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dollypopup · 20 days

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I've been seeing so many bad faith takes from people who just. . .don't understand these characters or their love story, so here I am, taking them 1 by 1 lol

Let's start with potentially the lowest bar for Penelope

"I was rooting for Debling for Penelope!" aka: I didn't want Colin and Penelope to have their love story

Most of the justifications of this perspective come from the idea that an absent husband who leaves you lots of money and space for your hobbies is an ideal prospect. And you know what? You're right! For MOST women of the ton, this is an incredibly appealing proposition! That's why Cressida finds it so enticing. She wants what he can offer, a life away from her family (this is something she and Penelope have in common), a comfortable life in which she is alright with a lack of affection. I would argue most women on the marriage market during this time would agree. Marriage is a business transaction more than a fairy tale for them, for most women of this time, of the ton.

But Penelope is not most women of the ton. This perspective comes from a fundamental misunderstanding of her character. Her seeing marriage as a business transaction is her giving up on her dreams of being loved. People just assume that Penelope's greatest desire in life is to write Lady Whistledown, when this is absolutely not true. I even saw someone say that 'Penelope found her purpose'. But we know this is false

Because she says it herself. In Season 2, right after Colin talks to Marina and she calls him a boy caught up in his fantasies, the conversation is contrasted with Penelope, who tells him it's important to have dreams and fantasies, to be fanciful. And this *connects them*. It is the first truly open conversation we see between the two of them, and when he asks if she's found her purpose, she explicitly informs us what it is: Something that encourages her to be brave, and witty. Something that takes her far away from the watchful eyes of her Mama. Something that fulfills her.

Lady Whistledown is not any of those things. Lady Whistledown, sure, encourages her to be witty, but also encourages her to be cruel, to make painful decisions. Lady Whistledown does not encourage her to be brave, in fact, it only exists through her hiding and secrecy. And it keeps her beneath her Mama's thumb, as she is literally tied to the ton and it's going ons by writing it. No, Lady Whistledown is not her purpose. Writing is her passion, and I do argue that writing is ONE part of her purpose, absolutely!

But. . .what else?

Well. . . .love. Love and connection. *Love* is what inspires Penelope to be brave, Love and comfort with Colin encourages her wittiness, and Love is what will provide her an avenue for leaving her mum. Love is Penelope's greatest dream and desire. And I am NOT just talking romantic love here, but love of all sorts. Philautia (self love), Pragma (love of duty), Ludus (playful love), Agape (universal love), Storge (familial love), Philia (friendship), and, of course, Eros (romantic and sexual). Love with Eloise, Love in her family, Love and Respect in her community, and Love that is romantic and sexual in nature. Love with Colin.

But what Debling offers her is only one of those. He can only offer her a love of duty, respect in her community with a title, a pragmatic marriage with no passion, one in which she is expected to wait for him with fidelity as he lives his own passions, and she occupies herself with her own interests (so long as, very importantly, those interests do not make a fool of him, since he did, after all, dump her when he assumed she'd cheat on him when he was away) (cue me: 'is this your king????'-ing @ you all). I am flabbergasted that people would think Penelope would find happiness being alone and writing Whistledown as a married woman. . .when she did not find happiness being alone and writing Whistledown as a single woman. All that would change is her title, and that's not enough. She deserves better. She deserves more. She wants more.

When she asks him 'Could you ever love me?' he responds with several long excuses that amount to: No. No, he could never love her. He is too tied to his work, he does not know her. He has been talking to her for a week and had maybe what? 5 conversations with her about it? 1 of which was comparing her to a dead deer mounted on a wall (and I'll try not to read too much into the metaphor of Women shedding their names, a death of their old selves in their society, to become a literal trophy holed up in a rich man's house) and another was in which she insisted she. . .loved grass? Come on, people. Have a higher bar for this character you claim to like so much.

Another conversation they share is very telling, in which he asks about her hobbies. She informs she enjoys reading, and he finds it quaint, charming that she enjoys romances. But he does not find that in any way comparable to his own work. Debling respects Penelope as most men in his society respect women: as a pretty bauble with which to decorate his life. Not an equal. He is glad she has a quiet interest that will keep her where he feels she belongs: in his home, tending to his fortune and assets. He explicitly states he doesn't want a partner who shares his passions, who enjoys the outdoors, but simply an honest woman who will tend to his lair estate.

What Debling offers her is a life of pragmatism and expectancy, and in many ways, loneliness. Penelope would surely cultivate friendships in this time, but in accepting his offer, she even says she has 'come to terms' with what he can provide for her. Not that she is happy, not that it is what she *wants*, but that she has come to terms with it. That she will be content. She will fill her days with love stories she will never live, and write about the day to day of a ton that does not accept her. Maybe, just maybe, she can even have a family, and she, like her mother, like Marina, like other tragic women in her society, will find happiness in her children, and not in her own life.

But why should she? Penelope? Penelope wants love. Penelope wants acceptance and tenderness and passion, and that's why I am confident in saying that Penelope has not, in fact, given up on Colin. Not her love for him, at least. Her love for him has not faded, remains evergreen: we see it when she reads his journal, when she stands in the sun after their reconciliation and feels at peace for the first time in the season, when she laughs at his jokes, when she asks him to kiss her. She has given up on one thing only: her expectation of him fulfilling that love. And that's what makes it so heartbreaking that they're both pining for each other, thinking the other does not feel the same. Because Penelope knows (and she is RIGHT) that her and Colin have something special.

This is heart vs. head, and honestly, not even Penelope's head wants Debling.

The people who say they were hoping he and Penelope would end up together, y'all are Portia. Your expectations for Penelope are that she should be happy with money and a title and an absent partner. And then, the quiet part is 'She shouldn't be holding out for love'. She shouldn't be holding out for dreams.

But. . .why not? Colin is in every single way an amazing person for her. And he's proof that she should have held out, that waiting was worth it. That it had always been worth it.

Because it is *Colin* who is the gateway to all those forms of love.

Pragmatically, Colin has money a-plenty. He's in good standing in his society, he's rich, he's attractive, and he comes from a wonderful family. Furthermore, even from season ONE Daphne said that Colin can make an interaction interesting. He makes Penelope laugh, he's a good dancer, he's adventurous and loves to travel. And most importantly, he'd love to travel WITH her. Whilst Debling is attempting to narrow her world, Colin, in contrast, wants to open it to her.

Since her and Colin met as children, much of the start of their love story for him was first universal, and then familial in nature. When first her bonnet flew into his face and he fell, he had no reason to be kind about it, but he was. He has a kind nature. But then as they became acquainted, and she had a connection to Eloise, it morphed from his universal love and good will towards strangers, to that of a family friend. The comment that he sees her as one of his sisters was harsh, but it's also not BAD that this is a kernel of their love story. It bred familiarity with them, and lead into a genuine friendship. And my god, I could talk about their friendship for days.

Colin has been an amazing friend to Penelope. He checks in on her, he writers her letters, he asks how she's doing, he offers her his hand to lift her up, he refuses to let her speak badly of herself, he's protective of her, he finds her funny, he seeks her out because he values her perspective. Colin adores Penelope, and the last two seasons have proven it in so many ways. Even in his pursuit to help her find a husband, this is a selflessness he offers because he cares for her. His goal is not to curry favor with her, his goal is only to uplift her. He only wants to see her happy. He holds her in the highest esteem and sees her in such a beautiful light. And that leads into her self love, because what Colin said to Penelope in Season 2 Surely if Penelope can see me this way, surely I can as well-- that rings true for Penelope, as well. Colin loves her so dearly and sees her with such grace, that she is then inspired to bring that inwardly.

Debling is the death of her dreams, and Colin is her dream in fruition.

But it is also risky, and it is also, in some ways, foolish. He's not a sure choice for her, but he's the BEST choice. He represents passion and tenderness, he is the love story of all her books and fantasies. Because what Marina said to Colin, that he is caught up in his fantasies: Penelope is, too. That's what makes them such a good match. And so with him, she blooms. With him, she feels brave, and is witty, and will come out from her Mama's thumb and her expectations. And what's left after Pragma and Agape and Ludus and Storge and Philia?

Well. . .. It's Psyche and Eros, isn't it?

So, at the end of it, at the 11th hour, when Colin comes to her and he is honest, and he is vulnerable, and he doesn't know she feels this love for him and has for so long, and he spills open for her, Penelope knows she doesn't have to simply be content.

She knows she can be happy. Fuck your low expectations, she *can* and *should* have a love story.

And the one she lives with Colin is such damn good one.

#polin #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #god i love polin so much y'all do not even understand #me???? writing meta at 8 in the morning??? lol #new season same dolly #anti debling #lord debling #the way so many people just. . .miss the point #this one is my defending penelope post #be on the lookout for defending colin because god the way some of y'all misread my man. . .you do not deserve him

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microclown · 10 months

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Crowley and Aziraphale's communication in the final 15 is bad, but going back through the season I've realized it's even more prevalent than I thought…

not all of these miscommunications are a problem, but they barely have one interaction that doesn't include some form of lack of communication, so I thought it was worth highlighting the pattern

List under the cut, analysis at the end

Aziraphale doesn't tell Crowley about the naked man, Nina does

Aziraphale doesn't tell him it's Gabriel, he tell him it's Jim, Crowley sees it's Gabriel

"I feel like your exactly and my exactly are different exactlys" (aka miscommunication- assuming they're on the same page when they're not)

Cowley doesn't tell Aziraphale the stakes, that he could be erased from the book of life for helping Gabriel

The Apology dance is literally dancing around the issue. He doesn't want to apologize because he doesn't believe he is in the wrong, but they never talk through it, they just move forward

"Ah, we're going to the pub!" As they're walking in the door. so Aziraphale didn't tell him where they were going, he just lead him there??

Aziraphale and Crowley don't agree on how to get Nina and Maggie together, but they go ahead and execute their own plans without discussing it further. Crowley does ask "I'm lost, am I doing a rainstorm?" but Aziraphale has already moved on and doesn't answer him. He's already decided the ball is the better option, but he doesn't communicate that. Later, Crowley tries to tell Aziraphale about his plan with the rainstorm, but Aziraphale ignores him. "You don't want to hear about my plan?" Then when Crowley tells him the rainstorm plan was a bust, Aziraphale has no idea what he's talking about.

After telling Crowley about the Clue, Aziraphle doesn't let them discuss it at all. He literally cuts Crowley off from asking any questions about it "no! not another word."

When Aziraphale asks to take the Bentley, he doesn't really ask, he's telling Crowley he's going to take it. Crowley says no indirectly "You can't drive my Bentley." Aziraphale explains that he can drive because he has a license. So Crowley says "No" plainly. Aziraphale ignores him. Crowley says "No" again, louder, clearer, slaps Aziraphale's hand away, but Aziraphale still ignores him.

When Aziraphale tells Crowley what he learned about Gabriel in Edinburgh, they never discuss it fully because Crowley cuts him off to execute his rainstorm that they've also never fully discussed.

Neither Aziraphale or Crowley tell the other that Shax confronted them. More importantly, Aziraphale doesn't tell Crowley that Shax tricked him into revealing that Gabriel is in the bookshop.

Aziraphale is very coy with Crowley while planning the ball "wait and see!" He never actually tells Crowley his plan.

When Aziraphale suggests "just talking" to Gabriel, he looks pleased when Crowley says "Actually, I will." He doesn't seems to read Crowley's tone. Crowley then proceeded to yell at Gabriel and tells him to jump out a window. Probably not what Aziraphale had in mind.

Of course, the whole scene in the ball. Crowley doesn't tell Aziraphale about the demons straight away, he leads with a seemingly less urgent "somethings wrong". Aziraphale is barely listening anyway. He's too in his own world, too caught up in psyching himself up to ask Crowley to dance.

After the demons storm the ball, Aziraphale tells Crowley he's got a suggestion, but Crowley cuts him off "I've got it."

Crowley doesn't tell Aziraphale what he learned in Heaven. He doesn't tell him about Armageddon part 2, or that Gabriel was fired for not wanting to go ahead with it. He doesn't even tell him this during their big fight at the end, when you would think it would be a convincing point towards Aziraphel staying.

Neil has revealed that Crowley never told Aziraphale that he was living in his car

And then their final argument is laden with miscommunication, (people have gone into great depths analyzing this already, but I’ll just sum it up so it’s included) - Aziraphale assumes Crowley would want to be an angel again, but they’ve clearly never discussed this. Crowley assumes Aziraphale is on the same page with why heaven is so bad, but they’ve clearly not fully discussed this either. Crowley can barely look at Aziraphale when he’s confessing. He can’t get out the word “partner.” He can’t finish his sentence “I would like to spend…” Then there’s “nothing lasts forever” which Crowley interprets entirely differently from Aziraphale’s intention. “I don’t think you understand what I’m offering you” “I understand, and I think I understand a whole lot better than you.” And then, when Crowley has given up on trying to communicate verbally, he kisses Aziraphale as a last “Hail Mary” to get him to understand. But of course he doesn’t. That’s not communication.

So.

If you’re still with me, what’s the point of laying all this out? Well, a couple of things. I’ll try to organize my thoughts coherently.

Crowley and Aziraphale’s communication is beyond a simple fix

It is so much worse than I originally thought. What they need is couples therapy. They both need to become aware of the broken way they relate to each other, and they need to do a lot of work on listening to each other, giving each other space to talk, and being honest with what they know and how they are feeling. We needed someone to call them out, make them aware of this, but Nina and Maggie TRIED this season, and it was not enough. Unfortunately, I’m fairly confident season 3 will not just be six hour long couples therapy sessions. I’m not sure how much room for working on communication skills there will be at all. Neil has described season three as big, loud, and action packed. I have no idea how this issue will be resolved in that context.

Something horrible I realized when making this list. Crowley’s relationship with Aziraphale is beginning to mirror his toxic relationship with heaven. Aziraphale develops a plan- taking care of Gabriel, investigating the clue, organizing the ball. He wants things to go just the way he has in mind. He does not let Crowley say no. He does not let Crowley ask questions!!! And now Aziraphale is running heaven? What makes us think he would treat Crowley any differently in a real position of power? It would have been so. bad. if Crowley accepted Aziraphale’s offer. Yes, Aziraphale and Crowley are on the same page on preserving the world and humanity, and yes they love each other and want to be with each other, but when it comes to what to do about it, they don’t see eye to eye. And neither of them know how to properly collaborate or communicate.

Finally, why do Aziraphale and Crowleyhide things from one another? Simply, they don’t really trust each other. I mean they do, sort of, but not entirely. They have a deeper trust. They trust that the other cares about them, and won't harm them intentionally, but they have so many deep rooted issues with trust from their past with heaven and hell that it overflows into their relationship. People have said Crowley keeps information from Aziraphale to protect him, but that also comes from a place of mistrust. He doesn’t trust Aziraphale to protect himself. He doesn’t trust him to do what he would do with that information. Similarly, Aziraphale doesn’t trust Crowley to let him do things his way. They don’t know how to collaborate! Not really. It's something they want, but were never taught. Collaboration was never encouraged in Heaven or hell.

#not sure I believe in the final point anymore #I think their motivation for lying can be summed up to Crowley is being protective and Aziraphale is in denial #reposting because I needed to make some edits #this is mostly to organize my thougts #I might make some separate posts later #good omens #ineffable husbands #aziraphale x crowley #crowley #aziraphale #crowley x arizaphale #good omens season 2 #good omens 2 #go 2 #gos2 #neil gaiman #good omens analysis #good omens meta

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atlabeth · 2 months

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everything happens for a reason part 22 - zuko x fem!reader

I've been waiting on you

part 21 | masterlist | part 23

a/n: UHHH happy one year anniversary of me not updating!! i missed it by a day but honestly that's very in character. i kind of have no excuse for taking a year long break from this. lol. all i can really say is i lost all my avatar inspo and got really into a bunch of other things and poor little ehfar got left in the corner abandoned!!! but i could never abandon this it's my baby and even if it takes me 1000 years to finish it i will finish it. it's kind of embarrassing that it took so long for this to come out and it's a short filler chapter like who do i think i am.... but everyone is happy and on the beach and yn finally gets some clothes of her own after spending like 7 chapters in prison clothes. anyways enjoy (three more chapters left what?? will it take me 3 years who knows)

wc: 4.8k

warning(s): yn and zuko talk about their pasts and what theyve been through but overall this is a very fluffy chapter

chapter title from seasons (waiting on you) by future islands

The days after their arrival back to the island passed by with relative ease.

Y/N practiced waterbending with Katara and Aang so she could work on getting the hang of it again. She’d been close to mastery before Ba Sing Se, and her muscle memory was stronger than she realized, but prison and the months without her bending had weakened her. Zuko continued working with Aang on his firebending under the looming deadline of the comet.

Sokka and Suki trained with each other too, working on their hand to hand and sword fighting, and Y/N would occasionally join in to stay sharp on what Suki had taught her back in prison. Her time without her bending made her realize how much she relied solely on it, and she never wanted to feel defenseless again.

They continued to share stories every night over a campfire. They all had plenty to talk about after everything they’d been through, especially when Zuko had been against them for half the time, Suki was leading the Kyoshi Warriors, and Y/N was stuck behind bars.

And of course, Zuko and Y/N spent as much time together as they possibly could. They were practically attached at the hip—sitting together at meals, watching one another bend on their breaks, training against each other the way they used to, exploring the island together, just being with each other. After everything they’d been through, Y/N thought they deserved it.

