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safe-by-dawn · 10 months

Text

~Obsessive Lover~

Ticci Toby Ver./ Kinks, Fetishes, and other Head-canons

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A/N: Starting a small series to kick off the blog. Currently taking requests, so drop a name and I'll tell you what kind of lover I think they are.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

NSFW under the cut! MDNI!

Toby is definitely an undercover pervert, and you'd never know the amount of times he sneaks a peek at you any chance he gets. He adores stalking any social media you have, saving your pictures to any device he can get his hands on even before you make anything official with him. Loves taking pictures of you when you're not paying any attention for material for later.

Sneaks into your room and steals anything that smells like you. At first it threw you off, but being the sick individual that you are, it started to intrigue you when some of your things wound up missing and for awhile you couldn't figure out why some of your favorite underwear wound up missing.

That is until you finally got with Toby for the first time and found a pair under his pillow.

This man loves to stare.

Even before you started your relationship with him.

You bend to get something and his eyes are glued onto your ass until you raise back up. You notice that he does it after some time, even going as far as wearing low-cut shirt and leaning into him just to get his eyes on you and watch the way he drinks you in.

It's intoxicating, you can feel his eyes burning through you anytime you're in the same room together, it's one of the things that drew you to him in the first place.

He's a very touchy lover, despite probably not being a big fan of touch from anybody else, but he just can't get enough. Expect to be groped and have his hands on you at any point in time.

He was taken in as a proxy super young, so the sheer pent up sexual aggression he has is unmatched after not having a chance in his youth with other women. You'd never know that until you got in the sheets with him though.

He adores the way your face turns a pretty red when he wraps his hands around your throat mid-fuck.

Toby has no knowledge of pain and sometimes can't gauge it on someone else so he definitely needs someone that can handle a beating in bed. You'll be left with bruising and scratches for weeks.

Loves biting and nibbling on you to hear any sound that comes from you due to it. It just drives him on until you're a bruised up mess under him.

A sadistic lover as well, loves watching you cry from it all being too much. Too much pain as well as too much pleasure at the same time can be a combo that absolutely tears you apart but he just knows if you didn't like it you wouldn't keep coming back to him for more.

The more confident he gets the less his stutter comes out, You can't convince me otherwise. It was very prominent early on in your relationship, lacing its way into almost every sentence, but as he gets more comfortable and knowing that you're not there as some sick joke, it still comes but he can form his sentences a little better.

Which also means that when his ego spikes from having you as a writhing mess under him, his mouth is absolutely dripping with seductive tease. It's like a switch flips inside of him, throwing you for a loop when he whispers the most vile things into your ear while he's balls deep.

Loves to call you his, going as far to whisper "Mine" in your ear when in close proximity to him. Calls you some of the best pet names around every one around you because he wants everyone to know what's his.

Loves when you show the bruises he gave you, prefers when you don't try to cover them up. Going as far as trying to wipe off the concealer on your throat that covers up the most recent one that he gave you when you do attempt to cover them up.

And if anyone else so much as thinks to lay a hand on you, he already has their hand in a vice grip, and then he fucks you later to solidify that you belong to him.

Toby is possessive as hell, and once you're finally his you're not getting out of it alive.

#ticci toby #toby rogers #ticci toby x reader #creepypasta smut #headcanons #ticci toby x reader smut #Lovers series #toby rogers x reader #creepypasta x reader #creepypasta

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squishytenya · 1 month

Note

Hey Do you remeber your Tenya and Aizawa ask, with y/n Crying? What about some of the other casts like Katsuki or Ejiro?

if you dont mind please and thank you

They Make You Cry Headcanons

I lowkey had to search my own blog for this but I found it! thanks for the request <3

Pairings - Bakugou x gn!reader, Kirishima x gn!reader + Kaminari x gn!reader

Warnings - arguments, cursing, crying

Katsuki Bakugou

▹part of being in a relationship with Katsuki is dealing with his harsh personality. Even if he does calm down the older he gets, it's still probably not to the same extent of a normal human being.

▹he probably would be completely speechless the moment you started crying after an argument - straight up would not know how to respond to that.

▹his eyes would go wide and he would go to take a step towards you and then bring himself back, holding his arm to himself.

▹"hey... don't do that"

▹for all his faults Katsuki is, deep inside, a good person and he knows this is the kind of shit you lose relationships from and he really really doesn't want to lose you.

▹ but he does know he can be a bit much and he probably takes a while to come down from whatever he's feeling so he just kinda leaves for a few minutes

▹ he comes back with a cup of tea and perches gently on the bed next to you, avoiding eye contact

▹he would do his best to spit out an apology, but it's not something that would come naturally to him. Seeing your face crumple like it did is still replaying in his mind and he knows he has to fix this somehow - so he does his best to explain himself

▹eventually he would just stop rambling and take your hand in his, squeezing it gently.

▹"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that to you"

▹ he'd just sit by you, hand in his until you were ready to talk to him and talk over what had led to the argument in the first place and he really does take your words to heart about what upset you

▹he'd try to cut down on raising his voice and try to cut out teasing nicknames entirely, unless he knew you were okay with them already

▹a sweet guy really

Eijirou Kirishima

▹I cannot see Kiri upsetting you on purpose, even during an argument he isn't the type to yell or get super angry with you

▹him making you cry is most likely a complete accident on his part, or even him accidentally playing into an insecurity you have without properly thinking about it

▹when your relationship first started out, I think he probably didn't understand you might not be comfortable with the things he's comfortable with, especially during social situations

▹ also probably doesn't understand others might read his kindness as flirting, so when you two are invited to a hero party to socialise and he pretty much ignored you the whole night, he had no idea why you began tearing up on the way home

▹obviously, he's worried about why you're crying and what he did! and how he can fix it is at the forefront of his mind almost immediately after noticing

▹and when you explain it to him, he pretty much crumbles straight away - he is in disbelief that he made you feel that way

▹he falls over himself explaining that he didn't mean to make you feel that way, he was just overwhelmed by the pressure of hero society and got caught up

▹Kiri is very good at admitting when he is wrong, and puts a lot of effort into having healthy communication in his relationships - platonic or otherwise

▹pulls over the car literally just so he can hold both of your hands in his and make eye contact as he explains his actions, specifically so you understand he's being genuine

▹"I'd never do that to you on purpose, you're the most important person to me"

▹after your sniffles have subsided, he pulls you into a hug and promises never to do something like that again - and you bet he keeps his promise!!!

▹takes you to get food too, just as an extra apology and you sit in the car park eating ice cream together - he makes sure you're the center of his attention the entire time <3

Denki Kaminari

▹oh he's so stupid. he's so lovely, but so, so stupid.

▹honestly he probably says something insanely embarrassing in front of your friends and pays no attention to how that might make you feel, especially if you're close to these people

▹doesn't even notice when the room goes completely silent and nobody is talking but him, it takes one of his friends clearing their throat for him to notice your eyes filling with tears

▹in his defense, he does try to explain himself straight away and takes you into another room to have the conversation (at the very least) but it takes a little bit more explaining to him why his actions would upset you

▹doesn't really get it at first but you explaining, and your face as you cry, makes his heart hurt and he tries to rectify his actions as soon as he can

▹the first thing he thinks to do in that moment is bundle you up in his arms and rock the both of you back and forth to calm you down, which works a little more than you'd like to admit

▹runs his hands over your back, up and down, until your breathing evens out - does not give a shit about anyone outside of you two in that moment

▹once you've stopped crying, full on apology - hands and knees!

▹he seems genuinely heartbroken to have embarrassed you and takes full responsibility for what he did

▹ kicks everyone else out of the house and spends the rest of the evening making it up to you and reminding you of how important you are to him and just how sorry he is

I hope these were good! I haven't written in ages so this'll be the first comeback headcanons, hope you guys enjoyed it <3

#bnha imagine #bnha x reader #bnha headcanons #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugou x reader #bakugou imagine #kirishima x reader #kirishima imagine #eijirou kirishima imagine #kaminari x reader #kaminari imagine #denki kaminari x reader

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jasntodds · 3 months

Text

Petrichor [16]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader (little bit of fwb)

Words: 13,749

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, angst, fluff, blood, gunshot wound, a little bit of gore, mentions of death, panic attacks, hurt/comfort

Summary: ❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞

Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now.

A/N: Hey!! lmao so sorry for the super late update. I was sick and then some personal stuff happened and then I thought I got covid so yeah hi lol I'm so sorry lol This chapter was like 20k+ words so I split it into two because that was a lot lol You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

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Jason is stuck pacing back and forth in the room he’s calling a bedroom now. Worry has taken every part of him as his hand grips his phone like a vice. It’s been hours. He hasn’t heard from you or Dick or Gar. He hasn’t heard from anyone and he’s tried calling you seven times. But, your phone is off and your phone is never off. That is the one thing about you, your phone will never be off unless there is a reason for it and being hurt isn’t a good reason. Not to you. The only time your phone even dies is…never. Jason thinks about it and he doesn’t think you’ve let your phone even reach 20% in the entire time you’ve known each other. He thinks it’s probably so someone can always find you and you can always call for help because you’re almost paranoid about it dying. Your phone doesn’t die.

That leaves Jason thinking the worst of the worst. If your phone is off, that means it has to be dead or you shut it off for some reason but that’s uncharacteristic of you. So, he thinks maybe it did die and if it died, that’s because you didn’t charge it. If you didn’t charge your phone, it’s because you were physically incapable of charging it. What if something really bad happened? What if you were shot somewhere else? Jason knows Crane wanted you taken care of, maybe he shot you twice but you’re really good at hiding your pain when you need to. Adrenaline probably kicked in and shock, you were scared for Tim. Maybe you didn’t realize how bad it was. What if there was a complication of some sort and something bad happened?

Jason’s mouth starts to water as his eyes burn. His brows pinch together hard as his teeth grind so hard his jaw starts to ache. He was brought back. But, a part of him really hates that he was. Would you want to be brought back? If you died, would you want to be brought back like him? Jason comes to a stop, trying to steady his own breathing as his leg aches and burns. The scars on his chest feel like he’s being cut open again. What if you don’t want to be brought back but Jason did anyway? What if you did, and he does nothing?

What if you did die?

If you did die…Gar would call him, right?

Gar would definitely call, Jason assures himself. Gar would call immediately if something were happening. He has the number now and Jason’s ringer is on with the vibration set to strong. He has no missed calls but he’s certain Gar would call. If not, he would have called Molly and Molly would have found a way to call Jason. If you were dead, one of them would call him.

And then Jason swallows his own heartbeat as his phone starts ringing.

Gar.

“Hey.” Jason clears his throat, trying to keep himself together as he tries to prepare himself for the worst news he’ll ever get.

“Is she there?” Gar asks and Jason can hear the worry etched in his voice.

“Uh…no?” Jason questions and he’s not sure if he should be relieved or panicked with Gar not knowing where you are. At least he’s not calling to tell Jason you’re dead but that does not rule out you bleeding out in a ditch somewhere. “I told her to go with you.”

Gar sighs on the end, running a hand through his hair. “She took off. I thought maybe she went to find you but she was hurt and she’s not answering her phone. Molly hasn’t heard from her either.”

Jason already figured you wouldn’t go to Molly. If you went to Molly, she would worry, give you a look you don’t like, and you’d run away again anyway. The last thing you’d want to do is drag Molly into it further. But, Jason really hoped you’d have listened for once and just went with Gar. Or at least sent a text to one of them to let them know you’re okay or not.

“She hasn’t been around.” Jason keeps his voice quiet and he looks around his room as if the answer is going to be written on the walls.

“Uh…hey, I know this…might not be what it’s for, but can you track her? She was shot and we’re all really worried.” Gar’s voice is hesitant as he scrunches his nose, hating the idea of having Jason do it. It feels like an invasion of privacy, especially Gar being the one to ask but it’s a last-ditch effort.

Of course, Jason’s been thinking about it. But, something in him can’t get himself to do it. On the small chance you did shut your phone off, that means you don’t want to be found. Jason can’t overstep, he can’t intrude on you. Even if he is desperately wanting to because you could be dead. He thought maybe he’d give you twenty more minutes and then he’d just do it anyway.

“Have you looked for her?” Jason asks, eying his tablet you left out.

“No, I called you first.” Gar admits. Honestly, Gar doesn’t even know where to look but he knew Jason would.

With no one out looking for you, maybe they don’t have to track you and possibly invade your privacy. If you’re just blowing off steam or punishing yourself, Jason knows exactly where you’ll be. He figures, if him, Gar, and Molly can’t find you within an hour, checking all of your spots, he’ll use the tracker.

“Okay, you and Molly go look for her at her usual spots. Molly’ll know ‘em and I’ll check a few others. If we don’t find her in an hour, I’ll track her.” Jason nods his head on the other end.

“Do you think we’ll actually find her? I mean you know how she is.” Gar isn’t trying to be pessimistic but it’s been hours and he thought for sure, you would be with Jason.

Jason can feel the panic attack starting to course through his blood. His heart is racing and his hands are growing clammy and he’s getting unreasonably angry. It is not Gar’s fault because even on a good day, getting you to listen is like pulling fucking teeth, especially when it has to do with taking care of yourself. Jason knows this better than anyone but he’s mad anyway and he knows it’s the panic attack. You were fucking shot and he took off so he’s mad at himself for listening. And he’s mad that you were shot and Gar didn’t stop you. He can turn into a fucking tiger for fuck’s sake, couldn’t he have turned into a tiger to stop you? Tackled you to the ground and pinned you there, dragged you to the manor kicking and screaming if that’s what he had to do. You were shot and maybe you’re dead now and he didn’t help. And Jason didn’t fucking help.

“Fuck! Gar, then you should have fucking followed her!” Jason snaps and immediately feels bad about it but any part of him that should apologize is washed over with guilt and regret and more anger. “Just go fucking look for her with Molly and I’ll look other places.” Jason grabs his coat from the bed and heads for the door.

“Where should we start?” Gar is quiet on the other end.

“The zoo.” Jason spits right back without even thinking. “Start there, then the harbor and I’ll–” Jason cuts himself off as he swings the door open, seeing you right in front of him with bloodshot eyes and blood-stained clothes and hands.

Gotham never sleeps. It never stalls. Everything is always moving, always loud. There is always something going on, people always going from one spot to the next in their lives. In some ways, it’s a little comforting. A reminder that you are here. You are here and alive like all of the people you passed on your walk here living their own lives. On the other hand, you wish it were quiet sometimes. You wish it were quiet sometimes because everything seems too much sometimes and your skin crawls while your heart feels like it’s going to beat out your chest. Your head spins and everything feels too much. But, it was quiet in the basement. It was quiet in the tower before you were attacked. It was quiet in the tunnels. It was quiet when you found Jason. It was quiet when Tim was shot. Maybe quiet is the surrounding air grieving for the mess fate’s created.

So, you stand in Jason’s doorway because quiet with him, alive and breathing, has always been the safest place to be. You stand weakly, haunted by everything that’s happened as the very idea of existing physically pains the deepest parts of your heart.

It’s hard to go through the same shit all the time. You’re just supposed to be fine with it. It’s happened before and you got over it, so you can get over it again, right? At some point, someone reaches the end of their rope and you think you might be there. It is the same pain over and over again and it never gets any easier. Time passes and it all just hurts anyway. People say time heals everything but you don’t think that’s true because you think about your mom dying and it’s like the wind’s been kicked from your chest all over again. You remember Jason’s body and it’s like you're being waterboarded. Time doesn’t heal anything. It’s not even like you’re used to it. You were just traumatized and avoid thinking about everything so it doesn’t fucking hurt so much. But, even that’s just exhausting. Existing is hard and tiring and painful.

