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#I hope there's like videos or recordings of this somewhere..... i wanna see
haetrack · 2 months
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i just need to let this out bc i’m usually a hyuck girl but omg i’ve been obsessing over mark today… like fuck just him randomly having the horniest day of his life, so he ends up staring at the nudes u’ve send him or watching all these videos he’s recorded of u sucking him off, for HOURS. he’s just waiting around like a loser, hoping time moves faster till u come back home. eventually he can’t take it and starts palming himself over his sweats, and when that’s not enough, he slides his hand under his boxers, lightly stroking his hard cock. all he thinks about is u, the way ur lips wrap around him when ur on ur knees, the way ur back arches when he’s burrowed deep inside u. he grabs his phone immediately and facetimes u, elated when u pick up, greeting him with a small “hey” as u enter ur car. relieved that u weren’t in public, he wastes no time and picks up his pace. being able to see ur surprised face and hearing the gasp u let out upon realisation at what he was doing based off the whines leaving his mouth, just made his grip on himself so much harder and faster. mark thinks about how u whine and whimper in his ear with ur head on his shoulder, back to his chest as his fingers fuck in and out of u, his other hand applying pressure on ur clit. he almost comes when he hears u lightly breathe out “can i see, please?“. he curses under his breath and switches his camera around. he didn’t even bother taking his dick out, the shape of his hand desperately running up and down underneath his boxers and sweats was so lewd whilst still leaving much up to ur imagination. “ur doing so well baby, are u close?” u ask, “i wanna see u come, mark. i need u to take it out for me.” the deep groan that u hear from ur phone speakers makes u wanna go feral. he quickly follows ur request, his hard cock slapping against his stomach. his tip was so red and swollen, dripping with precum, making u wonder how long he’s been getting himself off for, considering u’ve never seen it this bad. the moan u accidentally let out causes him to twitch in his hand. finally without the obstruction of his clothes, u see him rutting in his hand. u feed him with praises, amazed at how much faster and louder he gets the more u talk. ur sure he’s not even listening to the actual words ur saying, just the sound of ur voice was getting him off. he opens his eyes after having them clenched the last few minutes, seeing his beautiful girlfriend’s face on his screen and noticing ur now heavy breathing, sends him over the edge. strings of cum land on his toned stomach and he catches some of it with his hand, continuing to stroke himself with it, emanating wet, sloppy sounds that bless ur ears. the groan he’s about to let out catches in his throat when he hear u say, “don’t move, i wanna clean u up.” the roar of ur car engine turning on and the facetime ending.
phew, had to put this out somewhere before i went to sleep 🧏‍♀️
holy shit. what. What
anon how could u just drop this in my inbox and go to sleep like u didn’t just write the craziest thing ever… ANON PLEASE…
just the thought of him being so horny and need you to get off… yeah. yeah. then when you get to his apartment he’d be all over you, trying to get you as close as possible. if you feel nice, you’ll let him cum as much as he needs to, grunts of your name filling the air as your hand glides over him and your mouth sucking on his tip. if you’re feeling mean, you’ll edge him, making him beg for you to let him cum, hips fucking into your fist.
even if you decide to let him fuck you, you’d ask him to beg for it. he doesn’t care, practically begging to fuck your dripping hole, no shame left in his body after being horny all day. he needs you. it doesn’t matter what position, his aching cock needs to be inside of you.
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528-hotline · 7 months
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hi angel hope ur doin well today <3 i saw ur post n i need to know ur thoughts on stepbro! gyuvin pls 🤲
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pairings | stepbro!gyuvin x stepsis!reader
warnings | stepcest, perv!gyuvin, noncon elements, voyeurism, panty stealing / sniffing, size kink
a/n 💌 OH MY GOD THEE QUEEN??? hello there AAAA thank u for requesting <3 i hope this is up to your liking heheh i hope you enjoy!
stepbro!gyuvin annoying and teasing you for having a small height for your age, but in reality he goes feral and would wanna just carry you to his room and fuck you there like his own personal fucktoy!! this guy would have a size kink i just know it!
stepbro!gyuvin stealing your used underwear and sniffing them while he jerks on it to his room. when he’s about to cum, he grabs your panties and shoots his seed directly to it. after a while, he would feel guilty and wash your panties for you :( he’ll leave it to dry somewhere in his room and puts it in your drawer when you’re not around as if nothing happened
stepbro!gyuvin jerking in front of his laptop with the pictures and video of your panties and your thighs he took secretly everytime you’re in escalator or in a jam-packed elevator when you’re wearing skirts or your uniform everytime you’re with him!!
stepbro!gyuvin installing a very small camera on eumppappa’s collar to spy on you everytime his dog comes near you. everytime you make cute little noises to his dog, and everytime the dog comes near your pretty parts such as your chest and thighs, he can’t help himself but jerk off on the recordings!! he’s kinda envy that his dog can come near you like that and he doesn’t have the guts to do so :((
one time, you heard skin slapping on gyuvin’s room, and even caught him moaning your name when you just arrived home from school. you decided to confront him after you put your things down your room and confronted him when the “noises” from his room died down.
you knocked on his room, opening it afterwards. “hey gyuv… mind if i ask you something?” you asked him, you were greeted by him playing with his phone on his bed. “hm.. what’s up?”
“d-do you like me?” you asked, he suddenly stops on playing his game, he then snickered, “psh, no? you’re my stepsister, what in the world is that question?” deep inside, gyuvin’s eager to say yes to you :(
“i heard you moan my name by the time i arrived, you sure you don’t like me?” you chuckled, and gyuvin froze at his position, this is a situation he cannot dodge, so he decided to tell you the truth and apologize. he doesn’t wanna lie to you anyway :(
“s-sorry, y/n… you see… i, uh… i sorta like you and you’re so pretty i can’t help it… and the fact you’re my stepsister is so wrong to think this way… can you forgive me?”
“if you’re really sorry… then, do you wanna help me?” you asked, lifting up your uniform skirt, to reveal your panties. the sight immediately made gyuvin’s dick twitch. this was everything he’s been dreaming of and it’s finally about to happen.
“fuck… mind helping me too then, sis?”
next thing you know, you’re bouncing on your stepbro’s cock in your skimpy little uniform :3
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my-own-walker · 7 months
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Jigsaw Falling Into Place
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Anonymous asked: Can you do some smut ab evan himself?
note: i am getting back into writing more small stories because i don't wanna get bored of the series haha. trying something a lil different
summary: in 2011, indie musician/rockstar reader has had a thing going with evan peters for a while. neither of them can stop thinking about each other. it's high time they talked it out.
warnings: sm*t, being delulu with a celeb fantasy, f1ngering, p in v, rushed plot lol
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I loved doing strange things in the name of art. Even if it meant stirring up a bit of controversy. I had my fair share of weird music videos and clothing choices that turned heads. It's what you need to do to get noticed.
My band and I received some negative press when I said some...choice words about men in an interview. Why people were shocked that the female lead singer in a band had strong feminist viewpoints was beyond me. In my time away from working, aka, hiding from the controversy, I spent time socializing.
Being in my early 20s, I felt my freedom was stifled by my schedule and record label obligations. Now that I was being forced to step away, I had time for a social life. I went to more parties and met cool people. One of which being this guy, Evan.
Although we never said it to each other, I think we both knew.
From the moment we locked eyes, I knew one thing; I wanted to know him. I'm not sure if it was him or I that moved toward the other first, but we met in the middle of the crowded room, like a fucking movie, and he said:
"You look...you look very nice. B-beautiful, I mean. Damn, why can't I speak?" He looked around bashfully, saying 'I hope no one heard that' with his eyes.
I returned the compliment with a lopsided grin and a simple, "I'm Y/N."
After a lengthy conversation off in a corner somewhere, I wrote my number down on the back of his hand and took off, fucking off back to my apartment to seem mysterious. I waited by my cellphone with bated breath, seeing if he'd follow the "three-day rule." He texted me within an hour of me leaving.
We saw each other regularly for weeks after, continuously finding reasons to hang out. I was a spellbound darling in the haze of a precious love story, fawning over a starry-eyed boy.
My desire to seem aloof and therein more appealing, though, made me act coy in his presence. I could see it in his eyes that he felt the same, but I wasn't about to make that my problem. My fear of rejection kept me from overstepping the line of friendship.
Another drunken night at a bar after seeing some indie band play left me with some bad press again. I got caught mouthing off to a photographer who was hounding me in the street. A classic story, right?
Due to that, though, I was seriously put in time-out by my label, them advising me to stay home for a while. To avoid nightlife, that is. Just until it all blew over. I sat bored in my apartment, trying to write songs when my cell phone buzzed.
E: hey!!! how are u?
you heard :/
E: yeah. bummer :^(
i'll be fine. more time to b productive!
E: what are u up to now?
about to make dinner :D
E: ooo whatcha makin?
salad!
E: make enough for 2?
I can ;)
E: what's ur address? i'm coming over
I threw my phone onto the couch and sprung into action. I had to make the space look as presentable as possible for his visit. We had known each other for about a month, but neither of us had been to each other's place.
It took him next to no time to arrive. The knock at the door announced his arrival. I physically dropped what I was doing to let him in, anxious to see him.
He stood outside my door, rosy cheeks and bleach-blonde hair making his appearance seem almost ethereal. His eyes sparkled when he saw me.
"Come in," I smiled, gesturing toward the open space of my living room.
"Wow, it's nice in here," he cooed. I parted from him to return to making dinner. I watched as he observed the space and meandered over to the sofa, flopping down a a large sigh.
"What's the matter?" I asked, laughing.
"It was an ordeal getting in, is all," he chuckled, leaning forward in his seat to peer in at me.
"Why? My doorman is rather nice..." I returned.
"No, I made sure I got in in a way that I couldn't be seen," he explained. "I know you probably don't want to get caught with a mysterious guy sneaking into your apartment,"
"And why's that, Evan?" I challenged, finishing up and heading into the living room to sit with him.
"Big news, and all," he said, bashfully. "All things considered."
"I'm not worried about it, honestly," I assured him, putting a hand on his arm. "I've found that once you've ruined your reputation, you can live quite freely."
He coughed lightly and pulled at the collar of his sweater before sitting back with his arms crossed, very obviously checking me out with a smirk on his face. I ran my hand through my hair and adjusted the way I was sitting. So many words to say, but neither of us had the courage to do so.
All at once, Evan's lips were on mine. At first, I tensed up and pulled back, then, I relaxed into it, putting a hand on his cheek. We kissed passionately, his arms eventually snaking around my waist and pulling me even closer.
"My god," he gasped, pulling away. "You're fun to kiss."
I could only reply with a bashful laugh, my cheeks burning red.
"I've been wanting to do that for a while," he exhaled.
"I've been wanting you to do that for a while," I returned, resting my hand on his chest. He looked down at the touch and back up at me with a glint in his gaze. The moment lingered, and I was spellbound in the light of his undivided attention.
"I never pictured myself getting this far. I don't know what I'm doing, quite frankly," he admitted, his brows turned up in disbelief.
I leaned forward and brushed my lips against his, pausing for a moment before giving in to the need to kiss him again. We pressed our foreheads together in the tightest embrace, this being the result of weeks of restraint.
Although we never said it to each other, I think we both knew.
His left hand threaded in my hair, his right still firmly wrapped around me, I was lit on fire. The all-consuming moment made it hard to breathe. I wanted him all at once. I wanted his very essence to touch every part of me. Every cell and fiber and bone in my being.
It mattered not what was going on in the world. The problems and the hurt and the unrest. At that moment, it wasn't our fight. Not our war. No longer a worry.
Evan was the only thing that mattered. Him.
"I need you," I murmured against his lips, grabbing the fabric of his shirt in my hands and pulling him on top of me.
It was like diving into the ocean, too swept up in the current to realize I was drowning in him. His hands were all over me. Pulling at my clothes and feeling at the glimpses of bare skin underneath.
I wanted all of it.
Just as I tugged his sweater over his head. Just as he pulled at my t-shirt. Just as I undid his belt. Just as he slid my skirt down over my knees. Just as he threw his own jeans across the room. A warmth spilled into my chest and spread outward. His presence soaked through my skin.
His lips ran up my neck and stopped next to my ear. "Okay?" he whispered.
"Yes," I breathed.
He spread my legs apart softly before lining himself up with my entrance. I moaned in his mouth when he penetrated me. He kissed me until all I could breathe was him. I ran my hands up his naked back as he found his rhythm.
I lost track of time. I was intoxicated by the heat of the moment, the warmth of his body, the waves of intense pleasure. There was something there that was real and raw and rare. We fit together like a jigsaw falling into place.
Before long, I found myself ready to succumb to the waves of pleasure. Evan must have seen it, because he paused for a moment, to say: "Not yet, beautiful." He pulled out of me and kissed me all over my body, tauntingly slow.
Then, he slid his fingers into me, setting a lazy rhythm that made my back arch and my toes curl. I existed at his very will. And all at once, after clinging desperately, I let go with a light moan. The pressure boiled over. Shudders shook me as I rested my forehead on his.
Evan's hands tightened on my waist. "Alright?" he asked, making sure he had permission to enter me again. I nodded.
He slid in. My arms were wrapped around his shoulders, my uneven breaths fanning his throat. He came with a masculine groan. The moment soaked through my skin. I could have lived in it forever.
We lay together in momentary bliss, I stroking his sweaty hair, him tracing shapes onto my arm with his finger.
"I love you," he whispered, before pausing entirely and saying a bit louder, "god, I mean, I love, holding...you."
I chuckled softly and guided his chin up to kiss me again. "You do?" I asked, curiosity getting the better of me.
"I didn't mean to say that but yeah, I think I love you," he replied bashfully.
"Well, I think I love you, too, Evan," I smiled. He hugged me tighter, inhaling deeply in the crook of my neck. "God, I forgot all about dinner," I spoke after a beat. "Are you hungry?"
"No, not for salad," he laughed. "If I'm being honest, I don’t even like it. I just lied to get to your apartment."
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DID MY BEST TO "TEXT" LIKE IT WAS 2011 FORGIVE ME!!! CRINGE!!! This was a fun one to write hope u like it and pls lmk if you do!!! (but not if you don't)
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mazeinthemiroh · 2 years
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Could you do a stray kids reaction to their gf or s/o being flirtatious with women when tipsy? Love your writing
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stray kids reaction to their s/o being drunk + flirting with women
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genre: crack!!!, hint of suggestive
word count: 0.8k
warnings: mentions of alcohol/being drunk, suggestive in seungmin's part
author's notes: thanks for the request, hope this is to your liking. have fun reading and enjoy! <3
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bangchan
he wouldn't mind it as much compared to if you flirted with a guy. idk he's the type to not be too bothered by other women because he simply doesn't compare himself to them. whereas if you were flirting with a man he might be like 'oh... is he better than me? he's more handsome than me, damn it' etc etc you get the idea. but when he catches you talking up some chic at the club he just laughs knowingly and watches on whilst drinking his own drink. he knows you're always like this when you are drunk anyways.
lee know
similarly to the previous drunk reactions, lee know would find it pretty hilarious! he would record and take videos of you flirting with another woman to show to you when you are sober. he would get you two together and be like "pose for me" as both you and the girl pull this sort of face 🤪 together. then he just sort of leaves you to it, joining his friends and pointing to you, saying "oh i've been ditched by my girlfriend for tonight, she's found her own all by herself!"
changbin
well you'd just be flirting with him and suddenly you see this beautiful girl and your face is like 😍 and his face is like 🤨 as he watches you leave him to go talk to her. he is so confused he's like??? THE AUDACITY????? totally lectures you about it on the car ride home. "y/nnnn you shouldn't be flirting with other people! not even other women! you are mine, mine only," he says with a pout. "and to think i bought all your drinks just before you went off and-" he realises you had fallen asleep during his rant.
hyunjin
hyunjin is just standing there like 'what about me?? :0' regardless of gender, he only wants you flirting with him. so when he sees you completely throwing yourself at some girl you just met he pouts and probably goes to sulk in a corner somewhere lol. when you come back to him, he gives you as much sass as he can possibly muster. "is she prettier than me then, hmm?" which would make you giggle in response before giving him a smooch on the cheek. "yeah she is actuall- NO hyunjin please come back i was only jokiinnnnnng~" "yeah whatever"
han
hannie is extremely amused as he watches you stumble up to this 10/10 woman. like, she is gorgeous. neither of you would be able to pull her. especially if you were drunk of your head. "wassup gorl, wanna d-aaddaance?" you slur your words as you talk to her, trying to remain balanced. han is fighting back tears of laughter whilst watching you get rejected for the tenth time that night. you trudge back to him, sad. "she doesn't like me" you pout. he chuckles and puts an arm around you. "well its a good thing you have a boyfriend who does."
felix
felix has both your drinks in his hands as he watches on to you dancing with some random girl. he probably ends up drinking both drinks because you guys were dancing together for a looonnnngggg time. when you come back to him, breathless and smiling and tipsy as hell, he says with a spike of jealousy "you know i could've danced with you you know?" "yeah but you don't dance like her" which just makes his jaw drop and he's like "BITCH I'M A FULL-TIME DANCER WDYM??" while you giggle like a maniac at his response.
seungmin
like if you were full-on flirting with him in public to the point where its uncomfortable, he just doesn't know what to do or say. but he would rather you be flirting with him like this rather than anyone else take his place. he's furious when he finds you getting all touchy with a girl by the bar area. "y/n what are you doing?" he asks plainly, making you retort in drunk defence, "hey, you said you didn't like me flirting with you so much and i have to have my fun so-" "if you want someone, it should be me," and with that, he takes you firmly by the wrist and leads you out of the club. he's going to have to teach you a lesson tonight.
jeongin
he's kind of a shy boy in this situation. he says hi to the pretty girl your talking to and sort of makes eyes at you that screams 'what are you doing' but he never actually does anything. partly because he doesn't want to spoil your fun and partly because he is lowkey intimidated by the beautiful woman you are now with. he just keeps to himself for the night, or hangs with his friends, but he will glance at you from time to time just to make sure you're ok.
