#and the way most people get mad about this particular development is so fascinating to me

[lover-of-mine]

No, but this is definitely my most controversial opinion, but the whole thing with Buck and Eddie being the same age comes back to the fact that they are mirrors of each other. Down to the tattoos with mirrored placement, yes, but like, narratively speaking too. They've been running parallel to each other their whole lives and them being the same age makes that even more intense. Eddie had to grow up too fast and Buck didn't have to grow up at all. Eddie was forced to take care of more than he could and Buck was never allowed to care as much as he wanted. Both of them ran because their lives were overwhelming. Buck gives Eddie the tools to slow down for the first time in years while Eddie gives Buck something he's allowed to care about. They're two sides of the same coin. They complement each other. They're each other's missing piece. And that's so much better when they're the same age.

#'oh but that makes them boring :(' #can you give me a logical explanation as to why it makes them boring?????? #ugh #also i hate the old man joke. have been tapping out of fics about since forever. but they still work with just a few months? #'oh when i was your age' 'when? 2 months ago?' ' yeah you're old now' 'im 47 days older than you asshole' #like the 5 years thing NEVER made sense to me #and the way most people get mad about this particular development is so fascinating to me #anyway #controversial #911 #buddie thoughts #i still have thoughts but some of them dont need to be published

[enchantinglyjade]

Milk & Honey - Ch. 12

Austin!Elvis x Black!OC

Masterlist

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Summary: Pearl finds a new hobby and Honey isn’t having it

Warning: Racial issues, swearing

Note: Sorry it took so long, I had to deadass write 5 chapters ahead just to make sure the plot worked, so look forward to that I guess.

Song: Smile by Nat King Cole

Playlist

-

“Vickie, my life has been absolute hell this week.”

“Girl, what happened?”

Dad and I got on better speaking terms these past few days, went for walks in private parks, he’d bring me gifts, anything he could think to do to win over my affection. Things were still weird between us, we never talked about anything personal, but I appreciated his efforts. I finally got over myself and realized I couldn’t be mad at him for not coming to see me when he didn’t even know I existed. Though I wasn’t too fond of the idea of him with another woman or his spoiled brat of a daughter.

Luckily, they spent most of their nights in a motel. Unluckily, they spent their entire days at our house.

While Dad and I were getting to know each other, Pearl had developed quite the sudden fascination in my boyfriend. Living in a new town with new people and a new family left Pearl with an uneasy head and an unquenchable boredom. Instead of taking up a hobby or looking for a job or getting herself her OWN man like normal people would do, she decided to dedicate her time to making my new happiness an issue.

Apparently, while I was busy learning what having a father was like, she’d sneak behind my back to go see Elvis. I didn’t even know about it until Elvis brought it up to me about three days ago.

‘I brought George and Billy down to the drive in and met this girl there. Her name’s Pearl, just moved here. Bumped into her a few times this week actually. Said she’s lookin to get into music, wanted my advice. George and Billy seemed real fond of her too, nice girl.’ He told me.

I couldn’t believe her. Lookin to get into music, he says. I heard her getting ready in the bathroom one morning, she can’t sing for shit!

“A whole lotta bullshit.” I answer Vickie.

On the other side of the bar sits my man

and Pearl draped over his table.

“Hey.” Vickie calls over the music, nodding over to him. “Who's the white girl?”

“The bullshit.”

She tells him a joke.

He laughs.

Being the obnoxious gentleman he is, Elvis is too nice to push her away. At least that’s what I tell myself. Of course, I have no reason to feel in competition with her, I know he loves me, but she had no business being anywhere near this side of my life.

How did she even find Club Handy? She isn’t supposed to be here. She clearly didn’t belong in a place like this. Her white skin, pastel dress, and bright blonde hair sticking out like a sore thumb against the browns and smokey tans of the club. Hell, even Elvis blended in better than her and he’s almost always dressed in bright pink. How’d she even get in here? It took me weeks.

She doesn’t even listen to Rock & Roll!

“You know, I may have heard Sunbeam talkin about an opening at the end of the week if someone was looking for a spot.” Vickie offers, pretending to speak to no one in particular.

I shake my head, wiping a glass down. “Ah, I couldn’t. Had so much on my mind, I ain’t even been practicing.”

“Exactly why you should do it. Singing’ll help you focus on what really matters to you. You can’t just give up now after getting on WDIA. People round here have been askin about you, and there’s only so much time before they forget. Use it while you can.”

“They have?” I ask shyly.

She smiles as an answer.

I mirror this, looking down in thought. “I guess I will.”

She claps, “Oh! I’ll go tell him now!” then runs out the club, pushing past customers.

I laugh, apologizing to the people, before catching Elvis and Pearl in the corner of my eye. 

The two of them make their way over to me. “Hey, baby.” Elvis greets, kissing me on the cheek. “How’s everything over here?”

I clear my throat, “Oh, the usual. At least it’s almost over. Who’s the friend?”

He’s still oblivious to the fact that she’s my new half sister, though from the looks of it, she had no intentions of telling him either.

“This is Pearl. The one I was talkin about. She asked if I’d show her ‘round Beale.”

Of course she did.

“Are you going to do it…?” I ask hesitantly.

He excuses himself to her, pulling me over to the side a few feet away. “Baby, it ain’t nothin to worry about. I just feel bad is all. I ‘member what it was like bein the new kid in town. Wish I woulda had someone nice to show me the ropes. But I won’t do it ‘less you say it’s alright.”

Do I say no and risk looking jealous?

I raise my shoulders uncomfortably. “It is a bit strange, but I trust you.”

“You know I’d never do nothin to hurt you, Bumble.” He kisses me, before turning back to Pearl, who smiles a wicked smile. “Wait!” He snaps his fingers turning over to me once more. “Why don’t you come with us? You know parts of Beale Street better than I even do. We can show her together.”

When I tell you I robbed her of that smile. 

“That sounds wonderful.” She says through gritted teeth.

“Alright, I gotta run upstairs to tell King som’ real quick, but I’ll be right down. You’re gonna love it Pearl. Beale’s full of musical history.”

“Yay!” She exclaims with fake enthusiasm, instantly dropping her smile the second he turns his back to walk out the door.

I clear my throat, getting closer to her. “Hey, uh, Pearl. What the hell are you doing?” I guess both of us are dropping our sweet side now that no one’s looking.

She gasps, holding her face in shock. “Oh no, Honey. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. Is he YOUR boyfriend?”

I cross my arms with a sneer. “Yes, he is and I’d appreciate if you stopped tryna get so friendly with him.”

She puts on an exaggerated pout. “Aw. Go cry to Daddy about it. That’s what happens when you go after the biggest star in the country.”

“Why are you here?” I snap at her.

My attitude slips right off of her, having no real effect on her. “Your Mama told me you left your wallet at home and that I should drop it off to you at ‘the diner’, but I see you must’ve gotten fired. She heard the news?” She says, slipping me the wallet.

Maybe she was better at this than I thought. I snatch it from her, tucking it away in my apron.

“Honestly, it’s embarrassin you think I’m the only one that’s gotten friendly with Elvis. You shoulda seen what the other girls were doin at that drive in, you’d think of me as conservative.” She says, checking her nails.

Alright, that’s enough. I get eye level with her, threatening her with my gaze. “What game are you playing at, huh? What’s your problem?”

She straightens herself out, dropping her preppiness. “My problem is that you took my daddy. So, I’m takin your man from you.”

I scoff, genuinely laughing at the idea of her thinking she could win him over “And how the hell will you manage that?”

“Aw, Honey. It’ll be so easy.” She fixes her hair, as Elvis walks in.

I may have had faith in Elvis, but something in her voice and cocky attitude made a knot twist in my stomach.

“Y’all ready to go?”

Both of us sit in his Cadillac unenthused as we drive down the street. Luckily, the streets died down, so there was no one out to see us together. Still, I wanted this to be over as quickly as possible. On our way out I had to ask Vickie to cover for me. I sure as hell wasn’t about to finish my shift knowing this rat was out riding around town with my man.

I cross my arms, head fuming with annoyance as Elvis goes on and on about stories and landmarks.

“And this lil buildin right here is a place Honey and I once went to-”

Poor thing’s clueless. Normally, I love going driving with him and talking about the past, but right now I just wanted him to shut up and get this bitch out of his car.

“He shouldn’t even be with someone like you.” The devil herself says leaning over the seat to whisper in my ear.

“I think you should mind your damn business.” I could get put down like a dog speaking to a white woman that way, but ain’t nobody else gonna stand up to put her in her place.

“-Then we saw ‘ol B.B. do this one thing with a-” Elvis continues.

“Bet you’re the reason he’s been gettin in so much trouble recently. He needs him a nice, sweet southern belle to help shake all that colored business outta him.”

My lip curls in disgust. I can’t believe Elvis fell for this. “You’re right. Know where we can find him one?”

She sneers at my remark, sitting back in her seat. She crosses her arms, upset that I’m not letting her words get to me.

“-just like the neighbors back in Mississippi. You remember that, baby?” Elvis turns to me with a big smile, waiting for my answer.

“‘Course, I loved David and Kathy.” I chime in happily/

His smile widens even more before he turns around to the backseat. “Where’d you grow up, Pearl?”

She huffs, “Alabama. Grew up on my daddy’s plantation, until one day we found out he was hidin another whole family behind our backs.”

I roll my eyes, feeling her glare in the back of my neck. What a sob story.

“Well, damn. I’m sorry to hear that, Pearl.”

“I think Vickie’s getting me a time to perform on Friday.” I bud in.

Elvis pivots back to me with surprised eyes. I know what I just did was rude, but I’m in no mood to give this disrespectful princess an ounce of my sympathy. “That’s great, Bumble. I’m proud o’ ya.” He takes my hand, giving it a light squeeze. “I, uh, suppose I should bring you back now, Pearl. Where do you live?”

Our eyes widen. Is she gonna do it?

“Just drop me off at the end of the block. I can walk from here.” She quickly states.

Elvis puts his hand up. “Absolutely not. I insist.”

Baby, please stop being so nice and just let the rodent out before it infects the whole car.

“S’just around the corner. Can’t have Daddy seein me, you know?”

He stops the car at the block just like she said. “Alright, if you say so. You have a nice night.” He waves her off.

“Bye now!” She smiles, waving back…at Elvis only.

I glare her down as Elvis drives away. Good, let her walk.

Elvis stares down the street in thought. “She’s a nice girl. Good seein other folk like me be so comfortable and respectful around colored people. Need more people like that.”

I roll my eyes. “Yeah…” This is ridiculous. Fighting another woman for my own goddamn man. Is this how Elvis felt about Michael? This sucks.

He keeps one hand on the wheel while the other reaches for my hand again. “Glad it’s just you and me now though. Wanted to bring you out on another date if you got the time.”

I smile, allowing all thoughts of Pearl to fly out the window as they should. “I always have time for you.”

For the past three days, any time Elvis and I went in public together we ran the risk of running into fans reporters, who always managed to be nearby spying. Though, I guess it was for the best that we weren’t seen on the streets together, it was still annoying. Now with Pearl trying to interfere, things just felt so stressful.

So, we went to a place neither would dare follow us; colored night at the Memphis Fairgrounds.

Of course, we were seen together, he had a few run ins with fans. “Oh no, no performin’ for me. Just here to have a lil fun tonight, that’s all.”

But even if one of them wanted to run off and tell everybody, they knew not a single newspaper would listen to a damn thing they had to say cause of their color. So, it remained a secret.

“Bought you a sno cone, Bumble.”

The colored women were shocked, and dare I say, hopeful when they saw us together. Of course, some were jealous, but they had this look in their eyes, like the same optimism for the future I get when I see Elvis. We gave others hope together.

He eyes me slurping down the ice treat while we hide behind one of the stands from a passing cop.

“Let me get a taste of that.”

“No!”

Maybe one day we’ll inspire change in the world, help make it a better place. I don’t want to be in hiding anymore. I want to grow old with him, get a house together, maybe even have kids. 

Who am I kidding, I’d love to have kids with him. We’d raise little superstars together. I’d be his wife, he’d be my husband. But maybe my head was in clouds that were just too high.

“I never did well with heights.” I hesitate out, gripping tightly onto the metal bar.

He puts his arms around me. “Don’t worry. I gotchu.”

I cuddle into his arm, trying my best to not look down from the top of the ferris wheel.

“I’m gonna take you flyin one day.” He says matter of factly.

“Like hell you will. I ain’t getting on no plane.” I exclaim.

He laughs, bringing me to sit in his lap, rubbing up and down my thigh. 

Dreams seemed so far away from where we are now. I know it takes baby steps, but looking into a future where we can safely be together, well, I understand why so little have attempted it. I’m shocked Mama did it all them years ago, I’m scared to do it now and it’s almost 1960. I couldn’t imagine the fear she had in the 30’s. Wonder what my dad thought about everything. If he really loved her, if he ever thought about having kids with her.

Elvis watches me patiently as I zone out.  “What on your mind, Bumble?”

I look into space, running my fingers along his neck while I think about everything that’s been happening. ”Don’t say anything bout my dad to anyone. I don’t know if he wants people knowin I’m his.”

He hugs me from behind, resting his chin on my shoulder. “I ain’t gonna tell nobody nothing, cause you ain’t his, you’re mine.”

It amazed me Pearl actually thought she had a chance with him. All the history and hardship we’ve been through together, nothing could take that from us.

Later that night I found myself back in my prison of a home. My once happy and lovey dovey mood replaced with a sickening attitude seeing Pearl at the table, no sign of Ma or Dad around. Still on a high from Elvis’ words tonight, I poke my fun at her. “Look who made it home. News said it was gonna be chilly tonight. Did you ‘member a jacket?” I say, hanging my own coat, on the rack near the door.

“Shut up.” She snaps, popping a grape into her mouth.

I walk past her into the kitchen, scanning through the fridge for a drink. “You know, walking alone can be real dangerous this time o’ night. ‘Specially with all that rising crime. Wouldn’t want any of that ‘colored business’ gettin ya.” I hiss at her, taking a sip of cola.

“Watch the way you’re talkin to me, ‘Bumble’.” She spits out the last word, continuing to eat her grapes, not bothering to look at me any longer.

I roll my eyes. I was about to ask her where Ma and Dad were, but I wanted nothing more to do with her. I’ll figure it out myself.

Just then, I hear the faint sound of Nat King Cole. What the hell? Are the neighbors playing that?

Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though it's breaking

I follow the music until I get to our back door. Peeking out the window, I find the answer to my question. Out in the back yard I see my parents.

Dancing.

Mom looks hesitant, but she can’t help but smile.

I lift the window ever so gently and lightly, listening to them speak.

When there are clouds in the sky

You'll get by

If you smile through your fear and sorrow

“Charles, I ain’t danced in years. I ain’t as smooth as I used to be.”

“Loretta, you’re smoother than a Nestles bar.”

Okay, ew, but cute, I guess. 

She smiles at him, closing her eyes and placing her head on his chest. He leans down, resting his head atop hers while they sway back and forth to the music.

Maybe he did really love her.

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You'll see the sun come shining through for you

I saw Elvis and I just then, dancing and swaying together though the world was against us, too lost in each other to care. We may have given others hope at the fair tonight, but seeing Ma and Dad just now, I couldn’t help but feel fear creep into my heart. If only life could be so simple.

.

.

.

- Taglist -

@tearupmyhead @chouetteschaussettes @il-giardino @theliterarybeldam @re3kin @anangelwhodidntfall @felicityroth @crash-and-cure @mama-pankow @tzillas @wonderlandlovelove @mirandastuckinthe80s @queenslandlover-93 @coconutessential @pumkiinpasties @buckybarnesbitch00000000 @biafbunny @darkestbeforethedawn16 @dollfaceyourfear @adoreyouusugar @hails-schae @spacegh0ul @im-lame-irl @sargspiderbarnes @whisperily

#austin butler #austin butler imagine #austin butler x reader #Austin butler!elvis #elvis presley #Elvis #Elvis Movie #Elvis biopic #elvis fanfic #Black Writers #black reader #black fanfiction #austin butler x black reader #elvis x black reader #Milk & Honey #enchantinglyjade #OC #POC #oc fanfiction #poc reader

[utilitycaster]

Sorry to keep the string of im*dna questions in your ask box, but I've been wondering, in your opinion are laura and marisha having their relationship be this... offputting on purpose, and we will get to a point where they develop out of it, or are they trying to write their relationship as cute/romantic (and it's not coming out well)? I always thought it was an unhealthy dynamic on purpose, but after how fast they resolved the gnarlrock fight I wonder when they're going to sort their stuff out, if they're planning on it at all. I know I'm not too good at picking up subtext but the fact most of the fandom seems to think they're just cute girlfriends leaves me very confused on the whole situation, I'd appreciate hearing your perspective.

Hi anon!

I don't know what Marisha and Laura's intent is, but I have to assume they're aware to an extent of how this relationship comes off (ie, incredibly unhealthy). I think anything else diminishes their skill as actors, their intelligence as people, and feels outright incorrect based on what we've seen and heard from them in the past. Their answers during talkback and a few in-game moments across campaigns have led me to believe that in general, the cast in general, and Marisha and Laura in particular, have a good sense of how to portray relationships in a thoughtful, nuanced way. Which, you know, for a group of voice actors, some of whom also direct or write, is a pretty crucial skill! So anyway, I believe that their choices have been intentional.

I can only speculate as to why the fandom thinks they're just cute girlfriends, and will put it under a cut.

Again, speculation, but: people have been shipping this since quite literally the minute the two appeared on screen as characters who knew each other. As for why, I suspect it's one of the following: some are genuinely interested in the potential or the characters and aren't as attuned to how toxic this is. Some would like an F/F ship no matter what and don't care about the characters or how toxic it is (although like...honestly if you're shipping this as horrible toxic codependence, more power to you, it's not my cup of tea, but it's fiction, you're valid, and you're also not saying Cute Girlfriends so this doesn't apply anyway). Some are weirdly obsessed with Marisha and Laura specifically playing lovers despite consistently playing Two Women Who Don't Get Each Other/Can't Be Honest With Each Other across three separate campaigns, which is how we got the "Beauyasha is For Straight People" nonsense.

It's been fascinating to track the bargaining going on in the Cute Girlfriends camp. It went from early campaign "they're girlfriends already!" to "oh they've been in love for a long time" to "they realized they loved each other during the gnarlrock incident" (itself a backtrack from how Imogen sucked for being mad at Laudna) to "I would give anything for them to talk" and then when they did talk, began rapidly backpedaling. The idea of this being anything but explicitly romantic love would have gotten you anon hate a few months ago, but the popularity of it as a QPR has suddenly spiked as of the last episode (which, honestly, is weird, because like, yes, people in a QPR don't necessarily kiss, but also, I would still expect someone in a QPR to tell their queerplatonic partner 'hey it is fucked up that you can't promise me you won't SIDE WITH MY MURDERER'. I mean. I would expect you to be able tell any friend of two years that.)

It's like they're trying to hang on to their first impression in the early episodes - why they cling to such minor characters as Zhudanna or this idea of a static hypothetical dream cottage where nothing happens - but canon keeps diverging more and more, and I wonder what will happen.

Anyway. I guess I leave you with this thought:

Imagine that Ashton had entertained siding with the god-killing cult in conversation with Laudna. Do you think the people who ship Imogen and Laudna would have tolerated that?

Imagine that Imogen had said "I know loneliness you don't" to Laudna. Do you think the people who ship Imogen and Laudna would be mad about it?

#answered #Anonymous #critical role spoilers

[patpran-kinnporsche]

KINN THEERAPANYAKUL, MY FAVORITE CHARACTER.

(Characther analysis or the character development of Kinn)

Kinn is one of the most overhated, unappracieted, understimated and misunderstood character of KinnPorsche but he’s my favorite character, I’m a proud Kinn defender and apologist so I felt the need to write this long post about this incredible character.

