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howtosurvivebeingsingle · 3 years

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I Do, Do I?

If you follow my regular blog that I rarely post on, you'll know that my heterosexual roomie proposed to me. The thing is, we're both hetero females that decided that instead of getting married by 50 at the rate we're going, we may as well. The amount of benefits married couples get while they're still in college is ridiculous. We have friends that live a town away that are both married since they graduated high school and the amount of money they were able to save landed them a cozy four-bedroom house. Sounds too good to be true, and believe me I wish it were. I am still attending my local university myself trying to double major, as is my roommate. We both have multiple jobs to support our apartment but with expenses, we're borderline broke. There's enough to get by, that being said when classes start is where the trouble begins. Marriage is looking pretty tempting right now. Is it really all it's cracked out to be? Here are the details I've heard so far; You get generous financial aid meaning starving is less likely, Married life is less expensive which is less cost of living in an apartment or house, Mutual motivation from your spouse (depends but mine's fine), and it prepares you for what marriage is actually like.

In Short, my maybe wife and I will pay less for college, less for housing, have that emotional support most people lack, and get a taste of what being married to a man is like (sort of). The bargain is that if we actually go through with this, we'll still date men as we please and if we're in an actual relationship and the guy proposes we get a divorce. Imagine your maid of honor is your ex-wife? There's more humor to it. He picks you up for a date and she's watching tv. Before you go, "Bye Honey!", or she gets the door for you and introduces herself as your actual married wife. The situation is so complex that I'm actually near writing a book about it. Here's where I advertise my Finding Mr. Darcy book trilogy that's in the works. If there's one thing I know about, it's being single. I'm the Carrie Bradshaw of singles instead of sex, that is if I can even claim that title. I asked my friend if he thought being married had all the perks and he said this; "It's a pipedream trying to trap singles into thinking life is better with someone else. True as that last statement maybe, the rest is not. The idea is that after marriage it's time to settle down. You move into a cottage in the plains, wide-open spaces where all the little kids can run around. Your husband comes back from work and the two of you snuggle in bed without a care, it's bullshit. Girls and I mean girls are too high maintenance now that you've got to give them everything they want or it's no deal. Hell, you're even lucky to find a woman who actually wants to care for you as much as herself. Total pipedream, and waste in this century."

That was the first time I had ever heard him speak so hopelessly about love. I expected an answer like "No, true love is out there somewhere." as he often said, but this was not the case at all. Either he was in a really bad mood that day, or I don't know my best friend like I thought I did. The next day, I decided to take a look at married couples in the workplace, by workplace, I mean my job in digital services. From what I was seeing was a lot of arguing. Either the man would be on the computer and the woman was nagging on him the whole time or the woman was on the computer and the man was making her feel like she was stupid. If both parties were separate, the wife would call every ten minutes to ask meaningless questions, or the wife was present with two or more hyper kids. It was hard for them to get anything done with or without their spouse present. I also decided to take a look at single parents and the closest one was my sister. In 2019, she got pregnant with my nephew by her boyfriend Will. She had him in march of 2020, so he's about a year old and beginning to get used to his legs. When she's home, she's stressed from being home from work, and on her off days, she's stressed with her son's rambunctious behavior. Our mother watches him when she's working her ten-hour shifts and leaves the rest to her when she gets back. Pretty soon it'll just be my sister and her kid when mom moves down south of the US. Both can verify that he's quite the handful and with my experience, he is. That doesn't mean I love him any less, but my share of babysitting isn't any easier.

The situation is mutual whether you're married or not with kids. Stress with a side of stress and exhaustion. Putting kids aside, I've seen couples without kids like my maybe wife's other best friend. Things seem all prim and proper when they come to visit, but according to her, they still manage to argue almost on a daily. My coworkers feel the same way about marriage life even when I had explained my situation. They continued to urge me to take things into careful consideration before jumping head into marriage. I kept getting negative answers from people despite my search to find some hope for the situation. Then the question crossed my mind; despite the fairytale images given to us in childhood, is it really worth the trouble of getting married?

Julie: "It always ends in tears. Someone leaves, someone dies, or you get a divorce."

Varsha: "So long as they compliment you. You need support from both parties for it to work."

Denny: "It depends. You don't need a man or woman to support you all the way, you can do fine just being single. My wife and I are great, but I'd be just as fine alone."

Enzo: "No. All odds are against you in the long run. The woman finds someone else to bug and takes half of everything."

Annie: "It's more of a want than a need. The best thing is not to be pressured into it if you're not 100% into it."

Vinny: "Only if you're ready and trust each other all the way."

Marcus: "The question you should be asking is if friendship is worth it. That's what it really comes down to."

Lori: "It can be fulfilling despite the fear of failure."

The answers kept leading me in circles and in the end, I wound up back where I started. It was a total toss-up of whether you got heads or tails, but I wasn't about to give in that easily. I decided to take my venture to a baseball game on Friday and what I saw there nearly startled me. A couple of 65 years renewed their vows at the stadium. I started to think that maybe all it did take was a bit of compromise and despite half the negativity from my interview and friends there really is someone for everyone. Perhaps the divorced people just haven't found the right person just yet. Like my grandmother on my mother's side, she married four men before she met my grandfather and they've been together almost fifty years. I guess you could say it was a task of trial and error, but it worked out in the long run. Neither of them has ever had a reason to want to divorce. Before I leave questions unanswered, yes my grandfather too also had his share of divorces. The numbers don't seem to matter, only the fact that there really could be someone out there for everyone. A glimmer of hope to end this rather late and brief update. I wonder if there really is hope, is there still time for we singles of every shade and orientation. Is there truly that soulmate we all long for somewhere besides where we are? Until next time and Much Love Your Way Darlings!

#sex and the city #singles #carrie bradshaw #tumblr #romance #couple #lovers #relationship #blog post #july 2021

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danyka-fendyr · 4 years

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Absence of Good - 8

Chapter Eight: Despair and Devotion

I’m so sorry this took so long to get out everyone! I’ve been doing literally a ridiculous amount of traveling lately, what with COVID-19 and all the travel plans I had even before the outbreak. Suffice it to say, I’m extremely exhausted as I post this, and I haven’t edited it at all so I deeply apologize for any spelling mistakes or any other errors. Thank you so much to all of you for being so patient and waiting for me! (Also yes I did just watch Emma and it shows okay?)

Taglist: @dreamwritesimagines @rhabakoli @alwaysadreamingoptimist

AoG Taglist: @pancakefancake @prettyboyspenerrr @youreasnack @alioop3818 @newtslatte @rathersuspiciousbumblebee

Wordcount: 3773

Warnings: None! This is mostly fluff. Some vague references to PTSD.

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.” ― Jane Austen

You rolled over in your bed, trying to fall into the spot of sunlight you knew would be painted over your sheets at this time of morning. Though you were only vaguely aware of what time it was, it was probably about an hour before you were actually supposed to wake up, your mind just starting to stir again. Instead of encountering your usual sunny spot in bed though, you found an entirely different source of warmth.

You cracked your eyes open in confusion. Dr. Spencer Reid was lying in your favorite pool of early morning sunshine, and you felt a brief moment of panic strike its way through your chest before doing an evaluation and realizing that you were both fully dressed and furthermore, had remained sober last night. It came back to you as you looked at him, remembering that he had helped you inside as you broke down crying and a very sleepy, very compromised version of your current self had begged him to stay with you.

Was that bad? It was probably okay to platonically sleep with your coworker, you reasoned. Nothing had happened. You hadn’t even thought about it happening. Maybe under other circumstances you would have thought about what a nice mouth he had or the look he got in his eyes when he was concentrating on something or his hands, which were very nice hands, you had to admit-

Oh gosh. Nope. Nope, nope, nope. This was a terrible idea, and had been a terrible idea before you had even had the idea, before anyone in the history of time had ever had an idea. You had to get out of here, right now.

Except here was your apartment, which was also a problem. Which meant that Spencer had to get out of here right now.

You shook his shoulder, pulling him out of his sleep. You almost felt bad for doing it, having noticed the dark circles under his eyes on more than one occasion. He looked so young and sweet in his sleep too. Spencer always had a boyish quality to him, but in his sleep it only increased, the concerned wrinkle in his brow falling away to a soft little half-smile that made you wonder if he was dreaming, and if he was what about.

That only increased your urgent need to get him out of here and awake though. Your half-asleep mind was still compromised, and your traitor fingers were itching to swipe across the velvet of his mouth, to gently push back the locks of hair falling into his forehead. All of which you had certainly never thought about before.

“Spencer! Wake up!”

It took a moment, but gradually he complied, honey brown eyes emerging only to be lit up by the morning sky.

“Hmmm? Oh, Y/N.” He smiled hazily. “Good morning.”

You suspected he hadn’t forgotten a single detail of what had happened last night, what with his eidetic memory, so you didn’t bother giving him a recap. Instead, you launched plan “Get Spencer out of here immediately” into action.

“We’ve got work in 2 hours. You have to get out of here,” you said, all brisk business to counteract Spencer’s alarming lethargy.

You had never seen the man relaxed, and he chose today of all days to appear pleasantly drowsy, of all things.

“2 hours? I think we have a little bit of time.” Spencer chuckled, raising his arms above his head, the muscles in his arms tugging his rumpled white dress shirt up to reveal the surprisingly toned planes of his stomach.

Which you were not thinking about. Which you were under no circumstances even contemplating contemplating.

“Well, you live 20 minutes from here, and you’ll need clean clothes and-”

Spencer cut your frantic ramblings off, seeming confused by your concern as he sat halfway up.

“I have clothes in my go-bag. What’s the matter?” A look of concern settled into the muddy depths of his eyes, and he reached out to pull you closer, one warm hand wrapping securely around your elbow. “Did you have a nightmare?”

You felt that tugging in your chest again, that longing, that need to just fall into bed with him. To take a sick day. To take 12 sick days. To lay in your bed with Spencer and never ever leave, just stay there running your fingers through his hair, tracing the veins in his arms. All things you absolutely could not do.

“No,” you said quietly, unable to stop staring into his eyes, entranced.

He leaned forward, and you caught a whiff of him, the smell of mostly coffee with something else a little bit woodsy left over from some aftershave or cologne he must wear.

“Then what?”

He tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, and your heart did a little tap-dance in your chest.

I need you to leave because I want to kiss you desperately, but I can’t.

“I’m afraid if you stay, I’ll get too attached. You saw how I was last night. I’m…unbalanced. And if you stay, I might start relying on you, and I can’t do that.”

One full truth in exchange for the absence of another.

“Relying on me how? Relying on me for help? Being willing to come to me when you feel ‘unbalanced’? Because I want that, Y/N. I want you to come to me.” His voice was soft, low.

You were so screwed.

“It’s a bad idea,” You whispered, still not looking away.

Then he said the worst thing he could have possibly said to you at that moment, when you were already so weak for him, so tantalizingly on the edge of something equally dangerous for both of you.

“You think I don’t need you too?”

Sometimes I need you so bad I can’t breathe because of it. Right now, right now I need you so bad I can’t breathe because of it.

“We’re not supposed to. We’re not supposed to need each other. What if something happens?” Still, you were leaning towards him, falling forward like gravity was playing some kind of sick game with you.

“It already did. And maybe it makes me selfish, but I’d rather have as much of this as I can get now instead of waiting for something terrible to happen again.”

Did he even know what he was saying? What he was implying? How good his mouth looked when he was saying those kinds of things to you?

Okay. Just kiss me, and I’ll forget everything. I’ll forgive you for every selfish sin you’ve ever committed if we can make this one of them.

“You should go.” You had never sounded less convicted of anything in your life.

Spencer faltered, and immediately you regretted the words when you saw the flicker of pain race through him. The way his hand fell from your face, the way his eyes fell to the sheets to hide how much you had wounded him. And before he could speak, you desperately scrambled to say something, anything to make it better, and said the one thing you probably shouldn’t have, if only because you meant it.

“I don’t want you to, though.” Another correction would be necessary for that kind of truth, and you frantically changed your mind again and tacked on a new amendment. “Which is why you should.”

He was looking up at you with a blazing hope and determination now, though.

“But you don’t want me to?”

Not even a little bit. I’ve never wanted anything less.

“Not even a little bit. I’ve never wanted anything less.”

You shouldn’t be allowed to speak words before 7 AM.

“I know how to make pancakes,” Spencer offered.

“I like pancakes.”

“Okay. Good.”

Then he got up out of your bed which immediately made your life slightly easier because at least he’s no longer just lying there in your bed looking beautiful.

While Spencer made pancakes, you hurried to get dressed, tying your hair up into a bun and abandoning the thought of anything more fashionable. Most of your makeup was just a touched-up version of whatever ended up smeared all over your pillows last night.

“You know, in the U.S., the most pancakes are eaten in the South. They make up 32.5% of pancake consumption in America.”

You laughed a little bit, unable to stop yourself from smiling at him. It was a little bit blissful having him here in your kitchen like this, making you pancakes for breakfast. You were allowed to have this, right? This little bit of platonic intimacy?

“No, I didn’t know that.”

“Well now you do.”

You kind of thought he smiled like an angel.

You stole the finished pancake straight out of the pan from him, and he gave you a playfully disapproving frown.

“Hey! I wasn’t done with that!”

You hopped up on the counter beside him and took a bite out of it, ignoring how hot it was in your hands.

“Tastes pretty done to me,” you responded cheekily.

He reached into the cupboard behind you, knowing in that creepy way that he knows everything exactly where your plates were, procuring one for you to place the pancake on. You set it down, looking up only to find yourself in a very compromising position. He was so close to you, and he wasn’t moving away. He could kiss you if he just leaned a little bit farther forward. You wanted him to kiss you. Does he know that too? Does he know where you keep your secrets just like he knows where you keep your plates?

“We can’t do this again,” you said, your voice coming out pleasantly firm for the first time this morning.

“Can’t do what?” He pushed hesitantly.

“We’re colleagues. You making me breakfast is weird. Besides, we wouldn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea, right?”

His posture went stiff, and he pulled back further away from you, the space between you freezing over.

“Right. I should go get dressed for work. We have to go soon.”

He disappeared and you took another bite of your pancake. It was cold.

You made a point to arrive separately from Spencer, but the second you walked into the office you knew it was pointless because there he was being cajoled by Morgan about how he was wearing his go-bag clothes and therefore must have gotten laid last night, and then you locked eyes with the very wise Jennifer Jareau and you could see that she knew. She could see the messy traces of your hastily corrected makeup and she knew exactly where Spencer was last night.

You needed to fix this. Now.

“I’m going to go grab some coffee. Missed my usual stop this morning.” You made pointed eye contact with her.

“I could go for some too,” she said, casually following you.

You had been out of hearing range for maybe a second before she asked the obvious question.

“Did you and Spencer sleep together?”

“Sleep? Yes. Anything else? No.”

“So, he stayed at your place but nothing romantic happened.”

“Why do you sound so skeptical?” You scoffed, pouring coffee into the Styrofoam cup you had grabbed.

Jennifer grabbed your arm, making direct eye contact with you.

“I sound skeptical because I’ve known Spencer for years and I’m a profiler, which means I know that he’s in love with you, and you’re in love with him.”

It was a shot in the dark, and it just happened to hit you right in the heart.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said, adding cream to your coffee now.

“Cut the crap, Y/N. If you can’t be honest with him at least be honest with me.”

“Fine. I think I might love him. He’s the best man I’ve ever met. I am absolutely not allowed to love him. Are you happy now?”

“Why aren’t you allowed to love him? I mean, there are the obvious reasons, of course, but there are ways to get around those. Those are just excuses. So, what’s stopping you?”

“An interrogation over my morning coffee. How lovely.” You forced your voice to be breezy, light.

It didn’t work on JJ, though. She just waited, knowing that sooner or later you would break the silence.

Your hands were shaking as you stirred the cream in your cup.

“I’m not in a good headspace for that kind of thing right now JJ. I’m all messed up, and I don’t want to mistake feelings of being grateful to him for feelings of love. He’s helped me more than anyone can know but I don’t want to get it all mixed up. I can’t love him like this.”

Another moment of silence lingered between the two of you before JJ spoke, solemn and quiet.

“Are you afraid you can’t love him like this or are you afraid he can’t love you like this?”

Your hands locked up around the stirring stick at her words, jaw clenching around the truth. Maybe she was right, but that didn’t mean you didn’t hate it.

“I’ve seen the way you look at him, Y/N. I know that you cared about him before this. All I’m saying is…don’t let something bad ruin something good. I know what it’s like to think your trauma defines you. To feel like you’ll never get past what he did to you. But if you let him stop you from doing what makes you happy, he’s still winning.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” you spat. “You have a husband and 2 sons who love you that you go home to. You have a life and a family and friends.”

“You have friends too. You’re not alone in this. We love you. All of us, not just Spence. Just…don’t stop yourself from being happy just because you’re afraid.”

