#and was never explored or acknowledged bcs he grew up never knowing it was there or having the outlets to explore it

[spiritofjustice]

consider

to be clear, i'm not saying it's impossible for someone to make a full recovery from an injury like that but i'm like. well if you're gonna do that. make it count dude

#psy's no punctuation posts #aa tag #Amara is a very interesting character to me and i wanna explore her cause she's just so damn STRANGE #and she has a lot of unique potential #also re: the spiritual power with Nahyuta: i actually do think he has some spiritual powers and it's just reticent/hasn't come out yet #he isn't a man anyways but whenever i say Nahyuta is a man i mean functionally in the canon story #but personally i think he has a small pool of power. it isn't to the insane level Amara has and it isn't to Rayfa's level but it's there #and was never explored or acknowledged bcs he grew up never knowing it was there or having the outlets to explore it #but like. clearly he has powers right. like canonically. #not /spiritual/ powers but i think yes he could have spiritual powers #it'd be awkward for him to acknowledge now because only women are supposed to have the powers and he transitioned a while ago lol #he's not a woman. but he sure does have the power #also the fact only women can do it is interesting. why. what about women causes it. could trans women also have the power. #can people assigned female at birth who transition (like nahyuta) have it. many such things to consider #it has weird gender implications once you get trans characters involved and idk the answer sincerely KRKFJN

[art-gelato]

posting a snippet of the perc’ahlia tam lin au i’m working on bc i’m excited abt it but idk how long it’s gonna take me to write the whole thing, esp since i’m working concurrently on like 4 fics for these crazy kids. anyway enjoy

...

Percy settled as comfortably as possible on a nearby log and busied himself with sketching. He enjoyed the close observation that revealed all the little details—how the leaves’ edges grew jagged, how thin veins webbed the lighter green undersides. He could not attest to exactly how much time he passed this way, only that the sun was descending from its zenith when he was at last satisfied with his drawing. Mild hunger panged his stomach, and he decided he would eat his sandwich and then head back.

Before closing his sketchbook, he reached for one of the leaves. He could press and preserve it, perhaps start a record of the variety of plants he finds in the area. It would be something to do until his workshop was finished, at least.

“I’d recommend against that, darling.”

Percy snatched his hand back and whipped towards the voice, every nerve in his body alight. He felt himself reflexively reaching for the rapier at his hip, though he was at a poor angle to draw it.

A woman leaned against a tree a few meters away, watching him impassively. Her long dark hair was pulled into a braid and woven with vines, and a pair of fresh green leaves were tucked into the locks behind her right ear. She was dressed somewhat plainly in earth-toned clothes that fit loosely around her for ease of movement.

But Percy’s attention snagged on the bow she held casually in one hand. He couldn’t help thinking about how fast she might be able to draw from the quiver on her back, how good her aim might be.

Diplomacy, as ever, was his first recourse. Still, he kept his thumb on the guard of his rapier, out of her line of sight.

“Indeed?” he asked.

She smiled, though her expression was void of mirth. “Indeed,” she replied. “Unless you’d like a nasty rash, of course.”

His gaze had wandered to her face, but movement snapped it back to the bow. She’d made no motion to raise it, though—the bow itself seemed to have an eerie life, the vines he’d taken for intricate etchings twisting and resettling. Ah, he realized. And now that he was looking for more oddities, he could see fine lines of faint green meandering along her exposed skin, as if she had vines in lieu of veins.

He forced himself to meet her dark eyes. “And it would have nothing to do with stealing from a faerie’s wood?”

Her smile sharpened. “That might have its own consequences, yes.”

Oddly, this eased his nerves. There were rules here—strange, dangerous rules, but rules nonetheless. Full of quicksand as it may be, it was a field he was familiar with. “I hope I’m not trespassing, at the least.”

“Not by my ken,” she said. “Though I hear there’s a new lord at the manor.”

Percy wet his lips. “I have his permission,” he said. “I should like yours, as well.”

Her eyes raked up and down him, considering. There was an edge to her, a hunger, like a void that could never be filled, and it made Percy feel distinctly hunted. It set his heart racing in a way he didn’t entirely mind.

At last, she said, “Well, you do seem to know your manners. Continue to mind them, and I’ll allow it.”

“Is there anything else I ought to mind?” Percy asked.

She tapped her chin in thought, though he had a feeling she already knew. “Stay out of the darkest woods,” she said. “Where even noonday sun struggles to reach through the leaves.”

Ominous. He liked it. “Very reasonable,” he replied. “This is a lovely forest, and I am grateful to have your leave of exploring it.”

She acknowledged this with a hum. “If you’re to be here regularly, we may as well have some proper introduction. What might I call you?”

It wasn’t outright asking for his name, but Percy still knew better than to give it. She was testing him, seeing if he’d let down his guard now that they’d struck an accord. In a fit of daring he was previously unaware he possessed, he answered, “I believe ‘darling’ will do.”

Delight sparked in her expression, cracking through the cool mask she’d worn so far, and she threw her head back and laughed. She kept laughing as she disappeared back into the trees, her light chuckle echoing like the call of a magpie long after she was gone.

#perc'ahlia #vex'ahlia #percy de rolo #percival de rolo #the legend of vox machina #critical role campaign 1 #writing counts as art

[mayxthexforce]

stop reblogging these bc i'm legally obligated to fucking yap

obi-wan and maul we have an insane amount of verses for these two. 'redemption' and kss are my favourites (tho i have a soft spot for the two grumpy old men on tatooine together). they're fun and weird and they shouldn't work but they really do. maul has haunted obi-wan since that faithful day on tatooine. not bc of what he did to qui-gon, but bc of what obi-wan did to maul. it's something that obi-wan never forgives himself for. it's something maul never forgives him for even tho, technically, it did free him. and then obi-wan has kept maul going through the worst moments of his life. a burning passion whether it's good or bad (it's bad), a reason to continue on, a purpose - aka the only thing he's ever wanted. they both go against everything they know when they love each other but they do and it works and it's so fun to write and explore. you and your obi-wan have really helped me develop maul so much in the past,,,, idk 10 months?? 11??

drakka and maul i like their origins. i love them chasing each other around coruscant and drakka pushing maul outside of his comfort zone. it's almost like a little romeo and juliet thing. maul Knows she's a jedi, but she doesn't really know he's a sith. they should be enemies, but they're not. they're just playing catch.

quinlan and maul our first ship!! i like these two a lot. there's something so soft about them meeting on tatooine before everything happens. quinlan characteristically ignoring what he Should be doing as a jedi and maul being swayed into ignoring what he Should be doing. quinlan giving maul the gentleness he's craved, but refused to acknowledge. treating him like something that isn't just a tool to control and use.

kilindi and maul quite literally the first person to ever show maul a shred of decency. i like them a lot as just besties who had some romantic tension as they grew up together. i like the tragedy of what Could have been, but what never happens. maul has to repress the whole thing to even be able to move on from it.

Who do you ship with my muse?

Bonus: Include why you like the ship!

MAUL'S ORIGINAL HAREM 😂 love to see them all in the same ask, it's like they're in a car trip (someone —probably Obi-Wan— would get thrown out of the car if that was the case). They're all so dear to me and I love how each ship unfolds in a completely different way despite the fact they all involve Maul. They all love Maul so much in such different ways. From the decade old obsession to the what could have been.

#||mail: obi wan kenobi|| #||mail: drakka judarrl|| #||mail: quinlan vos|| #||mail: kilindi matako|| #mutatiio #||answered ask||

[deathbydistress]

Steve isn't a father figure to those kids he's more of a big brother to them. The way the fandom took the whole Steve is a single mom joke so far is insane bc he isn't a parent to the kids, they have their own. Idk why the teens (esp Steve) get parentified in this fandom as if this is like something good and cute. Plus literally he doesn't even act like a dad towards them. He's the annoyed older sibling who just drives them around and gives awful advice. Yeah he says they gave them the experience because he's literally an only child, he never had to take care of someone younger than him. But this gave him the option to see that this is a future he wants to have. It doesn't mean he wants to start now like you said he can go wild for some time but eventually that's his end goal and idk why the fandom hates it sm when they started the whole mom Steve joke.

It's not wrong for him to want his own kids. You can find family in your friends, but that doesn't mean he isn't allowed to want something for himself. He grew up as an only child, his parents don't seem to love each other that much, idk what his relationship with them is like but it makes sense for him to want to settle eventually because the kids made him realize that he can do better. He longs for someone who he can start a family with, and there is nothing wrong with that. It's also not like he wants a family bc it's expected of him, he wants a family because he genuinely loves the idea. He won't be the classic dad who isn't really involved with a stay at home partner. He wants to be present and be there in ways his parents weren't. Like idk what show you watched where you came to the conclusion that Steve only wants kids bc of tradition or conformity.

Hi, it's just a head canon idea that I had. And yeah while I can agree that he would want kids of his own and he's want to start a family, the idea that he is expected to have kids and start a family can also coexist.

he can know that it's expected of him, and not want kids BECAUSE of that, but also want kids for himself and his own reasons. I think that's what I left out.

As for him being Mom Steve? I agree, I personally feel like, a majority of the time he's kept around because he's useful. He can baby sit the kids while the adults do the "hard lifting" and I know he hates that. But I don't see it as he hates it because he's an annoyed older brother, he hates it because the other adults, such as Nancy, Jonathan, etc, they also treat him as if his only use is to be a baby sitter.

And I'm not saying that Steve necessarily views himself as their dad, he probably wouldn't ever feel comfortable if one of the kids called him dad, but he can acknowledge that he is the parent friend and he takes care of them in a way that they're all lacking.

Whether you like this idea or not, as it stands, each one of the kids in the party are missing one thing in their life: a father figure. And no Steve is not anywhere close to their dad, but he realizes because of the party, his dream to settle down as soon as possible, get married, start a family, it can wait for a little bit. He's allowed to just live and explore.

#steve my beloved #steve harrington #steve harrington headcanons #Mom Steve #parent friend #stranger things

[iamanartichoke]

I wasn't sure if I was going to post this, but I may as well.

I keep starting to reply to things and then stopping bc the words just aren't there, and I suppose I figured out the core of what bothers me so much (and is making me have such a rollercoaster of a fan experience) about the show.

(cut for length)

It's not well-written. My opinion is my opinion, so I'm saying this subjectively, take it or leave it, but ... I feel that it's not well-written. The overall story is fine, and the plot is fine, but I don't know if it's because of the limited number of episodes not being enough to house the story, or because of the relative inexperience of the writer/showrunner+director, or both, or something else, but -

In an earlier reaction post to episode 4, I mentioned really wanting to sink my teeth into all of the subtext I picked up on. That was what made me initially enjoy the episode so much - there were a lot of little moments that I initially felt revealed so much about the characters and about Loki, and I wanted to analyze them. But at some point, as I gathered more information, my perspective changed and now I no longer want to analyze the subtext bc ... subtext = good. Subtext w/out payoff = not as good.

I'll go into more detail in a moment, but I think the tl;dr of it is that I feel like the narrative requires the audience to work way too hard to put together all of the moving pieces here and, like, I kinda just don't want to do that work? Not so much of it, and not in vain. A lot of the enjoyment of Loki's characterization is coming from fans who are rationalizing why he's behaving as he is, but the narrative never actually confirms those rationalizations. It's asking us to figure it out and maybe our conclusions will be correct but maybe they won't, though. At some point, subtext isn't enough without explicit follow-through.

I thought my issue was with the lack of character development - that is, not having enough narrative space to really earn the big things that are happening now, like Loki/Sylvie or Mobius turning against the TVA. And that's still true, to an extent; I still feel like the pacing is all very off and it seems like most of these things kinda came out of nowhere (but are not unbelievable - just undeveloped).

But, yknow, it is what it is, it's a limited series, and I can excuse some things. Ultimately, my issue isn't a problem with what the narrative isn't doing, it's a problem with what the narrative already failed to do and probably cannot recover from at this point.

The narrative has left out significant details that should at least help us do some of the work here. If a person turned on Loki and started episode 1 and had no background knowledge of the character besides that he tried to take over New York - how would that person interpret Loki? Would that person say, oh, well, he's been through X, Y, and Z, and plus A happened, not to mention B, C, and D, so really, it makes sense that he seems off-the-rails, or that he'd want to get ridiculously drunk at the worst time ever.

Maybe we'd like to believe they would, but how would they be getting to that conclusion? The narrative hasn't led them in that direction so, no, they would not say well we have to consider this, this, and that. It would be impossible to really understand Loki as a character from just what we've gotten in the series. The general audience would probably interpret Loki as being out of his element and so it becomes, I wonder how this character is going to get the upper hand here. And, while that's not wrong, it's just so limited.

The narrative at face value does not address Loki's identity crisis from Thor 2011. It does not address his hurt and devastation at being lied to, nor does it address how complicated his self-image is (bc it sucked to begin with and that was before he found out he was part of a race of "monsters," as he'd been taught his entire life). It does not reference Loki being so broken at the end of Thor 2011 that he deliberately let himself fall into the void of space (aka tried to kill himself). It does not reference that he was tortured by Thanos or even that he went through a seriously dark time in between Thor and Avengers, and it absolutely does not reference or address any influence or control of the mind stone.

These are all things that we, the fan audience, know because we've already invested our time into this character's story. But tons of people, the general audience, wouldn't know these things. Or if they did, bc they saw Thor and Avengers, they wouldn't be thinking about them as deeply as we would, nor contextualizing them with how Loki is behaving now, or why it would make sense that he needed to get drunk, or why it's understandable that he needs to keep going-going-going in order to not have a spare second to think or feel.

They'd probably look at Loki, again, as a character who was a villain and is now getting his comeuppance in a place where he has no power or control, and no literal powers, and even when he manages to escape and catch up to the variant, he proceeds to fuck up their plan for seemingly no real reason except that he wanted to get drunk bc he's hedonistic. Which Sylvie even berates him for! I mean. This is not exactly a complex character breakdown, nor a very flattering one, but that's what the narrative has given us.

(If the narrative has addressed Loki's mind control, his torture, his mental breakdown, his suicide attempt, and his general shitty self-esteem as a result of his upbringing, please point it out to me. If the narrative has explicitly acknowledged and referenced these things anywhere and I am missing it, please show me where. Please explain to me how the casual viewer would know any of these things that they need to know in order to actually understand what's happening in this story.)

So I mean, okay, we have a narrative that doesn't paint a full, accurate picture of Loki. Fine, sure. But because the general audience starts out on the wrong footing, they're not going to get out of the overall story what the writers probably intended them to. For example, in episode 3, a lot of us theorized that Loki had some kind of plan - that he broke the timepad on purpose, for some reason, bc otherwise it wasn't believable that he'd be such a failure. But episode 4 revealed that no, there was no bigger plan, Loki just plain old messed up. Which is fine if, again, one is only considering the surface-level portrayal here, but it's not true to Loki's actual characterization.

I mean. Loki is not perfect and Loki actually fails a lot, this is true. He fails for a lot of reasons, but incompetence has never been one of them. Usually it's that either things grew beyond his control, or there ended up being too many moving parts, or he had to change his plan at the last minute due to some roadblock or another being thrown his way, or even that he got in his own way - whatever the case may be for his plans' failures, he was always at least shown to know what he was doing.

