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#I guess it’s just an angst kind of night
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I Love You, It's Ruining My Life
Pairing: Azriel x Bestfriend! Reader
Summary: Azriel and Reader have been best friends for years, and slowly Reader starts to fall for him. He eventually feels the same way, but after Reader overhears a conversation she wasn’t meant to, she has doubts about him.
Based on this request! 🩷
Warnings: angst with a happy ending, a little swearing
Work Count: 5.2k
You twisted around in front of the mirror, trying to look at the dress from every angle. “What do you think, Az?”
Your friend looked at you, his eyes trailing down your body, and wrinkled his nose. “No.”
“Really?” You faced the mirror again, cocking your head. “I think it’s pretty.”
“It cinches weirdly around your middle,” he said.
You studied yourself in the mirror again, realizing he was right. “Wow. See, this is why I bring you along. Who knew your spymaster focus would be so helpful for fashion.”
He laughed, throwing his head back against the couch he was sitting on, and you couldn’t help but smile. You always felt a twinge of pride whenever you could make the stoic shadowsinger laugh like that.
“So this one, then?” You asked, gesturing to the first dress you had tried on earlier. 
“That is the one,” he shot you a lopsided smile. “The poor fool won’t know what hit him.”
Later, you plopped down into the chair next to Azriel’s in the sitting room at the House, groaning. 
Azriel arched a brow in question. 
“You were right,” you sighed. “He was a fool.”
Az poured you some of the amber liquid he was drinking, handing the glass to you. “What kind of fool? Do I need to defend your honor?” he asked, a hard edge to his voice.
Laughing dryly, you said. “No, nothing like that. Just a lame date. I can’t believe I bought a new dress for that guy.”
He smiled sadly at you. “Hey, the right guy will go crazy for that dress.”
You winced, taking a sip of the drink. “I guess,” you grumbled.
“Come here,” he said, opening his arms. “You know I won’t let you be all grumbly by yourself.” 
Smiling faintly, you rose from your seat and settled in his lap, resting your head on his shoulder, his arms wrapping comfortingly around you. 
“When’s it gonna happen for us, Az? When do we get to find what Rhys and Feyre have?” You asked, quietly. 
He sighed, leaning his cheek into the top of your head. “I don’t know. But at least you and I are alone together.” 
You laughed, and he tightened his arms around you slightly, clearly pleased. You felt your sad heart mending slightly as your best friend in the world held you long into the night.
---
A few days later, you sighed, pushing your food around your plate at lunch in Velaris with Azriel.
Azriel watched you, those hazel eyes calculating. “You’re not still moping about that date, are you?”
“I’m not moping,” you scolded him. “And no, of course it’s not about the date. He is not worthy of my sighs.”
The side of his mouth curved into a smile. “So, what is it then?”
Shrugging noncommittally, you said, “Honestly, I don’t know. I just feel…bummed.”
That smile of his dropped, his mouth thinning into a line. “Are you done eating?”
You blinked, confused. “Yeah, I think so.”
He tossed money onto the table, nodding his head to the side, indicating it was time to go. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?” You asked, rising to follow him.
“You’ll see,” he said, slinging his arm around your shoulders as you walked. 
It took several minutes before you knew what he was planning and you grinned up at him as you realized where he was leading you. 
He smiled, kissing the top of your head as you neared your favorite ice cream shop. 
Your heart swelled as Azriel ordered your favorite ice cream. You should have known. Your parents had always taken you here when you needed a pick-me-up, and Azriel had continued the tradition, knowing it always made you feel better, at least for a little bit.
Gazing up at the man who knew you so very well, your heart began to crack.
---
Azriel wrapped an arm around your shoulder as you settled on the couch beside him, tucking you against his side as his whole family roamed around the River House. 
It had been Feyre’s idea to get everyone together for an evening, just to spend time in each other’s company. 
“How are you?” he said, eyes boring into yours. He had been extra watchful of you lately, since your mood had dimmed weeks ago. He couldn’t understand why this dark cloud had been following you around lately. It broke his heart that he couldn’t fix it.
“Good,” you murmured, smiling faintly at him. 
His brow furrowed, but before he could question you further, Cassian plopped down on the other side of you, grinning.
Cassian pulled your attention then, telling an animated story about how training had been going in the Illyrian mountains. 
Azriel wasn’t really listening, still studying you. You laughed at something that Cassian had said, the sound bright, bouncing off the walls, your smile lighting up your face. The tightness in Azriel’s chest eased a bit.
Feyre and Elain beckoned you into the kitchen then, and you followed, leaving Azriel and Cassian alone in the sitting room for the moment. 
Cassian nodded after you, shooting Azriel a knowing look. “What’s the deal with her?”
“I don’t know,” Azriel said, sighing. “She’s been… off lately.”
Cassian looked contemplative. “Have you ever thought about… you know…” he raised his eyebrows suggestively.
“What, being with her? Romantically?” Azriel furrowed his brow.
“Yeah. I mean, you guys are cuddly enough.”
“Not like that, though,” Azriel said. “No, it’s never been like that between us.”
Cassian shrugged. “Okay. But, you never thought that you might be missing out?”
Azriel thought about it for a moment, what it would be like. “I don’t know. I’ve never thought about her like that.”
“Maybe you should.”
Before Azriel could respond, Nesta stalked into the room, taking Cassian’s attention completely. 
---
It had been months since you had come home from that terrible date, since Azriel had held you that night, since your mind and your heart began to wonder.
Azriel had always been your friend. Though he was beautiful and amazing, you had never before thought about being anything other than his friend. Nothing between you had really changed at all in the last few months, and yet… 
It was Azriel’s face in your mind as you fell asleep. It was Azriel’s touches that you dreamed of, over and over again. It was Azriel, who knew you so well, who was always, always there for you, that occupied your mind day in and day out.
You knew he had sensed a shift in you. But you didn’t think he understood what that shift was. That you had, without even really realizing it, fallen in love with him. 
Cauldron, you were doomed. 
“Where did you just go?” Feyre said, bringing you out of your thoughts.
“Nowhere,” you lied.
She narrowed her eyes at you, bouncing Nyx in her lap. 
“Okay, I actually really need to talk to somebody about this. But if I tell you, you can’t tell anybody, not even Rhys.”
Her eyes widened in surprise, but she nodded in agreement. 
“I kinda have feelings for Azriel.”
Feyre bit her lip, trying to hide her surprise. “Since when?”
You shrugged. “It happened slowly. Little things started sticking out to me all of a sudden and now… Now I can’t stop thinking about him. And I don’t know what to do.”
“You could tell him how you feel,” Feyre offered, smiling softly.
You groaned. “But I don’t think he sees me that way. If I tell him, it could ruin our whole friendship.”
Feyre tilted her head, contemplating. “You think so? Even if he doesn’t feel the same way, he’s Az. I can’t imagine that he would ever abandon someone he loves for any reason.”
“I guess,” you said distantly. “But it would make things really awkward, at the very least.”
Feyre smiled. “Or, it could turn into something amazing.”
You scoffed. “With our luck in love? Unlikely.”
“Maybe nothing has worked out for you two so far because you’re supposed to be together.”
Your heart swelled at the thought, but you stomped down the hope. “Maybe,” you said, your mind wandering again. “Maybe.”
---
Your blood rushed in your ears, your body tense as you and Azriel sat together in the sitting room of the House the next evening. It physically hurt to be near him these days. Your body ached to be close to his.
“What’s up with you?” Azriel asked.
“Nothing, I just…” you trailed off, looking across the room at him, willing yourself to tell the truth. “I love you, Az.”
He smiled. “I love you, too.”
He didn’t get it. He didn’t bat an eye at you, at his friend he had loved platonically for so long. Your heart sank. 
It hurt to look at him now. You knew it couldn't be the same between you, not now that you had foolishly fallen for him. 
You took a sip of your drink, wishing it was stronger, and forced yourself through easy conversation with your best friend. 
---
“What’s wrong?” you asked him immediately upon seeing him weeks later, and Azriel couldn’t help but smile. You had always been able to sense the shift in his mood, even if things had felt… different between the two of you lately.
He sighed. “We’re unlucky in love, you and I.”
You stiffened, and he wondered if he had said something wrong, but continued. “You know, the whole Mor, Elain…thing. I’ve just been thinking about what you said that night ages ago. I just wonder when it’ll happen for us.”
Azriel’s eyes flicked to you, and you gulped, tense in a way he’d never seen when it was just the two of you. “What is it?” he asked.
“Nothing,” you said, too quickly. “I’m sorry. That you’re feeling unlucky in love.”
He lifted a brow. “Are you okay?”
You nodded then stood up quickly, walking toward the door. Azriel stood, wrapping his fingers around your wrist, pulling gently so you would turn back to face him. “Hey. Talk to me,” he said softly.
Your eyes swam with emotion, and you seemed to be pondering what to say. “I can’t talk to you about this,” you said quietly, your voice breaking.
“What do you mean?” Azriel tried to push down the hurt he felt. “We talk about everything.”
“Not this, Az,” you said sadly, before gently pulling your hand out of his grasp and disappearing down the hallway.
What the hell. 
Azriel spent nearly an hour contemplating what had just happened. Were you upset with him? Or were you just keeping something from him? If you were, why?
He ran over the last several weeks in his mind, all of his interactions with you. You had definitely been acting differently around him, sitting further away from him, not spending as much time with him one-on-one, but he assumed you would talk to him when you were ready. Evidently, you still were not ready. But, what could it possibly be that you couldn’t talk to him about it?
It was your relationships, well your lack of relationship with Mor and Elain that seemed to set this off. 
And then he remembered what Cassian had said weeks ago, that maybe he should consider you as a romantic partner. His brother was always smarter than most people gave him credit for. Did Cassian know something? Was he trying to tell Azriel?
His head spun. Did you have feelings for him?
It would actually explain a lot of your behavior for the past few weeks, especially if you thought that he didn’t feel the same way. 
Did he feel the same way?
He sat back in his chair. Why hadn’t he ever considered you before? You were beautiful, of course, and one of the very best people he had ever known. And you were his best friend, who knew him better than he knew himself, in many ways. Who he could talk to about anything. Who already loved him so much. 
Maybe he should be with you. 
He did love you, of course. So… maybe the two of you should give it a shot.
Before he could think it through, he went to your room, knocking gently. He had to know if he was right.
You answered the door in a thin night dress, your hair cascading down your shoulders. Gods, you were beautiful. What an idiot he'd been.
“Az?” You asked.
Before he could talk himself out of it, he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling your body into his. He gauged your reaction, waiting for you to tense, but you didn't. You melted into him, placing your hand on his chest and gazing up at him with big, beautiful eyes.
Slowly, so slowly, he leaned down, and you tilted your face up to meet him, longing written all over your face. His heart rate spiked as his lips finally met yours.
The kiss was slow, sweet, exploratory. A new dance between old friends. 
You moaned slightly, twining your fingers into his hair, pulling him closer to you.
He growled, pushing you back further into your bedroom, kicking the door shut with his foot.
You had a long night ahead of you.
---
It had been about a week since you and Azriel had stepped into a new form of your relationship.
It was funny, actually. Not that much had actually changed, except you were more comfortable around him now, like you had been before the last few weeks had complicated things. The two of you spent so much time together one on one before, the only difference now was all the kissing and the bedroom activities. And how many times you would tell him that you loved him, your eyes shining with that love.
He was starting to feel like he hadn't thought it all the way through. He loved you. Of course he did. But, he was worried that your love for him was deeper. And he couldn't bear the thought of hurting you.
“Where'd your mind go, Az?” Cassian asked, and Rhysand chuckled.
“He's thinking about his new girlfriend,” Rhys grinned.
Azriel’s jaw tightened. “I'm worried,” he admitted.
“About?” Cassian asked, leaning forward, his full attention on Azriel.
“I think her feelings are deeper than mine. I'm starting to worry that I may have…” he trailed off, not wanting to admit it.
“Settled?” Rhys offered.
Azriel winced, but nodded. “Maybe.”
“What, you don't love her?” Cassian asked.
“I do. Of course I love her.”
“Well, there you go,” Cassian said, waving a hand dismissively. “I think you're overthinking this.”
“Maybe just give it time,” Rhysand said contemplatively. “You know how she is. She feels things very deeply. You might catch up to her faster than you think.”
“Maybe. I hope so,” Azriel said, his mind wandering away again, back to you. Back to the love that shone in your eyes when you looked at him.
He would have to be careful. He would not break your heart. He wouldn't be able to live with himself.
---
Years later, snuggled up to Azriel, watching children screaming and running around the River House the night before Winter Solstice, you couldn’t imagine being happier. 
Azriel and you had been talking about trying for children soon. Your heart swelled as you watched Cassian’s and Rhysand’s children grow up together, picturing your own children growing up in all this love, with cousins and aunts and uncles who would love them so much.
You smiled and Azriel kissed your temple. “I know exactly what you’re thinking,” he murmured into your skin. 
“You do not,” you smiled.
“I do,” he said, ducking his head to whisper in your ear. “You wanna try for a baby tonight?” His breath tickled your ear, his voice dipping suggestively. 
You laughed, playfully shoving him away, and he grinned. “Tonight? The one night a year we sleep under the same roof as our entire family? Absolutely not.” 
He pulled you into his lap, kissing you sweetly. “Tomorrow then?” he whispered. 
You rolled your eyes, but your heart swelled with love. “We’ll see,” you teased. 
Elain called you into the kitchen then, and you went to join her, shooting a wink at Az over your shoulder as you went. He grinned.
Your family was scattered all over the house, leaving Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel alone in the living room next to the kitchen with some of the children.
You could hear them laughing together as you helped Elain prep some of the food for the following morning. 
Your ears perked up when you heard your name and Elain shot you a curious look, clearly eavesdropping along with you.
“Remember when you two first got together?” Rhysand asked, likely to Azriel.
“Yes,” Az chuckled softly. “We’ve come a long way since then.”
“I can’t believe you were ever unsure about her,” Cassian said. “That you were worried you had settled.”
Shock jolted through your entire body, your blood pounding in your ears. You nearly dropped the plate that you were holding.
“I was a fool,” Azriel said, and you could picture him shaking his head slightly. “I can’t imagine life without her. I can’t believe I lasted so long just being her friend.”
“She’s got you wrapped around her little finger,” Rhysand teased. 
“Oh, like you’re not the same with Feyre,” Azriel shot back, and all three brothers erupted into laughter. 
You looked at Elain finally, her expression solemn, like she could see right through to your soul, how broken you felt. 
Without a word, you left the kitchen, going up to the guest room that you and Azriel occupied when you stayed with Feyre and Rhysand. 
Azriel had settled for you. He was sad that night that he first kissed you, sad about not getting a shot with Mor or Elain, so he had gone to the one person he knew would never deny him. 
All this time, all these years, he had just been settling with you because he didn’t want to be alone. You felt sick.
You had fallen in love with him, and to him you were just there. Ready for the taking. That’s why he chose you. 
Your stomach lurched, and you scrambled to the bathroom, spilling your guts, hot tears streaming down your face, sobs shaking your whole body.
---
Azriel frowned sometime later, wondering why you hadn’t come back yet. He wandered away from his brothers, finding Elain alone in the kitchen. She frowned at him as he entered, looking angrier than he had ever seen her. 
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Why don’t you go ask your wife?”
He furrowed his brow. “What do you mean? Where is she?”
“She went upstairs a while ago,” Elain said curtly, turning back to her pastries. 
Azriel’s heart pounded. What had happened to make Elain angry at him? Why had you gone upstairs without saying goodnight to anyone? 
He rushed up to the room, confused when he didn’t see you anywhere, until he heard you sniffling in the washroom. His heart lurched, panic setting in as he swung the door open, finding you lying on the floor, hugging your legs to your chest, facing away from him. 
He whispered your name, his anxiety increasing. When you didn’t answer, he sat down next to you, rubbing your back soothingly, gently setting your head into his lap. He saw your tear stained cheeks, your red eyes, and the breath was sucked right out of his lungs.
“What happened, love? What is it?” he asked, trying to sound calm.
You refused to look at him, staring ahead blankly. 
He had never seen you like this. “Honey, you’re scaring me, please tell me what’s wrong,” he said, his voice breaking. 
Finally, you sat up and walked back into the bedroom, still not looking at him. As you did, you mumbled, “you settled.”
“What?” he asked, following you into the bedroom. 
You slid under the covers, facing away from him. “You settled with me. You didn’t want to be alone, so you kissed me that night. And you settled with me.”
“I didn’t,” he said, quietly. “I did not settle. I love you. So much.”
You buried yourself further into the covers, hiding yourself from him. His heart ached. “All this time,” you whispered. “All this time. You must have been just waiting for Mor or Elain to change their minds, huh?”
“No,” he said, his voice coming out quiet and crackly. He rounded the bed, willing you to look at him. He settled on his knees, looking into your eyes, cupping your cheek with a scarred hand. “No. It was never like that. It was never about them. I love you, I always have,” he said, willing you to believe him, to feel that he meant it. 
A tear slid down your cheek. His heart broke further as he wiped it away gently with his thumb. “That’s not what Cassian said,” you whispered.
Azriel sighed, his eyes pleading. “I was worried. When we first started dating, I was worried that your feelings were deeper than mine. You always feel things so deeply, my love, and that’s one of the things that I love the most about you. I was scared that I wasn’t at the same level that you were, and you would get hurt because of it.”
“Looks like I have,” you whispered. 
“But it’s not like that now, it hasn’t been like that for years. I’ve known for so long that you are the only person in the world that I could ever want. Please,” Azriel whispered. “Please believe that I am so in love with you. It was one stupid conversation ages ago, and I’m so sorry that I hurt you, but you have to believe me. You are the love of my life.”
“I don’t know how to believe you right now,” you said quietly, your voice breaking. 
Azriel’s heart broke completely. Your face was completely blank in a way he had never seen before. “What can I do?” 
“I don’t know, Az. I need -- I need space.”
He gulped, but nodded, rising to his feet slowly “Okay. I’ll be downstairs, if you need me.”
You didn’t respond. He willed his legs to move, to leave you behind, broken, in the bed you were supposed to share.
Cassian and Rhys were the only people left downstairs by the time he made it back down, drinking and laughing together. 
One look at their brother’s face, and they went silent.
“I fucked up,” Azriel said, taking the glass from Cassian’s hand and shooting the amber liquid back in one gulp.
Cassian handed Azriel the whole bottle, who would have laughed, if he hadn’t ripped his own heart to shreds that night.
He took a swig before saying quietly, “she heard our conversation. She thinks I settled with her.”
“Shit,” Cassian said, his face falling. 
“What did you tell her?” Rhys asked, his expression solemn too.
“The truth. I was worried that in the beginning that she loved me more than I loved her, but now… Gods, I’m so in love with her. But she said she can’t trust me anymore,” he said, a tear running down his cheek before he quickly wiped it away.
His brothers were silent for a moment, thinking. 
After a moment, Cassian said, “Yeah, I don’t know how you fix this, Az.”
Azriel laughed humorlessly, taking another sip from the bottle. “Thanks.”
“She might just need some time,” Rhysand said. 
“You didn’t see her,” Azriel said, his voice breaking again. “She was…” he trailed off and shook his head. “I’ve never seen her like that. She’s wrecked. Because of me.” 
His brothers stayed up with him for a long time, trying to console him, but he eventually sent them away to their happy mates who still loved them. 
He laid on the couch, his wings drooping on the floor, his heart hurting. He hadn’t spent a night away from you since you had gotten together unless he was on a mission. This felt fundamentally wrong.
Eventually, he got up, wandering through the quiet house. He made his way into the study, digging out some paper. He had to fix this. He needed you to understand. 
---
You’d barely slept at all, and winced when the sun started lightly filtering into the room that shouldn’t be so empty. 
You didn’t know how to feel, what to think. You knew Azriel loved you. But was it enough? Was it the same, all-consuming love that you felt for him? 
How could you ever be sure?
After just one night, you missed the heat of his body against yours, hated rolling over to see the other side of the bed empty. 
Cauldron, you had been talking about children less than 12 hours ago, and now…
You shoved the thought away, your eyes still burning from crying all night. You refused to start up again. 
What a Winter Solstice this would turn out to be. Maybe you should just go home.
Alone, in the apartment that you had turned into a home with Azriel. Your bottom lip trembled, and you bit it, hard. You were strong, you would survive this. 
Whatever this ended up being.
Your mind was still spinning and you hadn’t yet gotten out of bed when there was a tentative knock on your door. 
“What?” you said, quietly, your voice not sounding like your own.
Azriel opened the door slowly, studying you as he lingered in the doorway. He looked awful, bags under his eyes, his clothes rumpled, his hair a mess, like he had run his hand through it over and over again. 
“Hey,” he said quietly. 
“Hi,” you replied timidly.
His face fell and you knew why. You had never sounded like that, not with him. 
He took a cautious step into the room, watching you closely. “I made something. For when you're ready,” he said, placing a stack of papers on the bedside table. 
You remained silent, not sure what to say. He swallowed, and turned to leave, but he stopped in the doorway, turning back to you. “I do love you. So much.”
His expression was pained, and you could tell he wanted to say more, but he just looked at you sadly before disappearing behind the door he closed behind him. 
It wasn’t until after you took a long bath that you had the courage to look at the papers he had left for you. You sat on the bed, pulling them into your lap, surprised at how many pages there were. 
On the top, in Azriel’s handwriting it said, “To My Dearest Love.”
Despite everything, you couldn’t stop the swell in your chest, the love that you felt for him. 
You were shocked as you read through page after page. He had written your story, the story of your love from his perspective, every date you had gone on, every Winter Solstice, every milestone. He detailed his thoughts as he went through each of those moments, all the things he loved about you, when he noticed new little things about you, even after being friends for so long. 
Tears were streaming down your face by the time you got to the end, where it read: 
You, my love, are everything. Everything. If you’ll let me, I’ll spend the rest of our lives proving it to you. 
I’m sorry that I was a fool. I’ll always be sorry that I hurt you. 
Whatever you decide, whatever you want going forward, I just hope that you’ll know how deeply I love you. 
---
Azriel had gone to the annual snowball fight with his brothers, only for a distraction. But his heart wasn’t in it, and after about ten minutes, his brothers had deemed his snowball game so pathetic that they called it off and all went inside to the cabin to drink. 
He knew he was being tragic company, so Azriel went back to the River House on his own, prepared to find a quiet corner to sulk in by himself. He hoped you had read what he stayed up all night writing, at least. Even if it didn’t change anything… 
He didn’t let himself dwell on what could happen. He didn’t know what he would do if you left him. 
He nearly fell over when he noticed that you were sitting in the living room that he had used his shadows to winnow into. 
You looked surprised too, but not unhappy. Relief flooded through him. 
“Hi,” you said, quietly. 
“Hi,” he said, his voice raspy. 
You stood up, walking toward him slowly, stopping a few steps from him. He longed to hold you, to make it all better, but he stayed where he was.
“I read it,” you whispered. 
He could only nod, his heart in his throat. 
Tears welled up in your eyes, and his heart shattered, terror flooding through him before you closed the distance between you, wrapping your arms around him, burying your face in his chest. 
He hugged you back instantly, holding you to him with crushing force. 
“I don’t want to be mad at you anymore,” you said into his chest. “I love you.”
Azriel felt like he was going to fall over, the only thing that was keeping him standing was you. “I love you,” he said, letting the tears fall freely down his cheeks, resting his chin on the top of your head. “I love you, I’m so sorry.”
You shook your head. “You don’t have to be sorry. I get it now. What you wrote -- it helped me understand. And it was beautiful.”
“I’m still sorry I hurt you,” he said, his voice cracking.
You stood on your tiptoes to kiss him gently. “It’s okay, Az. I’m okay.”
Azriel took your face in his hands gently, kissing you like his life depended on it. He felt like it did. 
You let him kiss you for ages, until the two of you realized that you were no longer alone. Azriel looked up to see that his brothers had winnowed in and were now staring at the two of you. 
“Oh, thank the Mother,” Cassian said, bracing his hands on his knees dramatically before coming up and hugging you, lifting you into the air, while Rhys laughed behind him. “You guys really had me worried.”
“I take it you worked it all out?” Rhysand asked, kissing your cheek after Cassian set you back on the ground. 
“Yeah, we’re okay now,” you said, laughing at them.
Rhysand and Cassian did look extremely relieved, which made Azriel’s heart swell. He would always be thankful for his brothers. 
---
After a surprisingly successful Winter Solstice, you and Azriel made your way back home, now cuddling together in your bed, holding each other tightly. 
Azriel kissed the top of your head. “I’ll always be so thankful for you. I don’t know how I got so lucky.”
You snuggled closer into him. “We’re both lucky.”
Azriel laughed. “Speaking of getting lucky… you want to try for that baby now?”
You gawked at him, incredulously. “What, too soon?” he asked, smirking.
“Males are ridiculous,” you scolded him. 
After a beat, Azriel risked it. “I didn’t hear a no…”
You laughed, pulling him into a kiss. “You’re so stupid.”
Azriel grinned. “Oh, I know.”
@thalia-as-blog @saltedcoffeescotch @batboyrhyrhy @1-s1mp-t00-much
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rainylana · 3 days
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“Don’t cry.”
Eddie Munson x female reader
summary: a spa session with your new boyfriend turns out to be both of your breaking points.
requested by anonymous! i hope you like it and that I did it justice! i kind of took it and ran. i made it much more deep than i initially planned, so i hope you like it!
warnings: talk of sexual abuse and rape, with both eddie and reader, angst and tears, language, mentions of drug dealing and absent parents. reader is struggling to connect with eddie and he doesn’t know why, kinda leaves in a cliffhanger??
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Sometimes Eddie wondered if you liked him, because half the time it didn’t seem like you did. You’d become stand-offish, quiet, shrink in on yourself. His “Are you okay?” was always met with an “I’m fine.” and nothing more. It always seemed like you were protecting yourself. Not just from him, but from everyone. You loved his friends, but sometimes they scared you. You never knew who to trust. Would one of them hurt you, given the chance?
One thing was for sure though, you loved Wayne. He was like the father you never had growing up. From the way he talked, looked, his personality, it reminded you of a father. Eddie was extremely lucky to grow up with him while he did.
Eddie wasn’t stupid, however, he knew some of your behavior had to do with your upbringing. You’d shared some of it with him before, time and time again, here and there. You’d grown up pretty similarly to him. Dead beat parents that abused you, surrounded by their friends who eyed you like a piece of meat for them to chew on. When you grow up like that, you’re bound to be a little messed up. Eddie understood that. He was the same way.
But with you, it was different. He didn’t want you to feel that way around him. The relationship hadn’t been going on for that long and was still fairly fresh, but he wanted you to trust him. And even dating might have been a stretch, you were just very good friends who weren’t very good friends with anyone else.
You liked Eddie, maybe even loved him, but there was no lying when it came to the fact you were struggling to connect with him. Could you really trust him? Was he just like the men from your childhood? Would he fuck you and ultimately leave once he got his full satisfaction? You’d cried yourself to sleep many of times during the night at the thought.
Sometimes you didn’t feel safe. Not with him, not with his friends. You only ever felt truly safe with Wayne. You didn’t know why. You hated the way you felt. Eddie was a good man. He was good to you. He had yet to do anything that proved otherwise. But the dark corners of your mind lingered closer and closer to the edge, reminding you of what once was your reality on the daily. You hoped this time it was different.
“I like this color on you.” Eddie’s tongue was stuck out in concentration, one hand holding your foot, the other holding the brush of the pink nail polish bottle. “It’s cute.”
“Pink?” You smirked. “You like pink?”
“On you.” His lashes fluttered up to you briefly.
The gesture was cute, but anytime he did something sweet like this you couldn’t help but think if he was luring you into a trap. Your stomach was littered with jitters and nerves. Day by day your anxiety was staring to become more out of control. You thought about ending things with him. It wasn’t fair to him to not give the relationship your all, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You’d miss him dearly.
“Well, thanks.” You smiled softly. “I don’t like painting them by myself. The angle is too hard.”
He muttered a Mhm with his tongue out, blowing on your little toe so the pain would dry. “I used to paint my nails black when I was a teenager.” He said.
“Really?” You said amusedly. “Why’d you stop?”
“Got out of the habit, I guess.” He dipped the brush back in the bottle. “Plus, not that I cared, but kids at school were givin’ me shit about it.”
You knew Eddie had the same childhood you did, in some sense anyways. Eddie wouldn’t talk about it much, especially never about his mother. But his dad was something you knew struck a nerve. You should share your traumas together, that’s what you always told yourself. You knew you both could relate to one another, but the relationship was still too fresh. Maybe neither was ready for that.
“Want me to do your fingers?” Eddie asked, blowing on your last toe as he finished up his fine work. “I gotta say, babe, I did pretty good.”
You flexed your freshly painted toes and grinned at his work. “You did! Thank you.”
He put the bottle on the table and plopped down beside you on the couch, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “So what now? What’s next on the spa list?” He smirked and you did the same, laughing breathily.
“I won’t make you succumb to all my girly stuff.” You laughed. “Anything I can do for you? Your hair looks like it needs brushed a little.”
“What?” He gave you an incredulous look. “I keep my hair very much maintained, thank you.”
“I didn’t say you didn’t, Eddie.” You rolled your eyes. “All I said was it needed brushed a little.”
You hopped up and got your plastic hairbrush from the bathroom, pointing at him with it when you returned. “Your turn to be pampered. Sit on the floor.”
He shook his head amusedly and sat down where you had, your legs falling at the sides of his shoulders as you gently began combing out his curls. He didn’t mean to, but he sighed in content.
“Feel good?” You gave a shit eating grin.
“You’re a-lot gentler than Wayne used to be.” He relaxed under your touch. “He always pulled at my hair and got it more ratted up than it already was. This feels good.”
You smiled at the mention of Wayne. “Well, I’ve got a woman’s touch, honey.”
“Yes, you do.”
It was quiet and peaceful for a while as you brushed his hair, the both of you content in the silence. When he touched your ankle, caressing it, your heart began to pound. You hadn’t had sex with him yet. You were too scared to. You knew it was time, it had been almost two months and you knew Eddie had long since been ready to sleep with you.