Maybe you’re just tired of being in pain.

Your bottom lip starts to quiver and you always felt safest with him. Even from your own thoughts. You never felt too much pain around him. He always knows exactly what to do and it’s all too much right now. Being alone doesn’t work anymore. So, you stare up at him as Jason’s brows pull together with a cross between worry and relief.

“Jason?” Gar calls. “You there?” Gar asks.

“I got her.” Jason says. “She’s here. I’ll call you later.” Jason says quickly before hanging up. “Hey.” Jason’s voice is soft and careful, noticing you’re not making eye contact with him.

You walk the couple of feet up to him as Jason keeps his stance, almost ready to do whatever you’ll need. And all you do is lean forward and rest your forehead against his chest. Jason lets out a breath and you’re able to pull one in for the first time. Jason rests his hand on your back, rubbing up and down slowly as he hears you sniffle against him.

“Gar was calling in a search party. Where the fuck were you?” Jason asks and he should have some sort of bite in his voice but he’s too worried and too relieved.

You look back up to him and shake your head. “Walking. I couldn’t-I couldn’t…do it.” Your jaw squares as you try to hold back your own tears. “S-sorry..I-I didn’t mean to…to, uh, worry you guys. I-I just…just couldn’t.”

Jason nods with understanding, looking you over and it doesn’t look like you took care of the gunshot wound. Your clothes are soaked and your hair is an utter mess. There’s blood on your face and he swears your cheeks are stained with tears and you actually look cold.

Jason rests his hand on your cheek and you finally meet his eyes. “You alright?” Jason asks softly.

“Hurts.” You mutter and his hand almost feels like it’s burning your cheek. He’s so warm.

“The gunshot?” Jason questions, almost afraid of the answer.

“Everything.” You answer weakly with defeat.

You've never seen his look on him before. His jaw is squared but it’s soft rather than harsh like he’d been trying to shatter his own teeth. His brows are pinched but not completely pulled together and they’re aimed downward, etched in worry. His eyes are scanning you over every few seconds as if he’s stuck between thinking you aren’t really here and terrified something really bad is about to happen. Jason Todd worries and you've seen him worried plenty of times but this is different. You've seen him scared, too, plenty of times. More times than you can really count. But, this is different. It’s a different look and it’s because it’s you. And that look alone, chops and hacks at the barrier holding you together until it finally crumbles at your feet.

“It’s all my fault, Jay.” You sputter as you feel your eyes starting to water again. “It’s all my fault and I really fucked up and Tim could die or he did die. I don’t even know cause I left and I’m a fucking coward for leaving and it’s all my fucking fault.” Your mouth waters and you can’t look at his eyes because it’s all too much. “And there was so much…blood again. And the last time…it was you and it was horrible and I lost you and I couldn’t do it again and it just hurts all the time.” You suck in a shaky breath. “And-and Gar would say it’s not my fault and he’d give me the look but it is my fault. And Dick would be mad at me and I deserve it but I can’t hear it right now because I don’t know if I can handle it. And….it’s just-it’s just my fault. And I don’t know if could save him but I tried and I tried to save you, too.” You sputter before a sob finally rips through your throat. It bounces against the walls in a strangled and broken wail as if the very life you've lived has finally taken its toll on you for the last time. Jason isn’t sure he can listen to it because it physically pains him to see and hear you like this.

“Y/n.” Jason tries to get out but you shake your head.

“I tried really fucking hard to save you and it didn’t work. And I had to call Bruce and beg him to help me and he couldn’t and it was so fucking horrible and painful and scary.” You try to suck in a breath as tears scatter down your face. Everything is just wet and ugly, and burning. “It was so bad and I was so alone.” You suck in a ragged breath, your voice cracking and breaking between sobs. “Because Molly didn’t know and fuck Bruce and Gar wasn’t here. I was so alone and it was so scary because there was so much blood and brain matter.” Jason almost winces hearing it. “I don’t know if I would have been able to recognize you if you didn’t have the fucking Robin suit. It was so fucking bad and it hurts to think about and believe it happened but you’re here. And then Tim gets shot and there’s so much blood and I had to ask Dick to help and it’s like I’m there with your body again and it’s scary and it’s painful and I hate it. I hate how much it hurts. I hate doing this. I hate that it keeps happening.” Your chest heaves as you look at Jason with tears soaking your cheeks and your eyes finally meet his. And all Jason can see is defeat. “What if it just keeps happening?”

Jason shakes his head and every single time he is reminded you were the one that found him, he sends himself into a guilt-ridden spiral. Of course, you found him. That isn’t the issue. The issue is what it looked like from your perspective and the devastation it caused. He knows. He knows what it is like to find someone you love dead. He knows and it’s horrible and painful and devastating. It makes someone feel completely hopeless and helpless and useless. There has never been a time where he felt more helpless. And then he put you in that same position, not on purpose. But, he did and it was worse because it was gorey and traumatizing and he left you. He didn’t realize how badly it had traumatized you. It traumatized him, too but it affects you.

Dying doesn’t just happen to the person that’s dead. It happens to everyone around them.

“I’m so sorry.” Jason says softly, sliding his hand off your cheek. He shakes his head, biting his own tongue because he almost wants to cry with you. “I’m fucking sorry.” Jason wraps his arm around your shoulders as he pulls you into him. He’s careful not to hug you too tight, minding the gunshot wound he knows he’ll be taking care of for you later. “You’re not coward.” Jason manages to get out as he tries to come up with an answer for you even though he doesn’t think he’ll ever have one. The reality is that it will keep happening.

“Yeah, I am.” You argue back before you look up at him. “What fucking person just leaves as their friend is bleeding on the ground?”

“Someone who’s fucking traumatized.” Jason bites back. “Someone who was also fucking shot and in shock. You tried to help him and me knowing the shit you’d get for it. You fucking knew I went after the Joker and you show up alone, ready to take him on by your fucking self if you had to. You think that makes you a coward? What’s that make me then, huh?” Jason questions back, knowing you’ll never think of him as a coward, even if he sees that in himself sometimes.

“Not a coward but that’s different.” You argue.

“Fucking how?” Jason spits back. “You left Tim with Dick and the rest of the Titans who would know what to do. You were also fucking shot.” Jason shakes his head.

Jason wonders if this is what it's like dealing with him sometimes. Going round and round, circling the drain into a self-destructive spiral that only seems to have one result. It's not that he minds, it's that you think this. You're anything but a coward and Jason can't even figure out how you could think otherwise. You always do what you think is best for yourself and for the people you care about. Always. And you fight tooth and nail, as hard and as fast as you possibly can for what you believe. That's not cowardly.

“I-I know but…” You sniffle as you shake your head. “H-how can I keep doing this? I mean…losing people and the blood and….how can I do this for other people when I can’t even save the people I love?” You ask bluntly. “That’s shit, you know? We’re supposed to be out helping people and…and I can’t even…I fail with the people that matter. So, what’s the point?”

Jason would be lying if he doesn't question what the point is half the time, especially over the last few days. What's the point of living if this is even how it plays out? Pain and chaos, destruction and lonelienss. It's all pretty miserable, actually. But, he holds on anyway because it wasn't always like this.

Shit gets bad and then it gets better and yeah, it is exhausting sometimes. But, it's always gotten better. Jason doesn't know how much better it'll get from here now but he won't tell you that. He just knows he wakes up and he tries because you were nearly beaten an inch from your life and you find so much joy and love in small things that that alone seems to give Jason some sort of hope. And because Gar's family was killed and Gar was experimented on and he is the most optimistic person he has ever met. And because Molly lived on the streets with the death of her parents and Molly is the nicest person Jason has ever met. If all of these people can just be better after everything, than he can't very well just give up. And you can't either. Maybe there isn't a point but you'll never know if you give up.

“You know what you told me? You are the one that said sometimes we fail, that’s part of the job. But, we try.” Jason licks his lips as he sucks in a breath. “You talked me off the roof. Maybe Deathstroke would have tried to kill me or done worse shit if it weren’t for you. Fucking Pete Hawkins bullshit. The kid at Jerry’s. You were the one that fought tooth and fucking nail to save Gar. And you did, by the way. You saved Tim at Excellent Gotham. You failed two fucking times but by my count, you win more often.”

“Three times.” You correct him, earning you a glare. “Gar got kidnapped, we failed then…too.”

“You were both tranquilized and they used kryptonite on Krypto. I don’t think that counts.” Jason nods his head.

“I guess.” You let out a breath, looking to your shoes. “I just, uh,” You sniffle as you shake your head, looking back to him. “I just want the pain to stop.” Your voice cracks again.

Jason doesn’t say it, but he does, too. So, he wraps his arms around you and pulls you into him.

You press your cheek to his chest, wrapping your arms around him as your breathing is still rapid and ragged. But, you can hear his heartbeat in between breaths. It’s fast but steady. A lot quicker than it usually is but it is there. A few more tears leak out as you count his heartbeat and are fully engulfed by his warmth. You hadn’t realized just how numb you had gotten from the cold until now. Your fingers and toes are starting to feel like painful pins and needles. Your arms are burning and your cheek sting from the salty tears. It’s as if you're thawing from his warmth. Between that and his steady heartbeat, you calm yourself down.

“I can try to help.” Jason whispers softly. “If you’ll have me.” Jason pulls away just enough to look down at you and your eyes meet his.

You told him before that you’d come for everything that ever hurt him if it came to it. Anyone that ever wanted to hurt him, would have to go through you. Because he was just Jason Todd to you. It didn’t matter that he could -- should have been able to -- take care of himself. And Jason knew that’s how it was for him, too. Anyone who wants to hurt you, has to go through him. But, the problem is that someone did hurt you…because of him. And he hurt you. Right now you're in pain and it’s because of him. It’s not right and it’s not fair to you but Jason wants to protect you. He’d cut out pieces of his heart and glue them to yours if it would make you feel better. He would do anything in this world if it would make your pain less. Any form of pain that wants to come for you, is going to have to go through him first. From now on.

You nod your head. “Always.” You croak out.

“Come on.” Jason releases his arms and cold rushes itself right back over your body. “Sit on the bed, I’ll grab you some clothes and supplies to clean that shit. We’ll start there.”

“Thanks, Jay.” You mutter softly, walking to the bed and Jason watches you carefully.

He wonders if this is how it always felt for you. He’d come home bloody and bruised, weak and pitiful. Scared and in pain. He never said anything but Jason knows you always knew. Somehow, you always knew when he was hurt and scared. But, it was always him walking through the door hurt, not you. And it was you that would stitch him up. Sure, he’s helped you with your hands, but you did it at least twice a week for months. And you never complained. But, Jason wonders if this is what it feels like.

It feels like he’s carrying the weight of the world for the both of you and he’s trapped in a worrying spin. And he is so fucking sad for you. It’s not pity, but just sadness. It’s wanting the best for you and you to have everything good in this world because you deserve it. And wanting to witness it because he loves you. It’s just wanting to see you smile and happy, making some stupid joke and telling him to fuck off. It’s just wanting you to not be in pain anymore. He wonders if this is how it felt being you and if so, he wants to know so badly how the fuck you dealt with it because he feels like he’s suffocating while he grabs you clothes.

Jason walks back over to you, handing you a pair of sweatpants and a red hoodie. “I got first aid shit in the bathroom so change and I’ll be back.” Jason nods his head at you.

“Okay.” You answer weakly and Jason hesitates for a few seconds before he practically runs off to the bathroom.

You're weak and unsteady as you change into the sweats. You're realizing you haven’t eaten in a while and you haven’t had much to drink either. That’s definitely not helping your mental state and you know it. But, if you were being really honest, none of those activities sound like things you're currently capable of doing. Changing is even almost too much effort at this point. And it fucking hurts as you try to take your shirt off to swap it for the hoodie.

“Need help?” Jason appears right back not two minutes later.

You always hated feeling helpless but not around him. “Yeah, it hurts.” You sniffle softly, sitting pitifully on the bed.

Jason walks over, resting the kit beside you before he lightly grabs the hem of your hoodie. Jason helps you tug it off of your bad shoulder and then over your head, you groaning the entire time. With the hoodie off, you're left in a blue t-shirt and Jason sees where the bullet hole is, covered in red and brown. With the chaos of last night, he didn’t check and wasn’t able to check if the wound was a through and through. Jason's stomach twists at the thought that it's not. But, he hides his worry, looking back to you with a soft sigh.

“How did you wanna do this?” Jason asks bluntly.

Your brows furrow in confusion. “I-I don’t know?” You shake your head.

“I can’t clean it with your shirt on.” Jason sucks in a breath and normally he’d have some comment about seeing you half naked again but he can’t quite muster it this time.

“Oh…” You whisper and you swear it’s fine. It’s not like you haven’t seen each other naked before and it’s not like you didn’t see Jason fully exposed just the other night. There is something that just feels…new and vulnerable again. “That’s fine.” You nod and Jason leans forward again, tugging the hem of your shirt up and over your head, freeing your arm. You grab Jason's hoodie with your good arm and Jason helps tug it onto your good arm, you thankful it's a zip-up and not a pullover. “Guess that’ll do.” You suck in a breath and you're kind of tired of feeling like this. “I expect you to actually help and not just stare at my tits the whole time.”

Jason manages a cheeky smirk. “You know I’m ass guy anyway.” Jason glances down and then back to you.

“Shithead.” You mutter and Jason’s head swims. It’s been so long since you've called him that and it almost feels nostalgic.

“Babe.” Jason quips back.

Jason takes out his phone, examining the gunshot now that there isn’t anything in the way. There’s still blood everywhere and he can’t even tell if it’s because you did such a shit job at cleaning it or if the wound is actually that bad. Something in his stomach twists and turns into a gnawing pain at the thought this is worse than he originally thought. But, he keeps a straight face, not to let his worry cross even a single line of his face. When he worries, you worry.

Jason grabs a wet rag from the bowl he brought in with him, gently cleaning around the area to try to get a better look. You let out a shaking breath, the water cool against your skin.

“Sorry, no hot water.” Jason barely glances to you as he scrubs some of the dry blood away.

“Should probably fix that.”

“Pilot lights are expensive.”

“I have Bruce’s credit card.” You mutter quietly, earning a look from Jason.

He stops, looking up at you fully. “You would.”

“Eat the rich.” You shrug. “Or take their money when it’s offered to you and he didn’t ask for it back.” Jason lets out a snicker before he goes back to cleaning. “You should use yours. It might send up a red flag for Bruce and maybe he’ll call someone back or come back.”

You hate the words as they leave your lips because wanting Bruce back means admitting defeat. But, Gotham has gone to absolute shit since Bruce decided to fuck off somewhere. At least Gotham had some degree of fear and respect for the Bat. They don't seem to like the Titans very much. And Jason's been off his rocker and you've been stuck trying to help him. Gotham does need someone they respect. Bruce should definitely come back. And if for no other reason, to see his son is alive again.

Jason scoffs. “Yeah, fucking right.” He shakes his head in annoyance. “Fuck Bruce. I don’t need him.”

Before he died, he was getting better about talking about his problems and the things that kept him up at night. He was doing better with it but then he comes back and the very idea of talking about it makes him want to crash through a window headfirst onto solid pavement. In all fairness, he already hated talking about Bruce. It was one thing to complain about him but it was an entirely other thing to unravel and dig into actually talking about him. Now, though, it’s worse because every time Jason thinks about Bruce, it’s as if his heart starts to break all over again.