In the first episode Kinn is immediately presented as the ruthless mafia boss who killed a person firing a bullet into his head without thinking twice, who killed the men of the Italian boss and send them to him as ‘’gifts’’ and who was ready to kill Porsche if he hadn’t accepted to be his bodyguard. He seemed superb, he was cold and felt like he had power over other’s people life infact the first thing he said to Porsche when he started to work for him was ‘’Don’t forget that your life is mine’’.

In the second and in the third episodes we discover something else about Kinn, that he’s a caring person. He cares about his big brother a lot because when Porsche kills his carpes he tries to calm him by saying he will buy other fishes but he also cares about his bodyguards, in particular about Porsche, yes he often gets mad at him because he’s a troublemaker but he also saves him from the minor family, he does it in a brutal way but he does it because he’s so fascinated by him, by this man who is so different from him, so free, so carefree. He probably doesn’t understand why but he feels the need to protect him and he does it, in the third episode he saves him from the bullett, he also takes care of his wound. But in this episode we also discover another thing, he’s struggling, he feels trapped in a life he doesn’t want, he’s obliged to live this life, to kill people, to be ruthless but we also get to see a softer side of him… he feels so connected to Porsche and he’s so tender now with him so he kisses him and allows himself to feel something he hasn’t felt for a long time since he hasn’t kissed anyone in a long time.

At the beginning of the fourth episode we see a conflicted Kinn, he thinks that what he did ruined everything with Porsche so he talks to him immediately because he doesn’t want problems with him, he’s direct and I like this characteristic so much. In this episode we also see that he has developed strong feelings for Porsche and there’s no way back, he shows another side of him, he let everyone see how he’s when he starts to fall in love but unfortunately he does a mistake… even though he tries to control himself he has sex with Porsche who is drugged, willing, but still drugged.

We see, in ep 5, how this mistake torments him, he asks Porsche if he’s okay, he wants him to rest but he’s forced by his father to punish him… he doesn’t want to do it but he has to because he needs to remember something he was probably forgetting, he’s the mafia heir, there’s no room for weakness or love and even though he’s devastated and hurt just as Porsche is he has to do what he has to do and we see once again the cold Kinn that is even colder than episode 1 but he melts as soon as Pete tells him that Porsche has gone back home and when he goes to him he also follows Pete’s advise and tries to patient and calm with him because even if it doesn't seem like it he do cares about him, a lot.

In the ep 6 we finally see the real Kinn, the one that made me and Porsche fall in love with him. When he doesn’t have to follow the rules, when he’s not the Mafia heir, when he’s free…He smiles, he shows his inner child, he wants to know more about Porsche, he talks about his dream and we see once again how the weight of being a Mafia boss consumes him, exhausts him. We also see that he’s not heartless like he may seem on the contrary he has a big heart and he shows it when he apologize to Porsche, he beg him to forgive him, he set him free because he wants to see him happy and lastly he took a bullet for him.

In ep 7 and 8 we see the lover Kinn and we learn that despite everything he went trough he never lost his ability to love. In ep 7 we see the insicure,  jealous lover, vulnerable lover that cries after their moment of intimacy because of all the stress and the emotions. He’s so scared of losing Porsche that he doubts him but infact he never really doubts him because despite his trust issues he actually always trust Porsche, the one he doesn’t trust is Vegas. In ep 8 we see his sweet, loving, caring side, he’s a devoted lover that is ready to do anything for the one he loves.

After ep 9 everyone really hated Kinn for locking up Porsche but I was so sure he loved and trusted him, he had a plan and infact he showed that he was a smart, cunning boss and he just wanted to protect the man he loved.

In the episodes 10, 11, 13 and 14 we also can see that he’s an amazing boss that deeply cares about his people. In particular in ep 10, he’s destoyed by Big’s death, he starts smoking and drinks more and he feels so guilty for what happened to him. Also in ep 11 when Pete (Vegas) sends the messages about the vacation, he’s sceptical and so worried about him and when in ep 13 he return he’s so relieved and happy. Lastly in ep 14 when Pol is shot he protect him from other bullets and he does the same with Pete and then when he resigns, he looks so sad and broken because he’s losing the man he trusts the most.

Above all in the 11, 12, 13 and 14 episodes he showed how much he has changed, grown, he has became a better person, he demostrated to be the best boyfriend. Kinn went from being cold, from not trusting anyone, from not showing his emotions to be one of the most caring, sweet, kind, honest and loving person and character. He has apologized over and over again for his mistakes, went from saying that Porsche’s life was his to say that his life meant the world for him, from sleeping with a gun to sleeping peacely entrusting his life and heart to Porsche. I will always love Kinn, this profound, beautiful, amazing character.

And I will always be thankful to Mile for portraying him in the best way 💓.  

#meta #i love him so much #my favorite character forever #my beloved #my comfort character #kinn theerapanyakul #mile phakphum #kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #kinn anakinn

[darkspine10]

GF Fanfic - We Fought a Zoo

Dipper and Mabel Vs. The Past (34,006 words) by darkspine10

Chapters: 7/9

Fandom: Gravity Falls

Rating: Teen and Up

Zera was fighting to stay awake. Her wife had never learned how to teleport, and with her brother-in-law’s party taking the only car they were reduced to the horrors of public transport. They’d been lucky to squeeze past a throng into spare seats on the Muni bus heading into the city centre. Despite her tiredness, Zera found the connecting wires above the bus strangely fascinating - she’d never seen a vehicle restricted to one strict path side-by-side with free moving traffic before. Pressed in a line beside her father-in-law, she craned her neck like an eager child to catch a glimpse through bleary eyes.

Meanwhile Mabel grimaced at her father from across the way between strangers’ bodies rocking back and forth. In the packed bus it was all she could do to show she was sorry for the deceptions. He had his arms crossed and a neutral expression, which for him meant a resting gruffness much like his grandfather’s.

Mabel tried to ignore the unceasing gaze and plan for what lay ahead. Between them they had Journals 3, 6, and Stan and Ford’s combined tome, but Mabel wasn’t about to put her full trust in the books. Relying on the journal to find weaknesses in the heat of a fight was all well and good in theory, so Dipper assumed, but Mabel preferred a more practical approach. The journals had led to ruin as many times as success, and she lacked her brother’s unflinching reverence for knowledge for its own sake. No, she was readying to face the tulpa with sheer pluck and her own skills. Before leaving the house she’d equipped herself, strapping on her grapple gauntlet, the adapted invention she’d crafted from her old grappling hook. The black bracer was strapped to her left wrist. Beneath, in the adjacent launch tube, she’d loaded a multipurpose tranquiliser. It was enough to take down most possible threats.

Mabel wished she’d brought her motorbike, shaking in her seat as the bus turned a corner and made its way down another sloping street. Zera slid into Mr Pines’ side and held the nearby bar to stay upright in her seat. For his part, Mr Pines seemed vaguely uncomfortable at her touch - probably unnerved now he knew the woman next to him was not East Indian, but was in fact an ET with iridescent scales, tendrils rather than hair, and pale eyes like a shark’s. Still, Mabel mused, he was putting up with all this, so it wasn’t a total failure of first contact.

They were passing through the densest part of San Francisco, not far from where Errata had made his initial rampage. The people walking the streets seemed unperturbed, although the news had reported that the tulpa - resembling a horde of zombies at the time - had travelled in this direction. Maybe that was the reaction most people had to encountering the unknown, to bury their heads and forget in a collective effort to stay sane. It worked in Gravity Falls after all. She wondered what that meant for her family’s particular brand of relative madness, that they endeavoured to discover and chronicle every last shred of evidence of the paranormal.

“That’s where I work,” Mr Pines said awkwardly, pointing Zera’s eye towards one of the anonymous skyscrapers. It was obvious to her that he was faintly embarrassed. He was divided between his upset confusion at the events of the past day and his duties as a host to his daughter-in-law.

“As a… computer expert?” she offered, trying to open him up to conversation, though she had to yell somewhat in the cramped car. With the perception filter masking Zera’s alien features, Mabel could almost imagine this was a perfectly ordinary family outing.

“Yeah, I’m a back-end techie in a big software developer. You’d be surprised how satisfying editing lines of code to get rid of bugs can be.”

“Uh huh,” Zera said, and Mabel facepalmed. Her dad’s work was hardly the most thrilling to talk about. At least they were making an effort to get along.

The Muni led them through the Sunset District, an endless expanse of squat, square buildings, laid out in a gridlike pattern, then south, heading towards the coast. “I’m sad we didn’t stop in Haight-Ashbury,” Mabel yelled across the aisle, drawing annoyed looks from the other commuters.

“Probably best not to get high on a mission,” Zera said with a smile, though her father didn’t like the joke and merely deepened his scowl.

Finally they reached their stop and shuffled past the crowd to get off. They stood in a large parking lot leading to a boulevard of tended trees and shrubs that ended in a ticket office. Zera read a flag posted on a lamppost. “San Francisco Zoo. This is the place?” As far as the three of them could see there was no sign of panic. No people running or screaming. Families and kids lined up at the entrance to buy their tickets so they could gawk at the variety of exotic animals.

“You sure your construct thingy is here?” Mr Pines said doubtfully. He had Journal 6 open and was shaking his head at something in Dipper’s young-adult jottings.

“Gimme a sec.” Mabel pressed her palms together and closed her eyes. Her father looked at her quizzically while she concentrated for a few seconds. A gentle ripple flew out from her and raced across the zoo.

“Well, I’ll be-” Mr Pines was cut off when a rebounding wave passed over him and back to Mabel.

She opened her eyes and grinned. “Oh, it’s here alright.” She had used an aura detection spell, her and Zera’s alternative to Dipper’s technological solution. It had bounced off the tulpa’s mystical field like echolocation. “Can’t narrow it down though. Too many living things messing up the feed.”

“The zoo’s hardly small,” Zera said, peering at the ticket office and coming up with ways to avoid paying for three admissions. She kicked at the concrete. “That thing’s clever though, most cryptids won’t have a hard time blending in here. Without your brother’s tracker we’ll never find it. Like a needle in a haystack.”

“Do they have haystacks in space?” Mr Pines asked, genuinely curious.

Mabel slapped her forehead .”Ugh, I’m a dummy, before we left I should’ve…” She snapped her fingers. “Z, can you open another portal quickly?”

“Not really, transporting another person-“

“Not for me, just a little one,” she whispered her intent and put her palms together. “Pretty please? I’ll buy you a new fish tank for you to snack on when we get home?”

Zera relented and lifted her hands to enact the spell. She visibly strained with the effort, moaning as well, until a small hole opened up in the air, replacing a section of blue sky with floral wallpaper. A coiled rope tumbled out of the portal into Mabel’s arms. Zera dropped her hands and the portal closed with a pop.

“Thank you babe, you’re the best,” Mabel said. Zera, bent double, waved her off like it was nothing.

Mr Pines leant in to figure out Mabel’s plan and examine the rope. At least, he’d thought it was a rope. On closer inspection the rope writhed. “Holy Moses, is that Apep?”

“Yeppers!” Mabel said with a toothy grin. “She’s perfect!”

“Perfect? Are you a total mushuganah?! What good is that lazy reptile gonna be in a massive zoo?”

“She’s got homing instincts.” Both Mr Pines and Zera gave her looks of complete disbelief. “No, really. Apep may not seem like an active, go-getter snake, but she’s got this knack for sniffing out trouble.”

“Isn’t she also a total wimp who bolts at the first sign of risk to her fat, slimy body?” Zera pointed out. She tickled the snake’s chin. The animal wasn’t pleased to be roused from yet another nap today and coiled languorously around Mabel’s arms.

“We just need to give her something to sniff out, trust me.” Mabel held out Journal 3 in front of Apep’s nose. “C’mon girl, smell the scent of conspiracy and musty paper. The tulpas come from the journals, right? So they must have some things in common.”

Apep unexpectedly wriggled to the ground and slithered away. They heard a series of screams vanishing into the distance as she went. Mabel proudly put her hands on her hips and went towards the zoo. “Onwards, Aoshima!”

Zera shrugged at Mr Pines, as if to say, ‘ah, what the hell’, and followed Mabel. Mr Pines waited a moment, shook his head, then quickly walked to catch up with the girls. In the end they managed to achieve entry to the zoo using the flimsy excuse of being expert snake handlers, here to recapture a rare specimen. From the amount of unsettled visitors around the entrance, the ticket sellers were willing to believe the story.

The trio quickly became lost in the sights and sounds of the zoo. Lemurs and Monkeys swung on vines all around them. Across the savannah Zebras and Giraffes idly chewed on grass, while predators hungered greedily a short distance beyond. Each direction led to another great kingdom of animal life and it wasn’t hard to get overwhelmed by the sounds and smells of the rare animals. Despite the chaos of Apep’s release, as well as the possible lurking tulpa, the zoo remained calm, with people merrily going about their way, ignorant of any danger. Mabel had to send out another aura spell to try and pick up Apep’s trail.

Her father raised an eyebrow. “Wait, I thought there was too much biodiversity in here for that kind of magic mumbo jumbo?”

“It’s different with Apep,” Mabel patiently explained. “She’s like my familiar, I know her essence.”

“If you say so.” He shrugged, desiring nothing more than to be done with this adventure.

The spell’s trace led them to one of the smaller parts of the zoo, a white-brick building on the north side with a central circular window. It sat next to an anteater enclosure and a small ‘prehistoric garden’. Unknowingly, both twins’ parties ended up running into plastic dinosaurs that day. Mabel put on her glasses and examined a sign by the building her spell had bounced off of. “South American Tropical Rainforest and Aviary. Guess we found ‘tulpy’.”

She pushed the door open and the three of them tensed. Mabel made sure her gauntlet was ready for either grappling or darting, while Zera reluctantly whispered protection chants under her breath. She was already exhausted enough, let alone if she had to start making wards and firing offensive spells left and right. Mr Pines raised his fists in a weak show of defiance, but flinched on entering the humid greenhouse. A plumed basilisk lounging on a branch had spooked him with its wide-open eyes.

“That one’s just a regular animal, Dad,” Mabel teased. “Here Apep! Come to momma!” Against the walls of the room were rocky cliffs, and, above their heads, a large fallen tree trunk to add to the jungle-like atmosphere. So did the heat, making the two humans in the room instantly start to sweat.

“Over here.” Zera tiptoed over a low stone wall into a tropical oasis. Lying sunning among the pebbles was one very ‘pleased with herself’ snake. “Oh Apep, you useless desert noodle. Some hunting dog you turned out to be.”

“Aw, maybe she made a mistake.” Mabel said, kneeling on the wall. Apep didn’t resist, lying there waiting to be picked up again without a single thought behind her slitted eyes. Zera edged closer to her pet, pushing past a fern and trying to crouch down. A massive lizard hefted itself out of the foliage and Mabel cried out. “Woah, take it slow.”

“That’s a Komodo dragon!” Her father added, impressed by the size of the thing. The wrinkled creature was 10 feet across and dragging its bulk along the pebbled beach towards Zera. She froze in place, unsure what the best move would be.

“They’re venomous,” Mabel whispered, “back away and- wait a second.” She cocked her head to one side. “Komodo dragons aren’t from South America.”

“So, so what?” Mr Pines said frantically. “You can regale us with reptile trivia later.”

But Mabel had a point. Zera’s eyes widened as a curving sail crest unfurled itself on the back of the ‘dragon’. A small spark of noxious flame shot from the lizard’s nostrils. Zera swallowed and held her ground. She was inches from Apep but didn’t dare move a muscle closer. “Pyrosaur,” she stated. “Apep found our tulpa after all.”

“A juvenile, judging by the pint-size,” Mabel said. “They disappear in moonlight. Don’t suppose anyone thought to bring a full moon in their back pocket? No? Thought not.”

The tulpa-pyrosaur gave no warning as it leapt towards Zera, spewing fire in a spray ahead of itself. She dived for Apep then twirled to jump out of the way just as the fire singed her back. Steam rose from her skin, which had already been unreasonably dry. Zera rolled over, unable to stand and dropped Apep.

Mabel reflexively fired her grapple gauntlet - not aiming the tranquiliser at the pyrosaur, but sending a line to her partner. Zera feebly held on and let the cable drag her upright and out of range of the pyrosaur’s lunging teeth.

“Jehosophat!” Mr Pines cursed. He bundled Mabel towards the exit. Zera wobbled on her feet but managed to stay upright, while Apep serpentined out into daylight at a speed that outran all of them.

By now the tulpa had changed forms, going from a convincing reptilian to starkly technological. A floating cube launched itself past the group into the sky before dropping down towards a nearby exhibit. Mabel watched it descend and come down with a splash. She traced it and saw its destination was a new attraction at the zoo. “A Wonderland of Snow and Sea,” she intoned. “More Christmas theming.”

The area was decorated with large blue and white plastic approximating ice sheets. On rocky platforms around a meandering river sat polar bears on one island and a flock of emperor penguins on the other. Powerful air conditioners operating at full blast plummeted the temperature down. Mabel and her father soon forgot the sweat from the reptile house. Snow machines added a final touch of ambience, sprinkling them with fake paper chunks.

Supporting Zera on one arm, Mabel held a hand to block the sun glinting off the white plastic and scanned the new area. It must be a recent exhibition, full of transfers from zoos in colder climes. There wasn’t any trace of their wayward tulpa.

“No sign of it. Nothing. Bupkis.” Mr Pines had summed it up quite well. Mabel slumped down beside the riverbank and pursed her lips.

Only Zera’s spirits were lifted. “This is more like it. I’m going for a swim!” She pecked Mabel on the cheek, then ran towards the freezing water. Mr Pines watched amazed as she leapt in headfirst without even stopping to take her clothes off.

“She needs to rehydrate,” Mabel quietly explained. Apep slithered up next to her on the bank and stared into her eyes as if pleading to be sent back home through the same witchcraft that had whisked her out of comfort. Mabel stroked the animal, wishing she could provide for its wants. “You did good, girl,” she whispered, “sorry we blew your lead.”

Mr Pines looked around the enclosure and sat himself next to his daughter. “At least she did better than the blasted pig ever could.”

“Waddles is special too, in his own unique, piggy way.” Mabel pulled her legs in tight and slumped her head on her knees. “It’s not fair. You shouldn’t have to be thrown in the deep end like this.” Mr Pines realised she was talking about himself and the sudden discoveries he and his wife had made. “I didn’t get a chance to say it before, we were in such a rush to fix things. Dipper even had this whole ‘slow reveal’ plan with the journals.” Mabel placed Journal 3 on the shingle.

Mr Pines opened the book to a page near the back. Mabel’s own handwriting was scrawled on the page in pastel crayon, talking about unicorns and protective shield enchantments. The cartoonish doodles she’d drawn were a reminder of how very young his children had been when they started all of this. When they’d started lying. He sighed. “I know why Dipper lied. Boy’s the most anxious kid known to mankind. But why you, Mabel? Why didn’t you tell us sooner?”

“I wanted to,” she said, looking away and picking up handfuls of pebbles to slip through her fingers. “I wrote you a letter and everything during our first summer away. But we passed it off as my wacky imagination.” She threw away the rocks so they splashed in the river. “Then Dipper got talking about hiding the truth, and I was only supporting him at first. Eventually I got thinking that what he said made sense. I didn’t want to lose out on our amazing lives chasing monsters either, I mean, what teenager would! It got hidden the same way I hid all my boyfriends and girlfriends. I’ve always had trouble adjusting to change, especially when it’s in my hands to decide.” Her shoulders tensed. “Dad, do you or Mom know what I’ve been up to the past few years?”

“Oh, you mean the ‘activism’.” Mr Pines made quote marks with his fingers. “Sure, we know all about that?”

“But, like, how much do you know? I’ve not exactly been following the law 100% of the time.”

Mr Pines snorted. “Come on, you can say it. You’ve been a notorious criminal.” Mabel seemed surprised but he shook his head. “Heck May, it’s not like we could avoid seeing your name and face crop up on the news every few months. All those protests and strikes across the country, and there was our little girl, every time.”

“Trying to make the world a better place one step at a time. If you knew, why didn’t you bring it up before now?”

“And ruin the Christmas mood? We didn’t want to cause a scene.”

He seemed appalled by the idea and Mabel couldn’t help but laugh. “Man, our family is crap at direct communication.”

