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laurelnose · 3 years

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Very New to your blog and the posts are probably way old but I saw you do Witcher Biology (??) rants sometimes and Id love to hear your take, if you have one, on what monsters (namely "naturally occurring" ones like draconids and insectoids) contribute to the ecosystem if anything and whether or not they should be hunted into extinction. I was discussing it w/ a friend last night after dealing with Iocaste, the last silver basilisk, and now its smthn I'm Invested in

re monster ecosystems: I just figure theyve probably found a niche in the world by now and can eat anything smaller incl. humans but because theyve got no natural predators aside from eachother and arent hunted by anything but witchers , monsters are just breeding and eating and wldnt that damage the land? or have they made their own like, circle of life or whatever ? Ive little knowledge on the subject as a whole but the whole thing intrigues me

hi & extremely belated welcome, anon! my apologies for the length of time you’ve been waiting for this answer; I had to think carefully about how I wanted to respond to this ask, because: there’s a lot going on here. also, because I am a disaster, I ended up posting it to ao3 first while I was avoiding tumblr for a spell and then completely forgot to come back. oops. i’m sorry!! This one’s about 5000 words long, which is a lot for tumblr, so reading on AO3 may be preferable.

The two main thrusts of your first ask (how do monsters interact with the ecosystem and should they be eradicated from the Continent) are questions of invasion ecology, the study of non-native/invasive species and their effects on the environment. Monsters, having arrived on the Continent about 1200 years ago during the Conjunction of Spheres from entirely alien dimensions, are indeed technically non-native species!

However, invasion ecology is…somewhat controversial, to say the least—there are a lot of invasive species, who have a lot of different & complex impacts, and a lot of different ideas about what we might do about any of this, and it’s basically all arguing all the time, so I wasn’t really sure how I wanted to approach the topic. Not to mention that for reasons I couldn’t initially put my finger on, it seemed wrong to apply theories of invasion ecology to the Witcher monsters. We’ll get into it! There are also a couple of common misconceptions/oversimplifications of how ecology works in your second ask which I want to unpack. Hopefully I pulled this together into something that makes sense, and feel free to ask me for clarification!

Some important background facts:

Species have always been moving to and “invading” new places on their own; humans and globalization have accelerated this process into a Big Problem, as the sheer number of invasive species being introduced all over the globe strains ecosystems already under pressure, but “native ranges” are always shifting, sometimes more dramatically than you might expect. If you go far enough back in time, all species are “non-native”.

Because of this, the very definition of “invasive species” is hotly contested. This is why you’ll hear dozens of terms like introduced species, injurious species, naturalized species, non-native species, etc.; these all have slightly different connotations, but all refer to a species that did not originate in a particular location.

An introduced species is usually classified as “invasive” as opposed to “non-native” or “naturalized” if its presence significantly alters the ecosystem it invades; some people define this more narrowly as a species that causes harm to an ecosystem. “Harm” can take a lot of different forms, as every non-native species interacts differently with the ecosystem they were introduced to.

Aside from various potential impacts to human economic activity, most forms of ecological harm by introduced species involve the decline of native species, by a variety of mechanisms; invaders might eat natives, outcompete them for food, interbreed with them, carry novel pathogens, etc. Invasive species are primarily a threat to biodiversity.

Now, here’s my Hot Take:

The Conjunction of Spheres is analogous to real-life ecological cataclysms such as the Cretaceous-Paleogene extinction event, and thus monsters are not invasive species.

The Cretaceous-Paleogene extinction event saw the extinction of 75% of all species on Earth after the Chicxulub asteroid hit, including the non-avian dinosaurs. The Earth has had several disasters like this, of varying severity—the Great Oxidation Event killed almost literally everything on Earth except for the cyanobacteria who caused it. These cataclysmic extinction events completely upended existing ecosystems, altering habitats beyond recognition and leaving swathes of niches emptied of life that the survivors could evolve to exploit.

The most recent Conjunction of Spheres on the Continent is supposed to have thrown everyone living on the planet at the time into chaos and darkness; it wouldn’t be unreasonable to assume that the interpenetration of multiple spheres caused mass extinction of species living in the pre-Conjunction environment, similar to Chicxulub or the GOE!

But Socks, you might say, evolution works on a massive timescale! It took millions of years to fill the niches left open by Chicxulub, but it’s only been 1200 years since the Conjunction of Spheres! And you are absolutely right*, but the Conjunction of Spheres canonically came pre-loaded with new species. We actually have no proof that any of the animals we see originated on the Continent: if humans are a post-Conjunction phenomenon, why not also dogs? Why not bears? Who’s to say any of those were actually there before-hand? (The elves, I guess, but as they have not, actually, said so, there’s no proof!!)

* FTR, 1200 years is a shockingly short period of time to go from cataclysm that plunged the world into darkness and chaos to functioning medieval-era society considering how long it actually took humanity to build 13 century Europe (horses had been domesticated for at least 3000 years by that time), even if we’re not assuming that most of the ecosystem was destroyed, so, my timeline concerns here are minimal, lmfao. TIMELINE WHAT TIMELINE.

…and actually now that I think about it the three options for the origin of dogs are a) elves or dwarves domesticated them, b) humans brought dogs with them during the Conjunction, or c) dogs have existed for less than 1200 years, and I refuse to accept that dogs are practically a new invention in the witcherverse, wtf.

Anyways: we really have no idea which species are truly “native” to the Continent, or what the physical environment was like prior to the Conjunction. While monsters are not native to the Continent, monsters are also not invasive—there cannot be decline of pre-Conjunction biodiversity or harm to the pre-Conjunction ecosystem because there is no pre-Conjunction ecosystem anymore.

should monsters be hunted to extinction?

So, the thing is, I think we should try to eradicate invasive species from non-native ranges if we can; the biggest problem with that is feasibility, not morality. It’s much more difficult than one might think to eradicate an invasive species once it’s established, and we have to be very careful that the methods we choose don’t have other impacts, but invasive species are a huge threat to the biodiversity of Earth! If monsters are invasive species, then the answer is yes, they should be eradicated from the places they are not native to.

(Notably, on Earth this kind of eradication is not the same thing as extinction; it would be a local extinction, or extirpation, where the species is totally wiped out in the places it invaded but still exists in its native range. This does get way more complicated if the invasive is already extinct in its native range.)

However, I have just outlined a possibility that would make it plausible for monsters not to be invasive species. Let me also outline why I prefer this interpretation. Here is a book conversation between the sorcerer Dorregaray of Vole and Geralt:

“Our world is in equilibrium. The annihilation, the killing, of any creatures that inhabit this world upsets that equilibrium. And a lack of equilibrium brings closer extinction; extinction and the end of the world as we know it. … Every species has its own natural enemies, every one is the natural enemy of other species. That also includes humans. The extermination of the natural enemies of humans, which you dedicate yourself to, and which one can begin to observe, threatens the degeneration of the race.”

“Do you know what, sorcerer?” Geralt said, annoyed. “One day, take yourself to a mother whose child has been devoured by a basilisk, and tell her she ought to be glad, because thanks to that the human race has escaped degeneration. See what she says to you.”

–The Bounds of Reason, ch. 6

This is a, uh, incredibly unsubtle reference to a debate that has been ongoing for decades; Geralt’s stance here is one of the key arguments in opposition to wolf and bear reintroduction. What do we do about large predators that may pose a threat to humans? How do we balance preservation of the ecosystem with the safety of people who have to coexist with these predators?

I can’t fully agree with Geralt, because large predators are integral to the ecosystem, which I value for its own sake and because humans depend on healthy ecosystems. But I can’t fully agree with Dorregaray either, because Geralt is right: human life is valuable and worthy of protecting. This is an issue that India has been running into in the past ten years; as their tiger conservation efforts yield fruit, people become more likely to encounter tigers, and thus more likely to have a bad encounter with a tiger. It’s become a political struggle as rural people who have to actually live with the possibility of a tiger attack come into conflict with urban conservationists who just really want to preserve tigers (& in some incidents, some of those conservationists have been Western, which is a whole additional level of fuckery). The fact is, there isn’t a good answer to this yet! We certainly should not drive tigers, wolves, or any other large predator to extinction, but we also have to figure out a way to keep people safe. It’s something humanity still has to wrestle with.

Under this framing, which CDPR reinforced when they chose to have the Count di Salvaress defend Iocaste as an endangered species while making significant provisions to minimize the damage she could do to human life, there’s far too much baggage attached for me to say yes, monsters should be hunted into extinction. If you’re going to make monsters analogous to wolves, of course I do not think we should get rid of monsters entirely!

And frankly, Geralt doesn’t think so either, despite his hardline stance about monsters that eat humans. Sapkowski isn’t exactly an anti-conservationist; though Dorregaray is shown as out of touch in this passage, at another point the narrative sides with him calling Philippa out on exterminating a species of ermine for her fur collar, and it’s consistently put forth that Geralt’s best quality is that he doesn’t want to perform violence for the sake of it or destroy things without cause, and one of the representations of that is that he refuses to kill endangered species even at cost to himself:

“What should I say about you, who rejects a lucrative proposition every other day? You won’t kill hirikkas, because they’re an endangered species, or mecopterans, because they’re harmless, or night spirits, because they’re sweet, or dragons, because your code forbids it.”

–Eternal Flame, ch. 2

If monsters and other post-Conjunction creatures are invasive species, the nuance in this conversation is flattened, and Geralt’s refusal to kill mecopterans and hirikkas becomes a flaw rather than a virtue. Boring! I also think that one of the strongest themes in the witcherverse is the idea of all monsters being human ills; wraiths are manifestations of hatred, necrophages multiply because of human bloodshed, cursed ones are created out of malice, mages like Alzur and Idarran of Ulivo go out of their way to straight-up create monsters from scratch*, etc. Iocaste attacks humans and takes livestock because the traditional prey of the silver basilisk, roe deer, has been extirpated by human destruction of their habitat. The aeschna in Blood of Elves attacks humans because humans have altered and polluted the flow of the Pontar, hunting the aeschna’s previous food (seals) to extinction. The true monster is the actions of humans. Monsters that appeared unbidden from another dimension into a previously functional ecosystem to invade and cause problems undermines this theme; monsters that are integrated into the ecosystem and subject to the same social and ecological forces as other animals supports it.

* Idarran’s “idr” monsters from Season of Storms absolutely should be eradicated. Did the world not have enough man-eating arthropods, Idarran? Did you really have to mutate horrible new ones and release them in populated areas?? Mages are a scourge, lmfao

Additionally, one of the biggest reasons I felt like I couldn’t actually apply invasion ecology to monsters was that, whether you accept my Conjunction theory as sufficient biological justification for this or not, monsters just don’t really behave like invasive species. It’s hard to explain this because the setting is pretty brief about its ecological details, but aside from the fact that the narrative frames them like just part of the ecosystem of the world, there are never any details like “that type of flower doesn’t exist anymore because giant centipede tunneling destroyed the soil they needed to grow in.” When monsters are the aggressors, their victims are always humans, not the environment or other animals, and again monsters are themselves often treated as victims of human actions.

So I say monsters aren’t invasive species!

Which means that monsters are, regardless of their strange origins, now a part of the Continent’s ecosystem just as much as bears and wolves.

So let’s talk monster ecology.

what do monsters contribute to the ecosystem, if anything?

So, the phrase “contributing to the ecosystem” is actually super loaded, and I want to unpack that before we go anywhere else. Ecosystems are made up of organisms, and organisms interact with and impact ecosystems, but they don’t necessarily contribute to ecosystems! The implication of “contribute” is that it is possible for an organism to not contribute, and it follows from there that some organisms are not useful. This is functionally nonsensical, and also dangerous.

Conservationists talk a lot about “intrinsic value,” which in this context is the idea that we should want to keep species around just because their existence is valuable! Biodiversity is intrinsically valuable. This is important, firstly because I do believe that all species are intrinsically valuable, but also: ecosystems are so enormously complicated that we do not know the full extent of any species or individual organism’s impact, and we can’t predict what the consequences of removing any given species might be. Treating all species as intrinsically valuable is hedging our bets. All organisms affect the ecosystem, because it’s impossible for them not to, and while some species definitely have outsize impact, none of them are “not contributing,” and frankly even if some of them weren’t, it would be the absolute height of human arrogance for us to decide we could tell which ones were useless when we barely even know what most species eat. Mosquitoes are the base of the entire goddamn food chain, and you still get assholes claiming they don’t “contribute anything.” Of course, most people don’t really mean all of these implications when they use the phrase, but I don’t find it useful to talk about what species “contribute,” and avoid using that language if I can!

What I assume you mean by “what do monsters contribute” is a combination of “what roles might monsters play in the ecosystem” and “are monsters actively harmful to the ecosystem, i.e. do they cause loss of biodiversity?”

And this is difficult to answer! As I’ve said, I don’t think monsters are invasive species, and thus don’t harm the ecosystem, though we know that monsters can be harmful to humans. However, when it comes to the role they do play in the ecosystem, there isn’t enough in canon for me to do more than wildly speculate! Also, there are so so many of them, and the role of a hirikka is going to be wildly different from that of a draconid.

Just offhandedly, most of the big predatory monsters can be assumed to fill the same roles as Earth’s big predators, one of the big ones being overpopulation of prey species, which has ramifications throughout the ecosystem. Some of them are canonically ecosystem engineers, or animals that physically alter their environment (think beavers); for instance, shaelmaar and nekker tunneling. Additionally, the big insectoid colonies can’t be relying solely on naturally-occurring caves for their homes; they’ve gotta be constructing some stuff themselves. These tunnels can be repurposed as habitat for other organisms, from giant centipedes to sewant mushrooms. Necrophages, like corpse-eaters in our world, likely limit the spread of diseases from decomposing flesh (and really wouldn’t be as much of an issue if everyone would stop, you know, doing war and mass murder, lmfao). Arachasae use tree trunks and organic plant material to conceal themselves, which is likely contributing to plant reproduction in a few different ways—but the arachasae decorating essay is a different topic that I swear I will finish one day oh my god—

…anyways, feel free to ask about any specific monsters or niches if you’re curious, but if I tried to go into detail with every single potential niche/ecosystem service all of the monsters we know of might fill, we would be here all day!

Let’s talk about a couple specific things you brought up in your second ask.

> theyve probably found a niche in the world by now and can eat anything smaller incl. humans

I mean…maybe! That is, yeah, they’ve definitely settled into niches by now, but feeding is way more complicated and interesting than that.

For instance: orcas can eat basically whatever the fuck they want—orcas are fully capable of bringing down everything from fish to seals to gray whales to great white sharks. But they don’t. In the Pacific Northwest, the resident orca pods almost exclusively eat salmon, while the transient pods largely feed on seals. Orcas are kind of an extreme example, but this is something called resource partitioning and it’s a big part of how animals limit competition with one another and what enables lots of predators to coexist in one place!

We see a big fuck-off dragon thing and we assume that it’ll eat anything it can fit in its mouth, and definitely some predators work like that. But just because an animal is technically capable of eating something and deriving nutrition from it doesn’t mean that it will. Silver basilisks made roe deer the staple of their diet before the destruction of beech forests meant they had to turn to humans—which is a pretty specific dietary restriction when there should be multiple species of deer running around, not to mention everything else a draconid could be killing! And given how many types of draconid there are…I have to assume there’s some kind of resource partitioning going on to prevent them all from conflicting with each other! For instance, if basilisks prefer roe deer, maybe forktails prefer wild goats, while wyverns are mostly kleptoparasitic (stealing other predators’ kills).

And of course, not all monsters eat humans at all; harpies steal from and attack humans, so they’re a dangerous nuisance, but they don’t seem to eat them. And in the books Geralt mentions plenty of monsters which are totally harmless.

So yes, there are lots of things monsters could be eating, but it would strongly depend, and there’s a lot of interesting places one can take monster diets! Netflix decided their strigas only eat specific organs, leaving the rest of the body untouche, & I love that for her. More monsters that need a particular kind of nutrition that leads them to take only specific body parts from some kills!

> because theyve got no natural predators aside from each other and arent hunted by anything but witchers, monsters are just breeding and eating and wldnt that damage the land? or have they made their own like, circle of life or whatever ?

Absolutely—invasive species whose populations rapidly increase once they’re away from their natural predators cause the decline of native species, often by eating natives directly or competing with natives for resources. And in fact, even native species who become overpopulated can seriously damage the ecosystem (see: white-tailed deer in the United States, whose overpopulation has such negative ecological effects that some people argue we should classify them as invasive, even though they have definitely been here this whole time).

However, even if we grant that monsters are invasive, it’s a little more complicated than that for a few reasons!

Despite the apparent preponderance of them in the witcher games, most monsters are supposed to be strongly on the decline, like witchers themselves. Geralt’s profession is falling out of necessity; human development of the Continent is going to be the biggest suppressing factor in monster populations in the future. Monster overpopulation is just canonically not a problem in this universe! But even in the scenario where the Inevitable March Of Civilization isn’t threatening monster populations, there are a lot of factors that could and would limit monster populations.

(TL;DR for this next part: yeah I definitely think they’ve figured out their own little circle of life—the term you’re looking for is ecosystem equilibrium, btw!—& I’m going to take the next 1.2k to talk about how.)

For starters, predation is only one among many limiting factors that affect populations & prevent them from ballooning out of control:

food availability: If there’s not enough food, there’s not enough food! It also matters how adaptable the animal’s diet is—silver basilisks moved from deer to humans, but if the eucalyptus went extinct koalas would not switch to eating cycads.

illness and parasites: Some people argue these are more important than direct predation for limiting populations, and I am often inclined to agree. Basically, if a population becomes very dense, illness and parasites spread more quickly, creating a natural limiter on how many animals can live in any one place. The greater susceptibility of some individuals to illness or parasites also winnows down populations. Non-native species often escape a good portion of their native diseases by moving to a new range—however, given how fast bacteria and viruses evolve, 1,200 years is a pretty decent amount of time for new diseases to arise. Also, just going to drop a link to my treatise on monster parasites here. It’s gross, mind the warning at the start of the post.

mate availability: If only a certain percentage of the population is actually able to reproduce, that’ll eventually bring the total number down. RIP Iocaste’s boyfriend 😔

territory/shelter availability: Animals need a certain amount of space and certain types of spaces to survive, and space isn’t infinite! It again depends on how adaptable an animal is; rats find ways to thrive nearly everywhere, but pandas can only live where there’s bamboo. If there’s not enough space to hide from predators, reproduce safely, store food, and avoid adverse weather, the population again limits itself naturally.

natural disasters: Wildfires, drought, flooding, tsunamis, storms, etc. pick off significant portions of wildlife populations. Disasters are sporadic rather than directly linked to population like most of the other factors but these periodic blows to population and the other impacts of fire or flooding are often integral to the ecosystem (see especially: fire regimes and fire ecology.)

Now let’s talk predation & monsters! (Genuinely, I think predation is one of the most interesting things in ecology; people tend to simplify it down to things eat other things, which—yeah, but there’s so much more going on there!)

First, I wouldn’t underestimate the effects of monsters eating other monsters! Even if it’s rare for a draconid to snatch up a nekker and carry it off, the threat of a draconid doing so can have dramatic impacts; researchers found that just playing the sound of dog barks on a beach stopped raccoons from foraging for crabs for over a month after the barking stopped, leading to an increase in crab populations, even though no raccoons ever encountered a dog. This is called the ecosystem of fear (which as a term is metal as hell) and it theorizes that just the fear of predators can lead to chronic stress for prey animals, decreasing reproduction and making them more susceptible to disease. Maybe draconids in Toussaint eat only a few dozen nekkers a year, but that might cause thousands of nekkers to have fewer offspring or fall to disease. When it comes to ecosystems the direct effect is usually only a small part of the story!

Second, when we talk about a species not having natural predators, we’re usually talking about an animal that would have a predator back in its home range—lionfish, for instance, have plenty of predators in their natural range (the Indo-Pacific), but no natural predators in their invasive range (the Caribbean), so invasive lionfish, suddenly freed of a limiting factor, can run amok. However, a great white shark has, aside from orcas (who do not actually eat white sharks, they’re just assholes sometimes) and occasionally other white sharks, more or less no natural predators anywhere once it reaches maturity, and that’s fine! Lack of predation of great white sharks did not cause their populations to explode and consume the ocean. White sharks are limited by other factors.

