#I’m so sorry that this has mildly inconvenienced you! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thatdeadaquarius · 1 year

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m thinkin abt the “blunt vs flowery” language thing and…… in the year of our lord 2023, i don't even want to imagine how far back we'd have to go in genshins timeline until we see ‘hey shawty' written on a cave wall-

you try to be better about it, sometimes, using only the fanciest words and the most floral of tones, but all you ever succeed in doing is giving zhongli flashbacks to the archon war-

in the same vein: modern humor. would literally make them think "is this some sort of divine joke im too mortal to understand?" except even the archons need to cite sources on why a piece of bread falling over would be funny- maybe you slip sometimes, but you only ever get halfway through like “i’m neurodivergent and a minor” before you realize they don’t know what that means— “what if i had blue hair and pronouns” but they’re just sitting there like… doesn’t everybody have pronouns….? and kaeya has blue hair- are you implying he’s divine? what about chongyun?? xingqiu??????

anyway um. this is me bringing up my unfortunate (but very funny) habit of saying “i’ll boil you like soup” whenever i’m mildly inconvenienced and hoping it triggers Thoughts about the casual/slang threats we make and how they cope

sorry if this reads incoherently it’s 1am for me rn— also i’m debating becoming a regular anon here, are your applications open? 👉👈

SORRY IF I RAN U OFF BY NOT REPLYING QUICKLY!! BUT I’D LOVE TO HAVE LABELLED ANONS! I’ve already added some taken name I could see in my mailbox so check the pinned post and choose whatever isn’t taken! phrase or emoji, etc.! :)

this isnt super long bc ur stuff seemed chill on its own/idk what I could add! So I just focused on one aspect

gif is literally everyone reacting to you trying to speak “flowery” like them lol

ALSO u guys probably dont remember bc I took so long but I’m still writing/going to post that Blunt Lang. AU Fanfic One-Shot! so here’s some quick headcanons ill add on ive got anon!!

No TWs/Content Warnings. SFW.

so this was gonna be chill but-

BESDIES RANDOM SHIT LIKE MEME REFERENCES

THAT WONT MAKE SENSE TO THEM BC INHERENT INTERNET/DIGITAL UNDERSTANDING NEEDED

WHAT IF ALL UR JOKES OR REFERENCES ARE QUITE LITERALLY, ANCIENT??

like anon said about even the archons having to pull out sources/cite your stuff to understand it, like finding really old tablets/scrolls/carved wall words 😭

u giving Zhongli a history lesson/brush up LMAO

If ur annoyed at them u just need to make more jokes, leave em scrambling for their pocket notes LOL

I like to think since you sound the OLDEST

that the ancient shit like Phanes/Four Shades/Seven Sovereigns are the closest in speech

(look theyre all alive and shit for my genshin, goddamit i still gotta tell u guys abt my genshin fill-in lore au)

and they’re closer to the “beginning of history” in teyvat so theyd get more references

theyd literally understand u the best and they like, all in the Abyss or like deep in Teyvat,

so u just casually strolling up to Azdaha’s place instead like

“How’s your day been Azhy?”

“Same as the days many before, my lord. How are thee?”

“Good enough, hey, why don’t I bring some food from my old world by that I’ve made for you to try out? Something new, y’know?”

camera pan left to see Zhongli looking up, then back down as he scribbles notes trying to better understand, Xiao has crossed his arms and is squinting, Ganyu is behind Zhongli and is trying to peek over his shoulder, Cloud Retainer and other adepti have like hidden nearby to overhear lol

♤

FLASHBACKS FOR ZHONGLI-

HE’S OVER HERE LIKE

“Please do not disturb your countenance my Wànsuìyé, the vernacular is pleasant to mine ears and sufficient for speech.”

“I shall, uh, try my best Zhongli, thought I know ye have- wait- thy have? Whatever, accepted it, I shall keep attempting to better match thee!”

HIS FACE-

He’s literally just → 😰😣💀

(flashback to at least 1 really ancient/old god he had to fight for his life against, they were the hardest battle he’s ever faced, and Azhdaha was helping him by that point too, so it wasn’t even like he won alone… rip zhongli got ptsd)

He keeps trying to subtly stop you from practicing it, he also desperately discourages others from helping you 😭

(Zhongli was about to be called Rex Lapis again when Venti was trying to get on his last nerve by constantly encouraging you to speak fancier, but in the incorrect way, at dinner with them one time)

Like that last content with them pretending not to kow each other but 5x the tension and Venti is fooling around even more so than usual lol

THANKS FOR SENDING IN YOUR IDEAS!! I FUCKING LOVE HEARING OTHER PPLS BRAINROTS OVER STUFF!! AND SORRY AGAIN IT TOOK FOREVER!! ITS BEEN A ROUGH YEAR OF UNI FOR ME/IM GRADUATING!! <333 TYSM ANON!!

Safe Travels,

💀 ♒

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonderss / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylazaa / @genshin-impacts-mee / @wholesomey-artistt / @thedevioussmirk

#fuck my tags #I hate that tumblr doesn't remember for me #im not a machine dammit i cant remember all this shit #genshin isekai #genshin impact #genshin impact sagau #sagau #genshin sagau #genshin reader insert #genshin imagines #genshin god reader #my asks #rip to ppl who wanted longer content from me srry #its coming soon i promise #trying to post p2 of possession au and get that one shot blunt lang au posted :D

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blasphemecel · 5 months

Text

Tendou Satori — Faux Pas

PAIRING: Tendou Satori/Reader, Goshiki Tsutomu/Reader (one-sided) WORD COUNT: 3.6k TYPE: Pining, Exes To Lovers (speculatively), uhhhh idfk. Not angst or fluff but a secret third thing WARNING(S): Everyone involved is an idiot

During your first meeting, you look mildly inconvenienced if not annoyed while you shake a flier in front of his face like an angel wearing a tracksuit, ready to take him inside the figurative embrace of volleyball. Which is why he’s here, standing in the hallway and trying to find applications for the club he’s interested in.

It’s love at first sight… Or maybe his hormones are speaking. The latter is more probable.

You tap your lip in superficial thought and observe him from head to toe, then shrug. He sees all this through a shitty pink filter with hearts floating around your head. You tell him, “You seem tall enough for the old man’s standards.”

Goshiki stares back at you strangely before he plucks the sheet from your hold and promises with dramatic flair, “I’m going to prove myself when we see each other at practice! You won’t regret giving me this sheet.”

“Sure, you do that,” you say, put off by his enthusiasm.

He clenches his fist and fires up for reasons you cannot comprehend, considering you’re just an ordinary person. The determined look on his face has the potential to be endearing, but he’s holding up the line while maintaining his gaze on the ceiling, reminiscing about the last volleyball award he won in junior high.

“There are people behind you.” You frown when you say this, then gesture vaguely. “If you could…”

“Oh! Uh, yes, of course. Sorry.” Goshiki scurries away quickly after giving you an awkward bow. You wonder what his deal is, but it doesn’t stay on your mind for long.

___

Goshiki’s seatmate, Hattori, is curious about everything mundane. It isn’t that unexpected of him to ask, “And what about the manager?”

“What- uh, what manager?” he shoots back before he fiddles with the corner of his notebook to seem occupied with something, though the ruse isn’t convincing. Goshiki has been in the volleyball club for two weeks, so it’s obvious he’d know who the manager is.

“The one you were ogling,” says Hattori with a mischievous smile, “when we were getting those applications.”

Hattori did not make it in after they first applied. Now he settles for scoping for secondhand information.

“I wasn’t ogling! That’s disrespectful!” With this defensive assertion, Goshiki crosses his arms and pouts in defiance. Then he looks to the side and his face turns pensive, much to Hattori’s confusion. He looks like a kicked puppy, and has basically turned into a deflated balloon. “Manager-san is always sad.”

“Sad, how?”

“I don’t know, like… sad!” says Goshiki again — with great dismay — like it clarifies anything, but it doesn’t. He thinks about your distant eyes and bored expression, about your surly demeanor, though, and they’re all sad.

___

When Goshiki gets his straight spike right for the first time during morning practice, he turns towards you and salutes like a soldier. You stare at him, unblinking, until he asks in a loud voice, “How was it?”

“Nice,” you say blandly, giving him a thumbs-up. Goshiki fires up at the sound of that, his face doing that weird thing where you can imagine him going up in flames again, though you don’t consider your opinion particularly important. At least not enough to incite such a reaction.

“I won’t let you or the team down! That’s what being an ace is all about.”

“Ok.”

“Aha? What’s this?” This question doesn’t come from either of your mouths.

He sees you roll your eyes when you realize that Tendou has decided to invite himself to your conversation. Though he’s still new to the team and not quite used to everyone else, Goshiki doesn’t think he’d be wrong to say Tendou is the most eccentric. The only thing you can do is observe him while he approaches in an awkward lumber, like he’s trying to make you both uncomfortable on purpose.

Once he’s close enough, Tendou pats you on the shoulder. You glare at him, body tensing with pre-emptive annoyance, since you already know he’s going to do something to piss you off. Goshiki will probably be an unfortunate casualty. He strokes his chin and looks off to the side, simulating thought, but you’re sure he already came up with something to say before he walked all the way over here. “That caaaaaaan’t be right. I’m sure you can come up with something more expressive. Y’know, unleash your creative potential.”

“What?” you ask.

“What?” Goshiki asks.

“To encourage our cute little underclassman, of course!” He bends back and lets his arms dangle down to the floor like he’s performing a really shitty experimental dance. You watch in mild fascination.

“I’m not little,” Goshiki defends with as much dignity as he can muster when uttering such a sentence, then glances at you and tries to gauge if you think he’s little or not. It doesn’t seem productive to his appeal here since trying to hit on someone two grades above him is already ambitious enough. Unfortunately, your poker face is impossible to interpret.

Tendou continues on with whatever the point of his charade is as if Goshiki didn’t interrupt. “After all,” he points his two accusatory index fingers at Goshiki, who steps back either because he’s confused or because he’s intimidated, “the kid is to-tal-ly desperate for you…r approval!”

Goshiki’s cheeks redden in embarrassment and he waves his hands, trying to deny it in vain.

“Satori,” you scold, and it takes you a second to realize your mistake, and then you fumble to correct yourself, “I mean, uh, TENDOU,” adding extra disapproval in your pronunciation of his last name, brows bunching together, an angry line appearing on your forehead. The whole thing ends up sounding ridiculous.

In one stiff movement, Tendou stands up, assuming a normal pose. Then he throws an arm around your shoulder and pulls you close. “The future rests in your hands,” he declares, gesturing in the air like he’s making a grand statement.

You shrug him off and your conversation derails into pointless bickering. Frazzled, Goshiki stays rooted to the spot, the awful blush never settling down. Was Tendou mocking him, or was it supposed to be good-natured ribbing? Why did he even involve him when it’s clear he just wanted to talk to you?

It registers in Goshiki’s head, right then, that even though he’s the topic of conversation, this has nothing to do with him at all.

___

Semi is whining about something in the locker rooms where most of the team is preparing to get dressed and head back to the dorms for today. Shirabu has his earphones in, but Goshiki recently found out he only pretends to listen to music before leaving since he doesn’t want to seem ‘too interested’ in whatever the others are doing. This revelation had been accidental, and the explanation was even more confusing.

“I can’t stand practice lately,” he says in frustration, stuffing his jersey in his bag like it has offended him.

“Is it because-”

Before Ushijima can bring up how Semi is a Bench Boy now without realizing he’s being a jerk, he interrupts him to explain, “It’s like a sausage party.” Ushijima opens his mouth to ask what the hell that means, so Semi spares him the effort and elaborates, “All that damn showing off.”

Goshiki fiddles with his shoelaces and tries to disappear. Great, now a third-year hates him. It must’ve somehow slipped his mind that Goshiki is quite literally still here, but maybe Semi just doesn’t care.