“Mabel!” he admonished. “That was certainly direct language.”

She was still grinning. “No, but it’s true. Stan and Ford, me’n Dipper, we can’t help but be stupid about talking to each other. We bury our real feelings until we fall apart. Maybe we should all stop caring so much about nebulous future consequences and live a little, you know?”

“Can I ask, what about Zera? Is she… like you?”

“What do you mean, Dad? Is she an expert knitter, does she like cute kittens, is she equally hot and sexy?”

He shoved her away playfully. “You know what I mean pumpkin. Does she go out of her way to help people and cause trouble with the police like you’re always getting up to?”

“Well, she does the latter. I’m working on the former; she’s very keen.” Mabel spied her wife swimming backstroke by a pair of bemused polar bears. “Zera’s been along for the ride on a lot of our recent adventures. I trust her fully with my life. Though not necessarily my wallet. Do you wanna know how we really met? Zera tried to scam me out of a giant crystal in Japan. She pretended to be the last of her kind.”

“And, that wasn’t true?”

“Heck no, far from it. All lies. But she cared about me, and we bonded, and now everything’s amazing. Maybe we can forget all the lying between us, too?” Mabel stared imploringly at her father.

He grinned. “Hey, I’m just sad how much I missed out on. You’ve been to space, saved the world, had all these insane things happen. Most of all I missed getting to walk my little girl down the aisle.” Mabel hugged him tight, burying her head in the crook of his neck. “I suppose this is all my fault, when you think about it.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I was the one who suggested that you and Dipper should spend a summer up north. I remembered all the fun I had in Gravity Falls - swimming in the lake, wandering the forest trails - and figured you’d get something out of it too. I thought it would be character building, sending you all alone and having you work for Uncle Stan like I did, with no technology to rely on.”

Mabel gave a small laugh. “You realise we had smartphones back then, dad?”

“Yeah yeah, I know, stardust. I thought the trip would be one big adventure. I guess I underestimated quite how big. I mean, it makes sense. My job is so boring, anything outside my comfort zone feels like a major step.”

“You’re not doing so bad so far,” Mabel said, pleased to have made some small way towards repairing their rift.

“Your mother might take longer to come around though. Mary doesn’t change her mind swiftly.”

“Nor does Dipper,” Mabel said, chuckling.

At that moment, Zera swam up to them. She rested her arms on the riverbank and flashed them a smile. “Well well, what exotic animals do we have here? Primates from the southwest USA if I’m not mistaken?” Her clothes, from her pullover vest to her plaid skirt and boots, were all soaking wet. Zera didn’t seem to mind. She was about to climb onto the bank when she suddenly jerked backwards.

Mabel shot to her feet as Zera felt another tug and splashed under the water. She emerged again, waving her arms and spluttering. Her perception filter flickered on and off, flashing between human and alien. With one hand she clung onto the beach. “My leg!” She closed her eyes and pulled with all her might but it was no use. She was dragged inexorably under the water.

“Can she breathe under there?” Mr Pines said, jumping to his feet and searching wildly for a life preserver.

“I’m not waiting to find out.” Mabel gulped in a breath of air and dived in after Zera. The water chilled her skin and the extra weight absorbed by her clothes began to weigh heavily. Zera was reaching for the surface and being continuously pulled down. The water was clear enough for Mabel to make out a long, slimy tentacle wrapped around one of her legs. She let out a stream of bubbles as she gasped in shock. An octopus-like mass resided on the riverbed. It had a golden sheen.

Pressed for time, Mabel aimed her wrist at the creature and flicked her wrist. The tranquiliser dart moved slowly through the water towards the lovecraftian abomination, striking lucky and causing the beast to flail its tentacles. Zera was freed from its grip but a stray tentacle hit her on the forehead. Stunned, she floated lifelessly in the murk. Mabel launched her grappling hook and tied it around Zera’s arms. She kicked out and broke the surface. Sucking in air, she slapped her arms in the water to swim towards the bank. She was grateful when her father pulled her, and Zera tangled in the cable, out onto dry land.

“Oh man, that’s not gonna do much for my headache,” Zera said wearily, rolling onto her back. “It was bad enough before.”

“I’m just glad you’re alright,” Mabel said, squeezing her hand.

“Look out!” Mr Pines cried. Tentacles heaved the massive dripping body of the tulpa out of the water. They picked themselves up and cleared the beach. The octopus’ movements were clumsy, wobbling and unsteady out of the water Mabel saw her dart sticking out of the flank and knew that the sedative inside was getting to work, sapping the tulpa of its energy. They only had to hold out until it finally relented.

The tulpa glowed and shrunk considerably, turning into a human-sized waffle with a face and beefy arms. “Hey, that’s a Mabel-copyrighted design!” Zera and her father remained baffled by the sight. It didn’t stay in this form for long. After using its arms to pull itself upright, the tulpa dissolved into a swarm of small dome-shaped shells which scattered and darted past their legs. Mabel tried to grab one of the components but it vibrated and sank a few inches into the ground to slip past. The swarm coalesced once it had passed them, choosing a form suited for escape - a winged griffin.

“Oh no you don’t!” Mabel yelled, firing another grappling line at the tulpa’s lion rear. She fell onto her face and was pulled uncomfortably along. Zera leaped beside her and also clutched the trailing cable. Mabel fiddled with her wrist gauntlet until they were suddenly yanked forwards by the mechanism. They managed to land on the tulpa’s back, riding it like an ungainly mount and keeping it grounded for now.

A wooden structure loomed ahead of them. “Watch out for the earthquake shack!” Mr Pines called. The shack that had stood since 1906 toppled over onto its side and the creature thundered past. Mr Pines jogged after them, Apep tangled up in his arms and hissing at him.

Mabel and Zera clung to the griffin, at the part where fur turned to feathers. The wings flapped, sending them gliding over the heads of tourists who were only now aware of the chaos that had been unleashed. With the extra weight from the couple the griffin could barely stay airborne. It adjusted its thrust, flapping its wings harder to achieve a clean lift.

“No, bad griffin! Bad tulpa! Bad ‘sketch from Ford’s journal’! Stop struggling!” Mabel pulled on the feathery head of the creature to no effect. She tried punching the beast with heavy blows, courtesy of her boxing training with Stan, but to no reaction. The sedative was already making the tulpa sluggish and it shrugged off any feeling of pain. It lurched onwards, cresting over the edge of the zoo’s boundary and heading towards the open sea. The setting sun cast an orange glare in their eyes.

“Hold your breath again!” Zera shouted over the rush of air. The griffin dived at the water and carried them both under. It submerged for only a moment before launching back out. Mabel coughed up salt water and rubbed her stinging eyes, while Zera didn’t seem to suffer compared to fresh water. “That’s enough!” Zera bent over and sank her teeth into the griffin’s flank, right above the lion’s tail. Mabel had learnt from close experience that her wife sported a pair of retractable fangs - she’d only found that fact out at the climax of one of their first dates.

Their flight peeled off, following the coast north. The two of them gasped as the imposing might of the Golden Gate Bridge came into view. Zera panicked, but Mabel made what seemed like an insane move. She gripped the tulpa’s head and steered it towards the looming red support beam. “Get ready to jump!”

Zera’s muscles tensed. A moment before the tulpa struck metal she launched herself backwards, doing a pirouette in the air before diving into the ocean. Zera stuck her head out of the water just in time to see Mabel going the opposite way. She fired her grappling hook upwards and swung off the back of the griffin. Out of control, the dazed beast flew headfirst into the support beam. It crumpled against the metal, warping and shifting as most of its body mass melted away. It ended up taking the shape of a small key. Mabel knew this was the President’s Key, able to open locks across the country.

Up above she perched on the edge of a tiny ledge jutting out of the metal. She launched one last shot downwards, grabbing the key in mid air before it was lost in the ocean. She retracted the line and held the tulpa’s inanimate form triumphantly in the air. She cheered down at Zera and began laughing hysterically. “Did you see that? We nearly got killed by a bridge. Woah, this is higher than I realised.” Mabel began to wobble on the platform, slowly falling over. “Vertigo, vertigoing, vertigone.” She held a hand to her forehead and theatrically fell off the ledge.

Zera rolled her eyes down below and aimed an outstretched hand and her over-dramatic wife. “Razzamafoo!” she said, aiming a beam of light at Mabel, who vanished and reappeared in the water next to her in a puff of smoke.

“I knew you’d save me,” Mabel said, grinning like a loon.

Zera touched her forehead with the back of her palm. “The adrenaline’s gone to your head. That’s the last time I use any teleportation magic around you. You’re a menace, May Pines.”

“You know you love me for it.” Despite the cold and wet they kissed while floating in the ocean. Mabel wrapped her arms around Zera, afraid to let go. “I mean it. I love you, Zera.” Mabel didn’t want to be anywhere other than alone in the wide ocean, wrapped in that embrace with the woman she’d married. “So,” she said almost deliriously. “Can you breathe underwater or what?” Zera just burst into giggles.

Atop the bridge a small crowd of onlookers were watching the two of them. Mr Pines pushed his way to the front of the crowd. “Oh thank goodness!”

The two of them in the water turned their heads. “Hey Dad!” Mabel shouted and waved.

“Are you two going to get out?”

Mabel looked Zera in the eye. “I don’t know about you, but a cup of hot cocoa on dry land sounds so good right about now.”

A few minutes later they’d swum to the shoreline, mostly thanks to Zera’s powerful kicks through the water. She was much better adapted for swimming than Mabel, who clung to her wife and let her do most of the work. They rendezvoused with Mr Pines, who’d found some towels for them to dry off. Mabel had even got her precious cocoa, provided by the zoo.

Mr Pines didn’t seem happy with himself, pacing around the parking lot while the girls watched the sunset over the ocean. “I wasn’t much help. I could hardly save the day with bug reports or hacking skills,” he scoffed. “Maybe I’m not cut out for this hero business.”

“No-one’s asking you to be,” Mabel said cheerily. “We only wanted you know what our crazy lives are like. You don’t have to become a full-time participant.”

“I think he did an admirable job at least,” Zera confirmed. She shook his hand and raised a small smile at least.

Mabel examined the golden key she’d retrieved, feeling its weight in her palm. A few tiny particles of golden light floated above its surface. “If the others have caught their tulpa, then it’s two down, one to go.”

#gravity falls #gravity falls fanfic #mabel pines #dipper and mabel's parents

[peterbarnes]

now here are my SPOILER thoughts on Multiverse of Madness

This isn’t a particular order so it’s kind of a mess.

I loved the motif with the watch. The idea that as the watch, this broken thing, can eventually become fixed, just like the characters is beautiful.

The pacing was weird as hell. So for all the action scenes - Shuma Gorath, Kamar-Taj- I was super invested. I thought they were very well put together, especially the former. Wong fighting Shuma Gorath is one of the best choreographed fight sequences. The stunts?? Using magic to conjure a sword?? But then the slower scenes were so slow compared to the others, that when they tried to develop the characters in those moments, I wasn’t super invested. For instance, that super long sequence of Strange and America walking to the sanctum in the new universe and going down “memory lane.” It felt way too long, and almost useless. It didn’t make me feel any differently about America or Strange. Even thought it was the only backstory for America we got and it was supposed to make me feel for her.

I think my problem with America in general is that her demeanor is so timid. In the comics, she’s not afraid to take up space. She’s blunt and in your face but still has this intense compassion for people. This version of America felt like the polar opposite of the one from the comics. And I get that they were trying to develop her confidence and such throughout the movie. But even in her big moment where she finds Wanda at the end, it didn’t feel like a big moment of growth for her. Her punching Wanda doesn’t signify toughness. It’s in your presence, the way you carry yourself. And that was lacking. Plus, America isn’t a magic wielder?? Why did they end her story at Kamar Taj with her learning magic. Her powers are rooted in her use of brute force. So why are they setting up her powers to be more like Strange’s? Why is her story becoming completely rooted in him when she’s supposed to be known for her independence?

Now let’s talk cameos. I think the idea of introducing the Illuminati was fucking genius and perfect for this movie. I mean John fucking Krasinski as Reed Richards??? AMAZING. But if the Illuminati is supposed to be this powerhouse lineup of heroes, why were they all killed off so quickly? I know Wanda is more powerful than on all them on every level, but her killing them all after them being on screen for 3 minutes renders their appearance useless. Merely for shock value and fan pleasing. They could’ve had integral roles in the story. ESPECIALLY professor x. I would have loved to see him have an actual psychic battle or conversation with Wanda. I think that would be fascinating to see him try to reach out to her similarly to how he did with Jean in X3. And I loved how they started to do that when Xavier went inside her head. But they cut it so short by snapping his neck that the opportunity for one of the movies most emotional and vibrant moments was lost. And Charles’ death became lackluster, like all of the other members (except for Captain Marvel, who at least lasted a while).

The only emotional moments that I felt were truly executed well were when Billy and Tommy see the Scarlet Witch and Strange and Christine’s conversation before parting. I think having a huge final battle end with a more emotional scene as compared to the typical action packed blood fest was a smart move. It was the one time Wanda didn’t feel like a simplistic villain. And I saw that as a massive Wanda fan. The whole point is her character is supposed to be extremely complex, always having contradicting emotions and motivations. And that was so well done in Wandavision. She wanted her life back, but she was losing control and hurting people, but she didn’t want to let go. That turmoil is quintessential Wanda. And the only time that was even slightly explored was at the end when Billy and Tommy see her and she started to realize the end doesn’t justify the means. Wanda chronically doubts herself yet she was so sure of herself the entire film. And I think that missed the mark for me.

I was so hyped for this movie. I’d been looking forward to it since it was announced in 2019. And I am so massively disappointed by the direction they took the story in. The sky was the limit for all the things they could have done. This could’ve been the best marvel movie to date. And yet it was messy and underwhelming. As a life long MCU fan, it makes me nervous of the universe’s future. If a massive event such as this movie doesn’t deliver, will future ones? Or will they all feel like they’re just leading up to the next project rather than being cohesive and nuanced stories?

#doctor strange in the multiverse of madness #multiverse of madness #doctor strange #benedict cumberbatch #wandavision #wanda maximoff #elizabeth olsen #scarlet witch #rachel mcadams #america chavez #illuminati #reed richards #john krasinski #professor x #captain carter #captain marvel #black bolt

[walkuntilthedaylight]

The people have spoken! How can I not give them what they want?

I'm gonna put this all under a cut, since it's a bit long, and also because it's highly interpretative/speculative and not everyone likes those kinds of posts as they can be rather subjective and, I suppose, invasive. I want to give two major caveats to my thoughts below: first is that I tend not to buy the idea that Paul was the "stable/normal" Beatle, mostly b/c I view marijuana dependency and workaholism as addictions and I take them pretty seriously. Second is that I really do love this kind of tabloid/gossip/personal account shit; I think it should be taken with a handful of salt, but I don't think it should be entirely dismissed out of hand either. I read this stuff like I'm piling up sheets of stained glass: I'm intrigued by the places where the colours blend and overlap, and ignore things that fall outside the prism. Anyway, let's dig in:

Okay, so what I found fascinating about 'Body Count' is that it's one of the only sources which observes Paul McCartney's mental health during the period between the India trip and when the band breakup really got rolling. I think it's overall a fairly self-absorbed text that definitely has some lies and exaggerations peppered in there to make things spicier and more dramatic, but its broad characterization - as I mentioned in my first post - isn't exactly libelous or out of left field. Some elements that make me think it's generally if not wholly authentic are: Paul's simultaneously forceful and dorky seduction style, his terrible Liverpool diet and poor housekeeping, the bouts of thrill-seeking recklessness, avoidant adventure crafting, dark moods when drinking non-socially, the occasional hot and cold bouts with the Apple Scuffs camped out at his gate, and the way in which he underplays his drug habit, which is SO "in truthfulness we spent most of the filming of Help! slightly stoned":

These details are so bizarrely specific and have significant overlap with both sympathetic and spurned personal accounts of Paul I've read in the past, so I believe Francie is just telling "Her Version Of The Truth" here rather than crafting a piece of pure fiction. The most important and revealing anecdote in the book is this one.

There's no reason not to believe this is a fairly accurate representation of something that actually happened, imo, since we know that anxious purse strings were an ongoing issue in the unusual turnover rate within the band Wings, and there are plenty of confirmed and rumoured cases alike of extended family members feeling entitled to a "piece of the pie"; this is just like, the kind of thing that happens to working class people who get catapulted into fame and fortune. And Paul in particular already had deep-seated financial anxiety for whatever reasons he'll never fully admit (as is his right, but I think his offhand claim that he "once heard some adults arguing about money and that's why" might actually be alluding to having heard some adults - y'know, like his parents - arguing over money fairly frequently). What esp interests me about the anecdote is the way Paul seems to connect the conflict b/t his dual "identities" with these financial expectations. Perhaps the CAPSLOCK emotional hysteria related in the book is puffed up for drama, but it does bring to mind one of the most revealing comments Linda ever made about their relationship, which is that Paul needed to be told he would still be loved when the cameras weren't rolling. And that's the thing: Francie caught Paul at the exact moment that the pillars of his Smile-For-The-Camera "Beatle" identity were collapsing; the dissolution of his relationships with John and Jane.

Whatever all this could possibly mean re: the breakup of the Lennon-McCartney partnership is a post for another time. What I wanna do instead is apply the level of speculation we usually reserve for that relationship to the endpoint of Paul and Jane's courtship.

So like, Paul and Jane: I know people are resistant to this specific POV, but I honestly just don't... think it was that deep? "Not deep", mind you, doesn't mean "not significant". Paul was obviously Jane's first love (u never forget), but the feeling I get from Paul's side (as a subconscious process I mean) is that Jane's importance was primarily as a lynchpin in his London Socialite persona. He loved her family, he loved the friend group, the artistic scene dating her gave him access to, as well as the leg up he got in the class system, etc. He liked to be the kind of guy who was dating Jane Asher. But I don't know that he was the guy who was dating Jane Asher, you get me? When people describe their "great love" they accidentally tell on them (Cynthia innocently describing Paul as being pleased to have her on his arm like a trophy; John: "it was an ordinary love scene"; Alistair Taylor noting that Paul was humiliated by the breakup). Paul's a serial monogamist who U-Hauls like a lesbian, of course, so he definitely took the relationship VERY seriously, but it's telling that all of his love songs to her were either about hitting a brick wall in arguments (certainly not dreamy, fond, yearning of "sunday morning fights about saturday night"; and occasionally expressing hints of class tension too), or completely non-descript Guy With A Guitar Trying To Get Laid shit. I could extrapolate a lot about Linda just from listening to McCartney I/RAM and the Wings discography, but 'And I Love Her' doesn't tell me a single thing about Jane besides that she's pretty. It could be about literally anyone the same way 'My Love' or 'Maybe I'm Amazed' could only be about his dynamic with Linda. Some of this is obviously the natural result of getting older and gaining emotional maturity; what I'm saying is that Paul's behaviour and self-expression in this relationship does not suggest to me that it was one in which his emotional maturity was able to develop or flourish.

I want to stress again that I don't think this belittles the significance of the relationship or makes it "bad" or "fake". Like, sometimes hot people just date for a while in their teens and twenties and love each other without necessarily unlocking their inner emotional cores, usually because they don't know how to. It's, like, fine. You need to experience relationships like that as stepping stones. I simply believe that this sort of front-facing social importance being prime in the romance is a major factor in why it ultimately didn't work (and probably in Linda's reported lingering jealousy of Jane, who wasn't just an ex, but also a symbol of the life Paul ditched to build a new identity w/ her, and sometimes still pined for). With Jane, Paul was dating the "right" kind of girl (didn't put out on the first date, erudite and middle class, as serious about her career as he was, a good "celebrity" match), but the relationship often wasn't doing what he wanted it to do. Francie's observation is that by 1968 it also wasn't doing what he needed it to do either. This is the overwhelming "mood" in her affair with Paul McCartney: that he needed something very badly from a romantic partner that he just was NOT getting, and Francie couldn't figure out what it was either:

(note that she means "queer" as in "mad", not "gay")

This was an EXTREMELY roundabout way of asking: well, what WAS it that Paul needed a relationship to do for him? And I think this is Francie's big, accidental insight. The most scandalous claim in 'Body Count' is that Paul told Francie that he hit Jane and it "turned her on".