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12-seconds-to-live · 1 year
Text
Pierre Gasly’s Farewell
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“Are you sure about this?” I asked to Kika and Pierre’s parents, almost shaking, feeling hopeless ‘cause I’ve been crying no stop till yesterday morning, since he’s gone.
“He would like that, even if he was with me, you were his favourite person, even more tan Charles. Everybody notice that” said Kika. I looked at her. She was as me, broken. Pierre’s dad noded in the back of my motorhome.
“He was waiting for the song, he told me that it was going to be a surprise?”
“Yeah, it’s just…the song is ok but in the end I put my favourite memory with him” I put my hands on my fase avoiding to cry again “I’m so grateful that he helped me all the road to be here with him in F1 so in the video there’s the moment that I feel all right to share with the fans”.
“He is happy, don’t doubt it” Pierre’s mom hug me. It didn’t feel ok but I was going to sing it. Don’t get me wrong, as being the only child of my parents and be away from home, Pierre feel like I was his little sister and he always been for me and for the 2023 season, his seat in Alpha Tauri is mine, thanks to him, for help me and be give me his shoulder every time I feel like I wanted to give up.
I took Kika’s hand and exited my motorhome. His helmet was in the middle of the pitlane, the other 18 drivers were there and above us there’s a screen when everybody was going to watch the video. “He’s going to be looking for us from heaven and thank you” said Kika
“I don’t wanna cry anymore” I whisper. I walked in front of his helmet, I looked at Charles, Yuki, Max, they were looking to the floor, unable to see his helmet. Lewis was beside me and took my hand.
“You always were so closed and with you here, his spirit is going to keep in you. You’re going to feel sad because he’s not present, you’re not going to hear his voice but remember all the good memories, his words to you before every race” I could feel my eyes watery again “He’s proud of you y/n, never forget that”
“Thank you Lewis”
“Can I introduced you? Take a breath before the song” I smiled to him
“Yeah, that would be lovely, thanks” He smiled and get closed to the microphone
“May I get your attention, please? Yesterday an important member of our family passed away. We know how risky this sport is but at the same time we know what we do and the reasons that put us in a certain situations that sometimes we can’t avoid and as many of us in our carrees, we ge tinto the wall or well, the wrost. Pierre’s still one of us and his best friend is going to show us what was to be his gift”
I get in front of the microphone, I feel nervous and the boys hugs between each other waiting for me “This is for my best friend and I hoped that wherever he is right now he could see how grateful I am and how much I’m gonna miss him and… now he’s gonna be with Anthoine who I missed too. Hope you liked the song”
“Will you forgive me for what I've missed?
It's been two years now
You're already ten
Almost eleven
Are your eyes sky blue or navy blue?
I don't know what you like
Whether you prefer races
Spaceships or sailing ships
If you live calmly or live with war
If you're falling in love or still fighting
If you feel warmth, you feel it on the inside
It's because there's an angel
Burning in your chest
If in your heart, you're no longer cold
It's because there's an angel, the one that I sent you”
 “You're always quiet like the grown-ups
I'm gonna tell you without ornaments or flowers
And I have to be where I don't want to be
This isn't "El Mal Querer", it's bad desire
I'm somewhere I wouldn't take you
No one's at peace here between stars and needles
Marble stars cut into the floors
Foilies all over the streets where models stroll
You might also like”
 “Tracks on the arms
Points on the stars
I don't wanna bring you
So you'll never come
Points on the stars
Tracks on the arms
They hold tight when it's cold
The same way I hug you”
As the instrumental break came the outro of the song and the video appears on the screen. It was a recording of a very smiley Pierre with a blue sweater. The video he send the day that my seat in F1 was announced.
[Outro]
“Good morning, kiddo
I can’t believed that everybody is so happy for you, celebrating and you’re sleeping, it’s 11 a.m
I like that... another liked by Pierre Gasly has been taking place on every instagram post where I saw your silly face
I’m so proud and not only because I’m the friend you would ever have but you know, I’m gonna try to keep the seat warm for you, the one who can’t tolerate cold weather but has an apartment in London, cute
As a friend, I’m proud of you and as a brother I can’t believe that you and I are going to be Racing together and enjoying all the circuits
Always remember to keep humble and keep on your head that you and your family goes in the first place
And if one day you feel that you have everything and your career as a driver has been so successfull, you can come to me and yeah, watch how near the sky is at that point
But now, this is just the beggining
When I look at it I think “What a complicated world is the one y/n and I have gotten into” it’s deffinitely worth it
See you in Austin, F2 champ and soon F1 champ
But well, if you’re happy, I’m happy as well
Love you”
The video ends showing his smile and with that everybody is clapping to celebrate his life, how loved he is and still be. I walked to his helmet and hug it. I’m not going to run into him again but in my head his memory is going to keep alive, my greatest lost friend, I marked his goodbye with this last song I wrote.
“I’m not letting you go Pierre so see you in another lifetime, I missed you already”
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In a Heartbeat
Part 1: Ballistic
Masterlist
Final installment to the Ballistic Series. I’ve enjoyed this journey and I hope you guys have too
Cheerleader!Harrington!Reader
Fluff. Smut. Pregnancy. Everything is okay now. You and Eddie have graduated. You still live in Hawkins. Breeding Kink. Mentions of Eddie having a very slight pregnancy kink but its mostly only pregnant you. Unprotected p in v sex (be safe, babes). Mentions of labor.
After getting back from the beach, things were difficult for a little longer, but thankfully, by the time graduation came around, you were feeling better, thanks to your friends, you’d tried to go to a therapist but they weren’t understanding enough, so you talked to your friends and Eddie whenever you were struggling, and it helped a lot since they understood where you were coming from, even if they didn’t always understand how you felt.
You and Eddie got a place together after graduation, a simple trailer on the nicer side of town, which Eddie was happy to do, excited to live somewhere where all the outlets work. As some who lives in a trailer this is a genuine and common problem. With your trust fund you and Eddie wouldn’t have to work, so you decided for a while you wouldn’t. Everyone spent a lot of time either at Family Video bothering Robin and Steve, who surprisingly wanted to keep working rather than split your trust fund, no matter how often you prodded he just wouldn’t give. When Robin and Steve were off of work, they piled into yours and Eddie’s trailer, interrupting some very personal moments more than once.
“Oh my god! In the kitchen?! Really?!” “This is our home! Who bursts in with knocking?!” “Who screws with the door unlocked?!” “We just got home! It just happened!” “OH MY GOD!”
Despite their… heavy lack of respect for privacy, you loved them all very much.. but right now… Eddie really wished they would all just go the fuck away.
You were at Skull Rock, you cuddled up underneath it with Eddie, Dustin off to the side. You weren't really listening what they were talking about, too focused on playing the edge of Eddie's Hellfire shirt, which the group had remade for him after he was out of the hospital, since his other one had been ruined.
Eddie was thumbing the ring box in his pocket nervously, unbeknownst to you he'd been saving up from his drug deals to get you a ring, and had even applied to the record store when he'd been walking back with it.
He'd had a whole elaborate speech planned out, of course he did, he was Eddie fucking Munson, the most theatrical person in Hawkins, and you absolutely loved him for it.
Deciding he couldn't wait any longer, he gently pulled away from you, winking at you when you frowned. "Where ya going?" You asked softly. "Nowhere." Eddie pulled you to stand, and when he started to get on his knee your eyes widened. "Eds-"
"OH MY GOD!" Dustin stood up quickly. "is he?" "Oh my god he is." "Wow." "Aww." rreactions echoed from your friends before Eddie even pulled the box out of his pocket, when he finally did pull it out, Dustin scared the birds.
Inside the box was a simple, skinny gold band, and rather than having one big diamond, the top of it had three small ones, if you looked close you could see a design engaved along the band. "Eddie..." You whispered softly.
"Sh. You're gonna make my brain short circuit." Eddie chuckled, clearing his throat. "i uh... I know it hasn't been long, like a year and a half.. but I've been through enough shit to know that uh.. I'm like positive I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. So... what do you say? Y/N Harrington, will you marry me?" He had the widest nervous grin on his face, and you couldn't help but laugh softly, nodding quickly. "Yes. Obviously, silly boy." You hld your hand out to him, watching as he slid the ring on your finger before he stood up and wrapped you in his arms, kissing you deeply.
Dustin was jumping around and screaming, celebrating with Max and Robin. Everyone else congratulated you, Steve giving you both a big hug and proceeding to tell Eddie not to fuck it up. Max was blind now, though you all expected that, she was only alive because of El, and surprisingly made a fast physical recovery, but she was still having trouble adjusting to being blind.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
You and Eddie left skull rock immediately, on the drive back to your trailer you could barely keep your hands off of eachother, when you were inside he had you against the door the second it was closed, tearing your clothes off as the two of you stumbled to your bedroom, giggling when he got frustrated with your bra, reaching back to undo it for him before sliding it off your shoulders and dropping it to the side.
“God… you are gorgeous.” Eddie mumbled before he was basically tackling you to the bed, covering you in kisses as you squealed. “Eddie!” You laughed, feeling his fingers start to tickle lightly at your sides.
Eddie grinned into your neck, letting his fingers stop before they slid over you, ghosting up your sides before sliding down to grip your thighs as he kissed you, his hands kneeding the soft flesh.
"Eddie.." you moaned, your thighs were always a weak spot for you, Eddie knew and used it to his advantage whenever he could, which was basically any time you were in the same room together.
It felt like a million years before Eddie finally started to drift lower, you were completely naked by now, anything that wasn't your bra strewn like a path to your bedroom, Eddie now only wearing his boxers, which you desperately wanted needed him out of.
Before you could say anything, though, Eddie was diving in between your legs like he was starving, starting with eager but perfect, precise licks through your folds before he'd set the tip of his tongue against your clit, circling the sensitive bud. "Fuck.. always taste so good." Eddie mumbled before he was diving back in again, his hands gripping your thighs as his eyes closed.
"Jesus Christ.." you moaned happily and rocked up against his mouth as you whined, tangling your fingers in his hair and tugging gently, a grin spreading across your face when you felt more than heard him moan against you before he brought one hand off your thigh to ease two fingers into you, still focused on suck and licking your clit, mumbling out different praises that were muffled against you and sent vibrations through almost your entire body. "Eddie~" you whimpered happily, back arching as you shuddered, breathing heavily and chewing on your lip.
"Always so responsive, Bunny." Eddie pulled back for a moment to speak before he was diving back in, eyes closing once more. He could stay like this for hours, you're sure, if you ever let him, of course you were always more eager to have him inside you, so you'd always pul him away from his agenda. Tonight, though, when you gripped his hair and tried to tug him up to kiss you, he whined and stayed planted where he was, gripping your thighs tighter, pulling them closer to keep himself caged in, gazing at you over your mons.
You gazed down at him, of course you did, how could you not? "Look so pretty, Eds." You whined happily, reaching down to grab the wrist that was holding your thigh as his other hand slid down and two fingers circled your hole slowly before easing in, your slick combined with his spit providing more than enough lubrication.
You sucked in a breath and moaned as your back arched a little bit. "Eds~ please~" you moaned, your head falling back and your eyes closing as he slowly thrusted his fingers into you, lapping and sucking lightly on your clit. "We've been interrupted nonstop for the past month." Eddie mumbled, pulling away from your clit with a soft pop. "I'm making you cum at least once before I fuck you. So you're gonna have to be patient up there, Bunny." He shook his head and went back to sucking and licking your clit, fucking you harder with his fingers, pushing his fingers as deep into you as he could, crooking his fingers to massage that little spongey spot inside you, just enough for the knot to start building and keep you just on the edge of it.
Your legs started trembling, he had you right on the edge, the sounds of your moans mixing with Eddie's muffled ones, and the obscene squelching as he pushed a third finger into you and going back to thrusting his fingers inside you. When he added the third finger he finally started to put more pressure against your gspot, massaging it in a come-hither motion. "E-Eddie~" you moaned louder, your back arching as you dug your heel into his back gently, your other leg stretching out. "Go ahead, Bunny." Eddie purred against you, sucking harder on your clit as he added more pressure to your gspot. "Cum for me and I'll give you what you really want." "Y-You promise?" You whined, dropping your head back as you shuddered. Eddie had gotten into the habit of teasing you once you'd gotten back into the groove again, stretching out his foreplay and even lying about how many orgasms he'd give you before fucking you.
Eddie cooed lightly against you before pulling off with a pop, replacing his mouth with his thumb, rubbing your clit good enough that it made up for the lack of his tongue. "I promise." He purred, bringing his free hand up to brush some flyaways off your forehead. "Cum for me, pretty girl." He purred, pressing kisses along your neck and collarbone. You whimpered happily and turned your face to bury in his hair, gasping and moaning loudly as you started to cum, grabbing Eddie's arm as your legs started to tremble again. "Fuuuuuuck." you whimpered.
"Ohh, good girl." Eddie purred as you creamed around his fingers, chuckling fondly. "so easy to get you to do it." He teased as you hit his shoulder weakly. When he didn't stop the movment of his hand, or make any move to pull himself out of his boxers, you whimpered. "No- no, Eds, you promised." You whined, shifting needily as you looked up at him.
Eddie chuckled softly. "Oh, calm down." Eddie purred, reaching and pushing his boxers down. "I got you." He cooed, sliding his fingers out of you and grasping his cock, sliding your cum over the length of his cock before sliding his tip through your folds slowly. "You're just so pretty when I tease you a little." He whispered, running his thumb over your cheek before kissing you as he eased into you, the two of you moaning happily as your eyes fluttered "Fuck.. you always feel so good, baby." He sucked on your neck lightly as he pulled all the way to the hilt, nuzzled deep inside you as he took a deep breath.
"You do too, Eds. Always." You whimpered happily, looking up at Eddie, his hips grinding into you, but not quite pulling out yet. The movement was pulling the sweetest sounds your mouth, Eddie was practically melting against you, his face was nuzzled in your neck, one hand holding the other side of your neck as the other slid up your arm and into your hand, you didn't know when he wiped his hand off, but you were glad he did as your fingers laced together.
When he finally started to actually thrust, it was long, slow drags of his hips, pushed as deep inside you as he could. "What... are you trying to do... Eds?" You moaned and arched your back against him. "G-get me pregnant or something?" You teased, wrapping your legs around him, though as soon as the thought popped into your head, you wanted nothing more, and judging by the whimpering sound Eddie made in response, he felt the same way.
"What if I said yes?" He whispered, leaning back a bit, pushing deeper into you and staying still. "What if I wanna keep you full of little Eddies?" He hummed, nudging his nose against yours. You shuddered at the idea. "I'd say you better get started." You moaned, grinding your hips as your eyelids fluttered closed.
