#They'll need a few edits here and there but the stories are good!

[ineffable-romantics]

Some thoughts on why and how I believe Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship would incorporate sex/why I do not read them as wholly asexual:

This is something I've seen the most discourse about in this fandom, and I've had a few thoughts of my own that I really wanted to expand upon in a full meta/character analysis post. I do understand that this can be a contentious topic, so first, let me clarify a few things:

First of all, this is going to be long. Tbh it probably won't be that organized either. I ramble and I'm not very good at editing, so just... you know. Be warned. (*Hi, it's me from 2 days after writing this; I'm really not kidding, it's LONG)

These are all my own thoughts. They might not be hot takes, because recently I've seen more than a few people come to the same conclusions on a lot of these points as I have. But I've also had these notes in my drafts for about a week and a half now, and have been continuously adding to it as things have occurred to me. This post is essentially just somewhere for me to collect the separate but related meta I've been kicking around in my head.

I fully respect anyone who does see and prefer an asexual reading of this relationship. These are my own thoughts and interpretations as someone who is not asexual. I am in the LGBT+ community, so while I do know a few things about the asexuality spectrum, I am by no means an expert.

This is NOT something I expect, need, or even necessarily want the show (or, God forbid, Neil's tumblr ask box) to address. Tonally, it's just not that kind of show. Newt and Anathema's sex scene was very much played for laughs, and it worked for that reason. If the show found a way to address it in a way that was both appropriate for the tone of the show and ultimately satisfying, then great! But there is so much more to this relationship than sex, and I didn't need a kiss to confirm their love, so I certainly don't need a sex scene. As immortal beings (as I assume they'll stay) there is so much of the rest of their lives we'll never get to see. You can headcanon them as asexual and potentially be right. I can headcanon them as not and be equally potentially right. Again, these are just a collection of my own thoughts, because I think the question of sexuality (or lack thereof) is just as interesting a facet of these characters as any other.

Note: Tbh I've been second-guessing this whole post and debated deleting the whole thing several times for being silly or unnecessary, bc I don't want anyone to think that this is the only thing I care about when it comes to this story/characters. But if nothing else, it's inspired me to write in a way that nothing has in a very long time, so I've decided it's worth continuing, if for no other reason than that.

This is going to be a mixed bag of textual reading, subtextual reading, and a full-on reach or two. It's been a while since I've been in an English class, but if my teachers expected me to find a deeper meaning behind blue curtains, you can expect me to read too deeply into the symbolism of a loaded rifle or an ox rib. (This is probably not what my professors had in mind when grading my literary analysis papers but oh well) My point is, if it feels like a reach, I'm as aware of it as you are. I am in no way saying that all (or even any) of my points made were deliberate on the part of Neil or the actors or the writers or the directors. I am no longer the delulu Apple Tree Yard child of my youth, I promise.

If anything said here is in any way offensive or hurtful to anyone in the asexual community, please do not hesitate to message me or comment and let me know exactly what it was. I promise you it is not my intention to do so, and am happy to clarify or outright edit anything that reads that way.

With all that being said, let's talk about why I think Crowley and Aziraphale would absolutely fuck nasty incorporate sex into their relationship.

Note: I am out of practice with essay writing, so I think I'll just go down the bullet points of notes I have been making, and expand on each as best I can

Food

Where better to start than with Aziraphale's introduction to Pleasures Of The Flesh? (Just a heads up, this entire post may feel very Aziraphale-heavy, and with good reason).

This might be the least hot take here. We've all seen the Job minisode. We've all seen That Scene.

Whether this was intentional or not, the symbolism here is off the charts. Eve was tempted by an apple. So why not go a similar route and tempt Aziraphale with another fruit, or cheese, or bread, or literally anything else for his first experience with food? Instead, we go with a huge, glistening slab of fresh meat that he proceeds to absolutely go feral upon, moaning and gasping into his meal while Crowley watches with what definitely doesn't look to be disgust or even satisfaction with a good temptation. There's surprise at the ferocity of Aziraphale's appetite, certainly. But ultimately he looks to be intensely fascinated by it, while the thunder crashes, the music crescendos, and the earth literally shakes around them.

(It's also interesting to note how very little it takes for Crowley to tempt him with the ox rib. One murmured suggestion, a bit of unwavering eye contact, and vavoom Aziraphale immediately meets him in the middle.)

Cut to Aziraphale devouring the rest of the meat with Crowley splayed back on a makeshift bed, drinking wine and continuing to watch him indulge through half-lidded eyes. Outside a thunderstorm rages while they're learning secrets about each other in warm flickering firelight. It's cosy, it's intimate, and if they'd thrown in a bearskin throw blanket, it might as well be a post-coital scene straight out of Game of Thrones.

The next time (chronologically) we see them discuss food is when Aziraphale "tempts" Crowley with oysters in Rome. So Crowley first tempts Aziraphale with meat and then Aziraphale tempts Crowley with what is widely regarded to be an aphrodisiac. Interesting.

And then chronologically after that, the Arrangement begins to form, which has always reeked of a friends with benefits situation. Just to throw that in there.

It's What Humans Do

In the very first episode, we're shown Gabriel's obvious disgust and bewilderment towards Aziraphale eating sushi, calling it "gross matter" and being proud of the fact that he does not sully his body with it. Aziraphale initially tries to defend his own enjoyment in it, before passing it off as something that humans do, as something he simply has to do in order to blend in (which we know very well is not the case).

He does this again in season 2, passing off Nina and Maggie being in love as "something humans do". But it isn't, is it? Angels are beings of love, and can sense it, and understand very well what it is... up to a point. Even romantic love is obviously within their wheelhouse, given what we now know happened between Gabriel and Beelzebub (we'll come back to them).

What the "humans do" that angels wouldn't understand is messy, physical forms of love.

But here's the thing: Aziraphale and Crowley love doing what the humans do. They love drinking, they (or at least Aziraphale) love eating. They love music. Crowley loves driving and sleeping and watching rom-coms and sitcoms. Aziraphale loves reading and doing magic and earning little licenses and certificates for achievement in his various hobbies. They love to playact at being human so much that they've stopped playacting and started building a genuinely human lifestyle for themselves and with each other.

Once together in an unambiguously romantic sense, why do we think they wouldn't also want to explore one of the most prominent, intimate, powerful human expressions of love and desire with each other?

Angels, Demons, & Asexuality

Here's where I really want to clarify that in no way do I mean that sex is necessary for a healthy, fulfilling, and loving romantic relationship, or that the lack of desire for sex makes you any less human. Asexuality is a sexuality as valid and human as any. What I would say is that it is definitely in the human minority compared to allosexuality.

Angels and demons, on the other hand, are predominately asexual. Sexless/genderless unless Making An Effort. (Which, btw, is a concept introduced as early as the original book; why even bring it up as a possibility? Why not keep angels/demons being sexless/asexual as a hard and fast rule, if not to open up the potential for later use? Chekhov's Effort, if you will. And isn't that something that Aziraphale in particular is shown to do time and time again? He makes an effort in French and driving and magic, doesn't he?)

And this is why I don't believe Aziraphale and Crowley necessarily need to be asexual, narratively. There is already a huge amount of ace rep within the angels and demons (and no, not just the horrible ones. Muriel also doesn't "drink the tea" and has no reason or desire thus far to Make An Effort, and there are certainly other angels and demons who aren't horrible like the archangels seem to be who likely wouldn't Make An Effort either).

The central conflict for Aziraphale and Crowley is that they are on their own side, the ones who went native, the ones who are so different in so many ways from their respective hives. It would make sense for them to also break away from traditional angel/demon asexuality.

I say "traditional angel/demon asexuality", because I would also like to note that I would absolutely not rule out demisexuality for either of them. This post is being written to as a response to people who specifically believe that they (like the rest of the angels/demons seem to be) would be sex-averse in a relationship, and that it wouldn't be a factor in their relationship. I could easily read them as demisexual, but I do think there would be no real way of verifying this, because they've never been able to form as close an emotional relationship with anyone else but each other. Certainly not in heaven, and I can't imagine they would be able to form that kind of attachment with any of the humans, who they love and emulate but ultimately regard as the separate species they are. So yes, they could either be allosexual or demisexual, in my opinion.

Then again, now that I think about it, Making An Effort itself could be a great metaphor for demisexuality, since they would be entirely sexless/asexual until they have enough of an emotional connection with someone to consciously manifest otherwise. Since the other angels and demons don't generally form those types of emotional connections with anyone, there hasn't been a precedent for it.

Except...

Brielzebub

We do have a precedent for it now, don't we? Gabriel and Beelzebub fell in love. They are a direct foil for Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship, speedrunning right through their courtship and finding their happily ever after on the other side of things.

For being such a 1 to 1 comparison, it feels deliberate that they did not kiss. They held hands, they were gooey with each other, but they did not kiss. That feels like such a deliberate thing to omit when you know what's to come at the end of the episode between Crowley and Aziraphale.

And going back to the food = sex metaphor for a moment, let's notice how even as they fell in love over the years, even when pints and crisps were there on the table in front of them, they never felt the desire to reach out for them. They didn't need to. It's a date (love story) even if you aren't eating dinner (sleeping together).

Yes, I know Jim liked hot chocolate. No, I am not counting it because I don't consider Jim and Gabriel to be the same person with the same proclivities, and Jim was highly suggestible at the time anyway.

Gabriel and Brielzebub's big happily ever after moment (as of now) was one between two asexual supernatural beings. They did not need to kiss to drive the point home. They showed what Crowley and Aziraphale could have, if they would only acknowledge it.

Crowley & Aziraphale's Dissatisfaction

But they do have that already, don't they? If you really think about it, what do Gabriel and Beelzebub do with each other that Crowley and Aziraphale don't already? They hold hands, they spend time together, they create little rituals, they give gifts, they're visibly and verbally affectionate with each other, etc. They are more or less already in a romantic asexual marriage relationship with each other, aren't they?

And it doesn't seem to be enough for either of them.

At the beginning of the season, Crowley is immediately shown to be unsatisfied with the way things are. Obviously part of it comes from living in his car, but it seems to be more than that (especially since Aziraphale makes it clear that the bookshop is just as much Crowley's as his, implying that he could have been living there the whole time and is choosing not to, for some reason?). You could argue he's feeling unmoored without Hell telling him what to do, but isn't that what he wanted? Isn't that what he still wants, by the end of the season? All season long, he's never indicated the desire for a new job, or a new project. He stopped the apocalypse because he wanted the freedom to openly spend time with Aziraphale, to spend his time on Earth however he sees fit. Until Gabriel arrives, he has exactly that (minus a flat).

So where does the dissatisfaction come from? And if it represents anything to do with his relationship, what does he want out of it that he isn't getting already?

I think Crowley only really comes to the realisation of what he's missing when Nina names it for him, not only putting them in the category of romantic, but physical (outright asking if they are sleeping together). These two posts [1], [2] go into more detail about what I mean, but I think it really pushes him into acknowledging that their relationship is more human than either of them have stopped to consider, and what that might mean as far as everything a human relationship can entail.

After all, Nina and Maggie only advised that he should talk to Aziraphale, make clear his feelings. The decision to kiss him, to tip them over the edge from nonphysical to physical, that was all him. And no, kissing isn't sex, but I wonder how taboo even that might be in the kind of all-encompassing asexuality most angels seem to identify with. (If they're disgusted by food and drink, I can only imagine what they think of snogging, much less sex.)

Aziraphale doesn't have this moment of someone observing their relationship from the outside. He loves Crowley, and as of 1941 probably even knows he's in love with him in a way that Crowley doesn't understand yet. Which makes sense, since love is technically his job, he'd be more likely to recognise it for what it is.

However, Aziraphale's reference for romance and relationships is Jane Austen. It's chaste. It's dancing and dinner and doing sweet things for each other and roses and candles and handholding. He contextualises his love for Crowley in that soft fantasy sort of way, where it's there, it's obviously there, but it's neat and easy and unspoken. Not to quote Glee in this, the year of our lord 2023, but it's all very "the touch of the fingertips is as sexy as it gets".

Someone should tell that to Aziraphale's face, then.

I'm not going to pretend I know what Michael Sheen's script notes were, but there were definitely some Choices™ made. Because yes, there were plenty of moments in both seasons with Aziraphale looking at Crowley in a sweet, loving, smitten way. And then there were moments that were yearning.

But yearning for what, exactly? All of those sappy Jane Austen tropes already apply to the two of them. So why are there moments where Aziraphale is looking Crowley up and down like the last eclair in the window and licking his lips and visibly exhaling like he's trying to get in control of himself (see: Bastille scene + Crowley telling Muriel to ask him if they have any other questions about love)? Why is Aziraphale not only unconcerned when Crowley shoves him bodily up against a wall in s1, but staring at his lips and a beat too late in noticing Sister Mary's arrival? Why are some of his lines so suggestive? I'm sorry, but the car ride after the church explosion might as well have been the beginning of a Pizza Man porn with a really weird Blitz theme. If even my mother picked up on that vibe, I can't imagine it wasn't intentional on part of both the dialogue and the delivery.

(This section may feel like more of a reach/joke, but I'm really only 20% joking. These are writers and actors who are EXTREMELY good at their jobs; they know what they were doing here.)

More importantly, I don't think Aziraphale is even aware that there is more to what he wants. He lives in the Jane Austen fantasy and it never even occurs to him that he might be interested in anything further. It never even occurs to him that, as an angel, there is anything further to be interested in in the first place. Until Crowley forces it to occur to him. Just like I believe Nina forced Crowley to confront the idea that romantic love is what he's been feeling all along, I believe Crowley forced Aziraphale to confront the idea that physical intimacy is something he's been wanting, without even realising.

Aziraphale's Hedonism

Expanding on Aziraphale for a moment. We talked about his relationship with food, but we all know that Aziraphale is defined by his love of things that Feel Good.

It isn't just that he and Crowley love human things. Aziraphale loves the best of the best, or at least his version of it. He doesn't just love food, he loves going to fancy restaurants. He doesn't just love clothes, he loves soft, cosy, warm, plush clothes, or shiny, flashy, bougie fashion. He loves the warmth of tea and cocoa, loves getting drunk, and sitting in a comfy chair in the sunlight. He doesn't just experience, he indulges.

Given the emphasis put on things that Aziraphale loves just because they Feel Good, it feels narratively strange to assume that he wouldn't enjoy the feeling of being touched, or that he wouldn't be willing to try it, at least once, with someone he cared very deeply for. And just like the ox rib, I think that once he gets the first taste of things, he would absolutely tip over into complete and utter self-indulgence.

Dancing

I also think that dancing could be construed as a huge metaphor here. After all, we're told flat-out that angels don't Dance. Except one.

I would argue that Aziraphale, in fact, Made An Effort to learn how to Dance. He threw himself into the gavotte with delight (at a Victorian gay club; noted) and worked hard to be good at it. He's chomping at the bit to Dance with Crowley, working up the nerve to ask him with undeniably romantic intent and eagerness. So, angels don't Dance... unless they Make An Effort to do so.

We are told that demons, on the other hand, do Dance, but not well. Makes sense, since they're the ones who would want to encourage a deadly sin like lust, but have as little understanding of human love and physical intimacy as the angels. Crowley, however, is shown to be an excellent dancer at the ball, especially in his compatibility with Aziraphale.

(But Aziraphale WandaVisioned the ball so everyone knew how to dance! Yes, he did. However, the rest of the brainwashing doesn't seem to affect Crowley in any way, and they did actually live through the time period where this sort of dancing was a social norm; I'd be surprised if he never needed to learn. After all, the demons can't spell either, and Crowley is at least functionally literate, as far as we know.)