You took a deep breath. Willed yourself to relax, to listen to her words. You knew that she did know something of what you had gone through, had endured her own torture over the years. Unbidden, an image of Spencer smiling at you, flipping pancakes over your stove popped into your head, and you felt that increasingly familiar jump in your chest.

“What if he can’t love me like this?” You whispered.

“Then the rest of us will.” With that JJ squeezed your hand, poured herself a black coffee and walked away.

You stood there for a moment longer, a bit frozen as you stared down into your cup, something that didn’t escape Spencer’s notice.

“Hey, you okay?” He said, approaching you.

“Remember how this morning I said that we shouldn’t do breakfast anymore because we’re colleagues and it’s weird?”

“I have an eidetic memory, Y/N. Yeah, I think I remember,” he joked, though you could tell it pained him a little bit to do it.

“Do you agree with that? Do you think it’s weird?”

“Well…I’ve never really been what people call normal, so I guess I’m not a good gauge of what’s weird or not,” he said, dodging the question.

“Did you disagree with me when I said it?” You wanted so badly for him to say that he did.

“I…no. I know most colleagues don’t have breakfast together. I mean, not in that sense. Plenty of professional relationships involve various different meetings over food, breakfast being slightly more casual than, say, a lunch meeting-”

“But did you want to do it again anyway?” You interrupted.

He paused to think, chewing on his lip nervously.

“Yeah. Yeah, I did. It was nice.”

“It was, wasn’t it?” You smiled at him.

“You…you thought it was nice too?” His doe eyes went wide with surprise.

“Yeah. Can I uh…can we take this somewhere a little less crowded?” Your eyes darted around the bullpen.

“Uh, yeah,” Spencer said, his voice doing that nervous thing where it jumped up an octave, making you hide a smile behind your hand. “I think Garcia’s office might be available?”

“If it isn’t I’m sure she’ll make it available. She owes me a favor since I let her eat all my Red Vines.”

“Do you even like Red Vines?” Spencer asked.

“That’s for me to know and Penelope Garcia never to find out,” you said, setting a quick pace towards her office.

Spencer had no trouble keeping up, his long legs tripping over themselves less than usual as he followed you. His body could never seem to decide whether it was going to have the grace of a gazelle or the clumsiness of a newborn foal, but today he strode with purpose across the less than pristine tiles of the Quantico floors.

You threw open the door to Garcia’s office without ceremony.

“Garcia we’re appropriating your office, leave now and do not breathe a word of this to anyone or I swear I will steal all of your candy until the end of time and also tell Hotch about that thing you texted me last week.”

Garcia froze in her desk chair. “You wouldn’t. Not the thing!”

“Yes. The thing. Now get out!” You gave her a stern look, then softened. “Please.”

“Alright, alright, it’s all yours. Just be quick about it why don’t you?” She poked her head back through the door even as she was closing it, neon headband a glaring indicator of her continued presence. “Oh, and also? I knew it!”

You could hear her cheering as she closed the door, and you groaned.

“So…you wanted to talk?” Spencer prompted.

“Ummm…yes.” You looked up at him, suddenly regretting your impulsive urge to tell him anything.

What had you been thinking?

He stepped closer to you, and for a minute your heart beat far faster than could possibly be healthy before he sat down in Garcia’s desk chair. The light of the computer monitor glinted off of his hair, and you got the overwhelming urge, not for the first time, to run your fingers through it. Taking this under consideration, you realized JJ was right. This was not a new thing. Truth be told you had been attracted to Spencer for forever and a day, you had just been…afraid. But if you could survive a near-death experience you could survive a little rejection, right?

“I’m going to say some very crazy things now very fast and I want you to listen before I lose my nerve. The truth is I was so nervous this morning because I was trying really, really hard not to kiss you and I was still definitely thinking about doing it. You have this like, aura about you, do you know that? Like, “hello, yes, I’m your friendly neighborhood sexy genius here to make your life harder by not only being smart and hot but also, to top it all off, nice!” Which is very rude of you, in case you were wondering. And so like, naturally I’ve had a crush on you since basically I met you, but then last night you were just…so good to me, and you’re just such a genuinely kind person, and it sort of hit me that I never want you not in my life? And then I woke up next to you this morning and I was like, ‘holy crap, I think I’m in love with him,” which I’m sure you realize was a very startling realization for me, and super not allowed with our jobs and everything, so…I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m in love with you and I’m really sorry about it.”

Spencer had been staring up at you with something that resembled awe as you made your way through your rushed confession, but when you finished, he smiled.

“Sorry? Why are you sorry?” He stood from Penelope’s chair, stepping towards where you were leaning against her desk.

“Because that was all kind of fast and uncalled for and I know you don’t feel the same, so this was sort of a really crappy thing to do to you.”

He slipped a finger under your chin, tilting your head up to make you look at him. “How do you know I don’t feel the same?”

You could feel his warm breath on your face, brushing against your lips, and you fought the urge to kiss him once again.

“I just…assumed?”

“Well, you assumed wrong, because the second I realized there was a chance you might not be in my life because some psycho took you away, I also realized that I never wanted you not to be in my life. I wish I could explain it better, but I’ve never been very good with words that didn’t involve statistics or oddly specific information. You like Jane Austen, right?”

He knew, of course, that you did, because he knew everything you had ever told him about you. You nodded anyway though.

“’I cannot make speeches, Emma…If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.’”

You kissed him then, unable to resist it. Sunk your fingers into the twining grasp of his curls and tasted him, breath wild and heart running rampant. His hands wrapped around your waist dug into your hips and pulled you flush against him, where you stayed even after you broke off the kiss.

“Maybe it makes me selfish, but I want as much of this as I can get,” he whispered, paraphrasing his words from earlier.

“Okay,” you breathed, indulging your earlier thoughts. “Just kiss me, and I’ll forget everything. I’ll forgive you for every selfish sin you’ve ever committed if we can make this one of them.”

He did, kissing you hard and heavy, something frenzied to the way he held you like any moment now, something would try to rip you away.

“That’s what I wanted to say,” you murmured against his lips. “This morning, when you said that. That’s what I wanted to say.”

“I wish you had. Then I could have had this sooner.” His grip on you loosened, allowing him to pull away to smile softly at you.

“Yes, but we never would have made it out of my apartment,” you said casually, before slipping out of his grasp and out of Garcia’s office, a smug little grin on your face.

Spencer was left to watch you walk away, looking like the cat that ate the canary. It was going to be a long workday.

“In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.” ― Jane Austen

#criminal minds #spencer reid #dr. spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fic #spencer reid series #spencer reid oneshot #matthew gray gubler #mgg #jennifer jareau #criminal minds fic #absence of good #AoG #spencer reid imagine #david rossi #derek morgan #penelope garcia #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss

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velmalav · 4 years

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if you’re too shy (let me know) {h.s.}

warnings: nsfw mentions, swearing, pretty damn sexual i’m not sorry

synopsis: inspired by the lyrics of the 1975 song of the same name. you’re a cam girl and harry can’t get enough.

word count: 3k+

Insanity; doing the same thing and expecting a different result. I’d heard this definition so many times, throughout so many years of my life in so many different forms, and not once did I think twice about it. It was just a word and a definition and it didn’t apply to my life at all.

Not once did I think twice about it.

But tonight, yeah, maybe I will.

---

I met you just like most people meet their lovers nowadays – the internet. But in the way Jason met his wife of three years Heather on Tinder, I met you through a cam site. Yeah, I know, it’s not the most romantic thing in the world, and I probably should’ve saw the red flags right then and there, but God knows that’s never how stories like this go.

My friend, Cody – well, more like just a coworker that I have drinks with now and again – sent me a link to the site months back. On Valentine’s Day. As a joke. And I simply rolled my eyes and dragged it into the trash, reassuring myself I “never needed to stoop that low to get off.”

I guess you can tell where my feelings are on that now because three months later, in an effort to distract myself from the overflowing regret of a miserable three week relationship, I took a dive into my trash folder.

You were the fourth one I clicked on. Pretty eyes, suggestive smile, your name seemed attractive enough. But it was your voice that did it for me. It was hollow, pretentious, but smooth. Every word had me on the edge of my seat and my pulse racing for more. And I swear you knew – knew that I was sweating every time you curled her lips into a smile or moistened them between words. I can’t lie – I’d never spent so much money on anything in my life. I was hooked.

You’d go live every Thursday night at 7 pm. I never missed a show. I was never left unsatisfied. It went on like this for weeks, maybe even a few months, before things really started to take a turn.

---

Cody and I took a business trip down South one week – the first week I missed a show. It was a seven hour trip there and back, and we just happened to leave on a Thursday morning. We arrived at our shitty hotel for the next few days MINUTES after your show would have ended and by God was I frustrated. Every missed turn, every piss stop, every inconvenience kept circling my mind in rage. I blamed Cody and all I wanted was to try and forget about you for the night. Cody suggested what any 25 year old business major would – the cheapest, filthiest bar on the strip and asap.

“Shit’s packed. How are we going to find a seat?” Cody had asked out loud to a sea of empty tables. Three times.

Three times before we entered an even rustier kind of bar. I mean, hey, it was our last resort, and looking back, there was no way in hell I’d expected what was coming for me in there.

After a couple hours huddled at a booth in the back corner, seven beers down, the front door bell chimed for the hundredth time. I glanced up to see a very familiar set of eyes flouncing inside, an even more familiar, sweat-inducing smile set on your mouth.

There was no fucking way. And yet there was, because you were there in front of me. Cam girl, approaching with a sway in your step, clueless to the lanky, curly-headed man boring a hole through you.

“Bro, you good?” Cody waved a hand in front of my face, the other knocking his bottle of beer onto the table loudly. You turned at the noise, pretty eyes softening at the sight of me.

I didn’t even answer him. I stood up, closing the large gap between us for a much smaller one. Cody said something but you’d be crazy to think I heard him with you staring at me like that.

“You need this booth?” I muttered, suddenly realizing just how pathetic and meek my voice sounded. But you didn’t skip a beat, coy smile on your mouth as it opened.

“Oh, god, could I? Didn’t think this place would be so busy. It never is.”

So you frequent this bar. Yet I could never see you here on a casual occasion, or any for that matter. But the more I eyed you, the more it suited you. Anything could’ve suited you.

“All yours,” I breathed, finally finding my deep, raspy voice. Your eyes perked up at the words, but you didn’t move for a few beats.

You went to say something, but caught sight of Cody. Fucking Cody.

“I would invite you to join me, but I wouldn’t want to be rude to your friend,” you murmured breathily, lips centimeters from my face as you passed me to approach the booth. Just like I had, Cody stumbled from it, extending his hand to you.

You wave his hand off as if you’re shy and murmur a, “No need,” before you turn back to me, and the cute, fragile front you’d just put on for Cody vanishes underneath the limelight of you and me. “I’ll see you around.”

---

I honestly cannot stress how fucking quickly I ditched Cody that night. I told him I was feeling under the weather and that I was going to head back to the hotel room, and as soon as he tucked in for the night also, I went straight back to you. Who the hell knows when I’ll get back around this area, and I need more than what you’d given me.

You were surprised that I’d returned. Your eyes didn’t hold the same flirtation, they were cold and only cold when they were on me. I tried playing the game – assuming it was a game – but after an hour of eyeing you from the bar, I realized what you were all about.

I didn’t need to beg you. In fact, I didn’t want to, for your sake. God only knows how many of guys like me have done this to you, desperately waited for your long-awaited, never to be heard call. As much as I wanted that same tension as before, I’d rather have the memory than be labeled as a creep.

I turned to leave, disappointed. I shove my hands into my jacket pockets and step out into the cool air. I watch my breath as I trudge back to the car, and God does this feel like shit.

“Must be later, I guess,” your voice calls, and it’s finally it’s not long-awaited or nonexistent. You’re here and jogging in your little heels to catch up with me.

“Must be,” I plainly remark. I don’t understand you, and I’m expecting another short-lived memory I can use as an exaggerated fantasy tonight. “You need a ride or something?”

“Something,” you smile, teeth and all. “Definitely something.”

I go to send yet another signal that I’m annoyed when I catch the way you’re looking at me. Those same flirtatious eyes. And you’re almost giddy, hands in your pockets, cheeks red. You know I’m down for you and you’re just waiting for the green light.

In my confusion and realization, I stutter out a breathy laugh and touch my fingers to my stubble. That’s really all it takes for you to click forward on your little heels, closing the gap until we’re uncomfortably close. “I have to tell you something.”

“Took you long enough,” I repeat my nervous laugh.

You dip into me until your chin molds into the space between my ear and my shoulder. No hands, all lips as they graze the skin under my ear. Even in those heels I’ve got so much height on you. “I’d like you so much more if you took off your clothes right now.”

I tip back just enough to see your expression, and to my surprise your coy smile is gone. The coldness is back yet I’m burning up staring at you. I’m reminded of the way you touch yourself on the live cams and my heart starts racing and racing until I swear you can hear it against the wind and your inner thoughts.

You catch my Adam’s apple bob before I sputter out something pathetic. You snake your sweaty hands onto my face and attach our mouths together.

It’s a blur between the groping and angry kissing from outside to the back of my car, but we find our way. I imagine all of the weeks I spent pining after you and your body as my hands feel every square inch of it. I soak you in like the sand absorbs the tide, every kiss and bite and grasp burned into me. And I don’t know if its habit to moan so loud, so pornographically from your live shows, but you do and it among many other things sends me over the edge.

Even after its over and I’m pining over these moments in my hotel room in the early hours, I see flashes of your fingernails digging into the leather seats of Cody’s SUV and the pressure of hot skin against me. Your half-lidded eyes, your open mouth. I thrive off of it for days after and then it’s almost like it was a fantasy, a sick fantasy I’d created in absence of that goddamn missed week. Because every passing day you’re not here to remind me of the leather seats and the heat and your cold expression, it’s a missed week.

---

After the night, after the business trip, after you slide me your phone number on the second night I see you, I still watch you every Thursday night. I can’t help myself, you’re addicting and I doubt you’d mind – the amount of money you make from just me is quite ridiculous. I doubt I’ll see you for a long time, if ever again, and things start to fall back into the sad, Thursday night and office work week routine and I miss you.

And I thought – since I have a lot of time to think these days – about it; I don’t just miss you because of that night. I miss you for all of the other reasons I can think of. Most of it sexual, but in the midst of it is beauty and arrogance and a livewire strapped to a pole. You bring all of those things into my life, and now I’m desperate for more.

So I call you one night, digressing from wanting you in every way possible to wanting to hear you moan in my ear again. I know it’s strange and pathetic, but you make me nervous and no woman has that effect on me.

You answer your phone with that same breathy voice. I notice the lilt, the sensuality of the way you respond and I know you know something you couldn’t possibly – I’m naked and at your every whim. It’s nearing 9pm and your Thursday night isn’t up.

It’s not much more but it’s also everything, what you give me over the phone. And I guess cams would be more skin, more visuals, but with you I don’t need that. Your tongue speaking words meant for just me is enough to send me over the edge a thousand times, and the way you make me feel I swear I do. Topple, again and again and again.

“I miss you,” you say when it’s over. A phrase I couldn’t fathom leaving your mouth. You’re a one type girl and I’m trying to figure out why this night is so three dimensional.

I want to reciprocate and make sure you know what you’re doing to me, but I say nothing. Because as much as I want to, you’re a one type girl. And a one type girl seeks a many type guy only to destroy him later. And boy am I aware of later.

---

I can feel your grasp on me one particular afternoon. The office is suffocating and you’re the only thing I’ve been able to think about all day. Over the course of five months I’ve figured out the inevitable – I think I love you. And it’s a tough call and an even tougher call five minutes later in the office bathroom when you beg me to come see you.

And I’d do anything for you now, and my tongue won’t hold back for long. I’m so close to spilling how I feel for you and the second I roll into your city I know the floodgates are going to open.

The drive is excruciating and the thought of losing all of those hours of work is even less so the closer I get to you. It’s so depressing, the thought of falling for a cam girl after one physical night and countless virtual ones, most of which you don’t even know about.

“I think I love you,” is on my mind as I fill up my tank halfway through and again when I see the city limits sign. I know you’re giddy when my phone blings and the sun is going down and I can feel my pulse beginning to quicken already.

And then you’re in my car and not Cody’s but it feels all the same. You don’t hesitate to get the ball rolling. I grab your feverish hands and gently nudge you back into the front seat. Your rosy cheeks burn more, cold stare freezing over. “What’s this about?”

“It’s fucking freezing in here.”

“I can warm us up. Just give it a second-“

“Wouldn’t you rather be more comfortable in a bed?”

You stare, same ivy flashes across your face. You’re impatient and stubborn, but I don’t care. My leather seats don’t recline like Cody’s do and the windows aren’t tinted.

The only place you’ll consider going to is a grimey motel on the west side of your city. It sticks out like a sore thumb in consideration of the other tall, modern buildings around it. Why would you take me there? I hardly have time to ask because your timer is running out.

The motel worker stares at us, a match you’d all but expect, especially at a place like this. God, we look like a CEO and his mistress and I can’t help but inch away from you. “Sorry, we’re closed today.”