It wasn’t that you didn’t want to. You did. You fantasized about him just as much as he did you, but you were terrified of him leaving once you finally crossed that line. Out of instinct, you brought your legs up to you, sitting criss-cross like he was.
You heard him sigh and your stomach ached with guilt. You should give him what he wants.
“I’m sorry.” You say guiltily.
“You never let me touch you.” Eddie said flatly, staring at the ground as you continued to brush his hair. “And you won’t tell me why.”
Your eyes teared up and you stopped brushing, bringing it down to your lap. “I’m sorry.”
“That’s all you say.” He shook his head. “You don’t need to be sorry. You just need to tell me why I scare you so bad.”
“You don’t.” You denied, trying your hardest to convince him. When he said things like this, you felt foolish for thinking the way that you did. “It’s just- it’s- it’s just me.”
Eddie turned around, looking up at you to find you with tears in your face. “If it wasn’t true you wouldn’t be crying. Don’t I deserve the truth, Y/n? Have I don’t anything at all to make you scared of me?”
“No.” You sniffled, getting off the couch to go into the kitchen of his trailer. “You haven’t.”
Eddie watched you, becoming more and more anxious by the second. He sat there, waiting for his answer, anything but no. “Do you want to break up?”
“No!” You cried, shaking your head wildly. “No, that’s not what I want.”
“You don’t even like me, Y/n.” He scoffed to himself, closing in, becoming cold and shutting down. Something he hadn’t done in a long time. “You won’t open up to me. I can barely touch you. You look like you’re disgusted to be around me.”
“That’s not true!” You snapped, taking a step toward him. “Stop saying shit like that!”
“Then you say something for a change!” He argued back, not moving from his spot on the floor.
“But it’s so stupid!” You shook your head. “It’s ridiculous!”
He gave you a look. He was waiting and he wouldn’t back out this time. Either that, or he was going to break up with you. The thought made you want to vomit. Maybe you did care more deeply for him than you were letting on.
“We don’t talk about what happened when we were kids,” You sighed through tears, voice breaking. “We’re..both the same, but we don’t talk about it.”
Eddie’s eyes narrowed as you began, wondering after all, if he wanted to hear where you were going with this.
“Mom wasn’t around, so that left dad and his friends.” You stared at him, being as open and honest as you could now. There was no beating around the bush with this. “I…Jesus,” You shook your head, running a hand through your hair. “I didn’t know that it wasn’t normal at the time, but they’d…they’d use me.” You took a deep breath after the last word. No stopping now.
“They would play poker, touch me, rape me.” You weren’t crying anymore, talking mostly to yourself now at this point. “And I know you would never do that to me, Eddie, but sometimes I’m so afraid of it happening again and I just shut down.” You closed your eyes. “You touch me and I’m so afraid you’ll abandon me once we sleep together. That’s all anyone has ever done in my life.”
“Fuck me, then leave.” You sniffled. “That’s all they ever do.”
Eddie’s eyes were drooping, slightly narrowed and brows furrowed. He shook his head softly, you almost missed it, and you knew you’d made him at a loss for words.
He looked up to you briefly, licking his lips before he spoke. “There was this one guy my dad would deal for,” He began. “He was a big dude, almost seven foot. I was only thirteen. But dad would bring him into the house and he…would look at me. Just watch me wherever I went.” He stared at his hands, not daring to look at you.
“I think he payed dad.” His voice broke, but he refused to let any tears fall. “Because I screamed and screamed and he wouldn’t come.”
You let out an audibly gasp and covered your mask, your heart falling to the floor with a splat.
“Oh, god, Eddie,” You crawled to the floor and knelt beside him.
“It’s okay.” He stopped your apologies. “I didn’t tell you for you to be sorry for me. I told you because you need to know you’re not alone, and not everyone is out to get you. You’re safe with me. I want you to believe that.”
You let out a wet sob, tears rolling down your red face. “How do I stop being scared? I want to be with you.”
He smiled softly, a finger swiping at a tear. “We have all the time in the world for that, angel.”
You grabbed his arm and laid your head against his shoulder, sobbing like a broken child.
“Oh, baby,” He kissed your forehead. “Don’t cry.”
It would be a long road to recovery, but you could both do it together. Slowly, every day you would both open up to each other about what you went through, and day by day, it would get easier.
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plutoispurplw · 2 days
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Guilty As Sin?
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Summary: You are new at the bau and you finally meet Spencer, you fall for him but he started to avoid you.
Couple: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader
Words: 2.2K
Warnings: Smut, little angst, legal age gap of ten years (35 & 27), happy ending.
A/N: Hi everyone, guess who is back! This is inspired by Guilty as Sin by my favorite blonde. Stream The Tortured Poets Department.
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When you began to work at the BAU, Penelope had told you that one of the members of the team was in prison, she said that he was innocent. 
Months later, when he was out of jail you finally met him, you were mesmerized by him, he looked like something out of your wildest dreams. 
You notice the dark circles under his eyes and how he looks tired but still, you are under a spell by him. 
"Hello, nice to meet you, Dr.Reid, my name is Y/N" You were acting like looking at his eyes was nothing while you felt how your heart was beating like crazy. 
If he noticed it he didn't make an effort to say something about it. "Nice to meet you too and you don't have to call me doctor" He gave you an awkward smile, that was instantly engraved in your brain. 
Even if you were attracted to him, that didn't mean that the age gap between you two was uncomfortable, it was weird to try to have a conversation with him, there wasn't any type of conversation themes to have. 
But as time went by, the age gap seemed to be less uncomfortable, you began to open up a little more to him and vice versa, the conversations you both started to have were nice, and you liked to listen to his ramblings. 
After some more time, you two started to go to a café in your free time to talk, when you talked about something that you liked he gave you his attention, and he didn't make you feel weird. 
Then it started the glances, the quick brushes against each other. The tension was growing like crazy, but only happened when you two were alone. 
Something magnetic was pulling you towards him, maybe was destiny or chemistry but it didn't matter, because you couldn't escape from that feeling. 
When you touched yourself, you would fantasize about him, but how could you be guilty if he hadn't touched you yet? 
Only in your mind, his name was written on your inner upper thigh. 
And finally, the tension just broke one night. 
After solving a case and being back home, the team went to a bar to relax after those stressful days. You were tired and you asked Spencer to take you home, and he accepted. 
When you were at the entrance of the apartment and were about to say goodbye, you felt how his gaze was fixed on your lips, you couldn't stop looking at him like a lovesick teenager at that moment. 
Then it snapped, he stole you a kiss, and you reciprocated it, you felt the passion and desperation that he put on the kiss, your whole body burning because of the need for his touch. 
The kiss didn't last too long because then he pulled away, and regret was written on his face. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." Before you could say something he was gone, you just lay on the bed until you fell asleep with thoughts running through your mind. 
After that, he started to avoid you if it wasn't important like you were some kind of plague that could kill him. 
You started to think if you did something wrong but nothing came to your mind. 
You felt hurt and after a time you didn't try to make amends for something that you were sure you didn't break anymore, it was better if you were alone or that was what you tried to tell yourself. 
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After some time, in a case. The team was staying in a hotel like always, you were in your room when you noticed that the air-conditioning wasn't working, you went to the lobby to ask for another room but they told you that there weren't any more rooms available 
It was summer and you knew that wouldn’t sleep with the heat. 
You decided to ask Spencer to share because his room was the closest one to you, that was what you tried to think, but deep inside you knew that the true reason was to just be close to him. 
You knocked on the door, and moments later she opened it, he was sleeping in sweatpants and a shirt. His went wide when he saw that it was you.
"Hi, Y/N" His voice sounded deep like have been sleeping before you knocked. The door. He looks at you in the eyes with shame and guilt. "What do you need?" 
"Sorry for waking you up but the air-conditioning doesn't work and there aren't more rooms available so I was wondering if you let me sleep here? Tomorrow I'm gonna ask for another room." 
"Okay, don't worry, I leave you the bed and I sleep on the floor so you can be comfortable." He sounded sincere and you felt how you were falling again for him. 
"We can share the bed, we just put a pillow between us, what do you think?" You look at him with puppy eyes so he can sleep on the bed and don't wake up in the morning with pain in the back.
He just gave you a nod and let you enter, you two started to accommodate the bed again so the two could be comfortable, and while doing that you started to speak again. "What happened that ni-" 
He interrupted you and didn't let you talk. "Let's just forget about that please, I'm tired and you're tired." His voice sounds annoyed by your words. 
You looked from the bed to his eyes. "Stop trying to avoid the theme like it's some kind of explosive, please let's just talk." Your voice sounded like you were begging and maybe you were but you just needed to know why he avoided you like the plague. 
At that moment something snapped inside of him. "I don't want to fucking talk about that Y/N" His voice was louder and now he sound angry at you. 
In other circumstances, you would stay quiet but you were tired from all of this, you didn't want to see him every morning in the office knowing that he didn't want to have any interaction with you like before that night. 
Now you were the one yelling, all the pent-up anger spilled on your words. "Well I need to know why you have been avoiding me like I'm some kind of fucking bad drug for you, I prefer to spend all night awake uncomfortable than being here." You immediately felt guilty of saying something like that to him knowing his past but you didn't say anything and started to walk towards the door. 
Then to your surprise, he stopped you in your tracks grabbed you by the wrist, pulled you towards him, and started to speak. "You know why I been avoiding you? Because if I let you get more closer I won't be able to stop." 
His eyes fixed on yours like they were some kind of gems. "I want to make you mine, I want to consume all of you, you're a drug for me that I know if I taste it's gonna be the death of me." 
He stepped back and stopped grabbing your wrist. "But it wouldn’t be fair, I have more experience than you, your frontal lobe got fully developed two years ago and mine almost a decade ago." 
Before he continued talking you were the one interrupting him this time, you got closer to him. "I want you to be the one to ruin me, I have been thinking of you since I met you, it feels like I'm under a spell that makes me need you, I need to wake every morning next to you." 
In seconds you were kissing each other like it was your last moment on earth, the kiss was filled with desperation and pent-up passion from months accumulated. 
His hands were everywhere making you moan against his neck while you kissed him. 
He pulled away from you and sat on the edge of the bed, his hands pulled towards him making you fall on his lap. 
Your lips against his jaw and neck, his hands started to descend towards your hips carefully and slowly to not startle you like you were some kind of animal. 
Then he started to talk again and you didn't have more patience left. "Are you sure you want this? We could stop if you-" You stopped him before he continued talking. 
"I wanna do it, Spencer, I'm sure" He stopped in his tracks and then his lips were against yours again in a passionate and intense kiss. 
He continued to descend his hands until they were on the waistband of your shorts, he looked you in the eyes, and you just gave a little nod to let him know that was okay to do it. 
He started to pull it down in a slow motion to make you more desperate,  now he could see your lacy underwear. You didn't know if it was worse for him than for you to wait. 
You stood up and took the shorts off completely, then you took your T-shirt off too. His eyes laser-focused on your chest when he realized that you weren't wearing a bra or anything. 
You blushed at his indiscreet gaze and tried to cover yourself but he pulled you towards him again, you fell on his lap again, and his hands were quick to move from your hips towards your breasts. 
He just started to caress them playing with your nipples. "You look so beautiful like this." His kisses started from your neck to your chest, his mouth was on one while the other was being massaged by his other hand. 
After minutes like this, he switched giving attention to your neglected breast. You were just a mess already, letting out little moans and sighs. 
You felt how his hands were on your hips again, then he lay you down on the bed carefully like you were made of crystal. He raised from the bed and then he got on his knees getting a gasp of surprise from your lips. "You don't have to do that if you don't want to." 
"But I want to, I want to see if you can come just from my hands and mouth or if you're gonna need more." His words made you feel a chill run down your spine. 
His hands spread your legs open letting him see how the underwear was wet from your arousal. "Look at this, you were really desperate for my touch, didn't you?" You just gave him a nod in response. 
He took your underwear in seconds so that you were sure that he tear it apart but it didn't matter anymore, you were just focused on his breath against your cunt. 
He started to kiss your inner thighs while his middle finger and index finger entered you and started to move inside you. Moans started to escape from your lips. 
Then his mouth was on your clit making you were seeing stars, saying his name like a mantra, you felt the knot on your stomach starting to get tighter until it exploded and you scream his name, you felt how every wave of pleasure washed over your entire body. 
He got up from his position and you see how he started to to take off his sweatpants and his boxers, you help him take his shirt off. 
All the clothes were scattered on the floor. 
You lay down on the bed again spreading your legs open, he got between your legs, and you could feel his member brushing against your folds teasingly. 
"Please, Spencer, I need to feel you inside." Now you were sure you were begging him to be inside you, you needed it and he need it too. 
In a moment he pushed slowly inside you, and you felt him deep inside you. In his perspective, you were a complete mess, cheeks of a scarlet tone and moans escaping from your rosy lips. 
"You look so pretty, you feel so good, angel." His voice was an octave lower than usual making you shiver. His eyes were full of affection for you. 
He pulled almost out and then his hips snapped against yours making you moan so loud that you were sure that the other persons were hating you two by all the noise. 
The bed started to move with the movement of your bodies, the wood headboard was hitting against the wall again and again, the room full of the noise of moans and curses, and the smell of love. 
He moved to be closer to you and started to whisper sweet nothings against your lips and neck, moans of his name escaping of your lips along pleads of never stop. 
Then everything went quiet when the two of you felt the knot snapped. He pulled out and kissed your forehead with love and you gave him a giggle. 
"I love you" He whispered against your hair while he covered your bodies with the sheets hiding the mess that both of you made. 
"I love you too." You whispered against his neck and gave him a little kiss, now you felt at peace.
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ivrmmx · 7 hours
Text
Hybrid! Heeseung
Chapter 4: Don’t ignore me.
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Pairing: Hybrid! Heeseung x reader
Warnings: really angst (might hurt a bit), Jealous h Heeseung, cussing, Heeseung gets slightly violent, angst to fluff (kinda), reader adopt a new hybrid, mentions of bleeding, mentions of Heeseung pushing reader, mentions of Heeseung punching and hitting the other hybrid. Suggestive behavior and language.
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I called him again, no response. When I first met him he was so quiet and sweet, would never hurt anyone. Why did he change? Is it my fault? was I being too strict? No.. he knew, he knew and didn’t care.
So why should I care?
I wipe my tears, I head up stairs going into my room seeing him already laying down. I lay down next to him trying to avoid any contact whatsoever, he didn’t deserve it after treating me like shit. I turn onto my side, the silence and coldness felt like daggers stabbing me deep on my chest.
I close my eyes in attempt to brush it all off, maybe if I rest and he rest tomorrow will be better?
You go back to your room, Heeseung’s is already laying down facing the wall. You crawl back to bed quietly attempting to ignore Heeseung. It feels so cold, so empty.
This isn’t my fault… I didn’t mean to make him mad. I was just worried..
You thought to yourself.
A couple of tears slip out, but who cares? You shift around until you find a comfortable position, somewhat close to Heeseung. Enough to feel his warmth.
You fall asleep after. Wasn’t the best sleep of your life for a fact, but it’s better than not resting at all. At least, it was still going to be the weekend so school wouldn’t be stressing during this situation.
10:32 a.m
You slowly wake up, your eyes burn after crying yourself to sleep last night. Heeseung is gone again. But at this point it’s not light you can do anything about it now.
You get sit up on the bed and rub your eyes tiredly. You kinda stumble getting up, as you grab onto the nightstand for support. You whine in pain as your head start hurting.
You walk downstairs, seeing that Heeseung is no where to be seen. You feel a slight pain in your chest but what is there you can do? You can either call Shuhua to ask if she has Jungwon with her or just let it go.
But then, a plan comes onto your mind. Make Heeseung jealous and treat him like he treats you. Yea it’s harsh, but that’s how he will learn.
12:06 p.m
You just got ready to head out. Head out where? Obviously, the hybrid shelter.
You make it to the hybrid shelter right when they opened. You enter and start looking around.
Should I get another hamster or maybe.. an exotic one? A fox? A black Panther? Hmm..
You look around near the exotic enclosures. But this one, this one black panther calls your attention. But the problem is, that he is known by Heeseung. The day you went looking for him, you saw this panther. This exact one. You decide to purchase the black panther. He’s shy and very introverted.
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His tail tucked between his legs as you walk him towards your car.
“ You know where Heeseung is. Don’t you?”
You ask the hybrid. He immediately starts getting nervous. Shaking his head rapidly. It was obvious he did know, I mean, how else would’ve he gotten caught and brought into this shelter?
“It’s okay, Heeseung ran away. Guess he doesn’t love me anymore, huh?” You chuckle slightly knowing this hurts you inside.
The hybrid seems to actually listen to you, hope he doesn’t turn out to be like Heeseung. Hope he is kind and won’t betray me.
“Whats your name anyways?” You glance at the panther from the driver’s seat.
“Riki.”
He says, his voice barely above a whisper but so deep.
“Okay, Riki.”
His ear softly twitch at the use of his name, he glanced over at you.
“I should let Heeseung go, right? I mean isn’t that what he wants?”
Riki shrugs. “Maybe he just.. doesn’t like being looked over.”
“I wasn’t even being strict.” You roll your eyes. “But can I tell you a plan?”
“Go ahead,” says Riki.
“Im planning on making Heeseung jealous. Maybe that way he will turn back to me.”
Riki nods and smirks
“I got you. He has always been jealous over everything that is his”
For some reason, your cheeks burn up. His? He claimed you as his?
2:12 p.m
Yo and Riki have already planned this out, Riki knew when Heeseung would come back. He could smell him near. That hamster smell made his pupils dilate.
“Is he near?” You ask.
“He’s walking down the hallway towards the door.” Riki answers.
Riki pulls you into his lap, you blush. You both pretend to be watching a movie or something. As you both hear the door open. You both look towards the door.
Heeseung stands there, clearly confused and jealous. The scene of his owner on some other random, no, not even random. His closest friend on his lap made Heeseung’s blood boil.
“Riki? What are you doing here?” Heeseung asks with a cold voice.
“I got adopted by this beautiful girl. Why? Something wrong?” Riki is playing along so well.
“She’s my owner. So she shouldn’t be on your lap.” He steps closer.
Riki is about to say something but you cut him off. “Stop arguing. It’s annoying. Heeseung just go out like you always do. Shouldn’t even bother you this much.” You glare at Heeseung. It was clear those words hurt him, his ears made it hard for him to hide his jealousy, anger, and sadness.
“I don’t care. Get off of him.” He demands.
“You don’t tell me what to do Heeseung.” You say back.
“Fuck off Heeseung.” Riki jumps in.
Heeseung looses it. He walks towards you and Riki pushing you off him roughly. He grabs Riki by his collar and punches him.
“Heeseung stop!” You yell pulling onto his arm to try and stop him from hitting Riki. That doesn’t stop him though, he pushes you away again. You fall to the ground as you keep yelling at him to stop but you slowly start passing out realizing that when Heeseung pushed you, your head hit the edge of the sharp table. The last thing you saw was Heeseung hitting Riki one last time before turning to look at you and you looking at you hand covered in blood from your head.
You half out after a seeing heeseung run towards you in a panic.
5:47 p.m
It’s been a while since you passed out. You woke up from the deep sleep touching your head and feeling something around the wound. Bandages. You look around for a bit and see Heeseung laying next to you no the bed.
“Heeseung?..” you barely whisper. He slowly opens his eyes and smiles. “You’re okay..” he says.
“Where’s Riki?” His ears slightly move down as you apparently didn’t care much about him but cared a lot for Riki.
“He’s sleeping. And you? Are you okay? I’m sorry. I lost control.” He says sadly. “It’s fine, I shouldn’t have made you jealous on purpose.” You apologize.
“It was on purpose?” He looks at you with a bit of an annoyed face. “I’m sorry I just wanted to make you feel how a felt.” You whisper.
“I know I was a brat. I just don’t like being told what to do.” He whispers in you ear as he pulls you closer.
“It’s fine, I Guess i was being too protective that I forgot you were wild.” You chuckle a bit. Heeseung smiles and kisses your cheek. “But is Riki okay?” You ask kind of concerned, “I said he is fine.” He says kind of cold. “Okay okay, calm down I was just asking. He’s still my pet after all.” You roll your eyes.
“Wait. You actually adopted him?” He frowns a bit. “Yea? What’s wrong? Isn’t he your friend?” You ask with a raised eyebrow. Why does Heeseung seem to be jealous over his friend? I mean, aren’t they close? “That little black panther. He will try and take you away from me. He has always done that. He’s such a bitch-“. “Hey!” You cut him off. “I’ll train him okay? Also don’t say bad words. Watch your language and respect.” You place a finger on-top of his lips.
With a smirk, he grabs a hold of you wrist and kisses your palm. “Either way, he won’t ever take you away. I already claimed you.” He whispers into your hand as he stares deep into your eyes.
“What do you mean?” You ask confused. “Do you not remember, darling?” He smirks, his eyes turning dark with lust. “R-remember what?..” you seem to be getting a bit nervous. “That night. The night I made you mine.”
That night.
That night, that you wanted to not be brought up again after.
“We don’t talk about that.” You look away with a flushed face. “Why? Is it because you get wet just by thinking about it? Or because you’re embarrassed that you let a hybrid claim you from inside out?” He travels his free hand down to your waist.
“Shut up.” You say kind of mad and annoyed. “Or what? You will punish me? I’ll like to see you try.” He leans closer. “Ugh you little..” you get up and out of his embrace.
He chuckles and lays back down. “Aren’t you too hurt to get up?” He smirks, why is he acting like a jerk now. “I Can do what i want.” You snap back, even if your vision was kinda blurry.
“Alright, princess.” He says putting his arms behind his head and resting. He looks so vulnerable right now.
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You make your way to the guest room looking for Riki. You spot him laying down on the bed, his eyes close and his lips slightly parted.
You sit down next to his sleeping body. He seems to react to the movement, slowly opening his eyes and looking at you with a smile.
“Well hello there.. care to tell me what happened earlier?” Riki says with a sleepy voice.
“Shouldn’t you be the one explaining?” You say.
“What did he tell you know? That I’m stealing you from him? Don’t believe him, he always says that. He’s manipulating you.” He sits up, putting his weight on his elbows.
“No.. he didn’t tell me anything.” You look down kinda alert, who is lying? Who is actually trying to save you?
“Well just know, that I’m always listening. I’m the best option you have. Heeseung has always used his first appearances to lure people. But no one knows his real identity. I mean, yeah he looks like a cute hamster. But there’s more to that little sweet hamster everyone talks about.”
Now, you’re completely lost. Your head hurts trying to figure out who is right and who is trying to trick you.
“Alright.” You say without looking at him, getting up and leaving the guest room trying to connect the dots.
While pacing around the living room, you jumbo into a tall person, Heeseung.
He smirks and looks down at you. “What’s wrong? Who got you thinking so hard now, Hm? He places his hands on your waist as he pulls you closer.
“Nothing, just school work..” you purse your lips together and nod. “If you say so, princess.” He lets go of you.
-
-
-
Riki later comes out of his room, he seems.. fine? No more bruising. “What’s going here?” He says with that deep voice.
“Talking with my owner.” Heeseung seems to squint dangerously at him, like as if he was sending a signal to Riki to stay away from you. “Your owner, huh?” Riki scoffs. “I’m pretty sure she chose me.”
Riki grabs your arm and pulls you away from Heeseung into his chest. You gasp kinda.
“The hell is your problem, Riki?” Heeseung raises his voice.
“My problem? Do you mean, your problem? Who are you to trick this beautiful human into using her.” Riki presses you harder into his chest.
“Im not tricking her. She’s mine. Let her go.” Heeseung approaches you and Riki, ready to grab you back.
“She’s not yours. She’s mine now. You may have had that connection with her and marked her, but mentally and by heart, she’s mine.” You can feel Riki’s breath and heart beat speeding up.
But what caught your attention the most was, how did he know you and Heeseung did that? “How did you..” you look up at Riki confused. “Know that Heeseung scented you inside out? Or more like breed you? He told us.” You cuts you off. This answer makes you extremely confused and embarrassed.
“Us??” You say with a low tone. “Don’t listen to him, Y/N.” Heeseung says. “Why Heeseung? You don’t want her to know how you talk about her?” Riki says in a cold tone, in like a dare me voice. “What..?” You say.
“Shut up, Riki. You don’t know anything. Now, give her back to me.” Heeseung seems to be loosing his temper again. “Riki please.. clam down.. Heeseung clam down..” you say scared. Not wanting them to fight again.
They both turn to look at you, now staring at you with concern. “It’s okay, princess” Heeseung says in a sweet tone. “Baby, look at me.” Riki demands. You look at him but then back at Heeseung. You’re completely lost.
Heeseung grabs your waist and tries pulling you back but Riki doesn’t budge you out. “Don’t call her baby. She’s mine.” Heeseung growls at Riki. Riki smirks, “I’m sure she already got used to being with me. Well, before you get here and destroyed the fun.” Riki seems to be wanting to fight. But why is he lying? Does he want Heeseung to get mad again?
“Riki what are you talking about?” You look at him with a wtf look. “What, baby? About our fun night?” Riki glares at Heeseung, he seems to be wanting Heeseung to get angrier and angrier. “What fun night?” You ask again.
Riki ignores you. But Heeseung now looks heartbroken but even angrier. “That’s it,” heeseung snaps before pulling you towards him roughly, holding you tight against him. “He’s lying isn’t he? I told you he manipulated everyone I love.” Heeseung tells you but he’s looking at Riki.
“Just admit it baby, I’m better. I Can treat you better.” Riki says.
“Im her one and only, so don’t play Riki.”
Now, who do you chose? Riki or Heeseung?
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I apologize for taking to long. I have been busy with testing and that stuff. But anyways. Who are y’all choosing? Riki or Heeseung????
41 notes · View notes
hockeyboysimagines · 2 days
Text
I’ve loved you three
Summers
Chapter 3
Warnings: language, kissing, mild sexual content, some angst and mentions of manipulative/abusive relationships.
Hello friends! Happy this is starting to catch on a bit. @cellythefloshie s chapter should be up soon! When it’s posted I’ll link it here!
Thanks!! Enjoy and let me know what you think.
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The grocery store was mostly empty at this early morning hour and Madison was thankful because she had Seth on the brain.
They’d parted ways last night with more kissing and she hadn’t seen him since then.
And she was kind of glad.
She hadn’t even begun to process what had happened the night before and was still not totally sure it wasn’t a dream. The situation with her and Seth could go one of two ways. It could either be a wonderful amazing adventure or she could run the risk of losing a lifelong friend. It really just came down whether it was worth the risk, which she already decided it was. But it wasn’t only up to her. She had no idea how he was feeling.
If she hadn’t been thinking about Seth, she would have been paying closer attention, but she didn’t even see him coming till it was too late.
“Madison?”
She turned and felt something that could only be described as dread start to settle in her stomach.
Darren was standing a few feet away, fake smile plastered on his face, the same one he wore the very first time she ever met him. She did not return it.
“Hey how are you?” He moved closer and she took a small step back. Annoyance flickered across his face.
“Fine.” She moved to walk away from him but when he followed and she turned to face him fully, arms crossed with a frown.
“Is uh-is Harper here?” He asked glancing over her shoulder.
She scoffed “No Darren. She’s not here, but I’m guessing you knew that already. Leave my sister alone.”
“How is she?”
“Did you hear what I just said? It’s none of your business. If you wanted to know that I guess you should have spent the last 6 years treating her better.” Madison’s brows were pulled low over her eyes which were blazing with anger. She wanted to punch him right in the throat and run him over with the cart.
“You don’t know anything!” He snapped loudly at her, drawing the attention of the few people nearby.
But Madison wasn’t having it and stood her ground.
“You might have been able to bully my sister but don’t think for one second you’re going to bully me.” Madison was glaring at him “Stay away from Harper. If you ever really loved her you’ll let her move on. Or if you want to tempt fate show up to the house. I dare you.” Madison smiled a little and for the first time Darren’s confidence faltered. He knew better.
“Can you tell her-“
“Fuck off.” She turned away from him, heart beating loudly in her chest. Darren didn’t scare her, but her sister potentially having to suffer for it did.
She didn’t want to tell Harper and upset her but it would also upset her if she didn’t and Harper found out later. She was glad she had elected to take the grocery store errand and that Harper didn’t or it would be a very different conversation they’d be having
Madison checked out, not even sure she'd gotten everything, and made her way home, noting Seth’s car absent from his driveway, but that Harper’s car was parked in theirs.
She made her way very slowly inside, dreading the conversation she was going to be forced to have with her, and found her at the island in the kitchen.
Harper glanced up with a big smile but it faded a little when she saw her face “You didn’t hit another car in the parking lot, did you?” she teased.
Maddie shook her head and cleared her throat “I ran into Darren while I was at the store, i was just grabbing-“ she sighed, it didn’t really matter what she was grabbing “Nevermind, when he approached me, he acted like he just happened to be there at the same time, which was fine, until he started looking around, waiting, as if you were just going to walk up to us right there in the store, and when you didn’t he got really….” Maddie trailed off “Angry. He started asking where you were, how he could contact you. If I could give you a message-“
Harper’s face was unreadable, and Maddie wasn’t sure if she was mad or sad or even maybe a little bit scared. It had upset Maddie that she’d seen him and he made a huge scene like that, but it would upset her more if this upset Harper.
Sighing, Harper ran her hand through her hair, and sat down with her sister at the island shoulders slouched “He knows where I am,” she sighed, “He’s just too scared to come here.”
They shared a smile and Maddie said, “Dad.”
“Exactly. I can be safe here-” Maddie frowned hoping that Harper wasn’t alluding to what she thought she was “Hey,” she took her sister’s arm, “He never hurt me. Not in the way you think. And he didn’t hurt you, right?”
“I would have cut his hand right off if he had touched me.” Harper laughed and hugged Maddie to her.
”You still going out with your friends?”
Maddie nodded. She had lunch planned with friends mostly as a distraction and to give her some extra thinking time before she saw Seth later on. She would be prepared by then.
“Good, you go get ready, I’ll put the groceries away. Before you go, my new number is on the fridge, and if you need me and I’m not in here, I’ll be by the pool.”
