#Am I too sensitive about this subject? Nobody else I’ve talked to seems to be bothered by this lol

[karuuhnia]

Link needs years of therapy after upgrading his gear to lvl 4...

#botw #totk #breath of the wild #tears of the kingdom #((This is a shitpost #but please don’t tell me I’m the only one who is incredibly freaked out by the great fairies in botw/totk #I hate how they outright sexually assault Link and it’s played for laughs. #Imagine if the gender roles were reversed - there would be an outcry! #Am I too sensitive about this subject? Nobody else I’ve talked to seems to be bothered by this lol #anyway enjoy this shitpost I've spent way too much time on lol))

[yuriko-mukami]

Chapter 01

(( @ruki--mukami​‘s Admin and I have been writing YuRuki origin story together for a while now. This is the first chapter of that story. This project is so much fun and has already helped me to grow as a writer which I’m forever grateful. It’s also interesting to see how our styles are mixing together while writing.

Note that this story will contain NSFW content later and it has themes that can be triggering. And since it’s a DL fanfic there obviously will be biting and blood. Avoid reading if you are sensitive or a minor. ))

Prologue

The coolest guy in our classroom and yet… Is he as much of a book geek as I am?

Two weeks had passed and Yuriko had somewhat adapted to her new life in Ryoutei Academy. She was still rather tired but it was getting easier and easier to sleep by day and stay up by night. What wasn’t that easy was getting along with other students. Some of her classmates were rather odd, and she wasn’t sure what to think about them.

The Sakamaki brothers stood out for sure even though only two of them were in the third year… and one of them was a no show. Yuriko had only heard about Sakamaki Shu, not seen him in person, not that she really cared anyway. Sakamaki Reiji was another story, he was like an honor student in their class. Though Yuriko had noticed that there was someone else who probably outsmarted him.

Mukami Ruki.

She now knew his name. He seemed to always read books between classes if he didn’t leave the classroom and he knew all the right answers too. By now Yuriko was sure there wasn’t a subject that was his weakness… which was a polar opposite from her. She had so much catch up to do.

And yet here she was, in the library at lunch hour, looking for something to read for fun when she should have been studying and not thinking about anything fun at all. Yuriko let her fingertips travel along the edge of the shelf while she read the titles from the backs of the books. She didn’t really know what she wanted to read now, only that she needed an escape from everything.

Yuriko’s eyes stopped at Brontë. She had read Wuthering Heights earlier but maybe that was something she needed again right now. That story was so intense on every level; it didn’t let you focus on anything else when you were absorbed between pages. Yuriko reached her hand to grab the book but at the same time there were other fingers going after it too. They touched hers only briefly but their coolness made Yuriko almost jump.

She turned only to meet those steel-blue orbs she had avoided with all her might. Her hand shook as she lowered it.

“I… I’m sorry… You can… take the book, Ruki-san,” she said. Her voice was a mere whisper, and she dared not to look at him again. Her gaze wandered downwards while she was wondering if she should back down completely. 

Sure, Yuriko wanted to make friends in her new school, but… Ruki was… one of the cool guys. There was no way she could talk to him or be his friend even though he was the most interesting one. It was curious how nobody made fun of him even though he was always reading those books with heavy topics. But maybe it was because everybody saw him as cool as she did.

When Ruki was this close Yuriko could smell the masculine and captivating scent of his cologne… at least she thought it was that. And here she was once again thinking something she really shouldn't. Back then these kinds of thoughts had been the start of all her problems, and the last thing she needed now was more of those. 

“Oh? I didn’t take you for the type who’s into gothic romance. Isn’t this book too dark and depressing for someone as meek as you?” Ruki withdrew his cold, slender fingers from the book. “You can have it. It looks like you need it more than I do. I’ve read Wuthering Heights before, actually.” He leaned slightly forward, looking at Yuriko with puzzled yet curious eyes. 

“I’ve… read it before… too…” Yuriko whispered, still not meeting his eyes. Her heart was beating so fast now. She swallowed thinking she should just leave now or at least choose a different book.

“You know, it’s rude not to make eye contact when I’m speaking with you,” Ruki commented in a low, authoritative voice, clearly aware of how often she averted her gaze from him. He snatched her chin in his hand and angled her head upward, forcing their eyes to meet. 

Yuriko stared at Ruki with wide eyes; her whole body tensed when she felt his cool fingers on her chin. Suddenly it was hard to breathe. She wanted to run away but was unable to move even her toes. No, actually she wasn’t because she felt how her toes curled in her shoes. What was this? Why did she react like this? 

I’ve never been this close to a boy… and he is more like a man already, she thought. This was the first time a boy touched her like this, and not even Haruko had treated her like this. Her touches had always been gentler and softer, feminine touches; and there was definitely something harsh in the way Ruki was holding her chin. He didn’t hurt her, but his grasp wasn’t tender either.

“I… I am really sorry… if I have offended you somehow, Ruki-san.” Yuriko did her best to keep her voice as steady as possible, yet it trembled a bit. “If you let me go… I just… We need Heike Monogatari for that literature class, ri-right? I think I'll go look for that in-instead.”

He clicked his tongue in disappointment. “I’m not done talking with you yet,” Ruki’s voice remained cold, almost apathetic. “Besides, that book hasn’t even been assigned yet. Either you want to get a serious head start, or you’re looking for reasons to run away. Do I intimidate you that much?” 

“Umhh…”

Yuriko knew all too well that the said book hadn’t been assigned to them yet but she also knew that she needed to get serious with her studies if she wanted to graduate this time. Though that wasn’t really the reason why she had thought of Heike Monogatari just now. Ruki was right… but she couldn’t tell him that. There were so many things she couldn’t say in front of him. He was so smart, calm and collected; he wouldn’t even understand her struggles. And there was no way she would reveal that she had already failed the third year once. That was too embarrassing, shameful even.

Though Yuriko didn’t quite understand why Ruki cared about her motives. Why did it matter to him if he intimidated her? Or if she was trying to get a head start? It wasn’t his business in any way. 

“I… just want to make… sure… that… umhh… If I read it early on… then… I… ehmmm…”

Yuriko’s eyes started to wander around the library again. It seemed they were alone in here, and the thought made her heart beating even faster. How did other girls do this? Yuriko had seen them chatting with boys without problems, but it seemed she wasn’t able to have even one casual conversation. Though there was nothing casual about the way Ruki was holding her chin. Her skin would probably never forget his touch.

Yuriko took a couple of deep breaths and tried to calm down her jumping heart. There was no reason to get this agitated just because they had reached for the same book… and maybe there was something else Ruki wanted to talk about. If Yuriko just acted as normal as she could then he surely would let her go… and she could pretend that any of this—whatever this was—had never even happened.

“Um… you know, it doesn’t matter. If… if you aren’t done talking with me… then…” Why was this so hard?! Yuriko nibbled her lower lip for a while before forcing herself to look Ruki into the eyes. Those steel-blue orbs deep as the ocean… She couldn’t help but wonder what was going on behind them. For a moment those eyes took her as a prisoner, captured her as the heat rose on her cheeks. The heat so burning that she was sure she would be consumed with it.

When did he imprison me like this?

Yuriko couldn’t look around herself anymore. All she saw were those eyes.

Captured.

What was with her? Yuriko wasn’t the type to fall for someone instantly and easily… and of course she wasn’t falling for Ruki. They’ve only known each other for a couple of weeks and never before talked to one another. She felt like this because the situation was so strange, but there was nothing more in it. Ruki was being so forceful with her, and it was only natural for her to get scared because of it. This must be the reason why nobody made fun of him ever.

Forced my gaze into his.

Yuriko blinked. Her face was so hot that she was now afraid she would faint soon. Nothing like this has ever happened to her. She decided then and there that she would keep her distance no matter what. From now on she would be more careful and stay out of his way, starting from the moment he would let her go.

“The way your eyes flicker back and forth… I wonder if it is mere intimidation after all. Perhaps it’s not that simple,” Ruki paused for a moment, his cold exterior turning into a confident smirk as Yuriko was frozen in his grasp. “Do I scare you? Or do I captivate you instead? Either way, whatever it is you’re feeling at this moment will only enhance your flavor.” 

The hand that held her chin began tracing her jawline. It wasn’t an affectionate touch by any means, but instead it was as if Ruki was thoroughly examining her face, eyes piercing straight through her. His forefinger trailed down along the column of her neck in a slow but steady motion. 

“That scent of yours has piqued my interest since the day you first arrived at this school. Immediately I knew there was something different about your blood,” alarmingly sharp fangs peeked through his spreading smile, a smile so wicked it would set her stomach aflame with anticipation of his unpredictable movements. His once ice cold eyes were now burning into her, a hint of mirth to those steel-blue depths, like a predator who just caught his prey. 

Ruki leaned his head toward where his hand had been tracing. “I’d like to satisfy this curiosity of mine,” he murmured hauntingly. Without hesitation his fangs soon pierced into Yuriko’s neck and his fingers were now digging into the sides of her forearms, restraining her movement like a beast kneading its prey with ferocious claws. A grunt of pleasure escaped his lips as the metallic taste filled his mouth completely, its hot silky texture cascading over the vampire’s tastebuds. It was as if Ruki sought to hear her screams of pained pleasure with each excruciating plow of his fangs. Her blood had definitely exceeded all his expectations; the smell from her papercut two weeks ago that had so easily captured his attention couldn’t hold a candle to this. Yuriko tasted so sweet, and her fear was icing on the cake. 

At first Yuriko couldn’t move nor say anything; her mind went blank when Ruki’s fangs sank into her skin. It was as if her brain couldn’t comprehend the situation. It was so absurd, so impossible, straight from a horror novel. The pain hit her and it was the most intense she had ever felt and at the same time it was the most intimate moment she had shared with anyone when his lips were touching her skin. Ruki had invaded her personal space the way she wouldn’t ever have imagined.

A few seconds later Yuriko pushed her hands towards Ruki’s chest as a scream left from her lips. Her whole body shook in his grasp but she tried to push him away and twisted her neck even though it only made the pain worse.

“No! Don’t! Stop it!!!”

The pure horror swiped over Yuriko as she struggled. What was this? Why had Ruki attacked her this way? Has she really seen fangs?! But… but… it wasn’t possible! No human had fangs and… vampires… they didn’t exist! ...or did they?

Tears filled Yuriko’s eyes. She gasped for air almost desperately, hitting Ruki’s chest with her tiny fists.

The vampire simply wouldn’t budge. In fact, her fists pushing his chest felt like a mere tickle against his unwavering stature. Gripping her wrists, Ruki continued drinking the delectable red streaks that ran down the punctures he had inflicted in her neck. After drinking a considerable amount of her life force, he paused for a moment, briefly lifting his lips from her flesh. 

“Don’t resist me,” he growled before returning to her neck. His tone was colder than before, chilling to the bone. Once more his fangs met with her flesh and he savored the sweet taste of her blood. 

“Please, no! Don’t do this!!” Her voice was high pitched and trembling, words mixed with her sobs. Memories from her previous school flashed before her eyes but nothing compared to this, nothing like this had ever happened, this was something she couldn’t understand… Why? Why did Ruki do this?

The pain and fear were too much. Yuriko felt how her legs started to give up, going numb, at the same time as her field of vision began to fade to black. She was sinking, drowning to the place where there was no pain.

After deciding Yuriko had endured enough, Ruki pulled away from her, finally removing those dagger-like fangs from her neck. “Just as I thought, your blood truly is of the finest quality.” He smirked, wiping away the excess blood off his lips with the back of his hand. “Who would’ve thought someone as timid as yourself was harboring such sweet blood all along?” 

The vampire looked down at her wobbly legs as they shook uncontrollably, trying so hard not to succumb to the strain and exhaustion. “Was having your blood sucked for the first time really so painful? Hmph, what an eyesore, watching you tremble from just a few bites. Right now you’re nothing more than livestock.”

"Li-livestock?" The word left Yuriko's mouth as she leaned her back against the bookshelf. She was sure she would soon fall to the floor if she didn't get a hold of something. Her fingers grabbed the edge of the shelf still trembling while her other hand traveled to her neck touching the sore spot which Ruki's fangs had just left.

"This can't… this can't be… There are no such things as… vampires…"

Yuriko wanted to run but she wasn't sure if she could trust her own legs right now. And where would she even go? They were in the same class… Ruki would always be there. Though… there were others in that classroom, so would it be safe?

Did the others know about this? Did they know what Ruki was? Was there someone who could help Yuriko out? But there was a chance that no one would believe her if she told about this… and she could take a risk that people would start making fun of her again.

"Why… why… did you do this? I…" 

She didn't know what to say, so she started slowly inch sideways further from Ruki. She knew she shouldn't skip classes, not again, but there was no way she could go back to that classroom now. Not when there were aching bite marks on her neck.

“Looks like class will start again soon. I’ll be taking my leave.” The vampire headed for the library’s exit, leaving Yuriko in her discombobulated state. 

I shouldn’t do anything Just keep my distance, forget

#yuriko tsukino #ruki mukami #yuriko's story

[proxylynn]

Underfell: File Name not Edgy Enough #27

Chapter 27: Burden

WARNING: I WANT NO RESPONSIBILITY OVER SPOILING THINGS FOR OTHERS. THAT BEING SAID, THIS IS HOW FILE NAME NOT FOUND WOULD FUNCTION IN THE AU OF UNDERFELL. BEFORE YOU READ THIS, UNLIKE THE NICE TIME OF UNDERTALE, THIS WORLD IS KILL OR BE KILLED. THIS STORY WILL BE GRAPHIC, GORY, USE SWEARS LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS, AND DEAL WITH SENSITIVE SUBJECT MATTERS. FOR EXAMPLE, THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE READ THE FILE NAME RELOCATED SPOOF WILL KNOW HOW I PICTURE THIS VERSION OF LYNSIE COMING TO THE UNDERGROUND. IT IS NOT AN ACCIDENT. IT IS NOT BECAUSE OF SOMETHING DUMB. IT IS BECAUSE SHE CHOOSES TO END HER LIFE. SO TAKE THIS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. I MADE IT BECAUSE I NEEDED TO LET SOME OF THIS EDGINESS OUT OF MYSELF. WHICH I GUESS MAKES UNDERFELL LYNSIE EVEN MORE TRUE TO WHO I REALLY AM. ANYWAY, ENJOY. ^_^

------------------------------------------------------------------------

[A quick recap]

My melancholy blinds me to my current surroundings. I only come out of it once a spotlight hits me.

"The hell...?"

Things look funny. No doubt it's a setup by Mettaton. But I'm unsure what this act is. I mean, it looks like a receptionist's waiting room. A desk and some random chairs.

"GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTS...!"

Mettaton zips in wearing a red suit and shoves me in a chair as he takes center stage.

"FIRST AND FOREMOST, WE HERE AT MTTTV WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE LACK OF ME OVER THE COURSE OF THE PROGRAM. DUE TO THE LACK PREP WORK WITH MY COSTAR HERE, WE SADLY HAD TO FORGO A THRILLING ACT BACK IN LEVEL TWO INVOLVING HUNDREDS OF EXPLOSIVES!!"

I so freaking called it. I should let him have his moment...Nah!

"I thought you said that act was shit anyway?"

He extends an arm to cover my mouth.

"FORGIVE HER. SHE'S LOST A LOT OF BLOOD AND NOT ALL THERE MENTALLY."

I leer at him flatly.

"BUT...DARLING HERE IS GOING TO MAKE AMENDS WITH US ALL RIGHT NOW. IT'S TIME TO ANSWER SOME BURNING QUESTIONS."

I'm so confused as he lets go and leaps onto the desk, posing dramatically.

"IT'S TIME FOR..."

A large neon sign shaped like him drops from the ceiling.

"BURNING THE MIDNIGHT OIL WITH A KILLER ROBOT! THE LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW HOSTED BY YOURS TRULY."

Huh. Not a bad title.

"I thought you were working on a courtroom trial program?"

He scoots to now sit behind the desk.

"UNFORTUNATELY, WHILE I DO HAVE THE FUNDS, I DON'T HAVE AVAILABLE WORKERS TO MAKE SUCH A SET. SO...WE'RE DOING THIS INSTEAD."

"Heh...Must be hard to meet your expectations."

"DARLING, YOU HAVE NO IDEA."

A tense dramatic score plays.

"SO, DARLING...ARE YOU READY TO TELL ME EVERYTHING?"

Ah. I see now. Fine, Metta, have it your way. Just be careful what you wish for. You may not like it. Now don't get me wrong. I know my limits. I'm not about to tell him EVERYTHING. I'm not that stupid. But if he wants truth, he's going to get a version that's missing some characters and other junk.

"As you wish. You wanna know the truth? You want to scar the entire Underground? Sure. Why not. What else do I have to lose at this point since you exposed me? So congratulations! I hope you like the prize you've been longing to get. Because I sure as hell don't."

Let the show commence.

[Now our featured presentation]

"RIIIIGHT...ANYWAY...WHY NOT INTRODUCE YOURSELF. LET THE UNDERGROUND KNOW JUST A BIT ABOUT YOU."

I wave with a stupid grin to where I think a camera is.

"Howdy, monsters of the Underground. My name is Lynsie. Last I checked, I'm 5'8'', twenty eights years old, born November 7th, am a Scorpio, blood type A+, and enjoy long naps by the beach."

Am I introducing myself or recording a dumb dating profile video?

Mettaton whips out some cards from his desk.

"REALLY? YOU'RE THAT OLD? HUH."

"Yeah. Why?"

"YOU LOOK OLDER THAN THAT."

I sneer.

"It's the raccoon eyes. Insomnia is a hell of a slap to the face."

"THAT ASIDE...HOW ARE YOU FEELING? YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH A LOT SINCE THIS PROGRAM STARTED."

"I'm grateful to have this reprieve. It's nice to not be flung into fight after fight for a moment. I don't like fighting. I'd much rather avoid any conflict if able."

"SUCH A KIND GIRL. ARE ALL HUMANS THESE DAYS LIKE YOU?"

I eye him funny.

"WHAT?"

"Do mean 'kind' or 'stupid'? Because every monster has called me a fool for being nice."

"STUPID IS A STRONG WORD. NAIVE IS MORE LIKE IT."

I rumble lowly in my seat.

"But...To answer you properly, no. Not all humans are like me. Or...I'm not like most humans."

"OOOOH~, SUCH AN AMBIGUOUS ANSWER. FINE THEN, IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE LIKE THAT, I'LL HAVE TO BE MORE BLUNT IN MY QUESTIONS. LET'S SEE..."

He flips through some of his cards.

"OH! HERE'S ONE...HOW DID YOU COME TO FIND YOURSELF IN THE UNDERGROUND?"

Blunt? I'll give you blunt.

"Easy. I tried to kill myself."

[SNOWDIN: Skeleton House in present time]

The mood in the room sours as the human continues.

"Yep. You see, Mt. Ebott has a reputation, a legend dating back lord knows how long, that those who climb the mountain never return. This has made it a popular place to die. Not as bad as the literal 'Suicide Forest' of Japan, but it does the job okay."

Mettaton's screen blacks out.

"Don't give me that look. You wanted this. You wanted the truth. So take it. Take the blunt no holds bar truth of the matter. And you know what else? It wasn't the first time either. I can think of at least five other attempts. Each more pathetic than the last. But, if memory serves me right, I do believe my very first try was when I was still so very small. Somewhere around age six to eight. I had learned that apple seeds contain cyanide, a very toxic poison. Of course, there's not a heck of a lot in a single seed, but if you ingest a lot...well...Kid me didn't know how many were needed. Just that it was deadly. As you can see, I didn't have enough and I didn't try that form of suicide again. I don't try the same kind twice. I'm too fearful of messing things up the second time. What if it only partly works and I end up surviving? Heh...Trying to end it all only to live but in even worse condition? The irony would be such a hilarious joke. Then again, that's my life in a nutshell. One big cruel unrelenting joke."

Toriel's eyes water. She knew her child had her demons, but she knew not just how far back they spawned. Mettaton's screen relights.

"I...I WASN'T EXPECTING..."

"Yeah, no one does. No one expects me to be so dark. But what can I say? I do a damn good job hiding it."

"BUT...WHY THOUGH? WHAT WOULD MAKE A CHILD THAT BENT ON KILLING THEMSELVES?"

She takes a deep breath and lounges back in her chair.

"You ever feel guilty for something? Something you have no idea why you should feel that way for but you just do?"

She runs her hands over her face.

"I don't remember why I asked her that question. Maybe I was just morbidly curious. I knew my siblings were unexpected pregnancies. The eldest never came to be, so whether it was a boy or girl is forever unknown. My brother came about in the randomness of my mom hooking up with my dad. She married my dad because, well, she did like him but also so that he wouldn't be deported once his school visa ran out. He and his family escaped their homeland to start a new life...but did so illegally. Even on the surface, there's no true freedom. Four years into the marriage, I was born. Things only seemed to spiral from there. Dad would stay out drinking. Mom would be pissed. Bro and I would hide in my room and try to keep the fighting out. Mom gave up on him, someone else charmed her heart and would later be the father of my sister. Eight years into this world and they divorce and months later sis is born. She was unknown and with how old mom was at the time, she now suffers from spontaneous seizures."

The girl looks up in thought.

"So a few years ago, I asked mom...Was I unplanned like they were? Was I another surprise baby?"

She looks back down, her face holding a more cold expression.

"No, she told me. You were the only planned one. ...I should've stopped there. *sigh* I then asked...Why? She answered..."

Emotion leaves her.

"We had you in the hopes that you'd fix our marriage."

Silence. Dead silence.

"So much pressure. And to put that on a babe? How was I supposed to solve your problems? How is it my fault you couldn't stand each other when things got rough?! How is a kid supposed to make sure you don't start taking drugs and acquire sixteen felonies?! How is it my job to make sure you don't regret loving someone else?! How is that fair?! Why not take some fucking responsibility for once in your god damn life?!"

She becomes irate, grabbing one of the chairs and beating it into another one till both are useless before ending with a guttural roar that pains the throat in its harshness.

Toriel recalls similar words from her not long after they became close and she found her.

"Child? You're trembling. Is everything all right? Child, please. Just speak to me. Tell me what's wrong."

"I hate you! I hate all of you! You fucking pieces of shit! Why?! Why is it so hard for any of you to care?! I've been missing for days or weeks and none of you care! *sobs* Did you ever love me?! Why did you even bother having me if you don't even care that I'm gone?! *bawling* Why? Why? Someone tell me why...please..."

"I know this isn't the most pleasant of times to ask...But since we've come to know more about each other, I have been curious about something. The humans that fall down here...They tend to not fall down for the happiest of reasons. If it is not too painful...Can you share with me your reason? What made you come to a cursed mountain where none ever return from?"

"*hard sniffling* They used to care. I used to know what it was like to know others cared. I can't remember when they started to pull away. When I became invisible. I just want to know why. Was it something I did? Did I do something wrong? Did I not make them proud? I thought I did everything right. I was a good girl. *voice cracking* I'm a good girl. Aren't I?"

Even Grillby had memories of such talk pop into his head.

"You are an amazing person. You live in his cold place and open this bar to every sad face willing to cast aside their mean spirits for spirits of another kind. You put up with a lot of nonsense, a good bit came from me today, and I'm sorry about that."

"Where is all this coming from?"

"I'm not done. You have been nothing but nice to me. And doing that isn't easy in this world we live in. Since meeting you, you've shown me more kindness than I got from my own family, and this is only our second meeting. Heh, how pathetic is that? I fell into the Underground trying to die, only to end up wanting to live because of the few that showed me any decency. And for that, I give you my thanks."

"Pussycat?"

"I don't know if it was the punch or I'm just in a weird mood. I'm probably making things awkward. No one wants to hear someone ramble about lame junk when at a bar. This is a place people go to forget things. I know I've got a lot I want to forget. Like the three or four times I ran away from home but never had a plan and always had the cops take me back. Or the time I cussed out my grandma because I thought she lost my dog when it turned out my mom had dumped the pup at a shelter and told me it escaped. Or the suicide attempts..."

"Attempts?"

"Oh yeah, there was more than one. Hard to believe, but I'm a very sad person. No, that's being too nice. Depressed is more accurate. 90% of the smiles you see me do are fake. Just part of the mask I wear to hide how truly miserable I really am."

"God, I hate myself. I'm a sad pathetic mess."

Sans now gets a clearer picture of the baggage weighing on her.

"oh! and don't forget, you're making dinner. pap only let that slide because you were practically dead. so don't get any ideas thinking you can get out of it."

"Did you just really say that?!"

"the hell is your problem?"

"Did you really just insinuate she'd harm herself?"

"i dunno...maybe?"

"You can't say that kind of stuff to her!"

"why not?"

"You...You don't know how she came to the Underground, do you?"

"she told me that she fell."

"I'm not comfortable telling you this, seeing as she hasn't and I don't think it's my place, but I can't let you say idiotic things like that."

"okay, weed, you have intrigued me. if she didn't fall, then how did she get here?"

"Well...Falling is how she came to the Underground. But...She didn't fall from an accident."

"you're telling me she..."

"She fell on purpose. She...was trying to die. I don't know about her life on the surface. She doesn't tell anyone about that stuff, not even Mom. But I have been with her since the start and I can tell...Under all that toughness and pass the goofy dork innards...She's very sad deep down."

And that moment that recently happened at Grilbby's.

"enough with the act! you act all calm, with your little quips and remarks. making you look so well put together. but i know better. i know you're just as messed up as the rest of us. so why don't you get off your high horse and get out of my life!"

"You're right. This is an act. Every day, I wake up and I pretend to be this way. To play this role of the girl that never gives in and can smile through it all. I put on my mask and face this world as best that I can. But inside I'm dying. I'm being crushed by insecurities, doubt, depression, and so much negativity that I let myself fall into a pit hoping for the sweet embrace of death. I have attempted to end my life a good handful of times. Each more pathetic than the last. Even now, I'm just a few triggers shy of crumbling into a blubbering mass of tears. Yet there are few things that keep me from doing those bad things now that I'm here. And if putting on this act keeps me in, relative, ease...Then yeah. I'm gonna pretend my ass off that all is fine with me. Because I'm a fucking moron that is too afraid to open up to those closest to me and ask for help!"

Papyrus, of course, takes all this in as vital information he could use against the human. Her emotional and mental instability can be used to manipulate her. Grooming her to be more obedient to his will.

"I'm sorry."

"DAMN RIGHT YOU'RE SORRY."

"No...I mean, I'm sorry for earlier. It was wrong for me to hit you. You just...*sigh* How do I say this without sound like a dweeb?"

"JUST...SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY. DON'T ALTER YOUR WORDS. THEY LOSE IMPACT THAT WAY."

"If that's true, then don't make a big deal out of this."

"W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

"I am an emotional wreck and going through so much internal bullshit that it ain't funny. So know that the stupid things I'm about to say are true because this is making me feel very vulnerable and uncomfortable which I think you feel too."

By now the human was breathing heavily over the shattered remains of once recognizable objects, slowly regaining her composure. She stares at the mess for some time. Mettaton doesn't even try to do anything that could get her attention while in such a state. Eventually, she drops the bits in her hands and takes a seat in the chair she spared. Slumping in remorse and holding her face.

"I'm sorry. That...That was shameful. I'll pay you back for the damage."

"DO YOU NEED A MOMENT?"

She rubs her eyes of faint moisture.

"N-No...No. I'm fine. That...That was just a moment of venting weakness. I normally cry this crap out of my system. But...I'm so sick of crying. Yet...That felt good though. So much pent-up bullshit I don't or can't let out was just dropped like weights off my back. ...Does this count as therapy? Because this feels better than that child physiologist mom sent me to after I ran away...the first time."

"SOUND LIKE YOU DON'T CARE FOR YOUR PARENTS."

"You'd think that, but no. Don't get me wrong. I love my parents. They could've been far worse even with the flaws I've mentioned. Dad never missed work and made sure bills could be paid. Mom always made sure we could eat even if it meant she didn't and often broke the law to do so."

Her head lolls back as she lounges.

"It's easier to dwell in the negatives than the positives growing up. It can make for a bitter soul. This is just the tip of a massive iceberg, there is so much more crap hidden below. But now is neither the time nor place to dive deeper into those murky waters. I'll drown if I stay under too long. *sigh* I don't hate them for the life they brought me into. I'm just...disappointed. Disappointed by the choices they made and things they expected to get from them. Disappointed in myself for allowing all that to have so much of a hold on me. Disappointed...So very disappointed...*long drawn out groan* Could we please leave the personal questions for now?"

"VERY WELL."

He flips through the cards.

"YOU'VE BEEN IN THE UNDERGROUND FOR SOME TIME NOW. HOW HAS THAT BEEN? WHAT IS IT LIKE TO BE A HUMAN AMONG MONSTERS?"

This gets their attention. The human knows better than to tell all. But she's so far been extremely open. They hoped she was of sound mind enough to remember to keep some secrets.

"Even after all the attempted murder...I prefer monsters to humans. Because at least once the fighting is over, things can be somewhat normal. It's like 'hey, I know I just tried to kill you, but do you wanna maybe hang out for a bit?' and then that happens. It blows my mind how there's no animosity or spite afterward. After Humans fight with each other there's no calm, no peace of it being over, hell, a war might break out if it was bad enough. You never know how bad someone feels after and if the grudge they carry will make them go to extreme measures to make them feel better. Well...Except for the Irish. Those lads can tussle and then be all chummy after like it was a bonding experience. Nice folk. Always fancied them. Heh...Kinda like Monsters. A tough outside but nice inside. Maybe that's one of the reasons they were persecuted too. ...God, my kind is trash. All it knows is hate. We even hate ourselves. And one day...That hate will be the end of us."

She moves some hair from her face. A small smile coming to her.

"Moments like this...It's nice. Brief pauses of reflection and repose. Typically I end up doing this kind of thing in my head or I talk to myself. Funny how that works, the mind I mean. It is a self-aware entity in itself that can be both you and not you at the same time yet won't confuse itself by doing so. Probably why the imagination is such vital part of it. *pause* Heh...My bad. Lost myself for a moment. Back on point...Sure, this all began with you nearly killing me and it's probably just leading up to something else. Something good or bad. Yet till that happens...This is nice."

"SPEAKING OF NICE...YOUR LV HASN'T GONE UP FROM ITS BASE LEVEL. WE'VE SEEN YOU GO INTO FIGHTS, SO IT'S NOT THAT YOU'VE AVOIDED THEM COMPLETELY."

"As I've said...I don't like fighting."

"YOU MUST BE AWARE THAT PACIFISUM IS NOT A RECOMMENDED OR AN EASY THING TO DO IN THE UNDERGROUND. IS IT HARD BEING NICE FOR YOU DOWN HERE?"

"Is it hard for a fish to swim or bird to fly? Nice is my default. I don't have it in me to be genuinely mean. I can be rude or even a bitch, but that's only if that was how I was treated first. The real hard part about it is getting others to understand this niceness is real. Some pick it up with no trouble. But others are difficult. Going so far as to think I'm trying to lull them into a false sense of safety as part of an evil human trap. Can you believe that?"

Sans eyes Papyrus who rolls his sockets at his brother, both knowing damn well she meant him.

"EVEN SO, HAS THERE BEEN A TIME WHERE YOU WANTED TO FIGHT BACK? SURELY EVEN I PROBABLY INCURRED SOME IRE FROM YOU?"

She looks at the mechanical machination with a mix of confusion and annoyance.

"Ire is a strong word. True, I'm not happy about this situation. Exposing me for ratings. One of your goons bashing me over the head. The creepy stalking behavior by watching me through cameras. The needless puzzles and fighting. All of it wasn't necessary."

"I DISAGREE. EVERY BIT WAS COMPLETELY NECESSARY."

"Bull crap."

"NOW NOW, LET ME EXPLAIN. REGARDLESS OF YOUR INTENTIONS, YOU HAVE TO AGREE THAT YOU BEING HUMAN DOES CALL FOR CERTAIN MEASURES TO BE TAKEN. HUMANS DEAL PHYSICAL DAMAGE AND MONSTERS ARE WEAK TO SUCH ATTACKS."

"I know that. Get to your point, Metta."

"MY POINT? VERY WELL. MY DATABASE CONTAINS THE COLLECTED INFORMATION WE'VE GATHERED FROM THE PREVIOUS HUMANS THAT CAME BEFORE YOU. EACH WEAKER AND WEAKER AS TIME PASSED. YOU, ON THE OTHER HAND, HAVE BEEN DISPLAYING STRANGE ABILITIES..."

A monitor comes down, displaying the human in her earlier distress and giving off that strange energy.

"NOT TO MENTION YOUR SOUL HAS BEEN CHANGING IT'S COLOR WITHOUT MAGIC INFLUENCE."

The monitor shows the many different colors her soul was throughout the show.

"SO, DARLING, AS YOU CAN SEE EVERYTHING HAS BEEN COMPLETELY NECESSARY. EVERY LITTLE OBSTACLE ALLOWED FOR MORE OF YOUR UNKNOWNS TO BE REVEALED. HOWEVER..."

The monitor goes back up.

"I GET THE FEELING YOU'RE STILL HIDING SOMETHING."

She glares at the robot.

"I repeat, this wasn't necessary. All you needed to do was ask."

She sits up straight and focuses. Her soul emerges...it is a deep dull blue.

"I don't know everything. Seeing as this whole 'soul' thing isn't known on the surface anymore. To use now, the soul is an intangible thing. It leaves when we die and does whatever since no one truly knows what happens after death. But...I do know my soul isn't normal. Not normal from what I've learned here anyway. I possess ten traits for which my soul can become."

Shock smacks them. Even Mettaton spits oil from some port.

"T-TEN?!"

She nods.

"Ten traits. Ten colors. Nine of which are completely fine."

Her breathing falters as she concentrates harder, forcing the soul to change color to her will.

"Blue, integrity. Cyan, patience. Green, kindness. Pink, passion. Purple, perseverance. Orange, bravery. Red, determination. Yellow, justice. White, hope. ...These are my main traits. The nine that make up my core personality. Yet...There is one, the last one, that I will not show you. No matter what."

A question mark appears on Mettaton's screen. Toriel and Sans know full well which one she means.

"WON'T SHOW? HOW COME?"

"That soul is too dangerous. One that I can't control. The black soul of relentlessness."

Papyrus sockets widen. Sans wasn't making it up after all.

"IF YOU TRULY EXPECT ME TO BUY INTO THIS BLACK SOUL NONSENSE THAN YOU BETTER FIND A WAY TO PROVE TO ME THAT IT'S REAL!"

"and how do you expect me to do that? have it triggered and let her kill half the town?"

"OF COURSE NOT! SHE'D NEVER GET THAT FAR INTO SUCH A SPREE ONCE I SLAY HER."

"YOU DON'T THINK I CAN KILL HER?"

"her? sure, you'd kill her no problem. she'd probably let you do it if things got really bad. but the black soul? that's a different story all together."

"YOU TALK AS THOUGH YOU'VE SEEN THIS 'BLACK SOUL' IN ACTION."

"..."

"YOU HAVE, HAVEN'T YOU?"

"that thing isn't something you want to mess with. don't go after something you can't handle."

"YOU DARE THINK THAT PITIFUL CREATURE CAN HARM ME?!"

"no! i don't think it would harm you! i know it would kill you!"

"I have no will over that trait. It consumes me utterly. Coldly targeting anything and everything as a threat, then calculatingly eliminating victims brutally with no remorse by any means. Pain doesn't phase it. It has no fear. But I do. I fear this soul. I fear becoming that...that thing. That beast."

