#biphobia tw

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I came out as bisexual, and everyone started avoiding me. But I weaponized that repulsion, like magnets with the same polarity, I walked into crowds and people got pushed away by an invisible force.

#dream #coming out #bisexual #homophobia tw #biphobia tw #bisexuality

[hoolay-boobs]

“What do you mean there’s still so much biphobia in fan spaces? Bisexuals are like some of the most popular characters!”

Yeah, and they either get treated like this:

Or like this:

“Biphobia isn’t real” neither are your braincells

#bisexuals deserve better #biphobia tw #biphobia #bisexual #bisexuality #listen not to post this rancid post on bi visibility month but part of bi visibility month is venting about biphobia and that’s okay #long tags #bisexual characters are constantly branded as either gay/lesbian or straight because bisexuality is constantly branded as never good enough #yes harlivy are sometimes fetishized by men who want to get off on seeing girls smooch. yes sometimes these men are the writers of dc #no they do not make up 100% of harlivy content. no gross men drooling over harlivy doesn’t immediately make harlivy straight #harlivy have had queer female writers before. a huge portion of their fanbase are queer girls #just because they are occasionally festished doesn’t mean that they aren’t good bi rep #I see where this person is coming from but no. bc REAL BI WOMEN get festishized by men and that won’t make their sexuality any less valid #would you tell these real girls that they’re actually straight since ‘sapphicness isn’t sapphicness once it’s taken advantage of by men’? #glimmer lesbian content makes me sad bc it’s not even like interpreting harlivy or korrasami as lesbians assuming all wlw is solely lesbian #but also erasing her entire romance with bow. degrading it down to comphet and ignoring bow #like I can at least understand mistakening poison ivy for a lesbian but glimmer?? glimmer??! #biphobic #biphobic tw #bisexual hardships #korrasami #harlivy #glimbow #bi #fucking essay in the tags

[star-anise]

Yo, can someone call my husband for me? I don't have his number.

Honestly didn't know I had a husband, but the terfs who have been sending me hatemail over my sapphic bisexual content seem very certain that he exists. Honestly it feels kinda sus that he's been hanging out with them so much, and not my friends.

...Oh god, did I marry a transphobe in my sleep?!

#ranting in bisexual #terf shit #lgbt discourse #biphobia tw #transphobia tw

[samble-moved]

Sayaka is Biyaka (or, a Lesbian Tries to Disprove the "Sayaka is a Lesbian With Comphet" Bi Erasure Theory)

For some reason, there's a loooot of belief in the PMMM fandom (this was especially bad in the mid 2010s) that Sayaka isn't bi (despite her canon, on screen romantic interested in both Kyosuke, a guy, and Kyoko, a girl), she's "just" a lesbian struggling with compulsive heterosexuality.

While many lesbians do struggle with comphet, erasing Sayaka's status as bi/pan/omni/mspec to claim she's a lesbian is...not great!

Usual signs of comphet include, but are not limited to:

Only attraction to guys involves ones who are entirely unobtainable (ex. a celebrity, fictional, etc)

Any man you fantasize about is faceless/nameless

Interest in men in theory, but not practice

"Choosing" a man to have a crush on to seem "normal", or because it's expected

Attraction based on logic, not actual emotion (ex. because your parents would approve)

Liking a guy until they return the interest

Being attracted to certain guys just because of something like a talent

(...and more examples here!)

However, Sayaka's attraction to Kyosuke doesn't seem based on any of these, but seems more to be genuine attraction/interest.

For one, Sayaka has been close to Kyosuke ever since she was a child. They're described and shown as childhood friends, and he isn't a guy Sayaka "just met" and "chose" to be into.

Sayaka also just isn't into Kyosuke at a surface level. If she held no true attraction towards him, why would she willingly trade her relatively safe, happy life for his happiness? Her wish was to heal his hand. While this was the stated wish, it's outright shown that Sayaka didn't just want that. It's outright shown canonically that, while not fully said, Sayaka wants Kyosuke's appreciation and recognition for this. She wants him to know the miracle was her doing, and wants him to love her for doing it.

