#anyway fuck amazon

[lesbian-elrond]

Be he fan or mutual, be he foul or clean,

brood of Morgoth or bright Vala, Elda or Maia or Aftercomer, Man yet unborn upon Middle-earth, neither law, nor love, nor league of swords, dread nor danger, not Doom itself, shall defend him from Fëanor, and Fëanor's kin, whoso hideth or hoardeth, or in hate watcheth, watching keepeth or afar streameth The Tolkien LOTR Amazon show. This swear we all: death we will deal him ere Day's ending, woe unto world's end! Our word hear thou, Eru Allfather! To the everlasting Darkness doom us if our deed faileth. On the holy mountain hear in witness

and our vow remember, Manwë and Varda!

#This came to me in a vision #it's a shitpost don't take it seriously #fuck Jeff Bezos forreal though #I think tanking his stupid streaming service would be an excellent way to live up to the characters' legacy #but that's me and I can be overly intense about these things #this might honestly be the most cringe thing I've ever posted and I'm ok with that #anyway fuck amazon #fuck rings of power #lotr #silm #silm memes #feanor #maglor #maedhros #elrond #lord of the rings #tolkien #tolkien memes #tolkien shitposts

[inverts]

hey do y’all hate amazon? but do you struggle finding alternatives?

i am here to present you with one: bookshop.org!

bookshop.org is, as the title implies, mainly for books, which is what amazon started off doing (and how amazon joined hands with b&n to kill so many small local bookstores, but that’s a separate rant). but the really nice thing about it is that individual bookshops might have their own lists or storefronts on bookshop.org, and then if you buy from them, that bookshop gets 10% of your purchase! this is especially helpful for a small store that might not be able to fully manage an online shop of their own but who wants to have an online presence for customer convenience.

AND! today and tomorrow (oct 11 and 12) they are offering free shipping! this happens a few times a year and imo it’s always a great time to go ✨SHOPPING ✨

not sure where to start? here are a few suggestions (side note i also have an online presence on bookshop.org and these specific links will take you to ones through my shop)

Since I’m still reeling from reading Nona the Ninth, I might as well start this list with Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir! https://bookshop.org/a/3530/9781250313195 You’ve probably heard of Gideon the Ninth here on tumblr, but just in case you haven’t: GtN is the first in a series of books that are a blend of fantasy/sci-fi. Our main characters practice necromancy and travel from one planet to another at the call of their necromancer god, the emperor undying. the relationships are fraught, the viscera is plentiful, and the prose is phenomenal. what can i say that won’t spoil everything? all of the books in the series are great and only get better each time you read them, as they all have mysteries to unravel that are delightfully foreshadowed the entire way through.

If you are more of a sci-fi person and the fantasy aspect turns you off, I shall direct you to The Long Way To A Small Angry Planet, by Becky Chambers. https://bookshop.org/a/3530/9780062444134 This book is almost like taking a road trip through the universe, lol. Though dangers are real and present, the ensemble cast comes together as a supportive found family drifting along in outer space. I enjoy the world building we receive in bits and pieces--not only of how humans found their way to the stars, but the other species of people we meet out there. Also present is a nice queer relationship, as the icing on a spacefaring cake. ;3

Conversely, if you want your fantasy and no sci-fi, may I suggest The Dragon of Trelian by Michelle Knudson. https://bookshop.org/a/3530/9780763694548 Y’all know I’m weak to dragons so of course this sort of thing was coming. This book is the first in a trilogy, and follows two lead characters--the princess of a kingdom, and a mage’s apprentice. the two meet, become friends, and the princess lets the apprentice in on her little secret--she miiiiiight maybe have become psychically bonded to a baby dragon that is very quickly becoming Not So Baby. I really enjoy how this book series balances these two characters--neither of them become romantically invested in the other, but they ARE very important to each other and support and understand each other in a way that nobody else around them quite gets. they have very different personalities, very different worldviews, and very different desires, but they care each other, dammit. i love them.

if you’re looking for graphic novels, i have a few to throw your way as well, though i think that they need less introduction, lol. maybe you want to check out the hype of Spy x Family? (extremely cute how the found family aspect sneaks up on every character involved, i love them all so much) Perhaps you desire something very cute and very gay? (Or maybe you’re after gay but spicy?) do you wish for the high stakes action in kaiju 8? or would you rather read a hidden treasure that nobody else knows about?

ah hell just check out bookshop.org ok! it’s a great site :3

#anyway fuck amazon

[thebibliosphere]

Hi, I just finished reading Hunger Pangs and was thinking about how little sex scenes it had and it suddenly occurred to me that I may have read the wrong version. I bought the red one, Flirting with Fangs, as an ebook on Amazon. That's the sex one, right?

