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solarmorrigan · 5 months

Note

For the angst prompt thing: Steddie and "Don't fucking touch me."

Hello! Thank you very much for sending a prompt, I'm sorry it took me so long to post, but I do think this one is my favorite out of all the fills I've done for this prompt list <3

[No warnings; Unnamed Freak (who apparently got a name in the most recent novel, but I didn't know that at the time) is named Oliver]

Angsty-ish Prompt List

“I’m gonna step outside for a minute,” Steve leans in to murmur in Eddie’s ear, even though the music isn’t that loud.

“Yeah, sounds good.” Eddie nods, and only just keeps himself from turning to catch Steve’s mouth in a kiss when he feels the brush of his lips against his ear; it’s not his fault he’s developed some kind of Pavlovian association between having Steve’s mouth anywhere near his skin and receiving kisses – but they do have company.

Said company is just Gareth, Jeff, and Oliver, but still. Eddie has some decorum.

Steve stands from the couch and the arm he’d had slung around Eddie’s shoulders slides away slowly, his hand brushing warm and heavy over the back of Eddie’s neck, thumb stroking once, familiarly, along the side of his throat before disappearing entirely as Steve moves towards the front door. He doesn’t do so great with groups of people in small spaces anymore; the noise gets to him, and the heat generated by so many bodies in close proximity tends to give him a headache, so he takes breaks now and then, just to give his brain a few minutes to unbend.

The door swings open on silent hinges (Steve had attacked it with a can of WD-40 and a look of determination earlier today, insisting he couldn’t stand the squeaking anymore; he’s always doing things like that around the house – little repairs, organizing, picking things up, even though Eddie insists he doesn’t have to. He says he wants to, the endearing little weirdo) and Steve steps out into the cool evening, leaving Eddie and the boys behind in the warm light of the trailer’s main room.

“So,” Jeff says, looking up from his spot on the floor and gesturing vaguely at Eddie with his beer can, “how’s that going for you guys?”

Eddie blinks at him. “How’s what going?”

“The whole thing between you two,” Jeff clarifies, and Eddie raises a skeptical brow at him.

“You wanna talk about me and Steve having sex?” Eddie asks.

Jeff’s nose scrunches in distaste. “What? No.”

“Not ever,” Gareth jumps in.

“I mean…” Oliver says with a shrug, flinching when Gareth pelts him with a balled-up napkin.

“No,” Gareth reiterates.

“I refuse to apologize for simple curiosity,” Oliver sniffs, and Eddie, seated next to him on the couch, gives him a shove.

He’s glad his friends are accepting – supportive, even (he’d like to say he wouldn’t hang out with them if they weren’t, but let’s be real: nerds could be hard to come by in their neck of the woods, and as long as they were the quiet type of homophobic, Eddie would probably still play D&D with them. But he’s glad they’re not), but he does have some boundaries.

Like, one or two, maybe.

“I just meant the whole… dating thing,” Jeff says, taking a sip from his beer. “Because I’ll be honest, I really didn’t see it at first, but it actually seems to be working out.”

“Dating?” Eddie parrots blankly.

“Yeah. You guys are in, like, some kind of never-ending honeymoon phase or some shit,” Gareth says. “Hasn’t it been over two months?”

“Uhhh, no, I think you gentlemen are confused,” Eddie drawls. “Steve and I are not dating.”

This declaration is met with a moment of silence.

“Seriously?” Oliver finally says.

“Yep,” Eddie replies easily. “No relationship shit here. Strictly a friends-with-benefits-type deal.”

“Seriously,” Olver says again, flatly this time.

“Yes, Oliver, seriously,” Eddie huffs, reaching over to give him another shove, only to have his hand pushed away.

“Eddie, he was practically sitting in your lap just now,” Jeff says. “You two are all over each other.”

“Constantly,” Gareth adds.

Eddie shrugs. “It’s not like this is a big couch; we gotta squish. Anyway, Steve’s just a touchy kind of guy.”

“He doesn’t sit like that with any of us,” Gareth points out.

“Yeah, well, you guys aren’t the ones receiving benefits,” Eddie says. “You want him to sit on your lap? You could ask.”

Gareth lets his head hang back with a noise of frustration. “That’s not the point, and you know it.”

“Don’t you two go on dates?” Jeff asks. “I’ve seen you at the movies. You talk about going out to eat, doing other shit…”

“Yeah, see, that’s the friends part of friends with benefits,” Eddie snarks. “Friends hang out sometimes, I’ve been told. We are all, in fact, hanging out right now, but that doesn’t mean I’m dating any of you.”

“You don’t see the way he looks at you?” Oliver asks, and Eddie can’t help but scoff.

He appreciates the fact that Oliver is passionate about pretty much anything he does, but it also means he’s given to romanticizing. He doesn’t usually manage to drag Jeff or Gareth in with him, though.

“Pretty sure he looks at me like a friend, because that’s what we are.” Eddie rolls his eyes before offering a smarmy little grin. “I mean, I’m sure he looks at me as an exceptionally attractive friend, but that’s it.”

“Genuinely can’t tell if you’re fucking with us, man,” Jeff says, rolling his eyes.

“Genuinely, I am not,” Eddie promises, taking the last viable swallow from his beer before getting up and heading for the kitchen, wiggling his empty can at the others with a raised eyebrow in question. Gareth raises his own near-empty can with a shrug and Eddie nods. “Look,” he says as he ducks towards the fridge, “Steve isn’t the kinda guy you have a relationship with, anyway, you know?”

Eddie doesn’t mean this in a negative way, just as a matter of fact. Steve just doesn’t seem to be a relationship kind of guy. Nancy had been something of an outlier, in how long she and Steve had lasted, and it had become clear after the dust from the Upside Down had settled that he really doesn’t have any interest in pursuing her further. Just the other day, he’d mentioned to Eddie how difficult relationships can be, and about how glad he is they have their thing together instead.

“Being with you is just… easy,” Steve had said; he hadn’t been looking at Eddie at the time, his face instead pillowed on Eddie’s chest, hair sticking to his naked skin where the sweat was still cooling from their last round, but Eddie could see the edge of a smile on his lips.

And Eddie doesn’t have much experience with relationships himself, but he knows that being friends with Steve is easy and that the sex feels equally easy and that the way he’d agreed with Steve and carded his fingers through his hair had sent Steve right to sleep with that same smile still in place.

Easy.

Now, Eddie shoves his head into the fridge and reaches for the beers that have somehow gotten pushed to the back. “It’s nothing major, okay?” he calls back towards the living room.

“Eddie…” Gareth calls back, an edge to his voice.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m on it.” Eddie waves vaguely, making sure to grab a second beer. “Anyway, Steve’s a good friend, and he’s really hot, and we’re just having fun.”

The bang of the front door against the frame startles Eddie so badly he nearly smacks his head on the underside of the freezer as he stands, a beer clutched in each hand like he might be able to use them as projectiles.

There is no threat, though – just Steve, who had apparently failed to catch the screen door before it had shut too quickly behind him. He doesn’t seem to have noticed; he’s just standing there, staring at Eddie, color rising high in his cheeks, eyes wide and shocked, like he’s just been slapped.

Concern wells up from Eddie’s gut, and he opens to his mouth to ask what’s wrong when Steve finally speaks.

“Yeah,” he croaks, “I’m not having fun.”

Eddie’s brows furrow in confusion, the beginnings of cold dread trickling into his veins well ahead of any conscious thought.

“I think I– I think I should go,” Steve says.

He grabs his keys from the side table by the door, where they’ve lived next to Eddie’s and Wayne’s for the last few months whenever he’s been at the house, and then he’s gone again, the screen door banging shut once more behind him.

And Eddie has no idea what just happened, but he knows it wasn’t good. He drops the beers on the counter and bolts out the door after Steve.

Steve is nearly to his car by the time Eddie scrambles down the front steps, and he’s paying absolutely no attention when Eddie calls after him.

“Steve,” Eddie tries again, stumbling to a stop right behind him as he jams his keys into the driver’s side lock. “Steve, for fuck’s sake, what–” he reaches out, wrapping one hand around Steve’s bicep, and Steve jerks out of his grip.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” Steve snaps.

Eddie pulls his hand back, but doesn’t step away, entirely baffled by the sudden turn the evening has taken. “What the hell happened back there?”

Steve goes still, grip going lax on his keys. “I heard what you said, Eddie.”

“About – about what? Are you mad I was talking to them about us sleeping together? Because, Steve, they already knew,” Eddie insists, a little incredulous. “You said you were fine with them knowing! You were practically feeling me up in front of them!”

“I don’t give a shit if they know we’re having sex!” Steve hisses, finally whirling around to look at Eddie. “I meant the rest. About how I’m not the kind of guy you have a relationship with.”

Eddie’s stomach sinks. He hadn’t realized that was such a sensitive subject. “I – shit, I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings, I just didn’t think you wanted–”

“About how we’re just having fun,” Steve cuts in, and if he’d sounded raw before, his voice is practically ground down to nothing now.

That brings Eddie up short. “…aren’t we?” he asks after a moment.

Steve says nothing.

“I mean, shit, Steve, it’s not like we’re in a relationship,” Eddie says, offering a little laugh, because even Steve would have to admit that the idea is a little silly.

Except.

Except Steve just glances away, staring at the ground beside Eddie’s feet, and – oh, shit.

“Oh, shit.”

Steve is still unnervingly silent, one arm curled around his middle while the other hand comes up to pinch briefly at the bridge of his nose. He still won’t look at Eddie.

“You… you thought we were,” Eddie says dumbly, and Steve shrugs.

“Can you blame me? We spend all our time together, Eddie. I’m here more than I’m at my own house, I think I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve slept in my own bed in the last month. We go out and do things together, I try to keep things nice around the house because I want Wayne to like me, we have, like, a lot of sex, and– we… I mean, we kiss and touch and just – do shit like that even when it doesn’t lead anywhere.” Steve shrugs helplessly, finally looking up. “I mean, Christ, Eddie, what did you think we were doing?”

“I thought we were friends!” Eddie insists. Steve throws him an incredulous look and Eddie amends, “With benefits!”

“Right.” Steve’s expression flattens back out, going cold and hard and unlike anything Eddie’s become used to from him. “Because I’m not the kind of guy you’d want to have a relationship with.”

“I said that because I thought you didn’t want to be in a relationship!” Eddie snaps. “It’s not like you stay with anyone for very long, so I just assumed you didn’t want to be with anyone.”

Some of the ice retreats from Steve’s face, leaving a watering kind of hurt in its stead. “Do you listen to me at all when I talk?”

“What? Of course I do!” Eddie might have gotten turned around in certain respects, but he will not have his merits as a friend called into question; of course he listens to Steve.

“Are you sure? Because I talk about you an awful lot. I talk about doing things with you, about doing things in the future with you,” Steve says pointedly, “about how I want to stay with you.”

And Eddie had wanted Steve to stay with him, too. He’s just been thinking – well, he’d thought it was because they get along so well, that Steve had wanted to stick around. That it had only made sense.

“We never talked about… being anything else,” Eddie says, the protest a little weak even to his own ears. “I’m pretty sure I’d remember that.”

Steve pulls a sharp breath in, pinching at the bridge of his nose again; he leaves his hand there this time, eyes scrunched shut. “Just a few days ago, I told you how much I liked being with you. How good and how easy it felt compared to anyone else I’ve ever been with,” he says, barely more than a rough whisper. “And you said…”

I like being with you, too.

Eddie had said that.

He’d meant that he likes being around Steve, likes being his friend, definitely likes having sex with him, but he’d said it while combing his fingers through Steve’s hair, while cuddled up with him in bed, and – okay, yes, he can see the mixed signals there. He can see where Steve might have gotten the idea that they didn’t have an arrangement, that they were just together.

“I– I didn’t mean–”

“Obviously,” Steve snaps, dropping his hand from his face and turning back towards his car.

Eddie tsks, frustrated, and reaches out to grab Steve’s wrist – not pulling, just trying to keep his attention.

“Don’t,” Steve warns him, pulling back from his grasp for a second time.

“I didn’t mean to lead you on,” Eddie tries desperately. “I really… I really didn’t.”

“Yeah. I can see that. But Eddie…” Steve is quiet for a moment, posture so tense and still that Eddie suspects he’s not even breathing. “I’m probably the best-qualified asshole around to tell you that you really have to fucking think about how what you’re doing affects the people around you.”

Somehow, that stings more than any screamed insult Steve could have thrown at him.

“Steve…”

“I’ll come get my shit out of your place tomorrow,” Steve says, low and sharp, before getting into his car and slamming the door behind him.

After that, Eddie has no choice but to step back or get run over, and he watches until Steve’s taillights are no longer visible.

He can hear the hissing of some whispered conversation just beyond the door as he trudges back up the front steps, but his friends fall conspicuously quiet the moment he steps inside.

“…hey,” Gareth finally ventures after several seconds of awkward, sticky silence.

“Hey,” Eddie says flatly.

“Do you… want us to stay?” Jeff asks.

Slowly, Eddie shakes his head. “I think I should… I need to– think about shit.”

The boys all nod, throwing him variously sympathetic glances and clapping him on the shoulder on their way out. Oliver pauses, as if he’s going to say something, but Gareth gives him a shove and gets him out the door before he has the chance. Probably for the best.

Eddie feels numb as he trudges back towards his room, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.

He flops down on his bed, face landing in a pillow that smells entirely too much like Steve’s shampoo. Probably because it’s on the side of the bed that Steve always takes. Next to the nightstand with the small stack of sports magazines that definitely aren’t Eddie’s. And the spare pair of glasses that also isn’t Eddie’s.

With a low tug in his gut, Eddie realizes how much of Steve’s stuff has crept into his room, into the trailer, into his life – how much Steve has become a part of his life, how much of Eddie’s day has been built around him, how much he’s come to lean on his presence, has come to want him there.

