#I'm like essentially cis idk | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sleepyboywrites · 9 months

Note

Hey there, do you wanna do yandere headcannons for the creepypasta characters? (Specifically Trans or Cis Male Reader) whichever once you want, I did it with the TF2 characters and it was tons of fun

Hey! I hope it's okay if I just do an in general Male Reader because I don't like to use specifics unless it's necessary, like for trans/cis exclusive experiences ie: dysphoria/euphoria, overly descriptive nsfw if I ever end up doing something like that, and/or things like periods which cis men don't experience to allow more people to relate. In short I just don't want any male readers to feel excluded if it's not an exclusive experience if that makes any sense.

Also I apologize for not posting in a bit and taking so long to respond to this turns out I have too many thoughts about this particular prompt actually so this will probably turn into individual series/posts after this one

Yandere! Creepypasta x Male!Reader.

Tw: yandere behaviors kidnapping, murder, physical or psychological abuse, slightly spicy? for a couple Idk, it's nothing descriptive just mentions of a perverted mind and could possibly be interpreted in that way

Eyeless Jack

• obsession obsession obsession. Beastlike has things he stole from you in a nest. Kills people who interact with you. Almost wolf-like if I had to put a fine point to it.

• At first it's just people who were mean to you, hurt you, or made you feel badly about yourself because surely a boy like yourself would praise him for being so helpful to you, right?

• Then it's anyone who gets too close or appears to like you romantically.

• Then it's anyone you spend too much time with which interferes with time meant for him.

• He's delusional, but in the practical sense.

• Think, "I'm doing this to protect him" , "Those people would hurt him eventually", "He's not safe on his own, he needs me to look over him." "The outside world will tear him apart."

• Stalks you 24/7. You are never without eyes on you but you also don't have a clue he's watching at first.

• After all he only steals things you haven't worn in months or you could chock up to misplacing.

• And he's a hunter so he specializes in stalking whether for food or in personal matters.

• You won't know he's there until it's too late.

• He'll make his move to kidnap you once you've essentially isolated yourself out of fear to those around you dying. He'll treat you gently during his kidnapping.

• Using his medical knowledge he'd give you anesthesia as you sleep and take you home.

• May remove an organ or two as souvenirs, treats if you will to add to his nest.

• Once you are in his possession he will add you to his nest and you'll wake up pressed firmly into his chest as he mumbles incoherently.

•If you ever try to leave he will make you pliant in anyway he can think of. He's not above physically harming you if that makes it so you can't leave him. He worked so hard to retrieve his mate and he won't lose you even if he has to hurt you or you end up hating him but you will stay.

Ben Drowned

• A lot like EJ he's also always watching difference is you are always overly aware of his presence.

• He wants you to know that he's watching. He wants you to interact with him. Even if that interaction is you yelling at him and begging him to leave you alone.

• He is 100% playing some sort of sick game with you that he knows you'll lose. Think you'll develop Stockholm syndrome before he even kidnaps you.

• If he ever leaves you alone for a few days you'd find yourself missing the teasing remarks and add ons normally added as you went about your day.

• All due to his tendency to drive people insane of which you are not immune but the trail of your insanity leading directly to his arms.

• He knows this and is overly cocky about it both to your face and to others. Think, "oh poor you, you love me, what an unfortunate situation." To your face the first time you fall asleep around him with a stupid sick grin or "I'm going to kill you and he's going to come to me for comfort and protection when he finds out." when talking to someone he's deemed bad for you.

• He wouldn't go on a murder spree without a trigger but then like Jack that'll devolve into killing anyone he disapproves of which is everyone else.

• He has a general distaste and distrust of people due to the nature of his creation and will find an excuse to kill anyone around you should his murderous intent be triggered which can happen in three different ways you're constantly distraught by someone, you start ignoring him to be around someone else, or you've failed to keep him entertained so he needed a more entertaining situation.

• Possesive with a capital P, if he does not know your precise location or have you within arms reach at any given moment he will lose it.

• Clingy but veiled with indifference. He'll act as if he doesn't care but insist on keeping some kind of contact at all times. Once he physically has you this would be physical contact and before hand just following you everywhere saying he doesn't have anything better to do.

• Will use psychological and emotionally harmful methods to keep you in line if you ever try to reject him or his advances but claims won't hurt you physically in anyway.

• His vice grip on you reveals otherwise though. Enough so to encourage you to go along with him.

Laughing Jack

• I feel he'd court you in cat-like ways. If you've been in his box more extravagant shows with him as the lead, carrying you around places. (Being weary to let you leave until he eventually stops letting you leave.

•Leaving you gifts that go from sweet to scary really fast. Think your favorite treats and then your loved ones' hearts carved from their chests so you never have to leave him again.

• He's the king of being delulu and reacts poorly to ungratefulness so do try your best not to scream or hit him when instead of cotton candy he has a loved one's head on a stick.

• You can try to gently coerce him to stop killing your loved ones in order to isolate you and making you stay forever/to let you go. But he'll say "you're being silly" and "here is where you belong you goofball of a boy. " covered in your loved ones blood as he ruffles your hair.

•The accidentally kill you for being ungrateful/not accept him and keep your corpse like your still alive type.

•Keep it lighthearted and the Jester is your friend. If you don't and mention troubles he'll fix them violently.

• Is constantly coddling and cuddling you.

• Since he was once a guardian angel and he believes his murdering of ungrateful children is God's work, he sees you as a present for all his good work.

• Like a child being gifted a puppy on Christmas.

• Bone crushing hugs and grips that bruise your skin and make it so it hurts to move but he acts like he didn't mean to and gets moody if you push him away or say he's hurting you.

• It's an act though, he likes seeing you squirm in pain and the expressions you make trying not to cry when he holds you.

• He thinks it's cute. He thinks you're cute when you're in pain.