Eventually though, it was decided that they had to leave. Being in Fire Nation territory, even in the middle of nowhere, was risky. They were running out of food and supplies in general, and the possibility that Fire Nation ships would still somehow discover them weighed on their minds. They couldn’t afford to get caught so far into their mission, especially with the traitor prince of the Fire Nation on their side.

Zuko’s idea, however, was possibly even riskier.

“Ember Island?” Y/N asked hesitantly. “That’s… bold.”

“We’re already being bold by staying in Fire Nation territory,” Zuko said. “We’re safe from Azula for now, but it’s only a matter of time before she somehow finds us again.” He shrugged. “My family’s vacation home is the last spot anyone will think to look.”

“I think it’s a great idea,” Sokka said. “It’ll be nice to not fight for our lives for a minute before we make the final push.”

Aang adjusted his hold on the reins—they’d already packed up Appa and started flying before Zuko proposed his idea—and shrugged. “I’m okay with it. Zuko and I will be able to keep training, and you all can relax in an actual house.”

“And we’ll be able to go to the beach!” Toph exclaimed. “I’ve been meaning to work on my sandbending. And,” she grinned, “I’m betting none of you have heard of sandball fights.”

“We’re really getting ourselves into something,” Katara said dryly.

Y/N smiled and she leaned into Zuko’s side. He wrapped his arm around her immediately and pulled her closer.

“I’ve always wondered what Ember Island was like,” Y/N mused. “I was always so jealous when you and Azula got to go there on vacation every summer and I was stuck at the palace.”

“You weren’t missing much,” Zuko said wryly. “Yeah, there’s beaches, but mostly it was just unbearably hot.” He frowned. “My father still made me do work even when we were supposed to be on vacation. I’ve done a lot of swordfighting here.”

“I missed you,” she said, and she knew that she would never get tired of seeing Zuko’s cheeks flush red.

“Really?” he asked. “Even then?”

“Especially then,” she clarified. “It wasn’t like I had much going on for me there. The palace was extremely boring without you.”

“Spirits, you guys are gross,” Sokka groaned as he looked out at the sky. “Suki and I haven’t been like this, have we?”

Katara chuckled. “You definitely have. You could barely stay off of each other when you got back from the Boiling Rock.”

“Just imagine what they were like when they first got back together,” Zuko said with a frown.

“Neither of you can say anything,” Toph asserted. “I can hear both of your heartbeats shoot up every time you’re around Y/N and Suki.”

Zuko scowled, Sokka’s face flushed, and Suki and Y/N just smiled at each other.

“So Ember Island is a yes?” Aang asked. When everyone nodded in agreement, he looked at Zuko. “I’m in need of your navigation skills, Sifu Hotman.”

He groaned. “I told you to stop calling me that.”

“I know,” Aang said cheerfully.

Zuko just sighed, and he kissed Y/N on the cheek before he moved to sit next to Aang. She smiled, and she let her hand hang over the side of the saddle.

“...I guess it is nice not seeing you two argue all the time,” Sokka said after a moment.

“It’s nice that you two aren’t moping around all the time either,” Toph added. “That was kind of annoying.”

“Imagine how I felt,” Y/N said, though it was absent minded as her gaze stayed on Zuko.

“I don’t have to imagine it,” Toph said. “You were very clearly mopey.”

“And when you weren’t mopey, you were angry,” Suki contributed. “You said you were imagining Zuko’s face whenever I taught you new moves at the Boiling Rock. You beat him up a lot there.”

Sokka and Toph laughed, but it was a moment before she said anything. It took Katara saying her name for her to turn back around, and when Y/N did, she blinked for a moment. “What?”

Katara chuckled, glancing at Zuko before she looked back at her. “We’re just glad you’re back.”

Her expression instantly brightened as she smiled. “I’m glad to be back.”

It didn’t take long for them to arrive at Ember Island—and if it did, Y/N was far too busy conversing with her friends and watching Zuko for it to matter. She grimaced as she slid off of Appa, one hand taking Zuko’s and the other wiping a bead of sweat from her forehead.

“Spirits,” she mumbled, “I thought I was used to Fire Nation heat by now.”

“Me too,” Sokka groaned. “But this is already worse than all the other places we’ve been to.”

“Ember Island’s always been like this,” Zuko said. “The good news is that it’s Ember Island. There’s plenty of beaches—we’ve even got our own private one.”

“Good for practicing waterbending,” Katara said with a glance at Aang.

“Good for practicing all kinds of bending,” Zuko said. “You’re gonna need to practice your firebending every day if you want to stand a chance against my father. We’re running out of time and you’re nowhere close to being a master.”

Aang frowned. “Way to bring down the mood, Zuko.”

“I’m being realistic!” he defended. “You can’t just end one hundred years of war with some good luck and an optimistic mindset!”

Sokka shrugged. “It’s worked for us so far.”

Zuko opened his mouth to say something that would definitely cause an argument. Before he could, Y/N laughed, looping her arm through his and tugging him along.

“Come on,” she said. “Show us around.”

Zuko sighed, though his show of annoyance was negated as he pulled Y/N closer. “Fine. It is about time I’ve brought you here.”

“Ugh.” Toph kicked at the sand with her foot. “I think Zuko’s just brought us along on his couples vacation.”

“Oh, quiet,” she joked. “We’ve earned it.”

Toph stuck her tongue out. “Doesn’t mean we can’t complain about it.”

Y/N chuckled as they walked together, the rest of the group trailing behind them.

“Spirits, Zuko,” Sokka marveled when they stepped inside the house. “This is huge.”

“It is the summer home of the royal family,” he said dryly. “My father never settles for anything less than perfection. It also gave us more room to avoid each other when he was causing arguments.”

“I can’t imagine that happened a lot,” Katara said sarcastically.

“Never,” Zuko agreed with the same tone. “He almost burned down the place a few times.”

Aang frowned. “Sounds like a great guy.”

“I know you’re not a violence guy, but if there’s anyone you’d enjoy fighting, it’s my dad,” Zuko muttered.

“I’ll do it for the good of the world,” Aang said. “Not because I’ll enjoy it.”

Zuko grimaced and opened his mouth to say something, but Y/N interrupted once more before they could devolve into this conversation again.

“Like Sokka said, this place is huge.” She placed a hand on Zuko’s arm. “Will we have our own rooms?”

Zuko’s brows creased a bit, but he nodded after a moment. “Yeah. There should be enough for all of us.”

“Suki and I can share,” Sokka said, stretching his arms out casually to reach one around Suki. She laughed and leaned her head against his chest, and he looked far too pleased with himself. “Tryna make up for lost time, y’know?”

“Gross,” Toph scoffed. “I’ll take my own room, please.”

Aang glanced at Katara for a moment before he cleared his throat and nodded at Zuko. “Yeah. Me too.”

Katara was too busy looking at a mask sitting on a mantle. She picked it up and glanced back at Zuko. “What is this from?”

“One of my mother’s favorite plays,” he said. “She was an actress before she married my father, and every time we came here, we’d always go see some shows. They gave her the mask of the lead character after the end of one production a few years ago, as thanks for her patronage.”

“Oh, we should definitely go see a play while we’re here!” Y/N exclaimed. “I got my hands on some old play scripts when I was still working in the palace, and the other servants and I would spend hours reenacting our favorite parts.” She chuckled. “It would be nice to see actual actors do it.”

“We should be able to carve out some time for that,” Zuko said. “Between all the training, of course.”

“You are such a downer,” Aang groaned.

“I’m seeing the full picture!” he defended. “We’ve still got a lot of work to do—just because we’re at our vacation home doesn’t mean we’re on vacation.”

“After all this is over, we definitely deserve a vacation,” Sokka muttered. “Before all the rebuilding and restructuring and relegislating starts…” The smile fell from his face. “Wow. We’re never gonna get a vacation.”

“Oh, perk up, ponytail,” Toph said. “We’re going to end the endless war and defeat the undefeatable Fire Lord. If we want to take a vacation, no one can really stop us.”

The smile reappeared with surprising quickness. “That’s true!”

Zuko laughed softly. “Your rooms should be on the first floor. You can explore and divide the rooms yourselves. I,” he looked at Y/N, “want to show you something.”

She smiled as Zuko pulled her closer with an arm around her shoulder and made for the stairs, leaving a rapidly growing argument over room selection in their wake.

“Do you think they’ll have decided by the time we get back down?” Zuko asked.

Y/N shrugged. “This is the first time they’re sleeping in rooms instead of camping on the ground in… Spirits. Since Ba Sing Se, I think. I wouldn’t be surprised if they go at it all night.”

He chuckled as they stopped in front of a room, and Zuko pushed open the door so they could walk in together.

“This was my room whenever we came here,” he said. “I figured we could share it.”

“This is the height of luxury,” Y/N commented, stepping out of Zuko’s embrace to run her hand over the sheets. Her lips quirked into a smile. “I can’t believe you slept on a bed like this every night.”

“You’re telling me they don’t have this kind of stuff in the North?” Zuko asked wryly.

“No,” she chuckled, “definitely not. We were more focused on not freezing.”

“Well, we’re more focused on pointless displays of luxury,” he said, “so you’re not too far off.”

Zuko ignited the tip of his finger and began lighting candles around the room, and Y/N glanced at him with amusement as she sat down on the bed.

“Mood lighting,” he explained with the sliver of a smile. “I think we deserve some time alone after the past few days.”

She pressed a hand to her chest. “You know the way straight to my heart.”

Once he was done he sat down next to her, and Y/N intertwined their hands together and pulled him down so they were laying on their backs. She rested her head on Zuko’s chest and he moved his arm around her to keep her close, tracing lazy circles on her shoulder.

“Wonderful mattress,” she sighed. “So this was what you were up to while I was sewing clothes and doing endless loads of laundry.”

“I thought about you a lot more than you probably think,” Zuko said. She turned her head a bit to look at him, slightly surprised, and he shrugged. “Honestly? When we were kids, I thought about you pretty much constantly. My father always told me not to talk to servants, but I didn’t see you as anything other than my friend. You were… kind of my only normal friend.”

“Well, you were kind of my only friend, period. All the other servants were way older—they just felt like a different version of my mom.” Y/N’s gaze rose to the ceiling. “I wonder how they’re all doing.”

“They should be okay,” Zuko said. “No one really caused as much trouble as we did.”

Y/N laughed as her gaze flitted around the room, taking in all the details. A portrait of the royal family hung on the wall, while a much smaller, lone portrait of Zuko sat on a desk in the corner. He didn’t look very happy, but she couldn’t imagine sitting for that many paintings as a child was fun. What looked to be a half-finished message sat on the desk, the ends of the scroll rolling up and obscuring most of the inked letters. A neat stack of towels and blankets were on top of a clothing chest in the other corner, and she chuckled a bit. In her experience of doing his laundry in their youth, it seemed to be something he still hadn’t grown out of.

“I can practically see little Zuko running in here after a day at the beach,” she mused. “The ends of his clothes singed from fighting with Azula, his hair drenched from swimming, getting sand all over the sheets.”

“I wasn’t that messy of a child,” he complained. “I… I did come home with my clothes singed a couple times, though.”

She chuckled. “I know. My mother had to fix a lot of your outfits because of it.”

“It’s not my fault that ‘hide and blast’ was her idea of fun!” he defended.

“Hide and blast?”

“One person hides, the other person searches. By… blasting fire everywhere.” Zuko shook his head. “I don’t know all kids around the Fire Nation were as crazy as us or if Azula invented it herself.”

“...Yeah,” Y/N said with a slight laugh. “We definitely didn’t play that in my village.”

“Of course you didn’t,” he said. “None of you were firebenders.”

“I was the only waterbender in the village though,” she said. “There were a couple other earthbender kids, but it made me feel so special. We would always play together and try to mix our bending together.” A small yet wistful smile tugged at her lips. “That feels like forever ago, though.”

“I know what you mean,” Zuko murmured. “I was banished three years ago, but a lifetime has changed since then.”

“For the better?” Y/N murmured.

She could feel Zuko nod. “Definitely.”

Their door was then pushed open more, and Suki poked her head in through the gap. A grin appeared on her face at their closeness.

“I see the lovebirds are making themselves at home,” she mused.

Y/N laughed as she sat up, pulling Zuko with her. She smiled at the sight of his flushed cheeks. “We’re trying.”

“We believe in knocking here in the Fire Nation,” Zuko grumbled.

“The door was open,” Suki said cheerfully. “And I’d like to steal your girl for an afternoon outing.”

Her eyebrows shot up. “What for?”

“Well, I’d like to explore the island some, and I figure we’re the lowest profile out of our whole group,” she said. “We’ve also missed out on some shopping while we were stuck in prison—we’ve gotta get our hands on some Fire Nation clothes.”

Y/N’s eyes lit up. “That’s a great idea! Leya’s dress is beautiful, but Earth Kingdom clothing sticks out a bit more than I want.”

“And I’m in literal prison clothes,” Suki said. “The sooner we’re in red, the better.”

“That’s… probably smart,” Zuko amended. “There’s some gold pieces in my bag. It should be more than enough for both of you.”

“Are you sure?” Y/N frowned. “You don’t have to—”

“You think I didn’t take a bunch of money from the palace before I left?” Zuko asked wryly. “Don’t worry about it.”

Suki’s smile grew. “Just call it reparations.”

Zuko huffed a laugh, but Y/N cut him off as she pulled him in for a kiss.

“You’ll be alright while we’re gone?”

“Of course,” he said. “This is my home, after all. If anything, I should be asking you that.”

“I’ve got the leader of the Kyoshi Warriors with me,” Y/N said. “If anyone decides to mess with us, it’s going to be their problem—not ours.”

Suki laughed and gestured with her head, and Y/N stood up and started walking backwards. “I’ll see you later—try to have some fun here.”

“I don’t have fun,” he called out as she was walking out, and she just shook her head with a smile.

“You’re really dating a ball of sunshine there, aren’t you?” Suki joked.

Y/N bit back her growing smile. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

The rest of the day went by in a breeze.

Y/N and Suki spent a few hours in town, chatting and shopping and even doing some reconnaissance at the end, just to make sure they were truly undercover at the vacation home. Doing rookie spy work with a Kyoshi Warrior was surprisingly just as fun as the shopping part—and after what she and Zuko did to free her village, it was surprisingly easy.

The sun was still high in the sky when they got back, dressed head to toe in Fire Nation finery. Zuko and Aang were in the midst of training when the two of them went around back to find their friends, and when he saw Y/N, his fire died out and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

(“Yeah,” Zuko had stammered when she asked his opinion, “You look really good.”

“Thanks,” she said, and she felt the heat rush to her cheeks. “I feel pretty good.”

“Fire Nation clothes suit you,” he said, and he pulled her into a kiss. “It’s about time you’ve gotten some.”

“Technically, I wore them for a few months,” she said wryly. “Prison clothes and all.”

Zuko scoffed. “That doesn’t count.”

“And I wore them for most of my childhood,” she mused. “Servant clothes and all.”

“That counts even less!” he insisted.

“But thank you,” Y/N finally said with a smile. “I was hoping you would like them.”

It was an effort to bite back her joy every time Zuko would sneak a look at her while they continued their training.)

The rest of the day was just mostly spent getting used to everything. The last time the vacation home had been occupied was when Zuko, Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee visited, so a lot of adjustments needed to be made.

Katara insisted on washing all the sheets, and Y/N decided to join in because of her waterbending—Aang wanted to talk with Katara, Zuko wanted to be with Y/N, Toph wanted to ask him a bunch of questions about Ember Island, and Sokka didn’t want to be left out, so soon enough, the seven of them were all sitting on the steps of the house doing laundry and telling stories.

Soon enough, the sun had set and the house had been cleaned what felt like ten times over. Everyone had retired to their own devices except for Y/N and Zuko, who were walking along the shore arm in arm.

“I think I like beaches,” she mused. “The nearest ocean had no beach back home, and all we had in the North was ice. You Fire Nation folk are lucky.”

Zuko chuckled. “I don’t know if it’s luck. We’re just one big island with a lot of humidity.”

“Still,” she leaned her head on his shoulder, “it’s nice. We should visit here together once all this is over.”

“Of course,” he nodded. “I know I’m going to be the Fire Lord if all goes well, but there’s going to be a lot of diplomacy trips.” She felt his eyes on her. “You can join me on all of them.”

“Of course,” she repeated. “The Fire Lord’s Earth Kingdom-born, waterbending girlfriend will be so welcome.”

“If you’ve learned one thing through all of this, it should be that I don’t care what anyone thinks when it comes to you,” Zuko said. “I want you there with me. You want to be there with me. That’s reason enough.”

Y/N chuckled, and she ran her thumb over Zuko’s knuckles. His hands housed callouses, borne from hundreds of hours of explosive firebending and sword-fighting and years of life on the road. She always wondered how hands that treated her so softly, that revered her, were so capable of violence.

“I know there’s going to be a lot of expectations for us,” she said. “Especially once you take the throne. But I— I’d like to take things as slow as we can.”

“Of course.” Zuko squeezed her hand, his brows creasing. “I don’t care what anyone says or wants or expects. I love you, Y/N—we’ll go at our own pace.”

