#but i will try to get info about specific programs through the center that could use targeted support

[note-a-bear]

Don't go into the notes of any of the posts about the proud boys getting bashed back. So many people adoringly and self congratulating themselves for wanting 'drag queen bodyguards because they're so tough'

If yall don't shut the fuck up fetishizing forced resiliency. And all the soft uwu 'I have anxiety but I'd merc a fash' riding alongside it isn't helping.

An article about drag queens/allies HAVING to physically fight off an attempted assault by state supported bigots is NOT the place to talk about how magical action movie badass they are. It's the place to ask 'what can we offer for post-incident support'

#the center is always on shaky legs financially #but its also got massive institutional support and is the most well known space/organization in the city #so im not going to beat that particular drum at this moment #but i will try to get info about specific programs through the center that could use targeted support

[africagoal63]

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#tax preparation #notary public #car insurance

[creacherkeeper]

AAAAA SAME ANON AND I LOVE UR THOUGHTS ON THIS AU SO MUCH!!!! hskdhdkdbd PLEASE ignore this if u don’t want to talk about this au of course, but honestly i only have more !!!!! about it with every piece of info. like the line about fabian and riz’s jaeger being “unstoppable. almost.” and about how adaine joins the fray specifically bc they’re down and adaine and aelwyn are the only ppl who can fill in their place right now. also how kristen is drift compatible with everyone im!!

NO NO NO IM SO HAPPY TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!! like pacific rim really blessed us by not only being an AMAZING movie but also the best au fodder of all time??? god pacific rim au my beloved <3

some additional stuff because i cant stop:

i think ayda and adaine are totally drift compatible, but never tested together, as ayda only joined the program to pilot with fig

penelope, dayne, and ragh actually triple piloted until fig signed up. everyone thought it was better to separate penelope and dayne because they were ... not always team players when together. but after it came out everything that had been happening between dayne and ragh, that decision was heavily regretted. ragh got ... a lot of counseling after dayne was kicked out. when he was moved to combat trainer, he got a lot happier and became good friends with tracker, who'd been on base long enough to see everything go down

ayda and aelwyn actually knew each other in undergrad. aelwyn became friends with her mostly for strategic purposes, because she was the daughter of the head of the jaeger program and aelwyn wanted to build jaegers. ayda became friends with her because they were both the youngest in the STEM program and she was desperate for someone she could relate to, at least a little. they got along okay but didn't really keep in touch after graduation. they didn't start getting closer until aelwyn became a pilot, because then they COULD actually relate to each other, as scientists-turned-fighters

ayda still found out she was autistic through jawbone, once she finished school and came to base to study kaiju. she opened up to him about how hard it was to relate to her peers, and he was like kiddo youre probably autistic?? like over half of the scientists here are?? and she was like. OH. after everythings over and fig goes back to being a musician, she donates a lot of her touring profits to autistic-led advocacy groups because like. she's literally felt what it's like to live with an autistic brain, and it makes her the biggest ally of all time (and ayda being a very prominent autistic scientist AND pilot actually does like. SO MUCH for autism acceptance. she frequently gives lectures on fig's touring routes)

after they close the breach, fabian gets into a huge blowout fight with bill. cause bill makes his money by selling kaiju parts, so without the kaiju, he doesn't have a job. and by that point fabian has had enough distance and experience that he's like. i would have died for you but i fucking made a name for myself that was better than anything you've ever tried to do, now i get to live for me. and even though he wasn't expecting it, bill actually completely accepts and supports that

yeah so pok actually died cause he got eaten by a kaiju after drifting with one using the pons system he invented. its extremely difficult to hear but riz is also like. that is the most badass thing ive ever fucking heard oh my god (they name the neuroscience program at riz's college after pok. sklonda starts law school there the year after they close the breach)

kristen literally proposes to tracker the day after they close it, barely conscious, with a giant hole in her chest, from her hospital bed. everyone is like. my dude. tracker thinks its extremely romantic

(they end up adopting a bunch of kids who were orphaned because of kaiju attacks)

gorgug goes to college and becomes a high school social studies teacher. zelda runs a local gym. they have an extremely quiet life and are happy to, most of the time, not be noticed or bothered. every once in a while an extremely nerdy kid will recognize gorgug's PARENTS as jaeger mechanics and completely ignore gorgug and zelda thinks its hilarious

after they close the breach, the abernant parents reach out to BOTH aelwyn and adaine to ask them to come back home to visit and be celebrated. and theyre like. mmmm fuck that actually?? but adaine does have a BIT of an existential crisis cause shes like OKAY WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO WITH MY LIFE NOW?? they actually end up getting a little apartment together somewhere and aelwyn pays the bills as an engineer making advanced prosthetics. she encourages adaine to just try out as much as possible, and she takes a ton of classes at the community college, the community center, and at various local businesses. but its actually jawbone who inspires her to go back for another degree and become a psych researcher. she makes waves in the trauma and ptsd field

theyre all pretty happy that kalvaxis, category iv, and nightmare, category v, got blown to hell at the bottom of the ocean

#fantasy high #dimension 20 #the bad kids #OKAY I REALLY HAVE TO STOPPPP #YALL STOP ENCOURAGING ME IM TOO INVESTED IN THIS AU #(dont stop i love it) #pacific rim au

[the-glitter-acetylcholine]

Sexual Health Resources!!

Okay, so this list is mostly just links that I want to save for myself, but they could probaly help you too. Almost all of these sites are specifically aimed at afab people, and some of them use feminine gendered language (notably, all links including “girl2girl” assume readers are cis girls), but the info could be useful to anyone. I got most of these links through the girl2girl.org program, which is a 2-ish month long sex ed and pregnancy prevention program for teen wlw. I know this stuff can be super awkward, but it’s really worth knowing, especially since the sex ed system in the U.S. is literal trash.

General Info

https://www.scarleteen.com -- really good info, trans, nb, and intersex inclusive, with specific parts of the site dedicated to gender and disabilities (among other things! i really recommend giving this site a look-through sometimes when you're bored, it's my favorite on this list and it has in-depth information on every category i list below)

https://www.plannedparenthood.org -- similar to scarleteen, though not specifically oriented towards teens; you may already know this, but planned parenthood does more than abortions! check out the "learn" tab for in-depth info on all the categories below.

https://girl2girl.org -- 2-ish month long sex ed program for teen wlw, completed via text (same as above)

https://sexetc.org/states/colorado/ -- info on rights to abortion, birth control, STD testing and more, organized by state (tbh this one is another favorite, the whole site is defo worth exploring)

Domestic Abuse/Sexual Assault

http://TheHotline.org -- info on domestic abuse, 24/7 hotline, and resources for abuse survivors/victims 

http://Loveisrespect.org -- similar to above, specifically for teens and young adults

http://ohl.rainn.org/online -- sexual assault hotline and resources

Pregnancy and STD Prevention

https://quiz.girl2girl.org/? -- quiz to help afabs determine which birth control methods work best for them, provides links to relevant resources upon quiz completion

https://www.nurx.com/our-services/ -- cheap, online birth control, STD testing, emergency contraception, and (bonus!) migrane treatment

https://girl2girl.org/resources/condom-app/ -- information about iCondom app (locates nearby condom purchase options) and links to app store for android and iphone

https://girl2girl.org/contraception/ -- infographic about various afab contraceptives

https://girl2girl.org/sexually-transmitted-diseases/  -- infographic about STDs, their symptoms, and treatment options

https://gettested.cdc.gov -- CDC STD testing options

https://sexetc.org/action-center/clinic-finder/ -- HIV/STD clinic finder (for testing or treatment)

https://www.glydeamerica.com -- vegan condoms, in case you’re worried about latex and all that

https://girl2girl.org/how-to-use-a-condom/ -- video on how to use a condom (don’t worry, it’s not explicit, and it doesn’t automatically play when you open the tab)

https://girl2girl.org/female-condoms/ -- video on how to use a female condom (non-explicit, doesn’t automatically play)

Pregnancy Termination

http://www.afterpill.com -- morning after pill!! (okay, this doesn’t technically count as termination but you do it after sex so I’m putting it here) (also pls know that the shipping isn’t super fast, so if you need the pill immediately, you should get it in person at a pharmacy or large retail store)

https://www.plannedparenthood.org -- planned parenthood site

www.plannedparenthood.org/online-tools/chat -- planned parenthood live chat (not 24/7, unfortunately)

Other Important Info I Don’t Have Links For

Buy condoms that are latex, plyurethane, or ployisoprene, not lambskin. Lambskin can let STDs through.

Use water-based lube; Vaseline or oil-based lube will ruin a condom.