Madison stood and squeezed her hand “I’m really glad you left him Harper. He never deserved you.”
She made her way through the house and up the steps to her room to ready herself for lunch with friends.
**********
Seth was sitting on his bed with his arms crossed staring at the opposite wall. His house was completely silent, which was unusual under normal circumstances but now with Svech living there it was even more. He’d watched Madison leave early, and then leave again and had been sitting in silence since then thinking about her.
He’d done a lot of reflection over the last few hours, having not slept barely at all, and he’d come to the conclusion that he and Madison just made sense. The writing had been on the wall for years and he’d been so wrapped up in hockey that he hadn't been playing close enough attention. If he had it wouldn’t have taken him 21 summers to realize that there’d always been something there just under the surface. It couldn’t be undone now, and it almost made him laugh at how dumb he was. Things he’d forgotten about were starting to come back to him. Most of their close friends knew that their friendship was strictly a friendship. But there had been some questions about them and their relationship over the years.
“So what’s with you and Madison Alexander?”
Seth looked up and frowned at Meghan, a girl he’d been kind of hanging out with for the last week or so. She was picking at a manicured fingernail and glanced up.
“What do you mean?”
She shrugged and crossed her arms “Well you guys seem close and she’s the most popular girl in school.” She said it with some bitterness. Madison was in fact the most popular girl in school and for good reason. She was gorgeous, friendly and approachable, and Seth could tell Meghan was jealous. Madison’s popularity wasn’t anything new to him though and he never really thought about her the way others did. But Meghan was obviously insecure and he could sort of understand why.
She was popular but not Madison popular and the one times they’d crossed paths Meghan had been standoffish. Maddie seemed to not notice, but Seth did and it was starting to make sense now.
“And that’s got what to do with anything?”
Meghan shrugged “Just wondering.”
“Mads is my oldest friend. We basically grew up together.”
“And you like her?”
Seth paused and turned to her “No….? Not like that anyways-“
“Then why’d you blow me off for her last night?”
He hadn’t.
Well sort of. He was supposed to hang out with Meghan the night before but he’d spent the afternoon with Maddie and Harper next door. So when they’d insisted he come with them to get food, he had cancelled plans with Meghan and went with Maddie and Harper instead, unbeknownst to them.
He liked Meghan but she could be a lot, and hanging out with Maddie and Harper was so easy.
“I just-“
“I think your hanging out with me and hooking up with her or the other one behind my back.”
“Woah woah hang on.” He held up a hand “First of all, I’m not hooking up with Madison and if I was I wouldn’t be hanging out with you, and second of all, Harper is 23 and used to babysit us. What is your problem? Maddie’s been nothing but nice since you met her.”
“I don’t want you hanging out with her.”
Seth’s mouth fell open “Are you kidding? Your telling me who I can and can’t hang out with? We’ve been talking for like a week.”
“Okay well let me make it really easy for you then. If you wanna continue to talk, and you wanna date me, you can’t be friends with her.” She crossed her arms “Pick one.”
Serbs mouth fell open and he scoffed “Okay. Her.”
The smile slipped from her face and her mouth opened “Wh-what did you say?”
“Her.”
Meghan started yelling and pointing and calling him names, which he wasn’t surprised about, and next thing he knew he was making his way through his backyard and into Madison’s.
She smiled and waved “Hey you okay?”
He sat down on the chair next to her “Fine why?”
She raised an eyebrow and he sighed “You know that girl? Meghan that I was hanging out with?”
“Mhm.” She curled a leg underneath her and pushed a strand of hair from her forehead.
“She-I blew her off to hang out with you guys last night-“
“Seth why would-“
“And she told me that if I wanna date her I can’t be friends with you anymore.”
Maddie looked alarmed and her lips parted “Wow. That escalated uh-fast. So what did you say?”
He gave her a long look “You’ve been a great friend so it sucks that we have to stop being friends this way -“ but he couldn’t even get the words out before he started laughing.
A smile broke out across her face “You douche.”
“I’m kidding. I told her that I didn’t think it was gonna work. I’m not going to give up my friends.”
“I get it but still. That’s not fair of her to ask in my opinion and for her to think we’re hooking up is crazy.”
He chuckled and leaned back arms crossed “Not really. She thought I was hooking up with Harper too.”
“WHAT.”
A splash from next door interrupted his thoughts and he pushed himself up into a kneeling position on his bed. From his room he could see clear into both the Alexander’s back yard, Maddie’s room and part of the kitchen. It had made for one hell of a vantage point for years of hide and seek.
But what surprised him even more was that the splash from the pool was not only Harper, but Svech as well. A bold move he thought to himself with a smile and a chuckle.
Oh he was so getting in on this.
**********
It was late afternoon when Maddie returned home, now noting that all the cars, except her dads cruiser, were accounted for in both driveways, and that Seth and Andrei were both out front.
Fuck.
She hadn’t talked to him all day, assuming he too was deep in thought about what had happened the night before or he was avoiding her. She’d also been a little worried that maybe he hadn’t been thinking about her at all. Maybe it was just another kiss with another girl and things would go back to normal. Either way, she wasn't about to reach out first. She didn’t even know what to say to him.
By the time she got out of the car Andrei had all but disappeared and Seth was making his way over looking at her apprehensively and smiled “Hi.”
She felt her knees get weak and sucked in a breath “Hi.”
She shut her car door and made her way to the front meeting him in the middle. He looked nervous, and she reached forward grabbing his hand and motioned towards her house with a smile “Come on.”
Harper wasn’t in the lower half of the house, and was presumably unpacking in her basement apartment. Seth followed her up the stairs and into her bedroom, which he’d been in before but that was before he’d kissed her in the backyard.
She shut the door behind her and turned to him, brushing past him and sitting on her bed. She patted the space next to her motioning for him to sit. He felt nervous and sweaty and he had no clue what was going on with him. He never got nervous to talk to girls but kissing her last night had rattled him.
Maddie was different. But thinking back he realized she’d always been different to him.
He cleared his throat “So about last night. Should we talk about it?” His arm brushed hers and sent goosebumps across it and despite the warm weather she gave a little shiver.
Maddie looked at her legs dangling off the bed and smiled “Probably..” she had her hands resting on her knees and tentatively he reached out to hold one, resting it there a second before he spoke.
“You know I really care about you right?”
She nodded, her thumb sweeping across the skin of his hand “Yes.”
“And I would never jeopardize our friendship if I didn’t think that maybe we were more than that?…Are we more than that?”
“I think we could be. If you want that is.” She smiled at him, hair spilling over her shoulder as she turned her head to the side. If she hadn’t been holding his hand he would have thought this was a dream. She’d smiled at him more times than he could count, but never like this. It made his stomach churn, and his heart start to pound.
“More than you know. So does that mean I can kiss you again?”
She smiled and nodded, meeting him halfway fingers still intertwined with his. He kissed her very slowly and sweetly, the hand that wasn’t holding hers came up to slide up her neck and rest on her cheek.
It did not last.
Years of feelings and sexual tension began to bubble over like water on a stove. She gave him a little tug and they moved over the bed, her underneath him as he slotted himself between her legs and a hand tangled in her hair. She lost track of what she was doing and let out a breath when he ground his pelvis into hers.
“Is your dad home?” He murmured against her mouth, breath coming out in gasps.
“No.” She pulled the back of his shirt up, tugging it over his head and tossing it down on the floor. She unbuttoned the tank top she was wearing as he sprung the zipper on her shorts and pulled them down her legs, leaning forward to kiss her again as she pulled at the waistband of his shorts. Her heart was beating so loud it was drowning out the hearing in her ears but not enough that they didn’t hear the front door slam from downstairs startling them apart.
“Girls! You home?” Her dad called. She heard his footsteps start to come up the steps and Seth jumped off of her, looking around in a panic. She jumped up nearly falling over as she yanked her shorts up and threw on his shirt, shoving him inside her closet just as her dad knocked on the door. She took a deep breath and opened it.
“Oh hey dad-what uhm. What’s up?” She was breathing heavy and leaned against the door.
He was frowning at her “Are you okay?”
“Yeah why wouldn’t I be okay?” She chuckled a little.
He looked past her into her room and then down at her clothes “Who’s shirt is that?”
“Oh it’s-mine, it’s mine. I found it in my closet.” She was a terrible liar and she could see her dad didn’t believe a word she said.
He nodded slowly eyebrows raised “Right. Is your sister home?”
“I think she’s in the basement.”
“Okay are you staying in for the rest of the day?”
She glanced at the closet “Mhm.”
“Great. I’m going to go talk to Harper and then get some sleep.”
“Okay sounds good. Get some rest big guy, you deserve it. Love you.” She called leaning out the doorway with a big smile.
He chuckled “Love you too Mads.”
She closed the door casually and locked it, letting out the breath she’d been holding and creeping across the floor to open the closet. Seth was crying with laughter inside the closet, hand over his mouth as he leaned on the wall and whispered “He definitely knew I was in here. He’s gonna kill me I-“
“He’s definitely going to kill you if he hears you in here now shh!” Madison shushed him with a giggle and made her way across the room to close her curtains, and flipped her tv on, leaving them in partial darkness. She pulled Seth’s shirt over her head and handed it to him, reaching for her own shirt on the end of the bed.
He sat on her bed and shrugged it back on “This looks better on you.” He watched her with admiration as she pulled the tank top back on over her shoulders and buttoned it, pushing her hair over her shoulder.
She smiled at him and turned the volume on the tv up enough that they could talk undetected and seated herself next to him, getting as close as she possibly could. Though this was the first time she’d ever laid next to him in bed in a romantic way, it felt so natural. Like they’d been doing this since forever, almost as if it was meant to be. He ran a hand up her arm to her shoulder, turning slightly so he could lean down to kiss her again, but she pulled away, instead running her lips over his jaw, tongue sliding across his neck.
She could feel him squirming around and smiled a little.
“Stop.” He pulled her mouth off his neck, holding her face in his hands.
“Stop what?”
“You know what. If you keep doing that I’m gonna start yelling. And then you know what’ll happen.”
“My dad finding you in my room half dressed? He’d probably shoot you.”
“Your dad loves me.” he ran a hand up the side of her neck.
“Not that much.” She sucked in a breath as he leaned down to kiss her again, hand brushing up under her shirt. As his fingers moved across her waist, goosebumps bloomed across her skin and she gave a shiver. She wanted to so bad, but her sisters room was directly under hers and her dad was just down the hall.
He pulled back to look at her, brushing a strand of hair from her cheek “You know we can’t do this right?” He said quietly with a small frown “Not with an audience. And I wanna do this right.”
She nodded and sighed “I know. Where though?” She added with a chuckle.
He laughed and ran his fingers through her hair “We’re in our 20s. It’s supposed to be easier to find places to hook up, not harder.”
She chuckled and sighed “I know. But I live with Elliot Stabler and the genius who’s spiraling in the basement and these walls are paper thin. How do you think Harper knows about all the bad shit we did growing up.”
He laughed and ran a finger across her collarbone “True. My house is out of the question too, between my parents and Svechy. Hey we-“
“Absolutely not.” She said putting a hand up.
“You don’t even-“
“The Tiguan is out of the question Seth.”
His mouth fell open and he deflated a little “Okay okay. Just a suggestion sheesh….but out of curiosity why not? Is there something wrong with my Tiguan?”
“That thing is one hopped curb short of being held together by duct tape. Too much movement and it’s falling apart.”
“You have a lot of confidence in my abilities.”
She rolled her eyes and gave the skin on his waist a squeeze “Guess that means you’ll have to really wow me.”
“Oh I’ll wow you.” He said leaning down to kiss her.
Hours later, she’d managed to sneak Seth out undetected and sent him back to his house with another quick kiss and a wave and she was now lying across her bed fighting the urge to kick and squeal because her dad was still asleep down the hall.
She felt her phone buzz and picked it up to see a message from Seth.
What are the odds you can sneak out later?
She smiled and glanced up through the curtains at his window Not so great. That’s the trouble living with a trained investigator.
Damn. Guess I’ll just have to visualize. So what’re you wearing?
Madison giggled and put a hand over her mouth eyes swiveling to the ceiling An oversized shirt and socks.
That’s it? Nothing else?
Like what?
Nothing underneath?
Maddie grinned evily Why would there be? I don’t wear underwear
Across the yard, in Seth’s room a phone slipped from his hand and fell to the floor. He let his head fall back and huffed.
She was killing him.
He’d kissed her on two occasions and she had him wrapped, but before he could have any more thoughts about Madison, or her underwear or anything, Svech burst through the door to his bedroom startling him.
“Do they not practice KNOCKING in Russia Jesus Christ.” He said grabbing the spot over his heart.
“What are you smiling about? And where you been all afternoon?” Andrei asked him sitting at the end of his bed.
“None of your business nosey. How goes the plan to get Harper to acknowledge your existence? Or are you still invisible?”
“Ha ha.” He said squinting at him “We’re not talking about me.”
Seth laughed and shrugged “I’m just having a good day is all.”
“And does that good day have a name? Madison maybe?”
Seth kicked at him “Never you mind about my good day. What’s the next step in your master scheme? You’ve tried stalking, complimenting-“
“I did not stalk her-“
“You.” Seth said sitting up pointing at him “Showed up at her job to go running when she didn’t want you there. I don’t know what they call that in Russia but here that’s stalking my guy.”
“And you.” Andre said pointing at him “Went with me so that makes you an accomplice. And I did it at the suggestion of your good day.”
“My good day never explicitly told you-“
“Aha! So she is your good day.” Andrei said slapping him on the shin and grinning.
Seth sputtered at him for a second before he broke out into a smile “Fuck off.”
“Joking, I’m joking. Is that what Harper meant by “Being good to my sister? Or whatever she said.”
“I think so. Maddie must have said something, I don’t know. Harper knows everything about everyone so maybe she just guessed. She’s smart.” He tapped his temple and Andrei rolled his eyes.
“So tell me.”
“Tell you what?”
“Don’t be an idiot okay?”
Seth was laughing and shrugged “It’s been nice. We gotta get you your own Alexander sister buddy.” He slapped him on the back and stood “Come on, can we go eat I’m starving. We can hatch a plan to make Harper fall in love with you before the summers over.”
Andrei watched as Seth stood and cleared his throat “So you think she might like me a little bit? Maybe?”
Seth grinned “ She will if I have anything to do with it.”
**************
Maddie made her way through the house looking for Harper. She couldn’t talk with her dad about it, and her friends had been too wrapped up with their stuff to pay Maddie and her summer dramas any mind. In fact it had been over a week since she’d even seen or spoken to them. While Harper gave great advice, she was also uniquely qualified to speak about her and Seth because she’d basically raised both of them. Harper wouldn’t steer her wrong.
But really Maddie just wanted to talk. As a teen, before Harper moved out, they’d spent many nights talking and giggling together until their dad finally had to enforce curfew because they were keeping him up at night.
But as Maddie opened the basement door to descend the steps, she heard Harper crying. She paused and stood at the top of the stairs for second before she backed up and shut the door quietly. She wouldn’t bother Harper with this. As she made her way through the kitchen she spotted Seth and Andrei making their way though the driveway to Seth’s car talking and laughing. Seth spotted her through the large kitchen window and smiled and waved at her, which she returned before she made to turn and ran smack into her dad.
“Jesus dad I-“
“You going out with them?” He nodded to the Jarvis’s driveway.
“Me? No im going to sketch a while. Why would I be going out with them?”
“Did you or did you not go golfing with them yesterday?”
She chuckled “How did-Yeah but what’s that have to do with anything?”
He crossed his arms and peered down at her “And which one was in your room when I came home?”
Maddie wanted to shrivel up and die right there on the hallway rug as she looked up at her dad. Though historically he wasn’t a yeller, she and Harper had never really tested his patience. Maddie had always been more trouble prone than her sister but having a boy into her bedroom closet was a new one. They’d always followed the house rules, and their dad was laid back for the most part.
But he didn’t seem angry. He stood staring at her eyebrows raised “Hmm?”
Maddie felt her face get red and cleared her throat, straightening up and looking her dad in the eye “Seth.”
Surprise registered across his face and his mouth opened “Really?”
She hoped that because her dad loved Seth and had watched him grow up that he wouldn’t be as upset about it if it had been Andrei, a guy who had just shown up a week ago. She cleared her throat, crossing her fingers behind her back and smiled hopefully at her dad “So how much trouble am I in?”
He shrugged “Why would you be in trouble?”
“Because I lied. I had a boy in my bedroom….i lied? Really nothing?”
He frowned but looked amused “Do you want to be in trouble?”
She shook her head “No.”
“Okay then. But don’t do it again.” He warned pointing a finger at her.
“Yessir.” She said with a salute and a stifled giggle as she moved past her dad and up the steps pulling out her phone to text Seth with a small smile.
M: My dad knows you were in my closet. He said he’s looking for you.
S: WHAT.
27 notes · View notes
wonuwrites · 6 hours
Text
ot13 Seventeen's Espresso Song Reaction
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Anyone else also OBSESSED with Sabrina Carpenter's "Espresso?" Literally so cunty and song of the summer <3 I thought this would be fun to write because I've been writing a lot of angst lately. I hope you enjoy. xo - @wonuwrites
Warning: Some are more suggestive than others: Wonwoo, Dino, Joshua, Woozi, and Mingyu's got pretty sexual especially so MDNI xo, Cursing as usually bc that's the person I am lmao.
A/N: Just like my 'We Can't Be Friends' reactions, I will be writing the scenarios x members from when lyrics come in. Hope that makes sense :)
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♡ DK: "Now he's thinkin' 'bout me, every night oh, Is it that sweet? I guess so."
Seokmin in general is so boyfriend coded but not even he predicted how down bad he got because of you. You never left his mind especially after your first kiss. You were his first and last thought every day. He vowed that he would do everything in his power to not fuck up anything with you. One evening while you were getting ready for bed your phone lit up and you saw your lovely boyfriends face. You couldn't help but giggle before picking up. "Hello Jagi~" "Hello Beautiful, I was just thinking about you." "Right before bed? That's so dirty, Seokminnie." This made him get flustered because he was trying to be cute but now he was horny and ahhhhh. You both then continued to try to out flirt the other which ended up having both of you giggly and blushed messes.
♡ Wonwoo: "Move it up, down, left, right, oh. Switch it up like like Nintendo."
Normally gaming sessions with Wonwoo would be fairly PG however tonight it got a bit more intense. There was something about the way his fingers were fingering his xbox controller's joystick you so aroused. You tried to hide how turned on you were getting but Wonwoo knew you all too well which is why he decided to tease you a little bit. He bit his lip and would groan when the game got a little "too difficult" and you swore you were about to come undone based off his fingers, his groans, his face, him, everything. After a bit it started to get a bit too much so you scooted closer to him and snuggled into him before giving a kiss to the base of his neck. He would chuckle before looking down at you. "Yes?" "Mmm, You know I love gaming with you but I kinda wanna play with a different kind of joystick now." "Say less," he would say before throwing the xbox controller to the side and pulling you into a kiss. It was going to be a fun night.
♡ Hoshi: "And I got this one boy, and he won't stop calling. When they act this way, I know I got them."
Your phone buzzed for what seemed like the fifth time that day but you couldn't help but smirk. Soonyoung and you had recently started talking about a week prior and last night you both had your first kiss and suddenly he just craved your lips and you. Some might find the clinginess to be a bit cringey but truth be told, you were ALSO craving him. The way his lips tasted last night was enough to get you love drunk and obsessed. When he admitted to you that he couldn't help but think about the kiss you both shared you wanted to do a little dance because you knew he felt the same way. "Hello?" You said after answering the phone. You could hear him smile as he said his greeting as well. "(Y/N), I know I just called a while ago but I was just wondering if you wanted to, I don't know hang out tonight after practice?" This made you giggle before agreeing to hang out. After you both hung up he did a cheesy ass fist pump which gave Minghao and Seungkwan second hand embarrassment. They were happy for their friend but oh my god.
♡ Dino: "Too bad your ex don't do it for ya."
Chan was not someone to compare people. Especially when it came to his relationships. However, when he noticed that you would do certain things his ex wouldn't do he would become speechless. Like for instance, when he had a horrible day and you offered to help him relax by giving him a massage or hell a blowjob he would stare at you as if you just told him you stole Saturn for him. His ex would usually just say "that sucks, Channie" but you were offering to do things for him? Oh my god. When he saw you start putting your hair into a makeshift ponytail while getting on your knees he swore he fell in love all over again. He would lean down and kiss your lips before letting you undo his jeans and let Chan Jr come out to play. (lmfaooo i'm so sorry)
♡ Minghao: "Walked in and dream came trued it for ya."
When Minghao would think about his future, he always wanted someone to be understanding, loving, and caring. When you came along you matched all those things and he was absolutely shocked. You were his dream come true and on nights like these where you were both sat at your favorite cafe in the corner he couldn't help but be so thankful that his He would kiss your knuckles and just stare at you with such love in his eyes. You would blush at his loving glare and he would be like "why why why?" He would just tease you a bit which would make you even more flustered. This would make him smile and giggle which would cause you to giggle as well. After leaving the cafe, he would have your hand in his and would casually be swinging it as you both were talking about random topics. When you got to the car, he pulled you in and pressed a kiss to your lips before whispering a "thank you" to you.
♡ Joshua: "Soft skin and I perfumed it for ya."
You just had gotten out of the shower and you had a million and three butterflies storming your stomach. You and Jisoo had made plans to have a sleepover after a long time and you didn't want to mess anything up. You decided to spray his favorite perfume of your on you with matching lotion. As you were finishing up getting ready you heard your front door open. "Baby, I'm home." you heard your handsome as hell boyfriend call out. This made you smile wide as you made your way out of the bathroom and saw he had a bouquet of flowers for you. Just that gesture made you want to jump his bones. He smiled at you and came over and gave you a hug and a kiss. He groaned in the kiss as he could smell how good you smelled. He looked down at you and it gave you butterflies. "You feel so soft." He whispered which made you feel giggle. "Thanks, I was in the middle of lotioning up." "oh?" "yeah, I couldn't reach one place though, can you help me?" He smirked as he led you to your room which made both of you break out into giggles.
(I had writers block for Joshua's :'(, I will rewrite it one day. ~)
♡ Vernon: "I know I Mountain Dew it for ya."
It was one of those days where both Hansol and you were trying to annoy the other but in a sexy way. Today's weapon? Really awful puns or pick up lines. The rules were easy, 1. You couldn't laugh at what the other person said, however you could laugh at your own pun. 2. You can't reuse the same pun. 3. You had 30 seconds to make the pun 3. You laugh, cringe, or take too long you strip an item of clothing. You both thought this was fun and would make a competition out of it. Today you were both not doing too well and were both down to your underwear. You both were a bit turned on but neither of you wanted to fold or lose that quickly. It was your turn and you honestly were struggling to think of anything. You had about 10 seconds left when you noticed an empty Mountain Dew bottle on the dresser. You giggled before pointing at it and shouting, "Just call me a soda pop because I really want to mountain dew it for ya." This made Hansol snort and cover his face. You put both your arms in the air to cheer your victory as Hansol took off his briefs and showed his member. "Well soda pop, I think it's time to mountain dew it." He didn't have to tell you twice.
♡ Seungkwan: "That morning coffee I brewed it for ya."
Acts of service was one of your main love languages. When Seungkwan stayed over one night, you decided to wake up a little earlier and made him an Iced Americano. You decided to brew a medium espresso and asked your Alexa to play Sabrina's new song "Espresso." You were so caught up in the song you didn't even notice him staring at you dancing and singing along to the song. He stared at you with admiration as you danced to your own choreography that was sliiiiightly off beat but he'd never tell you that. He loved how in your element you were. When you turned around while spinning you almost died of embarrassment which made him put a hand to his mouth to try to stop his laugh. "You are precious," he would whisper as you continued to die on the floor lmaooo.
♡ Woozi: "One touch and I brand newed it for ya."
Jihoon is very particular with who he is touchy with. Physical touch is not one of his favorite things in the world. However, that partially changed once you entered his life. Each touch whether sexual or casual made him feel like he was on fire and was just pure ecstacy when he was with you. One night, he was a bit more touchy than normal which made you raise an eyebrow. Normally it was you who would initiate any type of physical touch but this time it was a happy surprise. You kissed his nose while giggling before questioning if he wanted anything. The question made him blush and hide into the crook of your neck before admitting, "Can you touch me back? I need your hands." You smirked before wrapping your arms around him. "where do you need me, baby?" "Anywhere, I'm all yours."
♡ Jeonghan: "Say you can't sleep, baby I know, That's that me espresso."
Anyone who knows Jeonghan knows this man loves sleep. If he could he would sleep forever. Sleep is just so nice and he loves it so fucking much. That's why he along with everyone was shocked when you came along and he was a lot more alert and was just so addicted to you. He would playfully deny being as whipped when you were not around but when you were around and people would tease him he would just giggle nervously which would make you blush. Never in a thousand years would you think that you, (Y/F/N), would have this kind of effect on a man. Especially a man like Jeonghan. One night he was at your front door kissing you after a successful date. He kept smiling into the kisses which made you giggle. "I could do this forever," he would whisper which would make you giggle even more. "We need to go to sleep, baby," you would try before he kissed you again which would make both of you giggle. "I can't sleep when your lips taste this good though," he would tease before kissing you again. You pulled away before teasingly quoting Sabrina by saying "that's that me espresso." He would just laugh before pulling you back in again before saying, "you have no idea."
♡ Jun: "Oh, he looks so cute wrapped around my finger."
The way you had Jun wrapped around your finger made his own members assume you did witchcraft. You were both so whipped for each other but he was a bit more obvious about it. If you needed a drink, he would be like "say less," and get up and get you your beverage of choice. If any of his members teased him, he'd just be like "I don't see you dating anyone," which would make everyone crack up and Jeonghan applauding him. You honestly loved the fact he loved you how he did. You found him so cute. When you told him that he would just giggle and blush which would make you fall for him even harder. It made you want to prove to him that the feelings he felt for you were also mutual. Which trust me, he knew. <3
♡ S. Coups: "My twisted humor make him laugh so often."
Due to the taboo that unfortunately plagues South Korea still with idols dating, you and Seungcheol had to play it cool if you were ever on variety shows together. Normally it was okay, however today everything you did just made him laugh and vise versa. To onlookers, it looked like you both were mutual friends because of the idol world but to both of your groups, they were worried that one of you would fuck up and belly flop into a scandal. When one of the MC's jokingly made a comment about Seungcheol acting whipped toward you, you would quip, "it won't last long. Don't worry." which would make everyone around you laugh. Seungcheol knew you were attempting to be self deprecating but regardless, off this variety show he was going to prove how long he was planning on staying.
♡ Mingyu: "My honey bee, come and get this pollen."
It only took one look for Mingyu to know what you wanted. He would be sitting at the table on a facetime call with one of the members and you would walk out into the hallway and stare at him. He would look up and smile at you before realizing you were wearing a fairly skimpy robe and raising an eyebrow. You would wink before walking back into your shared room. You would hear him curse before saying goodbye to whoever and literally run down the hall to the room. He'd practically tackle you because he was so excited to make love to his baby.
PS this took so long for me to write bc I kept dancing in my chair to the song instead of writing. I'm sorry to my besties who been waiting LOL I will edit tomorrow when I feel better about myself <3
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allmyocsarebritish · 2 days
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Kiss, maime, kill: Chapter 3 - My soul is yours
Pairing: Alastor X killer! Fem reader
Warnings!!!: Reader and Alastor are serial killers, Reader actually becomes self aware for once in this chapter, drug mentions, angst and fluff, love confessions, the warning list is getting quite long
Word count: 1k
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1930
Louisiana, New Orleans
The sound of twigs snapping beneath your feet as you sprinted echoed through the empty woods. Alastor ran a few paces ahead, prompting you to push on, in order to match his stride. Uncontrollable laughter slowed you both down, as did the rather heavy knife he was carrying. Thankfully, it had been two years since you had ditched the shovel for the majority of your killings.
Any ordinary person would assume that the two of you were trying to get caught, the thrill of the chase. And, whilst that added additional excitement to you, it wasn't the main reason for your carelessness. Yes, you wanted your bodies to be found, but not for you to be exposed as the murderer. No, your main motive was to be feared.
The charismatic radio host and his dearest friend could surely never be suspect to such a vile crime. The town was shaken to it's roots by fear of the Louisiana Butcher, never knowing what kind of sick bastard was lurking in the woods at night. The utter dismay every time another person was added to the list of those who had gone missing in the past 3 years was entertainment for you and Alastor. It was so captivating.
Your thoughts raced as you caught up to Al, trying to keep some form of lid on your laughter. But the smiles present on both of your faces was enough to portray the pleasure this brought you.
"I really hope there's no brutal killers in these woods." You giggled, twirling the knife around your fingers.
"I suppose you had better start running now then, Cher." Al smiled, a dangerous glint sparking in his eye.
"Oh no, whatever will I do?" You stared at him with huge doe eyes, faking a fearful expression before taking off, dodging between trees. Alastor was hot on your tail, barely allowing you a moment's head start before giving chase. The hunt was exhilarating, and you felt a familiar excitement take control of you. Adrenaline was one hell of a drug, and your addiction was becoming more and more lethal each passing second.
Unfortunately, your game was cut short by a raised tree root tripping you as you dared to throw a fleeting glance over your shoulder at your pursuer. You landed very ungracefully on your ass with a thud, somehow managing, in your infinite clumsiness, to bring Alastor down with you.
Your face flushed as you realised the position you were both in. Alastor was all but on top of you, his hands supporting himself either side of your head. His rather long fringe (bangs) flopped over his forehead, and his glasses had begun to slide down his perfect nose. You reached out a hand and pushed them back up, his face softening into a gentler smile.
"Got you." He smirked.
"Guess I should stick to being the hunter, huh?" Overwhelmed with embarrassment and flustered beyond belief, you tried to cover your face with your arm, but Alastor pulled it away.
"Don't be so sure about that, my dear. I'm quite addicted to the feeling of the chase."
"And the attack?" You questioned, confidence and excitement rising.
"Just sublime." Alastor leaned in gradually, giving you plenty of time to escape. After all, he may have been a serial killer but he was still a gentleman, letting you establish your comfort zone.
