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#But i still never ... Changed it? To this day i haven't. I have my online name having an mr in it but i always give my name and i mean

animentality · 2 hours

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not to be a boomer, but I do worry about the current generation of kids being raised with iPads.

first off. some of them literally can't hold a pencil because their parents never gave them physical toys to grip and play with, developing their fine motor skills.

you might ask why do we even need to learn how to write physically anymore- well, frankly, because if you're stranded on an island somewhere and you need to write HELP, you might not have the strength to hold a pencil, but you can at least hold a stick.

but on a more general note.

writing by hand helps you remember things better. it forces you to focus in a way that typing something word for word does not. a person can transcribe what a professor says without even thinking about it.

someone writing notes has to consider what to write and what to omit. it also activates more parts of your brain, forcing you to flex the parts of your brain related to learning and communicating, while also engaging the part of your brain dedicated to muscle control and precision.

but in general, I think the issue isn't even oh technology is bad and kids are getting dumber.

you can have PowerPoints AND take physical notes. that could help you learn even better than the olden days where you just had to remember everything that was thrown at you. or read very limited, out of date books.

the problem is that the generation that raised/is raising this generation of children just doesn't understand the true impact that all this technology will have on their kids. or they just don't care.

because our generation had the internet yes, but it wasn't widely accessible for most of us, sharing our computers with the entire family in the kitchen. it was also the internet in its infancy, where it wasn't quite so predatory, when it was lawless and disturbing, yes, but it wasn't weaponized by corporations trying to sell you things and steal your data, it wasn't flooded with bots and ai and all sorts of things that the human brain can't even distinguish as real or fake, especially when you're just a little kid.

that generation still played with physical toys. we celebrated when it snowed and we could stay home.

we also came from a gen that still, vaguely, cared about some form of community and had third spaces for kids to hang out.

90s children, who still had some memories of both playing outside on a playground and playing Mario Kart on the Nintendo 64 with their friends, who both went out to the mall and had a club penguin account.

we grew up with laptops and smart boards. maybe some of us had them in high school or college, but we still physically went to class and developed relationships. learned uncomfortable things about ourselves and others, the way humans do.

met new people and were exposed to new ideas, away from our parents. but not from some fucking influencer trying to sell us Sephora products.

we had to study for things, instead of just being able to Google shit for some bullshit online test.

which is also something that really concerns me. so many kids today can so easily Google answers for every test, and while tests don't ultimately matter in the real world, they still provide some basis for things that do matter.

like I'm just imagining medical students googling how to perform an appendectomy on the day of, and just using a YouTube tutorial to guide them through, and shuddering.

there are some things that the Internet can't teach you.

there always will be.

but I don't think my generation is really helping their kids find the balance that we were given naturally growing up.

the boomers and gen xers had fist fights and we had bullying someone online until they committed suicide.

and now kids use AI to spread fake nudes of girls.

but the laws haven't caught up with a lot of this stuff yet, and certainly won't while we have dinosaurs running our government. and culture takes even longer to change than laws.

I also worry because I know how badly covid affected kids worldwide. how they struggle to read and do math, because remote learning just isn't good for kids.

and I can't even blame them!! I literally teleworked for 4 years and even I can admit that I'm not nearly as good at focusing at home as I am in the office.

it's hard for kids with social anxiety and disabilities, yes I know, I know, trust me, I have social anxiety, and as a hybrid worker ATM, I highly doubt I'd be able to handle 5 days a week in the office.

but it's also not particularly good for kids to stay home ALL the time, entertaining themselves in their room and never being challenged, and never meeting people other than their parents.

the iPad is more of a symbol of that problem than the direct problem.

if your entire... world view is limited to what you can see on your iPad... I mean what a terrible world view you'll have.

you're a 10 year old using TikTok and all you ever see is the same opinion over and over until you can scarcely comprehend people who have an opposing opinion.

you see fake videos that seem so real. that must be real, and so comforting, aren't they, those videos that seem so real?

you let 30 year old influencers who are trying to grift people shape your world view.

and it's not even your fault.

your parents aren't doing anything to help you.

you're young and you're being barraged with entertainment and fake educational videos and how to guides that accidentally create mustard gas in your toilet.

your parents should be teaching you to find a balance between these things. they should be telling you what's real and caution you about the things you see.

they should limit your fucking time on the iPad actually. take you to a fucking park and let you roll in the mud or some shit.

and then when you're a teenager and a young adult, then you can start deciding for yourself what you believe.

but a lot of these weird millennial/gen z parents, man. just let your 1 year old scroll through vids on TikTok while you don't even talk to them or look at them once.

maybe it's because they don't see the harm in it, but I don't get it.

adults can watch TikTok all day and know, ahhh this is bad for me. I'm not doing anything I actually want to be doing.

adults can see other adults doing dumb shit and say ah you're sponsored. someone paid you money to say and do that. silly.

but kids are just kids.

they don't have discipline and frankly, that's not their responsibility. that is yours.

you should be teaching them that they can't have everything in life at their finger tips at all times, actually.

the iPad doesn't solve all of your problems, nor will it think critically for you.

so I worry about if humanity can really keep up with its own technology.

our species is still in its infancy, believe it or not.

so maybe these are just growing pains, and future generations will be able to look back on this era and know the proper balance.

but as someone living in 2024.

I wonder just how much pain is left before we really mature and either make it or break it.

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atruththatyoudeny · 2 days

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Happy 28th! Here are all the lovely fics I read this month:

where we landed | blueskiesrry | [70k] The leaves were green the last time Harry stepped foot in Holmes Chapel, a stark contrast to the candy apple, butterscotch painting them now, years later. Harry first notices them on the train, gazing out the window with a downturned mouth. A warm something floods his stomach–memories, Harry imagines, of him as a boy, longing for the days when he’d live elsewhere and have to take this very train home for the holidays. He wonders how it’s possible to have once felt eager and euphoric at the sight of changing leaves yet now to feel nothing but tired. He sighs softly, turning away from the trees to look at his daughter, half-curled in his lap, asleep. or: harry returns to his hometown with his sick daughter and more reminders than he bargained for of the boy he once loved when he left a handful of years ago

MARRIED FOR A WEEK?! | gravitycentered | [20k] Hi guys :) You might recognize Harry from one or two of my old videos .. I was tagged in the Married for a week challenge so I asked him to be my husband ! We had to live together for a week and take each other out on a couple romantic dates and that, check out the video to see how it went :) Give it a like if you enjoyed and maybe subscribe if you haven't already. Love you all - Louis x

It's everything else that matters | words_of_my_own | [83k] At forty, Harry has settled down in London, as a single dad and successful businessman. Along comes Louis, his son’s new friend, who turns out to be more than he appears at first sight. Their paths are slowly intertwined as life stories are unfolded and feelings arise. *** "They may only be joking around here… …or the atmosphere has just turned slightly flirtatious. Louis' raised eyebrow and quirky smile adding on to it. It’s fun and exciting, and Harry doesn’t think twice before he throws another glance over his shoulder, just to find Louis steady eyes on him, his teeth digging into his lower lip. Christ, the bloke really is handsome. Sexy, even. And this is definitely not how Harry normally reacts to people of the same sex, but…apparently, he is now."

He Was a Different League (When I Was Nothing Much) | AFangirlFantasy | [21k] Sick of being alone, Marcel is forced (by Niall) to join an online dating app. The idea is well and all, except for the inconvenient fact that he hasn’t moved on from his childhood sweetheart - Louis. If only Marcel could learn to let go, he might actually be able to love again. Or, an AU where finding that 'someone new' actually leads to finding that 'someone old,' and Marcel is painfully oblivious.

I want to wake up where your love is | marcythesassykitten | [166k] “Kinda feels like it is, though. And it’s okay to be pissed at me because of that,” Louis' voice was still the normal feathery sweetness Harry was used to, but it had a harshness to it that he couldn’t place until he looked up and met Louis’ eyes. There was so much pain exposed for Harry to see, for him to be able to pick at, taunt or ignore. Louis was sitting right there, allowing Harry to see all the broken pieces, the sharp edges that had never been mended back together with the love and kindness they needed. In that moment, Harry saw his own pain reflected back at him in Louis’ eyes. He could feel bits of his own heart calling out for him to reach out and allow the two battered hearts to heal together as one. “It’s not. I’m not… I’m really not,” or, a chicago-inspired story about lost dreams, unjust fates, undying love and lots of pizza, repressed feelings, cute kids and, of course, cats

Welcome Home | Jelon | [49k] Louis Tomlinson had to put a stop to his football career for a couple of months and he decided to go back home to rest his mind for a little bit only to find out a really weird coffee shop owner started to visit his mother on a regular basis with just as peculiar but lovely kid named Maxine.

Half a World Away | SilverStuff50 | [10k] Bothy: A bothy is a basic shelter, usually left unlocked and available for anyone to use free of charge. It was also a term for basic accommodation, usually for gardeners or other workers on an estate. Bothies are found in remote mountainous areas of Scotland, Northern England, Ulster and Wales. They are particularly common in the Scottish Highlands, but related buildings can be found around the world (for example, in the Nordic countries, there are wilderness huts).

#28th appreciation #fic rec #monthly reads #my reads #monthly fic rec #larry fics

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 6 months

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AITA for not having time to read my mutual's writing?

Met a mutual on here, bonded through fanfic, have been tight with them for a few years with pretty much no bumps in the relationship, just overall had a really good time hanging around them when I could. We both write a lot and share our writing, and occasionally we talk about that writing/workshop it in passing.

In the past few years I've gone through a ton of life changes. Most notably I went from a multi-person household to a single-person one, and I've been living alone in a prohibitively costly city for a while now working 40 hour weeks and barely scraping by. As soon as the transition started I spent the last of my free income on a shitty little laptop so I could still write, putting down words on my bus/train commutes in the morning and quite literally writing on my breaks at work because I feel insane when I can't create. I bring this up to really stress that I don't have the time for the hobby, I force myself to make the time and even then it never feels like enough.

The only thing I can really stand to do with my 3 hours of free time at night is hang out with my moots online. I'm an extrovert so being around people recharges me. If I don't have designated social time I get super depressed and can pretty much feel my soul withering away. I also feel like I should probably mention that I kinda have a slew of mental issues, personality disorders and PTSD and AuDHD and the works. Point being, shit is rough my dude, but I am a person who likes to work hard and face challenges head on and even though we strugglin, we doing it with a positive outlook.

But! I am an incredibly solution-oriented person and I have found what I personally believe to be a good balance. No one should have to live like this, but I do, and I have found a way to be happy. My writing and my social time is all load-bearing. It is not something I just choose to do on a whim, it's all planned and scheduled and I adhere to those routines very strictly because, I cannot stress this enough, I will go fucking bonkers if I don't.

I'm mutuals with a lot of writers obv, and I sadly don't have time to read their work anymore, unless I get some extra time on my days off or something gets cancelled or like, I end up taking a vacation. I carry a great amount of guilt for this, though, even though I logically know it's reasonable. I try to support them where I can, cheer them on when I see them writing and tell them how cool their ideas sound, hype them up even when I can't actually read & review.

One of the things I do is sometimes I leave a kudos on fic I haven't read. I'm not trying to be ingenuine, and if they asked me I'd tell them like 'Oh I didn't read it yet, just wanted to show support!' but to me it's kinda like ripping a paper tab off a poster so that other's feel inclined to do the same. Plus my pals get a little email and a hit of serotonin.

Except one of my acquaintances, the one I mentioned at the start here, saw that I left kudos on a couple pieces another mutual of mine wrote this year. They more or less blew up my DMs with a ton of accusatory (like, literally presented like a 'GOTCHA!') stuff about how I was selective in who's fic I read, more or less implying that I secretly held some sort of grudge or negative feeling toward them and was making the conscious decision not to read or interact with their writing because of. Something, I don't actually know what they were trying to say. They also told me they vented to their friends about this MULTIPLE times, but they never once approached me to let me know they were feeling paranoid or neglected, they literally just took the most bad faith reading of it possible and then presented that to me like it was something I intentionally did, while the whole time I was unaware.

I tried to explain to them the kudos thing, that I didn't do it to every story, just ones I caught/noticed in my busy schedule. And I laid all this out and asked, multiple times, what free time am I supposed to read with? They didn't answer, and doubled down, kept trying to show me 'proof' that I was shorting them and no one else. Once they started to realize how wrong they were they backed down, but they didn't really apologize, or admit they were wrong, and they tried to end our relationship and left every single server we were in together. Because of some other unrelated stuff going on in my life, I didn't really consider them to be a close friend, but they were someone I really held dear and would've walked through hell for if they'd asked.

I still feel like there is something I'm missing here, and that's why I wanted to ask if I'm TA. I'm a pretty good communicator but one of the things I told myself when talking down my disordered thoughts (guilt about this prior) was "no one in their right mind would use reading fanfic as a metric for friendship." Now that I've had that exact thing happen, I'm starting to think maybe those thoughts weren't so disordered. Maybe this IS a big deal, and I should think about it more, but I don't even know what the solution to that would be. I just. Don't have time to read something lovingly crafted and appreciate it for what it is. All the hours in my week are used up, I'd have to lose sleep for this and with my mental health the way it is that is not an option.

Feel free to be a brutal, my skin is thick. Thanks!

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 months

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Pairing : Han Jisung x F!Reader TW : anonymous friends to lovers type beat ; physical fighting ; reader is bullied ; angst ; fluffy ending ; Word Count : 8.9k A/N : Haven't even started writing this one yet but I know it's gonna take a bit, I hope the wait is worth it!! I hope that this is good! I kind of changed things a little bit, but I feel like it's still good... right? It has a k-drama feel to it... Not proof read!! Request : Anonny : Hello! If your requests are open can you write something for skz han? Where han is a popular person that everyone likes and he doesn't know the identity of reader but they are able to have really nice conversations. He thinks he found the person he's been talking to and starts dating them and reader agrees to help the person with talking to him. But han actually starts talking to reader and realizes that they were the person he fell in love with. Reader didn't tell him their true identity bc they were told he could never love someone like them. I hope that makes sense.