• On a lighter note, he 100% is the type of clingy to hold your sleeve going places or to poke you (mostly) lightly in order to get your attention.

Homicidal Liu

•The softest in this lineup.

• I believe the term is dormant Yandere? Yeah. It is, because you wouldn't guess something is off until something starts getting between the two of you.

• You remind him of before his traumas, whether that be you look like someone who was kind to him before or upon first meeting you were genuine, honest, and kind. You make him feel safe and calm or as calm as Sully gets and he's never letting you leave him.

• He'd incorporate himself into your life truly getting close to you. Like this is months if not years long in the making. He becomes the closest person to you in your inner circle and you're the same for him. He plays the long game.

• You guys live together and you probably already like him the same way he likes you but both of you are too awkward to talk about it and Sully has been forbidden to say anything or Liu threatened to take his meds. Or you guys are in a long-term committed relationship already.

• Protective, possessive, and obsessive but fairly level headed. He is aware of the reality of the situation. Ie: his possessiveness is giving you his clothes and repetitive thoughts of "mine" during times of physical contact or seeing you in his clothes and needing texts or where you are, why you left, and when you plan on being back as well as if anything changes. He obsesses over your likes, dislikes, mannerisms, emotional cues, and interests so he essentially knows you even better than you do. Protective being watching over you as you sleep in situations where it's acceptable to do so and setting up security systems for the house.

•More likely to grab your arm or hug your knees and sob "please don't leave me" than he is to ever hurt you. The most agressive he gets is when Sully is fronting but even then the likelihood of him hurting you above holding you a bit too tight is 5% and reserved for extremely specific occasions which virtually don't happen. Ie: you find out he's a murderer and react too poorly in a way he didn't expect, you leave him cold turkey, you treat him poorly

• Clingy always needs some kind of contact most of the time this equates to holding hands/pinkies in public and ensuring the two of you are essentially attached at the hip. Though because he's entered your inner circle you just think it's because you two are close and that's the product of your closeness.

• His hunting turns into stalking and killing those who've been bugging you and you've talked poorly about whenever he feels his bloodlust bubbling over.

•'Cause if he kills people you've said that you wished would die or that you hate you'll be able to forgive or even praise him right?

• Unlikely to kidnap you unless he gets caught/found out then he'll probably relocate the two of you but he'd rather talk to you about it beforehand so it'd be a last minute emergency type thing. Or if you spend too much time away from him.

Jeff the Killer

• Doesn't play games of any kind. He'll observe you just long enough to learn about you, your schedule, who all knows you, and how frequently they check in. Then he'll remove obstacles and he'll just just take you.

• Impatient and the shortest fuse known to man.

• He's not afraid to hurt you in fact he enjoys it so the more perverted side of him wants you to push him and his expectations.

• The chain you up in a basement type

•He'll kill anyone involved with your life so when you beg him to let you go with tears in your eyes saying you have people waiting for you he can tell you with certainty that you don't. Not anymore. Laughing as he tells you and stroking/tugging at your hair.

• Degrading and mean to the point where you can't tell if he hates you or not. Uses pet names in a derogatory way as well.

• Pretty distant and cold even after you warm up to him and he lets you wander around a contained and highly surveillanced area, though it's probably just the torture basement he chained you up in to begin with.

•Most affection you'd get is a pat on the head or shoulder.

•Any other form of affection wouldn't really feel like affection.

•Wants to break you into a mindless doll essentially for him to love, use, and abuse. But the breaking you into it is very important to him.

• Will torture you severely for any mishap.

•The only way you can tell he's attracted to you beyond physically, is if he goes too far with the torture, when he's patching you up, or when he brings you something you like/he likes.

•Though he talks to you sweetly sometimes after you pass out and/or are slipping into unconsciousness. "You were made for me, sweet boy." "So good for me." It wigs you out though.

•you will feel like you live on eggshells as try your best to accommodate to him.

• you are most likely to go insane and learn to crave his mistreatment.

Ticci-Toby

• Delusional. He is convinced you and him are in love and have the white picket fence dream. Complete with a German Shepherd and two adopted kids.

• And because of the way his brain is scrambled once he starts thinking about you regularly he can no longer tell what really happened or what was a daydream.

• Hopefully he has a good enough grip on reality to have actually interacted with you before his delusions convince him that you need to be with him at all times and he kidnaps you.

• 'Cause if not he's going to be really confused as to why his boyfriend who told him this is what he wanted is freaking out to the point of needing restrained. You'll hurt his feelings and he'll probably successfully gaslight you into believing his delusions himself.

• Also the lock you up type but more in the paranoid of others stealing you from him way, so if it's not together you aren't going.

• Like Jeff he allows you to roam around a highly surveillanced and locked up area but unlike Jeff it's an actual house and not a basement.

• He will hole up with you for weeks until duty calls or the house runs out of supplies

• Very "I love him I love him I love him I love him" coded and needs you to be just as enthusiastic.

•The hurt you on accident and profusely apologize immediately after but loves how you look when you cry and tremble as he patches you up type.

• Think someone telling him something that insinuated his affections towards you didn't count so he grabs your arm and squeezes it as you try walking away, asking "Toby... you're hurting me." He says wide-eyed struggling for only a moment as his kidnapper/partner tightens his grip with steel cold eyes. "Tell me it counts. It counted right?" (may or may not be my first ex-core as in my experience based)

•He feels really guilty about it too and periodically he will be crying into your lap forcing you to comfort him after an outburst because he feels just like his dad and he hates it.

Tim/Masky

• Much like Homicidal Liu and Hoodie he is actively incorporating you into his life. Difference is he's trying to manipulate you into thinking he's the only one you can trust.

• Uses the White Knight Method, which in case you're unfamiliar is a highly efficient manipulation technique in which they solve your problems while unbeknownst to you being the source of said problems until you become obsessed with or fall in love with the "knight" protecting you.