“It’s just because we’ve spent the past year trying to kill each other,” Y/N said with a nervous laugh. “If we could spend this next year being in love with each other, that would be really great.”

That actually got a laugh out of Zuko, and he gestured with his head towards the sand. When they sat down, he pulled her into his side. They fit perfectly together.

“Don’t worry,” he murmured. “I think we’ve already gotten a headstart on that.”

“Good,” she said.

Y/N sighed as she moved closer into Zuko’s embrace, his warmth a shield from the cool night breeze. She’d always run cold, and having a personal hearth made things much easier.

“I wish we didn’t have to go through so much to end up with each other,” she murmured.

“Believe me,” Zuko sighed, “I know.”

“But my mother always told me that everything happens for a reason,” Y/N said. “And… I guess she’s right. Because I don’t think we would be here if all this hadn’t happened.” Something inside of her twisted, and though she tried to suppress it, the words came out before she could really think about it. “And sometimes I— I wonder why I’m still here.”

He frowned slightly, allowing a short glance down at her. “What do you mean?”

“I mean… you know what I’ve had to go through to get here. My village, the palace, the North, this journey with Aang, the capital prison, the Boiling Rock…” she shook her head. “Countless others have died or gotten hurt trying to protect me or save me. Our group— we were the first ones ever to escape from the Boiling Rock. So why do I get to be here? Why is my father gone, but I’m still here? I don’t deserve it more than he did. I certainly don’t deserve it more than Yue. So… I don’t know. Sometimes I just can’t understand why I’m the one that got to make it when so many others haven’t.”

“Don’t say that,” Zuko urged.

“It’s not the way you think,” Y/N said honestly. “It just feels like we’ve beaten every single odd.”

“Maybe we have,” he said, “but it’s certainly not out of luck, or chance.” Zuko took her hand and intertwined their fingers together, giving her hand a squeeze. “You fought every step of the way to get here—a lot of the time, you were fighting against me. You’ve earned every good thing you’ve gotten, Y/N, and I think I might spend the rest of my life trying to be someone worthy of you.”

“Zuko,” she lamented, “you already are.”

“It’s not the way you think,” he echoed wryly. “I’ve loved you since the beginning, and despite everything, you still love me too. You kept giving me chances because you believed in me for some stupid reason. I wouldn’t be where I am without that—without you. I want to be the best version of myself every day so you know you made the right choice.”

Y/N felt the heat rush to her cheeks as she smiled, squeezing his hand back. Nowadays, they were almost always touching in some way. Tonight reminded her why—she never felt more comforted, more at peace, then when she was with Zuko.

“You… kind of just hit my next point,” she said with a nervous chuckle, curling into his side further.

“Don’t tell me it’s more self-doubt,” Zuko said.

“I can’t help it!” she defended. “I— I just have to make sure.”

“Of what?”

“That…” Y/N paused, her mouth suddenly dry. “That I’m still the one you want. Even after all that’s happened. After all that’s going to happen.”

Zuko frowned, and he took her other hand, lacing their fingers together. “Of course. Y/N, it’s always been you. It’s been true forever, even if I haven’t always known it.”

“It’s not going to be easy,” she said softly. “I’m Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom. Your people aren’t just going to accept that, especially with you as their leader.”

Zuko actually laughed at that, and he gave her a sideways smile. Months ago, staring into his hardened eyes used to bring her close to tears. Seeing him smile now, reassuring doubts that seemed so pointless in the face of his love—even after everything, Y/N considered herself the luckiest girl in the world.

“Y/N, we’ve gone across the whole world doing things no one ever has,” Zuko said. “The seven of us are going to end a war that’s been going on for a century. Aang is going to defeat my father, and he shouldn’t even be alive. We’ve beat every single odd against us. I think getting my people to like you will be the easiest thing we have to handle.”

“You think so?” she asked. The tension had dissolved some from her shoulders, her worries dissuading with each honeyed word.

“I know so,” Zuko assured. “I’m gonna have to change the Fire Nation from the ground up. There’s no one else I’d want by my side while I do it. My people will see you the way I do, and they’ll love you just as much.”

Y/N leaned closer and pressed a kiss to his lips. Sometimes she still couldn’t get over the fact that she could just… do that. Just kiss him, just smile with him, just be happy with him. Yue shone down on them as she pulled away, Zuko’s features glowing in the moonlight, and Y/N hoped her friend knew she was so much of the reason she’d gotten here.

Happiness seemed out of reach, out of her cards entirely, for such a long time, and when she had it, it always felt like such a precarious thing. Sometimes she still remembered those days in the tea shop, the night in the catacombs.

But with Zuko finally by her side, it was a tangible thing. Something she deserved. Something she already had.

“We’ll do it all together,” she murmured.

“Together,” Zuko agreed.

And she laid back down on the sand, bringing Zuko with her. He pulled her closer, tucked into his side as he wrapped his arm around her. They laid there in silence, Zuko’s warmth heating her from the inside out, staring up at the starry night sky and reveling in the feeling of just being with each other.

Together.

i'll tag ppl here because it's been uhhhhhh fucking YEAR and everyone's prob forgotten it exists and i also did tag lists while this was coming out but please do not ask to be added bc i dont do them anymore!!

ehfar tags: @chandies-sideblog @zacatecanaaaa @anzanity @randomthingssssss @escapingthoughtsandsecrets @shanksfav @shephard17895 @ilovespideyyy @whats-my-question @selfship-mishaps @ilistentotayswifttocope @i-make-questionable-choices @3leni @thatobsessedreader @lostgreekgod @oriontingz @zerode-unhinged @badpvn @mimi-sanisanidiot @adhdhufflepuff @aquaamethyst96 @hollyismentallyillhelp @holypoetrygarden @islandgayneery @pitrii-petra @jinxed-jk @veras-fanfic-reblogs @cloud-9ine @lucifersidepiece @kiskzawagnerwhore @froggi-00 @eajalova @mrsyixingunicorn10 @xxxxxxdelenaxxxxxx @cafesho @the-natureofme @whoevenfrickinknows @a-bit-late @zukowantshishonourback @settlebackeasy @jemssafespace @wildwallflower24 @calmoistorm @mich1551-blog @inutheangel @sagemastah @avrilh

#zuko x reader #zuko x you #zuko x reader fic #zuko #zuko fic #avatar #avatar the last airbender #atla #avatar fic #atla fic #avatar the last airbender fic #atla x reader #avatar x reader #sadie writes #ehfar

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buckttommy · 30 days

Text

7b theories.

god this was emotionally exhausting.

Okay I'm going to break this up into two parts: Part One (Bobby and Athena), Part Two (Buck and Eddie)

Part 1 (Bobby and Athena)

Bobby's had an axe hanging over his head all season. I was too caught up in the BuckTommy euphoria to notice it. But rewatching the cruise ship arc in light of the final episode titles being revealed—especially the scene where Bobby and Athena think they're about to die in 7x02 with the flashbacks to his (and Athena's) time in therapy—it's just like...

Season 1 beginning with Bobby's need to atone for the lives lost in the apartment fire.

Bobby's arc beginning (?) in Season 7, "Ghost of a Second Chance" and carrying through to the rest of the season, including Step Nine (which, in AA, is the step about making amends for harm done)

Bobby telling Frank he proposed to Athena after recently moving to Minnesota after suffering a "loss" (he doesn't expand on it; great job being honest with your therapist, Bob)

"Athena. I am so sorry." "You have nothing to apologize for." "You didn't want to come on this damn cruise. I made you. What the hell was I thinking to deserve a second chance like this?"

Athena saying she was worried she didn't know how to be with Bobby and who they were without the "noise" of their lives.

Athena saying she has "lots to say but not enough time" and we haven't circled back to that.

Bobby's big rescue in 7x03, how he was fully in Fireman Mode, which was awesome but it also showed how capable he is, how much he fucking loves and is good at this.

"I wish Buck could have seen you do that." "Honestly? I would've much rather seen Buck do that" > Bobby feeling the age of the job on his body but still enjoying it. Knowing he's getting older but not wanting to be pulled away from it involuntarily necessarily

Season 4 Redux, yes, but one of the core facets of Season 4 was Bobby and Athena's conversation surrounding retirement as the result of (Athena's) on the job injury...

Hen being the go-to interim Captain when Bobby is absent/out-of-commission for whatever reason + Bobby referring to her as "Captain."

All of Hen's big stories always seem to center around either her family or her career. She just recently fostered a little girl, which means that any advancements to her story are going to be with her career. If Bobby is out of commission, perhaps permanently, Hen is looking at a promotion.

Bobby saying the only difference between him and the drunk driver from the pileup in Season 4 is "one bad day."

So my theory, now that I've moved past the hysteria of Bobby potentially dying, is:

Bobby saves either the members of the 118 (his family) from a fire + severe peril OR he saves the man from his past (whose loved ones died in the apartment fire, and who was unwilling to forgive Bobby previously) → In doing so, he injures himself → Season 7 ends on a cliffhanger with the audience thinking Bobby is dead → Major Character Injury forces Bobby to retire → Season 8, Bobby and Athena really have to sit with who they are outside of the "noise" of their lives once that noise has been reduced and no longer has any hope of being turned back up → Hen becomes Captain → Tommy/Ravi/someone else fills her spot → Paramedic Buck? (He has no interest in leaving the 118, but twice in two seasons, the idea of Buck changning his position within the 118 has been floated. Seems like a career switch is on the horizon)

#fu cking christ.#i need to go to bed.#jack.txt #tv: 911 #7b speculation #8a speculation #8b speculation

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fiyaa-xoxo · 4 months

Text

Its cold outside, but when i'm in your arms the icy cold just melts away~

Ace trappola

✧˚ · .Winter season is upon the land of Twisted wonderland.The freezing weather causing people to bundle up into their warmest attire. But with the winter season you know what else is there? Why Winter break of course! Many students are in their dorm rooms excitedly packing to go back home and enjoy the holidays with their loved ones. All but one student is.....

✧˚ · . "Arn't you gonna start packing yet Ace?" Deuce asked.

✧˚ · ."Nah, i'm staying at school, the family isn't home so i guess just stay at school. Plus if i did stay with my family their gonna nag me none stop. Its a pain in the ass man"

✧˚ · ."Well alright, i personally am excited to see my mom again" "I know, mama's boy~" Ace teased "Am Not!" yelled Deuce" by that time Ace already left their dorm room chuckling while walking to the mirror to lead him back to campus. As he entered then excited the mirror a cold breeze hit him as he shivered. "Jeez this weather is worst than last year" he thought. He walked around campus weirded out by how quiet it is. At this point most of the students are already in the mirror room leaving campus, or others are still packing in their dorms. Regardless of that it felt a bit weird... but also calming. Ace watched as the snowflakes fell and covered everything like a blanket. But something caught his eye, or maybe... someone.

✧˚ · .Ace walked up behind a tree to watch as two people er- one person and one cat play in the snow. "Hey y/n if your going to force me here i'm going to freeze my tail off!!!" Ace chuckled behind the tree as he watched. "Oh grim don't be such a prick, yeah its cold but at least its not burning hot right" y/n said with a smile.

✧˚ · .Ace couldn't help but smile as he watched y/n play in the snow with an annoyed grim. But he wanted to make his presence finally known so he did something a normal person would do. START A SNOWBALL FIGHT!! "Hey y/n look here!" y/n didn't even have enough time to turn to the voice when a cold ball of snow hit her face "Hey!! Ace u brat!" Ace couldn't hold back his smirk but it was soon wiped off when a snow ball hit his forehead "Hey! I wasn't ready!" "Neither was i!" as u could guess this lead the two have a snow ball fight while grim was standing a good 7 feet away so he dosent get hit. The snow ball lasted for a while but finally ended when y/n called quits "Hey hey stop i retreat!!" y/n said laughing. Ace put down the snow ball he was about to throw laughing as well. ✧˚ · ."Damn i didnt know you were good at throwing and aiming y/nwith that skill u could be good at basketball you know~"

✧˚ · ." Thanks but no thanks i've already have to deal with taking care of ramshackle and grim i don't want another thing added to my plate"

✧˚ · .y/n looked up and notice the snow getting stronger "jeez the snow is really coming down huh. I think it best to back to our dorms, grim already beat me to it" She said looking at where grim once stood when they were having a snow ball flight. "Oh uh.. Do u mind if i crash at your place? Im the only one left in the dorm and it feels weird not gonna lie" ace said as he scratched the back of his neck "not at all" y/n said smiling at ace. Ace had a faint blush on his cheek but quickly hid it as they walked to Ramshackle. They both entered the dorm and took off their shoes and coats. "You head to the living room the fire place is on, i'll get us some hot cocoa" Ace followed y/n's orders and plopped himself on the couch which was decorated with festive pillows and blankets.

✧˚ · .Y/n soon entered the room with a tray of hot cocoa and placed it on the coffee table and sat down covering their legs with a cozy blanket. "Jeez even with the fire on and the hot cocoa its still freezing cold" y/n said "you know... i have a way of warming up" y/n raised a brow and looked at him. Ace then wrapped an arm around y/n's waist and the other pulling y/n closer to his chest as he rested his head on top of y/n's. Both of them were blushing, but y/n soon recovered from being flustered and buried her head in his chest as she adjusted the blanket so both of them were covered well.

And just like that, the chilly frosty air wasn't so cold anymore~

Requests are open!! ^^

───────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆────────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #disney twisted wonderland #ace trappola x reader #ace trappola #twisted wonderland imagine #twisted wonderland headcanons #disney twst #twst fanfic #twst imagines #twst first years #ace trapolla x yuu

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bookshelf-dust · 1 year

Text

the hurt is good

part i part ii part iii part iv part v part vi

billy hargrove x fem!reader

word count: 5,163

warnings: swearing, cops, talk of jail/billy's abuse, neil, fluff and love

a/n: well, here it is. this is the very last part of my very first series. i am very proud of the ending i've created for these two. i like to think i've given billy what he deserved. i'm so grateful for all of the feedback and support you've given me on the previous parts. also, a part of this relies heavily on hopper’s letter from season 3, so that’s that, and then some of his other dialogue. i’ve found that it fit billy effortlessly. i really hope you enjoy this and maybe find some solace in it. i love you all <333

before you read, listen to: time after time by cyndi lauper and/or the promise by when in rome

————

The first night without Neil, Hopper sits in his car outside the house. He promised no one would hurt them. He means it.

Nicky went to high school with both Hopper and Joyce. In fact, she was suspended for dealing them weed under the bleachers at one point. She regrets nothing to this day.

Because of that, it really wasn’t too difficult to have a heart-to-heart with the man, to get him to sit down with Billy. And Max and you. Susan.

Hopper had shown up at the house to speak with Neil. When he arrived, he told you to keep Billy in his room, though that hadn’t mattered. The second Billy realized he might actually get out of this, that he might live without fear of his own father, he buried his face in your chest, tears wetting your collarbones, your t-shirt.

You’d let him get it all out, stroking his loose and frizzy curls, occasionally laying your hands over his ears to muffle any shouting. Billy squeezed you each time you did so.

Even if he was a little hopeful this might work, Billy couldn’t help but think about that night when he was a kid. When his mama left him with Neil.

He’d sat on his bedroom floor, trying to be quiet while his dad showered, pleading with her.

“Please mom, don’t do this. Please come home.”

“How long? How long?”

“I miss you.”

She was the last person he felt safe with, before you. And she’d gone, leaving her boy with him. Trapped. Part of him wasn’t sure this would work out. He’d hoped for so long that his mother would return, and she hadn’t. Neil had dictated everything in Billy’s life so far, so how was it possible for anything to change?

Hopper had given Neil Hargrove one option.

“You’re gonna sign these papers,” he’d said, gesturing at the divorce packet lying on the table, “and I’m going to quietly take you down to the station and expose you for the piece of shit you are. Lock you up for abusing your child.”

Neil had started screaming about how Hopper had no right to do any of this, to barge into his home claiming all of this.

“Sure, yeah, pitch a fit. Like that’s gonna change anything,” Hopper said, entertained by the fact that Neil was acting like the victim.

During one of the intervals where your hands were pressed to Billy’s ears, the hoop in the left one biting into your palm, you’d caught something Hopper said.

“I suggest you shut your mouth before you give me something else to report.” By the tone in his voice, you could imagine that he was inches from Neil’s face.

“You’re a coward,” Hopper had said. “Beating on your kid because your life didn’t turn out right. Well let me tell you something, that’s not his fault. It’s yours.”

There’d been a knock on Billy’s bedroom door followed by Hop’s gruff voice.

“Y/N, kiddo can I have a minute with you?”

Billy had looked up at you, eyes puffy. “I’ll be right back baby, I’m not leaving, I promise.”

You’d pressed a kiss to his forehead, and he’d held onto your hand until it was too far out of his reach.

Shutting the door carefully behind you, you’d looked at him. “We’re taking him away,” he said.

You blinked. “Really?”

“Really. He signed, so Susan is good to go.”

Hopper considered letting Neil run away, making him just disappear, but he didn’t want to chance him doing this to someone else. He’d already done that once though, hadn’t he?

“I’m really proud of you for helping him through this, kid. You remind me of your mom.”

His hand had been warm on your shoulder.

“If you want me to be honest, he’s lucky this prison isn’t very big. But that doesn’t mean nothing will happen if others figure out what he’s in for.”

You nodded, knowingly.