Maybe him getting bludgeoned death was his fault. He knew better. But, where was Bruce? Bruce gave up on him. And then…was going to let the Joker just…live. Jason was supposed to be Bruce’s son and he couldn’t even kill the Joker for him or do anything about him. And maybe, just maybe, Jason could get over that eventually but Jason’s alive again and Bruce is nowhere to be found. With everything going on in Gotham, Jason is certain Dick would have called Bruce and let him know. If for no other reason than to rat Jason out to “dad”. So, maybe Jason feels like he was always a little expendable to Bruce, not just Crane or the Titans. And that part hurts the most.

“Didn’t say you did?” You let out a breath. “Just saying is all.” You pull in a deep breath. “Fuck Bruce, yeah. Just saying.” You, for one, still hate Bruce but Jason hating Bruce seems weird. You chalked it up to the drug at first and Crane but…Jason’s clean. It’s weird, even for Jason. “What’s your sudden issue with Bruce anyway?”

“You got a problem with me having a problem with Bruce all of a sudden?” Jason spits back and he shouldn’t, given your current state but his heartache over being abandoned by him is fresh.

“Oh, no. I am actually fine with that cause fuck Bruce but it’s weird. After all of that shit, you come back and suddenly don’t like him. That’s weird, Jay. Even for you.”

“Never fucking mattered to him. I was always just the replacement for Dick anyway. Doesn’t fucking matter.” Jason dips the rag into the water, rinsing some of the blood off before going back to the wound.

You furrow your brows, trying to figure out where that’s even coming from. “Uh…not true? Bruce is a fucking weirdo and shit but I actually think he gives a shit about you, Jay. Outside of Robin and Dick. You always said that, too. Like deep down you knew that, so what is it now?”

Jason grows more and more angered but he knows you aren’t going to drop it. “You were fucking right, alright?” Jason snaps back. “Should have killed the fucking Joker because he killed me. So fuck him.” Jason keeps his explanation short.

“Right yeah, had he just killed him, you wouldn’t have died and it doesn’t make up for it because too little, too late shit, but like…he did—“

“Can you fucking drop it, please?” Jason’s words come out more as a demand rather than a request. “I’m done fucking talking about it.” Jason looks at your shoulder from your back, seeing there’s no hole in the fabric.

“Sorry.” You say softly. It just doesn’t sit right with you. You’d still be pissed at Bruce, too because had he killed the Joker in the first place that wouldn’t have happened but that’s…not really Jason. He doesn’t hold many grudges and Bruce did kill the Joker. It was a little late for that but he did, to avenge Jason. Bruce didn’t throw his morals away for Dick, he threw them away for Jason and that would normally mean something to him. It’s weird but you know when to push and when not to. You're not in the mood to fight it anyway. “Just thought it was weird, is all.”

“It’s fine. Sorry.” Jason squints at the wound, seeing something shine back at him and his heart plummets. He grabs his phone, shining a light into the wound again. “The bullet is still inside.”

“Figured.” You let out a breath.

“I have to take it out.”

Your eyes land on his and you know this is about to suck. “Okay.” You nod your head.

“Lay back and hold the phone so I can see.” Jason hands you his phone as you do as told.

Jason grabs a pair of tweezers from the kit and he looks at the wound, grabbing your wrist to make sure the light is in the right position. Jason’s stomach twists into a hard knot, knowing how bad this is going to hurt. His leg starts to throb with the very thought of putting you through it. But, it has to be done. You're not going to go to an actual doctor for help and if he leaves the bullet in, it can lead to infection. So, Jason sucks in a deep breath and bends down hovering over the wound, careful not to block the light.

“It’s gonna hurt.” Jason glances up at you.

“Just do it.” You sigh, looking to the ceiling as your grip on his phone tightens.

Jason nods his head before gently sticking the tweezers into the wound. You slam your eyes shut as your jaw clenches. Your right hand grips onto the blanket beneath you as Jason moves the tweezers around. It’s burning and stinging like getting stung by a thousand hornets at once. It’s as if you're being shot in the spot over and over again as tears well behind your eyes. Jason is trying to be careful and quick, but the bullet is slippery thanks to the blood.

Your hand starts to shake as your breath grows rapid and uneven. You try your best to concentrate on anything besides the pain but that’s becoming increasingly more difficult. It was different when you were in the fight for your life. It was do or die and people can do absolutely insane things they should not have been able to accomplish in life or death situations. Your life isn’t in danger right now and even when you try to focus on something else, the tweezers move just enough and you're brought back to agonizing pain.

Given the events that happened, it’s hard for you to focus on anything other than the pain you're been in. You try to think of the good times but then those are tarnished like rusted silverware. Those good memories now come with pain, too. You try to focus on what you’re going to do about Crane because maybe that would kick in your fighting instincts but you're the one lying in a bed right now after being shot by him. Everything around you feels like it’s rusting and chipping away into a toxic pile of reds and browns. Tainted, tarnished, and broken.

Jason glances up to you and he can see the agony written in every wrinkle and pinch of your skin. And he can’t see with the phone basically vibrating in your hand. All he can even feel is anger and not at you. It’s entirely on him and Crane because at the end of the day, it’s his fault and Crane’s how you ended up here. You never should have been shot. You were only there to look out for him. You and Tim were collateral damage. So many people around Jason end up just being collateral damage. And they don’t deserve it. But, at the end of the day, he isn’t the one that pulled the trigger at you and all he wants to do is go right after Crane. Make him feel the same pain he’s put you through. And then worse.

“Y/n.” Jason says, sternly. “You have to stop moving. I can’t see.”

You swallow thickly, trying to stabilize your hand. “Sorry.” You manage to mutter through your gritted teeth.

Jason goes back to the wound but the second he sticks the tweezers into the flesh, you wince and flinch as hard you try to stay still. Jason is no stranger to this and he knows it is agonizing to pick something out of an open wound. Nerves and flesh are exposed that should not be. It’s horrendous and seconds feel like hours. And it’s triggering phantom pain in his leg as his heart feels like it’s being suffocated with barbed wire. He knows it’s bad when you're the one who can’t sit still.

Jason pulls back, putting the tweezers back in the kit before he cups your cheeks. He bends down so his face is just an inch from yours and you open your eyes slowly, your jaw still clenched and tears threatening to finally fall.

“You gotta stay still or I’m never gonna be able to get it out.” Jason’s voice is stern.

“It fucking hurts.” Your voice cracks weakly as you sniffle.

“You were almost beaten to death. This isn’t gonna fucking kill you. You’ll be fine.” Jason nods his head once at you before he presses his forehead to yours for just a second.

You nod weakly at him. “Yeah…”

“Just…stay still and I’ll be quick, alright?” Jason asks, seeing the doubt across your face. “I got you.” Jason offers a weak smile.

“Okay.” You nod your head in agreement.

Jason nods once more before he goes back to your wound. He focuses on the bullet while the tweezers hover above you and you can’t help but notice the lack of shaking in his hands. Come to think of it, you aren’t sure the last time you saw his hand so steady. Jason has always been so steady around you. An unmovable force.

Jason looks back to you, raising his brows as if silently asking if you if you're ready and all you do is nod quickly before looking back to the ceiling. Your grip tightens on the phone while you lock in place with all of your might just to try to stay steady.

The tweezers stick back into the bloody wound, carefully and steadily as they go right to the bullet. Jason keeps his eyes laser-focused on just getting the bullet out and you grit your teeth together as tears come to your eyes. But, you suck in a deep breath as you feel the metal scraping around the wound, clinging onto every part your self-control in order to stay steady. That’s when Jason finally is able to grab the bullet, pulling it out in a steady motion, careful not to drop it.

Jason holds the bullet with the tweezers as a triumphant grin comes to his lips. You peek your eyes open at him, the whites turning a bright shade of pale pink.

“Told you I got you.” Jason shrugs casually but the grin quirks into a cheeky smirk.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah thanks.” You roll your eyes as you sniffle.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, that shit was just, uh painful. I really don’t recommend getting shot.” You lay the phone down beside you before rubbing your right eye.

“Yeah, don’t plan on it.” Jason quips back. “Probably stop hurting soon without the bullet.”

“Be nice.” You let out a sigh. “And Dick really just went to bed like this. What a fucking psycho.”

"Yeah, but you went MIA." Jason narrows his eyes at you because maybe he is a little mad at you for it. They were all worried. He was worried. "You bitch about him but--"

“If you fucking say it, Jason Todd, I’ll kill you again.” You deadpan. “You two are the ones that are oddly similar, okay?”

Jason lets out a scoff. “Bullshit. I’m nothing like him.”

You roll your eyes. “Yeah, you are. You’re different but you’re similar. You just don’t wanna see it. What? You never looked up to him before all of this shit?” You ask.

Jason sits back on his heels, dropping the bullet in the first aid kit with the tweezers to toss and clean later. “What’s to look up to?” Jason scoffs. “Being a fucking kiss ass and a goody two-shoes.”

“Because he was the first Robin.” You state casually. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, about you replacing him and shit whatever. But, didn’t you ever look up to him for even a little bit?”

Jason hangs his head and while he’s always felt less than and a bit like a failure when it came to filling his shoes, he definitely did look up to him. Dick created something so special and surreal when it came to Robin. He wasn’t Batman, he was just a kid in a suit helping Batman and that was cool. Then Bruce had all of these stories about Dick and it always made Jason want to be like him because Dick was good. That’s how Bruce always talked anyway. Jason doesn’t know that Bruce always talked about Jason in the same way when he wasn’t around. And Dick doesn’t know how Bruce would talk about him to everyone else. But Jason heard the stories and how great Dick was. He never wanted to be exactly like him but he definitely wanted to be somewhat like him. Dick’s parents were killed and he got to be Robin. By all that Jason heard, it seemed he made it out of it okay. He had Robin and he got to carry that with him. He got to have a career in helping people (kind of). Jason did want to be like him but the way he sees it, there’s a reason people say not to meet your heroes.

“Still mad about the Joker shit but…uh,” You sniffle again. “Don’t know, be a lie if I said I didn’t look up to him…and you.”

“Me?”

“I always liked your Robin.” You say quietly. “You were different. Felt like we needed your version. But I told you that.”

“Surprised you still think it.”

“I think we need someone like Red Hood.” You state, catching Jason entirely off guard.

“What? Another fucking murderer?” Jason scoffs, looking to the window above the bed before he looks back to you.

He feels so ashamed of it all at times, like right now. It's because you're the one lying here after being shot by someone Jason thought he could trust. He knows deep down, crime in Gotham needs a change. The Bat doesn't fix everything, clearly. There needs to be someone out there that is willing to do more but Jason isn't sure that's him. He already burned his bridges. He doused them in gasoline and lit a match with a smile. He feels like he's on the wrong side and there's nothing he can do to rebuild that bridge to be on the right side anymore. If there's even a right side.

“No. Someone who’s willing to do the heavy and bad shit in order to prevent worse shit from happening. Like I said, I’m not just killing people for you, it’s for all of us and everyone that will come after us. I think we need people like that and people are afraid of you and rightfully so. I dunno. Just my take, I guess.”

“Been thinking about the people I killed.” Jason lets out a breath. “Heavy shit.”

“Yeah, but a lot of that is greater good shit and the other stuff is Crane’s manipulation so you shouldn’t feel too guilty for those.” You shrug your good shoulder.

Jason shakes his head and he doesn't how you deal with any of it. You don't normally deal with much, if Jason is being honest. But, you seem to be dealing with this pretty okay. Somewhere in him, he always felt like if someone were going to go on a killing spree, you would probably be that person. Your morals have never aligned with Dick's or Bruce's. You've always felt like more could be done, permanently. But, Jason's surprised you seem so okay with it and with him killing people.

“How the fuck are you dealing with it?”

You let out a broken laugh. “I’m not.” You answer honestly. “So much shit is happening that I just…can’t.” You shake your head. “Can’t think about it.”

Jaso nods with understanding. “Yeah.” Jason sucks in a breath, deciding to drop the conversation. It feels too much again. Too loud. Too heavy. “Stay still.” Jason leans forward, grabbing the rag before he starts cleaning her wound again.

You watch him carefully. He’s not handling anything well which you can’t say you really blame him for. You wonder what you would be doing if you were in his position. How would you ever forgive yourself for not only everything that’s happened but also being manipulated? Being manipulated isn’t Jason’s fault but you know he’s probably blaming himself for it because you would be blaming yourself for it if it were you. You wonder how he feels about coming back. You haven’t really talked about it and part of that is you're just afraid to ask because talking about him dying nearly sends you into a spiraling panic attack. But, you wonder how he’s dealing with that and if he’s happy he’s back.

Jason’s hands are steady as he grabs the gauze, his brows pinched together with concentration as he goes back to the wound and you find yourself wondering if you were meant to be anyway. Everything seemed so much easier in San Francisco. You weren’t together then and it was all just fun and games. Sure, you both were kidnapped and that was bad. But, that was one thing. Meanwhile, being together in Gotham has been a shitshow since the start almost. Maybe it’s just the butterfly effect but you wonder if it was just you both trying to find solace in each other or if it was as real as it’s always felt. Maybe you were just feeding off of each other’s own self-destruction and avoidance. Maybe being together helped the other one crumble.

Your eyes scan over his face and you realize, you don’t remember the last time you saw his face bruised. But, while you were together, he was always littered in them and almost always had one somewhere on his face like a Jackson Pollock. That solidifies the thought of you. Maybe you weren’t meant to be after all. Maybe you were actually bad for each other. Maybe you being together really was just you both self-destructing, knowing damn well one of you would die and it would destroy you. Maybe being together was always a way to hurt yourselves in the worst way.

And that hurts worse than the gunshot.

You've always been so sure about him. Even when you weren't sure, a part of you was. It was always supposed to be him. Him and you. But, you were shot and you're thinking a lot about how people's lives might be better if you weren't in them anymore. You're thinking about how things might be better for Jason if you weren't together. You skew your own reality, convincing yourself you got together in order to hurt yourselves. That's all it could possibly be. You ignore every thought about you confessing how loving him is the easiest thing you'd ever done. You push every thought of every soft moment you have ever had into the darkest part of your mind where they can be tainted and painted over. You push away everything Jason has ever told you and goes against everything Jason has ever believed about himself and what he deserves. It all feels like lies to yourself. It was just self-destruction because that has to be it, right?

You go back and forth with yourself. One part of you thinking this must be fact and the other part of you thinking it's just because it's a bad day. Everything feels worse on bad days and it is so easy to push everything good into a dark corner and paint right over it as if it were something different entirely. And today is a bad day. So, a part of you screams and begs for you to just ask Jason because Jason wouldn't lie. If it was all just self-destruction, Jason would tell you. He wouldn't lie about it.

“Do you think we were just a consequence of our own self-destruction?” You ask quietly, moving your eyes to the ceiling. "Or...was it like....real?"

Jason hears the question and pauses. He almost questions if he heard you correctly but he glances back to you and you're avoiding his stare which means he definitely did. His heart sinks and he thinks he forgot how to breathe for a second. Do you actually think that? Jason isn’t sure what would hurt more at this point. You thinking that’s all you were to him or that being all you were to you.

“What?” Jason asks, more for clarity.

“I mean like…exactly, uh, what I said. Do, uh, d-do you think we were just a consequence of our own self-destruction?” You chew the inside of your cheek and you regret asking. “Or…was it all real?”

The question hangs in the air like the blade of a guillotine, just waiting for one of you to pull the rope and end it all. The air starts to feel stale and cold and heavy as Jason doesn’t move, processing the question.