The robot's screen blips.

"YOU MAKE IT SOUND TERRIBLE. IF IT'S AS BAD AS YOU SAY, HOW HASN'T YOUR LV INCREASED? SURELY A MURDEROUS SOUL LIKE THAT WOULD HAVE A BODY COUNT ATTACHED TO IT?"

"I have thankfully been taken out of that state when it happens. My brother down here, the flower you may have seen me with, he's the one that saves me. I don't know how he does it as I only barely register what happens when the Black Soul is in control. But it's one of the reasons why we stay together. He doesn't want to die and I don't want to hurt anyone, so it's a good deal for us both."

"AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT TRIGGERS SUCH A STATE TO HAPPEN?"

"I'm not 100% sure but I have a theory. The worst of times. Moments when I lose all hope or can't take the pain. Mentally and/or physically. It takes over when I can't deal with things. And I guess it tries to 'solve' the problem...by getting rid of it."

Her demeanor is becoming more unsettled as she continues.

"I...I normally am unwilling to share this information. I don't like being personal with strangers. But since this is a live broadcast, and I've basically torn open a can of worms full of my emo baggage, I want this to be known. I need others to understand the danger. Because you all seem to view me as an easy kill. The dumb nice human that doesn't fight back. It'll be easy to get her soul. Hell, if it weren't for the black trait, I'd have given this thing to you guys ages ago. But it's not worth it. There's no point going to the surface, otherwise I'd be more inclined to leave and be subjected to the crap I deal with. And trust me...You don't want to know what I deal with."

Her eyes get dark and her expression serious to the point it's unnerving.

"The death that can possibly happen if the black soul activates and isn't stopped could be limitless. As the bearer of this curse, I remain here. Not because I see less harm if it triggers around monster, hell no. I trust my death to you because I have faith in monster kind being able to handle it. It's because I don't want to risk it being weaponized by humanity. Magic...REAL magic like this is gone from the surface. If it were to be discovered now...Magic will be coveted like any other valuable resource. Blood and dust will be spilled over ownership. The experiments to find a better means of harvesting it, the torture, the suffering, the endless cycle of hate feeding upon the lack of morality. I have no doubt monsters wouldn't even be seen as people. We've done it to different creeds of humanity throughout history, hell we still do it. I...I don't want that for Monsters. Part of me is saying I'm overthinking it, but I can't that optimistic side of me knowing all the fucked up shit Humans do. I don't want you guys to suffer. I don't want to cause harm. I don't want to see any more death! Please!!"

Her eyes are watering and her body trembling.

"I...I-I hate this feeling. This h-helplessness. I'm caged. I'm useless. I'm nothing on the surface. I'm a danger underground. I'm my own worst enemy and I don't know how to fight. *struggling* Why? Why didn't the fall kill me? Why can't I just die? Why am I so weak? I can't even bleed to death!"

She's a mess, weeping into her gloved hands. But Mettaton dismisses this display and keeps going.

"WEAK? YOU SELL YOURSELF SHORT. CLAWING INTO YOUR OWN BODY ISN'T A VERY WEAK THING AT ALL. COME TO THINK OF IT...IN YOUR ENCOUNTER WITH MUFFET, YOU TOLD HER WHY YOU DID IT. CARE TO EXPLAIN WHAT YOU MEANT?"

A recording is played.

["I have just spent an ungodly amount of time trapped in that elevator over there having my soul violated by people that don't even exist anymore on this plane of reality. I have clawed my skin off to stop feeling their hands on me."]

Her face has the look of someone biting their tongue fairly hard to stay in control.

"What's to explain? I meant what I said and said what I meant."

"YOU'RE AVOIDING THE QUESTION, DARLING."

"No. You're refusing the answer."

"YOU SAID YOU'D TELL THE TRUTH!"

"I am!"

Agitation mounts.

"BULLSHIT! HOW THE HELL CAN ANYONE BELIEVE THAT?"

"I don't give a crap if you believe me or not! You weren't the one there!"

"JUST TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED!"

"It doesn't matter! You can't do anything about it! No one can! You can't stop people that break the laws of reality!"

Sans didn't like what he was hearing. And none of them liked that her still exposed soul was sparking with that strange energy.

"THERE ARE NO PEOPLE LIKE THAT!"

"How would you know?!"

"IF EVEN A FLY FARTS ANYWHERE IN THE UNDERGROUND, I KNOW ABOUT IT. IF ANYONE WITH ABILITIES LIKE THAT WERE HERE, THEY WOULDN'T BE UNKNOWN FOR VERY LONG."

"Did you not hear my words? They don't even exist anymore on this plane of reality! You can't find people that are outside time and space, you fucking idiot!"

"I'M THE IDIOT?! DO YOU NOT HEAR YOURSELF?! OUTSIDE TIME AND SPACE?! YOU CAN'T EVEN MAKE A CONVINCING LIE!"

"I'm not lying, you insufferable ego-maniacal narcissistic jackass!"

"TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED!!"

"I did! Accept the fact there is shit in life you can't fathom or comprehend yet is true! Like Bigfoot, life on other planets, or stigmata! Unexplained phenomenons are the backbones of reality! Deal with it!"

"THAT'S NOT AN UNEXPLAINED PHENOMENON! THAT'S A PURE IMPROBABLE IMMPOSSIBLITY!"

"By who's rule?! Are you God?! Do you know every infallible law the universe runs on?! No! You know nothing! No one does! So stop digging for shit that isn't there before something bad happens!"

"THEN GIVE ME A REAL ANSWER!"

"Stop...Please stop!"

"DARLING..."

"I s̷ái͟d͝ s̷t̢̛o̧͘p̀͟!̵̕͜!̧"

A surge of energy bursts from her soul, the flash whites out the screen and hurts the eyes. While blinded they all can hear the garbled sounds of pain and the sudden thud of weight hitting the floor. Their sight comes back to see the human writhing on the ground and gripping her soul, teeth bared in restrained growling.

"DARLING?"

She struggles to make her body move. Just slightly getting her head off the floor.

"Th͜i͞s͠...͜T́h̴i̵s̸ ̛įs ̕y̕our ̛f́aul͝t͏..̢.̴I͜ ͟a͡ske͝d ͠y̕o͏u t̷o͜ ͜s̛top..̢.̵"

The energy courses from her soul over her form, a brighter than normal light emanates from her clutched soul. She weakly pulls herself up to be supported by her free arm and the reason for the light is made clear, a crack has marred her soul. But that is far from the worst part. Sans spots it before Toriel but she's the one that points it out.

"Oh no!"

"What's wrong?"

"The darkness!"

Indeed. Black began to appear in the human's heart. The darkness corrupting the white light and faintly leaking out of the crack. The girl feels this. Panic flashes in her eyes but she's in no condition to handle so much on top of what has already happened.

"Wh̸en̢ wil̡l҉ ̛yo͡u̶ le͘ar͜n.͞..̡Y͘ou ̴fuc̀kín͜g id̴iot.̸..W͢hén wil̡l yoų ́a̶l̢l͜ léar͘n that͏ ̵y͘our act̵i҉o͞ns ͏ha͡v̛e ͘co͡n̴seq͘uenc͘e̶s͘?͘!"

The distortion. The off tone. The malice that seeped out. Perhaps it was enough proof for the automaton to believe her earlier words. For Mettaton seems to be distracted one second and then takes it all seriously the next. One of his hands snakes under his desk and the next thing to happen is the floor beneath the human opens up, dropping her into the unknown. Glitched roaring echoes as she plummets. A sickening crash leads into dead silence.

"WELL...THAT WAS INTERESTING."

His nonchalance about the whole thing is upsetting.

"SADLY, MY CO-STAR SEEMS TO BE HAVING A BIT OF TROUBLE. NOT EVERYONE CAN HANDLE THE STRESS OF BEING IN THE SPOTLIGHT, LIKE MOI."

His flamboyance is rubbing them the wrong way.

"HOWEVER, DESPITE HER TEMPER TANTRUM AND LACK OF COOPERATION, I WILL ASSURE YOU ALL SHE IS NOT DEAD. I MERELY GAVE HER THE SMALL BREAK THAT SHE CLEARLY NEEDED."

It's likely that the break involved her bones or some body part.

"BUT...I CAN GIVE YOU ALL SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO...THIS WAS THE LAST PRELEWD ACT. THE NEXT TIME YOU SEE US TOGETHER, IT WILL BE FOR THE MAIN EVENT. THE FINAL BATTLE APPROACHES, MY ENCOURAGABLE VIEWERS. DO NOT MISS OUT ON THIS HISTORICAL MAKE OR BREAK MOMENT."

The show shifts into a commercial break.

Toriel begins shaking. She can't deal with this much longer. Grillby does what he can to give her support, but he too has much on his mind. His pussycat unloaded a TON of things and a lot of it was incredibly concerning. Papyrus ushers his brother away from the other two as not to be overheard.

"SO...HOW LONG?"

Sans looks at him funny.

"uh...what?"

"HOW LONG WERE THE BOTH OF YOU GOING TO HIDE THIS PART OF THE SECRET FROM ME?"

"um...which part?"

"THAT POWER. SHE HAS TEN TRAITS, SANS. JUST HOW STRONG IS THAT GIRL?"

Sans scratches his skull.

"i honestly don't know, pap. i didn't even know she had that many. my main worry was always the black trait, so i never asked about others."

Papyrus folds his arms and shuts his eyes in thought.

"i swear, i ain't lying to ya."

"I KNOW YOU'RE NOT."

"then...what's wrong?"

"*HUFF* I DON'T LIKE THIS. I DON'T LIKE THE IDEA OF THAT WEAKLING BEING POWERFUL."

His eyes open but look at nothing.

"I SHOULD'VE KNOWN SOMETHING WAS OFF THAT NIGHT...THAT PUNCH...SHE WAS HOLDING BACK SO MUCH..."

Papyrus clenches his fists into tight balls of rage.

"THAT BITCH."

"ya know she didn't want to hurt ya."

"THAT'S THE THING. SHE THOUGHT SHE COULD HURT ME. HOW WEAK DOES SHE THINK I AM? THAT'S WHAT'S PISSING ME OFF MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW."

Sans sighs. One day his brother will taste humble pie and not like it.

[HOTLAND: LAB]

Undyne finishes off her sixth bowel of ramen and looks at Alphys.

"Well...That wasn't how I thought it was going to end. Was it really necessary to tell him to drop her?"

Alphys takes a few more notes and ponders.

"Would you rather there be no main event? Besides..."

She adjusts her glasses.

"If what the human said is true, then the Black Soul being triggered in an open area would result in mass casualties. The zone in which the ending will be shot in is, for the most part, closed and under my remote control. So even in the event of something going wrong, which the odds of such are highly unlikely, then any and all threats can be dealt with in an optimum manner."

Undyne nods.

"I guess that makes sense. Still...I don't what I saw. There was real fear in the human's eyes."

"Good. She should be afraid. She should be very afraid of what's to come."

"And what's that?"

"That would be spoilers."

"Damn it. *sigh* A human soul with ten traits...Sounds tough. I wanna fight it!"

"It does raise a lot of questions. One, in particular, is on my mind."

"What's that?"

"If a human soul, deprived of magic, possesses ten traits and begins gaining magic...What will happen when it attains 100% magic?"

A cold chill runs through the captain.

[HOTLAND: SOMEWHERE ON LEVEL 3]

I am getting so sick of this crap. Why can't I just die at this point?

"*muffled* Lynsie?"

The voice and light jostling is bringing me back to consciousness. Damn it. Here I go again.

My eyes weakly open to the sight of dirt and rock. Just an inch away from losing the ability to see. Like I need a handicap in all this.

"Lynsie? Are you okay?"

Ah, Flowey. It's about time we met back up.

"*groan* H-Hey, bro. I missed you."

He smiles sadly.

"Are you okay? Can you move?"

I roll over on my back and check myself.

[HP ██████████ 10/40]

[HEARTBREAK level ONE in effect]

I figured that's what happened. No wonder the Black Soul was triggering. Thank goodness for the fall knocking my ass out or things would've gone bad fast.

"I think I'll be okay. Sore, but okay. I'm sadly getting used to falling and possible brain damage."

My answer has him pout.

"What's with the face, bro? You know I'm a tough cookie. I'll be fine."

His face gets full of concern.

"I...I heard what you told Mettaton."

Yeah, you and the rest of the Underground.

"I...I understand now why you didn't talk about your past. Why you kept to yourself. I'm sorry."

God, he's too sweet for this place. I reach over and gently stroke his petals.

"I love you, bro. You have no idea how much it means to me that you care. But don't pity me. I do that enough on my own."

I wearily sit up, shaking my head of all that baggage I brought up for the show.

"I wasn't pitying you. It's just..."

He fiddles with his leaves in a shy way but I cut his words off.

"Bro, I get it. I do. It's the same feeling like when you told me your history. Yet, let's be honest here, you're more mentally mature than me and I'm still not completely okay after getting all that off my chest. We can talk more about it later after this ordeal is over. Maybe over mom's cheesecake? Deal?"

"...You mean it?"

"Yeah. I promise."

He smiles brightly.

"Okay. I'd like that."

I pick myself up and stretch, taking a look around at where we are.

"Don't tell me he dropped me back at the start."

"Nope. This is still Level Three. In fact...I do believe MTT Resort is just past this place."

"...For real? Is it a safe space?"

"Yep. There are shops and rooms to rest."

I hear a heavenly choir sing in my head.

"Finally! The universe throws me a decent bone!"

I regret saying that the moment it leaves my mouth. Flowey looks at me funny.

"Don't take that out of context, you know what I meant."

"I don't know. You and Smiley Trashbag are eerily close."

My eye twitches. Things I wish Gaster didn't show me try to pop into my head.

"Are you okay? You look like you're about to puke."

"Never insinuate something like that ever again."

He shakes his head at me. I try to change the subject before I have a heart attack on camera.

"So...Are you able to follow me to the resort? I'm sick of being separated."

"There's ground outside of it and parts I can reach beyond it, but the resort itself I can't get in without some sort of aid like a pot. Cement and tile flooring is a pain to break into."

"Damn, bro, you hella strong."

There's a deactivated reversed conveyor belt that's attached to the artificial platforms.

"Is it safe to cross? It's kinda giving me 'trap' vibes."

"You should be fine. This is normally the part where the colored tiles would be used again, but you know, stuff changed. It's probably off."

"Ah. Gotcha. I guess...See ya soon?"

"You bet."

He ducks into the ground so I take it as my time to leave this pit. The entire time I feel on edge. With my luck, the trap will turn on and I get screwed. Thankfully nothing happens apart from some jets of flame randomly going off in the distance and making me jump like a wuss. At least it got me to the stairs quicker.

After a quite the climb, I reach the top perturbed yet undaunted as a four-way crossroads greets me, though the two paths on the sides are blocked. More Royal Guards, a cat to the left and some kind of insect on the right, both in that imposing armor.

"Well if it isn't my best customer..."

The Ice Scream rabbit pops up from behind the cart I wasn't paying attention to.

"Fancy seeing you again."

As odd as seeing him here is, he's a familiar face that is a sight for my sore eyes. I approach.

"Hey, guy, what's up? Haven't been seeing you much in Snowdin Forest for a bit."

He leans on the cart like a cool guy.

"Yeah...Been moving around seeing if I can make mad gold somewhere where the weather isn't the same temp as my product."

"Any luck?"

"Waterfall wasn't so bad. Even started a new program with rewards cards. Turn in a card with ten punches and get a free doubling of your next order. Speaking of which..."

He reaches into his pants pocket and hands me a punch card. Some holes have already been made.

"If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have had the funds to get this far. So...Instead of starting your card full, I may have added your previous buys. Can't say I haven't gotten better at my wonderful salesmanship."

I can't help but smile. He's come a long way. I'm proud of him.

"Well then, wonderful salesman, I'd like to add some more holes please."

"Heh...sure. But I'm warning you, prices have gone up. 25G. Got to charge more here 'cause of the heat."

"Understood, my dude. Um...Just curious...Got fudge pops? Kinda have this hankering for something chocolate."

He shakes his head.

"Sold out. The Royal Guards bought those like crazy."

"Damn. Oh well. One blue, orange, grape, and blood. All bisicles."

He fills my order and I pay the 100G.

"Here you go. All five ready to enjoy."

I look at him funny.

"Five?"

"Yep. Five. I definitely didn't toss in a strawberry one because of customer loyalty. Nope. Didn't do it."

Must...resist...the urge...to HUG!!

"...Thank you. That...That means a lot."

He gives me a wink and I practically skip away up another set of stairs. I place the treats in my inventory for now. I know not what crap will happen from here, so healing items are a big help.

I am met by a large complex. Redbrick that's been tagged with graffiti, yellow-tinted windows with some broken, a gold MTT sign with two Mettaton images with devil horns, a black & white checkered awning over the door, two large plant potters that have dry withered flower remnants, and a blood-red or just stained that way rug embroidered with gold MTTs.

"Classy."

I'm about to head inside when something hits my leg. A paper airplane? I inspect it to find it's a note.

[Hey! Go up the creepy alleyway on the right for some great deals!]

"...I'm gonna get mugged, aren't I?"

It's against my better judgment, but this is a neutral zone, so I should be okay. I wearily creep around, following spray-painted arrows, to end up finding two girls gossiping among garbage. They notice me and straighten up.

"Hey! Check it out!"

"Yeah! Check it out!"

"So, like, what's up? I'm Bratty, and this is my best friend, Catty."

"I'm Catty, and this is my best friend, Bratty."

Oh no...More valley speak!?! Why is that a thing down here?!

Bratty is a tall, green alligator or crocodile monster that wears a primarily black shawl with yellow and red details on the sides. She has yellow hair that flows into curls and red lipstick.

Catty is a plump purple cat creature who wears a set of black overalls with yellow buttons and tufts of red fur with yellow highlighted tips coming out from under it on either side. She has black hair with a red streak in it and a yellow earring on her left ear.

"Uh...Hi? So...This is a shop?"

"Like, the best shop!"

"You should buy ALL our stuff!"

Catty gets this blanket out and opens it out to show me their items. They don't have much, just four things, but I can't turn away from these items.

[25G - Junk Food - Has a big bite out of it]

[350G - Rusty Revolver - Bullets NOT included]

[350G - Tattered Western Hat - ATTACK up when worn]

[600G - Mystery Key - Probably to someone's house LOL]

A gun...How the fuck is that here?

"Oooh! I know that look!"

"That's the look of some wanting something!"

"Bratty! We're gonna be rich!"

"Where did you find this stuff?"

"I mean, like, where does anyone get guns, or food, or..."

"We found it in the garbage!"

I so called it.

"It's GOOD garbage."

"It's like, really good garbage."

"Where do you get the garbage?"

"Like, the garbage store, duh!!! ...Waterfall mostly."

"I found a gun in a dumpster!"

I check my gold...I don't have anywhere close to 1,300G for their garbage.

"Um...Maybe we could work out some sort of arrangement?"

They glare.

"That's poor talk."

"You need WAY more money."

What I need is to get that stuff away from them. That stuff is bad enough with humans, I don't want monsters messing with crap like guns.

"Ladies, I'm sure there's something we can do. Shops run on trade. This is just a trade of a different kind. I can't give you the gold, but I can get you other things. There's gotta something you'd both want that I can fetch for you in exchange?"

They mull it over.

"Thanks, but we, like, don't really need anything."

"Oh my god, can you go get us some Dazzleburgers?"

"We don't. Really need. Anything."

"Wait! I'll pay you 1000G if you get Mettaton to autograph my butt!"

Catty seems to be the easier one here. Maybe I can work with this.

"While I do know the guy, I'm not sure I can get Metta to sign your butt."

"Damn."

"Wait...You know Mettaton?!"

Their eyes sparkle.

"...Yes?"

They squeal with fanatical glee.

"Oh my God. Mettaton."

"Oh my GOD, METTATON."

"He's like...My robot husband."

"Actually he's like...MY robot husband."

"I think we're like...both going to marry him."

"We're both like, ALREADY married to him. He just, like, doesn't know it yet."

They're insane.

"Okay...Can I ask what's a Razzburger? I could try to get that."

Their eyes widen in shock.

"You don't know what a Dazzleburger is?"

"Do you, like, live under a rock?"

Don't we all do since this is a mountain?

"Dazzleburgers are epic!"

"They're only sold in the resort."

Interesting.

"Inside huh? Let me guess...Very pricey."

Bratty nods.

"The stuff inside, is like..."

"TOTALLY wicked expensive."

"But, like, this stuff we found is like..."

"TOTALLY wicked cheap."

"You should..."

"Like..."

"TOTALLY wicked buy all of it?"

"Cheap? You're selling a random key for 600G!"

They giggle at me and I sigh. Bitches, man...bitches.

"So where inside am I gettin' them?"

"The MTT-Brand Burger Emporium."

"You have to get them from Bugerpants."

That name...That name brings back memories...as well as sore spots. Douche-cat...

"Burgerpants."

"Yeah, that guy from the store. Yuck, what a creep."

"Yeah! He's a creep! But he's kind of cute, too..."

"C'mon Catty, don't you have ANY standards?"

"Nope!!!"

...You need standers, Catty.

"Yeah, I met him. Not so much a creep but he is a massive prick."

"OK, like, the annoying thing is..."

"He'd be OK if he just treated us with some respect."

"But he just acts..."

"Really weird."

"And then acts like it's OUR fault he acts that way!"

"Like, when we asked him to get those Dazzleburgers..."

"He dropped them and ran away before we could even say anything!"

"We were, like, going to share them."

"Really? I wasn't."

"Catty!"

This zone is full of awful people.

"One last thing...How many you want?"

Catty waves her paws.

"So many! Enough to fill a dumpster!"

"The mega value pack should cover us."

I give Bratty a thumbs up and leave their shady establishment. Now I enter the main building and this time I'm greeted by someone for once. It's either very diamond-like or very origami-like, but above all, it's a tiny monster.

"Welcome to MTT Resort - Hotland's biggest apartment-building-turned-hotel! Whether you're here for a night or still live here, MTT Resort prides itself on a great stay! Just passing through...? Nice! MTT Resort prides itself on being passed through!"

"Interesting business model. Does it work?"

"Oh, indeed it does, human."

"You know what I am?"

"Oh yes! The staff has been informed of your coming and instructed on how to handle you upon arrival."

Oh god, what now?

"Over on your left, we have a dine-in restaurant complete with a stage which hosts a wide cast of live acts. Either comedy done by locals or Mettaton entertains when he isn't too busy."

"Neat."

"If you're feeling like you hate yourself, behind me is the MTT-Brand Burger Emporium, home of the Dazzleburger!"

Well, they know how fast food works.

"All further questions can be taken to my coworker behind the desk."

I scratch my head and shrug.

"Thanks."

I walk away and head for the other receptionist. It's not a bad-looking lobby at least. Red & yellow checkered tiles and the rug from outside continues forward into parts unknown. The obnoxious fountain of Mettaton is gaudy though. I reach the desk and the monster behind it is a weird one. It's blue and its head is a hand with very well manicured red nails.

"Yes, we know. The elevator music volume is super loud and the song is stuck on a three-second loop. We are working on it. Because of this incident, rooms are running at a special rate! 200G a room. Interested?"

Someone sounds grumpy.

"No thank you. I was told to come to you. I'm the human if that helps."

Their head fingers extend in alert.

"Oh! Sorry. I was instructed to inform you on where to go next."

"That would be helpful, yes."

It motions to where the rug is heading.

"If you follow the rug there, you'll be lead out back to the entrance of the CORE. Mettaton will be waiting for you at the top."

"Could I use the elevator instead? All this travel is exhausting."

"No can do. The elevator leads to the Capital and main residence of our people. You're not allowed to go there."

"Oh...That's fine. I didn't want to go there. Just trying to take shortcuts if able."

"*ahem* If you require a small rest, might I suggest renting a room?"

"I don't the gold, sorry."

"That's fine. Mettaton has pre-paid a room for you. One time only."

I'm stunned. Damn him! Why does he confuse me so much?! I want to like and hate him at the same time!

"Um...In that case, sure. Where are rooms?"

They motion again.

"Down the hall to the right."

I wait for them to give me a key or card but nothing is there except awkwardness.

"Is there a problem?"

"No...not really. But...uh...Isn't this the part you give me a room key?"

"What? Room...Key? No, we don't do that. If you leave your room, you'll have to pay again."

So if I enter I can't leave or else I'll have to pay? That's insane!

"On second thought, maybe later."

"Shame. Do let us know if you change your mind. Have a sparkular day!"

I'm getting the feeling they're being nice because they were told to be. Otherwise, I doubt I'd be given such a warm welcome. Oh well. Time to pay a certain someone a visit.

I stroll up to the emporium and find myself paused. I can go about this in many ways. The different choices and outcomes play out in my head super fast. After a few, I settle on something...something that'll leave an impression. I push the doors open. A digital bell sounds. I look at what appears to be a sadder version of McDonald's. And like a mindless corporate drone, he speaks while moping the floor before seeing "who" just walked in.

"Welcome to MTT-Brand Burger Emporium, home of the Dazzleburger. Sparkle up your day (TM)."

He begins to turn around.

"What can I do to..."

His eyes widen seeing me, grinning sadistically at him like a lunatic.

"Uh...help?"

This hurts my throat to do, but it really sells this whole thing. I deepen my voice to imitate Dr. Claw from Inspector Gadget and just laugh. He is unnerved to say the least.

"*menacing* No one will help you."

"H-Hey now...Don't think of doing anything funny."

I walk up to him and he backs away slowly before leaping behind the counter.

"Stay back! You can't hurt anyone in shops!"

I keep the deep voice.

"*menacing* Hurt you? Foolish boy...Why would I do that? It's not like you put a cigarette out on my wrist and bashed my head with a bat!"

That last part was done a bit too harsh and I end coughing. All seriousness leaves.

"*coughs* Nah, man...*normal* I ain't gonna do anything. For reals. I was just messing with ya."

He eyes me funny.

"Riiiiiight...What do you want then?"

"Preferably, my phone."

He flinches, his eyes looking quickly down then darting back up.

"I..."

"Metta doesn't have to know."

"What do you mean he won't know?! He knows everything that goes on here!"

"Look, you either give me my phone, or I'm gonna go back there and take it."

"You're not seri..."

My dead stare shuts him up. He seems to freeze up now. I sneer and put my hand out. He looks at my hand and then starts sweating. I'm beginning to lose my patience.

"You have five seconds."

His fur stands on end and he suddenly slams his face on the countertop, giving himself a bloody nose.

"Sorry, (Ha ha) it's against the rules to talk to customers who haven't bought anything. And talking with you this long has put me in serious shit. If you want this 'exchange' to continue, you're going to make a purchase."

I'm not happy.

"...What do you have?"

[60G - Sorebet - Very popular food.]

[120G - Dazzleburger - Very popular food.]

[300G - Mythical Villain - Anti-Hero Sandwich. ATTACK UP in battle.]

[500G - Biltong Slab designed to look like Mettaton - Don't ask. Please.]

I huff through my nose and shell out the 60G.

"That Sorebet better come with my phone."

"Yeah yeah. Don't get your panties in a twist."

"Fuck you. I wear boxers."

He eyes me with a blush before heading into the back. Might as well chat him up while I can.

"So...Do you know the chicks behind the building?"

"Huh? Oh...Them. Yeah, I know them. What of it?"

"They were talking about you."

"The girls were...Talking about me...?"

Hooked him.

"They mentioned you threw burgers at them and ran."

"Bullshit! That is not what happened."

He comes back to the counter with a glass of frozen dessert and my phone.

"Care to enlighten me?"

He sighs and lights a cigarette. I wonder if he can do that while on shift?

"Never interact with attractive people. Unless you're 'one of them', they're just gonna take advantage of you. Those two chicks asked me to sneak them some Dazzleburgers. And I, the naive teenager that I was, said yes to them. Bad idea."

"What happened?"

He takes a dag and lifts the collar of his uniform shirt open, blowing the smoke in there.

"Does that really keep the smoke from spreading?"

"It's worked so far. *puff* So I went out to the alley to see those two ladies, and uh...you know, see what'd happen next."

"Like...Naughty stuff?"

"...Maybe."

"Nice."

He blushes.

"Anyway...Then my boss comes out of nowhere, sees me, and demands to know what I was doing. I was so startled, the hamburgers in my pockets tumbled out onto the ground. Not wanting to lose face to the girls, I scrambled to pick them up! But, as I was bending down, the weight of the remaining hamburgers...*puff*...caused my pants to fall down."

He expected me to mock him. But I can't feel anything more than pity for the guy. This surprises him and he continues his story.

"Then the girls laughed at me. Everyone calls me Burgerpants now. It's gotten to the point I can't remember my name half of the time. It's even on my name tag for fuck's sake!"

Poor douche cat.

"I think you're the first to not laugh at me or that story."

"Why would I laugh? That's...That's messed up, man."

He takes another drag.

"You know something...I misjudged you, human. I know it ain't much, but, I'm sorry for being an ass."

I rub the back of my head.

"I'll be honest, guy...Since the bar thing, I've seen you only as a prick. The idea of you having hard times and lashing out didn't cross my mind at all. That's my bad right there. Sorry on my part for being a bitch."

He smirks.

"So...You're really not going to tell Mettaton about this?"

He hands me my phone.

"Dude, this stays between us. Besides, he's kinda been pissing me off lately."

"Yeah, he does that."

He takes a deep drag before putting the cigarette out on the bottom of his shoe.

"Can I give you some advice? I'm getting on in years, so take it from me...You've still got time. Don't live like me. I'm 19 years old and I've already wasted my entire life. I'll probably be trapped at this stupid job forever. But wait! There's one thing that keeps me going! If ASGORE gets just one more SOUL, we'll finally get to go to the surface! It'll be a brand new world! There's gotta be a second chance out there for me! For everyone!"

"Maybe. So, what did you want to do before this?"

"Oh...I wanted to be an ACTOR."

"Neat."

"When I first came to Hotland, it was my dream to work with Mettaton. Well, be careful what you wish for! God, look what that idiot has done here. This place is a labyrinth of bad choices. And every time we try to change something for the better, he vetoes it and says that's not how they do it on the surface. Oh! Right! Humans are always eating hamburgers made of RHINESTONES AND GLITTER."

"...I can assure you we don't eat that. Eating that would be very bad for our health. Maybe even fatal. Monsters don't really eat that...Do they?"

His eyes shift and I facepalm.

"And you guys think I'm gonna hurt ya?"

"You should probably get going. The boss will get his gears in a bunch if you take too long getting to the CORE."

"Fine."

I put the Sorebet in my inventory and remember my awkward side-quest.

"Oh! Before I bounce, can you help me with something?"

He tilts his head.

"What?"

"The chicks, Bratty and Catty, they have items I want but don't have the crazy amount of gold. They say they'll trade for a mega value pack. Any way you might be able to help make this trade happen?"

He sighs.

"Really? Do you know how much that is?"

"1300G close? Because that's how much I need."

"...What kind of shit are they selling that's worth that much?!"

I goofily shrug. He groans and rubs his face.

"I can't just give you that much for free."

"Catty thinks your cute."

"...For real?"

I nod. He fidgets, fingers tip-tapping and pitter-pattering.

"Okay, I'll tell you what...You score me a hook up with her and I'll give you the burgers."

Damn you rule of three in side-quests!

"Argh...I guess I can try. It won't be the weirdest thing I do today but it is on the list though."

His eyes light up with excitement. I can't mess this up now. How often does he actually smile like this?

"Thank you! *ahem* I mean...Cool."

I slink out of the emporium and head for the exit.

"Um, excuse me, human...The CORE is the other way."

I groan.

"I know. I'll be back."

Exit building, go into the creepy alley, and meet the girls again.

"Look who's back."

"Do you have the Dazzleburgers?"

I show my empty hands.

"Ha! I knew she'd blow it."

"Sucks to be you!"

"Hold up. He'll give me the goods. But..."

"But...?"

"Catty...Do you really think he's cute? 'Cause he thinks you're hot."

Catty's face flushes. Bratty rolls her eyes.

"For reals? He wants a date?"

"A date? A hangout? A simple meeting while he's working? I don't know. For all I know she can walk in, say hi, and that's it. All I need is confirmation and you get all those shiny burgers."

"Yes!"

"Catty...?"

"What a deal! A cute guy and free food! It's the score of a lifetime!"

"Catty, he's a loser. You hang out with him once, then he wants to hang out... All. The. Time."

"But don't you feel bad for him, Bratty? Poor Burgerpants...Think about how cool we are compared to him!!! We'd be saving his LIFE with our awesomeness!! His LIFE, Bratty!!"

"Uh, so?"

"Think of all the Dazzleburgers he could get for us!!"

And just like that, I feel like shit for doing this.

"...So is he free after work?"

"*huff* I'll be back...again."

Leave the alley, enter the building, meet up with Burgerpants.

"I don't like the look you have there. Did she say no?"

I can't lie to this guy.

"Dude, I'm really uncomfortable with this."

"What's wrong?"

"She said yes. But..."

"She said YES?!"

"I mean, she agreed, but please listen..."

"Ha! Ahahaha!! Yes!!! You've brought a tear to the eye of this old man."

I feel so bad.

"Dude, please...I'm, like, 100% sure she's gonna use you for free food and maybe gold."

"...So?"

I'm taken back.

"Look, you don't think I didn't think of that? I know she's probably going to use me. Everyone does. If it's for the food, I don't care. That's just another way I can stick it to my boss. Speaking of..."

He plops this cardboard case down on the counter.

"A deal's a deal. The mega value pack for the girl."

...Okay, they're made for each other. Everyone here is trash!

"So, uh, what time did she say she wanted to hang out?"

I hate everything about this!!

"I'll be back again."

Take food, leave, exit, alley. At this point, I nearly shove the shit at them.

"Oh my God!"

"Is that the mega value pack Dazzleburgers?"

"OH MY GOD!!! GIMME!!!"

"God, Catty. Try to have some self-control."

"Sorry..."

"'Cause they OBVIOUSLY brought the Dazzleburgers for ME."

"NO WAYYY!!!!!"

I point to the items.

"Trade. Now."

Bratty puts the key and gun into the hat before handing it over to me.

"Thank you."

I put the key in my inventory and equip the other two.

[You equipped the Tattered Western Hat]

[You gain 12 Defense and 5 Attack]

[This battle-worn hat makes you want to crew on straw for some reason. It also raises attack by 5.]

[You equipped the Rusty Revolver]

[You gain 12 Attack]

[An super old gun. It has no ammo. Must be used precisely, or damage will be low. Duh.]

[HP: 40 ATK: 62 DEF: 50]

I am becoming OP!!

"Oh! Give burger-boy this!"

Catty hands me a scrap of paper with her number.

"Fine. I'm just glad this is done."

Back to Burgerpants. I slap the paper down.

"Here's her number. I hope you don't regret this."

His face contorts in a weird way...Is he...Happy?

Sweet! I need to pick a spicy outfit for my little shindig later. Though, now that I think about it, I had to throw away all of my clothes to make room for the outfits Mettaton gave me."

"...What?"

"Don't take it the wrong way. They're just all these...Weird getups. 'Promotional' costumes. For 'holidays'. Or 'specials'. Or 'because he felt like it'. The thing IS though! Most of the time I'm the only employee who has to wear this stuff! Sometimes he even calls me into his office just to...Make me put something on...Then he laughs and lets me go back to work as normal."

My pity meter is breaking.

"Anyways, I won't sweat it. I'll take it casual. NEVER let hot people think you care. That's how they GET you."