“Powell and Callahan just got here. We’re gonna be quiet. No lights, nothing. I don’t want to make this worse for Billy. But if he wants to see, we’re going soon.”

“Thank you, Hopper,” you’d said, hugging him. He’d let you. He’d had his fair share of a shitty father as a kid. Helping someone like Billy is something he’d always wanted to do.

Back in Billy’s room, you’d taken his face in your hands.

“Baby, they’re taking him now. Do you want to watch or stay inside?”

His back had straightened. He knew what he wanted, and he told you as much, so you led him through to the back steps, holding his hand the whole time, Max behind you, resting her chin on her brother's arm.

Billy got to watch them shove his father in the back of a police car, hands behind his back.

He was finally free.

————

Susan pawned most of Neil's more expensive things, that way she'd have money to cover bills for a while and have something to put towards the house payment. She hadn't really been trusted with the financials when Neil was around, aside from basic spending. Now that she had two children to look after, she really didn't want to be in a bad spot.

She had a feeling most newly divorced women would use the money to buy themselves something nice, but she didn't see any point in that. This wasn't about her. This was about making a life where Billy and Max could feel safe.

Even if Billy had whined about it to you at first, having dinner with Max and Susan at least three times a week to start was helping. And he would never admit this, but Susan was actually a pretty damn good cook. Whenever she'd prepared food pre-inmate Neil, they'd been kind of shitty. Billy supposed this had been her tiny form of protest.

It's pretty late now, but Billy is sprawled on the couch watching reruns of whatever. He's really not even entirely sure what's happening on tv. He thinks this might be Cheers. It's the fact that he can be on the couch that he's doing it. He doesn't have any particular reason to hide in his room unless he wants to.

He's missed this couch. It's the same one he's sat on since he was a kid. Since his mother was still around. It was one of the few items that made it to Hawkins when they moved.

Susan has the day off tomorrow. She said so at dinner. Hence why she's still up.

Billy hears her footsteps and looks up when she walks into the room. She gives him a gentle smile.

"I'm making Max some hot chocolate. You feel like some? I have marshmallows too, if you want those."

"Uh, yeah, sure. Thanks."

She smiles again and then disappears for a while before returning with a mug that has a six-year-old Max's hand print on it.

Billy sits up and takes a sip. He can't remember the last time someone made him someone other than you or Nicky made him something like this.

Susan sits down a little ways away from Billy in an oversized chair that Max usually claims as her own. The only time anyone else gets to sit in it are in times like these when she's being forced to do science homework with Dustin yapping in her ear. She'd asked for help, not an entirely new lesson. Dustin did not care.

Susan starts to read a book, and Billy almost forgets she's in the room when she speaks.

"Billy?"

His eyes rove across from the television to her over the top of his mug. She sets the book down.

"I just wanted to apologize. For not doing anything to protect you from your dad. I don't really have a reason other than selfish ones, like I was afraid he'd start on me, or Max. I guess I just thought if he got it out things would be okay." She buries her face in her hands.

"God, I'm so sorry, Billy. This is your home, and I came into your life and took you away from where you'd grown up, and I never stopped to think about what it was doing to you. I was only thinking about myself."

“I should’ve helped take care of you. You were just a kid. You’re still just a kid. And I’ve done nothing but let you down. I want to be better. I’m not saying I want to replace your mom or anything, but I don’t want you to feel unsafe or unwelcome here anymore.”

Billy keeps drinking his hot chocolate but he has to hold it with both hands because they’re shaking now.

“I feel like I don’t even know you. And maybe that’s because you didn’t want to know me, or maybe because I just avoided you.”

“I’m just so sorry, Billy. I want to try. I am trying. The both of you deserve so much better and you don’t have to accept this. I just wanted you to know that and that I care about you.”

Billy is quiet and for a moment it scares Susan, but she understands he might not have anything to say. He might not want to say anything. He might be waiting until he can afford to move out of this fucking house.

But Billy finally sets his mug down. It’s empty. He looks at Susan and he nods.

“It’s okay,” he tells her. “I understand. I don’t blame you and I appreciate that you want to try. I want to try, too.”

Susan nods back, a sweet smile on her face. It’s gentle, the look she’s giving him.

Billy does understand though. His being the target of Neil’s abuse prevented both Max and Susan from it. He understands that Susan was afraid of her husband and the man that she might not have known he’d unveil to be. She was scared. He understands.

He’s willing to try. To let her in.

She stands and picks up Billy’s empty cup. “Was it okay?” she asks, “It’s just the store bought kind.”

“Yeah. Yeah it was great.”

When she grins at him she looks young. She looks tired and upset, but maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe it means change. Maybe it means she’s learning. She’s trying.

————

“Wear mine.”

Billy looks at you through the mirror in front of which he’s been primping. He claims he doesn’t like it when you say he’s “getting pretty.” His blush says otherwise.

“Yours?”

He rolls his eyes and puts down the hairspray he was holding. “Yeah. It’s fuckin’ cold tonight. Just put mine on. I don’t want you to walk all the way back to your house just to get something I have.”

You snort, making for his closet door. “All the way back?”

He bumps your hip with his, a common you-little-shit gesture.

“Because I live so far away.” You greet the pornstar taped to the thin wood before sliding it open.

“Should be on the right,” Billy says, ignoring your comment and shoving cologne down the front of his pants while you aren’t looking. It’s a habit at this point. Shit, he doesn’t even think about it, and he knows he doesn’t have to impress you.

You push around the clothing hanging in his closet, a couple button-ups, leather, a sweater you’ve never seen him in. It’s this cream color, thick and cable knit. You pull it out.

“How come you don’t wear this?” you ask, holding it up to him. He unsnaps another button from his shirt and your eyes follow the movement even though you don’t mean to ogle.

Billy looks the sweater up and down like it’s grossing him out. “I wore it once,” he tells you.

“Once,” you mock playfully, putting the shirt back into his closet.

Billy’s hands are on your hips in an instant, spinning you around. “I thought you were getting a jacket, not raiding my belongings.”

You stick your tongue out at him. It’s childish and you know it, but you do it anyway. He smacks your ass in retaliation, and you go to squeeze his but he grabs your wrist, pulling it to his mouth so that he can kiss your pulse point.

“Barf.” The voice makes you turn your head, and Max has pushed the door open fully where it had been cracked.

“Hi, Max,” you say, pulling your hand from Billy’s grasp, even if he pouts, and moving to actually retrieve the denim jacket you’d been instructed to wear.

You can feel Billy and Max staring at each other. “What do you need?” he asks her.

“Just came to see if we were planning on leaving today or if I should maybe hitch a ride elsewhere.” She enters the room and sits down on the edge of her brother’s bed.

Billy glances at his watch. “You said to have you at El’s by seven-thirty. We’ve got time.”

She crosses her arms and Billy faces the mirror again. He thinks he’s finished. “Did you even finish packing your bag, shithead?”

You shove your arms through the jacket sleeves, looking at Max. She raises her eyebrows. No, she definitely did not. There’s a flash of red hair as she hops up, and then she’s gone, the sound of dresser drawers being yanked open and shut echoing down the hall.

You start rolling up the cuffs, and Billy reaches for the collar, adjusting it for you. You’re focused on getting your hands free when you feel Billy’s finger lifting your chin up. He brings his lips to yours, kissing you once. He pulls away and you move back in, wanting one more. He obliges, albeit grinning at your eagerness. When you’ve gotten your fill, you kiss his cheek, and that’s the one that makes him blush.

He moves away from you, pulling on his own jacket. “I’m gonna go start the car, okay?”

“M’kay.”

Max let it slip once that Billy always went out to warm up the car before taking them to school. She wouldn’t have assumed it was for her right off the bat, but when she realized he didn’t do that when it was just him in the car, she figured out it was him being nice. Now he just does it for the both of you. You won’t ever say anything about it.

You look at yourself in Billy’s mirror, listening to his footsteps down the hall and out into the living room. You put your hands in the pockets of his jacket, and to your surprise you feel something. It’s not spare change, or a lighter–anything you would’ve expected to find.

It’s a sheet of paper. You pull it out, thinking it might be homework he tucked away or a receipt or something. It’s not, though. It’s notebook paper, and it’s been neatly folded like it was done with purpose.

You sit on the edge of Billy’s bed, and unfold it. To your surprise, it’s a page covered in his handwriting, that pretty, sometimes faintly cursive scrawl. There are some lines scratched out because he used a pen and couldn’t erase. But the thing that catches your eye is the very first line. It’s just your name. It’s a letter. A letter for you.

Your heart starts to race and you find yourself beginning to read, sinking further into his mattress.

There’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about, it reads.

Feelings. Jesus. The truth is, for so long I’d forgotten what those were. I’ve been stuck in one place. In a cave, you might say. A deep, dark cave. And then I sat with you at lunch, and bought you a book, and suddenly you were part of my life. For the first time in a long time, I started to feel things again. I started to feel happy.

But, tonight I’ve been feeling distant from you. Like I’m pulling away from you or something. I’m sitting here and I’m thinking about the way you looked at me that first night at the record store. The way you held on to me when I slept over for the first time. I’m not even sure if you remember it, but every time I tried to move throughout the night you whined like you were afraid I was going to leave you. Like you needed me.

But you didn’t know about my dad or that I was falling in love with you then. And I can’t stop thinking about how I raised my voice at you when I came over today.

You pause, realizing when it was that he wrote this. The day he fought back.

And I’ve been afraid for so long that I might turn out like him. That I might be just the same. And I’ve been scared that you might realize that too and leave me behind. But I didn’t feel that way today when you spoke to me like a human being and you wanted to work things out. I’m changing. You’re changing me. We’re changing. And I guess, if I’m being really honest, that’s what scares me. I don’t want things to change. Because there’s a part of me that worries you might still change your mind. The rest of me knows you won’t.

So I think maybe what I’m saying is that when you didn’t know about how I felt or who I really am on the inside that it didn’t feel like I’d lose you. But now I’ve let you in and you can see all of me. And now that you’ve said you love me I really don’t want things to change. I don’t want to lose you or want you to go.

But I know that’s naive. To think you’ll leave. That’s not who you are. I know you’d look at me and say that’s not how this is going to work.

My whole life everyone has picked someone else over me. Left me behind. Left me on my own. And I know that’s how life works. It’s moving. Always moving and people change whether you like it or not. But you’ve taught me that change can be good. That it doesn’t always mean people changing their mind about me. About caring about me or that I’m good enough to keep around.

And sometimes change is painful. Sometimes it’s sad and sometimes it’s surprising.

Happy.

So you know what? I don’t think change is bad anymore. I think I’m supposed to learn from it. I think that when life hurts, because I know parts of it are going to hurt and there will be things that always hurt, I should remember it. Because the hurt is good. It means I’m out of that cave.

I just want you to hold my hand while I figure it all out.

You finish reading and fold the letter back up, putting it back where you found it. You hadn’t realized you were crying, but you were, and you spend the next few minutes fixing yourself in Billy’s mirror.

When he returns he thinks you’re the one primping.

“Ready, baby?” he asks. “Max is in the car.”

You turn to him, and he smiles at you. That pretty, pretty smile. You kiss him on both cheeks and then shut off his bedroom light.

“I’m ready.”

————

Billy pulls away from Hop’s cabin after dropping Max off, but he’s quick to stop the car again.

You were quiet the whole way there. Sweet as always, no doubt, but it was clear something was bothering you. He doesn’t like it when things upset his girl.

“What are you doing, Hargrove? We’re gonna miss the movie if you keep this up.”

He raises his eyebrows at you. “Well excuse the hell outta me, hon’.”

You slap your hands against your face, peeking through your fingers at him in hopes that he’ll go ahead and scold you.

“I want you to tell me what’s wrong, baby.” Billy doesn’t have to elaborate. You never seem to have to explain your feelings to him much anymore. It’s like he’s figuring you out, like he understands and knows when something’s bugging you or if you’re hurting.

“It’s nothing bad, I promise,” you say.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t want to know.”

You nod, and reach into the pocket of the jacket, pulling free the paper. It’s seconds before Billy sees the striped sheet that he remembers what it is, what he’d left in there.

It all comes back to him, his wrist hurting from pouring his heart out, the relief he felt at putting his feelings somewhere.

You hand it to him. He unfolds it and scans it over. “You read it?” He knows you did.

“Yeah.” You smile shyly at him, and it’s the same smile you gave him that very first night that you came to check on him. Billy wants to kiss you, so he leans over the center console and does; he presses his mouth to your forehead, warm and sweet. His presence is all-encompassing: heady cologne, minty gum. So very Billy. So much like home.

He hands the paper back to you. “Feelings, huh?” he says, his mouth pulling up at the corners.

“Feelings.”

You sandwich your hands between your thighs, taking a deep breath. Your eyes start to water and you can’t help it.

“Billy, I would never leave you, okay?” You were hoping the tears wouldn’t spill over, but it doesn’t matter because your voice fails you. It wavers and you sound fragile, young. And then he’s taking your face in his hands, wiping under your eyes even though there isn’t anything to wipe yet, just soothing motions over the apples of your cheeks, calloused thumbs and warm skin.

He stares at you, his eye contact unbreaking. When he looks at you like that, blue eyes boring into yours, you can’t help but feel a little full. Because he’s looking at you like that. You.

“I know that. I know.”

You nod, and he nods with you, so much that it looks silly, the both of you nodding, and you start to laugh.

“I made you feel that way? Really?”

“Of course you did,” Billy says. “My whole life I’ve felt like I’m like a black hole or somethin’. You don’t make me feel that way.”

Your heart aches for him. For this boy who’s had no one tell him how good he is. Who’s finally let you in. Who’s finally realized he can have better, and that he deserves to.

“I love you, Billy.”

He kisses you on each cheek, your face warm against his lips. He grins and you can feel it on your face.

“I love you too.”

When you get to the movie theater, you do pay for popcorn, and you do hand him the snacks you kept in your bag after you take your seats. Your mother said movie candy was getting much too expensive.

You pop a handful of Sno Caps in your mouth, and Billy opens his mouth. You sprinkle some in his, and then reach for his hand.

He looks down at your clasped fingers while a kid almost faceplants with a bucket of popcorn on the way up the stairs. Thankfully their father caught them first.

“You did say you wanted me to hold your hand.”

“I did,” Billy says.

—————

“Sit still, I’ll be right back, I swear.”

Billy crosses his arms, but it’s hard for him to look entirely brooding when he’s got plum shadow on his eyelids. You stand. “Here, Max, supervise.” You hand her the brush between your fingers, and she snorts at her brother from where she lays across your bed.

You make for the living room, suppressing a grin at the sounds of laughter emanating from the area. Susan and Nicky sit on opposite sides of the couch, watching The Golden Girls and talking about whatever it is that mothers-of-dating-children talk about.

“Mom,” you say, coming to a stop in front of her.

“Hi, honeybee. What’s the matter?”

“Can I use some of your makeup? There’s some things you’ve got that I haven’t and–”

She smiles at you, adjusting the well-loved pillow squished behind her back. “You know you can. Whatever you need.”

Her grin is contagious, and you find yourself smiling back just the same. “Thank you.”

She nods. “Playing dress up?” Your mother gives you a knowing look, thinking about the idea you’d had in mind ever since you watched Rocky Horror with Billy that first time.

“You could say so,” you tell her, and then you’re off to raid her bathroom cabinet, pulling free the large and full bag of goodies.

You start to rifle through the corduroy pouch, but decide it’d be easier to take the whole thing with you to your room, so that’s what you do.

When you return, you settle on your knees in front of your boyfriend, still finding it odd that you get to call him that now, even if that is exactly what he is to you. Your pretty, pretty boyfriend. Your boyfriend who’s letting you do his makeup.

Max hands you your brush back, raising herself up on her elbows so that she can watch the show better.

“Hi,” you say to him, pressing a kiss on the tip of his nose.

“Hi,” he responds, his voice showing all signs that he’s both enjoying this, yet also grumping about the fact that he let you do it in the first place. He settles back on his hands, legs spread so that you can sit in between them and reach him. You pull free both the pencil of thick liner you’d been looking for, and a pot of blush you know to be much pinker than the one you’ve got. Yours has also been broken on multiple occasions so that now it’s just little bits of pink powder sliding around in the pan.

You uncap the liner first, a warm brown shade, clearly freshly sharpened by your mother. “Close your eyes, pretty please,” you tell him. He obliges, lids fluttering shut.

You reach out, and starting to drag the tip of the pencil across his skin, you realize your hand isn’t as steady as you’d like, considering the fact that you’re also half-focused on not kneeing Billy in a place you’re quite sure he’d prefer to not be kneed.

You let out a frustrated sigh, and Billy blinks up at you. “What’s wrong?”

“This isn’t working. Just–” You shove the eyeliner pencil into his hands, and then move from between his legs. You grip his calves and move his legs together, then crawl forwards a little and straddle his lap.

He grins up at you, a cocky and mischievous look. “Comfy?”

“Shut up and close your eyes again.”

“Well you don’t want much.”

You pinch the squish of his side and he swats blindly at your arm. You take Billy’s face in your hand, resting the pinky of your dominant one against his cheekbone. This go around you’re able to drag the liner effectively across his eyelid. A tap at his face signals he needs to look up, and when he does, you do the same to his lower hip. Afterwards, you take a super small brush that Max found and use it to smudge the eyeliner out some, that way the lines aren’t so harsh.