“It is inconvenient when Tendou gets worked up and starts making mistakes, but his skills are still beneficial to the team when he is doing good,” Ushijima says, monotone as always, and this appears to be his attempt at placating Semi.

“Yeah, but you know it’s his fault and all, and then he cried about it, and now he’s doing whatever the hell this is.”

Ushijima shrugs to communicate his indifference while Semi mumbles something under his breath about how unfair it is that everyone but him is immune to ‘the bullshit.’ Confused, Goshiki throws them both a glance and frowns. He was sure Semi was talking about how hard he was trying to impress you, but now they’ve brought up Tendou all of a sudden. He can’t even begin to comprehend what events they’re referencing.

___

Today, when Goshiki struts up to you, he seems more energetic than usual. You kind of can’t stand him in the mornings because he’s way too awake and energetic and in an overall good mood. His high spirits are almost blinding.

“Good morning,” you greet, flipping through your clipboard.

He clears his throat and straightens his posture. The ‘online resource’ (a shitty site) he used last night told him a good way of getting close to a crush is making them laugh. Then, as if reciting something he memorized, Goshiki raises his finger and says, “Two cannibals are eating a clown.”

You stare at him, wondering where this is going.

“One says to the other, ‘Does this taste funny to you?’”

What you do next is worse than your initial lack of reaction. You give Goshiki an unconvincing smile. Like never before, he wants to run off and bury his head in some sand like an ostrich.

Tendou, apparently once again intrigued by an interaction between you two, decides to intervene by putting on his news reporter voice. With his bottle in hand acting as a microphone, he starts his fake broadcast. “Goshiki Tsutomu, that’s what he calls himself. Not us, we don’t call him that. I can’t say what we call him on national television. I caaaaaaan’t, folks! Aaaanyway, Goshiki Tsutomu, he claims to be a comedian.”

“I don’t,” Goshiki argues while you hit yourself on the forehead.

“He does, folks,” Tendou says. “He claims he’s a stand-up comedian-”

“When did it change into ‘stand-up comedian’?” you ask, tapping your foot against the floor like you can’t wait for this exchange to end. And to be fair, that’s probably true and justified.

“-but he can’t even get the laugh track to work. Sad!”

Goshiki asks too earnestly, “Wait, are there laugh tracks during stand-up shows?”

Tendou shoves his water bottle in your face to signify it’s your turn to talk. “What does the incompetent paid audience that can’t even fake-laugh have to say?”

You scowl at him and refuse to say a single word.

Tendou turns his attention back to Goshiki. “Bangs this cool are illegal, sir.”

“You think so?”

With a sigh, perhaps defeated because Goshiki seems too flattered by the compliment (which means you’ve lost now that he’s on Team Tendou), you walk away. Getting verbally abused by Coach Washijo isn’t as unpleasant as this. Tendou watches you go, eyes wide and mouth slightly open as usual, and then he tilts his head and squints.

Confused, Goshiki follows Tendou’s line of sight and when he looks at you again, he’s shocked to see that you’re stifling a laugh by pressing your hand against your mouth. The sight catches him off-guard, his cheeks flushing again as they usually do when you’re involved.

Tendou puts his hands on his hips and leans in to whisper conspiratorially, “What do you think prickly ol’ Manager-chan is laughing about?”

Goshiki frowns and offers a weak jerk of his shoulder in response. He has no idea, really. Maybe it’s a little silly that he tried to tell you a joke when he doesn’t know what your sense of humor is like.

___

The strong pitter patter of rain hitting every surface of this godforsaken school resounds in Goshiki’s ears even while he’s panicking in his desperate search for his umbrella. It’s pouring. The walk to the dorms isn’t long, sure, but he would get drenched if he walked out without any cover in this weather.

You pass by the umbrella stands to get yours on the way out and notice Goshiki simply on account of his frantic movements. Once you’re within earshot, you ask, “Did you forget it?”

Jumpy in your presence, he startles like you’ve caught him doing something wrong. “Um, I think so,” he squeaks out.

Your paths don’t cross often during school. This is maybe his first time seeing you in the school uniform properly. Once again you’re like a godsent angel — the coincidental timing does not elude him. But instead of offering club positions, you’ve now arrived to absolve him of his sins (forgetting to carry his umbrella to school despite watching the weather forecast). “You can take mine if you want.”

“Really?!” Oh, so kind!!! A tear almost slips out of gratitude. Goshiki’s delusions of divine goodwill shatter upon contemplating the situation for around a second, however. He pouts in genuine distress. “What about you? You can’t just walk out in the rain.”

You forcefully pass the umbrella onto him anyway, and he gets a romantic glint in his eyes as he perks up and imagines walking together with you. It’d be cinematic, he thinks.

Before his mouth can comply with his brain and stutter out the offer, you pull out another umbrella.

“Don’t steal that!” Goshiki shrieks with his jaw hanging open, and he waves his hands around as if to convince you, though he doesn’t make any move to wrestle it out of your hold either.

“It’s ok,” you say. “It’s Tendou’s.”

… So mean.

___

Usually when Tendou screams ‘I’ve made a mistake!’ it’s because of a wrong guess, not anything this blatant and uncoordinated. Divided in two groups, they’re near the end of the last practice match for this afternoon when he somehow ends up falling face-first into the net. Semi cusses him out under his breath and prepares to maim him with the ball whenever he grabs a hold of it while Goshiki pulls off the most incredulous expression he can muster.

The unfortunate thing is that coach Washijo looks like he’s nearing a medical emergency. During the lecture Tendou only rubs his neck sheepishly, and then his lips twist down when Washijo orders him to run twenty laps around the school. The evil geezer’s attention shifts towards you next. “And you. Make sure he doesn’t leave until he’s done, alright?”

Your eye twitches.

“Don’t make that face!”

For a second Goshiki wonders how Washijo-san could’ve possibly seen how constipated you look, but then he glances back to Tendou nearby and realizes he’s sticking his tongue out at you. You shake your head and shove your hands in your pockets before making your way to the exit with a barely-kept composure.

“Come on, out of here. I don’t even want to look at you right now,” says Washijo, ushering him with impatient hand gestures when Tendou continues to just… stand there.

He trails after you with something which suspiciously looks like a grin on his face. On your way out, you indignantly whisper, “You did that on purpose,” but Goshiki can’t hear the rest of it after you smack the gym door closed.

“Back to work,” Washijo barks out, clapping his hands. “We still have a few minutes left.”

Another first year ends up replacing Tendou on Goshiki’s team and they lose, which means tomorrow won’t be pleasant for the players involved. He cringes at the thought.

By the time he gets changed and heads out to return to his dorm, he wonders if Tendou is still running around and if you’re following him in circles — the mental image is the slightest bit amusing — but he doesn’t have to contemplate it for long because he spots you sitting down on the concrete in the yard while Tendou’s lying down like a starfish.

He tries to rest his foot on your shoulder, but you duck him. Goshiki lingers, trying to make sense of the scene. Tendou is saying something to you, but he can’t quite make out what it is. In response, you end up hatefully throwing the zip-up top of your tracksuit at him and stand up to return to the gym and put everything away.

In your hassle, you don’t spare Goshiki a glance when you pass him by until he tells you an over the top good night.

You raise an eyebrow, perhaps for his lack of volume control, before you return the sentiment in a much calmer manner, and he’s flustered in your presence once again. It’s a weird kind of embarrassment — Goshiki feels like an idiot, but it’s also pleasant, as if he’s deriving enjoyment from the anxiety your minimal interactions cause him, and he doesn’t really understand. On a clinical level it’s infatuation, but there’s something about these sensations that evades him.

You’re long gone by the time Tendou comes into view, fiddling with the sleeves of your sweater. It’s an awkward fit on him, but he seems happy to be wearing it.

“What? No good night for me?” he asks with fake sadness.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” Goshiki is good at bowing at the right angle and always does it with too much vigor. “Good night, Tendou-san.”

“Come on man, stop yelling. You gotta play it cool,” Tendou says in a sing-song voice before waving goodbye.

Goshiki can’t help thinking that Tendou of all people isn’t playing it cool at all.

___

The locker room has cleared out by the time Goshiki resolves to go back and help you to rectify last afternoon’s awkwardness. And all the awkwardness before that. You’ll graduate this year, he reasons, giving himself a pep talk on the way to the gym with occasional nods. Maybe you can be friends at least?

Lost in his inner monologue, he almost bangs his head against the gaping door. Light emits from inside, exposing parts of the hallway. For some reason he’s cautious when he steps around it. Must be some leftover nerves even though what he’s doing isn’t even incriminating.

Goshiki is hanging by the door still when he hears you say, “If you stayed behind just to argue with me, I swear-”

He tenses, blinking rapidly. Can you tell he’s there? Your voice is coming from the storage room, so he can’t see anything besides two vague, elongated shadows spanning across the floor.

“I’m not trying to argue with you! I’m just talking to you and you always turn it into this huge thing.” He recognizes everyone on the team by their voices now, and he hadn’t noticed Tendou left to come see you instead of joining the other third-years like he does every other night.

“Because you say dumbass shit that pisses me off.” Goshiki considers leaving. He doesn’t want to butt in on your conversation with Tendou — it already seems tense enough — and eavesdropping is impolite. “Also, you really need to leave that freshman alone.”

“Who? My favorite rapper Lil’ Bowlcut? He’s got a name, ya know? Go-shi-ki.”

Okay, he might have to stay around now. Just for a little, he justifies. To find out what this is about — a purely educational purpose.

“You’re even worse than me, always pretending to be oblivious and barely acknowledging him,” Tendou says after your lack of a verbal response. “Just put the kid out of his misery. It’s sad! Like when they show flashbacks to the swing from Naruto.” The last sentence sounds sarcastic as hell, but Goshiki disregards it, frowning.

“I don’t see how teasing him about it helps. You’re just fucking rude for no reason when you know better.”

“Manager-chan is still so self-righteous. Maybe we should cause a house fire and you can go in and save some children.”

“Tendou,” you warn.

“… I don’t like it when you call me that.”

“Ok.”

“You can’t call me mean and then break my heart like this!”

“Tendou,” you snap.

“Owwwwwww, it huuuuuuuuurts.”

“Stop with this. It doesn’t even make any sense.”

“Do you want me to grovel for forgiveness or something? Because I really hope you know I’m not above that. At. All.”

“You broke up with me.”

“Yeah, and you just agreed, and then you wanna be mad about what I said when you don’t even think we can make it through university-”

“I ‘just agreed.’ Wow. Tendou, you can’t break up with someone as a social experiment to test their faith in the relationship.”

“That’s not true! I wasn’t doing that,” he argues. “I was telling you how I felt, but you never wanna take any responsibility ever. You loooooved having an excuse to get in fights with those bullies, but when you’re the one doing something then-”

“I was, like, eleven, shut up, and I have all that bad shit on my record now. If you have such a low opinion of me, obviously I’m gonna think my stupid fucking relationship from middle school isn’t gonna last.”

“No, you were thinking that for a while,” he says.

“Because we’re graduating in a few months, yeah.”

“I don’t think badly of you, are you insane? Nothing like that happened!”

“When you say you think I look down on you, that’s pretty insulting to me.”

“Well, that’s because I thought you were better than me. It was just a stupid insecurity thing. I don’t even care about that stuff anymore,” he says.

“Then-”

“You’re like a magnet for underclassmen,” Tendou jokes as an attempt at levity. “Remember when that goober from Aoba Johsai tried to pull the ball trick on you?”

“Yeah,” you say, laughing a little.

“I miss you,” he admits.

“Ok.”

“Seriously?! Don’t be like that.”

You giggle again.

After some silence Goshiki sees the two shadows move, coming together in one. You’re hugging. Then there’s some more shifting and tilting. You’re kissing, like you’ve probably kissed before.

He tries to avoid making any noise when he leaves, disappointed with himself for staying around, curiosity having gotten the best of him. He definitely shouldn’t have heard any of this. And though Goshiki doesn’t think he has the right to be upset, he’s still lost, even stung, as his mind wanders off while he scurries to his room in a daze.

