#That boy is a literal saint what is wrong with you | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

a-dauntless-daffodil · 1 month

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Charlie: “-so we have TONS of angel-killing weapons now, thanks to Vaggie! Who had a lovely… Errrr. Fight?”

Vaggie: “It was pretty one sided. Call it a training match.”

Charlie: “She had a lovely training match with Carmilla Carmine! Who repeatedly kneed and kicked her in the face, which I’m not allowed to get upset about, because Vaggie isn’t upset about it!”

Sir Pentious: “Oh that sssounds… Pleasssant?”

Angel Dust: “Of course the one time Saint Sapphic isn’t pissed is when someone actually beats the crap outta her.”

Husk: “Wha’d I say? She’s got issues.”

Niffty: “Kneed in the face by Carmilla Carmine!?” (wistful sigh) “Lucky…”

Husk: “And you’ve got even worse issues, somehow.”

Vaggie: “Meanwhile, Charlie was off singing herself up a whole army in Cannibal Town.”

Charlie: “I wouldn’t call them a whole army-”

Vaggie: “They barely fit inside the hotel, babe.”

Charlie: “-and I wouldn’t really call it mine. Alastor and Rosie helped!”

Vaggie: “Did they give you the cannibal army?”

Charlie: “Nnnnoooo… I mean they did introduce me, but I had to do the convincing part myself.”

Vaggie: “Then it’s your army.”

Charlie: “Huh.”

Charlie: “…..hm.”

Vaggie: “Feels kinda nice, doesn’t it?”

Charlie: (giggling) “Maaaybe a little~”

Angel Dust: “If yous two LBs start kissin’ about the literal man eating army now under ya sway, I’m gonna be sick.”

Vaggie: “Aren’t you supposed to have zero gag reflex?”

Angel Dust: “That’s for sex stuff, Vaggitales. This is sappy and sincere.”

Husk: “A word that’s barely in your fucking vocabulary.”

Charlie: “Now Husk, you know that’s not true-”

Angel Dust: “Oh it’s true baby! But I’d be sucha a gooood little school boy if ya wanted to try teachin’ me, Purrrrfessor~”

Husk: “Can we feed him to the cannibals.”

Charlie: “No!”

Vaggie: “If they get sick before the big fight then we’re all dead.”

Angel Dust: “Hey!”

Sir Pentious: (SNIFFLING)

Charlie: “Oh oh Pen! Don’t be scared- no one’s feeding anyone to any cannibals!”

Vaggie: “Well. We’re not feeding anyone from the hotel to them…”

Charlie: “You hush, beautiful. Now there there Pentious, what wrong?”

Sir Pentious: “Nothing issss now! But EVERYTHING wasss, while you and missss Vaggie were fighting!”

Vaggie: “We weren’t-”

Charlie: “That was just me being-”

Vaggie & Charlie: “...”

Vaggie: “Sorry, you go-”

Charlie: “No no after you!”

Vaggie & Charlie: “..…..”

Hotel Crew: “….”

Vaggie: “Charlie had good reasons for being angry-”

Charlie: “I wasn’t angry! Or, not the way I THOUGHT I was? It’s complicated-”

Vaggie: “Valid. Reasonable. Way more forgiving than called for.”

Charlie: “If I’d just TALKED with you like you’d WANTED-”

Vaggie: “You didn’t want to. That’s fair.”

Charlie: “I guess, but. It wasn’t fun.”

Sir Pentious: “No it wasss not!” (crying) “It sssseemed as though you were ssssplitting up! L-leaving ussss! It wasss! DREADFUL!!”

Charlie: “Ohhhhh nooooo we would never-!”

Vaggie: “The hotel thing is kinda bigger than one relationship, Pentious. We’re not giving up on you guys.”

Charlie: “-and that’s also why we’d never break up.”

Vaggie: “Never’s a long time sweetie… and three years was a long time too.”

Charlie: “Not with you it wasn’t. And forever won’t be either.”

Vaggie: “…”

Angel Dust: “If you cry, I really will throw up.”

Vaggie: “Shut up.”

Charlie: (hugs vaggie) “See, Pen? You don’t have to worry about us, okay?”

Sir Pentious: “Okay. Y-essss.”

Charlie: “Shh sshh, please don’t cry…”

Sir Pentious: (wailing) “I can’t help it!!!”

Vaggie: “Hey, how come HIS tears aren’t vomit worthy but MINE are??”

Angel Dust: “Cuz he’s a sad snake boy in a top hat that cuddles with eggs, and you’re supposed to be tough as nails and impossible to fucking break, Vagina. Seein’ ya as being anything other than gay or pissed? Stomach turning. Yuck”

Husk: “You’ve got issues too, dumbass.”

Angel Dust: “I know.” (preens) “But they look GOOD on me~”

Sir Pentious: (snuffles) “It’sss jussst so good, sssssseeing you two the way you sssshould be! Ugh.” (dripping) “May I borrow a, a tisssssue, Niffty?”

Niffty: “SURE-”

Husk: “You don’t fucking want that or to know where the fuck it’s been. Here. Napkin.”

Sir Pentious: “Thankssss!”

Sir Pentious: (LOUD NOSE BLOWING HONK)

Charlie: “Better?”

Sir Pentious: “Much, yessss. But how did you manage it?”

Charlie: “Manage what?”

Sir Pentious: “Fixssssing thingsss between you! After it wasss so bad!”

Husk: “Without any alcohol, even.”

Sir Pentious: "Or exssssplossions!"

Angel Dust: “Yeah toots, three years of not sayin’ she was an angel is a pretty big shit pile to have dropped on ya, even in hell.”

Niffty: “YEAH VAGGIE! HOW MANY SOULS HAVE YOU KILLED?!”

Vaggie: “Thousands.”

Husk: “FUCK.”

Niffty: “OoooOOoohhhhh~”

Angel Dust: “Now that’s a body count. Like, not a good one but. Wow.”

Sir Pentious: “Sssee? And now Charlie isss hugging you! How iss that possssible?”

Vaggie: “… I don’t… I, gave her space….”

Charlie: “She’s Vaggie. I already knew who she was.”

Husk: “Exorcist.”

Angel Dust: “Liar?”

Niffty: “Mass MURDERER heheheh…”

Charlie: “My partner.”

Sir Pentious: “I don’t underssstand! Did ssshe sssay ssssorry?”

Vaggie: “Sorry really wouldn’t cut it.”

Charlie: (laughing) “She helped me start the hotel- and run it- and get my dad’s help talking to heaven, and- more things than I can count, honestly! Doesn’t that say enough?”

Sir Pentious: “Oh… ssso wordsss are not… what mattersss?”

Charlie: “They can matter, but it’s what we DO that makes them mean anything.”

Sir Pentious: "...what we... do?"

Angel Dust: “Like how heaven and it’s angels say it’s all full of great people up there but then they go an' leave us all to rot and die, yeah?”

Charlie: “Vaggie didn’t."

Angel Dust: "Score! Hell's got ONE angry lesbian on it's side!"

Charlie: "And I won’t either.”

Hotel Crew: “…”

Husk: “Are we done. I need a drink.”

Vaggie: “Y-eah.” (hoarse) (clears throat) “That’s where we’re at now. Any questions?”

Angel Dust: (raises hands) “Husk has one!”

Husk: “Fuck you no I don’t-”

Angel Dust: “Sure ya do babypaws. What the FUCK-”

Angel Dust: (points at Vaggie’s wings)

Angel Dust: “-are THOOOOOOSE???”

Vaggie: “…Those are my wings. Asshole.”

Angel Dust: “Bitch~”

Husk: “Motherfucking dumbasses.”

Charlie: “Angel please, it’s rude to point like that! And to um. Say the other part also- but that’s okay I know you mean it in a nice way!”

Angel Dust: “An’ what about Saint Vagatha huh? She called me shit too! Was that her bein’ nice?”

Charlie: “She-”

Vaggie: “I’m nicely not stabbing you.”

Charlie: ��-she’s trying her best.”

Angel Dust: “By not stabbing me?”

Husk: “Now that’s impressive as hell.”

Vaggie: “Thanks.”

Angel Dust: “Hmph. Lucky a guy can take pride in people wantin' to stick stuff in him...”

Sir Pentious: “Vaggie? Pleasse pardon the quesstion, however I ssssseem to recall you sssaying you didn’t HAVE any, ah, wingssss?”

Niffty: “Or tits!”

Vaggie: “They grew back.”

Niffty: “Did your t-”

Vaggie: “Niffty-” (groans) “Look, there’s a cockroach over there. Go hunt, kill- whatever.”

Niffty: "KILL KILL KILL-!"

Charlie: “Aren’t her wings AMAZING! LOOK AT THEM!!! You guys have no idea how soft-! wait they what? Grew back?”

Angel Dust: (grinning) “What about your-”

Vaggie: “Ask about my tits twice in one day and die.”

Charlie: “They were gone? You weren’t just hiding them- Twice?”

Niffty: (on vaggie’s shoulder) (checking down her shirt) “Nope! Tits still missing. Nice pecs though!”

Vaggie: “………”

Angel Dust: “She said it, not me!!”

Vaggie: (SIGH) “These are the people I’m about to risk my life for.”

Charlie: “I feel like I’ve missed something important..?”

Husk: “No you fucking haven’t.”

Angel Dust: “So oh heavenly cunt, what the fuck did ya do with Carmine to get the feather dusters reinstated?”

Vaggie: “No idea. Uh- Thought gay thoughts about Charlie? I guess?”

Charlie: “Awww~!”

Sir Pentious: “Aww!!”

Vaggie: “And mostly non-violent thoughts about the rest of you.”

Niffty: “Booo…”

Vaggie: “Anyway, since Lute didn’t use heavenly steel while tearing them off my back, I guess they just needed time to heal up or whatever.”

Charlie: “I’m SO gonna send a thank-you note to Carmilla for helping you with… tha….”

Charlie: “….tEARING? She, Lute-”

Vaggie: “Not now. Tell you later, babe.”

Charlie: “BUt- I’ve met her TWICE and you didn’t say-!”

Vaggie: “Let’s focus on finishing debriefing the troo- the friends for now. ‘kay?”

Charlie: “I…”

Angel Dust: “I TOLD YA IDIOTS IT MIGHT BE A SENSITIVE FUCKING TOPIC!”

Husk: “Then why the fuck did you bring it up!?”

Angel Dust: “My mouth likes to be open and stupid shit comes out of it sometimes- I dunno!”

Vaggie: “Yeah well I’m so not about to start spilling the gory details in the hotel lobby. The cannibals are already starting to look hungry. If we’re up to date on the mission statement and current crew resource management situation, then-”

Niffty: “Hey Vaggie, Vaggieee.”

Vaggie: “What.”

Niffty: (giggles) “Did Lute steal your tits too?”

Vaggie: “….”

Angel Dust: “…what? Don’t glare at ME about ya blindly obvious shortfall in that depar-Tit-ment-”

Husk: “Shut up before she fucking tests some of her new shiny weapons on you.”

Vaggie: “Don’t give me ideas.”

Charlie: “Why is everyone talking about my girlfriend’s breasts. She got her wings ripped off and suddenly has them back, and we’re all just, talking about bra size???”