An anonymous chat room… What could possibly go wrong? It had started as a way for other students to get help with certain subjects without the judgment of their peers over not knowing enough. Soon enough, like most things, it had completely lost its original reason for being made, and now it was being used for anything but studying. There were chat rooms for dissing people, chat rooms for hooking up, and then there was the more… safe chat rooms, for people that were just lonely and wanting to talk, people that were too awkward or shy to have conversations face to face. Everyone had an online identity that no one else knew about… A different persona… It was scary… But sometimes it was nice to just… Talk to someone.

JiHizzy : Hey! You online?

Your phone vibrated with the message, and you couldn’t help but smile at the familiar sound of the notification. You had been talking to him for weeks now, and it was the one part of your day that you truly looked forward to.

JustAnotherGirl : Yeah! What’s up?

JiHizzy : Finally got back to my dorm. I was trying to study for finals…

JustAnotherGirl : I’m gonna guess that didn’t work out for you?

JiHizzy : Crazily enough, I ended up at the bar instead of the library.

JustAnotherGirl : I don’t know how you could possibly get the two confused lol

JiHizzy : It’s a friday night, I don’t think anyone was at the library. Weren’t you at the bar too? It was packed.

JustAnotherGirl : Mm… Nope! I don’t really party like that, I was too busy studying for my finals.

JiHizzy : Ooh, the innocent type? I like that.

JustAnotherGirl : Are you flirting with me?

JiHizzy : I might be… You know the acronym of your username is jag… all you need is I and you’d be jagi to me.

JustAnotherGirl : That must be the alcohol talking…

JiHizzy : Not at all. You’re just my type. I really want to meet you.

JustAnotherGirl : Oh, would you look at the time? We should get some sleep! Goodnight!

While it was supposed to stay an anonymous chat room, some people were just too popular to stay hidden longer than the first week. One of those people was JiHizzy, better known as Han Jisung, the most popular guy on campus simply because of his looks. All of the girls wanted him, and all of the guys wanted to be him. He was the top of the totem pole, and that put you at the very bottom.

If the two of you were to walk past each other on campus, he wouldn’t even spare you a passing glance… But with the promise of anonymity, you were able to talk to him every night. You were able to know what it felt like to be liked by someone like him. You could never meet him though, if he found out who you really were… He’d stop talking to you immediately. You didn’t want to lose him… Even if you didn’t truly have him.

///

JiHizzy : Are you in class right now?

In the silence of the classroom, the vibration of your phone was much louder than you thought it would be. Everyone turned to look in your direction, and you quickly grabbed your phone and placed it on your lap, hoping that if another message came in, it would be silent.

JiHizzy : I know you are, you’re such a good girl… WAIT DOES THAT SOUND WEIRD!? I’M SORRY!!

JiHizzy : I was just thinking that maybe… Maybe you could tell me what class you’re in…

JiHizzy : And I could get a glimpse of you… Or who I think is you… I just want to have a face to go with the name…

You held in your sigh as you felt your phone vibrate incessantly against your lap, chewing on your bottom lip as you attempted to focus on your studies, but it seemed like he wouldn’t let up unless you responded.

JiHizzy : PLEASE!!

JustAnotherGirl : Why is it so important? I like being anonymous… I like talking to you…

JiHizzy : Because I like you, and I can’t stop thinking about you, and I want to daydream about you…

JiHizzy : But it’s kind of hard to daydream about someone if I don’t know what they look like.

JustAnotherGirl : Well, daydream about what you think I look like. It’s probably better than how I really look anyway.

JiHizzy : You’re talking like I’ll stop messaging you or stop liking you if I meet you…

JiHizzy : You don’t think I’m that kind of person… Do you?

JustAnotherGirl : I don’t know who you are… But it’s just easier like this for me…

JiHizzy : Alright alright

JiHizzy : I’m sorry if I upset you…

JiHizzy : But hey! I heard that they’re releasing an update soon where we can actually talk to each other on the phone!

JustAnotherGirl : Can’t people tell who other people are by their voice?

JiHizzy : Idk… But I want to call you when it comes out. Can we at least do that?

JustAnotherGirl : Maybe… I’ll think about it… I have to study now. So do you!

JiHizzy : Right! Okay, I’ll message you later!

He daydreamed about you… He thought about you… You wondered what this image looked like, the girl that he thought you were. You were sure that it looked nothing like you, and it was better that way. He was so popular, you didn’t want to tarnish his image if he was even seen talking with you, let alone walking beside you… although you were sure that something like that would never happen.

///

When the call feature was released, everyone was so excited. People were testing it out as soon as their apps updated… But you were dreading it. Texting guaranteed staying anonymous, but hearing someone's voice, even if they didn’t know what you looked like, a voice was a way to identify someone. Even Jisungs voice, anyone and everyone could tell it was him coming if they heard him talking. His voice was distinct, it was his and his only. You didn’t know how distinct your voice would be, and the only thing you had going for you was the fact that you didn’t talk much at all.

A time that you’d usually be counting down to now had your stomach twisted up into knots, your knees folded up against your chest as you tried to think of anything but the inevitable phone call that you knew he would ask for. “What’s got you all worked up?” Your roommate asked as she walked into your room. As if things couldn’t get any worse, she just had to be back in at a normal hour.

Of course you had gotten paired up to dorm with the most popular girl on campus, it was just another way of lifes mysterious twists and turns supposedly. She was absolutely ruthless, and while you had asked to have your room changed at the beginning of every semester, it miraculously could never be done. As if college wasn’t hard enough, having to reside with her was just added stress.

“Fine. Ignore me. I didn’t want to talk to you anyway.” She mumbled, dropping down onto the ridiculously large and disgustingly luxurious bed that took up almost the entirety of her half of the room. She was rich, of course she was, and she took every opportunity to flaunt her wealth to everyone on campus, and you were no exception, you just got the brunt of it.

“I’m gonna take a shower real quick… Do you have to use the bathroom before I get in?” You asked, keeping your head down so she didn’t look at you like the peasant that you knew she thought you were. She scoffed loudly, and out of the corner of your eye, you saw her flick her wrist in the direction of the bathroom.

JiHizzy : You awake? Don’t tell me you’re sleeping already!

JiHizzy : You haven’t been online in 3 hours! Come onnnnn!

JiHizzy : Are you ignoring me?!?!?! :(

JiHizzy : Did I do something… Say something wrong?

JiHizzy : Ahhh… Maybe you are sleeping… Okay

JiHizzy : Goodnight! Sleep well!!

You never took your phone into the bathroom with you, not just because it seemed unsanitary or unhygienic, you also couldn’t afford to potentially drop it on the tile floor and bust the screen. Maybe you should have, but again, you didn’t think that your roommate would go through your phone. You were pretty sure that she wouldn’t even touch something that belonged to you. You had never been more wrong.

The vibrating of your phone had caught her attention, and maybe if it had only gone off once she would have ignored it, but Jisung was a spam texter. “Hmm…” She hummed to herself as she snatched your phone off the nightstand, and her curiosity quickly turned to annoyance when she saw just who had been texting you. “No way… There’s no way!” She shrieked, glaring at your phone.

As the story goes, the popular guy should automatically be with the popular girl… that’s how it always goes! She wouldn’t allow something like this to happen… It just couldn’t. She was being a good person, she had to look out for Jisungs reputation, that’s what it was. Luckily everything was anonymous, you were anonymous… He wouldn’t have to be embarrassed to like you… He wouldn’t even have to know it was you.

“What are you doing?” She was still holding your phone as you walked out of the bathroom, and your stomach dropped as you thought about what she could have been doing to your phone. Why would she even have it. “Look… I don’t touch your stuff, please don’t touch mine.” You mumbled as you scurried over to grab your phone out of her hand.

“Jesus, don’t have a tantrum.” She muttered, rolling her eyes as she turned her attention back to her own phone. “Maybe you should silence your notifications before leaving your phone unattended.” Her words only worried you more, prompting you to check what she could have been talking about, and you could feel the anxiousness creeping up further and further until it had taken you over completely.

She had seen the notifications, and you’d be a fool to think that she didn’t know exactly who it was that was messaging you. Would she tell him? It would be absolutely humiliating, it would destroy you, you couldn’t imagine the way he and his friends would react to finding out that it was you who he had been talking to. Should you tell her not to say anything? “I…” No… It might make her say something. Maybe she’ll forget about it in the morning. That would be the best case scenario.

“I think Han Jisung and I would be the perfect couple, right? I mean, we’re both popular, we’re both insanely attractive! That’s why I feel so bad for him, you know? It’s not like he’d willingly go for a complete loser, but this stupid anonymous app is really getting his hopes up.” You were right there, she knew exactly what she was doing, but she still had the audacity to look over at you with the fakest smile. “Were you saying something?”

“N-No…” You stammered, pushing yourself up off your bed and heading to the door. “I’m gonna take a walk, I’ll be back later…” She didn’t say anything to you as you left, simply laughing along with the multitudes of friends that she had on call. Had she told them? Were they all laughing at you? Of course they were, she was right… Why would he want to be with someone like you? You were a nobody, a speck of dust, no… Not even that. People notice dust… you were less than that.

But why didn’t you deserve to be happy, even if that meant staying behind the safety and security of your phone screen and a basic username? Were you not allowed to have anything? Not even some sort of happiness brought by anonymous interaction? Isn’t that how everything on the internet is nowadays anyway? No one really knows each other… So why is it such a big deal if you talk to him? Why should you be shamed for doing it the way you have been? Could you not even have this one thing?

Being outside was like a breath of fresh air, at least for a moment, but those thoughts brought on by the words of your roommate were suffocating. Should you even respond to him? He thought you were sleeping already… you could tell him you had been busy… His messages have the ability to help you feel better in an instant, and you needed that now. You clicked on the notification and quickly typed in your password to open the app, and not even a second passed before your phone was vibrating in your hand.

JiHizzy : Hey! There you are!

JustAnotherGirl : Hm… Were you just sitting and waiting for me to come online?

JiHizzy : and what if I was??

JiHizzy : you know I can’t sleep without talking to you first.

JustAnotherGirl : I didn’t know that though…

JiHizzy : well now you know! :D

JiHizzy : so… the call feature came out! I want to call you! Can I?

JustAnotherGirl : uhm… I don’t know…

JiHizzy : are you in your room? Is your roommate sleeping? I can talk quiet!

JustAnotherGirl : no… no it’s not that…

JiHizzy : I want to hear your voice… please? We can talk about anything! Anything you want!

JustAnotherGirl : I guess…

In a second your phone was buzzing, Jisungs screen name front and center on your screen. What a foolish feature this is, why not just give people your phone number if you’ll just talk on the phone? What’s next? Video calling? What if…? You would never do that… You couldn’t… He wouldn’t want to see you anyway.

Your hands shook as you accepted the call and brought your phone up to your ear. “Hehe, hey! Took you a bit to answer, I thought you’d just ignore me!” His voice came with a face, one that you could perfectly envision in your mind. His smile, the creasing of his eyes as he probably laid back against his pillow, one arm tucked under his head, perfectly at ease with everything. He was so lucky and he probably didn’t even realize it.

“Oh… uh… no. I was just… trying to find somewhere to sit.” You lied, looking around at the line of streetlamps that illuminated the sidewalks that led to different buildings. “H-Hi…” You stammered, and you knew exactly why you were flustered, why you were so nervous. Jisung was practically a GOD here, and you might as well have been an earthworm with how much lower you were than him. If anyone found out about this, you were sure that the both of you would be humiliated, but for vastly different reasons.

“You don’t have a couch or a bed or anything in your dorm?” He asked, and you felt stupid, this whole thing just felt insanely stupid. So what if you didn’t have a couch or a bed in your dorm anyway, not everyone was made of money! What was he going to do, judge you for it? “Well… Look, if you need help or anything… I-”

“I don’t need help.” You stated quickly, and you truly didn’t. Sure, you didn’t have a couch or a flat screen television in your dorm, but you had a bed, and that was more than what most people had, so you had no reason to complain. “I’m actually-” A particularly loud gust of wind whipped around you, the force so strong that you could almost hear it crackling in your speaker, and it whipped up freshly fallen leaves around you.

“Are you outside?” There was a slight panic in his voice, although you weren’t sure why. It’s not like you hadn’t braved elements far more atrocious than wind before. But then again, he didn’t exactly know you well. With the image he had in his mind of you, he probably thought you were too pretty, too perfect to be outside in the wind, potentially getting your hair messed up. “Did you go outside just to talk to me? I-If I knew you were going to do that, I would have just said to wait until a different day to call. I don’t want you to get ill.”

You clicked your tongue against the roof of your mouth. Was he always this caring, or was he just pretending? Only the people closest to him would know, and you weren’t close to him at all. Surely to be as popular as he was, he’d have to be some kind of an asshole… That’s how the movies and the shows always depict the popular guys. They were too good for people like you… But… He didn’t know you were a person… A person like you. “It’s fine, really. I’ve walked home in thunderstorms before… A little gust of wind isn’t going to take me out.”

There was a sigh from his end of the call, and then the rustling of what sounded like sheets or blankets. “Well tell me where you are. You’re already out, and I wouldn’t mind walking a bit to come see you. I really want to know you… I can get my shoes on real quick and-” You hung up the call before he was finished, your breath held in your throat, and you didn’t let it go until you were certain the call was ended. It was rude, sure, of course it was… But why was he so god damn pressed on meeting you!? Why wasn’t this good enough for him too?!

JiHizzy : Did the call cut out? Was it the wind?? Are you okay!?

JiHizzy : If you don’t answer me, I’ll… I don’t know… I’m not a computer wizard but…

JiHizzy : I know people can trace things and… Please tell me you’re okay. I’m worried.

JustAnotherGirl : yeah… I’m fine…

JustAnotherGirl : my phone battery is dying…

JiHizzy : Oh! Okay!

JiHizzy : Get inside quick, please. Charge your phone and message me in the morning… yeah?

JustAnotherGirl : yeah…

JustAnotherGirl : Goodnight…

JiHizzy : Goodnight beautiful!