• If you feel like someone is watching you, he's toying with you. In fact he'll probably show up shortly after from the opposite direction of where you think watching is coming from and ask you if you're okay. Revelling in the look of fear on your face as you gush to him about what's bothering you and promising to protect you as he walks you home.

•He'll sabotage your relationships by making you think that they're the ones who've been leaving disturbing gifts on your doorstep/trying to hurt you.

• It's very much so a game to him and you're the prize.

• He's the type to want to see every emotion you have to offer.

• He's also the likes when you smile and likes when you cry more type

• But his need for you to need him and seek him out basically nukes the previous headcannon and makes it so he settles for comforting you when as far as you know something/someone else made you cry.

•Essentially by the time he's done with you, you'd beg to never leave his side, for him to keep you close and keep you safe but you don't have to because that's right where he wants you.

Brian/Hoodie

• Stalker alert! He's watching you sleep and following you everywhere

•Also uses the White Knight method but he uses what would have been a one time scary occurrence and uses that occurrence as a scapegoat to make more situations/scenarios which isolate you and bring you closer to him.

• In fact, his protection is a gateway to you, his foot in the door.

•It starts with him stepping in when things get scary then you see him somewhere you frequent and you talk to him or he talks to you and numbers are exchanged.

• After of which you are his clearly. Obviously, you just don't know it yet.

• Then he starts staging more scary, making your loved ones hurt you/turn on you/are the culprit in a scary situation until he's all you have. Until you need him.

• Mans has hidden cameras all over your house.

•You know where most of them are after all it was his idea, he said it was for your protection. What you didn't account for is all the hidden cameras in the gifts he's got you.

• He's the quiet, doting, infantilizing type.

• As in he genuinely believes you are too small, weak, and pure to know any of his intentions and he treats you as if you have no clue about anything always. Babies you constantly at a gradually increasing weight until it's suffocating.

• He wants to lock you up and protect you.

• Gaslighting king, if you catch on or try to leave him he will gaslight you into staying.

• Think "Baby boy what are you even talking about everything I've done was for your protection and your protection alone. There's no secret cameras you don't know about you're being silly." Or "Sweet boy, I've never done anything you didn't want or need. I'm very intuned to your needs and you need me. You need to be protected, you aren't safe unless I'm near."

• So genuinely and heartfeltly said that you'd clearly be the bad guy for even thinking like that and with how deep he has you you'd believe him too.

#ben drowned #brian hoodie #eyeless jack #homicidal liu #jeff the killer #laughing jack #ticci toby #tim masky #creepypasta x male reader #these are all in general headcannons but i do believe there's a best case scenario for each should you guys be interested :)#yandere creepypasta x male reader #as always #suggestions are welcome #also definitely goinng to write about these characters individually in the near future

188 notes · View notes

cainsign · 4 months

Text

it feels craaazy transitioning in an exclusively male workplace. even the guys who are okay with me transitioning and even see me as male (or male-lite) are constantly like This Is What Men Do, you must do this now that you are a man. it does feel kind of affirming because they see me as one of the guys! but it's also like. yeah we have to talk about your sex life and objectify women now that you're on t. what do you mean you don't want to do that. idk it just serves as a reminder to me that being ftm DOES afford you with male privilege & you're often pushed to conform and participate in misogyny to affirm your identity "as a man." if anything, you're encouraged to participate more, because you have to prove your masculinity to your peers if you want to be accepted.

most of all, it proves to me that so-called transandrophobia is absolutely bullshit. there is nothing unique about the way i'm being pushed to socialize with my male peers as i transition, the only difference is that i'm being pushed into it later in life than a cis man would have been. my male coworkers, who probably consider themselves my allies, are trying to teach me how best to punch down at women and other minorities as proof of my masculinity. i can't speak to a transfeminine experience, but i assume that a part of the social aspect of transition is the exact inverse of this. but for me, i'm essentially able to move past the oppressive system of misogyny, as long as i agree to benefit from it.

#btw i am bigender... i don't fully identify as a man but i'm on t and want to be seen as a man #but even so i'm benefitting from masculinity.#idk i just wanted to articulate this because the transandrophobia stuff really bothers me #i don't necessarily want to argue with people. you can disagree please do so respectfully.

61 notes · View notes

enby-iggy · 8 months

Text

Im going to try and explain my gender to the 0 people who are paying attention to this blog, because I deserve to ramble a little bit I think

For context I'm afab. I've pretty much always known I wasn't a man, which is a big part of why it took me so long to question my gender at all. I specifically remember seeing the term transmasc online when I was first discovering queer terms and being like "hmm I wonder if that could be me" and then looking it up and seeing it listed as a synonym for trans man and just being like "oh ok then guess im still cis". I didn't start seriously questioning until like. April of this year I think

I don't know why it took me so long to consider the idea of being nonbinary, but it was actually a conversation with some of my trans friends that made me consider it. I remember saying something like "I may be cis but I'd trade my female body for a completely neutral one in a heartbeat" and one of my friends was like "r u sure ur cis lmao". Silly stuff. My whole thing was like, I want a body that looks like nothing, that I can make look like anything. If I want to wear mens' clothes I don't want boobs that get in the way of that. But I want to be able to wear a dress and not have like, idk body hair and a dick getting in the way of that. And I said stuff to my friends like, I don't rly want hormones but Id wear a binder to look more neutral, Id voice train and get my voice deeper, that makes sense right

My biggest hangup was on pronouns, because I was REALLY proud of being a she/her. But I decided, hey I can't knock they/them until I try it right? So I proposed a they/them test for a week, and never looked back lmao. I went through a phase of absolutely despising she/her for a month or two, but I've since made up with the pronoun set as you can see in my bio. She/her and I are good friends now we've settled our differences <3

Putting the rest under a cut for the sake of my 2 followers' TLs not being flooded because I still have much to say

