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that-green-haired-swordsman · 8 months

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I'm too lazy to write a detailed post about I liked and disliked about the One Piece live action, but let me say I'd give it a solid 8.5/10, it's far better than I expected it to be (I didn't expect anything tbh and was sure it would suck lol)

But as I'm rewatching it now I want to point out two things about Zoro that I'm missing, and no, it's not the goofiness that would be a tad bit out of place due to the overall tone of the show, it's

1. his lack of cheekiness, sometimes arrogance even, when he's enjoying a bit of trash talk during a fight, that kind of "fuck off you cockroaches, I'm the greatest" attitude he carried for a while, until he got his wings clipped by Mihawk at least and I think that he gets more stoic and serious after fighting Mihawk is a nice shift in his character for reasons I'm sure I don't have to explain to you, but it seems they're gonna make him the other way round in the show, let him open up and relax more instead of letting him get more serious, which would be a bit off in a live action TV show I'd say, because I think these shows just work better with people getting more comfortable with each other instead of one of them being more reserved, guess that just doesn't go along well with that "TV show formula" if you get what I'm saying.

2. What I also miss is his... excitement for fighting, he practically can't wait to meet an opponent he can improve his abilities with, which goes as far as that he smiles and grins devilishly (fitting his byname "demon" so well), which looks even more intimidating when he wears his bandana, and a more intimidating in general is what I'd love to see. He's more a silent ninja, so speak, with deliberate, thought-through movements, he includes his environment, which is an interesting take because as much as I love a Zoro who just slams his blades down and across hard for destruction, focused on strength instead of agility, never jumping backwards or sideways much, just forward, into his opponent, that new, more athletic take is believable because you can't tell me that Zoro never gets involved in a good and proper bar fight. How he flung that beer mug at the marine was just priceless. But when he fights, he often does it with a smile on his face which is so noteworthy as it contradicts his demeanor outside of a fight. Sometimes it's like he turns into another person when he really enjoys a fight, and he does enjoy them (he's arguably insane imo). BUT! That this trait of his is missing at this point makes room for a change of his demeanor once he's in Logue Town.

Kitetsu.

The cursed blade he obtains in that arms shop and claims he's managed to having broken or mastered that curse, just by outstretching his arm and challenging his luck another time. And so far, there hasn't been any indication that this curse is still active. (aside from the old Ashura theory)

But... what if it is? What if that cursed sword turns Zoro slowly, but steadily, into that bloodthirsty maniac we know from the manga and anime? What if guarded, calculated Zoro becomes this madman who licks his opponent's blood of his blades and smiles while doing so? What if the reason for this crazy behaviour is Kitetsu's curse, who forces him to become more reckless, more intimidating, if not even more demonic, since it's the will of the curse or sword, a curse that has killed each of his masters so far? And as Kitetsu was beaten by Zoro's luck when he tossed that sword in the air, the blade begins to corrupt Zoro's mind instead?

Idk if this is too dark for this adaptation but then again we had psychopathic Buggy. A blade with such power over Zoro would also fit to a drama-themed TV show I think. Idk I just think it would be cool. Because I always thought that, so far, Zoro got away too easily, considering he wasn't even on Rookie level when he challenged Kitetsu's curse and he beat it. Either Zoro was just hella strong even back then or it's just a weak-ass curse lol. Anyway, if the show runners would play a bit with that curse more, it would add some dramatic effect that would fit right in with the general tone, and we would get to see a bit more of that Zoro we're used to because if you call him a demon, it takes more to live up to that name than to just cut people in half... Yeah, carrying cut-off heads with him is pretty dark and cold, but a demon is something else, still, at least for me. Zoro can create an aura if he wants to that makes an opponent shit their pants, especially when he's in a fight, and if that would be the extension of that curse... Man I'd love this. The sword wants blood and Zoro has to deliver. Wow but it's PG-12 so probably not gonna happen but let me dream a little

#I'd still love that idea idc how it sounds I love it #What a twist it would be also #Zoro just beginning to open up and. Then he gets even darker. Whee that'd be so tragic and it's just my cup of tea lmao #roronoa zoro #One piece live action #Fuck im so tired but I wanted to get this outta my head

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moons-and-stars-and-shit · 3 years

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It worked! Sorry to bug you with a message! But I'd like to request a cake now!

So, about me. I have an actual name but I don't think I've heard it in months😃, instead I have a bunch of nicknames! (Rion, ri, oreo, onion, o, etc), I'm actually nb so I chose that name, however I 100% consider naming myself Arson💀My pronouns are they/them and I'm about 5'5, I have short, fluffy brown hair that I usually dye the front blue. I'm Asian hispanic, but I really don't look like either- my favorite foods are either really spicy and salty or sweet. Not the overwhelming chemical sweet tho, like a natural sweet flavor. My personality type is infp, and ig when I first meet people I can be shy (that's an understatement, I was mute for the first week of school🕳🏃‍♂️) but once I get to know people I can be pretty chaotic (once again, arson). I'm not a 100% demon spawn though, I don't really like making scenes in public and I probably will cry if I do- but I still have fun lol. I'm also the person who copes with severe mental health issues using humor, to an alarming degree 😔 I'm the therapist friend when really I'm the one who needs therapy. I also have a social battery that can die at random times, so I really like/need friends who can handle random mood changes of me going from energetic to silent in seconds. Academically, I'm really book smart, I'm a tutor, but my grades don't reflect it. I tend to procrastinate a lot and avoid studying, usually I catch myself last minute or trust memory on tests, but every now and then there's something that tanks my grades. I'm not very athletic, but I still try to play sports. I enjoy the feeling when I do something right, but the rest of the time I usually beat myself up for messing up.

And now just random facts 😃👍

My favorite color is yellow, not the bright eye sore shade that makes you want to throw up, but the nice softer, light shade. And I like anything that comes with that color! (Sunflowers, flowy sundresses and flip flops, summer activities, burning concrete, warm rain, etc). Nobody knows my music taste, it changes weekly, however I usually come back to mitski/cavetown or summer themed songs a lot! I enjoy playing music, but I have the curse of being a fast learner so that usually leads to be being bored and learning a new instrument at any given chance. And my birthday is a weird date that fucks with zodiacs so I can be considered either a leo or cancer, my personality changes a bunch, so take your pick lol. (Though emotionally I tend to be cancerous, I just express it and show it in a way a leo would) And someday I wanna be a long term traveler, or a florist. Just a job that makes me happy :). And I guess if I had to classify my aesthetic it would be bloomcore or soft grunge. I like wearing big sweaters and if I could I would wear a bunch of butterfly clips in my hair and wear mom jeans. (I would also wear man crushers, I mean, platforms if I was confident)

Aaaannnnd that was really long sorry!

To sum up, I'm just a bipolar bitch with depression and anxiety 👍

Thanks a bunch for just taking the time to read this!

@oririon

Romantic Matchup

Bokuto Koutarou

How Y’all Met

IERJNDJS

I’m getting a classic summer love vibe from this matchup 👀

Ok so I just Hc that Bokuto LOVES flowers

So he would always just go to the local flower shop to look at them

Pls hes to precious I cant-

But anyways you we’re working a summer job at the flower shop

And you grew fond of our little owl boy

You would always talk to him whenever he visited

He just made your job that much more enjoyable :)

So one day you stopped him right before he left and told him he could pick a bouquet of flowers if he wanted

He BEAMED at you and picked a bouquet of flowers he always looked at whenever he came

But what shocked you was instead of walking out with them

He gave them to you!

He then went on talking about how he really liked you but didn’t know how to tell you

At this point he was just rambling

So you laughed and asked him if he would like to go to the ocean with you after your shift

He agreed and you swear you saw stars in his eyes

After your shift you met up with Bokuto and went to the beach

You guys literally spent ALL day there!

And even some of the night 👀

Being the gentleman he is offered to walk you home

And when you two got to your house he asked you to be his s/o

What They Love About You

Ok starting off with a strange one

He loves the fact that your favorite color is yellow 💛

He just thinks it fits you so well 😊

He loves that you have to ability to turn your trauma into humor

Now I’m ngl...

Ye found it extremely concerning at first 🥲

But once you explained it was like a coping mechanism for you

He was super supportive!

AAAAAAAA

He LOVES your aesthetic!

He thinks it’s so cute

And once again he thinks it fits you 👀

He appreciates the fact that your smart

If he doesn’t understand something in class

He’ll just go to you!

And honesty going over the material with him has helped your understanding as well 👀

Bokuto s grades:📈

Your grades: 📈

Favorite Things To Do Together

Oml he loves summers with you

Any summer activity

Beaches

Ice cream

Flower meadows 👀

Summer night drives

The whole shtick

But when it’s not summer

He loves doing classic seasonal activities

Examples:

Fall - Jumping in leaf piles, coffee dates, preparing for Halloween, etc

Winter - Snowball fights/Making Snowmen, Christmas movie marathons, hot cocoa/ baking, etc

Spring - Dancing in the rain, picnics, gardening etc

It’s a vibe year round with bf Bokuto

Random Hc

His favorite season is summer

And his second is winter

Ik...polar opposites

Oof

He TOTALLY gets your mood swings

Although they may not be the same as his

He still understands them and respects them

Every year on your anniversary he buys you the exact same bouquet he gave you at the flower shop

Speaking of the flower shop 👀

He got a job there with you the following summer

So you guys basically spent most of your days together

Bokuto is REALLY bad at dark humor

But for some reason he still tries 😭

It’s either TOO dark

Or not dark at all 💀

Astrology

(We’re gonna go with your cancer zodiac 😂)

When Cancer and Virgo make a love match, a strong, down-to-earth relationship with staying power is the happy result.

This is a relationship with great potential to get better and better over the passing years.

Both Cancer and Virgo are goal-oriented and disciplined.

They are sincere and devoted to one another and share a strong sense of purpose.

No lightweight love here: These two were not really built for flings!

Cancer and Virgo deeply admire one another: Virgo respects Cancer’s quiet strength and dedication while Cancer appreciates Virgo’s keen adaptability and intelligence.

These lovers may get off to a slow start, but over time, bonds will only grow stronger.

The Cancer-Virgo love match prides itself on common sense and strong principles over fluff and inconsequential or fleeting connections.

They enjoy the material comforts of life, but they will only feel good about their bounty if it has come as a result of honest hard work.

There could be tiffs if Virgo becomes too critical for Cancer’s easily bruised feelings; Cancer needs to understand that it’s just Virgo’s nature to point out what they observe, that it’s not a personal attack.

A Virgo may bristle at their Cancer mate’s stubborn streak, but it’s a trait that a patient and understanding love partner like Virgo could come to appreciate.

Also, Virgo’s urge to serve suits Cancer’s affectionate, nurturing nature well.

Their dedication to working toward the same goals.

Both partners in this love match enjoy a stable home life and nice things, and Virgo truly enjoys helping Cancer along the way to achieving their goals.

Their shared goals and desires make theirs a highly compatible love match.

Overall Aesthetic

Bloomcore 🌸

Bloom - Jesse

This Side of Paradise - Coyote Theory

Flaming Hot Cheetos - Claire

Mystery of Love - Sufjan Stevens

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu fandom #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu hcs #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu matchups #bokuto #bokuto koutarou #bokuto x y/n #bokuto x reader

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sebastianshaw · 3 years

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Let's go wide and predictable... Tell me about the different WoD incarnations for Shaw. :>

OK SO First thing I am glad you are also a nerd for this so I don’t don’t to explain all these terms. Secondly wow I need to be better about tagging/organizing, I couldn’t find all the other posts on this I was SURE I wrote. SO HERE’S A BIG FAT POST, RIP YOUR EYES

