with the pain and limitations and collapsings. The four shining beings around me who were very familiar to me told me that I had to go back into my body and to be here on the planet. I argued with them.. No way! I cannot continue to life like this. If you want me to say something Stephen right there by my body is good at channeling, he can channel me. I was told that my Soul plan and all I had gone thru had prepared me to Be Present on the planet at this time. They said it was essential for me to be Here in my Presence on Earth Now. And then I was re-entering this body. This does NOT Feel good at all.

Being out of my body and then having to come back into it happened another time several months later with 4 energy workers around my dead body being so annoyed at me for not letting them call the paramedics. I started back into form but it hurt so so so much that I popped back out to the four shining beings blocking my path to go Home. So I took a deep breath like before jumping into cold water and became corporeal again. these friends stayed annoyed at me and left me at the empty home I was staying in while one of their relatives was out of town. I recuperated enough to get my things together in my car and left to go and live out of my car in the woods at various places for the next two years. Living out of my car in the woods with bears and scary noises and no friends wanting to talk to be because it was too scary to think of me being a woman alone in the woods ~ I came to realize that I needed to find my safe place within me. This was September of 1995.

I stopped writing and got my box containing my journals from the years of being homeless. The box was way on top shelf in the back.. moving things, balancing stretching moving christmas boxes out of the way catching the edge of the box and pushing and pulling and it finally moves a bit. ( Oh were is my person or personal assistant :-) ) I go the box out without falling and opened it to find my journals from 1995 and 1996 into 1997 with the corresponding Mayan DreamSpell calendars. My first notebook telling of my journey starts with First Night. It reads rather nicely ~ hmmm ` this is not so bad. :-) Now my body has needs ~ to use my Thumper massager and pain ointment and helpful herbs and heating pad and lying down to rest from this. And so: the Realization of what may be an obstacle belief in me that could keep me from finding a good place to live that I sat down to share, will wait till another time. I close with shining Love and smiles to you whoever finds this and actually reads my rambling posts or at least this one. Thank you. I do not know if comments can be left here in Tumblr or if it shows how to contact me - probably things I need to set up somehow.. ( where is that personal assistant or one who loves and adores and cares for and helps me and is in return blessed and loved and adored ) I have done what I could for now and that must be good enough my dear BeLoveds Eesha Laurel 5,11,'19 @ 1:17 pm.

(this posted to Tumblr same day about 2:00 after finding some art to post above and below )

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hereiamhereigo · 6 years

Text

The Nanny Chapter 5

Chapter 5 [Harrison Osterfield X Reader]

Pairing: Harrison O x reader (Tom in a starring role)

Warnings: Cuss words (sorry, I ain’t no lady)

Plot: Y/N is the nanny for the Downey family. She loves her job and can’t wait to see what the future holds for her. Maybe a boy with breathtaking blue eyes?

Chapter 1| Chapter 2| Chapter 3| Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Shit. Shit shit shit shit. Is all Y/N kept thinking. Had Susan and Robert seen her talking to Tom and Harrison? Did they know she had their numbers? She immediately panicked and blocked both numbers and deleted their conversations out of her phones. She went one step even further- she changed their names in her phone. She tried to clean up her mess as much as possible.

Once she was completed with her task, she finally allowed her mind to catch up with what was happening- she nearly got fired and is now being accused of breaching her contract. She felt like she should just curl up and sleep forever. She also felt like she would never be able to sleep.

She felt so dumb, thinking that Susan and Robert would not be watching her every move. She knew she needed to just keep her head down and just do her job. However, she first needed to sleep.

3 AM

Well, I guess I am not sleeping Y/N thought bitterly as she got up. She decided to just start getting ready, taking her time. She would get everything ready, make a nice meal, etc. She slowly got ready, in no rush at all. Once she was completed, it was nearly 5, much too early to wake anyone up. She decided to go downstairs to the den and read a book she had been wanting to read for a while.

She curled up with her book and began to make her way thru the story. She had just gotten to a major plot twist when she heard someone coming down the stairs. Not knowing who it was, she quickly closed her book and sat up.

It was Robert who was up so early, moving around the kitchen to prepare his morning drink. The man did not seem to notice Y/N and she was trying to figure out how to get up without startling him.

“Good morning” she said, sitting in one of the chairs at the kitchens island.

“Good morning, how did you sleep?” He questioned.

“Like a baby” she said, not wanting anyone to worry about her.

“Aw yes. I remember when Avri used to get up at 3 am” Robert said, sending her a knowing look.

“Oh my. I am so sorry, I had no idea I was that loud” Y/N said, praying she did not wake up the entire family.