This was getting worse, it was only going to get harder… Maybe you should cut ties with him now… It would be better that way, wouldn’t it? It wasn’t paying off to selfishly keep him, basically trapped behind your phone screen because you were scared of the embarrassment that would come along with actually meeting him. You needed to let him go…

///

Your roommate was laying in bed, a sheet mask over her face and the bedside table lamp had been dimmed. She was sleeping, at least that’s what you thought, until the door latch clicked as you shut it and she jumped up. “What were you out doing, huh?” The questions immediately started, and you shook your head, going over to your bed and yanking back the blankets. “I know that you weren’t out with… him. He would drop dead before being seen with the likes of you, ya know?”

She snickered annoyingly, and you whipped around, your face scrunched up as you tried to keep the tears at bay. “How? How do you know that? How should I know that?! Do you know him?! Do you really know him?!” You asked, or, more like begged for her to give you the answers. You weren’t really sure why you were going to her of all people, maybe you were just desperate to hear that… that you would be good enough… Maybe not for him… But for someone.

The loud laugh that poured from her lips was like a gut punch, and you dropped down onto your bed, absolutely humiliated, devastated, you felt like a fool. “Listen… I’m gonna do you a favor… You know, since we’re… friends…” This was bound to be an awful idea, you were sure of it, but you felt like she was going to keep talking anyway and… It was beginning to feel like you didn’t have a choice. “I think it’ll be a win for both of us… So, I’ll meet him, as you… And you get to keep talking to him at night. He’ll fall in love with me and my beautiful looks, as everyone always does, and… Well, you won’t be lonely. How does that sound?”

It sounded terrible, it sounded awful, it was an elaborate ruse that surely no one would fall for… But… He wouldn’t ask you to meet him anymore… You’d still talk to him… She wouldn’t bother you or even have a reason to try to embarrass you on campus. You could stay hidden, it could work… It could really work. “Fine…” You mumbled, running your hands over your face, trying not to think too hard. “You… I don’t want to get involved too much with… What the two of you might do… But if he brings it up in the chat… You’ll have to… Tell me…” It was the last thing you’d ever want to know, but if this was going to work, you’d have to give him up just to have him still… It sounded crazy. You’d never have with him what she could… All you would ever be able to have are late night conversations, living out a fantasy through the tellings of your roommate and him. It would have to be good enough.

“Oh, don’t worry… I’ll tell you everything!” She clapped her perfectly manicured nails together, and you knew there was something sinister about it, but this felt like the only way. “Get some sleep, we have a lot of planning to do tomorrow. This is going to be great!”

///

“Where did you tell him to meet me… I mean… you?” She whispered, reading over your shoulder to try to see what the messages on your phone said. This was it… Today was the day… She’d probably tell him to delete the app since he finally met “you”. Was it worth it? Probably not… But you had been alone for the longest time before this all happened, you’d be fine with being alone after this as well. Nothing would change for you… But she would get everything she wanted… As if she didn’t have it all already.

“The… The fountain, at the center of campus…” You mumbled. Would he really think it was you? The two of you sounded nothing alike… But would he be able to pick up on that? Probably not, he didn’t seem like the type that really cared for things like that. He was so excited that you finally agreed to meet him, the messages were flooding in and she had been right there to read all of them.

JiHizzy : I’m on my way to the fountain now!

JiHizzy : I can’t believe this is finally happening… We’ve been talking for almost 4 months now…

JiHizzy : Isn’t this crazy?!?!

JiHizzy : I’m just a little nervous… I hope you don’t mind.

JustAnotherGirl : I don’t… I don’t mind at all…

Have fun… You thought to yourself as you stood at a distance, watching as Jooyi stood at the fountain, switching between sitting on the edge and standing every couple of seconds. She fumbled with the edge of her skirt, and fixed her hair, then checked her makeup. She was nothing like you… Would he be able to notice, even if you had only talked through text and occasionally on the phone? Was he able to tell your personality through little things like that?

Then you saw him, practically sprinting towards the fountain, it was like everything was in slow motion. Did he even know who to look for? Would Jooyi fit the image of you that he created in his mind? You leaned against the light pole, your phone clutched against your chest… One message and you could ruin this all for her… But it would cost you too much, and you would have nothing to show for it, nothing to gain. People like you weren’t made for people like him, he would never stoop so low as to even look in your direction. They were made for each other… Who were you to ruin things?

“Jisung!” You heard her voice ringing in your ears, and you looked up from the pavement to see her waving in his direction, and he paused. Did he know? You watched him closely, and you saw the smile slowly beginning to form on his face before he sprinted over to her. His arms wrapped around her waist in a tight hug, picking her up and spinning her around before setting her on the ground. It would never be you, that could never be you… You made two people happy today… It should feel good, but you felt sick, and you quickly turned away, rushing back to your dorm room. You didn’t have to be there to watch it, you’d hear all about it when she came back.

///

JiHizzy : It was… Wow…

JiHizzy : Finally meeting you in person! It’s amazing!

JustAnotherGirl : Yeah! I’m so happy that I finally got to meet you!

You sniffled softly as you looked over his messages. They wouldn’t be the same again, nothing would. He’d talk about everything that he did with “you”, and you’d just have to respond as if… as if it were truly you there. This… This deal… It wasn’t fair at all. It was just rubbing into your face everything that Jooyi got to do with him… And he was the one unknowingly telling you… She was evil… But she was a master at being just that.

JiHizzy : Well… Do you want to talk on the phone? I mean…

JiHizzy : We’ve already met each other and… I don’t know why…

JiHizzy : I could ask you for your number… But I don’t want to get rid of the app.

JustAnotherGirl : oh? Why?

JiHizzy : There’s just so many memories on here…

JiHizzy : Sometimes when I’m alone or sad… I go back through our messages. You really know how to make me happy…

JustAnotherGirl : Really…?

JiHizzy : Yeah… Really.

JiHizzy : Don’t tell anyone though! The guys would totally mock me for that.

JustAnotherGirl : I won’t… I won’t tell anyone.

Jooyi burst through the door, shopping bags lining her arms and she dropped them carelessly to the floor before falling back onto her bed, a loud, ear piercing squeal escaping her as she kicked her feet. “He’s so amazing! He’s so much cuter up close! He wants to take me on a date this weekend!!” She squealed again, and you felt disgusted. Did he want to take her on a date, or did he want to take you on a date? Was it her looks or was it your personality that he liked?

“I’m… Really happy for you, Jooyi.” You lied through gritted teeth. You hated hearing about it, you hated hearing her in general, but hearing her talk about him as if she was the one who had put in the work over four months to get him to like her… It was unfair. You faked a yawn and rubbed your eyes, acting tired just to be able to wipe your tears without her noticing. “I’m gonna go to the library and study. I’ll see you later.”

She was lost in her own world, but she sat up as you reached the door, your backpack slung over your shoulder and your hand on the doorknob. “Hey!” You put on a smile as you turned to face her, waiting for her to continue. “Did he message you? Did he talk about me? Hmm?”

You felt your phone vibrate in your back pocket, you knew it was him, but you shook your head. “Haven’t heard from him… Maybe he deleted the app… I don’t know. I have to study though, I’ll let you know if he does.” She sighed softly, letting her head fall back against the mattress, she was back in dreamland. Her whole life was a dream… And yours was a nonstop nightmare.

///

The library was practically empty when you walked in, you could hear every squeak of the floorboards as the one or two other students paced the shelves of books. You could almost hear the buzzing of the fluorescent light that hung over your head… You could hear… “Is this seat taken?” The man asked, and you looked up to see Jisung standing next to the chair that was across from you. It was strange, and you looked around at the vast amount of empty tables that filled the large building. Why would he want to sit with you? “I don’t like sitting by myself… I feel like it’s easier to study when I have someone sitting with me.”

Could he read your mind? Pfft, no! That’s impossible. “It’s not taken…” You mumbled, trying to keep your voice low, hoping that he wouldn’t recognize it from the phone calls. You couldn’t even begin to imagine how furious Jooyi would be if she found out about this. Maybe you should just leave. You could study another night. Then your phone vibrated against the table, your heart froze, and Jisung, who had been smiling at his own phone looked up at you.

“Heh… That’s a coincidence. I just sent a message and your phone vibrated!” He said rather cheerfully, and the way he looked at you, it was like he was expecting you to check it. There was no way in hell you’d do that though. You awkwardly giggled, shoving your phone into your backpack as you shook your head.

“Probably an email or something… It is… Ironic though…” You whispered, lowering your head even further into the textbook that you had opened. You felt his eyes linger on you though, like they were burning through you, and you didn’t know whether to feel flustered, nervous, or both those things and everything in between. “D-Do you need something? A pencil… Or-”

“I know you…” He said matter-of-factly, and it was like your throat closed up and your chest tightened. How did he know you? What was he talking about? He couldn’t possibly know you. “You’re the top student… You’re like, mega smart! I can see why now… Do you always study this late?”

Relief, a sigh of relief and a deep breath. You were safe… You shouldn’t overthink too much. “Mmn…” You nodded your head once but kept it bowed, trying to focus on the words in the textbook, but it was so hard. “Thank you…” You added, wondering if maybe that was what he was waiting for.

He chuckled softly, and then you felt the table shake as he dropped his own backpack on the table and started pulling out a bunch of notebooks. “You make it seem so easy. How do you just… Concentrate? It’s so hard for me to do.” He whined, and you looked around as his voice got higher and higher. “Oh… Sorry.” His voice dropped back down to a whisper and then he chuckled softly.

His laugh was contagious and you couldn’t help but laugh along with him, your hand clasping over your mouth to try to muffle the noise. “It’s easy… You just have to find the fun in it.” He rolled his eyes and stuck his tongue out at you and you pursed your lips, trying not to laugh at his reaction. “Seriously. Here, let me show you.”

It was supposed to be a solo study session, honestly, it was just to try to get away from your roommate long enough for her to fall asleep. You never in your wildest dreams expected this to happen. It was like a scene straight out of a k-drama, but you also knew that after these types of scenes, things got bad. But you didn’t want to think about that right now… All you could think about was the way that he laughed with you, the way he smiled at you, the way he talked to you like you were a person and not just the dirt beneath his shoes.

“You remind me of someone.” He said nonchalantly as you both started packing up your books. You blinked a few times, your head tilting to the side as you waited for him to elaborate, but he was looking at his phone, his smile dropping slightly as he turned it off and slid it into his pocket. “Oh… It’s nothing. She must have just fallen asleep. She’s always so tired. She studies a lot… Kind of like you. Maybe you can tutor me… I’ll bring her too! That would be cool, right?” Cool… Not at all. It was the complete opposite of cool. That… That would never work.

“M-Maybe… I don’t know… I tutor a couple other people.” You came up with the lie quickly, and you hated the way his smile almost completely disappeared. Maybe you could make an exception… It’s not like he’d find out… Right? Jooyi would just have to act interested in studying. You were sure that if you told her, she’d be on board… “I’ll… I’ll see if I can schedule you in.”

And just like that, his smile was back and he was pulling his phone out again. “Awesome! Uhm, how about we exchange phone numbers and…” He trailed off when he saw the look on your face, and you were sure that you looked quite uneasy. There was no way that would go over well with Jooyi, she’d flip shit. “How about Anonny… You know the app, right? Everyone has it!” Oh shit… That was even worse.

“How about… We leave it up to fate.” His eyebrow arched, and you were really going out on a limb here with the excuses, but you had to protect yourself… Not just from him, but from Jooyi too. You didn’t have much to lose… But it was enough to have you terrified. “If we both manage to come to the library at the same time, if you see me here, I’ll tutor you. I usually come at night though… Just so you know.”

You bowed your head to him as you got up, putting on your backpack and heading out, and you could hear him following behind you. “I’ll be here. Every night. I’ll study on my own too… Thank you, for helping me.” You hummed in response, pushing open the main door and you were met with a rather brisk gust of wind that had you shivering and shoving your hands into your pockets. “Are you cold? Here…” He shimmied out of his top coat, placing it over your shoulders and smiling when he saw it on you. “You can return it to me next time fate brings us together, okay? Just stay warm, and get home safe.”

For fucks sake…

///

JiHizzy : Hey, whatcha up to?

JiHizzy : It’s been like… 3 hours… Are you mad or something?

JiHizzy : You must be sleeping… I just feel like somethings wrong…

JiHizzy : Let me know when you get this message… Okay?

Your roommate was fast asleep when you finally got in, and you quickly took off Jisungs coat and slid it under your bed, safe for now at least from the prying eyes of Jooyi. As you curled up under your blankets, ready to just fall asleep, ready to let yourself drift off into a world where you didn’t have to pretend and you didn’t have to lie to the man who had sat across from you in the library when there were so many tables to choose from. The man who smiled at you and made you feel like you were the only person in the room. Then your phone vibrated once more from under your pillow.

JiHizzy : I was studying tonight… I know how important it is to you and… I wanted to do it. JiHizzy : I met someone there, she reminded me of you a lot!

JiHizzy : I hope these aren’t waking you up… I know you’re sleeping.

JustAnotherGirl : I was at the library too. We must have just missed each other…

JiHizzy : NO WAY! Dammit! Well…

JiHizzy : I was thinking that we can do study dates. Wouldn’t that be cool?

JustAnotherGirl : It would. I really like that idea.

JiHizzy : Awesome! Okay!

JiHizzy : Goodnight cutie!

Study dates… That’s how you had looked at tonight, or you were just delusional. If tonight had happened sooner… Would you have taken Jooyi up on her deal? He seemed to be just fine with you… He wasn’t embarrassed, he wasn’t ashamed to be sitting across from you and laughing with you… Would he have liked you still if he knew who you really were?

///

“So, how was your night last night? You got home safe?” Jisung asked and you heard Jooyi giggle loudly, it was so fake, it made you sick. He was such a genuine person, and she was nothing but a stuck up little-

“My night was wonderful! I went shopping for our date this weekend. I can’t wait for you to see the outfits I picked out!” You sank down onto the bench. Shit… You hadn’t told her… What would happen now?