VAMPIRE Lasombra: This is the clan I typically default to in answers for him AS YOU HAVE NOTICED. I mean, they’re dark aristocrats who are all about Social Darwinish, preying on the weak, and the strong reigning. They primarily enforce this subtly through political games, but they have NO PROBLEM throwing an elegant Potence-backed punch. While one would think that these proud predators demanding sniveling obedience---and one would, in a way, be right---they certainly don’t RESPECT it, and it can even induce violent rage in them. Fits Shaw to a T. Sure, the Catholicism/Church control and Spanish origins and attraction to the sea and Abyss mysticism aren’t for him, but hey, he fits the outlook of the Clan perfectly aside from the religious aspects, and no one fits EVERY stereotype of a clan anyway. Most Lasombra are Sabbat, and he could be too, but he would be in it for personal power, not true belief in being the Sword of Caine. I can equally easily see him going antitribu for the political power and stability of the Camarilla. My other choices for him are VENTURE which is pretty obvious, but also Gangrel, which sounds counterintuitive but I HAVE A REALLY GOOD ARGUEMENT FOR IT! WEREWOLF Shadow Lord. Total Shadow Lord for pretty much all the same reasons as Lasombra. Like just LOOK AT THIS QUOTE: “ The Shadow Lords are a fictional tribe of Garou (werewolves) in White Wolf Game Studio’s Werewolf: The Apocalypse role-playing game. […] The Shadow Lords’ lives are like a daily game of chess and a constant struggle for power […] Shadow Lords respect power and condemn weakness, any cub who’s not strong enough in their eyes is banished from the tribe [… ] None of the other tribes like them very much, or at all, but even the ones who hate them most don’t question their ability to get things done. […] perhaps the largest camp, the Lords of the Summit tend to be the stereotypical Shadow Lords - power-hungry, manipulative, ambitious, and arrogant. This by no means makes them less dangerous foes.” And like. . . .they focus on political and intellectual power FIRST, and that sort of character is typically physically weak. But as with the Lasombra, nope, the Shadow Lords had bodily power too; they’re described as looking more like over-muscled pit bulls in lupine form than wolves. So....yeah, that’s perfect. Because Shaw does fight “smart” first, he ideally never touches his opponent, but when he has to? BOY CAN HE PULVERIZE. So, Shadow Lord Shaw is a Homid, probably an Ahroun but maybe a Philodox, and he has a lot of Glass Walkers following him as well as fellow Shadow Lords; he finds great use in their technological talents and ability to adapt to an urban environment and OWN it (rather than just SURVIVE in its fringes like a Bone Gnawer, as he sees it) and they organize themselves in a corporate-like structure where he takes a natural lead. While the Shadow Lords are stereotypically/traditionally Eastern European, they can be of any race today. Shaw’s dad is English, but since we never see his mom in canon, for this version I’m saying his mom was a great big Eastern European Shadow Lord, and that’s why he never knew her, because the Garou aren’t typically raising their own young. He’s just. . . .big brutal wolf boy. And has like a billion puppies/Kinfolk kids. I DREW HIM FERA Ok, so I picked a BUNCH of Fera for Shaw, and you know why? I could. Literally just because I could. I don’t have a DM to tell me no! I even picked extinct ones, BECAUSE I WANTED TO! Cat-wise, I like him as a Khan or a Khara. Are the Khara extinct? Yes. Do they really suit him, the way they’re described less as warriors and more just secret-gatherers? Not at all. I picked them because I just like the idea of him turning into a massive, massive black smilodon. Because I think it’s cool and I don’t have to respect canon here. He can be the last of the Khara and not fit them at all if I say so. And hey, he LOOKS like a prehistoric man already! As for the Khan. . . .of the extant Bastet, the Simba and Khan fit him best. And if I am being honest? The Simba probably are a better fit for him. And I’m fine with that. I’m fine with Shaw as a big ol werelion with a black mane. But I also just really, really like the Khan. And as I have made clear, I am running this show. So my first choice for him that isn’t a Shadow Lord, is a Khan. They’re most typically Indian, Chinese, or (due to breeding with colonizers in India) English, so he could be one of the English Khan, and hey, fighting the Wyrm gives him a good outlet for. . . himself. Their human forms are also typically tall and HUGE, upwards of 300 lbs, and they’ve sired some of the most beautiful kittens and powerful bloodlines. T “ The Simba may declare themselves nobility, but the weretigers fit the title. Regal hunters and warriors, these Bastet evoke the respect the lions demand. From the snowy mountains of Asia to the cities of India, the weretigers hunt the spawn of Asura and defend the last of their Kin. They’re solid, dependable, smart and strong. Their weaknesses, such as they are, come from being too trusting or too sure of themselves. Khan are straightforward and action-oriented, not clever schemers. Whatever a Khan does, he does full-tilt — fighting, romancing, hunting, studying, even contemplating. These Bastet throw themselves into all tasks with vigor and passion, and their bodies, in any form, bristle with vitality. Most Khan love company; though few of them can stand the presence of another of their kind for long, they often enjoy companions. And who would deny a tiger’s friendship? It’s said the Khan were brought forth to battle demons, and many of them take that charge literally. Vampires, Asura and fomori have few enemies more relentless than a tiger. Perhaps that’s why the Khan have been brought to the verge of extinction: They made too many of the wrong kind of enemies.” “ The tribe’s traditional cultures stress honor and obedience. The treachery of Nagda was worsened by the stain it put on the tigers’ pride. While solitary in nature, most Khan establish protectorates where they defend a given family or land against corruption. The fact that “defense” occasionally includes killing certain people doesn’t detract from the tribal purpose. The Kahn were created to war against demons. Those who court the darkness must die “ “ While many Khan tend to be bad-tempered and aggressive, others love company of all kinds (and are powerful enough to demand respect). “ So, is that ALL Shaw? No. He’d be a particularly nasty, scheming Khan, in fact, a little unusual for his breed. But that’s hardly unheard of. After all, the famous English Khan named Lord Clouster “had cobras for a heart; he tossed his own kuasha beneath the wheels of a train, fed his wife to a suttee fire by pretending to be dead, then killed his children when he found they did not carry the Changing Touch.” And another Khan, the Indian sultan Nagda, got into a feud with another Khan and “ taken over by his rage, the Sultan Nagda betrayed his race and used a tribal secret. During an eclipse, his assassins struck all over Asia, slaying nearly 100 Khan and many Kinfolk outright.” So, Khan can be bad too. But not as bad as the Simba. “ “The Lords of Sunlight.” That’s what they call themselves. Like the blazing mane around the heads of their kings, werelions liken themselves to the sun. All things have a place and an order and rebels must be reminded of this fact. The real fact, of course, is that the other tribes dislike the lions; the Simba may call themselves “Lords of Sunlight,” but many other cats give them another name: “The Dark Kings,” an unflattering comparison to the Khan. The Simba aren’t villains; they’re magnificent lords, slayers of demons. Things are simply out of order. When the balance is restored, when the humans know their place and the cities become graveyards, the lions will be proven right. The demons of the modern age can be traced to the end of the Impergium and the laxity of the Changing Breeds. The Simba mean to put things in order, and if that requires bloodshed, so be it. Warfare is the sport of kings” “ Werelions value strength and order. Despite their bloody reputation, Simba adore their loved ones, and watch their Kinolk closely. Children and kittens are raised within the pride and must constantly prove themselves to survive. “ “ Each pride has one Mtolo (“father”), or dominant male, and several Kirii (“wives”) and Anwana (“young hunters”). Small prides defer to larger ones, and may owe allegiance to a Chakuva (“High King”) like Black Tooth. “ So, Simba are very patriarchal, very hierarchal, and want to run everyone else and feel they’re entitled to do so by birthright, and the more I talk the LESS it sounds like Shaw actually? Like don’t get me wrong, he’s proud and power-hungry AS YOU KNOW, but what sets him apart from Apocalypse or Magneto or Xavier is that Shaw has never sought to have mutantkind follow him. He has his own ideologies, but he has never sought to lead others or enforce it on them. So really, the Simba mentality of “we should be in charge because it’s us” DOESN’T work for him, nor does the idea of being entitled to do so, as Shaw’s “power first” mentality is all about EARNING your position, not deserving it automatically. It’s all very Fabian though! So I’ll leave that here as a bonus for you instead of going back and deleting it lol. yEAH HE’S A BAD KHAN, BASICALLY And his Pyrio, no matter what cat type he is, would be Night. Each Bastet has a “Pyrio” meaning a classification of their general personality and what fields they’re likely to pursue and be talented in. “Like the Dark Father Cahlash, the favor of the Night indicates a sinister or hidden nature. Most Bastet with this Pryio tend to withdraw from others, concentrating on their own business unless interrupted. Although they might not be actively malignant, they have short tempers and quiet ways, and fiercely guard their privacy. Night Bastet prefer occupations such as assassin, scholar, scientist and dark mystic. In the wilderness, the Night cats are hidden hunters and man-eaters, with nasty dispositions and an eerie reputations. These are the cats whose deeds are told around campfires for years to come. If you’ve got a disposition toward the Night, activities that cause others discomfort, reinforce your private space or protect some valuable secret from outsiders can refresh your Willpower.” So yeah. Shaw is a night kitty. Rats are not the type that fit him the MOST, but I drew him as a RATKIN WARRIOR anyway. Because rats. Also while I drew him as a Warrior, he could also be an Engineer or a Plague Lord (specifically sylphyllis; every Plague Lord contracts with a disease spirit and embodies its most horrific symptoms and I just love the idea of this hideous terrifying syph-ridden Shaw) And hey, he can get into the “culling humanity” and “survive so that you may breed” deal! Most wererats also have very little kindness towards the weak either, despite being the underdogs of the Fera themselves. Likewise, hyenas aren’t the breed that fit him the most but I kinda dig the idea of him as an Ajaba? Their role was choosers of the slain, tasked with culling the sick, dying, and unfit. They were called rainmakers because of the tears their task brought to others, and they did not spare even their own. Then, the Simba came to their lands, and enacted genocide against them. They left Africa and spread across the globe, now breeding indiscriminately to survive and can be any race. What holds them together now first isn’t any duty, but the desire to simply stay alive. And both those things---culling weakness, and being knocked off his pedestal and now forced to fight for scraps in the shadows to survive---seem fitting for Shaw. The philosophy is obviously what he’s always had, and the degraded position reflects where he currently is in canon. He’s not usually the underdog, but he is here---but doubtlessly a brutal one, the Fera equivalent of a gang leader, recruiting Also they’re matriarchal and I kinda like the idea of him having to deal with that, as....that kind of fits too? Shaw was the only MAN of note in the Hellfire Club. All the other most iconic, powerful, threatening members were women, and Shaw’s never really had a chance (or tried to fuck with) any of them. He’s USED to being around a ton of badass ladies who are calling the shots, that’s just TUESDAY for him. Finally---FINALLY-- I could see him as the odd human-born Rokea. A Great White, of course. Again, it was probably his mother who was the Fera, some monstrous creature who came on land and mated with his human father, only to spawn this boy while still out of the water. All Rokea are ugly in their human state, but Shaw looks better than most due to being born on land and as a human, and he is also able to move through---and thrive---in human society. Since he is seen as a Betweener---one of the Rokea who “betrays” the Sea by living on land instead---stepping into what should be his natural habitat is always risky for him, as other Rokea WILL kill Betweeners on sight. And the single-minded nature of sharks leaves little room for explaining oneself. Oh did I say finally SURPRISE I HAVE ONE MORE. The peaceful, matchmaking, extinct Apis don’t really fit SHAW aT ALL, and they’re EXTINCT, but I love the idea of him turning into a HUGE BLACK BULL. So here’s my explanation. The deal with the Apis is that when their numbers reached the single digits, a last handful of young Apis called Last Hope went into the Deep Umbra and haven’t been seen since. The “hook” in the 20th anniversary Changing Breeds book for their return is that maybe they finally came out the Umbra and back to the physical world. My idea is that he and HAVEN are mebers of Last Hope who have re-emerged in modern times to bring back their kind---something that rests entirely on SHAW’S shoulders, since Haven’s womb was cursed by the Wyrm. So it’s up to him to just breed with as many women and cows as possible. So he’s got an excuse! And as for why he’s so un-Apis, my explanation is that the trauma of their species being wiped out and the time that was allowed to fester in them during their long sleep in the Deep Umbra, drove Haven and Shaw to two extremes of Apis behavior. Haven took on the gentle caretaker side to the extreme, becoming so pacifistic she can’t fight or defend herself. Shaw went the other end, becoming so enraged and resentful that he’s become more like a bloodthirsty predator himself. Eventually, they both fall to madness after re-emerging, but in the opposite ways that everyone expect. It’s the sweet gentle Haven who ends up Frenzying other of control in a berserker rage, rampaging across the city in massive bovine form, causing untold death and destruction until she’s put down. . . .while the cruel violent Shaw falls to a “cow version of Harano” sinking into a depression so profound he goes catatonic up until Haven’s own loss of sanity, at which point he throws himself on her horn. The story ends with the last of the Apis truly dead, but with a new hope for the species living on in Shaw’s children, who are showing signs of being Kinfolk or Apis themselves.

#world of darkness #vampire the masquerade #werewolf the apocalypse #wod #wta #vtm #episomalvector

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mementofloreo-archived · 3 years

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@sorrowmarked || smoochie prompts || hehehehehe[this is cut bc it is SUPER FUCKING long. This is literally the longest thing I've written for you I think]

His team has had a couple of practice matches against the soccer club from Ken's school since they both entered high school, in part thanks to Daisuke's friendship with him. Even without any influence from dark gears or things like that Ken has managed to remain an excellent player with a wide reputation.

Daisuke is unknown, of course. There was no soccer club at his middle school, after all, so he wasn't able to play competitively. He stayed on top of fitness training, even adopting some of the rigorous conditioning routine his sister had used for prep after being scouted by a pro team. Still, with no reputation to boost him he had to earn his place on the main lineup when he entered high school.

...Which he's done, really. He's far exceeded anyone's expectations, especially his own. His drive, his vigor, and his honest love for playing have earned him a lot of strong friendships, and apparently also skyrocketed the morale and motivation of his teammates on more than one occasion. They went from a club thought of as 'not bad, but nothing special' to semifinalists at the prefectural tournament all within the course of his first year. They'd lost to Ken's school, in fact, by a single point shave in the last two minutes of the match.

At his school, first years who join the club via application and not recommendation don't play starting positions in tournament matches(common practice, really). Daisuke still managed to distinguish himself, though. When he was played as a starter in practice matches against Ken's school he was usually placed in a midfield winger position. It gave him some flexibility for movement while relying on the one thing the coach and captain already knew he had, which was stamina.

When their first tournament rolled around, he was put in as a substitute for their attacking midfielder. The position was considered the playmaker, as far as team structure. They were responsible for helping to direct the flow of the team's offensive play, connecting the defensive positions to the forward ones and managing the support for the striker, who was the primary goal scorer(and the position he had played in elementary). For Daisuke, it felt like a test, an opportunity and a show of faith all in one, and so he'd pushed himself past his limits to live up to those expectations.

His fierce, quick, and precise play style coupled with his apparently 'freakish' stamina and adaptability in the position have since earned him a place as its starter as well as the team's vice captain in his second year.

When he was ten or twelve, he'd have been gunning for the striker position. It was flashy and considered the really 'cool' position in most formations.

Now, though, he's stopped caring about looking cool. He wants to play his best, he wants to have fun- and he wants the rest of the team to have those things as well. Realizing that his play sense and his technical skill are best suited to that position when those goals are in mind, he's both content with and proud of his current place.

Ken is a striker. And in their practice matches this season his team has, as usual, come out on top(even if it's usually close).

In the prefectural finals this year, Daisuke's team drags Ken's into a lengthy and brutal double overtime- in the pouring rain, no less. Everyone is exhausted, sore, soaked and filthy. Losing momentum, losing cohesion, desperate for a goal just so things will be over.

...Daisuke, though, ignores it. His burning legs, the sharp pain of his overworked lungs, the chafing of his drenched uniform, the slick ground beneath him and the way the water impedes the ball's movement. He puts himself in a mindset as if he were playing a one on one scrimmage against his sister. She's a professional player on a high ranking team in the highest tier women's league of Japan's professional circuit and has even earned a place on its national team.

If Daisuke's stamina is freakish, then Jun's entire spectrum of skill is on the same level as a natural disaster. The ferocity and lack of hesitation she shows on the field would terrify any normal high schooler, boy or girl, and even a lot of capable players from the men's league.

Which means that even a casual match against her demands ignoring his body's pleas for a break and pushing past its screaming to keep playing at his top form no matter how exhausted he is.

That's the extent he exerts himself to in that double overtime. He's in a state where he barely even registers physical sensation because he's so focused. He barely even registers the directional tips he shouts to the other mid and forward positions, and he doesn't register at all the captain calling for everyone to follow Daisuke's lead.

There's a single thought in his head: keep moving. If he stops or even slows down for just a split second, he knows he'll keep losing steam and he won't get it back. He has to barrel forward no matter what until the game is over. He doesn't pay attention to the faces or numbers of the opposing team. He focuses on keeping the ball in play, keeping his body in motion and staying at least aware of where his teammates are, though he doesn't differentiate between them very well.

When he scoops the ball right out of Ken's grasp, turns sharp, rockets past him, he doesn't know that it's Ken. He doesn't try to close the full distance to the goal either. The moment he sees a small gap in the defense he shoots. For the left corner and with every ounce of strength he has left.

The ball hit's the keeper's open palms- and blasts right through them like they're made of paper, making a loud snap sound and spinning against the net. Daisuke watches it sail in, speechless, and slowly he sinks to his hands and knees, well past being completely spent.