The various interpretions of this won't be majorly touched here, as whether or not Sayaka's thinking there is "selfish" isn't important. What is important is that Sayaka shows a true level of attraction to Kyosuke, and wishes it was reciprocated.

It's not that she "just" likes him for his skills (she still visits him in the hospital, even during a time where it's implied that he won't be able to play his violin again). It's not that he's a guy out of reach — he's a childhood friend. She's not being pressured into liking guys. She literally jokes about Madoka being her wife in front of Hitomi, publicly.

Her feelings are obvious and genuine enough that Hitomi tells Sayaka that, if she wants, she will give Sayaka a day to confess to Kyosuke before Hitomi does.

A bisexual person who ends up later liking someone of the same gender later on isn't "actually gay" instead. A bisexual person with a preference isn't "choosing a side". Erasing a canon bisexual character's identity to claim "ummm, akshully, 🤓 they're Really X sexuality instead" is biphobic!

I'm probably not the best person to make this post, as I am a lesbian, not bisexual. However, people erasing a bi character's sexuality to call them a lesbian instead is not okay, and it wouldn't be okay the other way around either. It's not "progressive" to insist a bi character can't possibly be bi, they have to be gay. Sayaka shows no sign of comphet, no sign of "just" likely Kyosuke because she feels it's "right". She shows actual, real interest in him and Kyoko, and that doesn't make her "actually a lesbian". She's bisexual. A character being bi isn't some stepping stone to them being "really" gay later on, and it isn't a dirty word to call them bi! It's an identity like any other.

Most fans ignore Kyosuke. This isn't something I think is a major issue, as Sayaka seems to lose interest in him after Rebellion (saying Hitomi deserves better). He's probably not the best guy. But that's not an excuse to erase Sayaka's identity, because she liked a not-so-great dude. A lesbian with a shitty ex isn't suddenly not a lesbian, and a bisexual person with a less than stellar former crush isn't suddenly not bisexual due to it.

Tl;dr:

#pmmm #madoka magica #sayaka miki #sayaka #biphobia tw #bi erasure tw #meta #long post

[anti-spop]

the spop fandom is so biphobic, like, they'll praise g/limbow but still insist they're straight and not bisexual. the same counts for entrapdak and i guess r/epkylonnie (even if to me it's not canon, you'll see ppl shitting on kyle for being straight when he rlly isn't)

#i post #spop critical #anti stans #biphobia tw #i guess seamista doesn't count here bc sea hawk canonically has an ex-boyfriend (or more than one?) #but the other ones are all 'straight'

[sillywetkittenincardboardbox]

i think we need to support characters in stories having changing gender identities.

i feel like people in fandoms are soo hung up over the ideas that "he *has* to be bisexual because he kissed a woman once" or that "they CANT be aromantic/asexual/aroace because they dated someone!"

no!! they can be! people change, and i feel like forcing characters to be one thing or another solely because this or that is harmful to us!

i think it reflects in tbe way we treat people!

someone who says stuff like

"CHARACTER cant be LESBIAN because she kissed a boy earlier in the series!"

"CHARACTER cant be AROMANTIC because they(re) DATED/DATING someone!"

"CHARACTER cant be BISEXUAL because theyve only shown intrest in BOYS"

"CHARACTER cant be NONBINARY because they use THESE PRONOUNS!"

will be more inclined to say

"Oh! Susan cant be a lesbian because she dated that fine lad awhile back!"

"Aha, Brian isnt nonbinary because he uses he/him pronouns!"

stuff like that!!

pleasepleaseplease i just think we need more representation of like. characters who think theyre one flag/sexuality/gender but realise theyre another.

i also think we need to keep this in mind!!

also this does not apply to characters like willow who have been confirmed as pansexual.

[aholotte]

more proof that terfs hate mspec lesbians. can you not put this shit in the tags jfc. and of course they hate bi people in general

anyways make sure to block museumofautogynephilia

#terf tw #radfem tw #exclus tw #biphobia tw #stelliphobia tw

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Yesterday, May 17th 2022, on International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia, this rainbow bench was placed in Zrinjevac park, Zagreb, Croatia to promote diversity and tolerance.