As of today, it's also been confirmed that when Aziraphale asked Crowley to dance, Crowley replied with "you don't dance." Not "WE don't dance". So going along with the metaphor, Crowley is just now discovering that Dancing is something Aziraphale is interested in at all, much less with him, and not denying that he himself is interested in Dancing. In his defense, I believe he was asleep for a few years while Aziraphale was learning the gavotte, so he wasn't exactly aware of Aziraphale's hot girl summer.

Love Languages

I want to expand on that; Crowley and Aziraphale's compatibility. Specifically in regards to their individual love languages.

We all know Crowley's love language is Acts of Service. I don't think there's any debate there. He loves it, Aziraphale loves it, they're both aware of it, we're all aware of it, God and Satan are aware of it, no surprise there.

You may disagree with me, but I believe Aziraphale's love language is Physical Touch, for a number of reasons. One of which being his aforementioned hedonism. Aziraphale likes things that Feel Good, remember? He likes soft clothes, and well-worn books. Neil himself has said that they like holding hands. And any time he is taken by surprise (Brielzebub getting together, the wave of love in Tadfield, etc.) what is the first thing he does? Reaches out for Crowley. He stops him with a hand to the chest in the pub. He leads him by the hand to the dance floor. He guides him by the waist in the graveyard. He reaches out during the entire Brielzebub scene, whether he can reach Crowley or not. Despite his own turmoil, he grasps at Crowley's back during the kiss.

The one time Crowley reaches out for him (not counting the kiss yet; we'll get there), he is aggressively pushed against a wall (by someone he loves and trusts) with a complete and utter lack of concern (and perhaps some interest, depending on how you read it).

And when he isn't reaching out for anyone, or there isn't anyone to reach out to? Well, he's wringing his own hands together, squeezing his own fingers, as if to find that physical comfort in himself.

So. With that theory in mind, we have Aziraphale (Physical Touch) + Crowley (Acts of Service). Throw in 6000+ years of deep love, cherished companionship, and forcibly repressed longing, and there is a very real potential of this combination resulting in fierce sexual compatibility. Where Aziraphale would want to touch and be touched, to indulge in physical pleasure with someone he adores, in the same the way he indulges in every other fine thing in his life. And where Crowley would want to indulge him in return, to give him everything he wants, and to take pleasure in Aziraphale's pleasure, in the same way he enjoys watching him take joy in food everything else.

So Aziraphale is an angel who is insecure about his own less-than-holy desires, who would want to treat Crowley like a luxury to be touched and cherished and adored. And Crowley is a demon who has, over the millennia, been unhappy about how they've been forced to deny even their friendship with each other, who would want Aziraphale to feel comfortable and safe and encouraged to indulge in earthly delights. That sounds like a stunning recipe for sexual compatibility to me.

"You said 'trust me'" / "And you did"

Just like the Job minisode, the Blitz is RIFE with symbolism (intentional or otherwise). This one will be quick, but I did want to touch on it because I thought it was interesting. Maybe I'm reaching at this point, but I'm assuming you read the tin.

First of all, Crowley not wanting to admit to never firing a gun before; comes off as someone who very much does not want to admit to their crush that they're a virgin ("You must have done this lots of times!" / "Umm.... yyyyyeah.")

(You could make the argument that Aziraphale having a firearms license and a Derringer in a hollowed-out book is symbolic of him not being a virgin while Crowley is. I disagree, for reasons I'll go into later, but it's a valid reading. However, I see it more like keeping a condom in your wallet; it's there in case you need it, but the opportunity has not yet risen no pun intended.)

More importantly, the theme of this entire minisode is trust. We already know they trust each other with their lives against the rest of Heaven, Hell, and the world. But specifically, this is about the importance of having complete trust in your partner in a charged, physically vulnerable, intimate moment, where the only danger is between the two of you.

Aziraphale needs to believe Crowley would never hurt him if he can help it. Crowley needs to trust Aziraphale's unwavering blind faith in him. Frankly, it all feels very symbolic of two people deeply in love losing their respective virginities with each other.

The trick is a success, and they share an intimate candlelit dinner in which they reaffirm their faith in each other. Aziraphale also begins to voice his agreement with Crowley, that maybe Heaven's rules shouldn't have to be as black and white as they are, and that there are benefits to... blurring the lines, shades of grey, wink wink (at which point even my mom was like, whoa guys, this is a family show).

Btw also: Can we all agree how much it looked like Crowley was getting ready to get a lapdance in that one scene? You know the one.

Also also: "Aim for my mouth"? Come on.

The Birds & The Bees

Now that I think of it, there's also something to be said for the fact that Crowley and Aziraphale are both obviously familiar with where babies come from (how they're made and how they're born) while the other angels aren't.

Something something Aziraphale and Crowley fundamentally understand sex and reproduction in a way the other angels (and probably demons) very much do not, nor have any desire to.

Probably not important. Just thought it was worth mentioning.

The Kiss™ & Religious Trauma

The Kiss. Where to even begin?

This has definitely been the hardest one to start, because there is so much going on here that I definitely won't be able to cover it all, and will certainly miss a few things here and there.

Aziraphale's reaction to the kiss afterwards is the most interesting to me. And I don't mean directly after, I don't mean the "I forgive you" part. I mean the way he touches his lips when Crowley is no longer in the room and he no longer needs to save face, when he is completely alone. Had it been directly after the kiss, it would have been rightfully read as horror, or disgust, a shield to discourage further action.

It's not. It isn't just a touch, it's a press. As desperate and angry and unexpected and imperfect as the kiss had been, Aziraphale is pressing it into himself, recreating the feeling as best he can. Beneath all the poor timing and shock and hurt from their fight and fallout, I think it's fair to say that it was something he enjoyed. Something he doesn't think he should enjoy, something that Feels Good that he only allows himself to indulge in when completely alone.

Remember, Aziraphale's idea of love is Jane Austen and gentleness and courtship and fantasy. If he'd ever even considered kissing an option, it might have been gentle pecks, cheek kisses, forehead kiss, hand kisses. Soft, safe, chaste affection.

Crowley's kiss turns all of that on its head. He introduces physical intimacy in a very real, very messy, very human way that I don't think Aziraphale ever even considered could apply to them. Considering what other angels are like and what they look down on, even Aziraphale's Jane Austen fantasies probably would have been considered taboo.

So for their first kiss to be rough and desperate and passionate in the way it was, of course he was confused and in shock. It was deeply physical, and as overwhelming and awful as it was in the moment, it Felt Good. Enough that he grasped at Crowley and kissed back, if only just for a moment, before stopping himself. Enough that he actively pressed it into his lips afterwards, in private, to remember.

I adore how Neil has decided to evolve these characters past the first book/season. More so in this season, Aziraphale and Crowley have both become such interesting allegories for queer people on either side of the spectrum of toxic religion. Aziraphale in particular obviously, because he is the side that so desperately wants to believe, to make a difference, and to unlearn all of the propaganda he's been fed over such a long time. Just like so much of organised religion, there is so much that he is told, time and time again, that he should not want, that he is silly or stupid or outright wrong for wanting. It reminds me so much of the severe Catholic guilt one might feel for wanting/engaging in sex for the first time, and the stigma of being queer layered on top of that.

What is so critical to Aziraphale's character is that he goes on wanting, and more than that, actively pursues. He was convinced to go up against Heaven and Hell and stop all of Armageddon because he wanted to go on listening to music and eating lunch and reading books and enjoying the simple company of the person he cares most deeply for, even if that person is supposed to be the enemy.

All this to say that if angels are as generally asexual/sex-averse as I believe them to be, narratively speaking, it would make sense for Aziraphale to be singular in that regard as well. Mirroring his first experience with food, it would make sense for Crowley to be the one to first introduce this new messy, physical, human dynamic between them, for Aziraphale to hesitate (obviously we are at the Hesitation phase at the moment), and then (eventually) for him to dive in wholeheartedly, to absolutely glut himself on this new thing that Feels Good. It would make sense for his character development to show him overcoming his metaphorical Catholic guilt and pursuing the sexual intimacy most (if not all) of the other angels would scorn.

(I can't help but remember that plot idea Neil described from the unwritten sequel, with Aziraphale in a hotel room trying to watch a full porno by way of the free 2-minute teaser clips so he wasn't technically sinning by paying for it. I so hope this is used in season 3, because gosh, I wonder why Aziraphale would suddenly be so interested in observing human physical intimacy after 6,000 years. Lonely and doing a little surreptitious research there, angel?)

Crowley, on the other hand, is the queer person who has broken free from his toxic religion. He prides himself on being his own person, on their his own side. He doesn't have the hang-ups Aziraphale does. He doesn't worry that he's going to be judged or cast aside for wanting things he's not supposed to. So it only makes sense for him to be the first one to suggest/initiate physical intimacy. It makes sense for him to be the one who "goes too fast" (another fantastic example of this dynamic beginning as early as s1; what is that conversation in the car meant to represent, if not Aziraphale being overwhelmed by the intensity of their relationship, and his fear of succumbing to it when he believes he shouldn't? It's also interesting that this is the first conversation to take place in Soho, just after watching Aziraphale realise he's caught feelings for a demon, with the red glow of lust serving as the backdrop).

Do I think the kiss in and of itself was sexual? No. I think it was a passionate and devastating last-ditch effort on Crowley's part to convey the way he feels for Aziraphale. Not just that he loves him, but that he loves him in the most human way possible. But I do think that the kiss represents how they can move forward from here, and what they might want to explore with each other once they feel free enough to do so.

In Conclusion

I am sure, deep in my bones (unless we are explicitly told otherwise), that this was both of their first kisses no, I'm not counting the gavotte, and that neither of them have ever thought to do anything else physical with the humans while they have been on Earth. Like I said before, they adore the human race and lifestyle in general, but ultimately view them as a separate species altogether, and they seem mostly happy to keep to themselves and each other, unless otherwise necessary. I just can't see either of them being drawn enough to a human to pursue anything close to sex. If Crowley in particular has had anything to do with sex in the context of temptations, I'm positive he would be inciting lust amongst the humans themselves, not involving himself directly. At least not that directly.

So, like every other human experience they've had on Earth, sex is something new that they could explore together, just the two of them, on their own side. A deeply intimate, tangible declaration of their love and everything they've gone through to earn it. A visceral finger to give both Heaven and Hell. A renewed appreciation for their corporations and for each other's. A enjoyable method for immortal beings to simply pass the time in each other's company. A new and exciting way to Feel Good, and all the variations that come with it.

You might agree with this post, or you might not. Whether this is something that is ever addressed or not, it doesn't matter to me. This is a brilliant love story either way, and I genuinely feel so privileged to witness it.

But I just can't find it in myself to imagine, given everything we know about these two characters, that sex isn't an experience they would both consume with wholehearted enthusiasm, curiosity, and profound, ineffable adoration.

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Bonus feature: the very silly notes I made to myself that inspired this post

#pinned post bc I'm particularly proud of how it turned out and i don't want it to get buried when people check out my blog lol #Good omens #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 #good omens season 2 spoilers #good omens 2 #good omens 2 spoilers #gos #gos spoilers #gos2 #gos2 spoilers #gomens #gomens spoilers #gomens 2 #gomens 2 spoilers #good omens s2 spoilers #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #mine #meta #character analysis #character study #discourse #making an effort #this literally took me a week to finish i really hope it doesn't sound stupid lol #i know I'm gonna wake up in a cold sweat every couple days bc i forgot to add something but i needed this out of my drafts and also my brain

[bettsfic]

hi beth! i've got a fic that i've been struggling with for some time, and i think i could feasibly it scrap for parts and come out with a few smaller and (more likely to be finished) oneshots. i loved your advice that nothing is wasted when writing and not to be precious about ideas/words, so do you have any advice on whether it's the right idea to scrap a fic, and if so, how to do it?

i think if you're considering scrapping a fic for parts, it's worth it to try, just to see if you like the result better than what you already have. you really have nothing to lose, you know? either you'll get some good one-shots out of it or you'll get some new insight into the form you've already chosen.

one of the hardest skills to develop in writing is being able to feel and acknowledge when a story is working and when it's not. it's so amorphous and clouded by either doubt or enthusiasm, and you never know for sure until you get to the end.

going back to my knitting analogy, it's the point at which you realize the sweater you're knitting is not going to fit its recipient. so do you undo the whole thing and start over? use the yarn for socks to give to multiple people? or do you find someone slightly smaller to give it to, knowing you'll be a little disappointed in yourself for not doing what you set out to do?

i think the activity i'm about to lay out is good to do not just in this situation but also any time you feel very lost about a big project that you've been working on for a while. i've done it many times and i hope it helps you as much as it has me.

step one: go through the piece and highlight all the parts you like. this can be anything from entire chapters to maybe just a single sentence. these are parts that make you go "yeah this is working" or that you're particularly proud of. your darlings, if you will.

optional: in a different color, you can do this also for the parts you really don't like, that you'd be embarrassed to show someone else. what's left un-highlighted is what you feel neutral about.

step two: either zoom very far out on the document or do a multi-page view, however you can to see as much of the work as possible at once. notice the ratio of highlighted to un-highlighted text.

step three: brainstorm. i have to do this part with pen and paper, but however you get your big-picture ideas down is fine. at this point you haven't made any major decisions yet. it's just an experiment. IF you were to scrap a story for parts, what would it look like? and so you can start writing down your one-shot ideas.

at this point, you should have a better idea about how you want to proceed. maybe the highlighting activity brought to light the fact that there are really only a few spots you don't like and maybe you can rewrite or cut those; or maybe you have an idea for some restructuring. or you really like the one-shot ideas you've written and want to start the first one.

it's important to remember that there's really no loss here. you can write the one-shots, post them, and then come back to the longer version of the fic maybe years later and finish it. it's fanfiction; your audience will not complain about overlapping parts of stories. they'll just be happy to have more to read.

so if you've decided to play around with the one-shots, here's how i've done it in the past.

step four: open a new document. i call this document the stitch draft. the stitch draft is used for situations like this, but also for major structural edits. you need a bridge between the old draft and the new one. the sole purpose of this draft is to copy and paste over the parts you've already written that you want to keep for your first one-shot, in roughly the order you want them in.

step five: open another new document. put it side by side with the stitch draft. start writing the one-shot by bringing in the work from the stitch draft while also writing the connective tissue of the new context of the story. this may involve editing the stitch draft elements at the same time to make them relevant to your new story.

the stitch draft method has never really steered me wrong. in fact when you're very stuck i think highlighting and moving stuff to a new document is a way to help inspire new ideas, simply because you're fiddling with the text and getting out of your own head about it.

#writing advice #revision #structure #stitch draft

[em-dash-press]

How Traditional Publishing Works for Novel-Length Manuscripts

Your future as a writer may seem murky at best. It's difficult to dream beyond your latest notebook or Google Doc if you don't know how publishing works.

Today we're going to talk a bit about that! This post will be for publishing longer manuscripts. Eventually, I'll make another one for publishing short stories.

Step 1: Finish That Manuscript

You may have heard that you can start contacting literary agents or publishers after you have a decent chunk of your manuscript done. While there are a few here and there that could be fine with that, it's best to always finish your manuscript before querying begins.

How do you know when it's finished? I'll write more on that later, but for now here's a basic checklist:

Edit your story for flow, character development and pacing. This may involve storyboarding again or even talking through your book with a friend.

Edit your work for line-edits (spelling, punctuation, etc.)

Give your work to a beta reader! That could be your partner, best friend, family member, etc. They'll have a fresh pair of eyes for things like plot holes, confusing arcs, unfinished story lines, and tension that never resolves.

