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buildingrelationshipsinanarchy · 4 years

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A New Intimacy Model

So what spurred this project is a culmination of a few things. Namely, frustration with the imprecise and incomprehensible words, Platonic, Romantic, and Sexual. The English language hasn’t been great at adapting the words for personal relationships as our times and values change.

I fell into Anarchism only very recently, stumbling into the language of ‘relationship anarchy’ through the internet in discussion with forms of polyamory years ago when I started this blog. Over the last year, I’ve been getting into radical politics and finding how my un-politicized opinions were validated, and then stretched the more I learned and studied up. While I’m still learning more about Radical politics, Anarchism, Marxism, Queer and Feminist theory specifically, the more I wanted to link some of my perspectives on intimate relationships with these political and theoretical texts.

“The Personal is Political.” - Carol Hanisch, Feminist Author.

@mythr1der wrote a post detailing a bit of the frustration I also share in regards to how the Dichotomy between Platonic and Sexual (which almost all definitions of Romance boil back into), leave much to be desired when discussing attraction, desire, intimacy and relationships in general. I believe that this very simple dichotomy reflects, oddly enough, capitalism and the history of the role of state power in culture. I rant a little bit about it as a response to @mythr1der‘s post here.

It’s long, and incomplete, but I proposed an idea of just building entirely new words, so we can build an entirely new map for talking about love, desire, attraction, and relationships that actually discuss what its like to be next to someone you like to be next to!

What is intimacy? It’s closeness right? To be near some ‘intimate’ part of another person, or them near something meaningful about why you’re you. I wanted to start this series by talking about what it means to be close to someone. If you remember my birthday without Facebook, that might make me feel a bit special. But if you remember how badly I was abused by an old friend, its because I trusted you enough to share some of the sadness that I’m not as loud about.

Intimacy isn’t always trauma, sometimes its tears of joy hearing that your cousin is out of prison, or the laughter of your friends. Being close to each other in a hyper-digitized age is a bit tricky, but phone calls, facetime, snapchat are only some of the tools we use to keep each other updating on what we’re feeling. Whether its about our love life, sex life, work life, or home life, just sharing that information can be real special, and bonding.

When we say that we have friends or that we are [Queer] Platonic Partners, does that mean we’ve decided how often we’re gonna talk or what we’re gonna talk about? What if we just send each other memes or rant about politics? Am I supposed to devalue those interactions because they aren’t the person I’m crying on the phone with?

Intimacy can be as deep as childhood scars and as simple as surprising me with my favorite snack. It all just means you know who I am, what I like, and what I care about. I want to intentionally forge those connections. And this why I set these definitions first.

Other Words:

A Daekkon (n.) would be person/partner whom you’ve developed intentionally this kind of relationship with.

If you desired this kind of relationship with a certain person, you’d be feeling Daekeen (adj.) for/about that person.

People who are desiring or actively doing these activities together are Daekkoning (v.).

This would be understood as Daekkonic (adj.) behavior; as in, “My roomate isn’t super talkative with me, but is deakkonic (adj.) with Sandra from the Mosque.”

“Tom is going through it, he’s felt deakkonically (adv.) deprived since the move.”

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In our sex-negative, ironically repressed culture, we seem to think that if you’re touching your bodies together at all, it means *something*. I want to remove that idea. I want to reclaim physical affection. I want to be touch and be touched by others. I don’t want my afab friends who have experienced some sort of sexual violence in their lives, to ever feel weary about the fact that I’m physically affectionate. It’s been my #1 Love Language for the last 10 years.

Fighting r*pe culture is a full-time fight, but I think adding a word, and therefore an idea[l], can be useful in reclaiming safety, and boundaries regarding bodily autonomy, for all of us. Clear communication and respected boundaries and asking consent for everything are the bedrock we need to continually practice. And as trust builds, I believe this could be very useful theoretically tool for improving the quality of our relationships and help create clearer discussion about our individual boundaries, needs, and desires. I feel like this leads me to a relevant question. What activities are inherently platonic, romantic or sexual? Is holding hands inherently romantic when almost all of us have done it with a friend? What about those of us who are religious or spiritual and have held hands with members of church, mosque or synagogue; do you think we’re out here non-stop blushing at the Pastor? Or when we held hands with family members? Doesn’t sound like it holds up, huh?

What about snuggling a roommate? Holding a teammate while celebrating a victory? The kiss my bestfriend gave me on our shared birthday dinner? Are we left to through our Aro and Ace friends’ out of the discussion, just because our culture has bad takes on sex and romance as the only forms possible of significant physical touch? Physical touch is such an important way to communicate love and affection, as well as care, concern, and comfort. They don’t get to cast their shadow on this space anymore!

Other Words:

If you had this desire for someone, or wanted to approach cultivating these forms of affection in a relationship, you could say you’re feeling Phaddish (adj.) for that person.

.Participating or initiating acts of a non-sexual physical intimacy Phadronic (adj.) quality are said to be phade-ing/phading (v.).

A Phadrone (n.) could be the name of a person/partner you share this kind of relationship with.

Phadroning (v.) would the act of cultivating this kind of intimacy with another person.

Phadronically (adv.) could describe a certain level of intimacy implicit in a physical touch between to particular people.

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Now lets talk about Sex. That’s the thing the everyone’s mind always gravitates to when discuss words like, intimacy, attraction, desire. It’s the thing we want to stay away from when you use the Platonic or Friendly. But, lets be real. Haven’t many of us had sex with people didn’t even consider friends? Or people who became our “Strictly Platonic” friends after we may have had sex, once or several times, with them?

People who gravitate toward polyamory or non-monogamy tend have had a “hoe-phase.” The boundary between friend and lover, or partner and fuckbuddy have been blurred in a good chunk of people’s lives. Non-monogamous or not, I think it’s useful to talk directly about our sexual experiences, desires, fantasies, and how different it can be with different people, or in different stages of our lives. But what makes an experience sexual? Maybe that sounds redundant or obvious; I mean, it’s got the word SEX in it, maybe that’s got something to do with it? But maybe not...

Lets ask an odd question. Is sex inherently sexual? Who wouldn’t assume the answer is automatically yes? Well, my first thought is to talk to those in the Adult Entertainment industry or friends of ours who are sex-workers, in whatever capacity. Is every client sexy or shoot erotic? Those of us who have sex, have we never been doing it and been bored through most of at least one experience?

If sex is inherently sexual, why do we have so many Sexual Health Educators, Marriage Counselors, Pornstars, Yoga Teachers, Personal trainers and Writers telling us how to have sexy sex? Dating Coaches and Websites, telling us how we are getting something that’s supposed to sound so easy wrong.

I’ve come to the opinion that sex isn’t about body parts, genitalia, certain body motions, or even clothing [or lack thereof]. I believe that sex, or eroticism, is all about the context and the people involved. There’s nothing inherently sexy about fruit, or food in general, but if woman eats a banana in public, there are at least several men in area thinking of something than her healthy food choices.

This is why talking about sex directly is good. And understanding it as an energy that you imbue to any activity or circumstance, could help have better sex; and and on the flip-side, show us how we may need to more aware of how we may take up space with our body language. I do also feel, that in part, some of our Ace friends (those who aren’t sex repulsed), may be able to find some resonance with this model; sex doesn’t have to feel passionate or any particular way at all (other than good?), because sex isn’t about sexiness, but about human connection and pleasure.

Other Words:

Serotic (adj.) activities include any activity that is engaged due to, or is infused with, sexual desire and/or erotic intention. It also describes the type of desire you’re feeling for another person.

A Serato (n.) is any person you engage in serotic activities or feelings with.

An activity that was originally un-serotic (adj.), but became sexually or erotically charged, we could described as having become Serotically (adv.) charged.