You met him in the middle, all of the adrenaline, thrill chasing and emotions rising to the front of your mind.This. This was your new addiction. Passion. Danger. Sadism. Pleasure. All blended into that first kiss.
"Your presence has impacted me so much my dear, that, even when I'm not alone, i feel something is missing should you not be by my side" he pulled back slightly, voice low and quiet despite the solitude offered by the oh-so-feared woods.
"Where they see a merciless killer in your eyes, I see my future." You responded, relishing in the moment. Being overwhelmed by emotions was nothing new to you of course, but this feeling was foreign. You liked it. Craved it. "I hope you stay with me forever."
"Of course, Cher." He rolled off you, so that the two of you were lying on your backs, side by side, and staring up at the onyx sky. The stars reflected the lights of heaven above, a stark juxtaposition to the sins and atrocities you committed beneath. Brightness in the dark, like Alastor's presence in your life.
You turned your head, facing Al and taking in the moment. He looked serene, gazing at the night sky, and strangely normal. Perhaps in another life he was, just a charming radio host, nothing more nothing less. In that life would you still be at his side? Would you still have met? Surely if fate desired, but why should you receive suck a blessing after all the suffering you caused?
What the fuck? Never in your whole career had you given a second thought to ending someone's life. But reflecting, your morals had gone more than wayward. Though regardless if how remorseful you felt, it didn't change a thing. The past was the past, and addiction had already sank its claws into your unsuspecting flesh.
"Al?" You began tentatively, worried he'd grow distant if you were turning soft.
He hummed in acknowledgement, small smile still playing in his lips as he continued to gaze towards heaven. A paradise you would never see.
"I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you." Your voice began to waver. This was not a good rush of emotion.
"Look who's becoming self aware." Alastor turned on his side, now laying facing you. He gently caressed the side of your face, hand pausing over your cheek. "Tell me every terrible thing you ever did, and let me love you anyway. I want to love you without you having to hide the parts of you that you deem unlovable."
Your gaze met his, and you felt a high overtake you once more. "I adore you, Al. With my whole heart. And I'm sorry I created.. complexities."
"And I do not care how complicated this gets. I still want you. I always will, Cher."
He opened his arm to you, and you slotted underneath, basking in his warm embrace.
"I love with my soul instead of my heart or mind, in case my mind forgets or my heart stops. But my soul will forever be yours, Mon cœur."
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Gross
Fic Idea (no pressure obviously) Thomas struggling with his self image and ego, and in response Roman ends shapeshifting all the time, fluctuating between the masculine beauty standard (lean, muscular, hairless) and what society considers “ugly” (pudgy, hairy). And based on how he looks, Roman will interact with the others or hide away – anon
hihi!! had this random idea for a sanders sides fic- something along the lines of- a while after Remus and Roman split, Remus comes back (when the dark sides start to get more involved) and confesses that he hoped Roman was doing better after he joined the light sides? that all he wanted was for his brother to be happy, away from the darkness for once? angst sadness ykyk :)) – can-you-hear-me-axhilles
hi, so I just read your wings series and I was wondering if we could have something with Remus and his tentacles? Like maybe him thinking they are ugly or something, I’m not really sure. Maybe Roman has animal characteristics too and they’re “prettier” or “better” so he gets insecure? Mainly focused on these two but I don’t mind if it’s all of them together. No pressure to write this tho! – anon
I’ve been reading your Sanders Sides stuff for the longest time and I was wondering if I could get some Roman angst with a side of creativitwins? – meandmacats
Read on Ao3
Warnings: non-consensual body modification, self-esteem issues, self-hatred
Pairings: gen
Word Count: 5481
Or, five times Remus helped Roman out when Thomas's self-esteem issues change his nature, and one time Roman helps Remus.
 
”Remus?”
Remus looks up from his knitting to see Patton standing over him. “What’s good, Pat-Pat?”
“I’m, what’re you doing?”
“Oh, I’m knitting this patchwork sweater out of hair.”
“Oh…how cool.” Patton gives himself a shake. “Anyway, I was wondering if you’ve seen Roman? He was supposed to come down for lunch but he never showed.”
“Like, at all, at all?”
“Yeah. Neither hair nor hide! Or—well, I guess he did do the hide since he’s hiding from us, and you’re the hair!”
“Ah, Pat-Pat, never stop with the dad jokes. You’ll make all of us go into pun-withdrawal.” Remus carefully sets aside the needles and bounces to his feet. “I’ll go look for him, see if he needs to be pried out of the dragon’s gullet again.”
“Oh, thanks so much, Remus, I really—wait, ‘again?’”
“Gotta blast!”
Honestly, it’s not like Roro is known for missing deadlines, that’s Remus’s thing. Especially when it comes to things like meals and remembering to eat—well, Ro’s not exactly the pinnacle of healthy practices when he get absorbed in his work, but he’s better at it than some people give him credit for. Which means he’s either deep in the middle of something he’s keeping to himself, he’s asleep because the time zones in the Imagination are all kinds of wackadoo, or he really does need to be rescued.
Which isn’t Remus’s thing, come on, Ro, you’re ruining his reputation.
By the time he gets to the Imagination, he’s already pulling out his acid-proof gloves and sharpening his Morningstar. He stops dead, however, when he sees the doors are still locked from last night. That’s weird. Maybe Ro just used his personal gate instead of the main one? But that just takes him right to his little workshop area, that’s not anywhere near where the dragons are…
He’s about to go for his gateway when he hears a quiet noise coming from Roman’s door. Frowning, he turns. Roman’s door is only a few feet away. He glances up and down the hall to make sure none of the resident sneaks are nearby—Janus and Virgil—and knocks on the door.
“Uh, busy!”
“Ro, it’s me.”
“Oh. Did you, um, did you need something?”
“You weren’t at lunch. Pat-Pat’s getting worried.”
He hears a muffled curse and the door glimmers slightly. That’s Roman’s cue that he can sink in. He stows the acid gloves and the Morningstar and sinks in, expecting Roman at his desk or on the floor puzzling over some bit of a story he can’t quite get right, but instead he sees an empty room.
“Where are you?”
“Bathroom.”
Remus pops his head through the door and blinks. “Whoa.”
”Yeah, yeah,” Roman mumbles, already reaching for the bandages curled up on the counter, “you don’t have to say it.”
”That looks—“
“I said you don’t have to say it.”
Remus slams his mouth shut, but he can’t stop staring at the acne. Throbbing red pimples that look like they’re causing Roman pain every time he so much as breathes, bigger whiteheads that have already started to ooze, blackheads that litter every inch of skin that isn’t already covered, some of which look like they’re almost on top of each other…
Roman turns his back on him and hunches his shoulders. “What do you want, Re?”
“I, uh…well, now I want to help.”
Roman laughs. It’s not funny. “There isn’t any helping this. Not until Thomas feels better.”
“Whoa. Back up. What?”
“This.” He waves a hand at his face. “This is a thing, remember?”
“Oh. Oh, right, fuck.”
“Yeah.”
Remus scrubs a hand over his face. “Can I help make it less painful while it’s going on?”
There’s a pause. Then Roman’s head turns slightly. “Would you?”
“Shit, yeah,. Roro. You’ve helped me with stuff more times than I can count on my fingers and toes, let me help you.” He gets a small huff that might be an actual that-was-kind-of-funny-I’m-feeling-better laugh. “Yeah?”
“…yeah, okay.”
“Wonder-bats! Okay, I think I still have that stuff from when we had those sores from the poison experiments…where did I put that?”
“Did you leave it in your room or my room?”
”We cleaned up here, so it should be…aha!” He takes a big plastic case from under the sink. “Go sit your perky butt on the edge of the tub, I’ll be right there.”
“…thanks, Remus.”
“What’re brothers for?”
2.
The very first time it had happened, it had been well before Thomas had learned what it was to be attractive.
Remus had found Roman crying in his room, curled up under all the blankets he could find with tissues covering the floor.
“Ro-bro? What happened? Do I need to fight someone for you?”
“It won’t come off!”
“What won’t come off?”
Roman had peered out from under the blanket cocoon and Remus’s mouth had dropped open when he saw the words FREAK and LOSER written all across Roman’s face in permanent marker.
“Who did that? Was it Virgil? I’ll fight him!”
“No,” Roman had sniffled, “it wasn’t—wasn’t Virgil. It wasn’t any of them.”
“Did you do it? That’s more my kinda thing, isn’t it?”
“No!” Roman had wailed. “I didn’t do it! Someone—someone hurt Thomas!”
“Someone hurt Thomas? But nothing happened! We didn’t get into any fights!”
“Not like that! They were just mean. They were really mean and they said he looked ugly and they called him a f-freak and a loser and—and—“
Remus had scurried forward and wrapped his brother in a hug as he broke down in tears. “You’re not a freak or a loser, Roro. Neither is Thomas. They were wrong, you know that, right?”
”Then why won’t it come off?”
Sure enough, up close, Remus had seen the red and raw skin where Roman had scrubbed it with whatever he could find to make the words go away. Bits were even coming off on the blanket as Roman rubbed his cheek against it.
”Hey, hey, stop that. You’re hurting yourself.”
“I don’t care.”
“I care! I don’t like seeing my brother hurt!” Remus had given him a shake. “You don’t have to hurt yourself more on top of this, okay? Come on, come into the bathroom, I’ll help you.”
“Y-you will?”
“Yeah, Roro, come on.”
The twins had gone to the bathroom where towels and washcloths were still strewn around from Roman’s previous attempts. Remus had made Roman sit on the stool and reached for the soap, getting one of the washcloth more suds than cloth and trying to wipe off the words.
“That tastes so bad.”
“So keep your mouth shut.”
“But you keep wiping it over my mouth!”
“No, I’m wiping it over your cheek, which is next to your mouth. And you talking isn’t making it any better, so shush.”
Roman had grumbled silently until Remus accidentally went too roughly over one of the sore spots and Roman yelped.
“Ow!”
“Sorry, I’m sorry,. I didn’t mean to.”
“Wash it off! Wash it off!”
“Okay, okay! Come here!”
They had stumbled over to the sink and Remus practically shoved Roman’s head under the tap. He had spluttered and flailed out, splashing Remus.
”Hey! Don’t splash me!”
“I’ll splash you all I want!”
“No, you won’t!”
“Yeah, I will!”
It had…devolved from there.
The bathroom had been sopping wet by the end of it, not a towel nor tile had been spared from the twin’s water war. Their clothes were just as soaked, their hair dripping like they’d just walked through a hurricane. The sink and the bathtub still ran as if nothing were wrong and the detachable shower head in Remus’s hand sprayed as merrily as ever.
”Whoa, hey!”
“What?”
“It’s gone!”
Roman had run to the mirror, touching his face. Sure enough, the words had vanished.
”It is gone!”
”You’re welcome,” and he had taken a big bow with the shower head still spraying everywhere, “I think that means I win.”
“Whoa, wait, no, it doesn’t.”
“Yes, it does.”
”No!”
“Yes!”
It took a while longer for the war to end and even longer for the bathroom to dry.
3.
Someone says Thomas eats too much junk food and Roman can’t stop dripping oil.
Remus finds him sitting on his bathroom floor, the drain in the shower covered with a towel. He’s sitting on towels too, towels soaked and heavy with oil as Roman’s tears fight to get out from his eyes and through the slick covering his skin.
“The others are worried,” he says quietly, lingering in the doorway, “they want to know what’s wrong.”
Roman doesn’t say anything. Remus peers a little closer and sees the telltale sheen over his mouth too. Even just thinking about how it must feel to have that much oil on his lips makes Remus shudder. He summons a washcloth from his own stash and a bottle of soap.
“Just like old times,” he says as he crouches down in front of him, “I’m gonna wash off the oil on your face, okay?”
Roman manages a small nod and Remus gets to work. Normally when he’s washing oil off stuff, he scrubs at it like he’s trying to grind it with sandpaper and the soap foams up around his wrist. But this is Roman, not some metal piece of equipment, so he goes as gently as he can without suffocating him with soap or making no progress at all. He has to stop a few times when Roman lets out a pained noise or winces at the rasp of the cloth, just holding a blotting sheet there to soak up the oil as best he can while he waits for him to settle. He makes a note to work on the heavy duty blotters in case something like this ever happens again.
At last, when Roman looks like he’s about to cry for a very different reason, the space around his lips and nose is clear enough for him to gasp out a few words.
“Sorry, thank you, sorry—“
”Shh-shh, Roro, you don’t need to apologize. Just tell me what you need.”
”’S so gross.”
“I know, I know. I’m sorry. I’m right here.”
Roman lets out a frustrated whine and Remus quickly pulls out his phone.
“If you tell me what Thomas needs to stop thinking about I can get Lolo on it.”
“No, then he’ll—“
“I’m not gonna tell him what’s wrong with you, okay? I’m just gonna prod them into getting Thomathy’s brain on the right track away from whatever-the-fuck-this-is-station.”
More oil starts to build up and he shoves his phone in his pocket, working on washing it away again. His presence seems to have calmed Roman down a bit; the oil comes in smaller waves this time, concentrated more around the naturally oily parts of his face rather than every inch of his skin. When he’s cleaned off the areas around his nose and mouth, he goes and starts moving to the rest of his head.
“Junk food,” Roman mumbles, as if saying it too loud would make the oil return with a vengeance, “saying bad stuff ‘bout Thomas…unhealthy…gross…”
Remus whips out his phone and sends a text to Logan about food not having a moral weight and how eating something was always better than eating nothing. He gets a text back a few seconds later that just says on it.
“Lolo cavalry is assembled, he’s going.” He tucks the phone away and keeps washing Roman off. “And I’m gonna stay right here until we get all this oil off you, okay? We can even do your thirteen-step skin care routine once it’s gone.”
“It’s not thirteen steps.”
“Whatever you wanna tell me, Roro, at least you’re not as bad as Snakey.”
It’s the first time Roman manages to laugh that day, and Remus makes sure it isn’t the last.
4.
When Patton and Logan have near simultaneous nervous breakdowns after someone calls Thomas lazy, Remus makes sure Virgil’s wrapped around the Mindscape’s padre and Janus has Logan in his little snake den before he goes off in search of Roman.
The Imagination door is covered in cobwebs that retreat as he approaches, a few spiders waving hello as they disappear. He runs his hand over the keyhole, checking to see if it’s just an affectation, or if Roman really hasn’t been using it. He knows he has, is the thing; Roman’s had more projects on the go this month than he’s ever had before and if it weren’t for Janus and Logan dragging him out of it to make sure he didn’t completely lose touch with the Mindscape, he bets his left barnacle that Roman would’ve been living there too just so he wouldn’t miss an opportunity to keep working. And sure enough, the keyhole glows red as soon as his fingers brush it and he carefully pushes the door open.
He walks into the most statistically average middle class sitcom home he’s ever seen. Needless to say, he hates it.
”Ro? Are you here?”
There’s a faint noise coming from what he guesses is the direction of the living room and listen, as little time as he has to spend in this painfully mediocre place, the better. Seriously, he can feel the whispers of white picket fences and PTA meetings lingering ominously over his shoulder with every second he walks through these beige walls. Snatches of TV dialogue becomes audible as he makes his way through the house.
He comes to a stop.
He tilts his head.
There’s certainly a person in the living room, but it doesn’t really look like Roman. They look like every Sunday cartoon about a husband and wife where it’s terribly misogynistic and heteronormative, recliner out, bag of chips in lap, staring vacantly at the TV. It’s only the fact that they’re crying at the paid advertising programs and that Remus would recognize his brother anywhere that he knows it’s Roman.
He sits down on the plastic covered couch and tries not to look at the soulless photos of smiling families perched on the dusty mantle. Roman doesn’t look away from the screen but the hand nearest Remus twitches slightly.
“Hey,” he calls, and Roman’s head turns a little, “hey, Roro. I’m here. It’s gonna be okay. You’re gonna be okay.”
The TV blares something about a crockpot that cooks fancier meals than a normal crock pot.
“I know how shitty it is when people accuse you of being lazy. Especially when they’re just complaining that they haven’t seen anything from you.” He shuffles and the couch squeaks. “And we all know how hard you’re working. How hard Thomas is working.”
Roman’s eyes flick to his. Remus smiles and takes his hand, giving it an encouraging squeeze.
“Giving yourself a break isn’t being lazy. Having a hard time doing things isn’t lazy. Not being able to work on something because it’s just covered in the fucking ooze isn’t being lazy. You aren’t being lazy, okay? You wouldn’t even be lazy if you decided you didn’t want to work on any projects for the next year.”
The TV glitches out. Static fills the room and it actually feels like Remus can breathe. He squeezes Roman’s hand again and shifts closer. Roman stares at him with wide eyes.
”I mean it, Roro. You’re not—I know we’ve gone over this and I’ll keep giving you crowbars for as long as you need them—“
The smallest smile appears on Roman’s face.
“—but you’re not—your worth isn’t in what products or content you can make. You know i love you because you’re my brother, because you’re funny and clever and ridiculous and there’s no one I’d rather make stuff with. You could decide that you don’t want anything to do with Thomas’s career anymore—“
Roman makes a devastated noise.
“Calm down, calm down, I know that’s not true, I’m just spouting a wild hypothetical, okay? If you decided to do that and I made sure it was really you and you hadn’t lost some sort of bet, then yeah, I’d still want you to be my brother. We’d still do stuff. I don’t give a shit what everyone else thinks.”
”…promise?”
Remus could sob with relief at actually hearing Roman’s voice come out, and he grins so wide his cheeks start to hurt. “I promise, Roro, I promise. You’re not lazy, you’re resting, and even if you were, I wouldn’t care.”
‘’M not trying to be lazy. It’s—I’m just—“
“Shh, shh, Roro, it’s okay,” The bag of chips falls to the ground and catches fire as Remus tugs his brother into his arms. “I’m right here. You’re doing so good, okay? Thomas is too.”
Remus doesn’t burn the house down because he’s had too many lectures from Janus about that, but he does get a big cartoon wrecking ball to smash the whole thing into smithereens.
He does burn the recliner though. And the plastic-covered couch. They deserved it.
5.
The latex gloves snap on as Roman sits on the edge of the tub with a grunt. He picks up the rest of the kit and sets it on the stool.
”Do you know what it’s about this time?”
“Someone said something about how immature Thomas is being about criticism and how he can’t take care of things, something like that.”
“Why did it manifest as acne, then?”
”I don’t know, maybe something about how teenagers who are hormonal and don’t really know how to take care of their skin get acne?”
Remus snorts. “Do people still not understand that acne happens and can happen to anyone regardless of age?”
‘Apparently not.”
“Well, they can go lick the Kraken’s crack.”
“Ew, Remus.”
“Just trying to keep the mood light.” He picks up one of the cotton swabs and a paper towel and leans down. “I’m gonna try and clean up some of the wet stuff first, okay? Then we can actually get onto some relief.”
“You’re not gonna pop any of them, are you?”
“I don’t think so. At least not right now.”
”Because I really don’t want this to scar.”
Remus hums, carefully running the swab over a particularly inflamed part of his cheek. “Can you give me a pain rating?”
”Like a 6? It’s not that bad but it’s not a pain I’m used to it’s…freaking me out.”
“Understandable, have a nice day. If it ever gets too much, let me know and we’ll switch to a cool pack, okay?”
Roman hums as Remus goes to work. A pile of discarded swabs and other trash accumulates at Remus’s elbow as he works patiently around the various, uh, ‘zones.’ They have to stop a few times when it gets to a point where Roman’s whole face just aches, waiting for it to subside enough that Remus can keep going.
“There are a couple down here that look like they’re ready to go, do you want me to just get ‘em out?”
”Be careful.”
“Sure, yeah. If it starts to hurt lemme know and I’ll back off right away.”
He gets a few of them, a few more putting up too much of a fight so he leaves them be. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Roman heroically stop two or three whimpers before he lightly jabs him in the stomach and tells him to knock that posturing shit off, he doesn’t need it here.
“…thanks, Re.”
“I told you, it hurts too much, I stop.”
“I know.” He shifts on the tub. “I think it’s just…hard to remember.”
Remus frowns, glancing up at him. Roman fiddles with the hem of his prince costume.
“You know…with the others?”
”No. I don’t know, Ro.”
“They don’t—they’re—they want Princey, Prince Roman. Not…the rest of this.” He waves his hand to indicate the cotton carnage. “So it’s hard to…”
He trails off when he sees the expression on Remus’s face.
“What?”
”You mean they don’t know?”
“Know what?”
“That this—“ he waves at Roman— “happens to you. Any of it.”
“I mean, they know I’m the Ego and it makes sense that I get hurt when Thomas feels bad, but—“
”But not how much.” Roman won’t meet his gaze. “Fuck, Ro.”
“…it’s complicated.”
“Shit, no, I’m not—look at me, Ro. I’m not mad at you. I’m just—this wasn’t what I’d hoped.”
Roman frowns. “What do you mean, what you hoped?”
Remus sighs. This is turning into way more of a conversation than he’d ever anticipated. Glancing around, he picks up the cold pack and hands to to Roman before taking a seat on the counter. His legs swing and kick at the cabinets with a quiet thunk-thunk, thunk-thunk.
“When the Split happened, and we went to the Dark Sides, I…dunno, I guess I thought it would be…better.”
“Because we were separated?”
“What? No, no, because I had the stuff like Deceit and Anxiety with me, so they couldn’t make any of this stuff worse—not that they would,” he says when Roman opens his mouth to protest, and wow, have they come a long way, “but just ‘cause…well, yeah. You had Logic and Morality, who were—doesn’t that make sense? That they would be able to help?”
Roman sighs. He picks at the edge of the ice pack. “It’s not that simple.”
“Then explain it to me.”
“Logan’s thing is object impermanence, you know that.” Remus winces in sympathy. “But having someone tell you something isn’t real when you can feel it and it is real, to you, that’s not…that’s not helpful. It’s better if he just goes right to Thomas than coming to me.”
“And Patton?”
Roman lets out a humorless huff. “Thomas is feeling bad and Patton is Thomas’s feelings. How do you think that normally goes?”
…yeah, probably not great.
“It’s not all bad,” he continues, softer now, “they’re at least good when I tell them I don’t want to be disturbed. They don’t ask questions if I tell them I don’t want to talk about it.”
“That feels suspiciously like the bare minimum.” Roman shrugs. “I know I literally just said the opposite, but do Janus and Virgil…?”
“They’re both better at comforting the others. It’s okay, Re, I have you. I really only want you when it’s…bad like this.”
“Me? Why?”
“You get it.”
Remus chuckles, getting back up and picking up the next tool. “That simple, huh?”
“Sometimes it’s just that simple.”
”Aw, I love you too, Roro. You’re the specialist baby brother any Side could ever ask for.”
“You—what the hell do you mean, ‘baby brother?’”
“You’re the baby brother.”
“I am not.”
“Are too.”
“Am not.”
“Are too. Now hush so I don’t accidentally poke your eye out.”
“I’m gonna get you back for this.”
“Oh, I’m so scared about that. Now hold still, Roro, let’s get this out of the way so you can feel better.”
“…love you.”
“I love you too.”
+1.
The Imagination is upset. Roman feels it the second he steps foot through the door and forgoes his normal prince costume for a rougher tunic and boots, strapping his sword to his hip and an emergency pack to his back. The wind blows frigid and punishing over the grass as he starts down the trail, squinting through the dust clouds whipping up around him. The clouds frown around the edges of the tree line, darkening to a stormy black near the edge of the coast. As he nears the black cliffs, rocks crumble beneath him and tumble into a churning sea.
He edges carefully around the craggy rock face, keeping his movements light and careful. Spray whips him in the face as thunder rolls in the distance. The chill near rips his fingers from their precarious handholds. He grits his teeth and keeps going, even as the wind howl so loudly his ears near split from the pain.
There, a little ways down the cliff, is a small cove. He inches his way around the edge of the bluff and drops onto a larger path leading him along the coast. There isn’t any sand here, only rough and unyielding stone. Froth and foam given them gleaming white teeth as the waves churn furiously around the mouth of the sea. He follows the path down, down towards he massive cracks in the sheer rock face, one eye on the black water below him. Despite being so close to the shore, there’s no sign of a bottom and he doesn’t want to risk how deep it is. There’s no telling what current might rip him into the open ocean if he falls in.
The cove is shaped like a spear’s point, the crack in the cliff at its very point as though some massive weapon had shattered the rocks themselves. As Roman nears it, the shadow at the base of the path slowly grows more and more defined, until he realizes that it’s a path through the cliff. The cove is an inlet leading into a hidden sea cave with a vast black lake in its center. Roman peers up at the glistening wet walls, hand on the wall as the wind whistles angrily by.
The water moves. He looks down. Something massive slips just underneath the surface, sending ripples to the shore. He crouches down and sees a huge shape getting closer and closer to the surface. An eye the size of a dining table glares up at him through the water and long arms with rows and rows of hooks reach up toward him.
“Ollie, it’s me. It’s Roman.”
The Kraken pause. The hooked arms retreat and he pokes his head up, letting out a mournful burble. Roman reaches over and taps the water. One of his other arms comes up and Roman pets soothingly along the skin.
“What’s the matter, buddy? What’s going on?”
Ollie burbles again and Roman suddenly realizes why the hooked arms were the ones to reach for him. Beneath the surface, the Kraken’s arms form a cradle of sorts, holding something close to the Kraken’s massive body. As the water shifts and ripples, the thing comes closer and closer to surface, slowly moving to reveal its precious cargo.
And there, nestled in the Kraken’s grip, covered in his own writhing tentacles, is Remus.
“Oh, Re,” Roman murmurs as his brother twitches and whimpers, “what happened? Who did this?”
Ollie burbles again, holding him out, and Roman balances on the edge of the shoreline and stretches to hold on. The Kraken lifts him up and into the cradle too, letting him touch Remus’s frigid skin and shake him awake.
“Re? Re, wake up, it’s okay, I’m here to help.”
The tentacles writhe as Remus stirs, blinking through a pained haze up at Roman. “…Ro?”
“Hey, Re, it’s me. It’s okay, you’re gonna be okay. What happened?”
“Thoughts got too loud.” A tentacle leaves a thick trail of slime across his arm and he shudders. “Sorry.”
“What could you have to be sorry for?”
“‘S gross.”
“You stop that,” Roman chides gently, running his fingers through Remus’s wet hair, “I don’t care if something’s gross, I care if it’s hurting you.”
Remus whimpers, clutching at one of Ollie’s arms. The Kraken squeaks back, trying in vain to warm him up, but there’s only so much he can do in this freezing cave. Roman glances around and bites his lip.
“Does it feel better in the water? Is that why you came down here?”
“Yeah. Ollie came and f-found me.”
Roman pats the worried Kraken. “What do we need to do? Is it like caring for Ollie’s arms?”
“N-no. Like helping the jelly—jellyfish with the twisted—twisted ones.”
He’ll bet just about anything that this frigid water isn’t helping Remus do that, and it’s not like Ollie has opposable thumbs. He goes to slide into the water himself but Ollie chirps in alarm, hoisting them higher.
“What’re you doing?”
“I’m trying to help.“
Remus shakes his head, more slime trailing across his shivering body. “Too cold for you.”
“Well, then it’s definitely too cold for you. Can we get you somewhere warmer?” Remus curls up a little more. “What about that pool near the glowstone trees?”
“That’s all the way on your side.”
“Ollie can take you. I’ll meet you over there.” Remus stays quiet. Roman leans down and brushes the wet hair from his eyes. “What else is bothering you, Re?”
Two of the tentacles glob onto Roman and start leaving trails of slime across his tunic. Remus whimpers and reaches out a hand to yank them away. It’s no use; the roiling mass just keeps smearing slime onto Roman as they try to pull him closer, no matter how hard Remus shoves them away.
Oh.
Oh.
“Re, you’re not too gross. You’re not going to ruin anything. I want you to come with me so I can help you. I care about you. Let me help, please?”
It takes a painfully long moment for Remus to peek up at him and nod. Roman can’t stop the way his shoulders sag in relief and he sits up, patting Ollie’s arm as the Kraken burbles happily.
“You…you really wanna help?”
“Of course I wanna help you, Re, you’re my brother.”
“Okay.”
“Have Ollie take you over to the pool, okay? I’ll meet you there.”
“How are you gonna get there?”
“I have my ways.”
Remus grumbles and he sounds just enough like his normal self that Roman has to reach down and ruffle his hair, no matter how much Remus squawks about it. He climbs back off to the shore and watches Ollie sinks below the surface before he makes his way out to the ocean proper. Taking the charm from beneath his tunic, he closes his eyes and concentrates.
A screaming cry and the massive thudding of wings splits the wind.
Roman’s dragon lands just on the other side of the bluffs and he climbs on, taking off and soaring over the stormy sea. The dragon calls out over the waves and far beneath, he can see the shape of Ollie swimming through the depths. The clouds begin to part as they near the opposite coast, sun rays splitting the worst of the storm as the glowing trees appear on the horizon.
Roman’s dragon sets him down just on the edge of the shimmering pool. He pats its snout and it huffs, lying down on the sun-warmed grass and closing its eyes. As he walks toward the pool and begins to take off his boots, he spots Ollie’s shade moving through the inlet into the warmer water. He chuckles at the way the water vibrates with the Kraken’s pleased rumble.
Clad in just his boxers, he slips into the water and through the tangle of arms to draw Remus into the warmth. Remus immediately tuns and clings to him like a limpet, shivering from the temperature change.
“I know, I know,” Roman murmurs as he starts to work his hands patiently through the mass of tentacles, “just hold onto me. I can still kind of stand here, I’ve got you.”
”You gonna take care of me?”
“Yeah, Re, I’m gonna take care of you.”
He’s rewarded with a sleepy hum and Remus snuggles into him. “You’re the best.”
“No, you’re the best. The best baby brother anyone could ever ask for.”
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
Remus might mutter an am not back, but it’s muffled by his tired slump into Roman’s arms. Roman just chuckles. He’s sure it’ll come up again at some point.