Eddie practically mewled like a kitten when you said, immediately starting to rock back into you, nuzzling his face into your neck and whining happily. "Can't wait to have you full." He purred softly. "You're gonna be so pretty, Bunny. Round and glowing." He pressed his forehead against yours gently, your breath mixing together as you both panted softly. "Y-you really think?" You whispered softly, sentence ending with a soft moan when he grazed you gspot. "Oh yeah." Eddie cooed, gazing down at you with so much love in his eyes you thought you were gonna explode. "Gonna look so pretty." He whined happily.
You loved when Eddie got whiney, it always made you feel extremely confident. You could take this extravagant, out-of-the-box, eccentric man and turn him into a whiney mess with just a few words.
"D-do it, Eds." You moaned happily. "Fill me up. As many times as you want. Only wanna have your babies." You whimpered, wrapping your arms around him tighter. He groaned happily and started snapping his hips into yours, reaching down to rub your clit in slow circles. "You first, baby. Cum for me and I'll fill you up good." He purred, nudging his nose against yours as he rubbed your clit. With you already being sensitive from cumming once it didnt take much longer for you to cum again, moaning loudly as your back arched and your nails dug into his back.
Eddie moaned happily into your neck and thrusted harder into you, losing his rhythm a bit before he was cumming hard, groaning loudly into your neck as his muscles trembled under your fingertips, his hips pushed deeply inside you, cumming deep inside you. "Fuck... you're gonna be so pretty and full." He purred, covering you in kisses as you blushed deeply, hugging him tightly and giggling softly.
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You and Eddie decided that although you didn't want a big wedding, you still wanted a ceremony, as soon as possible, which made it difficult to find an officiant for the wedding. Eddie's remaining reputation didn't help, of course, and you didn't want to get married in a courthouse.
You'd been freaking out about this when Steve surprised you, laying a certain in front of you in the living room of yours and Eddie's trailer, stating that Steve had become an officiant. Your tears, rather than subsided, had gotten worse, now turning from sad cries to happy ones, you threw your arms around him.
And now, here you were, walking down the small aisle, wlaking towards a tearing up Eddie, a barely visible bump trying to show in the white dress Joyce had given you, having bought it as soon as Dustin called Will to tell him that the two of you were getting married. It fit you perfectly both style and size wise. You don't think Eddie'd noticed yet, Hell, you had just noticed yourself, you'd just thought your late period was just that- a late period. You figured the morning sickness was just some kind of funky flu or something, the test you'd sent Joyce out to get earlier said otherwise, and so did the other one in the box.
Ever since you and Eddie had talked about it while having sex, Eddie could barely shut up about it, telling you that as long as you were okay with it he was gonna try and get you pregnant until you got pregnant, and how could you say no when he was giving you the sweetest, most vulnerable look you'd ever seen? You were more than happy to have Eddie's babies, you were just glad you'd gotten a trailer with a spare bedroom, which you were using for when the gang would sleep over, but now, it was going to be a nursery.
Eddie, of course, had noticed a few things different about you, your skin was softer, and brighter, your eyes were brighter as well, your lips were pinker and your cheeks always had this rosey tint that he knew didn't come from any kind of make up you wore. He couldn't quite place what it was, but he was falling in love with you even more. As he watched you walk down the aisle, his eyes welled with tears as Steve set a hand on his shoulder and gave it a light squeeze, Dustin, who was his best man, doing the same on his other side.
"You look... amazing." Eddie whispered once you made it in front of him, your lips spreading into a sheepish smile. "You don't look so bad, yourself." You teased. He'd ditched his ripped jeans for a pair of new black jeans, paired with a black button up, a white bowtie, and a black suede blazer, the bushiness in his hair tamed for the occasion. He grinned and looked at himself, and then back at you. "Well, thank you." He hummed happily.
The set up was simple, an arch Hopper had built, decorated with flowers that the younger ones of the group collected, that honestly surprised you a bit, especially considering it was Eddie's idea, exclaiming his girl would only have the freshest, most clean flowers for her only wedding, a statement to which you giggled at but agreed with.
"Alright, Harrington. Let's get this show on the road." Eddie smirked at Steve before taking your hands, everyone else laughing. Your parents weren't there, but you didn't care much, everyone that meant something to you was there, and that was all you needed.
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Eddie had the exact reaction that you thought he'd have, he'd immediately hopped onto his feet and starting hopping around the tiny reception giggling like crazy. He'd immediately ran to the mike, interrupting the band as he pointed at you.
"I'm gonna be a daddy!!!!" He shouted into the microphone. Dustin screamed, Steve looked.. slightly protified at the prospect of you having sex, even though he'd caught you multple times because he couldn't knock without immediately opening the door.
Jeff, and Gareth shouted. "Munson! Munson! Munson!" over and over, Eddie nodding along with them excitedly as he made his way over to you, wrapping his arms around you and kissing you deeply. "One Hell of a wedding present." He cooed.
"Just wait until we get home." You smirked, winking at him as his eyes wideed and his pupils expanded. "Yeah?" "Oh yeah." "Well, now I'm excited." You laughed and shook your head fondly before nuzzling his neck.
Throughout the whole pregnancy Eddie could barely keep his hands to himself, he was always touching you, appropriately if you were around people, inappropriately if you weren't, he made you cum at the very least twice a day, even if it was just with his fingers or his tongue to help reliev some tension. It was always followed by an amazing shoulder and foot rub before he would send you off to sleep talking to your ever-growing stomach.
When you went into labor, Eddie had been prepared, for the whole nine months... and then the baby decided to come, and all his preparedness flew out the window and he was calling Steve. "SHE'S COMING, MAN!!" "Eddie? it's like three am. What are you- Who's- SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THE PHONE WITH ME?!" It took Steve's brain a second to catch up "I CAN'T FIND THE KEYS, MAN! I CAN'T FIND THE KEYS!" "Oh for fuck- I'M COMING! BE OUTSIDE!"
Steve pulled up in record time, opening the door and putting your and Eddie's bags in the trunk as Eddie helped you get in the back, climbing in directly beside you and closing the door. Steve got in and sped to the hospital.
When the doctor asked how far apart your contractions were and you said that they weren't, like at all, they rushed to get you ready for delivery, letting Steve and Eddie stay when you asked, Eddie had been by your side, Steve a little more hesitant, but when you reached for him, he was practically tripping to comfort his sister, not looking anywhere other than your eyes, pulling your hand up for you while Eddie fanned you.
It didn't take long for little Vera Munson to come out, coming out with already thick curly hair, and blue eyes that turned brown when she turned six months old, a perfect copy of Eddie but with your nose.
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Eddie and Vera were practically inseparable, and as she grew up you moved out of your trailer into a bigger, nicer home that you continued to fill with little babies that absolutely adored their metalhead father, Vera effectively breaking a kids nose in first grade when he told her that his dad said her dad was a freak, eventually no one said anything about Eddie anymore, knowing one of his many, many children could be hiding around the corner, ready to punch first and ask questions later, you and Eddie couldn't be more proud of them.
You didn't expect Eddie Munson to be the love of your life, you definitely didn't expect to have eight kids for him, the youngest four being sets of twins, the man was relentless, getting you pregnant every time you turned a corner, but you didn't mind, each and everyone one of your little spawn was absolutely wonderful. You were completely cotent with where you were, and you had to do it all over again to get here, you absolutely would, in a heartbeat.
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Tag list:
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nochi-quinn · 1 year
Text
legend of vox machina watch party episodes 1-3: billfrito
why does all the amazon lovm merch look SO BAD
let laura bailey run your merch department amazon
amazon merch: focus-tested, advertiser friendly, bland
cr official merch: laura bailey wanted a thing so she made it, superior, personal
matt: I play The Entire Rest Of The World
are they already drunk or just goofy
the eternal question
"tall and lovely" literally nobody remembers sam is tall
djfskj he matches the sofa
GILMORE-SCENTED
oh HE'S already drunk
"that's five more trinkets than ever appear in the show"
travis in the calamity merch
aw, but mica's speech
I have absolutely forgotten how to use the watch party
oh right I don't get video until twitch says I get video
EPISODE ONE
"what could go wrong"
"I don't know what that means"
see, even this has better quality than the actual prime video player
"everybody be quiet I'm talking"
75k?!
I mean it makes sense but also that's A Number
"it's sleeping gas"
Nickelodeon Presents Legend of Vox Machina
WIZARDS
well she's a sorceror but WIZARDS
I was really hoping liam would be in this one but I'm beginning to understand why he's not
can you imagine
mb next time for maximum trauma
"that was my child" "sam's kids die all the time in this show"
"and then this happens"
THORDAK
I didn't notice the lens flare in the city shot beforeeeeee
"I don't wanna say yes until I know what happens" that's amazing
"don't let your shop fall on you next time"
"freak-ass"
I love that travis watches the reaction videos
"we should get rid of that"
Just A Broom™
"if the spork doesn't work you have no choice"
"no horses were harmed"
oh WOW
give them all raises
animation should win cinematography
Sam's Kids Watch
I still regret the loss of Kiki's friendship with the Sun Tree
s a m
"and it makes for really great desktop wallpapers"
"buildings were still…up"
"when I did it in their imaginations"
OH SHIT I want THAT for a wallpaper
these are fucking gorgeous
FLORIDA DRAGON
"I'm from there, I can say that"
I enjoy so much that matt has just leaned into wearing comfy pants to every event
jesus
the scrawlings of a madman
Big Dragon is Big
mica
who is that skinny motherfucker
THERE'S gilmore
I don't know who that other guy was. dark gilmore.
skinny gilmore isn't real, he can't hurt you
"I'm dying, show me your tits"
ahhh sketchy thordak
"big mistake giving sunil a catchphrase"
"remember when TVs had dials? I don't, I wasn't alive then"
travis is already in despair
y'all know what you were getting into when you let her host again
did travis just go "have fun storming the castle"
EPISODE TWO
it is nice to hear dani
"the internet is still just a concept"
will!!
the persistence of my crush on will friedle is astounding
ABC's TGIF veterans sound off
"someone had to design this!"
Ethereal Butt Scoops
will
"you're in this one!" "I know, I've heard"
Australian Accent Guy
I have not sat down and tried to hear the main cast in the background yet
there you go, it was Caduceus, but not For Real Caduceus, just Easter Egg Caduceus
"the armor looks a lot like Kima's armor!" "yeah, imagine that"
"we had to change it, the first take she was watching The Boys"
She
"if you put a backwards hat on [kashaw] it would fit"
He
STABBY WHEELCHAIR
memelords
matTHEW
josh turner, she's talking about josh turner
spoilers will
I love that they get to record together again but I
will's first ever animated swear!
terry deserved to swear lbr
"that was horrible" "it was fun!"
he's just so proud of himself. and so wrong.
"okay byeeee"
ONE PERSON did all of this?!
osysa's facial animation is so fucking good
sassy arrogant woman on sassy arrogant woman violence
memelords
victor!
taliesin just sneezed somewhere
Bill Frito
ART
aww, them coming up with story for kash and zahra just 'cause they could
OSYSA CONCEPT ART
why is there an audio desync when I have my headset off but not with it on
I'm unfortunately having to use this as a break to check on my kid
I desperately need Victor Award Speech
I don't even care if it's just a Victor Laugh at the end. I need this.
I Saw Green Once
"oh he's a dick!"
"you really crafted the perfect fuckboi"
ANIMATED CALAMITY???
MATT IF IT'S ANIMATED CALAMITY YOU HAVE TO TELL ME OTHERWISE IT'S ENTRAPMENT
"please get out"
I need my kid's pancreas to quit fucking up so I can put my headset back on, I missing so much crosstalk orz
DANI CARR 👏👏👏
it ain't called chaos couch for nothin
professionalism, we don't know her
"no we got a few more bits"
will did you not catch my TGIF shoutout earlier, I absolutely remember dial-up
EPISODE THREE
"that's the head of the CCP" M A T T H E W
justice for dexter the cute dragon
Skipping the Intro Is A War Crime
"who did that? I hope he's awesome" "yeah about that"
"tieflings are so cool" "just tieflings, not that other asshole"
will's shirt is doing an optical illusion on the picture in picture
"like taking the laugh track out of mash" that's a really good analogy actually
forever in awe of travis' ability to hit that pitch
I changed my twitter name to 'do not go far from me' bc I chose violence
[psychonauts 1 voice] YOU, tree-sitter!
I still cannot hear troy baker here, I am ashamed of myself
"he's a bit of an ass, you've got this"
"complete with traps" "SPOILERS"
I do love zahra's face there
"this is just travis as a player" noted Big Red Button addict travis willingham
"stay away from her! get a job!" dslkfjls
I wondered how much of this was or wasn't from kith and kin, I haven't had the chance to read it
I'm absolutely in awe of foley artists
I always felt like travis was living vicariously through grog with the beard, since he had to shave his for mocap work at the time
"I think your beard is evil!"
"'cause mary sucks in real life and I'm the nice one"
"there's never a time when they just turn around and go home" this is why Campfire Cooking In Another World is excellent, the protagonist is just like "no 🥰"
still in love with vex's little ear twitch
the way they all just went SILENT
"I don't wanna cry on national television"
you are not immune to liam o'brien
"you spelled my name 'troy baker'"
nope, no pokeball yet
(they are definitely not allowed to call it a pokeball) (I am under no such restrictions)
"that was definitely on purpose"
"we should finish those episodes"
"JUST MAKE THIS ONE BLACK AND WHITE"
I'm torn btwn "ha ha funny d&d wife jokes" and "that's actually important to communicate before it has the CHANCE to be a problem"
oh SHIT this concept art
"control water moses style"
"the damned missionaries showed up"
"their dicks are teeth"
NOT THE XENOMORPH
"do not make fanart of that"
matt if you get to say that out loud fcg gets to have a flesh tongue
"hashtag - " "NO"
grog and bacon edge was a+
that time he made scanlan drown out him in the outhouse so he could talk to it
"oh no we all share one brain cell, this is horrible"
matt say the names out loud before you get to the table, I've been saying this for years
CR 13 Pedobear
"obsessed with that" "you should not be"
"I showed these episodes to my kids" sam no
Dark is Not Evil
oh right kestrel came up with marisha's space frog
"we're gonna show up and talk behind you"
the episodes drop three hours before critrole for me, rip my thursday nights
drop the video will. will drop the video. will.
"I UNDERSTAND THAT REFERENCE"
"iono" "MATTHEW"
OH THE NECKLACE
them threatening matt until he picks a voice to do
"WHO'S SCRATCH KASH"
their dream guest stars have a habit of just being their guest stars
Bill Frito Can Do Anything
mica are you talking abo - you're talking about your dad
"I cannot do that."
ROBBIE
I miss him
that's right, will nuked all his socials
(good for him)
"you can" "get fucked"
mica just going "END"
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calamitaswrath · 2 months
Text
Just writing down some thoughts to gather them
I dunno, recently my whole gender questioning has just really been going off the rails. On the one hand, I still don't truly believe that I'm a woman because I don't really want anything that (I think) hrt or surgery would do with my body. What I mean is, I'm fine my current genitals, and don't want breasts, but I'm near certain that hrt and the like would have more effects than just those. And of course there's still all those "what if I'm faking it" doubts, which. . . from what I gather, are also very frequent with other trans or enby people. Another doubt I keep coming back to is that the person I still have feelings for once told me that while they're (not the person's actual pronouns, but just to keep the mention of them more nonspecific, because that whole thing is not the point here) bi, they would currently be more interested in having a relationship with a woman next, so I my thoughts keep circling back to the idea that I'm faking this all to myself in the hopes that it would help me with them. But that's a point I can at least easily dismiss, even if I keep coming back to it.
But then the other hand, I keep trying to tell myself that all these thoughts and doubts are recent, but. . . are they? I haven't actually gone swimming in years, even though I loved to do it as a pre-pubescent child, and I generally really don't like other people seeing me topless, even though it would be acceptable as an amab person. When my beard growth started, I was in denial for the longest time, to the point where I tossed a razor I was gifted into a corner somewhere and never touched it since, and on the whole was super pissed about the present. These days, I shave my face daily, because I really don't want even a single hair there. I also used to think that I hate being called a man or the like because I just fundamentally unprepared for being an adult, but. . . idk, I guess that's still part of it, but I'm also super certain by now that I'm just not a man. And even now, I loathe being called one, but almost never speak out against it, because that's a conversation that I'm just not comfortable with having with anyone irl outside of university. Whenever I hear my own voice in recordings or become aware of it, I just feel distant from it, like it doesn't really fit. For some time, I had bookmarked a video along the lines of "Feminize your voice", which I kept telling myself was just me wanting to improve my vocal range. But. . . was that really it? I ended up deleting the bookmark some while ago apparently, because I never got to it, and now I'm lowkey beating myself up over it. I guess I've also always had a bit of a fascination with the concept of genderswaps, or genderbending? I really liked Ranma 1/2 as a kid, and when I realized that Xenoblade X lets you re-customize your Cross after the start of the game, including gender, I really was all over that. And somehow ended up playing with a male avatar far, far less than I did with a female one. My whole gender questioning began with Arval Fire Emblem. But even though they're still peak gender, I think they're meant to be amab, and didn't shake my own self-view nearly as much A Xenoblade. . . who's afab(-ish), and feminine presenting. I keep asking myself what I want for myself in terms of my presentation, and I just keep coming back to more feminine ways being more appealing to me. I wouldn't even mind wearing skirts (maybe I could microdose by getting a kilt, lol), I feel. I've also already told a few people I interact more commonly with that I wanna give the name Lucia a try, and have already been called that a few times, which always just gives me a jolt in my chest - like, in a good way.