“You weren’t, I’m just a light sleeper” Robert said, taking along sip of his drink.

“I’m going to make breakfast, anything in particular you want?” Y/N said, heading to the refrigerator to see what she could use to make breakfast.

“You don’t have to make us anything, we can cook for ourselves” Robert said, looking out the window.

“Oh I know, I just wanted to do something nice” Y/N said, putting eggs in a bowl with some milk.

“You don’t have to, you do plenty already. Must be weird, watching the children of people who could do it themselves.”

“Sometimes, but I know you both are incredibly busy and you both have demanding careers.”

“Is that what the kids are calling it these days?” Robert sassed. Y/N simply laughed before popping some bacon into the pan. She then turned on the skillet to cook potatoes. “You really don’t have to cook for us. We have a chef that is on-call for us.”

“I know, but I need to do something, anything really. I need to keep going or I’m gonna crash.”

“That I understand, but seriously, relax okay? We aren’t going to turn around and fire you, we stand by our words” Y/N allowed herself to relax every so slightly with Robert’s words, but not enough to completely relax.

“Would you mind watching this Robert? I’m gonna go get both kids up” Y/N asking, indicating the cooking food in front of her.

“How about I got round up the squirts and you keep cooking? There’s a reason we have a chef- I am terrible at cooking” Robert said, letting out a laugh. Y/N chuckled along with him, giving the food her attention again.

“You have yourself a deal” Y/N said to Robert’s retreating form. She kept cooking the food, hearing the noise of the other three Downeys getting up.

Once the food was cooked, she began to plate enough for everyone, knowing that it was possible that Robert and Susan would not want any. Once she had the food prepared for the children, with ketchup for Avri and salsa for Exton.

She heard little feet come down the stairs and the squeals of children as they were being chased by Robert. Avri quickly ran to hide behind her, while Exton got caught by his father.

“Daddy no!!! Daddy put me down!” Exton cried, laughing the whole time.

“Daddy behave!” Avri yelled, laughing herself. Y/N helped get Avri settled while Robert and Exton continued to play.

Susan came downstairs, playful rolling her eyes and Robert’s and Exton’s antics. She quickly got herself a cup of coffee and sat down at her spot at the table. She began to eat, checking in on Avri.

“Robert, did the chef come by this morning? We could have done this ourselves.” Robert put Exton down in his spot at the table and took his own.

“Oh no, Y/N actually made this for us” Susan looked over at Y/N who was washing dishes.

“Really? This is quite good, maybe we have you for the wrong job” Y/N quickly dropped the dish she was washing in the sink. Robert’s head shot up, looking between the two women.

“Maybe you are right, but I love the job I have right now. Plus these two” She said, indicating Exton and Avri “make everything worth it” she said, sending a smile to the two children. She finished washing the last dish, leaving them out to dry. Y/N then began to get the bags she had ready towards the door.

“Thank you for making breakfast Y/N, you really did not have to” Robert said, prompting both Avri and Exton to say their thank yous to Y/N.

Once everyone was done, Y/N cleared off the table and loaded up the dishwasher. She then went upstairs to see what Avri and Exton were up to. Avri was grabbing her goods for the day, her favorite blanket and stuffed animals. She packed up most of it in her Avengers backpack (wonder who got that for her) and was trying to cram more coloring books in there.

“Silly girl, let me help you” Y/N said, helping re-pack everything Avri wanted for the day.

“Thank you Y/N. Can we watch more movies today?” Avri asked.

“Of course! Any movie you watch, we will watch and color in our coloring books today. Does that sound like a plan?”

“Yes! I am so excited! We are going to watch Mulan and Toy Story and Ariel and, uh whatever else I find!” Avri said, mentally planning their own day’s lineup. Y/N laughed at her antics, and went to go see if Exton had everything he needed for the tutor.

“Hey Bud, do you need any help?” Y/N said, watching the boy look around his room.

“I can’t find some of my homework, I worked on it last night with Dad” Exton said, lifting up everything in his path.

“Let me help you, what color folder does it go in?” Y/N said, scanning the room for the missing pages.

“Uhhh blue I think” Exton said. Y/N looked thoroughly through his backpack, finding the missing blue folder. Exton had a sigh of relief, quickly finishing his preparations.

Another day, another near miss Y/N thought to herself and everyone quickly headed downstairs and into the car.

Once they got to the set, Y/N took Exton over to the tutor’s building, leaving him for the day. Y/N was walking back to the Downey’s trailer when she heard the undeniable sound of a dog squeaky toy. When she turned to enter the trailer, she saw Avri playing with Tessa. Y/N sighed, knowing exactly who would be around, waiting to talk to her. God, could they seriously just leave me be? She thought and she held her head high and came around the corner. As she went to go grab Avri and go inside the trailer, she heard Harrison laughing at whatever antics Avri was pulling.