His awareness comes back to him gradually in the several seconds both the players and spectators are left in shock to process the split second reversal and upset of a team that made it to the nationals last year. Even the referees take a few second to declare the clean goal. But once they do, everything erupts around him.

He hears it, registers the shouting and the celebration, the exhausted and frustrated but still impressed acceptance of the other team. And he lets himself laugh breathlessly in relief, still completely unaware that he left Ken dizzily in the dust a few moments ago. Right at that second, he's mostly glad he still pre-medicates with his inhaler before any kind of exercise and keeps it on hand as a rescue. He's going to need it.

His teammates, bless them, have the presence of mind not to jump on him the way they would normally. The captain and Ken make sure he's not injured and help him to his feet, and once he confirms he can walk with some support they help him to the sidelines. The teams shake hands, exchange congratulations. Both for a hard earned victory and a well played match despite a loss. The coaches and officials are able to get the attention of the crowd enough to let the players have some breathing room for a few minutes.

Ken informs Daisuke of exactly what he did in those last few seconds while he digs for his inhaler and then takes a long drink from his water bottle. Daisuke is a little shellshocked by it all now that he's properly registering it, but he's happy all the same. He's helped carry his team to nationals, a first time accomplishment for them.

Moreover, he had the time of his life with this match, even as exhausting as it was. The frail little kid he used to be would never believe he could accomplish something like this.

He makes a note to himself to call Jun with the news- this isn't the kind of thing he should relay via text. She'd just drop everything and call him to yell about it anyway.

There isn't a formal locker room building at this field, but there's covered areas around the benches and a lot of the seating. Daisuke and a lot of his teammates take some time to rinse the mud and sweat off of exposed skin, towel off, change into dry shoes from their cleats, put their warmups on to keep from catching cold.

Everything is so hectic that when he finally shoulders his bag and shambles off the grounds a half hour later he's completely forgotten that Hikari was planning to try and be at the match.

So when he sees her he's not really shocked, but he does sort of stare at her for a few seconds, brainless.

She's been his girlfriend for less than three months. Having her so openly focused on him is still a new experience. In general he's really not used to being anybody's first priority. He still pinches himself sometimes to make sure he's not dreaming when Hikari ducks under one of his arms to curl against his side on the train or in front of the television.

Still, he manages a weary smile, and greets her. "I'm glad you managed to make it out," he says, and his voice is hoarse, "I know you weren't sure you'd be able to see the whole game, or even be here at all."

He lifts his neck towel and wipes some lingering rainwater off of his face.

...She's a little flushed, he notes. Wearing a decent raincoat and carrying an umbrella. She's just a bit damp, where he's still pretty drenched. (the moisture and humidity add just a touch of wisp to her hair though, lift it just a little from its usual straight line. It's cute.)

A half suppressed laugh trickles out of her as she looks up at him. Daisuke's not very tall- he's right around average height- but he's strong, filling out a lot as he nears the end of his growth period, so Hikari looks almost tiny next to him now. (She certainly feels delicate when he hugs her)

Her eyes are shimmering. It's easy to see she's feeling pretty emotional right now, and she still hasn't said anything. Daisuke rifles a hand through his hair awkwardly.

"...Uh...Hikari-chan?" He asks, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she blurts, beaming, "Sorry. You were just- you were incredible out there. I think you left everyone there starstruck."

"O-oh," he feels himself flush, "Y'think? Those last few minutes I was running on autopilot, so I wasn't really-"

The rest of whatever rambling he was launching into freezes and catches in his throat. If real life came with record scratches or freeze frames, this would be one of those moments.

She's usually the one to kiss him first. He's a little shy, still, not completely confident taking the initiative with affection yet.

But this is- she's never jerked him down by the collar before. Certainly not so suddenly and so sharply that he's actually unbalanced and brought in.

It's a hell of a kiss, to be frank. Firm, held out for so long, her hands moving to his shoulders, pulling herself in as close as she can until he has the presence of mind to lift her at the waist and kiss back.

He's outright dizzy when she finally lets him break away for air, and Hikari is flushed and beaming.

"Uh," he fumbles, "Oh, uh. Okay."

She peppers his face with short, sweet little pecks until he's laughing, and then she hugs him tight.

"I know how hard you worked to get here," She murmurs, "I'm so proud of you. Congratulations, Daisuke."

He tenses just a little in response. Hearing this kind of praise from anyone is always a bit of a tearjerker for him, but from Hikari it's a million times more significant.

"Yeah," He breathes, setting her down and holding his hand out for the umbrella. "...Let's get to the station, though. I want to get somewhere I can change into dry clothes. And then maybe pass out for a couple of hours. I'm beat."

#「ʜᴇʀᴏᴇꜱ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴄᴏᴍᴩʟᴀɪɴ║ꜱᴏ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ʟᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ꜱᴇᴇ yᴏᴜʀ ᴩᴀɪɴ」 [Daisuke]#「ᴡʜᴇɴ ʟɪꜰᴇ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇꜱ ᴜꜱ ʙʟɪɴᴅ║ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴋᴇᴇᴩꜱ ᴜꜱ ᴋɪɴᴅ」 [Daisuke🎔Hikari;sorrowmarked]

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transhitman · 3 years

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Nobody asked but I wanna talk about my OC universe. Specifically the biology of the human species because I think it’s cool as fuck. Basically, homo sapiens is extinct after nuclear winter and all the fantasy races are the different evolutions of the human species with adaptations that allowed them to survive. There are 6 total and they’re all sort of like combinations of two or more more traditional fantasy races so yeah.

H. magus -- HUMANS -- Only named as such because they’re the only ones that don’t have a major outward change in physiology. They look pretty much the same but are a little bit taller on average and can have gold or purple eyes. They survived via the magic of invention and Literal Magic, and mostly stayed in one spot. They sat on resources and created pretty capitalist-leaning societies, and thus didn’t have to undergo any major changes. However, there are still enough small differences to qualify them as a different species than H. sapiens, namely that their bodies conduct magic really REALLY well.

H. bucerus -- OGRES -- Sort of like a mix between tieflings and orcs. They’re descendants of the people who were ostracized from the Human communities for whatever reason, and had to deal with radiation, harsh weather, and GIANT FREAKING SHADOW MOSTERS. Since the Human ancestors were sitting on all the resources, the proto-Ogres were forced to become nomadic. In order to survive the Badlands, their muscles became much more dense, granting them super strength. However, they also weigh twice as much as a Human of the same volume and require twice as much food. They also developed methods of dealing with cancer caused by the radiation of the world. They basically integrate tumors into their bodies as horns. They have a special type of white blood cell that specifically targets cancerous growths and forces them to the surface of the skin, where they can be removed. They also have tails, which suit their environment. There are different variants depending on the global region they’re from, each with different horn and tail types. Probably the sexiest species. They’re tall ^__^ But their size is limited to like 7ft since being too big and dense would be DISASTEROUS in the food-scarce Badlands.

H. gurges -- DWARVES -- Ok so they’re honestly more mermaid-like, but I’m trying to fit a theme with the names here. They are short, though. And most of them live in cities that are below the surface, just not a solid surface. The Dwarves are descendants of the seafaring survivors of the Pacific Ocean. There is actually a wide variety that could count as dozens and dozens of separate species, but for function’s sake they’re all under the same category. They have convergently evolved with different types of fish, getting less and less human-looking the deeper in the ocean they live. On the surface, they’re just people with fluorescent skin tones. In the Abyss, they’re barely even human. They are able to withstand enormous pressure, and notably can form symbiotic relationships with sessile sea life. Sponges and barnacles and the like often grow on their bodies, sometimes in a very stunning, very beautiful way. Though the people closer to the surface are short, those deeper in the water grow to be gigantic. One of their subspecies includes the Extremophiles, who live in the deepest part of the ocean. They can reach about 20ft in length when counting their tails. It’s unknown weather these Extremophiles age, or what they really do down there. The Dwarves outside of the deepest Abyss usually live in underwater cities, on the coast, or on floating oil rig-type things. They’re all normal.

H. hiems -- ELVES -- Elves are sort of a combination between elves, giants, and general undead creatures (skeletons lol). They’re fucking massive, and live in only the coldest areas. Their skin is usually a shade of grey, tinted by the type of mineral that is the main staple of their diet. They eat rocks. Yeah. In fact, their bodies are so fucked up and adapted to their barren environment that normal food can easily kill them. Sugar specifically is HIGHLY toxic. Because they don’t process food the same way, they’re skeletal. And 12ft tall. Basically, slenderman. Though they aren’t bald. They have pale down-like hair on their heads. They also have another strange diet habit, which developed as a result of food scarcity during the beginning of the apocalypse. They have a very different culture surrounding cannibalism. Though the consumption of entire bodies is Not A Thing anymore, having your loved ones consume small parts of your body after your death is a very important ritual. It is an acknowledgement that the soul has gone, and the body has become empty matter. The other big thing about them is their special Suit Magic, in which a symbol of one of the playing card suits appears somewhere on their body when they go though puberty. The different suits grant them different abilities, and the four suits have divided into factions which were once at war with each other. (Blood (hearts) is healing. Edges (diamonds) creates shield constructs. Blades (spades) is bolts of energy. And Fists (clubs) is bludgeoning-type weapon constructs.) However, Elves are now extremely isolated up in their mountains and tundras. Very territorial. People honestly sort of hate them cause they’re also a little bit specist.

H. invictus -- MONOS -- Mono stands for monochrome. Predictably, Monos are monochrome. Arcane albinism overwrites their natural skin tone, and instead turns them a sickly white color, tinted by their subspecies hue. Everything else on them is jet black, including their blood and organs. Or, it’s that same hue color. They’re really fucked up, honestly. They’re sort of supposed to be a mix between vampires and orcs. They’re an artificially created species, made via eugenics and dark magic. Their creators were aiming to make an unkillable army, and they sort of succeeded, but at the cost of prevalent genetic defects. Around 70% of the Mono population has some sort of disability, which really isn’t a huge problem. They’re more than capable of providing medical care and creating accessibility deceives like prosthetics and magic medicine. You can do crazy shit with technology these days! In fact Monos were engineered to be compatible with tech- oh their creators were fascist eugenicists who abused them and treated them like disposable garbage specifically because of the disabilities they themselves caused though carelessness and forced inbreeding? Well. Alright. Not how I would have done it but... Anyway, long story short, the Monos pulled a 180 at some point and broke free of all that shit. Because they’re sort of a genetic mess, they have really great healthcare out of necessity. They’re the most technologically advanced species on the planet rn, but all of their scientists are engineers and doctors, not warriors, so they’re at constant risk of being annexed by Humans. Monos also have a very low fertility rate, so the percentage of whole-blooded Monos is going way down. They’re close to being endangered at this point. Luckily, some guy figured out how to grow babies in tubes but that’s a story for another day.

H. unicus -- DOWNDEEPERS -- Ok, Downdeepers are just all the miscellaneous designs I came up with that didn’t make sense as one of the other species lol. They’re the decedents of the people who fled to the newly-formed Downdeeps cave system, which is a global system of caverns that goes really fucking deep underground. The high concentrations of magic there cause Downdeepers to mutate rapidly. No two of them are the same. They all just live in tha caves... hell yeah...

The last human species are the CHIMERAS, which are really just the people who are a cross between two or more species. They were rare at first, but they had a population boom after global travel was reestablished (somewhat, anyway).

There are a couple other inorganic races I could talk about but I’m gonna leave it there. Yeah nobody asked for this but I hope you thought it was neat. I am honestly really proud of this world I think it’s cool as hell : ) yeah. And if you’re wondering how all the species can be cohesive despite their ancestors being isolated in different parts of the world (specifically Ogres, who live on every continent and don’t have a common ancestor), that’s because of some meta shit that has to do with how magic and human will interact. Collective subconscious shit. And that would take like 3 pages to explain so like. Just go with it for now lol.

#worldbuilding #cannibalism //#eugenics //

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lizziestudieshistory · 3 years

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Books of 2021 - Mid Year Book Freakout Tag

I haven’t been tagged but I need something to queue while I’m on holiday, and I want to revisit my reading for the first half of this year... Anyway, if you want to do it then consider yourself tagged by me!

1. Best book you’ve read so far in 2021

Okay two answer because I’m one of those people who can’t make a straight forward decision!

Best reread: Assassin’s Apprentice by Robin Hobb - Farseer is technically not Hobb’s best series, but it’s my favourite and Assassin’s Apprentice is my nostalgic favourite within the series. Whenever I read this book it feels like I’m coming home and not many books have managed to make this impression on me.

Best new read: Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgommery - it was hard to choose this one because there were a few I’ve loved but I’m trying not to repeat answers. I’ve loved every adaptation of Anne of Green Gables I’ve seen but I’d not read the book all the way through before, well I managed it this year and fell completely in love. It made me laugh, cry, and feel like a little girl again!

2. Best sequel you've read so far in 2021

The Burning God by R.F. Kuang? - I’ve not read that many sequels this year, not new to me sequals anyway because I spent last year trying to finish my ongoing series... I’ve read a surprising amount of standalones and first books in series though, so I’ll have some by December I suppose. So it’s this one by default.

I did like The Burning God, but it’s the weakest in the Poppy War trilogy and I was slightly disappointed by the ending. As a historian I appreciated the messiness and unsatisfying nature, but as a reader I was left questioning ‘is that it?’ I also have major issues with the structure and pacing of this book, so I’d take this answer with a pinch of salt.

3. New release you haven't read yet, but want to

The Kingdoms by Natasha Pulley - I love Pulley’s writing and this one sounds SO GOOD, I can’t say much more to be honest. Someone remind me to read it if I haven’t by December!

4. Most anticipated release for the second half of the year

The Untold Story by Genevieve Cogman - another one by default... I’m not that up to date on new releases unless it’s from an established author. I need to read 3 books before I can start this one though...

It would be Agatha’s installment in Gail Carriger’s Delightfully Deadly series but I’m not sure if it’s coming out this year or not? I’d be very grateful if anyone knows and would let me know!

5. Biggest disappointment

Again two books because I’ve got a book I hated the most, and one that was a let down - I guess disappointment isn’t hatred but I’m going to give both answers.

Hated: Villette by Charlotte Bronte - I can’t say much more on this than I already have... However, I hated it with every fiber of my being! I was looking forward to Villette, especially as I’m not a fan of the way Bronte framed the romance in Jane Eyre and I was told this one would make up for it. At least with Jane Eyre it felt like Rochester genuinely liked Jane, it wasn’t healthy but I understood it. This one was worse, so that in addition to the appaling writing style and framing has put me off Charlotte Bronte completely - which is a shame because I wanted to complete all the Bronte’s novels before I turn 25... Well at least I still have Anne and Emily!