And then there's still the part that considering this trajectory of my own self-view and gender identity, it might not even be wrong to call myself a lesbian, which. . . that thought still gets me all ???, and I'm not really ready yet to interrogate that.
I also rewatched the video that Abigail Thorn of Philosophy Tube made about her coming out and decision to transition, and. . . well, for the most part, the experiences that she talked about I think didn't feel they matched my own. But one thing she mentioned in there, about a feeling of having your whole being, your identity, everything you believed to be true about yourself coming apart. . . that definitely hit.
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arileartist · 1 year
Text
   Free! Characters protecting their s/o from creeps/bullies part 2-Natsuya, Ikuya, Kisumi~
Enjoy❤️
 Natsuya Kirishima
(You and Natsuya are in a train, packed with passengers. You didn't realise that you were separated from him by a few feet, though he was still close enough for you to make eye contact with him every now and then, however…something odd seems to be happening..)
Y/n:(scrolling through your phone) *hmmm why do I feel like I'm being watched in a weird way…. I hope Natsuya is keeping an eye on me… …I don't feel safe here…*
Natsuya: (glancing over at you)*winks*
Y/n:(smiling at him and nodding your head)
(Suddenly, you feel a cold hand on you)
Creep: (starts touching you from behind, lingering her slender fingers over your waist)
Y/n: ( clutching your bag and putting your phone inside) *what the- that's a woman behind me isn't it?? Did she accidentally touch me-*
Natsuya:(notices something's up as a horrid expression paints your face)
Creep: (slides her hands into your shirt and feels up your stomach) hehehe~
Y/n:(shifting away) Ma'am I'm gonna need you to stop what you're doing-
(The people around you stare at you two, and Natsuya tries to push through the crowd and get close to you)
Creep: Oh dear, I was trying to fix your clothing~ you know, it was coming out from behind hahaha! Don't you worry~
Y/n: sure..(gives Natsuya a helpless look)
Natsuya: (immediate takes out his phone and secretly starts recording you two) *hang in there y/n*
Creep: (starts to touch you again, this time going below your stomach and touching your private areas) How lustful~
Y/n: (trying to move away, but she has a firm hold on your waist) *Ugh! I can't break free! Can't even do anything otherwise people are gonna act like I'm the one being weird*
Creep: (starts to take out something from her bag) this will sure come in handy today~
Natsuya: (eyes widening, takes a few pictures and immediately pushes through the crowd and grabs your arm, pulling you free from the woman's grasp) y/n!!
(Once again, the crowd stares at you three)
Natsuya: Ma'am that was assault, you do realise that you're touching him inappropriately?
Y/n: (hugging Natsuya's arm) I tried to break free but she wouldn't let me-
Creep: Oh how injust! Everyone here can clearly see that you two are blaming me to get money off of me. Why would I do anything of the sort? Do I look like one of those people?
(People around start muttering and giving you suspicious looks)
Y/n: (looking at Natsuya, eyes filled with rage) Natsu, got any ideas?
Natsuya: (caressing your hair) I'll take care of it, don't worry.
Creep: (giving you two a petrified stare)Look at them! Such filth! Do you two honestly think you're even doing the right thing? 
Natsuya: (ticked off, takes out his phone and plays the clips in front of everyone) Oh yeah? You think we're the filthy ones for protecting each other from the likes of someone who does things like THESE on public transport?? If you have any shame, you'd leave this place. I do not want you coming in our vicinity again!
Creep: what the-! That's not true-
Y/n: what do you mean "not true"?? You were literally touching me in places you shouldn't, I don't even know you!!
(A wave of gasps fill the air as the crowd now eyes the woman. A couple of ladies come ahead and grab her, dragging her away as she screams insults and later, the ticket collector puts her into the staff's custody. Natsuya sends him the videos as proof and gives him his number, in case the cops would ask. Some time later, The crowd on the train settles back down and some of the people even try to comfort you)
Natsuya: Alright there's our stop. Let's go y/n!
Y/n: yes, coming!
Y/n: (Deboarding) thank you everyone who was there for us, we're both grateful for you guys
Natsuya: (kissing your forehead) Hey, thankful little cupcake, Wanna go somewhere to cheer you up?
Y/n: (punching his shoulder lightly)I just want to stay in your arms right now…where I feel safe
Natsuya: hehehe~ Netflix and chill it is then~
Y/n: (moans softly, burying your face into Natsuya's arm)
(The rest of the afternoon was spent with Natsuya filling your day with comfort, lots of love and food, and he stayed over at your place at night,  just to look after you)
Kisumi Shigino
(You two are having a fun date at an amusement park, when you notice a girl staring at your boyfriend. You get a bad feeling about her. She makes eye contact and she starts walking up to you)
Y/n: (holding Kisumi's hand tightly, tugging at him) Kisumi…Karen incoming, 6 o'clock …
Kisumi: (looks over and makes eye contact with the lass) Ohhh, don't worry y/n, I'll make sure she doesn't ruin our date~(takes out his phone and fiddles with it)
G: hey there hotshot~ what's bangin~
Y/n:(rolling your eyes) Do you need something?
G: I'm not talking to you, am I? Actually, You're not so bad yourself too~ what are such fine boys like you two doing here without any dates~
Y/n: (gives her a disgusted stare and glances at Kisumi) 
Kisumi: (winks at you and smiles) Not at all, we do have dates~
G:(looking around) Oh? Where would they be~ bet they're cheating on you~ hoes ain't loyal nowadays hehehe
Kisumi: (pulling you to his side and kissing your cheek) Well, my date is right here, and I know for a fact that he's not cheating on me
Y/n:(giggles and smiles at him) and mine is DEFINITELY not cheating hehehe
G: (Giving you a revolting glare) You are what now?? Heh, I might've misheard you, THIS, is your boyfriend??
Kisumi: (grinning proudly) Why yes! Isn't he perfect? 
G: HAHAHAHA!! This guy right here?? Your boyfriend?? Puh-lease! Have you seen his face?? He looks like he was picked up from a dumpster or something LMAO.
Y/n: (scoffs) And you look like someone whose face can be wiped off with a makeup remover
Kisumi: (stifles a laugh)
G: (glaring at you sharply) Tough talk, why do you think you're better than me? I suppose you don't know who I am?
Kisumi: Hmmmm….I can't seem to recall…OH WAIT!! KING KONG?? THAT'S YOU RIGHT??
Y/n: (bursts out laughing)
G: (gritting her teeth, walks up to you and shoves her bag at your face)
Kisumi: (pulls you away and grabs her hand) Whoa there young lady, chill out~
Y/n: what the- ma'am control yourself!! You're the one disturbing us right now!! Didn't we say we're together?? Go away this instant!!
G: (grabs your collar) Little pipsqueak! You're talking way too much aren't-
Kisumi: (breaks her away and pushes her onto the ground, giving her a death stare) now now, if I see you laying a finger on my y/n, I will not hesitate to deal with you myself.
G:(starts yelling and crying) Ugh! These two boys are threatening me!! Help!
Y/n: (looking around in panic as passers-by start staring at the scene) uh-oh-
Kisumi: (giggling)
G: You think this is funny??
Kisumi: (waving his phone) I've recorded every single thing you've said, right from the moment you started talking to us. Go ahead, scream for help. I bet that the police would loveee to hear this little recording of their complaint filer~
Y/n: (looks at Kisumi in surprise, then smiles evilly at the girl) Well well well, look who's caught up, like a spider caught in its own web~  
Kisumi: (pulls you close and gestures to the bystanders that nothing is wrong, then glares at the girl intimidatingly) Scoot. 
G:(getting up weakly)Y-you!! Ugh! Y'all are nothing but ugly trash anyway!
Y/n: oh? And you were checking out trash?
G:(growls and walks away, tripping over a soda can and diving head first into a fountain right besides)
Kisumi and y/n:( burst out laughing and walk towards the next ride, holding hands)
Y/n: kisu?
Kisumi: (kissing your forehead) Mhm?
Y/n: I'm.. Attractive…right?
Kisumi: (tickling you and making you laugh) 
Y/n: (laughing and giggling) KISU - STOP-AHAHAHA!!
Kisumi: (teehees and wraps you in a hug, picking you up and gazing into your eyes) You're my sun, and my moon. You're the brightest shining star in my eyes, no matter what anyone else says, you'll be the light to my world
Y/n: (blushing and covering Kisumi's face with your palm) Sheesh, such a smooth talker!
(You two go on ride after ride, having the best day of your lives and completely forget about the girl who once tried to ruin your relationship. With Kisumi as your boyfriend, the happiness, joy and pleasure is never ending, and the love is evermore)
(Grabs snacks; time to end this with the best >:D)
Ikuya Kirishima
(As you two are enjoying your lunch time together in your University cafeteria, a stuck up looking couple approaches you. You and Ikuya pay them no heed and simply continue having your food. The boy walks behind you and you hear a snipping sound. You notice that Ikuya's expression has changed to a nasty, murderous glare)
Ikuya: (getting up) What do you think you're doing??
Y/n:(feeling your hair to see what's wrong. You notice it's a few strands short in an area) What the heck did you do to my hair??
B: chill bro just a lil game of dares we were playin, nothin personal!
G: hehehe, how brave b/n! 
Ikuya: (growling and grabbing the boy's collar) Who do you think you are?? And who the fuck allowed you to touch y/n's hair?? Much less cut it off??
Y/n:( catches sight of the lock of hair in the boy's hand) BRO, WHAT THE HECK??
G: oh calm down! You two don't need to overreact so much!
Y/n: overreact?? How about I cut off your hair?? Then I'd call it even
B: (pushes Ikuya away and grabs the girl's hand) don't you dare touch her
Ikuya: how about you first give up and Quietly make up for the damage you've caused??
Y/n: Fuck the game, You have no right to cut someone's hair like that! Like who even are you?? 
G: B/n do something about these two nuisances. They're getting on my nerves
B: you're looking for a fight? Then you've got one, heh! Think you're tough??
Y/n: (pulling Ikuya back) Control, don't start a fight with the likes of these two. It's not worth it.
(Hiyori had approached you at a distance and spotted the commotion. Unbeknownst to you all, he secretly clipped everything. The moment Ikuya is about to get into a fight, he rushes to get a professor involved) 
Ikuya: (smiling angrily at the guy and grabbing his collar, trying to throw him away) 
Y/n:(tries to stop him but the girl grabs your arms) IKUYA- hey-!! You bitch!! 
B:( grabs Ikuya's hair, pulling it and tries to bang his head on his own, but Ikuya's stronger than him, and he can't resist the force of Ikuya's body) nnggh! You insolent!!
Y/n:(notices that the girl is wavering her attention and quickly sweep her feet, causing her to crash down) heh, tough luck~
Y/n: (quickly grabs her and detains her on a chair nearby, making sure she doesn't move by passing her on to a onlooking student) please keep a watch on her, I want to make sure nobody gets hurt here!
B: you little!! How dare you do that to my girlfriend!! I'll make this guy pay!! 
Ikuya: (tries to keep the boy on a deadlock, but he manages to free himself, grabbing Ikuya's shoulders and kneeing him in the crotch) AAAH!!
B: (taking advantage of the crippling Ikuya, he grabs his shirt and tries to throw him on the ground)
Y/n: the fucking audacity!! (Jumping onto the guy and kicking his face hard, causing him to disorient)
Hiyori: these ones right here sir! Please take charge of them!!
(A professor enters the scene and smacks the boy and the girl hard, and then asks you and Ikuya to join them, as he takes everyone to the principal. There, Hiyori waits for the two of you outside while the principal questions you about the situation. He mentions that he's already watched the clip Hiyori recorded, and will make sure to punish the couple. You two thank him and reunite with Hiyori outside)
Hiyori: I should've come sooner…
Ikuya: (still in pain, just shakes his head) No… thanks for saving us..
Y/n: (patting Ikuya's back) Iku? Are you alright? You were so brave…thank you so so much. I love you..
Ikuya: (smiles tenderly and strokes your cheek) anything to protect you…
Hiyori: It's time to leave now…I wish I could help you take care of Ikuya, but it's time for our swim training. Y/n, I trust you to take good care of him! I'll fill in for you Ikuya, heal up!
Y/n: (nodding your head) bubyee, and thank you so much again Hiyori kun!!
(You take Ikuya to your home and let him rest there, as you tend to him…)
Y/n: (strokes Ikuya's messed up hair) how dare he…I'll never forgive that jerk.. Your beautiful hair..
Ikuya: (gently holds your roughly cut locks and sadly stares at them) If only I could replace these with mine…I can't stand to see your hair being destroyed like this…
Y/n: (shaking your head and resting a hand on his) Maybe, but I still hated the way he fought you…I hated when he grabbed your head…Every second of it…I loathed it
Ikuya: (winces when you place a hand on his, as it was resting on his crotch. He quickly tries to act it off) Nmm!.. Sorry-....
Y/n: (looking at Ikuya's pained expression) Hey…. Does it still hurt?
Ikuya:... No…
Y/n : tell me the truth…
Ikuya:....
Y/n: knew it. Let me just…(embraces Ikuya and kisses his cheek) I'll make the pain disappear. You're my everything Ikuya…I love you..
Ikuya: (giggles a little and pats your head) I love you too y/n, my little angel~<3)
(You and Ikuya sit there on the couch, gazing outside from your window. Watching the sunset in silence and being in each other's presence was more than enough to recharge and refresh the two of you back to normal)
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writers-ex · 1 year
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spider 2shin?!?! why didn't they save y/n that's so mean 😭😭😭😭i thought at least yuna would've hmp also ryujin stealing a kiss 👀🫣🥵 that's hOT THAT's HOT !!! hgnfjfhdjxhdhsndjdjsjjs excited for the next installment!!!
also yoo!!! YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU LIKE PJO!??? i love pjo 😭😭😭😭 i remember waiting for the release of the last book of the series that was a sequel to pjo i read it bc i loved pjo so much skdjdjsjsjdjs
also !!! i like dancing as well we have a lot of stuff in common 💗💗💗 i mean i'm not good at it but i wanna get back to dancing as exercise hnghhh i had itzy's not shy and it'z summer memorized before as well as bp's playing w fire idk if i still do now hnghh hopefully i find the time again but wow i can't imagine dancing and singing in front of an audience i'd be too embarrassed you're so nrave for that😩
ALSO ALSO!! u right frozen 2 slayed!! icb disney deleted the video that they made for THE promotion of disney+ here probably bc the one w inti the unknown got millions of views (3M last i checked if i'm not mistaken??) compared to their other videos to promote their shows hmp!!! there's only one out of three left (https://youtu.be/1tcFWWkjKjc)
thankfully someone recorded the one that got millions of views (a member of my fave grp was there too he sang w one famous actress and another power vocal who won a tv competition) bc i downloaded the hd version of the video but deleted it bc i didn't think disney would delete another video 😭😭😭 (they deleted janella's version of How Far I'll Go that she sang for moana's release years ago bc it got more views than the original/american version so there's only one video left of that performance which is on wish bus😭😭😭)
https://youtu.be/A4ugutCN3bs
https://youtu.be/FbeaY3BHXVA wAIT NO IT's BACK?! IN THE OFFICIAL CHANNEL?! i have hope for the disney+ performance then 🥹 but it might take yrs dafuq
https://youtu.be/RbIy7RVM9OQ this one has the third performance which is so cool bc zack performed in a historical site within the capital city (i live in the greater area of the city lmao)
you won't be able to save these performances in the spotify playlist i'm afraid hngh
also last !!! thank you for the well wishes for ppop 🥹 yea you said it right haha it's just my way of contributing to helping ppop rise hngh no pressure at all but if you or anyone else is interested here's a ten min vid of a fan organized event that i didn't get to attend bc it happened on sunday and sunday is family dayy (we passed by the venue event on the way home but i didn't see anything :(( one of my fave gg made a surprise appearance after having just performed somewhere else they appeared last "KAIA" in the interview and all of this was for free no fee for artists they willingly went to perform for fans 🥹🥹🥹)
https://youtu.be/Eh0-Yb73dpA
ahhh!! thank u for listening i'm gonna give y'alls a break from the links and stuff this is my last for a while hahaha
- 😚
i will write the pt 2 of the spider!itzy y/n revenge plot when i have time and if i dont within a month plz remind me T^T anyone actually- im dead serious plz remind me i will forget
I LOVE PJO!! i read his stuff during the pandemic and it began my comfort series, i'm stoked for his next book and the disney show <333333 i am a camphalf blood camper and felt a connection with jason bc glasses buddies unite :)
and dang i just learned twice TT, bts's bapsae, pentagon shine (THATS MY SONG), and skz miroh but i've been forgotten them :,)
i gotchu here are the links to some amazing performances <3 and darn :,) i'll make a youtube playlist for myself then hehe the moana one isn't working btw T_T
link one
link two
link three
and NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO you're welcome to keep spamming ik life gets busy and rough but the ask box and my dms will always be open if you need a pick me up or smol drabble or just to say hey :3 i gotchu boo
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3.10.24 Sunday
8:56 am
Still,have windblow....Happy Blessed Sunday... I'm thinking of money and job... I'm not happy and not satisfied being flatten this way... I feel unfulfilled and having this self-pitying... I'm worrying so much, so many fake people somewhere out there just observing and copying and removing me.