My gender is very multifaceted, but in the physical realm you could call me transmasc. It took me a while to realize but I hate my boobs (or rather, took me a while to realize that disliking your boobs is not normal lmfao), to the point where I very quickly went from "eh I might get a binder for some outfits" to "I NEED to get top surgery". I'm also not a fan of my hips and ass, never have been but I don't think there's much I can do about that one. I also have solid evidence for vocal dysphoria, in that I can remember a specific time as a kid where I learned that your voice sounds deeper to you than it does to other people because of the way you hear it through your skull. This disappointed me GREATLY because I always prided myself on the idea that I had a boyish voice. I do think I'd like to train my voice lower, if possible. Lastly for physical dysphoria I've always had a thing about my height, but I mostly learned to ignore it since boys LOVE to make fun of girls (and other boys I suppose) for their height. I learned to shut it out and make fun of myself as well as a coping mechanism, because it really did and always has bugged me. But what can I do, I've 5 foot even at 19 years old and it doesn't seem to be changing any time soon.

As for my internal experience of gender...I think this low-quality ms paint chart will explain it best.

Basically my gender exists on two simultaneous sliding scales--one of them a distinctly gendered outside-of-binary gender that I'm choosing to call neutrois, because it's an existing term that works for what I'm talking about. The other gender is a female-aligned gender that is distinct from cisgender femininity but is still feminine in nature, which I am choosing to call femme because I hate the words woman and girl and female in relation to my own gender. I can experience both of these scales at maximum intensity--bigendered as both neutrois and femme at the same time--or minimum intensity--essentially agendered, no distinct experience of gender either way--OR I can be some strange combination of these, such as minimum femme and maximum neutrois or half neutrois and full femme, etc. I've found that the strength of ANY gender fluctuates over longer periods of time, in that I tend to feel low amounts of gender for a period of about two weeks, followed by higher feelings of gender for about two weeks, during which the relation of femme to neutrois fluctuates on a daily basis.

As for labels, the best way I can think to describe this is bigenderflux, and also demigirl (or demifemme, as I prefer to call it). But for obvious reasons I usually just call myself nonbinary. I also like terms like librafemme, describing the property of being both agender and feminine, and juxera, describing the property of being feminine aligned in a way that is different from the way cis women are feminine. But it's...hard to label.

The funny thing about this is that it doesn't really line up with my gender expression much at all. There are days that I'm feeling fully agender or fully neutrois, and am strangely in the mood to wear a dress. Or days that I'm feeling mostly femme and want to present like a boy. So realistically my gender doesn't really have any bearing on anything at all. But I like charting it, because a few months ago if I'd woken up feeling feminine I would have spiraled into a panic about how I must be faking being trans. But this allows me to understand myself and predict how I'll feel so I know that when I feel a certain way, that's normal and part of who I am.

I feel like I had more to say in this post but I guess this is purely a gender summary. Now you know I guess

76 notes · View notes

endreal · 3 months

Note

Ayyy a fellow dual E & T hrt user! How do you like your set up and do you wanna share what got you there?

Privacy is important please don't feel compled to provide personal information

Sure! I guess in some ways I'm surprised I don't get more questions about this.

I first realised I was Not Cis in...actually probably 2004 but I didn't have language to describe it at the time - all I knew was that David Bowie Pissed Me Off for incomprehensible reasons that had nothing to do with his personality or his music. I just Could Not Look At That Guy without feeling Extremely Complicated Feelings.

Anyway, a lot happened in the end of that decade and I started my first binary transition in the '10s. It actually went pretty stellar, all in all. It's just that...after 3-4 years I realized I wasn't any happier about myself than I was beforehand. It didn't "fit" right, y'know? Anyway after a lot of internal turmoil and some blessed insightful words from @kipplekipple I finally accepted that hey, maybe this whole binary thing isn't for me and I'm agender. Or possibly bigender. Idk. Even more Not Cis than initially assumed.

Anyhow, from there I kicked off some scary-to-me conversations with my Dr. (who, to her credit, was impressively supportive) and got the second course added to my hrt regimen. And after about 2-2.5 years of periodic adjustments and calibrations to my hormones and blood tests (which I've become quite good at sitting the draws, if I do say so myself!), my levels have basically stabilised, which has been great in almost all ways... even tho it does mean that I now experience period-like cycle every 3ish weeks preceding injections. 🤦🏼

A lot of this happened...not exactly under the radar, but I also didn't beat drums and yell about it from the mountaintops. A big part of this is because I had other life shit going on and a still-ongoing global pandemic swept thru everything in a major way, but I also have to acknowledge that part of it is because I had always been fairly open about being queer and trans, and I was afraid (yes, afraid) that my story might get picked up by bad-faith actors as a detransition narrative when in fact it was anything but that. So this is probably the first time I've said all the pieces of this all together and "out loud" even tho I've made plenty of passing mentions about different parts of it over time. So thanks for asking directly!

PS. for what it's worth, I later realised that my Complicated Bowie Feelings were essentially jealousy. I've accepted by now that I'll never be a vaguely luminous avatar of human androgyny (sorry David Bowie. sorry Grace Jones and Annie Lennox. sorry Link Legendofzelda.)... but I still give it my best try, in the ways that I can. :)

#Endreal in real life #agender

21 notes · View notes

sunaria-bees · 6 months

Text

Undertale/deltarune head canons because I'm keeping all my fandom shit here and I'm bored as hell

One off fact: Undertale and Deltarune bot take place in Minnesota, why? Because I said so

Undertale facts

1: frisk is infact not an orphan, but just a really kid who was on a hike with their parents and got sidetracked

2: frisk does eventually reunite with their parents while living with toriel, toriel (and maybe ashore idk) become frisk godparent(s)

3: Chara spirit is especially spiritually bonded with frisk, whatever pain frisk experience, Chara does as well, however dulled considering their a ghost,

4: frisk has done only the neutral and pacifist runs in my main au, they were going to do genocide but bailed out after killing papyrus from guilt

5: the "player" is just frisk intrusive thoughts, the curiosity in them essentially

6: sans is slightly more aware than others about timelines and shit but he can't tell when one happens, he just gets that same feeling of deja Vu if that makes sense

7: Sans is aroace (he's too lazy for love) Papyrus is pan, alphas and undyne are lesbians, toriel and asgore are both cis and straight allies, and frisk is agender non-binary

Deltarune facts

1: Kris is selectively mute, they only talk to people their close with (toriel, asgore, Asriel, etc..)