“But you’re here,” you blanch, rosy cheeks reddening. You’re not shitty to her but you sure are impatient.

“Yeah, I know,” the worker spits. “But there’s an active crime scene in one of the rooms and I was told not to rent out any other rooms for the day.”

“That’s fucking stu-“

“Fine. Fucking fine,” I interrupt you, inching back towards you to wrap my arms around your waist. “Let’s just settle for the car,” I murmur into your ear. And I’m sad because I wanted a bed regardless of the dodgy stains and the noisy springs. I wanted to eye you from the foot of the bed as I mouth the words I’ve been waiting to say for months.

---

“I love you,” echoes into the frosted foyer of your apartment building after another escapade in my tight fit Honda. My hands fidget, eyes shift around your face.

And then you laugh. “You don’t know me.”

---

I don’t know you and yet I think I love you. I take the laughter in stride and watch you go with the coldness I always knew you were capable of. My heart hurts, but I still can’t scratch my itch for you.

So I call you days later. Tell you I lied, that I got carried away and I wanted to see your reaction and genuinely every excuse I could muster. You laugh again, but warmly this time, and assure that you already knew all of these things. And just like that, things go back to normal.

I wish I could tell you that’s how it went. That I simply took the quick release every Thursday night and casual random phone sex, but God did I hate that I lied and I hate that you won’t let me feel the things I feel for you. I let you fuck me over again, once every few months. A trip I never regret until it’s Thursday night and you’re naked and acting like you want every other man but me.

And I say it again. Every trip I say it and you laugh and mention that I’m insane. And I stare at you and and lie again and then shake my head and tell you what I feel is right. And you laugh.

Because it doesn’t matter. It’ll all end up the same anyway.

---

A year in and I hate myself and I think I hate you. Things can’t go back to normal, as if there ever was one. The phone sex is weird now, and I don’t call. I skip Thursday nights every other week and even on the phones I sit in on, I hate every second of my release. It’s not real anymore. It never was.

A year on the dot and I feel my phone vibrate for the thousandth time as I cruise down the highway. My pulse is racing and I’ve still got an hour to go. I’m almost to you, and I swear this time it’ll be different.

“I love you,” I think to myself. I know it’s true, and I know this time she’ll say it back. No woman in their right mind wouldn’t after so many months of what we have.

A year since I clicked on your cam and now seeing you online makes my stomach flip. A year since I felt your cold stare across the bar and your hands first grabbing my face for a first kiss.

A year since I first told myself I wanted you more and more. A blossoming thought of love that I thought over and over as I drove into you.

A year of the same build up and break down. But I swear this time will be different. It has to be.

I never thought much about the definition of insanity.

But, yeah, maybe tonight I will.

#harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles fic #apseventy #the 1975

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artificialqueens · 5 years

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malamente part 1 (branjie) - evan

AN: Hello hello hello! I’m back again, this time attempting a multi chapter fic. I am SO EXCITED to share this all with you, as I work through my favorite theme in any media: women who bond over killing their abusers. This fic has a million inspirations, and if you’re curious, find me @formercongressman ! Big heads up to check the tags. It’s gonna be a heavy one, but also full of redemption and righteous revenge and healing. Take care of yourselves! If I should be tagging differently in the future, please let me know. A huge thanks to Meggie for beta-ing, and to everyone on the Branjie fic discord for being my eternal cheerleaders <3 <3 <3 love yall!!

In which Brooke might have killed her husband and Vanessa brings tequila.

–

So, there’s a dead body in her kitchen.

Brooke pops a window and sticks her head outside. It’s October, and the crisp evening air soothes the heat she feels building on her neck. She’s perched on a stool, breathing deep, surprisingly calm with all things considered.

She watches the sunset over the tree-lined street. She waits. For what, she’s not sure.

It’s her husband. Jason. He’s crumpled on the kitchen floor. His arm is extended toward her, rigor mortis locking his hand in a pointed finger. “You fucking bitch,” was the last thing he somehow muttered through his rapidly closing throat. And that was it. Finally, that was it. She keeps expecting him to move, now, to jump up and swing at her like any old night, but he is completely still. Turned to stone.

(Perhaps she had known he was deathly allergic to figs. Perhaps she had forgotten to label her freshly baked pastries she stored in the fridge. But, she thinks, when you’ve got a seasonal fruit allergy and a penchant for gluttony, at the end of the day it’s your own damn fault. Brooke doesn’t feel guilty. She’ll sleep tonight.)

There’s no blood, which is good. She’s wearing white shoes. This is a thought she allows to cross her mind.

The sun goes down and she’s not sure how long she’s been sitting there. Finally she pulls out her phone. She’s never had an excuse to use the emergency call button before, but she sure does now.

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“Hello, there’s been an accident.” Fuck. She knows her voice sounds to metered, too steady. How should she sound right now? She breathes in, feels it catch in her throat. “I think? My husband? Is dead?” Better.

“Ma’am, have you checked his pulse? Do you know if he is breathing?”

“No, he’s, um…” She stands up and kicks at his extended hand. Rock solid. “He’s cold.”

They ask for an address, and she gives it to them. Then the phone call is over, she’s tapping her nails on the hard plastic of her phone case, and waiting, again.

Brooke knows there will be questions. She’ll say she was in the bath when he came home from work at the bank, treating herself to a long, languid Friday afternoon, and that she didn’t know anything was wrong until she found him an hour or so later. The house is huge, and she never would have heard anything from up in the bathroom. In actuality, of course, she had been waiting in the living room with a tattered copy of an Ibsen play in her hands, hoping he’d find the pastries, anticipating the wheezing, the choking, and the thud of his body against the tile.

Now she sees the ambulance lights. Then she hears the knock at her door.

A cool rush surges through her. It’s relief. That’s when she starts crying.

–

Brooke is grateful, at least, for Nina, who knows about 90% of what is going on.

Nina knows that Jason would hit her. Brooke had spent a few nights at Nina’s place, waiting for a fight to blow over, waiting for an insincere apology, and so on and so on. Nina would order Chinese food and mix her a drink and set her hand so gently on Brooke’s arm. And when Brooke would go back the next day, Nina would nod and say, “Alright, sweetie, I’m always here.” That woman had more patience in her body than the rest of the neighborhood combined.

Nina knows that Brooke wanted Jason dead. Brooke should have left, could have left, yes, but at 32 with no degree or practical work experience other than schmoozing at galas and fundraisers and two years with a ballet company in South Africa, leaving Jason wasn’t something she could justify. Plus there was so much money, he was gone a lot, and she had her own herb garden. Jason dying was the best case scenario.

Nina doesn’t know about the figs, and Brooke does not intend to tell her.

But 90% of the story is enough for Nina to be exactly what Brooke needs at the funeral. Brooke is not the distraught, whimpering widow that Jason’s family is expecting, and Nina goes above and beyond. She steers away Jason’s elderly mother, she holds Brooke while she pretends to cry, and she nods supportively while Brooke delivers a not-at-all-heartfelt eulogy that she looked up online the night before. Nina, in short, makes it easier to play along.

But there’s only so much she can do. It’s 3 p.m. and they’re all still at the graveyard. Jason’s body is finally, finally in the ground, but apparently that doesn’t mean that anyone is allowed to go home yet. Jason’s sister has them all sitting in a circle (on the ground, in this dress) and they’re going around and saying one nice memory about Jason.

When it comes around to Brooke, she can’t think of a single thing to say. Maybe, if she tried, she could dredge up a memory from before they got married, before he started drinking so much, when there were vacations and gifts and lavish dinners with exciting people. Those times were happy, right? But all she can think about right now is the way his eyes would narrow before he threw a glass, his pointed finger, the sound of his body hitting the kitchen tile. That last one was happy.

“Brooke?”

It’s Nina’s voice. Brooke feels too many eyes on her, and she knows she doesn’t have the filter to fake it right now, so she runs away.

“Excuse me for a moment.”

People make way for her, and she notes the pitying faces. It’s not something she usually likes to see, but it’s better, definitely, that they think what they think.

“Let’s give her some space. She’s going through a lot.” Nina’s voice again. She owes that woman the first-born child she’ll never have.

The chill, October air hits her again as she finds an exit off the back patio of the funeral home. The graveyard stretches out before her like an invitation, which she accepts. She takes off directionless. For a moment she worries her heels might sink into the earth as she crosses, but they don’t. She wonders how much harder it is to dig graves after the first frost.

She spots a mausoleum tucked back in the corner of the small graveyard under an old oak tree. It’s made of worn stone, and has a small bench she spots where the light filters in through the trees. She sits down, leans into the cold wall behind her, lets it hold her straight and upright.

It’s hard to hold a secret.

Brooke can lie for days. She can put on a happy face and lilt through a fundraiser as long as she can lock eyes with Nina across the room and know she’ll have someone to commiserate with after it’s over. This already feels different. She feels like she’s waiting for the ball to drop, for some feeling of remorse to settle in, for a new kind of loneliness to catch up with her just when she thought she might get to start her life again.

She wonders for a moment about what tomorrow will look like. Casseroles and strangers’ cookware piling up in her sink, that’s for sure. A deposit in her bank account, eventually. Shopping with Nina, a case of red wine, nice things. But what then?

Maybe, as a twisted joke, she could open a bakery. She’d sell fig pastries year round.

She’s sure she looks a wreck, and opens her phone camera to try and fix her smudged makeup. At least she looks sad, with one good trail of mascara running down her face from the few tears she had managed to squeeze out. She feels her pocket for tissues and realizes that she’s out, and tries to smudge the tear track away with her finger. It’s not a very successful endeavor, but all she needs to do for now is look just put together enough.

She’s too focused on that to hear the click of another pair of heels against the marble base of the mausoleum until a girl with hair in long, dark waves comes spinning around the corner and nearly topples onto Brooke.

“Oh shit, sorry. I didn’t see you there.” The girl is small, even in heels, and she’s wearing a long black gown and lace gloves that make even Brooke feel pedestrian. Her voice sounds like the crunch of a car rolling slowly down a gravel road. She rights herself, watching Brooke. “Is it wrong to swear in a graveyard? My bad.”

“I don’t fucking know,” Brooke responds instinctually, and then cracks her first authentic smile in three days.

The girl smiles too. It fills her whole face, and she practically glimmers in jarring contrast to the sullen and somber graveyard behind her. She sits down next to Brooke on the bench, carefully.

“Do you want a tissue? Or some tequila?”

“Both, actually, would be wonderful.”

The girl pulls a packet of tissues and a flask from her sleek black clutch. Brooke graciously accepts the flask, takes too big of a swig, and winces as it burns. It tastes like gasoline with notes of vanilla, but Brooke is grateful for anything at this point.

She holds out her hand for a tissue, but the stranger pushes it away. “Let me,” she says, and starts to dab the tissue gently around Brooke’s eye, precise and conscious of her makeup. She’s gentle. “Lemme guess, annoying coworker? Batshit aunt? Your yoga instructor?”

Brooke chuckles. “Husband.”

The girl pulls back, and looks at her quizzically. “No. These aren’t real tears.”

“They are.”

“I’m good at telling when people are lying. So don’t. I can tell you’ve been crying too pretty for these to be real.”

Brooke doesn’t know what to say to that. “I don’t know what to say to that.”

The girl gives her a look, and then goes back to blotting around the corner of her eye. “Was he an asshole?” she asks. Brooke has to hand it to her, this girl is bold. Brooke bites her lip, hesitates. “My boyfriend’s an asshole,” she adds. “So I know.”

There’s a lot unsaid, but she knows too. “Yeah, he was an asshole,” Brooke yields.

“I won’t say good riddance-”

“You could.”

“Good riddance.”

Brooke sits with that for a moment, and it feels good. Too good, maybe.

“I think I killed him,” Brooke says out loud for the first time. She’s hit with another cool rush. Relief.

“Oh.” The girl pauses for a nanosecond before switching to the other side of Brooke’s face. “You think?”

“It’s a grey area.”

Brooke isn’t sure what she was expecting at this admission, but it certainly wasn’t nonchalance. This beautiful, bold, and bright stranger nods as if Brooke had just said she likes the color red. And it’s everything she needs. So Brooke doesn’t pour her heart out. Rather, she hands a piece of her demons to this small and radiant person and remains grateful for the weight off her shoulders.

“There.” The girl finishes up with Brooke’s makeup, her thumb gliding lightly over Brooke’s cheek. “You’re pretty again.”

“I didn’t even ask about you,” Brooke realizes aloud. Unless this stranger is a particularly fashionable twenty-something who haunts the local graveyard during the day (or, perhaps more excitingly, a ghost who haunts it a bit more literally) she’s probably here for a funeral as well.

“Oh.” The girl casts her eyes to the ground for a moment “I’m here for my abuelita. Good woman, full life. Got to sit with her and hold her hand on the last day. So really, I’m all good.” The smile is back, smaller, but sincere.

“But you’re drinking?”

“My sixteen year old cousin brought it. Don’t know where she got it, but she’s a smart bitch. Had to confiscate it.” She grins and takes a long swig from the flask, and hands it back to Brooke. “Plus, abuela would have wanted a party.”

“What’s your name?”

“Vanessa.”

“I’m Brooke Lynn. Brooke.”

“It’s good to meet you, Brooke.”

Brooke raises the flask in the air. “To your abuela.”

“To abuelita! And to…” Vanessa hesitates. “Not your husband. To you. Whatever the fucked up circumstances, to you.”

Brooke locks eyes with Vanessa for a moment that lasts maybe half a second, maybe a full minute, she can’t be sure. She bookmarks it as a moment when she feels safe, a moment when she actually feels okay. She watches intently as the corner of Vanessa’s mouth turns up in a smile before she kicks back the flask again. Vanessa follows suit.

“I feel like I should be thanking you,” Brooke says as she winces through the taste.

“For my cousin’s cheap tequila? No need.”

“No, more for… I don’t know, listening. You’re easier to talk to than most people.”

“I like secrets. Don’t worry.” Vanessa places her hand on Brooke’s knee, and she could swear that she feels an actual electric spark travel down her leg as Vanessa presses her thumb into her skin. Or maybe she just imagined it.

Vanessa stands, stuffs her things back into her bag, and squares her shoulders. “I’m glad I met you, Brooke. Don’t have too much fun in there, okay?”

“Okay,” Brooke says, and surprises herself with the sweetness behind her own laugh.

Vanessa turns to leave, and for a quick flash, Brooke thinks about following her, reaching for her arm, asking for her number. But all too quickly Vanessa is out of sight, out of earshot, outside Brooke’s world and back in her own.

“Thank you,” Brooke says softly, to no one but the marble floor.

AN: Hello hello hello! I’m back again, this time attempting a multi chapter fic. I am SO EXCITED to share this all with you, as I work through my favorite theme in any media: women who bond over killing their abusers. This fic has a million inspirations, and if you’re curious, find me @formercongressman! Big heads up to check the tags. It’s gonna be a heavy one, but also full of redemption and righteous revenge and healing. Take care of yourselves! If I should be tagging differently in the future, please let me know. A huge thanks to Meggie for beta-ing, and to everyone on the Branjie fic discord for being my eternal cheerleaders <3 <3 <3 love yall!!

In which Brooke might have killed her husband and Vanessa brings tequila.

–

So, there’s a dead body in her kitchen.

She watches the sunset over the tree-lined street. She waits. For what, she’s not sure.

There’s no blood, which is good. She’s wearing white shoes. This is a thought she allows to cross her mind.

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“Ma’am, have you checked his pulse? Do you know if he is breathing?”

“No, he’s, um…” She stands up and kicks at his extended hand. Rock solid. “He’s cold.”

They ask for an address, and she gives it to them. Then the phone call is over, she’s tapping her nails on the hard plastic of her phone case, and waiting, again.

Now she sees the ambulance lights. Then she hears the knock at her door.

A cool rush surges through her. It’s relief. That’s when she starts crying.

–

Brooke is grateful, at least, for Nina, who knows about 90% of what is going on.

Nina doesn’t know about the figs, and Brooke does not intend to tell her.

“Brooke?”

It’s Nina’s voice. Brooke feels too many eyes on her, and she knows she doesn’t have the filter to fake it right now, so she runs away.

“Excuse me for a moment.”

People make way for her, and she notes the pitying faces. It’s not something she usually likes to see, but it’s better, definitely, that they think what they think.

“Let’s give her some space. She’s going through a lot.” Nina’s voice again. She owes that woman the first-born child she’ll never have.

It’s hard to hold a secret.

Maybe, as a twisted joke, she could open a bakery. She’d sell fig pastries year round.

“I don’t fucking know,” Brooke responds instinctually, and then cracks her first authentic smile in three days.

The girl smiles too. It fills her whole face, and she practically glimmers in jarring contrast to the sullen and somber graveyard behind her. She sits down next to Brooke on the bench, carefully.

“Do you want a tissue? Or some tequila?”

“Both, actually, would be wonderful.”

