#aroace validation

[converse-and-mnms]

there’s nothing more validating as an aro ace than listening to my very allo bestie talking abt her “love” life.

we’re in university, so it’s…. way too in depth for my liking and i spend my time switching between feeling validated and horrified

#like girl #why would u do that #why would u think that #are u okay #wtf #aroace validation #allo culture #asexual #aromantic #aroace #lgbtq+ #lgbtqia #validation

[dollopheadsandclotpoles]

Saw a reddit post today about a girl who was upset that her childhood best friend replaced a photo of the two of them in his wallet with one of him and his girlfriend. And while yeah, she was being unreasonable with a lot of what she was saying, I totally understand the sadness of a friend "replacing" you with someone they have romantic feelings for. Makes it worse when the top comment is this

Every single comment on this post is about how family and romantic relationships always take precedence over friendships. I don't have anything more to say to this aside from the fact that... this is why it's hard for aroaces to imagine futures for themselves. Society drills it into your head that you're going to live in a world where you are no one's priority if you don't have romantic relationships and it fucking sucks

#you know what's validating though #Daniel Sloss's bit on his best girl friend... the STARK opposite of this #aro stuff #ace stuff #aroace tag #aromantic #asexual #aroace #aro #ace #asexuality #aromanticism #i feel like I ought to add more and make this like a powerful essay #but it's too late rn i'm too tired

[yagikidd57]

#tw acephobia #tw aphobia #lgbtqia+ #asexuality #asexual #asexuality is valid #ace community #ace space #lgbtqia community #queer community #queer #aroace #aromantic #asexual struggles #aspec #arospec

[redysetdare]

The response to "ace people are just virgins who can't get laid!" Shouldn't be "ace people can still have sex!" but instead " being a virgin isn't a bad thing."

The response to "aro people are just heartless freaks!" Shouldn't be "aro people can still feel love!" And instead be "not feeling love or other emotions doesn't make you a bad person."

Instead of pushing the idea that aspec people can be "normal like allos" we should instead be trying to normalize aspec experiences. Yes aspec people can be normal because aspec identities are normal. Some aros fall in love. some aces have sex. but they should not be the only valid aspec experiences. We should not use these experiences to make the aspec identity more palatable to amatonormativity and allos.

#text #aro #ace #aroace #aromantic #asexual #aspec #acespec #arospec #ik i made a similar post to this recently but i feel this one better words what i wanted to say with that one #ill leave the other posted but heres a more worded version ig #basically stop theowing repulsed and non partnering ppl under the bus #dont only validate favorable and partnering experiences when fighting aphobia #we are here too

[why-am-i-always-hungruy]

reblog if you're aspec and FUCKING VALID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#aspec #asexual #aromantic #aroace #whatever the fuck because YOURE VALID MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!!!!!

[theartisticcrow]

On this fine day, at 8:37 AM, I walked outside to the front of my school and saw that they replaced the Canadian flag, the flag of our country, with a Pride flag. I have never felt happier. I have never laughed so hard in my life. This is in not a complaint, I just think it's very funny that they replaced the Canadian flag with a Pride flag for no apparent reason. They have their priorities figured out.

#lgbtq+ #lgbtq #lgbtqia #queer #lgbtq+ rights #gay #bisexual #pansexual #lesbian #aromantic #asexual #aroace #trans #transgender #ace #aro #trans rights #genderfluid #polyamourous #bigender #aspec #nonbinary #enby #intersex #agender #i'm tagging with all the queer identities i can think of because everyone deserves to see this #YOU ARE ALL VALID #genderqueer #abrosexual #omnisexual

[pikp0kcas3]

The Hazbin Hotel fandom’s issue with accepting aromanticism and asexuality

Now that it is officially Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week, I want to talk about this!

I find that, as an aroace myself, I am constantly grasping at good representation and coming up empty— it usually ends up in one of two ways.

One: the character is portrayed as emotionless, cold, and robotic in nature. It’s the question aromantic and/or asexual people are often asked: “Are you heartless?” The answer is no, of course, but general media makes it out to be the opposite.

Or two: Their lack of attraction is seen as something to “fix” because they “haven’t found the right one yet”, and they end up with a partner as a “happy ending”.

It frustrates me greatly because of how little people actually see aromanticism or asexuality as a true part of the LGBTQIA+ community.

So when I watched Hazbin Hotel, and I found out about Alastor being aroace, I was over the moon. I was on cloud nine. I also saw how his voice actor has looked up the term as an attempt to learn about aroaces, which makes me OVERJOYED?? Amir is truly a blessing, and I love that he’s proud to embody a character that’s part of our community. It’s so beautiful to finally have a proper character, a fan favorite at that, who just so happens to be aroace— and that’s another thing I love about this.