And the pity meter dropped dead.

"Good luck with that."

I leave on that note. Fuck this resort. Fuck this quest plot. Fuck this whole damn thing!

Wanting this shit show to be over and done with, I do as instructed by following the rug's path out some doors that have a giant sign above that says "CORE". Lazy-ass designers, I swear.

Weirdly this leads to a balcony. A balcony that has been opened and a walkway built that connects to the massive facility. The light from the resort barely shows half of the path as the CORE itself surprisingly gives off the faintest glow. The CORE is an entirely mechanical complex that is largely black and yellow with red accents. The blah colors aside, what gets my attention are the two monsters that were minding the entrance that slip inside when I show up. I don't like this.

"Flowey, you better be able to get here. I have a bad feeling about this."

Approaching shows more of this crazy thing. The CORE appears to be the most industrial and modern region of the Underground. Ozone, a byproduct of electrical power, is omnipresent below the floor level of the CORE. This could mean the CORE might be made of stainless steel, titanium, or platinum; as ozone is highly corrosive to most organic materials. If this is the case, they could use this stuff. The CORE could be a source of ozonated water, which cleans clothes, sanitizes food, and purifies drinking water. This also implies this might be the greatest source of oxygen in the Underground as ozone simply decomposes into oxygen at high concentrations and temperatures. The only hazard I can think of is that oxygen is a shitty thing to breathe. Breathing pure oxygen at high pressures can cause nausea, dizziness, muscle twitching, vision loss, convulsions, and loss of consciousness. Breathing pure oxygen for a long time can irritate the lungs causing coughing and/or shortness of breath. Higher exposure may cause a build-up of fluid in the lungs and subsequent death. Guess how much more O2 is needed to do this to a person? 20% more. God, Humans are so freaking weak. I'll need to be careful here.

The lobby of the CORE has an elevator to the north and two paths to the left and right. Not a bad looking place, very lavishly decorated, the floors are engraved with intricate patterns and multicolored neon tubes serve as wall ornaments and embellishments. I check the elevator, which is disabled, I'm not shocked at this point. Not much else to do, I go to the path on the right, which turns out to be a small room with a square platform overlooking a pit of fire. Not bad. I do enjoy looking at fire. It's pretty. Moving on! Going through the left path leads to a rectangular stretch of wall-less hallway with a doorway at the end.

"Hmmm...My bullshit senses are tingling. I'm willing to bet a random encounter/ambush is about to happen."

As if cued by my words, something cracks the back of my head and then hits my gut as I turn.

"*wheeze* Called it..."

My attacker appears and my dull cracked purple soul is forced out to play.

[Madjick pops out of its hat!]

Madjick has a typical appearance of a wizard. It wears a curved wizard hat, a pair of boots, and two rotating orbs emitting cross-shaped particles. Madjick has a sly smile on its face, but a pair of bright eyes are hidden just under its hat.

[FIGHT]

[ACT]

[̴͝SP͜͞E͡L̵͜L͟͠͏]͘͢

[ITEM]

[MERCY]

I wonder if SPELL will work on this thing? ...N-No. No. Can't chance it. Stick to normal tactics.

[ACT selected.]

[New options available.]

[CHECK]

[TALK]

[STARE]

[CLEAR MIND]

...The fuck kind of options are these?!

[CHECK selected.]

[MADJICK – HP: 190 ATK: 29 DEF: 24 – This enemy can only speak in magic words.]

Finally! My states aren't shit compared to my attacker. Also, only speaks in magic words is the most fucking adorable thing I've ever heard.

"Abra cadabra."

An orb spawns off to my left and rapid-fires crosses at me. I dodge and the orb tries to cut me off by going where I'm headed. It fires about eight times and moving around is not so great.

[HP ████████████████ 16/40]

Thank goodness my defense got increased during all this crap. I could've been really messed up.

[Madjick flaunts its orbs in a menacing manner.]

It snickers.

"A smug one. I like that."

[TALK selected.]

"You know...I can do magic too."

It looks at me intrigued.

"Yep. I can make your smile disappear."

It pauses before sneering at me.

"See? I made it vanish before your very eyes!"

It didn't seem to like my humor.

"Hocus pocus."

[Madjick begins chattering to itself. Its gibberish dizzies you...Your DEFENSE drops by 1.]

My head feels fuzzy. Did it just jinx me? Are there more types of magic than what I've been told?

One of the orbs begins to chase me while deploying harmful but immobile crosses. Yet due to the jinx, my sense of direction is ass-backward. Left is right and right is left. Up is down and down is up. However...much to Madjick's dismay...I'm used to being incredibly dizzy. My childhood was filled with countless hours of boredom appeased by spinning around till I couldn't see straight.

[HP ████████████████████ 20/40]

Ha ha...Suck on those magic balls, wizard-boy!

"*slur* Is that what you call magic? Boo! Disappointed!"

[Madjick whispers arcane swear words.]

"*slur* Oh...Someone needs to put some gold in the swear jar. I'm gonna tattle!"

It growls.

"Eh eh eh. It's not your turn."

I slap my face a few times.

[CLEAR MIND selected.]

"I wonder where Flowey is?"

[You think of pollen and sunshine. Your confusion abates. Your DEFENSE increased by 2.]

"...What?"

"Alakazam!!"

It tries to surprise me with that following orb trick. But now that I know that move it's not so bad.

[HP ██████████████████████████ 26/40]

Huh? Am I auto-healing faster? Sweet! Surely that only means good things for me.

[Madjick peers at you with strange eyes.]

"What? You scared? My sick moves and auto-healing too much for you? No worries, wizard-dude, we cool. I got you."

The hell did I just say? Am I magic high? Fuck it.

[MERCY selected.]

[New options available.]

[FLEE]

[SPARE]

[SPARE selected.]

It looks at me funny. Then it looks at my HP.

[HP ████████████████████████████████ 32/40]

It flinches.

"Please and thank you."

Madjick accepts my act of mercy.

[YOU WON!]

[You earned 0 XP and 120 gold.]

The fight ends, my soul returns to my body and I give my opponent claps of approval.

"Good show, buddy. Keep up the good work."

It seems confused but nods, hovering away behind me towards the exit.

"Well...That was weird."

My head still feels odd. Nothing a few brain sloshing shakes of the old noggin won't fix. Anyway, no time to question strange feelings or whatever. I gotta get through this so I can get back to Toriel. Onwards I go.

Continuing forward, I enter a room with a bridge that is cut off by a tesla coil. Wow. Hadn't seen that in a long ass time. How much do I wanna bet there's a convenient off switch nearby. Oh, look! A super obvious switch right there on the wall. Who could've ever had guessed! I flip the switch and lasers fire at me! First blue, then blue again, and orange. Thankfully they're slow, so once I triggered the first blue laser I easily hit the deck to avoid the others that pass by.

"Setting booby traps on top of other traps now. Geez, Metta, I'm starting to think you don't like me very much. Well, that's fine. I don't like me either! So come at me already and quit this pussy bullshit!"

Calm down. No need to get riled up. Get through this and go home. Then I can just stuff my face with Nanny's awesome cheesecake and pass out happy. I march on, doing my best not to look down or notice how some of the walls and floors are chipped away. Now I'm paranoid about if any other laser that turns up is functional or decorative.

The path leads into a crossroads with a path to my left and a path straight ahead. My bullshit sense is tingling when I look at the left path. Straight ahead it is.

This room contains a bridge with many blue and orange lasers followed by a massive wall of blue lasers.

"Nope. Just nope. Screw the rules! I have plot armor importance and common sense!"

Fuck this outfit. Fuck this shit! I have lost all my fucks! I get down on the floor and combat crawl the long as fuck cold metal catwalk.

"*muttering* Stupid bullshit. Why do I have to be nice? If I wasn't nice, I wouldn't have to put up with shit like this. Bitches don't end up in laser catwalk traps. But no...I have to be a decent person. *getting louder* I have to be a good girl. I have to not give in to the overwhelming urge to punch assholes for being assholes because that's wrong for dumb reasons! *shouting* Why am I pissing myself off?! This is extremely counterproductive given my current situation! Fuck!!"

I blame all this on Mettaton. That's a healthy way to look at it. Probably not. But I'm not a mental health doctor! The fuck do I know?! After crossing the bridge, I storm grumpily along another walkway only to reach something called "Core Branch".

Turns out the "Core Branch" is a four-way intersection. Fan-fucking-tastic. Man, my mood is fucking sour. Maybe the digital sign can be useful and give me directions.

[North, the warrior's path. West, the sage's path. Any path leads to The End.]

"*growling* This is so...FUCKING STUPID!!"

Nope. Not falling for anymore of this. I choose neither side and go straight. This middle path of the "Core Branch" has me entering a vertical room with a right path leading to the eastern portion of the "Core Branch". There's nothing to my left. It just drops into the ozone, so it's certain death. I'm so sure this place followed all safety measures. There is a sign on the wall that is telling me to "Get lost...And stay that way".

"Wha...Why have signs telling me to leave when you told me to come here?! Stupid metal moron giving me dumb mixed messages."

I hate everything. No monster better encounter me while I'm in this mood. I take out a gold piece and flip it. Heads for straight and tails for the right. It lands on tails so right I go. This has to be the stupidest designed building ever! What the hell was Gaster thinking?! Was he on the drugs? Because this seems like he was on the drugs! 'Cause now I'm at another four-way crossroads. Only now I have two digital signs.

[To the East! This is The End.]

[I cannot fight. I cannot think. But, with patience, I will make my way through.]

A third, and hopefully final, tesla coil blocks what has been established as the exit. This means there's a switch somewhere. F that shit. Know what? You know what'll piss everyone off? I'm gonna do what that sign said. I'm going to be patient. Because if I know Mettaton, and I know massive egos very well, he won't want boring content to be televised and eventually spice things up. I plop my edgy tush under the sign and...wait. Using this time to chill. Let this negativity go and...

*Clank-clank-clank*

Oh hell no!

A large monster ominously approaches. Knight Knight is a monster that wields a great staff with a sun symbol in her right hand. She wears a suit of black armor and what resembles a horned helmet with a crescent moon emblazoned on her forehead. The helmet's eyepiece occasionally widens and un-widens as if it is her mouth. Her torso is dominated by a dragon face whose beak occasionally opens and closes, revealing a small eye. It is unclear whether which face is the true face.

"Let me guess...You're here to make me move?"

"Yes."

"No."

She's confused.

"...No?"

"Did I stutter? I'm not moving."

She readies her spear.

"Then prepare for..."

"Let me stop you right there. I get that you're doing your job and following the law, and blah blah blee bloo, whatever. I have been through one of THE worst days in my life. My mind, soul, and charitable goodwill have been pushed to limits that are very VERY thin now. I am in no mood to deal with any more crap. So I'm going to say this once because I ain't fighting you or moving from this spot till this electrical blockaded is gone...Turn around and go home."

She doesn't take me seriously and laughs.

"Heh heh...You have no power to give me orders, human."

She takes a step closer and I snap.

"I͏͟ ̧̀̕W͝IL͘͡L̴ ̶Ŗ͟͜I͝҉P͘ ̵O͜F̧F̛͞ ̸̀Y̧͡O̡͢U̡͠R ͠H̸EA̶͏D͏͢ ̸̕A͜N͢D S̢̛͜Ḩ̶Į͢T̵̕ ͝D̶̀OW͞N̷̴͠ ҉͞Ý̸̢O̡͡U̡͢R ̸ŅE̴͝CḰ̡̧!͞͞!̧͢"

She stumbles back in shock. The strange energy sparks off me. I regret everything.

"I̵'͘͟͏ḿ͢͞ ̧̕͞so̧̨͡r̴̢ŗ̷͜y̧.̵̛.̢͞.̛p̢l͝ea̷se͢.͟.́͢.leave me. I'm so sorry."

I seem to have disturbed her. She slowly steps back and turns around when she's convinced I'm not going to move.

"Adieu...Human."

She leaves me and I let out a shaky exhale. It's getting worse. I'm losing control. I can't do this for much longer. I haven't been given any proper time to deal with this shit. My internal bottle has been shaken too much! It's going to explode! I...I...

"What the heck was that?!"

Flowey pops up beside me and I'm too freaked out to be startled.

"Sis? What's wrong?"

I hold myself in an attempt to squeeze into a tiny ball of self-loathing. This only worries him more.

"Lynsie?"

I...I can't...I need a break. If only I had my music. I could drown out all this. Lose myself in the lyrics.

"B-Bro..."

"Yes? Talk to me. I can help. Tell me what you need."

"...H-How fast can you get to Snowdin?"

He frowns.

"You want me to get 'him', don't you?"

All I can do is nod.

"I...I can help too. You don't have to turn to him."

My eyes dart to the blocked path. He puts things together. He is a smart boy after all.

"True. Mettaton is that way and the room his encounter takes place in is an elevating platform. I can stretch from my roots pretty far but not THAT far."

He pouts.

"*huff* I guess there's no other option. He does have experience helping you out when things get bad. And he can teleport."

I feel bad that I'm making him do this...again. Like in the dead timeline.

"I...I'm sorry."

"Wha...N-No! Don't apologize. I understand. You're worried. It's okay. We'll get through this. Family helps family. What kind of big brother would I be if I didn't do everything to help? Even if that means getting others to help when I can't."

"...I need a hug...please?"

It pains me to see him hesitate. But vines come out to wrap around me for a bit.

"Thank you."

The vines retract and he extends to nuzzle my cheek.

"It won't be like last time. I promise. You won't kill anyone. No one's going to die."

"H-How do you know?"

"Because you're strong. You just have to believe in yourself. I know I do."

...I needed that. I give him a smile.

"There we go. There's my sis. Now keep that smile. I'll get Smiley Trashbag and we'll be back home with mom in no time."

He really is too sweet for this world. He sinks into the floor and I forgot to ask how he was able to get through this floor. I mean, I guess he said he can get through cement so metal can't be too far of a long shot. Asriel sure is a super strong boy even as a flower.

*BUZZ*

The power to the coil suddenly is shut off remotely like I so knew it could be. Damn it. I was hoping to have more time. How impatient is Mettaton for this? Reluctantly, I get up and walk down this new road. Halfway along this bridge, I am blocked by three vaguely familiar monsters that look like tougher versions of monsters I see in the Ruins.

Final Froggit has spike-like protrusions on its head and eyelids, accompanied by a crown-like muff on top of its head. Its lips are marked with lines, as though wrinkled from age. Its "shoulders" are decorated with sharp excrescents, while the silhouette between its legs forms a face with a triangular smile and cross eyes.

Whimsalot has a more human-like appearance than Whimsun. Also, its antennae are thicker, and there is a muff on their head that branches in two. Whimsalot's appearance is also accompanied by a double-bladed spear and a knight mask. Its ghost-like torso is skinnier and shorter.

Astigmatism's body consists of a large ball and four spiked limbs. The ball is accompanied by two "horns" on each side. When idle, a large eye can be seen on the ball also with three eyelashes. However, it changes from this face to another where the eye hollow is changed with a smile. When having its eye closed, the two side eyelashes become Astigmatism's eyes, while the middle one simply becomes a marking.

I don't know what I must look like to them. Probably dreadful. Because they move aside with not a word being side. I nod in thanks, proceeding to the end which for all I know might be the most tragic moment of my life second to Grillby dying. No! Stop it! Do as Flowey said. Smile. Stay chipper. Think of something silly. Like how dumb this place is. Honestly, was Gaster high making this place? I'll have to ask him later. Nah...I'll ask Sans. Less hassle.

The bridge comes to an end, leading to a shadowy doorway and an elevator that probably would've been super handy but was out of order to pad out the length of this bullshit subplot. Augh...It's so much easier to think my life is a fictional story or internet abridge series. It's the only way my brain allows most of this crap to make any sense.

"So this is it, huh? The epic conclusion of this grand show. Heh...I want to feel accomplished for making it this far. Almost. But all I do feel is..."

I can't finish my sentence. The weight I thought I got off my back earlier begins pressing on me again.

"Nothing...I feel nothing. *sniffling* Damn it...Don't fucking cry!"

With a breakdown seconds away from happening, I enter the doorway to the room of darkness and a door shuts behind me then locks. There is no going back now.

Please...I made a promise...Please...Don't make me have to RESET...Please...I'm begging...Please...

#undertale #underfell #Anomaly #Lynsie #sans #papyrus #gaster #grillby #grandpa semi #flowey #Asriel #toriel #asgore #frisk #chara #undyne #mettaton #napstablook #alphys

[violent-optimism]

Rey as a Palpatine and Why it’s Grown on Me

Hello my lovelies!

I think it’s been quite a while since I posted any kind of essay on here. Between work and other things I honestly haven’t had much time for it. However in recent days I’ve felt very motivated to work on a very particular kind of essay; a subject that I’ve been stewing over since December of last year.

Obviously from the title you already know what I’m going to be talking about. I’m not going to deny that this is a rather heated subject for some Star Wars fans, particularly those who disliked this plot choice and The Rise of Skywalker in general. As per usual in my essays, my goal is not to change anyone’s mind or argue over who’s opinion is “more right”. Plain and simple, this is just going to be me talking about MY thoughts and MY observations about Rey’s journey and lineage in The Rise of Skywalker. I hope this doesn’t need to be said but if you read something in this essay that you disagree with, I politely ask that you keep it to yourself and move on. At the end of the day, we are just talking about a movie, and this is all just for fun.

Now, with that being said, let’s get started! This essay is definitely going to be a bit more structured than my usual efforts and I hope this will result in a much more straightforward and clear-cut essay. Enjoy!

 1.      My Initial Reaction

 While I don’t want this to be a major part of the essay, I do think it makes sense to start this off with a little story about the time I first saw TROS in the theatre. I can remember it pretty well. My whole body was tense, my eyes glued to the screen for what I knew was about to be some kind of major reveal in the story (even if it felt very late in the film for such a scene). Then came those shocking and irreversible words from Kylo Ren: “You’re his Granddaughter. You are a Palpatine.”

Wait…what?

My mind recoiled at this statement. My heart sank into my stomach with complete rejection. This can’t be right. He must be lying. I don’t like it. I don’t like it one bit. A man behind me just snorted with laughter and I can totally see why. Rey being related to Palpatine sounds more like a crazy Youtube fan theory than something that could actually be canon in the Star Wars universe. We had always thought she might be related to Luke or even Obi-Wan, but…Emperor Palpatine? Darth Sidious? No, just no.

So yeah, suffice to say that my first reaction towards this plot twist was not very positive. I admit that even once the movie was over, I still didn’t like this reveal. I don’t even think I began to warm up to it until my 3rd or 4th viewing of TROS. I had become so used to the idea that Rey had no special lineage and she was just a very force-sensitive girl from nowhere that it was extremely hard to let go of that. And honestly, if JJ and everyone else involved had chosen to keep it that way, I would have been perfectly content. So why…you might ask, has Rey’s true lineage grown on me in the last several months?

Now, don’t get me wrong…there’s still a part of me that thinks it was a very odd choice to introduce a reveal like this considering what happened in the previous installment. However…this fact has already been discussed to death and this essay is intended to be more of a story exploration rather than a critical film review. So let’s talk more about Rey being Palpatine’s Granddaughter and how I have actually grown to love the idea.

 2.      Rey’s Journey

 Throughout the trilogy, Rey has had to overcome quite a few challenges in her path to becoming a Jedi. Her journey has been one of mostly self-discovery and personal growth. In The Force Awakens, Rey discovers that she is strong in the force and can do things she never imagined. In The Last Jedi, Rey’s strength in the force grows stronger and she learns to accept that her parents were nobodies and that some things do not turn out the way we expect.

And so, thematically, it would almost seem like Rey has reached the end of her character arc. This is Rey at her most powerful. There’s nothing left to learn, and there are no more secrets to be revealed…right? Well, we know that this is not the case. Even from the first scene with Rey we know that something is wrong. She knows that something is wrong. There is a darkness inside of her; she fears for her destiny and who she is meant to become. It’s not until later that we understand why these feelings have come to the surface.

Up until TROS, we didn’t truly know who Rey was or where she came from. However, by this point in the story anyone should be able to describe her as a character. Kind. Brave. Resourceful. Curious. Compassionate. Strong. Rey has proven time and time again that she is an incredibly kind and capable individual who wants to do the right thing. Although both TLJ and TROS strongly hint towards Rey possibly turning to the dark side, we know that our protagonist never actually would because we know who Rey is.

And this a huge reason as to why the Rey Palpatine reveal works so well for me. There is an incredible juxtaposition with Rey being the most heroic, kind-hearted person imaginable, and yet she is related to the most evil man in the galaxy. There is something deeply profound about the last living Jedi having Sith blood in her veins. Part of the reason why this reveal is so shocking is because the two characters are complete polar opposites in terms of good and evil. Rey is absolutely nothing like Palpatine and so the familial connection seems impossible. It doesn’t just seem like an unlikely truth, it feels entirely incorrect. And yet, that is also what makes it (again, in my opinion) so interesting and bold.

 3.      Meaning and Impact

 Apart from giving Rey one last emotional challenge in the final installment, I think this choice was made for other reasons as well (3 to be precise).

1.      It made Rey even more similar to Kylo as he too is grappling with the dark influence from his Grandfather

2.      This decision subverts a long-existing trope in fantasy stories

3.      Used to further tie the 9 films together as a story about the Skywalker and Palpatine bloodlines

Since The Force Awakens, it was made very clear early on that Rey and Kylo were connected in some way; their destinies were intertwined. Although this was further explored in TLJ, we would not truly understand just how similar their journeys would become until the final installment. The dynamic between Rey and Kylo is infinitely interesting because at first glance they seem like completely opposite people, when in reality they share a very similar struggle, especially in The Rise of Skywalker.

Both Rey and Kylo experience the overwhelming darkness of their respective families. Kylo even says it quite bluntly before the lightsaber duel on the ruined Death Star: “The dark side is in our nature, surrender to it.” He is quite obviously trying to use Rey’s lineage against her in an attempt to turn her over to his side. What makes this so interesting is that we know Kylo himself is not yet completely taken over by the dark side. Despite his evil deeds, he has always been conflicted during this story.

When Rey finds out that she is related to Emperor Palpatine, she becomes withdrawn, angry, afraid and unstable. This is the closest to the dark side that we have ever seen Rey at. Indeed there are some moments where she almost seems to be channeling behaviour that would be more suited for Kylo (snapping at her friends, using anger as power). Although Rey eventually comes to her senses and realizes what is happening to her, she was clearly affected by her Grandfather’s dark influence, just as Kylo was.

 Despite the fact that both Rey and Kylo come from families with a history of the dark side, the film makes it very clear that one character’s lineage is far “worse” than the other. This is where the subversion of a common fantasy trope takes place. Now, to be clear, this is only my interpretation and I don’t claim this to be exactly what the filmmakers were going for; however this subversion is yet another reason why I enjoy the Rey Palpatine reveal.

How many times have you watched a movie or a TV show where a character’s lineage was a significant part of the story? It’s probably more times than you can count on one hand, right? My point is that the idea of a character’s lineage/family history becoming a main plot element in a story is nothing new, we’ve seen this before a million times. For example, in Disney’s “Tangled” (2010) Rapunzel learns that she is the long lost princess who was taken away from her family when she was an infant. Disney influence aside, does this sound somewhat similar to Rey’s story? Yes, it absolutely does…but not in the traditional or conventional sense.

This is where Rey Palpatine (for me at least), becomes extremely appealing. This reveal is like the evil, twisted version of a heroine discovering that she is the secret heir to a royal family. And instead of the protagonist being overjoyed and enlightened by this information, the reveal comes with great personal shock and emotional turmoil. In this case, Rey is the Granddaughter of Emperor Palpatine, which essentially makes her Sith royalty if we’re being really comparable. Am I the only one who (for lack of better words) thinks this is insanely cool? Not only is it a direct subversion of a very common story trope, it directly ties into Kylo’s arc and it also parallels Luke’s family revelation in “The Empire Strikes Back.” Coincidentally, this also makes Rey’s journey similar to Luke’s in that regard, but I’ll get back to that later.

Now as you’ve probably heard before, as we look back on all 9 films in the Star Wars saga we can see that this is clearly a story about the Skywalker and Palpatine families. Granted, the Palpatine bloodline is largely unexplored in comparison to the former. We know that Rey’s Father was the son of the Emperor, but we still don’t know his name or who he really was. Ultimately this information is not relevant to the story as a whole, but it’s clear that Emperor Palpatine has been pulling the strings throughout basically the entire saga.

More specifically, Palpatine himself has always been tied to the Skywalkers. He seduced Anakin Skywalker to the dark side and later tried to do the same to Luke. Via Snoke he was also able to turn Ben Solo, who shares a dyad with Rey, Palpatine’s Granddaughter. It kind of comes full circle and it’s really quite clever in my opinion. The Villain of the ST is related to the Heroes of the OT, and the Hero of the ST is related to the Villain of the OT (Did I just blow your mind?).

Put simply, Rey being a Palpatine makes a lot more sense thematically when you examine the story that came before her. Families are complicated and messy, especially in Star Wars. Rey’s experience echoes this, but in a much darker and harsher way. Her journey is meant to resemble Luke Skywalker’s in many ways, but their stories do have differences. In Luke’s case, he actually got to see and interact with Anakin, the real face of who his Father was. Anakin Skywalker was certainly not a perfect person, but in his last moments he turned to the light and saved his son’s life.

Rey, of course, did not get to experience a moment even close to this. Palpatine is about as evil as evil gets. There is no hope or chance of redemption. She was forced to look upon her own flesh and blood and see nothing but a monster. It would be unfair to turn this into a competition of “who had the most devastating family reveal”, but the point I’m trying to make is that Rey and Luke’s journeys are undeniably similar, which serves to further strengthen the connection of Skywalker and Palpatine in these 9 films.

 4.      Conclusion: The Power of Choice

 I feel I must end on the note of choice, because this is how The Rise of Skywalker chooses to end. Despite everything I have mentioned and how much I have grown to love the idea of Rey Palpatine, there is something that I love much more than this: Rey Skywalker. Even just reading it or saying it out loud fills with me an indescribable amount of joy.

To put it bluntly, Rey did not have an easy life. In fact, she probably had one of the most challenging upbringings of any Star Wars protagonist. Yes, Anakin was a slave at a very young age, but he also had friends and a mother who supported him. Luke was even better off with a relatively normal childhood, friends and parental figures who loved him as if he was their own son.

Rey had nothing and no one.

She was forced into a life of struggle and hardship, not by choice, and certainly not by her parents’ choice. Although they loved and cared for her, she would never feel this or know it to be true until much later in life. Rey did not choose where she came from, nor could she choose who she was related to. This is perhaps the most powerful and meaningful message that one could take away from the Sequel Trilogy: You cannot choose the circumstances of your childhood, nor can you choose who you are related to by blood. However, you can choose your destiny, you can choose who you want to be, and you can choose who you consider to be your family.

Rey had all the makings of a villain, but she chose to be a hero. A Sith that chose to be a Jedi. A Palpatine that chose to be a Skywalker. It doesn’t matter where you come from, only where you’re going. At the end of the day, it’s up to you to decide who you want to be. That is a beautiful thing.

Well folks, it took me a long time to get here but we’re finally at the end. I hope this essay was able to make some kind of a comprehensible point. Even if you didn’t agree with anything I said, I hope it was still something that made you think. It was quite a lot of fun to really delve into this topic and explore every microscopic detail. I sure hope it made sense, and if not, I’ll try to do better next time.

Thank you so much for reading! Bye for now.

#star wars #rey #rey palpatine #rey skywalker #TROS #please don't hate me!

[epochofbelief]

Breath Control, Chapter Seven

An A Court of Mist and Fury College Swim Team AU

All characters belong to SJ Maas!

Feysand.... and welcome to Elriel. 

Warnings: cursing

Let me know if you want to be tagged! 

Authors Note: This chapter is a BIG gateway chapter to a lot of things. . . also VERY lightly edited... and enjoy the new POV shift... ;)

Masterlist Link!

SEVEN

~~~Elain~~~

It was around 9 am. I’d been in the kitchen for an hour already, trying to decide what to make for breakfast. I’d started making pancakes, then switched to waffles, then omelets.  I’d be set on my decision for as long as it would take me to pull out all the ingredients for my choice, then I’d change my mind, put everything back, and pull a bunch of different things out. 

My father walked in at around 9:30, as I was pulling the muffins I’d made from scratch out of the oven. I’d decided muffins were neutral enough that everyone in the house would like them and that I could make them well enough to everyone’s satisfaction. Nesta said I worked too hard to please people. 

No clue where she got that idea. . . 

“Is no one else up?” my father said.

I shook my head. “Just me and the muffins.”

He took one, buttered it, and made to sit down. He seemed to think better of it, though, because he set his muffin down and stood up straight. “I’d better go wake Feyre. I want to ask her about all those paint cans and supplies she’s left in the garage, and someone has to be here to eat these muffins. Best to do it know while Mr. Night sleeps; I know how sensitive that girl can be about her painting.”

I nodded, standing alone at the counter before I remembered.

“Dad, Dad, Dad! Let me wake up Feyre. I--um--”

He was halfway up the stairs when I caught up to him, pausing to look down at me. I went with the oldest trick in the book. “Girl stuff.” I widened my eyes meaningfully. “Best if I check up on her first.”

I prayed my father didn’t see through my very feeble attempt to make him uncomfortable. But it worked. He clicked his tongue and descended the staircase. “I’ll take your word for it, Elain. Hurry down. And tell Feyre to hurry too…”

It was like he knew. Oh Feyre was so going to owe me. 

I bounded up the stairs, not slowing until I was at the top of Feyre’s own narrow staircase. I knocked and entered, ready to get a kick out of what was about to happen.

“Oh, Feyreeee, Dad needs you downstairs.”

Nothing for a few moments. I thought I heard whispers but from where I stood, I  couldn’t see anything besides the large lump of her white bed coverings. “I guess I could send Dad up here…”

The whispering became clearer, now, and I made out something like, “Shut up!” and “I’ll handle it” and “Calm the fuck down.” 

Feyre suddenly appeared in a very large t-shirt and nothing else. “Thanks, ‘Lain.” She practically hissed my name. She stalked across the floor toward me. “How’d you know?” She murmured.

“Got up for a glass of water last night. Saw Rhysand’s ass as it cleared the top of the staircase. Figured I’d save you from Dad’s wrath.”

Feyre rolled her eyes. “We didn’t do anything. And Dad has no right to dictate what I can and can’t do.”

“Obviously not,” I agreed. “But he could make things very awkward.”

“True. We’ll--I’ll--be down in a second. Please don’t tell Nesta. She’d be unbearable.”

“Tell me what?” A voice like iron floated across the small landing. 

Feyre shut her eyes and I cringed. Nesta’s judgment might be worse than our father’s.

“Hey, Nesta,” Feyre said guiltily. 

“Feyre. Hi Rhys!” Nesta raised her voice imperceptibly. 

A tan hand rose from the bed. “Why the fuck do you have so many sisters, Archeron?”

The light that shone behind Feyre’s eyes was like nothing I’d ever seen before. In either of my sisters’ faces. Or my own. I bit back my own grin. After Tamlin, and the shitty year Feyre had had, I just wanted her to be happy. And Rhys was so good-natured. Didn’t hurt that he was hot, too. She deserved to look all happy despite being caught out by her two older sisters.

“I’d get downstairs quick. And arrive separately.” Nesta was fighting back a laugh. “I can’t wait to hear Dad chew you out for your sex life. For once, it won’t be me.” She smiled wickedly.

“We didn’t--I didn’t--get out!” Feyre screeched at us. 

“You’re welcome,” Nesta and I said in unison, and we grinned at each other. Feyre pushed us out with surprising strength and slammed the door.  

“That was fun.” Nesta started down the staircase first. 

I was about to respond when my phone vibrated in my back pocket. I pulled it out.

Azriel: Mooorning

“Who’s that?”

“Huh?”

“Don’t play dumb.” Nesta dropped her voice to a low whisper as we descended the main staircase and headed for the kitchen. “You’re grinning like an idiot, and not in the ‘I just caught my sister with a boy in her bed in my dad’s house’ way you were earlier.” 

“Uh, just looking at a meme.” Weak.

“Because you spend so much time scrolling through memes.”

Thankfully, Nesta let the subject drop. I honestly wished she hadn’t. Everyone had been treating me like a fragile piece of glass since the whole Greyson debacle. And while, yes, I wasn’t quite ready to share that I’d been secretly talking to Azriel for the past two months… I was strong enough to handle some sisterly teasing, or even fatherly teasing. Or any kind of teasing.

Instead, everything was, “Oh, Elain, your cookies taste so good!” and, “Oh, Elain, the garden looks wonderful!” and, “Oh, Elain, how’s nursing school?” Nobody wanted to talk about anything real with me, because they thought I wasn’t ready. And if I was the one to start down that road, they’d continue to tread on ice around me and just be grateful I was talking at all. Too grateful to really listen to what I had to say.

Which was why I’d downloaded a dating app two months ago, swiped right on all of two guys before I’d found someone worthy of deleting the app immediately after we started messaging. It’d been a constant stream of texting and snapchatting ever since, even if we hadn’t met up in person yet. My romantic past, Azriel’s loner tendencies, and the fact that he was one of Rhys’s best friends and Feyre’s teammate had made us decide to take things slow. But seeing how happy Feyre was with Rhys--and she didn’t even know it quite yet--made me think that I should tell my sister and then get Azriel to take me out. 

That would certainly surprise everybody. Elain made of glass, indeed.

Before I could lose my nerve, I texted Azriel back. Sliding my phone back into my pocket, I reentered the kitchen with a smile on my face, trying not to ponder on the message I’d just sent.

Elain: I’ve been thinking. . . We should meet up… Face to face. 

Elain: Like on a date. 

I got a response within a moment and didn’t need to check my phone to know what it said.

Azriel: Hell yes. 

~~~FEYRE~~~

I slammed the door shut. I looked behind me to find Rhys, breathtakingly shirtless, propped up on one elbow behind me. 

“What are the chances that both of your lovely sisters keep their mouths shut about this? Cuz I have a feeling even a mutual love for collegiate athletics won’t stop your father from kicking me out of the house for staying the night in your room.”

I slumped onto the bed and he was suddenly there, filling all the empty space in the room as he hovered over me. I closed my eyes, fighting back a smile. “They’ve had their fun. Sisters don’t snitch.”

He rested his forehead against my shoulder. “Great. Not that I care about you, of course. I’m just very concerned about where I’ll have Thanksgiving dinner if your dad kicks me out.”

I sat up and pushed him back against the blankets all in one motion. “You take that back,” I said playfully. 

“Make me.”

“How about I go down there and confess to my dad before Nesta or Elain can rat us out? Then I’d be rid of your sorry ass much more quickly.”

“Feyre!” Elain’s voice floated up the stairs tauntingly, interrupting our flirting.

“This isn’t over, Archeron,” Rhys said threateningly. 

I pointed to the door. “Go put on something presentable. Your hair’s a mess.” 

He scowled. But he kissed me lightly on the lips before he left the room and I almost told him to forget about family breakfast and stay up here with me, instead.

------

The day passed in a blur. We spent the majority of it in the kitchen prepping for Thanksgiving lunch tomorrow afternoon. After a while, we all retired to the living room and marathoned the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Rhys sat next to me on the couch and as soon as it got dark enough outside that my father, Nesta, and Elain probably wouldn’t notice, he took my hand under our shared blanket and I set my head on his shoulder. 