Yep! Hunger Pangs is a slow-burn romance series, so it takes a while to warm up. (That and I had to cut book 1 into two books, so a ton of scenes got cut X_x) Plenty more in book 2 :D

There's also a difference between romance and erotica, so the ratings apply to those different genres. Which admittedly, a lot of people blur the two, but I was trying to avoid getting my debut queer romance novel shoved into the erotica dungeon on Amazon (it sort of fucks your algorithm reach a bit).

This hilariously actually happened to the Fluff edition at first, but that's because there's a well-known homophobe who works on censoring during the weekend, and he tends to lump all queer stuff as erotica. (Fuck you, Carlos 🖕.)

Now that I've got the first book out the gate and a couple of the shorts, I can get away with more 😅

#I hate that it's even a thing I need to consider #but yeah #the fluff got flagged which I found *hilarious* #and then because Amazon flagged it #other retailers would have flagged it #the world is a fucking nightmare #anyway #more sex in book 2 ✌

[tapeworrmart]

Angry and scruffy

#Figuring him out. He's fucking hard to draw!!! But I wanna draw him w his powers #And I also wanna draw him and homelander 👀 #Tbh mate I'd be angry all the time if my hair was that much of a mess too #As a brit I can say Karl Urbans accent is hilarious to me and my whole family we find it endearingly bad #At least it isn't American bleeding through that sounds worse. He gets a pass to sound like Michael Caine sometimes I think. I'll let him. #Anyway by the way I love him. I love Billy Butcher with all my stupid gay heart. Don't even doubt that #The boys #the boys amazon #The boys butcher #Billy Butcher #William butcher #fan art #art #sketch #character art

[firstfullmoon]

does anyone have an ereader and read lots of poetry and/or pdfs on it and if so which ereader would you recommend

#no kindle please fuck amazon but I keep going back n forth between several kobo models ugh #clara 2e has pocket app + lots of good features for a reasonable price but kobo sage seems so good + stylus compatible but pricier #but also like what if I don’t like reading on an ereader at all & I spent all that money.....cuz I’ll prob still mainly read physical books #so it would just be for poetry collections and maybe some pdfs of books that r not in my library / too expensive 2 buy #anyway please help me <3 Im the worst at making decisions like that

[secretmellowblog]

Me (an lotr fan): wow I don’t think I could be more heartbroken over the way giant corporations have taken the story I loved and reduced it to a hollow financial asset that does enormous real-world harm. I hate how the story is irrelevant and meaningless to executives who only see it as a hollow spectacle they can manipulate for profit. But thankfully I can’t be surprised anymore there is no way they can possibly make it worse

Warner Bros:

Me:

#FUCK ALL THESE HORRIBLE GODAWFUL MONSTERS I HATE ALL OF THEM #I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE IT. #I KNEW THE STUPID GARBAGE AMAZON TRASH WOULD LEAD TO MORE GARBAGE LIKE THIS #*cough cough* #anyway #Lol love to see something you care about turned into a hollow empty product that exists only to burn down rainforests #though because the nft market crashed #itD be super funny if Warner bros invested everything in the stupid nft thing and bankrupted themselves #like the way the One Ring destroys itself #you know? the whole evil destroying itself thing #every day I go on Twitter but limit myself to thirty minutes because all the massive psychic damage I receive #but yeah it Sucks when a thing that was important to you becomes a tool for actual objective Evil

[delopsia]

Do not think about Rhett Abbott...

Word Count: 1,400 Warnings & Notes: I hope you're not allergic to pure fluff and ramblings :)

Whatever you do, do NOT think about Rhett Abbott shamelessly wrapping himself around you and snuggling you when you're cold. Uncaring of who is watching or how much Perry feigns disgust because there ain't no way he's going to let you be cold, not when he's practically a walking furnace.

Do not think about waking up to rocks hitting your window and looking outside to see Rhett smiling and waving at you because he wants, needs to spend every once of his free time by your side. Even if that means having to learn to quietly climb through windows and speak only in hushed whispers.

Do not think about complimenting him when he's upset and watching a smile fight its way across his face. Wanting to stay upset, but his smile only grows bigger the more he fights it, and his cheeks keep turning pinker and pinker.