When you are cultivating or charging an act with serotic energy, you are Seroticizing (v.) that activity

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Lately, especially since diving into Radical Politics, I find less and less desire in defining Who I Am as a part of a relationship unit. It’s an overlay from monogamy, The Couple being the only social unit that is recognized, as it’s necessary to the Nuclear Family; a super important thing for Capitalism to sustain itself. The relationships I cultivate with others, with whatever forms of intimacy or interactions therein, cant be understood by that model. I am more than my interactions with a handful of people; I am a human person, and my engagement with the world isn’t actually reducible to whether or not I’m having sex with someone or not.

We’ve talked about multiple forms of intimacy, and some of the desires or interests associated with them. Have you noticed that in the desire, or need, to discuss relationships on a basis of, ‘sex: yes or no?’, that we haven’t talked about the webs that form because we are all reliant on each other to survive? Not everyone in your community or workplace or online spaces, you’ll get to know or talk to. Do they, as people, matter less because they aren’t in your contacts list or your DM’s?

This is a space where not a lot of us to tend think or engage as much. An easy word to discuss this space is community. But is a community the people or the place you spend your time, whether online or off? Is the community the place you live and your neighbors? Is it the people who may share some of your identifiers or face similar forms of oppression, despite living in a different city, state, country?

We are multi-dimensional beings, and with the use of technology, there are so many ways to form relationships, and share resources. I think the ‘community’ is any space you find yourself in, which means that mutual aid is something you are always able to engage in. Whether it’s feeding the homeless guys who hang out by the intersection, or dropping a few bucks in a trans kid’s venmo, mutual aid is so much easier.

But what if that feels so inconsequential? It’s not! But it does, from time to time, feel like the problems of the world are so big, and that you and so many you know are suffering in ways you wish you could help. Well, community organizing is always happening somewhere, online and off. It becomes important to join up with others in order feel like we can actually make a positive impact on the lives of others. We don’t have to wait on a government who’s interest isn’t ours, don’t have to wait for some politician to fail on a promise to Make Things Better.

We have each other, and we are all we really have. At the end of the day, all of our concepts are man-made. COVID-19 showed us how drastically things could be different if the people in power made decisions that actually benefited us. A lot of us understand the need to do something. Capitalism says that competition is what drove human kind into evolution, the fight for survival in a meaningless, terrifying world. Anarchism, as I’m learning, throws the whole idea in the trash where it belongs.

Peter Kropotkin, whose been called both the Godfather and Santa Claus of Anarchism, penned in Mutual Aid: A Factor of Evolution (1902), “under any circumstances sociability is the greatest advantage in the struggle for life.”

We are better off together. Capitalism and the property relationships in our compulsively monogamous society try to tell us other wise. We don’t have to follow that model.

Other Words:

To Mudshop (v.) is to build a mudship with a particular person, organinzation, or community; Mud-shopping (v.).

A Mudshipper (n.) is an individual in a mudship of any scale.

I’ve said a lot. I hope this reads as accessible to as many people as it can be. I built this because I want to tell the people in my life why I love them as dearly as I do. And that I’d love to build relationships with as many awesome, lovely people as I can.

If you try to use the words Romantic and Platonic while you look at this post, and find it almost impossible, I’ve done my job.

I hope those words die along with oppressive ideas they uphold.

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ddaenghoney · 4 years

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chapter twelve

masterlist link in blog description.

As a successful songwriter, you want nothing more than the acknowledgment that the chart-topping musical pieces are your own creations. But contracts, relationships, and the difficulty of facing the stakes involved head on, keep your mouth shut until pressure builds too much.

Pairing(s): Park Jimin x Y/N, Min Yoongi x Y/N

disclaimer: any characters depicted do not represent the actual personality of the respected idol in real life.

Series warning(s)/genre(s): Chapter-based written fic, Slow-burn relationship(s), Fake-dating, Unrequited love, Songwriter/producer!oc, idol!Jimin, idol/songwriter/producer!Yoongi, friends with benefits, drama, romance, smut, angst, fluff (updated as needed)

Chapter warning(s): mentions of anxiety and themes of anxiety from slight claustrophobic environment.

Word count: 5463

if you enjoy please, please let me know!

You click the volume button on your phone to raise the playlist’s sound to comfortable blur of the world around. More particularly, to avoid any verbiage from entering your eardrums when you are already too aware of how much attention you bring to yourself. Rationalizing that your presence at the airport makes sense given your public relationship with Yoongi, you simply scroll through a feed of posts on Instagram to bide time, waiting for an arrival text.

Yoongi told you not to come when you told him as he boarded his flight home that you’d be there to greet him. Explaining that it’s dangerous to your safety considering the amount of crowds sure to welcome him as well with the flight back being public, Yoongi said he’d go see you from the airport instead. You would’ve agreed had the whole ordeal not been requested hours earlier in a direct email from Yerin.

“Ms.,” The sound muffles in your ears, more aware of the bodyguard’s request for your attention by means of a gentle pat on your shoulder. You remove an earbud, spine tingling at choice words that seemed amplified by the tall ceilings and shiny tile floor of the terminal. “He should be landing soon, when he enters, please make sure you follow our guidance to the vehicle instead of loitering. For your safety.”

You nod, feeling exceptionally feeble in this alien situation. Never in your life would you picture yourself waiting for someone of such high recognition in the middle of the airport at the top of a wall of fans held behind you by use of a flimsy metal barrier. Furthermore, you would not ever think the person would be a falsified boyfriend where your position in the crowd only drives irritated spikes constantly in your direction.

Granted, the majority of people waiting to spot Yoongi seem polite, and even yell back in your defense. Still, you didn’t necessarily want to be at the center of this type of attention. The guard next to you probably finds you being there just as annoying as you thought you’d be when you read the email’s demand-

“Look, he’s here!”

Like the shot to start a race, the one discernable exclamation causes a frenzy of calls. The barrier budges only slightly, impact stopping as sensibility takes over and the hundred or so people try to act as civil as possible given the circumstances.

You clutch your phone tighter in your grasp, glancing back at them all as they scream different things to gain attention, but your eyes go back to the opening doors. Along with other passengers getting as far away from the mayhem as possible, Yoongi walks out with the inherent entourage of staff and guards.

Your smile is incredibly forced because of the nerves rumbling in your throat from the amount of people and volume, but then altogether the expression fades away as Yoongi just nods in a direction for you to follow them down the premade path to the awaiting SUV. Gathering he’s irritated by the added hysteria of you being there, you move towards him quickly, grabbing hold of the hand he extends out for you, but it becomes abandons as well. Instead replaced by Yoongi’s arm worming around your waist to pull you closer to his stature as the crowds get more vivid on account of paparazzi waiting towards the doors.

Your newly free hands find purchase quickly gripping onto the fabric hanging off of Yoongi’s torso, nervously following his pace as the bright flashes stun your senses. Biting roughly on your lip, you feel the bumps from security, hear the constant shouts of attention for both of you, and try your best to ignore it all, repeating that it’ll end soon.

The car doors are open long before the two of you reach them. Yoongi nudges you ahead at last moment to let you inside first, following in quickly afterward with the door shutting just as swiftly. You exhale air held in your lungs as your hands fiddle with one another in your lap, trying to ease as the car departs.