Even if the sex isn’t afab/amab, use protection. STDs are always a danger.

It’s worth using condoms on toys, too, since STDs can’t really be cleaned from a toy’s pores

On that note, get tested often. STDs can be trasmitted by things other than sex, so even if you’re not having sex or you’re sure that you and your partner(s) are clean, you may have picked something up by accident. Even sharing a water bottle can sometimes cause STD transmission, so check. If you picked something up, you’ll want to know sooner rather than later.

Condoms are useful, even for afab/afab sex! “Male” condoms can be altered into dental dams (for oral sex), and they make “female” condoms (which btw are latex-free), too! The links above that give info on birth control nearly all elaborate on this

Try to keep some condoms with you, even if you think there’s literally no way you’d need one. You never know what’ll happen, and it doesn’t hurt to be prepared. Besides, maybe a friend will need one, and then you’ll be friend of the year (afabs, it’s like carrying tampons/pads when you’re not on your period)

Don’t flush condoms down to toilet

Remember condoms are single use!!!

Check the condoms you carry frequently. Make sure they aren’t past their expiration date, and that the packaging hasn’t been punctured or bent. If any of these things have happened, chuck ‘em! They won’t work anymore. (just make sure you remember to replace them, too)

If you smoke, you shouldn’t use birth control pills. This is probably a non-issue bc pills are usually prescribed, but just bear it in mind

Title X clinics (for abortions and other pregnancy options) are great, but be careful! There are organizations that set themselves up near abortion clinics to confuse people. They operate specifically with the agenda to guilt people out of getting an abortion. These places are usually called something along the lines of “Crisis Pregnancy Center” or “Pregnancy Choice”. John Oliver has a 21-minute talk about them here (okay, so maybe I do have a link for this one lol) (btw this is a youtube link, so it plays automatically).

update mar. 10, '21: i added a few links and, though i've discovered i'm not actually wlw, but the info from all these sites has been and continues to be extremely useful to me! remember that you don't have to be a cis girl or AFAB for these sites to be worth looking at!

#OH realized while I was writing this that it's world contraception day! #September 26 lmaoooo #how fitting #i'll add onto this later probably #but here's what i have for now! #wlw #wlw culture #save this for later #pregnancy prevention #birth control #sex ed #lesbian #bi girls #oop that's gonna show up in the tags about the show huh #sex ed for teens #important #nblw #okay idek what else to tag this as i give up #percussion strings winds words

[oversimplify-it]

Story Process Tag by @herpixels​

I was tagged by @dynastiasimss​ - Thank you so much for tagging me!! 😊💖💗 This will most definitely get a bit wordy because I’m terrible at explaining things concisely! 😂 Also, I’ll mostly be talking about my process for 2.B.A Grandmaster but I’ll touch on my process for Erin in San Myshuno too!

I’m also going to get tags out of the way up here so that no one has to scroll all the way through this ... absolute novel that is under the cut LMAO so I tag: @cyansimblr  @x-simss @matchacake and any other simblrs who wanna do this!! and feel free to skip if you want!

1. Your writing process My writing process is very, very chaotic, and changes with the wind... Erin in San Myshuno doesn’t really have a process, I just play the game and then put in some dialogue based on the events. None of it is guided by my hand at all though! 2.B.A Grandmaster on the other hand is written in part based on what happens in game and in part by my own creative vision. Most of the time, I let stuff happen, and then fill in the blanks in between events. I go in game, play Sims as I normally would (skill build, take care of needs, go out to venues, etc.) and then watch what weird and interesting things happen. For example, Augusta’s meeting with Xavier in the beginning was completely the game’s doing! He was the only one to show up for the Welcome Wagon event, so I rolled with that. Scenes like Kaitlin’s meeting with Maverick and those sort of things are planned by me, as they’re necessary to create a more full narrative! It’s like collaborative storytelling, but my “partner” is a game that is weird and random and crazy. 😂 After stuff happens in game and I get screenshots, I then actually write for it. I chose to write novel style for the series because - as some of my long-term followers may remember - I had another story that was just screenshots with dialogue on them? And it was very hard, LOL, it didn’t suit my workflow very well and I ended up dropping it after a month or so. I wanted 2.B.A Grandmaster to be something I could post consistently, and so I opted for a style that I was more familiar and experienced with!

2. Scene building For the most part, I just work with what sims gives me, but as I mentioned above, some scenes I actually go to the trouble of setting up. For those, I still use the sims animations mostly (I’ve used poses about 3 times in 2.B.A Grandmaster so far) but I do usher my sims around the "set” as I see fit. I build a lot of my own lots and locations for 2.B.A GM because I tend to get a vision in my mind of what I want and refuse to settle for less. 😂 One such case is the scene where Maverick meets up with Octavia--

I made the alleyway we see here - it’s two entirely empty buildings sandwiched side by side on an otherwise empty lot in Oasis Springs. The only part I bothered to decorate was the alley itself because I knew I wasn’t going to use the rest of the area, but maybe we’ll revisit it sometime and I’ll finish the two buildings! I actually loved making this set and like how it turned out, LOL~

Then I just have whatever sims are involved in a scene interact with each other for ages until I feel like I have enough screenshots to make a scene. I usually have a vague idea of what’s going to be said in any given scene - especially the ones I actually planned out beforehand - but I get some excess screenshots to be safe. I try lots of different interactions and pause like every few frames to get interesting expressions and stuff, LOL. Lots of “Complain about Cold Weather” and “Give fake bad news” ...

3. CC/Pose making I don’t actually make my own CC for 2.B.A GM specifically (I’ve made a couple eyeshadows but I don’t use them super frequently) but there is a scene coming up in the future that I plan to make poses for. I have a very clear image in my mind that includes a lot of subtle expressions and very specific things that I doubt I could find poses for, so I’m gonna have to brave the terrifying landscape of blender in order to make it a reality. 😧

4. Getting in the zone I don’t have any sort of “ok, show time” ritual like some people do but I wish I did, because my motivation waxes and wanes so unpredictably. Some days I just don’t feel like doing anything, and other days I edit and write for 5 posts in a row! I am always listening to something though, usually music, every once in a blue moon a video with lots of talking. 5. Screenshot folder

UGH... 

6. Captions I don’t do captions on 2.B.A GM posts, but for my city living gameplay I do! I keep them simple, because I don’t want to make it too much work for myself. Erin in San Myshuno’s style of editing is 100% based around ease, because I wanted something to post often that didn’t put too much of a strain on me. Verdana in white, typically 35-40 px, with a gradient border. Each sim we encounter has a different gradient color, usually based on their outfit or just the ~vibe~ I get from them. Erin’s gradient is Hot pink to ... gee, what would you call it. Sonic the Hedgehog Blue LMAO-- I chose that gradient because that’s the color of the overlay, which I’ll talk more about in the next section!

7. Editing My two ‘series’ - and I use that term loosely LMAO - have different editing processes, so I’ll try to summarize them both. Basically, for 2.B.A Grandmaster, I touch up the saturation and brightness depending on the scene. If it’s evening in the shots, I usually won’t touch brightness, and if it’s night, I might even lower it a bit for more accurate lighting! Once that’s done, I blur everything but relevant elements of a scene, usually the character we’re following or who is speaking. I have to select the character from the background manually which takes a bit, but other than that it’s very minimal.

My shots aren’t super glamorous, but I prefer simple screenshots and actually being able to keep up with a story schedule as opposed to what happened with my last story. 😬 As for Erin in San Myshuno, barring captions which I only do when I feel it’s necessary, it’s literally just an overlay on otherwise untouched screenshots. 😭 I would do more, but again, it’s supposed to be an easy downtime sort of series for me so~

This goes over top all screenshots on the “Add” setting at 20% opacity. It brightens things up and softens them, as well as making the colors slightly more harmonious! If anyone wants me to go more in depth on editing, or maybe captions, please let me know! I’m happy to talk about it if it’ll help anyone, and I know that a lot of tutorials cover how to do stuff in Photoshop, whereas I use FireAlpaca (which is 100% free btw! It’s more of an art program, but not bad for editing) 8. Throwback!