“Sh-Shopping?” He questioned, and you wanted to crawl under a rock. You wanted to hide from her and the wrath that you knew was bound to be coming your way. “I thought you were studying? You said… You said you were at the library…”

She went silent, and even though you were outside, you could feel the tension in the air. “Did… Did I say shopping?! Oh my gosh, I meant studying! I’m a big nerd! You know me!” She laughed again, but this time there was something else… Nervousness? Irritation? Anger? She’d be looking for you.

“You’re acting weird… Are you okay?” He asked, and she scoffed loudly. Should you spare a glance and risk meeting eyes with her? “Were you just… Lying about studying? Was it to try to… Impress me? You know you don’t have to do that.”

“I know I don’t. I’m impressive enough!” She said loudly, it’s like she enjoyed making scenes. She was disgusting. “I have to go really quick, I forgot my big ol’ textbook back at my room. I’ll meet up with you later? We can have lunch!”

“Y-Yeah… Sure…” Something had changed… He wasn’t buying it anymore. But you didn’t have time to worry about that. Jooyi was looking for you, and you were tired of being scared of her. You were tired of worrying about what she’d do or what she’d say about you. Jisung liked you, even if just as a friend… You had been made clear of that last night at the library. She couldn’t even make it one day… The two of you were just too different, and he had noticed. You weren’t sure what would happen next, but you weren’t going to hide away, you weren’t going to give in. You deserved to be happy… You might not have the money, you don’t have the luxuries, but you have the willpower, and you have the drive… And that was worth way more than what her money could ever buy.

“I need to talk to you… Now.” As if like magic, she appeared in front of you. She was angry, no doubt, but there was nothing she could do to hurt you. So you got up, following her off to the side of one of the buildings, and before you could say anything the palm of her hand connected with your cheek. “You bitch! You said that you’d tell me when he messaged you! Was this your plan?! To humiliate me in front of him!”

Now it was your turn to scoff, your turn to laugh, and while the sting in your cheek hurt, it didn’t hurt as much as knowing that you almost let him get away, you almost let him get stuck with someone like her. “I didn’t have to plan it for it to work out like this. You humiliated yourself. He isn’t your type… Deal with it.”

“You…” She started, but it quickly turned to a scream, one filled with pure rage as she started grabbing at the pockets of your jacket. “Give me your phone! He doesn’t want you! He wants me! You’re nothing! You’re poor and you’re pathetic and you’ll never have him! Why would anyone want you!” She just… screamed… She screamed so loud, and with every attempt to grab at you, you swatted her hands away, backing up further and further until you bumped into something… or… someone. “Oh! Jisung!” She full stopped, adjusting her hair and putting on the fakest smile.

“What are you doing?” He asked, looking between you and Jooyi. “What are you talking about?” His eyes focused on you a lot longer, as if studying you, and you felt the heat of his gaze, but it didn’t burn, it just made you feel warm, it made you feel safe. “Why do you want her phone?”

Jooyi was stuttering over herself, unable to form a coherent sentence as her head shook violently. “She… Sh-She’s blackmailing me, Ji! She stole my username on Anonny… She’s pretending to be me so that she can get with you… So she can take you away from me!” She whined, and you couldn’t help but look disgustedly at her. She truly was the queen of scenes, stomping her feet and throwing a tantrum like a child would. How pathetic.

“My… tutor… Is blackmailing… You?” He questioned, and her eyes widened before turning her daggers towards you. “What’s your name on Anonny? If she stole it from you… What is it?” You didn’t have to do anything, he was putting all of the pieces together for himself. You weren’t sure what would happen once the puzzle finally came together… And maybe it wouldn’t work out for you… But to see her get knocked down to size, it made it all worth it.

“I-It… My Anonny name? You know it! You tell me what it is!” She said, and you knew why, she was trying to get him to say it… But he was smarter than that. He shook his head, letting out a disappointed chuckle, and then his attention was back on you. “Don’t! Don’t look at her! Look at me! You love me!”

“Do I?” He whispered, but he never looked away from you, his head tilted and a small smile on his face. “What’s your Anonny username?” He asked, and you felt the heat rising inside of you. This was your chance, your moment, you didn’t know where it would lead you to, but it was time.

“I’m… JustAnotherGirl… Just another girl that has a crush on you… That gets overlooked and forgotten. But I’m here… And I’ve been here for four months…” You murmured, and he let out a shaky gasp. Was he embarrassed? Was he ashamed that you were the girl he had been talking to for so long? “I’m sorry. I’m not popular, I’m not even close to rich. I don’t have much to give… But-”

“But you’re perfect…” He stepped closer to you, causing you to stumble back as your breath hitched in your throat. “You’re smart, and you’re sweet… You’re kind and you’re genuine. You’re not materialistic, you’re just… You’re wonderful, you’re wonderfully you…” His hand reached up, his knuckles brushing lightly against your cheek. “You’re the girl that I fell in love with…”

“WHAT!!?” Jooyi screeched from behind you, and before you knew it, you and Jisung were being pushed apart. “Are you serious right now?! Her?! She’s… She’s a roach! She’s vermin! I can’t believe you right now! Have you seen me?!”

“Sadly.” Jisung retorted, and it took everything in you not to laugh, but everyone that had gathered around to see what was going on laughed enough for you. “I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t talk about my girlfriend like that.”

“G-Girlfriend?!” Jooyi scoffed, running her hands through her hair. “You’ve got to be kidding me! Just… When you lose all your friends because you’re with a loser, don’t come crawling back to me! Have fun being not popular!”

“I think it’s time for us to go, don’t you?” He asked, completely ignoring her now as he draped his arm over your shoulder. “You want lunch? Anything you want, it’s on me.”

///

HanJi : I’ll be at the library soon. I’ve got hot cocoa!

Beautiful Wonderful Girlfriend : Don’t drive too fast, the snow is really coming down now…

“I know it is…” His voice came from behind you, and then the cups of hot cocoa were placed in front of you on the table. “It’s really pretty, isn’t it?” You glanced out the window, awestruck at just how beautiful campus could look when blanketed in dazzling white snow. “You brought your coat, right?”

You nodded your head, patting the chair beside you where the coat that he had given you almost 2 years ago was neatly hanging over the back of the seat. “It’s your coat… You just won’t let me give it back.” You teased, and he let out a soft sigh as he dropped down into his seat. He hadn’t changed a bit since the first time you both sat at this table together.

It was strange how time worked, it felt like forever ago, but you remembered it like it had happened just yesterday. “It’s our coat, babe. What’s mine is yours.” He sounded so serious, but you couldn’t help but laugh at the statement. He was talking like the two of you were… Married? Your laughter subsided as you stared at him across the table, your lips parted slightly as you let out a quiet breath.

“You’re funny…” You said sheepishly, turning your attention back out the window, focusing on the snowflakes that danced down from the sky, finding the perfect place to rest. “We’re not married, our things don’t have to be shared…” Even though you both had been together for two years and he was the sweetest, most loving boyfriend you had ever had… You still couldn’t get those words out of your head. The words from the past that had been uttered by the girl that had wanted to take your place… He would never want to be with someone like you…

“Yet…” He murmured, the word like a breath leaving his lips. You blinked a few times, feeling the heat rising in your cheeks, your heart thumping loudly in your chest. Did he really love you that much? Could someone really love you that much? Were you deserving of this much love, to be with someone like him? “What are you thinking about, babe?” He cooed, reaching across the table to grab your hands that were folded on top, his thumb brushing lightly across your knuckles.

“I’m just…” You began, feeling the familiar sting of fresh tears beginning to brim in your eyes, but it was slightly different this time… They weren’t tears of sadness or fear… You were happy. “I’m so lucky… And… I never thought I’d be with someone so amazing… So perfect…” You could barely get your voice above a whisper, your throat closing up from trying to hold back your tears.

“Mm…” He hummed, pushing away from the table and getting up, walking around to your side of the table and grabbing your hand. “Let’s take a walk… yeah?” One more glance out the window and you saw the snow creating almost a wall of white as it came down harder, but there was no wind, it was just… beautiful. “I’ll keep you warm, don’t worry.”

You nodded your head, grabbing the coat and slipping it on, the scent of his cologne, although faded, still brought you comfort when you put it on. “Where are we going?” You quizzed, slipping your fingers between his as you both walked out of the library. You were sure that nothing would be open, not with this weather.

“Anywhere… I just… I want to walk with you.” He said, his voice kind of shaky, like his nerves had gotten the better of him. He led you aimlessly through campus, and you followed right along beside him. You didn’t really care where you were going, as long as you were with him, you’d follow the path he was taking blindly with your hand in his. “I’ve been thinking a lot about how I’ll do it…”

Was he talking to you or was he just thinking out loud? You looked to him, the snowflakes catching on your eyelashes as you tried to read him, but he was looking straight forward, his lips turned up into a lopsided smile. “How you’ll do what?” Even though you were speaking softly, the silence that surrounded you made every word sound so loud.

“Propose.” He sounded so calm, but the singular word alone had you pausing, pulling him back so he would face you. “What? Can I not think about how I’m going to propose to my wonderful, beautiful, amazing, sweet, lovely-“

“Okay okay!” Even after 2 years, you still weren’t the best at taking compliments, especially when he was looking at you so intently. “Why are you thinking about that right now? We’re still in college and… I want you to focus on graduating. So we can both be successful. You know?”

His hand slipped out of yours and then his arm snaked around your waist as he started walking again, pulling you along with him. “I can focus on graduating, and I can focus on you. I’ve been doing it since the day I truly met you… the real you.” He chuckled quietly, the sound building in his chest as his head shook. It was funny now, to look back on everything that happened. “And I like thinking about the future, it makes me happy to know that I’ll be spending it with you. But you don’t have to worry about me proposing in college… I wouldn’t want everyone to see. I want it to be a moment for us to remember.” You hummed softly, leaning against his shoulder as you simply listened to him, you let him get lost in his thoughts because you didn’t mind getting lost in them either. They had you looking forward to a better, simpler time where the two of you would be able to be together without worrying about grades and finals. “Flower petals will line the path that I’ll take you down…” He murmured, and your eyes were focused on his face, not noticing the trail of pink and red in the snow. “A gazebo, with fairy lights twinkling brightly, shining in your eyes…” He continued, sighing softly. “Nobody is around, the snow is falling, you look absolutely stunning against the backdrop…”

“A winter proposal?” You asked, and you were so lost in his thoughts and your own that you hadn’t even noticed how far you had walked until he was leading you up the stairs of a white wooden gazebo, perfect icicles hanging off the roof of it, and… fairy lights illuminated the inside. “Ji…” You whispered his name, a tuft of smoke coming from your mouth as you breathed it out. His arm left your waist and he kneeled down in front of you, his cheeks a dark pink from both the cold and his nerves. “You said… You said you wouldn’t propose when we were still in college…”

He snickered, fishing a black velvet box out of his pocket, his snow dampened hair curtaining his eyes as he kept his head down. “I meant… not while we were in the college. We’re not on the grounds anymore…” He finally looked up at you, and you let out a shaky gasp as it truly set in what he was doing. “I don’t want to wait any longer, I know that you’re the one that I want to spend all of my life with. I’ve never felt more comfortable with anyone else. I love you, I’ve known that I loved you since before I even… before I even knew you. I wake up every morning and thank everything that you’re mine, and I fall asleep every night knowing that no matter what, everything will be okay because I have you by my side. I don’t care what anyone thinks, I don’t care what people might say… I only care that you’re happy… And if you say yes, I promise… To do my best to make you feel happy and loved every single day until the day that I die.” He opened the box, and the diamond facets of the silver ring glistened and reflected the lights that had been strung up. “So… Will you… Will you marry me?”

You choked out a sob, dropping to your knees in front of him as you nodded your head yes, and he quickly pulled the ring out of the box, his hand shaking as he slid it onto your finger. “Ji…” Was all you could say as you looked at the ring, cold, yet so beautiful in its place. His chilled hands cupped your cheeks, tilting your head so that your eyes would meet his. “I love you…”

“And I’ll always love you.” He leaned in, kissing you softly and humming against your lips. “Shall we go back inside and warm up, my beautiful, lovely, wonderful, amazing-“

“Stop~” You playfully whined, giggling quietly as you dropped your gaze once more. “You’re so cheesy…” You mumbled, and then you felt his lips against your forehead, his fingers brushing your hair out of your face.

“And you’re… You’re everything to me…” He pushed himself up to his feet, carefully pulling you up and then hugging you tightly. “Thank you, for making me happy, for loving me… I can’t wait to marry you."

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koolades-world · 3 months

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I was just wondering if you could write for the demon brothers (and undateables if you want) to MC coming back after leaving Devildom for a year (or any long period of time), and they are unrecognizable to the brothers (and/or undateables). Like they had a glow up and came back looking different to where they are unrecognizable <33

I love reading your work it makes my day. Everyday after work I come home and read your posts, really lightens my mood 🫶🏼

hi!! of course!

I'm so happy to hear that you like my work!!! makes all my writing worth it, hope you enjoy this one especially!

Mc who had a glow up!