I stayed in his room that night, although we were both too tired to do much other than fall into bed after a day spent in the kitchen. I woke before him the next morning and tiptoed downstairs to let him sleep.

I found Elain and Nesta arguing in my kitchen. 

“Why don’t you just tell me who he is,” Nesta was saying in a very low, very dangerous voice.

“Butt out, Nesta. It’s no one.”

“If it was no one, there’d be nothing for me to butt out of, now would there be?”

Elain was gripping the island countertop in the center of the kitchen. Nesta, surprisingly, was cooking up a huge skillet of scrambled eggs. It smelled as though they were starting to burn while her attention was focused on Elain. 

Elain’s phone vibrated. “Who is he?” Nesta shrieked.

“Fuck off!”

“What’s going on?” I asked. 

They both started speaking at once. 

“Elain’s being stupid--”

“Nesta won’t stay out of my own fucking business--”

“Help me convince her--” 

I held up my hands. “Oh, both of you shut up! Elain. Explain.”

Nesta mumbled something under her breath that I chose not to hear as Elain sighed. “Nesta thinks I’m talking to a boy. She thinks that she has a right to know who he is--if he even exists,” Elain added with an eye roll, “and that she deserves the right to approve. I told her to fuck off, but she’s not listening.”

I’d never heard so many “fucks” from Elain in one conversation. There was definitely a boy. 

“Well, why don’t you tell us? After everything…”

Elain pushed herself back from the countertop, throwing her hands up in the air. “I’m not some fragile teenager who doesn’t know how to speak to boys! Despite what you think about how terribly broken I am after Greyson, I know what I’m doing! And now I don’t want to tell you even more. So leave me alone.” 

She turned and pushed through the door that led from the kitchen to the side yard. 

I looked at Nesta. She looked at me. 

“She better be getting it reallll good to get so upset with us for asking about it,” Nesta said.

I took a seat at the barstools surrounding the island. “Do you think she. . . Do we really treat her like a teenager who doesn’t know how to speak to boys?”

“Maybe. But that’s because she doesn’t know how to speak to boys--or men, for that matter.”

Nesta thought she knew what was best for Elain--and she usually did. But Nesta also liked getting her way. When her way wasn’t Elain’s way. . . It was difficult for both of them. I resolved that no matter what Nesta thought, I’d try to give Elain some space when it came to her Mystery Guy. Even if I was dying to find out who it was. 

“Speaking of boys. . .” Nesta began, but at that moment, Rhys stepped into the kitchen. Thank God. I didn’t know what exactly was going on between us at the moment. Discussing it with Nesta would be torture. 

“Good morning,” I said brightly as Rhys took a seat beside me. 

“Is it?” He asked. Nesta had turned around to find her eggs burnt to a crisp, ignoring Rhys entirely.

“What’s wrong?”

Rhys leaned his elbows on the counter. “My father called. He’s in town. And wants me to spend the weekend with him in my hometown.”

I couldn’t help the fear that gripped me at his words. Was he just making this up because he wanted to escape me? I struggled to keep my voice steady. “Where’s that?” 

“Two hours north of here.”

“Well I can take you and drop you off tomorrow morning,” I managed to say. “Would that work?”

He blinked. “I did tell you that my father is a horrible person, right?”

“Not sure you mentioned it. . . But it’s Thanksgiving. You should be with family.” Which was true. Although I’d rather he stay here.

He rolled his eyes. “I can’t burden you with driving all the way out there and back just so I can spend the weekend with a very unideal candidate.” He gave me a look that told me who was the ideal candidate. Maybe he wasn’t making this up. . . 

“Um. . . Uber?”  Stay here, stay here, stay here.

“Too expensive.” He glanced at Nesta, and then turned to face me more fully. “You could stay with us. We can just make it ‘meet the parents’ week.” He smiled hopefully.

Relief flooded my body. “Well…” I definitely wanted to go with him. Right now I didn’t want to leave his side at all after the past two nights sleeping in his arms. But I didn’t want to offend my family.

Nesta banged the skillet against the edge of the trash can, causing both Rhys and me to jump about a mile. “Go with him, Feyre. I’ll talk to Dad.”

I couldn’t help the smile that exploded across my face. “I guess you’re stuck with me.” I grinned at him. 

“There’s no one else I’d rather be stuck with.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag List: @sleeping-and-books​ @musicalfae​ @queen-of-glass

#acomaf #acotar #a court of mist and fury #a court of mist and fury au #a court of thorns and roses #a court of thorns and roses au #feyre archeron #feyre #rhysand #feyre x rhys #elriel #elain archeron #elain #azriel #sarah j maas #feysand fanfiction #breathcontrol #breathcontrol ar ff #acotar au #acomaf au

[d0ntw0rrybehappy]

i’m going insane lol

so i feel like the next step in working hard is to not even perceive the work i’m doing as tiring. (rereading this it’s making me lol.) it seems weird that i find a part time job at a restaurant this exhausting? and like i can’t pretend that i’m not tired, but i have to somehow take better care of myself and set the conditions to not be tired from it.

i’ve been thinking about baudrillard/barthes a lot still -- pleasantly surprised that their theories are interesting to apply to any- and everything. for example, they both go into how every statement can also be read as its opposite or negation. so, to quote baudrillard, saying “i am not afraid of communism” also implies that communism is something you should be afraid of.

i’ve been using this as a kind of paranoid way to gain insight into why people tell me that i am “strong” because i don’t really know what that means. (other things i am told i am often: sweet, intense). it’s like what they’re saying is, there’s some kind of context, a milieu of weak people i’m being compared to. or like they want to reassure me that i am strong, because i actually come across as how i feel: like a particularly lost, unstable, emotional, sensitive, and lonely person.

i can’t with restaurant work anymore. it. SUCKS. i want to fucking get out, i am like a rat scrabbling at the walls of a glass aquarium. all novelty has worn off, all misguided overtures of honest work or “people skills.” and i’m still stuck here, still holding my breath in the deep end until i can find the eject button. i am tired, my body aches. my body aches!!

i want to just grind my way out (here we are with barthes again -- well if you truly wanted to do that you’d just shut the fuck up and do it instead of writing about it), but here i am, eating another round of chocolate (i don’t smoke, i don’t have sex, i truly just eat), constantly fucking hungry. then like a bull mowing into a red flag i realize i have been grinding...in a completely useless direction. it is like my passion for learning about things gets scattered every which way and i just can’t start, every path is equally exciting and awful and the injunction to “choose” is not “clicking” in my “head.” it’s like my mind cracked open at some point in my teenage years (when i started smoking weed, when my child universe was decisively fractured by a friend) and now the crack is snowing fireworks and glitter and i shift in and out of unreality. 

reality is almost too painful to bear. nobody’s happy: you can find contentment by accepting your current lot, but “happiness" is really just contrast or relief from pain. it comes in and out. most people are too lazy or small-minded or too busy complaining to feel content, or their lives are just too twiggy, got too long in the wrong direction or are just too fucking hard. i guess i still am happy, and still love life, in a sort of ferocious and bloody and hungry way. 

love is bleak, though. i barely even know how to define it anymore. (culture defines a love which we yearn for; we experience “love” insofar as our real love fleetingly resembles this model, only to come up short -- baudrillard). re: love, to use my mom’s favorite school-of-hard-knocks memory device for the laws of thermodynamics -- a subject she took? -- you can’t win, you can’t break even, you can’t get outta the game (and death and taxes). you are going to get royally FUCKED by love just like everybody else, and you are STILL gonna play, you beautiful mortal fool. like the tarot cards lauren dealt me, putting away the three cards she’d used to describe my near future and then flipping through the entire deck, picture side up, without realizing that i was quietly watching it describe my whole entire life -- clinging at the edge of my seat to see some eventual combination that spelled good, strong, lasting love and seeing only struggle, happiness, struggle, pain, struggle, and finally ending, at my death, in a small statue made of gold. 

see also, other realities i hate to swallow: nearly all interpersonal problems are insurmountable and better left undealt with, and work basically sucks unless you are very lucky and very smart. 

work. let’s go back to that. i used to think my work would be respected off its merit; now i see the merit in literally fucking my way up. i wonder if i should even be an artist at all. artists are kinda like showponies or whores; they’re not actually important. the more honest and wonderful they are, the less important they probably are, like schoolteachers. they have an impact on an individual level. but on a societal level, you have no control as an artist. you just get played by bigger fish. better to find a way to have your hands on the gears; that way you have a shot at making a higher-order change to society. but alas, the (capitalist) system is totally out of everyone’s hands and will keep running as usual no matter what you do, still savage in equal amounts, i think. doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. but at this point i’d give a toe or finger to work for someplace like youtube. at least it’s reached critical mass where i could do something cool and make a difference with emerging media. 

that or i pander to whatever blathering brain-melting slop, drivel, they’re putting on tv for kids and adults. or manage to convince a smaller nonprofit that i am “good at talking to people from diverse socioeconomic backgrounds,” whatever the hell that fucking means. or maybe, ugh god, i’ll work for an ad agency? or do digital strategy? and um, i could say some shit about how capitalism is darwinism and money is a form of social control that works so well because it’s out of the hands of any individual person, and i should probably just stick with art and believe in it, and maybe like, apply for grants. but i want a job, a full-time job. i want stability and enough money that i don't feel guilty buying new underwear and i don't want to hustle to keep the tap running month-to-month and i want to spend the majority of my time doing something i find fulfilling. and soon enough i'll get that, and all my dreams will come true: i’m going to get married and become a fat mom taking my kids to piano practice and saying “the meeting went on forever today,” and i’ll have a husband who never cleans the house enough, and then we’ll get divorced and he’ll find someone 20 years younger and i’ll live out the rest of my years semi-happily alone and i don’t know how i will ever have time to make art again. or if i do i just hope it’s not hobby-like, second-rate.

i wish i could have (feel) the bare-faced honesty and love of sha’carri richardson hugging her grandmother after she worked her ass off for a race. instead everything is this weird simulation where i never feel like i love anybody enough or like i’m working hard enough. i can’t speak honestly except when i am writing about myself (strong, sweet, intense, narcissistic) or things i have noticed, as directed to my own imaginary friend. when i try to communicate irl (or, worst of all, “be real”) it’s all so overthought, overwrought, self-conscious. the only person who knows my real private self is the girl winking at me on my black lives matter poster. i hope she doesn’t mind being here in my room. ducky, the stuffed animal brandon gave me, was also supportive but i put him away because it seemed bad to tell future guys that my stuffed animal is “the child of divorce.” and now /you guys/ know me a little bit, because i took the time to pretend you were all my imaginary friend, my dearest pen pal who laughs at all my jokes and gets all my references, and stopped pretending i was anything besides what’s written here. 

and i think, like, a lot of people now live in this weird simulation? and are so confused about romantic and familial love to the point where everyone is getting off on family members fucking each other and can’t decide if it’s normal to think kids are hot? but i guess that was always some weird fucked-up demon side of human existence? another thing i’m supposed to accept. (also sorry trigger warning.) and another thing i took for granted as a child, that most people, if not everyone, is weird/gross/evil, but now that my mind is cracked this shocks me all over again and i seek some sort of explanation. it’s like i can’t find a real hunk of closeness anywhere. i’m close to my own family, but in my other relationships we’re either too distant or too close and i’m desperately searching for just some normal friends. and to be able to give a speech where i tell someone i really love them and for it to ring true. but i try to be grateful that i live in driving distance to the beach and there’s air conditioning and once i stop being a stupid baby there’s probably more friends and work and stuff out there for me. and then i’ll have some new problem.

#i would put this as read more but it doesnt work on my blog SORRYYY

[roc-thoughtblog]

Sense and Sensibility Readthrough Part 19

Chapter 22, Pages 111-119

Hubris is defined as not taking your medication for the week and assuming you'd still have a productive time. It's only 5pm Wednesday so it's not too late to humble myself.

Previously, the Miss Steeles were introduced. The older is very much into beaux, and the younger is very often socially mortified by the former. Elinor is disapproves, but, they mysteriously know Eddie Ferrars, so perhaps she will have to put up with them until they give up the goods.

Not that her opinion matters too greatly when Sir Middleton never runs out of social plans. :'D

Also, thank you for telling me beaux is plural of beau!

Commenting from after having read the chapter: Oh, Elinor...

Readthrough below.

Chapter 22

MARIANNE, WHO never had much tolerance for anything like [...]

And this first sentence goes the whole first paragraph for a whopping 11 lines! It's not exclusively about Marianne's intolerances but there's still quite a lot of that. The second half is about how the Steele sisters prefer Elinor because Marianne is just that standoffish with them but I wonder if there's a literary purpose to cramming all that information into one sentence? It's certainly taxing to get my mind around, though I'm not really sure that's reflective of the Steeles when it's partially about Marianne. Perhaps all parties are exhausting?

In Lucy Steele, the younger sister, Elinor finds a companion of natural wit and intelligence, but lacking in any formal education; though I assume by "illiterate" Austen means that Lucy is simply not versed in literature, as opposed to outright illiterate.

She still doesn't like her.

Seems she also finds Lucy to be flippant and lacking any consistency of opinion, and maybe also attention-seeky. Also that they can't really talk about anything interesting to Elinor as she's not educated enough to share any tastes. That's... a shame that Elinor takes this stance. She reads Lucy's constant flattery of everything as insincerety but I don't have any reason not to think Lucy is just a genuinely positive person about everything. Personally, I would call nearabouts everyone I meet really nice, but that doesn't mean I don't think it's true! As you can see as I try to defy the interpretations of almost every character that has been described unflatteringly by the Dashwood sisters. :'D

Except Mr. Palmer, I have no good interpretations of Mr. Palmer.

Also, just because she's not formally educated doesn't mean she can't be fun to talk to! Engage people on their interests Elinor, not just your personal tastes! Well, I say all this but it's not as though I always live up to my ideal of open sociability.

Lucy asks Elinor if she knows Mrs. Ferrars, Eddie's mother. Elinor is reticent to reveal that she thinks his mother is uh, controlling, but does I think truthfully respond that she's never met the lady in person.

Elinor replies without explicit dialogue a lot, which in the Dashwood sisters I've started to take as signifying instances where not merely do they have nothing interesting to say for the reader to read, but also that they are not invested enough in their conversation partner enough to give a proper reply. Elinor does this a little bit here to Lucy, until, that is, Lucy really catches her interest. Now it's ALL DIALOGUE.

See, Lucy really genuinely wants to know about Mrs. Ferrars, surprising Elinor indeed, who's still hung up on the question of how the Steeles are connected to the Ferrars.

"But if I dared not tell you all, you would not be so much surprised. Mrs. Ferrars is certainly nothing to me at present - but the time may come - how soon it will come must depend upon herself - when we may be very intimately connected."

Oh. Oooooohhhh no. Oooooooh boy. Hmm. Yes. Well. I remember Eddie has a more successful (younger?) brother, but I feel like this isn't a fake-out just to give Elinor a heart attack and then move on. Somebody familiar with Austen and queer readings correct me on this, but I also don't see the remote possibility that this is implying Miss Steele is hooking up with Eddie's mother. So.........

I'm sitting here having not turned to the next page yet. Good heavens! indeed, Elinor.

"No," replied Lucy, "not to Mr. Robert Ferrars - I never saw him in my life; but," fixing her eyes upon Elinor, "to his eldest brother."

T-there it is. And Eddie has the hair ring too, doesn't sound one-sided... could still be parental setup, but Lucy apparently doesn't know nearly enough about Mrs. Ferrars...

What Elinor felt at that moment? Astonishment, that would have been as painful as it was strong, had not an immediate disbelief of assertion attended it.

Oh no. As painful as it is strong? Poor Elinor, that's going to hurt when the shock wears off...

A moment of silence for Elinor before I continue, which I'm going to take a short walk on.

So Elinor's... outwardly taking it well. Lucy continues her explanation.

FOUR YEARS.

FOUR YEARS.

LUCY AND EDDIE HAVE BEEN ENGAGED FOUR YEARS.

EDWARD AND LUCY HAVE KEPT THEIR ENGAGEMENT A SECRET FOR FOUR YEARS.

"May I ask if your engagement is long standing?" "We have been engaged these four years."

FOUR YEARS.

ELINOR NEVER HAD A CHANCE.

"I know he has the highest opinion in the world of all your family, and looks upon yourself and the other Miss Dashwoods quite as his own sisters -"

SHE WAS JUST A FRIEND. SHE WAS JUST   A   F R I E N D.

S H E   W A S   L I K E   A   S I S T E R   T O   H I M.

Alright. Well I needed to process that a bit too.

See, it's one thing for me to expect that Eddie was already engaged to somebody else. I would've been ready for that. Maybe he just moved on after Elinor was gone or something. I would've been like "yep, yeah that was expected." But FOUR YEARS. HE WAS ALREADY ENGAGED FOUR YEARS AGO.

How does this recontextualise the earlier parts of the novel? It was a hundred pages ago I don't even remember! Was this all the Dashwoods' imaginations? Am I going to go back and find out the narrative very specifically refused to state anything except that the Dashwoods thought this to be the case? Was Edward leading Elinor along the whole time? Did he know?? He seemed to be feeling guilt or shame or something so he must know about Elinor's feelings right??? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ANyway.

So it's been a secret the whole time. Of Lucy's family only Anne Steele knows, and considering Edward I imagine literally nobody knows in general. Lucy and Edward have known each other for many years, ever since Edward stayed with her uncle Mr. Pratt, whom I don't recall coming up at all before but I wouldn't be surprised if he was name-dropped once in the beginning. Edward is so reticent about himself that Elinor barely knows/remembers anything about Mr. Pratt's existence.

I'm taking these quotes thoroughly out of order because I have been knocked out of order, but I want to highlight this;

Her astonishment at what she heard was at first too great for words; but at length forcing herself to speak, and to speak cautiously, she said, with calmness of manner, which tolerably well concealed her surprise and solicitude:

The forced calm, trying to suppress the adrenaline early, trying to keep up the mask of the disaffected. It was obvious enough that Lucy noticed and stopped mid-sentence to wait for her. Oh Elinor. How fast is her heart beating? Where has her breath gone? And "tolerably well concealed" is not "concealed." She's speaking slowly and carefully, before she's even calmed down. How much shakiness is still audible in her words? How taut has each syllable been stretched, to maintain control? Where was the misplaced pause, a necessity to find the next word?

"May- may I ask if your engagement has been long standing?" "May  I ask   if   your   engagement   has been long- long standing?" "May I   ask   if your engagement has been longstanding?"

Anyway.

Elinor's in either the denial stage or the bargaining stage. Well it's a lot to spring on her, we can't all have omniescent narrative security from beyond the fourth wall.

"Though you do not know him so well as me, Miss Dashwood, you must have seen enough of him to be sensible he is very capable of making a woman sincerely attached to him." “Certainly," answered Elinor, without knowing what she said;

PFFHAHA. Well, Elinor's composure is well and truly gone. If there's one positive thing that might come out of love triangles (positive negotiation sort, not toxic rivalry) it would be the sincere solidarity over the best qualities of the subject of their competitive affections. Though it doesn't seem like Elinor is disposed to be friends with Lucy, sadly...

I think Lucy just wants to be friends, but, uh, well. On the one hand I don't know how sensitive she's being right now really but on the other hand, I dunno how you can sensitively break it to someone that their crush has actually been your fiance for FOUR YEARS. Like, if Eddie knew, this is something he shoulda nipped in the bud long ago.

I think I've already spent an hour trying to process everything here.

The secrecy of the engagement makes sense too. I don't think Eddie's mother would ever have approved of any engagement without thorough vetting of the suitor's prospects. A secret youthful engagement must therefore remain very secret. No wonder Lucy's so concerned about Mrs. Ferrars now, too. And Eddie's only known the Dashwoods with the context of his sister hovering nearby, just ready to be generally Fanny. If information about Lucy had gotten out to Marianne that would already be a risk, but there was MARGARET too, and that sure worked out for Elinor. No wonder the Dashwoods heard nothing.

...

Elinor could tank this if she leaked the engagement. Please don't do that Elinor, it- oh no. Elinor won't do that. What if Marianne does it on Elinor's behalf? Oh no oh no. I hope that doesn't happen. Lucy's a nice girl. :(

Come to think of it, as far as underhanded deals go, there is a possibility that Lucy is actually faking this information, knowing that Elinor is interested in Edward, in order to drive her away. That... wouldn't be the case would it...? But he does have the hair ring... It's not like she pressed her into an engagement right...? AM I BARGAINING ON ELINOR'S BEHALF?

Lucy demonstrably proves she's talking about Edward Ferrars and nobody else by showing Elinor a picture of her beau. A thought, considering how much Edward has spoken to Lucy of the Dashwoods, no wonder she was so keen to meet them.

And Lucy is so happy to be able to confide in Elinor because she has noone else besides Anne, who is understandably a liablity in terms of secrecy, and gives poor advice in general. How fortunate to have somebody so level-headed as Elinor! Edward's name coming up at all from Sir Middleton did mortify her at the possibility of beans being spilled. Lucy is so stressed that the secrecy is such that she barely gets to see Edward at all, and never knows what will be of her future. Please Lucy, you know the context of Edward's being mentioned at all, spare a thought for Elinor. :(

Here she took out her handkerchief; but Elinor did not feel very compassionate.

... Yeah.

"Sometimes," continued Lucy, after wiping her eyes, "I think whether it would not be better for us both to break off the matter entirely. [...] What would you advise me to do in such a case, Miss Dashwood?"

Uh. Wrong person to ask. Elinor sure thinks so too. Ah but Lucy even explains why he's been despirited. So it's not as much any guilt or shame so much as stress about his future with Lucy. It does also explain him leaving in a hurry with no explanation, anything related to Lucy would have no explanation given.

And Lucy shows Elinor a letter sent to her by Edward; now all doubts are cleared. She also explains that the hair-set ring is hers, asking her if she had seen it;

"I did," said Elinor, with a composure of voice, under which was concealed an emotion and distress beyond anything she had ever felt before."

After sitting with them a few minutes, the Miss Steeles returned to the Park, and Elinor was at liberty to think and be wretched.

Poor Elinor. "at liberty to think and be wretched" is also a very nice line to end a chapter on. I've definitely felt that before too.

Well.

This chapter. A lot happened here. What's Marianne going to find out next about Willoughby when the Palmers return?? We still don't know about Brandon's daughter!!

I understand now too why the chapter with the Palmers got sandwiched between the preceding chapters and the introduction of the Steeles, and why the transition seemed strangely long. The lack of information lulls a false sense of security, and also it's a small buffer in the pacing to not immediately just, roll reveals onto the reader.

I can think of Lucy as nothing but earnest at least, though, quite insensitive to Elinor's feelings in a way that should have been obvious. Umm. I don't know what to say or think about Edward right now. He's barely appeared really, I can't get a read on him. Floating the idea at the end that Lucy is not secure in her engagement, and also that it could be easily broken by the secret getting out, does... leave the whole consequences of this reveal up in the air really. It's thoroughly within Elinor's power to break them up, but...

Ah, my minds a bit overloaded now and I've gone way overtime so I'll leave the rest to consider next time after I've digested it a bit.

Poor Elinor.

#2400 words #dear lord I went long #and i'm exhausted #poor Elinor #Jane Austen #Sense and Sensibility #readthrough #novels

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

SPOILER ALERTS FOR THE RECENT BNHA CHAPTERS!!

I know I'll be alright, but I'm not tonight I'll be lying awake counting all the mistakes I've made Replaying fights I know I'll be alright, but I'm not tonight I lost a friend, I lost a friend

Amy and Twice and Toga:

Man... why does manga gotta do me like that...? *sigh* That was heartbreaking... 

And Amy... she was friends with Twice. And is still friends with Toga. She liked both of them even if they were villains, even if they are the ‘enemies’, even if they attacked her classmates. However, you can’t blame her for that, after all, her own fellow witches have all at least tried to kill each other (including her) several times so she doesn’t hold that against them. It all began during the Summer Training arc into the Kamino Ward Arc.

She first met Toga when the latter snuck up and attacked her, however, Amy was impressed by her speed and sneakiness and the girls instantly just started talking and complimenting each other like two girls at the mall liking each other’s outfits but WITHOUT dissing each other behind each other’s backs. Amy and Toga practically forgot that they were supposed to be fighting each other and instead just talked with Toga outright telling Amy about her new crush, and Amy picked up that she had fallen for Midoriya. As Amy told her nervously that she liked him too, Toga didn’t seem angered or jealous, but rather, ecstatic as she said ‘they had SO much in common!’ much to Amy’s delight.

However, Amy WAS aware that Toga wasn’t stable but she didn’t seem bothered by it since Amy herself isn’t that stable either. Although she was startled when the rest of the villains kidnapped Bakugo and Amy transmutated herself along into the warp in an an attempt to rescue him but ended up getting captured herself.

Toga was excited to see Amy again, and the girls greeted each other way too casually despite everything. Amy then met Twice, who she happily talked to and chatted with, much to Bakugo and Shigaraki’s great annoyance. Bakugo because they were villains and Shigaraki because they were supposed to be intimidating them, but Amy blissfully ignored them both and during her capture she spent most of her time having ‘girl talk’ with Toga while also getting to know Twice. Twice was fond of Amy’s spirited personality as she made him laugh with several of her jokes and the jabs she made at Shigaraki. Amy, although well aware that they were villains, grew very fond of Toga and Twice, and this was despite the fact that the villains put a shock collar around her neck so she didn’t use her magic.

Nonetheless, when Amy requested that the three of them take a selfie together, Toga was all too happy to get Amy’s phone (that they confiscated) as Twice snapped the picture of all three of them together (with Amy still tied up). Their friendship was also solidified with Toga fondly calling Amy ‘Ames’ like everyone tends to call her, and Amy informally calling Toga ‘Himiko-chan’ and Twice by ‘Jin-san’.

However, when Shigaraki made the offer to Bakugo and Amy to join the villains, Amy was much more hesitant because while she liked Toga and Twice, she thought about Shinsou and her other classmates and didn’t want to make a choice. Thankfully, Bakugo reacted by attacking Twice once the two of them were freed and ignored Amy’s pleas for him to not act so impulsively, but in the nick of time, the pro-heroes showed up to rescue them. Toga and Twice didn’t seem bothered by the fact that Amy was going to be rescued as Toga instead just cheerfully told Amy that they should hang out the next time they meet, something Amy happily agrees to, at least until she’s caught in the crossfire of All For One’s entrance and the debris knocks her out and is later rescued by Madison.

Afterwards, a bummed Amy would think about Toga and Twice as she found herself missing them when her classmates weren’t entertaining her the way Toga and Twice did. And when Amy quit UA and isolated herself in her mansion, she would often glance at the selfie that they took together and fondly smile when she thought of the two villains. Amy knew that they came from two different worlds, but felt that she could understand Twice and Toga more than she could her classmates due to coming from a similar street. 

Her friendship with the two of them allowed Amy to see more of the flaws of hero society, and seeing heroes beginning to imprison some villains began to bother Amy. Thinking about Twice and Toga and their pasts as she used her divination to find them, allowed her to see into their minds. As she got a glimpse of their pasts, she was overwhelmed with sympathy  With Twice being essentially left behind by hero society and never received the help he needed and Toga being forced to fit in with what was ‘normal’ in society. Amy realized that she was treated the same way, with society pressuring her to act like a hero and the fact that she, like Twice, was abandoned by the heroes as well.

As she stayed in her mansion contemplating on whether to remain with her witch sisters or go back to her hero friends, she would also wonder and hope that Toga and Twice were okay. 

Later, as Amy returned from her isolation just in time to help her classmates during the War arc, she later froze in horror upon sensing Twice’s death and Toga’s loss. Causing the girl to suffer a breakdown as she realized that one of her friends had died. When everything was over, Amy came to the realization that Cordelia was right, that hero society doesn’t deserve her because of how they treated and discarded people like Toga and Twice even though they needed help. Disgusted, Amy only helps for her classmates’ sake but lost her faith in the pro-heroes officially, even going so far as to call Hawks a ‘murderer’ when she found out that he betrayed, manipulated and led to Twice’s death. She would have even attacked him in the aftermath had it not been for Bakugo stopping her. Afterwards, the young witch retreated back to her mansion to grieve her fallen friend. 

Twice’s death ended up playing a role in Amy’s second relapse after recovering, as in the original timeline Amy did not see what happened beyond the Culture Festival arc as Michael was rising to power and it enabled her to return to Robichaux before she could intern with Endeavor. Amy and Mallory saved the world by redeeming Michael, and it allowed Amy to give the pro-heroes another chance, but unfortunately in the new timeline when they once again disappointed her she began to rethink her decision when her friend is killed.

Amy: A good man died... he was a troubled man and so he did bad things and killed people, I won’t deny that... but he was still good. Yet he was cast out... neglected by society... and labeled a villain when no one else but the other ‘villains’ accepted him. That’s not his fault... after all... what the hell did the heroes do for him? Nothing... so many could have done so much... yet nobody did nothing... but it’s my own fault... I made a mistake... I believed that the heroes could improve, I gave them another chance to start caring about the misfits, and not merely select who’s worthy of being rescued... but that was my mistake... giving you liars that chance... I should have let Michael kill every fucking last one of you...  

Amy cared so much about Twice that she hatefully muttered to herself that she almost regretted not letting Michael destroy the world because the pro-heroes still did nothing to help people like her, Toga or Twice. However, as Amy thinks of Shinsou and the friends she’s made such as Bakugo, Kaminari, Todoroki, Ashido, Iida and Ashlen (who she had yet to meet in person at the time) she then thinks about her earlier sentiment and realizes that while she lost a friend, she still has some who genuinely care about her and Amy holds back from going on another rampage for the sake of the people she loves. Although Amy had lost her faith in hero society, she still cared enough about her other friends to be on their side and hopefully make sure that they don’t end up like the current pro-heroes.

In the modern day, Amy still isn’t over it and mourns Twice whenever she thinks about him and only hopes that Toga will be okay on this path she’s on. Likewise, Amy grew to dislike Hawks for what he did to Twice, claiming that she will never forgive him for it. Most of her friends disapprove of the fact that she’s friends with her and sometimes scold her for even being kind to the villains, but an irritable Amy almost always tells them that they can’t understand how she feels and they can’t understand how SHE understood them. 

Toga might be mentally unstable, but Amy gets defensive when this is pointed out because she’s no different from her and can understand the other girl because she knows what it’s like to be told that she’s ‘not normal’. Likewise, Amy doesn’t hesitate to tell them that she can understand why Twice lost his sanity because the so-called heroes did nothing to help him like they did nothing to help her when she needed it the most.

It’s another sensitive subject for her because it further makes her think about her past traumas and how hero society failed to protect and save her too. And she cared for Twice and still cares for Toga, and she isn’t looking forward the heroes having another conflict with them because despite everything, Toga is Amy’s friend and Twice was also Amy’s friend. And in return, Toga still consider Amy her friend and Twice still thought of Amy as his friend even in his last moments.

Twice’s picture would then go in Amy’s scrapbook full of the people she loved and lost in her life.

#amy martinez #bnha twice #rip twice #bnha jin #jin bubaigawara #himiko toga #bnha toga #mha #mha oc #my hero academia toga #boku no hero academia toga #toga himiko #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bnha oc #ahs #american horror story #ahs coven #american horror story coven #bnha spoilers #bnha chapter 266

[hidden-not-isolated]

Hidden, Not Isolated [C2]

On the following day, hell struck. 

On the following day, it rained.

- - -

Plop.

Snapping back to consciousness, his awakening supported alongside a startled twitch whilst his briefly bewildered eyes had rapidly flickered a few times in surprise as he took a moment to fear-filled-ly realize the heavy drop that had splattered upon contact with his forehead, was a droplet of water, evident to the feeling that he got when it had literally plummeted upon him and a swift touch of the palm which instinctively turned into a wipe.

After taking a quick glimpse at his now somewhat wet hand, his head steadily began to promptly turn upwards and towards the sky, curious to see if it was anything else than what he inwardly knew it was or was a different cause that would significantly relieve his mind, one-hundred-and-ten-percent. After all, even if it was unlikely, had it be anything of a recently fractured pipe or other, he would be able to swiftly shift two feet to the left and get him and his mind back to sleep.

Sleep.

The water woke him.

The water woke him.

The water woke him from an incredibly peaceful illusion of where he wasn’t even aware that he would ultimately be unmercifully dragged back to the reality of where he was stunk in the same spot, him not even being able to complete his self-mission with the astonishingly high risk of someone spotting him and calling the police, the police to take him to a jail where all of his freedom would be restricted and stripped from him significantly. Or, you know, just to die.

Plop.

His head instinctively snapped back to the alleyway.

Slow pitter-patter. 

Keeping his head down, right eye shut, he glanced upwards slightly with his free vision, a fearful expression in tow.

Just constant pitter-patter.

His mind was so petrified of the whirlwind of the day he just had at that point, that he denied facts, “I’ll be fine...” 

I mean, facts were always the things that he had once lent towards, shakily muttering that to no one but the nighttime’s atmosphere. His eyes being closed, him shying his eyes with his uncontrollably quivering hands like a child cowarding in their closet, did nothing physically for him. However, mentally is where there’s something to be said. Maybe, just maybe, if he could stay in this one position for however long it takes, solutions would just come to him without him doing a thing himself...yes, of course!

There was hope! Surely! Everything has a happy ending! Everyone gets a second chance! Everything will be okay! Yes, and now his happy ending is even closer! And even closer! And yet again! It’s all about patience, perseverance! Nothing can last forever! In good ways too! Everything gets resolved at one point or another! Any moment now! Of course! 

Any moment now!

Any moment now!

Any moment now!

Not that he was smiling or anything.

Internally, he could hear his subconscious informing him in his mind of things he already knew, though he continuously refused to accept the facts at each and every opportunity possible. Honestly, his subconscious wasn’t at fault though. It was the voice of reason, not him. It wasn’t scolding him for running away from his problems. It wasn’t telling him unnecessarily negative things. It was just calmly and casually mentioning him of his responsibilities and he was drastically overreacting. He knew that. Shut up, shut up, shut up...

What are you doing...?

You can’t just stay here forever.

Everybody needs food and water sometime.

It hasn’t even been as much as a day yet.

If this is how every day is going to go, what would be of point of where you just give up?

Can you truly back to that kind of isolation once again?

Then again, what choice do you have?

If someone spots you, you’re gone.

What are you going to do?

Dragging the heavy weight that was his legs upwards, he painstakingly buried his expression in his knees, gathering himself up and into a trembling sphere to run away from his problems in a sense that he wanted to just evade of the subject of this horrid reality itself for a while, even if he knew that it wasn’t going to last forever and would plausibly be difficult to get a good-night’s-sleep with the hopeless rain beating. 

Forcing himself to overlook that typical ounce of common-sense, his eyelids developed heavier and heavier once again, encouraging him to disregard the frigid liquid repeatedly plunging onto his being again and again as he gradually began to weaken into an unconscious status once again.

CRASH.

The somewhat outcry that had immediately ejected from his mouth instinctively was nothing in comparison to the roaring crack of thunder overhead, accompanied amidst a blinding outburst of lightning in the atmosphere. He had uncontrollably flinched violently in backlash to the sound in the background, obviously awakening before he hesitantly twisted his head upwards, finding himself gawking at the immeasurable sky above. The pitch-black sky just seemed to be so vast and endless all-so-suddenly; he could barely remember the normally azure sky anymore; the normally azure sky that illuminated the town so he could easily locate every possible ambush spot. After all, any central would constantly be freely roaming with criminals inhabiting the enigmatic shadows of which nobody would think to look for the sinner evading deserved consequence.