That wasn't the case here. The "plan" to fix the Timepad failed as a direct result of Loki's actions, which were careless and made him seem incompetent, like he couldn't even handle this mission. "You had one job," etc. And there were pretty big consequences for this; they were not able to get off-world in time and would have been killed had the TVA not shown up at the last second.

And maybe none of these things matter bc the writers never intended any of this to be a reflection on Loki's character, positive or negative. The situation exists solely because the writers needed to put Loki and Sylvie together in some kind of hopeless scenario so that they could get closer, and thus the narrative could set up their romance. I get that - but, there were other ways to do it that didn't require Loki to look foolish.

Furthermore, the whole reason they needed to set up the romance is to show Loki eventually learning to love himself (like, figuratively but also literally). The audience is supposed to gather that Loki and Sylvie fell for one another, possibly due to the high emotional aspect of, yknow, being about to die (in addition to the variant-bond). The intent is clear: Loki and Sylvie almost die but get rescued at the last minute, having now created an emotional bond --> Loki and Sylvie team up and the narrative further establishes that Loki, at least, has caught feelings --> Loki might confess them but is pruned before he gets the chance --> he somehow survives, he and Sylvie are reunited and don't want to lose one another again, and the combined power of their love is enough to break the sacred timeline and spawn the multiverse, and the reason that the power of their love is so, well, powerful is because it's about self-love and self-acceptance as much as it is about having the capacity to love someone else. The end.

I get all that. The writers more or less said all that. And, I mean, it's certainly not the way I would have chosen to go about it, but it's a fair enough arc to explore. I don't really have an issue with the intent - but my question, however, is this: if the narrative has so far not addressed Loki's background issues (as outlined above), and has furthermore kinda gone out of its way to portray Loki as hedonistic and narcissistic, among other things (like kinda incompetent), and the context the audience starts with is that Loki's this villain who deserves what he gets -

- my question is 1, why should the audience care whether or not Loki gets to a point of loving and accepting himself (thus to make the theme of self-love, via the romance, hold weight) if they don't know that he hates himself to begin with and 2, why should the audience root for Loki to reach that point when so far the perception of him is that he's "kind of an asshole"? if he's a hedonistic narcissist, he probably already has a pretty inflated sense of himself, right? A misplaced inflated sense of himself, at that, because, again, the narrative has made him out to be not that capable of much of anything. (And it didn't start out that way! It seemed to start out with Loki being capable and intelligent but it's like episode 3, in trying to set up the romance, just jumbled it all up somewhere. I think this is why I'm harping on the Loki/Sylvie aspect so much - it's frustrating bc it kinda messes up the whole story and can't even accomplish what it's supposed to anyway.)

Anyway, that's beside the point. What I'm ultimately getting at is, at what point is the audience supposed to get invested in Loki's personal growth journey?

They can't, not really. Without understanding and having the context of everything Loki has been through up until now, and why he hates himself, and why it's so important that he learn to love himself, then the "payoff" becomes kinda pointless bc the significance of it is lost in translation. So suddenly we're left with this romance that comes off as either "Loki loves Sylvie bc of Reasons" (best-case scenario) or "Loki loves Sylvie bc he's vain, narcissistic, and kinda twisted" (worst-case scenario). Neither of these conclusions are what the writers intended or were going for, I'm positive, but there we are, regardless.

In order for the writers' intent in these storylines to land, they need to address the context of what makes these particular stakes high for Loki. So far, they haven't done that. They're asking the audience to pick up on all of these things, and they're showing things that subtextually make sense and are relatively in-character - but only if you realize there's subtext in the first place.

But you can't expect the audience to do all of the work for you. If you don't want the audience to think that Loki is a narcissistic asshole and instead you are trying to convey that, worst-case scenario, he thinks he's a narcissist but is an unreliable narrator, then you have to address that. If you need the audience to understand why you're going the selfcest route and why it's important to explore Loki's capacity to love himself and others, you have to address where that exploration is starting from and why it matters. Etc etc etc.

The narrative isn't doing any of that. And it isn't like it'd be that hard to do it. They don't need to reinvent the wheel here; a lot of the pieces are already there. A few lines of dialogue for context, a brief scene here or there addressing the issues, a little more care and consistency in how Loki handles things - these are all little things that could go a long fucking way in making the narrative stronger.

I'm rambling. My basic point is that my rollercoaster of emotions with this show is because

- as a part of the fan audience, not the general one, I can contextualize and analyze the subtext and come to the conclusions the show wants me to, and thus find the story and the characters more or less enjoyable,

- but I am also going to be using the subtext to come to conclusions that aren't there but probably should be (I think it would be a better story, for example, for Loki to confuse platonic love with romantic love bc it would pave the way to explore just how fucked up Loki's understanding of love - whether of other people or of himself, and the different forms it can take - actually is)

- and when they're ultimately not there, then I think, okay why am I bothering doing all this work just to ultimately feel very unfulfilled? They don't even have to write it the way I would, I'm not saying that, but they do have to do something to make the story feel rewarding.

If we don't get some confirmation of what Loki's been through, and where his headspace is, and why it matters for him to love himself, then the story remains pretty shallow and, for me, it's not fulfilling enough. It's not engaging enough. There isn't actually anything to sink my teeth into, so it becomes kind of boring. Maybe it's rewarding to other people, and that's great for them, but like - I need more than whatever this is.

So I'm just like - well, I had a lot of worries about this show, but my being bored wasn't one of them and now there's only two episodes left and am I really not going to get anything out of this, in the long run? No new canons, no new depths or layers, no new information on Loki's experiences? This is it?

I don't dislike it. I didn't start out disliking it, and I probably wont end up disliking it. I mean, there are a lot of good moments, and good things, and fan service-y things that I appreciate. As far as inspiration for fic goes, it's a goldmine, both plot-wise as well as aesthetic-wise. All of that is great. I don't dislike this show.

But I am disappointed in it, and I feel like I'll be watching the next two episodes lacking the sense of anticipation that would make it exciting. I'll still enjoy them, probably, if for nothing else just the sheer Loki content, but whatever it was I felt watching episodes 1 and 2 is gone and I'm sad about that, too. Because I really wanted to feel fulfilled by this series; I wanted it to fill up the void that Loki's death in IW created three years ago. And I just ... don't feel it. Maybe, maybe that'll change over the course of episodes 5 and 6. I don't know.

Everything that I end up enjoying long-term, I think, will come about as a result of my own interpretations and analysis and while theoretically there's nothing wrong with that, if I had known all I'd get out of this series was more headcanons or support for my current headcanons then, well - that's fine, I suppose, but I'll definitely a little bit robbed.

#loki spoilers #loki series negativity #loki tv series spoilers #loki series spoilers #long post

[isoldmysoultojonahclemence]

JONAH’S EVER AFTER ON IKEREV TW

I CAN’T I--

HIS RELEASE CAMPAIGN CAME OUT YESTERDAY BUT I ONLY SAW IT A FEW MINUTES AGO BC I WAS ON VACATION I CAN’T BELIEVE I MISSED THIS WHAT KIND OF JONAH STAN AM I

THIS MEANS THAT JONAH’S ROUTE CAMPAIGN WILL BEGIN SOMEWHERE AROUND LATE OCTOBER OR EARLY NOVEMBER IN THE ENGLISH VERSION SO MARK YOUR CALENDARS

I’m putting the rest of this under a cut for length bc I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY

[Translation:

“On the 1 in a hundred million chance that I cannot marry you into the Clemence family, then I’m prepared to abandon my family.”

Whether it’s to build a family together, or to receive happiness together. For the one you love, the path you should take to the future is...

“You’re really too much. Don’t say something like...I’m sorry.”

The eyes that are brighter than the fireworks in the sky overflow with tears, and turn into strength to overcome the mirror blocking our path.

“When it’s only the two of us, I’m just Jonah...and I want to spoil you as much as I like.”]

ASDFKJWEIH;KAFJJE;LSAKFSD

I CAN ALREADY SENSE THE ABSOLUTE ANGST IN THIS ROUTE

IN HIS ORIGINAL ROUTE HE HAS TO ABANDON THE RED ARMY AND NOW IN HIS EVER AFTER HE HAS TO ABANDON HIS FAMILY TOO????? ESPECIALLY AS WE ALL KNOW HOW MUCH THE CRIMSON LINEAGE MEANS TO HIM??????????????????

And something I also really like is how the themes from the original route extends into his sequel, like the parts about “never apologizing” and “I can only be myself when I’m with you.” It just makes it feel more like a sequel and adds a better sense of completion uwu

ALSO JONAH’S TEARS ARE GOING TO DESTROY ME Y’ALL WILL SEE ME SOBBING ON TUMBLR WHEN I GET TO THAT PART

.

Here’s the mini talk list:

Luka + Sirius: please tell me about your families!

This one is already out, so here’s the screenshots!

[Translation:

Sirius: My home is always full of flowers, it’s a place that makes your mood lift.

Luka: Yeah...as opposed to Sirius’s family, mine was very quiet.

Luka: Even though it had always been pretty quiet...but ever since “that person” left home, it became even quieter.

Luka: Maybe it was because my family weren’t interested in me, so that’s why it feels so quiet.

Sirius: Haven’t you ever had experiences of playing noisily with Jonah in your home before?

Luka: No. We’re different from Sirius’s family...but there was only one time.

Luka: When I was young, that person had brought me out secretly before.

Luka: The both of us ran around and played in the secret courtyard that person found...

Luka: Until the skies grew dark.

Sirius: ...Is that so. Where is that courtyard full of memories? Is it close to your home?

Luka: I don’t know, I can’t remember...but, it doesn’t matter if I can’t remember it.

Luka: Now I think...it’s alright if that courtyard only exists in my memory.]

*deep breath*

ALKL;KCVKNCKDSA;KWOIWQOIK;FDMX;LZDS;ALKSJFA;LKJ

AKD;XJCEWQ8RJEIU;ANFVDFJSVVF’WDOIJ

;NWEFFKKGDMZXCKCERTIIUIBRI;JDSFJSMF;JLAEKF;LEQKJBNCM

FIRST OF ALL

A SECRET COURYARD???????? THAT JONAH FOUND?????????????? AND BROUGHT LUKA THERE TO PLAY???????????????????????? BUT ONLY ONCE???????????????????????????????????

I wonder how he managed to find it? But also it was to be expected that he would bring Luka bc he always wants to share what he loves with Luka (｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡

Also just imagine the little Clemence bros running around and playing (｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡ ♡ ♡

But like...

OH MY GOD LUKA WHAT HAVE YOU GONE THROUGH ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

It’s so sadddddddd to think that the Clemence house got even quieter when Jonah left. Also I can’t figure out if Jonah “leaving” means that he left to go to boarding school or if he left to join the Red Army, but that was probably when Luka started to hate Jonah for abandoning him. I can’t imagine what it’s like to grow up in such a quiet and cold place and to have it grow even quieter and colder when the one person you thought cared about you left because now he has other things that are more important than you (/□＼*)・゜

Edgar + Kyle: can love between people of different social statuses exist?

The rest of these aren’t released at the moment I wrote this, so I’m mainly just going to be addressing my predictions!

So it’s clear that Jonah and MC are considered to be from different social ranks, even though MC is “Alice the Second” and has the power to nullify magic. She’s probably considered as a “commoner” in the Red Territory, so I can see why it would be difficult for Jonah and MC to get married.

And you know what else this reminds me of??? If we look at Seth’s route, we finally find out that the whole reason Cradle got divided into two was because a Red noble fell in love with a girl from a different social rank. And that romance tore a country apart, so.

Dean + Dalim: about family

Aight here we go. Are Dean and Dalim really family??? Do we finally get to find out??? Or at least get some sort of clue??? Bc I’m torn between the theory that they’re twins with amnesia or if Dean was some sort of clone created by the Magic Tower when they experimented on Dalim. And I have no idea when their routes are gonna be released, so I really hope we get more hints throughout each Ever After route.

Lancelot: Jonah’s tears

THIS IS THE SECOND MINI TALK THAT WILL DESTROY ME AFTER THE LUKA + SIRIUS ONE.

Also this is a reminder that Lancelot was probably the only one who has seen Jonah at his weakest before MC came along. It’s probably to be expected, since they’ve known each other for literally more than half their lives and also since Lancelot saved Jonah.

And technically Luka has known Jonah for the longest time, but I doubt that Jonah will ever show weakness in front of Luka because he considers himself as Luka’s protector, but it’s different in front of Lance. I feel like he can show his weaker side to Lance, and it just emphasizes how deep the relationship between them is.

SO GET READY FOR THE JONALOT FEELS WHEN THIS ONE COMES OUT.

Jonah: what is your ideal proposal?

OK I feel like this one is either gonna be super romantic or super cheesy. Or both, considering the type of person that Jonah is. But I’m gonna love it no matter what bc 1) Jonah can make even the most embarrassing situations funny and touching and 2) I’m too weak for my mille-feuille boi.

.

The screenshots for the “Peek at Romance” thing is here:

[Translation:

My dear Queen of Hearts, Jonah Clemence.

Jonah: In that party, every heir of the Clemence family will...

Jonah: Publicly introduce his fiancee, receive the acknowledgment and blessing of the whole clan, and finally step into the halls of marriage.

“What is a happy ending?”

--It’s when, the person who cannot be replaced becomes family.

Luka: Even though my brother is troublesome, and sometimes overly enthusiastic, but from now on please take care of him.

--It’s when, you become allies with the person you met.

Levie: Who hurt MC!? I’ll destroy that guy...!

Jonah: Calm down, Levie Castell. See who’s your true enemy clearly!

When he couldn’t provide an answer, it made tears overflow from his eyes.

And--while looking for an answer, it’s also possible to lose something.

Dalim: Thanks. Goodbye, princess.

Dean: I couldn’t ask any of the things I’ve been wondering before he ran...

But even so, we will still advance forward bravely.

This is all to receive the answer--to have a happy ending.

Jonah: From now on, everyone will see you as...

Jonah: The Queen of Heart’s...and also the head of the Clemence family’s wife.

Jonah: But, when there’s no one else, and when it’s just us two.

Jonah: We’ll become Jonah and MC again, and we can love each other as much as we like.

Jonah: I love you, MC.

No matter what happens, he, who is the most beautiful and pure in the world...

Will only accept a future that is even better than a happy ending...!]

I just...literally cannot express my love for this summary.

First of all I’m just gonna talk about the tone. Right off the bat MC calls him “my dear Queen” and it was just. So. CUUUUUUUUUUTE.

Also, the question and theme of “a happy ending” is brought up, and the rest of the sneak peek answers that question (it’s when the people you love become your family and the people you meet becomes your allies), but also explores how they could find those answers (Jonah crying when he couldn’t find an answer and advancing forward bravely because they just want their happy ending). And finally we finish it off with a super Jonah-like statement, announcing that he’ll accept no less than the most perfect ending of them all!

Moving on to the information revealed...it’s pretty cool how there’s a special party for the next head of the Clemence family when they’re ready to announce their marriage and gain approval. Also, it’s kinda wild to think that Jonah will eventually become a head of the family just like his father and his grandfather before that.