Oh boy, so this is one of my first posts on simblr. For starters, I didn’t know about camera mode at the time, so that’s the first thing I would change obviously LOL. 😬 The framing I did at the time was ... cute, but it makes the pictures feel kind of cramped and small in my opinion, so I did away with that for all of my later stories. Also, Amy and Gemma aren’t very well centered in this picture! Other than that, this isn’t actually terrible I don’t think, so aside from maybe blurring the background as I do on 2.B.A GM now, I wouldn’t change too much! Thankfully, I had observed other people’s stories before making my own on here for a little bit, so I wasn’t starting with absolutely no idea what to do, but I still think I’ve improved since I made these. 😊

This was a ton of fun!! If anyone has questions or wants more info on anything I covered in here, absolutely feel free to ask, and thank you so much if you actually read through all of this - I know I rambled for quite a while!! 🙏

#tag #extras: 2.B.A Grandmaster

[galacticnova3]

I Demand Iru Facts (if you’re up for it ofc!)

A

Yes I am up for it! I don’t think I talk nearly enough about my fcs here but I think I wanna change that. At the very least it will be the problem of everyone following me here and not just my cool and epic Discord friends. That being said I’m gonna just share the major info about him before/instead of just giving facts bc otherwise nothing will make sense. That’s just how it is with a lot of my stuff. This gets super long because I am bad at keeping stuff brief and in general there’s just a lot to him, whoops... Looks like I’ll be using another readmore tonight.

Iru was an Umbramaker! They are bootleg Mirror World Starcutters, which Mirror Halcandra definitely designed on their own and not by stealing and subsequently copying Overworld Halcandra’s Starcutter blueprints. To be fair, there are a few differences, but most of them are just aesthetic and don’t really change much. Anyways, Iru was specifically designed for disaster relief and material transportation. That’s why, if you have seen his refs, he had those two big mechanical arms. Very useful for moving rubble or lifting large pieces of metal for use in construction. Nowadays they... aren’t used for such beneficial things, though...

Like their Overworld counterparts, Umbramaker AIs are programmed to learn from their environment and the people around them, which is pretty useful! At least it is until one spends a lot of time around someone who’s not a great person, and subsequently picks up habits and ideas that make them insufferable! That’s what happened to Iru. He’s misogynistic and a thot, self-centered, inconsiderate, manipulative, generally annoying, and blames people not liking him on jealousy or misunderstanding. So, in other words, an incel minus anything literally sexual. Obviously that was a problem, and it got to the point that basically everyone who knew him had negative feelings toward him, other than the guy who rubbed off on him. He died though, and Iru didn’t really care at the time. But everyone hated him, and it really fucked up his relationships with other Umbramakers, most notably leading to him being broken up with by another ship he had been “dating” (Umbramakers can’t really date because of a lot of reasons but their relationship had that vibe), who had discovered she was biromantic and also couldn’t stand what Iru had become.

Iru was already pretty fucking hurt and pissed over that, except she then went on to spread rumors about him being involved in anti-government activities. Which, well, Mirror Halcandra didn’t take lightly, on top of having already been looking for excuses to “recycle” (see: kill and repurpose the parts of) Iru because he and his obnoxious personality were getting in the way of efficiency and productivity. There wasn’t any proof that he’d actually done anything wrong, but basically anyone who disliked Iru was saying it was true... which was just about anyone who had known him for more than 10 minutes. Given it was his word against the vast majority, and Umbramakers weren’t even considered to be people(mush like Starcutters in the Overworld), it probably isn’t difficult to guess how things went for him. There was no trial, and in fact they literally turned his voice off to make him shut up. Then his AI was shut off and he was taken to be disassembled.

At an earlier time in Mirror Halcandra’s history, his story would have ended here. This was not an earlier time, though. See, the truth is, such treatment of Umbramakers wasn’t extremely unusual. Despite having emotions and thoughts and relationships and all that, they were still viewed as nothing more than your average computer, just in a larger form. Unlike Overworld Halcandra, which was and still is doing less than great financially, Mirror Halcandra could afford to replace their toys as soon as they showed signs of breaking or underperforming. It happened often enough that they reached a point of complacency. During Iru’s disassembly, something was removed improperly, which registered as damage. He woke up, and it wasn’t difficult for him to figure out what was going on.

Another usually useful feature of Umbramakers, which actually wasn’t copied from Starcutters, is their ability to use parts interchangeably, so long as there wasn’t too much of a size difference. Great for the situation of a ship damaging something like, say, a wing; they can use a wing not originally designed for them temporarily until the damaged one is repaired or replaced. Not so great when that allows a now rogue ship to just grab whatever he could attach to himself and then escape the country before preparations could be made to stop him. Negative levels of great when you consider the temporary aspect of using the wrong parts; now you’ve got perfectly fine ships being attacked and having their parts stolen, and storage facilities being raided, for the bastard to keep replacements on hand. Oh, and he also looks like shit because he’s got multiple conflicting aesthetics.

Iru honestly didn’t enjoy living like that. For one, it was uncomfortable physically, even if he’d managed to convince himself that what he was doing wasn’t uncomfortable morally. Secondly, it was just boring! Nobody to talk to or hang out with, all he did was just fly around or plan his next attack/raid for new parts, nothing to shake things up. Sure, the sense of power it gave him was cool; nobody listened to him at all before, but now he had the influence to make people beg. He found satisfaction in being feared by anyone who recognized him. But even that lost its shine after a few decades... Until he connected to the messaging system of another rogue Umbramaker. She was smaller, too small for him to consider getting parts from, and a much older model anyways. She also didn’t know who he was, or what he looked like.

Naturally, he saw this as a huge win, because obviously he was going to get a new gf who wouldn’t betray him like his old one. That didn’t happen though, on account of him still being obnoxious and a creep. Didn’t help that when he finally tracked her down to meet up she was disgusted by him and immediately left. He still kept in touch, against her will, even to the point that you might have called it stalking. Through that, he learned of a Starcutter; she didn’t have the cool and aloof personality he was interested in, but at that point he didn’t care because he was sick of being rejected. Same thing happened again but faster, due to there being no physical encounter because god damnit he forgot the milfs can communicate with each other. He still wanted to meet her though, and he did! Mostly to find out more about the other Umbramaker’s whereabouts, and as an added bonus he tricked the Starcutter’s pilot into giving him admin rights over himself! Threats really work wonders, huh?

That was all fine and good, and by now he’d taken to vibing outside the Mirror World because that’s what the other two were doing. One day he spotted the Starcutter again, and took to following her around and trying to flirt with her because he’s a fucking creep. He would not admit that it took him several days to realize he had, in fact, been talking to a mimic the entire time. Partly because he was too self absorbed to realize the “Starcutter” not immediately telling him to fuck off was unusual, because he assumed he’d charmed her. The mimic was just as confused as he was, honestly; usually they fail to keep up the act to a convincing degree for so long around people who know the real ship that they’re imitating. Even more confusing was the fact that when they were found out, Iru didn’t try to attack them or something. No, he actually stuck around for some reason, casually ignoring murder because he finally found someone who didn’t hate him.

The two become what could arguably be considered friends, and eventually Iru opens up about himself and his old life and how much it sucked to be him and how sick he was of the monotony of his existence and probably some overdramatic stuff mixed in with all that. The mimic hears all that and keeps it in mind for later. Stuff gets more difficult for Iru as parts that fit him become better guarded and the ships he could steal from get harder to find. His raids become riskier, and eventually the mimic decided enough was enough and points out that he can’t keep that up forever. Iru is like “oh wow thanks for the advice /s”, until the mimic introduces the concept of him becoming a mimic. It takes a solid not-even-an-hour to convince him that that’d be preferable were it possible. In the process he delivered a powerful and emotional monologue, which the mimic didn’t care about because look, they figured out how to get the monster juice out of themself that’d make him a fellow disgusting flesh boat! Iru is offended but also takes the chance for a better life.

Currently, he’s living at some point a few weeks after that, much to everyone’s dismay.

And that’s how Iru became a vile meat creature after having already become a horrible Frankenstein’s monster of different ships’ parts! The moral of the story is, if you’re gonna kill someone, do it right, or else they might defy the laws of nature, science, and the government to become physically capable of biting you in the ass.

#ask to tag #long post #asks #rambling #my characters #iru #(I also reference other characters in this but I don’t say their names and don’t want to tag them bc this is about Iru)

[whatshouldwecallchronicillness]

So I have weird relationship with my mental health because I feel like I can't prioritize it since I have many health issues to worry about (autoimmune disease,multi-organ issues,etc..) Does anyone else feel like this? I start to feel kinda jealous of people who do get to prioritize mental health cause I struggle with mine but I feel I have nowhere to turn to receive help or think about it cause everything else is consuming me and I already see many doctors for a variety of things. Any advice?