And Steve is going to take it all back sometime soon. Take all of his things away before he removes himself from Eddie’s life, too, because Eddie hadn’t been thinking and he hadn’t been careful and he hadn’t realized–

Eddie’s pretty sure he just broke up with Steve.

He’s also pretty sure he hadn’t wanted to.

His main consolation, as he curls up on his side, nose still buried in Steve’s pillow, is that as soon as Robin hears what happened (and she will hear, he has no doubt), she’ll probably come murder him.

At least he won’t have to wallow for long.

Part 2

#steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #stranger things #smallspaceplant #eddiesteve #listen Steve is u-haul lesbian flavored and Eddie is I know we're married but do you like me? lesbian flavored - you feel?#anyway I shouldn't be allowed to use tags on less than six hours of sleep!#answers from solar #solar wrote #hurt no comfort #edit: now with a continuation that will eventually include comfort

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ynbabe · 2 months

Text

We don’t hate each other ୨୧ Arthur x fem! reader

Y/n was Ollie's oldest friend, growing up with him as he raced his way up to formula one, somewhere in between she found Arthur Leclerc, found him a massive fucking pain in the ass that is until something changes when Ollie debuts in Carlos Sainz Ferrari.

A always, comments and requests are always welcome! lemme know what y'all think of this!

Warnings: curses, lime

y/nl/n

y/nl/n GET THIS MAN IN A FERRARI ASAP 💪 💪 💪 😮‍💨

Username they're relationship is so important to me actually

username arent they just friends?? username girl you believe that? LOOK AT THEM THEY'RE LITERALLY MARRIED username theyre 18 go touch grass pls 😭

username GET THAT MAN IN A FERRARI!!!

Username shes so real for that bow, ollies so cute 🥹

olliebearman thank you for the very serious pictures of me, a very serious, very profession man

y/nl/n "very serious, very professional man"🤓 shut up you literally cried in my arms when you got called olliebearman i'm telling my pr officer to block you username did what in whose arms now?? username oooh so hes in love love

arthurleclerc Way to go Ols!

y/nl/n gtfo my post arthurleclerc gtfo off my fyp y/nl/n block me bitch arthurleclerc too much effort, cry olliebearman guys you're in public 😭

username whats with Arthur and Y/N? 😅

Username they're competing for Ollies love Username bro you wrong for that 😂

arthurleclerc

arthurleclerc to MY bestfriend, congratulations on making it to Ferrari and f1! You deserve the best! Hope my brother treated you well.

username SHOTS!! HAVE!! BEEN!! FIRED!!

Username he know he wrong for that first photo

Username okay wait. How do both Leclerc have a Wattpad ass gay romance is it genetic??

Username bro all capped the my 😭

username mans petty as hell

username @/y/nl/n me personally, I wouldn't take that

username hes stealing your man girl go get him!!

oliiebearman Thank you Arthur! Yes he did!

arthurleclerc ur welcome ols ❤️ username @/y/nl/n were waiting for you boo username its the red heart for me Username Charles come get your brother!!! he's cosplaying you and max on main again

y/nl/n Congrats Ollie!! love you 🥰 (Not gonna make this abt myself like some other girls)

arthurleclerc revoking ur paddock pass btw 🥰 Olliebearman ... I'm blocking you both 🥰

username mans done with them 😂

You rolled your eyes as you saw Arthur's comment on yours, how could he be so childish. Forget it, you reminded yourself, today is for Ollie and Ollie only.

You waited in Ollie's driver room till he was done with the debrief, you'd go out to celebrate with him and his family later. His trainer had given him a pass on the diet, after all, scoring points in F1 was no joke.

You jumped off the chair you were lounging in, ready to hug the man as you heard the door open but to your disappointment, it was only Arthur.

You groaned as you saw the boy and he scowled in return. You never knew how your rivalry began. One moment you were visiting Ollie for the first time at Prema and the next you were in a screaming match with a Monagasuque man with the cutest accent.

"What are you doing?" He asked, rather, demanded.

"Waiting for my friend," you replied with the same annoyance in your voice, "What are you doing here?" you accused, stepping towards him.

He pulled a face, closing the gap, "Here to support my friend, you know cause we can actually stand each other,"

"Hah, sure, at least I'm not jealous of my friends, you know cause they actually make it into f1," you shrugged, knowing it was a low blow.

His face morphed into anger as he pushed closer towards you, "You need to shut up," he spoke in a low voice, you'd be scared of the taller, much stronger boy if you weren't doused in anger yourself.

"Make me then," why did you say that- Oh shit.

Your eyes widened as he kissed you, making both of you stumble back and fall on Ollie's driver room bed. You groaned as your back hit the mattress, the older boy breaking the kiss, looking down at you in concern.

"O-oh, my god! Y/n I'm so sorry, I don't know wh-" he began rambling but you couldn't let him win, could you? So you kissed him back, letting your hands run through his hair.

He led one hand to your waist, letting it fall under your shirt, he hissed at the warmth your skin radiated under his palms.

"Oh my god, OH MY GOD," Someone yelled, making Arthur push off the bed, and fall on the floor.

"Ollie this isn't what it looks like," he explained from the floor making you frown.

"It isn't?" you asked making him turn to you.

"No, it is," he explained to you, then turned to shocked Ollie in the doorway, "I mean- it is," he tried to explain.

Ollie paused for a moment, "On my bed, really?" he replied, disgust in his voice.

You picked up the pillow on his now messed up bed, throwing it at his head, "Shut up,"

He laughed as he ducked, "Hey, at least none of us had to intervene," he confessed making you and the boy who was now getting up off the floor groan in defeat.

olliebearman

olliebearman never make out in my room again, I beg you

Y/nl/n sorry I stole your boyfriend, Ols

arthurleclerc you are still the love of my life, y/n's just a friend olliebearman DO NOT START THIS AGAIN

Username HUH?

username chat is this real rn? username fr thought they hated each other username bro said he was going to get his Wattpad enemies to lovers one way or the other

username Charles Leclerc it's your turn now.

charlesleclerc So all the ranting actually led to something?

y/nl/n he talks about me?? arthurleclerc NO I DIDN'T! Charles shut up or I'll tag someone you rant about. Charleslecler y/n changed you i dont like this relationship anymore username WHAT DO YOU MEAN??? Username First we get Arthur x y/n and now we are getting Charles read like filth 😭

trying something new, thoughts?

#f1 #formula 1 #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #arthur leclerc #arthur leclerc x reader #ollie bearman #ollie bearman x reader #charles leclerc #arthur leclerc imagine #f1 smau #f1 social media au

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aragornsrockcollection · 2 years

Text

Hello I’m here to talk about an opinion that isn’t so much unpopular because people don’t like it, but because it is splitting hairs and basically an argument based in semantics that sane people reasonably do not waste their time caring about it.

I am neither sane nor reasonable and therefore think about this a lot, and get ready to pull out a soapbox and type the Text Wall of China any time I hear people offhandedly contradict this opinion, and so I have come here today to die on this molehill, and write the over-long post of my dreams, because fuck it, it’s my blog.

Drumroll please:

Sauron is not The Lord of the Rings

The Lord of the Rings is the main antagonist though, so furthermore,

Sauron is not the main antagonist of The Lord of the Rings

I internally go insane every time someone says “Sauron, the eponymous Lord of the Rings” or “The antagonist never actually appears in Lord of the Rings” or uses Lord of the Rings as an penultimate example of having a flat ‘evil for evil’s sake’ villain. This is mostly in YouTube videos so I’m not calling out anyone here.

So who is the Lord of the Rings? Where do I get this shit? Why should anyone care?

I will tell you in far too much detail under this cut, because I told you I was gonna be extra about it and this is already long enough to inflict on my followers without their consent.

First and foremost, Frodo is not the Lord of the Rings either. Let’s get that out of the way. Gandalf explicitly tells us that in Many Meetings (the first chapter in Rivendell in Fellowship), when Pippin greets a newly awakened Frodo with quintessential Fool of a Took™️ swagger.

‘Hurray!’ cried Pippin, springing up. ‘Here is our noble cousin! Make way for Frodo, Lord of the Ring!’

‘Hush!’ Said Gandalf from the shadows at the back of the porch. ‘Evil things do not come into this valley; but all the same we should not name them. The Lord of the Ring is not Frodo, but the master of the Dark Tower of Mordor, whose power is again stretching out over the world! We are sitting in a fortress. Outside it is getting dark.’

So that’s my theory busted right off the bat! Gandalf straight up tells us the Lord of the Ring is Sauron (‘the master of the Dark Tower of Mordor’ which is Sauron).

But I already told you, this is a hair-splitting semantics-based theory! He said Sauron was the Lord of the Ring. Not the Lord of the RingS. Yes, this whole theory revolves around a single letter difference between the title of the series and Gandalf’s statement, WHAT OF IT?

But in all seriousness. Tolkien was a linguist. There was no way this choice was not deliberate, not on something so important to the narrative. And there is a very important difference between what he is referring to when he uses ‘The Ring” singular, and “The Rings” plural. The Ring that Frodo carried to Mordor has it’s singular nature highly emphasized by the language that surrounds it. THE definite article Ring, the ONE Ring. Just the One. Singular Singular Singular.

The Rings (plural) refers to the rings of power which Celebrimbor wrought, with Sauron’s help, but Sauron is objectively not the Lord of those rings. Not the three Elven ones at least, which he never touched and only suspects the location of. Without his One Ring he has no power over the Three, and a big problem with him regaining his Ring is that he would gain power over those rings, the ringbearers, and the safe realms that had been wrought with them, basically crippling those with the power to resist him.

Him NOT having the Ring, and therefore NOT having lordship over all the rings, is a pretty major plot point. Like, it’s not a reach to say Sauron not having the Ring is what drives the entire story. And he is NOT the Lord of the Rings without it.

And he never gains it, so is the whole series named after Sauron’s aspirations, that the main characters are trying to prevent? I mean, from an angle yes. But also no.

Because while Pippin and Gandalf’s exchange is the closest we come in the text to seeing the title, let me show you the only place within the covers that “The Lord of the Rings” is presented, at least in my beat up third hand 70’s edition. It may not be formatted like this in other editions, but I still think it says something about how we are supposed to read the title:

[Image ID: Masking tape can clearly be seen holding together my poor abused copy of Fellowship, open to the title page. THE LORD OF THE RINGS is written across the top of the page in all caps, directly below it is the Ring Poem, as if The Lord of the Rings is a the title not only of the series but of the poem. /.End ID]

The One Ring is the Lord of the Rings, not Sauron, who is the Lord of the Ring.

“What?” Say imaginary naysayers in my head, “How can a Ring be a Lord? And why does this matter, if Sauron is the Lord of the Ring, doesn’t that make him the Lord of the Rings by proxy? Why are you wasting your and my time making an argument about this?”

I’m glad you asked imaginary naysayer, let me speak to your first point. How can a ring be a Lord? Well, like any good first time speechwriter, I’ve turned to Miriam Webster, and asked it to define a word we already know, in this case ‘lord.’

[Image ID: Screenshot of the Miriam Webster definition of ‘lord.’ The ones that are relevant are 1: One having power and authority over others. 1a: A ruler by hereditary right or preeminence to whom service and obedience are due. And 1f: One that has achieved mastery or that exercises leadership or great power in some area /.End ID]

In the poem, it is the Ring that is spoken of as ruling, not Sauron. Sauron is actually listed in the same position as all the others who receive rings, “The Dark Lord on his Dark Throne” occupying the same place in the sentence structure as the “the Elven-kings under the sky” and “the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone” and “Mortal Men doomed to die.” It is the One Ring, not Sauron, who rules them all, fulfilling our first definition “A ruler by hereditary right or preeminence.” In this case it would be by right of preeminence, or superiority. The One Ring outclasses the other rings and thus dominates them, binding them to obedience and service. Gandalf calls it “the Master-Ring” when it is first revealed for what it is in Bag-End with the words appearing from the flame.

The Ring has it’s own will too. It’s repeatedly stated to be in control of Gollum when Gandalf is first telling us about it. I’m literally so spoiled for quotes about this that I was paralyzed with indecisiveness over what to use but let’s keep it simple with this one. It’s from Gandalf explaining why Gollum didn’t have the Ring allowing Bilbo to come upon it in the chapter “Shadows of the Past” from Fellowship:

‘It was not Gollum, Frodo, but the Ring itself that decided things. The Ring left him.’

So if Sauron is the Lord of the Ring, and the Ring is the Lord of the Rings, isn’t he Lord of the Rings by proxy? Yes, when he has the Ring. But also being the ruler of a lord doesn’t make the title of that lord your title, if that makes sense. People don’t call Aragorn the Prince of Ithilien, that’s Faramir’s title, Aragorn is King of the Reunited Kingdoms, he rules Ithilien, sure, but by proxy. Ithilien reports to Faramir who reports to Aragorn (I should be calling him Elessar since I’m talking about him as king, but whatever). If Aragorn lost the ability to contact Faramir or Ithilian, he would still theoretically be king there but he would have no practical control, just like Sauron with the Rings of Power.

Why does this matter? It mostly doesn’t. It does not change anything practically in the story at all.

But it matters to me, because it might help change perspective on the antagonist of LotR. It’s the Ring. Sauron is a force in the world, one the Ring is closely allied with, and from whom many of the obstacles come, but the entity that our protagonist is really fighting on every page is the Ring.

If Gandalf were the main character, or Aragorn, or almost anyone else on Middle Earth, Sauron would be the Primary Antagonist. But they are not. Frodo is the Primary Protagonist, and his struggle is NOT against Sauron, it is against the Ring.