AND THE PART WITH LUKA AND LEVIE ARE LITERALLY SO ADORABLE. LIKE, LUKA INSULTING JONAH BUT ALSO LEAVING HIM TO MC AND LEVIE DEFENDING MC FROM PPL WHO WOULD HARM HER IS 10/10 PERFECT

Also it seems that Dean and Dalim’s backstories might be explored more but won’t be resolved just yet. I guess we really do have to wait until their routes get released to find out.

In short, this was an amazing summary of the route. WHY DO I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER MONTH UNTIL I CAN FINALLY READ THE WHOLE THING???????????????????????????

.

Also FYI, this is all completely new to me. For the other characters’ sequels, I played it through on Ikerev JP bc I can’t wait until the releases in the TW and English version that’s like, a year later. But I didn’t read Jonah’s sequel bc my Japanese isn’t super good and I wanted to read my man’s story in a language that I can completely understand so I literally have no idea of what to expect apart from what I found out in the campaign release :3

Also also I’m probably gonna be posting for every part in the story I’m going through BC I JUST LOVE JONAH THAT MUCH. I guess it would make up for my inactivity this month ^^;

#ikemen revolution #ikerev #jonah clemence #ikerev jonah #jonah's sequel #ever after #i SCREECHED when i saw the announcement #no joke #i thought it would only come out during september #so that was definitely a pleasant surprise #i need to quickly stock up on story tickets this month #i only have around 45 rn #which means i can only read 9 parts at once #THAT IS SIMPLY NOT ENOUGH

[wantaichi]

haikyuu + skincare hcs

ever think abt how they treat their skin? probably not. but like. do they wash their face like a normal person? have a 32 step skincare routine maybe??

msg me for any character who’s not here and i’ll drop their routine for u

masterlist.

karasuno

sugawara. lives up to his title as mr. refreshing. cleanses, tones, and moisturizes. !chefs kiss! keeps a jar of aloe vera face gel in his fridge, his mom had a spare. carries around a 100-sheet pack of oil film, more out of habit than of need. good skincare just makes him feel in control of his life, ok

ennoshita. fuckin’ spotless. part of the 0.0001% who don’t sweat easily. doesn’t have a complete regimen but never skips out on cleansing and toning before bed. actually reads the product ingredients and googles the benefits before buying. neutrogena type of guy. 

asahi. facial scrubs are his holy grail. like. dead skin? stubborn hair follicles? haha not on his watch ヾ( ･`⌓´･)ﾉﾞ trims his goatee every 3-4 week bc a well-groomed beard goes hand in hand with proper skincare. a sucker for aromatic products. lavender? shea butter? SOLD.

daichi. “healthy lifestyle is key to healthy skin“ typa dude. rly just thinks natural is the way to go. drinks 8 glasses of water, eats his veggies, exercises regularly, gets 8 hours of sleep. sounds like smth off wikihow if u ask me. probably is.

tsukishima. cetaphil hoe. brand loyalty embodied. on it for 5++ years, and never once considered switching. BUT. his routine ends at step 1. cleanse. and that’s it. the fuck he need a 32 step skincare routine for? long as he gets a day’s worth of grime and dirt off his face, he gucci

yamaguchi. sensitive skin’s got him constantly changing/exploring different products. rode on tsukki’s cetaphil agenda for the first few years of puberty (rly just out of curiousity) but dropped out when his skin got used to it. thinks pimple patches are a blessing to mankind.

tanaka. fuck. chaotic greasy. asks for oil film from suga just to stick it on his forehead, lets it stay there. uses whatever’s in the bathroom to wash off, aka majority of saeko’s products. got yelled at once to “get his greasy ass over here” and got slabbed with aztec healing clay mask. converted to clay mask hoe after 20 minutes. “mm this shit’s dope!”

nishinoya. fuck. chaotic greasy part ii. but make it baby face. only does skincare when chillin at the tanakas. homie got him to try the clay mask bc chick’s dig that. “bro, u mean the mask or boys who do the mask?” “both bro” “awshit bro gimme that” thinks splashing some water twice a week is enough

kageyama. ? this yalls mans? oblivious to the whole concept of skincare, only acknowledges general hygiene. uses whatever’s on the soap holder to wash his face. probably dove. doesnt really have much skin problems to begin with, only breaks out once a year. living proof that god has favorites.

hinata. only started taking skincare seriously that time a huge ass zit grew on his chin. yachi offered him her unfinished bottle of cosrx (she’s a hoarder and u kno it), and has since been giving him all her leftover bottles. basically gets to use good quality products for free smh

nekoma

kuroo. not very big on the idea of skincare per se, but supports any brand on that cruelty-free and vegan agenda. reads the product ingredients like a children’s book. “mm phenoxyethanol and retinyl palmitate.. i’ll take it.” always leaves the saleslady stunned.

kenma. too lazy to adopt a routine. but regularly uses his mom’s facial wash. you know. those mom brands. has a stash of facemasks from lev’s trip to korea —> only form of skincare he actually appreciates bc he can simultaneously play his games and be all bout dat self care 

lev. abuses his perks of having a sister. casually uses all alisa’s imported, high end stuff. la prairie. estee lauder. la mer. and she doesn’t mind bc her “levochka deserves all the finest things”. boujee ass russians

yaku. baby face. when god made it rain collagen, he was freestylin in a pool full of it while we was all sleepin. doesn’t exert much effort, just cleanses and tones bc it’s part of proper hygiene. girls envy him. parents in their 40s wanna be him. 

seijoh

oikawa. SKINCARE HOE KING. fuckin high maintenance. goes to the derma for his monthly laser facial treatment. on broke days, he settles for a diamond peel. skin so smooth it puts the entire female population to shame. spends his savings on those clinique eye creams. probably modeled for the face shop once

iwaizumi. homie reeks of male cleanser. might either dove men or nivea men. there’s no in between. oikawa internally screams everytime he witnesses his bff wash his face. two words. aggressive. rubbing. bordering on hostile he might actually skin his face off

mattsun and makki. fuck. drugstore cleansers. the ones that come in sachets. agreed to take turns in buying bundles for sharing. sometimes sneaks a pinch from oikawa’s clinique products when he’s not looking. haha dumb hoe. may have an addiction to charcoal nose pore strips just so they can compare blackheads

fukurodani

bokuto. buys whatever’s on sale idfk. genuinely wants to get on kuroo’s go green agenda but too lazy to look around the store. normally just uses the bubbles from his soap or shampoo. his belief: if it cleans his hands and his ass, then it can fuckin clean his face too

akaashi. healthy lifestyle + decent regimen = pretty skin. cleanses and tones. tried his mom’s aloe vera face gel once and got hooked. shit’s relaxing as hell. owns a bunch of facemasks, sometimes uses but keeps forgetting to take them off before falling asleep. uwu af

dateko

futakuchi. doesn’t have a routine cause “who tf needs that” and “obviously not me.” or so he says. secretly the biggest spender on skincare in all of dateko. owns a bunch of anti wrinkle products and probably one of those jade rollers. but no one needs to know that. just wants everyone to think he’s naturally pretty

aone. told by futakuchi that “knitting your brows too much causes premature wrinkles, but not like i’m an expert on that hhhahaha dont get me wrong.” can’t rly do anything bout it. he was born with that face. also buys whatever’s on sale

shiratorizawa

ushijima. surprisingly blemish free? but not entirely smooth? just spotless? basically a rock? never went past step 1: cleanse. never realized he’s been skipping out the 31 next steps. cetaphil hoe.

tendou. dry. crusty. compensates by sweating a lot through practice. might be effective if he’d stop leaving the foam on longer than recommended, thus leaving his skin dryer than his love life. yeah, i went there.

shirabu. flawless at first glance. until you lift those uneven ass bangs. tbh its nothing serious except “are we gonna ignore the fact that his whiteheads follow the shape of his bangs” as pointed out by tendou. uses whatever cleanser his mom buys for him

semi. decent skin care routine. a big boy who’s fairly knowledgeable on other brands outside cetaphil and dove/garnier/nivea men. takes him less than 5 minutes to pick a product bc he’s tried them all, knows what works, knows his skin type in and out. stan semi for clear skin.

see inarizaki + sakusa here

#actually #stan all of them for clear skin #oikawa goes to the derma and u cant convince me otherwise #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu scenarios #hq #oikawa torū #akaashi keiji #kuroo tetsurou #tsukishima kei #kageyama tobio #sugawara koushi #tendou satori #kozume kenma #iwaizumi hajime #karasuno #nekoma #aoba johsai #dateko #shiratorizawa #hqscen@rio

[djemsostylist]

Every once in a while a show sort of creeps up on you, you know? You don't really expect much of it, and then it sort of quietly wows you. Ada Masalı is that show.

At its surface, AM is about a city girl who falls for a small town boy, and all the clichés that entails, and that is the core of the story. I think that's part of why it's so good--bc this story had a premise and it's kept that premise solid. City girl moves to small town and falls in love with a local and everyone learns lessons along the way.

But AM takes the tropes and clichés and does them well. I've written before about how they take the basics and give them just enough "oomph" to make them special. I'll quote myself here, if I may:

Haziran and Poyraz both seem to fit into pretty typical roles: gruff, silent man and bubbly, talkative woman. But they’ve given each character enough nuance to move them out of the typical mold. Yes, Haziran is bubbly and talkative and a little overly loud, but she has a reason for it–silence in her childhood meant anger and fighting with her mother, and she learned how to fill the silence with talking. She is also very competent at her job, genuinely kind, smart, and driven. Poyraz is the “strong, silent” type, but he manages to subvert the “asshole” which far too often comes with the role. Like Haziran, he has some difficulties in his past, but he also seems well adjusted, smart, genuinely kind, focused, and again, competent. He and Haziran are true equals in this show, which is rare in romcom couples, particularly Turkish ones. They both are in similar financial situations, they both seem to have similar philosophies and outlooks, and, perhaps most importantly, they are both head over heels for each other and they both know it, even if they are unable to say it out loud just yet.

At the time when I wrote the above piece, I believe we were just before episode 6 or 7, so the secret hadn't been revealed yet, and at the time I speculated that it was likely to drop before their relationship started, and I was correct. This show continues to take the obvious and turn it on its head.

Poyraz and Haziran are one of the few dizi couples, and certainly the only romcom couple, I've seen where they have entered into a relationship that isn't built on a fragile house of cards held together by mutual attraction. This couple is completely and totally all in, and it makes sense. They've had conversation upon conversation about their parents, their past, their fears, their insecurities, their concerns. They've seen each other vulnerable and hurting and scared and been there for each other at their lowest. They have complete and total trust in each other, in their love for each other, in their relationship.

There is attraction yes, certainly, god is there ever, but there is also a deep affection. They like each other, which may seem a silly thing to fixate on, but so many times with couples I ask myself "okay, but do they even like each other though?" and in this case, they genuinely do. Poyraz loves her rambling and her overreactions and the way she hops from one idea to the other but somehow always manages to make it work. He loves that she works hard and never pawns off the hard jobs and he loves how genuinely kind and caring she is. He memorizes everything because he liked her before he loved her, and that's huge. And same for her. She loves his kindness and his empathy, his ability to fix broken electronics and his stubbornness when it comes to getting his way. She loves his honesty and his pride and the way he can't ever really say no to her. I think she also really loves that he doesn't let his past affect who he is. There's a connection between them that started with a spark but grew into something actually real.

The best bit, though, is that this is the first romcom couple I've seen (there may be more) that enter the relationship on completely equal terms, no secrets, and no uncertainties. All their secrets from each other were cleared up long before they ever said I love you. They are both in a similar place life wise--financially they are both probably around equal in terms of overall assets, they both have equal romantic histories (probably a series of short term relationships but nothing big or long lasting), they both value hard work and honesty and kindness, they are both mature adults who have been "out" of their parents house so to speak (yes, both still live with their respective parents, but neither play the typical "kid" role--they both are honestly more in the caretaker role), they are both college educated with business acumen. They both have had difficulties in their past, but neither allow those issues to hurt others--they both possess enough self-awareness to know how their issues effect them personally and they both work to ensure their issues don't become someone else's burden. Poyraz helping her with her fear of water or Haziran talking him through his mother are not them burdening each other, or using their issues as a reason to avoid a relationship--on the contrary, they build their bond by supporting each other through their pain. And, and this one is perhaps most important, they both love each other equally, and they both knew it before it was ever said outloud. That Poyraz could say "I love you" and Haziran could say it right back, no hesitation, speaks volumes to where they are both individually and as a couple.

Perhaps what's been the most refreshing is them communicating, constantly. When these two fight, they share their issues, their anger, their irritation, and then they work through it. The way they talk through their issues, every time, is honestly stunning for how completely refreshing it is. When they get mad at each other, they don't act like everything is fine while actively treating the other like crap--they explain the reasons behind their anger/irritation, they listen, they talk. The scene this episode of their banter after their fight on the first date was incredibly refreshing--bc it wasn't actually fighting. Haz was upset bc Poyraz ruined their first date--which he acknowledges, apologizes for, and then makes up to her, and she accepts. Their playful flirting in the kitchen the next day is just that--fun and playful and both of them are in on it. It's not Haz treating him like shit under the guise of "comedy", it's not him purposely being an obnoxious pain in the ass. It's them being cute and flirty and light after their fight the night before, which they already solved with a text conversation.

What I love most about their relationship is that I buy it. Completely. These are two people who aren't going to run when things get tough, who aren't going to play coy about their feelings, who aren't going to fight just to fight. We've seen them be honest and straightforward in their feelings, good, bad or otherwise. We've seen them fight for each other and their relationship. We've seen them encounter problems (whether in their relationship or in life) and work through them, together. And perhaps the greatest part of their relationship is that they allow each other to be exactly who they are. They are both allowed to feel the things they feel, and the other lets them. They are given a safe space to be themselves, and to know that they will always have the support and love of the other person, no matter what.

I said I thought this show was about love, at it's core, and all the ways love manifests, and I still think that's true. But I think this show is also about happiness--and about the idea that we can't always know exactly what is going to make us happy. True happiness can't always be predicted--what you think might make you happy isn't always what actually does, and sometimes that's a hard thing to accept. All of the characters on this show have a view of the world and what will bring them joy, and one by one I think we are seeing that change. Sometimes what makes you happy is the thing you didn't expect.

This show is hardly perfect. It's a dizi, and it has it's flaws. And without knowing how long it's set to run, the chances of it losing focus is not an impossibility. But this show continues to delight and surprise--from introducing new characters like Batu who are far more than they appear, to continuing to keep us guessing with old ones, I think AM has the chance to be a romcom people remember as being special. I'm hoping right now for between 20-25 episodes, which would allow us to explore their island and it's story in the detail I think it deserves, without leaving too much room for nonsense to creep in.

I think I'll leave this here for now--sometimes a show is more than it seems, and sometimes a show is exactly what it seems. AM is both and neither, and I'd be willing to argue that it's the summer's best. The focus in the diziworld seems to be entirely on the summer's other two romcoms, but AM stays quietly getting better by the week. I look forward to what these writers have in store for us in the weeks to come!