I personally think this is p. absurd absent any real proof to back it up, but like, what is Francie actually saying HE'S saying here? If she's exaggerating or lying, she's trying to make it believable within the psychological parameters laid out, right? It's not an expression of some secret desire to dominate women she's accusing him of, but emotional disturbance and confusion at the idea that the woman he was with might like that sort of forceful, masculine violence more than his softer, feminine side, which he was - yeah, we all know it - deeply insecure about.

Regardless of whether specific details are true or false (and I think there's both in this story, all hyper-magnified to make it, y'know, a ~STORY~), I think what might be true is the emotional undertow of the retelling, that this all taken together is actually representative of the side of Paul McCartney she was exposed to, at a time when his public and private facades had both become unbearable to the point of cracking and the drug-fueled optimism of the Summer of Love was getting scrubbed off of everyone and everything. It's the Paul McCartney who eviscerated frogs because he was worried he was too "soft" for compulsory military service. The Paul who modelled his masculine teen behaviour off John Lennon's fake "Marlon Brando" swagger, but was actually more fond of the velvet "Oscar Wilde" interior.

What's SO FASCINATING about all this to me, is I deeply believe that one of the key factors in what makes The Beatles music so unique and compelling is that both the songwriters experienced psychological strain from the tension b/t their parochial socially-defensive "masculine" pride, and their sensitive "feminine" core, the latter of which they were able to express in the unburdened emotionality of their music. The reason I care about doing these totally unhinged psych analyses is because I do think it reveals something about the underpinnings of the music, as well as the reasons why the band was such a hysteria-inducing phenomenon (the rise of psychology, imo, is almost as important as the rise of industrialization as a defining factor of the modern and postmodern eras; mass psychology can be understood and wielded in precise ways, and The Beatles were one of the first empires built on that). The subconscious drives caused by this tension have been ENDLESSLY picked apart re: John's psyche, but Paul's "mirrored" issues are very under-discussed (mostly b/c he's still alive so people are a little more leery about putting him on the "couch" as a historical figure). 'Body Count', intentionally or not, painted a portrait to me of someone who was drowning in their own ill-fitting celebrity "suit", collapsing under the weight of "Being" "Paul McCartney". A guy who desperately needed some sort of space to be vulnerable without feeling emasculated for doing it. By 1968, there was no one in his life anymore - and maybe there hadn't been for a while, or ever - who was giving him this space.

In other words: the thing he needed to avoid going "stark raving queer and killing himself" was simply someone who would love him 'after the ball'.

EDIT: read the comments for further clarification and discussion! ;)

#/ #// #/// #//// #///// #the beatles #mccharmley #analysis #long post #Talking About Paul The Way I Talk About John lmfao #Taking Tabloid Bullshit Seriously #(if not literally) #*gets out my fake spectacles and jumps into the psychiatry armchair* #idk if i laid out my thoughts v well here but i hope it satisfied all the people who asked #i also tried to warn what genre of post it was for those who hate this kinda thing lol #i feel like i have more to say re: how toxic 'The Beatle' facade got for all of them by this point #and paul and john's mirrored post-india breakdowns #but francie's perspective is specifically on how it felt to be the girl he used to divebomb his relationship with jane asher SO

[howelljenkins]

As a muslim Iraqi American with a significant tumblr following, I feel as though I should let it be known exactly where I stand when it comes to Riordan’s statement about Samirah. I have copied and pasted it down below and my reaction to it will be written down below. This will be the first time I have read it. If you want to engage with me or tell me that I’m wrong, I expect you to be a muslim, hijabi, Iraqi American, and from Baghdad. If you are not, I suggest you sit down and keep quiet because you are not the authority on the way I should be represented.

Like many of my characters, Samirah was inspired by former students of mine. Over the course of my middle school teaching career, I worked with dozens of Muslim students and their families, representing the expanse of the Muslim world and both Shia and Sunni traditions. One of my most poignant memories about the September 11, 2001, attack of the World Trade Center was when a Muslima student burst into tears when she heard the news – not just because it was horrific, but also because she knew what it meant for her, her family, her faith. She had unwillingly become an ambassador to everyone she knew who, would have questions about how this attack happened and why the perpetrators called themselves “Muslim.” Her life had just become exponentially more difficult because of factors completely beyond her control. It was not right. It was not fair. And I wasn’t sure how to comfort or support her.

Starting off your statement with one of the most traumatic events in history for muslim Americans is already one of the most predictably bad moves he could pull. By starting off this way, you are acknowledging the fact that a) this t*rrorist attack is still the first thing you think of when you think of muslims and b) that those muslim students who you had prior to 9/11 occupied so little space in your mind that it took a national disaster for you to start to even try to empathize with them.

During the following years, I tried to be especially attuned to the needs of my Muslim students. I dealt with 9/11 the same way I deal with most things: by reading and learning more. When I taught world religions in social studies, I would talk to my Muslim students about Islam to make sure I was representing their experience correctly. They taught me quite a bit, which eventually contributed to my depiction of Samirah al-Abbas. As always, though, where I have made mistakes in my understanding, those mistakes are wholly on me.

As always, you have chosen to use “I based this character off my students” in order to justify the way they are written. News flash: you taught middle school children. Children who are already scrutinized and alienated and desperate to fit in. Of course their words shouldn’t be enough for you to decide you are representing them correctly, because they are still coming to terms with their identities and they are doing this in an environment where they are desperate to find the approval of white Americans. I know that as a child I would often tweak the way I explained my culture and religion to my teachers in order to gain their approval and avoid ruffling any feathers. They told you what they thought you’d want to hear because you are their teacher and hold a position of power over them and they both want your approval and want to avoid saying the wrong thing and having that hang over their heads every time they enter your classroom.

What did I read for research? I have read five different English interpretations of the Qur’an. (I understand the message is inseparable from the original Arabic, so it cannot be considered ‘translated’). I have read the entirety of the Sahih Bukhari and Sahih Muslim hadith collections. I’ve read three biographies of Prophet Muhammed (peace be upon him) and well over a dozen books about the history of Islam and modern Islam. I took a six-week course in Arabic. (I was not very good at it, but I found it fascinating). I fasted the month of Ramadan in solidarity with my students. I even memorized some of the surahs in Arabic because I found the poetry beautiful. (They’re a little rusty now, I’ll admit, but I can still recite al-Fātihah from memory.) I also read some anti-Islamic screeds written in the aftermath of 9/11 so I would understand what those commenters were saying about the religion, and indirectly, about my students. I get mad when people attack my students.

And yet here you are actively avoiding the criticism from those of us who could very well have been the children sitting in your classroom. 

The Quran is so deep and complex that its meanings are still being discovered to this day. Yes, reading these old scripts is a must for writing muslim characters, but you cannot claim to understand them without also holding active discussions with current scholars on how the Quran’s teachings apply today.

When preparing to write Samirah’s background, I drew on all of this, but also read many stories on Iraqi traditions and customs in particular and the experiences of immigrant families who came to the U.S. I figured out how Samirah’s history would intertwine with the Norse world through the medieval writer Ahmad ibn Fadhlan, her distant ancestor and one of the first outsiders to describe the Vikings in writing.  I knew Samirah would be a ferocious brave fighter who always stood for what was right. She would be an excellent student who had dreams of being an aviator. She would have a complicated personal situation to wrestle with, in that she’s a practicing Muslim who finds out Valhalla is a real place. Odin and Thor and Loki are still around. How do you reconcile that with your faith? Not only that, but her mom had a romance with Loki, who is her dad. Yikes.

First of all, writing this paragraph in the same tone you use to emulate a 12 year old is already disrespectful. “Yikes” is correct. You have committed serious transgressions and can’t even commit to acting serious and writing like the almost 60 year old man that you are. Tone tells the reader a lot, and your tone is telling me that you are explaining your mistakes the same way you tell your little stories: childishly and jokingly. 

Stories are not enough. They are not and never will be. Stories cannot even begin to pierce the rich culture and history and customs of Iraq. Iraq itself is not even homogenous enough for you to rely on these “Iraqi” stories. Someone’s story from Najaf is completely unique from someone from Baghdad or Nasriyyah or Basrah or Mosul. Add that to the fact that these stories are written with a certain audience in mind and you realize that there’s no way they can tell the whole story because at their core they are catering to a specific audience.

Yes, those are good, but they are meaningless without you consulting an actual Baghdadi and asking specific questions. You made conclusions and assumptions based on these stories when the obvious way to go was to consult someone from Baghdad every step of the writing process. Instead, you chose to trust the conclusions that you (a white man) drew from a handful of stories. Who are you to convey a muslim’s internal struggle when you did not even do the bare minimum and have an actual muslim read over your words?

Thankfully, the feedback from Muslim readers over the years to Samirah al-Abbas has been overwhelmingly positive. I have gotten so many letters and messages online from young fans, talking about how much it meant to them to see a hijabi character portrayed in a positive light in a ‘mainstream’ novel.

Yeah. Because we’re desperate, and half of them are children still developing their sense of self and critical reading skills. A starving man will thank you for moldy bread but that does not negate the mold. 

Some readers had questions, sure! The big mistake I will totally own, and which I have apologized for many times, was my statement that during the fasting hours of Ramadan, bathing (i.e. total immersion in water) was to be avoided. This was advice I had read on a Shia website when I myself was preparing to fast Ramadan. It is advice I followed for the entire month. Whoops! The intent behind that advice, as I understood it, was that if you totally immersed yourself during daylight hours, you might inadvertently get some water between your lips and invalidate your fast. But, as I have since learned, that was simply one teacher’s personal opinion, not a widespread practice. We have corrected this detail (which involved the deletion of one line) in future editions, but as I mentioned in my last post, you will still find it in copies since the vast majority of books are from the first printing.

This is actually really embarrassing for you and speaks to your lack of research and reading comprehension. It is true that for shia, immersion breaks one’s fast. If you had bothered to actually ask questions and use common sense, you would realize that this is referring to actions like swimming, where one’s whole body is underwater, rather than bathing. Did you not question the fact that the same religion that encourages the cleansing of oneself five times a day banned bathing during the holiest month? Yes, it was one teacher’s opinion, but you literally did not even take the time to fully understand that opinion before chucking it into your book.

Another question was about Samirah’s wearing of the hijab. To some readers, she seemed cavalier about when she would take it off and how she would wear it. It’s not my place to be prescriptive about proper hijab-wearing. As any Muslim knows, the custom and practice varies greatly from one country to another, and from one individual to another. I can, however, describe what I have seen in the U.S., and Samirah’s wearing of the hijab reflects the practice of some of my own students, so it seemed to be within the realm of reason for a third-generation Iraqi-American Muslima. Samirah would wear hijab most of the time — in public, at school, at mosque. She would probably but not always wear it in Valhalla, as she views this as her home, and the fallen warriors as her own kin. This is described in the Magnus Chase books. I also admit I just loved the idea of a Muslima whose hijab is a magic item that can camouflage her in times of need.

Before I get into this paragraph, Samirah is second generation. Her grandparents immigrated from Iraq. Her mother was first gen.

Once again, you turn to what you have seen from your students, who are literal children. They are in middle school while Samirah is in high school, so they are very obviously at different stages of development, both emotional and religious. If you had bothered to talk to adults who had gone through these stages, you would understand that often times young girls have stages where they “practice” hijab or wear it “part time”, very often in middle school. However, both her age and the way in which you described Samirah lead the reader to believe that she is a “full timer,” so you playing willy nilly with her scarf as a white man is gross.

For someone who claims to have read all of these religious texts, it’s funny that you choose to overlook the fact that “kin” is very specifically described. Muslims do not go around deciding who they consider “kin” or “family” to take off their hijab in front of. There is no excuse for including this in her character, especially since you claim to have carefully read the Quran and ahadith.

You have no place to “just love” any magical extension of the hijab until you approach it with respect. Point blank period. Especially when you have ascribed it a magical property that justifies her taking it on and off like it’s no big deal, especially when current media portrayals of hijab almost always revolve around it being removed. You are adding to the harmful portrayal and using your “fun little magic camoflauge” to excuse it.

As for her betrothal to Amir Fadhlan, only recently have I gotten any questions about this. My understanding from my readings, and from what I have been told by Muslims I know, is that arranged marriages are still quite common in many Muslim countries (not just Muslim countries, of course) and that these matches are sometimes negotiated by the families when the bride-to-be and groom-to-be are quite young. Prior to writing Magnus Chase, one of the complaints I often heard or read from Muslims is how Westerners tend to judge this custom and look down on it because it does not accord with Western ideas. Of course, arranged marriages carry the potential for abuse, especially if there is an age differential or the woman is not consulted. Child marriages are a huge problem. The arrangement of betrothals years in advance of the marriage, however, is an ancient custom in many cultures, and those people I know who were married in this way have shared with me how glad they were to have done it and how they believe the practice is unfairly villainized. My idea with Samirah was to flip the stereotype of the terrible abusive arranged match on its head, and show how it was possible that two people who actually love each other dearly might find happiness through this traditional custom when they have families that listen to their concerns and honor their wishes, and want them to be happy. Amir and Samirah are very distant cousins, yes. This, too, is hardly unusual in many cultures. They will not actually marry until they are both adults. But they have been betrothed since childhood, and respect and love each other. If that were not the case, my sense is that Samirah would only have to say something to her grandparents, and the match would be cancelled. Again, most of the comments I have received from Muslim readers have been to thank me for presenting traditional customs in a positive rather than a negative light, not judging them by Western standards. In no way do I condone child marriage, and that (to my mind) is not anywhere implied in the Magnus Chase books.

I simply can’t even begin to explain everything that is wrong with this paragraph. Here is a good post about how her getting engaged at 12 is absolutely wrong religiously and would not happen. Add that on to the fact that Samirah herself is second-generation (although Riordan calls her third generation in this post) and this practice isn’t super common even in first generation people (and for those that it DOES apply to, it is when they are old enough to be married and not literal children). 

As a white man you can’t flip the stereotype. You can’t. Even with tons of research you cannot assume the authority to “flip” a stereotype that does not affect you because you will never come close to truly understanding it inside and out. Instead of flipping a stereotype, Rick fed into it and provided more fodder to the flames and added on to it to make it even worse.

I would be uncomfortable with a white author writing about arranged marriages in brown tradition no matter the context, but for him to offhandedly include it in a children’s book where it is badly explained and barely touched on is inexcusable. Your target audience is children who will no doubt overlook your clumsy attempt at flipping stereotypes.

It does not matter what your mind thinks you are implying. Rick Riordan is not your target audience, children are. So you cannot brush this away by stating that you did not see the harm done by your writing. You are almost 60 years old. Maybe you can read in between your lines, but I guarantee your target audience largely cannot.

Finally, recently someone on Twitter decided to screenshot a passage out-of-context from Ship of the Deadwhere Magnus hears Samirah use the phrase “Allahu Akbar,” and the only context he has ever heard it in before was in news reports when some Western reporter would be talking about a terrorist attack. Here is the passage in full:

Samirah: “My dad may have power over me because he’s my dad. But he’s not the biggest power. Allahu akbar.”

I knew that term, but I’d never heard Sam use it before. I’ll admit it gave me an instinctive jolt in the gut. The news media loved to talk about how terrorists would say that right before they did something horrible and blew people up. I wasn’t going to mention that to Sam. I imagined she was painfully aware.

She couldn’t walk the streets of Boston in her hijab most days without somebody screaming at her to go home, and (if she was in a bad mood) she’d scream back, “I’m from Dorchester!”

“Yeah,” I said. “That means God is great, right?”

Sam shook her head. “That’s a slightly inaccurate translation. It means God is greater.”

“Than what?”

“Everything. The whole point of saying it is to remind yourself that God is greater than whatever you are facing—your fears, your problems, your thirst, your hunger, your anger.

337-338

To me, this is Samirah educating Magnus, and through him the readers, about what this phrase actually means and the religious significance it carries. I think the expression is beautiful and profound. However, like a lot of Americans, Magnus has grown up only hearing about it in a negative context from the news. For him to think: “I had never heard that phrase, and it carried absolutely no negative connotations!” would be silly and unrealistic. This is a teachable moment between two characters, two friends who respect each other despite how different they are. Magnus learns something beautiful and true about Samirah’s religion, and hopefully so do the readers. If that strikes you as Islamophobic in its full context, or if Samirah seems like a hurtful stereotype . . . all I can say is I strongly disagree.

I will give you some credit here in that I mostly agree with this scene. The phrase does carry negative connotations with many white people and I do not fault you for explaining it the way you did. However, don’t try to sneak in that last sentence like we won’t notice. You have no place to decide whether or not Samirah’s character as a whole is harmful and stereotypical. 

It is 2 am and that is all I have the willpower to address. This is messy and this is long and this is not well worded, but this had to be addressed. I do not speak for every muslim, both world wide and within this online community, but these were my raw reactions to his statement. I have been working on and will continue to work on a masterpost of Samirah Al-Abbas as I work through the books, but for now, let it be known that Riordan has bastardized my identity and continues to excuse himself and profit off of enforcing harmful stereotypes. Good night.

#* #og #rr crit #samirah al abbas #rick riordan

[battstatix]

Danny “Ghostface” Johnson Headcanons - Part 3

Relationships!

Main Relationships (that I write):

Dwight: Danny adores Dwight and is deeply fascinated by his competence despite being the kind of person most people wouldn’t offer a second look. Dwight’s ability to outsmart Danny quickly became an attractive trait, furthered by Dwight’s sweet shyness and the eventually obvious fact that he is somewhat aroused by the cat-and-mouse games himself. Finds Dwight very fun to tease and fluster.

Anna: Anna’s hunting prowess became an easy source of entertainment for Danny, who realized he missed being hunted down. Of course, things got sexual quickly given that she’s a big beautiful woman and always found a way to catch him. That being said, he might have accidentally developed feelings for her and they genuinely get along. He likes pampering her and hyping her up. 

Killers:

Evan: Despite Evan’s exceeding disinterest, Danny sees him as an ear for his woes, which are usually related to getting owned by survivors. Evan tolerates him but is not particularly invested in his problems. Ji-Woon: Danny fucking hates him (the feeling is mutual) because he’s the only other killer whose ego is as big as his own. He scoffs at the Trickster for being too over-the-top and without tact. Yes, he also thinks he’s very sexy, and he’s mad about it. Is completely oblivious to how similar they are as people.

The Legion: Danny is their friendly but strange uncle figure. He continually gives them terrible life advice and backwards pep talks in a way that seems like he is genuinely trying to be helpful to them. (Evan usually butts in with “don’t listen to that guy”). Surprisingly protective of them, though it’s not as if they really need his help with anything. Might see a bit of himself in the rag-tag group of overly frustrated kids that didn’t get proper support.

Michael: Tall, evil and handsome, so of course Danny has a crush on him. Like most things, it is unknown what Michael thinks about this.

Sally: Danny talks about her like she’s a droll party pooper but in actuality she kind of freaks him out.

Philip: Also sees him as a bit of an Eeyore but puts... something of an effort into cheering him up in his own weird way. It typically doesn’t work.

Amanda: They kind of have a half-jokingly antagonistic good-friends-with-benefits type thing going on. Danny hangs out in her realm a lot when he’s bored and has a tendency of touching things he’s not supposed to. She’s probably the most willing to share (or listen to) hot gossip about the other killers.

Adiris: She literally barely registers that he exists, he goes constantly back and forth on whether he is attracted to her beauty and power or disgusted by the... well. The plague part.

Kazan, Nemesis, Pyramid Head, Pinhead, Carmina: He would like to know them carnally.

Max, Rin, Sadako, Bubba: Similar to his relationship with the Legion, he sees himself as some kind of self-appointed guardian figure to them, which they mostly amusedly tolerate.