If destroying the Ring had not destroyed Sauron, would Frodo have kept fighting in this war? NO! He had his task, and once it was done he was done, even if the world ended afterwards. Everything is driven by the Ring. The threat to the Shire comes from the presence of the Ring, so Frodo takes the Ring to Rivendell. The danger of the Ring is not neutralized by it being brought to Rivendell, so he continues his journey to destroy it once and for all. He doesn’t fight Sauron, he fights the Ring. He fights with himself to keep going in spite of the despair it levels on him, the poisonous words it whispers in his ear, the physical toll it takes on his body. He fights Boromir and Sam (not to the extent he does in the movie, but still a bit) and Gollum over the Ring. He negotiates with Faramir over the Ring.

And the Ring is SUCH a more interesting and nuanced villain to struggle with than Sauron. Sauron is representative of a force in the world. He controls events but never appears, because he acts as the source of all evil, it’s representation on earth (at least now Melkor is in the Void), but it is far more interesting to watch the effect he has on others than deal directly with a character that is so obviously in the wrong in every way. Making Sauron a physical character in LotR is like making the Devil a present character in basically any piece of media that deals with evil.

Evil at its purest isn’t that interesting, because it contains no conflict. Leaving Sauron as an offscreen player leaves us to see characters that are not pure evil struggle with that conflict.

The fascinating thing about the Ring is that it has no power outside of what you give it. But given enough time even the best people, like Frodo, will end up losing themselves to it, as it whispers in your ear with your own voice.

I want to go ballistic when people point to LotR and say it has a one dimensional villain. EVERYONE’S OWN VIOLENCE, DESPAIR AND THIRST FOR POWER IS THE VILLAIN OF LORD OF THE RINGS! Brought to the fore by a small unassuming golden trinket which just happens to also be the titular Lord of the Rings.

Honestly “The Ring is the Villain of LotR change my mind” should be its own big long post with lots of quotes and shit, the fact that the Ring is The Lord of the Rings just being a small point in it.

But unless you are a specific type of interested in story structure and stuff none of this is at all meaningful and it really, really doesn’t matter, so I’m gonna go.

Thanks for coming with me on this dumb journey.

#tolkien #jirt #lotr #lord of the rings #the one ring #Sauron #jrr tolkien #Frodo #story structure #long post… even for me!#hot take #Gandalf #look #I’m sorry ok #this is so inconsequential and I say this as someone who likes meta

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ceebit · 1 year

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3racha and falling asleep on them

note : fluff™️, So Much Sap, loverboys, cece living vicariously thru these words. it’s not delusion i promise. i swear pls

chan exhales slowly when your head falls on his shoulder. finally. between being too scared to guide you to his shoulder himself in fear of waking you up and praying to anyone that would listen to please not let you hit your head on the window—the powers that be finally listened to his pleas and eased his inner dilemma peacefully.

except, his heart chooses that moment to remind his entire body of your proximity, and he slowly feels himself grow hot. it’s fine, he thinks, and shifts minutely to look out of the window. as long as they’re comfortable.

gently, you shift to wrap your arm around his, snuggling closer to him, and his eyes widen almost comically. he silently wills his heart to please stop threatening to fall out of his chest, that you’ve cuddled before and it didn’t make him this nervous, so what was the issue?

maybe it’s the way the sun streams through the window to halo around your head just right. maybe it’s the peaceful expression you wear each time you’re near him. or maybe it’s just wishful thinking of what could be, if he ever spoke on his feelings.

you’ve been out for half an hour, and changbin’s legs are beginning to fall asleep.

whatever, though. you needed a well deserved break and if getting you away from your laptop meant making his lap your makeshift pillow for the moment, then so be it. it’s not like he had much to do today, anyway.

he brushes your hair away from your face and catches himself smiling at the way you nuzzle into his warmth like a cat. his smile drops, internally scoffing at the absurdity of the small moment, and lets his hand drop back to the couch immediately.

stop it, he chides himself. think happy thoughts. happy thoughts like getting to hold you, for once… maybe if, you’d let him. of you in his sweaters, warm from a toss in the dryer, with a smile reserved just for him and he finds himself realizing he wouldn’t mind—

you shift in his lap to burrow even closer and he freezes.

shit.

“and i told him not to order the smaller size because he’d outgrown it too soon. you know, he’d benefit a lot more if he’d listen to me—”

a gentle weight slumps against his back and jisung pauses. he can faintly hear the confused sound of minho’s voice asking why he’d stopped talking, but his main concern is you. and the fact that you’ve dozed off behind him.

he can feel the press of your cheek against his back, and for a singular (and stupid) moment, he contemplates holding his breath lest you grow uncomfortable. the last thing he wanted was for a frown to tug the corners of your lips down, and after whispering a hushed excuse to the older male, he quietly hangs up and turns to regard you with wide eyes.

who allowed you to be this cute? it should be illegal, he thinks as he slowly shifts you so that you’re curled up against his side. and as he settles back into the cushions, he resigns himself to not moving until you wake up. as long as you were comfortable, he’d sacrifice the feeling in his left arm any day.

back home ⟡ the archive ⟡ join my taglist ⟡ last post

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huevobuevo · 5 months

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ive fuckingggg HAD IT . i am going to talk about gegg qsmp because idk why but charlie slimecicle made one of the best representations of age regression ive seen in media and i am NOT joking.

so i dont rlly post alot about the qsmp on my blog, thus i wouldn't be surprised if this post goes unnoticed or ignored by a vast majority of my friends & followers. for those of you who ARE reading this with no prior experience with the QSMP lemme just quickly summarize some much needed background knowledge.

(Quackity Voice) The QSMP Is The Worlds First Multi-lingual Minecraft Server; it hosts a wide variety of twitch streamers who speak English, Spanish, Portuguese, and French. the beginning plotline of the server (which is where Gegg came into existence) follows the various players as they are grouped into pairs to care for a dragon egg. The main ones that will be talked about today are Tilin, Quackity's egg, and Juanaflippa, Slimecicle & ElMariana's egg. The eggs are, of course, played by anonymous admins, who have given these eggs their own unique personalitys despite only communicating through signs and emotes. The players have quickly imprinted on their respective eggs, as expected, and have gone on to view these eggs as their own children. The rules were simple - each egg had two lives and two lives ONLY. each day the eggs have tasks for the streamers to complete ON STREAM or else the egg could die of starvation & neglect (points at Trump, Maximus & DanTDM's egg).

i will be referring to Slimecicles character in the QSMP as Charlie or Slime for better coherency. from now on i will be referring to the characters, not the streamers.

Slimecicle and Mariana were not the best parents to Juanaflippa, but it was clear that they truly and deeply cared for their daughter. They supported her transition and, especially in Slimes case, did everything they could to make sure their daughter was safe. Juanaflippa had lost her second life due to an accident, which caused Slime to loose his shit and go on a murderous rampage to try and get the literal Minecraft Jesus Christ of Nazareth to come back and revive his daughter (she came back after a court case. long story.)

Basically Juanaflippa was loved, and she loved her parents back- but there was someone else she cared for the most in the whole wide world

Tilin, who Slime offered to take care of once her father had to log off game. There was another accident, and Tilin was caught in the crossfire between Charlie and a few mobs at night. She was on her second life, meaning that Charlie had officially ended his daughters best friend right infront of her eyes. Distraught and ashamed, Charlie ran off into self-isolation and left Juanaflippa in the care of Mariana and their friend Roier. During his "Eggxile" while he was trying to find a way to bring back Tilin, Charlie learnt that Mariana killed Juanaflippa AGAIN. Instead of going on another tirade Charlie just lost it.

He's now carrying the deaths of two children on his mind, isolating himself from what little friends he had on the main island. During his initial stay on the island there were only English and Spanish players, but when the French and Brazilian players arrived he still spent a majority of his time in isolation. Charlie wasn't apart of a good chunk of the main island lore for a long, long time, and pretty soon it began to feel like he was completely, and utterly, alone. He attended a wedding and a few parties, but it was visible how outcasted he was from all the new events and connections. He had regular breakdowns and pretty soon began to believe that Juanaflippa wasn't dead, she was just... somewhere else. He was gonna get her back. He did it once, he'll do it again. Fuck, he couldn't even bring himself to attend her own funeral, and even when he was allowed one final goodbye with his dead daughter Charlie still refused to accept the fact that Juanaflippa was never gonna come back home. He built a campfire on the beach of his Eggxile house with three chairs- one for him, one for his wife (who hadn't logged on in months), and one for Flippa.

TL;DR q!slime is going the fuck through it.

Later on Quackity decided to get Charlie in on a plan to try and steal from other peoples houses. They both lost their families, so it seemed only fair to Quackity that they ruin other people's lives as well. Basically Charlie had to pretend to be Quackity's NEW egg so that he can get close with the other eggs and fuck shit up.

Charlie liked it. Charlie... REALLY liked it, actually. His egg name was Gegg, and without knowing it he began to age regress.

Im calling Gegg a form of Age Regression because not only is Charlie mentally AND physically becoming a child, but through Gegg Charlie is allowed the freedom to escape his grief and explore what it means to be a "child" who was loved unconditionally. On the last Gegg stream Slime referred to the little goopy guy as something that lives inside of him. Gegg takes over him and he just looses himself in the act. He's not just playing a character called Gegg, he IS Gegg.

In the very first stream as Gegg he expressed his desire to learn what having a family was like- a common reason most people have for regressing. When "regressed" to this state Charlie/Gegg is constantly acting as a young child and actually enjoys it! He LOVED being Gegg! Even if it got too far in the end, Gegg was allowed to be open about his wants & emotions. Charlie was pushed back into the lives of the other players and fully reconnected with several people again for the first time since his self-imposed isolation. He gained new friends, too, once Gegg was introduced to the Brazilian and French players.

In turn the players never made any effort to expose Charlie's regression. while at the beginning there was some distrust & confusion over Charlie's sudden egg act it never went farther then a few subtle jokes at Geggs "true" identity (commenting on his backflips, which is something Charlie was known for). Aside from Wilbur, everybody treated Gegg as any other egg-child. He was cared for, his tasks would be completed on occasion, and the French+Brazilian players ESPECIALLY loved him! They supported Charlie's regression since at this point they began to realize how much shit he has been through since the deaths of Tilin and Flippa. Not only that, but the eggs as well played along with Gegg's coping mechanism; Leonarda (FoolishGamers + Vegetta777's egg) was one of the first to try and adopt Gegg as their own baby, while Chayanne (Philza+MissaSinfonia's egg) & Tallulah (Wilbur Soot's egg) acted as his "Geggsiblings" (even though Tallulah sorta got a bit rude to him during their second encounter, im guessing due to a new admin who wasn't around during Tallulah & Gegg's first interaction),

Infact, one of the best scenes of the Gegg Arc was during an interaction between Gegg & Bobby. Bobby was Roier & JaidenAnimation's egg, and he was also close to Juanaflippa & Tilin. The two kids talked through signs, where Bobby confessed that he held a grudge against Slime for what he did. Gegg said that he had every right to be upset, the poor boy had lost two of his closest friends after all. But then Bobby did something that shocked Charlie- he forgave him. he told Gegg to tell that "green guy" that he shouldn't be hard on himself anymore, both of them needed to move on already. Not only was Bobby a child, but he was one of the main eggs Quackity wanted Gegg to kill off first. Bobby was the reason why Gegg existed, the reason why Charlie was given the chance to heal from his trauma, and now he is telling Charlie to his face that its ok to forgive himself for the deaths of Tilin and Flippa.

Bobby knows who Gegg is, everybody does, which is why they treat Gegg with the same amount of love that every other egg gets.

Age Regression has frequently been misunderstood, and very rarely does it get the proper representation that it deserves. It is a very "taboo" form of coping, which is unfortunate due to how common it actually is. Most people feel uncomfortable with the image of grown adults acting as toddlers in diapers, and lump it together with the whole Age Play/DDLG ordeal- yet they fail to take into account what age regressors are ACTUALLY like. while it is something that just about anyone can do, the type of regression I will be talking about stems from people who seek refuge from traumatic events usually in their childhood. It can be voluntary or involuntary, and is a way for people to explore & reevaluate what it means to be a child. it is just that- a trauma response, one that im sure many of you participate in but are too scared to discuss it due to the stigma around it. Children who have experienced abuse regress, Teenagers who struggle with mental health regress, Adults with severe PTSD regress, and yet it is such a misunderstood part of the healing process that is practically unaccounted for in media. There is little to nothing on age regression representation that delivers it in a respectful, honest manner, due to this stigma, which only serves to push it further into the shadows of mental health discourse.