#ada masalı #ayça ayşin turan #alp navruz #djem watches dizis #seriously if you aren't watching this show pls do #its a feel good happy show #thats well written and fun #an honestly seems to be on an upward trajectory #in terms of getting better and better

[ipatrichor]

Get away (from me) -- for the ask game send me a fic title

fuck that's a good one okay

i think for this one i'd write something angsty for either phil & revivebur or phil & ghostbur!

like maybe some kind of confrontation where we acknowledge that hey, maybe killing your suicidal son is kinda fucked up! i just think revivebur should be allowed to get upset abt it gdi, what he needed was help and it's okay for him to be hurt that phil barely protested before killing him

and i don't mean to bash phil dw! i just want to acknowledge and explore the disconnect between them especially with how wilbur grew up- he has a very human perspective, and phil has a very... distant immortal one. i genuinely believe he did his best when raising wilbur, but that doesn't mean he knew how to be the dad wilbur needed & still needs. i mean, he presumably spent most of his time either alone or w techno, and when your only like... bonds are with people who understand you care without you saying it, i think there's a lot of disconnect when it comes to a relationship with someone like wilbur, who needs to Hear It

idk if this is just a projection moment, but wilbur shows a lot of signs of someone who grew up... unloved isn't the right term because obviously phil loved him, but i don't think he knew that. not communicated to that he was loved i think is more accurate. it happens with all kinds of love languages, because people express love in different ways and sometimes they're so used to their own that they don't realize the love isn't coming across and the other person struggles to believe that the first person (in this case the parent) cares about them because it's rarely or never expressed in a way they understand. it makes sense that this is especially devastating to children, bc they don't have the tools or maturity an adult might have to go 'this is how they express love, it's not the way i do but i know it's love all the same'

this just turned into a meta on their relationship and i'd love to go more into detail abt it another time if anyone wants to hear bc it's rlly interesting, but basically their relationship was strained by miscommunication on a fundamental level from the very start, and i want them to fight and argue and finally acknowledge that it's messy and complicated and they're going to have to kinda start over if they want to build an actual healthy relationship because right now i just really don't see it in canon :'' if anything between them is going to get better then i think phil has to acknowledge that he wasn't very good at being a Human Father for a Human Child who needed a Human Father and considering he doesn't really take constructive criticism i just can't really see it happening any other way

also that one art with the line 'i needed my father, not an executioner!' is fucking banger and mmm many thoughts

#this is all c! and /rp #obviously lmao #idk if i should tag as phil crit? bc it's not intended to be but hm #let me know on that end ig #i'm not saying he's a bad person for it i genuinely believe he did his best #that just doesn't mean he did a good job tho if that difference makes sense? #pat.ramble #asks #ask game #thanks for the ask ^^ #themagpieszenith

[ratplagues]

🔥 any dishonored thing of ur choosing -deathoftheoutsider

wah okay!! i will talk a bit about the outsider and void then..i dont really wanna frame it as a Hot Take bc i have no interest in starting shit or whatever like ill interact with whatever i want to in this fandom and ignore the rest and everyone else is free to do the same but.

I do not think The Outsider is a “character” in the conventional sense, much less that it does his character or the allegory he wields any justice to be shipped with anyone in the series (at least without seriously considering the implications and framing it in a way that completes the allegory. more on this later)

the outsider and his void are an allegory for Otherness; i’m namely gonna frame it as queerness and neurodiversity, but really anything could fit as long as it’s about you feeling seen as a marginalized and othered person. he is written to represent this allegory, not to be a person with a satisfying narrative arc or dimensions. this is why some people feel that he lacks depth-- he’s not supposed to have depth compared to others in the series, he’s mostly a vehicle for what he represents, and is supposed to be easy to identify with or recognize.

he was born to a life of hardship, suffered at the hands of the rich and powerful, was ignored, cast out, etc. etc. a familiar story. poor, queer, nd, really whatever you wanna frame it as. he was a nobody outcast. in comes the envisioned, they pick him to serve as their martyr and idol without his permission. he then had his name cut away and forgotten, and was thrust onto a pedestal to spend the rest of eternity being worshipped by other outcasts who had suffered at the same hands he had. he has something greatly in common with those who worship him, including the very people who stripped his mortality from him in the first place, but because of this shared hardship (and nothing else), his own autonomous personhood was disregarded completely in favor of The Community needing someone Just Like Them to idolize. if this sounds familiar, that’s because it should!!

his humanity was taken from him, and in his place, an idol was created. his human body is frozen in stone in the center of the void-- retired. out of commission. no longer needed. he was immortalized, transcended. this is traditionally desired, although dishonored is trying to convince you that it is not actually desirable. in the age of internet content creation, you can be immortalized without even being present, without knowing about it. you become what you can do for other people, and what you cannot. people fall in love with an idea of you, the idea of you being like them, and other people come to hate you deeply without even knowing you. people came to hate the outsider more deeply than he ever had been when he was human-- he wasn’t seen when he was human. a pedestal only helps you to be seen. the outsider had the choice made for him to achieve immortality in exchange for the simple joys of being un-known.

he spends all of doto trying to convey this idea to billie through the hollows:

"There is freedom in being hated. There is license in being cast out. Some learn this lesson a little too well."  "These people lay their thoughts, their petty wants, their murderous desires in front of me to witness. I cannot turn away." "We carry what was done to us through the rest of our endless days. No one asked if we wanted it." (i like this one. he speaks for the community-- this is a shared experience, one everyone can recognize. however, as a Queer Figure, he never asked for this. he never asked to be immortalized. i like the double meaning here)

not to mention, the entire extent of the outsider’s Sole ability and influence on the real world is to “choose” people and give them untold power over others. this is a fun ironic twist on what marginalized groups endure from powerful people, (dishonored is largely about power imbalances and socioeconomic hierarchies) but it’s also fun to think about in the context of the role model/fan framing-- so many worshippers give their lives to be “chosen” by him. it’s easily framed as an exaggeration of otherwise very real power imbalances and often the flagrant breaching of boundaries existing between creators and fans.

and on the subject of the VOID...ohht he void.....

the void should be a haven for queer folks. for nd folks. it’s wanted by so many to be a safe space, it should be, it’s the Other World! it’s renounced by the abbey, crusaded against, even. but it isn’t. it’s just this limitless, eons-old horizon that hungers and starves for something to fill it. if the outsider is the lament of queer idolatry, the void is the lament of queer Hunger. it is roaming, and restless. it does not belong to the outsider; the outsider cannot survive without it. it’s the desire to belong, not a place of belonging.

the void craves this idol, this outsider-- i, for one, have often experienced hunger for a truly moral and just role model, someone to make the world Right, and i know this is another shared feeling. those who worship the outsider, who drive themselves mad trying to see him or be chosen by him, are suffering from this idol hunger. you see this in a lot of queer and nd kids and young adults. i grew up just having my life and interests like, punctuated by different fixations on different people that i didn’t know at all, only fell in love with the idea of. it happens a lot.

there’s a couple more doto quotes that really highlight this for me:

"They carve my mark into the old bones bleached by the sun. They carve my mark into their skin. They learn true hunger in the Void." "All these charms, these runes and fetid offerings on shrines made for me, will be nothing more than objects worn of meaning. Bones and dead things, thrown into the dirt."

“They learn true hunger in the Void.” is something that i wanna touch on real quick. people can spend their lives obsessing over the idea of what they think the void will cure for them, will fix in their lives, only to find out that it’s just a hollow manifestation of the emptiness they’ve felt all their lives. it’s not the needs met, but the need itself. you have to make the home, it doesn’t already exist and you can’t fucking run to it. it is heartbreaking, frustrating, one of the bleakest messages i’ve ever encountered in a game, but i’ve never felt more seen. by submitting to these ideas, the idea of a perfect unhuman human and the idea of a perfect otherworldly home, you are surrendering your humanity. you’re not only being transformed by the powers gained (if they are gained), you’re essentially dissolving with hunger after never having these needs met. you see so many people in these games whittling themselves down to nothing but base need. empty apartments occupied only by shrines, sometimes containing their corpses. journals of people dedicating their lives to the worship of the outsider, always ending darkly.  "I will find this empty place. Somehow the key to open the Void will fall into my hands. In time, I will learn the secret and he will call to me as he called to her."

not to mention The New Envisioned-- prolonged exposure to the void will always, without fail, turn a human into silver void stone. these creatures can no longer interact with or acknowledge the mortal world. they have surrendered themselves to hunger, and cannot be saved. this is celebrated by the cult, honored by them, even. i honestly like....i pity them, and i hate them, and i recognize that i’ve been those people, lmao. when i was at my worst as a teenager, i wasnt so much a person as i was just a shell full of hunger and heartbreak. my personality was defined by who i was a fan of. i think i definitely was Less Human then. the cult of the outsider is a universal experience!!

dishonored, at its core, is a celebration of humanity. it asks you to celebrate human emotion and weakness despite greed and bigotry. the powers are not to be wanted, they are to be ignored, refused. it is human to hunger, but it is Queer and Divergent to make hunger your life’s meaning, to need to learn the secret, find the key, be chosen and loved and cherished, to be made whole by some perfect thing. to find your humanity in something un-human. dishonored sees all that, mourns it with you, and then asks you to find humanity in each other !! love the spine of your lover, the blood draining down the docks, the pause to stretch languidly in the sun of a work day.

and finally...on the topic of outsider shipping....i dont think that, in his god form, it does him much justice to be shipped with anyone. he’s not much of a person, just a projection of his former self and a vehicle for his allegory as discussed-- im sure he could be shipped like this, but it just isn’t satisfying to me in any way. however, let’s talk a bit about his lethal and nonlethal ending. DOTO asks you to make a choice. is it better to give him an abrupt and merciful ending, after deciding that the fury he’s endured at the hands of others’ famine is too much trauma for any mortal to live with? or will you decide that it’s only fair to give him a chance to live the life he never got to, to return his humanity that was taken without his consent? if you choose to free him from the void, i think you can very very easily make the argument that he can be shipped with corvo, or anyone else that can easily be shipped w/ ppl. he’s finally free to live his life as a queer man, can explore the simple and complex joys of being human with other people, navigate the hills and valleys he never got to before. corvo’s just a nice pick bc 1) experienced human/inexperienced human is good, 2) they know each other, but they don’t. this is a good setup. 3) corvo is an older queer man and uhh you cant convince me otherwise lol! and older queer/younger queer is a self indulgence for me. also corvo is just nice. i think he would enjoy helping the outsider navigate his new humanity.

just some thoughts i have running through my head all hours of the day :) this is really long cuz its a combination of a lot of infodumps from discord lmfao

#m #doto #death of the outsider #dishonored #Anonymous #long post

[outlier-roddy]

*writes 1250 words of robot thesis*

So full disclosure, I need you all to know that this is Just My Opinion, i’m in no way claiming to be the final voice on the subject or anything.  Just my thoughts and how i address this AND im only posting it bc ppl said they would read it lol

Tw for discussion of abuse and violence bc megastar

This all started because I noticed that Mae Catt shipped megastar.  And i said to myself, hey, isn’t cyberverse like, the most unhealthy continuity to ship megastar in?? And then i was like well maybe not.  And i started thinking about it.

Cyberverse megastar is probably the best example of how megatron and starscream’s relationship works. [SPOILERS]  In the entire run of the show, starscream is always motivated by megatron in some way shape or form.  At first, he’s under megatron’s command as a seeker; then he betrays him; is killed by megatron; comes back to take his revenge against megatron for killing him; and finally comes back to take his revenge again by judging megatron and the entire universe ‘guilty’.  

Starscream and megatron’s relationship is called ‘abuse’ a lot-- i wouldn’t say that it’s like that for every case, specifically because starscream is an active member of the cause-and-effect that he and megatron have (starscream betrays megatron- megatron takes revenge against starscream- rinse and repeat).  As we know there is no such thing as ‘mutual abuse’ so it’s more likely that starscream is a participant in the dynamic rather than a passive sufferer of it.

That’s another point.  I don’t have to like starscream to acknowledge that he is a complex and interesting character with a lot of complicated moments and motivations.  Similarly, just because I like megatron doesn’t mean I can’t acknowledge that he is an angry, vengeful, brutal asshole a lot of the time, specifically in cyberverse and tfp.  These two characters clash in the ways that we’ve seen historically in tf.  Starscream is self-serving and constantly seeks to undermine megatron, and megatron responds in his own way, which is to say violence.

That’s the big point, that a lot of ppl have pointed out and that some fanfics (and even continuities) have explored.  Starscream’s ambition is to overthrow megatron and become leader of the decepticons.  But once he’s done that, what does he have left as motivation?  in the tv shows, in particular it is implied that he would be exuberant for a few years, but eventually left empty and passionless, without the drive or challenge of overthrowing megatron.  Idw did explore this a few times letting starscream be the leader (I’m thinking specifically in the issue where hot rod steals the matrix-- he was seen to be depressed and bored with megatron gone.  Post-war comic starscream I’m less familar with, but it doesn’t fit my point as well, as he never overthrew megatron and was instead allowed to be leader through different circumstances.  the megastar dynamic i’m most familar with is in the shows, so please don’t try and explain comics megastar because i literally just don’t want to know lsdkjfhbsdh)

the megastar relationship is unhealthy in these ways: starscream is megatron’s subordinate; starscream and megatron are constantly attempting to do violence to each other; starscream is shown to need megatron’s presence to function [and i don’t really agree with this one-- i think starscream should be able to be a character in his own right without constantly having to relate to megatron, but the writers rarely give us that]; and while starscream needs megatron, megatron does not need starscream.

That brings me to megarod, because a LOT of people compare it to megastar and equate it on the same level to say that it’s abuse.  That’s where i disagree, because while i understand how the relationship dynamic with megastar is unhealthy, I don’t think that the same things apply to the megarod dynamic.  In mtmte, rodimus and megatron are at the same power level (at least in title-- there is a part of me that would love to explore just how much power rodimus really had over megatron in mtmte, because you know that one phone call to optimus would have sent megatron back to be executed).  Rodimus is never shown to be in need of megatrons presence or interaction-- rodimus functioned perfectly well before megatron showed up on the ship, and rodimus functioned perfectly well after megatron was left behind in the other universe.  Megatron grows to have respect for rodimus, while he never grew to respect starscream in any continuity as far as I’m aware-- megatron saw starscream as a competent SIC, a useful subordinate, and a threat, to reduce it down.  Similarly, rodimus grew to respect and care for megatron as well, as evidenced by how they interacted at the end of the comic.  They had mutual respect, at the very least.

What a lot of people like to point out is this:

Which.  Yeah.  look, that’s a big deal, especially to rodimus.  I’m a rodimus fan before a megarod fan, and there’s no pretending that being nearly killed by megatron was traumatic to rodimus.  Hell, he even says this:

Which is totally understandable.  Rodimus is traumatized as a result of being shot, and there’s no dancing around that.  As a responsible person, it’s important for me to acknowledge that he definitely, definitely has a lot of complicated feelings about megatron, and he still has that residual trauma from being shot in the chest.  Like, damn roddy I would too.