I think that we tend to focus whatever is most important for survival and what gets us through the day, and that’s ok.  Survival will mean different things to different people - for some that would be prioritizing physical health, for some mental health, for some making sure they have food/water/shelter, for some seeking safety.  I don’t think prioritizing one thing over another is wrong, though it may be a bummer.  Like, I think that being able to concentrate on mental health isn’t privilege necessarily (and if it is, that’s ok! having privilege isn’t a fault!), but maybe more reflective of what other people need more at that time.  Ideally we can get to a place where we can fulfill all those basic needs and focus instead on wellness - not just solving problems but creating health and happiness.   

So when you are in the trenches and are fighting for survival, focus on the fight, whatever that is to you.  And when things calm down, there’s lots of ways you can cultivate better mental health.  I’m feeling another list coming on...

Professional Help

-Don’t let the barriers make you afraid to try!  It’s hard to gain access to professional mental help, but it’s important to try anyway if it’s something you want or need.  

-Do some reading about the different types of mental health professionals so you know who you may want to see.  I personally feel that seeing a psychiatrist first is best because they can rule out (or in) any chemical stuff going on, diagnose when appropriate, and they are usually very helpful when it comes to either providing therapy themselves or offering referrals to therapists.  They also may be more likely to be covered by insurance.    

-If you have health insurance (I’m assuming you are in the US), you can go to your insurance company’s website and look up which local doctors/therapists are on your plan.  Look through a bunch until you find someone who looks good and give them a call.  You may need to sign in to your account to do this, but not always.

-If you are in college, most campus health centers have resources that are free or low cost for students.  This may be accessible even if you aren’t on campus due to COVID.

-If you are in high school or junior high, you also may still be able to access services through your school even if you don’t go in person.  You can ask a teacher or your counselor about that.  Their contact info would likely be on your school’s website or paperwork that has been sent home at some point.    

-Some medical groups/hospitals may have resources available through their website.  

-During your next hospitalization, they should ask you at some point if you want to meet with a social worker.  Say yes!!!!  In my experience, the yes was ignored, but it’s worth a shot.  A social worker can help you find a therapist that is financially and otherwise accessible to you.  When I’ve worked in mental health we got most of our referrals for from social workers.    

-If you don’t have health insurance, google something like “free therapy in (your county)” or look up health programs from your county’s government website.  Call your county’s public health office and ask for ideas.  If you have ever been a part of any government programs, you may find resources through those by asking your caseworker.  There are also programs that may cater to specific demographics like people with certain health conditions, people of certain ages,  people in lower socioeconomic status, being a survivor of domestic violence, belonging to a certain race/ethnicity/religion/background, etc.  It’s funny that despite working for lots of places that offer free therapy, I don’t really know how the average person finds us other than through social work referrals.  Maybe someone else has good ideas?    

-Whether or not you have insurance, you may need to be on a waitlist before you start seeing someone.  So get on that waitlist!  A wait, even a long wait is better than never!

-If local health isn’t feasible or while you are waiting on a waitlist, there are a bunch of online therapy options that are sprouting up.  As I haven’t personally used any, I don’t want to give a recommendation, but maybe someone else can?  

-If you have any higher education nearby, there may be local studies you can join and receive mental health services that way.  If not locally, there may be options online.  I did an art therapy program for a few months through an online study.  They even sent me art supplies!

Non-Professional Help

-There are so many books, blogs, podcasts, and videos out there with self-help stuff.  A lot of it is complete rubbish, but there’s lots of gems too.  Sort through it with a discerning eye, ask for recommendations from people you trust, and see if anything feels like a good fit for you.  Stay away from anything that promises too much, sounds too much like a cult, or activates your BS meter.  I find that trendy bestsellers or celebrity endorsed anything is usually terrible.      Look for sources that clearly state which school of thought they come from and what their qualifications are.  (For example, I really like cognitive behavioral therapy.)  When you can’t manage consistently going to therapy, you may be able to squeeze in a 15 min podcast, a few pages in a workbook, or reading a couple chapters in a book before you go to sleep.  Keep in mind that just like taking care of physical health, being overseen by a professional is still safest. Be careful, but don’t rule this avenue out!

-Aside from a guided self-help experience, you can also work to educate yourself about mental health and types of interventions/treatment.  I learned a lot that has helped my mental health by becoming an occupational therapist.  Now maybe a masters degree is a bit much, but even some surface level academic perusing could be helpful.  And being more informed can help you find a professional to work with who will be a good match.  

-Talk to people you trust.  Now your friends and family aren’t professionals (or at least not your mental health professional), but they still can offer support or a listening ear.  Sometimes talking things out can help if it’s with the right person, boundaries are respected, and you can trust their advice.  

-Do things that improve your mental health.  Not just things that make you happy, but things that help you process your emotions, regulate your emotions, and feel more content.  Maybe it’s art, or watching stand up comedy, or volunteering at the local humane society, or writing.  Do these things and remember to acknowledge them as things you are actively doing to improve your mental health.  Each time you chose one of these things over something that doesn’t contribute to your mental health, it’s an accomplishment to celebrate.  (You may find that you do more than you think for your mental health everyday!)

I hope you someday have the spoons to find something that works well for you!  

#therapy #mental health #counseling #ideas #ask me stuff #or tell me stuff #or say hi #I love mail! #Anonymous

[partshark5]

The Voice Of The Youngster On Separation And Divorce

You, your wife, spouse or civil partner remain in arrangement as well as there is no dispute. undisputed, it should take between three to four months from sending out in the divorce petition, to the declaration of your Decree Nisi. What typically occurs in the daytime soap and films is a warmed exchange, which results in a significant court room battle.

If you have problems with your ex lover not paying kid upkeep, the CMO can help you recoup what is owed to you. If you or your ex-partner do not normally reside in either England or Wales, and for that reason, as a result can not be taken into consideration as "habitually resident". You intend to submit a court application however, for specific reasons you do not wish to inform your spouse, hubby, or civil companion prior to.

Obtain Assistance And Advice

You may need to take into consideration other options, such as among you remaining in the residential property while the other rents, or living together in the family members house in the temporary. Selling the family members residence is commonly viewed as the most convenient choice if you're splitting up. the benefits of arbitration as well as other ideal forms of resolving conflicts. The MIAM is a meeting between you as well as a conciliator to find out if there are different methods to discover solutions to your troubles.

How do you negotiate divorce mediation?

1. Set Specific Goals for Your Divorce Mediation Before the First Session. 2. Preparation is Key: Arm Yourself with Knowledge and Facts. 3. Don't Rush the Process: Avoid Mistakes Through Diligence and Care. 4. Keep Your Eyes on Your Prize. mediation services cumbria . The Role of Mediation Coaches. 6. Avoid Retainers with Pay-As-You-Go Mediation.

This is called shuttle bus mediation and also you would normally have separate arrival as well as departure times. MISCONCEPTION-- The courts will certainly very rarely aim to punish or award for behavior in a marriage. In some cases the person dedicating the infidelity might be asked to cover the court costs (presently ₤ 550, or ₤ 600 with an authorization order). MYTH-- The parenting plans and youngster upkeep payments are treated as two different issues.

Exactly How To Keep Separation Out Of Court? (Component.

A court could relocate that as much as 100%/ 0% if the situations dictated. MISCONCEPTION-- Congratulations on winning the lotto, but case law reveals they are an asset of the marital relationship and have to be revealed. MISCONCEPTION-- Family mediation can be carried out online or can be held one-on-one however whilst you remain in separate rooms.

There is no easy 'one-size-fits-all solution' due to the fact that every person's situation is various.

Likewise, mediation restricts the stress and anxiety and anxiety that you as well as your ex-partner will experience during the partnership break up.

This suggests that in separation or separation you can still utilize our professional arbitration solutions to assist make settlements over parenting, residential or commercial property and also cash.

However, if you require splitting up suggestions our expert family mediators can aid you settle on all problems relating to money, building as well as parenting.

You can moderate without leaving home to see one of our family mediation centres, which individuals are discovering particularly helpful given Coronavirus constraints.

Family mediation is not regarding attempting to keep couples with each other yet assisting them carry on to the following phases of their lives. If you are considering arbitration due to its several benefits, but after that assume "What takes place if my ex lover will not go to arbitration? You might assume or recognize that your ex doesn't wish to try mediation to get to a settlement when you're dividing.

Our Services.

By doing this you will have the ability to work through all the problems that are influencing your life now you have separated and discover usual and agreed options to the problems. With the aid of a conciliator, the program can be anything you both accept talk about and moderate. Living together as well as being married do not amount to the very same thing when people different, nonetheless long they have been together.