So to see age regression be used on a fucking minecraft server of all places in such a healthy light is so refreshing to see. While ironic at first, Charlie showcased age regression as something that shouldn't be shunned. It actively aided him through a dark period in his life and showed that he deserves a second chance. After Gegg canonically "died" Charlie returned to the island for his birthday and was finally ready to move on from Flippa & Tilins death (and then, yakno, the whole Codeflippa Arc happened)

TL;DR #2 Charlie Slimecicle's Character In The QSMP Age Regresses As A Way To Cope From The Deaths Of Two Eggs & Oh My God It Was Actually Really Fucking Emotional

#thanks for reading again hoooly fuck #slimecicle #q!slimecicle #charlie slimecicle #q!charlie #qsmp #gegg #qsmp gegg #gegg qsmp #qsmp slimecicle #qsmp charlie slimecicle #there will be a cold day in hell if i dont properly tag my fucking posts

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socialist-microwave-laser · 6 months

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the main thing that "leftist" goyim need to understand is that there isn't one definition of the word "zionism." "zionist" is not an insult, and it does not beget genocide or colonialism, because zionism for jews has many different meanings, each with their own interpretations of the state of israel and action points regarding palestine, with only a tiny portion of those advocating for any sort of violence against palestinians. if i had to boil everything down to brass tacks, i'd say zionism is the feeling that jews have a connection with eretz israel.* but there's so much that falls under that umbrella. there's christian zionism (which jewitches just did a wonderful episode discussing it and its genocidal roots with a very good bibliography [link here]), there's theodore herzl's definition that's like "yes i love colonialism let's do that!!!" (but also he was also toying with the idea of all the jews moving to argentina?). there's some (very few of whom are jewish) zionists who are uncritical of the israeli govt, there are some that want to see it dismantled immediately, and obviously there are many that lie somewhere in between the two. there are some jewish zionists who see medinas israel* as a miracle, and there are others who see it as blasphemy (either because of the belief that am israel* should not return from diaspora until the arrival of the moshiach (messiah), or because medinas israel has been doing a lot of monstrous, heinous, honestly un-jewish shit supposedly in the name of jews and judaism)

it is impossible to quickly sum up the wide scope of zionisms that exist today within judaism, not to mention those outside of it. however, it is important to note that for many jews, zionism is a word that merely describes longing, or even a longing for the ability to long. to quote my rabbi: "for me, zionism means i wish eretz israel was a place i longed to live." (the reasons why it isn't are the same reasons why any one of us critiques medinas israel—it is a horrid state doing horrifying, unspeakable things. to my rabbi and to many others, zionism means the eradication of medinas israel as it exists.)

there is currently a problem of people talking past each other, where some say anti-zionism is antisemitism and others say all zionists have blood on their hands. many of those in the camp of the former are often so broad in their definition of anti-zionism that that phrase is rendered nothing but unhelpful (at best), and many of those in the camp of the latter have such a narrow understanding of what zionism is that it completely turns off anybody who does have a more complete understanding of that word

this post is not intended to even scratch the surface of describing the meanings of all the different zionist movements and beliefs that haven't coalesced into any movement on any wikipedia page. rather, this post is to show non-jews who identify as leftists that are still open to learning about jewish experiences that zionism is not what the snappy, tens of thousands of note posts will lead you to believe. to those who say "death to zionists" please know that jews will not trust you, because you're calling for the deaths of a lot more jews than you think

eretz israel = the land of israel

medinas/medinat israel = the state of israel

am israel = the people of israel (jews)

these are all terms that are frequently used in jewish spaces and liturgy, especially the first and third. i have made the personal decision to use them in my daily conversations, because in liturgy that i interact with daily, "israel" means the third one, and i am very conscious to delineate the three, and especially to draw a distinction between the state of israel, the land that is so central to jewish liturgy, and the jewish people

#i made important text colorful bc i know big blocks of text can be hard for some people #also for the last time there are more zionist christians in the united states than there are jews on this planet #christians are using jews and muslims as pawns in their little game to summon the second coming of jesus #result in the complete eradication of all jews and muslims. we are their cannon fodder #and jews who have decided to side with them need to stop voting for the fucking leopards eating peoples' faces party #medinas israel #jumblr #zionism #anarchist #anti zionism #palestine #christian zionism #jewish zionism #jewish diaspora #tsiyyonus definition

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yawneneteyam · 1 year

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gorgeous (5) — sunset and vine.

— GORGEOUS, an avatar smau ( by yawneneteyam )

— gorgeous, sunset and vine !

"I hate that you don't look bad" y/n sighed as she opened the door to the main entrance. she didn't wait for a response before trudging back towards the staircase. neteyam chuckled before following her.

"if it means anything, I think you look great," he took in her messy hair and flushed face.

"yeah the dressing gown is a really good look," y/n rolled her eyes. it was a pale blue with small white flowers over it. neteyam envied how soft it looked.

y/n's dorm room was one of the closest to the stairs, so she was happy that she didn't have to walk anymore- neteyam was too. neteyam coughed into his fist as y/n opened her front door.

"this is it," it was small, cozy, "nothing special," she sniffed.

"it's nice!" neteyam shrugged his backpack off his right shoulder putting it by the door.

eventually, they both got on y/n's bed and got out their laptops and books. they were both slow to start on their work, too eager to speak with each other. it was approaching the late afternoon when they called for a break.

"have you taken any medicine today?" neteyam asked, clearing his throat. y/n noticed that he was frequently checking in on her, even though he sounded worse than her. neteyam was too caring and prideful for his own good.

"yeah, this morning" y/n nodded, stretching her arms above her head. He watched as the candle sitting on her window sill flickered and hit her skin just right in the darkness. the sun was beginning to go down. "I should probably take some more," y/n sniffed, getting up from her spot in bed.

"I can put a movie on or something if you want?" she pulled out a packet of cold and flu tablets. "Or a tv show?" neteyam knew he could stay for much longer, his mom and dad would expect him home for dinner- but he couldn't say no to her.

"yeah," He nodded, "yeah, we can do that"

neteyam was slow to lay himself down on her bed, but when y/n giggled at his apprehensiveness, he laid down quickly with a roll of his eyes. she offered him some medicine, he declined saying he would be fine. y/n knew he was being stubborn and prideful. so she slipped her spare packet into his backpack with a sticky note attached to it.

you're too stubborn, take care of yourself! was scrawled onto the post-it, with her snapchat handle written on there too. she crawled back onto her bed, with neteyam holding his laptop, some streaming service on the screen.

they decided on a movie. quiet chatter between them as the movie played. the sun how now set and neteyam had fallen asleep. y/n closed the lid of his laptop with a smile. she put all of his books back into his bag with the rest of his things. she could hear his chest rattle as he breathed, with a shake of her head she wished he would watch after himself better.

— gorgeous, sunset and vine !

y/n let neteyam sleep for a little while before waking him up. "nete, you've gotta get up- it's getting late," she whispered. neteyam began to slowly stir, a few coughs breaking away from his mouth. he was quick to cover his mouth, realising how close she was to him- mumbling a quick and embarrassed apology.

"what time is it?" he asked, his voice hoarse.

"around seven?" she wasn't entirely sure to be honest.

"shit," he rubbed his eyes, "I better get home before my mom starts to worry,"

"I'll walk you downstairs,"

"yeah just let me pack up my-" he paused, realising his stuff had already been put away for him, "thanks y/n,"

"it's okay," she shrugged, trying her best to not shyly avert her gaze to the ground. y/n took off her dressing gown to walk neteyam downstairs, knowing most of the girls would be downstairs for dinner.

"thank you for coming Neteyam," y/n noticed a few girls eyeing neteyam from behind her.

"always, I'll send you my half of what I did," he smiled.

"yeah cool, whenever you can"

"still good to sit with each other on Tuesday?" he covered his mouth as he coughed again. y/n winced, hearing the crackle of his chest.

"yeah if you haven't died," she playfully nudged him, "go home and rest,"

"I was but some girl made me come to her dorm," he smirked.

"oh whatever," she rolled her eyes, opening the door for him. "get out then," y/n chuckled, lighting pushing him outside.

"I will," he smiled, "night y/n, go to sleep early,"

"take your own advice for once yeah?" she crossed her arms. he watched her as she leant against the doorframe, her hair was sitting perfectly- he wished that she could see how beautiful she looked.

"yeah, sure" he nod

— gorgeous, sunset and vine ! I seriously couldn't help and not make Jamie towa'an its just so funny to me???????? I am actually hilarious. okay here's the fifth part, more progression between y/n and Neteyam <3 also the little speech bubble without an arrow shape was y/n thoughts!!!!! let me know what you want to see in these, etc. all the love!!!

#•°. * gorgeous smau #neteyam x reader #neteyam sully #neteyam x y/n #neteyam headcanons #netyam smut #*࿐ neteyam #avatar x reader #avatar #avatar 2 #avatar the way of water #avatar 2022 #avatar fanfiction

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daddy-dins-girl · 1 month

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Playdate - Chapter Eight

IMPORTANT NOTE: I'm posting both chapters 7 and 8 today so just make sure you didn't actually miss 7 or this one might not make much sense, lol. Also I'd recommend having chapter 7 fresh in your mind when you read this one. This chapter serves as an 'interlude' chapter that occurs before/during/after Chapter 7 but is told from Dave and Marcus' POV's (not Reader's). One final note, a page break/divider indicates a shift of POV to another character, but hopefully that comes across easily enough in the writing anyway.

Main Masterlist Series Masterlist

AO3 link

pairing: Marcus Pike x f! Reader x Dave York

Word Count: 5.1k

Notes: Who gave me the right to put all this ANGST in my PORN story? dw, I have a couple more chapters planned out, I'll fix this mess I've created eventually :P

Chapter Warnings (BIG TIME spoilers in the warnings... I'd recommend skipping them if you don't want to be spoiled. If you're at this point in this story, you're fine with whatever I have left to throw at you lol): 18+ MDNI. M/M (Yeah that's right. Reader who? Sorry babe, I'll make it up to you next time!). Oral sex. Hand jobs. Anal play. A shower stall is our 3rd main character in this chapter. Inexperienced!Marcus. Dom!Dave. Daddy Kink. Derogatory talk. Praise kink. Little sprinkling of Soft!Dave. Porn with too many feelings that these idiot men don't know what to do with (we'll work on them, ok?). Infidelity-ish (again, these three got some shit to work out).

MASSIVE thank you for @janaispunk for beta'ing and being my sounding board.

Page dividers by the generous and talented @saradika-graphics

When restfulness fails to come for Dave he eventually decides to pull himself away from the two sleeping forms next to him in the bed and head off to the shower instead. He could use a thorough washing, and not to mention the relaxing spray and solace of the shower may just offer him a bit of a chance to clear his head, hopefully.

Letting out a heavy sigh once he reaches the bathroom near the front entryway of the suite he shrugs off the oversized fluffy hotel robe and hangs it on the back of the door before closing it shut, reaching inside the shower stall and turning the temperature up to near scalding. He hisses the moment he steps inside the large enclosure, immediately turning his back to the water and facing the door instead but within a few seconds the temperature starts to feel perfect and he rolls his shoulders and aching muscles under the steady beat of the massaging spray.

“Fuck” he groans, head tilting back to let the water wash over his face and through his hair. In hindsight he maybe should’ve had a cold shower because he’s been rocking a semi for the last… god knows… since not long after his two bedmates had fallen asleep. He resists the urge to wrap his fist around himself and take care of it solo, thinking he can will it away with sheer mental focus instead. As if he could focus on much of anything right now. His mind was scrambled, and that just wasn’t Dave. He had an innate ability to compartmentalize, always had. It’s what made him so good at his job and had gotten him through many obstacles in his life thus far. But then he met fucking Marcus Pike, which ultimately, also led him to you, and now here he was playing fucking house with what was meant to be a one or two time fun “hookup” and goddamit if he didn’t feel himself starting to fall. What’s worse is that he hadn’t just fallen for you, either. Annoyed with himself yet again for not being able to shut his brain off, Dave turns around to face the spray again and gets to the task of washing his hair instead, needing something else to focus on besides the insistent need that’s hanging between his legs.

The quiet ‘snick’ of the bathroom door latching shut catches Dave’s attention, even with his head under the hot spray of the water in the oversized walk-in shower, because of course it does. Dave is always super aware and hyper vigilant, even when in a relaxed environment. His eyes squeezed shut as he rinses the shampoo from his hair and back turned to the door he calls out, “it’ll be all yours in a minute, almost done here”

So when he hears the sound of the glass door sliding open and the cool air hitting his back, despite his offer to give up the shower momentarily, he chuckles. A low, raspy laugh from deep in his throat as he pushes his hair back on his head and finally turns around, his eyebrow raising in amusement as his gaze settles on his unexpected visitor standing just outside the shower door.

“Well, what have we here?”

Marcus doesn’t say a word. Too nervous he’ll psyche himself out if he attempts to speak. Instead he unwraps the towel from around his waist, leaving him fully naked and exposed, and tosses it to the ground behind him before stepping inside the enclosure and sliding the glass door shut behind him.

Dave waits, stock still, because he hadn’t been expecting this. Not that he should be too surprised, he supposed. It was probably bound to happen and truth be told he was far from mad about it. Over time he’d grown to care for Marcus a lot, and more than what he knew was realistic for a ‘friendship’. And with the fondness for Marcus growing so did the sexual tension, he supposed. It wasn’t immediate, as he had felt with you, but as he spent more and more time with both of you Marcus had unknowingly carved out a spot for himself under Dave’s skin, just as you had on that very first night he’d met you. It started out slowly, he would feel his own arousal spike watching Marcus get pleasure but he had chalked that up to being natural, not unlike getting off to watching porn. But then it started to change, and Dave began to wonder what it might be like for him to give Marcus that pleasure and earlier this evening he gave in and did exactly that. Holding his hands around Marcus as the younger man submitted to him and came with Dave’s mouth at his ear nearly had Dave spilling inside of you the moment Marcus let go. He loved hearing the sweet cries from Marcus’ perfect pouty lips as Dave held him tight to his naked chest. And the way you looked up at both of them, pure lust and adoration in your gaze he felt his chest constrict around his heart like it might just explode.

In that moment he wanted to just gather you both in his arms and tell you, beg you, to keep him.

And now, here Marcus stood just inches away from him, naked and vulnerable.

Dave was well and truly fucked.

Swallowing the thick lump in his throat from his nerves, Marcus carefully, slowly and wordlessly sinks to his knees in front of Dave and pauses. Peering up at him with those honeyed brown eyes, silently begging for whatever had come over him to be reciprocated. He’d woken up when he felt the weight under the mattress shift when Dave had gotten up and watched with more focus than what was probably considered appropriate at the back side of Dave’s naked form as he crossed the room and snagged a robe from the back of the door and threw it on. Marcus had to stifle a groan as he felt his cock instantly begin to swell at just the sight of the slightly older man before him. Once he exited the bedroom Marcus let out a sigh and dropped his head back to the pillow with a heavy thud, closing his eyes and focusing his breathing for a few seconds but still, his dick betrayed him. He rolled over to his side and watched your sleeping form, debating whether he should wake you to help him with his little situation or not but quickly dismissed the notion. He knew you must be exhausted, it wasn’t like you to be sleeping in the middle of the day so clearly you were worn out. Plus he’s pretty sure the actual reason for his current state of arousal just walked out the bedroom door anyway.