“Are you okay?” Yoongi raises the armrest of his seat to turn, knee nearly bumping your own seat while his eyes scan over your person. “I wish you would’ve told Yerin no-- that-” He points to the back of the car where road trails behind you both, head shaking, “is scary enough for anyone, but making you wait there for me for hours?” He scoffs, rubbing his bangs back from his face, “Bullshit. You shouldn’t have had to go through that, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

Quiet lingers in the air, Yoongi’s chest rising and emptying a bit more visibly from the angered rant. He waits for you to respond, still eyeing your figure for outward signs of distress from the crowds. You eventually nod your head,

“Not a fan of that all.” Your voice feels grated, must sound so too as Yoongi frowns at you in response. He glances to your hands balled in your lap, still fidgety for relief with one another. Wordlessly he reaches for them both, taking them within his larger appendages. Rubbing gently, Yoongi also nods his head to your conclusion. “I’m sorry if it made you upset I was there though.”

“I’m not mad about that.” Yoongi mumbles easily in response, keeping contact for himself because of how your hands feel between his. Naturally, he hates that invasive part of fame, finding it anxiety inducing for multiple reasons. “It just bothers me you had to be around all of the crowds and deal with that.”

“I’m okay.” You convince him with a small voice, that also helps your own psyche to hear aloud. A faint smile curls on Yoongi’s lips as he lifts his gaze back to yours, silently telling you that you didn’t need to pretend. Your shoulder shrugs because it’s not a complete lie. “You’re here. I’m okay.”

Yoongi’s lips pursed at your tiny admission, appearing to grow satisfied with the words, but his head ducks shyly. The balling connection of your hands feel only a little tighter because of a flustered squeeze by Yoongi, “If you say so then...”

“Oh,” You interrupt the moment to shift on your seat, facing Yoongi when he looks back to you in a focused surprise. “Can we go to my apartment? I have the cake.” You grin as you watch Yoongi’s eyes light up in remembrance of the jovial promise you made to him before leaving. His lips curl, visibly peeking teeth as he chuckles at the excitement and pride you emit from the endeavor,

“Who am I to say no to cake?” ---

“Ignore all the papers on the-- what’s supposed to be-- dining table. I’m the worst at keeping it clean.” You mutter as you type in the code for your front door, ignoring Yoongi’s light laughter because in reality you’re internally thinking about how much of a mess you left the rest of the place. Pushing the door open, you scan the room as Yoongi follows you inside. Incidentally, it’s not that awful, but the table is as much of a disorganized array of papers, notebooks, and other stationary that you knew it would be.

“You can put your backpack on the armchair, or anywhere.” You gesture to your living area, before walking along to the kitchen space on the side opposite the table.

“I’m going to end up falling asleep on the couch if I get too close to it.” Yoongi admits in a joking murmur as he places his bag beside the entrance to your door instead, stretching out his arms when they’re free of the weight.

“Wait, yeah, you’re probably really tired, huh?” You frown as you pull out the cake from the refrigerator, turning to place it on the small island. “I’m sorry, I should’ve let you go home and sleep-” “I’m okay,” He says with a smile, though your frown remains because of sleepiness in his eyes as Yoongi meets you in the kitchen. “Besides I’m just going to make my sleep schedule worse if I let myself go to sleep at two in the afternoon.” He tilts his head, smile tugging on his lips as you continue to frown up at him dissatisfied with the situation. “Quit pouting, I’m okay.”

“I’m not pouting.” You mumble, averting your gaze to the cake, fingers lazily playing with the container’s lid. The movement halts as Yoongi’s chuckling rings in your ears followed by his thumb prodding the plush of your cheek, calling your eyes back to his.

“You’re literally pouting.” Yoongi’s voice is quieter than it needs to be, despite its playful intonation as he studies your expression with gleaming fondness seemingly in his irises. You tighten your lips into a line, listening to the silence while the imaginary sound of your heart tries to pretend it’s accelerating audibly. “I can sleep later; I wanted to see you, Y/N, it’s not a big deal.” His arm falls back to his side as Yoongi looks to the container, catching the pink frosting’s pigment visible through the blur of the container’s texture. “Don’t judge me if I eat this entire thing, by the way.”

“Are you hungry?” Your soft tone is contrastingly teasing paired with a smile as Yoongi makes a tiny unintelligible noise followed by a mumble of falling asleep when they served food on the plane. You poke your finger into his side, giggling instantly as he jerks from you and grabs your hand. His eyes are wide, startled when he looks back at you, appearing utterly and dramatically offended that you tickled him beneath his ribcage. “Grilled cheese sound good?”

A grilled cheese layered with deli meat and quickly sauteed veggies and a full slice of cake make Yoongi sigh with contentment as he relaxes back into your couch. You watch with amusement as the amount of carbohydrates weigh down his eyes more than before. Chewing on the final bite of cake he insisted you had to eat as well or else it wouldn’t be a real celebration, you set your empty plate to the coffee table clattering its edge barely against Yoongi’s. “You and Namjoon are great at cooking.”

“It was just a sandwich.” You play off the compliment, thinking back to the first year of Namjoon’s cafe opening where you helped him out a lot more than nowadays that it is settled.

“The best one ever.” Yoongi goes on, eyes closed while he lounges back on the cushion, smiling when he hears you scoff in disbelief, yet with gratitude. The show’s sound lingers in the background of your perception, as you ponder calling him a cab so Yoongi could go properly rest. “You know you still haven’t told me about how the meeting with Yerin went.”

In the moment Yoongi brings up the topic you’ve done entirely well to avoid so far, you bite onto your bottom lip, shifting your stare aimlessly back to the television. Telling Yoongi that you’ve practically quit your job with no plan on how to get back on your feet afterward sounds like a way to get him to think you’re a little bit crazy, or at least very careless. When Namjoon found out he spent about ten minutes going back and forth from congratulating you without fervent emotion and staring at you like he was just as confused about what you would do as well.

You didn’t really want to go through that again, even if it is warranted due to their worry.

A hum vibrates your lips, thinking of a way to get him to altogether forget about this subject. Maybe if you put on a rain asmr playlist he’d fall asleep and you could abandon the country for a week to figure out an excuse of why you’re irrationally spoken decision in the meeting won out over something more civil. And resembling a continued livelihood.

“Was it bad after all?” Yoongi shifts on the couch beside you, legs coming up to sit criss cross as he faces you to better gauge your emotions. “You said you’d tell me about it when I got back since it wasn’t a big deal, but,” A tiny laugh leaks out with a contrasting mixture of nervous and attempt to keep the conversation’s ambience light-hearted. “Maybe not?”

“There’s just not much to say,” You begin vaguely, fingers in your lap fidgeting with one another as you figure out how to go about speaking, “They weren’t interested in changing my contract anymore than giving me a larger percentage of royalties so,” You shrug as the words trail away, thinking that you have no actual reason to find this difficult to admit. Yoongi wouldn’t be angry or judge you, but it felt embarrassing to say. Considering how financially secure your career at SoundWave keeps you, how could you just pull away from that to practically start over from the ground up?

“Ah,” Yoongi head nods in understanding. You glance towards him, watching him tossle around his locks and appear so groggy and without energy from the ten hour flight home. Yet he still seems intent to pay attention and hear what your situation is like now, to be beside you as you adapt to changes. “So you signed with them again.”

“I didn’t renew the contract.”

Without flinching, your eyes follow Yoongi’s head as it shoots up. No particular shock invades his appearance for a moment, just eyebrows creasing and a mutter, “You didn’t?” It’s as you nod slowly that his eyes begin to widen, lips parting in a shocked circle, then a repeat, “You didn’t.”

You swallow thickly, before cracked, small, practically soundless laughter leaves your lips as you just nod again. “I don’t know what I’m going to do.” Your words are hollow, different from how you casually spoke the facts to Namjoon a week ago. More caught up with the severity. Worried.

“Wait,” Yoongi frowns, rubbing his neck as he connects everything verbally, “They weren’t going to change the contract like you wanted, so you decided not to renew. You’re just going to be there until your contract ends?” Rambling continues along while you just nod in response. Eventually your own hands come up to hold your jaw as you mutter,

“Oh, I fucked up. I messed up, didn’t I?”