So: it is possible that wherever draconids originated (and it’s entirely possible that “draconids” came from multiple different places, tbh) there was something bigger that preyed on them, but it’s not unreasonable to assume they were also apex predators in their previous dimension (I mean…look at them), and that adult draconids were never really preyed on by anything else! It isn’t necessarily an issue for there not to be predators of certain monsters on the Continent.

(Though, of course, we also shouldn’t forget that most apex predators are prey when they’re young—baby white sharks are snack-sized for a lot of fishes, and bear cubs and wolf pups are similarly vulnerable. Based on the size of the eggs you see in TW3 draconid nests, a basilisk is hatched around the size of a little dog, which is the perfect size for small, ballsy predators such as wolverines to sneak into a nest and snap them up—predators such as more wolverines or raptors like eagles and hawks might also come directly for the eggs.)

When it comes to smaller monsters such as nekkers, who likely weren’t apex predators in their original dimensions and would thus be subject to that lack of natural predators—there are usually specific reasons why prey species manage to avoid predation in their introduced range. Lionfish confound Caribbean predators because lionfish are covered with huge poisonous spines that Caribbean predators don’t know how to deal with.

Drowners, on the other hand, are basically just man-shaped fish; they don’t have any adaptations or defenses that would really stump a bear or a wolf. Again, bigger monsters are still probably checking the populations of smaller monsters no matter what, but there’s really no reason a bear couldn’t figure out how to eat a drowner! Unless a monster has a unique defense (e.g. scurver spines), is actively distasteful to eat (rotfiends, probably), or is just difficult to take down (nekkers in packs), most of the non-monster predators* on the Continent will have incorporated various monsters into their diet by now, or suppressed monster populations indirectly with the threat of predation or by competing with them for food. It has been over a thousand years, which is nothing evolutionarily but is still a decent period of time for mammals, who pass hunting techniques down to their babies, to figure out how to eat ghouls—especially if we’re considering that the Continent’s mammals may also be a result of the Conjunction and would thus have to have been just as adaptable as the monsters to establish themselves. And I’ve also actually talked before about how wolves specifically might be preying on necrophages!

* For reference, the non-monster predators are, considering the Continent is more or less Europe, most likely lynxes, brown bears/polar bears (in Skellige), wolverines, foxes, badgers, and a variety of large birds of prey.

So—yes, if monsters were truly overpopulating, then that would damage the ecosystem. However, canon tells us they are definitely not doing that, and there are also many factors that would prevent that from happening!

(Though I will say that some of the reasons white-tailed deer are overpopulated are that we got rid of cougars and wolves and human development creates a lot of extra habitat of the type that deer like. Given that we know many of draconids are for sure in significant danger of going extinct, and the trajectory that Europe’s wolf and bear populations followed in real life, it is possible that the Continent will have to contend with an overpopulation of some of the smaller monsters at some point as they continue to try to eradicate the larger predators, both monster and non-monsters—you think the drowner problem is bad now, wait until the bears are gone and city development has tripled the number of sewers. Yet another of those humans-make-monster-problems-worse things I am fond of in the Witcherverse!)

…whew. that was a lot of words. In conclusion: ecology is really cool & there’s a bunch of ways monsters can fit into it!!

#kaer morhen biology of monsters 101 #and a bit of #witcher book blogging #asks #anonymous

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gingerteaonthetardis · 3 years

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Ive recently started following so not sure if you've done this before or not. But you last prompt has me wanting rose meeting clasic who doctors when she knows fully well who she keeps running into but the doctor has no clue who she is. Tho to maintain timelines she tries her best to keep her name and all info she knows on the down low

nonny!! i am so sorry this took so long. goodness knows you may never see this, because it’s been (let me check my watch) approximately five million years. but i did get something finished, in the end, and i hope you see it! (and enjoy it? maybe?)

as usual, please forgive any mistakes. i am a very bad editor.

read on ao3.

𝕄𝕚𝕝𝕖𝕤 𝕥𝕠 𝔾𝕠

The worst part—aside from the secrecy, and the endless brushes with danger, and the burden of the gun at her back, and the fear that she will someday jump too far—is that sometimes…

He's just a complete arsehole.

"No, I insist that you tell me," the Doctor says rather pompously. "I've let this go on long enough and I won't allow it to go any further, you shiftless vagabond. You must tell me who you are if you intend to seek refuge on my ship."

With her back to the door, she can feel the vibration of pulse weapons firing on the wooden shell of the TARDIS. It rattles her ribcage, making her heart beat faster. "I told you! I'm a time traveler," she cries, "just like you!"

Even after all these months, that's all the backstory she's managed to work out, short of lying entirely—something she's not at all comfortable with. (Not with him, at least.)

But the Doctor is unimpressed by her story. With a tight frown, he strides around the console, his coattails fanning out behind him in a technicolor blur, headed for a button that will—she guesses—unlock the ship's doors and send her tumbling out into space.

"If you do that," she shouts, "we'll both die! And you may not understand it now, but we'll take two universes down with us!" That catches his attention, and if she weren't so afraid—and angry, damn him—she'd laugh. "Possibly more," she adds, because it's the truth.

It's not an unintentional slip so much as a judicious offering: Understand the stakes, Doctor. Understand why I'm here without me saying.

He cocks his curly head, brows heavily furrowed in a familiar way. Considering. Calculating. She decides immediately that this incarnation is dangerous in a way that the others haven't been. Not strictly unkind—but unyielding. Stubborn.

"You're just trying to save your own life."

At that, Rose does laugh, a sound both brutal and brittle. "Oh, yes. That's why I launch myself through time and space, over and over—without a ship—without coordinates—with only myself and my gun." The Doctor sneers at the reminder of the weapon strapped to her back, like a cat threatened with a pail of water. "Because I value my own life so highly."

Glaring, the Doctor fires back. "If you didn't value it, you wouldn't bring the gun."

She remembers, suddenly, that she hasn't saved him with it yet. That's not happened for him. And she feels herself tremblingly split—between the threat of laughter and the threat of tears. She can't explain that she's saved him from annihilation with this very weapon.

That she carries it with her everywhere—sleeps with it by her bedside—because of him.

The first time she meets him out of sequence, the world is burning. Or, at least, it feels that way. The surface of the planet she's landed on is pock-marked by bullets, riddled with brutal craters. She has to pick her way through the rubble to even see him—and at first, she can't tell. If it’s him, or if it’s anyone else who has been through too much, who has lost people, and who carries the same haunted look in his eyes that the Doctor always did.

But, of course, it’s him.

There is a crackle of static coming from some sort of handheld transceiver—it sounds like a distress call—and she can make out one word. Just one. “Doctor!”

“You gonna get that?” she asks, not giving herself time to think better of it. His eyes have been so pinned to the burning horizon that it’s clear he hasn’t noticed her, and when he does, he shows no startlement. His eyes slide her way—a pale, piercing blue. They remind her of someone. (They remind her of him.)

“No,” he says flatly.

“Why not?” She steps closer, makes to sit beside him. They’re at the very edge of a sheer rock face, looking down over a valley that eventually turns into a golden, shining city under the fierce red sky. It’s beautiful, in a grim, despairing sort of way. Expansive. She imagines it might be his home world.

“Because it’ll be the end of me.”

Rose’s flinch is instinctual. Somehow, she hopes this isn’t true, but she can’t be sure. It’s not as if she can ask him which body he’s on. Surely, she thinks desperately, he’d know me if this was after. If this was the end.

And if his world is still in existence...

This must be before.

Which is a unique sort of torture; she can’t tell him anything that will damage the future. She’s not even sure she can provide him the comfort he so clearly needs.

Her eyes slide over him—over the unkempt, harshly-shorn curls and the battered jacket. He looks as if he’s come a very long way. The only thing she can think to say is a useless platitude, but she says it anyway. “You know, every end is just a new beginning. For Time Lords, at least,” she adds, smiling faintly.

The Doctor finally looks at her, eyes sharp and inquisitive. She can see that he’s trying to work her out—to decide who or what she is. She can’t let him.

Rose reaches over and takes his hand in hers. “I know you hate endings. This will be the worst one, I think,” she admits. “But it’ll get better, after. You won’t be alone.” It’s a promise, she thinks. A vow. She’s always making those, when it comes to him. Commitments.

He opens his mouth like he’s going to say something—

But he doesn’t get the chance.

There is a sound like something unzipping, only sharp and popping in her ears like a gunshot. Rose is on her feet in an instant; her Torchwood training kicks in automatically, so quickly that she’d be horrified if she wasn’t entirely focused on the source of the noise: a Dalek.

The metal exterior—the round, golden globes and the rigid panels—reflect the violent light. At the end of the eyestalk, there is a familiar blue glow, changing in time with the Dalek’s enunciations: “EX-TER-MI-NA—”

Rose fires faster than she’s ever done before, in all of her training sessions at the rifle range. Faster than she’s ever done anything, probably in the whole of her life. Sliding the gun off her back—bracing it against her midsection—pulling the trigger. It’s the work of a moment. And she doesn’t miss. The top blows off the giant pepper pot, leaving behind a steaming heap of molten metal and colorful sparks.

When she turns to the Doctor, she sees that he is unarmed—hands up, as always, in a signal of surrender. He doesn’t seem surprised to see it, exactly. Though his expression is one of resignation, his eyes go wide when he sees what she’s done. They turn on her, sparkling blue and bright.

Another day, she might preen under his attention, but she already knows there’s no time. “This isn’t the end,” she says, unshakeable in her belief.

Rose wonders if she should give him her gun; it’s clear that he needs it more than she does.

She’s actually on the point of sliding the strap over her shoulder when she feels the tug behind her navel. It’s a familiar, sickening sensation, and she doesn’t have time to brace for it—to say goodbye, to wish him luck, to tell him everything she wants to say.

She is already gone.

After that, it gets easier to work out which of him is from before her and which of him seem to be coming after. The oldest of him—the man with slicked white hair and a firm frown set upon his face—appears to her a number of times, always on the periphery. She doesn’t speak to him much: only ever a few words in passing. There’s a man who seems nearly as old, only his hair is curled and his accent is rolling, and he always seems to be in a hurry.

But there are versions of him with light in his eyes, and those are the ones she tries to hang on to. The ones that came before the sad man, sitting at the edge of the world.

The man with question marks all over his lapels bumps into her outside a bar and tells her a joke, and she wants so badly to tell him everything. Instead, they save a city together without so much as drawing a weapon. When his companion—a wicked, clever teenager with a patch-covered jacket—asks her to come along, “just for a trip or two,” it takes everything Rose has to refuse.

“You can show me how to use that gun,” the girl says, rather impishly.

“Sorry, I can’t,” she says, and she really means it. “I’ve got a schedule to keep.”

And miles to go before she sleeps.

“God, you really are an arsehole!” she shouts. He’s standing with his arms crossed, leaning against the console like he’s got all the time in the world—only she knows he hasn’t got all the time in the world, and that the planet they’re on will be vaporized if they don’t get moving. “So stubborn. Even after all these years, you refuse to listen to me, even when I know something you don’t.”

“If you know something,” he drawls, “perhaps you could just tell me.” There’s a petulant pout about his chin and the edges of his mouth, as if he hadn’t expected her to hold up this long under his scrutiny. She takes a bit of pleasure in that, at least.

“I’m not exactly willing to risk the multiverse to satisfy your curiosity, Doctor.”

“Ah. Pity.”

She’s beginning to think that he likes making her mental.

The smug look on his face takes her back—a matter of months, or years at this point, she can’t tell either way—to a different Doctor. A different face making that same expression.

If she closes her eyes, she can see the self-satisfied half-smile blooming into a wider, more manic grin. Every time her voice had ticked higher, grown louder—every time her expletives got more direct—he would smile harder until she wanted to take that ridiculous scarf around his neck and strangle him with it.

He’d been one of her favourites, in the end.

Like he’d known she needed a good shout, and was more than willing to stand there pleasantly and absorb it. On occasions like that, she could almost forget that she was a stranger to him; it felt like it used to.

Those moments were why, after all this time, she still loved him. The daft alien.

The reminder of which makes her pause, softened a little by the memories of all the times he’s infuriated her and she’s gone on loving him. The Doctor is stubborn, and though he doesn’t remember her in this incarnation—even if she’s certain he’s not the earliest she’s met—she knows she won’t win this argument unless she tries another tactic.

“I’ll tell you something,” she says, urgency making her voice pitchy and tense. “I’ll tell you why I carry this gun if you just—get us out of here.”

Once again, the Doctor’s expression is thoughtful. Calculating. His hand rises to cradle his chin, and she thinks briefly about punching him in the jaw. It might convince him, but there’s an equal chance that she’ll just bruise her knuckles. She’s never punched a Time Lord before and probably shouldn’t start now.

(In four weeks, when she comes through the void and meets a man called Narvin, she will finally punch a Time Lord. One of her knuckles will swell to nearly the size of a £1 coin and turn a faint violet. He will have her thrown in prison, which the Doctor will help her escape.)

Rose is holding her breath. She wonders if he’s really going to let them both die here, atomized and with so much life unlived. It would be just like him; she’s met some versions that were dangerous, devastated enough to do incalculable damage. She’s only managed to stop him in the past by the skin of her teeth, and with the help of other—she thinks, better—companions.

Come on, you arsehole.

Take the bait.

He turns his back to her and hits a series of buttons—she can’t tell which, because every console seems different and she can never get the hang of them without the TARDIS’s help. But she feels distinctly that they are moving. The familiar noises of the ship in flight make her feel, abruptly, excited. It’s been so long since she’s had more than a moment in the ship, more than sneaking through or creeping past on her way to somewhere else.

Rose feels the breath leave her lungs, and she smiles. “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me,” the Doctor snarks. “Tell me why you’ve brought this ridiculous weapon onto my ship.”

“I’m thanking you for the sake of the planet,” she shoots back. “It would’ve been blown to bits if we’d stayed any longer. Thank you,” she reiterates, “for showing a bit of decency.” Rose suppresses a smile when his brow furrows and his glare turns on her. “I carry this gun with me, because someday—I’m not sure when it’ll happen for you—I’ll need it.”

“Oh, that’s no—”

She rolls her eyes. “To save your life. From a Dalek.”

The Doctor pales. “That isn’t—”

“And if I don’t save your life then—and probably a few other times…” Rose pauses, chewing her bottom lip. “I’ll never get to tell you.”

“Tell me what?” She can’t tell if he’s more interested or exasperated, or perhaps suspicious. His eyes track her as she walks across the console room. She thinks they’re blue, but can’t make them out from this far away. Still, she steps closer.

“That I—”

The tug. The wrench. The sick feeling in her stomach. She wonders if this is some sort of sick, inverted payback for what he hadn’t said on the beach.

And she’s gone again.

She lands in the middle of a military base. In a corn field. She lands in Aberdeen, of all places. She lands on distant planets, on parallel earths. She lands a few feet away from the TARDIS, only to find it locked. She lands outside a brick building that seems to be burning down. She lands in the middle of a coliseum. She lands in a graveyard where the earth is being overturned, punched through by metal fists. She lands on a university campus. She lands in a swamp.

Through the years, she gets cleverer. Better at hiding her identity, disguising herself. She tells him to throw that wilted celery out before he attracts grubs. She wonders if she should kiss the man with the bowtie. She is running, always running.

The gun is heavy at her back, and the Doctor always seems to look at it like she’s carrying a festering wound. But she refuses to put it down, because she remembers the man who needed her help.

To be saved from a Dalek, so he could save so many others.

When she lands and the world is ending, there he is. Brown hair, brown suit. He takes off running, but she feels something heavy in her feet. A sense of foreboding, almost.

To save your life, she’d said.

From a Dalek, she’d said.

She almost doesn’t see it coming.

“EX-TER—”

Rose stops in the street.

She turns, and she shoots.

She hasn’t fired her gun in such a long time that she almost misses—but she doesn’t. The Dalek that would’ve killed the Doctor—perhaps for good—is a smoldering lump of metal and wiring and bitter, withered organic material. Like an eager child, he skids to a halt, his plimsolls slippery in the damp evening, barely inches from her drawn weapon. “You saved my life,” he says. Marveling. Perhaps, she thinks, realizing. “From a Dalek.”

She drops the gun, and it clatters heavily to the ground. Her arms feel light without the weight of it. Rose drags him close, pulling him against her. She feels instinctively that her job is done—that now they can find a way through everything else, together.

“Yes,” she exhales. “I did. I love you, you arsehole.”

#the last prompt of the year!!#featuring some six and some eight and a tiny dash of four and ten!#rose tyler #dimension hopping rose #thanks for the prompt!#abbey.txt #dw #ficandchips #doctorrose

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emybain · 4 years

Text

Settling In

this is the first time ive ever written a sequel to an ask fic so i hope yall are happy. this is a sequel to I’m Nova. Nova Artino if you havent read that.

ao3

Simon watched the children play in the backyard from the kitchen window. At the stove, Hugh was making dinner. The kids were taking turns pushing one another on the swing set, Adrian letting Nova have longer turns before she insisted on switching. The sentiment brought a smile to Simon’s face.

It had been a couple weeks since Simon found the girl, only eight years old, in the hands of the Anarchists. After spending a few days in the hospital wing at headquarters, Simon and his husband decided it was best to take her home with them. That way, she would be safe from the hungry eyes of the media. It was frustrating getting her to bed every night, as she refused to set a foot in the guest room until she was alone, but Hugh and Simon were afraid of her running away and wanted to keep an eye on her. At least Adrian loved the idea, having already grown fond of the girl in the short time they had known one another. Their friendship was ironic, in a sad way, but Simon didn’t like to think about it. Georgia had died two years ago, yet her death was still a knife to the side.

“What are we going to do about her?” Simon turned from the window to Hugh, who was pushing around sausage in a pan.

“Hm?” Hugh shifted his body so he faced Simon a bit more.

“What are we going to do about Nova?” He pushed his glasses up and crossed his arms.

The look Simon got was almost comical. “Aren’t we going to keep her? She has nowhere else to go.”

Simon released a soft sigh. “You know we can’t do that, Hugh. Taking on Adrian was one thing. We’re his godparents and we’re financially stable to handle one prodigy child. But two?” He shook his head.

Hugh turned the stove off. “She’s a prodigy? How did you find that out?”

There was a screech from outside, and they both peered out to see Nova stand up from the bottom of the slide, covered in mud and a grin on her face. Adrian stood at the top, laughing.

“Why else would the Anarchists be hiding her?” Simon lowered his voice, although they were the only two in the house. “Ace killed her family because David came to us. Why didn’t he kill her, too?”

Hugh removed his apron and began getting out bowls and silverware. “You’re right. I hadn’t thought about that. But, Love,” he paused, closing the cabinets, “where is she going to go? I mean, don’t you feel as responsible for her as with Adrian?”

A pang hit Simon’s chest. Hugh had a point; they had failed to protect the Artinos the same night Georgia died. It was only right for them to make sure she stayed safe. They owed that much to David and his wife.

“I know.” Simon looked down at the checkered tile. “But will she trust us? Wouldn’t she be better off with a non-Renegade family? You’ve seen the looks she gives us. How she refuses to sleep at night if we’re in the room with her. There’s no telling what kind of bullshit the Anarchists have been feeding her. What’s to say she won’t run away or try to murder us in our sleep in the future?”

Hugh narrowed his eyes at him. “Your paranoia is showing again.” He walked forward and kissed Simon lightly. Simon closed his eyes, welcoming his husband’s hold. “We’ll figure it out,” Hugh said once he pulled away. “In the meantime,” he turned toward the cracked open window, “Kids, dinner!”

“I was afraid you were going to say that,” Simon murmured under his breath as the children entered the kitchen, sweaty and caked in mud from head to toe.

___________

Nova waited for Adrian in his bedroom, spending her time looking at his collection of comic books on his bookshelves. She missed her home a lot, but at least Adrian was nice. He understood what it was like to be uprooted, at least that’s what Nova could figure out based on their conversations. Still, what would Uncle Ace think about her being with the enemy? They let her family die instead of coming to save them. Surely, Ace was coming up with a rescue plan. At eight years old, there wasn’t much she could do to fight back anyway . Leroy refused for Ingrid to start training her until she was at least ten, so she had useless skills. There was her power, but she was still working on making it stronger. And down in the subway tunnels, it wasn’t like she could practice on the other Anarchists. Before she was kidnapped, Nova had plans to be just like her uncle, to be a powerful prodigy that defends all prodigies from discrimination and annihilates any offenders of equality.