Let down: Promise of Blood by Brian McClellan - I just didn’t get on with this one, I’m not a fan of action driven fantasy novels, or hard magic systems. The magic felt gimmicky (in a similar style to Mistborn, but less well developed and I didn’t like Allomancy that much...) and the characters fell flat. It’s a book that will, and does, work well for other people but it wasn’t for me.

6. Biggest surprise

The Grisha Trilogy by Leigh Bardugo - I usually dislike YA fantasy, especially earlier series that I missed when I was a teenager. I also typically dislike fantasy that focuses too much on relationship drama... Yet I devoured this one?! I couldn’t stop reading! I’m not going to claim it’s a great piece of literature, however, I had so much fun with it. If you think too hard this series will fall apart at the seems, but it’s a lot of ‘trashy’ fun and incredibly entertaining.

7. Favourite new author (debut or new to you)

Tamzin Merchant!* She could have fallen into the biggest surprise category because I was expecting her prose to be a bit...purple? And the story to be a bit naff - that’s my own prejudice against actors writing novels showing. But this book was a delight to read. To be honest Merchant’s prose was a bit purple BUT it suited the story so well! She knocked it out of the park with her debut children’s story, The Hatmakers, and I’m in love! I can’t wait for the sequel and I suspect I’ll be reading whatever she decided to release.

*I don’t typically like to claim an author as a favourite until I’ve read more than one book by them, however, I’ve not read that many new to me authors this year as I’m reading through my physical tbr. The only other option would be Lara Elena Donnelly but she’s featuring elsewhere! However, Donnelly is another one who astonished me with the quality of her writing, much like Merchant her prose perfectly fits the tone of her series.

8. Newest fictional crush

The Darkling and/or Nikolai from Leigh Bardugo’s Grishaverse - another by default sort of answer, I’m not one for fictional crushes but the Grisha trilogy brought out my inner teenager. These two would have been right up my alley when I was 15. (Now if we’re talking about the Shadow and Bone tv series then Ben Barnes is just... well hot!)

9. Newest favourite character

Again, I can’t just give one answer because characters become favourites for different reasons! (Technically newest would be Cyril and Aristide though)

Cyril DePaul and Artistide Makricosta from Lara Elena Donnelly’s Amberlough Dossier - I can’t accurately describe why I love these two, especially as I’m trying to avoid spoilers, you need to read the book. However, they are truly FABULOUS both together and separately. I’m so invested in them at this point it’s bordering on an obsession. They’re the reason you read these books, and Aristide in particular carries the whole show with his unique blend of vulnarbility, strength, and sass.

Brutha from Terry Pratchett’s Small Gods - Brutha is a character who crept up on me... I started out feeling indifferent about him, but as we saw his unfailing constancy in core personality I came to love Brutha. He went through so much character development and realisation, but he never really changed? To the end he was just Brutha - simple, honest, faithful, and truly good. In the space of a single book Pratchett made me love Brutha as much as I do Death, Granny Weatherwax, and Sam Vimes (who have huge roles to play in Discworld!) The last scene in this book just took my breath away and made me realise just how good Brutha’s character had been. He’s seriously rivalling some of the best written character in the series and I’ve never felt this way about Pratchett’s standalone novels.

10. Book that made you cry

Anne of Green Gables - just one word: Matthew

11. Book that made you happy

How to Marry a Werewolf by Gail Carriger - this is probably my favourite of Carriger’s novellas. and possibly my favourite of her adult novels! I just smiled the whole way through this one, which is exactly what I want from Carriger who is my ultimate comfort read author.

12. Most beautiful book you've bought so far this year (or received)

The Amberlough Dossier by Lara Elena Donnelly - just LOOK at these gorgeous covers! They also really suit the tone of this series - the whole thing is stunning really.

13. What books do you need to read by the end of the year?

What don’t I need to read? A few urgent reads:

A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine

Lord of Emperors by Guy Gavriel Kay

Master of Sorrows by Justin Call

Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

The Painted Man by Peter V. Brett

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

#mid year book freak out tag #books of 2021 #books #bookish discussion #qeued post #I'm not tagging all of these

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neuxue · 4 years

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Wheel of Time liveblogging: Towers of Midnight ch 9

Mat catches up with an old friend. Or an old not-friend catches up with Mat.

Chapter 9: Blood in the Air

Well it opens with Mat literally screaming bloody murder, so we’re off to a good start.

He threw himself backward to his feet, hauling the ashandarei up, then spun and slashed—not at the form moving through the tent towards him, but at the wall.

I don’t know why this is so amusing to me, but I’m laughing at the ashandarei being used once again in conjunction with a rather unconventional exit, given that it was granted to him in the first place as, I’m fairly sure, part of his request to be out of the land of the Eelfinn. And then going back for it almost stopped him being able to leave Ebou Dar.

Anyway, somehow he then manages to pull the medallion off his neck and tie it to the blade of the ashandarei all before the inhumanly fast gholam can catch up. Sounds fake but okay.

Though apparently it’s still trying to avoid notice, and also is not immune to a little bit of villainous monologuing, so okay I suppose that buys a little bit of time for some speedy knotwork.

“The one who now controls me wants you more than anyone else. I am to ignore all others until I have tasted your blood.”

I mean, I’m not sure if the gholam plays by the same rules as Aes Sedai but there’s definitely some wiggle room in that command. Just have a quick taste and then you two can be friends. Or Mat can keep it as a pet, depending on how we’re defining personhood.

Or sparring partner? Could be useful to have something absurdly fast and virtually invincible to train against.

Mat agrees on the fighting point, at least, and goes for the attack, because I’m sure this will end well.

Really? Of all the people this thing has killed, including some of your friends and members of the Band, Tylin is the one you’re upset about? Sigh. Fine. That’s a dead horse I don’t particularly need to beat any further, I suppose.

“You didn’t want her; you wanted me!”

Well technically Mat didn’t want her either so they have something in common there.

Okay, sorry, couldn’t resist one last dig.

“A bird must fly. A man must breathe. I must kill.”

That’s a mood. Points for self-awareness, I suppose, though in this series that’s a pretty low bar.

How is the gholam controlled, I wonder? I don’t see this happening, but given that it seems to serve a single master rather than the Shadow in general, it would be cool if there were a way to suborn it to Mat’s will instead, and unleash it on the Shadow’s own armies. That would fulfil its need to kill, and it would actually sort of fit with its dark-trickster kind of nature. But I doubt it.

“I’ve been told to kill them all,” the gholam said softly. “To bring you out.”

Someone needs to give this thing a copy of the Evil Overloard List. Though in fairness I suppose this is less ‘revealing its plans via monologue’ and more ‘delivering a rather chilling threat, given that it knows everyone’s identity’.

And also as a distraction because Mat hesitates for just a second on realising that it knows about Tuon, so all in all a pretty effective gambit.

Or it would be, if not for Teslyn, because she’s still surprisingly awesome. Lifting Mat out of the way with Air—because he’s no longer wearing his medallion and the gholam can’t be affected by the One Power—is some pretty damn clever quick thinking.

And then she attacks it with a chair. Iconic. Is that three times now that chairs have been used as improvised weapons in this series? Four? Whatever the number, I sort of love it. Especially because the image is hilarious every single time.

The object—a chair!—crashed into the hillside beside them. The gholam spun as a large bench smashed into it, throwing it backwards.

This invincible creature of Shadow and nightmare, immune to magic and virtually impossible to fight, being hit by flying furniture.

Credit again to Teslyn though, for immediately coming up with pretty much the only way she could possibly help in this fight. Sure, she’s had time to figure out the loopholes with Mat’s medallion so it’s not completely on the fly, but that’s still some impressive adaptability and problem-solving right there.

Seems the gholam is still avoiding attention, though, because it runs off, pausing only to tear out a pair of throats for good measure on the way.

And now Mat remembers the bloody murder in his own tent that started it all, which turns out to be Lopin, and two random NPCs. Aw, poor Lopin, he just wanted to do laundry in peace.

The gholam had proven itself practically unstoppable. Mat had the suspicion that it could cut down the entire Band in getting to him, if it needed to.

This, and honestly this entire scene, seems very deliberately placed to basically remind us that the gholam is still an unsolved problem. A bit of tag-you’re-it (murder tag? That’s a game, right?), popping up to tear some throats and then run off again, because Our Protagonist hasn’t yet worked out an actual solution but clearly now he needs to.

Which of course begs the question: what is the solution here? How do you defeat something faster and stronger than you are, that also happens to be invincible to magic and indestructible but for a single known weakness?

I suppose that single known weakness, then, should be the starting point here. Which—oh. Mat’s in Caemlyn. And he hasn’t been able to get in touch with Elayne yet, but… Elayne is also in Caemlyn. And knows how to replicate and make ter’angreal. Could she possibly make a weaponised version of Mat’s foxhead medallion? One that could kill rather than maim? Or make copies of it?

Except she can’t even channel reliably at the moment, and also I’m not sure how well she’d be able to study a ter’angreal that by its very nature blocks the use of the One Power on it, so that could present something of a challenge. Still, it’s pretty much the only idea I have.

Unless you could trap the gholam somewhere? Lure it through a gateway? Leash it with the medallion like Gollum with the elvish rope and drag it to the Tower of Ghenjei as a gift for the Aelfinn and Eelfinn?

Hey I’m just tossing out ideas here.

Mat’s worried about Olver, but apparently he’s fine; I suppose it was too much to ask that the gholam might have got to him. Okay, okay, fine, sorry, I’m a terrible person etc. I just… really could not give less of a shit about this kid if I tried, but I suppose that’s a me problem.

Seems like the gholam’s diversifying its skillset, getting into the interrogation business as well as the murder and vampirism one. Always good to have a fallback, I suppose, especially in this economy.

“We’re going to hunt it,” Mat said softly, “and we’re going to kill the bloody thing.”

Cool, sounds fun, what’s the plan? Oh! Maybe you could dissolve the medallion and then inject it into someone’s bloodstream and then get the gholam to eat it…

Sorry, I’ll stop.

Well no, I won’t, but.

“Burn me, I still need to talk to Elayne. I want Aludra’s dragons started. I’ll have to write her another letter. Stronger, this time.”

This does feel like a setup for Elayne helping with the gholam problem somehow via her ter’angreal abilities and Mat’s medallion, given the intersection of all these people and places and events.

Also, Elayne does have a history with multiple letters of varying strength, so I am sort of entertained by the notion of her being on the receiving end this time. And if an epistolary version of Elayne and Mat’s weird friendship is all I get, I’ll take it.

Mat’s plan for now involves sleeping in town in a different inn each night, so… you’d better hope the gholam’s orders regarding avoiding notice don’t change, Mat, or you’re going to end up with a hell of a lot of blood tangentially on your hands. I mean, I’m all for it in the name of self-preservation, but Mat’s a better person than I am.

Oh hi Joline. Can’t say it’s good to see you, and you know it’s bad when Mat and I agree on something. Though she’s come to say her goodbyes, so at least I don’t have to put up with a) her and b) Mat in her proximity anymore.

Mat’s last few lines in this chapter feel… a little more like TGS Mat than like the Mat of the rest of the series, but I can forgive that; it’s a pretty small slip and the rest of this chapter and last have, indeed, been better than last book.

Next (ToM ch 10) Previous (ToM ch 8)

#a short chapter?! in MY wheel of time?! it's apparently more likely than you think!#Wheel of Time #neuxue liveblogs WoT #Towers of Midnight #probably could have combined this with last chapter #oh well too late now

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beneaththetangles · 3 years

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Seven AU Spinoffs I’d Rather Watch Than the New Oregairu OVA

Oregairu fans erupted over the recent news that a new OVA was on the way, to be bundled with the game for season three of the series. To tell the truth, I’m not completely sure what the OVA will be about. Will it follow the others and cover light novel material that didn’t make it into the TV season? Will it be original? Or will it adapt the newly written material from Watari, which has been derided by some as a harem cash-grab? I don’t know, and though I will watch it, I’m don’t really care much where the story goes. It’s run it’s course. I’d much rather having something more original, like say, a spinoff series.

Below are seven ideas for spinoffs from Oregairu. Most, however, are not traditional ones—they’re more like alternate universe series, taking the same characters and in varying degrees, their backgrounds and relationships, and placing them in new situations. I would die to get even one of these. Watari-sensei and all you folks that make anime happen, are you listening?

Ahem, anyway. Let’s get started:

Free Kick! — The Hayama series

Hayato Hayama is the most popular kid in school—athletic, smart, conscientious, and rich. In fact, his parents are pushing him toward taking over the family business (a conglomerate), and expect their always-respectful son to accept that he’ll need to drop out of soccer in preparation. But this time, he’s not going to be “Everybody’s Hayato.” Supported by his best friend, the outlandish and clueless Tobe, irascible team manager Iroha, tennis ace and love interest Miura, and a brand new cast of characters, Hayato is going to try to make his dreams come true by reaching nationals and going pro. And if that sounds trite, it’s not—everything is on the line, thanks to his frenemy (and another possible love interest?), Haruno, who brokers a deal with Hayato’s parents—win the entire championship, or drop soccer and his friends forever.

I’m a Fujoshi (But I Don’t Want These Boys to Kiss) — The Ebina series

Hina Ebina is free! Out of the bonds of having to “play a role” in high school, she’s happy about her college life, where she can show the world her love for all things yaoi, beginning by joining the anime club. And things are progressing perfectly, as she finds that the club is full of hot guys, and she’s been named vice president, behind only the mysterious and rarely sighted club president. So, basically, she has free reign to make it the yaoi hangout of her dreams! But things go haywire the very next day when Ebina discovers that the beautiful boys have sabotaged her, leaving her on the hook for their misdeeds as they branch off into a different club, leaving Ebina to clean up the trash with only a group of slovenly, male misfits. Can she turn the club around, keep track of these otaku members, and realize her yaoi-est of dreams? It could be that all these goals are connected to that mysterious president…

Iroha and Komachi: Junior Star☆Detectives

Bonded by their mutual love for the latter’s brother, Iroha and Komachi can’t otherwise stand each other. Iroha is a little too manipulative and worldly for Komachi’s tastes, and Komachi is too “real” and no-nonsense for Iroha. But when chance brings the two together to track down a cat-napper, and they successfully do so to the tune of a 50,000 yen reward, the pair decide that their mutual strengths outweigh their differences, and start a detective agency! Aided by the surprising wisdom of the gentle tennis student athlete, Totsuka and the gumption of over-eager Taishi, and under the guidance of the kind but sharp Meguri-sempai, the two will take any case, from the most mundane to those that stretch their wits and put them in utmost peril—as long as they get back before closing time and their coffee and macaron sandwich.