“No,” Unconvinced you look at Yoongi whose head shakes instantly, though there’s nothing about how his eyes stare at you that help you believe the response. “No, no-- you deserve credit, Y/N. You really do.”

“I’m not getting credit for anything at SoundWave.” You mutter, letting yourself fall on your side into the couch, straying from Yoongi just so he wouldn’t catch the consistent nervousness invading your expression. “I have to find a company-- work in general for songwriting or production with a blank resume.” You inhale, counting the seconds as the air sits in your lungs.

In the short gap of response you recall how much Yoongi has had to do for you so far. Always comforting your screw ups and dealing with the remnant dissatisfaction in your previous relationship. Now you lie on your couch, ranting your problems again, and hoping for something in response. You don’t do enough for him at all, yet you still lean on him like it’s his job to help you out.

You didn’t want to tell him about the meeting because Yoongi’s nice and he’d give you advice, spend his energy worrying for you as well. You shouldn’t misuse his kindness, especially when he has plenty of other responsibilities for his own job. You exhale the air, scooting further from him to rest your head on the plush of the armrest, “Yoon, just forget it. I’ll figure it out on my own somehow, you don’t need to listen to all of this crap.”

Yoongi blinks, frowning in dissatisfaction of the apparent worry, and your misplaced desire to push him out of your affairs for fear of it being annoying. “I’m not obligated, Y/N.” He waits a second to hear a response but receives nothing more than your legs curling slightly towards your chest. His hand presses into the couch, torso arching as Yoongi scoots to lean over, “What’s wrong with telling me?”

“I always rant about things to you.” Your eyes evade his own, though you’re very aware of the closer proximity due to the shadow he casts over you. “And you’re always, like, I guess accommodating to all the problems I have, and I bet it’s so old by now. You’re tired from your plane ride and I’m just stressing you out more.”

“You have to get this out of your head that you’re troubling me because of any of this, angel.” Yoongi’s voice resembles starlight, and the sentiment exuding shines in little spurts across your senses. Your mouth tightens into a line, just returning the slightest glance because you’re unsure why he’s this sweet to you. “I can’t imagine how nerve-wracking this is for you, but it’s okay to let people help you.”

“Do-” You cut yourself off, sighing as you head shakes a little. It’s past the time when you should be asking what you want to ask, but it feels acceptable to go on as Yoongi simply stays silent. To help encourage you further, his free hand rest overtop of yours, working to cast warmth. “Do you think I messed up, Yoon?”

Despite the uncertainty, despite this being the biggest decision you could have made for your career, the line of questioning doesn’t cause Yoongi a lot of thought. One could blame the blind optimism or inherent positivity of his closeness to you that makes him assume your success from here on is sure, but he doesn’t think that deeply about it. After all that you’ve created and produced musically, he simply believes everything will be okay for you, so he shakes his head. Smiling gently as his hand squeezes yours, he says all you could want to hear in that moment,

“Not at all. You stood up for yourself. That’s never wrong.”

It takes only a moment for a smile to begin flowering on your face, more on account of Yoongi’s convicted gaze that maintains a softness that you’re starting to believe is an unconscious talent of his. Nodding slightly, you sigh letting yourself heed his perspective, if only as a means to make yourself try and think as optimistically. In the very least, if you were able to make a career out of music, albeit not under the best circumstances, then you have as much of a chance to do it again.

“Maybe I always tell you everything because you always say something to make me happier.” The audible ponder causes a tiny prickling of heat to crawl along the back of Yoongi’s neck then flourish more so as you shift beneath him, properly looking up at him with a sincere smile. The situation between your bodies travels closer to the forefront of his mind, but Yoongi’s cheeks speckle with pink only because of your words’ effect.

“I’m glad you think that.” Yoongi speaks quietly, rich timbre touched with a fluster. You nearly giggle at the fact, but the candylike tone of his proceeding admission causes your chest to swell, “I’ll always try to make you feel better, whenever you need me to.”

His words are sweet like honey, inciting summer to crawl along your complexion. You swallow nothing, just finding the gaze he returns to your eyes completely entrapping, but more so like that of a hug. Your heart could gush from just the pleasantness of his voice.

“Yoongi,” You find nothing to say following calling his name, so instead your hands escape his singular grip so that you can cover your face, hiding away the erupting blush. “You’re-” You groan without irritation, prompting Yoongi’s eyes to widen in confusion. His lips curl into an inquisitive frown, altogether taken aback back by your flustered state. “You’re dangerous-- you’re too sweet. I can’t even believe you.”

“What?” He chuckles at your senseless mumbles where you lie beneath him. “Dangerous and sweet, that doesn’t make sense.”

“Right?” You peek from beneath your hands, nodding. “You’re a contradiction.” Masked away from his view is your smile as Yoongi continues in chuckles. You feel his body growing limp, likely tired from holding himself up on one arm for the duration of the conversation, and then sleepy on account of his earlier plane ride. “You should take a little nap, at least. I’ll wake you up, promise.”

“You think so?” He questions your ability to wake him up though not actually intending to challenge you. Yoongi’s body inevitably sinks atop of your own, and he intends to shift away until your hand lies on his bicep comfortably. He bites his lip, suddenly undesiring of moving, especially as you hum an affirmative to his rhetorical ask. “Aren’t I heavy?” A testing whisper. Gauging if you’re as settled with the position as he finds himself to be.

“No, I don’t think you are.” You brush away his nerves unknowingly, finally finding your own courage to let your free hand mesh very gently into his bleached locks. Trying to soothe him into a quick slumber you guide your fingertips play around rhythmically, only ceasing for a moment as Yoongi’s waist shifts just so that he can rest more comfortably. Also ensuring that the majority of his body weight doesn’t press onto you, but that’s about all he can manage until the ministrations of your fingers in his hair lull him out completely.

---

“What are you so worried about?” Yoongi stares blankly at the computer screen while Hoseok’s question on speaker phone rings through his ears. Analyzing the final touches on the side project of potential songs he’s made with you over the past couple of months, he finds himself unsettled looking at them. Your name brightly pixelated in parenthesis beside each title, and it only serves to irritate Yoongi to continue seeing it.

Not that he ever planned to release these songs, but now that they’re done and he’s well into consideration for what could come for you at the end of the month when your contract is officially finished, Yoongi can’t avoid the negative association of their presence in his computer’s library.

“She doesn’t know what she’s going to do, and even if she’s as talented as she is, it’s fucking hard to get any noteworthy company to give her chance, Hoseok.” Yoongi sighs, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his index finger. “I’m worried about her; she already shouldn’t be having to start over, but I can’t do anything to help her, and I couldn’t do anything to help you either.”

There’s a falter of replies, both parties finding themselves surprised at the final piece of the outburst.

“Yoongi-”

“I should’ve helped you.” The conversation shifts back into stagnation. Yoongi sighs again, rubbing his face as the expected reply comes after a long pause.

“I told you me getting fired is my own fault. You know the CEO already had crap against me. The situation with Seulgi just sealed the deal for him.” Hoseok’s voice reasons factually, as if those two simple reasons are enough to say being laid off from their old company makes any type of sense. “I don’t blame you for anything.”

“I do.” Yoongi doesn’t know if his voice is loud enough for Hoseok to hear, but he doesn’t repeat the admission. Recalling how simple it would’ve been to defend his friend, Yoongi taps his finger on his desk, then glances back up at his screen where your presence remains like a reminder of a year ago. Yet different from that time.