You finish and take Billy’s face in your hands again, turning it to face Max. “Thoughts?”

She taps her chin, though smiling all the same. “Very nice.”

With a little more manhandling, you get some mascara on those lashes of his, though not without a little pleased squeaking in the process. It’s at the blush that you get excited enough to make him laugh. You swipe your brush heavily across his cheeks, and then the tip of his nose, where you’re probably much too generous. You don’t care. He looks so, so pretty, all blushy like this.

“Part your lips.” You say, thumb tugging at his bottom one. You put a gloss on Billy’s lips and almost lose it for good. He’s so gorgeous.

When you finish, you wipe your hands clean on a towel and back up a little ways from him to survey your work.

You clap your hands. “Max, help me. Would you look at this?”

She does, laughing gleefully. “Oh my god, this is so good.”

You look Billy in the eyes, and Max hops up off of your bed to get a better look. “You look so gorgeous, my love.”

He’s thankful for the blush in that moment, because without it you’d see the effect your using that name had on him.

“Thank you,” he says.

“Wanna see?” God, you look so happy.

“Do I have to?”

You bite your lip and Billy pulls it free, taking the little handheld mirror from you.

And, honestly, he thinks he looks kinda hot. You picked a good eyeshadow color, one that makes his blue eyes stand out even more, and he just looks pretty. Just as you’d said.

“Do you like it?”

“Yes. You did a very good job.”

He goes to kiss you, but you stop him. “Nope. You’ll mess up my work!”

Billy rolls his eyes and flips Max a bird when he sees her giggling at your enthusiasm and his compliance.

“Can I take a picture?” you ask.

Billy holds up his hands. “Oh hell no.”

“Billy, she needs to document her masterpiece,” Max says, though really she knows it’d make great blackmail. That and she loves how happy the both of you seem. She’d like to remember this too.

“Please?” You give him your very best puppy dog eyes, making sure they’re watery and everything. You know he’ll give in.

“Fine. But you show this to anyone, and you’re both dead.”

You laugh, grabbing for your Polaroid camera. “Who the fuck do you think I’m gonna show? Everyone I know is in this room.”

Billy’s smiles then, and you’re just quick enough to catch it. You get another after you kiss his sparkly forehead. And when you’ve finished, you stick them in the frame of your mirror so they’ll always be there.

That night, after Max and Susan have gone home, you sit in the bathroom to help Billy wash the makeup off, but only when you’d let Nicky see, and she thought he looked stunning. Showstopping, she’d said.

And it’s then, as you wipe the rosy tinge from his cheeks, revealing his freckles once again, that you realize months before this you’d been so alone. You’d ached for a moment like this.

And here you were. So even if the journey to get here had hurt, even if it’d been hard and pushed you to your limits, it’s okay. Because that’s how life works. It hurts sometimes. And that’s okay.

Because the hurt? The hurt is good.

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

#billy hargrove #billy hargrove x you #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x fem!reader #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove fic #billy hargrove fanfic #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy stranger things fic #billy stranger things #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove series #billy hargrove angst #billy hargrove comfort #billy hargrove fluff #jim hopper #max mayfield #billy hargrove x female reader #savannah’s fics

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gateau-au-earl · 2 months

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kuroshitsuji s4e1/ED thoughts

ok yall now that it has been over 24 hrs and I've seen the ep over three times, I have THOUGHTS. mostly very positive, everything was beautful to look at and the 1:1 comparisons between the manga and the anime made me very happy as a veteran kuro fan that had to live through the mess of s1 and s2 plots (even tho they might have a sentimental place in my heart just because of nostalgia).

but i wanted to come on here and yap about the ending theme and how it encapsulates sebastian and ciel's complicated and very interesting relationship. idk abt yall but im a big fan of the op and ed this season!

first things first just to get this outta the way, I dont interpret them as a ship so please dont come in here with that interpretation 👁️ I'm serious .

that being said -

the ending theme is beautiful in both its animation and what it says about the butler and earl's relationship. I'm just gonna get the gushing outta the way first but it was aesthetically GORGEOUS in its animation. the way ciel fell so gracefully and the colors with SID's music is cinematic perfection. the change in animation style is very easy on the eyes as well! gg cloverworks animation team!

this has been marinating for a while, but what really gets me is the scene where ciel falls. he is falling into darkness, when it suddenly becomes lighter, with the sun illuminating the clouds. sebastian "saves" him and they fall together across this very pretty backdrop.

the demon might've caught him, but that doesn't prompt him to rescue ciel, to stop him from falling to his death.

sebas instead gently takes ciel's hand to guide him there. he gives ciel a false sense of security, of trust, catching the boy when he's at his darkest place, but instead of saving him, he drags him to down to his hell. he is deceiving ciel with a beautiful view and promises in their contract that will ultimately hurt ciel. its cruel and will only lead to pain for our earl.

sebas is a demon (obviously) who is leading ciel to his doom, but the path they take is twisted and tragic but strangely beautiful like the gorgeous sky in the ED.

ciel enjoys the power and omnipotence he has with sebastian, knowing full well the demon is leading him to his demise. he knows that this relationship will end him being sebastian's dinner. ciel knows he can't trust sebas, but does anyways because sebas is the only person who can't hurt him until he inevitably does.

the fall might result in an ugly death, but the view is pretty nice on the way down. the beautiful sky colored with deception, manipulation and misplaced trust.

yeah, sebastian will end up hurting ciel the most at the end, but the boy doesn't care at the moment. sebas is the only ""person"" who knows him with all the ugliness of his past, yet still protects him, serves him, and doesn't treat him like a helpless creature. so ciel is forced to place trust in a fundamentally untrustworthy creature knowing he is inches away from the demons bared fangs.

sebastian helps him survive his living hell now and get what he needs to get done, so he doesn't care what happens after. his descent to darkness becomes much more beautiful as a result.

shippers may have one interpretation (which I'm NOT a fan of...), but this is how I see it, and I think it makes this ending all the more impactful and tragic. but here I am, and I'm enthralled by the beauty and can't look away.

anyways, thanks for reading my brain dump, and looking forward to ep 2 folks!!! hope yall liked my micro analysis/semi organized gushing, and r enjoying this kuro renaissance as much as I am! here's a professor michaelis for reading this far

#kuroshitsuji #kuroshitsuji analysis #ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis #black butler #shoukuzai sid #professor michaelis #kuroshitsuji public school arc #kuro spoilers #kuroshitsuji s4 #kuroshitsuji ED #do not tag as ship :/#not ship #my two cents do with it what u will #gateau au earl #long post

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ystrike1 · 1 year

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Remarried Empress - By Alphatart (9.5/10)

I've waited a long, long time for this. I'm not sure if this review will offend anyone, but here I go. I am not insinuating that Remarried Empress is a traditional yandere story. Obsession is not the focus. Especially not during the first season, but longtime readers know the drama eventually boils over. Delusion, denial, and love all clash during the fabulous finale. The line between villain and hero blurs in a beautiful way halfway through the story.

Spoilers for everything (I mean it) ahead!!!

Remarried Empress is well known for its seamless magic integration. Fantasy webtoons are infamous for clunky, wordy spellcasting systems and magic schools with zero charm.

That is not the case here.

Magic is a plot point that has little to no relevance during the first quarter of the story. We get hints. The issue grows. We get drama from the very beginning, from the perspective of a powerful woman trapped in a toxic marriage. The woman in question is the Empress, Navier, who has no magic whatsoever. Magic is an important political power tool. It doesn't magically make you more important. Lots of badly written stories love to give their protagonists fantastical magical powers, as if that power gives you the ability to rule.

This is not the case here.

Navier gains magical powers at the very end of the story. It is part of her happy ending. It is not the reason why she is successful in her political endeavors. Navier loves ruling. She was raised for it, and uprooting corruption gives her joy. Drama and sparkles are not her source of power. She is a borne and true politician who recognizes that the nobility cannot prosper without happy, healthy common people. She receives magic when her duplicitous and extremely loving husband decides she is worthy of it. It's sort of a wedding gift. Yes, it's a very morally dubious part of the story. The magic imbuing process starts without her permission.

(I won't spoil all the details. Don't be too mad at Heinrey.)

Navier is from the Trovi family. Her family line has produced multiple Eastern Empire ex-Empresses. Magic is on the decline. The Eastern Empire has less active wizards than ever before, and they can't figure out why. Luckily the nation has a steady Empress and Emperor to rely on. Naiver and Sovieshu have a good relationship. She loves him more than he loves her. They mostly live separate lives. They don't even eat together every day, because they are both so busy, but Navier trusts Sovieshu. They were raised together as children. The priest who married them thought they would be different. A rare, happy royal couple.

Souvieshu ruins that lifelong relationship when we brings in a runaway slave. The lovely young woman, Rashta, got caught in one of the Emperors animal traps! How awful! He takes responsibility for the terrible accident. He carries her to the doctor on horseback the way any decent man would.

He almost immediately makes her his Official Mistress. There is a formal title, as mistresses are common for Emperors. Naiver has to go through a humiliating process. She has to welcome, and give a spending allowance to, the woman her beloved husband is sleeping with. She even has to throw parties for the woman her husband is currently spoiling instead of her.

Ouch.

(Yes. You are correct. It is revealed later that the accident was no accident. Rashta jumped in harms way in a desperate attempt to escape her shackles as a slave. A slave who had a bastard child with her owners son. When said son decided he didn't want to lower himself and marry her Rashta dolled herself up. She ran into the royal woods looking gorgeous on purpose. She would have been a cool protagonist, in another life, but she's just not tough enough to survive royal intrigue. In her desperation she loses everything. It does sound tragic, until you get to know her. Rashta is a child abusing, bloodthirsty, narcissistic tattle-tale by the end of her story. I'm sure you can guess how it ends.)

Throughout season one we see how integral the Empress is to the East. At first it seems like everyone favors the Emperor, but things are not what they seem. Empress Navier runs a tight ship. She doesn't need to be babied like Souvieshu. A gap slowly begins to grow between them. His incompetence starts to shine bright when he lashes out at his Empress. He blames her for every little problem his Mistress encounters. Including the problems Rashta makes up to cause unnecessary drama. Rashta makes little mistakes that pile up over time. Her allies aren't very strong, and she is never honest with anyone. She talks like a cute idiot on purpose, but that backfires when she can't find a teacher willing to put up with her as a result. She can't catch up to Navier. A genius couldn't. Navier has been privy to national secrets since her youth. Trying to catch up on that much reading...just isn't possible for a regular, but gorgeous, slave. Also, Rashta is desperately hiding her slave status. Rashta starts to copy Navier in obvious ways, and Navier is refreshingly human about it. She hates it. She tells Rashta to learn on her own, and she isn't always diplomatic about it. Her complaints push her into an intimate but platonic friendship with the Prince of the Western Kingdom, Heinrey.

Heinrey has a special kind of magic. He can turn into a bird. He uses his bird form as an excuse to stick close to Navier, because he's carrying a MASSIVE torch for her. It is not just a crush. He's bitter about being younger than her. If they were the same age he would have gotten the chance to woo her, but Souvieshu was the most convenient and familiar choice for her family. Navier was a couple years out of his reach. He thought he would have to sulk about losing the chance to have her forever, but then Souvieshu stirs the pot. Sidenote Souvieshu is very insecure. He expects his Empress to love him over everything. He got upset when Navier...you know...did her job well. He wanted his wife to be drooling over him constantly or something. It's weird. He is also quite sexist. This becomes more obvious as the story goes on. He treats Rashta like an object, and he loses interest in her after less than a year. That's suspiciously fast. He is only using Rashta to satisfy his craving for cute attention. It's quite pathetic. They both are.

Anyway moving on.

Heinrey "visits on diplomatic business", but in reality he's planning to take over the East. Yeah. That's something. The writing is really on another level. I had no clue whatsoever until later on. He also stole the magic by the way. Yeah. Heinrey is the reason why their magicians just can't cast anymore. An adorable young student despairs before the Empress about her crushed dreams in tears. All while Heinrey is just standing there, in the background, completely aware of the fact that he is the cause of her suffering.

He's a pretty scary guy.

Navier eventually agrees to flee the country and marry him.

Rashta's lies leave no other choice for her. Rashta falls pregnant. Navier has never been pregnant. As the woman, she has always received the blame. Cough. Sexism. Cough. Souvieshu is actually infertile due to a childhood accident. He, of course, is completely convinced that Navier is the infertile one. Rashta is carrying another baby that belongs to her masters son. She is willing to put an illegitimate child on the throne to get power, because she doesn't know any better. There are certain things peasants just don't know. A magical paternity test exists. It involves droplets of blood and a mixture of special water. After Rashta gives birth to a child that looks nothing like Souvieshu he gets wise. Souvieshu makes Rashta Empress (temporarily) for the sake of "his" child. He always intended to remove Rashta from the Empress seat, as soon as "his" child was seen as legitimate by the court of law. His callous attitude is what convinces Navier to leave. She has always loved her husband. She loved him more than she thought she did. She put up with real pain to support him, but he decided to remove her from her Empress seat. She didn't know he graciously planned to take her back after the divorce, but it doesn't matter.

The incident proves he never respected her, so she leaves with Heinrey to become the Western Queen.

The West isn't really as powerful as an Empire yet, but oh! Wait! As soon as Navier is crowned and by his side Heinrey proclaims that the Kingdom is an Empire now.

How convenient!

Heinrey is pretty and morally grey, but he is a good husband. He worships the ground Navier walks on. When rumors about her infertility start spreading he does not give a crap. He has ways to fix the issue if it's true, and if she's actually not the infertile one he's ready to kill whoever started the story. His bird form is cute enough to be a marketable plushy. It's shitty that he lied about being a bird for the entire first season, but Navier needed comfort. He provided it how he could. As a pet. Yes I know it's weird. Navier wasn't willing to befriend him at first though. He had to use his adorable bird body to bring her guard down!

Wait.

That makes him sound worse...

He's a good husband though.

I swear...

This is Christa. The young dowager Queen of the newly formed Western Empire. Heinrey's sick brother kicked the bucket. Now Heinrey is Emperor and he's brought a foreign Empress home. Slight problem. Christa is in love with Heinrey. She uses a spiked love potion, and a man who is madly in love with Naiver, in an attempt to seduce him and destroy the couple. Christa is pathetic, like Rashta, but she's a little smarter. Her love for Heinrey is the weakness that brings her down. She kills herself after she boldly claims that Heinrey slept with her, in an attempt to become his Mistress. Heinrey produces proof that the affair doesn't exist...and Christa doesn't recover mentally.

Fair warning.

Remarried Empress gets darker and darker until the ending.

Heinrey throws a party, to celebrate Navier's pregnancy, right after her death.

Suddenly I don't think Heinrey is cute anymore...

This is Grand Duke Kaufman. He falls in love with Navier. He accidentally used a love potion he was experimenting with. It turns out that the potion effects are extra strong when you already have a crush. Kaufman never intended to act on his feelings, but the potion eventually turns him into a madman.

His story ends after he attacks the Empress.

I think you already know how that ending looks.

Rashta ties everything together really well as a villain. She looks like an idiot, but for a commoner who didn't even know how to write she does pretty well. Her idiotic copycat act is a distraction. It cleverly hides the mastermind behind the scenes. Heinrey. Navier had no clue Heinrey was in love with her when she accepted his proposal. She accepted it because she was desperate to rule. She didn’t want to watch Rashta take her place, and Heinrey took advantage of that.

He sweeps her off her feet. They live happily ever after, but the pile of bodies behind them is quite steep.

(Souvieshu realizes he made a mistake as soon as Navier marries Heinrey. He starts drinking heavily. He travels to the West again and again to beg her to take him back. He quietly goes insane and he eventually loses his memories. He lives on thinking Navier is still his fiance, and everything is the way it used to be. Navier will always love him. That's his drunken dream. When his memories return he begs yet again and he says he'll accept Heinrey's children as his own, because they have her blood. Her goes seriously insane in six different ways. He also basically forgets Rashta ever existed.)

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #webtoon #fantasy novel #light novel #Remarried Empress

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destinygoldenstar · 1 month

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Ninjago Dragons Rising Season 2 - Is It Good Or Nah?

So, I'm late to the party, aren't I?

Well I've had so much work that I think I'm having an existential crisis. So I had to wait till I had a free day to watch this season because I wanted to watch it with my GF.

We got to Episode 6, and then what did my boss do?

Slap me in the face with long work hours several days of the week.

I feel like I'm in a spiral of work after work after work with no purpose to life besides failure cause I can't trust myself to be capable at anything-

ANYWAY. We finished it now.

You know what the insane part about the season is? That it got the show trending on Tumblr.

That's an INSANE level of hype right there.

So I seriously had to ask myself "What the actual f**k happened in the show that caused THIS much hype?!"

So... here are my thoughts on the season.

SPOILER WARNING

Okay, so this may be a factor of my judgement, but due to my schedule, I was forced to watch only 6 Episodes one day, and then the last 4 Episodes today. Keep that in mind.

When it came to the first half of the season, was it good?

Yes. Obviously.

Was it living up to the insane level of hype?

Uh... not really for me??

Now, don't take that as a negative. This season is still REALLY good.

After the first season took awhile to get started as it needed to set up its characters and this new world, it makes sense for this season to throw the punches immediately.