Her hands fell upon a comic different from the others. This one was just on plain printer paper and appeared to be homemade. She flipped through it, admiring the designs. They were a bit amateur, but good nonetheless. It was incomplete, clear from the half drawn characters on one of the pages.

The door creaked and she whipped around, only to be met with a slightly startled Adrian. He had fresh pajamas on and held a towel in his hands.

“Did you make this?” Nova held the comic up, unfazed. “It’s really good. I didn’t know you were an artist.”

Adrian pushed the towel into a basket and came forward, gently snatching the comic out of her hands. Nova noticed how his cheeks lit up. “It’s just something I’ve been working on,” he explained, shrugging and putting it back on the shelf. “Just a story.”

“Can I read it?”

“No!” Adrian’s eyes widened. “I mean, it’s not done yet, is all. I wouldn’t want you seeing something unfinished.”

She shot him a weird look and opened her mouth to respond, but Hugh poked his head in.

“Bed time, kids.” He stepped in all the way and started ushering Adrian to his bed. Nova watched as the man sat on the edge of his son’s bed and waited for him to get situated before tucking him in. She averted her eyes when Hugh bent over to plant a kiss on Adrian’s head, while Adrian protested and swatted him away. She quitted the room quietly and made her way down the hall to where they made her sleep, even though she never slept anymore. Not since she was six. Images of Mom and Papà flitted through her head, and she longed to be back in their arms in the safety of their apartment. It hadn’t been much, but it was home. Sometimes, especially recently, Nova thought about running away to the apartment and holing herself inside, but she knew the place would bring back too many bad memories.

The bedroom was dark and cold when she entered. The upstairs of the house gave her the creeps. Adrian was convinced it was haunted, and said so the first night she came home with them. She had laughed at him then, but night after night of wandering around the room and hallways led to her slowly believing him. It wouldn’t surprise her; Ace was responsible for the murders of the mayor and his family. Any ghosts surely didn’t want Nova there. Well, it wouldn’t be the first time she wasn’t wanted.

There was a soft knock on the door, and it opened a bit after Nova refused to respond, She didn’t even acknowledge Hugh as she started pulling back the covers, already in the set of pajamas they gave her.

Nova enjoyed Adrian’s company. She had never had friends her age, or friends at all really, if she didn’t count her family. The Anarchists...weren’t exactly friends either. She knew that they only watched her because Ace ordered them to. Adrian was like her, though. He was nine, but she had a birthday coming up in less than eight months so they were practically the same age. She knew she should hate him for his parents and affiliations, but it wasn’t his fault. That was all he knew. She could tell he was a good person, not like his Renegade parents. Being around them was different than being with Adrian.

“How are you liking the Everhart-Westwood residence, Nova?” His voice was cheerful. Nova didn’t care.

She shrugged, playing with the covers.

Hugh sighed. “Listen, Nova, there are things that you should know about your family, okay?” She glanced at him. He sat on the edge of the bed like he did with Adrian and reached over to pat her shin. “But...I’m afraid you’re going to have to be a little older to fully understand. Just know that...that your father would want you here instead of in the subway tunnels, okay? He was a good man and a good friend, unlike his brother who was narcissistic and hotheaded.” Nova deflated, and had to bite back arguing over what he believed was best for her. He was just saying these things to get her to open up and to turn against the Anarchists and her uncle. He didn’t care about her. If he did, her family would still be alive.

But still…”You knew Papà?”

Hugh smiled, though it was sad. “Yes. And there hasn’t been a day that has passed that I haven’t felt guilt for failing him. For failing you. But that’s a story for another day.” He paused and stood then, shaking his head. “Do you want to be tucked in? Adrian won’t admit it, but I’ve gotten pretty good at it since we adopted him.”

Nova shook her head, wanting to ask more questions but knowing they would lead to nowhere.

Hugh left and closed the door behind him softly, leaving her to a dark room and racing thoughts.

#renegades #archenemies #supernova #au #nova artino #adrian everhart #danna bell #narcissa cronin #ruby tucker #oscar silva #hugh everhart #simon westwood #max everhart #anarchists #my writing

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angelicmichael · 4 years

Text

Imminient Annihilation Sounds so Dope, Chapter Seven

Michael Langdon x reader

Summary: Reader confesses to Mallory that she met Michael and they go have a night out, execpt they run into a certain someone ;)

Words: 6.1k+

Warnings; Mentions of alcohol poisoning, and someone gets VERY drunk (not saying who cause I don’t wanna spoil it). For the sake of the fic pretend that all characters including the reader are of legal drinking age: please and thank you lol

A/N: Sorry for not updating this in so long 😶 I will be back to add a ‘read more’ line and add it to my master list in a couple days. Idk why all my chapters and fics are so fucking long I’m sorry 😂 this chapter was originally even longer but I cut it down believe it or not. I feel like the chapter is the ‘peak’ moment for the tension between Michael and Reader for sure. The tension and the dynamic between them is just so fun to write honestly haha. Reblog or like this if you enjoyed ♥️ also if u wanna be on the tag list let me know!! ALSOO this is readers POV and takes place about a day after the last chapter!

Previous Chapter

Next Chapter

You felt tense. That was the best way to describe how you felt but it also wasn’t. You felt a constant swirling storm inside of you since you met Michael. That storm made you feel different flavors and elements of being anxious and angry but being tense was the most prominent emotion of them all.

You made the difficult choice to lay low about your new powers, but that only seemed the make the crazed whirlwind of emotions you felt even worse.

You knew you were making the best decision by not telling the coven, it would only breed more chaos and make everything more complicated if you did decide to come clean about your powers. You hated to admit it but lying to Cordelia was too fucking easy.

Telling little white lies to Cordelia was easy anyway, however, pretending that you only had two powers everyday was not so easy. You could feel your new powers growing and itching to be used. It was almost like you had all of this pent up energy inside of you but no outlet. It seemed to burn at your fingertips and the fact that you couldn’t be your true authentic self in front of your sisters was slowly killing you and sending you into some kind of depression. You weren’t sure what was worse, going insane or letting the depression slowly eat away at you.

However hiding your new powers from your best friend was what was really proving to be the most difficult of all. You were normally a open book with Mallory, she knew everything that there was to know about you.. execpt for this. She didn’t know that you were now supposed to be the next supreme, and she certainly didn’t know that your powers were so strong that you were even stronger than the actual antichrist himself. And it was killing you not to tell her, and it was showing.

You had been drawing back and becoming reserved around Mallory over the past couple days, and it would be naive to say she didn’t notice. You knew she noticed but you two were just avoiding the topic.

Today was starting out as another typical morning for you. You and Mallory both got up, got dressed and were prepping to go downstairs to have another boring, dull day. Even though you had been distancing yourself from her you still waited to walk downstairs with her, and make small talk atleast. You atleast owed her that much.

You watched Mallory come out of the bathroom that was connected to your room, and shut the door. You stood up and approached your bedroom door; getting ready to leave but you felt a small hand touch your shoulder instead and stop you.

“(y/n), wait”.

You turned around and met Mallory’s sad honey colored eyes. It wasn’t just her eyes that seemed sad though, you could even hear it her voice. Something was wrong.

“Can we talk”?

She asked and you immeaditly nodded as you two both sat down on her bed. You couldn’t help but remember how last time you two sat on her bed to talk it was to discuss how you found out Micheal was your soulmate.. it seemed like only bad news was revealed on this bed.

“Yeah of course”.

You replied and took a deep breath and continued to keep talking instead of letting her talk.

“But it’s not fair to you Mallory that you have to be the one to initiate this conversation.. I.. Ive been hiding something”.

You spoke softly as you bit your lip. You could feel a pit in your stomach start to form as you did not want to continue to have this conversation with her but you knew you had too. You really shouldn’t have been keeping this information from her for so long in the first place. You noticed Mallory started to sit up a bit straighter as her eyebrows furrowed slightly in confusion. Her mouth opened like she was about to start talking when you cut her off once again.

“I hurt Madison”.

Your words came out shakily, and you made sure to utter them out as a whisper so that none of your sisters could hear. The only thing you really became conscious of was your breathing and your heart beating in your chest. Everything else in the world seemed completely silent and irrelevant. It was as if the world had paused for a couple of seconds until Mallory chose to speak again.

“Madison? How? Why-“

She looked awfully confused as she spoke, and the words seemed to come out quickly. As if she thought the faster she spoke the faster you would give her an answer.

“I didn’t mean too but Micheal wasn’t there at all at first, it was Madison and it was my only option - she would’ve killed me”.

“So it was self defense”?

Mallory asked, the confused expression she wore ealier melted away and now was replaced with a much more stoic and cold look. However, it still held a touch of softness. She had to know deep down that you wouldn’t do something like this unless it was absolutely necessary.. right?

“Yes! I would never hurt her otherwise and you should know that! I wouldn’t hurt a fly”.

You replied and this was when Mallory gave you a small smile and rubbed your shoulder gently with her hand.

“I know (y/n) it’s just I don’t want you to get in trouble. Maybe we should tell Cordelia”?

Mallory offered as she drew her hand back from you.

“There’s no way I could tell Cordelia, Mallory. You know that this whole situation would just stress her out even more than she already is. I feel like she already thinks that I can’t pull the whole ‘seduce Michael’ scheme off. This would just add fuel to the fire, you know”?

You asked her, biting your lip in frustration.

“No, your right. I’m sorry, I just- this whole thing is so complicated. It would just be nice to have a easy solution to all of this”.

Mallory replied with a giggle and a small smile. She looked at you and looked at the floor as if she was deep in thought, and when you got a look in her eyes - you saw a glimmer of adventure and playfulness in her eyes. It was the same glimmer that was in her eyes when you first met her - it was what drew you to her initially. Mallory turned her head back up to look at you and this time she was grinning.

“So your telling me that your powers are stronger than Madison’s? Because you look unscathed”.

She continued and you took a deep breath.

“I- yeah. That’s another thing.. I think seeing Micheal for the first time set something off inside of me because I have these crazy powers, Mallory. I- I stopped Michael from hurting me. I dont know exactly how but I did. Each day my powers seem to be growing and I don’t want to burden anyone else with this information so.. I just feel helpless”.

You ranted. You felt incredibly guilty as you spoke, you knew you were implying that you would be the next supreme but that’s not what you wanted. You didn’t want to be supreme. You didn’t want to take that away from Mallory, your best friend.

“I know your meant to be the next supreme and I would never want to take that away from you-“

You continued to talk but Mallory hugged you and before you realized it you stopped talking. You sat there on the bed speechless. You looked at the patch of sunlight that was in the room since the light was turned off and the curtains were drawn. You supposed noticing this ray of sun was a sign - a sign that things would finally get better and that Mallory would drag you out of this weird funk you’ve found yourself in the past couple days. Then Mallory started to speak,

“Don’t ever think that your taking something away from me. I never really wanted to be supreme anyway I mean, that’s a lot of responsibility and.. I don’t know (y/n) but maybe your not supreme. If your powers are really growing at the rate you said they were then wouldn’t Cordelia’s powers be dying out? And Cordelia’s powers haven’t been affected that I’ve noticed”.

By the time she was finished talking, Mallory stopped hugging you and was looking at you dead in the eyes. The patch of sunlight seemed to hit her and highlighted her dark brown eyes, making them look golden and honey brown. They were beautiful. She was beautiful.

But now was not the time to ogle at Mallory’s beauty; you knew she had a point. Cordelia was constantly teaching and preforming her powers, it would be obvious if her powers started to deplete.

“Yeah but what would that even mean? Would that mean I’m like some other entity like Micheal is? I mean, damn maybe I’m not even a witch at all”.

You were thinking outloud at this point. You crossed your arms gently as you started to get deep in thought. What the fuck would that even mean if you weren’t a witch? How many entities were there that even had ‘magical’ powers? And how would that even really make sense anyway? Your powers really only advanced so rapidly once you met Michael, before that you were just like any other witch. If you really were a entity or something, wouldn’t your powers manifested immeaditly? Plus, you think you would’ve noticed if you really were a demon or some shit.

“Well don’t jump to conclusions I mean, if you really want to know if your a witch you should talk to Cordelia. She would know. Taking the seven wonders wouldn’t be a horrible idea either”.

“Yeah.. maybe after this whole ordeal with Micheal is over though”.

It was nearly as if a lightbulb was turned on in Mallory, she suddenly lit up when you mentioned Micheals name and her mouth even dropped open slightly.

“I totally forgot about Micheal! What happened with Micheal when you met him? How did he not hurt you”?

She questioned and you licked your lips before you continued.

“Take a guess”.

You said with a smirk. It was as if she read your mind because she seemed to know immeaditly what you were talking about. She knew that you were implying that your powers were stronger than Michaels.

“No way! We need to tell Cordelia”!

Mallory’s face continued to light up but you simply shook your head.

“I cant, Mallory. I really can’t”.

You replied softly, trying to stifle a laugh. It made you happy to know that Mallory didn’t reject you or the idea that you might possibly be supreme. However the idea that you perhaps weren’t even fucking human at all overwhelmed you - to say the very least. For now, you were trying to ignore that little detail though.

“Well if your stronger than Micheal than there’s no reason to stay cooped up then, is there”?

“But the coven and Cordelia still need to think that nothing changed. They don’t even know that I met Micheal-“

“We’re going out tonight whether you like it or not. It’s a Friday, and no one will notice if we sneak out.. we deserve a nice night out stress free”.

She replied and you couldn’t help but agree to it. She had a point, it felt purely stupid now to hide away in Robichaux’s when you really had nothing to fear.. even if Micheal did show up, you were stronger than him.. when it came to him hurting you though. Who knows if you would be able to stop his powers if he tried to hurt someone else, like god forbid, Mallory. The odds of Micheal actually showing up tonight in Lousiana were slim to none though. Most likely the fucker was cooped up in his crazy expensive penthouse back in L.A.

But after all you deserved to have a nice night out. You deserved this.

It wasn’t hard to find a house party to go to on a Friday night in Lousiana.. it was nearly laughable at how easy it truly was. It was getting close to midnight and you and Mallory had just arrived, parking the black SUV about a block away from the party you two planned on ‘crashing’.

The house was huge, and college students decorated the yard and flooded the house - making the once spacious area seem cramped and tiny as you walked through the yard and then into the house with Mallory. Mallory led the way as she held your hand as to not get lost as you two had to push through people to find drinks.

It was difficult to be completely certain but with the limited decor you noticed on the walls, the house seemed to be a frat house which explained why all the boys looked like jocks and why all the females seemed to be dressed in minimal clothing. You and Mallory both sported black dresses, hers was long and flowy and fell to about her knees while your dress hugged your body a lot more and ended mid thigh.

You two looked like you belonged here, like you were a part of the party scene but you really weren’t. This was the first time you and Mallory had ever been to be a place like this... from what you heard - this seemed to be more of Madison’s scene. You know she frequently visited frat houses - probably even this one atleast once.

Thinking about Madison put a bad taste in your mouth - it made you incredibly sad. The image of how Madison’s body looked when you threw her against the wall played in your mind but you were quickly brought out of your thoughts when Mallory handed you a cup. You took a sniff of it and sure enough, whatever the substance was DEFINITELY had alcohol in it. You tried not to think to hard about what the substance exactly was before you completly chugged it. Mallory merely gawked at you.

“Your gonna get sick if you keep drinking that fast”!

Mallory yelled at you, you could barely hear her through the blasting music and all of the people talking. You simply giggled at her before replying.

“I’ll be right back”!

You yelled as you turned around, on a mission to find where the rest of the booze was. Of course you didn’t see where Mallory got your booze from in the first place, and it was fucking impossible to see where the kitchen was when you were literally shoulder to shoulder with strangers from how packed this house was.

You swear you could already feel the effects of the alcohol because you knew normally you would be gagging at the smell the house reeked of. It could be best described as pure sweat and maybe unwashed underwear?

You were pleasantly surprised to find that when you next opened your mouth, it was words that came out and not vomit. You didn’t even look to see who was next to you when you spoke; there were so many people in this god damn house - someone was bound to hear you. You had wandered off from Mallory as well, you couldn’t see her anymore but you really weren’t worried at the moment.

“Excuse me, do you know where there keeping the alcohol”?

You tapped the person who was next to you on the shoulder lightly.

The person had their back turned to you and as soon as you actually had time to look at them - you felt as if you had been stabbed square in the chest with fear.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

The person you tapped wore a full black outfit with hands crossed behind their back, and their fingers were adorned with several expensive looking rings. Their hair was a curly, beautiful, golden blonde that seemed to rest around their head like a nest or halo of some sort. You just knew that all of these features seemed to hauntingly familiar to you. Too familiar.

Your mouth fell open as you tried to back up but you ended up stepping on someone’s foot, you were trapped. This time, if it really was him, you didn’t have the luxury of running away like you did on the previous meeting. You didn’t know if it was worse to be alone with him or to be stuck with him in a room full of people. Hopefully you were just over reacting and this was just a doppelgänger at best.

The person (who you were hoping wasn’t Micheal) finally sauntered around to face you, you couldn’t help but continue to gawk at them with your mouth wide open. You knew if you continued to keep your mouth open you would surely attract flies so you managed to close your mouth.

You realized this person was wearing a light black cape with two golden claspes on each side with a golden chain running between the two claspes. You couldn’t help but briefly think how expensive those claspes probably were - fuck. All it took was for you to look up and meet his icy blue eyes. Fuck, those eyes. Once you pulled yourself out of the trance his eyes seemed to put you in, you then realized who you were staring at... oh no.

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck fuck!!

“I don’t, I was actually just looking for the drinks myself. Care to search with me”?

You stood there as he spoke, completly fucking baffled. You forgot you had even talked to him at all ealier, but he sure didn’t seem surprised to see you. Weird. It was almost as if he knew you were going to be here, but how was that even possible? He wore a smug smirk on his face while your thoughts started to race at one hundred miles per hour.

You tried to make it look less apparent that you were so shocked; it looked like he was getting off on the fact that you looked caught off guard. You didn’t know too much about him but you knew he had a thing for control and manipulation; and you weren’t about to let Langdon control you anymore than he already had.

“Wait.. What? What the fuck are you even doing here”?

You asked and threw your hands up in the air in frustration. The sheer hatred and anger you held in your voice got the attention of a few people who stood close to you but they quickly lost interest.. thank god.

You went to this party with the intention of finally letting go of fear and being able to be free and yet you ran into the person that you were dreading would be there. You felt incredibly angry that he took this night away from you, a night where you could just let go and have fun but now that was fucking gone.

It was odd how he wasn’t scared to confront you when he knew you were stronger than he is. It’s as if he got off on having control over you and your life, and even how you felt.. And you were so fucking over it. It was so fucking sick.

“I could easily ask you the same, couldn’t I”?

Micheal responded. Instead of yelling to talk to you, you noticed that he kept moving in closer and closer to talk to you and you were still trapped. You could feel your palms starting to itch with inticipation, waiting for the right moment to use your powers to attack - if it came to that but that was the absolute last resort. You were surrounded by way too many people to just use your powers freely like in the abandoned house you two had met in previously.

“You don’t own me Micheal. I’m sick of feeling like you control me, I feel like I’m not even in charge of my own emotions or actions anymore. And now when I finally try to have a night to forget about you, you fucking show up. So let me ask you again, what are you fucking doing here”?

You hissed. You kept your voice a little low, still yelling but not quite at the volume that would catch other people’s attention. You made sure to look right into Micheals eyes as you spoke, you wanted to show him you weren’t scared. There was no reason to cower from him anymore.

Micheal smirked as he glanced over his shoulder, as if he was making sure no one was picking up on your conversation. There was so many fucking people here, it was really hard to tell if any of them were purposely listening in or not. And even if they were listening, it probably just sounded like you two were exes that happened to run into eachother at a party.

“I’m here for the same reason you are. To forget about all of the bullshit that’s happened within this past week. So, C’Mon lets go take shots”.