Yoongi feels no worry about his own career while he stares in thought of what to do about your own. Where he had to consider his actions in light of his stoic reputation in the public, he doesn’t think about that in the present. His manager would if Yoongi brought the issue up, likely be ready to shut down anything related to helping you in the eyes of the media and fans. Risking the long-running persona of SUGA for some unfortunate songwriter who made a misguided choice is impossible. Reasonably speaking, SUGA can’t help you without sticking the name in the middle of a potential scandal.

“It’s kind of funny hearing you so worried about her considering you only became friends from having to pretend to date.” Hoseok disrupts the stream of thought, bringing Yoongi back to reality. “She went and met you at the airport a couple of days ago, right? Saw it all over twitter.”

“Yeah,” Yoongi nods, then furrows his eyebrows at the memory of loud people and camera lenses in every direction around you as he walked into the lobby. “They made her go. Isn’t that fucked up? What if something happened?” He rubs his jaw, feet pushing him languidly side to side in his seat. “She’s not used to crowds like that-- it makes me mad-” Hoseok’s laughter stiffens Yoongi’s shoulders. Wondering what he said, Yoongi whines to cut into the laughter, “What?”

“You’re just really fond of her, huh?” Hoseok’s light voice makes Yoongi go quiet. Lips tighten into a line as he goes on. “I thought from the pictures that you became an actor overnight, but I guess that was really you being protective.”

Confused, Yoongi tilts his head in thought, trying to recall if he seemed particularly overbearing in the airport, but can only come to the conclusion that he had been trying to ensure you felt secure in the intense environment. He crosses his arms over his chest, humming when Hoseok questions aloud if the line went dead.

“What do you mean fond of her?”

“What?” Hoseok laughs again, but more so from amusement, spinning around in his desk chair on his side of the line, barely missing a collision with his knee on the corner of the table. “Bro, you know what I mean-”

“Wait,” Yoongi takes hold of his phone as loud thumping hits against his door followed by the ring of the doorbell. “I’ll talk to you later, I need to go.” Rolling his eyes at the dramatic, high-pitched whine Hoseok sends through the line, Yoongi ends the call, abandoning his phone on the desk as he gets up. Dotting through a quick list of potential visitors, he doesn’t recall anyone supposed to come, and knows it isn’t you because of your knowledge of the passcode.

“Hey,” One of the other producers greets Yoongi with a smile as he opens the door. A large, orange envelope in his hand waves into the air, “I was just bringing you some mail from the lobby while I was on the way to my desk.” He explains casually, prompting a nod from Yoongi albeit with smothered confusion on why the random producer is doing him a favor when they’ve barely ever worked together.

“Oh, thanks for that.” Yoongi sets aside the speculation, instead voicing appreciation as he takes the delivery.

“Yeah,” The guy’s reply falters, but Yoongi shakes it off to step back into his studio until the exchange continues further, “Actually, you’re close with Y/N now, right? Is it true she got fired?”

Inquisitive to the ear, but something deeper about the tone makes Yoongi’s eyebrows crease. He looks back towards the producer who meets his eyes with a now forced smile. Deciphering the intention as something negative, Yoongi’s head tilts in consideration of what he could be trying to get at. “Where’d you here that from?” “What? Oh,” He stutters, glancing towards the door frame as he shrugs, “You know, just gossip and all… I was just curious since she gets the most work, you know?”

Yoongi inhales remaining silent as he comes to understand this producer to be similar of a vulture. Likely others too are interested in receiving more work following your inevitable departure, but the insinuation of you being let go instead of quitting unsettles him. Irritating to hear. “I mean, it’s not just me curious,” He glances again away from Yoongi this time down the hallway where his eyes grow wide for a split second upon recognition, “Oh, like Jimin here-- hey, you’re wondering if Y/N got fired too, aren’t you?”

Yoongi steps a small step forward so he can lean his head and view down. Jimin appears confused at the question, hands in his pockets like he’d simply been walking to wherever.

“You heard she got fired, didn’t you-”

“Stop saying that.” Yoongi cuts into the producers loud voice, slicing them with an annoyed grit clinging to his words. “She didn’t get fired.” His arms cross over one another, envelope hitting against his side as he does so. Jimin’s movement causes Yoongi’s gaze to shift back towards him, expression etched with his upset temperment from the rude gossiping.

Jimin doesn’t say anything, slow steps like that of someone on a stroll, intending to walk past them both. The producer shifts a little distance away from Yoongi’s calm and heavy glare, watching with a stupor at the disposition that originally he hadn’t expected as a reaction to his questioning.

“It was just a question,” He mutters then nearly bites his tongue when Yoongi snaps his eyes back, “I just think it’d be pretty good for the company to vary more, that’s all-- she just works in the background anyways, it’s not like anyone would notice.”

“Hey,” Jimin interrupts the trail of irritated rebuttals about to leave Yoongi’s lips, eyes fixating into a glare towards the fidgeting producer, “She does more for the company than any of us do, so why don’t you stop talking shit and go actually work on something?”

“I,” The producer bites his lip, glancing nervously between Jimin and Yoongi, before nodding his head, “Yeah,” He turns on his heel, then startles backwards a few paces towards Jimin, eyes widening. “Oh, Y/N-”

The tension in Yoongi’s expression releases, stepping forward to let his studio door shut, revealing you barely more than a few feet from the three of them with two members of a girl group looking increasingly shocked and curious at the conversation at hand. He stays quiet, wondering how much of the guy’s stupidity you heard, but as he takes in your narrowed eyes he can freely assume enough.

“I didn’t get fired, I quit.” You say simply, voice devoid of civility. Glancing from the completely embarrassed producer to Yoongi then Jimin, you just sigh. Though you were aware this questioning would come eventually, you expected something more decent than gossip about people wanting to shift into your spot the second you leave the company. The two girls around you voice shocked questioning, but you pay no mind to them, “Next time you want to try gossiping about me, just ask me yourself; this is so ridiculous going behind my back for your own selfish gain.”

Jimin steps to the side as the producer nearly collides with him as he paces back another step, “You’re right, I’m sorry-- really.” You just scoff, watching him quickly scamper down the hallway so nothing more could be said.

“Wait, Y/N, you’re really leaving?” The youngest of the girl group members asks you with surprise, frown covering up her face. You just rub your face, nodding,

“Yeah, sorry; I have stuff to do.” You mumble in reply feeling a headache ready to come on from this whole stupid situation that is no doubt going to become increasingly invasive as this situation gets talked about around the company. You step towards Yoongi, turning to smile apologetically to the two girls, “It’s not a big deal, sorry.”

You hear the familiar sound of a clicking keypad and find the door opening as Yoongi takes the hint to let you inside. He steps inside first, holding the door open with his hand, as you go to follow and find yourself looking towards Jimin. Devoid of much expression his head just nods in a silent greeting to you and your find yourself doing the same without really noticing, going on to murmur quietly, “Thanks for speaking up for me, Jimin.”

Then you enter into Yoongi’s studio, realizing as the door clicks shut that Jimin finally did what you thought he never wanted to. Where in the past he’s only ever stood by silently while the company uses you to its own benefit, he today defended you without any need. Though you have no way of reasoning why he suddenly found it necessary to speak on your behalf, you find the fact that it occured a startling mixture of thankfulness and comfort.

Only it came too late.

if you enjoy please, please let me know via ask, comment, rb with tags– however ! i’d just really appreciate feedback 🥺 i hope you enjoy the series, i’m working really hard on it! : )

tag list (send an ask to be added): @jaiuneamesolitaiire @tsvkino-usagi @xionysus @baebyjoonie @honeyoongles

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xx-ingie-xx · 7 years

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Fortitude Update (+ an excerpt)

Ever since I started this “Epic Edit,” I’ve always approached the Fortitude revision(s) chronologically, refusing to proceed past a chapter until it was finished. Clearly this isn’t working very well, since I don’t always feel inspired to work in that order. So I tend to develop writer’s block and let the story sit there until my inspiration returns.