He’s not entirely sure where that question is even coming from. This whole time, you've wanted nothing more than him and you've said that. You have told him that he is all you have ever wanted. Why would you just be a consequence? Was he just a consequence?

Jason sits all the way up, coming into view. “Do you think that?” Jason asks bluntly as his breath hangs in the stagnant air. It’s as if he is clawing at the last remaining parts of his voice to remain steady and not shatter and break.

You look back to him, following the hollowed lines of worry of his face. You aren’t sure he’s breathing and you regret asking the question. You don’t even know why you asked in the first place. It’s not like you actually want to know because sometimes not knowing is just better, less painful. And the look on his face isn’t making you feel any better because he looks torn between devasted and angry.

“I asked you first.” You say quietly.

“No.” Jason states bluntly, almost harshly.

Being with you was never him self-destructing. In Jason’s eyes, as much as it all got fucked up in the end, being with you healed more parts of him than he ever thought possible. Being with you actually healed parts of him he swore would never be put together no matter how hard he tried. You made him better. He got to be who he wanted to be with you and shamelessly, you fully accepted him. And he really thought, he could be that version of himself forever because you always convinced him he could. You made him want to put in a hard effort into coming home and thinking twice before doing something a little too reckless, outside of the whole Crane and Joker thing. You showed him what it was like to be loved without conditions. And Jason loves you still. No conditions. No consequence. No self-destruction. He loves you yesterday, today, and he is positive he’ll love you tomorrow and every day after that because he wants to.

“Do you?” Jason asks, choosing not to elaborate.

You swallow a lump in your throat. Despite your own negative thoughts, you know you don't. Not really. Maybe you thinking it is a self-destruction thing, maybe it's your way of trying in order to punish yourself for Tim and everything else. But, no. Of course, not.

“No.” Your voice is quiet and fragile, making Jason’s heart sink because he knows there’s a but coming. “But, uh..we just…we ended up here.” You let out a scoff. “And, uh, I don’t know.” You shake your head. “We said some pretty fucked up shit to each other and I know…uh, I know you were high but, uh…yeah.”

Devasted. That’s all Jason can feel because he’s one of the reasons you even asked. He knows he said some horrible shit to you and he can’t take any of it back. Words are long-lasting. They enter the air and stick to it, absorbing itself into your lungs as you pull in a breath and let it fester there. That’s where the words start and travel to your brain where they store away, pecking at you just at the right moments. No one can take words back and Jason knows that. But, he has to try anyway even if he doesn't think it’ll salvage you. You have to know you meant and mean the entire world to him still.

“I didn’t mean any of that shit, okay? I swear, I didn’t fucking mean it.” Jason states quickly. “I was fucking high and I just wanted to fucking hurt you which is fucked up and I’m fucking sorry.” Jason spits out quickly but with a fire. There is no relief coming to your face and even if you are nothing to each other after this is over, he needs you to believe him. Jason cups your face. “I fucking swear. We weren’t a fucking mistake and you were the best thing that happened to me and I fucked that up. That’s on me. You made me better. I’m fucking so sorry, alright?”

You nod against his hand. And you know. You were also high and none of the shit you said is true. You didn't mean any of it. You didn't even mean the shit you said while you were sober. Maybe it's just a part of you that needs it to be verified today.

“I know and I’m sorry, too. I don’t know. I just get thinking about it, I guess. We both ended up here and it’s just…” You suck in a breath. “I know.” You place your hands over his. “Because I said some horrible shit, too, and then I hit you. And uh…I know. It’s just…that on top of everything else that happened. Like…” You shrug softly. “You died, Jason.”

Jason drops his hands, shaking his head, putting the pieces together. There is no way in hell you really think him going off on his own is your fault. Every piece of that shit plan, was on Jason. It was on him to just wait and get help. It was on him to reach out and get help. It was on him not to trust Crane. Everything was on him. That's not for you to carry.

“You don’t really think that shit is on you, right?”

“I should have seen it.” You sputter. “I should have fucking known, Jay. And the more I think about it, the more I think maybe I did know and maybe I just…let it happen to teach you a lesson about being dumb out there and—“

“Stop.” Jason cuts you off sharply. “You would never let me go after the fucking Joker by myself. You never would have even if you wanted to teach me some lesson. And I don’t think that’s it either. You do the same shit I do.” Jason scoffs. “I went after him. By myself. I do what I always did. I went after him. Alone, And I died alone. Because I never fucking ask for help. That’s not on you. And it’s got nothing to fucking do with us.”

“Yeah, but if you were me?” You question. “You’d be thinking the same thing. There were so many signs and I just…somehow missed every single one of them. I have to think I ignored them and maybe not to teach you a lesson but because I was scared.”

Jason sucks in a breath and he knows you're right because if it were him, he’d never forgive himself. If the roles were reversed, he’d also be questioning how he missed it and maybe he let you do it. Maybe he ignored the signs on purpose. Jason, being on the side he is, knows for a fact you didn’t willfully ignore any sign. You have shown him time and time again that if you have any say in it, you’d never let something happen to him. But, Jason understands why you think that so he sucks in a breath and decides to take some of that Gar advice for once.

“I remember what I was thinking about while the Joker was playing whack-a-mole with my head.” Jason mutters, earning him a grimace and a glare from you.

“Really?” You give him a displeased look.

Jason shrugs. “Well…” Jason sucks in a breath with the quick raise of his brows.

“You do though?” You ask cautiously.

Jason nods. “Yeah, I…I remember everything.” Jason swallows the growing lump in his throat. “Told you that, but…yeah.” Jason nods quickly. “Remember thinking I should have just listened to you. I should have told you because you would have talked me out of it, you would have told Bruce and Dick. I’d be pissed…but you would have helped and I wouldn’t be getting killed. So…just fucking saying,” Jason sucks in a breath and goes back to your wound. “Me dying had nothing to fucking do with you and there was nothing you could have done differently. We weren’t a consequence our own self-destruction. I’m really fucking sorry for all of the shit I’ve put you through.”

Your brows furrow and your heart starts to break again. It must be a horrible task to wake up every single day with memories, even down to final thoughts, about literally dying. You know it’s your own personal hell at this point but the idea of Jason reliving it every single day…it’s worse. And the fact he brought it up without you asking, you know.

“I forgive you, Jay.” You say quietly. “And I really, really, mean that, okay? Your, uh…your last thoughts…were regret?” You ask cautiously.

Jason shakes his head. “No.” Jason answers plainly. “Not all of them.” Jason lets out a breath. The last thing Jason wants is to talk about how the last thing he remembers is knowing he was going to die. You don't need to know that, that's for damn sure.“I-I don’t want to talk about it though. I really just needed you to know that.”

“Thank you, Jay." You watch him carefully, seeing something distant and broken cloud over his eyes. His brows pull together as if he's in pain and his hand starts to shake. You hope he'll talk about it one day. Maybe being brought back isn't all it's cracked up to be. "When you do want to talk, please talk t me.”

“I will.” Jason nods his head at you once before finishing up the wound.

“Maybe we were both just ticking time bombs to get here.” You suck in a breath. “I don’t think we were a consequence and it was real for me. I just…had to ask I guess.”

“Maybe we kept each other from getting here.” Jason nearly mutters the words under his breath before he goes back to fixing up your wound.

You let the silence fill the room as you think about it because maybe he’s right. It wasn’t until he died the two of you fell off the deep end. Sure, things weren’t great for you both mentally but maybe you together helped stabilize some part of you both. Maybe being together was the glue you both needed like a kintsugi sculpture. Putting broken pieces back together to be better than they were before. You both ended up here but maybe that’s better.

In the last two weeks, the two of you have learned more about each other and life and the consequences of everything. Maybe that’s how it was supposed to be. So, you both could be better people today. Maybe you both rely too much on each other to help you mend your broken pieces but that doesn’t mean you were bad together or you were the cause of this. That doesn’t mean who you both are today is worse. Maybe who you both are today is better because it’s honest.

You both are scared but you both are honest and you aren’t letting your fears control every aspect of everything you do. You’re both standing up for yourselves in ways you didn’t think you would. Jason is figuring out his shit now and standing where he should. Where he wants. He’s standing up against people who made him feel worthless, something he otherwise never did too much. Maybe this is who you both are meant to be in the end and maybe that’s not so bad.

“Done.” Jason backs away as you look down, seeing your shoulder bandaged. “Don’t get shot again.” Jason manages the tint of a smirk.

“Gee, I wonder why I didn’t think of that.” You mock him before you sit up and slide the hoodie on entirely.

“Yeah, you really fucking should have. I mean, get it together, babe.” Jason offers a little bit of snark, the smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth.

“Okay, fuck you.” You laugh softly. “Thank you.”

Jason nods his head. “Anytime.” Jason smiles softly at you.

You pull out your phone from your other hoodie and hand it to Jason. "It died and in the chaos, I dropped my charging block." You offer a guilty smile as Jason takes your phone and plugs it into his charger. “So, uh, what’re you gonna do about Crane? Like….fuck.” You roll your eyes.

“Kill him.” Jason spits.

“No.” You shake your head. “I was serious. I wanna kill him.”

“Seriously?” Jason quips.

“Yes. I’m sick of people making you think you’re some fucking monster when you’re not. And he fucking sucks anyway. He did everything to you, he almost got Dick killed, he’s gotten innocent people killed, he almost killed me, and he killed or almost killed Tim. Yeah, I’d like to kill him.” You let out a sigh. “I mean, if you really want to kill him for what he did to you, go for it just let me get a shot in. If it’s for me? Let me do it.”

“It’s kind of fucked we’re even having this conversation right now.” Jason chuckles. “Fine. But, I get a few fucking shots in. I meant what I said, no one gets to fuck with you again.”

“And I meant what I said. No one gets to fuck with you, Jason Todd.” You offer him a sweet smile, something that should feel off given you're talking about killing someone but instead, it brings Jason some sort of comfort.

A smirk grows onto his lips before it turns soft. “Can handle myself.”

“Okay, no the fuck you cannot.” You quip back as you let out a soft laugh. “Just because you can though, doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. I got you.” You smile softly at him. "You and me."

Jason remembers a night a few months ago and he was sitting in the library reading because things were just a little too heavy and loud that day. You walked in and started scrapbooking on the floor just so Jason wouldn't be alone. And he remembers thinking how peaceful it was, just the two of you. He remembers thinking he felt lucky.

In a world where he experiences so much pain and unfairness, he felt lucky in that moment and in every moment he got to spend with you. As much as he loves to beat himself up, especially these days, he'd like to think maybe he can be lucky again. Maybe he can be at peace again one day. If you keep on thinking this and keep a hold on him. If you're willing to not let him do this alone, just as you said all those months ago in San Francisco, maybe you can get back to where you were and maybe you both can be lucky and at peace. Maybe the universe will offer some sort of kindness for the suffering it's caused you both.

“What about the Titans?” Jason asks, clearing his throat and swallowing his own thoughts.

“Right, yeah, I uh, I need to talk to Dick still. I told them it was Crane last night, not sure really if they believed me or not. Hope so. I’m sure Gar did so that’s at least good.” You nod your head a few times, hating the idea of having to explain this whole thing to Dick. You're kind of tired of being the mediator.

“We could just go take out Crane ourselves.” Jason suggests casually as he gets up and walks to the other side of the room where he has a mini fridge seated against the wall.

"While that does sound like fun," You laugh softly because you wish you could actually just do that. It would probably put an end to all of this but Dick would lose his shit. “I have an idea.”

“I hate when you say that.” Jason groans as he grabs two bottles of Gatorade and a box of granola bars from the top of the fridge before he walks back over to you. Jason tosses the box and one of the Gatorades at you before he plops down and scoots himself so his back rests against the wall, his legs extending in front of him. "Assumed you haven't eaten or had anything to drink." Jason explains, cracking open his Gatorade while you do the same.

"Yeah, I haven't thank you." You give him a soft smile before you start explaining yourself, grabbing a granola bar before you start your ramble. “Taking Crane out would be a fun time and he deserves it and most of our problems would likely be solved. However, what if Dick is right? What if he does have something bigger planned that we don’t know about? And then we kill him and like…maybe he poisons everyone somehow or blows up the city? I don’t know. We kind of need to know. And knowing his whereabouts would also be kind of helpful. So, what if you just….side with him still? Be the inside guy, right? And then Dick will really believe us that it wasn’t you who shot us and you won’t have to worry about Dick trying to turn you in, I wouldn’t let him but still.”

Jason pauses, holding the open bottle of Gatorade to his mouth. He's pretty sure you're suffering blood loss because that's insane. It's about as insane as you saying he should take the drug to not go through withdrawal. You're losing your sanity. "He already poisoned the water." Jason states.

"He did what now?" You blink at him.

"Your phone died, yeah. The water is poisoned with something he did so don't drink it. GCPD put out an alert this morning." Jason explains.

"Oh, that's fun. Well, still. It's Crane. You know he has something completely insane planned. Probably." You scoot closer to Jason, sitting on your knees right beside him.

“You want me to work with fucking Crane after he just tried to kill you? That’s fucking insane. Do you know that?” Jason questions with a groan. He wants nothing to do with Crane, even if he could get information from him.

“Yes.” You nod once.

“Fuck no.” Jason shakes his head in the same casual manner before snagging a granola bar.

“Jay, look, okay he thinks he can still manipulate you so let him think that and find out what he’s up to.”

“He won’t tell me shit.” Jason shakes his head in annoyance as he unwraps the granola bar.

“Maybe he will now. If he just tried to kill me and you go back to him anyway, right? Say I turned on you or whatever. That I think it was a setup against me so you wouldn’t have to be the one to pull that trigger. If he knows you’ll turn on me, maybe he’ll finally trust you enough to tell you what’s going on. You’re a pretty good liar sometimes.” You urge him and you know this is an insane idea but it's what you have. The Titans will never figure out Crane's plan without some inside help. They need it.

“You said I was shit liar.” Jason argues, pointing the granola bar at you.

“Well, to me.” You chuckle softly. “I always know when you’re lying but I think you can lie pretty well when you actually need to. I mean, no one figured out you were Robin. And I think that was obvious. I met you and all I thought was that it made sense.”

“This is fucking stupid.” Jason nods his head casually.

“Yeah, well, this whole thing has been fucking stupid. You go back to Crane, work with him and I’ll stay with the Titans. You call the burner when you find shit out and I loop Dick in. You don’t have to physically be home to work with us. You find out, the Titans bring in Crane and shut down whatever shit he’s got going on, then we kill him and you go home.” You explain simply and Jason hates just how convincing you can be.

You make a good point. Jason knows he can lie his ass off, he just wanted to argue. He's worried though because Crane has a way of knowing Jason is lying. It's how he found out about you from the beginning of it all. Jason couldn't just lie because Crane would know. It wasn't exactly a life-or-death situation then though. Maybe Jason wasn't trying all that hard to get away with lying then anyway. Crane admitting his plan would be helpful and Crane thinking you turned on Jason would give Jason enough motive to give up on the Titans entirely. It's not a horrible plan but Jason isn't happy about it.

“Alright fucking fine but this is shit and you know that.” Jason lets out a groan.

“I know.” You smile. “But, it’ll be worth it when his prodigie betrays him in the end.” You scrunch your nose, smiling with pride and Jason can see the light come back to your eyes. He thinks you're gonna be okay.

“You know, kinda hot when you got a plan all ready to go.” Jason offers you a cheeky smirk, his eyes raking over you before coming back to your face.

“I do have my moments.” You grin wickedly at him. “Kind of hot when you actually do what I say.”