Angel Dust: “Toots, if she wears bras, it’s gotta be just so’s she looks good for you.”

Vaggie: “I’ll take that compliment.”

Angel Dust: “I wasn’t sayin’ it as one-”

Vaggie: “Change your mind or lose your hair.”

Angel Dust: “-you’re a very loving lesbian and ya make Sappho the OG herself proud.”

Vaggie: “Better.”

Sir Pentious: “E-excusssse me!? Thisss, sssssadistic Lute person iss, ssssssomeone we will be fighting against..?”

Vaggie: “Yeah but I’ll handle her, don’t worry.”

Charlie: “wHAT!?”

Vaggie: “I said, I’m the one who knows how she fights anyway, so I’ll-”

Charlie: “YOU. WILL. NOT-”

Demon Charlie: “-NIFFTY DON’T YOU DARE STUFF THAT DEAD COCKROACH DOWN MY GIRLFRIEND’S SHIRT!!!”

Vaggie: “AUGH?!”

Niffty: “Aww.”

Angel Dust: “Oh that’s nasty.”

Husk: "Hreaugh." (hairball noise) “Whatever’s wrong with you, Niffty, never EVER fucking tell me what it is.”

Niffty: (waving cockroach) “It’s just for padding~ You know what they say! Every little bit helps! Right?”

Charlie & Vaggie: “NO!”

Niffty: (CACKLING)

Sir Pentious: “…..thisss isss, sssssso beautiful….”

Husk: “The fucking cockroach?”

Sir Pentious: “No. Them.” (wipes tear) “They’re ssstill, hugging.”

Angel Dust: “Yeah... It’s almost sweet enough to make a guy puke.”

Husk: “Almost?”

Angel Dust: “Well I’m not gonna ruin the mood for them by actually puking!”

Husk: (smiles) “Uh-huh.”

Angel Dust: “Plus, think of my boots! What if they got splashed on and shit?”

Husk: “Right.”

Angel Dust: “And Niffty’s doin’ good work breakin’ the tension and grossin’ them out anyway…”

Husk: “Mm-hmm.”

Angel Dust: “….And. It’s nice to see ‘em bein’ cute again.”

Husk: “…..”

Angel Dust: “….because it was weird when they weren’t and maybe, MAYBE, I was worried.”

Husk: “There we fucking go. Good boy.”

Angel Dust: “!!!”

Sir Pentious: “Oh that sseems to have cheered him up immenssely..”

Husk: "Fuck."

Angel Dust: “Oooh~ Nauseous to horny in less than a second? Damn, Purrrfessor. That’s a new record even for me~”

Husk: “Fuck no.” (fleeing)

Husk: “Alright, I’m opening the fucking bar! Come get your complimentary we might all be dying together soon drinks- and nobody fucking DARE ask me to use body parts in them. This isn’t fucking Cannibal Town. My drinks are good enough without fingers or eyeballs floating in them or whatever.”

Cannibal crowd: (grumbles but politely ques up for drinks)

Charlie: “I think maybe we’ll pass? Vaggie? Our room, us, alone, maybe?”

Vaggie: “Are we gonna talk about stuff?”

Charlie: “I would VERY MUCH like to talk about all things now yes please.”

Vaggie: “Then I’m gonna need a drink. Husk-”

Husk: “Take the fucking bottle.”

Angel Dust: “Here, and this bottle too!”

Charlie: “Oh thank you Angel D- is this LUBE!? Already OPENED lube!??!?”

Angel Dust: “Happy make-up sex~”

Charlie: “I- Vaggie no, not the spear- thanks, Angel Dust, but I think- Vaggie I said not the spear- I think we can do without borrowing your, uh, personal bottle of- okay that’s it, up over the shoulder you go. Hup!”

Vaggie: “I’m gonna kill him! I’m gonna save him from the extermination by killing him RIGHT NOW!”

Charlie: “-and you told me to ignore you when you talk like that. Anyway, everyone else have good night with the drinks and cannibals!”

Angel Dust: "Will do, toots! You gays enjoy eatin' each other out!"

Vaggie: “Babe please just let me strangle him a little bit-”

Charlie: “Nope! We’re gonna go explore some past trauma!”

Angel Dust: “An’ each other’s bodies!!!”

Charlie: (carrying vaggie upstairs) “Not helping!”

Vaggie: (still struggling) “I don't NEED to talk about my trauma- i need to get my hands on that asshole twink!"

Angel Dust: "GET IN LINE BEHIND HALF OF HELL, VAG-GAY!"

Charlie: "Hold my hand instead?"

Vaggie: "...."

Vaggie: (melting) (holds hand) "...fiiiiine."

#hazbin hotel #chaggie #charlie morn #vaggie #angel dust hazbin hotel #husk hazbin hotel #niffty hazbin hotel #sir pentious #incorrect quotes #“what happened after they got back to the hotel in ep 7-” Chaos.#i'd imagine it was chaos and cannibals and dead cockroachs #EVERYWHRE #XD #niffty nooooo

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dimepdf · 2 years

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𝐈𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐉𝐎𝐇𝐍𝐍𝐘𝐒 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋. + 𝐒𝐈𝐌𝐎𝐍 '𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐓' 𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐘

masterlist. / taglist. / any request?

synopsis. since the moment that Ghost laid eyes on you, he has sworn to be smitten. too bad you are Soap's girl.

pairing. simon “ghost” riley x reader , johnny “soap” mactavish x reader

genre and warnings. +18 nsfw under the cut. minors dni, pwp, porn with plot, smut, hard pinning, semi public sex, sub!ghost, power kink, degradation kink, mommy issues, voice kink, humiliation, i know nothing about COD just here for my masked meow meow | — feedback is always welcomed & don't forget to reblog 🤍

Simon was no saint: sure, he credited himself for being a morally "sometimes" correct person with pretty decent values.

That alone should have been enough to build a platform on top of the truly irrational thoughts that would swirl in his thick skull and had only gotten worse since the day he joined the forces.

He had blamed his rough upbringing for a lot of things since the day he was born, but being as touched deprived as he was now was definitely one of the things he could check at the top of his list as the cause of his crippling mommy issues, and boy was your appearance only adding fuel to the fire.

Being deployed was something he had just gotten used to, the feeling of never really settling down and always being on guard, and being used to having eyes at the back of his head.

But there was one thing Simon could never quite figure out, something that seemed to come naturally to his charming pal Johnny, and that was women.

When Soap had first hinted to Ghost about him being in a two-year relationship so suddenly out of the blue a few months before you even managed to show your face. It was like playing a perplexing game of Where's Waldo to piece together the mystery woman about whom his partner was making risque jokes in their conversations.

At first, Simon just wanted to throw in the towel and was entirely convinced that you were just a figment of the soldier's imagination, not that he would blame him.

Simon understood that the battlefield is a pretty lonely place and wouldn't judge his friend for losing a couple of marbles along the way, but if Johnny was losing some of his rockers, he wouldn’t prefer the delusion to continue on for too long.

Before he could step in and pull the plug, your official appearance had almost knocked the wind from his chest like a brick straight to the heart.

Throughout the period that you were just a pieced-together image from the shitty descriptive words Johnny had used to describe you, Simon almost stumbled the moment he had laid eyes on you.

Perhaps it was because he hadn't had the opportunity to fully look at a woman in the way he was able to look at you, but words couldn't describe how your features had him struggling to tear his gaze away.

Luckily, his broadening and usually quiet demeanor were enough to cover up his pure awkwardness during your first introduction.

Struggling to form a normal question or even his name, Johnny introduces him with a dismissive pat on the shoulder before moving on and rounding up the rest of the team.

Since this, your appearance has been like a plague to him, like an infection burning under his skin, blurring the line between what is wrong and what is right.

If anything, you seemed to want to spread the infection even further from the way you would always try to joke with him, how you were always the only one to get handsy with him when talking, how you would always stand up for him when Soap would do his usual teasing, how your voice would always turn soft when you spoke to him, and despite all of that, you had still been in a loving relationship with Johnny, and yet Simon just couldn't shake you from his head.

You had him so smitten, like a stray puppy just looking for some sort of attention, and your mere existence was the bone of his dreams (literally and figuratively).

You had him staying up late at night with his makeshift mattress and a bundle of blankets to form the most comfortable cot he could build out in the middle of some country he had forgotten the name of.

Night had fallen, and the team decided it would be best to set up camp not far from the target's resting place in a nearby cleared-out lot.

Most people would have been thrilled to get a few extra hours of sleep to unwind after all the violence, but for Simon, those quiet moments were the fucking worst, and his erection, straining against his pants, begging for any ounce of attention as it pulsed against his briefs, only proved his point later on.

As everyone parted ways, not too far but not too close, Simon thought that he had spread out just enough away from everyone, alone in an empty room, to spread out and attempt to find his comfort against the rough hardwood flooring, but the moment he had heard the shuffle next door, his body was as still as a board.

Apparently, Simon wasn’t the only one looking for some alone time for the night.

The noises coming from the other side of the room that you and Johnny had occupied left Simon feeling like he was standing right there next to you as you two went at it.

He could only guess that you were pressed against the wall and being lifted into some sort of position that had you whimpering out Johnny's name and moaning out how big he felt inside of you and whimpering about how good he felt.

Simon would remember how he sat against the wall, listening to every moan and plea of pleasure that came from your mouth.

Simon knew that he was in dangerous territory the moment his fingers crept past the waistband of his pants and dipped into his underwear to relieve the growing problem tenting in his pants.

It was wrong to imagine fucking your best friend's fucking hot girlfriend, but in his defense, you just sounded so sweet, begging for dick.

Simon was just convinced it was like you wanted him to hear those sweet little whines.

His hips bucked in at the brush of his cold fingers wrapping around his hilt.

The sensation, paired with the sound of your hiccuping moans, sent a jolt of pleasure through his senses.

All he could hear was you as his hand fell in the humiliating action of jerking himself off.

His breath caught in his throat as his head slouched against the wall with a small thump, his heart skipping a beat at the noise but quickly ignored it as your sounds didn't seem to stop, reminding him that you were probably too busy getting your brains fucked out to listen to every little sound.

If anything, just the sheer realization sparked Simon to want to be louder—the thought of wanting to push that bar as far as he possibly could to the point where you would catch him in the act of pleasuring himself from the sound of your voice alone.

The thought of you punishing him for doing something so wrong—for touching himself without your permission—is terrifyingly arousing.

At the image, he let out a gasp, his mouth open, his eyes squeezed shut, and his hand quickened as he fisted his hands tighter at the scenarios of you controlling him, leaving him strung onto every command.

As your pleas became less and less audible, the bliss grew stronger and stronger.

Simon wanted to get familiar with the sound, with the noise of your orgasm creeping just around the corner.

As he could only make do with his hand, he imagined the feeling of being inside of you, the warmth of your walls, and as he brought himself closer to his own edge, the thick ribbons of cum shot from him with a grunt that followed just after yours.

The post-nut clarity left him catching his breath, yanking his mess-covered hand out of the front of his pants, and staring at everything that had unfolded with a hard, annoyed grunt.

God how he wished that he could have you.

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starzshopoflove · 1 month

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Filthy Girl ( John Price x Reader)

Notes: fem reader! sfw mostly ,literally just me projecting onto reader, reader is kind of a pervert drabble! This will be multi part!! (WC:474)

You whore.