“Y/N look who came to visit!” Avri cried, showing off Tessa.

“I see that Avri, but I believe we have a Disney movie day, so we better head back inside.” Avri groaned, not wanting to leave the dog. She turned and gave Y/N her best puppy dog eyes.

“Alright fine, we can stay out for a bit, but you need sunblock chick” Y/N said, one hand already on the handle of the door leading into the trailer.

“Can I talk to you real quick?” Harrison asked, making Y/N immediately put her head down in annoyance.

“Actually no, I don’t think that is a good idea” Y/N yanked open the trailer door, closing it firmly behind her. She hoped that when she got outside that Harrison was gone, but she knew the chances of that were slim. She located the sunblock and headed back outside, knowing that Harrison was probably waiting just out the door for her.

She headed back outside, fully intended to ignore Harrison if he was there. Much to her relief, he was not there. She walked over to Avri and got her covered in sunblock, taking the time to put some on herself. Y/N then walked over to one of the lawn chairs sitting outside the trailer, making herself comfortable. She watched Avri play with Tessa, but she did not see anyone else in sight, including Tom. She thought it was odd, but maybe he and Harrison had been called to set.

Avri played with Tessa for quite a while, until Avri began to tired, along with Tessa. Y/N was not sure if she could bring Tessa into the trailer with her. She decided to just put Avri down for her nap before trying to find either Tom or Harrison. Once Avri was tucked in, baby monitor in hand, Y/N set off to quickly drop Tessa off.

It did not take her long to find Tom, as he was hanging outside his trailer. Y/N walked up, trying to think of all the ways she could handle this. She did not really trust herself to speak, so choose to just walk up with Tessa by her side. To her credit, Tessa silently followed Y/N wherever she went.

Tom looked up when Tessa came over to him, petting her and she sat down next to him.

“Thank you for bringing her back, I was about to come looking for her.”

“Absolutely no problem, she definitely helped knock Avri out for an early nap” Y/N said, turning around and walking away.

“Wait, Y/N” Y/N felt like Ella Enchanted, following their every command.

“Yes Tom? I need to head back, I am on probation after all.” Tom winced, knowing he was the cause of her stress.

“I just wanted to say I am sorry. I had no idea Robert was right there, and I definitely should have looked. I cannot tell you how sorry I am, but did you block our numbers? We tried calling you, but neither of us could get through.”

“Uh, sorry. I just needed to give my phone to break and snapped so I blocked a bunch of numbers. I am so sorry. I need to get back” as Y/N finished her last sentence, she had already began to head back.

She got back in just as Avri was waking up, stating that she was hungry. Y/N realized she was hungry as well, and began to make them lunch from what was in the trailer. Avri seemed content with what Y/N whipped up. They ate lunch and then curled up to watch a Disney movie. Avri chose, watching the movie while Y/N stared at her phone. If I changed their names, should I unblock their numbers? Realizing she had not updated her best friend since the day before, she sent an update text, seeing if she could get some advice.

She focused on the movie and Avri for the most part, checking her phone every once in a while. Her sister was texting her, letting her know about the college life.

Y/N always felt a pang of jealousy about college- her sister got a scholarship to go and Y/N never did, forcing her to leave her dreams in the dust. She tried to never hold it against her baby sister, but sometimes it was hard. She had always dreamt of going to college, getting her degree. However, she worked too many hours in high school and it caused her grades to slide. She never got a scholarship and could never afford to cover both the household bills and college tuition. She simply accepted it as a fact of life- she would never be a college graduate.

She was snapped out of her thoughts by Avri curling in her. Avri loves to cuddle, it was definitely a pastime for her. Y/N loved that Avri cuddled, since Exton was at the age where that was too babyish for him. Y/N rolled her eyes every time the little boy said it to her.

Y/N looked down at her phone, seeing a text from her best friend.

You need to call me! This is so crazy to hear! How did it get so crazy so fast?

There was a second text

Also, your bosses gave you a second chance, I think you should give those two hotties another chance ;)

Y/N chuckled, knowing her best friend was right about everything. Leaving the names as there were in her phone Jon Snow for Tom and Peter Pan for Harrison, Y/N unblocked both numbers, making sure her phone was on silent.

As expected, her screen blew up with texts and calls from both of them. She quickly deleted the missed calls, choosing to listen to the voicemails later. She texted her best friend back.

Alright alright, I unblocked them. My phone blew up, but it got done. To be honest, I’m not sure how everything blew up. I’m just so thankful I did not get fired. That would have been a real disaster. Should I text them back and let them know I unblocked them? I am definitely out of my league here.