I mean,

When you phrase it like that,

It sounds kind of like Soren.

But I’m not sure he’s a big fan of irony. 

CRASH.

His frightened outcry echoed in the atmosphere whilst his eyes widened in alert as another rupture of electricity rippled across the sky nothing more than moments later following the initial explosion. His heart suddenly hammering back and forth within his already frightened chest, his scared breaths steadily moulded into rapid heaves of hyperventilation. Ironically, even though he was making a conscious effort to breathe, the more he gasped for oxygen, the fleeter puffs he could inhale, the more his chest tightened, the most tortuously uncomfortable it was to breathe.

He couldn’t catch his breath.

His hypertension, stress, tiredness, and difficulty breathing eventually forced his eyesight to increasingly turn into a continually foggy blur that strongly intensified every now and then. Hell, he barely could be able to make out the thick silhouette of his own hand briefly waving in front of him as his eyes grew significantly heavier. He wasn’t only unable to locate him. He wasn’t only unable to talk to people. He wasn’t only unable to stay positive. He wasn’t only unable to persist through the storm.

He wasn’t able to take second-nature ticks to survive.

CRASH.

Again,

His existence was useless.

His heart frantically thumping faster than a cheetah, his sensitive skin being overlapped with panicking stress, the frequent roaring blots of thunder being replaced with an ear-piercing ring whilst his chest screeched, achingly powerless to inhale without exhaling the air instantaneously in the same half-second to the point of not being able to breathe at all, everything in his view extremely fuzzy, reality a haze beyond identification, 

Everything went silent.

- - - 

Heavy breathing.

Piercing ring.

Blur.

Heavy breathing.

Piercing ring.

Blur.

Heavy breathing.

Piercing ring.

Blur.

- - -

Where...am...I...?

Not only did he wonder about the glooming shadows crowding down on him, but was there an anvil on his chest and eyelids or something? His weak pants of air could only barely squeeze past his lips, whiffs fortunately smoothly gliding through his throat as his huffing sent into the breezing environment, environment anciently narrow. The invisible force on his eyelids may be a contributing factor to the continuous smears that his common-sense confirmed to be reality past the tone of broken breeze streaming throughout the proximity and physical coating of vast coldness.

Alleyway.

Right.

Wanted.

Hide.

Rain.

All that.

Awakening out of a crumpled mess, the cloudy dust trapping him forced his eyes to warningly bolt together to suddenly cough aloud amidst his mind, his mind filled with dismay of his abrupt breakdown, his chest vigorously tightening with each and every dry wheeze that had tumbled out from his throat until he was left with nothing but the damp, alley floor as he dragged himself upwards, sitting so dumbfoundedly.

When had he fallen asleep again?

Not only that, but if he had only just woken up, why was he so exhausted? Was he exhausted in his thoughts? Was that it? That would make sense. He couldn’t step a foot out of the shadows without the risk of someone beckoning the police on him, him knowing that he wouldn’t be able to fend himself if his life depended on it. Which it did. After all, if the authorities succeeded to find him, who’s to say that they would just let him off easier merely because he was apparently apologetic for deceiving the entire world and cheating the laws of physics, literally running away from consequence instead of owning up? What was he going to tell the police if he was ultimately discovered anyway?

I’m sincerely sorry. I’m aware I’ve consciously committed appalling sins but I’m also sincerely wanting not to pay the consequence, so may you be so kind as to help me find refuge?

No surprise there; that sounded ridiculous.

Same kind of ridiculous that was what sent his mind plunging down a spawl staircase, passing out along the way.

Not being sure what to do with his useless mind and useless thoughts, he hopelessly settled his hands upon the dimly lit ground, his bones being dangerously vulnerable in comparison to an average’s health; it may having something to do with the fact that he and his well-being hadn’t had anything of a day of where he could just go about its routine without a worry in the world for quite a while.

But he ignored that.

He’s seen worse, right?

Forcefully pressing his arms against the stone, he used his palms to prompt his body upwards whilst he realized just how unforgivingly cold the alleyway was yet again, even if the atmosphere presented now was an azure hue amidst the warmth that just seemed to purposely evade him as he slowly tore his numbly aching figure up and into an uncontrollably loose standing status.

Everything spinning.

His dizzy standstill propelled his head in circles, taunting to stumble face-first into the stone pavement, probably breaking his nose. Beyond the haze that was his fatigue, he was conscious enough to know that his reaction-times weren’t nearly sharp as they used to be. And when they used to be, he could defend himself. Hell, his strength to balance was tested just by using the cold wall behind himself to lean his weight against. Or lack-there-of, I mean. As his eyes forced themselves to cross, his lungs catching its breath as if it had run a marathon, Soren slipped entirely disoriented within his own thoughts. Again.

Lack of refuge.

Lack of hope.

Lack of courage.

Lack of understanding.

Lack of companions.

Lack of direction.

Lack of safety.

Lack of foresight,

Lack of survival-instinct.

Lack of strength.

Lack of health.

Well, things were just going phenomenal, weren't they?

“Where are they?”

Jumping out of his skin, the gasp that had ejected from his mouth had been somewhat muffled with the instinctive teeth-grit and hands instantaneously overlaying his mouth tightly whilst he simultaneously dropped himself from against the wall and into a sitting position on the alleyway floor, eyes showing sympathy for himself.

“They said their house was near the gate; let’s head there.”

Instinctively holding his breath, he didn’t even realize that he had checked off dizziness from his list of priorities, daze itself withering away from him.

“Okay...”

He never even truly thought about that.

He was wanted.

People were pursuing him.

People were pursuing him.

An internal screech echoes within his mind.

Sincerely, this was ironic. Mentally, his voice of reason always reminded him that half of his anxieties were irrational and with the natural: “I’m the protagonist, what bad could truly happen to me?” mindset, this knowledge was actively rattling his subconscious to the core amidst conversations overheard to and fro, loudly fusing out of tune. Now that he had a very, very valid reason to exclusively seek refuge out of silhouettes, he was assuredly at a loss. Great. It’s not like the very person he was seeking for would just happen to candidly stroll by the alleyway, would he? His luck was just far to low for that.

Once again,

He was truly at a loss.

- - -

Accidentally withdrawing from an insomniac slumber, his eyelids daringly parted ways amidst consciously heaving his own adagio, broken breaths of heavily deep puffing which evaporated as soon as they left his mouth, rising towards the darkly clouded atmosphere as he figuratively felt the anvil on his chest make its second appearance on the fourth day alone. The cold wheezes gradually chilled the alleyway insignificantly whilst his dazed body embraced strangely tranquil feeling, rendering him unusually paralyzed to movements, the beading feeling of his senses abnormally numb.

He couldn’t move.

The apathetic feeling that was determined to immobilize him on the fourth day shuddered his soul to the core while his figure persisted to welcome a moveless status; A status moveless to the point of being senseless, unable to feel any positive feeling. That is, including a piercingly intense agony within his stomach, it intensifying to and fro, a demand greater than the desire to find refuge--an apparent command for food.

He was starving.

Stitching together enough self-preservation to try to thoroughly investigate the proximity, he strained to costively drag himself from his loose posture on the damp ground and into a limp sitting position, drastically exhausting whatever fragments that were left of his strength just by tearing his aching being from the pavement. His head was left to aimlessly hang from his scratchy neck and his newly fainted eyes to uselessly gaze at the concrete for a few moments before his lungs suddenly busted out into a coughing fit with little to no warning, the heavy rasp growing in his throat temporality erupting in escape beyond his lips, chest once again stiffening and slackening on and off with every bare wheeze, mind stuffed with plead to quit hacking his precious breath away.

. . .

His chest impermanently released of any built-up, itching discomfort, his confidence was somewhat restored by rationalizing that at least some of his tickling nausea had to be relieved, right? Dust violently expelled from his lungs, he hesitantly took that opportunity to plant his hands on the ground, not even paying any mind to the stiffly brisk floor beyond the powerful demand for food. As he tentatively used his sensitively vulnerable arms to hoist himself upward, he frantically ripped through the relatively tranquil atmosphere the second he settled his feet on the ground, seeing as he instantaneously stumbled over his own balance amongst a flinch, forcing his right shoulder to vigorously smash against the alleyway wall, him letting out an automatic, relatively loud outcry on impact, the side of his head cracking into the aforementioned building seconds after, the sudden movement abrupt to the point of being stunned even after instinctively securing his position with a hand weakly pressed upon the wall and yet another coughing frenzy simultaneously.

So standing was a no-go.

Take it that what had happened was that he hadn’t realized that his legs were frail to the point of being worthless until he had tripped over his absence of weight.

So he was useless.

His legs taunting to allow him to drop to the ground and him still being hungry, he quickly skimmed to the floor in defeatist, back to the wall.

So he was staving.

Him with an absence of an actual objective other than generally “find food,” he pointlessly studied the science of nothing what-so-ever besides catching his breath whilst gawking at the drizzly alleyway floor in front of him for a minute as his arms remained tightly grasped around his legs protectively, refusing to accept the fact that he couldn’t just shield himself from the shadows caving-in on him that effortlessly. Him himself trembling with both cold and disquietude, a shiver raced through his spine within the presence of the chilled nighttime air ensnaring him in its clouds of eclipsed enigma; Somehow, the luna’s duskiness really just felt rather worse than the other couple of nighttimes somehow. Just his luck. Would anything go his way? Perhaps only so many things go your way in life and perhaps he had previously swallowed up all of his. As for disquietude, he literally had nothing on him to guard himself against potential menaces with...

...right?

Fatigued sword...

Habits of the Endermen...

Walking Among the Endermen...

Compass...

Pickaxe...

A Man Forever Voyaging...

Torch...

Chorus Fruit...

Chorus Fruit?

They’re fruit...

They’re edible...!

He didn’t even remember he had those...!

I mean, not exactly much of a meal but at least a slice of his satisfaction and hunger would be restored from consuming a few of these berries, worst-case-scenario for him to call it a day there, right?

As he sank his teeth into the purple food, he couldn’t even swallow before he suddenly got a strange feeling briefly as if something bad was about to happen amidst a fuzzy sensation that instantaneously glazed past all of his body, momentarily unnerving his vanes to his blood along a gasp cut short by a dizzying event. Even now, him laying on freezing concrete amongst streams of brisk breeze coating over his character, he could barely understand what the smeared, dull colours of existence were, it also being accompanied by a loud, eerie, echoing soundtrack that was sickeningly familiar.

How’d he get out of the alleyway again?

Intense fatigue and hunger taking control of him, he and his attention were uncontrollably, wearily pinned onto the freezing pavement, bordering the edge of breaking out into anew coughing tantrum. The effect of the harsh nighttime atmosphere and moon gradually chilling everything that came in its path to a core made what would normally be clean breaths turn into frigid heaves. Him powerless to stand up for a moment, he took this opportunity to crestfallenly recall that any kind of Chorus Fruit were naturally counterproductive, him not being strong enough to continuously drag himself upwards and to the nearest, cryptic corridor again...and again...and again...

There goes that plan.

Slowly tearing himself upright, he was forced to instinctively groan with amidst a subconscious desire to just randomly teleport back to an alleyway in his vulnerability, his body complaining simultaneously with every significant movement. Then again, the idea of violently teleporting in any kind of similar manner again violated his soul to retaliate even with as much as the thought. His reduction of energy to balance was evidently proven once he used to his advantage a damp window of the building that was fortunately in his precise proximity to support his incompetent figure. He was restrained to roughly settle his right arm on the pane within the fact that his balance was loose to the point of nearly staggering to the ground once again in a blind stumble, evident alongside the wobbling. While his eyes quickly glanced past the reflecting glass, the distinct shading seized the windowpane to glaze a brief hue of light across its obvious shine and slightly wet drizzle inside the mysterious dusk. Though him to pay little to no mind to the environment and more to survival-instinct, the illumination haphazardly snatched his eyes’ attention to the mirror in uneasy interest, not even noticing himself loosely planting his palms on the windowsill to get a better vision at his reflection, him taking a curious gaze, lost in his own lime-green eyes that were intensely

staring

right

back

at

him.

#hidden not isolated c2 #hni c2 #hni #c2 #mcsm fanfic #mcsm fanfiction #mcsm #mcsm soren #hidden not isolated

[chemicalmagecraft]

Foresight is 20/20 Chapter 8

Feb 17

Decided to keep a journal for stuff I'd rather not forget. And maybe for some sort of journal entry interlude or something?

Feb 19

Got the stuff for Gaara's seal today. Also got some other stuff too, but I'm going to be working on my demon gem project for the next two months or so, so I probably won't be looking over those until after fixing Gaara. Probably bad form to work on more than one other project at a time...

Checked the Inner Demon Calming Seal Kazekage sent me. Regulator's working fine, so it was lack of actual use that caused it to absorb more red chakra. I'd say it filled the other seal up about sixty percent at three times the absorbed chakra, so I should need about two more. Assuming nobody screws up any of the seals. Might end up needing to siphon some chakra from Gaara.

Talked with Kurama. Apparently the issue is less with Gaara's seal and more with Shukaku's aggressiveness and chakra control. Apparently Shukaku has the most control out of any of the biju on account of having one tail. And he also trains his chakra control or something? So that's gonna be a nightmare. Probably gonna need to make a self-repairing seal. Maybe different modes?

Feb 24

FINALLY! I finally got my hacked senjutsu almost working! I might not be able to use it in a non-sneak attack fight, but at least I don't have to wait an hour to do stuff with it. Plus I shouldn't have to wait at all to assimilate singular insects into the incomplete demon gem, at least if I wait a bit between uses at first. Now I just need to get a massive amount of bugs to sacrifice. Why didn't they use animals for philosopher stones in FMA? They have souls and people already slaughter cows. Actually could I use animals for the Edo Tensei sacrifice? It already reshapes the body... Should ask Kurama the rules on that. Where was I?

Right, I should probably actually start working on Gaara's seal. I was kind of paid in advance...

Feb 25

If I don't get some help with this I'm going to start to hate fuinjutsu and that would be bad. How else am I going to learn how to teleport? I don't think that the Shoraigan bends space-time that much...

Right, Kurama's willing to help. And judging from how Ai was able to keep up with me when I was telling her how to do the Inventory Hotbar Seal and even offered suggestions whereas Tenko lost us immediately, she might just be a good addition to Seal Team. And her being on Seal Team might inspire Tenten and Naruto to learn fuinjutsu...

On another note, apparently I can use animals for Edo Tensei, but only if what I'm trying to bring back is the same species and I change the formula to work for that animal. Dang.

Feb 26

Seal Team is go, baby! Plus, while I was there I managed to get Naruto to join Tenten in training chakra control by telling him I felt like it could be useful in the future then giving him an over-exaggerated wink. It's almost like he thought I could see the future somehow. Weird. Why would he think that?

Mar 1

Seal team is great. We've started work on a seal to isolate Shukaku from Gaara without hampering his powers.

And speaking of powers, my other project is going well too. I got Neji to join in with bug-collecting, so the demon gem is going real well. Though I did have to drain the demon sage chakra in the Demon Sage Seal on my body to a tag so I wouldn't turn into a fox. It'd be cool if I could reverse it, but alas. The second stage symptoms of crystallization and/or petrification were also a little scary. I mean, it's cool when I do it to my enemies/victims, but not on me.

Mar 9

Got another tag from Kazekage. Useful data.

Eighty percent.

Mar 14

Completed first demon gem. Hopefully the next one will be faster. The bugs keep coming to it. Almost like they're drawn to the natural energy.

Mar 18

We're done with the general structure of the seal. Will begin testing soon.

Starting on making a demon sage tag for Ai. This will be fun.

Mar 23

Seal still in progress. Looking good though.

Got another from Kazekage. Seal complete. Beginning integration.

Mar 24

Integration complete. Took longer than I thought.

Now I just have to figure out how to use it.

Apr 1

I͚͙̦̰ ͖̹a̕m̢̞̐̕͢ ̷͟b͍̬̙͕̯͉͉͈ͣ̿̓̎̑ͩ̚̚ẹ̯̠̙̼͕̯̟̭̪̃ͦ̒ͫ̎͐͋̈́͛͐ć͔͓͔̝̱̺̞̇ͬ͋̈ͩ̓o̸͗̋̆̑̊͆́̋̅ͦ̀҉͚͎͕̗̥̻͚̼̻̱̻m̤̝͉̫͔̭̰̗̣̥ͧ͑ͦ͋̔̈ͨͮͭ̃̇͜ͅe ̝̜ͩͧD̬͉̯̭̭̹̬̖͍̹̜̮͇͕̩e̩̼͓͙̩̖̝a̴҉̜͉̭̲̤ť̷̠̙͇͍̦̺̘̰̹͙͕̜̋̋͛̄̽ͬ̾̿̓́̚h̰̹͔͖͕͙̪̥͕̯,̥̫̱̖̝̳̠͉͐ͤ̈́ͥ̓̐̎͆͘ ̵̤̫̠͎̹̯̳̮̖̱͟d͎̬̥́͞͡e̢̊ͦ̍̔̔͗̈́ͭ͌̉ͫ̆̎s̶̢̱̺̗̦͓̻̈̈ͪͯͩͮ̀tͦ͆̀̾̃ͧ̾ͯ́̑҉̷̣̰̬̰̘̜͓͙͕́ͅr͞҉͚͝o̱̺̲̩̰͔̫̲̩̠͈̊̎ͤ͑̎̋̂ͨ̄ͤ̋̚ͅȳ͇͚̣͍̜̞̭̤̠ͩ͒ͬ̔ͥ̅̑͒è̢̙͍̻͖͖̣̗̞̥͍̕ͅŗ̵͋͒ ̶̭̼͎̤̰̗̦̥̬͕̖̕o̵̳̯̻͓͎͔̍ͯͦͩ̿ͫf͇̪̪̉͛̍ ̢̡͖͚͇̪̦̹͇̿́̅͗͋̃͂ͬ͠ͅw̱̜͍͍̩̲͔͚̱̮͒̓͐̊̽͆̊͌̅͆͘͟o͈̙̩r̢̡̦̙̙͎̭̘̘̤͚̦̭͔̐̃͌͗̓̃ͭͫ̿̽̂̄͟l̸̋̈́̒̂̌̎ͥ̚̕d̛͞͏̻͚͕̱̠͉͈̺̤̻̠̞͔͍ş̸̦̱̤͙͔̣̼̮̮̜͂ͤ̒ͨ̾͒͑̊̿ͦͨ́ͅ.͎̩̭̫̣̏͛̽̚̚͞

That was murder on my wrist... Happy April Fools!

Right, so that was because I figured out how to use magnet release with red chakra. Can't do much with it yet, but I can use it. I'm floating a senbon as I write this!

Apr 2

Tried to reason with Shukaku. Never doing that again. On the plus side I confirmed that I can use any source of red chakra of the biju I've acquired to extend my telepathic range.

Apr 3

Second demon gem almost done. I also think I realized how Power of the White Snake works. From what it does to its users, it seems like it takes advantage of natural energy overload, much like how the demon gems work. Probably why Kabuto was so sure only White Snake Sages could use Muki Tensei.

Lightbulb.

Apr 7

Gem done. Idea works. Fun times.

Apr 11

The seal is done. Well, as done as it can be without looking over Gaara.

Talked to Hokage. Kazekage's sending over an escort. Well, I did it two days ago because I foresaw needing to talk to the Hokage about having the Kazekage send over an escort. Future vision is fun.

kukukuku~

A twenty-something-year-old Baki walked into the office of the Hokage. For it was he who was given the honor to help escort this enigmatic master of fuinjutsu from their home of Konohagakure no Sato to his home village to fix the seal of the jinchuriki. Just two months ago, this mystery had offered their services through the Hokage and added in a seemingly miraculous seal for a temporary measure that could have even worked as a permanent solution. All they asked for was a few jutsu in return. Baki had practically jumped at the opportunity to see just what kind of person this seal master was when the Kazekage had offered him the mission. "I am here to accept my mission, Hokage-sama," he said with a bow. "Where is the one I am to escort to my village?"

The Hokage sighed. "He's... behind you..." He seemed to be slightly annoyed by what he said.

Baki turned around to see that a small child in almost all white, with a short-sleeved shirt and shorts, plus white arm and leg warmers for some reason, had appeared from the shadows behind him. The only two articles of clothing that weren't white were a pair of red crystal "earrings" that seemed to have no connecting point to his ears and were just floating under the earlobes, without even having holes for them, and sunglasses perched on the child's long, curly brown hair. "Sup," I said. By the way, that's me. I was describing me. "Your name is Baki, right?"

He just stared at me for a bit, face completely unchanged, before turning back to Saru and saying, "No, seriously."

The Hokage sighed again. "I know, but he is indeed the one you are looking for."

Baki slowly turned back to face me. "Aren't you... a little young to be a seal master?"

I internally laughed at the opportunity to make the joke. "Yes, yes I am."

"How?"

I shrugged. "I'd like to think that I'm a genius, but honestly about half of it is just the fact that I don't need to sleep every day and I only really socialize with my friends about as many days as I sleep."

He stared at me. "Are you okay?"

"I said I don't need to sleep, not that I don't sleep." I traced a finger over one of my eye markings and prepared to give the explanation we'd prepared for my other Kekkei Genkai powers for those not in the know. "Kekkei Genkai-type mutation, Nocturne." Just because the power's a fabrication doesn't mean it can't have a classy name. Plus it's listed as that in non-classified documents. "Imagine the legendary stamina of the Uzumaki, but with the mind instead of the body. I also have slightly increased sensitivity to light, which is why I have the glasses, and the ability to generate light from the white dots under my eyes. It makes nighttime studying easy and sleeping any more than one out of four days a waste of time."

Baki took that in for a moment. "Not a power that seems readily useful in battle, but the things I could accomplish with just one night a week..."

I nodded. "And because of my special interest in biju and some other factors, I am perhaps the one human who knows the most about that particular subject, which includes their sealing. Hyuuga Kouki."

"A pleasure. I was told that there was a shinobi from here that will be joining us?"

"He's almost here," I confirmed.

The door burst open, permitting a green-wearing young adult. "I AM HERE!" he exclaimed.

"Maito Gai," I introduced. "He might look and act like a total weirdo, but he's probably the best taijutsu user in Konoha. Thanks for protecting me, Maito-san."

He gave me his trademark twinkly-smile-and-thumbs-up and said, "Please, just call me Gai!" He turned to Baki. "And that goes for you too, my comrade from Suna!"

"Nice to meet you, I'm Baki," the man replied after a moment of confusion.

Saru cleared his throat. "Right, Baki and Gai. Your mission is to escort Kouki-kun here to Sunagakure so he can perform services he has promised to the Kazekage, and escort him back when he is done. While Baki must defer to Kazekage-sama while in his village, you are to ensure that no harm befalls Kouki-kun. Good luck."

kukukuku~

I held on to my parasol as tight as possible as Gai jumped from tree to tree with me on his back. What? It's not like I can keep up with two adult ninja... "If you don't mind me asking, Hyuuga-san, have you looked over the jutsu scrolls Kazekage-sama sent you?" Baki asked me. "I know most of them, so I will be able to answer any questions you should have about them."

"First, I'm fine with you calling me Kouki." Honestly being called 'Hyuuga-san' felt really weird... "Second, I was only comfortable taking on one other project while I was working on Gaara's problem because it wasn't just for me, and I'd already picked up a pretty massive project." I pulled one of the scrolls from my seals. "I've got them on me, though."

"How did you do that?" he asked.

"Seal master."

"Ah. Do you at least have prior experience in wind release?" he asked me. I replied by raising a finger and flashing a Dragon Claw. "That's impressive. That jutsu looks like it'll translate well to some of the jutsu in the scrolls." We talked about the wind jutsu in the scrolls and some other wind release-related stuff, though I wasn't able to put much of my new knowledge into practice because of my awkward position riding on Gai's back. Most of the jutsu were of the cutting type, but there were also a few of the strike and gust types. Those are my own terms for them, by the way. They weren't sorted into any type or anything. It was all pretty enlightening, though, and I managed to test out an idea for a wind release jutsu that I'd had for a while. And sheared a branch off a tree we were passing by.

After a while, though, I felt something in our path. "Stop." I said. Apparently we were getting close to Kaze no Kuni at that point, so the trees were getting more sparse. Gai dropped to the ground to let me off, with Baki following his lead despite not having a Kouki to drop off. I'd offered to make him one so he wouldn't feel left out, but for some reason he didn't want it. Said it was creepy or something. So anyway, after I dropped off of Gai, I said, "So just to clarify, if we meet and get attacked by bandits they're probably going to have to die, right?"

"Why do you want to know that?" Baki asked me suspiciously.

"Hey, you guys!" a rough-looking man holding a chokuto that looked suspiciously like Sasuke's said after popping out from behind a tree. "You're gonna have to pay a toll if you wanna get through here!"

Baki and Gai started to move, but I raised my hand in that in 'stop' command. "What happens if we don't?" I asked evenly.

He laughed and four other men with various weapons emerged from the scenery and they all walked closer to us. Within my throwing range, at least. "Well then we're gonna have to kill you, little man. You may be a kid, but we don't really care all that much, do we boys?"

One of the bandits, a bit of a dopey-looking guy holding a spear, raised his hand and said, "Actually, I kinda do. Feels a little wrong."

The leader sighed loudly. "Well the rest of us ain't little chickens. Right, boys?" The boys in question all gave some kind of affirmation and in the same breath mocked the spear-wielder. "Fuck off, Takehiko. We'll handle this." Takehiko walked off dejectedly, though he hid behind a tree. Loyalty, I guess. "Right, so we might let you off easy if you give us those fancy little earrings you have there. They might fetch a pretty penny."

"You can't expect him to just give them up!" Gai shouted. I shrugged, took them off, and tossed them at the bandits. They landed on the ground near them. "Why!?" Gai asked.

I smirked and made a totally superfluous half ram seal. "False Sage Art: Akuma Tensei," I intoned. The ground around the demon gems shifted and softened, making the bandits sink in slightly. The softened ground rose up, further engulfing the bandits as the mounds of earth reshaped into blob monsters. "That's why."

"Hah!" the leader chortled. "You wouldn't be lookin' so smug if you didn't have these freaky monsters on your side! Let me out and face me like a man! No cheap tricks!"

I gave him a flat look. "First, not that you'd know, but the jutsu I'm using on you involves the use of yin-yang release, red chakra, and sage chakra. That's like three-fourths of what the repertoire of the Sage of Six Paths was at the height of his power. That 'cheap trick' is the culmination of months of hard work and is an A-rank jutsu at least. Second, you are asking a small child to fight you on equal footing. You realize this, right?"

"Yeah! I'll kill you!"

I sighed and snapped my fingers. The earth shifted so that the man was ejected from the monster. "You do realize that you're gonna die, right?" I asked as I shifted my glasses onto my eyes. He started charging at me, but his sword swing hit air. "That's not going to work," I told him from his side, wisps of red chakra curling off of my body. I took a moment to smile at the sight. I was pretty sure that me radiating was the first step of forming a tailed cloak, which was awesome.

He tried to punch me in the face, but I effortlessly dodged again, reaching his back. I struck him with a single pseudo-Juken strike to the Gate of Pain. I am a Hyuuga, after all. He dropped his sword and hunched over in pain from the corrosive effects of the chakra that I just pumped directly into one of his eight inner gates. And of course, he collapsed like a puppet with its strings cut a few moments later when the damage spread to his spinal cord or something. "Right, so that's why you don't fight someone confirmed to have red chakra unless you're jonin or higher," I commented as I cut off the red chakra and lifted my sunglasses, timing it so that my eyes changed back to normal the moment after my eyes were visible. "What's the verdict on killing again, Baki?"

He took a few moments to remember that oh yeah, I asked him a question. "They'd have to die eventually. If you can't do it, I'm fine taking them out for you."

"Thanks, but that won't be necessary," I said, then made an ox seal, calming my mind to try and not freak out about what I was about to do. "I probably won't be able to get this much raw material again for a while." I took a moment to look over their memories to see if they really deserved to die. Disgusted by what I saw, I continued, drawing natural energy into the red chakra within the leader's body while also ordering the demon gems to convert the others. All three of them, much like the hundreds of insects before them, compressed in on themselves and turned into red crystal, though when they were they looked more like they were going through Orochimaru's Curse Seal transformation instead of a second stage chakra cloak.

When the process was done, all three of them had turned into three demon gems each. With a mental command, all nine floated over to me, taking their weapons with them. I sealed the chokuto, kama, and axe the bandits had wielded away and placed one gem each under each of my arm and leg warmers, one each under my sleeves and pant legs, then placed the ninth back on my sternum. Finally, I put the magical earrings back 'on' my ears. "And I suggest you quit this life before something like that happens to you," I said in the general direction of that one Takehiko guy. He bravely ran away away like a brave Sir Robin.

"Was... was that how you made the other two?" Baki asked me nervously.

I shrugged and licked my lips. "Yes and no. I used almost exclusively insects to make them. But I do need live animals of to make demon sage cores." I looked up at the dusky sky. "If you two are tired we could stop for the night."

kukukuku~

I licked my lips as I lightly warmed my marshmallow over the fire. S'mores are amazing. Baki stared at me in bewilderment. "Why..." he started to ask before trailing off.

"Hmm?" I asked. One of the owls on my shoulder hooted. "Are you referring to my fine, feathery friends?"

"Yes, why are there birds roosting on you?"

I patted one of the owls on the head with my free hand. It hooted comfortably. "I don't really know why, but it seems like birds and other animals are attracted to sage chakra, which is in my demon gems."

"I suppose that that makes sense. So what was that you said about having the powers of the Sage of Six Paths?" Baki asked.

"Technically yes, but on paper only," I explained, then unsealed the other ingredients of the s'more. "Saying that I have the power of the Sage is like saying a genin has the power of the Raikage because he knows one lightning jutsu." I thought for a moment as I took a bite of my s'more. "Actually," I said after I swallowed, "it's more like saying I was like whatever Kage-level ninja is best known for wind release back a month or so ago when I only knew two weak wind jutsu solely based on my ability to use a basic, home-brewed wind jutsu or two."

"The fact that you have developed that ability, even as weak as it is, is amazing!" Gai said, giving me a thumbs-up.

"Thanks," I said and gave him a little smile. "Hey, I don't suppose you could give me some pointers about taijutsu?" I asked.

"Your youthful power is already impressive for one of your age. I'm not sure what I could tell you to improve your abilities."

I sighed. "That's only if I use a draining power boost. Without it, I'm only barely stronger than your average little kid." I grinned. "Plus, I'm pretty sure it's multiplicative and not additive. If I up my base abilities, then the power-up will be way more effective."

He grinned. "In that case I will teach you what you need to know to have the power of your youth explode!" We then proceeded to have a long talk about fitness and youth until I put him to bed because he was tuckered out.

#fanfiction #naruto fanfiction #naruto #Foresight is 20/20 #F20 CH8 #minor body horror #i think

[borhapimagines]

imagine: crisis.-P

pairing: ben x reader

word count: 2,184

summary: the morning feels strange on the set of bohemian rhapsody, and an unimaginable crisis is in store.

warnings: mentions of guns+shooting. no graphic descriptions.

quick a/n: fair warning I spent like 4 hours on this but i didn't proofread it at all. i hope you like it:) i am very aware people are sensitive to this subject, and i made sure nothing was graphic, but if you are sensitive to things like this, proceed with caution.  

10:00 AM, Friday

  Walking into work felt strange today. The atmosphere was still. No trace of wind in the air. It was the middle of November in London. The only thing you could count on was wind. Nothing had happened. Everyone was acting almost normal, but everything around you seemed more muted, like everyone was talking quieter. You figured that your mind was just playing tricks on you. With the cold you’d had this week, it would make sense. Everything’s a little more foggy when you’re under the weather.

  Still, your typically energetic, buzzing work environment felt hushed. Trying to brush it off, you quickly headed to the stage, where you knew the boys were. You figured the weird feeling in your stomach would pass once you made some human interaction. Boots clacking onto the stage, your presence was made known. Waving at the boys with a smile, Joe, Gwil,  Rami,  and Ben turned to you excitedly.

  “Y/N!”, Joe exclaimed humorusly.

   You laughed in response. If someone could destroy a serious, dark vibe with one word, it would be Joe.

    You and the boys had really become like a family. At 21, you felt like you had four big brothers on set - or, three. You were nervous to admit to anyone but yourself that you had held a special place in your heart for Ben. Initially, you were drawn to his strong, yet warm presence. You felt a strange sense of safety when you were with him. Not that you felt unsafe with the other boys. Being around Ben was just different. It was like a halo surrounded you when you were together, like you were untouchable.

     Wanting to keep up the light mood, you were quick to joke.      “Oh Gwil, doesn’t your hair just look lovely as always. I seriously think you should consider wearing that wig forever.”

      Rami chuckled at that. Being the cheekiest of the group, you could always count on Rami to poke fun at you,  or at least laugh when someone beat him to it.

       Ben stayed quiet for much of the small talk and banter within the group. It wasn’t typical of him to over-share anyway, but something felt strange today. He would usually at least laugh along or drop a silly “mate” every once in a while. Wondering what was wrong, but not wanting to press the issue, you decided to change the subject to a more work-related discussion. Although it was so much fun, you could hardly call it work. You couldn’t lie, helping a group of handsome men learn to play instruments came with lots of fun.

       “So, which one of  you needs the most work today?”, you inquired sarcastically.

       “I’ll admit it. It’s absolutely me. This guitar solo is ridiculous. It’s times like these that I remember I’m not Brian May”, Gwil announces.

        “It’s true. He’s been playing the same wrong chords for two hours”, Rami jokes.

         Agreeing to help Gwil first, you send the boys off to disperse and practice their various instruments individually. Gwilym was your sole romantic confidant. He was the only person you ever dared to tell about Ben. Mature and a good listener, Gwil was the best person to talk to. Hoping to maybe get some information about Ben’s unexplained mood and let some things off your chest, you were secretly happy he needed extra help today.

          “Alright, hit me. What’s the song?”

      “Don’t Stop Me Now.”

     You made a face. “Oh, hell. I didn’t even know you needed to learn that. You are indeed in a tough situation.”

       “Tell me about it.”

        The two of you laughed, and Gwil could sense your hesitation to start actual practice. Knowing you, he understood you had a personal matter to divulge with him. He didn’t mind. It was nice having someone to depend on with intimate matters of the heart.

         “Okay, what’s up?”, Gwil asks gently.

         “Has Ben been acting strange today, like quieter, or is just me?”

          Gwil sighs. “It’s not just you. We all kind of noticed. Come to think of it, this whole morning has been strange. We were counting on Joe’s stupid jokes to distract us from it.”

          “It so odd you say that. I got the strangest feeling when I walked onto set this morning. I tried to brush it off, because I’m just coming off of a cold, but now that you say it, I don’t know.

          “Hm” was all Gwilym could think to say. Mutually deciding that they should try their best to shake themselves of these unprescended feelings, they practiced for a little while. You helped for a solid fifteen minutes, but once Gwil understood what he was supposed to be playing, he could practice rather independently. Using this to your advantage, you began to mingle around to the rest of the boys to lend a helping hand. You started with Ben, which you confess was truly just to check up on him on a personal level. Seeing him so somber worried you. You didn’t like that feeling. It always seemed too strong for your heart to handle.

          Approaching his drum set gentley, you spoke.  

          “Hi”, you started simply with a warm smile.

          He looked up at you with joy and radiance, but unexplainable intensity, and slight glimpse of concern.  