Do not think about taking Rhett to the beach for the first time. Watching his eyes light up as he takes it all in before grabbing your hand and just about dragging you into the water with him. He learns that he fucking hates seagulls and you both get sunburned from how much time you spent outside, but it's the best spring break you've ever had.

Do not think about walking into a store by yourself and finding out that Rhett is there as well. How when he looks over and realizes you're there, his eyes light up, and he completely forgets what he's doing.

Do not think about mulling about the house in pure silence; each focused on your respective tasks. You catch yourself looking at Rhett with the smallest smile, and Rhett starts laughing because you've wound up so lost in him that you didn't hear him ask what you were looking at.

Do not think about watching him open his wallet and realizing that he's got a picture of you tucked inside. It's stained and bent, the edges torn to tatters from how much he pulls it out.

Do not think about Rhett chasing you around the house while you're both in your socks. Sliding around on the hardwood floors, laughing until your cheeks hurt and your sides burn because you've just stolen the last cookie out of the jar, and Rhett cannot let such a crime slide. He catches you in a big bear hug and gives you the cookie back after you forfeit.

Do not think about inviting him to take a bubble bath with you and him having a wild realization that he hasn't had a bubble bath since he was six. He hesitantly slides down into the bath behind you, unsure of all this, until he's got his chin hooked over your shoulder, bouncing his hand overtop the bubbles because it feels funny.

Do not think about how he always manages to find you when you're at your worst, kissing your cheek and promising that even if he can't make whatever is bugging you go away, he'll never let you suffer through it alone.

Do not think about Rhett relearning to play the guitar because he wants to play your favorite songs for you. He's not the best at it, and he struggles on some, but your heart jumps with excitement every time you hear him start playing.

Do not think about Rhett, who used to hate reading books, sitting down to read all of your favorites because he wants to understand all these stories you talk about. Then all of a sudden, you can't get him to go to bed, "just one more chapter!" and you spend too many nights laying in bed talking about what he just read.

Do not think about him coming home just minutes after he's left for work, swearing under his breath because he just realized that he didn't get his goodbye kiss from you, and he can't have a good day without one.

Do not think about falling asleep on the couch and Rhett shushing anyone who makes too much noise. More often than not, you wake up with his jacket tucked over you like a blanket, even if that means he'll be cold without it.

Do not think about watching Rhett take on someone twice his size at a bar because they wouldn't take no for an answer. He winds up with a hell of a black eye and a busted lip, but he comes out on top.

Do not think about patching him up after. How he hisses when you clean his cuts and insists that you really don't need to be doing this for him. But you do it anyway, and he offers you a million thank-you kisses.

Do not think about how even when you're by yourself, you feel protected because nobody is willing to mess with the Abbott boy's significant other.

Do not think about buying your first house together; it took Rhett leaving Wabang and getting a job that pays better to do it, but as long as he gets to come home to you for the rest of his life, he's the happiest man on Earth.

Do not think about him bringing his beloved horse along when you move; she was a birthday gift when he turned eighteen, and he wouldn't dare leave her behind. Her name is Isabella, she knows how to unlock her stall door, and she's got a nice little spot at the ranch Rhett works on. Sometimes you find Rhett knocked out in the pasture, with her standing next to him. 

Do not think about Rhett finding his mom's old polaroid camera and deciding to fill an entire binder with pictures of you, him, and all the things you do. There are little notes attached to each one, what you were doing, when, and leaving stars on his favorites.

Do not think about Rhett finding out that you've always dreamed of being kissed in the pouring rain. The next time it rains, it's late at night, but he drags himself out of the house, knocks on your door, and pulls you out into the front yard to kiss you until you're breathless and shivering from the cold. He gets sick, but he'd do it all over again.

Do not think about Rhett dancing with you in the kitchen late one night; he's horrible at it and can barely keep from tripping over your feet, but he spins you around like it's all he's ever known how to do.

Do not think about him slipping and falling to the floor because he wasn't looking where your foot wound up after he spun you. Your laughter dies into stunned silence when he settles onto one knee and produces a dainty little ring, and asks you to marry him.

Do not think about how his eyes water, and he has to blink back his tears when you walk down that aisle because even now, he cannot get over the fact that you're his.

Do not think about how shy he initially is when it comes to being naked around you because he's not as confident as he presents himself to be. How he blushes so hard that his ears turn red when you tell him that he's perfect the way he is, scars and all. 

Do not think about him catching the house mouse that's been plaguing you for weeks on end, using nothing but a cup and a piece of cardboard. He carries the little fella a few miles down the road and lets him free because he doesn't want to kill it just for trying to survive.