While she was waiting for a response, Robert came into the trailer to relax for a bit. Robert has his own trailer in the so called Downey-Town, but he still liked to come in and relax with Avri.

“I see we are watching yet another classic movie here?” Robert asked, looking at the movie playing on the screen.

“She is quite passionate about her Disney movies” Y/N responded, indicating Avri in her lap. Avri was still curled up, taking a bit of a cat nap by the look of things.

“How are things today?”

“Good, Exton is at the tutor, we hung out with Tessa for a bit. Avri and I have already had lunch, but there is some leftover in the fridge if you would like some”

“Oh I’m good. I’m having lunch with Evans and Susan today. I just wanted to see what you were ladies were up to. When she wakes up, can you bring her over? We are having a long lunch.”

“Of course, she took a nap earlier, so I won’t let her sleep for more than another twenty minutes.”

“I will see you then. Can you also pick up Exton today? I think he will will be done when I am still on set.”

“Of course, and I will help him with his homework. He should not have too much today, we did a lot of his homework yesterday.”

“Thank you and I will see you in a bit” Robert said, as he walked out the trailer, closing the door behind him.

Y/N checked her phone for a message from her best friend, but there was no reply yet. However, she did continue to text with her sister. Her sister was going to be graduating soon and was thinking about moving back home for a bit while she found a job. Her sister wanted to be a veterinary assistance, so there would be some internships still needed to be done. Y/N did not know if her sister moving back home would be a good idea- she might get comfortable and never leave. It was however, not her choice, it was her sister’s, and she needed to respect whatever her sister chose to do.

She allowed her thoughts to drift until the movie ended and she realized she needed to wake up Avri. She gently nudged Avri until she woke up. Once Avri was up, Y/N got her over to where Robert and Susan were. She put Avri down, allowing her to roam around the area. Avri immediately ran over to her father, crawling up into his lap. She went down and placed down the bag she had packed for Avri, including some snacks and Avri’s coloring books.

“How are you doing little lady?” Robert said to Avri.

“I’m good Papa. I took a long nap today and I got to play with Tessa!”

“I heard, how was that?” Robert said, bouncing Avri in his lap.

“She made me so tired, I think she had to take a nap” Avri said, making the adults around her laugh.

“Y/N, do you think she woke up yet?” Avri asked Y/N.

“Oh I’m sure Avri. I’m not sure how long of a nap a dog would take” Y/N answered her.

“Well can we go see? I want to play again! Everyone else is in school!” Avri cried, clearly getting a bit bored of the adults around her. Y/N looked at her phone, noticing the time.

“How about you come with me to get your brother instead? Then you will have someone to play with” Y/N counter offered. Avri puffed her cheeks, debating her choice.

“I guess. Can I take a dolly with me?” She asked, already heading to her bag.

“Of course! We can head over there once you choose” Y/N knew Avri was going to take her time choosing her doll, as Avri saw this as serious business.

Once Avri choose a doll, Y/N grabbed her hand and then headed to go get Exton. Exton sometimes stayed later than the other kids to get help, but Y/N had not received a text letting her know that he wanted to stay.

Once they got to the trailer, Exton spotted them and walked right over. He had his backpack over his shoulder and some papers in his hands.

“Can you help me study for this?” Exton said, handing the paperwork over to Y/N to look over. She looked it over, seeing it was for a spelling bee. Verbal spelling had not been Exton’s strong point- the boy got nervous, stumbled and said the wrong letters.

“Of course darling. We shall practice over and over after your other work is done. Do you have much to do tonight?”

“Not much, I did most of it during our break.”

“Exton, I thought we talked about, you gotta take a break, and enjoy your break. Homework is for where again?” Y/N quizzed him. Exton rolled his eyes, not the first time he has gotten this lesson.

“Home, I know, but I just don’t really get along with the other kids” Exton was just not really clicking with the other kids. It was not that he was too mature or immature, they just did not have much in common.

“Well alright, as long as you are trying. Let’s go see what your Dad is up to” Y/N said, grabbing both of the kids’ hands.

Once they got back to “Downey Town” they found Robert sitting in the sunshine with Susan in his lap. They just seemed to be enjoying a quiet moment. Or they were.

“MAMA! DADDY!” Avri shrieked as she ran right towards them, dragging both Y/N and Exton with her. “Exton and I are going to play, so you can play with Y/N. Bye!” Avri said, dragging Exton off to where her toys were. Avri loved Exton, and Exton felt the same about his little sister.

“She definitely missed him today” Y/N said turning to the Downeys.