Demogorgon: Can regularly be found playing catch with Demo (probably using someone’s arm as the stick)

Lisa: She tried to take a bite out of him once. Avoid.

Jeffrey (Clown): Did some pre-contact snooping on the Clown and decided no thank you. He thinks his particular brand of serial killing gives the lot of them a bad name. (He’s the only one who thinks like this)

The Twins: He wants to put the moves on Charlotte but Victor both freaks him out AND keeps trying to kick his ass.

Herman: He doesn’t particularly like Herman because it’s impossible for him to be sneaky anywhere near him. Herman seems to think they’re best friends for some reason, which Danny sort of grimly tolerates.

Caleb and Talbot: Both of them think Danny is super annoying and have very limited tolerance for his presence. They see him as immature.

Freddy: Nobody likes Freddy because he’s the shitty remake version

The Entity: Danny considers himself particularly devoted to her and is willing to do an awful lot of things to remain the Golden Boy. (Some of those things might involve tentacles) Unknown if the Entity had an influence in his life prior to the fog, though he suspects it could be a possibility once he hears the way others talk about their experiences. 

I haven’t really fleshed out his relationships with the other survivors, but Dwight is definitely the closest he’s gotten to any of them. Mostly, he’s amused by the others and their antics, but keeps them at an arms distance and doesn’t really have any personal relationships with them.

#dbd #dead by daylight #ghostface #danny johnson #jed olsen #headcanons

[blacksunscorpio]

What does it mean when I have a Capricorn signature?

Signature Sign In Astrology

You might have heard the term signature sign thrown around if you’ve been studying astrology for a while. Others of you might not have heard if this concept at all. It isn’t as well-known, however, it can reveal significant information about you.

What it Means

To put it plainly, the astrological signature sign is the zodiac sign that’s the most specific to you and your character.

How to find it

It involves noting which element and quality/modality appear the most or has the most signs and then combining them into a zodiac sign which is taken to be the signature sign of the chart. It will be easy to do because certain characteristics of signs will repeat themselves. It’s the most frequent modality and element in your natal chart.

Ex. 1 A person has more fire signs than any other element, and more fixed signs than any other quality, then that person's signature is Leo. In some cases, there is no clear majority in either element or quality to give a clear signature. When this occurs, an individual has an Ambiguous Signature.

Ex. 2  Let’s say you are a Taurus Sun, a fixed earth sign. But many planets in mutable signs take up residence in your chart. In addition, you have a multitude of planets in water. This makes you feel like a Neptunian/Pisces, which is a mutable water sign. You might not have many or any for that matter significant placements in Pisces but somehow still identify with the qualities of the sign to a great extent.

How To Find It Cont.

You weigh the elements and modalities of the sign where a planet is located in your chart. Begin with the Sun, next Moon and repeat this process for all the planets in your natal chart: Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto. The ascendant and the Midheaven also have to be considered.

Signature Signs Through The Zodiac

Aries signature

If Aries is your signature sign, you are ambitious and have a strong will. Boss-like. Warrior. Killer instinct. Can sometimes be hot-headed and impulsive, it happens that you act before you think instead of the other way around which can get you into serious trouble. Don’t be Oberyn from GoT and get cocky now. However, you’re a born leader and like to initiate things. Taking action is your second nature. No one will ever pull the Hermit card or 4 of cups for you in a Tarot reading. Way too active. A straightforward sign, which sometimes blends into bluntness, bossiness, or take-no-prisoners attitude. Being independent is very important to you. You hate being told what to do. You like to work alone if you can. Competitive and brave, someone who loves new challenges. You love to win. Will always be after new opportunities to conquer.

Taurus signature 

If Taurus is your astrological signature sign, you prefer to think before you act. Need a lot of time to make a decision, but once it’s done, nothing can make you change your mind. You are incredibly stubborn and persistent. Taurus is the sign of hedonism. If this is your signature sign in astrology, you know how to enjoy life. You appreciate good food, beautiful clothes, and everything luxurious. Taurus craves stability, both financially and emotionally. You are dependable and passionate. Love to cook and or shop for expensive and good quality things. Can be jealous in love or possessive as well. Bullheaded to the point of no return but just as ambitious when it comes to cultivating stability and wealth.

Gemini signature

If Gemini is your signature sign, you are curious, witty, and chatty. You are a great observant, someone who notices every detail, and then make a pun about it. Gemini is incredibly smart. They love to read and write, and they are usually talented when it comes to expressing themselves. However, Gemini because of their mercurial flighty nature can lack focus if they don’t reign it in somehow. This flightiness can give others the impression that they are sometimes superficial. You get bored veryyy quickly. Because of this, you need a lot of mental stimulation. Geminis are life-long learners, they are simply in love with knowledge. Need to be sure to keep that devil and angel [your twins] aligned so as to not make enemies or be seen as two-faced.

Cancer signature 

If Cancer is your signature sign in astrology, you are a gentle soul. However, you become easily overwhelmed with others. Cancer is a crab and will retreat into its shell if it’s not in the mood to deal. Can be moody and or need a lot of time on your own, in the safety of your home. They like to be surrounded by family members. You are soft and caring. HIGHKEY intuitive and can sense the emotions of others easily [especially when developed.] They are extremely protective of their loved ones. Will pinch you with their claws if you mess with them or someone they care about.

Leo signature

If your signature sign is Leo, you have a big heart. Quite warm and sincere. Famous for its generosity. They, like Jupiterians like to give- especially in terms of love and affection. Leos need luxury around them. They are the royalty of the zodiac, right? They enjoy being around others, making people laugh and cheering them up. Have lots of energy but a big ego to go with it. They love attention and might court it often or simply get it naturally since the Sun is in the mix here. Too much of the negative manifestation of Leo can make one prone to arrogance, bossiness, and boastfulness. It’s important to realize that this wounds people around you. If you show others your soft side, they will give you all the love you crave.

Virgo signature 

If Virgo is your signature sign, you are modest, effective, and helpful. Deeply analytical and process information at the drop of a hat. Productivity is very important to you. Virgos have a high attention to detail, and they solve problems by analyzing them. Rational and cerebral thinking is one of your greatest strengths. Quite reliable and have a strong sense of duty. Can be hyper-critical and a bit too compulsive in their tendencies. Prone to nervousness and anxious habits. However, this sign has a very powerful brain. They prefer thinking over feeling, which can be sometimes challenging for them. 

Libra signature 

If your signature sign is Libra, you’ll be quite elegant. Venusian, baby. No matter what they do, they’ll make sure to do it with their face on and in their best attire. Libras are graceful and charming. They have great social skills, and they get along with everyone. However, sometimes they don’t stand up for themselves even when they should or because they wish to avoid conflict at all costs. They can also be a bit superficial which might be perceived as “fake” by some. There’s a deep need to be liked. Quite good taste though. Keen artistic talents. Great diplomats and would do well as an ambassador or even in HR [actually, please think about getting into Human Resources, there are way too many pieces of shit in this particular department]. This sign strives to create harmony, both visually and in interpersonal relationships.

Scorpio signature 

If your signature sign is Scorpio, you possess the qualities of Pluto. You have a deep mind, are intense and probing with perhaps a bit of a mysterious aura. You make a perfect detective. Nothing stays hidden. Quite loyal and passionate with intense emotions. Intuition is superb, but you are very sensitive at the same time. Scorpio can become obsessed with the object of their love. May be prone to jealousy in love or be quite ruthless and vengeful if slighted. It’s important NOT to get on this person’s bad side because Scorpios rarely [if ever] forgive. Is probably very sexual or unmatched in bed. Might end up rich [Pluto=wealth]. Might become a Mafia-boss. Might become a dictator. Might run a funeral home. Depends, lol.

Sagittarius signature

Expansion. Jupiter rules this sign and as a result one with this signature loves new experiences that aid them in understanding the world better. Optimistic and with a great sense of humor, people love being around them. They have high energy levels and they are always on the go. If your signature sign is Sagittarius, you have an unshakable faith in the universe. Philosophical prowess and an open mind with a streak of jolliness The sign of philosophy, and always looking towards the bright side. Might be blunt, unattached, and a bit dramatic or louder than most, however, lucky breaks might come often or in the nick of time. Makes sense since Jupiter rules luck.

Capricorn signature 

If Capricorn is your signature sign, there are significant earthy vibes to you, no matter your actual sign. Said native is reliable, efficient, and incredibly meticulous, and high-key ambitious. There’s a great need for success that borderlines on obsession. They are empowered by executive achievements and accomplishments. Order, structure, and discipline are paramount. Capricorns are famous in astrology for being known as hard workers who put a lot of effort into achieving their goals. They do not give up. They will climb the ladder, do or die. Typically will be quite successful in life. Often accused of being cold or cruel. Hell, they might be. Still, they are in need and are deserving of love and commitment. Reliable in a relationship once they decide to stop restricting themselves of affection and give in.

Aquarius signature 

Unique and eccentric, you always notice it when you meet an Aquarian. If Aquarius is your signature sign, you prefer to live life on your own terms. Freedom is your most important value in life. You enjoy being around like-minded people, even though your relationships are usually not of an emotional nature. Aquarius is the sign of brilliance in astrology. I always say that Aquarians have the highest levels of analytical intelligence but sometimes get written off because they can be weirdos lol. Mad scientist vibes. Wonderful ideas, fascinated by everything new and modern. Tech geeks. Aquarius is also the sign of humanitarian ideals. If you have this sign strong in your chart, you have a strong sense of justice.

Pisces signature

If Pisces is your signature sign, you have a very strong intuition. Quite sensitive to the point that all that white noise can easily overwhelm them. Hard to make out reality sometimes. Hence, Pisces needs to spend a lot of time alone in suspension thinking about things. Compassionate and have a strong sympathy for those suffering. Great healing abilities and an even greater imagination and creative streak. Probably feels quite good around water and can have a psychic knack with animals. Can be very musical and often have strong artistic talents. Be sure to tether yourself to this world so as to not float off. Escapism is okay but don’t escape reality too much. You may have come from another realm but in this incarnation, you were placed here for a reason. You belong here on earth with us ;).  

#Signature signs in astrology #signature sign #excellent question #astro asks #astrology asks #astro tumblr #astrology advice #aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces #bruja tips #mutable #cardinal #fixed #elements in astrology

[maxwell-grant]

i have been watching old (and sometimes new) gmod animations and i grew up watching enough ytps to know the general idea behind them, and i recently gained a sort of fascination for them. there's something special about them that i couldn't quite put into words, but i think you got it down perfectly in your post about grand guignol. basically, thanks a bunch for that.

Well thank you! And, yeah, I pretty much grew up watching GMOD and YTP constantly and even today I still come back to those a lot when I'm restless and taking a break from work, and I think there's genuinely a lot that can be learned or discussed from them as uniquely 21st Century art forms.

I've been rewatching a lot of Raxxo's content lately and I think it was his content in particular that kind of convinced me that the "GMOD/SFM - Grand Guignol" analogy wasn't nearly as much of deranged word salad as I assumed it was, because in all honestly, if you had to try and condense his videos into a genre or definition or something of the sort, what the hell else can you possibly call this that in any way comes close to describing what you experience?

Like, all of his videos are described as "GMOD animated in SFM", because SFM is usually associated with more straightforward dramatic content while GMOD has been cartoon madness from the start (and it's fascinating to watch just how tame even the early Rubberfruit videos are compared to the kind of stuff Eltorro64 or Dr Lalve are putting out), and Raxxo is the latter in the style of the former.

And his videos are not just a non-stop barrage of brain-breaking, because they have weirdly dramatic pauses, and moments of straightforward action, or simple sentence mixing, and there's continuity between his videos, and incredibly smooth and natural gestures following by the characters stretching and deforming like jello monsters on the next second as their screams warble to drown the soundtrack and then everything's back to normal, and then they start doing things that kinda even make some sense as a narrative, but you cannot even begin explaining properly why, and I've watched these so many times that I even kinda start to see what makes sense and what doesn't, even though literally no one other than Raxxo is ever going to guess why he made the choices he did, and god these jokes must have taken hours if not days to render, why does the scretching Soldier head saying "Sputnik!" shows up in everything he does, and oh did I mention he also makes up the soundtracks he uses himself and they don't match in the slightest most people's perception of his content?

And for the finale of the Soldier Dispenser saga he created maybe the most batshit collaborative animation effort on Youtube, which is about an hour's worth of 200 animators all creating their own little batshit mini-stories in reference to his own and, seriously, who the hell could have possibly predicted something like this existing back when computer game Team Fortress 2 was announced in 2007? Or when Youtube was created?

Who could have possibly predicted something like this existing at any point in human history? Where else could anyone possibly experience this much audiovisual chaos anywhere? I can't even bring myself to watch the video in full again, but that this exists at all, and that it's far from the only one of it's kind, and that Team Fortress 2 fan content has spiraled so hard past anything the creators could have possibly predicted that it has self-sustaining meme ecosystems (Remember when smexuals were a thing? Or the Freaks?), that it's still fucking going 15 years past the game's debut, is, it's kind of a lot, is what I'm saying.

Like, I'm speaking as someone who studies a lot of pop culture and combs through it's most obscure and weirdest recesses to find stuff to write about, I'm still just as baffled by how far these things have gotten as I was when experiencing it for the first time. And you can find a lot of stories like these digging through Youtube Poop and the specific styles of certain creators or certain developing memes for franchises that grow and grow and permutate.

Think about what has to have happened to make a video like iteachvader's What'll It Be? happen.

Long John Baldry, blues musician extraordinaire, voiced cartoon villain Dr Robotnik in a Sonic cartoon. Said Sonic cartoon and performance was lucky enough to survive through Youtube clips. People noticed one of said clips of his performance has him saying a word that sounds like penis in a funny way, so they start making jokes about it, and parodies, and then literally hundreds of parodies popularizing the concept as a source of comedy, some of which take the form of music. Said music is done by cutting, remixing and splicing audio from said performance over music beats, which can be a PAINSTAKINGLY LONG PROCESS as someone who's tried doing that several times now, all this to make something with "Poop" in it's name (which I guess isn't that different from pulp writers spending weeks and months breaking their fingers to put out a novel's worth of content every month, for newspapers and magazines that were literally going to be used as toilet paper later)

These parodies catch on a bit and die out for a bit, until iteachvader comes along, and he proceeds to build a career not just by making funny parodies of said cartoon, but also knocking out genuinely really, really good musical parodies, editing voice clips of said performance to make it sound like the villain's singing (and additionally, he also creates his own tunes, and he's shown that literally every sound he uses is taken from the show, which is just, absolutely mind-boggling effort). He's also created over the years a running joke of Tails being Dr Robotnik's son that people liked enough to ask for more, and then we come to the video above, which is a song about Dr Robotnik spoiling his son Tails asking him what he'll want, which is not at all in line with how the two characters are canonically. And said remixes would eventually get remixed even further, even with crossovers with other characters or musicians, and so forth.

And that is the story of how dozens of creators working separately, and with little intent other than goofing around, single-handedly revived a dead man's music career, as the voice of the fan reinterpretation of a animated adaptation of a videogame villain, popular to the billions if not dozens of billions of views over a decade in the making, on a broadcasting platform said man didn't even live to see being created.

I think sometimes we like to think of ourselves as advanced and jaded enough that nothing surprises us anymore, and if we went back in time and showed an iphone to our great-grandparents they'd start screaming in sheer confusion. And, maybe they would, yeah, but imagine if you were Long John Baldry at any point in his life, even after he finished recording his lines as Robotnik, and someone showed up to you and explained that all of this was going to happen to you, to your voice, to your performance. Imagine if you were one of Valve's lead developers working on Team Fortress 2 during the nine years it spent in development, and someone showed you Raxxo's work and Soldier's Dispenser Quest and just, everything that had happened to characters you hadn't even fully created yet.

I imagine Long John Baldry would have taken it well enough eventually, by all accounts he was a fun person who loved to try new things, and he was an openly gay British vocalist in the 1960s when it was literally illegal to be gay in Britain, so I imagine nothing could possibly rattle his cage that deep in the long run.

But can you honestly tell me you wouldn't freak out at least a little trying to understand just what exactly the future was showing you? Can you honestly tell me your cynicism and world-weariness would be worth anything in the face of all this knowledge about what the world was going to do with your creations and work?

Can you honestly tell me, just now, that you have any idea what the hell is your legacy or reputation as an artist, or even what your art is known for, going to look like in a decade or two from now? And that things aren't going to get weirder than they are now?

I find that fact both frightening and strangely assuring at points, and exciting above all.

#replies tag #ytp #youtube poop #sonic #long john baldry #dr robotnik #kfad2 #silvagunner #iteachvader #raxxo #tf2 #sfm

[lilover131]

Chapter 55 Thoughts

It’s been a while since I’ve taken the time to actually write down my reactions and thoughts about a chapter, but after a agonizing 3 month wait for a new chapter, I had a lot of time to think about a lot of things. The final day was certainly the most difficult, and I slept horribly trying to wait for this chapter to come out (it’d be nice if companies could regularly list like....a release time on a certain date so people aren’t literally refreshing the page every 5 minutes to see if it’s up. Or at least have some consistency!). My lack of sleep and constant thoughts about CCS though did manage to stir another CCS related dream, which I will talk about in a separate post. 

But hot damn was this chapter worth the wait! It certainly wasn’t what I expected, but it was really great in a lot of ways! 

ANYWAYS, I’ve rambled enough. My thoughts on this chapter are below the cut! 

So I will start off by praising the hell out of Sakura for her quick thinking in using SIEGE. That was definitely a wow moment for me and really shows her growth as a magic user and as a person honestly. This action not only spoke to her skill but also to how quick thinking she is in such an uncertain situation. Surely, having never had any reason to doubt Kaito or question his abilities before, It is almost unbelievable that she managed to think of that and do that in the mere seconds she had to respond after Syaoran made his accusation of Kaito. I’ve noticed as of late that her instincts in particular seem to be really really on point. She starting to trust herself and her feelings, and because of this, she is able to act without hesitation, and I have a feeling that is  going to be extremely vital later on. 

Sakura starts off by asking the real important questions and things I would ask myself in her shoes having just met another magic user, especially one with unclear intentions like Kaito. She seemed like she was studying him to gauge him and the reasons for his actions or what he might do. What intrigues me about this part is she first asks him if he knows about her being able to use cards. He answers with a simple “Yes”. But when she asks about if he knows about Syaoran, his answer is far less simple, and that might potentially be telling. Kaito stated that he knows Syaoran to be a “extremely gifted sorcerer” and “the next head of the Li clan”. Now, perhaps I’m overthinking this, but he could have just answered ‘yes’ like he did with Sakura, but instead he listed specific details about him that shows Sakura he has done his research and knows a lot about him. Now, we already knew that he had this information of course, but why does he want Sakura to know this in that moment? I’m fascinated by this and what he was trying to tell Sakura by telling her he had this sort of knowledge. Additionally, why is it that when it pertains to Syaoran, Kaito behaves so much differently than he does with anyone else? I’ll probably delve into that in another post, but I have some theories on that. 

After making this statement, Sakura and Kaito exchange some meaningful looks, though it’s unclear what the both of them are thinking in that moment. Sakura turns to look back at Akiho and Syaoran and appears nervous, like she’s concerned about something (I have a theory to that as well, but I’ll leave that for another time). Then, Sakura mentions Momo and asks where she went, indicating that she has not forgotten about the other person around earlier. Sakura seems to really be evaluating her situation with these questions she’s asking, but unbeknownst to her, Momo has been cut off from her tv drama and is pouting in the mansion. hahahaha! 

Momo, while upset that she can’t see what’s going on anymore, praises Sakura for her for her quick thinking and mentions that neither she or Akiho’s mother accurately predicted how powerful Sakura would become. The implications of this are unknown as it is unclear what they are trying to stop to begin with. 