Great Teacher Hiratsuka (GTH)

Shizuka Hiratsuka’s life is starting to spiral. As she transitions to a new school, she’s grieving about leaving her most recent group of students, with whom she was particularly close, and at a recent wedding is once again reminded that she’s virtually the last of her group of college friends who remains single. Not to mention that her new school is the roughest of the roughest, a place with the lowest graduation rates in the country and renowned for gang violence, reflected in how the study body treats her car on the first day of class. When it seems that she’s about to explode (or at least get drunk…again), she finally meets the school principal—a certain blonde (with hair still obviously dyed…it should be gray by now), and in the most unexpected of ways, finds the motivation to teach this group of lost cause kids and maybe once again find a meaning in her own life that’s not connected to her relationship status.—though it seems that good things sometimes come to those who wait.

My Middle School Life is Miserable, As I Expected — The Rumi series

Rumi Tsurumi’s middle school life was supposed to be better than elementary, she thought. She tried, she really did, but once again found herself on the outside looking in. But that’s how it is, she realized. I’m just a loner and don’t really want to be a part of all this meaningless chatter and those fragile relationships anyway, which is precisely when the unthinkable happens—the most popular boy in school confesses to her! As predicted, it’s a cruel joke, but what happens next wasn’t something Rumi could foretell: A tough, quiet boy and goofy, talkative girl from her class, people whose names she barely knew, stand up for her. Could it be that a new school life is on the horizon? Well, with the weirdos being attracted to this new group of friends, it’ll still be miserable, as expected. Also featuring Orimoto, because why not (preach!), this series is a true spin-off of the original.

Rewriting Myself as the Protagonist Hero in Another World! — The Zaimokuza / Saki series

College did not go well for Yoshiteru Zaimokuza. Failing the creative writing class he assumed he would ace, ridiculed by fellow anime club members, and otherwise not fitting at all into university life, he dropped out after just one semester. Now, the only time Zaimokuza goes out is to eat at his favorite ramen place where a former classmate, Saki Kawasaki, works while putting herself through school. On the way home from dinner one day, the unthinkable (actually totally thinkable) happens when Zaimokuza is hit by a bus, and awakens in a fantasy land that seems strangely like his light novel draft. However, this protagonist wakes up back in his own world—it seems his rather large body absorbed the bus’ blow and he survived. But now, every time he completes another chapter, Zaimokuza returns to the alternate world, though things aren’t exactly as he had planned due to some inconsistencies in his writing, and rules have started to come into place that don’t make this quite a fairy land (it also seems to be missing the heroine character he wrote). When Saki picks up the novel that he leaves behind, she finds herself also dragged into the world, one that she wants no part of.

From Sky to Heart — The Yui series

Yui Yuigahama is Miss Popular, but she’s not happy. Everything seems so fake—most of all, as the only boy in the school who throws shade at her states, her. While walking home one day, she chases a funny looking rodent into a field where she begins to fall…upward, finding herself in a world full of anthropomorphic animals, with the rodent offering her a chance to make her life into “something genuine.” Yui takes it and finds herself in a world of adventure where she’s able to free humans and creatures alike from the physical manifestations of maladies that are haunting them. And as she finds meaning in her life, Yui also develop real friendships with other fighters that have their own tales, and finds one boy particular in romantic pursuit of her, though that mean boy from real life? He likes the changes he’s seeing in her, too. Hopefully, Yui can keep these lives separate…it’s not like boy #1 is going to transfer into school with her and boy #2, right? Right?

=====

If you want to watch the real Oregairu, it’s currently streaming on Crunchyroll. The light novel from which its adapted, My Youth Comedy is Wrong, As I Expected, is available through Yen Press.

#Anime #Oregairu #Yahari Ore no Seishun Love Comedy wa Machigatteiru.#My Teen Romantic Comedy SNAFU #My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As I Expected #Articles #Author: TWWK

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warrioreowynofrohan · 4 years

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On The Lord of the Rings Movies

I have very mixed feelings on on Peter Jackson’s The Lord of the Rings movies.

On the one hand, the amount of knowledge and thought and work and love that went into these movies is absolutely phenomenal. The settings, the costumes, the props, the casting, are all pretty much perfect, and unbelievably detailed, and it’s very clear that many of the people who worked on them were passionate Tolkien fans. In terms of all the visuals, they’ve done an amazing job of bringing Tolkien’s world to life, and that’s something we would never have without them.

On top of that, there’s the music. It’s really impossible to be effusive enough about Howard Shore’s score. Everything about it feels like the books. The strength and complexity of the leitmotifs and the way they’re varied according to a scene’s mood, and the emotional power of them - it’s an absolute masterpiece.

(It makes me want a Silmarillion adaptation just so he could score it. Can you imagine the music for the Return of the Noldor? Starting off the Fëanor’s theme, something really powerful and inspirational, and then gradually weaving elements of Morgoth’s theme into it, subtly at the first to the point that it’s not consciously noticed, but growing from Tirion to Alqualondë to Losgar and pulling the audience along on the same emotional journey as the Noldor, where you start with fire and passion and drive and purpose and are left with ash and shock and regrets.)

The acting, too, is exceptional, especially from the main cast, and the amount of work and dedication and passion they brought to it is staggering. And that’s before even getting into the roles of the size doubles and all the massive production challenges concerned with that, which they managed so seamlessly that it’s not even noticeable in the final product.

Most of the changes that they made, I can understand, even when I don’t like them. They mainly flow from two cinematic needs: streamlining, and emphasizing.

Streamlining means removing what they need to (Bombadil, the Scouring of the Shire) in order to fit the plot into three movies that function effectively as cinema. I love the Scouring of the Shire, but the book of ROTK is one-third denoument, with the climax squarely in the middle, tryung to write the third movie of a trilogy in that way and have it be effective would be extraordinarily difficult. This is also why we ger Elves at Helm’s Deep - the film doesn’t have appendices to mention the Battles of Lórien, so this change means the audience doesn’t feel the Elves are inactive in the conflict.

Emphasizing means, mainly, that conflicts are strengthened. The Council of Elrond goes from an information-sharing meeting with some mild disagreement to a shouting match; the Ents intially refuse to act, and the Entmoot is treated as frustrating delay rather than meaningful consideration; possible divisions between Rohan and Gondar are played up; and, most-criticized, Faramir and Denethor’s characters are seriously modified. All of this heightens the audience’s sense of crisis. The change to Faramir emphasizes the danger and power of the Ring more than would be the case if only Boromir, Gollum and Frodo were seriously tempted. Denethor is written as being wrong, in blth the books and movies, but the movies have less time and focus to devote to a side character when so many other character and plot arcs are going on. (The changes to Elrond’s character are made for similar reasons.) I don’t like all these changes, and I think some of them could have bern done differently and better, but I do see understandable reasons behind them.

But the one thing I cannot get past is that they changed the scene on the Steps of Cirith Ungol, one of the most beautiful and emotional and tragic scenes in the entire book, and flipped it on its head. Jackson’s view for ROTK that Frodo trusted Gollum due to the malign influence of the Ring, and that Gollum was unreachable at that point, is a misunderstanding of the most crucial themes of the books. Frodo knew Gollum might betray them; he followed him anyway because they had few options and because he understood Gollum as no one else did; Gollum did care for Frodo to the extent that he was still capable of caring about anyone; and showing mercy and compassion to Gollum was not a mistake, it was the right action on which the success of the entire Quest ultimately hung. There was never any possibility of Frodo sending Sam away, or of Sam leaving him. The scene and the whole plot around it hinges not just on a deep misunderstanding of all three characters, but a deep misunderstanding of the moral core of the entire story.

This is why I can rewatch the first two movies and enjoy many parts of them, but I can rarely get through a rewatch of ROTK.

My acceptance of variation in adaptations and fanworks of Tolkien’s writings has gone way up since I discovered the online Tolkien fandom in the last few years. It’s all sub-creation in its own way. And the movies give us many wonderful things that we would never have had without them (Howard Shore’s score! the imagery of the Shire! Khazad-dum! Ian McKellan’s Gandalf!).

But ROTK in particular made me feel that Jackson had captured all of the external details of the book, and lost their soul.

#tolkien #the lord of the rings #lord of the rings movies #frodo #sam #gollum

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diamondcamefromhell · 4 years

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Timeless love

Jaskier x female!reader part 4

[PART 1] [PART 2] [PART 3]

Summary: This is an AU, where Y/N is a young woman, trying to make ends meet with her freelancing writing job. She lives in her small Nottingham studio apartment along with her cat Apollo. Things change when one evening as she is waiting for her taxi, she meets what she thinks is Joey Batey, but the man in front of her is convinced he’s Jaskier, a character from her current favorite show. Y/N now has to figure out what to do.

Warnings: Swearing

Word count: 2,124

A/N: first of all, thank u for positive reviews and kind comments on this story so far, again, it is kind of a slow burner, everything is moving slowly but this is what the story really is, as its taking place in our world, where no dragons or strigas exist and the biggest monsters are, well.. humans? ya kno

but anyways, any and all feedback is appreciated <3

I have to cut our loses. We spend a good hour outside, wondering around my apartment building. But we find nothing, not even a smallest hint of what happened to make Jaskier end up here. The bard stays quiet for most of the search, as I can tell he is still very much worried about me.

He only speaks when he sees a car pass by, as it startles him so much he immediately jumps behind me. I explain to him what it is, or try to, and he relaxes a little. Still flinching whenever a car goes by, though.

We rush inside, before Dave decides to visit again, as I lock the door. Apollo comes to greet us, meowing, but I ignore my friend, as anxiety washes over me and I can barely contain it. I know my companion feels it, as he glues himself to me, following my every step as I rush to the kitchen.

I see Jaskier sit at the couch again, not saying anything. I want to break the silence, but know my voice would shake, and I didn’t want to worry him even more. I throw some toast in the toaster, I will offer him a meal as an apology. I put butter and cinnamon on toast, bringing it to him. I set the plate on the coffee table, sitting down.

“I’m sorry.” I apologize, as the man looks at me. I can’t put my finger on it, but his expression makes me feel weird.

“Don’t be, I over-stepped.” I shake my head, pressing my lips together. I am willing to swallow a bit of my pride for this man.

“No Jaskier. I just… I made a promise. To the stars.” I close my eyes, scared of him judging me. This way, at least I don’t have to see it. “That I would make it on my own. Whatever that it may be. I don’t like it when people help me or try to be nice to me. Makes me feel… weak.”

“But everyone needs help from time to time.” There is no judgement in his voice, so I open my eyes. He gives me a kind smile, as Apollo jumps in my lap, purring. “You are helping me, does it mean I am weak?”

“No.” I say, biting the inside of my mouth, trying to stop the water works from leaking.

“Then why are you weak, if I help you a little?” I can’t answer that, so I just look down, at my cat, who is now napping, soundly. He has a point. “You’re being unfair on yourself. Allow me to say this, Y/N, even my great friend Geralt needs help sometimes. And he’s the bloody Witcher. It does not make him any weaker, if anything, it shows strength.”

“I know.” My voice shakes a little, as I wipe my nose. My eyes may be dry, but nose was runny. “It’s just, I prefer to be alone.”

“I used to say that.” His mind drifts far away. I cant help but admire how beautiful he manages to look. “But I hated nothing more than being alone.”

“I have Apollo.” I argue. He sighs, looking at me.

“Y/N.” He speaks to me like I am a child. We lock eyes, and I see so much care in his gaze, I want to run away. But I stay. “You need people.”

“Either way.” I say, ignoring him. I am barely holding back the tears. “Eat your meal. I have something to show you.”

I spring to my feet. Showing him moving pictures may be a good enough distraction for now. Introducing him to some of the great Internet, so we can avoid the sensitive topics. I look down to see my hands still shaking, so I rush to the bathroom.

There I see Jaskier clothes in a pile on the floor. I sigh, folding them, as tears escape my eyes. I turn on the faucet, making sure the bard can’t hear my heavy breaths and sniffling. It takes me a couple of minutes of crying to clam down. I wash my face, avoiding looking in the mirror. I stop the faucet and flush the toilet, purely because I am scared to go out just yet.

When I do, however, he doesn’t look at me, and I feel relieved. I rush to the bed, grabbing my laptop, soon landing next to him. Our legs touch and I feel the build up static shock me, so I jump back. He giggles, but I ignore that, opening up the computer, entering my password in a quick move.

One glance at him, and I see how mesmerized he is, my heart feels like it will burst. I take a couple deep breaths, wondering what I could show him.

YouTube and Netflix both were dangerous, as they could have his show on the main page, I still bite the bullet, turning the screen from his eyes, going to youtube. As expected, my feed is filled with recommended videos from Joey Batey. I stare at Jaskier for a moment, wondering if somehow he could be Joey, just very confused and lost one. But then I remember the Instagram story, and know I’m grasping at straws.

I search for cat videos, not sure what else to show him. What would interest a man who thinks he is from a fantasy world?

“Look.” I say, pressing play. It seems like his eyes are about to fall out as he stares at the screen, I giggle landing my hand on his. “Relax.”

“What is this magic?” I pause the video, pulling my hand away. Our eyes meet.

“This, Jask, is video. Moving pictures, if you will.” He still seems confused. “We have these things called cameras, that can take not-moving images of a moment, so you can cherish it, or can take moving things, like this cat video. There is even more, people create characters and stories and film them.”

“Do you have a camera?” I nod, putting laptop on the table, as I rush to get my Canon. I come back, turning it on. I decide to use the view finder. I sit next to him. “Here.”

“How do I use it?” He asks, twisting it around, before he begins staring at the screen.

I explain. Then he takes some pictures, of my room, me, my laptop and Apollo. I take some of him, and we even try to take some together, as we both laugh, trying to fit in that small space.

Then I show him some films. I start with my personal favourite and a classic – Titanic. Stopping whenever he get’s to confused, explaining things. We move to more and more films, only taking a break when we both get hungry.

I take the chance and sacrifice my wallet and order us some pizza, which he seems to like. He tries his first fizzy drink, Sprite, and at first he hates it, but I see him sip it more and more as the day progresses.

It keeps up for a couple of weeks. We spend days watching movies as he slowly learns more about the way my world works. We spend some of my savings as I order different take out, but eventually he helps me cook some dinner for us. He slowly, but surely adapts.

Until it all crashes down.

I go to use the bathroom, leaving Jaskier at the laptop. When I come out, however, he is on his feet, anxiously walking around. I stop, my heart dropping to my feet. I see Joey’s face on the screen. No, not his.

I see Jaskier. A video of him, in the tavern, signing.

He probably went to YouTube And found a video of himself. And a whole lot of questions.

My gaze goes from the screen, to the man, who has stopped pacing, and now is staring at me. His eyes burn, as I see betrayal written all over it. I don’t know what he even thinks is going on and I don’t know how I can explain it to him.