___

I almost forgot to upload this here lol I dont know i arbitrarily dont post things on herer that I do on ao3. Te question is "does something deserve to be on the blog" . I also havent posted on here for a while so now im embarrassed to do it. Sorry for using my blog. I wont do it again. i also hate tagging things on here it seems sodesperate. Like on instagram. Guys look at me i wrote tendou satori x reader haikyuu x reader haikyuu imagines whatever whatever. Lol idek what Im talking about it's never that serious

#haikyuu x you #tendou satori x reader #tendou x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagine

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constellation-savvy · 2 years

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Fandom ask game: Star Wars (if you want to get more specific, do Clone Wars or Rebels)

I’m so so so sorry that this took so long! I promise I’m not ignoring you!!!

-blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)- Tup and Kit Fisto! Tup bc I have a very similar personality (in addition to chronic headaches and a painful history of snapped hair ties) and I just care him a lot. Kit bc he’s exactly what a Jedi should be in that he’s incredibly smart, thinks things through before acting, puts everyone else’s safety before his own, is an incredibly gifted duelist, is so humble about all of it, and has wonderful comedic timing and he’s really really really nice looking too. Me loving him so much is definitely bc I’m a marine biology student and my interest is definitely academic yeah that’s absolutely what it is definitely

-scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)- probably also Tup but that’s mostly from fanon that I admittedly really enjoy and he’s a character I’m very protective of. If I have to pick someone I haven’t already picked then BB-8 as they are so incredibly baby

-scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)- Again Tup and Dogma. Y’all are sleeping on them

-glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)- Again Kit Fisto bc the marine biology braincell goes into overdrive, or Jocasta Nu bc we don’t get enough of her ever

-poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)- Probably Dogma again bc everyone is sleeping on him but if I have to choose someone different then Fox

-horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)- If I’m just mildly inconveniencing anyone in a jokey way it’s gonna Fives, Jesse, and Hardcase bc they deserve it a little. If I’m actually trying to bother someone it’s gonna be Kylo Ren or General Grievous bc it sounds entertaining

-eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)- Our good buddy Sheev is definitely going to superhell he deserves it. And Pong Krell while I’m at it. And Taun We I really don’t like her

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diavolosthots · 3 years

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I adore your work and I am so happy I caught you open request it's my first time! May I please request something with Diavolo handling his human exchange student being a kid who is like 6 who is convinced that Diavolo os their dad and clings to him crying when someone tries to take them away because they don't want to loose their dad scared of being alone again? 100000% platonic obvs. It just sounds cute and sad because Dia could probably relate to the poor kid and I'm a sucker for soft dia and found family stuff. As per your rules that I hope I'm getting right with mc being a kid being okay I want you to know this is not and oc just a basic sad little kid with family issues. Just don't want you to think it is when I swear ots not because of how detailed I felt I was giving. Sorry for rambling I really admire you and your skill and just am so nervous making a request.

Your rambling got cuter and cuter and I couldn't help myself from smiling. Yes this is okay and yes you've read the rules right :)

You're Not Not My Dad (DIAVOLO X GN!PLATONIC!CHILD!READER)

For a task he trusted the eldest with, he certainly didn’t think Lucifer would decide to let a literal child enter the Devildom. “Lord Diavolo, I swear I had no clue! On the paper it said 26, not 6!” Sure enough; a quick glance at the paper and it indeed said ‘age: 26’ and yet here they are, which a barely functioning human in a world they can’t even comprehend. “We can’t keep them here, under any circumstance.” Another quick glance at the child in front of him and then the pure fear they had in their eyes when they saw the rest of the demons in the room put Diavolo in a tough spot. “I will take them home immediately.” But the minute Lucifer tried to reach out for you, you jumped up and ran to Diavolo, clinging onto his pant leg and hiding behind him, “don’t let him take me, daddy!” Diavolo’s whole body stiffened at the name, “Daddy? I’m not your father.” But you would have none of it, still clinging to him and actually screaming out when Barbatos tried to pry you off. “It’s okay Barbatos, I’ll just take them.” He mainly said that because your screaming was unbearable but when he leaned down to pick you up so he could take you back, you had tears streaming down your cheeks and he hates admitting that it actually broke his heart, “why are you crying little one?” “Because the bad men want to take me away from you, daddy.” You snuggled into him, wrapping your arms around his neck and clinging to him for dear life, and for once in his own life, Diavolo wasn’t quite sure on what to do.

That was a couple months ago. No matter how many times he tried to take you back home, you’d find a way to cling to him, kicking and screaming for him to not leave you too, so he decided to keep you, at least for a little while. He made sure to remind you every day that he was certainly not your father, but you never believed him so he gave up at some point and decided to just have a serious talk with you when you’re older and more willing to listen and comprehend. “Daddy!” Sadly, having you around also meant that he barely had time to get enough things done and Barbatos was constantly running after you and not getting things done, either. Speaking of Barbatos, he’s still salty about the time you decided to bite his tail and has made it a point to never be in his demon form around you. “My Lord, I’m so sorry, I can’t seem to keep (Y/N) occupied.”

In all honesty, Diavolo’s eye was twitching because this is the third meeting you decided to interrupt, not this week, but today alone. “(Y/N). Please listen to Barbatos.” You climbed up in his chair, sitting proudly and taking random papers from his desk, pretending to read them, “vetoed! Trashed! Wait… this one looks cool, it has a seal on it!” Diavolo snatched that one from you so fast, you could’ve thought it was just your imagination, “(Y/N), are you listening to me? I said you ha--!” “Daddy look, if you take two pens and hold it up, it looks like Barbatos has horns!” Barbatos was also getting mildly irritated but he was trying so hard to keep his calm. “(Y/N), why don’t you listen to Lord Diavolo? I’m sure he’ll be more than happy to play with you at the en--!” “Look Daddy, I’m wearing your coat!” You seemed so happy, so full of life and as much as it inconvenienced him right now, Diavolo couldn’t bring himself to get stern with you, and he didn’t have to. “(Y/N)! Listen to what people are telling you!” Because it was Barbatos who lost his cool, and apparently also his manners.

The loud sound of his voice along with the fact that his smile dropped to a glare had the whole room silent. Even Lucifer who was part of the meeting, managed to stand at attention. No one remembers the last time Barbatos lost his patience and all of them wondered if he ever lost his patience before this, but that’s not the issue now. Your lip was quivering, tears threatening to spill over as small sobs escaped your mouth, “no…” Diavolo knew what would be next and he doesn’t have the heart or the time for it. “Ssh.. It’s okay, come here. Daddy’s got you.” He quickly picks you up, holding you against his chest and stroking through your hair lovingly, trying to keep you from screaming out. A crying you was a very loud you and he’s trying to save everyone’s ears from that spiel. “Barbatos, take Lucifer and leave, please.” The butler, as much as he wanted to just yank the kid back to human realm, could do nothing but nod, his usual smile returning to his face as he bowed, “of course, My Lord.” He waited until Lucifer went ahead of him, following suit and then closing the door behind him.

Diavolo let out a long sigh, seating himself back in his chair and then propping you up in his lap. He pulled you back far enough to look at you, golden eyes soft while one of his hands continued to stroke through your hair, “he didn’t mean it, but he does have a point. You can’t keep interrupting me all the time, (Y/N).” You brought one of your hands up to wipe some of the tears before leaning back against him, burying your chest in his face, “b-but…. I just want to spend time with you, Daddy…” Another sigh escaped Diavolo as his mind raced to find solutions, turning left to right in his chair kind of in a rocking motion as he did so. “I know that, but I have things I need to get done before I can have fun time with you.” Diavolo rested his cheek against your head, staring at the paperwork on his desk and then at the sealed piece of paper that he took from you earlier.

“What if… when I don’t have a meeting, what if I set up a small desk for you right here, right beside mine, and we can work together, hm? How does that sound?” Your head immediately lifted off of his shoulder, a wide smile evident on your lips and Diavolo felt his heart settle with content at the sight, “yes! I want that, Daddy! And then you and I can rule together!” Diavolo laughed softly, shaking his head, “hm… we’ll see about that. You have to promise me you’ll listen to Barbatos though AND you have to leave when I have meetings, okay?” You nodded, holding up your tiny pinky, “pinky promise!” which Diavolo gladly wrapped around his before kissing it softly, turning you back around in his lap so you can watch him go through some paperwork. Part of him just hopes you’ll find this boring and leave, but a tiny, other part of him hopes you’ll stick around for a little while longer.

You may not be his child, but you’ve grown on him, and at this point, he’d do anything for you so as long as it didn’t put the Devildom in danger. He loves you, as if you were his own.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios #obey me lord diavolo #shall we date diavolo #om! diavolo #obey me diavolo #diavolo obey me #obey me diavolo x reader

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thewriterowl · 3 years

Note

Owl do you have any abo dinluke headcanons?? Would you possibly share them with the class???

Ok then!! I have been tempted for ABO lol

Din is Alpha and Luke is Omega, to no surprise for me lol Neither are usually too caught up in these "labels". Neither really think it matters too much in truth. Din isn't too interested, for the longest time, on the idea of having his own family and taking care of pups or a mate. He lives a dangerous, rather self-centered, life-style. He just provides what he cans to his clan and keeps to himself. If he has a bad enough rut he just goes and takes care of it and that's i.

Luke just doesn't think he makes a good Omega. On Tatooine, even Omegas needed to be large to survive. Luke was also a bit more stubborn and wild, then he got strong being a Jedi, and it just wasn't what he was told a good Omega should be. So he figured that he wasn't going to ever attract a mate of his own. Maybe it's confirmed to him later when (due to his injuries or something else) he couldn't have kids. He, personally, wasn't too upset about this (if he wanted kids, he had wanted to adopt even before this) but knew most Alphas would be very turned off by it.

Luke also figures he's a broken Omega because he didn't really have heats like other Omegas do. No one ever comments on his scent either so it was easy to add that into the equation.So, he just accepts it as it is.

Each go through their own story without really anything changing...except up until when they meet.

Luke knew this was this man's child and he could not separate a family like that. So he offers for Din to come with him to where they'll train. Luke knows instantly the man is an alpha and did not want to anger him or make him upset though he did not think this alpha was violent or anything. It just seemed like the right thing to do

Din does not know Luke is an omega, partially due to how he presents himself and also partially due to him hiding behind his mask most of the time so he can't really scent him.

So they get to Yavin IV and everything is going ok. Din assumes Luke is a beta so he allows himself to get a friendship going. Luke is very easy to like and talk to and he raises Luke like an Omega, had more strength than most alphas, but came across as so unconcerned about these things like a beta. After a while Din realizes he is really fond of the Jedi.

Luke is head over heels for Din but never says anything about it. He figures Din wouldn't care for a broken Omega so he just enjoys their friendship though it breaks his heart a bit as he realizes he wants to mate with him but he was good at hiding pain and just sort of ignores it to keep things good and Din comfortable.

Then Luke realizes that he is about to have a heat and it may actually be a pretty intense one due to his feelings for Din. Well, that's aggravating. Well, guess he best figure things out with Din so he doesn't bother him. So he comes into the kitchen one day, Din helping to feed Grogu and is all, "I'm sorry to do this but I may need to leave...or you may want to. You could take Grogu."

This confuses Din a lot. He thinks that maybe it's a jedi sense.

"Oh, no," Luke wave that off with a laugh, "I guess being with an alpha for so long and without any stress has made my cycle stronger than normal. I just don't want you to be inconvenienced or for things to smell off or whatever."

"...huh?"

"My heat?"

And it smashes into Din like a star destroyer. He truly had no idea that Luke was an omega this whole time and now he is so panicked and freaked out and was starting to run on instinct. Why hadn't he known? He wasn't prepared! They needed to get rations ready, water, plenty of blankets, stuff to make a nest...so many things!

Luke is all confused.