Okay maybe not a whore lets relax on that. You’re not a saint but who could blame you.

Yeah maybe fucking your middle aged neighbour wasnt on your bucket list but if anyone saw him the way you did they’d do the same. It could be argued that you planned this but in your defense he might’ve too.

Can you help it? The way he hauled in those boxes to his shared home immediately drew your attention.

Henley's shirt stretched over his broad chest practically clinging to his shoulders and hugging those biceps, if you look at them long enough you could feel your mouth start to water. God what you’d give to have one of those arms wrapped around your neck, your mouth just latched onto his hardened forearms, tongue lapping an biting at the muscled between your teeth tasting both your sweat on him-

Fuck whats wrong with you? Objectifying your poor neighbor the second you see him?

Absolutely carry on.

Which is exactly what you did because here you are holding a box of freshly made cookies in a pair of controversially tight flared yoga pants and top. None of this is neighborly behavior.

You suck up your nerves ringing the door bell ignoring the way your hearts beating in your chest because fuck, its not like your actually doing anything wrong right? You just wanna meet the new neighbors, you even baked them cookies like a good little neighbor, and of course you've dressed appropriately it would be rude to greet them for the first time in some sloppy joggers and a hood no?

By the time he opens the door your just standing there like a fool too far in your head when you actually register his voice

“Can I help you?”

Fuck, thats gonna sound good all low and soft in your ear when you let him take you from the back.

He thinks its sweet that his little neighbor baked him and his boys some cookies for their tea and that its sweeter how she thinks he doesn't notice her practically undressing him with her eyes.

Not to say he isn't doing the same.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

You’re so gross

Its been less than 24 hours and you’ve already wanked to him. Here you are back in bed staring at your ceiling practically heaving in the aftershock, sweaty, dry mouth and thighs soaked. He doesn't even know hes given you enough wank material for the next week from that 7 minute interaction.

It wasn't hard to lay back and think about how that beard would feel scratching the soft skin of your thighs, how that rough voice would grow soft for you for hushed whispers of praise, how he could hold you still under his weight to make sure hes taking you as deep as possible.

Fucking pervert.

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imtrashraccoon · 1 month

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Headcanons!

Nightmare & his gang's reactions to being (affectionately) called a "bad boy".

I decided to do this rather than actually write something. @owl-bones ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Axe

"uh... that's not a good thing, right?"

Poor guy is confused. He's already hyper aware of how much he's changed from the harmless comedian to a hulking monstrosity and he's constantly questioning why anyone would want to be friends with, let alone date, him. He still thinks it's a bit of a weird thing to call him once you explain, although he's flattered that you like how tough he looks. He doesn't really get it though? He's just being himself.

Killer

"you know it, cutie~"

Congrats! You just boosted his already very high ego. He already likes to wear stereotypical bad boy clothes so he's all too pleased to wear his new title as well. He's gonna be extra obnoxious about it for a little while but if you're this close with him already, you must have the patience of a saint. Don't be too surprised if he steals a motorcycle from some poor guy and tries to convince you to go for a ride. He doesn't have a license though...nor has he ever actually driven one.

Dust

"...? i thought that was obvious..."

He's a little confused but he's got the spirit. While he doesn't care as much about his appearance as Killer, Dust still has some fashion sense. He likes caps and has at least half a dozen already. Since he's the brooding type, nothing will really change but he's secretly pleased that you like his style. He might start showing off a bit, just to see your reaction, but ultimately will still want cuddles at the end of the day.

Nightmare

He gives you an odd look before patting your head in a slightly patronizing way. "I'm a villian, dear~"

He is actually rather amused by your comment but believes it isn't very accurate. He does his fair bit of brooding but that's about where the comparisons end since he has a variety of hobbies that tend to clash with the stereotype. He also dresses rather fancy and wouldn't even consider wearing anything like that. Probably... He might humour you if you're really close with him, but you'll owe him big time.

Baggs

He laughs. "oh, darling! if you only knew everything i've done, we wouldn't even be having this conversation. ...what?"

He'll insist he knew exactly what you meant and then question what you thought he meant. Good luck getting him to elaborate on whatever his statement implied though. You're a special person and he'd really rather not risk your opinion of him changing if you did find out. He's quite good at distracting you too, even without using his powers to modify your memory...

Bonus!

Cross

"huh? ...uh, thanks?"

It took him a second to realize you were actually trying to compliment him and now he's rather flustered at the thought. Isn't he a bit too uptight for that? He's a soldier, not some punk. But, the idea that you see this other side to him is kind of nice. Be prepared for questions about it and he might try to show off for you too. Despite not being sure of himself, he somehow succeeds and looks effortlessly cool at the same time.

Error

"N-no?? I'm literally j-just being myself??"

He is very, very confused. What even is a "bad boy"? He's not even doing anything wrong and is just purging the useless worlds like he's always done. You beg to differ, which actually starts to frustrate him. His clothes are comfy and he made them himself, there's no way he'll change, even if you beg him. You might have a sulky sack of bones on your hands for a while. Good thing he's easily bribed with chocolate and binge watching the latest installments of his favourite show universe.

#raccoons headcanons #disclaimer i know very little about this topic myself #i had to write this though #i have a type after all #horror sans #killer sans #dust sans #nightmare sans #baggs sans #cross sans #error sans

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calcja · 10 months

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SAINT OR SLUT

DISCLAIMER: THIS IS A 18+ POST W SOME NSFW THEMES READ AT YOUR OWN RISK ⚠️

Sypnosis: Here's what i think abt whether bonten characters r virgins or nahhh (ofc they're not minors here)

author's note: EXPECT wrong grammars and spellings bc english is not my first languange but i will try my best 😤 and also

❗️pictures are not mine. Credits to the rightful owners❗️

❗️ this doesnt follow the manga ❗️

• MANJIRO SANO

• Personally, i'm 50/50 whether if Mikey is a virgin or not, but i'm sure home boi flirts w girls

• Bro is literally stressed out w his life ever since he was a kid and we are all aware that he lost lots of people during his teenage years that led him into becoming a person that he is right now

• He would go to clubs for work or when he's stressed out, looking for some hot chicks to comfort his lonely ass then make out with them later on but it actually depends though if he would be in the mood to do it with someone, he might be "too tired" to have sex or if ever he did it, he would most likely do it just to feel something

• HARUCHIYO SANZU

• Now come on now

•He's a slut. like a literal slut. the slut of them all. the one and only babygirl.

• He's the guy that when you first look at him, you will say ti yourself immediately that "oh he's a slut" "oh that guy is definitely not a virgin" "he definitely fuck bunch of girls"

• Especially when he's high? oh my god. One thing u expect when this guy is high is hes at the club fucking some girls or getting his dick sucked.

• He doest want makeouts w gropings, home boi always wants a good fuck

•But regardless of being a fuck boy, Sanzu doesnt just easily goes to clubs on his daily basis, when he has work to do especially when it an order from mikey, he would do that first.

• Overall, he's the type of guy who do his works first and surprisingly do it well before he gets his ballsack empty!

• KAKUCHO

• hmmmm this guy is a.... virgin.

• He's voted for being the best boyfriend at the poll one time so i guess this guy is actually sweet irl or in fanfics (EVERYBODY LOVES THIS GUY HE SOLOS ALL UR FAVES IF UR A HATER OF THIS MAN THEN J ALSO HATE U)

•Moving on, Kakucho goes to clubs only just for work and nothing more. Sure he might get some drinks then that's it. • Unfortunately, it's very rare for someone to come up to him to flirt, not bcs of his scary face but bcs of his calm yet cold personality, voice and aura.

• I think he prefers to train more than having sex when he's stressed

• I just imagine him during his day off in his apartment or house or wherever the fuck he lives to have a calm life, taking care of some plants, relaxing while watching tv, reading books, drinking coffee, training and overall just enjoying little things in life.

• ANYWAYS BUT WHY DO I THINK ABT HIM PLAYING A GUITAR (Izana's old guitar)?!?!???! AND HE LEARNED PLAYING THE GUITAR FOR IZANA???

#bonten #manjiro sano #kakucho #tokyo revengers #sanzu haruchiyo #sano manjiro #tokyo rev x reader #tokyo rev smut #bonten imagines #bonten mikey #bonten smut

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b0nten · 1 year

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POLAROIDS & CIGARETTES

[SYNOPSIS] ˚⁀➷｡ them finding out you have a polaroid of you in your phone case

[NOTES] ˚⁀➷｡ ran sanzu and hakkai being goofy

hakkai

bro is SO excited

literally the happiest man alive

he just wanted to see what the time was and next thing he knew he was hit by a sudden rush of euphoria, happiness and everything positive

my guy looked at you like you had just commited the BIGGEST, MOST SINFUL crime ever

“what’s wrong, hakkai?”

“are you REALLY asking that 🤨?”

“….”

“UR PHONE CASE IS SO CUTE☺️☺️!!!”

and then he kisses you

literally so wholesome

would URGE you to take another pic for him to keep in his phone case.

boy adores showing you off

speaking about showing you off,,

i think his photo would be REAAAAAALLY similar to yours or maybe even a re-enacted version of yours

matchy king

the photo is of you two on your anniversary, at tokyo disneyland. it’s so pretty — the sky is dark and there’s fireworks dancing on it, and the castle’s towering behind you. you and hakkai are wearing matching mickey and minnie mouse ears and you’re holding a giant koala plushie that the won for you at an arcade. it’s the most beautiful picture ever, especially because you’re both laughing and oozing out that same happy energy through the photo!

ran

ALSO SO EXCITED

HE’S SOOOOO SMUG ABOUT IT TOO

like “what’s that you got there. y/n😏?”

“oh, this?” you lift your phone and show him the back “it’s a polaroid we took when we went to West Walk”

unlike hakkai, he doesn’t keep a polaroid in his phone case, only because he tried to but somehow lost it :(

he likes to show it off SO MUCH THO

like, when he’s with friends every 10 minutes he’s like “btw did you see this cute pic of me and my queen?”

LOVE THAT FOR HIM

get urself a man like ran

the photo is one of you in a bigass fitting room in saint laurent, looking SO extra.

bonus: you actually have two polaroids, the second being one of you two fooling around in a department store.

the picture is of you two, and you’re sitting in a cart, while he’s the one pushing it.

also, both of them are SURELY mirror pics. i will not argue or elaborate.

another bonus:

years later, when he works for bonten, he comes up randomly to you and tells you to get dressed. then, he takes you to West Walk into YSL and you guys take photos like the two cuties that you are. then, he tells you to put it in your phone case. before you leave, you have him unknowingly recreate the department store photo that he STILL doesn’t know of.

sanzu

first things first

let me start by describing the polaroid

your polaroid consists of a drunk, blurry selfie you took with your boyfriend when the two of you had one too many drinks.

he’s leaning against a brick wall on the street, struggling to light a cigarette. he’s got one leg propped up, the other fully out in the street, and his white hair is messy. he looks so grumpy too 🥹🥹

then, in the opposite corner, there’s you! your face is so zoomed in and blurry but your contagious smile ia still noticeable, through the crinkle of your eyes and very very stretched skin around the mouth from how hard you’re smiling (since the mouth can’t even be seen)

i think it’s cute

actually really cute

he’s not really of the same opinion as i

but that’s ok! we don’t care!