“Jaskier, please.” I point to the couch, but he just shakes his head. I put my hands behind my back, so he wouldn’t see them shake.

“What does that mean?” He asks, as his voice breaks. I feel my heart shatter.

“Please, sit down.” I try to plea, my voice slightly shaky.

“Just tell me what it means!” I flinch at his yell, fighting back the tears. No matter how much it hurts me, I know that he was hurting so much more.

“I don’t know.” I say, and that is the honest truth. His shoulders hang low. “Jaskier, I don’t know.”

“I’m a character.” His voice fills with disgust, as a sudden rush of bravery washes over me. I step to him, grabbing his shoulders.

“You’re so much more than that. You’re here.” I plead again, forcing him to look at me. “You’re you.”

“I’m not even real.” He hisses, escaping my grip. I wrap my hands around myself, as I continue staring at him, as he walks around. Looking for something, anything probably. Wanting things to make sense.

“Then am I crazy and just imagining you? Dave saw you too, Jaskier.” I raise my voice, which makes him stop pacing. Our eyes meet. “You are as real as me. This world just isn’t yours. How that happened, I don’t know, and we will get you home.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” There is so much hurt in his voice that I want to hide under my bed. Run away. Escape. But I choose to stay, for him.

“There is no easy way to say something like this. I don’t even know what this is!” My voice cracks, and that makes Jaskier’s expression soften a little. The storm is passing. “Yes, I recognized you as Joey because he plays you. But you are more than Jaskier we can see on tv. You’re more.”

“Y/N.” Tears escape and that completely washes any and all anger the bard might have had. He comes to me, pulling me towards himself, until we are in an embrace.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you.” I sheepishly say, as he rubs my back. “Hiding it wasn’t right. But explaining this… it’s just unexplainable.”

“I can’t expect you to have all the answers.” I shake my head, as he hugs me tighter. I hear him sigh. “I’m sorry. I scared you. You were trying to protect me.”

“You had a right to be mad.” I say, as tears finally seem to stop. I wipe my eyes and nose to my sleeve, but Jaskier doesn’t let me go just yet.

“You’ve been nothing, but kind to me. You gave me a home.” He lands a kiss on my forehead, as my heart melts. “I should be thanking you.”

He now lets me go. I wrap my hands around me, as I watch him go to the laptop, give it one final look, as he closes it. My heart breaks and I know he probably will look at it more. When I leave him alone, or at night. He will hurt himself more but he will never show me.

Because he knows it would hurt me too.

“When you said who you were, Jask, I didn’t believe it. I’ve seen the show. That’s how I knew about Geralt and Yen.” I confess, as he looks at me. His face expressionless. “That’s also why it was so easy to take you home. It felt like I knew you. Because if you were who you said you are… I’ve seen you. You were already part of my world.”

“You liked me?” He asks, crossing his arms. I can’t help but smile.

“I did. You were truly my favourite.” That makes him smirk, but his eyes remain sad. “Getting to know you, only furthers that.”

“I want to watch the show.” He says, and I knew he would. I bite inside of my mouth, as I think about it.

“I can’t stop you from watching your own story, Jask.” I say, hugging myself tighter. “I cant try and protect you anymore.”

“Watch it with me.” Our eyes lock as my heart skips a beat. He seems so sad and scared.

“Of course.” I say, swallowing back more tears.

So we watch it. We watch his story unfold. I avoid looking at him during these eight hours, scared of what he may look like. After the finale, I pause the show before another one starts. There is silence between us as I finally look at him.

He has tears in his eyes, and for a second time today, I feel my heart shatter.