Din goes into Alpha mood instantly. He calls Boba or some other friend to come babysit Grogu for a bit, he starts to get things ready, though is mildly panicked that he doesn't have protection. Was Luke ready for a baby? Din certainly was...but he didn't want to overwhelm the younger man. Luke states that it's fine, he's handled his heats before and he'll be fine. Din doesn't have to worry so much.

WTF??? He's alpha, of course he needs to! He needs to provide for his omega!

So it's like a few hours of weird misunderstandings.

They manage to get some talking in before the heat hits but only enough to get some things cleared up and then the heat hits and they're both very busy for a few days. Only once they're done and just sorta lounging on the bed, almost blissed out, and they're able to talk to clear things up a bit more.

Needless to say they're mated and though a bit awkward in how it happened, they end up very happy together and go to adopt many more kids

#inbox dinluke

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skylights2000 · 3 years

Note

hi dear!! first of all i love your writing sm and i hope you're taking care of yourself!! but i've been feeling kinda down :(( so why not request a writing from one of my favorite writers!! :D so! maybe some fluff with kazuichi, leon and mondo comforting their s/o who's been struggling with their mental health and just getting out of bed? :) it could be either hc or one shots, whatever floats ur boat! and if you cant write this that's fine ! <3

Aww, I’m so happy you enjoy what I write!

I’m sorry you’ve been feeling bad though. If you ever need to talk, I’m only a message away.

As for taking care of myself..uh..I’m trying 😅

Anyway, thank you for the request! This is actually something I’ve been wanting to do anyway, but I couldn’t decide who it should be about, so you solved that for me! 💜

Kazuichi:

Kazuichi is an awkward guy, so he’s not really sure how to approach it at first.

He panics when you show up to his house with dark circles and tear stained cheeks, but after the initial shock, he quickly jumps into action.

He takes your hands and leads you inside, asking if there’s anything you need.

You weakly ask for some water. Your throat feels like someone shoved sandpaper down it.

He’ll sit you down on the couch and rush to the kitchen, returning a minute later with a glass of water, which you instantly down. It soothes the burning in your throat and makes you feel a little better.

He never asks you to say anything (He usually doesn’t know how to), but you don’t mind.

If you want to talk, he’ll listen to anything you have to say. You’ll tell him about your troubles, whether it be a mess up or just feeling sad. He’ll hold your hand and comfort you. He’ll even offer advice if he can.

If you don’t want to talk, he’ll let you lay your head in his lap while he combs his fingers through your hair.

Usually, you’ll fall asleep like that, and he never has the heart to move you, so he’ll stay there and let you sleep for as long as possible.

If he does have to leave, he’s very careful about moving you.

If you’re a light sleeper, he’ll cover you in a blanket and kiss you on the forehead.

If you’re a deep sleeper, he’ll carry you to his bed so you can sleep better. You’ll roll onto your side and burrow your face into his pillow. He’ll smile and brush your hair back and kiss you on the cheek.

He always leaves you a note telling you where he went and when he’ll be back.

Leon:

Leon gets worried when you don’t answer his messages, so he heads over to check on you.

He gets even more worried when you don’t answer the door. He tries to call you, but when he gets no response, he lets himself in with the spare key you gave him.

He finds you laying in your bed, staring up at the ceiling. You don’t move when he comes towards you, nor do you move when he sits down beside you.

When a tear slips down your face, you scrub it away forcefully. He catches your hand and laces his fingers through yours.

“It’s okay to cry.”

That’s all it takes for the dam to break. You choke on the sob that leaves your throat, and he lays down beside you. He pulls you towards him, and you roll onto your side, burying your face in his shoulder.

He rubs soft circles on your back while you cry to your heart’s content.

When you do stop, he whispers that it’s okay and that he’s right here. He tells you that he’s proud of you for being strong even when things are hard. Even when you argue, he insists that it takes a lot of strength to keep going even when you don’t want to, and he’ll tell you as many times as it takes for you to believe him.

Mondo:

Mondo can be a bit brash about it, but it’s only because he cares so much.

You have to remind yourself of that when he physically hauls you out of bed.

You can complain and argue as much as you want, but that won’t stop him.

If you’re still dressed from the day, he’ll throw you over his shoulder and carry you outside. He’ll take you to the little cake shop you love or just walk to the park down the street with you. Sometimes, you even manage to convince him to push you on the swing.

If you’re still in your pajamas, he’ll carry you to the couch and put on a movie. You don’t always want to be hugged, and he understands that.

If you don’t, he’ll let you lay on the couch with your legs across his lap.

If you do want to cuddle, you’ll sit sideways in his lap with your back against the armrest and your head on his shoulder.

He’s always happy to listen, and though he’ll threaten to beat up anyone that even mildly inconvenienced you, once you calm him down, he can actually offer some pretty good advice.

Sometimes when you’re sad, he’ll take you for a ride on his motorcycle. He’ll take you to your spot, a little hill that overlooks the whole town.

He always understands when you get like that. He knows you can’t help it, so he just does his best to comfort you.

#danganronpa #danganronpa imagines #danganronpa goodbye despair #gender neutral s/o #kazuichi souda #danganronpa fluff #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #kazuichi imagine #kazuichi x reader #leon x reader #leon kuwata #leon imagine #mondo imagine #mondo x reader #mondo owada

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skyriderwednesday · 3 years

Text

Agathea

On a quiet Friday afternoon, Vimes spots Drumknott walking down the street with a plant.

(G rated, HC: Drumknott has a cat, 1335 words)

Also on AO3

Vimes was used to all sorts of unusual sights walking the streets of Ankh-Morpork. He had to be, considering that the background level of 'normal' here matched other places' standards for 'out of the ordinary'. 'Out of the ordinary' in Ankh-Morpork trended toward 'highly unusual' before ever making it to 'mildly curious'. 'Mildly curious' was however exactly the classification appropriate on a quiet Friday afternoon (itself an oddity) for quiet little Rufus Drumknott walking towards him carrying a potted plant. Vimes waited until the distance between them was polite for acquaintances before catching his attention. He leaned against a cart that didn't seem to have any intention of moving soon. "Afternoon," he called. The young man lifted his focus from the smooth, even paving stones and came to a conscientious stop a little across from him, giving a wide passage to any other users of the street -- though presently there wasn't anyone else around. "Good afternoon, Commander Vimes," he said levelly, holding the plant a little protectively in both hands. "What're you taking a plant for a walk for?" Vimes asked in good humour. "I've just bought it," Drumknott said, a little affronted at the suggestion that he would carry a small pot of ornamental ivy around the city on a whim. "I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it, just asking that's all." Vimes straightened his helmet. "Gonna go on your desk is it?" "No," Drumknott examined the plant for a moment and delicately plucked off a wilting leaf. "It's going to be put on a shelf." Vimes nodded broadly. "Mind your cat doesn't get to it then, they love to chew on plants." Drumknott tilted down his head and looked at him under the brow of his glasses. "It isn't intended for my chambers." Vimes thought hard for a few moments and stopped leaning on the cart. "...I thought even the official birthday wasn't until next month..." A less professional man would have covered his eyes, or at least rolled them. Rufus Drumknott was both extremely professional and holding a potted plant. His expression barely altered. "You haven't forgotten an occasion, commander," he said patiently. "There is simply an empty shelf in his lordship's living quarters that requires an occupant." "Oh," Vimes said, slightly relieved. "So he asked you to get him a plant then?" Drumknott was quiet for a moment, studying the plant and its dark purple arrow-shaped leaves. "No..." he replied slowly. "He did not." "Well," Vimes said, trying to sound reassuring, "I'm sure he'll like it. He uses that mug you got him." Drumknott flushed a little and very carefully shifted the pot into one hand to push his glasses back up his nose. "Thank you. I hope that you are right." "Alright," Vimes said, feeling that he was a little too far away to properly end the conversation but also that closing the distance now would be awkward, "I'll see you later." Drumknott resumed holding the pot in both hands and nodded. "Yes," he said. "Have a good evening, Commander Vimes." Vimes creased slightly in almost a smile. "You too, hope his lordship likes his plant." Drumknott faltered a moment as if his plans for the conversation had been altered, then proceeded with them anyway. "Yes," he said, "good evening." He returned his focus to the paving stones and carried on his way up the street. Vimes watched after him for a few moments, then felt for a split second like he was being watched. Anyway... he shook the feeling off and carried on his own way in the opposite direction.

---

"Ah, there you are Drumknott," Vetinari said as Rufus opened the office door. "I had wondered where you were." He stopped on the threshold and held the plant low against himself. "I'm sorry to have inconvenienced you, sir." Vetinari paused in tapping excess ink from his pen. "Hm? Oh, no,” he said. “No inconvenience, I had merely noticed your absence." Rufus relaxed a little and moved truly inside the office, pushing the door closed with his foot. "I had mentioned that I was going out sir," he said, noting that the teapot on the desk was still in the position where he had left it and the cup was still upside-down in its saucer. "Had you? I apologise, I must not have been paying attention." Vetinari looked up over his reading glasses. "What is it you have there?" he asked, craning his head a little. Rufus walked over gently and placed the plant on the desk. Vetinari put down his pen and removed his glasses to look at it properly. "It's an Agatean Ivy, sir. I thought you might like it in your rooms." Vetinari lifted one of the nearer leaves with a fingertip, carefully tilting it into and out of the light. "It is certainly a striking colour," he said. "Is it permanent?" Rufus recalled what the plant shop owner had said to him. "The leaves are light green when they first appear, sir. The purple develops as they mature." Vetinari nodded lightly. "Well, it is a beautiful plant," he said, gently smoothing his beard. "I only worry for its need for light." The only natural light that entered Vetinari's rooms did so via his bedroom. The plant was intended for the sitting room, the most seldom used and therefore dimmest lit. Rufus of course had thought of that. "The Agatean Ivy naturally prefers dark environments, sir," he said. "It should do quite well in occasional lamp light." "Ah," Vetinari said. "You have considered this. I should also expect it requires very little water?" Lack of water had been the demise of the last occupant of the gap on the shelf. Rufus nodded, "A gentle mist once a week shall suffice, sir, though it will not suffer from overwatering." And the time before that, there had been too much water. Vetinari lightened. "I see," he said with a smile others would not have noticed. "Well, I thank you very much, Mr Drumknott. It shall make a fine addition to my living space." "You are very welcome sir," Rufus said. "Now, I did bring you tea before I left, sir, but I should think that it is now cold." The light changed in Vetinari's eyes as he finally and belatedly noticed the teapot. "Ah, so you did. I regret that it entirely failed my notice." Rufus nodded inevitably. "Should you like that we instate the plant and take tea in your rooms, sir?" Vetinari looked from the forgotten teapot to the plant, then up at Rufus. He picked up his pen from the desk and applied his signature to the bottom of the page before him through mere knowledge of where it was meant to be and scarcely watching his hand as he did so. Then he returned the pen to the inkwell. Rufus did not comment upon this. He merely removed the pen from the inkwell, wiped its tip on the adjacent cloth and placed it into its rest. Vetinari didn't comment on being corrected either. "Yes," he said, gently clapping his hands to his knees. "I think I shall." Rufus took the freshly signed sheet and placed it neatly upon the pile of completed documents that had accumulated in the time since he had left. "Very good, sir." Vetinari raised his reading glasses back onto his nose and studied the plant. "I think she shall require a name, don't you?" "As long as it is not after me, sir," Rufus said. Vetinari hummed in amusement. "She is an Agatean Ivy, you said?" "Yes sir." "Then I think 'Agathea' will be suitable." Rufus felt out the name on his tongue. Ag-ah-thee-uh. Older and more elegant than simply 'Agatha', less on the nose than calling the plant 'Agatea'. He smiled. "Yes sir, that fits her nicely." Vetinari smiled a more perceptible smile to match. "Then we shall put Agathea in her pride of place, and we shall take tea that is not so cruelly forgotten

about." "Splendid, sir."