HOWEVER.  This is where i’ll make the comparison.  Rodimus’ injury happened during wartime, under the circumstances that he was a member of the opposing army that had broken into a decepticon base, stolen something important, and happened to run into the Leader Of The Decepticons, who currently was really fucking pissed off because of a whole lot of shit and was looking to murder anyone and everyone (iirc, megatron also was a massive dick to starscream not long after the shooting roddy incident).  Rodimus was shot as a soldier, under circumstances that absolutely would not happen EXCEPT in a war.  

Megatron and starscream’s relationship does NOT need a war to exist.  Megatron and starscream would have the same dynamic if megatron were the leader of some other kind of force, or if the decepticons were currently at peace, or if the autobots were gone from the equation entirely.  Starscream would always look to overthrow megatron and megatron would retaliate-- and it can’t be explained away by the fact that it was wartime.  None of what starscream and megatron do to each other in g1, even, need a war to make sense-- starscream is power hungry and backstabs megatron.  Megatron is inconvenienced slightly but gains the upper hand back and punishes him.  God, we don’t even have to TALK about tfp megastar.  Imo, that’s the absolute worst continuity for megastar.  

However, that’s the important difference i made.  I feel morally okay shipping two characters that had one violent interaction in the past under the circumstances that it was wartime (and i mean, hell, if you use war crimes as an excuse not to ship ppl say goodbye to megop lmao), ESPECIALLY because they grow together and eventually have a different relationship entirely by the end of the media in question.  Megatron and starscream’s relationship, though, is nearly static (and yeah, that’s due a lot to the writers, as i said).  I wouldn’t feel comfortable shipping them in any context, especially a healthy one.  I mean, that’s just what I feel like, but that’s why I feel okay with megarod and not megastar.

#personal tag #meta #mtmte #maccadam #megarod #megastar #yeah here u all go! #this is as much as i could remember #it's all over the place and not organized but #u know what its more comprehensible than it would be if i talked it out loud

[mieczyhale]

mace im sorry i don't have coherent thoughts but i'm so just like,,, what was klaus this season. what was ben. the cult was pointless to klaus' character. the things that matter to klaus' character were ignored. the dave stuff was a lot of nothing. i felt like the possession thing shouldve been huge for ben and klaus' relationship but we're supposed to think klaus feeling violated is funny and inconsequential? ben going to the light was just shoved in at the end? i just---what???? who??

i’m on the same page as you, anony, especially in coherency lmfao

klaus this season was.. not totally bad, but i think most of that can be put on robert for his acting and how well he knows his own character bc the writers clearly didn’t know what was up (or maybe they did and playing him off this season as comedic relief, having him tossed to the side and mistreated, is going to play into s3 somehow. idk. i’m not writing off any possibility because overall the writers have done really really well with everything else so in my soul i feel like there has to be a reason they did what they did to him this season yknow??) for all the jokes they had him making and stuff, i think robert definitely played klaus the way we as fans know him - suffering constantly but unwilling to let anyone actually see that and if they do he’s gonna make it sound like a joke. he’s not gonna act serious because that leads to pain and he’s had more than enough of that. HOWEVER. i am genuinely so so pissed that he didn’t get to fight or really use his powers this season. and the part before ben sacrifices himself where klaus finally got up the courage to try and help, the fact that he didn’t succeed - that it wasn’t klaus who saved the day - is just... sldflksd GOD I HATE IT. oh and the scene towards the end where everyone gets shot and the one remaining swede kills the handler?? THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN KLAUS. he should have come back to life as he does, as is PART OF HIS POWERS, grabbed a gun that he knows how to use well - thank you vietnam - and he should have shot the bitch. but no. we didn’t even get that. vanya got klaus’s levitation and diego got klaus’s telekinesis and klaus got ??? a cowboy hat. which i mean looks good on him and he deserves it but it doesnt make up for *gestures at everything* and tbh even that was tainted because one of the siblings says “50$ if we leave him here” when klaus runs to grab the hat. seriously??!! SERIOUSLY??! it’s not funny, it’s just more of people not caring about klaus and thinking abandoning him is a fun joke to make ANYWAY. onto things you actually mentioned sdlkdsjf;ls i think the cult wasn’t pointless to his character necessarily, i think it did provide something, but it wasn’t used to its fullest extent. we got little things like klaus talking about it making him claustrophobic and making him feel like his skin is on fire, and his followers become something he cant escape even though he desperately wants too - it’s like having the ghosts all over again except he’s sober and these are live people who can touch him. but the show never actually out loud makes that comparison when they should have. i think it would have helped the cult thing seem less random. as for the dave thing.. i don’t think it was a lot of ‘nothing’ but again i think they could have definitely done more with it. it lets klaus see dave again, in a way, and it shows us more about both of them and the relationship they had. we learn more about dave, who he is, the kind of people he had around him and the environment he grew up in. it shows us that klaus and dave talked about all kinds of things, nothing was too mundane or unimportant. it shows us that three years after dave’s death klaus is still grieving and is still 100% in love. and it shows us that klaus isn’t always as selfish as people assume right alongside another hit to the face (oof unintentional wording) of just how much he loved dave. he wanted to save dave’s life so badly he made a fool of himself, put up with homophobia, took a hit to the face, and still kept trying to stop him from enlisting even though, per the last timeline, it would mean they’d never meet. klaus is willing to have dave never know him, is willing to handle that pain and heartbreak pretty much forever, as long as dave lives. my heart literally cannot handle it the possession thing. i haven’t stopped being angry and uncomfortable and disgusted by it since i saw it like 2 days ago now. that plot the writers really fucked up on it was a big thing for their relationship but not in any way that lead to growth or understanding or power control or ANYTHING. i love ben but i have so many fucking problems with him after watching s2 that i almost wanna take my love back tbh. the writers tried to make it seem like what ben was doing was okay - because he was angry and frustrated with klaus, because klaus wasn’t doing what he wanted, because klaus couldn’t stay sober, etc. like any of that makes possessing someone without their consent okay... or threatening to possess someone the moment their guard is down (leaving klaus paranoid and afraid to sleep).. or getting permission to possess someone and then refusing to leave (and its double garbage when diego encourages ben to continue possessing klaus. diego’s reason was gross and even if he hadnt given a reason he was still encouraging ben to not give klaus’s body back to him. which like.. im sure klaus can see and hear what’s going on. so he now is aware that his brother would rather have ben-wearing-klaus than actual klaus. the amount that would fucking hurt. a nyway) klaus never really got to talk about how it made him feel, not in any situation where anyone was listening. he never got to go off on ben for what he did, and what he was about to do, even though he had every right to. ben kind of knew how klaus felt about it but he showed very clearly that he didnt care. ben just did not fucking care about klaus this season. and it wasnt a ‘tough love’ thing like they tried to do in s1. it was just horrible and it hurt to watch. and i feel like s2 ben wouldnt have apologized to klaus even if he had been seriously confronted. we now know that klaus has this power. and we know that it can easily be abused by someone else. and i feel like that could tie into his ability to make the ghosts corporeal and such. it could definitely work as an interesting lead into exploring more of his many powers. and it could have worked as a way to bring ben and klaus closer without anyone getting hurt or violated. but.. for s2.. it wasnt used that way. it was used as a way to degrade and humiliate klaus. and they clearly wanted us to find it funny. it was one of the least funny things to happen all season. actually probably THE least funny thing. right along with nobody giving a shit when they thought klaus was having a seizure or OD-ing (both during their meeting with reginald and in the alley when they were supposed to meet up to use the briefcase five got from the handler), AND OF COURSE  nobody taking klaus seriously, paying attention to him, or caring about him (except for allison at some points) and ben finally going into the light at the end..  was kind of shoved in?? but i think what made it feel that way, for me at least, wasn’t so much the placement or timing of it but that it wasn’t really acknowledged afterwards?? it just.. happened, and we were all heartbroken, and on screen... nothing. it felt like a very sudden end to his storyline and yeah they could have done a little more to make it feel like a natural end for him thanks for the ask and sharing your thoughts on s2 with me~!! <3

#ask #tua spoilers

[whatshockey]

one for the road - a.m.

in which two people who were committed to hating each other find an activity much less draining. or at least emotionally.

word count: 3,921

warnings: mentions of alcohol, drugs, cursing. and smut! the whole shebang.

a/n: i really hate this man. like really hate him. i’m so obsessed with him, it’s disgusting. so i attempted to write something to make me feel better. and let’s face it - the only reason we find auston attractive is bc he plays hockey. i said what i said.  

-

She strutted into hell in heels so high they could be used as weapons, carrying her demons on both shoulders and her head held high. Bodies were strewn, one with another, in every corner of the room, attacking each other’s lips in some fatal attempt to feel alive in the exchange of body heat. It was so warm that the apartment itself could snap a cigarette awake, and she could feel her skin burn with every sip of poison she continued to take. He was no criminal, that much she knew. But the way he looked at his next victim, with mocha tinted eyes soaking every crevice of her skin and bones, should’ve been considered a crime itself. And she couldn’t take her eyes off of him no matter how hard she tried.

Her friend noticed rather quickly, chuckling as he picked out her scowl that grew by the minute. His smile shone brightly in the dimly lit space, and he had to crouch over her shoulder to reach her ear, gently moving a lock of hair behind.

“Careful,” he warned, his velvet voice soothing the dull ache in her head. “If he catches your stare, he might turn to stone.”

She was quick to shove him off with a scoff, rolling her eyes at his remark to the Greek mythological character, and in turn took an audible gulp of the drink that caused her face to tighten up as it rolled down her throat. 

“Fuck off, Freddie.”

The wallflowers hadn’t moved much the whole night, finding refuge in the corner of the kitchen of his teammate’s apartment rather than finding another to occupy their time. Had it been any other night, she could be spotted with her back pressed against a stranger of the opposite gender, and sometimes, if you’re lucky of course, one of the same connected to her front, lips dancing dangerously closer as their bodies tangled. The dane next to her, however, always watched the scenes unfold around him, and at times she wondered what sins his gaze held.

The two became good friends over their shared love for the tainted drink they both held at the moment, meeting each other at a bar amongst mutual friends while the rest of his teammates worried about buying drinks for women they’d spotted there. Admittedly, that had been his original intention, but the two laugh about it now. She’d actually been the one who insisted to pay for his drink, pretending she hadn’t known who he was as she bid goodbye with a sultry “congratulations” for the team’s win of the night. And it was safe to say she’d occupied his thoughts for the rest of the week, so much that he found himself revisiting the place they had met just a week later, spotting her at the same spot, and this time alone. He hadn’t missed a beat to acknowledge her, and invited her to sit with the rest of the team, a rosy grin to match his hair dawning on his face as he recognized the younger woman who made him feel as youthful as the rest of his teammates he had come with.

They had all quickly welcomed her into their exclusive group, warm smiles stretching across their features and jokes uttered around. The young professional was well known around the Toronto area, recognizing a few of the players from past events she’d attended. One of the players, however, held an arrogant smirk alongside his outstretched calloused hand, engulfing her contrasting soft small ones. His eyes took her in, from her bare legs to her blackened eyelashes and tousled hair as one of his dropped down into a sly wink. And she was quick to drop his hand within the same second, watching him for the rest of the night from in between two of his teammates, both taking turns in inquiring with questions about her work life and interests, to which she put on her most dazzling smile and answered with her well versed responses, ignoring the feeling creeping up her stomach when she saw the player across the bar with an arm hung loosely around the waist of a woman surely meant to be seen on a magazine cover.

She had been doing the same now, finding refuge with her closest friend of the bunch as she refilled her glass for a second time now. It was now nearing the end of the season, and the lot celebrated the victory of reaching the playoffs, knowing as the pressure picks up, this could be very well be one of the last celebrations for a while. The atmosphere felt oddly similar to that of the first night they all had met each other, which had been followed by their first home win of the season just months ago. Except this time, they had all been packed into a penthouse, expensive booze flowing through their systems and eyes red in exhaustion from a tough season, and no doubt a few drugs passed through some that were not apart of the team. She, however, stayed put, ignoring the few men who had approached her, possessing no professional association with the sport itself, and instead engaged in casual conversations with the few friends she had there, all while attempting to ignore the one man who managed to get under her skin.

He’d seen her now as she leaned elegantly against the stone countertop in a statue-like pose, and lethargically raised the hand that contained his drink towards her direction, a mocking gaze spreading across his features as he toasted to her, the reason why only he’d known.

“What a fucking asshole.”

Her friend’s deep laugh vibrated into her chest, and perhaps she would’ve found the situation amusing as well had it been between a different person. However, the man who’d taunted her from across the forest of legs in between them had proven to be everything she despised in a person, and couldn’t blame this on small interactions that prohibited a deeper connection. In fact, the two happened to spend a large amount of their free time together, with their entire friend group implementing traditions of dinners and drinks at least once a week. While all seemed to get along and truly enjoy their time together, he used his voice to boast about his latest sexual endeavor or to spit an unnecessary and borderline rude remark towards her direction, to which she just rolled her eyes and attempted to avoid confrontation about it all. It was only a matter of time, however, that the others began to notice the tension between the two personalities, both of which they had adored and desired their presences at their plans. But the shift in air would never be brought up.

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but you’re a lot more similar than you’d think,” Freddie sighed, taking a final swig of his drink and pushed it onto the counter behind them, holding his hand out in place as he motioned over to the surprisingly empty pool table. “You want to play?”

The two engaged in friendly competition, playing in pairs against Tyler Ennis and Morgan Rielly, the remaining members of the infamous single boys club she had spent so many evenings along with. They played two, maybe three rounds, and it was enough to place a smile and laugh in her throat as one of them scratched and the other sunk a ball into a pocket. Soon the rules had been replaced with their own, and the quartet hadn’t noticed the gathering of a few onlookers who shared a laugh in the chaos as well, each betting on which team would win and deciding what the losing pair would have to do as a consequence.

That hadn’t been explored, however,  as the voice of the man she had long forgotten about rang through her ears, causing her partner to turn around at his presence.

“Hey, man,” he clapped the giant on his back, squeezing his shoulder as he slid by. “Mind if I take over?”

She made eye contact with the model that, just a minute ago, was draped across his shoulder. Her piercing eyes sliced through her chest, holding a threat that pooled around her irises, and she began violently shaking her head in response at the exact moment.

“I’m actually kind of tired. You guys go ahead.”

What appeared to be a frown flashed across his features, tracing the edges of the maroon worsted cloth that lay on top of the wooden table as he took the pool stick from Freddie’s hand who’d offered it immediately.  

“You’re on a role,” William called from a little ways away, an arm around his girlfriend that was perched on his lap who immediately began nodding in agreement.

“Yeah, don’t worry,” Freddie insisted, smiling as he took in her pleading, and increasingly angered expression. “I’ll take the next round.”  

She internally cursed for having such a gentleman as a friend. His charm and patience went unmatched amongst the younger bodies in the room, and the way he leaned against the wall as a new game began made her stomach lurch. If it weren’t for the extra set of eyes taking in her reaction, she would’ve grabbed his bulky arms and begged him to stay, or followed him like a puppy afterwards. And she could almost hear him laughing at her.

Chalking the tip of her stick as she began setting the table up once again, she could feel his presence behind her as she leaned over the table to reach into the pockets for the remaining balls, defeatedly setting the table into a new game. The pair won yet another round, and that had gone to no shock against the arrogance of her new partner.