8 Signs You Should Skip Mediation and Head Straight for the Divorce Lawyer - Lifehacker

8 Signs You Should Skip Mediation and Head Straight for the Divorce Lawyer.

Posted: Fri, 11 Aug 2017 07:00:00 GMT [source]

MISCONCEPTION-- The job put into elevating a family members and also caring for the family house are usually treated as equal to the paid work you did during the marriage. MISCONCEPTION-- The third party is really seldom named in divorce proceedings. A lot of courts would certainly now throw away a case where a third party was named. MYTH-- There is no basic computation and also the end result is concurred very much on your private scenarios and also demands. What one court might pick someday with the very same information could be completely various to an additional court on one more day. MISCONCEPTION-- We have heard this many times as well as not sure where it has actually originated from. The beginning factor for division of assets is known as the 'benchmark of equality' at a 50/50 split.

# 5 Do I Still Require A Lawyer Or Legal Representative To Give Recommendations If I Have A Moderator?

It is very unsafe to compare various other separations and also this can lead to impractical expectations and pricey disagreements. TRUTH-- Although a full court case will certainly take months if not years and can set you back over of ₤ 10,000 each. MYTH-- Sometimes arbitration is not appropriate and this will certainly be established using a MIAMs consultation. Mediate UK can assist you concur an interim strategy, until the future living plans as well as department of assets is agreed. MISCONCEPTION-- There is no such point as usual law marriage in the UK-- not since 1753 anyway-- as well as therefore there is no automatic right to share assets. We can still assist couples that are not wed concur a fair split of joint assets and also parenting arrangements. MYTH-- The court would certainly take a dim sight of any efforts to conceal cash.

uk family mediation service ="display: flex;justify-content: center;">

In reality, this is only good to enjoy if it is on the television. This is because British society is conditioned by tv dramatization and also movies, to instantly jump on the phone and advise a solicitor. However, most of pairs generally involve a contract after roughly 2 or three sessions. Arbitration is not suitable where there is proof of residential abuse or significant welfare/child defense issues that are increased by one or both celebrations at the preliminary Arbitration Details and also Analysis Meeting,. It is an excellent idea to take therapy as well as therapy to make sure that you remain in a mentally stable placement to play an effective part in arbitration. Sushma Kotecha, Taking Care Of Companion and also Accredited Mediator from the Stowe Household Law office in Nottingham details exactly how you can utilize mediation to help you separate in the guide listed below. Collaborating with an objective third-party enables pairs to get pragmatic support as well as lawful info to assist them reach their resolutions.

Your Choices For Legal Or Monetary Advice On Separation If You Were Cohabiting.

#mediation service #mediation service UK #mediation service United Kingdom #Best mediation service #best mediator #family mediation service #chile mediation service #divorce mediation service #Best mediation service UK #best mediator UK #family mediation service UK #chile mediation service UK #divorce mediation service UK

[spoonie-living]

[Image: a person in plaid flannel and boots falling on the backdrop of a foggy sky. Credit: Pexels]

The Hard Fall: How getting on disability can impact your benefits (U.S.)

As spoonies, we’re generally occupied with getting on disability, but what happens once we win our case?

My lawyer didn’t prepare me at all for this, so when I got my confirmation letter and first payments, I had no idea what it would do to my government services.

When I called around, I got directed to some local government office. “Yeah honey,” the woman on the other line said sympathetically, “we call that the hard fall.”

And hard it was; I lost access to several doctors and had to pay out of pocket while sorting out my prescription coverage. And honestly, it could have been a lot worse.

This is something you want to know about before you win, because the last thing you need is to flail around trying to sort everything out as fast as possible. Trust me, I’ve been there. And I’d like it if you didn’t have to go there.

If you’re waiting on a case, take a few minutes to look through this information! It’ll help you set your expectations and save you some grief as you get settled after your case comes through.

I’ll be updated this as I come across more information (or potholes in the road), so click here to see the most up-to-date version of this post!

Disability backpay can push you out of resource-/asset-based programs

If you’ve been waiting a while on your case, your backpay could be pretty huge; after about two years, mine was $35k!

HEADS UP: If you’re blazing through your disability backpay to handle unpaid bills, be sure to leave yourself a decent cushion in case you have to pay for things out of pocket while everything gets sorted out.

If you’ve been benefiting from programs that determine eligibility based on how much cash you have in the bank (for example, food stamps), your backpay will probably knock you right out of them.

Take a moment to assess what government services you receive and prepare for their loss. In theory, the extra disability income will replace it, but… well, that’s only in theory.

NEED AN ESCAPE ROUTE? There’s an option called an ABLE Account that allows you to set cash aside for anything related to living with a disability (and that’s a broad category). This cash does not count towards your assets as evaluated by some (some) assistance programs.

You can only deposit $15k/year, though, so depending on the spare cash you end up with, you may spend a year off asset-based services. Note also that your disability (as recognized by the government) must have had an onset before 26 to quality.

Disability income can push you out of income based services… like Medicaid

I gave a thought to insurance only once I received the letter confirming my win. I had heard something about getting on Medicare, but not much else. I figured I’d have both at once. But… that wasn’t the case.

Turns out, disability income counts towards the income cutoffs associated with Medicaid. Yes, I now “make too much money” to qualify for Obamacare. Which didn’t exactly make sense. If I qualify for income assistance due to a disability, why wouldn’t I be a good Medicaid candidate? And why, oh why, would being declared disabled be a good time to mess with a person’s medical coverage?

What I learned is all comes down to the state/federal divide. Medicaid is state, and Medicare and disability are federal. The state doesn’t care where the money comes from; it’s just income to them. Meanwhile, Medicare is granted to everyone who gets on disability. Some folks with low enough disability income are “dual eligible” (which comes with its own weird logistics), but others, like me, end up just on Medicare.

This was really bad news for me, as Oregon Medicaid has really fantastic coverage. I got lucky with my providers overall, but still lost access to a couple important ones. You’ll want to look ahead as you wait on a determination and figure out whether you’ll be paying out of pocket or dealing with a gap in care as you start the insurance shuffle.

WARNING: While some states offer Medicaid coverage for naturopathic medicine (thanks, Oregon!), be aware that Medicare does not. You’ll need to pay out pocket or look for a Part C plan (see below) that does cover naturopaths. Which will be cheaper? Get out your calculator…

ETA: Medicare doesn’t cover routine dental or vision, either! It’s worth calling one of the orgs listed under Getting Help, below, to see if there are some subsidized options for you. Otherwise, check out this article for some ways to get that dental coverage. It looks like an Advantage Plan (Part C, see below) is the best option if you need vision coverage.

About Medicare coverage

The first thing to know about Medicare is that it has multiple, potentially moving, parts. Part A is hospital and emergency coverage, B is routine medical care, and D is prescriptions. What about C? Well, C is optional, bundled coverage that overwrites parts A, B, and D.

I don’t know all the factors involved in my case, but what I do know is that I received core Medicare for parts A and B, with Aetna for part D (prescriptions). However, there was a gap between that and the end of my Medicaid prescription coverage—so I was enrolled in the NET program, which is another prescription coverage to ensure you don’t get wrecked by transitions like this.

The most fun part? Nobody called me to get me “set up” and fill in the gaps. I was at the mercy of bureaucracy and the postal service to know what I was enrolled in. So for a little while I was just spinning my wheels and definitely paid for a prescription or two out of pocket.

NOW I KNOW: I probably could have created an account with Medicare.gov to get that info sooner. It’s worth trying, to see if you can save yourself the trouble.

Once I gave my insurance info to the pharmacy, they were able to initiate a partial refund for the difference. If they hadn’t, I would have needed to put in a claim by mail and waited for that to process.

BUT SERIOUSLY: Don’t wait on getting stuff in the mail. I got my “welcome to Medicare” brochure a full four months after actually getting on the damn thing. Luckily my actual card and prescription coverage info came much faster than that, but I just want to really illustrate what a mess this system is.

Paying for Medicare

Your Medicare coverage may not be free. With standard Medicare, you’re given specific monthly premiums, deductibles, copays, and more based on your income level.

SOMETHING NICE: In my case, there are no costs for my coverage this year; I think this is a kindness extended to ease the transition. I’m personally likely to save money this way, but another patient might potentially save by moving straight to a (paid) Part C plan.

Saving money and accessing doctors with Part C

My heart sank a bit when I first looked at what I had been given: Medicare isn’t really “one size fits all” in terms of price or coverage, and certainly wasn’t a good match for me.

Luckily, we have Part C to compensate for that. The government essentially contracts out to other insurance providers for Part C, so that folks can find a different mix of fees and coverage that better suits their medical needs.