#discworld #discworld fic #rufus drumknott #sam vimes #havelock vetinari #a plant! a plant for his lordship #that hopefully won't be dead in six months #look he trained as an assassin #keeping things alive isn't his strong suit #look i'm cross-posting again what's wrong with me?

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starlocked01 · 3 years

Text

Look Alive, Sunshine

AO3 Link

Dukexiety Week Day 7- Music WC: 1.8K Summary: Remus picks Virgil up from his dorm in the middle of the night to combat an old fear. Content Warning: Swearing, Panicking, references to past suicidal thoughts

@dukexietyweek

A/N: This is actually in the same universe as When Can I See You Again? which is the first dukexiety story I wrote featuring Soul mark timers, lots of miscommunication and drama, and fun. And fight club. If you've liked this week's oneshots, maybe give WCISYA? a try ^_^ Thank you everyone for reading along and sharing this week <3

Despite Remus' progress with Dr. B. and despite over a thousand nights with no incidents, Virgil still could not shake his fear of the Xs. He hadn’t seen them in years, but some nights Virgil stayed up to watch his soul mark countdown the seconds until Remus could reassure him he'd lost sleep for no reason.

Most of the nights when he stayed up watching with growing anxiety, Virgil didn't even try to text Remus. His boyfriend needed the sleep and would just worry when he woke up until Virgil finally rolled out of bed and answered his reassurances. Tonight was too much. Tonight, not even the steady passage of time promising he'd see his soulmate the next day was enough to allay thoughts of horrific unforeseen accidents.

Tonight Virgil texted his soulmate at quarter to two am and watched as the numbers changed without warning.

00:05:17

Five minutes. Virgil gulped and couldn't help but feel like he'd fucked up. He glanced at his phone several times, bewildered by the lack of an answering text, but mostly watched his wrist counting down.

At about the two-minute mark he finally realized he should probably get dressed and grabbed a pair of skinny jeans to struggle into. He struck his foot on the corner of the bed and bit his lip hard to avoid waking up his roommate. Virgil quickly shrugged on his hoodie and shoes before checking his wrist again.

00:00:10

He laughed to himself at the near deja vu feeling, walking over to the window to watch for Remus’ car in the parking lot.

To his surprise, there was a knock at the dorm door instead. Virgil jumped and rushed over to the door, cracking it open just in time to glimpse his soulmate grinning out in the hallway.

"Remus! What are you doing here?" Virgil asked in a hissing whisper, sliding out into the hallway and shutting the door as quietly as possible, "do you know what time it is?"

"Uh yeah, babe. 2 am. You're the one who sent a distress signal, what was I supposed to do?" Remus answered at his normal, too-loud volume, wrapping Virgil in a tight hug before the smaller man could answer or object.

"You coulda just told me you were alright," Virgil grumbled, hugging his soulmate back tighter anyway, "do I want to know how you got in?"

"The desk worker recognized me and let me in. Don't worry, I would only break in if mildly inconvenienced," Remus grinned, starting to pull Virgil with him down the hall, "so why are you up so late? You weren't waiting for me to croak, were you?"

Virgil started to respond but stopped before he got a syllable out. That was what he was technically doing, even if he dreaded that very thing more than anything. "I- don't make it sound like I would ever want that! I just… got worried."

Remus tugged Virgil closer to his side, "I'm okay. And I'm not going anywhere, worrywart." He waved briefly at the night guard and ushered Virgil outside, "c'mon. We're gonna fix this."

"How? You're okay tonight but what about tomorrow? How do I know you're going to be okay every night? What if-" Virgil gulped, not wanting to vocalize his worst fear.

Remus stopped just outside the door and turned to Virgil, "come on, Virgie. I always call when it's a bad day. And I haven't had one in a while."

"Yeah, but what if-"

"If I had a bad day, I'd call. C'mon. We've gotta get your mind off this," Remus murmured, pulling Virgil towards his car.

Virgil huffed but followed Remus easily enough, sliding into the passenger's seat as Remus scanned through a pile of CD cases.

“Oh my god, you still have those?” Virgil asked, a bit surprised to see his old emo collection.

“Of course I do. One of the best your-birthday presents I’ve ever gotten,” Remus giggled and picked the album he’d been looking for, “I get that you get scared. When I die you can listen to The Black Parade and mourn me, but tonight we are gonna Look Alive, Sunshine.” Remus started the car and fed the CD to the center console before backing out of the spot and zooming out of the parking lot.

Virgil hummed happily, giggling as Remus recited the initial traffic report along with Dr. Death-Defying, “I love Danger Days. Remember how you convinced the DJ at Prom to play this song?”

“How could I not? He only did it because of your pouty little baby face back then,” Remus teased, earning himself a smack on the shoulder, “what? He certainly wasn’t doing me any favors.”

“You’re an ass,” Virgil chuckled.

“I’m your ass,” Remus corrected him, headbanging along as he drove.

“So where are we headed, ass of mine?” Virgil asked just over the music, watching as streetlights and neon signs advertising closed stores flashed by.

“Nowhere special,” Remus replied carefully, pretty quickly turning into an empty parking lot and pulling into a space as far from any lights as he can.

“Yeah.. not kidding about that... Is this a bookstore?”

“Bookstore parking lot.”

“Okay, why a bookstore parking lot?”

Remus didn’t answer, just unbuckled and tried to squeeze between the front seats of the car to the back. Virgil watched in amusement until Remus managed to push himself through and got settled in the back.

“C’mon. You do this for me all the time, now it’s your turn.”

Virgil laughed and turned the key to the battery-only position in the ignition and locked the car doors before following Remus, sliding back to the back seat a touch more nimbly. He settled into Remus’ lap and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

“Thank you,” he murmured, settling in as Remus wrapped his arms around him and started singing along with the music.

“If that's the best that I could be? Then I'd be another memory. Can I be the only hope for you? Because you're the only hope for me,” Remus sang softly to Virgil, running fingers through his hair.

Virgil sniffed and sang the rest of the verse, “And if we can't find where we belong we'll have to make it on our own. Face all the pain and take it on because the only hope for me is you alone,” he tried to relax and let Remus’ presence reassure him that neither of them was going anywhere without the other, “is it weird to say I wish you were around more often?”

Remus stopped humming along with the music to hug Virgil tighter, “not weird at all, V. You’ll graduate soon and we can move in together. Then you’ll really be sick of me.” he smiled and kissed Virgil’s hair, “we’re so close to forever, love.”

Virgil sighed and began to sing along again a few songs later, “we can leave this world, leave it all behind. We can steal this car if your folks don't mind. We can live forever if you've got the time,” he buried his face in Remus’ chest, almost wishing they could just start driving tonight and never looking back.

“My pretty little heart attack in black hair dye,” Remus giggled, “you gotta finish school first so I can just kick Roman and Remy out.”

Virgil laughed at that, “as if you’d ever kick your brother out.”

“Easier done than said. I’ve lived with that asshole for far too long already,” Remus replied pointedly, “you know, we can work out transportation if you would perhaps consider moving off campus next semester.”

Virgil sat there silent in consideration. The only thing really stopping him from agreeing was the wall of anxieties over moving in with his boyfriend and living off-campus and paying rent and having to find a job in between homework and classes. It was a lot to figure out, not even considering the implications of actually moving in with his boyfriend. What if Remus did something crazy like suggesting they get married? What if everything changed and he didn’t like it or get used to it? What if nothing changed and he still woke up at 2 in the morning from dreams of Xs despite falling asleep in Remus’ arms? What if-

“Virgil- where’s your head, Stormcloud?” Virgil’s thoughts were interrupted by the question and a soft steady tapping on the back of his neck.

Virgil sighed and shook his head, “sorry. It got away from me. I kinda want this moment to last forever. It’s safe and predictable.”

“An abandoned parking lot is not life, sweetheart. Trust me, I love how safe this is. I love holding you and knowing nothing can happen to you while we’re here. But life doesn’t happen in safety. We can face it together, we always will. But we do have to go out and face it eventually,” Remus spoke softly, letting his voice mingle with the music.

“You’re here now. You’re here and real and not going anywhere. That should be enough. Why isn’t it enough?” Virgil asked in a small voice.

“Because you care. Your love isn’t limited to this moment,” Remus laughed softly, “your love has saved me before, so don’t you dare try to limit it now.”

“I- oh wow, Rem, I am so sorry,” Virgil caught himself and sighed, “I think I get it now.”

“Oh? Figure something out?” Remus asked quietly, continuing to tap on Virgil to the beat.

“I haven’t been trusting your love. I’m an asshole,” Virgil shook his head, “ of course I won’t wake up and find Xs. You love me. I’m so dumb for not trusting that because of course you’re not going anywhere.”

Remus chuckled, “now you’re getting it, V. I know you can’t help worrying, but you’ll at least let me prove it when the worries get too much?”

Virgil sat up carefully, “I didn’t want to bother you with it before. Goodness knows we both need the sleep, but I think next time, I’ll just reach out like tonight.”

Remus smiled and pulled Virgil back down, “you said it yourself. We need sleep. So sleep, mister. We’re not going anywhere until morning.”

Virgil laughed and feebly tried to push away, “nooo not in the car! At least let's go find a bed.”

“Aww but that’s no fun… unless..”

“Sleep. It’s nearly 3 am. We are gonna find a bed, either mine or yours, and go to sleep.”

“Boo,” Remus pouted but reached to unlock the car, not trusting his ability to climb back upfront.

“Love you too, boo,” Virgil grinned and leaned down to kiss Remus properly, quickly getting lost in the contact. Remus pulled him close, willing to spend the rest of the night that way until the second to last track of the album began and his speakers started blaring a distorted version of the American anthem. They broke apart, laughing together at the awkward background music. Then they managed to kiss the whole way through Vampire Money before climbing out of the back seat and back upfront.

“Alright. Let’s go home. Maybe I can convince you to make it home better from there,” Remus grinned and started up the car again, driving off towards the apartment as the CD restarted the album from the beginning.

#dukexietyweek2021 #dukexiety #remus sanders #virgil sanders #WCISYA? story #soulmate au #soulmate timers #mcr #swearing #panicking

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hydra-collector · 3 years

Text

Wrath

Ship: Platonic LAMP???? I wouldn’t really know what to call it, platonic (or romantic) Intrulogical

Characters: Logan Sanders, Patton Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Roman Sanders, Remus Sanders

TW: self-harm, suicidal thoughts, crying, blood and fairly visual description of injury

Words: 1542

Summary: “Shut up.”

The last word was uttered in a growl, Logan’s hands tugging at his new long sleeves in frustration. Patton didn’t hear him, Virgil gave a small glance before looking back over to Roman, and Roman was too invested in his debate with Patton to notice.

“I said, shut up.”

(In which Logan has an angry breakdown.)

“Shut up.”

“I said, shut up. ”

He said it louder this time, gaining the attention of the other three.

“Isn’t that kinda rude, Lo-”

“I don’t fucking care,” Logan cut Patton off. The moral side looked taken aback at his use of cursing, but didn’t say anything. Good.

“I think you’ve been plenty rude already, haven’t you, Morality?”

He refused to address Patton by his name, the cuff of his button down he was gripping cutting off the blood flow in his wrists. He straightened up, looking around at his friends.

“Do you know stupid you all sound?”

“Wow, teach-”

“Nope. None of you are allowed to say anything. I have been trying to help you for the past hour, but yet you all still refuse to listen. This problem would have been solved ages ago if you had just let me talk. You hate that, though. You hate me.”

Roman and Patton looked as if they were trying to hold back from saying something back. Logan let go of his cuff, shifting his hand so his nails could dig against his wrist. Little pricks of blood made their way out of his skin, but he didn’t dare stop.

“You all have made it very clear that you want nothing to do with me. You ignore me, interrupt me, ridicule my perfectly valid advice, villainize me for simple mistakes that I immediately fix, ignore my obvious mental health issues while you make a big deal out of each other’s slight concerns, and you,” he shot a look at Patton, “don’t respect my boundaries.”