I wanna leave the home town, I can't get x-factor and I can't get success here...I wanna leave the hometown I don't exist here and I just feel jealous.
Still, waiting for Amazon....So, many frustrations....Can I be famous here??? I'm not happy being like this....I wanted my nose perfection and other vanities...
I can't even get a bf who can lift me up....I want someone sensitive and cute this time...
I have frustration on sex and frustration on my social life....
9:01 am
Where is Mitch? Did she? Did she give me a "simple battery"?
I hate it if there is a big secret since 2007???
9:49 am
I still have windblow....Do you have a secret?? Until when will you keep the secret and cage me??? I have windblow for 17 years and it is totally unfair if they are waiting for an another 3 years to make it 20! I feel that reds or 20's is being fake for so long....But someone must be responsible for something... Right??
Killing someone unfairly? Erasing someone? Copying then removing? Observing me? Then, imitating without a fair fight?
youtube
10:07 am
Uncle Jun didn't attend his task in baranggay today coz he washed his clothes this am or after me.... I washed my clothes last night... Plus, he always close the window in the living room... I wonder what is his main plan these days???
10:28 am
Uncle DD told me to just buy cannes gooda for now... Huh? He can't assist me angels on my original needs...
2pm
Creating memories while we can... Snooze...
youtube
2:25 pm
I don't wanna fall in love alone...
youtube
2:56 pm
youtube
3:22 pm
Grr...Someone is controlling my Samsung I'm out of record time but I loaded everything on my youtube... Who can control this... I'm gonna record...
I'm planning to switch brand hmm... Oppo or Vivo?
I can't make recording anymore coz someone is hacking my Samsung phone J8... It is impossible coz I loaded everything on youtube and erased here on my phone... I should have lots of time to record coz I erased my videos in my phone and loaded to youtube... Someone is hacking my phone again they took my time...
3:57 pm
So, sad...I have to erase my files... Impossible...It is hacking here in Samsung!
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4:05 pm
hmm... I received that all my videos were all on the "TRASH" here in my Samsung J8 but I can't find the actual "TRASH" or recycle bin?
4:24 pm
Grrr... Found it angels on Gallery then go to pictures and shared pictures then I saw a 3 bullet on the upper right corner, there I found the " TRASH" or recycle bin. I figured out it will be stored there all the deleted pictures or videos for a month... I emptied my TRASH.
I will buy Latte then will record again few songs here... I also uploaded it on my youtube @phyllistreyes3477, hoping for more subscribers hahaha...
4:57 pm
I can make a vlog on youtube but it is not my ideal to put my heart's content that way... I find it weird for me so, it is better just to share a song as memories as well... But I'm thinking now, if I'm gonna talk on my youtube but I'm not confident enough to verbalize my heart's content.
dear lie...
youtube
6:02 pm
How could an angel break my heart...
youtube
6:35 pm
My last song for today on creating memories...
youtube
8:49 pm
I still have windblow... I feel fat and ugly... A relief whenever I sing... It is my therapy if I'm worrying so much in life. I'm still worrying coz I'm thinking of money and job and my beauty. I feel self-pity whenever I see my " deep smile lines", I really wanna remove my "deep smile lines". I can't exist coz our family is facing a financial problem these days and from the past years it was really an on and off when it comes to money issues...
I'm not happy being flatten this way... I have maturity to like someone but I want someone I like and someone who can respect my needs and my art side when it comes to my vanity and my sexual preferences.
I feel bad and somehow self-pitying these days coz for 17 years I can't get success and can't get a new bf or I can't see some of the important good people in my life from the past such as Mitch? Where is Mitch? Some weird old bf's, I mean X-bf's were gone and not even saying hi to me? I feel so low... I can't even have a party or an introduction just like my 13th birthday here, when my adoptive parent's introduced me in the society here as middle-class and as an adoptive... I feel bad these days... I heard a lot of negative comment about me... I feel hurt and irritated and frustrated...
I'm gonna be out of fundings in a lil while, hoping to get a job in a lil while...
I feel hurt whenever the idea of my exes are being with my girl friends from the past years or since 2007, that they had have a gathering or linking of relationship at my back without asking me if it is ohkay...Are they intentionally doing that, until these days???
youtube
11:45 am
I still have windblow... I have skin itch on legs shit! Is it spell or dust allergies... I feel fat and ugly....
0 notes
shhthesecretdiary · 9 months
Text
Thought Dump (Aug 6, 2023, 12:32 AM)
Go ahead, put anything.
Sorna, yan kasi nakalagay before ako magtype.
Anyway,
This is attempt to produce something rather than spending a shit ton of time scrolling through different social media platforms.
Currently it is Sunday midnight, so day off. And, since I can barely get my shit together, I will write something about my life so far.
It always saddens me how I always fall short of my goals for myself. I can always start, but it is really so hard for me to be consistent and to see something 'til the end.
8th of July, I subscribed to a gym membership for 1 month. I did about 3 sessions and that was it. :( I had a lot of complains, which is true that I always feel pain on my calves, making it so hard to move them. Also, one of my pain points was that I have no effin idea what to do there, I had a personal training session during the first day, but that was too tough, I wished it was a taken a little bit slowly. Feel ko nabigla katawan ko. So I rested, and that lasted for weeks. Mageexpire na yung one month bayad, it's out of my budget to go for another month, so my goal is to lose weight first through waling and AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, PLEASE, LESSEN FOOD INTAKE AND BE WARY ABOUT WHAT I EAT.
Okay next aspect, work. I had finished my probation period last 24th of July, got the salary increase notification on the 25th, I'd be lying if I said I am satisfied with the increase, but I had to take into account na 'di pa rin ako magaling, 'di ko nababalanse yung tasks ko, nahihiya pa rin ako magtanong, still have no idea with corporates, still struggle with conversations, takot pa rin sa f2f convos with client, and still not in close relations with all of them. Bano pa rin. But I just hope they consider that my pay isn't enough in the first place. Pero sabagay, credentials ko rin.
Another, life. Hay, ang inet jusko. So far neutral pa rin ako, walang travel twing weekend, wala ring masyadong mayayang friends. Pero all in all mainit rin kasi. It takes a lot of energy and money to go out. And I wanna sleep in. Hopefully I'd get to try a lot of things soon. Once the weather is fine and I have enough money. Travel galore na. I'd really like to enjoy my youth and have something to look forward to aside from sleeping. To try something new and to explore. PERO PERA!!! I am also not on track with my budget.
Next, education. Ilang buwan na ako dito sa UAE, ilang buwan na rin akong 'di nagrereview for CPALE. Sometimes I just want to move out of here and live somewhere near the office, with my own apartment. Then sing alone, exercise, make my own food, then lesser time for commute, more time for myself. But still, money, and for sure mama will not agree. I also lost my streak to Duolingo French and finding it hard to go back. Consistency issues. My Coursera certification was buried na, and for the taxes and laws here, idk anymore.
Health, I feel like this has been my shittiest physical appearance, the worst look I've ever been. 73kg with a lot of acne, no menstruation for two months, losing a lot of hair, and I'm already numb. Lack of sleep during weekdays, oversleeping on the weekends.
Creativity, I feel like I am losing touch on the things I loved to do before. Art, music. Singing, Dancing, Recording, Video Editing, trying to do photography. Will make a conscious effort to try and produce some art again.
Hay, for the wins: Got credited for a Lexis Nexis article with Daisy for UAE Corporate Tax, working on another one I absolutely have no idea about, getting a hang of my work so far, and got inspired by Bhavika to read books once again. I loved The Kite Runner so much! Currently reading The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto. Another work of Khaled Hosseini next, which would be A Thousand Splendid Suns.
I am pretty much neutral now. But at the back of my mind, a lot of my "falling short" moments haunt me. But maybe this attempt on being aware of this would be the start to acting towards it.
Checklist:
Create a budget tracker now, kahit through Zoho. Ipon for travel to Caucasus.
Increase steps 10,000-15,000.
Make conscious steps to edit life videos
Start reviewing for CPALE again.
Connect with people more.
Fix sleep sched, and conscious eating (but writing this @ 1am)
Oil hair and minoxidil (pls), skincare
Be organized
Try to do something new often
Embrace your feminine energy and take care of myself more.
Mindet and action.
Marami pa, and this is very vague tbh but ayon, I need to sleep na rin.
Good midnight.
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The 2022 writing Advent calendar: Day 15
15. What is the best gift you remember getting as a kid?
“Yeah, two night at Otaniemi, and then we’ll fly to Rovaniemi,” Gastón recapped for Matteo, as they plus their wives were sitting in Gastón and Nina’s living room one late October evening. They had been talking about their trip to Europe for Flor and Oliver’s wedding on New year’s day and they were going to go to Finland for skiing straight afterward with Simon and Ambar.
“Ambar and Simon are meeting us at the airport when we fly to Lapland,” Nina explained, “We can go look around at the capital Helsinki while Gastón is giving that lecture at the Aalto University.”
“Well, you seem to have it all under control.” Matteo leaned back on the couch, “Remind me to travel with you more often.”
“I don’t know ho I can wait two months!” Luna exclaimed from the floor where she had been playing with Newton. “By the way, is Newton going to that doggy day care again for that? We will be gone for two weeks.”
“No,” Gastón answered, “Delfi and Pedro will be taking care of him, since they are not coming with us.”
“Delfi and Pedro?” Matteo questioned.
“Delfi has had dogs her whole life,” Nina explained, “She has sometimes gone with me to walk him when we have been talking about her producing that book trailer for me.”
“I do wonder if they are planning on getting a dog themselves since they have not offered it before,” Gastón pondered.
“Well that would be a bit odd,” Luna continued, “I mean, Ambar said that she swears that Delfi is pregnant so…”
“Really?” Nina questioned, “Huh, well that would actually make sense. She has seemed a bit tired.”
“They will probably tell us when it is time,” Matteo started speaking, “Not like we are on the godparents shorts list.”
“I think Jazmin has the dips on that,” Luna noted, “Ambar did say that she is willing to go to war about it.”
“Poor Delfi and Pedro. Maybe that's why they are not coming with us to ski.”
“I hope we get to know before I start Christmas shopping,” Luna said while scratching Newton behind his ear. “I can already come up with so many cute things to give them.”
“Luna, it is October.”
“Yeah, so I only have two months to do the shopping and wrapping,” Luna countered. 
“Don’t even speak to me about Christmas shopping yet,” Nina sighed, “Year by year it gets harder. It feels like everyone already has everything, especially after all the wedding gifts. I don’t even know what to ask myself.”
“Probably something everyone has trouble with as we are supposed to be so-called adults now or something,” Matteo sighed too. 
“Uuuuh! Let's play a game!” Luna said so excitedly that she scared Newton and made him jump from her lap onto the sofa and curl next to Nina while eyeing Luna judgmentally. “Uups, sorry.”
“Should we be scared?” Gastón joked.
“No,” Luna rolled her eyes. “What is the best gift you remember getting as a kid? Maybe that can give us some inspiration for gifts this year. Hold up a second, I’ll text that Simon and Ambar as well… you know what, I’ll just put that in the group chat and tell everyone to record a video about it so we can all know each other’s… oka that is done… So, who goes first?” Luna clicked her phone’s record button and started a video.
“Uhmmm, I can,” Matteo spoke hesitantly and Luna turned her phone towards him.
“Go ahead, it is already recording.”
“Uhm… okay,” Matteo started, “When I was nine, the last Christmas… before Mom died, I had just started piano lessons because dad wanted me to do that instead of playing the guitar. But they still gave me my first guitar as a Christmas present and mom asked me to sign it, and of course, she didn’t know, none of us did, but she still got to witness my first autograph ever. I think the guitar is somewhere in storage at Dad and Sofia’s place right now.”
“We need to go find it!” Luna exclaimed, “I wanna see it!”
“We can go do that but I do not know where it actually is.”
“No problem! Nothing is impossible to Luna Valente!” Luna stopped the recording and pointed the came towards Nina. “Nina you are next!”
“Okay.” Nina stared at the camera blackly for a second, “Uhm, so. Well, this will sound really cliche, but it was a book. It was Christmas right after Mon and Dad had finally gotten divorced… I remember it because that really was the first Christmas I remember having some peace and them not fighting, since they were not together, obviously. Mom and Dad both gave me the same book as a present, I didn’t tell them that, obviously because I didn’t want them to fight. But to me it just kind of symbolized that they were on some small level on the same page, by both knowing what I wanted, even if they did not know how to communicate and would not for many years.”
“What book was that?” Gastón asked and reached her hand. Newton had crawled on Nina’s lap and had dosed off quietly snoring. 
“I don’t remember,” Nina answered. “It was a children’s book, and I definitely didn’t take it to Oxford. One of the copies is probably still at dads. I think the Mom’s copy got lost in some box when we moved to Mora’s. I can ask but it’s probably lost forever.”
“So your parents still don’t know about that?” Luna asked from behind the camera.
“No they don’t, and I don’t think I will ever tell them.” Nina said and fiddled with Newton’s ear, “Well that was that.”
“I’ll go last.” Luna started another video on her phone. “So Gastón, your turn.”
“Okay, mine also involves my parents. It was when they gave me my first camera.” Gastón started. “It was our first Christmas in the house they still live in. I didn’t know it at the time, I was nine or something since I was in third grade, but that was the time they really had started having money. They gave me this small digital camera, and I did not know how to use it and I thought it was stupid. Like I said: I was nine. Anyways, we actually went to Canada that year for new Year and that's where I actually learned to ski. There, dad took me out and actually taught me how to use the camera and told me that: even if I didn’t appreciate it then, it could bring a lot of things into my life. You all know how Mom and Dad met at the photography course at university, so that's what he obviously meant and now I know that he was right.” He scooted closer to Nina on the couch and wrapped his arm around her waist. 
“Aww, that was cute,” Luna squealed, “Okay, Matteo take this.” she threw her phone to Matteo. “My turn.”
“Okay, it is recording,” Matteo said and directed the phone toward Luna who was still sitting on the floor.
“I don’t fully remember this, since I was five I think, but Mom and Dad told me that I was always drawn towards all kinds of sun and star things.” Luna started, “Well, now we know why, and but at the time they just thought it was cute. So for Christmas that years, they got me this huge sun-shaped pillow. And apparently, what I said when I got it was: but why is it the sun? I am the moon!! But the pillow was so cute and me and Simon had some much fun jumping on it.”
“What happened to it?” Matteo asked.
“Yeah…” Luna laughed, “We kind of broke it with Simon…”
I had so much fun with this. First of all I love the Gastina/Lutteo dynamic and I relly loved coming up with some sentimental stories about their childhood and what their parents got them. Secondly, I really love writing Gastón and Nina's dogs reactions to what ever they are doing. I also firmly believe that Pelfi are the first ones to have kids from the Roller Crew
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whiteqnn · 3 years
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PURE [3] - Corpse Husband x Fem! Reader
A/N: Over 1 thousand notes. You guys are insane. I can’t see any other explanation.