Micheal said and actually grabbed your hand. Your mouth dropped once again as soon as he touched you, your not sure if it was from pure surprise or disgust.. maybe both? Your first instinct was to take back your hand and you tried to - you really did but the fucker seemed to have cat like reflexes and he caught your hand before you could yank it away too far.

You thought the first time you would touch your soulmate you feel sparks or fireworks and maybe even butterflies but when Micheal touched you, and was even leading you through the crowd now - you felt nothing of the sort.

You felt regret, nausea, and if anything it felt like you had almost been electrocuted when he touched you. And not in a good way.

He was moving through the crowd pretty damn fast, and he wasn’t really holding your hand - more so grabbing onto your wrist as if you were a kid who was about to be punished. You tried to slide your wrist out of his grip but he wouldn’t fucking let go, and it was really starting to hurt. You stumbled behind him and he continued lugging you through the crowd and to the kitchen; where there was definetly still a crowd but it was more dispersed and there was actually room to breathe. It was a little bit quieter here too, the music a little bit distant and the crowd was more sparse. It wasn’t nessacary to scream here to talk but you chose to anyway for your next sentence because you wanted to make sure he fucking heard you.

“Micheal let go”!

You yelled, you still couldn’t work your wrist free so you took your other hand to pry Micheals hand free off of you.

You noticed people were staring at you two - you didn’t look to see but you could feel their eyes on you. Micheal must’ve sensed that you two were getting attention because he finally let go of your fucking wrist. Ow. He might’ve let go because you were also digging your nails into his skin as well.

You rubbed your wrist which was now red as you frowned deeply. Even though your wrist was really just irritated and not actually injured; you still chose to put your other hand over your wrist and heal it. It’s not like anyone would notice, you doubted even Michael noticed what you were doing. However, What you really wanted to do was to continue to yell at Micheal but you knew you couldn’t do that now, espically since you just got people to stop staring. You cleared your throat.

“What the hell is this all about Micheal? Are you out of your mind”?

You hissed, glaring daggers at him as you spoke. You hurt Madison, why was he not furious with you? It made no fucking sense. And he wanted to take shots with you?? What??

You don’t know what exactly you were so mad about honestly, because this point it was fucking everything. You don’t know if it was the fact that he was trying to pretend everything was okay when it obviously fucking wasn’t, or the fact he was expecting you to just forget all of the bad blood that was between you too? Who knew at this point.

You waited for him to talk but instead he moved toward the counter to pour shots, you assumed since he was so hellbent on you two drinking together. You wouldn’t be surprised if he poisoned your drink honestly but something about Michael today seemed desperate, and sad. He really seemed like he was trying to get on your good side; maybe you were just reading him wrong but you felt like you could trust him tonight.

Michael didn’t even bother to turn around to reply to you; he kept his focus on the alcohol and not even making eye contact as he spoke.

“I told you, I’m done fighting”.

He said. He nearly slammed the alcohol bottle down onto the counter and he turned to look at you as he kept speaking. He first handed you your shot which happened to be clear in a tiny red plastic cup. You stared at the fluid in the cup suspiciously, and then you looked back up at Michael. You figured you would watch him drink his shot first before you had yours.

“The more I try to distance myself from you, the more I just end up getting fucking nowhere so I’m done trying to run away from you. Whenever I try to push you away someone ends up getting hurt, so It’s not worth it.. bottoms up”.

Micheal took his shot and downed it within seconds and slammed it back down on the counter. You noticed he was already reaching for the bottle to fill up his glass again. You continued to keep holding onto your cup absentmindedly as you watched Michael pour himself another glass. You couldn’t help but to notice how whenever he spoke tonight there seemed to be a desperation in his voice, it was as if he had given up. It almost made you feel bad for him.. almost.

You had to remind yourself who he was, and what his ultimate goals were. The only reason he was sad and angsty tonight was because he couldn’t manipulate you or use his powers against you, it wasn’t because he cared or felt any kind of empathy for you. It stung and hurt for you to acknowledge that but you knew you couldn’t let his charm cloud your judgement.

You already had a drink ealier but you figured this tiny shot wouldn’t hurt, being tipsy around Micheal couldn’t be TOO risky.. After all Michael seemed to be pretty cozy with drinking around you. You downed your shot and pull your small plastic cup back onto the table; assuming Micheal would fill it for you since he was still holding the bottle of alcohol.

You were about to speak but instead you heard someone else speak up and talk to Micheal instead.

“Why are you even taking shots? You might as well just drink the whole bottle at this point”.

It was an all too familiar voice, you whipped your head around and you saw Mallory. You exhaled and grinned, you were never happier to see another human being in your fucking life.

It’s not like you were alone with Micheal, you were surrounded by people but you felt alone. Micheal could do whatever he wanted to you here because you couldn’t use your powers. You felt isolated and alone but now with Mallory here? You were getting the fuck out. Nothing could stop you now.

You were surprised Mallory made such a snide remark to the damn antichrist of all people.. I mean she knew who he was.. right?

Micheal at first smirked, and then he full on laughed - it was like he was trying to hold it in at first. He was defintly feeling the alcohol you could only assume. You’d never seen him laugh before... you couldn’t decipher whether it was a true laugh or a sarcastic one from being challenged.

“Your right. I guess I will”.

Micheal announced, he placed his shot glass on the table and even slid it across. Your not sure if it slid naturally or if he used a bit of his magic - a quick glance around told you that no one seemed to notice or care execpt you.

He started to chug the bottle which happened to be a pretty big fucking bottle of Absolute Vodka. You watched his throat as his Adam’s apple continued to bob as he swallowed.. and swallowed and swallowed. You and Mallory’s mouth both dropped open, you didn’t know what the fuck to do. You both looked at eachother in shock as you watched the amount of liquid in the bottle start to grow smaller and smaller.

He was defintly going to get sick at this rate, and be drunk off his fucking ass. Yes, you hated him and wanted him dead but not like this. Choking on his own vomit and dying drunk and alone would be a fucking awful death; even for the antichrist. And lucky for him you actually gave a shit about people and their feelings.

You knew Cordelia’s ideal end game would be to have Micheal dead as soon as possible but if you could help it Micheal wasn’t going to die tonight. You would rather it be a quick and painless death if he had to die; dying by being drunk would not quick and painless. And on the other hand, Mallory didn’t even know this was Micheal yet. You assumed she probably thought this was just some guy you stumbled across - which wasn’t a totally wrong assumption. You brought your attention back to the man in front of you; who was still fucking drinking, the bottle was nearly empty.

“Hey! Stop”!

You hissed at Micheal. You gripped the end of the bottle and yanked it away from him - he had a damn good grip didn’t he?

The bottle was at least three quarters empty, fuck. You noticed Mallory gave you a weird look when you yelled at Micheal but you only did so cause you didn’t want to randomly name drop him, you figured they could have a (semi) proper introduction.

You still held onto the bottle as you shifted glances between Mallory and Micheal. You pointed at each of them with the bottle you held as you said their names.

“Mallory, this is Micheal. Micheal, this is Mallory”.

Mallory, who was staring at you before, instantly snapped her head toward Michael as her eyes grew wide. It was as if she was trying to convince herself that what you had just said wasn’t true. She looked completly panicked, in fact you could nearly feel the anxiety radiating off of her like how you would feel the heat rising off of a hot stove.

“This is Micheal”?!

Mallory asked in a panicked whisper. You merely nodded quickly. Micheal on the other hand looked purely amused, and swayed in place dangerously. If he wasn’t drunk before, he definitely was now. you had no doubt in your mind that he was reading and taking in all her thoughts right now, if he wasn’t too drunk to use his powers anyway. You weren’t drunk, maybe just a little tipsy at most but you could still feel the strength of your powers swirling inside you. Being intoxicated definitely had no effect on the strength of your powers - that was good to know. Michaels blue eyes flickered from watching Mallory to meeting your gaze.

You knew no one else execpt maybe Mallory was staring at you but you felt under the spotlight under Micheals gaze, almost like how a bug would feel right before being squashed. You started to sweat and shift uncomfterably in place. You felt even more uncomfterable as he spoke.

“Is this your new normal now? Do you always keep a posey of witches around you wherever you go? How about you just introduce me to rest”.

Micheal mused, you nearly screeched when he said the word ‘witches’ outloud. Even though he looked obviously drunk, his words came out smoother than silk - not stumbling on his words once. You found it odd Michael didn’t even bother addressing Mallory, not even respecting her enough to look her in the eyes. You assumed he knew she was a witch from reading her thoughts, or maybe he could just sense it. This seemed to piss you off any more of that was even possible. He could at least pretend to be civil.

“Micheal, What is your problem? Im not scared of you”.

You snarled, you stepped closer to him, just a foot away from his face as you stared him in the eyes. Even though you felt insanely nervous doing this, you knew Micheal couldn’t hurt you. You just needed to show him that you were in control for once. Not him.

You felt Mallory’s soft hand on your bicep, very gently pulling your arm back. You knew she was scared that you or Michael would start fighting.

“(y/n), we need to go”.

You heard her say. Micheal still had a smug smile on his lips and you wanted nothing more than to wipe it clean off.

You backed off though, you took a couple steps back and turned to Mallory; your back now to Michael. As you spoke, you felt Micheal tug on the bottom of the bottle you still held - trying to take it back - but you gently tugged it back. He was already drunk out of his mind, no fucking way he was having more.

“I can’t leave him like this, he’s going to get himself killed”.

You explained to Mallory, frowning. It’s not like you wanted to spend tonight babysitting Micheal but you couldn’t trust him to be by himself.. even if he was acting like a asshole and purposefully trying to piss you off. You could tell Mallory was about to protest by the look on her face but you spoke instead.

“Don’t worry about me I’ll be fine. Go home, I’m gonna stay with him”.

“There’s no way I’m going to let you do that, what if he hurts you”?!

“I’m not worried, I’m stronger than him. Plus he’s drunk, the only one he’s in danger of hurting right now is himself”.

You said with a giggle. Mallory quickly took a couple steps toward you and bear hugged you. You hugged her back and you could barely make out the words,

“Be careful. I’m gonna head back”.

You gave Mallory a somber smile as you watched her melt back into the sea of people as she left the kitchen. You turned your attention back to the drunk bafoon you had the pleasure of babysitting tonight.

You caught him dancing embarrassingly bad and trying to lip sync to whatever hip hop song was playing.. you could only laugh as you walked over to him.

After pick pocketing his phone from his back pocket of his jeans, you quickly got you two a Uber to wherever the hell Michael was staying this time.

You could only hope it was another nice penthouse like how his one in L.A. was.

While holding his phone; you didn’t mean to snoop or go through anything execpt the Uber app (which you downloaded) but.. a message notification popped up.

A quick glance at Michael told you that he wasn’t paying attention, the dumbass was too drunk to even notice you took his phone in the first place.

You looked over back at his phone and first noticed the message was from Madison, and then you noticed what the message even was.. a photo. It looked to be a photo of.. oh my god.

Was that Madison? Was that a fucking nude? Your mouth opened and your shut his screen off, you immeaditly handed his phone back over to him which he reluctantly took with a confused puppy look.

By how Michael was talking ealier you thought that maybe he wanted to make mends but if he still had this kind of relationship with Madison, what did it even mean? What did any of this mean? You saw first hand though how in love he was with her. He wasn’t just going to break up with her, you should’ve known that.

You shook your head, atleast you knew you had a lot to think about tonight.

Taglist: @mindlesschicca @mina672 @guiltyfiend @michaellangdonstanaccount @9layerdevilsfoodcake

#lemme know how trash this chapter was lol #i feel like the writing in the beginning and end is good but in the middle its kinda meh?#writing drunk michael is SO fun #next chapter is pure drunk michael content #michael x reader #michael langdon x reader #imminient annihilation sounds so dope #my fic #ahs

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starbuck09256 · 4 years

Text

A chance of chess

Early MSR AU

Tagging the always wonderful @today-in-fic

rated PG (at least this first part)

The soft spring breeze fills his nostrils as he runs through the park. His breath steady as his heart rate increases. Since moving back to DC he has been to a few parks trying to find the one with the best route. This one is filled with cherry tree blossoms and beautifully lined trees. It also has some basketball courts and an area where people can play chess. The neighborhood isn’t really close to his own home but it’s worth the extra 10 minutes of running to get here. The biggest ticket will be the coffee shop, with a decent cappuccino and a good drip at a decent price. He wonders if this is where he will fight the monsters that Patterson has been bringing to his tiny lair in the basement. After being so successful with Monty Props he earned the right to leave the normal BAU section into a forgotten dungeon in the basement. But he loves it down there. The noise dimmed the lights bright and his focus uncompromised by the chatter of useless gossip around him. He can leave the area a mess and no one cares. He can stay until 2am without someone lecturing him to go home and get some so called “rest”. This park is beautiful and the neighborhood is not as up and coming as to guarantee an overpriced lack luster cup of joy. He continues around the path sees a set of one man sitting alone at a chess table small pieces placed on their respected places as he looks down at his watch. Another gentlemen finally gets up walking over to the balding man and touches his shoulder. He gives a sad expression that even in the few short years he has been with the FBI is idneitifalable even at this distance, the death of a person seems to manifest in similar ways across the races. The sadness that racks through the bald man's eyes is paulable. His broad shoulders sigh in defeat as he starts to look at the small pieces in front of him. He hasn’t played a game of chess in awhile. In one of his advanced psychology classes they use it as a way to understand the mind of others. Chess is a game played first in the mind and then on the board, intent, sabotage, traps, or just luck playing in a way that riddles the ways of society. His heart rate comes down and he walks to the man. He hasn’t packed up yet and while he doesn’t want to intrude he sees an opportunity to further his love of the game. But the man stands he is younger than Mulder thought his broad shoulder and the way he carries himself scream military. Mulder can’t help himself.

“Wanna play a game?” the bald man gives him a sad smile.

“Not today, but tomorrow I would be happy to kick your ass.”

Mulder can’t help but smile. “Pretty sure of yourself there?” he can’t help but grip.

“See you at 7.” the bald man walks down towards the street turning to walk down the block.

He’s ran around the park twice. He got there early already invigorated by a new challenge. He even reviewed a few classic chess moves last night. The bald man is there setting up quietly. Mulder approaches.

“Ready old man?” he says as he jogs up to the table.

“I doubt I’m a whole lot older than you Mister?”

“Fox Mulder, just Mulder is good.”

“Walter Skinner, Skinner is fine.” Mulder nodded and sat down.

“You ready?” he asked.

Skinner adjusted his glasses and peered over the younger man.

“Absolutely. White or black Mulder?” He takes the white and helps set up the board.

The two of them were evenly matched in skill. Mulder tries different psychological games on the older man with no success. After several stalemates and a win for each of them. Mulder thanks Skinner.

“Same time next week kid?” Skinner asks and Mulder nods.

And so it goes for several months when Mulder was in town. Skinner and him would pay two times a week. They would talk about the nonessential things, Skinner was a hard man to read. Mulder ends up doing most of the talking. Then on one buserly morning Skinner wasn’t there. Mulder looks around and waits for almost an hour. Another gentleman whom he knows by the name of Frohike comes over.

“Skinman is in the hospital.”

“Shit, what for?”

“He was shot had to have an operation and the best doctor flew in for it. Heard the doc is quite a looker.”

Mulder sighs and takes his pieces back to his basement. He taps his fingers along the case file. Finally after concern eats at his resolve he heads back to the park to ask which hospital Skinner is at. Two hours and a phone call to Patterson later he is outside Skinners room watching a beautiful redhead in a white coat annihilate him at chess faster than Mulder thought possible. He could feel her laughter through the door, her bright hair was just like her smile. She was so tiny in that over-sized doctor coat even though she had 2 inch heels on. Mulder is slightly fixated on her. He knocks on the door waiting for an introduction. Skinner grunts as he welcomes him.

“Had to come down here for your weekly ass-kicking?” Skinner mutters moving in the hospital bed to shuffle his big frame with the wires from the IV. Mulder chuckles.

“Hi Fox Mulder, glutton for punishment.” he smiles at the pretty doctor. Skinner interrupts him “Agent Fox Mulder with the FBI” she steps back slightly, and Mulder can’t help feeling a little smug at the clear pass Skinner is throwing at him.

“Doctor Dana Scully.” her grip is delicate and strong at the same time.

She smiles at him. Mulder can not help stare into her deep sea blue eyes. He clears his throat, her hand had felt warm and welcoming in his hand. She has soft delicate features and he realizes how right Frohike was, she was more than just a looker.

“So how is the old man doing?” his voice doesn’t hold back the concern he feels.

“Not that old Mulder.” Skinner coughs. Scully chuckles.

“He.. uh... took a bullet about 2 centimeters away from the lung cavity. He is very very lucky to be alive. Even if he is terrible at Chess.” her eyes darting to Skinners.

Skinner coughs again. “Yea, yea. I lose to this fool a lot too.”

Mulder can’t help but chuckle at that. Skinner has certainly gotten better and he has become much less rusty.

“Ah, So your a doctor and amazing at chess?” Mulder asks and Scully blushes slightly at that.

“Uh I would say your friend is not that good, could be the meds though.” She is polite and not egocentric.

“So Agent Mulder, maybe you can shed some light on the creep men that keep coming by and peering in on Mr. Skinner. Since Mr.Skinner refuses to provide any details as to where and when he was shot. Maybe you as his friend can convince him to bring the perpetrator to justice.” Mulder eyes dart to the man.

“Doctor Scully can I have a minute alone with Agent Mulder”

“Sure Walter maybe he can talk sense into you.”

She hands Mulder Walters file and walks out the door. Mulder watches her as she leaves. He turns to Walter,

“wow doctors like that I can see why you’ve extended your stay.”

Skinner grunts. “She’s pretty but also a hard ass, like someone I know.” Mulder can’t help but chuckle.

“You should play her sometime Mulder, she’ll give you a run for your money.”

He starts to cough then. Mulder gets up from the seat next to him checking his lines.

“Hey, hey” Walter spurters. Mulder grabs him a glass of water on the table.

“What the hell happened to you Walter? Afraid the pretty doctor will find out you are NSA?”

Walter rolls his eyes. He mutters thanks and settles in.

“Mulder if I was ever going to suggest a woman to keep you in line and be your ally, it would be her, I’ve known Doctor Scully for a long time. Was a good friend of her fathers before he died last year. She took it rough. Changed careers, she was at the Farm.”

“She’s ex CIA?”

Mulders was impressed before now he was down right shocked.

“Yes, she is smart and capable of taking both of us done in seconds. But she is also very guarded and lonely.”

“Right because you would know that.”

Mulder is now seeing where this whole thing is going.

“Well I’m dating her mom so yea..” Mulders eyes flash up to his bald friend.

“Walter you keep unfolding like a flower.”

“Yea well just challenge her to chess, see if it can lead to a dinner.” He coughs again.

Mulder helps Walter settle back in shaking his head.

“I don’t know Walter,” Walter looks at him.

“I haven’t known you very long Mulder, but Dana’s been through a lot and she could use a friend, and someone decent at chess.” Mulder nods

“I’m going to get a cup of coffee.”

Walter sighs as the door swings close and Mulders footfalls fade.

The coffee is terrible and he almost spits it out while looking around the small cafeteria. Doctor Scully is sitting in a corner reviewing a file. She catches his eye and smiles. It’s soft but it doesn’t reach her eyes. He sees it now the underlying fear within her. He goes over and pulls out his bag of chess pieces.

“Skinman has said you are a formidable force, have time for a game?” he asks.

He is a little shy, he hasn’t dated much since being in DC. She bites her lip and looks at her watch he watches as she reaches up and rubs her face.

“Ok one game.” she concedes and Mulder can’t help the grin that spreads across his face.

He sets up the pieces and she can’t help but laugh at his spock figurine for a Bishop.

“What?” he asks and laughs when he sees her point.

“Oh yea lost a piece not too long ago anyway. Black or white doctor Scully?”

“Just Scully is fine, white Mulder.”

“He's talked about me hasn’t he?” at her sheepish look up.

Mulder realizes that the beautiful Doctor Scully is kind, thoughtful and must be crazy.