“We-”

Patton cut himself off this time, anxiously tugging at the sleeve of his hoodie hanging down over his chest. He hadn’t deserved that gift, Logan decided.

“Maybe you’re all right. Maybe I’m not important. Virgil may be a key component of Thomas, but are you really going to pretend that Anxiety is more important than Logic?!?”

He looked around, letting the thought sink into their minds. The guilt was showing on their faces, he could tell that they felt bad, once Logan finally had the balls to call them out on it.

“Or maybe I’m just not important to you. I’m annoying, stupid, intrusive, boring, the list and insults go on, and I’m not good enough for any of you. I have tried harder. I have done everything I can to make you all listen, to make you all care, to show that I know full well how much feelings affect me in the best way that someone like me can. But you don’t want that. You don’t want anybody harder to deal with than Anxiety, you don’t want someone as useless and incompetent at I am because you refuse to make an effort to understand me, how I work, how I feel things, because I’m the problem!”

His voice was getting louder, bloody half circles drying as he shoved his finger into his chest, pointing to himself. He could feel salty tears pricking at the corners of his eyes, not making an effort to ignore them anymore.

“And look where that got us!!! Thomas is miserable because Anxiety has him staying up to ungodly hours of the night, Morality has him giving up his free time when his friends are mildly inconvenienced, and Creativity has him destroying his mental health over his self worth! I could help if you all would fucking let me!!! Virgil’s scared for Thomas’s mental health, for Roman’s mental health, for Patton’s mental health because somehow Patton destroying Thomas’s life hurts him, while I’m left here to figure this out on my own, while knowing the people who I care about hate me!!!”

It was a scream at this point, the words beginning to scratch at his throat as tears really began to fall.

“And maybe I’m not good enough!! Maybe I’m not logical enough!! Because what kind of Logic does something like this!?!?”

Logan yanked up his sleeve, tearing bandages off of numerous cut marks, sweat hitting them as their dried blood glittered underneath the light. Patton made a move to approach him, but Logan let out a sound between a hiss and a scream which scared him away well enough.

“Maybe I am defective!! I’m not GOOD enough for you, I’m not good enough for THOMAS!!! I’m USELESS, I’m-”

He cut himself off by biting down hard on his right arm, teeth breaking the skin until blood leaked out. He yanked up his other sleeve, using his nails to dig past the skin on his left arm, leaving four long, thin streaks of blood.

“Logan, stop. ”

Virgil moved forward, worry and fear showing behind his eyes. Logan just missed hitting him, using a swatting motion to get him away.

“Logan, please, we can help-”

“DIDN’T I TELL YOU TO SHUT UP?!?!” Logan’s death glare darted to Roman.

He inhaled sharply, face softening to worry as he saw the looks of fear on his friend’s faces. He took a deep breath.

“I’m sorry. I have no desire to hurt any of you. You are still my friends, so the only person I will be hurting is myself.

“I’m just… so tired. So fucking tired of being ignored, and maybe you all are right. Maybe I deserve this. The blood, the pain, the absolute misery. Maybe I need to shut up, maybe I need to never say a single irritating, useless fact ever again. Maybe I need to hurt myself. Maybe I need to let Thomas make the decision to get rid of me. Maybe I deserve all of this! Maybe you guys should hate me, despise me, never give a single shit about what I say! Maybe I should fucking die, let you use me as an outlet for your anger, each of you using your own method of torture! Maybe I shouldn’t hate any of you, just hate myself for being such a useless piece of shit!!!”

He was sobbing now. Hard, painful sobs wracking his body as what he believed the ultimate feeling of misery must be. He pulled his glasses shakily off his face with his right hand, using both hands to keep them steady.

“Well… if I’m not gonna be Logic anymore, guess I won’t need these. ”

He snapped them in half, ice lacing his voice. He dropped them to the floor, reveling in the crack that came as he shattered them with his foot.

“Lo…” Patton’s voice was quiet and scared, terrified for his friend.

“I wanna die,” Logan muttered, voice wobbly and throat hurting. He took his tie in his hand tentatively before getting a firmer grip on it.

“I wanna DIE!” he screamed, ripping the tie from his neck. The back of his neck hurt from the force, his hands hurt from the grip, his arms hurt from the cuts and biting and scratching, his chest hurt from the crying, his head hurt from the crying, his legs hurt from more cuts, his throat hurt from screaming, his mind hurt so much from his stupid, stupid emotions.

He was hurting. All the time.

“Wait, wait, Logan, no, don’t leave-”

He sunk out before Virgil could finish his sentence, setting off through the corridors quickly. Surely there would be something in the Imagination, maybe a tall building, a deep lake, a ravenous monster-

He was stopped in his tracks in the Dark Side’s living room by a strong arm, the world too blurry for him to make out obstacles in his path without his glasses. The arms- which he recognized as Remus’s due to the soft amount of fat on them- tightened around his middle as he struggled to get free, mostly just succeeding in sinking into the Dark Side’s warmth.

“Re- let- Re-”

He wasn’t able to voice much more than that due to the state of his throat. He gave up, letting himself go limp in Remus’s arms as he continued sobbing, the pain in his throat reignited with every one. He barely registered being picked up and carried through the halls, processing nothing but Remus, knowing nothing but hold on, hold on.

He was dropped onto something soft, sobs receding into whimpers. His eyes were shut, it wasn’t like there was really any point in opening them without his glasses. He felt a pang in his heart at the memory of his ripped tie falling to the floor, the blurry figure of his shattered glasses already on the ground. A new round of painful sobs wracked his body at the thought.

Warm hands surrounded his body in a thick blanket, Remus wrapping it around both of them. Logan had nearly forgotten what physical contact was like, the warmth and the burning bleeding comfort into him. Remus’s arms squished around his soft belly, holding him close and tight.

He was still angry. At himself, at the others, even at Remus. But he couldn’t bring himself to give an ounce of care as he sunk into the much needed hug.

Taglist: @bluerosesbleedred @mxxangel

#logan sanders #logan angst #intrulogical #platonic intrulogical #patton sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #remus sanders #ts logan #ts patton #ts virgil #ts roman #ts remus #ts fic #sanders sides fic #grays fics

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thefoulbeast · 4 years

Text

A little bit good deal of character analysis in regards to Saburota Todou in the Kyoto arc. This is for my own benefit bc I’m writing smth involving him...

Skipping over the 1st appearance in ch16 because it didn’t really have what I was looking for. Instead I’m skipping straight over to ch25 where Tatsuma shows up and they fight.

This got. Very Long And Very Rambly. So uh, yeah.

tw for canon typical violence and gore

So - Todou already has considerable enhanced physical abilities and regeneration before Karura. Granted, not as strong, but still there.

(man i wish i could do backflips like that when im 56 lmao)

He’s been planning this whole fiasco for over 10 years now (Myou Dha joined the order 10 years ago, and that’s when he first started on manipulating Mamushi)... I wonder how long he’s been eating demons and stuff? How did that even start? How many has he gone through over time? Things to ponder...

Anyways, my biggest question here is... what the fuck is up with his pain tolerance?

He’s straight up getting barbecued and all he has to say is, “I can’t heal fast enough!“ He doesn’t even look a little distraught. Just mildly inconvenienced by the whole thing. (Also - what kind of knife is that? The shape & handle is really funky :O)

I think he was originally intending to like. Eat Karura as soon as it showed up but he had Impure King as a last resort in case he couldn’t overpower Tatsuma (as was the case). The guy really did all his research and had a lot of back ups planned huh.

...I also want to know just how he managed to find out all the stuff regarding the Impure King. How exactly did he know that it hadn’t been destroyed completely? How did he know about Kurikara being empty? And the deal between Karura and the Head Priests?

Sir please cite your sources I’m so curious...

Back on track though! Stuff happens, Tatsuma gets it in the neck with the weird knife, Todou’s all healed up from those nasty burns again and it’s all dandy.

And then we get straight up fire eating.

Again... that should hurt, no? That’s mouth, throat, oesophagus and probably tracheal burns. And Todou just... doesn’t care. He’s still as calm and collected as before, no indication of discomfort. Personally? I’m unnerved by this lol.

The closest we get to discomfort is this when he groans a lil bit after he’s done eating but I think that’s more the stomach upset. From this point on I guess we assume he doesn’t feel pain from fire... but I’m still squinting at everything before this...

Adding this purely because I love these panels. This guy is so messed up. So very very messed up lol.

[Skip forward everything Im not interested in right now]

Someone is having a bit of a bellyache. This is why we don’t eat things while they’re still alive, sir!

But upset stomach or not, he’s still??

“Yeah it’s fine - hello yukio how have you been? - yes, I’m ready to throw hands with you; pain who?“

also... he may be a Huge bastard but I absolutely love how!! Polite he is!!

“Thanks for cooperating ^w^“ <- Todou after cutting off Yukio’s escape route with a wall of flame. lol. However he got evasive when Yukio asked: “What the hell are you?“

He seems to happily give out tidbits of non-vital information, but he obviously knows when to keep his mouth shut (10+ years spying on True cross and no one knew? This guy is very clever! Very tricky! Many secrets!)

I’m sorry this whole thing is so funny... Small, polite talk during fighting is exactly the kind of unhinged I expected from him and he did not disappoint in the slightest. Bless. (I mean he does admit that he’s only doing it to rile Yukio up a few pages later... but still... This man knows just how to get under people’s skin and is so very good at it...)

Also I love how this fight reveals so much about his character so subtly?? I honestly just rec ch28 for p much most anyone would need to get a feel of him as a character.

He’s got this new body and these new powers and the first thing he does is fight a teenager for shits and giggles. Except both the teenager and the younger body keep reminding him of his own youth.

Lower right panel... his face says they’re not happy memories. (In my very biased opinion I would call that expression a mix of “oh whoopsie” and “these memories literally make me want to die”) (And oh Boy does it go well with ch106 pages 23-26 where we actually see how the Todou brothers interacted with each other and that is So Much To Unpack i dont even know where to start lol)

And then right after remarking that family is a sore spot for Yukio, he immediately goes “lmao me too I get it“ ( it’s actually ”Heh heh heh! I feel such a connection between us! Asleep or awake, you’re always hung up on your family! I understand. I used to be the same way.“)

And then finally I reach the part that originally made me want to re-read his scenes in the Kyoto arc...

Todou literally getting his brains blown out with water type bullets 😍😍😍 This is literally the only instance of him admitting that something hurt that I could find so far! What the hell! But that’s not all!

Even then he’s still smiling! He’s still playing around! He got shot through the head, said “oh ouchie“ and immediately shook it off and kept trying rile Yukio up like nothing had happened. Pretty fucked up in my humble opinion, not gonna lie.

“Ah yes I’ve sustained a horrific facial wound let me just dab at it with a handkerchief for a bit that’ll do it.“

He does underestimate Yukio though, becaue he doesn’t see the naiads coming at all. But even with the whole water prison, it bothers him for a few seconds and he’s back on track. He’s very... I’m not sure if tenacious is the right word, but perhaps diligent? Goal oriented?

Very hard to knock off balance, that’s for sure! And even if you manage to catch him by surprise, he seems to adapt very quickly. He’s just genuinely fighting Yukio to have a good time and doesn’t see him as a serious opponent.

But the chilling bit is that he was going to kill Yukio, just like that. He got a feel for his new abilities, had some fun at the expense of Yukio’s emotional state, reminisced on his past for a bit... and that would have been it, if not for the Satan-eyes.

Anyways this got so much longer than I wanted it to lol and I managed to fry my brain so I’ll leave off here. Maybe I’ll do smth aditional later maybe I wont. But just know that I am screaming about this unhinged bastard like 24/7 ❤

Idk if anyone even got to the end of this but I wanted to put my thoughts down somewhere I could find them later lol. Thanks xoxo

#ao no exorcist #ane #saburota todo #character analysis #the written words #saburouta toudou

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hetawrite · 4 years

Note

Hello how are you to day? Good, good. If you can could you do some hetalia headcanons for the main 8 (not including America or including him if you want to) as well as Prussia, Romano, Spain, and Canada that have a American S/O that uses a lot of Meme slang (like Yeet or Salty or Shook or Mood you get the picture) and the countries are just like 'WTF are they saying?!' and because of it they have to try and explain it, Key word TRY. Sorry if this is to long, thanks for read this have a good day.