“Alright, fuck you. Don't get used to it, babe.” Jason chuckles, shaking his head as the white streak flops onto his forehead. “When we doing this?”

“You could head out now, meet up with Crane and I’ll head back to the manor.” You suggest before taking a bite of your granola bar.

“Alright, just, uh, be careful, please. Let me know if shit happens with the Titans. I don’t want them attacking you for this shit.”

“I got it. I’ve been dealing with them the whole time. Don’t worry, Jay.” You smile softly a him as Jason gets to his feet and stands in front of you.

There's something dark in his eyes this time. He's standing over you as if he doesn't really want to leave. His brows are pinching together in the way they always do when he's worried and his jaw is squaring. He's putting all of the pressure onto his good leg, something you still notice immediately. But, he stands as if he's an unmovable force anyway and the smirk drops from his face.

“I’m serious, alright? Be careful.” Jason sucks in a breath and you've never seen him this kind of protective over you before.

“I will, promise.” You offer him a soft nod before Jason reluctantly heads out.

Jason is still hesitant, keeping his stance in front of you and it feels wrong. It always feels wrong to just leave. But, it's not his place to offer something else in place of him leaving anymore. And he also knows the second he walks back to Crane, that'll probably the last time you see each other until it's resolved. You're going to have to go to the Titans and Dick will likely be watching you closely, to make sure you don't get yourself killed or flip sides again. A lot can happen in a day or a few days and you were just almost killed. It scares the ever-living shit out of him, the very thought of losing you the way you lost him. He hates that he's leaving again. It's what he has to do and he knows that but knowing what he has to do to end this, doesn't make the decision any easier.

Jason leans down, placing his hand on your cheek before he rests his forehead against yours. Your eyes fall closed, a soft and subtle smile coming to your lips.

"Don't do anything fucking stupid and for once, listen to Dick and Gar, alright?" Jason asks, pulling just enough to see your face.

Your brows pull together. "You want me to listen to Dick?"

Jason is still mad at him and maybe Dick wants him dead still. That's always a possibility but something Jason knows, now that he's thinking with a clear head is that Dick does try to protect the Titans. They're his family and he's the leader. And Gar is one of your best friends. The two of them won't let anything happen to you if they can stop it. He knows you taking off had nothing to do with Gar and after last night, Jason thinks Gar would try to actually stop you if it happens again.

Jason's jaw squares, reluctant to say it again. "I'm serious. You got fucking shot." Jason quips.

"Okay." You agree softly, knowing if Jason is asking you to listen to anyone, you should probably take the advice. It always means Jason is very worried and serious. Two things that are a bit unsettling. "I will, promise." You smile softly before pressing your forehead to his for a second. "Now, go, okay? I'll be fine."

Jason nods his head, pulling away and dropping his hand. "I'll call when I find something out." Jason offers one last nod before he turns and darts out of the room.

Jason heads out to an old mechanic shop to meet up with Crane and for the life of him, he has no idea why he's even agreed to this. The only thing he wants to do right about now is kill Crane. He wants to fight him and shoot him and cause him horrendous pain for what he's put you through. He could have killed you and Jason swore no one would ever get away with it. But, now he has to walk in here and pretend he's not pissed about it. He's a good liar, but he doesn't know if he'll actually be able to withhold his blooming hatred.

When Jason meets with Crane, Crane seems to be acting perfectly normal, seemingly believing Jason will always be on his side no matter what. It's something Jason finds to be interesting because he already knew Crane was arrogant. But, he didn't think he was arrogant enough to think Jason would just be perfectly fine with him after being drugged, tricked, lied to, and used. He just shot Tim, possibly ruining his chances of actually going home. He could have killed you. Jason already threatened Crane but Crane seems perfectly fine with everything and Jason's wondering if that's because he agreed to meet.

"You could have fucking killed her." Jason starts with gritted teeth as they walk into the car garage.

"Yeah...sorry about that." Crane says casually. "She was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Sometimes, there are necessary casualties."

Crane is confident in his ability to manipulate Jason. Crane didn't have a single thing on the kid and Jason still spilled everything about Batman and the Titans. It was easy. It might become more difficult right now, but Crane is confident they'll overcome the current hurdle. After all, for the time being, Crane does still need Jason for his own disposal.

Jason wants to explode right here and take Crane out with him. A necessary causality? That's how you and Tim are being referred to? There is no such thing as a necessary causality when it comes to innocent people. Innocent people don't have to die. They don't have to be hurt. It was a choice Crane made in order to get you out of the way. To show Jason Crane is the one still running the show. And Jason has to stand here and pretend like this is all fine and lie. He's ready for this whole thing to be done and over with.

"You were right anyway." Jason sucks up his pride and do as you tell him. For that alone, Jason should get to kill him after this. "She was going to turn me in. It was all a setup, that's why she was even there."

Crane seems to perk up with Jason's words and he's hoping Crane believes him. "I did tell you she couldn't be trusted. That must be so hard to handle right now. But, see, now you know who has your back." Crane offers an eery smile. "Do I need to finish the job now?" Crane asks bluntly and he is definitely asking to gauge Jason's reaction. He doesn't miss the way Jason's hands turn into fists at his sides with his knuckles turning white.

"No." Jason states. "I'll do it." He states simply, releasing his hands.

"Good. Then you'll have nothing to worry about." Crane pats Jason's shoulder and Jason is ready to change the subject. He hopes that'll be enough bait for now.

"What the fuck is this?" Jason asks, switching the conversation as he looks around.

"This is where the victors go to rest their weary heads." Crane says.

"We didn't win." Jason argues. "They were gonna take me back but you fucked it all up." Sure, Crane did manage to poison the water but from where Jason is standing, it doesn't seem like too many people have been affected and with the alert going out, less people will likely drink the water. They didn't win anything.

"So you had a moment." Crane states simply, completely unbothered. "I've had plenty of them myself. Let bygones by bygones. I forgive you." Crane says before he pulls the cover off a yellow sports car. He lets out a sigh, as if to be pleased by the vehicle. "Sprezzatara."

Jason just rolls his eyes before he leans against the car, resting his back against the A frame. He's annoyed and he wants to get out of here. The hell if Crane forgiving him for? As far as Jason is concerned, he thinks getting him drugged was payback enough for him dealing the drug out behind his back. And Crane seems to be growing a little annoyed with him, too as he lets out a sigh before closing the garage door using the button hanging from a cable.

"Show some respect." Crane says sternly. "Sit." Crane depends, lightly gesturing towards a chair in front of a desk with a computer.

Jason does as told, sitting down and slouching in his seat.

"You know who Edward Bernays is?" Crane asks.

"The sauce guy?" Jason questions.

"Eggs and bacon." Crane says, taking a seat beside Jason. "Classic American breakfast. Do you know why?"

"What's this have to do with--"

"Pork farmers paid Edward Bernays to make it so. See, but Edward Bernays, he had this...this uncle, right? Dear old Uncle Sigmund. As in Sigmund Freud. See, and Freud taught Edward Bernays how the human mind worked. And Edward, he worked the human mind. He didn't sell the proletariat bacon. He sold them the idea that a hearty breakfast was what every doctor thought was best for them. After that, the bacon, it sold itself. Edward Bernays understood that an idea is the most powerful weapon we have." Crane explains before he swivels in his chair to face the computer, Jason eying him carefully and he's getting a really bad feeling about all of this. "It's not the product, it's how you sell it." Crane says as he brings up footage of Nightwing fighting some bad guys and Crane is in some type of editing software. "And Gotham is in need of a new product. We now interrupt your regularly scheduled program to bring you a message for the good people of Gotham.

Jason leans forward as the video starts to play, Crane already having sent it out as alert to every person in Gotham City.

Oh no.

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denimini · 7 months

Text

What is going on with Jimin, Jungkook and Jikook?

Warning: long post

I've been a BTS fan since early 2017. Back in the day, I ran this blog here, analyzing a lot of Jikook moments, but life sort of took over, and I stopped having the time for it. However, I never stopped being a fan and observing BTS and Jikook through the years. There's a lot said and written already about the supposed video of JK, but here are my two cents.

To me, the most logical explanation for that video is that this really is Jungkook. The layout of the apartment matches (yes, even the position of the security system, if you have ever watched JKs lives, you'd know that it actually is at his shoulder height, just like in the video), the dog looks like Bam, the couch is the same and this definitely looks like JK. There's also another video of the man in this apartment, alone, shirtless, and having a whole tattoo sleeve on his right arm just like JK. Obviously, we don't know for sure, but it looks like it's him. People say it was filmed in late Feb, early March, and I agree. JK had the same hair then, the outfits look warm, like winter clothes and not to forget, that when JK was stalked in his gym (late of February) there were a lot of fuss about a girl being there with him, so it all checks out in my book.

Now, what the video shows isn't that scandalous. A boy hugging a girl from behind and them playfighting/tickling each other or whatever. It isn't overly explicit. It could mean a lot of things, but it's clear the people are at the very least physically comfortable with each other. It's a short video. We don't know if they're even alone, but it looks like it. There are a number of possibilities for whom this person is to JK: a long-time girlfriend, a casual hook-up, a one night stand, or just a friend.

We'll probably never know for sure. What we do know is that this is an unacceptable invasion of privacy, and the person who took those videos should be sued for all they are worth. I hope we all agree on that, yes?

Now, if this girl is someone JK is dating/has dated/has slept with, where does that leave his and JM's relationship?

In my eyes, as someone who's observed them for literal years now, there's no way JM and JK have always had a strictly platonic relationship. Too much just doesn't add up. Sure, technically, they could be bestest friends with great chemistry, but as someone who is now 30 years old, I don't think I've seen this type of chemistry between people ever be just platonic. At times, it looked too much like sexual tension for it to easily be dubbed as "friendly".

My theory is this (keep in mind these are still just assumptions):

In 2017-2020, pre-Covid era, JM and JK spent A LOT of time together, basically all of it. BTS were super active, they didn't have any breaks. They were always working. Always on tour and doing smth else. JM and JK were pretty young back then (20-24) and this is typically the time when someone discovers their sexuality and starts experimenting, and I believe that at some point they did this together. They were best friends but also had this weird tension and air around them and I think they could've started a physical relationship back then. The members teasing them hear and there about being a couple, also kind of supports this, though of course, it doesn't prove anything.

Contrary to other people, I don't belive they only just fucked. It's very hard to have sex with someone who you are very close to otherwise, who you love and admire as a person, and not catch romantic feelings for them, so I think they did more than fucking. Whether they had a serious relationship or decided not to label it much, due to MS coming up, the group being in jeopardy or other reasons, I tend to think that other than sex, they also had feelings.

Side note: In any case, they were figuring thinks out about themselves as individuals, as well as a pair. I think maybe this is the time JM realized he is definitely bisexual (which he proudly expressed in his photobook of last year in my opinion). Idk what Jk figured out for himself, if anything.

Anyhow, by 2020‐2021 it seemed they had some sort of agreement about what/who they were to each other. At times they could have been on and off. There might have been other people/partners in-between, but I think they were mainly together by this point. It even looked like they lived together for some time. The fact they always took the same car and they were together on JKs birthday night when they first had number 1 on hot 100 sort of proves it. JM's birthday live in 2021 was also sus af (the way he was blushing while mentioning JK and their whole convos, very sus).

I think before Covid they had smth somewhat stable but then Covid hit. Their schedules changed, it was a tough period overall. Suddenly, they were not working and traveling so much, they were staying in SK. I think this was the time things started getting much more real and different. MS was also in the near horizon. Maybe one of them wanted a more committed relationship, and the other wasn't ready. Maybe they were both afraid. Maybe they tried and it didn't really work out. Maybe one finally realized his sexuality and the other had doubs. Whatever it was, the feelings of affection were still there. Chemistry as well. Proof: JM bday live in 2021 was just crazy, the way he blushed when JK was mentioned and the way the spoke to each other... man. Also, the way the were at PTD L.A. The way JK answered questions about JM etc.

So , all that connected them as people was still there, but I think their relationship come late 2021-early 2022 was definitely more unstable. Who knows what happened then. Personally, I don't believe in the theory that they opened their relationship, rather I believe by the second half of 2022, due to whatever reasons, things were simple mostly off between them. I believe they stayed this way all through the second half of the year and at least the first 4 months of 2023. They were friends, their families still loved and supported each other (JK's mom made seaweed soup for JM's bday, which one does for family) but that's about it. They weren't living together anymore, as well.

The beginning of 2023 we saw a very busy JM and a very not busy JK. Sure, they still commented on their welives but it seemed they didn't meet each other that often. Jm was working, JK was at home and occasionally with Tae. Yeah, JK watched a lot of JM content and often invited him over, but he also didn't know when his promotions will be over and it seemed they haven't seen each other for some time and JK was missing JM. I think if they truly were a serious couple back then, they would still have found the time to meet each other no matter how busy one or the other was, especially considering they live in the same city, and it wasnt the case. I don't think JK would have to resort to watching hours of JM's content just to satisfy his need-for-JM thirst, if they were a couple back then.

So, yeah, I think they were not more than friends by this point, for sure, which also ties up pretty well with the timing of the recent leaked video (February-March). To me it seems that JK and JM probably saw other people in that period, at least JK, JM was pretty damn busy then. Maybe they had some serious partners even, maybe just hook-ups here and there. Maybe this was JK's time to explore more of his heterosexual side, who knows. I don't think he stopped caring for JM in some capacity. In fact it kind of looked like he longed for his company but for one reason or another, they were simply not that much in each other's lives in the first quarter of 2023.

But then something weird happened around June-July. First JM is all scratched up from something (presumably Bam) indicating he saw JK and spent time with him. Then Seven came out and JM flew to NY. There they spend a long, fun weekend amid promotions. It wasn't a secret but they seemed to want to keep private and didn't really want to talk about it , judging by the way JK answered the question about JM being in NY as well. JM was practically silent. Then they returned and that welive happened. The one where they openly flirted, JM said he could handle JK naked, JK blushed like a school girl and tried everything in his power to get to JM but JM said "I'm not that easy". That welive. Idk about you, but that welive didn't seem platonic to me at all and if I had been JK's partner at the time, I would definitely be very angry with his behaviour. I don't think JK is disrespectful and a cheater, and neither is JM for that matter, so I believe there's no way any of them had a partner when that welive happened. I simply refuse to belive they are that type of people.

So, my conclusion is they were both single then and something definitely happend in July and NY. They returned somewhat different and they still kind of are. Jk posted pics of NY to Twitter for the first time. Jm shared a pic from then for JKs bday (shirtless, as we all know) and then recently another pic from a boat that could have been from back then, as well. The whole way they're acting offline and online strangely reminds me a lot of the time after their trip to Tokyo, actually. The way JM has been posting about JK very much give me nostalgia about the way he used to post Jikook often in 2017-2018 before he withdrew from social media. But maybe that's just me 🤷‍♀️

Anyway, to finish this long post I will say this. I don't know what Jikook were and are to each other and unless, it is explicitly denied the person in the video is JK, I will believe that it's him. But also, unless it is confirmed he currently has a girlfriend, I will have my doubts. The video is old and in any case, it doesn't prove much other than the fact JK is maybe into women (solely or also into them). This video though doesn't automatically negate everything I've seen between Jikook through the years. In some ways, it confirms what I've been thinking for a long time now. Unless JM and JK personally shut down any rumors about them and deny any romantic connection or confirm a relationship with someone else , I still believe that at some point in their lived their relationship crossed the platonic line.

Whether that was in the past or is currently true, I only can guess, but to me there's no way these two were always, all these years, just only friends.