He lays in bed for as long as he can stand it, until he hears the shower come to life on the other side of the suite and his cock twitches again involuntarily, his mind conjuring up images of Dave naked and letting the hot spray of the water cascade all over his body and suddenly Marcus feels jealous over a fucking shower head of all things. Before long he finds himself getting up and out of bed, quickly tying a discarded towel around his waist before he leaves the bedroom and makes his way through the suite.

A grin spreads across Dave’s lips as the hot water continues to beat down his back and he reaches a hand forward, gripping the younger man’s jaw in his hand and angling him further upward as his thumb gently caresses back and forth at his cheek as he rasps out, “Well what are you waiting for, Champ? This cock isn’t going to suck itself”

After taking in a quick deep breath to steel his nerves, Marcus, ever obedient, presses forward. His eyes close as he takes Dave’s semi-hard length into his mouth, his lips wrapping around him as he finds his footing, as it were, never having actually done this before.

“Eyes on me Slugger” Dave tuts, hand going underneath Marcus’ chin and forcing his gaze upwards with the flick of a single knuckle. Marcus’ gaze is weak as he tries desperately to hold Dave’s but when he feels Dave begin to grow and swell against his tongue he gets a newfound confidence and can’t help the low moan that leaves his throat as he envelops him further into his mouth and finally begins to move his tongue and lips around him, licking and sucking and tasting every inch offered to him. He may not know exactly what he’s doing, but he does know what feels good to him and tries his best to mimic those same behaviors.

He pulls off for just a moment, collecting saliva in the back of his throat and messily spitting onto Dave’s length before he wraps his mouth around it again and begins to bob his head back and forth, letting his tongue drag along the underside as he swallows him down the best he can, easing off only slightly when the thick head of him nears too far to the back of his throat and causes him to momentarily gag before he resituates himself to a comfortable feel and can enthusiastically continue.

“Fuck, that’s it. Good boy,” Dave sighs, hand pushing through Marcus’ golden brown locks and a little whimper escapes Marcus at the subtle praise, eyelids fluttering shut for only a moment before he remembers Dave’s words from earlier and opens them again to hold Dave’s gaze. “You suck cock almost as good as your wife, you know that pretty boy?” Dave teases and despite himself, it only turns Marcus further on. He takes one hand and wraps it around the base of Dave’s cock to pump as much as his shaft that won’t fit in his mouth while the other hand goes to his own aching need as he begins stroking himself to the same pace that his head bobs.

“Fuck” Dave curses again, a little breathless this time as his head tilts back into the spray of water. He wraps his hand around the back of Marcus’ head and helps him by setting the pace that he wants, fast and rough and nearly hitting the back of Marcus’ throat each time his hips jut forward. Marcus does his best to take him but before long he’s coughing, sputtering, gagging and gasping for breath as he pulls off of him after just a few short seconds of Dave fucking his throat, a long strand of saliva still connecting him to the now rock hard cock in his face and Dave lets out a little chuckle at Marcus’ obvious inexperience.

“Well, maybe you could learn a thing or two” Dave laughs. “Up,” he commands suddenly, hand gripping under Marcus’ bicep and hauling him quickly to his feet. Marcus goes willingly, all too eager to comply as Dave turns him to face the wall, grabs both of his hands and forces them above his head and flat against the warm tiles. Dave quickly crowds his space, stepping up behind him, the hot, hard length of him pressed right up against Marcus’ lower back.

His breathing laboured, Marcus tenses momentarily but then relaxes as he feels a large wet hand slide down his side, across the smooth skin of his hip and lower still until it ghosts over the globes of his ass and then back up to hold firmly at his hip again as Dave leans forward, breath hot against Marcus’ ear.

“Colour?” He asks and Marcus takes a steadying breath.

“Green. Uh… green. I - I think” he stammers out nervously. Dave hums before his hand snakes forward to grasp around Marcus’ hard, leaking cock and gives it a light squeeze that has Marcus whimpering.

“I’d say you’re doing just fine” Dave taunts before he languidly strokes Marcus a few times, causing his knees to nearly buckle as a desperate whine escapes his lips.

“I’m uh.. I’ve never.. with…” Marcus trails off, his eyes squeezing shut when Dave gently ruts into his back, his hand still slowly stroking him. “H-Have you?”

“When you’re young and in your prime and stuck in the service for twelve plus months at a time, a warm mouth is a warm mouth” Dave shrugs nonchalantly. “But it’s not something I indulged in often, or ever pursued outside of that environment” he adds, still slowly working Marcus over with shallow pumps of his fist. “Truth be told I’ve never looked at or even thought twice about another man. That is, until you”. He finishes the last part quietly, like it's a secret he can’t voice out loud.

“S-same here” Marcus stutters, eyes squeezed shut as he focuses on his breathing, hoping to stave off his orgasm for at least a little while longer. “Did you ever, ah fuck” Marcus groans, trailing off as his train of thought leaves him when Daves hand comes up to pay special attention to the head of his cock, his hand twisting just right over and over again at the sensitive tip.

“Did I ever what? Hmmm?” Dave taunts, hand stilling around Marcus as he lowers his hips slightly and presses further against him, his stiff length now pressing into the meat of Marcus’ asscheek. “Did I ever fuck a man’s tight little asshole?” He asks into the shell of Marcus’ ear and Marcus shudders before biting back a moan and nodding his head.

“No” Dave answers honestly. “Why, did you want to be the first?” He chuckles, rutting into him and Marcus lets out a stuttering gasp before shaking his head against the tiles.

“I don’t think… I’m not… No. I… I don’t know” Marcus answers helplessly, his shoulders tensing.

“Relax baby, relax” Dave soothes, pulling his hips back slightly but resting his forehead on Marcus’ shoulder. “You don’t have to be ready for that right now. And to be honest, if my cock is going to be in your ass then I want yours inside your wife so I can fuck you both at the same time” he chuckles darkly into the heated skin of Marcus’ back and a shiver passes through Marcus’ whole body at just the thought of that.

“Oh you like that don’t you” Dave laughs again. Feeling Marcus twitch in his hand gets Dave’s dominant confidence swelling in his chest again and he easily slips into the role he prefers to play, where he feels the most comfortable and less vulnerable.

“Wanna be the meat in our little fuck sandwich, sweet boy?” Dave taunts, his hand going back to slowly stroking Marcus again. “You gonna fuck your tight little ass against my fat cock while you’re buried inside of her?”

“Jesus, fuck” Marcus groans. He’d never once judged his wife for what she was into, but now he understood it first hand. The way Dave could have you falling apart just by the words that leave his mouth.

“Maybe a little friendly competition, see who can cum inside of who first” he laughs darkly and Marcus’ whole body shudders as a wrecked moan escapes him.

Dave hands picks up the pace a little as Marcus squeezes his eyes shut, face resting against his own forearm and teeth clenched as Dave draws him closer and closer to that edge he’s been teetering on since he sunk to his knees in front of the man in question just minutes ago.

He didn’t know what came over him, what possessed him to get out of bed and follow after Dave, but he couldn’t get what happened earlier out of his head. The way Dave had wrapped his hand around his throat, called him his good boy, and made him cum so hard his vision nearly blacked out. He needed more. Dave was like a drug, he understood it now. An addiction, a craving that could never be satisfied, always leaving you wanting more.

His breath catches in his throat when he feels Dave’s free hand that’s not currently wrapped around him back at his ass, a single finger sliding through the cleft of his wet cheeks until it stops to tease at his hole. The pad of his finger presses at the puckered flesh but doesn’t breach inside, just wanting to rile Marcus up and it is absolutely working as the younger man whimpers and squirms under Dave’s hands. Dave shifts slightly so that the water beats down more so on Marcus, ensuring he’s not dry as Dave continues to tease him.

“Colour” Dave demands again, finger pressing in again with just a fraction more pressure than the previous time.

“Green, fuck. Please” Marcus is trembling, his body leaning against the wall the only thing holding him upright and he feels the smirk reach across Dave’s face from where his mouth is still pressed to his ear.

“That’s my good boy” Dave chuckles. The sound of Dave spitting a giant glob of saliva between Marcus’ cheeks is downright sinful as it echoes off the four walls of the shower enclosure and Marcus has to bite into the meat of his own arm to keep from moaning too loudly when Dave finally pushes a single saliva slicked finger just inside as he continues to stroke Marcus’ length with delicate precision.

“Oh my god, oh fuck! I’m - ” Marcus cries out at the welcomed intrusion of Dave’s finger, barely inside but slowly moving back and forth creating just enough of a foreign pressure that it’s enough to push Marcus over that edge within seconds. He orgasms with a wrangled cry leaving his lips, spurts of his warm spend splattering onto the tiles in front of him and down Dave’s hand that still loosely grips him as he continues to pump him dry.

“That’s it” Dave’s voice soothes against his ear, still gently working him over with both hands as Marcus comes down from his high. “So good for your Daddy, hmmm?”

“Mmmhmmm, fuck” Marcus groans out once more, leaning heavily into the tiles now, shoulders and chest heaving with each laboured breath he takes. He lets out another whimper as Dave gently slips his finger out, sighs happily when he feels Dave’s lips press into his shoulder blade.

“Okay?” Dave breathes against Marcus' warm flesh, checking in with him and the younger man can do little but eagerly nod his head, still trembling in the aftershocks of his orgasm. Dave’s hand still wrapped around Marcus’ length finally slows to a stop and he releases him fully, both arms coming up to wrap around Marcus’ middle and hold him tight against his chest for a long moment and Marcus sighs happily, sated, leaning into the warmth Dave offers. He does his best to ignore the little flutter he feels in his chest as Dave's lips continue to pepper little kisses across the back of his neck and shoulders, wills his own heart to stop hammering in his chest when Dave breathes in deep and then rests his check against Marcus' back, apparently content to just hold him until his own breathing evens out.

“What um… what about you?” Marcus asks meekly. He hadn’t exactly gotten to finish what he’d started earlier once the attention shifted to him and his own pleasure. He can still feel Dave pressed into his back, though with the delay for his own gratification Dave has softened somewhat again, his needs seemingly less urgent now.

“Let me finish getting cleaned up in here and then why don’t we meet back in bed, hmm?” He finishes his thought with a sharp little smack to Marcus’ ass and chuckles before he bites down gently onto his shoulder. “See if you can wake up that wife of yours while you’re at it”

“Yeah, o-okay” Marcus stammers, stealing himself for a moment before he heaves a deep sigh, lets his shoulders relax and finally reaches for the shower door and slides it open. Dave lets him go, watches with piqued interest as Marcus bends over to pick up his earlier discarded towel and secure it back around his waist again, and then, he’s gone. Door closing shut behind him again and leaving Dave to finish his shower in privacy.

Dave is doing his best to act nonchalant, normal, though nothing about what just took place was normal for either of them. He’d never held another man in an embrace like that before and found himself not even wanting to let go. It took everything in him not to spin Marcus around and hold him even closer. And it wasn’t just sexual, this feeling he suddenly had. Though that part was definitely good too, but now he felt himself feeling suddenly nervous about going back out there, like he was completely transparent and the two of you would see through him immediately. He dreads the day, and he has a feeling it’s coming soon, that the two of you extract yourselves from his life. He knows the texts and visits will become fewer and farther between until suddenly he stops hearing from you all together and he’ll go back to his life before the two of you were in it, wishing he’d never gone along with it in the first place because then he wouldn’t be in the fucking predicament he found himself in now.

He should put a stop to this himself before that happens, he thinks. Like a bandaid, just rip it off and the pain will dissipate before he even notices it’s there, right? He can fake a work emergency, or say somethings come up with his children and he needs to cut this weekend short. You’ll both understand, of course you will. Maybe even be secretly relieved that you can spend the rest of your time here together with just the two of you.

He’s doing everyone a favour, he thinks.

Mind made up, he takes a little extra time than necessary in the shower, turning the temperature way down to hopefully rid him of what’s left of his hard-on and finishes cleaning himself off, being sure to scrub every inch of his body to wash away any lingering traces of this weekend from his skin, hopefully soon enough from his memory. He takes the removable shower hose off the fixture as well and sprays down the tiles where Marcus’ cum still lingers, watching it wash down the drain past his feet and then hangs the shower head back up and finally turns the taps off and steps out.

Speech fully prepared in his head, what he didn’t expect was to walk back into the bedroom to see you with a very worried expression on your face and for a moment, he feels his heart literally fall into his stomach. Did Marcus just confess what happened and you’re so enraged you’re about to throw him out on his ass? Throw your husband out too? Likely not the latter, he thinks. If anything it’s probably further cementing the fact that the two of you need Dave out of your lives, he’s only going to cause problems in what is a beautiful, perfect marriage.

“You have to go?!” He hears you say and oh. So Marcus is leaving? He asks what’s going on and then just hangs back after Marcus responds to him but then focuses his attention back to you, Dave idly listening to the conversation in the background as your husband continues to apologize to you about an apparent “work emergency” that’s come up.

Dave was already set in his decision to leave, but with Marcus going he knows he really, really needs to leave. Being alone with you might just kill him, and he doesn’t deserve a death that blissful, he reasons with himself.

Not long after saying an endearing goodbye to you, Marcus brushes past Dave with a vague ‘see ya later’ and just like that, he’s gone and Dave is left alone with the person currently possessing the other half of his traitorous heart. The heart that wasn’t supposed to fall for either of these two people who already belonged to each other, let alone apparently falling for both of them.

Marcus is in the cab, half way back to his own house where he most certainly does not have any type of work emergency waiting for him, when he starts an inner battle with himself about just what in the fuck he is doing. Should he have left? Should he turn around right now and go back and stop being a fucking coward? What the hell was he supposed to do?