2: Susie is infact poor but she does have parents, they're just at their jobs a lot

3: Ralsei has abandonment issues due to the fact that he was alone for so long, he likes having people around him

4: Asriel is a English major, mostly because he has a very vivid imagination!

5: I ship Kris x berdly buts it's very much one sided (guess which side it is!!!!)

6: Kris is non binary and asexual, Susie is bisexual, Noelle is lesbian, berdly is gay (in very much fucking denial), ralsei is trans masc and gay

7: spamton and jevil are ex boyfriends<33333

#deltarune #headcanons #headcanon #undertale #au #i love tohy fox<333 #its 4:30 im not sleeping

26 notes · View notes

xxlovelynovaxx · 5 days

Text

Good job deceptively burying most of the panels under a cut.

Yes, it's a bullshit question, but not because a fear of 50 percent of the population is somehow rational. Not because I highly doubt that this person would actually respect a man's distrust of them. Not just because it's assuming that it's a man asking, and not say, a trans person who has been deeply harmed by gender essentialism and especially the positioning of (cis) women as the passive victim gender and (usually all) men (or at least all those recognized as "real" men, with cis manhood the standard they're being compared to as the active perpetrator and aggressor gender.

Would I rather be alone in the woods with a human or a deadly animal that will kill me if I get too near its cubs, its food, if it's hungry enough, if its territorial, if its mating season, because I startled it, or for any other number of reasons.

Idk, I'd trust the vast majority of men over a mindless animal with giant knives on every single one of its toes and in its mouth and that's multiple times my size and weight.

I happen to recognize that most men aren't in fact murderers, and that in fact in cases where men are violent it's almost never a stranger, but someone the victim knows well (and in fact that men are more often the victims of violent men than women are!).

I happen to know that in fact this widespread fear of men actually serves the patriarchy, and specifically white supremacy, because it positions (white) women as valuable (white baby producing) objects needing protection (from men, via ownership), from all other men but especially nonwhite men (because their nonwhite genes pose a direct threat to maintaining a steady production of white babies)..

Even if you replace men protecting women via ownership with women protecting women, well, then you just get radic/al feminism. Which, even when supposedly "trans-inclusive" is typically extremely violent towards nonbinary people, transmascs, non-transitioning and masculine-presenting transfems (such as butch transfems), intersex trans people; and it either ignores or actively erases and covers up the actions of women who perpetrate violence and abuse against other women while often harming men (and those perceived as men) who have not so much as been a threat, let alone violent. This is especially true of trans men, who are often treated as having power over all women by cis women who have significant power over them, and men of color, who are treated as threat to white women who hold life-and-death power over them.

I know I interact with men while recognizing their personhood daily, and the vast majority of them I would completely trust in a survival situation where we're more concerned with staying alive than anything else, but even in a more casual situation.

I also know that even if we're specifically talking threat of sexual violence, the way so many people are like "the worst that can happen with the bear is my death, at least the bear won't rape me" is abhorrent. As a CSA survivor, hearing "you'd have been better off if you died", because that's what that message is no matter the intent, is horrific. Rape is survivable, and you can heal from it, even while it is horrific and traumatizing. Trauma can be healed from. Death, by definition, is neither survivable, nor can it be healed.

Like, someone in the comments was like "yeah, there's nuance!"

No, there's not, actually.

I wouldn't want to be in the woods with a known or suspected rapist or murderer, but that's true regardless of gender. I'm in more danger from any human over being visibly genderqueer than over being potentially perceived as female by a man, and I'd still choose the man. Heck, in a survival situation specifically my disabilities make me a potential target, and I'd still choose the man.

Having grown up camping regularly in grizzly and even cougar territory, I'd choose the man, because I actually have a realistic idea of how potentially dangerous a predator animal is when you're blundering around in its home turf for extended periods. Especially if you don't have proper equipment or training, which I doubt the people answering "bear" do - it makes me wonder if there's a correlation between people's answers to this and their answers to what they think is the most dangerous animal they could fight. Like, some of y'all think you could take a badger, let alone a bear, easily.

I'd choose a man, cis or trans, regardless of whether or not he was disabled, neurodivergent, queer, a man of color, otherwise marginalized, or not, over a bear. And given that some people were like "at least people won't blame me if I get attacked by a bear" - 1. If it's not a polar bear there IS a chance that it's at least partially your fault, because as much as I recognize how dangerous bears are I also know ways of minimizing the danger; and 2. I'd take a man over a woman because less people would believe me if a woman assaulted or raped me, and might even label me the aggressor as a trans person.

In fact, I'll choose a man over a woman who chooses bear every time, because those women almost always believe themselves to be categorically incapable of doing the level of harm they are afraid of being done to them, and anyone who refuses to recognize their own capacity for harm (especially with physical and sexual violence) is an actively dangerous person.

I'll choose a man even knowing how to have the highest chance or survival in subpolar bear species' territories, even knowing what to do to have the best chances in direct encounters with bears, because the man and I might actually be able to help each other, and at least I have a chance of being able to predict whether or not he's trustworthy.

And all this aside, because I'm petty, Twilight Sparkle would not spout proto-ter/f ideology and rancid gender essentialism. I promise, "men inherently dangerous women inherently safe" will neither protect nor liberate women, and it in fact upholds patriarchal gender standards and is not harmless to ANY gender itself!