Lucifer

looks a little surprised at first

however, he continues as if everything was normal

later, he lets you know he likes your new look subtly

never directly addresses it, but you notices his eyes linger on you until he notices you're looking at him

Mammon

tries to pretend like nothing has changed but you can see the gears turning in his head

it's funny to watch him struggle to be cool about it

if you mention it, he freezes and begin to protest as he begins to turn bright red

once he snaps out of it, he begins trying to walk away but probably runs into a wall

Levi

not even trying to hide how shocked he is

unusually confident and he lets you know he likes your new look

he admits for a second, he didn't recognize you

however, he's just happy to have his Henry back and asks when you have time to play games with him in person, instead of online

Satan

pretends like he doesn't know you at first to mess with you

"and who's this gorgeous human standing in the living room?" "SATAN"

you're still the same Mc under the new look, so he's relieved to finally have some one around who actually took the time to try and understand him

takes you out to one of his big gatherings to keep you all to himself and make everyone jelous

Asmo

immediately asks every questions that pops into his head, such as your new skin care routine and if he can do it too

if you haven't done much, he's convinced you're hiding some life changing secret from him but lets it go

posts about your return on Devilgram which causes you to get a new surge of followers

expect a shopping spree and a fun photoshoot afterwards

Beel

for a second, he actually didn't recognize you

but, as soon as he felt the pact flare up, he was happy to be reunited

another brother who doesn't really care since you're the same to him

wants to celebrate with a dinner, just like last time you were in the Devildom

Belphie

teases you a little about small things

however, lets you know he actually likes the way you look now

as long as you can still nap together, he's happy

expect lots of kisses, not because he likes the new you better, btu because he's happy to have you back

#obey me #obey me!#obey me satan #obey me x reader #obey me asmo #obey me beel #obey me levi #obey me lucifer #obey me belphie #obey me mammon #omswd #obey me shall we date #obey me mc

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simplydnp · 1 month

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WAD: Cover Art

dan is still working on selling the distribution rights for We're All Doomed! so i decided to make some DVD/Blu-ray disc jacket art!

this is my attempt at a traditional jacket design! none of the images used are mine, but i did create the concept and design:

as i was making the first one for myself, i was struck by the fact that 'well, it's for me, so it doesn't have to look like a stereotypical jacket cover' which led me to be more artsy in my approach for the next one:

i was really enjoying the creativity and space to explore, so i went looking for more inspiration for a third design. this led me to dan's favourite Muse album: Origin of Symmetry, which i paid homage to:

after the first Muse album, i looked at their catalogue to see if there was more inspiration there. i was just thankful dan's favourite was easy stylistically to mimic, unlike say, 2009's The Resistance...

thank you @danielhowell for the inspiration!

nerdy stuff & reference pics below the cut!

General notes

i don't know how to use photoshop! i entirely brute-forced my way through the whole project, and the only tutorial i looked up was for the gradient text in the 4th cover

this wasn't even the original project i was working on! you'll eventually get to see that though

and this one also inspired art for the disc itself so stay tuned 👀

i will do anything for authenticity so these are Full of intentional details

matching fonts is a nightmare

the traditional cover

took the longest, as it was the first.

the barcode numbers are the date of the first video he uploaded on dinof, and the last tour show date (in m/d/y)

i changed 'iceland' to 'poland' on the front cover, as he never actually went to iceland, and poland wasn't ever on the list even though he did go there

the orange may look a little off-center in the front, but these designs need to include space for a spine between the front and back cover, i promise it's right 😂

the black and white cover

inspired by the 'i want to believe' aliens poster

the cover art comes from his metal band merch shirt design

i had to manually shrink the text, line by line, and ensure it all lined up on the back!

i even made the logos on the back greyscale

the Muse: Origin of Symmetry cover

a shockingly perfect style for a WAD cover. i'm so glad i used the cubes, even if they couldn't be orange.

there's some versions of the art online where the sky is even more orange and it baffles me how i haven't seen any parallels like this before

the Muse: The Resistance cover

this cover was never supposed to see the light of day! i meant it when i said i was grateful i didn't have to try to adapt this complex design... and yet, i tried anyway.

i did all the grid lines by hand, including the jagged/broken edge parts, shading each section, and then drawing every star.

the hardest part was getting the gradient on the back text to cooperate. photoshop's gradient settings are surprisingly limited

gotta shout out @amazingphil for being the reason i knew what this cover looked like--it's the only muse album i knew the art of before embarking on this quest!

obligatory sob story:

i've been extremely and suddenly ill for 6 months. it is difficult to function moment to moment, but especially in doing little things just for me. this is the first and only art project i've been able to feel inspired to not only work on, but to finish, and despite the pain and long hours, i enjoyed every minute of it. thank you, dan, for creating this space for me to explore, and thank you, everyone here, for being wonderful support during this time 💞

#it's finally here!! i hope you all love them as much as i do #dnp #c.text #dan and phil #daniel howell #phan art #hey phil look at this #we're all doomed #wad #c.art #word

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shallyouobeyme · 7 months

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For the “spicy” prompt im imagining Platonic Yandere Batfam discovering your internet history, and having a confrontation about how you’re far too young for such things (reader is a full adult, not that the Batfam sees it that way).

I sadly already have something written out for today, but I really love this idea so I decided that I'd just go into the concept a bit as well - I mean I make the rules to this so I might as well use that power.

Okay, so I don't really write smut as of now because I don't read it and I do have not a lot of real-life experience so I figure it might just be a lot of cringy blabbering. But let's go with the 'spicey' meaning that horny adolescents will probably think of when reading the word in the context of fanfiction.

Now you're probably somewhere in the span of 16-20 in this scenario, old enough to live independently on your own, but young enough that the batfam can somehow justify it in their mind to treat you like a precious, fragile, little toddler. Sure, some of them logically know that you're basically a grown-up, but with how much effed-up shit they see every day they don't really wanna admit that to themselves and rather chose to act all 'I do not see'. And while that's all fine and dandy for them to do, it doesn't change the logical facts. Fact number one: You grew out of binkies and blankies like a decade ago, for god's sake Dick stop trying to make me take ten naps a day with them. Fact number two: Like I said, you're kind of (definitely) an adult and assuming that you have not always been the coddled little Wayne-baby that the Batfam wants to see you as you've probably been exposed to adult things before and aren't sensitive with seeing them. Like, guys, I was reading the news daily before you crazy people kidnapped me - stop talking about international crises as if the countries are people who have minor disagreements, okay? Fact number three: there comes a time in an adult's life when they might be craving a somewhat more intimate partner in their life - and no, Damian, I don't mean the bestest friend in the whole world forever, I mean a guy or a gal or a nonbinary pal who can rock your shit, if you get my drift (never dare say that to Damian out loud tho, you will be having your mouth washed out with soap). So while it might be a giant oversight on your part to not realize that all your precious internet time is completely monitored, you still probably haven't expected to be sat down by Bruce, Dick, Jason and Alfred and get a lecture on how you're way too little to look up these kinds of things (you looked up TikTok videos and happened to watch a few with TikTokers dancing in slightly less covered clothing) and how your mind is too undeveloped to grasp these big things you searched for (you looked up a statistic on the rate of kidnapping victims to get killed) and how you should keep playing your safe games instead of these violent ones (you looked at a game trailer for Cyberpunk 2077).

All your arguing falls on deaf ears. They just don't wanna hear that you're not their little, innocent baby. The only good thing is that they don't think you have enough logical thinking skills yet to properly grasp the situation so you'll be punished very lightly (a month without internet privileges). Once you're allowed to go online again though, you'll have to make do with the special kiddy-pad they got you with all the safety features and parental controls installed. So yeah, might wanna get used to being without the internet from now on...

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greenxgloss · 1 month

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Friends For Now? (Charlie Walker)

NSFW

summary: you and charlie have been friends for some time and he would help you do your homework sometimes, this time he caught you at the perfect time, struggling to finish your psych homework that happened to be about his favorite movies. while he was helping you he went in for a kiss and you allowed it to escalate.

warnings: unprotected sex, implications of stalking, mentions of female masturbation, fem!reader, use of Y/N, soft!dom!charlie, p in v, fingering, implied overstimulation

It's Tuesday night and your assignment is due tomorrow but you just can't get yourself to sit and focus on the Stab movies for this psych homework. "Watch Stab 2 and write a summary of the movie and a synopsis of the killers." you read aloud, hoping that it would help your answer click in your head. you scoffed and shoved your books over. for some reason you just couldn't focus on the movies and even after trying to cheat online you got nothing.

You heard a tap on the window and it was Charlie your best friend. "hey! need help?" he asked, opening the window. you quickly stood up and put on a shirt before he got in. "relax dude nothing I haven't seen before." he said, taking a deep breath as he gathered himself at the window. you giggled and sat back on your bed. "here just copy mine and change the wording around. the usual." he said throwing his notebook in front of you and zipping his bag back up. "thanks. I've been stumped for days." you told him as he joined you on the bed. "why didn't you just call me?" he asked. "ahh I don't know I just wanted to do this on my own. i always ask you for help." you told him as you copied down the answers. "no shame in asking for help." he said sheepishly, almost blushing.

sometimes you'd wonder if he'd ever watched you from your window. you knew that would be a crazy thing to accuse your friend of and also illegal but you didn't mind the idea. charlie is awfully pretty. he has big blue eyes but they weren't piercing, they were soft and laid gently on you every time. even before you both became friends and he would peer at you from across classrooms you didn't feel uncomfortable, you felt... admired, like he was watching in adoration. of course, it felt lustful but it also felt wholesome and full of love. still, you never pursued him that way. you felt as though you didn't have room for that kind of commitment in your life. you wanted to get your shit together first, to get the grades, the job and the money. then and only then would you have time to give someone your undivided. anyway you didn't mind his pretty eyes on you at night with your hand slipped under your lace, watching from the window as you pirspired and whined quietly to keep anyone in the house from hearing.

charlie snapped you out of it. "y/n?"

"uh.. i don't know it would just be nice to get it for myself." you told him as you continued writing. "I appreciate it don't get me wrong but its not like you're gonna be able to help with tests and exams." you giggled. he smiled. "no I know I just, want you to know Im here you know? you can always call." he said, moving over to sit next to you and shove your shoulder. you nodded and let the comfortable silent engulf you and you looked at each other in the same admiration you felt when you'd spot him watching you in class.

he looked down at his hand and back up at you as he slowly put it on your thigh waiting for your approval at which point you lightly put your hand on his and inched it up to your heat. "charlie." you started, "do you ever watch me from the window?" you asked him as your face heated up and you let him press his fingers to your clothed clit. he let out an exhale. "mhm." letting his eyebrows furrow as he thought about all the times he wanted to crawl through the window into your bed and make you cum and scream his name. "you watch me touch myself?" you whispered, a quiet whine following as he pressed firmly. "you knew I was. don't pretend you don't know I watched you arch and say my name and beg for me." he said, finally getting on top of you and kissing your neck. you'd been kissed but you'd never been touched this way and it made you ache for him. you had to bite your lip a little harder while his hands roamed you freely you felt your body cling to his. "fuck charlie." you moaned. "just like that." he smirked, grinding his hips between yours, feeling the tent pitch in his own jeans.

he inched your shorts off. "you're so beautiful baby." he said, scanning you over then kissing you, placing his hands on your tits and lightly groping you causing you to moan into his mouth. "you gotta stay quiet if you wanna keep going." he pulled away and whispered, keeping eye contact as he slipped in two fingers causing your mouth to gape. "you're so good to me charlie fuck it feels so good." you continued to whine and melt into his gentle touch. "yeah? tell me how good it feels baby." he hummed watching you squirm and buck your hips at his fingers, desperately wanting him to reach deeper. "I need you so bad. I want you to fuck me." you told him and felt him curl his fingers up making you grip his arms and moan into his mouth. you wanted to touch him so you reached for his jeans and he let you unbutton them. his cock popped out hitting him on the stomach and you quietly gasped. "holy shit Charlie it's so big." you watched the length just keep going. you took his shirt off as he pulled his fingers out of your throbbing cunt causing you to gasp softly.

you sat back and watched him. you deeply thought he was beautiful. "you're so sexy charlie." you told him as you reached out and caressed his chest then pushed him down and got on top of him. you tossed your shirt off as you straddled him. "speak for yourself." he dragged his hands from your waist to your ass as you adjusted yourself and slowly slipped his length into your tight wet pussy, one hand on his chest and the other wrapped around his cock. "oh fuck fuck fuck" you moaned and you began bouncing but of course, charlie couldn't hold his patience and began rocking his hips up into you both of you now quietly whimpering and whining in sync.

the room was sweaty and the light was dim as your moans filled the walls along with the sound of your skin smacking each others. the sound only made you more and more wet. soon you felt your core untangle and you slowly reached your climax. "fuck I'm cumming I'm cumming." you almost yelled and he quickly covered your mouth as his thrusts became sloppy. charlie fell apart at the same pace as you did, both of you finishing in sync. a rare occurrence for him who has had sex before.

you fought to catch your breath as you fell beside him, your shoulders touching. "that was..." Charlie trailed out. "my first time." you interrupted causing him to jump up. "YOUR FIRST TIME?" he whisper yelled, looking right into your eyes with pure lust. you could swear his pupils were hearts. "yeah? isn't it obvious?" you said, furrowing your eyebrows. "absolutely. I've never finished at the same time as the other person.. that might have been the best sex I've ever had.." he said, laying back down and holding you to his chest. you giggled quietly as you snuggled into him. "I mean not that I have anyone to compare it to other than my own hands but you did amazing." you whispered as you turned over to let him spoon you. "oh no we aren't done." he said, whipping up and throwing your legs apart, startling you.

needless to say, the two of you went on and on for hours and you had no complaints when you were falling asleep in psych class next to him while he laughed at you.

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snapscube · 3 months

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you don't have to publish this or whatever but I wanted to say, I'm right there with u on Projects That I Put On A Schedule And Then Couldn't Stick To That Schedule. it kinda sucks (especially, I imagine, if you have an audience asking about the things; being unknown has its pros and cons) but at the end of the day imo trying is the important thing and doing it infrequently is better than not at all. keep doing you and put out what you can and want, when you can and want, and people will enjoy it regardless of frequency or scheduling or whatever

hey i appreciate this a ton <3 admittedly i was very grumpy over the assumption that just because no shame was intended w/ asking me like that about projects i haven't updated in a while that it would mean no shame was caused LOL. it's actually, in a cruel twist of irony, something i have very specifically been insecure about over the past couple of days and i already wasn't having the best morning in general. whoops!

i think a lot of people assume by default i am a much more put-together person than i actually am just because i have some semblance of success haha. truth be told everything that i am able to put out is a god damn miracle in the sense that i am constantly fighting to do so against rampant fatigue and depression. i always always want to do more, and i have every intention to do so. i always assume i can if i just try hard enough since it seems easy enough for other folks, which is why i sometimes over-promise. but i'm still really trying to make things fit every day, and lately i have admittedly not had a lot of success. i have not given up yet tho! i think 2024 is gonna prove to be a year where i have to call on a bit of a hail mary approach because i KNOW there's a better way than what i've been doing. whether that's through a massive output change in terms of schedule, or whether that's a huge break, or whether it's sunsetting certain parts of my online output in the interest of focusing on things i'd rather be using that limited stamina for. feels like SOMETHING's gonna have to give.

anyway, i hope to never come across like i'm taking peoples patience for granted. it always legitimately sucks when people earnestly want to see something return, and i do too, but i have no better answer to where it is aside from just "i couldn't do it"

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choochooboss · 1 year

Text

Submas sketchdump! Vol. 1

April-June 2022

Literally dumping all the presentable works as promised, whether I'm proud of them or not! This is where I started, even before the first thing I posted online (That subway station one). Many of these are not on Twitter yet so there's lots to see!