[PART FIVE]

~~~~~~~~~~

TAG LIST [if you want to be added or removed from this list, let me know <3]

@ultracolorfulnerdcollection ; @viyamystic ; @sleepyblossom ; @killjoy-acid-crash ; @halszka-potter <33

#timeless love #jaskier x reader #jaskier au #witcher au #slowburner #jaskier angst #not much fluff #but its coming #joey batey #kinda??#its weird #idk what tags to use #either works #please enjoy #lots of love

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fairydust-stuff · 4 years

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Wendy Darling Embodiment of Motherhood

Here’s the thing ,I have never been a big fan of Wendy Darling from JM Barrie’s classic novel Peter Pan. Not only is she a cocktail of every bad stereotype about Victorian women casually thrown into a blender to make the ultimate Grimm’s fairy tale heroines are more bad ass then you smoothie. But Wendy is just straight up the most boring character in Peter Pan. That being said she does play a very important role in Peter Pan. Also it’s gotten the point where I’m a bit tired of seeing this idea that the Never land ladies have nothing to offer. If we don’t change everything about them or let’s just leave them out entirely trend via Hollywood. Seriously when is the last time Tink got more than a cameo and I’m not talking about the sugary princess clone Disney created from her mutilated body. Anyway I want to take a look Wendy Darling how she works, how she doesn’t work what she embodies and how she’s been portrayed in various adaptations.

First let’s take a look at some themes. Peter pan is at its core a coming of age story about accepting the inevitability of growing up. However Wendy as a point of view character is kind of an odd choice for this theme. In the original novel Wendy brings a flower to her mother who declares “Why can’t you stay like this” Then the narrator proceeds to talk about how Wendy knew she must grow up. So we already have a character who accepts the fact she must grow up on page one. In fact Wendy doesn’t run away to Never land as much as take a holiday, and to be fair John and Michel suffer from the same problem. Honestly I think the closest thing we get to a character arch in the novel is George Darling who is a seriously underrated character in my opinion. So Wendy just never struggles with growing up. However another theme of Peter Pan is motherhood and oh boy does Wendy fit into that.

“She used to come to me in my and I’d say pretty mother, now she has come and I’ve shot her” Tootles laments after thinking he shot and killed Wendy. Even Hook want to take Wendy to be the mothers of himself and his crew in typical pirate fashion coveting what Peter Pan and the lost boys have Wendy becomes a treasure for them to steal. Smee when carrying Wendy even promises “I’ll save you if you promise to only be my Mother” Every boy and man child in Never land craves a mother and want Wendy to fill the position. Wendy taking on the role turns her into a kind of ideal in the eyes of everyone in Never land even her own brothers get in on the treating her as the perfect mom.

In fact Wendy only gets to be a little girl in the narrative when Hook offers his hand to her and she takes it and only because the narrative felt the need to defend her submission to her own capture. But looking back that may very well be the point when you look at Wendy and Peter’s relationship without the shipping googles it’s actually quite interesting. You’ve got two pre teen’s on two different wave lengths. Wendy states in the novel “Peter what are true feelings towards me?” and is displeased with Peter’s answer “That of a devoted son” this seems up their relationship perfectly. Wendy uses the role of mother to try to basically become Peter’s wife something which he is deeply uncomfortable with needing constant reassurance that playing an adult couple is “ Only make believe” now whether or not Peter is flat out not interested or scared of his own feelings is up for debate. I personally lean toward the former because Peter is constantly surrounded by busty topless mermaids who like to flirt with him. So if he hasn’t had his sexual awakening yet it’s not happening ever, but the point is Peter uses the reaffirmation of Wendy as Mother to keep her at a distance. When Wendy returns home Miss Darlings offers to adopt Peter which he refuses. This highlights the fact when given the chance to have an actual mother he doesn’t want one.

Wendy is a reflection of Peter’s warped relationship with motherhood. He confesses to Wendy that he did at one point did return to his mother only to find the window barred and “There was another little boy sleeping in my bed!” It could be argued Peter’s desire to stay a little boy forever actually steam from the fear of abandonment and being replaced. This shapes Peter’s relationship with Wendy in sense he wants a mother he can actually control. One who never makes him feels too grown up or who challenges him or his choices in a meaningful way. This shows that motherhood is important and that without a proper mom boys will never truly grow into men.

Wendy plays a similar role to the lost boys only she actually ends up helping them. While the lost boys clearly already have mommy craving’s Wendy gives them a taste of what having a mom is actually like or at least what an ideal mom from a Victorian upper middle class family structure would be like. So when Wendy wants to go home the lost boys who getting a taste of what their missing decides to go with her. Where they get adopted into the Darling Family and grow into respectable members of society who all get boring office jobs in the prolog which completely contrast their colorful energetic personalities, moving on. Wendy acts as kind of encouraging benevolent guide for the lost boys and Peter her inevitable goal being to encourage to move beyond the superficial trappings of childhood and take a step forward into adulthood. Peter is the failure, deficient as the novel itself states but the lost boys are a triumph of the power of proper maternal nurturing.

Wendy Darling has appeared in various adaptations and Spin offs though I’m mostly going to focus on Movies and TV because most of the Peter Pan book retellings where Wendy plays a key role just do not fill me with any positive feelings. And I want to mostly focus on the good today with some casual snark thrown in.

So let’s start with Wendy from the 2003 Peter Pan Live Action adaptation. I love this version it makes changes from the novel while still paying homage by using actual lines from the book. Though I have very mixed feelings about 2003 Wendy.

The movie heavily leans into the annoying I’m not like other girls trope. Here Victorian lady Wendy turns fairy tales into gore fests, and has an interest in sword play and pirates. I’m not saying girls from that era can’t have those interests but it just feels like their Wendy is the product of listening to too many focus groups not to mention she learns to be an expert sword fighter who can go toe to toe with adults after five seconds with Peter. And what is with the sudden unexplained blood thirst? Where did that come from?

Though I do like how the film unlike the novel actually gave Wendy an arch. Wendy’s aunt is mortified at her niece’s interest in becoming a novelist who travels the world. She insists Wendy’s parents separate Wendy from her brothers and allow her to tutor, Wendy to teach her how to be a proper lady. They also have a school teacher shame Wendy for drawing a picture of Peter flying above her bed. This seems to be subtext for the Victorian shaming of sexual expression from girls as dirty and shameful. This actually makes Wendy feel like her life is changing way too fast and it scares her. Since she is twelve and her family is already talking about marriage prospects. While the scene where Peter and her meet is pretty much played like in the novel. There’s the added moment of Peter whispering in Wendy’s ear “ Forget them Wendy Forget them all come with me and we’ll never ever have to think about grown up things again” which unlike the novel frames Wendy as running away from growing up.

Then she develops a crush on Peter Pan and this being Hollywood they go with the scared of his own feeling interpretation. I guess her whining and screaming his name for a day was just too sexy to resist. Wendy contemplates joining Hook’s crew because when your crush rejects you validation by pirate man children is good salve for your wounds. But then realizes she can’t remember her mother and much like the novel becomes scared that her and her brothers have forgotten their parents. Then they all get kidnapped by the pirates and Hook and Peter have a show down which is way better than the novel because here Hook attacks Peter’s abandonment issues and actually brings him to his knees. But then Wendy kisses Peter and he gains the strength to defeat Hook. Basically the implication is Wendy realizes growing up is ok because romantic love is a thing. Hey, I didn’t say it was a great arch but it’s more than the novel gave her or anyone. I’m not a huge fan of this Wendy depiction but I’ve got to take my hat off to the writers for at least giving Wendy a coming of age narrative.

Disney’s classic Peter Pan pulled a similar move taking the focus from Peter and putting it entirely on Wendy. The implications at the end imply that Wendy’s adventure was all a dream and that Tinker bell and Tiger Lilly were reflections of her own manifesting sexuality. Peter Pan her desire not to grow up and Hook I’m going to guess that he was her daddy issues.

I actually think Walt did Wendy a solid in her characterization. This is one of the few Wendy’s were her concern for her brothers and the lost boys don’t feel tacked on. Since most adaptations do very little to build Wendy’s dynamic with the other kids. Here it’s in every face wipe and tearful good bye and every “Do be careful” thrown over Wendy’s shoulder.

Also the Disney movie does a one eighty from everyone in Neverland worshiping her to Neverland treating her rather badly. It takes Wendy’s annoyance from called her squaw from the Novel and has the Indians bully her into fetching firewood instead of joining the celebrations. Also the mermaids not only try to drown her but Peter thinks is all a big joke. Disney’s Wendy constantly stands up for herself but often gets brushed off or forced to walk the plank. In this version you can one hundred percent understand why Wendy is so done with this place and ready to grow up. Here the reality of what it’s like to experience everyone acting like a self-centered child is here on full display.

Also Disney’s Wendy is not perfect she gets angry and loses her temper attacking mermaids or yelling at Indians. She gets jealous of Tiger Lilly being all over Peter and is sour towards him. Wendy is dreamy eyed, and polite but this version of her also doesn’t take anyone’s crap and will let you know if you’ve crossed a line or if you’re flat out awful. But she’s still pleads with Peter on her attempted murder’s behalf. Wendy also reminds Peter that Tiger Lilly is drowning when he gets caught up in celebrating his cleverness. She still makes sure she can say goodbye to her brothers and the lost boys before Hook kills her. Even on her worst day Disney’s Wendy is a kind person even when those around her are less so.

But my favorite portrayal of Wendy has got to be from the 90’s classic “Peter Pan and the Pirates” TV series which aired on Fox was about one season then got cancelled. While it doesn’t really focus on Wendy a whole lot since its more concerned with the relationship between Peter Pan his lost boys and Hook’s crew.

She still has a pretty important role. Wendy often serves as a voice of reason to the group which doesn’t go against her original role in the novel since she takes a cake that’s been left out all night away from the lost boys. Which does present her as the one with the most common sense but the show lets Wendy tell Peter this is a bad idea way more often than the book and blow up at him after he does the stupid thing every one told him not to do. Also Wendy gets to be more of a moral center lecturing Peter for stealing the picture of Hook’s mother in the episode “Hooks mother” and encouraging him to return it and even getting Peter to take care of Hook after he’s injured. This is in a positive change in my opinion because it actually expands on Wendy’s role as a guide to adult hood. Here Wendy Darling encourages a kind of good behavior she helps build moral character in her boys. Wendy has strong ideals and this adaptation actually has her stand by her principals for better or worse. This not only gives her more of a central role in the story but also gives her more chances to be active. Yay character agency!

Also this version of Wendy was the first to have a bit of an interesting relationship with Hook. (Who is voiced by Tim curry and does an excellent job.) While the writers got rid of the almost pedophilic undertones of Hook wanting to keep Wendy from the novel and the “My beauty” pet name. Thank god for that even in the novel i thought it was too much. There’s still a bit of a dynamic even if its way more innocent.

In the episode In Peter on Trial Wendy not only lands on the ship unharmed but reminds Hook executing Peter without a trial would not be proper form at all. She then hits Hook in the ego by declaring “Surely you don’t doubt your powers of debate against that of a mere girl” And not only gets a trial but manages to win even when the trial is rigged against them. Hook even congratulates her before proceeding to find his own loophole and kill Peter Pan anyway. The point is this suggests this Wendy has a bit of an insight into Hook maybe more so then Peter. She knows he’s obsessed with good form and has an ego that prides its self on being the smartest person in the room.

This cuts both ways while Wendy is capable of manipulating Hook, he also consistently manipulates Wendy by offering his word as a gentlemen when he intends to break it as a pirate. This dynamic highlights Wendy’s flaw of trusting dangerous people and allowing them to hurt her friends. Hook has picked up that she trusts or wants to trust him. In this version Hook actually treats Wendy as opponent vs the usual she belongs to Peter and I want to steal her like in most adaptations. Also despite Hook being terrifying Wendy has no problem being all “There’s no need to get cranky Captain” and I kind of love how comfortable she is with the guy despite him being an enemy.

This proves Wendy doesn’t have to be a sword wielding “Who are you to call me girlie” action girl to be a good character. She can be flawed but still remain a good person and giving her a spine is always appreciated.

Wendy Darling is at her core a guide into adulthood with a strong moral character and a voice of reason who is used to shine a light on how important motherhood is since the result of mothers abandoning or neglecting their children shape the Peter’s of the world. This makes her important to the overall story and themes of Peter Pan.

#wendy darling #wendy darling appreciation #peter pan disney #Peter Pan 2003 #Peter Pan and the Pirates

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tazzmanien · 5 years

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The Untamed review

You’ve probably read a review beginning like this a 100 times before. And still I have to say it: I have never taken the time to review a single drama, because I’m lazy like that. But I think it’s time to do it for this masterpiece! And sorry for the length, I got carried away.

Yes, I have read the novel and yes, I surely do not like adaptations, as they never seem to be able to capture the essence of the canon story. So my hopes were low. If you add up the fact that this is a BL story and it had to be censored, to be able to see the light of the day in China, you would probably be less inclined to watch it. But, hear me out, this drama is worth every of the 2250 minutes of your life! They have captured the overall “look” and feel of the canon story in such a stunning way, that even if they would have discarded the canon story completely, this would have ended being a beautiful drama anyways.

Acting:

Starting from the cast, each one of them was beautiful and fit the characters they played. Most of the cast was young and yet they truly did a great job. I will be honest with you, most of Asian dramas don’t do it for me in the department of acting, as they tend to over-act, but this one was actually really good even for my picky nature. They clearly took the time to understand each character deeply and to portray them in such an accurate manner, that I didn’t know was possible. In certain aspects they even added depth to some characters that we haven’t experienced in the novel, which was heartwarming (such as Wen Qing, Jiang Yanli, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian for example). Even the synchronization didn’t take away any quality, in fact it might have even given the whole drama more sense of uniformity. Oh, and they kept so many of the original dialogs and monologs, that I actually had the novel open to compare all the time!

Set, music etc.:

The landscapes, sets, lighting, compositions, costumes, makeup, sound and choreography were all so gorgeous and well thought through, that those alone are reasons the watch it. Whoever was responsible for the camera work I love you! The way they visualized the mystical aspects of the story were entertaining and appealing (I loved the black fog and the sound that the Stygian Tiger Seal made). The martial art styles fit each character well and yet appeared as though celestial beings were dancing (I’m looking at you Xiao Xingchen and Lan Wangji). And don’t let me start talking about the music. The music will haunt you in your dreams, especially Wuji (you will know what I mean when you see the ending).

Story – incl. comparison to canon:

Lets talk about the story. The novel on its own created such an amazing new fictional world with various types of characters, that it would have been difficult to create a bad adaptation, the film makers would have had to be very lazy to ruin this. So, no surprise here, that they managed to show this divine world and vibrant interactions between colorful characters. Still, I know many do not achieve this and therefore I really want to say thank you to everyone involved who made it possible.

Besides censoring the BL part, they have managed to keep almost every single other aspect of the story. Sometimes they went into such detail, that they caught me off guard and I only managed to close my mouth after several minutes. One could see and feel the love, friendship, family, hardship, envy, revenge, madness, intrigue, strength, political issues, betrayal, hurt, rage, stupidity… And in all honesty it was made in such a way, that even if you want our main heroes to fall in love, you can even see this part in the story. It is up to you, how you interpret their interactions. I know sometimes it sounds like a cheap excuse to says such things, but really it did not feel cheap here at all!

Of course there were other changes to the story (compared to other adaptations very few in my opinion), which were very understandable in fact. Listen, not everything written and seen in our imagination does work well in a live action. It can look weird or unnecessary prolong a story and bore the viewers. So, for example, the fact that they have not chased corpse body parts, but followed a sword spirit had little to no negative effect on the story really. Changing the last fight, actually made it more enjoyable, as the novel repeated some parts too often and was kind of dragging. Changing the temporal sequences was indeed necessary to keep new viewer interested and avoid confusion. Also adding some scenes that were not in the novel, only gave more depth to some characters and made everything more understandable and heart wrenching in the end. And last but not least, yes they cut the steamy parts, but hey we got the chickens! (Yeah my priorities are sometimes weird like that.)

Conclusion:

Looking from a general viewers perspective this was an amazing and entertaining drama.

Looking from a canon fan viewers perspective this was the best adaptation we could have hoped for (within the boundaries there are due to censorship and filmmaking abilities).

Rewatch Value:

I’m gonna start it today, so a big YES!

BTW if you watch the drama with subs, then you should definitely watch the ending on Tencent, as in the WeTV app they have changed a tiny aspect, which can make less of an impact on you (in my opinion).

EDIT: They changed the WeTV app ending back to the original. So it’s the same as Tencent now. Please ignore the last paragraph and enjoy the ride.

#the untamed spoilers #the untamed #mo dao zu shi

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murasaki-murasame · 5 years

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Thoughts on Fruits Basket 2019 Episode 21: “I Never Back Down From A Wave Fight”

The absolute madmen have done it, they’ve finally made an episode that I think is inferior to the 2001 anime counterpart of it.

Seriously though, this was still a perfectly good episode and I enjoyed it more than most people probably did, but this is the one and only time where I think the 2001 anime’s unique style elevated it over this adaptation. But really, the fact that there’s only one part that the 2001 anime did better than this one isn’t exactly an insult toward this adaptation, lol.

Anyway, thoughts under the cut. [Plus some manga spoilers for at least next week’s episode]

Continuing the trend of the second half of season 1 thus far bouncing around the manga timeline a whole bunch, this episode takes us back to chapter 29, which is the only chapter adapted in this episode. Which I think makes this the first episode since, like, episode 5 where they used a single chapter as the basis of an entire episode. But this is much more of a conventionally ‘filler’ type of scenario, rather than it being heavily fleshed out in a meaningful way.

I honestly thought they’d do some heavy editing in order to splice Hana’s backstory into this whole part and make it into a two-parter that way, like Uo’s arc, but it looks like they’re really just adapting the two Hana chapters separately, but back to back. Which is fine, but it does mean that this episode might strike a lot of people as unnecessary beyond exploring Hana’s character a bit.

I’m very curious to see how people react to the next episode, especially since this episode’s content doesn’t really hint at the fact that we’re about to dive into an entire backstory episode focused on her. It comes across more like a stand-alone episode that we’ll immediately move on from, but nope, it’s set-up for actual backstory.

Though in the manga it was a lot more filler-y and self-contained, since Hana’s backstory chapter isn’t until several entire volumes later in chapter 51. I think putting them back to back in the anime makes the pacing feel way better, since in the manga her backstory chapter is just thrown in there with zero context or purpose, and doesn’t come up again. So it should feel more natural to have it happen right after this episode.

That’s basically the main reason why there’s been so many adjustments to the pacing and the order of events recently. A lot of stuff is being moved around so that it flows together nicely, and in particular it means that they can frontload the backstory and character intro episodes so that the more plot-heavy stuff can happen back to back.

I can’t help but worry that the move to have so many introduction/backstory episodes in a row might make new fans bored, but in the long run I think it’s much better than if they, sad, had Hana’s backstory randomly interrupt the story early in season 2.

I’ve at least seen a lot of people across the board wishing that we could see more of Kyo, and at least when anime-only fans say that all I can think is ‘honey, you got a big storm coming’, lol. I feel like some people might be eating their words a bit once the Kyo content starts back up.

There’s no real point talking about it much until next week, but I think Hana’s backstory is going to really catch people by surprise, for a lot of reasons, so I’m excited to see how it goes down. Even after stuff like Uo’s backstory arc, people might be taken back by the subject matter it covers.

It’ll also be another episode covering material that wasn’t in the 2001 anime at all, so for that reason alone I’d be excited for it.

Anyway, aside from all that, there’s kinda . . . not a whole lot to say about the content of this episode. It’s literally just covering a single, comedy-focused chapter from the manga, and it didn’t really add or change much. Aside from Motoko’s nightmares at the start and end of the episode, which were fun. Everything else was basically 1:1.