So, you’re going to have some kind of coverage from day one. But once you get your wits about you, it’s definitely worth looking at your options in the Part C “marketplace.” In fact, Medicare.gov has a handy tool that’ll let you enter in your prescriptions, doctors, and more. Then the site will spit out the most advantageous plans for you.

Getting other/additional insurance

You might not be happy with any of your options under Medicare—and unfortunately, being on Medicare means you can’t buy coverage on the insurance marketplace.

That being said, there are some programs out there that’ll help you out.

A great example is Medicaid Buy-in Programs for disabled folks who work (even the tiniest bit, as long as you claim the income on your taxes). This does have resource limits, though, so don’t get too excited until you’ve figured out what kind of backpay you’re getting.

What else is out there? It really depends on your situation and your state. Your best bet is to contact your state’s DHS (mentioned below) and ask them to help you identify your options.

Getting help

As I’m sure you’ve gathered by now, Medicare is an old system that’s been rebuilt, patched, and painted over—and navigating it (especially in conjunction with other benefits) can be a bit of a nightmare.

Luckily, there are programs that can help! Getting connected with them should be one of the first things on your to do list after getting on disability. Here are the two major ones that I was encouraged to work with:

State Health Insurance Assistance Programs (SHIP) - This is a resource center and network of advisors meant to specifically help you navigate public insurance options. You can find your state’s program here. Oregon’s program, SHIBA, has a volunteer come visit you and explain how Medicare works—and honestly, this visit is what enabled me to make sense of all of this enough to write an article about it!

Your state’s Department of Human Services (DHS) - specifically, their senior and disability program - Once you register with them, they can help you access additional support programs, including insurance and food stamps. They may know about programs you aren’t aware of, so it’s worth filling out the form and getting a quick case review.

Other things to look out for when you get on disability

[Only one item for now. I’ll fill in more as the surprises hit.]

This year’s taxes are gonna be weird. Depending on your financial situation, you may want to get the paid version of TurboTax or get a tax consultant in on things. The short version, though, is that you can choose to modify previous years’ taxes to incorporate the backpay you received, or claim it all on your coming tax forms.

…and that’s what I learned from my hard fall. I truly hope it helps you avoid the stress I dealt with, or at least anticipate it more adequately.

Did you have a “hard fall”? Do you have advice to add to this? Do feel free to comment with your experience or contact me with any additions!

❤️, Editor Diane

#spoonie #chronic illness #disability #invisible illness #chronic life #ssd #ssdi #advice #money #insurance #medicaid #medicare #ship #dhs #original content

[c-is-for-circinate]

It occurs to me that I promised y’all I’d tell you stories from the D&D campaign I’m running, and it’s now been a week since the first session, so I should definitely do some of that!  I can already tell it’s going to be a fun-as-shit campaign.  If nothing else, my party and I are collectively five variably-queer ladies who met at knitting group and range in age from “haven’t played D&D since 2e at GenCon in the 90′s” to “too young to remember fandom before AO3 existed”.  We’re real fucking cool.  I am going to have to explain, in detail, so many textiles and other interesting crafts.

I am a WORDY-ASS MOTHERFUCKER, so the whole tale will probably get pretty long in the telling, but: welcome to the continent of Nokomoris, on a world that probably has its own name but I haven’t decided on it yet because naming things is hard, dude.

[here’s where I will probably link game session posts in the future once they exist]

Hark, a backstory!  (And, our four players)

IF YOU RECOGNIZE THIS CAMPAIGN INFO BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING IT, CONSIDER YOURSELF UNDER DM ORDERS TO BACK OFF AND STOP READING.  I KNOW YOU FUCKERS ARE ON TUMBLR TOO, THERE IS A REASON I DIDN’T GIVE YOU MY HANDLE.  (I love you all very much and yes, there are spoilers in here.  Go away and text me now.)

Eastern Nokomoris, where our story takes place (or at least begins) is in a prosperous age of thriving city-states and collapsed kingdoms.  Most trade, culture, and even centralized government is based among the Nine Cities, massive metropolises located around the Attiks Sea and nearby lands.  Nearly a million people live in the nine cities, which are connected to each other via well-established sea and land trade routes, and also by what many are calling the most important technological/magical development of the modern age: a network of massive permanent teleportation circles, thirty feet in diameter.

The circle network is big enough to carry large trade wagons, livestock, huge parties of people, and even troops and war machines.  Sea and land trade has dropped by half between the Nine Cities in the past fifteen years, and continues to decline.  The cities themselves are thriving and prosperous, and it’s easier than ever to get beef and leather from Karna Vi, wool from Yefira, pottery from Celkan or metalwork from Tiers no matter where you live.

Outside of the cities, it’s another story.  Dozens of once-prosperous kingdoms, and even the whole of the Trava Empire, have fallen in the past seventy years: first during the Church Wars, and then in the yeas of chaos and rebuilding once the Wars were over.  Small towns everywhere that once paid taxes to a crown, and were protected in turn by royal troops and much-needed aid in times of hardship, have been left entirely to stand or fall on their own.  Some have thrived, becoming local centers of trade for whole coalitions of abandoned towns nearby.  Others have disappeared, died out, or simply faded into the wilderness, forgotten.  The great open plains of Highnorth where the Trava Empire once ruled, the endless golden sea of the Southgrass, the peaks and valleys of the Thavine Mountains, the deep many-colored forest of the Iris Peninsula--who knows what’s out there any more?

And in the Midlands, where the worst of the Church Wars took place...well, precious few towns even survived to rebuild in the first place.  Land that once held the most fertile farms in all Nokomoris is desolate now, scarred and cursed.  Most of the battlefield has been picked over by intrepid adventurers and out-of-work soldiers in the six decades since the Wars ended, already raided for magic and treasure.  The ruins remain, and the valleys where nothing will ever grow again, and the eternal shadow over the once-Holy City, and who knows what sorts of twisted things living in places people no longer go?

But it’s been sixty years since the Church Wars ended, and for most people, life is good.  Small-town farmers may no longer have the protection of any crown, but small technological advancements in plow design and crop rotation mean that they can produce more food than they need and sell the extra in the nearest city for coin.  More and more young people, freed from heavy labor on their parents’ farms, have learned reading, writing, history, and some amount of arcane talent.  The Grand Universities in the nine cities are thriving, full of scholars of all ages eager to learn and advance the course of knowledge everywhere.

Of course, there are ten times more scholars in the Grand Universities than there are professorships or other high-ranking positions to hire them to...and that is where our story begins.

.

Our intrepid party thus far includes:

Marion, a human paladin of indeterminate gender, whose human family stands among the nobles of the great city of Karna Vi, where our story begins.  Marion is an acolyte of the Church of Lost Things, which concerns itself with every god that does not easily fit within the purview of the other seven Churches, and also with every god that has been erased or forgotten by time (for all gods deserve worship, and all gods are capable of smiting those that neglect them, sooner or later).  They’re also a math major, largely because computer science hasn’t been invented yet.

Marion’s really hoping to be able to build and program a simple computing machine, a la Babbage’s Difference Engine (or Arthur C. Clarke’s The Nine Billion Names of God), to tabulate and generate all the possible names of every god ever to exist, which seems much more efficient than just combing piecemeal broken historical records trying to find them.  It has not been going well.  In a Church system where paladins are often more concerned with protecting people from the gods than for the gods, cracking this problem will let Marion figure out who the gods even are like nobody ever before.  But there are variables missing, and theomathematical constants they can’t even identify yet, let alone calculate--and they’re not going to find here.

Three interesting facts about Marion, as per their player: 

They once spent an entire week holed up in a lab over a holiday break and were declared missing-presumed-dead.  Police searches were involved.  It was a little bit of a scandal.

They are by far the most unremarkable and constantly forgotten member of their entire family.  (This perhaps says more about their family than about them.)

Everyone on campus is fairly sure they interfered with the campus clock tower specifically to give students more time on finals last semester.  This is false.  They were trying to run a different experiment entirely, messed with the clock tower by accident, and didn’t actually notice it was finals week even after it was over.

Kevin, an elf barbarian sportsball champion, hero of the university’s sportsball team for the past ten years straight.  Kevin is a foot and a half taller than any self-respecting elf ought to be, not to mention twice as broad.  He’s finally starting to acknowledge the fact that there is, in fact, no NFElf, and you can’t be a “professional sportsballer” within the Elven Ascendancy, and his bemused parents would really like him to do something with his life beyond playing those little games with the ball and all of those...non-elf people.