General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash  @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv  @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance@whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti@ultrageekygirl
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indig0-constellations · 2 months
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I like to think that after Ice died, Mav kept his shoes by the front door so that when he gets home after work and takes his shoes off it’s like Ice is still there in the house waiting for him to come home
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live with me forever now (just not for long, for long); October '23
Fall Out Boy, Heartbreak Feels So Good // The Farewell (2019) dir. Lulu Wang // Fall Out Boy, Hum Hallelujah // unknown // Amy Hempel // Erin Slaughter // Sally Wen Mao // Richard Siken // Laura Makabresku, The Anatomy of Melancholy // Trista Mateer // A Softer World // unknown // The Farewell // Hosho McCreesh // unknown // Fall Out Boy, Heaven, Iowa // The Farewell // Kaveh Akbar // locket engraved with words by E. E. Cummings (source unknown) // Panic! at the Disco, Trade Mistakes // Hieu Minh Nguyen
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ambrosiagoldfish · 2 months
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I loved your Adam x 3rd spouse piece! I think you really captured his personality! I also just really like you're writing style! You did an qmzyjob and I think you'll continue make amazing pieces like this? Have a wonderful day or night and continue to rest if you can! 🥰🥰🥰
Benefit of the doubt Pt.3
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Adam x 3rd Spouse! Reader
Viewer discretion is advised
Warnings: Hurt/Comfort, Angsty, General Adam TW’s, Reader HIGHKEY has a complex about being loved, Reader finally talks about their issues, Lucifer and Lilith scout for new kissing partner but fails miserably/hj, Lilith will probably be OOC in the future (once Season 2 comes), Adam has abandonment issues, Adam is a puppy in private but a bitch in public, And the couch returns once again (why do all the sad things happen on this couch), This is set way before the show, and Gn! Reader! (Annnnnd We popped the Y/n cherry! It’s used only once tho)
Part 1 Part 2 Part 4
Request box: Open
Word count: 3664
A/N: Hi!!! Thanks so much! I’m using your request as the ask for part 3 so I hope that’s ok! You all were so nice with all the love for part 1 and 2 😭😭🫶🫶 this part is also pretty long but I just couldn’t stop writing it. I wanted to do 1 more part set in the past before we jump to the angst that is the show. So I guess you could call this the penultimate part! A lot of people wanted to see Lucifer hit on Reader and try to do what he did with Lilith and Eve but with Reader. And I had quite a hard time coming up with a reason that could occur in the past but I think I figured it out.
Since Luci and Lilith would still be together at this time I’ve decided to add Lilith in as well for POLY GOALS. Also they may seem malicious but I genuinely don’t think they are (they just find Reader hot LBH) 😭😭 Also I added a few more people to the tag list!
Tags: @tired-of-life-86 @nervoussystemss @qopia @lovelyemily
It’s been a while since Adam first moved into your newly shared home. You weren’t sure exactly how long, it was hard to keep track of time in heaven. Days seemed to blur together. It made sense to you at least, it is heaven after.
After Adam moved in, your life was filled with so many new things to experience with him, and the same was true for him. While he may seem a bit brutish, (and at times he can be) he loved the new things you showed him, the new feelings you showed him.
You were so kind, so thoughtful and so, so patient with him. You never forced him to do something he didn’t want to do but you would still push him to explore new things, even managing to convince him to be a part of heaven's official duties. That’s why, at times like these, you knew exactly what to do.
The sound of Adam slamming the front door as he entered the house made you jump. Even from a few feet away, you could hear him mumbling curses about something as he plopped himself down on the couch. You followed quickly behind, gently laying next to him
“Hey, what’s wrong?” You try to keep your voice light and soothing. Looking at him it was obvious that something was bothering him. The gold feathers of his wings were unkempt from them flaring up, his halo was slightly crooked and his LED mask showed an almost snarled expression.
Your hand slowly caressed his wings, moving the out of place feathers back to normal. But no matter how hard you tried they would stick back out.
“It’s nothing, just some lame shitty meeting I have to go to tomorrow” he crosses his arms and looks away from you.
“Hmm? Something tells me there’s more to it than that, right?” You snuggle into his belly, rubbing it softly .
His mask pouts “Dammit’ bitch, how do you always see through me, huh?” He sighs defeatedly before continuing “You know how more people are starting to kick the bucket or whatever? Well, heaven’s worried about the surplus of sinners so they're having the aforementioned shitty meeting to come to a solution and…”
He pauses
“And?” You look at him anticipatingly
“And… He’ll be there.” Oh… So that's why he’s upset. “They’re having the meeting in their brand new “heaven embassy” down in hell.” His voice mocks
“Oh, I’m so sorry Adam, Have you tried asking Sera if you can sit this one out?”
Adam groans, putting his face in his hands “Yeah like forty fucking times but she keeps saying that it’s my “heavenly duty” and she won’t let me.”
You bring your arms around Adam’s neck pulling him in towards you. You weren’t sure what to do if you were being honest. There’s nothing you can do really, if even Sera won’t let him miss it. Hmm…
“Adam, I know it’s gonna suck but if you can’t get out of it, then that’s that.” Adam looks at you a little confused “but I can go with you, I’m sure Sera wouldn’t mind an extra pair of hands in the discussion.”
“What! Hell no!” He shouted as he sat up from the couch, shaking his head defiantly.
You look at him confused, “Why?”
“That’ll only make the whole thing fucking worse! If it’s just me, I don’t have to worry that he’ll get anywhere near you!” Adam’s mask turns into a slight grimace as he attempts to keep his eyes off you.
You make your way to him, the sound of your footsteps falling off as you stop in front of him. You grab his hand as the other one moves up to his face, cupping it.
“Adam…” you rubbed circles on his hand as you continued “We’re partners. You haven’t forgotten my promise right?” You play with the golden ring on his finger.
Adam groans “No, I haven’t… sigh Shit- Fine! But… just stay by me, alright?” Your face lights up before your arms wrap around his shoulders joining you both in an embrace
“Of course,” you rub his wings gently before you grasp his hands in yours, leading him by them. “Come on, you must be tired right? It’s getting late. Couch or bed?”
“Couch. I’m way not in the mood to make a bed right now.” You laugh at his comment as you pull him to lay on the couch with you. His soft, warm body pushes up against you as you both slowly drift off to sleep for the day ahead.
-
A not-too familiar sight laid before you, the pearly gates of heaven, guarded by the one and only Saint Peter. There was no real reason for you to ever come here. You never had the chance to die, which is when most, if not all Winners see it for the first time. No one’s allowed to leave heaven unless given permission by a higher up and on top of all that, you weren’t really that enticed to leave the oh-so perfect afterlife, so there had never been a reason to see these golden gates.
But now, here you were standing behind them with some other angels. You didn’t know most of them, the only ones you recognized were Sera and Adam. As expected, it was pretty easy to convince Sera to let Adam take you along. They even prepared an extra wide seat for both of you to share. How generous!
Ever since you woke up this morning, Adam had been… Nervous? Scared? The right word doesn’t really matter but he’s been sweating buckets and was clearly more agitated than normal. His feathers were once again unkempt and you tried your best to keep them in order but he always seemed to get them messy.
Eventually, right on schedule, a flaming portal opened in front of the group. Sera was the first to enter, then followed by the others. Finally it was just you and Adam but as you take a step towards the portal, Adam stops you
“What is it?” You look up at him.
“Just… stay by me, ok?” Adam’s voiced was softer than normal, a way he only did when you two were alone
Nodding your head with a smile, your hand comes down and interlocks his. One of his bright golden wings veils itself around you, bringing you closer to him. You snuggle into him slightly before you both step into the portal.
You didn’t know what to expect when you stepped through the portal but a sight that was almost like home awaited you. The familiar gold that heaven was so fond of was everywhere in the building, accents of white and orange were also present. All and all, it was a familiar sight in a not-so familiar place.
But there was definitely something that wasn’t familiar in that place. Sitting in a chair at the end of the room was him, Lucifer Morningstar. The aura he had definitely made him seem angelic but there was clearly something about him that separated himself from divinity. Though you do have to admit that he was much shorter than you anticipated.
There was something that surprised you however, to his left sat a tall woman with long blond hair and horns. It took you a second to put 2&2 together but when you heard Adam mutter “Shit…” you knew immediately it was Lilith. And from Adam’s reaction even he wasn’t expecting her to be there.
You squeeze his hand gently as comfort, giving him a smile before you both walk to your seat. Your body is pushed closer to him as his wing wraps tighter around you. Looks like there’s no calming him down.
Finally the meeting starts, Sera begins by explaining the issue of the fast growing population in hell, leading to groups trying to form uprisings against heaven. To be honest you didn’t really understand it too well, just a lot of business-y sounding words that weren't really your forte. So you just stayed quiet.
From what you could tell, the meeting was going… well? They haven’t been able to agree on a proper decision even with Sera leading the conversation. Adam though, was being eerily quiet. You don't even think he’s said a word since you both got there. Sera seemed to notice this.
“Adam, want to share any ideas?” Sera spoke in an encouraging tone slightly gesturing to him. This seemed to catch Lucifer and Lilith’s attention. Maybe they didn’t recognize Adam because of the mask?
Adam was caught off guard but still talked “Oh uh… Man, I don’t know, can’t we just fucking kill them?” Both you and Sera looked over in surprise, “What? That would solve the problem wouldn't it? “ He shrugged
Sera sighed “Ok, how about we take a short recess to clear our minds to let in new ideas. We’ll resume the meeting in 30 minutes”
With that, everyone went their separate ways for the time being, you and Adam were the first to leave the board room, he practically was pulling you along and you could tell he wanted out of there. You both ended up in the lobby, neither of you saying a word.
The silence was so very loud. The only sound was yours and Adam’s breathing. Adam’s hand was still firmly tied to yours, not even the slightest hint of letting go. You rubbed your thumb in circles over his hand when a voice echoed through the air
“Adam, may I have a word?” Sera’s voice echoed lightly through the lobby. She gestured to a door next to her. You both made your way over to her and was about to go in when Sera put her hand in front of Adam stopping him
“What the hell Sera?!”
“Alone, please.”
Adam’s LED eyes widened his mouth slightly agape. He looked down with a scowl before turning his face to you. Your free hand going up to his mask, caressing it.
“Go talk with Sera,”
“But-“
“Shh, I’ll be fine,” You give him a kiss on the cheek, the cold of the metallic mask reaching your lips, “I’ll just be in the lobby, I won’t go anywhere till you get back. Ok?” Adam didn’t look at you, clearly avoiding eye contact, you grab his chin lightly and gently turn him to look at you,
“Ok?”
Adam’s mouth formed a frown and he groaned “Fuck- fine, ok…” You gave him a smile as Sera walked into the room, you felt his grip loosen and loosen, until finally his soft hand left yours as he walked into the room. He gave one final look back before closing the room's door.
Silence filled the air once again. It wasn’t like it was with Adam, that comfortable silence that you shared ever so often. This one laid in the air, thick and heavy, threatening to suffocate you at any given moment. You sat on one of the many yellow and white sofas in the lobby.
You tried your best to ignore it. Paying attention to less important details about the scenery around you. The weird zigzagging pattern of the carpet of the floor, the intricate designs on the doors, the huge windows. Heaven sure had a unique taste in interior design.
You tried so hard to ignore the silence that you eventually ignored the sound that broke said silence. Footsteps began echoing through the lobby approaching you. You didn’t realize someone was next to you until you heard a voice say.
“Ahem Hello!” A male voice startled you as it chimed in with a sickening sweet tone. You look towards the direction of the voice only to be greeted by the king of hell himself, Lucifer. You jumped back to the other side of the sofa in shock.
“Oh sorry, I didn’t mean to scare ya.” He chuckled softly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m Lucifer, But judging on your reaction, I guess you already knew that. I’ve never seen you before so you must be relatively new, right?”
You nodded your head sheepishly to answer his question. You honestly didn’t know what else to do, what could you do? You slowly picked yourself up from the sofa.
“I’m sorry but I have to go-“ you turn to leave only to bump into a tall woman. You must have been so surprised by Lucifer that you completely missed Lilith coming up behind you.
“But we haven’t even learned your name yet, Dear.” The woman’s voice sounded both somber but also welcoming, it was quite frightening how much it could calm your nerves if you kept listening to it. “How about we talk? No harm in it, right?”
“That’s a wonderful idea, Darling!” Lucifer came up from behind you, a sharp smile on his face. “Come on, sit and chat!”
Crap… they had you cornered. You had no telling what they’d do if you set them off, you wanted the meeting to go as smoothly as possible, for Adam. A few minutes to indulge them. that’s it.
You bit your lip but sighed “Ok… but just a few minutes”
“Great!” Lilith took your shoulders moving you to sit down beside her as Lucifer sat on the other side, sandwiching you between them. “So, I’ll ask again, what’s your name?”
You hesitated for a moment but decided it was better to get the conversation over with as quickly as possible.
“Y/n”
“That’s a very beautiful name,” Lucifer spoke, his tone trying to make him sound almost charming, almost. “So, if you don’t mind us asking, who are you to… Adam?” He gestured over to the door Sera and Adam went through earlier.
“I’m his spouse.” This time you answered with complete confidence, not even a shred of hesitation in your voice.
“Ah!” Lucifer nodded his head in understanding. “How’s that going?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I for one know how much of a hassle that man-child is,” Lilith laughs, covering her mouth slightly “I asked around, is it true he hasn’t taken that ridiculous mask off since he got it, hmm? Has he even shown you his real face yet?”
“No but-“
“He can be so… tiresome at times, don’t you agree?”
“No. I don’t. Adam is the best thing to ever happen to me-“
“Exactly.” Lucifer interrupted you as your eyes furrowed “You don’t have anything else to compare it to. Of course you’d see trash like the “first man” as the best thing ever.”
Trash. That word really set you off, at least it would have, if it wasn’t for the next sentence .
“But hey! It’s fine! Eve was the same way! You too are honestly very alike, let me tell you-“
Thousands upon thousands of thin threads binding you up. That’s what this conversation felt like. Each annoyance was just a new thread getting tighter and tighter as they were pulled taut, threatening to simply slice through your body, your soul. But they didn’t, instead they kept stretching past their limits until finally those words came.
Like… Eve. It felt like each of those tightly pulled threads were all cut at once with those words. Any and all tension suddenly seemed to disappear. A strange sensation of losing any care about your situation.
You know what? To hell with the meeting! You quickly stood up from the sofa causing them both to jump slightly. You turned toward them, your voice was louder than you thought was possible for you. You weren’t sure what had gotten into you but you felt so… Angry.
“I am nothing like Eve. And I’m especially nothing like either of you.” You had enough, it was untelling what would happen if you stayed. You started walking toward the room Adam was in when Lucifer grabbed your arm
“Wait! That’s not what I meant-“
“Don’t touch me, snake” you stared daggers at him before quickly grabbing his hand and shoving it off.
“We’re sorry if we upset you Dear, but that’s no way to talk to someone” Lilith walks up to you, putting an arm in front of Lucifer in a protective stance.
You walk up to the tall woman, she was at least two heads taller than you but still, you barred your teeth before speaking “Oh! You really think I care about what the first whore thinks of me, Huh?” Your voice dripped with poison from every word.
Even Lilith seemed caught off guard by your sudden change in demeanor as her face turned into a scowl. Red horns protruded through Lucifer’s head, his eyes turning red with anger. You turn your attention back to him.
“What are you gonna do?” Lucifer’s gaze slightly softened with hesitation “Exactly, nothing. Less’ you want to dig yourself deeper into this cyst pool you’ve created for yourself and end up on even worse terms with heaven.”
Without even sparing them a glance, you try to make it to the room, only to be greeted by Adam and Sera standing by the door. How long were they standing there? You must have not heard them over your screaming..
“What the fuck are you assholes doing to them? ” You rush over and grab him by the hand, the action startling him “Babe, what happened-“
“Nothing. Sera. Open a portal back home.”
“But-“
“Sera!” Your voice was gritty and rough “open a portal. Now... Please…” your voice cracked at the end
Sera had never seen you show so much anger before, but here you were, your entire gaze filled with nothing but pure unadulterated wrath.Threatening to burn anyone who got in your way. Whatever happened clearly set you off like nothing else before.
Sera nods her head “Understood”
“Thank you…”
A familiar flaming portal opened up, you quickly made your way through it with Adam following suit. The portal ended up right inside your home, closing as you both were fully through. You honestly didn’t know where you were going but eventually your body couldn’t go any further than the couch
Feeling the soft couch beneath you made your aching muscles feel like they were melting away, and only then did you realize that you were crying.
Adam crawled next to you, hugging close to you. “What the happened out there, Babe?”
You felt your body slowly break down, as more tears left you then you had cried your entire existence. Adam hugged you tighter, his wings coming over you like a blanket.
“H-How much did you see?” Your voice was shaky as you sniffed slightly.
“Not a lot, just some shit towards the end,what did those bastards say to you?”
You cleared your throat slightly. “I only talked to them because I didn’t want them to get upset and ruin the meeting and make your day even worse than it already was”
Adam’s LED mask shifted into a small sad frown “Sweetheart, you never have to talk to any motherfuckers you don’t want to, let alone for me. “
You smile but look away “it wasn’t… it wasn’t…” you tried to get the words out but couldn’t. You took a deep breath before trying one more time,”It wasn’t the only thing that set me off.” Adam looks at you curious
“They said that I reminded them of… Eve, and it just made me so… angry. I was created for you, to love you-“ your tears start swelling back up as you spoke “I want to be so much better than Eve, than Lilith for you. And then she pointed out how I’ve never seen Your face, which I’ve always been fine with, but at that moment, I started to think ‘what if they’re right?’ What if the reason you don’t want me to see you is because I also remind you of Eve”
You choked back tears “So to be compared to her when I’ve tried so hard… if I’m not better than her for you, then what is even the point of me! I was created to make you happy, if I can’t do that better than someone who hurt you so bad then I’m just useless-“
Soft lips met yours, cutting you off. This felt different than what you normally got on the cheek. It was warm compared to the cold metallic feel you’ve felt previously. Your eyes opened slightly looking at Adam’s LED mask… or what you thought was going to be a mask. He had pulled his mask off while you were crying.
You pulled back from the kiss “Adam your mask!” Adam just kisses back again
“That fucking thing doesn’t matter right now.” He paused “You're not useless and will never be useless to me. Fuck- I love you because I love you! Not because you were created for me or some stupid shit like that! You make me so fucking happy. I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you were just some object that was made to make me feel better, because you aren’t.”
“Adam…” to think tears could roll down your face this harder than before “I love you so much Adam” you cry into his soft chest.
Adam kisses you again “I love you too Sweetcheeks.” Adam paused before clearing his throat “So umm… how do I look? I hope I didn't disappoint you…”
You look up at his newly unveiled face, just as you had been told, short brown hair, golden eyes, and a little bit of stubble on his chin. By all accounts, he was completely ordinary. So ordinarily perfect.
“Perfect. So so perfect. What’d I do to end up with such a handsome husband, hmm?”
“Oh stop, now you’re just being fucking cheesy” he laughs, he would never admit it but his eyes were a little watery just from hearing you say that.
“It’s true though” you lean in and wrap your arms around him, killing you both with a deep kiss.
Truly ordinary. You couldn’t be happier
1K notes · View notes
eddiesxangel · 4 months
Note
Could you do a smutty Eddie Munson fic where he’s your older brother’s bsf?
maybe reader has had a crush on Eddie for a while and when she finally decides to move on and date someone Eddie gets jealous?
What Eddie Doesn’t Know | Eddie x f!reader
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AN: I hope you enjoy it! Sorry it took a while to complete. Thank you for the request; I haven’t been inspired by anything non-Christmas-themed in a while. I was literally barking at the trope.
wc: 7.1k oops
Cw: f!reader, reader is 19 and in collage and Eddie is 22 and a full time mechanic, reader goes by a nickname, jealous Eddie, jealous reader, angst, cheating (on the reader but not by Eddie), smut (pet names, oral, dirty talk, p in v), the fluffy ending!
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Pathetic. That was how you felt at this moment in time. Here you were at your college homecoming party, and all you could do was be a wallflower, watching in self-pity as the love of your life. ( who doesn’t know is the love of your life) is pressed up on some girl in the back of the room.
"What are you doin' here, Tink?" you pop out of your daze to see your older brother, Adam, addressing you.
Did your parents name you Tink? No. Were you so obsessed with Peter Pan as a child you demanded to go by Tinkerbell? Yes. The nickname kinds just stuck.
"I go here?" You sass him back.
"This party is for upperclassmen only. How did you get in?" Adam was only three years older.
"Eddie's here, and he doesn't even attend school..." You gave him a pointed look.
"Yeah, cuz he is my best friend... like I said, how did you get in?"
"It's a house party, not Studio 54... I walked in."
"I'm going to kill Cory," He mumbled under his breath. Cory was supposed to be manning the door.
"Yeah, you should definitely get better security, all I had to do was let him feel up my tits, and we walked right on in..."
The Neanderthal didn't actually touch you, but the look on Adam's face when you let Adam believe he did? Priceless. You only lied so Adam would leave you alone.
What actually happened was you, Nancy, and Robin scaled the fence and got in through the back door.
"Cory!" Before you knew it, Adam was out of your hair, and you were back to being a wallflower….
"Tink there you are! You wanna continue to mope in the corner, or do you wanna get out of here?" your two best friends/roomies, Robin and her girlfriend Nancy, approach you.
"I guess let's just go." you sigh.
You can no longer bear the sight of Eddie, the boy you've been crushing on since the sixth grade, and your older brother’s best friend, leading the random girl up the stairs hand in hand.
Your stomach lurched at the thought of her hands running all over his body, how he would be on her, kissing her... inside of her. He didn't even know you were here... You should have gone up to him, maybe said hello. Perhaps he would have seen the ridiculous amount of effort you put into your ensemble just to catch his eye. But your efforts were lacking because, to him, you're always going to be Adam's annoying little sister.
You knew you had to get over this, but how could you? He has been in your life for fifteen years and always will be. Adam and Eddie have been friends for as long as you can remember. Your brother stuck by him throughout Eddie's family struggles. Your parents even took him in for a few weeks before CPS found his uncle took over full custody. He was basically your big brother, too, until your pesky teenage hormones started to kick in, and boom! You've been head over heels ever since.
''Good, let's get some greasy burgers and fries to end the night, ok?" Robin smiled.
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In the 24-hour diner on campus, you were sitting at your regular booth with the girls across from you, eating your feelings, trying not to think about what Eddie was doing with that girl.
"So that party was a bust, huh?" Nancy spoke first.
"Yeah, totally... probably because Adam's house hosted." You giggled.
"Not to mention Eddie still didn't see you -OUCH." Robin looked over at Nancy, who was giving her a look of distaste. "Sorry, I meant he is an idiot, and you need to get over him! There are plenty of eligible guys on campus who you could date!"
"Even though my girlfriend is being is harsh, she is right, Tink. It's been so long, and you'll kill yourself over this if you keep this up."
"Ugh, I know! Do you think I'm a masochist or something? I hate to break it to you, but I do not enjoy this. I hate it. I hate that he is the one I think about every day when I wake up. I hate it when I go to sleep; he is the last person on my mind. He takes over my thoughts, and I don't know how to stop it!" You shove a fry into your mouth so you can take a breather.
"What if we found you a new guy? Someone to take your mind off Eddie?" Nancy perked up at her idea.
You heard the diner doorbells chime from behind you.
"I don't know..." Putting all your time and energy into someone new seemed like a lot of emotional work you wanted to avoid going through.
"Yes! Oh my god, Tink, you have to. It's the only way you'll get over him!"
"Get over who?" The silky, sweet voice of a male came from behind you.
You and the girls froze as Eddie, your brother, and a few other guys approached the table.
"No one." You mumbled, trying to fight off the blood rushing across your chest and cheeks.
"You can tell us, Tink! Who are we fighting?" Eddie laughed.
"Tink? What kind of stupid name is that?" one of Adam's jerk friends spoke.
"Excuse me?" you turn to see the guy you've never met.
You heard Adam burst out laughing with the rest of them, but not Eddie.
"Hey man, not cool!" Eddie stood up for you.
And there went the butterflies in your stomach. Eddie was always your protector. Even as kids, when Adam picked on you, he always stood up for you. Even if you weren't around, Eddie always put Adam in his place when it came to you.
You saw, out of the corner of your eye, Eddie shifted his weight down so he could sit beside you. Then, you felt a protective arm wrap around your shoulder.
Fuck. This shit right here is why you can never get over Eddie Munson.
You dared to look up; there he was in all his glory. The way the fluorescent light from above had cast down on him made him look like an angel. He smiled at you, but not before you noticed the dishevelled sex hair he tried to fix and the small amount of pink lipstick that stained the skin on his neck that he didn't quite get off. And the smell… sickly sweet perfume that was definitely not his signature musk.
You quickly turn your head back to your plate because you think you're about to puke up everything you just ingested…
"You, if you don't leave us alone." Robin piped up. She saw the look of pure disappointment in your eyes. You didn't need Eddie to rub in the fact that he hooked up with someone, especially since now he is smelling like a cheap hooker.
Robin and Nancy thought it was incredibly rude of your brother to flaunt Eddie in front of you like this. Of course, he knew your mega super infinity crush on his best friend. Yet here he is with his drunk-ass buddies, antagonizing you about the guy you needed to get over.
"Woah, Birdie, take it easy; we are just saying hello," Adam chimed in.
“You said hello at the party. Now leave!” You gritted through your teeth.
“You were at the party?” Eddie asked. His voice hitched high. High enough, it was embarrassingly so. Thankfully, his friends were too drunk and hungry to realize. A deep blush crossed his face when he saw you noticed the tone in his voice change. You just have a slight nod and continue to play with the food on your plate.
That’s why you were so dressed up. Eddie thought you looked so pretty, too pretty to be sad about some looser in a diner at one in the morning.
"Do we have a problem here?" A voice none of you recognized came from the booth beside you.
You all look over and see a cute guy with blonde hair and blue eyes wearing your school's rugby jersey. He was so not your type, but you can still admire beauty for what it is. He was a jock; that was clear as he stood up. He was big, more significant than your brother and Eddie, that's for sure.
"Nah, man, it's cool. This is my little sister and her friends." Adam slurs. Clearly, he had more shots since he left you to find Cory.
"I don't care who you are. You're clearly bothering them."
"It's okay, they were just leaving," Nancy said confidently.
"Whatever, let's go, guys," Adam commanded the pac, but Eddie lingered. He didn't like this blondie guy. He didn't like the way he was looking at you.
"Ed, come on!'
Eddie got up and slowly made his way to his friends.
"I'm Jesse," Eddie heard the musclehead speak, and he cringed internally. Something wasn't right. The feelings of anger and protectiveness were filling his mind.
Eddie looked back again and saw you smelling at the stranger as he reached out to shake your hand before sitting beside you.
What kind of freak is alone in a diner at 1:15 am? Eddie thought.
But it didn't seem to phase you or the girls; you were all blinded by his shiny hair and pearly white smile.
Eddie walked out and felt like he wanted to punch something. He needed to get away. He needed to know what the fuck was wrong with him? Why was he feeling this way? Why were you the one causing him distress? You were just Tink? Or so Eddie thought.
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Jesse turned out to be really cool. You exchanged numbers, and he asked you to go to the movies next Friday. You hadn’t been on a date in forever; you had been so hung up on Eddie that any other guy seemed uninteresting. But this time, you were determined that Jesse would be the one to break the cycle. He was much different than you’re generally into, but you have some of the same interests, like movies and music, so you thought you’d go for it.
Jesse picked you up, bought the tickets, and insisted on buying the snacks and drinks. He held your hand and then slowly made his way to wrap his arm around your shoulder. It gave you butterflies you hadn’t felt from anyone else. Before you knew it, you willingly leaned in to make out with him in the back of the theatre.
You were so focused on Jesse that you didn’t notice Eddie was also on a date in the same theatre. But Eddie noticed you. He was seething the whole time. He didn’t pay any attention to his date or the movie. He hogged the popcorn and munched away as he watched you giggle and flirt with the blockhead jock. Eddie didn’t care that he had pissed off his date. He hardly said two words to her when they parted ways, not even offering to drive her home.
He didn’t want to go out with her but had hooked up with her at the party and felt terrible about it then. Now, he can’t even remember her name or why he went upstairs with her in the first place.
You were there, at the party, but he didn’t see you. Now he sees you everywhere, and it’s pissing him off. Why were you on his mind all of the time? For the past week, why have his dreams been consumed by you and you alone? Why did he want to hold you, be with you, talk to you, dare he say… kiss you? You were Adam’s little sister. Well, not so little anymore. You were a late bloomer, but boy, did you bloom.
Eddie hated how the blonde meathead’s hand rested too low on your back. His hands grazed your skirt a little too closely. Eddie wanted to jump the guy, but he couldn’t. He was twice his size. He would be pulverized, and that would be mortifying in front of you. You wouldn’t want him like that anyway, even if he did win in a fight over you!
What the fuck was Eddie thinking? He wasn't… that's the problem. He's now thinking about getting into a physical altercation over you. He isn't able to sleep now without thinking about you. He needed to get his head on straight and quit fucking around. He hoped that if he just focused on the cars at work, this little thing would go away on its own. Maybe he can't remember that he had slipped and hit his head? Yeah, that's it. He hit his head, and now his brain is just confused. He didn't like you like that! This will all go away by tomorrow.
Wrong.
Eddie was plagued with thoughts of you. He caught himself in numerous daydreams about you while doing mindless tuneups and tire changes at the shop. It was getting out of hand; it’s been another week, and he still can’t get you off his mind… Eddie needed to be proactive. The guys were starting to give him shit about it too. They knew he was focused on a girl. They could sense it.
There was another party tonight that Adam mentioned. He will go home and get cleaned up. Then he will go to the party, he will find a nice pretty girl who will let him bury himself inside her, to forget about his thoughts of splitting your open with his cock, and this will all be over.
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You walked into the party hand in hand with Jesse. He was starting to make waves in your life, being only two weeks, but still. He would walk you to your classes and help you study in the library. He would walk you home and kiss you goodbye like the perfect gentleman. He hadn't tried making any advances as of yet. The two of you had only made it to first base. Maybe tonight you would get lucky? You felt ready.
“You want something to drink?” Jesse guided you to the kitchen.