Within three hours, a man was caught painting over it with black paint.

The bench was vandalized but the workers in charge of the park area repainted it immediately and within hours, the bench was back in its place and in rainbow colors again.

Today, the bench is gone. It was supposed to be there for just one day to begin with, and it was vandalized within hours. This is just sad.

The rainbow flag on another location was vandalized as well and is now broken.

#not a dream #homophobia tw #transphobia tw #biphobia tw #discrimination

[wkrpinne]

You come to post made by a bisexual woman and tell me that when I label a character whose had proven interest in men and women as bisexual it’s disappointing and tell me I’m the one being exclusionary? Yeah okay lol.

#biphobia tw #gen v #marie moreau #jordan li #limoreau

[whackacole3]

i need people to realize that mercy is basically CANONICALLY bi/pan. she isn’t straight and she isn’t a lesbian.

i’m tired of people excusing these headcanons because apparently since blizzard hasn’t confirmed it, it can’t be canon or at the very least implied.

she has CANONICAL attraction to both genji and pharah. a man and a woman. what does that mean? bi/pan.

blizzard doesn’t need to confirm it when the proof is right there in the pudding. in the literal game itself. IT IS CANON.

it’s bi/pan erasure to headcanon her as anything else. i really need people to realize that.

#overwatch #overwatch 2 #mercy #mercy overwatch #angela ziegler #tw biphobia #biphobia tw #biphobia #tw panphobia #panphobia tw #panphobia

[hoolay-boobs]

When bisexual girls are in relationships with men, we’re assumed to be heterosexual. That being interested in women never mattered, that if we’re in a straight-passing relationship, we’re straight now.

The thing that a lot of ppl don’t realize, is that when we’re with a girl, it doesn’t magically undo the bi-erasure. Now, bisexual girls are assumed to be lesbians. Now, being interested in men never mattered, a bisexual girl in a lesbian-passing relationship is lesbian now.

We get erased from all sides. Poison Ivy gets the same treatment irl bisexuals do, and it’s aggravating to see even a beloved fictional character get her identity erased.

#bi erasure #bi erasure tw #bisexual #bisexuality #poison ivy #pamela isley #dr pamela isley #biphobia tw #biphobic #biphobic tw #biphobia #dc #dcu #dc comics #dc comix #I did edit the reddit comment but only bc I cut out an irrelevant sentence. all of this was in the og comment #harley quinn the animated series #harley quinn tv series #harlivy #harley quinn x poison ivy #poison ivy x batman #bisexualism #bi

[star-anise]

Pulling a piece out of an already massive post to reply to @zenosanalytic :

Most of this is great, but I feel like this overstates the influence and power of exclusionists; they never took over either Feminist or Lesbian groups or turned them en masse against bisexuals and transpeople, at least not in the US(in Britain it's an accurate description from what I've read). They def were still there, TRYING to(they were majorly annoying in the Fair scene), and you'd meet them or lesbian-separatists moving in wider queer circles, but they were pretty consistently losing that fight especially in academic and political queer orgs and, by the 00s, were pretty much irrelevant. They stayed that way until the Conservative movement deliberately revived/coopted them in the 10s.

Because... here's the bit from the original post I think this is talking about:

That process of expelling bi women from lesbian groups with immense prejudice continues to this day and leaves scars on a lot of bi/pan people. A lot of bisexuals, myself included, have an experience of “double discrimination”; we are made to feel unwelcome or invisible both in straight society, and in LGBT spaces.

It is absolutely true that radfems did not succeed in making exclusionary politics the mainstream policy of LGBT institutions. Hooowever. That's not what I was talking about.

Most people do not engage with the LGBTQ+ community solely by, like... walking into a policy meeting at GLAAD. Generally we do things like finding LGBTQ+ content on social media, or by attending LGBTQ+ social events, or by trying to find people to date!

In those settings, groups that are minoritized within the LGBTQ+ community (bi, pan, m-spec, ace, aro, trans, nb, etc) experience being treated in ways that are invalidating or derogatory. Not all the time! #notalllesbians!! The majority of the community might actually be kind and welcoming, and it might be relatively small microaggressions. But those microaggressions can happen often enough, and in a context where not much is being done to show that we are valued by the community, to create a sense of wariness and unwelcome in a space that ought to be safe for us.

