#I really want dutch to return | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

astonmartinii · 3 months

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undercover verstappen | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem verstappen!reader

get you a girlfriend who will threaten mutiny to get you a seat at a competent team

based on this request: HI BABES I HOPE YOU ARE WELL! I LOVE YOUR WRITING SM! So basically I have an idea for a (possible?) Smau series, so basically it's Charles leclerc × verstappen!reader, she is a reserve driver for redbull but is also maxs race engineer (idk if you call it that? The person that talks to them that one) so she's very involved with the team and f1 in general. The public doesn't know that her and Charles are dating, and they don't even think it as Charles and max "hate" eachother (they are both doing this to protect readers and Charles relationship, they are actually besties) and basically, reader has enough if ferraris tractor, so she's like 'I will get you too redbull' and then checo retires at the end of the 2023 season, and instead of taking the job when she was offered it, she asks if Charles could have it (obviously not publicised) and Christian is like "Yes very good idea" so he asks Charles who is uncertain at first but is then OK with the idea (he is worried about becoming a second driver to max but there is lots of reassuring that he won't be nd so he accepts) and then he goes on to win 2024 wdc (and wcc but irrelevant) and he's sad that he couldn't do it with ferrari omg that's long sorry babes - @lillians-world-is-f1

MASTERLIST | TIPS | F1 SMALL BUSINESS

redbullracing

liked by maxverstappen, yourusername and 1,390,887 others

tagged: schecoperez

redbullracing: checo has informed the team that he will be retiring from the sport at the end of the 2023 season. we thank checo for his service and all the good times, he will forever be a legend of this sport. VAMOS CHECO 👏

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user1: EXCUSE ME?

user2: they really thought they could drop this on a monday and we'd all be chill

maxverstappen1: i've heard tequila tastes even better when you're retired, congrats mate - we'll miss you

user3: wait does this mean it'll be double verstappen on the grid now?

user4: there's more than one of them?

user5: max's sister is the girl you'll hear on his radio and she's technically the reserve driver as well. so she might step up to the second seat now checo has retired

user6: idk about you but that spells trouble to me

yourusername: congrats checo! will miss you, carola and all the little ones x

schecoperez: you won't be able to get rid of them that easily, i'll be cashing in on some well earned babysitting hours

yourusername: can't wait !!!

user7: what i'm hearing is that there's a chance for a daniel return to red bull?

user8: double verstappen or maxiel i don't want to choose they're both my children

user9: i'm making an outside shout for a charles leclerc red bull era

user10: i am seeing the lestappen vision

user11: my personal headcanon is that both verstappens and charles are all besties and have always been besties

christianhorner: thank you for your service checo, first drink on me 👍

user12: i know christian is sweating having to make a choice between child no 2 y/n and child no 3 daniel

user13: idk i think daniel might have the edge

user14: if geri or max have anything to do with it we might have a team so dutch that the car will be orange next season

user15: christian punching the walls cause lando extended his mclaren contract literally last week 😭

EXCERPT OF RECORDING OF THE RED BULL GARAGE, ABU DHABI

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 892,309 others

tagged: maxverstappen1

yourusername: verstappens take the city

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user18: i just know they are simultaneously the best people to party with but also the people you probably don’t want at a house party

yourusername: i’ll have you know i once plunged a toilet at a house party and disposed of a “sick sandwich” i am a DELIGHT

user19: and max?

yourusername: no comment

maxverstappen1: as if ! i don’t care if we’re blood im suing you for slander

yourusername: i watched you volley a vase at AD21

maxverstappen1: i paid for it !!! and you said it was a sick shot anyway FAKE

yourusername: you can say that cause personally i was not at fault of any of my actions that night x

user20: PLEASE MA'AM AT LEAST ONE SEASON OF DOUBLE TROUBLE PLEASE

user21: idk if i could deal with seeing jos verstappen every weekend tho...

user22: obsessed with how neither verstappen follow charles but here he be in her notifications again

user23: someone add it to the interaction spreadsheet i am CONVINCED it will one day lead to more

landonorris: lando norris erasure once again

user24: DID YOU WRITE THAT NOTE???

landonorris: hell no i'd rather peel my skin off than call the three raccoons disguised as a woman pretty

yourusername: good gosh we would've got the point without all of that

maxverstappen1: yeah lando only i'm allowed to call y/n the raccoons in a trench coat. know your place.

user25: so you do wanna tell us who wrote the note then?

yourusername: nope ;p

user26: only y/n and max have been spotted out so maybe it's just brotherly love

user27: LOL? MAX? BROTHERLY LOVE?

danielricciardo: invite seemed to get lost in the mail again

yourusername: either get a room or get out of my comment section

maxverstappen1: ???

user28: no maxiel red bull again. i don't think y/n's blood pressure can take it

liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 2,544,924 others

tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1

f1: ready to see them as teammates? charles leclerc has signed a deal with red bull to keep him at the team until 2028.

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user29: excuse me *clears throat* WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

redbullracing: welcome charles!!! no inchidents please

charles_leclerc: will we ever hear the end of that joke?

redbullracing: we know what the girlies want charles

maxverstappen1: you get used to it after a while. no ice bath thirst traps here though

charles_leclerc: phew 😥

user30: this little hoe pretending he didn't love it

user31: wait ??? does this mean what i think it could mean? GIRLFRIEND?

user32: i can't take leaving ferrari and a girlfriend in one day sorry

yourusername: welcome to the team charles :)

user33: don't think we forgot about the recording babe... IS THIS WHO YOU RECOMMENED?

danielricciardo: it better not be because if you recommended your lil boyfriend over sexy ol' me i'm gonna be real mad 😭

this comment was deleted

user34: WE SAW THAT WHAT THE FUCK

maxverstappen1: daniel you are so fucking dumb

yourusername: MAX? IGNORE IT?

maxverstappen1: bro it's all over twitter you might as well take the moment to curse out daniel before christian confiscates our phones

yourusername: DANIEL JOSEPH RICCIARDO YOU RAT BASTARD I'M GONNA RIP WHATEVER REMAINING HAIR YOU HAVE LEFT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR SURPRISINGLY PERKY ASS. IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT YOU AND YOUR CHILD BEARING HIPS WILL NEVER GET CLOSE TO A RED BULL EVER AGAIN FOR EXPOSING A SECRET US THREE HAVE KEPT FOR SEVEN FUCKING YEARS

charles_leclerc: what she said

maxverstappen1: oop.

user35: well. can we keep going this is quite fun.

christianhorner: they're all in time out sorry

user36: okay well now that happened... when can we get "who knows me better my boyfriend or my brother" lestappen version 🤨

charles_leclerc: i would wipe the floor with him

maxverstappen1: of course you would you BIG FAT NERD

charles_leclerc: i thought christian took your phone?

maxverstappen1: as if he doesn't fall for the verstappen puppy dog eyes every time

charles_leclerc: you'll use them for me right babe, RIGHT BABE?

yourusername: idk charlie, this is family business

christianhorner: i've taken their phones again

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,304,555 others

tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1

yourusername: my favourite men in the world doing what they do best

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user37: take me out back and shoot me already

christianhorner: interesting i don't see myself here and considering i pay your wages...

yourusername: dads go in different categories?

christianhorner: don't use my paternal instincts against me y/n

yourusername: say goodbye to your father's day card

christianhorner: NO I'M SORRY

user38: the way this proves that second red bull really was y/n's ...

user39: for real imagine loving a MAN so much you give it to HIM 🤮

user40: she also said in that recording at jos made it so bad for the two of them when they did compete that she no longer wanted to give the fans and the media the chance to do it either

charles_leclerc: oh wow that's crazy, you're my favourite woman ever

yourusername: don't be so rude to mama pascale

charles_leclerc: well other than mama obvioysly

yourusername: so i'm not your favourite, i see how it is

charles_leclerc: I AM SO CONFUSED SO I'M JUST GONNA SAY I LOVE YOU

yourusername: awww charlie i love you too

user41: okay i've known about them approximately two weeks and i love them your honour

maxverstappen1: i'm so much better than him y/n be real

yourusername: don't be such a sore loser maxy

maxverstappen1: don't get it twisted, i still won on track

charles_leclerc: not for long

yourusername: okay girlies leave the trash talk for the weekends this is being normal for the sake of y/n's mental health time

user42: good lord this trio is so dear to me

maxverstappen1

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 1,043,788 others

tagged: yourusername & charles_leclerc

maxverstappen1: best thing about winning is choosing the restaurant after - closely followed about the worst thing: third wheeling them.

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user43: max coming through with the y/n and charles content as he should

user44: i need him to open the vault cause i have not forgotten that y/n said this relationship is seven years old

yourusername: i think i had a wet dream about this sushi spread last night

maxverstappen1: as long as that's it, good.

yourusername: i don't need to have wet dreams anymore, the real thing is so much better

maxverstappen1: BLOCKED.

user45: i know y/n is elated to be able to publicly terrorise max with her relationship

user46: so does this mean that this is a system they've had for a while?

yourusername: room service is our middle names

charles_leclerc: maximilian can you please send the last pic to the shared album

maxverstappen1: on it 🫡

user47: SHARED ALBUM? I MIGHT DIE

yourusername: you two are such cutie patooties

maxverstappen1: but for real no being so cute on my jet again or just wait for me to go for my nap

charles_leclerc: heard and understood

yourusername: or maybe just get a life and stop being so lonely

danielricciardo: can i join for sushi or am i still banned?

maxverstappen1: eh, you could take y/n in a scrap

danielricciardo: she read my ass for filth on main i'm scared of her

charles_leclerc: she had you gagged

danielricciardo: and this litlle guard puppy agrees with whatever she says :(

yourusername: as he should !

maxverstappen1: don't try and fight it daniel, i've been in this losing battle for seven years

charles_leclerc

liked by georgerussell63, yourusername and 1,834,903 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: life in blue could never be blue with you. i love you baby, thank you for giving me this opportunity, every trophy is for you x

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user48: GOD PLEASE SAVE ME PLEASE GOD SAVE ME FROM THIS SINGLE LIFE.

yourusername: i love you too charlie, i'd do everything and more for you. i'm happy you're happy x

charles_leclerc: you can't get rid of me at this point

yourusername: seven years strong, i'm stuck to you like glue

charles_leclerc: you'll have my last name (or i can take yours) next

maxverstappen1: you can give her a ring but you'll NEVER TAKE THE VERSTAPPEN NAME AWAY

yourusername: you good?

maxverstappen1: yeah but we must always be double trouble. not even THAT man will come between that

user49: this is the trio of my dreams i need a whole drive to survive ep or even spin off just following these losers around

danielricciardo: see how could you be angry that i would want to talk about all this cuteness ?

yourusername: we are cute, correct.

charles_leclerc: i'd use the words incredibly sexy but okay

danielricciardo: are you guys still angry? I'M TRYING TO COMPLIMENT YOU

yourusername: we forgive you daniel.

charles_leclerc: i was also kissing her on my first podium REGARDLESS

yourusername: you're so romantic 🥰

maxverstappen1: GAG.

user50: convinced that max will still be the biggest big brother asshole until he is in the retirement home

alexalbon: flexing the alex albon and lily mun he photography i see

yourusername: thank you for your service

lilymunhe: we can also keep a secret 🤫

danielricciardo: I SAID I WAS SORRY

charles_leclerc: we're gonna hold it over you forever buddy

danielricciardo: was taking the red bull seat not enough?

charles_leclerc: until i win a championship? yes.

fin.

note: I'M BACK!! hope this was what you were looking for xx also, if you guys ever want to support me in any way i have a tip jar on kofi and also my small business @badlydrawnf1cats that has a sticker sheet available right now - love you all xx

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 instagram au #f1 x you #f1 #f1 social media au #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc social media au

2K notes · View notes

messrmoonyy · 22 days

Text

- The Forbidden Fruit

Arthur Morgan x Fem!Reader

Request- I NEED ARTHUR TO STEAL DUTCHS GIRL AND SHOW HER A REAL MANS LOVING. FILTHY PASSIONATE LOVING. WORK YOUR MAGIC

A/N- I got incredibly carried away with this. Is basically prawn with no plot honestly. And far softer smut than I think you intended it to be but. Here we are. Enjoy.

Warnings- 18+ | implied toxic relationship ( reader is in love with Dutch van der Linde what can you expect here ), smut: affair, Arthur being desperate to please!!!, fingering, oral ( reader receiving ) , unprotected p in v and he accidentally finishes inside oops, like the tiniest amount of cockwarming ( WC-8.9k )

AO3 | Masterlist - requests are open :)

Arthur didn’t involve himself in Dutch’s relationships. He stayed polite to whatever young woman he had hanging off his arm at the time, but that was about it. He’d seen too many girls come and go- usually in floods of tears at being dismissed by the man that had seduced and charmed them into loving him. Just working his way through shiny new plaything to plaything, hiding his unending sorrow for Annabelle under the skirt of some new girl.

Unfortunately you were no different.

In your defence, he supposed, you had lasted far longer than the rest. The only real exception to that being the famed Annabelle herself. But as was almost inevitable, your time in the honeymoon phase was slowly crumbling down around you.

Arthur did wonder if it was simply because of the current stress levels in camp. They had all been on the run for longer than he cared to try and count, but after the mess in Blackwater they had reached new heights of being hunted. It had never been this bad. Nothing had ever gone this wrong. Because before everything had gone to complete shit, he’d actually seemed quite taken with you. In truth Arthur actually had begun to consider the idea that Dutch really did love you. Had finally been able to move on from the weight on his heart of his dead lover.

But no.

Arthur was observing the same pattern as always, it had just taken far longer with you. And that just seemed to make it all the more cruel.

He barely even looked at you most days now. Barely uttered a few words in return to any question you asked.

And the arguing was growing ever more fierce. It was practically everyday.

Arthur didn’t like it. Didn’t like the way Dutch treated you. Didn’t like the way Dutch was treating anyone lately. But you in particular had never been anything but nice to him, kind. Sweet. Incredibly naive but sweet. To Arthur too. Some of the girls Dutch had strung along had been vile, rude and entitled and stuck up. But you? You were a genuinely nice person it seemed. And maybe that was your greatest flaw, for someone like that did not belong with Dutch Van Der Linde.

In fact Arthur had come to like you from a distance. The times he had spoken to you you had been interesting, intelligent. Far cleverer than him and he had always liked that in a woman if he was honest.

But still you clung to Dutch. Though your patience with him of late seemed to finally be wearing thin.

Dutch had never really been one to be ashamed or afraid of airing his dirty laundry within the gang. Whether that be packing on the PDA in camp in a way that often made Arthur want to vomit up his breakfast, or the even more puke inducing sounds of the two of you making up all night long. So arguing was no exception to that either.

And today was no different.

“ you barely even look at me! I’m right here! I always have been, I’ve always been such a good girl haven’t I? I do as you say. And look at how you repay me! “ Arthur sighed as he dropped a stack of bills into the box, successfully recovering yet another of Strauss’ debts for him. You were both screaming at each other again, the tent flaps pulled down as if that would over any form of soundproofing. It was the camp's regular ambience now it seemed.

He did feel sorry for you, he really did. You’d left everything you had for Dutch. Some beautiful, intelligent, well spoken girl. Heiress to her daddy’s mining fortune up north, used to the finer things but seeking some adventure. And Dutch had offered you both. Drowned you in jewels and gifts- though unlike the ones you had once owned the ones he gave were not his to give- Shown you off like a shiny new toy on his arm. Expressly informed Miss Grimshaw that you were not to be lifting a finger, that you would not have to earn your keep with chores like the others.

You earned your keep by looking beautiful beside him, by boosting his ego with your constant devotion to him, by letting Dutch use you for his own source of pleasure and by the sounds of things- that Arthur truly had no choice but to overhear- not getting very much back in return.

“ You know I don’t think I’ve ever met a more selfish woman in my life! “ Arthur sighed and sat down on his cot, debating whether or not to make some attempt to get the sleep he had been planning the entire long journey back to Clemens Point. But his tent was but a stone's throw from Dutch’s.

“ I have needs too Dutch Van Der Linde!” Everyone else in camp didn’t seem to mind it though, most of them preparing to settle in for the night. Whether that be passing out on their bedrolls or drinking by the fire. But Arthur wasn’t sure he could put up with another moment of the damn yelling.

“ oh? You have needs? “ Dutch’s voice was condescending. Mocking “ I give you everything! You are acting like a spoiled child”

“ a child? A child!? “ Arthur stood back up again, deciding he’d fare better trying to sleep on the damn ground rather than next to the likes of you and Dutch. So he headed out towards the edge of camp, hiding himself in the woods by the water. He slumped down against a tree with a heavy sigh and wished he’d thought to pick up a bottle of beer on the way.

But it was no matter. He was far enough away that he couldn’t hear the fighting anymore, but close enough that if he was needed anyone calling his name would be heard.

He looked out across the water, enjoying his rare moment of peace. It was a clear night and a full moon, the reflection bouncing off the water in the most beautiful way. He pulled out his journal and started to sketch it, wishing he could capture its beauty better.

‘ Dutch and the girl were arguing again. Got out of earshot for a bit to try catch some sleep. Thought the water and the moon looked mighty pretty ‘

He scrawled underneath when he was done, tucking it back into the satchel discarded at his side. Javier's guitar had silenced back in camp now and he figured everyone had gone off to bed. But he was quite content there by the water, so dropped his hat over his face and settled in to try and catch a few hours himself.

He was just dozing off when he heard the sound of boots marching quickly through the undergrowth, snapping twigs as they went. And then the soft sound of someone mumbling to themselves. He silently hoped whoever it was would keep well away from him. But the boots grew nearer and came to a halt not so far away. The crackle of a match being lit and a heavy sigh.

“ thinks he can talk to me like that? Bastard. Bastard he is. I’m a lady I deserve better than. Than that “

You.

He cleared his throat lightly to inform you that he was there, but unfortunately still seemed to startle you.

“ Christ! Gave me a damn heart attack Arthur “ he placed his hat down with his satchel with a sigh and looked up at you. In the light of the moon reflecting off the water he could see your cheeks were tear stained, the glow of the end of your cigarette illuminating your face further and showing your makeup in streaks.

He couldn’t lie that it made his heart ache for you. He didn’t particularly have any solid feelings for you, but he did feel sorry for you. It was hard not to feel sorry for the woman seduced by Dutch.

And you truly were a cut above the rest in his opinion. Beautiful as the early morning sun and, when you weren’t screaming at Dutch, as kind and warm as it too. But maybe that was fitting. Because much like the sun you could bask people in warmth, but burn them too. Beautiful and bright but scalding and he found he couldn’t look at you for too long, no matter how many times he wanted too. Simply blinding his eyes with your flaming beauty and having to turn away.

But maybe he was just getting caught up in his metaphors.

“ shouldn’t be out this far from camp “ you simply shrugged, taking another drag of your cigarette “ ain’t no one nice lingerin’ in woods at night miss” even if no Lemoyne raiders were sneaking around the trees, there were plenty of species of wildlife that would happily do a number on you. Chew off a leg or bite you with poison fangs. You didn’t know how to take care of yourself. You couldn’t handle a gun, didn’t have a single survival instinct in you.

Dutch had quite made sure of that, he’d heard you ask once or twice. And had been denied. Charming you with some string of words about how you were far too delicate to be handling a gun. To leave it for the men.

“ you’re lingering in the woods aren’t you Mr Morgan? “ he chuckled and shrugged.

“ and I ain’t that nice. Point proven lady “

“ not like Dutch would care if someone took me anyway. He’d probably be thankful “ your voice was hoarse from the shouting and he couldn’t tell if you were going to cry again or not. You took a long drag of your cigarette before seeming to suddenly remember something, dipping your hand into the waistband of your skirt and pulling out a pack “ sorry my manners. Want one? “ he took one with a nod of thanks “ can I sit? “

You sat down carefully beside him then with a long sigh, tucking your legs beneath you, and leant forward so he could light the cigarette between his lips with the end of yours.

“ thanks “ you both sat quietly for a short while. Smoking and watching the ripples in the water. He didn’t mind it actually, as much as he had been slightly annoyed at you disturbing his attempt to sleep. You were decent company.

You rarely strayed from Dutch’s side, but on the odd occasion you had and Arthur had stumbled upon you having a moment to yourself at the edge of camp it had been quite nice. So he didn’t mind sitting there with you, company. For you both.

“ I think you’re nice. By the way “ you said to break the silence, refrenching his previous comment of bad men lingering in the woods.

“ No offense to you Miss, but you’re in love with old Dutch. I don’t think you’re particularly qualified to be sayin’ whether folk is nice or not “ he said it teasingly in some hopes of making you smile. And it did. A little.

“ maybe not “ he watched you bring your cigarette to your lips again, glancing at your hands. Nails perfectly trimmed and not a single speck of dirt or sign of a scar. Hands that had never had to lift a finger. Ever. It was an interesting contrast to his own. Calloused and scarred and bruised “ but Dutch he… he…Can I ask you something? “

“ Sure “ he said and flicked his cigarette away.

“ Do you think I’m beautiful Arthur? “ you asked meekly. Your face was sad. Lingering innocence yet to be wiped away by life somehow, the kind that only remained because you had lived a life so sheltered. Even with Dutch you were as sheltered as could be “ and don’t lie. Please “

“ I think you’re beautiful, sure “ you turned back to the water again, tossing your own cigarette before promptly lighting another.

“ Dutch doesn’t. Not anymore. Barely even looks at me “ Arthur ran a hand over his face, not entirely sure what he was supposed to say to you in the situation. At all “ I know I know I don’t expect you to agree. You two you’re…you’re like two peas in a pod aren’t you? “ you said with a small laugh, but it held no humour. You took a long drag of your cigarette.

“ me and Dutch it’s… we go back a long way. But… I will agree the way he’s been treatin’ you. Ain't nice. Not when you done nothin’ but be loyal to him for so long “ you turned back to him again and gave a small smile. It was like a wave of relief had washed right over you.

Someone was finally listening.

“ I think he’s got his eyes on Mary-Beth “ you mumbled, red stained lips wrapping around your cigarette again. Much like how he had found himself admiring your hands he now found himself admiring your lips. Soft and plump and stained red in the way they often were.

He blamed it on his fatigue.

“ he’d be a fool to give you up. You’re kind, loyal, hell you might jus’ be the most beautiful woman I know. He’s in a weird place right now. He’ll snap outta it, be back to readin’ you Evelyn Miller in no time. You’ll see “ maybe the last part wasn’t entirely true. But the first part was. And you seemed to bask in his compliments. He wondered when the last time Dutch had said something nice to you had actually been.

“ Thank you “ you looked as though you might cry again. And he really hoped you wouldn’t. He didn’t like to see you cry. And he really wouldn’t know what to say to you then. Once again you turned your attention back to the water and gave a small sigh “ maybe I chose the wrong outlaw “ you said with a small laugh “ always have thought you were quite handsome “

He nearly choked on his own saliva, clearing his throat in hopes to pass it out smoothly. He didn’t know if it had worked.

“ Really? “

“ Hmm “ you mused, tilting your head inquisitively to the side “ but you were oh so hung up on that Mary girl when I found Dutch”

“ Yeah well. Mary she’s- that’s all done with now “ maybe Mary was the reason he seemed to sympathise with you so. Because he too had had a broken heart. Though he was sure his was not as brutal as yours.

“ Guess we both have bad taste don’t we Mr Morgan “ he chuckled and nodded.

“ That we do miss. That we do “ he placed a gentle hand to your shoulder and squeezed in some form of comfort “ don’t worry bout Dutch though. Really. He’ll come to his senses and if…if he don’t then. Any man would be lucky to have ya “ you sniffled and he figured you’d started crying again “ I didn’t mean to upset- “

“ No. No I’m fine. It’s just…you mean it all don’t you? All these kind words? “ he shrugged and then nodded.

“ Sure I do. You’re a beautiful woman. Inside an out “ something seemed to flash across your face, a million and one things whirring away behind your eyes. He’d never been that good at reading people, never one for knowing what people were thinking. And the look on your face was the most confusing he’d ever seen.

The next part happened far too quickly for him to process it. Maybe because he was tired, maybe because he truly hadn’t even slightly suspected you to do it. You flicked away the butt of your cigarette and leaned forward, one hand to his leg and the other to his neck. And kissed him.

He was taken aback and you pulled away before he could make any attempt to figure out what you’d just done.

“ Sorry “ you sighed in slight annoyance, seemingly at yourself, sitting back beside him again. Like it was no big deal. Just something that had happened and had no real consequence “ shit- sorry “ Arthur scratched the back of his neck awkwardly and shrugged with a small laugh. Attempting to play it as cool as you clearly were.

Maybe he’d finally cracked and entered some weird fatigue induced psychosis, hallucinations and hearing voices. And kissing Dutch’s woman.

“ S’okay. No harm done “ he was bewildered. Trying to process the last 30 seconds and coming up completely blank.

“ Just the way you talk about me I- Lord forgive me “ he was certain he must have looked half dense. Still completely confused at what on earth was happening with you. And maybe, just maybe, a tiny bit flustered at having a woman like you kiss him. Even if you were begging the Lord for forgiveness right after it “ no one’s spoken to me like that in a long time and…and I wish they had. I want to be told I’m beautiful again. I want to be kissed. I want I want…I want a lot of things “

Maybe Arthur was a stupid, idiotic fool. Maybe too many gunshot wounds and bumps to the head had finally caught up to him. Maybe he too wanted to act on his ever growing annoyance with how Dutch was behaving. But he found himself reaching out, fingers tucking under your chin to turn your face to look at him. Your eyes were so beautiful up close. Practically sparkling in the moonlight.

Oh he was such a fool.

“ could’a jus’ asked “ a small smile tugged at your lips and you laughed a little.

“ Yeah. Of course. Because you’d have said yes Arthur? “ he shrugged. He didn’t know if he would’ve actually. But now the thought was in his head “ alright “ you whispered and shuffled a little closer to him “ indulge me “

His thumb was absentmindedly brushing over your jaw, looking at you in the light of the moon and wondering how on earth Dutch wasn’t constantly begging for your attention. If he had a woman like you constantly hanging off his every word he wouldn’t know how to act. Would be like a mangy dog trailing around after you for food.

“ I might’ve “ you gave a roll of your eyes but you were smiling still, a beautiful, tempting smile.

You were a temptress. A siren. Luring him in with your beauty to do something terrible. And you were vulnerable. Sad and seeking appreciation. And he was truly debating it.

“ Well…“ you started quietly, looking up at him through your long lashes in a way that made his chest go tight “ there is… still time for you to say yes “

“ we ain’t gonna tell no one bout this y’hear? This it’s… it’s jus’ between me and you. Okay? “ your eyebrows furrowed for a second looking up at him intently, as if trying to figure out if he was joking or not. If he was serious. He wasn’t entirely sure himself, needed you to agree or disagree to put the thought to rest. His thumb continued to brush along your jaw tenderly and your eyes fell closed for a moment.

How long had it been since someone had touched you with such care? That something as simple as that seemed to mean so much to you.

“ I understand “ you whispered, eyes flickering down to his lips again. He pulled you in close, barely an inch between your lips and then spoke again “ you’ll give me what I want? Don’t treat me like him “

“ Anythin’ ya want. You got it. I’ll give ya what you deserve “ you let a shuddering breath escape and gave a small nod before closing the gap between you both again.

He hadn’t kissed anyone in a while, but he sure found his footing quickly. You kissed him like he was your source of air, climbing your way into his lap and slipping your hands into his hair. You tasted of cigarette smoke and something almost sweet. Whatever it was, it was an intoxicating mix. You were like a siren singing your call in his ear, drawing him in and taking him for your own. The weight of you in his lap was almost familiar, welcoming. Just… nice.

He had almost forgotten just how fun it was to kiss a woman. How so many men seemed to shun it as boring, pointless- Dutch obviously included. But Arthur had always loved it. Had spent many a night as a youngster sneaking his way into Mary’s room just to kiss her. To spend hours kissing and talking and kissing some more.

Kissing you was something else. Addictive. Intoxicating.

Eventually he had to pull away, his lungs screaming at him for air. Your hands slipped out from his hair and down to grasp at the collar of his shirt, resting your forehead on his.

“ Anything I want you say? “ you asked quietly, breathless.

“ Anythin’ “ you smiled and lifted your head, a quiet determination settling over you. Your lipstick had smeared and he wondered how much of it was now on his own face.

“ okay… undress me then “ you softly commanded, shifting slightly in his lap “ please. Dutch never- he makes me do it myself, barely even looks I- Please “

He almost laughed to himself about now he immediately thought getting you naked was entirely too risky. As if the entire situation alone wasn’t risky anyway. But he didn’t want to think too hard about that, instead simply channelled his recent annoyance towards Dutch into his actions. Tried to tell himself he was doing a good thing, taking care of you.

You watched his face carefully as he gently untucked your shirt from where it was tucked into your skirt, some silky soft thing that probably cost more than everything he owned in his clothing trunk put together. He undid every pearl button slowly, eyes darting up to your face as he did. Your chest was heaving in long, heavy breaths. You were nervous. Or excited. He couldn’t tell which.

You shivered lightly when he pushed it from your shoulders, now only the soft cotton of your chemise between his hands and your chest. Your nipples had hardened, from the slight night chill or lust he couldn’t say. But he found himself unable to resist the sight, leaning forward and capturing one between his lips through the cotton. You gasped softly, a sound so beautiful it made him groan. You sounded delicate. Innocent. You’d never made such sounds when he’d overheard you with Dutch. In fact a majority of the time you almost sounded in pain.

But this sound wasn’t that. This sound was beautiful. And he wanted to hear more. One hand pushed at your back to bring you closer, the other palmed at your neglected breast in hopes you’d make the sound again. And you did. Gentle, soft gasps as his tongue dampened the material of your chemise, teeth tugging at you gently through the material. Your hand found his hair again, raking your fingers through it and arching your back into his touch.