The house was hot and sticky; you were worried about your hair getting frizzy. You worked so hard on it to look good for Jesse. He even complimented it when he picked you up. Forever the gentleman.
“Whatever they have is good.” You smiled up at him.
As the two of you walked into the packed kitchen, you tried to squeeze your way around but got stuck in the crowd. It was much easier for Jesse to get by just with his size alone.
“Excuse me,” you repeated three times, but no one was budging.
“You should be a little bit more assertive,” the voice behind you said. It sent a shiver down your spine.
As you turned, you saw Eddie smirking down at you. He was drunk. You could see that and smell it.
“Hi, Eddie.” You smiled meekly before you felt the weight of Jesse’s arm wrap around you, passing you your drink.
“There you are,” Jesse smiled. "Who's this?"
"That's just Eddie...Eddie, Jesse. Jesse, Eddie." You introduced awkwardly.
Just Eddie. The words stung.
"How do the two of you know each other?" Jesse gestures between the two of you.
"Brothers best friend." You smile.
"That's all I am to you? You wound me, Tink."
The fuck was that supposed to mean?
"Eddie, man! I got us two hotties over by the pool. Let's go!" In comes your obnoxious brother with perfect timing, as always.
"I guess I'll see you around." Eddie sighed.
"Nice meeting you, man." Jesse stuck out his hand.
"Whatever." Eddie brushed him off and left with Adam.
"I'm sorry about him. That was very rude. I don't?- He's usually not like that?"
"It's okay; I can tell a jealous guy when I see one." Jesse shrugged.
You almost spat out your drink. "Jealous?!"
"Oh, it's clear as day, honey."
"No... there is no way. He's never and will never like me... like that." It broke your heart to say that out loud. Your chest felt so heavy as the words came out of your mouth.
As the rest of the night went on, you and Eddie tried avoiding one another like the plague. Those words about him being jealous were swimming around in your head for most of the night, and Eddie was trying to avoid his feelings by being with another girl, but not one stood out to him.
Adam tried getting lucky but struck out when Eddie refused to go with the friend.
"What the fuck is your problem, man? She was like a solid eight out of ten."
"I wasn't into it..." Eddie's eyes found you, and he couldn't break his gaze. You were curled up in the blockhead's lap, sitting by the fire pit, all cozy and giggly. What he would give to have you in his arms like that.
"Oh fuck, not you now." Adam groaned in frustration, seeing where Eddie's googly eyes were directed.
"Huh?" Eddie said absentmindedly, not really paying attention.
"You can't be serious?! That's my little sister, dude; come on!" Adam was always one for the dramatics; that's why he and Edie got on so well.
"Woah, man, I never said anything about your sister."
"Well, it sure is clear by the way you're making heart eyes at her."
"Yeah, right," Eddie scoffed.
"Trust me, dude, it's that same way she looks at you." Adman shook his head. He thought he would be clear of this. That this would never happen, and yet here it is, happening.
"Wait, what? What do you mean?-"
"She's been in love with you since she was twelve... come one like you didn't know?"
"No way, you smoked too much tonight, so something? Maybe my stuff is off?"
"She likes you, dude. Never fucking shuts up about you."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Didn't think it was relevant... I was never going to allow her to be with you! You serious? It's Tink, she's so...ew. You're so above that."
"She's not new," Eddie snapped. He hated how hard Adam had always been on you.
"Whatever, man, too late now. About time she has moved on."
Eddie stood up and walked out of the party without a word. He heard Adam call out, but he ignored him completely. He needed to process what Adam told him. He needed to sober up so he could think clearly. He needed to either make you his or find a way to get over you... and fast.
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That night of the party, you didn't end up getting lucky. You tried making advances, but you inevitably were shot down. He said he didn't want your first time to be when you both had been drinking and in some random bathroom. So you accepted it, even though your horny gremlin was starting to come back to life. But what did happen was he asked you to make it official with him, and you said yes!
Tonight, you had to leave the apartment for your roommate's sake. It was their anniversary, and you told them you could have the place to themselves for a romantic evening. When you told Jesse, your new boyfriend, you needed a place to crash, he offered you his bed. You would go to your classes and then return to his for your first sleeepover as a couple. You were so excited!
Jesse ended class at one in the afternoon that day, and you ended at five, so it worked out perfectly. Luckily enough for you, your professor for your last lecture was ill, so they cancelled class that day. You thought it would be fun to surprise him by showing up early.
When you got to his house, his roommate let you in and said he was in his room with his friend Connor. So when you knocked on the door and walked in a few seconds later, you did not expect to see the two men in bed, naked...
You screamed and covered your eyes, absolutely mortified that you had walked in on them. You were so unbelievably hurt that you had been deceived. Why would he ask you to be exclusive if he was sleeping around?! And on the night when you thought you would get to have sex with your new boyfriend.
You did not give Jesse any time to explain himself as he tried to get out of the tangled sheets and arms of the other man. You heard your name being called out, but you ran out of there like a bat out of hell.
Tears stung your cheeks as the cold autumn air began to settle in. The rumble of the dark clouds was also looking quite ominous.
Just your luck. Of course, you would find your boyfriend in the arms of another man, and of course, the universe would make you walk him in the rain. How poetic.
A crack of thunder rumbled in the distance, and that's when the rain came down in buckets. At least it could cover up your tears. You continued walking, but you couldn't think of a place to go? You could not ruin your roommate's night. There is no way Adam would let you stay in his frat house, not that you would want to anyway, and your friends from the class went home for the weekend. Shit... maybe you could spend the majority of the night in the diner and then just walk home really late once they were defiantly sleeping. But your clothes were soaked and---
“Tink, what’s wrong?” you were snapped out of your thoughts by none other than the man who was the cause of this whole mess.
Eddie rolled down the work van window. He was covered in motor oil and dirty from working all day. His muscles ached, and he badly needed a hot shower, but now all he could focus on was you and why you were upset.
“Leave me alone, Eddie.” He hadn’t ever heard you speak to him like this?
“Tink, come on, it’s a literal thunder storm. Let me take you home.”
“Can’t, girls are having date night… told them to have the place to themselves.” You continued to walk as the chill from the rain was beginning to seep through to your bones. Your teeth betray you as the chatter starts.
“Where were you supposed to be right now?”
“None of your business!”
“Tink, don’t make me pull over!”
“Screw you, Eddie!”
“That’s it.” Eddie parked the car and got out. “You’re coming with me.” Eddie picked you up over his shoulder, and you let out a screech.
“Eddie! Put me down, you caveman!” You screamed. If anyone saw you, it looked like you were being kidnapped and taken into a murder van.
“No, can do Tink. I’m taking you home to warm you up. Then you’re going to tell me what the fuck is going on.” He commanded. And if you weren’t so mad, you’d say you were a little turned on by his voice.
You hear the car door open before he plops you into the passenger seat.
“Get in” he points to your legs hanging out of the car.
“Make me.” you shiver.
“You’re being such a child! Let me help you.”
“Fine!” You swing your legs into the van, and Eddie slams the door closed, making you wince.
The car ride was quiet besides the radio and your chattering teeth. You tried to wrap your arms around yourself, but it was of no help. Your t-shirt and jeans clung to you like a second skin, and the car heater was only blowing cool air. You swore you thought your nipples could cut glass.
Eddie said nothing as he tugged you over on the bench seat and wrapped a warm arm around you. You broke out into another chill, but this time, you weren't sure if it was from the rain or from Eddie.
Even though Eddie was self-conscious of smelling like motor oil and body odour, he was more worried about you catching hypothermia.
Once you were inside Eddie's warm apartment, he noticed how your body was on display. You would be the clear winner if you were in a wet t-shirt contest, that's for sure. Eddi's eyes were wide with desire, but he returned to reality when you asked if you could use his shower to warm up.
Eddie nodded absentmindedly as he thought about you being naked in his shower.
"Uh, you mind if I borrow a towel and some dry clothes? I have mine, but they got soaked through my overnight bag..."
"Yeah! Uh- I mean, sure, yeah, whatever..."
You blushed slightly at Eddie, trying to play it cool. He ran to his bedroom and returned with a handful of different fabrics. You took them and then headed into the bathroom.
The hot water defrosted your bones, and when you stepped into Eddie's clothes, his sent hit you like a tidal wave. You brought the old black corroded coffin band tee that he had from high school up to your nose and inhaled deeply. You felt immediate comfort being here, with Eddie, wearing his clothes.
As you stepped out of the bathroom, hair wrapped in the towel, Eddie couldn't help but smile at the sight of you.
"Not a word," you warn.
Eddie mock zipped his lips, then gestured to the couch for you to sit beside him.
"Sorry about being a pain earlier; you caught me at a really, really bad time."
"It's okay, Tink, you're here with me now; that's all that matters." Eddie let the towel around your head fall back so he could see your natural hair. "You wanna tell me what happened? I've never seen you so upset."
"You shook your head no, "It's too embarrassing."
"Come on, it's me we are talking about here."
You paused for a deep breath and decided to just lay it all out on the table... how much worse could it get, right?
“You remember Jesse, right?” Eddie could feel his fist tightening, but he said nothing while nodding his head with a tight lip. What the fuck did he do to you? “Well, he asked me to be his girlfriends no less than a week ago, and I was supposed to spend the night at his place… but I went over early and found him in bed with… someone.” Eddie went to say something but realized you weren’t finished and let you continue.
“Pathetic, isn’t it?! I finally get a boyfriend, and the moment I want to actually sleep with someone who isn’t you, they are in the arms of someone else! Am I really that undesirable?! I was practically throwing myself at him, and it turns out he was fucking his “friend” the whole time.”
You had missed your slip-up, but Eddie hadn't. Eddie didn’t hear anything after “I want to sleep with someone who isn’t you,”
So Adam was right…
“Eddie? Eddddiiieee?” You snapped your fingers in front of his face to try and get back his attention.
Great, so now you’re undesirable AND boring.
“Sorry what?”
“Forget it… you don’t wanna hear about my pitty party. I’ll call a cab and head back to… oh shit, I can’t even go home!”
“Stay here.”
“Eddie, I couldn’t possibly-”
“Yes. Stay. Take my bed; I’ll take the couch.”
“Eddie, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why not, Tink?” He brushed a fallen piece of hair behind your ear, and those pesky butterflies erupted within your core.
“Because…” because I’m in love with you and don’t know if I can hold back my feelings any longer.
“Exactly, you can’t come up with one. Let me take care of you.” Eddie’s voice dropped an octave.
A chill travelled down your spine. His touch is electric. Any time you’re with Eddie, your body feels like it’s been recharged.
As you gaze into Eddie’s eyes, this undeniable magnetic pull connects you. Was he leaning in? Or were you? Maybe it was the both of you? There was little to no space between you. Never in a million years did you think you would be sitting here, alone with Eddie in his apartment.
“I should get cleaned up,” Eddie whispered. He was so close you could taste the spearmint Nicorette gum he had been chewing. It took everything in his power to pull away. He wanted to kiss you so very badly, but he got a whiff of himself, and he needed to wash up. I would be unfair to you.
“Oh, okay,” you breathed in, and Eddie slid back.
“You can make yourself at home, okay? Help yourself to anything in the kitchen. I’ll be 10 minutes.”
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Eddie was freaking out in the shower, and you were freaking out in the kitchen. While Eddie scrubbed his skin so hard he thought he would scrub it off completely, you went to the fridge to find anything to help calm your nerves.
There wasn’t anything in the fridge, but the freezer, on the other hand... Bingo. You poured yourself a shot of vodka and almost threw up, but you held it together with a chaser of orange juice. You took one more for good measure and then made your way back to the couch. As you waited for your liquid courage to kick in, you flicked around on the TV but didn’t really pay much attention. Your thoughts were swimming with questions and possible scenarios that could play out this evening.
You were taken away from your inner thoughts when Eddie exited the bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. You tried not to make it obvious, but the alcohol clouded your awareness of your face.
“Sorry, I left my clothes in the bedroom” he saw you eye fucking him and gave a little smirk.
“It’s okay. Totally okay.” you sighed.
The sight of his wet, bare torso makes your heart race, his flesh covered in goosebumps, his nipples perked, and his hair soaked yet still so sexy. Your stomach simultaneously flip-flopped. And as for your pussy… well, she got a little excited at the heavenly sight in front of you.
“Yeah,” You wanna see more, Tink? Eddie thought to himself.
“Yeah.” You sighed before he disappeared into his bedroom.
Minutes later, Eddie returned, and the two of you acted as if nothing happened. Neither of you willing to break the tension first. So you both sat silently, watching some random TV movie while you prayed to come up with something to discuss. You wanted to talk so badly with him.
“This couch is pretty lumpy; it wouldn’t be fair to make you sleep on it.” You felt terrible that he offered his bed. “I’ll take the couch.”
“Nope. No way.” Eddie shook his head.
“Eddie.” You huffed.
“Tink,” he mocked back.
“You need a good sleep! You work a strenuous job…And my back can take it.”
I bet your back could take it, Eddie thought.
“You calling me old, sweetheart?”
Sweetheart, your stomach did a flip-flop again.
“No.” You snicker at his accusation.
“I don’t think I believe you” Eddie’s tone dropped again.
“Well, I’m not letting up”
“Neither am I; you’re sleeping in my bed whether I’m on it or not.
“Oh...”
“Yeah, oh.” Eddie sat back and the both of you finished the movie in silence.
You didn’t know when you fell asleep, but Eddie shook your shoulder awake.
“Come on Tinkerbell we are going to bed.” You think you hear Eddie whisper.
Were you dreaming? Did Eddie just tell you the two of you were going to bed?
“Mmm?”
“I’m not letting you sleep on the couch, remember? Don’t think you’re getting out of this so easily.”
“Okay, Eddie, “ you agreed in your sleepy haze.
You feel his arm wrap under yours as he helps you off the couch.
“There you go.” Eddie coos as he places you down gently.
The moment your head hits the pillow, you’re suddenly wide awake. You’re in Eddie’s bed. Eddie is getting in next to you.
“Figured we would compromise.” He slid next to you but over the covers with a throw blanket.
“Thanks for letting me stay… and giving me a shoulder to cry on.” You cringed with embarrassment at the last part.
“Thanks for letting me stay… and giving me a shoulder to cry on.” You cringed with embarrassment at the last part. “You seem to always be there for me…” you turn to your side to face Eddie.
“I’ll always be there for you, Tink, whether you like it or not…” Eddie also turns so he is facing you.
“Eddie.” Your breath hitched.
“Yes Tink.”
Fuck are you really going to spill your guts to him here and now?
“I… I wanna-need to tell you something.” You close your eyes, not daring to look at him.
“I think I might have an idea.”
“You-what?” Eyes still closed
You feel the bed shift and feel Eddie's warm breath fan your lips.
“Do you trust me?” Eddie whispered.
You aren’t brave enough to speak. So you tentatively nod your head yes.
“Do you trust me, Tink? I need you to say it.” He asked once more.
You slowly opened your eyes and bravely opened your mouth. “Yes, Ed’s, I trust you.”
A slight smile graces Eddie’s before you watch him lean in with a pucker.
Your heart skipped a beat the moment his lips touched yours.
Holy shit.
Eddie Munson was kissing you. Eddie Munson, your older brother's best friend, who you’ve been in love with for seven years, is now kissing you… in his bed… late at night… with no one else around. It was like fireworks were going off. It was everything you ever wanted and more.
It was all you had ever dreamed of, and now he was blowing your expectations out of the water. You had to have more. You needed this to last forever.
Your hands moved up to cup his face. His cheeks were rough with stubble, contrasting his soft plush lips. Eddie shifted closer to you. You could feel his body through the thick blankets that separated the two of you, but you wanted to be closer to him. You threw the blankets and all caution to the wind when you shifted to wrap your legs around him.
Eddie rolled so he was on top of you. To your surprise, you felt his firm cock pressed to your thigh, which made you moan softly.
“Fucking hell, Tink”
“Eddie, please, I need you.”
“Didn’t take you long to beg,” he chuckled darkly.
“Well, it took you long enough to see me.”
Eddie gazed into your eyes like he was looking at you for the first time. Like really seeing you. He muttered your name, your real name, for the first time, and you couldn’t fight the smile that spread across your face before you strained your neck to take his lips once more.
Eddie’s strong hands grazed your waist and settled on your hips, pinning you down to the mattress. His weight is entirely on you now. Your knees hitched up, and you opened your hips more to give him more room.
“Eddie,” you gasped into his mouth. Eddie ground his hips into yours, and you let out another soft moan.
“Tell me what you want.”
“You, it’s always been you.” You confessed.
Eddie didn’t say anything in reply but instead worked his fingers to the waistband of his sweatpants that you dawned.
“This okay?”
“Oh my god, yes,” you rushed. You’ve waited too long for this moment.
“Eager, aren’t we?”
“Don’t be mean,” You shove the pants off your ankles and go for your shirt.
“Wait… let me.” Eddie sat up so you could as well. His hands brushed the hem and slowly pulled the shirt he let you borrow off of you.
He took in your naked frame in front of him.
Shit, you weren’t wearing your panties this whole time? They must have been soaked as well from the rain. Eddie thought.
Eddie saw you shy away as you sat there naked in front of the boy you loved as he took you all in.
It didn’t take long before Eddie’s hands roamed your skin, finding your breasts.
“You’re so soft.” Eddie moaned into your neck as he took in the fact that you now smelled like him. He sent all over you; he was feral. He needed to claim you as his own. How could he be so blind all these years? You were perfect; you were everything he ever wanted.
“Do you like soft?”
“Very much so.”
Eddie melted into you once more as he travelled down your body, kissing and nipping at every inch. You softly moaned when he flicked your nipples with his tongue, and you really moaned when he reached your wet pussy.
How Eddie loved the noises he was pulling from you. He would do anything to make you sing for him.
“You like that baby? You want me to touch you… here?” His index finger grazed your wet slit.
“Yes” you replied quickly, a little too quickly.
“Good, I don’t know what I would have done if you said no.”
You giggled, but it was cut off by the feeling of Eddie’s fingertips grazing your clit.
You’d daydreamed countless times about how his fingers would feel while you watched him while he and your brother jammed in your garage.
He circled your clit before dipping his head down to kiss your lower lips. Reality hit you once again. Eddie was eating you out. Eddie was eating you out like a man starved, in fact. How was he so good at this? Scratch that you didn’t want to know. Your thoughts slowed down as Eddie’s thick fingers entered your wet hole.
“Eddie!” You yelled with pleasure.
“Oh yes, sweetheart, say my name.”
“Eddie, Eddie, Eddie,” you replayed like a mantra.
As his fingers grazed that spot that only you managed to find when you were alone in your bed, exploring your body. You fell apart in his hands.
“Your pussy grips me so good, god I can’t wait to fuck you.”
“Please, Eddie,” you begged in your blissed-out daze.
“Let me hear it again,” he smirked.
“I need you, please. I want your cock so badly."
“Mmmmmm, as you wish.” he pulled back so he could strip. You watched as his tight muscles flexed as he pulled off his shirt, then scrunched as he bent over to take off his bottoms.
His cock sprung out of their confines, and your breath hitched for what you thought was at least the fourth time that night.
You’ve imagined what it would look like, but none of the times ever did you imagine he was this hung. No wonder he was so confident and cocky around women. It was long, thick, and straight. No curvatures, just pure rod.
“I don’t think that’s going to fit,” you blurt out, not thinking.
“Don’t worry, Baby. It’ll fit.” he slunk back down on you, peppering your lips with more sensual kisses. His fingers travelled down to your pussy, stretching you out again, only this time, he used 3 fingers to make sure you were nice and ready.
“Please, I’m ready” You ground your pussy into Eddie’s hand.
Eddie reached over into his drawer, pulled out a condom, and slipped it over his shaft as quickly as possible. Seemed that he was just as eager as you.
Eddie kissed you hard as his cock slipped past your wet folds and inside, splitting you open. The wonderful burn of his cock burying itself inside of you. What could you say? It had been a while, and Eddie was the biggest you’ve ever had.
“Slowly,” you guided Eddie as he rocked his hips, giving you time to adjust.
“God, you’re so tight”
“Mmmphmm”
“Your noises are so pretty.” Eddie tucked a piece of fallen hair behind your ear.
Eddie took your breath away as he looked into your eyes. He was being so soft and gentle with you as if you could break.
“Eddie, please.”
“I got you, Princess”
Eddie rocked his hips with more emphasis; his body was moulding into yours. As his cock grazed your tight walls, you felt your body was brought to life.
“Oh fuck” your words slipped, not even realizing you were speaking.
“Come’on baby, let me hear you”
“You’re making me feel so good, Eddie!”
“More, tell me who you belong to.”
“ You! always been you, Eddie, please, I wanna come. Please make me cum on your cock.”
“Good girl. You’re being so good, f’me” Eddie's hips slapped into the backs of your thighs, and he plummeted into you, making you cry out in pleasure.
Eddie grabbed the backs of your knees and pushed them back to your shoulders, only making the angle more delicious as he fucked you. He watched as his cock disappeared into your wanton pussy. He watched as you clenched down on his cock, and he almost lost it as he tried not to cum right then and there.
“Fuck me, Tink! Your pussy is too good,” he gritted through his teeth, trying to keep the pace without blowing his load.
“Eddie!” Your body was on fire as his cock continuously hit your g spot. Your lower belly tingled as the feeling of your orgasm built up again.
“You close, baby?”
“Yes”
“Cum for me.”
“More, I need more.”
Eddie slipped his hand between you and gently circled your clit once again.
You moan, cockdrunk as your body begins to spasm around Eddie’s cock.
“Yes, that’s it, come on baby. Keep cuming. That’s my girl.”
Your eyes roll back into your head, and you clamp your jaw. Every muscle tightens and clenches as your second orgasm rips through you.
“Good girl. Good fuckin girl.” Eddie praises as he empties himself into the condom.
After a few moments of the two of you catching your breath and Eddie discarding the used condom, you break the silence.
“I can’t believe we just did that,” you chuckled in disbelief.
“Adam is going to kill me,” Eddie laughed.
“Good, I’ve been meaning to get him back. You roll over to snuggle in his arms.
“And to think you were supposed to be in another man’s bed tonight.” Eddie hated that idea.
“At least I ended up in the right man’s bed.”
Tagging those who seemed interested: @lofaewrites @lavendermunson @imyourdaninow @itsfreakingbats @allthingsjoeq
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loveshotzz · 2 months
Text
I guess it’s never really over
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mechanic!steve harrington x fem!reader exes to lovers
chapter one -
Late arrivals and big asks
A broken down car, a party at Reefer Rick’s, and a bandaid that needs to be ripped off.
warnings: 18+ drinking, smoking, lots of tension, some king!steve angst in the form of a flashback.
wc: 10.1k
series masterlist | series playlist
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June - 
The air is sticky, thick with the kind of humidity only Indiana could have at 9:30 pm. An annoyed breath expands into your lungs as you lean against your car that refuses to do anything but sputter. Despite your irritation, your glossed lips twitch with the nostalgia that creeps into your heart because after all these years it still smells the same.
Crossing your arms, your eyes trail over the clear night sky not polluted with the kind of man-made smog that blankets the city and the stars shimmer like diamonds in its absence. The warmth of the overrun engine is still hot on your exposed calves, the light breeze making the bottom of your sundress dance across the tops of your thighs. White beams emerge, cutting through the dark at the top of the hill, followed by the roar only a tow truck can make, and this time, the smile you fought off before spreads wide across your face.
Robin.
Butterflies wake up in a frenzy deep in your gut, with nerves that twitch from your fingertips at the thought of finally getting to hug your best friend after months apart. You push off the side of your car as the truck approaches, eyes squinting to make out the second outline in the front cabin as it pulls over. You recognize the messy mane of hair that could only belong to Eddie Munson in the driver seat almost instantly and his dimple filled smile brings you back to memories you thought you’d long forgotten. 
“Well, well, well, would you look at what the cat dragged in!” Robin sticks her head out of the window with a wide grin as the big tires slow to a stop in front of your car, “are my eyes deceiving me or is my best friend in the entire world actually in Hawkins, Indiana right now?” 
The rasp in her voice sounds just like it does over the phone and despite the roll of your eyes, your cheeks hurt from how happy you are.
“Shut up, don’t act like you didn’t guilt me out here by saying the fate of your future depends on it.” Uncrossing your arms, you open them wide, “I made the ultimate sacrifice for you, so are you gonna hug me or not?”
Dramatic? Yes. But it works like a charm when she flings open the passenger door and charges at you in a mess of honey blond waves and freckles, almost tackling you with the force of her impact wrapping her arms around you.
Too distracted by Robin, you almost don’t notice the creak of the driver's side door or the filled out frame of the man that used to be a lanky teenage boy walking past as Eddie starts to attach your car to his truck. He’s taller than you remembered even bending down, and despite the navy blue coveralls, you can still see that his pale skin is littered with even more tattoos.
“I can’t believe my guilt trip worked!” Robin beams, finally letting you go, her whole body practically vibrating with excitement as she claps her ring clad hands together.
“I really can’t believe it either,” you laugh nervously, the reality of what it means to come back starting to set in after seeing just one familiar face, but this isn’t high school anymore and you’re definitely not the same person you were five years ago either.
“Thanks so much, Eddie,” you break the ice when he stands back up, and the sound of your voice has his big brown eyes warmed with gold light up just like his face when he turns his full attention onto you. Scruff filled dimples poking even bigger holes in his cheeks.
“It’s my pleasure, sweetheart, I almost didn’t believe Robin when she called me. I thought it was a prank.” He beckons you over with open arms, “now that I know it’s not, you have exactly 10 seconds to get over here and hug me before I change my mind.”
There’s zero hesitation about giving into his ‘demand’ and when your arms wrap around his waist, you’re brought back to afternoons in the woods behind the school with heavy lidded eyes and lopsided grins. 
“Your own auto shop, huh?” You smile up at him, pulling away, “Eddie Munson, the business owner.”
He rolls his eyes but the pink tint that colors in his cheeks tells you he appreciates the praise.
“Yeah, something like that.” He chuckles, “Got a soft spot for that old man in the trailer park, couldn’t bring myself to leave.”
Your heart warms at the fondness that drips from his ton. 
“Okay, as sweet as this little reunion is. You’re late, and we have a party to get to.” Robin interrupts snatching your keys out of your hand, dropping them in Eddie’s.
“A party?” You snap confused, and Eddie takes that as his queue to walk away with a knowing smirk.
“Yes, this is the summer of fun and reckless abandon, this is the last summer of our youth before we have to be adults. Do you understand me?” Her fingers are digging into your shoulders by the end of her rant, with the kind of look in her eyes that you’re absolutely going to have to revisit after a few weeks. 
“This is the part where I remind you that I graduated college last year.” 
Your best friend scoffs at you.
“Just humor me, okay? It’s your grand homecoming.” She pushes out her bottom lip, and makes her eyes big in a way she knows you can’t say no to.
“Fine.” You huff, making her finally let you go with the kind of pleased smirk that tells you she never thought she was going to lose to begin with.
“Great, it’s time to rip the bandaid off anyway.” Robin practically mumbles the last part turning on her heel to head back to the truck.
It takes a minute for her words to stick to your ears and their meaning to ring loud through your head, but when they do it feels like the air is stolen from your lungs. 
“Rip what bandaid off, Robin?!” 
It’s his name tightens in your chest but you refuse to say it, even after all this time it burns coming back up. 
“Since you had to drive for so long, I’ll sit in the middle because I’m just that good of a friend, you know?” She winks with a shit eating grin before pulling herself up and disappearing inside the cab of the truck, ignoring your question, like she’s not asking you to do the one thing you said you’d never do. 
See Steve Harrington again.
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I tell myself, ‘draw the line.’
You wonder if Robin can feel the daggers you’re glaring into the back of her head as the two of you walk up the driveway to Rick’s house. Gravel crunching hard under your converse as you keep up with her black combat boots. She looks effortlessly cool in her high waisted jean shorts, and her oversized army green jacket covered in patches. You’d compliment her if you weren’t so mad.
“I can’t believe you guys still have parties here.” You scoff, making your sour attitude known, but your best friend ignores it with ease.
“I can’t believe you forgot to have fun. Don’t you live in the city?” Turning around with a smirk, she can’t help but laugh at the look on your face. 
She stops abruptly, almost making you run into her leaving you both just close enough to the party to hear the bass of the music spilling through the cracks in the windows. The low chatter of people echoes through the trees that surround you and bounce off the lake not that far away. The thought of hearing the calm baritone of his voice mixed in makes your chest tight with the kind of nerves that dare you to high tail it and run.
“It’s been five years.” Robin’s playful demeanor breaks and becomes pleading with a kind of desperation you’ve never seen from her before. “He’s not the person you knew in high school, I need you to understand that. You think I’d call someone like that my best friend?”
“Hey!-“ You object at the title, and it makes her lips twitch despite serious lines that crease her face.
“Stop, you know what I mean,” her painted fingers grab onto yours, squeezing them lightly, “please, just give him a chance. I’m not asking you to get back together or even be friends, just get along enough not to kill each other this summer. I can’t choose between you. I won’t.”
The genuine love she has for Steve is apparent in the way her ocean blue eyes threaten to drown you in their sincerity, and you can’t find it in yourself to say no to her. 
“Fine.” You accept your defeat in practically a whisper, but it makes your best friend squeal nonetheless. The giddiness from before coming back tenfold as she links arms with you, continuing your way up to the house. 
It’s just a summer, right?
The crowd gets bigger as more people start to come into view, between groups smoking cigarettes outside, couples arguing by cars, others making out against them. The smell of beer gets more pungent with each step, the atmosphere a stark contrast to the way the moon glows against the peaceful waters behind the madness of the house. 
Salt N Pepa’s ‘Push It’ plays loud enough for you to make out the words when you reach the front steps, walking through clouds of tobacco smoke to get to the unlocked door. The interior hasn’t changed at all since high school, the smell of stale lime and tequila stinging your nose. The bass of the music vibrates under your shoes as Robin unlinks her arms and you have to fight the urge to yank her back.
“Drinks or …Steve first?” She asks, her nerves about the situation finally showing themselves as she bites at her thumbnail. 