I didn't attend a single LGBTQ+ event, or try to date a single woman, my entire undergrad career, because when I was 16, the first real-life gays and lesbians I ever met laughed and joked, in my hearing, about how bisexual teenage girls are just sluts who are doing it for the attention, not actually gay. It's not that I believed them, since they were obviously wrong; it's just that I went, "Oh okay, so LGBT spaces are still ones where I'll be bullied and shit-talked. I absolutely cannot deal with any more of that, so I'll just never go into those spaces."

Mine is a very small story. There are a lot of little stories like mine, and also ones big enough that they'd look exclusionary even to an outside observer. I know people who actually did get pushed out of their college GSAs, or lost their whole social support network, or had people try to coerce them into thinking they were horrible misguided tools of the patriarchy, in LGBT spaces, because they were bi, pan, m-spec, ace, aro, trans, nb, etc.

If you'd clicked the link in the post labelled "double discrimination", you'd read an NBC article that says, in part:

“This study adds to the growing body of research confirming that bisexual people face unique mental health disparities [that are] closely related to stigma and discrimination [they face] from straight, gay and lesbian communities,” Heron Greenesmith, a senior policy analyst at LGBTQ advocacy organization Movement Advancement Project, said.

(Note: this means "unique" as compared to gays and lesbians, which have been the focus of most mental health research and practice in this area. Namely, bisexuals tend to face certain pressures as a group that cis gays and lesbians don't so much. It does not mean "unique" as in "only bisexuals experience this". Bisexuals are just one of many groups that feel unwelcome or unsafe in LGBTQ+ spaces they ought to belong in.

Maybe you didn't mean to imply that all these experiences didn't happen. I hope you didn't. Because it would be really goshdarn silly for someone who's been on Tumblr for years to suggest that the 2010s were not a fucking golden age of young LGBTQ+ people tentatively reaching out to explore their gender and sexuality, and being deluged with immense volumes of bullshit by other LGBTQ+ people for it.

I don't want to in any way discourage people from reaching out to LGBTQ+ groups, because it's very possible that the reward will far outweigh the risks. It's possible that other people will welcome you and will enforce a code of conduct against anyone who gives you shit. I'm not saying, "Hide forever! You're on your own, kid!"

But on the other hand, it is very easy, in a million different ways, to say "We didn't think very hard about making these groups feel welcome and protected in our space" without ever writing it into official policy.

#staranise original #lgbt discourse #transphobia tw #biphobia tw #aphobia tw

[irondad-defensesquad]

You get to exhale now

Also posted on AO3!

This was originally sillier, but it grew deeper. There's nothing too heavy about it, it ends well! However:

TRIGGER WARNING - discussions of acephobia and biphobia.

DO NOT SHIP PETER AND TONY. P/ROSHIP DNI.

--

Peter has been planning this in his head for quite a while. The right time comes when he aces his last test, and a cartoon light bulb pops above his head.

He’s holding the paper in his hands and wearing clothes colored for the occasion. His stomach reacts with anxiety, which is not necessarily dread. He’s more than sure that Tony will be fine with Peter not being straight. The teen just wonders if his mentor even knows what asexuality is.

Peter has only come out to Aunt May and Ned for now, and obviously, they’re both okay with it. Ned already knew about asexuality, but even if May didn’t, she didn’t see anything “unnatural” or “odd” about it. Peter sometimes finds his aunt reading articles about asexuality probably to learn more. Seeing this, he thought Tony could know, too. In fact, Peter told May and Ned that he wanted to tell Tony as well. They encouraged him, but they also reassured Peter that he doesn’t need to come out to him or anyone if he doesn’t feel safe. But Peter does feel safe around Tony. He can be himself when they spend time together.

Even then, his mind already catastrophizes everything, no matter how unrealistic it is. Peter doesn’t expect to be kicked out or anything, but the last thing he wants is for his identity to be dismissed. Peter also has this in mind considering how Tony is, well, a playboy. Or used to be. It’s strange knowing this while Peter is sex-repulsed. What is Tony going to think about that?