Double check that your themes get resolved.

Step 2: Draft Your Query Letter

I already made a post showing how to draft a query letter and the answers to common query questions, but here's a summary: you need a good query letter for your finished manuscript. They're the first impression an agent gets of you and your work.

Query letters always include:

An introduction to your work (the title, the genre, the word count, a one-sentence summary)

An explanation of the plot (don't hold back—it should include your beginning, middle, and end, plus any tropes and themes)

Comparative titles (novels in the same genre as your work that were published in the last ~2 years or less)

The reason why you wrote your novel (what makes you the best person to write about that theme/plot/character growth, etc)

Step 3: Find Your Agents

There are a few ways to find agents and you can try different methods throughout your querying journey.

Use QueryTracker to find agents by genre, availability, location, etc. Then track your queries with the same website to find out who's read your work, who's rejected it and who wants to get in touch. (The free version does most of this, but there's a paid version for people who want to hardcore dedicate themselves to querying).

Check out those comparative titles—authors almost always thank their agents in the Acknowledgements section. Start a running list and note their publishers.

Search Twitter for agents who are open to queries. It may seem strange, but most agents have Twitter accounts and announce when they're open or closed to queries. You can always follow them on your personal or writing account, but you can also search for them by looking up hashtags like “open for queries" and “submissions are open.” If you want more details, check out this great resource for more hashtags and strategies. Note—you should never direct message an agent on Twitter. Always contact them through their preferred methods, usually located in their bio or pinned tweet (if they’re open to queries).

Step 4: Sign With an Agent

This step can take weeks, months, or years. Every writer’s querying journey is different. Sometimes the market isn’t right for a specific genre or storyline. Other times, you may need time to revise and polish your manuscript or shelve it entirely for a more developed idea.

Searching “amquerying” on Twitter is a great way to read other writers’ experiences. You’re not alone if you’re frustrated, exhausted, tired, or just plain sad. It’s hard to get rejections and try again when you’re likely the only person who currently believes in your specific manuscript.

Agents have to pick projects based on what they want to represent, but also what they can sell. If your story is too new or different, they may pass until it’s more culturally relevant or more popular with readers.

When an interested agent offers representation (likely after requesting a full manuscript), ask plenty of questions to get to know them. You don’t have to accept the first agent who comes along. They should align with your vision for your book and who you want to reach with it.

When you do sign with an agent, celebrate! It’s a big step that you should recognize! Lots of hard work and dedication went into getting an agent, and it’s only the start of your publishing journey.

Step 5: Look Forward to Your Book Deal

Your agent has a few roles. They’re supposed to look out for your best interests with publishers and all the legal aspects that come along with book deals.

But first, they have to land a deal. That means they write pitch letters or decks and send them to publishers they think will be the best fit for your manuscript. Letters are more common, but pitch decks are more necessary for writers of children’s books and graphic novels who have pictures integrated into their work.

This process can take a while. Don’t expect to sign a book deal overnight or even in the first month. As long as your agent keeps up communication with you about the process, you’ll know you’re in good hands.

Things That Will Be in Your Book Deal

Your Contract

Contracts include all the information related to your deal. Your agent will use it to potentially negotiate for more money, better control over your film rights or foreign publication rights, and basically all the little details that go along with those things.

Your Advance

When writer’s sign a book deal, the get a check. That check is called your advance. The advance is a sum of money that the publishing house or imprint gives you for the right to publish that book. It could vary from $1,000 to six figures, but new authors (and especially women and people of color) typically get around $5,000 for their first book.

Smaller amounts will arrive in a single check. Larger amounts are split into multiple checks spanning the time from your signing date to publication.

Your Royalties

Every time your book sells a copy, you’ll earn royalties on that sale. However, writers don’t see royalty earnings until those royalties out-earn their advance.

If you got the average $5k advance, you’ll have to sell enough books to earn $5k in royalties before you see routine checks in the mail for royalties after that point. Your agent will negotiate your royalty percentage during…well, negotiations.

Step 6: Figure Out the Pre-Production Details

You’ve signed your book deal—throw a party! Then it’s time to get to work.

Your agent will connect you with an editor, who then sends you an editorial letter after reading your manuscript. It will contain everything they think could improve plus their marked-up copy. You’ll dive into structural changes if necessary, but mostly line edits. 

You don’t have to agree with everything your editor suggests. It’s still your book. However, they know the industry the best and will want your work to succeed as much as you do. Talk things out and come to a compromise, but stay true to your book’s intended purpose throughout editing.

Your publisher’s legal team will go over your edited copy when it’s close to perfect to ensure there are no issues. They typically find things like the use of song lyrics that you haven’t bought the rights to and mentions of real persons or brands that may result in lawsuits.

Next, your design team will work with you on potential cover designs. interior layouts, jacket versus hardcover designs and blurb placement. They have most of the say over your final cover, but your agent can go to bat for you if you think the options are truly ugly.

Next, you’ll come up with a marketing plan. Imprints and publishing houses typically have marketing teams and publicity experts that work with authors. You’ll talk about which stores will sell your book and which websites will get ads based on your target reader audience’s known shopping habits/website preferences. Ads on social media and your involvement with posting about your book will also come up.

Proofreaders and beta readers are also part of this stage. They’re the fresh sets of eyes every writer needs to know if their readers will understand how they wrapped up their themes, character development paths and plot. They’ll point out when things don’t make sense, need more expansion or could be cut as they read through your Advanced Readers Copies (ARCs).

Step 7: Marketing and Blurbs

A bit more about the marketing stage—your agent has a hand in this too. Based on their previous or current authors, they may have personal connections with influencers and big names in the book world. They’ll send those people ARCs and ask those people for blurbs if they think those famous people have audiences who would be interested in your manuscript.

You can also talk with your agent about getting blurbs from similar debut authors in your genre or only authors from marginalized communities, depending on your priorities. The only time they might say no to this idea would be if your preferred people hardly have audiences or if their audiences have shown interest (via book sales) in other genres.

Your team will decide other things like:

Who gets your ARCs

If you’ll send some ARCs through contests

Which retail stores will stock your book

If you’ll pitch your book to get sponsored by big book clubs

If you’ll pitch for your book to be included in book subscription services

Where you’ll post digital ads and for how long

 How you’ll create marketing campaigns with sites like Goodreads and other book sites popular with readers

Most writers also have to market their book on their personal Facebook, Instagram, and/or Twitter accounts. You’ll likely only get out of this step if you’re already an established author who can sell books without blinking (think: James Patterson or Nora Roberts).

If you need help putting together a posting plan, your marketing team and agent can help with that. Most publishers request that their writers’ develop online followings because it creates personal, instant connections with readers/allows for free advertising via posts/generates direct feedback.

Step 8: Negotiate Your Media Rights

Most writers negotiate their media rights after landing a publishing deal. The publisher needs to know that your work has a chance of being picked up as a movie or TV show. Debut authors have a lot to prove, unless you’re one of the rare writers who snags a movie deal alongside a mega-advance because your work is once in a generation.

Your agent will negotiate this for you and possibly let you keep your media rights. If you keep them, you can sell them separately later on. When you or your publisher is ready to sell, production company scouts will see the announcement on book deal websites. They may contact your agent to negotiate with you before you start selling copies, but it may happen after your book has shown promise on the market for a while too.

Step 9: Sign Copies of Your Books

About a month before readers can buy your books, you’ll get copies to sign! Prepare your hand and wrist, because this step surprises most writers. If you have more than a handful of books to sign, you’ll need to pace yourself.

Still, this is an exciting step in your publishing journey. Take lots of selfies and enjoy the moment!

Potential Step 10: Start Your Book Tour

Big names in the book world get book tours set up by their publishers. Debut authors often don’t. If you want to do a book tour, talk with your agent early in the process. They can work with your publicist to schedule a few speaking engagements, but you’d mostly be in charge of contacting bookstores to reserve an hour or two for signing books and meeting with readers.

If your publisher does want you to do a book tour, regardless of whether you’ve been published or not, they might pay for your transportation and accommodations. It depends on your unique situation. 

---

This is a very brief, not super specific outline of traditional publishing. I hope it gives you some perspective on the process. After landing a book deal, it can be a year or more before your debut day arrives. There’s so much happening behind the scenes—but now you know a bit more about it.

#book publishing #book publishing faqs #writeblr #writers of tumblr #writing community #writing advice #writing tips #creative writing #traditional publishing #publishing #publishing a novel

[finalmemes]

UNDERWORLD roleplay sentence starters of the 2003 film. feel free to edit according to scenario / pronouns. tw: violence, guns, death, murder, language.

victory, it seemed, was in our grasp.

the moon no longer held her sway.

this signaled the end of an era.

you're gonna be okay.

you're acting like a pack of rabid dogs!

put some clothes on, will you?

we have a serious problem.

i'm betting it's military.

they opened fire on us in full view of the public.

you said you didn't see anything.

i know what i heard, and i know what my gut tells me.

we've hunted them to the brink of extinction.

i'd rather you prove me wrong by checking it out.

have your men tighten things up.

i'd never treat you like that.

it's a waste of time, you know.

i'll never understand why [ name ] left him in charge.

you should definitely wear this one.

he's attractive ... for a human.

if you ask me, you take this warrior business far too seriously.

you can't undo the past, no matter how many you kill.

what's the point in being immortal if you deny yourself life's simple pleasures?

put on something elegant and be quick about it.

any progress?

you heading home?

we were ambushed.

look at this mess.

regeneration's impossible at this point.

you don't think, or you don't know?

must i do everything myself?

he comes in, he does his job and then he goes home.

we don't have much of a life.

he's not in some kind of trouble, is he?

what the fuck is going on?

stop the car!

you've lost a lot of blood.

if you don't stop the car, you'll get us both killed.

relax, old friend.

i've tasted his flesh.

just two days till full moon.

it's a shame we don't have more.

lay still. your skull's taken a good knock.

do you have any idea why those men were after you?

this is completely unacceptable!

would you just hear me out?

it's beyond me why you're so obsessed over this ridiculous theory.

you're infatuated with him, aren't you?

i sure hope you never get pissed off with me.

do you believe [ name ] died the way they say?

it's nothing but an ancient story.

where you going with this anyway?

you were told to set up shop and lay low!

the human doesn't concern you.

don't force me to regret our arrangement.

remember, i've bled for you once already.

without me, you'd have nothing.

i saw the wound with my own eyes, i swear it.

i've been having these hallucinations and these delusions.

okay, so a full-grown man bit you?

haven't you been listening to me?

i'm gonna be back in a minute.

please forgive me, but i desperately need your guidance.

i can only hope [ name ] will hear my plea.

i fear we may all be in grave danger.

if i'm correct it would mean [ name ] is in league with him.

what's so pressing?

i want to speak with [ name ].

i warned her, but she didn't listen.

what's this ruckus?

never come here again. they'll kill you.

like it or not, you're in the middle of a war that's raged for 1000 years.

no one's ever survived a bite from both species.

we have much to discuss, [ name ] and i.

she has shown me a great many disturbing things.

perhaps i should have left someone else in charge of my affairs.

you're in need of rest.

i've rested enough.

that bitch has betrayed me.

are you to be trusted?

it's time i filled you in on a few things.

i'm seeing these things, these hallucinations.

what are these for?

what do you do with them after?

why do you hate them so much?

why can't you just answer the question?

their screams woke me.

i'm afraid that i'm going to have to place my faith in you, my friend.

you know, if i knew then what i know now, i could have saved her.

i came over here to move on, to forget.

it seemed like a good idea at the time.

digging into the past is forbidden.

i should be heading back.

when the full moon rises tomorrow, you will change, you will kill, and you will feed.

how could you do this to me? embarrass me like this?

from here on out, you'll do as i say.

it is the oldest story in the book.

he desires the one thing he cannot have.

you do not possess the necessary skills.

there's been a complication.

how could you trust him over me?

these rules are in place for a good reason and they are the only reason we have survived this long.

you will not be shown an ounce of leniency.

you should've listened to me and stayed out of this.

soon, you'll be seeing things my way.

the perimeter sensor's been tripped.

are you fucking kidding me?

look, i want you to slip off the property and find out what's keeping her.

your incompetence is becoming most taxing.

now, i want you to tell them exactly what you told me.

soon, this house will lie in ruins.

you and you alone will know the truth of this.

it has already begun.

i'm sorry i doubted you.

it may take a little time for the grogginess to dissipate.

he's in desperate need of a lesson in manners.

speaking of manners, where are mine? forgive me.

there's no going back?

your war, it has nothing to do with me.

what are they gonna do to [ name ]?

i thought we had a deal.

there's no defeating him. he grows stronger as we speak.

is there another way out?

that's enough, you're coming with me!

your place is by my side.

is it not a fair trade, the life i have granted you? the gift of immortality?

soon i will become the hunted.

#horror sentence starters #rp sentence starters #rp memes #writing prompts #horror prompts #underworld sentence starters #film sentence starters #request

[lumarisart]

I'm almost there! SGC 6 is taking longer than I wanted to get done, but it's mostly executive dysfunction kicking my ass lol. This is why I don't do preorders for this series - but also it's a thing for fun, I'm trying to keep it fun to work on.

A little TLDR, because the amazon descriptions suck & I never properly introduced my writing or this series lol (I should hire someone when I have the money, to write a better blurb lol) but SGC is, in a nutshell, about a group running a cafe in the day, and doing some ghoul hunting at night for extra cash. When they stumble on something seemingly big, they think they can leverage whatever info they find into a possible job - whether just selling the information or doing something in return for a big payout - either way, they stick their noses into something that ends up being bigger than they expected.

At one point they'll have to decide whether to continue a "normal" life, or if they should seize the chance to try and do something about it. That's the plot, but at its core it's a very obvious love story about two guys who were very good friends, but became something more.

I rate it 18+ for vulgar language, some explicit scenes (both s*x and gore and drug use) and there's a lot....lot of F-bombs.

Setting: Think of a high fantasy world. A few thousand years later, they merge magic and technology. An industrial revolution begins! Then, a couple more thousand years, and new magic is discovered, and space exploration is unlocked! Now we have mega-metropolis cities, space ports, council of dragon shifters splitting the city into districts, and intergalactic government that tries to keep them in line.

The characters never set foot offworld (not in this season anyway) but there's plenty of mention of it.

Serial: This is a serial, not a big book - each episode is 20-60 pages, sometimes less, sometimes more. But it's why it's $1 an episode to read (although I may restructure this if I can get my own website redone) via Amazon (for now.) Once the whole season is done (10 episodes) I'll lump them together in a big single volume and offer a special edition paperback and hardcover (which I hope to fully illustrate!)

Background:

I started SGC in 2020, though festered the idea of it in October of 2019. 2020 needed a change of pace from my usual high/steampunk fantasy stories and characters, and thus SGC was born. In 2021, after hiring my editor (who isn't on here sadly) we worked together to get the first 5 launched. It's been over a year since releasing SGC5, but I'm happy to finally get back into it.

If you read all that, thank you! If not, totally understand. Thank you for your time ^_^

#booksbooksbooks #book #serial #shortreads #fantasyscifi #cyberpunk vibes #mmromance #queer books #lgbtq #amwriting

[minzart]

Hi, how are you? Have you been taking care of yourself? I hope you have!

Anyway, for the 'Bad beginnings AU' I was wondering, what would happen during the Ghost marriage event? Cause personally I like to think that Yuu totally wins the 'Composition' I think this is how it goes:

Eliza: STUPID, ALL OF YOU ARE IDIOTS!