So I’m going to try a different approach. I’ll work in smaller sections, editing whatever part of whatever chapter inspires me. I will continue to update the chapters online in order, however, so a revision will sit on my computer until I’ve caught up to it. So I might update one chapter at a time, and then I might update three at a time, depending on my progress. Also, since this blog could reeeeally use some activity, I will also post edited parts as excerpts from time to time (hopefully frequently!).

I recently worked on a section of Chapter 31, after Zelda rushes to Aboda and tries to wake the people cursed with the Black Sleep. The conversation between her and Link has been changed for three reasons: 1) I think I crammed too many problems into one scene, 2) I wanted to minimize Link’s lecturing tone, and 3) I don’t like how I tried to fix the tension between them before Zelda is forced to flee Aboda. That tension is best left unresolved until after the fairy fountain scene. I also want to stress Zelda’s ongoing dilemma of being torn between her various responsibilities while also being limited in her options. These changes might not be obvious in one small excerpt, but here it is anyway. :)

The touch of a hand stroking my hair coaxed me out of slumber, and slowly I opened my eyes, confused to find myself lying in a soft bed. Link knelt beside me with his arms resting on the mattress, looking solemn and weary as ever.

“How are you feeling?” he asked me softly.

“Tired,” I said hoarsely. “But fine otherwise.”

“I didn’t want to wake you,” he said, “but the villagers have agreed to hold a cremation ceremony. I thought I should see if you’re able to attend.“

Cremation…?

Of course. Dread fell upon me as the fog of sleep lifted. For those we lost to the Black Sleep. Unless their bodies were cremated, they would eventually become the very monster that killed them.

Slowly I sat up and glanced out the window. “It’s already so late?”

Link moved to sit beside me on the bed. “Almost sunset. I let you rest as long as possible.”

I sighed and studied his profile. “Did they resist you at all?”

He shrugged. “It took some convincing, but that’s understandable.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”

“You’ve done more than enough.” Gently he lifted a hand to touch my forehead. “Are you sure you’re up to this? You look exhausted.”

“I feel fine, certainly well enough to be there… all thanks to you.”

Link turned away with a scoff. “I didn’t do anything.”

“You didn’t have to look after me the way you did.”

“I will always look after you,” he said, meeting my gaze. “One argument won’t change that.”

Something warm and familiar stirred in my chest, though it quickly withered into guilt.

“It was more than that. I broke my word.”

Link looked down at his hands, saying nothing.

“I never meant to hurt you,” I added softly. “But I couldn’t ignore them.”

“You didn’t trust that I would handle it.”

“I was closer to the village—”

“You had no idea where I was. And I had the Ocarina, remember? I could have reached them just as quickly as you did.”

“I didn’t know if you knew…”

Link gave me a dry look. “Zelda, of course I knew. You think they report to you before me?”

I knew I was losing the argument, but still I groped for excuses. “And when you discovered that you cannot wake them?”

Pain flickered across Link’s face, and immediately I regretted my words.

“You know that’s no excuse,” he said sharply. “I would have found another way… even if I brought them to you myself.”

I avoided his gaze, biting back another retort.

“Zelda, I know you’ve anguished over your reputation for months, looking for a chance to prove yourself—”

“This isn’t about proving myself, Link; it’s about my responsibility to our people! will not stand idly by anymore, not when I can save them.”

“And what of your responsibility to our child?”

I paused, breathing a frustrated sigh. “I had guards, Link.”

“Two guards. You rode through the night with two guards, no Ocarina, and no magic. You had no means of escape if something went wrong. That’s not responsible; it’s reckless.”

I cast him a challenging look. “I don’t think you have any right to lecture me on recklessness.”

“It’s my child too.”

“You know what I mean. Your life is already in danger; you shouldn’t be out here at all.”

He shook his head. “We’ve already discussed that. I don’t have a choice. You do.”

“But I don’t, Link!” I exclaimed, rising up off the bed. “You have your duties, and I have mine. I can’t just abandon them, and I was wrong to promise that I would.”

Link avoided my fierce gaze, staring at his hands while I willed myself to calm.

“Despite your implications,” I said in a gentler tone, “I do care about our child’s safety. Coming here was not an easy decision.”

At this he lifted his head and slowly rose to his feet, fixing me with his sad, probing gaze.

“I know you would be devastated if something went wrong,” he said quietly, “but I also know you’ve detached yourself from this child.”

I took a step back, affronted. “How can you even say that to me?”

“Because I know you,” he said gently, reaching for my cheek, “and I know you’re as frightened as you are frustrated—about me, the baby, everything. You’re done feeling powerless, and you’re done being cautious.”

I searched his face through glistening eyes, too stunned to find response—when a knock sounded at the door. Link sighed, letting his hand fall from my cheek.

“They’re ready,” he murmured, pulling away to grab our cloaks. “We shouldn’t keep them waiting.”

I nodded, and took my cloak, feeling strangely numb as I draped it across my shoulders. Together we left the room and headed outside, neither of us saying another word.

Streaks of red scorched the sky as long shadows stretched across the village, casting the mourners in dreary silhouette. They had gathered a ways out toward Hyrule Field, where the seven pyres stood.

Nadine led our humble procession, followed by Link and myself, our guards, and a representative for each mourning family.

Link and I stood off to the side, watching Nadine take her place before the crowd, backed by a row of seven burning torches.

“My friends,” she addressed the villagers, her strong voice carrying above the wind, “we have gathered in this solemn hour… to release our loved ones from the grip of unending darkness.”

My eyes strayed to the bodies resting upon the pyres, and I noticed that their faces were calm, even peaceful, as though the curse had already left them.

What a cruel deception it was.

"It is with great sorrow, and great love,” Nadine continued, "that we free them from this torment… so they may find eternal rest in the loving arms of the Divine Sisters.”

By that point several people had begun to weep, and Nadine noticeably strained to keep her composure.

“I now invite those who have volunteered to speak to please come forward.”

Fourteen eulogies followed, and each tearful anecdote whittled at my composure until tears streamed down my face. The people’s grief filled my ears, cutting like a blade into my heart, and I let it consume me. It no longer mattered how many lives I saved that day; I knew only the faces of those I had failed.

“Torch bearers,” Nadine called once the last speaker had finished, “please step forward to receive your flame.”

One by one each representative removed a torch from its holder until all seven had been claimed. Then they stood in a small cluster, watching as Nadine doused the pyres in sacred oils. All the while an elegy chanted in the background, though I could not recall when it had started…

“With this cleansing firelight,

Free them from eternal night…”

The hymn grew quieter as the torch bearers neared the pyres, but the lead singers stayed strong. In regretful silence I mouthed the words, unable to dislodge the lump in my throat.

Then suddenly a scream rose above the song, and even the lead singers faltered when a woman threw herself at one of the pyres, clutching the body of her husband.

“Get away!” she screamed at the torch bearer, her voice hoarse and shrill. “He’s still breathing! He’s still breathing!”

My attention shifted when a hand grasped my arm, gently pulling me back the few steps I had unknowingly taken. Confused I turned and met Link’s gaze, seeing my own grief reflected in his eyes.

But there was nothing I could do. I had already given my best.

Myra. Her name is Myra.

I could only watch as her family coaxed her away from the pyre. An eternity seemed to pass before she relented, sobbing into her hands while her mother drew her close.

The image blurred beyond my tears.