“Yes, she does. We are thinking about starting her in school next year, even though it might be a bit early” Y/N paused at this. If Avri went to school, her hours would definitely be cut, and she may even be fired. Before she could spiral Robert finished his thought. “However, we haven’t decided. We might just put her in one of those two-hour a day daycare systems instead. What do you think?” Robert said, looking at Y/N. Y/N paused, wanting to be honest, but also keep her job.

“I think a full day of school would be way too much for her, I think a shorter day would be better for now. Once she gets used to even a half day, that would make the transition much much smoother for her.”

“We still a lot to think about” Susan added, sending Robert a look. Clearly Robert has mentioned something he should not have.

“We were thinking about having some friends over tonight. Does that sound okay?” Robert said, as though Y/N lived in the house as a member of the family, not a part of the payroll.

“Of course, I’ll keep the kids upstairs.”

“Not necessary, Ruffalo and Hemsworth will be bringing over their kids. You up to helping with them?” This would not be the first time that Y/N had watched others’ kids, and for the most part, everyone’s children were really well behaved.

“Yes, they are super easy to handle. Of course.”

“Wonderful, everyone will be over around seven. Can you make sure the kids are ready by then? I am not sure what time we will be done, but the kids can pass out in the guests rooms.”

“Yeah of course. I will set up the movie room and everything. I will have to pull out the games as well” With Y/N’s answer, Robert looked over at Susan, who had been quiet during this whole interaction.

“Told you everything was going to go just fine!”

End of Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Tag List is OPEN!

Tags: @spider-mendes @rsublett @multifandomlove2002 @the-claire-bitch-project @hazismyboo @lyssilinn-marvel

#the nanny #harrison osterfield #harrison osterfield x reader #tom holland

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junker-town · 3 years

Text

Anti-vaxxers are getting way too much say in NBA Covid protocols

Set Number: X163652 TK1

The majority of the NBA is vaccinated, so why is the anti-vaxx minority calling the shots?

Every sports league has had to find ways to deal with trying to run professional sports in the middle of global pandemic. Concessions have been made, plans altered — all in service of trying to keep games going while ensuring players and fans are protected. Intelligence prevailed when the the NFL and NFLPA eventually found common ground on a way to proceed in 2021. Now the NBA is in the midst of its own negotiations, and the league is on the verge of collapse because of it.

There is no point trying to mince words on the issue or dance around what’s happening. NBAPA vice president Kyrie Irving, who has always had a penchant for conspiracy theories, is now in a position of power in helping decide the biggest health issue the league has ever faced. While an estimated 90 percent of the league has been vaccinated, a loud, anti-vaxx cabal is using the NBA/NBAPA negotiations as a soap box to peddle their misinformation, and nobody is stepping in to stop it.

On August 7 an NBAPA meeting was held to discuss the league’s desire to have players reach 100 percent vaccination by the start of the NBA season. It was an important topic the union needed to discuss, but was met with a widespread unwillingness to even talk about the issue. According to a piece by Matt Sullivan in Rolling Stone, while the majority of NBA players who have not yet been vaccinated are guided by misplaced skepticism, a small, but vocal minority of anti-vaxx conspiracy theorists are railroading proceedings by killing conversations.

As NBA media days started this week, Irving was among those dancing around the topic of vaccination when asked directly is simply an effort to preserve his public image. Instead of accepting the damage he’s doing, Irving is touting the “personal choice” line, which has been repeated ad nauseam by vaccine skeptics as justification not to get the jab. Overwhelming scientific evidence indicates that choosing not to be vaccinated is a societal choice, not a personal one — because of the myriad ways it impacts those around us.

Meanwhile Bradley Beal is out here peddling the notion that NBA players are getting sick from the vaccine, despite there being absolutely zero evidence of that being the case.

Bradley Beal on his bout with COVID-19, which cost him the Olympics: "I didn’t get sick at all. I lost my smell. That’s it.” Beal adds that no one will talk about adverse reactions to the vaccine and how it impacts player health. No NBA player has missed time due to the vaccine.

— Ben Rohrbach (@brohrbach) September 27, 2021

On the plus side, Beal can’t smell his own bullshit.

A recent tactic by the anti-vaxx contingent has been to try and seek religious exemption as a means to avoid getting vaccinated. Andrew Wiggins was denied vaccine exemption from the NBA on Friday, meaning he needs to either comply with orders mandated by the San Francisco Department of Health, or not play in any home games this season.

The NBA has announced the following: pic.twitter.com/6t1spKMU35

— NBA Communications (@NBAPR) September 24, 2021

A similar provision in New York City will prevent Irving from playing in Brooklyn this season, and there’s no evidence he plans to get the shot.