Brooke chuckles. “Husband.”

The girl pulls back, and looks at her quizzically. “No. These aren’t real tears.”

“They are.”

“I’m good at telling when people are lying. So don’t. I can tell you’ve been crying too pretty for these to be real.”

Brooke doesn’t know what to say to that. “I don’t know what to say to that.”

There’s a lot unsaid, but she knows too. “Yeah, he was an asshole,” Brooke yields.

“I won’t say good riddance-”

“You could.”

“Good riddance.”

Brooke sits with that for a moment, and it feels good. Too good, maybe.

“I think I killed him,” Brooke says out loud for the first time. She’s hit with another cool rush. Relief.

“Oh.” The girl pauses for a nanosecond before switching to the other side of Brooke’s face. “You think?”

“It’s a grey area.”

“There.” The girl finishes up with Brooke’s makeup, her thumb gliding lightly over Brooke’s cheek. “You’re pretty again.”

“But you’re drinking?”

“What’s your name?”

“Vanessa.”

“I’m Brooke Lynn. Brooke.”

“It’s good to meet you, Brooke.”

Brooke raises the flask in the air. “To your abuela.”

“To abuelita! And to…” Vanessa hesitates. “Not your husband. To you. Whatever the fucked up circumstances, to you.”

“I feel like I should be thanking you,” Brooke says as she winces through the taste.

“For my cousin’s cheap tequila? No need.”

“No, more for… I don’t know, listening. You’re easier to talk to than most people.”

Vanessa stands, stuffs her things back into her bag, and squares her shoulders. “I’m glad I met you, Brooke. Don’t have too much fun in there, okay?”

“Okay,” Brooke says, and surprises herself with the sweetness behind her own laugh.

“Thank you,” Brooke says softly, to no one but the marble floor.

#rpdr fanfiction #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #nina west #branjie #lesbian au #angst #hurt/comfort #malamente #evan #tw domestic violence #tw murder #concrit welcome #submission

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chlostertalks · 5 years

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Big 3 at NABJ

This time last week, I was gearing up for a fun afternoon during the National Association of Black Journalists (NABJ) Convention in Miami, Florida.

Okay, it was in Aventura. It was expensive getting around to my favorite spots in South Florida after workshops, but it was still a lot of fun.

My favorite panel was "Big 3 and Diversity with Ice Cube" August 9th.

In addition to the co-founder of the league and critically-acclaimed artist, the panel featured CubeVision COO and Big 3 Co-Founder Jeff Kwatinetz, Senior ESPN/Undefeated Writer Marc Spears, Atlantic Staff Writer Jemele Hill, and Big 3 Coach and Basketball Hall of Famer Nancy Leiberman. The panel was across the street from the convention at AMC Theatres in Aventura Mall.

The panel was about the difference between diversity and inclusion, how the Big 3 approaches both topics, and how the Big 3 looks to disrupt the sports and sports media spaces.

L-R: Jeff Kwatinetz, Nancy Lieberman, Marc Spears, Ice Cube, Jemele Hill. Personal photo.

Since 2017, the Big 3 has been the premier 3-on-3 basketball league in the United States. It features former NBA players in the most entertaining traveling basketball games around. The league travels to 18 cities during the regular season, and between three and six games are played on one half-court in each city. One of their biggest innovations on the court is the four-point space. There are three circles behind the three-point line where a shot can count for four points.

The Big 3 Court. FOX Sports 1340 AM.

Ice Cube wants the smartest individuals to join his staff, regardless of background. It's why Amy Trask left the Raiders for this league after 17 years. It's why Clyde Drexler is commissioner. It's why Lisa Leslie and Julius Erving are among the head coaches in the league. More importantly, all coaches are equally paid.

Cube and Kwatinetz's talks of disrupting spaces was the most fascinating portion of the discussion to me. Kwatinetz brought up the NFL owners' depositions around Colin Kaepernick, and compared the owners' views to the Big 3's views. "What we're doing is scaring people [because] we are empowering athletes," he said. It reminded me so much of what LeBron James and Kevin Durant are trying to do in media, and what Russell Wilson is trying to do as part-owner of a major professional team.

Kwatientz continued on space disruption, this time in sports media. Concerning morning shows, "there's no one talking about what we need to talk about," he said. "If someone can put out a point of view that disrupts corporate greed, that's dangerous power." He even talked about fellow panelist Jemele Hill, who left ESPN after her relationship with the Worldwide Leader was fractured over her tweets directed at President Trump. "Why didn't another network hire Jemele Hill….It's not always racism; they have to go to the convention and have their friends ask them, 'Why did you hire Jemele Hill? Now I gotta hire my Jemele Hill!'"

By allowing athletes to use their voices and platforms to address social injustices, it ultimately puts owners in an uncomfortable position to either listen to their players and enact change, address their players' concerns in broad strokes, or no longer employ them. As co-founders of a league, Cube and Kwatientz want to enact change as one of the fresh, new leagues in the summer season.

However, it was Nancy Leiberman who truly sold me on the Big 3's mission, and got me excited to go to their event the following day at American Airlines Arena. In terms of diversity and inclusion, she compared the two to being asked to the dance vs. having your date dance with you. "If one African-American gets in, and no one after him gets in, we have failed," she noted. To her, the Big 3 is opening doors to minorities and women beyond the court, and keeping the doors open to include more people in the league in playing, coaching, and managing. She also talked in detail about the human element that she gets to see in her players after the game. Her parting words: "We're building a superteam, and we want you to be a part of it."

I had so many takeaways from the panel. How can I diversify my space? How can other leagues, like the WNBA and NWSL, learn from the Big 3 and disrupt the sports media space? I left the panel energized and full of ideas.

First, though, it was time to return to the American Airlines Arena, home of the Miami HEAT, my first network internship, and the night's Big 3 games. It felt so good to be back in the Arena and to see how far I've come; I went from running around the court, scarfing down popcorn at halftime, and gathering audio in the locker room postgame to editing promotions, commercials, and more for one of the largest media companies on earth.

Outside the HEAT locker room. Fun times in the 305! Personal photos.

Being that my friends, coworkers, and I had press passes, we entered the Arena through the locker room hallway. I actually got to enjoy the walk this time instead of trying to sneak photos as a production intern. I even ran into former HEAT player Willie Reed and his family. He looked so familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it until I reached my seat.

The Big 3 matchups that night were 3-Headed Monsters vs. Enemies, Power vs. Tri-State, and Ghost Ballers vs. Trilogy.

There was a lot of energy in the building, and lots of families. The latter is so because the tickets are so affordable; Ice Cube noted at the panel that they wanted to accommodate working-class people, attracting a fan base that can't always afford tickets to NBA games.

Though the Big 3 has a shot clock, there is no game clock. Instead, the first team to 25 points ends the first half, and the first to 50 points ends the game. In fact, when a team scores at least 46 points, the music becomes more dramatic, and the PA announcer alerts the crowd that it's a "Point Game."

The best game was 2018 champion Power against Tri-State. Nancy Leiberman and Dr. J squared off in a coaching battle. It was cool seeing former LSU Tiger Big Baby Davis on defense, but it was most entertaining when he went against Nate Robinson of Tri-State. The two were the Shrek and Donkey duo on the 2010 Boston Celtics that were points away from winning an 18th NBA championship. Here, though, they were rivals. In Point Game, Robinson broke Big Baby's ankles; Big Baby tried redeeming himself after sliding across the floor, but Robinson already rose to take the shot. Big Baby grabbed him midair, but the shot was good! It was worthy of a SportsCenter Top 10 spot. The crowd erupted, and Robinson and his teammates ran around the floor.

Special thanks to NABJ for making connections like these happen. It's having tangible access to and learning from executives and notable figures that make the conference special.

On the court. Personal photo.

#written work #miami heat #big 3 #power #tri state #ghost ballers #trilogy #3-headed monsters #enemies #ice cube #jemele hill #colin kaepernick #nabj #nabj19

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hrrytomlinson · 7 years

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here are a bunch of AMAZING fics I’ve enjoyed and loved reading throughout the month of august. I recommend that you read these great fics in september, if you haven’t already!! also check out the HL Summer Fic Exchange!

(all fics with a star are my favorites and if there are two stars then it was a favorite favorite)

1. How Far We’ve Come 32k

“This is Harry Styles,” Chiron offers.

He’s beautiful. His eyes are a stunning green, the color of new foliage. The new kid’s limbs are long and lanky—he looks extremely uncomfortable and uncoordinated. Louis internally smirks to himself, guessing the kid probably won’t be too skilled with a sword, or a bow, or anything sharp, most likely. His hair falls to his shoulders in sets of loose, brown curls. The color is rich and luscious, resembling soil so much that it looks like flowers could sprout from his hairline at any moment. But Louis’ eyes are stuck on his soft looking lips, pink as flower petals and slightly parted as his eyes scan the horizon of the camp.

“Welcome to Camp Half-Blood, Harry.”

2. It’ll All Come Up Roses 4k *

Louis was leaning against the railing of the bridge, looking down at the water completely lost in thought when he heard someone approach the bridge from the side that he came from. Glancing up, he noticed Harry walking towards him, hands stuffed deep in his pockets, and seemingly lost in thought. Louis shifted his weight onto his other foot and stood up properly, watching quietly as Harry walked past him. Louis opened his mouth. He wanted to say something to Harry to break the silence, or at least to get him to notice him standing there against the bridge railing - but the words got stuck in Louis’ throat, and he snapped his mouth shut, going back to staring down at the water mindlessly instead. All the while, trying hopelessly to figure out what the fuck he’s doing with his life. Harry kept walking, and soon Louis was once again left alone to his thoughts.

Or the one where Louis really doesn't hate his neighbor who keeps waking him up at the crack of dawn. Ft magic, Liam, Niall, and Zayn barely being mentioned, Harry and his fucking motorcycle, a date and a kiss.

3. Freeze This Moment in a Frame and Stay Like This 5k

Harry (not so) secretly crushes on the cute footie player and fills pages with sketches of him.

4. Wrap You Up In Daisy Chains 10k *

Ten minutes later, an awkward, long-legged, curly-haired, so pale she’s reflective, and so obviously gay-looking Harry Styles is sitting shotgun next to Louis in a bikini, denim cut-offs, and heart-framed sunnies.

Or, Harry and Louis and a too-small bathing suit.

5. Small Doses (Loving You It’s Explosive) 38k

Louis Tomlinson finds himself at Vitality Fitness to try and turn his life around after having left his cheating boyfriend of four years. The gym's owner, Liam, quickly becomes a good friend, but his right hand man is rude and dismissive from the get-go.

Louis and Harry continue to clash all while Harry is trying to move his way up the ranks in Manchester's amateur boxing circuit, but they can't seem to stay away from each other.

6. Some Flowers In Your Hair 23k *

When Louis mentions offhandedly that he’s really been enjoying watching some TV show called Alone, and that the idea of humans surviving without magic in the wilderness fascinates him, he would never have guessed it would land him in a situation like this.

This is supposed to be a friendly camping trip between Louis and Liam, just a couple of bros surviving in the wilderness for bragging rights, not whatever rigmarole that fucker is currently outlining. And certainly not including one Harry Styles, pretentious twat that he is.

What is he getting himself into?

Or, a magical camping AU in which Louis is jealous of Harry's magic, Liam's a little too enthusiastic about surviving in the wilderness, and Niall might have misunderstood the rules.

7. We’ll Be Seamless 52k **

Green reblogged an old photo of himself. It was from back in October, a Halloween special. A pulse shot all the way through Louis because this photo was his absolute favourite, and it had taken the rest of the year for him to wean himself off of it.

Green was on his knees, arms stretched out in front of him with his fingertips digging into the surface of his bed. He was wearing a pair of cat ears on his head, his curls falling forward. His back was arched, and in the foreground of the picture, Green’s bum was high in the air, a long, black cat tail sitting neatly between his cheeks.

Louis spends all his spare time scrolling arty nude blogs on Tumblr but amongst them all, Green is his favourite.

8. Chasing Empty Spaces 79k **

The year is 1934 and Harry Styles was to inherent the largest tobacco firm in the south. His parents have picked out the “perfect” girl for him to marry and he has the privilege of receiving the highest education possible. The problem was, Harry hadn’t realized he didn’t actually want any part of that future until he met a mechanic named, Louis Tomlinson.

9. It Had To Be You 45k **

A When Harry Met Sally AU.

Harry and Louis are strangers who share the drive from Chicago to NYC after college. They don't have anything in common, don't get along, and at the end of their trip, they're both glad to say goodbye. During a chance meeting five years later, they find that nothing has changed, and they part ways expecting never to see each other again. Ten years after their first meeting, Louis and Harry meet once again, but this time they become friends. Eventually, things get complicated.

10. Perfect Sky 11k

Deep, deep down, Louis knows Niall hadn’t meant to do this. He knows that this really was a last minute conundrum Louis had found himself in. Louis could’ve muddled the dates just as easily as Niall could have misremembered them. This hurts for other, more difficult reasons.

This hurts because it was supposed to be Louis’ honeymoon.

Louis meets Marcel at the lowest point of his life. A few poorly timed jokes, and a cigarette (or twelve) later, Louis starts to think love’s not a sham after all.

11. Magic Everywhere We Go 19k

Fifteen years after first meeting Louis at a mutual friend’s birthday party, Harry is just as in love with his husband as he was on their wedding day. And with the birth of each new child, Harry seems to have only grown to love him more.

And now Harry is spending four days at the happiest place on earth with all of his favorite people – his mum and stepdad, his four beautiful children, and his perfect husband.

Life couldn’t get any better than this.

Or, Harry and Louis go on holiday with their family to Disney World.

12. One Day, Maybe Next Week 6k

Louis was staring at him, expecting a response, and Harry was supposed to be the one coming up with that response, and he was so not prepared, so he blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

“Where were you? You weren’t on the bus for a few days.”

Louis raised an eyebrow. “What?”

“Uh… Sorry, I just- Um, sort of noticed that maybe you weren’t on the bus since last week. Not that I watch for when you’re on the bus or anything. That would be weird. Obviously, you have your own schedule, and I have mine. I just saw that you weren’t here, so I wondered what you were doing, or if something bad happened, like you got kidnapped or something. God, that sounded creepy. I promise I’m not threatening your life or something. Jesus, just stop me. If you have pepper spray, I would totally understand if you got me in the eyes right now.”

Louis had his lips pressed together at this point, holding back a laugh. Harry really didn’t blame him for that.

Or, the one where Harry just really wants to talk to Louis. And when he finally does, everything he says just comes out wrong.

13. Building Castles In the Sky 22k **

"D-dad? You think I c-can do it? Y-you think i c-can..." Evan trailed off looking down at his chest. And Louis' heart melted.

"I think you can do everything, love. Everything." Louis said while pulling his boy closer. "Because you, my little dandelion, are very brave! And so strong and wonderful and so very bright! You will go up on that stage, and you will blow everyone away. I just know it."

They laid there on their porch while they hugged each other tightly. His little boy was so brave. Louis didn't need to see him on a stage to be proud. He was proud of him already.

"You know,” Evan mumbled aloud again. “Mr. S-Styles says the same t-thing. He s-says I c-can do e-everything too.”

And Louis couldn't help but smile.

Or, where, Louis had a four year old with a stuttering problem. Harry was always there to help.

14. I Come Alive When I Hear Your Voice 7k

Harry let out a satisfied sigh and sat back in his cushioned office chair. He looked down at his laptop and tapped his fingers against his bottom lip in contemplation. He was fairly pleased with what he’d finished so far on his latest project; he just needed to fine-tune some bits and then send it off to his management for their approval. He sent his coworkers an e-mail giving them commenting rights on the document for any constructive criticism they might have, and cringed when his stomach let out an unholy gurgle.

Aka: Harry the mute songwriter falls in love with the single dad working at the bakery down the street from his studio.

15. Cupid’s Defense 116k **

In which Harry is Cupid, Louis and Liam own a law firm, and they're all getting sued.

16. Palms Reflecting In Your Eyes 6k **

Harry visits Louis at his campus and finds a crop on the wall.

17. There Is No Resistance 1k

It's Harry's birthday and Louis has found him the perfect gift.

18. Sound Like a Song 14k **

In high school, Louis Tomlinson lit up Harry’s world like nobody else, even if Harry did most of his pining from the safety of his tightly knit circle of friends. Ten years later, Harry is ready to make some changes. He’s tired of having so many regrets and not taking charge of his life, and he still hasn’t forgotten how brightly Louis shines. He’s about to get a long awaited second chance.

Or the one where Harry helps out at a farmer’s market and gives Louis free vegetables.

19. I’ve Seen How You Sparkle 56k *

Their eyes locked again and Harry blushed, suddenly feeling shy. Louis just smiled at him, tilting his head a little as his eyes ran over the younger boy. Harry self-consciously placed his arm over his stomach, afraid that Louis would somehow see through his clothes and notice the druid mark on his right hip. It was a triple spiral, a triskele. Although it wasn’t that big and fairly easy to hide, Harry was always paranoid that he would maybe stretch too much and reveal the mark.