“He told you I was crazy?” Mulder huffs

She can’t help licking her lips “He might have mentioned the alien thing..yea” but she doesn’t laugh at him.

“And you still want to do this?” he nods towards the game.

“From what Walter said, I think we could both use someone to just talk too.” Mulder nods smiling at her.

One game turns into five Mulder 3 Scully 2. When she gets paged she writes down her number on a napkin and the words rematch. He grins all the way out to his car.

He waits one day and calls her. She answers on the second ring, and while it starts with talking about chess it ends 5 hours later at 1am when her soft snores come across the line. She calls him the next day to apologize for falling asleep on him. He tells her she can make it up to him by having dinner together. After a fair amount of time which scares the hell out him that he pushed too far too soon she sighs yes. He doesn’t know the history there but from the sound of it she’s been very hurt in a prior relationship, making dating unappealing. So he does one better and says how about just coffee. He can almost feel her smile through the phone, perfect she says. They meet on a rare Saturday morning they would both normally work and he walks with her around the same park he met Walter over a year ago. Coffee turns to lunch then to a new thriller at the local theater then to hours spent rummaging through a vintage bookshop. When 7pm rolls around she looks up from the copy of Jose Chungs catching his eye over his copy of a popular sci-fi. She comes up and brushes his arm,

“Maybe dinner too..” her smile is soft and shy and he can’t imagine a world without it.

The dinner goes great and he calls her as soon as he gets home. She hesitates a bit and feels like they are rushing into something.

“Something good I hope?” he can’t help the pleading in his voice.

There is no one on the planet he has been able to handle for an entire day, let alone want to spend the entire evening talking to as well. He has so many questions, so many theories and all of the sudden he wants her opinion on them all. Doctor Scully is captivating, she is brilliant, kind, funny and drop dead gorgeous in a way that should make her much more pretentious and not nearly so available. She talks to him anyway even though they talked most of the day, even though she doesn’t like butter on her popcorn she might be perfect. Then when he pushes for another date she says “I don’t think so.” and he hears the soft click that matches the sound of his heart breaking.

#mulder and scully #au #early meeting #chess #myfic #the x-files #fanfic #msr #fluff #with a side of angst

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limelocked · 4 years

Note

Naruto OCS???? Do tell us about them

oh now youve got me started!

i made a post about their history (very general) in this post so ill talk more about their personalities and things that stand out about them cuz i love them

so the tldr is that they’re an off shoot of the uchiha clan from the first great ninja war when yokumo fucked straight off from konoha due to 75% paranoia that turned to 99% paranoia when he left but cant go back now! hed be a rogue nin! so he settles down in the land of grass with Asaro the most best girl character ive ever made. She’s a tailor/seamstress/weaver in this tiny village and she just radiates chill, shes been your mom friend since grade 2 and will continue to be your mom friend until death

yokumo is Stressed and Strict because my dude has the sharingan so when they have three kids (not at the same time hot damn) he decides like any good parent to just refuse to let them use their eye powers at all (note: this is probably not a good parenting tecnique)

tenjo is the oldest daughter and she idolizes her dad so fucking much dude and shes fighty, boy pulls her hair and gets an ass whopping , shes the queen of the village kids but with different leading skills than her mom. she legit saw yokumo use jutsu ONCE and went “oh hell yeah time to be ninja”

yokumo said no

jiyuro is the middle kid and he just vibes dude, hes a normal easy going kid that reaps the reward of being the sibling of the queen of kids, hes also the kind of bastard that can and will use his sharingan to cheat in exams, something he can only pull of thanks to the babiest brother 30 under 30 ninja luminary chiban who cant use the sharingan but damn is that boy neck deep in genjutsu training

chiban put like all his dnd leveling towards genjutsu and some taijutsu so he wouldnt mcfucking die in the middle of a fight in the event that his genjutsu fails. his illusions are amazing tho and real specialised, he can make you believe that those eyes? those red eyes with weird dots in em? yeah totally normal, you didnt see shit. the same with cuts and bruises, dude specialices in detailed genjutsu instead of haha you got caught in a plant or some of the other ridiculus shit naruto characters do

now tenjo gets married not once, not thrice but two times, first time to your local imported bitch boy hatsunaio ha’ame whos playing the longest con in existance aka he “falls in love” with tenjo and gets married, has a kid, all so he can confirm that the clan has the sharingan to report back to konoha cuz that aint right, sharingan outside of konoha and even more sharingan outside a hidden village

fear not tought! imported asshoe gets killed by tenjo with the sweet loot of the mangekyou sharingan and Trauma!

her second marrage is 4-5 years later with drinker of respecting woman juice Tsumashin Aishika who had been a family friend since a bit after ha’ame got what was coming to him. Aishika is super patient and just Kind Man, if only he was stupid and buff he would be a himbo but he’s average and kinda smart so Good Dad will have to do. He likes to read and is a wood worker.

Tenjos kids are a fucking story too, btw hope you wanted a long long post cuz youve really gotten me started now

Renge, the kid she had with Ha’ame, is the oldest and she doesnt remember her dad at all, shes been called a clone of her mom with the fightyness and the “wow cool! need to learn that!” reaction to jutsu. Shes impulsive if shes on her own and the worlds biggest glass canon in a fight because she has trash chakra stores and the impatience to skip on learning to distrobute it properly, she also has the vibration style kekkei genkai (lightning + wind) which just eats up her chakra

first kid with Aishika is Hotoki whos like her mom but EXTREME, shes the naruto of the kadzuki fam, impatient, a brat and ready to throw down instantly, shes stubborn as fuck and she wants to be the Tsukikage, a position that doesnt exist for a village that doesnt exist in a land that already has a hidden village. her family is supportive tho

last kid is Makuto whos one of only three kids in this clan thats youngler than naruto. his life starts of great by killing his mom with complications during birth giving him absolutly no problems down the road, nope, haha. Hes pretty reserved and likes his grandmas craft better than his grand dads so he takes up tailoring and later pottery, hes a fast learner 100% because of the sharingan

then we have jiyuros wife Pantama Hoshi, shes friend shaped and radiates chill like asaro. they met while team one (aka tenjo, jiyuro and chiban) was out at another town for a mission. shes a gardener and grows medicinal herbs along with real good flowers. theyre by far the most calm parents in the family and basically became foster parents for Tenjos kids once she died so yes, they have two dads. Hoshi can and will support you in anything thats not plain out stupid

Jiyuros first kid is Nishi whos good and cautious, shes the single kid in the budding team 2 that thinks things through properly before doing something, but too much, shes a pesemist, and probably has anxiety, on the upside all of the plans shes involved with goes without a hitch because she provides endless “what if bad thing happens” scenarios, in the downside plans take so much longer because of said what ifs, she specialises in sealing and summoning but really really wants to be a medical ninja because you see what if someone gets hirt! what if renge becomes dumb bitch during a mission and gets hurt because shes a glass canon

the second kid is Takuhi whos the mediating voice of reason that pushes Renge to listen to what ifs and makes Nishi remember that sometimes improv is whats needed during a mission, hes on the cautious until proover otherwise side. He hangs out with Yokumo a lot and is slowly inhereting his paranoia and or world waryness

TIME FOR MY FAVE BRANCH

Chibans family is amazing because i love them, his wife Yamatora Seiho, usually called by her last name, is an ex shinobi from the land of grass (she freaked Tenjo out a bunch after the Ha’ame bullshit went down) thats just so fucking done with the kage and government so she went to do that good good farming cottage core life but shes really not suited for it. shes ready to throw the fuck down at any time but shes also kind to her kids and real serious

she also had a previous marrage that ended in good ol murder (not her killing her husband for once in this clans history) but basically she took her at the time 5 y/o son Usagi with her and Chiban said fuck it join the family instantly

Usagi feels so fucking left out tho cuz he wants to be included in the playing the other kids do but he cant manage to care about that whole ninja thing plus he doesnt have eye powers and just why bother, so instead he goes to Asaro and asks her to be his teacher, he also becomes a barber in the town because my god did Jiyuro really just almost cut his sons ear off???

THEN THE TWINS!!

Hikame and Yorukoi are twin girls and the other two that’re younger than naruto in the clan, theyre 9 when hes 12. They spend their time usually together or with Hotoki and Makoto since Usagi is 13 years older than them and Renge, Nishi and Takuhi are team 2 on missions a lot. Yorukoi really loves animals and looks up to Nishi because holy shit mom she can summon animals with only a lil blood holy fuck meanwhile Hikame likes art and drawing the aimals Yurokoi comes sprinting home to tell everyone she found

The twins and Hotoki will make up Team 3 just as soon as Yokumo lets them because oops a few years ago the whole konoha branch of the uchiha got fucking annihilated and we might be next.com

#long as fuck post #kadzuki clan #god i love the fam so much #all of them are so dumb #the twins become friends with Zeiten and yknow thats the real reason Kyorinrin gets convinced to stay and teach Nishi medical ninjutsu #naruto ocs #naruto oc

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trek-tracks · 5 years

Note

Hello i love your blog soo much!! I just finished to read your fics recommendations. And everyone of it were so good and well written i can't even start describing it!!?? I almost had a heart attack half way through them 💛 I wanna ask you if you can give us more suggestions. You 👏have 👏such 👏a 👏good 👏taste.

All right. So. Sorry to leave this unanswered for like three weeks, but I had many thoughts to think on it! Thank you so much for your kind words about my blog; they mean a lot. So much, that I’ll destroy any pretense on Tumblr that I don’t read fan fiction, just for you. See what I do for you? :)

If anyone reads my blog at all, I think I’m pretty clearly biased toward Bones (“What?! No way!” says everyone, extremely sarcastically), so all these fics are Bones-centric. Sorry, that’s just what you’re going to get with me, but if you like my blog, chances are you have a soft spot for Bones as well.

I think you have already seen my post where I recommended, along with Equilibrium (#1 and still champion) and everything else PSW has written for TOS, some other gen TOS fics with Triumvirate feels, but here they are again for everyone else:

Hope, Logic and Other Wastes of Time by pantswarrior (the return of Xenopolycythemia, with fantastic characterization)

Watching the Watcher by stillwaters01 (and everything else by her as well): Great for Bones and Chapel, very medically detailed, hugely introspective.

Mudd in Your Eye and The Vestorian Quandary by Avirra (who also has some excellent series work; these have really interesting plots and Bones badassery)

Now, here are some more recommendations. This is by no means a comprehensive list of everything, only my thoughts at the current moment. One writer I was going to recommend deleted everything from AO3, alas. I might add on to it later, as I am absolutely sure I’ve forgotten things. To try to narrow this down, I’m going to try to steer clear of complete AUs. Mostly.

As is my wont, I am also largely going to recommend non-explicit or only briefly-explicit stuff, as I try to keep this blog on the PG side. I can’t remember all the details about everything, so check the tags before you decide to read, and make the decision that’s best for you.

Gen TOS recommendations:

Through a Mirror Darkly by GenuineSnoof is new; it’s a TOS/AOS crossover with Prime Spock and Bones (both Boneses, in different times) dealing with the Mirror, Mirror mind meld.

Other Gen stuff dealing with the Mirror, Mirror mind meld includes

Memories From A Past Not My Own by PSW

Of Mirrors by EmRose92

Bad Luck and Broken Soul by @apathetic-revenant

The Wicked and Divine by Danzinora Switch (also try by this writer: Peace and Long Life, where Spock and McCoy accidentally transport themselves to Vulcan’s far past; Silence is Key, McCoy vs. Romulans; and Project Memory, one of few worthwhile codas to Spock’s Brain)

ThatSassyCaptain writes some good stuff. Weight is a nice shortish character study off some canon episodes. The Dog Days Are Most Certainly Not Over features McCoy and giant doglike creatures. It’s very silly, and very enjoyable. Also, its sequel just happened to update yesterday for the first time in something like a year.

I remember KCS being a good writer. Try Watching the Watchman, but look around at other stuff, too.

Incubation by Swiss Army Knife: Bones comes back from City on the Edge of Forever with smallpox and has to find a cure before he and everyone on the ship dies. Kirk is a jerk (okay, he’s still traumatized over Edith, but still). Spock is awesome. #ProtectHim

icarus_chained writes some great short character studies.

There are some very long works by Mary R. and Lynn S., which are older pieces but luckily online; try Unspoken Truths, which deals with The Enterprise Incident, and Betrayed (So. Much. Angst. So much. This one is really well-written, but also a really hard read.)

I haven’t read The Dorian Solution in a long time (it’s novel-length, as I remember), but it’s a very interesting premise: McCoy and Kirk accidentally partake in a planet’s ritual that allows one person to take on all the other person’s subsequent injuries. Guess who gets the short end of the stick on this one?)

Imperfections by Amatara: Canon expansion: episode/movie scene additions from The Man Trap to Generations. Fantastic characterizations and UGH MY HEART at that ending.

Gen AOS recommendations:

anonymous - The One Who Is Fire. Bones screws up a First Contact by being emotional. Gets whumped. Much action; much angst. Very Triumvirate. Just on this side of overwrought, but very satisfying and full of the feels.

rustingroses - That Which We Find In Others. Spock and Bones. Earthquake. Trapped. Long talk. Fascinating.

Hollow Earth by beamirang (yes, another xenopolycythemia fic. Whatever. Everyone bands together to find a cure. Many feels.)

Aini_NuFire - Do No Harm: Short adventure with more Bones badassery

Now, various slash-type-things.

TOS/Both TOS and AOS

@klmeri is the reigning champion of McSpirk fic, is all-around stellar, and has even written a couple of stories based on my overly-detailed prompts: Grave or Gone and In Winter Snow Angels Sacrifice. My favourite, though, is Younger than Stars, which has a great, conspiracy-filled plot, and feels aplenty. But just read starting anywhere, honestly. Read them all.

TheRev - Lovely writing. Spones. Try This Must Be the Place (AOS with Spock Prime/McCoy Prime; you will cry) or Nothing By Halves (TOS)

Eddaic - The Wind Here Sings: TOS Spones. Canon-adjacent. Very poetic.

AOS

I’ve already recommended @fireinmywoods’ sneaky, intricately-plotted and swoonworthy Palimpsest and other writing (McKirk), but for comprehensiveness’ sake, here she is as well (she’s also one of my favourite humans on Tumblr). Sometimes explicit.

Mardia - Fortunate Son: AU where Kirk wasn’t on Tarsus IV, but Bones was, as a 19-year-old doctor under the supervision of Dr. Philomena Boyce. The writing on this one is phenomenal, and the use of interwoven flashbacks with the present is stunning. Even explains why Kirk and McCoy’s eye colours switch in AOS. This is a must-read. One sex scene; can be skipped. McKirk.

laughter_now writes some great stuff. Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder is also a must-read. So much suspense, featuring Bones being a righteous self-sacrificing badass and awesome doctor. For sheer h/c angst and suspense with a happy ending and a description of drowning that literally made my lungs hurt in sympathy, go for Hold on Tight, I’ll Hold My Breath. McKirk.

Zauzat’s Honourable Enemies is also a must; it has one of the most satisfyingly-crafted plot resolutions I’ve seen in fic. Everything from the beginning pays off at the end. Everything. It’s pretty much movie-ready, except it’s Spones, and I think Beyond is about the Sponesiest they’d ever be willing to go. https://archiveofourown.org/works/225404/chapters/341313

PrairieDawn’s A Matter of Trust strung me out for the past 24 agonizing weeks, but just finished; lucky you. Spones AU with Kirk and McCoy on a medical ship captained by Pike. Joanna was injured in the Vengeance incident and has telepathy issues. Spock is a healer. Makes good use of the Operation: Annihilate! premise. Crisp, evocative, compelling writing.

JoulesMer does a bunch of effective McKirk stuff with Pike and Boyce. Try The Red Wheelbarrow, Xenopolycythemia, or S.O.S. Great for angst and feels and happiness, romance and self-sacrificing idiots. Some stuff is rather explicit.

Gammadolphin is another very entertaining writer who does a lot of McKirk/McSpirk and AUs. It’s all pretty worthwhile, even the incomplete ones. Try A Wish in the Dark for a Bulletproof Heart (similar premise to The Dorian Solution, actually). Also has a range of stuff from non-explicit to explicit.

The Time and Space Are Not Conditions By Which We Live Series by ijen: McSpirky mission moments.

…okay, I’m going to cut it here for my own sanity. Aren’t you sorry you asked?

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padfootagain · 5 years

Text

Singles Will Be Paired (IV)

Part 4: La Vie En Rose and Göttingen

Here we go with a new part of my Ben series! All cuteness once again ;) I hope you like it! I would advise you to listen to the songs I make reference to when you read this :)

Honestly… is there a word to describe something fluffier than fluff? Because I've reached this level of cuteness with this chapter. I'm warning you.

Gif not mine

Word Count : 3919

You felt like a teenager all over again.

What was happening to you?

You knew perfectly well what was happening, although you refused to face the truth: Charming Stranger had happened.

For the tenth time, you checked your clothes in the mirror before you. You couldn’t possibly wear this ugly jumper anymore. After all, you took today as a date, you needed to impress him.

You snorted at your own thoughts. Impress him? He had already seen you in that horrible jumper, you had crushed his fingers while you were scared, you had partially annihilated his hearing because of your terrified shouts… not to mention the whole incident with the hot chocolate…

You put on your coat and scarf, grabbed your bag and closed the door of your hotel room behind you. It was time to go. You would need some time to go to the Eiffel Tower and you didn’t want to be late. Although… perhaps you were worrying a little too much about this date. Since when did you even care about men, huh?

You walked in the elevator with a determined expression on your face. You would have a nice time in Paris, and spending some time with Ben was only a bonus. Or not even a bonus. You didn’t care. Yes! You didn’t care about what he thought of you. You had not crossed the sea to find love but to relax and enjoy some magical and well-deserved holidays.

You walked through the hall crowded with tourists speaking many different languages that you didn’t understand. Right before you pushed the glass door opened, you looked at the mirror on your right. And before you exited the hotel, you checked your reflection one last time…

-----------------------------------------------------

Ben was way too nervous.

Why was he so nervous? He felt like a teenager waiting for his first date all over again.

What was happening to him?

He knew perfectly well what was happening, although he refused to face the truth: you had happened.

He checked his watch again, shivering in the cold winter wind. He was ten minutes early…

Actually, he had been waiting for around fifteen minutes already. He had been so scared to be late that he had wildly underestimated the power of Paris' subway. So now, he was standing still, right under the Eiffel tower, freezing to death but not really minding the cold, as he was way too nervous to care about such futile things. He had a tight knot in his throat and his stomach felt all strange…

A small smile formed on his lips. He knew he was being ridiculous to feel this way, and yet, he couldn't help it. It was all your fault.

He looked around him, through the crowd that hurried to and fro. It blocked Ben's view towards the Champ de Mars and the long avenues that boarded the passage. On his left and right, the metallic feet of the tall tower were bathed with tall trees, and in the distance, he could even see people relaxing under the sun near two little ponds. He turned around, his gaze passing over the bridge of Iéna to settle on the building he guessed in the distance, his sight crossing the Seine to reach the Trocadéro. It had rained during the night, and the ground was still slightly glimmering under the pale sun. The town had a particular scent that Ben had not met anywhere else in the world. It smelled sweet, familiar and welcoming and yet he knew he had never smelled anything quite like it before. It reminded him of the scent of his parent's garden during summer storms. He failed at defining the smell, but he didn't mind. It felt good anyways.

He filled his lungs with this peculiar scent before turning around again, his dark eyes scanning the crowd in search for your face. He sniffed while a few feet away, a musician was settling down, taking out a saxophone and shuffling in his bag in search for a warm hat. A few seconds later, he was starting to play, the hat dropped before his feet to invite the passing crowd to give him a coin or two.

Something caught his attention, a tiny detail in the crowd, or perhaps was it more of a feeling or something at the corner of his eyes…

He turned towards the distant Trocadéro again, and his eyes needed no more than a second to find yours.

Behind him, the trumpetist had started to play the soft and yet happy melody of La Vie En Rose.

God, did it sound cliché… A musician playing that famous song to satisfy some stupid tourists' fantasy about Paris. The Eiffel Tower literally towering you. The distant roaring of traffic shushed by the music, the pale sun of December glimmering on the concrete still drenched from the rain of the previous night, how he looked stunning in his dark warm coat and his hair messed by the soft wind, your eyes meeting and locking and unable to part again…

God, it did sound cliché.