He couldn’t imagine why Dutch had never wanted to do such a thing. How could he not want to hear you make those pretty pretty sounds? How could he not want to feel you writhing in his lap and yearning to be touched. Maybe Dutch was more of a fool than he had originally thought.

“ Need you to touch me- properly I- take this off “ your sentence was choppy, like you weren’t focussed enough to truly articulate the words you wanted to say. But he understood, pulling your chemise over your head and dropping it to land with your shirt.

He took a moment just to look at you, not even entirely because he knew you’d want him to. Just because he wanted to. He’d be a liar if he said he hadn’t wondered what was hiding under your expensive clothes once or twice. How could he not when he had to try sleep through the sounds of you and Dutch of a night.

“ God damn “ he said softly, hands soothing over your waist as you basked in his admiring stare, taking in the feeling of finally being looked at. Properly.

“ like what you see Mr Morgan “ you asked, voice sultry and low in a way that made his cock twitch in his pants.

“ Dutch is a damn fool “ is all he could say, leaning forward to kiss you again, his hands moving to grab at your chest. You moaned into the kiss as he squeezed and massaged your breasts with his large hands, seizing the opportunity to dip his tongue into the warmth of your mouth. Your fingers in his hair, twisting strands around your fingers and tugging lightly. He felt like he was on cloud nine. Certain he’d somehow taken a stumble through the veil and ended up at heaven's gates.

He wasn’t a particularly religious man, but the way he was prepared to worship and praise you could truly be considered blasphemous.

He couldn’t resist the temptation of getting his mouth on you again much longer, dragging his lips from yours and wrapping them around a pebbled nipple instead. You rolled your hips against him, those beautiful soft moans still falling past your lips. This was what you had wanted from him. To be worshipped. To be looked at as the beautiful temptress of a woman you were. And not merely glanced at and then used like some two dollar whore in a saloon.

He wanted to nip at your skin, bite and soothe it with his tongue. But he knew he couldn’t. Couldn’t risk Dutch seeing it if he felt the need to stop ignoring you for a short while for his own needs. But oh how he wanted to. To mark up your smooth skin with reminders that you were desired. That you could look at as they faded and be reminded that you were wanted.

“ I need more “ you whispered “ Arthur please. Give me more “ another roll of your hips followed by a small whimper told him enough.

“ I know I got ya “ he murmured against your skin, pressing kisses up your sternum and your neck. Nose brushing at the underside of your jaw and working his way back to your lips again “ stand up. Lemme get you out of these damn clothes “ he caught the smile on your face as you stood up, he stayed seated and ran his hands over the fabric covering your hips. Something seemed to blaze in your eyes as you looked down on him. He realised it was most probably you that was usually being leered down on, but not now.

Not with him. Not with Arthur. Arthur looked up at you like the goddess you were, looked up at you with what he knew was a silent pleading in his eyes. Dutch would never ask he knew it. Dutch took. Stole. Used. Arthur didn’t. Wouldn’t.

“ I like how you look at me “ you said quietly, hand soothing over his hair “ you make me feel beautiful “

“ Cause y’are “ he murmured, hands reaching to the ties of your skirt. He wanted to see more. Wanted to see all of you.

You helped him with the slightly tedious task of getting your skirts and undergarments off, but all so slowly. Taking his time. Making sure he appreciated every single layer of clothing you removed for him, right down to unlacing your boots and holding your leg gently to help you out of them. Until you stood there as naked as the day you were born, illuminated by the moonlight on the water.

“ well ain’t you a sight “

Your skin was so smooth. Soft. Not a single scar that he could see. The skin of a woman who had never had to lift a finger. Had never known the hardships that he had. The only true blemish on your skin was the almost completely faded bruises on your hips. Fingertips. Dutch.

He soothed his hands up your legs, pressing soft kisses to the pillowy flesh of your thighs as he went, and stopped as he reached them.

“ He can be a little rough. It’s how he likes it “ you answered before he could even ask. Arthur too had been known to have his rougher moments. But he could never hurt you. Never mark you in anyway other than that of affection and care.

“ I ain’t like that “

“ I know. That’s why I want you “ he pulled you back down into his lap, his large hands splaying over your hips as he took yet another moment just to look. To admire. To thank whatever stupid damn God may exist for placing such a heavenly body in his presence “ I feel a little like the odd one out here though “ you said with a small smile, tracing a finger down from the open top buttons of his shirt to his pants.

He’d been far too occupied with you to even really notice the fact that he was ridiculously overdressed in comparison.

“ Can’t have that now can we darlin’ “ your smile grew and you made quick work of the buttons on his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders with a gentle sigh. You ran your fingers through the hair on his chest, nails scratching lightly at his skin and peppering lipstick stained kisses as you went. Littering his collarbones, his sternum.

“ much better “ your hands kept roaming and your lips kept kissing. Hands seemingly wanting to touch him all, scratching lightly up his sides and over his waist, his stomach and his ribs. Slowly moving to slide over his shoulders and loop around his neck. You rolled your hips against him again and whined softly. He was so hard it was growing painful as he stayed restrained by his pants. But he wasn’t selfish. Not like Dutch. And he wasn’t about to seek out any form of pleasure himself until he had you seeing the stars you deserved.

“ tell me what y’want “ he murmured, peppering soft kisses across your jaw.

“ touch me “ you sighed blissfully “ please touch me “

His hand slipped down in between your bodies, brushing past the soft curls between your legs and couldn’t contain the groan of a sound that left him when he felt how warm and wet you were.

“ Christ “ he muttered as your head dropped to his shoulder with a shuddering breath “ he ever touch you like this? “ he asked lowly, already knowing the answer. Why would he? He didn’t get anything out of it.

But Arthur did. Oh Arthur did.

“ no “ you whispered “ no never…please. More “ he tested the waters, pressing lightly against your clit and revelling in the squeak of a sound that it caused you to make.

“ or like this? " You shook your head again, breathing shakily as he dragged his finger through the wetness and drew light circles around your entrance.

“ Arthur “ you moaned his name in the most delicious way as he pushed his finger inside, burying it to the knuckle

“ yeah and what about this darlin? “ he again knew the answer. Dutch didn’t care about your pleasure. Didn’t care about wasting time on something as simple as making you whimper and whine for more “ he touch you like this? “

“ no “

“ think ya can take one more for me? “ you nodded again and he withdrew his finger, gathering your slick on his other before pushing them both past the resistance of your entrance “ that’a girl “ he pumped his fingers in and out steadily, curling and probing at your velvety soft walls to test what you liked.

“ This is so… oh god. This isn’t proper at all “ you laughed slightly, melting into a soft moan. Arthur chuckled, lifting your face up so you’d look at him.

“ Ain’t proper at all? It’s damn right filthy darlin” your cheeks were aflame and you closed your eyes for a moment, grinding yourself against his hand “ look at ya. Drippin all over ma fingers like that. Ain’t proper. Not one bit “ you smiled, a cheeky, devious smile that made him lean forward and kiss you again.

You were so wet it was obscene. He couldn’t tell where the sounds of you kissing stopped and the sopping sounds of his fingers began. You continued to grind down against his palm, practically riding his fingers, his whole hand wet and sticky with you.

And he wanted to taste it. To taste you. To flood his mouth with the slick, liquid gold covering his fingers. It was an almost primal desire, like a desperation as strong as needing air. He needed to. He had to.

“ Darlin’ “ he murmured, lifting your head from where it had fallen to his neck again “ gotta let me taste you. You gotta “ the look on your face only made him want it more. Your skin flushed and eyes blown out with nothing but pure lust and desire. He’d never needed anything more. Nothing else mattered, not the painful hardness in his pants, not the realisation that you were very much Dutch’s girl. He didn’t care about any of that. He just needed to be between your thighs.

“ really? No one’s ever- oh god. Yes. Yes. Please Arthur “ he withdrew his fingers making you whimper and quickly grabbed his discarded shirt and lay it down on the ground. Then he kissed you again as he wrapped his arms around your waist, gently turning you to lay back on the shirt. It still couldn’t have been particularly comfortable. But you didn’t seem to mind, tugging at his hair and lifting your hips up against him as he hovered over you.

He took his time moving down. Leaving a long and slow trail of hot, wet, kisses on your skin. You writhed underneath him, whining softly and twisting your hands in his shirt underneath you. He took extra time with your thighs. Kissing up from the inside of your knee and stopping before he could place his mouth where he really wanted to, then repeating with the other.

“ Arthur “ you whined, still squirming around and desperate.

“ I know. I got ya. Gonna make those pretty sounds for me again yeah? "You nodded, pushing yourself up onto your elbows to watch him as his head sank lower, spreading your legs wider to give him full access to the centre of you “ that’s a good girl “ he spread you open with his fingers, in awe of the way you parted for him. Like petals on a flower, dripping with the morning dew.

But you were far more delectable. A forbidden fruit begging to be tasted.

And oh was it pretty. Even in the dark, in nothing but the light of the moon on the water, it was pretty. Begging to be tasted, touched. Admired.

The sound you made as he dragged his tongue from your weeping hole to your clit was like music to his ears. He didn’t know how he managed to not come in his pants just at the sound of it.

You still kept it quiet, but loud enough for him.

His own, deep, guttural moan escaped from his chest as he licked again. Your taste flooding his mouth in a way so so much better than he could’ve imagined.

He ate you like he was starved. Like a savage predator that hadn’t seen meat for days, like a man ready for the gallows enjoying his last meal. His arms wrapped around your thighs, keeping your legs apart for him as you bucked and squirmed against his face. It was visceral. Carnal. You made him feel like his grip on his own composure and control was weaker than ever, that he was holding on to it with nothing but his fingertips.

“ Arthur “ he dipped his tongue into the welcoming warmth of your cunt, his eyes falling closed for a moment as he felt you clench around him, desperate for more. Desperate for him. And he would give you more, would give you anything you asked of him. But not until he made you come first.

He let go of one of your legs and brought his fingers back to their previous position, wanting to feel you again. To be inside of you, as close as he could get. To make you see stars.

The flat of his tongue found your clit again, certain he could feel you pulsing against him. Desperate and full of desire for him. He felt honoured, privileged. That you were so loyal to Dutch, glued to his side. Never even batting an eye at anyone else. And yet you had broken that for him. Had sought him out because you knew he would treat you well.

Your back arched off the ground as he sunk them back into you, slipping in with a welcome ease. His thick fingers pumped into you at a steady pace, his tongue diverting all its attention to your clit. Lapping and sucking and letting you press his face harder against you as you tugged on his hair.

“ don’t stop please dont- Arthur “ he had no intentions of stopping, none at all. In fact he simply honed in on his ministrations, working harder to push you closer and closer to the edge of the orgasm he knew you had been craving for weeks.

“ Not gonna stop darlin. Ain’t stopping until you come for me. Taste so good, so good “ he murmured against you, curling his fingers and hitting a spot that made you gasp and your body shudder “ there we go, right there “

He flicked his tongue over your sensitive bundle of nerves, looking at you as best he could to gauge your reaction. You were pulling a little painfully at his hair, squirming and rolling your hips against his face. He let you do it. Let you be the one using a man for your pleasure, rather than being the one used for once.

Your sounds were sinful. Melodic. He took it all in. Basked in the noises you made for him, the delicious taste of you on his tongue, drunk on you. On your taste. Your smell.

“ Arthur- Arthur please I- “ you babbled, a slightly smug smile working its way onto his face as he watched your prim and proper facade melt away “ don’t stop “

He hummed an assurance that he wouldn’t, your hips bucking against his face as he did. You were so unbelievably wet, dripping out around his fingers and soaking the hair of his beard. He would never have thought it of you. The way you held yourself around camp, so poised and prim. The accent when you spoke that made everyone else around you sound so common. And yet there you were. On your back in the woods, chasing an orgasm being offered to you by an outlaw. Repeating his name like a mantra.

And not even that of the outlaw you were in love with.

“ Arthur- “

Only seconds later it happened. You held a hand over your mouth as your orgasm hit you, muffling your choked moans, back arching off the ground and walls clamping down on his fingers as he worked you through it. Tongue still working diligently at your clit until you pushed your hand at his head, squirming away a little.

He almost didn’t want to stop. Could’ve happily stayed there a while longer, but moved back, an obscene wet sound in the late night silence as he withdrew his fingers.

He took his fingers to his mouth, sucking the remnants of your climax onto his tongue. Unable to control himself. You watched him do it, mouth slightly agape and eyes half open with some desperate undeniable look of utter desire. He could almost see the way it made you feel, could see you unable to contain the overwhelming feeling of realising you were desired. Wanted.

“ God. You are unbelievable “ you whispered, pushing yourself up onto your elbows and grabbing at his arm. Your fingers looped around his wrist and tugged his hand towards your own mouth. He shook his head with a chuckle, slightly in awe as you took those same two fingers between your red lips.

Your tongue swirled between his digits, plush lips wrapping around them and sucking. Your eyes locked on his as you did. It made his cock ache. He wanted your lips on him, wanted your tongue swirling around his length and milking him dry. He could imagine it if he thought hard enough. The way you hummed slightly in appreciation as you sucked his fingers clean, sent vibrations straight through his bones. Rattling him to the core. But he would never ask that of you. But the thought was one he would hold onto. It made him shift slightly.

“ you ain’t so prim and proper lady “ he murmured as he withdrew his fingers, a string of saliva connecting his fingertips and your lips “ This ain’t very proper of you miss “ Arthur said with a small smile, teasing “ rollin’ around in the dirt with the likes of me “

“ Oh to hell with being proper if it means I get to feel like this “ you said with a small laugh and he kissed you again for what felt like the millionth time. He wondered if you could taste yourself on his lips, smell the heady delicious smell of you on his beard.

He would’ve been more than happy to leave it at that. No matter how badly he wanted to sheath himself inside you and stay there for eternity. His goal had been your pleasure and he had achieved it.

But as he kissed you your hands began working at the buckle of his gun belt, opening it with a skilled ease that made him pull back.

“ Darlin’ you ain’t gotta do that- “

“ shush “ you pushed at him lightly so you could sit up and went to work on the buttons on his pants next “ I want to. I- Arthur take them off “ he made far quicker work of his own clothes than he had of yours and you leant back on your elbows to watch him.

You looked like a pinup girl. Like something he’d seen drawn come to life. Your eyes seemed hungry as you looked at him, dragging down his body and lingering on his rock hard cock. He was practically throbbing with want, the tip an angry shade of pink and leaking precum slightly embarrassingly “ come here. Please. Back down here “

He did as he was asked, crawling back over your body as you eyed him greedily.

“ We really don’t…I mean, If y’don’t wanna- “ his words stuck in his throat as your fingers wrapped around the length of him with a small sigh.

“ I want you to I just…can I ask one thing? “ he couldn’t get the word yes to escape his mouth, your fingers squeezing him softly in a way that made him see flashes of white in his vision. So he simply nodded “ don’t fuck me. Dutch fucks me, make love to me “ you seemed a little embarrassed at the request. But he didn’t think it was embarrassing. In fact he had had no plans to use you as brutally as Dutch. He was almost a little offended you thought he might.

“ Told you, anythin’ you want. You got it “ you smiled softly and pressed another kiss to his lips before laying back down again. He positioned himself over you, caging your head in between his arms. And it truly was incredibly intimate. He wondered when the last time you had had such intimacy was. If you’d ever received such a thing from Dutch.

He spat on his hand and grabbed a hold of his sensitive cock, stroking himself a couple of times to get himself slick. Not that he really needed to, you were already wetter than he’d ever known a woman to be. But the last thing he wanted was your discomfort. He lined himself up with you, eyes trained on your face as he dragged his weeping tip between your folds. You gasped as he caught your clit, still sensitive and alert from your first orgasm.

“ Arthur please “ you whimpered rolling your hips up against him, so desperate to have him inside of you.

“ So God damn wet for me “ he murmured “ such a good girl ain’t ya? “ you whined in answer, fingers wrapping around what you could of his bicep and digging your perfectly trimmed nails into his skin “ gonna make you feel so good I promise darlin’ jus’ like you deserve yeah? “ you whispered out a yes and brought your other hand to the back of his neck. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from you, still running his cock along the length of your slit. Teasing.

“ Keep looking at me. Please look at me Arthur “ he continued to do as asked. Again. Though his eyes had barely strayed from your face anyway “ I need you so badly “ Eyes locked on yours, he finally pushed into you, he took it slow. Letting you take it inch by inch, watching the look of ecstasy wash over your face. Your eyes fell closed.

He fought to retain his own composure, overwhelmed by the tight, wet, warmth of your walls enveloping him. He could feel every unique ridge and bump that made your cunt oh so perfect, feel every muscle stretch and contract as you adjusted to him.

“ god- oh god “

“ shh shh easy there. I got ya “ he paused once he was seated inside of you, grabbing at your hip with one hand to angle your hips better. Allowing you to comfortably take all of him in. He waited, let you adjust to his size, not daring to move before he got the go ahead from you “ there you go, look at you, takin’ all of me like that. So good f’me “ you basked in his praise, a dopey kind of smile spreading across your face.

“ so much bigger than him “ you whispered with a small laugh and Arthur couldn’t help the smug smile on his face. Kissing you and touching you and making you come on his tongue had been one thing. But having you like this? Having his cock buried to the hilt inside of you, so unbelievably close together. And to then be told that? To know he was about to do you better than Dutch ever had. Ever could. It felt like the biggest fuck you to the man that had been not only mistreating him of late, but also the goddess of a woman beneath him “ I’m good. You can move. Please move “

He didn’t need telling twice. Pulling out almost completely and thrusting back in in one smooth motion. The pace he fell into was just as you’d asked. Loving. Tender. But hard and deep, making sure his hips were flush with yours with every stroke. You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulled his face back down to kiss him again.

If anyone had spotted you they’d have easily mistaken you both for a lovesick couple having a private moment to yourselves. The entire thing intimate and passionate. No one would assume it was an affair in motion, hidden away in the woods by the shoreline in fear of your lover finding the pair of you there.

But it was what you wanted. What you had needed. And he felt privileged to provide.

He pulled back from your lips to watch you again, enthralled by the way your face relaxed and twisted in the pleasure he was providing you. You continued to spill those angelic sounds from your throat, growing breathier and higher pitch as he continued to drag his cock against the sopping, sensitive heat of your cunt. He had to focus hard not to finish in seconds. So much build up paired with being practically celibate for months was truly doing him no favours, but he focussed. He wasn’t letting this end until you came once more. You deserved it.

“ Keep those pretty eyes on me “ he murmured as they fell closed again “ that’s it darlin’, look at me there ya go “ everytime he spoke the slightest word of praise you practically beamed, so desperate to hear it. To be told you were good. Beautiful. So different to Dutch constantly yelling at you about how annoying you were, how much your mere presence bothered him these days. So he kept it up.

“ Doin’ so well for me. This pussy it’s perfect, ain’t that right? C’mon tell me “ he urged, still fighting off his ever looming orgasm. The sounds alone was enough to make him want to burst. Sweat slicked skin on skin, the wet sounds of your cunt dripping around the swollen intrusion of him. And those sweet sweet moans of yours.

“ yes “ you whimpered “ it’s perfect “

“ That’s a good girl “ he increased his pace ever so slightly and your hands slipped from his arms to his back, dragging your nails down him to try to pull him impossibly closer to you.

He moved a hand down between your bodies, rubbing your clit in time with his thrusts, grunting and choking back his own moans as you squeezed him. Like your body never wanted him to leave, gripping his cock with your cunt and making it ever more harder to hold back. He couldn’t help but have a look, glancing down to see the way you stretched around him, mesmerised at the way you took him in so deep.

“ tell me I- oh. Tell me I’m beautiful “ you whimpered, sounding almost like you might cry. From pleasure, from upset. He didn’t know. But he continued to do as asked.

“ you’re beautiful “ he murmured picking up his pace a little more, his sweat slick skin slapping against yours. He was desperate to see you come again. Wanted to see your face up close this time, watch your eyes roll back and your kiss swollen lips part in ecstasy “ so beautiful darlin. Doin’ so well f’me, takin’ me so well “

“ don’t stop, don't stop “ he dropped his head to your neck whispering every word of praise he could think of into your ear, your body arching up against his and whimpering and whining with every word.

“ ain’t ever looked prettier than this “ he whispered, his own voice becoming breathless with the effort “ shit- look at ya, takin’ my cock so well. So pretty darlin’ “

Your second orgasm seemed to shock you as much as him, clawing at his skin to hold him close as your body trembled beneath him, biting at his shoulder to muffle your moans.

He didn’t mean to finish inside of you, had fully intended to pull out. But the way your cunt had squeezed him, the sounds you had made as he pushed you over the edge for the second time.

He muffled his own groan of pleasure in your neck, fingers digging into the dry earth beneath you, spilling load after load whilst fully sheathed inside of you. His entire body tensed, a pleasure he hadn’t felt in an incredibly long time. His heart was hammering in his chest, blood rushing loudly in his ears as it seemed to drag on forever.

And then he came to his senses.

“ m’sorry. Shit. Sorry “ he panted as he tried to compose himself and pushed himself up onto his hands to pull out. But you yanked him back down, arms wrapping around his back again and legs tightening around his waist.

“ no. Please. Stay. Stay right there. Just a moment would you “ he had come to realise in the past.. how long had you two even been out there? However long it was, he’d come to realise he was terrible at saying no to you. Could never possibly even dream to deny you of anything you wanted from him. And so he slumped back down onto his forearms, dropping his head against your shoulder for a moment. Your chest heaved beneath him and you caught your breath, fingers tracing gentle strokes along his spine. He felt he could stay there for hours.

“ You doin’ okay? “ he asked, pressing a light kiss to your jaw when he had composed himself a little more.

“ marvellous Mr Morgan “ you whispered with a small smile “ truly. Marvellous “ he couldn’t help but kiss you again, the long lingering kind meant for two lovers.

After a few minutes you both finally moved, re dressing in silence and then sitting back in your original position against the tree. He handed you a cigarette, lighting it and placing it between your lips.

He wondered what he looked like. Wondered what evidence you had left on him. Had he sweated off the lipstick prints on his chest or were they still there? He knew you had scratched his back up good and proper and would have that reminder there for a few days at least.

“ Thank you. Mr Morgan '' you said quietly after a few silent moments of smoking, blowing out a long stream of smoke “ I mean it I- i'm not sure what I’m supposed to say “

“ Don’t say anythin’ “ he said with a small wave of his hand, appearing as blaise as he possibly could but in reality knowing he wasn’t about to forget that night anytime soon “ its fine. Really. Anytime y’need me, for anythin’, you know where I’ll be “ you smiled and he watched your body relax a little more.

“ you know, i might just take you up on that “

He sincerely hoped you would.

#ask and ye shall receive #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 #rdr2 community #rdr2 fanfic #x you #background Dutch van der Linde x reader #fluff #dutch van der linde #Arthur Morgan smut #john marston #javier escuella #Sadie Adler #arthur morgan rdr2 #van der linde gang

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pinkcarnatixns · 1 month

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leah williamson | training wheels

synopsis your plan for a romantic date goes downhill when your girlfriend admits she doesn't know how to ride a bike [2.1K] contents pouty! leah, slight injury, slightly suggestive

You really thought that your girlfriend would be blown away by your plans for a romantic date, but you apparently had made a quite significant miscalculation.

Leah, constantly one to sweep you off your feet, had organized a sweet weekend getaway to Amsterdam for your six month anniversary. Since joining the club and hitting it off with the blonde, you hadn’t had much time to explore around Europe like you’d hoped when you first decided to make the move. With the way she hung onto your every word, Leah had clearly remembered this small detail and planned an extremely thoughtful getaway around it, surprising you with the plane tickets after training one day.

You were nearly drunk on the amount of affection you felt for the girl, having been sufficiently pampered with the amount of plans she had made for the two of you. The day before, Leah had arranged a walking tour of the city which, wanting to stay in her own little bubble with you- was guided by the overexcited girl herself. Judging by the exasperated texts you received from a certain Dutch striker afterwards, it seemed that she had really gone all out to impress you, even if it meant she was never allowed to ask Viv a question again. If you hadn’t been completely gone for her by that point, you had arrived back to your beautiful hotel room just to see a new dress and heels laid out on your bed, before you were promptly shooed off to get ready.

When you stepped out of the bathroom that had turned into your holding cell at her insistence, you were pleasantly surprised by the sight of your girlfriend in a suit you had picked out for her during one of your first ‘dates.’ She had been so nervous then, and desperate for an excuse to see you away from your teammates’ teasing remarks, using the excuse of an upcoming event to have you go shopping together. You never did get to see her in it, and when you had started dating, she claimed that it was too precious and had to be used for an incredibly important event.

Apparently, she had deemed her surprise dinner date a special enough occasion, almost missing the reservation due to your appreciation of her attire. After hours of giggling over an expensive bottle of wine and being kindly told to wrap it up by staff, both your stomach and heart were completely full. Stumbling around in the streets hand-in-hand, entirely too dressed up while looking for ice cream with her jacket hugging your shoulders, you could have died happy.

So, after finally collapsing for the night and drifting on cloud nine, you decided you wanted to return the favor somewhat- to make her swoon for once. With a free day tomorrow, and her snoring softly in your ear with your head pillowed by her arm, you sneakily turned your phone brightness down and hatched your plan.

In the morning, even though Leah took so much coaxing to get out of bed that your lips were sore, you had succeeded in getting her dressed and out the door. Not one to enjoy being out of the know, she had attempted many sneaky glances at your navigation app, receiving warning glances every time she tried to distract you from your mission. As you approached, you gave her a deceivingly sweet smile, immediately making her suspicious. “Love, you’re being quite cryptic and we’ve gotten pretty rural. Do I really treat you so badly you’ve taken me to the Dutch countryside to kill me?”

“Leah! Where’s your sense of adventure?” You pout at her with hands on your hips, determined to have your dream realized. “Now can you close your eyes please?”

“Oh, this is really the end for me now. Tell my mum I love her.” She sasses back at you, but does as you say anyhow, putting her hands over her eyes for emphasis. You mock her accent and pouty tone under your breath, but delicately guide her by the crook of her elbow, taking care that she doesn’t trip over anything.

She lets you lead her, careful to keep her eyes shut to avoid upsetting you and whatever has gotten you so excited. You firmly tell her to stay where she is and reinforce that she needs to keep her eyes shut before she hears your steps walk off. She worries you’ve gone and left her abandoned there before she makes out your voice talking to someone quietly, curious at the clanging that follows the conversation. Relieved at the warmth of your hands returning to her, you slowly take her hands away from her eyes. “I’m going to count down! Stay here- ” She hears you scurry off and at your prompt, opens her eyes, letting them adjust to the sunny day.

“Ta-da!!” Her eyes focus on you, before dragging over to what you’re gesturing excitedly to. Hand gestures highlighting two bikes- fuck. Her face goes completely red as you prattle on, “We’ll be so cute! And this path up here goes just past some pretty tulip fields, we can stop and have a picnic!”

Silently and not quite meeting your gaze, she grabs one of the bikes by the handlebars and starts walking it past the stand where you had rented them- nodding in thanks to the old man running it. This leaves you completely confused, and you jog your bike over to where she’s walked off, “Is it horribly cheesy? Do you hate it? I’m sorry I just wanted to do something for you because-”

Once out of range of the little bike stand, she whips around to face you and mumbles something under her breath, only making eye contact with her feet. You tilt your head questioningly, prompting her to try again, and she rushes out “‘m not good at riding bikes.”

As you take a second to actually process her fast words, it’s your turn to be embarrassed, “Leah! You’ve never told me you don’t know how to ride a bike? I dragged you all the way out here trying to be romantic!”

She kicks around the gravel under her Birkenstocks, like a scolded kid pouting, “It’s embarrassing…” You sigh hard and start to speak before being cut off, “-And I know how to ride one I’m just not good at it!”

You raise an eyebrow, and she immediately loses the nerve she had built up, averting her eyes again. Having been too determined to give up something you had been so excited for, you knock your kickstand and trudge over to her. “Well get on! We’re going to get your confidence up!”

She realizes that you’re not giving up anytime soon, losing the battle of puppy-dog eyes that she initiated. You expect her to climb right onto the bike, but instead she also kicks her stand and steps away. You’re ready to protest, expecting that she’s ready to call it a day, but are surprised when she falls into a crouch in front of you. She hastily starts tucking the bottoms of her baggy jeans into her socks and glares up at your shaking form, trying to contain your laugh. “What! You really do want me to die, don’t you? What happened to safety first?”

You shoot her an apologetic glance, still letting some giggles escape as you ruffle her hair. “I’m very flattered that you care so much for some cheap H&M jeans I bought you love, but I think you’re safe. Now stop stalling!”

She shoots you a wary glance, but regardless stands and kicks her leg back over the bike, getting into position. “Now! The hardest part is just getting started and righting your balance so I’ll give you a little push!”

Leaving her side to stand over the back wheel, you grab her hips to steady her as she places her foot on one of the pedals. She stiffens slightly and shoots you a wink over her shoulder at the new position, “Well miss cheeky! I bet this was your plan all along wasn’t it?”

At her teasing, you slightly lean her over to the side she isn’t resting on, crumbling her confidence and setting off her balance- her face paling immediately. “Hey! This is no way to treat someone who is greatly humoring you right now! We could’ve been having a grand old time back in our hotel room at this time!”

“Sorry sorry! Just focus!” You giggle and feel your face get a bit hot at the implications of her words before continuing. “Okay you’re gonna sit up, look up-” She follows your words, and with a hard push from you, “And pedal!”

She wobbles a bit, clearly panicking and forgetting to actually pedal, having to put her feet back down to stop herself from completely toppling over. Catching her breath, she exasperates. “This is horrible! Who does this for fun? Psychopaths?”

You try terribly hard not to laugh at her, but she’s just so cute and frustrated that you can't help yourself, shooting her a big smile at her withering glance. You really do appreciate that she’s trying for you, and lean up to give her a big, exaggerated kiss on the cheek with some words of encouragement. “You really almost had it baby! Just have to breathe and pedal, momentum helps a lot! Now come on, one more time, I’ve got you.”