My day is good, thanks. I think I quite enjoy writing headcanons like this. And no problem for a long ask. Just means you have something more specific in mind!

1p!England

"I am shooketh"

Pardon? You were drinking some hot chocolate, reading on your phone. He'd ask if you were alright. His mind would assume you’re scared, or got shivers from a ghost walking through you.

“Did you just have an Encounter?”

This man is high-strung so don’t laugh otherwise he’ll be offended and get rude. What an absolute brat.

It’s meme slang, you tell him. “Love, I deal with enough slang on a regular basis. We don’t need any more.”

This guy is vaguely aware as he is exposed to America quite often and he himself is a London aware of changing tides, but he’s then he deems it ‘Improper’ and implores you not to use it too often.

1p!France

“He is being salty.”

He doesn’t know how to take this. That man on the TV is being irritating, but he can’t comprehend what you mean.

This man is helpless with technology. If you show him the word meme, he will say “mee-mees”. He is uncultured in the ways of the internet.

You explain, and he just nods, but he doesn’t understand. He comprehend, but doesn’t understand. Barely ever.

This man basically embodies ‘old dogs can’t learn new tricks’.

1p!Canada

“You’re such a simp.”

“Only for you.” Awww, Canada, baby.

Of course he knows. This boy is young in comparison to every other personification and he goes on the internet.

He isn’t one for speaking in slang normally, only when someones being extra cringe or dissing someone. Boy is cultured but sassy.

He also has a folder of memes. Mostly saved from America, but now he knows you’ll understand them and won’t cringe at him, you will now get them when you’re apart. He wants to make you smile and if memes are the way to get deeper into your heart then so be it. America is literally supplying him with the hottest memes out there for free.

1p!Russia

“Cash me outside, how ‘bout that?”

He recognises it. It doesn’t click in his brain, but he remembers America shouting it at some point. Just like you’re doing because he inconvenienced you. Please don’t fight him.

You can show it to him, but he isn’t all that interested. Internet culture doesn’t interest him. He doesn’t follow trends and only got Facebook because America insisted on making him an account. The dude only has a laptop for work and his phone has basically no app. His highest used is Tetris.

He’ll recognise things you say, but will mostly just give you a judging stare. Or maybe chuckle if you make a fool of yourself.

1p!China

“Yeet!”

Calm down, you’re being way too energetic about throwing that into the bin.

He deals with all of his siblings at home, and then America at Big Work Meetings. He does not want to have it from you.

This man needs chillness in his life, consistency. He hates hecticness. So you throwing shit and shouting will get on his nerves before he tells you to pack it in.

Yeah, he’s too grouchy for this stuff.

1p!Italy

“Is this a bird?”

“That’s a butterfly...” He doesn’t get it. He has watched a few animes, that’s what happens when you’re friends with Japan. And America. And Prussia. And also Romano because it’s his guilty pleasure so he may catch on to what you’re saying.

He’ll also understand other memes you say, but he doesn’t find them themselves funny. He just actually enjoys watching your expressions to it and your enthusiasm.

He works off other peoples happiness, so seeing that grin of yours whilst you imitate gives him the butterflies in his stomach.

He will try though to pepper some in if you are a user of memes in your language. He wants to pick them up to make you smile. He’s such a cutie-pie UwU.

1p!Germany

“Ah yes, stonks.”

No, these are the finances, honey. They’re not-oh... now he’s slightly disappointed as he looks at you from over his glasses.

Prussia is energetic about his memes, and Germany will often be ‘gifted’ with them. Sometimes, he’ll read through them but often he’ll scroll through them all. His brother spams. Heavily.

You may get lucky sometimes if it’s an animal meme to make him smile, or exhale sharply through his nose, but Germany doesn’t often find them funny.

Like Italy, he’ll smile if your positively thrilled with it.

1p!Japan

“That is a juicy boy.”

Oh, thank you, s/o. He’s happy you’re enjoying the meal he made you.

He knows memes. This man watches anime. He has every social media account on all platforms. He will smile, he will partake in some fine dining that is the dank meme section of the internet.

They’re mostly the anime version of a meme. He doesn’t really enjoy edgy humour, and while a Danny DeVito meme about magnum dong is mildly humorous, it just isn’t his sip of tea.

He’ll say memes out-loud in the same room as you sometimes, in that deadpan voice of his, which always makes it ten times funnier. Even his commentary of anime that you’re watching a rerun of will have memes in it. And if you say you’re watching an anime and got to this specific episode, you bet he’ll pull up his neatly made folders on his phone for that anime and send it. He appreciates that you like that type of humour.

1p!Prussia

“That is a sweaty boi.”

Dat boi? Dat boi! Prussia is a people pleaser at heart and a goofball so of course he knows memes. This man has a large following on the internet, he makes a living off people enjoying his content!

As soon as you spill the proverbial bag of you liking memes, he will spam. His line of thinking is often, “Hahaha, this is hilarious. S/o may also find this funny. I will send it to them!” And if there’s one meme on that website with him scrolling hours at a time, you will get sent at least like 30 in an hour.

He will try his darnedest to make you laugh, so you will get a specific meme made about anyone you know too just to see you in tears over it.

“I have an army.” He sends you a picture of England. “We have a Germany.” Yeah, it’s that MCU meme of Loki and RDJ... Sometimes he’s not that funny, but A+ for effort!

1p!Romano

“One does not simply--”

Yeah, he knows what you;re going to say and rolls his eyes. If it’s anything too cringe, he will laugh at you and take the piss. But he will not hesitate to make an edgy or self deprecating meme.

Romano is ‘do as I say, not as I do’ type of person, and also never call him out for his hypocrisy. He will get snooty with you.

But he does enjoy them even though it doesn’t seem like it. He enjoys seeing you happy about them so as long as you’re shameless and don’t take his elbow digging to heart it’s all fine.

Don’t call him out for laughing at whatever meme you say or send, as he will get defensive and annoyed with you. Imagine edgy teenager ‘I’m not like everyone else!’.

1p!Spain

“Pepe the frog.”

He partakes in a bit of memeing. He enjoys it. He’s got you.

But boy does he like the incomprehensible ones. Where the pictures highly saturated and has a couple of nonsense words put across it not lined up. He is cracking up at it.

Normal ones are fine too, but it’s either Facebook mum ones or weird incomprehensible. No in between. He doesn’t get that deep on the internet to understand the ones with context.

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casebasket · 5 years

Text

Since I absolutely cannot stop thinking about Good Omens, the blessed show, I’m just going to list my favourite things that endlessly swirl inside my mind:

Crowley spends 6000 years tracking Aziraphale so he can swoop in and save his angelic dumbass every time he gets himself into trouble for some crepes and books or when he’s mildly - (mildly!) - inconvenienced or distressed

Aziraphale almost dies for crepes and wow what a mood, what a relatable god damn dumbass, and all Crowley can do is smile

clearly, Crowley’s considered Aziraphale his friend, his best friend, over the span of six millennia, even when time and time again Aziraphale denies it because he’s fallen so hard in self denial, which speaks to the immense patience Crowley must have, specifically for his angel. Crowley knows Aziraphale likes him, possibly even loves him, even when Aziraphale won’t admit it to himself. Even so, he’s still particularly pleased whenever Aziraphale is happy being with him, to see proof of their companionship

Crowley keeps urging Aziraphale to run off together and he just says it outright, all the time, they’re on their own side, it’s the two of them, they’re basically a couple, we’RE BEST FRIENDS, and he never runs off by himself

every time Crowley says any of those things, Aziraphale is shocked by his affection and starts to smile before Angelic Purpose and Ineffable Plans or whatever kicks in and he’s all I DON’T EVEN LIKE YOU but he does and he has for 6000 years, dumbass

the gigantic heart eyes Aziraphale throws at Crowley, constantly, whether it’s saving his dumbass, his dumbass books, his dumbass jacket, his dumbass shakespeare, etc., that he thinks are subtle but he’s clearly gazing longingly. he looks so pleased!!

Crowley saves Aziraphale’s books and while he’s holding them and looking at Crowley longingly a romantic string quartet plays in the background???

the absolute happiness on Aziraphale’s face when he sensed Crowley behind him while he was imprisoned for crepes

“you go too fast for me, Crowley” woah, dumbass hits home, hurts everyone’s souls, turns table on sunglasses dumbass,

the sadness, almost grief, when he says those words - Crowley has probably always known he loved Aziraphale (and hates that fact but begrudgingly accepts) but Aziraphale has never been ready to accept it, and even when he begins to their diametrically opposed circumstance prohibits him from accepting it, regardless of how many times Crowley’s shown his affection, how steadfast he is in their friendship. In some ways, Crowley will always be miles ahead of Aziraphale, who tends to stay put and delight in his old books, old clothes, hide in old virtues.

and wow Crowley’s super soft when Aziraphale gives him the holy water, and he doesn’t know how to react at all when Aziraphale sadly, softly mutters those words

I can’t BELIEVE his threat to Crowley is that he’ll never talk to him again while holding a god damn flaming smiting sword, and Crowley regards that as more threatening than the god damn flaming smiting sword, and stops time itself just so Aziraphale will still pay attention to him, like how flippin whipped can you get

alternatively, Aziraphale saw the slight flinch when he raised his sword at Crowley and immediately put it back down and threatened him with something equally if not more effective

Crowley literally crying to Aziraphale because he lost him, and all Aziraphale says is a slightly uncomfortable “I’m sorry to hear that”, as if he doesn’t quite believe he’s the source of Crowley’s grief because how could he be? but also he 100% knows its about him, Crowley grieves for him, and in the moment he couldn’t take it, resorts to platitudes, clamming up and not thinking about how much Crowley loves him, how much he loves him back. demon, angel, dumbass denial.

Crowley walks out of the flaming bookshop, thinking his best friend has died, and “Somebody to Love” plays in the background LMAO

Aziraphale experiencing his own frantic sense of loss when he witnesses the angels dragging Crowley away

Aziraphale happily dancing the gavotte. what a dork. gay

Crowley basically pole dancing with a gigantic pin. also gay

Aziraphale so angry and scared about Crowley and holy water, about Crowley possibly dying forever, that they don’t meet for another century, and they only see each other again because Aziraphale is getting killed by nazis and Crowley can’t let that happen. And then Crowley saves him and his dumb books and after that Aziraphale gives him holy water next time so Crowley wouldn’t get hurt when he tries getting it himself

their respective human ‘agent’ is the same idiot. dumbasses

they had absolutely no hand in raising Adam, who turned out fine. the one they did raise, on the other hand, is kind of an asshole. lol they’re so dumb

Aziraphale’s puppy face when he tries to implore Crowley to do something. it’s disgusting how effective it is. Crowley is weak.

Crowley claims to hate Aziraphale’s human magic shows but he’s also exasperatedly fond when he watches it. WEAK

Aziraphale is a DORK and Crowley LOVES IT. WEAK!!

Aziraphale did a stupid thing giving away the fire sword and shaded him from rain and Crowley’s dumbass has loved him since

“you’re so clever! how can anyone as clever as you be so stupid?” Crowley calling Aziraphale out on his denying dumbass

‘angel’ is a pet name

people rightfully mistaken them as dumb husbands

Crowley basically breaks up with him and Aziraphale stands there on the side walk, devastated

they don’t say thank you, they just take each other out to meals

laughing together

Crowley worries over what Azirapahle thinks of his name. He cares about that detail. “You don’t like it?”

Crowley says “you can stay at my place if you like” with such hope in his voice, what a soft dumbass

Crowley smiles when Aziraphale slips up and says stuff like “let me tempt you” or “i’ll be damned”. Aziraphale smiles whenever Crowley is nice.