The scene changes back to Kaito and Sakura’s ‘standoff’, and Kaito states that Sakura cannot stay hidden in SIEGE’s field forever. I believe he was trying to stir a reaction and speed things up as probably the longer he has his time spell up, the more it affects his body, so he cannot afford to waste any more time. In what appears to be his way of showing desperation (at least in my opinion), he points his staff in Syaoran’s direction and threatens Sakura by stating that “He will make the first move” if she won’t. My jaw dropped a this, and though I don’t believe he actually had any intentions of hurting Syaoran, just the implications and threat of it was enough to make my blood boil. Lmao. 

BUT ONCE AGAIN, SAKURA IS QUEEN and reacts ridiculously fast to protect her man and uses one of her newest cards, TRANSFER, to switch places with Kaito and....well...she put him in a box. Hahahaha!! Seeing Kaito all crammed in that small space inside of SIEGE was honestly so satisfying and it was nice to see him on the losing side for once. I can’t imagine he was happy about it either. He’s used to things going his way, and in this particular venture, it has been anything but. 

However, this unfortunately also becomes Sakura’s downfall. By switching places with him, she put herself out of the protection she had before and was now affected by Kaito’s time magic. She managed to take a few steps, running towards Syaoran, before she ultimately was stopped. Kaito makes mention of her progress. When you think about it, she’s gone from being able to move a pinky to moving as far as she did this time, so it’s a significant growth. 

He goes on to talk, though it’s unclear if Sakura could hear him at all, about a phrase Akiho had learned in her Japanese dictionary one time about “growing leaps and bounds”. He seemed lost in a memory where Akiho spoke of how she wished to improve her Japanese so she could become even better friends with Sakura and the others, and how happy she looked when she spoke of this. Honestly, this sentiment from Akiho is super relatable and resonated with me. I am fortunate to have so many friends in so many different parts of the world, and I absolutely love learning about their cultures and words of their native language so that I can become closer to them. But what also makes this moment so meaningful is that in this particular moment, Kaito is thinking about Akiho and her smile. One may wonder “Why is he saying this right now?”, but it really does display how much Akiho is on his mind and how much he cares about her and his reasons for doing all of this. 

Shortly after saying this, he seems to be in pain again, showing once again the deterioration of his body the more he uses time magic, and it seems clear that he really is getting closer to his own demise. He even says as much when he pleads to Sakura to please make the card he needs soon, before he runs out of time. I don’t think he’s necessarily displaying a will to live or anything yet, but more a “I have to get this done before I perish, or it will all be for nothing”. 

Disappointingly, time is rewound once again, and he takes it back to before he and Akiho decided on a location for their outing. @meimi-haneoka​ mentioned this, and I agree with her, but he could have rewound to any point in time and could have completely undone their entire day, but he chose to still have that outing with her anyways. It was a conscious choice he made, though he quite casually made sure they changed the choice of location (for obvious reasons). Lmao!!! 

Now we get to the really exciting part. So after Kaito rewound time, I gave a big sigh and thought “Well, here we go again”, but something was very different this time. Sakura’s serious expression standing in her hallway said it all, and she suddenly grabbed her phone from her purse and called Syaoran, saying “We need to talk. It’s important”. 

So Syaoran, being the most adorable worried boyfriend he is, runs into her house literally in the next panel and immediately asks if Sakura is okay. I can imagine that he probably ran the entire way to her house too, and it’s just so wholesome I can’t even. It’s crazy how well CLAMP shows the strength of their love just through small actions like these, and it really is a work of art with its subtleties. 

Kero and Suppi have not been told why Sakura’s behaving so seriously, as she was waiting for Syaoran to get there first, but soon enough she tells them all at once about how she remembers using SIEGE at the botanical garden. This understandably confuses Syaoran, since in his mind they haven’t even gone there yet. But, she goes on to explain that she remembers using SIEGE, but more importantly that she remembers seeing Kaito using magic. This is HUGE. Not only is this progress (have we finally gotten out of rewind hell?), but this means that Sakura likely will not be nearly as affected by any time magic in the future. And if Kaito cannot make her forget about him using magic, that makes every action he does in the future very precarious. It’s unclear what the implications are of this revelation, but it’s going to entirely change how she reacts around Kaito, perhaps how she reacts around Akiho, and the dialogue she has with Syaoran. Syaoran should theoretically be able to talk to her now about Kaito and what he’s done so far and what they know, and I’m so so curious to see what Sakura will do with this knowledge. Will she be upset? Will she be mad? Certainly she won’t be happy to know that Kaito’s been forcibly keeping Syaoran silent, but Sakura is a forgiving person in nature, so it’s hard to say what she’ll do. 

Anyways, this chapter was incredible and I cannot wait to see how this develops from now on. I have a feeling things are going to get real intense here soon now that Kaito can’t control things like he’s been doing a majority of the series. Things are definitely different now, and honestly it’s about fucking time. 

#cardcaptor sakura #clear card #chapter 55 #spoilers #chrissy talks a lot #theories #analyzation #summary #thoughts #kaito #sakura #syaoran #akiho #momo #manga #clamp

[ladyyatexel]

I Went On A Manga Binge

So you don't have to

For those of you who have wisely avoided the shreds of it I've left around the blog thus-far, I had some weird notion to go re-experience Yu-Gi-Oh uuuuuh a week ago? We'll go with that. Time is meaningless.

I'd been able to read a good portion of the early manga at the end of highschool, and somewhere in my stacks and stacks of paper is fanart from this dark time, so you know I cared. I also still own a Dark Magician action figure somehow, so. I'd also watched a large portion of the anime with my brother because it had been laced with some kind of crack and we couldn't look away? I remember when we both were just like shit, wait, don't change the channel, I can't stop looking at it. And the next thing we knew we were waiting for new episodes and I was doing research on the Japanese original because I was that kid.

Anyway, unnecessary backstory out of the way, here are some... let's call them Observations and Consequences of having read somewhere in the neighborhood of 300 chapters (and growing) of a manga primarily hinged on card games from a spectrum of sources ranging from boringly lawful to sketchy as fuck.

Surprise actual character that develops in typical shounen fashion being Jounouchi. My limited experiences with the 4Kids dub and only early manga had not painted him in a particularly good light. I don't know if episodes were being aired out of order or if I had just missed the ones that established that he was making shit up as he was going along, but Wow I liked him a lot more going through the manga than I ever did watching the (dubbed, heavily edited and censored and thrown into a slurry machine) anime. I'd managed to come out with the impression that he was just as reasonably experienced with the game as Yugi back in the day. Wild.

I'm now reading every single comic-style post on Tumblr backwards.

Striking inverse to first point, wow, I don't like Seto Kaiba. Though he gets points for his general philosophy of the future, and the line I read in my sketchy online combo of scans and scanlations in which he said, "If God is in your way, you run him down," was Metal As Fuck. I somewhat shame-facedly admit to enjoying him a lot more as an Abridged Series character. (I watched Abridged as it came out back in the day! The experience of watching the anime with my brother had been so fresh that I got all the in jokes about the way things were edited and dubbed, it was great. Series remains influential part of my life to this day, which is hella weird.)

I almost understand how Duel Monsters works now. I don't want this.

That said, wow a lot of the decisions made in the anime made everything a lot more ridiculous than the admittedly already ridiculous original. I got the distinct feeling in the manga that the Duelist Kingdom stuff we were seeing was designed to be used and exploited in ways that don't make sense in an actual cardgame just played on a table like a normal person and this was part of testing everyone to think higher, differently. Maybe this is obvious to everyone already, I don't know. I had always liked that it was very, 'Not so fast, I'm going to blow up the moon to change the tides,' but I'm not really sure the anime gave enough explanation that this was an extra layer added to things for that event? You can see people actively getting used to it in the books, and people who aren't considering the real or 3D nature of it getting owned, but my memory of anime version is everyone just like, 'oh, shucks, fuck me, I forgot to consider the phase of the moon before i played this card, can't believe I forgot.' No one calls Yugi on any of this stuff because it's valid play in that situation. Plus Yami Yugi had mad trickster energy in the beginning and it suited him to think of ways to do things inside these little simulation boxes the way it suited him to set perverts on fire. I imagine the real card game trying to emulate this element as something that would be to its detriment, but I neither know nor particular care haha

Ryou Bakura.

Really, though. I think he became kind of casualty of 'wow, we have a lot of characters who really aren't able to do anything in this story anymore,' despite the fact that his whole inner life could have been as interesting as Yugi's. I always like thinking about the possibilities of stories in which main character falls into magical world and is given magical item and told they're the hero and then they find out they've been the bad guy the whole time. The first several volumes of manga were about the quiet weirdo kid that no one talked to who was always blacking out and turning into a fucked up version of himsef because he was so attached to his ancient Egyptian jewelry, so like, Bakura could have much the same shit going on. I want to know what's happening with him so much. He clearly doesn't love being possessed, but he's also so drawn to the ring. Despite it having stabbed him at least twice and him knowing it's a danger to him and his friends, he keeps being pulled back into it. You see so much more of him being like, 'Oooh, a creepy thing, I love that! :D' in the manga than ever in the anime, which I'm all about. Also more blood. I'm very about that as well. Though my memory of the anime also made it look very much like normal regular daily Bakura was just a weird facade in places before he ever would have been. I think that was it trying to compensate for what people didn't see from the Toei anime, but okay whatever, that I love everything about this guy is not news, I don't need to talk about Bakura excessively here, I'm pretty sure that's gonna show up on my blog by itself

On a related note though, damn, more of these people need to talk to each other. Can we have some existential crisis support clubs or something. Can we get like some apologies or something? "I respect you as a duelist." "Cool, but you literally built a tower designed to specifically assassinate me and my friends? You were supposed to get Better after I retaliated by putting you in a coma, but you kinda didn't." "Why would the coma have made it better" "I just told you it didn't" ---- "Sorry I went along with the plan of your evil parasite stabbing you, misled you, and then also jumped in and took up some real estate in your head too." "I understand, I also have an evil thing inside me that does things while I'm blacked out." "...no, I was conscious for all of that." "Oh." "..." "..." "..." "Do you like Ouija Boards?" "sure okay" ETC. Like damn we are reading shounen manga because no one is talking extensively about their feelings here and I'm tapping my foot angrily.

Holy shit there are so many mythologies happening at once. The ancient family guarding the Egyptian Pharaoh has a surname that's a Mesopotamian goddess. None of the god cards make any Egyptian sense except Ra, and just like. Baaarrrrely. Somewhere either Evil Ring Bakura or Mar/lik makes a reference to cremation and spirits being taken to heaven with smoke which several things, but definitely not Ancient Egyptian. Marik/Malik meanwhile is clearly trying to head Arabic, along with Rishid, but then, hey, our sister is just Isis. Goddess McGoddess. Sometimes they're the same goddess! Her name could be Isis Isis or Ishtar Ishtar. Meanwhile, all the obviously 'occult because Christians think it is freaky' stuff. ~ancient egyptian pentagrams~~~This isn't a complaint, I guess so much as a 'Wow, I can kind of see the cultural spot the author was coming from and where he was aiming' kind of thing.

Wonder where things would have gone if the card games had not been latched onto the way they were.

Managed to forget how gross the pre-cardgames stuff was on the sexual harassment front. I'm glad there was a sort of explanation of everyone drifting away from being dick heads and that that decision was made. It got way more comfortable to read after no one was bringing Yugi p*rn on VHS.

Yugi looks better with a nose, glad we got that upgrade.

Interesting to watch the series style shift as it goes away from being horror to being over the top cardgames and friendship (with blood!). The first picture of Mokuba is fucking Jarring. Also noticed that the nicer a character is, the less their teeth are defined.

Glad manga did not go as completely off the fucking the rails about Marik's face. I never got as far as seeing him back in the day because college occurred, but I remember seeing pictures and stuff and being like, "what in the Fuck happened to that dude, I think the house style has collapsed in on itself"

Things the author Really Likes: motorcycles, belts, SHOES, holy shit the shoes. These are some of the most lovingly rendered sneakers I've ever seen. All the detail on his characters goes straight to their feet and then it's stretched upward until it forms stiff peaks. Gently fold in 3000 years of trauma and bake face down in a crumb coat of scattered mythology. Remove when you roll two zeros.

Where the fuck am I going to put the extremely large omnibus volumes of this comic I purchased in order to balance out how much I would be reading for free on the internet. I should have grasped that a three in one edition would be Thick and yet somehow I was still :O when it arrived. Have I strategically purchased volumes that contain my favorite parts, maybe, what's it to you will i eventually get the whole thing because incomplete book series gnaw on my soul? yes

Wish the transition from "I've murdered several people in delightfully karmic ways" to "all you need is friendship in your heart and cards in your hand" Yami Yugi/Pharaoh had been discussed more/transitioned better. Buddy, where did you get this approved for television high horse? Please go back to strangling people with yo-yos or at least tell me why you stopped.

I still can't tell anything that looks like a big robotic monster apart from any other big robotic monster. My dude, I can't tell cars apart, all these monsters look the same.

Yami Yugi fascinated me way more in highschool? Maybe because it was still super early and the anime was like 'we need to torture you about his origins WeEkLy. Now I'm just like 'wait hold on, can we go back to Bakura and Marik for a minute, there's some extreme unpacking to do here?' Those two are paying so much more in baggage fees here my guy wow

Violently uninterested in any of the spinoff media

#yugioh #yu gi oh #ygo #there you go i can't imagine any other way you would decide was necessary to tag this #perhaps now that i have thrown this up i can #something #i don't know how i was going to finish that sentence #shut up lady

[third-generation-female-warrior]

Hidden

So, I decided to maybe do a multi-chapter fic of what Talbott and Alexus were up to during the Second Wizarding War (but it could end up being a one-shot). I don't have too many plans, so I'm hoping I can keep it up. It may get a little more mature than what I've written before, never anything explicit, so far it's a T rating. Lots of romantical language, some dueling, writing the first bit felt a lot like writing quarantine, so take with that what you will.

Chapter 1

Sometimes, on quiet rainy nights, while laying in bed, Talbott Winger would reflect fondly upon the last few years of his life. He was still a young man, only twenty-four-years-old. Some would say the prime of life. He looked down at the woman laying down with him, and kissed her forehead, remembering the last few years, remembering how he was lucky enough to be living with her.

He had graduated from Hogwarts with her in 1991, and he wasted no time moving into a flat in London with his girlfriend of three years: Alexus Johnson. He continued his auror career while she had set up a private investigative office, occasionally working as a hit-witch for his department.

Working young kids, that’s what they were, tripping over themselves in the bliss of freedom, no teachers or dark cabals constantly looming over their heads. Just them, in their space, with their combined book collection.

They continued dating for another couple years until 1995, a year that Talbott reflected upon fondly as he noticed her eyes fluttering from a dream.

That was the year he had proposed to her. In a wheat field, under a large shady tree, when they were on a picnic together, he pulled her favorite book out of the basket and told her to find a story for him to read.

She turned to a marked page, a custom bookmark pressed between the pages of her favorite romantic poem. Embossed in blue lettering was the question he wanted to ask her.

“Will you marry me?”

By the time she processed the bookmark and looked at him for answers, he was already on one knee, an open box with his ring in his hands, held up to her.

They had a small ceremony, a few months later, only their closest friends and her mother and brother were in attendance. They didn’t need or want a big spectacle. All he wanted was to dance with his wife, and he did, for the whole night.

It was 1997 now, and he considered himself the luckiest wizard in the world. He loved her, he didn’t want to lose her.

He loved her, and there was a war right outside their door.

Instead of being stable and safe at their London flat, they were in a safe house.

He loved his wife, but she was rather prone to being targeted by large groups of dark wizards.

Granted, this time, as with his work serving under Alastor “Mad-Eye” Moody in the auror department, Talbott himself had been targeted as the Death Eaters took over the Ministry.

Mad-Eye had been killed just over two months ago, during a big confrontation involving Harry Potter and a bunch of Death Eaters, and a few weeks after, there was a wedding for Bill Weasley.

Alexus, still being a good friend with her the eldest Weasley, had attended with Talbott.

They were attacked while there, and that was when they went into hiding, apparating to their flat to grab the bags they had packed in advance before leaving, on a muggle bus, to a train station.

From that station, they made their way to some distant station before apparating again.

Somewhere in Ireland, Talbott didn’t know the exact location. An old villa in the countryside with rolling hills to the right, as far as they could see, and a thick forest to the left of the home, her father’s childhood home, apparently. She and Jacob inherited it when he died.

It was modest, with a lush flower garden in the front, and a greenhouse in the back, a small village within a bike ride’s distance for when they needed groceries.

Most importantly, it had a library, a record player, and a radio.

The days passed slowly, the sun rose over the hills and set behind the trees.

To pass the time, they read, they danced, they cooked, they tended to the garden and greenhouse. Only sparingly did they venture to the village together, for being in sight of other people increased their risk of being sighted.

Today had included a trip to the village. It started off a sunny day, brilliant blue skies as they walked the markets in the center of the place. By the time they were leaving, fresh groceries in their arms, the dark clouds were rolling through the skys.

They had rushed home, just barely avoiding getting caught in the downpour. Alexus found the whole scenario hilarious. Rainy weather always made her feel better, and after dinner, she played music on the muggle device that she called a record player, some relic that belonged to her grandparents.

Talbott hadn’t really heard music like this before, but it was fascinating nonetheless. So, they danced that night, for a long time.

It was enough to leave Alexus properly tired by the time they were heading to bed, so she had fallen asleep in minutes, laying her head on his chest instead of the pillows.

He read his book with one hand, keeping his other arm around her. It was an old one, a collection of an author’s favorites that Alexus had gotten him for his 16th birthday.

The pages were well preserved, some passages underlined, the ink from their own pens fading.

He traced his thumb over a neat line, knowing it was Alexus who had marked it. He sighed and marked his spot before setting the book on his nightstand.

He turned off his light and gently moved, just slow enough so that he didn’t disturb his wife. He laid down and closed his eyes, letting the lullaby of the raindrops tapping on the window sooth him to sleep.

When the sun filtered in from the bedroom window, Talbott threw the blankets over his head.

“You have to get up eventually,” his wife’s chiding voice came from outside the covers.

“No I don’t,” he called back, a smile creeping onto his lips.

“We’re going to the forest, remember? To explore beyond the yard?”

He felt the weight of the bed shift, the springs in the mattress squeaking as she sat down at the foot.

He relented and sat up, pulling the covers off of his face.

She looked at him, with her big round eyes, misleadingly innocent, a soft smile on her lips. She was already dressed, wearing simple blue jeans and a long-sleeved blue shirt, her hair tied back into a bun, two strands of hair framing either side of her face.

“There you are,” she said, a glint of mischief taking its place in her eyes.

“Here I am,” he repeated before lifting his arms into a powerful stretch, extending his entire upper torso, a yawn accenting his movements.

“Get ready, I’ll be downstairs,” she said, leaning over the bed to peck his cheek before sliding off the bed and walking out.

Now, he really had no choice. He couldn’t keep his wife waiting.

He reflected on their predicament as he got ready for the day. They were treating it like a second honeymoon. If any bystander that they met asked, they were on vacation from two demanding jobs.

Vacation, he mentally repeated as he examined his face in the mirror. A small beard was developing, he hadn’t shaved in a few weeks. Everyone I know could be killed by now, and I’m on vacation. He shook his head to rapidly clear those thoughts. He couldn’t let his mind go down that direction. They were just as safe as he and Alexus.

He ran his hands through his hair, letting it fall where it may before he exited the bathroom, fully dressed. He wore khakis and a grey t-shirt, simple enough, but durable for a walk in the woods. Lastly, from his closet, he grabbed a dark jacket and threw it over his shoulder before making his way downstairs.

Alexus was in the kitchen, reaching through one of the cupboards to grab plates.

Talbott took the opportunity to look over what she was preparing. Bacon on one burner, scrambled eggs on another. He looked at the counter, to see bread in the toaster.

He turned the eggs before kissing the back of her head, reaching above her to grab the plates that were just at the brush of her fingertips.

“What would you do without me?” he said, almost teasingly.

“Get a step-ladder.”

He laughed as two pieces of toast popped up. She quickly took them out and added another slice. He started to prep their coffee.

It wasn’t too long before they sat down at the little table in a dining nook.