The trip upstate feels too long and too short at the same time. Peter is bouncing his legs, trying his hardest not to crush the test with his hand. And now that he’s finally here, the anxiety increases. Happy even asks him if he’s okay, when the driver usually stays silent. Peter just says he’s excited to see Tony, which is half true. Fortunately, Happy doesn’t question him anymore.

Peter finds Tony in the kitchen this time. He’s kind of relieved about that, because he doesn’t want to get in the way of Tony’s work.

“Hey, kid!” The man greets. He hums. “I like the palette you’re going for today.”

He really just notices everything. “Y-Yeah, hey, Mr. Stark,” Peter chuckles. He hates that his hands are trembling.

“What’s up?”

“Ah, um…”

Peter mostly stares down at his paper, the A+ facing him, telling him to go for it. Tony waits.

“I… aced my Spanish test.”

“Oh, that’s great, kid!” Tony sounds happy for him, even though he probably wonders why Peter is so nervous to give this kind of news. “We’re definitely gonna celebrate, your pick.”

“A-Awesome, thanks.”

Why can’t he just say it?

“Is… there anything else you wanna tell me, Pete?”

To Peter, it’s obvious. He’s wearing black, gray, white, and purple clothes. He has the black ring on his middle finger. He aced his test. He’s basically a walking pride flag, but of course, Tony might know anything and Peter is just looking too pathetic. He’s probably not real to him.

He gulps and opens his mouth.

“I’m… I-I’m asexual, okay?” Peter sounds defeated.

Maybe Tony doesn’t know the term either.

But his mentor gasps.

“Oooooh! That’s why I was recognizing the colors. And the black ring, too. Sorry I didn’t catch the hints at first, kid.”

Peter blinks, perplexed. “What? You- You actually know what asexuality is?”

“Yes, of course.”

Of course? “Seriously?”

“You think I live under a rock?” Tony teases, not sounding annoyed.

Whoa, okay. That’s so weird. Of all people, he never imagined Tony Stark to know what asexual is.

“And… you’re okay with… me being asexual?” Peter asks like he’s a toddler wanting approval.

Tony’s smirk fades. “Why wouldn’t I be?” His voice softens a lot.

There are a lot of reasons Peter could list, but he just shrugs. He already knew Tony would be okay, and considering Peter doesn’t have to pull the slide presentation he made, he should be happy, right? Why isn’t he, then?

Why does he feel stupid?

Tony sighs. “Alright, come here, kiddo.” He stretches out an arm, inviting Peter.

The boy complies, so Tony wraps an arm around him and he guides them both to the couch. The man still respects Peter’s space while letting him know it’s okay.

“First off, I’m glad you told me. I’m relieved that you feel safe around me to come out,” Tony smiles at him.

Peter is unable to return it. His eyes are watering.

“I-I’m sorry, Mr. Stark,” he apologizes. Why does he want to cry?

“For what?”

“I dunno, it’s just… I-I knew you would be fine with it, but… I didn’t think you’d know what asexuality is or if you’d think it’s real at all.” Peter sniffs. “A-And I should be happy that you know, but…”

He’s met with silence, the kind that gives him time, that allows him to cry.

“You know, Mr. Stark… being asexual can be so… lonely sometimes. All the other kids my age talk about sex. All the adults I know also tell us we’re gonna find the right person one day. I see it all the time in movies, series, everywhere I go. I never liked it. But since I’m just a kid, everyone tries to convince me I’m gonna change my mind one day. I don’t get the appeal, I don’t get why it matters. I never felt like this for anyone, and I wonder if there’s something wrong with me,” Peter admits. “And as if that isn’t alienating enough, I have these super powers that make me less of a human being. I’ve never been normal, but that feeling just gets worse. Sometimes I wish I could be a normal kid who likes sex and who doesn’t have mutant powers. Maybe things would be easier, then.”

A few quiet tears roll down his face. Peter doesn’t think he has ever opened up about this facet of his sexuality. He never even told May or Ned. He never knew how to verbalize these feelings of inadequacy.