Yuu, being pushed to the front by Crowley: Uhmmm, Madam Eliza. If I may, I don't have a kingdom, a wolf or a castle, but I'm here to ask you, and I mean it from the bottom of my heart, will you marry me?

Vil: They'll blow it-

Eliza: Hmmmm, YES!

Ghosts: What

Yuu: What

Everyone: What

You don't have to do this, but if you can please do, thank and take care!

Trying my best wich isn't a lot but it's enough :D

Also thank you for asking and my deepest apology for the long wait

Shoroud was in trouble, bigg trouble, he literally just wanted his game for seven sake, he had things to do! Games to play! Movies to see and cameras to watch! He can't be stays trapped here with a goddamed gosth bride THAT WANTS TO MARRY HIM OF ALL FUCKING PEOPLE!

His selfsteen doesn't need more blows in it hell, only a dead person showed interest in him, it that was the bar then what could he even do if he ever daydreamed of having the littlest of chances with the magicless annoyance that was the janit-wearenotgettingintothatyet, goddamed it he could feel and see the pink sparks in his hair.

... were are they bringing him anyway?

[Meanwhile at Ramshackle]

Yuu was trying their best to not be kicked out of the only place they could sleep, bc seven know the headmaster wouldn't provide another room and all seven dorm leaders are dieing for the chance to have them in their grasp and lord knows very well Yuu couldn't take more of their daily weird bullshit than they already take

So if what it takes to stay in their only home is negotiating with... ghosts... great....

"Look what a second! Please! Listen! I-"

"NO MORE WAIT! Our princess needs her room for our stay to her wedding! She has waited too much already!"

"DOES SHE NEEDS A SERVANT?!"

".... what? She has many already"

"Buttttt one more couldn't hurt right? I already do many chores here, I have experience then! And and and! I heard that there's going to be a wedding! I could help her with... wedding stuff... right..."

"... the groom is a living being..."

Yuu sweats, the ghost guard continues to concider

-----

As the time comes for the boys to storm in the weeding, Yuu makes sure the preparation and food is editable for the groom, wich means, Idia, trapped as he may be, is having the most stressful evening of all time, for his crush looks like a servant... and by the seven they look so good and proper and this is the longest they both have been alone... together

It's silent, mostly at least, Yuu cleans and, most times, tries to make themselfs useful, even if the ghosts already did all there is to do, and then there was Eliza... oh dearest ghost princess, sweet and kind, even if she's a little bit too obsessed with the idea of a perfect prince

The stories Yuu hears are of her past, of loves never blossoming and kindness ever lasting. And the few interaction they had had been... good.

For running and felling always watched, with Eliza they felt almost at peace, so a bit of their true personality shines at her presence, tired, hardworker, soft, and so much more

And Eliza... she takes such a liking to Yuu, they speak as in fear of anger, wich makes them clearer in their words, and their eyes, tired eyes screaming gratitude at her, as if she's a goddess of eternal mercy, her subjects always said she was/is such a kind person, but they have always lived in her reing, not knowing hardships of another ruler, Yuu whoever... Yuu confirms to her, how her kindness is true... so much alike... a love of a servant to their mistress...

And Idia, he's in awe, he saw it, shining brighter than any star, rarer than any character he has wished for, Yuu's smile... oh he wishes he had a cellphone, he wishes the ghost apearence didn't interfere with the cameras, he prays to hear their laugh... but the burning feeling of jealousy... Eliza... not only is she trying to speared him of Yuu but she... the glimmer of want... he knows it well, as a distorted mirror in a sweet face, she wants Yuu... wants them as he and many other wants them... and... she has them...

That smile was never show, never seen, never existed to any others after Yuu had finaly understood how things work at school, too soon for any of them to see their true self... but Eliza... merely a day has passed and she has already cracked them... a smile... Idia wonders... if he accept the proposal... would Yuu came too?

---------

They were there...

The boys saw at the right side of the so famous Ghost Bride, Yui hasn't been seen I'm campus for a day, they tried to argue with headmaster about the insue, to unburden them and scearch for the poor magicless handyman of the school... but there they are...

Proper, quiet, servant of Eliza, and desire of thousands... oh how lovely how cruel, how... perfect. Why act, if it can be true? They glanced at Yuu at every sentence, a clearly attempt to signal to them, this can be us, this will be us... can you picture it Yuu?

Oh Idia is fuming, he knows what they are doing, each and every single one of them were rejected, Yuu continues silent during it all, eyes downcast, but then... he felt something droping in his hand, small, cold... circular. A whisper in the loveliest sound made his spine tremble "propose"

His breath was rapidly, his face contorted in a frown only to hold the panic and euphoria inside... Yuu smelled like lavender, their hand harsh from work but in their head such a cleaver being... how can he let Yuu down? Not after that... not after he felt Yuu's breath in his neck and hand in his even for a brief moment

"T-that's not fair..."

"Oh? Did you said something love?"

"I mean-Shouldn'tIproposetoo?"

"What?"

"Princess, I think your prince has been overtaken with jealousy" Yuu interfered, bowing gently and placing their hand in Idia's shoulder, if they felt him tremble they didn't say "Perhaps letting him propose would quell these feelings"

The whole hall echos with "WHAT???"

"has he accepted his fate?"

"ARE YOU TELLING ME WE WASTED TIME AND EFFORT FOR NOTHING?! "

"my skills wasted for nothing"

"He has lost it"

"A... proposal?"

"I... never understood how someone in the real world could make the kinds of actions Videogame characters did so flawlessly in games. Saying their love out lound so noisy... but with you it almost seems possible, heh. I dream of whisking you away like in "the queen of the underworld" your voice your laugh everything about you hunts me to my very core" his eyes focused beyond Eliza, boring into Yuu's soul, his smile sharpens and his hair sparkles tiny amber's of pink

"I-I... I want to-tobewithyouforethernity I-i" trembling he gets on one knee"w-wouldyouhavemeasyourplayer2?" Presenting the rin

"STOP THE WEDDING!"

The shout frightens all, Idia drops the ring, only for Yuu dive fro it grabbing the princess hand and sliding it into the proper finger "sorry"

The ghosts disappears

"At least the headmaster didn't lie about it... this ring realy does send the ghosts back..." turning to Idia Yuu gives him a sheepish smile "you did great... Idia Shroud was it?"

He can't stop replaying that smile over and over again in his mind... it was for him...

Asks for the AUs are still closed

#twst bad beggining au #twst bb au

[not-poignant]

Hey there. Do you have any tips on how to stay consistent with writing, and how to stay focused on the task at hand?

Hi anon!

So firstly, I've answered versions of this question quite a few times so you might want to go into the 'Pia on Writing' tag because they'll be there.

A quick look has found:

How to write more words regularly - This one is good for just...straight up practical advice.

But I wanted to speak frankly which is - what works for me might not work for you! We all have different strengths and weaknesses and depending on how we orient towards writing depends on what those weaknesses are. For example, I need to learn how to take more breaks and rest more, and not write as much. The 'writing a lot and sometimes too much' comes pretty easily to me these days.

Not all writers are meant to be consistent writers. I don't have a daily habit and I haven't written anything at all in a week and a half. I have my monthly wordcount and that's it. Someone else might need to write or edit every day, in order to not lose sight of their projects. Someone else might need five intensive days a month. It will depend on their nature, their personality.

Not all writers have the same reasons behind why they can't stay focused on a task. I have ADHD, but I can also hyperfocus on characters and a storyline. Others have ADHD, and cannot hyperfocus on their characters or storyline long enough to finish a story. That's a problem I don't know how to remedy, because I don't have that kind of ADHD, so I've never had to 'solve' it before. Some writers are perfectionists which hamper them, I am not a perfectionist and I'd rather the thing be out in the world with some flaws, than on my computer talking to no one. I need the dopamine more than I need something to be perfect. So you see anon, sometimes the things that impact us just aren't universal, which means you need more specific advice. There will be perfectionist writers who will have lots of great advice, there will be ADHD writers who get bored of a story who have great advice. :D

What I will say is that pretty universally, writing consistently and staying focused are both like muscles in the body. I'm where I'm at today because I've had 9-10 years of practice doing this, and when you start out (which the above link addresses) you will need to aim more realistically and reasonably, and start there.

It's also worth having a really grounded sense of why you want to write more consistently / focus more on your writing. Is it for fun? Is it because you want to finish a project? Is that project something you'll feel good if you finish or are you over it? Is it because you want to make an income? (Have you considered there are approximately 40 billion easier ways to make an income?) Is it because you just want to see if you can do it?

Sitting down and thinking about your motivations here will help motivate you if you can keep your goals in mind. And it will also help clarify what you get out of writing in the first place.

Re: Staying focused. It depends on your distractions. I use music, that helps me. That might be terrible for you. I make sure I'm eating well - the brain needs carbs and fats, and my whole body needs protein and fibre - so I'll have a decent breakfast before starting out. Sleep is important. Drinking regularly is important. There's very basic things here which seem obvious that help a ton with concentration, but if you're not doing them, they're a good place to start. You'd be surprised how much just 'eating balanced meals, drinking regularly and sleeping enough hours' helps with concentration. Like, so much.

A friend of mine uses the Pomodoro method (that would drive me nuts), there's using write-ins like Twitch streams to basically 'body double' with other people who are writing at the same time (I find this very motivational). There's gamification like 4TheWords (love this site). There's 'I get to have a cookie if I write another 200 words.' There's 'actually I've lost focus because this part of the story might be broken and if I just do this the river will start to flow again' as a writing technique.

Mostly, you'll need the time and space to just amass the number of techniques you need to help with both focus and writing regularly. But in all of this, it's vital to be patient with yourself. You can't expect yourself to take a week to end up somewhere that someone else took 3 or 4 years to get to. And it won't be...consistent. Don't side-eye me or anything, but like, we're not meant to be machines, even people who write relatively consistently (like me) need breaks, get burnt out, get tired, are over it, and sometimes need brand new techniques to start working again. Knowing that it's not a linear upward curve of ever-increasing focus lets you also just...be compassionate and patient with yourself.

Oh yeah, because you'll have to get good at both of these too anon. :D Learning discipline and being firm with yourself can't work successfully if you also then mentally punish yourself for not doing it 'well enough' to the point where you don't want to do it anymore. Cultivating the 'I'll try again tomorrow' or 'I did great today!' parts of your brain help a ton with consistency. If you know you're going to be kind to yourself for doing well, and firm but compassionate with yourself when you don't, all of this gets way, way easier.

#asks and answers #pia on writing #as i get older i realise that like #i can teach people like me how to write like i do #but there are so many writers who aren't like me #who need techniques that wouldn't work for me #or that i can't even offer advice on because i haven't used them #i realised recently for example that i don't really get writer's block anymore #my biggest issues really are around taking breaks and being more structured #if someone else's biggest issue is they take too many breaks #i'm more likely to need advice from them lol #we are all so different re: how we approach writing and what we need to do it #i am always willing to help #doing the CliftonStrengths quiz really changed the way i thought of this #highly recommend looking into Becca Syme's work re: writing #she's amazing

[remnantsofthepast-if]

First time I was playing, I didn't really click with any of the ROs romantically (not your fault, sometimes my brain works like that) so I was content with playing platonic but I was also bummed that I wouldn't be able to continue the story without choosing one at a certain point (not sure if it's on purpose or I fucked up somewhere down the line while choosing options). I liked the story however, so I just randomly picked Rayco to get it over with.

And let me tell you, I was NOT expecting to actually like their romantic route. I did NOT. But here I was, completely GONE for them. I still am, actually, but I am now also eyeing the secret RO. 👀🫣

Oh, I get it, don't worry. I know there's going to be people who won't like the characters in that way (or at all xD), it happens to me all the time with other stories. Many men, many minds and all that lol.

You cannot not choose a RO. My intention was to make a romance story, so you have to pick one of the characters no matter what. The most 'platonic' path would be Ada/Omar's since they aren't in love with the MC nor like them romantically yet. Their dynamic is friends with benefits that turns to something genuine with time. As for how the MC feels about them... that's for the player to decide in a few chapters. But in the end, they'll both fall for the other.

Or perhaps Leire/Luca. While they are starting to feel something, they have no idea of what it is, so they think it's just a strong friendship lol.

However, and I think a few people will like this, ever since I thought about the 'nameless' romance path, I've been thinking about a way to implement it that works with the story and that doesn't change his character, which would require to add the friendship path in chapter 4. It would make the chapters a bit shorter, and I'll have to change many scenes. But honestly? I think it would be a good addition for people who don't click with any of the current ROs :D. And it would also give me the opportunity to add that -not so- secret RO into the mix ;). Although people will most likely need a guide to romance him. Because... reasons xD.

It's all just an idea, though. My main focus is to finish Act 1 as it is now. Once that's done, I'll edit the whole thing again to add some scenes I missed and change others. I've already tweaked a few, in fact, although they aren't released in the public build yet. And perhaps... I'll add that friendship path and the secret RO. Truth be told, I love the idea and the dynamic the 'nameless' and the MC would have hehehe ;).

I'm very happy to hear you're enjoying the story, though! And that the characters are growing on you :D Thank you so much for the ask <3

#this was way longer than i expected i'm sorry lol #it doesn't take much to persuade me into talking xD #remnants of the past #interactive fiction #ask

[lalalian]

fantasy bakery dr | backstory

date: march 17, 2024

all about my drself (kinda)

haven't filled out my profile yet for this DR, but I haavvve thought of a backstory. It's not set in stone, but the backstory I've come up with on here will be available in the filled fantasy bakery dr script when it's done. It's always good to have options, right? Edit: I meant that if this backstory is scrapped, you'll at least be presented with this backstory as a second option if you don't like the other main backstory.

Once upon a time, there was a bit of a sheltered kid living on a small island in the Giant Clover Marsh. Many merchants from different kingdoms come to the bustling city next to the marsh to sell their goods. After living a slow but peaceful life for 18 years, suddenly, terrible news struck the small village I lived in.

"All residents located in the north, central, and eastern parts of the Giant Clover Marsh must evacuate the area in three weeks. Failure to do so will result in casualties."

All like... 12 residents of my village were heartbroken. Many had literally nowhere to go besides the heavily unstable southern and western areas of the marsh. Many of the villagers did not have the resources to move into the city, as it was far more expensive to live in. The solution we all collectively came up with is that everyone would pitch in as much coin as they could offer towards food, rent, and shelter in the city. We moved into a quaint building that was isolated from the stores and taverns. The realtor sold the building for cheap as the property was placed in an awkward position business-wise.

As soon as we moved in, we realized the establishment had a decent cafe area. Sure, it was pretty dusty, but the plumbing and the overall material of the structure seemed sturdy enough. As everyone got to cleaning and unpacking, an idea popped into my head.

"... what if... we set up a bakery and sold food for money...?"

Okay well, it's not the most creative idea, but it's worth a shot considering that nobody here has any kind of formal education. The next day, after inspecting the documents containing all the basic information about the safety of the building, I went over to the kitchen and began whipping up a simple but unique tart (it'll be called a clover cream tart). All the ingredients originated from the Giant Clover Marsh biome, which gave the tart a unique but palatable flavor.

Okay so I personally don't want to go out and like... sell the tart on my own cuz that would be embarrassing... so I'm planning to just work part-time in a pre-existing bakery, then sell my goods from there under the table. After selling 3-4 tarts, a customer comes into the cafe and asks if there's any clover cream tarts in stock today. Obviously, the cashier is going to be confused because... they've never stocked this dessert in their shop before. The customer will tell the cashier that they're sure they've ordered it from here. As they're arguing, I'll restock some of the muffins in the display shelf. Once the customer sees me, they'll ask me about the tarts... with guilt, I tell them that I make the tarts with my hometown's ingredients in my house and sell them here in the cafe.