Do not think about Rhett falling asleep with his head on your chest, sleepily telling you that it's his favorite place because he gets to listen to your heartbeat. He fits on top of you so perfectly, heavy but not too much so, and always manages to pepper your face in a million tiny kisses when he wakes up from his nap. 

Do not think about Rhett calling you late one night; he's gone back home to visit family for a few days, but now he's upset because he can't sleep without his sweetheart cuddling up next to him. You go to sleep while still on the phone, and he comes home a day early just because.

Do not think about him coming home with a cardboard box full of kittens that he found on the side of the road. You wind up keeping one, and he's the only cat you've ever seen scream at the top of its lungs the way it does.

Do not think about pulling on one of his flannels and going about your daily business and how he gets that goofy grin when he sees you in it. He always says you look so perfect in his clothes, and if he could have it his way, you would never wear any of your own clothes. 

Do not think about how he chuckles when you tell him that you've intentionally gotten a hoodie that's his size because you want him to be able to wear your clothes too, and when he's lonely, he goes and snuggles up in that hoodie because it smells like you. 

Whatever you do, do not think about it.

#i cried writing this?? #my period is almost here and she's going to make sure we all melt apparently #because what the fuck is this #rhett abbott x y/n #rhett abbott x reader #rhett abbott #rhett abbott outer range #outer range #outer range amazon #rhett abbott imagine #rhett abbott x you #reader self insert #self insert #x reader #reader insert #rhett abbott headcanons #idk if its actually headcanons but im tagging it as that anyway since i used my headcanon banner

[neutral-party]

this show and its characters has taken hold of me.....

(click image for better quality!)

#a league of their own #aloto #lupe garcia #jess mccready #uh sorry for absolute radio silence in terms of art lately!! have been going thru major art block #ANYWAYS this show.. holy fuck it was so fucking good #if amazon cancels this or paper girls then im gonna be full of rage #my art

[angstyandgore]

finally got my hands on the audible version of dykes to watch out for omg big day for annoying people !!!

#dtwof #alison bechdel #fuck amazon tho like why did they choose to have it be produced by audible #anyway #roberta colindrez #jane lynch #i wonder if there's going to be a season 2 considering aloto cancelation

[devilsskettle]

i feel like i’ve been WAITING for the other shoe to drop wrt people’s opinions about watcher for this very reason. not that i think the reaction is completely not understandable but the greater the parasocial relationship, the greater the fallout as soon as public opinion shifts. you don’t have a relationship with these people they’re just content creators, chill

#ready to see all the people coming out of the woodwork to say how they’ve never liked watcher/unsolved/etc #and act like it’s ‘cringe’ now that their fanbase feels ‘betrayed’ #it’s great to have a fanbase but parasocial relationships will bite you in the ass every single time #it’s interesting too though because i’ve seen watcher have a LOT of support as they’ve tried to build something separate from buzzfeed #so this is the first time they’re getting real pushback about a decision they’ve made wrt shifting their platform/expanding their brand #so ig we’ll have to see how they react moving forward #but it’s soooo interesting to see how enthusiastically people dump on buzzfeed #AND how many people dump on youtube and how over the years so much of its functionality has been stripped away #how many ads you have to sit through. how much sponsored content there is now. etc #but when they try to do the same thing with youtube that they did with buzzfeed it’s like how dare you not lick their boots #because if you lick their boots and we lick their boots we can watch stuff for free #anyway. #even if you don’t any to say it’s a bad business decision. it’s not like there’s not precedent for it #1) the move away from buzzfeed was successful and 2) what about the dnd shows or whatever #don’t you guys watch those dnd shows that are ‘behind a paywall’ #don’t you guys have netflix hulu disney hbo amazon etc ad nauseum that are actually owned by billion dollar corporations #don’t you guys get on your high horses about supporting independent artists all the time #it’s interesting that people will profess to be such big fans!!! and feel like they’re friends!!!! #but how dare they think their work might be worth paying for #idk. idk. it’s entitlement though #sorry for the rant i’m ALSO not trying to blindly defend a bunch of people i don’t know #but you guys are being soooo fucking annoying about it lol #anyway i’m still waiting to see what their response is going to be from here before jumping to conclusions #also to be fair i am biased to be lenient about decisions made by independent filmmakers vs big studios etc #like everybody freaking out about the ai art used in late night with the devil. who cares honestly #‘they should’ve paid a real artist!!’ idk maybe their budget didn’t cover that #i don’t want it to become the industry norm but at the end of the day i would rather see indie shit getting made then only seeing #the big studios (who don’t have equitable practices anyway!!) making shit #but that’s another conversation. just to be transparent about my viewpoint on this kind of thing #maybe controversial but also can’t we have nuance. for once.