She nearly hops off, and you rush to praise her so that she keeps at it, “You really are so brave lovie! I nearly had to be shipped off to the hospital when I was being taught!” She puffs up a little at the praise, and so you give her a proper kiss and continue, “My fearless, beautiful girlfriend!-”

“Alright alright, one more time but that is it! I don’t like making a fool of myself.” She backs up a little bit, ready to start again and clearly psyching herself up in her head. This time you’re stationed next to her, holding her handlebar with one hand and the seat cushion with the other. She glares down at the bike like it’s personally out to get her as you count her off, kissing her on the cheek and propelling her forward with all your strength on one.

She gets some really good speed at your push, but once again forgets she needs to do the rest, righting her error as you yell desperately, “Pedal!”

She starts really getting the hang of it with minimal swerving, and you whoop excitedly as she actually manages to turn the bike around and head back towards you, complete with a smug smirk on her face as she passes you.

However, her pride doesn’t last for long enough as her eyes are still glued to you and not on the rock in her way. Before you can warn her, she’s crashing to the ground and you rush over to her deflated form. Luckily, her football instincts had clearly kicked in and she had landed with no injuries, bar some scrapes on her face and hand. You know you’re really in for it at the familiar frown you receive as you help her up.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

The door chime indicating your exit from the small convenience store, you walk over to your poor girlfriend’s pathetic form, a cup of ice in one hand and box of plasters in the other. Sitting on the rough wood of the bench, she allows you to coo over her as you patch her up and hold ice over her thrumming wounds.

You hold her hand in silence, laying your head on her shoulder as you sit side-by-side, watching the sun set over the beautiful tulip fields. You tear up a little bit, emotional at the view and that you were the cause of your girlfriend’s wounds, your plans slightly ruined. You nearly open your mouth to apologize again when she starts, “Thank you for today. I would’ve never thought to just sit outside and enjoy the view like this. And for believing in me, even if it was slightly misplaced.” She chuckles at the last part, placing her head on yours and nuzzling in slightly.

You giggle at her sincere words, squeezing her hand in yours, reveling in the heat radiating off her accompanied by the comforting smell of her perfume. “All these flowers and you still have my favorite two lips in the world. Speaking of, I think I deserve a proper kiss after my act of courage today.”

You laugh at her horribly cheesy joke, but decide to indulge her anyway, pulling off her shoulder and cradling her poor wounded head in your hands as your lips meet.

a/n: thank u guys so much for the love on my last fic!! also terribly sorry if this doesn't make sense to my dutch friends </3 i am american

++ my reqs are open for more leah fics or for other woso girlies!

#leah williamson fluff #leah williamson x reader #leah williamson #woso one shot #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso x reader #woso community

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sebscore · 11 months

Note

Hi! I was wondering if you could do female driver and her side of the garage shenanigans. Like her and her team just being besties and entertaining. Love your work can’t wait to see what you do next!

MONTE-CARLO MADNESS

pairings: f1 grid x driver!reader

warnings: swearing. slight slander of two dutchmen (nothing too serious). mention of checo’s quali crash last year.

author's note: i was bored during the race so i wrote this :) I know it’s not exactly what you asked, but it does include more of her and marco 💜 (also, I know that gif is from 2021, but it was too beautiful not to use lol)

masterlist

• • • • • • •

''Y/N!'' A hand on her shoulder pulled her attention away from her conversation with her engineer, and to the older German man next to her. ''Norbert! Hey, how are you?''

''I'm in Monaco!'' He exclaimed, pulling the young woman in a hug.

The driver's face broke out in a smile, endeared by Norbert's excitement over being in the foreign country. ''Yeah, you are!'' She laughed, her face resting on his shoulder.

''Can I get a hug too?''

Her eyes widened as she recognised the voice, pulling away from the older man, she was met with the bright smile of Sebastian. ''Seb!''

Y/N almost jumped into her mentor's arms, delighted to see him for the first time in months. ''What are you doing here? You didn't tell me you were coming.'' She held an accusing but disbelieving tone, shocked to see him in Monte-Carlo out of all races.

''Surprise!'' He joked, holding up his arms as if it were a surprise party.

The woman slapped his arm in return. ''When did you get here?'' She asked him, still in shock about the former driver's appearance.

''Just now, my dad and Fabian got here yesterday- I came by car.'' Sebastian answered, pointing at his father who was busy catching up with the Aston Martin team.

''Of course you did,'' Y/N chuckled at the mention of his transport, ''are you staying here the entire weekend?''

The German shook his head. ''No, just today- Stefano invited me, I'll be there for the driver's briefing, though.'' He clarified, pouting at the flash of disappointment in her eyes.

''That's nice, everyone will be happy to see you.'' She was slightly let down about his one-day visit, having hoped he would at least watch qualifying on Saturday.

Sebastian nodded. ''Yeah, it will be nice to see all the drivers again.''

''You know,'' Y/N spoke up, catching his attention, ''retirement doesn't really suit you- I think you should come back.'' She smirked, a mischievous grin on her face.

The older man let out a chuckle, shaking his head. ''I put on some nice clothes for you today, I'm hurt.'' He feigned to be hurt by her words, an overdramatic pout hanging on his lips.

''It's definitely better than the usual attire, for sure.'' The driver glanced his outfit up and down, the man wearing blue pants and a white loose shirt.

Sebastian simply laughed, scratching his voice. ''So, uh, how are you feeling about the race?'' He asked her.

Y/N unsurely nodded her head, not too confident. ''The car felt good today so I think there's a good chance for pole.'' The first free practice of the GP had gone well, taking the second top spot right before Lewis.

''Well, I'm quite confident you're gonna take pole.'' Sebastian retorted, matter-of-factly.

The young woman snorted at his response. ''Thanks, I'll keep that in mind when I'm in the car.''

The German patted her shoulder. ''I hope you win,'' he confessed, a serious expression on his face, ''I like Max, but the Dutch anthem is not to my taste.'' Sebastian grinned

''You won last year. Who says you can't do it again or at least make it onto the podium?'' He didn't expect an answer out of her, he just wanted her to feel more confident in herself and especially at a circuit she had consecutively done well at.

Y/N shrugged her shoulders. ''Last year, I got lucky with Checo's crash during quali and with the Ferrari strategy. The Red Bulls are way too fast, Seb. I'll be happy with a podium.''

The young driver knew a win would be practically impossible if either one of the RBR cars made it in front of her in qualifying. The previous year, she managed to qualify P3 behind the two red cars and due to Ferrari's disaster class, she was the first to take the chequered flag.

''But you still held up the Red Bulls last year, you're being too negative.'' Sebastian argued, discontent about her certainty that she wouldn't win again.

''It's whatever, anyway- I have to discuss some things with Marco. I'll see you later?'' Y/N made the move to leave, sticking out her fist.

Sebastian bumped his fist against hers. ''Yes, Turn that frown upside down, Y/N!'' He yelled after her as she walked away, resulting in a joking middle finger from the young woman.

''What's the best time now? I have one more lap in me, if I need to.'' Y/N asked her engineer over the radio, on an out lap.

There was silence on the other side for a few seconds. ''Uh, the leaderboard is very chaotic right now, it changes every time a driver crosses the line.''

''Who is on top now?''

''De Vries.''

''Are you fucking serious?''

She knew Monaco qualifying would be absolute madness, but an Alpha Tauri on top of the leaderboard? She was not expecting that.

''Push for one more lap- we're safe, but everything is changing very fast.'' Marco encouraged her to do one more flying lap, wanting to be confident they made it into the next round of qualifying.

Y/N was the last car on the circuit starting her last lap right before the time of the quali session ran out. She had the fastest second sector and crossed the line, moving up to P2 and being safe from elimination.

''We're good, nice job!'' Marco complimented her, confirming that she made it into Q2.

''He he, that was a little scary.''

''You gotta push like a beast now, Y/N! Verstappen on pole now and no one is behind you.'' Marco's words sounded over the radio, doing his best to hype her up as this was their last chance to take the pole position.

''Copy.'' She simply answered, before starting her flying lap.

''Y/L goes faster than Verstappen in the first sector. Look at how she's pushing the car to its limits! It's absolutely unbelievable!'' Crofty's voice boomed through the speakers.

''A purple second sector as well! Is Y/L going to take her first pole position in Monaco? She's very close!'' Ted continued, his eyes glued to the big screen.

''UNBELIEVABLE STUFF! Y/N Y/L TAKES THE POLE POSITION HERE IN MONACO! SHE SURPASSES THE RED BULL OF MAX VERSTAPPEN TO SET THE FASTEST TIME! WHAT A PERFORMANCE BY THE TALENTED YOUNG WOMAN! WHAT A LAP!'' The commentators couldn't believe it as they saw her name rising to the very top of the leaderboard, not expecting her to set a better time than the Red Bull car.

''YOU DID IT! POLE POSITION, Y/N! YOU DROVE LIKE A MANIAC!'' Marco shouts over the radio, trying his best to give his congrats as their entire team jumps around him.

Her eyes widened as she took in the news. ''I'M ON POLE? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? WOOOOO!!! MONACO BABY!'' The driver loudly exclaimed, so loud that her team had to remove their headphones from their ears.

''Guys, I'm so proud of all of you! Everyone worked so hard and this is for the entire team, thank you so much!'' Y/N expressed her appreciation for her team, knowing she couldn't have done it without them.

She made it to Parc Fermé and parked behind the No. 1 standee, already seeing Charles and Max there. It took her some time to get out of the car as it was difficult to turn everything off with shaking hands.

The young woman stood on top of her car and threw her hands in the air, pointing at her team who cheered for her- along with the crowd who went crazy at the sudden turn of events.

She ran to her team, immediately hugging Marco upon spotting him at the front of the fence. ''I told you to drive like a beast, not a maniac!'' He laughed, patting her back.

''I don't remember anything from that lap, I think I blacked out.'' Y/N told him, pulling away from him and shaking the hands of the rest of the team.

Charles was the first one of the drivers to congratulate her. ''That was crazy, congrats.'' The former Prema teammates hugged each other.

''Thanks, it was absolute chaos out there,'' she sighed, taking off her helmet and balaclava, ''I know you wanted a different result, but you still did well.'' The younger one told the Ferrari driver who simply brushed it off.

''You fucker!'' A sudden slap on her arm, took her focus off Charles. ''How did you do that?''

She found the smiling face of Max, holding out his hand for a typical driver's greeting. ''Dude, I don't know! I for sure thought it was over for me.'' She told him, a shocked expression still on her face.

''Congrats, you deserve it.'' The Dutchman praised her, a genuine tone found.

Y/N nodded her head at him. ''Thanks, appreciate it.''

''It's the three of us again.'' The Red Bull driver laughed, pointing at the three of them as it was also the same trio in Baku, just a different order.

Charles sighed. ''I have to meet with the stewards after the interviews so I don't know if I'm gonna stay at P3.'' He told them, confusing the two other drivers.

''What do you mean?'' Y/N asked him.

''Lando was on a flying lap and I got in his way- in the tunnel.'' The Monégasque explained, informing them on the unfortunate moment.

Max frowned. ''That's not good, no. You didn't saw him coming?''

''The team didn't tell me.'' Charles answered, holding in the urge to roll his eyes.

''They didn't tell you that Lando was coming? That's fucked up.'' The youngest one said, puzzled on why this even happened in the first place.

The Ferrari driver shook his head. ''I'm gonna get a penalty for a mistake I didn't make.'' The defeated look on Charles' face upsetted both of his competitors, disappointed that the Monaco curse had found its way to him again.

A silence fell upon them, not knowing what to say as the three of them were all feeling very different emotions after the chaotic qualifying session.

''Well, I'm gonna grab my award.'' Y/N sheepishly smiled, breaking the uncomfortable silence between them.

The two men nodded at her as she walked away, but she turned around as a thought came into her brain. ''Oh and Charles?''

''Yes?''

''Tell them it was just an inchident.''

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#f1 fic #f1 fics #f1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #max verstappen x reader #sebastian vettel x reader #f1 x female driver #f1 x oc #f1 x you #f1 x y/n #charles leclerc x you #max verstappen x you #sebastian vettel x you

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taexual · 4 months

Text

sleepwalking ● 15 | jjk

pairing: jungkook x fem!reader

summary: due to unfortunate circumstances, you ended up managing your ex-boyfriend’s band. you thought you’ve both made peace with it, but suddenly he’s very eager to prove to you that first love never dies.

genre: rockstar!jungkook / exes to lovers

warnings: explicit language, SLOW BURN, ANGST (including some miscommunication due to alcohol & descriptions of anxiety)

words: 10.9k

read from the beginning ○ masterlist

chapter 15 ► i had the whole damn world and i gave it all away, what did i think i would save?

Waking up on a good day was not a pleasant experience for Jungkook. But waking up that morning in Tilburg felt a bit like having his brain pulled out through his nose with a metal hook.

The bus was dim—was he on the bus? How did he get here in the first place?—and the slightest light coming from the skylight made his eyes sting. His head seemed to split in two, and his whole body felt as if he had deliberately allowed a lawnmower to run over him.

So this was a hangover, then.

He hadn’t had many of those in his life, which of course, did not indicate how often he drank. Maybe he had lost his ability to drink without getting really drunk. Or maybe he drank so much that even this ability wasn’t enough.

“You awake?” a voice asked, and the kaleidoscope of sharp echoes in Jungkook’s head forced him to retreat further into his bunk.

“Why,” he uttered, each word like fire in his parched mouth, “would you yell?”

A chuckle in response helped him identify the speaker as Hoseok.

“You’re the only one still sleeping. Everyone else is getting pancakes for breakfast,” he said. “Do you want to know what ‘pancake batter’ is in Dutch? Word on the street is, pronouncing it three times in front of the mirror will kill you.”

“I will kill you,” Jungkook retorted, “unless you can bring me some water. Please?”

Amused, Hoseok walked to the back of the bus where the mini-fridge was. He grabbed a bottle and brought it to the younger member before settling on the edge of his bunk.

“Here,” he said. “Why’d you drink so much last night in any case?”

It took incredible effort for Jungkook to sit up, but he managed—while groaning and moaning, and glaring at Hoseok each time the older boy chuckled at his exaggerated struggle.

Jungkook took the water bottle and emptied half of it in one gulp, but it didn’t make much of a difference. The bitter aftertaste lingered in his mouth, and every word he spoke still felt like acid.

“I can’t remember,” he said, even though something inside of him told him that this wasn’t true. Apart from the pain, he also felt this heavy unease—as if he had an apocalyptic event scheduled for this afternoon, and he needed to prepare for it, hence the excessive drinking. “I’m sure I had a reason.”

Hoseok assumed as much and he asked, “did something happen?”

“I—” Jungkook interrupted himself when he threw his head back to finish the rest of the water. This didn’t help either, and now his stomach felt uncomfortably heavy. He said again, “I don’t know. Can’t remember.”

“I saw you leave the venue with—”

“I remember that,” he said quickly as if he was afraid to hear the conclusions Hoseok had drawn after seeing him leave with you.

“Where’d you two go?” Hoseok asked.

“To this park,” Jungkook said, squeezing his eyes shut and rubbing the bridge of his nose with two fingers as he tried to bring last night back to him. He remembered kissing you. Unless he’d dreamt that, of course. Both options were likely. Neither was acceptable to say out loud. Weakly, he continued, “uh… I don’t really—we talked there.”

Since Hoseok did not know what had really happened between you and Jungkook at that park, he followed up with the logical question, “did you have a fight?”

“No, we…” Jungkook sighed. Another memory returned, this one more vivid than the kiss he thought he remembered—which was a shame. He would have preferred the kiss. He opened his eyes and looked at Hoseok questioningly, “Namjoon called her. Yoongi’s laptop?”

“Ah, yeah.” The older boy laughed. “They went to McDonald’s and left it there. Then they got so wasted, they forgot about it.”

Jungkook snorted weakly. “Idiots.”

It gave him great pleasure to say the word, because for once, it wasn’t him who was being described here.

“Just like you, huh?” Hoseok teased nonetheless. “Seems like everyone had a reason to drink last night.”

Jungkook ignored the gentle jab and focused on remembering you.

“Did you see her this morning?” he asked.

Hoseok nodded.

“Did she seem angry?” Jungkook continued, hoping for a clue about the rest of the night. The last thing he seemed to remember was the truck stop. He was alone in his memory, but he assumed that was because you hadn’t returned from finding the missing laptop yet.

Jungkook didn’t think you had gone drinking with him last night; he seemed to remember—or just assumed—that you had left before he got drunk. And he realised that he knew why he got drunk – he was worried about the bet and how he would tell you.

He thought he remembered talking to someone about this last night, but it couldn’t have been you, because he recalled being called “son.” It must have been someone else at the bar, then. Maybe the bartender.

But what happened afterwards? Did his chest hurt so much because he still hadn’t told you?

“No. She didn’t seem angry,” Hoseok said. “But she’s never angry with me because I never give her a reason to be.”

The teasing smile on the older member’s face made Jungkook grimace. “Good for you.”

Hoseok chuckled because he didn’t get to see Jungkook like this often. Usually, the entire band was wiped out with a cursed hangover, and Jungkook was the one obnoxious ray of sunshine in the room. Hoseok and the others always thought this was unfair. Clearly, this morning was a welcome change.

“She seemed okay,” Hoseok said. Then, more seriously, he asked, “you think you did something? Besides getting drunk, I mean.”

The younger boy exhaled and watched the bedding on his bunk for a minute. It was black and seemed even darker in the shadow inside the bus. It did nothing whatsoever to jog his memory.

He was worried that he had done something very terrible. Not worse than having made the bet in the first place, but terrible nonetheless.

What if he’d missed his chance to tell you and someone else had told you first? Probably not Sid, because he may have been an absolute dickhead, but he needed to win the bet fairly to be satisfied. But what if—

Taehyung, he thought suddenly.

Taehyung knew. What if he’d found you while Jungkook was in the bar?

You tell her or I will, Taehyung had said to him back in Amsterdam.

What if he had told you everything because he couldn’t bear to keep it to himself any longer?

Jungkook had seen how distressed the bassist was. He had noticed how he kept avoiding his eyes when they were in the same room.

Groaning, Jungkook pressed his palms to his forehead and strained to remember something. Did he talk to you after you returned with the laptop? What did he say? More importantly, what did you say that left him half-paralysed with this unidentified worry?

“I… don’t really…” Jungkook tried to cling to a memory and see what happened next, but his thoughts remained muddled. Did he kiss you in the park before or after you told him about your parents’ tumultuous relationship?

“Did you drink together?” Hoseok enquired, slipping into investigator mode as he crossed his legs on Jungkook’s bunk. He thought he was being helpful, but Jungkook felt pressured into giving answers that wouldn’t reveal too much—you’d rubbed off on him, he supposed. Or maybe he just didn’t want to upset you any more than he may have already had. “Or did you get drunk after she left to find the laptop?”

“After. I think,” Jungkook said. “I was driving before.”

“Driving?” Hoseok repeated, visibly surprised.

Jungkook waved his hand dismissively. “Long story.”

Hoseok noticed that Jungkook was struggling to speak in longer sentences, as evidenced by his colourless face as he shrank away from the skylight. He decided to quit questioning, assuming it was a hangover that plagued the younger boy.

Instead, he shared his last memory, hoping it would be helpful: “I think I heard you come back. At about nine.”

It was not helpful.

Jungkook frowned and asked, “you were already awake?”

“Well, Namjoon and Yoongi caused a scene on the bus earlier,” Hoseok explained, shrugging one of his shoulders. “They woke everyone up and I couldn’t really fall asleep after that.”

“Oh.”

“But I can’t help you with anything else. Sorry,” he said, biting his lip. “Maybe once your hangover wears off, you’ll remember.”

Jungkook lowered his head because it started to burn when he attempted to shake it in response.

Stubbornly, he mumbled, “I’m never hungover.”

Hoseok was about to laugh but he managed to contain it to a soft snicker. “Well, you’re hungover now, so I don’t know what to tell you.”

“What time is it?” Jungkook asked.

Hoseok had to check his phone first.

“Eleven,” he said.

“Eleven?” Jungkook repeated, his mind fighting against him as he tried to piece the timeline together. “I only slept for… if you saw me at nine, then I only slept for—wait, and you said you hadn’t slept at all?”

Hoseok shook his head, but looking at his phone had distracted him. Truthfully, he hadn’t told Jungkook everything he knew.

He had seen Minjun half-carrying a drunk Jungkook onto the bus at around eight-forty this morning. Hoseok remembered the time because his phone had died about a minute later, and he didn’t get to finish the Falling in Reverse album that he had been listening to on a loop that night.

Minjun’s presence might have sparked a memory, but Hoseok decided not to mention it. He preferred it when Jungkook’s friends weren’t involved in the situations that Jungkook seemed to have forgotten about, and he didn’t want the younger boy to go looking for said friends right away.

“Get something to eat,” Hoseok said, getting up from the bunk. “Pancakes. That’ll help you.”

Eating didn’t sound terrible, but it wasn’t that easy. For one thing, standing up seemed almost like a Herculean task right now—Jungkook was only slightly exaggerating here: he could extend a hand. But a leg? Not so much. And walking was probably completely out of the question.

“Yeah, fine,” he said as he lowered himself face-down onto the mattress, preparing to get out of the bunk—either by crawling or rolling out. “But I need to wash up a bit first. Somehow.”

“Yeah, that’d probably be good,” Hoseok agreed. “You reek of a bar.”

Jungkook glared—more at his pillow than at Hoseok—and mumbled, “thanks for the help.”

“Anytime!” Hoseok said with his usual good-natured laugh. He watched Jungkook try to stand and decided that the younger boy had brought this on himself, so it would do him good to find a way out himself, too. Approaching the door of the bus, Hoseok added, “I’ll wait for you outside. Don’t hurt yourself!”

Straining and grunting, Jungkook managed to wash up, despite his almost unbearable headache and the cramped bathroom of the bus—it was, really, just a toilet and the smallest sink imaginable. He slammed his knees into the wall twice and kicked himself in the shins one and a half times.

He could still taste the whiskey in his mouth, and he thought he could still smell it on himself as well—he’d need a proper shower, maybe several, to get rid of that—but he felt a little better. The improvement was barely noticeable, but it was there, and he got off the bus with a lighter step.

He wondered if the restaurant outside only served pancakes, as Hoseok had advertised, or if they were also prepared to make some other dishes, such as the greasiest, oiliest chicken possible.

When he got off the bus, hoping to find out, he first spotted Hoseok who was lifting his chin and pointing forward, gesturing for him to go on.

Jungkook turned his head and immediately saw you standing right at the entrance of the restaurant. He forgot all about Hoseok and the food.

Right away, he felt an odd sensation in his stomach; something that transcended worry and turned into outright terror. He watched you for a minute, almost petrified. His feet refused to budge as if his body remembered last night better than his mind.

You noticed him in the middle of your conversation with Luna. You saw him freeze first, then eventually start to walk towards you. Right after your eyes met, you looked back at Luna briefly and turned to enter the restaurant without a second glance in his direction.

This was, of course, hardly the reaction Jungkook had been hoping for because one of your last interactions that he could remember with questionable certainty was a kiss.

The horror inside him grew. Something must have really happened last night—something so horrible that his mind chose to drown in alcohol rather than remember it.

Maybe he had found you after Taehyung had talked to you last night, and he’d attempted to make amends, but he was too drunk to tell you everything he needed to tell you…

He had to find out. He had to fix it.

Jungkook walked past Luna, gave her a quick nod hello—and cringed in pain when he moved his head, therefore missing the glare she gave him—and went in after you.

He called out your name, then touched your shoulder. You turned around very slowly, almost reluctantly. He suspected that if he hadn’t touched you, you would have ignored him altogether.

“Can we talk?” he asked.

You gave him one look – maybe even less than that – and turned away, taking a small step to the side to escape his touch.

Before you looked away, it seemed to him that you hadn’t slept at all. He knew you well enough to recognise that. He also knew you well enough to recognise the obvious disapproval on your face—as if you were talking to Sid and not him.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

What happened last night?

“I don’t have time,” you finally said, and his panic deepened.

“Please?” he asked, trailing behind you as you walked towards a table by the window in the farthest corner from the entrance. You’d chosen it as your workspace, but Luna had persuaded you to have breakfast with her and the boys first.

Right away, Jungkook spotted Taehyung, Luna and Yoongi on the other side of the restaurant—all three of them were watching Jungkook follow you.

“I appreciate the manners,” you said as you walked, “but I still don’t have time.”

Close to despair, he whispered—as if your friends could overhear your conversation from across the room, “d-did something happen last night?”

This finally made you turn around and look at him.

Suddenly, he wished you hadn’t.

There was a look in your eyes that reminded him of something. He couldn’t quite place that look, but he felt his chest tighten so much that his heart could barely fit inside, the beating violent and terrified.

It wasn’t anger that he saw when he looked at you. It wasn’t contempt, either. Nor disgust, nor revulsion—it wasn’t anything he had expected to see.

It was a weary disappointment—as if you had been worried about something for a long time, but still hoped it wouldn’t happen, and it did. It happened. And Jungkook realised in horror that he was probably what you were worried about.

“No,” you said, deciding that it wouldn’t do either of you any good to argue here. It scared him, this split-second decision that you made. He wanted you to shout at him, he wanted to see the fire in your eyes. He was afraid of the emptiness he found in them instead. You finished, “nothing significant happened at all. Not last night, or any night before.”

Your words disturbed him. It sounded—and his head began to pound much harder than his heart—like you were talking about all these weeks in Europe. All that the two of you had done together.

He swallowed the concern on his tongue. He still felt half-drunk and three-quarters hungover, so he didn’t know if the assumptions he was making were a result of a hangover paranoia or if he’d interpreted everything you’d said correctly. Honestly, he didn’t even want to know. But he had to ask.

“W-what is that supposed to mean?”

He realised he was clinging onto a tiny, pitiful hope that he’d seen the look in your eyes in a distant nightmare and not right in front of him at the truck stop last night. It seemed more and more unlikely the longer that he waited for you to speak, but while he breathed, he hoped.

“It’s supposed to mean that you need to get something to eat and join the rest of your band,” you said, picking up your coffee cup from the table next to you. Jungkook noticed that there was nothing else on it, just a stack of papers, your laptop, and your phone. “I have work to do.”

Suddenly, he wanted to pause this uncomfortable exchange where the two of you stayed quiet about more things than you expressed. He wanted to tell you that it was you who should have got something to eat. He wanted to remind you not to overwork yourself.

But the way you looked at him was an alarming indication that it wasn’t his place to say these things to you anymore.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck—

“Did you…” Jungkook tried to choose his words carefully. “Did you talk to someone last night? After we got back from the park, I mean?”

You looked startled somehow as you swallowed your coffee and set the empty cup down. Then you gave him a smile with not one bit of humour or kindness behind it, and he felt the skin on the back of his neck prickle with horror.

You did talk to someone. And he made the mistake of asking who it was.

“I didn’t talk to anyone important,” you finally said.

That was enough to confirm all of his foreboding senses.

“You know,” he concluded breathlessly.

Looking away instead of acknowledging his vague—but obviously correct—statement, you picked up your belongings from the table.

“I know enough to see that you need to eat and then sleep this off,” you said. “You smell like a bottle of Jack Daniels.”

You tried to walk past him, but Jungkook moved to block your way.

“Who told you?” he pressed.

You raised your eyebrows at the question.

“Are you—okay.” You closed your eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. You tried to phrase your next words as tactfully as possible, aware that you would have a large audience if you raised your voice here. “It’s a little mind-blowing to me that you think the issue here is who told me. And it’s a lot mind-blowing that you dare to ask me that.”

Uncomfortable under your affronted gaze, Jungkook blinked and looked away. His heavy head was slowly dragging him to the floor, and he leaned against the table for more support.

“I—I’m really sorry,” he said, not daring to look at you again because the emptiness in your eyes was so discomfiting that it felt almost unnatural. He realised, painfully, that he’d taken all of your timid glances for granted. He missed them now—so much.

But as soon as the apology was out of his mouth, he immediately remembered that he had said the exact same words to you. Unfortunately, he had said them to you many times before.

This could have been déjà vu.

It could have been a memory from weeks ago.

But it also could have been a memory from last night.

Now you were hesitating. You didn’t know what he was apologising for specifically, and you suspected that he didn’t know, either. Then you finally nodded your head.

Jungkook worried that you’d come to a decision—a final one, to make up for all the previous times you’d claimed this was final but hadn’t meant it.

Now you looked like you meant it.

You didn’t offer him any relief from his misery and gave him no hints of what had happened after you returned from the park.

Instead, you said, “eat something,” and walked around him.

He didn’t stop you this time. He knew he couldn’t.

But he also knew that he would find you as soon as he figured out how you discovered the truth and whether he talked to you after that.

You joined Yoongi, Taehyung, and Luna at a table in the annexe of the pancake restaurant, right next to a wall-sized window with a view of the vast, completely empty fields of green behind the building.

“Everything okay?” Luna asked as you sat down in the remaining empty chair by the table, next to Yoongi.

You were uncomfortable with everyone’s eyes on you. You knew they’d witnessed the exchange you’d just shared with Jungkook, but you didn’t know what they thought they saw.

“Absolutely,” you replied in a manner so manufactured that they could all tell it was insincere.

While you pretended to be interested in the food that your friends had ordered for you, Yoongi glanced at everyone by the table one after the other.

“Is, uh, something wrong?” he asked, fixing his gaze on you. “With Jungkook?”

“No,” you said. Again, with a noticeable bitterness. “Some tension, that’s all.”

Yoongi was still processing your revelation about Reconnaissance. Yesterday, he had told you that you didn’t have to tell anyone else about it, but he wasn’t sure if he’d really meant it. He assumed you could guess as much. And now he was starting to think that you’d told Jungkook about it, after all.

Carefully, he asked, “did Jungkook get mad at you for not telling him about… things?”

Yoongi wasn’t very good at being discreet. You saw Taehyung frown as he looked up at you.