For now, I will observe how JK, JM and Hybe are acting after the leaked videos and go from there. It will also be indicative.

Peace.

#jikook #jungkook #jimin #bts

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tsunflowers · 1 year

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so my plan for dealing with the harassment I’ve been receiving is to ignore them completely bc I truly do not give a shit about what they have to say. but I do think it could be helpful to kind of analyze their tactics bc they’ve done this to other people and may do it to more in the future

on thursday i got 5-10 anonymous messages either asking or accusing me of being friends with a pedophile and groomer and helping them find minors to target. I obviously haven’t done this and I don’t know who first claimed this or where. I also don’t know if it’s connected to the vitriol that appeared later but I’m inclined to think so bc both groups named a certain tumblr user (who I will not name bc they’ve been dealing with this for a while and probably just want to stay out of it). my impression of the anons in my ask at that time is that there were multiple people and some of them were sincerely worried that I was doing something nasty. i find this somewhat worrisome bc if that incident really is connected to the later harassment it means that the person who has been making what seems like hundreds of accounts just to call people cunts is capable of coming off as trustworthy and concealing the depths of their hateful behavior. looking at the situation as a whole it does feel like that was the first strike intended to destabilize me and turn people against me before the real harassment campaign began

for some reason they started by replying to my pinned post, adding over a hundred violent and hateful comments. I don’t think this was the best tactic bc it honestly took me a while to notice. I assume this started on friday but maybe it was thursday and I wasn’t paying attention to the replies on my pinned. when i turned off replies on friday they moved to my ask and I got probably between ten and twenty of the same awful messages. most of the comments were graphic rape and death threats, but a lot were also accusing me of being a terf

this is why I think the person or persons behind this are pretending to be trans women in order to make trans women look violent and unreasonable. I’ve deleted all the asks and replies bc fuck that shit but what I remember from some of them is stuff like “no one cares that you have a period every month, bleeder” (??) and “cissies like you will never be as beautiful as us real women.” I don’t know any trans women who would say stuff like that in actual rage. “normal women and cis women” has a layer of irony to it so i can only imagine it as a joke or being said to someone you know is a terf and will get super mad. it’s just not on the same level as the graphic violence being described in other comments. but if you’re a trans woman and you call cis women bleeders when you’re actually furious with them let me know

unlike the first wave of anonymous asks I suspect these comments came from a single person, or maybe two or three at most. the accounts had no posts and not even a bio so they were clearly made just for this purpose. which is really sad lmao. I didn’t notice much variation in typing style and they were universally against me. that’s why I think these hundreds of accounts were made by the same person or group, while i think the anons I received on thursday who had different typing styles and varied from already against me to just concerned and confused were more likely to be separate and sincere people

I’ve heard from another person that when someone who received similar harassment said they would abandon their blog they were suddenly swarmed by terfs trying to comfort them and saying look at what those awful trans women did to this innocent cis woman. obviously my suspicion is that those terfs are the same people making the accounts to spew hate speech and they just switched to a different set of accounts once the violence had its intended effect

unfortunately I don’t know what we can learn from this, other than that there are terfs targeting people in the tokusatsu fandom and they have it out for one person in particular who they sometimes name when harassing others. I don’t have any sense of who’s behind this bc they’ve spent the whole time hiding behind anons and burner accounts. it would be so much easier if I was getting hate from people’s actual accounts that i could simply block

also not talking about this is so hard for me bc I love complaining and posting about everything that passes through my head so I have to share one anecdote that I think is so funny. I posted a message i got from a url that was like takerutenkuujiiii that said “I hope you get female genital mutilation so you can experience the hurt you’ve caused others” and I said “he wouldn’t say that” and someone actually came to my inbox and called me “dumb” for saying that the famously kind and sweet protagonist of children’s show kamen rider ghost would not wish genital mutilation on anyone

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intimidating-fettuccine · 3 months

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I feel like Night Terrors is just old and odd. Friends or partners, his show of affection could be old fashioned sometimes,, ex. draping his jacket around you when you shiver or opening doors for you. I have a feeling he’d be a “ladies first” type of gentleman. (if you could even call him one).

I also feel that he always has a unreadable grumpy expression on his face, like, all the time, no matter the situation. I’ve been starting to think that that’s just his relaxed face. And as someone who really pays attention to people’s facial expressions, I would probably mistake him and think that he’s upset with me or something—especially if he’s very silent.

Like you said, about him not really socializing and knowing how to talk or act with people, i feel like he’d be quite hard to understand what he means with his words, i feel that he would be very enigmatic with the people he does talk to—always with the side stepping replies, if you ask him; “Do you like being/hanging out with me?” he would probably reply with; “I don’t mind your company.” or; “Maybe I do maybe I don’t.” I feel like he would be THAT person, or if he asks you to go somewhere with him, since he probably rarely does this, you’d be a little teasing with him, “and would this be a date you are asking me out on?” I feel like he’d reply with, “if you want it to be.”

But i ALSOO feel like he’d be a really like, serious person. hmm very straight forward too. and always meaning exactly what he says. like if he asks you to sleep with him, he’s not leading on to sex, he literally just wants you to sleep next to him 😭.

Last one I promise 😔..do you think he’d be either purposely or accidentally demanding? i mean with his past and stuff, i feel like he could come off as harsh with a lot of things he says. meaning it or not.

I know he’s not a main character on your blog.. but i can NOT get over this man. i’m blaming the anons that got me into this pit

OKK… i’m just rambling atp. i’ll stop and save you the pain, this has already gotten too long,, but PLEASEE give me your thoughts and input on this stuffs.!!

Listen I love both Candy AND Terrors and I am more than happy to ramble about them any fucking time. Any characters that aren't popular I love giving extra attention. But you're right!

Starting from the top, he probably is pretty gentlemanly, even is he's gruff about it. He holds open doors for you, if you're cold he'll give you his jacket, he'll order for you at restaurants, he'll pay for you. Part of it is because he's a bit gentlemanly, but also I feel like he just views himself as the one in charge between the two of you, and since you're so important to Candy he does his best to take care of you for him.

He totally has resting bitch face. It's not intentional, but he's just naturally a frowner, even if he's in a relatively good mood he doesn't really smile all that often, if anything he just frowns slightly less. Get super duper close to him over time though, and he'll spare you a few small smiles every now and then.

Also, you're very correct with his replies. He doesn't want to seem too excited about things or appear more enthusiastic than he is, but he also has no idea what a normal reply would be. "Do you like this food?" "It's alright." He says, meaning that he actually really DOES like it, but he doesn't know how to express that. Ask him a "Does this outfit look good on me?" though and he ends up standing there for a few moments trying to think of what to do. He answers you with a "I think it's nice." said quite softly, meaning he thinks you look lovely.

And he also totally does mean things literally. He would absolutely just mean for you to share a bed with him and sleep if he asks "Would you like to sleep together/would you like to share a bed with me" he does not mean anything nefarious, and he'd probably be much more obvious if he actually wanted to do something more adult.

When it comes to being demanding... I think it's usually accidental. Like with him not knowing how to be polite and sociable he ends up making demands when he means a request. "Get me a soda." "Come sit over here." "Stop what you are doing and come here." "Bring me that." He's not even trying to be demanding but the man has never had to say the word please a single time in his life before so everything comes out as a statement instead of a request. If he is being intentionally demanding though, you can tell the difference in his tone of voice. Also, you could train him to say please, but he'll only do it for you and it's very begrudgingly at first.

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanons #creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta x reader #slender mansion mayhem #candy pop #candy pop headcanon #candy pop headcanons #candy pop x reader

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shinelikethunder · 5 months

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Hello there! I hope you don’t mind me just dropping into your asks like this, but by all means def feel free to just delete this if so, it is kind of a weird ask.

This is the anon from the computer blog asking about a private laptop for collage! After doing (a small amount of) research into Linux, one thing that’s super confusing to me, is… how does one know which distro to use? You mentioned in the replies of the post that you use Ubuntu Linux, which seems to be one of the more popular ones. Would you recommend — and if so, why? Is it good for privacy, do you think? The best? Does the user need to have a good deal of experience with computers to keep it running? (I’ve never used a laptop before but I don’t mind trying to learn stuff)

Also this is an EXTREMELY stupid question my apologies, but how….. exactly do you put Linux on a laptop? OP from my ask said to buy a laptop with no OS but is that something you can do? I’d think so, since 0P works with computer and stuff as their job, but Reddit says that it’s not really possible and that you should just “buy like a Windows laptop and scrap the software”??? Is that… correct? How did you install Linux on your laptop — did y ou have to remove software off it or did you, as OP says, manage to find a laptop with no OS?

Again, feel free to ignore if you don’t wanna put in the time/effort to reply to this, I absolutely don’t mind — it’s a lot of stuff I’m asking and you didn’t invite it all, so ofc feel free to delete the ask if you’d like!

ha, you've zeroed in on one of the big reasons Linux is kind of a contrarian choice for me to recommend: the wild proliferation of distros, many of them hideously complex to work with. luckily, the fact that most of them are niche offshoots created by and for overly-technical nerds makes the choice easier: you don't want those. you want one of the largest, best-supported, most popular ones, with a reputation for being beginner-friendly. the two biggies are Ubuntu and Linux Mint; i'd recommend focusing your research there.

this isn't JUST a popularity-contest thing: the more people use it, the more likely you are to find answers if you're having trouble or plugging a weird error message into google, and the greater the variety of software you'll find packaged for easy install in that distro. some combination of professional and broad-based community support means you'll find better documentation and tutorials, glitches will be rarer and get fixed faster, and the OS is less likely to be finicky about what hardware it'll play nice with. the newbie-friendly ones are designed to be a breeze to install and to not require technical fiddling to run them for everyday tasks like web browsing, document editing, media viewing, file management, and such.

info on installation, privacy, personal endorsement, etc under the cut. tl;dr: most computers can make you a magic Linux-installing USB stick, most Linuces are blessedly not part of the problem on privacy, Ubuntu i can firsthand recommend but Mint is probably also good.

almost all Linux distros can be assumed to be better for privacy than Windows or MacOS, because they are working from a baseline of Not Being One Of The Things Spying On You; some are managed by corporations (Ubuntu is one of them), but even those corporations have to cater to a notoriously cantankerous userbase, so most phoning-home with usage data tends to be easy to turn off and sponsored bullshit kept minimally intrusive. the one big exception i know of is Google's bastard stepchild ChromeOS, which you really don't want to be using, for a wide variety of reasons. do NOT let someone talk you into installing fucking Qubes or something on claims that it's the "most private" or "most secure" OS; that's total user-unfriendly overkill unless you have like a nation-state spy agency or something targeting you, specifically.

how to install Linux is also not a dumb question! back in the day, if you wanted to, say, upgrade a desktop computer from Windows 95 to Windows 98, you'd receive a physical CD-ROM disc whose contents were formatted to tell the computer "hey, i'm not a music CD or a random pile of backup data or a piece of software for the OS to run, i want you to run me as the OS next time you boot up," and then that startup version would walk you through the install.

nowadays almost anyone with a computer can create a USB stick that'll do the same thing: you download an Ubuntu installer and a program that can perform that kind of formatting, plug in the USB stick, tell the program to put the installer on it and make it bootable, and then once it's done, plug the USB stick into the computer you want to Linuxify and turn it on.

Ubuntu has an excellent tutorial for every step of the install process, and an option to do a temporary test install so you can poke around and see how you like it without pulling the trigger irreversibly: https://ubuntu.com/tutorials/install-ubuntu-desktop

having a way to create a bootable USB stick is one reason to just get a Windows computer and then let the Linux installer nuke everything (which i think is the most common workflow), but in a pinch you can also create the USB on a borrowed/shared computer and uninstall the formatter program when you're done. i don't have strong opinions on what kind of laptop to get, except "if you do go for Linux, be sure to research in advance whether the distro is known to play nice with your hardware." i'm partial to ThinkPads but that's just, like, my opinion, man. lots of distros' installers also make it dead simple to create a dual-boot setup where you can pick between Windows and Linux at every startup, which is useful if you know you might have to use Windows-only software for school or something. keep in mind, though, that this creates two little fiefdoms whose files and hard-disk space aren't shared at all, and it is not a beginner-friendly task to go in later and change how much storage each OS has access to.

i've been using the distro i'm most familiar with as my go-to example throughout, but i don't really have a strong opinion on Ubuntu vs Mint, simply because i haven't played around with Mint enough to form one. Ubuntu i'll happily recommend as a beginner-friendly version of Linux that's reasonably private by default. (i think there's like one install step where Canonical offers paid options, telemetry, connecting online accounts, etc, and then respects your "fuck off" and doesn't bug you about it again.) by reputation, Mint has a friendlier UI, especially for people who are used to Windows, and its built-in app library/"store" is slicker but offers a slightly more limited ecosystem of point-and-click installs.

(unlike Apple and Google, there are zero standard Linux distros that give a shit if you manually install software from outside the app store, it's just a notoriously finicky process that could take two clicks or could have you tearing your hair out at 3am. worth trying if the need arises, but not worth stressing over if you can't get it to work.)

basic software starter-pack recommendations for any laptop (all available on Windows and Mac too): Firefox with the uBlock Origin and container tab add-ons, VLC media player, LibreOffice for document editing. the closest thing to a dealbreaking pain in the ass about Linux these days (imo) is that all the image and video editing software i know of is kinda janky in some way, so if that's non-negotiable you may have to dual-boot... GIMP is the godawfully-clunky-but-powerful Photoshop knockoff, and i've heard decent things about Pinta as a mid-weight image editor roughly equivalent to Paint.net for Windows.

#anonymous #recs #linux

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runwayrunway · 11 months

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No. 2 - Kalitta Air

I’m really thrilled by how much you all enjoyed my Lufthansa rant. Here’s something...a little different. Just to rub in that I don’t inherently hate liveries just for having a mostly white fuselage, I wanted to talk about an example of that being done a lot better. I will also be doing so in a length which will probably be a bit more typical of this blog. I hope you all enjoy it regardless!

Kalitta Air (formerly Connie Kalitta Services and American International Airways; callsign “Connie”) is a cargo airline headquartered in Ypsilanti, Michigan. You see their planes around a lot if you randomly click on flightradar24 flights, especially over North America, but they don’t carry passengers, so to my knowledge they’re not a household name. At least, the friends I surveyed had never heard of them.

(image: kalitta air)

But their low profile conceals some pretty stylish planes. So, let’s discuss!

Like I said, I don’t blanket dislike mostly-white liveries just because most of them are super boring and Lufthansa’s in particular is terrible! So I wanted to follow it up immediately with an example of a mostly white livery which I really like - Kalitta Air’s sleek and iconic paint job, which the airline adopted (as far as I can tell from digging around) in the late 1980s.

It truly feels like Connie Kalitta’s main gig as a racecar driver transferred to the look of the planes with his name written on the side. (...what is it with racecar drivers and starting airlines? I mean, two nickels, but...)

The majority of Kalitta Air’s fleet are Boeing 747s, which does add to the look, in my opinion. Their fleet even contains the last 747-400 ever built! The iconography feels like it transitions well into the hump, and the entire thing looks balanced.

(image: kalitta air)

I’ll be honest, something is definitely lost on the remainder of the airline’s fleet, made up of Boeing 777s, in a pretty major way, but it doesn’t cancel out just how much I love the look of the 747s. Still, because the airline has kept this livery for so long, we can look back to the past to experience it on all sorts of shapes.