It wasn’t that he actually believed Louis would have him executed, but he knew Louis was fiercely loyal to his father. If it came to choosing between Harry and his father, Harry was honestly not sure what Louis would do.

Or Louis is the Crown Prince of Camelot and Harry is a druid hiding his magic. It would have been a lot easier if he didn't also have to deal with a forbidden love, a dangerous quest and a whole lot of trouble.

20. One Shines Brighter 11k *

“Hi, baby. You doing anything fun today?”

Harry shrugs. “Dunno. Thought I’d see how I was feeling before making any plans.”

“You wanna get married?” Louis asks. Harry’s face breaks into a smile, and he nods.

Louis’ lips are just brushing Harry’s when Gemma appears in the hallway. “You two are in so much trouble.”

Harry's wedding was never supposed to be the happiest day of his life. No, that was going to be the day after, when he finally got to start his marriage. Unfortunately his family (and Louis) have other ideas.

Featuring a pair of moms who only want the best for their kids, meddling sisters with too much time on their hands, and a groom who gets caught up in the fairytale.

#monthly rec #mine #fic rec #larry fic rec #larry stylinson #harry styles #louis tomlinson #one direction #how far we've come #we'll be seamless #building castles in the sky #magic everywhere we go #sound like a song #cupids defence #it had to be you #chasing empty spaces

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atruththatyoudeny · 7 years

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Monthly Reads | August 2017

OMG! August was such a good month - I’ve read lots of amazing fics! Please make sure to also check out the fics under the cut! ❤ THANK YOU TO ALL WRITERS FOR YOUR HARD WORK AND FOR SHARING YOUR STORIES! ❤ Top 5 6 + 11 more under the cut:

Pray for some sweet simplicity

by delsicle | a/b/o | enemies to lovers | 237k Louis is the only omega to ever make it in the cut-throat world of competitive motorcycle racing—that is, he would be if anyone actually knew about his identity. Now, his sights are set towards competing in—and winning—the European Grand Prix, the biggest and most difficult race of the entire year, so he can disappear underground for good. He’s close enough, too, until an alpha sports journalist is assigned to follow Louis’s every move as he prepares for the event of his career. Or, an AU where motorcycle racing is the biggest sport in a heavily divided world, Louis is trying to take control of his own destiny, and Harry is in for more than he bargained for.

[*edited*]

Chasing Empty Spaces

by domesticharry | historical AU | 1930s | 79k The year is 1934 and Harry Styles was to inherent the largest tobacco firm in the south. His parents have picked out the “perfect” girl for him to marry and he has the privilege of receiving the highest education possible. The problem was, Harry hadn’t realized he didn’t actually want any part of that future until he met a mechanic named, Louis Tomlinson.

We’ll Be Seamless

by dinosaursmate for HL Fic Fest (2017) | Tumblr AU | pining | exhibitionism | voyeurism | 52k Green reblogged an old photo of himself. It was from back in October, a Halloween special. A pulse shot all the way through Louis because this photo was his absolute favourite, and it had taken the rest of the year for him to wean himself off of it. Green was on his knees, arms stretched out in front of him with his fingertips digging into the surface of his bed. He was wearing a pair of cat ears on his head, his curls falling forward. His back was arched, and in the foreground of the picture, Green’s bum was high in the air, a long, black cat tail sitting neatly between his cheeks. — Louis spends all his spare time scrolling arty nude blogs on Tumblr but amongst them all, Green is his favourite.

Given a Chance

by Fabby | Future Fic | canon compliant | slow burn | coming back together | anxiety attacks| 173k Five years after One Direction took their last tour, the last thing Louis Tomlinson ever expected to happen while on a tea run at the local Piggly Wiggly was to run into his ex-boyfriend and ex-bandmate Harry Styles. The odds of them ever running into each other again had to be super slim, right? Wrong. What happens when you mix ex-boyfriends with a large serving of Small Town America? Will Louis and Harry be able to set aside their differences, or will Louis be able to stay breezy as fuck in the wake of Harry’s arrival? (or, the one where Louis and Harry run into each other five years after One Direction ends and learn how to love each other again. Featuring: Reggie as the overweight labrador, Niall as Louis’ last grip on reality, and Nowheresville, North Carolina as the setting for Louis’ worst nightmare to come true.)

No sooner loved (series)

by benzos 1| As the winter to foul weather Trans character | mpreg | abortion | hurt/comfort | 45k AU. An unplanned pregnancy throws a spanner into Harry and Louis’ relationship. It wasn’t supposed to go like this. 2| You and you are sure together Trans character | eating disorder | hurt/comfort | 48k AU. The first day of fall term, Louis hits one of his residents in the face with a door. Later that day, said resident seeks refuge after a fight with his roommate. It becomes a thing. And then it becomes something else. 3| Baby, i’m speeding, and red lights are run pwp | 7k Louis really would’ve liked to just order the damn thing off the internet, but Harry insists that anything going inside your body ought to be thoroughly researched, which, apparently, mandates going to a sex shop. Knowing how ludicrously uncomfortable Louis is with the whole thing, Harry devises the ingenious solution of bringing Eleanor along and having her pose as Harry’s girlfriend who’s interested in trying out pegging, with Louis tagging along as a supportive best mate. It’s not Harry’s worst plan to date, but it’s somewhere in that range.

Under me, you

by hazzafrazza | friends to lovers | superheroes | 12 k You Won’t Believe Who Was Spotted Leaving Harry Styles’ Primrose Hill Pad! If Harry was being completely honest, it probably wasn’t the best idea to be a world-renowned popstar and an infamous vigilante. (Especially when all the comic books said never reveal your secret identity to keep your loved ones safe – which was all well and good, until Louis.) Or: Harry wants a lot of things – fame, glory, Louis – but that last one is particularly hard to get when everyone thinks you’re dating your secret superhero alter-ego and suddenly you’ve become your own worst cockblock.

Such Good Luck

by casuallyhl for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | Historical AU | 1910s | mpreg | secret relationship | class difference | 66k Louis smiles at Harry’s words, leaning into his touch. “Tell me again.” Smiling, Harry takes Louis into his arms. Pressing gentle kisses to his face, Harry murmurs, “In six months’ time, I will have my twenty-fifth birthday. On that day, my portion of the inheritance will become legally mine. And I plan that very day to announce to my family that I have found love.” Harry chuckles as he runs his lips lightly along Louis’ cheekbone. “That, in fact, I found love when I was twenty-one years old, and that I have loved and been loved every day since.” Or, an Edwardian AU where Harry is a young aristocratic lord and Louis is a working class dairy farmer. Secrets are a necessary part of their relationship, but Louis has one that could topple their whole world.

What A Life I’d Have Missed

by harioandlouigi for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | established relationship | 27k It all started with a prank, tears, and guilt. Louis has been pranking Harry since the day they met. Now, seven years later, Harry has finally come up with the perfect plan to prank his husband back. He has a borrowed positive pregnancy test in front of him, he’s perfected his facial expression, and he’s dead sure Louis will fall for it. He doesn’t exactly get the panicked reaction he expected, though. As a matter of fact, nothing ever seems to turn out the way he expects it to, but that’s for the best, really. Or, the one where an insensitive joke soon becomes a very real, happy pregnancy.

Small Doses (Loving You It’s Explosive)

by Anonymous for HL Summer Exchange 2017 | personal trainer Harry | boxing | dom/sub undertones | 38k Louis Tomlinson finds himself at Vitality Fitness to try and turn his life around after having left his cheating boyfriend of four years. The gym’s owner, Liam, quickly becomes a good friend, but his right hand man is rude and dismissive from the get-go. Louis and Harry continue to clash all while Harry is trying to move his way up the ranks in Manchester’s amateur boxing circuit, but they can’t seem to stay away from each other.

Sound Like a Song

by allwaswell16 for HL Fic Fest (2017) | 14k In high school, Louis Tomlinson lit up Harry’s world like nobody else, even if Harry did most of his pining from the safety of his tightly knit circle of friends. Ten years later, Harry is ready to make some changes. He’s tired of having so many regrets and not taking charge of his life, and he still hasn’t forgotten how brightly Louis shines. He’s about to get a long awaited second chance. Or the one where Harry helps out at a farmer’s market and gives Louis free vegetables.

Take Me Back to Where We Started

by amory | exes to lovers | famous/non-famous | 27k Harry and Louis haven’t spoken since they broke up four years ago. As boarding school sweethearts they once spent every waking moment together, but now they can hardly stand to be in the same room. When their five year class reunion comes around, both boys decide against their better judgement to return and (hopefully) have a good time. The only problem is, they’re both still hopelessly in love. Starring Harry as the petty ex, Louis as the new James Bond, Niall as a boy genius and fake boyfriend extraordinaire, and Liam and Zayn as two friends just trying to make it out of this weekend alive.

Tightrope

by Anonymous for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | exes | friends to lovers | 33k Louis knows he and Harry are going to be together for the rest of their lives and one day they were going to get married and have three point five children, a dog, and two cats. But life hasn’t matched up perfectly yet and that time is not now. So they are both happy to be best friends and casually date other people until life decides they really should get their shit together. aka Louis gets pregnant from “one last time” sex and he and Harry somehow think they’ll be able co-parent without it being weird for anyone (most especially their new boyfriends).

Souls; Plural, Parallel

by Anonymous for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | soulmates | 19k Soulmates are rare, the sort of rare that means everyone has a story about a friend’s sister’s coworker or a brother’s roommate’s cousin. But the fact of the matter is that most people never meet theirs. It’s unfortunate then, that Louis finds out the hard way that he met his soulmate in a club, and the guy never texted him back.

Friend Request

by Anonymous for HL Summer Exchange 2017 | 11k This was written for Kassio as a pinch hit for the HL Summer Exchange, from the prompt: “ Louis is bored on Facebook and in the “People you may know” suggestions, he sees the name Harry Styles. The profile picture doesn’t show the person. He thinks it’s an old family friend who he misses – maybe a middle-aged or elderly former neighbor or babysitter who he was fond of as a child - and sends a friend request. Turns out it’s not old man Harry from their old neighborhood, it’s hot young Harry (who he’s never met before) who accepts his friend request…”

If the Surface Begs You Home

by Anonymous for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | mermaid!Harry | 17k Harry is a mermaid from the underwater kingdom of Mercadia who is a little too fascinated by life above the surface. He’s kicked out of his home after he winds up pregnant, and has to figure out how to make his way in the world. Louis is the darling of the small neighbouring seaside village who came home after university to take over their local library, and can’t seem to stay away from the mysterious pregnant mermaid his friends introduce him to.

Out of the blue corner

by fallingaway | boxing | slow burn 85k Louis is a boxer banned because of doping. Harry is a journalist following the story. * * * “It seemed like a normal morning, but he had a feeling it was the quiet before the storm. And by storm, he meant getting involved in Louis Tomlinson’s life.”

#pray for some sweet simplicity #chasing empty spaces #we'll be seamless #given a chance #no sooner loved #hl mpreg fic exchange #hl summer exchange 2017 #hl fic fest 2017 #fic rec #monthly reads #my fic rec #pairing: larry #completed fics #my reads

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linaofthemyscira · 7 years

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Swimming with the Dolphins

Pairing: Jason Todd x Aquarium!Reader

Word Count: 2883 (wow so many words)

Prompt: reader works at the Gotham Aquarium and meets Jason Todd after a dolphin show and hit it off.

Warnings: [mild] language, fluff and smol angst. Also, I don’t know a lot about dolphins, I’m not a marine biologist, so if you happen to know a lot about dolphins and find something wrong, then I apologize in advance, I just really like dolphins.

A/N holy nuggets this is long like I didn’t see this coming at all. I’ll be posting the first part to my Jason Todd AU Adventurer fic tomorrow! Let me know if you wanna be tagged :)

Working as a dolphin trainer and caretaker at the Gotham Aquarium was probably the most fun job there was in that morbid city. With a degree in marine biology, it was perfect, especially since you did love dolphins. You were in charge of the incredibly popular dolphin show, “Dance of the Dolphins” and you really enjoyed letting people see all of the tricks and games you taught your aquatic friends. It didn’t even feel like a job. It felt like a dream.

However, one day, instead of the dolphins being in the spotlight, you were thrust into it accidentally.

When you arrived to work, you immediately went to the dolphin habitat to prepare for them for the show.

They immediately recognized you as you approached the pool where they stayed.

“Hi Flora! Hi Jasper!” You grinned and waved at them. They squeaked in response and you laughed. “Okay, where’s Marina and Thomas?” The other two dolphins didn’t pop up when you arrived. Flora and Marina were both found badly injured off the coast of the Florida Keys and were brought to Gotham after rehabilitation for a few years. Jasper, the most energetic, somehow swam all the way up to Gotham Harbor and was nearly run over by a fishing boat. Thomas was caught by a poacher in the Gulf of Mexico, which caught Bruce Wayne’s attention. Naturally, he paid the poacher and donated the dolphin to the aquarium. In his honor, you named the dolphin Thomas; after Mr. Wayne’s late father. You admired Mr. Wayne after his act of generosity. Sadly, you never had the opportunity to meet him since he always seemed to be busy and your timing was always off. Fortunately, he was going to be at the show that morning with his family, so you wanted to make sure he experienced the best possible show you could put on.

As if on cue, Marina and Thomas popped up and greeted you in unison.

“Okay! Everyone is here now,” You said as you took off your boots and sat down, “Guys…do you know what today is?”

You got multiple whistles at one time, so you calmed them down.

“Well you’re all right, but today is extra special because Bruce Wayne is going to be here! So, we have to do our best! That means rehearsals,” you told the dolphins as you began taking off your clothes and slipping on your wet-suit. Fortunately, no one was there to watch, so you were all clear. Then, you dove into the pool to begin the practice. All of the dolphins did the greeting you taught them when you dove into their pool. Except Thomas, who waited about 30 seconds before he came and greeted you.

“Hey, Tommy are you feeling okay?” you asked as you stroked his head and examined him to make sure he looked fine. He didn’t respond, he just blinked at you and looked around.

“Hmm, I better keep an eye on you…”

The show was starting in 10 minutes and you had grown incredibly concerned about Thomas. He had been “spaced out” and reacting late to all your directions. Near the end of the practice, he started to follow the routine, but you still didn’t want to push him and decided it would be best to let him rest and call the doctor to check up on him.

“Mr. Taylor! Mr. Taylor I think Thomas should sit this one out, he’s been out of it since I got here this morning. We should call the doctor. We can go on with Marina, Jasper and Flora.” You said as you ran to keep up with your boss, who was taking humongous strides around backstage.

“Y/N, we don’t have time to call the doctor to check up on Thomas, Mr. Wayne is sitting out there right now, expecting a show and if Thomas is not there he will be very disappointed and I can’t have that for this aquarium. The show must go on. Do what you have to do but don’t let me down,” Mr. Taylor said and turned on his heels away from you. You huffed and thought about what you were going to do when you heard a strangled cry from the dolphin pool. You turned around and saw that your co-workers were struggling to get Thomas ready to go into the show pool. He let out a string of distressed whistles, indicating he wanted to be left alone.

“Guys! Guys! Let me talk to him,” You walked over to him and squatted down near the edge of the pool.

“Hey buddy, I’m gonna need you to cooperate, okay? We have a big today. I need you to do this one show and then you’re done for today. We’ll take you to Dr. Shepard.” You stroked the top Thomas’ beak. He nodded and you helped your co-workers usher him into the show pool with his siblings.

5 minutes. You anxiously walked up the steps and peeked out the curtains. You spotted Mr. Taylor conversing with Bruce Wayne, and your anxiety level shot up 6 notches. You looked at the people next to him, all boys. One in particular caught your eye; he was looking at his phone in the midst of the chaos around him. You could only assume that the boys on his left and right were his brothers, but you couldn’t be too sure. He had pitch black hair, but a white tuft peeked out from the front. When he looked up, you gasped quietly. He was pretty darn cute, and before you knew it, your stare was met with his own. A small smile played on his lips as his aquamarine eyes looked into yours. Before it could get anymore awkward, you closed the curtain in front of you and mentally prepared yourself. Now that you knew a cute boy would be watching you as well, your anxiety went up another two notches.

30 seconds. You smoothed out your wet-suit for the show, a short-sleeve full-body bathing suit decorated by the aqua blue and black theme colors of the aquarium. You quickly threw your hair into a ponytail, and suddenly, the curtain opened and the spotlight shone down on you.

The crowd cheered as you gave a smile and waved at them. You got the microphone from a co-worker and began speaking.

“Hello Gotham!” You said enthusiastically.

“Hi!” They greeted back.