It’s never explicitly stated in the show (though it is stated in interviews), but it’s rather clear when you’re watching, isn’t it? Alastor’s aversion to any sort of sexual advancement, coupled with Rosie’s blatant “I know you’re an ace in the hole” comment sort of spell out his asexuality pretty clearly, as well as what side of the spectrum he falls upon. In addition, his Valentine’s day card was strictly platonic, which caters to his aromantic side. It feels so validating to finally be represented, to finally have a character in media who shares the same lack of interest in romance and sex as I do.

When I entered the fandom to look for more content, I kind of expected to see the same respect for Alastor’s orientation there too. But that… wasn’t the case? I am fully aware that aromanticism and asexuality are both spectrums— of course, aromantic and/or asexual people can enter those kinds of relationships. I’m not denying that and they belong in the community as much as anyone else on the spectrum.

But, the more I see the same line again and again and again, the more it feels like an excuse to just ship what you want.

Usually I don’t mind shipping? I’m often a firm believer in people shipping what they like as long as it’s harmless and they don’t go crazy over it. I also know for a fact that Viv doesn’t have a problem with people shipping her characters. They are fictional, after all.

But in this case, people are ignoring the very thing that makes Alastor a part of the aroace community! People are ignoring his lack of romantic or sexual attraction!

Is this not the same as changing a gay character’s orientation to suit a straight ship? If not, how so? I’m told that we are a part of this community, so why aren’t we being treated like it? Why is it so hard to accept the people on the end of the spectrum who aren’t interested?

Something I’ve been noticing throughout my life is that society has not exactly progressed very much on the idea of accepting asexual or aromantic identities. Maybe we have, a little, since the old days— but hell, people in “the old days”, which in truth wasn’t very long ago, believed that asexuality was a medical condition to be “fixed” by taking the right medication or having sex. That’s a pretty low bar to clear. And on the romance side, you’re seen as a “late bloomer” or “boring” if you don’t express interest. These days, being friends with someone is treated like a gateway to them possibly becoming a lover. Not getting married, not going on dates, not wanting a partner— it’s all treated like a crime when it’s not.

Maybe I’m selfish, or sensitive, or I’m butthurt over nothing, or I’m making it all about me. Maybe I’m gatekeeping or whatever the term is. But please, please, please, I just want an aroace character like me who simply is not interested in sex or romance.

And I want fandom to respect that. I admire the creations that fans make— the art, the animatics, the writing and the character analysis. And I want people to keep creating because creation is indeed a beautiful thing.

But I really would like people to treat aroace identities like they’re important. Like it’s more than just a spectrum to get wiggle room to wrangle in another ship.

#aromantism #aromantic #aroace #asexual #hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin alastor #lgbtqia #alastor aroace #PLEASE i just want people to LEAVE HIM ALONE #“but it’s a spectrum” STOP USING IT AS AN EXCUSE #RESPECT AROACE PEOPLE WITH ZERO INTEREST IN ROMACE AND SEX #let us have this #we barely get anything as it is #but just to clarify i don’t believe that most people are being intentionally rude about it #nor am i discouraging people from creating fan content because it is FAN CONTENT and you can express yourself #i just would like people to understand a little more that #yes it is a spectrum and it covers an extremely wide range of orientations #yes ANYONE who identities as someone on the spectrum is completely valid #if you wanna argue with that i am showing you the door and kicking your sorry aphobic ass out #my point is that the spectrum is not a loophole. it is not an excuse and it is NOT okay to just use it willy nilly for your convenience

[peachie5000]

okay so the news about the series possibly having a future is huge but I also do really need to emphasize queerplatonic/aroace lapidot real

#steven universe #su #lapidot #lapis #peridot #peachie #aroace #lemme be clear i still think the other readings are valid #im specifically referring to the era where if you brought up aroace peridot #BC of how the show seemed to write her in relation to fusion #people would shut you down immediately #i think its important this article clarifies that it WAS in fact a consideration in her character

[rocksandaces]

Some ideas how to write a fanfic shipping a canonically asexual/aromantic character:

- have them discuss their asexuality/aromanticism with their partner

- make the love unreciprocated

- make it a queeerplatonic relationship

- make it a sexless relationship

- write the characters trying to find out how to make them both satisfied in a relationship with one person being ace and one not

Just saying "but aces can still have sex" is disregarding the character's personality. It is true but an asexual person having sex still thinks about it differently than an allo. Putting more effort into acknowledging the character's sexuality may result into a unique dynamic and cool story

#lgbtq #asexual #ace #queer #aroace #aromantic #asexuality #asexuals are valid #writing advice

[aroacewolfic]

I hate it when people's first reaction to me saying I'm aroace is "oh but don't you wanna have a partner and kids in the future, won't you be sad without that" Like no bitch I'm gonna be happy living alone in the peace and quiet with my cats and dogs and 1000 books to keep me company and I'm gonna be just as happy and complete as every other person out there if not happier.