The top piece above the header is my very first digital Submas artwork!! I never finished it bc I didn't know how to pull my vision of as I wanted & started modeling the train and didn't finish that either, whoops! I really want to remake this later and make it super cool!

^^^ My reaction to breaking 500 likes & 100 followers in a single day with my first tweet (the battle subway one) all the way back in May!! I was completely floored by all the attention, oh how it skyrocketed my excitement and anxiety! Crazy times, I was so super nervous to be there with so many amazing artists and doubted if I could ever survive there ahahah!! Many had joined the community much much earlier than me, so I had arrived with a late train to PLA/neo Submas hype!

Next up is a bunch of stuff I haven't posted before:

One of my fav sketches! Been saving this for so long bc I really really want to finish this one day!

One of the first submas sketches with an actual story behind it! The subway bosses are running late for their flight because they didn't pass the safety check! The irony!! This would never happen as bosses are always on schedule. But Emmet hadn't noticed a wild Joltik hiding under his coat, so he set up the alarm and they got examined and interrogated of smuggling! How embarrassing for them! The bosses resolved the situation by catching the Joltik, but will they be able to catch their flight anymore?? Maybe if Elesa can distract the stuerts performing the safety protocol for a minute!

More sketchbook stuff...

In case you can't make any sense of it, Emmet's dreaming of different combinations of pokémon. Meanwhile Ingo snores louder than the train! HONK SHOO!

Top 7 every submas fan draws at some point!

Submas trademark posing

submas sleeping in a train

sad Emmet

Emmet with Joltik

Ingo with a cool solo pose

Emmet being chaotic & Ingo reacting to it

a bunch of mirrored submas poses

I sure have a full bingo card lmao, most of them you can see here XD

Next up is a sad man...

Stay strong our friends!

My typical sketchbook pages, crammed and messy as usual. x)

Post-PLA exploration:

A few examples of how my pencil sketches evolve.

I've done so much art experimenting with submas. I really like this black & white painting but I don't think I'll finish it anytime soon.

Where did you go?

The way I draw the twins' faces has changed a lot. They started with softer features and somewhat neutral emotions, because I wasn't as familiar with them or comfortable drawing them yet. Now there's hundreds of submas sketches, and they still keep evolving! My style is also kinda hard to pull off well, so their features differ from picture to picture.

This one was inspired by some submas music videos, can't recall their names anymore. The glowing eerie eyes and yellow&orange + black&white color schemes were neat!

I keep telling myself I need to draw more butlers, these twinks look so lean and neat and have more color and are posh with their monocles and have fun tailcoats!

(...why eyeglasses are not called binocles??)

I was there for the vinegar chaos. Good times!

That's all for now, I hope you got something fun out of this! Still got loads more art to share but I'll save them for another time. Next round I'll bring in my first submas comic!

#submas #sbms #submas ingo #submas emmet #pokemon ingo #pokemon emmet #subway boss ingo #subway boss emmet #ingo and emmet #sketch dump #chandelure #archeops #sinistea #submas butlers #butler ingo #butler emmet #too many ideas #butlermas

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itskattkm · 4 months

Text

The air in my lungs

Chapter 6

Cairo Sweet x Fem Reader

Summary: A stroke of fate changes you and leads you into the arms of Cairo Sweet. Will she be your downfall or save you?

Warnings: 18+, Grief, Injuries, Smoking, Trauma, anxiety, sexual content, student x teacher mentioned, harm, blackmailing, bad grammar

Masterlist | previous chapter | Next chapter

You were lying on your stomach, with the arms under your pillow, breathing quite and steady when Cairo began to caress the scars on your back gently. You could feel her fingertips moving carefully above the higher parts of the scars. It’s been almost a month now. They were healed but still, somehow fresh. They were pretty pink and it would take some time before they would turn lighter and become a bit smoother.

Cairo was resting her upper body on one arm while watching your back. Scanning every scar, trying to figure out how the accident happened. She couldn’t stop thinking about the details, what you must have been feeling like when it happened and what it was like for you after the crash.

Her long, now wavy hair was falling slightly into your face, you didn’t cared, you had your eyes closed anyways while relaxing right beside her in bed. You could still hear the rain outside, the thunder had stoped some time ago. Cairo was wearing one of your shirts you had offered her so she wouldn’t be freezing cause the thunderstorm had really cooled down the heat in your town. Suddenly you felt something soft and wet on one of your scars across the shoulder blade. You released some air satisfied and had immediately goosebumps all over your body the moment you noticed that Cairo just kissed one of your scars and kept caressing them in general.

You loved this. And you could have stayed like this for the rest of the day or maybe forever. You never liked being close to someone, you never thought you would be in a situation like this. The scars in your back weren’t a thing you were ashamed of. You didn’t cared about something like that after barely dying. They weren’t pretty, that was a fact. But still… you were okay. And Cairos touch was so soft… it made you almost fall back asleep.

“I was a bit sad or well… confused that one day when your were acting so mean in swimming class…” began Cairo to speak so quite that alone her voice made you feel another wave of goosebumps. “so Winnie and I tried to find out why”.

You weren’t surprised to hear this, almost everyone in school wanted to know what happened to you, mostly because you had changed your way of styling and your personality mostly. But you were surprised that Cairo cared enough to really find out why you acted so different towards her that day, that made you smile into your arm, wich Cairo couldn’t see.

“…I’m so sorry y/n” she whispered and then moved to snuggle up her body onto yours. Her hand still on your back while her head was now beside yours on the pillow.

So Cairo knew about the accident and about the loss of your mother. She knew.

You looked at Cairo as if she read your deepest, darkest secrets. You felt so surprised that Cairo knew something as personal about you. You always thought of Cairo as someone who you didn't need to talk about personal stuff with, but it seems as if you were completely wrong in this moment. "Cairo... how did you know about that?" You asked, your face completely surprised right now.

Cairos eyes wandered along your face while caressing your shoulder now since she had pulled her arm around it in some way. “Winnie was walking around the whole school and asked probably anyone she could find. Later we found some old news articles about the accident online”. Your face now had a look of disappointment on her face mixed with some sadness. "I... I haven't told anyone about this... and yet you and Winnie have known this whole time." You said softly. You felt suddenly embarrassed and angry over the fact that this was already known. Only your friends and some teacher knew about this. You didn’t wanted the whole school to know about this. "I'm so..." you stopped talking at this moment but Cairo already knew what she wanted to say right now.

“Your friends knew y/n and we managed to find them and asked what happened to you.

I saw your scars after swimming and I was so worried and didn’t understood why you panicked in the water but now I do… please don’t be mad” said Cairo and had such a worrying and soft look in her dark eyes that you immediately got quite and looked away.

You couldn't help it. You couldn't even look Cairo in the eyes anymore after having one of your most private and personal things being known for a long time now. You felt angry with Winnie and with Cairo now. But did you have the right to be angry now? You felt so overwhelmed by this that you weren’t sure how to feel about this. Keeping things private was important for you… and now two more people or even more knew about it. "I... I don't like to talk about that Cairo... please." You said and tried to stay friendly while your voice was slowly growing more and more quiet. You were trying so hard not to get mad at Cairo now, but it was so hard for you in this moment to not feel like this.

Why did it even bother you? So what, a few more people knew about it now. But still you felt suddenly so much anger inside you that you didn’t knew how to let it free. At this point you were clenching your teeth so hard, you felt your jaw getting numb.

You sighed and then turned around so your face would be facing Cairo. You needed some distance now. Cairo moved herself as close to you as physically possible right now while seeing you turn you back towards her completely. Cairo's eyes were filled with concern right now as she was suddenly so scared that you would never talk to her again now. "Y/n... don't push me away now..." Cairo whispered quietly right now with her eyes moving along her body to read her current state.

“It’s just-“ you tried to keep your breathing calm, closing your eyes so you wouldn’t feel overwhelmed by the memories. Your heart racing fast feeling your eyes getting teary.

“It’s hard to talk about it…” you whispered and tried to not make your voice break mid talking. Cairo couldn't hold back anymore she hugged you even tighter now. You could feel her body against your back, while her arms were wrapped tight around you. "Y/n... I'm so sorry right now... I can only imagine how hard this has must been for you and I... I know that it must be hard for you... but... I... I didn't know how hard it really was for you y/n. I'm so sorry." Cairo said when she buried her face in the back of your neck while she spoke. You turned around and hid your face immediately in her neck while wrapping your arms around her. Holding onto her.

Cairo was so happy in that moment, having you still by her side. She hugged you back tightly while not letting go of you until you would decided to let go. "I should have asked yourself instead of making research... I know that I messed up, I’m sorry y/n." Cairo whispered softly to you. “Don’t be… you were just curious I guess. I probably would have been too” you whispered and raised your head to take a deep breath and let it all out. Cairo wrapped her leg around you to keep you in place while her head rested under your chin. She felt a lot better after hearing the words come out of your mouth now. She felt so much happier and relieved. "You're right y/n... I was just curious and a bit worried that's all. I didn't mean to..." Cairo said while her voice grew calmer again. She was so glad that you weren’t mad at her right now. She felt such peace of mind in this moment with you in her arms. "Is... Is there anything I can do to make up for it? To win your trust maybe?" Cairo asked in a luring whisper tone.

You moved slightly so you could look into her eyes before you said barely audible “just stay…”. There was a short silence before you kissed her slow and gentle. Cairo's whole body felt so warm right now as she felt your lips touch her own. It felt so special, so beautiful right now. She kissed you back after your kiss, wanting to stay in this moment forever and ever. She wanted to feel your lips against her own again and again. "I'm yours y/n... I'm... I'm yours." Cairo whispered right, her voice growing softer with every word she spoke.

It was darker outside since the stone grey clouds were still on the sky. It may had stopped raining for now but Cairo was sure it would be raining for the next three days since the heat wave had been there for weeks. „Thank you for driving me home“ Cairo said with a loving smile before leaning over and giving you gentle kiss on the lips. You felt goosebumps creeping up your neck

As her lips met yours and left a feeling you were getting addicted to on you.

“No problem…” you whispered quite when their lips separated, you could feel your lips being slightly wet, the tingling getting intense. “If you want you can come in…” Cairo said quite and watched your reaction. Her parents should have been at their flight by now. It was a wonder they were even there this morning. You smiled and felt a slight blush on your cheeks while looking past Cairo. “Maybe next time, seems like someone’s waiting for you”.

Cairo looked confused at you and then followed your gaze to see Winnie standing in front of your gate raising her hands like “for real girl?”. Her eyes were wide and Cairo couldn’t hide her grin when she looked back at you. “I’ll see you tomorrow then… bye” she said with excitement and kissed you one more time before getting out of your car and walking towards the gate where Winnie was waiting.

“Okay you skipped tho whole day with y/n?! did you at least get laid?!” She asked excited and hit slightly Cairos shoulder. Seeing that bug grin in Cairos lips made Winnie even more excited and restless.

"Yeah... I got laid Winnie..." Cairo smiled widely as she spoke and used the vocabulary Winnie always tend to use.. She wasn't lying and she felt like finally having a connected with you in every way. She could feel every part of you and now she was sure that she truly wanted you with her whole heart. Cairo didn't even care about your scars or anything else that would considered you as "unattractive" by many others. You were her goddess in every way possible."I loved every single part of her Winnie... and... and..."

Cairo struggled to open the door to the mansion. Smiling wide, almost blushing. Winnie grinned wide and said curious “and?”

"I think I love her Winnie... and I... I wanna be with her forever. I know it's crazy right now Winnie, but... but it's true... I know I've never had the experience of sex... but..." Cairo took a deep breath and tried to calm down while speaking to Winnie. She then managed to put the right key into the lock of the door and stopped, looking at Winnie serious "Winnie... you're kind of my best friend... And you're gonna be the one that sees me get married to y/n if this ever happens... I'll never forget what you did for me Winnie." Cairo said as her voice grew softer and softer.

Winnie looked at Cairo with raised brows and fought hard to not laugh. “Listen babe, I think your body really needed some good sex because no one talks like this after having it once” Cairo rolled her eyes and opened the door. Winnie laughed and nudged her before putting her arm around Cairos shoulders. “I mean… love? Are you sure? I think you’re still in the haze of being so intimate with y/n fucking y/l/n”. Cairo shrugged her shoulders.

“You know. All this teasing and being flirty was really putting some sexual tension between us. The was that constant hunger and lust I felt but then… it changed into something way more intimate. I can’t explain… but I know that I feel good with her” Cairo said deep in thoughts, walking up the stairs in the big hallway. Winnie chuckled “I thought it was only about the sex, I guess that girl really did something to you”.

"I know we're both so young right now Winnie and I know that this sounds crazy right now... but... but it's true. I think y/n and I are gonna be something special together. I mean that's what I felt when I was with her Winnie. I felt like I could be completely vulnerable with y/n. She made me feel like I could tell her everything. I just wanna be with y/n forever Winnie, right now." Cairo said while putting her backpack down as soon as she entered her bedroom. “Well if so, then I’m happy to hear that but for real... How was it… your first time?” Winnie asked and then smiled cheeky at Cairo while lying down in her bed. “Was it as dirty as in your writings? Was it hot and rough or? Did she go easy on you before taking your virginity? Wait… were you on the top maybe?” Winnie’s grin got wider and wider with every question. Her heart beating fast, feeling excited to hear the answers.