He felt so fucking guilty the moment his orgasm ripped through him like a freight train with Dave’s hands on him and you nowhere in sight that he just couldn’t get out of that hotel room fast enough. He had cheated on you, in his mind. What’s worse is that it wasn’t even all sexual, though that is how it started and how he pursued it but his feelings for Dave were beginning to get overwhelming and he thought maybe if he just ‘got it out of his system’ he could forget about it and move on, but then Dave had to go and fucking hold him afterwards and asked him back to bed and his throat just plummeted into his stomach. How could he just walk out of that bathroom and pretend that never happened? Is that what Dave wanted? Or did Dave want you to know exactly what happened? How would you react? Marcus didn’t even have his own feelings about the whole thing sorted out, he couldn’t expect you to understand. He crossed a line, that much he knew.

Ultimately he decided to let the cab driver continue to their destination. He was already well on his way home anyway, might as well keep going. He’d fix himself some dinner, maybe a drink and just have some time alone to sort out his thoughts before he joins you back at the hotel. He briefly wonders if Dave will still be there when he gets back. If he is, maybe it would be a good time for the three of you to have a conversation, one that’s surely long overdue. Marcus hopes he doesn’t have to speak first. What if he voices what he thinks he’s truly feeling and you all look at him like he’s grown a second head?

He’s equally worried at both ends. He’s worried that Dave, despite the tender moments he is occasionally capable of showing, might laugh the whole thing off. He signed up to be a fun ‘playmate’ for a couple of weekends here and there, not a more permanent fixture in an already existing and functioning marriage. And you… what would you even think? Sure Marcus knows you’ve warmed to Dave over the months during your encounters but you’d never discussed with Marcus that you’d felt anything for the man in question outside of sexual desire. Not to mention what would you think of him if he asked you to have another man be an active participant in your relationship? The last thing he wants is you feeling like you’re not enough for him or that something is missing from your marriage.

It would kill him if this drove any kind of rift between the two of you. No, he needs to shut up and keep whatever is in his head and his heart to himself and hope things sort themselves out. He’ll start to distance himself (and hopefully you both) from Dave and you can go back to your lives. He cares about Dave, far more than what he knows is appropriate, but he can’t lose you. He won’t.

Marcus finishes his dinner, accompanied by a rich glass of wine, and waits a while, letting his food settle and his mind attempt to find peace within the waging war that are his thoughts still battling on inside his head. A few hours since he’d left the hotel pass before he finally heads back outside to his car and types the address of the hotel into his GPS.

Dave York is a bad man. He knows it the moment he reaches the penthouse floor again, not even thirty minutes since he left it, and lifts his fist to knock at the hotel room door. He'd had every intention of getting into his car and leaving this place. Just one drink first, he'd reasoned with himself, then he'd leave.

He knew shouldn’t be here at your door now. Not without Marcus. Though, he supposes he shouldn’t have been in the shower with Marcus without you, either. Marcus knows it, clearly. It’s the only explanation for why he high-tailed it out of there with some half-assed lie of an excuse of having a work emergency on a Saturday night. Dave saw right through it of course but didn’t voice his concern, he certainly wouldn’t do that in front of you. He wouldn’t wedge himself further into the complications of your marriage than he already was.

He’s really fucked this up. But he knows, even before you pull open that door, that tonight is his last chance. The last time he’ll allow himself to see you before he forces himself to go back to his old life so you can have yours back with your husband. And if he was a better man, he would’ve just left earlier when he said he was going to and not come to see you one last time, knowing full well what he was doing and feeling and how it might affect you. How it might affect Marcus, and moreover how it might affect your relationship with Marcus.

But Dave York was not a better man. Not a good man.

Dave York was a bad, bad man.

"Hi" you breathe out the moment the door swings open and lands on him leaning against the frame on the other side.

"Hi"

Marcus lets himself into the hotel suite, quietly and carefully making his way through the rooms that are bathed in darkness, only slivers of moonlight peaking through where the curtains aren’t fully shut. Pushing open the double doors to the bedroom he frowns but is otherwise not surprised to find you sleeping alone in the bed that now seems comically oversized for just your body alone, especially given how crowded it was only hours earlier.

He glances around the room, pulling out his phone and turning on the flashlight, making sure not to shine it on you so as to not wake you up. He tilts it around the room, looking everywhere but there's no sign of Dave. His belongings seem to be gone, his duffel bag no longer occupying the corner of the bedroom where it was before. Marcus had walked through the living room to get to the bedroom so he knows he wasn’t asleep on the couch either.

Dave was gone.

Clicking off the flashlight and before he can talk himself out of doing so, Marcus taps on the Messages icon on his screen, wanting to send a quick text to your group chat, just to ensure wherever Dave was, everything was OK.

Once again Marcus gets that all too familiar feeling of his throat falling into the pit of his stomach when he reads the tiny grayed out letters that greet him at the bottom of your conversation.

Dave York has left the group.

Dun Dun Dunnnnnn! I am so sorry, but believe it or not this was my plan for this series all along from the moment you guys lovingly bullied me into turning my one-shot into a series, lol. Fear not though, we haven't seen the last of our dear Dave. He's just a bit of an idiot, and is going to continue to be one for a little while, but have faith in me.

Next Chapter

I really appreciate you taking the time to read this chapter! If you liked it please leave me a little note or a reblog, it means the world to me!

Taglist (if you want to be added - or removed!, lmk!) @senaar-ika @suzdin @boliv-jenta @prolix-yuy @vabeachazn @seasonalobession @pedroshotwifey @nerdieforpedro @chronically-ghosted @macabremads @survivingandenduring @theywhowriteandknowthings @axshadows @iamasaddie @vickywallace @lincolndjarin @its-nebuleuse @janaispunk @missladym1981 @heareball @staywildflowahchild @guelyury @anotherpedrolover @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @runningmom94 @yorksgirl @harrington-thedad @missyorkswhore @disassociation-daydreams

#pedro pascal cinematic universe #dave york #marcus pike #pedro pascal character fanfiction #dave york fanfiction #dave york smut #marcus pike fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #marcus pike x dave york #marcus pike smut #ppcu #ppcu fanfiction

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becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys · 3 months

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Hi Elanor, we met briefly on the taping of your husband's fringe show and you were super nice, no good deed etc. I'm pretty sure I've seen you post about lecturing at a uni.

I've been thinking about heading back to uni for a master's, with the possibility of a career shift into academia after, but I'm somewhat wary of the lack of job security with fixed term contracts and such, and just generally unsure how one goes about getting a job teaching at uni. Most people I know in academia are primarily interested in research, with the idea of lecturing being mostly incidental, I'm almost the other way around.

How did you get started in your field, and how much of that do you think applies to new entrants today? Did you have to/get to make a choice between research and lecturing? Any insight you might have, or a starting point for further research would be greatly appreciated.

Hello again! It was lovely meeting you!

Sure, yes, so, my path in began as an HPL - an hourly paid lecturer. A colleague on my old degree course was signed off work with stress, so another old lecturer of mine was asking if any graduates wanted to do a bit of lecturing to cover him. It coincided with my job losing its main funding and so going to part time hours, so it worked.

It started as one module for one semester. Which became the module for the year, then two and a half the following year, then four the next two years. And then, under UK law, if you hold an HPL contract with the same institution for four years, they have to give you a proper contract, so now I'm on a permanent four days a week with full lecturer status.

And then if you do it that way round i.e. become a lecturer before holding a teaching qualification, the uni will pay to put you through a PCET - I'm due to finish my PCET in May this year.

HPL work... Well. There are advantages and disadvantages to this approach. HPLs are the lecturing equivalent of hospital cleaning staff - absolutely vital and chronically overlooked and underpaid. It's a zero hours position, so you get paid only for the time you spend actually delivering the lectures, at a rate (IIRC it was about £33 per hour?) that assumes one hour's prep for every two hours lecture. Needless to say, prepping a two hour lecture takes longer than an hour. You also don't get paid for the marking you do, and you receive basically no guidance on how to actually teach - best case scenario is that they can give you copies of the lecture slides used by previous academics in the role, which you can use as a guide or amend to your liking. And the final topping on the shit cake is that HPL contracts run for a semester at a time, so they very much fall into the 'precarious employment' bracket.

But, as I say, you can very quickly make yourself indispensable, and then after four years they have to give you a contract. Or, you just do it to mine it for the experience for a CV. I've known people who did HPL work for two unis at once while studying a PCET and then walked into a proper position in a third elsewhere.

Because the other root is to get a Masters, get a PCET (as part of which you need to do a placement anyway), and then apply for lecturer roles. Again, advantages and disadvantages - these days, lecturer roles are hotly contested. But it's very possible, I know many who have done it.

So! Regarding the other part of your question!

Some universities are more teaching focused, others are more research focused, some are a bit of both. If you know that the main thing you want to do is the teaching part, then you want to give priority to the universities that are more teaching focused themselves. These are usually the non-Russell Group prestigious ones, particularly the ones with a slightly more local student body. Anything with a qualifier like 'Metropolitan' after its name, either now or in the recent past, is a good idea - in Wales, for example, UWTSD includes the old Swansea Met, USW includes the old Cardiff Met, etc. Those are more teaching focused institutions (and therefore better at serving non traditional students, too, especially disabled ones), so in career terms, those are handy to shoot for.

(Also, those can have high turnovers of research academics by contrast. So it's usually relatively easy to get HPL work from them to plug employment gaps.)

Anyway - that's me. Good luck if you do decide to try it! Let me know if you have any other questions

#asks #the professional world of careers and tasks

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tzyuki · 11 months

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hiiii 🎐 anon here !!

loved ur writing for my last request !! it was adorable and thank you so much <333

here for when you have time, how about enhypen reaction to idol!reader (not dating) being super confident, similar to park gyuri from kara, just like publicly and privately in love with themselves 😭 not in a degrading way towards others of course ! just in a purely “yea i know i’m pretty” type of way

thank you luv 🫶🫶

— (05.30.23) ENHA-QUESTS

IN WHICH ✶ enha loves their crushes confidence!

genre 𓏸 ͘ ࣭⸰ enha x idol!reader. fluff fluff fluff!!!

warnings 𓏸 ͘ ࣭⸰ swearing, if any more please tell me!

ej note 𓏸 ͘ ࣭⸰ hi🎐 anon !!! i’m glad you enjoyed the last one!

⏤ ☆ yang jungwon / 양정원

jungwon has never seen another person as confident as you since he’s met sunghoon. at first he actually thought you and sunghoon would make a perfect match, but when he got to hang out with you more he started to love your company and your confident personality.

⏤ ☆ lee heeseung / 이희승

you two became fast friends, constantly joking about being attractive like for example; acting like you guys are in a kdrama with the camera and you guys are the main leads waking the viewers up.

͏͏⏤ ☆ park jongseong / 박종성

you constantly hype him up bc he doesn’t know how fine he is. he gets shy at your confidence and compliments. he didn’t think he would meet a girl so open and confident as you. he admires your confidence in your looks and your energy you give off to everyone else with it.

͏͏⏤ ☆ sim jaeyun / 심재윤

when you guys did a tiktok challenge together for your guys comeback he asked if you wanted to look at yourself before posting it and you said some shit like “it’s okay i know i look good today” and he’d laugh at you bc of your silly confidence, you two js clicked instantly.

͏͏⏤ ☆ park sunghoon / 박성훈

oh you two were js THAT duo. once you had debuted and clips of you being in love with yourself went viral everyone had been hoping you and sunghoon would meet during promotions. and that you guys did. once you guys met backstage he had mentioned seeing your viral clips and that you had reminded him of himself.

⏤ ☆ kim sunoo / 김선우

you guys were already friends and every time you complimented yourself or said something like “i look so good today.” he would jokingly side eye you, you two were comfortable enough with each other to joke like that.

⏤ ☆ nishimura riki / 西村力

you guys were filming content for the label and you two had checked yourself out in the cameras at different times, saying stuff like “engene don’t i look really handsome today” and “tmi, i’m the cutest today.” fans had pointed out this moment and giggled over it. you and ni-ki didn’t really talk despite being label mates but when he had seen the clips he wanted to be friends with you because of that little moment and the similarities he felt between you two whilst he watched the short content show.

enha-masterlist — permanent taglist (open) ; @jangwonie @cwsana @luvyrin @amara-mars @ineedaherosavemeenow @mintydayeon @love-4-keum @kpopx-xlover @abdiitcryy @beepjeongie @ox1-lovesick @ja4hyvn @shinsou-rii @winkura @ddeonudepressions @tnyhees @wannabeyn @kpoprhia @svnghoonsonly

#enhypen fluff #enhypen #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #enhypen smau #enhypen imagines #enhypen drabbles #niki enhypen #heeseung enhypen #enhypen jungwon #enhypen sunghoon #jay enhypen #enhypen sunoo #enhypen jake

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autisticlancemcclain · 6 months

Text

fic rec friday 46

hello and welcome to fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

habits of my heart by tusslee

Keith swallowed nervously, afraid to ask what it was Lance wanted, but his mouth was ahead of his brain, “What do you want then?” “You. All the time. In every sense. It’s insane.” Lance said with a laugh that sounded a little manic. “I want to hold your hand and shit. I want to just be near you, like some love-sick girl, but I think that’s what I am. I think I fucking love you, holy shit.”

no bc i need yall to understand how batshit insane i went when reading this specific piece of dialgue in-story the first time. im pretty sure i actually gasped out loud. the easy immediate and pained you oh i did not recover for a long ass time

2. falling by tusslee

Lance was also not entirely the idiot everyone thought him to be. Oblivious in some aspects, yes. Naïve to an extent, also yes. But Lance knew a little bit of the psychology behind dreams and how they were basically your subconscious projecting your fears, or whatever. Okay so he didn’t know the exact details, but he knew enough to piece together why his fear of falling was quickly becoming the main focus of his dreams night after night. And of course like everything else that went wrong in Lance’s life, it was Keith’s fault.