The season gets started with its main plot right away with Ras immediately putting his plan into action, and by Episode 2, it's very clear the threat level he opposes and it's believable that we should be intimidated by what he wants.

Even though in Episode 2's fight, while AMAZINGLY choreographed, I was just screaming at the screen "HIT THE PERSON HOLDING THE GONG."

Like seriously, more than one of the characters in this fight can use projectiles with their powers AND they have a blaster in the Bounty, and the show never says that Ras has some sort of armor defense preventing him from getting blasted. He's literally standing out in the open. And the gong is clearly what's giving Cinder power. So HIT THE PERSON WITH THE GONG.

GOSH.

Anyway, that's not important. What's important is that this season's fight choreo is genuinely AMAZING. I am obsessed with the way the camera moves with the characters in these fights you have no idea. I was genuinely blown away by the last episode's fight in particular. But more on the ending later.

What also shocked me was how BRUTAL some of the stuff that happens here is, which caught me off guard.

I mean, Episode 2 has Euphrasia getting ambushed and crashed off the Cloud Kingdom with clear injuries, and Wyldfyre getting her leg SHATTERED. Like, WHAT?! HOW OFTEN DOES THAT HAPPEN?!! (Even though the latter's healing was unrealistic. Like, it would realistically take months for an injury like that to heal. Not a critique, just saying.)

Ras body slams Jordanna at one point. He puts Arin in a CHOKEHOLD. And also beats him up so brutally... like OMG this guy does not mess around.

The Fear Cave Trial also REALLY got me tripping. Not only was it such a visually appealing moment, but it also, as the same suggests, showed several character psyches that were insane.

Except Kai for some reason. That's gonna drive me NUTS until I get an answer. WHAT DID HE SEE-?!

Then we get to the dragon mentors, and...

Yeah the season kinda loses me in the middle.

Don't get me wrong, I love the character bits here as much as anyone. But with how dyer they made the threat of Ras before, Ras and his forces take a backseat in the middle portion of the season and we're mostly just sitting at these training grounds talking. And for four episodes of it? It's a little grating, even if it is important.

The middle is mostly where most of my issues with the season stand. And here's where I get all my negatives out of the way:

Like I said, because this season is so long, there's an awkward pause in the conflict on the dragons plotline to learn this Rising Dragon Technique. Which I wouldn't mind if it wasn't FOUR EPISODES of it.

With the exception of the attack at the Land of Lost Things ONCE, Ras's army doesn't go after the ninja at all. I can kinda get the dragons group since they didn't have Bonzle, but he has to know that they ARE a threat, right? They're obviously trying to figure out how to stop you.

And even with the group that has Bonzle, what they NEED, the forces that go after that group is the Administration and the one off magician man villain, the former really didn't need to be in this season even if it was for a compelling Jay cameo, and the latter has overstayed his welcome at this point and I just rolled my eyes when he showed up on screen.

I'm all for Cole being a badass as much as the next guy, but WHY this magician man, who at this point, is so disconnected with the main antagonistic forces that he serves no purpose?

Why not, I don't know, use this screen time instead to explain what in the world happened with Cole when he left?

Seriously, the first season had this huge cliffhanger with Cole's character and him going after Wu's ghost. I wonder what's gonna happen to him and what he's gonna find out-

Oh. He's just back.

That to me is a huge disappointment. What was the point of him leaving the Lost Family in the first place if this journey was basically nothing? He doesn't even talk about it! COME ON NOW.

Also I think Zane should get slay pass on the Administration guy that called him equipment. What do y'all think?

I don't like Egot. Or whatever his name was. He's very condescending and cryptic and talks down to his only hope of the world being saved. But I think I'm supposed to dislike him for it, and there's gonna be more of his characterization revealed later, so don't take this one as a critique. The female one is great though.

The sorceress lady was... a choice in the narrative. My one critique for the ending was the potion shenanigans. Not because they were bad, but because they just felt so out of place among everything else. Like, "Oh, this finale is too dark and intense! We need to occasionally cut to wacky shenanigans with this sorceress's magic to prevent kids from feeling too much dread!"

I don't know, for me, I would've placed this stuff with the Administration instead, and instead have the group fight Jordanna, lose, and have her get away and flow that to Arin getting to her. Especially since the Administration posed such little threat to them and they even say such.

(I also have a theory that this sorceress is Wyldfyre's birth mom. I have no evidence to back this up besides "They both have red hair and similar facial structure")

With Cloud Kingdom getting taken over and Euphrasia captured, I thought she would have more of a role to play in this since this is, you know, her HOME and she's their guardian.

But nope. She does next to nothing up until the very end and plays prisoner and waits for the ninja to save her.

For gosh sake girl, you're the master of wind. FLY.

And finally, my last critique, Cinder.

Yeah I'm sorry, I'm not buying this character so far. Not that I don't think he'll have anything to do in the second part, but for how threatening he was in Episode 2, that threat level kinda vanishes in the middle and only comes back at the end. He does next to nothing and we learn nothing about him other than "He likes power". Jordanna is probably more unlikeable, but at least she has conflict going on with Ras and her magic, and she still serves more of a role in the plan besides being a foot soldier.

And... yep. That's all my critiques for this season. Which all seem pretty minor.

You know what this season is real good at? Characters.

As though that wasn't obvious already.

I did NOT expect Bonzle to play any major role at all, I thought she was just gonna be the dry and cynical side character. But no. She has a history. She has a life. She has emotions. All of which REALLY shine through at the end when you hear her voice have more range in it. The VA killed it. I ended up feeling so bad for her.

Especially considering what happens to her.

They're also not even hiding it anymore with Geo x Cole. They're just NOT. I love them and I hope we see more of their relationship in the future.

I genuinely don't understand the critique of "Geo is so selfish referring to him as Cole's family when it's obvious Cole has other people in his life."

Well no shit, you ever heard of a character flaw?

But it's also a completely understandable flaw. You guys aren't forgetting the part where Geo was abandoned for being a mixed race, right? Of course he's gonna cling to someone as compassionate and encouraging as Cole.

The Jay cameo was nice. I expect him to play no role in this season, but it's really compelling what they showed and I was satisfied with it.

Lloyd's conflict was handled very well in my opinion.

What's it called when it's PTSD, but it's about future events rather than past events? Foresight Traumatic Stress Disorder? FTSD? Yeah let's go with that.

For a kids show that glosses over trauma, (That's not a Ninjago problem, that's a kids show problem), it was really refreshing for them to not do that for once. It's actually explored and talked about and Lloyd is given advice on how to cope with it, and he freezes up in panic attacks when these visions happen and-THANK YOU. THANK YOU FOR NOT IGNORING HOW HARD SOMETHING LIKE THIS IS.

Seriously, as someone who is going through stuff like this, minus the magic element, it spoke to me a lot. It really shows that this show grew up with me, and I both love and hate that.

I do think this sort of arc is going to hit hard for adults much more than kids.

Are kids constantly terrified of the future and getting paralyzed with these fears and finding it difficult to cope with the traumas that is time and human life?

No?

Kai is also a standout in this, especially towards the end. This is by far the best Kai has been in a long time in terms of quality. I love how one of his most significant flaws gets addressed here, that being his overreliance on himself and his own abilities over the others, who he feels responsible to protect.

And the way he grasps with that and learns to let loose like he did as a child back in the old days through what he loves the most, that being his family. And the flashbacks with him and his sister. And the whole sequence of him learning Rising Dragon - AUGH ITS SO GOOD.

How poetic is it that the character most devoted to family since childhood is only cocky and angry because of his own desire to be the one with power to keep them safe, gets power by letting that go, being a kid again, and joining the same roots as his own family?

AND THEN HE GIVES UP HIS LIFE FOR THEM-

And finally, Arin.

Oh you poor sweet, sweet child.

First of all, yes, I am completely subscribed to the theory that the show is building up Arin turning on the ninja and becoming a villain. It's all there. It all fits. The amount of times they say how sweet he is as though that's gonna get lost. The dragons, the creators of the world, the gods basically, telling him he's not good enough. Ras confronting him. Sora's stunt even after she's been the most encouraging of him, like the BETRAYAL there. It's all there. And I will be posting my theory scenario on this don't you worry.

BUT, I don't think that's the route they're gonna go. Kids show and all of that. They wouldn't do that to one of their main characters. Unless you're Star Wars. At most I think Arin will be tempted by Ras's master's power in an episode and even do it, but then with the power of love and friendship, it'll get fixed.

So instead I'd rather say that Arin, by far, has the BEST power crisis arc of the entire show so far.

I LOVE that he doesn't get powers. That's something the original show would've done. I LOVE that he doesn't figure anything out in the end and his inner doubts get proven correct. That's something the original show would not have the guts to do.

I liked Arin in the first season, but he didn't interest me too much. Mostly because Sora had the lion share of focus in the first season. Here though? He might just take the crown for THE most relatable character. And I both love and hate it so much.

Like, seeing everyone else succeed in mastery while you can't even figure out your own thing. You get told you have a natural talent and a lot of potential and that you're good at a lot of things, only for that to be put to the test in the real world and you end up letting everyone down. Even when your loved ones encourage you that you are good enough and you're special in your own way, you can't get those voices out of your head and you mess up again and again and again to try and meet the world's expectations. Then those in charge tell you you're not good enough and wasted potential. Then you try everything out in the real world anyway and you FAIL, and those that doubt you and your own insecurities get proven correct as you're left a broken mess of a young child who doesn't know what the hell they're doing-

I'M IN THIS SHOW AND I DON'T LIKE IT.

I probably love Sora more as a character, but I will admit I grasp towards Arin more right now. Sora's a great trans allegory in a world that hates trans people. But I'm not trans so I relate to it a bit less. Arin's a great autistic allegory in a world that doesn't know how to help autistic people. And I am autistic so I relate to it more. That's just a me situation.

I am so invested in where Arin's story goes from here. Evil or not.

So yeah, the season was good, but didn't completely live up to the insane hype, which, to be fair, is a high bar.

UNTIL THE LAST FOUR EPISODES.

And then all of a sudden, I AM SHOCKED AND SHAKEN TO MY CORE.

These last four episodes are an absolute emotional roller coaster that left me shaking and screaming the whole time.

I actually SCREAMED at multiple occasions.

I actually screamed so many times watching this that I am now HOARSE.

THAT'S how hard it hit me.

The story goes from 0 to 100 the moment the Blood Moon shows up. Which was what the whole season was building up to. And it did NOT disappoint.

The race to try and protect Bonzle. The intense visions and paralysis Lloyd suffers from. Ras and the army coming back to the plot to be absolute powerhouses. The last episode of DREAD the entire time to desperately try to stop this ritual.

HUMAN SACRIFICES?! AM I WATCHING A KIDS SHOW RIGHT NOW?!?!

I was begging for Arin to succeed at getting Bonzle to safety, even though I knew he stood no chance against Ras. "Come on Arin! You got this!! YOU GOT THIS, SWEETIE!!"

And then Ras just goes to TOWN on the poor boy and taunts his utter failure, which HURTS SO BAD MAN.

The entire fight with the army, Cinder, and Ras. The destruction of the mechs which knocks them unconscious for a bit. Kai figuring out Rising Dragon again when his family gets put in danger. The way Nya avenges her brother afterwards.

When Bonzle was getting morphed back into spell form, BEGGING, I was begging too.

But they still do it!

And KAI?!?!

I couldn't even process what happened other than me screaming. From the moment Ras alluded to sacrificing Kai against his consent, I was screaming "NO. DON'T DO IT."

AND THEN THEY SACRIFICE HIM.

LIKE HOLY GOSH THIS FINALE DID NOT MESS AROUND.

I predicted a while back, in the first season actually, that Kai was gonna get sacrificed at some point. Who's laughing now? I DID NOT WANT TO BE RIGHT.

Like, usually in Ninjago the character would be willing to sacrifice themselves for the others. But here? This is without Kai's consent at all. Ras might as well have killed him right here.

It definitely felt that way with the way the others react and BEG for his safety. The way Nya avenges him.

And Kai giving up his shot at escape for the sake of his family? BRO. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

It hurts even more when you realize that when the Merge happened, Lloyd was ALONE thinking only he survived. He only gained hope again because of his reunion with Kai. His beloved surrogate brother!

AND NOW HE'S GONE.

NYA AND LLOYD LOST THEIR BROTHER.

WYLDFYRE LOST HER SURROGATE FATHER.

THEY THINK HE'S BASICALLY DEAD.

BRO. THAT'S SOUL CRUSHING.

And then Sora?! Why you gotta betray Arin like that?!

The most encouraging friend towards Arin, the person who held onto hope and praises for him the most, betrays that hope and doesn't trust him enough to get the winning blow himself. Then LIES about it.

GIRL. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

That's going to be SO compelling once that gets outed. Like, morally, that was messed up and she was definitely in the wrong, BUT it led to the best possible outcome for them at the moment. They WON because she did NOT believe in Arin's abilities. Which only proves that the doubts about Arin's said abilities are correct.

And I have a gut feeling she's gonna learn Spinjitsu on top of that. And once that happens... double ouch.

Again, Evil Arin Theory.

I really hate to say it, but this reminds way too much of Arcane. If you know what I'm talking about.

I am totally imagining a situation similar to that in my head, that being a rescue mission for Kai, they decide to leave Arin out of it because of the lack of faith in him, he tags along anyway and he ruins their plan and Kai stays trapped there, Lloyd and Sora lash out on him for it, and before they can apologize they get thrusted back by something and Ras and Ras's master find Arin and take him in-

Again, I'll make a post about that.

The finale was by far the best part of this season. It has been a long time since Ninjago has made me HOARSE from being too invested.

That has not happened to me since Sons of Garmadon.

Because, yeah, I actually have NO IDEA where any of this is headed. How are they gonna save Kai and Bonzle? Why did some of Lloyd's visions not come true? What in the world is going on with Ras? Will the Administration help with that? Will the source dragons help with that?

What I probably do know is that Part 2 of this season is going to turn this into the best Ninjago Product since Tournament of Elements. Maybe even top it depending on my rewatches if my problems are still problems.

So... yeah. Good or Nah? Good. Obviously.

The hype is a little overblown to me, but it still deserves the hype.

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theinstagrahame · 1 month

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One of the best things about Crowdfunding is, stuff arrives even when you're cutting way back on spending. A *ton* of stuff arrived in the last month and a bit. Got a bunch of really neat projects in, and it's time to get hype about it!

Why these games rule, under the cut

The Revenant Society: Banana Chan is one of those names that immediately catches my attention when she's on a project. Actually, looking at the list again, the team for this game was stacked, it was a real All-Star Cast. But like, even without the powerhouse designers on the case, this just gets all the things I want in a game: Time loops, murder mysteries, trapped on the Underground. A PbtA game where you solve your own murder is, y'know, a pitch that'll attract my attention.

Hellwhalers: I saw this game coming up through design phases in the Plus One Exp Discord, and it sounded incredible. Using tokens and an old ship betting game, you're part of a whaling crew chasing Moby Dick into actual hell. Maybe Ahab wasn't crazy after all, and maybe we won't survive.

Xenolanguage: I might own everything Thorny Games makes now, because they make games about language. Folks who may not know me might not know that I *love* linquistics. Honestly, if I could repeat college, I'd put more of my time into Linguistics. But due to the linear nature of time, I'll settle for playing games about decoding alien language in a first contact situation. Sorta like that movie Contact. Which, I loved.

Mothership and Desert Moons of Karth: I read through the original version of Mothership a couple of years ago, and it's one I wanted to get more into. When I saw that there was a chance to pick up the full 1e boxset on KS, I jumped. I've also seen tons of people talk about Karth as a really awesome sandbox module for the system, so when I had a little cash on DTRPG from selling books, it was an easy pickup.

Inscrutable Cities: Possum Creek Games told me to back this, so I did (this is a joke, but I do love PCG a whole lot). In reality, I saw Inscrutable Cities on Itch a while ago, and the pitch grabbed me. I love reading solo journaling games (I still haven't found a way I like to play them, if I'm completely honest, but they're really neat reads). Walking through an impossible city is something I'd love to do, so, I have the book for it now.

Reap: Spencer Cambell makes bangers, and bangers only. I'm not *not* on a mission to collect all of his work, but Necromancers? Solo tactical board games, built on Rune? Sure. I'm in.

Luna: Spencer Campbell makes bangers, and bangers only. I also picked up another of his books this month. The Nova universe? Moon cultists trying to destroy the sun? Sure, I'm in.

3 Moonlight on Roseville Beach zines: I played Moonlight on Roseville Beach on my now-defunct podcast, and it's a game that I honestly think about a lot. The dice system was complicated, but in a really neat way that gave the players a ton of really interesting decisions with every roll. What part of my action succeeds? What kinds of complications am I opening myself to?

Anyway, R. Rook put together some characters, mysteries, and monsters for the game, and I really wanted to explore more.

Hiria, In the Margins, A Visit to San Sibilia: I mentioned earlier that I like the notion of exploring weird cities, right? Well, here's two games about that, and a cool bookmark RPG for reading. I listened to San Sibilia played in an episode of Friends at the Table, and it really captured my attention. The questions were fascinating, and they let the players flesh out a city we'd only heard of, but not seen prior to that game. It was a cool coda on a really fantastic and weird season, Sangfielle.