"It was... It was wonderful Winnie. It really was. Everything... Just felt so right between y/n and I." Cairo said without giving any details, feeling suddenly so shy, not able to use any dirty words now, while smiling gently at Winnie now. She couldn't contain herself right now as she felt so good right now with y/n in her life. “Oh! And you know what?” Cairo said excited with a teasing tone while getting undressed, her clothes were still wet and she wanted to get changed. After putting on some shorts she turned around and gave Winnie a cheeky grin sayin “it was her first time too”.

The moment those words left Cairos mouth, she could see Winnie’s eyes falling out right of her skull. Mouth opened wide in shock. "really!? Y/n... y/n first time? You’re joking right?” Cairo kept grinning devilish and put on the rest of her clothes, she felt so happy and lucky in this moment right now.

“Wow… another proof that looking hot and all doesn’t mean your having sex 24/7” said Winnie speechless. She laid down on Cairos bed Looking for her lipgloss in her bag “we should celebrate this” she said. "I'd love to Winnie." Cairo said as she laid down beside her and looked at the ceiling. She felt so happy right now with you now, with y/n being her first and her also being your first now. "I think I finally understand why people fall in love for their whole lives now Winnie... I feel like y/n is the reason I'm gonna be in love for the rest of my life and... I don't think I'll see anyone as beautiful as y/n ever again." Cairo said.

Winnie could feel how excited Cairo was about this whole thing. Cairo felt completely in love with you right now. She felt that y/n was her everything. And she knew she had to protect y/n with her whole heart. "Cairo... I know this sounds crazy right now but... but keep it slow... you need to give such things time before saying your in love and stuff” said Winnie a bit serious now. Yeah Winnie was always joking a round with a slight truth behind it, she had a dirty mouth and mind as well. But she what Cairo was capable off and she wasn’t sure if Cairo was being honest or if this started to be a obsession. They both were friends, if they had to define what they were in one word. It may seemed as Winnie was the bolder and controlling one between the both of them. But the truth was that Winnie was fucking scared of Cairo. That girl seemed innocent but could be the devil in disguise. Winnie knew her limits and boundaries. She knew how Cairos personality could change within seconds if something should trigger her. So yeah. Winnie was indeed excited for her, but she was also scared of the things that would come with that.

“I know what I’m doing…” said Cairo in a quiet and calm way. But there was a tone hidden in it that made Winnie go quiet and feeling scared.

The next morning in school y/n attended later her class. She had another talk with the coach since the last argument. They talked without so what happened back then wouldn’t happen again.

After speaking out things with the coach, y/n made her way to her classroom. Slowly she opened the door without knocking. She didn’t wanted everyone to turn around and watch her sit down on her table. The moment Miss Perry saw you entering the room, you achieved a quiet mood from her. She was informed that you would be in a meeting with Coach Rey so she kept talking about the different perspectives on the book you were currently reading in class.

The moment Cairo saw the teacher nodding she knew you were there. She didn’t turned around to look into your y/e/c eyes. Instead she texted you via her laptop. "You're late today y/n." You were smirking, enjoying that she was thinking about you, enjoying the fact that it must have been bothering her that you wasn’t here till now. “Had a conversation with Coach Rey…” you answered her and looked at the back of her head, admiring her beauty. Cairo read the text sent you and instantly got curious about what you had to say, so much to the point where she decided to reply to you right after. "What did she say? Did you talk things out?" Cairo asked while texting you with a straight face not showing much expression like she used to before. “The last time I talked to her she didn’t seemed to care about my incident and the trauma I took with me from it, but after seeing what happened in our last swim session... let’s say I’m free from the classes for now. But she wants me to try… and swim at least one track once in the week after school. She would be there and check on me… other wise she would have to make me fail the class”

Fail. A word that caused anger inside of Cairo. She looked over and over again your message. Not realizing she had been clenching her teeth. Her heart beating harder. She inhaled deep before letting the air out of her lungs again. Fail. She repeater the word in her mind. No. Cairo indeed didn’t like the word and the things it was bringing with it. And the thought that you would be alone with the coach? Something bothered while thinking about this.

“I’ll make sure you won’t fail” she send you after a while. You smiled slight, feeling curious about it. Trying to understand what she could mean by that message. So you shrugged your shoulders slight and tried to get your attention to the class.

Cairo didn't even pay attention to what the teacher was saying anymore. She was just so caught up in the feeling your text made her feel. She turned her head to the side, looking over her shoulder to see you. Seeing your beauty, your strong side and also your vulnerable side, you were her everything now and she had to keep you. You looked down at your laptop and began to type. Cairo just continued to stare at you with an expression that was hard to read, but it was making you feel a bit intimidated.

A flick on Cairos screen made her stop staring at you. “You’re breaking your neck if you keep staring” she rode in her head and couldn’t help but smirk slightly, she could hear your teasing tone out of that message. Did she felt guilty for staring at you right now without even realizing it? Not at all. But was she slightly embarrassed? Yes she was. She felt so lucky that you didn't take it too seriously though so she laughed it off a little. "Sorry... I didn't mean it... I... I can't help it y/n... you're just..." Cairo texted.

“It’s okay… I mean you’re sitting in the first row. You can’t watch me like I watch you without getting caught” you answered in a slight flirty way. Cairo felt so happy in this moment right now. She felt confident with you, she felt like she could trust you with anything and everything and she just didn't want to keep anything hidden in the closet of her mind right now. "I think the teacher is gonna be mad if she sees you looking at them me... but I know I won't be mad at all if I see you looking at me y/n." Cairo texted with a big smile on her face.

“Yeah I just need to be careful, you make me drift away with my thoughts pretty badly. If the teacher wants an answer from me I probably wouldn’t hear her” you admitted, trying to flirt a bit. Cairo held a laugh back after hearing reading this and decided to make a joke about the situation they were in. "if you're so focused on me right now... and the teacher tries to ask for something from you... does that mean I'm more important right now y/n?" Cairo wrote as she turned back to face you again, smiling cheeky.

“Maybe” you whispered after reading her message when your eyes met hers. Cairo smiled wide and was fighting not to blush. She felt that you were just teasing her and she enjoyed it all. "Well y/n. If that's true... then... well… i have to admit that I rather be focused on you instead of this boring lesson." She message you while turning back around.

After that isn’t long till the bell rang, wich em at they had a short break before next class would start. Cairo was so excited right now. She couldn't even focus on anything else right now besides you. She was waiting for class to end the whole time so she could talk with you "Hey y/n... can i talk to you?" Cairo asked you when she approached your desk you were sitting on, feeling like she was about to confess her feelings right now. She just wanted to tell you how much she loved cared for you, without sayin I love you, Winnie was right. Saying those words, words that were powerful, words that were easy for some people and hard for others. She couldn’t say them yet. Deep down she believed it was indeed love but she wanted to wait, to make sure she wasn’t blinded by your affection. Besides that she wanted to know if you felt the same way right now and how things would keep going between the both of you.

“Sure… let’s get some coffee then” you said calm with a cute smile that made Cairo melt right away. Your smile looked so hot… she began sweating for a moment. You began to pack your stuff before getting up and making your way to the hallways with Cairo and getting some coffee in the canteen. After you both got your cups, you two made your way to the back of the school and sat down on the stair since it was mostly private there. Both were getting all the fresh air that still smelled like rain. Cairo felt so happy right now after spending some time with you alone and she knew that right now was the perfect time to tell you how much she liked you right now. You probably already sensed it but Cairo wanted to make things clear. She felt so nervous and she didn't know what to say and how to start talking to you now.

After the thunderstorm yesterday, today everything seemed to be covered in fog and mist. That’s why the most students stayed inside the building.

Cairo liked looking at the fog and mist outside of the school with you. Her eyes looked up at the sky while you both drank coffee. "Can I tell you how I feel about you right now y/n? And can I ask you something after that?" Cairo said calmly while looking at you, she felt so nervous but tried to not show any weak emotion. She didn't wanna make this something serious but she felt she had to be truthful now in order for them to move forward together.

“Sure you can…” you said quite a bit surprised. "I really like you. Like... a lot, I guess..." Cairo said as she looked up at you while talking and felt so nervous now. She had to calm herself now just to say it all right now. She couldn't wait any longer and she just wanted you to feel safe and know how about her intentions. "That's why... I..." Cairo paused here for a moment and tried to catch her breath.

“So you’re not only saying that because of yesterday?” You asked hesitant while looking down into the cup you were holding. Feeling also nervous now. Sure you both were flirting and teasing and one thing came to another but speaking so obvious about it? Oh that was hard and you couldn’t handle the stress you felt in your body, neither the emotions that were making you lose your mind.

Cairo looked down at the ground now and felt more nervous than before. Your question or accusation? made her second guess herself and even made her have the urge to not say anything to you at all. After a short silence she looked at you confident and serious while saying "No y/n... I didn't just say it because I had so much fun with you yesterday... I mean I really enjoyed what we had yesterday. And to me… it meant something. I don't regret sleeping with you... believe me when way I say it was more than just sex y/n...".

Her speech made you feel overwhelmed and scared. You never heard something like that. Being close to someone use to be hard for you. You didn’t like vulnerable but you had to admit, that what you and Cairo had yesterday. Was so intimate and closed. You were vulnerable, but also was she.

“You mean it?” You whispered almost not audible, looking at her in a way that showed her how vulnerable you were right now. You didn’t wanted to be mean by asking her that or accusing that she didn’t mean it. It was just… that you were t use to this, used to affection or even love. It was something you never had the chance to experience. Or even feel. So yes. It was hard for you to believe such words. But hearing them from Cairo, your heart wanted to believe it. Hoping it was true.

Cairo laughed a little here and couldn't stop herself because your question made her feel so giddy and happy right now. "Of course I meant every word y/n... the fact that I let you be that close to me is something that is not self-evident..." you nodded quite and got up. You threw your now empty cup into the trash and then leaned on the wall looking at Cairo, following your steps.

“Good…” you said so quiet and so calm that Cairo struggled to read you. “I’ll take you out then. How does Friday sound?” You said like it was nothing in the world. Cairo smirked slight, the way you tried to act chill about it just proved that you were nervous.

“Or do you consider Saturday? Cause you need to make homework and write?” You said a bit teasing with a hidden smile.

Cairo walked closer towards you with her mischievous smile “Friday. 6 pm. You pick me up” she said confident. You tilted your head and moved one step closer “what if 6pm is too late for the thing I have planned?” You said teasing, taking a bit of power away from her. Cairo rolled her eyes and was about to say something, but you pulling her by her shirt into your chest while you leaned in the wall again made her gasp.

“6pm is perfect” you whispered.

Your faces were so close, both of you having a slight grin in the lips. “Can I call you my girlfriend now or is this too soon?” You whispered and Cairos eyes began to shine, she had that sexy smile on her lips when she looked up to you and nodded “only if you keep calling me your dear” you smiled wide and stand upright, looking into her eyes while your noses brushed slight.

“Okay my dear…” you whispered and your hand slowly around her waist, holding her close. “But why isn’t my girlfriend kissing me yet?” You whispered in a playful flirtatious way. Cairo giggled as she was just pulled closer to you now. She felt your arm wrap around her while your hand rested on her back. She got pulled closer and it made Cairo feel so safe and happy. She laughed for a little bit here before getting a little serious again now. "Wait a second... Are you saying that you wanna kiss me y/n? I..." Cairo couldn't even finish what she wanted to say before she felt your body press up against hers and felt a kiss on the lips. It was a soft and gentle kiss but still. Cairo wanted more of you now.

"M-more... I... W-was waiting for this the whole morning..." Cairo said while looking at you now, trying to gain her composure again. She couldn't believe that she just said that to y/n but she felt so much pressure after feeling you kiss her. She wanted more of you right now and she couldn't help but feel a little needy and wanted to be held and kissed more by you. You were just so irresistible right now.

“After school?” You whispered while holding her close to you. Cairo nodded and her heart fluttered like crazy after this short moment you two shared. She felt like she was in a romance movie right now. And she didn’t liked those at all. “I was about to invite you anyways… you need a swimsuit or bikini when you come over” Cairo said and just kissed you on the cheek, her hand rubbed your back. "Why do I need swim clothes...?" You asked confused. Cairo softly rubbed your back, trying to gain her composure after that long kiss you just gave her right now. “No questions. Just make sure you’ll bring something you can get wet in” Cairo said with a mischievous grin and tried to tease you.

A loud whistle popped the bubble you two were in and your heads turned to the side to see Winnie. “Damn I get all worked up seeing you both” she said with a dirty grin and stopped beside the both of you. She looked at you with luring eyes saying with a lower voice “by the way I’m Winnie C-“

You nodded and looked at her serious “Cairos best friend. I know”. So that was your second or official first interaction with Winnie. Cairo held back her chuckle and grinned wide after hearing you cut off Winnie right now just to tell her that she knew who she was. "Hi" Cairo said as she turned fully to look at Winnie now, still a bit flustered by that long kiss. Your arm was still around Cairos waist, keeping her close to you, like you were protecting her or something. It made Cairo fell comfortable and indeed safe, she felt like she could be herself without any pressure. The fact that you cut off Winnie made her feel a bit giddy in a good way, she defiantly enjoyed this version of you. But she was curious. You seemed to not like Winnie at all, well… most people didn’t, cause she was the schools slut, if Cairo could explain it like that. Winnie said sometimes the most annoying and inappropriate things at the worst times. And Winnie was making out with every guy or girl in every spot you could find in the school. So yeah. Winnie wasn’t everyone’s favorite.

Winnie now looked a bit serious, seeming to understand that you weren’t her biggest fan. So why should she flirt then? Beside that… you were Cairos toy now. She sighed and said “as much as I enjoy that you’re fucking my best friend now-“ she then began to make a cross with her fingers. Moving them from her head to her chest and sliding them up from her left to the right shoulder. Making it seem like it was holy for her and important before keep talking “…but I still Wanne smoke with her”

Cairo turned to look at Winnie and she felt so much pressure from Winnie's comment right now. Winnie just interrupted the romantic and intimate moment between you and then pointed out the fact that you two had sex. She felt a bit ashamed even though Winnie was her friend. The whole situation made her feel so embarrassed that she didn't knew how to respond to Winnie's comment at all. “Depends if Cairo still wants to smoke” you said surprisingly soft and looked from Winnie towards Cairo.