Jonathan Isaac of the Magic, one of the players who chose to stand during the national anthem inside the NBA bubble and not side with players supporting the Black Lives Matter movement, is also vehemently against vaccination, citing his religious beliefs as a key factor. He told Rolling Stone:

“If you are vaccinated, in other places you still have to wear the mask regardless. It’s like, ‘OK, then what is the mask necessarily for?’” Isaac continues. “And if Kyrie says that from his position of his executive power in the NBPA, then kudos to him.”

Let’s be abundantly clear: Wearing masks is not some huge hidden secret warranting discussion. This is not Scooby and the gang zooming around in the Mystery Machine to solve another groovy mystery. The topic of masks has been discussed, again, and again, and again since the pandemic began. Saluting someone for “asking the tough questions” is simply acknowledging that you have done ZERO research on the topic.

Vaccinated individuals can still spread Covid

The more Covid spreads the greater chance of mutation into more harmful variants that vaccines may not offer protection against

Children who can’t be vaccinated and those who are immunocompromised deserve consideration and care, making masks the bare minimum society can do to help protect them

Isaac’s choice is to ignore science and put his faith in God. He has every right to do that. That right does not extend to allow him to play in the NBA with any impact on his career. Furthermore, invoking religion as a defense is a particularly insidious rhetorical technique that positions religion and science is oppositional forces. This is something that particularly frustrated Enes Kanter, who is a devout Muslim and also in favor of players being forced to be vaccinated.

“If a guy’s not getting vaccinated because of his religion, I feel like we are in a time where the religion and science has to go to together,” he tells RS. “I’ve talked to a lot of religious guys — I’m like: ‘It saves people’s lives, so what is more important than that?’”

Kanter plays for the Celtics, a franchise intimately aware of the risks of Covid. Celtics forward Jayson Tatum, a 23-year-old with no prior health conditions, is still experiencing “long Covid” symptoms requiring him to use an inhaler before games, this despite contracting the virus in January of 2021.

Karl-Anthony Towns, another healthy, elite athlete who already had to deal with the tragedy of losing his mother to the virus, told Sports Illustrated that he lost 50 pounds after contracting Covid himself. Now players like Towns and Tatum, ravaged by the virus, are forced to sit back while decisions are being made by the least-knowledgeable people.

The fight is taking front stage in the NBA, but the concern is that the sensible voices are not the loudest. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar is doing his part, explaining why it’s so critical that current superstars lead the charge to combat the public health crisis.

“Which is why it’s so shocking and disappointing to see so many people, especially people of color, treat the vaccination like it’s just a matter of personal preference, like ordering no onions on your burger at a drive-thru. While I can understand the vaccine hesitancy of those who have been historically marginalized and even abused by the health care system, enough scientific documentation has been given to the public to set that past behind us for now. Yes, we should never forget. Those experiences should sharpen our critical thinking to not accept things blindly. But it doesn’t mean we reject things blindly. The drowning man doesn’t ask if a racist made the life preserver keeping him afloat, only that it works to save his life.”

Kareem went on to say that “those who claim they need to do “more research” are simply announcing they have done no research.” To take this a step further, I would add that people who want to do “more research” are specifically waiting for something, anything to support their biases, regardless of whether it’s intelligent or not.

That’s how we reach the point where numerous vetted, supported medical journals are thrown out in favor of one, which has not been corroborated, but supports an opposing view. It’s how hundreds of millions of vaccinated individuals who have had zero complications are ignored in favor of one person saying their cousin’s best friend’s daughter’s mail carrier died after getting the vaccine. It’s how Dr. Fauci and dozens of other respected virologists are branded as “liars.”

There is no doubt this is a supremely difficult situation. It is not right to ignore the concerns of people of color when they talk about trusting a government, which for generations has established a pattern of abhorrant behavior designed to put their needs last. However, there has to be an intelligent way to broach this topic that doesn’t involve outwardly rejecting any vaccine mandate, while siding with beyond ludicrous conspiracy theories. We can have the discussions, like Kareem is trying to, where we address this distrust, but also champion saving lives.

Unfortunately as it stands it’s a question of whose voice is the loudest, and sensible people like Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Jayson Tatum, Karl-Anthony Towns and Enes Kanter are being drowned out by uninformed, unintelligent stupidity. The NBA and the NBAPA need to do more, and do better — and not accept that inaction is the path forward.