Peter almost forgets Tony has been listening this entire time, when the latter breathes in, probably due to the weight of the former’s words. He might be close to crying, too.

“Look, Peter,” Tony starts, “I’m not asexual, but as you probably know, I’m bisexual. I only came out when I was older, otherwise my dad would disown me if he found out. But what I want to say is that, to some level, I understand what you mean. Everyone sees bisexuality as a ‘phase’ or ‘confusion’. In a way, it’s not ‘real’, either. Like, pick a side, you’re either gay or straight.” Tony exhales. “Again, our experiences are not the same. From what you told me, yeah, asexuality sounds invisible. I just hope you know that you’re not invisible to me. You’re real and there’s nothing wrong with you. Like you said, society can be alienating, so many of us have to hide to be safe. It’s heartbreaking.” He’s then rubbing Peter’s back. “You’re safe here, Peter. You’re not any less of a person for having powers or for being asexual.”

The boy suddenly feels lighter. Thus, he leans against Tony, who gladly wraps his arms around him.

“It’s so tiring having to justify your existence,” Peter vents.

Tony doesn’t answer, but he silently agrees.

“Thanks for listening, Mr. Stark.”

“Sure, kid. I like the hints you showed me. They were very creative.”

Peter chuckles. “Yeah.”

“I think purple fits you.”

“I might wear it more often.”

Tony spends a while rubbing Peter’s back, until he hums.

“Asexuals like cake, right?” He wonders.

Peter grins. “I love cake.”

“Alright. We can order one for you, any flavor you like. I would bake it, but I haven’t baked since… a while,” Tony clears his throat, probably not wanting to say “decades” or else Peter would just make fun of him. “I don’t wanna ruin it for you.”

“It’s okay. Thanks, Mr. Stark.”

“You deserve it, kiddo.”

Peter just chooses a regular chocolate cake. It takes a while to arrive, of course. Until then, Tony shows him the bisexual flag he bought a long time ago, as well as pictures of him attending pride events over the years.

“Hey, what if we went to the next pride as Iron Man and Spider-Man? That would be so cool, right?”

Tony’s smile grows bigger. “That would be great, kid.”

As they eat the cake together – mostly because Peter urges him to eat with him –, Peter thinks of several ideas for the next pride month. Tony listens all the way, still grinning and looking at him with admiration.

Indeed, Peter Parker is real. And Tony loves him.

#irondad #fics #my fics #acephobia tw #biphobia tw #bi and ace solidarity let's gooo

[queerbauten]

I love how half this website felt it necessary to cancel Kyle Gordon—a Jewish comedian—for a character (based on Gordon and his brother themselves) they considered ableist, which then escalated to a ridiculous rap sheet that culminated in accusations of antisemitism...

... but when this site's multimillionaire faves actively throw their weight behind an apartheid state (in addition to a long list of things like broader racism, transmisogyny, biphobia, and abuse apologia), suddenly, it's complicated. it's nuanced. it's... whatever you need to sleep at night.

#Kyle Gordon #a Top 25 Tumblr moment is people only caring about anti-Slavic sentiment because they could use it as callout fodder #antisemitism #(because what else is it when you accuse a Jewish person of being *antisemitic* just because you were offended by him?) #and as I've said before (I think): I love that no one making the callouts even considered that Kyle might be ND himself #I don't know if he is—and quite frankly neither do you probably #so to recap: Jewish comedian makes what at best could be considered accidentally ableist content? bad. deserving of hate. #multimillionaire creator (of any religion or ethnicity) supports a state enacting genocide? they're just innocent guys 🥺 #Israel #Palestine #genocide tw #murder tw #death tw #violence tw #war tw #racism tw #transmisogyny tw #transphobia tw #biphobia tw #abuse tw #text heavy #long tags

[twilleansparks]

This lovely little gem that I got in my instagram comments:

#fandoms were a mistake lmao #tw: harrasment #harrassment #biphobia tw #tw biphobia #tw harrassment #lunter #though part of me is proud i got a hate comment lol #like hell yeah im a real huntceda fanartist >:3 #not art #twillean talks