Cairo knew that you were only saying that to Winnie, just to ease the moment. Cairo felt like she owed something to you after beautiful moment you two had before Winnie came. So she spoke, this time being extremely clear about what she wants. "I rather stay with y/n now. We can smoke in our second break". Winnie rolled her eyes “okay bye, see ya” and left the two of you alone.

The moment she was gone you both began to grin wide and moved closer into each other’s arms “you… were so fucking hot when you cut Winnie off like that” Cairo said in a turned on way while moving closer to your face. You chuckled slight “I didn’t even meant to be mean” this made Cairo shook her head and laugh slight. You used the moment to wrap both arms around her and kissed her slowly. Feeling her smile on your lips. She felt like your soft and gentle lips were made for her, and she felt so happy that you accepted her feelings and was showing them through your actions and words. She didn't want to pull away or even stop for a minute now as she felt so happy and loved right now. Cairo loved you so much right now and she just wanted to kiss you and be intimate with you as much as she could now. This felt like a dream to Cairo and she couldn't be happier right now.

156 notes · View notes

deonsx · 8 months

Note

Request again! I’m so sorry for requesting fast. You’re the only one who accepts my request.

Can you do a s/o that really powerful? Like have a really strong ability yet she keep it secret, and after 2 years of dating they finally found out after they got attacked by enemy organization? Fyodor, Jouno and Tecchou?

Sorry, it’s too detail. I just can’t hold my happiness after you accepted my request! You just lightens my entire day! <3

This message made me very happy! I haven't been able to write for a long time because I've been busy. I will be online as much as I can and feel free to share your requests with me!

Feat: Dazai, Fyodor, Jouno, Tecchou

A S/o Who Surprises Them With Her Power

Summary: Since you couldn't control your ability since you were little, it's been hurting people and now it's time to use it

Dazai Osamu

It was an ordinary day, until the agency was attacked by the port mafia. Under normal circumstances, you don't have to worry because the agency can handle this on its own or you can provide some help from time to time, but they are really so small that they cannot be felt

But suddenly everything changed, the whole team went to different areas and tasks on different calls and you were currently handling some file work at the agency with your boyfriend. "Bella bella, look at your luck, there are only two of us left!!"

You rolled your eyes at his affectionate speech, a quick explosion shook the agency as you laughed, "What's going on!?" You asked as you ran away from the shaking building. When you finally landed on the street, Port Mafia's men surrounded you. Dazai's ability was useless right now, so what were we supposed to do?

You thought maybe we could get away, but you heard a gunshot and saw your boyfriend get shot in the arm as he pulled to protect you. “Damn!” Osamu whimpered in pain, it's happening again, someone gets hurt whether you use that ability or not, You forced yourself to focus.. I think it was finally time for you to use that ability. The ground suddenly started shaking and everything started shaking like a big earthquake. "What's going on? We should notify the boss!" The voices of the men across the street filled your ears, "We are retreating!" But no, you couldn't let them escape, especially when they injured the man you loved most, you tried to control your strength and caused a huge crack to open in the ground. All the sounds were the men's screams

When everything was over, you looked at your boyfriend, but your eyes were trembling, it meant a lot to you that he was hurt. "Y/o you.." the brunette looked at you with his eyes, ignoring the bullet in his arm. "I-I really didn't mean for it to happen like this.." your boyfriend's serious face quickly softened and His hand caressed your hair, "Shh, everything is over.." he placed kisses on your hair and said that this is what you have been afraid of all this time "I would never blame you, my beloved"

Fyodor Dostoyevski

As usual, you were at the computer desk and writing a lot of reports, but your boyfriend still hadn't returned home, you felt a slight fear, you knew how strong the man was, but where was he right now?

Out of curiosity, you left him calls on the phone, but since there was no response, he quickly became worried, but you remained cool and decided to leave the house and go to work. As you started to approach the workplace with your car, you saw that the building was on fire. You panicked, stopped the car right there and quickly got out

You quickly examined the building and walked around it. When you reached the dead end, you heard the sound of pointing a gun behind you. "So it's you? Our target was your boyfriend, but you wouldn't be a good reward?" Looking at the men next to you they laughed at each other and took steps towards you your head pushed you to do the first thing that came to your mind and you quickly summoned your ability

The surrounding buildings shook rapidly and covered the street behind which was their escape area. You couldn't control your strength when you were nervous, you quickly picked up a large piece from the ground and threw it on the men and everywhere turned into dust and smoke.. as the voices became quieter, you slowly knelt down and tried to catch your breath in the dusty air

There was a sound of walking behind the smoke and fog. You tried to gather yourself against the enemy, but you saw a familiar face. "Fyodor..?" you called out to him with your light voice "What happened here..you were supposed to be at home s/o" fyodor did not hide his surprise at the unexpected event "I-I was just worried.." fyodor increased his steps towards you and knelt down and put his hand on your chin "How long have you been hiding from me.. .Why are you hiding my love?”

"I didn't want you to see me like that, I can't even control myself” Those light purple eyes narrowed and finally closed while taking a deep breath "I understand.. you must be tired, let's go home, dear”

Jouno Saigiku

The two of you were finally having a leisurely breakfast at a cafe. It wasn't easy to convince him because he kept saying "We have to work", "We have work to do, we can't take a break", "We can't relax", but eventually you convinced him and you were having a comfortable breakfast with him and there was a beautiful happiness on his face. "You're so happy... all we do is run away from work"

"You're whining all the time, enjoy the moment, jouno..." You muttered to him while he was eating his food by himself. While you were both eating your meals, there was an explosion from the next building, your office building, and the whole cafe shook. "What is this!?" Jouno shouted as he quickly stood up, you both fled the cafe and ran towards the explosion at work

You looked at the building that turned into a battlefield and you both looked at each other and ran into the building. The fog was making it difficult to see around you as you covered your nose due to the smoke. When you came across the corpses of the people working with you inside, you looked at your boyfriend in fear. "They.." Jouno spoke without letting the frustration out. "We have to find the boss! We don't have time!"

You probably ran towards the locked door, but neither of you could open the door due to your efforts. "Jouno! blood!" you said blood coming from under the door, as your boyfriend smelled the blood a voice was heard from behind "I think someone lost their direction" you turned your head towards the male voice "S/o! stay behind me!" Your boyfriend spoke as he drew his sword defensively towards the man

The enemy in front of you quickly took his hand to the metal gun and sabotaged your boyfriend's gun. "It's such a shame to be looked down upon.." you brought your hand up to the man as his steps approached you and quickly threw them back to save yourself and your boyfriend from the situation. The man quickly ran away from the flying table coming towards him from you. "Wow! "I didn't know, look, my fun is going to get even bigger" your boyfriend paused for a moment in confusion but then quickly overpowered him while his mind wandered

When all the events stopped, you and Jouno were in front of the collapsed building. "Why did you feel the need to hide it from me, s/o?" your silence was eerie but understandable to him "I would have supported you if you had told me..please don't let this happen again"

Tecchou Suehiro

It was a tiring day. When you woke up, your boyfriend was not in your bed. You realized that he was doing his usual training with the sound of breathing coming from the living room. You lifted your quilt, leaned against the door of the living room with your cotton nightgown, and looked at your boyfriend doing push-ups

You watched his half-naked body move up and down. The dirty thoughts that came to your mind quickly went away and you let your voice reach his ear. "Who is this handsome man? And he is in my house, am I in a dream?" Tecchou slowly stopped and crossed his legs, turning to you and giggling, "hahh, it's a really fresh morning" he smiled at you, making the serious expression on his face disappeargf

You had breakfast together and left the house and your boyfriend decided to walk you instead of driving "ahhhh I hate this sports stuff!" tecchou was continuing on his way ignoring you. When you heard the building next to you being combed with guns, a serious look appeared on both of your faces, "s/o go around that side! We have to protect the innocent!"

You both separated to the sides and you used your strength to push a pregnant woman away from the rock that came towards her. While doing this, you felt someone running towards you from behind and you quickly turned around and activated your power. The ground quickly split open and the person who came disappeared in an instant

When it was all over you saw your boyfriend running to you yelling "s/o! are you okay!? how did this crack in the floor form?" he asked you looking confused and kneeling down he waited for an answer from you the serious expression on his face scared you "It's just..while I wanted to protect.." tecchou's face followed you around slightly and when he took you under his cloak you saw the serious expression on my face looking at you with low soft eyes, He left a long kiss on her head, "Darling, no one should know about this but us, I will protect you”

Enjoy!

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mrghostrat · 6 months

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ok OK listen. here are my latest streamer au thoughts before i try to hop off for the day:

i love "married couple madly in love that no one realises are together because they're so different" but i am also terrible at fic planning for established relationships, and my favourite part about aziraphale/crowley is the lead up and the pining

so what if......... "streamers who no one realises are roommates because they're so different" AND "roommates who are secretly madly in love with each other but are so focused on keeping their own infatuation secret they don't notice it's reciprocated until thousands of online strangers start to point it out" ?????

fic concept: crowley and aziraphale are two full time streamers living together. they have their own spaces. but they mesh bizarrely well as roommates, and have come to really enjoy the routine of eating dinners, grocery shopping, and spending their days off together. there's still some distance between them, that shy sort of "i want to show him something– oh his door is closed, i better not bother him," invitations are actual invitations rather than "i'm doing this and you're coming with me," and they're not a CrowleyAndAziraphale unit yet.

both chats are going mad trying to figure out why crowley's roommate's voice is so familiar, and where they've seen that red hair in the corner of aziraphale's screen before. there's conspiracy theories and a subset of shippers (stoked by both crowley and aziraphale's occasional penchant to sigh and vent about a vague crush they haven't named, but is definitely their mysterious roommate if you watched every stream and collaborated on an elaborate google doc to connect all the dots together) but their mods are the only ones who know they live together. (and ship it. of course they know about the crushes and ship it to death and are just watching with popcorn waiting for these idiots to figure it out)

some people piece it together with all the off hand mentions and mid stream tea deliveries, and more start to believe them when crowley drags aziraphale to a twitchcon event and they're seen being friendly in photos together. they're also aware of people constantly asking and guessing about their illusive roommates, but when crowley finally pops up on an aziraphale stream, both streamers are startled at just how insanely their communities react to the innocuous reveal.

nothing changes for aziraphale and crowley. they were never intentionally hiding the fact, so they just continue referring to each other in their normal vague terms. but now when a new viewer is like "who's your roommate?" long time subs with the lore will fill them in. and it very quickly starts to sound like "crowley lives with aziraphale, that wholesome kitchen streamer. someone's made a clip comp, you should go watch. it's adorable they're so in love" and crowley sees these messages like what the FUCK are yall talking about in here on this day, and bans a message for the first time in six months.

aziraphale of course sees none of these messages because he's a fuckin luddite and can't keep up with chat.

or. maybe he's just choosing not to acknowledge them. because if chat can see he's in love with crowley, does that mean crowley can see it too? and that is just unacceptable and terrifying to him, so he smiles and quickly starts explaining how to saddle stitch a book spine even though literally nobody asked

(anathema, newt, and nina have worked their way through the flavoured popcorn seasonings anathema's aunt sent her for christmas, and are now experimenting with homemade seasoning recipes together) (if maggie knew about all this, she would have put her foot down and demanded they talk to aziraphale and crowley about having a conversation)

#ineffable streamers #good omens #listen someone asked me for a longfic and i want to provide it #streamer au could be PERFECT

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skinnypaleangryperson · 3 months

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My heart is broken over this gray world and this life dedicated to slavery by selfish people who are just playing sheep differently taking control of me and paying me so little that I can't even have a decent personal life to make up for crushed creative dreams. I hurt myself with my own imagination and how vivid it is, the TV shows that I would have liked to work on an extended with my passion and ideas, the artistry the lights, the emotion the storytelling, the storyboards and the artistic lighting that I work on every day simply because it's all that makes sense to me. These images, thoughts, storytelling, emotions, everything where I pour all of my desperation of what I wish the humanity and connection that my life would have into a couple of iPad drawings every day in the corner of an empty bedroom.

It comes across as melodramatic posting about it online, but if you were to live a day in my life with having nothing except for my raw isolated imagination in such a repetitive, soulless, compassionless gray world, where I have no connection to anyone anymore, and no one that I can share anything with and convinced I will never have a true friendship or relationship with anyone outside of baseline tolerance at best again, on top of failed motherhood and a failed creative career, you would be crying out on the internet every second you got the chance to. I haven't wanted to live this life for the longest time that I could remember, and I will never want to again. In a sense, thank God nobody cares and that I can just post about it at whatever whim that I want throughout the miserable day, because this is the only place left where I can still feel somewhat human, and where I can just be as unashamedly detailed about every single depressed and morbidly despairing thought, share some of my work, even if it's only to myself just to prove that it even exists outside of my own sick corner of the world, and generally to feel seen for a little while, Even if only by myself, which is what me and the majority of people in working class America have, with no way out, because we're not "special", And if you have an artistic vision it will break your heart more than anything else.

I especially love this scene that I came up with it during my on maladaptive daydreaming lately with my family with BoJack and Samantha and Harper. The storylines that I come up with his family and with our girls are always incredibly vivid every single day and they both still simultaneously break my heart, because I know that the vision that I share in the passion that I have and my want to share in storytelling will only ever be an ongoing sickly headspace in the back of my head while the gray reality of a life that has long since over if it ever began goes on around me without change. The beauty of the family life that I wanted to have on top of the creative dreams that I have that has projected itself into the muddled mental disorder of maladaptive daydreaming of my beautiful family with Bojack both is the only thing that keeps me going throughout the empty slave hours of my life, which is so lonely that most people I'm convinced would not be able to live it, well at the same time fills me with such a beauty and meaning taking it in that I couldn't ever let it go.

#bojack #maladaptive daydreaming #🫡#Lost my mind #I mostly just use social media to grieve these days while I continue to live the graveyard of my life in reality #My life failed beyond comprehension in every possible way

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