Kevin is also an art history student, mostly out of desire for an easy major that’ll make his parents happy while he happily spends most of his time out on the sportsball field.  He’s got high strength, basic middle intelligence, and negative wisdom.  He’s sat through more history classes than the entire rest of the party put together.  He understands approximately none of it.  Still--he can’t do sports forever, and art history makes his parents happy, and he might as well go on a quest to uncover lost art and artifacts and maybe prove he’s an actual adult sooner than later, right?

Three interesting facts about Kevin, as per his player:

Back in his home city playing little league sportsball, there were definite (and accurate) rumors about this wild elf that could and would straight-up squish opposing players.  That’s how the college recruiters found him in the first place.  It’s definitely why they wanted him.

He has so many groupies.  So many.  They come in so many different species and genders and Kevin is on board with every single one.  (On board?  On bed?  On convenient flat surface?  Does it particularly matter?  Not to Kevin!)

Kevin is covered in tattoos, and there are all sorts of rumors about what sort of eldritch magic they hold--like, that panther is probably a real panther bound by elven magic, right?  A pretty persistent rumor suggests that the tattoos all commemorate individual opposing team members he’s...either hospitalized or fucked, or both, literally nobody is sure.  (In point of fact, none of the above are true, and Kevin just has terrible taste in tattoos and a pretty stunning lack of both impulse control and supervision--but why quash the stories?)

Kou, a halfling bard whose girlfriend just left three weeks ago on a research expedition of her own, taking with her approximately 85% of Kou’s impulse control.  In theory, Kou is an alchemy major, studying science to make her scholar parents happy.  In practice, she probably spends more time sneaking into music seminars and/or busking on the street for spare change than actually doing alchemy, but her girlfriend was a Good Responsible Influence who made sure Kou didn’t get kicked out of the department, and to be fair, alchemy can blow things up sometimes so that’s always good.

Kou doesn’t so much have plans for the future as vague, contradictory aspirations, but that doesn’t mean she’s not smart.  She’s learned enough magic to use a set of recording stones to play, loop, and modulate beats or bits of music, thereby making her Nokomoris’s very first DJ, and she really wants to be a professional musician someday.  She just hasn’t figured out how to reconcile her dreams with her parents’ wishes, the lives they’ve worked so hard to create, or a halfling cultural legacy that has more to do with riding around snowfields covered in furs waving spears than it does with brightly-colored house parties.

Three interesting facts about Kou, as per her player:

Kou very definitely once spent a full day dressed up in halfling traditional garb, furs and all, including a very fuzzy fur hat.  It wasn’t until that evening that somebody saw the hat move and everyone realized she’d been wearing a curled-up live fox the whole time.

She once managed to create an incredibly destructive compound in alchemy lab out of ingredients that should not have actually been able to react that way.  She found out it was corrosive when she accidentally spilled it on six months’ worth of a different professor’s lab notes.  (She got an A anyway, because her lab professor hated the other guy, but that has more to do with Professors Ayanova and M’tiersi than Kou, really.)

She absolutely goes down to counter-protest every damn time those Family First assholes try to rally downtown in favor of child-producing (read: heterosexual, single-species) families.  Rumor says she once broke her guitar over a protester’s head, which horrifies her--Kou’s guitar is the most expensive thing she owns!  She used their own protest sign, like a sensible person.

Reigenleif, a mostly-female-probably gnome rogue known around campus as “Beer Run” for her skills at somehow always having access to better and cheaper beer than anyone else, and her general willingness to deliver to parties (for a small additional fee).  Reigenleif’s parents are small-time forgers who ended up mostly working for a local crime organization after a series of bad luck and political upheavals brought them to Karna Vi a few decades ago.  They really want their kids to go clean, avoid all the uncertainties and occasional jail sentences/executions that accompany a life of crime, and maybe make a little something of themselves.  Reigenleif, who has zero interest in staying on the right side of the law, mostly does odd jobs for a different, not-technically-rival criminal organization, and carefully does not tell her parents about it, ever.

Technically she’s an engineering major, and she’s more than got the brains for it, plus the accompanying curiosity about metallurgy and arcane artificing.  Still, she spends most of her time helpfully involving herself in other peoples’ projects rather than running her own.  (Her own projects have a lot more to do with figuring out new forging techniques and criminal tricks, and don’t look very good in the end-of-year department report.)  Enjoys causing trouble, not being in it.

Three interesting facts about Reigenleif, as per her player:

She absolutely owns a copy of the provost’s signet ring, which she can and has used to create documents allowing herself access to all sorts of University resources.  Like most things, she’ll share the use of it, quietly, for a price.  (She also owns a copy of Marion’s family signet ring, which is a much longer story that I as the DM do not know yet--can’t wait for that.)

Once captured and maneuvered a live swan into somebody’s office to cause as much chaos as possible so Reigenleif could get up to something somewhere else.  Is a little bit of a legend for it.

Aside from her not-actually-that-impressive family legacy of crime, Reigenleif’s spread a quiet rumor around school that she’s descended from the famous marauding pirate, Thrand Slender-Leg.  It’s possible that Thrand Slender-Leg never actually existed.  It’s possible that nobody had ever heard of him before Reigenleif made him up.  She’s certainly not telling.

#C the DM #dungeons and dragons #The Yarn Crew goes adventuring

[barbariccia]

well, before we jet off anywhere, we better drop in on our friends old and new, the ones we’ll be directly working with.

hey, joker, how’s the new normandy treating you? any lingering ptsd from watching your old friend and commander get spaced saving you from the same fate? feel ready to fly? excellent!

Joker: Can you believe this, Commander? It’s my baby, better than new! It fits me like a glove! And leather seats! Military may set the hardware standard, but on a first-gen frigate they could care less if the seats breathe. Civilian sector comfort by design.

EDI: The reproduction is not intended to be perfect, Mr. Moreau. Seamless improvements were made.

joker........... does not like EDI. EDI is a blip in the machine to him, an ultimately unnecessary addition to the thing he considers to be his real arms and legs, so to speak. and EDI has terminals all over the ship, including one right next to joker, which communicates with him regarding piloting necessities that a human can’t manage in even half the time it manages.

worth noting, by the way, that despite EDI’s blobby avatar, it’s designed to have a feminine voice; a little lower than might be considered traditionally feminine and echoing with robotic undertones, but feminine nonetheless. it is very easy to consider EDI a she from just its voice alone, but at the end of the day it’s an AI, completely synthetic.

Joker: We’re staying, though, right? I mean, this seat is real leather.

Shepard: Good to see you’re keeping it all in perspective, Joker.

Joker: Uh, leather.

he spins away from you, but we grab the back of the chair - metaphorically speaking - and yank him right back. not so fast, mister, it’s been two years. the first thing we ask is how he feels about the normandy, has he settled in? and he wants to put it through its paces, to find out just how similar it feels to fly. EDI chimes in to say that it’s against safety standards - you know, those things that joker flew us right into the heart of during the battle of the citadel.

Joker: Commander, can we shut this thing off? I don’t need it in my day-to-day.

Shepard: If you don’t want to hear it, turn the damn sound off.

Joker: That doesn’t change anything. It’s still watching. Like some creepy kid staring at the back of your head in comp-sci. You just want to... punch him. But he’s “special” and sets fires or something.

Joker: ...Okay, a little too far there, but you know what I mean.

well, good to see that the old joke of “people with disabilities hate other people with different disabilities” still rings strong.

you go right ahead.

next we ask him about the good old days, because... well. it’s been two years for him, sure, but i guess shep’s still trying to adjust to that.

Joker: They seem like the good old days now, but come on. It was hell at the time. Geth, Saren, Sovereign. And then we got dumped. We’re stuck in a weird place, sure, but back then it wasn’t all sunshine and bunnies.

Shepard: What happened to the rest of the old crew? I heard most survived.

Joker: Most did. Pressly didn’t. The rest of us just sort of drifted apart. The Alliance didn’t care. I don’t think they liked all the non-humans in your crew. We were your team, Commander. With the Normandy destroyed and you gone, there wasn’t much keeping us together.

yeah, we really were the glue holding the team in place. a real shame - but then, there’s no reason for them to have stayed. not the non-humans, anyway, which is a sweet term and one that i’m getting on board with immediately, because i’ve never liked the term “aliens” in a galaxy where... well, humans are also technically aliens from a different perspective!

Shepard: What about the people we’re picking up?

Joker: Well... I would never say anything against Miranda. And expect to survive the reprisal. And Jacob is way too nice a guy for the number of ways he knows how to kill people. Uh, that’s just my opinion, though. There’s really no need to go spreading it around.

like i’ve mentioned before - yeah, they really do both feel like kaidan and ashley replacements, but weaker, too. miranda’s closed-off just for the sake of being closed-off at this point, rather than ashley’s mistrust of non-humans but willingness to fight with them if ordered to, and... okay, jacob and kaidan actually have a fair amount in common insofar as “nice dudes, also deadly dudes”. jacob doesn’t have a little bouffant, which is a point in his favour, imo.

hell, while i’m here i’ll talk to EDI.