As you walked to join him under the large monument, you couldn't find a way to care though. Because perhaps it was cliché, but it felt so good…

The closer you were to him, the brighter your smiles to both you and Ben became. And when you finally reached him, you were both grinning like idiots.

It took the two of you a few seconds to be able to speak… or even breathe, actually. You were staring at each other, and it felt like the crowd around you had disappeared. Of the whole world only remained the melody of La Vie En Rose, the sweet smell of Paris and the two of you.

"Hi," Ben let out in a breath.

"Hi."

You both shied away a little, chuckling and giggling uncomfortably, and yet your eyes never left his.

"You…"

He fell silent again, and you silently encouraged him to go on. He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times before being able to speak the words he longed to let out. His heart was beating so fast, he could barely breathe at all. Yet, he found out that the knot in his throat had disappeared and the feeling in his stomach had turned into butterflies.

"You look… breathtaking."

Your entire face felt on fire, and you blamed the cold for it, although you knew that it was all Ben's fault.

"You…" you tried to answer but the words wouldn't come.

Ben raised an eyebrow, apparently amused.

"I?" he invited you to pursue.

"You… you look… okay."

He nodded, although you could see that he was… disappointed? No, disappointed was not the right word. Fragile. Fragile was better at describing the look in his eyes as he let his stare fall from your gaze to the tip of his dark shoes.

"Thanks," he mumbled.

You closed your eyes, wincing as you mentally cursed yourself. Your mind was still struggling to function though, and you forced your brain to create thoughts again.

"I mean…"

You started to laugh. A nervous laugh that turned in a merry one, and Ben looked up at you again, a tender smile back on his lips.

"I'm sorry," you went on, feeling your brain slowly going back to normal. "You… You're very handsome, I'm just… kind of a mess, I guess. But you are… you are much more than 'okay', you are like… like so much more than 'okay'…"

It was his turn to laugh… at you.

"You are sinking and sinking, you should stop talking," he mocked, and you playfully slapped his shoulder.

You took a moment to look around you, taking in the beautiful sight, until Ben offered you his open hand.

"Shall we go up there?" he asked, looking up at the iron tower above you, before setting his warm eyes back on yours.

You nodded.

"Let's go, then!"

You slipped your fingers in his palm and he closed his hand upon yours. His long fingers wrapped around yours, a little calloused against the soft skin of the back of your hand. You walked together across the crowd to climb up the Eiffel Tower, and all this time, your two hearts were beating so fast…

You paid for your tickets and climbed to the first floor. Silently, you walked around, watching through the glass walls the long line of the Champ de Mars stretching towards l'Ecole Militaire. People were lazily walking across it, tiny silhouettes already at such altitude. Towards the inside of the tower, you looked down at where you had stood just moments ago, and spotted the trumpetist who was still playing, although you couldn't hear him anymore. You kept on walking around the edifice, already towering the trees around you. You stopped your walk as you reached the side of the tower facing the Trocadéro and the bridge of Iéna. The Seine was calmly flowing before you, a few barges lazily floating down the stream. The sun glimmered on the Seine, like glitter poured in the river. The two statues at the entrance of the bridge seemed so little already at such height… you could see pass the Seine and even passed the Trocadéro, watching the rooftops of the closest buildings on the other side of the river. The blue sky where a few cotton-like clouds drifted aimlessly only brought more peace to the beautiful scenery. Next to you, Ben was grinning. He picked up his phone, and took a picture of the town through the fence that protected you from falling over.

"It really is beautiful, isn't it?" you breathed in a soft tone.

Ben nodded, letting his eyes resting on the town sprawled at his feet.

"It really is," his tone matched yours. "And you make it even more beautiful."

You looked up at him. You could have giggled his remark away, but something in his voice told you that he meant it. He meant it all…

Slowly, he turned his gaze to you once more, and you exchanged an earnest smile.

"Am I going too far? By saying that?" he asked in this same soft tone, barely audible as his voice was carried by the wind.

He cleared his throat before speaking again.

"I mean… I don't want to be too fast, or to forward… I'm not so… direct, usually."

"Is that your attempt at getting better at flirting?" you asked with humour, making him chuckle.

"I was doing a little more than flirting," you replied with a smile.

You gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, and he seemed to understand what your gesture meant. That it was okay. That you felt that way too. He seemed to relax, and his smile widened. The wind pushed a strand of his dark hair before his eyes, but he didn't seem to care about it and didn't bother brushing it away.

"Does that bother you if we take a picture together?" you asked him after a short silent.

He shook his head with a smile, and you moved closer to him to take a selfie with him. Behind you, the view was breathtaking. And to take the picture, Ben released your hand to wrap his arm around you. Though his hold was loose, much like the way he had held you the day before for this picture with Darth Vader, it still brought butterflies to your stomach and made your heart trip in your ribcage.

He didn't release you immediately after you had taken the picture and put your phone away. Instead, his eyes settled on Paris once more, keeping you close to him. You rested your head against his shoulder, watching the tourists passing by and studying how the pieces of iron joined and parted in the structure of the pillars.

Eventually, you moved out of his delicate embrace, but Ben took your hand in his again, and you climbed up to the second floor, that offered you a beautiful sight on the whole Paris, the rooftops glistening under the sun. After a while, you climbed up to the top, but found out that it was a little too high for you…

Your hold on Ben's hand tightened, and he turned to you with a questioning look as you came to a stop.

"Is everything alright?" he asked in a soft and deep voice that warmed your very soul.

"Yeah, it's just… high," you answered with a glance towards the Seine that drifted away more than two hundred meters under your feet.

Ben's eyes followed your glance and his head span a little at the sight. He quickly looked away.

"Yeah, okay… perhaps it's a little high," he admitted with a nervous laugh.

"The view is nice though," you added, nodding towards the sight of the town splayed at your feet.

"I could make a flirty remark about that," Ben humorously wrinkled his eyebrows and you couldn't help but laugh.

"You still have so much work to do on that flirt!" you replied with a faked roll of your eyes.

"Would you teach me?"

"I'm too scared right now to acknowledge that flirt of yours."

"Would you like to go downstairs?"

"Yeah… let's get back to the second floor. That was better for my fearful nature!"

"I don't like so much height either, if it can reassure you."

"Actually it doesn't. Means that you won't be my knight in armour who will save me."

He let out a laugh.

"Oh, I don't think you're the kind of woman who needs a knight in shining armour," he replied as you walked back towards the stairs. "I don't think you need anyone."

"Really?" you questioned, wondering in silence if he was right or wrong.

"Really. I'm just lucky you're willing to share some time with me. But you don't need me."

"Well, of course, you're a perfect stranger," you replied in a detached tone that sounded a little detached to be completely earnest.

Ben raised an eyebrow.

"Now, you shouldn't underestimate yourself," he admonished.

You didn't answer, merely giving him a smile instead, and you leaned against the bannister of the second floor, your eyes drifting across the rooftops again. You looked at the tiny dots crossing the Champ de Mars and the tall trees swinging in the wind. The air was even colder here than below the tower, and you couldn't help but shiver. In his hand, your fingers were frozen. Ben furrowed his brow a little.

"You look like you're turning in a human ice-cube," he pointed out, making you chuckle.

"I'm rather cold," you admitted.

Ben had noticed a shop that sold macarons and warm drinks, and he proposed to make a little stop there to get warmer. You accepted enthusiastically and let him guide you through the tourists who were so eager to see the view.

Ben offered you a box of macarons and a warm tea, and you settled at a table together. It was warm inside, and you heaved a content sigh as you looked at the view once more, still visible across the glass wall of the teashop.

You took a bite in one of the tiny cakes, and couldn't refrain a little moan… it was so good…

Ben chuckled at your reaction, taking a purple biscuit as well.

"That's so good, my god…" you mumbled, finishing the biscuit.

"I have to admit that it's not that bad," he nodded, eating his own macaron in one mouthful.

He noticed that you weren't wearing the same jumper, and he narrowed his eyes a little. If this jumper was definitely more beautiful than the ridiculous cloth you had bought at Disneyland, it didn't look warm at all.

"I thought you didn't have any other warm jumper," he nodded towards your beige pullover.

"Yeah… but I couldn't walk through Paris with that ugly one we bought!" you replied.

You didn't tell him the real reason you weren't wearing it. But something in his eyes, a little glint of mischief that suddenly alit, made you think that he had guessed.

"Besides, you're not wearing yours either!" you replied, eating another macaron, and you couldn't help another soft moan as you ate the pink biscuit, making Ben smile.

"No, but… I didn't need that jumper. I just didn't want you to feel too bad at looking ridiculous."

"See! I told you I was ridiculous! I couldn't wear it here, today…"

"But you look like you're freezing," he pointed out.

"Not anymore," you defended yourself.

He narrowed his eyes at you again.

"I know this is supposed to be a date, but I hope you're not freezing just because we are… having a date."

"Why…? No!" you defended yourself, although Ben was 100% right. "Of course not!"

"Good. Cause you don't need to do that… I like you already."

"You think I'm desperate enough to do everything for you already?"

Your words were a bit harsh, but your tone was full of humour, and Ben chuckled.

"I think that you shouldn't do that. Besides, I like that ridiculous jumper of yours."

"No, you don't," you shook your head.

"No, I don't," he admitted, and you both let out a laugh.

Ben picked up a map of Paris from the pocket of his coat, and looked up at you as he unfolded it.

"Where do you want to go next? I reckon we should go to the Trocadéro. Perhaps we can go to the Champs Elysées this afternoon."

"I want to go to Notre-Dame too," you added with an excited look all over your face.

Ben didn't even notice the smile that crept up his lips at the sight of your expression. You looked almost childish, happy… You looked adorable.

"Right, we can definitely do that," he nodded.

"I've always dreamt to go there," you admitted.

"In his book, Victor Hugo described it so well… It's definitely a place I want to see."

Your smile broadened.

"You read Notre-Dame de Paris?" you asked, and Ben nodded.

"It's extremely depressing, but it's such a good book!"

You agreed, and the two of you exchanged another smile.

You picked up one more biscuit, and you noticed that you had already ate much more of these macarons than Ben. He noticed your discomfort, and laughed it away.

"I prefer salt to sugar. You can eat them all if you'd like."

"Really? You can resist something so good?"

He seemed to hesitate, before picking up another macaron.

"Okay, perhaps leave one or two for me."

You both laughed, before setting the conversation on your lives again. He told you funny stories about his jobs, and you told him about your work. You talked about your families as well, until your two teas had disappeared from the cups and all the macarons were eaten away. You hadn't noticed how time had been flying by, but as you took a look at your watch, you were surprised to find out that it was past eleven already.

Ben paid for the macarons and tea – he insisted on inviting you, so you finally yielded – and you walked back outside and down the long flights of stairs. You reached the concrete again, abandoning the iron of the tower. As you walked under the Eiffel Tower, advancing towards the Seine, you noticed that the trumpetist was still there. A young singer had joined him, her warm voice singing the lyrics of the song he was playing on his trumpet. La Vie En Rose had changed into Göttingen, Barbara replacing, and you and Ben slowed down your pace as you passed before them, until you stopped altogether to listen to the song.

Bien sûr nous, nous avons la Seine

Et puis notre bois de Vincennes,

Mais Dieu que les roses sont belles

A Göttingen, à Göttingen.

Nous, nous avons nos matins blêmes

Et l'âme grise de Verlaine,

Eux c'est la mélancolie même,

A Göttingen, à Göttingen.

"Do you know what they're saying?" you asked Ben softly, your voice a whisper as to not disturb the delicate song.

Ben shook his head.

"I don't speak French well enough to understand what it's about."

"It sounds beautiful though."

"It does."

His fingers brushed against yours, and slowly, you intertwined your fingers together. He moved a little closer to you, and you rested your head against his shoulder.

Your heart was beating so fast in your chest, and yet you felt so peaceful. It was a strange sensation full of contrasts, but it felt wonderful. And Ben felt the same.

The soft rhythm of the song was like a warm blanket wrapping around the two of you, despite the fact that the lyrics remained a mystery to you.

Quand ils ne savent rien nous dire,

Ils restent là à nous sourire

Mais nous les comprenons quand même,

Les enfants blonds de Göttingen.

Et tant pis pour ceux qui s'étonnent

Et que les autres me pardonnent,

Mais les enfants ce sont les mêmes,

A Paris ou à Göttingen.

"Do you think it's a love song?" you asked Ben softly.

He shook his head.

"No, I don't think so."

"It sounds like one though."

O faites que jamais ne revienne

Le temps du sang et de la haine

Car il y a des gens que j'aime,

A Göttingen, à Göttingen.

"I don't think it's a love song… or at least, not a romantic one. I don't understand much but… I reckon that it's more about loving each other in general… you see what I mean? That we're all the same and we shouldn't fight each other, cause it doesn't make sense at all to fight someone who's exactly like you. I'm not sure I understand it right though…"

"Well… it's a love song then. An even bigger one."

You and Ben exchanged a smile, staring at each other for a moment. For the second time that morning, the world around you faded away until nothing but the music and the two of you remained.

He hesitated for a second. He was staring at you, and for a moment, he was afraid to go too far and that you would push him away. But he couldn't stop himself.

Softly, he leaned down to rest his lips on your head, and he kissed your hair.

At the sensation, you closed your eyes, tightening slightly your hold on his hand. And while the song continued, Ben left his lips pressed against the top of your head, breathing deeply in the scent of your sweet shampoo mingling with that peculiar smell of Paris, and he knew that he would never be able to forget this scent…

Et lorsque sonnerait l'alarme,

S'il fallait reprendre les armes,

Mon cœur verserait une larme

Pour Göttingen, pour Göttingen.

You finally looked up at him, forcing him to remove his lips, and he looked at you with a serious expression that was almost scared. His eyes were almost black in the light of winter, and they searched on your features, as if they were looking for the answer to an unspoken question. You gave him a reassuring smile, and he seemed to relax, smiling at you as well.

You gave the musicians a few coins before Ben and you would walk away.

And as you advanced towards the Seine, the notes seemed to follow you for a little while longer…

You weren't sure what that song was about, but one thing was for certain: to you, from now on, it would be about love…

****************************

Tag list : @geeksareunique @giggleberts @sad-orange-thoughts @aylinnmasow @benbarnes-world @ladyblablabla @madamrogers @drinix @joelynnp @mxrihollxnd @rockintensse @newtstarmander @iammadeofstarsandlazyness @presstocontinue @ilmiopiccolounivers0 @ponycake27 @horsesreign @xinyourdreamsx @jbluevelvet @notkeppeki @daynigt-dreamer-stuff @fudgeflyss @stuckupstucky @snek-shit @suchatinyinfinity @i-padfootblack-things

#ben barnes #ben barnes x reader #ben barnes imagine #ben barnes fic #imagine #fanfic #writing

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sunnyvaiprion · 5 years

Note

Everyone keeps asking if you're going to give Julius all these skills...I'm no longer sure what he does anymore. (I don't think Julius knows either.)

The thing is - nobody knows what he does ever in general… it’s a mystery. His GP page is the biggest of those mysteries.

…But I think I know what he does. I already did sort of a guide on Julius, but a refresh with some highlights wouldnt hurt, even though I planned it as a joke post. Come with me under the cut.

First of all, I guess you all should know what the dragon boy does - annihilate ranged (and not only). Actually I sort of agree with what GP page suggest for his build, except I dont get why isnt any of the builds list Guard as a viable option but all hail QR I guess. Anyway, here’s mine!

I moved SS to him from Rein simply because he puts all his stats to good use. Not being able to merge a GHB unit is no longer a problem, and not having access to IVs isnt a big issue, as they’re good as they are for my taste (plus neutral IVs mean +1 to 3 strongest stats while merging). I’ll give him 2 remaining flower stats (+1 spd +1def) and DD4 in the future.

I use Julius as the biggest destructive force right here

in HELL. So you can at least assume all enemy units are well-built and in their majority are also +10.

And here’s some more misconceptions I’ve read:

—————-

“While Julius technically can battle magic blues, he naturally prefers to let his allies handle KOing them for him”

*W H E E Z E* LMAAAO, wh..what? You look at him being red and think he’s… that he is weak to blues, oh my… that’s his strongest quality. His domain. You can forget about mages when he’s around as long as you dont misposition some ally into their range. Yes, even blues. Even…

That’s R Tomebreaker Reinhardt yes dont ask me about it. He also had Luna and Heavy blade, but HB is nigh impossible to proc against Julius, and guard is active ; )

But what about…

Gotcha. That AoE even offed his guard wow.

—————-

“His paper-thin Defense also does not do him any favors, and he should avoid any unit who can target it.”

“Archers carrying Brave bows or that are able to quad Julius with or without support like Brave Lyn, Bridal Cordelia, WF Hinoka, and Halloween Jakob easily shut him down”

Any… really? Yeah it’s literally base 16 and you probably shouldnt put him under every single melee unit you see but… with Loptous and 2DD against bows/daggers? might as well…

oh but there’s super mobile L!Lucina…

(actually she usually deals more damage to him, like 11… big scare)

And brave bows… 0 x Anything is 0, basic math.

————

“Julia and Deirdre can KO Julius under the right conditions due to the effective damage to dragons they deal”

Stop. If he can take 0 damage from blues how much will you think Nagas will do?

Exaaactly! Deirdre’s tome doesnt even work on him. Well, I should say thes girls sometimes have nasties such as Pre-charged on turn 1 Glacies… damage? yes. KO? haha you wish.

…

Actually colorless dragonslayer daggers can sometimes kill him if they can double but… look at all those single 0 above. Doesn’t look like a double to me.

——————-

“Distant Counter”

DiStAnT CoUnTeR. Iceberg procs - you die, rules are simple (in some other match he had it ready from the get-go and OHKO’d B!Hector but I dont have the image). Other people will help charge.

But yeah ideally Julius doesnt need to fight everything, he isnt the only person in a team… find me a unit with no weakness. His weakness most often can be avoided by simple positioning, though.

—————-

Bonus:

wack

————-

He’s not that bad, you analythics are just cowards. I started with him from unmerged state before flower update to this, and he never disappointed me, he just got progressively stronger.