Taehyung was understandably confused. He thought it was Jungkook who hadn’t told you “things.” Why would he be the one getting mad?

“No,” you said to Yoongi. “I’m the one who’s supposed to be mad here. But it’s fine. I just—I’m not even—I just need a minute.”

Huh, Taehyung thought to himself as he continued to eat in silence. You were obviously seething. Something must have happened.

He had suspected that Jungkook was going to tell you last night when the two of you left together (and, naturally, Taehyung went to find Luna right after witnessing your exit, so he could finally calm himself down). But if Jungkook told you—what the hell was Yoongi on about?

“Well, wait a second,” Yoongi pushed, also very confused. “What do you mean? Why are you mad?”

To him, it seemed like you were prepared to handle the news about Reconnaissance on your own. He thought it was possible that Jungkook had reacted very negatively when you told him and he’d said something upsetting. He knew the vocalist would be unhappy if he found out that you were getting offers to leave Rated Riot.

That would explain—sort of—your emotions. And if that was the case, Yoongi was prepared to interfere.

“Did he say something to you?” he asked. “If he’s upset about this… possibility, then I can talk—”

“Yoongi,” Luna cut in with a rushed whisper. “I don’t think this is about Reconnaissance.”

She was quick to figure out that you had told Yoongi about Nick’s offer—it wasn’t difficult, considering Yoongi was about as vague as a treasure map with a giant X on it. She wanted him to drop the topic before you were forced to admit that this was actually about Jungkook’s bet.

Luna could tell from your body language when you saw Jungkook—and from the way you were about to bend the fork in your hand right now—that you finally knew about the bet, too.

Taehyung, on the other hand, remained simply baffled.

He knew about the bet, sure. But he looked up from his plate again, and correctly guessed from the frowns on everyone’s faces that he was the only one who did not know about this Reconnaissance business that Luna had just mentioned.

“Reconnaissance?” he asked. “What about Reconnaissance?”

He appeared to enjoy saying the band’s name and seemed oblivious to your cringing every time he said it.

You looked up at Luna first—her eyes were wide as she realised that she shouldn’t have mentioned the band outright. To make matters worse, it suddenly occurred to her that you didn’t know that she and Taehyung knew about the bet, so you must have been confused as to why she would divert the topic so suddenly and plunge you straight into a different awkward conversation.

But before she could apologise, you turned to Yoongi, who lowered his head as soon as he met your eyes. He realised that he couldn’t ask Luna what she’d meant—what else could you and Jungkook argue about?—because there was a more important discussion waiting to happen.

You cleared your throat.

“Nothing important,” you finally said. “Their manager contacted me the other day about an open position in their staff, but I told him I wasn’t interested. I mentioned this to, uh—to Luna. And to Yoongi, too, a few days ago.”

You chose not to reveal that Maggie and Namjoon also knew about this, so Taehyung wouldn’t feel as left out as you assumed you had just made him feel.

There were several things that Taehyung struggled to process here. He tried to look at his girlfriend for help first, but Luna purposefully made herself busy by drinking her orange juice. Then he glanced over at his bandmate, but Yoongi turned his entire body away from him to look out the window.

Clearly, neither one of them wanted to explain why they weren’t questioning you about this, so it took Taehyung a minute to find his words.

“But this is…” he started, then paused. “It’s big!”

“Yeah, I—well, you know,” you said while knowing that he didn’t know. You felt guilty and uncomfortable having to explain this right after he found out that you’d kept it from him. “I-I’m happy here. I like what I do. I would—I’d have far less responsibility, but a lot more pressure if I went to work with them.”

Taehyung considered this.

“It would be a great opportunity, t-that’s true,” you added, sounding increasingly uncertain as you spoke. “They’re million-dollar sellers. But I don’t—I want to reach that level with you guys. Not join someone who’s already at the top. Where’s the fun in that?”

You smiled as you finished, hoping to soften the impact of the news. Taehyung finally allowed his muscles to relax a little as he leaned back in his seat and took a sip of his iced tea.

“I see,” he said, placing the glass back on the table. “Okay. So, you’re staying. Right?”

You were on the verge of responding—because you thought you’d just be repeating yourself again—but then you stopped.

You said you were happy here.

You said you weren’t interested in leaving.

But you didn’t, technically, say that you were staying.

You’d said it to Maggie and Luna, and then to Yoongi and Namjoon. But that was before you allowed yourself to confront your feelings for Jungkook while he just tried to win a bet against Sid.

And now you were hesitating.

When you eventually nodded, the assurance from your lips sounded far less convincing. “Mhmm. Yes.”

Silence settled at the table until Luna, still feeling guilty about the slip-up (she would apologise to you as soon as the boys were out of earshot), changed the topic to something completely unrelated: namely the sights she thought would be interesting to see once you were in London.

You hoped to avoid discussing Reconnaissance again, but Nick’s offer had suddenly gained more weight in your mind.

As you returned to your designated workspace after breakfast, you remembered the pros and cons list that Maggie had suggested back in Oslo.

The pros of leaving Rated Riot and joining Reconnaissance had expanded dangerously following your conversation with Jungkook last night.

You worried. You didn’t think you would actually leave, at least not just because of this ridiculous bet. But the more you thought about it—and the more you remembered that Jungkook’s friends were right around here somewhere—the more you couldn’t help it.

Would it really be so terrible to continue your career with a band that had a massive following and did not have your ex-boyfriend as a member, and his good-for-nothing friends as a persistent shadow?

Contrary to what Hoseok had promised and what he had expected himself, eating didn’t make Jungkook feel better. If anything, it only made him feel more irritated.

As he mindlessly chewed the pancakes—which were probably delicious, really, but they tasted like napkins in his hungover mouth—he went over the conversation he’d just had with you.

Again, he arrived at the same conclusion: you knew about the bet.

But everything else in his mind was speculation.

He might have talked to you after you found out, and he might not have handled it very well.

He might not have talked to you after you found out, which was just as bad.

He realised then, with a sinking feeling in his cotton-filled stomach, that he might have also been the one who told you about it.

That would have almost been good, he’d meant to tell you—but when he was sober. And, ideally, without forgetting about it the next day.

He hoped desperately that this wasn’t what had happened. But he needed to know for certain.

He had concluded earlier that only one other person could have talked to you about this, so he pushed his plate away and looked around.

He didn’t spot Taehyung here anymore. But Luna was standing by the cash register.

He stood up and approached her right away.

She didn’t look particularly pleased to talk to him, and Jungkook quickly surmised that she knew about the bet, too. He fully expected this since Taehyung considered her mind an extension of his own. Now, Jungkook thought, he had even more reasons to talk to him.

Luna informed him that Taehyung had felt tired and returned to the bus for a short nap. She said she was waiting to grab some dessert for him.

Jungkook couldn’t thank her for the information quickly enough.

Acting solely on instinct, he ran out of the restaurant, flung open the bus door, and marched inside. He was glad to see that the bus was empty except for Taehyung lying in his bunk.

“Did you tell her?!” Jungkook fired immediately. He wasn’t sure if he’d meant to sound so accusing—he was simply frantic to learn what was hiding in the dark spots of his memory.

Flinching at the sudden shouting that he managed to hear over his music, Taehyung opened his eyes and sat up. He paused the song on his phone and raised his eyes.

He didn’t have to ask what Jungkook meant.

“I didn’t tell her anything,” he said as he pulled his earpods out of his ears and slid them back into their case.

“I saw you talking to her after the show last night. Did you find her and tell her later?” Jungkook demanded through agitated, heavy breaths. “You were with her and Luna at the restaurant just now.”

“I didn’t see her after you left. And all I said to her after the show was that she should talk to you,” Taehyung explained, displaying more patience than most people would under the circumstances. “And I didn’t really talk to her much at the restaurant.”

Slowly—because he was fuming, and the entire bus was red—Jungkook accepted that this was most likely the truth. Your response to him changed after last night, not after the concert. He assumed it was because you’d talked to someone while he wasn’t there, but maybe Taehyung wasn’t that someone.

Again, he remembered Sid. He could still ask him, he supposed, even if he doubted that Sid told you.

But there was a very big problem with this plan. If Sid found out that you knew about the bet, he would immediately amplify all of Jungkook’s problems by claiming that someone broke the rules of the bet—even if Sid was the one who told you.

He’d organise a manhunt, Jungkook didn’t doubt it. Or maybe he’d just blame Jungkook straight away—never mind that the bet ceased to exist to Jungkook the moment he barged into Sid’s room in Amsterdam, and demanded they ended it.

No. It was better to keep Sid out of this.

Jungkook swallowed and shuddered faintly when he felt the bitter aftertaste of everything that he’d drunk last night.

“Did you tell anyone?” he asked Taehyung.

Looking down, Taehyung brought his tongue over his lips. “Well...”

“Anyone other than Luna, I mean.”

“No. You asked me not to. I only told her after I assumed—”

“Okay, well,” Jungkook cut in, guilty suddenly, about forcing his friend into this. “C-could Luna have told her?”

“She could have,” Taehyung admitted. “But she was with me the whole night. And besides, she agreed that it should be you who tells her. That’s what I thought you were going to do last night.”

Jungkook shut his eyes and exhaled so deeply that Taehyung could feel it on his face from two metres away. “I don’t… I was—it would have—”

Interrupting his miserable struggle to construct a full sentence, the older boy reiterated, “we didn’t tell her. Honestly, I assumed that you did.”

Taehyung had had doubts before, but seeing Jungkook’s uncontrollable frustration right now convinced him that you must know about the bet.

Still, Jungkook’s confusion confused him.

It had to be Jungkook who told you. Who else could have?

“Well, I was—” Jungkook swallowed before charging, “actually, wh—what—what right did you have to tell her to talk to me? After I specifically asked you not to tell anyone! She obviously understood that something’s up.”

Taehyung looked offended at the outburst.

But Jungkook couldn’t control himself.

The longer he stayed away from you on the bus, the more he hurt. The more he understood that none of this mattered—not who told you, not what he said to you afterwards.

What mattered was this: he had made the bet. And you knew about it.

And now he wasn’t sure what would happen next and the guilt and the fear and the hurt could not fit in his chest anymore. He desperately needed a real, tangible something to blame his pain on. He needed someone else to be at fault.

“Something is up. And she’s our manager,” Taehyung said. “And you clearly need… managing.”

Childishly, Jungkook retorted, “you don’t know what I need.”

“You told me, because this was bothering you,” the older member said. “I was trying to help you do the right thing.”

Jungkook frowned so deeply that a permanent wrinkle was slowly beginning to form on his forehead. Then, he finally relaxed his face and stopped moving altogether—to breathe instead. And to think.

Perhaps, he thought as he rushed to inhale and exhale as if he was being pursued by the invisible horrors that he had battled last night and this morning—perhaps the look in your eyes that he’d seen today hadn’t come from a nightmare, after all.

It couldn’t have been Sid who told you. And it wasn’t Taehyung. It wasn’t Luna.

You looked at him like it was him.

“It—it must have—it was—” He inhaled and held his breath for one, two, three seconds. “You’re right. I-I must have told her. It was—I did—I-I told her.”

Taehyung watched as acceptance darkened Jungkook’s already hopeless eyes.

“I was really—I still feel kind of drunk, but I was even more wasted last night,” he continued, staring at the floor. He was breathing so rapidly now that he could have powered every streetlight in this whole city if they ran on oxygen and not electricity. “Maybe I was the one who told her. No one else could have, and it—it should have been me anyway, but I—it was—”

“Okay,” Taehyung said, quickly realising the direness of the situation. He put an arm around the younger boy’s shoulder. “Why don’t you sit down?”

Jungkook hadn’t realised he was standing.

He didn’t feel Taehyung lower him onto his bunk, he didn’t feel the soft mattress underneath, he didn’t feel his friend’s hands around him.

All he felt was an oddly familiar tremor taking over his body—as if he’d already been here, shaking uncontrollably in another life.

Taehyung was aware of the predicament that Jungkook was in. Really, he was. But, honestly, he was proud of him for telling you the truth. He probably shouldn’t have felt this way, considering that telling you about the bet was common sense, but he couldn’t help it.

He was glad that Jungkook had chosen honesty—even though Taehyung hadn’t really given him a different choice, and the truth had made the younger boy nearly transparent as his shoulders hunched under his friend’s touch.

Taehyung wanted to believe that this honesty, despite how much discomfort and pure pain it brought Jungkook, signified growth. And with growth came the decision to choose better friends.

However, telling you about the bet and then forgetting about it? That was bad. Taehyung didn’t want to imagine how bad.

He sighed, releasing one breath in the time that Jungkook released ten.

“Maybe you should talk to her. When you’re a little more put together,” Taehyung suggested, hoping that a clear plan of action would calm Jungkook down.

“She won’t talk to me,” he said, and his breaths grew more ragged.

“Ah.” Taehyung raised his head knowingly. He needed a moment to compose himself before he admitted that he knew this would happen—and that Jungkook deserved this silent treatment just a little bit. “Yes. Well… That—that was to be expected, I would think.”

Despite his words, there was a comforting warmth in Taehyung’s eyes that Jungkook missed because he was too preoccupied with fighting his inner demons. He remembered something else—a sharp tension in his lungs, much like the one he was experiencing right now, as he struggled to contain everything that he was inhaling: revulsion and regret, despair and dread.

He had told you. He couldn’t remember it exactly, but he knew he had.

Jungkook managed to raise his eyes.

“W-what—what do I do?” he asked in between breaths.

Taehyung sucked his lips in. “I have no idea.”

Jungkook groaned as he ran his shaking fingers through his hair and pulled away from the other boy.

“For fuck’s s-sake,” he hissed, then took another unsteady breath. “You could—you could try being more helpful, you know.”

“You could try giving me less attitude, you know,” Taehyung returned. “Considering your position.”

Jungkook scrunched his nose irritably but refrained from arguing. His breathing began to slow as he shifted his focus from regretting the past to fixing the future.

“Fine,” he said. “Sorry. Please help me figure this out.”

There wasn’t much that Taehyung could have helped him with, and they both knew it. What Jungkook really needed was just encouragement that this wasn’t over yet. That he could still do something and hope for a positive outcome.

Taehyung contemplated this for a minute. A part of him honestly thought that this might be over. But as much as he valued honesty, he knew that sometimes it wasn’t the best option.

This was one of those times.

Not to mention, there were two sides to this coin.

The first was that you and Jungkook had known each other for years before you began to work together. Taehyung virtually knew nothing about your relationship prior to Rated Riot. He knew nothing of your history together. Maybe there was potential for resolution, after all.

However, the other side of the coin was this: you had an incredible opportunity to work with one of the biggest rock bands in the world. And even though the vocalist of this band was prone to alcohol, he was not prone to toxic friendships—at least as far as Taehyung knew. Not to mention, you hadn’t dated anyone in Reconnaissance, which had to be a massive plus after all that had just happened here. And so, although you said you would stay with Rated Riot, no one would have blamed you if you left.

Taehyung sighed.

This was a very, very unpleasant situation, to say the least.

“Alright. There’s something you should know,” the older boy finally said. “I don’t know if it’s going to be helpful for you, but, um… sh-she got an offer to work with Reconnaissance.”

Jungkook heard the way all the sounds inside the bus and inside his head and even inside his chest suddenly ceased, leaving only a faint buzzing.

He wasn’t sure what was buzzing. Maybe he hadn’t realised he was screaming.

“Wh—what?” he asked after a loaded minute. “She—what? When?”

“I don’t know,” Taehyung said. “I just found out today.”

“So, she’s—what? She’s leaving?”

“I don’t know.”

Jungkook got up from his bunk and spun around, restless all of a sudden, as he ran his fingers through his hair again, messing it up even more. “Fuck.”

Taehyung gave him a moment to process this.

“What do I do?” Jungkook repeated, his breathing uneven again. Taehyung tensed when he heard the panic return to his friend’s voice. He stood up, but couldn’t reach Jungkook as he paced away from him on the bus. “What the f—what do I say? S-she won’t talk to me. Fuck.”

“Give her some time, then,” Taehyung said—quickly. Because he could tell that Jungkook was approaching a concerning new level of distress. “She just found out about the bet. This must have been quite a shock to her. It was shocking for me, and I have nothing to do with this. So, imagine how she must feel.”

“Okay. But it’s—what if she—”

“She’s not impulsive,” Taehyung cut in, guessing the younger boy’s concern. “She won’t just get up and leave. But if you keep pushing right now while the—” He clicked his tongue, looking for a more sensitive word. “—while the shock is still fresh, then you might end up pushing her towards the wrong decision.”

That sounded reasonable. Painful and terrifying, too, but reasonable, nonetheless.

Jungkook slid his hands down his face and spent a minute inhaling and exhaling in two-second increments. Then he nodded and looked up at the other boy.

“Yeah. Okay,” he decided. His head still felt like he had stolen it from a bronze sculpture—heavy, yet completely empty. But he thought he was gradually getting used to the pain. “You’re right. Okay. So, I should wait, right? Just… wait?”

“That’s what I’d do,” Taehyung said. “Wait.”

And so, waiting was what Jungkook did. For exactly six hours.

By then, everyone had already returned to the bus for the trip to Cologne, and the French bus driver had finished half a pack of cigarettes. You were unaware that it was just you and Jungkook left outside—you were still on the phone with the other roadies—and Jungkook used that to his advantage.

Anticipating your usual excuse of being too busy, he prepared in advance and spoke to the bus driver to find out the scheduled departure time. He learned that he should have enough time to have a proper conversation with you or, at the very least, address some of the drunken confessions that he must have made last night.

He had promised himself to hold off speaking to you in hopes that his mind would clear and he could remember a bit more—anything other than this suffocating misery that still kept him in a relentless chokehold today. But that promise was in vain.

He couldn’t wait.

“I need to talk to you,” Jungkook said as soon as he saw you come out from behind the bus.

Just as he had expected, you shook your head. “Now’s not the right—”

“We still have twenty-five minutes before we leave,” he said.

“It wouldn’t hurt to be ahead of schedule,” you argued, but he refused to move, so you couldn’t reach the bus door. “The equipment team had already left. We have to—”

“Please. Give me five minutes,” he said. “Please.”

As you were beginning to look away from him, your eyes involuntarily lingered on his face for a moment longer, and you felt your heart make the decision for you. You’d give him five minutes.

Really, the ache in your chest was just an excuse, as you realised in a fleeting moment of sober clarity. Your mind didn’t want to walk away from him, either.

He looked hurt—he had no right to look that way, not after what he’d done—but the look in his eyes still cut into your already wounded heart a little more.

You couldn’t remember if he had looked like this last night. All that you could see after he told you about the bet were the dangerous ripples of the ground beneath you and the unyielding darkness surrounding you.

You’d listen to him, you decided. That was all that you could still offer him.

“Fine,” you conceded, realising that you had a weakness, and it was standing right in front of you.

Jungkook inhaled—he’d managed to get his breathing under control in the past few hours—and straightened.

He’d seen this before, he thought. This moment that hadn’t even happened yet already echoed in his mind like a forgotten passage from a book that his grandmother had used to read to him—about heartache and the eventual happily ever after. He was too young for those books, really, he just wanted to be in grandma’s room longer. But he remembered the glistening tears in her eyes as she turned the last few pages, and he, too, found himself rooting for the people in the book.

Surely, then, if this was the painful part of the story—the part where the two characters couldn’t look at each other at the same time—then you had to be approaching the conclusion? The happy ending that he found himself dreaming about for the first time in Paris?

All that was left for the two of you was to resolve it all.

“I was very drunk last night,” he started. “I should have told you the truth before I got drunk, but the way the night unfolded… it didn’t work in my favo—okay, that—that sounds like an excuse. But I want you to know that I had the intention to tell you all along. It wasn’t something that I decided on a whim after I had some drinks.”

“Hmm.” You were staring at your shoes before you pursed your lips and glanced up at him. “And, uh, what about the bet? Was that something you made on a whim?”

Something very unpleasant churned in his stomach. He felt queasy.

“I did,” he admitted. “I was—it was—I thought it would prove a point.”

“Did it?”

“No. All it proved is that I made the wrong choice of caring about what my friends thought of me, when I should have cared about what you thought,” he said. His jaw was clenched, but his face was soft and almost fragile. You looked away again. His words sounded clumsy when you weren’t looking at him, when he didn’t know if you heard him. “I-I’m sorry. I swear I meant it when I said I loved—”

“Look,” you said, crossing your arms over your chest. “I don’t really see the point of this conversation, so maybe—”

“Okay—okay, just—listen,” he said in a hurry, raising both of his hands to the back of his head in a desperate attempt to keep himself together. Reluctantly, you returned your gaze to his. “I-I wanted to say that you can ask me, or say anything to me. I want to talk. Give me a chance to explain.”

“I don’t have anything to say to you, though,” you said, and he felt his heart fall and thrash in the cavities of his chest like a frightened, dying fish out of the water.

He tried to remember if this was what you’d said to him last night—this brutal declaration that you’d run out of words—perhaps right after he told you about the bet.

It would have explained why he felt smothered the whole day—as if your decision to talk to him directly influenced his decision to breathe.

“Okay,” he said, swallowing something sharp in his throat. “Well, what about Reconnaissance?”

Your eyes widened for less than a second before you composed yourself. It confirmed to him that everything Taehyung had said was true.

“How did you—?” you began to ask, but Jungkook didn’t let you finish.

“Taehyung told me. You didn’t—you told everyone, but you couldn’t tell me.”

Despite the twinge of guilt in your stomach, you still thought this was an unfair accusation. You hadn’t told everyone. And Jungkook was the last person who could have reprimanded you for keeping a secret.

“This has nothing to do with you,” you said.

“How—” he started, then cut himself off with a scoff. “You’re leaving, and it has nothing to do with me?”

“I’m not—I’m still here, aren’t I?” you countered, changing your mind about making a promise to stay when chaos roamed free in your mind.

Jungkook recognised the hesitation in your eyes. He felt his anger grow at the possibility that you were genuinely considering this.

“Yeah, but for how long?!” he accused. “I thought—I thought we were finally on the same page about everything, and—”

“Oh!” you exclaimed; the single syllable so full of irony that he stopped talking immediately. “On the same page, are we? Okay, then, let me see if I got everything right here.”

There was that fire in your eyes—the one that he had wanted to see.

He felt equal parts terrified—because he couldn’t predict what you’d say next—and hopeful—because you were finally talking to him—as he watched you instead of replying.

“You made a bet with Sid about us,” you said—short and sharp. Jungkook thought he flinched, but he hoped you didn’t notice.

“Yes,” he said. “And I—”

“He said we wouldn’t get back together, and you said we would.”

Jungkook nodded, his throat suddenly too swollen to speak.

“And if you lost,” you continued. “You had to give up your Katana.”

“Mmhm.”

You paused here, frowning. You weren’t sure if you’d forgotten this part or if he hadn’t mentioned it last night.

“And if you won?” you asked.

He felt an unpleasant warmth wash over him at your question.

“I’d, uh—I would have gotten $10,000,” he admitted, his eyes darting between you and the ground. “And, you know. Uh, also you.”

“Ah.” You nodded. “Double win, isn’t it?”

He cringed at the sarcasm.

You continued to watch him with narrowed eyes, but you couldn’t really see him, blind to everything but the raging fury that swirled inside you, pounding on the walls of your chest to get out.

It wasn’t even the bet that you were mostly angry about, not really. You were angry about his choices in general. About his constant need to do whatever his friends told him to. About his utter lack of ability to stand up for himself—and for you.

You were angry that you were back to where you started, back on the doorstep of his dorm room four years ago, when you said you were done, and he did nothing to stop you from leaving.

You were sure you’d had a point you wanted to make when you brought up the bet a few minutes ago, perhaps to counter his attempts to blame you for not telling him about Reconnaissance. But you didn’t want to make any points anymore.

You didn't even want to speak.

“It really sounds fun,” you commented dryly. “Shame you didn’t win.”

“Y-you’re—but I-I don’t care if I win or lose,” he stammered, anguished by your dismissive tone. “That’s why I told you about it. The bet was a mistake. But I can’t turn the fucking time back, even though I really fucking want to. So I’d rather tell you and lose it than win it and lose you. There’s nothing I want more than—I’m—I just want to be honest. And I was honest. Every time I told you how I felt, I meant it.” He inhaled, rushing to get all his words out before he truly lost you—he saw the way you positioned your body away from him as soon as he mentioned honesty. “I was drunk when I told you about the bet, I know. I shouldn’t have been. But I told you, and—”

“See—no,” you cut him off. “You don’t get to feel good about that. You forgot that you told me.”

“I…” his sentence broke off. “I-I did. Okay. That’s true. And I’m sorry. I was really—I was drunk.”

“You’re always fucking drunk.”

You finally turned away as you groaned and allowed the wind to tangle your hair around the hood of your jacket.

You were exhausted of these same old excuses: either he was drunk, or he was with his friends. Sometimes both.

You thought you’d walked away from all of this four years ago. How had you ended up back in the exact same place? Why did you think it would be different this time?

Sid was still here. And his endless games were still here, too.

“Oh.” You remembered suddenly and turned back around. “Was this what the Paris trip was about? When we went to Kihyun and Chloé’s wedding? Is that why Sid didn’t want me to go with you?”

Jungkook closed his eyes. “It’s, uh… yes. It’s sort of what started the, um—the whole thing. But it wasn’t—I actually wanted to go there with you, it wasn’t—”

You hummed, cutting him off—as if you were a teacher, giving him a test, and he was a student, answering every question correctly, but letting you down every time he opened his mouth anyway.

You didn’t say anything else.

Jungkook thought he was going to burst into flames.

He could tell that you didn’t want to listen to him when he said he loved you. In fact, you made a conscious decision not to hear him.

He was horrified to realise that these past few weeks and all the conversations, all the unsaid words that you finally said, all the closure that you’d welcomed after years of evading it—all of it had evaporated after last night.

You refused to remember these moments, refused to believe that they were real.

He wasn’t just back to where he started when this tour began—back when you wouldn’t accept his confessions. When you tried to explain his feelings for you using the circumstances: a different continent, too many forgotten memories, too much time spent together. And you were right, in part, to have your doubts. He really hadn’t told you everything. But everything that he had told you, he’d meant it.

But now he was much farther back—at the very last row, merely observing your silhouette as you climbed on stage and introduced yourself in a cold, detached voice. Like he didn’t know you. Like he hadn’t spent the past seven years loving you.

One bet. One fucking bet.

And now he was scared that there was nothing else left.

Gripping the stitching on the sides of his dark grey jeans, Jungkook said one more time, “I’m sorry.”

You were looking down as you repeatedly nodded your head—each nod a new dagger in his chest.

“Thank you for that,” you said, letting the sentence falter.

It was clear that you’d meant what you said—you had nothing else to say. He would have liked to hear anything, really, except for the silence that followed.

“W-what can I do?” he asked, afraid that the conversation—that all of your conversations— had come to an end.

You frowned—all of your conversations had come to an end.

“What do you mean?” you asked almost incredulously.

“Well, you’re clearly mad, and—”

“No,” you said. “I briefly flew over mad last night when you pulled me out of the bus at six-thirty in the morning. Now I’m back to normal.”

Biting his lip ring and pulling it into his mouth, Jungkook stayed quiet for a few seconds.

He had expected this to be awful, meaning you’d be angry.

He hadn’t expected this to be worse than awful; meaning you’d stand here, looking at him with a straight face and hollow eyes, almost daring him to apologise again.

Now it’s finally too late, your posture was saying. You fucked up one too many times.

You truly weren’t mad, he realised.

You’d given up.

“And w-what—what is ‘normal,’ exactly?” he asked finally, even though he feared the answer.

You hammered the final nail into the coffin that he’d built himself.

“I’m your manager,” you said. What a great eulogy. “You should get back on the bus. We’re leaving soon.”

He knew he needed to apologise again, but nothing he said seemed to make a difference. You weren’t hearing him—and, honestly, he understood why.

But a part of him still felt frustrated. You had kept something from him, too. There was a risk you’d leave—forever—and he needed conditions; something he could do to make this right. To make you stay.

It was a stupid bet. He never should have made it. It was bad, but in comparison to his feelings for you—and yours for him, before he ruined everything—he didn’t think it was significant enough to make you consider leaving your job.

“You’re right,” he said. “You’re my manager. And you can’t—you can’t leave the band.”

The determination in his tone made you pause.

“I can’t?” you repeated, your eyebrows drawn together in a defiant frown. “And who would stop me if I said I was leaving?”

Fuck, Jungkook thought in a sudden panic. That was not what he should have said. Now you might really leave.

Taehyung had warned him that he might push you towards the wrong decision. And he was doing exactly that.

“You—you know what I mean...” he faltered, discouraged by your resistance. “I-I fucked up, I know that. Tell me how to fix it.”

“There’s nothing to fix,” you said. “Get on the bus.”

He stood still. “Is this how it’s going to be from now on?”

“It’s going to be like it always was,” you said. “Get on the fucking bus, Jungkook.”

He didn’t. You were so close to him now that he could smell your perfume and the apple scent of your shampoo. He remembered himself years ago, hoping that one day, apples would stop reminding him of you.

Now he knew how outrageously absurd it was to hope for this when he was convinced that all versions of him—across all universes—always immediately thought of you whenever they tasted apples.

“Don’t—you can’t start treating me like everything that happened between us didn’t happen,” he retorted—with all the anger that he had at the thought of never having you this close to him again.

“What happened, exactly?” you snapped. “You’ve clearly never bothered to be honest with me for one second until last night, never bothered to even think about me, because you—”

“I thought about you all the time, though!”

“Yeah, because you had no other fucking choice!” you rebutted. “If you didn’t think of me, you would have lost the bet. None of it was genuine—”

“I lost the bet because I was thinking of you,” he defended, furiously waving his hands around.

“Oh! That’s so considerate!” Your laughter was rigid and bitter. “Maybe it’s me who should apologise. I’m so sorry I ended up being the reason why you lost the bet.”

He dropped his hands, groaning. Once again, he realised how terrible he was at telling the truth, and how splendid at saying all the wrong things.