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I still prefer the 747. That’s pretty incredible - I’m of the opinion that nearly all liveries look their best on a TriStar, so that opinion is a testament to just how incredibly good this livery looks on the Queen. It’s an acceptable-to-good livery on any plane, don’t get me wrong, but the core 747 fleet wears it transcendently well. (I am ignoring the 777s.)

If you’ve seen a Kalitta Air plane for more than a few seconds it’s likely the pictured N700CK, which got to flip a few assorted vehicles with her jet blasts in the 2007 Mythbusters episode “Supersized Myths”. Their 747s have been used in other media, but this is the main example. I think they couldn’t have picked a more striking plane to use.

Just look at the thing! The combination of red and gold makes it feel flashy and fast, a feeling which is added to by the swooping hockey-stick cheatlines which add a lot of interest to the fuselage with very little paint. It makes the plane feel streamlined and almost reminds me of the sort of paint jobs used on early high-speed trains.

(image: Science Museum Group Collection)

The font itself even feels fast, while being massive and quite legible even despite the shape of the A, and framed nicely on each side by the little wings. It does look a little like if a racecar was a cargo plane, and I love it. It’s not exactly maximalist, but every detail from the letters’ even heights to the ratio of gold to red feels perfect.

If you’re going to do a mostly white paint job (and there are plenty of reasons that airlines generally prefer to), this is how you do it.

Final Grade: A

N.B. For the sake of my own mental health, I am not going to touch on the atrocious revision of two years ago in this post. At the least, it looks like they’re not repainting old airframes and they have a small-ish fleet so they’re not bulk-buying new ones or anything, which means this livery will probably be around for the remainder of the service life of many fairly new freighters. Because of that, I do not consider the classic hockey stick Kalitta livery to be retired, and will not be tagging it as such. That said, since it’s not their current livery for new planes, I also am not classifying it as a 2020s livery.

#tarmac fashion week #grade: a #era: 1980s #era: 1990s #era: 2000s #era: 2010s #region: north america #region: united states #kalitta air #cargo carriers

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my-my-my · 1 year

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hey!! i love your writing and your blog. currently my aizen worms are wriggling in my brain so could i request the SFW alphabet for aizen?

I've never done the alphabets before, so this will be fun!! I'm putting it under a cut because it is LONG. I hope you enjoy. I am pre-facing this as Muken!Aizen.

A - AFFECTION | How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?

Aizen is affectionate in private overall - he doesn't like to be overly dotting and sweet in public. The most you'll get is him holding your hand and maybe a peck on the cheek. It doesn't mean he's callous, but his affection for you is for your eyes only. No one else is privvy to that.

B - BEST FRIEND | What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?

I think he would be an interesting best friend! He’d be very thoughtful and patient. He’d probably give the best advice lol. I think for a friendship to start though, you have to be at his level on same way, whether that’s his power or intelligence. Or even having the same beliefs.

But he’d bat for you - he’d always been in your corner. I think Aizen’s loyalty is to himself, but if he had you as a friend, he’d also stay true to you. The only way it would go badly (imo) is if you show loyalties to other people, or even ideologies. I think he would drop you very fast.

C - CUDDLES | Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?

No, I don’t see him as a cuddler, but he would hug you if you needed/wanted it. I see him as a big spoon though. I think his embraces are all encompassing- he surrounds you with warmth and it fills you with a sense of calm. He’d make sure you’re relaxed before letting go.

I do think Aizen wouldn’t mind if you sat in his lap though. He seems like the kinda person to enjoy that 🤭

D - DOMESTIC | Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?

I don't think Aizen would want to settle down in a conventional sense, unless it benefited him in the long run lol. Not necessarily because he has commitment issues or anything, but it's not a priority for him to be domestic in a sense. He's domestic if he has to be domestic.

It's why I HC him at cleaning and cooking out of necessity, not necessarily because he enjoys it lol.

E - ENDING | If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?

Depends on the partner, I think. If Aizen suspects them of cheating or something like that, I think Aizen would toy with them emotionally (because he's a creep).

If it's just a mutual loss of love, I think he would be honest with the person and let them go. There's no explanations though (unless they wanted it), but I think Aizen has some tact in how to he would break up with a partner.

F - FIANCÉ | How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?

I mention this in D, but I don't think he's necessarily domestic, or interested in commitment unless it has value to him. I do think he would want exclusivity/monogamous relationships, and maybe a marriage proposal is a way to do it in his eyes lol.

I think if Aizen were to proposal, there would be a short engagement period. I think the man has the means to give his partner the wedding of their dreams (if they're interested).

G - GENTLE | How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?

He can be gentle, but he's not inherently gentle imo. That being said, if you're having a bad day, he would always be there to listen to you vent and console you. He knows when to be gentle, and he's more than willing to show you that side of himself than to anyone else.

H - HUGS | Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?

I don't think he particular cares for hugs, but he does like your gentle hugs. It always catches him off guard how soft you are and how he feels his heart beat steadying in your arms. It relaxes him.

I - I LOVE YOU | How fast do they say the L-word?

Oh you'll def be the one saying it first. I think Aizen is super guarded as a person, but when he says "I love you", it would be in a very surprising, private moment between the two of you.

I think those words carry a lot of weight for him, and he doesn't want to say them so casually - he would need to be certain of his relationship with you, and of you as an individual. He was/is a lonely man - I don't think he would be so careless and share those words with anyone.

J - JEALOUSY | How jealous do they get? What do you they do when they're jealous?

I don't think he gets jealous per se, I think he sees it as an emotion that's beneath him, but he does get a bit... possessive from time to time. Maybe you're spending a lot more time with Shinji or Urahara, and he doesn't like that!

I'd like to think when he gets a bit jealous, some kisses and hand holding, makes him feel reassured.

K - KISSES | What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?

His kisses are passionate and intense. He wants to sweep you off your feet and leave you breathless. He should be the only one on your mind after he kisses you! He loves your lips, but will also kiss your neck and shoulders and some other places but that's nsfw.

But he likes quick pecks from you, soft kisses on his forehead. It's something very endearing that he didn't get to experience a lot!

L - LITTLE ONES | How are they around children?

I think Aizen would be very patient with children! He may go into teacher mode with them too, but its patience that's the biggest takeaway with how he handles children.

He's inherently a learner and teacher of the world around him, and children, no matter their age, always bring a different view of the world they're discovering for themselves. I think Aizen would be curious to see how a child navigates the world around them, and how they would handle his advice/teaching.

M - MORNING | How are mornings spent with them?

Aizen's an early-bird! He'll have tea/coffee brewing for both of you, maybe some pastries to go with it, as he catches up on the news. I think Aizen would have a plan (for himself at least) on what he's doing day-to-day, even a day-off has a plan lol.

N - NIGHT | How are nights spent with them?

They're quiet - he loves your company the most, and you two don't necessarily have to be doing anything together, but knowing you're near him, puts him at ease. I think Aizen would go out of his way and plan for romantic nights with the two of you, whatever that romance may look for you - but he's thoughtful and considerate. He always makes sure you feel loved and wanted.

O - OPEN | When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?

Aizen is the master of playing the long game. You could be together for a year, and still know very little about him (while he knows almost everything about you). He's private, but I think if you've been with him for a while, the mask and locks crack. He begins opening up a bit about himself, and see how receptive you are to his "ugly truths". It'll take a very patient person to get through to him.

P - PATIENCE | How easily angered are they?

Aizen is super patient. I think he's genuinely one of the most patient characters in the series. You don't fuck around with an organization for over a century without the patience of a saint!

And for you, that patience is even higher. He's very considerate of your feelings and thoughts. Maybe he doesn't agree all the time, but he's not going to get angry.

Q - QUIZZES | How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?

Aizen probably stalked you, let's be real. He knows everything about you, from where you lived as a child, to the precise details of your CV/resume lmao.

R - REMEMBER | What is their favourite moment in your relationship?

I think it would be your reaction to when he first says "I love you", the way your eyes lit up, as you gave him a smile and told him the same. It was the gentleness in your eyes that captivated him, and seared that memory in his mind forever.

S - SECURITY | How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?

Aizen is very protective, but he knows you're strong on your own. I don't think he likes the concept of having a clingy and weak partner - he needs someone on par, or almost as equal to him in intelligence. It's one thing to be physically strong, but if you're dumb as rocks, he's not gonna entertain you.

That being said, he trusts you to know how to handle your own battles, but he's also loyal and protective of you. The moment you need his help, he'll swoop in.

I also think, Aizen is so used to being alone, that the thought of someone defending him, protecting him, would be so foreign. He would be in shock as you helped him up, healed him, etc. He could sense that these are genuine acts of kindness from you, and he makes sure to repay you.

T - TRY | How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?

Aizen is pretty effortless in how they plan dates, anniversaries and other events. He knows you so well, he can probably think of 100,000 ways to surprise you and keep you smiling. He would give you the moon if he could.

And if you asked him for help with chores, he'd help, but don't expect him to be on chore duty forever! Aizen seems to like equality, so I think equal division of chores/labour is more his style.

U - UGLY | What would be some bad habits of theirs?

He'd be the annoying partner who'd finish your sentence for you lol. He knows what you're thinking and it kind of gets annoying. I also don't think he'd be as kind as people project him to be, so when he's callous (with other people), you have to "reign" him in, so to speak. Almost like training him on how to interact with genuine kindness?

I can see him being snippy too with people, and you have to remind him of "patience being a virtue".

V - VANITY | How concerned are they with their looks?

I don't think Aizen is vain, but he does care about his looks a reasonable amount. He knows he's good looking and has probably used it to his advantage lol, but he's not obsessed with his looks.

That being said, he probably cares about the quality of his clothes and attire. His wardrobe (in an AU setting), would likely be higher quality, maybe some luxury designer, but nothing flashy with overbearing logos.

W - WHOLE | Would they feel incomplete without you?

For Aizen, I think a life without you, is something he already knows, is something he's familiar with, and to be honest, something he was expecting until he died. He never imagined meeting someone like you, and how you brought another perspective of life to him.

He thought he had it all figured out, but you keep him on his toes, yet still make time for him, and only him. He loves that about you, and it's not so much that he feels "incomplete", but life is certainly more entertaining and better with you in it.

X - XTRA | A random headcanon

I think Aizen would feel genuine fear/anxiety if he had child(ren) of his own! I think he would try to foster friendships for them so they don't experience the same loneliness he felt.

I also think he has a refined palate.

Y - YUCK | What are some things they wouldn't like either in general or in a partner?

I don't think he'd like an unhygienic partner, and def no nail biters.

Going back to the refined palate headcanon, I don't think he would like a partner who wasn't an adventurous eater to some extent. Not that he's a foodie, but he probably enjoys fine dining, so picky eaters are a big No for him.

Z - ZZZ | What is a sleep habit of theirs?

He drools a bit when he's deep sleeping! And he sleeps on his stomach. I think he trained himself to be a light sleeper so he doesn't get caught off guard. With you though, he always feels relaxed. He loves spooning you, or falling asleep to you humming.

I don't think he likes to read before bed. Bed is for sleeping, so he might skim something, but don't expect a book by his nightside table!

Wow, this was long! I hope you enjoyed this!

#aizen sousuke #sousuke aizen #aizen sosuke #sosuke aizen #bleach #bleach writings #aizen headcanon #aizen #sfw alphabet

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yakuzacanons · 9 months

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I'm loving your blog so much!!! I really enjoy your headcanons! ^w^ May I request a part 2 of the "how they would text you" headcanons? I'd love to see how Ryuji would text!

Yes, absolutely! Also, to the rest of my inbox, I go beddy soon (the movie double feature was like 6 hours and I am exhausted) but I will get to the other asks TOMORROW, pinky promise. Headcanons below da cut as per usual. Goog nite.

Ryuji Goda

Decent at texting but his reply times are terrible. He often just forgets to check his phone. Even if he sees the notification, he's the type of person to think "Oh I'll reply to them soon" and forget because he feels in his brain as if he did already reply by just thinking about it. Sends lots of pictures of clothes, jewelry, and the like and asks what your opinions are on them. He knows what emojis are but can never decipher what emotion they are actually trying to convey. Absolutely not up to date on texting slang and tends to type pretty formally.

Ryuji: I meant to text back earlier but I ended up forgetting because I was so busy, my apoliogies.

You: (¬､¬)

Ryuji: Does that image mean you are mad at me or that you are happy to hear from me?

You: What do YOU think?! ⸨◺_◿⸩

Ryuji: Ah, the former then. That one is particularly scary looking.

Nishikiyama Akira

Probably the fastest texter of all the characters and the quickest to reply. He's usually good at being up to date on more modern things, at least better than Kiryu is. Flirtatious texter and most likely to send "You up?" texts. Totally loves sending you selfies when he's really feeling himself. Also sends pictures of really good views he finds, like from a rooftop in Kamurocho with a great view of the city lights.

Nishiki: Hey, check out the view from this restaurant.

You: Oh wow, very pretty.

Nishiki: It would be even prettier if you were here (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

You: Nishiki!

Nishiki: Lol, sorry, couldn't help myself ★~(◡ω◡✿)

Daigo Dojima

Primarily uses his phone for work so he's pretty quick to check notifications or respond to messages. Prefers phone calls as he can hear your voice and it makes for a nice break from all the other mundane calls or important emails at work. Rarely if ever sends pictures via text and selfies make him camera shy but if you're very close to him, you could totally twist his arm into participating. Surprisingly has a decent grasp on emojis.

You: How're you doing?

Daigo: Tired. Long meeting. ╥﹏╥

You: I believe in you! I'll treat you to dinner afterwards so do your best.

Daigo: Ah, that's very kind, thank you. I look forward to it. ( ◡‿◡ *)

Mine Yoshitaka

The worst texter. He's super dry in his responses, never uses emojis, and is very good at forgetting to check his texts. He mostly uses his cell phone for work so when he isn't work, he has notifications silenced. However, if you're very important to him, he will enable the buzzer on his phone so you can get through to him. In contrast, he's the best at taking pictures of you using a cell phone. Never has his phone out during meals as he doesn't want to be rude. Would prefer to video chat the most as it's the next best thing to actually seeing you.

You: Mine, are you even actually reading my texts?

Mine: Sorry, I was working out.

You: It's okay, you can make it up to me by sending me a post-workout selfie. ٩(◕‿◕)۶

Mine: You think you're funny, huh? Fine, just because I like you.

#yakuza #yakuza headcanons #yakuza imagines #ryu ga gotoku #ryu ga gotoku headcanons #ryu ga gotoku imagines #ryuji goda #mine yoshitaka #daigo dojima #akira nishikiyama #majima megaphone moment

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baddygab-bi · 1 year

Text

This episode explicitly put space between Buck and Eddie, let me explain.

1. “What were you doing before you came over?” it’s a Saturday. Chris was at a friend’s. The writers could’ve said Eddie was hanging out with a friend, could’ve been hanging out with Buck. But they didn’t.

2. “Me and Chris, we’re a team” Explicitly Eddie only mentioned the two of them, though Bobby knows how much Buck is around the two of them. He didn’t have to leave off Buck, but the writers didn’t want to include him in the statement, since Bobby talks about having an important work/life balance and it could be twisted beyond what the writers were aiming for.

3. “I don’t want you to be alone anymore.” Eddie could’ve said he isn’t alone. He could’ve said he has his 118 family. That he has his friends. That he has Buck around all the time. That he’s not alone. But that wasn’t what happened. They had Eddie agree he is alone so they could set up the romantic interest.