#rage post #aroace rage #like yes i can find people attractive #BUT THATS BECAUSE IM NOT BLIND #im probably demiromantic but at the same time romance looks boring so imma just say no #aro #aromantic #aroace #ace #arospec #asexual #acespec #aroace pride #aromantic asexual #ace pride #aro pride #aspec #everyone is valid #but aroace is better

[mirick-vn]

our teacher told us to write an essay about any topic we'd like

sir, prepare to read paragraphs upon paragraphs about asexuality and aromanticism and how platonic relationships are just as good as everything else and not everyone has to have romance and sex in their lives to be fulfilled

#i'd say i pulled an all nighter for this but i passed out somewhere around 1am and now im cramming everything 2hours before school #but still #this is for the grades #and for the world to know that we exist and we're valid #asexual #asexuality #aromantic #aroace #aspec #aroace pride #asexuals are valid

[starchilddante]

Every ace person NEEDS this freaking book

It has a dozen fiction stories with ace characters all over the spectrum and in so many genres. Im talking ghost stories, supernatural, drama, sci-fi, you name it. I've literally cried three times while reading it I feel so seen

This is the representation ace people need. In every category. We need full length novels dedicated to the ace experience because this would've SAVED me as a kid.

If you're on the aspec, this books is for you.

#asexual #pride #lgbtq #ace pride #ace representation #aspec community #books #lgbtq books #being ace #madeline dyer #aromantic #aroace #ace is not a choice #ace is valid

[someoneq]

shoutout to aplatonics. you absolutely count as queer regardless of your other identities and I will defend that until the end of time

#im aroace and not apl but youre all so valid #aplatonic #aplspec #aspec

[yagikidd57]

#oversexualization #wtf #lgbtqia+ #asexuality #asexual #asexuality is valid #ace community #lgbtqia community #ace space #tiktok #acespec #aspec #aromantic #aromanticism #queer #queer community #aroace #arospec #lgbtqia #tw acephobia #tw aphobia

[privateolives]

This is probably because I grew up watching 24/7 animal planet, but what finally made the allo/aplatonic thing click for me were the nature's of big cats.

Lions are powerful, regal creatures who are uniquely adapted to pack life. They need these connections to live a healthy life; A lonely lion is a miserable creature indeed.

Jaguars are solitary, beautiful creatures who live happily solitary. They prowl their lush world with self-sufficient majesty. A jaguar is not lonely without a pack. In fact, forcing jaguars to share space with others they do not enjoy is just as damaging as forcing a lion to live alone.

A lion may choose to head out on it's own for the most part, but in the end must return to the pack to thrive. A jaguar can choose to trust and enjoy the company of others, but they never feel the need to form a pack.

Is a jaguar selfish for this? A psychopath, a narcissist or any other such horrid assumptions? Is it a less moral creature than a lion, who seeks others like it to thrive?

Is a lion pathetic, or needy, or selfish for wanting community? For requiring contact with others like they require water? For their inherent need to string complicated webs of relationships that may seem silly or dramatic to others?

Of course not. These are ridiculous questions to even ask.

They are simply lions and jaguars.

In fact, is a jaguar that chooses to spend time with you not as magical as a lion's love? For a creature that needs no bond to thrive to still enjoy your presence enough to share it a time? Is a lion who can prowl the night alone not impressive in its strength and resilience? Is it not awe-inspiring in its ability to conquer a life it was never wired for and reign still?

Are they not both beautiful and awe-inspiring in their own ways, without being wrong?

Alloplatonics. Aplatonics. Are we not both special and beautiful in both our bonds and self-confident happiness equal, in each our ways? Is there not unique beauty in lifelong bonded packs and magical encounters that need no perpetuity to carry life forward?

Are we not but lions and jaguars? Neither wrong, neither selfish, but just different and beautiful creatures in each our ways?

That's how I've come to see it, anyway.

#lgbt #aspec #lgbtqa+ #asexual #aromantic #aroace #loveless #aplatonic #alloplatonic #animals #I woke up at like 3 in themmorning to write this so I apologise for weird wording #I'm not awake enough to go hunting for the videos but if you want to see more about the equal majesty and difference in cats bonding #I suggest looking up Kevin Richardson's work with lions and panthers #I love animals. I hope I didn’t come off as degrading to anyone by using them as comparison #I can assure you the association only carries the deepest respect from me. #anyway all the aro discourse floating about made me think of this issue again #and how explaining allo/a-platonic needs has been a difficult task in the past #you're all valid no matter your labels or shapes or spots or manes #remember that when an orientation you don't understand comes to the lgbtable your job isn't to test them #it's to make room

[shmaroace]

i don’t need anyone’s permission to exist!!

#‘you’re so valid :)’ im valid by simply being alive i didn’t need a reminder that a lot of other people don’t see me as really human #aro #aromantic #arospec #ace #asexual #acespec #aroace #aspec #trans