I’m so sorry… I could have spared you this…

Suppressed sobs burned my throat, escaping in small, sharp breaths. How vividly I knew her anguish, how fresh the memories became as I watched her suffer the fate I so narrowly escaped…

My thoughts quieted then, distracted by the touch of Link’s fingers brushing mine. I responded and slipped my hand into his, careful to keep my gaze focused on the ceremony.

By now Myra’s family had rejoined the crowd, their faces barely distinguishable as the sunset faded into darkness.

“With this cleansing firelight,

Free them from eternal night…”

Then the representatives raised their torches and set the pyres alight. The fire spread quickly, rising until seven massive flames pierced the air like blazing spires.

The sight ignited a wave of cries, disrupting our elegy, but those who could sing made a noble effort. Somehow I managed to join them for the last refrain, though my voice shook all the while. Beneath the folds of my cloak I tightened my hold on Link’s hand, feeling him do the same.

#zelda #loz #fanfiction #fanfic #fortitude #excerpts

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andrewmawby · 6 years

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Friday Favorites: Spring Decor, No-Sew Curtains, and a Kitchen That Isn’t White

Hello once again, Remodelaholics! I hope your list of spring projects is in full swing — once Mother Nature finally decides to stop the snow, we have a big list of projects, too! Even with the snow, we’ve been so enjoying doing a project with y’all LIVE over on Facebook each Wednesday. This week we painted a quick and easy stamped accent wall, so watch here on the blog soon for the full finished pictures and details! You can follow us here on Facebook to see not only all the ideas we share every day, but to see us live in action every week… except this next week, since we’ll be spring break-ing it

I hope you also have fun spring break plans and, if not, here’s some inspiration to get you started! This week we’re highlighting some non-traditional but beautiful home decor choices, from non-white kitchen cabinets to shelves that aren’t floating and a barn door that isn’t rustic!

Friday Favorites

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Favorite beautiful window treatment trick: I grew up sewing, so I’m pretty comfortable with the sewing machine… but even simple sewing jobs still require me to get it out from it’s hiding/storage place, so I love no-sew tricks! Lantern Lane Designs shows her quick tricks for no-sew curtains with an easy *faux* pinch pleat.

Favorite pop of color: Isn’t this little sign the cutest! You could make it, or you could buy it here. Because sometimes it’s worth the (minimal) cost to NOT have to do it yourself so you can do other things

Favorite dollar store hack: You know we love dollar store projects! See how Repurpose and Upcycle used a few super affordable supplies to make these petite hanging planters.

Favorite IKEA hack: We love the affordable HYLLIS wood and metal shelf hack that Suzy shared here, and three of our readers shared their versions of it this week over on Facebook. Michelle is using the industrial style shelf in her kitchen:

And two other readers, Stacy (first pic) and Shanna (second pic) took the hack one step farther to make a wide media shelf, perfect for decor and the TV! (Just be sure to anchor any shelf like this securely to the wall, for the safety of both your TV and your fellow house-dwellers.)

Favorite Amazon find: Did you fellow Fixer Upper fans know that JoJo wrote a recipe book? I stumbled across it over on Amazon and I bet it will be amazing! Get it here.

Favorite view from the sink: Yes, it’s nice to look out the window… but this gorgeous setup is a great view, too! And psst, did you notice the kitchen cabinets are NOT white? (Photo ©Remodelaholic | Home built and designed by Arive Homes)

For more non-white kitchens, check out these posts: Colorful Kitchen Cabinetry | Black Kitchen Cabinet Ideas

Favorite everything: There’s just so much to love about this space by Sims Hilditch, I couldn’t pick just one thing! The gorgeous mudroom cubbies, that tall vaulted ceiling, the brick floor — beautiful all-around. The rest of the house is stunning, too — check it out here.

Favorite reason to paint: This sample sale at Home Depot is a great deal, and it’s all online so you don’t even have to go to the store! A sample is a must if you’re wanting to repaint but aren’t sure about the color change, or one sample can of paint can paint an entire accent wall, like the herringbone accent wall we demonstrated on Facebook Live this week, or one of these handpainted walls, or many of these interior wall painting patterns.

Favorite wall treatment: Call it shiplap, plank wall, or paneling reborn — I love the texture a good wall treatment can add to a room, and this DIY wood plank wall adds so much to Joyfully Growing‘s space!

Favorite doesn’t have to be rustic: Barn doors are still so popular, but I love all the modern versions I’m seeing now! You don’t have to have a rustic style to make it work. We spotted this one in a recent home tour by Millhaven Homes, who also built this swoon-worthy elegant barn door we featured last year. (Photo ©Remodelaholic | Home built by Millhaven Homes, designed by Millhaven Interiors)

And for those of you wondering about the paint color, we don’t know with 100% certainty, but we put the image in one of our favorite paint color matching apps and Leisure Blue by Sherwin Williams looks like a very close match. It also could be a toned down version of Aegean Teal that we featured here. UPDATE: The designer who worked on this home chimed in over on Instagram and let us know that it is Storm Cloud by Sherwin-Williams. Thanks, Allison!

See more of our favorite barn doors and affordable hardware choices here.

Favorite reminder that it IS spring: Fresh flowers! Saw Nail and Paint has beautiful blooms all throughout her gorgeous spring home tour, but this living room shot just speaks to me. Simply beautiful, and those pink magnolias have my heart all a-flutter!

Favorite workspace: Not all workspaces are beautiful like this (I’m looking in the direction of my garage right now…) but Rain on a Tin Roof has totally transformed her office with so many fun touches — and would you believe that desk is a DIY?

Favorite shelf: I really like the look of ladder shelves like this but I’ve never found the right spot for one in my home. @spicysweetsaltyhome‘s looks great! (Want to see your best Instagram shot featured? Use #imaremodelaholic on your after pics for decor and projects.)

Favorite reason to go BOLD: A small furniture makeover is the perfect place to add a BIG pop of pattern or color. We’ve done it before on an IKEA dresser, and this Moroccan tile style side table looks wonderful over at The Style Safari.

Favorite DIY modification: Reader Steve sent in this table he built and modified from our cooler patio table plans. Way to make it your own, Steve!

From Steve: ” I found your patio table with cooler boxes plans on line and loved it. It was perfect for a project that I have been wanting to do for a long time. I did modify it a bit and changed the whole concept. To start, I put inset beverage holders in the table and boxed in the planter boxes filling the with spray foam to insulate. The pictures will show the rest. Big thank you to you guys for helping make my project a success.”

REMODELAHOLICS ANONYMOUS Link Party

Come share your latest and your greatest home and DIY projects — we love to see and feature YOU! There will be a new party with features and additional Friday Favorites every FRIDAY here on Remodelaholic — can’t wait to see what you’ve been up to! Share up to FIVE of your latest and/or greatest posts — just share different posts each week, please.

Just a few guidelines:

In order to be featured, please show some love by sharing, linking back, following, etc (you can grab a button if you’d like).

Please link the direct URL of the post: no homepage links, no business links.

Always keep your links family friendly. We reserve the right to remove any links for any reason.

Be a great party-goer and visit a few of the other links to share the love!

By submitting your link here, you grant Remodelaholic permission to use one photo to feature your post here on our site or on our social media channels, with credit and a link back.

The post Friday Favorites: Spring Decor, No-Sew Curtains, and a Kitchen That Isn’t White appeared first on Remodelaholic.

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whitegoldelephant-blog · 6 years

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easyweight101 · 7 years

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Lady Care Review (UPDATED 2017): Don’t Buy Before You Read This!

What is it?

Lady Care is a device that attaches to users’ underwear to provide relief from menopause symptoms. Lady Care works by targeting the automatic nervous system, or ANS, which aims to create a sense of balance for users.