“Don’t—don’t be like that,” he asked, agitated.

You glared at him. “Like what?”

“Just—difficult.”

“Oh, that’s fine,” you said. “I’ll make this very simple for you: we’re done talking about your shit.” You pulled back from him to turn around. “Get on the fucking bus. I have more important things to do.”

Immediately, Jungkook grabbed both of your hands to stop you from leaving.

You turned back to him with wide eyes, and your stunned stiffness gave him enough time to properly wrap his fingers around your wrists.

“Is that your plan, then?” he demanded. His hands were cold, but his grip was loose enough for you to push him away—but the challenge in his question made you wait, frozen in place. “You’re just going to walk away again? Start working with a different band so you won’t have to think about your feelings? Won’t have to face your fears of trying again? That’s your solution for everything, isn’t it? Just fucking walking away.”

He'd touched something—there was a raw wildfire in your eyes now, nothing like the flames he’d seen before.

You yanked your hand out of his grip and took a step back.

“You know what?” you said. “It is. It is my solution to everything. And you want to know something else? This bet isn’t even the worst thing. And that’s the worst thing—the fact that this is just another bullet point in an endless list of shit that you and your friends have done. So, yes. I am walking away. I should have never even come back in the first place.”

Jungkook felt the ground beneath his feet tremble unsteadily at your words—much like his hands by his sides.

Back in Amsterdam, you’d told him that you forgave him for not realising how many mistakes he’d made in your relationship. He’d seen a glimpse of a second chance that night in your hotel room.

He was aware of his never-ending list of mistakes now. And still, he made new ones.

“I’m—I’m sorry, I—”

“Get on the bus,” you said, turning around to face the empty parking lot instead of his apologetic face. “I still need to call the other drivers and check in with the rest of the crew.”

You were doing your job. You were still talking to him. He should have been glad.

Instead, he couldn’t force his legs to move or his heart to keep beating.

“I… Can—can you just—just tell me that you’ll stay with the band,” he pleaded.

Your shoulders were straight as you stood with your back to him, your hands clenched into distraught fists by your sides. He’d once jokingly tried to teach you the proper stance in a fight. Really, it was you who should have done the teaching.

“Get on the bus,” you repeated.

His distress was relentless. “I will. But we have to talk about—”

“We don’t have to do anything,” you argued. “I think it’s better if we stop having conversations unrelated to Rated Riot altogether, if that’s alright with you.”

He watched your back with unwavering determination. “It’s not.”

“Tough. Get in.”

He needed a minute to convince himself to quit arguing, to drain the fight out of his chest. Then another minute to steady his breathing enough to turn towards the bus.

As he approached the door, he looked back at you and caught the way you had glanced at him over your shoulder. There was a dampness in your eyes from the heavy wind. He saw it right before you turned away again.

He swayed lightly on the steps of the bus. “Please, just—”

“Don’t,” you said, and your shaky voice turned the word into a warning rather than an order. “Just get in. We’re done talking.”

With your back still turned to the bus, you heard Jungkook climb the steps, seemingly hesitate once more, and then finally walk inside. The automatic door slammed shut behind him with a dull thud that was almost as loud as the defeated beats of your heart in your chest.

Alone in the parking lot, you finally exhaled all that you’d kept inside and then some. You wanted your lungs to feel as empty as your chest.

For just a minute, you couldn’t be Rated Riot’s manager.

For just a minute, you needed to be yourself and by yourself as you squatted, hugging your knees to your chest.

Your laboured breaths made you rock on your feet slightly as your chest rose and fell at an increasing pace, but you resisted the throbbing hurt inside—you couldn’t cry. You wouldn’t.

In a minute, you’d have to check on the band and make sure all of them were on the bus before leaving for Cologne.

In a minute, you’d have to face Jungkook again and talk to him as if nothing had happened.

You squeezed your eyes shut.

The bet was hurtful. But what hurt even more was your own choice to let it all escalate to the point where losing it all again hurt. Still wanting him, even now, hurt. His unchanging priorities—his friends first, everyone else second—hurt.

You didn’t want to talk to him as if nothing had happened. But you had to.

Maybe it was for the better. The bet was a cold shower, jolting you awake and reminding you that trying again never worked.

And really, perhaps you should have seen this coming. You knew that this was just another one of Sid’s games that Jungkook had willingly participated in. Truly, this was nothing new in your experience and hardly different from Sid dropping Jungkook off at the grimiest bar in town and sending you on a scavenger hunt to find him—night, after night, after night.

You stood up with a sharp inhale.

You’d had enough.

If Jungkook wanted to continue playing, he could do it by himself. You refused to be a part of it again.

However, ending things with Jungkook and ensuring that he didn’t win this bet didn’t feel like your win, either.

It felt like you both lost.

chapter title credits: bad omens, “the fountain”

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pinasscoladaa · 1 month

Text

Straight in….to the wrong net - Kerstin Casparij x Reader

As soon as the ball hit the back of the net you couldn’t control the laugh that was let out of your mouth, 3-0 up and your girlfriend had just put one.. her first one into the back of the net.. the wrong net.. making it an own goal. You saw the look in kerstins face as the ball went in, almost in slow motion the sheer disbelief that she had been the one to give united a goal in citys very dominant derby.

However you knew yourself and your girlfriend’s humour so as all the played returned to their position you made a brief stop over to kerstin, grabbing her shoulders and shaking them before imitating the commentators and shouting, “and its down the front line, city’s number 18 getting possession back of the ball and what this… SHE SENDS IT RIGHT INN….TO THE WRONG NET”

Your city teammates seemed to have heard your interaction and were quick to laugh along as you returned to your position, being jokingly pushed there faster by your girlfriend who was trying not to laugh along.

The game concluded at 3-1, once again proving that manchester is infact blue, and as soon as the final whistle blew you felt a body jump up onto your back, being quick to catch it before it fell you felt the body lean over your shoulder and kiss all over your cheek. Turning your head to meet her lips you pecked them a few times before she began laughing softly, “did i really just do that?” she mumbled, hiding her face in your shoulder.

“Yes baby, yes you did. but congratulations on your first goal my lovely” you chuckled, still teasing the dutch girl as you walked the bothbof you round the ethiad, clapping for the fans who never failed to show up for your team. Feeling a small smack to the side of your head and the groan into your shoulder from your girlfriend only made you laugh harder, quickly feeling her begin laughing along too.

You and kerstin weren’t shy to show your relationship on social media, the both of you loving showing eachother off, quickly gaining the title as City’s “it” couple, the both of you always interacting with fans together and then laughing at the clips posted of the interactions later on, so you weren’t surprised to find the clips flooding your social feed of you teasing kerstin after her goal, fans all over the wsl loving your guys relationship were quick to share and repost the clip, much to kerstins dismay, however much she wanted to admit it she loved it secretly. So a few hours after the game when you found yourself of your girlfriend’s instagram yet again.. you reposted the clip to your own socials before cuddling into your girlfriends side in your shared apartment, finding comfort in your girls arms after a long day.

“i love you mijn vriendin” she whispered into your hair, kissing the top of your head.

“i love you. forever, my baby.”

#woso community #woso imagine #woso x reader #woso fanfics #woso blurbs #woso #woso one shot #kerstin casparij #kerstin casparij x reader

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norrisleclercf1 · 1 year

Text

Little Backstabber

Pairing: Max Verstappen x Wolff!Reader

Warning: Angst, angst just pure angst, some fluff, Max is a Toto apologist, the reader is just hurting, Max has no respect for that

Requested: Yes/No

Rating: PG-13

Words: 2.3K

A/N: Hahahahaha I’m sorry (not really)

Part 1: Little Traitor

Pt.3 Little Heartbreaker

Breaking News: Max Verstappen and Y/N Wolff Announce Their Engagement

Toto stares out the window as Susie reads the newspaper out loud during breakfast. Laying the newspaper down, she gazes at her husband as he doesn't say a word, not even turning to acknowledge what she has read.

"Toto, maybe tell her how happy you are for her?" Susie mumbles over her coffee cup, which has his eyes cut to her.

"I called my daughter a slut; she doesn't want to hear from me. But, can you?" He asks, laying his glasses down as he rubs his eyes.

"No, I will not." Susie snips, sitting her cup down harshly.

He just nods, not preaching the topic anymore since it's been a strain between them.

"Y/n? Angel? Where are you?" Max yells, seeing your boxes piled up in his place, but it doesn't make him angry; pride and other cavemen's feelings cover his mind as he stops seeing you in the kitchen.

You danced in the kitchen wearing a Redbull shirt and dark blue panties, clearly, nothing else. Hair is thrown up, and you are just enjoying yourself.

"God, I love you." He whispers, still not letting you know he is home. Home. It was weird for you to call this place home, but it felt right.

You spin around but stop halfway to seeing the figure and scream.

Max laughs, which calms you down immediately, knowing it is your fiance and not some stranger. You hold your chest, trying to calm down as he just reduces to giggles walking up to you, pulling your hands gently. You let him pull your body into his, both bodies molding perfectly in the hug as he whispers comforting words.

"You scared me." You laugh, rubbing his back as his chest shakes yours with his laugh again.

"Oh het spijt me, zat gewoon naar mijn bloedmooie verloofde te staren." (Oh I'm sorry, was just staring at my gorgeous fiancee) He laughs making you slap his chest.

You've started to perfect your Dutch after Max proposed to you; you had always spoken Dutch, but not comfortably, and now you could converse with him.

"The press released our engagement announcement today. It's in the newspapers." He mumbles, leaning back slightly to kiss your forehead.

"Yes, I know. Susie sent her congratulations." Your tone sour.

After everything with your father, you refused to go anywhere near Mercedes, even keeping away from Lewis and Geroge, who sided with your father. Your stepmother tried her best, but you didn't want to talk to them, much less think about them. Max makes a noise but doesn't say anything. There have been multiple arguments about your family and what to do regarding the wedding. You didn't want them there, no invitations or anything. Why should people who constantly let you down throughout your life be welcomed to the day of embracing your new one?

"Don't, Max." You noted the noise and pulled away from him, returning to the counter and fixing lunch for the both of you.

"I just......he's your father. He should be there when we're married." He groans, pulling his hair slightly with annoyance.

"No." Is all you say, making Max drop the conversation and look over your shoulder at what you're preparing. He smiles, seeing the potatoes, onion, carrot, and cabbage beside the smoked sausages.

"You're making Stamppot?" He asks, dropping his head to kiss your shoulder, able to see the tension fade away.

"Yes, it's slightly chilly out, and I figured it'd be good and healthy since you can't eat certain foods." You mumble, trying to get around your irritation with Max.

"I'm sorry." He whispers, touching your wrist and stopping you from chopping the cabbage.

"Just, why can't you understand? You were able to work out your issues with your father, but mine? I can't. So stop." You pull your wrist away from his fingers and continue chopping the cabbage.

Max nods his head and walks away, heading to his Sim. Hearing his footsteps enter the den, you drop your head and stare at the gorgeous ring on your finger. It's a stunning natural blue sapphire with a daisy oval shape, little diamonds aline it, with a gold band holding it all together. Max had the ring specially crafted for you; he had the idea of the ring for a while now. He knew you weren't big on diamonds, so he set on a sapphire. Cliche, but he picked one closest to the RB color, a final stamp to show people that you were his and you weren't going anywhere.

You loved the ring, Max, and your little life together. It terrified you that if your father came back into your life, to your wedding. He'd ruin it all. Shaking off the evil thoughts, you get back to cooking the lunch. Time passes with you cooking and listening to Max curse the Sim, potting the Stamppot. You gently carry Max's bowel to him and sit it on the desk.

Max pauses it immediately and turns around in his chair, looking up at you; from the look on his face, he clearly has something to say.

"If it's about my father, keep it to yourself." You warn, Max automatically turning back around to the Sim and hitting play.

"I think you'll regret it." Max mumbles, but you ignore the comment and head to the bedroom sitting on the bed.

You reach under the bed, pull out this little black box, and open it, your father and your smiling face greeting you. You kept all your childhood pictures of your father or postcards from when he was traveling around the world. Each one had his familiar writing on the back, each word etched into your brain. Each praise, love, how much he loved you, missed you, couldn't wait to see you. Where did it all go wrong? Why did he leave you? Why weren't you worthy or made him proud enough? Why?

Swallowing the tears, you put the lid back on and slide it back under the bed. Max stands at the cracked door, watching you hide the box, the one you thought he knew nothing of. He knew your father should be at the wedding, he knew that's what you wanted, but you couldn't see past your anger and hurt. Max understood, but he knew the best for the both of you would be inviting Toto to the wedding.

Stepping away from the door, he grabs his phone and pulls up Toto's number. Don't ask why he has it. He just does.

You're invited to the wedding, don't fuck up this opportunity; see you on July 1st at 7 pm at Hotel de Paris.

Max hits sent and watches as the text is read automatically. The 3 bubbles pop up and then go away. This continues for about 15 minutes until the text returns, making Max scuff slightly, but glad to see Toto answered.

Thank you for the invite, we'll be there.

Clearly, Suise was helping the man answer the text, but in the end, Toto gave his curt answer, and that was that. Max wasn't going to tell you what he had done, but he knew that you'd come around in time for the wedding and invite Toto and Suise, but it was his secret for now. Of course, telling Toto you had no idea he was invited doesn't occur to him, but he'll worry about that later.

"Baby?" Max yells down the hall, and you emerge quickly, worried something is wrong.

"What?" You ask, looking around the apartment, ready for an issue, but all he sees is Max sitting on the couch.

"I apologize. I know the relationship with your father isn't like mine, and I should leave it be, and I will. No more talk about it. I'll let you go at your own pace. But just know, if we have kids, he needs a chance, and that's all I'm saying on the topic." Max sighs, catching his breath from his little rant.

"I love you." You whisper, walking over and kissing him. Max smiles and pulls you down, having you lay on top of him.

At this moment, everything was perfect, until 4 weeks later.

You're walking home when you see a present sitting at your door, you weren't expecting a package so you look at the address and see it was from Susie. Sighing, you lean down and pick it up. Shocked by the weight, you stumble into the place and set it on the coffee table. Opening the box, you pull out the brown paper and freeze, seeing what is in the box.

There was a transparent glass collage of you and Max lined with your favorite flowers, and on the bottom were gold words engraved.

If I were the moon, I would want you to be my night

You stare at the words, knowing those words deeply. Your father always wrote quotes on the back of your postcards. This was the last quote he wrote you before it all fell apart. You pick up one of the smaller boxes with shaky hands and open it. You can't help the tears that start to fall.

It was this small tiara, but not any tiara. It was a baroque crystal pearl tiara with very two rows of diamonds; on the top, pearls sat on top. It was gorgeous, but you felt your inner child's heartbreak. He remembered. When you were younger, you and your father walked past this old antique boutique in the front window and sat this same tiara; it was crazy expensive. You didn't even tell Toto that you wanted the tiara; you just stared at it and then kept walking down the street. But he did remember, after dropping you off at your mother's, he circled back and bought it. He kept it for the day you'd get married and thought he would hand it to you in person, telling you how much he loved you and was proud of the woman you've become, but instead.....he had to send it to you through a box.

Sitting down, you grab the last box, opening it as a watch for Max. On the back was the first date you two ever had. But, the inscription was in Toto's handwriting. How he knew it that date was beyond your knowledge. Something catches your eye, making you sit the watch down to pick it up. It was a card.

Opening the card, you scan the words, but one sentence catches your attention.

Thank you for the invitation, we can't wait to see you and Y/n tie the knot. Much love from Susie and Toto

You stare at the words before they dawn on you. Max. He invited them. After you told him you didn't want them there, he still asked them and did it without notifying you. Time passed by you, and nothing made you move until you heard Max's keys in the door.

"Hey love, I'm home!" Max called, having a great day. He couldn't wait to see you.

Walking into the living room, he smiles brightly seeing you but stops seeing the emotionless look on your face. He looks at the box and then back to you before you slam the card down, finally looking at him.

"You bastard." You whisper, shaking your head. You feel this hot rage boiling inside you, but your throat gets tighter and tighter with each passing of time.

"He's your father." He whispers, knowing what the box means. Toto must've sent a gift or something and probably told you on a card that he was invited.

"He LEFT ME!" You scream, moving away from the box to stand before Max.

"You both left each other! Why can't you see that he's been trying!" Max snaps, tired of this back-and-forth argument.

"I was 14. What do you want from me, Max? He was the adult; he should've tried. It's not my job!" You yell, not wanting to talk about this anymore.

"When he reached out to you, we were 16, we had just had our first date, and he called you. You didn't answer the phone and said you'd call him back. But you never did. That showed him you didn't care anymore. Why would he try with someone who didn't even try either." Max argues. This shocks you. How could someone who not even 6 months ago defend you against your father was now being his most prominent advocate.

"Be..because I was a kid." You retort, lost for words.

"See, you can't tell me why you're still angry at him. We're adults, Y/n, let the past be the past." Max sighs, running his fingers through his hair before reaching for you.

You pull away from his reach; hurt and rejection shatter Max's face as he slowly drops his arms. You take a few deep breaths, fiddling with the ring. Max watches, panic overtaking any sense he has.

"Don't, don't do this." He whispers, staring at the ring on your finger.

"How can I marry someone who doesn't respect my wishes, someone who defends the man who called me a slut. The person who made me feel less of myself my entire life, and here the person who is supposed to protect, stand by me, and love me, defends them. How can I marry you after this?" You ask, pulling the ring off.

"No, please, Y/n, don't." Max breaks. He can't keep it together anymore as he watches you sit the ring before him. Tears slide down his face as he watches you grab your shoes and keys.

"Don't leave me, don't please. Not again." He whispers, grabbing you as you try to hide your own tears.

"You betrayed me." You whisper, pulling yourself out of his hold and walking out the door. As you close the door, all you hear is a scream and glass shattering as you walk away from the love of your life.

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scribblesofagoonerr · 2 months

Text

Turmoil of events...

This update might be a bit all over the place. I'm still ill, but I had a spark to write, even if it doesn't make much sense at all.

Credit to @alotofpockets for the idea on this update; I am very grateful for her help!

⟫ part 1

After being sick for five days, it became apparent that having the flu was not enjoyable. You spent most of the week confined to your bed, wrapped in blankets, with a noticeable pile of used tissues beside you. You felt cold one moment and hot the next, shivering uncontrollably.

You had been feeling completely miserable. However, the good news was that you were starting to feel better just in time for the training session ahead of the away game against Bristol.

Although, your team's mothers held differing opinions on the matter.

"Maybe you should take a few more days to recover" Beth suggests, shaking her head. "I still don't think this is a good idea" she adds.

"Why? I feel better now" It's not a complete lie. You do feel better, although you're still slightly sniffling and your head is pounding a little bit too much. Overall, you did feel better than previously.

"I just don't think it's a good idea" Beth says, pursing her lips and turns to look at Viv, seeking her input.

The Dutch shakes her head in agreement and adds, "There's no harm in taking extra time to feel better. You don't want to push yourself and make yourself worse" she tells you.

You try your best to resist the urge to inwardly groan at the two of them, "Seriously? Come on. I'll be fine! I have to get back into the squad-- You know that the nations league games are coming up soon so I need to get minutes" You know that it's important to play; you can't be sidelined instead.

"There'll be plenty of chances for that" Viv tells you with a frown, but she can't help but be concerned about how much you've been pushing yourself.

"I can't be sidelined, I need minutes!" You exclaim before you storm off to finish getting ready for training.

"That kid is..." Beth begins to speak.

"Stubborn" Viv finishes the blondes' sentence.

Beth can't help but chuckle slightly, "Well, that's one word for it now, huh?" she jokes.

"If you're talking about Y/N, then she's definitely stubborn," Laura chips in, amusedly, as she appears in the kitchen. "What happened this time?" she wonders.

"Y/N wants to go to training apparently" Beth exhales a sigh and shakes her head. "It's a bad idea" she states.

"It's definitely a bad idea" Laura replies in agreement with the blonde, she knew how stubborn you could be at times.

"Well, hopefully Jonas will realise that's not ready to be playing in the game yet" Viv tells them as she exhales a sigh.

Apparently, Y/N had done an excellent job of persuading Jonas and the coaching staff that she was fit to play. Therefore, it was not surprising when she secured a spot in the starting eleven for the upcoming game.

This game is significant as Viv is set to return to the pitch, being subbed on during the second half.

"Oh dear" Beth mumbles as she shook her head.

Viv exhales a sigh, "This is not good" she states.

"I'm glad to see that Y/N is feeling better. It'll be good to have her in the starting lineup," Steph says as she looks over to where Kyra and Y/N are joking around on the bus.

"Except that she's not better. We told her she should take more time, but you know what Y/N is like..." Beth remarks.

"Stubborn" Steph pipes in, amusedly.

Beth and Viv both nod in agreement with the woman.

Jen furrows her eyebrows, "You mean she's still sick? I can't see this going well then" she confesses.

"It really isn't going to" Beth exhales a sigh.

"We can't get involved though and decide things for her, or she'd be upset with us for that" Viv states knowingly.

"Yeah, you're right there, Viv" Beth replies in agreement with her girlfriend as she looks over at you, realising that she couldn't say anything and sway the decision or it would backfire on her.

"Cheater!" Y/N shouts aloud, glaring at the australian girl sat opposite her. "Stop cheating!" You protest.

"How am I a cheat? You can't even cheat at Uno!" Kyra delcares with a smug smirk on her face.

"Easy there Y/N, it's just a game now" Laura states, amusedly, although she isn't playing, she's joined all of you on the coach to the game to watch it.

"Nah! Kyra's cheating!" You continue to scowl at the girl while crossing your arms.

"How did I?" Kyra's smug look was starting to annoy you even more.

"You know you did-- You looked at my cards!" You break out into a sudden loud cough as you get worked up, shooting further glares at the 21-year-old.

"You want some water for that cough?" Laura wonders, concerned.

"I'm fine!" You shake your head in protest.

"I thought you said you were better--" Kyra's words are cut off.

"I am, I'm totally fine. It's just a tickle!" You protest, shaking your head as you try and avoid coughing again.

The rest of the girls' don't seem so convinced about it as Kyra and you continue to play uno, under the watchful eye of the rest of the girls.

"Kyra! Stop cheating!" You shout aloud, fed up off the girl constantly cheating with the game and trying to look at your cards.

"Less of the bickering now children" Katie chips in as she laughs, shaking her head from where she sits beside Caitlin.

"There's only one actual child here" You remark, continuing to cross your arms and scowl at the Aussie girl in front of you.

"What's going on?" Alessia wonders, glancing at the two of you confused as she sits in front with Vic.

"Kyra is being a massive cheat!" You exclaim aloud, pointing your finger in the girls' direction accusingly.

"Sure, go and tattle. That's real mature of you kid" Kyra states, smirking cockily.

"Says the 21-year-old whos' acting immature" You remark as the girls all watch you and Kyra bicker amusedly.

"You're being dramatic, Y/N. It's just a game now" Kyra states doing everything in her that she can to wind you up.

"KYRA!" You lunge towards the older girl.

"Y/N!" Kyra shouts back.

"Girls, they're fighting again. Might want to sort that out?" Katie jokes glancing between Beth, Viv and Steph as she watches the two of you almost attempt to wrestle with eachother.

"Kyra, cut it out. Stop winding Y/N up" Steph scolds the younger Aussie girl.

"Kyra, stop winding Y/N up" Steph scolds the younger Aussie girl.

"Y/N you need to calm down, it's just a game. Take it easy" Beth scolds, shaking her head. "Viv, would you talk to her? She'll listen to you" she turns to her girlfriend for help.

"Y/N" Viv scolds you with a knowing firm look

"Sorry" Both you and Kyra apologise after being told off like 2 misbehaved kids, at least you had an excuse that you were an actual kid.

"Handled it like a pro there, girls" Katie jokes with them.

"Well, we've got a few years experience, eh?" Beth remarks to the Irish women.

"It's like I'm permanently babystting" Steph huffs and rolls her eyes. "Caitlin, it's your turn next!" she insists to the fellow Aussie, while the rest of the girls just laugh.

At first the warm-up is going successful, you run with the rest of the girls to warm up and try and obtain the energy needed, you're feeling good and motivated about the game.

It's going well until it's not...

You can't help but wobble slightly as there's a light pounding in the back of your head, you just put it down to dehydration instead rather than the after-effects of illness instead.

"You alright, Y/N?" Lia notices you stumble slightly and frowns.

"I... I'm good" You're crouching over slightly as you feel out of breath but you try and play it off like its' nothing instead.

"You're sure?" Lia checks in as she's not too keen to give up on the conversation yet.

"Oh yeah I'm great, I'm totally fine" You insist as you try and push off the terrible feeling that you felt looming; You couldn't afford to miss this game due to illness.

"Y/N..." Lia still doesn't look totally convinced, but she knows better than to try and push you.

"I'm fine, really Lia... Uh huh, yep I'm cool" You nod and quickly run off in the opposite direction to avoid any further questions and concerns.

"Okay, kid. This is it, your time to shine!" Katie's enthusiastic voice comes from behind you in the lineup. "Are you ready for this?" she asks.

You were reluctant to acknowledge that your headache was intensifying. The throbbing sensation in your temple caused you to tightly shut your eyes, and the noise emanating from the crowd only made it worse.

It's worth mentioning that your throat feels somewhat scratchy again. However, you have to play in this game, so you pretend it's nothing and that you're fine.

"I was born ready, let's go!" You cheer and try to be like your usual upbeat self, but never mind how terrible you still feel.

"Let's go girls!" Kim exclaims, leading the team onto the pitch alongside the Bristol team.

As you walk out to the pitch with the rest of your team, you try to keep up the facade of looking happy. You attempt to block out the pounding feeling in your temple, knowing that you only have to make it through 90 minutes before you can finally flop down and fall asleep once again.

As soon as the whistle blows and the game starts, you get your first touch on the ball and begin racing all over the pitch. Despite fighting off the flu, you don't give Bristol a chance to gain possession of the ball.

It all happened too quickly for you to realise what is happening at that moment. The team is 2-1 ahead of Bristol when everything went wrong.

You went to intercept the ball, a simple move that you had done plenty of times. Suddenly, as you got your toe on the ball, ready to pass it in the direction of Alessia, you felt a sudden pop in your knee, followed by a sharp pain that felt excruciating.

"Agh!" You scream as you fall down onto the pitch in agony.

"Y/N!" Beth is the first to crouch beside you, concern spread across her face. "What's happened?" she questions, worriedly.

The sound of the whistle echoes through the stadium as the girls rush to your side to check on you; the noise is suddenly silent as the crowd of fans watches on in despair as Arsenal's wonder kid falls down on the pitch.

"What hurts-- What's happened?" Katie asks, concerningly as she joins you on the other side.

The tears well up in your eyes as you clutch your knee to stop the pain, "My knee... It's my knee!" You exclaim, letting out a sound of whimpering. "I heard it... I heard the pop!" You add.

"It's okay, Y/N. Don't panic; everything is going to be fine" Viv says as she quickly comes to your side. She had been subbed on to replace Alessia, but you couldn't help but feel awful. This was supposed to be Viv's comeback, her return to the pitch after her ACL injury, and instead, you selfishly took the spotlight away from her.

You could see the girls exchanging looks as they signalled for medics. It's at that moment that you realise you have made a grave mistake. Even though nobody spoke, it was clear that the situation was not good.

#woso x reader #arsenal x reader #woso #wosos fanfics #beth mead x reader #vivianne miedema x reader #meadema x reader #woso imagine #woso one shot #awfc x reader #engwnt x reader #woso fic

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sunrizef1 · 8 hours

Text

Guilty as sin?

Pairing: Max Verstappen x reader | (side) Lando Norris x reader

Warnings: Emotional cheating

Word count: 1.8k

Authors note: hate this kinda idk | Not proofread | I also do not condone cheating, this is just based on a Taylor swift song do not come for me

———————————————————

A text lights up your phone, illuminating the dark of your hotel room with the shine of a text message. You glance down at your sleeping boyfriend beside you, checking to see if he’s still deeply asleep before picking up your phone and sliding it open.

Max <3

The Downtown Lights - The Blue Nile

*Spotify link attached*

You sigh, closing your phone and setting it back onto your nightstand, eyes shutting tightly. You glance back over to Lando, asleep beside you, willing him to suddenly be a shittier person so you could feel less guilty about this.

Not that you and Max had done anything. You hadn’t. But it didn’t stop you from daydreaming about the Red Bull driver. It hadn’t stopped him either, apparently. You had heard the song, of course you had. Max sending it only confirmed that the less than platonic feelings between you were, in fact, reciprocated.

Just as you’re about to roll over and return to the sleep that had been evading you for more than a few hours, your phone lights up once again.

Max <3

I know you saw that

Come up to the roof

See you there

You roll your eyes at the texts, arrogance bleeding through every letter. Although, despite your holier than thou attitude, you do slide out of the bed, reaching down to a slide on a pair of slippers, praying the bed won’t creak as you stand up. Your feet pad quietly across the carpet of the hotel room, steps muffled by the fluff in your shoes.

You turn your phone to face the room, hoping it’s enough light to illuminate your way out. You step around your suitcase in the middle of the floor, cursing quietly as your foot catches on the zipper slightly. You catch yourself though, quickly grasping your key card and exiting the room.

Once you’re in the hallway, you let out a deep sigh, face relaxing under the fluorescent lights. You bit your lip, debating how worth it this tryst would be. You were fairly certain you were both into each other. All this meeting would be was another interaction where you both ignore your feelings and you have to lock the hints he was dropping away in a vault to never be considered again.

Even after considering the cons, you push yourself away from the wall, walking toward the stairs. You were already on the top floor so all you had between you and Max was a single set of stairs. You run a hand through your hair, hoping you don’t have a bad case of bedhead. Not that you had gotten enough sleep to mess your hair up at all anyway.