           “Oh, Y/N, I’ve been meaning to find you for a little while. Um, not to be weird. Are you, like, okay right now?”

            You hesitated before responding, worrying that his concern would grow if you admitted the day’s strange aroma.

             “Yeah, I’m feeling fine, just coming off that cold, you know?”,you replied gentley.

             “Okay-okay good.” His tone shifted. Voice growing quiter, he spoke again. “It’s just me being odd, I’m sure. But I’m getting this weird feeling. Like something bad is going to happen. It’s dumb, I can’t explain it.”

               Your entire mood shifted. None of this was in your head, then? Ben’s concern only filled your brain with questions. Why would he be asking you specifically? Why not mention it  to the boys as well? Realizing nothing about this day was normal, you tried to go on with your day as normal. You usually had lots of fun at work. It was in everyone’s best  interest to keep it that way. Counting on Joe to joke your worries away, you actually found the best distraction in Rami. He was so comitted and focused. It forced you to ignore your thoughts.  You truly worked. “Somebody to Love” was sounding rather lovely after your session of practices with Rami.

2:00 PM

       That’s when you heard the first shot. It was rather distant, and when the sound initially registered in everyone’s ears, it was unclear what to make of it. Something heavy could have fallen on the floor.

       The intensity of the situation wasn’t made clear until you felt Ben’s gentle yet strong grip on your wrist. Looking at you directly in the eye, Ben’s presence alone made something click in your mind. That was a gun shot. After what seemed like forever, but was not even a minute, everyone seemed to be on the same page. You, Ben, Joe, Gwilym, and Rami all looked at each other with frightened eyes. Silently understanding the fervor of the situation, the five of you quietly shuffled off the stage, quickly searching for somehwere to  hide. Rami’s quick intelligence let you all to a small room behind the stage that had a door. More importantly, a door that locked. He quietly as possible, turned the handle, and held the door open. After the  four of you made it in, he stood out the door, like he didn’t intend on going inside. You gave him a look, and as soon as he noticed your silent questioning, he whispered.

        “Lucy”.

         That’s when you truly felt your heart beat out of your chest, anxiety quickly making itself known in your chest. People could die. Rami is willing to risk his life to find Lucy on this massive set. He could die.

          Giving him an understanding nod, tears filling your eyes, he smiled soberly at you. As if to say a tentative goodbye. With that, he was off, and the door shut behind him. This left you, Joe, Gwilym, and Ben in the small, dark room. None of you could think of anything to say to each other. You were only able to focus on one thing.

           Ben hadn’t let go of your hand. The two of you were sitting side by side, feet  parallel to eachother. You turned to look at him, and you felt something you had certainly felt before, but hadn’t recognized. Love. Unconditional Love. It was what you were so afraid of. That look in his eyes. The idea that someone could care about you so much. You realized you would have died for him in that moment, and he would have died for you. It was so extremely dangerous.

             Another shot. Closer this time.

           Joe’s previously silent sobs could be heard now. He whispered with anger and confusion through his tears, “Guys, what the fuck is this? This shouldn’t be happening. Why is this happening?” Your soul hurt for him. It always hurts the most to see the ones that smile the most upset.

           Gwil was good in crisis. He successfully calmed Joe down. Tried to reassure us that everything was going to be okay. For some reason though, his calmness made you the most sad. It was like he had accepted his fate. He thought he was going to die today.

           After twenty more minutes of waiting, Gwil and Joe began to drift off. There was nothing anyone could do now. Might as well rest.

           You and Ben couldn’t bring yourselves to sleep. It was like you were staying awake for each other.

            Nobody had said a word since Joe’s brief outburst. Finally, Ben looked and you directly, whispering as quietly as possible.

            “We can’t talk a lot. It’s too loud. But if there’s one thing I get to say to you it’s this. I am not letting you die today.”

            That’s when you truly felt your heart shatter. Not knowing what else to do, you slowly released your hands from his and pulled him in for a hug. As you released from each other, you were inches away. If one of you moved, you would be kissing.

            That’s when you heard the door open. Gwil and Joe shot awake. Three police officers revealed themselves to you and it felt like everyone finally took a deep breath out.

           The four of you were escorted out of the room, and sent outside. It was sunset.

            The London wind had returned.

            Everything felt safe again. One thing that never changed, though, was that halo. That strange halo you felt around Ben.

             Huddling close to each other, You, Ben, Joe, and Gwil walked outside, where you saw police cars everywhere, as well as the cast and crew. Your work family. The people you realized more than ever were so important to you.

             You saw Rami standing to the side of the scene, holding Lucy next to him. Thank God. The four of you raced to the couple, and you all embraced in the tightest, most emotion filled hug any of you had ever had. You were reunited. Everything was normal again.

~

           Nobody dared to walk to their car alone. Everyone brought a partner. Besides, the group decided it would be best to stay together that night. They would all meet at Gwilym’s. Ben walked you to your car. It seemed almost obvious that he would at this point.

           Before you got into your car, you decided it was your turn to brave. Your turn to tell Ben how you felt, since he had practically done so himself.

            Looking into his green eyes, you spoke with no hesitation.

           “I love you.”

            He looked at for a moment, seemingly shocked at your words. You elaborated.

            “If I’ve learned anything today, it’s that we have no idea what could happen. In the strangest of places, on the most normal of days. I don’t know how we all felt it. It doesn’t make sense. The only thing I understand right now is that I love you.”

             He soaked in your words for a moment, and without hesitation, leaned in to kiss you. When your lips touched, it was like they were molded for each other. The kiss was so natural, yet so full of longing, like you had been waiting years to do it. Maybe you had. After a minute or so, your lips parted.

             “I’ve loved you since- I don’t know. I can’t remember a time that I didn’t. I never thought I’d be in a situation like this. I just- I’m now just grateful I was alive to say it.”

               The sincerity and intensity in his voice is what you had fallen in love with. And you knew after what happened today, neither you or Ben would let each other go.

#ben hardy #ben x reader #bohemian rhapsody

[mszegedy]

30 Days of Autism Acceptance 2020: Days 1-10

This is a list of questions by @autie-jake (full list here), where you’re supposed to answer one per day for every day of April. I learned about it a few days into April and intended to start doing it but I forgot, I guess, or maybe decided against it. But I wanna do it now, so here’s the first ten days really quick.

April 1: Introduce yourself. Talk about who you are as a person.

This is kind of a hard question for me. I think my younger sister (by 3¾ years) would say this, if she just made a new friend the same age as her and she asked about me:

“Well, she goes to college, but she’s graduating this semester. She does something with proteins, but honestly she should really be a linguist. I actually really hate discussing linguistics with her, because she gets so annoying and overbearing about it. I don’t understand why she’s doing whatever she is. She’s a pretty weird person. She has all sorts of problems with, like, depression and amnesia and stuff. Oh, but, she’s trans, so, like, that’s a thing, yeah. I don’t like talking about most things with her because she thinks she’s always right. And also, she’s kind of mean to our mom. I don’t know why she does that. But at the same time she’s, like, really sensitive, and will be offended by the stupidest things. Okay, this is making it sound like I don’t like her, but I do, okay? She’s my sister, of course I love her. We’ve bonded a lot. She’s moving to DC in October, so we’ll be able to hang out during the school year, and that’ll be really fun. I think I’m just a little fed up with her right now from having to live with her for a whole month.“

April 2: Post your red instead selfie today! Alternatively, you could talk about why you choose to go redinstead and what it means to you.

I don’t know what “redinstead” is. I googled it and it sounds like you wear differently-themed stuff from what’s recommended by Autism Speaks, to dunk on them. Like a lot of people, I’m stuck inside this April, so there’s no point in me wearing pride clothing, because nobody will see it. But I do disapprove of Autism Speaks, because they don’t treat autistic people like people, and they try to spread that ideology. If you trick them into thinking you’re a person first, they won’t change their mind; instead, they’ll say you’re not autistic. People defend them by recounting the problems that nonverbal autistic people face, as though nonverbal autistic people have an inherently worse neurotype than everyone else, and not just one that’s more difficult to accomodate for society, and as though that justifies the abuses levied against them by Autism Speaks. I could go into details, but I won’t, because it would be emotionally draining for me as a writer, and you as a reader.

Suffice to say, I love being autistic. It has inspired a lot of people to treat me very badly, and probably led to a degree of abuse and neglect in my childhood that resulted in dissociative identity disorder. But all of my autistic traits are things that I love about myself. I like how emotionally expressive my stims make me. I like how I’ve learned to dissect a lot of social stuff and I can explain it. I like how I can just dispense with all of that social stuff around autistic people. Hell, I think it gives the neurotypical people I hang out with some relief, too, when I’m straightforward and explicit all the time. I like how good I am at linguistics, and how I can use it as a way to relate to the world.

April 3: Talk about special interests. Do you have any? What are they? How long have you had them? What does it feel like to have special interests? What does having special interests mean to you? Talk about your past special interests

My special interests are unusually slow burns. I’ve had linguistics-related special interests for the past ten years. They’re peripherally useful for language learning, but mostly I’ve just accumulated academic knowledge. They’ve, however, also led me to reconnect with my Ugric heritage culture, which is very important to me. (It wouldn’t be important to me if language weren’t my primary way of relating to the world; paradox?)

I have a wide variety of other interests, but few of them are really “special”. As a kid, my special interest was marine life. Unfortunately, I haven’t retained much of that, although I do have the privilege of having a diver’s license, which I’ll use again someday when I pass better naked. I also briefly had a special interest in… building computers, or something. I didn’t have the money to make anything particularly powerful (not that I had anything at the time to use computational power for), but I did run some workshops for middle-schoolers.

I think maybe my interest as a kid in Homestuck was special? It ran pretty deep, anyway. It’s hard to say, when you can’t remember most of your life.

April 4: Do you consider your autism to be an important part of your identity?

Because we have DID (or something like it), we don’t have an identity in the traditional sense. We do have a system identity, but that’s built around our mutual goals and guidelines. However, we’d be very sad to lose our autistic traits. Also, it might mess with the standard of consistency we’ve established for ourselves; we might not be able to predict our future actions, because losing our autistic traits may interfere with our ability to follow the aforementioned goals and guidelines, which are what help keep us focused and consistent.

April 5: Talk about your living situation. Do you live with your parents? Do you live on your own? Have roommates? Etc. If you live on your own how hard was it to get used to?

Right now, I’m quarantining with my mom, my sister, and my brother (who is actually my sister’s boyfriend), at my mom’s house. The mess that’s accumulating in the house is slowly causing my mom more and more stress, I think. I’ve never really lived on my own. For a lot of college, I lived with roommates or housemates, but I don’t think I was very good at that. Also, my mom lived nearby, and I stayed at her place on the weekends. The closest I’ve come to living on my own is watching my mom’s house for up to a few weeks at a time, and that wasn’t sustainable. (To be fair, what kind of house has a lawn? When I get a house with a lawn in the future, I will make sure that it’s a wild lawn that I don’t have to mow.)

The third to last time that I house-sitted for my mom, I ended up getting hospitalized for self-harm. It took her a while to let me do it again after that. Although, not a very long while, I guess. That was at the end of last September.

April 6: Are you able to drive? If you can, was it hard for you to learn? If not, what alternatives do you use, if any

I’m not able to drive. Driving is scary and difficult for me. I went through the motions of learning it in high school, but my track was interrupted by a move across state lines (I lived in the US at the time), and I never recovered. I’ve failed the NJ written driver’s exam, which grants you a one-year permit with restrictions, a total of roughly ten times. I’ve never been this bad at a subject; it’s like I have the opposite of a special interest in driving. A special lack-of-interest. My brain won’t retain any information about NJ driving laws whatsoever. It doesn’t help that I had a traumatic car crash when I was very young.

So far, I’ve just gotten my mom and coworkers to drive me places, or taken Ubers or trains. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that if I leave NJ, I’ll probably have to get a driver’s license. Although, I’ve already got a carpool set up at my next job in October.

April 7: Talk about autism in the media. Do you think that autism is typically portayed well? Badly? Is there anything you’d like to see more of when it comes to autistic representation? Who are your favorite autistic characters? Do you have any headcanons?

The media that I consume doesn’t really have autistic characters, so I can’t comment on how autistic people are portrayed, except that I’d like us to be portrayed more, period. I’ve only really seen us in teen dramas. To be fair, one of my favorite webcomics, El Goonish Shive, is a teen drama, and has a great autistic character (Susan). I’d say I identify with her, but not really. It’s very hard for me to identify with people, fictional or nonfictional, because my neurotype is greatly influenced by autism, DID, chronic depression, and gender dysphoria, and you don’t see combinations of traits in media that come even close to that.

Speaking of another teen drama, I wish I were half as cool as Matilda from Everything’s Gonna Be Okay. I guess that makes her my favorite canon autistic character, but that’s pretty easy, because I don’t know any other ones. I can’t say that I wanna hug her, because she doesn’t like that, but her general substitute for hugs is dancing, and I can’t dance. I guess I’d learn how, to show my appreciation for her.

Archer from Archer is probably autistic. I like him a lot.

April 8: What are some misconceptions/stereotypes about autism that you hate?

“Hating” is not something I can really do, even when it’s recommended to do it. I haven’t been open about my autism, so I haven’t been exposed to too many misconceptions or stereotypes about it firsthand, anyway. I guess if I had to pick, it would be whatever made my dad call me autistic as an insult and use a bunch of ableist slurs at me a whole lot. I don’t know how he understands autism, however. He doesn’t seem to realize that he has it himself. (It’s not usually one’s place to diagnose other people like that, but one of the most degrading things that my mom says to me very often is that I’m exactly like my father. He even has some traits that I don’t, like touch-aversion and samefoods.)

April 9: How sensitive are you when it comes to touch? Are you pro hug or anti hug?

I’m hyposensitive. I’m really losing it here under this quarantine. I had a girlfriend who always made me feel so respected whenever she responded to my touch-based needs, by squeezing me, hugging me, or otherwise cuddling me very tight, but then she broke up with me because of my mental health issues, and because her parents hated me and her friends were made very uncomfortable by me.

April 10: Do you have trouble understanding when someone is being sarcastic or joking?

It depends. I think I’m as good at it as I’ll ever be, and my false negative rate is under 0.5 (and my false positive rate is very low, but not 0). But I don’t think the same thing goes on in my head as in neurotypical people’s heads when I determine something to be a joke. I almost explicitly do a Bayesian calculation; “Based on what I know about this person and this context, how well can I imagine them meaning this statement unironically in this context? How well can I imagine them meaning this statement ironically in this context?” It’s pretty automatic now, but sometimes it doesn’t work very well, when I’m not so familiar with the person and/or the context, and occasionally the intended interpretation of the statement.

#2020 #30daysofautismacceptance

[proxylynn]

Underfell: File Name not Edgy Enough #24

Chapter 24: Drama

WARNING: I WANT NO RESPONSIBILITY OVER SPOILING THINGS FOR OTHERS. THAT BEING SAID, THIS IS HOW FILE NAME NOT FOUND WOULD FUNCTION IN THE AU OF UNDERFELL. BEFORE YOU READ THIS, UNLIKE THE NICE TIME OF UNDERTALE, THIS WORLD IS KILL OR BE KILLED. THIS STORY WILL BE GRAPHIC, GORY, USE SWEARS LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS, AND DEAL WITH SENSITIVE SUBJECT MATTERS. FOR EXAMPLE, THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE READ THE FILE NAME RELOCATED SPOOF WILL KNOW HOW I PICTURE THIS VERSION OF LYNSIE COMING TO THE UNDERGROUND. IT IS NOT AN ACCIDENT. IT IS NOT BECAUSE OF SOMETHING DUMB. IT IS BECAUSE SHE CHOOSES TO END HER LIFE. SO TAKE THIS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. I MADE IT BECAUSE I NEEDED TO LET SOME OF THIS EDGINESS OUT OF MYSELF. WHICH I GUESS MAKES UNDERFELL LYNSIE EVEN MORE TRUE TO WHO I REALLY AM. ANYWAY, ENJOY. ^_^

You know...I used to love darkness. It was the one element that felt the most kind to me. Now it's a different story. At this point I hate it. Nothing good comes when I'm in darkness anymore. If I'm not dreaming then I'm being used by a maniacal scientist as his personal experiment.

{What are you doing here?}

Or this crap happens.

"Seeing as I don't get a choice in these matters, I should be asking you that. So...Why am I here, Chara?"

{Go away.}

"Why so serious? You've been avoiding me like the plague."

{You've been listening to Gaster behind my back.}

I sigh.

"Are we really about to do this?"

{Do what?}

"A childish back and forth of 'how could you do this' b.s."

{I warned you not to trust him. And what do you do? You cut deals with him.}

"You've been rummaging in my head. Not very nice of you, bro."

{Don't call me bro. Family doesn't backstab family.}

"Heh...You've been dead so long you forget what humanity is like. And I didn't backstab anyone."

{Yes you did!}

"How? How does seeking aid from the best source of soul knowledge so I don't go kill-crazy backstab you or the family?"

{That's not the point! You didn't listen to me! Why doesn't anyone ever listen to me?!}

Where is this coming from?

"Dude, calm down. You're a kid. A dead kid. You should be used to no one listening."

The darkness rumbles with thunder. Energy swirls around like wind or unseen water. A form begins to take shape, distinctly that of a male child. The boy is pale-skinned, has bright pink cheeks, piercing red eyes, as well as light brown hair, and dressed in a red sweater with a black stripe across the middle, black pants, and brown boots. This is Chara...at least...Chara pre-death. And oddly he's intimidating.

{I am so sick and tired of people not listening to me.}

"*scoff* Join the club, kid. You really think I ended up here because others heard what I had to say? You can't expect me to ignore help because you tell me no. It's MY soul. MY problems. And I will deal with them MY way. Not anyone else's."

The energy gets stronger. It's starting to become visible as it clashes around him.

{Not again...I won't let it happen again...}

I don't like the looks of this. But what can I do about it? It's not like I have power here.

"Look, I'm sorry if I piss you off. I have an annoying tendency to do that. It's not intentional. I..."

{I won't let you kill Asriel again!}

Confusion seems to be my normal state of mind these days. Does he actually mean me? Is he having a moment like Sans and thinks I'm Frisk? Could he even be thinking of Gaster? Or is he calling out all the other past humans to fall before me? Either way, I'm not going to get through to him. The look in those eyes of his gives me the message loud and clear. Talking is pointless. Now I'm left to do the one move I've done all my life...brace for impact.

{Not again! NEVER AGAIN!}

As expected, his rage causes the energy to lash out at me and all I can do block. Damn things cut like knives. I can't tell if bleeding is possible here but it feels like it.

"*mutter* Geez...And I thought I had issues. *grunt* No one is out to kill Asriel! Calm down!"

He doesn't say a word. Yet the energy intensifies. Hitting harder. Pushing back. Pushing me away.

"*strained* Do you think this solves anything? That lashing out at me keeps him safe? Harming me only puts him in more danger!"

Again, he's not in a mood to listen. The energy is cutting away at me more. I won't be able to take it much longer at this rate.

"*snarl* Damn it, Chara! Don't be like Toriel and put your problems on me like it's my fault!"

For only a moment there's a break in his attack and I think that maybe...just maybe...maybe he sees that this isn't the right way of handling the situation. This hope is dashed when he suddenly rushes me and grabs my shirt. The look he has. So spiteful. It breaks my guard.

{If we're really family...You won't come back here again.}

He blasts me at point-blank range and everything flashes from black, red, and then white.

"*gasp and cough*"

God, I hate this shit. Each time I wake up I feel closer to dying. Like one day, I'll open my eyes but be unable to breathe or I won't wake up at all.

"Bad dream?"

...Or I'll wake up in an unknown place with lord only knows who.

"With the wack you took, a little nightmare is the best outcome you could've gotten. Though we still can't rule out brain damage quiet yet."

I can't see anything apart from the ceiling. A brace of some sort is restraining my head. I can feel bands on my wrists and ankles. And something else...something cold.

"Hmmm...Vitals look stable. Then again, it's been a long time since I've had to human hooked to this thing. Oh well."

Great. From bad to worse.

"Not a big talker, huh? Or are you just slow to take in what's going on?"

I am in no mood for this crap.

"In any case, the short version is you're now in Hotland. No one knows you're here. And if you ever want to go home, it's best that you cooperate."

The sigh that leaves me is one oozing with boredom. I'm numb to this. I've been here too long to care.

"You're taking this oddly well, human."

"I'm in no position to care. I'm restrained in a place I don't know. You already have points on me I can't bounce back from. So why not skip the spiel and be blunt. It'll be easier on us both."

There's a scribbling noise.

"Subject is reasonable yet bitchy after having woken up."

Okay...Now I have some clue.

"You're Alphys, right?"

By the sudden startle that shakes her, she wasn't expecting me to know.

"H-H-How do you...?"

"People talk. It's not like there are others down here that know what a human is and have done things to them before. Makes for a very select list of names."

She huffs through her nose.

"Perhaps you'll be of more interest than your predecessors after all. Aside from your soul that is."

She taps on something and it makes me snarl in discomfort. No wild guess needed that it's my soul.

"You're a first. I've never seen a human soul infused with magic before. Though it is funny how it can be afflicted with something so common to growing children and you are...clearly not one."

I try to not think about that stupid issue of soul puberty.

"Yeah, well...What can do? Stuff happens."

"Lucky for you...it's a condition that is easily fixed with some stabilizing magic. You might be able to feel it. It's rather cold. Much like everything else in this world."

So that's another mystery solved. I'm basically getting the equivalent to hormone balancers. The question...Why?

"Seems a little odd."

"How so?"

"No offense, but experience has taught me that no one does something for someone else down here without there being a reason. So spill it, doc. What reason could you have for treating my condition?"

There's a sigh and a loud click before the slab I'm on begins to move, slanting me to almost stand. Now I can see the room better, the machinery, the odd patch on my exposed purple soul, and her. A slightly corpulent reptile-monster that appears smaller than she is due to slouching. She has yellow skin/scales, wears spiral-shaped glasses, a red and black striped sweater with a matching black skirt, and topped off with a classic white lab coat with a few frayed ends.

"If you must know...He insisted on you being fully healed. I swear things would be more interesting if I didn't fix you. But no...he was going to annoy the piss out of me. And frankly, I'm not in the mood to tear him apart for scrap."

He? Oh...Him.

"Ah, I see. Mettaton is a crafty guy. Must be his inner ghost."

She gives me a questionable look.

"Why would you say that?"

"Because I know his cousin and he told me."

She groans and adjusts her glasses with her middle finger.

"That information is not for the public to know. You'd be wise not to spread any rumors about it."

"*scoff* Please. If I haven't blabbed by now than I ain't blabbing ever. Besides...There's no point telling anyone anyway."

She scribbles on a pad.

"You'd be wise to keep that mentality."

I roll my eyes.

"So where is he? Dude went so far as to have his flunky give me my second bat to skull injury and drag me here, the least he could do is show himself before overly explaining some elaborate plan."

She stops writing to look at me.

"HE is getting himself and I quote 'ready to shine like the star he was born to be' end quote."

If ego was hot air that metal body of his would be floating like a parade balloon.

"But what you said makes me wonder. You've watched his shows before, haven't you?"

"Enough to notice predictable patterns. Sure, the first show is fresh. But then he repeats the same theme in every show the rest of the day. It's hard not to notice."

"Like he tries too hard and looks like a moron."

"I wouldn't say that. It's endearing that he tries when it comes to an idea he likes. Whether or not the audience likes that sort of thing is subjective. You can't please all the people all of the time. Only some people some times."

"Try none and ever. Ratings have been in the dumper. The only small increase to have happened was that time he tricked you into phoning in. Heh...I still can't believe that worked."

"I'm not heartless. I don't want to see anyone hurt or die if I can help it."

She goes back to scribbling.

"Subject is a bleeding heart idiot."

I struggle to shake my head.

"Not the first time I've heard that and it won't be the last. Yet you can't honestly tell yourself that there isn't at least one person you'd risk it all for."

She pauses. Her scribbling stops to tap the pad. But this is not a long pause before she resumes again.

"Side note...If the subject is this stupid, how has it lived this long and what does that mean for surface humans?"

I can't roll my eyes hard enough.

"So you'd do anything for that fire elemental, huh?"

This has my attention.

"It's one thing to associate with monsters. Most are ignorant of what a human is. Making it easy to blend in and not be killed. But to be romantic with a monster? And to have been so dumb as to do so in public no less? That's just begging for trouble."

My glare has her smirking.

"Be a real shame if something unfortunate were to happen to him."

"You do not want to go down this road. Not on those tires."

"You are in no position to stop me if I do."

"Trust me, doc. You don't want to make me angry. Bad things happen when I snap."

My seriousness is not taken seriously.

"I'll be sure to enjoy studying every moment of it."

I sneer daggers at her.

"Humans are such pathetic and pitiful creatures."

"And yet we won the war. Go figure."

That earns me a very nasty look.

"I think you need to learn your place, human."

"I'm strapped to a table. I think I know my place."

"Let's double-check that..."

She reaches into her pocket and suddenly I'm thrashing harshly as electricity is sent shooting into me. After the longest five seconds ever, it stops. I'm left panting through my teeth and smoking faintly.

"Seems your tolerance is stronger than expected. Still...that should be enough to remind you to behave. Right, human?"

I want to defy her. I know I can. But the situation is not favoring me. She holds the power and knows it.

"*huff* Whatever."

She smiles and heads for the doorway.

"This will be interesting. That much is sure."

The door closes behind her and I sigh. Is it wrong that I miss the days of Papyrus beating me? Fuck my life. Okay...Time to make a plan.

[Meanwhile: The Ruins]

Fear. Fear is laced on the wind. Paternal fear of a mother for her child. When Toriel's voice was met by silence alarms went off. When she found the doors open when last she had shut them panic sank in. Her child's belongings were left behind, including the flower called brother. And one look at the snow beyond the door only added to her worry. The pristine snow was a disheveled mess. Footprints. In every and all direction. The worst part is the snowfall beginning to fill in the indents.

Searching.

Screaming.

Scanning for any clues as to where her child was. Yet she was lost. Second-guessing which set of tracks were the human's and uncertain if the ones she first picked were indeed the right ones. Scrambling, she picked another set and stuck to it. Swerving and swiveling through trees like dogs along a pole line. These tracks seemed hopeful enough. Stretching further into the distance than previous sets. At the rate she was headed, she would find herself in town and the location of the child would then follow suit. Just a little more. Just a bit further and then the real path shall be clear.

Yet...Why were the trees still constant?

The environment the same?

Where was this going?

...

The bridge.

These tracks made her head back towards home. Never faltering as they beelined for the bottomless pit. No deviation. No hesitation. Just clear forward motion to death. Her heart stopped. Everything stopped. She just stood there. Staring into the abyss. Contemplating just how deep or where it led. Could the human...did she...was this her fate? No...NO! There...There had to be a way to check. The...Oh! The phone! If she was in that pit or not, the ringing of that simple phone will provide her with answers.

[RING...]

She held that object muffled in her paws. Listening to the wind and anything at all.

But there was nothing. Simply the sound of snow landing on the world.

This...gave her hope. Hope touched the monster's soul for the first time in ages. Yet this begged the real question...Where is she? Perhaps some aid to this situation will be necessary. Seems like a visit to the town is in order.

[A cold walk later]

The hour is late. No one is out and about. Except for one. One that has very limited options at her disposal. In all their talks and jokes, Toriel never learned what Sans's house looked like. With a nervous lump in her throat, she approaches the bar and trembles as she knocks on the door of the obviously closed establishment. As one would guess there is no response. So she continues to knock, pressing with her urgency. After about five minutes of the most polite pounding on a door ever, a faint light approaches.

"*grumble* We're closed. Can't you read the sign?"

She ignores the annoyance due to the situation.

"Please, I need your help."

There's a pause. The door clambers open enough to show part of Grillby's face.

"M-Mrs. Dreemurr?"

"Forgive my rudeness. But I must speak to you about Lynsie."

"I didn't mean for it to be so big! It's just a hickey! I didn't hurt her, I swear!"

His defensive words confuse her and this makes the panicked man of flame become shamefully aware.

"You didn't know about that...Did you?"

Her eyes squint in judgmental frustration.

"I did not."

A small snort of steam comes out of her snout. Grillby, feeling like shit is going to end badly, slams the door in fear. Her own fear, overwriting her motherly rage, has her pounding on the door.

"Open this door!"

"I don't want to die!"

"Please! My daughter is missing!"

"...What?"

He opens the door fully now, knowing well the former queen would not lie about such a thing.

"She's missing?"

"Yes. I can not find her. Only footprints from many bodies."

She is surprised by the real concern coming to Grillby's face. He is quick to go for his phone but she shakes her head.

"I have already tried. She does not respond."

"Hmmm...This is sounding like an abduction. Has there been any notice left for you? A note? A call?"

She mopes.

"No. Nothing. I was hoping you might have a clue. Was there anything odd you noticed on your way home?"

He shakes his head.

"Unfortunately, no."

Her heart sinks. Seeing this has Grillby goes into support mode.

"Don't lose hope. We don't have much left. You know her better than I. She's prone to getting into trouble. But you know what?"

"What?"

"I know someone that can help. Just...Let me bundle up. If you can imagine, the cold and I..."

"Understood."

Grillby shuts the door and Toriel waits outside.

[Elsewhere: the Ruins]

"Ugh...my head..."

A dazed and delirious Flowey stirs in the dark confines of a bag. Unzipping a pack from the inside is bad enough, but doing so with leaves for hands is fucking ridiculous. And while hungover to boot. After some time, mixed with muffled swearing, the great escape is complete! The flower is free! Yet...Something is amiss. The bag he was contained in was not in the bedroom as he would have expected and the doors leading outside are wide open. This isn't right. It is time to ditch the pot and sink his roots into the ground to do some stealthy investigating. Covert flower style.

[Meanwhile: in Snowdin]

"Are you certain we will not be bothering them at such a late hour?"

"Don't worry about that, Mrs. Dreemurr. It's part of their job to deal with stuff like this. Plus, you're the Queen and they are in charge of looking after her. If they don't want to go through hell, they'll help."

"I hope so."

Grillby guilds Toriel the out of place house on the edge of town. Of course, they lived in a place like this. Why she expected different she didn't know. The curtains were closed yet glowed with the light of activity still going on inside. Muffled chuckling could be heard behind the walls. She recognized it easily...Sans.

"Sounds like someone's having a good time."

"Is it normal for others to be up still at such an hour?"

"Depends."

"Depends?"

"You know. Reasons. Some can't get these kinds of moments during day hours. Others just can't fall asleep all that well. Him? I think his reason is therapeutic. Ending the day on a laugh to forget all the bad stuff. But that's just my guess."

She pouts as he knocks on the door. Sans's puns when behind the Ruins exit were always on the borderline of being sad, she never thought much of it other than guessing the outside was just terrible. Now, learning more and more, she couldn't dismiss it as easily as before. But such thoughts are broken with the movement of the curtain and door opening seconds later to show the confused skeleton.

"what happened?"

Even with no word said, Sans is smart enough to know that their being here means nothing good.

"She's gone."

Sans's sockets widen.

"...get inside."

Further goading wasn't needed and once inside the door was locked much to the former queen's concern.

"now what do ya mean she's gone?"

"Not getting Papyrus? You know how he gets."

Sans sighs.

"fine...hey, pap! get your ass down here!"

A loud thud bangs the inside of a door upstairs.

"*MUFFLED* I TOLD YOU NOT TO BUG ME!"

"the queen's here! the human's gone!"

Rampant scuffling rushes to a door that is flung wildly open.

"SHE'S WHAT?!"

Toriel fiddles with her fingers.

"My child is missing. I believe someone has taken her."

Now in serious guard mode, Papyrus joins the group.

"ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT SOMEONE HAD THE GALL TO COMIT SUCH A BRAZEN ACT IN MY TERRITORY?!"

"what clues do you have that she didn't just pull a stupid stunt like last time?"

She swallows dryly.

"There were tracks. Lots of them. All scattered about the snow that were not there before. It looked like some person or persons were trying to make it as difficult as possible to distinguish what track lead where."

Papyrus growls lowly.

"SANS, CONFIRM THIS AND SEARCH FOR ANYTHING SHE MIGHT HAVE OVERLOOKED."

Sans nods and teleports out.

"Overlooked? I searched those woods for what felt like ages. I overlooked nothing."

"DO NOT TAKE IT AS AN INSULT. IN SITUATIONS OF PANIC, IT IS EASY TO MISS DETAILS. I AM MERELY CHECKING FOR THE BEST RESULTS. AND, AS LAZY AS MY BROTHER IS, HE HAS SHARP EYES. IF SOMETHING IS AMISS, HE WILL FIND IT."

"Awww..."

Grillby smirks.

"You actually complimented him. Shame he wasn't here to hear it."

Papyrus folds his arms and glares at the elemental.

"AND YOU'RE HERE, WHY?"

Grillby copies his pose except his expression is that of cocky smugness.

"I think any monster worth their dust would be man enough to care about what's happened to their girlfriend. Don't you?"

Papyrus opens his mouth to say a condescending remark but then doesn't due to his mind registering what was just said and putting things together now that it's clear.

"YOU...YOU! YOU'RE THE ONE HAVING THE INAPPROPRIATE RELATIONSHIP WITH THE ENEMY!"

"If you want to put it that way, yes."

"YOU'RE SICK."

"And loving it. What's your point?"

A weird energy could be felt between them as if they had something to say yet weren't, and it was making Toriel feel rather uncomfortable. Though part of her was miffed at Grillby for being too blatant about being with her daughter while she is present.

"YOU KNOW NOTHING GOOD WILL COME FROM MAKING YOURSELF SO VULNERABLE."

Of all the things Papyrus could've said, no one saw that coming. Yet Grillby takes it well.

"I've been spurned before. If it happens again, it won't sting so much."

"THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT."

This had the flaming man sneer and bite his tongue, holding back words that weren't ready to be said at this moment. Papyrus turns his attention to Toriel and she flinches.

"I NEED YOU TO TELL ME EVERYTHING."

She nods.

"Understood."

[Elsewhere: Snowdin forest]

The old lady wasn't kidding. The path outside of the Ruins looked like the frenzy made on kids the last day of school. The only difference was these tracks were randomly deliberate. Whoever made these wanted them to be seen. Not a thing normal folk do around here unless goading others into a trap. Following them would be pointless. They likely only go where they wanted them to go and covered up the real tracks. Bastard smugglers. They know what they're doing. Though someone was a little sloppy. A few stray drops of blood dot the tread of a couple of tracks. Who told them about a human being down here?

[RING]

Must be Papyrus. Maybe Toriel shared something helpful.

"sup."

"WHAT HAVE YOU FOUND SO FAR?"

Guess she didn't say much.

"not a lot. but from what's here, it looks like the work of the body snatchers."

"IN SNOWDIN? ARE YOU POSITIVE?"

Why would he not be?

"it's like the reports undyne briefed us on. a group goes about making distractions and cleans up the evidence made by the single soul doing the dirty work."

As if life down here isn't hard enough.

"ANY LEADS?"

Sans looks back towards the Ruins.

"her boot tread doesn't go past the exit door all that much and i found a few stray drops of blood. my guess is they laid her ass out with a sneak attack then carried her off. such active numbers couldn't have just got here all at once or it would be too noticeable."

"YES, IT'S POSSIBLE THEY WENT THERE ONE AT A TIME THROUGHOUT THE DAY AND HID TILL THE TIME WAS RIGHT."