“No surprise there, eh boys?” he’d laugh, and as thrilled as she should’ve been for winning, his voice caused her to roll her eyes.

He had yet to say anything directly to her the entire night, but as she moved to leave the area, a large hand moved to grasp her own dainty wrist. 

“One on one?” he offered, a devilish smirk gracing his plump lips, squeezing as he waited for an answer.

Her body recoiled, disgusted that he would even have the nerve to touch her, and her cheeks burned in fury. The opposing pair had eventually forfeited, having lost yet another round prior against her new partner, one she didn’t want to spend a waking moment of her life with. But as her eyes casted over the rest of the apartment and she noticed her friends that she had arrived with were nowhere in sight, she let out a sigh and finally lifted her gaze to meet his, shuddering at how soft they actually appeared to be up close.

“I’m heading out,” she sneered, pushing away his hand and trying to get around his frame blocking her.

“So am I,” he replied, stepping closer to her as she crossed her arms in defense. Her heart was beating faster, and she didn’t waste her time wondering why.

Looking over his shoulder, she saw no one paying any attention to the two enemies. Even the glare of a pair of perfectly lined eyes and darkened lids appeared to be missing.

“Where’s your girl?” she asked, moving her feet impatiently

“My girl?” he began to laugh, shrugging with a smile that refused to falter even as she glared at his reaction. “Told her to go home.”

She looked at him with an eyebrow raised, expecting him to continue and explain why he sent the dime away.

“She got a little boring.”

“Oh of course,” she started to laugh, faking her realization as she attempted not to roll her eyes. “You need to be entertained at all times like a child.”

He grabbed her waist this time, tattoos flexing across his forearm as he turned her around,pushing her into the edge of the pool table with arms on either side of her short frame.

“You’re the only one here who has a problem with me.”

“Well, we can’t all be your mom.”

His face twisted, clearly upset with the jab she took at his close relationship with his family member. And had she had any lower of an ego herself, she’d apologize, and instead voice how endearing their close relationship was.

“Why are you always such a fucking bitch?”

“I don’t have a reason to like you.” She jabbed a finger at his chest, growing more upset and far too claustrophobic for her liking by the minute.

“You treat women like absolutely shit as if you’re the most attractive player on the team, which we both know you’re not. And the only reason why you do so is to make up for the fact that you’re insecure.” She stared up into his eyes, and if she truly was Medusa like her friend had said, the snakes she’d have for hair would undoubtedly hiss in threat. “So I’m not going to waste my time trying to tolerate a little boy who parades around in designer clothes like he has a big dick, when it holds absolutely no comparison in size to his inflated ego.”

He laughs, and as beautiful as his voice was, it sounded soulless and lonely, cracking as he bit his bottom lip in narcissism and hunger.

“You’re one to talk, babe. How many blokes have you had in your bed, huh? Probably enough to get you ghosted, and that’s why you’re always so pissed.” He chuckled, taking in her low cut top that threatened to spill over any time she bent over the table before. “Or maybe that’s just it. You need someone to fuck you senseless, to let off steam or something.”

Her palms moved against his chest, attempting to push him away. But he continued, refusing to budge.

“Yknow, it’s a shame you won’t ever shut up,” his eyes flickered to her lips, bringing a thumb to her bottom one and pulled it from from her top teeth. “Such pretty lips that could be used for so much more.”

“If you come any closer, I’ll bite you.”

He raised an eyebrow, stifling a laugh. “Oh, so you play like that, huh?”

It was then that she noticed how exhausted he truly looked, small bags drawn under his eyes and his otherwise youthful face held no color. He’d looked more lifeless than he ever had, in fact most of the players did reaching so far into the season, and yet she could honestly say he also never looked more handsome. But she’d never dare to say that out loud.

“The Uber is three minutes away,” he began, daring to edge even closer to her, breath fanning over his face as their noses touches. “I’ll tell them to wait for two, and if you’re not in the backseat with me after one, I promise to leave you alone until the day we die.”

Her eyes narrowed, skin burning under his touch that he had yet to remove on her waist.

“And how do I know you won’t break your promise?”

He smiled, bright and perfectly carved teeth that could blind her vision traced her ear as he dipped down to whisper.

“How do I know you don’t want me to?”

And with a final wink, he turned his back to her and left, never turning around to send her his infamous smirk or remotely any confirmation that she had heard him correctly.

Her feet moved before her mind did, and suddenly she was tripping over he own heels to catch him on his way down on the elevator, her foot coming in contact with the two doors about to close. She could barely manage a “thank you for having us” to the host before she found herself sharing a brief gaze with the man who stood waiting, and within a split second she was backed against the mirrored walls of the elevator just seconds later, legs hiked up against either side of his waist as the throbbing in between her thighs grew. His lips attacked her neck, bruising her on every inch of skin that was left uncovered and accessible, and she could see her reflection over his shoulder with a hand cradling his head to her collarbone, lips parted in a dangerous pout, vulnerable to allowing any noise to slip past.

He groaned against her throat as the elevator dinged, signaling that the two had reached the bottom floor in what felt way faster than the speed an elevator normally ran at. His hand moved from under her thighs to her own, setting her back down onto the ground and dragging her body out of the doors behind his own, opening the door to the car waiting outside and motioned for her to climb in. Before she could get properly settled, she felt his mouth back on her neck, this time dipping lower to trace the curve of her breast as he pulled the sleeves of her top down her shoulder.

They were being so reckless, and the awkward cough from the driver omitted no less. He had forced a moan out from the back of her throat without a care in the world, groaning just as he heard her voice in a state of such desperation, and he didn’t give her enough time to feel embarrassed before ghosting a hand over her clothed core.

Her eyes flew open, and she hadn’t even realized that they were closed before, making immediate eye contact with the driver in the rearview mirror that left her feeling both nervous and extremely turned on. She attempted to shake him off, or at least before they earned a low Uber rating, but instead pushed her deeper into the cramped back seats, sucking and biting harsher against her jaw and throat. And it was certainly not the first time she caught the driver watching them after.

Not long after, or what could’ve been a long time she had no clue whatsoever, the car eventually slowed down, and the back door on his side had flown open before it came to a full stop. He jumped out, muttering a quick thanks to the driver with a strong grip on her hand.

“Hey, you’re Auston Matthews right?” the driver called after him, but half came off muffled as she climbed and held her back to him.

“Nope, never heard of him.”

He slammed the door shut, stifling the laugh that left her mouth with his own, teeth pulling her bottom lip into his.

The two practically ran into his place, and her feet ached that she began wishing he’d been the type to massage her after they’d messed around enough to satisfy each other. Instead, he kicked the door closed behind her, pressing her against the door which caused to wince as the doorknob dug into the bottom of her spine, pushing her chest into his.

He led the two towards his bedroom, throwing her clothes off to the side and expertly unlatching her bra to connect his lips to her breasts. She began kneeling, mouth watering and eyes desperate for her thirst to be quenched as she fondled with his belt buckle to feel a strong grip in the back of her hair, balling it into his fist as he tilted her face up to look at his own.

“As much as I’d love that, we’re not wasting any time tonight, beautiful. Turn around.”

She pouted, but he had given no option as he swiftly picked her up and twisted her body so that she face the wall behind the headboard, soft sheets rubbing against her hardened nipples and knuckles gripping the expensive material in anticipation.

“God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted you like this,” he choked out slightly out of breath, taking her in as he rubbed slow circles along her dampened core that ached for his own.

“If you’re going to talk this much, at least say something worthwhile.”

A harsh sting came across her ass, sending sparks of electricity and desire racing through her veins as she said something other than his name followed by a few moans in the past hour.

His fingers threaded through her hair again, catching in knots and tangles as he pulled her back against his chest.

“The only time you’re allowed to talk is to ask for permission.”

She would’ve bit back with another snarky remark had he not slid in so easily, forcing her to catch herself from asking for permission to cum right then and there. It was almost embarrassing how wet he managed to get her by barely touching her, that the only plausible theory would be that he’d somehow left her turned on from every encounter they ever had. Except this time around, he had her fully stretched around him, hugging and squeezing his length in every way imaginable. She’d never felt so full and so good with a man before, and she couldn’t remember how to fake an orgasm even if she had tried.

Stumbling forward, she pressed her face against the sheets as tears clouded over her eyes, the only sounds that could be heard in the room were her cries and his groans at the sound of their skin slapping against each other’s. His large palms engulfed her thighs and hips, twisting her body so that he could still see her face in pure bliss

“So this is what you wanted all along? To get properly fucked, huh?” he pushed into her at an incredible force. “Well, sweetheart, all you had to do was ask.”  

“Auston,” she begged, hands cramping as her grip on the sheets tightened. “Please.”

It had only taken a few more strokes before he reached a hand down in between them where their bodies connected, collapsing on top of her as she cried out at the added pressure and groaning into her neck for a final time that night as he pulled out to finish on her stomach. And if she had any bit of logic left in her system, she would’ve slapped him for it. But she had been in so much pleasure that it almost hurt, and instead she focused on calming her own heart race, struggling to open her eyes to face reality.

A muscular arm wrapped itself around her torso as she began to get up, this time gently and almost needy. She found it amusing that although he would never voice it, he was in fact encouraging her to stay. And she was allowing herself to fall for it.

“Oh, so you cuddle now?” she teased, falling back into his embrace as his breathing began to already slow down.

“It’s apart of the special we have going on.”

She snorted, rolling into his chest as his arms wrapped tighter around her. She could still feel him still half hard against her thighs tangled with his own, but the two had been too exhausted to continue. There had been so many thoughts beginning to race through her mind. Had anyone seen them leave together? Did she have work tomorrow? What day even was it? She decided to relax for now, finding little care as her body remained buzzing from the work out she had just put it through.

And the guy next to her whom she claimed to absolutely loath? She’d deal with that in the morning.

#auston matthews #auston matthews imagine #auston matthews fanfiction #auston matthews fic #toronto maple leafs #maple leafs #hockey #hockey writing #nhl #nhl writing #nhl imagines #nhl imagine #hockey imagine #auston matthews imagines #hockey imagines #hockey fic #hockey fanfiction #auston matthews smut #freddie anderson #tyler ennis #morgan rielly #william nylander #kasperi kapanen #nhl smut #smut

[violet-sabres]

Some quick observations re: TROS and some "reylo"musings (spoilers)

- the editing removed A LOT of emotional pay-offs for so many scenes. The decorations and actors change quickly, a bit randomly - in fact it takes a while before this movie finds its tempo and footing. Something weighty happens and no reflection is allowed even in briefest sketch of a reaction. Next scene. Next scene-

- Poe, Finn, Rose and two new female characters were absolutely robbed. Both by the ungodly pace of this movie (there is much potential for scenes that could mean much much more in the whole storyline. As is, they are discarded as soon as they happen). The bond between Finn and Poe got severed in the beginning with some awkward finnrey moments and strange jealousy (was that what it was???) from Poe. I say either carry out the finnrey thread (which was also beautiful actually, though Finn deserves so much better than how she treats him in TROS...) or finnpoe, something which JJ himself built up. Rose should be given an independent arc with no romance involved, or a love interest of her own.

- Rose's infatuation with Finn is never touched. Rose herself is absolutely erased - she is a statist, providing some dialogue with absolutely no weight behind it. JJ treated her terribly - it was his privilege and responsibility to utilize whatever he got from Johnson as he saw fit; but throwing away her potential only underlines the racist sidelining he did to all characters of colour.

- the heteronormativity I can't understand - Finn and Poe are JJs babies after all (and yeah, I know - shareholders...). Why tease hetero relationships for both and STILL leave even them hanging?? Like, he discarded Rose bc first of all racism, second - Johnson's 'leftovers' I guess? Unacceptable. The lady of Poe's was sketched boldly - but still sketched. Her inclusion wouldn't feel so random if Poe wasn't shown to be this randomly emotional abt her all of a sudden. Why now? It felt a bit forced and this is a shame bc she (and Janah, omg Janah...) is super cool. I'd love to read and see way more about all of them.

- Finn and Janah - wonderful rapport, so much empathy and loyalty, they are wonderful together. I definitely could see them together as well - so many threads to explore! There was so much potential to embed meaningful relationships for Finn into the plot. Janah is one of those that felt quite right but deserved more still. She deserves a story of her own. Not for the first time it is a secondary character of colour who carries so much potential and substance and gets sidelined. I dont mind Kylo content btw - but this series was shown to concentrate on 3 people and a villain. Keep to this proportion or perish I say. They didnt keep them and the movie feels unfairly skewed towards the force dyad of Rey and Ren. Hence, robbed. We were robbed of much of quality content here.

- the implication/suggestion that Finn may be Force sensitive held so much promise. I love Finn and Boyega played him with so much passion and dignity. He grew into leadership without pretense or drama, was competent and knowledgeable about the inner workings of the Fleet and found hope he was struggling for. Honestly the problem here is that his prominence was teased to be greater than the actual time and the weight of scenes he was given. This movie should be longer, scene order less abrupt and random - so the characters that were shown to matter in the first part could matter here as well.

- JEDI FINN please. The potential of it was teased - they should scrap some of the scenes and build those kinds of plot points more thoroughly. Finn's arc should be more - but that doesn't mean Boyega played it any other than magnificently. He got what he was given and made it his. I hate that this still means it was not as much as he and Poe deserved it. Same with Rose.

- galactic generals (*husbands) Poe and Finn. It could be marriage, it should be - Isaac played a man in love. I enjoyed this new romantic angle with the spice smuggler lady as well - but it required more buildup. As it was, it made for an awkward and frankly homophobic ersatz for finnpoe plotline of the first and even second movie. I hate wasting the potential of new characters in the movie, and this is what happened here. Also Poe's smuggling past - no previous setup that felt offensive to many bc of its randomness and no previous grounds in existing media. Felt like unnecessary sensationalism here.

- Rey is complicated here. I didnt like her attitude towards Finn and wished for more appreciation of their own idiosyncracies between them. Finn deserved his love (whether romantic or platonic) to be recognized. It was lacking here.

- I loved the fight scenes, the dialogues with Ren that should begin in TFA if they wished for the romance to be acceptably wet up. Driver is so fucking physical and huge, a bit awkward and very strong. To me it was attractive - but to me Kylo always lacked the threat in him when it came to Rey; I know this isnt so for others and respect that.

- Choreography is super effective here, the body work of Rey and Ren is wonderful.

- lighting, the sith locations were one of my favourites

- the creatures - while in the background, theybwere lovely. They made for lusher world out there.

- Palps was eh. Needed for the ending setup, ultimately fell a bit flat. The twist re his endgame would feel better if the whole scene didnt play this fucking quickly.

- the death (you know whose...) is quick and abrupt, passing fleetingly with no real depth or importance. They are rushing to another scene so quickly they forget that if you love somebody enough to accept them fully, this person's death tends to leave some kind of impression. As it is, Rey is hardly the first character robbed of emotional engagement in TROS.

- sigh. Ren. I love to hate him and hate to enjoy him still. Also feeling like a hypocrite bc would I enjoy him if not for my prefernce for how Driver looks like? Would anyone who I respect a bit more than his most fanatical reylo fans? I have no answer really.