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neo-shitty · 3 years

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toffee!

no dont apologise! i didnt check until just then so np :)

mmm yeah it is a bit trippy. hehe ITS TRUE THO. yeah sadly i think ur right, and tag blocking is probably a good idea. sometimes smut written well or not in excess is okay but goddamn when its abt 01 line and thats the whole fic... *silently blocks tags*

hehe i do that all the time lol this conversation is carrying on threads from a month ago :) mmm yeah ur probably right sadly, same. HA HE DIDNT HAVE A CHOICE and now i have someone to talk to abt them, so thats good! I KNOW felix was actually the one who got me into skz with his iconique gods menu line so i guess i have a soft spot for him. i always tell myself my bias is chan but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ guess im more whipped than id like to admit. mmm yeah that does make sense dw i hope they do that as well. YES king seungmin hIMSELF. GODDAMNIT DONT GET ME STARTED ON MINHO IN GODS MENU I DIDNT EVEN KNOW HE WAS PART OF THE GROUP UNTIL I STARTED GETTING MORE INTO THEM. BITCH (affectionate) THE LINE DISTRIBUTION HAS BEEN UTTER DOG SHIT but *deep breath* its better now so were moving on adn hoping it stays that way. sis same but i may or may not have gone thru a rlly depressed phase and actively sought out the elimination episodes so i could actually force some tears out of my emotionless shell of a heart but what cna you do? lmaoo i feel that irl, binnie deserves more vocal lines. yesss channies accent is rlly prominent then, i think also the way he structures his phrasing? is more english speaking than korean? but yeah i totally get what ur saying. AJKSAL lmao

okay then! im excited for whenever it gets done! (maybe tag me?) ahh the cold shrivelled heart of a dark au writer beats again at the thought of torturing another poor characters very soul (/j) :(( yeah that would suck not being able to see them. ohhh ur on the other hemisphere to me! were just going into spring rn. mmm smth to look forward to! YES you put it into words. they rlly are pretty independent from the company (remember how jyp rejected that other dudes songs after like 3 seconds and then how he was apparently nervous to show the song hed written to chan cos chan was so good at writing hits ahhh sweet revenge) mmmYES we rlly need a mute and remove notifications button for our brains dont we?

YES CORRECT i totally agree. some people jsut dont give it a try, adn assume its bad cos its korean smh racist assholes. yes! im coming up to my 6 month anniv actually! sis sAME, i feel like theyre being tugged into appealing to the western american market and theyre not staying as true to their artistic flair as a group, especially with only writing english songs atm. *sigh* ah well, at least theyre bringing recognition to the kpop world. AHUH dead on, theyre going to be discarded pretty soon and then where will bp be? theyll prob go solo paths which is rlly sad but what can you do when the company is run by a prideful asshole? yg is not going to last much longer in the big four if they keep this up.

hehe you get it. oooh very cool! whos ur ult? (sorry if youve said this before) mmmm yeah good decision, i feel liek thats probably a wise decision. this is my first album release as a kpop stan (not counting mixtape oh) so i think ill get it for sentiments sake. yeah! im excited for the new music! mingi was the one who got me into them, but atm my bias is seonghwa followed by san, wooyoung and ateez but jonghos high notes man *swoon* he, yeah atm ive got jake, jay, nikki, jungwon and sunoo down so just trying to get the rest :) heh, yeah kard i rlly only got into cos of bm, ive seen him like interacting with a lot of idols and he seemed nice so i decided to check out the group. ikr gunshot man *another swoon*

no noe! i didnt know what it was until i got it lol. thx toffee ill try and take that to mind :) yeah lol im on a waiting list thats not going to be free until late september so hopefully i can hold on until then. hope ur okay, that sounds like it sucks, hope you can find someone. maybe ill just take you along on my phone and the therapist can get a two for one patient deal lmaooo. mmm, sorry no i havent mentioned it before, i dont rlly talk abt it much. uhhh basically hypermobility? if you google it, it doesnt seem bad, jsut joint flexibility but ive got the severe end of the stick, leaning towards ehlers danlos syndrome so thats fun. basically it just makes it hard for me to exercise, run, jump, stand or just walk for long periods of time and gives me a lot of joint and muscle pain so... thats fun! but obviously so many other people have it worse than me, so i try not to complain. normally in young people it will improve as they get older, but my doctor said bc its severe in me, its unlikely to get much better. but again, i dont have the worst lot in the bunch, so its all g.

oh its good that its not the bad type of rain, a light sprinkling can be relaxing sometimes. aww thx darl, the concern is appreciated but it went pretty well and i managed not to cough too much on stage or kill myself trying to run around to the other side of the stage in the pouring rain so thats good! oooh tea buddies! my dogs a labradoodle, but shes a bit more of a feral poodle lol not much labrador in her at all, unless its her relentless urge to hunt down every bird that has ever walked this earth smh :((( hopefully they can come back on soon, does uni have dances?