While they ate, Alexus was looking through a book of botany, one hand balancing the spine on the table and flicking through the pages, the other holding her fork and messing with eggs that she kept forgetting to actually eat.

He watched her read, her brow furrowing in concentration, her emerald eyes blocked only slightly by her reading glasses, lips slightly parted and occasionally mouthing words, eggs hovering an inch off her plate, occasionally dropping off the fork balanced between her two fingers.

“I thought we banned reading at the breakfast table for this reason,” Talbott remarked casually, snapping her out of her trance.

“Sorry,” she muttered, quickly marking her spot and setting it to the side before she started eating.

“Find anything interesting in the book?” he asked, trying to keep a conversation.

“Well, nothing in particular,” she started, stirring her coffee slightly. Talbott waited for her to finish drinking, knowing that she was about to dump a niche patch of information on him.

“But I just think,” she continued, setting her mug down, “It’s interesting, there’s botany, the study of non-magical plants, but there’s also herbology, which is for magical plants, but there’s also a certain overlap in their medicinal and magical uses.”

He nodded slightly, watching her ramble. The topic she was discussing was rather interesting, but he always found her info-dumping made it more compelling.

“Like, dittany,” she said after a breath. “In herbology and potion making, it’s very powerful for healing purposes, but muggles know about dittany, it’s not just a magical plant. For them, it’s medicinal, ornamental, symbolic of love, used for culinary and perfumery purposes.”

“And?” he asked, encouraging her to state her real point, knowing that her tangent was merely a method of building context to set up her point.

“Why doesn’t someone publish a book containing both muggle and magical herbs?” she asked.

He frowned, biting the inside of his cheek as he thought. “That’s an excellent proposal,” he said, “I suppose we could.”

She tilted her head. “We?” she repeated.

“Well, yes. We’re both talented at Herbology, plus with all the books we read on gardening and other botanical research, we’d both be qualified enough.” He shrugged before taking the last bite of his toast.

She nodded before she continued eating. He could see the gears turning in her head.

She remained deep in thought even when they both finished breakfast and were walking out the door, heading left to enter the forest. There was a fog rolling over the hills and the forest floor, Talbott knew, was caused by the hot October sun evaporating the cold, wet air leftover from last night’s rain. It created a certain ambience as they walked along the natural pathway, the light of the sun breaking through the red and orange canopy and catching on the omnipresent mist.

The forest was cold, almost a biting chill, the shade of the trees only adding to that cold.

Talbott reached for her hand, and they walked together, keeping close for warmth.

There was a natural pathway to the forest, nothing paved, no stepping stones. Just a clearing of trees.

“What do you think we’ll find out here?” Talbott asked after a second of walking, the villa no longer visible behind them.

“Other than memories?” Alexus contemplated his answer, “My father, he wrote some poetry about this place. He called it Sunset Forest. I remember he described finding groves of berry bushes, small streams flowing into ponds, rabbits.”

“I didn’t know he was a poet,” Talbott said.

“Only in his spare time. That’s what my mum would tell me. He kept journals and filled them with poetry, ever since he was young. She gave me a box full of them for my 13th birthday.”

She let go of his hand to jump over a large branch that had fallen in the path. Talbott stepped over it and looked up, hearing a persistent little hammering on a tree trunk, knowing it was a woodpecker.

“Do you still have his journals?” he asked, looking back at her.

“Most of them,” she replied, reaching for his hand. “Jacob took some of his more… contemporary and political stuff. Apparently, he went through a phase, from what I could tell.”

Talbott laughed. “How so?”

“Well, in the journals from his early adult years, they were mostly about society and war.”

“Ah,” he nodded in understanding. He knew Alexus had a small dislike for contemporary poetry, especially when they were about war.

She believed that every good story deserved a love, whether it be a tragedy or a happy ending.

“I also brought a few journals with me, to the villa,” she muttered. “I know we were only supposed to pack essential things, but I just wanted-”

“You don’t have to make excuses to please me,” he quickly assured her. “I understand, it’s important to you.”

She stopped in her path, making him stop with her. “Would you like to hear some? I memorized a couple about this forest.”

“I would love to,” he assured her.

She hummed a bit, leaning against his arm as she thought, mentally searching her internal catalog of poetry. For a second, it was quiet, with just her humming and the sound of yellow leaves and twigs being crushed under foot.

“Okay,” she said finally, “This one is called La Bruja de Rosa. He wrote it after my mum told him she was a witch. His response was to propose to her.”

Talbott laughed again as she cleared her throat.

“Smoothed down by the steps Of the many men that have taken this road Before my first breath This forestry path with the stories untold

My story is mine My head is mine My heart is yours La bruja de rosa

Mi bruja de rosa, I walk this path Guided by your spell From my childhood villa To a love meant to last Oh, the story this ground could tell

Magical in the way you take my breath Oh, enchantress of my soul! Meet me at Gaia’s archway, for apart for me, is living death but together, I am whole

You are my other half On the Sunset Forest path, A compliment to me my flying rose, I offer you my prose and the villa To build our own castillo To last for years But only if You’ll say “yes” My dear”

Talbott let out a breath as she finished. “That was nice,” he muttered.

“My mother’s maiden name was Espartero-Rosales. Espartero was her mother’s last name, the one tied with my magical side of the family. But Rosales, it means “rose bush,” so there was a lot of rose symbolism in his poetry after he met her,” she explained.

“Espartero,” he repeated, humming a bit before a thought struck him. This time, he froze in his path, causing her to look back at him.

“Wait,” he looked at her, “Like, the Espartero family in Mexico?”

“Did I not mention that before? I mean, you know my mom was in both the European and Mexican Quidditch Hall of Fa-”

“You told me she played for Spain!”

“Yeah, she played for the Leona Madrid team after playing for the Mexican World Cup team!”

“You never told me you came from the most influential family in developing Herbology research!”

She started laughing as she turned to him. He wasn’t angry, it was more than likely shock manifesting in him.

She placed her hands on his chest and smoothed out his jacket. “Yes, that is my close family, yes, I keep in touch with them, and yes, we can visit them.”

She stood on her toes and kissed his cheek. “Satisfied?”

He gently wrapped his arms around her waist. “Very.”

She cupped his face into her hands and brushed his cheek with her right thumb before standing on her toes to kiss him on the lips, just for a second.

He moved one hand, placing it over hers to hold it in place as he turned his head to kiss her palm.

She smiled, staring up at him. “I love you, and we will get through this. Both of us. I promise,” she assured him.

“I will never let anything happen to us,” he murmured.

She looked into his eyes, that brilliant crimson, the sharpness of his intellect just as alluring as the day she met him, even now, after everything.

They had been married for a good two years, and it all passed like a dream for her. From the moment he got down on one knee, to when they were running home to grab their pre-packed luggage to escape Death Eaters.

He made life a dream for her, still, even in hiding, where they were the only two people in the world. He gave poems and stories she had memorized for years a new life. He gave her motivation when she had none. Hope when she was hopeless. Love when she needed it.

He was a dream for her, still, even after knowing each other for ten years. She loved him as easily as she did when they were younger, it was breathing to her.

But she was being greedy and she knew it. Neither two years nor ten was not enough for her.

She wanted so much more, she wanted what she vowed to: life. After all the danger she ran into headfirst as a youth, she knew life was not promised to her. Not when there was danger still chasing her, when she was awake, and in the dark nights where her dreams left her gasping in a cold sweat, reaching for him, depending on him to be the rock to anchor her back to reality.

Those were terrible nights, when she would sit up, in tears, trying to understand, trying to make sense of why everything she held dear was so fragile. Everyone she loved, they could be gone in a flash, and she didn’t understand it, she couldn’t understand why.

Why did so many things threaten to rip her friends and family from her hands? Why could she never escape the mysteries, the curses? She never wanted any of it, never wanted a reputation for breaking curses, defeating evil. She never wanted the things that threatened to rip Talbott from her hands. She just wanted him. She wanted to be there for him so much, it physically hurt. It was an ache in her chest, a lack of breath in her lungs.

She loved him too much, and she was being greedy because of it.

She loved him and just wanted a life with him. But the war outside the villa was just another thing that threatened to steal him from her.

She was going to spend her whole life with him; she was certain of that fact. What terrified her was how little time that could be. Three minutes, three days, three months. None of it was certain.

Nothing was promised to Alexus, except Talbott.

She stood back up on her toes and kissed him again, he leaned down so she didn’t have to strain so much.

She was so warmed by him, by his hands exploring her, by his lips moving against her own, until a bitter chill swept through a forest, a rustling wind shaking the trees.

Alexus pulled away, shivering, pulling her jean jacket closer around her.

She would have passed it off as a simple October breeze, until everything quieted, the sounds of the forest, the rustling of the leaves, the sounds of animals in the distance, it all went mute. The shadows of the trees grew longer, the sunlight disappearing, the fog taking a much more sinister presence now, heralding a threat, just lurking outside their field of vision. The only thing she heard was Talbott’s own shuddering breath, which puffed out like white smoke from his mouth.

In her stomach, a pit of dread was lodged, making her unsettled.

“T-Talbott,” she whispered through chattering teeth.

He pulled out his wand, she followed suit, and they moved to stand back-to-back.

She watched the fog, until she saw what she was looking for. A hooded figure, looming in the banks, gliding across the forest floor.

“Dementor!” she called before waving her wand, remembering her wedding night, the happiness she felt when Talbott slid the ring on her finger. A patronus of a coyote bounded from the tip and sprang in front of her, rushing at the dementor, sending it away before it could get closer.

“This way too!” Talbott called, another dementor appearing.

She turned on her heel, her and Talbott switching spots as the coyote ran, chasing away the second one.

Immediately, the air cleared, the soft October breeze rustled the canopy, the morning sun returned, even the fog seemed to fade now.

She expelled the patronus and looked at Talbott. “We have to leave, that wasn’t a coincidence,” she whispered, grabbing his hand and pulling him back down the forest path.

They ran to the villa, stumbling over tree trunks and branches, sliding on the golden leaves still wet with morning dew.

Alexus ran into the villa first, but the second she was through the door, a powerful blast sent her flying back, colliding into Talbott, sending him back as well, both of them rolling across the grassy lawn.

“Damn,” Alexus groaned, moving to stand up, clutching her stomach.

“Are you alright?” Talbott asked, sitting up,

“Fine,” she assured him, sliding her wand back into her hand. “But whoever just hit me with a jinx is going to be sorry.”

He pulled out his wand as well and stood up as a wizard, a snatcher, by the looks of his ratty robes, strolled out of the home.

“I wouldn’t try it, Johnson, we’ve got you surrounded,” he drawled casually.

There was a series of snaps as several other snatchers apparated in a circle around Talbott and Alexus.

“Johnson-Winger, I’m a married woman,” Alexus corrected, standing up. “And, I like my odds.”

She did a once-over, glancing over her shoulders, that was all she needed to do, Talbott was aware of that fact. All she needed was one look to gain an accurate account of where everyone was in relation to her own position.

Talbott dove for the ground as she waved her wand in a circle around her head, fire billowing out in a ring around them, pushing the Snatchers away from them.

Standing up, turning on his heel, Talbott fired hex after hex around him, nailing four of the seven snatchers in the chest, sending them down.

“Go inside, I got them!” Alexus called as she sent a particularly nasty hex at the most physically imposing thug.

Talbott ran inside, Alexus standing against two snatchers, both of them holding up their wands.

“Neat trick, Johnson,” the leader said, still standing.

“I’ve had a good amount of practice, didn’t they tell you my background?”

“Why do you think we brought so many?”

With that, they both snapped their wands forward, Alexus stepping to the side, dodging a glaring red jinx, but the second spell had her wand flying out of her hand, landing in the thick grass somewhere behind her.

“Damn,” she whispered before looking back at them.

“No wand, no magic,” the second one said.

Alexus planted one foot behind herself and aimed her hand forward.

She jerked her hand, red sparks shooting from her palm, colliding with the second-in-command, sending him flying back, unconscious.

“Ever heard of wandless magic?” Alexus asked as she turned to the last wizard. “Got any more tricks up your sleeve?”

He lowered his wand.

There was a shift behind Alexus, but before she could react, a pair of thick arms wrapped around her and lifted her up, pinning her arms to her sides.

She responded by slamming her head back as hard as she could into the person’s nose, prompting them to drop her. While they were occupied, she grabbed their wrist and arm, pulling it over her shoulder while hooking her foot behind his ankle, lifting him up enough to flip him over his shoulder.

She kept his arm in her hands, twisting it when he landed on his back, while placing her foot on his chest, keeping him pinned. There was a snapping noise, which was probably his shoulder, and he was yelling.

Alexus, satisfied, jumped back as the initial snatcher tried to hex her.

She quickly retreated, moving behind a snatcher who was slowly climbing to his feet. She grabbed this one by the front of his shirt and hoisted him up to his feet before turning around, using him as a shield, the lead snatcher’s hex hitting his back instead of her, forcing her to drop him as he went dead limp.

She grabbed his wand and ignored its hostile energy as she pointed it forward, right as the lead snatcher was about to hex her. They were at a draw, both ready to take each other out, but the question was, who would go first?

Alexus didn’t find out.

Before she could try, there was a small explosion at the wizard’s feet, sending him jumping back before Talbott sent another hex at him, pushing him back again.

Alexus, satisfied as her husband handled the last one, looked around the grass, running her hands through it before she found her hand.

She went around the other six snatchers and confounded them, casting obliviate on the conscious ones before taking all their wands and throwing them around the yard, some of them ending up in a pond. This would make it harder for them to find Talbott and Alexus again.

“Ready to go?” Talbott asked, holding their bags as she walked back to the house, the tent bundled at his feet.

She grabbed the tent and held it under one arm, placing her hand on his shoulder. “Ready,” she said before kissing his cheek.

With that, they disapparated away from the villa.

#hphm #hphm mc #hphm jacob's sibling #hphm talbott #talbott winger #jacob's sibling #talbott x jacob's sibling #talbott x mc #talbott winger x jacob's sibling #talbott winger x mc #acj writes #hphm talbott winger

[fandom-necromancer]

404 attraction not found

Had an idea in the shower. Had to write it. Enjoy!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900

‘Oh man, I’m not into men usually, but I’d definitely be gay for that one’, Chris laughed, admiring the person on the screen of the superhero movie they were watching currently. It was Friday evening: movie night. ‘God, he’s so hot, imagine his ass out of uniform!’ Gavin lifted his brows, studying the character and still not really seeing what Chris meant. The man looked over to them and laughed. ‘Come on, can’t be the only one!’ ‘Sorry, I’ve got the hots for the villain once again. She’s just too powerful not to love.’ ‘And you?’, Chris asked and nudged Gavin with his elbow. ‘Hmm? Yeah, same. Dude’s hot’, he answered. ‘Now keep it in your pants, haven’t seen this one yet! Wanna know what happens next.’ ‘Alright’, Chris chuckled and leaned back. Gavin did see how Tina side-eyed him knowingly, but chose to ignore it, hoping she wouldn’t address the topic in a misguided attempt to help.

They continued watching the movie, eating snacks and talking about anything that came to their mind. Tina got increasingly clingy the more she had drunken and as it had long become dark outside, Gavin decided to leave, driving her home. He thanked Chris and waved him goodbye at the door of his car. Their drive was silent until they stopped at a red light. ‘I’m sorry Gavin’, Tina lulled touching his elbow gently. ‘Maybe if you told him-‘ ‘Tina, it doesn’t bother me, okay?’, Gavin told her, maybe a bit too harsh. ‘And I’m really not in the mood to explain it yet again and hear all the same phrases over and over again. I can’t even complain or get mad about them, they are well meant. Phck. I will just continue to say what I’m supposed to say and it’s done with. Path of least resistance, as always. The reward really doesn’t justify the effort, okay?’ ‘Alright!’, Tina nodded, giving him a shaky thumbs-up. ‘My lips are sealed.’ ‘Thank you.’ ‘And what’s with Nines?’

Gavin frowned and looked over at her. ‘What’s with Nines?’ ‘You two. Anything going on?’ ‘How many times do I have to tell you? We are friends, Tina.’ ‘Are you sure?’ She smiled at him. ‘I’d say the tin-can has the hots for you.’ Gavin groaned. ‘Come on. Who the hell would want me? And hell, even if it were like that, I’ll deal with it if it happens someday, okay?’ ‘You don’t want to do anything about it? Are you interested?’ ‘Tina. I barely know the guy. I mean, sure, we spend a lot of time together. But that’s it. It’s difficult. I’m can’t know it like you seeing the girl of your dreams and drooling over how hot her thighs or something. I like him, I enjoy spending time with him. I could imagine living with him. That’s all.’ ‘Booooring.’ ‘Tina, I’m not existing to entertain you.’ ‘Still you do most of the days.’ ‘Then maybe you have a shitty sense of humour.’

Tina laughed and sat up. ‘Alright, you win, okay? Just know that if you want a relationship you deserve it.’ ‘Yeah, the hell I deserve it!’, Gavin sighed exasperated, gripping the steering wheel tighter. But who’s the poor phcker that deserves this, he added as an afterthought.

-

‘Hey, Gavin?’ The Detective looked up from his terminal to Nines who was standing next to him placing a coffee on his table. ‘Yeah?’ ‘Are you free on Monday?’ Gavin frowned. ‘Yeah, I should be, why?’ ‘I’d like to invite you out. I discovered a really nice restaurant that serves android food. Thought we could try it out?’ Gavin shrugged, already back to his report. ‘Yeah, sure. Would love to.’ He missed the way Nines beamed at that answer. It might have given him the push to realise Monday was the 14th February. Valentine’s day.

He only realised that the Sunday before as he contemplated what to wear. He immediately called Tina: ‘T, red alert! Tomorrow is Valentine’s day.’ ‘Yeah, I know. What’s up?’ ‘Well, Nines invited me to a restaurant tomorrow.’ ‘Oh, that’s nice! I’m happy for you!’ ‘Yeah, well I’m not!’, Gavin returned. ‘Is that a date?’ ‘Maybe? Could be. What did he tell you?’ ‘He just said it was a fancy restaurant that sells android food he wanted to try out.’ Tina sighed. ‘I don’t know then. Could very well be a date. With the day and all.’ ‘God, what if he’s interested?’, Gavin asked. ‘Tina, I will ruin it. The guy will hate me.’ ‘Why should he?’ ‘Because I will have to tell him I’m basically not interested!’ ‘But you are right?’, Tina dug deeper. ‘Yeah, but until I’ve explained him in what way I’m interested, he will already be disappointed!’ ‘Gavin’, his friend spoke up, reminding him to keep calm. ‘You are overthinking. Nines is pretty direct. Maybe this isn’t a date at all. And if it is, you have no way of predicting his reaction. All I know is that Nines is a very patient being. You should go.’ ‘Of course I will go, Tina. Phck, just know that after this is over, I will need a new partner.’

-

The restaurant really looked nice from where Gavin was sitting in his car. It had a modern feeling but lots of dark wood had been used inside that made it comfy and bordering to a touch dowdy. He could see the android sitting at a table at the far corner by the windows and he was sure he had already recognised his car. Gavin shouldn’t stay inside for long, but he couldn’t really bring himself to exit either. ‘It’s just you two meeting at a restaurant Gavin. You had been to the movies already. You had met to watch the boats pass on the river, for phcks sake! This is just another one of those things you do together. Don’t think too much!’ He pushed himself up and exited the car, locking it and pulling his clothes in order. Then he walked over, entered and quickly made his way over to Nines’ table.

‘Hello Gavin!’, the android greeted him. ‘Nice to see you.’ ‘Hi’, Gavin answered, sitting down. ‘Yeah, you too.’ ‘You look nice.’ Gavin swallowed and looked at the android. He didn’t wear a suit, but a nice white shirt with a blue tie. He was thankful he had picked something more presentable than his usual attire: A blue short-sleeved shirt and light blue jeans. ‘Err… you too.’ Damn, he was repeating himself.