Thank you so much for all the love and support under the previous parts, all those comments just absolutely made my day! I would never expect this story to receive such a positive feedback, which I’m extremely grateful for! 
Anyway, I decided to add some additional plot to this story - mainly, the sudden criticism and hate directed on Y/N after the last Among Us stream. I thought it would make things more interesting.
That being said, I hope you enjoy the third part ^^
part 1
part 2 
part 4 
part 5
PURE [3]
Y/N stared at her phone screen, reading through the latest tweets of her friends inviting their fans to watch their streams. It was Thursday evening and just as it was planned, everyone was getting ready for another game of Among Us. Just as she would do if it wasn’t for all those comments...
The last stream caused sudden, unexpected amounts of attention on her social media. She probably shouldn’t be that surprised by it, given the fact that by appearing in Sean’s and Felix’s videos she wasn’t all that strange to their fans. But people who watched Rae, Toast, or Corpse’s streams didn’t know her. And apparently, some of them weren’t that happy to see a new face among the group of well-known gamers. 
She always tried to avoid the unnecessary spotlight as much as she could, preferring to stay hidden somewhere behind other, much more popular streamers. And it never bothered her. She was never one to enjoy too much attention anyway.
That’s why when she discovered how upset, or even angry, some people were when she played with all those famous streamers, she was quite shocked, to say the least. 
Like all those comments under Poki’s tweet, in which she mentioned who’s gonna be playing this time...
“Duh, why’s that Y/N chick supposed to play with them again? There are at least hundreds of other, much more popular streamers I can think of who would be better than her.”
“Who the fuck is she anyway? Why’s she there?”
“lmao, some random girl who got lucky enough to know jacksepticeye. Don’t get why she’s playing with them though.”
“NOT HER AGAIN. I SWEAR TO GOD SHE WAS SO FUCKING ANNOYING LAST TIME”
Sure, she wasn’t as famous as Felix, or Sean, or Rae, or anyone else for that matter. Her audience wasn’t very small, but it was nothing compared to the number of fans other YouTubers had. It was understandable that most people didn’t know who she was, and didn’t understand why she was there in the first place.
She was, in fact, just some random girl who was lucky to have Sean as her friend. But in a group of such great and well-known streamers, she definitely stood out like a sore thumb. 
Y/N almost jumped in her seat when her phone beeped with a new message, Sean’s nickname showing up at the top of her screen. 
Jackaboy: We’re starting in a few kiddo
Jackaboy: But join the call now so we can both make fun of Felix
After the last game, she was so excited and couldn’t wait for this evening. She looked forward to cooperating with Sykkuno again, to arguing with Toast, to laughing with Sean and Felix, to murdering other people with Corpse... Yet now, all this excitement seemed to vanish just like the mood to play, let alone talk with other people. They would surely see right through her and try to make her spill the beans, which would ruin the stream. And the last thing she wanted was to ruin their game.
Jackaboy: You there Y/N??
She sighed, thinking of some believable excuse that wouldn’t arouse suspicion, but her mind was flooded with all those comments and DMs she received over those past days, which expressed nothing but hatred towards her. 
Y/N: I’m really sorry Sean, but I don’t think I will be joining you today... I don’t feel very well. 
She waited for Sean’s reply impatiently, expecting him to send her some angry emoji or tell her to move her ass and join the discord call. What she didn’t expect though, was that he would facetime her. 
Her first instinct was to throw her phone across the room as if it would make Sean stop calling. He wouldn’t stop unless she’d tell him the truth. 
So she cleared her throat and plastered the widest smile on her face, before answering his call.
“Alright, what is going on?” Sean asked right away, staring at her with his brows furrowed. He wasn’t in his recording room, but in his kitchen, which meant that he left his stream to call her. “And please don’t tell me you’re sick cause I won’t believe it anyway. And neither will Pewds.”
“I’m tired, Sean... I was working late again and I really need to rest.” she lied, trying to keep her voice steady and calm. She really didn’t want Sean to interrogate her now, not when his fans were waiting for him. “I’m sure you’ll find someone else though. Please tell the guys that I’m sorry”
“Y/N, c’mon, cut this bullshit. What’s wrong?” he asked softly, moving his phone closer to his face. “You know you’re a terrible liar, just tell me what happened. If you don’t wanna play then neither do I.”
“Sean, please don’t do it” she shook her head with a sigh. “Your fans are waiting for you, I’ll be fine.”
“Well they’re waiting for you too you dummy, I already promised them you’ll be playing with us tonight” he stated matter of factly, rolling his eyes. Y/N remained silent for a moment, and Sean suddenly furrowed his brows, narrowing his eyes at her in a suspicious look. “Did someone tell you something rude last time we played? Who and what?”
“What? No, Sean, oh my God. Everyone was super nice, it has nothing to do with the last stream... not with you guys, at least.” she mumbled under her breath, dropping her eyes from Sean’s confused face.
“What do you mean not with you guys? Y/N, what the hell happened?” he demanded, slowly getting more and more worried. She wouldn’t tell him though, too scared that Sean would just laugh it off, even though he also sometimes had problems with dealing with hate. And just as if he was reading her mind, Sean sighed, his face softening in a sad smile. “You’ve read the comments, didn’t you?”
She felt so stupid for being so easily offended by comments of some random people on the Internet, that she just nodded her head meekly, still looking anywhere but at the man. 
“Look kiddo... I’m not gonna tell you to get yourself together and just ignore them, cause it won’t help, and I know cause I’ve been there. Hell, I’m still there.” he chuckled to himself and continued “Anyway, you really shouldn’t be worrying yourself about people who don’t even know you. They don’t know you, Y/N, why would some complete stranger’s opinion matter to you?”
“They said I shouldn’t be playing with you guys... that I’m nothing but a burden and you should be playing with someone who’s at least recognizable.”
“Well excuse me Miss, last time I checked I could choose who the fuck I want to play with.” Sean scoffed, clearly irritated by such comments “You’re one of my best friends Y/N and I don’t give a fuck what some haters say. And neither should you.”
“Maybe you should just invite someone else... It would make everyone happy.” she muttered almost inaudibly, but Sean almost barked at her when he heard her words.
“I told you to cut that bullshit, Y/N! Everyone couldn’t wait for this game and now you wanna back out? C’mon, kid. Do you have any idea how heartbroken Sykkuno’s gonna be? When you left so quickly last time, he kept complaining that he has no one to team up with.” she couldn’t help but smile at that, letting out a tiny giggle. “And Corpse? Have you even seen his last tweet?”
“What? No, I- I don’t follow him...” she said, wondering what Sean was talking about. She quickly searched for Corpse on Twitter, still being on facetime with Sean, and her heart almost dropped when she saw the last tweet.
@.Corpse_Husband Really excited for tonight’s Among Us stream, 8PM PST.
Jacksepticeye
Valkyrae
Pewdiepie
Pokimane
Sykkuno
Disguised Toast 
Logic 
Mr Beast
and, hopefully, my partner in crime - Little Y/N 
:)
She stared at the screen with her eyes widened, and her lips corners curling up in a small, bashful smile. It was so nice of Corpse to mention her as well, especially with the nickname that he seemed to like so much since their last game. 
“God, if you could see yourself right now. How’s it that my pep talk didn’t do shit, but Corpse’s tweet magically made you smile, ugh.” Sean reminded her of his presence, and she quickly returned to the call, trying to somehow control her burning cheeks. 
“It’s not like that, Sean, I really appreciate that you’re trying to cheer me up... I just didn’t expect your friends to like me...” she admitted quietly, and if Sean could, he would probably strangle her at that moment. 
“I JUST TOLD YOU THAT SYKKUNO KEPT BUGGING ME ABOUT YOU FOR TWO FUCKING HOURS. YOU THINK HE WOULD TALK ABOUT YOU IF HE DIDN’T LIKE YOU?!”
“I just... what if they’re just being nice, but they don’t actually want me to play with them?”
“I’m done.” Sean groaned, shaking his head furiously. “Alright, here’s what you’re gonna do. You stay away from your phone, join the discord call, say hi to everyone, and we’re all gonna have fun, okay? If not, Pewds is gonna murder you, cause he was already growing impatient even before I called you.”
“I’m still not sure if that’s a good idea, Sean...”
“But I am sure, Y/N! Now come on, we’re playing in five. I’m telling everyone you’re joining as well.”
And before she could even reply, he hung up. Y/N groaned, rushing to her computer to turn it on. Now it would just be plain rude not to join the game, especially after Sean wasted his time talking with her, while he should be talking to his fans. Just as he suggested, she kept her phone far away from her desk, deciding to stay away from Twitter and all those comments for a bit. Maybe it would help her clear her mind and at least try to have some fun. 
An invite to the group call was already waiting for her, along with a message from Sean with a code to the game. Y/N put her headphones on before joining the call and quickly typing in the code. 
“... so let me repeat myself. I ALWAYS sound guilty, no matter what. Please, guys, don’t vote me out!” 
Y/N shook her head with a smile on her lips when the first thing she heard after joining the call was Felix’s pleading voice. Clearly, he was already trying to save his own ass even before the game began.
 Y/N could hear Sean’s loud voice as he commented on Felix’s plea with some snarky remark, later also catching the sounds of Rae’s laughter. Everyone was already there, they’ve been clearly waiting for her to join. 
“Hey, look who’s finally here! Hi Y/N!” Poki noticed her presence first. 
“Hello everyone” Y/N said, as shy and quiet as usual.
“Oh, Y/N! It’s so great to see you again, I was worried you weren’t joining us tonight” Sykkuno said, a pout clear in his voice. 
“WELL ABOUT DAMN TIME” Felix all but yelled, making her roll her eyes with a smile. “What did I tell you about being late?!”
“Give her a break Felix, her mic wasn’t working again... Luckily, I was there to save the damsel in distress” Sean said, and even though she couldn’t see him, Y/N was almost certain that he was smirking. 
“Yeah, I’m really sorry guys to have kept you waiting so long...” Y/N said, feeling genuinely bad. Maybe Sean was right after all? They could have just invited someone else, and yet they decided to wait for her.  
“It’s okay, you’re here now and it’s all that matters” a deep voice sounded out, and whether she liked it or not, Y/N grinned like an idiot with a blush rising up her cheeks. 
“Shit, here we go again...” Felix sighed, making everyone else laugh. Y/N bit at her lower lip, feeling her heart thump in her chest as she felt a sudden wave of courage, deciding to speak up despite her initial shyness:
“Well... I couldn’t just leave my partner in crime alone, right?” she asked, and she could swear she heard Corpse stutter as if he completely didn’t expect her to say that.  
“Ah yes, after all, killing wouldn’t be the same without her, right Corpse?” Toast teased, repeating Corpse’s words from the last stream. Everyone in the call laughed, Y/N included. She couldn’t stop herself from smiling, even though just mere minutes ago she was on the verge of crying. “It’s good to have you here, Y/N/N. Maybe I’ll actually get a chance to finally kill you this time.”
“Jesus Christ, Toast. You sound like a psychopath. Hey, I’m happy you’re here, lemme stab you in the back, please?” someone whose nickname was MrBeast spoke up with a chuckle, before directing his next words to Y/N “I believe we haven’t played together before, I’m Mr Beast, it’s really nice to meet you Y/N”
“Yeah, pleased to meet you!” another player, Logic, spoke up “I also didn’t have a chance to play with you yet, but I’ve seen Sean’s last stream... Let me just say, that Toast murder was absolutely perfect!” 
“Wow. And here I almost managed to block it out. I’m fucking traumatized Y/N, you should be ashamed of yourself” Toast scoffed over Felix’s laughter. 
“You should be proud of yourself!” Sean interfered “Just so you know lads, Y/N may seem like a little angel, but she’s a little demon. You’ve been warned.” 
“Yeah, she’ll charm you with her voice only to snap your neck next second.” Felix scoffed.
“Just like she did with Corpse!” 
“Charm?!” Y/N gasped, her cheeks burning.
“I don’t recall Y/N killing me...” Corpse said in his low voice. 
“I love how that’s the only thing he denied” Poki pointed out in a teasing voice, which only made Y/N sink further into her chair. 
“Can we please start the game now?” she asked in a pleading voice, hoping that everyone would stop making fun of Corpse and her. She could only imagine how uncomfortable he felt, for some reason being the target of their jokes... They must’ve made him feel awkward, right? 
“Jack, did you tell Y/N how we’re playing tonight?” Sykkuno asked, and she sighed in relief that they dropped the jokes. 
“Oh, right! So there’s this mod called proximity chat, where we’re able to hear each other as we pass by another person, and it seems quite fun so that’s what we decided to try out tonight.” Sean explained to Y/N, and before she could ask another question, he added “I’ve just sent you the link, it’ll take a minute to install it.”
“Oh, okay. Thank you Sean” Y/N said, before downloading the mod and quickly installing it. When everything was set and ready, she pulled up Among Us again and typed in the code, and the game finally began. 
“Woah”
“Holy shit!” 
“Guys this is so cool!” Sykkuno exclaimed, his voice so happy and excited that Y/N couldn’t help but giggle. 
“Okay, I’m scared now. I feel like encounters with Imposter are just gonna be perfectly cut screams” Felix chuckled, as they left the dropship and moved down the map. That’s when Y/N gasped in surprise, upon seeing the locations completely different than those she was used to.
“Wait- is that a different map?” she asked through her mic, hearing Toast’s distanced, devilish laugh. There was only Rae and Sykkuno beside her, as everyone else have already split up to do their tasks.
“Oh yeah, that’s Polus, it’s much more fun than the one we were playing in last time.” Rae explained happily and Y/N groaned. She didn’t know that map.
“Great. I don’t even know how am I supposed to do tasks in here...”
“Oh, it’s not that hard. They’re in most cases similar to those you already know, they only look a little bit different.” Sykkuno said in his kind voice, before asking “Do you want to team up again, Y/N?”
“I thought you would never ask Sykkuno” Rae chuckled under her breath.
“Yeah, that would be great! I need someone to show me around” she smiled. The trio finally moved from their spot beside the dropship and went to the left where, as Y/N later realized, was electrical. She quickly did her task in there, being under the watchful eyes of both Sykkuno and Rae.  
Before the latter could do his own task, the first body was reported.
“The body is in the lab” Felix said, and Y/N couldn’t help but smirk as she saw that it was Toast who was murdered first. One less person to accuse her or try to frame her, if he was the Imposter. 
“I just ran towards the lab from the left side, I only saw Poki on my way there” Corpse said right away, and the accused girl was quick to try and defend herself:
“Okay, I wasn’t in the lab, I was doing that engines task which is next to the lab.” 
“Did you see someone else there?” Jack questioned. 
“Nope, just me and the engines.” 
“Okay. Sykkuno, where are you?” the lime astronaut was next on Jack’s list of suspects, which made Sykkuno groan. 
“Why do you sound so suspicious right away?” he asked in disbelief, causing the rest to giggle “I was with Y/N and Rae all this time, we were all doing our tasks in electrical.”
“Is that true Y/N?”
“Yes Sean, that is true” she rolled her eyes with a laugh “I don’t even know this map, I have to stick with someone so I don’t end up like Toast.”
“Alright, what about rest? Logic? I think I saw you in admin but then you disappeared somewhere.” Felix said.
“Yeah I’m with Mr Beast in the office”
“That’s right” Mr Beast confirmed, which didn’t bring anything new to the investigation, so everyone decided to skip.
“Wo- Okay where are we now?” Y/N asked in surprise, when the new round began in some completely new place Sykkuno didn’t manage to show her yet. She could hear as Corpse laughed at her shocked voice, which made her smile widely.
“Yeah, I’m also not used to this new map yet” he admitted, his black astronaut walking up to her white one “Hey, wanna see something cool?”
“Sure!”
-
*Meanwhile Sykkuno*
“Okay this is bad guys, we lost Y/N” Sykkuno said to his mic, running around the map to find the girl he was earlier teamed up with. “I thought she followed us when the new round began, but she must’ve gone the other way... What if she’s dead already? Not good, not good...” 
-
"Woah! This looks amazing! Is there some task here as well?”
“Yes, there’s temperature recording right here” Corpse said, standing by the lava pit, watching as Y/N’s character ran back and forth over the pool of lava. 
“I wonder if you could jump into it. What do you think, Corpse?” she asked curiously, standing close to the edge. 