Aziraphale has his bookstore full of the things he loves for him to indulge in, Crowley has his bentley full of Queens music for him to escape. One stands still, the other rides fast. One is sentiment for human things heaven cares not for, the other is a sort of freedom from hell. Both feels safe, are shared with only the other, and when set on fire, are mourned.

they go on lunch dates like all the time and gaze at each other, softly.

“i know what YOU smell like!” he knows what he smells like

Crowley calls him a bastard and Aziraphale just gives him a shyly pleased look. He’s so pleased, the soft dumbass

so i guess like, the entire show

in conclusion i believe you can interpret their love in any myriad of ways, romantic, platonic, eternally entwined, transcendent of any of our human labels, all encompassing, every love imaginable, all at once. They love each other, and they’re probably in love with each other, whatever that means to them, in the sense that it will always be the two of them against whatever else. In the whole universe, they’ve got each other. They’re stupidly fond of each other, to a point beyond their understanding of the world.

also they’re a pair of dumbasses

update when I think of more

edit update:

whenever the burned bookshop is brought up Crowley is immediately on high alert softness, ready to console and hug and picking up on aziraphale’s every reaction trying to make him feel better, SOFT

#good omens #good omens aziraphale #good omens crowley #aziraphale and crowley #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #crowley #text #they're so stupid and i love them #1k #2k

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schism-au-blog · 3 years

Text

Chapter 11

The ship docked outside of the zoo. A pink bubble surrounded Pearl and Pink, which wooshed them down to the zoo’s landing dock for smaller ships. A pair of Jaspers was guarding the door to the zoo. Before Pink’s bubble arrived, they had been laughing with each other, but now they stood straight upright. They both diamond saluted.

“Welcome, My Diamond,” they said in unison.

Pink pushed down the urge to thank them and strode past them as if they didn’t exist. She headed to the room where the Rose Quartzes were held. Fire Agate came rushing up to Pink Diamond. “What are you here for today, My Diamond?” she asked.

“I’m here for the Rose Quartzes,” Pink said. “Yellow and I thought they may be of some use yet.”

“Ah, of course, my Diamond,” said Fire Agate. “Do you need any assistance from me?”

“No,” said Pink. “You are dismissed.”

“Yes, my Diamond,” Fire diamond saluted once again and stood still while Pink strode forward. Pink went to the Rose Quartz room and pulled down three bubbles. “Do you think these will be alright?” she asked Pearl.

Pearl glanced at the Jaspers guarding the door pointedly. “Of course my Diamond. Your choice is excellent, as always.”

Pink mentally scolded herself for letting her guard down. She gave the bubbles to Pearl, who put them in her gem. Pink left the human zoo and went back to her ship. Once they were back on the ship and heading to Earth, Pink sighed. “Sorry, Pearl.”

“It’s ok,” Pearl said. “I understand what we need to do to keep the crystal gems going.”

“I wish I didn’t have to treat anyone like that,” Pink said. “But I’ll get in trouble if I ‘interact with those below my station.’” She sighed. “Now I can’t wait to get back to the palanquin.”

Pearl nodded. “I’m excited to meet them.”

“I wish I could show them my real self and not my diamond self.”

“Last we knew they were loyal to Homeworld,” Pearl said sadly. “They’d probably tell Yellow and Blue.”

“I know,” said Pink, “But I still wish there was some way to be closer to them. I feel like it would somehow make up for everything they’ve been through. I know that’s absurd, but some part of me still wishes-”

“I know,” said Pearl. “You wish you could be kinder to them than they’ll expect, but it would put everyone involved in danger. Is it not kinder to keep them safe, even if they’re slightly inconvenienced by your presence?”

“I suppose,” said Pink. “I just wish I could do more.”

“You’re doing so much already!” said Pearl.

Pink sighed. “I suppose. How close are we?”

“Almost there, my Diamond.”

Pink smiled hesitantly. “I hope they’ll be happy.”

“I’m sure they will be, my Diamond.”

Pink saw the Earth come into view. The ship landed on the ground and docked. Pearl and Pink disembarked.

Pink smiled and ran over to the warp. As soon as Pearl stepped onto it, Pink activated it. She made sure to stand straight and tall as she headed back to her palanquin.

Pink looked behind her to make sure the curtain was closed, then she knelt on the ground. “Pearl?”

“Yes, my Diamond.” Pearl pulled the bubbles out of her head.

Pink reached a finger out and popped all three of them sequentially.

“You should probably stand up, my Diamond,” Pearl suggested. “It’s proper.”

“Thank you, Pearl,” said Pink, and stood as the Roses reformed.

The Roses looked around in shock until their eyes settled on Pink. They all diamond saluted.

Pink straightened up. “You have been unbubbled due to recent developments in the war. From now on, you answer to me, and you do not leave this palanquin. Yellow Diamond and myself have deemed you of possible use. However, you are in the same batch as the rebel leader, and are therefore considered defective. Therefore, any misstep will be considered a grave offense and will be punished accordingly.”

“Yes, my Diamond,” they all chanted in unison.

“Good,” Pink said. She felt horrible. They all looked so scared. Her brow furrowed in concern.

“Is something wrong, my Diamond?” the Rose with her gem on her cheek, asked.

Pink shook her head. “No, I am just concerned. It is nothing for you to worry about.”

“What do you need us to do, my Diamond?” another one asked. She had her gem on her hip.

“Nothing, at the moment,” Pink said. “Yellow Diamond and I want to see if you have healing powers like the rebel Rose Quartz. They could prove useful.” Pink looked at the Roses with concern. There was no way they could relax at all with her around. But she didn’t want to leave them alone again. She had an idea. “I have something I must tend to by myself. Pearl, stay here.”

Pearl looked surprised for a moment, then realization dawned on her face. “Yes, my Diamond.” She diamond saluted.

Pink left the palanquin and went to the moon base to observe the metallic gems.

When Pink left, Pearl relaxed. She smiled. “Welcome back.”

The third Rose, with her gem on the back of her hand looked mildly surprised. “If we’re considered ‘defective’ and ‘dangerous,’ why would Pink Diamond leave us alone with her Pearl?”

“My Diamond knows that you know you’ll be shattered if you even try to attack me,” said Pearl. She hated having to play the part as much as Pink, but she had to make this believable. “Plus, I can always be replaced.”

“Are you going to tell her if we, you know, relax a little?” Cheek Rose asked.

“No,” answered Pearl. “In my experience, she won’t ask, and I know better than to speak out of turn.”

“So, how long has it been since we’ve been bubbled?” asked Hip Rose.

“Approximately five hundred and forty-eight years,” said Pearl.

“So we’re always going to be treated like rebels just because someone else in our batch decided to go rogue?” Hip Rose asked the other Roses angrily.

“We have to understand that the Diamonds’ decisions are far more important than our individual happiness,” Hand Rose said. “They have good reason to believe our cut is defective. We should be grateful we aren’t shards.”

“I suppose,” said Cheek Rose. “It still feels like we’re being held captive, doing jobs we’d be glad to do anyway.”

Hip Rose rolled her eyes. “I’d be willing to shatter that rebel Rose, just for ruining all of our good names.”

“I’d be glad to do it if I was ordered to,” said Hand Rose, “But I’d rather let Pink Diamond have the honor. She’s had to go through so much because of this rebel Rose Quartz.”

“Pink Diamond shouldn’t have to get her hands dirty like that!” Cheek Rose exclaimed. “She’s a Diamond, she’s too graceful for that.”

Hip Rose nodded. “I suppose, but if I were her, I’d do it, protocol or no protocol.”

“That’s why she’s a Diamond and you’re not,” said Hand Rose. “The diamonds have a grace and dignity that we could never imagine.”

Pearl smiled. She thought of the amount of times she’d seen Rose fall flat on her face. Rose was clumsy and sweet and didn’t care what anyone else thought of her. Pearl suddenly realized why no one suspected Pink of being Rose. Everyone thought so highly of the diamonds that thinking of someone so carefree, so kind, so accepting, someone doing everything completely antithetical to what the diamonds were supposed to do, as a Diamond was completely outlandish.

She supposed Pink could be graceful, but it always seemed more of an accident than anything else. When she was trying to be graceful, she always ended up messing something up. It was nice. It seemed like Pearl knew her better than anyone else. Pearl started to wonder when Pink would come back. The quartzes had a chance to get to know each other. It didn’t seem like they were too upset, considering everything that had happened to them. Trying to convert them to the Crystal Gems seemed like an impossible task, however. They had too much bitterness at Rose for their situation, not that Pearl could blame them.

Pearl realized that she hadn’t been listening to the Roses for the past few minutes. She tried to zone back into their conversation.

“So I guess we’ll have to get to know each other well,” said Cheek Rose. “We can’t go anywhere else, and it seems like Pink Diamond will be in and out.”

“Not that we could be close with her,” Hand Rose added. “We’d never be able to offer anything valuable to her.”

“Of course,” said Cheek Rose, “but we could watch her. I’m sure watching her in motion is absolutely incredible.”

“We probably wouldn’t understand half of what she does,” said Hand Rose.

“And if we did, we might be accused of spying for the Crystal Gems,” said Hip Rose.

“Pink Diamond would never wrongly accuse us!” said Hand Rose.

“I mean, the Diamonds did order us all bubbled for being in the same batch as the rebel leader,” said Cheek Rose. “Not that I’m doubting the diamonds,” she added quickly. She sighed. “What if we are defective?”

Hip Rose smiled. “Then we’re defective together.”

“And we can still do our very best to serve the Diamonds,” said Hand Rose. “It doesn’t matter if we’re defective if we keep ourselves accountable.”

“Besides, it’s not like we could do any real damage,” said Hip Rose. “She’s easily replaceable,” she said, gesturing at Pearl. “And if you really think that three quartzes could scratch a Diamond, I think you’re terribly mistaken.”

Cheek Rose smiled.

Pink Diamond pulled back the curtain to her Palanquin. The Roses immediately straightened up and saluted.

“Pearl,” Pink said. “Follow me.”

“Yes, my Diamond.” Pearl followed behind Pink to the warp.

Pink and Pearl warped back near a crystal gem base. Pink shifted into Rose.

“Do you want to talk about the Roses or get Garnet, Cherry, and Desert Glass to discuss the metallic gems?” Rose asked.

“I think we should talk about the Roses first,” Pearl said.

Rose nodded. “Let’s find a private room. I’m very curious as to what they had to say.” she started running to the crystal gems’ base.

Pearl followed Rose. They arrived at the crystal gem base and walked to a private room.

Pearl sighed. “Please don’t leave me alone with them again.”

“Oh no!” Rose exclaimed. “Was it that bad?”

Pearl nodded. “I think we tend to forget how Pearls are treated by Homeworld gems. I was an object, a piece of furniture.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Rose said. “I keep thinking that every gem would be a crystal gem if they had a chance. I completely forget that they’d act like you weren’t even there.”

“It’s ok,” Pearl said. “I learned a lot about them.”

“Are you sure?” Rose asked. “You seem upset.”

“No, I was completely on board with the idea when you said it,” Pearl reminded her. “I can tell you what they talked about. They were mostly mad at you, Rose, and talked about how you should be shattered and how unfair it was they were bubbled for so long.”

“That’s fair,” said Rose. “I mean, imagine if they knew I wasn’t even a Rose Quartz. That they were bubbled for nothing.”

“They seemed pretty loyal to Pink Diamond,” said Pearl. “I think they’d be very conflicted.”

“So am I,” said Rose, “so I don’t blame them at all. Did they say anything else?”

“Not really. They seem to be getting along pretty well. I think that they’ll be happy, at least for a while.”

“That’s good,” said Rose. “Shall we go talk to Garnet, Cherry, and Desert Glass?”

Pearl nodded. “Yes. I’ll tell you if I think of anything else.”

Rose smiled and strode out of the room. Pearl followed behind. They found Garnet, Cherry, and Desert, and asked them to meet in a planning room that night.

Taglist: @suartz

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