7 notes · View notes

dotster001 · 2 months

Note

Hi, dot!

You mentioned "queer platonic relationships." Legitimate question (and I really hope I'm not being insensitive by asking; I genuinely don't understand and wish to): is that not just a friendship? Or is it more just specifying the fact that it's friendships with non-cis and/or non-hetero people?

It can be just a friendship? The way I view it, is a friend who you do stuff that would be reserved for a romantic relationship usually. Almost friendship, but more, and maybe your friends and family always assume you guys have a crush on each other.

Or like, a bonded pair of animals. You separate them, and they die of the big sads.

My dream qpr, is that we live together, we raise our adopted kids together, we take care of each other when we are sick, we're emotional support for one another, we go everywhere together... Someone who we both know each other better than anyone else in the world knows us. We play house together... Basically, my dream qpr member is essentially a romantic partner...but without the romantic part.

Idk if that made sense, it's kind of a tricky concept. As someone without romantic emotions, I see the vision, but I get how not everyone would...😅 And, like everything that the aro aces like, it's a spectrum, so different people would like different things in their qpr

Idk, if other people wanna sound off in the comments or in reblogs that might help 😂

Tbh, I think anyone can have a QPR. We all knew those kids at school who were childhood friends, and inseparable, and they still are to this day, and you'd almost think they could date, but you know they don't feel that way about eachother...I think that's also a QPR, just without a label?

#just some thoughts #ask me stuff #aces like dragons

11 notes · View notes

tyrannuspitch · 3 months

Text

as a trans gay guy, my relationship to the concept of the butch/transmasc overlap is so so weird. because on one level it's by and large a real social phenomenon that underlies a lot of common experiences and draws communities together and so on. but then on another level. like. some of us (transmascs) just Are Not Butch. i recently read fun home, and i was really struck by bechdel's account of butchness and how it... didn't actually resonate with me at all. like, i'm very familiar with feeling uncomfortable with conventional femininity, and with wanting to look male - but i keep re-realising that the experience of specifically aspiring to masculinity is just alien to me. in particular, bechdel describes feeling like she might have been compensating for her dad's femininity, and like... i've never felt anything like that. i've tried to put distance between myself and women's femininity, but i've only ever looked at fem men and felt jealous of them.

but then i look at the cis gay male community for examples of male femininity, and of course, it has its own gnc/trans overlap. and i don't aspire to trans womanhood any more than i aspire to cis womanhood.

so for people on those two cusps, gender and orientation might be very fluid and open-ended, but my personal desired gender expression is actually quite narrow and a very delicate balance - narrower and more specific even than a lot of other fem gay trans guys i've encountered.

what's more, i've heard from a lot of people on the transmasc/butch cusp in particular that, essentially, they know they're queer because they're attracted to women, and the rest is hazier, but maybe also less important. which is an interesting perspective, but again - completely alien to me. gender comes first for me, without a doubt - and even that can be subdivided. orientation comes after gender, but a positive sense of maleness also comes after a completely fundamental sense of non-femaleness. gender and sexuality are entangled for both of us - but once again, in opposite ways.

i conceive of myself as a binary man, but even so, it's like... almost a nonbinary experience, in a way. like, in very old-fashioned views of queerness, there are two basic types of queer - the butch-lesbian-transhet-man group and the fem-gay-transhet-woman group. there are male inverts and female inverts, FtMs and MtFs, or in polari, omee-palones and palone-omees (men-women and women-men). and someone like me just... doesn't fit into that framework. if an invert is a man with a woman's soul or a woman with a man's soul, what is a woman with the soul of a man with the soul of a woman? you need more layers. you need to recognise that gender and orientation are, or at least can be, separable experiences to be able to conceive of me at all. and ironically that often means you have to frame orientation almost like a gender, again - i believe lou sullivan referred to himself as female-to-gay-male, and i can see why.

but at the same time - we've allegedly come so far, and people can now nominally conceive of identities like mine - but it's still a huge struggle to even begin to express it. how do you reconcile rejection of cisfemininity and womanhood with a genuine desire to be subtly feminine/effeminate? i haven't found a way yet. i don't know if it will be possible until i can access medical transition (and even then, it might take years.) so in the meantime, i look butch, and i just have to live with the fact that the identity i'm broadcasting is the direct opposite of who i really want to be.

idk man. i'm a trans man, but maybe i'm transandrogynous. but it has to be the right androgyny, an androgyny i feel is "male", so maybe i'm not! i'm a faggot trapped in a dyke's body. i'm transitioning from one queer gender expression to another, and while i do feel a degree of solidarity and commonality with actual butches, i also feel like butchness is, for me, nearly as suffocating and dissonant as cisfemininity.

and reading this back now, i've realised i'm doing the same thing over again - i'm conflating my own gayness with my own desire for androgyny(?)/effeminacy(?), and somewhere out there, a fem transhet guy or a butch transhet girl is groaning with exactly the same kind of alienation i often feel.

god. gender is so complicated and so important and so stupid at the same time. why does it have to be so hard!!! we all just want to exist.

#don't know if i have a tag for gender musings.#dk if this makes sense either but i'm done with it now so goodbye

10 notes · View notes

lazywitchling · 8 months

Text

Review: The House Witch by Arin Murphy-Hiscock

3.5/10 - This could have been a zine. As it stands, I was not the target audience for this book.

Maybe I'm just being mean since I read this one directly after Queering Your Craft, but my goodness I don't think I was the target audience for this one. I am cis-adjacent girl-not-woman, single, living at home with my highly conservative christian parents, and keep my craft in the closet. This book is for a cis-woman who is probably married, runs a household, has a couple of children, and is the spiritual-head-of-household who teaches the kids to say their prayers to the abstract Divine every night before they turn on their essential oil humidifier for bedtime.