“My name is [F/N] [L/N], I would like to start off the show by saying thank you all for coming here today to watch our friends, Flora, Jasper, Marina and Thomas! A special thank you to Mister Bruce Wayne for making an appearance to support the ‘Save the Dolphins!’ awareness campaign that the Gotham Aquarium is proud to be a contributor toward. Without further ado, welcome to Dance of the Dolphins!” You said and gave the microphone back to the coworker. Then you sat down on the ledge of pool, joining your friends and beginning the show. The first song began and you blew your whistle a certain number of times to indicate the start of the routine. Everything was running smoothly.

Flora and Jasper did flips and sprayed the audience while Marina and Thomas let you ride them around the pool. It wasn’t until Thomas was supposed to do his solo routine that things started going south.

You blew the whistle combination and waited for Thomas to execute it but he instead began swimming around in circles and letting out disgruntled whistles. You took off your whistle and dove back into the pool, swimming towards Thomas to try and calm him down, but he swam away from you and towards the other end of the pool.

Suddenly he swam and leapt high into the air and the next thing you knew, his beak crashed into you as he dove back into the water, taking you down with him.

You couldn’t hear anything as you sunk to the bottom of the pool. But the audience had fallen silent, and the music abruptly stopped. Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim and Damian all stood up to see if they could find you, when you suddenly popped up from the water. You took a deep breath as the audience, especially Jason, sighed in relief.

“CALL DR. SHEPARD! STOP THE SHOW!” you shouted to one of your coworkers. You managed to free yourself from Thomas’ beak but the impact was so hard that he passed out and now you were struggling to keep him afloat at the surface.

Marina, Flora and Jasper swam over and started helping you keep Thomas up. You knew dolphins were smart, but you didn’t know they were that smart. You led the dolphins to the ledge of the pool where many of your marine biologists co-workers were waiting with a dolphin gurney to take Thomas to a special place to see the aquarium’s dolphin specialist and doctor. You had gotten out of the water as well and a warm towel was brought to you so you could dry off and relax.

“Y/N, do we need to call paramedics for you? It looked like you took a hard hit to your shoulder.” a friend of yours asked.

“I’m fine, it’s just sore,” You told her.

“Let me look at it,” your friend sat down next to you. You took off your towel and your friend gasped; you had begun to bleed in your wet suit and your shoulder portion was crimson red.

“Oh my god, Y/N, you’re bleeding! Call the paramedics!” your friend called out.

“No wonder why I’ve been feeling lightheaded,” You slurred and then everything was black.

When you woke up, you found you were still at the aquarium, and your shoulder was all patched up.

“She didn’t fracture or break anything, thank God, but she did earn a large gash which we just cleaned up, but she should be okay,” You heard someone say. Possibly the doctor. You weren’t sure. You still felt groggy. “She did lose a lot of blood though, so I suggest she doesn’t come to work for at least 2 weeks.”

“Two weeks?! Y/N can’t be out for 2 weeks! She’s our alpha! Our ringmaster! She leads the show!” Mr. Taylor exclaimed.

“I think 2 weeks without Y/N will be just fine Mr. Taylor.” Another voice chimed in. Mr. Wayne.

“She oughta sue you for this,” one more voice chimed in.

“Jason…” Mr. Wayne’s voice warned.

“It’s true! According to a worker, Y/N knew that Thomas was having trouble and told Taylor about it but he insisted that the show continue. You knew that something was wrong and you put her in the line of danger and that is despicable,” Jason told them.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Jason has a point. No mean to be disrespectful, Mr. Taylor, but you did know about Thomas and still wanted the show to go on. It sort of is your fault,” another voice said.

“Full offense but you’re the reason she’s hurt and I hope she sues,” a higher pitched voice said.

“Guys, calm down, it’s up to Y/N what she does. For now, just let her rest,” one more voice added.

“Too late, she’s awake…I think…” a boy leaned over you. Your vision was blurry, but you could faintly make out dark hair and blue eyes.

“I’m alive,” you slurred. You tried to prop yourself up but the doctor stopped you.

“Just lie down, Y/N,” he said to you.

“As much as I appreciate the accusations towards me, I have to deal with this fiasco of a show. Thank you still for making an appearance, Mr. Wayne and company,” Mr. Taylor said with slight sarcasm.

“You’re not welcome,” the youngest boy said.

“Alright guys give her some space,” someone had said.

“Boys, go sit down, I’m gonna have a chat with Miss Y/N.” Bruce said. You suddenly felt yourself getting propped up and then you were face to face with him. Bruce Wayne.

“H-hi,” you tried to wave but your arm was sore.

“First, I’d like to say I’m sorry for this. I understand that you really wanted to impress me and put a lot of hard work into this show. Don’t worry about it. I’m just a guy. Do your work for you,” Bruce reassured you.

“It’s okay. I just wanted to repay you for saving Thomas and letting him come here. He’s an amazing friend. I’m just worried that he’s hurt,” you told Bruce. A small smile appeared, feeling honored that something he did made you happy.

“I think he’ll be okay,” Bruce patted your knee.

“I hope so.”

After talking to Bruce for a few more minutes, the green eyed boy came back, a serious look on his well defined features.

“Jason. Can I help you?” Bruce asked. So that was his name. Jason.

“I just want to talk to her,” Jason grumbled. Your face burned as he looked to the ground. Bruce understood and got up.

“Okay, I’ll be outside,” Bruce said and left you and Jason alone. He turned to you and stuck his hands in his jacket pockets. It wasn’t until then that you noticed how tall and broad he was. You were short, well you thought you were short, but you were actually average, but compared to him…you felt like an a chihuahua.

“Hi. I’m Jason,” he greeted you. You gave him smile.

“I know.” You responded. He gave you a confused look and then you realized how weird that sounded.

“I mean Mr. Wayne referred to you as ‘Jason’ a few seconds ago, so….” you began blushing.

“Oh right. Well your name is…?” Jason asked.

“Y/N. [Y/N] [L/N].” You told him.

“Nice. So, you train dolphins,” he looked around.

“Yeah. I do,” you responded. Small talk. You hated it.

“Sorry, I can’t hold this in: you should sue your boss. I mean you told him about Thomas and then you got hurt. That’s stupid,” Jason blurted out.

“I mean, yeah but he’s just the aquarium manager he studied business, not marine biology. I can’t blame him for not knowing exactly what I meant.” you tried to defend your boss even though you were angry with him.

“It doesn’t matter he should pay the consequences for his actions. You’re hurt. You can’t train dolphins for 2 weeks. That’s his fault,” Jason made a point. You sighed, knowing he was right.

“I mean I guess you’re right. But I don’t have a lawyer–” you started.

“You can use one of Bruce’s I’m sure he’ll be okay with it,” Jason sat down next to you. You saw a twinkle in his eyes, he was excited that you agreed with him.

“Really? No that’s too much. You’ve already done enough for me,” you shook your head.

“Seriously.” Jason looked straight into your eyes, his eyebrows furrowed and his lips pulled into a thin line. He was serious.

“Okay, thank you,” you gave him a small smile.

“Good. Guys like him don’t deserve to get away with hurting people,” Jason looked at the ceiling. You wondered what he meant. Maybe someone killed his parents or a loved one like what happened to Bruce. “I guess now would be a bad time to tell you that Bruce payed the hospital bill.”

You sighed in defeat, “If I had known I wouldn’t have agreed to using your lawyers.”

“That was the point,” Jason smirked at you.

“Oh shut up,” you sheepishly grinned.

“There are those pearly white you flashed earlier,” he raised an eyebrow at you. “You should smile more often, it looks good on you.”

Your face heated up at his compliment. He was flirting with you, but you weren’t sure to respond.

“Well if you want to see it more often you should try asking me out,” you quickly said. Then you covered mouth and mentally cringed. Talk about having no filter.

Jason raised both eyebrows, then decided to take the challenge.

“Okay. Y/N, can I take you out?” Jason asked as he stood up and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Um, yeah. In two weeks,” you smiled. He let out a low chuckle and you giggled.

“Two weeks. It’s a date,” he told you.

“Sounds great,” you said.

“Well, I better get going. Feel better. And if you need some company, just give me a call. I’ll be around,” he turned around and walked toward the curtain.

“Wait but you didn’t give me your number,” you called out. He stopped and turned to face you with that smirk on his lips.

“Check your jacket pocket,” he said and then went through the curtains, leaving you alone on the makeshift hospital bed backstage.

When you were ready to go, you checked your jacket pockets and sure enough, a piece of paper was tucked away in your left pocket.

Jason’s name was scrawled out in pen along with his phone number written messily. You laughed as you got your stuff from your locker and joined your friend outside. She was supposed to assist you home, make sure you didn’t hurt yourself along the way.

You couldn’t stop thinking about his charming smile and mischievous eyes.

On your way home, you silently thanked Thomas for bringing you and Jason together.

TAGGING:

@redhoodshood

(Once again if you wanna be on my tag list, then let me know!)

#jason todd #jason todd x reader #batfamily #batfam imagine #batfam x reader #tim drake #damian wayne #dick grayson #bruce wayne #dolphins #red hood

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ganshreeeddy · 4 months

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#Best office space for rent in basavangudi #office space for rent in basavangudi #top office space for rent in basavangudi

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mollywood117 · 7 years

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A Message From the CEO:

About 5 years ago I took a year off from college to help pay for my tuition and completed a year of service with Americorps and City Year Los Angeles. I was living in South LA and was thrown into a 5th grade classroom adjacent to the wonderful human in the photo- Dhaujee Kelly. I could write endlessly about the impact that year of service had on my life and how I ABSOLUTELY got more than I gave. I worked all year in the classroom with my 5th graders on math, language arts, reading, etc doing everything in my power to help get them on track with basic skills despite everything in their external environment working against them.

I just kept showing up. Everyday. Some days were harder than others. Some days I had no idea if I was making a difference. Some days my students would surprise me. And some days I would be handing my students off for pick-up and I would see a look in their parent’s eyes of humanity- despite the language barrier. A look of exhaustion, appreciation, and most of all gratitude. That’s when I knew.. I was in fact making a difference.

June came along and summer vacation was weeks away. My students, who I spent all year working with were about to go off on a 2 month break away from all the structure, support, and the positive influence container we had created. I asked: “what are you guys doing this summer?” they answered: “I don’t know Miss playing video games, babysitting my cousins, hanging around the neighborhood”. Not summer camp, like I had been lucky enough to attend as a child. My heart sank because I had no idea what would happen to them after school ended. I knew what they faced outside of our container so I went online those last few weeks and desperately tried to find any sort of low-cost summer camp. Nothing. Existed. There were awesome robotics, engineering, arts camps that ran anywhere from $300-600 PER WEEK. The majority of my students received free or low cost lunch subsidies in school. Study after study shows summer is when the achievement gap widens between affluent and low-income students. Trust me, we’ve spent the last 8 months researching it.

I was lucky though!! I got to escape their reality and go back to my life, continue my college education, and graduate with a 4 year degree. I got a corporate job, I worked for 2 years and life was great. But it wasn’t. This is the part of ancient literature known as “THE CALLING”. I was hit in the face with this GREAT responsibility to be DOING something and I didn’t want to ignore it. So I did something. I texted Dhaujee this frantic, excited, inarticulate, passionate idea I had. She goes “same page, let’s do it”.

HERE WE ARE. Keep reading.

It’s November 2016 and we want to create, operate, and somehow fund a FREE?! high quality academic summer camp for 30 at-risk students THIS summer aka in 8 months. From absolutely nothing. Yeah. Trust me. We had a lotttt of non-believers. We were even kinda like huh... yeah... this is pretty huge to try and take on. I woke up some mornings and was like oh my what did I get us into. What are we doing. How is this going to happen. That’s it, how do I turn back. But I also had this faith and other voice.... That everything would work out. We’re Molly and Dhaujee, it’ll happen.

And that’s the BEST PART. Every time those thoughts crept in, the universe said stop being dramatic you’re DOING THIS. And so, the universe just truly became a CLEARING. In every sense.

2 months after we started I pitched the idea to my circle of friends and my coworkers. That next week I had 15 people in my one bedroom apartment volunteering their time to make sure this happened, spreading our mission in the community. Then, we had a creative team create ALL of our design, media... everything, again, from NOTHING. Practically pro-bono because they believed in this project and what we were out to do. THEN, the 2 most stressful parts... fell in our lap. We had a prominent, well-respected community center offer us an entire building on their campus for ONE-FOURTH (1/4) of the cost of what every university and college had been quoting us. And it was open and they were so excited to fill the space. THEN we needed an event space to hold a fundraiser so we could operate this summer. We had an amazing venue let us have our gala for ONE-TENTH (1/10) of what every other space in LA was quoting us. AND THEN I had a former Bentley U classmate and friend offer his family business to donate all the supplies for our students for the summer.

So in many words...the universe decided it was.indeed.happening. And then we started getting campers.

But we’re not there yet. Despite having the skinniest budget of any high quality summer program ever in existence, we still need about $50k. To cover our insurance, lunches/snacks, transportation, field trips, payroll, volunteer stipends, etc. We’re about 1/4 of the way there in thanks to the many many generous people in our lives and the community.

To conclude, it’s decided that I’m taking a stand- if that wasn’t already obvious. I’m taking a complete and total stand for all students, no matter their zip code- to have access to summer camp, to have a place to be a kid, to have a place that keeps them on track and college ready, and to have a community that supports them to reach their full potential.

THIS Thursday, 5/11 we’re having our inaugural fundraising gala in Venice, CA. The theme is a summer garden party. The goal is to raise the other $40k we need. If you’re not in the SoCal area but are feeling inspired by our mission and our commitment to students please consider donating to the deserving kids who are about to have the trajectory of their lives TOTALLY changed this summer. You would be apart of that and we’re hoping you will be. Any way you’d like to be involved we will welcome you: services, supplies, spaces, etc. If you’re not in the area also don’t worry because we’ll be coming to a city near you soon enough. Thank you for reading and thank you to those reading that have already supported. Thank you for making this possible. Thank you to Dhaujee, I need another 3000 word blog post to thank you and give you all the credit you deserve- you’re an educational genius and this collaboration is a dream. Thank you for being in this with me and being the reason this is happening. Ticket link in bio or urbansummeracademy.org

Cheers!

Your CEO,

Molly A Godfrey

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architectnews · 4 years

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Rochester Commons Singapore Development

Rochester Commons Development Singapore, Southeast Asia Property, Buildings

Rochester Commons Singapore

9 Sep 2020

Rochester Commons Singapore Buildings

Design consultant: Gensler ; Project architect: DCA Architects Pte Ltd

Location: one-north, Singapore

Singapore, 9 September 2020 – Targeted for completion in 4Q 2021, Rochester Commons in Singapore’s one-north is set to become a first-of-its-kind integrated campus-style development set on 2.4 hectares of lushly landscaped grounds. In addition to a Grade A office tower, hotel and 12 black-and-white heritage bungalows, Rochester Commons will feature Catapult, Southeast Asia’s first shared executive learning centre designed to deliver training programmes in an experiential and immersive way using the latest learning technologies.

Targeted for completion in 4Q 2021, Rochester Commons in Singapore’s one-north is set to become a first-of-its-kind integrated campus-style development, built in line with the Singapore government’s vision for a world-class learning ecosystem in one-north: image : CapitaLand

Built in line with the Singapore government’s vision for a world-class learning ecosystem in one-north, the approximately 400,000 square feet (sq ft) integrated development is developed and managed by CapitaLand. The hotel component will be operated by CapitaLand’s lodging arm The Ascott Limited under the Citadines Connect brand.

Designed by Gensler, Rochester Commons will include a 17-storey Grade A office tower with over 200,000 sq ft of core and flex working spaces. Corporates can choose from column-free large floor plates spanning 22,500 sq ft per floor or in one of the seven heritage bungalows that have been conserved and converted into unique workspaces.

Mr Tan Yew Chin, CEO, CapitaLand Singapore, said: “Located in Singapore’s renowned research and knowledge hub one-north, where CapitaLand already has a strong presence, Rochester Commons further strengthens and diversifies the Group’s offerings to support the hub-and-spoke and core-and-flex workspace needs of companies in the COVID-19 new normal. As a unique campus-style integrated development, Rochester Commons will further complement CapitaLand’s real estate ecosystem and increase our competitive advantage.”

“As companies and individuals adapt to the post COVID-19 environment, executive education and reskilling will be increasingly important. Catapult at Rochester Commons is well-positioned to cater to this demand with programmes that focus on leadership development and grooming of talent for regional and senior roles. More than just a standalone learning facility, Catapult is designed to facilitate cross-learning and networking in a state-of-the-art campus. Catapult will also feature an online platform where learners and knowledge providers can learn, co-create and innovate for the future economy.”

Rochester Commons will include a 17-storey Grade A office tower with over 200,000 sq ft of core and flex working spaces. Corporates can choose from column-free large floor plates spanning 22,500 sq ft per floor or in one of the seven heritage bungalows that have been conserved and converted into unique workspaces: image : CapitaLand

Catapult

Catapult is a purpose-built executive learning centre open to the broader learning community. It aims to create the ideal learning space, and curate impactful curriculum to groom executives for leadership agility and with future-ready skills relevant in a regional and global context.