At the end of the day, I'm immediately fired from the cafe for selling pastries under the table. The next day, I break the news to my family and the other villagers, but I'm suddenly interrupted by a knock at the door. I answered the door. The customer from earlier stood at the entrance with a few pouches of coins in their hands.

"Oh good, it's you. Listen... those tarts. You could make it big by selling those things. I'll sponsor you as long as you continue making them. Here, take this-- and by the gods, we need to fix up this mousey cafe..."

The first day I shift here will be the day after this whole story. Of course, the villagers living with me will be helping out by cleaning, gathering ingredients, and advertising in some way. This whole story would be around 1 week long... so 2 weeks before the marsh is flooded. The sponsor will make the cafe look presentable by changing up the interior and exterior + making sure that all the equipment is well-maintained and clean enough to use.

The goal is to come up with a unique but agreeable-tasting dessert before we run out of ingredients to make the clover cream tarts.

Yup. So... I'm literally starting from rock bottom in this DR.

Of course, I have some predestined locations I'll sneak off to to find some ingredients in my script, but I'll talk about that another day.

It's no fun if things aren't a little hard, right? Okay, well, that may just be me.

Happy Shifting! ♪(^∇^*)

[bonefall]

sorry I;m new and it's a lot to catch up on but can you briefly explain your better call mapleshade au?

Sure thing! As long as you don't mind that I'm gonna hijack your ask to answer a few other meta things at the same time! @katiek101 Rounding up your replies over here.

Btw never be afraid to just ask me questions about stuff, I need to update my Masterpost because I haven't added to it in a couple weeks but I'm always willing to just link people to stuff when asked!

What is the Better Call Mapleshade AU?

I summarized it in this reblog, which also contains @nightly-ruse design for BCM Mapleshade!

"Mapleshade is able to get into StarClan through a very slim ruling out of sympathy for the loss of her kits. She’s a prosecutor/defense attorney motivated by her own desire to be highly revered, playing as a literal “devil’s advocate“ against the awful choices we see StarClan make in canon.

In contrast to StarClan being the ‘council of well-meaning angels‘ who cause bad outcomes, Mapleshade is a self-concerned demon who makes good ones. Because of that, she looks somewhat out of place. An opposer for StarClan, a devil for a good cause.

The AU was born out of some joking with “Snowbird Anon” (hence the name #Better Call Mapleshade AU) and then evolved into an actual premise because my followers are literally the coolest"

It is separate from the #Bonefall Rewrite, but was inspired by aspects of it, namely a trial scene that is going to happen in Darkstar's Commandment.

though to be fair, I am considering just absorbing it into the rewrite. but for now they are still two separate, but related concepts

Do you plan to write/publish any aspects of the Bonefall Rewrite? Where would it be posted if so?

I WISH. Unfortunately I'm chronically unable to finish anything and only motivated by talking directly to people (I actually write first drafts of college essays in discord DMs). In a perfect world I would love to make full multi-chapter fics of the Super Edition rewrites such as Darkstar's Commandment and Firestar's Quietus, though.

Maybe one day, if I can speak to a psychiatrist! **laughs in undiagnosed neurodivergence**.

SO for now, everything is notes! Notes notes notes and rough drafts. The things I AM able to finish. If I ever wrote out anything, I would upload it to AO3. I promise I would make a post if that ever happens.

THE CURRENT NOTES I'M EDITING: Darkstar's Commandment, a follow-up story to Mapleshade's Vengeance, following Darkstar as she establishes the law about protecting kittens.

Blackstar, Russetfur, Rowanclaw

I powered through all of the "History Has Its Eyes On You" series in like 3 days between bus rides! I really like the take on them being a complicated couple (I keep thinking of that line, "their nests were as close as could be without being close at all") and my favorite story was the one where Russetfur went to bury Smokepaw.

Things are really different in my take, though! I see Blackstar as exclusively MLM and Russetfur is his WLW bestie. If Russet has children, they'll be honor dammed and raised by someone else.

I think you will quite like what I'm planning for Russetfur's death. It's a moment of deep pain for Blackstar that makes him relapse into some old, bad habits, leaving him wide open for Sol's influence.

Blackstar's sister Fernshade is going to have surviving children with Wolfstep (Ivytail is one of them, who eventually has Gullswoop), and I'm considering giving Flintfang a kitten or two as well. So there won't be a need for Blackstar to have kids anyway, besides, I like the idea that he's sort of Ivytail's embarrassing uncle, in a ShadowClan way where he's super intimidating to other clans.

And so Rowanclaw won't be part of that family... he is a son of Brokenstar. Same litter as Littlecloud, from Newtspeck. He will be bonding heavily with Tawnypelt over a shared experience of inheriting something VERY heavy.

Firestar's Quest with Brokenstar Details

The good deets are in this ask over here, but I really need to sit down and make a draft of it sometime soon. I'm held up on Darkstar's Commandment first, lmao

In a nutshell, Brokenstar was actually a nature spirit the whole time, the ghost of the 5th tree at Fourtrees. After the exile, the oak tree was blighted, fell over, and cracked on the highstone. It broke in the shape of Broken's tail; an omen of the curse that would befall them, revenge for the greatest sin of the clans.

This is (Brokenstar's Cataclysm)

After his death, he reconnects to these memories. In order for his restless spirit to finally be given peace, SkyClan must be resurrected. Runningnose enlists Firestar to help because he's such a little goody-goody two shoes and could never let an ancient wrong go unrighted. Hilarity ensues.

This is (Firestar's Quietus)

#Firestar's Quietus #Brokenstar's Cataclysm #Bonefall Rewrite #Blackfoot #Blackstar #Russetfur #Flintfang #Brokenstar #Firestar #Ivytail #Rowanclaw #Rowanstar #Littlecloud #Newtspeck #Better Call Mapleshade AU #Also I mean it! Feel free to ask me anything #I would like to consider myself an approachable person #I keep anon on (for now) exactly so people can ask questions they might find 'embarrassing' without fear #I don't mind linking to other posts or summarizing premises #Mapleshade

[tavyliasin]

 Of Living, Loving, and the Strangest of Bedfellows - A Tav's Guide to Fucking Across Faerun: Sordid Coast Edition (ATG)

Trying something new, scheduling full fic chapter drops on Tumblr throughout this month! They'll drop around the same time every day, and enable those without AO3 to read the full works. So we're starting with my ongoing series, which is usually shortened to ATG in the titles so that's how you'll see it referred to from here on in! The chapters will also all be reblogged on my side blog @atavsguide for anyone who wants an easy way to find the posts again!

----- General Notes About ATG, Tav, and The Story Overall

Who is the Tav in this Fic?

Named in the first chapter as "Tavylia Rugala", this was my first concept for a Tav who would be able to be known as Tav but with a little of her own unique identity. One which I promptly adopted as my Psuedonym. By the time we get to later chapters, I no longer refer to her as Tavylia, and just call her Tav, as Tavylia has become more my identity than hers, and I do not consider her to be a self-insert. Tav is a cis woman, a high elf (wood elf) Rogue with the Urchin background. Her parents were former adventurers, one leaving when she was very young and the other died of sickness before she was 10. Because Rogues with living parents is weird, and it makes for an interesting enough start, and gives her reasons for her personality.

More details follow!

------------ So, Why The Long Title?

When I started, it seemed fun, fairly accurate to the vibe I'm going for, and ATG (A Tav's Guide) is a nice little shortening of it.

What's the Plot?

The premise is following the game, approximately, with a few changes to spice it up or allow for a parallel story. There's a lot in the game to expand on, and to add flavour to. The idea really came from the amount of options there are to have sexual encounters in the game, and how that can be a premise for a character who is interested in experiencing all of this to actually do so in a believable way to their personality. Hence, ATG's Tav. She's bold, maybe a little too bold for her own good, but having lead a hard life her philosophy is one of living in the moment, taking what pleasures she can get in life. Love and Lust are separate entities to her, she is quite happy to have a meaningful relationship, but doesn't need one to have good sex. And with the full agreement and ongoing communication with a romantic partner, she is confident indulging in sexual endeavours outside of the relationship, or even having a full polyamorous relationship if the context is right. So we will have the canon sex scenes, along with a few extras that I felt we were cheated out of (Raphael, please, just let me smooch the old devil). The main romance is Astarion, there will be poly involvement with Halsin, and I will try to cover every canon sex scene available in that setup along with some extras and canon-divergent relationship building amongst the characters.

How Long Will ATG Be?

Currently I am at 13 main chapters, and in Act 3 of the story. I think we can go to around 20 chapters to cover the pairings and story beats I intended, with a few fun spinoffs and side stories.

AMA!

Ask me anything about ATG, Tav, the pairings, characters, story, or anything else around the fic in the comments below~ I'll read and respond to all of them.

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 fanfiction #bg3 tav #a tav's guide #ATG

[nebulousfishgills]

I'll hang with you, friend! Have a few of these to chew on:

FMK, Jamie edition: Henry Creel, Jace Wayland, and whatever his Twilight character is (haven't seen Twilight lol)

Would you rather spend a year in the Stranger Things universe or a year in the Twilight universe? assuming that you're human, but have a reasonable degree of possibility to get powers somehow (so like... if you want to be a vampire, you could try to get converted but they might also just kill you)

You're visited by the writer genie, but they'll only grant one wish. Which do you pick?

1. You're able to transcribe the story exactly as it is in your brain, but motivation is just as it is now (so you'll probably end up with writer's block at some point)

2. You never get writer's block again, but that means you get intensely motivated to write at exactly the wrong time (i.e., in class, about to go to bed, etc.)

3. You get wide, positive reception for everything you post and comments on every fic, but some people BADLY misinterpret your characters and you literally can't do anything about that

Favorite things: your writing style is incredible, and you're not afraid to add genuine darkness to your storylines. You also stay really true to Henry's character and make it clear that he's still a villain, but you're able to implement these moments where we start to care about him all the same. It's really impressive, and makes for an addictive story! And even outside your writing, you're a really lovely person and I'm glad we've struck up a friendship here

Tiny vent: I have one fic that I'm honestly really proud of (the characters are unique and dynamic, there's an interesting plot, the writing is some of my better prose), but it has gotten ZERO attention whatsoever. I realize it's because it's written in a very small and underappreciated fandom, and OC x canon fics aren't always the most widely-received anyway, but I really wish people would give it a chance because I really think they'd enjoy it if they did. The worst part is that I can see a few people have bookmarked or subscribed to it, but I haven't gotten a single comment (not even one of those "this is great!" or "extra kudos" or whatever). I'm trying not to let it kill my motivation because I really do like this story, but it's starting to make me sad :/

Thanks for "hanging out with me," bestie lol. Luckily my isolation window for Miss Rona is over and I'm feeling better 😷. Anyways, let's see what we have here...

FMK - Henry Creel, Jace Wayland, Caius Volturi...

Bestie you're killing me here. You're actually killing me. It changes depending on my mood, of course, but if I had to pick the most constant idea... F Henry, Marry Caius, Kill Jace

I'm sorry

Would you rather - Spend a year in the Stranger Things universe or spend a year in the Twilight universe, both with a reasonable chance of gaining powers...

Hmm... that's a good question. Again, this very much depends on my mood, but I might have to go with the Stranger Things universe. I would honestly need an essay to explain why that would ultimately be like many of my college essays: four pages of nothing. Some days I think living in the twilight universe would be fun, but right now the Stranger Things universe seems like the "safer" option, relatively speaking.

A Visit From the Writer Genie - It's between 1 and 2, but I think I'll go with 1 becaus 2 tbh is not that different to how I operate now. I do most of my writing at like, 1 AM (as my roommate could likely vouch for) and I have done writing during class. But I'd love to just implant text right to the page, that'd be wonderful.

Favorite Thing - Bestie, your comments are some of the best things I have gotten, and it really means a lot that you enjoy those facets of my writing. I like to say that it's my blessing-and-a-curse empathy that lets me get characterizations right because I find that I'm very good at reading and interpreting characters, even for little shitpost things. And I, too, am very glad we struck up such a lovely friendship. I love making friends in my little Tumblr-sphere :)

Vent Reply - Aww, I'm sorry! Low engagement is the worst when you're very proud of what you've written. That by no means diminishes your worth as a writer, though. I bet it's a really amazing fic! In fact, I'll add it to my list. It's the least I can do.

Thanks for "hanging out" with me lol. It's been an incredibly hard few days, so it really means a lot that you decided to pop in :3

#fishgills speaks #ask game #come hang out with me #fishgills writing #beloved mutuals #my inbox is open

[saiilorstars]

Ch.5: The Worldwide Initiative

Steve Rogers x OFC fic • squeeze your eyes for a Bucky Barnes x (2nd) OFC

taglist: @ocappreciationtag​​​​​​​​​​​​ @arrthurpendragon​​​​​​​​​​​ @anotherunreadblog​​​​​​​​​​​ @maaaaarveeeeel​​​​​​​​​​​ @stareyedplanet​​​​​​​​​​​ @gloryekaterina​​​ @averyhotchner​​​ @foxesandmagic​​​​​​​​​​​​ @lenonizi@kmc1989​​​​​​​​​​​​

Story Masterlist • Seren’s Masterlist• Chloe’s Masterlist​​

Also available on Fanfic ○ Ao3 ○ Wattpad

If you’d like to be a part of this OC’s work/edits, let me know!

Seren rocked on her feet so many times that she might end up breaking her own heels. She couldn't help it — she was beyond nervous. She was introducing her new team to the World Security Council and the evening was already in march.

"If you don't quit doing that, you'll be shoeless by midnight." Her director came by to stand beside her. Seren eyed the glass in Rebeca's hand. How Rebeca was so casual was beyond Seren. "And I don't need Cinderella, I need Agent Seren Soul right now, even though you do look like Cinderella right now."

Seren could only minimally laugh before the nerves crept in her stomach again. Several people had already arrived at the event. Waiters were passing by tables, offering drinks. Everything was casual, except for Seren herself. "I have been working my ass for the past 2 years and if the Council says 'no' then it was all a waste."

"They won't say 'no'," Rebeca shook her head. "They would be idiots if they did."

"Never stopped them before."

Rebeca nearly choked on her drink. "Ouch. Keep that one to yourself, alright? That might make them refuse to expand the Initiative."

Seren flushed with embarrassment. She hadn't meant to let that one slip but her thoughts about the Council had never been the best. She was too wary of them. She knew there were secrets under secrets when it came to the Council, even if Fury said it was all for their security. And being who she was, a potential threat as once stated 2 years ago, she felt like she would never be able to fully trust the Council.

"Simply speak about what the Initiative means to you and we'll be fine," Rebeca patted Seren's arm. "Drink?"

Seren shook her head at the offered glass and walked a little bit off. She could see the very team that she'd be talking about later on coming through the entrance doors.

Risha, Jordan, Blake and Alison were the lucky overseas versions of the Avengers' Initiative. More than a team, Seren looked at them as close friends. They'd been working heavily and close for too long to be anything but friends now.

"This looks great." Risha, the team's own leader, looked around with the biggest smile on her face. Seren thought it was better for Risha to be excited than nervous like she was. "Is the Council already here?"

"No," Seren shook her head. "But they'll be here soon."

"So what happens?" Blake was more on the nervous side like Seren. "Are we...are we supposed to speak to anyone?"

"Only if you want to," Seren said clearly. "But I'll be the one handling the questions. Of course I can't promise what'll happen afterwards."