"bet it helped that this was our worse day."

"TRUE. THESE PRICKS ARE CLEVER."

Is it really clever to take advantage of a missing worker and one too distracted to pay attention?

"don't praise them just yet. i might have an idea of where they come from."

"REALLY?"

"yeah. some moron decided to wear mtt brand shoes. you know? the expensive ones that have his likeness on the bottom."

"HMMM...MTT BRAND ITEMS AREN'T COMMON OUTSIDE OF HOTLAND. THERE'S NOT A LOT OF JOBS IN THE OTHER ZONES TO MAKE GOLD FROM."

"yeah. so either someone saved up for ages or we're looking at scum from hotland."

"YOU DON'T SUPPOSE ALPHYS IS INVOLVED?"

"Then what are you doing with the human? Because, frankly, it should've been sent to my lab by now."

"wouldn't surprise me. bitch knows about the human. and i've had the feeling she's been behind most of the reported disappearances. but you know undyne would never question it. thirsty fish bitch."

"IF TRUE, THEN THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET VERY DIFFICULT."

"so...they told ya anything?"

"BOTH OF THEM REPORT NOTHING UNUSUAL LEADING UP TO THE HUMAN'S ABDUCTION. THOUGH THE QUEEN MENTIONED THE GIRL RECEIVING A PHONE CALL BEFORE SHE DISAPPEARED."

"a phone call?"

"THE QUEEN ALSO NOTES SHE HAS SEEN AN UNKNOWN NUMBER POP UP IN THE HUMAN'S PHONE. WOULD YOU HAPPEN TO KNOW ABOUT THIS?"

"can't say i do. it's not like she told me about..."

"Hell, you used Mettaton for that tile puzzle. The guy's been obsessive ever since seeing her. He hasn't stopped talking about being so close to the human since he came back from Snowdin Forest."

"It was Mettaton! He traced my phone number from the other night."

"It's Mettaton. He called me again. And you know that he knows what I am."

"*soft* BUT DID I JUST HEAR THAT SOMEONE IS LAYING THEIR NASTY HANDS ON MY HUMAN?"

The realization hits Sans like a brick to the skull.

"...*whisper* oh shit."

A faint ringing can be heard.

"HOLD ON. SOMETHING'S HAPPENING."

The soft voice of Toriel answers a random call, possibly from the kidnappers. But her worried tone quickly turns to excited hope and the word child is heard.

"COME HOME, SANS. YOU'LL BE NEEDED FOR RECOVERY EXTRACTION."

"got it. be there in a sec."

He hangs up and sighs. This was worse than he figured if Mettaton was indeed the culprit. Damn machine was the reason for a RESET on what was a peaceful timeline. Well, at least there are some things he can count on when it came to the human. The girl was no damsel in distress. He just hoped nothing triggered her soul to turn black. He teleports back home completely unaware of the flower spying on him the entire time and intends to follow to find out more.

[HOTLAND LAB: around the same time]

Alphys has left me alone for a good long time now. Letting me assess my surroundings and bonds. They're tight. While one of my wrists is slightly loose. It's a trap. A ploy. She wants me to try. To make an escape attempt. I can do it. The issue is what happens when I do. Probability is not on my side. A scientist of unknown IQ has my on their turf and has who knows what in the line of traps lined up for prey that it has studied for years. Mines. Turrets. Lasers. Gas. Flamethrowers. Swinging blades. Spike pits. Razor wire. Possibility is limitless. Yet the possibilities only worsen if I remain here. I hate double edge swords. Damned if do and don't. Argh...Fuck my life.

"*wince*"

Yanking my wrist through the restraint brings back memories of the skeleton's shed. Seems like this is my role in life. Getting taken and escape. So annoying. At least that damn thing didn't dislocate. I need to keep quiet. Though it's kinda pointless. I'm more than likely being monitored in some way. Still, my odds are better if I adhere to being paranoid and ninja my ass through this place. Belt restraints are effective but old fashioned and flawed, easy to get out of if you have a free hand. I'm free in less than a minute and rips the patch off. Medical or not, I don't like my soul being out. It makes this already messed up thing even more messed up. If my paranoia and overthinking brain are on point, then the door is most likely unlocked. There's probably even a set path I'll be forced on too. Drive the cattle to the slaughter, or so they say.

A light touch on the door has it open to a dimly lit hall. Totally giving off horror movie vibes. The air has a faint stale scent, this area most likely hasn't been active in a long time. The darkness makes the hall look exceptionally long. But down it I must travel and travel I do. My steps echo like I'm walking in an empty school. Giving me unease. Like, at any second, someone or something will pop out. I haven't felt so skittish since my middle school days dodging campus security to cut class and leave the building. I'm too on edge. A slight humming isn't helping my equilibrium either. Did she set up some sort of audio mind scrambler? Am I overthinking shit? It's a 50/50% on either at this point. So I change tactics. I run. If something happens it'll at least happen quickly.

Yet...I don't seem to be going anywhere. I pass countless doors without turning a corner. I must be going deeper into insanity or something isn't normal about it. It's almost like it's...

"Son of a whore!"

I stop and grab onto the edge of a door frame. Only for the floor and walls to pull me in two directions.

"A möbius strip? No...A treadmill. Very sneaky either way. Almost didn't catch on if it weren't for that humming getting louder when I ran. Heh...Willing to bet the motor is basic and can't push past its standard limits. Which means..."

I start running backward, the hum grinding loudly as momentum builds before stopping and allowing the convener to drag me in the direction I was headed before.

"You can't correct the way it moves until it slows down to the bare minimum speed."

I ride the out of control road up to where a door, unlike the rest, becomes noticeable, this thing has a knob. Flinging it open and jumping out saves me from that dumb endless hall. One annoying trap beat. Who knows how many more to go. At least this area looks normal enough. It's open, much like a normal living space, but it's not that exactly. The interior is faint red. There are two floors, the ground floor is what looks like a workplace and the second floor is a more personal space. I'm on the second floor.

"The hell...?"

The door behind me shuts itself, sealing to blend with the wall and its knob covered by a decorative mask of an angry looking cat-girl. Everything up here seems out of place and clearly belongs in some oddball bedroom. Beside me are five fully stocked bookcases containing all sorts of things. Alphys's obsessions and hobbies, comics, anime figures, an ice cream machine, unopened letters, etc. litter her room. It's honestly very creepy. Especially the wall posters of that same angry cat-girl that have eyes that follow you. I bumpy slide down the escalator handrail, not trusting the walkway to not be a trap, and feel instant unease once my feet touch the tile floor. On the ground floor, there is a large screen that's probably been used to monitor me, a fridge with a supply of instant noodles, a messy desk with her computer surrounded by odd instruments, and a washroom. This place is creepy. Where's the exit?

*RUMBLE*

The building shakes faintly though the sound was rather loud.

*RUMBLE*

It feels like it's moving...closer?

*RUMBLE*

*RUMBLE*

*RUMBLE*

*RUMBLE*

"The hell is going on?"

The lights suddenly go out. All is very still. Till...something explodes and sends into what I guess is a wall.

"SURPRISE!"

The lights come back on and reveal Mettaton, who is now posing after bursting through a different wall.

"SUCH A FABULOUS AND RANDOM ENTRANCE. DON'T YOU THINK SO, DARLING? HUH...DARLING?"

I am less than happy shoving rubble off of me.

"Unnecessary and overly flashy. Yep...That's a Mettaton entrance alright."

"TOO MUCH?"

I dust myself off.

"Just a tad. Though, I'll give you points for it being memorable."

"BUT IF GIVEN THE CHANCE TO RATE IT?"

"Um...7 out of 10."

"HMMM...NOTE TO SELF, NEXT TIME ADD FIREWORKS AND LASERS."

Is it cute that he's trying to be cool?

"So...Is being whacked with a bat your way of saying I was taking too long to get here? Or is that how you treat all your fans?"

His screen flashes.

"OH! NO. THAT WAS MORE OF AN IMPROVISATION ON BURGERPANTS'S PART. I DO HOPE YOU CAN OVERLOOK MY POOR JUDGEMENT IN HIS COMPETENCE."

I rub my head.

"I'll give you a pass this time. Mainly because I'm thick-skulled. But no more headshots. It sucks being unconscious so often."

"FAIR ENOUGH, DEAR."

"Well, you got me here. Caused a little trouble maybe? So now what? What does a bot like you want from little ol' me?"

"OH, DARLING...WHERE TO BEGIN?"

He rolls over to me and my creep vibes are tingling. Especially when two of his four hands start posing my arms and the other two cup my face.

"AMAZING. I'M ACTUALLY IN THE PRESENCE OF A REAL LIVING HUMAN. I'VE HEARD STORIES AND SEEN FOOTAGE, BUT I NEVER THOUGHT I'D EVER GET...TO TOUCH...YOU."

What the...? Why is he saying that in such a captivating tone of voice? And why is it making feel like a dumb cliché girl? I thought Alphys fixed my soul's emotional sensitivity? I shake it off. Now's not the time for this.

"Getting a bit handsy don't you think?"

I usually save that joke when talking about Gaster, but this fits the situation too. His screen blanks for a moment at my playful voice, though I feel stupid on the inside, before flickering randomly and he lets me go.

"MY APOLOGIES. I LET MY EXCITEMENT GET THE BETTER OF ME. PLEASE...FORGIVE MY ILL BEHAVIOR."

It's so hard to get a read on him. His TV self and off-camera self are like night and day. I don't know if I can drop my guard around him just yet. This isn't normal. I'm out of my element and still dealing with lots of unknowns. Better to play safe than end up sorry...or dead. I sigh and clap my hands.

"Be kind, let's rewind."

A "?" appears on his screen while I offer my hand to him.

"Howdy, Mettaton. It's nice to finally meet you. I'm Lynsie."

He's confused, that much is certain. Though it's short-lived as he swoons dramatically and falls into my arms. Dear lord! He's heavy! Must be the junk needed to work those four arms.

"MY GOODNESS. AFTER BEING TREATED SO RUDELY, YOU CHARM ME WITH A SIMPLE GREETING? OH, WHAT MARVELOUS CHEMISTRY! I KNEW YOU'D BE PERFECT FOR THIS."

I knew there was something sketchy. I drop him.

"Once again, I encounter the creature known as selfish d-bag. I'm going home."

Not sure where the exit is but I walk away from him anyway. He, of course, scrambles to get us and zips in front to block my path.

"NO, NO, NO, DARLING. YOU HAVE IT ALL WRONG. PLEASE DON'T BE SO HASTY TO LEAVE."

"Then to prevent my irritated departure you must answer me these questions three. Doing so truthfully will have you see me remaining here with thee. But...if deception is sensed, then you shall be cast into the Gorge of Eternal Peril. But since it's under renovations, I'll resort to smacking you instead."

God, I'm a nerd. Like he, or anyone else down here, knows Monty Python and the Holy Grail. However, the idea of a game seems to excite him.

"A Q&A? OH, DARLING, DO ASK AWAY. MY ANSWERS WILL SURELY BE THE STUFF YOU LONG TO HEAR."

I hold up a finger.

"First question...What are your plans for me since you have me here?"

His top set of hands twiddles their fingers while the bottom hands move as one does when dramatically speaking creatively.

"MY PLANS? OH, NOTHING MUCH REALLY."

I cock my eyes.

"Mind telling me what exactly what that is?"

"DO YOU WANT THAT TO BE YOUR SECOND QUESTION?"

I sneer.

"No. But you're not doing this right."

"HOW SO?"

"While you technically answered the question, you did so in the laziest and non-informative way."

"VERY WELL. I SHALL BE MORE INFORMATIVE WITH MY NEXT ANSWER."

"Thank you."

A second finger is put out.

"Second question...Nothing weird happened while I was unconscious, right?"

"*GASP* DARLING! THAT IS VULGAR OF THE HIGHEST DEGREE! WHILE I SHALL ADMIT..."

His hands cup my face and hold my shoulders.

"SEEING SUCH A HAPLESS FLOWER LIKE YOURSELF BE BROUGHT HERE. HURT AND UNRESPONSIVE. A LESSER MONSTER WOULD BE TEMPTED TO DO ALL SORTS OF THINGS. FORBIN THINGS. ANYTHING WOULD BE ON THE TABLE. LIMITED ONLY BY IMAGINATION..."

His voice is different. Completely monotone. All too personal. A shiver trembles down my neck. He lets the hands drop from my face but not the shoulders.

"BUT I AM NOT LIKE THOSE WEAKLINGS. I KNOW BETTER THAN TO PLUCK A FLOWER BEFORE IT BLOSSOMS. AND OURS IS ONE THAT IS JUST STARTING TO BUD."

I hate so much right now.

"DARLING?"

"Too much info."

"WELL, YOU DID ASK FOR MORE."

"Then...*sigh*...Never mind."

"AND YOUR THIRD QUESTION?"

My third? Oh! Oh shit!

"Yeah, my third question...Did you or your goon bother to inform Toriel of this impromptu adventure/kidnapping in a way that won't result in property damage/loss of life?"

"WELL..."

Big red flag warning! Fuck being nice! serious time!

"Where's my phone?"

"HUH?"

"I know it's not on me. Do you think I can't tell if there's suddenly no weight in my baggy pockets? Now if you want to escape death at her hands or mine, please...Hand it over."

He throws his hands up.

"DARLING I DON'T..."

*Bang*

He is surprised by the sudden strike.

"Don't make me do that again. Now, please, give me my phone."

"I PROMISE, DARLING, I DON'T HAVE IT."

I want to hit him again, but my throbbing hand is screaming. Change of plans.

"Give me your phone."

"W-WHAT? WHY?"

"Don't make me break my hand in repeating myself."

He rumbles and a phone shoots out of a port on his side.

"YOU ARE SCARY WHEN SERIOUS. HERE."

"Thank you."

I reach for it and he pulls back.

"AH AH AH. FIRST, A LITTLE PROMISE. YOU CAN USE THIS, BUT THEN YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING FOR ME."

I growl in building annoyance.

"WELL? THE CLOCK IS TICKING."

I don't have time for this crap.

"...Fine."

He giggles and hands it to me. I scroll through his past calls. My number appears under some others all marked as SLAVE #...I guess he fits in down here more than I thought. Metal boss from hell. My phone could be with any of the goons so I thank my lucky stars that Toriel's number is burned into my head. Time to brace for impact.

[Snowdin: Skeleton House in present time]

Sans returns home in the kitchen, needing a drink to replenish his magic if he's to teleport any more tonight. He steps into the room to see the other three all trying to listen to the small phone at once. Guessing they are too focused to remember phones have an intercom function.

"Child where are you? Are you hurt?"

"A little sore, but otherwise okay."

Oh...never mind then. They're just being weird.

"As for the where I assume this is the Lab in Hotland. *muffled* There are no other labs in the Underground, right?"

"*faint* THAT'S CORRECT, DARLING."

The electronic voice is recognized by all except Toriel.

"Young one, who is that with you?"

"Would you believe a robotic TV star?"

"*faint* OH, DARLING, YOU FLATTER ME."

"Make that a robotic TV star with an ego bigger than Papyrus's."

"FUCK YOU, HUMAN."

Papyrus interrupts.

"Oh wow. I expected this but had my doubts Nanny would actually do it. Who else is there?"

"You had us worried, pussycat."

There's a pause.

"Don't tell me you thought he took me?"

Toriel laughs nervously.

"*groan* Mom..."

"ENOUGH WITH THE CHIT CHAT. ARE YOU ABLE TO LEAVE ON YOUR OWN OR NOT?"

"Hmmm...As far as I know, I'm able to go. But I have to do something for Mettaton first."

"Why?"

"I had to promise to do a favor to use his phone. Mine might be in the hands of some goon."

"What is it you have to do?"

"That's a good question. *muffled* Yo, what's this thing I have to do?"

"*faint* NOTHING TOO DIFFICULT. I JUST NEED YOU TO BE YOURSELF FOR THE NEXT...OH...LET'S SAY TWO HOURS."

"*muffled* What?"

"*faint* I THINK IT WOULD BE EASIER TO UNDERSTAND IF YOU TELL YOUR FRIENDS TO TURN ON THE TELEVISION."

The mood shifts ominously.

"*muffled* You can't mean what I think you mean."

"*faint* GO ON. TELL THEM."

"Uh...Turn on the TV?"

Sans grabbed the remote before the other could scramble and with a heavy feeling in his soul hits the on the button. The screen comes alive to a timer counting down. The caption above reading "Live Once In a Lifetime Event Special". The timer has less than five minutes remaining. Panic strikes. Papyrus steals the phone.

"GET OUT OF THERE, HUMAN!"

"Okay, ow, my ears are bleeding."

Grillby snatches the phone.

"Lynsie, you need to get out of there. You're being set up to appear on TV."

The next sound the group hears is the phone clattering to the floor and sprinting feet hitting tile flooring. Other sounds can be heard. Mechanical and aggressive sounds. Then...the line goes dead.

"SANS, GO GET..."

"i can't."

"What? Why not?"

"all she said was she's at the lab. do you know how big that place is? i need to know exactly where or i'm just wasting magic."

"But, Sans, you promised me you would..."

"i know tori, i ain't forgetting it. i don't want her exposed to the underground either. trust me on that. but i can't just poof to a secured building. alphys is probably expecting interference. and trust me, it's not a good thing to just pop in with no quick plan to get out."

Suddenly the TV begins beeping. The timer clocking down the remaining ten seconds. And all they could do was watch and wait. At the timer's end, the screen darkens to black before a flashy title screen appears while glam-rock plays. The image then cuts to live footage in a weird game show looking room and then...

"GREETINGS ALL YOU BITCHES AND BASTARDS. WELCOME TO A VERY SPECIAL EVENING OF ENTERTAINMENT. TO START THINGS OFF...A QUIZ SHOW!"

Mettaton flamboyantly parades around.

"BUT WAIT. WHAT MAKES THIS SPECIAL THAT IT WARRANTS LIVE BROADCASTING? WELL, YOU INGRATES, IT'S BECAUSE WE HAVE A GUEST THAT'S GOING TO BE WORTH WATCHING. ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE OUR LEADING LADY...THE ONE THE ONLY..."

The camera jumps to a stand where a spotlight illuminates onto the bound and gagged human. Arms restrained behind her back and ankles cuffed to the floor.

"THE HUMAN!"

Her glare is full of rage and the beastly noises escaping the gag as she trashes in the binds make her look as dangerous as the humans of old.

"THAT'S RIGHT, A REAL LIVING HUMAN. YOU MIGHT BE QUESTIONING THE AUTHENTICITY OF THIS CLAIM. YET I ASSURE YOU, SHE IS THE REAL DEAL."

One of his hands stretches out towards her. She recoils from the grasping appendage but she can't move from the metal hand that proceeds to taser at the chest. The pain makes her screech and her light blue soul briefly emerges. Upon seeing the heart, Mettaton stops the attack.

"AS YOU CAN SEE, HER SOUL IS CLEARLY THAT OF A HUMAN'S. SHE IS 100% HUMAN AND NOT CGI OR SOMEONE IN CUSTOM. FOR NOT EVEN THE GREATEST ACTOR OR SPECIAL EFFECTS CAN MAKE A HUMAN SOUL. AND DEFINITELY NOT ONE SO LOVELY."

The assaulting hand tease touches where the soul came from and the human cringes. Though she's not the only one. Toriel is appalled and Grillby is fuming.

"OH BOY! I CAN ALREADY TELL IT'S GONNA BE A GREAT SHOW! EVERYONE GIVE A BIG HAND FOR OUR WONDERFUL CONTESTANT!"

All four of his hands clap as he moves over to podium across from her.

"I TAKE IT YOU'VE NEVER PLAYED BEFORE, GORGEOUS?"

She huffs loudly through her nose.

"NO PROBLEM! IT'S SIMPLE! THERE'S ONLY ONE RULE. ANSWER CORRECTLY...OR YOU DIE!"

Mettaton laughs evilly yet the human rolls her eyes. The others look to Sans again.

"don't look at me. i have no clue where that room is."

Their attention goes back to the screen as the Fair Fight Field actives as if they were in battle.

[METAL CRUSHER begins to play in the background.]

[Mettaton attacks!]

"YOUR MOVE, DARLING. YOU GET ONE FREE TURN BEFORE WE START."

The girl weighs her limited options.

[FIGHT]

[ACT]

[̴͝SP͜͞E͡L̵͜L͟͠͏]͘͢

[ITEM]

[MERCY]

Her confusion is warranted. An unknown option could lead to bad things.

[ACT selected.]

[New options available.]

[CHECK]

[CRY]

She huffs and makes a choice.

[CHECK selected.]

[Mettaton – HP: 9999 ATK: 300 DEF: 999 – His metal body renders him invulnerable to attack.]

Her eyes nearly bug out of her head.

"NOT A BAD FIRST MOVE, DEAR. IT'S NEVER BAD TO CHECK ME OUT."

A screen mounted behind him blinks on.

"LET'S START WITH AN EASY ONE!"

A question appears on the screen.

[What's the prize for answering correctly?]

A) Money

B) Death

C) Freedom

D) More questions

Four buttons pop up on her stand.

"CHOOSE CORRECTLY OR BE MET WITH TERRIBLE PAIN."

The look she has is one filled with hate. Yet she complies and presses the D button with her chin. A pleasant fanfare goes off.

"RIGHT! SOUNDS LIKE YOU GET IT! HERE'S YOUR TERRIFIC PRIZE!"

Her turn is skipped due and the screen puts up another question.

"What sort of crap is this?"

Grillby interjects.

"Her turn was skipped. How is that even possible?"

Toriel ponders.

"leave it to that quack to figure out a way to break the rules."

Sans says between drinks.

[What's the king's full name?]

A) Lord Deathbeard

B) Killer Killington

C) Asgore Dreemurr

D) Krampus

The human quickly presses the C button and the fanfare goes off again.

"CORRECT! WHAT A TERRIFIC ANSWER! ARE YOU SURE YOU'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE?"

She nods.

"ENOUGH ABOUT YOU. LET'S TALK ABOUT ME!"

She groans as the screen brings up another question.

[What are robots made of?]

A) Hopes&Dreams

B) Metal&Magic

C) Blood&Guts

D) Hate&Spite

She pops her neck and presses the B button. Once more the fanfare plays. This time Mettaton gets some attitude.

"TOO EASY FOR YOU, HUH?"

She shrugs.

"WELL THEN...HERE'S ANOTHER EASY ONE FOR YOU "

[Two trains, Train A, and Train B, simultaneously depart Station A and Station B. Station A, and Station B are 252.5 miles apart from each other. Train A is moving at 124.7mph towards Station B, and Train B is moving at 253.5mph towards Station A. If both trains departed at 10:00 AM and it is now 10:08, how much longer until both trains pass each other?]

A) 31.054 minutes

B) 16.232 minutes

C) 32.049 minutes

D) 32.058 minutes

She's hesitant now. Her eyes hold uncertainty.

"Oh no..."

Toriel mutters.

"We have yet to go over such math lessons."

"THEN SHE BETTER BE A GOOD GUESSER."

The human's eyes dart from button to button. She has no clue. She picks one at random...A. A buzzer goes off.

"WRONG! WRONG! WROOOOOOOONG!"

Mettaton points at her and fires a laser blast into her left shoulder. If it weren't for the gag her cries would be excruciating.

[HP ██████████████████████████ 26/36]

She pants, biting the gag to brace some of the pain.

Toriel is understandably horrified and Grillby is worried. Though Sans and Papyrus are impressed.

"SHE'S GOTTEN TOUGHER."

"the is no pushover. the tin can is gonna learn that the hard way."

"SORRY, DARLING. BUT THE CORRECT ANSWER WAS D. MAYBE YOU'LL HAVE BETTER LUCK WITH THE NEXT QUESTION. THEN AGAIN...DON'T 'COUNT' ON YOUR VICTORY."

The next question pops up.

[How many eyes are in this jar?]

An image appears for a split second.

A) 54

B) 53

C) 55

D) 52

Not given much time to study the image, she once more has to guess.

"What kind of game is this? She is not being given a fair play."

Toriel complains.

"ACTUALLY, AS WRONG AS IT LOOKS, HE IS FOLLOWING THE LAW."

Papyrus corrects.

"You must be joking."

"he's not. one of the laws enforced after you left the king was to stop humans at all costs while giving them some form of a chance. the tin can is giving her multiple choices and only inflicting minimal damage. if he wanted to, he could just off her right there."

Explains Sans.

"As much as I don't like it, it makes sense. With one soul remaining to break the barrier extremes are bound to be made to get it. For what is the life of one human when held next to the entire Underground?"

Grillby comments and Toriel frowns. Even she sees the point in that. But that does mean she likes it.

The human contemplates her choices and seems to do a mental coin flip before pressing the D button. This time, the buzzer sounds.

"COMPLETELY UTTERLY WRONG!"

Mettaton blasts her again in the right shoulder and her roar is bloodcurdling.

[HP ████████████████ 16/36]

The bloody gaping holes in her shoulders make her slump over against the stand. She won't last much longer if this keeps up.

"THE CORRECT ANSWER WAS A. YOU MIGHT WANT TO TRY HARDER FROM HERE ON."

An annoyed groan was her reply.

"HMMM...MAYBE YOU NEED SOMETHING ELSE. LET'S PLAY A MEMORY GAME."

The screen produces a new question and image.

[What monster is this?]

The monster shown is half of a Froggit's face.

A) Froggit

B) Whimsun

C) Moldsmal

D) Mettaton

This one seems like a no-brainer yet the human seems unsure. Mostly because blood loss makes it hard to think.

"WHY IS SHE HESITATING? THE ANSWER IS CLEARLY A."

Papyrus bitches.

"Really? You think it's that easy?"

Grillby retorts.

"THEN WHAT DO YOU THINK IT IS?"

"I'm surprised you do see it. It's obviously D."

"BULL CRAP. I BET YOU 10G IT'S A."

"Fine. Just don't be upset when you're wrong."

After thinking long and hard about the question, the human presses the D button. The fanfare plays.

"I'M SO FLATTERED YOU REMEMBERED! LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE WHOLE IMAGE."

The picture unfolds to reveal Mettaton wearing a shirt with a Froggit's face on it.

Papyrus's jaw clenches as Grillby folds his hands behind his head with a smug attitude.

"You need to listen to pussycat more often. She did say he had an ego bigger than yours."

"FUCK YOU."

"Just pay me by week's end."

Papyrus grumbles while turning back to the TV.

"YOU'VE BEEN ON A ROLL SO FAR. BUT CAN YOU GET THIS ONE?"

The screen brings up a new and rather odd question.

[Would you smooch a ghost?]

A) Heck Yeah

B) Heck Yeah

C) Heck Yeah

D) Heck Yeah

The human and the watching group all share the say "what the fuck" look.

"GO ON. CONSIDER THIS AN ACT OF MERCY."

She sneers and reluctantly presses the B button. With no wrong choice to make, the fanfare plays.

"GREAT ANSWER! I LOVE IT!"

A steaming Grillby hates it.

"HERE'S A SIMPLE ONE."

The screen pops up the next question.

[How many letters in the name Mettaton?]

A) 11

B) 6

C) 8

D) 10

A relatively easy question except for the number of Ns at the name's end increases and eventually goes out of the screen with the numbers in the answers increasing accordingly.

"How in the world do you answer that?"

Toriel puzzles.

"it's c."

Sans says softly to the confusion of the others.

"for a second, the real numbers were there. c had eight, which is the right answer regardless of the increasing."

"Here's hoping she saw that too."

Says Grillby while adjusting his glasses.

The human is beginning to look paler than normal. The strain on her body and mind making things difficult. She wearily presses the C button, mainly due to landing on it after a slight dizzy spell, and the fanfare plays.

"OF COURSE THAT WAS EASY FOR YOU!"

She grunts against the stand, pushing herself to keep going even as her body wants her to stop.

"Come on, pussycat. You can hold out just a bit longer."

Grillby says to himself before flinching at the feel of Toriel's hand holding his. She gives him a motherly smile and it helps calm his nerves for now.

"YOU'LL BE SURE TO KNOW THE ANSWER TO THIS ONE!"

The screen pops up another random question.

[What's a pretzel's favorite color?]

A) Black

B) Yellow

C) Red

D) Dusk

This had to be one of the odder questions to be done though tame. The human wastes no time picking a button. Either to end it faster or knowing it, who's to say. But her head thuds onto the B button and the fanfare plays.

"CORRECT! YOU'RE SO LUCKY TODAY!"

The amount of blood pooling on the floor says otherwise.

"TIME TO BREAK OUT THE BIG GUNS! HERE IS YOUR FINAL QUESTION."

The screen shows the question.

[How bright is this text?]

A) 85% Bright

B) 84% Bright

C) 86% Bright

D) 83% Bright

This made little sense. The question text was the same color as all other questions. How was this even answerable to her when she can hardly even look up at the screen?

The group is just as confused. How do you tell the percentage of brightness to text?

Though after some time of no movement from the human, Mettaton rolls around his podium.

"DARLING? ARE YOU ABLE TO MAKE A CHOICE?"

A tired moan drones out of the gag.

"TELL YOU WHAT, I'LL BE NICE AND HELP YOU OUT."

Mettaton zips over to the slumped over human.

"MY MY. SUCH A MESS YOU'VE MADE BACK HERE. GOOD THING NO MESS IS TOO BIG FOR MTT BRAND INDUSTRIAL CLEANER. IN STORES NOW."

The robot plugs his latest product in the middle of a show...real classy.

"what a jackass."

Scoffs Sans.

The other soundly agree.

"OKAY, DEAR, ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS STARE AT THE BUTTON YOU WANT TO ANSWER FOR AND I SHALL PUSH IT FOR YOU."

She tilts her head and stares.

"IS C YOU'RE FINAL ANSWER?"

She exhales long and loud through her nose.

"I'LL TAKE THAT AS A YES."

He unnecessarily extends his arm in a twisty and bendy way before pushing the C button. However...Buzzer sounds.

"OH BOY, THAT'S EMBARRASSING, HUH?"

This time he blasts through her right leg making her buckle in pain to the crimson soaked floor.

[HP ██████ 06/36]

[Background music briefly pauses in silence]

"WELL WELL WELL. THAT SETTLES THAT, DOESN'T IT?"

To much befuddlement, Mettaton proceeds to remove the restraints and gag from the broken girl.

"*weak* W-What are you doing?"

"SUCH A SILLY QUESTION. IF YOU DIE THE SHOW HAS NO DRAMATIC TENSION! WE CAN'T GO ON LIKE THIS!"

She's in no position to fight this or wants to. He collects her from the ground and seems to gently hold her in two of his arms. So much red coats just about everything. He then addresses one of the many hidden cameras in the room.

"I KNOW WHAT YOU ALL MIGHT BE THINKING. BUT METTATON, WHY AREN'T YOU GOING TO KILL THE HUMAN? YOU CLEARLY HAVE THE CHANCE. TO THAT I SAY, NO. SHE WON THIS GAME. AND THEREFORE, SHE PROCEEDS TO THE NEXT ROUND OF OUR LITTLE GAME. THAT'S RIGHT! THIS WAS JUST THE FIRST ACT! NEXT UP, MORE DRAMA! MORE ROMANCE! MORE BLOODSHED! STAY TUNED, LOSERS...! NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME...THIS LOVELY LADY NEEDS TO HEAL. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AFTER THESE COMMERCIAL MESSAGES."

The broadcast fades into commercials. The four of them are left with more questions than answers. But at least one thing is going in their favor. Mettaton wants to keep her alive. Perhaps in the next show, she'll appear in a location that's more recognizable and rescue can be done before anyone else tries to get her. Though the four of them weren't the only ones watching the show. A small indent in the window and ground below were all the tells of the sneaky flower. His mission now clear. Save his sister.

[Hotland Lad: Medical Room]

Alphys finishes setting up life-support systems by the time Mettaton wheels in with the now very near dead human.

"Put her here."

He need not be told twice.

"Some first act. She's almost dead."

Less of a reprimand and more of a statement by Alphys while she begins plugging the human into the machines.

"I WAS WORRIED NEAR THE END. HAD SHE MISSED ANOTHER QUESTION I MIGHT HAVE NEEDED TO GO OFF SCRIPT. MAIN CHARACTERS CAN'T DIE SO EARLY IN THE SHOW."

"You're just lucky I can fix this."

"WILL SHE NEED LONG TO HEAL?"

Alphys sticks in an IV drip and taps it for bubbles.

"Don't rush this. Your blast, while clean, went through a lot of muscle and bone. Not to mention all the blood that'll need to refill. That kind of stuff will need longer to repair."

"BUT...WE CAN'T JUST LEAVE COMMERCIALS GOING TILL THEN."

The annoyed scientist shoots him a look.

"Then I guess you need some filler till then."

Mettaton cringes.

"FILLER?! SUCH A DIRTY WORD. WHAT WOULD IT EVEN BE?"

"How about you figure that out elsewhere? I need to work. Or do you want this to take longer?"

That had him speeding away as she then shouts.

"And clean up all this blood! This is a lab! Not a butcher shop!"

She was unsure he heard all that but focused on monitoring the human.

"*sigh* You are so lucky I'm bored or you'd be under my knife right now."

The human involuntarily twitches, earning a smirk from the spectacle-wearing lizard.

"Maybe you'll heal sooner than expected."

Oh, how she enjoyed her work.

#undertale #underfell #Anomaly #Lynsie #sans #papyrus #gaster #grillby #grandpa semi #mettaton #napstablook #chara #flowey #frisk #toriel #Asriel #asgore #undyne #alphys

[realityhelixcreates]

Lasabrjotr Chapter 35: Planecdote

Chapters: 35/? Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Teen And Up Warnings: None Relationships: Loki x Reader (Someday) Characters: Loki (Marvel), Reader,  Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), Reader Has Some Insight, Loki Tries To Explain Himself, But May Still Be An Unreliable Narrator Summary:   In which Loki explains exactly what he was up to during the New York Attack. It's up to you whether you believe him or not .

It was nice that you had made some friends, Loki thought, slightly annoyed at the continued presence of your little group of human followers. They had followed you around all day while you explained-surprisingly patiently-the abridged version of what had happened to you. They were fascinated by your potential with magic, by Asgard, and, much to his surprise, by him. He had tailed you, of course, in multiple human guises. He had to make sure you were safe, but he understood the need to be on your own. He didn't like it, but he understood.

They wanted to know everything, and for the most part, you didn't have any problems telling them. When some of the questions got a little sensitive, you just laughed softly and told them it was a 'political secret'-no matter what the subject was. They seemed to appreciate the joke.

“But what about when he attacked us?” One piped up. “Is that a political secret too?”

“No,” You sighed. “It's no secret, it's just something I don't know. We haven't exactly discussed it.”

Of course. The crux of every matter involving him, at least from the Earth's standpoint. It would always come up, in every conversation about him. He lounged against a wall, not so far away, only gaining notice because of the impeccably dressed and handsome shape he had taken. Otherwise, none of your little squad was paying him any attention, and he could eavesdrop with ease.

“I can tell you though, that it wasn't exactly his idea.” You said conspiratorially. “He was under someone else's control.”

Oh damn. You were talking about it. Well, he hadn't asked you not to, but it wasn't a subject he wanted to dwell on.

“Someone else was pulling the strings? Who?”

“His name was Thanos, and he was some kinda alien or something. But it's okay, he's dead now. Can't cause any more trouble.”

“Okay, but did he just tell you that? Do you have any proof he wasn't just making it up?”

“Thor corroborated.” You said. “In fact, Thor was the one who told me in the first place. I don't think Loki would have even mentioned it.”