It sure would be lovely to live in the world that Arin does, where I could consult with the other family members about their particular Spiritual Beliefs (TM) and integrate those into an Altar in the kitchen where we all make our offerings and say our prayers to the household spirits, but that is not the world I live in. If I tried to start that conversation at home, I'd very quickly wind up with a very aggressive visit from the local pastor who spoke at a rally for 45. Thanks, Arin, but I'm... gonna skip the build-an-altar-in-your-kitchen-and-invite-your-family-to-participate step.

So here's the thing. (And I'm starting to notice that this is a pattern with a lot of the witch books I read...) I would probably have loved this book if it were more of a personal memoir than a How To Witch 101 guide. And I get the feeling that this was more of a problem with publishing than with the author. I mean I could practically feel Arin bursting at the book-seams to tell me about how she practices her witchcraft spirituality in her home, but instead she's stuck trying to write about Hearthcraft (TM) as if it's a universal thing, since that's what's easiest to sell. The whole book feels like it's formatted and marketed to be a Witchcraft 101 book, but it doesn't do it well at all. In fact, in the beginning of the book, Arin practically scolds the reader by saying 'this is a spiritual path, not a magic one, and if you want a magic one, go get a book about magic.' Like... Arin, honey, your book is called The House Witch. I thought I was reading a book about witchcraft.

Furthermore, it feels like this book is filled up with a whole lot of pillow fluff to fill in the gaps. Did we need a whole chapter of cauldron mythology that we never ended up tying into anything else in the book? Did we need that? It seems like there's a lot of stuff in this book that was just put in for a page count; something to make the book seem like it has the wide-appeal of a Witchcraft 101 book. But it just came across as... idk, not genuine.

I just keep coming back to how much I would have loved to hear about Arin's own personal practice that she's so clearly passionate about!

Hey, but also... this book was an organizational mess. Why was the cookie recipe in the chapter with the cauldron lore instead of in the recipe chapter? Why were the instructions on making a clay figure of a household spirit in the chapter with the imaginary altar instead of in with the chapter on household spirits, or the chapter on crafts? Why was there a section on ethics sandwiched in between a section about talking to a tree spirit and a section about talking to a blender spirit, instead of in with the cooking chapter when we actually referenced ethics?

-sigh-

Look, while there wasn't really anything in this book that made me go "Oh wow that's a great idea, I need to use that!" there were a few sections that made me say "Hey, that particular thing is not of use to me, but the idea behind it absolutely is, and I should look into that." Which, once again, comes back to how much I wish this book was a personal memoir. Finding the little nuggets of information that told me what Arin does and how and why were so much more useful than the vague-and-generic step-by-step instructions of... whatever the instructions were for.

BTW, I read through this whole book, and I still am not sure of the definition of "spiritual" nor of "hearth" that we were using. I never did figure out if "hearth" meant "fireplace" or "center of the home" or "kitchen" or what.

Ultimately I came out of the book more confused than I was going in. It's not the worst witch book I've read -- [waves to Skye Alexander] -- and I did get at least some things out of it that I can ponder on my own. But man... idk what that book was for. I'm tired. I'm going to bed.

#jes vs witch books #navigation: reviews

25 notes · View notes

marvelfilth · 5 months

Note

Since you and your followers want an answer so badly but can't be bothered to actually look up stuff yourself, here you go:

From a trans person btw. And I've mentioned several times how I've seen it in these communities, communities I'm a part of lol, and even have a trans friend that doesn't like it so it's funny that you all just keep going on about it being cis people when it's not lol.

Idk how you're getting just use "girl with a penis" from what I'm saying when that's the exact same thing as using GP. I'm saying to specify when reader or charter has one by saying "x, has a penis". It's like you're purposely being obtuse about all of this because you don't want to change what you're doing.

I'm not being obtuse (funny how the second you're hit with questions you start calling people obtuse), I'm just not actively looking for hate where there's obviously none, and asking questions because (surprise!) I'm not about to change what I'm doing just because some noname on Tumblr told me to. I expected you to say something factual, but, so far, you've only said that some people don't like it and then jumped straight to it being harmful. Are you the obtuse one?

“Don't say girl with a penis, say character x (in this case Natasha) has a penis”

So if Natasha Romanoff has a dick in a fic I'm not allowed to call her a girl? Is that what you're trying to say? Is that what the issue is? And how is that even an issue? What are you even trying to say?

“Cissexist language and framing”?

Please, please tell me where in my fics have I ever used cissexist language and framing.

“Why does the tag g!p even exist when it essentially casts women with vaginas as default, inherently othering an already marginalized group of women…”

Because when you're reading a wlw fic and then get to the smut part and suddenly one of the women has a dick you'd be a little surprised. The majority of women have a vagina, so it's natural to expect that women in a fic would have one too.

Some people don't like being surprised like this, that's why we put a warning.

“Why does the combination of these two always frame trans/intersex women as not being as 'real' as cis women (generally implicitly, but the messages are pretty clear, and pretty much standard in g!p fics)?”

Again, I don't know what kind of fics you read and what kind of blogs you follow, but I've never even hinted at this in any of my fics.

Look, if i used the tag for a trans character (for example Natasha transitioning f to m or m to f) and put the tag gp THAT would've been harmful. I would've never used the tag in this case, because I understand how wrong it is in this case.

But my fics are not the case.

What I get from this is that some people simply don't like the wording. There's a number of very simple solutions. You can idk scroll? Block? The possibilities are endless.