ahhh a mood if i ever heard one. hopefully things will get better for you soon, ik anxiety sucks ass. ooh thats always good! when its sunny here, its always melt ur thongs to the pavement hot so the nicely cool sunny days are a lovely change. hehe impatience is not so good for you, but good for us that get to see ur beautiful theme early. ahh no worries, itll come eventually hopefully. and if not, then just things that make you not anxious are good. it doesnt have to be black or white, sometimes gray is good. mmmmm sames i have midterms this week to catch up on and then two weeks of end of terms so thats fun! i hope u can overcome that a little, heres some channie to be ur motivation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8LWyNjzOww. hah! i hear that all the time, he seems to be everywhere. did you see that tiktok of hans slowed back door rap, i stg it sounded EXACTLY like namjoon, it kinda scared me. also teh beginning of another day, sounds so much like joon i swear.

that reminds me! idk ur biases! i feel like this should be smth i should know so please! feel free to elaborate!

ahh im glad, i was worried it is. mmm same, so no hard feelings if either of us misses a day or smth. ill start worrying if weeks/months have gone by, but if its just a little while thats more than fine. ill just picture you studiously completing notes and i wont worry lol

<3 w.a. 🐺

at some point i really think i'm going to start blocking accounts because blocking tags won't be enough. i saw ask tags the other day and it just made me want to bleach my eyeballs.

i could talk about god's menu felix for hours man. the teaser for god's menu that featured his part on the bridge made me look forward to the mv release. you: biases chan, also you: lixiesbabyhands. yes you are more whipped than you think. i can't believe orange haired minho was given NOTHING during that era but they kind of made up for it in the b-sides. i also hope it stays that way. the distribution for this era was pretty fair.

"torturing another poor character's soul" in all honesty, i used to live for this. 2017 me leading up to early 2020 wrote nothing but angst. i have another aussie friend on twt and tbh i'm still really (O.o) about the seasons! jyp should be terrified skz could easily take over that company. heck if skz grow old and start their own company, they'd probably do a great job at running it. PLEASE. i have issues on muting/notifications both mentally and in real life. sometimes, i just wish to disappear.

some people in my country are just disgusting tbh. not only racist but homophobic too. they label kpop as 'gay' and it DISGUSTS me. it's a problematic behavior/mindset people in my country need to fucking get rid of. anyway, HELP ME 6 MONTHS??? and i've been in this shit for like a decade eye. tbh, i’m not fond of kpop groups trying to appeal to the western audience :// it feels like they’re losing their identity in a way. yes recognition but at what cost? yg has my favorite groups but that’s one shitty company when it comes to promoting.

okay my ult! it’s haechan from nct but i consider chan an ult too. like a close second above my whopping list of kpop boys. oh yes! you should get the album just for like a keepsake? remembrance? how did mingi appeal to you? omg did you start getting interested in ateez back when he was still on hiatus? NOT YOU BIASING THE SAME PEOPLE I DID WHEN I FIRST STARTED STANNING. the infamous ateez thot-line. jongho is easily one of the best fourth gen vocalists out here, no one can change my mind :( good luck with memorizing the rest of enhypen! just in time for the comeback too. i hope i’ll get into kard soon but i’m pretty content (and a tad bit overwhelmed) with the amount of groups i stan right now.

please hold on though, feel free to vent here if you like. thanks for the offer tho HAHA but like i’ll try to get checked here too when the cases die down a bit. i’m sorry to hear about your condition though :( please don’t ever overwork yourself to the point that your joints/muscles would ache. it’s completely valid to complain about it tho. i get that you have others in mind but keeping that mindset really doesn’t do you (like you internally) any better? so if you need to, vent your frustrations out and don’t keep it in.

oh my god, about your performance last sunday. was the stage out in the open? glad you didn’t cough too much and did well on your concert. i’m proud of you! i can never understand dogs and poor birds T_T uni doesn’t have dances unfortunately. i think there’s just one party at the end like a graduation ball. what year are you in anyway? if it’s something that you’re fine with sharing. if not, it’s cool.

good luck with your exams! and thanks for the link! AHA what a cutie. i think he does this motivation thing once in a while during his lives and it’s just comforting. yeah joon and han my irl just freaked when we made that discovery. ult crumbs for her. oh god not me forgetting about every biases when you asked. you can ask for my biases in a few groups just list down the one’s you’re interested in knowing.

i missed yesterday because i was grinding and finishing what if we stay + school work. finally did it today. i’m sure i’ll reply in like a day or two, definitely not a month unless i state otherwise. if i ever decide to abandon this blog, i’ll let you know.

#toff.asks #wild anon 🐺

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