“Not that I’m aware of it...” he mumbled coming closer to the edge as well “Why would you jump into it?” he asked with a half-smile on his face. 
“So Felix can’t stab me in the back.” she whispered, even though there was no one around them. 
“You think it’s him?” Corpse mirrored her voice, and she hummed in response “Why?”
“He’s constantly suspicious of everyone, last time we played he also kept interrogating us all, without even telling his own location.” she stated as if it was very obvious. Corpse couldn’t help but let out a laugh “What? Why are you laughing at me?”
“Not at you, Y/N. I’m just impressed by your investigation skills” he admitted “In that case, we better both jump in. Felix likes to frame other people.”
“You wanna jump into the lava with me?”
“Sure I do.”
“There you are!” Sykkuno’s lime astronaut came out of nowhere, followed by Mr Beast. Two of them walked up to Y/N and Corpse, and before the latter could even say anything, Mr Beast snapped Y/N’s neck.
“WAIT, NO-”
“OH GOD, OH GOD” Sykkuno yelled in panic.
“KILL HIM CORPSE” Mr Beast screamed, frantically running around.
-
“What the heck?” Y/N stared at her screen in shock, her dead body laying over the lava pit. Mr Beast had already fled to the left, leaving her, Sykkuno and Corpse standing between two of them. None of them said anything for a moment before the black astronaut finally spoke up.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N” he kept repeating, regret clear in his voice. “And Sykkuno, I- I can’t even express how-”
He was cut off by Felix’s scream, who reported the bodies before Corpse could kill him as well.
“IT’S CORPSE ALRIGHT” Felix yelled right away “HE’S STANDING OVER Y/N AND SYKKUNO, HE HAS THEIR BLOOD ON HIS HANDS”
“That is- I did not kill them” Corpse replied, calm as ever, as opposed to his frantic apologies. 
“Then why were you standing there?! Without reporting the bodies?!”
“I was... mourning their death.” he replied, which caused the whole group to burst out laughing. “Seriously guys, you think I would murder Sykkuno? And Y/N? I would never even think of hurting them.”
“The simp is strong, we get it, but it doesn’t really save your situation” Rae laughed. 
“Let’s kick him out guys, he can’t even defend himself” Sean chuckled, and everyone else didn’t need to be told twice. Soon enough, Y/N watched as Corpse’s black astronaut was thrown into the lava pit... Oh, the irony...
The game continued with her wandering around the map, doing the rest of her tasks to at least support somehow her fellow crewmates. She stumbled upon Corpse’s ghost at some point and laughed wholeheartedly when he started circling her little character in something she read as an attempt to apologize. 
A little while later another body was reported, this time it was Felix who lost his life. Y/N didn’t really focus on the conversation this time, glancing at her phone instead. There was this urge to reach for it and check how people reacted to her joining the game, but she kept repeating Sean’s words in her head. There was no point in worrying about the opinion of somebody who doesn’t even know her... or at least that’s what she tried to convince herself to think. 
Her attention was brought back to the game when she heard the sound of a new message from someone who was also dead. She clicked on the chat, seeing that it was one of the Impostors.
Corpse: :(
Corpse: I’m sorry 
Y/N thought it was sweet of him to apologize for it, even though it was his main goal to murder everyone after all. She believed he was genuinely sorry for it, just like she was each time she was an Impostor and had to kill somebody.
Sykkuno: Welcome to the afterlife, Corpse!
She laughed at Sykkuno’s constant happiness, which was evident even in his messages, before typing one as well:
Y/N: We’re all corpse here
Sykkuno: Oh, so it means we’re all really cool then ^^
Y/N: Fair point
Corpse: See Y/N
Corpse: I told you I would jump into the lava for you 
Y/N: You didn’t exactly jump...
Corpse: :(
Y/N: But let’s say it counts as well :)
Corpse: :)
Before they knew, the voting ended. Mr Beast was thrown into the lava, which ultimately lead to the victory of crewmates. Y/N cheered happily, when the blue sign appeared on her screen, right above everyone else who was innocent. 
“Yaaay, the first time I wasn’t killed in the first game!” Sean announced enthusiastically, his astronaut running around the dropship.
“Yeah, and the first time it went so fast...” 
“Right? Corpse, I’m disappointed in you. What happened to the King of Impostors?” Rae asked.
“Well.. no matter how good you are, you can’t always win, right?” Corpse replied calmly.
“Hmm, you seemed kinda absent-minded during the game, though...” Poki suggested with a smirk hiding in her voice, and Rae was very quick to pick on it.
“Oh, you’ve noticed that too? Almost as if he was distracted by something” 
“I don’t know what are you talking about” he chuckled nervously, and Y/N just sat in her chair confused about what was going on. “Anyway, who’s up for another round?” 
“Yeah, I have an idea” Sean said, effectively shutting everyone up “What if we play something along the lines of hide and seek? Let’s have one impostor, and everyone else needs to get their tasks done before he finds them.”
“That is...” Felix took in a dramatic breath “THE BEST THING I’VE EVER HEARD ABOUT”
“Yeah, I think it will be fun” Sykkuno replied. 
“It sounds really cool, but let’s maybe tell who’s the impostor? I think it would be more fair” Rae suggested. 
“I think it’s a good idea” Sean concluded, before changing the settings for one impostor only. Y/N waited patiently for the game to begin, and when she saw that she was a crewmate again, she sighed in relief. Only to gasp in a panic a second later...
“It’s me.”
Everyone stumbled out of the dropship as Corpse admitted that he’s the impostor. It seemed that knowing exactly who can murder everyone made the whole game a little bit terrifying...
“I don’t know where the heck I’m going” Y/N mumbled to herself with a nervous laugh when instead of doing her tasks, she searched for the perfect place to hide. When she entered security, she spotted Mr Beast fixing the wires, so she decided to join him.
“OH SHIT- god damn it, you scared me to death!” he all but yelled when she appeared next to him, doing her tasks. 
“Sorry” she giggled, quickly finishing the wires, before speeding out of the room. On her way to weapons, she stumbled across Felix’s dead body, and could hear some screaming in the background... but didn’t recognize who was murdered next. 
Y/N managed to do most of her tasks without meeting Corpse, whom she hoped not to see probably for the first time since they played together. She was just leaving decontamination when she heard Sean’s panicked laughter:
“...tee, bitches love me?”
“Wrong.” Corpse’s voice almost made her squeak in surprise, only to really scream when he suddenly snapped Sean’s neck. 
“Retreat, retreat!” Y/N laughed as she sped past oblivious Rae and Logic, Corpse hot on her tail. She quickly returned to the decontamination room, hoping to flee from her inevitable death, when Corpse’s black astronaut walked in, and the door closed. 
“Please don’t kill me” she chuckled, even though there was no hope for her. 
“Finish my lyrics, and I’ll let you live...” he began, and Y/N furrowed her brows in confusion “ I spilt wine...”
“Wait- what lyrics? You sing?” she asked, completely dumbfounded. Corpse was silent for a moment as if he didn’t understand her, before bursting out laughing “What’s so funny again? Corpse, come on!” 
“Yes, Y/N, I do sing, I was actually hoping you’ve heard some of my songs...” he admitted, still chuckling to himself. She felt a blush rising up her cheeks.
“Oh- I- I didn’t, I-... but I will, okay? I’ll do it right away!” she promised, quickly jumping up to grab her phone and listen to Corpse’s song. She was genuinely shocked, she would never expect him to sing! 
 She unlocked her phone with a wide, somehow nervous smile on her face, which, however, dropped the moment she saw her notifications. Hundreds of notifications. 
“You there, Y/N?” Corpse’s voice reached her after a moment, when she still didn’t say anything, just kept looking at her screen. “I hope my music isn’t so bad that you passed out from listening to it...”
She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes, her phone gripped tightly in her shaking hands.
“Um, Y/N?” his voice became more worried now “Is everything okay?” 
Y/N cleared her throat and quickly wiped her eyes, closing them for a moment to steady her breathing.
“Yeah, all good Corpse” she forced herself to smile, so her voice wouldn’t sound weird. “Look, um, I need to leave, can you tell the others bye from me?” 
“Is something wrong?” Corpse asked confused.
“No, of course not!” she laughed through her tears “Something just came up and I really need to leave.”
“You sure you’re-”
“Bye Corpse. It was nice playing with you.” 
-
A/N: I hope you guys are not too disappointed in me... It didn’t turn out as I initially thought it would. Isn’t it too dramatic? And is this hate plot fine? Or is it not? What do guys you think? 
TAG LIST IS CLOSED!
@slytherin-chan @pillowjj @afuckingunicornn @love-and-virtues @ignooynim @crapimahuman @hannahjsworld @laugh-like-the-moon @fallengoddess772 @kingric03 @dolphinpink310 @paigeyisme @bunnychano3o @dxrtygxrl28 @z-nyx @baby-iyania @trashygeek
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zackcrazyvalentine · 3 years
Note
me seeing the ask masterlist realizing most of them are mine : 🤡
BUT ANYWAYS
CONCERNING THE FAMILY DAY
THE SIBLINGS 🛐
i’m not saying that i have a crush on ace’s brother , cater’s sisters and sebek’s siblings because of that some fanart but that’s exactly what i’m saying
ACE’S MOM DESTROYING HER SON LIFE IN FRONT MC ? FORGET THAT ACE’S BROTHER CAME IN WITH THE RECEIPTS . HE HAS BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT AND 👏🏾HE 👏🏾IS 👏🏾PREPARED👏🏾
“hey did you know that ace used to looooove going around butt naked when he was younger ?” “DON’T YOU DARE-“ “here i have pictures , videos , posters and mugs printed of it-“
CATER’S SISTERS WOULD PROBABLY BE ALL OVER MC
“oh they’re so cute ~ !” “(new nickname)-chan ! do you wanna see some baby pics of cater ? look at this one he couldn’t quite stand on his legs and he-“ “HAHAHAHAHAA yeah so funny ! but would you like at the time it’s to go-“
sebek’s siblings would probably resemble their parents ? i see his sister being just like his mother and his brother as calm as his father ? ACTUALLY THE WHOLE ZIGVOLT COUPLE GIVE ME BAKUGOU’S PARENTS VIBES-
JACK’S LITTLE SIBLINGS-
I- THE LOVE I HAVE FOR THEM WHEN WE DON’T EVEN KNOW THEIR NAMES-
his brother is in middle school if i’m not wrong so just like all these AnGsTy teenage boys (and his brother-) he would be like “i-it’s not like i needed your help or anything o(`ω´ )o” sure whatever rocks you boat-
HIS LITTLE SISTER WOULD BE LIKE CHEKA . THE MINUTE SHE SAW HER BROTHER SHE WOULD BE LIKE “hey big bro ! look i grew a lot since last time ! i’m a big girl now so i can go with you do luge next time ! ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ” PLEASE SHE WOULD BE ADORABLE WITH THE EARS AND ALL DOWOWODKWOMEODMEKWOWKSOWKSDKSOWKEOEOOEE
TREY’S LITTLE SIBLINGS. you’re watching from afar as a flock of children come and proceed to pummel your friend to the ground-
they would be the kind of siblings that’s asks questions about everything and anything at any time i just know-
LETS NOT EVEN TALK ABOUT KALIM’S SIBLINGS BECAUSE ITS A FUCKING ARMY AT THIS POINT-
imagine this
in a dark room somewhere in nrc . multiples children are sat besides a round table with sunglasses on and glass of grape juice adult beverages in their hand .
Okay i don’t know how to write so that it would makes sense BUT BASICALLY ITS JUST A “MY BROTHER/UNCLE BETTER YOU POO BECAUSE HE-“
yes the same would happen with the older siblings i am convinced-
also don’t worry it wasn’t too long i’m happy it gave you inspiration-
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ASK AND YE SHALL RECIVE!!!!
HONESTLY, SAME ANON!! I HAVE A BIG FAT CRUSH in Cater’s Sisters and Ace’s Brother (and Sebek’s, Azul’s & Deuces mamas) 😭😭😭
Sorry, but I'll do a hard pass writing for Kalim's mansion-full of siblings 🙇‍♀️ (plus I don't think Crowley would let 30+ kids-teens-toddles-babies come into NRC lol, maybe just the following 3 after Kalim) BUT INSTEAD!!! I hope you like the bonus character~
LOL THE FIGTH TO FIND OUT WHO'S BROTHER IS THE BEST, A CHAOTIC BATTLEFIELD FILLED WITH BABY PICTURES AND ANECDOTES OF ACCOMPLISHMENTS AND CUTE/STUPID/HEARTWARMING THINGS ALL OF THEM DID
-- -- -- --
MC attentively watched as skilled hands mix card in different flashy ways, while Ace sat beside them with a bored and irritated look on his face.
“This is your card!” The older redhead took a random card and showed it to MC. Sparkles shone in their eyes as they smiled a big bright smile, amazed at the card trick.
Ace interrupted the moment. “Oh, yeah, duh! The easiest trick there is! You just had to cast a simple spell that allows only your eyes to see which card [Name] picked highlighted in red!”
Big Brother Trappola looked at his sibling with an unamused face, MC mirroring the look at having their momentary joy crumbled like that. “Sure, a simple trick, but it was I who taught it to you. Don’t forget little Ace! You’re always following my steps~”
The heart suit boy sighed exasperatedly, shaking his head and looking some other way.
“Ah, he definitely is following a~ll your advices, Big Bro! Ace is always mentioning how you taught him many useful tricks for life!” MC became a little tattletale to antagonize their friend.
The Hearstlabyul student tensed, blushing as he looked at the other two. His sibling smirked, “Really now~? Oh, I didn’t know you loved me so much, baby bro! Say, [Name], let me tall you all my favorite stories of Ace when he was little! I even brought our old photo album for you to view! You can keep it if you like~” The aforementioned photo record appeared, “Look at this one! Ace used to wear his tighty whities like a superhero mask!”
At that, the 1st year tugged his friend away from his mischievous older brother, dragging them far away from his influences.
~°~  ~°~
“Cay-nii! Look look! We found your cute little friend before we could find you, and they were so kind to bring us here!” The younger of the two Diamond sisters waved at her brother. However, her arm remained linked with MC’s.
Cater looked scared, despair quickly painting his face. All his attempts to hide, ruined But now that his sisters had MC in their arms... He couldn’t run the risk of them embarrassing him in front of his crush.
“A-Ahaha..! Yeah, look at that..!” The orange haired boy awkwardly laughed, approaching the menace that were his sisters (with a cute, clueless MC between them).
MC spoke up with that bright smile on their face, "Your sisters are so lovely, Cater! I wouldn't mind having siblings as nice as these."
"Oh if only you knew, little Prefect." Cater though to himself.
The sisters looked at each other, then at their younger brother. "Is that so, [Name]-chan~?" The older one inquired, words drawled out in a playful yet dark tone. Oh no, Cater tensed at what they were planning.
Acting quickly, the girls dragged MC over to one of Heartslabyul's many couches. "You're always welcomed into the family, [Nickname]-chan!" "To show you you're a Diamond now, let us watch some of Cater's old baby pics! He was the most adorable little brother back then!"
The Heartslabyul student hurried up to his siblings, trying his best to ruin their "bonding" activity.
~°~ ~°~
The evening was nice, warm with a comfortable breeze... The surprising thing was that MC shared many laughs with Sebek and his siblings through the day.
They were nice, very nice! The girl was intense like their friend, while the boy was tamer, on the shy side.
They shared many stories about their family life: the fishing trips to catch salmon, what their parents were up to in the clinic and the new patients they got to work with (quite a colorful array, one must say), life in Valley of Thorns, tales of their magical awakening and how Sebek threw up when his magic woke up, funny stories of childhood games, and thought MC many songs!
With how much they butt heads with Sebek, MC wholeheartedly welcomed this wonderful day filled with happiness, shared with their friend and his siblings!
~°~ ~°~
A Magift practice match supervised by Leona
MC sat on the sidelines, a bouncing wolf pup sitting on their lap. The small child marveled at the highspeed tricks and plays of both teams. "Big Bro Jack!! Go go go, Big Bro Jack!!" She yelled at the top of her lungs, cheering her brother on.
At their side, an embarrassed sigh could be heard. Jack's little brother, who held striking resemblance with him (specially with that attitude), tried to hide away from onlookers' eyes after his sister's cheer.
But then...
Jack snatched the disk from the enemy team, sending it flying through the air with a mighty powerful flick from his magical pen and--!