You slide the door open and set foot upon the stairs, trying not to wobble too much. Every step feels like it takes twenty minutes, every one leading to an unknown fate at the top. Your footsteps echo around the dark hall, sound bouncing off the concrete walls.

When you get to the top, you push the door open gently, cold air rushing to hit you as you step out. The door shuts closed behind you with a slam and you’re suddenly not sure if you’ll be able to get it open again. But it wasn’t really the time to care about that as your eyes lock on a familiar Dutch man sat on the edge of the roof.

Your feet patter gently against the roof, each step feeling quieter than the last. You take your time in approaching him, his head not even having turned your way since you set foot upon the place he had invited you. Not that you wanted him to turn around. You were worried that locking eyes with him would make you run away, or worse, make you more inclined to stay. So you just walk quietly to the edge, carefully swinging your legs over the side to sit a few feet away from him.

You’re not too worried about falling. There’s another edge just a few yards below you, no doubt there to stop rich drunk people from taking a nosedive off the roof during a party or after a wild night.

Cold air slides across your unusually warm face, heated with the reality of the situation. It’s not windy though, which is nice. Instead it’s just a nice chill, cold seeping through your thin sleep shirt and into your skin.

“I knew you’d come,” Max’s voice breaks the tranquility of the moment, cutting through the air with a familiar arrogant tilt.

You fight the urge to roll your eyes, instead opting to hum lightly, eyes still locked onto the cityscape below you. You’d always loved Las Vegas. The city was always bursting with life and it was just so pretty to look at. Especially from above. It has shocked you when you’d walked out and the roof was empty. You’d’ve thought there’d be an abundance of people considering how little the city sleeps to begin with. You were honestly surprised Lando had chosen to stay asleep in your hotel room instead of stay out partying. Maybe when you’d told him it’d be better for him to get some sleep for once, he’d actually listened.

Maybe you should’ve listened to your own advice. You should’ve stayed asleep and completely avoided Max. Maybe then you wouldn’t feel like spewing your guts out on the many drunkards below.

“Not going to say anything, then?” Max laughs and you can feel his gaze on the side of your face. You fight the strong urge to lock eyes with him, “You don’t get to act like I’m the one coercing you here. You also chose to come up here.”

He’s right, of course. But you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing you wanted him just as much as he wanted you.

“Do you even like him?” Max questions and you can feel your stomach drop. You’d been thinking about that exact question for months now and you honestly were dreading the answer. You finally look away from the buildings in front of you to take a quick glance toward Max, his eyes already trained on yours.

You sigh, warm breath clouding in the cold night air, “I don’t know.”

Max makes a face at your words, shaking his head, “What do you mean you don’t know? How can you not know if you like your boyfriend?”

You roll your eyes, looking away from him again, arms crossing across your torso tightly, “I mean I don’t know, Max. I know the answer you want, trust me, I do. If it helps, I don’t love him. Not anymore, at least.”

“Yeah, no shit. I knew that. I’m asking if you like him,” Max scoffs, shifting closer to you. You roll your eyes again, finally giving in and turning your body toward his.

“He’s a fine person, Max. It just feels like neither of us even want this relationship anymore.”

“Then why are you still dating him?”

That makes you stop dead, letting out a shaky breath as you accept that you’d finally have to open up to the man next to you, “We’ve been together so long, I’ve tried so hard to make it work. I thought we were going to get married, honestly.”

You glance nervously over to Max, expecting to see an angry look on his face. Instead you’re met with one of understanding which shocks you back into speaking again, “I would’ve said yes if he’d asked.”

Max hums, discreetly shifting a bit closer as he turns to stare out at the city below you. You wait for his response with bated breath, praying he doesn’t hate you for basically leading him on.

“But he didn’t ask.”

“Yeah,” you nod, face filled with remorse for your relationship, “He didn’t.”

Max hums again, glancing above the two of you at the shining lights casting a soft glow upon the pair of you. Music begins to play softly from somewhere down below you. When you glance over the edge, you’re met with a street band preforming a nice ballad, swaying along to their melodies. When Max stands up, you think he’s going to leave you entirely but your eyebrows shoot up when he holds out a hand instead.

“Come on,” He says and you can feel your heart flutter as you catch the soft smile on his face. Something that hadn’t happened with Lando in a long while.

You grasp you hand in his, feeling the warmth of his larger hands spread into your chilly ones. He pulls you up gently, although maybe adding a bit too much strength as you fall flush against his chest. You laugh and stumble back a bit, hands still clutching his. He pulls you into a sway, gliding along to the melodic notes that float up from down below. You sit and take in the quiet moment for a little while, eventually moving your head to rest against his chest. The silence is broken when you glance up and see Max already looking down at you.

“I’m not gonna cheat on Lando,” you mumble, eyes softening as you stare up, “He doesn’t deserve that.”

If Max disagrees, he keeps it to himself well enough, choosing to nod instead, “I wouldn’t expect you to.”

You hum, placing your head back on his chest, “I do think about you though.”

Max tilts his head and his eyebrows furrow as the words leave your mouth. When you catch his expression, you feel the need to explain, “Just in life. Everything I do, I think about you doing it with me. I don’t know, just accept the compliment that I think about you when you’re not around, please.”

You can feel Max’ laugh rumble through his chest and you glance up to see his head titled back and his eyes closed as he chuckles softly before glancing back at you, smile still painting his face, “I can live with that. For now.”

You take a page out of his book and just hum in response, eyes falling closed as you, once again, lean against him. The two of you sway to the music for a while, only stopping when it does as well. You find yourself praying it never does so you never have to return to your reality where your boyfriend of six years has refused to put a ring on it so you went to one of his friends for emotional comfort and ended up falling in love with him. But the music does stop and you do return to that reality, feet padding softly down the hotel stairs.

You slide your keycard in the door, wincing at the sound it makes as it accepts it. You support the door as it closes, toeing off your shoes and tossing the keycard on your nightstand. You plug your phone into the charger, glancing down at the new texts on your home screen before sliding them away and rolling over to, hopefully, find sleep in a sleepless night.

Max <3

I'll wait for you btw

I knew about him

But now I know about you

If he kills me it'd be a wonderful way to die

For you

I'd wait forever, darling

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Tags: @casperlikej @evie-119

#scheduled #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 x female reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x you #f1 smau #max verstappen x you #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen x female reader #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen fluff #lando norris x female reader #lando norris x you #lando norris x reader #lando norris x y/n

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pitchsidestories · 3 months

Text

Don’t Be So Hard on Yourself II Laia Codina x Reader

masterlist I word count: 2161

A/N: based of this request. Let us know what you think.

Like every week, Jonas Eidevall announced his starting line up for the upcoming game a few days before the weekend. And like most weeks, Laia Codina was not in it. Usually she would accept this with a brave face but this time, she left the room right after the announcement. Shocked, you watched your girlfriend go; “Laia…“

You were about to get up as well but Jen Beattie held you back from following her; “Let her.“ “It’s really not easy for her, Jen.“, you explained helplessly. The rest of the Arsenal players had already fallen back into their usual routine of small talk. The Scot nodded empathetically; “It’s never easy to sit on the bench.“ “Very true.“, Lia Wälti agreed.

“Leave her alone for a moment.“, Jen instructed you gently. “Right… I don’t want to annoy her.“, you nodded slowly. “She always puts on a brave face and supports the other players. I know she expected something else when she moved her.“, the Scot continued.

“Especially coming from the World Cup as a Champions… it’s tough.“, you added. You and Laia had talked about it a lot recently. “We all understand that, trust me.“, Jen smiled softly.

Victoria Pelova chimed in; “Yes, we get that.“ “Thanks girls.“, you forced yourself to smile at your team mates. Kim Little who sat next to Jen got up; “I’ll go look after her.“ You thanked your captain with a grateful nod.

Laia sat on the steps outside. She looked up in surprise as Kim approached her; “Kim hi.“ “Are you okay?“, the captain asked, sitting down beside her. “Yes, I’m good.“, the Spanish defender replied, no very convincingly.

But she could not fool her captain. “It’s tough, right?“ “A bit.“, Laia finally admitted, her gaze directed down at her toes. With confidence, Kim replied; “You’ll get your time. Trust me.“ “Are you sure about this?“ Laias voice was filled with insecurity. The captain nodded; “I am. I see how hard you work.“ “That’s what she says too…“, the defender said.

When she looked up, she caught Kim smiling briefly; “Maybe she’s got a point.“ “Yes, but you know as my girlfriend she needs to say stuff like this.“, Laia returned the smile. Kim raised her eyebrows at her team mate; “Yes, but as your captain I’m saying that stuff because it’s true.“

“Appreciate it.“, Laia laughed lightly. Kim bumped her elbow against Laias; “Are you ready to go back inside?“ “I am.“, she confirmed while getting up and pulling the Scot up with her. “Let’s go then. We still need you for the game.“

Meanwhile Steph Catly was putting an arm around your shoulder:” And you stop feeling bad because you’re in the starting line and she isn’t.” “I don’t.”, you muttered. Slowly Beth Mead shook her head:” Yeah, you’re.”

“Maybe a little bit.”, you admitted blushing. Laughing Katie McCabe padded your back and suggested:” Don’t. Don’t blame yourself, blame Jonas.” “Katie.”, Vivianne Miedema rolled her eyes at her friend. Cheekily the Irish player threw her hands up:” What? As long as it works, and she feels better.” “I can confirm it helps.”, you told her with a crooked smile on your lips.

Triumphantly Katie turned around to the Dutch forward:” See!” “Girls, do you want to grab a coffee and we get Myle?”, Vivianne changed the topic quickly to something more light-hearted.

With that said the owner of Win brought in the puppy she and her girlfriend got which made Beth squeal out loud in delight:”Myle!” “Hello little one.”, you whispered in awe, cuddling the little dog when he approached you and started licking your face. Happily, the blonde dog mum declared: “He says hi too.”

“Such a good boy. Laia, can we get one too?”, you asked your girlfriend as she was re-entering the room. Quickly Victoria responded, pouting:”No, I’ll get a dog before that.”

“I didn’t know we couldn’t get one if you get one.”, the Spanish defender answered entertained by her reaction. Trying to calm down your teammate you offered her:” Vicky, we could look together at dogs, what do you think about that.” “No, thanks.”, she waved it off.

Motivated Vivianne clapped into her hands:” Let’s go to the coffeeshop, shall we?” “Please, Myle needs a puppycino.”, her girlfriend nodded excited. “And I need a human cappuccino before we cook later with Aitana and Keira via facetime.”, you added grinning.

Innocently Alessia was looking at the brunette:” Sounds delicious, Laia are we invited too?” “For the cooking or the dinner?”, Laia wanted to know.

The face of the English player turned slightly pink:” Actually, more for the dinner.” “I knew you’d say that.”, your girlfriend replied smiling. Cheekily Victoria asked her:” Does this mean we can come later?” “Fine.”, Laia sighed in defeat. But you knew she loved having her new teammates over for dinner.

After you had your little coffee catch up with the Arsenal girls you two started cooking in your new appartement. Amused Aitana looked at you both through your phone screen:” So you want to get a puppy? I need to tell that Mapi, she will love it. Remember she always said you’re the epitome of puppy love when we were younger!”

“Oh, stop it. We’ll never hear the end of it.”, Laia begged the Spanish midfielder giggling.Laughing, you agreed; “Yeah, please. We want to visit Barcelona in peace.“

Keiras face lightened up in surprise and she shared a look with Aitana; “You’re going to visit?“ “Soon, yes.“, you replied. “Can’t wait.“, Aitana smiled happily into the phone camera. “We neither.“, Laia answered while watching Keira stirred their food with a wrinkled nose.

“We need to cook faster. I’m starving.“, she complained. With a gaze to your kitchen clock, you agreed; “Oh yeah, we should hurry up.

The Arsenal girls will be here soon.“ “You invited your team to our BFF night?“, Keira asked, more amused than offended. Laia shrugged in response; “You know how Alessia can do puppy eyes, right? We had no chance.“

“Rude.“, the English midfielder laughed lightly. Her midfield partner at Barcelona agreed; “Honestly, we’re your friends too!“ “We know that.“, Laia rolled her eyes with fondness. “That’s why we’ll see you again soon.“, you added.

“Maybe.“, Laia followed up. Keira repeated; “Maybe?“ “Yeah?“ Before they could start a discussion about your vacation to Barcelona, you changed the topic; “Aitana, how’s your dinner looking?“

“Delicious. Here, look.“ The phone was lifted and the camera flipped so you could see their delicious looking Spanish dish. “Looks amazing.“, you commented.

With a small smile, Keira challenged you; “Bet yours doesn’t look as good.“ You had to suppress a smile, thinking back about how shy and awkward Keira was when had first met her.

Laia in the meantime took her phone to show your friends the large simmering pot that sat on your stove: “Lies. Look at that beauty.“ “That’s a whole lot of food.“, Keira stated, seemingly impressed. “Well, a lot of girls want to join dinner and they’re footballers so that means they’ll be hungry.“, you explained, carefully tasting the hot food. “I see.“

As soon as you were done cooking, Keira and Aitana ended the video call to enjoy their dinner in Barcelona while you in London hosted your team mates. As always when you spent time with them, the evening was filled with laughter and good cheer. You didn’t even notice how quickly time had passed until all your guests had left.

It was around midnight when Laia and you started doing the dishes. “They couldn’t get enough of that dinner, Laia.“, you stated contently. Still elated from the dinner, your girlfriend smiled; “I’ll tell Aitana and Keira that they loved their recipe.“ “You should.“

“They’ll be happy.“, Laia concluded with a laugh. You both silently focused on cleaning for a moment but a thought still whirred in your brain; “Laia, are you happy here?“ The defender paused, wiping her hands on a tea towel before answering; “I am… Why?“

You shrugged; “I was just thinking about your reaction earlier when Jonas made it clear that you’re not in the starting line up… I was worried you might regret joining me at Arsenal.“ “I don’t regret it.“, Laia replied quickly. You could see that there was more going on so you prompted her to continue; “But?“

“I was expecting to get more game time after the World cup.”, the brunette explained, her voice couldn’t conceal her disappointment. Softly you promised her: “Trust me, your time to shine will come.” “Hopefully.”, she whispered, her shoulders shrinking.

Saddened by her body language you pulled her into a hug:” Laia, don’t be so hard on yourself.” “I’ll just try to become better.”, Laia told you with a weak smile on her lips. More hopeful the defender added:” I feel like I can do it.” “I know you can.”, you tried to cheer her up.

Gratefully she pressed a kiss on your forehead, mumbling against your skin:” Thanks love.” “You’re welcome.”, you replied sincerely. The Spanish woman decided after your embrace:” Let’s go to bed. Tomorrow is training.” You swiftly followed her to your bedroom; the promise of better days was in the air.

It seemed like the effort Laia put into her training paid off because Jonas put her up in the starting line against Reading at the end of January. On match day Vivianne hummed:” Look at you, you’re so proud of your girlfriend.”

“Oh, shut up, Viv.”, you playfully elbowed her. The Dutch forward kept teasing you: “What? It’s true.” “Yes, okay, you’re right, I’m really happy for her.”, you admitted proudly grinning into your girlfriend’s direction who was just getting ready for the match in your team’s locker room.

Amused Vivianne looked at you:” Told you.” “So cute.”, Beth tuned in with an equally wide smile. Your teammates making you groan out loud: “Not you too.” “What?”, the English blonde answered innocently.

Meanwhile Jonas announced cheerfully: “Girl’s time to go off on that pitch and play.” “Thank god.”, you muttered relieved before turning to Laia, whispering into her ear, good luck, love.” The defender kissed your cheek: “Thank you, mi amor.”

In the second half the Spanish player did score, Victoria exclaimed happily:” Nice goal, Laia!” “Thanks.”, Laia answered blushing. Beaming Jen Beattie padded her shoulders:” Welcome to the Arsenal.” “Thanks.”, she chuckled.

Eyerolling the Dutch midfielder turned to the Scottish player:” She’s been here for half a year, Jen!” “She didn’t score yet though.”, Jen defended herself. Curious Laia glanced at the older woman:” Is that the moment when you become a real gooner?” “Yes.”, the Scottish player nodded delighted.

For a moment you embraced her: “Congrats.” “Thank you.”, your girlfriend said, cheeks turning redder after your hug. Clearing her throat Beth reminded you all:” We got to go back to work, girls.” “Exactly.”, Kim agreed.

After the match you and Leah walked into the locker room together:” Lee, your assist was great.” “Thanks. Feels good to be back.”, the blonde confessed smiling.

Like every professional player you knew what a big moment it was so you added: “I can imagine.” “It was perfect.”, Beths eyes sparkled fondly while thinking of her goal. Teasing you glanced at her:” Yeah, pretty decent goal, Beffy.” “Decent?!”, the goal scorer repeated playfully hurt.

Jen interrupted you, a guitar in hand. “Guys, listen.“, she called, playing the first chords. Kim gave her an unimpressed look; “What are you doing?“ “It’s something we worked on, right Jen?“, Leah responded, sitting down next to Jen and started singing. Rolling her eyes, Kim shook her head about her team mates while Laia held her hand out towards you.

You took it and let her pull you in to slow dance to the song. Smiling, you looked at each other until Katie shouted; “Disgusting cute couple!“ “I agree.“, Kim mumbled. “Oh, you two let them breathe.“, Caitlin rolled her eyes. Jen nodded: “Yeah, let them have fun.“

Laughing, Caitlin slapped Katie on her upper arm; “Also you could just ask me to dance with you, Katie.“ The Irish player grimaced immediately; “Ew, no.“ “Ignore them, Laia.“, you smiled, your eyes locked with hers. “But…“, she started. “Hm?“ “Doesn’t matter.“ “Okay.“ “Let’s enjoy this.“, Laia stated, continuing to sway with her hands on your hips. “Alright.“, you nodded.

She let her forehead rest against yours; “That was a great game.“ “Agreed.“, you smiled, genuinely happy for your girlfriend. “It feels like the hard work finally paid off.“ Carefully, you caressed her cheek with one hand; “You definitely deserved it.“ “Thank you.“ Jens voice snapped you two out of your moment; “Girls? Everyone left already.“

You hadn’t even realized that the music had stopped playing. “We’re coming.“, you called as Jen left the dressing room as well. Laia took her football bag; “Yes, on our way.“ On your way out, you took your girlfriends hand and pressed a quick kiss to her lips; “Certainly a day to remember.“

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giveamadeuschohisownmovie · 2 months

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If you combine the RDR2 epilogue with RDR1, while the series is still about John Marston’s redemption, the epilogue expands the scope by asking the question, “Can John put away his guns for good?”

Because the RDR2 epilogue was all about how John just couldn’t get away from gunfights. Although you can argue that he was pushed into those fights with the Laramies, you can also see Abigail’s perspective in that the fights were putting their family at risk. So, when Abigail leaves, John is forced to really consider if he can put the guns away for good. If he can actually pull off being a rancher. To his credit, he does try.

He gets the bank loan, he builds the house with Uncle and Charles, and he learns how to properly manage the property. Because of his efforts, Abigail and Jack come back. But even so, John just can’t put the guns away because he’s driven by revenge against Micah Bell. Although he gets his payback, he’s punished for it by Edgar Ross tracking him down. Ironically, karma bit both Micah and John here.

So, RDR1 continues the question of whether John can put the guns away for good. It’s here where he’s almost reached that point. But now, he’s being tested on whether he’ll be tempted back into a life of an outlaw, back into a life involving violence and danger. Despite everything that’s thrown his way, John continues his path of redemption/putting his guns away for good:

1) He’s put into the role of a lawman and is pitted against Bill’s gang, essentially forcing him to be on the other side of the outlaws’ violence against others. It’s through this that John swears off from the outlaw life for good, especially when he sees just how awful Bonnie MacFarlane and her family were treated.

2) Javier tries to use nostalgia of the “good ole days” to win John over. It doesn’t work since John doesn’t want the good ole days, especially since he has a bright future with Abigail and Jack. The Mexico arc was, in general, about torn loyalties. John was playing both sides of the war and Javier tried to sway John based on their past friendship. Despite this, John stays true to his convictions. He doesn’t want the life of an outlaw anymore, nor does he want to keep shooting people anymore (he even says he’s getting tired of pulling the trigger!), so he rejects the nostalgia of the old gang.

3) Dutch challenged John over his desire to change. Dutch believed change was impossible and that John would “always” be a gunslinger. He can’t be a rancher, it’s just not what nature intended. John, once again, sticks to his convictions. In fact, despite all of his anger towards Dutch, he refused to shoot him. John can shoot Bill and Javier, but it’s Dutch who he refuses to shoot. When I first played this, I thought it was his fondness over Dutch as his former leader. Now, I’m wondering if it’s also John trying to prove his point. That he CAN change, that he CAN put the guns away. So he does, even when he had Dutch cornered.

Then came the final challenge. Jack Marston brings up the topic of “the day John Marston stopped shooting”. What will it take? John finally does, but in more than one way. Obviously, he puts the guns away since he dies. But John could’ve easily escaped. We’ve done it as the player multiple times. But if he did, it would be a return to a life on the run, a life where Abigail and Jack would always be in danger. The same life that made Abigail take Jack and leave John in the RDR2 epilogue. Everything he’s worked for, all the progress he made in changing his life would be ruined.

So, John makes the hard choice. He sacrifices himself to ensure his family would be safe. He refuses to return to the outlaw life, to a life where he has to shoot at people, even if it means his death. And what is the last thing John does?

He throws away his gun.

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katelynnwrites · 9 months

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Think I Forgot How To Be Happy, Something I’m Not (But Something I Can Be) | Felicitas Rauch

warnings: reader’s prior messy break up

word count: 3642

summary: you leave north london broken but maybe in germany, you’ll meet someone who helps you to heal, part two can be found here

a/n: requested, some fluff for my fellow germany fans. also my brain kinda went off on it’s own tangent here so this is what it is 🥺😂

Germany is not somewhere you thought you would ever live in. Yet here you are, in your new and empty apartment, having signed for Wolfsburg.

Arsenal had been your home for as long as you could remember and you had never planned on leaving your childhood club.

You were happy there. Until you made the stupid decision to date a teammate.

That’s where it had all gone wrong for you.

The way your relationship had ended, you wouldn’t wish that on anyone. The initial dismissal and pulling away by your ex had left you with trust issues.

The inevitable break up led to you falling out of love with North London. All the little corners and places in the city that you had once loved so much and therefore shared with your ex were now tainted with painful, sour memories.

So encouraged by your Arsenal teammates who have had a front row seat to the way your relationship had fallen apart, you had left the only home you had ever known for Wolfsburg.

******

You arrive in Wolfsburg to Jill’s open arms, the former Arsenal player having been instructed to look out for you.

She picks you up at the airport and brings you to the apartment where you would be staying.

The Dutch woman offers to stay and help you unpack but you give her a small smile and tell her you would be fine on your own.

You don’t want to say it but you need a moment alone, to process this enormous decision that you had made.

Jill understands and leaves but promises to be back so that you can carpool with her to your first training session with the German club.

Alone in your apartment, surrounded by cardboard boxes, you sigh and sit down to think.

******

Jill introduces you to your new teammates. They’re all welcoming, friendly and nice, excited to meet their new English teammate.

You’d remember a few of them, from international friendlies.

Lena Oberdorf especially because she had almost taken your ankle out with a solid tackle.

She rushes to greet you first, saying she is so glad to meet you and worrying if you hold any hard feelings towards her.

You didn’t and you tell her as much, giving her a warm smile.

Svenja Huth is next, taking her duties as captain very seriously and wanting to make sure you are fitting in okay.

The following faces you meet kind of blur together, unfamiliar German accents being the only thing you catch.

Until a brunette steps forward, meaning to introduce herself only for a blonde to interrupt her loudly, ‘I’m Jule and this is Felicitas.’

‘Don’t call me that.’ She mumbles, making Jule giggle.

‘Ignore her please. I’m Feli and it’s really nice to meet you.’

You laugh and shake her hand.

Feli smiles and you give her one in return.

******

As lovely as your new teammates are, you’re still not letting them in and keeping your guard up.

It bothers them, when you make excuses to miss team meals and leave team bondings early.

You play well with them on the field, connecting easily and creating goal scoring opportunities. Your talent is not something that was ever in doubt but now it shines through. The German style of play suits you.

But your distance concerns them enough that they ask Jill, the only one who you seem willing to open up to about why you seem so closed off and sad.

Jill tells them about your messy break up and how much it had hurt you.

She doesn’t share enough to violate your privacy but what she said had been enough.

Your Wolfsburg teammates are kinder to you after that, patiently waiting for you to let them in.

Especially Feli who is particularly enamored with you. With your English accent and smile.

The German has been trying to keep her growing feelings for you under wraps but it’s been getting harder for her to do so.

She loves spending time with you, adores the way your eyes light up when you find something funny.

When she finds out you’re a dog person, she brings her dog to training.

Feli watches as you laugh, letting her poodle lick your hand. Her heart skips a beat when you look up at her, a big grin on your face.

The sound of your laughter gives her a warm feeling inside, so much so that she’s smiling like a fool.

Jill leans against the wall with her and quietly says, ‘Well done. This is the most relaxed I’ve ever seen her since she got here.’

‘I just want her to be happy.’ Feli murmurs, shrugging lightly.

In that moment, Jill realises exactly how smitten her teammate is.

******

You weren’t blind. You know that your teammates know what is up with you.

But slowly and surely, their patience and kindness begins to pay off.

Feli is a big part of that.

The German player had caught onto how much you love her dog and had repeatedly invited you to a park not far from the training grounds.

At first you had made your usual excuses but Felicitas had been gentle but persistent in her asking, so much so that you had acquiescenced.

In the time you spend with Feli and Cinnamon, you get to know them both.

Cinnamon loves getting the spot behind her ears scratched and Feli loves her coffee.

As you grow more and more familiar with a certain German, you find yourself developing feelings for her.

Eventually it gets to the point where you wake up one morning, on an off day and catch yourself excitedly getting ready to see her at the park.

You don’t go that day.

You ignore all her subsequent texts and calls.

They are anxious and worried at first but soon get even more frantic.

You hide under your blankets and keep your phone far away from you.

So great is the pain in your heart and so heavy are the thoughts in your head that you forget that you gave Jill a spare key when you moved in.

The depth of Feli’s feelings for you are not to be underestimated because soon enough, she’s there with Jill.

Jill who takes one look at you in your room and quietly sits down beside you on the bed, where you’re curled up.

‘Schat, I know that you’re scared of what you might feel for Feli but for what it’s worth, I believe that she couldn’t be more different than your ex.’

The Dutch woman waits a moment and upon not getting any response, sighs.

‘She was so worried you know. Feli practically begged me to come here and check on you.’

‘Was she?’ You softly ask, tearing up slightly as Jill talks about the German woman who has found her way in your heart despite your best efforts to keep her out.

‘She still is. I couldn’t convince her to go back to her apartment so she’s here. I managed to get her to wait in your living room till I spoke with you.’

‘She’s here?’

You panic and stand up, rushing to pull your bedroom door open.

Felicitas freezes, she’d been pacing you think.

Cinnamon barks happily and runs up to you. The brown poodle gets an absentminded pet from you before you straighten back up.

You keep staring at Feli and barely notice Jill leaving the apartment after saying that she’d give the two of you a moment.

‘Hi.’ Feli softly says.

‘Felicitas.’

‘You’re the only one who I don’t mind calling me that you know? Well, other than my parents.’ The brunette gives a tiny laugh before she takes a step towards you.

‘You mean a lot to me. The way I feel about you isn’t a secret.’

The sharp inhale that escapes you is loud. You didn’t know that your feelings were returned and the anxiety her confession causes must be clear on your face.

Feli’s eyes widen and she quickly says, ‘I know someone hurt you badly and I want you to know that I would never do that. I really care for you and I'd just like you to know that if you ever want to let me in, I'll be here. You don’t have to feel the way I feel but I'm here. I'm always going to be here for you. I'm not going anywhere, I promise.’

‘You promise?’

The way your voice wavers makes your unsurety apparent.

It’s why Feli doesn’t hesitate to answer with certainty, ‘I promise.’

You stay silent, trying to see if she really means it.

After a moment, you decide she does. You trust that she does.

‘Okay. D-Do you still want to go to our park now?’

It’s a tiny nervous step from you but a step nonetheless.

‘Of course.’ Feli is quick to agree, a wide smile on her face.

The fact that you had referred to the park as yours and hers, gives her butterflies in her stomach.

******

You join your teammates for lunch.

If Feli had to bring Cinnamon and sit beside you for the whole meal, she didn’t care.

Neither did your teammates who are over the moon that you are finally comfortable enough to start letting them in.

They don’t explicitly say anything to you but the way they grin and hug you, shows you that they care.

The meal is lighthearted and fun, situated at a pet friendly restaurant, to accomodate Cinnamon.

By the end of it, you have decided that getting to know your teammates outside of training wouldn’t be so bad.

Especially if Feli was going to hold your hand every time she thought you were anxious.

******

You begin going over to Feli’s apartment.

She convinced you to come over one day, after playing fetch with Cinnamon, saying that she’d like to introduce you to proper homemade German food.

You’d hesitated but she had looked at you so pleadingly you could not say no.

So you said yes.

And that is how the twice a week dinners started because the food that Felicitas makes is just so good.

You might even say that it makes you fall a little harder for her.

Feli tries to teach you how to cook but it doesn’t really work out. It’s almost laughable really, how hard the both of you try, you to cook and her to teach you.

Eventually the two of you just resign yourselves to the fact that it wouldn’t work and settle into a new routine.

One where you go shopping for groceries together and cook together in Feli’s apartment.

A routine where you insist on paying for the groceries since she cooks and where you sit on the counter, sneaking pieces of food to Cinny as you watch her cook.

******

As the months pass by in Germany, you make sure to keep in contact with your old Arsenal teammates.

Your English teammates you still see at camp but you miss your other teammates.

Especially Lia who you have always been particularly close to.

Lia who you call one night, to have her answer your video call with a knowing smile.

‘Lia?’ You nervously question.