“ Y/NNNNN WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCKKKK”

^ his first reaction

then he actually started panicking

“what if your parents see this?”

“my parents live an ocean and plenty of kilometers away”

“YEAH BUT STILL”

you try to reassure him that the picture is very nice and you’ve actually gotten a lot of compliments on it

“PEOPLE REALLY SAW IT????” now he wants to crawl into a hole and die

almost goes into septic shock when mucho sees the picture and points out that it represents your guys’ dynamic pretty darn good (doesn’t say anything bad or laughs maliciously, genuinely think it’s cute)

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teddy-bear-queen · 11 months

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Bro I have to say this I swear-

I see people trying everything to make it seem like Wukong is a lot worse then he is. I understand you like Macaque, I do too! But the entire point of their relationship is that they’re both in the wrong. The difference is, Wukong got, well, character development. It just feels super annoying to discredit Wukongs hard work in JTTW because of things he did prior.

I’m not saying Wukong is some saint, or an amazing person even while the story is taking place, but he is NOT as bad as some of the people in the LMK fandom make him out to be. I assume it’s because Macaque is the goth shy boy (/hj? /lh), but Macaque literally comes out just to manipulate MK and steal his powers. He’s making the exact same mistakes Wukong did, fighting for power so that he can protect himself. Get stronger. Etc.

Season 4 Special Spoilers:

I don’t think Wukong was ignorant in saying that Macaque doesn’t come to help him. I mean, he got beaten by the Jade Emperor and presumably everyone just left him there and ran off. I’d be pretty mad too. Of course, Macaque was hesitant to begin with, and that’s fair. But he was already there, he could’ve tried. But Macaque has a habit of shying away from fights, only really fighting others to settle a score (S1 E9) or if he has to (LBD arc - both working for and against her, but the S1 E9 relates here, too.) I’m not saying this as an insult, more of an observation. He’s not a coward by any means, a coward would be Peng, who leaves mid-battle in fear of being hurt or losing. Macaque finishes his fights (still knowing when it’s reasonable to retreat), but more often then not prefers to prevent them in the first place. (WHICH IS WHY THE DIVORCE SCENE HITS SO HARD, you know he’s been bottling that up ;v;)

ANYWAY back on topic. I definitely think everything Wukong said there was true. I don’t think he was trying to lie or manipulate Macaque by saying “everything I did was for us”. This is further confirmed when we see him later, tired and completely defeated.

He has nothing to hide here. He’s at his lowest point, stuck in a mountain, tensions high from being abandoned by his sworn brothers, being abandoned by people he held dear. Macaque was trying to be nice, but if I were stuck in a mountain and offered food from someone who left me in such a vulnerable state? I probably wouldn’t take the it either. ALSO. We still have NOT seen these things from Wukongs perspective! Every single time something is revealed from his past, it’s narrated by Tang, Azure, Macaque, etc. Wukong has never (from my memory) spoken about his trials first-hand. This is why I love the guy so much!! What’s going on in his head? How does he feel about these things?

These are such complex characters who have been through so much, so it really bothers me when people look at Sun Wukong and decide to demonise him because of the past which, not only has he moved on from, but we have never even seen his side of the story on. Why did he kill Macaque? Did he kill Macaque? (I’ve seen theories he didn’t, we don’t know rn tho)

Wukong went through a lot of pain to change. Wukong is haunted by his past and in genuine distress over it. You can’t tell me this isn’t a man filled with deep remorse for his actions.

He’s not perfect, but he’s a hell of a lot better. It just really frustrates me that people disregard and discredit the work he put in to get to this point.

THATS IT THATS THE POST

This is really disorganised I’m sorry, I just keep seeing people act like Wukong is the scum of the earth and I honestly just do not get it.

Please don’t send asks about this post, just reblog or comment.

I don’t want to deal with passive aggressive (or just straight up aggressive) people.

As a final note: No, Wukong is not perfect. He’s still a deeply flawed character even with his development. No, Macaque isn’t the scum of the earth. They both have their own problems and they both fucked up. They both did something wrong. That’s the point.

#suki speaks #lmk #Lego monkie kid #sun wukong #lmk sun wukong #lmk wukong #wukong #lmk macaque #six eared macaque #analysis #?#more of a ramble #or a rant #it’s 11:30pm

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sickvictorianangel · 3 months

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I don't wanna tag anyone or fight anyone on the internet. But no, seeing Dutch as who he is isn't being ableist. For the love of God, people! Chill 🤣

Dutch has a history of manipulating every women he dated, starting with Grimshaw herself. After Anabelle died, and he used that as an excuse to go after Colm, he hopped on bed with Molly, a woman he completely destroyed and left to die in a brutal way (same with Susan). Dutch manipulated Arthur and every person in the gang, not only for them to do exactly as he wanted, but so they could never run away. Loyalty was his weapon. And it's already disproven he got crazy after the accident in Saint Dennis. What we see is a proud man who saw every plan he ever made get frustrated, one after the other. Pay attention to the little conversations in the game and maybe you will see. Like Arthur telling Tilly that a guy in the gang was murdered because he betrayed Dutch 🤦🏼��♀️

His constant flirting with Mary Beth, ignoring Tilly even though she is his "daughter". Getting angry at anyone that tried to open his eyes or show he was wrong. Micah is the villain, but he didn't manipulate Dutch, he played with his ego and Dutch decided to trust Micah because he was the only one not defying his orders. He left his "son" die alone, after stealing Arthur's strength and being responsible for his TB, after Arthur said he didn't feel comfortable doing Strauss work for him.

Dutch is a narcissist and that's what his character is about. Arthur's last words about Dutch on his journal is literally "Did Dutch became like this after everything, or was he always like this and we didn't notice?".

I love Dutch as a character, because he was very well written and he is very charming. But stop babying problematic characters because they are your favorite...

(Also, let's not forget how he treated Abigail and the other women. How Micah acted around them and Dutch never said anything. How he and the Callander brothers were constantly racist -As Lenny and Charles said- and Dutch continued to allow this treatment.) Charles and the others see Dutch for who he is in the end. Are you forgetting how a young Indigenous boy was killed just for Dutch's sick plans to happen? Or how he killed Heidi, an innocent mother in cold blood?

I rest my case now.

#arthur morgan #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 #rdr2 dutch

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silawastaken · 2 months

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I love seeing people compare music to their favourite characters and go like 'oh yeah this verse might be this character... and then this one is the other one... and then this little bit here is them both honestly. Or something like that' because I HAVE gone through every taylor swift song on evermore and folklore and compared it to skk. Sorry to be autistic on the writing account, but this is a fanfic writing account and I'm writing my second novel length fic about them so what did you expect.

folklore/evermore are very canon skk, and verge into fanon and some songs are the reason for very specific head canons, or some of the ways I write the way they perceive each other. 1989... DON'T GET ME STARTED OMFG HAVE YOU EVER LISTENED TO BLANK SPACE? I THINK IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO NOT HAVE AND OMG IT'S SO SKK CODED LIKE WTF. I HAVE VERY FIRM OPINIONS ABOUT WHICH LYRICS ARE THEIRS. Also the vault tracks literally exist what more do you want from me. 'i think about jumping off of very tall somethings just to see you come running and say the one thing I've been wanting' okay dazai pack it up you did that already, beast exists. 'i call my mom sister she said that it was for the best remind myself the more i gave you'd want me less' yeah yeah chuuya we know he left you get over it, it wasn't personal(think that line could go for either of them but the other line 'the way you faded till i left' feels more Dazai personally). Plus suburban legends. For personal reasons I struggle to listen to song without SPIRALING FUCK YOU THAT ONE PERSON SEHDHSSJNS but very skk as well 'we were born to be national treasures' is very soulmates of them. And out of the woods screams them in fanfic when they try to get better. Red, straight away all too well. They both remember it all too well. All too well skk cover with switching vocals anyone? The last time. The one with gary lightbody. Underrated song, is my favourite on that album, and SO THEM. 'this is the last time you tell me ive got it wrong, this is the last time i wont hurt you anymore' because they're fated to be together and are constantly drawn to each other and yet keep HURTING EACH OTHER RAGH. also 'we are never getting back together' is pretty funny and nice when applied to them. also state of grace. any taylor song with a mild drop of religious imagery is them cause yeah. but 'i never saw you coming, and I'll never be the same'... okay pack it up, we don't have time for your yearning. 'you were never a saint' (dazai abt chuuya) 'and i loved in shades of wrong' (bc hes toxic and doesnt know how to healthily like people) 'we learned to live with the pain, mosaic broken hearts' (bc they continue anyway and stick it out, living with the pain of being bad for each other because of how deeply they care). I almost do. Dazai after leaving. moving on to more religion, holy ground. 'for the first time i had something to lose' 'and i guess we fell apart in the usual way, and the storys got dust on every page' AAAAAA IT'S THEM. Can't really speak on debut- but I've listened to our song and picture to burn and if picture to burn isn't a vengeful chuuya idk what is. BOY OH BOY SPEAK NOW.

excuse me. one moment.

Mine- literally a skk au

Sparks fly- 'the way you move is like a rainstorm and im a house full of cards, you're the kind of reckless that should send me running' that entire verse screams dazai's fascination with corrupted chuuya, and the whole song is well yeah

back to december- dazai when they reunite just trust me on it just trust me on it. the repetition was intentional, that's how serious i am. 'i go back to december all the time' 'I got back to december to make it all right'

speak now- might just be me but it really makes me think of teen skk in fanfic harbouring urges to ruin the others relationship for 'some reason. I don't know, seeing him with her just... irks me'.

the story of us- first verse is chuuya, second verse is dazai, and the third is them both because they're LOSERS and they LOVE EACH OTHER and FUCK I'm CRYING NOW. 'id tell you i miss you but i don't know how' EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED BASTARD.

enchanted- self explanatory. for more context, i really think it's from dazai's pov in this case, could probably be both, but dazai fell first and harder so it's really like god he's been in love ever since he got kicked into that wall he wants him around forever. He held Chuuya's hand in the fight with rimbaud and then had all those close moments in the manga and went home to lie on his bed kicking his feet and giggling don't lie. (god im still crying this isn't helping)

better than revenge- they're both pretty vengeful idk it makes me think of iwsynttr for some reason

haunted- chuuya pov. 'i thought i had you figured out, something's gone terribly wrong' 'stood there and watched you walk away from everything we had' they're so sad, but the general idea of chuuya thinking he has figured out dazai and knowing how he thinks and then dazai just leaves suddenly and he's like 'Wow! I thought i knew you. How do i forget this'. 'wont finish what you started' bringing chuuya into the mafia then leaving it.

last kiss- 'you told me you love me so why did you go away' chuuya pov again oh god it hurts why am i doing this to myself? 'never imagined we'd end like this, your name, forever the name on my lips' yep yep ow.