"SCOOOOORE!!!!" Both young wolves screamed in happiness, tails wagging a couple times as their adrenaline kicked.
Leona laughed at the reaction. "Not so indifferent now, huh, squirt?" His hand ruffled the wolf boy's hair. The boy blushed at getting caught cheering like that.
A sudden snicker startled the siblings as they looked at the hyena beastman. "You resemble your brother a lot. I'm sure you could become as good of a player as Jack some day."
The little girl gasped in amazement, siblings looking at each other with excited sparkles in their eyes at the compliment the older of the two just received.
"Ah~, they're just as adorable as Jack!" MC gushed internally.
~°~ ~°~
"Trey-nii!" "Big Bro!" "Trey-Trey!" Many voices came their way, sounding excited about finally getting to see their beloved brother once more.
Trey chuckled nervously, "Here we go..." Suddenly, MC saw three little kids glomp their friend. Two hugged his legs while the other climbed up to cling to his torso.
"How have you been, big bro?" "Have you made friends?! Many friends?!" "Do you have sweets? I smell cake!" "Your house here looks funky!" "Can we go inside the big house, Trey-Trey?!" "Can I pick a pretty rose, Trey-nii? I really want a pretty rose!"
They fired multiple questions at their 3rd year friend. So young, so curious, a perfect embodiment of childhood...
MC giggled, "You never told me your siblings were so inquisitive. It's so cute!"
Their attention immediately turned to MC. In a hurry, they let go of Trey and approached the magicless human.
"You're a friend of Trey-nii, right?! Right?!" "You're pre~tty, no wonder Trey-Trey likes you!" "Hey, hey! Do you also have a big house like big bro?!" "Do you have any siblings? I wanna befriend my brother's friends' siblings!" "A pretty person like you deserves a pretty rose... Trey-nii! Can we pick roses to make a crown? Plea~se?!"
"Now now, let's not overwhelm [Name] in our first meeting, yes?" Trey's call silenced them in a second. "I do believe you must first introduce yourselves before asking so many questions to a stranger, don't you think?"
The trio looked to the ground and fidget with their clothes. "Yes, Big Brother Trey..."
The glasses wearing student shot an apologetic look to MC. "Why don't we go inside and get your introductions done, as well as your questions answered, over a slice of tart and a cup of tea? Sounds good? Maybe you can meet some other friends of mine, too."
The kids perked up, happy smiles brightening their faces as they nodded and took each of Trey's hands. The remaining child looked at MC, who smiled and stretched their hand for them to take before making their way into Heartslabyul dorm.
~°~ ~°~
"My Ruggie really did that?!" The old woman was surprised, wrinkled face showing her emotions.
MC affirmed with their head, "Yes, he's always helping me forage for herbs and tasty plants to use for meals! Really useful for cutting off expenses. He even taught me few recipes with said plants, recipes taught by you, Miss!"
Ruggie's grandmother smiled proudly. "He's such a nice soul, isn't he? Always bringing cans of food when he comes visit us to ensure the little ones back home have something to eat." She held MC's hand in both of hers, using the one on top to give the prefect's a couple taps.
"You treasure those recipes with your life, young one! And please," Her eyes were so gentle as she looked up at them, "Keep an eye out for my Ruggie, yes? He tends to overwork himself. Please, fulfill my role while I'm away from him, make sure he eats and sleeps well, that he stays hydrated and relaxes his mind. That is all I could ever ask from you."
MC's heart contracted with adoration at how kind this old lady was, a beautiful old soul still full of vigor.
They nodded, squeezing those calloused yet warm hands of hers.
Meanwhile, the eavesdropping hyena sniffled at the sweet moment between his grandmother and friend. He was deeply touched.
Two peopled he held dear to his heart were getting along swimmingly! More over, they just showed him they care equally as much about him as he does for them.
-- -- --
BUT WE ALL LOVE YOUR ASKS, ANON!!!!
KEEP BLESSING US WITH YOUR IDEAS!!!!
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jschllatt · 3 years
Text
𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐀 𝐁𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 | 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦
Prompt: (Based off of the song I Wanna Be Yours by Arctic Monkeys) Clay’s recent fame leads to a difficult decision to be made. Months later, he’s still regretful. You seem to be fine, so why can’t he move on, too? 
Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, slight angst
Pairing: Dream x GN!Reader
Words: 2.5k
Masterlist
I spent a week on this and idk how I feel about it but I hope you enjoy <3
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Clay had been consumed by an overwhelming emptiness, his entire body hollow as the lack of your presence took its toll. 
Two months. Two devastating months had passed since he’d made a grave mistake, and now he was facing the agonous repercussions. He was a mess—anyone could see it. Between his long, disheveled hair, the light scruff that covered his face, and his bloodshot eyes, it was clear that Clay’s mind had been somewhere else. And it had been. Every passing second was a constant reminder of his solitude, causing the emptiness in his heart to evolve into a deep, incessant void, no longer inhabited by the happiness you had ingrained in him just months before. Why? Clay was overcome with a sense of deep regret as a result of your absence, feeling more alone than he ever had before. What could have possibly happened to make him feel this way? To make you leave? The answer was rather simple—he was just too damn busy. 
Clay had dedicated a considerable amount of time to his career, filming or streaming during the little free time he had. As he grew more popular, the time that you had spent in each other’s presence dwindled significantly, each day becoming lonelier than the last. Your interactions with him had shortened drastically—what were once long, lingering kisses placed on your forehead had devolved into chaste pecks, void of any true care or meaning. While you understood entirely that Clay’s career was important, you found yourself slowly losing hope.
You realized it one day as he was filming. 
It was a day no different from the last. Clay was recording a Manhunt video in his office, his voice shrill as he begged his friends for mercy. He was always loud when he filmed, and though you had chastised him for it countless times, he never listened. A loud sigh escaped your lips, going unheard, and you shifted your position on the couch, uncomfortable. Everyday seemed to be the same—each as lonely and frustrating as the last. Clay’s ignorance only fueled your apathy towards your relationship more, and you couldn’t help but find yourself growing hopeless at the thought of Clay being unaware of your unhappiness. Your troubled thoughts continued until a week had passed—a long, grueling week in which you had hopelessly tried to burrow your apathetic thoughts. But you couldn’t. You were giving up. The realization of your unhappiness made a pit grow in your stomach. You knew that you cared about Clay, but you couldn’t keep living the way you were—tired, unacknowledged, pitiful. 
And so, you let him go.
Clay was editing by the time you gathered the courage to face him, your stomach nauseous as you approached his office door. A light knock signaled your presence, and Clay muttered a quiet ‘come in,’ his voice raspy after hours of unuse. Blowing out a breath, you entered the room, your expression sullen upon noticing Clay’s inattentiveness. His eyes were still glued to his monitor, deeply focused on editing rather than your presence. You waited for a few seconds, silently hoping he would pay you any mind, but he didn’t. A wave of disappointment washed over you, though you managed to keep your voice steady as you declared, “We should break up.” Clay tensed in his seat, suddenly fixated on your words rather than the hours worth of footage he was editing. His chair turned with a quiet squeak as he swiveled around to face you. “What?” You sensed the subtle indignation of his tone as he squinted confusedly at your abrupt words. “We should break up.” You were much quieter this time, unable to meet his eyes as your words died silently in the tense air. You wrung your hands together anxiously as you leaned back on your heels, feeling awkward under Clay’s intense gaze. Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe you should’ve just stayed quiet and dealt with it. Maybe—
“Okay.” 
Immediately, your eyes flickered up to meet his, filled with a silent desperation as you searched his emerald irises for any indication of his intentions. Nothing. 
“Okay?”
Clay remained silent for a moment, his body stiff as he leaned back in his noisy chair. His expression was inscrutable as he stared at you blankly, trying to find the right words to say as he watched your face remain solemn at his confound brevity. His voice was level as he spoke, “I know I’ve been busy lately. We haven’t spent a lot of time together and that’s my fault. I could sit here and promise to change, but we both know I can’t—not right now.” Though you felt your heart shatter, you knew he was right. His job was too important, too time consuming.
A nod signaled your understanding and you turned to leave, feeling overwhelmingly dejected. 
“Hey.” You turned around to meet Clay’s eyes, noticing the hurt that was settled in them. “I hope you know I care about you.” You fought the urge to cry and shot him a watery smile, struggling to keep your tone unwavering as you agreed, “Me too.”
Two months had passed. 
Clay had been struggling. Everyone knew it—his friends, family, even his fans. It was clear that the once cheerful, happy man had become melancholy, suddenly depressed and unable to hide his unhappiness on camera. There had been numerous speculations of why this was, but only few knew the truth. Sapnap was among one of them and had been staying at Clay’s for the past month, creating content with his best friend while simultaneously making sure he was okay. Though two months had passed, Clay was still a mess. Perhaps it was because it hadn’t hit him that day. He had momentarily convinced himself that his career was more important than you, but deep down he knew that wasn’t true. He wanted so desperately to reach out to you, but assumed you had moved on—another incorrect belief of his. Clay cooped himself up in his home, never leaving unless it was urgent. He had sunken into a deep depression and the only remedy for his pain was you. You. He treated you so poorly. Everyday was a constant reminder of your absence and it was his fault. He could’ve made more time for you, or at least spent the free time he had with you. 
Remorseful thoughts ran through his head everyday, nearly driving himself crazy, and Sapnap knew he needed to get Clay out of the house. 
“There’s a party tonight, I think we should go.” Clay immediately denied the offer with a shake of his head, grumbling to himself. His best friend sighed indignantly, blowing out a breath of frustration before stating, “You don’t have a choice, you need to get out of the house.” Sapnap stood his ground, arms crossed as he stared at Clay sternly. A minute had passed and Clay, aware of his best friend’s stubbornness, gave in begrudgingly, “Fine, but only for an hour.” Sapnap grinned triumphantly, exiting the room with a smirk. He slammed the door behind him, heading back to his room while yelling, “And shave, for fuck sake.” Clay shook his head, cracking a small smile at his friend’s words.
The party was overwhelming to say the least. Bodies swarmed the crowded living room, reeking of alcohol and sweat. Music blared from a speaker, a shrill, nearly deafening melody that was sure to give Clay a headache by the end of the night. The room was buzzing with conversation, every word drowning out in the loud atmosphere. Almost immediately, Clay was passed a beer, and he lifted the bottle to his lips to take a swig. If Sapnap was going to make him stay here, he may as well take some edge off while doing so. A few minutes had passed and he finished the bottle, discarding it in a bin nearby. “I’m gonna go get another drink.” Clay muttered to Sapnap, who was talking loudly to a group of people he’d recognized. His best friend patted his back in response, chuckling as he gave him a playful shove towards the kitchen. Stumbling through the drunken crowd, Clay soon broke free as he neared his destination. He grabbed a beer, opening it skillfully off of the edge of a table, and turned around wordlessly. Taking a big sip, he hoped to free his mind from thoughts of you. Though he wasn’t one to drink, especially when upset, Clay knew that, aside from you, alcohol was the only other solution to temporarily mask his pain. He’d already drank half before he warned himself to slow down, knowing that if he got too drunk, he’d probably do something he regretted. Turning around so he could rejoin Sapnap, Clay nearly dropped his drink on the floor, feeling his heart drop. 
His eyes met yours. And then, he heard the music. 
I wanna be your vacuum cleaner
Breathin’ in your dust.
Clay felt his breath hitch in his throat, noticing the surprise in your eyes as you stared at him, astonished. As he stood there, staring at you shamelessly, he regretted it—everything. He regretted how he neglected you, ignored you, prioritized all of the wrong things when the only right thing in his life was right in front of him: you. Memories flashed before his eyes, quick and familiar, yet saddening all the same. The way you smiled at him from across the room when he was filming, the way you held him when he was stressed, the way you spoke to him, softly, while he was streaming to check up on him. Everything.
I wanna be your Ford Cortina
I will never rust
You looked away, suddenly nervous, though the eye contact was all-too-familiar. You felt your heart begin to race as you processed every detail of Clay’s face—from his anxious expression to the dark circles beneath his eyes. He looked like a mess. But so did you. You mirrored most of his tired, dejected qualities because you, too, were hurting. 
If you like your coffee hot
Let me be your coffee pot
Snapping you out of your daze, you felt a tug on your arm. “Hey, you alright?” Your friend asked worriedly. Nodding briskly, you muttered a quiet ‘yeah’ and smiled in a poor attempt to sound convincing. Seconds passed, and you could still feel the intensity of Clay’s burning gaze as your friend tugged you through the crowd, handing you a drink in the process. You dared to look up, instantly locking eyes with Clay, and swallowed thickly. You knew you couldn’t avoid him forever, not when he was looking at you like that—desperate, longing. 
You call the shots, babe
I just wanna be yours
Lifting up the red solo cup to your lips, you downed its contents quickly, eliciting a few laughs and impressed hollers from your friends. You were never the type to drink, but you felt that it was necessary, especially when you knew Clay was still staring at you intently. Downing another shot, you risked glancing up towards Clay, but he was gone. Suddenly anxious as a result of his absence, you surveyed the room. Nothing. “I’m gonna go get a drink.” You said before you could stop yourself, not giving your friends the chance to answer you before you ventured into the kitchen. You tried to dodge the swaying, drunken bodies as you made your way quickly into the room, frowning upon entry. Clay wasn’t there either. You sighed, frustrated, and grabbed a beer, struggling to open it. You nearly laughed at your incompetence, feeling sadly nostalgic despite the humor you found in your struggles—Clay had always opened your beers, then teased you for being incapable. You fought back an onslaught of tears at the memory and sighed deeply, leaning against the table with your head in your hands. 
Secrets I have held in my heart.
“Hey.” Your body jolted at the sound of his voice. Daring to turn around, you felt your chest constrict at the sight of him clutching your now-opened beer, a sad smile plastered on his tired features. 
Are harder to hide than I thought. 
“Hey.” You breathed. Clay passed the beer to your shaking hand, trying to ignore the way his fingers brushed against yours. Chewing on the inside of his cheek nervously as he tried to find the right words to say, Clay admitted, “I’m sorry.” A few quiet moments passed, though they felt like an eternity, and you replied simply,  “Don’t be.” You tried to hide the tremor that shook your arm as you took another swig of your beer, noticing how Clay’s face fell in sudden disappointment. What? Did you say the wrong thing? You didn’t want Clay to feel guilty, to blame himself for your failed relationship though it was mostly his fault. Why? Because you cared about him. You could immediately sense the despair that washed over him. And, though you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol coursing through your veins or the pure adrenaline from the moment, you hugged him. 
Maybe I just wanna be yours
I wanna be yours
I wanna be yours
Clay tensed at your touch, wondering if the beer had gotten to him or if this really was happening. It was. He soon wrapped his arms around your waist, grip purposeful as he tugged you into him. Your head rested against his chest, the steady thumping of his heartbeat in your ear far more of a melodic sound compared to any music you’d ever listened to.
Wanna be yours
Clay swayed the two of you softly, resting his chin atop your head. You clung to him tightly, shutting your eyes as he held you, gentle. “I missed you so much.” You admitted before your mind could even process it. Clay chuckled, lowering his head so his lips were close to your ear, “I missed you more, baby.” You tried to fight the grin that plastered itself on your face as you took in his words, squeezing his torso with such force you were sure he’d explode. Clay went to speak again, caressing your sides so gently you could barely feel it, before being interrupted. 
“Holy shit, there you are, dumbass!” 
Sapnap. 
Clay pulled away from you to glare at his best friend, trying to ignore the shit eating grin on Sapnap’s face as he glanced at you. “My bad, I didn’t mean to interrupt...whatever the hell I just interrupted. I just wanted to make sure you were alright, but you clearly are.” Before either of you could respond, he left, shooting his friend a thumbs up before disappearing into the crowd. You couldn’t help but laugh at the interaction, noticing the slight rosiness Clay’s cheeks had suddenly sported, embarrassed. “Sorry about that, he…” Clay struggled to find the perfect word to describe his best friend, but trailed off. “Yeah.” You agreed, seemingly understanding what he meant despite his silence. Clay laughed, then. The sound was music to your ears, and when his smile faded, the two of you were serious again. Clay’s hand found refuge in yours as he began to speak, his face solemn as he confessed, “I lied. I can change. I will right now if you want me to—I’d do anything for you.” 
Wanna be yours
You smiled lovingly at the man, interlocking the fingers of his hand that wasn’t already occupied in yours, and pulled him closer to you, wanting him near. 
Wanna be yours
“Deal.”
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