‘You’re falling in love.’

��What? Lia no.’

‘I was watching the game today. I saw you run to a certain Felicitas Rauch as soon as she went down. You were the first one by her side.’

‘I care a lot about all my teammates. I’d do the same for you.’

Lia doesn’t just laugh, she giggles.

‘Yes but you wouldn’t be smoothing sweaty hair off my face or helping me sit up. Or holding my hand as you walk me back to my position.’

You frown, remembering the moment from earlier.

Feli had been tackled and had gone down holding her ankle. She had not got back up, so you had sprinted right over.

Upon hearing her pained gasps, you had immediately tried to soothe her pain as best as you could.

It hadn’t occurred to you that it would be broadcasted on live television.

You had just been so focused on Feli and the fact that she had been hurting. Everything else was unimportant then.

The way Felicitas had gratefully held your hand as the medics checked out her ankle, it assured you that you had made the right decision.

Lia’s new fit of giggles brings you out of your thoughts.

‘I’d hold your hand and walk you back to your position if you wanted.’ You grumble.

The Swiss woman laughs once more before looking at you seriously.

‘I’m so glad you’re healing. It wasn’t easy to see how broken you were before.’

‘Feli’s been…’

You trail off, not knowing how to explain exactly how kind, patient and warm the defender has been to you.

Lia nods, ‘I know Feli and I know you. I also know that you’ll be good for each other.’

‘I don’t know Lia. I’m just so scared. Feli means so much to me and she’s been incredibly sweet but there’s always the chance that this all goes wrong. I love Germany and I feel at home here now. I don’t want to lose that again.’

Your former teammate nods once more, understanding your fears.

But then she asks something you should have asked yourself a long time ago.

‘Why does Germany feel like home?’

The answer is one you know deep down. Germany only feels like home because of Felicitas.

******

You curl into Feli’s body, your palm resting on her stomach.

She shifts, allowing you to get more comfortable.

‘Thanks.’ You whisper, so as to not disturb the rest of your teammates during the movie screening and she presses a kiss onto your hair in response.

You don’t stop her when she presses a second and then a third affectionately.

If anything, you relax even further into her.

With her so close, you can hear and feel the way her breath stutters every time the movie picks up.

It seems that Feli scares easily and you find that adorable.

******

Twice a week dinners at Feli’s apartment become a nightly occurrence.

One evening when it’s her turn to host team bonding, you answer the door.

Jill smirks.

You roll your eyes.

She catches you alone, in Feli’s kitchen later on.

‘Whatever you two are, it’s not just friends.’

‘I know.’ You say softly and despite Jill’s excited follow up and slightly invasive questions, you don’t say anything else.

******

Despite how close you and Feli are, she’s not your bus buddy.

Your bus buddy is Jill and hers is Kathy.

Today though, Felicitas is having a hard time.

It didn’t matter that Wolfsburg had won the game. By her high standards, she had played an awful game and she’s just so tired. She is exhausted and furious at herself.

All she wants is to go back to her apartment and sleep. And maybe cuddle with Cinnamon a bit.

Feli is so out of it that she doesn’t notice Jill nudging you and not too quietly murmuring, ‘Go to her.’

Kathy switches with you easily once she sees you coming towards her.

It doesn’t occur to Feli that you have noticed her change in behaviour and would want to check in on her.

So when you slide into the seat beside her and reach out to hold her hand, she jumps with surprise.

‘I got you.’ You promise and guide her to lean against your shoulder.

Felicitas does so with a breath of relief.

When you carefully kiss her cheek and pull her even closer, Feli thinks that everything is going to be okay.

******

You’re more affectionate with her than ever and Feli loves it.

She loves how comfortable you are around her now, from holding her hand on team walks to cuddling with her on her couch.

Now, having traveled back to North London, for the Champions League, Feli is especially glad you’re letting your walls down.

She knows it would be hard for you to be back in your old home so she wants to be there for you, as best as she can.

Svenja had given out the room assignments and you had eagerly pressed a kiss onto Feli’s cheek when you found out she would be with you.

‘Hi roomie.’ You’d teased and she had held out her hand to you.

‘Hello.’ Feli murmurs, smiling when you take her hand.

As she follows you into the elevator, she makes a mental note to thank her captain.

******

You’re so excited to be back in North London. You’ve missed the city and your friends.

You’re even more excited to take Felicitas to your favourite cafe.

She loves coffee more than anyone you have ever known and you hope that she likes the coffee there.

Unfortunately that has to wait till after the game. You will have a chance to do that tomorrow, before you fly back to Germany.

First you have to play and hopefully win against your former team.

But for now, you’re content to watch Feli get ready for bed.

Felicitas who looks so cute with her glasses on.

So you tell her that and she blushes, making you laugh.

******

Feli squeezes your hand in hers as you line up in the tunnel. The Arsenal players aren’t here yet so the defender takes a moment to check on you.

‘You okay?’ She asks and you nod, wrapping your arms around her waist and burying your face into her neck.

You take a deep breath in and Felicitas rubs your back soothingly.

She smells nice and you allow her to calm you down.

Feli places a brief kiss onto your forehead and then steps back as the Arsenal players join your team in the tunnel.

‘Lia!’

The Swiss player hugs you immediately. Lia’s eyes meet Feli’s and she mouths, ‘Thank you.’

******

Your game ends as a draw.

As you go around shaking hands and sharing hugs with your former teammates, there’s a lot of laughter.

But when you’ve made your rounds, you’re back at Feli’s side, slipping your hand into hers as she walks back towards the tunnel.

Feli looks at you in surprise.

‘Don’t you want to spend time with your old teammates?’

‘I have.’ You answer but Felicitas squeezes your hand.

‘Don’t you want to spend more time with them?’

‘Nope. I want to spend time with you now.’

‘Oh.’ Felicitas’ cheeks turn a bright pink and she brings your joined hands up to her lips so that she can kiss the back of your palm.

If Lia or your ex sees the short moment, they don’t say anything.

If your ex-girlfriend glances at Lia, the Swiss woman’s only response is to shrug as if to say, ‘You’ve lost her.’

******

‘To go or having here?’ The barista asks.

Feli eyes you in question and you say, ‘To go please.’

As you wait for your coffees to be ready, you explain, ‘There’s somewhere I want you to see. It meant a lot to me when I was growing up here.’

Felicitas simply holds your hand and smiles at you reassuringly in answer.

When you leave the cafe, she deposits your joined hands in her jacket pocket for warmth. In doing so, she catches the expression of complete adoration on your face and feels the familiar butterflies in her stomach flutter around.

‘How’s your coffee?’ You ask, as you lead her down the street.

Feli grins, ‘It’s good. I understand why this is your favourite coffee.’

‘It isn’t anymore.’ You whisper.

‘It isn’t?’

‘Yours is.’

Felicitas visibly tries and fails to fight back her smile.

‘It’s the cinnamon I put inside isn’t it? I told you it would grow on you.’

‘You were right.’ You admit and Feli laughs. Her thumb brushes over the back of your hand and you duck your head to hide the way your cheeks burn.

‘Come on. We’re almost there.’

‘Okay.’ Feli murmurs.

******

It’s only a short walk from there and it’s spent in comfortable silence.

When you reach a small side street, you gently tug Felicitas with you, into a park just beside it.

‘It’s beautiful here.’ Feli quietly says.

‘It is. But you should see it in the summer. There’s so many flowers then.’

You and Feli sit down beside each other on the bench. You rest your head on her shoulder and Felicitas exhales.

She finishes her cup of coffee and then sets it aside.

‘Why’d you bring me here? Not that I don’t want to spend time with you but why?’

Sitting up properly, you look at Feli for a long moment.

Her eyes are so pretty you think.

Gingerly, you reach out to trace the contours of her jaw. Felicitas melts, leaning into your touch.

Very very slowly, you begin to close the gap.

Feli catches on immediately and she gently stops you.

Your eyes widen with hurt and you pull away, making the German player rush to stop you.

‘Liebling I want this. I really really do. I just need to make sure that it’s what you want too.’ She softly says.

‘Felicitas…’

Feli tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. It’s an infinitely sweet gesture that has your breath catching.

‘You met your ex-girlfriend last night and I know you’re saying you’re okay but that couldn’t possibly have been easy for you.’

‘It wasn’t. But I am okay Felicitas.’

‘But you-’

‘Feli I don’t care about her. I care about you!’

Felicitas stares at you wordlessly.

‘I never brought her here, I’ve never brought anyone here except for you. This is the park where I first learnt to play football.

Your voice is barely audible when you say, ‘It means the world to me and so do you Felicitas.’

This time, when you try to kiss her, Feli doesn’t stop you. She meets you halfway instead.

Dutch Translation:

schat - darling

German Translation:

liebling - love

599 notes · View notes

outlaw-apologist · 1 year

Text

Saved By The Gang | RDR2 x Reader

In which your SO saves you from your kidnappers! This was a request from AO3 :) Characters: Arthur, Hosea, Dutch, Sean, Charles GN!Reader Warnings for each story: Arthur: Graphic depictions of violence, cannibalism, and dismemberment Hosea: Graphic depictions of violence and human trafficking Dutch: Graphic depictions of violence, Dutch being himself Sean: Depictions of violence, use of strong language Charles: Graphic depictions of violence. Implied SA Notes: I kinda ended up writing these more from the characters POVs, so I hope that’s okay. I apologize for any errors of if my writing is bad. I’ve been struggling with insomnia so I'm not thinking great rn. I looked at this so much I kinda hate it lmao so I’m just gonna raw dog my mistakes :’) AO3 Link Arthur: Arthur had been gone for awhile doing the craziest things. He didn’t mean to be away from camp for so long, it just kinda happens. He decided to stop in Van Horn to finish up some quick business when he noticed your horse. Was it really-? Arthur’s eyes narrowed as he studied the markings on the horse’s coat. That definitely was your horse but you weren’t the one in the saddle. “Hey there partner.” Arthur made quick work crossing the road with long purposeful strides. “Where’d you get that there horse?”