The curriculum focuses on three main pillars: Leadership, Innovation and Human Energy for Peak Performance, all delivered in partnership with an extensive network of best in class knowledge providers and through immersive learning experiences. Knowledge partners at Catapult come from multiple disciplines and industries who bring with them enriching and useful leadership skills, and the workshops conducted will leverage Catapult’s technology capability to deliver more interactive, engaging and stimulating content.

Catapult will feature technologies such as virtual and augmented reality as well as neuroscience principles adopting immersive learning approaches, some of which are already on trial at Catapult’s showroom at the Bridge+ coworking space in Ascent building at Singapore Science Park 1. The centerpiece is a 180-degree immersive screen which facilitates shared virtual reality viewing experience during workshops as well as expanded virtual conferencing capabilities. The panoramic screen brings to life 3D visuals such as spatial layouts and allows easy viewing of content on screen.

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Prior to its launch at Rochester Commons next year, Catapult has already been hosting learning programme pilots since early 2019. These pilots are curated by Catapult and jointly conducted with knowledge partners, offering potential corporate clients a preview of the courses which will be available. In light of COVID-19, Catapult has successfully conducted these pilot programmes virtually since April 2020.

Seamless tech-enabled experience

Designed for the community to enjoy secure and seamless access, Rochester Commons will feature a single digital identity access that allows executives to easily move through the entire integrated development via facial recognition, QR code scanning or access cards. A mobile app will be available for tenants and visitors to book amenities and access building services. Rochester Commons will also deploy a cloud-based intelligent building platform that allows the property manager to draw insights using energy and space usage data to optimise building functions for occupiers’ comfort.

The 135-unit Citadines Connect Rochester Singapore will similarly offer tech-enabled features such as mobile keys, self check-in kiosks and content streaming-enabled televisions. Entirely digital-enabled, guests will be able to book, check-in, request for services, check loyalty points, check out, make payment and provide feedback via an app.

Catering to both short and long stays, Citadines Connect Rochester Singapore is ideal for leisure and business travellers. The hotel will have a swimming pool as well as a 24-hour gymnasium. Service robots will perform tasks such as concierge services, delivering clean laundry and refilling room supplies. Guests can also recharge at the ‘Re-Space’ – a lounge area fitted with USB charging points, lockers and shower rooms for guests to rest and relax.

Green spaces and amenities

The integrated development will be connected via an approximately 1,200 ft green trail, interspersed with a sky garden, viewing decks, event spaces and meeting pods for the community to enjoy the outdoors. With its eco-friendly features, Rochester Commons has clinched the Singapore’s Building and Construction Authority’s highest accolade, the Green Mark Platinum award.

The F&B establishments at five of the heritage bungalows will feature exciting dining options and new-to-market concepts to further boost the vibrancy of the area. Rochester Commons will also have outdoor social spaces including a multi-purpose outdoor court named ’Common Ground’, where executives can take part in curated community events.

Strategic location and excellent connectivity

Rochester Commons is located between Singapore’s two major business hubs – the Central Business District and International Business Park at Jurong Lake District, the latter set to become the largest commercial and regional centre outside the city centre. Situated within one-north, Singapore’s research and knowledge hub, the integrated development is colocated with international businesses and research facilities. Rochester Commons is a short walk from Buona Vista MRT station which serves the East-West and Circle lines. The integrated development also has ample bicycle parking and end-of-trip facilities.

Rochester Commons will boost CapitaLand’s presence in the one-north precinct, where it already manages Galaxis, an office building with a retail podium. Through its lodging arm, The Ascott Limited, CapitaLand also manages Citadines Fusionopolis Singapore and the upcoming lyf one-north Singapore. Within the Greater one-north region, CapitaLand Group operates Singapore Science Park 1 and Singapore Science Park 2.

Rochester Commons Singapore – Building Information

Location: 1 Rochester Park, Singapore 139212

Description: An integrated development comprising a 17-storey Grade Aoffice tower and 12 black-and-white heritage bungalows.

17-storey tower: – a shared executive learning centre (part L2 and L3 of tower) – 135-unit business hotel (part L2, L4 to L7) – office space (L8 to L17) 12 heritage bungalows: – seven bungalows for offices – five bungalows for F&B or retail

Gross floor area: Office 260,000 sq ft Shared executive learning centre 54,000 sq ft Hotel 60,000 sq ft F&B / Retail 22,000 sq ft Total 396,000 sq ft

Estimated completion: date 4Q 2021 Design consultant: Gensler Project architect: DCA Architects Pte Ltd No. of car park spaces: About 144 lots (for the entire development)

Rochester Commons Singapore images / information received 090920

Offices

Location: one-north, Singapore

Singapore Architecture

CapitaLand Office of the Future, Capital Tower & Asia Square Tower 2, Singapore CBD image : CapitaLand CapitaLand Office of the Future

Singapore Architecture Designs – chronological list

Singapore Office Buildings

South East Asia Office Architecture

Marina One Singapore Design: Ingenhoven Architects image © ingenhoven architects / photo : HGEsch Marina One in Singapore

Early Learning Village Design: Bogle Architects photo © Bogle Architects-Infinitude Early Years Village Singapore Building

Changi Airport Interior Design: Moment Factory image courtesy of architecture office Changi Airport Building

Architecture in Singapore

Singapore Architecture Designs – chronological list

Singapore Architecture Walking Tours

Singapore Architects Offices : Practice Listings

Singapore Architecture

Office Buildings

Comments / photos for the Rochester Commons Singapore – South East Asian Architecture Design page welcome

Website: Visit Singapore

The post Rochester Commons Singapore Development appeared first on e-architect.

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instantdeerlover · 4 years

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The Best Happy Hours In Austin added to Google Docs

The Best Happy Hours In Austin

Every single weekday there comes a moment when you’ve either finished all your to-dos or read the entire internet. When that time arrives, you deserve to get yourself to the nearest establishment serving drinks priced at what you actually deserve to pay for them. And while alcohol is always good, the superior Happy Hour involves deals on both good drinks and good food. Luckily, Austin has many of them. This is our guide to the best Happy Hours in town that’ll get you through the work week.

Also see our guide to the best outdoor Happy Hours.

the spots Maggie Svoboda Italic $ $ $ $ Pizza , Pasta , Italian in Downtown Austin $$$$ 123 W 6th St

When: Weekdays 2:30-6:30pm

The Deal: $10 pizzas; $5 select wines, cocktails, and beers

If we were giving out awards for longest Happy Hour, Italic’s - clocking in at four hours - would be in a tie for first place (see the next place on this list). They’re also first place in our hearts for only charging $10 for pizzas that normally cost $18 or $19 during dinner.

Jack Allen's Kitchen $ $ $ $ American in South Austin $$$$ 7720 W Highway 71

When: Weekdays 3-7pm

The Deal: Half off all appetizers; drink specials

There are three locations of Jack Allen’s Kitchen in Austin (and one in Round Rock), and they all do half off appetizers during Happy Hour, which is a very good deal. Whether it’s a late lunch or early dinner, you can make a very solid full meal out of appetizers like BLT sliders, bacon-wrapped Texas quail, and smoked beef rib quesadillas.

Maggie Svoboda Foreign & Domestic $ $ $ $ American in North Loop $$$$ 306 E 53rd St

When: Tue-Sat 5-6:30pm

The Deal: Half off wine by the glass and Austin beers; $8 cheeseburger; $6 zeppole; $4 onion rings and popovers

During dinner at Foreign & Domestic, a burger and fries is $18, but the Happy Hour burger is only $8. Math is hard, but that’s basically $10 for French fries, which means you can and should spend that $10 you just saved by ordering zeppole and onion rings instead, and still somehow come out ahead. Also on Tuesdays, Foreign & Domestic does $1 oysters and 50% off chilled wine all night.

Lenoir $ $ $ $ American in South Austin $$$$ 1807 S 1st St

When: Tue-Sun 5-6:30pm

The Deal: Half off bottles of wine under $80 (outside only)

Lenoir’s awesome backyard wine bar - with the Live Oaks and twinkly lights - is a special place to hang out with your friends. Friends are cool and all, but the real reason you bring people here during Happy Hour is so that you can order whole bottles of wine for half off.

Kome $ $ $ $ Japanese , Raw Bar , Sushi in North Loop $$$$ 5301 Airport Blvd

When: Mon-Thurs 5-6pm

The Deal: $5 cocktails, $4 beers, $3 appetizers, and $6 rolls

Kome only has one hour designated for its deals and after-work happiness. But that just means we only invite the co-workers who never show up late to meetings and are willing to put up a very vague email auto-reply starting at 4:45pm.

Better Half Coffee & Cocktails $ $ $ $ American in Clarksville $$$$ 406 Walsh St

When: Tues-Fri 3pm-6pm

The Deal: $5 cheeseburgers, $5 sangria, $3 beer cans

Based on how busy Better Half is during the day, you’ll often wonder if people in Austin even have jobs. Maybe the draw is the nice backyard, or maybe it’s the $5 cheeseburgers during Happy Hour. Better Half also has a reverse Happy Hour with $5 cocktails and $2 Pearl beers Tues-Sun from 9-11pm.

Roger Ho Loro $ $ $ $ Chinese , Sandwiches , BBQ in South Lamar $$$$ 2115 S Lamar Blvd

When: Weekdays 2-5pm

The Deal: Half off boozy slushies, beer, and wine; select menu items $4-9

The set-up at Loro is ideal for work Happy Hours, so snag a picnic table for your whole team and spend most of the time on a secret Slack channel furtively and furiously talking about Sharon’s double-dipping habit. It’s also the only time of day you can order certain menu items - like the burger and smoked chicken wings - which makes all of the double-dipping bearable.

Irene's $ $ $ $ American , Cafe/Bakery in Downtown Austin $$$$ 506 West Ave

When: Monday-Saturday 3:30-6:30pm, all day Sunday

The Deal: $4 house cocktails, $1 off draft beers, $2 off snacks

Things we’re grateful for at a Happy Hour: enough seating for all of the coworkers/friends you actually like and free popcorn because snacks are what make us happiest. Order the wings and spinach dip and sit out in the patio to remind you that the sun still exists even if you don’t see it all day.

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plus more restaurant intel you won't find anywhere else. ATL ATX BOS CHI LDN LA MIA NYC PHL SF SEA DC Subscribe Smart move. Excellent information will arrive in your inbox soon. Do you have friends and family who also eat food? Enter their emails below and we’ll make sure they’re eating well. (Don’t worry, we won’t subscribe them to our newsletter - they can do that themselves.) Help Your Friends No Thanks Well done. You’re a good person. All good. We still like you. Want to quickly find restaurants on the go? Download The Infatuation app. Roger Ho June's All Day $ $ $ $ American , Cafe/Bakery , European in South Congress $$$$ 1722 South Congress Avenue

When: Monday-Friday, 4-6pm

The Deal: 25% off all food; half off all sparkling wine; $2 off all other drinks

During June’s Happy Hour, everything on the menu - from fried chicken sandwiches to steak tartare - is 25% off. And the champagne is half off, which means you can have a proper toast to your new favorite Happy Hour in town. Sparkling wines are half off all night on Mondays, too.

Nicolai McCrary Bufalina $ $ $ $ Pizza in East Austin $$$$ 1519 E Cesar Chavez St

When: Daily (Wed-Sun), 4-5:30pm

The Deal: Half off all pizzas; $5 house wine; half off all bottles of wine under $100

If it’s too early for dinner, grab a snack at Bufalina and order a bottle of wine normally reserved for a celebration - but for half off. And then promptly get some pizza afterward.

Casey Dunn Jeffrey's $ $ $ $ American , French , Steaks in Clarksville $$$$ 1204 W Lynn St

When: All night Monday; Tuesday-Sunday 4:30-6:30pm

The Deal: Half off bar food; $2 off all drinks; only at the bar

Unless you’re really going all-out, dinner at Jeffrey’s is a little expensive for a casual weeknight. But their daily Happy Hour is a great time to grab a few drinks and half-price appetizers (or even a steak) at the bar, and see who goes out for $50 risotto on a Wednesday.

Jessica Fradono Odd Duck $ $ $ $ American , Southern in Bouldin , South Lamar $$$$ 1201 S Lamar Blvd

When: Sunday-Thursday, 2:30-6:30pm

The Deal: Half-price select bottles of wine and large format beer; $6 draft cocktails; half-price select food (5-6:30pm only)

If you’re only working a half-day, or think you might lose it if another person asks you to “circle back” in an email, head to Odd Duck. You can get a $6 draft cocktail or some half-price wine, and see how long you can extend an already late lunch without your coworkers noticing.

Maggie Svoboda Uchi $ $ $ $ Japanese , Sushi in South Lamar $$$$ 801 S Lamar Blvd

When: Daily, 5-6:30pm

The Deal: $3-11 dishes; $3-7 sake, wine, and beer; $7 seasonal dessert

Uchi is best known for their sushi, but what they should actually be best known for is their “sake social,” the daily Happy Hour during which you can sample excellent rolls and classic Uchi bites for a fraction of the price. If you haven’t been, you’re doing things all wrong. P.S. this happens at Uchiko, too.

Mica McCook Easy Tiger $ $ $ $ Bar Food , Cafe/Bakery in Downtown Austin $$$$ 709 E 6th St

When: Weekdays, 4:30-6:30pm

The Deal: $5 sausages; $3 pretzels and beer cheese; $3 off Antonelli’s cheese plate; $4 select cocktails; $3 select beers

Need a place to kick back with some beers and snacks downtown? You can’t do much better than Easy Tiger’s beer garden that feels a little hidden and tucked away. During Happy Hour, there’s very little chance you’ll spend more than $20. You could, but it’d be a lot of pretzels. Easy Tiger Linc has a similar Happy Hour too.

Maggie Svoboda Clark's Oyster Bar $ $ $ $ American , Raw Bar in Clarksville $$$$ 1200 W 6th St

When: Daily, 3-6pm

The Deal: Weekdays: 50 cents off oysters; half off burgers; $5 martinis, oyster shooters & draft beers. Weekends: 50 cents off oysters; half-price bottles of wine; $5 oyster shooters

We love oysters. You love oysters. But everyone loves them more when they’re not so expensive. You’ll go to Clark’s for their Happy Hour-priced oysters, but you’ll stay for the burger (half-off has never looked so good) and the patio.

Toño Daal El Alma Cafe y Cantina $ $ $ $ Mexican in Bouldin $$$$ 1025 Barton Springs Rd

When: Daily 3-6pm

The Deal: $4 beers; $5 sangría; $6-7 margaritas; discounted appetizers

El Alma is home to one of the best patios in Austin, and somehow not everyone has figured out about it yet. Sit on the double-level roof under an umbrella, enjoy your Happy Hour margaritas and guacamole, and feel pretty damn good about your decisions.

Maggie Svoboda La Condesa $ $ $ $ Mexican in Downtown Austin $$$$ 400 W 2nd St

When: Weekdays, 5-7pm in the bar area

The Deal: Half-off all alcoholic beverages; appetizer specials

Austin has many, many margaritas. And La Condesa’s margarita is one of the best in town. During Happy Hour at the bar here, you can get it for half off.

Maggie Svoboda Parkside $ $ $ $ American in Downtown Austin $$$$ 301 E 6th St

When: Daily, 5-6pm

The Deal: Half off cocktails, beer, wine, and full food menu Wednesday: Half off oyster platters and bubbles all night

Hidden in the depths of Dirty Sixth, Parkside has a short but solid daily Happy Hour. Here’s your strategy: get here when it starts, order two of everything, and you’ll be set for the evening.

Licha's Cantina $ $ $ $ Mexican in East Austin $$$$ 1306 E 6th St

When: Tuesday-Friday, 4-6pm

The Deal: $5 cocktails and bites

Kick off a night on the East Side at Licha’s with $5 margaritas and food. The only possible downside is that you just might end up sticking around all evening.

Bryan Flannery Whisler's $ $ $ $ East Austin $$$$ 1816 E 6th St

When: Weekdays 4-7pm; Weekends 12-4pm

The Deal: $7-9 cocktails

Whisler’s is already a crowd favorite for its giant outdoor space, but its $7 cocktails are enough to make anyone a regular from 4-7pm.

Maggie Svoboda Contigo Austin $ $ $ $ American , Southern in East Austin $$$$ 2027 Anchor Ln

When: Mon-Fri 4-6pm

The Deal: $5 bar snacks, $6 cocktails and house wine

Contigo is a pretty great post-work spot where you can grab a table outside and order beers and snacks for the crew. The charred avocado and the queso are solid Happy Hour options, and the crispy green beans are an excellent way to eat your veggies while also eating something fried.