LONG LIVE.- LISTEN. TO. THE. SONG. AND TELL ME IT'S NOT DAZAI AND CHUUYA. I COULD DO A WHOLE ANALYSIS ON JUST THIS SONG. 'promise me this, that you'll stand by me forever, but if god forbid fate should step in, and force us into a goodbye...please tell them my name, tell them how the crowds went wild, tell them how i hope they shine, long live the walls we crashed through, i had the time of my life with you' FUCK IT'S DAZAI AN HE'S IN LOVE WITH CHUUYA AND DOESNT KNOW ODAS GONNA DIE YET, JUST THINKS HE DOESNT GET TO KEEP ANYTHING HE WANTS. FUUUUUCK. THEY'RE IN LOVE AND DAZAI WANTS IT REMEMBERED PLEASE I'M SO SAD.

anyway, i can't pretend I'm normal about skk anymore i haven't even covered fearless, reputation, lover or midnights please somebody encourage me to actually write full things dedicated to each album and the most fitting songs from said albums please i'll do it and plus i need to actually gather proof for my autism diagnosis appointment so this would be a good way to to that probably. anyway yeah this'll never make it out my drafts lol

#this is finally out of my drafts after months #dedicated to the anon who asked and the one who said abt the fearless song idk if you're the same person but either way love you lots 🤞#i love taylor swift so much #i love skk more #im sorry for this #but the brainrot is real #this was written at like 3am in January #bsd #silas yaps #soukoku #soukoku fanfiction #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #bungou stray dogs #taylor swift

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loveywon · 1 year

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♡𓂃SLAP ME !

pairing: jeongin x (gn) reader

wc: 1.9k

synopsis: you can't hurt your soulmate physically, so what happens when you accidentally hurt jeongin?

warnings: soulmate au, uni au, friends 2 lovers, cursing, reader gets slapped LMAO, beomgyu, isa, heeseung, and ningning mentioned, not proofread, umm I think that's it

a/n: pulled this outta my ass... n i have an 8am final tmr… SOMEONE PREPARE MY DEATH BED!!!!!

You’ve only met Jeongin recently, you’d say for about two weeks, thanks to mutual friends. He was sweet, and had the most adorable smile you’ve ever seen in your entire life. You think you’re lucky to have met him, he does not wrong in your eyes.

Though, he’s quite clumsy. He’s spilled pepsi and fanta on your friends multiple times (total times of five - not that you’re keeping count), dropped a whole pizza box, and slipped and tripped in front of everyone in the dining halls. He’s never spilled anything on you, which is quite surprising considering he’s been next to you every time he has spilled something.

He would always turn to you, giving a slight awkward chuckle before helping his friend grab some napkins and wiping them off (which does literally nothing, their clothes are stained for life now).

As to why he somehow never spills his drink on you? He thinks he knows the answer.

“Jeongin, you do know that in this world, you can never hurt your soulmate, physically, and they also can not hurt you,” His mother explained to him one night in bed when he was thirteen, just about to graduate middle school. He’s half asleep, but he still listens to what his mom says as she kisses him on the forehead goodnight.

“Mom! I’m too old for you to tuck me in every night still,” He pouts, though his eyes are closed and his lips soon curve into a slight smile. His mother only laughs softly at his antics before leaving his room.

Jeongin never considered himself to be a hopeless romantic. He never really paid much mind to love. Of course he found people pretty, but he’s never thought about dating, or actually finding his real soulmate. He doesn’t think it’s weird, but his friends always make comments and ask him if he’s lonely and if they want their help to find his soulmate.

He’s patient, and he’ll wait for his soulmate to find him.

“Y/n, this is my friend, Jeongin,” Heeseung gestures towards a boy with wavy, soft brown hair. You look meticulously at him, and Jeongin thought he had an eye booger or something that caused you to look at him so weirdly. He panics, reaching for his face to find whatever you’re judging him for. That’s when you crack a toothy smile, grinning at him.

“Hi! Nice to meet you. Heeseung told me you’re a bioengineering major. I’m a neuroscience major.” You greet excitedly, and the difference between how you stared at him and the way you spoke almost gave him whiplash.

You’re happy that Heeseung introduced you to Jeongin. You know about the soulmate thing, it’s all your friends have bugged you about. They’ve all found their soulmate in freshman year of college or some time during high school, yet you’re still lagging behind.

But still, you doubt that Jeongin could actually be your soulmate. It seemed too good to be true, really. He was cute, had personality like a saint, funny, and had sharp features that always made you stare for longer than you should be, and you think there’s no way he hasn’t found his soulmate yet.

It’s as if it’s unspoken between the two of you. You don’t bring up soulmates, and neither does he. Whenever you two hang out in a group, it always gets brought up but both you and Jeongin stay quiet until the subject is changed, just smiling and nodding along.

It’s not like it was bothering, of course not! It was just that, you knew you wanted Jeongin to be your soulmate. You liked him! Maybe a little too much, and now you’re afraid to act upon anything because the romanticized idea of Jeongin that you curated in your head leads you to believe that he definitely has a significant other.

A little part of you still likes to be a little delusional as you don’t even bother to wait for a bit to answer his texts. You always answer immediately, despite knowing (assuming) that he has another soulmate waiting for him.

You and a group of friends, including Jeongin, are out bowling because Jeongin suggested it, and even though he did get bullied in the groupchat for even suggesting such a lame sport, you all met up at the bowling alley.

The ever so competitive Jeongin that he is, he decides to start a competition. “Heeseung, you think you can score more points than me?” He wiggled his brows tauntingly, and of course, Heeseung would never back down from a challenge proposed by his best friend.

“Me, Gyu, and Isa will be on one team, and you, Y/n, and Ningning will be on the other team, okay?” Heeseung proposed to Jeongin, as he simply agreed. As if you and your other friends weren’t sitting there, unable to choose what team you wanted to be on.

“What the hell? I wanna be on Hee’s team,” you frown, obviously joking as you cross your arms over your chest. Jeongin fakes offense, palm pressed against his heart, “What?? What’s wrong with being on my team?? We can win, Y/n, I believe in you and Ningning!” He cheered encouragingly, giving you and Ningning a thumbs up and a wide dimpled smile.You roll your eyes, looking away from him to hide the smile that’s fighting to appear on your face.

If only you knew how bowling works.

When it’s your turn, you hesitatingly get up from your seat and walk to grab a bowling bowl. You stand awkwardly in front of your lane, and despite seeing everyone else go before you, you haven’t caught on a single thing on what to do.

Jeongin senses your hesitation (more like he was getting impatient because he desperately wanted to win against Heeseung) and gets up from his seat to assist you. He walks up behind you, and you’re too confused to even hear him get up from his seat, so when his hand lands on your shoulder, you drop the heavy, 14 pound bowling ball (you didn’t check the weight beforehand) onto Jeongin’s foot.

Obviously, his first reaction is to be dramatic and yell an “OW!”, but he realizes there is no actual pain running through his body. You’re too busy panicking, because holy shit, that probably hurts like balls (haha)! You’re onto your knees in an instant, trying to help ease the pain but you don’t know what to do because his shoe is in the way to check for any injuries.

“Are you okay? Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry, really!” You say repeatedly, looking up at him from your position. He panics seeing you down on your knees for him and he instantly holds your shoulders up to make you stand up.

His throat is dry, and he doesn’t really know what to say. Did he really feel no pain? He just had to test it again.

He grabs the bowling bowl that’s left forgotten on the ground after your panic, and he hands it to you. “Can you drop it on my foot again?” He asks you, and your eyes bulge out of your head.

“What?! Are you a masochist or something? No!” You refuse, you’re confused as to why he’s asking for you to drop it on him again. Your panic hasn’t settled yet to put the pieces together yet.

“Please! Just do it,” he almost begs, pushing the ball towards your chest as you stare at him bewildered. You hesitate to grab the ball, but he looks like he’s about to get on his knees like you did previously just for you to drop a ball on him again.

You sigh, biting your bottom lip as you drop the ball. You visibly wince when the bowling ball drops on his foot once more, and this time Jeongin is more prepared to await a reaction.

Nothing. No pain.

A bright smile cracks onto his face. He’s the happiest man on earth right now, he’s so happy he thinks he could cry. He remembers telling Heeseung to finally introduce you to him when he first spots you and Heeseung walking together to class one time on campus. Jeongin was going to go up to him to say hi, but he stopped in his tracks after seeing you. He’s never seen you before, and he thinks that you may be the person that Heeseung has been talking to him about for a few weeks now.

“I saw them, the person you’re talking to, on campus today!” Jeongin says excitedly as he meets up with Heeseung at the dining hall.

Heeseung gives him a confused look with an eyebrow raised, “What? I didn’t see them all day…are you talking about Y/n? That’s just my friend, we share religious class together.” Jeongin stifles a shocked face. He’s happy, you were incredibly attractive, so he was a bit relieved to hear that you were just a friend to Heeseung.

“In that case, can you introduce me then?”

When Jeongin doesn’t react to the ball dropping on his foot, you stare at him weirdly. Maybe he is a freak and a masochist and liked being hurt, because you swear that bowling ball said fourteen whole pounds.

“Slap me, right now, seriously!” He says, a bright smile painting his face. You only give him a blank stare.

“Jeongin, I’m not gonna feed into your fantasies, you’re being a little weird, not gonna lie…” You trail off, but you swear you’ve never seen him smile that brightly before. All your other friends are just staring at the two of you oddly, some deciding to go onto their phones because it’s not the first time you and Jeongin have been in your own world whenever you all hang out. They never minded, they were secretly all rooting for you two to get together.

“Y/n, do you trust me?” Jeongin asks you suddenly, ignoring what you just said. You raise a brow at him. Of course you trust him, you think he broke the world record for gaining your trust in such a short amount of time.

“...Yeah,” you reply a bit stand-offish, because he really is being a little weird, but at the same time, it’s Jeongin. You know him, or at least, you like to think that you know him and that he would never do anything to hurt you (not like he can, anyway).

Jeongin’s hand reaches out to your face, and for a moment, you panic. What is exactly going on, and what is doing? Is he going to touch your face? Is the moment you’ve been dreaming about finally coming?

He slapped you. He literally, physically, slapped you across the face.

Your jaw drops to the floor. Your head is turned to the side because of the slap, but there is no after-sting and your cheek isn’t red from the slap. And that’s when it clicked.

“Okay, I get that we’re like, soulmates and everything, but you’re never slapping me again. You didn’t even have to slap me! You could have just told me like a normal fucking person??” You want to yell at his face, but you can’t help the excited grin that graces your features because Jeongin is your freaking soulmate.

“Um…sorry. Got excited I guess. You can slap me in return if you want!”

PERM. TAGLIST @hafsa-hoofsa-heefs !

#skz #stray kids #stray kids fanfic #skz fanfic #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #jeongin #jeongin skz #jeongin fanfic #jeongin x reader #jeongin imagines #jeongin scenarios #skz scenarios #stray kids imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop fanfic #loveywon skz

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frevandrest · 3 months

Note

Did Saint-Just ever talk about women’s education?

He sure did! In his Fragments sur les institutions républicaines, he details his idea for the education of girls. Which is as follows:

Les filles sont élevées dans la maison maternelle.

(The girls are educated in maternal home)

That's it. And it comes after a lengthily discussion on the education of boys. So it does sound like SJ remembered girls only as an afterthought, and didn't have much to say on the topic. (I mean, he definitely didn't have much to say on the topic because if he had more ideas, he'd write them down).