"Can we have drinks first?" asked Jordan, the most calm of the team so far. He seemed completely ready which is what allowed Seren to think that perhaps she'd done a good job preparing them for this.

"Yes, of course," she chuckled but stopped when she spotted some familiar faces coming in. "Actually, before you go, there's a few people I want you to meet. Maybe it'll make things less nerve-wrecking for some of you later on."

"I'll try anything," Alison said with a hand rubbing endlessly over her stomach.

Seren brought them to meet Natasha first. It seemed only right since Natasha had been the first person Seren ever got to work with closely after turning 18.

"So you're the ones who took Seren away," Natasha shook hands with all of them. "I hope you're as good as she said you are."

"Natasha likes being very sarcastic sometimes," Seren chuckled nervously. Natasha almost laughed too when she felt Seren's gripping hand on her shoulder. She was silently being asked to tone it down. "But she's one of the best agents at S.H.I.E.L.D., definitely somebody you don't want to cross."

Natasha winked at the several nervous faces now staring at her. "You'll be fine kids. You had Seren training you. She's one of the best. Oh look, there's Fury right now," she pointed at the man making his way around a few other guests.

"Oh God no!" Alison shook her head with absolute fear. "Do we have to speak directly to him?" She turned to Seren, hopelessly helpless which was more than amusing for the others.

"Calm down Ally," Risha moved over to her side. "We'll be fine. What Agent Romanoff said is true. We had the best Agent training us." She cast a warm smile towards Seren.

"Nicely put," Natasha said. "Can I have a moment with your star trainer?" Seren playfully rolled her eyes at the redhead. Natasha waited for the trainees to leave before she spoke again. "So, I don't see your family around. Not even Agent Atria."

"Yeah I wouldn't waste time searching for them," Seren sighed. "Mom and Dad were never on board with me leaving and they especially don't like this whole scene."

"And grandma?"

"She never trusts the Council."

Natasha thought that was fair, very fair. "Mm, Steve and Chloe are coming in. They might be busy though…"

Seren followed her gaze to see the pair trying to make their way inside but whether or not he wanted it, Steve always grabbed attention. Seren learned quickly that she hated the people the attention came from. "I'll be attending to my team," she told Natasha rather quietly.

Natasha watched Seren go off in her put-out way and barely held the edges of her mouth from curving into a smirk. It was too damn obvious sometimes and even that wasn't enough.

~ 0 ~

It was much later when Chloe was able to find Seren without any of her trainees around her. "You're a very needed woman," Chloe laughed as she hugged Seren. "Haven't been able to get a word with you."

"Busy," Seren said and brought her current glass of champagne to her lips. "As are you guys."

"Mm, not so much me. You know that I hate attention. I prefer to stick to the shadows."

"Do you do that with Tony a lot?" Seren's question startled Chloe and even though she tried shaking it off with another laugh, Seren didn't fall for it. "Steve's told me you've been weird lately, and then he got the idea that you might be sneaking around to see Tony. What's that about?"

Chloe visibly gulped. "Well, I…I've just been busy, that's all."

Seren looked at Chloe long and hard. While her haze never wavered, Chloe's stance became shifty. Whether or not Chloe liked it, Seren had the ability to create a faux motherly glare.

"Have you been seeing Stark about your condition?" There was no room in Seren's tone for an argument or an excuse.

Chloe swallowed thickly again. "Is this really what you want to talk about right now?"

"I'm nervous as hell and you're dodging me at every corner, so yeah," Seren nodded. "What have you been up to, Chloe?"

Chloe pressed her tongue against the side of her cheek. "You know Tony, he's just a...very rich man with a lot of curiosity. I don't think it's odd that he'd be interested in what goes on in my head."

"So he is studying your condition?" Seren raised an eyebrow. "S.H.I.E.L.D. does that already. What could Tony tell you that S.H.I.E.L.D. hasn't?"

"That's what I'm seeing," said Chloe. "Plus, don't tell anyone, but he's kind of making me a suit."

"A suit?"

"Yeah, and don't worry, he's making one for you too."

"Ah, great," Seren drank from her glass again. "So, again, why isn't this common information? Steve is worried about you and he swears you won't tell him anything."

"I just didn't want to make more problems," Chloe said quickly as an excuse. "You know how they are when they're together."

"Why wouldn't you tell me about it then?" Seren watched as Chloe faltered again. "We're supposed to be best friends and yet in these 2 years I've been away, you never once mentioned to me that you're having problems with your powers."

"I…Seren, c'mon, you've been so busy and I — I just didn't want to add more to your plate!" Chloe said, smiling awkwardly.

"No matter how stressed I am, I always want to know how you're doing," Seren said sternly. "And to tell you the truth, right now I get what Steve was trying to tell me. You're acting strange, Chloe."

"I-I'm not—"

"You might get away with it because Steve doesn't know you like I do. I know you're hiding something and starting tomorrow, you and I are going to sit down and discuss everything." Once again, Seren's voice held no room for arguments. Chloe's fate was sealed.

Chloe let out a long breath. "Honestly, Seren, this is your night and you're making it all about me!"

"I'm multitasking!" Seren finally drowned the remainder of her drink and quickly sought out another waiter.

Chloe had never seen Seren be so willing when it came to alcohol. In less than a minute, Seren had gone halfway with her second drink. "Are you okay?" Chloe asked. This was supposed to be one of the most important nights of Seren's life after all.

Seren couldn't answer without giving implications but Chloe would be damned if Seren left her on hold like that. She took Seren's glass and held it behind her back when Seren tried taking it back. "What is it?"

It probably wouldn't have been that hard to keep in if it wasn't killing Seren to watch it. In the end, she let out a breath. "I forgot how hard it was sometimes to talk to Steve outside of home and S.H.I.E.L.D."

Chloe looked back and chuckled when he saw Steve still being bombarded by several people. "I know, it's so funny." But when she shifted her gaze back to Seren, she realized it wasn't that funny for her. "You're mad—"

"I am not mad," Seren snapped, trying to reach for her drink.

Chloe easily stretched her arm high above her head to where Seren had no hope of getting it. "Sounds like you're mad to meee!" Chloe sing-sung.

Seren huffed and gave up winning her drink back. "It happened the last time we went out too," Seren said, her abrupt change of subjects showing just a bit more of a deep angry feeling. "We were trying to get simple curry and this...this waitress just kept coming to our table. She gave some crappy excuses but I knew she was just there to chat up with Steve. I swear everybody acts like they want him."

"Uh, hello!?" Chloe thumped Seren on the side of her head.

"Ow!"

"Everybody does want him!" Chloe rolled her eyes. "You're the last one to find out! Right now you're talking to one of the few people who don't want to sleep with him."

Seren scrunched her face and shook her head. "Chloe!"

"I'm telling you how it is! I swear Seren that you're incredibly smart but so stupid at the same time!" Some tough love is what Seren needed right now. Chloe put Seren's glass on the nearest table then set her hands on Seren's shoulders. "We all know that you and Steve decided to stay friends but that's not really working out for either of you." Seren scoffed but Chloe kept a firm grip on her shoulders to keep her there. "You really don't see it? You're dying of jealousy and when you're not looking, Steve mopes around because you're not here."

"...I'm not dying of jealousy," muttered Seren.

"No, you're just seething with it."

Seren's eyes snapped to Chloe's. "Please..." she ended up sighing. She had no energy to argue and, if she was being honest with herself, she had nothing to argue with. Chloe, despite her fantastic way of putting it, was absolutely right. "Do you think I made the wrong choice?" she suddenly asked. "Two years ago, I told Steve that we had no time for a relationship. I was on the other side of the world — I probably will be after this too — and I couldn't bind him to a relationship like the one we would have."

Chloe tilted her head at Seren, not really giving Seren an idea of what she was thinking. "I get why you did it but has it really done any good to either of you?"

Seren shrugged. "I've done a lot with my time in London and I know Steve has done some good here."

"Yeah, no one's going to argue that but you guys are miserable because you can't move on from each other." Chloe couldn't imagine herself ever being in a situation like that. She was always very straightforward with what she wanted. She was the one who ended up asking her last boyfriend in high school out on a date. She wasn't much for pinning.

"I didn't know it was going to be like this," Seren admitted. "I thought time and distance would be exactly what we needed to...to forget. I have never been in a situation like this." She hardly dated in her teen years because she was always trying to keep herself under the radar and even when she was older and more situated with S.H.I.E.L.D., she never dated seriously. "I was supposed to move on and-and I don't know, go back to normal, but I haven't! Nothing's gone back to normal and I hate it! I hate feeling like this!" Chloe chuckled lightly, and in her state Seren took it with annoyance. "Am I amusing to you right now?"

"Seren, you don't get why you can't move on?" Chloe tilted her head at Seren. "You really don't know?"

Seren's shoulders slumped at the question. It was clear as day that she knew the answer. "Of all the people…"

"Don't do that," Chloe cut her off. "Don't do the 'of all the people in the world, why did I have to go and choose him?' It's a pointless question with no answer. You don't get to pick. It happens, and it happened because it was supposed to."

"I was supposed to fall in love with some guy from the 40s?" Seren smiled sourly. "I couldn't have just picked someone—"

Chloe didn't even let Seren finish again. "Most of the time, you were afraid to date. You were afraid of how men would see you once they learned about you. I don't think you've really thought about that stuff with Steve, have you?"

"I mean…sometimes…"

"But in the end, it doesn't matter because Steve's not exactly the most normal guy out there either. I think this was fate and you trying to act like it's not is just plain stupid."

"So what am I supposed to do?" Seren nabbed her drink from the table and drank it before Chloe even blinked.

"Well for starters, maybe you shouldn't get drunk before you talk to the Council?" Chloe sarcastically shrugged. "And then maybe just talk to Steve? Trust me, he's willing to listen."

Seren sighed. "Even if I did talk to him about it, what am I supposed to say? That I'm taking back everything I said 2 years ago? I can't...that's not fair to him, Chloe. I don't even know if I'm going to be here after this. They want me in France."

"Do you want to be in France?"

Seren swallowed hard and took to biting her bottom lip. Time was, she knew exactly what she wanted but lately that wasn't the case anymore. Her eyes drifted over to Steve who was currently having a conversation with a few people. She could say with certainty that the only thing she knew right now was that she wanted him.

Chloe presumed where Seren's thoughts went and because she loved Seren, she decided to help her out a bit. "Stay here," she patted Seren's arm then headed off in Steve's direction.

Seren dreaded what Chloe would do. "N-n-no, Chloe!" she whisper-hissed after the blonde. "Come back!"

Chloe only flashed a smirk then headed off, leaving Seren with a near heart attack. She cleared her throat loudly once she was close enough to the group. "Scuse me, scuse me, Agent Winters here — back off vultures!" She practically shoved two women in her way. They were a bit too close to Steve anyways.

As always, Steve was amused with her. "Hey Chloe," he said and, though he didn't say it, he was relieved that she was able to get him some space.

"You seem popular tonight," Chloe crossed her arms.

"Not my fault," he was quick to say. "But I did slip in as much as I could about Seren."

"I'm sure you did," Chloe laughed. "Have you gotten a chance to talk to her yet?"

"No, it's been cra—"

"You should, she's not doing that great!" Chloe's smirk widened when Steve grew concerned in record time. "Nervous, you know? I think it would do her some good to have some support from the Golden Boy."

Steve rolled his eyes at her. "I already told Natasha not to call me that."

"Just go and make sure she doesn't screw up her night." Chloe made a motion of someone over-drinking and that was definitely enough to make Steve take off. He knew that it took Seren a bit longer to get drunk than the average human but the point still stood that she could get drunk. She would hate herself forever if she did that to herself tonight of all nights.

Seren had just accepted a new glass from a waiter when he finally found her. Just as she was about to drink from it, he swooped in and took the glass from her. Their height difference would prove a challenge for her to get it back.

"We need to talk," he announced.

"Oh God, what did Chloe say?" Seren felt her heart was about to burst from her chest.

"That you're nervous and you're over-drinking."

Okay, so Chloe hadn't completely ruined her...yet. Seren took in a breath to ease her nerves. "It's a big night and I find myself confused about some things." That technically was true — very true, actually.

"I'm sure you'll do fine," Steve said with all the certainty in the world. "You always do. You've been training these guys for two years and the Council knows it needs more Agents like you."

"Thanks," Seren whispered, though she still didn't look more cheered up like Steve would've wanted her to be.

She looked so pretty tonight and she wasn't remotely happy. How on earth was that okay?

She folded her arms over her chest and looked away from him. She was in a soft blue satin dress with a cowl neckline and thin straps. Her new star pendant rested around her neck, shining constantly with each of her movements. While it covered one of her star birthmarks, her second birthmark was on her right shoulder, just where her arm began. It was the smallest of stars, but still very present. Steve knew she was a lot more self conscious about it than she let on, and so she didn't really expose it that much. He thought it suited her well because she was just that: a star.

When Seren accepted yet another glass from a waiter, Steve sprung into action.

"Hey!" Seren was tired of her drinks getting stolen by tall people.

"Let's save that for another day," Steve said in a rush. "Can I ask you to dance?"

"What—?" Seren froze altogether, only her eyes flickered to the side. She wondered if Chloe had told him — or forced him— to do this.

"I promise I'll try my best to not step on your feet…" Steve said, offering her a smile, "But if I do, feel free to step on me."

Seren laughed on the spot. It was a huge win.

She reached for his hand and walked with him. "I'm wearing heels," she remarked.

"I know…"

"So you know that if I step on you, I'm gonna stab you."

"Yeah, that I didn't connect…" Somehow, Steve was sure he'd survive it. The moment was very worth the risk. He held her just like the last time they danced together, only this time he knew he couldn't do what he did last time. Kissing was strictly off the table.

Maybe Seren was thinking something similar to that because she kept looking around. "It's concerning that I've lost sight of Chloe…" she mumbled. She could no longer see where Chloe had gotten off to and that meant she could be doing things in secret. "You know you were right. She's seeing Stark about her powers."

"And neither one mentioned a thing," Steve said, discreetly taking a look around as well. "How very surprising."

"Chloe swears that she didn't want to bother anyone…"

"And what do you think?"

"I think there's something going on that she doesn't want us to know about. I might be visiting Stark in the near future. I'd invite you but I don't want you to kill each other."

Steve smirked. "You say it like it's my fault the guy's insufferable."

"You two could stand to tolerate each other better," Seren said, finally meeting his eye. "If Stark is truly trying to help Chloe, then we'd be on the same team—again."

"Would you be willing to work with him, then?'

"I guess. At the end of the day, he's not a bad guy. Just has some flaws like everyone else."

Steve had to agree, as much as it pained him. "I'm just surprised that Chloe managed to get Tony to help her out."

Seren hummed then chuckled. "Oh, Chloe can charm her way into anything." She happened to look around again and, to her relief, and maybe to prove her point, she found Chloe. She was at the center of the reporters, and to the side was Natasha shaking her head. "Oh brother, she goes," Seren said with another laugh.

Steve followed Seren's gaze and saw what was happening. He had a laugh or two as well. "You know, she makes it look easy. The limelight is terrible."

Seren's eyes flickered to him suddenly. "You looked quite at home to me earlier."

"What? Before?" Steve blinked. Seren nodded. "That's not home to me. I'd much rather be in my actual home or with our friends. Maybe some curry on the side…?" He waited until Seren couldn't hold it back and smiled. "There we go — you should be just like this when you speak to the Council. Nobody can deny you anything when you smile like that."