#ask #mostlymarvelsstuff

14 notes · View notes

nightcolorz · 4 months

Note

I'm so sorry I don't mean to be rude or coming for you or anything but can I ask a question? Didn't you have a post about gender recently and you said the amc iwtv show was about gay MEN? So why are you tagging Louis art with female terms? Again, I'm so sorry, I just don't understand and I think I'm probably missing something. I'm trying to learn more about gender things but it's very confusing for me. Thank you for your time 💚

dont apologize anon ur not being rude! I'm not rlly sure how to explain this, I'm gonna try my best 😭 so sorry if this is only more confusing. At least the way I see it, AMC iwtv and the tvc books handle gender very differently. Tvc vampires r described as not rlly having genders bcus of there vampirism and lack of alignment with humanity and mortal concepts of the gender binary. The way Anne rice saw it was since their genitals no longer work they r no longer male or female and so since they r so disconnected from the societal expectations around gender along with this bcus of how gender roles r always changing and vampires r outside of time, they r essentially gender neutral. The amc show (at least of now) doesn't seem to be going this route, although it does play around with gender norms and stuff, the vampires do seem to be cis men essentially (obvs ppl can have there head cannons and my read doesn't invalidate any trans reads of AMC iwtv that exist). But since they do just have cis normative sex with each other, vampirism doesn't rlly change there sexualities or gender expression, and they do identify and present gender the way gay men would, I don't see the amc vamps as particularly gender less the way the tvc vamps r. I made a post about this B4 that summarizes my thoughts much better then this or the post ur referring to (which was kinda crap which is why I deleted it 😭).

But anyways, I call Louis she/her pronouns on art (specifically Kate @loelett art love u babe) bcus Kate and I rlly like this aspect of the books, and since we talk about the gender fluidity in tvc a lot we've started using she he and they pronouns interchangeably for the vamps (mostly Louis cus Louis is Kate's fav character so we talk about him the most lol). When I call Louis she/her pronouns or feminine terms it's not cuz I see him as a woman or perceive him as particularly feminine, it's more cuz I see him as genderless so using any pronouns for him is natural to me. I usually call Louis she her when I'm especially excited about him 😭 idk maybe bcus of the cultural association with she/her + feminity and softness/loveliness and affection (like the way u call a boat she/her y'know? Or a beloved car), or maybe bcus most of my close loved ones r women so using she her is natural when it comes to compliments and affectionate terms for me. Anyways I hope this makes sense or clears things up, tbh I am very surprised that ppl I'm not friends with even perceive my blog at all sometimes so I never considered how I may have been confusing ppl 😭

#Tvc #Asks

9 notes · View notes

reginageourge · 1 year

Note

https://www.tumblr.com/reginageourge/716497030605881344/who-are-the-worse-fauxbians-youve-encountered?source=share

May i ask why?

oh god ... so the whole story is long and weird so idk if I'm doing it justice by condensing it down into a few short sentences, but basically, me and another one of the gs server girlies accidentally doxxed goldstarsappho (she'd gone awol for almost a year, we wondered what the hell happened to her so we snooped around on her reddit account, which she'd let me know, found her instagram from the reddit, and her instagram ... had her entire name and face on it. which confirmed something we'd been wondering for a while, which is that she was race-faking).

we were pretty mad, especially bc a lot of the ppl in the server are actual woc and she was not only trying to sit with us but acted like she'd suffered sooo much bc of her ethnicity when she really was a white canadian.

fast forward a few months, and it's the time of year when a certain transgender "charity" (which is run through Instagram, has no vetting process, and is essentially just tras buying stuff off of troons amazon wishlists) takes place. goldstarsappho and a few of the other server members had participated in scamming the charity the year prior, and goldstarsappho herself had notably managed to scam literal thousands worth of goods, she milked it for all she was worth.

we knew that she was probably going to scam the charity again next time it came around, and sure enough she did. to a ridiculous extent.

many of us were also scamming it, so it wasn't so much the "lying about being trans for freebies" thing we were mad about. however, we were mad that she'd race-faked and made up a bunch of random trauma, and seeing as she'd gone entirely offline for a year and we couldn't yell at her, the only way we had to get her back for being racist was to go yelling in the comments section of this charity about how "[goldstarsappho] is a liar pretending to be trans to scam you"

but to our surprise, someone had beaten us. there were a couple of tras all over this instagram page talking about how goldstarsappho is a cis woman and a scammer.

we were surprised that someone else outside of the server was onto her, so sunlight-beauty (who mods the server with me) dmed one of the tras complaining about gwen being a scammer. turned out they lived in the same building as her on her uni campus, had noticed a lot of packages with weird names arriving for her and figured she was scamming again (from what they said she seems to have a history of it). then bc goldstarsappho was an idiot and kept sharing instagram posts of her lying about having a transona on her ig story to try and get her followers to buy things off her wishlists, they realised she was scamming this particular transgender charity. and bc they were a tra, they were mad.

we had a lot of questions about goldstarsappho, one of which was whether she was a lesbian or if she was lying about that too. she'd told us a lot of contradicting stories about her sex life. some of them were things that basically made her sound asexual, like not being into sex and preferring to just hold hands, and some of them made it sound like she fucked, such as being nicknamed the "pussy slayer." she'd talked about only having had sex standing up over corpses in prison (which is one of the things that set off our bs alarm), but she'd also talked about only having sex with dental dams and rubber gloves on (which perhaps I'm just a nasty who doesn't care about safe sex as much as I should, but that sounds so unsexy), and she'd talked about liking to have sex in baths so big they were basically "hot tubs." a lot of contradictions all around basically.

sunlight-beauty asked the tra who lives in her building about whether she was a lesbian or not, and got this response

the daddy dom sex also lines up with suspicions we had about her being an adult baby. I'm unsure if she was pretending to be a lesbian to get material for conversion therapy role-play with her male lovers, or if it was just another case of her pretending to be a minority bc she loves preaching at people and pretending to be the most oppressdest person ever, as evidenced by various other lies she's told about her identity. but either way: she ain't gay

screw you gwen, if you're reading this

#answered 💌#this doesn't even encompass a quarter of her craziness #anyway #cats out of the bag now #goldstarsappho

25 notes · View notes