Now, I am not sure what this means exactly. That girls should not have much education? Or that any education done to girls should be done in the home? (Those are two very, very different options). SJ was big on protecting girls and women from sexual violence (sometimes seen as going outside without a protector), so maybe this is a reflection on that? Don't get me wrong, this whole education for women is a big L from him, but he grew up at a time where female literacy was becoming a norm, at least for bourgeoise girls. They would get some education on things deemed important for a girl; SJ's own sisters were literate. So I doubt he would want girls to have absolutely no education, or only what their mother can teach (?) I mean, maybe? But that would be mega stupid, because you want the woman of the future Republic to know enough about the world so they can instill patriotic values in their daughters, so they can be good mothers and wives of the future republicans, if nothing else.

So my interpretation is that he got caught so much into developing that idea of friendship-filled, Sparta-inspired program of education for boys that he forgot about the existence of girls until late. And he didn't care that much about it, past "yes, girls get some education". So yes, an L from SJ on this one, but it is too limited to conclude what exactly he thought about the education of women or what he saw as an "appropriate" education for them.

#ask #anonymous #frev #saint-just #my guess is that he wouldn't approve of very educated women #so definitely an L #but literacy and knowing at least a bit about things was a norm #in fact #there is the whole late 18c push for spouses to be closer and hold conversations #and the husband was expected to educate his wife on things and they would talk about it #it was seen as progressive and bonding approach #because the push was to see your wife as a companion and not just a sex and baby factory #so husband educating his wife and teaching her stuff was valued #and we see examples of that - like le bas offering to teach babet stuff #no idea if sj shared those beliefs #but those were popular in his social circle #so i can see this arrangement as being a continuation of education for women in his dream republic #just a guess though - he didn't speak of it anywhere

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wendytestabrat · 8 months

Text

a subtle kyman moment no one talks about

ok i’ve talked abt this a lot before how cartman & kyle have A LOT more in common with each other and are more similar to each other than they are to stan with a lot of moments of those two either gaining up on stan together or selling him out some good examples are “all about mormons” when they made fun of stan for being friends with gary and made all those gay jokes (wow projecting much), the obvious betrayal in “you’re getting old” & “ass burgers” when kyle replaced stan with cartman, & ofc in the black friday trilogy when stan wanted to be on the ps4 side but cartman & kyle wanted xboxes. in fact stan was the first one to initiate not wanting to be friends anymore in “south parq vaccination special”, which goes to show imo that stan is the real outsider of the group at this point and doesn’t feel supported by the other boys in the dynamic. but what i wanna talk abt is that scene in “the pandemic special” where they’re at build a bear and stan has that breakdown and cries and shit bc that was lowkey a kyman moment too but ya’ll didn’t see it. what really stood out to me in that scene was how much cartman & kyle fucking gaslit stan and made him out to be crazy….for you know HAVING NORMAL HUMAN EMOTIONS ABOUT THE PANDEMIC. it pisses me off bc stan is way more rational than cartman & kyle are and he keeps his emotions in check way more often and then puts up with all of THEIR bullshit when they’re constantly acting out and throwing tantrums like a baby in every episode, so it’s like they couldn’t let stan have this ONE moment where he got to express his feelings and act out and do something bad??? even tho cartman & kyle do dumbass reckless immature shit and act on their emotions all the time???? they make him out to be the bad guy for going to a build-a-bear that’s closed and trying to stuff a bear for butters (even tho he was just projecting his own feelings abt the pandemic) with no employees there. like bitch please, i mean yeah breaking into a closed build a bear is a dumb thing to do but cartman & kyle shouldn’t be acting like they’re the saints here bc they’re not and they’ve done WAY worse shit lol. i mean that holier-than-thou attitude can be expected of kyle but it was surprising to see it from cartman too. and there are so many moments were stan goes along with their bullshit when they wanna do something that’s illegal or fucked up, but the one time stan gets the idea to do something fucked up they’re like “noooo that’s wrong”. the part tho where cartman is literally backing up KYLE and not stan and is like “stan you really need employee assistance for this” had me like

bc u would not expect that from cartman considering he’s a sociopathic maniac so if another boy gets an idea to do something fucked up and illegal he would be totally on board LOL like how he was willing to help stan steal the baby cows in s6 but at this point in the series you can see how the chemistry between cartman & kyle has grown so strong to the point that it’s like neither of those two give a shit about stan anymore and wanna support him on anything, when before stan was like the glue that kept the group together and it seemed like cartman & kyle wouldn’t even had been hanging out with each other if it wasn’t for their mutual friendship with stan. i think that goes to show that cartman has developed A LOT and he’s become more similar to kyle and values kyle’s opinion above the other boys when the dynamic used to be more of cartman getting stan & kenny to gain up against kyle. ESPECIALLY that scene in “bebe’s boobs destroy society” where cartman suggests they kick kyle out of the group or all those times when he’s like “ok guys i guess we just have to kill kyle” LOL

#kyman #south park #stan marsh #cartman x kyle #KYMANRANTGARBAGE

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bella-rose29 · 8 months

Text

Golden Boy (part two)

When Sturmhond returns to Ketterdam a few years after leaving university abruptly, he runs into an old partner, who is working as a translator in Kerch.

Word count: 3.7k

Warnings: swearing, drinking, drunkenness, mentions of being shot (past tense), mentions of injury (present tense but it's literally kicking a box. edit: someone gets slapped), an extremely long speech (I'm so sorry it's literally 300 words)

Tag list: @bubybubsters, @el-de-phi, @hauntedenthusiasttragedy, @iambored24601, @itsyoboo-jassy, @karensirkobabes, @kentucky-criedfricken, @naushtheaspiringauthor, @notoakay, @simbaaas-stuff, @thelov3lybookworm

As always, if you'd like to be added to my Nikolai tag list, here's the place to ask!

Docking was successful that morning, everything going smoothly.

The crew of the Volkvolny poured off the ship and onto the waterfront of Ketterdam, breathing in the smoke and fumes that polluted the air, shouting with joy at the many bars and taverns they could already see.

Sturmhond shook his head, laughing at his crew's antics.

It had been five years since Nikolai had left Ketterdam in the night, running away from his life as the second prince of Ravka to pursue one of privateering under the name Sturmhond, and he hadn't come back to the city since. He hoped he didn't run into any trouble, not wanting to spend more time here than was necessary; he could already feel the unease that he might see her.

Tamar and Tolya came up on either side of him, the twins each clapping a hand on his shoulder as they passed.

"Don't spend too long looking moodily at the skyline, Captain. You've got a bet to lose," Tamar said, walking backwards as she pointed at him.

"A bet that I will win, Tamar, a bet that I will win," he called back. She'd bet that she could drink him under the table. He'd bet that she was wrong.

He started off in the same direction his crew had taken, casting a last look at his ship to check that everything was secure before entering the tavern that the twins had disappeared into.

He was immediately confronted by noisy chatter, drunkards singing loudly (and badly), others shouting to be heard over the singing, making others shout over them, everyone trying to be heard. The floor was mildly sticky from spilt ales, and the air was close. Finding the table his colleagues were sat at, he ordered a drink, joining them.

"Let's have you, then!" Tamar declared, and Nikolai complied.

~~~

"I don' understand! I was 'aving Tolya help meee!"

"Ah but consider: I have a higher drinking threshold than you, Tamar. Also, you were cheating?!"

"Noooo! I would never cheat! You're a cheater, with your cheating cheaty cheatiness!"

Nikolai laughed, loud and booming, and got up to get some water for his friend. Reaching the bar, he was poured a jug and given some glasses, and was just about to head back to the table when his breath caught in his throat and his heart skipped a beat.

She won't recognise you, he thought, forcing himself to walk forwards. She won't, she won't, she won't. He repeated the words like a mantra, and by the time he made it back to his crew he almost felt that he couldn't say anything else.

"You alright, Captain?" Tolya asked, laying a hand on his arm. "You're pulse is crazy right now."

"I'm fine, thank you. Give Tamar this." He passed over some water, taking deep breaths at the same time.

Saints, what was wrong with him? He sees Y/n once and starts having difficulty breathing? He frowned. Actually, that's not new. But why was she sat with a group of dodgy looking men in a dark corner of the room? His frown deepened, worry now flitting across his face. Maybe she's in a gang? She seemed actively involved in the conversation, but Nikolai wasn't a good enough lip reader to know what was being said.

"Captain?" Tolya's voice sounded from his left.

"Hmm?"

"Isn't that Flint? The pirate mercenary?" Tolya pointed, and just his luck, Nikolai followed the finger to one of the men sat next to Y/n.

Shit, she is in a gang.

He felt a pang of hurt then, that she seemed to be part of a group of pirates when she'd turned down sailing the seas with him all those years ago. He regretted what he'd done, how he'd left things, but he truly had believed she'd be better off without him. Seeing her now, looking somehow even more beautiful than she had been five years ago, was bringing back memories he'd rather forget, but knowing he now had a chance to try and get her back (or recruit her from a different ship), he stood up, indeed recognising Flint. "Let's go, that's him. Bastard stole my favourite sword."

Closing in on the secluded table, Nikolai was able to hear more of their conversation.

"I can't figure out what language that is, can you?"

"Fjerdan," Nikolai replied, surprised at the language being used. Flint was Kaelish, so why was he in conversation with some Fjerdans?. He picked up some words before they noticed him, but all thoughts went out of his head when Y/n turned her head to look at him.

"Sturmhond," Flint spoke in Kerch, lip curling at the sight of the privateer.

"Flint, always a pleasure. Don't suppose you still have my sword, do you? Quite fond of that one."

"Oh I've got it. In fact, I've got it right here." He pulled it out of the scabbard at his side, pointing it in Nikolai's direction (apparently) threateningly, and Nikolai recognised the blade as his own.

"Perfect," he rubbed his hands together. "Hand it over, I've got a crew to get back to." Flint laughed at the outstretched hand in front of him, then spat on the floor next to his chair. Y/n spoke some hushed words to him, gesturing subtly towards the Fjerdans.

"Alright. You've got five seconds to get out of here, Sturmhond, before I use your own sword to gut you."

"I'm not leaving without it." He set his jaw.

"Ghezen's Hand, just leave. This is a business meeting and you're fucking it all up, alright?" Y/n's voice surprised him. He hadn't expected her to speak, and having not heard it for five years he was taken aback. "What?" she demanded. "Why are you looking at me weirdly?"

"Sorry, sorry. Flint, when you're done here, come and find me. I'm getting that sword back."

"Stop obsessing over your sword, Ginger Boy, and piss off."

The title made his heart ache, knowing that she'd once called him her Golden Boy. Had it been someone at court naming him that, he probably would have hit them, but it was her, and he found that he didn't mind.

Ginger Boy hurt though.

He put his hands up, turning and stalking back to the table. He stopped a waitress, ordering a whisky despite the extortionate amounts of alcohol he'd already drunk.

This is going to be a long night.

~~~

Thirty minutes later Flint swaggered over, bracing his hands on the table and leaning over to look Nikolai in the eye.

"Right then, pretty boy. How much for the sword?"

"Aw, you think I'm pretty?"

"What? No! The sword! How much are you willing to give for it!"