Seren felt her face warm up. "Thanks for coming." She realized she hadn't shown her gratitude to him until now. "I wouldn't admit this to anyone else but I kind of wished my parents were here. I've worked on this assignment for 2 years and if this goes as planned, I will have created — recreated — one of the most important Initiatives that S.H.I.E.L.D. struggled to take off the first time around."

"Despite your differences I think that they'd be proud of you." Though Steve wouldn't say that he was irritated neither of her parents showed up for this, he wanted to believe that they were indeed proud of Seren's accomplishments. "Even Atria hadn't come tonight, after all.

Seren nodded. "Well...I'm happy that you're here," she said with a tint of pink on her cheeks. "My backup, right?"

"Of course. You know I've been talking you up to those people," Steve nodded towards the group that Chloe had finally disbanded. "Every last good thing about you. They're primed and ready."

"Thank you, that means a lot."

"So you want to tell me why you were so upset earlier now?"

Seren's face felt even hotter when she remembered her alleged jealousy. "Um…" she cleared her throat, "No, I…I was just…so nervous. Very nervous."

"You shouldn't be, because you've done amazing. You'll be great tonight. And after, when everything goes great, maybe we can celebrate with some curry or some sweet cinnamon rolls?"

Seren would have liked to say that just how Steve claimed no one could deny her anything, she couldn't deny him anything either...not when he had those charming eyes of his. "I'd like that," she found herself nodding.

"Good, and the only requisite is that you can't have another drink tonight," Steve laughed as Seren groaned.

"I literally can't get drunk!"

"Not taking any chances tonight, sweetheart." As soon as the last word left his mouth, Steve regretted it out of sheer fear of her reaction. When he looked at Seren, she was smiling softly at him. Her heart had pinged in the best of ways.

~ 0 ~

It was funny how the nerves seemed to fade the more Seren talked about what her last 2 years in London had been about. The trainees had gathered behind her while she addressed the guests. The Council, though menacing, hadn't opposed anything so far. It was a good sign that Seren would take for encouragement.

"Risha Taylor here" — she gestured to the young woman in question — "is an expert in combat and communications. She is no doubt the perfect leader for a special team like this." Risha herself stepped up beside Seren. "She was the first candidate I chose and moved through every challenge I posed for her—"

"Couldn't that have been a rushed decision on your part, Agent Soul?" One Councilwoman suddenly interjected. It caught Risha by surprise but Seren didn't falter.

She put on a smile instead. "Not at all. Before choosing her, I screened thousands of candidates for the position. Risha went through extensive one-on-one reviews and training before I gave her the title of Leader. I don't make 'rushed decisions', Councilwoman Hawley." Seren's smile was strained but authoritative — she was not to be challenged. She had dealt with the Council on various occasions in the past. "Being constantly trained since I was a kid for this very Initiative has given me a very apt perspective on this matter. It is why Director Fury—" she made a motion to the very man standing beside the Council, "—proposed that I oversee this assignment."

"Some would say that your young age has made you a little biased instead," Councilman Yen said. "This is what you know so...how do we know that your team is truly ready for the assignments that may come their way?"

"Because I have the exams to prove it," Seren responded nearly sarcastically. Some of these questions felt redundant. "I'm not just talking the talk — I'm walking the walk."

Chloe smirked. She was glad to see that Seren was forgetting those nerves and sticking it to the Council. "I love that woman…" Her eyes then drifted towards the Council who didn't seem so amused with Seren's metaphor. "I always hate these people," she whispered at her lowest to Steve and Natasha on either side of her.

"Can they be trusted?" Steve felt like his question was pretty much answered by the mere appearances of the Council. Not one of them cracked even half of a smile. "I don't understand, why wouldn't they want the Initiative to be a success again?"

"Because the Council has never been on-board having half-alien Agents in S.H.I.E.L.D.," Natasha said just as another member stopped Seren again in the middle of her explanation for Joshua's position. "She and Atria are seen as potential threats should they turn to the, uh, dark side." Chloe giggled at Natasha's tone.

"Seren would never," Steve could almost roll his eyes at the absurd idea.

"Yeah, but think about if she did?" Natasha flashed him a smirk. "She's twice as strong as the rest of us — rivaling you — and she has literal star powers. She's a threat if she wants to be one. She proved it the last time."

"Nonsense," Chloe stuck her tongue out, though she quickly pulled back in when Steve shot her a look to control herself.

Seren, however, answered the series of questions thrown her way without a slight indication that she was uncomfortable anymore. "I assure you that I have chosen my team with the utmost caution and logical reasoning. Each member I chose brings a different specialty to the team. They function as a whole, just as a team should."

"But the original team — your team, I should add — didn't necessarily follow that logic," one of the male Councilmen, Rockwell, remarked. "How can we be sure that this team of yours won't disband like yours did?"

Seren cocked her head to the side, having to bite her tongue before something unprofessional slipped out. She didn't realize how irritated she was until now. "Well, Councilman Rockwell, first of all — unlike the original team, this team wasn't brought into a room and expected to work as a team in the course of one day. They all met once they were each individually trained and ready to combine their training. They have had 2 years to perfect their weaknesses using one another for help. My original team was not so lucky. I was the only member who had extensive training specifically for the task of the Initiative. Agents Romanoff and Barton had their training for different assignments. Mr. Stark was made terribly confused by denying him the position and then proceeding to pull him in anyways as if nothing happened. Captain Rogers was a bit preoccupied learning to live in our world to focus completely on the Initiative. And last, but not least, it was decided to bring Dr. Banner to an enclosed, glorified, ship where he could Hulk out at any moment. So if we didn't stay together, it wasn't because we failed the Initiative. We were never made to be on the same page. This team—" Seren pointed behind her to the trainees, "—has had every opportunity that we didn't. That is why they will not fail. Any more questions?"

Seren was glad to see nobody had a thing to say. She did, however, meet the proud gazes of her friends.

~ 0 ~

"Okay, I know that I'm the leader but...how will I ever be like you?" Risha was finally letting all of the nerves she held in during the questioning go. Seren could only laugh at her. "I'm serious! The Council is scary and you just shut them up!"

"I honestly wasn't intending on things going in that direction," Seren said, raising her hands. "But they asked, and I answered with nothing but the truth."

"And you killed it!" Chloe called. She, Steve and Natasha were coming over to congratulate Seren and the team now that they were mostly freed up from the other guests. "

"No I don't," Seren rolled her eyes then, for her team's benefit — since they were quite new to the business — she added, "There are no dirty secrets."

"I don't know," Alison said with a face to match her doubt. "People like them always have dirty secrets."

"Oh, you're going to be a good one," Natasha pointed. "Keep your eyes open, kid." Alison fervently nodded her head.

"Please don't scare off my team," Seren sighed.

"They won't," Steve assured her and, for good measure, warned Natasha to stay quiet from now on. "You were great, Seren." The ginger beamed with his praise. "They were going hard on you but you knew exactly what you were doing."

"I was nervous up until they started asking me stupid questions," Seren admitted with a light chuckle to follow. "I stopped mostly because I was irritated with them. I guess that was better in the end."

"I'm sure that they'll approve of the team and the Initiative's expand."

"I hope so," Seren looked at the trainees with a soft smile. "I think they've earned it."

"What exactly happens if they do?" Joshua curiously asked her. They had briefly touched on the next steps if they were to gain the Council's approval but now that it was so close, he wanted to know exactly what would be changing. "Do we...do we actually take assignments now? Official ones?"

"Well, for starters, I wouldn't be coming anymore," Seren chuckled at his horrified expression. "Risha would be leading you guys."

"Why are you making that face?" Risha frowned at the man who had yet to clear said face up. "Are you trying to say that I'm not a good leader?"

"I just...it would be very different going from Seren's leadership to yours," Joshua said quickly when he felt his life was on the line.

"Mhm," Risha rolled her eyes.

Seren gestured for the two to calm down. "Anyways, if we do get the approval you would be officially based in London and should anything...special happen...you would be the first ones called."

"You mean like anything alien-wise?" Alison raised an eyebrow.

"Not all the time. Any mission that's important, you'd be on the first jet there."

"What if...what if we don't get the approval?" Blake seemed afraid to pose the question but Seren wasn't at all upset by it. It was a fair thing to think about.

"Then you would go back to your current positions," she answered quietly. The answer wasn't very well received.

"Noo, I don't like it," Risha shook her head. "Not after everything we've done these 2 years."

"You shouldn't focus on that," Seren said quickly. "Your training, whether or not we get the approval, will be enough to get you through the levels and ranks. Plus, you've made friends with each other. You'll be good with either possibility. But you know what? You've all done such an incredible job — go out. Please, just go out and have some fun."

"How about you come with us?" Alison beamed.

"No, I'm...I'm tired," Seren chuckled at her admission. "I think I need a nice calm night for me. I foresee some nice cinnamon rolls in my future." She didn't necessarily look over to see what Steve had to say about it but he was all smiles about it.

Chloe and Natasha may have seen it, though.

There was at least another 15 minutes of saying goodbyes and promises to let them know what the Council decided on. Seren even had a moment with Fury and Rebeca to talk about the chances of getting that approval. It was where she delayed her departure.

"I did what I could," she said to the pair. "But maybe I overdid it with my attitude towards the end."

"No, you did exactly what you should've," Rebeca wagged a finger at the woman. "You need to show that you are strong and you're not the type to back down, not even for the Council. Isn't that right, Fury?"

The man himself shook his head. "No, some of them appreciate that."

"But others don't," Seren picked up on the unsaid words.

"Agent Soul, you have done your job," Fury said. "Do not forget that. I have confidence that they will give you the approval you need. And after that, my guess is that you'll be packing for France." Seren's face slowly fell with the reminder, even more so with Fury's certainty. "They've been keeping an extremely close eye on the matter."

"So...so if that were to happen...how long would I be in France?" Seren couldn't help her fingers from fiddling together. She was back to being nervous.

"I would think the same amount you spent in London, of course," Rebeca answered cheerily, none the wiser of Seren's grim thoughts. "I think you established the period of 2 years being roughly the amount you need to develop a team. But imagine it, Seren, if this happens then France is just going to be the next stop of many."

"Many…" Seren repeated, eyes drifting to the side. "Yeah…"

"What's the matter, Agent Soul?" asked Fury. "It would be the opportunity of a lifetime for you to oversee the Worldwide Initiative."

"It's just…" Seren didn't know how to put her thoughts into coherent words. How would she speak of her concerns of her life and not make it sound selfish? Yes, it would be a good opportunity for her but at the same time she had to consider what she would be giving up this time. If she was always traveling then it meant less time to see her family, her friends...and anything else she might have been considering.

"Seren?" Rebeca reached to touch Seren's arm, startling the woman out of her thoughts. "Are you alright?"

Seren pulled her arm from Rebeca's hand and put on her best smile. "Of course, yeah. Um, you'll let me know what happens, right?"

"Of course," Rebeca nodded. "Are you sure you're—"

Seren bid her and Fury a goodnight and headed off. She had a lot to think about and with so little time too. She was almost to the entrance doors for some well needed air when she heard her name called. As soon as she heard him, her nerves found the will to ease up.

"We lost you there for a bit," Steve was smiling as usual, something Seren felt like she really needed at the moment. Nastasha and Chloe were following behind. "We saw you talking to Fury and Rebeca. Is everything—"

"I don't know," Seren cut him off without intending to. She swallowed hard. "I-I really don't know what I'm doing or what I'm going to do—"

"Woah, hey!" Steve held her by the arms. "What's happened? I thought you were good?"

"I am but at the same time I'm no-ot." The fact her voice cracked in the end was a red alarm.

"Seren, ease up," Steve started rubbing his hands down her arms. "Whatever is going on, we can help. Natasha, Chloe and I — we're here for whatever you need."

"Yeah, what do you need from us?" Chloe soon asked.

"I just want to go," Seren bit on her bottom lip. "I've had my fill for tonight."

"Not home, is it?" Natasha's question was odd and certainly earned her some looks. "You know there's going to be people there waiting for you to ask questions." Seren felt 10 times more tired than a minute ago.

"Why don't you come with us instead?" suggested Chloe who then looked to Steve for his reaction. "She can stay with us for a bit, right?"

"Of course," he nodded. His hands dropped from Seren's arms to her hands. As he wrapped them around hers, Seren fought the urge to just take him in an entire hug. "You want to come home with us?"

"If...if it's not too much of a bother." No sooner had Seren said those words than Chloe snorted in the background. Natasha promptly jabbed her elbow in her ribs.

"I heard cinnamon rolls were going to be served," Natasha then said. "How about Chloe and I get them and meet you at your place?"

"Sounds good," Steve said, thanking them for the initiative. "Seren?"

"Thanks," she whispered.

"Here," Chloe said suddenly and pulled out a nice small box from her purse. Seren took it, although puzzled with its contents. "It's chocolates," Chloe explained. "Somebody left them for me at my table. A little sweetness might do you some good."

Seren smiled lightly. "Leave it to you to have secret admirers at my dinner."

"Hey, there were a lot of cute guys in the room," Chloe flipped her hair behind her shoulders. "I can't help what I can't control."

Seren chuckled. "Thanks, Chloe." She held the box close to her chest then glanced at Steve. Without saying anything, he knew she wanted to leave now.

So, they left together.

Natasha waited until the pair were gone to ask Chloe what she already presumed was going to happen. "We're not actually going to meet up with them later, right?"

"Noo," Chloe said with a smirk on her face. "But Seren's suite is going to be empty, so…" She held up Seren's hotel room card.

Natasha laughed. "Sometimes, you're good, Winters. I got the wine."

#ocappreciation #marvelocsdaily #fyeahsuperverseocs #ochub #allaboutocs #marvel #mcu #avengers #captain america #steve rogers #steve rogers fics #steve rogers x oc #avengers fics #avengers imagines #mcu fics #mcu imagines #marvel fics #marvel imagines #captain america fics #captain america imagines #captain america x oc #oc: seren soul #oc: stardust #fic: alignment

[dethkomic]

Writin' Comics and Junk: Part 1 - Getting Absolutely Started

As usual... I've been going on and on and on about doing more tutorials/at-length discussion on my writing process with Dethkomic... and I say it's high time I got around to doing that!

But first... A few announcements:

Dethkomic's next update will be Tuesday, March 7th, 2023! Be there!

A couple more days remain to get your OCs in for the open casting call! Note me with those!

And we now have a significantly more fleshed-out entry on just what the heck Dethkomic is, over at fanlore! Check it out, here: https://fanlore.org/wiki/Dethkomic_(comic) I'll be making edits to it as we go on, but Dethkomic readers are equally welcome to join Fanlore and edit the page. Go nuts, if that's your thing!

With all that out of the way, let's do a little deep-dive into making stories, shall we? Tally ho!

Where to begin?

I think a lot of tutorials out there take the "where to get ideas" thing to mean coming up with a subject matter, specifically. But if you're here reading a thing like Dethkomic and bothering to hang with me as I show you some behind-the-scenes stuff, there's a good chance you yourself are a fanfiction writer or are otherwise already acquainted with the whos and whats of your story. In other words, you're more or less looking to get to penning a plot. And even if you are still figuring out who your cast is going to be and what kind of world they're living in, I still think coming up with a storyline itself is a very solid place to lay a foundation. You can plug characters and junk in later. Trust me.

But how do you get ideas for a whole freaking story?

Some people like to look for ideas in their daily lives, pull from a lesson they've learned, or simply put their own spin on a story that they once read/watched/heard which stayed with them. To be inspired in this way, all it takes is an awareness of what turns you on.

If you're going to get good at writing, you're going to need to get good at critical analysis of the types of stories that really catch your attention.