“Why not?” A young man asked. “You'd think that would be the first thing he brought up. Get the blame off of him.”

It's shame.” You said so quietly that he barely heard you. “You gotta understand, Loki is royalty, and not just any royalty; his planet used to rule lots of other planets. He's a prince of whole worlds. He's a god. Like, actually a god, of the old kind that were way more like people, but still gods. For him to have been used like that, to be brought low like that...he'd probably rather we all think he's just evil, rather than have us entertain the possibility for one second that he might have ever been weak enough to allow anyone else to control his actions.”

Loki was boiling inside, but it wasn't with anger. The stew of emotions stuck in his throat like bile. One would think you'd been given Heimdalls eyes, to see through him so. Unsettled, Loki dug his fingers into the wall beside him.

“He actually takes his job really seriously.” You continued. “And his people seem to like him a lot, so he must be good at it. I mean, even the maids speak highly of him, and if he's nice to the servants, he must be pretty decent overall. And so far, he has been really good to me.”

“Are you dating?”

You had Loki's full attention.

You twiddled your fingers nervously. “Is this about all those so-called 'news' articles? We're friends. I think. I'm pretty sure. But I've only known him for a little while, you know?”

“Girl, it's been the whole summer! The sun's just weird here.”

“Wow, has it really been that long? I've just had so much on my plate, and I haven't thought about dating anyone in a long time now. Besides, he's an immortal god-prince, and I'm...I don't know what I am really anymore. Like, I'm working class, but I've been promoted? I dunno, I'm not royalty, so it's probably not even allowed.”

It was. Women in Asgard tended to marry 'up', so to speak. He could marry a peasant if he wanted to. Not without pushback from every noble who wanted to put forth their own daughters, and there weren't many strengthening family alliances that could be made with the lower classes. Not to mention, he simply didn't know many individual peasants, probably for those very reasons. But theoretically, it wasn't forbidden.

But it was something he shouldn't be contemplating right now. He had no time. No inclination. And there was no one of interest to him. No one...

“And anyway, I've got a lot going on, you know?” You were saying. “Gotta learn magic, Asgardian history, and language, and culture, court manners. You know, all that stuff. I can't think about romance right now. Maybe not ever again.”

Your new posse was quick to coo, and protest, and reassure you that that wasn't so, that you'd find someone. Loki wanted to agree. It wasn't as if he wanted you to remain celibate or anything, it was just that he didn't think you had many options. There weren't many humans for you to interact with, and fewer Asgardians who could be considered worthy of you. He supposed that was his fault. Appointing you as his personal seidkona had shot you up through social ranks in a way he didn't think you understood just yet. There were very few people on your level.

“It's not so bad though.” You continued. “I've got more than enough to occupy my time, and if I haven't run him off, Loki is almost always there. I'm not lonely or anything, so I don't necessarily need romance. Don't worry about it. I'm not.”

“Um, sir? Are you aware that you are damaging the wall?” A passerby asked quietly. Loki drew his hands away from where he'd been digging his fingers in, only then realizing that he had left dents in the plaster.

“I see.” He answered, just as quietly. “Thank you for informing me.”

The person moved on swiftly, a concerned expression on their face.

“There's always Thor.” Someone suggested. “We know for sure he's into humans, even if Loki isn't.”

Suddenly Loki was boiling again.

You laughed. “No way! He's not my type. Don't get me wrong, he's great, but just not my kind of guy.”

The bubbling inferno subsided to be replaced by a strange nervy, buoyant feeling. He'd never before heard a woman be so dismissive of the possibility of his brother's affections. From Midgard to Vanaheim, Thor was considered the pinnacle of masculine perfection, everyone knew that. To hear you so quickly declare him to be uninteresting to you was deeply satisfying.

He wanted to wade in among this little group of humans, to scatter them, and take you away. Yes, you needed interaction with other people, but this was all time you could be spending with him. Without any duties, without any danger, just being. You could be exploring the museums, or watching the great whale behemoths swim and blow water into the air, or sampling delicious dishes, which you so loved to do, or just walking the town, holding hands...

No wait, he wasn't doing that anymore. He was going to be more professional, more magisterial. More royal.

You stayed there talking until evening, when hunger presumably overtook you, and your new friends saw you back to your hotel in a tight, protective little group. Loki, of course, managed to get back into your shared room before you, and composed himself as if he had just been waiting for your to return.

“Pleasant afternoon?” He asked innocently.

“Yeah, actually.” You said. “Lotta good conversation, and I think I convinced them that I was fine. They might even hate you a bit less now too.”

“I am not concerned with their opinions.” Loki scoffed. You called that good conversation? Inane questions and senseless suggestions? You were better than that.

“Well, maybe I am. Loki, nobody knows anything about you except for what you did five years ago. Why haven't you done anything to defend yourself? If you just told people what really happened-”

“Would that make it better?” Loki interjected. “Would that gain me forgiveness? Would they even believe me, were I to apologize?”

Well...some would. Especially if you didn't do any other bad things, or did good things instead. Like the nature reserves...”

Loki stepped close and took your hands in his. He would stop tomorrow.

“_____ you know it wouldn't go that smoothly. There is a limit on what I can say. If I told people I was being influenced, they would want to know by whom. And if I spoke about Thanos, they would want to know more about him, his goals, and especially his methods. They would start looking for more answers, and we don't want that. Someone would stumble across information about the Stones, and go looking for them, and it would all start over again. I am pleased that you care about my reputation, but if I want to keep the universe safe, there is little I can do to clear my name.”

You hung your head, refusing to meet his gaze. “ I just thought maybe you could get people to like you, and then you wouldn't have so many enemies.”

Loki laughed. “I'm royalty; I'll always have enemies. I welcome them. They help keep me sharp. Now I need your help with a very important matter.”

“Yes?” You asked, looking back up.

“Where shall we go for dinner?”

                                                                         *****

You ended up in an old, wooden building with a quaint, timber-framed interior, that was far too casual for the effort he had put into his impeccable suit and clean ponytail. He'd thought that you might appreciate seeing him in fine human style, after your day among your own kind, and indeed, it seemed to affect you. In fact, you'd had a hard time taking your eyes off him.

It was pleasant, noticing others staring at you in your beautiful Asgardian dress, and seeing that you were only looking at him. Perhaps he was a finer specimen than he had given himself credit for. But you both stuck out like jewels in a goat's ear, in this tavern-like establishment.

You had insisted though, as soon as you found out they served American food. It seemed your nostalgia was high.

“Pizza, Loki.” You had said. “I haven't had pizza in like, four months, and I just gotta have a pizza!”

So he had caved in, and brought you to this rustic restaurant, where you had ordered a pizza and a soda, and exclaimed about how it had been so long, and laughed at him when he tried to eat his slice of the messy Midgardian concoction with a fork, as was clearly proper. Somehow, you were balancing a floppy slice of the mess in one hand, and just eating it like that. Loki sighed and shook his head. Someday he would cure you of those peasant manners.

“Say, Loki...” You said between bites. “Am I allowed to ask you kinda personal questions?”

When have you ever held back? “To be honest, as my seidkona, you are not only allowed, but expected to question me. Just be mindful of the context, and the situation, and the nature of the question itself. I, on the other hand, need not answer if I do not wish to.”

You nodded slowly. “I want to ask you about the dream we shared.”

“Which one?” They were both unpleasant.

“The more recent one.”

“Ah. Well, if you will but indulge me...” He made a flourishing gesture, and the sound of the wait staff and the other patrons dulled and slowed. “We will go unheard now. It is as safe to ask as it can be.”

Your eyes flicked around the restaurant, taking in the altered noise. “Wow...That's really handy!”

“Your question?” He prompted.

“Oh right. Um. Were you really going to let them kill three and a half billion people?”

Yes that would be an important question to you. There was a fifty percent chance you would have been one of them.

“No.” He said frankly. “There's a reason that was a nightmare. That was the worst case scenario; what was likely to happen if all my planning went awry.”

“I mean, you could have died.”

“Unlikely. But it was something I included in my plans. That was the second worst case scenario.”

“Wait, wait. There was a scenario where winning was worse than death?”

“Yes, of course. Conquering your realm, but remaining under Thanos' boot would mean that all of my plans had failed, and I would never be free.”

“What exactly was the plan, anyway?”

“It's moot now.” He shrugged. “But a lot of it came down to control of the Mind Stone. It was caged within my scepter, and was what I used to control the Chitauri troops, as well as the handful of people I touched with it. I...was also being controlled, as Thanos exerted his influence over me through the stone. I was, on some level, aware of it, and everything I did on your realm was part of my plot to flout him. Defeat was acceptable to me, death was acceptable, but ideally, I would triumph.

I would have taken the realm with as little damage as possible. It was important to keep as much as I could intact, especially your weapons, your warriors, your resources. If everything had gone absolutely flawlessly, I would have defeated your Avengers, and added them to my army with the power of the Stone. With their power, their minds, their funds, I would have built defenses for the Earth, especially enhancing you space travel capabilities. I would have pulled hundreds of thousands of Chitauri troops in, and then cut them off from their mothership, leaving them solely under my control.

The Chitauri would then go into space, to patrol. This is when we would have begun building bases on your moon, and mining operations across your planetary system. All humans who were capable of it would be given basic military training, as everyone would have to be mobilized against outside threats, especially from Thanos. And he would have tried. Three of the Stones were here on Earth at that time; there is no way he would have let up.

Of course, I would have also gathered up all magically talented individuals for training, once I realized they existed. So I would have found you either way, my dear, even without this binding rune. And while I was raising your planet out of the galactic mud, I would have sent my brother to Asgard to take his place as king. Once enthroned, he would have allied Asgard, and the rest of the realms to Midgard, and under my banner, we would have purged the universe of Thanos, and all his allies. After that, I would have ruled your planet as a benevolent god. I would not have tolerated defiance, but I would have rewarded those who deserved it. No divisions by race or religion, or culture, or wealth. Merit would be all that mattered.

Ah, but that would have interfered with your precious 'freedoms', so it could not be allowed.” He sighed. “You throw celebrations for a royal wedding in a country you don't even live in, but you hate the idea of kings. Hypocritical nonsense. And more, you weren't even allowed to make your own decision about it. Some man in an underground bunker decided I could not be king, and so war was declared against me before I could even present my case.”

“You did murder a bunch of guys.” You pointed out.

“I did murder a bunch of guys.” Loki admitted. “Almost entirely combatants.”

“Almost?”

“The museum curator in Stuttgart was not technically a combatant. He was working for my enemies however so he was fair game.”

“Okay, gotta admit, you are sounding distressingly villainous right now.” You said it almost jokingly, but your soda glass shook a little in your hand.

“I did tell you I still had it in me, did I not? And you did ask. This is all just hypothetical of course, In reality, my neutral plan is the one that panned out. I was defeated, but not killed, and eventually, Thanos was overcome. And you and I met anyway, just a little later we might have, so perhaps the Norns interwove our strings in all their tapestries. We were always going to meet. So I will try to be less villainous, as I already was, but you will have to confront the fact that I have been truly nefarious, especially if you ask me about the times when I was.”

He cupped your shaking hand as you put your drink down.

“Yeah I guess if I'm gonna pry, I'd better be ready for what I find, huh? So you believe in fate, Loki?”

“The Norns weave the threads of each life into a vast work that forms the universe, and we can travel those threads in whatever way we see fit. But some knots they tie very tight, and those are hard to wiggle around. Most people can't, and even those who can, cannot escape them all. Some things simply must happen. I suppose that's...as close to a religion as Asgardians get.”

“Do the Norns really exist?” You asked. “Like, are they people you could meet? I mean, we used to think gods weren't real, solid people that you could meet, and yet, here you are.” You brushed your knuckles against his palm, sending little jolts of electric warmth down his spine. “Very solid.”

Loki cleared his throat. He wasn't supposed to be holding your hand. He would stop tomorrow.

“Uh, well, I've never seen them, but that does not mean they don't exist. As you've learned, a great deal of things that weren't supposed to exist actually do. Just as there is a great, wide universe beyond your Earth, There may be even more outside of that which is beyond even we Aesir.”

“Wow. Something beyond even you? I never thought you would admit such a thing!” Your voice was laced with sarcasm.

“I am clearly among the greatest men you have ever been privileged to meet, but yes. There are forces greater even than I.” Perhaps he was laying it on a bit thick, but it was better that you snorted at the pretentiousness, and turned your interest to the mysteries of the universe, rather than the things he had done. Or rather, would have done.

What would he have done, if things had gone entirely his way? Would he have found you after all? Certainly, once he'd found out there were humans that could use magic, he'd have had them all rounded up for training. But if there were very many, would he have noticed you?

Probably. You had such a knack for getting yourself in trouble. For curiosity. For poking at the core of him. Oh, he would have hated it. For he would have seen that you were a valuable asset and would not have brought you to harm, but you would have frustrated him greatly. You weren't disobedient exactly, just...mouthy.

It was a trait he simultaneously valued as a person, but despised as a ruler. He had liked it in his mother, he had liked it in Sif, he had even liked it in Jane Foster, and he...he liked it in you.

Yes, he likely would have kept you very close. Perhaps he would have made it his personal responsibility to correct you.

Oh, but he should definitely not be allowing his thoughts to wander down such a path.

He would stop tomorrow.

#loki x reader #loki (marvel) #marvel fanfiction

[parkersharthook]

All My Sides Ch. 2

(Peter Parker x female!reader)

warnings: fainting, implied kidnapping, short chapter

1.7k+ words

Ch 1

“Something happened to Spiderman…” Wanda hesitated, “Peter lost his powers.”

“Peter?” Peter swore he heard Y/n’s voice, but she was supposed to be with her family at least for a few more hours. “Peter will you open the door.”

“I can’t.” he sniffed as he looked towards the door, “Not right now.”

“Okay, that’s okay Peter. I’m just gonna sit right here until you’re ready for me. I’m right here.” he saw her shadow shift slightly before seeing her body against the door. “I’m right here.”

~.~

“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.” He had practically collapsed beside her, heavy tears falling from his eyes. She quickly pulled him to her, neither caring they were half in the hallway and half not. Y/n gripped the back of his shirt and ran her other hand through his hair.

“Peter you don’t need to apologize. I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere.” She held him tight and repeated the words until he calmed down.

~.~

It had been a week since the accident and Peter was… not sitting well. He was constantly fidgeting and tapping and just plain nervous. He hated not knowing when people were coming up behind him or when things were gonna hit him. And he certainly hated not being able to help the people of New York.

“I like your glasses.” Peter blushed slightly and hid his face opting to instead look out across the New York skyline.

“you’re finally getting to see the old me. Nerd and all.”

“I like it. It suits you. You’re one of those hot nerds.”

He smirked slightly and looked at her, “you think I’m hot?” She laughed and slapped his arm.

“Shut up you dork.” She suddenly stopped and snapped her fingers, “Can’t you still use your web shooters? I mean those are just science.”

Peter shook his head sadly, “After I upgraded the webbing the force of shooting the web is too much. You need superhero strength to handle it.”

“How do you know?”

Peter’s lip quirked up on one side, “Clint took them once a few years ago and tried to use them and just got knocked right off his feet. And he’s much stronger than I am right now. The only people that can use it are me, Steve, Bucky, and Mr. Stark when he has the suit on.” He paused before letting out a breath, “Wow…”

“What?”

“I became Spiderman 6 years ago. 6 years! That’s crazy.”

“Certainly is a long time.” Y/n knew this was a sensitive subject for him, but she pressed on gently anyways, “have you thought about what you’re going to do if he doesn’t come back?”

“I don’t really want to think about it.” He fiddled with his fingers, “Mr. Stark and Bruce are still analyzing the weapon… it’s just going slower than expected.”

“How so?”

“Mr. Stark thought he’d have it figured out in the first few days but now they don’t know what will set it off. They’re just tiptoeing around it at this point.”

“Do they know what set it off the last time?”

“They think it was the pencil jar falling, the noise triggered it. It was almost a defense mechanism… like it was protecting itself.”

Y/n hummed for a moment, “What would that do…? To the hulk?”

Peter shrugged, “We don’t know and we don’t want to find out.”

“Doesn’t Bruce want to know though?” Peter looked at her confused. She explained further, “I mean he told me that he’s been looking for a cure for the past decade or so. Of course, it takes a back seat for other purposes but he’s never really stopped.”

“How do you know this?”

She gave him an incredulous look, “I’m a biochemical engineer who comes over and hangs out with the world’s most famous people and you think I’m not going to talk to the Bruce Banner. Bitch please.” They shared a small laugh before she continued, “I mean… I doubt he would do anything. But you aren’t worried that he might see this as his way out? His way to just be Bruce again.”

“Would that work?”

“We don’t know.” The voice startled both Peter and Y/n, neither one of them not used to having a warning.

Y/n smacked his arm slightly, “I didn’t realize I relied on your senses so much.”

He twisted around slightly to face Natasha. “What’s up?”

“Fury called a meeting.” She narrowed her eyes slightly, “And you’re not supposed to go anywhere without your comms in case we need you.”

Peter scoffed and stood up, “Yeah like I could be much help. And I didn’t even leave the building.” He grabbed Y/n’s hand and helped her stand up, the two following after Natasha back to the elevator.

Nat glanced back at the two almost regretfully, “I noticed you were a lot less close to the edge than usual.”

Peter frowned, “That was when I knew I could catch myself if I fell.”

“You could always go back to your old formula. The one that could be handled by anyone?”

Peter shook his head slowly, “Wouldn’t do me much good. Can barely throw a punch, and the no Spidey sense is really hard to adjust to.”

“Whatever you say.” The trio stepped off the elevator and walked down the hallway towards the conference room. Peter spun to face Y/n.

She rolled her eyes, “I know I know… confidential and what not.”

“Bruce is in his lab if you want to hang out with him.” Nat supplied, “he won’t be in the meeting.”

Y/n perked up, “that’s a great idea! I actually need some help with my thesis.” She gave Peter a small peck on the cheek and turned in the opposite direction. Nat and Peter entered the room and sat down.

Fury walked in a moment later, “Mr. Parker… I got word of your situation.”

Peter spun languidly in the chair, “yes?”

“What were you planning on doing?” Peter was already tired of this conversation and instead lolled his head to face Tony.

Tony caught the hint, “Me and Bruce are working on reversing the blast from the gun. Currently though, we don’t know how long it will be until we have results.”

“And until then?”

“Peter stays out of trouble and Spiderman takes a little break.” Steve answered firmly, “Is there anything else?”

“Actually captain, there is. I’ve discove—” all of a sudden the lights turned off, casting the room into darkness.

“Friday?” Tony’s voice came across slightly panicked. All of the heroes tensed. The emergency lights flickered on, casting a red hue over the entire room. “Friday?”

“Systems are offline.” Natasha said.

“Friday is on a separate system to avoid things like this.” Tony immediately stood up and went to a control panel hidden behind a light switch. He ripped it off the wall and pressed the button that was previously hidden. An iron man suit came flying in a minute later, leds lighting up the room. He stepped into the suit as Steve grabbed his shield from the corner of the room, and the rest cocked some pistols.

“What do I do?” Peter whisper yelled.

“Don’t die.” Steve said as he strutted past the younger man. Right as he went to pull the door open, the lights came back on.

“Friday?”

“It appears someone tampered with our systems. But everything is alright now sir.”

“Connect me to Bruce will ya?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Tony?” Tony’s helmet disabled around his face and everyone relaxed slightly. “Tony, what was that?”

“I’m not sure. Is everything okay down there?”

“Yeah… nobody came in and nothing was taken. It’s just me down here.”

“Just you?” Peter asked suddenly worried, “You didn’t see Y/n?”

“Y/n? No, I haven’t seen her all day.” Peter and Natasha shared worried looks. Panic began to rise in Peter’s stomach.

Natasha took control and laid a hand on his shoulder, “Maybe she was in the elevator. Friday?”

“It would seem that Ms. y/l/n is no longer in the building.”

“What?!” Peter yelled, “Where is she?”

“I do not know, sir.” Peter wobbled on his feet slightly.

Tony stepped out of his suit and walked to the end of the table, “Friday pull up her last known whereabouts on the feed.”

A picture came up showing Y/n entering the elevator. Then the elevator stopped and the lights went out, casting the entire video into darkness. The lights stayed off longer than they should have before they came back on. No emergency red lights were seen, and Y/n was gone.

Peter couldn’t breathe. He heard people talking to and around him but he couldn’t grasp a word they were saying. A small hand laid on his shoulder but he just shrugged it off. His eyesight was blurry and his center of gravity was off. He doubled over, hands resting on his knees as his breaths came out labored.

“Guys… I think he’s gonna—” Wanda didn’t get to finish her statement as he fell to the side and Steve lunged to catch him before he hit the ground.

~.~

Peter’s head hurt when he woke up. He could tell he was in his bed, but he couldn’t remember how he got there. His jeans were still on and he had a cold sweat over his body. When everything came rushing back, he sat up with a jolt.

“Friday! Friday! Where’s everybody?!” Peter scrambled to find his suit in the mess of his room, “We need to find Y/n. She’s in danger.”

“Mr. Parker, the avengers are out looking for her right now. I was instructed to let you know and advise you to stay here. You passed out from shock and fear, they presume.” Peter calmed down slightly as he heard that the avengers were out but he wished it was himself instead.

“Have... have they found her?”

“I can patch you through to boss if you would like me to?”

Peter thought about it for a moment, “No… that’s okay.” He breathed deeply before pushing his hair away from his face, “they’re the strongest people on earth. They’ve got this.” Peter stood up from his bed and walked into the common room. He hated being alone in the tower, always had. It was just too empty and quiet compared to when everyone was gathered together. He had just settled on the couch and turned on the TV when a live broadcast took over.

“Spider-man… I have something you want.”

Ch 3

a/n: sorry that was a short chapter, the next is much longer

taglist: @awkwardfangirl2014 @givinggoodvibes

#marvel #spiderman #peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker fanfic #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader fanfiction #peter parker x reader fanfic #peter parker x reader imagine #peter parker marvel #marvel fanfiction #marvel fanfic #marvel imagine #spiderman fanfiction #spiderman fanfic #spiderman imagine #tom holland #emma writes #masterlist input

[mysamcedesmadness]

So, What Are We Doing This Summer?

It was called to my attention that Henry's age was confirmed as 17 in either the Frittle episode or his birthday episode (I've not repeatedly watched those, so I didn't remember), which would either put them in their senior year or put Henry as a graduating 18 year old next year, which does happen, so I'll go with that.

Also, for some reason, all of the italics and bolds and such disappear whenever I paste to Tumblr. I honestly don’t feel like redoing tonight, but the ffnet post has them, for various emphasis on words and stuff, if that’s a better read for you.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13274210/7/So

So, What Are We Doing This Summer?

There was no Sweet Sixteen thing that she wanted to do. To be fair, her parents wanted to throw her something and invite her friends over, but she just wanted a nice dinner, some cake, maybe a museum trip and to look over college packets. Last birthday, she went to a show that she wanted to see with her friends, but it was such a hectic night that she almost didn't get to see it.

That's how plans with the friends tended to go. Unexpected and hectic. So, Sweet Sixteen, she was doing things with her parents! And that was all that there was to it!

"But, what about the time WE want to spend with you?" Jasper asked.

She furrowed her eyebrows and handed him a pamphlet. "Here. Underline cons in red, highlight pros in pink."

"What is this?"

"College brochures."

"Why are you looking at college brochures, we still have more than a year of high school left?"

She laughed, "And I very well can't figure out what schools to apply to after graduation. Senior year student council has so much to do for all of those senior ceremonies, I want to make sure I've given myself time to think about where I'm going."

"Why not Swellview University?" He wondered.

"It's on my list, but not my top choice. I want an HBCU or an Ivy League school."

"I'm gonna go right there to Swellview U. It's a good school!"

"I'm sure it's great. It's just not exactly what I want," she said and they heard the sound of Captain Man and Kid Danger coming down the tubes.

She smiled at them as they approached, resuming some kind of debate. "Dude, there's no way that a giant pancake could best a giant waffle. The waffle has ridges!" Henry fussed, then kissed her on the cheek.

"What are you two even TALKING about?"

"Animated and animatronic breakfast foods," Ray said, popping gum into his mouth. "Henry thinks that sausage would be more of a romantic than bacon and that a giant waffle could defeat a giant pancake in a fight to the death, covered in butter and syrup!"

"HOW do these subjects get started?" Charlotte wondered as they changed back.

"What about a crepe?" Jasper wondered.

Henry and Ray both laughed and repeated, "Crepe?"

"Oh yeah, a giant CREPE can fight!" Ray taunted.

Henry added, "Guess it's gonna just roll up to the scene, since he's gonna lose his innards if he steps up." The duo fell on each other laughing. Jasper sighed and shook his head.

"I'm not sure why you entered their weird little world."

"Third Wheel Syndrome has me sensitive, I think."

Henry took a seat next to Charlotte and asked Jasper, "What do you mean?"

"Since the two of you got together, I'm feeling left out," Jasper admitted.

"How? I just spent four hours stuck in a vat of scrambled eggs and country gravy. You and Char have been here going through…" he picked one up from in front of Charlotte and she sucked her teeth. "College brochures." He set it down, "Jasp you're leaving for college too?"

"No. I'm marking pros and cons for Charlotte. I'm going to Swellview University. We talked about this."

"I know! I was gonna be super upset if you were gonna run off on me. Bad enough she will be." He pointed a thumb to Charlotte.

"What happens when that happens?" Jasper wondered.

"It's at least a year in the future. We haven't even discussed what we're doing this summer," Charlotte said. The three were quiet for a moment. Ray and Schwoz were talking among themselves a few feet away.

Henry broke the collective silence between their trio by asking, "So, what are we going to do this summer"

"There's my birthday.." Jasper said then squinched his face and shook his head, "You weren't talking to me, were you?"

"I was talking to you both. Anybody have plans already?"

"I never have plans," Jasper said, almost certain that Henry was definitely only talking to Charlotte.

She said, "Same old same old for me. Summer Youth Program in June. Beginning of July trip with my parents. The only thing different this year is I'm going to add three or four campus tours of whichever colleges have the least cons and most pros."

"Need company?" Henry wondered. She furrowed her eyebrows and actually looked up at him. "Just to you know, make sure that you enjoy yourself despite the work."

"I love college tours. I'll enjoy myself," she said.

Henry pouted, "Fine." She looked questioningly at the sky about his salty tone, but left it alone. Henry sighed, "Jasper, do you think you'll want to spend any time with me this summer?"

"I thought you'd never ask!" Jasper cheered. Charlotte rolled her eyes. She hadn't said that she wasn't going to spend any time with him.

In fact, her visits would be four weekends from the entire summer. Her Youth Program was on Thursdays. Her trip was two weeks. Aside from that, she was pretty sure she'd see both of these clowns every other summer moment. She'd tuned out the boys making plans without her whenever she heard Jasper declare, "It's gonna be super hard for us to do these things whenever you and Charlotte are married and stuff."

Henry shook his head and Charlotte chimed in, "Whenever what?"

Jasper reminded her, "Remember that whole hashtag Henlotte thing?"

"That was a joke, Bro," Henry said, laughing a little uncomfortably. "Nobody actually thought that I was proposing or that we were gonna be kissing. That's why it was so hilarious."

"Yeah, but you are kissing. You kiss a lot. You're together. Charlotte's thinking about her upcoming colleges before junior year end. Do we really believe she's not thinking beyond that?" Henry's head turned sharply and quickly to Charlotte.

She scoffed and said, "Don't look so panicked. As it turns out, I've been focused enough on my educational future that I haven't been circling anything in bridal books on the off chance that my boyfriend ever wants to me to participate in the antiquated institution of marriage."

Henry sighed, relieved, "Oh thank God. Wait. So… You never wanna get married, at all? To anybody?"

"Honestly, it's never crossed my mind. I've had one stupid boyfriend and I'm only 16. Why I would daydream about becoming someone's less respected partner is beyond me."

"Less respected?" Jasper repeated.

But Henry was stuck on "Stupid boyfriend?"

Charlotte snatched her brochures from Jasper and explained, "Married women are taken less seriously than their married male counterparts in the corporate world. Whether I go into STEM, academia, politics, business, or even if my degree proves useless and I wind up regretting decisions in retail - women are already valued less and when you add a wedding ring, they're expected to be full time workers and full time homemakers while Daddy retreats into his little solo space to unwind after his hard day's work. And don't let her become a mom! She doesn't get the necessary time off to be the kind of mother that everyone expects. Simultaneously, whatever kind of mother she is, the workplace thinks is too much." She was stuffing her bag and then looked at Henry, "And for the record, just because I haven't thought about it doesn't mean that I need your graphic depictions of relief about it!" She snatched her bag and headed for the elevator.

Jasper called out, "Okay, but that explanation of the workplace tells that you've definitely thought about it."

She glared at him and snapped, "That information is common knowledge to women!"

As the elevator door shut, Henry looked confused. "So.. Am I supposed to be thinking about marriage, or not?"

"I think that you shouldn't be, because Charlotte doesn't have marriage plans, but maybe if it crosses your mind, try to not seem repulsed by Charlotte being your wife? Her execution of the subject was all over the place."

"The place of lies," Ray said. "Women wanna get married. It's their reward for being good girlfriends!"

"That's a gross oversimplification of like everything involved in what you said," Henry commented. "Honestly, now that I think about it, Charlotte has literally never mentioned anything about weddings or marriage or anything like it. Not even so much as a "I'll play this song someday at my wedding."

Ray commented, taking a seat by Henry, "That's probably because she's been resigned to the fact that nobody's ever gonna marry her. I mean, she's the worst, amirite?"

"You're not," Jasper said, at the same time Henry said, "No."

"So, either of you can picture having Charlotte there, every single day, nagging you, telling you what to do, why this is unsafe or that's unwise?"

"That sounds like every day of my life since 5th grade," Jasper said.

"Yeah! Char is the smart one. We all know that. We need someone like that everyday!"

Ray muttered, "Still the worst."

"What is your problem with Charlotte?" Henry asked, exasperated."I mean, what if this does go different for us than my other relationships and it winds up being something real and lasting. Do I always have to worry that you're gonna be a butt to her?"

Ray laughed, "Yeah. I've known this was coming for a long time. I'm not treating her any differently no matter what status you have. Because as far as I'm concerned you've always been endgame… Also, she's the worst."

"Because she forces you to have to be better?" Jasper wondered.

Ray groaned and mumbled, "For your information, yes."

.

Charlotte came home and her uncle was on the couch, watching TV. What else was new? "Hey, Uncle Roscoe.

"Hey, Niece! You wanna watch the Kids Danger cartoon with me?"

"No. I've gotta look over college info so Mom and Dad will be able to plan my visits in between their orchestras and excavations. Speaking of, are they out tonight?"

"The Swellview Opera House. Your mom says there's a casserole just for you in the oven. Don't worry, I don't want whatever that is. I'm ordering a pizza." She nodded, disappointed that she wouldn't be able to discuss her college choices with them tonight. "You wanna watch one of your wedding dress shows?" Uncle Roscoe wondered.

"No."

"Not even Say Yasss, This is Your Drass?" He turned off the TV and wondered, "What's wrong, Tiny?"

"Sometimes, I feel like an outsider. Even in my own home and even with my only friends. Like, we're all sharing this one life, but nobody's on the journey with me and those that are on the journey, we're not on the same page."

"You know, I was an outsider like that too. Shoot, still to this day, as a starving artist."

"How can you be starving when you live here and eat everything we have?"

“I ain’t eat that grass casserole your mom made you.”

“I’m sure you mean bean sprouts,” she said, “And that’s not the whole casserole…” The doorbell rang and she looked at him. He reached for the remote control and she gave him a look. “I’ll get it.” She went to the door and by the time she peeked out of the peephole to see Henry nervously bouncing, Uncle Roscoe was laughing at something on the television. She called, “I’m gonna step outside and talk to my friend, Unc.”

“Girl, I’m watching my shows,” he said. Basically, he didn’t care.

She opened the door and stepped outside. Henry laughed, “Your friend? Something you need to tell me?” He joked, awkwardly. “What do you need, Henry?” She asked, sounding irritated.

“I need to explain what happened earlier.”

“Okay.”

“So… Jasper was talking about marriage and we’ve never spoken about that, because neither of us are thinking that far ahead into us. But, whenever I seemed relieved, it wasn’t because I think I’d never wanna marry you or something. I just thought that we were both in the same space - a space where that’s not even a conversation yet. So, I’m sorry if I sounded insulting to you.”

She shrugged her shoulders, “We rushed really fast into the entire boyfriend-girlfriend thing. There’s no need for us to rush anything into anything else. So, it’s fine.”

“But, you seemed upset.”

“Yeah. For the reason that I told you, but it’s not a big deal. Honestly, I have other things to be upset about. Maybe it just landed on you. So, I’m sorry.”

"You wanna talk about your things?" He asked.

She sighed and leaned against the front door. "You know how my parents and I go on a trip every summer together?"

"Yeah?"

"This year is the last one. Next year, they're sending me on a solo trip after graduation to see the world myself before college."

"That sounds awesome."

"But, I hardly see them now and I just want them to go over the pros and cons of these colleges with me. I know that sounds silly to other people, but it's a huge decision to make and I wish sometimes that they'd be more involved instead of just trusting my judgement. They raised me to be independent and they don't realize that sometimes, I could use just a little dependency, you know?"  

Henry nodded, "Yeah, I get that. I haven't been able to depend on my parents in quite a while. But… I've always been able to depend on my friends. So, if you just need someone to lean on, I literally have nothing better to do than here for you." Henry offered her a hug and she smiled a small smile and accepted it. When she was hugging him, he said, "And it'd be excellent, I think… some time in the far future… you know?" She looked up at him. "IF we were thinking about that."

She nodded, "If I was gonna sell myself out in that way, it'd be with my best friend." He laughed. "I meant everything that I said about marriage! The only way that I'd be on board is if it was handled like a business arrangement with someone I trust."

"You trust like two people," he chuckled.

"Yep. And they'd both be IN the marriage."

"Me and???"

She stared at him and suggested, "Think it through."

"OH, YOU!"

"I already regret this unofficial contract."

"Fortunately, we've got a long time to even think about that. We haven't even discussed..  the physical evolution of our relationship." Her eyes widened and she wondered if he was talking about what she thought he was. He noticed and quickly changed the subject, "Or what you and me are doing this summer!"

She relaxed and nodded, "Aside from the few weeks, four weekends and Thursdays, I'm all yours…"  He raised an eyebrow. "I mean, I'm open! I mean my time is free! I have a casserole to check on. I gotta get inside!" She rushed back in, shut the door and Henry shook his head and left. "Why would bring that up, Henry? She was already having a day. I mean, sure.. you wanna discuss it. But, you haven't been together that long and it was a FLUKE that you even got her. This happened kinda haphazardly. You're gonna screw it up if you keep being weird!"

Charlotte leaned against the door, breathing hard. Are… we THERE yet??? She glanced out of the window and saw Henry look back at the house before walking away with his head down. A few minutes later, she got a text: Hey. Sorry if I scared you bringing up THAT. I won't mention it again. I don't want stuff weird between us. Call me when you don't feel awkward.

She sighed with relief and replied instantly: Thanks, Hen. You're a great friend and honestly the best boyfriend.

Henry: Not stupid boyfriend?

Charlotte: Not at all. ILU

Henry: SAME.

#So I Had a Dream #So What Are We Doing This Summer #chenry #henry danger #hd fanfic