‘I’m really interested in how this android food works’, Nines changed topics then, handing Gavin a menu. ‘I know it’s all a combination of Thirium and compounds we can break down in our filtering systems. But Connor loves it, he told me it actually has taste, even if it’s mostly messing with our analysing programs to achieve that.’ Gavin nodded. ‘Yeah, sounds cool. I mean, eating is nice, I guess.’ ‘I don’t know if I will like it, to be honest’, Nines shrugged. ‘I mean, we don’t need to eat and to a large part it’s just complications to clean afterwards. But You can share a meal with someone and I guess that’s the whole appeal for human android couples.’

Gavin didn’t want to look at Nines as he said that and instead let his eyes wander over the other people in the restaurant. A large – if not all of them – were indeed human android couples spending Valentine’s day together. Laughing at each other’s jokes, eating and toasting to the other. It made Gavin even more uncomfortable though. A fact that Nines picked up on immediately, of course. But before he could speak up, a waiter came up to them and saved Gavin from the conversation. Both of them ordered and waited until the waiter had disappeared. Gavin had hoped the android had forgotten, but instead Nines spoke up: ‘You are nervous.’ ‘Yeah, no shit, tin-can. Well, not nervous, but…‘ ‘But?’

Gavin sighed and looked at the android, who was returning his stare completely neutral. ‘Nines, what is this? You invited me out to a fancy restaurant on Valentine’s day. It could be you just wanted to try the food, but I’m afraid there’s more to it.’ Nines pulled a grimace, blushing. ‘There’s no fooling you, is there?’ He added a smile afterwards, but Gavin’s face fell. ‘I wanted to wait until after dinner, but of course, we can discuss it now too.’ Gavin rubbed his face in frustration. ‘Phck.’ ‘Gavin? Everything alright?’ The man looked up, then blew his cheeks. ‘Yeah.’ He dropped his hands. ‘Yes, please, what did you wanted to tell me?’ ‘I really enjoy your company’, Nines begun. ‘I actually don’t want to miss any day we were together. You are a fascinating human being and I admire your way of thinking. Your humour is… cute in its own way. I just wanted to tell you that…’ The android huffed. ‘Well, I guess I’ve beaten around the bush for long enough. I love you, Gavin.’

There it was. Gavin’s dream and at the same time worst nightmare. He wanted to be happy about it, but if he was being honest with himself, he couldn’t quite feel anything but despair. ‘Phck’, he sighed. ‘Excuse me?’ ‘Nines, I… Thank you’, Gavin began. ‘I really appreciate it, but… I don’t feel like you do.’ The android swallowed. ‘Oh. Oh, err… that’s okay, it’s totally fine, I’m sorry I said anything. I-‘ ‘Nines, stop. I’m bad at this. I do love you. Romantically. I just can’t love you the same way you love me.’ Nines cocked his head inquisitively. ‘What do you mean?’ ‘Does the word asexual say you something?’, Gavin whispered, feeling self-conscious about telling Nines something so personal in a space so public. ‘I’m- It’s basically not feeling sexual attraction towards someone.’ He looked up at Nines, afraid to see his disappointment. But the android was just sitting there, listening. ‘I can’t… I know someone’s beautiful, okay? Like this restaurant is nice, you look amazing, something like that. But there’s no sexy-sensor, basically. I’m not going around the city, seeing people and think I’d tap that, you understand?’

Nines nodded thoughtfully. ‘I think so. So there’s no particular feature of a person’s body you find attractive?’ ‘No’, Gavin nodded. ‘I mean, with time something could develop, but at first glance? Nah.’ ‘I’m sorry if this is intruding now’, the android began. ‘But you do have one-night stands every now and then, have you not?’ Gavin sighed. There it was. ‘Yeah, I have. Because sex is great. It feels nice and some days you simply feel the urge. But none of the persons I hooked up with I found particularly hot. They were just… people.’ ‘So you do like sex.’ ‘Yes, for phck’s sake!’

His call had startled the waiter coming over with their food, but Gavin just leaned back embarrassed, as the plates were put down and they mumbled their thanks to the waiter. ‘You had this conversation before, right?’, Nines spoke up gently as soon as the man had left them. Gavin just sighed and nodded. ‘Yeah. I’m not out to many, mostly because explaining something like that to others can be complicated. And it isn’t really worth the effort.’ ‘Then I thank you for telling me. I’m sorry for the inconvenience. I’m just fascinated. I thought it was an universal experience.’ He took up his fork and looked at the blue food on his plate, testing consistency. ‘Does this… Does this change anything in regard to what I told you?’ Gavin looked up from his plate. ‘What? I mean I should rather ask if that changes something for you, to be honest.’ The android shook his head. ‘No. I still love you. I mean I… To be honest I would really like to… spend the night with you? But if you don’t want that that’s… okay.’

The human sighed. ‘Okay, just to make it clear: I consider sex to be a gesture towards my partner. Like watching a movie with them I don’t know but they enjoy. It feels good and knowing your partner feels it too is… it’s nice, okay. I’m not abstinent, I just don’t find anyone attractive. That’s it.’ Nines smiled then. ‘Well it doesn’t change anything for me then. I still love you and would like to… deepen our relationship if you feel the same.’ ‘I… I would very much like that too’, Gavin smiled, unable to keep eye-contact with the android. ‘If you accept me despite what I’m missing.’ ‘You’re not-‘ ‘I am’, Gavin interrupted. ‘But it’s not a disadvantage. But I am missing something others have and that’s okay and I want to know you accept that.’ Nines blinked surprised. ‘Yes. Yes, I accept that.’

Gavin’s shoulders untensed and he finally took his first bite from the plate. The food was indeed amazing. ‘Then I’m sorry I made your date so awkward’, he chuckled. ‘Please, could you repeat what you’ve said?’ ‘What part? ‘The “I love you” part.’ Nines straightened his back and nodded. ‘I enjoy your company. You are fascinating and funny and intelligent. I wanted to tell you for a long time now. I love you, Gavin.’ Gavin smiled and took Nines’ hand in his. ‘I love you too.’

#detroit become human #dbh #Reed900 #RK900 #Gavin Reed #asexual Gavin Reed #ace Gavin Reed #ace Gavin #self-indulgent? maybe. don't care. #Basically I just read an ace soulmate au on AO3 and searched for more ace Gavin and there is a lack of stories so I wrote one #kinda personal I guess

[silverducks]

Game of Thrones - Jaime Lannister

A rambling character study of Jaime Lannister from Game of Thrones.

Part 1a – Jaime’s Character Arc

This post is going to look at my thoughts on exactly how I see Jaime’s character arc in Game of Thrones, based on just the show. But it’s also to set up my future posts where I explain why I find it so darn hard to understand why he had the ending they gave him. At least beside the obvious - because the writers wanted to.

Yeah I know; I’m late to the GoT train wreck of a final series. But I have a lot of thoughts and hence why I’m here typing away.

(And this is where I start to really go all English Lit exam analysis on you, so a warning for anyone who actually might be reading this post, LOL!)

My Intro to this series of posts btw, is here.

So, spoilers be below.

Ok, so to help explain why Jaime’s ending makes no sense, I firstly need to explain what exactly his character arc is in the show, or at least how I perceive it. As mentioned in a previous post on honour vs loyalty, for Jaime I see his character arc being about two, interconnected things – redemption and identity.

In series 1 and 2, he’s not a nice character – he’s a self-righteous, proud, full of himself, snob. He’s arrogant and cocky and says pretty cruel, snide things to characters we do like. And as we see him through the PoV of characters like *Mr Honourable Eddard Stark, Jaime is pretty despicable to say the least. And that is before we even get started on the whole pushing a boy out of a window because he caught Jaime having sex with his own twin sister. Oh and just as an FYI, Jaime is also called the Kingslayer because he killed the King he was sworn to protect. So yeah, most people watching the show don’t like him at the start, and neither do most of the other show characters we do like.

And from a story telling perspective, Jaime’s character can either get worse, better or stay the same as the show goes on. And in this story, he gets better, with a few slip ups along the way, and it’s fascinating and glorious!!

Like, I can think of nothing that even comes close to the amazing way Jaime Lannister’s character develops in Game of Thrones and how we as a viewer change in our perception of him.

But that only makes his ending so much more frustrating and disappointing…

Before I start rambling away though, just as a point to note; I’m using terms like good and better person and right and wrong quite loosely here. Obviously the world, even in a fictional world, isn’t all that simple. As that would be a whole other massive thematic and philosophical thesis, and it’s not really that relevant, just take the “general” meaning of the ideas, but with the understanding I know it’s a bit more complicated. Where I think it does become more relevant, I’ll expand on the ideas in that particular context. If I sound a bit flippant at times, it’s because of the whole black vs white vs grey, and how there are “rules” in storytelling that wouldn’t necessary apply to our own, real life reality. There are things that we need to take into account when we analyse characters in stories vs actual, real people. And on a side note, this is one of my favourite things about Game of Thrones, the complexity and moral ambiguity of both its characters and its story themes. But yeah, that’s a whole thesis in its own right.)

Redemption Arc

So, redemption. In order for us to start to like this character, and see him as a good guy, he has to go through a redemption arc. Like pretty much rule number 1 of storytelling. That means we have to watch him and believe in him becoming a better person. Conversations like the whole oath vs oath issue, or his chat with his father about his nicknames in series 1 makes us take notice of a character, maybe even be more invested in a character and their shades of grey, but it’s not really redemption. And considering how far in debt he is in the good vs bad guy department, he has a lot of work to do.

And my goodness, he does it. Like, I mean, this guys’ redemption arc is astonishing! He goes through so much, rethinks and challenges everything he once thought/knew about himself and his world, faces all his past wrongs and bad character traits and becomes not even a better person, but a hero! He goes from a bad villain who kills kings and pushes kids from windows, to becoming one of the main heroes we’re rooting for by the end of the story.

(A quick disclaimer here, like I’m not saying Jaime is ever, or ever will be perfect, heck, he’s human and this is Game of Thrones and Jaime’s more messed up than most. But when you think back from where he started and where he’s been, it sure is impressive – if we ignore his actual ending that is, LOL!)

And his glorious redemption arc all pretty much starts around the time he starts his fun road trip with Brienne in series 3.

So, just to give a few of his finer redemption points (and just remember his series 1 and 2 actions and our opinion of him in contrast):

He stops Brienne from being raped and gets his hand cut off for the trouble (Ouch! But suffering, especially from doing something good, gives lots of redemption points.)

He risks his life to save Brienne from being mauled to death by a bear. Like, he’s recently lost his sword fighting hand and has no weapon, but he jumps in the bear pit anyway and puts himself between the bear and Brienne. He then helps Brienne out of the bear pit first and then only just makes it out alive himself. Oh and if that wasn’t enough, he basically tells the bad guys that he’s leaving with Brienne, or they will have to kill him. Like he says this to the guy who not so long ago chopped his hand off. (Just think on that one a minute ok.)

He keeps to his promise/oath to Catelyn Stark and continues to help her daughters by giving Brienne a priceless sword and some stunning armour so she can find and help them. (This also helps Brienne, because he knows she’s not safe in Kings Landing, and gives her a purpose, because he knows that’s what she needs.)

Firstly offers to sacrifice his own life needs and goals and those vows he’s now starting to hold more dear to save his brother. When said brother then screws up that opportunity, Jaime then also helps said brother escape from being killed, going against his sister and father, who want his brother dead. (Yeah, the Lannisters are an interesting family… And you wonder why Jaime is a little messed up?)

Takes RiverRun without any bloodshed. (Like pulls off the perfect bluff in GoT siege history so that he can make sure his army succeeds, but no one is killed. (I don’t count the Blackfish, who chose to fight to the death rather than escape/get taken prisoner.)

Joins the fight for the battle against the dead, even if it also means renouncing his entire house and lineage and putting himself at the mercy and judgement of pretty much all his enemies and all he has wronged. (One of which has a habit of roasting her enemies alive with Dragon fire)

Oh and also risks his life in above mentioned battle against the dead.

A pretty impressive list imho, lots of redemption points there and that’s not even including everything else he does. Following the general storytelling themes of forgiveness and redemption, Jaime basically ticks all the boxes by all the good deeds he’s now done. And that’s one of the major reasons why we as viewers now love him so much as a character.

But that’s not all, of course. As we discover also in series 3 (a pretty important series for our Jaime), it’s not even just about him doing good things, but we realise as an audience we’ve (intentionally by the show) completely misunderstood him! Yes, he did kill the King he was sworn to protect, but only because said King was mad and was about to blow up the entire capital city where hundreds of thousands of innocent people live. And not only did he do this incredible honourable thing, but because it did go against his vow as a Kings Guard, he’s ever since been derided as the Kingslayer, Oathbreaker, Man without honour. A horrible set of nicknames that he’s borne, because he doesn’t think people would care or understand anyway. (Of course, I want to add in here that it’s partly the negative trait of pride too, thinking himself as the Lannister Lion, above having to explain himself to the sheep.)

Anyway, all this has worn him down a lot over the years and it’s messed him up good and proper. It kinda makes your own initial dislike of Jaime through *Mr Honourable Eddard Stark’s eyes seem a little unfair. Especially when the guy was barely more than a kid at the time (16 or 17 I think). And his defence mechanism to deal with this is one of the reason’s he is so cocky and arrogant – he uses his dry, often cruel humour, to mask that he does actually still care. In fact, it’s worked so well, I think at the start of the show, Jaime believes it himself; that he is a horrible, hateful person. But he did have that honour inside of him once; he did care and try to do what was right. And when you think back to his scenes in series 1 and 2, they take on new meaning now. He’s no longer such an evil arrogant, cocky knight we all pretty much immediately hated.

And as this revelation happens around the same time as he starts doing all those good deeds, it all helps work together to make us re-evaluate Jaime and grow to love him and become invested in his redemption arc even more.

(*I feel the need to add a disclaimer here, I do like Ned Stark a lot as a character. But it is interesting that as the show goes on, he almost does the opposite to Jaime – we see he actually isn’t always as good as we thought, that perhaps honour tripped into bitterness and prejudice a few times. That perhaps Ned, as much as we like him, is less full white and more speckled in shades of grey after all...(which makes him a more interesting and nuanced character imho, so rather than undermine him, it makes him more human.))

And when I rethink Jaime’s scene with Robb Stark when he’s captured, where he gives Robb the choice of ending the war if Robb can beat him in single combat, well, it adds even more depth to his character. Of course, Jaime knew he would likely win, as did Robb, so Robb refused. And as a viewer who was all Stark=Good, Lannister=Evil (except Tyrion) at the time, I was glad Robb wasn’t stupid or arrogant enough, like the Kingslayer Mr Jaime Lannister, to fall for that.

But then I remember the parallel in series 6, when Jon Snow (Stark=Good) gives exactly the same choice to Ramsay Bolton (Bolton=Spawn of Satan). Ramsay can either fight Jon in single combat, or they can all send their troops to die in their war. And as a viewer now, NOW! I think Ramsay is weak and awful for not agreeing (because he knows he can’t win too) and so sending all these soldiers to an early grave. Which is like 100% opposite for pretty much the same scenario of its series 2 counterpart. Of course, we HATE Ramsay and he has no, I mean literary NO! redeeming qualities, unlike Jaime, who we never, ever hated in the same way. But it does make you think about the whole idea of perception as well as actual deeds here. And that actually Jaime, you could argue, was doing the honourable thing by asking Robb for single combat, to spare the lives of both of their armies… I mean, obviously he wants to win the war, but maybe, he also wanted to spare as many lives as he could, too – like Jon in the series 6 equivalent. Maybe not so arrogant a request from our Jaime after all…

And another point to add in here, which further adds up to Jaime’s redemption arc, is Lady Brienne of Tarth. Yes, I’ve saved her to last for a reason, as she is, imho, THE catalyst for this amazing change we see in Jaime. If you’ll notice, a lot of Jaime’s good deeds involve Brienne and start happening around the time the two characters meet. And that very fact further proves that Jaime was and can be a better person.

He does not like her at first and she’s not quite your typical maiden. Not only is she a “beast” (to quote Jaime), but she’s a fighter, full of honour, self-sacrifice and steadfast in her purpose, and more than a match for him. Oh and she’s also his captor, dragging him to Kings Landing with a rope around his hands so they can trade him for the Stark girls.

So yeah, not the most cordial of first meetings. He pokes fun at her, trying to get her to snap, to prove she’s not as good as she seems. But she doesn’t, because she is that person, she is true to herself and not pretending. Unlike so many people Jaime knows, she is genuine.  

And he’s impressed by her skill and courage as a fighter as well. She is able to best him in the sword fight (granted when his hands are tied and he’s been sat in a cage for over a year, but he is like renowned for being one of the best sword fighters in the entire realm). Also when she fought the men who had murdered the women they found hung along the road – both as justice and to give the murdered woman a proper burial. She isn’t all talk, she can, and does fight. I bet Jaime wasn’t expecting that! And as sword fights are his thing, what he pretty much defines himself by and is most proud of, that’s a pretty big for tick from Jaime for Brienne right there.

Basically, she is a) an honourable person b) sticks to her oaths c) also able to fight (and therefore protect people) and d) refuses to let him get the better of her. The perfect, chivalrous embodiment of a brave, honourable Knight. A true Knight in all but name, whilst Jaime is now a Knight in nothing but name.

Now, I’ll discuss this more in the identity arc bit, but basically all this challenges Jaime, makes him rethink his own bitter images of himself and his world. She reminds him of his younger self, when he wanted to be that honourable Knight. And seeing this reflection of his younger, naïve and less world weary version of himself in Brienne, it helps to trigger this change in Jaime. It makes him remember who he once was, what he once stood for and believed in; that ideal that Jaime once believed is actually possible - of the brave, worthy Knight people sing songs about. And it started to make him want to be that person again. And this in turn, makes him want to start to do the right thing, to start to put honour first, which paves the way for his redemption arc very nicely.

I won’t talk too much more about Brienne here, because I think her relationship with and influence on Jaime deserves its own post. But I do think it is the specific personality of Brienne, together with the very fact that she is an ugly, “beast” of a woman, that triggers Jaime’s arc in just the right way and enables it to be so profound.

One last note on his redemption – I’ve said before it was partly his Lannister Lion pride that caused some of his suffering in relation to his nicknames. And indeed part of his arrogance is because he does think he’s better than everyone else (although not to the extent we first thought). He is the Lannister’s golden son after all and the Lannisters are basically the most powerful and wealthiest House in Westeros. It is a bad trait, yeah. But even this, even this! gets sorted out in series 8. From my list of redemption points, see the second to last point above – he faces judgement. Like a guy who had too much pride to admit he actually killed a King to help save hundreds of thousands of lives, actually, of his own volition, faces his enemies to be judged and to atone for what he has done wrong. Yeah, he also offers excuses at said trail, but if I’m honest, they do sound quite genuine to me. Is it any worse than what your typical soldier would do in a time of war? Fight in a battle and kill people? Try to capture the person (Ned) who’s wife captured your brother to avert a war? And we already know now he was justified in his killing of the mad King.

So, all in all, with this new insight into Jaime’s character, especially also seeing him through the increasingly positive eyes of Brienne (more on that later), who we know really is good and honourable, we have both a better understanding of his past actions, see his ongoing internal struggles and conflicts as he strives to do what is right and along with all his good deeds as the show goes on, we see him slowly (with lots of unfortunate set backs as well) become a better person. So come series 8, his redemption arc up to THAT scene, is glorious and basically complete.

And then there’s his identity arc. The other side of his character development, which is just as important for me and very much interconnected with his redemption.

(Like, seriously, there’s so much going on with this character that I could write essays, no a whole thesis I bet! I seriously can’t wait until I get to read him and Brienne’s chapters in the books and discover even more sides and shades to this character.)

But I’ve rambled on for far longer than I intended on his redemption arc, so I’ll save his identity arc for another day. (And hopefully it won’t be as long). Then we can get into the fun stuff like that hand he lost, that famous bath scene and his, how to put this, interesting relationship with his sister…

#If you were brave enough to get this far #Thanks for reading #And hope this made sense #Just my rambling thoughts #Yeah, I have a lot

#Game of Thrones #Jaime Lannister #Brienne x Jaime