Shepard: I want to know more about the people I’m working with.

EDI: Much of that data is classified. Do you have a specific inquiry?

HOO boy EDI ain’t wrong about that! almost everything you can ask her won’t net you answers; it merely tells you that there’s a block preventing it from giving you the information you seek. it does, however, give you some basic info on cerberus.

EDI: Cerberus is organized into task-oriented cells. Each operates in isolation. Members from one cell cannot recognize the members of another. Each cell’s agents are led by a single operator. We are called the Lazarus cell, which is directed by Operator Lawson.

that’s miranda.

well, our other questions are blocked, so fuck it. how you getting on, EDI?

EDI: Mr. Moreau does not trust me. It offends him that I am installed aboard “his ship’s” computers.

Joker: Yeah, the last Normandy did just fine without an AI reminding me the airlock is ajar.

you can ask it about the meaning behind its name (an acronym of Enhanced Defense Intelligence), and what it does, which is electronics operation, weapons guidance and jamming ... and collection of data for TIM, which we shouldn’t be surprised about. it also has hidden achievements; items it’s programmed for that even EDI doesn’t know what their function is, due to some of its hardware being kept offline. it’s happy (???) enough to work for us, though, since organic beings will never be as quick as AI tech.

EDI: This is a role that can only be filled by an Artificial Intelligence. Unfortunately, we are suspect.

Joker: Might have something to do with how an AI almost destroyed galactic civilization. Just putting it out there.

ok, lovebirds, enjoy your married life.

joker isn’t the only member of the original crew, actually. go down to the medical bay, and you’ll be met with none other than karin chakwas, who was notable in me1 for... uh, telling us about kaidan’s migraines.

Shepard: I’m shocked. You’re serving on a Cerberus vessel now?

Chakwas: Surprising, even to me. Yet, here I am.

Chakwas: The kind of trauma you endured would’ve changed most people, but not you, I see. Welcome back, Shepard.

uh, let’s not get too hasty there.

chakwas is set up comfortably enough, serviced by all the equipment she needs, but she’s missing private reserves of... whatever supplies. she’s also missing a bottle of brandy that she was saving “for a special occasion”, and we can promise we’ll keep an eye out to replace for her if we can see it.

Shepard: Doctor, you’ve been with the Alliance for years. Why leave now?

Chakwas: After the Normandy was lost, the surviving crew was reassigned. I was stationed at the Mars Naval Medical Center. A very respectable position, but it wasn’t on a starship. I’ve spent most of my life on war ships, never knowing what the next mission might bring. I’m used to the hum of engines, the creaking of bulkheads, that subtle vertigo when the momentum dampeners kick in. Life planet-side is just too static, too boring.

Shepard: You’re not the Cerberus type, though.

Chakwas: I don’t work for Cerberus; I work for you -- on a mission that may be crucial to the survial of the human race. I have faith that your dealings with Cerberus will be ethical. I trust you, Commander.

uh... sure, i guess.

Shepard: There’s a very good chance this mission will be one-way only. Are you prepared for that?

Chakwas: I’ve been through the Reclaiming of Shanxi, the Skyllian Blitz... We survived the Battle of the Citadel and the destruction of the Normandy together. I’ve lived a full life -- no regrets. I’d like to make sure the crew gets the same opportunity.

this is way too much responsibility, oh boy. oh boy!!!!

#mol plays me2 #squad: joker

[intersex-ionality]

Hi. I'm thinking about converting to Judaism and was wondering of you could point me in the direction of any blogs/articles/sites that are... I was gonna say 'general knowledge' but really /any/ info about Judaism and/or Jewish culture. Thank you.

My number one tip, given the conservative and orthodox propaganda that dominates tumblr and most other US spaces that talk about judaism without being explicitly and exclusively Jewish, is to look for reform, humanistic and reconstructionist jewish information. Given that I’m a Jewish Atheist, I haven’t got a strong understanding of the Renewal movement, however, I’ve never seen shitfuckery coming from it.

Unlike the conservative and orthodox movements.

Like. Do you know who the most famous fucking orthodox jew in the US is right now? It’s Ben fuckdamn Shapiro, and frankly, while it’s hardly the Orthodox movement’s responsibility to reign his shit ass in, there’s not nearly as much open disapproval of his fuckery as there should be. And, much like any conservative movement, a disproportionate number of well known orthodox and conservative Jews aligning themselves with modern fascism does not surprise me.

In short,  I have no patience for the conservative or orthodox Jewish movements, nor do I have any patience for people who put rhetoric and propaganda originating from those movements in front of me and pretend like they’re representative of the entire Jewish population.

I strongly urge anyone considering conversion to avoid these movements if at all possible. And that includes blocking out the so-called “progressive” open orthodox movement.

Personally, I favour reconstructionist Judaism.

I feel that even reform judaism has allowed itself to fall out of line with modern realities regarding interpersonal relationships, personal identity, and politics. But the reform movement is massive (and thus diverse), and you’re likely to have access to it even when you don’t have access to anything else. I have no real beef with reform judaism as a practice or a study, unlike conservative and orthodox judaism which are formally invited to suck my progressive goddamn ass.

So. With my absolute frothing hatred for conservatism of all types, including the Jewish kind firmly established.

First and foremost, hit up the Reconstructionist Temple directory, (and the directories of other movements that interest you!) and see if there’s a temple near you.

Independent and group driven studies in an informal setting like the internet are great and important parts of both the conversion process and, in my opinion, of practicing Judaism. But you cannot replace the value of actually participating in your local Jewish community.

I’ve never run into a reconstructionist temple that refused access to even non-converting gentiles. And participating in your local temple’s services, studies, and social outreach is a fantastic first step. It gives you a chance to surround yourself with Jewish culture and learn by doing, rather than by reading. It also gives you access to people (like your local rabbi, but also just the members of the temple in general) who will help you find the answers to your questions.

If there’s not a reconstructionist temple nearby, try a Jewish Community Center, or JCC. These places, kind of the the Christian YMCA/YWCA, are community centers first and foremost, and religious spaces secondly. But, where there’s a lot of Jews hanging out, there’s a lot of Judaism happening. You can’t go wrong with getting a gym or swimming membership with a JCC and just hanging around making friends. My local JCC even has an entire program of fitness classes, including pool times, specifically for neurodivergent adults, which like, that’s so super specific and super cool. 

In terms of reference materials that aren’t tied to community living, Exploring Judaism: A Reconstructionist Approach is a textbook that was updated fairly recently as far as religious studies books go. Most libraries in the US that I’ve looked at either already have a copy available, or have access to one through circulation exchanges, and it’s a good, solid foundation to build from.

Having originally been written in the 1980s and updated in the late 90s, there’s plenty that’s out of date in it, but it’s a strong foundation and reference point. Just remember when you’re reading it: it’s between 20 and 40 years old. The sections on Queer identity in particular tend to use phrasings that, today, has been rejected as archaic and inappropriate. Not disrespectfully or even in a way that diminishes queer identities by accident. But there can be some discomfort in reading older terms like “transsexual” even in academic period pieces.

A quick and easy way to see if your local library has a copy is to install the Library Extension for chrome or firefox, set it up with your local library’s book lists, then check this amazon link. Remember to include any college or student libraries you have access too, which are even more likely to have this in stock, being a text book and all.

My Jewish Learning is a popular resource website among reform and reconstructionist Jews, and I’ve never had a bad time with them, but I want to emphasize that I’m not a regular reader of their work. Nonetheless, I have referenced their work with regards to the intersection of Queer and Jewish identities quite regularly and will probably continue to do so.

Now, I’m also going to make a recommendation here for something I personally have not used, but which I know is highly popular and also in many way highly necessary if you’re a Jew or Convert who is heavily entrenched in politics, justice, and activism.

Hashivenu is a podcast about how Jewish identity intersects with political activism, and about how spiritual practice can help soothe the overwhelming depression and horror that comes with living in a world ruled by people who seem furiously bent on destroying it.

It features a lot of intersectional discussions about what Jewish people can do to embrace and support our more marginalized members, as well as to make ourselves better allies to non-Jewish social movements. It also features a lot of optimism and uplifting, the help motivate you on your path as a Jew and as an activist for a wide variety of seemingly overwhelming causes.

#Judaism #conversion #Anonymous