I LOVE ME SOME GAY METAPHORS ‼️‼️‼️ like i wonder why you are afraid of falling lance!! and i wonder what is going to soothe that fear!! hm!!! what mystery!!! what intrigue!! HM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3. curing space blues by tusslee

The weightlessness of zero gravity doesn’t apply to feelings, Lance learns.

i'll read homesick lance and awkward but determined to help keith a thousand times in a thousand different ways idc. it never ever gets old. bc it's just so true that is what happened is it not. this is them

4. wherever you will go by tusslee

“I want to be someone you count on and come to when you’re upset. I want to be important to you, Lance, because you’re really important to me.” Silence stretched between them when Keith lost the nerve to continue. He kept his eyes on their hands, noticed the color contrast between them and wondered if it’d look so profound if it was more than just their fingers twined together.

first of all. lance calling keith red and keith calling lance pretty. send tweet. second of all. choked up by his own difficulty expressing emotions but so deeply loving that he tries anyway keith makes me actually sob with my real tears every single time. without fail. keith i love you keith you are so everything keith you do all that you do with everything you have to give

5. Guy That I'd Kinda be Into by spirkylurkey

Lotor thinks Lance is cute. So does Keith. They're all in a floating space-castle together. This is going to be a problem. i miss the good old days!! when messy dumb comedic gay love triangles were abundant!! they were so much fun!! and so for you i present a messy dumb comedic gay love triangle. i also miss the animatic that used to exist with the song from the title. old voltron you were a mess and a half and i miss you truly

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

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mrs-monaghan · 11 months

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well, i see that your blog is cock friendly, and even tho its a jikook blog, there is something that i think we should adress (i'm not saying that this could be a reason for jk's crush, im not saying it could not), but...

Namjoon's cock!!!!! I suare, if everything in that body is proporcional, you know, i mean YOU KNOW he is fucking big!

Oh anon I really wish you hadn't gone there.

Now we must talk about JK and his anti Minimoni agenda. We now need to delve into this and get to the root of the issue. We must!

Jimin's hand on RM's lap.

JK: 👀

Love it. Okay let's take a look at some photos, shall we? Jimin's type.

Oh wait, before we proceed, JK's crush on RM i have never thought of it as an actual true crush. I think its played of as such for laughs. But I think JK just really admired him for his talents and what not and I don't think JK is attracted to RM in the slightest. Not even a little bit. Imo.

Now back to Jimin's type. 😁

Number 1) Wonho

Number 2) Black interviewer

Number 3) Usher

Number 4) JB who is basically JK's doppelganger in some of his photos 😅

Number 5) Gonna casually drop Tony

And last but not least Number 6) The main topic:

Jimin has a type. Okay? He likes them muscles and them thick men and them hot men and them arms and chests...and thighs... anyway, Mimi has a type. And while none of the men above hold a candle to his actual boyfriend, you can see the similarities.

Jungtiddies. Check

Thighs. Check

Arms. Check

The whole damn body. Check

Where I'm I going with this you ask? In short what I'm trying to say is, RM is Jimin's type. My friends and I disected this the other day and concluded the JK Minimoni thing probably has something to do with the fact that RM is Jimin's type to a T. JK looks at RM and sees himself. And then add the fact that RM is a genius and JK's insecurity goes through the roof!

(And like anon mentioned, JK has that Jungkonda, yes but on this post I also share what RM is working with so.... like I said. JK & RM, same thing basically 😂)

See, yeah, JK comes between Yoonmin and hates that Suga thirsts over his man. But, he is not threatened by short, skinny legged, with an ass almost as big as Jimin's, Min Yoongi. He knows Jimin will never see Suga that way. So he can dislike how Suga behaves with Jimin, but sometimes he even ignores it and doesn't look bothered at all. But when it comes to Minimoni he just has to insert himself. For eg, I saw something today.

Look at Jimin's face after JK adds in his 2 cents because of course he did

Minimoni moment, JK is like "not today Satan" He refuses for the audience to associate Jimin with RM and its the funniest shit. I mention here how JK inserted himself when Minimoni were practising the own it dance. Even though he wasn't really supposed to be there.

Disclaimer: The following opinions are my own, I will give them but please feel free to form your own

So listen. I will be the first person to tell people to stop treating the Tannies like characters in a fanfic. And I have mentioned many times that there has never been any in house dating (sans Jikook) That just wouldn't work and BTS wouldn't be together if that was the case. So please, please try not to read too much into the following tiny analysis. It's just something a friend pointed out to me and I couldn't believe it myself. It's short and quick, easy to miss. But it shows just how deep this thing with JK and Minimoni goes.

Okay so In the Soop season 2 episode 3 around 6 minutes in. (Thanks @serendipitous-sky)

Jin tells JK to go wake up either Jimin or V. Of course JK goes to wake up Jimin. Duh!

Sidebar, this isn't the point of my post, I just feel the need to point out that Jikook look at cameras ALOT. The whole time he climbed the stairs on the way to Jimin's room he was staring at that camera

If you guys remember correctly, Jimin was kind enough to switch rooms with RM the night before. RM couldn't sleep in the main house due to all the noise. So they swapped. But JK forgot this. So off he goes to what he thinks is still Jimin's room (he cheated/helped Jimin to get this room btw, but that's an analysis for another day) Anyway, back to JK looking for cameras.

If you're looking to mess around with your boyfriend and not get caught its important to find blind spots. So yes, Jikook are always making sure they know exactly where those cameras are. I'm sure y'all get it. 😏😏

Anyway, off he goes into the room and he's surprised to be greeted by RM's snores.

He forgot this wasn't Jimin's room anymore. But guys, here's my thing. JK is here, right? He has heard and seen that that is RM asleep in that bed, right? So you'd expect him to leave, right?

Wrong!! JK goes further into the room!

But why 🤭🤭🤭 that's my question. He had already established that was RM in the bed why did he need to go further into the room? What did he need to see? He literally has no reason to confirm it's RM in that bed when he already knows it is. So my guess is that he wanted to confirm RM was in that bed alone.

Now hear me out, even if Jimin was in that bed lying down fully clothed just shooting the shit with RM, it would not have gone down very well. At all. Shit, would have hit, the fucking fan!

We definitely wouldn't have go10 a season 2 of ITS or anymore BTS for that matter 🤭🤭 I'm just saying, for the sake of a million things, I'm glad RM was in there by himself.

JK as he's leaving says;

And off he goes to look for Jimin. We already know what happens after this. Nothing, coz we were robbed.

But anyway, conclusion: RM is the only one who actually threatens JK. And no this doesn't mean he doesn't trust Jimin. He knows Jimin would never but it doesn't stop him from wanting to make sure everyone most especially RM, remembers who Jimin 'belongs' to.

The End. Stan Namjikook for clear skin

#he he hee #jikook theory #jikook theories #jikook analysis #ask shaz #bts ask #jikook #bts #jimin and jungkook #jimin #jungkook #park jimin #jeon jungkook #kookmin #minkook #jikook bothered #ITS Jikook

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mcytblr-archive · 1 month

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Early MCYTblr Interviews: georgeeehd

today's interviewee is reese/georgeeehd/lmanburg/tommyofcolor! dreamlying member, mcytblr og, and the person who discovered that dream wasn't registered to vote. below is a transcript of questions and answers!

Q: What was your experience in wider MCYTblr?

A: I don’t have much experience with wider mcytblr. Maybe I used to reblog Grian stuff on my main blog, before all this DSMP shit. There wasn’t much of a Dream community when I started posting, much less one for DreamNotFound (surprisingly, Dreamnap was the popular ship of the two early on????? so bizarre to me), so I dug out my microcosm immediately. There was never a wider myctblr for me.

Q: What was your experience in critblr/dreamlying specifically?

A: The notion that dreamlying is the spawn of critblr is interesting to me, because I agree with you now, but I wouldn’t have at the time. Critblr was a tumblr community. Dreamlying was a friend group, predating critblr. I considered myself dteamblr for a really long time— I never felt aligned with the critblr movement because that was always Jason’s territory, really. I don’t mention it to nitpick or to scold, but like, I’m into this archiving thing, too, so I wanted to opine on how we label these groups. Maybe there should be a distinction made between what we considered ourselves vs. what we actually were.

My experience in proto-critblr was pretty cushy because it was all mine. Me and my contemporaries had a following, we were respected, we had smart things to say, we were funny, established, etc. Think, “The School of Athens.” I definitely grew a bit of an ego with how popular I was, which I’m sure will come across in this interview, haha.

At times I felt a little unchallenged, like people were only agreeing with me not because I was right, but because I was saying anything at all. At the same time, I was incredibly defensive and insecure, so the little pushback I might have gotten would bother me terribly. I was probably overreactive and mean. I was fifteen then, and I’m nineteen now, so there’s lots of things I would’ve handled differently, if I could.

In terms of my experience with dreamlying, I like what Ozzie had to say. We were all just very, very good friends. There’s not much else to it. In my first discord server, “dream lying” was a hidden messaging channel where we could critique Dream Team freely. “Dream lying” was supposed to parody the phrase “dream truthing.” So we were basically this tiny little secret society, at the start. There was no way we wouldn’t have hit it off.

Q: Are there any events that stand out to you?

A: A lot. Too many. Some are more personally relevant than historically relevant, and I don’t really know where to draw the line. The voter registration fiasco was a big one, but there were other smaller things… I was always in some fuckin’ controversy or another! The magic 8 ball says, Ask again later.

Q: Was being in MCYTblr an overall positive or negative experience for you?

A: Undoubtedly positive! I don’t even know where to start with this question. I met a lot of wonderful people that I still keep in contact with today, right? But beyond that, I feel like being in this community helped me grow a lot, like, personally. I was thinking and writing a lot. I learned so, so much, about people, about the internet, about fandom, about myself. It was such an expansive experience.

I guess I should mention that my time with mcytblr was incredibly stressful. My involvement in the fandom weighed heavily on my mental health. I felt very watched, and I still do. At my worst, I was hospitalized. (I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t mention my mcyt-induced mental hospital stint in my mcyt interview.) None of that really moves me, though, ‘cause it was all just part of the experience, and I find it all pretty funny, looking back.

Q: A few people have mentioned the account mcyttruth in relation to you, specifically around a callout post. What happened there? [I had misremembered-- I meant to ask this to Jason lmanburg, not Reese lmanburg.]

A: The mcyttruth callout wasn’t about me, but my discord server, dteamblr 2. I was not as involved here— at this point, critblr was in full bloom, and this server was like a rendezvous for people who liked dreamlying and modcord blogs (modcord was another friend group, like dreamlying, but critblr-based).

Regarding that callout specifically, I don’t know. Probably, there were too many r-slurs, too many jokes about hating Ranboo, the usual. There were a lot of callouts (for me or for people I was friends with), and I never really took them seriously. I mean, honestly, the url “mcyttruth” alone is derivative. Do you know how many times I’ve read the words “mcyt” and “truth”? Everything about this is a blur to me.

Q: I suppose I would ask-- given the current events surrounding many of the creators who were popular in 2020/2021, do you feel that dreamlying has been vindicated in their criticisms of creators?

A: Yes, but I would have said yes in 2020, because who these people are was as obvious to me then as it is now. Our criticisms weren’t like, headcanons that we made up to be mean, they were plain old observations. Wilbur was openly mentally ill, creepy, and generally dismissive of other people. Not to say that there aren’t good things about him either, but, of course this is the kind of guy to make his girlfriend clean up after him. There’s a million cautionary tales about guitar stringers with floppy hair under a beanie, whiny song lyrics, and a masturbatory approach to self-loathing.

Dream’s not this person anymore, so that’s not why I bring it up, but think back to when his old Reddit account was exposed for being active on r/The_Donald. That was everything we were ever talking about! That was Dream being exactly who he was— a young white man from Florida. I love Dream, always have, always will. Acknowledging that he is/was a whole person with flaws and unsavory politics, I think, is truer fanhood than the idolization everyone puts him through.

You use the word “vindicated” to acknowledge that we were heavily criticized ourselves. Most of that was on the basis of privacy— you know, whether or not it’s okay to speculate on people’s personal lives. It doesn’t matter that we were “right” so often, that we still are, and always will be, because people will focus more on the original sin of having speculated in the first place.

I used to love vindication because it made me feel smart, like I could see things that no one else could. Now it just makes me sad. I don’t think it has anything to do with smarts, nor would I care if it did. I think people just don’t let themselves think that far. You know, “I don’t want to make assumptions,” “It’s none of my business,” “It’s not that deep,” etc. Maybe there’s no instinct to look deeper at all. It really just makes me sad.

Q: Is there anything else you'd like to add/have archived?

A: I’d like to ask everybody to stay critical. The hivemind response to recent events have shown me that this fandom remains as shallow, unthinking, conformative, elementary… as it was four years ago.

Thank you for conducting these interviews in the first place. It's nice hearing everyone’s voices again.

#early mcytblr interviews #Volume 13 #georgeeehd

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stylexrepp · 2 months

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I wrote this a while ago and I decided I don’t want to work on it anymore so I’m posting this no proof!! (Sorry if it’s god awful and hard to read)

✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰

Bully - Eddie X Reader

You had been stuck sitting next to Eddie in every single one of your classes since the day you started kindergarten.

At first he seemed like a normal little boy until he decided it would be fun to drag you around by your pigtails at recess every day, and laugh along with the other kids. As his bullying continued, you gained courage in middle school to snap back at him. Giving him ugly looks anytime he was in your line of sight or punching his arms as hard as you could manage when he’d let out a raunchy comment. But when you got to high school the roles reversed completely, you were now the bully.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP” you spat at him as you pushed him back against the nearest locker.

Eddie let out as much of a groan as he could while the wind had been knocked out of him. He gave no effort to fight back as you stood there laughing as if seeing him like this was the funniest thing you’ve ever seen.

He looked to you to try and find any remorse as there had been no true meaning for this beat down, all he had done was attempt to ask you how your day had been.