I've never seen a character ripped into shreds from so many angles. For incels and dudebros he is a pussy (a lot of girls I know also mentioned that). He is supposedly not cruel enough, not awesome like Vader, whatever.

For others he is a genocidal criminal, and that he is. You can't sidestep Tuanul or his passivity in front of Star Destroyer wiping out whole planets. He is implicated in this genocide - and that scene where he is supposedly mutely watching it from the distance falls flat if its intention was to show he wasn't entirely behind Hux's agenda. He still never stopped him. So yeah, it is obvious that for many he is absolutely undeserving of any empathy, much less a romance plotline with movie's heroine. Especially when the first scenes setting it up were so messed up.

Now I hate the word reylo and I'd rather choke than call myself that. But I did enjoy their enmity and idk love?? towards each other? It should be plotted more consequently and I believe if JJ didn't muck it in tfa people would be a lot less opposed to the whole villain x heroine thing. Nobody opposes it bc of that - it's the torture bed and it's the "whatever I want" line that made so many recoil. It's the absolute lack of coherence at a time where more self awareness was needed from the director of the very first part in the series.

I believe there is a kind of generational divide on topic of their romance. Youve got gen z "antis" who argue about the abuse (and have a lot of good point more reylos should think hard and long about) - and mostly adult to older women (this includes older milennials also!) who grew up steeped in gothic romanticism that, up to gen z growing up, was a dominant romance paradigm in the West.

Youve got your Wuthering Hills, your Pride and Prejudice and Beauty and the Beast. I hate it. I absolutely abhor it, and the more the reylo fandom hammered their whole relationship from this angle, the more I was distancing myself. I believe the whole genre is steeped in toxic masculinity and yes, you can look at reylo from this angle as well - and I understand that when you saw those scenes from TFA, and didn't feel convinced by entirely paradoxal romance teasers (bc JJ mixed them both in equal measure, and thus killed wide enthusiasm for reylo for good) then what happened in TLJ and TROS must look like the embracing toxic hetero romance in entirety. And to some degree it is - entirely by JJs fault. The other elements that you mightve ignored in tfa suddenly get amplified in tlj, in tros and youre left wondering why the hell Kylo Ren could ever be seen as romanceable?

But the thing is, while the analogy of angry white male pursuing a pure young woman seems fitting, it doesnt work for me here. I also acknowledge that it may be in part bc I'm used to the gothic paradigm, attracted to Driver as Ren and feeling safe and assured that Rey would stay herself despite whatever he wanted from her (and she did in my opinion, she never caved even when she loved him). Kylo is white, and he is aggressive - he is a villain, he tortures and hurts Poe and Finn and plays psychological games with Rey, he shouts a lot and is very physical, which in itself looks threatening.

All those could end up somewhat accepted bc he is a villain - people will accept the consequent villain, or paradoxical one done with self- awareness on side of their creator. JJ was absolutely unaware of what a mess he did I bet - the worst elements that crossed "reylo" off the list for so many people I'd argue were first sown by JJ himself in paradoxical chase of I tease this-now I don't. Here's what I mean.

It was JJ who put Rey on that horizontal torture bed, even when Poe's was upright. It was JJ who had Ren say those gross words abt taking what he wanted. It was also JJ who irreaponsibly and paradoxically played with symbolism normally reserved for gothic princes DESPITE the gross elements he himself planted - the mask going off to reveal a goofy Disney prince, the crouching so as not to scare her, the freaking bridal carry, the humanizing via showing Ren's vulnerability. I actually hated some of those scenes - I loved the face reveal no lie, but what followed was unacceptable. Why style your villain this lush and vulnerable when you're shooting your own foot a few minutes after, with dialogue that had whole groups of young women discard him as trash? Why not polish your villain with more self awareness so that the ground for the romance is understood and cautiously accapted?

So youve got an internally cracked TFA that for some was obviously teasing reylo but for others made it unacceptable forever. This is one hell of a difficult mix to continue with and I believe if JJ was given the 2nd part to work with, perhaps he might be able to somehow work with Ren so that TLJ wouldnt feel like slap to the face to those who saw mostly the worst parts of Ren that JJ himself designed. Perhaps he would also polish the romance teasers or got rid of them altogether, idk. TROS shows that while he was eager to discard anything that Johnson had put into motion, he chose to leave reylo content still. This is really paradoxical to me, today as it was back then.

Now reylo isnt super mainstream - if he got rid of it, it would surely anger a lot of people but also satisfy an equal amount of others. Yet he chose not to and I'd argue it is because he planned for reylo to happen from the beginning, just in a shitty way we first witnessed in the worst scenes of TFA.

I'll also argue another point - if Johnson was given the saga from the beginning, reylo wouldnt be nearly as much hated and regarded as abusive for so many. It is this particular humanization of Kylo that was criticized by so many that would protect the 1st part from that torture bed, and from taking whatever Kylo wanted. As it was, when all this sudden humanity followed JJs paradoxical mess, only opposition could come bc it kind of must - it looked for many as woobifying somebody who was already irredeemable. The irony is that JJ probably never planned for this - maybe he thought he could pull this off, somehow work out the agreement between ugly Kylo and Kylo worthy of Rey. Johnson just put a fat line between TFA and his own vision, and irresponsibly ignored all the ugly heritage that should be better worked on if he ever hoped to rectify JJs paradoxes. He didnt do this and thus the mess.

I dont know if it would ever be possible though. Perhaps theres been a shift in ethics, in aesthetics even, so big that for the gen Z this kind of relationship is unacceptable. I dont see anything bad in this - even if I enjoyed a lot of reylo's potential, there will be better content, better romances done by those kids who despise reylo now as well. Meanwhile I plan to stay on this weird pole stuck deep into my ass between reylo enthusiast and haters bc I cant for shit choose a side fully.

Bc I dont see the abuse this clear cut - but am also unsure how much of it is my cultural baggage, the history of normalizing toxic masculinity etc. I bet it's both to some degree, like with all gothic romance genre, - and that there wouldnt be this whole rift at the heart of tfa without toxic masculinity normalization at all. Without it there would be no torture bed and no threats. And the irony is that Johnson would probably see to that better. But not as good as a woman behind the camera to begin with - if you want a heroine at its heart that is.

Like, you can see JJs initial vision as pretty homogenous - the bed, the words, and ignore all the paradoxical romance symbolism in there. You can also look at it as fractured and absolutely lacking coherence, and fish for the elements youd like to stay in next parts. I welcomed Johnson bc he took the best in Kylo and left JJs mess behind. This is also the very reason youre gonna hate the TLJ if TFA felt coherent for you. Bc you cant ignore that which felt threatening and cruel and very much obvious.

I have no easy recipe at dealing with this saga. I cant throw my weight behind reylo fully, ever, but will cautiously accept the potential it could have should it be more coherently written. I love so much of art and those fics that are in line with my wishes towards how Ren should be done from.the beginning.

When I was considering what to.think abt all that, back in the beginning, I didnt want for Rey to cater to emotional demands and baggage of an aggressive male, and I believe she actually doesnt - time and time again she asserts herself, maybe messily but she has the right to her anger and pain so the messy it has to be. She is shown to hope for him becoming better - and isnt manipulated or groomed to do so, and if loneliness was the only reason to stick to him then any other person would suffice, which isnt the case. She is loyal to the cause to the end and happily carries on despite Ren dying, even if it's clear she loved him. She is her own woman and the magnitude of his emotions, the physicality of his behaviour hardly influence her - she neither cowers before Kylo nor caters to him, ever. I love her for this, actually.

So there you have it, my messy thoughts on both TROS and 'reylo' dynamics. I cant say Im satisfied with both. There could be more, Ren could be fleshed out better in the beginning. The potential of so many characters was left undeveloped. I dont feel satiafaction even with elements I loved abt reylo bc there is no counterpart in other aspects I hoped to see developed. I wanted Rey to have more time with Finn, for Finn to have more time with Poe, for Rose to matter in tros as well. I wanted more of Rey and Leia, and for Ren to have more coherence to his character. Ultimately I got crumbs and some bits unable to be stomached.

Go and watch tros, stay in the place of engaging with this series that feels best to you, closest to your needs abd perceptions. Tros will not satisfy anyone in full, also bc of editing and the pacing - which is terrible. Reylo will either frustrate you or frustrate you for entirely different reasons. Dont take JJs shit, dont take Johnson's. Take from the saga whatever works for you.

I dont think it's possible to fully embrace reylo, without reservations. There are grounds for the so called antis to point out the toxic masculinity and potential for abuse. There are tropes suggesting romance despite this still, all in just TFA. It was a mess from the very beginning and it's normal people took sides.

I'm just glad it's finally over.

#tros spoilers #sw spoilers #return of jedi spoilers #reylo

[indulgnces]

hi howdy hello!! i go by jess and this is my first time playing my sweet bb girl, so i’m pumped! more about my girl audrey below the cut!

❛  ( SARAH JEFFERY )  ◈  dude, shut up ! AUDREY ROSE from DESCENDANTS is on screen. their fans swear they’re just DETERMINED & OUTGOING, but we’ve all seen their JEALOUS & STUBBORN side ! according to TRUMAN WIKIA, they’re TWENTY-ONE years old, BISEXUAL, & identify as CISFEMALE ( SHE/HER ). they’re currently a STUDENT & are RELIEVED about life in truman. luckily they have HER DIARY & HER SONGBIRD NECKLACE with them & can visit THE FAIRY COTTAGE whenever they want. penned by JESS.

sooooooooo confession: i’ve never watched a descendants movie from start to finish 😬 I know! crazy considering I’m playing a character from the movies, but like, have you guys ever seen a character and just be like wOW, that is My Type of character? cause that’s what happened with audrey. descendants 3 came out and was trending, and I checked the tag and like was 👀👀👀 to audrey to the point that I watched queen of mean and got HOOKED. caught a replay of the movie and watched all the audrey parts while skipping over the rest. since then I’ve been in love with my girl and she’s been on my mind so much that I’m returning to rp after a small break to play my girl. In preparation I skimmed through descendants 1 & 3, and adurey’s youtube short story so I’m good to GO. 

CANON LIFE

“A lifetime of plans, gone. Our family status, gone. Audrey, you were supposed to be his Queen, and you let him slip through your fingers. Your mother could hold onto a prince in her sleep.” 

daughter of sleeping beauty and prince phillip, princess audrey has been groomed since she was a child by her grandmother to become the queen of auradon. she’d been friends with prince ben since she was a child, and was expected to marry him when she got older.

grew up used to the finer things of life, and as such, audrey was a bit self-absorbed and spoiled. became the most popular girl in school due to her status and beauty. was cheer captain. finally became romantically involved with ben at some point in high school. life was going exactly as planned. 

then ben decided to invite 4 villain kids (vks) from the isle of the lost to auradon, and everything went to shit. the stark black and white, good vs. evil mentality was deeply ingrained in audrey’s psyche, so she was very much AGAINST the idea of any isle kids coming over. convinced the vks were up to no good, she never warmed up to the them, and bullied them (mostly mal) at times. and you know what? she was RIGHT

mal used a love potion to steal her boyfriend, who then humiliated audrey by serenading mal during a tourney match, where audrey was cheering at. no one gave two shits though?? or suspected foul play at all?? they just cheered and were like “ah, cool! our soon-to-be-king has suddenly declared his love for this new vk who’s only been here for a few days! how awesome and totally natural !! “

audrey was still plenty popular by the end of the movie, but her fairy godmothers decided to treat adurey to a spa trip, which turned into an extended trip that required her needing summer school bc she missed so much school (aka why she was absent for descendants 2)

by the time audrey came back in descendants 3, everyone was ALL up mal’s ass crack. ben proposed to mal in front of everyone, serenading her with the SAME song he did in the first movie when he ceremoniously proclaimed his love for mal while simultaneously dumping audrey, and everyone cheered AGAIN for their union. damn thing broke audrey’s whole ass heart. on top of that, her grandmother chastised audrey for her failures in securing ben and basically failing the family. 

she also lost her status come d3??? like, at the end of d1, she was still cool as fuck. but come d3 girl is not even being invited to her friend’s birthday parties anymore?? she has no friends?? no one gives two shits about how she must be dealing with everything? and wow does that not help things at all.

that night, in her loneliness and anger, audrey decided to steal the queen’s crown from the artifacts museum. it was a petty thing. she was hurt, and just did NOT want to see the crown she’d envisioned as her own for all her life be placed on mal’s head. she didn’t have a goal beyond taking the crown. however, when she went to the museum, maleficent’s scepter sensed audrey’s emotions and desires for revenge, and revealed itself to her. it’s glow lured audrey to it, fed into her emotions, and bing bang boom, audrey became the ultra fabulous QUEEN OF MEAN 

under the scepter's influence, she put half of auradon under a sleeping spell, the other half she turned to stone, then she made ben a beast after he rejected her, and made mal an ugly old hag. she was foiled at the end by mal, and ended up falling under a sleeping curse as a result. with no True Love’s Kiss to awaken her (rip), the heroes ended up getting Hades to use his magic to wake her up.

at the end, she apologizes for her crimes & her emotions were finally acknowledged when mal and ben stepped up and apologized for their inconsiderate past actions to audrey (wELL, they never actually apologize?? they say ‘I owe you an apology” but both don’t like actually say sorry, and that’s 100% something audrey has noticed for sure). she celebrates at the end with everyone else when the barrier is brought down and is last seen dancing with harry hook 

POST CANON

totally headcanon that she’s still not 100% happy as she’s shown in the end while dancing around okay

she’s STILL lonely!! she STILL wants those apologies!! she’s STILL lost about what to do with her future now that her whole life plan has blown up in smokes. she’s HURT okay. her friends? abandoned her! ben? abandoned her! that one hurts the most bc after spotting that pic of audrey/ben as children together, I 100% hc that they have been best buds for years before falling into a relationship. and while it’s clear ben was not really ~in love~ with audrey ( i image they ended up getting together bc it was just Expected yknow?), audrey still had feelings for ben. even if it wasn’t true love (she def wasn’t In Love tho she thought she was), she did still love ben. he was her best friend, and the fact that he never came around to apologize to her for humiliating her the way he did after the love spell broke HURT. 

also hc that she had to take a remedial goodness class following her stunt 

the ending given to her is life a brief showing of her and harry hook smiling at each other all soft like before dancing, which like, i’m game for, but in terms of her actual future, audrey was trying to figure out just how to do life moving forward following everything

TRUMAN

“Tell me it was all a bad dream.”

yeah so I said audrey was relieved about her life in truman? 100000% true!

her life was incredibly sad and lonely before, so convincing her that all that shit was all just a bad dream was an incredibly easy thing to do for the descendants actors okay (im sad for her bc of this tbh)

her life as she knows it: she still comes from a family of high status and money. not technically a princess, but she sure does act like one. believes she was born and raised in truman, but was sent to boarding school at auradon prep since she was a child, where she thrived and grew into a typical Popular Girl (head of cheer team/one of the most beautiful girls), before returning to truman after graduating. basically she believes she had the same perfect life she had before in canon, minus the vks, ben, and the whole fairy tale/royalty stuff (basically everything that ruined that perfect life).

all that other extra stuff, including going all queen of mean and losing ben and being drop kicked by literally everyone, is just POOF, fuzzy memories, bad vivid horror story nightmares! every now and then she’ll witness an engagement, or spot a serenade, and it’ll trigger an overwhelming sense of sadness, but for the most part, she’s content putting her life behind her. her new life is a much happier one. that could totally change once she starts encountering people from her past life again.

only really recognizes her family members as family members, and maybe recognizes some past auradon friends (maybe chad charming as her ex since he’s the only one who didn’t totally abandon her rip)

since “returning” to truman, she’s entered university on the island. she wasn’t sure where she was going with life, but she knew she’s always been really good at drawing and really good at event planning. so in uni, she decided to keep her artistic talents as a hobby and pursue a career in event planning. in pursuit of this, she’s a senior at college, majoring in hospitality management.