#answers #i'm sorry i cant shut up about my main carry #julius #fire emblem heroes #yeah i ... reinhardt...#but julius can do more simply due to the fact that #he can survive a lot longer and when you live you deal more damage #not to mention his ouf iceberg oneshors

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nijiimura · 6 years

Note

all the botanical asks ;)

damn you.

jasmine; what mythical creature do you wish actually existed?griffins hell yea

lavender; soundcloud or vinyls?soundcloud!!

primrose; what book does everyone right now need to read?annihilation by jeff vandermeer

lunar mist; do you like wearing other people’s shirts/jackets?depends on if they fit or not but YEA bc it smells like them its nice

bird of paradise; what was the best thing that happened to you this month?tomorrow im gonna see zoe im so fuckin ready

gardenia; what’s a promise you’ve recently made to yourself?that its gonna be ok

lion’s fairytale; would you rather be the sky, the ocean or the forests?the ocean

whirling butterflies; would you kiss the last person you kissed again?the question is who was the last person i kissed

marmalade skies; do you plan your outfits?dfjdsbnfjsbfhfd NO im a walking disaster

apricot drift; how do you feel right now?bored

everlasting daisy; what’s the last dream you remember having?i dreamed about seeing infinity war the night before i actually saw it and apparently in dream IW they never went to Wakanda and just shot footage just for trailers like they did in rogue one

queen’s cup; what are you craving right now?chocolate...

lavender dream; turn ons/offs?turn on - girls. turn off - men.

water lilly; when was the last time you cried? why?this morning bc my teacher sent me a pissed off email after i told me i was gonna be an hour late bc i missed the bus

lily of the valley; did the one person who hurt you most in your life apologize?no

winterberry; do you bite or lick your ice cream?whoever bites their ice cream are monsters

honey perfume; favorite movie ever?grand budapest hotel!!!!

desert rose; do you like yourself?hmmm next question

snapdragon; have you ever met or seen in person a celebrity?i took a selfie w a WWE commentator years ago

night owl; how many countries have you visited?2!

heliotrope; have you ever been in a castle?yea it was fucken sweet

creams and sky; what’s the craziest/bravest thing you’ve done?come out??

lantana; what’s on your mind right now?SLEEPOVER W ZOE TOMORROW

pumpkin patch; what’s your zodiac sign?leo... yknow... nya

tulip; name 5 facts about yourself.-i wear socks to bed bc my feet get cold!!-i have a scar on my wrist from a swinging accident w my little brother-i have a spotify playlist thats 122hrs long bc i just dump albums on there-abba is currently my favorite band-bleeding hearts are my favorite flowers bc they remind me of my late great grandma

daphne; do you believe in karma?yes??

queen of the meadow; ever been in love?yes

wisteria; whom do you admire and why?my dad tbh hes one of the hardest workers i know and has such a shitty job and deals w 90% of my family drama but hes always so positive and funny and i love my dad so damn much

angel’s face; what was your favorite bedtime story as a child?good dog carl

remember me; did you make someone laugh today?i fucken hope so

iris; do you believe in ghosts?YEA

lilac; if you could go back in time which time period would you visit?1979 just so i can go to an abba concert

caramel kisses; would you want to live forever? why/why not?hm no lmao

primula; what makes you sad?school. all these rohan ovas davpro keeps releasing

rain lily; was today typical? why/why not?yea i went to class and disappointed my teacher

queen anne’s lace; who do you trust the most?zoe

lady’s slipper; what did you have for breakfast today?nothing... and i had nothing for lunch either.... all ive had is some lemonade and poptarts i bought like an hour ago

forget me not; do you have any regrets looking back in your life?going to this damn college

lunaria; what’s your favorite fictional universe?ok star wars universe is rad as fuck

violet; favorite tv show?the office and kitchen nightmares HDJIFDNJF

sunflower; share a favorite quote.god idk man

snowdrop; what does your ideal day look like?im home alone and its raining outside and i have the windows open. i dont have any deadlines to meet and i spend the day drawing

tiger lily; do you have any hobbies?drawing and crying

peony; share a small random book passage that means something to you.BITCH IDK DO U THINK I READ?????

tea rose; what’s something you always wanted to do but were too scared?catch fireflies but i am SO terrified of all bugs its not funny

honeysuckle; do you usually date people your age or older/younger?my fucken age

sweet pea; who means the world to you? why?okuyasu nijimura means the entire world to me, and heres why (pulls out 50 page essay) no but my little brother

love in the mist; best books you’ve ever read?have yall... dabbled in these books called warriors by erin hunter?

foxglove; who is your favorite cartoon character?im not even into su anymore but amethyst always wins

magnolia; coffee or tea?coffee

crown imperial; would you rather be extremely rich or extremely loved?Why Not Both Thot

snowflake; are you a dog or a cat person?WHY NOT BOTH THOT

bell flower; what is your biggest addiction?hey guys im smoking the latest coolest drug called okuyasu nijimura

cosmos; do you ever think about the galaxy?y...yes

moonflower; what’s your favorite color?yellow

freesia; do you have a good relationship with your parents and siblings? why/why not?yea we tight

sundrop; are you a morning or a night person?night

poppy; have you ever dealt with a mental illness?idk if adhd is a mental illness or not so imma say... maybe

clover; how would your friends describe you?

fucken gay

dandelion; do you consider yourself and extrovert or an introvert?depends :/

lilly; what’s something you love watching/reading but you are too embarrassed to admit you do?bitch idk man im an open book i embarrass myself on a daily basis

anemone; describe yourself in 3 words.dumb gay bitch

lotus; best memory as a child?my mom bringing my cat bill home for the first time!!! he was so small.......

angelonia; what is your eye and hair color?brown and brown

dahlia; do you like crystals?yea imma shove my dick in a geode

buttercup; if you could change one thing in the world, what would it be?grievous real so i can fuck him

baby’s breath; what’s your hogwarts house?hufflepuff

calendula; biggest pet peeve?specific but when im literally just sitting in the car and one of my parents goes “looks like SOMEONE has an attitude” like?? i was silently looking out the window

blanker flower; would you rather go to a cocktail party with your best friends or stay home and read a book/watch a movie with your pet?friends bc i love them so much

blazing star; share a secret.I DONT HAVE A FUCKEN SECRET

carnation; would you rather live longer or happier?happier

petunia; who’s story is your biggest inspiration in life? why?bitch im too tired to answer this

bluebell; do you wear glasses?no

nymphea; forest or river?river

orchid; do you like exercise?HFDJKSFNDKJSDFNFK WHO TF DO I LOOK LIKE.

pansy; do you like poetry?FUCK poetry

morning glory; any special talent that you have?i can do a good swedish chef impression

#megan answers #thanj fuckin god this is voer #long post #Anonymous

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seablu · 7 years

Note

Do 1-50 ho

1: what is your name and does it mean anything?my name is olivia, it just means olive

2: how long have you known your best friend?15 years! wow omg

3: what position do you normally sleep in?on my side cuddling a pillow usually

4: were you a part of any “clique” in high school?only at one school, i was totally in the super angsty kids club that sat against the wall (aka “the emo wall” or “the wall of shame”) at lunch and played guitars.

5: who was your favorite teacher in high school and why?ms. komori! i didn’t have the option to take japanese at my first 3 high schools, so when i got to my 4th one my senior year, i was in a freshman class she was teaching. they were awful to her but she still tried her absolute best to teach them and make sure they knew she cared about them as individuals. she talked a lot about the importance of mental health and self care & always made sure her class was a safe space for everyone, always had food in case anyone hadn’t eaten, made sure to ask if she wasn’t sure if somebody was okay.. basically she was just a literal angel always. that was so long wow,,, yeah i love her

6: do you wish to travel a lot?yes, 100%

7: did you participate in any sports while in school?not really, but marching band did kinda feel like a sport sometimes lol

8: show a sample of your handwriting:i would, but i am on a plane and i have no pen

9: have you ever given blood?no! i always wanted to, but they always told me i didn’t weigh enough

10: do you like the way that you grew up?not really but i’m still lucky

11: do you like your siblings? why or why not?my brother doesn’t really have a personality yet so idk

12: how did you meet your best friend and why did you become friends?our dads were both pilots for eagle at the time & we were three, and they decided to get us together so they took us to chuck e cheese. honestly i have no idea how we became best friends cause she stole my tokens and i’m pretty sure I punched her?? but i haven’t seen her since the deep end of my scene phase in 9th grade and she’s finally coming to see me IN 4 DAYS

13: name one movie that made you cry.gran torino ooh shite

14: do you prefer to read poetry, write poetry, or neither?both

15: things about someone that you find attractive?literally everything abt the person that sent me this ask

16: what song are you currently listening to?general tso what by jank

17: Have you ever broken a bone? If so, how?my nose, once by flip-turning directly into the wall during my big freestyle relay at state (i still won) and once again at a concert. i was watching emmure from barricade and some fucker behind me literally threw a crowdsurfer, and he landed right on me, so my face went directly into the metal barricade & re-broke my nose. i then went straight to the pit and got punched to top it all off! (i had 2 black eyes at school for like a week and a half & all my teachers thought someone was beating me)

18: a random memory from you childhood:i forced my parents to let me dress up as bob the builder for halloween when i was four

19: where did you grow up?ft. worth texas & ardmore oklahoma

20: what was the last thing you watched on tv?the office

21: do you think you’d make a good parent?yes but i have to get all the crazy out of my system first

22: would you like to meet any of your tumblr friends in person?no bc i don’t have any

22: what was the last dream you remember having?i went back to one of my old high schools to watch a football game and there were only 3 people in the marching band

23: when is your birthday?july 23rd, exactly one week from today!

24: how many pillows do you sleep with?two or three

25: do you wear glasses? If so, how long have you been wearing glasses?i was prescribed some last year but i lost them a few months ago, i only really needed them cause they were supposed to help with my migraines but they didn’t anyway

26: what color is your hair?dark brown

27: name 5 facts about your appearance:i’m short & tiny, i have really pale skin, my hands are oddly big, i have a few freckles in summer & i have 0 hips

28: what is your favorite soda?this peach soda i tried overseas oh my goodness gracious

29: what is a strange talent that you have?idk i can play the french horn

30: how’s the weather right now?looks real dry over new mexico rn

31: why did one of your friendships end?because he made me very uncomfortable & did a lot of really creepy, inappropriate things i won’t go into on the internet

32: who do you miss right now? the person that sent this ask

33: why did your last relationship end?bc i found out he didn’t love me at all and was just using me.

34: are you still figuring out who you are?absolutely

35: have you ever been admitted to a hospital? why?quite a few times, yeah. a variety of reasons but the most recent time was because i had a super violent bug and needed to be put on an IV

36: what is your favorite restaurant?i don’t think i have one

37: what is word that you always seem to spell wrong?annihilate

38: would ever adopt kids?absolutely

39: what is your favorite kind of pizza?classic pepperoni

40: what was your first thought when you woke up this morning?i was in a hotel room with my family and my half asleep mind thought my mom’s snoring was a weedeater

41: when was the last time you got really really happy and why?earlier this month when i stayed a few days with @manilla-folder cause i’ve missed him for so long and he’s my favorite person in the world

42: what’s the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten?someone dared me to eat a fish eye in japan and i did it.

43: how do you start a conversation?.. i usually do not

44: what’s a band you’ve been obsessed with lately?the japanese house

45: do you come from a family “of money?”not really, nope

46: do you have a bucket list?yes

47: what is your favorite series of books?i don’t have one, all my favorites are novels

48: when was the last time you laughed so hard your stomach hurt?one of the days when i was laying around with @manilla-folder , i don't even remember what he said but oh my god he was so funny and i couldn’t breathe

49: where do you go when you’re sad?to my bed or on long drives

50: 5 random facts about yourself:i love outer space, i can’t do a backflip, my cat is missing one of his front teeth, i want to live in japan one day, and my favorite color is light pink.

#audite #ask #answered #you used to do this on anon every single time i reblogged a question post like this #and oh my god once there were like 200 questions but i still did it #✨

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captainsbabysitter-blog · 7 years

Text

Jim Kirk Headcanons

Let’s start at the very beginning. A very good place to start. I should note that these are all TOS headcanons because honestly I love TOS more; each character just has more... Character. Just my opinion.

Questions under the cut!

Addendum: This took forever, so I may just answer asks unless I get reeeeally bored again.

1. What does their bedroom look like?

On the Enterprise, I see his room being somewhat sparse. He’s busy making strategies and interacting with other crew members in his off time. His home off-ship is full of shelves upon shelves of books. Jim is a reader. It’s how he escaped a less than awesome childhood and it expanded into a genuine, everlasting love.

He would also have posters of space. Educational, nerdy posters depicting the blueprints of ancient space shuttles and schematics for various things that grabbed his fancy.

And his chess boards. I hardcore headcanon that Pike taught him chess and he has several boards on various flat surfaces throughout his bedroom, but there’s one that’s special. One that has really crudely carved out pieces on a board with roughly painted black squares checkered with the natural light tones of pine that he made himself when he was on Tarsus IV and it’s a reminder of his belief in no-win scenarios and his duty to those who depend on him that stays with him even after he’s given his captaincy on the Enterprise.

2. Do they have any daily rituals?

Jim walks every path of the ship at least once a week. He likes the first-hand knowledge that everything is okay, everyone is safe, and he has a rotating schedule of the areas he visits. Mondays and Tuesdays are the upper decks, and so on and so forth.

Sometimes Bones or Spock will join him if they’re feeling up for it, but for the most part it’s just something he does himself.

3. Do they exercise, and if so, what do they do? How often?

See above. Beyond that, yes. He practices fighting styles and does other strength training on top of his daily walks.

4. What would they do if they needed to make dinner but the kitchen was busy?

He’d help in the kitchen, honestly. He’s not particularly good at cooking, but he can do some basic stuff and whatever helps moves things along faster is what he’s going to do.

Just picture him wearing a Kiss The Cook apron over his command golds, flour on his nose and an easy grin.

5. Cleanliness habits (personal, workspace, etc.)

It depends. His work space is spotless. He needs that clear space to stay in the right headspace for leading an entire ship.

Home? Home is a disaster. He has projects on every surface, pictures and posters all over the walls, and it’s sort of an organized mess, but it IS a mess.

6. Eating habits and sample daily menu.

This one is less headcanon and more canon. If he can get away with eating steak and fries with every meal, he’s going to. But everyone knows Bones would annihilate him before his arteries had a chance to clog, so he’s forced to eat some greens once in a while.

7. Favorite way to waste time and feelings surrounding wasting time

Chess or reading or even just sitting in the rec room watching his crew enjoy themselves. In his eyes, time isn’t wasted if it’s spent on something enjoyed.

8. Favorite indulgence and feelings surrounding indulging

He indulges in expensive alcohols on special occasions.

Promotion for him or a member of his crew? A few fingers of a nice southern bourbon Bones gave him for Christmas.

Spock or Bones’ birthday? Share a few fingers of a scotch Scotty brewed up in that “secret” still of his.

Anniversary of the Enterprise launching with its present crew? Enjoy a few with his favorite people and reminisce about the fun they’ve had and the dangers they’ve faced and survived and remember the people they’ve lose (because Jim remembers every. single. one)

9. Makeup?

He wouldn’t be above a bit of color on special occasions or if it were culturally important, but he would stick mostly to concealer/foundation.

10. Neuroses? Do they recognize them as such?

He has a near-neurotic need to ensure himself that his Enterprise family is safe. Even after his long walks along the ship, he would stop by the places he knows Spock and Bones will be just to check up on them before he retires to his own rooms for the night. They would come to expect him and know that it makes Jim feel better knowing where they are and that they’re safe.

If questioned, he’ll deny it. Doubly so if you claim it’s neurotic in any way.

11. Intellectual pursuits?

Oh oodles. Jim will take on any intellectual pursuit he’s presented with if only because he’s curious. Even if he doesn’t keep up with it or loses interest after a day or two of poking around and getting a feel for it, he has at least a passing knowledge in a multitude of fields.

12. Favorite book genre?

All of them. He’d have his reasons for each individual genre and wouldn’t be able to choose just one.

13. Sexual Orientation? And, regardless of own orientation, thoughts on sexual orientation in general?

Pansexual. I’ll note here that to me, the term pansexual means that he would appreciate people on all places of the gender spectrum and various representations.

But Jim wouldn’t really call himself that. He doesn’t really bother with labels like that for himself, but doesn’t really judge other people for theirs either.

14. Physical abnormalities? (Both visible and not, including injuries/disabilities, long-term illnesses, food-intolerances, etc.)

Jim has a few food allergies, and tree nuts of any kind is a big one. It’s severe enough that the replicators have a restriction barring them from making anything with nuts as an ingredient.

Not sure why, but I also always saw him as being allergic to cats.

15. Biggest and smallest short term goal?

Biggest short term goal is to get Bones and Spock to openly admit they enjoy each others company.

Smallest is getting through two away missions in a row without everything going sideways.

16. Biggest and smallest long term goal?

Biggest long term goal is getting through the mission without losing any of his officers. The events surrounding Wrath of Khan shattered him on multiple levels because he felt like he failed.

Smallest long term goal is to serve Starfleet as long as he can manage to get away with.

17. Preferred mode of dress and rituals surrounding dress

Outside of uniform, he’s not picky about his clothes. He’d rummage through his closet until he found something resembling a full outfit and call it good.

18. Favorite beverage?

Saurian brandy, but he doesn’t indulge in that too often.

19. What do they think about before falling asleep at night?

Jim thinks back on any mistakes he may have made that day either on the bridge or on an away mission and would devise ways to go about them in better ways next time. He’s a renowned strategist, and he didn’t get that way by accident. He enjoys thinking up these sorts of scenarios and solutions; it’s relaxing and helps him sleep knowing that he’s ready for anything the universe might throw at him.

20. Childhood illnesses? Any interesting stories behind them?

None, really. There’s a reason he was spared on Tarsus and it wasn’t because he was sickly or suffering from any sort of illness.

21. Turn-ons? Turn-offs?

Confidence is a huge turn-on for him. It sounds cliche, but Jim loves a person who knows how to handle themselves. He also has a thing for throats and necks.

He can’t get into someone who feels like they’re better than others. You could be the richest person in the known universe with looks that take the breath of all who look upon you, but if you snub a server or sneer at someone of a lower caste, Jim won’t look at you twice.

22. Given a blank piece of paper, a pencil, and nothing to do, what would happen?

Depends on his mood. He might jot down some random thoughts that he doesn’t want to forget, but he’s more likely to make little doodles. He once spent an hour listening to Bones and Spock bicker and drew them while they did it. It’s one of his favorite drawings.

23. How organized are they? How does this organization/disorganization manifest in their everyday life?

He functions on a sort of organized chaos. He has an order in which he responds to problems, and his work space is immaculate, but if he’s studying or researching, he’s very much one of those people who would have PADD’s or even books strewn all around him while he’s searching for exactly what he needs.

24. Is there one subject of study that they excel at? Or do they even care about intellectual pursuits at all?

Tactics. There’s a reason he loves chess so much, and he’d love the challenge that comes with a new, unfamiliar opponent.

25. How do they see themselves 5 years from today?

If he has any say, he’ll still be on the Enterprise with his favorite people, exploring the universe.

26. Do they have any plans for the future? Any contingency plans if things don’t workout?

His only real plan is the Enterprise. He wants to fly until he can’t anymore and then he wants to settle down with Bones and Spock when they’re all retired. Any other plan isn’t acceptable to him.

27. What is their biggest regret?

That he didn’t know his son the way he feels a father should.

28. Who do they see as their best friend? Their worst enemy?

Spock and Bones are his best friends.

Khan is his worst enemy.

29. Reaction to sudden extrapersonal disaster (eg The house is on fire! What do they do?)

He’s trained to respond in emergencies, so he’s the one grabbing the extinguisher and/or making sure the others are somewhere safe before he lets himself hand the reigns over to someone better equipped to deal with it.

30. Reaction to sudden intrapersonal disaster (eg close family member suddenly dies)

Jim goes inward when someone close to him dies. He sits alone in his room and truly contemplates what life will be like now that that person is gone, and if he drinks just a bit too much in those moments? Well there’s no one there to chastise him.

31. Most prized possession?

Anything gifted to him by someone close to him. The secretly joint gift of reading glasses and print novel given to him by Spock and Bones on his birthday are his favorite.

32. Thoughts on material possessions in general?

He could take ‘em or leave ‘em. He doesn’t have a lot of space for such things on the ship, so it’s not something he’d really care about.

33. Concept of home and family?

The Enterprise and her crew are his home and family, and ultimately home is wherever he can be with Bones and Spock.

34. Thoughts on privacy? (Are they a private person, or are they prone to ‘TMI’?)

Jim’s a surprisingly private person. He doesn’t feel the need to broadcast every single happening in his life to anyone other than those that are the closest to him. A captain needs to maintain a certain amount of decorum with his crew no matter how close they get.

35. What activities do they enjoy, but consider to be a waste of time?

He doesn’t see anything that he enjoys as a waste of time. A waste of time implies it was both not enjoyable and serves no higher purpose.

36. What makes them feel guilty?

Failing in any way that results in injury to a member of the crew. That sort of thing eats at him for weeks.

37. Are they more analytical or more emotional in their decision-making?

A good captain knows how to balance both. He wouldn’t put one over the other because they’re both essential to his very being and so he goes with his gut, but he backs it with facts (even if the facts are made up on the fly).

38. Would they consider themselves a Type A or Type B personality?

He considers himself a Type B. Someone has to balance Spock and Bones, and besides... Being high strung never got him anywhere.

39. What recharges them when they’re feeling drained?

Chess with Spock or a nice stiff drink with Bones.

40. Would you say that they have a superiority-complex? Inferiority-complex? Neither?

Neither. He’s as good as he is, but he’s no better than anyone else. Yeah, there are people that are better than him, but they have experience that he doesn’t and strives to achieve.

41. How misanthropic are they?

Not at all.

42. Hobbies?

Reading and chess.

43. How far did they get in formal education? What are their views on formal education vs self-education?

You don’t get to be a captain by dropping out and never finishing school. He has a lot of extensive schooling both through the standard system and through his years at the academy.