“Absolutely drinks! Is that a trick question?” You half whisper, half yell, looking around as if saying his name out loud might summon him.
“Okay! Okay!” Robin hisses, grabbing your wrist, leading you towards the familiar path to Rick’s kitchen.
Suddenly you wonder what your makeup looks like after a long day of traveling in your car, your fingers tugging at the bottom of your dress before adjusting the front of it so it sits just right. You itch to grab your lip gloss that’s tucked into the side of your bra, but you don’t want to deal with the look you’d get if you went for it.
Rounding the corner to the living room, your heart sinks to the bottom of your stomach before you even have a chance to stop it when your eyes meet that messy head of chestnut hair, and a pair of hot pink nails tangled inside it. 
“Oh - I - god dammit.” Robin groans, when you're met with number two on your list, making out with a pretty blond on the couch.
Despite the years and distance, there’s still a sting that you feel in the corners of your eyes. It’s not enough for any tears to fall, there’s none left for him anymore, but it’s enough for the anger you’ve clung to since the day he broke your heart to boil hot under your skin. It singes the wings of the butterflies that try to take flight when you see the way his frame has filled out, how he’s somehow grown more handsome than the last time you saw him. 
Robin coughs, squeezing your wrist in reassurance.
“Hey, - uh, Steve.” The sound of his name catches his attention, long brown lashes fluttering open to reveal the deep coffee of his eyes that widen when they lock with yours for the first time in years. 
His lips pull from the blond’s with a loud smack, leaving a small trail of glitter on the side of his mouth that he tries to wipe away quickly with his wrist. Black ink you’ve never seen before looks bold on his tanned skin that glows like it’s been freshly kissed by the sun. 
His gaze wanders up and down your body like he’s unsure you’re actually real, and if it wasn’t for the obvious shock of your arrival and the way the color seems to drain from his face, you’d snap at him for the way it lingers over your curves. 
“Um, Robin, what the fuck?” The sound of his voice makes your heart skip a beat, and again when his hand drags through his hair just how you remembered.
“Surprise?” She shrugs, wincing when he scoffs loudly and the warmth that went missing floods his cheeks, turning them bright red. The blond next to him eyes you up while she clutches harder to his waist, and you can’t stop the rise of your brows and the giggle that bubbles past your lips because of it.
Steve’s head snaps towards you, something softening the moss that hides in his eyes when he hears the noise despite the sarcasm that drips from it, and you really get to look at him for the first time since high school graduation. 
God, you wish you could’ve had that drink. 
The jawline that always drove you mad is sharper, peppered with the kind of hardly there stubble that tells you he’s only missed one shaving day. A problem he never used to have, and somehow, it makes him all that much more attractive. 
His hair is a little messier than his carefully crafted look that used to take him a good forty five minutes every morning. It curls wildly at the ends now, tucking behind his ears and fanning along the nape of his freckled neck. It still looks as soft as you remember, though. 
His shoulders are broader, stretching the white cotton of his shirt tight enough across his chest that you can see the outline of a thick patch of hair that had only just started growing when you knew him last. The dark wash of his jeans makes them look almost black, fitting snug over his thighs, cuffed at the bottoms framing the tops of his boots.
Why couldn’t Steve Harrington just peak in high school like he was supposed to?
“So yeah, this is awkward.” Your best friend laughs nervously, “We’re going to get a drink or three because this scenario is by far the worst case and not the way this was supposed to go in my head, but anyway, look who’s here for the summer! We’ll talk later!“ 
Robin grabs your wrist before Steve can respond, pulling you back into the party and away from your ex-boyfriend while the realization of the summer you’ve foolishly agreed to hits you all at once. It turns your body weightless as the two of you weave in and out of the crowd. It tightens in your chest, the music turning muffled hitting your ear drums. Suddenly, you're not the woman who crossed state lines to the one place she said she’d never come back to, happily living the lie that you’d actually forgotten about him to be a good friend.
You’re the girl who let him keep you a secret, and you hate him for it.
Sneakers hit the sticky tile floor that hasn’t changed since 1984, the harsh lighting of the kitchen makes you both squint. It’s calmer than the rest of the house, just a few groups lingering off in the corners, too deep in conversation to care about you and Robin. Letting go of a breath you didn’t know you were holding, your ears start to pop too, Eddie Money’s Take Me Home Tonight coming through crystal clear.
“The band-aid might have been violently ripped off, but hey, it’s ripped off nonetheless.” Robin shrugs, finding the half-drunk bottle of tequila on the counter. “I think we should count this as a win and take a shot to celebrate.”
“A win?! Are you kidding me?!” You hiss, completely bewildered.
“Yes a win - oh no.” Her blue eyes go wide at whatever’s behind you, but it doesn’t take you long to figure out when that familiar spice and cedar of his cologne hits your nose.
“Right so, who’s going to let me know what’s going on?”
His voice comes out close enough to send your lashes fluttering, mimicking your heart. The nerves you’d just gotten over threaten to come back tenfold, but you manage to swallow them down just like in high school, turning around.
“I think it’s obvious what’s going on, Steve,”
It’s not as hard to say his name as you thought it would be, but it is hard to stare at his face from this close. Specifically, the two moles that dot his cheek that you always used to kiss, or the ones on his neck that you hate still taunt you for more. 
“I’m here for the summer.”
Steve Harrington had thought about this moment a lot, but Rick’s house was never the backdrop for it. His eyes take in the features you’ve not only grown into but somehow are even more beautiful than he remembers. Even if they’re twisted in a glare. 
“I meant, why didn’t I know until right now?” He manages to get out with a shake of his head narrowing his eyes at Robin, who’s too busy trying to find clean shot glasses to notice.
“Why would you need to know?” You snap, making a nervous hand card through his hair
“Cause I’ve, uh,  you know, I’ve asked about you a few times,” the last part comes out a little harsher, clearly directed at your best friend, who you know is actively ignoring you both now.
“Why? Why would you need to know anything about me?” Your hostility still shocks him even though he was expecting it. His eyebrows shoot up just like his hands in surrender. “Why didn’t you tell me, Robin?”
She groans loudly, slamming the tequila bottle down on the counter before turning around.
“You said you didn’t want to hear anything about him after you moved, why would I tell you he was asking about you?”
“Wait -“ Steve butts in this time, “seriously?”
“Oh my god, can you two shut the fuck up for a second and take these shots? You’re really putting a damper on the beginning of the best summer of our lives,” Robin snaps before waving a hand in front of three freshly poured shots.
It’s a struggle to tear your eyes from him, your body responding to his presence in a way that feels like it’s turning against you. It has you downing your shot in one quick motion before anyone else can even touch theirs. 
“Wow, okay.” Robin deadpans before shaking her head, wasting no time in following your lead.
“So we’re not cheersing anymore? Isn’t that bad luck?” Steve mutters, shoulder brushing against yours as he leans forward to grab his shot, the slightest touch enough to engulf your skin into flames.
A whole summer? Fuck.
“Robin, pour another one.” You rush with pinched brows as you try to move past the bitter sting of the alcohol going down your throat, taking a step toward her and away from him, you add “and we’ll cheers.”
You refuse to meet his gaze when you say it, but you can feel the intensity of it on the side of your face, begging you to break.
“Rob’s, how are you guys getting home?” Steve finally breaks, giving up his quiet fight for now, and you hate the way his nickname for her softens your heart.
“Huh, that’s a good question, I hadn’t thought that far yet.” She admits, over pouring so tequila splashes against the countertop, looking up at him with a mischievous grin.
“Seriously–
“RECKLESS ABANDON STEVEY!” Cutting him off, she downs her shot in his disapproving face.
“You didn’t cheers again.” Steve sighs, hands finding his hips as you whine an irritated, “We needed to cheers!” At the same time.
Your eyes meet his finally, his knowing smirk twisting the corners of your lips despite yourself. You blame the tequila starting to warm the blood in your veins.
“Well, you need to take yours then if we’re doing another one ‘the proper’ way, or it’s not going to be even.” Robin points at your drink in a silent challenge. 
You know how this game works.
“Fine.” You shrug, downing it with more ease than the last one.
“Oh my god. Stop! Do not pour another one before you answer my question, please!” Steve sounds exasperated, grabbing the bottle from her before she can disobey, “How are you getting home?” 
You try not to focus on how much larger his already big hands are now, or how small the bottle looks wrapped up in his palm compared to your best friends. The second shot takes the edge off your nerves in a way that your shoulders relax. Leaning against the counter, you cross your arms, watching the two of them bicker, catching Steve’s wandering gaze on your exposed legs while he tries his best to keep his focus on Robin. It boosts your ego in a way that has the anger hiding just under the surface go from a boil to a slow simmer.
“I don’t know Harrington, do you know anybody with a car?” She wiggles two thick brows at him, the second shot making her blue eyes glassy, and her smile a little more goofy.
“Why’d I know you were going to say that? And why did I know you were going to do this?” Steve sighs, letting her snatch the bottle out of his hand.
“What? Bring her to the party?” Robin snorts pointing a thumb in your direction, making you gasp.
“Robin!”
“No! What? No. But don’t think,” Steve clears his throat looking at you awkwardly before finishing a little quieter, “don’t think we’re not going to talk about this later.”
“I can still hear you.” You remind him with a sarcastic smirk.
“Yeah, I know you can. Look, I’ll DD for you because obviously tonight is, uhh,” he gestures to you with cheeks that grow pinker by the second, “a big deal. But you gotta stop doing this to me, I need you to get your license you’re out of colleg-”
“Shots! Steve’s driving us home!” Robin whoops loudly, and an irritated Steve pinches the bridge of his nose before walking away. 
Your eyes follow him out the door, shoulder blades flexing under cotton when he runs another hand through his hair before disappearing from sight. You try to push down the small pang of jealousy that makes a familiar home inside your chest remembering the blond girl waiting for him on the couch.
“Okay, okay,” Robin interrupts your inner struggle at the perfect time, sliding an overflowing shot over to you with a giggle that's contagious and it banishes Steve from your mind just like magic. “I’m not going to forget this time, promise.”
“I don’t think I can afford for you to forget again,” you smirk, raising your glass, tequila spilling over the tops of your fingers, “cheers!”
“Cheers!” 
You both down them at the same speed, slamming the empty glasses back onto the countertop with laughter that bounces off the walls and threatens to drown out the music. And for a second you think maybe you can actually do this.
“I’m so happy you’re here!” She squeals, throwing her arms around your neck, doing a terrible job of holding her weight up. Grabbing onto her waist, you do your best to steady her, “Look I just want to say while he’s gone, I know this isn’t easy for you, okay? I know.”
She hiccups before pulling away slightly to look at you as she finishes,“But It means so much to me, and I just wanna say I’m proud of you. I mean, who knows, you’ve changed, he’s changed-”
“Nope, no, you’re done. Where’s the weed? I wanna smoke some weed.” You push Robin away, rolling your eyes at the loud laugh your reaction gets from her.
There’s a long summer ahead of you, but right now, all you need is to find a joint and try not to think about your ex in the next room.
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With a few more shots and a couple of hits from a blunt you and Robin you’d stumbled upon being passed amongst a group outside, you start to really feel like you’re back home. Nostalgia hits you hard in the gut as you walk through the crowded living room hand in hand with your best friend, giggling and stumbling back to the kitchen on the hunt for some food. 
“God, I’m so hungry!” Robin practically growls when you hit the harsh lighting again making you both hiss.
An empty bottle of tequila sits on the counter now and red solo cups litter the floor that weren’t there before, and a growing pile of bitten into limes cover the counters in a sticky mess. Alone and left to your own devices Robin begins to raid the cupboards, huffing when she finds nothing behind every door she aggressively yanks open.
“Why is his kitchen always so empty? Like? Do we just always miss the party?” You hiccup, tripping on a tile that’s coming out of the grout. 
You catch yourself on the kitchen island in front of you, a loud laugh bubbling up from your chest, too drunk to focus on how gross the formica feels under your fingertips.
“There’s literally nothing to eat in here, not even like an old bag of stale chips.” She opens the first cabinet one last time before slamming it shut, officially giving up with a thump of her forehead against the wood. “This is why he’s always at the diner.”
“Wait, Rick actually lives here still?” Another hiccup, you foolishly lean your elbows on the counter, something you’ll regret in the morning as you stare at your best friend with a toothy smile, completely unaffected by the news about the missing food that seems to be ruining her entire mood.
“How can he sell weed and not have any food in his house? What happens when he gets the munchies?!” She throws her hands up, ignoring your question and answering it all at the same time. “I’m gonna find a bathroom, and then we’re gonna find Steve - don’t make that face, he’ll take us through a drive-thru.”
“Don’t be gone long, I don’t know anyone here!” You whine with a childish drunk stomp of your foot, still sporting that sour look she told you to wipe off. The carefree girl from moments before now gone in the blink of an eye.
“Literally like five minutes, I swear!” She promises, turning around with a smirk as she crosses her heart with a ring covered finger like you used to do as kids, easily earning the smile from you she was hoping for.
You watch her disappear into the party, staring after bouncing honey waves until they’re out of your sight. 
Suddenly alone for the first time in hours, the kitchen feels quiet. The bass of the music is distant, and your thoughts are heavy just like your feet as your last shot of tequila settles with the rest. Your brain wanders to places that you thought you’d banished from the corners of your mind for years. It takes you to the pink fullness of his lips, and has you biting the bottom of yours. Then it’s the freckles that dot the bridge of his nose and explode across his cheeks, even leaving their mark on the bottom of his earlobe.
You’d found that one the night you’d tried to count them all. You never finished.
Then you remember the blond on the couch, and how her pink nails dug into the thick chestnut of his hair that you used to tug on when his kisses got to be too much. She turns into Nancy Wheeler and those stolen looks in the hallways at school, and suddenly, you hate him all over again.
“Jesus, you’re in here alone? Where’s Robin?” Steve’s voice makes you jump at the worst possible time, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scar-“
“Seriously?!” You snap, turning around with crossed arms. Leaning against the counter, you hope that you don’t seem as drunk as you are, but the way his lips twitch regardless of your attitude tells you that it’s not working. “She went to the bathroom and then was going to look for you.”
“So, it just makes sense for me to hang out here then, right?”Steve raises his hands in a silent plea for permission. 
His big boots take heavy steps towards you, and just like on cue, has your body betraying you. The plush dough of your thighs pressing harder together each time he gets closer to closing the gap. 
Cautiously taking the spot a few feet away from you, he keeps his hands up till he feels safe enough to shove them in his pockets. The spice of his cologne smells fresh, and you wonder if he sprayed it before walking in here. It overpowers everything else around you, invading your senses and committing itself to memory despite you.
“I um, I really hope this is okay to say,” he stammers watching the way one of your eyebrows arches up, and it doesn’t take long for his hand to escape from his pocket to run through his hair again, “but it’s, it’s good to see you. I m-missed you, Robin’s missed you.”
“Shouldn’t you be hanging out with your girlfriend?” You ignore him and tuck his words away to unpack another time with a sober mind.
“Cassie? She’s not my girlfriend.” He answers without any hesitation, something sparking alive inside the gold of his eyes that has one side of his mouth tugging up. 
“Does she know that?” 
“I’m pretty sure she does considering she left with another guy not that long ago.” He snorts, the confidence you’ve always known him to have finding its way back, and you don’t miss the way he scoots closer. 
So you scoot back.
“Sucks to suck, Harrington.” You sigh, impressed with how well you’re playing off the victory lap you’re shamefully running in your head at the new information.
“There you are!” Robin rushes in, face flushed and out of breath, interrupting the moment you weren’t ready to have yet at the perfect time “Somehow I got roped into like a keg stand and I think it’s really time for us to go home guys.”
“Robin!” 
“What?!”
She tries to shush you, but even you can see from across the room the way sweat starts to bead across her forehead, the blush in her cheeks going pale before she runs to the trash can. Steve pushes off the island without any hesitation, rushing to the other side of the kitchen, gathering her hair in his hands to hold it back.
“What were you thinking?” Steve scolds her in the softest way possible, rubbing her back as all the beer finds its way out of her body.  
Those big eyes of his that you’re sure are going to haunt your dreams meet yours, and in that moment the room decides it wants to spin. You’re not sure if it’s the night of tequila with nothing but a weed chaser catching up to you or if it’s the onslaught of feelings you’ve successfully suppressed for the last five years coming back to seek their revenge. The deadly combination of both comes to a head the more you watch the gentle way Steve handles Robin and it makes you realize it’s time to go.
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You manage to pull yourself together enough to help Steve get Robin in his car, heart almost stopping when you walk up to the same Maroon BMW he took your virginity in. It takes everything inside of you not to abort the mission, run to Robin’s apartment by figuring your way through the woods you used to play in, do anything but sit in those leather seats. But your best friend’s drunk rambles of how happy she is to have her ‘two amigos and how that it makes three now’ while professing her undying love for both of you has you putting on a brave face, and then your big girl pants when you have to sit in the front seat next to him.
It’s in perfect condition, just like the morning he pulled into the parking lot Junior year with it. Your stomach twists in the kind of knots that have you wrapping your arms around your waist. The smell of leather and pine pulling on the back of your throat, and all the memories that come with it. He keeps the radio low, and you can hardly make out the faint sounds of whatever late night talk show was on over the soft snores of a passed out Robin in the backseat. 
“I thought you’d have a different car by now.” You grumble sinking further into your seat, keeping your eyes trained on the trees that zoom past your window.
“You’ll have to pry her from my cold, dead hands, honey.” Steve chuckles, relaxing a little more into his own, a big hand finding a new resting spot on the stick shift.
The endearment sends you reeling, the tequila making it hard to bite your tongue.
“Don’t call me that.” Quickly realizing that staring out the window does nothing to help your already dicey equilibrium, you decide to finally look at him, but you’re not sure if that’s any better.
‘What? Honey?” He asks, fully knowing the answer but egging you on just the same with a ghost of a smirk on his lips.
Narrowing your eyes, you turn fully in your seat doing your best to ignore the way the street lights bounce off his sharp features as you face him.
“What? So you just make out with girls that you’re not dating and get away with it?” 
Steve snorts, licking his lips and meeting your angry gaze with an amused one. 
“I am twenty-four and single.”
Scoffing at his answer, you pause to collect your words that keep getting tangled on the tip of your tongue from too many drinks and how the whites of his teeth start to show in a grin as he glances in the rearview mirror to check on Robin.
“You think you can do whatever you want don’t you?”
“No -“
“What? Because you didn’t peak in high school like you were supposed to, you somehow just got hotter, you think the rules don’t apply to you or something?”
“Good to know you still think I’m hot.” Steve’s face cracks into a smile, turning into an apartment complex you’re assuming is Robin’s. 
“You’re the worst,” you try to deflect weakly, turning back in your seat with a huff.
“I definitely used to be,” he mumbles mostly to himself, putting the car in park, both of you jerking forward slightly. The sudden lack of movement makes Robin groan in the back, lashes fluttering open to look at her surroundings.
“Oh, thank god, I think I’m gonna be sick again.” Her throat sounds hoarse when she finally speaks, but it’s all she can manage before a dry heave has the boy next to you scrambling.
“Not in my car! Not in my car!” Steve’s quick to jump out of the driver's seat rushing to get your best friend out of the back, leaving you alone to fight with your seatbelt. 
Frustrated, you blow a breath out from between your pressed lips tugging on the smooth material while your thumb smashes the release button. It doesn’t budge and the cedar starts to pick at your nerves. An angry noise squeaks from the back of your throat catching Steve’s attention who finally gets Robin on her feet. The spice of his cologne swallows you whole when he emerges back into the car. Leaning over the console he’s gentle when he pushes your hand away. You don’t protest his help this time, eyes tracing the gold chain that slips out from under his shirt. It shimmers everytime it swings from his neck when it hits the moonlight, clicking the button with ease, releasing you from your self imposed trap.
“Thanks,” you grumble, using a wobbling arm to open your door, clambering out less gracefully than you intended.
“Are you good to follow me? I don’t think Robin’s gonna make it up the steps on her own.” Closing the car door, he leans over the top of it, his eyes watching the way you maneuver around his car like you’re walking on thin ice.
“I’m fine,” you growl, right as you lose your footing catching yourself with an open palm on the hood of his trunk.
“Seriously, I can help I just have to take you both one at a -“
“Steve, I said I’m fine. I don’t need anything from you.” You interrupt and if you weren’t so focused on putting one foot in front of the other, you’d see the way the harshness of your words make him wince.
He stares at you for a minute longer before muttering a quiet ‘whatever’ scooping Robin up and tucking her into his side. You follow them at your own pace up the cement steps to the second floor, thankful that her apartment isn’t too far from the landing when you get to the top. Your legs start to feel like Jell-O waiting for him to unlock the door, the long drive from New York and the night finally catching up to you in a way that makes your eyelids heavy as Steve pushes open her front door. 
“Bathroom! Bathroom!” Robin manages to get out when she and Steve cross the threshold first, a string of cuss words spilling out of his mouth as he tries to hurry her to the place she was begging to be taken to.
You use the full force of your weight with your back to the door, closing behind you with a loud slam. The navy blue couch in the middle of her living room begging you to sit down, an invitation your clumsy steps accept, leading you to the fluffy cushions. Collapsing onto them with a satisfied hum, you sink into the foam, lashes fluttering and eyelids getting heavier with each second that passes, and soon you find yourself giving in with a warm cheek pressed into the arm rest.
You don’t know how much time has passed when the feeling of your laces being tugged loose stirs you awake. Trying to focus with vision still blurry from sleep, Steve’s messy head of hair comes clear into your line of sight. Long fingers pull the white strings from the metal eyelets of your converse, a warm palm wrapping around your ankle that sends a shiver up your spine as he slowly wiggles your sneaker off your foot. The white tube socks that cover your feet make him smile with a thumb that dares to rub a small circle on your skin before dropping it to work on the other.
“Steve,” you manage to get out, voice still thick with sleep.
“I’m just tucking you in, that’s all hon- and then I’ll get out of your hair.” He clears his throat after the nickname that set you off earlier burns like acid dying on his tongue.
You grumble something unintelligible, rubbing the mascara off your eyes as he pulls your other shoe off the pad of his thumb doing the same thing to your other ankle making your toes curl. Both his hands find their way to your calves squeezing softly at the muscles before he starts to lift them up.
“Come on, let's get you laying on your side.” He coos, helping you adjust so you’re finally horizontal. You groan a little, reaching out for him on instinct, the softness of his touch making a very drunk you crave more. 
“I’d love to cuddle but I think you’d actually kill me in the morning,” he laughs to himself knowing you won’t remember any of this when you wake up.
You make some more noises that he can’t figure out if they're supposed to be words or not as he drapes Robin’s thick throw blanket over you. Grabbing the material in your fists when you feel it, you pull it even closer, a low satisfied hum spilling from between your lips that still sparkle with leftover glitter from your gloss. He watches the way you curl into yourself, fingers twitching at his side to run his knuckles over your cheek.
“Steve,” his name comes out clear as day, kicking up his heart rate.
“Yeah?” He squats down next to your face, the warmth of your breath hitting his face while your eyebrows furrow in your sleepy state trying to get whatever you want to say out.
“You really broke my heart, you know that?”
Your words punch the air out of his lungs, just like your unexpected arrival. Something he’s fantasized about happening more times than he’d like to admit.
“Yeah, I know.” He sighs defeated, giving into his urges for comfort with knuckles that brush against the warmth of your skin, a familiar burn stings his eyes when you subconsciously lean into it. 
You don’t say anything else to him, the furrow of your brows smoothing out as your face finally starts to relax under his touch. He watches the way your shoulders move with each deep breath that pulls you further into sleep and away from him. 
He takes a selfish minute to stare at you uninterrupted, tracing your cheekbone one last time before he stands up to leave, he knows he won’t get any sleep, and the words you won’t remember saying are already haunting him like a bad dream.
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“Do you really wanna love me like you say you do? Give it to me like you say you do? Cause it’s hard enough you gotta treat me like this, lonely enough to let you treat me like this. Do you really love me?”
Steve was late, glancing down at pink the digital watch on your wrist, fifteen minutes late. Five lockers down from his, you wait for him at what’s been your meeting spot for the last eight months. Far away enough from his locker that no one would suspect you waiting for the King of Hawkins himself, but close enough to the janitor's closet for him to steal you away from sight without anyone noticing for the forty-five minutes of study hall. 
Hushed argumentative whispers catch your attention, nerves making your feet move from side to side unsure if you should abandon ship and just go and study for the final in your last period. Nancy Wheeler's eyes meet yours as she rounds the corner with her best friend Barb, the corners of her lips pulling up ever so slightly giving you a small wave which you return as she tries to ignore her friend.
“He’s just trying to get in your pants! Come on, you have to be smart enough to know that.” Barb points at the note Nancy is clutching in her hand so hard that the whites of her knuckles show.
“It’s not like that, I’m just tutoring him.” She argues but the blush that creeps across her cheeks and spreads down her neck gives her away.
I’m just tutoring him.
That simple sentence is enough for your world to tip off its axis, chest tightening at the realization of who they're arguing about. All the canceled plans the past few weeks with the excuse of extra tutoring starts to feel like a knife to the gut. Prince Charming rounds the corner holding and twists the handle with a bright flirtatious smile that used to be just for you, only now it’s flashed at the dainty brunette who melts under it because no one is immune to Steve Harrington. 
It takes him a minute to see you, too wrapped up in Nancy who’s back is pressed to the lockers, caged in by Steve’s big hand splayed against the metal by her head. They’re too far to hear what he’s saying to her, but the confident way his teeth flash and the sweet giggle he earns from it tells you everything you need to know. Tears burn at the corners of your eyes, but you don’t want to give him the satisfaction of seeing them fall. Fists clenched at your sides, the blunt ends of your nails dig into your palms as you hold in the sob that threatens to give you away as you walk past them, meeting his guilty eyes before you round the corner.  
The pounding in your head wakes you up before the sun that leaks through Robin’s small kitchen window. Your hangover rings in your ears with a vengeance, and has you letting out a pained groan. Everything after the joint you shared outside at the party is nothing but a blur, a scattered puzzle with pieces missing as you try and figure out how you ended up back home and tucked into the couch. 
“Are you alive out there?” Robin’s voice calls out weakly from down the hall in her room. 
“Barely,” you grumble, agitation kicking in from dehydration and the old wounds your dream decided to rip open.
“I’d say I’m never drinking again but we both know that’s a lie,” she says, muffled by what sounds like a pillow.
A giggle tries to escape, but it only makes you wince, clutching your forehead willing the pain to subside.
“How’d we even get home?” You croak, rubbing harshly at your eyes before attempting to sit up, covering them with a cupped palm as your surroundings get brighter.
“Steve,” Robin’s voice comes out right next to you, surprising you by appearing in the entryway. 
Hearing his name out loud sends the kind of rage that scorches through your veins, it burns from your fingertips remembering the look on his face when you broke up a few weeks after that day in the hallway your dreams so sweetly reminded you of. 
It was Pity.
Your best friend ignores your silence and the sour look on your face as you silently take a trip down memory lane while she shuffles into the living room wandering to the attached kitchen. 
“How far is Eddie’s shop from here?” You grimace watching her chug from a carton of orange juice.
“Oh, super close. You can walk from here.” She answers, wiping her upper lip with the back of your hand, “they opened like two hours ago, I’m sure he’s already looked at your car.”
“I think I’m going to shower and go over, do you want to come with me?” Raising your hands above your head, you stretch your sore muscles as a yawn comes out in the middle of your question.
“I think I need to rot in bed for a little while longer before I go walk amongst the living, I promise I’m all yours after I don’t feel like a freaking crypt keeper.” Your yawn is contagious, giving you a view of all her perfectly straight teeth.
“I demand something greasy for lunch when I get back then.” You point at her finding your footing on the carpet, noticing your converse are tucked nice and neat against the couch next to you. The feeling of Steve’s knuckles is a ghost against your skin, details starting to come out clear from the murky waters. 
Heat rushes to your cheek at the memory while your emotions start to go at war with each other over what to feel towards the man who tucked you and your best friend in last night, but also broke your heart in a way you don’t think you’ll ever quite forget. 
“I’m on it boss, god, I wish Benny’s was still open.” Robin interrupts the inner struggle she’s oblivious to you having as she walks past you flinging herself on the couch you’d just won the battle of leaving “But I’ll think of something good, I promise.”
Just like your yawn, the smile she gives you is contagious despite the sharp pain you get in your head from moving too much and you both laugh wincing when it only gets worse. 
Ibuprofen first, then your car.
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Birds chirp loudly, mocking the headache that's turned into something more annoying than painful after a handful of ibuprofen. The sticky air is still suffocating even in a pair of black biker shorts and an oversized loose fitting tee, while the sun shines golden against the cerulean sky without a cloud in sight to hide you from its light. 
The heat warming off its rays makes beads of sweat start to collect at the crown of your head and the nape of your neck, while the incline Eddie’s spinning auto body sign sits on top of threatens to take your breath away. Unwanted thoughts of Steve Harrington keep your pace quick, stewing over the last twenty-four hours and everything it’s unraveled.
The small parking lot is empty when you reach it, kicking small rocks with the toe of your sneaker as you cross it. The double garage doors are open, Metallica’s Seek and Destroy echoing loudly, tugging up the corners of your lips. Your Chevrolet Caprice is the only car semi-lifted in the air with a pair navy coverall-clad legs underneath it.
Opening your mouth, Eddie’s name dies on your tongue before you get a chance to shout it, clocking him and his wild curls sitting in the glass office inside. Those big brown eyes meet yours from across the way, a dimple filled grin lighting up his face waving excitedly from his chair before standing up.
“Glad to see you’re alive, princess.” He teases stepping out of his glass case, with coveralls that are gray today.
“Honestly, it’s a miracle,” you laugh, confused eyes darting to the large boots under your car that don’t seem to have any reaction to the sound of your voice.
“Oh, I heard all about your first night back home. In fact my shop opened thirty minutes late because of it,” he chuckles, crossing his arms over his chest as he leans against the open metal frame where the door should be. Faded bats that you remember when they were fresh dancing across his arm with his movements.
“Wait, what?” You ask, confusion pinching your brows together right as the mysterious pair of legs start pushing out whoever’s under your car.