I honestly do think the 2001 anime’s take on this chapter was a lot more interesting, with how much it embraced it’s weirdness and comedy. The fact that a lot of it reminded me of Utena’s cinematography made me kinda biased in it’s favour, though. Most of the 2001 anime’s creative vision was kinda awful in my eyes, but that episode was genuinely really neat and had some cool ideas in it. This version was pretty much the exact opposite, in that it felt pretty much exactly like any other episode of the 2019 anime. Though in the long run I appreciate the 2019 anime’s consistency when it comes to it’s atmosphere and tone, even if it sometimes means that you get episodes like this which don’t lean as heavily into the comedy as they probably should have.

I do think the soundtrack in this episode was notably good, even if the direction was a bit lackluster.

In a lot of ways I think the next episode will play much more to the strengths of the 2019 series, since it’s much more thoroughly dramatic.

I doubt any of this would be an unpopular opinion in the fandom or anything, but unlike most people, I actually really like Motoko and the fan club girls. They’re not exactly deep or interesting as characters, and if they were real-life people I’d hate them, for obvious reasons, but I just think they’re really fun. And honestly I can’t help but feel a little bad for Motoko, even if I also kinda hate her, lmao. She’s just a bit of a miserable person all around and her whole role in the manga ends on a kinda bittersweet note.

Though on the other hand I’m also just being a bit of a contrarian and everyone hates her so I can’t help but pity her a bit, lol.

I do also like how this episode actually sets them up as a foil of sorts to Hana, which gets into how the whole message of this episode is really nice, even if it’s not super complex. The idea that loving someone doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want fits in nicely with what the series as a whole says about relationships in general. And I think the ending scene with Hana thinking about her own jealousy issues and how much Tohru means to her is a great way to set up the next episode, which is gonna really dig into all of that. An also why everyone is so scared of her. Which will probably make this episode kinda sad in hindsight to new fans.

Anyway, I’m really excited for the next episode, and I think right after that we’ll be getting into the Kyo stuff once and for all, which I’m still not at all prepared for.

#murasaki rambles #fruits basket #in this house we love Motoko u_u

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lalijinx · 4 years

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Stranger Things Fic

Genderswap Steve Harrington --> Stephanie “Stevie” Harrington

This is an unedited rough draft, but a certain someone said I should post it anyways. ;)

Dust Off Your Highest Hopes

Stevie Harrington’s parents always wanted a boy

In fact they thought she WAS going to be a boy

Her room is painted blue and while she doesn’t have anything against the color, at home it’s a reminder that her parents will always be disappointed

But she tries any way - she can’t not

She plays softball and track and swim team

She’s lean and wiry from all the sports and dresses like a tomboy - still fashionable, but she doesn’t wear skirts or dresses unless forced

Despite always wanting a boy, the Harrington’s still have. A lot of ideas of what’s Proper for a girl

Stevie doesn’t fit those either

She flirts, and makes out with a lot of guys to keep her Queen Stevie reputation

Stevie meets Nancy Wheeler and She’s fascinated

Nancy is prim and proper and dainty and delicate

She’s everything Stevie could never be

She’s the prettiest girl Stevie has ever seen

She doesn’t know how to handle these sudden butterflies

Barely understands what it means, and whatever inkling she has is shoved deep down

And yet

Her eyes follow Nancy

Stevie eventually can’t stay away, and approaches her after class

She has a stumbled excuse about asking for help in English class

Nancy looks a little surprised at first, but she tucks a strand of long hair behind her eye while clutching her books, and her big blue eyes look up at Stevie and smiles and Stevie beams

They meet in the library at lunch and Nancy really does help Stevie because she wasn’t lying about her essay but they talk too

Stevie finds herself giggling a lot more than usual but she chalks it up to the surprisingly sharp wit from Nancy

She looks picture perfect but there’s strength behind her eyes and Stevie wants to follow her anywhere

They meet up a few more times before Carol and Tommy start to get suspicious

Stevie invites Nancy to sit with them at lunch and she surprisingly accepts

It’s a little awkward at first, because Stevie suddenly realizes has been acting differently with Nancy than she does with tommy and Carol

But Nancy rallies, and Tommy and Carol tease Stevie about her suddenly caring about her grades and suddenly she’s back

She finishes the essay with Nancy’s help, and gets a better grade than she’s expecting.

She grins at the grade but her stomach is sinking

She realizes she doesn’t want Nancy to leave

She wants her to stick around, to be her friend, even though the word friend doesn’t feel quite right

She comes up with the brilliant idea to have a girls night at her house since her parents are away (again)

(It’s something she’s always secretly wanted but never knew how to ask for)

She invites Carol, and Nancy, and Nancy asks if she can bring her friend Barb, and Stevie shrugs as says “the more the merrier”

Inviting Carol was a mistake, or maybe she just never specified it was a girls only night, but Carol brings Tommy

Which.

Tommy is Stevie’s best friend but she had plans for tonight to include all the stupid things girls do at sleepovers on tv

(She hadn’t specifically planned for it to be a sleepover but she kinda hoped it turned into one)

Whatever. No one said Stevie couldn’t adapt and roll with the punches

So she breaks out the beer and sets them up on the pool deck with the radio playing in the background

Nancy and Barb show up shortly afterwards

Barb looks a little uncomfortable to be hear but Nancy smiles and Stevie pushes through the awkwardness

She also apologizes for Tommy on their way out to the pool

Nancy laughs and tucks away a strand of hair and says it’s fine

They all end up sitting by the pool chatting for a little bit before Tommy starts getting restless.

He shotguns a beer, and Carol does the same and then they both look expectantly at Stevie

She follows through without looking at Nancy, unsure what she’ll think

Except as she’s finishing the beer, Tommy is challenging Nancy and before Stevie can say anything about how she doesn’t have to Nancy is grabbing the pocket knife and gulping down the beer

Stevie stares slack jawed and feels a flush crawling up her face

She hopes its covered by the dim lights and alcohol but she can’t take that chance so she shoves Tommy into the pool and falls in after

The water is cool on her heated face and she stays under a moment longer before pushing back to the surface

Nancy is laughing when she emerges and Stevie beams, even as Tommy splashes her as he moves to the side

Carol is also laughing as she reaches down to help Tommy up but Stevie can see the split second Tommy changes his mind and yanks back, pulling Carol in too

Carol shrieks and flails into the pool and the two of them are splashing and wrestling in the water

Stevie knows they have a couple minutes before they tune back in, so she pulls herself out and playfully shakes her dripping hair at Nancy

Stevie notices that Barb is still sitting stiffly in the lounge chair, and offers her a beer and the knife

(She doesn’t know Barb that well, but she’s Nancy’s friend and Stevie has a burning need for Nancy to like her)

Barb takes them hesitantly, looking between Nancy and Stevie as Nancy says she doesn’t have to

Stevie nods too, bc she’s not going to force her to drink but she drapes herself over Nancy dripping water and Nancy laughs and squirms and twists away but she’s already wet

A look of determination slips over Barbs face, and she attempts to shotgun the beer too except the knife slips and Barb lets out a hiss of pain

Stevie lets out an oh shit and Nancy rushes over to her friend

There’s blood dripping on the concrete but it doesn’t look stitches bad

Stevie runs to get the first aid kit and meets them at the door she shows them to the down stairs bathroom

She starts to goes back out to tell Carol and Tommy but they’ve made their dripping way inside already, making out and stumbling towards the stairs

They break apart just long enough to tell Stevie they’re going to be borrowing a guest room for the night, don’t wait up and then they’re gone up the stairs

Stevie chews on her nails, a habit that her parent s hate, but she can’t help the sinking feeling that the night is ruined

But then Nancy comes out of the bathroom and smiles shyly at Stevie and maybe not all is lost

Stevie abruptly realizes she’s still dripping water all over, and Nancy is damp and has blood on her shirt

She offers that Nancy can borrow some clothes since she needs to change anyway and her heart is beating a million miles a minute when Nancy nods and tells Barb to wait down here, she’ll be right back

They head up to her room and for the first time she loves the color blue as Nancy’s eyes sparkle the exact same shade

Stevie roots around in her drawers, trying to find something that Nancy will like

And then she turns around to ask a question and Nancy is right there, smiling and the question does on her lips because suddenly the butterflies are back and she knows what they are this time and before she can think through her actions she leans forward and kisses Nancy on the lips

(Stevie is not usually one to think first and act second but for one second before the panic kicks in she wishes sh was a different person)

She jerks back and her eyes go wide and she starts to stutter out an apology

Nancy is blushing but she’s not leaving and Stevie trails off as she smiles

“I’m just gonna go tell Barb she can head home, if ...that’s alright?”

Stevie nods and smiles, and she’s almost certainly blushing hard but for once she doesn’t mind

Nancy leaves the room and Stevie stands there stupidly grinning for a moment before she remembers she’s still soaked and scrambles to pull on pajamas (which end up being a soft tee and shorts because she doesn’t own much else in the way of pjs)

Stevie flops back on the bed and covers her face with her hands trying to wipe the stupid grin off her face

She might actually get to kiss Nancy Wheeler again, for real, and she understands that she was always hoping for this

She hears the distant sound of the front door closing and she can’t help how she bounces in anticipation and panics for a minute about how to act natural before shaking her head

Nancy hasn’t judged her yet.

She waits eagerly for Nancy to come back through the door.

And waits.

The smile starts to slip off her face. The butterflies have turned into stone and her stomach is sinking with them.

Stevie gets up from the bed and heads down the stairs, hoping that maybe Nancy just stoped for a drink or a snack or something

The kitchen is empty and quiet.

Stevie heads back to the sliding doors and walks out to the pool hoping hoping hoping Nancy decided she wanted to swim after all and she didn’t just disappear, leaving her waiting behind

But the pool is quiet.

There’s nothing there except for the empty cans and the blood drops from Barb’s hand.

Stevie claps a hand over her mouth when a sob escapes involuntarily

Her chest feels tight, and she angrily kicks away one of the empty cans

It skitters across the concert and splashes into the pool and Stevie sinks down onto a lounge chair, hand muffling her sobs and she can’t keep them in, tears trailing down her face

She had really really gotten her hope up, higher than she even realized, and the come down now that Nancy essentially stood her up is hard

But she’s Stevie Freaking Harrington. It’s just as well, she thinks angrily. It’s not like she could actually date Nancy in the open. Her parents certainly wouldn’t approve, and Hawkins isn’t known for being open minded.

She angrily swipes the tears away and storms back into the house, grabbing one of her fathers whiskey bottles on her way back to her room.

She’s had enough of tonight and drowns her feelings in alcohol and if she cries into her pillow no one will know.

(Jonathon is out in the woods looking for his brother. He knows there’s something going on and he knows sometimes the camera sees more than the eye.

So he’s wandering the woods when he hears shrieking and just as he gets close he hears it turn into laughter

He heartbeat settles slightly but he still raises his camera to his eye

He doesn’t know yet what happened to Will so right now he’s documenting everything. Even if he’s pretty sure Stevie Harrington had nothing to do with it

He is a little surprised to see Nancy Wheeler and Barbra Holland hanging out with Stevie and her crowd

Not that he keeps up with the school gossip but he’s pretty sure Nancy and Barb don’t run in the same circles as Stevie Harrington

He snaps pictures almost automatically as he watches Carol and Tommy wrestle in the pool and Barb cut her finger on a beer can. Stevie, Nancy, and Barb go inside, and Carol and Tommy follow shortly, obliviously making out.

Jonathon sighs, frustrated with everything as he checks the settings on his camera again

He not sure what he’s hoping for out here but he can’t not do anything

When he looks back up, Barb is sitting by the pool, alone, one hand pressed to the other

He raises the camera and takes another photo to test the settings

Movement catches his eye on the upper level and he moves his lens to follow it

He sees Stevie and Nancy smiling at each other in the window and snaps a picture out of habit

In the next second he sees Stevie lean forward and kiss Nancy and Jonathon goes red and fumbles his camera in his embarrassment and shock.

He picks it up and retrains it back toward the house just in time to see Barb giving Nancy a quick hug and heading back into the house.

Nancy stays by the pool and smiles at nothing and Jonathon sees a blush rising on her cheeks

Jonathon is suddenly struck by how beautiful she is, with the pool lights dancing along her flushed face, and snaps another picture before he suddenly remembers all over again that Will is missing and he doesn’t have time for this

When he looks up again Nancy is gone.)

(He hasn’t left yet, the realization that taking photos in the woods was a stupid idea to find his brother rooting him to the spot.

He flinches and sinks lower into the shadows when he hears the skittering of a can and looks up to see Stevie Harrington sitting on the pool chair in shorts and a T-shirt and starts when he realizes she’s crying

He’s never seen Stevie Harrington cry before, and his jaw goes a little slack as he watches her sobbing into her hand.

He’s just about to awkwardly convince himself that he should go see if she’s okay (he may not particularly like her, but she’s sobbing ) when she stands sharply up, swiping her face angrily and storming back into the house.

Jonathon lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding and moves carefully away from the house. He still wants to develop the photos he took, even if they’re almost guaranteed to be useless. He’s can’t stop thinking that if there is something, he has to try. )

Stevie wakes up hung over, but it’s a Wednesday and she’s an old hat at disguising it

She covers up the bags under her eyes, brushes her teeth, fixes her hair and grabs her sunglasses on her way out the door

She still feels like her stomach is filled with stones, but no one else has any reason to suspect that so she pastes a smile on her face and plays up the party girl image

Stevie isn’t sure what she’s going to say when she sees Nancy but she lucks out and doesn’t see her in the halls at all

She does see Barb, alone, and something niggles at her but she pushes it aside, even if Barb gives her an impressive side eye

Turns out she should have paid more attention because Barb pulls her aside into an empty classroom on her way to lunch

Stevie pulls her hand away and scowls at her - Barb is one of the only people who might have an idea why Stevie is in a foul mood, and she drops the personable party girl act

Barb is scowling back, and starts talking before Stevie can come back with something cutting

“I don’t know exactly what happened last night, but you need to apologize to Nancy-“

“What did I do!?” Except she knows what she did and guilt is curling around her chest to tangle with the hurt

“I don’t know, but she sent me home, and now she’s not in school and she won’t even answer my calls, so obviously you must have done something after I left!”

Confusion stops her panic cold.

“What are you talking about”

“You know exactly what I’m-“

Stevie interrupts her, “No, I know, I mean... I thought she left with you.“

Barb stares at her.

“What?”

“I don’t know what you’re trying to pull here...” but even as Barb says it, she trails off, unsure, something on Stevie’s face giving away her sincere confusion.

“I — she left. I thought with you. You’re saying she didn’t go home with you last night?”

“No.”

Stevie stares at her. Barb stares back.

“She didn’t stay with me — I mean at my place. I just assumed she left when you did. She didn’t exactly tell me when she did.” Stevie mutters the last part, looking away as her face flushes, but it’s just her and Barb in an empty classroom so of course she sees it.

“Nancy doesn’t have a car. “

Stevie looks back at the non-sequitur, temporarily relieved that Barb is choosing to ignore anything Stevie gave away.

Stevie quirks an eyebrow. “So?”

Barb sighs. “So, I drove her to your house last night. And she told me she was going to stay the night. So I left. Alone. “

“She, uh—“ Stevie takes a breath and holds it for a second, letting it out in one big rush. “She just said she was going to tell you to head home. And then... then she never came back up.” Stevie looks down at her feet. “I assumed she changed her mind or something and just left with you.”

Barb looks a little worried now.

“That’s not like Nancy.”

“Maybe she walked? Or got another ride? I don’t know.” Stevie is rapidly approaching her limit for this conversation. She was already feeling raw from last night, and rehashing it all with Barb makes her feel uncomfortably vulnerable.

“Look.” Stevie points her finger at Barb. “I don’t know what Nancy did. All I know is she didn’t hang around my place last night, so maybe she bailed on both of us.” Stevie shakes her head. “And I don’t care. Nancy’s a big girl, she can do whatever she wants.” The lie tastes sour on her tongue, but she spins around and stalks to the door, and stops, hesitating with her hand on the handle.

“When you do see her...” Stevie doesn’t turn around, doesn’t want to see whatever is on Barb’s face right now, “Tell her I’m sorry.”

With that, she yanks open the door and exits, flipping her sunglasses back over her eyes. They can hide more than bags and light sensitivity, and no one has to see Stevie Harrington pull herself back together.

TBC...

#fanfiction #fanfic #stranger things #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #barb holland #jonathon byers #genderswap #life of lali #I hope the read more works #if it doesn't I'm so sorry #frejennix #rough draft #some day I'll post it on ao3 #long post #dust off your highest hopes

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fmdlyna · 4 years

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setting: June 22, at the picnic site summary: Self-reflection is not something she can just hit 'play' on. Feelings don't come on demand. (event self-para) word count: ~850 notes: She’s pretty wishy-washy about the whole thing. In other words, this is what you’d hand in when you forgot you had homework until 3am the day it’s due.

When Lyna receives the journal and the instructions that come along with it, she's hesitant. It's not that the nature of the activity is foreign to her; she's kept journals before, has started many only to forget about them at some point because she runs out of things to say, but it feels stilted. Forced. Self-reflection is not something she can just hit 'play' on. Feelings don't come on demand.

Nervous energy guides her hand as she slowly brings pen to paper to add the date to the top-right corner of the page; a habit, something familiar. It takes her back to her school days, all of this, and she wonders if this is an exam, the essay they have to write so the teachers know whether they learned anything through this excursion. Is anyone going to take this notebook from her to read today's entry? It seems to her like that would be out of line, like listening in on a conversation they aren't part of, but if they don't, how will they know whether any of them even did as they asked? What if she writes something else instead, a fable about a fox whose agility the bear's strength can't compete with? A poem about water that flows around whichever obstacles you place in its path, always finding a way to move forward, undeterred in its calmness or its ferocity, unapologetic?

But she doesn't. It's not a day for rebellion, she decides and stretches out her legs to settle into a more comfortable position with the notebook in her lap, where her body protects it from view. (There's no one around who could see, anyway.) Her sandals with their loosened straps slip off her feet and she kicks them aside, buries her toes in the grass so the blades tickle her skin. This is how the first paragraph she writes comes to be: “Note to self: Check for ticks later. The knowledge that they could be there, waiting for their chance to pounce, still doesn't scare you, as per usual. It shouldn't. Never let the fear of a consequence stop you from doing something you love, something that makes you happy.”

With the midday sun up in the sky on a day where spring bleeds into summer, the shadow she throws on the rich greens of nature is large and dark, its silhouette vaguely resembling a woman but not her. The angle makes her legs look too long, her body too thin and her hair doesn’t appear to end anywhere, reaches the ground like it grew from it, like she did. In a way, it's a fitting metaphor, this crooked image she casts that's her but not, and she writes that down, too.

“I hope I never forget that I'm not what other people see when they look at me, or even what I see when I look in the mirror. I'm not defined by the right angles and flattering light, and neither am I the picture people paint with their words, compliments or insults or innocent observations. I think I knew that already, have known for a while. But self-reflection isn't self-discovery. There's nothing wrong with reminders. I'm not an adventure, or a mystery, or a question.”

Lyna squints against the sun when she lifts her head to look up at the cloudless blue sky that seems especially endless today, infinite as it is, the same sky she's seen her whole life and never grew tired of. It's clearer here, where fine dust doesn't obscure the view and the stars shine so brightly at night that she was almost tempted to count them, but it's the same sky nonetheless. It was a good reminder that the stars are always there, even when she can't see them, the image a memory now safely stored away.

“I can't say with confidence that I learned anything new about myself on this trip, but somehow, that doesn't feel like a bad thing. I'd like to think that it's because I already know myself. Better than anyone, I'd argue. The task is to contemplate my current state, but there's not much to say about a girl with the resilience of a rubber band. Sometimes I bend and sometimes I'm stretched so far, I think I'm going to snap, but I never do, and eventually, I always bounce back into what I was before. There's no shame in adaptability, no weakness in a lack of rigidity. I don't know if it's a good thing that I don't seem to change much through whatever experiences I make, but I don't know that it's a bad thing either. I forgive because I want to, try again because that's how I grow. It hurts sometimes, and sometimes it doesn't, and sometimes neither of those things is right or wrong.

So I guess the conclusion is that my current state is the same as always. Like the stars that shine even when you can't see them, I think happiness is always with me somewhere. With all of us, really, because the stars are out there, just waiting for us to look up. And one day, we will.”

#fmdwellnessretreat #◐ don't wanna wait any longer for the feeling of getting stronger | character development #This is my 100th post so here we have something very representative of Lyna #being vague about her feelings even when she's just talking to herself

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