PERSONALITY

positive: determined, headstrong, outgoing, self-assured, polite, moral, dedicated 

negative: jealous, stubborn, demanding, bossy, petty, close-minded, seemingly mean (tho she doesn’t consider herself mean, okay? she just can come off as mean/rude)

CANON CONNECTIONS

ben & mal: need them both bc they are the ones who hurt her the most so i’d loooooove to play out these dynamics in truman!! they’d be the most Triggering faces for her 

jay & harry & chad & uma: underrated audrey ships i’d love to play out bc literally crumbs are given to the majority of these dynamics, and so I want to just...explore them?? three of these 4 are vks and 2 of those 3 are people audrey actively pursued in some sort of ~connection~ at the end of the movies when the Couples got together, and she did that even tho she is very Moral and has confusing feelings about vks, and i just wanna know more!! 

TRUMAN CONNECTIONS

yeah this is getting long, so I’m planning on posting a whole separate post in the truman plot tag for these wanted connections! 

and yeah! that’s everything on my girl! if you’ve made it this far, you’re the best my dudes!! I’m gonna be on mobile for a good portion of the day before coming on at night, but if you’d like to do any kind of plotting with my girl, just go ahead and hit that like button, and I’ll slide in y’alls dms! ♥

#truman:intro #♦ audrey rose — intro. #intro

[millennialzadr]

About Page!

Hello~! Thank you so much for visiting my blog! My name is Koya, I’m 25, I’m pansexual, my pronouns are she/her, and I’m a full time freelance artist! My main blog is @koyakyuuun, so I’ll be liking and following from there!

Below are some guidelines for those who are curious to know more about this blog and what to expect from it, as well as some general info and FAQs!

Content Guidelines!

The focus of this blog!

So this blog is a mish mash of a couple different themes, but above all it is an adult oriented Invader Zim fan blog!! I grew up with the show and and was a BIG fan during highschool, and after rediscovering it this year I have been DAZZLED and DELIGHTED by the fan content being produced today!! I have a deeply nostalgic yet completely new perspective on the show now that I’m in my 20s, so alongside of celebrating iz content and fan content in general, this blog will center around my niche fave: the iz cast + millennial culture! in other words, the characters depicted as if they lived in the real world and aged in real time! I loved and related to the characters as a kid, and I still love them dearly to this day, so to see people experiment with character interpretations and create adult versions of them means I can still relate to them even now, and even make my own versions! and as a queer neurodivergent millennial who loves niche culture, my favorite versions of the characters are queer neurodivergent millennials who love niche culture!! (and by niche culture I mean MEMES, AESTHETICS, BAD FASHION, GAY CULTURE, CRYPTID CULTURE, DARK CORNERS OF THE INTERNET, CREATIVELY WEIRD SELF EXPRESSION ETC!!)

And of course the other main theme which fits into the first: ZADR! while I don’t ship Zim and Dib as they’re canonically presented in the show, I DO adore the idea of the two growing up together, eventually becoming friends, and eventually falling in love. I’m a Big Gay and I love romance and lgbt content, and ZADR holds such a soft place in my heart 😭 I wrote a big post about why I love it so much which you can see here if you’re curious about my interpretation of the ship!

And now, some guidelines!!

Things I enjoy and will be posting/reblogging!

- general IZ content! because holy SHIT I love the show and ALL the content the fandom creates is awe inspiring and amazing!!!

- millennial culture/humor! I FUCKING LOVE IZ + 2019 POP CULTURE REFERENCES AND MEME CONTENT OKAY

- POSITIVE CONTENT! IZ is my comfort content and I deeply admire the positive impact the show has had on so many people. I also interpret Zim and Dib as having hard lives and mental problems but eventually recovering and finding happiness (and making each other happy!!). I do also love vent content and gritty/dark themes from an artistic standpoint (and of course comedic Depression™ memes) but I will be focusing much more on comforting and uplifting content!

- character development/relationships, fluff, comedy, domestic content, daily life, sci fi, conspiracy/cryptid content, fashion portraits and camp horror!! these are my favorite themes!!

- friendship, romance, and found family!! I adore the relationships between the characters and they ALL DESERVE LOVE!!!!! JHONEN CAN BITE MY ASS

- the IZ creators!! speaking of Jhonen LOL I LOVE seeing content about the creators themselves!! I genuinely have such affection and admiration for the wonderful people who brought and continue to bring the world of IZ to life, they are such amazing and inspiring human beings and I will be celebrating them alongside their creations!!

- IZ characters + aesthetics!! some of my MOST favorite IZ content depicts the characters being stylized with or sporting the fashion of vaporwave, goth, grunge, pastel, spacecore, cryptidcore, future funk, 90s disastercore and any and all things strange, niche, glittery and neon, and I FUCKING LOVE IT. GOD

- and lastly, I talk a fuck of a lot, as you can probably tell by this post lol. I’ll be screaming in the tags constantly and am liable to write the occasional super long text post! for those who are into that, I invite you to have discussions with me! and for those who aren’t, feel free to ignore them!

Things I will be staying away from!

- romantic content that depicts the characters as minors AKA underage zadr!! there will be no kid ships here! I’m an adult and only enjoy shipping adult versions of the characters! kid content will be either canon, wholesome, or friendship content! while I do find adult versions of the characters attractive since they have qualities I find attractive in real life, I see the adult versions as almost completely different people since they’re so far removed from the source content, and the love I feel for the canon kids is HIGHLY maternal and very nostalgia centric. this would probably be more clear if I didn’t lump the two types of content into the same blog, but I really do love both the adult fan interpreted IZ world and the canon IZ world in equal measure, just in different ways!

- content that fetishizes or ‘yaoi’-fies gay relationships! I am a queer person and I enjoy queer content made by queer people for queer people, you’re not gonna find any “B-BUT WE’RE BOTH BOYS!” shit here 😂

- content that depicts abuse between friends or partners!! while violence is an active theme in zim and dib’s canonical relationship, I very much dislike zadr content that depicts the two being aggressive or malicious towards each other while they’re supposedly in love. complex relationships are certainly interesting, but while toxic and abusive relationships are realistic, they’re not okay and should not be romanticized. I understand some people use that kind of content to cope, but for me it’s nothing but bad feelings. sparring and play fighting is fine and good, consensual violence could be interesting to explore, but hatred will stay separate from romance on this blog.

- discourse and long conversations about negative topics! I acknowledge the importance of discussing problems within the fandom, however I wish for this blog to be a positive and comforting place, since iz content in general is positive and comforting for me! there may be an occasional post that touches on real life negative topics but overall this will be kept to a minimum.

- explicit content!! while I DO both draw and consume nsfw adult zadr content, it will not be on this blog! since tumblr decided to be idiots and remove any way for minors and people who don’t wish to see nsfw content to hide it, this blog will remain pg-13. I will also not be providing any links to my other sites because of this (I am a nsfw artist and I sell porn commissions for a living, not trying to shove that in the faces of my minor, ace and sex repulsed followers, but by all means seek out my art if you DO wish to!). similarly, I will not be releasing my nsfw zadr art publicly anywhere, since aged up characters are controversial and my career, being online, could suffer if someone wanted to use that against me. HOWEVER, for fellow adult fans with extra cash who take a shine to my art, paid content could be a possibility in the future 👀

Interaction Guidelines!

Things I’m okay with!

- tagging my posts in any way you wish! kinning is fine! any ship interpretation is fine! any gender/orientation interpretation is fine! sharing your thoughts/opinions is fine!

- as long as you CREDIT me! using my art for icons/headers etc, drawing my iz designs, referencing my art, and reposting my art on other sites is all okay!

- asks or anons of any questions you might have about me or my content!

- asks or anons popping in to share thoughts, opinions and ideas! it’s always nice to hear from other fans!

- leaving comments in the tags/replies/reblogs of my posts makes me very happy!! tumblr is the only place I post my fanart and I love seeing what people think of it!

Things I’m not okay with!

- messages, reblogs, tags or asks that are blatantly rude or disrespectful! I really do not care what the subject or reason is, if you act like an asshole, I will not respond and will block you!

- asks or messages that say only ‘hi’ or ‘how are you?’ I have no problem with people trying to be friendly but I never have a single idea of how to reply to these kinds of messages, I’m so sorry 😂 please talk to me about fandom stuff though!!

- pressure to produce content! I like any other creator adore comments and compliments, but things like “DRAW MORE!!” “MORE ZADR!!” “WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO DRAW MORE!!” are not compliments!! it is in fact very off putting so please don’t do that! it will mess with my motivation! consider commissioning me if you want more content!

- if you are considering trying to be my friend, please be 20+!! I am not comfortable being friends with teens! nothing against my teen followers, I respect and appreciate you, but please understand I cannot relate to you on a personal level, and besides that, being friends with someone over 20 can be harmful and even dangerous for minors! I am an adult and only wish to have adult friends! please respect my wishes!

About my content!

So since what I like to draw is usually pretty different from the show, here are the basic headcanons for my interpretations of adult Zim and Dib~! Basically they’re queer 2019 millennials who are damaged but doing their best and enjoy niche interests and subcultures. Zim is the type who’s tough to handle but it’s worth it because he’s an amazing and colorful person underneath it all and only those he’s close to get to see that, and Dib is an eccentric but completely reliable, intelligent, passionate, and loyal friend whose company is a familiar comfort and a total safe space. They live together and are mutually beneficial allies to friends to lovers!

I HAVE A FIC, or at least an idea for one lol and when using my designs for the characters, my drawings will most likely be set in its context! Affectionately nicknamed the Soft AU, it’s centered around rest, recovery, affection, care and bonding… bc I’m SOFT OKAY 😂 You can read the full summary here, but here’s the gist!

A little over a decade after arriving on earth, Zim’s banishment is reinstated and as a result his entire base and all his equipment is confiscated, leaving him stranded on Earth with no way off the planet and in danger of being caught and killed by the humans. Dib offers him a deal that he’ll hide Zim instead of turning him in in exchange for letting him study Zim. They live together in Dib’s apartment and eventually get used to each other. Loneliness induced affection ensues. Hooray!!

And now for the boys themselves!

My Dib!

- 25, 6′2″, Mexican, cis boy, bisexual, bilingual

- is recovering from depression and anxiety and has ADD and insomnia, has had a nicotine addiction

- has a ton of ear piercings and a few facial piercings, as well as a few tattoos

- is still just as obsessive about his interests as he was as a kid, just with more curbed enthusiasm due to, yknow, depression. researching Zim however brings his enthusiasm back full force. he still sucks at taking care of himself when enthralled with his work but he’s getting there

- runs various blogs, forums, and youtube channels making content about cryptids and conspiracy theories, the ad revenue of which is his main source of income (he dislikes using his father’s money to support himself, but will dip into the family account occasionally)

- is very patient and can communicate and problem solve very well, and is skilled at handling various conflicts and mental issues

- still has his ‘I hate people’ attitude but is more open minded and understanding than he used to be, and more compassionate. he has difficulty trusting strangers but his friends and family are very important to him

- can be moody and dramatic but he’s a big sweetheart at his core

- being friends with Zim has made him more willing to enjoy acting like a huge dork and total weirdo, even in public

My Zim!

- young adult, 5′5″, androgynous presenting demi boy, panromantic demisexual

- has PTSD and anxiety, is recovering with help from Dib

- displays inhuman behavior such as hissing, growling, chirring, chirping, scratching/biting, screeching, territory guarding and dominance displays

- is a demi boy, meaning he identifies as mostly but not completely male, and is more nonbinary than cis, but he’s never given it too much thought because gender is stupid. he has little to no concept and zero regard for human gender roles

- is a SHIT who’s main entertainment is annoying Dib and ‘winning’ arguments, but Dib seems to get harder to piss off as time goes on, much to his confusion

- pitches a fit when he doesn’t agree with/doesn’t want to do something but can be swayed with rewards such as food, sweets, new clothes, video games etc

- rambunctious and high energy, he gets stir crazy often, but since he hates the city he and Dib often take car trips to more fun/nicer places outside the neighborhood

- moody and bratty with skewed logic but smart and more intuitive than he used to be, he’s more than a handful to deal with, but this also makes him the most entertaining person Dib knows

- after having the free time to discover the world of aesthetics, he becomes very much into clothes, make up, accessories etc (be they masculine or feminine) and enjoys making a hobby out of creating a unique self image using fashion (thus also subconsciously asserting his individuality)

- is much more dependent on Dib than he admits (or even realizes)

- his beliefs in nationalism, fascism and genocide are direct results of brainwashing and personality altering programs run by his PAK, and are not actually part of his core personality (these programs will be overridden and deleted eventually)

Side Note: I haven’t thought as far with the other characters but my Gaz and Tak are definitely lesbians 😂

And finally, my tag list!

#my art - things that I drew!

#my post - any post that I posted!

#asks - asks!

#text post - any text post longer than a couple lines!

#video - videos!

#audio - audios!

#canon - content from the show/comic/movie etc!

#creators - any content featuring the IZ cast or crew!

#memes - memes, shitposts, short comics, comedic posts etc!

#friends - friendship art between any characters!

#family - family bonding between the membranes/found family between any characters!

#ships - ship art between adult characters!

#suggestive - any content that could be considered sexual in nature!

#positive - fluff, friendship, wholesome content, uplifting content, characters being happy/cute/having fun etc!

#negative - angst, vent art, violence, mental illness, dark themes, characters fighting/being sad/getting hurt etc!

#kids - content depicting characters as kids/irkens as their canon designs!

#adults - content depicting characters as adults/irkens with noncanon designs!

#millennials - content depicting adult characters that includes any modern culture! (personal fave)

#aesthetic - highly stylized or surreal portraits centered around aesthetic themes!

ship tags!: zadr (zim and dib romance), tagr (tak and gaz romance), rapr (red and purple romance)

friendship tags!: zadf (zim and dib friendship), tagf (tak and gaz friendship), zatf (zim and tak friendship), tadf (tak and dib friendship), zagf (zim and gaz friendship), zag (zim and gir)

character tags!: zim, dib, gaz, tak, gir, red, purple, membrane, skoodge, gretchen, keef, spork, miyuki, recap kid, bg chars, ocs

#i wrote an about since this blog is growing FAST #and i intend on staying active for a long time!! #i'll be using all the new tags from now on! #about #faq #my post