“I didn’t get back to my place till almost four in the morning after getting you two home and in bed,” Steve emerges flashing you his million dollar smile as he sits up on the dolly, the sleeves of his own coveralls tied tight around his waist and hair wild like he’d just rolled out of bed, “I slept through my alarm.”
The immediate glare that hardens your face when you see him has Eddie's eyes light with obvious amusement. 
“What are you doing here? And why are you touching my car?” You snap, trying to push the worries about what you look like deep under the irritation and the distraction that begs to steal your anger with his arms on full display like this. Or how the patch of chest hair that peeks out the top of it shines with sweat. 
“I work here,” Steve snorts like it’s the most obvious conclusion, because, well, it is, “and I volunteered to look at it, Eddie’s got his hands full.” 
That was a lie, he begged him.
“Since when do you know anything about cars?” Snorting, your attitude makes him roll his eyes, pushing himself off the ground.
It’s a struggle to hold his gaze when he stands at full height, biceps flexing with his movements practically daring you to look. He pulls out a faded maroon rag from his pocket and starts wiping off the fresh black from his hands that’s already stained under his nail beds. The hard bottoms of his work boots making their way across the cement floors of the garage. 
“There’s a lot you don’t know about me anymore, that’s what happens when someone leaves for five years.” Steve antagonizes, his lack of sleep leaving him with thin patience.
He stops just close enough for you to smell how the woodsy spice of his cologne mixes with the sweet bitterness of the oil that seems to find a way to leave its mark on every surface in here. Including him.
“I’m going to finish balancing the books, why don’t you tell her the good news first and then the bad,” Eddie pours ice over the tension that threatens to boil over before it can turn hostile, catching the way both of your nostrils flare and shoulders square up.
“Wait, there’s good news and bad news?” Your focus on Steve shifts as Eddie’s words sink in.
“Like I said, I’m going to finish balancing the books.” The metal head reminds you, giving a half salute with two fingers while simultaneously shooting a stern look to Steve who’s mouthing something behind you. “Your mechanic’s going to go over everything with you, we can talk about pricing when it’s all said and done.”
“Seriously?” You bluster as Eddie shrugs with the kind of nonchalance that sends you reeling before sitting back down, tuning the dial-up on the radio in his office. End of discussion.
“Look -“
“How do I even know that you know what you’re talking about?” You interrupt, making his full lips set into a straight line.
“Are you going to be like this the whole time?” Steve sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose before crossing his arms, the tops of his shoulders moving with them. 
A pleading expression softens his features instead of the hard combative one you were anticipating, and it helps your blood pressure return to normal. The realization hitting you that maybe skipping breakfast with a hangover probably wasn’t your smartest idea.
“N-no, sorry, I just feel like -“
“Shit? Yeah, I bet.” He chuckles, and your jaw clicks. Maybe if you count to three…
“Just tell me what’s wrong with my car, Steve.” It comes out clipped, but it's an improvement from your fingers twitching to rip that handsome head right off those shoulders that won’t stop trying to distract you.
“How about you tell me the last time you had your oil changed?” He counters, taking a few steps back to sit on the hood of the rusted baby blue Buick behind him. 
“Uhh, I- I think,” All the blood rushes to your cheeks, warming your skin as you try to wrack your brain and not focus on the way his legs spread wide to keep his balance. “Maybe, like, six months ago.”
“Six months?!” The number must be worse than whatever Steve was preparing for when a dirty hand runs through his hair, “and then you drove it three states to get here?”
“Yeah, I - I mean, hearing you say it out loud,” you grimace thinking of all the weeks you ignored that flashing orange light on your dashboard.
“So then you shouldn’t be surprised when I tell you that your engine locked up.” 
“Is this the bad news?” 
“Kind of,”
“What do you mean kind of?”
“Look, the good news is that I can fix it, the bad news is that I have to order a few parts that could take up to three weeks to get here, then the job itself is going to take me probably another week.” He sighs standing up, starting back towards your car with you quick on his heels.
“That’s the whole summer!” You argue like it could possibly make a difference, frustration pricking at the corners of your eyes watching him pop open the hood.
“More like half of it, but hey, you’re lucky I can even get it running again without having to replace the whole thing.” He meets your gaze from under his lashes leaning over the engine, long nimble fingers unscrewing the cap where your oil should go.
“So what am I supposed to do? How am I supposed to get around?” You know that part isn’t his problem, this entire mess is your own doing but it doesn’t stop it coming out in a whine. You blame your hangover.
“You’re gonna be just fine, city girl,” Steve grins up at you before reaching even further under the hood, muscles flexing with him, “besides we both know I can’t say no to Robin.”
He pulls at a small tube that’s purpose is unknown to you but you keep eyes trained on his movements like you have an idea, anything to keep the focus off the gold chain that dangles from his neck. 
“Or you.” The last part comes out so quiet, a focused look pinching his brows together as he continues his investigation.
“Me?” 
He doesn’t look at you when he shrugs, pulling at something with a little more force that makes you both flinch. 
“How much is this going to cost me, Steve?” Your defeat shows in your tone, as the question slips quietly from between your lips that you wish you’d have put gloss on now.
He grunts at the same time something pops against metal under his hands, muttering a string of curse words under his breath before standing back up wiping his palms on the white cotton of his tank top. Charcoal stains fill the small grooves in the fabric with each swipe of his hands, pulling the collar further down every time. It’s a losing battle not to look at his chest when every motion reveals more of the thick curls underneath. 
Steve clears his throat, letting you know that you’ve been caught and it’s at this moment you wish you could walk in front of the moving truck that drives loudly past the shop, only exaggerating the silence that follows.
“Don’t stress about that today,” he smiles, letting you off the hook for now, something mischievous dancing in his eyes for another time. “Like Eddie said, we’ll figure it out.”
“Don’t stress about it?! Have you met me?” You huff, the money you’ve saved up for the summer starting to dwindle right before your eyes. 
“I have actually,” Steve chuckles, stepping close enough for the tips of your shoes to touch his boots. He feels bold when you don’t make any attempt to move away like at the party or retreat when he closes the gap. A thumb and forefinger finding their way to your chin, tilting your head up to meet his gaze, “and you’re going to be fine, I promise.”
Your lips part on their own, the full force of his face from this close stealing the breath from your lungs. You can smell the coffee he had this morning and the mint from his toothpaste still lingering on his breath. The stubble that lines his sharp jaw is even more noticeable today, tapering off at the top of his neck making the cluster of moles that live there stand out even more. A pink tongue runs over his full bottom lip and it has your lashes fluttering against the tops of your cheeks.
“Now go get some food, grumpy,” his voice comes out low, a teasing edge to it that reminds you of what it’s like to have Steve Harrington flirt with you. “I’ll call when I get the parts, okay?”
It’s like detention junior year all over again as you turn into putty in his hand. Still too attractive for his own good, all you can do is nod while all the fight you had left inside you disappears as the pad of his thumb swipes soft against your heated skin just under your pouted lip before letting you go. He turns on his heel after that, walking back to the box of tools he has spread out over his workbench before adding,
“Do me a favor and tell Robin she owes me a new shirt.”
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beta’d by @sweetsweetjellybean
🌻 chapter two
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babyleostuff · 3 months
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౨ৎ voicemails kim mingyu leaves you while he’s on tour - fluff (with a pinch of angst), established relationship, gn!reader (pet names used: baby, honey)
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...one: you must've worn the hoodie i was wearing today right before i left because it smelled like you. it felt nice, kind of like you were here with me. wish you really were here though
...two: do you think it'll look weird if i put on some accessories for the encore today?
...three: i love you s'much. th's much (pause) wait you can't see. i swear 'm not that drunk jus' a bit. had a couple of drinks with the boys. jus' a couple. have i told you how much i love you? i love youuuu. mwah
...four: did you like the tik tok we posted with minghao today? i know you did. anyways, tell me about your day, i miss your voice
...five: i hope you're eating well honey, seriously you have to take care of yourself, and don't try to gaslight me into thinking that you're eating properly because i know you. i can't wait to come back and make a proper dinner for you.
...six: do you want to have a face time date tonight? i want to show you some of the gifts i bought for you
...seven: guess who almost fell off of the stage today. definitely not me (pause) definitely
...eight: is everything okay baby? you haven't called or texted today, i'm getting kind of worried. i know you might be busy, but please just let me know you're okay
...nine: i added some new songs to our playlist. i was listening to them on the way to the stadium and thought they would fit perfectly for our late night drives
...ten: do you miss me as much as i miss you?
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safetypinxtales · 4 months
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Lonely with you | Azriel
summary: it seems like everyone's found their mates, except you. On a sleepless night you turn to your friend, in hopes that being alone, together, will feel slightly less lonely.
words: 1.5k
warnings: fluff, feelings of loneliness, thirsting over our boy az and his thighs, kind of just a drawn out drabble, some angst, generally just softness, Azriel with a book needs a warning in and of itself, very slight jealousy, neutrally described reader/no reader description, no use of y/n, PINING
notes: haven't written in years, and never befor for Azriel, or anyone from acotar, so bare with me. Not sure what I think of this, nor what the future might hold, but I had some time off uni and this idea that I just couldn't seem to get out of my head. Hope you enjoy it nonetheless!
part 2
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You knew what picture was waiting for you in the living room of the House before you even rounded that corner. The distinct sound of pages turning, the hint of whiskey in the air, and him. 
That scent that was just so distinctly Azriel it almost made you forget that echoing emptiness in your chest. 
The sight that greeted you as you entered the room belonged in a museum, or at the very least at the front of some Day Court scribe’s lecture hall, being studied by the brightest minds in Prythian. You wanted to commission Feyre to paint it from your memories so it could be immortalized, even if just for your eyes. Because by the Gods, it was mesmerizing. 
Azriel sat – no, sprawled across one of the couches, those thick, muscled, sweatpant-clad thighs so deliciously, invitingly, teasingly spread apart. The book in his hand was not one you recognized, but then his taste in literature was slightly more… sophisticated than yours. But that just made it all so much more enticing didn’t it? The thought of this gorgeously dark, winged male consuming deep, meaningful art? It would make any sane person fall to their knees. 
The hazel of his eyes didn’t show any sign of surprise as his gaze met yours. He knew you were coming, most likely courtesy of the shadows leisurely curling around his shoulders. Cauldron, was he a sight…
… And your friend. Unfortunately.
“Are you just going to stand there all night or will you eventually move?” Right, right. How long had your feet been rooted to the floor? Judging by the humorous tone of his voice and that boyish sparkle in his eyes, probably a tad too long. 
Forcing your body to take a step, and another, you tried to think of something – anything to say. 
“Sorry, I–... I just didn’t expect you to be here is all,” liar, “I guess you caught me by surprise”. It wasn’t the best excuse in the world, but with the situation at hand it could have been a lot worse. Like, a lot. Besides, it’s not like you could have told him the truth.
Sorry Azriel, it’s just that I have been desperately yearning for you for the last couple of years and seeing you like this, looking all boyfriend-y, has me nearly swallowing my own tongue because of how perfect you look. I am just humiliatingly obsessed with every single little thing you do, as well as horrifyingly lonely to a default. In a non creepy way, of course. 
… You would rather free-dive off the dining room balcony before ever admitting that to him. 
His brows furrowed as he observed you, like he could see the lie written across your face, before humming lightly, almost as to himself. He reached a hand out to the glass resting on the coffee table and brought it to his lips, taking a sip of the amber liquid inside. Your eyes were trained on his mouth as he lowered the glass. Trained on the candlelight reflected in the alcohol wetting his lips. Those shiny, pouty, full–
His tongue slipped out and delicately swiped across his lower lip, licking off the remnants of the whiskey from the glass in his hand, and it took everything in you to not whimper at the sight. 
Cauldron boil you.
Needing something to ground yourself, you made your way over to pour yourself a glass of whatever Azriel was drinking and collapsed beside him on the couch, trying to roll that stubborn stiffness out of your shoulders.
”Can’t sleep either?” He asked you on a slight chuckle. 
“No, not with them going at it like bunnies,” you sighed, “how is it even possible for Cassian to… you know? I mean, not only is it day after day, but all night, non-stop? You need– I mean not you specifically, I don’t know anything about your sexual habits, just– just males in general,” oh Gods, “you– you need to rest, at some point – right?”
Azriel took in your flustered state, and pursed his lips as if to keep from laughing. His amusement did not help your case at all, only making the heat crawl further up your neck, your ears positively aflame. 
“I guess the mating bond has its perks,” he surmised, and you couldn’t escape the huff that exited your nose. 
That damned mating bond. The very one the Mother seemed to be handing out left to right lately, to everyone except you. And Azriel. But unlike you, he was a damn catch and could have anyone he’d like. 
“Am I an absolute wench for being jealous of Nesta? And Elain? And Feyre?” You whined as you threw your head back on the couch.
“Not at all,” Azriel’s raspy voice comforted you, easing the tightness in your stomach. You still felt like one though; Nesta was your best friend and you were happy for her, but still–
“It’s just so unfair! They were born like, yesterday! I have been suffering through a mostly miserable existence for over five centuries now and I have never even come close to a connection like they have,” you rolled your neck, “I am over the moon for them, don’t get me wrong, and I hate to make their happiness about me–“
“But being alone around people who… aren’t, can be very lonely,” Azriel finished and your heart clenched as you looked at him. Beautiful, kind, caring Azriel. One of your best friends, and the male you were hopelessly, devastatingly in love with. 
Knowing he, too, was hurting was painful in itself, but also slightly comforting. Knowing you weren’t alone in your loneliness. 
“You’re in pain,” he mumbled, and you opened your mouth to answer, but you couldn’t. Because it wasn’t really a question was it? “Your shoulders,” he noted, “they’re tense.”
“Oh, it’s fine, really. Nothing to worry about, just a small kink,” you tried to brush it off, but he looked at you with such intensity it made your whole body tingle.
“No it’s not,” it was like he could see right through you, “No, you have been worrying your neck ever since you sat down.” He pondered a moment before he sat up a little straighter beckoning for you to move closer. “Come on, let me help you with that.”
Your mouth fell open. 
Was he insinuating he wanted to rub your back? Your half naked, barely-nightgown-clad back. With his hands. Those magical, beautiful hands. Oh Gods.
Your attempt of a protest died in your throat at the slight raise of his eyebrows. He was not to argue with.
He marked the page he was on and placed his book down on the table in front of you, his eyes not straying from you once. Like he was afraid you would bolt if he looked away, even just for a second. 
In his defense, you very well might have.
A shaky breath released from your lungs as you put your glass down and readjusted your position on the couch until you were situated between his legs. With your back facing him, you carefully pulled your hair over one shoulder to give him better access, trying to block out the thoughts of how incredibly warm those bite-able thighs of his were.
The warm calluses of his hands on your skin set you ablaze, and as he carefully started to massage out the knots in your upper back you swore you could have melted, then and there. 
You couldn’t help leaning in to his skillful touch. You also couldn’t help the breathy groan that escaped you as he started to work on a particularly tense area. 
Or how your heart rate picked up as you heard what you swore was Azriel’s breath hitching in response. 
You basked in the intimacy of the moment, fully enjoying all of his undivided attention. 
The gesture, the moment, it all felt so domestic and comforting that the constant emptiness in your chest started to close over. Even if just for now. Even if it was all borrowed; a lovely, elusive fantasy – you let yourself feel whole. 
You barely registered his hands slowing to a stop, or the new found looseness in your shoulders. Barely registered as his hands slid down your arms and slowly tugged you back towards his chest. 
Not until you were engulfed in his warmth, his arms wrapped around you did you realize how well you fit together.
Like two pieces of a puzzle.
“Be lonely with me tonight,” his breath tickled your ear, “please.”
You knew it probably wasn’t wise. That tomorrow, when all of this would be gone, the hurt would resurface. The loneliness even heavier than before. But you couldn’t get yourself to care. To tell him no. Tell yourself no.
Instead you burrowed deeper in his embrace, closed your eyes, and even if just for tonight, you let his warmth fill the void in your chest. 
Until that void had been replaced by a vibrating, golden, glow.
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arieslost · 2 months
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home to you | op81
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oscar piastri x fem!reader
summary: oscar does what he should’ve done a long time ago.
word count: 2,978
warnings: healing sunburn right at the beginning, a touch of angst
masterlist — join my tag list here!
this is a PART TWO! read part one here :)
© arieslost 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.
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Your sunburn is peeling.
Oscar’s been watching you absentmindedly pick at it for the last ten minutes as you recount your day to him. He’s paying attention to what you’re saying, of course, but now he’s worried that you might accidentally hurt yourself.
“Stop doing that,” he says when you pause to catch your breath, reaching for his phone as if he could put his hand through and stop you himself.
“What?” You frown, and then look at your shoulder. “Oh, right. It’s weirdly satisfying though.”
“This is why you can’t go to the beach by yourself.” Oscar sighs. “You never put on enough sunscreen.”
“I know,” you reply quietly.
As much as both of you have tried, neither of you can help the awkward undertones that seep into every silence you share now. Oscar knows you love him, and you know that he doesn’t feel the same way.
You think he doesn’t feel the same way.
When he saw that look on your face that morning in the kitchen, it reminded him of the way he stared at you on prom night. Oscar didn’t get asked to the senior prom, but you did, and you had turned the offer down. Oscar asked you why, and you told him that you only wanted to go with him, otherwise you weren’t going. You’d dragged him back and forth from your table to the dance floor all night long, and it all would’ve faded into the mush of fleeting high school memories if your favorite song hadn’t come on. Oscar remembers every detail of how your eyes lit up, how you cried, “I love this song!” even though he knew you did, and how you’d grabbed his hands and started dancing with a refreshed energy. He felt like time had stopped and his world revolved around you, and it felt right.
So yeah, he knew the moment you gave him that look that not only did he still love you, but you finally, finally felt the same way. And, for the second time, he’d epically fucked it up.
He often wishes that he could go back and confess to you like he wanted to that night. You’d stayed over because you were too tired to drive home. You were both single. It was the perfect time. But now it’s four years later and he’s sitting in the hotel bathroom on the other side of the world, his girlfriend asleep in the hotel bed, and you on the other end of his phone screen picking at your sunburn that he could’ve prevented had he spent more time with you on vacation.
“You doing okay, Osc?” You ask, pulling on a hoodie of his that you stole from him before he left for his very first F1 race. “Aside from the races, I mean. I know you’re doing great with those.”
“Yeah, I’m alright.” The words come out with practiced ease. “I’d rather hear about how you’re doing though.” I miss you like you wouldn’t believe.
“I think I’ve told you everything like five times now,” you giggle. “I could tell you about the guy that came up to me in the grocery store this afternoon and took a painstakingly long time to ask for my number, but that’s not a long story.”
Oscar’s heart stops. “What?” He replies, teeth gritted, before he clears his throat and lightens his tone. “I mean, what?”
“Yeah, it was kind of strange. He started the conversation by asking me how you were doing, obviously, because you’re so cool and famous-” Oscar flips you off when you roll your eyes, and you laugh. “Anyway, I guess that was his icebreaker, because then he just abruptly segued into grilling me right there in the cereal aisle about my life and how he ‘couldn’t believe he’d never seen me before.’” You recount dramatically. “I’m telling you, Osc, it was nonstop cheesy line after cheesy line. I felt so bad for him I let him have my number.”
“So, he used me as an in and then harassed you until you gave him your number?”
You nod slowly. “Pretty much.”
“You better not actually be considering going out with this guy.” Oscar scoffs.
“Oh, no, I’m not!” You rush to clarify, and he can see a faint blush rising on your cheeks. “I mean, it’s not like I’m waiting for anyone-anything. He was just weird. I only gave him my number so he’d leave me alone… I blocked him when he texted me.”
“You’re horrible,” he starts laughing now, relieved that this guy never even stood a chance. “I love it.”
“You’re supposed to be encouraging me to get out there and find a boyfriend, loser. Brush up on the best friend manual.” You complain, pulling the hood over your head and hiding your face from him so he can’t see how much it hurts to think about finding someone that isn’t him.
He doesn’t notice anyway; he’s distracted by the sound of the covers moving and his girlfriend yawning.
You hear it too, and glance up at the camera. “You have to go?”
His heart breaks at how sad you look. “Yeah, sounds like she’s actually waking up this time. Sorry, honey.”
You shrug, and he knows you’re trying to appear unbothered. “It’s okay. We got, what, an hour and a half? That’s a whole extra 45 minutes or so.”
“You’re allowed to tell me how you really feel, y’know.”
“Damn it, Oscar. You just see right through me. I don’t know why I even bother.” You sigh, covering your face with your hands.
“I don’t know why, either,” he attempts to joke. “Look, I-”
“Oscar? Where are you?” His girlfriend calls, and you stiffen up at the sound of her voice.
“Be there in a minute!” He responds, turning his attention back to you. “I’ll call you again as soon as possible, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Bye, honey.”
“Bye, Osc.”
You hang up first.
“I love you,” he whispers to his blank phone screen, and gets up to start his day.
You say it back to your own blank screen and go to sleep.
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Oscar comes to the steadfast conclusion that he wants you and only you at his side at his home race, and not as a friend.
Breaking up with his girlfriend still looms over him. He lies awake for way too long at night trying to figure out the nicest way to do it, but his thoughts always end up taking a detour to you and how he wishes it was you sleeping next to him instead.
Despite the struggle going on in his mind, he goes through the motions of PDA with her for all the cameras and other drivers in the paddock to see. Lando is the only one who realizes what his issue is.
“Mate, you have to figure this out.” The older driver said out of the blue as they were lounging in McLaren hospitality after qualifying.
“Huh?” Oscar frowned at him, tearing his eyes away from his texts with you. “I know I fucked up that quali, but it’s not like I can’t improve.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about, you muppet.” Lando rolled his eyes, and said your name like it’s obvious. “You just have to break up with the girl you’re with now so you can have the girl you really want.”
“You say that like it’s so simple.” Oscar mumbled, looking at the text from you that had just come in.
Just focus on the race, Osc. Quali’s behind you, it doesn’t matter anymore. I’ll be cheering you on, what could possibly go wrong??
“It is, if you think about it. Besides, you’ve been acting so weird lately she might already think something’s up.”
“Gee, thanks. That makes me feel a lot better.” Oscar groaned, sinking lower into his chair.
“Always here for you, mate.”
“I was being sarcastic.”
“I don’t care.”
That enlightening conversation gets Oscar to finally work up the courage to tell his girlfriend those dreaded words following the race– “We need to talk.”
He waits until they’re in the hotel room after dinner to say it so there’s no audience, primarily because he knows that she’s prone to throwing fits when things don’t go her way. The memory of her losing her mind when he took you to breakfast during vacation comes screaming back to him at the speed of light.
She doesn’t say anything at first; instead, she takes her time removing her shoes and taking the pins out of her hair. Oscar can’t stand the silence, so he starts speaking again.
“It’s about-”
“I think I know what this is about.” She interrupts him.
“You do?”
“I’d have to be stupid not to know, Oscar. You’ve been off for the past few days, it’s only with me, and every time I wake up you’re hiding in the bathroom on the phone.” She holds up a hand when he opens his mouth. “I know it’s her, and I’ve known since that vacation. You don’t have to tell me.”
“You’re… you’re not gonna yell?” He can’t hide the surprise in his voice.
“It won’t get me anywhere, will it?”
“It never did.”
She smiles matter-of-factly. “I guess I have to work on that.”
She packs her things without argument. Oscar offers to buy her a plane ticket somewhere, but she waves him off and thanks him anyway before walking out the door.
The Australian Grand Prix is in two weeks. Oscar doesn’t think before he calls you.
“I’m coming home. I need to see you.”
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Your heart has been in your throat ever since Oscar called you this morning. He was so hasty that he didn’t even tell you when he was coming, so every little movement you see outside your window has you running to see if it’s him or not.
He doesn’t show up until almost 9:30 at night. You can hear the engine of his car as he flies through your neighborhood with practiced ease and nearly drifts into your driveway. Your stomach is jumping with nerves and excitement; you didn’t think you’d see him for another two weeks, and despite the awkwardness that your feelings have brought to your friendship, you want nothing more than to hug your best friend.
He starts impatiently knocking on the door as you nearly trip down the stairwell in your rush to let him in.
“Hold on!” You shout, fingers shaking as you unlock the door and wrench it open. “Are you trying to break my door?”
“Jokes later, let me hold you,” he says, reaching for you and meeting you in the middle of the doorway as he pulls you into his chest for a tight embrace.
You melt into him immediately, your arms wrapped around his neck and your nose pressed to the warm skin that peeks out of his hoodie. “I can’t believe you’re here,” you mumble, squeezing him.
He shivers, kissing the top of your head. “I’m here, baby.”
I’m sorry, baby. You think about that so much that it shouldn’t hurt anymore. It sobers your mood a little.
“Why, though?” You ask, pulling away a little to look at him. “Don’t you have things to be doing?”
“I may have forced them to clear my schedule by coming home without telling anyone.”
“Oscar!” You exclaim. “Why? You could get in trouble!”
“Can we talk inside?”
“Yeah, of course. C’mon.” You take his hand and lead him into your house.
He takes off his shoes, leaves his suitcase in the hall, and goes to your living room on autopilot, where he flops down on the couch and lets out a long breath. You sit next to him, knees bumping together as you look at him with a reasonable amount of concern. “You’re acting weird. What’s wrong with you?”
“I broke up with her.” He says, rolling his head to the side so he’s looking at you. “So, nothing’s wrong with me.”
“Bullshit, Osc, it seemed to me like you really liked her.”
“You didn’t, though.”
“Who cares what I think?” Your brain fully computes his words. “Wait- actually, no. I’m not even going to act surprised by the fact that you knew that.” You sigh.
“I care what you think. I care about you. A lot.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“I don’t think you do.” He sits up straighter now, turning his whole body to face you. “Like, in a romantic way.”
You blink at him a couple times. “No you don’t.”
“I don’t?” He repeats incredulously.
“You can’t. You don’t.” You say. “You’re lying.”
“I’m lying?” He says through a laugh. “You’ve known me your whole life. When have I ever lied to you?”
You press your lips together. The only time he’s ever lied to you is when he planned your surprise parties. “I’m gonna need you to do a really good job explaining yourself, otherwise I’m kicking you out. You can’t do this to me, Oscar, you know how I feel-”
“Yes, I do, and I’d love to explain if you’d stop spiraling for a second.” He interrupts, taking your hands to ground you.
You’re once again having the dilemma of wanting to push him away and pull him closer simultaneously. The pressure of his hands holding yours succeeds in calming you, so you allow it.
“The whole reason I knew how you felt in the first place is because of the way you looked at me in the kitchen. You didn’t notice, but I looked at you the exact same way at the prom.” He says, gauging your reaction by how your face contorts slightly as you try to remember the prom at all, aside from the fleeting memory of forcing him to slow dance with you. “That feeling like time stops? Like-”
“Like I got hit by a truck,” you recall, looking down as he runs his thumbs over your knuckles.
“Right.” He nods. “Look, the bottom line here is that I screwed up by not telling you then, and if I had, we would’ve been dating for years at this point and this conversation wouldn’t even be happening.”
You feel like you look like a fish out of water with how your jaw is opening and closing, searching for something to say in response. “Osc-”
“If this makes you change your mind, I get it.” He continues. “But the whole reason I came here is to tell you that I love you. I’m in love with you and I have been since we were 18.”
You go to muster up something to say in response when he says one more thing. “Oh, and I’m tired of only being able to see you through the phone. That’s the other reason.”
You can’t help it– that, paired with his polite cat smile, his flushed cheeks, and his confession has you dissolving into giggles. That quickly morphs into laughter that sends you leaning so far forward your head is practically in Oscar’s lap, but he doesn’t seem to mind because he’s laughing too.
“I hate you so much,” you gasp out, pushing yourself back up so you can look at him when you tell him the complete and total truth. “I’ve been in love with you since we were 14.”
“Shit, that means I have eight years to make up for, not four.”
“Sucks to suck.” You say, easily falling back into your age-old banter.
“You sound like Lando,” he says, wrinkling his nose. “And I was gonna ask if I could kiss you.”
“Ah, shoot. I ruined it.”
“Hmm, no. I’m gonna ask you anyway.” He shifts closer to you, brushing your hair out of your face with both hands. “Can I kiss you? Please?”
You start nodding before he even finishes asking, maybe too enthusiastically, but it’s Oscar. He knows you. He wants you. You don’t need to be embarrassed.
The press of his lips against yours is soft, gentle. You always thought that if you ever kissed Oscar it might be too weird, but the only thing you feel now is right.
It feels right to thread your fingers into his hair. It feels right to let him tug you closer, closer, closer, until you have no choice but to straddle him so you can be as close as he wants you. It feels right when his hands slip under your shirt and lightly run over the skin of your back, when his tongue meets yours, when you give his hair an experimental tug and he moans into your mouth.
The only thing wrong about it is that you have no choice but to break the kiss in order to breathe, but even then you don’t move far from each other, breaths mixing in the minimal space between you both.
“We could have been doing that for a long time,” Oscar sighs, throwing his head back against the couch.
“We have all the time in the world now that we stopped being idiots and confessed.” You point out.
“D’you think you can come to the race in a couple weeks? We can take it slow with this, no one needs to know… I just want you to be there.” He asks.
“Of course, Osc, are you kidding?” You run your hands over his shoulders and down to where his hands rest on your hips. “Though, if you win, I can’t promise no PDA or anything.”
“I’d expect nothing less from my girlfriend.” You can feel him tense up a little, like he’s expecting you to react negatively, but he relaxes immediately when your smile lights up your whole face and you kiss him again.
“I love you,” he whispers against your lips.
“I love you,” you whisper back.
No one else needs to hear it just yet. You only need to tell each other.
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note: i sincerely hope this made up for any tears i may have caused with the angst in the first part. this is the first time i’ve ever been inspired to write a part 2, and i think it’s because i desperately needed it to end happily. thank you so much for all the love on falling for you; i never expected it to get as much attention as it did!
requests are OPEN, and my inbox is always open for comments, criticism, and conversation! feel free to pop in!
reblogs are greatly appreciated <33
dividers by @/saradika !
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