44. Religion?

Not religious.

45. Superstitions or views on the occult?

Skeptical. He’s never seen evidence that any of these things exist, so he doesn’t tend to believe in them.

46. Do they express their thoughts through words or deeds?

Primarily words, but also in deed. He’s a diplomat, and so he knows how to charm anyone if he sets his mind to it.

47. If they were to fall in love, who (or what) is their ideal?

He doesn’t have an ideal. An ideal implies that you restrict yourself to one type of person, and that’s just not Jim’s style. His only real requirements are that they be someone that he can find mentally stimulating.

48. How do they express love?

He’s a tactile lover. Touches to the arm, a hand at the lower back, a thumb brushing a cheek, laying so that the entire length of his body is touching his lover’s are all silent, simple ways Jim would express love.

49. If this person were to get into a fist fight, what is their fighting style like?

A little thing I’ve called James T. Kirk’s Full-Body Karate. It’s funny because he just... Flings himself at enemies.

50. Is this person afraid of dying? Why or why not?

No. It’s a possibility he’s long since accepted about his job and position in Starfleet. He knows that one day he might die and he’s made peace with it.

He’s still convinced that he won’t die so long as Spock and Bones are with him, however. After all, he’s going to die alone.

#jim kirk #james t kirk #star trek tos #headcanon discourse

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ruffsficstuffplace · 7 years

Text

The Keeper of the Grove (Part 72)

The dining hall of Manor Schnee had been temporarily turned into a combination situation room/planning area/mess hall for the space and the slapdash nature of their operations.

Among other Queensguard, Agent Gumshoe waited there, pulling out a Fizzle Stick from her breast pocket, putting it into her mouth, and lighting it with her antique Zippo. The tip of the candy started to crackle, the sugar inside it melting and pouring out the other side, and she began to chew.

“They say we were all lucky that we came when we did, guns blazing and putting all kinds of holes in the plans of the Heralds and whoever the hell the ‘Council’ are,” she said. “Poor bastards don’t realize we Queensguard didn’t have the winning numbers on our tickets, and probably never will.”

Used to it, and with their own eccentric quirks beside, none of the other agents commented.

“It’s a hard life, being a Queensguard.

“You got your personal issues, your awful pasts, and your honest desire to make a difference in this world and help people out by putting holes in others, wondering if you’re a fuckin’ hero who deserves a parade, or just a gun with two legs someone else is throwing into the fray for them.

“Then you join the program, and everything goes to even deeper shit.

“Physical training that’ll make the Old World’s Marine Corps weep. School, the kind of eyebrow burning usually done by people lookin’ to tack some fancy letters to their name, have people callin’ em Dr. Whoever-The-Fuck. And don’t get me started on the third part of our training…

“Psychological Conditioning’ they call it, if only because ‘Mental Torture’ doesn’t sound as nice.

“They build us up, then seni through straight through hell and back, then send us back for however many go-arounds it takes before we break. Then they pick the pieces up, glue ‘em all back together best as they can, rinse and repeat, until they either wash out, or they come out the other side one certified Badass Motherfucker who can take on goddamn anything.

“You can’t do something like that without leaving plenty of scars, though, some of them more obvious than others.

“Take Agent Qi, here. Fuckin’ obsessed with the number 7, and his fancy revolver.”

“Seven is life,” Agent Qi said. “Six bullets, one barrel—seven.”

“Won’t say no to a mission that doesn’t have anything—and I mean anything—about it that is or adds up to seven, be it the time the shit’s going down, the letters in the name, or even the coordinates on the map.

“But if it does, you can be sure as shit he’s going to coast through all that with a smile on his face, like he’s the luckiest man in all the realm.”

“Then there’s Agent Gwendolyn, AKA ‘The Knight.’

“Lost her whole team in a mission where she was shadowing all the other functioning nutcases we call ‘Queensguard Agents.’ Almost died along with them—had actually, for a few seconds before her suit’s revival protocols kicked in and zapped her brain back to life, but either something went wrong in the process, or it was that particular moment that she cracked like the rest of us Rank 7’s did, got it in her head that the only way she was going to get through this and more if Gwendolyn died, and was reborn as someone better.

“So now she goes around narrating everything like me, except she calls herself ‘The Knight.’”

Everyone stopped as a new agent walked in, carrying a tray of food in her still armoured hands.

“Hello everyone,” Winter said.

Gumshoe pulled out the free seat next to her.

“Thank you,” Winter said as she sat down, and began to eat.

“You’re welcome, doll. If’n you don’t mind, I’m gonna continue my whole shtick with you.”

“Go on ahead, Gummy, it’s not like it isn’t all over the Info-Grid,” Winter replied.

“Thanks, doll.” Gumshoe replied. She chewed what remained of her fizzle stick for a few moments, then continued.

“And then there’s Winter.

“You’d think the name was her call sign, seeing as she’s got a reputation for keeping her cool through everything; melting her walls and becoming the warmest damn person you’d ever met in your entire life if it’d serve her mission well to butter you up before she cut straight to your heart like a hot knife; and being more than a little bit of a bitch, but no:

“That’s what her grandma named her, like she could see in the future and decided to save a future lover the trouble of nicknaming her their own version of ‘Frosty the Snowbitch.’

“So what’s wrong with someone who sounds like the mythical Queensguard Agent that makes it through training completely intact? Even someone who looks about as well-put together as can be like Ironwood has got his issues.

“Five words: The Keeper of the Grove.”

Winter choked on her food. Gumshoe picked up her drink for her, she took a long swig then sighed in relief.

“You need me to stop, sweetheart?”

“I’m fine...” Winter whispered.

“If you say so. Anyway...

“As Fear is a pretty helpful emotion for getting your ass in gear when you need it to, she didn’t beat it out of her so much as she made it so that she was scared of as few things as possible. Maybe she might get startled or uneasy, but never shitting-your-pants terror.

“It had seemed like a good idea at the time: she was already pretty well and tramautized from a horror show way back when she was still a sweet and innocent kid, and what would be the problem with being scared exclusively by someone that only existed in myth, pop culture, and really bad costumes on Eve of the Ether?

“When it turns out they live in Reality too, that’s what!

“As the Keeper was terrorizing her and her little sis in this very mansion, us crazies in the Queensguard thought Winter had finally broken for good, that this time, there would be no picking the pieces back up and gluing them back together. All we thought we were doing when we hauled her conked-out ass back to base was fix her as much as possible before we set her up for a nice, quiet civilian life with a hefty pension and a whole lotta perks beside.

“Then we all watched the Keeper 86 her sister on live holovision, and it turned out that the only thing in little tiny pieces that couldn’t be put back together was what we thought was reality.

“Nothing new, really, considering all the other crazy shit that happens in Avalon that necessitates an even crazier bunch of loons willing to protect it—AKA the Queensguard—but it still caught us all off guard.

“By the time we realized our big mistake, her sister was dead, the rest of her whole family was in the ground or may as well have been, and since she only ever kept working for us to keep her sister safe, she had pretty much lost everything she ever gave a fuck about.

“And what do you do with someone with nothing to lose?

“Give them everything to gain—namely, the Shepherd Suit Mk. IV, the latest in the line.

“First, Piper’s gearheads strapped guns and sturdy pieces of scrap metal to exo-suits originally made for hauling boxes around, then we started slapping armour and weapons designed specifically for getting shot and shooting right back, and then we shrank it down so you if you wanted to enter a building, you’d only have to duck to avoid banging your head, than break down the door and take a good chunk of the wall while you were at it.

“So where do we go from there?

“You make it smaller, faster, and strap some wings and the very cutting edge in energy-weapons to it, is what you do.

“There’s only three things that are keeping the Big Guys Upstairs from equipping every single trooper with these:

“One, it’s expensive as hell to mine, refine, and use this much Exanite and a shit-ton of other super-rare metals that all the armour, the weaponry, and the wiring needs.

“Two, it eats up power like a bus full of relapsed alcoholics at last call for Happy Hour, which is why it’s a damn good thing it can take out entire armies in the blink of an eye.

“And three, once you put it on, you can’t ever take it off—unlike its older siblings, the spine-jack on this thing becomes part of your actual spine.

“We thought we were just making the best of a very bad situation like usual, squeezing out some more use out of someone we thought we were going to have to put out to pasture, and who didn’t want to go there yet, either.

“But it turns out, the timing couldn’t have been better, because now the little sister turns out to be a whole lot less dead than we thought, we’ve got a messiah gone missing and possibly rogue, and a whole bunch of loonies with alien magitech and animal ears running about the whole realm causing hell and talking about something they call ‘The Truth.’

“You could be blind, and still read all the signs pointing to the one place that has the answers to all the latest mysteries Avalon is throwing at us:

“The Viridian Valley.

“So how many of us loons are going with you out there, soon as it gets dark and we don’t get turned to people-jerky soon as we step out the barrier?” Gumshoe asked.

“None,” Winter replied. “I’m going in with two Tinmen, and that’s mostly for recharging my core.”

Surprise came over all the agents faces.

“Seriously, doll?” Gumshoe asked.

“Yes, seriously,” Winter replied, her serious expression the most serious the others had ever seen.

“Sure you won’t end up putting your waste-management subsystems on overdrive when you eyeball her?” Gumshoe continued.

“I’m sure,” Winter replied. “I may have been absolutely terrified of the Keeper for almost all my life, but that ends now, because the face of my nightmares has kidnapped my little sister, brainwashed her, and seduced her.”

She raised her fists to the sky and started screaming.

“DO YOU HEAR ME, KEEPER?!

“YOU SEALED YOUR FATE WHEN YOU ‘KILLED’ MY LITTLE SISTER ON LIVE HOLIVISION, AND I’M ONLY MORE DETERMINED TO UTTERLY ANNIHILATE YOU NOW THAT YOU’VE KISSED HER ON LIVE HOLOVISION, TOO!

“I’M SCORCHING YOU WITH MY LASERS LIKE BOTH THOSE SCENES WERE SCORCHED INTO MY BRAIN—ESPECIALLY THE SECOND ONE!

“SERIOUSLY! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!”

Winter sighed and got up from her seat. “Excuse me, everyone, I need to go get some last-minute repairs and upgrades before my big mission...”

“You do that!” Gumshoe yelled, as she and all the other agents were gathered up at the furthest corner away from Winter as possible, holding up their guns and projecting shields.

Winter left the dining hall, the agents slowly returned to their seats.

“Turns out there’s a fourth downside to the Mk. IV!” Gumshoe muttered as she chewed the last of her fizzle stick, pulled out a new one with shaking hands. “If it turns out the person you put it in is STILL pretty batshit insane, getting them out of the suit is going to be a LOT harder than putting them in…

“Like I said: we thought it was a good idea at the time...”

#rwby #fanfic #the keeper of the grove #white rose

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thevulernablepreacher · 6 years

Text

Energy Healing-Read it Anyway

Inspiration is a God thing. When it hits my mind is on fire. It courses through me. I LOVE it. Rarely am i somewhere i can write it down as its happening. I’m on the toilet or driving..recording doesn’t help. I forget i recorded and have zero to negative patience for listening back.

I read Lean Dunham’s piece on her breakup this morning when i woke up b/c it was front and center in my Instagram feed. IT’s gross how addicted I am. i had been looking at her photo’s lately, wondering if she’d broken up. I sensed it. The energy surrounding here screams it. She’s been looking so clearly sad behind what looks like attempts to put on a strong and happy front .

Someone wrote a reply saying so. I wanted to annihilate that person. I cannot tolerate the ease with which other people decide they're on an intimate enough basis to say this kind of shit to pepole. Of course she looks sad you ignorant fuck; you think she doesn’t see that or know that? She’s a fucking creative genius living in her emotions at every flipping second. So that’s not a helpful reflection.

I hate the word trigger but that comment clearly did just that to me. But that’s not at all what i want to write about.

What happened when i read that was that i fell in love with LD again. She blows my mind. She is an INCREDIBLE writer. She can talk about shit that we all talk about and experience in a way that no one articulates it. She has this special sauce ability with language to get into the nooks and crannies like a Thomas’s English muffin, so deeply descriptively.

I fell in love and i was jealous..so fucking jealous. I want to write that well. I want to be that fucking famous; not for fame sake, but i think maybe for the flow of cash (so i could work from an Adirondack chair) and for people desiring to hear more from me and thus paying gigs would fly in..a beautiful viscous cycle.

I had a mind blowing energy healing session yesterday and one of the things she said to me was, “I can just imagine your next speaking gig when you show up completely authentically; how powerful that will be.”

Well, i had that next gig this morning. I had to read a “purpose and overview” statement to my networking group at 7:15 am. i wrote it last night. I took two bowls of ground curried lamb topped with black salt, and three cups of chamomile tea get it good and done. It took probably an hour and 1/2 to complete. I love it and its torturous.

I read it this morning and i will tell you i was amazed at my sureness confidence. No longer is my voice shaky when i speak. I”m finding that to be true in my speaking club group too. I just feel right; strong, upright, grounded. I was listening to myself and i thought, “God, this is really good.”

I was speaking to a room full of humans of an incredible caliber. They are all seasoned vets, with solid truly “successful” and thriving businesses. More importantly, they are also stellar humans.

Interestingly there’s a lot of lesbians in this group. We have the woman who brought Title IX to Yale, back in the day. She was also the first female plumber in the state. She’s unbelievably awesome. We have an amazing acupuncturist and a landscape architect to die for: all lesbians. Amazing, so cool.

And in terms of men; stellar men. Incredible to be able to say that; and its true.

One of my mentors and fav’s among uttered, “wow” when i finished reading. Another caught my eye from a distance, beamed at me and gave me the thumbs up.

They’re all human of course, even though i pedistalize them (constant challenge for me). They've al made gaffs in the building process. I of course LOVE to hear about them. Nothing more fulfilling than hearing about stellar fuckups made by people i so admire. It takes a ton of come to Jesus moments, courage and perseverance to create a business, build it, hone it and nurture it constantly. Beyond belief.

The first thing i thought when sat down was: “is that what i’m supposed to be doing, speaking publicly”? The answer is yes. I’ve known this ALWAYS.

That question came this morning though b/c my energy healing session was about clearing a blockage between my solar and lunar chakras. She said she’d never seen a more perfect and equal imbalance. she was psyched and I was psyched. she cleared it.

The imbalance was making it impossible for me to live my life’s purpose.

I knew exactly when the imbalance came in. It happened after the best six years of my adolescence. And ironically i have been through 6 years physical pain, illness, total annihilation of feeling like Emily. So the six year thing she thought was incredible. I guess the jig is up.

What i learned: ANYTIME one has pain or feet issues it is because they are having Lunar issues. FASCINATING to me! Can you imagine if we all did energy healing instead of taking pills or having surgery? WTF!!!!!

Anyway a part of me got scared when she talked about showing up now authentically. Could i do that after mastering looking like i was showing up authentically so well? What would that feel like?

I talked to her about how I am able to create great intimacy, make people laugh, connect, when i speak publicly. So I am living my life purpose..sort of; the blockage part is that i keep the all at a 5 feet distance.

She asked about friendships; which ironically my former therapist asked me recently through an FB chat we were having. I said i have them; very close one’s but i never see them; any of them. it’s always been a source of great pain.

I don’t have daily intimacy. It makes me so so sad. You know those people who command the stage and can’t bear talking intimately with a group? I’m not that person. I have very intimate interchanges and time with close friends ..but it’s far from often. And when i do I then go home alone, and spend inordinate amounts of time alone.

Some of that is okay..but id prefer less at this point. Pain and illness have made that alone time grow; but it has been there since as early as I can remember.

And while i would love a best friend/partner who makes me laugh and with whom i can go to the movies, hang out, talk about nothing and everything with; i also stay away from it b/c i think it would suck to be with someone who has such intense forward and backwards and ups and downs..id be afraid of bringing them down and of becoming dependent upon them.

I know. I have a fear of true intimacy. I come by it so honestly it’s beyond.

I blocked off from true intimacy b/c performing was exhausting; performing in real life. i learned in my house that revealing all of me was going to receive very intense judgment and rejection.

Ive had two long term lesbian relationships. They were both abusive. Im so different now; that would not happen. And i think the right person will show up when the time is right; but i keep feeling like that may be close. I have a great curiosity as to what that will look like. It will be something i’ve never known before. This much I know.

I’m writing all of this b/c during the energy healing session my feet were buzzing. Afterwards i was able to walk in my adidas flip flops with the nubs comfortably for the first time in months. I was elated.

I thought...this shit works.

I talked about my very clear image of myself in my 60′s galavanting all over the globe with a partner having the time of my life; pain free; joyful, healthy. She asked that i write about the crazy creative that i was at Far Brook when i was a kid; when i was encouraged every day to be as insane and out there as I could possibly be.

My surrogate grandfather Mr. Finckle, would sit in the back of the hall while i did this larger than life evangelical thing. He loved it. My friend Donna would play some soap opera music and gospel music and i would just go. If I was watching myself now i think i’d find it hilarious. I was off my rocker in the best possible way.

I did this every day all day for 6 years. I laughed straight for 6 years. it never occurred to me to button up or quiet down. My music, humor, authentlic prowess, improv gifts were living LARGE. It was a magical creative faucet turned on and flowing at full force.

That’s me. That’s my essence.

I remember being at a visual art opening this past winter at a crystal gallery (yeah, really). I was being told as the artist was playing her violin. That not only did she create art. she was clearly a musician, and a writer. I thought: Jesus this art is hideous; but regardless, she has as show and is playing her music at her show and people are here loving all of it! WTF. And i thought, i too am a musician and an artist..and used to produce on full throttle. What happened to her?

So this morning...i was wondering after i read that piece: “was i being authentically me?” I know i was talking to a bunch of business people...but i think i was being me.

Im working on that really consciously now. I told my energy healer that really me is kind of messy looking and tatted abundantly. I wasn’t messy enough today for sure. And i would LOVE a few more tattoos.

I walked by a woman looking like an artist coming home from yoga yesterday. She was disheveled and nothing matched. And i thought she was stunning. She made me feel completely at home. She was a huge reflection of me at my most creative self. She would have been floored had i told her how much i loved her look.

So i am trying to button down big time; to be me in the realm of business and the real world..and watching; seeing what that might be.

I write all of this because i left my networking meeting early. I was in a fuck load of pain. My foot is not healed. My knees were killing me. another part of my foot was really hurting and i though omfg i think i restrained the right ankle area again..this is of course not the left ankle that is always stressed and restraining if i have the boot on.

A couple of people asked me why was there if i was in pain. I was completely flummoxed and searching for the answer. Why was I there when i was in pain?

Because i didn’t want to be in pain; because i thought i’d be okay. Because i rarely cancel on business things. Lately I'm cancelling more and not feeling guilty.

I was so fucking mad at my pain this morning. I told people i was mad, over it. Tired of shelling out cash like an ATM to heal myself. O.V.E.R. IT!

I get to say that. I so get to say that.

Im over the shame and i’m over the isolation it causes..i do everything in my power to heal. I seek every possible Western and alternative person on the planet..and still I am in pain.

I’m also confused and not sure how to proceed. I’m not good at figuring it out.

And because i’m me, this is what i think: There is something that i am not getting. There is something about my souls path that i am not answering.

That’s why i ask: “am i supposed to be speaking and not building this business?” Logic to me, and the inner voice says, “yes, that’s right.”

My life should flow. My life can flow. My life is not flowing.

When i’m in pain its really hard to be positive. Someone used the word “positivity” today at our meeting..a visitor. No one in our group would use that word. I wouldn’t be in a group that did. I would be throwing up all over the group if that was the case. I can’t stand that word.

It’s complete bullshit. You have to get the core of your shit to feel positive..i think i’m at my core. I cannot stand “words or quotes of the times”..horrifying.

I also wonder: "If i start speaking publicly will my physical pain just go away?”

I’m an unbelievable magical thinker. So i think that’s what the universe is waiting for.

For today i will wear my cool blue Bomba’s peds with my Adidias flip flops b/c for some reason that seems to ease the pain a bit. I think it’s just because the feeling of the nubs takes over.

I have no cohesive ending here; i’m just ending.

#soulpurpose #energyhealer publicspeaking lenadunham writing tryingeverything'

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