Jordan Haro El Chile Cafe y Cantina $ $ $ $ Mexican , Tex-Mex in Manor $$$$ 1809 Manor Rd

When: Daily, 3-6:30pm

The Deal: $4-8 select cocktails and margaritas; $3 20 oz. beers; $5-11 appetizers

El Chile is always an excellent decision for a group outing with super shareable dishes for Happy Hour like nachos or queso flameado. What you won’t need to share are the margaritas or 20oz beer schooners (because they’re bigger than your head).

via The Infatuation Feed https://www.theinfatuation.com/austin/guides/best-happy-hour-austin Nhà hàng Hương Sen chuyên buffet hải sản cao cấp✅ Tổ chức tiệc cưới✅ Hội nghị, hội thảo✅ Tiệc lưu động✅ Sự kiện mang tầm cỡ quốc gia 52 Phố Miếu Đầm, Mễ Trì, Nam Từ Liêm, Hà Nội http://huongsen.vn/ 0904988999 http://huongsen.vn/to-chuc-tiec-hoi-nghi/ https://trello.com/userhuongsen

Created August 29, 2020 at 01:42AM /huong sen View Google Doc Nhà hàng Hương Sen chuyên buffet hải sản cao cấp✅ Tổ chức tiệc cưới✅ Hội nghị, hội thảo✅ Tiệc lưu động✅ Sự kiện mang tầm cỡ quốc gia 52 Phố Miếu Đầm, Mễ Trì, Nam Từ Liêm, Hà Nội http://huongsen.vn/ 0904988999 http://huongsen.vn/to-chuc-tiec-hoi-nghi/ https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1xa6sRugRZk4MDSyctcqusGYBv1lXYkrF

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phillymakerfaire · 4 years

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Break Through is a podcast series about making. Making discoveries, making a difference in the community and making the world a better place. It’s the stories of startups and inventors who are developing products that have social value by solving real world problems. It’s about artisans and entrepreneurs who have broken through the mold to live their best lives.

Welcome to episode number six of Breakthrough, A NextFab made podcast series. I’m your host, Ron Bauman, founder of Milk Street Marketing, and NextFab member. Our guest in this episode is Ethan Feinstein of Philadelphia Drum Company. Ethan builds custom drums through a collaborative process with other musicians in the local scene. Each drum is handmade and tailored to help drummers discover their unique tone. We started by talking about the first kit he built for a fellow drummer, what it’s like to be part of the Philadelphia drum community and what it’s like to be a new business owner.

Ron Bauman: So Ethan, thanks for joining us here today at NextFab South Philadelphia.

Ethan Feinstein: Thank you so much for having me.

Ron Bauman: We appreciate you taking the time to speak with us today.

Ethan Feinstein: Anytime.

Ron Bauman: So why don’t you tell us a little bit about yourself and Philadelphia Drum Company.

Ethan Feinstein: Sure. So I am Ethan. I’ve been playing drums for the last 17 years. I’ve been performing for about the last 10 or 11 years and I’ve been teaching drums for the last eight or nine, and about four and a half years ago, I started getting interested in trying to get a little bit more personal with my drum sound, since pretty much every aspect of my life already involved drums. So I figured why not take on one more aspect of it and actually get down to the science of the drums themselves. So I started experimenting with the help of a good friend of mine named Pete Brown, who was actually a member here at the time. And he helped me out with that first build, kind of got me going and also made me aware of the space. And after that, I started working here, just experimenting, trying to get down the process.

Ethan Feinstein: And before long, after I had made my first, I guess it was a snare drum, a friend of mine asked me if I would build a full kit for him. Before I even knew whether I could do it or not, I said, “You know what? I’ll give it a try.” And it took me about a year and a half to build that full kit. But over the course of that, it taught me what I needed to know to kind of get the art of drum building off the ground.

Ron Bauman: Work out all of the kinks?

Ethan Feinstein: Yeah, kind of learn all the problems that I was going to run into. The first build was really about discovering everything that I could do wrong, and then learning how to correct those mistakes. And shortly after that, some friends of mine named Ben and Nisha approached me about turning this into a business. And so the three of us worked together to get the Philadelphia Drum Company off the ground. And from there, you know, we’ve been working to keep going.

Ron Bauman: So that’s a relatively new endeavor. I think you just launched a brand, launch the company a few months ago, if I remember correctly?

Ethan Feinstein: About six months ago was our official launch and we just got our online site up and running. Actually, the store portion of our online site, running a couple of weeks ago actually. So we can officially sell online.

Ron Bauman: Philadelphiadrumcompany.com?

Ethan Feinstein: Actually, it’s www.phillydrumco.com.

Ron Bauman: Phillydrumco.com.

Ethan Feinstein: Short and simple.

Ron Bauman: Gotcha, gotcha. So how’s it been so far? What’s it like to be a newly minted business owner?

Ethan Feinstein: Well it’s been great. I’ve really enjoyed it. Being a part of the Philadelphia music community, I’m surrounded by drummers all the time. Being that I am a drummer, most of my friends are drummers and so it feels really good to have something that is about bringing the Philadelphia drum community together. And that’s really been what it’s been all about so far. Getting the word out, just feeling the excitement of Philadelphia drummers to have a drum company in their city, because there hasn’t really been anything like this. And I think people are just really excited about having handmade instruments that they can interact with, and get really personal with. So it’s been great to just feel that excitement and get to interact with all sorts of different people about drums.

Ron Bauman: So did you ever see yourself as a business owner?

Ethan Feinstein: Not at all. I see myself as an artist. I always have and really I still do. I never intended to start a business with drum building, but it seemed to be the kind of thing where once I started doing it, there was a clear need for it in the area, and just enough excitement around the idea, that I felt like when I was approached by my partners to start a company, it felt like it was a good way to continue my art form and try to make it more sustainable.

Ethan went on to talk about this love for nature, trees, and wood, and how building drums for others is where he finds his true purpose.

Ethan Feinstein: Well, I think aside from music, which has been a huge source of inspiration for me throughout my life, I find a lot of inspiration just in nature and in the natural environment. And one of the cool ways that that has translated into drum building is, I’ve always had a love for trees and a love for wood. And so it’s kind of encouraged me to go deeper into understanding different varieties of trees, different ecosystems, and also understand what kind of woods are more sustainable to harvest, and what not. And so it’s kind of tied my love of nature and being along with my love of music.

Ron Bauman: I think with guitars you can get different tones, tonalities from different types of wood. Is it the same with drums?

Ethan Feinstein: Certainly. And in a lot of ways, even more so. Because drums, similar to an acoustic guitar, actually, drums are an acoustic instrument. So there’s no electronics involved with the actual tone. And so when a drum is resonating, it’s resonating the wood, it’s resonating the metal, and it’s resonating the head. And so, the wood really plays a large effect in the overall tone in the drum.

Ron Bauman: And what’s your favorite board to work with?

Ethan Feinstein: Tough question.

Ron Bauman: You work with multiple types of woods?

Ethan Feinstein: I work with all different kinds. I’ve really been in love with a black walnut at the moment, partially because it’s a beautiful wood. Second, because it’s a domestic species, so it’s found in our area. And third, because as a species, it actually grows quite rapidly and it puts out a certain toxin into the soil that makes it difficult for certain other trees to grow. And so when harvested responsibly, it actually works well as something that humans can have a relationship with.

Ron Bauman: A sustainable?

Ethan Feinstein: Yes. Sustainable relationship with.

Ron Bauman: Awesome. So a few years ago, you decided that you wanted to build your own drum kit. And if I remember the story correctly, because obviously, we’ve known each other for a little bit now, and I’ve heard you talk about this. You mentioned you were approached by a friend of yours to build him a kit.

Ethan Feinstein: Yeah, totally.

Ron Bauman: So you never got to finish your kit. You ended up building your friend’s kit first, and then at that point, was that sort of the nexus where you said, “Maybe this is something I could do for a living or could it provide income for me?” Or for you, I should say.

Ethan Feinstein: And it’s never really been about the income. Because you know, for me, being a musician, it’s kind of like your whole life is both your work and your passion.

Ron Bauman: Sure.

Ethan Feinstein: And so I look at drum building the same way. But it was definitely in building a kit for someone else and seeing how excited they got about it and how excited I got about it. It really got me hooked on building, not just for myself, but for other people. And it feels really great, especially when you can see someone else play and express themselves joyfully with an instrument that you made, with your two hands. So I’ve really been all about building drums for other people, even more so than for myself.

Ron Bauman: That’s awesome. Now did you have an interest in woodworking? I mean, did you have experience building things, making things growing up? I mean, where did that skill set come from?

Ron Bauman: I’ve always loved working with my hands, and working with wood, although I never really got into working in a wood shop environment, until I started working at NextFab. So I used to do mostly hobbies, you know, building things in my backyard, things like that. And when I really wanted to start building drums, that’s when I started really getting determined to learn all the different tools that I needed in the woodshop. And so I really owe a lot to NextFab and the people here, because throughout the process, I’d get all sorts of advice from everyone, from staff members to fellow coworkers in the space, who I can bounce ideas off of and get advice. And it’s really helped me come a long way in the last few years.

Ron Bauman: So that community aspect here at NextFab. You’re running in some pretty creative circles here, between the Philly music scene and all the members and community here at NextFab.

Ethan Feinstein: Definitely, definitely. And like I said, it was actually a mutual friend of mine who also was a worker here in the space, that got me involved. And as soon as I signed up, I immediately started meeting more and more people that I knew or were connected in through various circles.

Ron Bauman: Right, so when you signed up as a member, did you sort of test the waters at first and just join up for say maybe one of the lower level memberships, or did you know right away like, “I want to be here all the time?”

Ethan Feinstein: No, I did that. I started with just three days a month, but very quickly, I upped my membership. Because as soon as I got here, I knew that this was a space that I wanted to be in pretty frequently.

Are you a creative entrepreneur or artisan in the Philadelphia area? Do you want to connect with the creative community that will push you further and support your vision? NextFab is a community where artisans and entrepreneurs help each other learn new crafts, build business, and create new products. Coming in 2020, to the newly revitalized Kensington neighborhood. NextFab is opening up its flagship location for the creative maker. The space will offer over 30,000 square feet of shared workshops for jewelry making, textiles, woodworking, welding as well as private studio space. Visit nextfab.com/1800 to sign up for updates about our grand opening. That’s nextfab.com/1800. If you want to make it better, we can help. We look forward to meeting you.

Ethan and I then discussed his process, and the vital role that NextFab plays in his drum building. From always having the right tools at his fingertips, to receiving advice from other members and staff. And he also told us why he doesn’t make his own drumsticks.

Ethan Feinstein: Oh man, so many ways, really. To start, like I said, they really just helped me acquire the skills that I needed to achieve the goal that I was going for. And along the way, I can’t thank the NextFab people enough for instilling safety precautions into to me.

Ron Bauman: Safety first.

Ethan Feinstein: Seriously. I probably would have cut my finger off three times, if it weren’t for all the advice that they had given me. So just my personal safety, you know, that’s a big part.

Ron Bauman: And you need those fingers, you need those.

Ethan Feinstein: Definitely, as a builder and as a drummer. And then from there, you know, the community aspect has really helped me start to progress, as a business. Because I’ve actually met other members that have become a part of the company in different ways. I met a furniture builder here named Greg Maser, who actually has started helping me in the wood shop, because a lot of his skills as a furniture builder were able to translate quickly into some of the stuff that I was doing.

Ethan Feinstein: And so being able to have other skilled workers around me that I can reach out to was a huge part in kind of starting to up my production. And then from there, I just know that any sort of a new idea that I want to prototype. I’m starting to move into the metalworking and hardware. I know that I can approach them and I already have started talking with them. Whatever I’m looking at next, whether it be laser cutting or welding or just general metalworking, they’re always there to help me get to that next step.

Ron Bauman: Yeah, I was going to ask, outside of woodworking, what other departments are you working in? Are you doing the fixtures or the closures? Are you using the metal shop for any of that?

Ethan Feinstein: So the wood shop is definitely my home, primarily.

Ron Bauman: Sure.

Ethan Feinstein: Outside of that, I’ve started using the jewelry studio in North Philly a lot. I use that to laser engrave my drum badges and so there’s some minor metalworking involved. I laser engrave it and then punch it out, sand it down, and set it in the drum. I also do minor hardware modifications. If I get a piece of hardware and it needs to be changed or modified, I’ll do that in the metal shop. But I’m hoping to, very soon start, actually building the hardware pieces, themselves, in the metal shop. But that’s kind of over this next year, kind of going to be some of my goals that I’m working on.

Ron Bauman: So do you make your own drum sticks as well?

Ethan Feinstein: I do not, but maybe one day in the future. I hope so.

Ron Bauman: Why? Is there something with the drumsticks?

Ethan Feinstein: Well, every, every bit of a drummer’s gear is very particular. And drumsticks are one of the most important parts. And so they have to be crafted just right. They have to be made to the right specifications, the right weight, and it’s very particular. So the way that I would approach building a drum, where everything’s got to be just right in order to get the right drum sound, is the same way I approach a drum stick. To me, even though it seems like a simple part of the process, I think it takes just as much work to make that as it does to make a drum.

Our chat finished with Ethan’s advice for aspiring drummers, the future of Philadelphia Drum Company, and his other musical projects.

Ron Bauman: And you’ve mentioned North Philly, you work primarily out of the North Philly location?

Ethan Feinstein: Yeah. I joined NextFab in 2015, pretty much right after the North Philly location opened up. And so I kind of quickly set up my shop there, and have all of my jigs and my tools and my various different pieces of drum building hardware up there.

Ron Bauman: Are you excited for the opening of the new location?

Ethan Feinstein: Oh, I can’t wait. I was just talking to someone else saying when it opens, I’m going to be trying to get one of the rental rooms there-

Ron Bauman: Sure yeah, project spaces.

Ethan Feinstein: To have something like an official office for Philadelphia Drum Co.

Ron Bauman: That’d be great.

Ethan Feinstein: That’d be awesome. And also, I’m just excited about having the spray booth up there, an expanded facility and hopefully extended hours, just everything. I feel like as that facility grows, my business will be able to grow as well.

Ron Bauman: Awesome. And you’ve recently taken on an apprentice, I understand?

Ethan Feinstein: Yeah. So one of my drum students that I’ve had for a very long time, his name is Kyle, has started helping me. He loves drums. He loves every aspect of drums, and the science, and the building behind it. And so he started helping me handful of times a month, where I’m slowly but surely teaching him the different processes. I think within the next couple of years, he’ll be able to get to the point where he can help actually build them with me as well.

Ron Bauman: That’s awesome. So what advice would you give to a young budding entrepreneur who may be in the artisanal space or really just in general? Somebody who may be thinking about joining NextFab, maybe has an idea for a project?

Ethan Feinstein: My whole approach to building business and art in general, is that you should enjoy every step of the process. To me, the ends should never justify the means. So you should always have goals and you should always be driven by your goals, but you should make sure to enjoy every step of the process, so that even if the goal that you reach isn’t the one that you intended to, you still enjoyed it along the way, and have felt the whole thing was worthwhile. And that’s the way I try to approach this, try to make every day that I’m in the shop a good day and try to learn something every day so that the whole experience is just something that feels worthwhile. Whether or not it becomes something that is a lifelong hobby, whatever it is, I’ll be enjoying it the whole way.

Ron Bauman: That’s awesome. So I want to make sure we do get a quick plug in for Out of the BeardSpace and Beard Fest.

Ethan Feinstein: Sure.

Ron Bauman: You want to tell us a little bit about how things are going with the band and the festival?

Ethan Feinstein: Yeah, sure. So aside from the drum company, I also am in a band called Out of the Beard Space, and another band called PanSong.

Ron Bauman: Oh yeah that’s right. Can’t forget about PanSong.

Ethan Feinstein: And a third band as well called Deep Creature. So many different bands.

Ron Bauman: Oh of course, you drummers are hard to find.

Ethan Feinstein: And we run a festival in Hammonton, New Jersey. It’s the third weekend of June. June 13th through the 16th, I believe, this year. And it is a three day art and music festival run by my band. We have 30 different bands. We have workshops. It’s right on the beach in the Pine Barrens, which you don’t usually think of there being beaches in the Pine Barrens, but anyone been in the Pine Barrens knows some really beautiful spots in there. And so we’ll just camp out and just make art and music for three days. We have a lot of nationally touring acts, everyone from The New Deal, to Go Snow, Anomaly, all sorts of just great acts. A lot of Philly bands will be there, and we try to just get a great mix of our favorite music and a mix of local and national talent. And so yeah, it’s going to be fun time.

Ron Bauman: That’s awesome. Awesome. Well Ethan, thank you very much for taking the time to speak with us today.

Ethan Feinstein: My pleasure.

Ron Bauman: Look forward to seeing you around the shop.

Ethan Feinstein: Thank you. All right.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Breakthrough. I’m your host, Ron Bauman, serial entrepreneur, founder of Milk Street Marketing and Next Fab member. If you are enjoying our show, be sure to subscribe on your favorite podcast app and leave us a review. To learn more about how NextFab can help make your ideas come to life, visit nextfab.com, and follow #NextFabMade on social, to see what our members are making. Come back for our next episode, featuring Jessie Garcia of Tozuda, who developed a head impact sensor to help detect concussions in sports and in the workplace.

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