"Right! Right, yes, of course. Uh," he mock pondered for a moment, tapping a finger against his chin. "Nothing."

"Then you're not having it."

"I am, I'm just not trading for it. Who's the girl?"

Y/n had come over with Flint, and now looked up from where she stood a few paces away, arms crossed over her chest.

"The girl is my translator. Got in a tricky spot with some Fjerdan slavers," he grimaced. "All sorted now, though. Well, if you're not willing to trade anything for the sword, then I'll be off."

"Ah, shame. We were just starting to get along! How about I walk you out?" He ignored the protests of Flint, strutting past and opening the door. Outside, Nikolai basked in the quieter street, turning at the flash of noise that came when Flint stepped out after him. "Now. Has he paid you yet?" he asked Y/n. She shook her head. "Here's what's gonna happen. You're gonna pay this lovely lady here, and then you're gonna hand over the sword. Then you're gonna walk away, and you're gonna leave me and my crew alone, alright?" Flint scoffed.

"And why should I do all o' that? I'll pay her, sure, but not the rest."

"I think you'll want to, Flinty." Nikolai leaned in close, trying not to breathe in too deeply the fish and alcohol smell emanating off of the pirate. "Or the Fjerdans will find out just what you've been doing with the money they're paying you." He pulled back, and Flint's eyes went wide.

"You- you- what?! How could you possibly- what?!" the pirate spluttered.

Nikolai let a glint come into his eye, a smirk form on his face, and said "The next time you have a private conversation, maybe check that nobody will hear anything, yeah? My Fjerdan's pretty good."

"Fine, fine! Here, here's your cash, and have the stupid sword! Jus' don't tell anyone what you 'eard alright?" And he shoved money at Y/n and the blade at Nikolai, leaving abruptly. "Filthy privateers, think they own the place," he muttered under his breath, pushing his hands into his pockets.

"Do I know you?"

Nikolai snapped his head around to look at Y/n.

"No. No, I'd remember meeting someone as gorgeous as you, darling." He threw in a wink for good measure. Her lip curled in disgust as she counted the notes.

"Yeah, and I'd remember meeting a fuckboy like you." She turned and went back into the tavern, pocketing the money. He paused for a moment, thinking quickly. Running after her, he caught up with Y/n just as she put her foot on the bottom step of the stairs to the upper rooms. She raised an eyebrow. "What? You're not coming with me. Go back to your pirate crew, yeah?"

"I'm a privateer, there's a difference."

"I know there's a difference. Got your licence to hand then?"

"Yep. Carry it everywhere." He patted his breast pocket. "And I don't want to come up, I want to offer you a job." He didn't really need a translator on his crew, what with his own language skills, but he thought it would be worth a shot.

"Keep talking."

"Actually, is there anywhere private upstairs? Just to talk, I swear!" At her eyes rolling he held his hands up, desperation creeping into his voice.

"Fine. Five minutes, then I want you gone."

"Of course."

She led him up the stairs, then across the landing and into a small room with a bed and a desk, clothes littered on the floor.

"This is your room." It wasn't a question, and he didn't need to see her nod to know he was right.

"Don't go getting any ideas, alright." She paused, staring at him for a moment. "You're sure I don't know you?"

"Positive. Impossible that we've ever met before."

"Improbable," she said, moving away. He stared dumbly after her, jaw going slack.

"What?"

"Usually people mean improbable, not impossible. It's just a stupid thing someone said once."

"Someone?" he probed.

"Yeah. Old friend. Well, old partner. Hang on," she narrowed her eyes at him. "Why are you so interested?"

"Sounds like someone I know, that's all." He swallowed thickly under her gaze, knowing that she was reading him. "So, the job?" She nodded, still observing him. "How's your Zemeni? Because I have a new member of my crew who speaks nothing else, and only a handful of us speak the language, but we don't have the time. You'd live on the ship and we'd drop you off when he knew enough that we could teach him as we go, and I'll pay handsomely." She titled her head, considering.

"How much?"

"What's your rate?"

"50 Kruge a day."

He raised his eyebrows.

"What? If you don't like it, you can piss off. If I'm gonna be living on a ship I want compensation for my discomfort," she shrugged.

"Fine. 50 Kruge a day, for however many days you need. We're leaving tomorrow afternoon, if you can make it." He desperately hoped she would say yes, deciding he couldn't take her saying that he'd be leaving on his own again.

"Okay, fine by me. How many bells?"

"Four." His whole body relaxed, pleased that she was coming with him.

"Sure. See you tomorrow." Nikolai took it as his cue to leave, closing the door softly behind him.

~~~

Nikolai didn't sleep that night, mind keeping him awake as it raced through every interaction and memory he'd had with Y/n in University. He had a chance to make things right, even if she didn't know it, and Saints be damned if he would fuck things up with her again. The next morning was hell for Nikolai, the hours until four bells dragging, not at all helped by his lack of sleep.

"Ugh, come on," he muttered, stood on deck observing the waterfront. He'd run out of things to do to keep himself busy; one of the issues with being so organised. He liked the chaos and spontaneity of being on the sea, but he also liked knowing exactly what was happening at any given moment, leading to an incredibly well-planned journey. He always accounted for every possibility, but Y/n might just throw a spanner in the works.

Nikolai heard an argument forming, and noticed the Zemeni boy and two of the Ravkan Grisha trying to communicate. Erumi had been part of the crew for two months now, but still only spoke his native language, and while Nikolai could speak Zemeni fluently, and often gave the boy his jobs in the language, he certainly did not have the time to teach him Ravkan, or indeed any other. Most of the crew couldn't understand him, and the ones that did were like Nikolai; able to communicate in Zemeni, but having no time to teach.

It wasn't wholly unnecessary having Y/n on board, then. She was needed here, and not just for Nikolai's selfish desires.

"What's going on?" he asked the Grisha.

"Idiot isn't doing his job right, but we can't tell him how to do it because he doesn't speak Ravkan," one of them replied.

"Erumi? What is it you're trying to do, maybe I can help?"

"I can't remember which knot to use for this one, and they're getting mad at me because of it, but I can't talk to them, and it's just-"

"Woah, slow down! Let's start with the knot, yeah? Here," Nikolai took the rope and slowly moved through the actions, making sure the boy knew exactly what was going on. Untying it, he passed it over to Erumi, telling him to tie it himself. Satisfied with the end result, Nikolai turned to the two Ravkans.

"Look. I know it's difficult, but you just need to be patient. There's no use getting mad or raising your voices at him, because he won't understand what you're saying. Try and be gentle, and show him through your actions, not words. Before you start grumbling," he said, noticing the displeased looks on their faces, "we're getting a translator today, and she's gonna teach him enough Ravkan that we can all understand each other better, okay?" They nodded, and he dismissed them.

"Captain? Look!" Erumi showed him the knot, having been tying and retying it, and Nikolai smiled.

"Good job! Right, you go and take a break for a bit, yeah? I'll see you in a bit." The boy nodded, grinning widely, and Nikolai watched him go.

"Cute kid."

He jumped halfway out of his skin, one hand flying to his pistol, the other to his sword handle.

"What the fuck?! Where did you even come from?"

"My mother's womb," Y/n said. "And 'what the fuck' sums it all up quite nicely, I'd say." She needed to stop quoting him, it was making his ego swell.

"Why?" he frowned.

"You speak Zemeni, and you look like you've got plenty of time, so why do you need me?"

Four bells sounded then, and he startled.

"You're early?"

She shrugged. "Figured I might as well be, gives me time to run away if I need to. Why do you need me?"

"Once we get going, I really don't have much time. I'm captain, and so I have to oversee everyone. I can't spend too much time with any one person or someone else will think I've got favourites. My whole reputation is built on being equal, and if nothing else I don't want to start any mutinies."

"Oh. Fair I guess. Where would I be staying, then?"

He led her into the cabins under the deck, pointing out his and the twins'. "Yours is the one at the end, you can go and have a look if you like." She did, leaving Nikolai in the corridor to ponder his next move. When she reappeared a few minutes later, she just nodded.

"Everything alright?"

"It'll do. I'd like a proof of payment before we leave, just to make sure I'm going to get properly compensated."

"Of course, here." He pushed open the door to his own cabin, walking over to the desk at the back of the room.

"Privateering for Dummies? Should I be worried?"

"Oh, I'd actually forgotten I had that." He studied her, wondering if she recognised the book. Hopefully she didn't open the front cover; he'd nicked it from the University library and the stamp was still on the front page. "And no, you don't need to worry at all, you're in very safe hands." He rummaged around in a drawer for a moment, then pulled out a stack of notes. "50 Kruge a day, yeah?"

"Yep."

"Here's your first day then."

"Thanks."

Saints, this was awkward. She hadn't stopped studying at him, eyes clearly examining everything about him, and it was making him sweat.

"I'll go and introduce you?"

"Sure."

He wanted the floor to swallow him up.

~~~

An hour later they were on their way, and Y/n and Erumi had been getting along well so far. They sat off to the side, hidden from the sun in the shade of the upper deck, and from Nikolai's position at the wheel he caught snippets of their conversation.

There wasn't much interesting, just Y/n teaching Erumi basic Ravkan words such as 'ship', 'please', 'thank you', and the like, but when they took a break (he was not a fast learner), Nikolai found it hard to tune out. He knew it was wrong to listen, and he really did try to think about something else so that he wasn't eavesdropping, but then he'd heard his name, his real name, and he couldn't help himself.

"Wait, you went to school with the Nikolai Lantsov? That's so cool!"

"If cool is being an arse then yeah," she replied, and although he couldn't see her face, Nikolai knew that she had a look of disgust on it. "He was nice at first, persistent in a kinda cute way, but then he turned out just like every other rich person, using me to make him feel better about himself."

Shit.

She really thought that about him? He'd been trying to distance himself as a defence mechanism so that when he did leave it would hurt less for both of them. He'd spent the last five years wishing he could know why she'd been so torn up about him going when she'd already said that she was staying, but now he wanted to erase what he'd just heard from his memory.

"Damn, that must have hurt?"

"Yeah, it did," her voice was hoarse, and she cleared her throat. "I thought he was gonna be the one, you know? And then he left me alone and made me feel like shit, so..." She trailed off, and Nikolai passed the wheel to someone else. He had to get out of here, go somewhere he couldn't hear them. Pushing himself down the stairs, he headed below deck and towards his cabin, locking the door and throwing himself onto the bed.