It's an interesting self-exploration exercise to examine the components of what makes something conceptually interesting. If you can find what it is that has you intrigued by any given story trope or piece of media that you can't get enough of, then you're going to have a better time figuring out what things your own stories should include. They'll be the most fun for you to write and because you're having the most fun you possibly can while writing them -- your audience has a higher probability of enjoying them too.

That said, where you find this sexy idea is up to you. Some people like getting out and trying new things as much as getting into a favorite book, movie, tv show, or whatever... If you're an auditory person like me, maybe put on music and see where it takes your brain. In every instance, it helps to keep a journal or anything that'll allow you to jot down notes, when something comes into your radar as a good idea for a story.

And yeah... Just like the world-building thing, there's a good chance you already have a basic idea of what your plot is going to revolve around. But if you don't -- a notebook or some kind of way to remember what it is that good idea was, will be a huge help to you. At certain points in my process, it's going to be absolutely necessary, too. So get one now if you're going to have me as a tutor. *wink-wink*

And one very important aside: don't freak out if you come across something that seems wildly out there, too far-fetched, silly, or unbelievable. Take it from someone writing about a supernatural heavy metal band -- Ridiculous stuff can be awesome. In the same vein, so can something totally mundane and normal. It's all about what you want to write.

In the end, the number one goal of a good storyteller is...

You have to make the audience believe it!!1!

You can do this by playing it safe and keeping the characters and their setting pretty basic (or in the case of fanfiction, keep it close to established canon), or you can go nuts and write about cowboy alligators from outer space. Show the characters who are living it acting accordingly, and you're 90% good to go. The rest is understanding stuff like physics, history and other pieces of lore, which aren't as scary as they seem. And yes, there will be much more on this concept of getting your reader to believe your story throughout my tutorials, here. It's that important.

Character Progressions

A lot of writers take the opposite approach from the one mentioned above, and make a cast of characters first. They then write their stories around them. I do this too, and can definitely say that stories which are set up to introduce a character or characters are great springboards into working out a plot.

In all cases, your characters will have their own stories within your story. And I'm not necessarily talking about things like their history or whatever -- I'm talking about their progression through one single moment in time that is the story you will be writing. Lots of people will give you lots of advice about writing character arcs, but to keep it simple, I stick to this basic formula at the beginning of the writing phase, for each character:

A character's arc is what is going to happen to them versus what they want to happen to them.

That's it. You can answer a lot of questions about your character as you write them, by going back to that outline. Some people will tell you that you must always pick a conflict that is in direct opposition to some intrinsic component of a character, but that's not really how things have to go down in every story. More to the point, I think you'd find with any cast of more than one guy, you'd have so much in terms of conflicting challenges that the plot could easily take a back seat (more on this in a minute but you might have guessed, that's not a good thing). However, if you do find the major point of conflict in your story to align with a certain character's nature in particular -- don't be afraid to put that character front-and-center. Exploring them in such a way will feel like a natural fit and is loads of fun.

Now, again, throwing away the idea that every character conflict your cast comes up against is going to challenge them on a very personal level, we come to another basic but very huge very big thing that I figured out very late in my writing career but has been a game changer ever since:

Overall plot > Character plot

But what the hell does that mean? On the surface, it's saying you shouldn't sacrifice the story at large for any one (or all) of your characters' personal dilemmas.

What I found it really meant, however... was that in the interest of keeping my audience engaged and yes, the all-important keeping them believing, a story about Mary-Sue's camping trip to Arizona probably wasn't going to end up being the time to write about her upbringing in the jungles of Vietnam and how her dad fought in the Great Big War of 1988 on his home planet of P'Shoo and that time she rescued her cat named Begonia from rabid sea otters who escaped from prison.

...did you get that? Don't force a story within a story (force is the key word, there. You can absolutely have a story within a story but they've gotta tie together somehow). If you're reading what you've written and in your honest opinion, you seem to be forgetting about the camping trip the more it goes on, then maybe consider giving Mary her own story, later. Is this hard for you? Good, because that means you care about your characters and your writing. But also, it means you're going to have to work on chillaxing a bit when it comes to how much reveal you reveal. And that's cool, because we all do it. Hell, even professional script writers do it. Often.

The reality is, you gotta keep that plotline front and center, but it doesn't mean you can't have fun. Using the example of Mary-Sue's camping trip, we might be able to show that her dad taught her how to pack a camping bag like a pro, because he used to do it all the time during the war on his home planet. That kind of stuff is sooooo nice to throw in as a little interlude and works great to show your audience some sweet backstory. Want another quick and dirty trick for figuring out if you've got too much *extra* going on in a scene? Ask yourself:

Is it (relevant to the situation) character development or is it straight-up plot development?

If it's either of those, you're good to go. If it's not, then it's probably fluff. And fluff is fine -- just don't let it get overgrown. Get comfy with leaving some stuff on the cutting board. I promise there'll be time to show it, later.

Also, I use Mary-Sue lovingly. If I had a dollar for every time one of my characters was called a Mary-Sue, well... maybe I'd be building my own space ship to P'shoo instead of writing Dethklok fanfic right now, I dunno... Don't come at me..!

Plot Development

I'll formally get more into the ways that I break a story down into beats, next time. Some of you can probably guess what that's going to be about, but before I do, I thought it'd be incredibly important to go over a few "points of etiquette" when figuring out how your plot is going to lay out.

So you've got your Arizona camping trip story or whatever running in your head. You've now got to consider what your major conflicts are going to be, and how they're going to be resolved (and if they're going to be resolved). Here's my honest opinion on how to make that interesting so your audience stays engaged and has the highest probability of maintaining their belief in the story as a whole:

Raise the stakes like it's an ABBA song, baby.

Seriously, folks. A lot of the advice I give to writers has often come down to some variation of this. And it's because if I'm reading your story, I need to care about what's happening. Simple as that.

Now, does that mean you have to hold all your characters at gunpoint, make them the only hope to save humanity, and position a meteor somewhere in the sky that will ultimately collide with the planet and destroy us all if someone (namely, our heroes) can't do something about it?!

I mean... it works for me... but no. No, you don't have to do all that. Conflict can be as big or as little as you want, so long as it is important to the people involved. A peanut butter shortage is no big deal until you have a cast whose diet consists solely of peanut butter. You dig?

And for the love of God, if you're new to writing especially, don't feel like you have to have more than one conflict at any given time. Characters are easy. Interactions are easy. Conflict is an absolute bear. Because you have to resolve it, and if you want to be a good writer, you have to give it a resolution that's satisfying. Now would be a good time to mention that whole thing about making your audience believe extends to the point after the story has ended. Sure, a big chunk of any reader's takeaway is bound to be how cool their favorite character behaved throughout the story, but the thing that'll stick with them for years, even if they never liked any of your characters, is how the conflicts were resolved (we all have that fanfic in our heads -- you know the one -- that made you rethink whole seasons of the canon? Yeah... yeah, that's the one...).

How will the peanut butter shortage end? What will the characters do if it never does? How will the world (as they know it) change? There's lots of things to consider when writing out a conflict, and indeed, it can be scary. I understand why a lot of people shy away from epic problems! I absolutely do! It's devastating to build up a huge story until you finally get to the point where you have to have an ending... and you just can't think of one...

And that's why you guys have heard me say this one over and over and over again:

Conflict is made worlds easier if you figure out your ending, first.

Especially, ESPECIALLY if you do want to write multiple conflicts. Because they gotta all come together eventually, pals. And no, I don't mean you have to have it perfectly written out -- but the more you know about whether or not the major conflict will be managed and how you see your cast coming through it all, the better. You miss a huge opportunity to tie things into neat little bows if you have no idea where all your strings have run off to. Plus, think of all the missed opportunities to throw in some allusions to what happens at the end! Think about the theme! The metaphors!

Well... think about them, eventually... Let's talk about that for a minute and we'll move on to what's happening, next time:

Themes, Metaphor, and other Artsy Crap

You don't need to figure this out yet. Stop sweating it at the beginning of the writing process.

There we go.

The Next Steps

Next time we meet, I'll start to show you my actual process for turning an idea for a story into an actual comic. We'll get more nuanced about all the things we touched on, here, and rest assured -- it's okay if you haven't gotten everything figured out by this point. I sometimes think writing is akin to performative art -- the audience isn't privy to the performance, but they do get snapshots of the best parts at the end. Often, you just don't know where everything is going to end up until you get going. And for that reason, I want to end with this most invaluable piece of advice for any and all writers:

It's okay if you don't have every step along the way clearly mapped. It matters that you start walking.

Seeya next time, goofballs!

#dethkomic does writing #long post

[lenteur]

i appreciate you a lot, i hope you know that <3

i would like to use the hug card <3 i feel like i need a big biiig group hug, i just want to be squished <333

i hope they do, otherwise i feel like it may drive them apart or away from the company itself(which wouldn't be a bad thing, there are better companies).

your puns are spectacular, i only wish i had that same power ;) it's not that hard to just LOVE him, i mean he is the definition of precious <33 i feel like seungkwan is one of those idols that if you were to ever meet him, he'd be the same as what we see <3 a kind individual <3 though i have watched older fansignings and he seems so sweet <33 i'm having a lot of scoups feelings atm HELP...........

thank u !! we kinda went off criminal minds for the last week or so, my s/o is rewatching smallville and i've been rewatching riverdale <33

it's really, really good <3 i rewatched it this week, also started watching revenge of others, i'm on ep 2 and i am HOOKED <3 it's basically about a girl who transfers to her brother's school in an attempt to find his killer (who pushed him out of a window) >:( i feel like i know who the killer may be but i'm probably wrong :(

you are honestly so sweet <3 you are a ball of sunshine :)) i'm glad you're happy to continue talking with me <3 although if u were not, that would be absolutely okay <3 and you're welcome 🌼

they are both girls!!! <33 they are the cutest beans <3333

hello my dear bestie 💗 i have missed you soooooooooooooooooooooooo much but i'm glad you took some time for yourself and i hope you're feeling better than during the holidays 💕 and i also hope you know i appreciate you as well. very much so!

of course! come here 💓 we'll squeeze you with our love 😘

thank you so much for appreciating my puns 💘 very few people can enjoy them. only the big brained are able to. so therefore, i can share my secret with you :D i went to this amazing pun school ;) i can't mention their name or else they'll receive too many applications. the only thing i can tell you is that it was a lot of PUN (haha get it?)

omg! yes exactly. i knew you'd be able to translate what i'm trying to say about my boo (seungkwan) super well 💝 he's one of those rare idols where you can feel he's practically the same as what he shows in front of cameras. i can't confirm that because i don't know him personally but he kind of seems like he's not that different off camera. ah scoups scoups, that man is very dangerous indeed... i've watched back it up fancams during the caratblr event and i haven't felt this attacked in a long time. he has made a (s)coup(s) d'état to my heart 💞 (i'm proud of that pun)

smallville. a name i haven't heard in a long time. i remember watching it as a teenager, i recognise the faces of the actors but i have no clue as to what's going on in the show. the only thing i know is it's about superman (am i sure? not really) as for riverdale, the only thing i've watched are the yt video edits/the memes. some of the videos are kind of funny. especially when you know nothing about the show hahaha

oh wow congrats on actually keeping your promise of watching kdramas 👏👏👏 so revenge of others is a thriller mixed with a little bit of detective stories? (i don't remember the name of the genre lol) i hope the k*ll*r (just in case tumblr wants to flag this post) is not the person you're suspecting because then it ruins the story :/ at least in my opinion ^^ i mean, it's nice if you guess who it is while collecting clues during the first few episodes but if you already guessed by episode 2 then it's a bummer :( but again maybe the story is not entirely focused on finding the culprit and more about how the main character reacts and what will happen to the culprit? i'm sorry those are just random guesses >3< and i'm sure you've got the right answer. you're smart, very smart!

no need to worry about talking to me 💖 i very much enjoy talking to you and getting to know more about you (and your cats) 💟 you're honestly one of the highlights of my days/weeks when i see you pop up in my notifications so never worry about me not enjoying talking to you. it's the opposite actually!

my little beans are so cute 😻 every time i think about them, i get this huge smile on my face :D it's hard not to when they're this pretty and awesome 💗 a little kiss on both their foreheads because they deserve it for being so amazing 😘😘

#lettre #lovely mutuals #heather 🪶

[igarbagecannoteven]

good luck on writing your novel opening! i am sending you lots of positive writing and plot vibes!!! but also i would like to know the answers to 5, 11, 12, 24, 35, 43, 54, 72, and 77! That's a lot of questions so feel free to pick and choose but i am genuinely curious about all of them -hazel

thank you for the positive vibes and good luck wishes!! they have been received and i edited and reworked the first 4.5k of the assignment! (most of it had already been edited previously, so don't be too impressed lol)

5. how many wips do you have? how many fandoms/pairings are they for? depending on what you count as a "wip", i'd say somewhere btwn 30-40ish? all 5sos pairings have more than one wip, and i've got a couple hp wips (and one doctor who drabble, but that's finished so it doesn't count)

11. do you write scenes in order or do you jump around? i usually start from what i think is the beginning at the time and then start jumping around when i either run into a wall or am inspired by something that will happen later!

12. do you outline your fics? if yes, how detailed are your outlines? how far do you stray from them? it depends! most fics i start have a general idea of how they'll go, but they rarely get an outline (unless you count one sentence in a notes app as an outline, but i don't) as for proper outlines, i have three aus (my big superhero au, we gotta make a decision's parent au, and my crazy scifi au) that have "proper" outlines, which range from extremely vague to very specific. i have yet to stray too far from any of them, but i'm also not super far along so we'll see! (my 4th of july au and my baby blue au also have docs that are vaguely outline shaped, but i'm not counting them for multiple reasons, chief among them being that they may never be written)

24. how do you choose which pov to write from? answered here!

35. what's your favorite fic you've posted? ohhh gosh. i really do love what if i'm weak (and i need you tonight?) i think it's one of my strongest writing-wise, i love the characters, it's my 2nd most popular fic,,, yeah idk i just think it's nice :))

43. is there a trope or idea you'd really like to write but haven't yet? lots! there are so many that are in wip-land, but one that hasn't even gotten a doc yet is a longer fic that's both a quarantine au and a slowburn and a fic that centers around the character's ace-ness. i've been thinking about it for a while now and i think it's something i need to sit on for a few months/years before i start it, but hopefully someday it'll be written :))

54. what's the fandom/pairing distribution of your posted fics? it's very sad :(( i've got 3 malum, 2 lashton, 1 mashton, 1 cake, 1 malum friendship fic, and no muke or cashton :(((( i can't wait to release more stuff with other pairings i don't like how unbalanced it is :((

72. what's your favorite writing compliment you've gotten? today in my creative writing class i got a very nice compliment from a classmate that made me very soft(tm). he said something like "we've talked about how great your ideas and concepts are in your story and that's true, but the real strength is the characters, who are so real and strong that they help me believe everything about this world you're building". and i just. :') i mean any compliment on my writing makes me melt but i think characters are the most important part of a story and for him to say that??? i did not propose but it was a close thing ksdjflkdsjfljsd

77. why do you enjoy writing fanfic? i like the freedom it gives me! i like that i can write characters and not have to worry about telling people what they look like or their general vibe bc they already know! (i hate describing how characters look lol it's the bane of my existence) i like the community feeling! i love how people can just comment on what they liked best and know that i'll read it! i like that so many different kinds of writing can fit under this one umbrella! i just love it!!

writer’s ask time!

#these were all wonderful questions hazel i'm really glad you decided to make this ask game :))) #hazel #answering mail