This was a normal everyday occurrence for you two at this point, Eddie would try to muster up a greeting and you’d shut him down with some form of assault. But today you decided to have some fun with him.

“What freak, don’t want to ask about my day anymore, too scared now?” Eddie couldn’t form any words, he stuttered at every type of sentence he tried and all he could let out was “b-bitch”

You huffed at his response and throw your half eaten PB&J at him splattering it all across his hellfire club t-shirt. “I hope your stupid little club likes trash.” You finally walk away and go along normally as if you hadn’t just embarrassed the shit out of a man a foot taller than you.

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆

As you walk out to the parking lot, you see Eddie leaning against the side of his van smoking a cigarette. You’re surprised to see him alone and not bantering with his buddies. You internally fight yourself to go up to him, as he looks eerily attractive like this. You don’t understand why you would ever think that way about him. You hated him, you wanted him to hate you. He was a dick to you so you needed to return the favor. So why the hell are you swooning over him right now!

“Gonna stand there and stare at me all night?” You snap out of your trance as you hear his raspy voice. Gah why does his voice even give you butterflies.

He finally looks over to you to see if he missed a response from you. “Just trying to figure out why the freak is near my car” he scoffs at that comment as you’ve used freak as your main source of your punishment towards him.

“Are you not getting bored of using the same old comments” Eddie announced “Each time you talk to me you call me a freak, I think we can all understand that’s what I am to you by now.”

You begin to slowly walk up to the side of his van. “What do you want from me, I merely exist and you continuously terrorize me?” You stop in your tracks, you cannot believe what he’s just announced.

“Just exist? You’ve bullied me since the day we’ve met buddy!” Eddie whips his head towards you and gives you a sly grin. “Sweetheart you got it all wrong” he closes the gap between us. I didn’t realize how close I’d walked up to him until it only took him 2 steps to be face to face with me.

You couldn’t breath anymore. What is going on with you, you basically crumbling into the palm of his hand. You never do this. All of a sudden you are hit with the hard metal of the van on your back. Eddie had slammed you up against the van exactly like you had earlier today when you slammed him into the lockers.

“How do you like it princess?” You’re stuck in time,’princess,’ him basically breathing down your neck, his legs rubbing against yours, you couldn’t handle it.. all of a sudden there was a heat growing between your legs.

“E-Ed’s…” you let out as a whimper. You hoped for him to say something back.. but as soon at you said it he let go.

You stand there as he walked to the door of his van and hopped in. You begin walking away with your wobbly legs as you are still flustered from how close he was.

The only words you could even fathom in your head were “what the fuck just happened…well shit.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x fem!reader #bully Eddie #take what you get from me I don’t have time to write #eddie munson x reader #eddie is a sweetheart #I love Eddie #sorry i know it’s kinda awful but i don’t want it on my drafts anymore

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vashbug · 1 year

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Dropped into No Man’s Land Ch 2

Summary: Vash has a hard time trusting you. You tell him about Earth. You realize something important.

Notes: Chapter 2 of my silly Trigun Isekai fic. Okay, that's all I'm posting for today! I think two chapters is enough for now. I hope you enjoy :)

First Chapter: Here

Read on AO3: Here

***

You let out a nervous laugh as you watch Vash's face go from jovial, to curious, to suspicious in the span of a few seconds. He's taken a cautious step back, and suddenly you feel like he's looking at you as though he's calculating the trajectory of a bullet. Vash might be all too trusting, but he's not stupid, and you're an outlier in a world he knows almost everything about.

The moment drags on for a little too long, and you can see Vash's right hand twitch slightly at his side near his gun. You know he won't fatally harm you, but you sure don't want to get shot today. You make the mistake of sparing a quick glace at the holster strapped to his thigh, and it takes a millisecond for him to take that as a threat and draw, aiming directly between your eyes.

"Hey! Woah!" You put your hands up quickly. You know he's only doing this because he feels like you've deceived him, but the sight of his gun makes your blood run cold regardless.

"What are you," He asks, "and why are you here?" He's practically growling, and if you were watching him on TV, the tone in his voice would make you shiver. Instead, you feel like you might throw up.

"I'm human, I swear!" Your mind is struggling to process what is happening, and you're having a hard time finding the right words to defuse the situation. His glare is colder than you anticipated. "I told you the truth! I swear on my life."

Vash doesn't move a muscle as he stares you down. "Explain why you know who I am, then. I need to know if you're a threat to the people who live on this planet or not."

Ah, that's what this is. He couldn't give a shit whether or not you were here for him, he just wants to make sure you won't hurt anyone. Your mind clears somewhat and you're able to speak.

"Oh," you chuckle nervously. There's no point in hiding it now, whether he thinks you're insane or not. It's better than having him shoot you. "You're sort of... famous. In my time."

For the first time in a minute he moves, slightly lowering his gun. He looks surprised. "What?"

"Theres..." You need to phrase this in a way that makes sense, and in a way that doesn't make you so embarrassed that you beg him to shoot you. "There's a book about you. Where you're the main character. It's a... western, about a gunslinger named Vash The Stampede. He wears a red coat and travels from town to town helping people. Or trying to," you smile sheepishly.

He takes a moment to think this information over. "So in your... reality or whatever, there's a book about me? That you've read?"

"Yeah, I mean, it doesn't seem like it's entirely out there that at some point our realities have crossed, given that I'm here." You feel a lot more confident now that his gun isn't pointed directly between your eyes. "Maybe the author dreamed about you or something."

"How much does it say about me?" His curiosity is obvious now, though he's still trying to mask it with suspicion. His gun is lowered all the way down now, still in his hand.

"Oh, well, it... It says enough about you that I know who you are, but you seem a little different from the Vash in the book." He seems exactly like the Vash you know, but you're trying to save face a little, in case you get any details wrong.

"Okay..." He doesn't seem entirely convinced. "Then tell me something no one else knows about me."

This takes you by surprise. You didn't expect a quiz. You have to think for a moment. "Um, I know that Rem grew red geraniums."

He looks surprised again. "That's... That's not good enough. There are plenty of people who know that." His face says he's expecting another answer.

You feel sick to your stomach. You look him directly in the eye, so he knows that you're serious. You know what you have to say, but you desperately don't want to open old wounds.

"You saw something terrible; something when you were young, back on your ship." You eye him cautiously, careful with your words. "After you saw that, Knives was asleep, and Rem told you about the train, and the ticket..." You stop, sure this is enough. You don't dare to elaborate further.

It's Vash's turn to look sick. He carefully places his gun back in it's holster and sits heavily on the ground, his head dropped between his knees. "There's only a couple people that know that," he mutters.

Your heart aches for him, but at the same time you feel relief flood through you. You slump back and sigh. He raises his head and gives you an apologetic look. "Sorry, this is just so weird. When I realized you knew me, I was worried you were an alien... here to threaten humanity... or something." He looks ashamed, his cheeks red with embarrassment. It's obvious in the way his shoulders hunch forward that he feels bad about threatening you. "If it makes you feel any better," he pulls his gun back out and releases the cylinder with a click, showing you the inside. "I'm out of bullets."

You glance between him and his empty gun with your mouth open, not sure of what to say. Then you laugh-- a real laugh--and the sound makes his face brighten. "Damn it... you really are him."

He laughs as well, and for the first time since you've met you're both smiling at each other. He takes this as forgiveness and snaps his gun shut again, hiding it away once again. The two of you sit quietly for a while, watching the fire flicker in the dark, trying to process everything.

"So..." You look up at the sound of his voice and find him tracing circles in the sand with his prosthetic hand. He looks like a little kid about to ask their parents for something they're not supposed to have. "In this book... what other things do you know?"

"I'm not sure if I should tell you," you say, trying to sound playful. Truthfully, you were worried about this. Would telling him too much alter the timeline? Was it even the same timeline?

"Please! Just a little!" He half-walks on his knees over to your side, lacing his hands together and giving you the biggest puppy-dog eyes he can manage. His big blue eyes sparkle with anticipation. "I just want to know a little, you don't have to tell me anything life-altering; nothing about the future."

You fold immediately. Damn it. "Okay, I'll tell you. But only the light stuff! I don't even know if this is the same timeline I know." He sits upright, legs crossed like a child ready for story-time.

So you tell him about his friends, mostly, steering clear of any major events. He knows Wolfwood, Meryl and Roberto already, but the timeline diverges slightly and he ends up separated from them, with plans to meet with them again after Vash makes a few stops. You don't have time to ask him for details, as he's playing 20 questions with you at break-neck speed. After a while you run out of things to tell him about, and he begins to ask about your timeline and your Earth.

"What's it really like there?" His eyes are wide, and he leans closer and closer with each answer you give him. "Is flora really everywhere? Do you really watch movies? And just how many people are in your town?" He hangs on every word you say, and the fire begins to die from neglect.

"Well, flora really is sort of everywhere, except for in the desert, but even then there's specific vegetation there." You're careful not to use the word plant in this context. "And I do watch movies... And..." You have to think for a moment. "There are about 9 million people in my city? It's one of the biggest." You have to guess the population size.

His already wide eyes grow even wider. "9 million... In just one city." He thinks about it for a moment, and then his tone turns quiet and serious. "Is it... peaceful?"

You know the answer he is hoping for by the look on his face.

Your heart throbs painfully in your chest. "Well..." You look down at your hands. "It's more peaceful than here." You give him a weak smile, and you know it's not convincing. "It's not the same as here, really. I mean, I don't think you can even compare the two. People have more peaceful days than not, depending on where you live, I guess." You quickly realize you're not cut out for this conversation; you're not sure how to explain that there are so many contradictions in your life on Earth.

You look at his face in the dying firelight. For the first time since meeting him here, you see that familiar look, the one that exposes just how old and tired he truly is. You're not sure if he's disappointed with your answer, and you don't have the heart to ask.

"But," you continue, reaching over and taking his hand in yours. You figure you know him well enough to do this much. "People are mostly good. And we all help each other when we can. There are so many people from my Earth that are trying to make it a better place. I forget sometimes, that the Earth is a good place. It is... It's beautiful." You smile at him, this time genuinely. One of your hands holds his right, the other tracing circles into his palm. You notice that his hands are bigger than yours.

His eyes search your face, and while his expression is still worn-down, something else is there. Surprise? Curiosity? You can't place the feeling.

"Rem would have really liked you," he says quietly, looking down at his hand in yours. "I'm sure I don't have to tell you, but she wanted the world to be a better place. She wanted everyone to get along, just like that." His voice hitches slightly in his throat.

You're surprised at the mention of Rem, and suddenly you're keenly aware of your hands, your finger tracing it's slow circles over his gloved palm. You know it's a huge compliment--an honor, really--to be compared to Rem. Your face turns hot, and you can hear your own heartbeat in your ears. You can feel him looking at you, but you can't meet his eyes. You have to change the subject.

"The fire..." You glance at the dying coals. "We should probably keep it going, it's getting cold." You pull your hands away so you can wrap them around yourself.

"Ah!" Vash looks as though something in him has snapped back into place as he makes a show of fussing over the fire. He seems like his usual, cheerful self as he pushes sticks and kindling into place. The fire comes back to life, and you're both bathed in the warm glow.

"Thank you," he says into the fire after a while. "For telling me about Earth. I hope you get back there someday. It sounds like a wonderful place." He turns his head to look at you as he says this, a smile that reaches his eyes spreading across his face.

He is so sincere it makes you want to cry again. You're not sure if you want to curl up in his jacket or curl up in his arms. He's still smiling at you, and you're sure he knows exactly what effect he has on people. Several thoughts cross your mind, all of them having to do with touching him or kissing him, and you have to fight to hold down your embarrassment. You decide it would be best not to act on any of them, though he's still looking at you, and he's so close...

Instead, you pick up your cracked phone and look at it once more, Idly turning it over in your hands. You concentrate on picking the sand out of the crevices, trying not to think about Vash. You look at the cracks in the screen, thinking it would probably still work if you could get it to turn on. You know you won't get a signal, but you'd at least have whatever is saved on it...

You exclaim so loudly Vash nearly falls into the fire.

"Ah! What that hell? What is it?"

You ignore him as he watches you scramble on all fours behind him, reaching for your bag. "My laptop!" You pull it out of your bag and brush the sand off of it, frantically opening it and pressing the power button. "Come on..." You plead. Please turn on.

Vash moves to sit behind you so he can look over your shoulder, obviously curious about your strange tech. His proximity is dangerous, with his chest practically pressing into your shoulder, but you don't have time to think about that.

You have to contain a shout when the screen blinks on. You can't believe it. It's working. You sort through your files and find that everything is unchanged, and this fact brings a small comfort to you. A piece of home.

But more importantly, you're looking for something. You search your downloads folder for the file. Vash watches you without making a sound; his gaze could drill a hole through your face and hands.

And there it is. Thank god for poor reception on the subway! If you really want to read something on the way home, you have to download it and send it to your phone so the poor cell reception doesn't prevent the next chapter from loading.

The fic your friend sent you, the one you didn't finish, sits in your downloads. The absurdity of it makes you laugh and nearly tear your hair out. Vash looks at you, concern and confusion written across his face.

You scan through the pages you've already read, heart thrumming in your chest.

Your hunch was correct. The events of this world, the one you've fallen into, aren't following the plot of the original. No, they're following this specific story. Vash separating from his friends, on his way to Octovern to buy gun parts; it can't be a coincidence. You've fallen into the story you were reading when the car hit you, right where you left off.

If you can't get back home, you'll need a way to protect yourself.

It doesn't seem like much, but with your combined knowledge of the original story, this is the closest thing to a weapon you have here. You might as well be able to tell the future.

This is it. This is how you'll survive.

#trigun #trigun stampede #trigun fic #trigun fanfiction #vash the stampede #vash x you #vash x reader #vash fanfic #this is so silly #i'm having such a good time writing it though #i love isekai

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