Grandmothership: The title alone had me, but Armanda Haller is a creator I keep an eye on, because she makes really rad stuff. This caught my attention because solving mysteries in a weird, Mothership-esque sci-fi setting, as nosy grandmothers, really just, gets me. I want to do that. I want to live that.

Holdfast Station: I've been watching Stonetop develop through its email updates. It's another PbtA game, but with a robust city-building and city development core loop that, is 100% my jam. (Low-key, one of my favorite games is Dragon Quest Builders 2.) This game takes that concept to space, which is 1000% my jam, in fact.

Spectres of Brocken: Aaron Lim is a designer I got into early on in my foray into games, and I do love Mech Anime. I am eager to see his take on Mech Anime, and I am really intrigued by the way this game handles playsets and worldbuilding as part of the game itself. Really can't wait to dive into this.

Lay on Hands: This is another of those games I've heard about, but never actually checked out. I know Alfred Valley better by reputation than by direct experience, but this is one of those games I hear people constantly telling people to check out. So, I'm gonna!

Penumbra City: Maybe 5 years ago, I read a novella by Margaret Killjoy about anarchists living in an abandoned city, and beset by assholes within their community, and supernatural horrors from without. The world kinda stuck with me, so when I saw she was working on an RPG not in the same world), I was curious to see what that would look like. I haven't cracked Penumbra City open yet, but I'm jazzed to do so.

These two fell off the pile for the big photo, so I forgot:

Deathmatch Island: I enjoyed the Hunger Games and Battle Royale movies a pretty moderate amount, but what really caught my attention here was the promise that players could also break the Reality TV Parody. The use of the Paragon system also caught my attention. After hearing one AP of Agon, I really wanted to see how that would translate into this, and it didn't take me too long reading it to go "Oh, okay, this rules."

Our God is Dead: What if you were a paladin or priest of a faith, and you found out your god was dead? What if you also had like, a bunch of people who really needed that god not to be dead, like this weekend? This sounds hilarious, and I am going to insert it into conversation often to see if people want to play it. Apologies to people who know me.

Eagle eyed viewers may have noticed a second Mothership box. What's that about?

It's a storage box for all my Mothership Zines so far... Except the two that are just slightly too big!

And, some fun comics/graphic novels:

Good Boy Paws: A friend of mine in comics put this together, and it looked extremely cute. A sweet tale of a good boi.

Wine Ghost Goes to Hell: Picked this up because the creator had contributed to Bugsnax, which is a game I enjoyed, and the concept seemed fun. Will have to check it out and report back!

#indie ttrpg #ttrpg #indie ttrpgs #indie comics #crowdfund haul report

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penname-artist · 6 months

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Merry Chrysler-

I MEANT TO POST THESE CHRISTMAS HEADCANONS A YEAR AGO

THIS HAS BEEN IN MY DRAFTS SINCE THEN

I'M SORRY CHILDREN YOU CAN HAVE YOUR CANDY NOW

I swear I am totally not biased when I say that I'll side with Shu's headcanon of Lightning being very into singing and then getting caught doing so and being good at doing so while putting up Christmas decorations. Okay. Maybe a LITTLE bit biased.

But I am NOT biased when I say that he and Mater BOTH do it and they have a habit of starting a lyric and waiting for the other to give them the next one so they can duet the rest. It's adorable, but it drives the town crazy just as much.

Red always puts something happy and festive on the old Stanley statue. Some years it's a wreath. Some years he has a red glowing nose. Sometimes he gets little antlers. It's a nice nod to his love for the holidays, and it makes Lizzie so happy.

Finn and Leland used to play that silly Hide the Pickle game on Christmas morning, except with very ramped up stakes because they loved a challenge. Since his passing, Finn's now dangerously taught both Mater and Holley to play. Mater tries his best, though he's not great at hiding them and he's lucky at best with finding, and Holley, well...let's just say that she did such a good job her first time trying to hide it that they all gave up looking, and ended up having to buy another one to use.

Every year, Dusty goes out and puts up tacky Christmas lights for the year. And every year, he and Chug get tangled in it. And every year until 2013, Dottie was tasked with helping them out. Since 2013, every year she puts it up to Skipper and Sparky to do instead. Never fails.

You ever heard of something called a "Drive thru nativity scene"? I've been to one, once. You sit in your car and drive through a live reenactment of the towns and the nativity, and you pay fake coin taxes at certain stops, and dad almost got put in fake jail by Roman soldiers because he wouldn't pay those taxes anyways the point is they have one that they do at Radiator Springs now and over the years they have garnered a lot of traffic. Sally and Lightning only did the Mary and Joseph bit one year, and it ended in Joseph being run over by fans and backing up the line, so he lent his role to someone else (it changes every year)

During his reign over the Lodge, Cad Spinner went above and beyond for Christmas light displays during the holidays, which ate up the electric bill for one and left a fire hazard for another. When Jammer took over his position, though, the annual display had become wildly popular, so - with the assistance and better pay of the Piston Peak fire and rescue - they kept the event running. So long as Ryker stayed close by.

The Smokejumpers pulled an Epic Christmas Prank on - or rather with - Cabbie one year. He had no idea what everyone was giggling about, as they boarded up to drop over a fire. And then later, Maru held up a photo he got of him while he was taking off with them. He rolled his eyes at the sight of the bright red "ELF BACKUP" sign written across his hatch.

Blade's not really a Christmas guy, but, there's one thing he enjoys during the Christmas season, and that's peppermints. He's fucking addicted. Maru will catch him swiping them from the little bowl Patch puts out in the mess hall, and they go through a whole bag in less than two weeks. Addicted I tell you.

Specifically in humanized land, Cabbie has whittled - while Windlifter paints - simplified wooden nutcracker statues, reflecting the features of each of the Smokejumpers. There's five on the mantle in the mess hall for them, and another shelf that holds a handful more for the jumpers past.

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d1xonss · 6 months

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Desert Rose

Chapter 1 ~ Introductions

✧ Pairing : Daryl Dixon x Rose

✧ Era : Season 1

✧ Word Count : 4.2k

In this chapter ~ In a life full of unexpected turns, this one by far hit Rose the hardest. A disease begins to spread when the dead are somehow brought back to life, that alone being the tip of the iceberg of what she remains to be faced with. When it all leads to her fighting for her life in Atlanta, she meets a group that ends up saving her from what she thought was the end of her rope. But when they bring her along for their great escape out of the dead infested city, she's faced with a decision that seemed to be more difficult than she first realized.

AN ~ Hi! So this is my very first post and series on tumblr and I’m still very much trying to get the feel of things lol. I originally uploaded the first two seasons of this fanfiction to wattpad and am still uploading frequently there, but I also wanted to give this a try as well. Just putting it on a different platform for more people to see:)

I will admit before you read, I started writing this story a little while ago so the phrasing and writing might be a little rusty at first seeing as I was just starting out. But I promise it gets better as it goes on, trust me! I hope whoever reads this grows to love it as much as I do. I will be uploading here as much as I can and adjusting to the new feel of things on here as quick as I can.

And I think that’s all for now! I hope you enjoy!

Fear.

That's the only emotion anyone ever feels anymore, or that's at least what I believe. Considering I've been on my own since the beginning, fear is something that I've had to grow accustomed to. And the world going to shit only made me realize how alone I truly was. Sure, I had a family but ever since I grew up and left them completely, I've never liked to talk about them much, mostly because they didn't care about me whatsoever. I mean, I'm on my own for a reason.

But I knew how to take care of myself pretty well and I was always silently thankful for that. I couldn't imagine living in this world and not knowing how to fight, or fend for yourself, so I considered myself lucky. I caught on quickly when it came time to start killing the dead, the very first time I had taken one out still haunts me to this day, the first feeling of fear I had felt in a very long time. I've learned the hard way that you never quite shake the feeling.

I had a day off from work, which was rare, and I was just in my apartment painting while the T.V. played quietly in the background. But then the whole atmosphere changed, nearly in a split second it felt like. My ears instantly perked up when I heard blood curdling screams coming from the hallway just outside, instantly sending me flying to the front door to press my ear up against the surface. Though when the screams didn't die down, I slowly opened my door to see two disgusting looking corpses going after a few of my neighbors. I froze at the scene in front of me.

They were trying to fight them off with random weapons clutched tightly in their hands, flinching away as they tried desperately to push them back, screaming in utter terror. A part of me was torn, not wanting to step in and actually kill these things that looked exactly like us. People. But these things were no longer human, anyone could see that from a mile away.

I snapped back into reality and rushed into my apartment to grab a large steak knife from my kitchen drawer, trying to help them kill whatever the hell these things were. Rushing into the hallway, I shoved the thing up against the wall to get it away from the small group that had formed around it, causing it to growl loudly as it looked directly at me. Goosebumps formed on my skin at the sight, quickly twirling the knife around to stab it in the chest, but it continued to flail around in my grasp. My eyes widened as the thing didn't seem the least bit phased, trying again and again desperately to get its clawing hands away from me.

But finally it a fit of aggravation, I took my knife and stabbed it right in between its eyes, silencing it completely as it fell limp out of my hold and onto the carpeted floor. My breathing was heavy as the others continued to panic loudly from just behind my head, but I stayed completely still as I couldn't take my eyes away from the thing. I felt disgusting, horrified, and clueless all at once. Though one thing I did know was that I couldn't stay here.

I didn't hesitate then to storm back into my home and pack a larger bag full of my stuff to evacuate, knowing that this couldn't have just been happening here. Curiosity got the better of me as I flipped through the T.V. channels quickly, landing on the news which showed utter chaos and live footage of these things attacking more people. My heart seemed to stop for a moment as I watched, seeing that the world was nearly coming to an end as tanks were flooding down the streets, trying to take these things out and put an end to it before it spread.

I didn't know what to do, or where I would go, but I wanted to get as far away from here as possible. Looking into the dead eyes of the monster really didn't sit too well with me.

Though after that day, life was never the same. The dead slowly took over everything, killing off anyone they could get a hold of and silencing the world completely. Leaving everyone left alive utterly terrified and alone.

Two whole months had passed since the dreaded outbreak, and I found myself to be moving constantly. Never staying in the same place for too long, before packing up to move on and stay alive. That's truly all that mattered anymore.

I somehow ended up in the city of Atlanta just passing through the large structures hoping to gather some supplies before moving on all over again. But what I didn't expect was to see hundreds of walkers filling the streets instead. My eyes widened at the sight as soon as I turned the corner, hoping to just silently slip away as I backed up from the giant swarm of them. But a few of their heads turned as they somehow spotted me, and then the "few" turned into a shit ton.

I practically sprinted in the other direction as fast as I could, slipping in between a few buildings to try and escape the many that chased me with outstretched hands. But I quickly realized that the space I ran into was an alley, blocking off the other side in which I planned to escape. My stomach flipped as I slowly turned back around to face the dead, seeming to accept my fate as I was trapped and had no escape.

And that brings me to today. No, I didn't die...but if I'm being honest a part of me wished that I had.

Instead of feeling the corpse's dead fingers tearing into me, a few live people came out of nowhere in the tall building to my right and began killing off the corpses one by one, right before my eyes. I stood completely still as I thought at first I might be dreaming, but one of the men quickly grabbing my arm and pulling me along like a rag doll told me it was far from that.

Anyone else would be grateful for these people being at the right place at the right time, but I didn't work too well with others so grateful isn't really the word I would use.

So, currently you could say I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place as I racked my brain, trying to figure out how to get out of the situation I was put in. One of the men that had saved me was wearing a God awful hat that made me want to walk back in the herd of walkers. His name, I learned, was Rick Grimes and he and his group were the ones that helped me get out of the pickle I got myself in, along with dragging me with them as they too escaped from the large city of Atlanta. From what I overheard the others talking loudly about, they had just managed to save Rick as well, who was having just as bad of a day as I was, an hour before they saved me. To me it looked like we were both just random strangers that they decided to pick up like lost dogs.

The rest of the group seemed to be nice enough, except for this asshole Merle who was this racist, sexist, piece of shit. Spewing out bullshit and insults from his lips every five minutes and only pushing me further into wanting to walk towards the flesh eating monsters. Though, to make a very long story short, we ended up leaving him handcuffed up on the roof of a building where we were once trapped on top of. Though much to my surprise, it wasn't on purpose. Rick eventually had enough of the man's bullshit and took his fancy, shiny handcuffs to lock him in place on a metal pole, and a man named T-Dog accidentally dropped the key to unlock him down a drain.

But when the time came, we had no choice but to leave him when the dead were chasing us once more as they somehow had gotten into the building. The only option we really had now was to maybe go back for him later. Maybe. But to put it into perspective on how uncomfortable I was with these people, riding in this truck with them to their camp...I would rather switch places with Merle.

I was suddenly pulled out of my thoughts when the truck we were riding in stopped abruptly, assuming we were at the camp these people were talking so much about. I took a second to lean forward and glance out the windshield at my surroundings, not liking the feeling that was forming in my gut at the thought of meeting anyone new. But Rick caught me scanning the area, reading my expression from where he sat in the passenger seat and clearly sensed my nerves.

He eventually caught my eye as I felt him staring right as he began to speak, "Don't worry, we're in this together." he assured, flashing a half smile at me that made the corners of his eyes wrinkle.

I raised my eyebrows. Oh, thank God we're "in this together."

The guy who was driving, who I learned was named Morales, told us to come out and meet everyone with a nod as he jumped out of the truck to run to his family. I shared another uneasy look with Rick before slowly following his actions to see for myself what I would be dealing with. My eyes scanned through everyone that was gathered around and instantly all eyes were on me once they heard my door slam shut. I grew uncomfortable at all the watchful eyes boring holes straight into my forehead, and a man named Glenn eventually stepped up when he sensed the obvious tension.

"Guys, this is Rosaline. We saved her back in the city. She's cool." he assured with a smile, silently telling all of them to back off.

I shifted uncomfortably, "Rose." I corrected.

It seemed after I opened my mouth to speak everyone relaxed slightly, thinking that I wouldn't be much of a threat. Though I could be. But they didn't need to know that. I didn't plan on hurting these people or taking their fishing poles unless they tried anything. But by the looks of it, some of these people looked like they wouldn't even kill a fly, so I think it was safe to say I was good.

Though all of a sudden, the whole atmosphere seemed to change, everything happening in slow motion as a few people stared at me wide eyed. A man, a woman, and a kid. I stood still there for a moment wondering what I did to make these people stare daggers at me like this until I heard a small gasp from behind me. I looked over my shoulder and saw Rick standing there in awe with the same expression that they had as he stared at them in disbelief. I soon realized that they were looking just behind me the entire time and quickly stepped off to the side as fast as I could.

Well, that's fucking embarrassing.

The little boy then took off in a flash towards Rick, screaming "Dad!" as he cried and then it all seemed to click in my head. This was the family Rick briefly mentioned to the group back when we were on the roof of the tall building back in the city. The family he had been trying desperately to find. They had been here the whole time.

My eyes stayed on the small family as they reunited with laughter and tears, almost feeling myself smile at the sight. Though I snapped out of it with a shake of my head, stopping it before I could let it happen.

After the moment had passed, that only came time for very long and boring introductions as Rick and I seemed to meet everyone else in the camp. I nodded towards everyone politely as I learned each of their names that I would surely accidentally forget. But one name seemed to really stick out to me amongst the many others.

Someone briefly mentioned that there was another man who lived with them, one who wasn't here at the time. Merle's brother, Daryl. And here I thought one was enough.

However, I had yet to meet the second one because the older man, Dale informed me he was currently out on a hunt somewhere in the woods just ahead of us. But the truth was I didn't need to meet the man to know that he was an asshole just like the one we left behind. I mean they are related after all.

The entire group then sat around a fire once the sun finally set, eating something small they cooked for the night, while discussing some random things that people would occasionally bring up. But the hot topic currently, was what needed to be said to Daryl once he got back. In my mind it was pretty simple, but it was clear these people didn't want to be too harsh about it.

"What should we say to him?" Dale asked.

"We tell him the truth," Rick stated simply, "I'll tell him, I mean I was the one who cuffed him."

"No, I'll tell him I'm the one who dropped the key." T-Dog piped in as he finished the remaining food on his plate.

Glenn sighed and went on to say, "I don't mean to bring race into this but...it might sound better coming from a white guy."

I couldn't help but roll my eyes hearing them going back and forth about what to tell him, hearing the same things being said over and over again. I stayed completely silent as I thought more to myself, slowly tuning their conversation out as I planned my escape from this hell hole. Coming here was clearly a big mistake and I realized that the moment I stepped foot inside, I didn't belong with the rest of them. I was better off alone.

And what seemed to annoy me the most is that I didn't have a choice, they just dragged me back here without even asking, without a care in the world. To me, that alone was a good enough reason to get the fuck out of here.

The group finally decided after what felt like hours that Rick would be the one to tell Daryl about his brother, and eventually it grew much later in the night as everyone began to go their separate ways. I planned to just head off into the forest to sleep against a nearby tree for a few hours, then slip away in the early morning before any of them had a chance to notice.

I began to gather my stuff, strapping my backpack across my shoulders and stepping over the few large rocks in my way to head towards the tree line. But just as I was about to get the smallest taste of freedom, a voice calling out behind me caused me to stop.

"Hey Rose!" I recognized Dale's voice softly shout.

My chest raised up and down with a deep sigh, turning around to face him as I looked at him expectantly. "I know you don't have a place to sleep tonight, but we have some room in the RV..." he trailed off.