"Fuck," he whispered, although significantly more muffled given his face was in a pillow. Trying to win her over might be more difficult than he'd anticipated.

~~~

The next morning, Nikolai got up early, having not slept too well in the night. Washing and getting dressed, he went up on deck, and was surprised to see Y/n sat on a crate, looking at the sunrise.

"Morning," he said quietly, drawing up a box to join her.

"Oh, hi. Thought I was the only one up, apart from the skeleton crew."

"Couldn't sleep much last night, figured I'd just get up. You?"

"Same. Too busy thinking about things."

"Wanna talk about it?" At her guarded expression, he quickly said "Feel free not to, though. I know it's not my place to know everything about you, I just thought you might want someone to listen."

They were quiet for a while, sat in peaceful silence watching the sun rise over the sea.

"You just remind me of someone I loved."

Her voice was so quiet he had to strain to hear her, but when his mind registered the words, his heart ached in his chest.

"'Loved'? What did they do to mess that one up?"

"He uh... he... sorry." She swallowed thickly, and Nikolai could practically feel her nerves.

"Take your time. There's no rush."

Nodding, she continued, and Nikolai held his breath. "We met in University. He uh... we were together, and then he wanted to leave and I wanted to stay. He kept away from me for a while before he left, and when I confronted him about it he just... stood there. I have this thing about rich people, and I thought that he would be different and be better than the ones that told me to just 'stop being poor', but then he... then he didn't try and fight for me, and that hurt, you know? I would have been fine with trying long distance, but he just wanted me to leave. So, yeah. I don't mean that that's why you remind me of him, by the way," she hurriedly added. "I just mean that, sometimes, the way you talk reminds me of him, or the look you get on your face every now and then. I know you're not him, it's just weird how similar those things are about you both. And I never really... I never really stopped loving him. We were only together- well, technically two weeks, but the second one he was ignoring me, so... But I did love him, and I still do five years on, and it sucks, because I trusted him and he let me down."

Nikolai had forgotten to breathe, heart both lifting at her confession that she still loved him, and sinking at how shattered he'd left her heart.

"That..." he cleared his throat, surprised at how hoarse it was. "I'm sorry," he settled for.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for. It's not like you're actually him." Nikolai only smiled, pain filling his expression as he turned away and moved to leave. "Where are you going?"

"I need to have my morning meeting with the twins. They're probably wondering where I am. I'll leave you in peace."

"Oh, okay," she smiled, small and tentative, and he offered one back. Walking away, he muttered another "I'm sorry" under his breath, fiddling with the chain around his neck.

~~~

Y/n wrinkled her nose for the fourth time in the last ten minutes as Erumi pronounced yet another Ravkan work wrong.

Ghezen's Hand, he's shit at this.

To be fair to him, she probably wasn't being the best teacher either, having been left confused ever since the talk she'd had with Sturmhond the previous morning. He was so similar to Nikolai she was half convinced it was him, and the only reason she had any doubt was that he hadn't shown any sign that he recognised her. Remembering the conversation she'd had with Nikolai in that coffee shop all those years ago, he had mentioned that he would get himself Tailored, and the Privateering for Dummies book she'd seen in Sturmhond's cabin couldn't be a coincidence. Then there was the whole 'Volkvolny' and 'Sturmhond' thing, and the link between 'wolf of the waves' and the dog theme in his name was far too closely linked to the nickname 'Sobachka' that Nikolai had admitted to for Y/n's liking.

"Y/n?"

Blinking out of her thoughts, she noticed Erumi looking expectantly at her, eyes wide. The boy was barely 18, and was trying to grow a beard (key word: trying), and she wondered how he ended up here. She knew that Sturmhond recruited practically anyone, so long as they worked hard, since his crew were from all walks of life, but Erumi had mentioned that he'd chosen to join the Volkvolny, and Y/n was curious.

"I think that's enough for now, yeah?"

"Oh, okay. Want to talk?"

"Actually, I wanted to ask, why are you part of this crew? I mean, you don't understand anybody unless they're speaking your language."

"I'm an orphan, and the youngest of three. My siblings didn't want me around, so I left. I heard about a privateer who got his name from feeding a captain's fingers to his pet dog, and I thought 'that's cool'."

"You thought that was cool? You need help if you thought that was cool, Erumi."

"No, not like that, I just meant, it would be cool to work with someone like that, to be someone worth talking about. I'd also heard about how inclusive he is, and although I grew up in Novyi Zem, the people in my village didn't like that I'm zowa. Figured if anybody would accept me, it would be him. And if he can feed somebody's fingers to their pet dog and not get squeamish, then I'll be protected too."

"That's... that's actually not a bad reason. Wanting protection and acceptance. I definitely spoke to one girl earlier who said she was in this line of work because apparently guys think it's hot."

"I'm sure they do," Erumi replied. "And I'm sure that she'll go far in life." The two of them talked for a little while longer, Y/n trying to teach him a few more words, giving up very quickly.

"We'll carry on a bit later, give you a chance to do some jobs," she said in Zemeni. He nodded, bounding off, and she had no idea how he had so much energy.

Nikolai always had energy too, she thought.

Being on this boat was obviously driving her crazy. She had stubbornly refused to think about Nikolai for the last five years, but now that she was here, close to a man so similar to her Golden Boy, her mind wouldn't let her forget him. He'd been weird the morning before, apologising with such sincerity for somebody that supposedly didn't know her, and her suspicions about who Sturmhond really was were only growing. Y/n watched him now, talking animatedly to Tamar, and in certain light his ginger hair looked almost blond. The colour seemed to change every day, some days being a bright shocking red that drew the eyes, on others, such as this one, it was muted, more yellow than orange. His eyes were always changing, too. Always a weird muddy green, but sometimes bright green like the beginning of spring, and at others, a dark shade more similar to the fir trees of Fjerda.

She spent the rest of the morning sat watching the waves, spotting the occasional dolphin breaking the water. A loud laugh startled her out of her reverie, and she whipped her head round, expecting to see Nikolai since it sounded just like him. At only seeing Sturmhond, however, her hand drifted up to her neck, rubbing at where the chain used to sit. Y/n frowned, brows drawing together, and then she froze where she sat, tears staring to prick at the corners of her eyes.

Hanging out of Sturmhond's white shirt, the silver flashing in the bright midday sunlight, was a compass.

Her compass.

Choking back tears, she forced herself to walk towards the stairs and her cabin, aiming for privacy and soundproof walls so that nobody heard her cry. She didn't get that far, however, with Tamar shouting her name and jogging over. "You okay? You're crying. Who do I need to kill?"

"Nobody, sorry, I'll be fine. Just homesick I guess." Tamar nodded, concern still on her face, when Sturmhond joined them.

"Shit, what happened? Who do I hurt?" Y/n choked out a laugh at his words, both at the similarity between his and Tamar's, and at the irony of it.

"I'll be alright, just... carry on with your lives." She disappeared below deck, heading straight for her cabin. When she heard heavy footsteps behind her, she cursed, recognising them as the captain's.

"Y/n! Y/n! Wait- ow!" She had reached her door when she looked back at his cry of pain, seeing the man clutching his right shin.

"What did you do?"

"Walked into a box somebody had left lying around. Seriously, I'm more worried about you."

"It was a metal box," she said, eyeing the offending item. "You sure you shouldn't get your leg checked?"

"I've suffered worse. Got shot multiple times, heartbreak too, so this is nothing."

"Heartbreak?"

He looked at her for a long moment. Ah. So he does know who I am.

"Yeah. Broke my heart and the heart of the girl I love." Y/n's breath caught at his use of present tense, then she internally cursed herself for allowing the butterflies to start up.

"I think we need to talk in my room, Captain."

"If you say so," he replied, and given how the man had been acting the past few days, she was very surprised that he didn't say it with a smirk and a wink. Instead he seemed incredibly serious, although the fact that he was still clutching his shin put off the whole image slightly, and she offered him a cold pack when they were inside, door shut. He sat, taking it gratefully. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Why didn't you fight for me?"

The question clearly caught him off guard, and he sat staring dumbly at her for a few moments.

"Sorry?" His voice was barely more than a whisper, and if she hadn't taught herself, she would have had to strain her ears to hear him.

"I know who you are, Sturmhond, and I want to know why you didn't fight to be with me five years ago."

She turned to look at him, startled to see his hair even more blond than it had been in the sunlight.

Tailoring must be wearing off, she thought. Good, I'll get my Golden Boy back, some part of her belatedly added, but she pushed it to the back of her mind.

"You know who I am? Prove it."

"The compass. What's the inscription say?"

"Your heart takes you places but-"

"-your love brings you home."

He said the first part hoarsely, not breaking eye contact with her as she spoke the second half with him.

"I gave it to Nikolai, to you, the day you left me. My father had it engraved for my mother when we had a little extra cash and when he passed away, she gave it to me. I didn't go a day without it until you."

"I'd say you chucked it at my head, not gave it to me, but yes. And I haven't gone a day without it either. Not one." He stood, placing the cool pack to the side. "There has not been a single moment where I haven't thought of you, and how badly I left things between us. I was doing damage control because I thought it would hurt less in the end because I was scared. Scared of how much I loved you, and Saints," he laughed, "I'm still scared of it. I'm sorry that I hurt you, I truly am, and I know that I broke your trust and your heart. But I hope that you know that I am not like them, and I will never be like them, because I have spent my whole life with people like them and I am sick of it. I'm sick of pretending that I don't care about the people of Ravka just to please some nobles, because I do. They run the whole fucking machine. I'm sick of people treating others like the dirt under their shoes simply because they weren't born into privilege. I'm sick of all of it, which is why my crew is what it is. It's also why it hurts me so much to know that you think I'm like that, because I'm not. Not at all. And I am so sorry that I made you feel that way, and I will spend the rest of my days making it up to you just to even be considered for a second chance, because I still love you. I am ridiculously, hopelessly and completely in love with you, Y/n, and letting myself leave without you was the worst decision I have ever made. My life without you is merely an existence, and my world is all the more darker without you shining your light in it. You are my heaven, and you are my universe, and I love you with every fibre of my being every day."

He was in front of her now, having moved closer the whole time he'd been speaking. Tears were streaming down her cheeks at how genuine he'd been, and he gently wiped them away as they fell.

"Nik," Y/n sobbed, and she collapsed into him, crying into his chest. She had no idea how long they stayed like that, her crying and him holding her tight, one hand stroking her back and the other playing with her hair, chin resting on the top of her head, but after a while her sobs subsided, and she pulled away, hiccoughing every now and then.

"You'll be alright, darling, even if that means I'm not there to make sure of it." He was wiping her tears away again, not that there were any left, but the movement of his thumb on her cheek was so soft, and his expression was so kind and loving, she pushed up on her toes and kissed him. It was brief, only a second or two, but it made the butterflies flutter and her heart sing.

Then she smacked him.

"You ever, ever, do anything like that again, I will kill you, slowly and painfully, so that you feel every. Single. Inch of pain that I felt these last five years and whatever pain I feel in that moment, do you understand?" He nodded rapidly, bewildered look on his face.

"Absolutely. Does this mean I'm being considered for a second chance?"

"It means you're getting one, so don't screw it up, Lantsov."

"I won't. I promise you, I won't. I will not make that mistake again."

"Good." And she kissed him again, this time for longer, and more slowly, savouring every second. When she pulled away for the second time, he trailed after her, and she gasped at the sight in front of her.

He was him, he was her Golden Boy again.

"What? Did I become a terrible kisser? Is there something on my face? In my hair? What is it?"

"You might need your Tailor, Golden Boy. Your eyes are blue and your nose doesn't look fucked."

"Shit, really?" And when she nodded, he laughed, tipping his head back and letting the joyful sound out. "Feels fitting, I suppose. That I look like myself instead of someone I'm not. Almost symbolic, isn't it? I transform from a-"

"Shut up, Nik, and kiss me again."

"Oh, okay," and he did.

#grishaverse #netflix shadow and bone #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lanstov x reader #nikolai x reader #nikolai lanstov x y/n #nikolai x y/n

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