[nofacednerd]

if robin came back from the dead would that be fucked up or what

#wouldnt it be fucked up if your dead gf came back from the dead but youre the one who came back wrong lol #the boys #the boys tv #the boys amazon #annie january #hughie campbell #robin ward #drew hughie in that specifc pose to avoid drawing his face <3 jack quaid be easier to draw challenge #anyway I think the only option here would simply be polyamory they all have 2 hands #my art #doodles

[cleoselene]

me talking to my mom's Alexa: Alexa, play "Fuck Me Pumps" by Amy Winehouse Alexa: Here's Fuck Me Pumps (Clean version) from Amazon mu--- me, annoyed: ALEXA, play "Fuck Me Pumps" (Explicit) by Amy Winehouse Alexa: Here's *BEEEEEEP* Me Pumps by Amy Winehouse *proceeds to play the explicit version* Me:

#amy winehouse #literally what the fuck lol #here's FUCK me pumps the clean version #or BEEP me pumps (explicit)???? #amazon music is on some crack #anyway i love this song

[aliengirl]

my new obsession is doll houses, i cant stop looking at renovation videos and searching for ones that i could renovate myself even having low knowledge about those things

#pls brain we DONT NEED MORE HOBBIES #at least engage in something USEFUL like cleaning or cooking or some shit #i dont need another arts and crafts hobbie 😭 #i already paint/draw with 3 different stuff and i bought clay and i wanna learn sewing and crochet l #nOW DOLL HOUSES???????????? #where the fuck i will put one #anyways i found a good deal on amazon and im this 🤏 far from the purchase buttom #alien talks

[sloppy-biich]

I HATE the capitalist society I live in where I own like 6 copies of my favourite movies but i don’t have a dvd player to use in uni, so I search apon the streaming service I PAY and they are asking for yet MORE money in order to view my dearest comfort film

fuck prime I pay for the service why do I have to pay for more

#anyways recommend good pirate websites #all mine don’t work anymore #pirating #fuck amazon #stephen king it

[queenerdloser]

there's a lot of reasons to hate the way ad-based levels are now the standard starting level for streaming, but beyond just sheer blind hatred for it, it's also fucking annoying because they don't even have the diversity of actual tv ads. at least when you had regular tv channels you got like. usually a decent variety of tv ads coming your way and some local ads thrown in. with streaming services it's literally the same five fucking ads. i've seen the same ad for the same movie 40+ times because it plays at every single ad break. all this is doing is making me so homicidally irritated you're basically guaranteeing i'm never going to go to macy's or watch this stupid fucking horror movie about a pool. they're forcing us to watch ads and then they're making the ad-watching experience - already bad - even fucking worse.

#i finally gave up and decided to download criminal minds instead lmao i couldnt take it anymore #liveblogging life #im not joking about that horror movie ad it was on literally every! single! ad break! #also saw a LOT of amazon happy honda days and macy's #to the point where i now have zero interest in any of these brands. i've been so overexposed im just fucking annoyed about it #like i hate tv ads too but at least it wasn't the same fucking tv ads on every single ad break????????? #idk man i'm keeping netflix purely bc i do like having one (1) streaming option #but uh. i think i'm officially out of streaming outside of that. i already kind of was bc i only really have amazon prime & netflix #tried hulu. hate the ad experience. hate being bullied to the more expensive non-ad option. so bye hulu! #the main reason i like streaming is that i dont always know what i want to watch so i dont always have a whim thing downloaded #and it IS more effort to go and download shit if i dont already have it so it IS easier just to find it on netflix or w/e #but now with everything so spread out like... it takes just as much time to fucking find it anyway lmao #anyway the point is streaming sucks lmao

[rotisseries]

does everyone like my pfp I'm only gonna get like 24 hours out of it

#not even. I changed it at like 1 or 2 in the afternoon today when I should've done midnight #I can leave it for most of tomorrow too though probably #ANYWAY. NONE OF YOU HAVE COMMENTED ON IT #I SPENT TEN MINUTES FUCKING AROUND WITH A PICTURE OF SOME CHEAP ASS GLASSES OFF AMAZON FOR THIS