I continued to stare at him, hardly showing any emotion on my face at all as I tried to read him, figuring out what his intentions were.

He continued, "Look, I know you're new and clearly don't trust any of us just yet, but I just want to make sure you have a safe place to sleep. You don't have to, I just thought I would offer." he said, finishing with a smile.

I could tell by that alone that Dale was a good person and a decent man. There were definitely some people in this group that gave me a bad feeling right off the bat, but Dale wasn't one of them. But I needed to get away so I could leave. I only wanted this group to be a distant memory in the back of my mind and nothing more.

So, with that I shook my head, "I'm okay." I said as politely as I could before heading off into the forest.

I could hear him sigh from behind me as I walked away but I didn't let it bother me. I needed to go. A part of me didn't even want to sleep so I could get a head start and further away, but I was fairly tired from running for my life throughout the day. So I figured I could sleep for a couple of hours and before anyone could wake up, I would leave and head off to...well anywhere but here.

My eyes groggily peeled open the following morning just before the sun began to rise over the hills, looking at it made me guess was it was around four in the morning. I yawned and stretched slowly before standing up to my full height and placing my bag on my back, starting to head off in the opposite direction of the camp as the dirt crunched loudly beneath my feet. Although I didn't get very far, maybe about five steps away before something suddenly stopped me in my tracks. I stood still there for a minute, just thinking. For some reason there was a gut feeling I had. Something was telling me to stay.

My mind started to spiral with many different thoughts, enough to give you a headache, but then that's where I stopped myself. My whole life whenever I had a gut feeling about something, I needed to trust it. My little intuition was almost never wrong. And although most I had felt like warnings about uneasy feelings, this one was different. Like a magnet was pulling me back to the group. A strong ass magnet.

I found myself plopping back down on my ass, my back up against the tree with my knees to my chest, just lost in my own thoughts, debating and arguing with myself for what felt like hours when in reality it was probably only a few minutes. But a golden flicker appearing out of the corner of my eye is what made me look back up, seeing the sun beginning to rise higher in the sky enough to kiss my cheeks. Okay...so it really had been a few hours.

But even after clear hours had passed me by, I was still left very torn on what to do with myself. My head was screaming at me to just leave and be on my own, but my heart was just calmly telling me to stay for a while and see how it works out. I hadn't had a real group at all since the outbreak first happened, but in my mind I never wished for one. I always believed it was okay to be alone, watching out for yourself rather than anyone else dragging you down. That was the logical way to survive...wasn't it?

With that I let out an annoyed groan and slowly stood back up to make my walk of shame back to the camp, deciding to give it one more day and if nothing changes, I'd leave tonight. To me even staying one more day seemed to be pushing it, but I didn't want to regret not trying and seeing how this would play out.

As I walked back into the grounds, I noticed some people were already awake in the early hours of the morning to my surprise. Carol and her daughter Sophia were sitting up on one of the logs talking quietly to each other, the woman's gaze glancing up to me as she noticed my movement. She sent me a sweet smile with a small wave, to which I nodded to her in return.

My eyes then looked away from her for a split second when I caught a brief glimpse of Rick walking away from the campsite with a certain determination in his step, and his head low. I stayed in place as I watched his figure disappear, before I found my feet slowly moving forward to follow him. I didn't know why I did, I just grew curious I guess.

When I caught up to his long strides, I found him sitting on a larger rock, seemingly talking to himself though I couldn't make out the words from where I was standing. It was all too hushed and quiet. But then my eyes panned over a bit to see a device in his hands, his mouth lowering closer as he spoke into it. Good to know he wasn't batshit crazy or anything.

After an only few seconds I turned on my heel to leave him be, though I accidentally stepped too far to the right and straight down on a branch that snapped loudly. My eyes closed the second it happened, silently cursing to myself. When he heard the noise he whipped his head around, with his hand hovering over his pistol on his hip, but his body instantly relaxed when he realized I wasn't a walking corpse.

He then recovered and flashed me a thin lipped smile, "Hey, you're up early."

I lifted my hand to check my imaginary watch, "No shit." I said, lowering it back down again at my side.

"You're not a morning person...noted." he said slowly before sighing to himself as he stared at me, "You know, I can tell you were alone for quite some time, if not the entire time. And I know you're probably scared but-"

"I'm not scared of anything." I snapped.

He looked at me surprised with raised brows, not expecting me to say anything at all. But I wasn't going to just stand there while he accused me of the things I was feeling when he didn't know anything about me at all. Everyone around here might've been scared but I sure as hell wasn't. Maybe that was another reason I didn't want to be with this group, they didn't know what the hell they were doing, too scared to have a steady head on their shoulders. I should add that to the list of reasons why I should take my happy ass out of here.

Once he recovered, he nodded in agreement to my surprise, "Okay, maybe you're not scared... but you are alone."

I didn't open my mouth to respond as my eyes narrowed at him further. Thanks captain obvious.

He continued, "Look, I know you don't trust us, but all I'm asking for is that you give us a chance. I saw the way you were looking at everyone last night, like you were ready to pounce any minute if anyone tried anything. I can tell you need us as much as we need you-"

"Okay," I interrupted with a wave of my hand, "Let me stop you right there before you break out into song and dance. I'm going to make something perfectly clear. I don't need you, or your parade of assholes back there for anything. I have always been just fine on my own, and last time I checked I didn't even ask for you to save me and bring me back here. You just did it. So don't tell me I'm scared, or I need any of you because that is far from the truth, asshole." I spoke harshly.

He stared at me for a few seconds not knowing what to say, but clapping back quicker than I expected, "Okay, fair enough. You're right I don't know you, you didn't ask me to save you, and you don't look like you need anyone. I'm just saying it's nice to have other people watching your back. I felt so alone until I found a man and his son while looking for my family, and now I can be a part of this group...and so can you. But I can understand if you want to leave. Just know that...everyone in camp likes the idea of having you around."

His response was far from what I expected, and I didn't say anything back to him right away, mostly because I couldn't find the right words. How could he be so understanding over someone he didn't even know. It honestly blew my mind a little.

When he saw I wasn't going to argue further, he turned back around to watch the sun continue to rise in front of him. And after debating in my head for a minute or two, I decided to walk over and sit next myself to him on the giant rock. He glanced at me when I sat down, probably expecting me to say some smart ass comment in return to what he stated, but I didn't. We just sat in comfortable silence until the sky was no longer orange and pink, but now turning into more of a pale blue with clouds slowly filling up the remaining space. It was somewhat nice.

I could tell he was about to move and stand up to his feet, probably to head back to camp, but I said something that stopped him.

"I never wanted to be alone." I confessed, not taking my eyes off the sky.

As soon as the words left my lips, I closed my eyes for a moment as I regretted what I said almost instantly. I didn't want to admit defeat to anyone let alone a stranger, but I figured I should in this case for him to truly understand what I was feeling.

I felt his eyes on me as he said nothing, expecting me to continue, so I did. "I was alone before the world went to shit, and I've gotten used to being by myself. I guess I've just come to realize it's exhausting looking out for other people."

He still remained silent.

"My point is I don't know if I'm staying." I said while finally turning to look at him.

He nodded, "That's okay. Just make sure to think about it before you make any rash decisions. Who knows...maybe you'll change your mind." he said almost suggestively before standing up and turning around to head back.

I turned my head and watched his frame retreat away from me for a few seconds, his words echoing in my mind, before turning all my attention back to the sky. A part of me still wanted to leave, the fear of the unknown creeping up to me, however I did tell myself that I would give it another chance. But if I couldn't find a reason to say by tonight that was that. I would leave this group behind.

~ Thanks for reading!

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atinyjules · 1 year

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This is my first time requesting for a Kdrama character. So I want some Lee rang x human reader in the modern time from 1st season. Where reader is a highschool or a uni student. Shes a bit introverted but she can be quite fun too.So how'd they meet and all?

UNDERSTAND - LEE RANG

Ofc! That'd be great! It's like 1 am in the morning right now but I stayed awake hoping someone would request a fic-🤧

Okay so my creative juices are working really good right now! So let's get started!

Thank you for Requesting (´∀｀)♡

Genre: Fluff, romance, strangers to friends to lovers trope, fantasy au, humor.

Pairings: Lee Rang x Human!reader (named)

Warnings: Swearing, violence, mentions of death, blood and Rang just being a misunderstood half demon who just wants to be loved.

Crap.

That's what you felt like as a second year uni student trying to survive the harsh summer heat with two assignments due in two days and continuous tests for the next 4 days. On top of that you were two months behind on paying your rent and one last warning away before you're eventually kicked out of your apartment. But what did you expect?

As an orphan who had no financial or emotional support, you had to support yourself but even after working three jobs a day it still barely covered your tuition fees for a year. Life was hard but you didn't have a choice. These days people looked for employees with excellent social skills and unfortunately being an introvert, speaking and conversing with clients was not your forte.

Which brings us to your second job of the day at a skincare boutique.

Noeul's

"Thank you for you're purchase ma'am, please come again." I said politely as my customer left, smile falling to a frown almost immediately.

"No amount of skincare products will fix that prideful ugly hag's face." I muttered under my breath as I took a deep breath in and looked at my reflection in the mirror.

"Gosh my face looks so tired and exhausted...don't tell me I've been tending to customers like this..." I mumbled as I took a break to freshen myself up.

As I fixed my makeup in the wash room I couldn't help but eavesdrop at my colleagues conversation.

"I heard that your boyfriend proposed!"

"Yes, he did! See!" she exclaimed flaunting her engagement ring.

I let out a sigh internally as their voices started fading away and my thoughts took my attention.

Everyone I know have their lives all figured out and here I am a broke uni student who could get evicted by next week.

I sighed as I felt my emotions skyrocket through the roof and finally crack as I felt my tears pour out after keeping everything bottled up inside me for a month. Fortunately there was no one in the wash room at that moment but I was sure that my colleagues were out gosipping about my melt down. But nonetheless I cried my heart out and by the time I came out my shift had already ended so I went towards the changing room to get out of my uncomfortable uniform.

As I made my way towards the changing room I couldn't help but stop and look at the commotion that was happening in the perfume aisle. I came infront to see a man in a red suit holding another man up in the air with his hands wrapped around his neck as the victim suffocated.

"Aish, people can't mind their own business these days can they?" he said as his eyes connected with mine and he scanned me from top to bottom.

"You work here?" he asked me as I nodded and he threw two perfume bottles towards me. Luckily I caught it and cleared my throat.

"Should I pack it for you, sir?" I asked as he nodded.

"Pack them separately while you're at it yeah?" he asked as I nodded and bowed lightly.

After I was done packing the perfumes he payed for it and took the bags but instead of leaving he leaned at the counter and brought his lips to my ears making me flustered as his warm breath fanned my skin.

"Switch the power off and get under the table when I tell you to...alright? Cause it'd be a shame if you die." he whispered, catching me off guard as I nodded.

He then turned towards the entrance door and locked it, turning around with a menacing smirk as he closed the blinds and put the perfumes in a corner.

"On the count of three." he said and looked at me with a smirk as I grazed my fingers over the switch.

"Three" he said and walked towards the sample section.

"Two....one." he said and I switched off the power and quickly got under the table. And just as I did a string of gunshots and screams began, all I could hear other than those noises were the sounds of furniture breaking and bodies being thrown around. Out of fear I covered my ears and screamed as a body suddenly collided to the table next to the one I was taking shelter in.

"There you are, come on." the man from before said and propped me up on my feet almost immediately and pulled me out of the store with the perfume in his hand.

"W-What are you?" I asked after I saw many bodies splayed across the destroyed boutique.

"Your knight in shining armour." he said and turned to look at me with a smirk as I gasped at the sight of his golden eye.

"W-Wait-" he cut me off my pulling me into an alleyway.

"Keep yourself out of trouble, let's meet again. But until then, try not to die." he said and handed me one of the perfume bottle and a bag.

"They have a really strong sense of smell so I suggest you change your clothes and spritz on a lot of this " he said and smirked at me and walked away.

"What just-wait!" I ran out of the alleyway towards the way he walked to only to see an empty street making me gasp as I quickly ran to the nearest public washroom and did as he said.

"Are these his clothes?" I asked myself as I wore the oversized sweater and shorts that were in the bag. After that I spritz a large amount of the perfume on myself and made my way home.

Two days later I found myself at the park eating a watermelon popsicle, watching as the kids played in the water sprinklers. I smiled and chuckled as I watched them intently wishing I could go back to my younger years at the orphanage I grew up in. Even though I wasn't adopted, my life in the orphanage was quite nice...we had a nice headmistress, good food, loving care takers and a comfortable and safe place to live in. I sighed as I finished up my popsicle, grinning when it read two free popsicles.

"Ah, you're alive." I looked up to see the guy from monday causing me to shriek and flinch.

"Y-You!" I exclaimed as he smirked and sat next to me on the bench.

"Oh, you won." he said looking at my popsicle stick.

As we ate our popsicle, I couldn't help but stare at him.

He was definitely handsome, without a doubt and strong...really strong which brought me to the conclusion that he probably was either not a human or an incredibly strong human, my bet was on the first choice as the grandma who would make our meals when I was little told me that spirits and demons of sorts existed among us.

"If you keep staring at me you're popsicle will melt." he said making me turn a dark shade of red as I quickly chewed my popsicle causing me to have extreme brain freeze.

"Ahhh-" I groaned and clutched my head as he looked at me with amused eyes.

"I've met a lot of humans but you must be the most interesting and amusing one yet." he said as I froze and looked at him with wide eyes.

"Humans? Does that mean..." I trailed as he looked at the bed of roses.

"You like flowers?" he asked me and before I could even respond he already had a bouquet of roses in his hand.

"Take these as a gift for helping me out that day." he said as I looked at the roses.

"I don't take flowers from a stranger." I mumbled as he chuckled.

"I like your personality, the name's Lee Rang but just call me Rang." he said as I looked at him and smiled softly.

"I'm Kang Noeul." I said and accepted the flowers as he stood up.

"Nice name, it suits you." he said as he put on his shades and brought his hand forward.

"Friends?" he asked as I nodded and shook his hand and once again in the blink of an eye he propped me up to my feet.

"A fox always repays kindness, so tell me what you want...anything you wish for I'll get it for you." He said as I thought for a while.

"I don't have friends so...can you be my friend ? Like, a real friend not just for the sake of repaying my kindness but my real friend?" I asked as he chuckled and ruffled my hair.

"I'm not one for befriending humans seriously, but you're an exception." he said and walked in front of me and stopped.

"Are you just gonna stand there? Come on, we have places to be." he said as I furrowed my brows.

"Where?" I asked not realising that the next few months would be filled with me regretting my decisions.

"Who's car was that?!" I exclaimed referring to the car we just trashed as we ran away.

"My elder brother's." he said completely chill as I gasped.

"The one who abandoned you?!" I exclaimed as I picked up my speed.

"Why are you running so fast?" he asked as I continued sprinting.

"I don't want to die in the hands of a pure Gumiho...if you, a half gumiho are that strong I can't imagine how strong he'll be." I said as he held my hand and stopped me.

"Who said I'd let him kill you hm?" he said as he started walking us in a slow pace.

I've been friends with Rang who is not only a Gumiho but also my roommate for about 2 and a half months now...and everyday is filled with us getting in bizarre adventures or causing mischief. Being friends with him somehow unlocked a new version of my self that I wasn't aware I had while still being myself.

Having him in my life not only changed my life but also my feelings for him compared to when we had first met. Sure he was bad, he did bad things and had a long standing grudge on his elder brother who he was currently planning on getting revenge from but nonetheless he made me feel safe, protected and loved...something I haven't felt in years.

"You'd be willing to protect me?" I asked, completely surprised as he scoffed.

"We've been living with each other for than two months and that was enough for me to know that you can't live without me." he said with a smug expression, he isn't completely wrong though.

"Yeah, yeah." I said as he suddenly sat down in a bench and left me standing as he made me stand between his legs and wrapped his arms around my waist and burried his face in my waist.

"You won't...abandon me too will you?" he asked through the fabric of my sweater, catching me off guard.

"Why would you think that?" I asked as he held me tighter.

"My intentions aren't good...I only want revenge and bloodshed." he said as I sighed and ran my fingers through his hair.

"Maybe you're not as good as most people but for me it doesn't matter...I won't make fun of you for that...nor will I judge. But I just want you to know that I won't abandon you and I hope that you won't abandon me too." I said as he chuckled.

"Never, you have my word." he said as I took a deep breath.

"Rang?...can I tell you something?" I asked as he smiled and kissed my forehead.

"I love you too idiot...I can assure you that cause a fox always stays loyal to his mate." he said catching me off guard.

"How did you know?" I asked as he pulled me into a real hug.

"You weren't good at hiding your feelings, I saw and felt the love you have for me enough to entrust you with my heart, I love You Kang Noeul." he said and leaned in making me close my eyes as he pressed a soft yet loving kiss to my lips under the orange skies created by the sun's rays as it set.

"I love you too, Rang-ah."

"Never thought that I'd find

That the one in my life would be so near

And now you're here

I got you, you got me

When it's us, babe, you make me feel complete

You're all I need."

_______________________

I am so sorry if the story doesn't reach your expectations but I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it ♡♡♡

Thank you for reading♡

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