The rider looked a bit flustered. “Isn’t’e a beaut? I found it just due south of Roanoke Valley all alone. Rider abandoned it so I thought I outta take ‘em in and give ‘em some good old lovin’.” “Roanoke Valley you say?” He scoffed. What the hell would you be doing up there? “Well, I know the owner of this fine horse and they wouldn’t just go off and leave like that. Where exactly did you find it?” “Listen Mister, I don’t want any trouble.” Agitation arose in the rider causing Arthur to throw his hands up in surrender. “No trouble here. I couldn’t care less about the horse. I just wanna make sure my friend is okay.” After careful consideration the stranger finally shrugged. “I found it drinking at the Kamassa river Northwest of Annesburg.” “Thank ya kindly.” Arthur tipped his head graciously. He hadn’t been up in that area before but the stories he heard weren’t great. This undoubtedly meant trouble. Arthur hardly mounted his horse before a bit of gossip reached his ears. “Another wagon disappeared near the mines. This time three women went missing.” “It’s gotta be that Murfree Brood. I heard they eat anyone they capture. Incestuous cannibals the lot of ‘em. Doubt we’ll ever see those poor women again.” “Shit!” A growl ripped from Arthur’s throat. His heels dug into his horse’s sides and he slapped the reigns. What if that were you? Kidnapped with those women? He needed to find you and fast. “C’mon Y/N. You better not be dead.” His heart pounded in his chest, wind whipping past as he cut off other riders on the trail in haste. He didn’t mean to be gone for so long… Away from YOU for so long… He always thought you understood it. His need to be everywhere and anywhere. And you did… You do… Yet, somehow, regret was eating at him like a deranged wolf. Snapping at the back of his mind, replaying memories upon memories of him returning to your arms after being away for ages. Arthur took for granted that you’d always be there when he gets back. He shouldn’t have left you as much as he does. He should have asked you to come with him. If you had business up in this region he could have been there to protect you. That horse is your world, he knows that. Maybe that’s why his mind was racing with so many regrets and thoughts. That horse is your everything, if you weren’t on that horse you were probably seriously injured… or worse. That realization put a lot into perspective. It was always ‘What if I never return to Y/N?’ and never ‘What if Y/N never returns to me?’ “C’mon Morgan. Keep it together.” He had to shake these stormy thoughts away. Was it possible that he’d find you alright? Maybe a mild injury? Absolutely. But fuck, if it didn’t give him so much anxiety. Upon reaching the approximate area Arthur slowed his horse using gentle praises. “Easy now.” He reached out to pet it appreciatively, allowing his body filled with tension to drop down. Blue green eyes squinted while searching for clues or any sign of his beloved. Luckily Arthur picked up a few things while bounty hunting and it only took him ten or so minutes to find footprints he thinks matches yours. While following them he started noting how far apart your steps were. You were running. ‘Running from what?’ “Christ.” Arthur’s nose wrinkled just as the wind carried over the scent of rotting flesh. Sure enough there was a dead fellow not far from your tracks. The bullet casings surrounding the corps were definitely from your gun. Was this one of the cannibals? Arthur moved the body, flipping it over using his foot. He looked malnourished and white as paper. Even his clothes were rags. Arthur wasn’t really sure exactly what a cannibal looked like but if he had to take a guess, a cannibal would look like this feller right here. “Fuck, Y/N. What’ave you gotten yourself into?” Those sinking thoughts were back, dragging him into a pit of despair. Would he find your half eaten corpse somewhere in the woods? Are you still alive? Were you scared? You’re a shit significant other, Morgan. That’s what he told himself over and over again, shifting trough the bramble. What kind of man doesn’t know what his lover is up to? If he wasn’t so far up the ass of being ‘Arthur Morgan the big bad Outlaw’ he would know. Regret. Regret for not holding you in his arms every night. For not returning to you more often. He should have had more time with you. Should’ve spent every waking moment with you. How could he be so dense? This life was dangerous! He always stressed that to everyone who would listen. So why didn’t he spend all of his free time with you? None of you knew when your last breath would be taken, how could he waste so much precious life away from you? That fear only grew when those scared eyes focused on the disturbing image of human arms sewn together into some kind of hanging tree ornament. A gloved hand covered his mouth to suppress a gag. Gore wasn’t something that usually affected Arthur, but the thought that this could be you made him feel ill. At least he knew he was going in the right direction. It wasn’t long before he stumbled upon a couple of the Brood. He couldn’t hear the exact words being said because his ears immediately attuned to your cries of pain. Creeping closer in the grass, hand on his holster, Arthur grit his teeth at the scene playing out before him. Never in his life had he felt so much white hot rage. One of the sick fucks held you by the hair while another tried to pin you down. “We’re just gonna cut yer leg off!” He laughed. “What’re ya cryin’ for?” “No!” You screamed, desperately trying to fight against them. For three nights you watched in horror as the others captured were slaughtered, tortured, and eaten. Carved like Thanksgiving turkeys. For three whole nights you couldn’t sleep, drink, or eat because you were so terrified of these monsters. They saw how scared you were and they loved it. Milking every second of it. Because of your exhausted state fighting against them was grueling. “You killed our brother, it’s only fair.” A scream ripped through you just as your flesh tore against the blunt blade of a rusty sickle. “Get away!” Everyone froze, heads snapping towards the all too familiar voice. “Arthur?” “Y/N.” Arthur caught your gaze, a look of relief washing over him. You’re alive! “Hey! Who do you think you are coming hea-” The Brood member pulling your hair didn’t have enough time to finish his sentence before his head was blown off with a crackling BANG! Silence rang out after the loud pop from Arthur’s gun, then the mans body dropped. “You shot my brother!” “And I’ll shoot you too if you don’t get the fuck outta here!” With a click of his cattleman revolver, the last man scrambled up to run. “Too slow.” A dirty finger squeezed the trigger and down he fell. You simply stared as everything unfolded before you, your cries not subsiding but becoming much quieter. After all your pain and torment… All those people gutted like human sacrifices… Arthur killed your captors so easily. “Y/N.” His voice was gentle as he knelt beside you. Finally you shattered. Sobbing violently as soon as his arms enveloped you securely. You wanted to say his name. To tell him everything that had happened but couldn’t manage anything past blubbering incoherently. Never had Arthur felt so much heartbreak. Not from any loss or any breakup he had experienced so far. You’re one of the strongest people he knew. Seeing you look so small and afraid was devastating. Especially because this should have never happened to begin with. “I know.” Was all he could say. “Shhh, I know. You’re okay.” While embracing you with one arm he peered over to inspect your thigh. “I know darlin’, I don’t wanna let you go but I need to stop the bleeding.” He quickly hushed the whimper that passed your lips upon feeling his body shift away. Arthur’s fingers trembled, fumbling with his bandanna. Christ, this affected him more than he ever could’ve imagine. It took a minute but finally he managed to tie it above your wound to limit your bloodflow before immediately picking you up. Arthur made sure you could hide your face in his chest so you didn’t have to look at any of the hanging dismemberments on your way out. “God Y/N.” His arms around you were tight. “It’s okay. I’ll protect you. It’s okay now.” He tried to console you. To console himself. Hell, if he were in your shoes this would be more traumatizing for him than the Colm O’Driscolle ordeal. He could only imagine how you feel. Arthur couldn’t even bring himself to sit you on his horse yet. The moment you were in fresh woods he dropped to his knees and held you. Rocking you, kissing your hair and breathing in your scent. Sweet nothings fell from his lips in soft shaky whispers. Pads of calloused thumbs wiping away every tear from your cheeks. All you could do was cry and cling to him. All he could do was hold you as if it were for the last time. And it almost was. The last time. “How’d you find me?” After what seemed like hours of you two embracing each other, Arthur finally helped you onto his horse and you were on your way back to camp. “Saw some feller in Van Horn ridin’ your horse. Complete coincidence.” Arthur could feel how tense that statement made you so he added quickly, “Don’t worry. I’ll get your horse back. I just wanted to make sure you were safe first.” “Thank you, Arthur. For everything.” “I know how much you love that horse, it’s nothin’.” “No, I mean… Thank you for always being there when I need you.” Silence washed over the both of you. Arthur didn’t know how to respond. “I’m sorry darlin’.” You could feel him arm gently tighten around you in a loose hug. “I could’ve lost you tonight. I got to thinkin’ and… I know I haven’t been the best to you. I always prioritize everyone else. It shouldn’t be like that.” “Oh Arthur-” “I’m serious. I’ve lost Mary and Eliza. Most of my friends are long cold in their graves. I don’t know nothin’ about gods or divine intervention. Don’t know if something led me to you or not this time around….. I guess I was always feelin’ sorry for you because you’re datin’ a walkin’ target. Thought some space between us might do us some good in case I die. Never did I once consider life without you.” Arthur let out a hollow laugh which lacked any mirth or warmth. “What a fool I’ve been. I ain’t never learn my lesson. Tonight showed me that, that’s for damn sure. I dunno what you were doin’ out here but for now on if I leave camp I’m not going anywhere without you.” An exhausted smile reached your lips. “Good. My handsome man, it’s always been you and me. You just had to ask.” “You and me, huh? I like the sound of that.” You fell asleep in Arthur’s arms long before you reached camp. Arthur held you when you arrived, petting your hair as Ms. Grimshaw stitched up your leg. Arthur was needy after your attack. He never let you out of his sight and would always insist on holding you. Especially during nightmares that plagued you for months after the accident. Arthur stayed up singing to you and rocking you for many many long nights. And, of course, he got your horse back! How he did it or by what means, you didn’t care to ask. Slowly life returned to normal and the incident was long behind you both. Arthur kept his promise to take you everywhere until the very end. ___ Hosea: Five minutes. He took his eyes off of you for FIVE minutes so he could speak to the owner of a fence in San Denis while you waited for him outside, and you were gone. “Y/N?” He called out in confusion, scanning the sidewalks and streets for any sign of you. At first he’s annoyed. Did you wander off without saying anything? Hosea waved over the nearest group of men lingering nearby. “Good day. You wouldn’t happen to have seen my associate hanging around out here, would you? They seemed to have disappeared.” One of the men nodded. “Oh yeah, some nasty business I tell ya.” Well shit. “Nasty?” Hosea cocked his head, resting his hand over his holstered gun. “How so?” “These crazies came and bonked them over the head, saying they owed money or somthin’. Decided to mind my own business because they’re all brandishing guns.” “Money, huh? What way did they go?” “That way.” He pointed Eastward. “Towards the docks.” Tipping his hat, Hosea made his way down the sidewalk. He looked both ways before crossing the road, grabbing onto the trolley as it passes, riding the step until he reached the docks. The sun was setting but he knew your form like the back of his hand. It wouldn’t be too hard to spot you against the fire of the sky. However, you nor the supposed men were anywhere in sight. “Excuse me.” He flagged down a sailor and asked him if he’s seen you. He had not. Neither had the other five people he asked. Hosea knew this wasn’t good. The trail ran cold, leaving him hopeless. There was nothing he could do but return to Shady Belle with a heavy heart. As your husband he was always supposed to protect you. Never in a million years did he think you’d be snatched away right under his nose. Mounting Silver Dollar, Hosea struggled to hold his tears at bay. The city was starting to suffocate him and he needed to leave in order to breathe and think. The weight of the world was finally settling into his old bones on the ride back. The horror the gang had experienced the last few months was devastating. The Blackwater incident aside – Arthur’s escape from Colm, Sean’s death, little Jack’s kidnapping…. Dutch wasn’t listening to reason anymore. The gang was in shambles and now… He let out a defeated sob, hanging over his horse for privacy. What was he supposed to do without you? You’re all he has left. His entire world. What if he wouldn’t be able to find you? It all happened so quickly. To think only an hour ago you were fixing his shirt collar, hanging on his arm with a smile on your face and now POOF! Gone. This was the last drop in the bucket for Hosea. Suddenly he couldn’t stop his tears no matter how hard he tried. He was tired. So god damn tired. Silver Dollar slowed to a stop just off the road. If anyone who passed-by peered close enough through the darkness they could make out the silhouette of a broken man with his head in his hands. He kicked himself for stalling your rescue. Precious time finding you, wasted. By the time he made it back to camp it was late into the night. Dragging himself up the stairs of Shady Belle he knocked on the door to Dutch’s room. Candlelight could be seen flickering through the crack of the doorway leading to Hosea believe he must still be awake. Silence. He knocked again, this time Hosea could hear the bed squeak. “You better have a good reason to disturb me.” Those words flew sharply through the cold humid air. “Dutch…” Hosea would have cursed himself for sounding so… weak. Calling out his friend’s name with a wavering voice. It was noticeable enough to immediately draw Dutch’s attention. The bed squeaked under Dutch’s weight then heavy footsteps led to the door. Hosea kept his gaze down, watching Dutch’s shadow as he moved until the door creaked open and the faint candlelight illuminated Hosea in contrast against the inky hallway. “Hosea- What happened?” “Y/N… I don’t know, it all happened so fast.” Wrapping an arm around Hosea, Dutch led him inside, guiding him to sit. “What happened to Y/N?” “I was looking for a buyer for the bonds we have left, asked them to wait outside because I was just going to be a moment. I stepped out and Y/N was gone. Apparently a group of men took them towards the docks. I tried not to arouse suspicion, I-… Maybe I should’ve gotten there faster, I don’t know…” He shook his head as if to clear it. “Y/N wasn’t there. I may have been too late.” “Someone just took them? In broad daylight?” “Just like that.” Hosea snapped his fingers. “Somethin’ aint right.” Rubbing his chin quizzically, Dutch began pacing the room. “Y/N isn’t stupid, they would’ve screamed or something. You really didn’t hear anything?” He paused to watch Hosea shake his head. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Staring down at his hands, Hosea slowly uncurled his fingers, watching the light dance over his palms. “It was a setup.” “It was a setup.” His friend repeated. “But by who?” “Could be Milton.” “I don’t think so. He’s a thorn in our side. If it were Milton he would’ve showed up in our camp already. Waving Y/N around like a prize.” “That’s very true…” Hosea only looked up when he heard Dutch abruptly halt. “It can’t be….” “What?” “Perhaps… Bronte had a hand in this? I don’t think we’ve done anything to cross him but he’s the only man in the city who could kidnap anyone in broad daylight and not a soul would tell.” He could feel the relief wash through him, the possibility bringing him a weird sense of comfort. He hoped it was Bronte. That would mean you’re probably safe and sound somewhere just like Jack was. “We’ll get Y/N back, Hosea. Let me pull some strings. We’ll find them.” The strings were pulled quite quickly as Hosea found himself waiting outside yet another fabulous party for Arthur to return. “It wasn’t Bronte.” His heart sank. “It wasn’t? Are you sure?” “Pretty sure.” Arthur leaned against the residential fence while lighting a cigarette. He was gussied up to fit the mood. “Asked around ‘n’ nobody had a clue what I was sayin’. I did, however, get this.” Held out between two fingers was a business card. Interested, Hosea accepted it. “Exotic Imports and… Impurities?” “Human trafficking. They apparently have these masquerade parties where rich folk can bid on people anonymously. I think that’s where Y/N is.” God… Was Saint Denis truly such a shit hole? He knew this place was low, but a human trafficking ring? “Are you sure?” Arthur met Hosea’s gaze with the most sincere look he could muster. “Hosea-” “I know you wouldn’t lie to me dear boy.” “I heard someone mentioning there’ll be an auction there this Friday. They mentioned someone who sounds pretty darn close to Y/N’s description in the lineup. I’ll scope the place out, maybe we can rescue Y/N sooner than that. And if not…” Hosea tucked the card into his pocket. “I guess we’re attending the masquerade.” Arthur knows how much you and Hosea are sweet on each other. How hard it was for Hosea after Bessie’s passing and how you brought life back into him. Arthur would do anything for you. So when he had to scope out where the auction will take place he took the job very seriously. He wanted to get you out as soon as possible if you were really there. The place was heavily armed, much to his dismay. An open window was easy enough to sneak into but getting you out was near impossible. He couldn't even find you. However, in a back room Arthur discovered a pile of discarded clothing. A shoe caught his eye, one he knew you wore often. Before he was able to grab it Arthur had to leave as the area filled with guards. “Y/N is in there alright. Too busy for me to get ‘em.” He reported back upon his return to camp. That’s how Hosea, Dutch, Arthur, Bill, Micah, and Charles found themselves attending one of the most unnerving ‘parties’ in San Denis on a muggy Friday evening. They looked expensive, dressed down to the newest shoes on the market. Each donning their own masquerade mask. The building looked beautiful. Expensive. Guest flooded the entrance. “Guns aren’t allowed at this event.” A doorman held his hands out while the gang handed over their weapons. They weren’t worried. If everything was going according to plan John and Javier should already be inside posing as security. Upon entering the mansion, the gang mingled and sweet-talked everyone they could. Trying to get information, word of your safety, anything. One by one they slipped out of the room to John or Javier who gave their guns back to them before joining the guests in the auction room. The auction room was massive, theatrical even. Women in glorious gowns, men who’s suits cost more than a house, they all gathered with glasses filled with alcohol of their choosing. Chatting and laughing as if they’re about to watch a play. Hosea’s stomach churned. The curtains opened to reveal the first person to be auctioned. It was a young girl trembling and sobbing. He gripped the armrest of his seat, knuckles turning white. One by one these people were being bid on. “7,000 dollars. Do I hear 7,000 dollars? 7,500. 8,000 to the man in white!” All of this stress made him want to down glass after glass of alcohol. If he didn’t need to be clear headed he would’ve. “Next up, folks, is person number 9.” You were shoved onstage. Even though your face was covered he recognized you immediately. Almost a week ago you were idly waiting outside, gazing down at your clothing trying to fix a button when you were struck from behind. Blurry vision greeted you after, god only knows how long you were unconscious. Blinking it away you tried to move but to no avail. Hands and feet bound, you were left alone in a cold room. Little light trickled into your cell. You could hear the cries and pleas of other people who were presumably prisoners too. Every time you tried to snap at or fight against the guards they beat you. They fed you just enough food and water to keep you barely alive. It was hell. Every night you prayed someone would find you. Anyone! Hosea, Arthur- were they looking for you? It had been so long…. “Get up.” You snapped awake with a groan as you were kicked. The guard pulled you up, dragging you to get washed and dressed. Stumbling into a back room after being shoved, you blinked at all the faces staring back at you. These were the people you heard crying at night. “What’s happening?” You whispered. Only one woman was brave enough to speak up. Her low voice shook with emotion. “They’re selling us.” “What!?” “Be quiet or I’ll make you quiet!” A guard snarled at you, causing you to shy away. For hours you listened silently to the auction from backstage. Was this really happening? It felt so surreal. Fear filled you as the line moved forward until you were next. A bag was forced onto your head so you couldn’t see. Fingers dug into your arms, you could feel yourself being dragged onto the stage, causing you to stumble. “Next up, folks, is person number 9.” Your breath hitched painfully. Heart racing loudly. This is it. You were about to be sold as person number 9. Bracing yourself for the bidding a loud boom crackled beside you, so loud it made your ears ring. Your head snapped in the direction it came from. Not being able to see anything, panic arose within you as the screams and sounds of running reached you. The crowd was fleeing for their lives! Gunshots popped off in the surrounding area. You ducked down in case any bullets flew your way. “Y/N!” “H-Hosea?” The bag was lifted off your head, beaming lights above glared into your eyes causing you to squint. Hosea’s face slowly came into view. He wrapped his arms around you, throwing you over his shoulder. “I’d love to have a romantic reunion with you, my dove, but I’m afraid we’re in the midst of a shootout.” “I can see that.” You groaned, hanging onto him. For an older man he sure did carry you with ease while shooting his way out with the gang backing him up on either side. “Hosea, let’s go!” Dutch shot the guard who blocked off the door. Hosea had to pass you to Arthur, who barreled through a cloud of bullets with you safely tucked in his arms. He was able to reach the rendezvous carriage, placing you inside before anyone else could enter. Hosea slid in and gathered you in his arms. “Drive, damn it!” He called out, causing the carriage to lurch violently before moving. “Oh Y/N. Oh my little dove.” He carefully looked you over as tears filled your eyes. You were shaking, veins pumping with adrenaline. Your rescue happened so quickly it made your head dizzy. Hosea’s hands were gentle as he touched you in case anything hurt or scared you in your shaken state. He examined every inch. Face was pensive, while taking in every mark and bruise on your delicate skin. “Are you seriously hurt anywhere?” “No.” You whispered, pressing against your husband for comfort. He gladly held you, kissing your lips over and over again. “I’m sorry it took me so long my love. I shouldn’t have let you out of my sight.” Hosea rest his head atop yours and rubbed circles on your back soothingly. “Let’s get you back to camp and fed.” “Thank you.” You nuzzled him, breathing in his comforting scent. “I knew you’d come for me. I missed you.” “I missed you too.” The rest of the ride was quiet. When the carriage parked outside of Shady Belle, Hosea scooped you up immediately. You gasped as the whole gang rushed over to greet you. “Y/N’s back!” Abigail announced. “Oh Y/N, I’m so glad you’re safe!” Mary-Beth gushed with relief. Even Pearson was there to see you. “Welcome home Y/N. Camp ain’t the same without ya.” “Thank you everyone.” You let out a watery laugh, heart filled with love. You were so appreciated amongst this group and it showed. Hosea brought you inside, cleaning you carefully. He asked if anything hurt or if anyone touched you and you responded with yes or no. He clothed you in his own clothes, hoping his scent would bring comfort. A warm bowl of stew was pushed into your hands. Hosea held you while you ate and snuggled you up until you went to bed. He played with your hair all night, unable to sleep after losing you. ___ Dutch: Dutch doesn’t notice you’re gone until the ransom note arrives. “$3,000 in exchange for your lover?” He scoffed. “Who does he think he is? We’ll light his ass up.” The page was quickly crumpled in his hand. Dutch felt a deadly fury rise in him so great his own blood ran colder than the Upper Montana river. Colm O'Driscoll won’t get away with it this time. Not after what he’s done to Dutch’s past lover and to Arthur. “Dutch, I think we should be cool about this one. He already captured me to draw you in for the Pinkertons. He’s probably not done try’nna cut his deal with ‘em. If we ride in hot-” “Not now, Arthur. A few Pinkertons we can handle. This is Y/N we’re talking about, for Christ’s sake.” He scoffed, face snarling up in anger. “Y/N would have come for you, dear boy, had we known you were taken. Y/N would have come for you.” Arthur heaved out a sigh. He still wasn’t fully well after the green gang shot him up. “I know, Dutch. I love Y/N just as much as anyone. We ain’t ever leave one of us behind. I just think… If they want to draw us in they’ll treat Y/N right. If it’s a trap it’ll make more sense for us to come in quiet and get Y/N outta there safely.” “We don’t have time!” Dutch grabbed his gun, much to Arthur and Hosea’s exasperation. “Dutch, I know you love Y/N, but I think Arthur may be right.” “Who’s side are you on, Hosea? If that were you we would already be on the road.” He waved his gun around before holstering it. The air in camp was tense. Dutch seemed… Unsettled. Unpredictable. His eyes were crazy. Love made him crazy. “Who’s with me? John, Micah, Bill?” John and Arthur exchanged looked while Bill jumped up eagerly. Micah seemed interested but didn’t bother grabbing anything extra like the others. “I’m comin’ with you.” Arthur’s shoulders fell. He followed Dutch through camp up to The Count which Dutch mounted with ease. “No, dear boy. You rest. Watch the camp with Hosea, we should be back before dawn.” “Alright, if you say so. Be careful out there Dutch. Things are getting nasty. Bring Y/N home.” “Oh, I intend to.” With the rescue party ready Dutch rode out with his boys. “If you see an O’Driscoll, shoot. If you see a Pinkerton, shoot. We leave no one alive. Not even the women. If Colm wants to play, we’ll play. By our rules.” John moved up beside Dutch, calling out over the whistling wind. “Are you sure about this Dutch? What if Y/N gets hurt?” “Y/N isn’t getting hurt.” The words were spoken as if John’s idea was ludicrous. “Now you boys know how I feel about Y/N. And I-… Well, call me foolish, but I’ll never let any man, beast, or tycoon lay a finger on the love of my life. The moment we slaughter his sons he’ll know we mean business. Colm is many things, but stupid he is not. He knows hurting Y/N would give us cause to burn his world down piece by piece and I don’t think he could take the heat.” “As is your right, Dutch.” Micah spoke up. “The O'Driscolls should know by now you’re a kind and just man. I’m sure they understand the reckoning hurting their assets would bring.” Feeding into Dutch’s anger pleased the gang leader. “That’s what I thought.” He agreed. The rest of the ride was tense with anticipation. John knew there was nothing he could say. He just hoped you’d survive all of this. Dutch was getting sloppy and with you involved… He would slaughter the whole world if he had to. “We’re here.” Dutch announced. Night had long fallen by the time they reached the O’Driscoll hideout. “Let’s make a little noise. Micah-” Riding closer to the compound, Micah lit a stick of dynamite, throwing it over the fence. Dutch watched with great pleasure as the O’Driscoll boys caught in the blast began to scream. “Let’s show them you don’t fuck with Dutch van der Linde.” The guns came out. Time slowed down, men began to rush at them. The Count reared, spooked by the sudden barrage of bullets. Dutch shot every single O’Driscoll effortlessly, one by one. You were beginning to think Dutch wasn’t coming. Why would he after Arthur outed Colm’s setup a week ago? They had kicked your face in until your mouth filled with blood and your nose cracked in three different places. Breathing was hard with your damaged ribs. The O’Driscoll’s wasted no time in beating you to a bloody pulp before tying you up. The way you were tied was ridiculous. Your hands and feet were tied separately then were tied together to ensure you wouldn’t be able to move an inch. You guessed Arthur’s escape was a sore spot. You struggled and fought until the ropes dug angry marks, rubbing the skin away. In all honestly you usually would have half a mind to spit at or curse any O’Driscoll out, however this seemed different. It was grim, very grim. You remember how scary it was watching Arthur collapse off his horse barely alive and wondered – would you make it? Surely they won’t let an escape happen again... Dutch would probably move camp, you thought. And if you could survive… I don’t know, a week longer, he’ll come and get you. These were the thoughts running through your head while you tried to plan your survival. ‘It’ll be torture, but I can last that long’, you reassured yourself. It didn’t work. Colm killed Dutch’s girl way back, what’s stopping him from doing it again? You knew the man had a nasty streak to him. And Dutch… well... killing you sure would make Dutch slip up enough to get caught. That bastard Colm just wanted to see him hang. Many many thoughts occupied your mind as you dozed off. Aches and pains were screaming at you so being unconscious was probably best. At the brink of sleep you were jolted wide awake by a loud explosion. You froze, halting your breath, straining your ears to listen. Silence. What’s going on? BANG BANG BANG! Dutch- It had to be him! Your face lit up with hope, eyes fixated on the door. Any minute now... The O’Driscoll’s screamed, cursed, and cried out. “Get ‘em!” “Don’t let them inside!” “We gotta hold this for Colm!” Despite anticipating its happening you still flinched back when the door was kicked in. “Y/N.” Dutch sighed out of relief. Kneeling down he cut you loose, brushing the hair from your face. You both were quiet. Just taking each other in. You because you had missed him, and him because he was stunned by how badly you were beaten. “Those animals. We’ll make ‘em pay.” Dutch’s words were said more to himself than to you. “I’m alright, I can walk, I think-” Helping you up, Dutch’s eyes filled with sadness when he noticed you wincing. He could hear your chest heave with pain and it was grading against his eardrums. “I’ll carry you. Just hang on, we haven’t cleared them all yet.” Scooping you into his chest, your arms were granted purchase around his neck. Dutch was stronger than he looked. He held onto you with one arm wrapped tightly to secure you while shooting any man who ran this way with the other. “Bastards! They’re everywhere! John, Micah, let’s go!” “You get Y/N?” John asked after shooting three more men. There were so many O’Driscolls they couldn’t even take their eyes off them to check on you. “Yeah. Let’s get outta here.” Micah covered Dutch’s right while John covered his left and back. They shot the best they could until finally they were free of the building. Dutch placed you on The Count, climbing behind you. The others quickly mounted seeing as there was no way they’d win this gun battle if they stayed. “Shit! Incoming!” Bill cried out, alerting everyone to the drove of Pinkerton galloping straight towards the gang’s direction. “God dammit!” Jerking the reigns, Dutch kicked his horse into action. “This way, c’mon! Let’s lose them through the trees. We gotta hope we can outrun them.” There you were, rocketing towards salvation on a white horse. Pinkertons and O’Driscolls crashing down around you like violent ocean waves. There was so much noise to the point where your ears rang in an effort to tune it all out. Breath didn’t leave your body. Time slowed. You watched in horror. Every bullet shot by John seemed to take ages before knocking down its opponent. Bill was screaming yet not a word of it reached you. You could feel Dutch’s arm wrap tighter and tighter around your waist. Suddenly you’re soaring through the air, hair flying back against the dusty breeze. This was it. The moment of truth. The Count’s feet touched down after leaping over a fence and suddenly time returned to normal and everything sped up in your race for life. Your heart thuds erratically, clammy hands clinging to the saddle for dear life. “Duck!” Dutch ordered and you immediately lowered your head before a low hanging branch creamed you. You stayed low Dutch’s body now covering you protectively. You couldn’t see and had no idea what was going on. Your own breathing was so loud at this point it took you awhile to register – the shooting had stopped. There was no more screaming, no more calling out or angry orders being shouted. Only the sound of four horses huffing and puffing and your own shaky breaths filled the air. “My love… Are you alright?” Dutch lifted himself off of you, his horse slowing to rest. “I…. I think so.” You gazed down at your hands and arms before looking at Dutch with wide traumatized eyes. “Oh, my little bird. I’m so sorry they hurt you. I came as soon as I could. They’ll pay for this.” Something sinister swirled behind his eyes but his fingers were gentle against your skin while caressing your face. “Come now, let’s get you cleaned up and to bed. You need rest.” Dutch kissed your shoulder. “I’m so glad you’re here now. So glad.” ___ Sean: Sean thought you were mad at him. Avoiding him for some awful comment he made because he, yet again, went too far. It hurt his feelings but he decided you’d probably come back when you were ready to see him again. “Sean, have you seen Y/N?” Mary-Beth asked. “I haven’t seen Y/N since yesterday morning.” Sean’s heart fell to the pit of his stomach. You weren’t the type to leave camp often or without someone accompanying you. “Christ, I haven’t. Where’d you last see them?” “Over by Kieran. I already asked him and he said Y/N helped with the horses then wandered off.” “An’ no one saw them come back?” He began power walking through camp, searching the area for you. “Has anyone seen Y/N?” Tilly and Uncle shook their heads, John just gave a shrug. “That isn’t weird to any of yous?” His voice was raised enough to get the attention of Arthur who had just rode in. “What’s goin’ on now?” “Y/N is fucking missing and no one said a damn word about it.” “Alright, alright calm down. I’m sure we can find them, where were they last?” “Oh I don’t know English, lemme just take this crystal ball out of my ass-” Sean rolled his eyes while grabbing his gun. “We’re gonna have to track them down. Think you can do that?” “Well…” Arthur wipes the sweat from his brow. “Charles taught me a few things.” He paused, gently catching Sean’s shoulder. “I know you’re upset but I need you to keep your head. I’m sure wherever Y/N is they’re okay. We’ll get them back safe.” “Speak for yourself, I always keep my wits.” “That right there is what I’m worried about.” Arthur huffed while mounting his horse. Sean was silently grateful for Arthur’s words though he’d never admit it. There was a storm churning inside of him. An ocean of guilt rocking his consciousness. If only he respected your boundaries and didn’t make that joke maybe you wouldn’t have gone missing. “We’ll bring Y/N back safe.” He repeated to himself, climbing onto his saddle. Arthur gave him an affirmative nod. They rode around the outskirts of Clemens Point looking for any sign of you. Sean felt like throwing up the whole entire time. Suspense was killing him. “Over here!” Air left his lungs in relief as soon as Arthur’s voice broke through the thick air. Walking his horse over, that relief was short lived. “Fuck.” Sean hissed. Arthur held a ripped piece of fabric clearly bloodied. The fabric was from something you wore often making it was unmistakable. “Looks like three riders were here. ‘Dunno who they could be, but…” Morgan hesitated, knowing Sean probably shouldn’t hear the next part. “There was quite the struggle.” The Irishman cursed, kicking at a nearby stone, sending it throttling into the trees. “I’ll kill every last one of ‘em! I swear it.” The Van der Linde boys followed the hoof prints best they could, using other clues to figure out what way your kidnappers may have turned when the trail disappeared. With each passing minute Sean’s knuckles turned more and more white around his reigns. “I shouldn’t have said anything. This is my fault.” His feelings were so big inside of him they spilled out of his lips like a broken dam. “I’m a right bastard.” “You two have a fight?” “Sort of… We was fuckin’ around and Y/N got sick of me and asked me to stop teasing them but they look so cute when they’re angry I just- I don’t know.” He hung his head. Arthur studied him silently as they rode. “Well… Sounds about right for you two. I’m sure Y/N wouldn’t blame you.” “Maybe not, English, but I blame myself. I just hope they’re okay.” They didn’t talk any more after that unless to comment on the path changing. A few hours away from camp they came across smoke indicating a fire, right in the general direction of your kidnappers. “Must be them.” Sean was ready to charge in, but Arthur’s hand shot out across Sean’s chest, stopping him in his tracks. “We should get to higher ground first, see what we’re dealing with.” “Are you crazy? Y/N could be there!” “That’s exactly why we can’t rush in like fools! What happened to keepin’ your wits? Do you want Y/N getting shot?” Sean’s mouth opened and closed, words getting choked up in his throat. The thought of you getting shot was about to bring tears to his eyes. Shoulders slumping forward, he sucked in a shuddering breath. “Let’s go look up that hill.” “That’s better.” Arthur snapped his kicked his feet, leading his horse higher with Sean close behind. Sean wasn’t playing around now. Knowing you might be close and that you were probably hurt- It took everything in him to quench ranging fire burning within. He whipped out his binoculars, setting eyes on the men surrounding the campfire. “Stupid Lemoyne fucks.” “Do you see Y/N?” Arthur asked. Sean moved his binoculars with his turning head. “I’ve got eyes on them. They’re tied to a wagon just outside of where they’re sitting.” He bit his lip while taking in your sorry form. You were filthy, bloodied, and your face was swollen. They clearly didn’t treat you kindly. “Let’s kill those fucks, Morgan. My baby needs me.” Without another word Sean tucked the binoculars away, charging full force down the hill, cattleman revolver in hand. He managed to shoot one guy in the throat, ducking on his horse to avoid the flying bullets. His horse galloped straight for you, stopping just shy with the intention of creating a barrier between you and the shootout. Arthur did most of the shooting while Sean nearly flung himself off his horse to cut you free. “Oh my baby! What did those bastards do to you?” He gently cleaned your face with his handkerchief, ignoring all the gory sounds echoing from behind. Sean didn’t even notice when everything became silent. You had his full undivided attention. “Sean!” You wept, wrapping your arms around his neck to bury your face into his chest. “I’m sorry baby. I should’ve never let you out of my sight. I’ve got you, my rose. I’m here now.” He kissed your hair, rubbing your back. “Did they hurt you real bad?” Tears now stung his eyes when you nodded. It was difficult seeing you this way. He loves you more than anything else in the world, seeing his partner so beaten and broken- “Shhhh. We’ll make it better.” Sean attempted to calm his tears, crying silently while burying his face in your hair. His chest was warm and welcoming after what you’ve endured. Even though every bone in your body ached all you wanted to do was hug him and you were grateful he didn’t pull away immediately and put you on a horse. “I love you. So much. I was so scared.” You whimpered. “I know, I know I’m so sorry Y/N. About everything. I should’ve never pushed your buttons. I thought you ran away.” “What?” You pulled away in confusion, studying his face. “Sean… You think I’m upset about that?” It was cute seeing Sean feel guilty over a minor playful argument, something you both have often, and you couldn’t help but to giggle. “Don’t be silly.” You reached up, wiping away his tears. Confused, Sean gently caught your hand, pressing kisses to your palm while examining the bruising on your skin. “I guess that’s who I am when I’m with you, Y/N. A silly man. C’mon now.” Carefully you were scooped up into a loving embrace. Sean placed a peck on your lips. He was afraid of hurting you further so he treated you as though you were made of glass. Once you were in his saddle he pulled himself up behind you. “Let’s get you to camp, baby. I’ll make you feel better there.” “Thank you.” You pressed your back against him in relief. Exhaustion flooded your still trembling body. You never had any doubt Sean would come for you but the experience of the Lemoyne Raiders kicking your face in was rather traumatic. “Glad to see you’re okay L/N.” Arthur shot you a little smile. “Sean here was real riled up about your disappearance. Nearly bit my head off.” A faint smile crossed your lips. You winced as your skin pulled on a bruise. “Thank you for coming too, Arthur. If you weren’t here I don’t think he would have been able to rescue me.” “Oh not this again!” Sean groaned. His arm was wrapped loosely around you and he still pressed an odd kiss to your hair here or there. “I would've done just fine!” “You shot one bullet!” Arthur pointed out with a laugh. “Then you flung yourself over your lover like some actor in one of those dramas. If I weren’t here you and Y/N would be riddled with holes by now.” “I love you Arthur Morgan, but shut up. I killed that fellow with one shot! ONE!” “What was stopping you from killing the rest of ‘em?” “Y/N needed me!” “See if I didn’t come-” “Shut up Morgan!” Listening to their familiar arguments was the best welcome home you could’ve ever wished for. Your eyes fell shut as you listened and soon the pain shooting through you and the exhaustion of being awake and afraid all night started catching up. Slowly your body fell limp against Sean’s chest. You were only faintly aware of his arm tightening around you, keeping you safely on the horse. It was pitch black when you came to. Fear shot you awake, your eyes scanning the darkness. “Sean?” You could hear an exhausted exhale to your right, a hand reached out from the black to gently pet your hair. “I’m here baby.” There was some fumbling then a match lit, illuminating your lover who had fallen asleep sitting next to you. Sean lit a lantern and that’s when you noticed you were laying in Arthur’s cot. “We thought it best to give you some privacy until you’re in tip top shape. Said I wasn’t allowed to sleep with you in it though.” Sean leaned forward, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I’m just glad to have you back. Get some rest, no one will hurt you now. I’m here.” Relaxing again your fingers laced with Sean’s as you settled back in to sleep. ____ Charles: Charles usually minded his own business whenever you fucked off outta camp for a few days. You had been running with the gang far longer than he has and everyone knew you to be quite capable. God only knows what you’re up to half the time. Similar to Arthur, you’d go off and do your own thing then return with money or a fresh kill and a story of your adventures. Charles likes that about you. He admires your independence and how you have so much strength. When you didn’t show up to camp for a week he didn’t think anything of it. You were probably off climbing waterfalls or helping strangers. The gang carried on as normal unless Dutch wanted to offload a job onto you, then he’d ask around. “Charles.” Dutch called him over with a waggle of his finger. He already heard him calling your name and asking the ladies if they’ve seen you so Charles had an inkling as to what this was about. “Can you go find Y/N? I don’t care what it takes, just get their ass over here. We have money to make.” Charles didn’t mind being asked. Any reason to get some peace and quiet and reunite with you was a good reason in his eyes. The problem was, you were flightly, and your tracks were old. It has rained twice since you left camp. Charles followed your prints the best he could. Up into Strawberry, then to Mt.Shann where he took a break to enjoy the view and watch the birds. Charles smiled a little when he saw you had set camp there at one point. It was a beautiful place to stay, he would have done the same. He then doubled back to Owanjila lake where you had your second camp. He wondered what you were doing in the area, having absolutely no clue. He did, however, chuckle to himself when he found one of your gloves that you must have dropped. “Oh, Y/N.” The words slipping from his lips were fond and warm. He scooped the glove up deciding to store it in Taima’s saddle bag then he carried on his way. Charles began to get confused when your trail led straight back to Valentine. So… you were close to camp and didn’t stop by to rest your horse or grab supplies? That’s very unlike you. These tracks were fresher, not more than a few days old if even. Your lover became frustrated when entering town as the hoof prints belonging to your horse became lost in the bustle of main street and Charles couldn’t pick them up again. “Excuse me. Have you seen-” He began stopping residence of Valentine, asking of your whereabouts. You had been seen at the arms store and according to the man at the front desk of the Saints Hotel you stopped by for a wash only a day before. Well… If you were here yesterday you’ll probably be back at camp soon. After thanking the clerk, Charles returned to Horseshoe Overlook to inform Dutch you’d be back soon. The next day Charles awoke early. “Mr. Smith, can you please go into town and get us some supplies? Normally L/N does it but they ain’t back yet. Ms. Grimshaw ain’t too pleased.” He was attempting to enjoy his early morning coffee when Karen approached him. “Sure.” He set his cup down, accepting the list. “Did Pearson add what he needed?” “He only asked for corn.” He raised a brow in amusement, sharing a knowing look with Karen. “I understand.” Tucking it away safely Charles finished his coffee, throwing the rest out, then made his way to Taima. Your whereabouts weighed heavily on his mind during his ride into Valentine. ‘I miss Y/N’, he thought to himself ‘I hope they return soon’. Camp just wasn’t the same without you. He liked the gang alright but he liked you more. Valentine was a breath of fresh air after Blackwater. Quite literally. Charles took deep breaths, breathing in the crisp mountain air before entering town. Taima was soon hitched outside the general store where Charles leisurely strolled in. He walked around, footsteps echoing in the empty room as he gazed at the shelves. The clerk wasn’t there. “Hello?” He called out. Soon, sound of a door being swung open and rushed footsteps up the stairs filled the silence from what he assumed must have been the store room. “I’ll be right with you.” You were bound painfully tight. Ropes dug into your skin until your wrists bled. Tied to a chair and gagged. It had all happened so fast. Days ago you were going about business as usual. You stocked your ammo; took a nice long bath; and followed a dog around you wanted to pet before returning to camp, and of course, to the arms of Charles. What can you say? You love dogs and this one was particularly funny. You had grinned to yourself, studying the animal as you followed it out back. You didn’t expect to look up and be met with the stares of men who were clearly in the middle of an illegal operation. “Shit!” Your hand flew to your holster then froze as you heard a click and felt the barrel of a gun pressed to the back of your head. Your hands slowly rose as you tried to eye whoever was behind you. “Well well well, look what we have here, fellers.” “Real unfortunate, ain’t it?” You narrowed your eyes but kept silent. O’Driscolls by the looks of ‘em. “Hey…” A tall one began circling you, looking you over as if you were bait. “I remember you. You run with the Van der Linde boys, don’tcha?” This wasn’t good. “I think you’ve mistaken, mister.” “No… No I recognize you alright.” He stopped in front of you, leaning so close you had to recoil when the stench of his foul breath hit your face. “This isn’t your lucky day-” Before you could react he drew his elbow back and punched you so hard you nearly flew to the ground. Quiet laughs rang out among the group. Pain overcame you when one grabbed you by the hair, literally dragging you into the basement of their operation where you were hastily tied up and beaten several times among other unsavory happenings. For days you starved. Your face swollen beyond recognition. Only did the grocer show you any compassion. Feeding you water while muttering little ‘I’m so sorry, I wish we could let you go’s. He was a nervous man… A sweaty man. Hell you’d be nervous too if a gaggle of insane Irishmen took over the basement of your shop. You appreciated his little kindness but the weight of the situation was never lost on you. You needed to get out and soon, or else they’ll kill you. You thought of Charles and your beloved friends Arthur, Mary-Beth, and Lenny. Were they looking for you? Did they ever realize you disappeared? Today repeated the last two. The second the O’Driscolls noticed you were conscious their abuse started again up until mid morning when they left to take care of some business. The clerk made his way into the basement, removing your gag so he could give you water. “I’m sorry but you have to understand. If I let you go they’ll kill me.” You were too tired to argue with your heavily bruised jaw, sipping at the cool liquid. Suddenly a sound met your ears. Old floorboards overhead creaked with heavy footsteps. “Oh goddammit.” Cloth was shoved into your mouth once more, immediately drying your tongue. “H-Hold on. Stray here..” You glared at the clerk. Where the hell were you gonna go all tied up like this? The sweaty man dabbed his forehead with a handkerchief, opening the door that divided you from the outside world. “Hello?” A voice called out, rushing the clerk who felt so overwhelmed and frenzied with stress that he accidentally left the door open. “I’ll be right with you.” Staying coherent is a struggle for you at this point. Listening to light footsteps run up the stairs you let your head hang limp against your shoulder. “What can I help you with?” “Just here to resupply. Do you happen to have… uh… a bushel of corn?” “Corn? Yeah, we got it.” Wait… was that? CHARLES! Energy rocketed through your veins with the hope of rescue. Charles was here! Gazing around frantically you searched for something, ANYTHING. The only thing close by was a broom. Hopping your chair over to it depleted you immediately, every bruise and broken rib screaming out. But you had to do this. You had to get Charles’ attention. It was so much work just to get close enough to tip the broom over. CLINK! Your head snapped towards the stairs with anticipation. Charles read the list over again. “Actually a bushel of apples too.” CLINK! He glanced down at the stairs then at the clerk who laughed nervously. “Haha don’t mind that. Just some junk.” Charles hummed, grabbing a few cans off the shelf. “I’ll take these as well.” “Is that all for you?” Your heart squeezed in your chest. It didn’t work. ‘Charles! Charles I’m right here!’ You so badly wanted to scream. No words left your muffled mouth beyond your hearing. There had to be a way to get his attention. Nothing else was close enough to you and you didn’t have the strength to move yourself and the chair any further. The only thing you could do was throw yourself to the ground as hard as you could and hope for the best. BANG! This time Charles froze. His eyes napped towards the basement then back at the grocer. A terrified look flashed over the man’s face. That’s suspicious... Oh- “Just some junk, huh?” “Yes sir.” In once swift movement Charles pulled out his gun, cocking the hammer. “Then you wouldn’t mind showing me what’s down there, right?” “H-Hey listen! I don’t want any trouble.” “No trouble here. If there’s nothing down there then I’ll pay and leave.” “It’s just junk mister! Honest!” “Then it should be okay if I take a look at this ‘junk’.” The clerk folded under pressure. “They said they were gonna kill me if anyone found out!” “Then get out of here and hope they don’t find you.” Charles didn’t know who ‘they’ were but he had a pretty good idea about what was going on. He watched as the grocer fled before cautiously making his way down the stairs, cattleman revolver still drawn. Charles was stunned. All breath left his body in disbelief the second you two made eye-contact. “Y/N!” He hurdled himself towards you, picking the chair up to sit you upright before removing the gag. “What did they do to you?” Swift work was made of your binds and soon you were pulled into the comfort of his chest. Giving a whimper of pain you couldn’t help but to cry tears of relief. “Charles!” Your voice cracked. You almost thought it wouldn’t work and he would leave without you. Charles rubbed your back, pulling away to assess your injuries. “Y/N…… I-.” He didn’t know what to say. So many emotions hit him in waves, washing over him strongly which inevitably flashed across his face. Anger at the people who hurt his beloved. Guilt for not tracking you any further. Resentment towards himself for not considering you might be missing or in trouble. Sadness. So much sadness. He had never seen you this badly beaten and it disturbed him. Quickly he tried to hide his thoughts. You were so small and frail in his arms, crying uncontrollably now. Charles could imagine by your current state that it must have been a horrible ordeal. “I’ve got you. Can you walk?” All you could do was cling to Charles while shaking your head. You felt the weight of his coat drape around your shoulder before feeling yourself being scooped up. “You found me.” Charles winced at how weak your voice sounded. Placing a gentle kiss on your forehead he shushes you. “Save your energy my love. You’ve been through a lot. Let me take care of you.” It’s the least he can do after failing you so badly. As he carried you up the stairs Charles make eye-contact with Sheriff Malloy who bowed his head slightly out of respect – serving as a silent apology. “We’ll hang whoever did this.” He promised. Deputies flooded the store actively as he spoke. "When we find ‘em, you’ll be the first to know.” “Thank you.” Those words meant nothing to Charles. The Valentine law was useless and it showed. All he could do now was shield you from curious onlookers while mounting Taima with you securely in his arms. “Are you in any pain?” He whispered, making his horse walk so the ride wouldn’t jostle you too much. “Yeah.” Charles had to lean down to catch your quiet words. “Try to rest against me. I’ll get some morphine from the Reverend. Just hang in there. I’m sorry, I know it hurts.” He was trying desperately to find the right words to say. Anything that might help you or ease your suffering. Anything that might relieve his guilt. Grasping at words floating around his mind yet none could be combined into something coherent. They rode on in silence. “Mister Strauss, Reverend. We need medicine.” Most of the gang couldn’t see what was going on, Charles had you tucked protectively against him for privacy. He knew you probably didn’t want everyone ogling at you. The air of the situation was enough for everyone to gain understanding and many sprang into action. “How bad is it?” Strauss asked. “I think their ribs are broken, maybe sprained jaw. Definitely a sprained ankle.” “Bring Y/N over here.” Arthur called, leading Charles to his cot. “Probably better than the ground. Shouldn’t be movin’ much with cracked ribs.” Your eyes fluttered open the second you were placed in the comfort of Arthur’s bed. Charles immediately helped you take medicine to ease your suffering. “Do you need anything my love?” His voice was gentle as if speaking to a spooked animal. Large calloused fingers brushed the hair from your face. “Food… Water…” Arthur gently squeezed Charles’ shoulder, earning a grateful look from his friend. “Let me.” Your love settled into a chair beside you, still playing with locks of your hair. “You’re so brave Y/N. And so incredibly smart. I’m so happy you’re safe now. I-… I’ll never let this happen to you again.” He watched you struggle to stay conscious. Maybe the food will have to wait. Slumping forward, he places a feather light kiss upon your lips. “I’m coming with you everywhere for now on.” He knew you couldn’t hear him but it eased his soul just saying those words out loud.

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