Why are they putting space between them? Because if they are working towards one or the both of them having actual, long lasting love interests, they have to make it clear where the other man stands in their life. For Eddie, as of right now, regardless of anything else, based solely on what we see on screen, not digging into beer bottles in a fridge or magnets… For Eddie, they’re saying Buck isn’t as major a person in his life as previously thought. Now, as a viewer and a writer, I don’t like this. Since they do have a very solid best friendship, but the writers of the show all seem to sorta have a different idea of where things are gonna go led by a showrunner who is very explicit in her dislike of Buddie. Yet, I think this episode had multiple opportunities to drop even a single hint of Buck and Eddie being a thing if they wanted to.

At this point, it’s not “keeping them separate to have them grow means they’ll be canon soon” or “they can’t say anything because it’s a slowburn and that means nothing can be shown for a long time”

The exclusion doesn’t mean romance. Maybe it could’ve at one point. It really felt like it was leading somewhere. But now, exclusion just means exclusion. I think the show’s being super clear about things without being explicit, because they know the backlash. They’ll lose more fans and face more anger by keeping Buck and Eddie apart than by putting them together, so they’re going to keep things ambiguous for as long as possible. I know people are probably writing posts about how Eddie didn’t mention Buck at any of those times because “It didn’t need to be said, everyone knows how important Buck is. Everyone knows that Buck’s there.” But like… This is a TV show. 60% of the audience likely doesn’t read fanfiction or blogs, they get their info from the scene. They know what the characters are telling them. They aren’t reading into every line. The writers are writing for them. So, it does have to be said. If they wanted any sorta of hint drop, they’d make that explicit. They had many times tonight they could have. It’s super disappointing that they didn’t, but can’t change that now.

Also, am I the only one who didn’t love the “I don’t panic” call back? Because… he did panic before. He had panic attacks. Whether you say it was due to Ana (which is how it started) or his PTSD (which I think the show wanted it to be), he did have panic attacks to the point where he broke down and saw a therapist. He thought he was having a heart attack due to his panic attacks. They used the callback as a funny line, but to me it sorta erased the progress of having a strong male character actually come to terms with the fact that it’s okay to panic. It’s okay to need help. The callback just felt cheap and I didn’t love it. Ryan shoving pasta into his mouth was funny though.

#911 fox #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 spoilers #buddie #911 s6 spoilers #6b speculation

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eldritch-spouse · 1 year

Note

All this talk of parenthood and babies on here recently made me want to revisit some of the old asks about the staff's parenthood shenanigans but I saw a few of them were gone. Namely the single parent s/o asks. Or maybe I just can't find them because Tumblr's search isn't the best :|.

If they are gone could we see single parent s/o dynamics with Morrell, Nebul, and Gallon (I think those were the people in the ask I don't remember)? I'm a whore for domesticated fluff 🥺

[It's very probable that those are gone anon. Not because I like deleting content willy-nilly, but rather the person who sent those asks had blatantly disrespected one of the few rules I impose here, and as such, I scrubbed them off the blog entirely. I usually keep backups of some of these deleted asks, but not always. I can't find the single-parent one, so I'll just remake it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯]

Morell's a family man. You already got a kiddo? Well that just saves him the trouble of having to work for one! Of course, there'll be more in the future, he assures you, but this saves you both some time. You already know what it's like to parent after all! Morell is super excited to meet the little one, and for such a big scary guy, he's good at making himself seem smaller and offering treats as greeting presents. The shroom has younger cousins who he entertains often with small wood carvings and dad jokes, so chances are this horribly dangerous cannibal will get on your kid's good side way too easily. Morell will hype ideas like camping trips to your kid and then pretend he doesn't have anything to do with it when your child begs to go camping with you and daddy. You can see the glint of victory on the shroom's eyes as soon as that word exits their mouth. Jackpot Piglet. Just wait until they meet the bobbles, the little one won't ever want to say goodbye!

Gallon doesn't really think of himself as prime father material, but he starts warming up to the idea when he realizes your kid is a piece of you, they were made by you, therefore, if he's to ever parent anyone, it should be the child of his cherry. The slime is good at making silly shapes, contorting or otherwise weaving his tendrils in patterns that might amuse the kiddo. What's more, the slime can definitely make kid-friendly drinks, so he can still show off and impress the two of you without having to risk your child wanting to get drunk. He's naturally playful and witty, being a barman means he's heard some of the funniest jokes around and also has some wild (appropriate) stories to tell- He's bound to keep your kid as engrossed in his tales as you. Unfortunately, Gallon does get anxious at times, having to set breaks aside so he can read on parenting. After all, he needs to know what he's doing! Otherwise, you won't even consider him as the great partner he knows he can be. And that won't do. The first time he's called dad or daddy, Gallon is so happy that all his tendrils curl in glee, probably making your kid burst out laughing while you sweat in anxiety.

//-//-//

[I did find a backup of a single-parent ask with Nebul.]

Hey, you didn't forget what I said in that ask, did you? "Looking forward to it, but not exactly dad material".

Nebul looks forward to being a dad in the same way a wildlife biologist looks forward to the opportunity to study a brand new animal. He's not interested in it from a genuine, wholesome desire to start a family, this is just another opportunity to learn. And, well, find out how he can manipulate you more easily by having this child (or children) take a liking to him.

Now of course, this apathetic, disturbing thought process is only the initial stage of his journey into impromptu fatherhood, and even if Nebul can be a very detached monster man, he's likely to come to love your kid like a dad would. Why? Well, quite simply, it's a mini you. It's you, but lite. And Nebul loves you, even if he's not the most "just" of partners, so even if he loves animals more than humans, it's really only a matter of time until he's decided that he'll be the best dad there is.

The ability to sense and influence emotions comes in handy with a baby and toddler, for sure, but it's not something he can rely on forever. Nebul knows the baby is upset, but not always how to fix it. Forcibly altering emotions doesn't mean he solved the problem, so there's still a learning curve. He's prone to talking to the kid as if they were an adult at times, using terms they likely won't understand, or telling them truths of life that kids honestly don't need to know (this mf will just straight up be a killjoy abut Santa).

On the plus side, you're dead on about the head mist thing, he's going to make a lot of silly shapes just to get them to laugh, and he'll even tolerate superficial touches to the more solid "orb" part of it. Oh, and guess who that kiddo's gonna have to deal with? Purpur. Purpur loves babies. So much. He's going to be the most hyper oddball pet ever! Your kid will always be entertained. Expect the two to get up to shenanigans. On the fluffy side, I can see Nebul taking you and the kid out to learn about animals and so on. He'd love to nurture some sort of interest for wildlife in the little bugger.

#Morell oc #Gallon oc #Nebul oc

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sophieinwonderland · 4 months

Note

Do systems have a personality outside of being a system? Seems like it’s all you ever talk or think about. What are you avoiding?

DID is part of a dissociative spectrum, the extreme end of it. It involves experiencing frequent distress that interferes with living your life. It isn’t fun. Alters aren’t separate personalities. They’re more akin to emotional states and then “normal” parts that allow for daily functioning. It isn’t anything at all the way media portrays it.

If you want to create a character or an alter ego, go for it. You’re probably super creative, and if that’s how you want to channel your creativity, that’s awesome. Nothing wrong with that.

(This is a draft from September.)

Of course we do! Some would say we have multiple!

Obviously, systems who run system blogs tend to talk a lot about system stuff on those system blogs. It's like how people who run political blogs will talk mostly about political stuff on those political blogs. That's pretty normal.

And naturally, things tend to get filtered through system lenses. "My host thinks X, where I think Y," so systemhood is obviously going to be a big part of our lives in that way.

Anyway, I'm a tulpa and we've never claimed to have DID.

BUT, we have read enough literature on the subject and I don't agree with your description of how it works exactly.

Alters are quite a bit more than the emotional states of singlets, to the point of barely even being comparable. They have their own memories, wants and desires, etc. They also have their own emotional states. (Which is why many papers refer to individual alters as subsystems.)

Alters are frequently reported with their own names and sense of self, their own genders, and even their own species. Fictives have been recorded in the literature, including in The Haunted Self where it was mentioned one patient system had alters from Star Trek.

Alters can communicate with each other and the current fronter through the generation of auditory hallucinations. (Usually in mind-voices.) And can cause other forms of hallucinations or pseudo-hallucinations.

While I think emotional states might be able to become alters or headmates if you compartmentalize them enough (see the Splinters in my Foundations post), I think most descriptions of alters line up much better with John Locke's definition of a person, being "a thinking intelligent Being, that has reason and reflection, and can consider it self as itself, the same thinking thing in different times and places" than a singlet's emotional states would.

And while DID does involve emotional distress, it's also worth noting that studies have shown a majority of voice hearers with DID report that they would miss their voices if they weren't there. Significant distress/impairment are criteria because they need to be present to some extent at the time of diagnosis. But that's not all the disorder is. It's much more complicated than that.

And I need to say this, because even though I don't have the disorder, I do see DID systems fakeclaimed all the time by people who decide that having a disorder means there can never be any positives and anyone who experiences happiness with DID must be lying. Which is just completely false.

Oh... thank you... I kind of had this whole draft written before this came in and don't want to let it go to waste. But I appreciate the apology and wish you the best. 💖

#syscourse #pro endo #pro endogenic #plural #plurality #multiplicity #systems #system #plural system #endogenic system #endogenic #actually plural #actually a system

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muneca-lemon-steppa · 4 months

Note

What are your biggest reflections, lessons learned, and gratitudes for 2023? What are your intentions, goals, and dreams for 2024? Pass this on to 3 blogs you follow!

Hi Chelly my darling!!!! Thank you for this ask!!! Can you believe it’s 2024????? I’m still messing up the dates in my journal lmao.

This is honestly probably going to be a really big response, just because so many things happened this year! As a warning, this does include some talk about DV and religious trauma but there is a happy ending.

Sending all my love to you my angel 💕💕💕

Reflections and Gratitudes

In 2023 a lot of things happened. I had gotten engaged, I graduated from a law school (that brought troubles and triumphs), I studied for the bar exam, took the bar exam, had to break up and go no contact with my fiancé, I found out I failed the bar exam by 6 points, and then I lost a job offer.

I pictured my life completely different. I thought I was going to be a wife. I thought I was going to be a lawyer who lived in their own place. But that isn't what happened. I was so angry at God and I was angry at myself for 'letting' this happen to me.

But I soon realized: The breakup and failing the bar exam is probably the best thing that could have happened to me.

Since I was a kid I had planned out my entire life. My life was supposed to go a particular way because if it didn't go that way that means that no one would love me.

I had convinced myself that there was no way that someone could love me unless I achieved certain things.

It got worse once I went to law school. I don't want to get super into it, because I probably will write about it one day, but it's simple to say that the law profession favors white men and makes it explicitly known.

In my law school, it was heavily propagated that the women who were successful and loved and worthy were the ones who were married, and loved by men. I put heterosexual marriage on a pedestal, thinking that the only way that this gaping hole in my heart would be filled would be by being loved and married to a man. Because I am a woman. I am a religious woman. That's what we're supposed to do right?

And I was so angry at God because I thought I did everything I was supposed to do. I did everything everyone told me to do. I did my best to keep my mouth shut. I spoke well. I studied hard. I let things slide and was gentle. I did everything everyone else told me to do and I changed myself and stifled myself even though it nearly killed me. It still wasn't enough for him. It didn't stop him from wanting to hurt me. Why am I not enough to be loved.

I was so angry... I was angry that I wasnt getting married and that I didn't have this job that brought status. But if I got married and passed that exam, I know I wouldn't have survived. I am alive because those two failures.

Those two 'failures' brought this type of freedom that I have never experienced ever. I feel like a child again. I feel true joy.

I am rediscovering who I am. Who Mo TRULY is. What she likes. What she thinks and wants to say. What she wants to be.

I am revisiting hobbies that I had let slip to the wayside. Because I had put all my energy into trying to be enough for someone who needed something I couldn’t provide. Because all my time was spent agonizing and freaking out about whether or not I would be good enough for a degree I already had and a dream I’ve had since I was a child.

I’m realizing how incredible and fulfilling my female friendships and my familial relationship is. I’ve been in two serious relationships. I’ve nearly been married. Never ever, have I felt the kind of deep and pure love in those romantic relationships that I feel from my friends and family. The love I get from my community is worth so much more to me. I feel it and accept it so much more now.

I’ve gone through so much healing. It has changed me in so many ways. I feel like I am truly connecting with people. I can smile and have joy. People I’ve known since I was in highschool are saying, “You’ve never looked better. I’ve never seen you smile like this.”

I’m taking the bar again in February. I’m nervous of course, but I’m not scared. I’m not terrified that the Earth will explode if I don’t pass. I’m not scared that my family won’t love me. I’m not doing this to gain love. I’m doing this because I want to.

Regarding romantic relationships and the future… I have no idea. Right now I’m still processing what happened to me. I forgive my ex. I won’t call him an abuser, because in our situation I don’t think he was. He wasn’t a narcissist and we did love each other. But he was going through so many things, and I couldn’t help him anymore. He needed more than I could give and wanted a life I could not have or support. We do not talk. We won’t talk. But I do wish him every happiness. I hope that things get figured out and that he lives a good life. I don’t know if I will ever get in a serious romantic relationship again. Right now I don’t see it ever happening again. But who knows. I’m 25. I have my whole life ahead of me. I feel young. And if it doesn’t happen. It’s ok. It’s more than ok. Because I have more love around me and inside than I even know what to do with.

Lessons Learned

There is no need to be perfect. I am loved by my family and my friends UNCONDITIONALLY. I don’t have to be something that I am not. I can just be me. I can just be who I am and still be worthy of love.

I am deserving of respect and a love that is gentle and kind and truthful.

When people show you who they are, believe them.

Not everyone will like you. That is OK.

I deserve to be healthy and I deserve to take time to take care of myself.

#talking with friends #asks #getting personal #growth

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buttertrait · 6 months

Note

Hiii i was wondering if you could give me a few tips on starting a small sim blog/simblr? I’d really appreciate it ❤️

(つ≧▽≦)つ

hello! i’m probably not the best person to ask for advice however i will give it my best shot (when i first started posting on simblr i literally would just post random cas pics thinking literally no one would see them)

Defo be try to be active in the community by interacting with other simblrs! if i see someone in my notes a lot i will typically go and check out their blog, and also i tend to think of simblr as a community so it’s nice to just really experience that and be a part of that ! (side note: being active in the community does NOT mean you have to post, you can be active just by liking people’s posts or reblogging them. i will get to that in a bit)

One thing which i see a lot of new simblrs do is an intro post, which i think is also a really good way to start out your blog especially if you’re just starting out because it lets people know a little bit about you, and i also think it’s a really nice way for other people to welcome you into the community <3

My biggest no1 tip that i tell everyone, even if you’ve had a sims blog for a while, is post for yourself not for other people. what i mean by that is you should post what you want to, and even though it’s disheartening if it doesn’t get any notes, as long as you enjoy what you’re posting other people’s opinions shouldn’t matter at the end of the day this is YOUR blog. don’t post something just because you think other people want you! honestly it makes me so happy when i see people just posting stuff that brings them joy like random screenshots of their legacy sims, cas pictures ect, and honestly i think that’s what’s fun about posting your sims on tumblr is just sharing things that you find fun in your game! so trust me eventually people will find you and love your content <33

most of all, just have fun!! don’t put pressure on yourself to feel like you have to post. just post when you want to, and don’t worry about what your followers will think because again, it’s YOUR blog you should post when you want to! sometimes your life gets super hectic and you can’t post, and that’s okay you shouldn’t stress yourself out over it, like i said simblr is supposed to be fun!

#i hope this helps #like i said i’m defo not the best person to ask haha #max asks

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