Lady Care works by reducing excessive activity in the sympathetic nervous system and increasing activity in the parasympathetic nervous system. By restoring the equilibrium in the two parts of the ANS, users reportedly will experience a reduction in symptoms like sweating, hot flashes, anxiety and more.

In looking at the science behind multiple forms of menopause care, we’ve found that Femmetrinol most effectively helps users eliminate most symptoms and get back to their lives. Click the link to see how Femmetrinol works and how it can help you get through menopause.

Do you know the Best Menopause Supplements of 2017?

Lady Care Side Effects

Lady Care is a magnetic device, so users are at a reduced risk of developing the negative side effects they might experience with HRT or with certain supplements.

The makers of Lady Care claim this product works to alleviate the symptoms of menopause by rebalancing the body’s automatic nervous system, or ANS. The ANS has two parts, the sympathetic nervous system and the parasympathetic.

The sympathetic portion of the ANS is associated with the body’s fight or flight response and becomes overactive during menopause—causing the typical symptoms that come along with the transition — night sweats, hot flashes, anxiety, depression and more.

The parasympathetic portion helps the body digest food, calm the nerves and more. It slows down the body’s heart rate during times of stress.

Unfortunately, the official website fails to lay out how a magnet actually works to balance out the two parts of the ANS or how this is approach is better than taking a supplement.

Magnets are typically used for those suffering from pain — joint pain, back pain, arthritis, fibromyalgia, etc.

Magnet therapy in general does not have sufficient evidence for any of its purported uses and may not be safe for some users with insulin pumps, pacemakers or other internal devices.

That being said, there are few reported side effects associated with using magnets.

Nervous about the effects of HRT? Your guide to safer herbal solutions after the jump.

EDITOR’S TIP: Combine this supplement with a proven menopause pill such as Femmetrinol for better results.

Lady Care Quality

Lady Care doesn’t contain any ingredients, so the risk for an adverse reaction is relatively low, at least based on the information we came across during our research.

Unfortunately, there just isn’t enough evidence backing the use of this product. Several online searches regarding the use of magnets to treat menopause symptoms did not yield any results other than the FAQ section on the Lady Care website.

There were a few off-hand mentions of this product on some niche blogs that specialize in reviewing menopause, but nothing citing any scientific research, patient trials or anything else offering an extra layer of credibility.

Lady Care did have some, though not many, positive reviews, which is interesting. Magnet therapy, in general does not have much evidence that suggests its good for anything, let alone menopause — but perhaps there’s something there.

In any case, we think it’s wise to look elsewhere for another menopause product with more promising results.

See which menopause solution is right for you. Our guide to the best herbal ingredients when you click the link here.

The Price and Quality of Lady Care

Lady Care is available in both the US and the UK. The device sells for $59 on the official webpage and charges a flat rate of $6.95 for shipping and handling.

Users may be able to find this product elsewhere, too. It’s available on Amazon for $52.25, though it normally retails for $59 on this platform as well.

It’s hard to say whether this product is a good value. On the one hand, Lady Care costs about the same amount as a couple months’ worth of your average menopause supplement and hypothetically lasts for five years. On the other hand, it doesn’t have great reviews and bases its claims on science that remains largely unproven.

Take on all menopause symptoms once and for all. Click here to learn more about the various treatment options available today.

Business of Lady Care

Lady Care is made by a company known as Lady Care Menopause. Here’s how you can get in contact with someone:

Phone: 888.567.3443

Email: [email protected]

The official website for Lady Care looks old and features way too much text. We understand that this product needs a bit of an explanation, but the makers of this product don’t really do a great job in explaining what, exactly the Lady Care is.

As we’ve mentioned already, the Lady Care device is a magnet, designed to control the nervous system and reduce the symptoms associated with menopause.

Yet, the site doesn’t really explain that this device is a magnet and all the descriptions about how it works don’t feel especially straightforward. We felt confused during our review of this product and are certain at least some of the website visitors feel the same.

Additionally, we have an issue with the fact that Lady Care, the company, is responsible for nearly all of the published information available for consumers looking for evidence that a magnet can take the place of a supplement or doctor-prescribed hormone treatment.

There’s little evidence that proves the efficacy of magnet therapy and it’s hard for us to get behind a product that still needs a bit more research.

Customer Opinions of Lady Care

While the average star rating on Amazon is 3.4 out of five stars, many of the reviews we found expressed extreme disappointment with this product. Here are just a few of the comments past users of Lady Care left behind:

“I wore this dumb magnet 24/7 for over a month, and never saw any improvement. The product description is so confusing, and I don’t know why I thought a magnet would work for balancing hormones.”

“I had feeling this wouldn’t work, but was so desperate for relief that I was willing to try anything. The first day, I thought I was feeling better, but then the symptoms returned immediately.”

“Wearing this product leaves an indentation in your skin and presses uncomfortably into your stomach. I dealt with this for 4 months and did not see a single improvement in my menopause symptoms.”

“I was so excited about this, as I wanted to avoid taking HRT. After putting the device on, I felt dizzy and nauseous almost immediately, and when I removed it, the feeling subsided. Do not recommend.”

Lady Care did work for some reviewers, but the bulk of the reviews we came across suggested this product does not work for most people.

We understand that some users may be averse to taking supplements or hormone replacement therapies, but some users did report that the device made them feel dizzy or nauseous, so the possibility of an adverse reaction still exists.

Just from looking at the reviews alone, we feel that there are numerous solutions that better take on the symptoms of menopause and have more research, as well as positive reviews behind them demonstrating quality and consistency.

Click here to learn more about how to gain control of your body once again.

Conclusion – Does Lady Care Work?

Lady Care does not seem like a product that users can count on to deliver the kind of relief that they expect. The magnet technology does not have a whole lot of scientific data documenting its safety or efficacy, and even the product description doesn’t make all that much sense.

Lady Care is based off the principle that the pull of the magnet can help balance out the two portions of the ANS — which the makers of this product claim are the cause of menopausal symptoms like sweating, hot flashes and fatigue, as well as the effects this transition has on mental health.

It’s well-known that the real issue during menopause is the loss of estrogen and progesterone—which creates an imbalance in the body. Just about every menopause product addresses hormones in some way or another—whether that’s through an herbal supplement or a synthetic hormone replacement regimen.

We tried to find more info, outside of the Lady Care website, and there’s very little information about the use of magnets for menopause, besides a few blogs that have reviewed this product over the several years.

Based on the information we collected, we do not recommend this product. Neither science, nor a high consumer success rate are on this product’s side.

After comparing Femmetrinol to other menopause products on the market, we’ve found it really is the best option for women going through the change of life. This product is made from ingredients like chasteberry, wild yam and black cohosh — known for their ability to help regulate estrogen and progesterone levels and alleviate menopause symptoms.

Femmetrinol is made in an FDA-certified lab and contains a safe and potent blend of ingredients, tested for quality on a regular basis. Get a closer look inside Femmetrinol’s herbal formula. Click here to read more.

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andrewmawby · 6 years

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Friday Favorites: Spring Decor, No-Sew Curtains, and a Kitchen That Isn’t White

Friday Favorites

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Favorite dollar store hack: You know we love dollar store projects! See how Repurpose and Upcycle used a few super affordable supplies to make these petite hanging planters.

Favorite Amazon find: Did you fellow Fixer Upper fans know that JoJo wrote a recipe book? I stumbled across it over on Amazon and I bet it will be amazing! Get it here.

For more non-white kitchens, check out these posts: Colorful Kitchen Cabinetry | Black Kitchen Cabinet Ideas

See more of our favorite barn doors and affordable hardware choices here.

Favorite DIY modification: Reader Steve sent in this table he built and modified from our cooler patio table plans. Way to make it your own, Steve!

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